#and she totally threw me under the bus so now! she lost rights to speak to me

[pomfiores]

personally, I find it pretty sexy if not regal of me to knock out my work, service guests and finish side tasks within 2 hours and getting out of work early - before the immature woman who wants to play petty little high schooler games with me over a man (that's unrequited Drama I didn't give details on). it was nice watching her hustle as much as she can while I walked my happy ass out those doors.

[hangovercurse]

Worst Firsts

You and Colson go on Worst First with Brittany Furlan and Tommy Lee.

Request: “Have Colson(mgk) and reader (who are dating) go on worst first with brittany furlan(lee).LOVE YOUR WORK!!!❤❤”

Colson X Reader

Warnings: Cursing, talk of sex (no actual smut)

Word Count: 1684

“Hello all you fine folks out there and welcome back to Worst Firsts. Boy oh boy do we have the show for you today. First off, we have my husband, Tommy Lee, with us here.” Colson banged on the table as you gave out a small cheer. Brittany continued, a small laugh sent in your direction, “We brought our favorite Tommy Lee two-point-O Machine Gun Kelly back on the show today!” You cheered for your boyfriend as Tommy banged on the table. “And for her first time on the show, we have the wonderful Ms. Y/N Y/L/N!” Colson shouted for you as Tommy continued banging on the table. “Thank you guys so much for coming, thank you for coming back Colson. I am so excited you guys are here today.”

“I love bein’ here.” Colson said into the mic, shooting Brittany a smile.

“When you asked us to come on, I was so fucking excited.” You said, Colson nodding with you.

“For real, bro. She was off the walls.”

Brittany continued, speaking to her audience, “If you guys didn’t know, Gunner here played Tommy in The Dirt way back in 2019, which released right before you two met, am I right?”

You smiled lightly, a slight heat rushing to your cheeks as the focus turned to you and Colson. Luckily, he answered for you, “yeah, we met literally like maybe 3 days after the premiere. That was such a sick time in my life.”

“Dude, I bet. You release a kick ass movie and then turn around and meet-“ Tommy started, Colson cutting him off to finish his sentence.

“The love of my life, yeah.” You smiled bashfully, Colson’s arm finding its way around you and pulling you into his side.

Brittany smiled at you two, Tommy’s hand reaching over to grab hers under the table. “So, this show is all about first times and, while normally we would talk about worst firsts, I gotta know how you two met.”

“It’s honestly not much of a story,” you began, “Netflix had this party and we were both invited because we both had movies out on Netflix. I went up to him at the bar because I thought he was hot and we started talking and now, uh, we’re here.” Colson nodded as you recounted the memory.

“I was trying so hard not to fuck anything up though, because literally the entire night before she came up to me, I was trying to figure out how to talk to her.” Your boyfriend said, red on his cheeks.

Brittany sent you a mischievous smile, “so what happened after that? Did you give him your number, did he ask you out, something else?” The inflection in her voice and the wiggle of her eyebrows let you in on exactly what else she thought you might have done.

“Something along the lines of something else.” You said, a smile playing on your lips. Colson threw his head back in laughter. Tommy nodded with pride at you two.

‘Speaking of something else.” Colson began, making you look up to him in both confusion and panic, “This is all about worst firsts, right?”

“What are you about to say?” You asked him, a warning in your voice.

He giggled, “remember the first time we had sex in public?”

Brittany’s eyes went wide, “you two did what?”

Tommy asked, “first time?”

You leaned into Colson’s side, a blush rising to your face. “That was literally the most awkward experience of my entire life.”

Colson laughed at the expressions of the older couple, “okay, basically we were on tour in the middle of butt fuck nowhere and there was nothing in this town. No bars, no clubs, nothing.”

You continued his story, “but there was this tiny carnival. So, after the show we went in hope of something fun happening.”

Tommy laughed, “well something fun certainly happened.”

“After about an hour in we were bored and she was only gonna be on tour for a few more days.” Colson said, “so we figured we should make the most out of the lame ass carnival. And then we found it.”

“the photobooth.” You said, watching Brittany’s jaw drop.

“Him, I expect this from.” She pointed at Colson, “but you?”

You giggled, nodding your head, “It was her idea!” Colson exclaimed over your laughs.

“I hadn’t seen him in almost two months and was only on tour for two weeks, I had to make up for lost time and this was the only place that we could get any semblance of privacy.” You said, shoving Colson lightly as he grinned proudly at you.

“Wait so did you two get caught?” Tommy asked, intrigued.

Colson answered, “we didn’t get caught, per say, but as we were leaving this family came up to the booth. And I mean, there’s not a great way to hide that you’ve just had sex. We tried, but people still know.”

Brittany and Tommy laughed, the latter banging his hand on the table as he did so. “The look on that mother’s face. I thought she was gonna call the cops or something.” You said.

“Was it at least good?” Brittany asked to which Colson replied,

“we were in a photobooth, Brittany. No.”

Tommy chuckled, “I’m sure it was better than doing it on the tour bus.”

Your eyes went wide and a laugh tumbled from your mouth as you recalled the first time you and Kells had had sex on the tour bus. “We do not need to talk about that.” He looked down at you as he spoke, a look of warning in his eyes.

“Oh yes we do.” Brittany said, looking at you to speak.

“There’s not much to it, but as I’m sure you can imagine, the bunks are not the most spacious of beds. And Colson here is a six-foot-four giant who barely fits in the bunk as it is.” You began, giggling as Colson’s glare hardened on you. “Let’s just say Kells almost got a concussion because he hit his head so hard.”

Brittany laughed as Tommy spoke, “sex in the bus is difficult, dude. I get it.”

“Why didn’t you just go on top?” Brittany asked you.

Colson grumbled, “because she was “tired from her flight” and “didn’t want to get hurt.”” He used air quotes as he mimicked your words from the night, making Brittany and Tommy laugh.

“I sat on a plane for 9 hours to see you, the least you can do is top.” You said, shrugging as Colson let out a silent chuckle. “But yeah, it was not good.”

You continued to talk about other first times you’d had. You told the couple about your first kisses when you were younger, retelling the story of your first kiss in middle school when your braces got stuck on the poor kid’s lip.

Then Colson recounted the story of the first time you both went out on a boat together. “For context,” you started, “I am terrified of the ocean. I can swim but I refuse to go into any water that isn’t a pool.”

“We were out there with a couple of our friends and she was staying as far away from the edge of the boat as possible. And then some of our homies tried to pull her towards the edge and she freaked the fuck out.”

You pouted, “you fucking laughed the entire time it was not funny.”

“It was!” He exclaimed, “you were pulling away like a little kid.” You glared at him, “but, for the record because people are gonna think I’m a bad boyfriend, I made them stop. And then I dragged her towards the edge myself and made her sit with me.”

You then told the story of the first time you’d gotten a call from the hospital to come get Kells. “I was unaware that this was a normal thing. So, when I get a call at 4 am that he’s in the ER I was kind of freaking out. And then I get there and him and Rook are just sitting there messing around like two little kids.”

Colson chuckled, rubbing his face with his hands, “you were so worried when you first came in and then as soon as you saw us you got so annoyed.”

“What did you guys do that got you in the ER?” Brittany asked.

You deadpanned, “they were throwing knives around and Colson nearly cut off his finger.”

Tommy nodded, “nice.”

After a few more firsts, Brittany asked the final first worst, “what was the first or worst fight you guys got in?”

You looked at your boyfriend, trying to figure out what fight he’d pick. “The first big fight we got into was that night at the hospital that we mentioned earlier.” He said and you nodded in agreement. “Which I was totally in the wrong about.”

“Yeah. We got home and I literally couldn’t talk to him without wanting to scream.” You said.

Tommy tilted his head, “were you mad that he had gotten hurt or that he called you so late?”

You shook your head, “I was more frustrated than anything. Like I was fucking panicking because I thought something really bad had happened and he was treating it like a joke. But we talked about it and obviously we’re fine now.” You said smiling up at your boyfriend.

He grabbed your hand under the table, squeezing gently. “Yeah. That was also the first night I told you I loved you.” He said, nudging your shoulder with his own.

You rolled your eyes, nudging him back, “yeah, yeah. Don’t get all sentimental on me now.” You said, giggling silently.

Brittany and Tommy watched you, smiling like proud parents. “Alright folks, we’re gonna end this podcast here. Thank you guys so much for tuning in, thank you guys for coming.” She motioned to you two, “It’s always so nice to see you guys, love catching up with you. If you’re not already subscribed, you should do that. Leave a like, a comment, whatever you want.”

[tinyboxxtink]

Weird Secret Friends *Chapter 3*

I fixed it!!!! Huzzah!!!

If you didn't see it earlier, it was crap-tastic on my phone.

I'm glad so far people love this. <3

Part 2

Part 4

Tag List

@madamsnape921

@lolliepopsicle

@chasingeverybreakingwave

@milkshqke

@wanniiieeee

@word-scribbless

@gibbs274

@sassyada

@aprildecker-blog

@bookishfanfic

@stars-in-the-skies-world

@stars-trash-18

@omgsuperstarg

@objection-argumentative

-------------

When you returned everyone was laughing at chatting, except for Sonny who was drinking vodka and soda while on his phone. He looked up and saw you both returning, he jumped up to meet you.

“Hey, counselor. I hope Y/N wasn’t too hard on you,” He half laughed.

“Are you kidding me, Sonny?” You scoffed.

“She’s fine, Sonny,” He smirked. “I like a little fire in a woman,”

“Oh?” Sonny’s eyebrows suddenly raised, causing you to give Barba a look. He was blowing your cover!

“I mean, I expect it from Jersey girls anyway,” He flipped his compliment quickly.

“God…” You muttered, looking at the floor. Pick a side, counselor.

“Anyway, um,” Sonny cleared his throat, trying not to think about Rafael and you together. “So when do we do presents and cake? I’ve kind of got an early--”

“I’m sorry, what?” Rafael furrowed his brows at Sonny. “Did you-- Carisi did you really just say that?”

“Do you see a present table? Do you see a giant rat mascot running around?”

“...What? Did I say something--?” Sonny became flustered.

“What do you think this is, a fucking Chuck E Cheese?” He suddenly snapped, causing shocked looks from both you and Sonny.

“I’m sorry Barba, I--”

“Alright that’s it,” You stepped in between the two of them, glaring at Rafael.

“Excuse you?” Rafael crossed his arms.

“Y/N, knock it off,” Sonny hit you softly.

“You have been nothing but rude to my cousin since we got here, Mr. Barba,” You pointed a finger to his chest.

“He was just trying to be nice, getting you a gift out of the goodness of his heart, something you would know nothing about!” Maybe now you were overcompensating.

“Y/N!” Sonny said through gritted teeth.

“What?!” You turned to see everyone at the party staring at the three of you in shocked silence. “Oh…” Your voice turned soft, your face turned red.

“Well,” Rafael straightened his suit and tie, recovering from your little rant. “I guess I should be a gracious host and open it then, shouldn’t I?” He gave you a look.

“...Holy shit,” You heard one of the guests gasp. “That thing is over $1,000! My wife wouldn’t even get me that for Christmas,”

“NO!” Sonny objected rather loudly,. “I mean, that’s not necessary Barba. It’s just a little something, it’s fine,”

“No no, your cousin is right,” He shook his head as he walked over next to Sonny’s chair and retrieved the large gift bag and placed it on the table. Sonny bolted over, you trailed behind quickly.

“No, seriously Barba, don’t,” Sonny began to panic. You suddenly realized how this was going to look, maybe you shouldn’t have pushed.

“Carisi why are you being like--” Rafael was questioning him but was silenced mid-speech when he pulled out the briefcase. His eyes went wide, you swore you heard a few people audibly gasp, You looked around completely lost, finally noticing the absolute horror on Sonny’s face.

“....Is this a Louis Voutton Robusto 2 in Taiga leather, Carisi?” Rafael whispered, running his fingers over the fine leather.

“Oh my god,” You couldn't watch this. Sonny had such a big heart, too big of a heart. He tried so hard...why didn’t you step in sooner?

“Uh y-yeah, sure Barba whatever you want,”

“Carisi, can I speak with you a moment outside?” Rafael blinked rapidly, trying to wrap his head around what was happening right now.

“Do you guys need somewhere to make out?!” An obnoxious man laughed, making the other guests snicker.

“Oh shove it Buchanan,” Rita hit him. “Sonny’s just his puppy,”

“Oh god,” Sonny muttered under his breath as he followed Barba outside. He didn’t know which was worse for people to think right now.

“This is totally inappropriate, why would you even--” He threw his hands over his head. God it was one thing knowing Sonny had a thing for him, but for him to finally make a move like this-- in front of his peers? His colleagues? The audacity.

You wondered if you should follow them. You were the one to cause this mess, after all. Also you really didn’t like the looks you were getting from the rest of the party-goers. You quickly began to follow after them, you could hear Rafael yelling from a mile away.

“What the hell is WRONG with you, Carisi?!”

“I-I’m sorry, Barba I--”

“WHAT?!” Sonny’s eyes instantly went to you. “W-Why would you…? Why would you say that?”

“I’m sorry, counselor I just thought--”

“You just thought what, Carisi?” He growled. “That if you bought some ridiculously expensive gift I’d suddenly realized you were ‘the one’?”

“What?!” Sonny suddenly snapped. “What the-- what the fuck are you talking about, Barba?”

“Uh I don’t know Carisi, maybe the fact that you have feelings for me?”

“What?” Rafael suddenly realized either you were wrong, or he was sticking to denial. Either way, he was probably busted.

“I bought you that briefcase because I want you to like me as a COLLEAGUE, Barba. Do you know what kind of clout you get in our field by being friends with the ADA? And-- And nothing I do ever seems to be good enough, I was afraid you’d never...accept me, unless I…”

“Bribed me?” Rafael asked softly.

“I--I don’t know, I--”

“Well,” Sonny shrugged uncomfortably. “When you say it like that it sounds dirty,”

“Right,” Rafael rubbed the back of his neck nervously.

“....But why, in the fuck--” Sonny crossed his arms now. “Would you ever accuse me of--- of that?!”

“Is it because you have feelings for me and you were hoping I felt the same way but it freaked you out when I made some ‘declaration of love’ in front of all of your work buddies?”

“WHAT?!” Rafael practically screamed. “Absolutely not--”

“I’m just gonna ask you one time, straight out,” Sonny approached Rafael, his stature over him becoming more obvious the closer he got to the ADA.

“Then why? Have I seriously given you an impression that I-- want your cannoli?” He tried to find an appropriate word. And he was genuinely asking, he had made damn sure not to act that way for so long, there was no way he had fucked that up.

“Uh...yes, yes you have,” Rafael tried to bluff. He had no idea how this situation had flipped, or if it was better for Sonny to think he had feelings for him, and not his baby cousin.

“That’s bullshit,” Sonny shook his head with a sarcastic laugh. “I have made damn sure--” He glanced at you again, he knew that look. That was the same look you had when you had broken his mom’s favorite vase and had blamed it on the dog.

“Damn sure what?” Rafael quickly tried to distract him.

“Damn sure you didn’t think that,” He answered hazily, thoughts filling his mind.

“Because you do,” Rafael tried to keep defensive.

“....This isn’t about me, this is about you,” Sonny’s eyes suddenly narrowed as he was quickly becoming aware of the glances you at Rafael were sharing.

“Ohh no I think it’s about--”

“WHY would you accuse me of trying to...seduce you?!” Sonny cut him off.

“Does that sound like something I would do, whether it was true or not?”

“So it IS--”

“DAMMIT, Rafael!” Sonny stomped his foot. He was getting bold now as the wheels started turning.

“What?” Rafael laughed like it was ridiculous, looking everywhere but Sonny’s eyes. “When would she even--”

“...Did my cousin say something to you?” His eyes were narrow, he was scowling between the two of you. Fuck. FUCK. Don’t panic. Keep your cool. Don’t move.

“When you followed her just now?” He crossed his arms again.

Whew. Well, thank God. At least that bullet was dodged.

"Was she? Because it seems like telling you was the worst thing she could do!!!" Sonny snapped.

“....She might have said something along those lines,” Rafael glanced at you with apologetic eyes as he threw you under the bus.

“Wha-- are you kidding me?!” You hissed at him, but Sonny was already fuming at you.

“Y/N!!! What the fuck is wrong with you?!” He started to stomp over to you. “You can’t just throw your assumptions at people, because you think your ‘emotionally stunted’ cousin can’t deal with some confusing feelings he has,”

“Uh…”

“Ya can’t just SHOVE someone out of a closet!” He kept yelling, oblivious to the stares he was now getting. “Especially not to my boss!!!”

“Sonny, I--”

“See I knew it!” Rafael clapped his hands together, trying to rescue you after he threw you to the sharks. “I knew you had feelings for me, I didn’t need her to tell me,”

“FINE,” Sonny threw his hands up. “Fine, Rafael. You win, okay?” He struggled with tears forming in his throat. “Yeah, I’ve had some-- weird, feelings about you. For a while,”

You and Rafael just stared at him while he “came out” to an entire restaurant.

“And alright, maybe I went a little overboard with the gift, my bad,” He shrugged. "But that doesn't excuse Y/N for telling you her conspiracy theories!"

"Carisi…" Barba sighed. "She was just trying to help."

"Y'know what YN, would you mind finding somewhere else to crash tonight, i can't really look at you right now," he sighed as he turned and walked awkwardly out of the restaurant.

"Sonny I am so--" you tried to apologize.

"Well you heard the man," He grinned, totally unphased by what just happened.

"I'm sure he'll--" his face went from a soft smile into a horrified expression.

"Are you fucking kidding me Rafael?" You scoffed at him in disbelief.

"Well at least he doesn't suspect anything between us!" He pointed out.

"Yeah just that I'm a horrible outing twat," you rolled your eyes.

"Aw carino," He pulled you into a soft comforting kiss.

"What's wrong?" You asked softly, afraid to turn around.

"How fucking DARE you say that, Barba. I'm not some fucking jealous teenager, although clearly that's your type,"

"Oh my god..." you heard Sonny's voice behind you. "Oh my God!"

You definitely didn't want to turn around now.

"Are you fucking kidding me?!" Sonny now stormed over to the two of you.

I can't fucking believe you Y/N! What the fuck is this? How did this happen?"

"Sonny I--" You tried to explain,

"And YOU--" He glared at Rafael. "You had the fucking audacity to sit there and start yelling at me for "inappropriate feelings'," he growled.

"Carisi…." Rafael put a hand up.

"What the fuck do you call seducing my baby cousin??" He snarled.

'Look Carisi I know you might be jealous, but--" Before Rafael could finish his sentence, Sonny's fist was hitting his face and he fell to the ground.

"Hey!" You exclaimed.

"This isn't about my feelings, jackass," he went to punch him again but you ran over and tried to pull him off Rafael as a crowd of spectators was forming.

"Which by the way, you have zero worry of those anymore, I'm not into perverts," he spat.

"Sonny!" You gasped. "...the hell is wrong with you?!"

"We're leaving," he instructed you.

"Like hell we are," you went to help Rafael up.

"Sonny, even if you were my dad, I'm a grown woman," you snapped. "You can't drag me out of here like a child,"

"YN," Sonny had that soft, scary, angry tone. "I practically raised you. I'm the closest thing you have to a dad. So when I say we're leaving, we're leaving."

"Either you come with me right now, or I'm disowning you," he threatened.

"Are you fucking kidding me Son?" You laughed at the absurdity of the threat.

"I'll stop paying for your classes at the community college," he threatened.

Well not only did he just threaten your academics but he embarrassed the hell out of you revealing you weren't even in a real college.

"So?" You stood your ground. "Go for it,"

"I'll stop paying your rent," He kept going.

"Well that's--" You started getting nervous.

"I'll stop payments on your car,"

"OKAY," You finally caved. You just wanted to stop revealing what a fucking sad sack you were having him pay for everything, just like a dad.

You looked at Rafael who was standing now, winding his bloody mouth with a handkerchief from a pocket in his suit.

"I'm sorry," you barely whispered with tears in your eyes and throat. The last thing You wanted to do was leave him there but as Sonny so blatantly pointed out, he basically owned you.

You gave him one last long kiss goodbye, to which Sonny made a disgusted scoff.

Rafael gave you a look of pleading, begging you to stay with him while he held onto your hand. You pulled your hand away from him and turned to Sunny

"Alright let's go Son," you said softly trying not to glance back at Rafael.

Sonny nodded triumphantly and walked out of the restaurant with you close behind, leaving Rafael alone.

[anubislover]

Welcome to the Heart Pirates, Nami-ya chapter 19: Lying Hearts

“How can anyone stand to live in a city like this?” Nami grumbled as the light glinted off of yet another painfully white building. True, the setting sun had lessened the glare slightly, but after an entire afternoon of it, she was developing quite the headache, even with the sunglasses.

Law shrugged and continued walking at a leisurely pace, still unaffected. “I’m sure if you’re born somewhere like this it’s easier, but people can learn to tolerate almost anything given enough time, I suppose.”

“Do you think you’d be able to learn to tolerate bread?”

“I said almost. I’d sooner die of starvation.”

She shook her head with a chuckle but kept pace, following his lead. Instead of heading straight back to the submarine, Law had insisted on a few detours through Atifakuto—partially in case anyone had grown suspicious and decided to follow them, but also to scope out potential escape routes under the guise of sightseeing. Nami, for her part, had been exceedingly helpful in this, mapping out in her head which stairways lead where and pointing out various places to hide. If Law found her compliance suspicious, he didn’t say anything; it was in their best interest to work together, especially with some potentially valuable goods on the line, so her behavior was easily rationalized.

For her, however, there was more than artifacts or even belli at stake. This heist had to go well. She needed Law to trust her enough to open up about why he was so obsessed with Amber Lead. Perhaps if he could do that, she wouldn’t even have to sneak into his quarters to take a look at the ledgers. She could just ask and he’d let her in like a rational human being.

Of course, in order for either of their plans to succeed they needed to know where the vase was. Luckily, the rest of the Hearts hadn’t been sitting idle on the submarine. They’d been investigating every possible gallery, art collector, museum, and auction house their prize could possibly be at. The second they had a lead, they’d call on the mini Den Den Mushi.

Until then, though, Law and Nami were forced to meander about the city, planning and killing time.

“So, while we wait for some intel, what else are you going to buy me?” she asked as they wandered the fourth level. They’d passed quite a few shops, and while most had stocked dull business suits similar to the last store, Nami felt her bags were tragically light. They were in a beautiful-if-blinding city, and she was walking away with only one outfit? What a travesty.

Snorting dismissively, Law glanced down at her with a clear look of are you kidding me? on his face. “Nothing. I told you I was only getting you one outfit. I’m your captain, not your sugar daddy.”

“You know, for a man who wants this little job to go well, you’re not putting in nearly the effort you should,” she quipped, a sly smile on her lips, eyelashes fluttering prettily. “I’m supposed to look professional and put together if I’m gonna pull off being your lovely assistant. That means I need matching shoes and accessories. Maybe a cute leather purse or briefcase to really sell it.”

“If you want those so badly then buy them yourself. Or,” he smirked, halting his pace to turn around and catch her chin between his fingers, tilting her head up towards him as he stepped in close enough so she could feel his body heat, “you earn them by doing certain favors for daddy.”

Her cheeks only pinkened a little at his innuendos while she stuck out her tongue and shoved him away. Last night’s dream wasn’t quite as close to the forefront of her mind anymore, but that didn’t mean his smirk didn’t do things to her she’d rather ignore. “Pass. You should know by now that it takes more than clothes for me to play nice.”

“Mmm, I do. That’s what makes it so much fun,” he purred, gold eyes glinting in wicked amusement. One gloved hand was shoved into his pocket while his free arm slung itself casually over her shoulder as he continued stalking along the fastidiously clean road. “But since you’re currently insisting on being a strong, independent woman who doesn’t need a man to provide for her, you can instead borrow some shoes from Ikkaku, and she might still have a pair of glasses or something from the time she pretended to be a receptionist at a Naval base.”

Brown eyes widened at his statement. Not because he was suggesting that she borrow clothes or anything, but the bombshell he’d just casually dropped in light of her recent discovery.

“Was this for one of your plans?” she asked, shoulders stiffening.

He shrugged like it was no big deal, though he did give her a curious glance at the way she tensed beneath him. “Yeah. We needed someone on the inside, and they’d put out an advertisement for an attractive female in her early twenties. It’s not like Uni or Penguin could do it.”

“But…holy shit, Law, are you serious?” she hissed, dragging him over to an unoccupied part of the street behind a solitary gated tree so she could scold him in private. There weren’t too many people about, but the last thing they need was to get unwanted attention because they’d caused a scene, even if Law totally deserved to get chewed out at the top of her lungs for being such an asshole. “Ikkaku has Marine brothers who want her dead and you sent her into the lion’s den? What the fuck?!”

Caught off-guard by her anger, Law’s eyebrows shot up briefly before furrowing. “She told you about them?”

Damn. In her shock and anger on her friend’s behalf, she’d forgotten that this was a subject she wasn’t technically supposed to know. But instead of admitting guilt, she doubled down and threw on her best poker face.

“Yeah. She told me,” she lied easily. Too easily. It came as naturally as it had back in the days she’d been working under Arlong, getting close to pirates by lying through her teeth and then robbing them blind. How many crews and captains had she deceived before Luffy? Nami had honestly lost count, but once she’d joined up with the Straw Hats, lying to a supposed ally hadn’t been quite as instinctual.

But this isn’t Luffy, and Law’s keeping way more secrets than I am, she rationalized. It’s just a little white lie anyway. He’d be way more pissed at Shachi and Penguin for telling me. I’m looking after those guys.

Law’s expression hardened, and for a moment she wondered if he’d seen through her bluff. She didn’t think she’d gotten too rusty in the lying department, but Law was smart and distrusting in general, so she couldn’t quite tell. Trepidation hung heavy in the air as she waited for him to speak, mind going a mile a minute coming up with new lies and explanations to appease him. Worse came to worst, she could throw the guys under the bus, even if she didn’t really want to, but they were his best friends, so Law would doubtlessly be more forgiving towards them, right?

Thankfully, it seemed his anger came from a completely different place, as he snarled quietly through clenched teeth, “Nami-ya, I am, as you have pointed out rather frequently in the past, a control freak. Do you really think I would devise a plan that required sending my top mechanic into a Marine base if there was even a chance she could be recognized? Especially by her utter shit of a brother?”

She flinched at the vitriol in his voice. It seemed she’d touched a nerve, and unless she wanted to lose all the progress she’d worked for, she knew it was best to back down. “Sorry. You’re right.”

“I’ll accept your apology if you tell me what prompted her to tell you,” he stated, crossing his arms. “It’s not information she makes widely known, even to those who are permanent members of my crew.”

Well. At least this was easy enough to justify, and she’d be doing both Law and Ikkaku a favor, right? Sure, the guys would obviously tell him later, but being the first to warn him might earn her a few more crumbs of trust. “There was an article in the paper about Marine reinforcements coming to the Grand Line. Ushi was interviewed. He seemed pretty intent on taking down the Heart Pirates.”

Law froze, his frown deepening into a dark sneer. The tic in his jaw and the way his fists clenched reminded her of his reaction to Ikkaku having been attacked on Grimm. “That fucker will stay away from Ikkaku if he’s got any brains in him.”

“You’re pretty protective of her,” she said. Sure, he’d perhaps phrased his defense in a way that implied his priority was the plan, it was clear from the hiss in his voice that Ikkaku’s safety had been genuinely considered.

The brim of his hat hid his eyes as he stated, “I’m protective of all my crew. She’s just…it’s hard to find submarine engineers, let alone ones as skilled as her. Ikkaku’s hard to replace.”

Well that stinks to high heaven of bullshit, she thought. Sure, the Surgeon of Death had a rightly-earned cruel reputation, but he’d shown time and again his crew meant a lot to him. Stepping in close, she used her finger to lift his hat enough to see his expression unobstructed. “Is that why you let her sass you? Because if she walked you’d be dead in the water?”

The gold orbs glared down at her, though the held no heat. “Everyone on the crew is a vital component. Like gears in a well-oiled machine. You’ve gotta take care of them to make sure they don’t break.”

When Nami merely raised a disbelieving eyebrow, he sighed, body deflating slightly. “Look, Nami-ya, everyone on my crew, we’ve all got shit in our pasts. Some have overcome it. Some still carry the scars. Ikkaku…hers is one of the few that’s actively still trying to get her. So yeah, maybe I’m a bit more protective, but it’s for a damn good reason.”

Ok, now that was a fair point. “I’m surprised you haven’t just killed him.”

“Oh, I want to,” he snarled. “No brother should try to hurt their siblings. They’re supposed to look after them. The only reason Ushi-ya still draws breath is because Ikkaku begged me to spare his pathetic life.”

It suddenly dawned on Nami that, despite his criticizing Luffy for not being more bloodthirsty, Law was…surprisingly merciful in his own ways, too. He didn’t murder Ikkaku’s brother, despite having clear reason to, just because she asked. He rescued Jean Bart from a life of slavery despite not knowing him. And while she didn’t fully understand the Ope Ope no Mi’s powers, she wondered if his cuts didn’t draw blood because he didn’t want them to?

She wasn’t sure if he had a complexity addiction or if he genuinely wanted to minimize bloodshed, but once again another side of the incredibly fascinating man had been revealed.

Taking a deep breath to calm his anger, he gave Nami a sadistic smile. “Doesn’t mean I let him off the hook with a sternly-worded warning, though. Wanna know what I did to him the last time we met?”

Nami turned a bit green as she remembered Jinzo’s still-beating heart in his hands. Complex and caring towards his crew or not, he was still a twisted bastard. “Fuck no!”

Briefly he pouted at not getting to regale her with the gory details before shrugging. “Pity. It was quite the eventful evening. In fact, it was also the night of mine and Drake-ya’s first kiss.”

“How the hell are those two things connected?!”

“Well, I had to distract him somehow. He was guarding my poor mechanic like a dragon would a virtuous princess.”

Before she could demand more details, or even snort at the idea of Ikkaku being virtuous, the sound of the mini Den Den Mushi reached their ears, interrupting the conversation.

Looking around to make sure there weren’t any eavesdroppers, Law pulled out the little snail phone and clicked down on the top. “Guessing you’ve got something for me?”

“I do,” the snail answered, and Nami recognized the faint accent that indicated they were speaking to Cousteau. “Only one place that specializes in North Blue history. Jubilee & Atlas Antiques. It’s an auction house and gallery on the fifth level, a block away from the Elevate Deliverer Restoration Church.”

“Well that’s a needlessly long name,” he quipped, rolling his eyes. Mentally, Nami had to agree, though it also sounded vaguely familiar. “At least that makes it easier to find. Anything else I should know? Other landmarks, nearby guard stations, that sort of thing?”

There was a moment of hesitation before Cousteau replied, “No station, though there would probably be at least a few guards wandering around at night. It’s, uh, right by a fountain. Blessings from the White City.”

Nami’s eyes widened a little. Oh. Now she remembered. That had been the church with the huge stained-glass windows. The one in her book, by the tribute to Flevance.

“…I see.”

The little snail chewed its lip, clearly concerned. “Captain, if you want, I can do all the surveillance—”

“It’s fine,” he cut in, tone sharp before smoothing out, “I saw it earlier. In fact, I’m glad it’s so close. Nami-ya and I will check out the gallery. We’re nearby and I’d rather see it with my own eyes to get the lay of the land. Unless anyone else has a better lead, you and the others can head back to the ship.”

“Understood, sir. Anything else you need?” he asked, sounding relieved.

“Just tell Clione I might have a job for him later on, so don’t make any evening plans.”

“Aye-aye, Captain.”

The call ended, and Nami peered up at Law, expecting signs of the same darkness that had crossed his face when they’d visited the fountain earlier. Instead, his face was totally blank, staring down at the tiny snail, expressionless.

Somehow, that was far, far more unnerving.

“Law?” she asked, touching his arm hesitantly.

As if awoken from a trance he shook his head before smirking down at her. “Well, hope you don’t mind one last detour before heading back to the ship? I know it’s more stairs but look on the bright side; at this rate, the definition of your calf muscles will be a thing of beauty.”

He didn’t wait for her to respond, turning on his heels and heading towards the direction of the stairs to the next level. Frowning, she began to doubt whether or not this was all a good idea. She didn’t know exactly what his deal was, but she really felt like he was too close to this. But she had the feeling trying to talk him out of it would be an exercise in futility, and would set her back far more than any lie she might spin.

Oh well, she sighed internally, jogging to catch up, so long as he doesn’t do anything stupid. He’s sensible enough to keep a cool head, no matter what his problem is. It’ll be fine.

While it wasn’t far, it took longer than either of them would have expected to actually find Jubilee & Atlas Antiques. Mainly because it was a surprisingly nondescript building compared to the opulent churches and museums nearby. Honestly, based on the exterior, one could easily have passed it by. Like everything else the building was pristinely white, the windows boasting small arches over them and flower boxes containing white impatiens. Really, the most impressive thing about it was the marble plaque out front boasting the company’s name in gold leaf.

But the two pirates didn’t really care about the appearance; it was what was inside that counted. That, and the information board out front, which stated in bold, black letters that there would be a showing and auction of North Blue artworks at 8pm that evening.

“Why don’t you just Scan the place, grab the vase, and walk away? Seems like that would be easy compared to putting on this charade?” Nami asked, eyeing the building. It was hardly Harpin’s mansion; it would take almost no effort for Law to use his powers to steal every item of value inside it, replacing artifacts, paintings, and money with pebbles and potted plants with a mere flick of his fingers, then teleporting them away to safety.

Really, if he weren’t such an ass, Trafalgar Law would be a thief’s dream partner.

Of course, he was an ass, so he gave her a look that implied he considered her question to be phenomenally stupid. “Because there’s no guarantee that the vase is even in there—for all I know it’s being kept in a secondary location until the actual event for security or health reasons. It is a relic from a city that suffered a notorious death toll both before and after the World Government had quarantined it,” he explained lowly. “On top of that, my Room would draw too much attention, so if it’s not in there, we’ll have blown our whole cover and probably the operation.”

Though disappointed that they couldn’t just whisk it away with his powers, she conceded that he had a point. Versatile and useful as they were, the Ope Ope no Mi’s abilities did have their drawbacks. Actually infiltrating the auction house was a safer move.

Yet for a moment, she saw Law glare at the building, as if he were equally frustrated that they couldn’t just grab their prize and go. Perhaps even a great mastermind like him sometimes wished to take the direct path. “At least we can be sure it’ll be presented at this auction,” he reassured, almost as much to himself as her as his hand rested on Nami’s lower back while he escorted her away. “Makes it easier to come up with a plan and contingencies when I actually know the target. My crew did good.”

She twirled a strand of hair around her finger in thought. She supposed he was right, and the pride in his voice when he mentioned the Hearts’ contribution…well, she knew better than to argue with that. Seemed the lesson he learned on the last island was sticking. “Still too bad we don’t have blueprints like Harpin’s house, though.”

“It can’t be helped. That was a job I’d been planning for months. This is more…spontaneous. Why? Scared and looking to back out?” he asked, glancing down at her with a challenging grin.

Nami scoffed. She was a thief that specialized in robbing pirates. Sure, she was a scaredy-cat, but when treasure of some kind was at stake, there were few risks she wouldn’t take. “Not a chance. Just pointing out that we’re going in more blind than last time.”

“Maybe, but at least our prize will be out in the open and not in the home of a former Marine with tentacles. Hell, we might even get it legally.”

“Law,” she started, brow furrowing. She wasn’t scared, but she did have a reasonable concern, especially with how intent he seemed on this one item. “What are we going to do if we don’t win the vase?”

The pair stopped by the Flevance fountain, Law taking a long moment to stare solemnly at the beautiful white angels. Without a word he reached into his pocket and pulled out a small coin, pressing it to his lips before flipping it into the water.

When he turned back to her, his gold eyes were as hard as the statues’ and twice as cold.

“Simple; we take it from whoever did.”

XXX

Hidden in a small cove on an unpopulated section of Atifakuto’s coast, the sight of the Polar Tang’s sunny yellow hull was a welcome relief after a whole day of the city’s stark white walls. Law seemed to agree as his tense posture relaxed into a comfortable slouch, even giving a few of the guys a small grin when they called out to them. To Nami, of course, the submarine was still far from the Sunny and thus would never be home, but she couldn’t help but smile at Law’s reaction. The Dark Doctor really did have some softness deep down.

Of course, that didn’t last long, as the moment they were within the safety of the cargo bay he was once more all business. “Dinner is in an hour. Rest up, brush up on your notes, do whatever you need to prepare for the auction tonight; I’ve got a few more dominoes to put in place,” Law stated. He’d been silent for most of the walk back, though Nami attributed that to him mentally filing through all the information they now had and formulating his plan. Much as she missed and loved Luffy, having a captain who didn’t just go rushing in like an idiot was a nice change of pace.

That didn’t mean she appreciated his tone, though. “Say please,” she quipped, hip jutting out. She might have decided to be more compliant for the sake of gaining his trust, but that didn’t mean she was going to let him boss her around.

Besides, if she were too accommodating, he’d probably grow suspicious and then she’d be right back at square one.

He scowled but apparently decided it would be a waste of time to argue. They were on a tight schedule, after all, so her attitude would have to be tolerated. For now. “Please,” he grumbled before marching off, beckoning Clione to follow him. The biologist glanced between the two, bewildered, but smartly said nothing before chasing after his captain.

Flashing a self-satisfied grin at Law’s retreating back, Nami practically skipped to her quarters. Even though they weren’t as prepared as she’d like, so far, things were going well. Perhaps they couldn’t just use Law’s powers to swipe the vase, but by obtaining it through legal means, they wouldn’t have the authorities after them, which would be nice. Besides, it wasn’t her money that would be spent at the auction.

Her research of the North Blue had taught her a few things, including just how valuable things from Flevance were. After all, things made from the white ore had been in high-demand during the city’s heyday; now that it was in ruins, any remaining artifacts would surely triple in price. And, admittedly, if that fountain had been anything to go by, the vase could very well be extremely beautiful. Something any art collector or historian might want for themselves.

Once more, she wondered why the hell Law wanted it. He collected coins, not art, so she doubted it would be something he wanted just for the heck of it. What was his obsession with Flevance—

That train of thought was derailed when Nami walked into her room. She blinked then rubbed her eyes, certain her vision was still messed up from the sun, because Ikkaku was still sitting at her desk, working on some little device, practically in the same position as that morning. Really, the only difference was the lack of towel around her head, though her curly hair was a tangled bird’s nest.

“Have you even moved today?” Nami exclaimed loudly, flabbergasted.

The mechanic jumped a few inches out of her chair, a pen cartwheeling through the air before falling back onto the surface of the desk with a clatter. Apparently since she’d had the room to herself, she hadn’t felt the need to put the earplugs back in, leaving her vulnerable to Nami’s loud voice. “Damn, girl, you scared me,” Ikkaku said with a breathy laugh. She glanced around, noticing the time on the clock and the fact that her hair had dried completely. “Guess I was in the zone.”

“You haven’t been working all day, have you?” Nami asked, plopping her shopping bag on her bed. “At least tell me you had lunch.”

“Sounding an awful lot like Law there,” she teased, pushing away from her desk to stretch. There was an audible pop from her back, and her dark eyes closed in relief. “Like me, too. The boys and I are always bugging a certain workaholic captain to eat something and not subsist solely on coffee and aspirin. But to answer your question, yes, I did have lunch.” She pointed at an empty plate that had been shoved into the far corner of the desk, a few grains of rice stuck to the surface. “Bepo brought me some onigiri.”

“Good. If you didn’t, I’d be dragging you into the galley and force-feeding you a sandwich, then charging you a cooking and inconvenience fee.”

Snorting, Ikkaku cracked her knuckles and rolled her shoulders, further releasing the tension sitting hunched over in one spot for hours had built up. “Dinner’s soon enough; even if I hadn’t eaten, I could have waited. And good luck making a sandwich with no bread on board.” Despite her dismissal tone, though, she gave a wry grin. “But thanks for caring, I guess, even if it does come with a price tag.”

“What are friends for?” Nami shrugged with a smile that was a little forced. It was such an alien feeling, this sudden awkwardness. Since first arriving on the Tang, she and Ikkaku had gotten on like a house on fire. It was almost inevitable, being the two women on the ship surrounded by men dealing with that insanity together. Hell, even if that hadn’t been the case, Ikkaku had practically sacrificed herself for her back at the club on Grimm. A companion like that was more than she’d even dared to dream of before she’d met Luffy.

Was it really right for Nami to act like she didn’t know about her brother? Should she just tell her that the guys told her about Ushi? Really, what was the point of keeping it a secret? It wasn’t that Nami thought she’d slip up and spill the beans—lying was her specialty, after all—but Ikkaku wasn’t some mark or stranger. She was her friend.

Hell, even if they were on opposite crews, she’d even dare to call her nakama.

The issue resolved itself, however, when the other woman’s expression turned a little melancholy. Ikkaku sighed as she rested her cheek on her fist, her other hand idly playing with the pen. “Heh. Funny, I used to ask myself that question a lot when I was younger. I didn’t really have friends back on my home island. I lived with my Gramps in a lighthouse, so besides the occasional trip to town, it was a pretty isolated life.”

“What about your brothers?” Nami asked, masking her interest by taking her purchases out of the bag so they wouldn’t wrinkle before the auction. A swell of relief surged through her. If Ikkaku talked about Ushi herself, the whole charade of pretending not to know about him wouldn’t even be necessary! She just had to carefully press for the right crumbs of information, maybe even offer up a couple tidbits about her own life in exchange. No big deal. Tit for tat, right? “Nojiko was my best friend growing up. Hell, probably my only friend until Luffy came along.”

A dark look crossed Ikkaku’s face. “Yeah, well, Nojiko on her worst day was probably a way better sibling than all of them combined.”

“I don’t think you’ve talked about them much. I basically just know that they exist and said you wouldn’t really make it as an engineer because you’re a girl.”

A long sigh escaped her lips. “That’s…the nice version. Didn’t want to unload my shitty childhood on you, especially since yours sounded worse. I mean, my island was never taken over by pirates, and I didn’t work for the guy who murdered my mom.”

Well, that was certainly true, but then again, people with healthy, normal childhoods seldom became pirates. Or at least, those that did rarely lasted long on such cutthroat seas. Nami should have realized there was more to the mechanic’s past than some run-of-the-mill misogyny. “Maybe, but I don’t mind. We’ve all gone through some rough shit, right? We wouldn’t be in this line of work otherwise.”

“True. I just…I guess I just like to pretend he doesn’t exist most of the time.”

“He?” she asked as if she didn’t already know.

Ikkaku’s calloused hand dropped the pen to instead clench into a tight fist, and there was a haunted look in her dark eyes as she stared off into space. “Ushi. He’s the oldest. I can’t remember a time when I wasn’t afraid of him. Spent our childhood making our other brothers use me as a punching bag. When he wasn’t doing that, he gave me almost hourly reminders that I was a burden on the family, that no one really loved me, that I’d never amount to anything.” There was a hitch in her breath and a pause, and Nami noticed her close her eyes tightly for a moment. As if she were fighting back tears. It was a look she’d never expected to see on the tough, vibrant woman’s face. “Then, when I was seven, he tried to kill me.”

“What?!” Nami exclaimed, dropping her blazer to the floor in shock.

“Yeah. Joras had a huge fucking forest, and he led me into it to look for mushrooms or some shit. Can’t remember. Next thing I know, he’s shoved me into a pit, and by the time I’d climbed out, he was long gone and it was night. I think…I think it was supposed to be my grave, ‘cause it was really fucking deep. Or at least it seemed that way. Maybe I’m misremembering.”

Somehow, Nami doubted that. Sure, memories could get warped with age and fear, but some details remained solid for the rest of a person’s life. “But, you got out, right? And I’m sure your parents must have been worried sick!” She could almost picture it. A young Ikkaku, sticks and leaves caught in her messy curls, knees and elbows scraped, face covered in dirt and tears, frightened but once more able to smile when she was finally found, her mother and father scooping her into their arms, scolding her for worrying them but just so relieved she was safe…

At least, that’s what Bellemere or Mister Genzo would have done if Nami had gone missing.

From the bitter laugh that escaped her throat, Ikkaku hadn’t been so fortunate. “I spent three days wandering around those fucking woods, scared and cold and wondering if I was gonna die out there. My parents didn’t even notice I was gone.” After a long moment of silence, her fist unclenched and some of the tension eased out of her shoulders. “Gramps found me, though. When I didn’t come home after two days and a storm rolled in, my brothers Nausagi and Fukuro ran two miles to the lighthouse to tell him what Ushi had done. Maybe they realized he’d gone too far. Or they were scared I’d come back as a vengeful zombie. Either way, Gramps rescued me and demanded custody. Mama and Pops were glad to hand me over. One less mouth to feed, and I wouldn’t be causing their Future Marine Hero any more trouble.”

“That’s…that’s horrible.” And yet Nami could tell she was getting the abridged version of the story. “Tell me your grandfather was a better guardian.”

Despite the childhood trauma she’d just confessed to, Ikkaku merely shrugged, a small grin tugging at the corner of her lips. “Yeah. He was. Gramps was crazy, but he loved me and taught me how to fight. Told me to never lose my smile, ‘cause that’s my best protection against a world that’ll try to break me.”

“Bellemere said something similar to me and Nojiko. ‘Whatever happens, never lose your ability to laugh. If you can survive, happy times, lots of ‘em, will come your way’.”

“Smart lady.” She tried to casually run her fingers through her hair, only to find them caught in the tangled knots. She let out a light chuckle at her predicament and added, “I think she and Gramps would have gotten along pretty well. Well, assuming she liked salty former smugglers who had the gumption to threaten Law with a shot gun. Not that he didn’t deserve it a little.”

Nami had to smile at that, and she could only imagine what he’d said that had nearly gotten him shot. It was definitely something snarky, a shit-eating grin on his face while he provoked a protective grandfather just because he could.

Noticing Ikkaku’s hair situation, she abandoned her suit to instead pick up a wide-toothed comb. “Well, I’m not sure about Bellmere, but I’d certainly love to meet him.”

“Of course you would.” Leaning back in the chair, she allowed Nami to carefully put her thick curls to rights. “How was shopping? Boss show you the blinding sights of the city?”

“It was…enlightening,” she said cautiously. There was still so much to sort out, and every time she thought she had an answer to one of her questions, four more popped up in its place.

Grabbing the pen she’d been playing with earlier, Ikkaku handed it to her over her shoulder. “Here; I made you something, since I doubt you’ll be able to bring your Clima-Tact with you. Kinda why I was so focused—I wanted it to be ready by tonight.”

Curious, Nami inspected the item. It was a plain black ballpoint pen maybe a bit longer than her hand. There was an almost unnoticeable jolly roger engraved into the middle, and she ran her thumb over it idly. “You spent the whole afternoon making me a pen? I could have just as easily brought my stylus.”

“Oh, but a stylus is only good for writing. This is so much more useful. ‘The pen is mightier than the sword’, right? Click the top.”

She did so, and instead of an ink-filled nub, a small syringe, similar to an epi-pen, popped out. Her eyes widened in realization as Ikkaku explained, “Inside’s a powerful tranquilizer. Should knock any fool out in minutes if injected into the bloodstream. Takes longer if it’s ingested. It’s non-lethal to humans, so it should be safe to use on anyone you’re looking to knock out. Assuming they aren’t really Fishmen in disguise.”

“Why? Does it react differently for them?”

She grimaced. “Yeah. Severe allergic reaction. Anaphylactic shock typically. So, unless you want that on your conscience, humans only.”

Tucking the pen away for later, Nami nodded in understanding and went back to combing her hair. “Gotcha. Doubt it’ll be a problem, though. Jean Bart said this place is pretty humans-only.”

“Doesn’t mean it’s impossible for someone to have that kind of bloodline. If it’s diluted through a few generations, a lot of the time you can hide it and pass for human.”

“Hmmm, hadn’t thought of that.”

There was a moment where Nami could tell she was mulling something over. Even faced away from her, Ikkaku wasn’t hard to read, and it was only a matter of time before she voiced whatever question was on her mind.

While she waited, the ginger took the time to appreciate the texture of Ikkaku’s hair, combing out each curl individually so it wouldn’t frizz. The thick, black locks were coarser than her own, yet surprisingly soft despite her hard life at sea. Hair maintenance was extremely difficult living on the ocean, the salt and fluctuating weather of the Grand Line wreaking havoc on Nami’s much finer strands. And while Ikkaku was far more feminine than one would expect upon first meeting her, in the time they’d roomed together, she didn’t seem to put much more extensive care into her shiny locks than some leave-in conditioner.

Guess she’s just got some good genetics, Nami thought appreciatively. Either that or she’s hiding some amazing shampoo formula, and damn if she is I’ll never forgive her!

When Ikkaku at last broke her silence, the hesitation in her voice was palpable. “Hey, it was a Fishman who held you prisoner all those years, right? You ever…blame all Fishmen for what he did?”

It was an unexpected question, but a fair one, Nami supposed. Arlong had committed a crime so heinous she knew she’d never forgive him, and she knew there were plenty of people, especially ones who spent years abused by such a monster, who would project that hatred onto an entire race. But why even ask?

“I…not really. I mean, I can’t say I never lumped them all together in my head, since Arlong and his crew were my only baseline for Fishmen for a long time.” She bit her lip, thinking. “But that was when I was a kid. My view of things was a lot more black-and-white, mostly because I was bitter at my situation. As I got older, and the more I thought about it, the more I realized that it was stupid to think all Fishmen were like him. He was the one who hurt me, so he’s the only one who should get my hate.”

“So, you don’t hate them all?”

She shook her head. “Nah. Hell, I was even able to forgive a member of his crew. I’m sure you heard about how Luffy punched a Celestial Dragon?”

Ikkaku craned her neck up to look at her, dark eyes widening in shocked understanding. “Yeah? You saying the Fishman he defended—”

“One of Arlong’s crew. Hatchi. Like all of them, he hurt me too, but it was on his captain’s orders, and he clearly regretted it.” Well, it had been a bit more complex than that. Hell, when they’d first encountered him again, she’d nearly gone back on her promise to Camie to rescue him. Even if he hadn’t abused her like the others, he’d still been complacent in it. Still destroyed villagers homes, held her hostage, attacked the Navy ships that tried to come to the rescue. He hadn’t been blameless in the least. She would have had every right to demand that he be left to be killed or enslaved. That it was karma come to bite him in the ass.

Yet what had swayed her, apart from Camie’s determination to save him, was her own friends’ reactions to seeing him again. Those who knew her past had immediately been ready to turn the ship around and leave Hatchi to his fate. Of course she’d expected Sanji to be her knight in shining armor and want nothing to do with someone who had abused a lady, even by proxy. Zoro and Usopp had been a bit more surprising, though perhaps it shouldn’t have been. They knew what she’d been put through. Had fought and bled for her. Despite their sometimes heated disagreements, Nami knew she could count on them to always have her back.

The one who shocked her the most was Luffy. He might have flip-flopped between reason and his stomach, but the fact was, her loving, forgiving captain had actually held a grudge on her behalf. Hatchi and Arlong hadn’t done anything to him personally, but his nakama had suffered, and that wasn’t something he’d easily set aside. That genuine show of solidarity and loyalty to her had melted what ice had still been around her heart, which allowed her to truly forgive the octopus Fishman.

Yes, Hatchi had hurt her, but her hatred was solely reserved for Arlong, not his underlings who genuinely felt remorse.

“I’m not a saint or anything but hating Hatchi…it seemed pointless. He wasn’t the one who killed my mother. And blaming all Fishmen for the actions of one seemed pretty shitty. Doesn’t mean I wouldn’t kill Arlong if I had the chance, though.”

Nami could practically feel the tension drain from Ikkaku’s shoulders, and she couldn’t hide her smile before she looked away. “That’s good to know. That asshole deserves it, from what you’ve told me. He and my brother should meet, then get sacrificed to some kind of horrible sea monster. Plenty of hungry Sea Kings out there to feed.”

“Couldn’t happen to a nicer pair of guys,” Nami giggled as she ran the comb through the last strand of hair. “Though, that might be cruel to the Sea King. Poor thing deserves a better meal than shit like them.”

“True. We’ll just have to think of something else then. We can ask Law; he’s always got great suggestions.”

A shudder ran down her spine, though she had to admit, it wasn’t as horrified as she’d like. She justified it with the fact that Arlong was scum who deserved whatever painful death the likes of Law might propose. So did Ushi, from the sounds of things. Though, Law had said Ikkaku had begged him not to kill her brother. Why? Did she still care about Ushi due to their familial ties? Or was there something else?

Maybe she just doesn’t want her brother’s death on her conscience, Nami thought, putting the comb away and proceeding to raid the closet for shoes. I just hope that doesn’t come back to bite her someday.

XXX

Dinner on the Tang was certainly livelier and noisier than breakfast. Mainly because the crew didn’t have to walk on eggshells while waiting for Law to get his caffeine hit. Most of the time about a dozen different conversations could be heard, utensils clattered against plates, insults were tossed about, and laughter filled the air. But at the moment, the whole galley was silent save for Nami, who was telling the Heart Pirates—save for a few who’d been sent out on last-minute errands—all about her crew’s wild adventure on Skypiea.

“…so, after Luffy beat the crap out of him, Enel flew off to the moon in his gold airship, and we escaped the island with the help of an octopus balloon, our ship loaded with treasure!”

There was a pregnant pause as the Hearts stared at her in a mix of awe and disbelief. She’d had their undivided attention ever since Law announced that the Straw Hats had found Noland’s lost city of gold, all but demanding she tell the tale and not skimp on the details.

Naturally, those details made the story even more bizarre, practically unbelievable, but she gave them what they asked for, so they couldn’t complain. Even Law’s jaw had dropped once or twice in incredulity. Mostly at the part where Luffy’d been eaten by a giant snake and thus been hidden from Enel’s senses.

Finally, a few of the crew managed to find their voices.

“An orangutan nearly wrecked your ship with singing?” Shachi asked, face utterly baffled.

Penguin grabbed his hat and smacked him over the head with it. “That’s what you’re stuck on? That’s from way back in the beginning of the story!”

The ginger punched him in the shoulder in retaliation, which quickly devolved into a childish slap fight. “Well it’s weird, ok?”

“Weirder than Straw Hat punching Kami or the knock-up stream business or the ship that flew to the moon?”

“Yeah! You ever met an orangutan that could sing?!”

“No, but that’s not the point!”

“You met Monte Blac Cricket?” Ermine interrupted, eyes so wide the whites could be seen even under the rim of their hat, though their mouth quickly split into a smile. “Holy shit, I’d wondered what had happened to him!”

“Wasn’t he your friend or something?” Seiuchi asked through a mouth full of rice.

They shook their head, looking a little wistful, a faint blush rising to their cheeks. “Just a neighbor. The people of Lvneel were dicks to his family and anyone who associated with them didn’t get treated much better. But I always thought there had to be some truth to Noland’s story.”

“Because a city of gold is so fantastical it’s gotta be real?” Nami asked, amused. She’d half-expected everyone to laugh at her like the people on Jaya when she’d asked about Sky Island—she’d even glossed over that part, finding no reason to recap such a blow to her pride. Yet instead, they’d been respectful, even entranced by her tale. It seemed to help that she’d been able to fill in a few blanks with what she remembered from Noland’s ledger, thus adding credibility to the man himself instead of just imagining the lying fool the king’s slander had reduced him to.

Usopp would probably love these guys, she thought fondly. Not that they’d likely believe his fantastical lies, but they’d probably at least let him spin his yarns to his heart’s content.

“Because you don’t tell a king about a city of gold unless you’ve got something to show for it,” Uni interjected wisely, ladling some more curry onto her plate. He paused to smile at her with his eyes, the bottom half of his face still distinctly covered by his bandana despite it being dinnertime. This close, Nami couldn’t help but try to subtly look for signs of scarring, and in fact could spot a line of slightly-paler skin peeking out just over the edge. “That, and history’s rarely all that accurate. Full of lies and twisted to suit a certain narrative.”

“That’s the World Government way. I’m sure we’ll see plenty of it tonight,” Law stated, leaning back in his chair as he munched on some onigiri. The bulge in his cheek might have been comical, but the glint in his eye was humorless. “Can’t wait to hear the dumbass assumptions people make about us Northerners.”

Murmurs of agreement echoed throughout the room, though an angry tic formed on Nami’s forehead.

“Are you saying the stuff you had me study is going to be a load of crap?” she demanded, pointing her finger accusingly. Of course she knew history was skewed at best, but she’d spent days cramming! Had weird sexual dreams about him because of it!

Yes she was blaming the book for that and no one could stop her.

He shrugged and took another bite of rice, unbothered by her irritation. “It’s the information you’ll need to be able to regurgitate if anyone asks you about the North.”

“Yeah,” Penguin chimed in, nodding sagely. He and Shachi had finally been pulled apart by Jean Bart and had resumed eating like nothing had happened. “These people aren’t interested in the truth. They just want to feel superior to the ‘uneducated masses’.”

“Buncha pretentious pricks,” Shachi sniggered, balancing a spoon on his upper lip. “Bet they’d have a fucking fit if they found out El Dorodo’s not only real, but in the fucking sky!”

“I mean, can’t say I’d blame them,” Jude grumbled, playing a bit with his food like a grumpy child. “I figured we’d be the ones to find it, but this whole time we’ve been sailing around in a submarine for nothing!”

“You got something to say about my ship?” Ikkaku snapped, glaring at her crewmate. Behind her, Crozier, Cousteau, and Ermine made slashing motions across their throats, silently reminding him that disparaging the Polar Tang in any way in front of its chief engineer was a sure death sentence.

Before he could say anything, Uni thwapped him on the forehead with the spoon, apparently taking just as much offense. “How can you say it’s been for nothing—we’ve found tons of cool shit down here! May not have been El Dorado, but there have been some amazing sunken cities. And fish! We’ve discovered more aquatic animals than any other ocean explorer,” he pointed out excitedly, Cousteau nodding in agreement. “I mean, we’ve seen deep-sea fish not recorded in any book! Extracted hallucinogenic venom from puffer fish! Taken samples of bioluminescent plankton! We’ve seen octopi punch fish!”

“You ever figure out why they do that?” Shachi asked, cocking his head.

“Best I can figure? Spite.”

As weird as this little tangent was, Nami found herself giggling a bit at how excited Uni was. She didn’t know him too well, given how he was one of the quieter, more reserved members of the crew, but it was endearing to see him so animated and giddy as he discussed marine life.

“Plus, it’s cool to study navigational currents and everything, and underwater topography. The maps I can make from that kind of intel are really good,” Bepo added, twiddling his claws a bit beside her.

“Right! And if that’s still not enough to convince you, who needs a city of gold when you can get your hands on more sunken treasure than most pirates see in their lifetimes?” Uni asked, puffing out his chest.

She couldn’t help it—Nami’s eyes lit up with belli signs at the thought of how many sunken ships the submarine probably came across, all that gold theirs for the taking. Most treasure was basically lost once it hit the bottom of the ocean, but the Hearts’ ship and diving equipment turned the ocean floor into their personal piggy bank.

It seemed Jude had the same thought. “You’re right, you’re right,” he conceded, rubbing the back of his neck. “Sorry, it’s a great ship, and we’ve definitely found more than a city’s worth of loot—and yes the fish are cool Uni put the spoon away—but it’s still annoying to find out that we’ve been searching the wrong place this whole time.”

“Eh, happens to every pirate crew,” Jean Bart said, sipping his drink. “You find a treasure map only to discover the gold’s already dug up. Same with legends of lost cities. The fact that the Straw Hats actually found El Dorado and came away with a profit just means they’ve got the Devil’s luck on their side.”

“Or the favor of some god. Probably not that Enel guy, though,” Shachi said with a smirk. “And hopefully nothing from Joras, either.”

There was a murmur of agreement among the crew at that, though Ikkaku looked more uncomfortable than amused. Nami wasn’t the only one to catch that, though, as Uni reproachfully smacked the side of his head with the spoon.

“Dude. Don’t joke about the eldritch horror gods, yeah?”

“Sorry,” the ginger said, blushing slightly as he wiped away the curry splattered across his face.

“Eldritch horror gods?” Nami asked, recoiling at the thought. What the fuck?! Joras sounded vaguely familiar and given the context she guessed it had to be someplace in the North Blue, but she sure as hell didn’t recall reading anything about that! Was this something related to Northern culture, or were the guys just fucking with her?

“Nothing to worry your pretty little head over, Nami-ya,” Law stated with a smirk, though she didn’t miss the glare he sent Shachi’s way. “We’ve been sailing under the ocean for over five years and I’ve yet to see a sleeping god who can turn you mad with terror.”

“No, just an underwater ruin or two that talks about him,” Ikkaku muttered, picking at her food.

Underwater ruins with tales of sleeping gods? Sounds like something Robin would be interested in, Nami thought, nervous sweat running down her neck. Not that she’d be able to blame her. Sure, the archeologist was macabre as hell, but Nami could appreciate her thirst for knowledge, creepy or not. Who knew what history and cultures had been lost to the seas? Maybe there were even Poneglyphs down at the bottom of the ocean!

Damn. Robin and Law would probably get along great. She wasn’t sure if she was frightened or comforted by this thought.

Uni seemed to notice her unease and patted her shoulder. “We’ve seen some strange stuff down there, but nothing more dangerous than Sea Kings. Which, I mean, aren’t exactly friendly guppies, but they’ll leave us be. The Tang’s Seastone coating and electrical defenses ensure that.”

Though she still found the whole concept horrifying, she was appreciated how hard Uni was trying to keep the peace and not make things needlessly frightening for her. The whole crew had a morbid sense of humor, but while she’d mostly adapted, she still found this whole conversation creepy. It made her feel a little guilty for wanting to pry into his business. Yeah, it was annoying to know the crew was hiding stuff from her, but Uni deserved a little privacy, right?

“Yeah, and if there were anything more, Uni’s fish buddies would warn us ahead of time!” Malamute added.

“Fish buddies?” Nami asked, eyebrows lifting to her hairline in surprise. So much for respecting his privacy. “Wait, can you talk to fish?”

The man in question stiffened beside her. “I, uh, I can understand fish a little,” he said, looking nervous. His large hands twisted the napkin in his lap, and he refused to look at her. “It’s a Haki thing.”

“Haki can do that?” she asked, surprised.

“Observation Haki can do a lot of things, and Uni’s the best at it on the ship,” Law cut in harshly, glare brokering no argument. “It’s a skill that’s saved our asses plenty of times.”

Nami blanched at his defensive tone. “Hey, I’ll take your word for it, but you don’t have to act like I insulted his mother or something.”

“It’s ok, Law,” Uni said, shrugging a bit, though his face seemed to sink a little further into his bandana. “I know she didn’t mean anything by it. It’s a fair question, and it is a weird talent.”

“It’s not weird. It’s fucking useful as hell and I won’t hear anyone belittling my crew.”

“I’d never belittle him—” Nami snapped, starting to stand up to give Law a piece of her mind before Bepo’s heavy paws fell on her shoulders, gently but firmly keeping her seated.

“I’m sorry,” he apologized softly. “Law doesn’t mean you. It’s just…the last person outside the crew that found out, he was extremely cruel about it. Beat Uni to a pulp and even threatened to sell him as a freak show attraction before Captain found them.”

“Oh my god,” she replied, anger cooling quickly as she covered her mouth in horror, imagining Uni bruised and bloody on the ground at the hands of some bastard. Well, that would sure as hell explain why Law had taken such offense. If such a thing had happened to Chopper because he could speak to animals, she’d likely be just as pissed. From the scowls on the rest of the Hearts’ faces, the whole crew felt similar. Her gaze flicked to the fuming captain. “I’m guessing he ended up on your operating table?”

“I wish,” he growled, gold eyes glinting in fury as he crossed his arms. “Marines showed up before I could cut out his heart. Must have been his lucky day, but luck won’t be enough to save him if I ever run into Hyena-ya again.”

“Hyena?” she asked, the name not ringing any bells.

“Bellamy the Hyena,” Bepo explained, snout wrinkling in distaste. “He’s also from the North.”

Oh. My. God, Nami thought, wondering if the world was really so small. “You said Bellamy, right? Blonde hair? Spring powers? Asshole with a stupid grin?”

Law cocked an eyebrow in mild surprise. “Seems you’ve encountered him before.”

She ground her teeth as she remembered the way he’d mocked Luffy’s dreams in the bar. “Yeah. On Jaya. His crew laughed at me for asking about Sky Island and his first mate tried to buy me. Later he stole Cricket’s gold, so Luffy went after him. I didn’t see the fight but given what an ass that guy was…yeah, Luffy wiped that stupid smile off his face.”

Once more the room fell silent, but quickly broke out into thunderous applause.

“Hah! I would have paid good money to see that!” Ikkaku laughed, spirits lifted.

“If he hurt Cricket, I’m glad he got the beating he deserved,” Ermine said with a grin.

Uni smiled, the corners of his eyes crinkling happily. “When you see Straw Hat again, shake his hand for me! That guy’s a dick.”

Even Law was put in a better mood, though there was still a malicious edge to his smirk. “Good on Mugiwara-ya. Still wouldn’t mind doing some permanent damage to the fucker myself, though. Bad enough he insulted my crew, but that bastard should pick his idols more carefully.”

Nami’s brow furrowed at that. His idols? The hell did that mean?

She didn’t have time to vocalizing that question, though. Sweat ran down her neck when said smirk then took a more lecherous edge as he rested his chin on his fist, eyes glinting with mischief. “But Sarquiss-ya tried to buy you? I might have prioritize kicking his ass, then. I’m the only one who gets to be your sugar daddy.”

“Oh shut up! You didn’t even buy me new shoes!”

“You got her a suit but no shoes? For shame, Boss,” Ikkaku giggled, getting up to help Seiuchi and Jude clear the tables. “I thought you were supposed to be a ladies’ man.”

“I’m a cruel bastard who doesn’t do something for nothing. She can borrow yours.”

Sauntering over, she playfully poked him in the forehead. “Says who?”

Law snorted and childishly poked her right back. “Me. Your captain. The guy who pays your salary.”

“You pay me to keep the submarine running and sass you when you’re being an idiot.”

“I don’t pay you for that.”

“Mmmm, you’re right; that’s a service I provide for free.”

“If I didn’t know better, I’d say those two were siblings,” Nami chuckled under her breath.

“Right? When I was first recruited I was convinced they were secretly related,” Uni agreed.

Bepo gave them both a smile and said quietly, “I think it’s good for them. Especially Law. I think he secretly likes having a little sister again.”

Brown eyes widened at that little tidbit. Law had a sister? What happened to her? Bepo had stated the past tense, so there was either some kind of falling out or…

…oh no, she thought, turning to watch Law continue to bicker good-naturedly with Ikkaku, his expression annoyed but the glimmer in his eyes belying that he was enjoying himself. Another piece of the puzzle that was the Surgeon of Death had fallen into her lap, but it wasn’t a particularly happy one. Sure, people died or were killed all the time, but Nami couldn’t imagine what she’d be like if she’d lost Nojiko. And depending on how young they’d been or how she’d died, that could really fuck with a guy.

“Nami-ya.”

Her attention was yanked from her musing as Law called her name. He was on his feet, plate clean and smirk dangerous as he regarded her. Nami wondered whether this would be the last time she’d see him in a genuinely good mood for the rest of the evening. “It’s seven o’clock. Time to get ready to watch history be defiled by pretentious morons. And for your obnoxious thunder god’s sake, make sure you’re wearing shoes you can actually run in.”

( @ninhaoma-ya, @awesomi, @vannahfanfics)

[cheri-cheri]

[L&N] Jesse’s Main Storyline - Reunion

🍒 Warning: Contains detailed spoilers from Chapter 8 of the main storyline of Light and Night 🍒

Previous section: here

He’s Jesse? But the youth who was with me that day-

Staring blankly at the clean and clear face, my heart thumps heavily. That’s right. Those eyes are stubborn and bright.

Jesse: There’s something unique about MC’s designs. She likes drawing four-sided stars. You could compare it with her earlier drafts. It’d be clear at a glance who copied whom.

But this is a little secret between me and my grandmother. No one else would-

I’m in a daze. I’m basically a dummy.

One other person knows about it. Someone who was almost forgotten with time.

I stare at him in disbelief, and have the illusion that this is a game of hide-and-seek which has been going on for seven years.

This instance is akin to a movie scene. The years accelerate in reverse, each frame filled with memories engraved on my heart.

-

Him at 13 years old: What kind of adults do you think we’d become next time? I really want to travel to the future and have a look.

-

Him at 11 years old: Since you gave me Chinese tuition, I’ll reluctantly go to the same junior high school as you and teach you math.

-

Him at 8 years old: Next time, I’m going to be an outstanding person. Outstanding people will have lots of money, and I can afford to buy everything you want to eat!

-

MC at 7 years old: Hey, why are you squatting on the floor with mud on your face?

Him at 5 years old: [crying] T-they threw mud at me. They said I’m a fatty, and that fatties are most useless...

MC at 7 years old: Don’t be afraid! I’ll wipe it off for you. Next time, just follow me. I’ll protect you! Don’t cry. Real men don’t cry.

Him at 5 years old: Sob sob sob... okay...

MC at 7 years old: What’s your name?

Him at 5 years old: My name is Xia Ming Xing. Xia for 夏天 (“xiao tian” - summer), Ming for 一鸣惊人 (“yi ming jing ren” - amazing the world), and Xing for 星星 (“xing xing” - star)-

MC at 7 years old: What a difficult name. Can I just call you Xing Xing?

Him at 5 years old: That sounds like the relative of monkeys.

[Note] In Chinese, 猩猩 (“xing xing”) is “gorilla”

MC at 7 years old: How about Ming Ming?

Him at 5 years old: The uncle next door is called Ming Ming.

MC at 7 years old: Hm, I’ll call you “Dumpling” then. You look like a dumpling.

Him at 5 years old: Sure, dumplings are so delicious.

MC at 7 years old: Let’s make a pinky promise to always be friends.

-

Time moves in reverse, and once again returns to the present. I feel as though a gust of wind that was stalled in the past is now coursing between us, blowing away the many years apart.

MC: Dump-

I smile, unable to help myself as I call his name. The moment I say one syllable, he clasps a hand over my mouth.

The composed youth from earlier is now flushed, giving me a pitiful look.

At this moment, Wu You’s face is ghastly pale.

MC: I’m uninterested and have no time to play such games with you. This is a competition, and it has its rules. I can afford to lose and can afford to win. I accept a just contest, but I reject dishonest tricks. There are many more designers, including your sister, who are striving to make even better products. That’s the meaning of designing. I’ve already explained what I had to. I trust that everyone can make their own judgements.

Grabbing Dumpling’s hand, I turn around to leave. Now, there’s something even more important waiting for me.

Feeling the warmth in his palm, the youth’s expression turns from astounded to beaming with happiness.

Jesse: Let’s go.

Pulling him to a place where we won’t be disturbed, I suddenly feel a little speechless.

What should I say? Exchange conventional greetings? Would that be too formal?

But we haven’t seen each other in so many years. It might be awkward to talk about other things.

He seems to realise this as well. He looks at me, dumbfounded and at a loss for what to do.

MC: Erm, Xia Ming Xing, it’s been a long time.

Jesse is taken aback for a moment. Then, he bursts out laughing.

Jesse: Who are you? Why are you calling me by my full name? Give that fierce girl back to me!

He reaches out to pinch my cheeks, his appearance as playful as back then.

MC: Stinky Dumpling. You’re the one who’s fierce. I haven’t asked why-

Before I can finish speaking, I’m pulled into a hug. It’s cosy and tastes of sunlight. The second half of my question melts into his arms.

Jesse: Did you know that it’s been a very, very long time since I heard the name “Dumpling”...

He tightens his grip, burying his head in the crook of my neck.

MC: Dumpling...

Jesse: Mm.

MC: Dumpling Dumpling Dumpling!

Jesse: I’m here.

Jesse: Did she bully you earlier? It’s my fault for arriving too late. She made things difficult for you for such a long time.

His voice brings with it a nasally tone. It’s gentle, like a cup of hot milk gradually flowing into my heart.

MC: Why are you only asking me about that?

Jesse: What else should I ask about? What’s more important than you getting bullied?

MC: I’m fine, thank you.

Unexpectedly, he’s given a fright and blinks incessantly.

Jesse: MC, have you gone silly? You actually thanked me?

MC: ?

Jesse: Aren’t you going to throw me a left hook, then ask where the hell I’ve been these years-

I place my hands on my hips, pretending to be angry.

MC: Why would I ask where the hell you’ve been? Didn’t we know each other just two days ago?

Jesse: What do you mean “two days ago”?! We’ve known each other for 15 years and 9 months!

MC: But why do I recall how a certain person refused to talk to me unless he wore a strawberry headgear?

Jesse: I... I was afraid you’d ignore me once you recognised me. I wanted to meet you again in a more formal setting.

MC: In that case, why did you rush into the room furiously?

Jesse: They were bullying you right under my nose. How could I hold myself back! 

Jesse: Don’t be angry, okay?

He shifts closer to me. No matter where my eyes look, he meets them immediately. 

Faced with such a pair of pure eyes, my temper dissipates. It’s as though everything in the past has been written off in them.

MC: Shouldn’t you give me an apology before I forgive you?

Jesse: Sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry-

He continues on and on, as though he'd continue saying this till the sky turns dark if I don’t get him to stop.

MC: That’s enough, I forgive you.

And with that, a bear hug lunges at me.

I’ve genuinely forgotten if his hugs were this warm during childhood.

Now, these pair of arms are filled with a comforting ease.

There are so many things I want to ask him. I want to ask if he’s been living well, and why he didn't give me a single call.

More than that, I want to ask why he left without saying goodbye.

But when I open my mouth, I swallow the words back down.

He mentioned that he couldn’t see me due to certain reasons. In that case, I’ll ask next time. Anyway, we’ve already reunited, and there’s still a very long time ahead.

MC: All right all right, you can let go now.

Jesse: Hang on. We haven’t seen each other for 7 years. Shouldn’t we make up for what was lost? One hug per year will do. That means seven, each lasting 5 seconds. In total, 35 seconds!

He actually calculated it seriously.

??: Cough.

I hear a cough from behind me, and feel Xia Ming Xing’s body stiffen. He lets go of me reluctantly.

MC: Jiang Lai?

Jiang Lai looks at me awkwardly, then drags Gao Cheng from his hiding place behind her back.

Gao Cheng: We didn’t want to disturb you two.

Jiang Lai: We just wanted to tell you that the producer decided to use your designs.

MC: Really? That’s great!

Jiang Lai’s a tsundere so MC has to take the initiative to ask the three of them to form a team

Jiang Lai and Gao Cheng leave

Jesse: They’ve already left, so why are you still looking? The person you should be looking at is here.

Jesse: Can I send you home? Just like in junior high. 

MC: I was clearly the one who brought you home, okay? I sent you safely into your mom’s hands. Little Brat.

Out of habit, I reach out to tousle his hair, but realise I can only reach it by standing on tiptoes since he has grown much taller.

Jesse: Don’t call me Little Brat!

MC: Well, I’m two years older than you.

Jesse: But I’m already taller than you!

The youth lowers his eyes to look at me, his smile dazzling.

Jesse: Let’s go home~

-

MC: Let me test you. Which bus did we use to take? I moved houses due to work, but I still take the same bus.

Jesse: 102.

MC: How are you still able to remember?

Jesse: Of course I remember everything. I remember things related to you even better than yourself. The bus is here, the bus is here!

He places a hand on my back and we hurry onto the bus.

Although it’s a weekend, the bus is filled with students in uniform. We have no choice but to grip the handles while standing.

Jesse: Do you think they’re attending make-up classes? Isn’t today a Sunday?

MC: Many students have classes over the weekends these days. It’s unlike our time, where we had two days to rest.

Jesse: Wow, that’s great. Sigh. If only we were born a few years later.

MC: Let me off! Why didn’t I know that you were so enthusiastic about learning in the past?

Jesse: I’m enthusiastic about learning now. Is that wrong?

Jesse: Hey, look at that pair-

He points to the last row of the bus. A boy and girl are sitting next to each other, one earpiece in each ear. They aren’t interacting at all, and are staring out of the windows.

The boy would occasionally turn his head and glance at the girl, but will avert his gaze before the girl realises.

Jesse: Don’t they resemble us from back then?

MC: In what way? We were so boisterous.

Jesse: Correction. You hit me one-sidedly.

I shoot him a glare.

Jesse: But they’re still far from us. He wasn’t as handsome as I was back then.

MC: ...

Jesse: Look at them. One hand holding their school bag, the other placed on the seat. At a glance, it’s clear that they want to hold hands but don’t dare to.

MC: They look like junior high students. Where’s your mind wandering off to?

Jesse: These eyes of mine have seen through too many things. Sigh, what dummies! Just shift over slowly and grab it.

MC: You sound as if you’d actually do it.

Jesse: Of course I would. It’s just that I didn’t dare. Otherwise, I’d have-

MC: You’d have what?

He glances at me, then shakes his head, lips tightly sealed.

MC: Boasting again.

The bus suddenly jolts. The boy’s phone tumbles onto the ground, rolling in front of us. Xia Ming Xing picks it up and returns it to them.

Glancing at the tune that’s currently being played, I realise that it’s the male singer I liked most back then.

MC: How nostalgic. I was the same back then, only daring to listen to music on the MP3 after school.

Jesse: I was different. I listened to it in broad daylight in the classroom.

MC: Which is why The Exterminator confiscated it five times.

Jesse: But afterwards, I exchanged it with five exam scripts with full marks.

MC: Show off. Back then, I thought about how the days passed by so slowly. I wondered when I could grow up, because I’d finally be able to do the things I wanted to. I didn’t expect for time to speed by. After becoming an adult, each day passes by so quickly, and I don’t even have time to listen to music. In the blink of an eye, the people around me changed.

Jesse: But some things didn’t change, did they? We became the type of adults we are based on what remained.

MC: What remained for you then?

He no longer speaks, looking at me quietly with a silly smile.

MC: I realised that the frequency of your silly smiles are a little high.

Jesse: I’m looking at what remained for me. If we had gone to the same senior high school, what kind of people would we have become?

MC: You probably wouldn’t have gotten slimmer. After all, you came over to my house every day to freeload on meals.

Jesse: Do you think I can’t tell that you’re being sarcastic?

MC: Hahahaha-

How would we have turned out? I have no idea either.

When I travelled across the ocean after my grandmother’s death in my sophomore year, we would have parted anyway.

MC: Fortunately, we’ve met again now.

An earbud is suddenly stuffed into my ear. An acoustic guitar prelude instantly pulls me back to those youthful years.

I originally thought that I had forgotten the lyrics since a long time ago. But I can still hum “small yellow flower” and “playing on a swing”.

It turns out that the things we thought were forgotten are engraved in our minds, waiting to be awakened.

MC: There’s a similar MP3 in my house, but it’s broken and I need to get it fixed by a servicing shop. Oh yes, why are you listening to this song? Weren’t you distasteful of it in the past?

Jesse: It isn’t bad after listening to it again and again, although it’s still a little lacking as compared to me. In the past, you used to say that I was the God of Singing in your eyes.

MC: Hahahahaha, fine fine, God of Singing. I didn’t expect you to really enter this industry and become a musical actor. It’s miraculous.

Jesse: Miraculous?

MC: When we were younger, there was an essay where we had to write about what we wanted to be when we grew up. You wrote about being a singer who sang for the entire world. Afterwards, your mom saw it and forced you to erase it all off, changing it to a scientist.

Hearing me talk about his embarrassing past, he scratches the back of his head abashedly.

MC: Being able to make your dream come true, especially if it’s a dream which isn’t understood or affirmed, is truly incredible.

Jesse: That’s because I have a secret strength supporting me.

Hearing the music, I suddenly think of the outfit I had designed for him. Perhaps I could add a few more elements related to youth.

Taking out my notebook from my bag quickly, my head suddenly feels dizzy, and my nose bumps against his shoulder.

MC: That hurts!

Jesse: [sighs] ...

He turns his body in resignation, bending his back.

Jesse: Draw while leaning on my back, Miss.

MC: Mm!

-

The sky gets dark very early in autumn. The evening breeze raises a hue from afar, and leaves rustle from the trees.

The hubbub of voices on the bus and affectionate teasing seem to have been dispersed by the breeze, leaving without a trace. What’s left are the both of us walking home in silence from the bus-stop.

Moonlight leaks from the trees along the roadside, outlining the side of Xia Ming Xing’s face. It’s no longer roundish, and has become a little foreign.

MC: Dumpling, why did you suddenly move away back then?

I have no idea why I suddenly asked this. There was simply a strange feeling that he’d disappear again if I didn’t ask about it.

A twinge of guilt flashes past Xia Ming Xing’s face.

Jesse: Do you still remember the call I gave you on the day I left?

MC: Call? What call?

Jesse: You don’t remember? You picked it up, but hung up after I said a few words.

MC: ...when did I hang up?

Why do I have no impression of this at all?!

MC: What’s going on?

Jesse: Back then, my family was moving. I managed to fight for one week with my parents, wanting to stay behind to finish the competition with you. I didn’t have the guts to tell you because I was afraid you’d be upset if you knew. Afterwards, I summoned my courage and gave you a call. But you weren’t willing to listen to me.

MC: That never happened. Why didn’t I know about this at all...

Jesse: So you never hung up?

He grabs my shoulders, his fingers cold as ice. I can almost feel his body trembling.

Jesse: It wasn’t that you didn’t want to hear from me?!

He asks once more, his tone seeking confirmation.

For a period of time after he left, I refused to hear the name which was equivalent to “betrayal” in my heart. But no one knew that I was secretly looking forward to him returning one day.

At the very least, it could prove that I wasn’t the party who was abandoned.

But why was this the answer? A mistake? A perhaps irretrievable mistake from such a long time in the past?

With this thought, my chest feels suffocated.

MC: So that’s why you didn’t look for me in all these years?

The youth remains silent, orange strands of hair blowing up with the wind.

Jesse: I had my reasons for not contacting you. It had nothing to do with the call. I... just wasn't brave enough.

I suddenly have no idea how to respond to his calm gaze, and I also understand that neither of us were at fault for the parting back then.

MC: Xia Ming Xing.

Jesse: Hm?

MC: Were you the one who put the MP3 into the tin?

Jesse: Mm.

MC: So you put the card in there too.

Jesse: Mm. But I didn’t participate in the competition with you, and couldn’t stay by your side. I don’t seem to have kept any promises.

I shake my head forcefully, eyes already damp.

Jesse: But now, I won’t shirk from it. As long as it’s something I promise you, I’ll definitely do it.

He takes a step towards me. The years have caused the once delicate youth to change entirely, turning into the man in front of me, whose eyes are especially resolute. With such a gaze, I’ll always choose to believe him, no matter what.

After sending me home, he stands in the corridor as he watches me enter, just like in the past.

Five minutes later, a rustling sound comes at the window.

Jesse: MC, open the window!

Opening the window in confusion, the image before me almost causes tears to leave my eyes.

Pink confetti flutters and blooms in the city sky, dancing gently in the clear summer night, akin to that snow which had yet to appear many years ago.

Amidst the pink coloured snow, the youth reveals a bright and hearty smile as he waves at me.

Jesse: You asked if I regretted it. The answer is - I regret it. I regret it very much, and at every single moment. Summer is already over, but why do I feel as though this summer has just begun? 

Jesse: Next week, come and watch my performance. This time, it’d be my turn to wait for you.

MC: Mm, I’ll definitely be there!

-

Only after the snowflakes finish their descent does Xia Ming Xing reluctantly walk home. If he was slightly braver and slightly stronger back then, would the ending to their story be different?

He doesn’t know. It seems that particular rainy day is still before his eyes. It’s late at night, and a figure flashes past at the end of the dim alley.

Jesse: Who’s there!

The surroundings are completely silent. Xia Ming Xing turns his head and looks at the girl’s illuminated window, then quickly chases after that figure.

A crow flaps its wings and flies past at a low altitude. The moss-covered corner is encased by deathly pale moonlight. Xia Ming Xing stops in his footsteps, black blood soaking his shoes.

However, he doesn’t pay any mind to it. His gaze is locked tightly on that figure whose knees are on the ground, bowing devoutly towards the moon.

Jesse: Who are you?

That person turns around slowly. It’s a girl around ten years of age, and she’s small and petite.

Black hair covers her cheeks. She lifts the white candle in her hand, stuffing it into her mouth and chewing on it. The two golden bracelets on her wrist jingle.

Jesse: Her soul has been taken-

The moonlight grows increasingly bright. An indiscernible black spot suddenly appears on the girl’s chest, and the stench of something burning begins to fill the air.

Seeing that the girl is about to bite the tip of her tongue off, a rope flies from his hand, binding and tying the girl up.

The white candle falls to the ground. Xia Ming Xing lifts up two fingers, twisting a charm towards the girl. With a tearing sound, the charm turns into ashes in the air.

-

Three days later, it’s the day of the final competition of “Upper Hand”

MC is caught in a traffic jam along the way and decides to alight from the taxi halfway through

Sadly, she arrives just as the curtain falls

I hesitate, not knowing if I should approach him.

However, Xiao Ming Xing is already walking towards me. He has changed out of his performance outfit, and is wearing a simple t-shirt and jeans, looking clean and fresh.

Jesse: How was it? I didn’t embarrass you, did I?

I don’t really have the guts to look at him.

MC: I’ll tell you something, but don’t get mad.

Jesse: Every time you said that in the past, nothing good happened.

MC: Really?

Jesse: The first time you said it, you broke my game console.

MC: ...

Jesse: The second time you said it, you cooked me expired cup noodles for supper.

MC: ...

Jesse: The third time-

MC: Enough!

Why do I have such a black record!

Jesse: Go on, I’ve mentally prepared myself.

MC: Actually, I only heard the last five seconds of that song.

Jesse: ...

I can clearly sense that he’s akin to a deflated balloon. His eyebrows, which were arched earlier, droop downwards.

MC: Sorry. I’ll treat you to orange soda and vanilla ice-cream until you’re stuffed, okay!

I lift my hand up, gesturing a vow. Pulling a long face earlier, Xia Ming Xing suddenly bursts into laughter.

Jesse: MC, why can’t I get angry with you?

MC: You’ve forgiven me?

Jesse: I didn’t say that.

MC: But you just said that you can’t get angry with me.

Jesse: If you want me to forgive you, sing a song with me!

MC: ...what?

Before I can react, he grabs my hand and rushes towards the stage.

The youth has a smile which says that he has gotten his way. It’s as if this moment is something he’s been plotting for a very long time.

The moment we step onto the stage, a familiar melody sounds. In an instant, I feel as though I’ve travelled to a lifetime ago.

Jesse: Still remember this song? We named it together - “Portrait of Youth”.

How could I not remember? This was the song we wrote together for the competition back then.

It’s the song that we wanted to clinch the championship with.

It was a song we didn’t get to sing in the end.

In an empty basement, we’d hold our cola cans like microphones, practising till late at night.

We had immaturely mimicked the lyrics we didn’t understand at that age. But many years later, I realise that each line has turned into our story.

It’s as though something in the depths of my body is being awakened. It’s the fervour and anticipation that a youth has for the future, throbbing and pure.

My eyes can’t help but feel warm, and I find myself singing along with him involuntarily. 

-

Portrait of Youth (audio here)

That vanilla ice-cream

Melted in our rainy season

That old piano

“Ding dong ding dong” - is the tapping of the hour hand

Back then, I always loved to tease you

But didn’t allow anyone else to make you cry

You always said that I was a koi

But I was always asking you for tuition before exams

Dragonflies fly past our heads

Our inseparable shadows when we were young walk slowly in our memories

On the bicycle, I’m the only one with sweat like rain

I’m the only one left on the bicycle dripping with sweat

You were long gone from behind me

If the storm didn't block our vision that day

If I knew how to say goodbye that day

The flower petals in the diary

The unwashed roll of film from the camera

They wouldn’t be lonely longings

If the string of the kite didn’t break that day

If I could have been slightly braver that day

The empty pages in the diary

Wouldn’t have been filled with moss

The seven years in which we wandered off can’t be lost.

-

The lights gather in his eyes, and I'm reflected in them. It has been the case since many years ago.

All the stories seem to have ended with summer, but they begin with summer as well.

Fortunately, summer will always arrive. This unfinished story shall begin on this summer day.

[barbaracleboy]

So, because I’ve been seeing a few different takes and opinions on Vi’s relationship with The Hive, I thought that maybe I could give my take on it too, because why not? Please keep in mind that I’m a little stupid, and I tend to not dig deep when analyzing things: I like watching or reading in-depth analyses, but I tend to think about stories or gameplay mechanics largely on what I can see, and I don’t think that hard about the complexities or realities or whatever of most things. So forgive me if many of my points are obvious, or if some of what I say isn’t that well-thought out or anything like that. Also, as always, I have absolutely zero intention to insult anybody or tell them they’re viewing the game wrong: we all view things differently, and I thought it’d be nice if I talk a little about how I viewed Vi’s story, if for no other reason than to just explain why I say or draw or do what I do. With that in-mind, hopefully my analysis isn’t too simple or whatever…

Vi didn’t like The Hive, we know this. The reasons she gives, if I remember, are mainly that nobody believed in her dreams of being an explorer (and many made fun of her for it). With this “analysis” I wish to get into why I felt the Bees didn’t believe in Vi and why Vi said what she did.

To start off, the fact that The Hive discouraged Vi’s exploring, and the behavior of The Hive in a couple other ways, seems to be based on IRL beehives, and how Bees in general aren’t aggressive. As such, it could make sense that they didn't approve of the idea of one of their own going out to go exploring, potentially looking for trouble and getting themselves hurt. A more unique, in-universe reason also exists: Snakemouth Den. Now, while Snakemouth Den has also been known to be scary to the Ants, they had a reason not to discourage exploration: it held an artifact that the Ant Queen wanted. The Bees clearly didn’t care as much about the Sapling or anything that can help them obtain it (considering they used an artifact to make their factory and didn’t even know it), so when they heard of their kind going to Snakemouth Den and never coming back, their reaction was likely something like “Holy shit, stay away from that place and any place like it.” They didn’t want treasures or immortality (at least most of them didn’t), and if trying to get it meant death they’d rather stay away from it. Speaking of Queens, Bianca probably also plays a hand in why the Bees were so against Vi becoming an explorer. By Vi’s own admission Bianca is a pacifist, and that coupled with Bianca (trying to) treat her subjects more like her children than most Queens seem to points to the idea that she feels her little babees would be safer and happier at home than exploring. This care for safety can be seen as soon as and even before you enter The Hive: there’s a little room to scan for anything that could potentially be harmful to The Hive, and you can’t even enter without having a guard start the elevator for you. They clearly want danger as far away from them as possible. “Why does Bianca have a military if she’s a pacifist and cares for her kids’ safety, then?”  Honestly, that’s a good question, and the best answer I have is that it’d be stupid not to have a defense force, especially in the Lost Sands (which are home to all sorts of Bandits and monsters) and with the close proximity to with The Wasps (who are known to usually be aggressive, and have particularly been so since some time before the start of the game). That’s not even getting into Vi being a teenager, which would probably further discourage The Hive from supporting her wanting to be an explorer: you should support the dreams of young people, but there’s a difference between a kid, I don’t know, wanting to be an engineer and wanting to be a bounty hunter. One is notably more dangerous (and probably less common) than the other, and while stomping on a kid’s dream is mean it’s perhaps better, in some scenarios, than encouraging them to do something that can get them killed. Hell, a large part of why Vi became as successful an explorer as she did was that she had a team to help her out, and she initially didn’t seem to want that. A young girl, in a society that cares a ton about being safe, trying to go off and fight monsters and bad guys on her own (probably just in the hopes of getting rich)? It’s no wonder her peers wouldn’t support that.

All that said, do I think Bees were justified in denying Vi her dream? That she should have just shut up and sucked it up? No, of course not. They clearly cared too much about safety, to the point that they let one of their own leave anyway due to her feeling so out of place for thinking differently. There was clearly a lack of empathy for her, and I highly doubt that their responses to Vi were all variations of “Now, now, don’t hurt yourself!”, there probably was a lot of teasing and even some bullying. Now, I don’t think Vi is invalid or wrong for leaving or being upset...but I also feel like she may not be too reliable a “Narrator”. 

That’s not to say she was lying, that she never experienced anything bad in The Hive...but to be frank, she is a [bit of a stupid d:] teenager. She’s a little selfish, she’s a little reckless, and she probably said and did a lot of what she said and did due to big teen emotions. She talked about Bees like they were all bullies, and pompous, but does The Hive really give that impression? Do the Bees? When she returns almost none of them seem to bring up anything bad, they don’t seem to be making fun of her, there doesn’t seem to be any animosity towards her from them, despite how bad she tended to speak of them. “Well, Vi probably didn’t know a lot of them, and vice versa.” That could very well be true, but most of the ones we see in-game seem to have experience with Vi: even ignoring all the ones that have a notable amount of screen time or mandatory dialogue, Vi seems to know multiple of them by name, and many of them know Vi’s name too, and if she’s been gone so long you’d think one would have forgotten the other unless they had spent a non-insignificant time together. She seems to have formed relationships with multiple bees, and while few if any of them were as close as the one she formed with Jaune they probably existed, it’s not like she got along with nobody but Jaune. The point I’m trying to make by talking about relationships is that you’d think there would be multiple Jaune-type situations, of Vi being very mad at one of the bees and vice versa, but that doesn’t seem to be the case. Vi’s anger is mostly general, she mostly talks crap about The Hive as a whole, while few if any of the bees seem to hold a grudge against her. This leads me to think that Vi makes a big deal about all the other bees bullying her out of hyperbole, and her emotions making her think the situation’s worse than it is: I mean, she claims that all bees are pompous, but really only Beette fits that description, right? And even Beette is noted to not be that bad, for selling you the key to the house of whatever (though personally I feel she still seemed pretty rude, but eh). Vi is very upset, to the point that she says things that aren’t entirely true and kind of throw multiple people under the bus (I know that type of anger, let me fuckin’ tell you). This anger, of course, comes because she was so close to Jaune, and enjoyed time with her more than any other Bee. I assume Vi was hoping Jaune would support that dream more than the other bees would, but when she didn’t Vi was really hurt, and in her anger she said bad things to everybody in The Hive and left. She probably wasn’t thinking about what she was saying or how leaving would affect her or whatever, she was just having angry teenage angst and she wanted out (having said that, you could totally make the argument that Jaune was a jerk for being so upset about a little insult, but again, eh). I feel like Vi might have even felt she was being irrational, at least deep down, but what she was feeling at the time of her leaving took priority. When Kabbu falls through the trapdoor in Snakemouth, Vi says something along the lines of “This is the perfect time to go home.” It’s probably a throwaway line, maybe I’m overthinking things for once, but what if that was her going “Okay, I know I said all that stuff but things are really bad now and I just wanna go home.” I can believe that, when I was young I said and tried to do some stupid things, but it didn’t take long before I decided to at least try to calm down, do something less intense maybe. I can believe that a kid like Vi would try something crazy in order to stick it to everyone who said she couldn’t, but would perhaps think twice upon seeing the dangers. Vi and Kabbu had barely spent any time in Snakemouth before he fell, so I imagine that when Vi saw there was some actual danger in exploring she at least briefly thought about how she behaved, thought that she might have been letting her emotions get the best of her, and considered going home where she probably was safe. Even if she didn’t intend go all the way back to The Hive, the point is that what she said and did when leaving could very well have been her just acting out in frustration. In the end it’s for the best that she continued with exploring (for a wide variety of reasons), but my point is that her initial push to do so came largely from that initial bout of frustration.

So, to make a long story short, I feel that The Hive cared very heavily about safety, for many reasons, and as such wished for Vi to not be an explorer for her own good. Things were not that bad for Vi, but when much of her society, including her closest sister, didn’t approve of what she wanted she threw somewhat of a fit and ran off, perhaps feeling that she was overreacting a little but being too young and headstrong to not do exactly what she wanted to do. Once again, my point here is not that The Hive was right, Vi was wrong. It’s more that the situation was complicated and bad, and both Vi and her peers had a lot to learn (which, in my opinion, they mostly did learn by the end of the main story). 

I don’t know, I think a big part of why I go to bat for The Hive so much is that I very, very much value family. It’s kind of how I was raised, I feel that the people that share your blood, that likely live with you and likely care for you and likely know about you way more than most other people are special, and that the relationships with them are also special, so it’s best to try and keep things as good with them as possible. I’m not saying that you should be a slave to people, or you should take abuse from people, or that you should support bad behavior, all because those involved are related to you. I just feel that it’s important to try and understand the feelings of those you’re close to, and that (when fair and applicable) we should always try to have the best possible relationship with our family. Vi initially failed with both of these, and so did Jaune and many of the other bees.

To go on a little tangent, I think the family stuff is a big part of why I love The Hive as much as I do. With how many of the Bees seem to know each other (compared to the Ants, where there doesn’t seem to be much in the way of interactions implied or otherwise), how Bianca views The Bees as her children, and how Vi’s formed a close relationship with one of her many, many sisters, The Hive just seems to be a family much more than any other kingdom: this is in both good ways like Bees being closer, and less than good ways like having unfortunate situations (failures to communicate, misunderstandings, and feelings of being ignored or unsupported) like many families do. I think I like all that a lot due to my aforementioned value of family stuff, and one can even give lore-y reasons for it being neat. Like, real life bug colonies don’t really do family stuff, right? They just work to care for the colony, that’s it. That The Hive holds much more in the way close bonds could be a sign of the change from crystals continuing, and having more effects than immediately obvious: not only are bugs losing limbs but living longer, they’re gaining their own wants, and they’re former closer bonds to each other than “This is my fellow worker, we both will make the honey.” I just find that sweet, I think, and with what’s shown of Vi and how she interacts with The Hive in-game I think it tells a sweet story of a girl feeling separated from her home and family but learning that things weren’t that bad, repairing bridges that could have stayed burnt, and probably bringing about changes that will make the people there happier. Bianca mentions how “We have heard of [Vi’s] exploits”, and how “the outside world did [her] some good”: from the sounds of it multiple Bees were proud of Vi for her success as an explorer, and one can imagine that leading to more explorers coming from The Hive, as well as the Bees learning to support unique ideas more. For as sad as the situation with Vi and The Hive was, it seems to have with her learning to like her old home again and it will likely lead to it getting even better than it was before.

Hoo, that was a whole lot of talking and I can’t help but fear that a lot of it is either rambly, repetitive, or illogical...but, uh, if you read all the way through it then thank you so much! I appreciate it, and I hope it wasn’t too difficult to read. I bet there’s all sorts of stuff we don’t know that could be for or against my reading: for all we know Bianca kept Vi in a cupboard back when she lived in The Hive, for all we know Vi set multiple Bees on fire on purpose. But, based on what we do know, that’s how I feel about the situation. Once more, I do not intend to insult anybody that thinks differently from me or anything (tbh I get the impression a lot of people may think different from me, ha): I just prefer funnier and happier stuff (as I feel I’ve said many times before), and I just felt like showing why I viewed the deal with Vi and The Hive to be a sad one, but one rife with misunderstanding (amongst the bugs involved at least) and one that ended quite positively. If you disagree that’s perfectly fine, I just hope I explained myself in a way that makes sense and isn’t like, stupidly simple or ignorant or whatever. Even if it is, I apologize. I just think the Bees are all cute and I like to think that they’re happy, ha.

[teenwolffanclub-me]

Season 1, Episode 7: Night School (Part Two)

Hey there beautiful reader! If you’re new here, this is a series I’m writing where each chapter is an episode from the first season of Teen Wolf. If you’ve been here before, hey! I missed you! Previous and future chapters are linked at the end of each part if you want to catch up.

Pairing: Stiles x Psychic! Reader (eventually)

Notes: Okay, this one is a lot too. I may have gotten a bit carried away, but so much happens in this episode! And it’s my favorite!

P.S. Jackson manages to be more suspect than the alpha, Allison needs a chill pill ASAP, and Derek is wanted for murder

                                                    ———————

“Why did you come? What are you doing here?”

Scott rushed the words out the second he laid eyes on Allison. She looked between the three of us, her gaze pausing over my underdressed state, before staring at him in bewilderment.

“Because you asked me to...” She held up her phone as proof, pointing to a text that was very much from him telling her to come here.

Scott’s eyes widened in shock and he snatched the phone out of her hands. She reeled back, surprised.

“I didn’t send this.” His voice was hard as he scrolled through their messages.

“What? What’s going on? Who sent it then?” Her eyes continued flickering between us, searching for answers.

The phone stated ringing in Scott’s hands and she took it back quickly. She glanced at the caller I.D, huffed out a breath of relief, and put it up to her ear.

“Where are you?” She immediately demanded.

Just then, Lydia and Jackson came striding through the lobby doors. They both seemed annoyed to be here, but at least Jackson didn’t look like he was actively dying anymore.

“Finally.” Lydia sighed, raising her eyebrows at us expectantly. “Can we go now?”

Before any of us could respond, there was a loud thud in the ceiling above us. The tiles started creaking as slow footsteps stomped around. We all froze. My heart instantly began racing again at the thought of the alpha so close.

“Run!” Scott yelled at the same moment it came crashing to the floor beside us.

He grabbed Allison’s hand and they took off, the rest of us not far behind. The alpha growled and barked as it chased us down the hall, which was honestly surprising. I never imagined werewolves barking.

I struggled to steady my breathing as we made our way down the hall and into the cafeteria. Scott slammed the doors before locking the deadbolts into the floor. Instantly, everyone started freaking out.

“Help me get these in front of the doors!” Scott was trying to use a table to baracade us inside.

“What was that? Scott? What was that?” Allison shrieked, tugging her hands through her hair.

“Was it in the ceiling?” Lydia added, throwing her arms up in confusion.

“Wait. Not in here.” I heard Stiles mutter, and I wasn’t sure if he was even talking to us or just himself.

“The chairs! Stack the chairs!” Scott was rushing around frantically, not even bothering to check if anyone was actually listening to him.

“Guys, can we just wait a second? You guys, listen to me!” Stiles raised his voice, annoyed that he was being ignored.

Jackson, Lydia, and Allison sprang forward and started grabbing anything they could to add weight to the table. I just wrapped my arms around myself and watched, worried about the level of noise they were all making.

“Guys? Stiles talking. Can we hang on one second please? Hello!” I jumped in surprise at his unexpected shout, and turned my attention his way.

Everyone else whipped around to face him expectantly, ditching their effort at the doors.

“Okay. Nice work. Really beautiful job, everyone. Now...what should we do about the twenty foot wall of windows?” He gestured toward the aforementioned windows with a jerk of his arms.

I cringed, knowing he had a point. The alpha was in the school with us now, but that didn’t mean it would stay that way. It had already proven its intelligence by trapping us with the dumpsters. I wasn’t about to make the mistake of underestimating it again.

“Can somebody please explain to me what’s going on here? Because I am totally freaking out and I would like to know why.” Allison’s voice shook as she tried desperately to fight back tears. She tugged at Scott’s arm and called his name when he avoided her pleading eyes.

Alright. Come on. This is when you tell her.

He pulled himself free and stalked over to a nearby table before letting his elbows rest on it and pinching the bridge of his nose. Allison threw her hands up in exasperation and her gaze moved to me in question. I gave her a one shouldered shrug, not knowing what else to do.

How the hell would we get out of this without telling them everything? A few moments of tense silence passed and I huffed in frustration. If he wasn’t going to do it, I would. I was beyond done with the secrets and the lies. I opened my mouth, about to spill the beans, when Stiles interrupted me.

“Somebody killed the janitor.” He sent me a pointed look and took a few steps toward where Allison, Lydia, and Jackson stood in a line.

I clenched my jaw and tightened the sides of his jacket around my torso. They were going to find out eventually. It would be much better if it came directly from the source.

“What?” Lydia looked terrified by that news, her emerald eyes widening in horror.

“Yeah. He’s dead.” He confirmed with a surprising lack of emotion, glancing around the room to gauge everyone’s reaction. I blame his weird fascination with his dad’s line of work. He’d seen way too much even before the supernatural was involved.

I’d somehow almost forgotten that had happened, and the reminder brought the seriousness of our situation crashing back down onto me. Someone was dead because of the alpha. And now we were stuck, bound to be next any minute.

“What’s he talking about?” Allison forced out a pained laugh and looked to Scott. “Is this a joke?”

“Wha—who killed him?” Jackson spoke up for the first time, not sounding completely convinced.

“No, no, no, no.” Lydia’s eyes welled with tears as she started breathing erratically. “This was supposed to be over. The—the mountain lion...”

“Don’t you get it?” Jackson interrupted harshly. “There was no mountain lion.”

“Who was it? What does he want? What’s happening?” Allison demanded, her voice hard.

I chewed on my bottom lip nervously, feeling like we were quickly losing control of this situation. Keeping them in the dark was making things so much worse right now.

“Scott!” She snapped when he didn’t respond, and he finally spun around to face us.

“I-I don’t know. I just—if we go out there, he’s gonna kill us.” His voice wavered on the lie and he barely raised his eyes from the floor.

“Kill us?” Lydia asked pointedly, crossing her arms over her chest with a pop of her hip.

I couldn’t help but roll my eyes. Leave it to her to think she’d be exempt from a psychotic murderer.

“Who? Who is it?” Allison was nearing a complete panic attack at this point.

I was ready to end this whole thing and face the stupid consequences later, when he finally spoke up. He shook his head and pinched his eyes shut tightly with a sigh.

“It’s Derek.” He muttered, avoiding both mine and Stiles’ stunned expressions. “Derek Hale.”

What the hell was he doing? Derek is dead. And, not to meantion, pretty much the only person we know for sure isn’t the alpha. He must’ve lost his damn mind.

“Derek killed the janitor...?” Jackson narrowed his eyes at Scott skeptically.

Yeah, you’re onto something buddy. Maybe for the first time ever.

“Yes. He killed them. All of them.” He rushed the words out, still refusing to look at anyone.

My jaw clenched tightly. Why couldn’t we just tell them the truth? Would it really be that bad? They were already majorly freaked out. Might as well hit them with the supernatural shit too.

“But the mountain lion...” Lydia tried to reason.

“No. It’s been Derek the whole time. Starting with his own sister—”

“And the bus driver?” Allison was visibily calmer now that she had an answer, but her voice still shook with fear.

“And the guy at the video store. He’s in here with us, and—and if we don’t get out now...”

He finally raised his gaze to look around the room. His eyes were shining with several intense emotions including fear, anxiety, and guilt. He should feel bad. He just threw a dead man under the bus, and lied to his girlfriend in the process. It wasn’t going to end well on either account.

He let out a heavy sigh and carefully considered his next words before speaking. “He’s gonna kill us too.”

A moment of silence passed before Jackson scoffed in annoyance. “Call the cops.”

I had to agree that it seemed like the most logical choice at this point. I’m not sure what they’d be able to do, but they at least had more resources than any of us.

“No.” Stiles said immediately, shaking his head for good measure.

“What do you mean, no?” Jackson furrowed his eyebrows in disbelief.

“I mean no. What, do you wanna hear it in Spanish? No.” Stiles threw his hands down to his sides in frustration. “Look, Derek killed three people. We don’t know what he’s armed with.”

For some reason, his willingness to go along with Scott’s lie really bothered me. He was by far the most loyal person I’d ever met, so it wasn’t surprising, but it still didn’t sit well with me. Sometimes it was hard to distinguish the truth with them, and that made me nervous.

“Your dad is armed with an entire sheriff’s department. Call him!” Jackson raised his voice, his anger spiking at Stiles’ apparent hesitation to do anything helpful.

He had a point. I knew the last thing Stiles wanted to do was involve his dad in any of this stuff, but there came a time when we needed adults to step in. I’d say this was one of those moments.

“I’m calling.” Lydia pulled out her phone and began pacing away from their bickering.

“No! Lydia. Would you just hold on a second?” Stiles moved toward her, one arm outstretched, until Jackson stepped between them and shoved him away harshly.

“Hey!” Scott rushed to Stiles side, who just narrowed his eyes angrily.

Oh, God. The last thing we needed right now was a fight. They shouldn’t even be arguing about this, either. I didn’t care what it was, we just needed to do something—anything—to try and get out of here safely.

“Yes, we’re at Beacon Hills High School. We’re trapped and we need you to—but...” Lydia lowered her phone from her ear slowly in disbelief. “She hung up on me.”

“The police hung up on you?” Confusion seeped through my voice as I stepped toward her. Why would they do that?

Her eyes snapped up to mine, her bottom lip quivering. “She said they got a tip saying that there would be prank calls about the high school. She said if I called again, she’d trace the call and have me arrested.”

“Okay, so call again!” Allison cried from behind her, growing frantic again.

“No, they won’t trace a cell.” Stiles mumbled. “They’ll send a car to your house before anyone comes here.”

Once again, I was surprised at his level of knowledge about police procedures. Just how much had his dad let him in on?

“What the—what is this? Why does Derek want to kill us? Why is he killing anyone?” A stray tear escaped Allison’s eyes as they jumped around the room, hoping anyone could answer her questions.

They were all valid, and I felt terrible that she was so freaked out. Although, I had a feeling that knowing a werewolf was actually the one chasing us wouldn’t help to put her mind at ease. I wanted nothing more than to tell her the truth. What’s the worst that could happen, anyway?

“Why is everyone looking at me like that?” Scott asked upon noticing that all the attention was on him.

“Is he the one that sent her the text?” Lydia rushed the words out quickly, her eyes wide with fear.

“I don’t know.” Scott muttered through clenched teeth.

I wasn’t sure why they thought he’d have all the answers. I mean, he did have some kind of connection to the alpha, but they didn’t know that. To them, he should be as clueless as the rest of us.

“Was he the one that called the police?” Allison threw her hands up in exasperation as she desperately tried to piece any of this together.

“I don’t know!” Scott snapped, the sudden anger in his face immediately disappearing as he saw the way Allison recoiled from him.

Okay, this conversation was going nowhere, and fast. I grabbed ahold of Scott’s elbow and dragged him across the room as Lydia wrapped a comforting arm around Allison. Tensions were incredibly high right now, and everyone needed to chill the fuck out and stop fighting if we wanted to survive this.

“Okay, first of all.” I whispered with a raise of my eyebrows as Stiles quickly joined us. “Throwing Derek under the bus? Nice one.”

“I-I didn’t know what to say. I had to say something!” He tugged a hand through his hair as he tried to calm his breathing. “And if he’s dead, it doesn’t matter, right? Except if he’s not. Oh, God. I totally just bit her head off.”

He tried to sneak a glance at Allison over my shoulder but stopped when Stiles clasped a hand on his bicep. “And she’ll totally get over it. Bigger issues at hand right now. Like how do we get out of here alive?”

“But we are alive.” I cut in, voicing something that had been bothering me this whole time. “It could’ve killed us already. It’s like it’s...cornering us or something.”

“So, what? It wants to eat us all at the same time?” I glowered at Stiles for suggesting that ridiculous theory and he shrugged.

“No!” Scott whispered harshly. “Derek said it wants revenge.”

“Against who?” I couldn’t help but wonder which one of us could’ve somehow wronged the thing this badly.

“Okay, assheads!” I jumped as Jackson suddenly yelled and strode toward us with a scowl. “New plan. Stiles calls his useless dad and tells him to send someone with a gun and decent aim. We good with that?”

God, what was his problem with Sheriff Stilinski? He’d made so many comments about him recently. At this point, it was getting weird. Everyone looked to be in agreement, though, which wasn’t good for Stiles.

“He’s right.” Scott said, surprising both of us. “Tell him the truth if you have to. Just...call him.”

“I’m not watching my dad get eaten alive.” He insisted harshly with a twitch of his eyes.

“At this point, the alternative is that we get eaten alive.” I hissed, annoyed with all of this back and forth. We just needed to do something.

“Alright, give me the phone—” Jackson lunged forward, ready to call the sheriff himself.

I let out a yelp as Stiles reared back before landing a punch square on his jaw. Allison immediately rushed to his side as he fell to the floor, clutching his face. Scott put a hand on Stiles’ chest to hold him back, but he looked pretty satisfied with the damage he’d done.

I didn’t miss the way Jackson smirked to himself, seemingly getting exactly what he wanted. I realized at that moment that he’d been trying to provoke Stiles to this breaking point the whole night, and he’d finally succeeded. But why?

I’d never seen Stiles so much as kill a bug, let alone punch someone in the face. His dad was a really sore subject, apparently. He huffed out an irritated breath and begrudgingly yanked his phone from his pocket. Our gazes locked as the call went to his dad’s voicemail, his honey eyes shining with fear as he left a hasty message. 

We all jumped as the cafeteria doors started rattling violently. Allison and Lydia ran over to where we stood, hiding behind Scott and Jackson. My eyes grew wide as I watched the large bolts bending in the floor from the force the alpha was using to try and get in. 

“The kitchen.” Stiles pocketed his phone and strode over to my side. “The door in the kitchen leads to the stairwell.”

“Which only goes up.” I reminded him, my attention still locked on the doors. They wouldn't be able to hold back for much longer. 

“Up is better than here.” 

With that, we all took off running again. We stumbled up the stairs and into a random unlocked classroom, falling silent as we waited to see if the alpha had followed. Allison stood with her back against the wall just beside the door, Lydia and Jackson huddled close in front of her. Me and the guys stood on the other side of the doorway. 

I tried to steady my breathing as I watched the hallway closely through the small window in the door. Scott leaned toward it, trying to listen for footsteps, until Stiles fisted his jacket and jerked him back. A shadow moved across the glass, everyone visibly relaxing once it was gone. 

“Jackson.” Scott whispered. “How many can you fit in your car?”

“Five, if someone squeezes on someone’s lap.” He breathed, bracing his hands against the table behind him. 

“Five?” Allison snapped incredulously. “I barely fit in the back.”

“It doesn't matter.” I shook my head solemnly. “There’s no way we’re getting out without drawing attention.”

Now that we were on the second floor, our chances of escape had dwindled to almost none. There were no exits up here. We couldn't jump from any windows without getting seriously hurt. There really weren't many options. 

“What about this?” Scott suddenly jogged toward a door in the corner of the room, and we all followed. “This leads to the roof. We can go down the fire escape to the parking lot in, like, seconds.”

“That’s a deadbolt.” Stiles snarked and pointed to the spot that held the door firmly locked.

I rolled my eyes at his attitude. Scott was only trying to help. Now was not the time for his signature sarcasm. 

“The janitor has a key.” Scott looked hopeful at the realization. 

“You mean his body has it.” I corrected, my stomach twisting painfully at the memory that someone had died right in front of us tonight.

So much had happened since then. I hadn't even begun to process it. 

“I can get it. I can find him by scent, from the blood.” He leaned toward us as his voice dropped on the last sentence. 

“Well, gee. That sounds like an incredibly terrible idea. What else ya got?” Stiles quipped. 

I had to agree. While using the fire escape was probably our only hope at this point, going out there with the alpha was not a smart move. According to Derek, Scott is the one it wants. What’s to say it wouldn't just kill or take him on sight?

“I’m getting the key.” He insisted, his face tightening with determination. 

He pushed past us, heading straight for the door, until Allison stepped in his way. “Are you serious?” Her eyes welled with fresh tears and she looked up at him desperately. 

“It’s the best plan.” He tried to reassure her, but she just shook her head in disbelief. 

I mean, it was a dumb plan. But Scott could handle himself. He’s a werewolf. Someone had to do something already. I was about to go out there myself if we didn’t get a move on. 

“You can’t go out there unarmed.” She tried to reason with him, but his mind was already made up.

He looked around before pulling out a flimsy pointer finger on a stick. I tried my best to hold in a snort at the thought of him defending himself with that. Everyone just stared at him, and he shrugged. 

“It’s better than nothing.” 

“There’s gotta be something else.” Stiles said hopefully.

It was obvious that he didn’t want Scott going out there, either. I wouldn't say I was thrilled about it, but I knew that someone was going to have to make a sacrifice to get us out. He was the most obvious choice, plus he was willing. Who were we to stop him?

“There is.” Lydia glanced toward a cabinet filled with chemicals in various sized beakers behind me. I hadn't even realized we were in one of the chemistry labs. “In there is everything you need to make a self-igniting Molotov cocktail.” 

“Well, we don't have a key for that either.” I pointed out, turning around to inspect it. It didn’t exactly solve our problem. 

Jackson rolled his eyes with a huff and reluctantly stepped toward the glass case. With a scowl, he used his elbow to easily smash it to pieces. 

Well, there’s one way to do it. 

                                                 ————————

It had been nearly ten minutes, and there were no signs of Scott or the alpha. The five of us had barely spoken, simultaneously processing this insane situation and being too afraid to make any noise. The air between us was thick with tension. 

Allison had gone into full freak out mode when Scott left. She’d tearfully begged him not to leave, but he obviously didn’t listen. I understood her fear for his safety, but she had to know that it was our only hope. I had every bit of confidence in him. He would be able to get us out of this. 

Suddenly, an earthshattering growl echoed through the school. The floors beneath our feet shook with the sheer volume of it. Lydia winced and covered her ears as if the sound pained her. I glanced at Stiles, silently asking whether Scott could make that kind of sound. I’d heard him howl earlier, and it had been impressive, but it was nowhere near whatever the hell that was. 

I staggered back a step as Jackson unexpectedly fell onto his knees in front of me with a groan. He scratched at the back of his neck and began breathing heavily. Lydia and I grabbed each of his arms and hauled him back onto his feet as he continued wincing and moaning. He shoved us away, and I stumbled over my own feet. 

“Don’t. I’m fine.” He turned to face us, still rubbing at the spot where I knew Derek’s claws had dug into his skin not long ago. “Seriously, I’m okay.”

“That didn’t even look remotely okay.” I huffed, concerned. 

I mean, what the hell was that?

“Hey, what’s on the back of your neck?” Stiles peered over Jackson’s shoulder and stretched an arm out toward him.  

He swatted it away and avoided all of our eyes. There was no way that was normal. Why would he react that way to the alpha’s growl? It didn’t make any sense. 

“Well? It’s been there for days and you won’t tell me what happened.” Lydia crossed her arms skeptically. Clearly, it had been bothering her. 

“As if you actually care.” He barked harshly, and she looked away, tears glistening in her eyes. 

I was just about to lay into him for how not cool talking to her like that was, when police sirens sounded from outside. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief and ran toward the windows, before looking down to confirm that help was actually here. 

For the first time tonight, I felt myself relax. We were going to be okay. 

                                                  ————————

I pulled the sides of Stiles’ jacket tighter around myself, shivering against the frigid night air. My eyes were locked on him and Scott as they talked to the Sheriff. He was called away, and they continued whispering nervously. I would’ve preferred to be right there, listening, but Stiles said he’d drive me home. So here I stood, leaning against his Jeep. Waiting. Freezing to death. 

I let my eyes follow them as they walked over toward an ambulance that Scott’s boss was sitting inside of. I had to admit, his mysterious disappearance—and subsequent revival—was insanely suspicious. I wasn't entirely convinced that he was the alpha, but he wasn't exactly in the clear, either. 

After briefly talking to him, Scott and Stiles went their separate ways. Scott joined Allison, who had already told Lydia and I that she was going to break up with him. She was doubting pretty much everything about him after tonight, and I couldn't really blame her. He was keeping a huge part of himself secret, and it was pretty obvious at this point. I didn’t envy him having to figure a way out of that one.

“You could've gotten in.” I jumped at the sound of Stiles’ voice next to me, but forced myself to relax as he popped open the passenger door for me. 

I climbed inside, buckling my seatbelt just as he slid into the seat beside me. My house was only a few minutes away, and I already felt my anxiety rising at the thought of sleeping there by myself after everything that had just happened. Mom was working the night shift again. 

My fingers began trembling in my lap as the weight of tonight’s events came crashing down onto my shoulders. 

I felt Stiles’ eyes on me, but kept my head down. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” I sighed. It wasn't technically a lie. I was still breathing, and that counted for something. “I’m just not really looking forward to being home alone tonight.”

I felt heat crawl up my neck as I continued to avoid his curious gaze. I don't know what had compelled me to admit that. There was no reason for me to share that with him. I’d be fine. 

I finally looked at him as the car jerked to the left so quickly I nearly fell out of my seat. 

“What are you doing?” I balanced myself on the dashboard as we made a full 180 degree turn. 

“You’re staying over.” He’d said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world. 

I gaped at him, shocked that he would even suggest it. The last time we did that... “Stiles—”

“It’s okay.” He interrupted hastily, his fingers tightening on the steering wheel. “My dad won’t care.”

“Stiles...” I let myself trail off that time, not sure what I wanted to say. 

I didn’t want to be alone, and the last time we slept in the same bed, I’d had the best night of sleep since moving. It wasn't a bad idea per se, but...I don't even know. It was Stiles. And he made me nervous. 

“Look. It’s really for my benefit. I mean, that was terrifying.” He let out a sigh, trying to make that sound believable. 

“Nice try.” I scoffed, shifting back in my seat now that we were driving straight again. “You’re so not afraid of anything.”

He glanced at me briefly. “What makes you say that?”

“It’s true?” I finally looked at him again, studying the way his throat bobbed as he swallowed. I took a moment to admire the view I had of his profile. The yellow lighting of the street lamps outside beautifully highlighted the freckles that dotted his skin, and pulled out the natural orangey tint of his eyes. 

“You’ve had all this supernatural stuff thrown on you, and you’ve just accepted it like it’s no big deal. You’re always jumping at the chance to help, even though you’re human, and you’re usually the one who figures things out first. None of that strikes me as someone who’s easily scared.”

He looked at me with a small smile, his eyes trailing over my face appreciatively, and I felt my own lips tugging upward in return. 

About ten minutes later, I was following him into his bedroom. It was much cleaner than I expected. It was small, nothing more than a bed with a plaid comforter—of course—a couple of bedside tables with a small lamp, and a desk. He shut the door behind us, and we stood there for a moment awkwardly. 

I wasn't sure if I should sit on his bed or the plush chair in front of the desk. He was still by the entrance, one hand on the doorknob while the other rubbed at the back of his head. I made my choice and walked over to the bed.

I plopped down, tucking one of my legs beneath myself while the other dangled off the edge of his mattress. I let my toes brush against the cool hardwood floors as I watched him consider his options. 

After some hesitation, he moved to join me on the bed. He sat about a foot away, and I was simultaneously disappointed and grateful for that little bit of distance between us. He played with his fingers in his lap and avoided my eyes. 

“We could’ve died tonight.” I breathed, mostly wanting to break the silence but also just beginning to process everything. 

He looked up at me tenderly and reached a tentative hand forward to tuck a loose strand of hair behind my ear. “But we didn’t.”

“Don’t you find that weird?” My skin erupted with heat as he let the tips of his fingers linger on my neck. “I mean, the alpha had so many opportunities to kill us and it just...didn’t. It was almost like it was playing with us or something.”  

I could practically see the gears turning behind his eyes as he studied me for a moment. He parted his lips, and it looked like he was going to say something before thinking better of it. “We should get some sleep.”

“Or...we could do something else.” I rushed the words out before I could let any doubt creep in. His gaze quickly flickered to my mouth as I chewed on my bottom lip nervously. 

“Something else?” His voice was barely above a whisper as his eyes moved back to mine.  

“It’s just...” I swallowed, trying to gain the courage to say what had been swirling around in the back of my mind all night. “Our first kiss was at school. While being chased by a psychotic werewolf...”

“Yeah.” He breathed, chuckling quietly. “That’s not really how I imagined it.”

I blinked a few times, only just then noticing that we’d been moving closer together this whole time. “We could try again?”

There were only a few inches separating us now. Stiles’ eyelashes fluttered as he leaned forward and connected our lips gently. He tilted his head, slanting his mouth against mine, and I couldn’t help but arch into him as my eyes slid shut. The kiss was timid, just a bunch of barely there caresses as we slowly got more comfortable with each other.

We both pulled away fractionally, our noses still barely touching. I let out a shuddering breath as my anxiety slowly melted away. This was really happening.

“Was that better?” He murmured against me, his warm breath fanning my skin.

“Much.” My hands found the sides of his face and I pulled him back to me, locking our lips together again.

My mouth parted against his as one of his arms snuck around my back to bring me into his chest. His hands trembled against me and I felt my lips tug upward into a small smile, reassured that he was nervous too. I let my fingers trail toward the back of his head and tugged him impossibly closer. 

A soft gasp escaped me as one of his hands squeezed at my hip before dragging me on top of him. With my legs on either side of his, I suddenly realized how quickly this was moving and pulled away. My eyes fluttered open just in time to see Stiles pout with a hum of disapproval. He leaned forward to capture my lips again, but froze at the sound of his door being thrown open.  

“Oh, dear God. Son, really?” 

I scrambled off of him as my eyes landed on his father. He was still wearing his uniform, so he must’ve just gotten back. I smoothed down my clothes and crossed my legs, trying to make myself look more presentable.

“Um. It’s not—uh...what it looks like?” I cringed at that sorry attempt at defusing the situation, and cleared my throat. 

“Mr. Stilinski.” I greeted, hoping the twitch of my lips looked more like a smile than a pained grimace. 

His eyes narrowed at me before moving to Stiles, who was stiff as a board beside me. “Call me Sheriff. And get to bed.”

With that, he was gone just as suddenly as he’d appeared. I let out a sigh, deflating with exhaustion. I had been through way too much for one day. We shared a quick glance before Stiles turned off the lights.

We crawled beneath his comforter and followed his dad—I mean, the Sheriff’s—advice. Once again, I quickly fell into a peaceful, dreamless sleep.

Episode 7, Part One          Episode 8

[lycorogue]

Miraculous World: New York - United HeroeZ live-blogging (sorta)

Okay, it’s hard for me to live-blog everything I want to squee about, especially with the first watch. But I’m still wide awake and watching the re-air so let’s see how I do. (Turns out, I’m a slower typer than I thought and most of this was done post-watch again :P )

I absolutely love this special’s opening credits. It has a very Marvel feel. Nice.

Um... Uh... Did... Did Cristina Vee forget her Ladybug/Marinette voice over the break? I’m not liking this voice. I’m not liking it at all. STOP WITH THE VOICE! NOOOOOOO! (Also... Mr. Pigeon... Again? -_- )

Love that Adrien has started looking up the meaning of roses so he can find one Ladybug will actually accept. XD The boy tries so hard. <3

Hubby thought that Cristina might have decided to change up Ladybug’s voice so it’s not so obvious she’s Marinette (a la Batman) but the deeper voice is still here for Marinette. WHYYYYY!? The hiatus was clearly too long. She’s completely forgotten Marinette’s voice. OTL

Awww, Miss Bustier is pregnant!? She’ll be a great mom! eeeee

Also, smoooooooooth Marinette. Adrien is TOTALLY just a friend now... >_> Poor Luka. -_-

Also... ALYA’S VOICE IS WRONG TOO! WHAT THE HECK! WHYYYYYYYY. THIS IS SO AWESOME BUT I JUST CAN’T WITH THESE NEW VOICES! Everyone sounds deeper and gruffer... is that because the VAs are out of practice? Is it because they had to record at home with different equipment? What’s going on!?

Of COURSE Gabriel suspects a Miraculous in America. Good way to bring him to the States. At least Keith Silverstein remembered his Gabriel/Hawk Moth voice. I don’t know if I could have handled either Hawky or Adrien having the wrong tone of voice in this.

Oh. Oh no! Oh dear! Nathalie’s voice is the worst! At least hers can be explained away that she’s still recovering from the Battle for the Miracle Box but... *cringe*

KAGAMI’S OFF TOO! I think it’s 100% the actors not remembering the voices they used for these characters. -_- Such a shame. This movie is amazing, but the voices are so hard for me to get past. 

OMG, THE LITTLE CAT TO ALERT LADYBUG IS FLIPPIN’ ADORABLE! I’d hit the button a million times myself, so I feel ya, Chat Noir. Also, BRILLIANT play, Ladybug. :D

Equally brilliant plan on Plagg’s part. At least, it would have been if they were able to actually exercise it. Also.... WHERE DID THIS POWER OF FLIGHT COME FROM AND WHY DIDN’T THEY USE IT BEFORE!? >_> Me thinks the recipe for this power is magically going to be forgotten again once we get into the show proper.

Also, I know there will be salt thrown by the handful at Adrien after this special BUT THE BOY DIDN’T WANT TO ABANDON PARIS! He was going to stay and give up his class trip, but Plagg was right, when does Gabriel ever give him the freedom to do something like this? As someone who never got to go on any out-of-state (let alone out-of-country) class trips, I know how hard FOMO hits. If I had the chance, I would have jumped at it, ESPECIALLY after Plagg came up with a solid plan. EVEN SO, HE WAS GOING TO STAY! PLAGG CONVINCED HIM! And Plagg meant well. He wanted his kid to have a taste of freedom. Just... JUST LEAVE THESE TWO PRECIOUS BEANS ALONE, SALTERS!

UPDATE: The salters did NOT leave Adrien alone for this -_-

-_- And of course Luka’s voice is ALSO off. Still, my boy RACING A FRIGGEN BUS so Marinette can make the trip to NYC! SUCH A FRIGGEN GOOD BOI AND HOW CAN FANS HATE HIM HE’S JUST AMAZING AND *chef kiss* My heart just BREAKS for him though, because he’s sending his would-be girlfriend off on a weeklong class trip with her “former” crush and he KNOWS she’s still in love, but he’s not asking her to stay or pushing her to give up on Adrien and omg this kid is too pure my poor son!

UPDATE: So, apparently the hate mostly comes from Luka being - excuse the pun but - “one note” where as Kagami is more fleshed out and well rounded? Really? We know just as much about her as we do Luka. Just because we’ve seen Kagami flawed and we haven’t particularly seen Luka stumble that makes her more well-rounded? What if we just haven’t seen what Luka’s bad at? It IS possible to write someone whose flaws don’t necessarily come up often without them being some 2D Mary Sue. Give the writers (and Luka) a chance....

Awww. Adrien feeling guilty about leaving Paris and Ladybug. :’( But look at how cheered up he was just by SEEING Marinette! LOOK AT HOW HE RACED TO HER TO SEE WHERE SHE WAS SITTING!

Aaaaand then she panics. -_- This could have been Startrain all over again, but NOOOOO she’s now so focused on “he’s just a friend and I have to get over him” that she just has 0 chill around him anymore. -_- Go back to admitting you have a crush and just stumbling over yourself around him, huh?

(The Adrienette is STRONG in this scene though and I’m eating it up)

LOOK AT HOW DISAPPOINTED ADRIEN LOOKS SINCE SHE RAN OFF FROM HIM! WHYYYYYYY? And he has to be stuck sitting between his bodyguard and Mendeleiev. Poor kid doesn’t even have a friend to chat with on the long flight. TT3TT 

(So kind of serves Marinette right that she ALSO feels guilty about leaving Paris and now she has Mr. Damocles falling asleep on her instead of Adrien!)

I do appreciate that Cristina seems to be remembering Marinette’s voice more-or-less finally. Yay.

EEEEEE The sunset on the plane scene!!!!! <3 He speaks so softly to her and <3 <3 <3 (Also... Bryce Papenbrook seemed to have lost his Adrien voice in this recording... -_- )

UUUgh... was that still Ben Diskin doing Nino’s voice during the whole Operation New York dialogue with Alya? That didn’t sound anything like Nino! *sigh* Again, the main problem I have with this is the actors didn’t seem to get back into character before recording. Such a shame.

UPDATE: It was in fact NOT Ben Diskin anymore. :’( The new voice actor did well enough, but it just wasn’t Nino. I’m sure it will feel more like him the more I hear it, but I already miss the Southern Cali 90s Surfer Dude accent, even if it made no sense for a Gen Z Parisian to have it in the first place.

Awww, Mr. Damocles changing into his Knight Owl costume. <3 And then had to change back out of it. XD

They... actually named a superhero Uncanny Valley......

Knight Owl and Sparrow, AKA Batman and Robin.

“That’s just Captain Redlight directing traffic.” XD I mean, yeah, we have a lot of superhero characters but I think this is a bit much.

Alya oh so discretely pointing to Marinette as Nino directs Adrien to look out the window to see how beautiful NYC is. XD

AAAAAAND sliding doors vs Adrienette part 1. LOL I love how Aeon instantly figured out that Adrienette belong together.

Ooooooo Sabrina is gonna get herself an American boyfriend (And look at how jealous Chloe gets XD)

Adrien’s Soft Smile as Marinette realizes she was resting her hand on his stomach as she was hiding from Ms. Mendeleiev. So cute!

“Is it a bird?” “A plane” “No, it’s Hotdog Dan!” Oh. Em. Gee. Seriously? Ketchup Boy and Mustard Justice? Why!? Who came up with these code names!? XDDD

HOW DID NINO AND ALYA JUST RIP A HOTDOG IN HALF!?

eeeeeeeeeeeee THE FLOATING SCENE!!!!

Also, helium-voiced Nino commenting about his chick having wings <3

“Do you know this song?” I KNEW INSTANTLY WHERE ALYA WAS GOING WITH THIS AND I’M 100% HERE FOR IT. I AM SCREAMING!

Adrien’s soft asking Marinette to dance with him? He was practically PLEADING for her to say yes! And then she just scurries away from him!? And he grabs her hand to stop her from floating away. And then they just... nuzzle into each other as they dance and... yup. I’m screaming. <3 <3 <3 <3 (Also, the dance was at a party Chloe threw to prove to Adrien that she can be nice; it wasn’t her birthday, but I guess canonically it now was????)

Superheroes in America don’t have to hide their identities... perhaps someone should look into the comic book run of Avengers Civil War and decide if that’s a good thing... >_>

“I don’t mind being stuck with a friend like you” My heart is just flatlining. Like. ADRIEN, JUST SAY YOU ARE IN LOVE WITH HER ALREADY, OKAY!?

Jess and Aeon’s plan is as convoluted as one of Marinette’s XD I just love these two and I hope we see more of them.

Ah, Alya and Nino are good at manipulating their friends. 

Paris is under attack! Oh no! 0_0 

Ah, bargain-bin Doctor Octopus

After fully watching the special I know the answer, but when first hearing Sparrow I wondered if maybe Jess was genderfluid. Kind of a reverse of the Sailor Stars.

The transformation for the American heroes is both awesome and ridiculous and I love them.

“Marinette’s in danger” Adrien then INSTANTLY becomes Chat Noir to save her! <3 <3 <3 <3 I FREAKED when I first watched this part because I was afraid he might have spotted (excuse the pun) Marinette transforming. I was also curious how they were going to explain why they were in NYC. “I’ll explain later” is a good excuse. They are preoccupied by the villain and that gives him time to come up with a lie. Smart?

Aaaaand Cristina Vee forgot her Ladybug voice again. I hope this isn’t a new thing; switching up her voice for Ladybug. I’m not much of a fan, especially since she hasn’t always done it. :/

It kills me that Sparrow constantly comments about not calling for backup and gets in trouble for not calling when Sparrow DID try and the communicator was destroyed.

*flinch* The Chat Noir Cataclysm scene. My heart. It hurts. Poor Adrien. </3 All the guilt he has to hold for the majority of the second half of this thing.

EDIT: Totally forgot about the “American superhero gets understandably emotional over a loved one and smashes the villain through about half-a-dozen buildings with complete disregard for the collateral damage” trope.

Dollar Store Batman couldn’t figure out the manhole cover wasn’t in place. Whoops.

The breakdown scene where Ladybug lets Chat Noir know about how her powers work and how she can’t repair Paris. And Adrien giving up his powers. </3 And even though she’s so upset, and she felt betrayed by Chat Noir, the fact that she INSTANTLY yelled when she heard him renouncing his Miraculous and relinquishing it to Ladybug! And her TEARS as she realizes she lost him and won’t be able to return his Miraculous to him since she can’t even ask Fu to return it anymore!? Aaaaaaaaa! My heart!

“Gilbert?” XD I’m sorry but just hearing the poor little Eagle calling out the name is just too adorable.

ADRIEN WANDERING ALONE IN THE RAIN!? MARINETTE LOOKING ONTO THE CAT MIRACULOUS ALSO IN THE RAIN!? MY HEART IS BREAAAAAAAKINGGGGGG

The press conference requesting the NYC residents to stay inside until further notice. >_> Yeah... that... that might not work out so well if real life is any indication.....

“I wouldn’t have minded being stuck here a little longer with a friend like you.” >______< OH MY GOD, ADRIEN! (Also, Bryce lost his Adrien voice again... *sigh*)

Oh, and Marinette trying to chase him down to finally confess!? TT3TT

Oh man. Releasing a superhero from her fear of her powers. That can’t be.... yup. There goes like a dozen buildings in Manhattan.... -_-

Of course the POTUS is a superhero as well.... with access to weapons. Greaaaat. This isn’t a terrifying thought right about now.

I adore Sparrow. I ADORE SPARROW. I ABSOLUTELY FRIGGEN ADORE SPARROW!

About a million missile launchers hidden throughout the streets of NYC... >_< This isn’t hitting close to home or anything.

Eeeeeee. Marinette isn’t just unsure she can be Ladybug without A Chat Noir. She needs HER Chat Noir. She needs ADRIEN specifically. (Also, there goes Bryce once more forgetting his Adrien voice. Maybe he forgot what Adrien sounds like when he’s sad???)

UPDATE: Can we just talk for a minute the significance that Uncanny Valley - the superhero (accidentally) KILLED by Chat Noir (even if she was revived shortly after) - is the one happily returning Adrien’s superhero powers to him? How she has NO malice towards whatsoever towards Chat Noir? How SHE is the one to tell him that “to err is human”!? Beautiful! Love it! 

Nice. I liked that Uncanny can’t see the kwamis. Nice continuity.

THE LADYNOIR GLOMP! She was so afraid to never see him again. I LOVE how much this solidifies how important he is to HER, if not the team itself. 

The Americans being coerced by a foreign power to start a world war. -_- This truly is hitting too close to home right now....

Uh...How did Ladybug come up with the plan to trick Doorman to go to the Statue of Liberty? Both her and Adrien were already out of the room when he talked about the mystery of Eiffel’s safe inside the statue, and Marinette didn’t have any time to talk to Alya, so the two of them couldn’t have discussed how Doorman resisted figuring out this mystery because you don’t use your superhero powers for personal gain. Did she just luck into there being a mystery there that Doorman wanted to solve? Slight continuity issue there with the writing.... Whoops.

Awww, poor Doorman. He just wants to know the answer to the mystery!

Eagle’s transformation is so awesome! I love it. I love her. I want more of these American superheroes and wielders.

I love that Knight Owl and Sparrow are hand-me-down superhero titles! 

Oh my god, Hawk Moth slowly walking backwards dramatically from the window. XD WHY IS THIS MAN SO EXTRA AS WELL!? At least we know where Adrien gets it from. :P

I FORGOT ABOUT THE GORILLA! OMG! THAT IS AN AMAZING CALL BACK TO HIM! XDDD

So the American Miracle Box looks like it’s filled with Native American styled jewelry. So... are they based off the spirit totems!? I NEED TO KNOW MOOOOOOOORE!

UPDATE: Upon really paying attention to the opening credits, yes, the American Miraculous do indeed seem to be based off spirit totems.

I’m sure there’s more that I reacted to in real-time, but, as I mentioned at the top, I wasn’t writing fast enough to keep up with the pace of the show itself, so this is also largely by memory. :P Oh well. Always wanted to do a sort of reaction post about this series. One thing off the fandom bucket list, I guess.

[kasprzaks]

eddie kasprzak, reactionary extraordinaire

both   balloons   tethered   to   the   microfilm   recorder   now   read   ASTHMA   MEDICINE   GIVES   YOU  CANCER!   below   the   slogan   are   grinning   skulls. 

eddie’s characterisation flooding its way into the third person narrator in the book ESPECIALLY in eddie’s bad break is amazing and i’d die for it. his voice elsewhere in the book is very poetic and looks at things more conceptually than solidly, but the more of a grounding in this chapter while his head runs wild continues and tries to comprehend such a horrible conversation (specifically looking at his convo with mr keene in eddie’s bad break p2) succeeds so much to solidify him as a character outside of just what he says and does. i love it so here’s an entire collection that shows his reactions and the intensity he reaches as he buries himself in his brain in such a difficult situation and how it’s integrated into the prose in such a way we really feel like we’re living in his head despite the third person gap we have to cross to get there.

                 ‘Mr Keene,' he says, and his voice sounds distant to his own ears, without power. 'It was Mr Keene.'

                 'Not exactly the nicest man in Derry,' Mike says, but Eddie, lost in his thoughts, barely hears him.

... eddie always always has a whole thing of trying to be brave (and in this chapter he’s always saying something along the lines of what would big bill do?) but, in the process, manages to get so worked up he’s at a disconnect to what’s actually going on. as he starts to recall the memory with the rest of the losers 27 years later, he starts retreating into his own head because that’s simply how he is. he’s such a thinker that even the second he says it, he’s fading out. he barely hears him. this follows on as he recalls the memory and it’s contrary to the rest of the book where, normally, since we see eddie through someone else’s eyes (third person limited omniscient since the book is made up of multiple third person narrations), we only really see him being quiet as opposed to the actual physical disconnect we see when it is an eddie third person limited in complicated moments.

                 Mr Keene sat down in the swivel chair behind his desk and took one. Then he opened his drawer and took something out. He put it down next to the tall bottle of licorice whips and Eddie felt real alarm course through him. It was an aspirator. Mr Keene tilted back in his swivel chair until his head was almost touching the calendar on the wall behind him. The picture on the calendar showed more pills. It said SQUIBB. And —

                — and for one nightmare moment, when Mr Keene opened his mouth to speak, Eddie remembered what had happened in the shoe store when he was just a little kid, when his mother had screamed at him for putting his foot in the X-ray machine. For that one nightmare moment Eddie thought Mr Keene would say: 'Eddie, nine out of ten doctors agree that asthma medicine gives you cancer, just like the X-ray machines they used to have in the shoe stores. You've probably got it already. Just thought you ought to know.'

... he struggles to stay in the moment and this is just how he is his whole life. i’m gonna reference it chapter two for a second but the fact that his job in that version was a risk analyst? god send, they really hit the nail on the head for what they were trying to do in that interpretation there and i totally see how they got to it because risk analysing is just what he does. in this part where he sits down with mr keene, the convo hasn’t even begun. no one’s said a word and yet the second mr keene shows promise of saying anything, mr active imagination risk analyst eddie kasprzak has already thought up everything and dreamt himself into oblivion. scenarios exist without ever fully existing and in any given moment he’s already left reality and hopped onto another universe where the worst has just or will just happen.

                 Mr Keene wrapped a bunched, bony, liverspotted hand around the balloon and squeezed. The balloon bulged over and under his fist and Eddie winced, trying to get ready for the pop. Simultaneously he felt his breathing stop altogether. He leaned over the desk and grabbed for the aspirator on the blotter. His shoulder struck the heavy ice-cream-soda glass. It toppled off the desk and shattered on the floor like a bomb.

                 Eddie heard that only dimly. He was clawing the top off the aspirator, slamming the nozzle into his mouth, triggering it off. He took a tearing heaving breath, his thoughts a ratrun of panic as they always were at moments like this: Please Mommy I'm suffocating I can't BREATHE oh my dear God oh dear Jesus meekandmild I can't BREATHE phase I don't want to die don't want to die oh please —

                Then the fog from the aspirator condensed on the swollen walls of his throat and he could breathe again.

                'I'm sorry,' he said, nearly crying. 'I'm sorry about the glass . . . I'll clean it up and pay for it . . . just please don't tell my mother, okay? I'm sorry, Mr Keene, but I couldn't breathe —

... gets very caught up on one thing. he does this whole whole chapter. it goes on in the next quote here ...

                'Good,' Mr Keene said. 'We have an understanding. And you feel much better now, don't you?'

                Eddie nodded.

                'Why?'

                'Why? Well . . . because I had my medicine.' He looked at Mr Keene the way he looked at Mrs Casey in school when he had given an answer he wasn't quite sure of.

                'But you didn't have any medicine,' Mr Keene said. 'You had a placebo.A placebo, Eddie, is something that looks like medicine and tastes like medicine but isn't medicine. A placebo isn't medicine because it has no active ingredients. Or, if it is medicine, it's medicine of a very special sort. Head-medicine.' Mr Keene smiled. 'Do you understand that, Eddie? Head-medicine.'

                Eddie understood, all right; Mr Keene was telling him he was crazy. But through numb lips he said, 'No, I don't get you.'

... it’s hard to understand that this is the truth, let alone why he’s being told this. obviously eddie’s determined on the fact that he’s not crazy, but the main part up until this point i got caught up on was his continued disconnect and mostly passive not wanting to change at all attitude so he can get out of there. the numb lips and the references before to having his voice being distant, him constantly disappearing off into the tangents his head brings him on. there’s few and far between moments where he actually responds in between mr keene telling him what he’s telling him, and the prose between that is him thinking (panickingly thinking), filled with him trying to dream up other things and trying to ground himself in thinks he can compare the unfamiliar to. i especially love the cut in, in the first quote that sk puts through the whole book of another narration coming straight from eddie’s head. the stream of panic to really push it through.

                Eddie said: 'My medicine does so work.'

                'I know it does,' Mr Keene replied, and smiled a maddening complacent grownup's smile. 'It works on your chest because it works on your head. HydrOx, Eddie, is water with a dash of camphor thrown in to give it a medicine taste.'

                'No,' Eddie said. His breath had begun to whistle again.

                Mr Keene drank some of his soda, spooned some of the melting ice cream, and fastidiously wiped his chin with his handkerchief while Eddie used his aspirator again.

                'I want to go now,' Eddie said.

                'Let me finish, please.'

                'No! I want to go, you've got your money and I want to go!'                 ...                'I'm not crazy,' Eddie whispered, the words coming out in a bare husk.Mr Keene's chair creaked like a monstrous cricket. 'What?''I said I'm not crazy!' Eddie shouted. Then, immediately, a miserable blush rose into his face.

... the moment the panic finally takes over and becomes enough. strangely (thought it makes total sense when thinking about how internal eddie is versus when he’s finally had enough and gets pushed over the edge) he really does lash out. he’s immediately embarrassed that he’s done it, but he does do it. he switches from the passive life line carrying on in his brain he’s hoping will carry him out of the situation, and tries to get out of it before the emotional gets too much and really tries to put a stop to it. all in good time, too, because when eddie finally does leave ...

               Eddie's brain thudded and whirled. Oh, he felt sick, he felt very sick.                 ...                 He slipped it into his pocket and watched the traffic pass back and forth, headed up Main Street and down Up-Mile Hill. He tried not to think. The sun beat down on his head, blaringly hot. Each passing car threw bright darts of reflection into his eyes, and a headache was starting in his temples.

... emphasis on the sensory and the physical manifestations of his emotions. he feels so strongly and the physical ramifications comes as a result of his anxiety. his head aches, his ‘asthma’ is acting up. of course he takes his inhaler but a few moments later and ... 

              He looked fixedly at the aspirator, unaware of the old lady who glanced curiously at him as she passed on down the hill toward Main Street with her shopping basket over her arm. He felt betrayed. And for one moment he almost cast the plastic squeeze bottle into the gutter — better yet, he thought, throw it down that sewer– grating. Sure! Why not? Let It have it down there in Its tunnels and dripping sewer-pipes. Have a pla–cee-bo, you hundred-faced creep! He uttered a wild laugh and came within an ace of doing it. But in the end, habit was simply too strong. He replaced the aspirator in his right front pants pocket and walked on, hardly hearing the occasional blare of a horn or the diesel drone of the Bassey Park bus as it passed him. He was likewise unaware of how close he was to discovering what being hurt — really hurt — was all about.

... this is straying away from the actual point of the post slightly, but, as it says, habit remains too strong. he’s a character that almost always returns to the ‘comfortable’, though familiar is actually a much better word for it. to return to the point of the post in regards to this, though this time the technique isn’t exclusive to eddie centric chapters, all of the losers get cut in moments of it, i especially love eddie’s thought process tied into this moment straight up verbatim. though it’s tragic that he doesn’t follow through and chuck the aspirator down the drain (though completely understandable too), this moment ties into everything else we see of the intricacies of eddie’s inner world and how it’s obviously a full one. he really does live up there. humouring any and all possibilities no matter how out there or terrible they may seem is something that he constantly does, it’s who he is. eddie lives in the hypothetical. i think this chapter really demonstrates that and lets eddie’s discomfort become so overwhelming that it’s so difficult to even pay attention to what’s going on which totally brings us into eddie’s psyche. concentrating is difficult when you could run upstairs and live there. it’s comfortable, it’s familiar, and it doesn’t really hurt as much as the real.

[winterironspiderling]

For the prompt list: 99 and 85 are two I would love to see. 99 takes priority though. I love your writing btw! 😁❤️

Thank you for the compliment! I did 99 with WinterSpider, and I’ll do 85 with Starker in a separate post. :) Conveniently, 99 was requested twice!

“Would it help if I stayed?”

Rated Teen, Hurt/Comfort, mention of a car accident.

Peter had clocked the car going just a little bit too fast all the way from his perch on the rooftop. He swung down with practiced ease, flipping off the end of his web with a flourish and landing in front of the car right before it collided with the passing bus.

He took the impact of the crash, and set the car down on the road as gently as he could. A quick glance let him know there were three people in the car, including the driver.

The car’s front end was crumpled and would be totalled according to the insurance companies, but he’d stopped dozens of crashes like this before. He’d done all the calculations in his head and known that with the way the car was heading into the bus, the three in the car would’ve been dead, and one or two from the bus. Had he not intervened.

Peter rushed to check if everyone was okay, expecting not to have any issues, but something was wrong.

The woman behind the wheel was slumped forward. He could smell the blood before he saw it dripping from her nose.

Peter ripped off the door, and Karen was already calling for emergency services.

“No, no, no. I don’t understand,” Peter murmured.

The children in the backseat were crying.

“She’s still breathing,” Peter realized. “She’s still breathing!”

He had Karen run an analysis to make sure the lady was safe to move, and then he pulled her out of her seat.

There was only so much he could do, though. He was smart but didn’t have any medical training beyond CPR, but was that even what she needed? She was unconscious, not dead.

Peter panicked. He would’ve been willing to lift the mask to save her, but he didn’t know what saving her entailed.

“Karen, what do I do?” Peter cried.

“She is unconscious, Peter. Paramedics are on the way.”

“I know, but what do I do?” Peter put his hands up to his face. The crying from the kids in the backseat was drowning out all his other senses. Now, a crowd was gathering, watching him fail.

Finally, the paramedics arrived.

“I’m sorry,” Peter said. “I’m sorry. I stopped the crash,but I—I think she hit her head.”

“Would’ve been worse if they’d hit the bus,” the paramedic replied in a clipped tone.

Peter went to help the kids out of the backseat, but they recoiled from him, terrified.

“It’s okay, I’m Spider-Man. I’m here to help,” Peter tried. His voice came off as manic instead of reassuring.

Peter backed away. Obviously he was doing more harm than good here. He’d been patrolling for over three years, and he’d gotten into sticky situations, but he’d never lost anyone before. Was she going to be okay? Did he just orphan two kids?

He had to get out of there.

He cut patrol short and went back home to his apartment. Some days were harder than others, and this was a hard one.

His ears were ringing, even the sound dampeners in the suit hadn’t been enough to quell the sound of screaming kids and sirens. The chattering of the crowd watching him fail.

Peter took off the suit and threw it aside. He disappeared under his comforter and squeezed his eyes shut.

Peter couldn’t get his thoughts to calm down no matter what he tried. Was that woman okay? Thoughts of the ferry incident and Tony having to come and rescue him pervaded his mind. Was that all he was, even with the new suit? A screw up?

He didn’t fall asleep, but he hid in his bed for over an hour until the ringing in his ears quieted. A knock at the door was the last thing he wanted, but it was better than the ringing, so he decided not to ignore it.

Peter pushed his blankets away and walked to the door in his boxers . Probably May coming over to check on him

He unlocked the door and pulled it open only to be greeted by Bucky.

“Bucky. What are you doing here?”

He took in the man’s outfit. Much different from what he usually wore when they interacted. Peter had been on missions with him before and trained with him at the compound. They were friendly, but not house-call friendly.

“I was in the area.”

“Oh,” Peter said. “Uh. Come in I guess.”

“Thanks,” Bucky said politely.

The corner of Peter’s mouth lifted up a little bit at that. Bucky’s reputation was way darker than his actual personality.

Peter would’ve offered the guy a drink, or a snack, or something, but it occurred to him that he was almost naked.

“I, uh, I’ll go put something on.”

Bucky nodded. He stayed standing by the door to the apartment. Baseball cap, red henley, jeans, and all. Nothing like the murder costume he usually wore. Peter liked him like this, but still didn’t understand what the hell he was doing there, and why he’d chosen now of all times to visit.

Peter was tempted to put the Spidersuit back on so he could even the status quo of the impromptu encounter, but he didn’t want to look at it quite yet. He opted for his school sweatshirt and jogging pants.

He made is way back into the living room and plopped on the couch.

“You can sit,” Peter said. It was weird that Bucky didn’t do anything he wasn’t told to, but he was a polite person.

Bucky sat on the same couch, leaving a space between them.

“So, what brings you to Queens?” Peter asked.

“Wanted to see how you were doing.”

“I’m good,” Peter lied. “How’re you?”

Bucky ignored the question. “You don’t look so good.”

Peter frowned. “Thanks?”

Bucky sighed. “I saw what happened today.”

“How?” Peter wondered.

“The news.” Bucky shifted in his place.

“Okay.” What do you want?

“How are you doing?”

Peter looked away. Typical. He’d graduated from being under Tony’s watchful eye to being under Bucky’s. Did everyone watch the news to see him make mistakes?

“Shitty,” Peter admitted.

Bucky nodded like he approved of the honesty.

Peter let his expression change to reflect how he felt inside. Miserable.

“I did everything right.” Peter’s voice broke. “I don’t understand what happened. I don’t even know if the lady is okay…and the kids. I can still hear them crying.”

“It wasn’t your fault,” Bucky said. “I watched the clip. Ifyou hadn’t been there, it would’ve been worse.”

“That’s what the paramedic said, but I don’t know. I must’ve grabbed the car wrong. If I hadn’t flipped when I came down…I could’ve been a second earlier.” Peter shook his head.

“You’ve been Spider-Man for so long,” Bucky began. “I’m kinda surprised something like this hasn’t happened sooner.”

Peter frowned. “What kind of advice is that?”

Bucky shook his head. “I mean you can’t save everyone.”

“I’ve saved everyone so far,” Peter replied. “I’ve dealt with guns and knives, and bombs. You’ve seen it yourself. I never lose anyone.”

“Maybe you still haven’t,” Bucky said.

“I’m scared to find out what happened,” Peter said. “You didn’t see the look on those kids’ faces.”

“They would’ve looked worse if they’d crashed,” Bucky countered.

Peter shrugged.

“Anyway.” Peter waved. “Why did you come? No offense, but we’ve never really hung out before, and I know you weren’t just in the area.”

Bucky looked away for a moment. “I get alerts on my phone. I sort of keep tabs on everybody.”

Peter raised his eyebrows.

“I watched the clips, and I could tell that you were freaking out,” Bucky explained. “I’ve never seen you act like that before, so I don’t know. Thought I’d come by.”

“Oh.” That was actually really nice of him. If Bucky had noticed him acting like that, then how many others had? How embarrassing.

“It wasn’t obvious,” Bucky added. “I could just tell ‘cause I know you.”

“Right.”

Bucky nodded again. “I’ll check now to see if there are any updates on that lady, okay?”

Peter nodded. He was glad Bucky was there to do it. He didn’t know what he’d do if he checked the news just to find out that she’d died. It would be all his fault.

Peter held his breath.

“No news,” Bucky announced with a grimace. “She’s still under.”

Peter leaned forward and put his head in his hands. “This is all my fault. I really did it this time. I don’t deserve the suit.”

“Whoa, Pete,” Bucky said, voice surprised. “You can’t say that.”

“It’s true.” Peter spoke into his hands. “What if she dies, Bucky? Her kids are all alone and scared…I probably looked like a freak to them. The last thing they needed.”

“Hey.” Bucky sounded uneasy. “None of this is your fault. How many people would be dead if you weren’t there patrolling? I would probably be dead if you weren’t on the team watching my back. Remember last year?”

Peter really didn’t want to cry, not in front of Bucky. Bucky had been through more than anyone he knew, and he didn’t cry.

“My parents died in a car crash too.” Oh shit. Now he was dry heaving. He should’ve known not to bring that up. “What—what if I—”

Peter was really crying now. He registered Bucky moving closer to him and putting his arms around him uncertainly. Peter leaned into the man’s embrace. If Bucky had come to check on him, then he might as well make it worth his while.

“Do you need me to call anyone?” Bucky asked, voice full of concern. “Can I do anything?”

Peter clutched Bucky’s shirt. He’d have to get him a new one even if the snot and tears were washable. He was crying too hard to speak.

“Would it help if I stayed?”

“Y-yes,” Peter managed. “Please.”

“You got it, Pete. I’ll stay. As long as you want.”

Peter knew he and Bucky weren’t close enough for this to be appropriate, but the man was just so warm and inviting. Peter wanted to keep some semblance of dignity for himself, so he backed away as soon as his sobbing calmed down, wiping his face on his sleeve.

“I’m sorry.” Peter ducked his head. “I didn’t mean to.”

“No harm done,” Bucky said. “I came here to check on you, and I’m glad I did. I would hate to think of you being here all alone like this.”

“Still. It’s embarrassing,” Peter admitted. “I just…the heightened senses are sort of a package deal with heightened emotions, too.”

“Even if that wasn’t the case…you don’t have to apologize for crying.”

“Everyone already thinks of me as a little kid. Youngest one on the team. Nobody else cries like this over an accident.”

“Not that you see,” Bucky argued. “And I don’t think of you like that.”

“Yeah, but you came here to check on me. You wouldn’t have done that for anyone else.”

“You’d do it for me. You have.”

“That’s different,” Peter argued. “You got shot.”

“Seeing people hurt is like bullets to you.”

Peter frowned.

“Besides,” Bucky said. “Everyone else has people to check upon them. We don’t.”

“I guess.” Peter wiped his face on his sleeve again. “Thank you,” he added. “It does suck being here alone most of the time.”

“I know how you feel.” Bucky leaned forward and wiped a straggling tear from Peter’s cheek.

Peter nodded. It really was nice to have Bucky there with him. He was such a quiet and calm presence. Large but not overbearing. Just safe.

“I’ll get you some water,” Bucky said. “Then I’ll check the news again.”

“Okay,” Peter agreed.

He used the opportunity to blow his nose and make sure he didn’t look disgusting. Now that he’d taken the edge off with a good cry, the feeling of excitement that Bucky was in his apartment came to the forefront ofhis mind. Bucky cared about him.

Bucky came back with a smile on his face. “Look.”

Peter stared at the phone with wide eyes. A new viral video of the woman from the car wreck with her kids beside her in the hospital bed thanking him for what he’d done.

Peter almost cried again in relief.

Bucky didn’t say anything, but he looked pleased.

“Thank God,” Peter breathed. “I can’t believe it.”

“Well, pal, I guess I should go then since you got nothing to worry about.”

“What?” Peter asked. “You don’t…you don’t have to go. I mean, unless you want to. I—you can still stay.”

Bucky smiled. “Let’s get something to eat, then. I think you could use it.”

“Okay.” Peter leapt up off the couch, his mood vastly improved. He hadn’t killed anyone. That was as good of a reason as any to be happy. “I’ll get you a different shirt too since I sort of wrecked yours.”

Bucky followed him into the bedroom this time. He took his dirty shirt off. “You sure I’ll fit? You’re kinda tiny.”

“I wear my clothes baggy.” Peter turned around while he answered, his breath getting caught in his throat at the sight of Bucky, shirtless.In his room. “Um. Here you go.” He grabbed blindly in his closet and ended up selecting a shirt with a science pun that totally wasn’t Bucky’s style.

Bucky put it on with a grin.

 “Thanks again for coming,” Peter said once he was locking the door to his apartment with Bucky at his side.

“Thanks for letting me stay.”

Peter already had a crush, and this was not helping those feelings go away. He’d already embarrassed himself enough. Go big or go home,right? And he’d already locked the door, so…

He stood up on his tippy toes and kissed Bucky on the mouth.

“Sorry,” Peter offered. Was he really sorry, or just using that as a balm in case Bucky wasn’t happy about it? Both, probably.

“Don’t be,” Bucky said. His cheeks were rosy which Peter found to be the absolute cutest thing.

Bucky reached his hand out, and Peter took it. Somehow the worst day had turned into the best one.

[hangovercurse]

Worst First

You and Colson go on Worst First with Brittany Furlan and Tommy Lee.

Request: “Have Colson(mgk) and reader (who are dating) go on worst first with brittany furlan(lee).LOVE YOUR WORK!!!❤❤”

Colson X Reader

Warnings: Cursing, talk of sex (no actual smut)

A/N: reposting this because I couldn’t figure out how to tag the person who submitted this

Word Count: 1684

“Hello all you fine folks out there and welcome back to Worst Firsts. Boy oh boy do we have the show for you today. First off, we have my husband, Tommy Lee, with us here.” Colson banged on the table as you gave out a small cheer. Brittany continued, a small laugh sent in your direction, “We brought our favorite Tommy Lee two-point-O Machine Gun Kelly back on the show today!” You cheered for your boyfriend as Tommy banged on the table. “And for her first time on the show, we have the wonderful Ms. Y/N Y/L/N!” Colson shouted for you as Tommy continued banging on the table. “Thank you guys so much for coming, thank you for coming back Colson. I am so excited you guys are here today.”

“I love bein’ here.” Colson said into the mic, shooting Brittany a smile.

“When you asked us to come on, I was so fucking excited.” You said, Colson nodding with you.

“For real, bro. She was off the walls.”

Brittany continued, speaking to her audience, “If you guys didn’t know, Gunner here played Tommy in The Dirt way back in 2019, which released right before you two met, am I right?”

You smiled lightly, a slight heat rushing to your cheeks as the focus turned to you and Colson. Luckily, he answered for you, “yeah, we met literally like maybe 3 days after the premiere. That was such a sick time in my life.”

“Dude, I bet. You release a kick ass movie and then turn around and meet-“ Tommy started, Colson cutting him off to finish his sentence.

“The love of my life, yeah.” You smiled bashfully, Colson’s arm finding its way around you and pulling you into his side.

Brittany smiled at you two, Tommy’s hand reaching over to grab hers under the table. “So, this show is all about first times and, while normally we would talk about worst firsts, I gotta know how you two met.”

“It’s honestly not much of a story,” you began, “Netflix had this party and we were both invited because we both had movies out on Netflix. I went up to him at the bar because I thought he was hot and we started talking and now, uh, we’re here.” Colson nodded as you recounted the memory.

“I was trying so hard not to fuck anything up though, because literally the entire night before she came up to me, I was trying to figure out how to talk to her.” Your boyfriend said, red on his cheeks.

Brittany sent you a mischievous smile, “so what happened after that? Did you give him your number, did he ask you out, something else?” The inflection in her voice and the wiggle of her eyebrows let you in on exactly what else she thought you might have done.

“Something along the lines of something else.” You said, a smile playing on your lips. Colson threw his head back in laughter. Tommy nodded with pride at you two.

‘Speaking of something else.” Colson began, making you look up to him in both confusion and panic, “This is all about worst firsts, right?”

“What are you about to say?” You asked him, a warning in your voice.

He giggled, “remember the first time we had sex in public?”

Brittany’s eyes went wide, “you two did what?”

Tommy asked, “first time?”

You leaned into Colson’s side, a blush rising to your face. “That was literally the most awkward experience of my entire life.”

Colson laughed at the expressions of the older couple, “okay, basically we were on tour in the middle of butt fuck nowhere and there was nothing in this town. No bars, no clubs, nothing.”

You continued his story, “but there was this tiny carnival. So, after the show we went in hope of something fun happening.”

Tommy laughed, “well something fun certainly happened.”

“After about an hour in we were bored and she was only gonna be on tour for a few more days.” Colson said, “so we figured we should make the most out of the lame ass carnival. And then we found it.”

“the photobooth.” You said, watching Brittany’s jaw drop.

“Him, I expect this from.” She pointed at Colson, “but you?”

You giggled, nodding your head, “It was her idea!” Colson exclaimed over your laughs.

“I hadn’t seen him in almost two months and was only on tour for two weeks, I had to make up for lost time and this was the only place that we could get any semblance of privacy.” You said, shoving Colson lightly as he grinned proudly at you.

“Wait so did you two get caught?” Tommy asked, intrigued.

Colson answered, “we didn’t get caught, per say, but as we were leaving this family came up to the booth. And I mean, there’s not a great way to hide that you’ve just had sex. We tried, but people still know.”

Brittany and Tommy laughed, the latter banging his hand on the table as he did so. “The look on that mother’s face. I thought she was gonna call the cops or something.” You said.

“Was it at least good?” Brittany asked to which Colson replied,

“we were in a photobooth, Brittany. No.”

Tommy chuckled, “I’m sure it was better than doing it on the tour bus.”

Your eyes went wide and a laugh tumbled from your mouth as you recalled the first time you and Kells had had sex on the tour bus. “We do not need to talk about that.” He looked down at you as he spoke, a look of warning in his eyes.

“Oh yes we do.” Brittany said, looking at you to speak.

“There’s not much to it, but as I’m sure you can imagine, the bunks are not the most spacious of beds. And Colson here is a six-foot-four giant who barely fits in the bunk as it is.” You began, giggling as Colson’s glare hardened on you. “Let’s just say Kells almost got a concussion because he hit his head so hard.”

Brittany laughed as Tommy spoke, “sex in the bus is difficult, dude. I get it.”

“Why didn’t you just go on top?” Brittany asked you.

Colson grumbled, “because she was “tired from her flight” and “didn’t want to get hurt.”” He used air quotes as he mimicked your words from the night, making Brittany and Tommy laugh.

“I sat on a plane for 9 hours to see you, the least you can do is top.” You said, shrugging as Colson let out a silent chuckle. “But yeah, it was not good.”

You continued to talk about other first times you’d had. You told the couple about your first kisses when you were younger, retelling the story of your first kiss in middle school when your braces got stuck on the poor kid’s lip.

Then Colson recounted the story of the first time you both went out on a boat together. “For context,” you started, “I am terrified of the ocean. I can swim but I refuse to go into any water that isn’t a pool.”

“We were out there with a couple of our friends and she was staying as far away from the edge of the boat as possible. And then some of our homies tried to pull her towards the edge and she freaked the fuck out.”

You pouted, “you fucking laughed the entire time it was not funny.”

“It was!” He exclaimed, “you were pulling away like a little kid.” You glared at him, “but, for the record because people are gonna think I’m a bad boyfriend, I made them stop. And then I dragged her towards the edge myself and made her sit with me.”

You then told the story of the first time you’d gotten a call from the hospital to come get Kells. “I was unaware that this was a normal thing. So, when I get a call at 4 am that he’s in the ER I was kind of freaking out. And then I get there and him and Rook are just sitting there messing around like two little kids.”

Colson chuckled, rubbing his face with his hands, “you were so worried when you first came in and then as soon as you saw us you got so annoyed.”

“What did you guys do that got you in the ER?” Brittany asked.

You deadpanned, “they were throwing knives around and Colson nearly cut off his finger.”

Tommy nodded, “nice.”

After a few more firsts, Brittany asked the final first worst, “what was the first or worst fight you guys got in?”

You looked at your boyfriend, trying to figure out what fight he’d pick. “The first big fight we got into was that night at the hospital that we mentioned earlier.” He said and you nodded in agreement. “Which I was totally in the wrong about.”

“Yeah. We got home and I literally couldn’t talk to him without wanting to scream.” You said.

Tommy tilted his head, “were you mad that he had gotten hurt or that he called you so late?”

You shook your head, “I was more frustrated than anything. Like I was fucking panicking because I thought something really bad had happened and he was treating it like a joke. But we talked about it and obviously we’re fine now.” You said smiling up at your boyfriend.

He grabbed your hand under the table, squeezing gently. “Yeah. That was also the first night I told you I loved you.” He said, nudging your shoulder with his own.

You rolled your eyes, nudging him back, “yeah, yeah. Don’t get all sentimental on me now.” You said, giggling silently.

Brittany and Tommy watched you, smiling like proud parents. “Alright folks, we’re gonna end this podcast here. Thank you guys so much for tuning in, thank you guys for coming.” She motioned to you two, “It’s always so nice to see you guys, love catching up with you. If you’re not already subscribed, you should do that. Leave a like, a comment, whatever you want.”

[tyrustrash]

Hoodie Stealer

TJ woke up to the sound of his annoyingly loud alarm clock, which isn't even a real clock, more so the alarm on his phone. After turning off the alarm, he sits up and rubs his eyes in an attempt to wake up. Yawning, he stretches his arms. Looking around his room, he smiles at the mess. His room has clothes scattered all over the floor, dresser drawers wide open, and sport related material preventing any sort of easy movement. He has always been the odd one out in his family when it comes to cleanliness. Something about messes and the stench of the mixture of body oder and sweat didn't bother him. His mother's constant nagging to clean his room never did anything other than wanting him to make it a bigger mess. His room is a complete opposite of his sister's. Whenever he has to enter his sister's room, he enters a mini state of shock. Her room is so pink that it's literal kryptonite. Stuffed animals and dolls lined up the walls, posters of boy bands on the ceiling so that would be the last thing she sees before she sleeps, and all the trophies from ballet on her desk. TJ thinks that their parents are prouder of her than him because he never has won anything for basketball. Although they tell him all the time that trophies don't matter, they don't act that way when his sister gets another one. Finally getting off the bed, TJ steps on a stray lego from his dinosaur set. His face turns red, nearly swearing, which would've ended up in more pain if his mother heard. He simply kicks it under the bed. The path to his closet wasn't much easier. Random basketballs had to either be stepped over or kicked to the side. Even though he admits his room is a total mess, it's his mess. He finds comfort in there where others might faint from the smell. To him, this is his castle and he has control over how it is kept. However, Cyrus has everything to do in how the castle looks. Whenever Cyrus comes over, TJ suddenly turns into The Flash and cleans his room. By clean, he means shoving everything under the bed and using a can and a half of air freshener, the berry scented kind. It's worse when Cyrus comes over unannounced. TJ's gets too caught up in the moment seeing his friend take the time to surprise him, then freaks up because he hadn't prepared his room yet. He ends up making some excuss for Cyrus to stay downstairs for a minute while he fixes his room. Opening his closet, TJ looks through his collection of hoodies. Nothing really stood out to him for today. No special event or anything, it's only chocolate chocolate chip muffin day. So, you know, the best day ever. Throwing random hoodies to the already clothes filled floor, TJ started to get flustered at not finding the right one. He shuts the closet door. He drops to the ground and begins going through the hoodies that were already on the floor. Sure, it wasn't the most sanitary choice, but it's worth it if he finds the perfect one. Besides, it's not just muffin day, it's also the day he and Cyrus are set to attend the dinosaur museum after shool as a treat for getting through lunch detention yesterday. Upon reaching the third pile, the top hoodie stood out to him. It's cyan with a penguin eating a popsicle while saying "chill out" on the front. Smiling from adorableness, he put it on. It was a little snug on him, but figures he was growing out of it. Doesn't matter because he knows Cyrus will like it. After the nerve wrecking drive to school, he was finally able to leave his talkative sister that pratically wished he could ride the bus. He walks into the school and sees Cyrus at his locker. He waves and walks towards him, but Cyrus doesn't notice and walks away. Later at lunch, TJ stands in line. Andi, Buffy, and Jonah are behind him, talking secretly. Buffy nods her head, resulting in Andi to tap on TJ's shoulder. He turns around and notices them smiling. "Yes?" They all grin harder, somehow seeming like they were enjoying something. Andi clears her throat. "Um. Where did you get that hoodie?" All TJ does is shrug. He really doesn't remember the details of all 562 hoodies he owns. So why would he remember this specific one. "On my floor." "What?" Jonah asks. "Doesn't seem like the kind you would own." Buffy says. She pulls out her phone and opens her messages with Cyrus and starts typing. "Did someone give it to you?" Before he could answer, it was TJ's turn for food. He grabs his tray along with two muffins, ignoring the groans from other students. He heads to his usual spot he shared with Cyrus. After waiting for sixteen minutes, TJ had already eatin his food, except for one of the muffins. The frown on his face couldn't get any lower even if he tried. Cyrus had never missed lunch with him since they started eating together, heck, Cyrus even joined him in lunch detention. When the bell went off, he threw the trash away and carries the muffin to his next class. On the other side of the school, Cyrus was being comforted by his friends. He's stressing out and over-thinking the situation like he always does. When Andi had told him that TJ's wearing his hoodie, he lost it. That's when he remembered he had left it at TJ's house the other day, but he would never expect him to wear it. Was it a sign that the jock likes him more than a friend, or thinks that they're already something more? "Calm down." Andi tells him. She places a hand on his shoulder to comfort him. "He might think that it's one of his." "Yeah right." Jonah interferes. "We've seen his style. He was just playing it off. He totally knows it's Cyrus' and is crushing on him." With that, Cyrus freaks out even more. His knees weaken and falls back on the lockers. "Don't talk like that! He doesn't even know that I'm gay! And besides, he's straight." All three raise their eyebrows. Buffy chuckles a bit. "Wanna rethink that?" "He plays sports, therefore he is straight." Jonah shakes his head. "Buddy, we've noticed how he is around you." "Yeah, he's different." says Andi. "He seems happier around you, like he's more open about himself that he can't be any other time. You even said you're the only person he can talk a certain way with. Although he's not the smartest guy in school, he must know that that hoodie is yours and is wearing it for a reason. He must like you. That, or he just wants a way to show off his abs without breaking the dress code. Because, let me tell you, that hoodie is tight on him." "He has abs?" Cyrus gasps. He starts panicking again. "I can't handle it." Buffy sighs and picks up her friend. "Just go talk to him and try figuring things out." "But where do I start?" "Just tell him that he's wearing your hoodie that you left behind. Then engage in simple conversation to figure out his feelings." Cyrus thinks for a second. On one hand, there's a chance that TJ likes him. On the other hand, he might just make a fool out of himself. "Fine." Once school ended, TJ stands at the flagpole, waiting on Cyrus so they can walk to the museum. He still is holding the muffin from lunch. His frown has gone away, well just barely. The thought of them enjoying the museum was on his mind. Cyrus walks out of the school and notices TJ. He nearly chokes as he confirms that TJ is wearing the hoodie he left behind. He moves closer, but slowly as he hasn't fully prepared himself. His fingers are shaking, knees still slightly weak, and head feels like it's spinning. He manages to stand in front of TJ, who is now grinning like it's the only thing he knows how to do. "Hey, Underdog." Cyrus gulps, for once silent out of fear. He opens his mouth to speak, but the words seem to the broken and barely understood. "My hoodie." "What?" The confusion on TJ's face wasn't anything new. "You're wearing my hoodie. I left it at your house yesterday." "Oh, that's why it's tight." TJ takes the hoodie off and hands it to Cyrus. All Cyrus managed to do was stare at his friend, who really did have abs. TJ pulls out another hoodie from his bag and puts it on. "Good thing I always carry a backup hoodie for emergencies." Cyrus mumbles, "Yeah." "Ready to go?" Cyrus blinks rapidly. "Huh?" "To the dinosaur museum." "Yeah, that." The two start walking. Along the way TJ hands Cyrus the muffin and eats it. The two couldn't stop making cheesy dinosaur jokes that dads would tell. Time went by and they were soon standing in front of the museum doors. TJ looks at Cyrus. "Ready for our first date?" In shock, Cyrus looks at him. TJ has his arm reached out, to which Cyrus accepts with a smile. The two walk in, holding hands.

[puckinghell]

Slow Dancing in a Parking Lot | Jeff Skinner

Summary: The song “slow dance in a parking lot”. No I will never stop writing based on country songs.  Word count: 2k Note: This is just pure fluff. Alcohol tw

Back to back games were always exhausting and with the second half of it coming tomorrow, it really wasn’t the best night for Jeff’s phone to ring at 3am.

He groaned as he rolled over. There was really only one person whose phone call he was going to answer, and unfortunately for him, it was that person calling. For a second, just a split second, he thought about ignoring the call; but there was never even a small chance he’d actually do that.

Because it was you. And you were not only his best friend, but you never called him at 3 am, so it was possible that something was wrong, and he was fiercely protective of you.

Not at all in a “just friends” way, unless you asked; then it was totally in a friends way.

“Hmmhello,” he mumbled, the words barely able to get out of his throat as sleep still laced every part of his body. He hadn’t even fully opened his eyes.

“Jeffreeeyyy!” Your voice was loud and high-pitched and way, way too excited for this hour of the night, but it instantly lifted some of the worry off his heart. Clearly you were doing just fine. Which left the question, why were you calling him at this time? “I miss you!” you blurted out at the other end, and Jeff only now recognized the slur in your voice.

“You’re… drunk?” If only he was able to form coherent, full sentences, that would be great.

You giggled. “Maybe a teeeeeny tiny bit. Am I waking you up?”

It was 3 am, he’d had a game tonight and he was going to have one tomorrow - or today? What time was it again? - so obviously you were waking him up. But he knew if he told you that, you’d feel bad about it, and he wasn’t going to do that to you.

“Nope.”

“Liar.” You giggled again, but then you fell silent. The silence lasted so long Jeff was starting to wonder if you’d forgotten that you’d been on the phone with him, but then you spoke again. “I think I have a bit of a problem.”

That was enough to send adrenaline through his veins and suddenly he was sitting upright in his bed, completely awake now. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s… wrong, per se,” you lied through your teeth. Jeff had always been able to tell when you were lying, even through the phone. “I just think I might not be completely sure where I am.”

“You’re lost?” At 3 am, drunk, in the middle of Buffalo? Now he was really starting to get worried. “Where are your friends? The ones you went out with.”

“Lydia took a guy home. And Sarah… Well, we lost her a bit earlier in the evening. So I guess what I’m trying to say is, I don’t know.”

Technically, there was quite a simple solution to this problem. Jeff could tell you to open the Uber app on your phone and simply order one to your location. Or use Google Maps to find your way to the nearest night bus.

But really, that had never really been an option.

“Stay where you are,” he told you sternly. “I’m coming to get you. Don’t go wandering off, okay?”

“Okay,” you singsonged. “See you!” You hung up right away.

All Jeff could do was hurry to put on some sweats and a hoodie and run to his car, meanwhile opening your shared location on his phone. You had a habit of losing your phone so you’d switched on the ‘continually share location’ feature, linking your phone to his. He’d never thought he’d be this happy with that feature.

Luckily, you were only 10 minutes away from his apartment, and somehow he made it in 5. If there was a speeding ticket on his doormat next week, well, that would be worth it.

He spotted you soon enough. You were in front of a 24/7 corner store, sitting cross-legged on the pavement, a chocolate chip cookie in your hand. When he jumped out of the car, your face lit up like a Christmas tree.

“Jeffff Skinnerrrr!” you yelled, stretching your arms out to him. He couldn’t help but laugh as he carefully sat down next to you on the pavement, wrapping his arm around your shoulders to give you a quick sideways hug.

“Glad I found you.”

“I’m glad you found me too,” you hummed. “My hero.” You nestled into his side and dropped your head on his shoulder, and it was probably not appropriate for just friends to hold that position, but Jeff couldn’t bring himself to remove his arm from you. You fit perfectly like that, curled into his side, and he would be lying if he said he was in a hurry to get up.

That was until you shivered against him.

“You’re cold,” he stated, and removed his arm from you only so he could take off his hoodie.

“Now you’re gonna be cold,” you protested, tugging at the soft cotton of the t-shirt he was wearing underneath it, as if to demonstrate how thin it was, and he shot you a stern look. As always, you rolled your eyes, but a grateful smile appeared as you put on his hoodie and hugged your knees to your chest. “I would offer you some of my cookie,” you told him, “but I’m hungry.”

Jeff laughed. “Let’s go home, okay? I might have some ice cream in my fridge.”

He wasn’t technically supposed to have ice cream in his fridge - his nutritionist would definitely tell him off for that - but he knew you were a big desserts person, and it was the least he could do when you came over to cook dinner for him all the time.

“Oh, yes!” Excitement radiated off your face at his words and you jumped up. But the alcohol had gone into your legs and you started wobbling, losing your balance; Jeff only just managed to grab your hips to steady you. “Oops,” you whispered, and he smiled. You were so close to him he could smell the alcohol on your breathe and the smoke of the bar in your hair and normally he would hate it, on anyone else he would hate it, but it was you and it didn’t matter what you looked like or how you smelled, he always wanted to have you close.

“Come on,” he said gently, guiding you towards his car. “Ice cream, remember?” It was like trying to get a small, stubborn child into the car, but somehow, he managed, even going so far as to buckle you into your seatbelt, as you sat there giggling.

As soon as he started the car, you turned up the music. You sat there quietly humming the words of 'She’s Every Woman’ to yourself, your feet kicked up on the dashboard, your head leaning against the window, and Jeff couldn’t stop himself from looking over at you every few seconds.

You were his best friend, and he always felt happier when you were around, but there was something about your total inhibition in that moment and how wide you were smiling at nothing; it was perfect, everything about that moment, at least for Jeff.

Well, perfect, apart from the fact that he really wanted to reach over and lace his fingers through yours, or put a hand on your leg, or just touch you in any way, and he wasn’t allowed to do that.

“Stop the car.”

The words came out forceful and loudly, and it startled Jeff enough to step on the brakes.

“What, why?” he asked, but you simply bounced in your seat.

“Jeff, park the car!”

He wasn’t sure what was going on; you didn’t look like you were going to throw up, and you didn’t seem scared or upset, but you were stubborn enough sober that he knew drunk you wasn’t just going to let it go, so he obliged, turning the car into an empty Walmart parking lot.

Before he’d even put it in park, you’d turned up the volume of the radio as far as it could go and jumped out.

“That’s my favorite song!” you squealed, spinning around as you threw your arms up.

Your favorite song. You’d made him pull over because you wanted to dance. And the worst thing was, he couldn’t help but laugh, because it was such a you thing to do and he loved you. 

The song ended and a new one came on, a slow song this time. You turned around to see Jeff leaning against the hood of his car with his arms crossed, a smile on his face that was so bright it brought out the twinkle in his eyes. That had always been your favorite smile of his.

Sober you wouldn’t have dared. But drunk you had a few less insecurities, so you extended your hand to him.

“Dance with me?”

He stared at you for a few seconds that felt like they lasted forever, and just when you were starting to wonder if you’d finally pushed him too far, he shook his head with a giggle and then took your hand. He twirled you around under his arm, then pulled so you fell against his chest, and you laughed.

That laugh, however, died on your lips when your eyes met his. There was something hidden deep in those dark brown eyes and you weren’t sure what it was, couldn’t quite put your finger on it in this state, but it was enough to take your breath away as he slowly started swaying you back and forth.

The Walmart sign harshly illuminated your figures as you danced, your feet moving over the painted white lines. Not a word was spoken because there was no need to; it was just you in his arms, your eyes locked and his heartbeat against your chest.

Jeff knew this was a bad idea; you were drunk but he had no excuse and tomorrow you were gonna ask him what the hell he’d been thinking, but it was as if he had no control over his own actions as he spun you under his arm again.

The song ended, but he had no intention of stopping; in fact, he didn’t give a damn what song came on next, it could be Gangnam Style for all he cared about. This might be all he was ever going to get from you and that was okay. Tomorrow, if you wanted to, you could go back to being just friends. Tonight he had you and a long night and an empty parking lot, and he was going to make the most of whatever he had.

When you spun back to him, your hands tightened around his biceps as you leaned a little closer.

“Jeff?” you mumbled, and he raised an eyebrow. He waited for you to speak, watched your eyes flicker from his eyes to his lips, hoped and prayed that you weren’t going to tell him to get back in the car.

“Can I kiss you?”

His eyebrows must’ve shot up into his hairline, that’s how surprised he was to hear those words falling from your lips. He might’ve thought about kissing you at least twenty times in the past three minutes, but to realize that you had apparently had the same thoughts was almost too much for him.

Your smile faltered and he realized he’d taken too long to respond, and now you were doubting yourself and starting to pull away and no, this couldn’t be happening to him, he wasn’t going to let this moment pass, so he lurched forward and cradled your face in his hands. His lips were against yours before you could register what was happening, but once you did, you pressed up against his and deepened the kiss, curled your fingers into his hair and smiled against his lips.

Yellow lights flashed in the corner of your eyes and Jeff pulled away, still smiling.

“Security,” he told you, as if you hadn’t noticed, and a cheeky twinkle flashed in your eyes.

“Run?” you asked, and he nodded, barely visible but just enough for you to see.

“Run.”

You ran to the car as the security car pulled into the parking lot. Jeff stepped on the gas before you’d even fully closed the passenger door, and then you were zooming off. As expected, security didn’t bother to follow you.

As far as they were concerned it had just been two people in love, slow dancing in a parking lot.

[geekygoddesss]

Caught you

Summary: Rory’s life couldn’t be more boring, but who would have thought a simple discovery would make her life turn weirder and weirder. 

Words: 8.6k

A. Note: This is the first part of my series “Atypical”! you can find it here and on wattpad. I am so excited for it and I hope you love it.

Atypical Masterlist 

"Retreat day yay!" I exclaim very loudly as I walk up to the crowd of people that were starting to form in front of the yellow bus.

A few looks turn to my direction as I walk up to my dear classmates and join them all as they wait for this day to start. Retreat day was a highly anticipated day or so I've heard, it could be either incredibly fun or really boring, which from those two options, I was aiming for the second one. No good retreat could come out of an English class and not with all these assholes I call classmates.

A hand falls on my shoulder and squeezes it a bit. I turn to look at the teacher, who I recognize better as my uncle but decided for the collective good not to act like he is when being around the school. He is smiling down at me and looking as fresh as he does most days.

"Good, that is good, now say it like you mean it" He says raising his eyebrows at me, almost expecting for me to actually be excited.

A sarcastic laugh leaves my lips "Funny, I kinda mean it" I shrug.

"Do you?" he asks, surprisingly taking in my attitude better than other times.

"No" I shake my head as my smile drops and my lips are press together. There is literally a million other stuff that I'd rather do other than going on a school retreat.

"Ah, Ro, it's not that bad, I thought you loved museums, you did really great on the last essay, I thought this would excite you a little more" He said shaking his head a little, I know he was expecting me to like this whole thing and I did like the museum, a lot, it was just the timing, the people, the fact I have not slept in two days. I did not feel like going at all.

"I do, but really, today I just want to stay home" I say, shrugging as my uncle gives a sigh and squeezes my shoulder again, letting a silent 'it's okay' float between both of us.

"it's alright Mr. Harrington, she wouldn't be excited about something if she tried" said a voice from behind me and my nerves spike up. If that wasn't my archenemy I don't know who was, I would recognize that voice anywhere and at any time, it would make me feel as sick as it does right now.

I slowly turn around, making sure I was being dramatic enough as I took a good glance to the worst person I have ever met ever since I joined this high school, Betty the witch Brant, on all of her glory.

God damn, I hate her.

I shoot a big fake smile at her because it's what I do better when she is around, pretending it doesn't pain my guts that she's here talking to me. I wanna laugh at her comment, because it is just so funny that the one person that shows herself up in a screen with an ass face every morning comes up to me saying that, I guess that reminded me why I hate her so damn much.

"You are telling me I don't have excitement?" I say, pointing at her as I speak.

She crosses her arms above her chest giving me a tired look. "I am telling you that you should be grateful Mr. Harrington is even considering to take you on this trip seeing that you talk like you'd like to jump off the window anytime" She says with that bored and annoying voice that made me want to slap her so bad.

"That is not wrong, I would love to do that, no doubt I will if I have to listen to your voice all the way there" I laugh, mimicking her as I cross my arms over my chest too, shooting a look at her, a look that says 'Go the fuck out of my sight, I bite'.

"Maybe you should pay attention to the things I say, you could catch some of that, maybe it will give you some spirit to, you know..." She says eyeing me up at down, scanning me carefully to then mumble "Be normal"

I look down at myself. If she was really trying to make me feel bad about myself, she was really wasting her time, because if we need to start comparing, I look better than her and anyone who thought otherwise could go take a hike. I like me and like how I look, I love wearing leather jackets and boots, I love dark clothes and I love everything that resembled the past two, Betty Brant was not about to make me feel any less confident because of it.

"Oh gosh, now she is telling me to catch spirit from her, this is so funny" I exclaim as I take a step back and let a giggle come out of my lips, as I laugh at her with total sarcasm on my voice "Says the only girl who bring the real joy to this school every morning on the news, really, Betty, you inspire me, my tired face never looked better" I snap at her, making really handsy moves while a speak to give some drama to all this.

She does not really react to anything I am saying, her face remains still as I speak, totally pretending not to care, but I can see in her eyes, she cares what I am saying because there's that little something that flickers in her eyes when I finish talking, She hates me even more as the time passes, Good. if she had some kind of laser eyes I would be so dead right now, thank god she doesn't, but I don't care, if I had to die anytime soon, I wouldn't mind to die after telling Betty she's a bitch.

"at least I care for the school and do something that's actually helpful, People like me, so jokes on you Rory" she says, with that arrogant smile on her face that I hate so much "the level of joy I bring to this place is more than you ever will in your whole life"

"My fish had more spirit that you and it is dead" I say, heavily glaring at her while she threw a look at me, a look with pure fire in it.

"Girls, enough" said my Uncle stepping between us and making me give a step back.

Betty doesn't say anything else, I am pretty sure she has nothing in mind to get back to me, she is probably trying to think of something to make me feel bad but can't really get her finger on something that will get to me, so she just glares and turns around, walking straight to the bus along with her minions. Good, I hated to have her around.

"Rory, we talked about this, no fights, no arguing, no mean comments" I hear my uncle say in the background as I watch my archenemy walk away. I turn to look at him, he is really serious with what he's saying and I don't blame him, I know he doesn't like the fact that sometimes I tended to be like this to people, but really, it wasn't my fault Betty is such a bitch to me.

"I never do any of those" I say shrugging, trying to look as careless as I can  "She gets on my nerves" I excuse, like if that was going to really get me out a pep talk I've had already tons of times.

"I know but you know how kids are, sometimes things can be touchy so, self-control, got that?" he said sighing, now a bit frustrated at my attitude.

"Yeah Yeah" I nod and give him thumbs up  "Self-control, blah blah whatever"

he presses his lips together like if he is trying to think of something else to say to me but one of the other teachers call his name from afar, he knows there is no time for peep talk and I am really happy for it, I don't need it right now.

"I want you in the bus in 10 and you are sitting next to me, got it?" He says, palming my back as he walks past me "We don't need you arguing with anyone"

"As if I am planning on talking to someone" I scoff as I watch him walk away from me.

"light up, Rory, it'll be fun!" he says with a small smile, now disappearing into to the small crowd of people.

I contemplate the option of just getting into the bus all by myself since my only companion is now gone, I should do it, but I don't want any kind of rumors spreading about what the heck I was doing in the bus alone while everyone was waiting for the driver to come back, there was enough fake news about me around, I don't need another one. I walk to the stairs in front of the school and just take a seat there by myself, under the sun, waiting for the dumb driver to come back and lead us to another boring day of school.

I wait patiently, watching the people from my class hang around the bus, they laugh and talk to each other, some of them already excited for the trip and others really not looking forward to it at all, like myself, with a slight difference, at least they had a companion for the occasion, I didn't.

There was a lot of mixed opinions on why me - Rory, ex-cheerleader, ex-popular kid and last but not least, former mathematics leader- had no friends in school, most of these stories came from people who didn't really know me at all and at some point in life just decided they didn't like me and starting making stories, which a lot of people decided to believe and little by little I started to be more lonely every time, but if you asked me what the true facts of all of these made up stories are, I would tell you none of these are true. There is only one reason and the only truth is that I just like being alone, as simple as that. Is that so bad?.

"You're still here!" I hear a voice say in my direction, the only voice I cared about and felt some sort of relieving to hear  "I thought you were already getting lost in the art and all of that nonsense you love"

"Art isn't nonsense" I say to my only friend, as I roll my eyes to her in a total non-sarcastic way.

After all of those rumors that go around me in the school, I was lucky enough to have one person who decided not to believe all of that bullshit and stood by my side in every moment. My best friend and savior, Allison Ghannam, the only person I trust in this place.

"Right" She says at me with a very casual smile as she steps in front of me. "What happened? Why are you still here"

I cover my eyes from the sun to look up at her, she looked genuinely excited today, I don't know why but she does, Her cloth-covered head dressed in a color I have never seen before on her, a vivid, bright and happy color, and her eyes reflected something that told me, she clearly woke up on the right side of the bed this morning, she was in a good mood, I wasn't. Somehow I wished she could give me some of that right now.

"The driver went to the cafeteria to grab a bite or something, we will be gone soon" I say with a shrug as I move to my side and pat the spot beside me for her to sit on.

"Why the long face then, my friend?" She says, leaving her backpack down and sitting my side "Here, I brought you an apple pie" she says passing me the paper bag in her hand and my heart melts, this was too nice from her, I don't deserve it.

"Thanks" I say with a small smile as I take the bag and dig in for my apple pie "by the way, it's not a long face, it's just my face" I mock as I take the first bite. It is delicious.

"I can see that" she says rolling her eyes at me a little and turning to look at the people in front of the yellow bus, her face lighting up when she spots my uncle in between the crowd. It's crazy how good these two get along.

"Looking good Mr. Harrington!" she calls, waving at my uncle, who smiles at her and waves back "Red is really your color" she compliments and I mentally slap myself for not noticing, because he is suiting a brand new Jacket today and I was too busy worrying about other things that I forgot to mention that he indeed, looks good.

"Thanks, Ally, are you not coming with today? There's plenty of spots" He says loud enough for us to hear and pointing at the entrance of the bus behind him.

"No, thank you, sir, I actually have a test today and I really can't miss it" She shrugs a little and shakes her head. I hate the fact that she actually has an excuse to miss the retreat because I was really counting on the fact she would come over with us.

"Ah that's a shame, Rory could use a little company today" He says from afar, looking at me for a short second.

"I know, sir, but Duty calls, I can't miss it" She shrugs again in a small apology

He shakes his head, really not liking the fact that I am going to be alone on this trip but still facing it, because there was really nothing he could do about this "Well, good luck" he says, turning to the bus and walking back towards the group of teachers there.

Ally waves goodbye, giving a final smile to my uncle as I turn to look at her. Really, when you only have one friend in the whole school, having to go anywhere alone sucked really bad especially on this kind of situations, where I had no other options to be away with people I don't like for the entire day.

"It really pains me that you are leaving me alone on this" I say to her with a pout on my lips. I meant it, I hated to be alone on this, today.

"We weren't born together my friend" she nudges me and gives me a comforting smile.

"I know that but seriously, it's a forty minute trip, Ally, on a bus, no one likes me there-"

"You will be fine" she interrupts me, waving away my words and bad vibes "It's not that long, you can make it" she says in a cheery voice.

"Betty god damn Brant will be there" I whine and roll my head back in a clear whine, something that expressed my pain completely.

"It's just one person" She says shrugging and still keeping a smile on her face.

"That carries a bunch of parasites, including herself"

"Ro, you will be fine" she laughs and rounds her arms around my shoulders in support "its just a day" she comforts and I wish that those words had some kind on effect on me, because right now they really weren't, I was still as unmotivated as I was before.

"a long day" I whine leaning my head on her shoulder and closing my eyes, looking for some of her happy vibes to pass onto me but it is clearly not working and I feel just a bit desperate.

"Okay, you're grumpy, I get it, geez" She laughs and I feel her shake her head at me.

I mock her, moving my mouth and mimicking her last words with a small and high pitch voice that did not resemble hers at all, but I knew this annoyed her so I did it. Her hand pinches my arm at my mockery and I whine, instantly killing down my mood and making me quiet down.

"Is that a new Hijab?" I ask her, changing the topic, trying to establish a normal conversation.

"Yeah, my mom got it for me, you like it?" She says with a smile, touching a piece of the sky blue silky fabric with the tip of her fingers.

"No, the fabric feels incredibly hot and it's almost summer, you're insane" I say, not being totally serious and touching a little piece of the fabric too. I have always loved this shade of blue, even now when this fabric felt way too hot under this weather "but the color suit you terribly well, you look really pretty" I compliment her and she laughs, taking the compliment with a smile.

"Thanks" she says, totally proud of her color choice for the day "You can borrow it" she says nudging me a little.

"I'll consider it" I chuckle, sitting up straight now to look at her. "I'm gonna miss you" I whine and go to hug her.

She makes her short and sweet and hugs me for a second to then push me away and roll her eyes. "Stop crying" she chuckles at my attitude."You can tell me everything about how it went later, I'll pick up sushi tonight, so I expect you to be in my place at-"

"9" I say. it was Friday today and it was our night for hanging out and eat whatever, but it was no secret that Ally was a punctuality freak and I was always just a bit late to stuff, it was always better to make a deal where I could be on time and she wasn't going crazy at 'how late I was'.

"8:30, sharp" she points at me, getting up from her spot and picking her backpack off the floor.

"I'll do my best" I shrug. Not that I had something to do at that time, but really, being on time wasn't one of my talents.

the bell rings. Oh crap.

"You better" she laughs, rolling her eyes at me and starting to walk her way to the school and away from me. "Good luck on your trip, love you" she says to me, blowing a kiss as she picks up the pace to the insides of the school.

"Love you too I guess" I yell, waving back at her as she leaves  "Good luck on your test"

"I'll need it!" she yells back and before I can even notice, I am alone again.

Alone in this really boring day to come. What a luck I have.

By the time I got in that bus, I knew this was going to be the longest ride of my life.

Not only I got to sit beside my uncle, who was just stressing over every little thing around while trying to control the crowd of teenagers all trapped inside of the bus, but from my sit I could still hear Betty's voice, telling the most ridiculous, underwhelming and bland stories I've ever heard in my life, and that was what my trip was meant to be for the next half an hour or so. The ride was too long and painful. I mentally slapped myself various times for not remembering to bring a god damn pair of headphones along with me, to at least conceal the world around me as the trip went on, Instead I had to sit there and listen to not only my arch enemy's 'adventures' but to hear one of the many peep talks my uncle likes to give me from time to time but never on the right occasion, something about being nice and make friends, not only that but also adding a very detailed lesson on how to treat with others while in high school, like if an adult was allowed to give advice about it, I've said this before and I say it now, once you are past thirty, you are out of the young club and my uncle was definitely out and not qualified for this kind of things.

It was a long trip and I was hating every second of it, but I could thank the fact that it was a hint more bearable than I was imagining it because, on the contrary, I would have definitely thrown myself out of that window if that what it took to escape this small portion of hell.

Arriving at the museum was somehow... relieving, not only because finally, stepping out of the bus felt like walking out of a cage, but because this place felt like home to me, a second home that always welcomed me in a really nice way and I would never get tired of it. If only all of my companions knew how to properly appreciate this place, a shame that most of them barely knew what they were looking at, a temple of art, that's what this is. Deep down, I hoped for some of them to have the same appreciation for all of these as I have, or else, I would hate to feel like the trip my uncle planned for so long was just a waste of time.

After an hour of entering the museum, I didn't know if to classify it as a waste of time or if to pat my uncle on the back for doing such a good job with all this. It hasn't gone as bad as I anticipated. Some people showed real interest in the art, while others respectfully sat on the back of everything and decided to ignore all of the tour guide's explanations, which I honestly felt like it was a shame because most of this stories were too damn interesting and these pieces deserved all of the attention. On my side though, I felt bad for being one of those people who just did not want to be there, it felt so unlike me but i couldn't help it, after being at this place so many times I just knew all of it, not wanting to be a smartass, but I knew exactly what the tour guide said and what she was about to say, I've been here many times, I just know it and hearing it for what felt like the thousand times was not making me any sort of entertaining, It gets a little repetitive.

I just really needed a break.

That's why on the way to the second floor of the tour, one way or another I managed to slip out of the small crowd of high school students and just escape, not really caring if my uncle even saw me or not, I walked right out, I needed a minute alone.

I walk to the entrance of the museum, almost running my way past all the people until I reached the stairs on the front of the main doors and sat down on one of them, Lucky enough, I did not hear my name being called on my way out, so I knew I did a magnificent job sneaking out and now had about thirty minutes (or maybe twenty) until someone realized I wasn't there, but I didn't care, I knew I wouldn't get in trouble, I wasn't getting lost anyways.

I take a deep breath, a tension relieving my shoulders as I savor my moment alone, finally being able to properly breathe without about 50 people around me. This was my moment, I dig in my pocket, my mind tickling in excitement for what is to be my first treat of the day, I pull out the pack of mint cigarettes from my pocket and with a few swift moves I already knew by heart, I was taking the greatest advantage of my solitude while I could. The first drag felt like heaven, just like it should be every day.

I've been into this habit for about two years, maybe less, and the fact that I killed me every time I did it was not stopping me from doing it at all. Oddly, I enjoyed it, even when I knew how bad it was, It was my little guilty pleasure and I would enjoy it until I felt it was enough.

"oh la la, lady, you're missing the tour" I heard a voice say to me directly on my back, as I blew away my first cloud of poison, totally ruining my small moment of relaxation and making me curse under my breathe.

"Get lost Flash" I groan, placing the cigarette between my lips and leaving it there, taking along and deep breath in with it. Hopefully, it will relax me a little more now that my peace has been broken.

Flash, the most annoying guy of the school and my classmate since forever, sat beside me with a smile on his face, slightly violating my personal space and making mind fume at his unspoken annoyance, only the fact of having him around was annoying.

I glare heavily sending him hell with my eyes and telling him to go anywhere but here.

he laughs with sarcasm on his voice "You know this is the street right? I think I am allowed as a citizen to sit on a public-"

"You are and yes you can sit wherever, but not with me" I cut him off, rolling my eyes and moving away from him just a bit, trying to get back some of my personal space.

"C'mon Rory, that's a bit harsh isn't it?" he says shaking head and sliding closer again "Can I have one of those?" he whispers to me, I can sense that small desperation on his voice, that let me know that he meant this but still has never smoked before, which also meant, he wanted to blend in or just look cool in my eyes or.. someone's eyes I guess.

I blow smoke on his face, he coughs "I mean it, get lost" I say, bumping my shoulder with his, trying to get him to catch the hint and slide away.

"I'm trying to be friendly here, ok?" he says, still coughing a little and not moving an inch away "A little company never hurts" he says to me and smiles. I don't think anyone would ever like his company.

"Okay" I shrug, deciding to try and ignore him.

"I see you around all of the time and you wanna know what I see?" he tries to start up a conversation and getting all comfy in there.

"No?" I mumble, smoking a bit more, looking away at the streets of new york, just concentrating on anything but him.

"I see a loner" he says, nothing that I don't know already, I stay silent  "Why is that Rory?" he asks making his voice change as he speaks. His hand raises up and caresses my cheek softly "Such a pretty face doesn't deserve that"

"Gross" I say flinching back, throwing a look at him.

"See, I get how you feel" he keeps going, ignoring my gestures of disgust while speaking "Sometimes I feel like the world doesn't really get me, people talk, they say good things, bad things, but what I really need for me and what keeps me going is to have someone I can talk to"

my eyebrow raises "Are you trying to tell me you...?"

"I think we can be good friends, Rory" he says with a weird smile on his face "Something more if you let me" He tries to reach for my hand but I move it away, quickly.

"Last year you spread the rumor I was selling weed to all of your friends and I almost got spelled" I say with certain anger in my voice, a hint of mockery behind my words  "Not only that but accused me of "breaking" your ankle last spring and for that I got suspended from the cheerleading team" I say, his face losing that smile as I talk "Do you really think I would ever think of going somewhere with you?"

Everything I said was true, I had no interest for someone who just ruined one of the things I loved the most and on top of that, also liked to invent rumors of other people based on things that weren't true. Flash could go eat shit.

"Okay, first of all, I am completely sure it was you who stepped on my foot that day" he says in his own defense.

"And I am completely sure it was you who was taking pictures of my ass behind my back" I glance at him with a big frown.

"Rory that was- pff, that wasn't me, not anymore" he excuses, forcing a smile and trying to hug me from the side "I am a different person now"

"Are you? Are you really?" I say trying to shake him off my shoulders.

"Let me take you out" he says, again, totally ignoring my complains "Tomorrow after school, I'll take you to the red lobster, I've heard you love it, We can go bowling after that, take a walk around the city, get ice cream, It will be really great, we could even-"

As he keeps on speaking I look around for any kind of help I can have to send him off my sight, immediately, but not one familiar face is around, instead, I see a giant woman approaching my way, one that wore the security's uniform and was directly looking at my way. a flash of panic slashes in my head, If my uncle found out and told me, parents... shit.

"Oh crap" I say, moving away from Flash and hiding my hand with the cigarette to a spot that was somehow out of sight "Flash, shush" I tell him, looking away and acting natural.

"What? what? what?" he says in panic at my change of attitude "You don't like it, because I can totally change it, I get it, you might like to go a little edgier, Um, we could go hiking, at night, Fun right?"

"Shut up" I groan to him in a deep mumble.

My heart skips a beat when a hand taps my shoulder twice.

"Excuse me" says a deep woman's voice beside me. Flash turns around and looks up at her, but she doesn't acknowledge him, she's waiting for my response.

"Shit" I say under my breath as I turn around and putting my best casual smile on my face "Hello"

a fake smile appears on her face, letting me know that she was not in the mood today even when I haven't said a thing at all, yet. She points at the hidden hand beside my leg and with a fake kind smile she says "I'm gonna have to ask you to lose that, ma'am, we don't allow smoking in this facility"

I smile a bit more as I say "But I'm not in the facility" I say looking around "This is the street"

"Allow me to reiterate that" she hawks and says one more time "This area is museum property and smoking is forbidden, also, I can see you are clearly underage so unless you want me to call your guardians, I'm going to ask you to lose that"

I wish I had the words to get around it, but seeing that walking away from here was basically asking for trouble and that calling my parents would be literally the death of me, I smash my cigarette down on the concrete beneath my feet and step on it "Fine" I groan, tapping my foot on the cigarette. My addiction was still tickling inside of me, this was just like if someone had given me candy and then took it away from me, so mean.

"so um, Can you tell me where the smoking area is, uh.." I ask looking up to the woman and looking at the batch in her shirt "Karol" I say with a small smile on my lips.

"That would be the park" She says now standing up straight and walking away from me.

I curse under my breath, there is no park nearby.

Bitch, just... bitch.

I turn to my side, to find Flash still beside me and with raised eyebrows, looking at my pissed face and then smiling, as if that was going to make me feel better. Now I definitely did not want to deal with him.

"Honestly, get lost" I snap at him, Turning my back on him and waiting for him to react.

"So what about lunch?" he keeps on totally getting past my annoyance "We can grab lunch together-"

"Goodbye" I say in a very angry tone. Walking as far away from him and into the museum to get lost myself.

This day just kept getting better and better.

Flash could go to hell along with all of his friends and bad quality flirting, that's pretty much how I can sum up my feeling about this whole situation. Something about him really trying to get me to like him and also trying to get me past the fact he has done things that really make me despise him more and more all of the time, oh gosh, it makes me want to go back and kick him in the face, he was awful and stupid and an arrogant ass who really put himself in a pedestal that no one cared about. Flash can suck a dick.

My head is throbbing and my hands fidget as I walk around the museum, half hoping to run into my class but also hoping to not, because that only meant finding Flash again and him talking to me, I would very much like to avoid that at any costs.

I walk around the familiar hallways, from time to time stopping to see the art and the others to keep walking and pretend I am looking for my class and I got lost, which is obviously not true. However, on the inside, my head was killing me and I would give anything to just go out there and smoke. I know this is a sign, that I was getting too anxious for an addiction that was over me at a young age but it wasn't completely about the cigarette at all, it was more about the fact that I started something and never finished, that was getting on my nerves and driving me crazy and if smoking a cigarette would make that tone down, then fuck me, I need to smoke.

I take the elevator, the one that is usually only available for certain people that were obviously not high school students with bad habits, but luckily no one noticed me, I just get in and press a button up, waiting for the doors to close and get me where I need to go, quickly.

I could say I know this place like the palm of my hands, When the elevator opened all I had to do is lead myself through a couple of hallways that were nearly empty, which was understandable, it was still early for people to come to the museum, so it was easier for me to avoid any kind of thing that slowed me down, I just walked right in, slid past the security man -which is easier than it sounds like- that guarded the area I was aiming for and carefully, closed the door behind me and closed my eyes at the quietness and stillness of the place.

The gardens. My favorite place in the world.

This was the kind of place that only opened at a certain time of the day to the public, but it really didn't matter what time it was, it was always as beautiful as the minute before. My favorite place. I wish I could stay here for the rest of the morning and enjoy the day here instead of going back with the class but unfortunately, my time here was limited and I would use it for what it mattered.

I walk through the place making sure I stood close to the walls, knowing that this way I wouldn't get caught by the cameras around. I make my way through the top left corner of the gardens, where I knew there was a little passage usually only the janitors went in, but I knew there was a little place I could go in and be alone for a couple minutes.

Outside and last but not least, in peace.

I sit in one of the corners of the room, always away from the camera and wait, just to make sure my breathing was the only sound around. After a couple of minutes, I know I am alone, just like I wanted to, so I light up my cigarette and smoke, smoke until my head relaxes and my hands stop shaking. This is what true relaxation feels like.

I keep myself in there for about ten minutes, smoking, letting the tension leave my body until I feel like it's the right time and turn my cigarette off.

There's a sound, at my left, steps, a lot of them and the voices there do not sound like janitors. I hide behind a big gap on the wall, that I have always been sitting next to but did not consider getting in. I could have been paranoid, it was just noises, but this was a closed area and the janitors clearly already made their round judging by how clean this place was already. Something felt off, Made me nervous.

There is male voices whispering to each other, speaking quietly and really close to the wall, just like I did when I got inside, whoever these people were, they didn't want to get caught.  I catch a glimpse of one of their faces when they walk beside the gap of the wall, I freeze in place, staying as quietly as possible, they clearly don't see me since I was sitting down and the place carried a fair amount of darkness to keep me hiding. Good.

"How long?" one of them said to another. I could hear things moving here and there but couldn't put my finger on what the hell they were doing.

"10 minutes or so" says a deeper voice. Again those sounds, things moving and some strange sound of ripped out cables touching each other.

"Let's go over it, one more time" says the voice I heard first "third floor, a bomb goes off, everyone sleeps, we're invisible"

Bomb?. What bomb?. Oh crap.

"Bingo" that deep voice says with a chuckle.

My hands shake, but I manage to keep my breathing steady and invisible. These guys are criminals, "How did you manage to hide the thing?" asks the first voice.

"It's in the air bent, no one will see it" his friend says with some arrogance in his voice  "Plus, I figured it would make a better distribution of our new baby"

These fuckers planted a gas bomb on the air bent, that's why no one saw it, that's how everyone would sleep. They are insane, just, insane.

"Sweet" the guy laughs and I hear their hands clapping together "Hurry then, Let's get this started"

With that, I just hear steps, on and on and on, until they banish entirely and I am left alone again. I peek my head out carefully, to discover that I am indeed alone now, the criminals must have used some entrance around that I didn't know about and they are getting away with it just like so.

Holy crap.

My voice trembles "What the he-"

A smaller exploding sound ignites by my side, quite enough to not leave the room but still taking me by surprise and catching me totally off guard. Then there's another, and another one, the security cameras are blowing up. They are making themselves invisible.

I have to warn everyone.

I don't know how or when I got so fast. But the second I step out of the gardens I take the stairs all the way down to the third floor and as fast as my quick can carry me, it takes me about five full minutes to find my uncle and all my class in the middle of the hallway, which was a relief because this floor itself was really big, but also because we didn't have much time and I had to tell him about what I saw before something happened.

He smiles at the tour guide lady, as he pretends to be overly interested on her explanations and trying to get the others in the class as excited as he was, apparently he didn't even notice I was gone all of this time, but the moment he catches my worried eyes all he does is smile at me and signaling me to come over. He had no idea.

"Uncle- oh uh, Mr. harrington" I stutter, walking up to him directly and with a serious tone, I needed him to know this was serious  "Sir, I need to talk to you" I say when I know I had his attention.

"Not the moment, Rory"  He says with a weird laugh as he pulls me into a hug and makes me turn around to the tour guide as if he was trying to turn all my attention on her.  "I didn't see you around, I figured you would be behind us, are you having fun?" he asks sweetly and I get it, it's sweet that he cares about me this much, but right now, I need him to listen.

"I need to tell you something" I say, keeping my voice down in a mumble.

"You're bored" he says, instantly interpreting my words in a wrong way "I get that you've seen this a ton but not everyone has, don't cut the vibes off"

"It's important" I say, doing my best to keep it together and not snap at him even when he was being a total dick.

"Art is important!" he says in an overly excited voice as he tightens the hug "Enjoy it, Visualise it"

"Uncle-" I say pulling away from him.

"Sh sh sh, this is the best one" he shushes me. My hands shake, even more, we were running out of time and he isn't listening to me at all.

"You don't get it-" I snap and then there's yelling, people running and we are all lost and confused. I didn't get the chance to warn them.

No one really understands what is going on, but just like if someone had given them a command, everyone in my class starts crowding up, trying to look for some source of protection with each other. My uncle starts giving orders, telling everyone to calm down and remains where they were until security came but there was not a guard around the place, just us, just a bunch of people panicking and not knowing what the hell to do.

Power goes out and before everyone can start panicking again, there's smoke coming out from one of the air vents across the hall, I cover my mouth and nose instantly, scared of what that might be but others don't do the same as me and I can see from afar how some people start just passing out just like so. This is what they meant, they're putting everyone to sleep.

"Ladies and gentlemen, stay where you are and no one needs to get hurt today" Says one of the voices I heard when I was back at the gardens. There are two figures walking towards us, the people who were still awake, they are armed and have masks. Whatever they are planning to do, they are ready.

Some of the masked men start barking orders at us. I barely listen to any of them, but my feet move without me realizing I was even doing it, I just follow what they say and make my best to be invisible.

We are lined up against one of the walls, the fog is making its way towards us and sleeping all the people who breathe in the scent. I don't know if it was some kind of poison but I refused to let that thing come over here.

I barely realize what is really happening, but when I see the men walk towards the other end of the hallway where their first victims fell, I start scanning the room carefully. There had to be something else around, it's impossible that these guys only set one bomb on the whole floor when this portion of the building was so big. There had to be another one.

I see it.

I see its light, pink and bright, beeping through the entrance of the air bent and counting down god knows how many seconds. I had to do something about it, I can't let it put more people down.

There are more men participating in this robbery, I believe, because I don't only see one mask in the darkness of the room but plenty. They must have been undercover but even when they were not the majority they were still enough to control a crowd.

There are a yell and guns being shot, everyone panic and I hear girls crying, girls from my class, some people are praying and others just keeping their panic inside themselves. I guess I am one of them. I peek to see what's going on and I see what it is.

Another person is here, dressed in a onesie from head to toe and moving around the place with incredible ability. Some of the criminals are now down.

Oh shit.

Is that the Spider-man?.

I don't even have the time to fully have a reaction, because a door is being open and like animals endangered, everyone starts running to it and hurrying to get out, catching me off guard and sending me to the floor. I do my best to get up from the floor as everyone rushes out, I do a quick check-up, no one from my class is around and I can't see my uncle, I guess he had run with everyone else on their way out but in between the panic there was a lot of fighting in between and it was just one person against everything.

I had to help in some way.

When I say I know this place like the palm of my hand I mean it. I run towards a direction I know really well and grab one of the pieces I know that will help me on my little mission. That really large stick of wood in the exhibition, painted in vivid colors that no one really cared about, it's perfect for what I am about to do.

I move to the center of the room quickly, dragging one of the chairs that were sitting around the room as well. I am quick on what I do. I place the chair beneath the air bent and get on it, trying to reach the air vent with the stick but it's still too tall just one more inch...

"MOVE MOVE MOVE" a voice says behind me and before I can get back to what I was doing, someone knocks me down and I fell onto the floor.

My shoulder bangs hard on the wood covered floor and the pain rushes on my arm as soon as I hit the floor. I turn my head to the side. That masked guy is helping me up quickly and shooting one of his webs onto some guys face that was apparently coming to grab me from behind while I wasn't looking, and even when I should be grateful he's here to help, there is still shit I need to do and he is not letting me.

"What are you doing?!" I yell in frustration, facing the Spiderman directly.

"you're in the way m'ma" he says to me and grabs my shoulders, trying to get me to walk away to the entrance with the other people, but I refuse.

"no I wasn't! There's another bomb in the air vent!" I yell again and go back to the stacked chair I put in there.

"Please, get with the others, I'll take care of-" he begs, talking fast.

"Oh for god's sake" I yell in anger, as I turn around and go back to what I was doing.

I get on the chair and with the edge of the multi-million dollar stick, I knock the air bent off, jumping out of the way quickly as the ticking bomb falls to the floor.

There it is, in all it's glory. It hasn't gone off yet but it is still ticking and there is a big 1:45 on the screen and counting backward. We had to act quickly.

Just like if I had said it out loud, the spiderman starts shooting and shooting webs, covering the bomb entirely until Its almost completely covered and there aren't many gaps showing it's material. But when it goes off it is still enough to send us both flying on the floor, in the same direction, making me land on him.

His masked face looks at me and moves me away from his body and helping me up, seeing that the bad guys were still stealing the art from the place and he could not let them get away with it.

"Go with the others" He says as an order in clear words and my eyes widen. That voice, I know it, but from where?.

I try to speak but when he grabs my shoulders and tries to turn me around so I could walk out I see it. He has the biggest gap on his suit, cutting through the fabric around this torso and it was bleeding like hell.

"You're bleeding" I say trying to turn around to see the wound more closely, not wanting to be noisy but I felt the need to help. Now was not the moment though.

"Go!" He yells in frustration, pushing me out of the way and running towards the criminals, that pointed their guns at him.

I ran away at the sight of guns, run and run until I don't hear them anymore and before I can realize, I am on the outsides of the museum and my uncle is crashing me into his arms, praying to god, thinking that I was in okay, but little did he know. I wasn't. My head was messed up.

In my head, I was just processing what just went down. The bombs, the shooting, that people that were knocked out, I could only hope they were okay and inside of me, my conscious felt half serene because I helped and I was grateful I had the chance to do something so things couldn't get worse.

But there was still something in my conscience that bothered me and it was that guy, he was hurt, seriously hurt by god knows what and he was there, bleeding himself out and fighting bad guys, I want to help, I wish to help just like he does with a lot of other people.

I should be able to help, but how?.

However, I know that voice, I have known that voice for a long time and I could be wrong but I am almost entirely sure It has been around me for a long while, but I can't put my finger on it, I can't get my head to recognize it even when I know, I've heard it, plenty of times.

and inside of me, I can only think.

Who is the Spiderman?

[survivormontenegro]

Episode 3: "This is a lying game. You have to be good at lying." - Michael

It’s sad bitch hours with your boy skinny penis!!!!!!!! Uhm I’m not in a good position I don’t think KSKSKSKSKSKSK Alex told me he, Caeleb, Evan, Jules, and JJ all have a 5 person alliance possibly forming,,, and if you do the math that’s 3/4 of the brigade,,,,, yk,, the one with Jules, JJ, Alex and some irrelevant bitch named ME!!!! Alex is reassuring me saying it’s all for the brigade, but I’m waiting for Jules or JJ to say something about it, or else I’m not gonna feel so good yk??? Like if it’s for the brigade then you should feel comfortable w telling me about it,, like basically all this is telling me is that I’m the most expendable member of the alliance but I die gress,,,,,, Speaking of the brigade idk how I feel about the brigade strategy ? I just feel like there are a lot of moving parts to it, and it lowkey feels like a selfish excuse to have more allies for yourself JSJDJSJSJJSSKS like,,, idk, plus I feel like there are more chances for flipping and I’m like blehhhhh. It’s dumb. Everything’s dumb. I’m dumb. I flopped in the bridge. I’m soooo dumb. Pls destroy me. I’m probs fonna throw this immunity to JJ bc WHILE I LOVE alex’s joking remark about blindsiding him at 18th, I feel like if I try and set it up for a JJ win then it’ll seem like he’s good w everyone and put a target on his back,,, idk!!! Idk. I just want some form of power. I’m hungry. Gimme gimme.

Omg me and Ali are SOOO close to the idol....!!!! unless its already been taken ugh but I was like almost there today but fell at 90 so he will prob get it which is cool better than anyone else !! altho would still be nice to have it hehe . tho knowing my idol history of wasting and being blindsided with it.. .maybe its for the best not for me to have it LOL

So its kinda awk last round I voted Noah I think most people did so now idek what to say to him ahhh . and now its a double tribal soo hopefully its just a repeat but. after this its prob a swap which is scary but I hope I atleast end up with ali or mitch or even jared, and from the other side my queen willow

omg Reuben "sandwich" Studdard, american idol season two WINNER helped me get that IDOL

We shockingly won immunity wow!! That at least saved us from going to tribal and kinda spared Noah if everyone was telling the truth to me before the results.

Then here comes double tribal and first of, it’s good we won immunity on the previous round because the double tribal is screaming a swap next and all tribes will probs be equal in og tribe member numbers. Secondly, if everyone is still in the same page then the target is still Noah.

Honestly tho, I kinda want to target Michael just cuz he threw my name out to Julia. But it’s difficult to go against the consensus even more so because of this twist.

Right now, I’m in an alliance with Jason and Julia which I’m gonna be loyal to. I’ve also got this thing going with Jared where we share information and I think he has something going with Michael? I’m also working my relationship with Ali and Benj, so I’m gonna keep them in my back pocket for now. I’m also a bit close with Mitch. That only leaves Michael and Noah as the people I haven’t really connected with. I mean did talk with Michael about academic and stuff but it’s still hard talking to him hahahaha. Talking to Noah is fine but like from what I’m getting he is the next to go, mainly because Jared and Michael were I think the ones who threw his name out among the others including to me, so it’s hard to become invested to talking to him :((

I’m trying to cover all my bases here, and not be a so oblivious on what’s happening in my tribe. Nicole G is my spirit animal!

me: I should at least try and keep this idol a secret

benj:

benj:

Me: OKAY I FOUND THE IDOL WOO

okay so.... its paranoia o'clock and julia is who the clock struck on.

"i think a couple others might put me as 1"

this is what she said when i told her i was putting her top of my list. this is freaking me out, because a) this means others think she is their top ally b) its just.... what? like... julia is obviously connected and this freaks me out.

in other news, my list for the challenge is probs gonna be this: julia > jared > ian > benj > mitch > jason > michael > noah

julia because she is my ally, jared/benj in 2nd and 4th because that is our plan, ian high because king, mitch/jason middle because kings, and then michael and noah because they are my biggest worries.

i think some shenanigans could happen with this challenge and a twist or something, i don't really know what to think. i don't think i want to win, i feel like i've already got a lot of attention from doing good in challenges, if i win this one thats going to get me even more unwanted attention.

but ya, so otherwise... benj is such a king, he is playing the kind of game (at least I think) that i always want to... just super social and nice, and like lowkey strategic. i think earlier on, i made jason my winner pick, i think he might be a lil' bit too inactive, i think i'm feeling ian or benj as a winner pick now. its defo not gonna be me, have you ever SEEN me play, i'm a whole mess.

okay so... nancy drew hat is on and i'm onto the biggest threat on our tribe. its Ian.

here is the evidence, it comes from two people who freak me out on this tribe. julia and jared.

STAGE 1: Jared sending his list (a choice...?)

This is apparently Jared's list. 1. Ian 2. Ben 3. Jason 4. Ali 5. Michael 6. Julia 7. Mitch 8. Noah

Couple of interesting things here. Jason is high, Ian is VERY high and Julia is low. Already my radar is ping-ping-pinging about Ian being high, because he has been on my radar before, he hasn't got far in games before by fluke, he is smart. Also, I've been feeling for a while (and have been talking to Benj about this), that Jared has other allies, other people he is working with (he is evidently playing multiple sides, but he is obvious so i'm not as fussed). Anyway, so Jared I've felt has been playing other angles, and now Ian is his top choice!

I think I did a smart today too. My 2nd/4th strategy. What it was, was for me/Benj/Jared to put each other 2nd and 4th on our lists, to not sabotage each others' chances of winning, but also not give away our alliance. It had two additional purposes, to allow me to put someone else 1st to build trust, and to see who they put first. Jared put Ian. which... is very interesting. very very interesting. This ties into theory #2

STAGE 2: Julia says Mitch is targeting her....

"Hello!!" - from Ian, at 00:41 "ummm mitch is throwing my name out" - from Julia, at 00:47

okay so this solidifies to me that Ian is defo playing SO smart. When I told Julia she was top of my list, she was.. notably quiet about where I am on hers. And like... i dont care jkalsfda, i don't want to win. But it means, in the very least someone else is first. So with that said, the question is a) who is top b) who told her about mitch. Now I had no idea Mitch was targetting Julia, I think its a dumb, dumb move, since his name has already been thrown out there versus Noah, so he needs to... play a whole lot smarter. But... someone obviously told Julia, and I know it wasn't me, it wasn't Benj (he likes Mitch). I am just now realising as I type this that Jared had Julia about Mitch on his list, so he couldve told her, but I am thinking it was Ian.

I was talking to Julia before her saying Mitch was targeting her. Its only when Ian came online that she knows this? I think Ian is working with everyone, playing it super super smart. I think he is playing all sides, but less blatantly than Jared.

STAGE 3: What the frick-a-frack do I do about this?

Okay so.... an important preface is that... I could be totally, totally misreading the situation. But I have felt since the start that Ian is a better player than he was letting on. But what do I do about it?  Well for starters, I need to look at numbers I know I have. Benj/Jared/Mitch I think are all in my corner, Michael/Jason I could hopefully swing, and Julia is tight with me, Noah.... Noah is tough because he trusts me but also... we like all voted him out last round so we will see what to do about that pickle. So I don't think Ian can make a move on me if he wanted to, and I can't make a move on him.

so we wait. I'm keeping Ian 3rd on my list, because I really really want to keep an eye on him, and wanna get in close. keep your friends close (benj/julia) and your enemies closer (ian). I love Ian, he is a real king, but I'm onto his winner shenanigans, and is he going to march to the end unopposed? Well...

okay hey freaks. my tribe? decided to all snort from the collective crack pile in the middle and lose their HEADS and its unacceptable. UNACCEPTABLE.

first off, my cracked tin foil ian conspiracy? was CORRECT. benj also trusts ian! ian is playing EVERYONE, I'm on to him and I hope this challenge exposes him! I am ONTO YOU IAN! YOUR TRICKS HAVE BEEN OBSERVED.

in other news? budva tribe has lost their ENTIRE minds, and if we go to a double tribal with durmitor? we are going to fracture faster than you can say '18' (coincidentally also the placement i'm getting).

Here is the break down. Noah told Julia that Mitch threw her under the bus, and Noah wants to work with me & Julia. WHICH CRAP, I do not wanna work with Noah because I already voted for him. And in the grand scheme of things, having voted them out is an exceptionally poor foundation for an alliance.

If Mitch seriously threw out Julia's name to Noah, he is exceptionally foolish. WHY. he has already almost been the vote twice, he needs to just NOT AJKLDFASF. i just.... my tribe is driving me absolutely insane. Jared actually is like... back on this planet and being less scary, but Michael is off recharging in his robo-station and GONE, mitch/noah are losing their minds, Julia is leading charges and Ian is playing TOO WELL.

honeslee if its a combined tribal, budva is going to literally explode. explode.

i want to work with noah if he wants to work with me.... but i literally voted for him, how do I get back from that JKLASD. I also want to work with Mitch but he NEEDS to control his mouth, its causing problems. i just want everyone out except benj/jared/julia/jason, the other 4 can go BYEBYE.

So apparently Mitch leaked the vote to Noah and was attempting  to vote out Julia. So I talked to Ali, benj, Ian, and Noah about it and we are all voting Mitch. Depending on what happens at immunity 

(Continued) Mich and Michael were gunning for me??! RED ALERTT RED ALERT WEEEEE WOOOOOO WEEE WOOOOOOOO. Luckly I gathered the forces and we had the majority to vote Mitch. I might have managed to convince Michael to vote Mitch (maybe not? We will see tomorrow) but he doesn't trust me. Womp womp. I mean Michael was not in my immediate line of threats so I don't know why he wouldn't trust me. I guess we don't talk much but it seems like I always have to talk him, it's not reciprocal. 

Okay so it has honestly been a roller coaster.

Following Madeleine's vote I thought that I was going to be in a FABULOUS position, but that was not the case.

Most of the tribe went fucking silent on me. That round brought me to a whole new level of frustration that I can't even DESCRIBE. I was freaking out because I genuinely felt like I was just getting iced out and was going to be eliminated.

As soon as that round from Hell was over, I felt the need to act quickly and harshly to try to improve my position in the game. I took a major gamble by creating 100% false rumor (there wasn't even the slightest bit of truth to it), and took it to Julia. I told her that Mitch had been talking about targeting her to me. Now this was a huge risk because she could've sniffed me out right away, but luckily for me she's kind of nutty and bought it.

With that lie I essentially destroyed whatever alliance Julia and Mitch had. In the process I managed to A) Make Julia feel like she can really trust me to have her back, and B) Increased Mitch's already sizable target to decrease the odds of people coming after me.

I further pushed Mitch's game down the drain by stroking Jared's paranoia that Mitch is plotting against him, but in this case I was actually telling the truth because the truth could be used to my benefit.

So I really have two major goals that I would like to complete within the next 24 hours; 1) Solidify a F3 alliance with Julia & Ali. 2) Send Mitch home.

I suspect that we're going to see a tribe swap after this vote, but just in case we don't swap that soon, I'm already planting VERY subtle, small seeds in people's heads that Matthew should be the next one to go following Mitch.

Overall, the twists being thrown at us early on this season have really forced me to take a much more aggressive, offensive battle strategy. I've essentially found myself in a position where the best way for me to ensure my own survival is to jump on any opportunity to turn my tribemates against eachother.

My hope is that if there IS a tribe swap, it'll benefit me and put me in a more comfortable position where I can lower my profile a bit and stay more under the radar. Obviously it's great to make moves and have some control in the game, but I also know from experience that playing too aggressively for too long is the best way to set myself up to crash and burn.

Literally people are telling me they’re putting me first on their list ahsjdjsjs ok folks assuming y’all aren’t lying immunity could work!!

The scoop that just came in this morning is apparently Mitch is being one hot mess? Julia told us that Mitch threw her name as a target and then Jared told me Mitch leaked to Noah that he was getting wacked had we lose the puzzles challenge. Naturally this made things quite difficult because Noah was obviously the easy vote but here comes Mitch making a mess out of things.

This morning made me realize that Jared is dangerous. He is calling the shots and I won’t be surprised if he actually faked all this information about Mitch being a mess because he did wanted to go after Mitch the previous round before we all decided with Noah. My alliance with Jason and Julia better keep an eye on him. As much as dangerous Jared is, he still trusts me with information so I ain’t getting rid of him yet, contrary to what our friendly neighbourhood robot/Michael is concocting. Jason told us that Michael wants to make a move against Jared now, and uh no I don’t take orders from a robot and he would just replace Jared with himself as the so called king pin of Budva. I’m gonna relay this info of Michael targeting Jared on the wraps until the time to take out Michael presents itself because bringing my name up will get ur ass burnt!! Assuming there ain’t a swap incoming which the likelihood of a swap occurring is VERY.

Julia told me and Jason she’s already in the 60’s on the bridge and me and Jason are here in the 20’s like ok.

I’m also becoming very close with Ali and Benj. right they’re my back up if we do swap and I’m separated from Julia and Jason.

So in summary of this little rant, the targets are Mitch and Noah. Mitch is the more likely to being the one getting whacked and although I do like the guy, him being messy and with the potential of going rogue is a big liability. Although Noah can also go rouge but at least he ain’t messy!!

okay so confession time, since its looking like the vote is kind of finalising.

its looking like mitch, and he is such a king, but he also like... kind of did this to himself? i can kind of understand why he did, like he was the Plan B for both of our previous tribals (even though he was never in jeopardy), but like... particularly since i think its kind of obvious we are swapping after this double tribal, he only needed to ride out one more tribal.

but he just did so so much, like first he threw Julia under the bus to Noah and then with Michael started targeting Jared. Like that just isn't smart, like going to the person who was the other potential vote, to throw people under the bus. Noah I'm sure wants to elevate his own standing, and Mitch literally gave him the ammunition to do so?

also like Jared and Julia are maybe two of the louder personalities on our tribe? Like if he wants an easy target to divert attention off himself, Julia apparently isn't great socially, but also like.. its obvious she was going to be able to rally support for herself, as is Jared?!? Like I get Jared is a threat, he is doing a lot and very clearly at that, but a big move like this while maybe justifiable at merge, is just way too early.

so yeah, at the moment I think Mitch will go 7-2, because I could see at least one of Benj or Michael throwing him a pity vote. I really wanted to work with Mitch, but he would just do... too much, like people were mad at him for his weird feud with Madeline, and like... he just needed to take it easy.

for the swap, i'd like to swap onto a tribe with jules, because LEGEND LOVE THEM. i really hope the swap situation is not 4vs4, i want to build trust with the other tribe going into merge. I really hope Thomas doesn't make merge, he makes me SOOOOO nervous.

also idk if i ever confessed about this, but rip david robb. to reuse an emathia joke (a season he will not remember), david robb-ed.

I’m voting for Willow, and I feel awful because she’s a really sweet girl. But the brigade has to stick to its guns. Willow is the only person excluded from our brigade plan, and especially with a supposed tribe swap coming soon, we need to keep the eight of us as tight as we can be.

Sorry Willow!

so this round has been an absolute cluster fuck and im really emotionally drained because of it. mitch first of all fuck you, you stupid lying ass bitch. you wanted to throw my name under the fucking bus are you fucking kidding me you idiot??? I HAVE BETTER SOCIAL CONNECTIONS RN. I don't even want the damn thought of me leaving rn as an option like are you serious. fuck you!!!! second of all jared is now a target and i'm literally so stressed I cant think straight. but my goal to get mitch out is hopefully gonna work.

As far as the rest of the game goes, I’m kinda scared and kinda excited by the prospect of being so beloved by everyone in the game. I was talking with Alex, and apparently everyone that he’s talked to in this game has mentioned how much they love me when asked about how they feel about the tribe. While it’s a big change from being voted out 9-1 for being “Hostile and unapproachable”, it’s scary. What if that makes me a big threat? I hope not. My fate in this game most likely rests on loyalty, which isn’t a great standpoint to have in a game like survivor.

I’m mitch saying he hasn’t heard anything and Then suddenly saying he’s hearing Jared

Boi what should have been an easy vote for Noah has now become a mess of a vote and your probably gonna be the one hit in the crossfire. Assuming the people who I’ve talked to are being truthful.

Meanwhile Julia, Jason and I have more or less come to a consensus to end Mitch with Julia probably earning Michael’s supposed allegiance since I think Michael is pissed that Mitch had become messy so the robot is now prolly voting mitch and Michael is always talking with Julia?? Idk mess

On a different note, I’m really liking Ali. He’s got a great insight on the status of the game rn and he HAS A DOG!!

Wow at me doing more the 2 confessionals

Shit literally hits the fan when you’re eating breakfast yeah?

Julia crossed the idol bridge only to discover the idol has been found!! Kudos to whoever did that, I only got to 25. Right now everyone is panicking, mitch could have the idol idk Michael could have idol idk

Right now the plan needs to split the vote between Michael and Mitch. I assume none of them won immunity but the idol is still in question. The potential people to be caught in this mess of crossfire will be either mitch, Michael or Jared. It could also be me or it could also be anyone!! Who knows let’s see if I live to tell the tale!!

this vote is a mess, and... i am the cause of it KJLSADFAF.

so julia has learnt that the idol has been found, she told jared, who told... literally everyone JKNLASDFASF. but i have the idol, but people are kind of assuming either Michael or Mitch does which... works for me KLSDAF.

But of course people (especially Jared) want to split the votes. Which YIKES, the Budva tribe is dead six feet under after this for sure EEEK. Like literally... we as a tribe voted Noah OUT, and he is gonna be so comfortable after this vote he DID THAT WHAT A KING.

but yes I think Budva tribe is not going to be able to stick together long term. Like after this vote, Michael and Jared are gonna be out for blood. Noah can sense sharks in the water after last tribal. I'm also now really hoping for a swap, people want Jared out, and if we don't swap, Jared has DIRT on me and benj which could be really problematic aklsdfa.

yeah i think tonight the plan is to split the votes between michael and mitch to save jared? who people literally want OUT this is such, SUCH a mess. we are about to swap and everything is literally going to explode oh god.

in other news, i still have the idol so woo! I APOLOGISE TO MY ENTIRE TRIBE FOR WHEN YOU READ THIS, YOU WILL ALL HATE ME FOR KEEPING THIS A SECRET IM SO SO SO SORRY.

omg imagine if noah made up all that stuff mitch apparently told him and he caused all this chaos (well except for the idol, that was defo me KALSDFSA). his MIND, noah is flexing that big brain on us lesser mortals.

my game is over. jared is going and i want to vote him, but also he will just expose our alliance and idk what we do about that EEEEEEEK.

I swear this is my fucking last confessional for this round. So jared’s messy ass finally caught up to him and now me and my golden girls are flipping the script! If everything goes accordingly jared’s going?? And Noah is the only left out of the loop probs

okay i'm going to confess as much as i can, as quick as i can. the vote is now jared and benj & i have a really cracked scheme to make sure he doesn't expose us. noah is being left out of the vote. benj is voting mitch too, so it looks like jared has two votes alongside him and thus he doesn't expose me and benj?

ITS CRACKED AND A MESS. also jared going and the mess is good, it made me look like a REAL follower which is good news i think.. i was worried about looking threatening.

honeslee cut to jared winning immunity and this mess being... even messier KASLFSADF like honestly i'm just. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

also michael truly terrifies me. i'm freaking out about the vote, and he pops in being like 'hear jason out'. LIKE SIRI I KNOW YOU WANT YOUR CHUM MITCH TO STAY, but its VERY unhelpful to just pop in and make it REALLY clear i'm on the outs K;JLSDFA.

i just am so tired. Julia/Benj/Ian are the only ones I trust, Jason too kinda but he defo runs the show. Michael is just confusing and Mitch/Noah are both not gonna trust me after this vote. I'm so getting screwed over in this swap KLASDFSAF I HATEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

[shadowsof-thenight]

Had a voice: Chapter eleven

Story summary: For two years you had let him dictate your every move. Dictate your time, your friends, your work. Everything, literally.  And for the life of you, you could not understand why you’d done so.

Now, here you were. In a beautiful but still strange city that had never become your own. And you were all alone. It was time to take back your life.

Ship: BuckyXreader

Words: 1795

Warnings: none for this chapter.

A/N: Again I struggled a little with this chapter. I have decided to change the entire story haha. All the thing I had planned suddenly didn’t seem right anymore. The end will be the same, but how I get there had undergone some change. Anyway, hope you like this installment.

***

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“I hear subtlety isn't your strong suit” Wanda chuckled as she dropped down on her bed. You sat at her desk, your head in your hands and groaning. It had been three days since the dinner. After the first two days without a comment from either Wanda or Natasha, you had hoped Natasha had decided to ignore it. You should have known better.

“Thanks Nat” you muttered and the beautiful redhead spy laughed loudly. She wasn't sorry for pointing out the obvious. Wanda eyed at you with great sympathy in her features as she turned her head in your direction from her sprawled out position on the bed.

Though Wanda had been dismissed from the hospital wing, she had not yet fully recovered. She grew tired rather quick and would need to lay down a few times a day, such as she did now at eleven in the morning. Those moments of rest gave her the opportunity to have talks like these with you. Not something you particularly enjoyed, no matter how happy you were to see her up and about. When she had asked you to walk with her, a few minutes earlier, you had not thought anything of it. Simply thought she wanted to chitchat before she fell asleep.

“So...when did that happen?” Wanda wanted to know, her face a little contorted as she repressed a yawn.  

“I...I don't know,” you stumbled over the words as you tried to think back, when did it start? You really couldn't tell. Was it when he took your hand in his? Or did it happen before that? Had his act of rescuing prompted these feelings? Or were they more genuine? You really didn't know.

“I mean, he's been so nice and when I went to thank him, he looked at me and my stomach flipped” you muttered, still unsure, “I don't even know if it's real” you added as Natasha just raised an eyebrow.

“Why wouldn't it be real?” Natasha wondered, “you would not be the first to fall for those blue eyes. I highly doubt you'll be the last”

“No it's not him.” you quickly replied. If it wasn't real it was on you, “Wait, do you like his blue eyes?”

Again Natasha laughed loudly as she sat down on the edge of the bed Wanda lay on. She explained that she was not in fact drowning in those ocean blue irises. She's just been around too many women that felt themselves getting lost in them. Those eyes have a pull that has made many a woman lose their directive. Bucky just never really noticed. He was a little oblivious. He didn't think anyone could still fall for him, not after all he had been through. A thought that wasn't too bright. If anything, you wanted him to be happy. To see how good a man he was. And that he was worthy of love.

“Will you tell him?” Wanda wanted to know, unable to repress the next yawn.

“Are you kidding me?” you exclaimed, the laugh that left your lips filled with self-contempt.

“Fine just swoon in silence if you wish” Natasha said with a shrug and stood up, holding out her hand to you. Time to let Wanda get some much needed rest. Wanda waved and rubbed her eyes as she shifted slightly to get more comfortable.

Linking arms with Natasha you walked through the door and just as you were about to close it completely, Wanda squealed. Both og you quickly looked back to see an apologetic Vision standing next to her bed. Someday he would learn not to barge in unannounced. Today was not that day.

Both Natasha and you chuckled before you walked away.

“So tell me, why would it not be real?” Natasha said as you were out of ear shot of Vision.

“What if I’m just feeling this because he was there for me when I had my panic attack” with a timid voice and your eyes downcast you answered her.

“Hmm” Natasha pondered it and shrugged, “ I guess you'll have to figure that out”

“Yes I do” you agreed solemnly. It would not be fair to him if you jumped to conclusions. Nor to you. And Natasha would not let you forget it, obviously.

***

And that was what you were doing now or plotting to do, a week later as you sat in the kitchen, enjoying a nice warm cup of tea, that Natasha'd had at the ready for you. While she made herself an after work-out breakfast, you tried to warm yourself up. Unlike you, she had been up at six to train. It was ten in the morning now and while she just came back up from the gym, you had just strolled into the compound.

The only work out you'd had was the walk from your hostel to the bus stop and from the bus stop outside of the compound to the kitchen inside. A good 15 minutes in total. Ten of which had been in the pouring rain, mind you. And you were dripping all over the seat you were on.

Bucky walked into the kitchen as well and threw a towel your way with a smile.

“I saw you running” he explained, pointing to the large window that overlooked the drive way, amusement clear in his tone, “Next time just ask someone to pick you up” he added.

“Oh, well, a little rain never killed someone” you quickly muttered with a smile and a shrug.

“Call me next time” he pressed, before turning around and opening the refrigerator. He grabbed a bottle of water, nodded to Natasha and walked out again. Leaving you in silence.

“Guess you have to call him next time” Natasha said smirking and you rolled your eyes as you began drying your hair with the towel he gave you. It was still warm and you sighed content.

“It would be the perfect opportunity to see if it's real,” she said, choosing her words carefully. She glanced around as she spoke, making sure no one would overhear. Something you were grateful for. She might've liked teasing you a little, she understood that it was important to figure out your feelings for yourself, before anyone else would know. She smiled at you knowingly. She was right after all.

***

You stood by the door, groaning as you saw the rain pelting down. You really needed to start walking now if you want to make it to the bus stop in time, but it had taken so long to warm up that morning. You weren't really ready to be soaked once more. Pulling the hood of your coat over your head, you wrapped your arms around you and stepped out the sliding doors. It was unlikely the rain would be letting up any time soon.

Taking another deep breath, you counted to three before stepping out from under the roof. One, two... “Wait!” Bucky's voice called out from behind you and you frowned as you looked back. Had you forgotten something? He jogged closer and stopped before you with a smile.

“I thought I told you to call me” he said, his eyebrows raised in question.

“Yes, but” struggling to find a good excuse, you stared at the floor. The only reason you had not taken him up on his offer, was because you were a chicken. As much as you wanted to figure out your feelings, you also didn't want too. What if you found that it was all very much real? Then there would be a whole array of new questions to answer. Questions such as; would he feel the same?  And were you ready for something new?

“But?” Buck pulled you back from your contemplations.

“I didn't want to bother you” you simply shrugged, knowing it was a weak excuse.

“No bother” he said and placed his hand on the small of your back, stirring you towards the underground garage. He stopped in front of a black pick up truck and opened the door on the passengers side for you, motioning for you to get in. He stood there patiently as you did, closing the door behind you once you were settled. You sighed as you buckled yourself in, while he walked around the car and got in on the other side. Somehow you knew Natasha had a hand in this.

“63rd street right?” he said and you just nodded, grabbing your phone, only to find Natasha had sent you a winking smiley. She was insufferable, even though you could not help but smile. She certainly meant well.

The first few minutes was spend in silence as Bucky navigated the car over the long drive way, before turning onto the semi busy road that would lead into the the city centre. You weren't sure how what to say to him. Conversations had been easy, before the butterflies, but now everything seemed wrong. You opened your mouth several times to speak, but would quickly close it again as the words left you.

“Are you coming back tomorrow?” Bucky finally broke the silence, his eyes were trained on the road, which you were grateful for. That way he would not see the internal struggle that was most likely visible on your face.

“Yeah, I think so” this was one answer you didn't need to think off too much. You would be back. There wasn't much else for you to do, while you waited to hear back form the many letters you had sent to companies the past few days. You didn't want to be alone while you waited, it would drive you crazy. Besides, you wanted to be with Wanda as she recovered.

He promised to pick you after his morning workout the next day, not accepting a no. you smiled at him and resigned your protests. You didn't mind the ride. The hour long bus ride wasn't exactly something you looked forward too. And Bucky was good company. Even if you were being awkward and weird.

“Do you still work at the theatre?” Bucky asked a little while later as the silence had once again spread between the two of you. By now he must have noticed that something was different. After all, conversation had flowed so easily before.

“No, I...They...they had to let me go” you muttered. Slightly ashamed to admit it. You hadn't even told Wanda.

“Their loss, certainly” Bucky took your hand in his and squeezed it gently, reassuringly.

“Yeah, sure” you chuckled, not necessarily agreeing with him.

Chapter 12

Tags: @gracelynn318