#and said something about me being fearless and living the dream

[thistransient]

I left Taipei last Thursday, and have not been on a trip longer than 6 days in more than two years. Today I had grand ambitious to go back to the town centre and make more tour inquiries (because I was due to check out of the guesthouse tomorrow), and perhaps go for a walk to a distant stupa. What my body had in mind was more along the lines of lying in bed half the day paralysed by indecision, trying to figure out if I should take matters into my own hands with a 6 hour public bus ride north at 6 in the morning tomorrow. (As a compromise I'd finally texted the tour office, only to be told that I needed to come in person for updates.) The other half was spent sitting on the floor feeling guilty about being in such a state (despite the fact that it was bound to happen sooner or later). But, at least there was a great view out the window! Might as well be dysfunctional somewhere scenic, am I right...

[writersmess]

DEATH WISH LOVE | EVAN BUCKLEY

gif credit

Pairing: Evan Buckley x fem!reader

Summary: Buck never thought he could love someone like that. Especially not someone with the same death wish love as him.

Warning: Anxiety crisis, near-death experience, hospital, crying, ansgt.

Word count: 2.5K

a/n: My God, I can't believe it's taken me over a year to get back. I missed this place so much. It's been an intense, crazy year. I finally got my dream job at the best hospital in Latin America. I'm so happy, but at the same time it's demanded everything of me, working long shifts almost every day, but its the price I have to pay. I hope you like this one, it was based on the song Death Wish Love by Benson Boone, which as soon as I heard it I immediately imagined something with our dear Buck. I confess I thought I'd do something angsty, but I don't think I have that capacity, he already suffers so much that I just wanted him to have a happy ending this time.

Masterlist

................................

You were the new firefighter in 118, and also new to the city. In order to follow your dreams, you left your hometown with everyone and everything you knew. You craved for bigger things, you wanted the big city, you wanted Los Angeles.

The team welcomed you with open arms, which was unusual to you. You weren’t used to this or neither known by your affectionate gestures, but apparently everything was an excuse for a hug at the station. It was a bit hard to get used to all this affection, especially when you came from a place where you were always by yourself.

That was one of the main reasons you became a firefighter, you have walked through fire every single day of your life, why not make it your profession?

You were a source of curiosity between the team, always so quiet and so resistant to everyone's affection. It was hard to win you over. Especially because you had a rather difficult personality, you were fearless at work, you weren't afraid to go into the fire to save lives, you did it without thinking twice.

To Bobby you were a cause of concern, and sometimes the reason why he was having trouble sleeping. He knew this personality very well. It was the same one he had struggled for years to learn to deal with, the one he had to fight with so many times, he was very familiar with this death wish love, it was the same as Buck’s.

The blue-eyed man on the other side, couldn't understand why he couldn't take his eyes off you. Ever since you arrived a few months ago, your image has been running through Buck’s mind. You've become a challenge for him. But not in a bad way, he wanted to get to know you, he wanted to understand you. But you didn't make things any easier for him, especially when today was the first time he'd seen you laugh.

"You're drooling" he snapped back to reality when he heard Eddie mocking next to him.

"Shut up" Buck said, turning his gaze back to you playing with his niece.

You had a beauty he couldn't explain, an angelic one. You had this steely gaze and looking at you felt like suicide. He would fall to his knees if you asked him to. How could someone so delicate also be so dangerous?

The way you were reluctant to follow Bobby's orders, you'd walk into the fire without a second thought. You would take risks without thinking about your own safety, just thinking about everyone else. He saw how hard you worked, he saw how mad Bobby got when he ordered the building to be evacuated and you were always the last one to leave. You were intriguing and he was fascinated.

It was so strange for you. Being in Maddie's living room, with everyone gathered together like a big family, laughing and telling funny stories. The team met once a week, with all the families together, the children running around the living room, the smell of food in the air, the voices, the laughter.

You accepted the invitation after a few months of refusing, and now you spent the week looking forward to the moment when you would be together again.

Sometimes when you got home from a meeting, you cried. You cried because you never had that, you never had anyone who cared about you. You were an unexpected pregnancy, your parents didn't planned you, they didn't want you and that was never a secret to anyone.

And that's why you were surprised when one day you arrived early at the station and Hen had a cake for you that you had once said reminded of what your grandmother used to bake.

Or when another one Eddie handed you a drawing that Chris made specifically for you. Of the two of you playing together.

Or when Maddie sent you, through Chim, the cookies you said you loved one day while you were having coffee together.

Or when Bobby invited you to have lunch with him and Athena on a Sunday ‘cause he knew you were going to do it alone.

Or when Buck gave you a book he'd heard you say was your favorite during a conversation.

*

It was mid-afternoon on a Sunday. Your hands were shaking, your heart pounding. The words your father had once spoken echoed in your mind. "You will never be loved". But you were at a table with 118's entire family, and you felt loved. Maddie told you about the gossip from her work. Karen hugged you from the side every time you passed by her. Hen included you in every conversation. Athena calmly answered all the questions you were curious about her work. So why did you feel like an imposter? Why was your father's voice echoing inside your head? Why were you on the verge of an anxiety attack?

"I'll be right back" you muttered to the girls, but you realized how shaky your voice sounded. You were pathetic.

You barely made it to the bathroom, your legs buckled and you sat down in the corner of the room. You could hardly breathe, it was hard to pull in the air. Tears streamed down your face. Your heart was racing. Your hands were shaking.

You heard your voice being called from outside. Damn. You couldn't calm down, your hand was on your chest as if it could make the pain go away.

"Hey, hey. I'm here. Calm down, I’ve got you" it was Buck.

His voice was just a whisper in your ear. You let a sob escape your lips. Pathetic. You felt his arms around you, until you were all wrapped up in his arms. Why was he doing that? Why did he care?

He stayed there until you stopped crying. You were still in his arms, and it was so warm, so safe. Sighs came from your lips, and you couldn't imagine what a mess Buck's head and heart were in. He wanted you in his arms, not just now.

"I'm sorry," you whispered and tried to pull away, but he wouldn't let you, so you stayed.

"You don't have to talk about what's going on in there, but the day you feel like you need a hug to cry into, you've got mine" your eyes filled with tears again. "And don't ever apologize for it"

*

The smiles on your lips were becoming constant. And it was Buck's favorite image. You were letting people through your armor, you were letting your guard down, and it felt good. You now baked pies and cakes for the station on your days off, recipes learned from the girls after a few long afternoons of chatting and coffee.

Your laughter was contagious, and the boys would always crack little jokes to get them out of you.

Your eyes were now looking out for a pair of blue ones, all the time, everywhere. Eyes that were always looking back at you. Your hands were always looking for an excuse to bump into Buck's, just to feel that shiver run down your spine every time. And he would find any reason to text you, until the excuses became routine. You woke up every day with a good morning message and went to bed with a good night one. The little touches now became big gestures, Buck loved to brush your hair out of your face and tuck them behind your ear. And you loved to run your hand over the birthmark above his eye. You loved when his warm lips traveled up your neck to your lips. You loved when his hands ran over your body always so slowly and so gently, bringing goosebumps wherever they went. You loved making love with him. How he worshiped your body, how much he worshiped you. The way he made you feel loved.

You had a hold on Buck, and you didn't even know it. He had become attached to you, attached to the idea of having you by his side. The nights with you were the ones he could truly rest in, the mornings where he woke up to your soft kisses on his face, were the ones he would keep forever in his mind.

But he could feel that you were still resisting his feelings, and he was terrified of losing you. Buck was in love with you. It took months for him to realize that, but he did it. He loved you.

But one thing has never changed. And as Buck followed the loud murmurs coming from Bobby’s office, where he knew you were at, he kept in mind the danger you were in at every call. He couldn't lose you.

"Hey, what happe-" he couldn't finish the sentence when he saw you walking out the door, since you brushed past him, bumping into his shoulder, without even looking him in the face.

Buck made his way to the room, where he saw his captain wiping his hands across his face, letting out an exhausted sigh.

"She'll end up dead if she keep acting like this, Buck"

"I know"

"After the last call, if she doesn't change her behavior, I'll be forced to suspend her."

"I know."

Buck couldn't lose you.

You couldn't talk to Buck yet, you were so nervous after your conversation with Bobby. You were trying your best, how could he tell you that you had a death wish love? You were saving lives, and it didn't matter if it cost you your own. You didn't care.

A new call ecoed through the station. It was something big. A fire in a shed. People were working at the time, so there were many likely victims. You were anxious, just as you were before any call, but you were ready for it. You were born ready.

"Be careful," Buck told you before you got off the truck and you nodded. You were always careful "I love you"

You turned surprised to Buck, you'd never said that to each other before. It disconcerted you.

"Buck, I-"

Before you could say anything, you heard Bobby calling you to give instructions and you had to run.

I love you.

The words echoed in your head as you entered the burning building. No one had ever said that to you. You didn't even know the weight those words carried.

"Sir, follow this path and the fireman will take you to the exit."

It was so hot. You'd already lost count of how many people you'd pulled out of the line of fire. Your head was heavy. It was getting hard to breathe.

"Evacuate the building now," you could hear Cap saying over the radio. Everyone agreed and gave their location. You were about to respond when you heard something.

It was a call for help.

You could have sworn it was a call for help.

"Captain, I'm in the east side, I hear someone screaming for help. I'm close, I can get them out"

"Negative, the building will collapse at any moment. Get out immediately"

Your vision was blurred.

I love you.

You couldn't go out and leave those people to die, so you went ahead. The way to the door was difficult, there was a lot of rubble, and when you opened it, you froze in place.

It was empty. The fire danced in front of you, mocking you. But the cries for help... you've never been so wrong before.

I love you.

“It’s empty” you murmured at the radio.

Bobby was shouting your name from the other end of the radio. You turned around, but it was so hard to breathe. You tried to find your way back, but everything was spinning. Buck was now calling your name.

I love you.

His words were running through your head. Your steps were now slow. The way out, you couldn't find the way out. You could hear the fire laughing at you. Stupid. Pathetic. You heard an explosion behind you, and it threw you off balance, bringing you to the ground. You'd been walking through fire all your life, and now it would finally take its place back. Your siren buzzed in your ears. That would be the end of you.

I love you too, Buck.

The moment Buck came out of the building and didn't see you outside, he tried to go back. But hands held him in place.

This couldn't be happening. No, no.

Bobby called your name on the radio and you didn't answer. It's empty. That was the last answer they got. You weren't answering. An explosion. On the east side, where you were.

Buck's knees gave way, and he went down. All eyes were on the exit of the building waiting for you, waiting for a miracle. But it never came.

Buck screamed, and he would scream until his lungs gave up.

Time seemed to stop. Buck's screams were the only noise to be heard. And another explosion. Tears rolled down trough some faces. No one could believe it. This couldn't be happening.

Buck couldn't lose you like this.

"We found her" some voice echoed over the radio.

Buck's heart could stop any second now.

But the building was collapsing.

He broke free from his friends and ran into the building, dodging all the fallen and burnt obstacles, and he saw you. You were in the arms of a fireman. He ran up to you and carried you out of the building. As soon as you stepped onto the sidewalk, the building collapsed. Buck held you in his arms with all his strength and ran, feeling the debris fly past you.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry" was the first thing that came out of your lips when he put you on the stretcher and he shut you up, pressing his lips to yours.

Buck analyzed each of your wounds alongside Hen and Chim and you could see the tears streaming down Buck's face, the ones that were also streaming down your own.

You were still struggling to breathe, every inch of your body ached, and you felt on the verge of losing consciousness. Until you succumbed to the darkness that was calling your name.

*

You woke up a few hours later in hospital. Your hands were being squeezed and you could feel something wet running down over them. Tears.

Buck had his face in your hands, he had never felt so afraid before. And when he heard your voice calling him, it was as if he could finally breathe.

"I'm sorry, Buck, I-I don't know what happened-"

"I almost lost you today"

Your heart broke into a million pieces. You did this to him, your recklessness, your impulsive behavior. It was your fault.

"I'm sorry"

Tears were now streaming down your face and he moved closer, running his hands gently down your cheeks.

"I was terrified of losing you. I'd die if I do."

"I would never leave you"

"Promise?"

"I love you, Buck. And I'll love you to death"

"Please don't let it be soon"

You smiled. No one had ever loved you like that.

"It won't."

[barcalover86]

Unreal nightmare - Gavi

Summary: "How can I learn to live without you when you taught me how to be alive"

"Your relationship was a private one, and we didn't really get to see you two a lot. How was she?" one of the reporters asked.

Pablo chuckled a bit.

"She was so fearless." he started. "Energetic and chaotic kind of girl, you know. Wherever she was, she would bring the light after her. You couldn't feel sad or hopeless around her."

"She seemed like a really nice person."

"Yes, because she was."

Pablo had to stop because he knew that if he would say one more word, he was going to cry. He hated the tight feeling inside his neck.

The older man comforted the boy, putting one of his hands on Gavi's shoulder, while massaging it.

After a few seconds, Pablo continued.

"Before I met her, I only found happiness in winning. But she taught me to enjoy the process, to be thankful that I am healthy and that I have a house where I can sleep and that I have a really loving family that supports me."

"That's so kind of her."

"Yes, she was really kind. To everyone."

He smiled sadly while thinking about you.

"So tell us, Gavi. What happened? One day, she was out there cheering your name, and the next one, we found out that she had passed away? How come?"

The boy started to tear up. His hands reached his face, not wanting to let the world see his pain.

Everyone felt so sorry for him. They all knew how much he loved you and how happy you had made him.

"Just one day, she started scratching all over her body. We were all really confused especially when her eyes got yellow."

"Oh.."

"Yeah.. such a bad memory. Well, then we got her quickly to the hospital, and we stayed there for about 5-6 hours to get her a doctor. She then started to be in so much pain."

"She was having some allergy?"

"I hoped so, but she was not. We found out that she had liver cancer."

"I'm really sorry, Gavi-"

"We took her to the best doctor, but it was all too much for her and after only 1 month of being in the hospital, they let her home for the 'she better dies home with her family, rather than alone' kinda reason".

"But.. After only 1 month, it was that crucial??"

"Liver cancer is extremely dangerous and painful. It expands incredibly fast."

"And she was staying at your house while you just had to pretend that everything was fine... to not worry the people around you."

"Something like that, yes. But our families were there to help me out with her. As I said before, everyone loved her."

"How did she die?"

"She lived more than any doctor said she would. But God.. she looked so different and drained. Even at her worst, she was asking for everyone's health" Gavi laughed a bit.

The reporter smiled.

"I don't know if it was bad or if I'm thankful that she died in my arms.."

"Oh, Gavi-"

"Don't start, please," he once again teared up. "I just don't understand why she had to suffer like that when she was the most angelic person that I've met. She was so, so young.."

"How old was she?"

"17."

A loud silence acapared the room.

No one knew what to say in these situations.

--------------‐---------------------‐---------------------‐------

"Gavi, go to sleep! Tomorrow you have a big game and you have to be rested."

"Pedri, please leave me alone."

"Then I'd be a bad friend. C'mon, brother, go have a nap. I know you're tired."

"I can't sleep, Pedri! Ok? If I close my eyes I only see her dead in front of me!"

"Pablo-"

"Everyone is dreaming about the healthy version of her, and I'm the only one that can't even imagine my girlfriend being.. normal and real and-"

"Gavi! Stop!" Pedri began. "You saw her at her worst. It's normal to have that imagine painted in your brain for a period of time. But that definitely doesn't mean that you are not able to also dream about her when she was all healthy."

"I'm afraid that she forgot me and only looks out for her family and not me, Pedri."

"Don't say that! You know that's not true at all."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Because we both know that she loved you more than anyone. Now go to sleep and let's have a great game tomorrow so that you can win for her, alright?"

--------------‐---------------------‐---------------------‐------

"Gavira, do you want to play?" Xavi asked the footballer.

"Yes."

"Ok then, go change!"

Before the game, Pablo had promised himself to give his all for you.

And he did that.

He helped his team a lot.

He didn't see you along the crowd, but he somehow felt you in him. You made him stronger and he even scored. Just. For. You.

"She'd be so proud of you, boy."

And then Gavi looked into the sky and saw your shadow.

And then he smiled.

People were cheering his name, and he then promised himself that he would continue to fight for life, just like you did. You fought for every second of life because every moment matters. And by your absence, he learned to appreciate things more. He learned that to live is the most incredible gift that we, humans, have.

[turbulenthandholding]

Richie as Director Avatar and Taylor Swift

I was talking with @thoughtfulchaos773 earlier today and something occurred to me about Richie singing Love Story in Forks. There has been a lot of really wonderful meta lately touching on Richie's role in the show. There's @currymanganese's excellent point that Richie is Storer's avatar as well as all of @thoughtfulchaos773's posts about Filmmaking and Season 3/Richie as Director (Part 1 / Part 2).

Anyway, previously I hadn't thought much about Love Story being the Taylor Swift song that they had Richie sing. It's well known, it's a song that would make sense that his young daughter would gravitate towards and would have exposed him to. There's a purity and joy to it that fits with the earnestness he gains in his journey throughout the action of Forks. However, with the context of all of the other great meta out there, it occurred to me that if we think of Richie as Director and Observer of Carmy's Love Life (as thoughtfulchaos773 called him in Filmmaking Meta Part 1), the choice of Love Story as the song is a LOT more significant. Richie is telling viewers what the story of The Bear is...it's a love story. And it's a love story with Sydney as opposed to the horror/haunting story that's being laid out with Claire (here and here and probably others I'm not finding right now).

I've also been trying to make sense of the use of Long Live, which plays in the background of the conversation that Richie has with Frank in Violet. I was expecting to get another Taylor Swift song in Season 3, but all of the guesses I had made were more directly tied to Richie's plot and story (This is Me Trying was my main prediction). So I was very surprised that the song they picked was Long Live. But in considering Richie as Director Surrogate, this choice starts to make a lot of sense.

I don't think the choice of song is trying to say anything about Richie and Tiff's relationship, or Richie getting over her, or his maturity in handling the conversation with Frank. Long Live is a song that Taylor Swift wrote for her band, in celebration of her first headlining tour (for Fearless). In our chat, @thoughtfulchaos773 suggested that Long Live is a reference to Richie's looking back and reflecting at The Beef (and contrasting the experience of working at The Beef with the experience of working at The Bear) and hoping that sense of comradery and joy is able to be found at The Bear eventually -- and I think that makes a lot of sense.

I said remember this feeling I passed the pictures around Of all the years that we stood there on the sidelines Wishing for right now We are the kings and the queens You traded your baseball cap for a crown When they gave us our trophies And we held them up for our town And the cynics were outraged Screaming, "This is absurd" 'Cause for a moment, a band of thieves In ripped up jeans got to rule the world

There are a couple of other things that stand out to me in the song:

I was screaming, "Long live all the magic we made" And bring on all the pretenders, I'm not afraid

Magic and sleight-of-hand are themes that come up in Season 3, and it may be because I have Unreasonable Hospitality on the brain, but it is important to Richie, who lists the dream weave as one of his non-negotiables. Will Guidara writes in UH that for a while at Eleven Madison Park, they used a literal magic trick to reveal dessert to guests during one of their courses. And EMP also employed an entire team of Dreamweavers whose sole responsibility was to make hospitality personal and special for their guests (seen in Season 3 in the scene with the Surprise with the cake and Richie singing happy birthday in Spanish). I don't necessarily think they picked the song to make this reference but there is a through line there, even if unintended -- and I do think that, dropped fork notwithstanding, Richie's journey towards Unreasonable Hospitality genuinely has become his purpose.

The second thing that stands out to me, which might well be more of an intentional reference, comes from the last verse (which plays as Richie asks Frank about how he got his house):

Will you take a moment? Promise me this That you'll stand by me forever But if, God forbid, fate should step in And force us into a goodbye If you have children someday When they point to the pictures Please tell them my name Tell them how the crowds went wild Tell them how I hope they shine

I am reminded of this very excellent meta of @currymanganese's which posits the name of the restaurant Fairest Creatures alludes to one of Shakespeare's procreation sonnets. I think this verse alludes to (or directs our attention towards):

Season 3's theme of legacy

The hope of reconciliation between Richie and Carmy

An allusion to Carmy's future children and sharing the legacy of The Beef/The Bear with them

[ayeeedomino]

Ateez 9th member

Roux and her dates

Ryujin:

Roux and Ryujin were talking via SNS, about their tour plans and countries they will be in the future. The two have been to unofficial dates before, but never a formal one at that. Ryujin sent a a flirt message:

“Why don’t you come have dinner with me and then we talk more? 👀”

“Sure babe😉”

With that settled, at a Friday they met up in front of a famous trendy restaurant in Seoul. As the night went by, they got talking about their time together at JYP, their dreams and goals, and their personal life.

"You know, Jinnie, there's something I've been wanting to share with you. Ive been seeing your performances and I really admire your confidence on stage and how effortlessly you command attention. It's truly captivating, as if you cast a spell on them.”

"Wow, thanks babe. That means a lot coming from you, you’re gonna make me blush. Honestly, I've always been in hypnotized by your stage presence! You really evolved, it’s like a whole different girl from the one I met back then.”

"Thanks darling. It's not always easy, but when I'm up there, it's like I'm in my element. And being able to connect with fans through music, it's a feeling like no other. And the guys been helping me build my confidence. But what have you been up to in your rest days??”

Ryujin gives her little charming chuckle and proceeds saying; "In my rest days? Well, you know I like to rest at home, like binge watching some new tv show, listening to music, and cooking! You know is like a therapy for me!”

As Roux smiles, she throws a shot; “You know, next time you rest you can call me to cuddle, right?”

"Yeah, I will, it sounds nice. You know, you continue being fearless. You're not afraid to be you, and that's a rare quality.“

Roux looks into her eyes and says; "Thank you, but it’s not hard when I’m around you, you are captivating.”

Ryujin smiles and reaches to hold Roux hands; "You know, you mean a lot to me..and also,we could be a very hot pair…”

“I know right?..” as she giggles, they both continue enrolling through the night, wondering about what could be their future together…

Yves:

They don’t really know each other, but one day Roux sent a message complimenting Yves a story she posted. Yves replied complimenting her back and they started talking. A few weeks later Yves decided to invite her to a night out.

They first meet up at a trendy bar known for its lively atmosphere and creative cocktails. As they chat over drinks, they discover shared interests in music, fashion, and travel, sparking a sense of excitement for the night ahead.

After a few drinks, they move to a nearby club where they start dancing, they feel free. As they lose themselves in the music, dancing together with uninhibited joy and passion, their laughter blending seamlessly with the rhythm of the crowd.

As the night passes, they take breaks from dancing to share intimate conversations in quieter corners of the club, getting to know each other on a deeper level amidst the vibrant energy of the night.

"Roux, can I be honest with you for a moment?"

Roux smiles and says; "Of course, unnie. What's on your mind?"

After a deep breath she said; "I just want to say that I've really enjoyed getting to know you. There's something about your presence that's so captivating and genuine. I feel like I can be myself around you."

Roux blushes; "Thank you unnie. I feel the same way about you. It's rare to meet someone at first sight who understands you on such a deep level, you know?"

Yves nods; "Yeah, it is rare. But with you, it feels natural. I admire your strength and your passion for life. You have this inner light that shines so brightly, and it's impossible not to be drawn to it."

"Wow, thanks unnie. That means a lot to me. And you, there's a kindness in your eyes that speaks volumes. It's like you see the beauty in everyone and everything around you."

Yves looks away into the crowd before proceeding; "I try my best. But with you, it's easy. There's something about you that brings out the best in people. I feel like I can open up to you in ways I never thought possible."

Roux looks down to Yves hands, looks up where their eyes meet, and gently takes her hands; "I'm glad you feel that way. Even thought we only met personally today, I feel like I’ve known you for a long time."

As Yves squeezes her hands, she said; "Me too. I don't know what the future holds for us, but I do know that I want you to be a part of it. You've captivated me."

Roux leans very close to Yves, before whispering; "Then let's make the most of every moment we have together. Whatever the future may bring." before pulling her back to the dance floor.

As the early hours of the morning approach, they decide to call it a night, their hearts racing with adrenaline and their faces flushed with excitement. With promises to do it all again soon, Roux and Yves part ways, their spirits lifted by the unforgettable memories they've created together on this exhilarating date.

Giselle:

Giselle and Roux met back in 2020, when their schedules overlapped. Since then they kept talking and going out. Roux just called Giselle and asked her to come over.

They start by watching random tv shows, before watching the movie “Carol”. The movie is pretty intense, and made them cry at the end. As it ended they started discussing their favorite scenes, moments and critics of the movie. That lead to an intimate conversation.

“You know Roux, I really connect with you! We share similar struggles, issues, and moments. I feel you and I match.”

“I feel that way too! I guess we both dealt with bad comments from the media..”

“Yes! Talking about that, how are you dealing with that scandal? I mean, it’s bad enough to have people eyeing your personal life, but something so intimate as sexuality must be shit.”

“I mean, I guess I’m fine? Yeah it’s annoying, but that’s nothing really I can do? Dealing with this industry have so many problems, but also have me the ability to share my music, my passion, something so dear to me…and have so many supporters feels nice, you know?”

“Yeah, I know. Feels nice to not feel alone.”

After a moment of quiet, she said:

“I don’t mean to be weird or make you uncomfortable, but is it true?”

“Yeah, it is.”

“Oh, hope you don’t let anything bad get to your head, because you are a really amazing person, intelligent and gorgeous at that.”

“Oh stop you’ll make me blush.”

“You know, I’ve never really thought of myself being with a girl…I guess I never gave myself the time to really think. All of my life I just thought I had to like men, before I even stop to think what I really like..”

“Oh I know that feeling. I guess you just have to have some introspective moment with yourself, do you see yourself with a woman? With a man? Or both? Do you see yourself settling down with all of them? Or just one of them? Guess you should just really think, and don’t pressure yourself with it! Everyone have their own time!”

“Thanks….though I feel like I wouldn’t mind doing any of that with you…of course, slowly, but if you are open to it, I wouldn’t mind…”

As they cuddle together, they spent the rest of the night talking and just being comfortable with each other.

Yunjin:

This year 2024 Coachella happens to have both Le Sserafim and Ateez performing. What a better excuse to have more time together? First they meet backstage and go out to see other head liners. But at their day off they decided to go to an amusement park.

They arrive early, eager to beat the crowds and make the most of their time. Hand in hand, they start with the roller coasters, laughing and screaming as they race through loops and twists, adrenaline pumping through their veins.

Afterward, they explore the various attractions, from the dizzying heights of the Ferris wheel to the exhilarating drops of the Tower of Terror. With each ride, they bond over shared excitement and occasional nervousness, reassuring each other with comforting words and playful nudges.

As they stroll through the park, they indulge in classic carnival treats like cotton candy and funnel cakes, savoring the sweetness of the moment as they exchange stories and inside jokes.

Feeling adventurous, they challenge each other to games of skill and chance, determined to win each other stuffed animals as souvenirs of their unforgettable day.

As the sun sets and the park lights up with colorful displays, they find themselves on the carousel, riding side by side on majestic horses, feeling like carefree children lost in a whirlwind of joy and wonder.

As the night comes to a close, they share a quiet moment on a bench, watching the fireworks paint the sky with bursts of light and color. With hearts full of happiness and memories to last a lifetime, they share a tender kiss, grateful for the magic of their day at the amusement park.

"I've been thinking a lot lately about life, you know? A few years ago I thought I would just become a lawyer, but now I am here, traveling the world, seeing so many different cultures, exploring the world.”

“I get it, seeing all of this make you feel so accomplished."

“You know, whenever I’m with you, it’s like the world stops, the sounds fades, it’s just you and me.”

“That's exactly how I feel too. You just always manage to make so comfortable, so nice."

"And I love that. I love how we can just be ourselves with each other, no pretenses, no expectations."

"Me too. It's like we have this special connection that's just ours, you know?"

"Yeah, I do. And I never want to take it for granted.."

“I'm truly grateful for tonight. It was a cool way to rewind."

“You’re right.” With that they share an embrace watching the sun go down.

[spade-riddles]

Submission: Ed Louis Harry and 🎃

I’m the Ed Sheeran anon and further to the Ed, Taylor Harry, Louis links I wanted to add some further things if that’s ok!

Taylor refers to someone being ‘too young to know the song intertwined in the magic fabric of our dreaming’, among many other Louis Tomlinson song titles littered throughout TTPD.

In bejewelled we see the clock showing exile ends at midnight. The clock has the numbers 3,6,9 missing. Louis has plugged ‘3,6,9’ since 2022 alongside his album faith in the future. 3,6,9,(12)??. He has also said: he has written songs for other artists that he isn’t credited on. He also said his third album will be the kind of music he wants to make, that album 2 - faith in the future(3,6,9) is a kind of bridge between album 1 and the sound he wants to have by LT3. This was a reference to genre but if we are building to midnight.. LT3 would be his midnight like TS12 is Taylor’s. He has just registered a song called ‘Hello’ which reminded me of message 13 🎃.

wildest dreams and perfect are songs overtly related to each other, perfect was written by Harry and Louis and to Larry’s seems to nod to their relationship, despite the appearance it’s about Taylor in the same way HStyles is the Style red herring.

Within the days of the 1989 TV drop, Louis made a very vague unprompted Larry denial on Twitter that was immediate picked up and ran in the press (without once mentioning the word Larry in the Twitter question or response). I believe this took place on 31st October: the veil between this life and the next, thinner than ever🎃.

Again in the week or so lead up to the TTPD release, Louis made a Larry denial in an interview stating Larry’s are so ‘intertwined with what they believe’ there’s nothing he can do, nothing he can say - so be it. I checked the dates and it’s close to an anon spade msg here from April 10 that could maybe reference that? Aside from the intertwined parallels in his denial/Tays music and the 🎃, this denial has also been picked up to be referencing the lyrics of the song total eclipse of the heart… My only one, smoking gun, my eclipsed sun ❤️

He quietly dropped his live tour album the week of TTPD and tweeted a screen shot of him ‘listening’ to a song of his thought to be about closeting, but the song was paused at ‘13’ seconds which Louis fans have taken as support for Taylor.

The track Peter is no. 28- to Louis fans that’s his number the way that 13 is Taylor’s. He has it tattooed on his knuckles. Peter, my lost fearless leader, he also has a song called fearless asking someone if they remember being young enough to get it wrong in front of all these people. Taylor ordered ‘Louis champagne ‘ for $28,00 recently. I really think she wants us to be looking at Louis.

I did notice ‘face the music’ (a Louis song) written in the 🎃 messages as well as ‘they’ll say we’re lucky’ or something, another song of his ‘we were lucky once, I could be lucky again’. 🎃also constantly references faith like faith in the future.

But daddy I love him! Nods to harry’s t shirt (prior to BDILH searching that phrase would lead to basically just Larry edits and fanfiction) and also lyrically nodding to kiwi ‘I’m having your baby! it’s none of your business’ which for Larry’s evokes babygate. Louis has been loud on tour, changing a lyric in back to you to visibly mouth ‘I love him!’ every night for months. BDILH references braids which I think comes up again and again in the album, these braids (and as 🎃 says ropes) and intertwined fabric of our dreaming, or ‘stiching we were just kids babe’ pointing to Louis: ‘we were kids just trying to work it out’ .

As the other Ed Sheeran anon said, Ed tweeted about his best friends wedding on the 28th and Harry’s Joni lyric referenced the town hall- as does BDILH. 28 is Louis number, believed to be for this reason- some sort of commitment on that day so 28 September is a super significant date- I read somewhere Taylor did a cover of a song changing a lyric to ‘love was born on the 28th of September’ when it was supposed to be the 21st.

The Ed album fascinated me as both a Larry and Gaylor. It is littered with so many symbolic references to LT,TS and HS and then understanding the lyrics I find it’s difficult to discern if they are about Louis, Harry or Taylor narrative wise. It has a clock as one of the art symbols, showing its nearly 12 and a track called midnight. There is literally a ‘Bowery bar’ reference.

Ed’s song ‘friends’ has always felt like it was about Larry and he has played shows with imagery of a couple that looks like an exact clip of Larry in the background. 🎃 talks about friends - and friends of friends and I think as the other anon said Ed is such a close link between these two parallel stories. In promo of autumn variations he brought up how he loves pop and how great NSYNC and Britney Spears are. To me these are two tortured poets- one being a boy band including Lance Bass, a closeted band member who has since come out .. and that Taylor exchanged a friendship bracelet with. Two being Brittney who is evoked on the album thank u Aimee/*~ if you seek amy~. It seems Easter eggy that Ed referenced those two artists but that could be a reach.

I’ve been looking into Harry, Louis and Taylor’s allusions to ‘home’, ‘America’ and ‘London/England’ and they all tell an interesting story together about the safety of England, Taylor has loved that place for so long . The track English girl in an American town raised eyebrows if you consider it to be American girl in an English town, or, if the girl in the song is Harry. Lighthouses, darkness, the cold, ships, burning things down, being with your lover at night and then having to go to work for weeks.. these things are all in Ed’s album.

Taylor could make out the fairy lights through the mist in so long, London and in Ed’s song England the picturesque town ‘has fairy lights on the building supplying us power from the sea’. On open day, the town is cleaned up: the stones are hidden, the lighthouse is retired and a new one that’s taller hired. The town has a pub with a flag working flexible hours (glass closet, in my mind). The album also refers to things being in shade, or things being painted black (‘a home made of stones painted black’ for e.g). That song England solved the mystery of the nonsensical phrases in keep driving in Harry’s house: ‘choke her with a sea view, tooth ache, bad news, just act normal’ . The stone homes painted black have a glass window out at the back of them for the view (the sea view) as in, contrived moments giving a look into the privacy of the homes. There is only one sign in the town and people slow down to look on open day in Ed’s song, but harry says should we just keep driving?

The autumn variations cover art symbols have a grave with ‘bad news’ written on it, and a ring for ‘good news’. Along with a bird that looks like the tattoo on his chest and other lyrical allusions like to having a cup of tea ☕️ with a friend called Matilda; who doesn’t have to go home. (who is so Taylor in my mind). On tour he always began the song: this song is for a friend of mine it means a lot to me and I hope one day it will mean a lot to you, too. which I always found confusing but if comingoutlor is happening it makes sense to me as Matilda tied up her hair like it’s no big deal (like the now tight hair pins, no longer dropping, shown in TTPD vids) and is hosting a party with her friends but not the family who never showed her love (to be clear I don’t think of that so literally to be saying her blood family)

There are so many other parallels in their music: Harry’s been praying, ever since New York. Louis says he knows you left a part of you in New York. Taylor says… you know I left a part of me in New York. New York for me is the 1989 era: the girls and girls boys and boys, it is an interrelated, intertwined closet and why I think 🎃 references ‘wildest dreams’. We also have a lot of imagery parallels with the moon and saturn, ladders, clocks, the wizard of Oz, Alice in wonderland that all three use. As well as meeting in the hallway..

In exile WB and TS say they gave so many signs, all this time!!!! Louis has a song called all this time: ‘just have patience…’ ’building mountains hoping that they’ll turn to gold.. the friends we make, the love it takes it’s worth it, all this time’ reminds me of karma taking all my friends to the summit.

He has references about fabricated fairytales, half told stories and love being a lie in his music. One or two music videos show a group of people all standing together, uniting to be victorious I believe it’s in ‘we made it’ or ‘silver tongues’. (I am an I think Louis or both Harry and Louis are William Bowery clown, if you can’t tell🤡!! ). Louis has ‘sat down with a master plan’ and TS is a ‘mastermind’, which written on a shirt worn by Louis recently. Louis being with prince william within days of Taylor was so suss to me!!

Sorry that’s so long - I recently have clicked that my two separate interests in Gaylor and Larry come together in so many ways🙊🙊

[berlinini]

some Thoughts about the 02 show (while the days of ltwt show recaps the length of essays are gone, I thought I'd share some stuff)(this of course got kinda long anyways, I am nothing but predictable!)

first of all it's so interesting to go online after a show and "consume" the show through different perspectives... I was in the pit close to the sound booth and could see a tiny Louis like tunnel vision (and not even always - I had to look at the screens a lot more than any previous shows). I had never been to such a big venue and it felt like the arenas I'd be previously - it's so hard to gage. Anyways when I saw Louis' IG post I realized how far I was and seeing pictures and videos of the venue - I truly hadn't realized the sheer number of people. Also the lights project from our POV seemed to have bombed but seeing the videos, it did create the intended effect. Also I was so far that I had to ask the gc for the color of the pants (#purple #slay) and only in the encore, when there was a camera on Louis' entire body, did I notice the shoes (unfortunately my eyes deceived me into thinking they were Nike). I missed all the little quirky faces and interactions that I now see in gifs. HOWEVER I did not miss the several times Louis teared up including during Chicago and during his speeches and I tell you my heart was bursting. I love that he talked a bit more than usual - I think he said something like "I can't put into words... well let me try" and he said everything so perfectly! The reference to his dreams and the "we" - I just listened to him and thought how much I love him. His special thanks to his band was super sweet.

setlist: HOTH safe! If I hadn't known DMD was back on the setlist I wouldn't have recognized it. No 7 :( I tolerate Angels Fly but tbh I don't understand how it's there and not like Headline or Always You or FEARLESS. High in Cali was hilarious because you could tell weed isn't legal in the UK lmao - the vibe was so different than back home. 505 still so good and now I can sing every single lyrics but in a very oh poor me, the show ruined my 5 x 505 streak this year since it's now 6. But 505 Laval you'll always be #1 in my Heart <3. We Made It is still the It Girl and Silver Tongues... I doubt a closer will ever come this close (hehe) to how fucking epic it is. Tbh I could hardly tell when the string section was playing but I'm glad I had a show with strings! Me still in LTWT mode wondering why the pyro didn't go off during Walls only to be told there hasn't been any for this tour ouuuups. The Megamix SLAYS so hard and the special effects were SO cool! I did miss the classic rainbow lights for SIBWAWC cuz the lasers didn't reflect on the crowd as nicely but the clouds and at the beginning of ATT were beautiful.

Talking about lasers I was eyeing this guy in the soundbooth that I'd never see before and was clowning about him being there for the LIVE ALBUM RECORDING. I even took notes to figure out later where he works (spare a thought for tumblr user bbrox who has to put up with my insanity). ONLY to figure out 1 hour later that the guy was the special lasers guy as made so obvious by the fact he packed up his stuff after Saturdays in a box that said "laser fx triangle C" lololol. Sometimes I think it's good to clown for nothing - be humbled!

I saw most of the crew in the soundbooth - the person I was with was trying to spot the Tomlinsons while I was looking for Oli and K and was mentally putting a check on names for the sound and lights guys - priorities! (Blaming Red Rocks for having us go down the rabbit hole of every single member of the crew)

Oh yeah the KMM lights! It was kinda spontaneous? He had a little shy smile like he was telling himself 'look at this lot' and it was soooo adorable. I'm glad I got to be a part of it <3 Which pretty much summarizes this whole show - witnessing a moment in history.

Finally - TANK TOP LOUIS WITH MY OWN 2 EYES!!!!!! And what a tank top!!! #blessed #cantspellslutwithoutlt

Everyone's been saying being a louie is for life and that just keep getting stronger and stronger everytime I get to see him perform! Can't wait for future shows!!!

[jeannefostergoriot]

Peter by Taylor Swift x The Song twins

(It’s Linh about Tam while he was with the Neverseen and she couldn’t contact him, and then when they fight about Rayni in Stellarlune)

« Forgive me, Peter, my lost fearless leader »: Tam protected her all their lives, and now, there’s a wall in-between them, and she probably feels responsible.

« In closets like cedar, preserved from when we were just kids »: saw the explanation it could be a reference to Narnia and I like the idea, like Tam and Linh are now in two different worlds, one in the closet, the other outside, Linh still dreaming another fantasy world, Tam in the war.

« Is it something I did? » when they fight, and Linh is persuaded she’s right, that trusting Rayni isn’t a good idea, and she doesn’t understand why her brother suddenly doesn’t listen to her anymore.

« The goddess of timing, once found us beguiling »: I’m not sure of the mean of beguiling, I’d guess begging, and it’s kinda what they do together. Begging to be acknowledged as twins, begging to be seen, begging to have each other always.

« She said she was trying, Peter was she lying? My ribs get the feeling she did »: timing and destiny won’t grant their request, they have been separated, and now, they don’t have each other’s mind so open and understood.

« And I didn’t wanna come down, I thought it was just goodbye for now »: Linh didn’t want to let Tam go, he had to ask her. And, was it just goodbye? It felt like eternity

« You said you were gonna grow up, then you were gonna come find me, said you were gonna grow up, then you were gonna come find me, said you were gonna grow up, then you were gonna come find me »: Tam’s promise to come back as soon as possible.

« Words from the mouths of babes, promises oceans deep, but never to keep »: the promise to always be there for each other was made when they were just children, oceans deep cause their hearts are big as the ocean, cause Linh is Hydrokinesis. And never to keep cause in the beginning of Stellarlune, we see how they struggle to actually communicate now, be ok.

« Are you still a mind-reader, a natural scene-stealer? » = did you really change with the Neverseen or are you still the brother I know?

« I’ve heard great things, Peter »: she sees him now, but she doesn’t know what she trusts, so she classifies what he says as rumors she heard.

« But life was always easier on you that she was on me »: if she was reading the post, she’d jump and say it’s not true, being a Shade was never easy, and the time with their enemies must’ve been hard too. But deep down, she’s the banished one, she’s the Girl of Floods, and being the one who stayed while he was trying to protect them by working for the Neverseen left a lot of scars.

« And sometimes it gets me, when crossing your jet-stream, we both did the best we could do »: she knows that. But doesn’t fully realize. So it hits her. That’s how things are. That’s what they did. As good as they could.

« Under the same moon in different galaxies »: they are together. Without feeling they are.

« And I didn’t wanna hang around, we said it was just goodbye for now »: Linh isn’t the type to stay pitying herself. She DON’T want to do that. She doesn’t want to hang around waiting for Tam to comeback, but can’t keep herself from it.

« And I won’t confess that I waited, but I let the lamp burn »: Linh being « I won’t say I waited for you. You hurt Keefe. You trust the enemy ». But she still loves her brother. Cause their link is even stronger than her powers.

« As the men masqueraded, I hoped you’d return, with your feet on the ground »: pretty clear, isn’t it? The world’s spinning, she wants her brother.

« Tell me that you’d learned »: Linh is begging Tam to tell her what happens, tell her she’s right

« Cause love’s never lost when perspective is earned »: cause she can not stop loving, and she will bend to see how he sees, but right now, she can’t

« And you said you’d come and get me, but you were twenty-five »: I don’t know for this one I must admit

« And the shelf life of those fantasies has expired, lost to the “Lost Boys” chapter of your life »: something broke, they are on different chapters.

« Forgive me, Peter, please know that I tried to hold on to the days when you were mine »: I’m pretty sure Linh would die trying. She’s not an adult yet.

« But the woman who sits by the window has turned out the light »: she would also try to be « reasonable », but she considers he is her light, or a big part at least

[legacygirlingreen]

hi there! I recently finished your fic called 'peace' with an ofc!xrex and was wondering if you had more information on her as a character! I am really fascinated by mae thus far and can't wait for part 2... So if it is ok I will ask a few, feel free to answer all/some/none, I am just so interested! Thank you for sharing your story with us!

whats her hobbies?

what is her biggest fear?

what is her favorite color?

What is something she cannot stand?

What is her biggest dream?

What is her biggest regret?

Introvert/extrovert?

Thank you so much for your kind message! I am glad you enjoyed my silly little story and I hope to have pt. 2 up soon! In the meantime, I thought I’d let the lovely lady herself answer your questions… so, here’s my lovely OC Mae answering some of your questions….

Hi there anon!

What are my hobbies? I love surfing! Being out on the water and shredding a wave is where I feel I was meant to be. It’s like the single most place in the galaxy where I feel the most content. Growing up on a planet that was largely covered by frigid and foggy oceans, the seas of Pabu are much more agreeable. Learning shortly after I moved here, it’s become a lovely pastime of mine. Beyond that I enjoy reading and more tactile things such as cross stitching or pottery! I don’t have much free time though, so I mostly surf!

What are my biggest fears? Uh, I like to think of myself as a fairly fearless person. I’ve seen just about any injury under the sun. I’ve been thrown into combat zones. I suppose I do worry that I will always be lonely. All my friends are slowly finding the people they are meant to be with, and I do wonder if I am always meant to be alone… not that I despise being alone… I find a lot of comfort in my own company, but still. It would be nice to have someone there at the end of the day to take some of the burden…

Favorite Colors? I like cooler toned colors! Blues and Greens are some of my favorite! Perhaps a rich green or a vibrant blue! That being said, I wear a lot of baby blue since I’ve been told it looks good on me!

Something I cannot stand? Those who belittle others. People who think they are above common decency. People unwilling to see past the surface level. Life is complex. There are rarely black or white answers. We exist within shades of gray. It is easy to see my past and judge me for actions not my own. When people are single minded it shows a lack of being willing to learn or adapt… for some reason that really upsets me. Beyond that, I tend to not like loud noises or overcrowded spaces if I can avoid them!

My biggest dream? I am not really sure if I am honest. Most days I feel as if I am living that dream. I am safe from my family. I wake up each morning in paradise. I have a sense of purpose through my work. I am doing what I always wanted to do. At the end of the day I have more to be thankful for than things to long for…

My biggest regret? Man… that’s a bit personal… perhaps leaving behind my siblings when I fled home? I know that a life on the run is not suited for younger children, however I do carry regret for leaving them behind. I always hope one day I can be reunited with some of them… however I doubt any of them would leave as I did…

Am I an introvert or extrovert? Depends on who you ask I suppose. I do not mind discussions to which I feel are worthy of having. However, I have often been described as a bit blunt at times. When I speak to people, I often do so with a reason or goal. There are times I feel overwhelmed and prefer silence. Perhaps we could call me an extroverted-introvert. Someone who can survive lively spaces, if I have the correct amount of time afterwards to recharge…

Thank you again for your questions! I love getting to talk to you all! This is a tiny reminder that my story is a work in progress, with the first part available HERE! Anyways shoutout to my friend @leenathegreengirl for capturing me first thing in the morning for this mock interview! See you all soon in my follow up… ☺️

[leiasources]

𝑺𝑾𝑬𝑬𝑻  𝑯𝑶𝑴𝑬  𝑨𝑳𝑨𝑩𝑨𝑴𝑨  𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄  𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒.    a  compilation  of  sentence  starters  from  and  inspired  by  the  film  sweet  home  alabama.  potentially  triggering  themes  present.  feel  free  to  adjust  as  necessary  but  do  not  add  to  the  list.  thank  you!

‘ your dream for me was to get out of this place and be somebody... ’

‘ how come it has to be so complicated? the truth, life... this. ’

‘ i mean, who hasn't been embarrassed by their parents at one point or another? ’

‘ are you sure? are you really sure 'cause if you're not sure, we could just go back to the car. ’

‘ well, aren't you just a big, fat liar... ’

‘ what makes you think that you can treat them like something you stepped in in those fancy shoes? ’

‘ oh, what do you want, {name}? i don't even think you know. ’

‘ i'd forgotten how beautiful this place was. ’

‘ you're right. i have changed, i don't even know that person anymore. ’

‘ this certainly is a surprise, hearing from you, you know... you being a busy girl and all. ’

‘ i remember standing there, thinking, 'oh, preacher, hurry up before he changes his mind.' ’

‘ sometimes that man makes me so mad, i could just wring his neck. ’

‘ in my entire life, i have never met anyone so manipulative, so deceitful... ’

‘ oh, come on, it's not like anybody can keep a secret around here... ’

‘ nothing is going to come between me and my protege. ’

‘ no one is going to change my mind about this. not you, not the media, not anyone. ’

‘ that's all that matters to you, isn't it? the money, the labels... you're pathetic. ’

‘ just tell me what i can do to make you happy. ’

‘ i met somebody.. and they're quite a catch... ’

‘ i, um... actually, i was thinking maybe we could have the wedding here, in my hometown.. ’

‘ well, look what the cat dragged in... ’

‘ so, what put you in jail this time? ’

‘ i'm just saying, i saw the way you two were looking at each other. ’

‘ those people are the only family you got. get your butt back in that car, drive over and see them, and then maybe we'll talk. ’

‘ the girl i knew used to be fearless. ’

‘ have you thought about children? ’

‘ you know what? i think you're right. i have had enough. ’

‘ you know i hate surprises. what's going on? ’

‘ you're shitting me, right? ’

‘ will you marry me? ’

‘ you show up here, after years without so much as a 'hey there, {name}, remember me? your wife?' or a, 'hi, honey, lookin' good. how's the family?' ’

‘ it must be exhausting, living a lie... ’

‘ hi, honey! looking good. how's the family? ’

‘ guess we all have our little secrets, don't we? ’

‘ now, {name}, you can't just go breaking into peoples houses. ’

‘ what's going on? where are we? ’

‘ look at you, all fancy, you look like you just stepped out of a magazine. ’

‘ i thought that baby would be an adventure... and it took me a while to realize that would have been your only adventure. ’

‘ please tell me he has a flaw somewhere. ’

‘ it's funny how things don't work out. ’

‘ hot damn, do we miss you around here. ’

‘ nobody finds their soulmate when they're {number} years old. ’

‘ how about another round of drinks for my friends here? ’

‘ oh, i missed you alright, but at this range my aim is bound to improve. ’

‘ i can't believe you're still wearing that same stupid hat. ’

‘ i never meant to hurt you, or anybody else for that matter. ’

‘ if you think i'm going to let some girl talk you into getting married... ’

‘ would you mind terribly if we kept this to ourselves for a few days? ’

‘ i've dealt with an awful lot from you over the years. ’

‘ i thought you said you took care of this. ’

‘ she's not 'some girl', she's my fiancee. ’

‘ you and i are different. we're not better, we're not worse, we're just different. ’

‘ you and i are in love with entirely different people. ’

‘ you show up here and then you insult my friends, acting like you're better than them? ’

‘ what i need to know is if there is a place for me in your future. ’

‘ i was hoping to get an interview with you and your family, and maybe a few pictures, if you don't mind? ’

‘ oh, like you're going places... ’

‘ what are you doing with all that cash? why don't you invest it? ’

‘ when was the last time you pushed me around the dance floor? ’

‘ i think i had enough fun for one night. ’

‘ get out of here before you make me cry. ’

‘ don't get me started on the things that i don't understand. ’

‘ you can't believe everything you hear on tv. ’

‘ you owe me a dance. ’

‘ i'm happy in {location} but then i come down here and this fits too. ’

‘ oh, sweetie, you look tired. are you tired? ’

‘ i mean, how do you people live like this anyway? ’

‘ hold on, what are you doing with all that cash saved up? ’

‘ you are just like your father. ’

‘ no, not 'like old times', alright? times have changed. ’

‘ why didn't you tell me you came to {location}? ’

‘ all of a sudden i just... i needed a different life. ’

‘ this is one of those disasters waiting to happen. you know, one of those big ones that only cockroaches survive. ’

‘ look at you, always the belle of the ball. ’

‘ i didn't break in. i used a key, my key. ’

‘ did you know that there's a great, big world out there and it has absolutely nothing to do with marriage, or children, or... ’

‘ you ever wonder what would have happened if we hadn't gotten pregnant? ’

‘ i'll see you at the show. it's going to be great. ’

‘ he can give you a life that you and i only ever dreamed of and he adores you. ’

‘ there is a wedding in your future whether you like it or not. ’

‘ god, i can't wait to see the look on my mother's face... ’

‘ i hesitated long enough to realize that my head and my heart were saying two different things. ’

‘ look at you... you have a baby. in a bar. ’

‘ we were wondering when we were going to see you. ’

‘ you're doing the right thing. ’

‘ you shouldn't want to marry me. ’

‘ i love you, i love you, i love you... ’

‘ you're not doing anything illegal, are you, {name}? ’

‘ i don't know what else to say... but i'm sorry... ’

‘ oh god, what if they hate me? ’

‘ when everything went pear-shaped, you never left my side, and then i just left you. ’

‘ hell, i bet your folks don't even know you're in town. ’

‘ there's nothing i can do, the law is the law, and she has done nothing wrong. ’

‘ you are one hard woman to get in touch with. ’

‘ oh my god, you're engaged?! ’

‘ is that what you want? to be humiliated in front of all of your friends? ’

‘ i can't marry you. ’

‘ at least i'm doing something with my life. ’

‘ this is just as you described it. it must have been amazing, huh? growing up here? ’

‘ {name}? is that you? it's so late, are you alright? ’

‘ you can't just leave. ’

‘ holy shit, what happened to the stove? oh, and where are the magnets i had on the refrigerator? ’

‘ you know nothing about her. are you sure you even know who she is? ’

‘ one man for the rest of my life? i'd ball my eyes out. ’

‘ what the hell are you two trying to do? get yourselves killed? ’

‘ that accent of yours is a whole lot thicker when you're sleeping. ’

‘ i came out here to say thank you. ’

‘ what you are doing? ’  /  ‘ leaving. you've done it, you should recognize the gesture. ’

‘ you didn't need to call, just come by. ’

‘ why do i feel like i'm in the middle of times square buck naked? ’

‘ why would you want to marry me for anyhow? ’

‘ i thought you would be gone. ’

‘ i got to get home. my mom's going to kill me. ’

‘ i really don't care what happened... so you have a past. who doesn't? ’

‘ for somebody who's been holding onto something so hard, you're pretty quick to let it go. ’

‘ are you in town for awhile? ’

‘ i better back off. don't want to get you in trouble with the little lady. ’

‘ it's not like that. ’

‘ i, um... i tried to call you a couple of times... ’

‘ don't i get a smile? i know you got one in there somewhere. ’

‘ see, the truth is i gave my heart away a long time ago, my whole heart, and i never really got it back. ’

‘ i don't know who you are or what else you lied about... ’

‘ you don't remember me, do you? ’

‘ i guess i figured if i was pointing at you then nobody would see through me. ’

‘ what upsets me is that she lied to you. ’

‘ you've done real well for yourself. i'm proud of you, {name}. ’

‘ who could be calling at this hour? ’

‘ i would have come sooner if i'd known you were sick. ’

‘ i'm your friend and i have to read about it with twelve million other people! ’

‘ you two got a whole lot of catching up to do so i'm just going to leave you to it.’

‘ i just thought i'd surprise you.’

‘ this isn't who i am anymore. ’

‘ could we try to keep this as civilized as possible? ’

‘ nice to see you got your accent back. ’

‘ you're the first person i ever kissed, {name}, and i want you to be the last. ’

‘ maybe you and i had our chance. ’

‘ you can take the girl out of the honky-tonk but you can't take the honky-tonk out of the girl. ’

‘ i'll tell you what it's not like... it's not like they're the only one around here that you ran out on. ’

‘ at least i fight for what i want. ’

‘ you called the sherrif? you know that old bastard hates me! ’

‘ bring that pretty face over here and gimme a hug. ’

‘ i bet you sat there wondering what you did wrong. ’

‘ you looked like you were having fun out there tonight. ’

‘ you remember that vandalism incident out at the stockyard? totally her. ’

‘ did you cry? ’

‘ next time you lock somebody out, make sure they don't know where the spare key is hidden. ’

‘ don't even pretend you spent all this time missing me. ’

‘ what did i ever do to you? ’

‘ i've been planning this for weeks... ’

‘ at the risk of being rejected twice, i'm going to ask you again... will you marry me? ’

‘ you expect me to tell you you look good? what, did they run out of soap down at the piggly wiggly since i left? ’

‘ see, that's the thing. i'm not really a 'watch and see' kind of girl. ’

‘ 'no,' you won't answer or 'no,' you won't marry me? ’

‘ you know, i've really made something of myself, i have a career, people actually want to be me... and somebody loves me and i love them. ’

‘ i just think that you deserve better. that's all. ’

‘ you know, i've never actually understood that expression, but no i'm not 'shitting' you. ’

‘ i don't have a single childhood memory that doesn't have you in it. ’

‘ don't see the likes of you around these here parts much. ’

‘ so, have you made a decision? ’

‘ you get a second chance so please don't mess it up. ’

‘ i haven't seen my folks in years and i feel like this is something i should tell them in person. ’

‘ i don't ask you about your boyfriend. you keep your nose out of my life. deal? ’

‘ i am better than them! ’

‘ i'm sorry about what i said. i'm really sorry. ’

‘ since when does it have to be one or the other? you can have roots and wings. ’

‘ you don't want to marry me. ’

[askinkiskarma]

ok andra we need to talk ab this snow white remake.

i just cant with it like i already dont want to watch it

i think her name is rachel zegler but just from the interviews its already ruined it for me

like sure i guess its good that she isnt going to be saved by a man but like snow white is such an iconic timeless story. like idk if im right ab this but shes the first disney princess? i swear i read that somewhere and she said in an interview how snow white is outdated and thats why they changed the plotline but how can it be out dated when the majority of disney princess movies have that same story line. even the ones that were made recently like anna in frozen which wasnt that recent but in the last decade

like its reminding me of tthis tiktok i saw and it was ab taylor changing the lyrics to better than revengein fearless TV and the captions were something like “taylor sometimes we like a little misogyny. please change the lyrics back” (im still bitter about that lyric change 😤😤😤) but back to snow white… i want prince charming. and also the 7 dwarfs arent even inclusive to people with dwarfism. im so bitter.

but i loved the little mermaid

no cause it's honestly made my blood boil hhahaahahh. these people live under the impression that "feminism" is a one sided affair in which only the women that are "independent girl bosses" are worthy of being represented on film, and it is honestly sad and pathetic to watch unfold. it is such a detriment to allow ourselves to succumb to a 2 dimensional, restrictive, constricted version of ourselves, and to not allow little kids to believe or to ever want or strive for anything other than "the bag". BABE, THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH WANTING LOVE. there's nothing anti-feminist or weak about not being about that life. feminism is about choice, it's about allowing yourself to be the best and most authentic version of yourself. there is nothing authentic about yet ANOTHER movie about some surface level, shallow "strong" female character. they're all the same and they all SUCK - captain marvel, she-hulk, the new mulan, the new show white etc etc etc (notice the disney theme?)

in the wise words of meg march "just because my dreams are different than yours, doesn't mean they are unimportant."

[winterrhayle]

Ive been watching you and Bea go back and forth making each other rank Taylor albums and Im going to miss it SO MUCH Could you two rank the taylor swift tour videos please? I love looking at you guys' takes on things (even if yours are just complimenting every song and Bea is the one who knows how to actually criticise things 💀) love you guys <3 - an anonymous observer😉💗

TYSM :((((( SOBBING LY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! @deprivedmusicaljunkie look we've been percieved ! anon ur slight diss at me for not being able to criticise things is KILLING ME HAHAHHAHAHA (ur right though)

okayy heres my tour ranking (note that there isnt an official tour video for red OR eras so this probs affects my ranking,,, more for red than eras bc i see eras content every single day online anyway)

speak now world tour - okay i may be biased because this is my favourite album,, but even if it wasnt this would be her best tour (in my opinion),, i feel like in her old concerts she was so theatrical, and parts of it kinda looked like a full broadway production,, also the iconic elements like the lyrics on the arm, also shout out to the live album recording of this bc i listen to it soooo much and its amazing and perfect and show stopping etc etc im literally gonna list a bunch of iconic moments right here: THE HAUNTED BELL, the fireworks during dear john, the koi fish guitar with the light up tree, the gold fringe dress (DROP EVERYTHING NOW) the ballgown, just the wholle thing is the best thing i have ever seen

eras tour - this tour actually is killing me with all of the nostalgia watching her sing through and acknowledge all of her old albums and past selves (except debut, rip😔). and i especially love all of the details from past concerts she has (like the fearless spins, the sparkly & koi guitars, the over head hand heart) and also the new visuals for existing tours (like the old taylors in glass cages for rep) AND the visuals for the albums that hadnt been toured before (lover, folklore, evermore, midnights) i just think that she really did her albums justice (again, apart from debut☠️) and its insane that the show is so long 3+ hours

reputation stadium tour - karyn the snake is the coolest thing ive ever seen. also the ready for it intro with the hooded bodysuit outfit is ICONIC,,, i love the choreo on this tour, like the part of i did something bad where taylor gets lifted up like a cheerleader (AHHHHHH) and i love the quiet long live / new years day moment on the piano,, its so nice

the red tour - like i said before, there isnt a tour movie for this one so i dont know as much about it, but i loveeee how fun it is, i love the ringleader outift and circus theme for the closing song, we are never ever getting back toghether (my favourite part of the show) and i love the unnecessary hairflips during all too well😭

the 1989 world tour - this tour feels like her biggest one (even though it isnt), its like the most pop artist thing ever, its less theatre-production like than any of her other tours and it feels less personal? that being said its obviously very iconic, im forever obsessed with the wildest dreams/enchanted mashup, and that one out of the woods bodysuit that she only wore once for some reason, + the FOREVER iconic rock version of wanegbt BUT THE WAY THE TOUR MOVIE IS EDITED IS SOOOO ANNOYING LIKE IT SWITCHES TO A DIFFERENT PERSPECTIVE EVERY 2 SECONDS😭 anyway i really do appreciate this tour bc taylor really did give it everything she had, and looking at the miss americana documentary, u can tell it was really hard to have put on that show with what she was going through

fearless tour - this is ranked last but i actually really like this one, its cute. her vocals werent as good as they are currently but idc because this show was so funny,, it had the iconicccc throwing of the red chairs in forever & always and shoudlve said no in the rain!!!!!!!!

[tayfabe75]

I love your thoughtful opinions on things! It would be great to read some more of your thoughts. 

What do you think happened with the collab, do you think the reason was only because of the hate? And do you think they might release it anytime soon? I mean, it's no secret anymore that it exists, and now a lot of people really want to hear it, like there is the logic in just releasing it now.

And what do you think about Matty's verse? I read that people think his lyrics are terrible, but I really liked them, I think it matches the vibe of the song. And "then she called me a gentleman" will haunt me forever 😭

Sorry if this was too many questions 😅 these two just live rent free in my head 

Hi anon! Oh, trust me, these two live rent-free in my head, too. Or, perhaps I should say that the Fearless Love Gaze™ acted as an advance rent payment for some indefinite period. Probably a while. Also, never too many questions! I love answering questions.

When it comes to speculation, I live in a very weird nebulous state where I can see several different viable realities at once. Before I give my opinions I want to preface a little bit…

I don't base any of my opinions or speculation on gossip sites (including longtime assumptions regarding who this or that song is about - you'd be shocked easy many are to debunk, actually). I mostly speculate based on lyrics first and foremost, things that I can prove Taylor or Matty have said or done (with the understanding that they are also unreliable narrators when necessary, as 'Dear Reader' suggests). That said:

What I think happened with the collab:

My best "inside-the-box" guess about what happened with the collab was what I stated previously, but the "cliffs notes" version is that it seems most likely to me that Matty would have requested to pull the collaboration because of the hate campaign against him. As the lead singer of The 1975, he's something of a spearhead or mouthpiece for their band and tour, and dating Taylor put him at the center of our current cultural Panopticon. They might've broken up, gone on break, or distanced themselves from each other for optics.

However, I prefer my best "outside-the-box" guess: Taylor and Matty never broke up. They just want us to think that they did. In actuality, they are proud partners in crime currently writing their Kayfabian 'Love Story' (with the help of Brad Troemel and I would wager to guess, many others). They're pulling a Robbers-style heist on the media and celebrity culture as we know it, and they have us right where they want us: engaging in discourse about the collab.

What I think might happen with the collab:

If my first guess is accurate - Probably nothing will ever come of it. I personally hate this scenario, and not even because I don't get to hear the collab of my dreams, but because then it means the hate mob won. Taylor is about as close as Americans get to having royalty, and I guess that means she's what, beholden to medieval values of her many subjects (fans)? Look at how they rejoice in this strange cultural alliance with the NFL that came as a result of a 'betrothal' to the All-American football Prince. However, the video for Bejeweled mocks this idea. Alexa, play Lavender Haze!

The only kinda girl they see is a one night or a wife I'm damned if I do give a damn what people say. No deal, the 1950s shit they want from me

Meanwhile, Taylor has likened herself to Juliet since at least 2007/8. The entire point of writing 'Love Story' was to change the ending so Romeo and Juliet could be together.

In this scenario, we probably will get the collaboration! When? Whew, well…

Disclaimer: Wild speculation ahead!

As I've said, "Slut!" feels cyclical to me. In 2014, Taylor described herself as being a "lightning rod for slut-shaming" and she's been quoted as saying, "People often greatly underestimate how much I will inconvenience myself to prove a point." I get the sense that she could coax the world into slut-shaming her more overtly (just after they all streamed the hell out of "Slut!", how poetic that would be!), as right now the public is very interested in this whole "betrothal" storyline going on with a certain football star. The world, so it believes, took away her "bad bad boy shiny toy with a price" and if "Slut!" is any indication, she still wants it: "we'll pay the price, I guess"

That would be he perfect time to drop the rumored music video to accompany it (especially if say, they happen to have some kind of archival footage from 2014).

Again, this is all under the assumption that this is all an elaborate Kayfabian ruse. Let the fans choose her Kens and "play Barbies" until she burns down the dollhouse… While this sounds perhaps callous on its surface (especially for supporters of her current pairing) but… she already told us: This is why we can't have nice things.

But Mark my words: Taylor choosing Matty over a beloved "Chad" in such an overt way could be the catalyst for the cultural reset we desperately need. But that's a different tangent… back to "Slut!"

My thoughts on Matty's (alleged) verse:

I am going to take a wild guess and assume you saw people making fun of the lyrics on Twitter, aka the place where all benefit of the doubt goes to die. What people who simply read the lyrics and judge them to be "bad" are missing is… the melody! Matty's verse is longer than its replacement by one line, but you can kind of sing along with Taylor's second verse, let me try to help by putting them side-by-side with Taylor's lines:

Lights blink // Send the losing // code, he's my mind // waiting What // there we think // the sticks happens // and stones to rhyme // they throw I // Froze drink, drink // mid-air Fortune timing // Everyone's wants him Days shrink into long nights now // that was my crime (sing fast!) Plus 44 // the wrong place on an American phone // at the right time Cat eye // and I running down // break down her cheekbone // then he's But it's elegant // pullin' me in (sing fast!) I tell her, "You are not a slut, // in a world of boys You're just relevant" // he's a gentleman

It's also hard to judge the lyrics without hearing how Matty would sing them, right? Like go ahead and make fun of the 'relevant' line if you must, but I bet his inflection is what makes it.

So, are the lyrics "good"? Well, here's what I will say: it's much easier to criticize someone else's art than to share your own. Regardless of whether or not Matty did pen these lines, gotta admit, I like them (especially correctly paired with the melody). They seem specific to the point that they are likely inside jokes that only Tatty would fully understand, particularly the word most often criticized: "relevant", which I think Matty gave a clever nod to on Chicken Shop Date.

Apart from that, these 'new' lyrics feel Tatty-coded in that they might be self-referential. Considering most people still don't believe 'About You' is actually about Taylor (despite Matty heavily insinuating that it is on multiple occasions, for instance: 1, 2, 3), I won't even bother going into possible parallels…

Anyway, even before the alleged "leak", I felt quite confident that this song was about him (and that The 1975 were always meant to feature on 1989). The "leak" did nothing but validate my suspicions.

[escapadeist]

heres some questions! what (and WHY) are your fav red tv songs? DID U see those clue compilation videos that say speak now is next? do u think SOFT ts era will come back? lastly are you BLOCKing the tumblr bots or just ignoring them (unlike ME)

So this is just a regular update ask. It's one of those.

1. My favourites on Red TV are -

Forever Winter - the theme of suicide and someone being so close to their breaking point, and u not knowing what to do other than love them when they can't love themselves, it just spoke to me. I have been difficult to love, still am *cool gal finger guns* so ik how it must be on the receiving end of it. Also, reminded me of this other very famous song called How To Save A Life by The Fray

Better Man - Have always loved it, heard it back when it was sung by Little Big Town, then heard the Bluebird cafe version where Taylor sang it live for the first time (fuck Scott Borschetta for ruining that video with his "commentary") and then ofcourse this Red Tv version just blew me away. Again, the idea of leaving because something got so beyond toxic, for your own sake, is something i relate to, all too well.. Plus, u should really watch the Little Big Town mv, it has got some pleasing visuals.

and ofcourse All Too Well 10 Min version (yay for the grammy win!)... What do i say about this song that's already not been said? I loved the choice of actors for the short film, Sadie is such a sweetheart and Dylan was and still is very mmm... I think this being her intro to proper directing will eventually lead us to some even more beautiful adventures. She has always been a storyteller, right from Speak Now World Tour cinematics, to Fearless' Love Story to 1989's Wildest Dreams. I just love how she can single-handedly create this entire universe of a myriad of niche storylines that are like a secret between her and her fans. All Too Well was my fav ever since i first heard it, albeit that was quite late.. but oh well... I guess time wouldn't fly and I stood there just paralysed by it.

2. Which clue compilation vids? I just saw the hints and easter eggs related to all the mvs of Midnights. Lavender Haze has some clues as well, and so did Bejeweled.

3. By Soft TS era if u mean her Folklore Evermore style, I certainly hope so. I loved those styles. Although i highly doubt it. She's prepping for the gianormous Eras tour right now, so i highly doubt any other styles will be seen. Although she's staying true to Midnights era, if her Grammy's dress is any indication. (Hey, isn't it cool the dress icon 👗 is the same colour as her outfit?)

4. Ignored the first few. Noticed that post-blocking, they have now reduced in number. Although i believe they can read this so egffhhjikrsssfgg... (IYKWIM ;)) n i knew you wouldn't block em. I think you're the one spawning them, aren't u? They are your mini-Satans, admit it!

[galindathrop]

Eras Tour Setlist and Surprise Songs (as of May 5, 2023)

I figured with this weekend being Nashville I should update this month old post. 

Taylor Swift

Tim McGraw - March 17

Picture to Burn

Teardrops on My Guitar

A Place in this World - April 22

Cold as You - April 23

The Outside

Tied Together with a Smile

Stay Beautiful

Should’ve Said No

Mary’s Song

Our Song - March 24

I’m Only Me When I’m with You

Invisible

A Perfectly Good Heart

Fearless (Taylor’s Version)

Fearless

Fifteen

Love Story

Hey Stephen

White Horse -  March 25

You Belong With Me

Breathe (feat. Colbie Callait)

Tell Me Why

You’re Not Sorry - April 21

The Way I Loved You

Forever & Always

The Best Day

Change

Jump Then Fall - April 2

Untouchable

Forever & Always (Piano Version)

Come In with the Rain

Superstar

The Other Side of the Door - April 28

Today Was a Fairytale - April 22

You All Over Me (feat. Maureen Morris)

Mr. Perfectly Fine

We Were Happy

That’s When (feat. Keith Urban)

Don’t You

Bye Bye Baby

Speak Now

Mine

Sparks Fly

Back to December

Speak Now - April 13

Dear John

Mean - April 15

The Story of Us

Never Grow Up

Enchanted

Better than Revenge

Innocent

Haunted

Last Kiss

Long Live

Ours - March 31

If This Was a Movie

Superman

Red (Taylor’s Version)

State of Grace - March 18

Red

Treacherous - April 13

I Knew You Were Trouble

22

I Almost Do

We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together

Stay Stay Stay

The Last Time (featuring Gary Lightbody of Snow Patrol)

Holy Ground

Sad Beautiful Tragic - March 31

The Lucky One - April 2

Everything Has Changed (featuring Ed Sheeran)

Starlight

Begin Again - April 23

The Moment I Knew

Come Back… Be Here

Girl at Home

Ronan

Better Man

Nothing New (featuring Phoebe Bridgers)

Babe

Message in a Bottle

I Bet You Think About Me (featuring Chris Stapleton) - April 30

Forever Winter

Run (featuring Ed Sheeran)

The Very First Night

All Too Well (10 Minute Version)

1989

Welcome to New York

Blank Space

Style

Out of the Woods

All You Had to Do Was Stay

Shake It Off

I Wish You Would

Bad Blood

Wildest Dreams

How You Get the Girl - April 30

This Love

I Know Places

Clean - April 1

Wonderland - April 21

You Are in Love

New Romantics

Reputation

…Ready for It?

End Game (featuring Ed Sheeran and Future)

I Did Something Bad

Don’t Blame Me

Delicate

Look What You Made Me Do

So It Goes…

Gorgeous - April 29

Getaway Car

King of My Heart

Dancing with Our Hands Tied

Dress

This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things

Call It What You Want

New Year’s Day

Lover

Forgot That You Existed

Cruel Summer

Lover

The Man

The Archer

I Think He Knows

Miss Americana & the Heartbreak Prince

Paper Rings

Cornelia Street

Death by a Thousand Cuts - April 1

London Boy

Soon You’ll Get Better (featuring The Chicks)

False God

You Need to Calm Down

Afterglow

Me! (feat. Brendon Urie of Panic! at the Disco)

It’s Nice to Have a Friend

Daylight

Folklore

The 1 (era opener as of 3/31)

Cardigan

The Last Great American Dynasty

Exile (featuring Bon Iver)

My Tears Ricochet

Mirrorball - March 17

Seven (spoken)

August

This Is Me Trying - March 18

Illicit Affairs

Invisible String

Mad Woman - April 15

Epiphany

Betty

Peace

Hoax

The Lakes

Evermore

Willow

Champagne Problems

Gold Rush

‘Tis the Damn Season

Tolerate It

No Body, No Crime (feat. Haim)

Happiness

Dorothea

Coney Island (feat. the National) - April 28

Ivy

Cowboy Like Me - March 25 (with special guest Marcus Mumford)

Long Story Short

Marjorie

Closure

Evermore (feat. Bon Iver)

Right Where You Left Me

It’s Time to Go

Midnights

Lavender Haze

Maroon

Anti-Hero

Snow on the Beach (feat. Lana Del Rey) - March 24

You’re on Your Own, Kid - April 14

Midnight Rain

Question…?

Vigilante Shit

Bejeweled

Labyrinth

Karma

Sweet Nothing

Mastermind

The Great War - April 14

Bigger Than the Whole Sky

Paris

High Infidelity - April 29

Glitch

Would’ve, Could’ve, Should’ve

Dear Reader

Hits Different

[noro-noro-noro]

had neat dreams but literally only remember some parts

1. i’m a serial killer & this girl who has a crush on me is tracking me down 2. 3 heavenly sisters vs the tower of hell  3. cyborg me eats a bomb at the president’s children’s soccer game

- there was some blond girl hunting down a serial killer whose tag was The Wolf. she was in every online forum & stuff but she kept her identity well hidden. fortunately as the omniescent god of all my dreams, I can sometimes bend reality to my will so I knew her :)

- there was also a girl who looked like roxanne Ritchie from megamind who waa also somehow involved? the dream's c plot or something idk it kept cutting back to her arguing with her ex boyfriend bc it was a breakup on mediocre terms & they both kinda wanted to get back together but they were too proud. I remember she specifically mocked something he said.

- anyway with my omniescent dream powers I realized that girl wasn't some kind of junior vigilante she just had a huge crush on the wolf. good for me :) so when I saw someone offering to meet her in the front of my friend's boyfriend's new job place (a combination bubble tea and clothing store that he lived in the back of) I decided to kill that second person and meet her instead. the second person was always carrying around a little cloth lacy umbrella as an accessory. it was cute so I took it.

- anyway I saw her immediately & came up behind her & said "so you're the little cutie that's been looking for me" & cornered her in the store. she looked really 😳😳 about it, but she was also carrying a gun. I thought it would be easy to hit the gun out of her holster before she could react bc I wanted to keep teasing her , but my friend's bf came over bc he thought I was being threatened by some weirdo with a gun. appreciated that. we all ended up getting bubble tea. i jokes about poisoning hers & she went 😳😳😳 again. girl stop idolizing serial killers lol

next

- from heaven ? or some other sacred place there are 3 sisters & also some generals. we are going to be under attack soon. we're in a place thate above some clouds. unknown to everyone else the middle sister is in constant close contact with Real Mother, who has her own schemes. through the power of real mother middle sister is able to do weird shit, like las time we sent our forces to combst the hellish tower as soon as she had line of sight with the enemy she teleported into his body & did something & he was fuckinf gone except for his eyeballs, which she walked out of the tower holding.

- the younger sister's mortal vessel had been killed last time so she was in a child's body. the older sister was strong & beautiful & fearless! I was from her pov for a bit. the clouds were swallowing up our corner of the world, but I walked through sum to find a spot on the hill to stand in the sun. and then I saw the youngest sister falling from the zip line so I launched myself like a bullet to catch her.

- the middle sister was like "we will need to kill the newest hellish warlord again, but you said it was through the fleetfooted mount of my youngest sister you were able to do that?" the youngest sister rode a golden pegasus. his name was Percy. he was killed by the middle sister for overwhelming loyalty not to Real Mother but to his owner. her new mount was just something else idk

- anyway the hellish tower looked like it was in minecraft. the walls were impenetrable. the front doors were not. however the hellish warlord liked to pour lava down from the top to scorch our forces and trap them until we were all cooked, and there was no other way in. pain in the ass.

next

- I was some kind of cyborg dude that looked like sin kiske at some little league baseball or soccer game. people in the audience just wanted to have sex with each other though, except for a couple peolle who were trying to sabotage the game and actually blow the children up. I became aware of this but the perps were trying to herd everyone somewhere else by leaking a live feed of some cage of raccoons blowing up but the cage in the footage was upside down & nobody was listenikg to me. I stayed in the bleachers. there was an enemy guy with like....a smug evil anime prettyboy type of face. he had a face that would be stylized in fanart as>:-} . he looked like if shu yamino was evil and goth and had a lame haircut with long front bangs and also was part cyborg and had one black wing. like okay. his name started with a P. anyway he was acting in somebody's orders and he airdropped a bomb in but I shot it! but there was another bomb.?

- the two bombs were rolling around and the kids didn't understand what was going on yet so they were kicking one around like a soccer ball while the principals tried to stop it . when P tried to detonate it aftee having his other men tackle me to the ground & beat me up a little, nothing happened. i put up a good fight! me & his two favorite henchmen were all pinned down by some.metal net bc I'd dragged them down with me. unfortunately I was now malfunctioning as well due to sustaining heavy damage to my internal parts.

- antway I realized - when I shot at the thing I'd missed due to the original owner's proframminf of this genre of rctboeg would never make a mistake. so then I'd caught the bomb and put it inside of my head bc at least I'd be able to run away, but then forgot due to being beat the fuck up. I started laughing and then the bomb fell out of my head and then I stopped laughing and swallowed it. it was a small purple cube not round at all . I was like "dude! P! you're a fucking moron! wanna see something funny?" & P turned around all red in the face from fucking this job up and looking bad to his boss. then my alarm went off and I woke up and I was a little disappointed since I wanted to know what robo me's plan was