#and remote work is hard to find and even harder to find something that lasts longer than a few months

[serendipitous-mage]

it's taken me so long to find another job despite having a degree and some decent experience under my belt (and applying to things i Know are at/below my pay range/experience level to up chances of finding anything), looking at the estimated amounts of upcoming taxes and what i'll be making (it's a temporary gig) and assuming i am unlucky in the amount i'll owe the irs which i always am: i will make maybe a whole $1000 more than what i'll need for taxes

and then its right back to the application hellzone again :'D

[heavenbarnes]

I wanna make it (so badly)

Art Donaldson x Fem Reader

Warnings/Contains: reader is AFAB with she/her pronouns, swearing, inappropriate employer/employee relationship, dry-humping, a lot of heavy petting, implied age gap, effective-infidelity (reader tested, tashi approved), oral sex (f!receiving), art is a bit of a pervert and mega-pathetic (endearing), references to religion (worship).

Word Count: 5.8k

i white knuckled the steering wheel on the way home from this film thinking about art donaldson- this is, essentially, an ode to that

Youth tennis lessons, $20/h, call for details

Finding work was hard, keeping work was harder.

Cleaning, baby-sitting, pet-sitting, pet-walking. There was virtually nothing you hadn't tried.

Odd jobs, odd hours, and the occasional odd employer.

You'd played tennis for the last couple years of college. Nothing remotely competitive but you and your friends had looked cute in the skirts and they'd give you whole hours out of class to play.

You were above average with a good arm and better patience.

Another odd job to add to your growing list.

You'd been particular about where you'd posted the ads, the neighbourhoods you'd chosen. Only the ones with manicured lawns and white picket fences.

Tacking the paper to boards in upmarket cafes, fancy supermarkets, ladies-only gyms.

The kind of people that want their kids playing tennis and could find their way to increase your pay- if you did well.

You always did very well.

So your little car looked a little out of place in this neighbourhood, fingers holding the scribbled post-it note with the address. Your scrawling handwriting detailing the "Donaldson's" were enquiring within.

Pulling up outside the house, you had a quiet inkling that you might've been out of your depth. Whoever owned this house deserved more than an above-average-ex-college-student that only learnt the sport to spend time with friends.

But they'd requested you, you'd have to let them come to that conclusion on your own.

Your knuckles only hit the door once before it was being swung open by someone that looked destined to be a security guard, like he'd come out the womb with his future decided.

What the fuck had you gotten yourself into?

He'd left you in the "formal lounge" to sit smack-bang in the centre of a couch that wouldn't even fit in the lobby of your apartment building- let alone the apartment itself.

As you admired a painting on the wall that you'd only ever seen in books, high heels on the stone floors made you jump in your seat.

The most beautiful woman you might ever see in your life appeared before you and said your name in a way that had you standing from your seat.

Your face faltered just enough that you hoped she didn't notice. There was something about her that told you she noticed everything.

Fuck me, that's Tashi Duncan.

If you know a thing about tennis (or even just watched the news) you know exactly who this woman is. You remember her more from your childhood but you remember her all the same.

The woman that once held the world by the balls.

She apologised for her husband's absence, that he was busy. It wasn't lost on you that the "husband" she casually referred to was Art Donaldson, US Open champion.

The Donaldson's.

Ah fuck.

Tashi went on the explain that they were wanting to begin lessons for their daughter Lily. You assumed this was the one you could hear running circles around the informal lounge.

"With all due respect, am I not the least qualified person in this home for that?"

You watched a perfectly formed cheekbone lift in what was nearly a smile. Strangely enough, something in the pit of your chest was dying to make her do that again.

There was something about her that demanded to be impressed.

You were no exception to the rule.

"My husband and I have seen some of your matches, we liked what we saw."

How? Your 'matches'- if you can even call them that, were nothing of note. You don't even think faculty bothered to watch them. You weren't quite sure why they'd even recorded them.

A silly part of you began to wonder how they'd even got a hold of them- until you remembered who they were.

The Hermes and Peitho of tennis.

"You did? I always thought of myself as more of a casual player."

"And that's what we liked, we know better than anyone how brutal tennis can become. We want someone to help Lily enjoy the game."

Oh, okay then.

You'd made a quasi-college-career out of purely enjoying the game. You were sure you could foster the same spirit for the six-year-old performing the entire 'Encanto' soundtrack in the other room.

Tashi laid down a tight schedule, Monday to Friday, 3pm to 6pm. You would teach Lily the wonders of the game on the court behind their home.

Their home you'd come to find out was a luxury rental when you'd complemented Tashi on another of the art pieces that'd apparently come with the place.

You'd also come to find out they typically live in hotel rooms, but they'd settled in this area for the time being as Art had a good thing going with a regular playing schedule and a sporting-goods deal.

You nodded along like you could begin to understand a life like that.

As she showed you back to your car (the one you suddenly felt humiliated for her to see you own), she called your name one last time from the doorway.

"You undersell yourself, we'll give you eighty an hour."

She left you choking on your tongue with one foot in the car and the other on an Italian cobblestone.

You were never going to walk or sit another dog again.

Lily was going to win her first Grand Slam by ten if that's what they'd pay you.

As your peeled your car from their turn-around area, you watched a Jeep Wrangler slow as it passed you. You couldn't see through the tint but you just knew it was him.

And you knew he was watching you.

-

The minute you'd told your roommate the situation you'd come into, she'd called bullshit.

A few texts from Tashi's now saved icon and a weird little photo you'd taken from inside the guest bathroom, it'd been enough to convince her.

"Fucking hell, are you God's favourite or something?"

You'd argue you were quite the opposite, she of all people should know. She'd seen some of the states you'd come home in after your other random jobs.

Felt good to be the winner.

Even just once.

In the air of some girlish fascination, she brought up a Youtube video of "Tashi Duncan Career Highlights" courtesy of "tennisguy779."

You'd protested it, rolling your eyes while feigning disinterest. No use, the minute you caught her out the corner of your eye- you were captivated.

It was entirely possible to imagine she hovered above the court, like there was a greater force placing her exactly where she needed to be, exactly when she needed.

It was even easier to believe she was just that good.

As you watched her play, listened to the sounds the game could draw from her- you wondered if this was how she and Art had felt.

Had they curled up in their informal lounge like you were right now? Had Tashi studied your every move meticulously like you assume? Had Art passed comment on your form? Did he think you were any good?

Tennisguy779's lineup changed quickly to "Art Donaldson Career Highlights" and you felt your chest constrict. An inexplicable feeling washed over you.

Like you'd been caught with God's forbidden fruit.

Your roommate had tried to question why you'd effectively flown off the couch, only to be met with a muttered 'goodnight' as you shut the bedroom door behind you.

Thin walls meant you drifted off to sleep that night with the rhythmic sounds of Art, grunting his way through an ATP Challenger.

It was no surprise you dreamt of him.

-

The Donaldson's tennis court was down a steep set of stairs, set back into an oasis of lush greenery.

Perfect for a 6-year-old's first lessons.

You didn't know if it was the grand balcony that overlooked the court or the fact a well-manicured Tashi stood atop it, but you felt positively observed.

Lily was in the midst of showing you how she could do a cartwheel (she couldn't) when the voice in the back of your head started echoing a promise of $80/h.

"Alright, lets channel some of that into your elbow."

Give a six-year-old a racquet half the size of her and she's going to blow effective chunks, but at least she has the spirit. Maybe it's her energy, maybe it has been a while since you've been on the court-

The kid's running you ragged.

Coupled with her height, you're spending more time bent over than you are up straight and it's all going to your head. All you can hope is Tashi isn't up there watching you stumble after the ball.

But you're sure there are eyes on your back.

Lily is a quick learner and you work out a tradeoff of one tennis skill for one spinning heel kick (mandatory that you watch).

Roll on 6pm and she's dog-tired, however, she's managed to hit the ball at least twice. Surely that's earned your keep. She lays star-fished on the turf and murmurs something about a piggyback.

You know you're about to earn your keep.

By the top of the staircase, you're more than happy to hand over a Lily-shaped-sack-of-potatoes to Tashi's mother. As you emerge from behind an ornate gargoyle, your suspicions proved correct.

Art Donaldson had been watching your every move.

Left alone on the balcony with him, you're acutely aware of the fact he's standing between you and your exit, and he's just had a full show of you bent over and flitting about his tennis court.

That and you still haven't said so much as 'hello' to the man.

You dwell on it for a moment and then there's that feeling back in the pit of your stomach, like any minute you'll be caught with fruit in hand- in throat.

The Original Sin.

Luckily, Art made the decision for you, crossing the space to shake your hand. If he noticed the way your hand trembled, he didn't seem to mind.

"It's nice to finally meet you."

You wished you had more to say to him, or maybe something more intelligent. Something better than a quiet "and you."

He was the better conversationalist, thankfully. Head motioning to the court, he looked down his nose at you when he spoke.

It should've felt condescending. It didn't.

"How did she go out there?"

"Yeah, really good- not a Disney character I can't name now."

He laughed.

Really laughed, like the joke was better than it was.

Like there was a preening little flutter inside you that said "do it again!"

You shrugged your shoulders like making him happy came naturally as you squinted up at him, as if he was the sun.

"You were watching? You must've seen her picking it up?"

Because he was the expert. Because he is the champion.

He hummed as he nodded, eyes skywards like there might've been something more important behind the clouds.

"Must've been distracted."

Within an instant- his eyes flickered to your own and you were sure he watched them change. He must've seen something he liked, the corner of his lip quirked up before he spoke again.

"Come on, I'll sort your payment and then we'll let you get home."

And for whatever reason, his hand fit perfectly in the small of your back as he lead you inside.

-

And how quickly did you become a strange piece of furniture in the Donaldson's home- in their life?

An ottoman for Tashi to rest her tired feet on.

An abstract piece on the wall for Art to admire when he passes it.

A projection of constellations across the ceiling to keep Lily bright behind the eyes.

At least you belonged- there was no doubt that this was where you belonged.

That wasn't to say your tennis skill had improved any, lesson after lesson you still couldn't wrap your head around why they'd even signed you on, let alone kept you.

"Ok, don't watch that one either- maybe just do what I say and not what I do."

You hadn't nailed a single one, at this point you couldn't blame Lily for skipping around pretending her racquet was a horse.

Wasn't like she'd be learning anything if she was paying attention.

"Ok, here we go just- ok right, when your parents ask how today went, please be kind."

"Your elbow is too low."

It was a miracle you didn't scream.

Art entered the court with a swagger that you could only assume struck fear when he was your opponent.

Right now it struck pure embarrassment and Lily wasn't helping.

"Daddy, she didn't hit a single one!"

"Alright, I don't think daddy needs to know that-"

"Daddy knows, daddy's been watching."

Daddy really needs to stop calling himself that.

Lily and her racquet took off for another tour of The Grand National as Art approached you with quiet determination.

It was like waiting for impact, his eyes never wavered off his daughter as he made towards you. At the last moment, he snapped his attention in your direction- with a smile that should've felt condescending.

It wasn't.

"If your elbow is too low you lose topspin and power."

If you deserved the $80/h you were earning, you might've known that.

As Art stepped up to you, the turn of the planets on their axis slowed down and it could've been entirely possible to believe it was only you two.

And Lily upon her trusty steed.

The gallops of her tennis shoes thinned out as Art placed one hand around your elbow, lifting it higher. His other hand held your waist as he pulled your back flush to his chest.

"Lily, go find grandma."

Then it really was just you two.

Your heart hammered against the shell of your ribcage, blood rushing around your ears as you felt Art's chin perch at your shoulder.

"If your elbow is high enough," His hand lifted it up and you let it stay there. "And your hip is turned."

He didn't have to say it with the gravel in his voice, but he did. He didn't have to hold your hips as he moved them, but he did. He didn't have to stay without so much of an inch between the two of you, but he did.

With one hand in the curve of your waist, he tossed the ball into the air with the other- then he whistled.

Like the obedient thing you didn't know you were, you raised the racquet and sent the ball flying through the air without even blinking.

As the streak of green hit the court and rolled away, you found yourself lying in wait, as if you were waiting for something- your next command?

"Good girl."

There it was.

Under the all consuming effect that Art Donaldson just seemed to have on people, you'd entirely forgotten you were in a position you could be 'caught' in. By his all consuming wife, of all people.

So, you should've moved.

Quite honestly you should've straightened up and cleared your throat and thanked him and told him it was time for you to go home.

You should've moved.

But Art wasn't moving. If anything he was staying purposefully still at your backside.

Obedient thing you seem to be.

"Show me that again?"

So,

You teach Lily the bare basics of tennis for three hours and receive $80 on the hour.

Then Art spends three hours of his spare time teaching you to perfect your swing- in a way that couldn't ever vaguely resemble professional.

A simple transactional arrangement.

Your tennis improves on a slow but sure basis and he gets the most off-court action he's seen since college.

Even if it is just heavy petting on astro-turf.

A hand under the hem of a tennis skirt. A pressing hip against your own. A deep breath as your hair brushes past him.

You figure Art will take what he can get.

And it's never enough to raise alarm. Sure, there's that fluttering in your chest that warns you might get 'caught' but you're never quite sure what one might 'catch' if they found you out.

It's undoubted who that 'one' is though.

The one who holds the cards- holds the throat, maybe.

Tashi, who's presence precedes her perhaps more than her reputation. Even when she isn't there, she's there.

So, when Art's hand lingers too long on the outside of your thigh and you think you can feel it verging into the territory that'll change everything- it's Tashi on your mind.

You're beginning to think your conscience sounds a lot like Tashi.

-

Who are you if not obedient to the Donaldson's?

Chasing Lily around a court.

Adhering to Tashi's every request.

Being Art's fantasy.

Being Art's.

Most of the time, anyway. Three hours a week.

Something to keep him bright behind the eyes, maybe. Something to keep him happy. Something to keep him-

Winning?

He tells you he plays better with you around. The way he says it makes you giggle, a girlish little noise that sort of just slips out. He serves the ball with his eyes on you and, sure enough, it lands smack where he wanted it too.

Everything where he wants it. When he wants it.

Shy and inconsequential touches and glances shared just between you.

Until, well- until they weren't.

"Would you like a coffee?"

Tashi's mother had taken Lily off to bed, leaving you and Art separated by an island. Kitchen island.

He braced both palms against it as he watched you watch the door, wondering if you should cut and run, wondering if someone else might come through it.

Talking yourself out of it. Whatever it might be.

"Yes please."

Even he looked surprised, brows raising an inch as he turned to the Nespresso machine. You took the moment to watch his back, the muscles moving under the cool-dry fabric of his shirt.

You spent all your time pretending not to notice him that actually allowing yourself the chance to study him made you lightheaded.

Had he always looked this captivating?

He broke your focus with a coffee cup, sliding it towards you as he rounded the bench. His eyes didn't even waver off you as he took a sip of his own.

It wasn't lost on you that he managed to tongue foam off the tip of his nose.

This was the longest you'd stuck around after a tennis lesson, longest you'd allowed yourself to be in his presence. You weren't quite sure how big this thing could get.

Your mouth was opening before your brain had decided it was a good idea.

"Mr. Donaldson-"

"Art."

"Uh, Art- I really appreciate the help you've been giving me- uh, you know- with tennis."

He placed his coffee mug down, nodding as he did it. "My pleasure."

Naturally.

That brain of yours was still firing off at a mile a minute. There was a very tiny voice right at the back that said it was up to you how this night would end- you had a choice to make.

Placing your coffee mug beside his, you scanned his face to find him already looking at you. Perhaps the choice was already set.

Maybe it was fate.

All he said was your name, it could've been the way he said it- but your whole body was losing the rigidity it'd formed when he first asked you to stay longer. When he'd made the choice.

Crossing the small gap between you two, Art was careful to keep one hand on the kitchen bench as the other hovered beside you. Not touching you,

Yet.

One step closer and the tip of Art's nose was touching yours. You think you might've been able to smell the coffee off his breath.

It thinned out- leaving you with his sweat. Musk. Art.

A sudden surge of morals overcame you, your voice broke out as a gasp.

"What about Mrs. Donaldson?"

"Actually, it's still Duncan."

You screamed.

Right in his face.

Tashi's voice made you jump out of your skin.

However, Art didn't move. As you turned your head to gauge the way his wife stalked across the kitchen, you felt his nose brush against your cheek.

Tashi retrieved a tall bottle of Pellegrino from the fridge, taking a poignant sip as her eyes flitted between the two of you.

What a fucking sight.

Her husband, eyes shut and face pressed pathetically to their daughter's tennis instructor- his hands itching to close around your waist.

You, young and bleary eyed looking utterly caught. Staring up at her like she might decide your fate.

It took all your strength to find your words.

"I’m not here to teach tennis, am I?”

“No, of course not. You’re frankly terrible at tennis.”

There's the Tashi you were expecting.

Her words should've stung, but they didn't. They couldn't, not when her husband was laying his hands against your back and rubbing soothing circles down the length of your spine.

Not when his lips were mouthing wet kisses along your cheek.

Not when she was right. Spade's a spade.

"Why am I here?"

She snorted, a real dissatisfactory sound- like she hoped you were smarter than that. She was halfway to her bedroom before she cut you loose.

"Careful, he makes that sound before he cums."

-

And he had, just like she'd said.

Art had cum in his shorts, pressed up against your thigh with his face still smushed against your own.

And you'd taken it, obedience in spades.

You'd stood there and let him hump your leg like a bad dog and you'd even pat his head and whispered kind words in his ear after the mess he'd made.

Then you slipped out the front door to your car and you'd pretended not to notice that there were two bedroom lights on upstairs.

You hadn't even divulged the freaky details to your roommate when you got home.

But the showerhead knew all about them.

Visions of Art on the clouds of steam- replayed in your head the sounds he'd made right in your ear.

How he'd whimpered your name when he splashed his boxers like a fucking teenager.

It was no surprise you dreamt of him.

You even showed up next day, valiantly. You didn't run for the hills or even straight to a tabloid about how weird the Donaldson's really were.

And maybe that's why you hadn't told your roommate either.

Because telling someone what Tashi allowed? What Art liked?

That'd mean you'd have to admit your dirty little secret.

You loved it.

When you showed up, something was different. No usual chatter in the house, no shoes by the front door. You checked out the front window to see what you'd missed when you arrived.

Tashi's car was gone.

"She's taken her mom and Lily to the ballet."

At least you didn't scream this time.

You were lucky your back was to him, lest he see the self-righteous little smile that broke when the words settled.

"Oh, ok."

"I'll see you on the court."

Oh, ok.

Lest he see the disappointment that took over.

Following him close behind, you didn't know why you were effectively surprised that he still wanted to continue with your lessons. You'd half expected- hoped, he'd bend you over the kitchen island.

Tennis was fun too, you guess.

Thinking about it, something that bold didn't seem the style of the man who'd nearly blacked out rubbing up on you. Beckoning you onto the tennis court with two fingers and a wry smile did, however.

You fell into your usual position, hip turned and elbow curved on your side of the court. You waited for him to appear behind you, chest melding into the curve of your back.

It never came.

Art took long strides towards the net, vaulting it in one smooth motion. He ended up parallel to you, waiting with a ball and racquet in either hand.

The smile had left his face, a rather blank expression taking over as he sized you up. And there was that fear- knowing what it felt like to be on the wrong side of him.

This was going to hurt.

From the moment he pressed the ball to the neck of his racquet, it was all over. Your feet were never in one place for more than a second, your arms burned above you, your head permanently on a swivel.

Art didn't look like he'd broken more than a sweat.

You knew he had, you could see it in the neck of his shirt. But he didn't look it.

He looked calm, he looked in control, he looked-

Like he was enjoying himself.

For every rally that you managed, you thought you saw an inkling of pride set in his features.

For every serve that you missed, you knew you saw unbridled lust.

Not a point scored in your favour, you hit the ball towards him one last time before you collapsed to the turf. Flat on your back, reminiscent of your first lesson here.

You watched the clouds shift over your head, listening to your pulse thick and fast in your ears. Just underneath it, you could hear footfalls approaching.

No hurry, but impending.

Soon, the sun above you was eclipsed by Art Donaldson. His golden hair shone with the halo of light behind it.

Now this was God's favourite.

"You can't be giving up this easily?"

Forcing a laugh, you threw your arm up and over your eyes. "Wanna bet?"

Turns out he did- turns out Art struggled to do anything but win.

Somehow, you found it within yourself to stand back up. This time it was only a practice, you weren't brave enough to face off against him another round.

This was more your speed.

The hand that wasn't holding your elbow was curving around your front, the pleats of your tennis skirt lifting over his fingers. You felt a warm hand slowly moving across the front of your underwear.

Two fingers migrated south, pressing against the seam of you- he must've felt the pure heat radiating beneath his fingertips.

Turning your head even an inch, you found the curve of his nose pressing into your cheek.

"I didn't give up."

He hummed, the vibration rolled across your shoulders.

"Mmm, you didn't."

The hand sans-racquet dropped between your thighs to press his palm into your cunt. It was Art who flexed your fingers and cupped it.

"Where's my prize?"

There was no trophy, no podium, no medal.

But there was Art between your legs, slinging a knee over each shoulder like he might've been the real winner.

You'd never been inside the 'changing shed' behind the court, of course it was nicer than your actual home.

Your head made contact with the hard wood behind you, bench digging into your ass as you felt a hot mouth moving against the seat of your underwear.

Running your fingers through his hair, your gripped the ends of it- tugging him closer until you felt the flat of his tongue through the thin fabric.

Needy fingers tugged the ruined garment down your thighs, tucking him into the pocket of his shorts. You knew all too well that you'd never see them again.

You were sure Art would be seeing a lot of them.

His tongue ran up the split, one long stroke before you felt the curve of his nose press to your clit. The ridge of it moved as his tongue retreated back to your entrance.

With everything he had.

Your eyes had been rolling back in your head as you arched your back, the moment you were able to find a semblance of control- your gaze fell before you.

Naturally, Art was already looking up at you. Two hands splayed across each side of your hips as he pulled back to wrap his lips around your clit.

You couldn't help the hazy little smile on your face as you watched his eyes.

Utterly devotional.

The more you tugged on his hair, the hungrier he seemed. Pulling from the root seemed to spur him on, seemed to tell him 'good job' and he was responsive.

His tongue flicked beneath your clit, pressing it to his upper lip as he brought two fingers to your entrance. He stroked a couple times, making your hips twitch against him, before he sunk in to the last knuckle.

Turns out Art had a style about him. One he brought to the tennis court and, seemingly, to the floor of his changing shed.

The style was calculated.

Every move he made was engineered to get something out of you- a reaction, a whimper, a twitch. He was doing what he did best.

Playing a game.

Art struggled to do anything but win.

"Fuck- Mr. Donaldson."

"Art."

Even muffled against your cunt, you were good at following his orders. Even more so when he was the decider of your imminent orgasm.

You threaded your fingers in the sides of his hair, pulling his face flush against you so you could ride his mouth. Taking every last thing from him you could.

It drew the most pathetic moan you'd ever heard, straight out of his chest and hit you straight at your core. The burning coil tight within your stomach was unraveling quickly.

You heard the murmurings of words, among the blood rushing in your ears. Easing up just enough, you let him pull back to speak.

"Tell me this feels good, please."

Your chest thumped, the sight of Art helpless between your legs was one thing. Hearing him beg?

You might black out.

"Art- you feel so fucking good," Dragging him right back where you needed him, the tip of his tongue drove against your clit. "You're gonna' make me cum."

He whined.

A heady drawn-out sound that quite literally sent you over the edge. Your hips lifted off the bench, the heel of your foot digging into his back and making his whine turn into a whimper.

Your orgasm broke you apart until it felt like white-hot flame licking up your sides. Of course, Art never relented, drinking in everything you could give him- literally.

The moment you felt the peak begin to subside, the urge was ramping right back up. Like he knew what he was doing, his eyes locked back onto yours as he sucked at your clit.

He was going for gold.

A quick second orgasm hit, seemingly out of nowhere. Your thighs clenched around Art's head, his hands coming to each of them.

You relaxed yourself a bit, feeling like it might be too much- until you felt him pressing your thighs even harder to either of his ears.

Oh, ok.

Art Donaldson knew what he liked.

You physically had to push him off you, watching him fall back on his outstretched palms as you let yourself breathe for what felt like the first time.

Wet eyes, wet chin, chest rising and falling like he'd run a marathon- Art sat sprawled out before you like he'd stumbled upon an alter (he had).

Breathless, you gestured towards him. Your hand dropped a little as your eyes fell between his legs, wordlessly offering a deal.

A deuce.

His cheeks flushed, more so than they already were. His eyes fell an infinitesimal amount before he spoke up.

"Uh- I already have."

Of course he had. He makes that sound before he cums.

Instead, you heard him shuffle back onto his knees as he all but crawled towards you. He draped his upper half into your lap, head resting against the soft cotton of your skirt.

Coming off the other side of a high, the reality of your situation began to settle for you. Why they'd really called you here- what purpose you really served.

All you could do was gently stroke a hand across Art's head, feeling him go limp against you. Boneless, but not spineless.

He must've known you were going to speak, he must've heard the intake of breath or just felt you shift. He cut you to the chase- beat you to the punchline.

Art nuzzled his face further into your lap as you felt him mumble against your thigh.

"I can't lose- you."

[jeon-ify]

| quit staring - song mingi |

synopsis: it wasn’t the cologne or the grey blazer he put on this evening before the show, nor was it the slight gloss in his lips that made you fall into a craze for the entire night. it was the way his blazer was unbuttoned with nothing underneath. it was the way his chest was so plump with pretty muscles, the crevices and slight contours in his collarbones that made you weak in the knees— weak between your thighs.

warnings: sexting, dom!mingi, sub!bratty reader, reader starts staring hella hard at mingi, degradation (slut, whore, bitch), orgasm denial, fingering, car sex (slight), swearing, if i missed anything, you know what to do!

there mingi was; stood over you, reaching to grab something on either side of you. the quick scent of his fresh cotton and sandalwood scent sends a rush through your nostrils, as well as the body oil he’d rubbed on his chest. he knew what he was doing tonight— using your favorite products to get you into bed all over him later.

he leans over to whisper something in your ear that you almost didn’t catch, but you force yourself to understand for the good of the group. “keep staring at me with your jaw on the floor so people won’t think something of it,”

you didn’t realize how hard you’ve been staring, but mingi felt your eyes burning holes through his torso all evening. you can’t help it when all you can think of is his hands around your throat while you ride him all through the night.

“i wasn’t staring. and you smell good so its hard not to look,” you whisper back. departing with a smirk, he takes his assigned seat across from you. your thighs nearly clench on their own, unaware of your surroundings.

the conversations and soft music continues to flood the room, as your thoughts continue to flood your brain and trying to control yourself becomes harder by the minute.

you finally decide to make a move on your boyfriend because it can’t keep going on like this. at this rate, if you stand up someone will find a patch of your juices on the chair and a wet stain on the back of your dress.

you turn on your phone and look to your left and right, making sure no one is looking at what you’re about to send.

to: my man

please

i need to go home

my man:

Stop staring at me

No im jp

Whats up? Talk to me

to: my man

i want you inside of me

like all the way inside pls

want u to bend me in half and fuck me

knock my lights out im so fr

with the last of your foul messages to mingi, he looks around and glances at you, smirking before shooting his next few texts.

my man:

Yeah? Do i look that good?

Think u deserve a good pounding from how you controlled yourself all night

Dont u think?

your thighs clench and your heart drops to your ass at the texts mingi just typed back to you, your cheeks turning a flushed berry red, and your nose becoming shiny from the thin layer of sweat hugging your skin.

to: my man

my god mingi

pls lets go home come up with a shitty excuse

say that ur brother just called

say he needs a ride somewhere

my man:

Needy girl

Okay. I’ll let hwa know.

Can u start my car? My keys are in ur purse

*seen*

your hands fidget with your purse on autopilot, rushing to remote start his car. you cannot wait to get home— the feeling is building up and you hope it’s mutual just so you’d get the fucking of your life tonight. you see mingi talking to seonghwa about wanting to go home and somehow it works. whatever he says makes seonghwa look worried for a second, but mingi ends up fleeing in faux worry. you get up and greet everyone with mingi behind you, watching everyone say their good lucks to mingi. hiding a laugh in your throat, you walk out of the door and hurry to the passenger seat of your boyfriends car. mingi follows suit, sighing the moment he closes his door.

“what’d you tell him that made him look so worried?” you begin.

“i told him my brother got sick and i had to drive him to the hospital. i don’t even have a brother,”

“as long as it worked. now let’s go home please, mingi.” the car doesnt move, mingi’s tongue pokes through his cheek as he smirks at you, watching the way your thighs clench and your breathing picks up. he breathes out a small chuckle, almost mocking your neediness. “you just can’t wait, can you?”

“no, baby. i can’t, i’ve waited all day.” your breath hitches in your throat when mingi’s long fingers graze through your inner thighs and up your skirt. he tips his head up to face you, planting a kiss on your chin. he moves his fingers up, pushing your panties to the side and sliding a finger between your folds. he rubs up and down, eliciting a couple gasps and moans from you.

“this what you wanted, y/n?” he stares lasers into your face, distracting you from his thick index and middle fingers plunging into your sopping hole. he curls them, pulling the strings of your orgasm and threatening to ruin his expensive custom leathered seats. “oh my g- slow down! i can’t—“ his fingers move at an ungodly pace, making you oh so overwhelmed with how powerful your orgasm is about to be from his fingers alone. when he doesn’t get the response he anticipates, he lands a harsh slap on your clit making you yell.

“that wasn’t my question. is this what you wanted so bad in front of my friends? what if someone saw the dirty texts you were sending me, hm? would you want that?”

just when you’re about to cum, mingi snatches his fingers out of you, pressing the brake and shifting gears to begin driving home. “if you complain about not cumming, you’ll never see the end of it, am i clear?”

“yes,” you breathe out, fixing your panties and trying to calm yourself to the best of your abilities.

the ride becomes slower and more dreadful, waiting to get home to finally reach an orgasm.

after what feels like hours, you arrive home and rush up the stairs to your bedroom, quickly undressing, waiting for mingi to see you ready for him. you hear his footsteps walking up the stairs, inching closer to the bedroom. he locks the door behind him as if anyone were to walk in.

“if you weren’t my girl, i’d think you were a whore. take your bra off.” the words mingi says to you never fail to make you feel like the smallest of the small, and never fail to make your panties wet. you almost drool on yourself, feeling how his sharp cat-like eyes watch your body move and your tits bounce with the moves you make. he undresses himself and hovers over you, grabbing your leg and putting it over his torso. he plants kisses on your neck, up to your jaw and beginning a hot makeout. your tongue explores every inch of his mouth, sucking and breathing in his venom.

“fuck, mingi. please do something.” he continues to grind over your heat, rubbing against your black laced panties. your wet cunt is visible to him through the lace, making his breath pick up. he leans down to suck a generous amount of skin on your right nipple, making your back arch upwards. he sucks and sucks like his life depended on it, blowing on the spot and sending chills through your chest.

“yeah? want me to be rough with you? think you deserve a good pounding after what you did to me at dinner today?” he brings his fingers down to your clit, rubbing quickly before unnoticingly pushing his fat cock into your hole. you try to answer him by apologizing, but you need a moment to adjust to his size.

“fuck! fuck!” you scream out as he straightens himself upwards and has your legs on his shoulders. he pounds into you quicker, not giving you a moment to relax. it’s skin on skin and it’s raw. his tip is kissing your cervix, making your thighs shake on his chest.

“there you go, pounding you like the good bitch you are. gonna knock you up, yeah? wanna walk around with my babies in you?”

beads of sweat begin to form on the base of his chest and the corners of his forehead, making you clench around him. he feels your orgasm approaching, making him slow his thrusts just to bother you.

this fucker.

“faster, mings.” you moan and cry in hopes that he’ll let you cum, but…

“you’re not cumming yet. i’m cumming first tonight, i deserve it.”

“i can’t hold it mingi please please please!” his pace quickens at an ungodly speed, making you fall silent and mingi groaning and whimpering at the feeling. your stomach clenches and mingi continues his abuse on your pussy.

“fuck, oh my god, baby. should have a gangbang from how good this pussy is. wanna share my bitch with my crew, yeah?” he leans down and lands a slap on the right side of your face, making your eyebrows furrow and your lips out from how fucking good your boyfriend is pounding you. the thought of a gangbang makes your pussy clench again around him, making his eyes darker and his chest heave.

“what a whore. wanna fuck my friends and show off what’s mine? you’re not even ashamed?” he grabs your jaw and makes you look into his eyes.

“n-no, just w-want you to fuck me. i live for you, i’m yours to use.”

“good girl, finally your brain works,” his cock throbs in your heat as his thrusts become shallow and slower. your eyes roll back as you try to hold your orgasm again.

“can i cum? please please please can i cum?” you beg, holding his hand and begging for a release.

“cream on my cock, pretty. let me feel you.”

“th-thank you! fuckkk,” it feels like you’re floating when your orgasm finally reaches and you let all go. mingi stops while he’s still in you, waiting for you to calm down before he shoots his load into you.

“gonna take a picture of my cum in you and send it to the groupchat. how’s that sound?”

—————————————————————————————

[neptvnes-melody]

Walk me home

pairing: Katsuki Bakugou x f!reader

summary: After a long day at school, you find yourself walking home with Katsuki, when suddenly it starts pouring, leaving you two with no option but to make a run for it.

word count: 1.8k

warnings: nothing at all, just pure fluff. Katsuki is in looooveee, friends to lovers.

author's note: THIS IS MY FIRST tiME EVER WRITING so please don't flame me if its messy I wrote it in the middle of class, also it's lowkey short.

The sun sank slowly, casting a soft, golden light across the city. The sky was painted with warm tones of peach and lavender, not too bright, not too dim—just enough to feel like the day was ending on a peaceful note. As the colors deepened, there was a quiet stillness in the air, a calm moment as the pink light painted the sky. 

School was finally over after a day that felt like forever. It was hard to deny the fact that after the recent villain attacks, everyone felt a bit unsettled and the school was training your class even harder, which often led to after school training going slightly overtime. As you gathered your things and prepared to leave, you noticed Katsuki lingering by the door of the classroom. You knew that he usually kept to himself, often dismissing anyone who dared to approach him. But lately, something had shifted.

He’d been a little nicer recently, even if he wouldn’t admit it. He started helping you out in training, and finding excuses to talk to you, though still in his usual hot-tempered demeanour, even if just a few words. It was subtle, but it was there: a softness that occasionally crept into his voice when he spoke to you, as if he were testing the waters of a feeling he didn’t quite know how to express.

You gathered the last of your things and started toward the door, sneaking a glance at Katsuki. He looked focused, his brow furrowed, but every so often, his gaze flickered to you.

As you stepped outside, you took a deep breath, enjoying the cool evening air. “It’s nice out today,” you said, trying to break the silence. “I thought it was supposed to rain.”

“Yeah, well, it’s not,” Katsuki replied, a hint of irritation in his tone, but you caught the slight quirk of his lips. “Guess the weather can’t make up its mind. Just like you with training.”

You turned over to him and laughed lightly, playfully nudging him. “Hey! I’m getting better! I think I can keep up with you now.”

He scoffed, “Tch, you think you can keep up? You’re still slower than me, but maybe you’ll get there someday.”

“Someday? How generous of you,” you teased, smirking as you fell into step beside him.

Katsuki rolled his eyes, “Just don’t complain when I leave you in the dust.”

You shared a comfortable silence for a moment, the soft glow of the sunset wrapping around you. As you walked, you glanced over at him, catching the way his jaw tightened slightly, as if he was working through something in his mind.

“Oi, you,” he suddenly called out, breaking the quiet. You turned to him, heart racing a little. “You’re not walking home alone. Let’s go.”

You blinked, caught off guard by his unexpected offer. “Wait, why? You’ve never asked to walk me home before,” you replied, genuine confusion lacing your voice. It was hard to wrap your head around the fact that Katsuki Bakugo, the person who hates when anyone gets even remotely too close to him, is willingly walking home with you.

Katsuki huffed, crossing his arms. “Don’t get any weird ideas. I just don’t want you getting jumped on the way home.”

“Right, because you’re such a knight in shining armor,” you teased, though you couldn’t help the smile creeping onto your face.

___________________

As you both walked home, Katsuki glanced over at you, analysing your features, his expression slightly serious, before speaking up “You really need to stop letting tape arms distract you in training. That guy is annoying as hell.”

You chuckled, shaking your head. “Where’s this suddenly coming from? he’s not that bad, he just likes to have fun.”

“Fun? Is that what you call it? He only acts like that because he likes you,” Katsuki shot back, a hint of bitterness in his tone, sounding almost jealous.

“Pfft, no way! Sero’s just friendly,” you protested, but the blush creeping up your cheeks gave you away.

Katsuki raised an eyebrow, clearly unconvinced. “Sure, keep telling yourself that.” he retorted as he rolled his eyes.

You were about to respond when the first drops of rain finally began to fall, lightly tapping against the pavement. You glanced up, surprised. “Oh shit! I didn’t bring an umbrella!”

Before you could say anything else, Katsuki suddenly grabbed your hand, his grip was firm yet surprisingly gentle. “Come on.”

You stumbled a bit as he started running, pulling you along. Your heart raced not just from the sprint but also from the unexpected closeness. “Katsuki, wait! You’re going too fast!”

“Just keep up!” he shouted, glancing back at you.

As you reached your house, the rain started coming down harder, soaking you both. He finally slowed to a stop, and you took a moment to catch your breath, looking up at Katsuki, who was doing the same. He glanced down, only to realize you were still holding hands. Katsuki blinked, a shy warmth spreading across his cheeks as his eyes widened. He quickly pulled his hand away, trying to mask his embarrassment. You felt a small pang of disappointment from the loss of contact, but it quickly faded as you looked up at him, noticing how the water clung to his blonde hair and annoyingly clear skin, and how his cheeks were flushed from running. Was he always this good-looking? you thought to yourself, before shaking off the thought and bursting into laughter. 

At first, he looked at you with confusion, but soon his lips twitched into a smile, and he joined in your laughter, the sound echoing in the rain-soaked evening. When the laughter finally died down, Katsuki broke the silence, his expression shifting to an awkward grin.

 “Uh, sorry for dragging you through the rain like that,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck.

You smiled, trying to ease the tension. “It’s fine! I mean, it’s not like there was anything else we could do.”

“Yeah, I just didn’t want to stand around like an idiot waiting for the rain to stop.”

You giggled at his honesty,He finally made his way down the path, a satisfied smile lingering as he replayed the moment in his mind. “I appreciate it, really.”

Katsuki huffed, trying to play it cool, but there was a hint of vulnerability in his voice. “Tch, you drive me crazy, you know that?”

“What do you mean?” You chuckled, the question slipped out before you could stop it, catching you off guard.

“Just—don’t get it twisted! It’s not like I actually care or anything,” he snapped, but the slight flush on his cheeks betrayed him. 

You stepped a little closer, emboldened by the atmosphere around you. “Really? Because it sure sounds like you’re starting to enjoy spending time with me,” you teased, a playful smile dancing on your lips.

He shot you a glare, but it lacked its usual intensity. “Shut up. You’re just imagining things.”

“Am I?” you countered, tilting your head slightly. “You could just say that you actually kinda enjoy my presence.”

“Pfft, like I’d admit that,” he retorted, crossing his arms defensively. “You’re just a distraction. It’s not like you make training any easier.”

“But you keep helping me,” you pointed out, your voice softening. “If I’m just a distraction, why bother?”

Katsuki's gaze dropped for a moment, frustration simmering just beneath the surface. “I didn’t ask to be your babysitter. It’s not like I want to—”

“Then why do you?” you pressed gently, feeling the weight of his hesitation.

He opened his mouth to retort but faltered, his expression betraying a mix of annoyance and something softer. “Look, it’s just… you make it hard to focus, okay?”

Just then, the rain began to let up, and you both stood there, unsure of what to say next, realizing how close you were actually standing to him, you could almost feel the warmth radiating from him. Katsuki’s gaze held yours, his eyes searching as if he was trying to decipher a puzzle. The silence stretched, and your heart raced, a mixture of anticipation and uncertainty swirling within you. You could sense the tension thickening between you, pulling you closer despite the distance of mere inches.

In that moment, something sparked within you, urging you to take a chance.

Heart pounding, you took a step closer, closing the distance between you. In a sudden burst of courage, you leaned in and pressed your lips to his. The kiss was quick at first, catching both you and Katsuki off guard. He tensed for a brief moment, surprise flashing in his eyes before he melted into it, his lips moving against yours in a needy way, as if he had been longing for this moment his entire life. One of his hands found its way to the back of your head, fingers threading through your hair, holding you gently yet firmly in place. The other hand slipped around your back, pulling you closer as if he was trying to envelop you in his warmth. It was as if the world around you had faded away, leaving only the two of you and the warmth shared between your bodies.

You pulled away slightly, breathless, a smile creeping onto your face as you tried to process what just happened. But before you could fully collect your thoughts, Katsuki leaned in again, pulling you back toward him, drawing you into another kiss, as if he couldn't get enough of you. You both smiled against each other’s lips, illuminated by the soft glow of the streetlights and the warm lights spilling from nearby houses.

Finally, you both pulled away, breathless, the world around you slowly coming back into focus. Katsuki’s eyes roamed over your face, taking in how the soft glow of the streetlight highlighted your features—the way the light danced in your eyes and the slight flush on your cheeks. He couldn’t shake the feeling of disbelief, still processing what had just happened.

You both stood there, lost for words. 

“Y-you should get inside before you catch a cold.”  he finally managed, his voice barely above a whisper. The shock in his expression made you smile.

“Yeah, I guess so,” you said, forcing yourself to take a step back, but you could still feel the lingering warmth between you.

“Goodnight, then,” you said, taking a deep breath to steady yourself.

“Yeah, night,” he replied, pinching your cheeks lightly before shoving his hands into his pockets as he turned to leave.

Just before he turned the corner, you called after him, “Katsuki!”

He paused, looking back at you with those piercing eyes. “eh?”

 “Thanks for walking me home.”

A soft smile broke out across his face. “Yeah, anytime. Now get your ass inside, if you get sick I’m gonna kill you.” Amused by his response, you stepped through the door and gently closed it behind you. 

And with that, he finally made his way down the path, a satisfied smile lingering as he replayed the moment in his mind.

[wanders-in-wonderland]

Taken: Refusal

It’s past 8pm and you’re walking to your car, one of the last people in the office to leave again. He smiles darkly as he hears the click of your heels against the asphalt, coming towards him. He’s leaning against the wall, covered by the shadow of the parking garage, waiting for you. Your attention is on your purse as you dig through it, looking for your keys. You don’t stand a chance when he surges out of his hiding spot towards you. He grabs you by the throat and pulls your back against his front and shoves a syringe into your arm with his free hand. You’re out cold before you even have time to react.

He catches your body easily, carrying you to your car. He slides your prone body into the trunk, closes the lid, gets into the front seat, and drives away.

Thirty minutes later, he pulls into the garage of a house at the edge of town, miles away from anything and anyone else. He pulls you out of the trunk and carries you into the house, down the stairs, into the basement. There, he gets to work.

The basement room is well-lit and set up almost like a bedroom. A beautiful king-sized bed sits in the middle of the room with a dark wooden dresser against the wall, and a second door leading to a well-decorated bathroom. The only thing out of place is the large St. Andrew’s cross opposite the bed. He hums slightly as he works, feeling giddy with excitement at finally having you here. He‘s not in a rush, he’d injected you with enough sedative to keep you unconscious for several hours, giving him plenty of time to do what he needs to.

The first thing he does is cut away your clothes. He takes care not to accidentally nick you with the knife and smooths his hands across your body gently, almost reverently. He sighs a little, you aren’t going to be happy when you wake up, but soon, he’ll show you how good it is here. And you’ll be so happy with him.

He ties your naked body to the cross, your arms and legs spread eagle and affixed to the wood with rope. He wraps an extra piece of rope around your waist to keep you in place so you won’t be able to move when you wake up.

He runs his fingers up your thigh, watching as goosebumps erupt in his wake. Your skin is so soft. His fingers keep going upwards, going to between your legs as he parts your folds with his fingers. He slides his finger over your clit, rubbing gently at first, then with more pressure. Your breathing hitches and your body twitches slightly as the pleasure permeates into your unconscious mind. He smiles, rubbing faster and harder against your clit. He slides a second finger against your slit, feeling the moisture starting to gather. You’re so responsive and you’re not even awake yet. He pulls his fingers away, not wanting to have too much fun quite yet. You make a small, simpering noise, almost like you want him to keep going.

He steps away for a second, grabbing a ball gag from his pile of toys. He pulls your hair back gently, opens your mouth, and clips the gag into place. You look so pretty, all tied up and gagged. He grabs a small remote-controlled bullet vibrator next, along with a harness fitted specially for it. He slides the vibrator against you, positioning it directly on your hard little clit and latches the harness around you, keeping the vibrator flush against you. He clicks the remote, and watches as the vibrator starts to buzz at its lowest setting against your clit.

Your body reacts immediately. Your cheeks flush, your breathing deepens, and your legs start to tremble. He runs his fingers against your slit, finding you dripping wet and your pretty pussy clenching. He collects some of your slick on his fingers and brings it to his mouth, savoring the taste of your pussy. He takes a few steps back, sitting down on the bed as he waits.

—

You slowly come into consciousness, feeling your body clench as something is pressed up against your pussy. Something that feels so good. But before you can fully appreciate it, alarm bells are going off in your head. What happened? Where are you? The last thing you remember was going to your car, and then…

You start, remembering the man, being grabbed, the sting of the syringe. Your eyes fly open and you take in several things at once. You’re naked, you’re tied to a cross, you’re gagged, and you’re so close to cumming.

You wail into the gag but the sound is muffled and desperate. Your eyes dart around the room, blinking against the light.

“Welcome back, darling.”

Your eyes shoot to the man. You don’t understand. But before you can think, you see the man click a remote and the vibrating on your clit intensifies. Suddenly all you can think of is the pleasure that’s shooting through your body. You arch your back as much as you can and you scream into the gag as you cum hard. You shake in the ropes slightly as you come down from your high, trembling as the aftershocks hit you and the vibrator is still going strong. Your hips thrust, trying to dislodge the vibrator that’s slowly pushing you towards overstimulation. You wail desperately against the gag. He smiles as he clicks the remote one more time and the vibrations stop.

You’re breathing heavily as you hang from the cross, your body going slack. You whimper into the gag softly.

“That went even better than I’d planned,” he said, clearly proud of himself. He’s deranged, you think to yourself. What the fuck is happening?

“Here I was thinking you’d get nicely started with that bullet vibrator, I didn’t think you’d cum like that right when you woke up. You, my dear, are deliciously responsive.”

He walked towards you, brushing his fingers against your cheek. You shook him off, moving your head has much as you could.

“Tsk tsk don’t be like that.”

“LET ME GO!” You screamed through the gag. It sounded more like “EE ME OO.” But he seemed to get the point.

“Now now let me talk first. You’ll want to hear me out. I know exactly who you are and what I’m doing. I took you and I am keeping you and the sooner you accept that, the better it will all be.” You shake your head in confusion.

“You see, I know your type, the pretty girl with not much in your life. You have a mediocre job, very few friends, no boyfriend, hardly any family. No one will miss you. No one will look for you.” As he speaks, his fingers begin to trail up and down your torso. He circles your breasts, gently rubbing your stomach before coming to a stop right above your pelvis.

Real fear strikes you in that moment. He’s right. No one would come for you. You don’t even know if anyone would file a missing person’s report. Maybe your boss when you don’t show up for work but realistically, they’d just hire someone else to replace you in a few weeks. You’re shaking as you stare back at him.

“Now, lucky for you, I think you’re perfect for me. Exactly what I’m looking for in a pretty little pet. All it’s gonna take is a little training.”

Your eyes widen and you scream objections into the gag. He looks annoyed now, and the hand that was rubbing gentle circles against your hip suddenly tightened into a bruising grip. He came in close, close enough for you to see the flecks of color in his eyes.

“You were doing so well, don’t make me punish you already.”

You scream even more, wailing, hoping that maybe someone will hear you and come to help. His bruising grip on your hip loosens for a second and suddenly, he slaps you across the face.

You start in pain but mostly in shock and fear. The slap scared you more than it hurt you. Tears welled up in your eyes and you stared back at him desperately.

“Now are you going to be a good girl?” His voice was low and dark, underpined with something that you couldn’t decipher.

You shake your head, fear overriding your sense of self-preservation as you buck and thrash on the cross as if it’ll help you get free.

“Fine, if you won’t be good, I’ll show you what happens to bad girls.”

You struggle harder, desperately trying to get free. He leaves your line of sight and eventually, you tire and start to sag in your ropes. You hear a click, and suddenly, the vibrator against your clit, the one you’d all but forgotten about in your fear, roars to life. It vibrates furiously against your clit, at an intensity so much higher than before and you feel your pussy clench as you screams at the stimulation. Your previous orgasm seemed so long ago but the violent stimulation quickly overwhelms you.

You whine and shake as you feel yourself rushing to another orgasm.

“Aw honey are you going to cum again? You filthy little whore cumming for your kidnapper while you’re tied up.”

You feel your orgasm coming, the feeling cresting inside of you, when suddenly, the vibrator clicks off.

“No, cumming is for good girls and you were bad.”

You moan into the gag, staring at him with tears in your eyes. Your hips gyrate, trying to find the stimulation to push yourself over the edge but your orgasm is fading quickly.

“You don’t deserve to cum. No, you deserve to be punished.” The dark promise in his voice made your heart pound with fear, but your pussy clenched in response.

He walked up to your body, looking down at your puffy little clit, straining against the vibrator attached to you. He ran his fingers gently over your button, chuckling as you bucked and groaned.

“You’re soaking wet. The perfect little whore for me.” He growled into your ear and kissed the side of your neck softly before sinking his teeth in, feeling you flinch and grow taut as he gently lapped at the sting he’d inflicted. His fingers danced along your slit, running around your lips and clit but never entering you, despite how badly you wanted him to.

“I think this bad little girl needs to think about her mistakes.” He says and he pulls away. He walks a few steps away and you wail against the gag.

“NO PLEASE, DON’T LEAVE ME LIKE THIS!” It comes out garbled but he seems to understand. “You need to learn your lesson, darling.”

He smiles then he leaves. You lean against the cross, feeling drained and defeated but all of a sudden, the vibrator comes to life again. You shriek and thrash, feeling the pleasure in your clit spread as you rush toward an orgasm. But like before, right as you were about to cum, the vibrator stops. You scream desperately, moaning, begging incoherently behind the gag. As the orgasm ebbs away, the vibrator starts again.

[andieperrie18]

Prompt: what's so hard between picking a woman who intends to stay and have future with you to a woman who just ends up lying and leaving you everytime? Reader is certainly not the type of person to be anxious of a woman. As she is better her.

English is not my first language and have mercy on ny broke grammar. I just needed to vent my jealousy.

----

"He's gonna choose her…"

Y/n felt her brow twitch from the statement that echoed through her earpiece. She turned towards the across her, in another glass containing the very woman her fiance can't seem to ever let go of.

Ada Wong was a past fling, if one could even call her that for the number of times he always coincidentally met her, that he can not seem to forget even when he was about to have a new future with Y/n. And at first, she understood and intended to work harder for their future, and just maybe it will encourage her.

But here she was. Long story short, Leon and Y/n were tasked to find and bring to custody a mad scientist that was currently working on a rather strong strain of the G-virus. And due to circumstances, Y/n was abducted. 

Ada ended up in the class container due to helping Leon escape on one route. It was heartbreaking to find the man who is supposed to be your soon to be husband, find a certain difficulty on who to save. To a point that he forgets why you are ranked higher than him and have more experience, and have easily put down this woman in red to the ground.

"Who is going to be Mr. Kennedy?!!" The scientist cackled loudly as the said gripped his pistol towards the mad man as he stood before two buttons. Where it is pointed to each of the boxes of the woman he is to choose to save.

He can only choose one as if he were to choose both, the scientist would press the control on his hand to kill both women.

It angered Y/n. It angers her that this situation and his obsession with a woman who always leaves him for more, is someone he can not let go of. He could barely even realize the disappointment on his fiances face.

"Captain L/n, this is taking too long enough, this mission will fail if we–"

"Shoot him." Y/n cut off the person on com as here eyes switch back and forth between Ada and Leon.

"Shoot scientist." She said rather loudly.

An action that took everyone in the room by surprise. Leon finally focused towards her but with confusion, the DSO needed the man alive. Why would he shoot the guy dead. "The DSO needs him alive Y/n you know we can not just do that,"

He spat, his eyes looking back at her. She finally looked at her, a sour taste hit his tongue and his chest churned at her stare. Her eyes were blank and devoid of spark. It was as if she was disappointed rather than scared.

"Shoot him. Now." She said once more. 

A wail soon echoed in the room and the door burst open to the lab they were in dropped to the floor. Leon turned to meet soldiers, back up. He turned to the terrace that the scientist stood, he found the guy was now being hold down, the remote away from him.

"We'll take it from here, Agent." A soldier said to him with a rather distasteful tone and the sound of chains lowering was heard. Leon saw the boxes were now lowered and sood both women out.

Ada was confused as no soldier was immediately to grab her. But her eyes directed her towards their savior.

Y/n was surrounded by soldiers that began giving her a bunch of gears. She walked between her fiance and the other woman. Or in Y/n's mind, the only woman that Leon Kennedy could ever love.

Shame was etched on the male's face but Y/n paid no mind.

The woman tossed something to Ada, who in turn caught it messily. It was her trusty grapple gun she always use to get away from Leon.

"Since you like playing chase, I guess you need that. Since you were quite an asset to get the madman, I'll give you an ultimatum Miss Wong. You can leave now and leave your chat with Agent Kennedy for another time…"

Leon frowned at how cold his last name escaped Y/n lips. Considering it was the supposed last name she was intending to carry.

"... Or you can stay here and get to chat with him before I pulverize you to the ground myself. We've fought before, I can assure you that those were not my 100% because I was intending to keep your face pretty since my ex-fiance likes it so much."

There is an animalistic glint in Y/ns eyes. One that made Ada took a step back as the woman loomed over her, surrounded by armed men, out numbering her. So he grappled aways but not before sparing Leon a quick gaze.

One that Y/n didn't not miss.

She then turns to the male. 

Leon failed to form words and had kept his mouth shut. He attempted to walk to her but something told him not to.

"Escort Mr. Kennedy back to the chopper. He is no longer fit carry on the mission."

And she turns her back with him watching.

---+

Who knew love could have a limit.

[seoulmatez]

୨♡୧ SICK DELIGHT — dan heng x reader. vampire!dan heng. blood. reader has fairly long hair. suggestive. not canon compliant.

“are you sure you don’t want to go out? it’s dark now.” you look at dan heng over your shoulder. he’s stretched out across the mattress with an open book resting on his stomach, eyes closed and hands tangled in inky black strands of hair. he breathes out a sigh through his nose before letting his eyes flutter open. it takes no time at all for his vision to adjust. everything is sharper and more defined—even in the dimly lit room, it’s as if he can see everything. he’d think it was nice if the sensation wasn’t such an overwhelming change.

dan heng shakes his head lightly against the pillow; any harder and he’s sure he would be met with a fit of dizziness. it’s been some time since he last fed and the effects are beginning to catch up to him. his limbs feel heavy and he’s moving slower than usual but he tells himself that it’s preferable to the guilt that washes over him when you offer yourself as sustenance.

“okay. we can just watch a movie then,” you suggest, making your way from the dresser to join him on the bed. you plop down beside him, remote in hand, and start on your search for something to watch. 

recently, most of your nights have ended like this; dan heng declining your offer to venture outside the walls of your apartment and you finding an alternative way to entertain the both of you. you can’t blame him for his reluctance to leave. he hasn’t had much time to grow accustomed to his new circumstances.

it’s only been a few weeks since you found him curled up in one of the alleyways you pass on your way home from work. before that moment, dan heng was merely an acquaintance; someone you were familiar with but would barely consider a friend. still, seeing him in such a state pulled at your heartstrings. no matter how hard he weakly protested,  there was no way you could leave him there.

that’s how he ended up living with you.

he still can’t wrap his head around why you let him stay after finding out the truth.

after a couple more minutes of thoughtless scrolling, you turn on something similar to what you’ve noticed dan heng is interested in. music that accompanies the opening credits of the film fills the room once you press play. you glance over to the man next to you to find his eyes closed like they had been earlier.

“are you feeling okay?” you ask, a frown etched into your features.

your voice almost sounds far away despite your proximity and even though his perception of it is off, it’s enough to make him blink twice before meeting your eye. dan heng has to think back to what you said before he breathes out a reply. “hm? yeah.”

it wouldn’t take a genius to know that he wasn’t being truthful. looking back on the past few days, you come to realize that he’s been less mobile. even with the blackout curtains you installed, he hasn’t been wandering behind you like usual. the deviation from what he’s established as “normal” persists in this moment. it’s as if there’s a fog clouding his brain, getting in the way of his senses. there’s only one explanation that comes to your mind. “when’s the last time you fed?”

he turns his head on the pillow so that he’s looking at the ceiling. “i’m fine.”

“liar. and that’s not what i asked.” you’re almost positive that dan heng hasn’t left the apartment since you welcomed him and the last time he hesitantly accepted blood from you was more than seven days ago. “it’s been over a week, hasn’t it?”

you’re right, but dan heng doesn’t plan on telling you so, so he keeps his gaze locked on the ceiling. he may feel like shit now but isn’t willing to let some fatigue and lightheadedness lure him into leeching off of you.

even though you’re staring at him, dan heng refuses to look at you. you chew the inside of your cheek as you contemplate whether or not it’s reasonable for you to be so concerned for him. it doesn’t take more than a few seconds for you to decide to tell him what you’re thinking. “look, i don’t know a lot about vampires but going long periods of time without your life source can’t be good—especially since you’re so new to all of… this.”

you broadly gesture with your hands as if that’ll make your point any more apparent. either the motion or your words strike a cord in dan heng because he lifts his head from the cushion and sits up to face you. however, the uneasiness painted on his face is enough to tell you that he isn’t entirely convinced.

“i get that it’s probably uncomfortable,” you start, recalling the past times he’s fed on you and the way he would promptly apologize, rushing away from you in favor of holing up in the living room by himself. “ but i want to help any way i can if you aren’t feeling well.”

dan heng knows that you’re more than willing to be of service to him. it’s nice of you, nicer than he deserves. as much as he’s been trying to ignore it, the truth is that feeding feels good. it’s incomparable to the satisfaction that used to come from eating, it’s better—so much better. the metallic taste had been unpleasant the first time around but it soon turned into something sweet, made him feel like an electric buzz was coursing through him. now, it sets every nerve in his body ablaze and makes him feel warm—a warmth he hasn’t felt in what feels like forever.

you level him with a pleading look. “please, let me help you.”

he doesn’t know if it’s the sparkle of desperation in your eyes, the waver in your voice, or the nagging feeling of thirst that finally makes him nod his head. a relief floods over you with his agreement. 

the two of you have only done this a handful of times but enough that you know how he prefers the process. you scoot forward on the mattress so he can settle himself behind you. he favors it over being in front of you where it would be easier for you to see him. the bed dips as he comes to sit behind you. a cold air follows dan heng, cooler than usual. if you had to guess, you’d say it was due to the recent lack of blood in his diet.

you tilt your head, causing your hair to fall to the side which leaves your neck exposed. the punctures from last time have all but faded and are barely recognizable. despite the compelling scent of you wafting around him, tickling his nose, dan heng’s hands hover over your waist and he keeps a safe distance between his mouth and your throat.

“ready?” his breath raises goosebumps on your arms.

you hum. “go ahead.”

with your final prompting, he firmly grips your midsection. dan heng’s fangs shoot out as he drops his head to the crook of your neck. the sharp, pointed teeth pierce the delicate skin of your neck. you stifle the gasp that bubbles up at the discomfort of what feels like two needles penetrating you. the rest—when his fangs retract, that is—isn’t nearly as painful. the sensation is a strange one, draining you physically and mentally. it leaves you faint, but still conscious.

for dan heng, the experience is almost euphoric. any heaviness lingering in his muscles lifts as he swallows down the blood leaking from your neck. more than that, he feels like he’s awake—lucid—for the first time in a while. that electricity that seemingly always follows not long after the initial alleviation of the consumption sparks within him. 

he’s had his fill by now, but he’s greedy for more—more blood, more of you. he licks up the dripping lines of red, readying to latch onto you once more when he catches sight of the sheets balled up in your fist. like his rationality has been switched back on, dan heng recoils, almost scrambling from behind you. 

“sorry.” he wipes his lips with the back of his hand. when he pulls it away from his mouth, a streak of red is left behind. seeing it hits dan heng with a pang of the familiar guilt that comes after feeding from you. 

he whispers out another apology before moving to leave but your hand darts out to catch his wrist. dan heng turns to face you. he’s never met your eye once he’s finished; he usually makes a conscious effort to avoid looking at you after he’s fed. he expects to see the worst painted on your face—pain, disgust, fear. but they’re all absent. your expression is as normal as can be—the one you wear when you’re making breakfast or when you return home or when you’re watching a movie with him. it leaves dan heng frozen in his spot.

“you don’t have to go,” you tell him, your voice a little frail. your hand slithers down from his wrist to his palm, his skin smooth beneath your fingers. you interlace your fingers with his and gently tug him toward you. “just stay.”

dan heng thinks he has every reason not to. it can’t be normal and he can’t be sure that his overwhelming desire for more won’t resurface. but the feel of your hand in his and the hopefulness swimming in your eyes makes him reconsider. 

the final nail in the coffin is hammered in when you squeeze his hand and send him a small smile. he’s not sure why, but he can’t say no to you. “okay.”

thanks for reading! consider commenting or reblogging if you enjoyed ❤︎

[minkyungseokie]

𝔸𝕣𝕚𝕖𝕤 | The Beginning

warnings; none for this part

note; I'm going to be so deadass, I had no idea how to start this. It starts in 2020, but the gifs won't be from that time. It's so hard to find gifs for Alex and even harder to find one of both Alex and Lily. If you know where I can find some good ones, lmk

Anyway this is almost like a soul mate au kind of thing, but not at the same time. Also, pretend The Uncanny Counter came out earlier than November

fc; Jung Ho-Yeon

Alex Masterlist​ | Autosports Masterlist | Main Masterlist

​Series/Full Fic Masterlist ​| Talk to me​

Like the Stars Above Us | Next ❧

I do not give anyone permission to change, copy, or put my work on any other platform. It will only be on top, so if you see it, please report it. Or let me know.

A short girl sat in her LA apartment with her remote in hand and a bored look on her face. She was bored and had nothing to occupy her time or entertain her that way her days won't be so long and mundane.

The girl sighed and tossed the remote to the side before picking up her phone to see if her boyfriend had sent her any messages, but when she saw nothing, she huffed. She knew he wasn't really busy with work since they were all told to go home and quarantine. 

With yet another sigh, Lily Muni He opened up her Instagram and took a picture before putting a question sticker somewhere on it that read; 'currently bored. give me some show suggestions to get me through quarantine.'

Lily then swiped out of the app and opened the messenger app, clicking on her boyfriend's contact and sending him a quick message just saying good morning. Lily had to wait a bit in order to get some good answers so she didn't know what to do to pass the time until then.

The woman stood up and went into her kitchen to see what kind of things she had to nibble on while she watched whatever was recommended. 

After a few minutes. Lily finally sat back down on her couch and picked up her phone. The Chinese woman opened Instagram and looked through all of the suggestions that her followers had sent in. As she looked through the suggestions, she looked at the shows descriptions on Netflix.

None of them caught her eyes or made her want to look at them and as the number of suggestions dwindled, Lily's hope to find something to occupy her time did as well. "Well, there's only one more. Let's hope this one is good or I'll lose my mind." Lily muttered, looking to the side where the hutch of her rabbits sat.

Lily looked at the last suggestion and stared at the title with a furrowed brow. Sometimes the gut would let people know whether something was a good idea or a bad one, but she had never had a gut feeling that she should watch something before. Lily put her phone down and searched for the title she was given.

'The Uncanny Counter'

Lily didn't even read the description of the show. She just clicked play on her remote and started watching the series.

𝐍𝐨𝐰 𝐥𝐨𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠. . .𝐍𝐨𝐰 𝐥𝐨𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠. . .ᴄᴏᴍᴘʟᴇᴛᴇ!

Lily didn't know how long she had been sitting on the couch and watching the Korean drama, but she knew that she was hungry, kind of tired, and her butt was numb. As soon as episode four was over, Lily paused the show and rubbed her eyes.

Her head turned to the side, gazing out the window as she yawned tiredly. It took her a few moments before she did a double take and looked out the window once more. 

It was dark out. She had been so engrossed in the show that she didn't realize that it was getting dark out, which meant that her lover had probably finished whatever he was doing and he was probably worried that she hadn't answered her phone like she usually did.

Lily turned back to the couch and practically dived to grab her phone off the spot on the couch where she last tossed it away. Lily groaned as she saw that she had, in fact, missed a couple of texts from her boyfriend. Lily pressed the call button and put the phone up to her ear.

"Hello, love." The voice of her boyfriend greeted, "Hey, baby. I'm sorry that I missed your texts. I was watching this show and it was just so good that I forgot to do anything other than watch." Lily rushed out. 

The man chuckled, immediately soothing Lily's nerves, "It's okay. I did the same to you earlier while I was streaming. What was the show you were watching?" He asked. 

Lily brightened and stood up straighter, "Oh Alex, it's such a good show. It's a Korean drama about a disabled boy...actually, we should watch it together. We can FaceTime while watching it and you can fall down the rabbit hole with me." Lily suggested.

"I don't know. It doesn't sound like something I'd be interested in." Alex said, "Oh, come on! Alex, it'll be so fun! We can do one of those Netflix watch party thingies. You'll fall in love with it just like I did." Lily tried.

"I'll think about it. How did you even find out about this show? I didn't think you'd be interested in Korean dramas." Alex said, "It was recommended to me by one of my followers. I wasn't going to watch it, but... this is going to sound completely crazy, but I felt drawn to the show and I didn't understand why." Lily started explaining 

Alex cleared his throat on the other en of the phone, "What do you mean you felt drawn to it?" Alex questioned, "You know how you said you felt drawn to me? It was like that, but to the show." Lily answered

"Uh-huh." 

"Before you judge me, pull up Netflix and look at the show 'The Uncanny Counter' tell me if you feel it too." Lily all but pleaded with her boyfriend. "Okay, love. I'll do it. Just take a deep breath and calm down." Alex's voice grew soft when he heard the panic in Lily's voice.

Lily inhaled through her nose until she could physically no longer breath in before exhaling through her mouth, "Are you calm?" Ales spoke up after a few more inhales and exhales.

Lily nodded before realizing that Alex couldn't see her, "Yeah, but can we Facetime? I need to see you." Lily said breathily, "Of course, baby. Hold on." Alex hung up the phone before the familiar sound of the FaceTime ringtone rang, piercing the momentarily quiet air.

Lily answered, sitting down and propping up the phone on the coffee table, "Hey, you look gorgeous." Alex complimented, giving his girlfriend a cheesy smile. Lily giggled and looked at Alex with nothing but adoration in her eyes, "Well, let's look at this show you were talking about." Alex said, picking up his remote.

"Did you eat something bad today? Could that be the reason for the feeling you had? What was it called again?" Alex questioned, "No, I didn't eat anything bad. It's called The Uncanny Counter. I think I know what it was that drew me to the show." Lily said, watching her boyfriend pull up the show.

She watched as Alex's smile disappeared, "You feel it too, don't you?" Lily asked. Alex nodded, "Now do me a favor and look up the name Jung Y/n. Tell me if you also feel it then. I saw her name in the opening credits and I got the same feeling." Lily said.

Alex looked down at his laptop with a dazed look on his face, 'Is that how I looked when I saw her?' Lily couldn't help but wonder. 

"Do you know what it is? This feeling?" Alex questioned, looking up at his gorgeous girlfriend. Lily shook her head, "I don't, but I want to get to the bottom of it. I feel like we need to watch more in order to get to the bottom of it, don't you think?" Lily asked.

Alex looked back down at the laptop, "All we know so far is from this. She's a 19-year-old South Korean actress and model who has been working in the industry since she was at least six, but could've started earlier. She's appeared in both Japanese and Korean dramas and films that are all hits. She has a YouTube channel, a Twitch channel, and is apparently acting in a Japanese drama coming out in December." Alex reads.

"So we have plenty to watch until we can go back to work, huh?" Lily asked, smiling at Alex. "We sure do." Alex agreed.

The girl sighed and slumped down in her chair. Filming more than one series at a time was tiring and what made it even more complicated was the fact that one was filmed in Japan and the other was filmed in South Korea. 

It was a lot to do, but it was well worth it. The Uncanny counter was filmed in January, February, March, and April while Alice in Borderland would film May, June, July, and August.

As the good ol' saying goes, 'There's no rest for the wicked' and sure enough, there would be no rest for her until the end of summer when all filming would wrap up. And then The Uncanny counter is slowly releasing during the filming of Alice in Borderland and Alice in Borderland would release in December.

Y/n ran a hand through her hair and looked around at her coworkers doing their scenes. She was used to constantly working as she had been doing this since she was six-years-old, but that didn’t make it any less tiring to do. 

Plus, she had never done two shows in a row before so it would make sense that she’s tired.

A voice called, pulling Y/n out of her stupor, “Coming!” The woman answered back, getting up tiredly.

“Did you stay up all night watching that sport you like again?” The coworker asked, nudging the girl, “No, I didn’t stay up all night watching Formula One. The races have been put on hold due to Covid, so there isn’t much to watch other than old races.” Y/n yawned, stretching her arms above her head.

The two walked on set and waited for the director's direction, “Okay, let’s get this started.”

a/n; I know it's short, but it's just a sort of introduction to it all. I should've published this earlier, but as I have mentioned, I have a job now where I have to work from 3PM to 11:30PM and next week it'll be 5PM to 3:30 AM. I'll get as much done as I can, but don't expect much this week

[imtooscaredforthis]

Entrapment

Chapter Twenty Four: Unexpected

Mentions of: Dubcon/noncon themes, stabbing, death, and murder, etc.

A/N: some more pervy Johnny for you lmao

Tags: @dead-bxxxtch-walking @mama-miya @moonshineinasippycup @stwbwwychan @vandeaad @the-fandoms-georgie

“I feel like we haven’t talked in forever. How are you? How is everything?” Rachel asked as the two of you exited the building together and walked to the parking lot.

“I’m good. Work has been pretty good. Jed is a great partner.” You admitted with a shrug.

“I’m sure he is. You guys getting along good?” She asked with a teasing grin. “Yeah- what’s that look for?”

“Nothing. So you guys are close?” You don’t like where this is going.

“I mean, yeah- but..” You scoffed when you noticed Rachel’s smug grin. She’s onto you.

“Will you quit it? He and I are just friends. He’s like a brother to me.” You lied.

Rachel laughed at that. “Bullshit. I’m not dumb. I can tell when two people are fucking, and you and Jed totally are. But don’t worry, your secret’s safe with me. No judgment here.”

Before you could finish your conversation, the two of you split up, and she went to her car, while you walked home. You looked over your shoulder to make sure the coast was clear before you called after her.

“Jed and I aren’t- we’re not fucking, okay?! We’re just friends.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever helps you sleep at night, babe!” She called back. You rolled your eyes, shaking your head as you walked off, trying to ignore how flustered she had gotten you.

It’s fine. She won’t tell anyone. At worst she’ll just keep teasing you like this. Even if it was annoying, there wasn’t much you could do about it.

—

Once you got back home, you changed your clothes and had a glass of wine to wind down. But you didn’t relax, no. You never relax anymore. How could you when you know he’s still out there, harming more innocent people? Jesse, Lucia and Nate all deserved justice. You weren’t going to rest until you got it for them.

As you ate your dinner, you stared at the bulletin board you put up on your wall, with pictures of Ghostface’s victims, reports of his last sightings, and anything you could find. You managed to make some connections as to where he would find his victims.

You did find quite a few that went to Walleye’s but there were still inconsistencies here and there. All you knew was that most of them were average people, middle class and normal, which makes it even harder for him to figure out who he’s after next.

You stared at the board for a little while, before sitting down on your couch, running a hand through your hair. With all the time you had been spending with Jed, you haven’t been able to focus much on this. But today, he was out sick, giving you more room to think about Ghostface, even if you didn’t want to.

With a frustrated sigh, you grabbed the remote, clicking on the TV.

“Breaking news: Couple Marie and Carlton Thomas have been found dead in their home this afternoon.”

You stared at the screen in complete shock as a photo of them flashed onto the tv, listening as it continued. “The couple was found by a neighbor this evening when they noticed that their back door was open and their dog had escaped. They were stabbed to death, both having almost twenty wounds each. So the question we’re all wondering is: could this be another Ghostface murder?”

“We’re still figuring out motives, but the possibility is there. We’re working as hard as we can to catch this guy and all we can say right now is follow the curfew and lock your doors at night, and if you see anything suspicious, don’t be afraid to say something.” The sheriff said.

You couldn’t watch any more of this bullshit. You reached over and shut off the tv, sighing softly. Staring at the black reflection of the screen, you realized someone was standing behind you.

“Boo.” You sprung up from the couch, gasping in surprise. You turned on your heel trying to face him straight on. You moved so fast that you stumbled forward, causing him to catch you.

“Careful there, sweetheart, we don’t want you getting hurt do we?” Ghostface cooed in that same condescending tone. You tore yourself from his grip, glowering at him.

You stepped back into the kitchen, grabbing a knife and raising it threateningly. “Stay the fuck away from me.”

How did he even get in? How did you not notice him? He has been standing behind you while you were watching, and you were completely vulnerable. He could’ve easily killed you, but he didn’t. He was toying with you.

“Oh, come on, Dollface. Don’t be like that. I missed you. And from what I can tell, you missed me too.” He gestured to the bulletin board on your wall, before walking over to you. He took slow steps, like a predator ready to pounce.

Just because he didn’t want to kill you didn’t mean he didn’t want to hurt you..but you knew attacking him would only end badly. You lowered the knife slightly, but didn’t let it go.

He moved swiftly, grabbing your wrist and slamming it against the wall, making you drop the knife. “There you go. Good girl.”

“What do you want from me?” You couldn’t help but ask, angry and fearful. “What? Can’t we just have a nice little chat? You’re the one who pulled out the knife.”

He released your wrist, letting you go. “I think it’s time we catch up. You’ve been doing a lot lately, haven’t you? Had a lot of fun with your little Boy Scout?”

“Boy Scout? You mean-”

“Your little boyfriend? Jeb or Jed or whatever? The one who’s helping you write articles on me? Yeah, him. I’ve been watching you two..and you really seemed to be enjoying yourself, slut.”

You felt yourself grow flustered from humiliation and embarrassment. “Don’t hurt him.”

“Awww you want to protect him, how sweet. Don’t worry, toots. I’m not planning on it. As long as you behave, that is. Though I will say, I am jealous.” You felt his other arm hook around your back, the cool blade pressing into you and making you arch forward and into his touch, and his hand moved from your wrist to your chin, tilting your head upward while he examined your body.

“Such a pretty thing. I wouldn’t mind having you myself.” He pressed his knife into your back, forcing your waist to press against his, feeling his hardness.

He forced your shirt upwards, and you tried to stop him, but he smacked your hands away. He smirked. “No bra? How naughty.”

He eyed your tits, while you squirmed slightly in his grip, trying to get him to stop, but the harsh press of his knife and his groin managed to get you to still. His gloved hand caressed your breasts, before sliding down to your stomach.

“Yeah, we’re definitely gonna have some fun later.” You could hear the lust and smugness in his voice.

“What makes you think I would want to do any of that with you? I don’t even want to touch you! I hate you!” You hissed in disgust.

“Oh, I know you do. But you don’t have a choice do you? Not if you want your friends to live.” He leaned over and pressed his mask to your ear, his voice lowering. “You think Jed’s good? I’ll have you screaming and crying for me. And you’ll love it like the good little whore you are.”

He slightly ground his hardness against you, and you bit your lip to hold back a whimper. He removed his knife from your back, pressing it against your front instead. With the flick of his wrist, he cut your stomach, causing you to cry out.

“Just something to remember me by. Don’t worry, I’ll be back, and we’ll have fun very soon.”

He let you go, stalking off into your bedroom, and leaving out the side window onto the fire escape.

Yeah, you need to change your locks.

[daniyanii]

YANDERE KILLMONGER:

‘Slow Death’- Episode 1

I was hiding from Erik in my apartment. I never told him where I lived so I figured I’d be safe at home.

My phone was literally pinging so much the dings weren’t even able to fully ring out before another one cut it off. Finally picking it up, I realized it was hot to the touch.

+1 (473) 372-3639: Y/n please, just talk to me

+1 (473) 372-3639: I know you felt what i felt last night, you don’t have to deny it. I swear I want you

+1 (473) 372-3639: Why the fuck didn’t you go to the bar??

+1 (473) 372-3639: I fucking swear Y/n if you dont pick up your phone, I will find you and it wont be pretty.

Great, now he was threatening me. I had seen Erik half naked last night and I knew that whatever I could do to him, he could do back to me 10x harder. There were too many scars on him for him to be affected by my weak attacks

So, I picked up on his next call. Anything to stop him from looking for me further.

“Baby??” His frantic voice rung out before I could say anything

“Hello?” I mustered the courage to talk back

“Thank god you’re ok. Baby why did you leave me?? you scared the shit outta me.”

“I-I had work…”

“Baby, stop lying to me. I know you don’t gotta work till tuesday, today’s saturday.”

“H-How did you know that?” I was now super worried because if he knew that then he definitely knew more.

“I know everything about you love. You cant hide it from me, I’m the one for you.”

“Erik please, I’m not looking for a relationship at all right now. And I’m sorry if I didn’t make that clear last night.”

A moment of silence flew and then you heard Erik’s deeply disturbed chuckles.

“You don’t get that choice anymore baby, you just don’t understand the love I have for you. I licked it so it’s mine, and i’m coming to get what’s mine.”

“Erik you’re not understanding. I dont wanna be with anyone right now. Im sorry if you thought I wasn’t serious about that but I need time to heal from my last relationship still.”

That was a lie I am 110% over my ex. I wouldn’t go back to him even if every other man on this earth spontaneously combusted. But I am still uncomfortable with relationships and the level of vulnerability people have to display in a relationship.

“Heal? What the fuck did that nigga do to the point you gotta heal? I swear just tell me who he is baby and I’ll get him out the the way… forever.” he sounded much too serious

“Look Erik, I really had a great time but last night was the end of whatever we had. I…I think you took it the wrong way so let me be very clear. I do not want to be with you or anyone. I really just want to get to know myself more and im sorry if it’s hard for you to detach from someone you’ve had sex with but I need you to do it. I’m just not the girl you’re looking for right now and i’m really sorry for making you think I was.”

“You done?” Erik responded boredly, like what you were saying was just an unnecessary manual.

“Um…yeah?” I was skeptical about answering because honestly I didn’t know how he would react

“Well then, I guess it’s time to make myself very clear. We are together, and people that are together don’t leave. You don’t wanna be with me right now, and that’s fine. But we are dating. Shit at this point we might as well be married. Because I love you, not only that but I’m in love with you. I think about you all day, and when I sleep I literally fucking dream about you. I needed you, so I got you.”

There was an extremely long silence after that.

‘If I were still that young and romantic teenage girl the words themselves would’ve made me swoon. But i’m not dumb and young anymore, I know men are dangerous and see women and people like me as trophies to just sit on a shelf to collect dust, only pulling them out when they want to.

But apparently I am still dumb. Why did I even do this to myself or him? He’s clearly insane and something I did just set him completely off.’

I had no words to say. Not only has anyone ever said anything remotely similar like that to me but even if they had I would still have no clue what to say. The only thing I could think was:

‘Should I hang up?’

“I know you fuckin heard me. I love you, and there’s nothing you can do or I can do to make me stop. Now please, stop being difficult and just open the door baby.” He started aggressively but ended with a soft serenading tone

“Wha-.” You couldn’t even finish before you heard it

It being the sound of a knock at the door.

[mla0]

looks at you. i want to hear about your different iteration things au concept thing for shaun,. blinks eye.

WEEEE

so for the first iteration of the andersens i used the last name warren, so shaun and michael warren because i just like that surname lol. i'm not sure if they would have been in fairmount (probably would've), but either way they definitely knew the mining town four. the clock was ground zero for why they were both admitted, because the mental effects of it lingering around greatly hurt them both and made them act out in their own ways. i think shaun was close with vinny and steph, and michael was close with evan. shaun and jeff are frienemies in the kind of sibling-esque "id kill for you but id also bury you alive for a saltine cracker" way. also it's a personal headcanon of mine that shaun really, really does not like corenthal, and even across iterations that trait sticks even if she doesn't know why (in my personal headcanon, doc gave her preferential treatment over michael and it pissed her off so bad the anger stuck across all the iterations.)

throughout the iterations i think entities like habit would be more in the background, but would sometimes be there, oftentimes to force the two apart. so throughout the generations, you'll see them slowly becoming more and more distant, because habit, the man in the suit, whatever, all thrive off of isolating people as much as possible so they're easier to manipulate or kill later. the two figuring out how to rejoin and work together is paramount, but it gets harder every time.

the other main iteration i focus on would be in the princeton era, and in this one her iteration is named esther. the name means north star, and i think she'd possibly choose it because of vinny for obvious reasons. their last name is korbel, so michael and esther korbel are their names. anyways, in my interpretation she tried to outrun her responsibilities the moment she was old enough, by going off to work in remote and often dangerous places (think oil rigs, firetowers, things where you're far away from everyone else) because her hope is that she can outrun slenderman. she even leaves the country for long periods of time and doesn't really have anyone to lean on, which she did on purpose.

esther and michael in this era hadn't been forcefully separated and were actually really close as kids/younger teens, but they grew apart over time and they hadn't talked in years because esther grew more and more detached from other people. michael took this personally of course and is constantly trying to figure out where she is, but he eventually resigns that she was probably killed by the man in the suit. this isn't the case, though. esther also ended up transitioning when she was away, using the remote workplaces and fact that basically nobody knows her to her advantage. she doesn't care if people are shitty to her on an oil rig, they're too busy getting decompression sickness anyways. she tries to tough everything out but it wears her down more than she'd admit, and has a hard time keeping her resolve and not contacting michael.

it's not that esther dislikes him, quite the opposite actually. kind of like michael in mla0, she has this idea that it's mostly after her or is somehow her own fault, so staying far away from michael will keep him safer. it's self-centered, but michael didn't talk too much about the man in childhood (because he also thought it'd keep his sibling safe) so she wrongly assumes she's patient zero in the family and the two never communicated about this. eventually, something goes wrong at work and she finally starts accepting the situation and meets people like vinny (who i think would be a close friend, i love when shaun and vinny have a dynamic) her and michael see each other again... only for her to realize michael doesn't recognize her after she disappeared and transitioned so long ago. she's terrified of him finding out because this is like, the 1980s, and she doesn't know how michael would take her being trans. even though she's almost entirely certain he wouldn't mind, she still doesn't want to ruin the time they has left, because at this point she's realized they're probably doomed anyways.

she tries to use this to her advantage; she helps michael out a ton without getting too emotionally close. she becomes dangerously obsessed with trying to understand what the entities around her are and what they can do, which only makes her more distant and worries the hell out of vinny as she slips deeper into it. she practically self sabotages and gets more and more unhinged as she dives headfirst into danger with little regard for much else. in the end michael ends up being killed by habit (?) while she's trying to save him, and she makes one last ditch attempt to kill whatever this monster is that she can't comprehend. she puts up a good fight and gets closer than she ever has before thanks to what she's learned, but well, it's habit. she never really stood a chance, and she dies regretting all the things she never told her brother

[skzloversblogsposts]

HOUSEMATES [k.s.m] [f][m] MDNI***

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿

Warnings: cursing , smut , alludes to sex

Content: moving out for the first time is hard but it’s even harder when your apartment seems to be double booked and that too with a man like Kim seungmin

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿︵‿

“Yes mom I’ve checked everything it’s safe don’t worry… no I haven’t met my neighbors I just got here- yes I know -I will “ you spoke as you walked the hallway of the apartment complex , it was your first time moving out and the nerves and tension was high not for just you but for your parents too “ mom it’s fine - yes I’ll show you what it looks like when I move in “ you said approaching the elevator “ hold the lift please” you called out phone pressed to your ear as you scrambled with your box waving whoever was in the elevator to keep it open .

You smile curtly at the man in the lift thanking him for holding it open for you , he was handsome to say the least , brown hair , glasses that fell just on the bridge of his nose and pretty hands however you were cut out of your dazed state by your mother screaming at you from the other end of the phone . Your eyes squeezed shut as you moved it further away from your ear her voice booming on the other endangering both you and the man in the elevators hearing

“Yes I get it don’t worry mom it’s going to be fine “ you said rolling your eyes her worry was understandable but it seemed she was pushing it a bit too far teetering on the end of being overly worried ,you sighed listening to her ramble about inexpensive markets near you and places that sold fresh vegetables as the elevator stopped on your floor you walked out first the man shortly following behind you .

Weird you thought probably just a coincidence but one too many turns later leading you both to the same door proved that this was indeed not a coincidence. Apartment 32D that’s what it said on your key and so did it on his , you stared at him in awe “ I uh rented out apartment 32. “ you said watching his confused face grow even more confused “ I rented apartment 32 D too …” He said showing you his Keys .

The landlord waved you both off telling you to just settle and work something out , live togther or don’t stay here at all she didn’t really care but neither you nor seungmin could afford to live elsewhere so it was decided that you and Kim seungmin would share the apartment for as long as your lease held up . Kim seungmin wasn’t a terrible housemate , he was clean and neat , often did the grocery shopping making sure to stock up on snacks you like and doing his own laundry, his only downfall was his snarky personality that he seemed to let flow so freely . It started off with small remarks , funny ones really but soon grew to absolutely annoy you leaving you with no resolve . “ Seungmin can you take out the trash “ you called from your room hoping he was somewhere in the apartment “ it’s Thursday “ you bellowed” we can’t miss trash day again “ you said ensuring your camera and microphone was muted during your online lecture “ Kim seungmin “ you whined “ I know you’re free “ you said now trying to Stick your head out the side of the door but being met with no avail.

You stood up walking out clad in your sleep shorts and sweater finding a very comfortable seungmin perched on the couch bowl of cereal in one hand tv remote in the other playing the latest reruns of some soap opera he was way too invested in . You sighed snatching the remote from his hand “ are you deaf or are you just ignoring me “ you started . His eyes never leaving the tv as he replied “ I’m busy “ .. busy? Busy was the last thing he was distressed tshirt , messy hair and pajama pants didn’t seem very busy .

“Seungmin it’s Thursday please take the trash out I’m in the middle of class “ you whined stomping around like a kid throwing a tantrum “ not my problem “ he replied in a taunting tone , your ears perked up at the mention of your name from you lecturer dashing to your room leaving seungmin plopped infront of the tv . You huffed and heaved as you pulled the large trash bag out of the apartmyfoor and too the shoot in the hall, dusting your hands off it was finally done , all the whining was for nothing seeing you had to do it yourself , you approached the apartment door twisting the door knob only to be met with retaliation as Your body bounced back from the force … locked , it was locked “ SEUNGMIN “ you howled fists clanking agaisnt the wooden door , seungmin stuck his head out the gap only big enough for just that as he smiled at you

“Something wrong” he asked flashing you a smile as your eyebrows knitted together “ seungmin let me in I’m not even dressed properly “ you said watching as his eyes raked over your legs landing on your thighs “you look fine “ he said smiling brightly before resuming to lock the door “seungmin please “ you begged as you noticed the elevator bell dinging off loading people into the building

You smiled awkwardly greeting the people who eyed you up and down like a charity case “ I live here “ you said smiling politely after being met with a scoff from one of the residents . After much retaliation seungmin caved and opened the door “ do you have any idea how embarrassing that was “ you started off watching as he walked away with you trailing behind him “ they looked at me like I’m crazy “ you said watching as he resumed his comfortable position on the couch looking oh so cuddly and oh so soft . Stupid seungmin. Stupid handsome seungmin . “ serves you right for wearing those slutty shorts around the house “ he said eyes never leaving your thighs “slutty !? These aren’t even that bad “ you said feighing an exaggerated sigh . Seungmin stood up inching closer to you watching as you walked pressing your back Into the wall “ do you think they’re appropriate” he asked pulling on the band of your shorts as his fingers trailed against the flesh of your hips “ I mean they are really short “ he spoke bitting his bottom lip watching the way your thighs caused the bottoms to roll up as you squeezed them together , seungmin backed away leaving you pressed against the wall “take Keys with you next time “ he said walking into his room leaving you plastered and flustured agaisnt the wall .Seungmin always bugged you he made it his personal mission to annoy you at any given moment throughout the day regardless of the circumstances. Breakfast he was there meddling with the settings in the toaster ulitmately leading to you burning your toast tutting at you when you sulked “poor thing , can’t even use the toaster right can you “ , during your class he was there rearranging the apartment causing loud scraps and grunts to be heard in the background of your lectures usually leaving you to be met with a sweaty seungmin “ you’re staring “ he’d say as he collected the bottom of his shirt to wipe his forehead leaving his tummy on display and ..even when you showered seungmin was there running the hot water in the kitchen draining it from the bathroom leaving you’re surrounded by spurts of ice cold water “ be nice and maybe I’ll stop if you beg well enough ” became the sentence he raked through your brain often leaving you in the cold water longer just so he could hear you beg on the verge of tears as you pleaded with him. Seungmin loves annoying you it was his favorite task of the day that and his trips to the coffee shops downtown in winter , he couldn’t find joy like that anywhere else although it confused him as to why you never caught on , surely you didn’t think he was doing this for nothing? I mean you couldn’t be that dense .Today was your final straw after letting the hair dye you’ve been talking about recently sit on the roots of your hair in an attempt for a touch up to your terrible dye job courtesy of seungmin you thought you would be in the clear for a nice hot shower , you stepped in rising the product out of your hair watching as it disappeared down the drain when the pipes rustled, cold water overcoming your body ruining your once hot shower surrounding you in waves of cold . You cursed out grabbing your towel wrapping it around you as you stormed into the kitchen “ seungmin what the fuck” you said watching the culprit leaning against the counter top as if he was innocent , the reminents of water dripped down your legs , and your arms leaving your skin with a sheen in the light surrendering seungmin completely speechless . “Can I take one fucking shower where you don’t fuck shit up” you said your tone harsh , you were angry, who wouldn’t be . Seungmin tilted his head in confusion he never meant to make you angry you never did get angry before was this your end point?did you hate him?

Seungmin couldn’t cast away the way you looked at him earlier eyes dark and angry as your hands balled into fists , he thought you looked delicateable , skin so soft and hair perfectly coating your shoulders but he couldn’t help but feel bad , laying in bed that night restless and upset at his own actions and what they caused you , lugging himself out of bed he walked to your room door knocking briefly to be met with a groggy “ come in”

Followed by a “ it’s 3 in the morning seungmin” as he waddled towards your bed sitting on the edge of it

“ I’m sorry “ he started the words seemed so foreign to his mouth that he almost couldn’t bare to say it “ I’m sorry I took things too far “ you sat up rubbing the sleep from you eyes , your outburst long forgotten as you looked at him confused “ what..” you mumbled your words slurring together “ what are you talking about “ you said squinting at him in the dark trying to make ,

Out the features on his face “I upset you and I’m sorry “ he said head held in his hands as if he committed the biggest crime ever and was now repenting for his sins you sighed crawling over to him gently placing your hand on his back” I was upset but I’m okay now you don’t have to apologize “ you said drawing light circles on the expanse of his back ignnightinv the skin underneath him in a wave of warmth as you touched him “it’s not yn” you shifted closer to him “ it’s not I do these things because I like you “ “I’m an idiot “ he sighed

Rubbing his temples as your hand stilled “ you like me ?” You asked the words coming out of your mouth hushed and quiet barely heard by either of you .seungmin tensed up he let it slip he didn’t plan on letting it slip but it just flowed so freely out of his mouth that he now had no where to escape to “yea I do a lot actually since I first saw you to be honest “ he said now smiling at you , he might as well commit worst that could happen is you moving out calling him a creep and never wanting to see him again

You were lost for words all these months you thought seungmin bugged you just because he didn’t like you but here he was hunched over your bed in what looked like the comfiest sweater hair tussled and his hands slightly sweaty , you laughed , a smile tugging on your lips as you threw your head back . Seungmin looked up at you a pained look on his face , we’re you laughing at him? At his confession he couldn’t believe it , his eyes searched wildly across your face for any signs of interpretation as to why you were laughing

You wiped a tear from your eye looking at seungmin throwing your arms around his neck engulfing him in a hug “ you’re right you are an idiot Kim seungmin” you said holding him as close as you could “ I thought you hated me , I thought I was going crazy for liking you I can’t believe it I was so dense “ you said watching as seungmins cheeks coated with a light flush “ you like me too?” He asked his eyes wide

You nodded cupping his face between you hands “ I like you too … a lot actually “ you said kissing the expanse of his forehead as his eyes fluttered shut . Seungmins breathe ragged , unstableness taking over as he stares into your eyes , they were warm and inviting under the blue hue of the moon that crept in through your curtains , he smiles bring your face closer to his latching his lips on to yours moving them across the witdth of your neck , your head fell back his lips pressed against the sensitive skin too soft causing your brain to short circuit . Your hands gently threaded through his hair as he placed his mark on you moving and alternating between your shoulders and your collar bones “ min” you sighed basking in the feeling of his lips he hummed against your skin the feeling overwhelming you as you held him closer his hands running across your thigh gripping and squeezing as much as he could .

His hands hovered over your core , the wet patch catching his attention seungmin slipped his hand between your thighs , your arousal coating his fingers as he laid his fingers on your clothed covered clit . You moaned out seungmins presence engulfing you completely leaving you feeling like he was everywhere but no where all at once “please ..” your words were mumbled into the darkness of your room as seungmin crawled between your legs “please what .. use your words or have you forgotten how to “ he teased placing a kiss at your hip before sliding your shorts off of your legs discarding them somewhere on the floor. “ please touch .. “ you spoke breathless and panting from the feeling of his breath against your wet core he hummed “ poor thing you’re so gone you can’t even form a proper sentence “ he said watching your lust filled eyes glisten in the light . “Don’t worry ..I’ll take good care of you “

[starlazergazer]

Hii!! I’m the anon who asked if u had an ao3, and I’m sooo glad I can have all your fics in one PDF thank u so much 🙏 I can quickly pressed the download button so fast. youre genuinely one of my fav anakin fic writers in the entire galaxy (far far away). Your writing is so so gorgeous and complex, and it just feels soooo real—how each person has their own depth—so much thought is put into every word and how it’s framed.

I just read your latest fic, Separated, and my god I SOBBED. It was SO good. I was listening to sad songs too, to get more into the mood, and it made me cry even harder. My heart just dropped out of my body when Reader and Anakin were saying their last words towards each other through the call: they were so emotionally close but so physically far from each other. How they were imagining a different life where everything was more softer and happier, that living handle their souls more gently, when in reality one was killing her, and the other was walking towards a path of destruction? AARAAGGH IM GOING CRAZY WITH YOUR WRITING (COMPLIMENT). I can’t wait to see the second part and how you plan to execute the follow up.

Btw. Do you have any tips on how you can finish writing stories? You write so much and it’s all such high quality. How do you do it? I have so many ideas but I never actually commit to it. I have this idea where Reader is also on par with Anakin’s skills as a mechanic except she gets extreme motion sickness, which I think would be so funny considering she’s good at building ships but not flying them.

(I really hope you’re okay with me posting this I know your first message was sent anonymously so I wasn’t sure but if you’re not definitely just let me know and I’ll get rid of it) but Oh my god I sobbed reading this 😭. Genuinely this is the biggest compliment I’ve ever received and it means so much to me I’m positively overflowing right now and a little upset I cannot find the words to properly express how much this means to me. I already go back through some of the messages Ive received periodically as a little pick-me-up but I already know this one will be revisited weekly it just means so much to me the way you’ve picked up on everything I’ve tried so hard to do well in my writing making the dialog and situations and characters feel real and complex and messy ugghhhhh I love you so much this means the world 🫶🏻

As far as writing tips for finishing stories I have many cause it’s definitely something I struggle with all the time lol! I’d say the biggest thing for me is to focus on just getting something down rather than finishing a certain work. At any one time I have four or five word documents open on my computer because I’m regularly only writing a scene or a piece of dialog or literally just an idea. A lot of the time I get halfway through something and decide I hate it but keep it there anyways. What usually ends up happening though is I take ideas or scenes from all the different pieces and drop them into my “main story” if I think they fit well so it all works out in the end but just writing (even if it’s not related even remotely to what you feel like you “should” write) is ultimately what’s important.

I also regularly skip around when I’m writing. I find I like writing the big plot points or bits of dialogue the most so a lot of the time I write those first then fill in the gaps later. Finishing a story is a lot less daunting when you already have all of the big pieces in place and just need a few tiny bridges to bring everything together.

Lastly I would say again just get something down on the paper. I’ve written a lot of really bad stuff lol and sometimes I can feel it while I’m writing it and there’s a part of me that wants to just delete it and start over but having the ideas down on the page is always 100% better than having nothing and editing the crap out of what you already have is way easier than starting over from scratch.

Anyways that’s probably way more than what you wanted lol but I really hope it helps! I think just remember this is supposed to be fun, if you’re getting frustration or exasperation out of it more than anything totally feel free to take a step back. I’m known to go MIA for months at a time cause I have periods where I just am not feeling it and forcing myself through it does nothing for anyone.

Seriously though thank you thank you thank you I’m so absolutely overjoyed that you like my writing enough to want to keep it in any form it means the absolute world to me! Also good luck with your potential fic! Tag me if/when you finish it! I’ve been wanting to do a mechanic reader fic forever but never gotten far enough into actually planning it out to start writing anything so I’d love to see your take on it

[burning-basilisk]

I am the entire IT department of this place.

I am Help Desk.

I am Sysadmin.

I am executive management. Mainly because both of my actual bosses (On-site General Manager and remote corporate overlord) have no hard technical background. I was a software engineer for 7 years before this. And holy shit the whiplash.

My formal title is "IT Operations Manager", but I have nobody to manage. It's only me. I have complete authority over the IT infrastructure and am spending like 30% of my time doing help desk work. One minute I am setting top-level security policy, and the next, I am using a knife to pry an ethernet cable out of a laptop because apparently using the plastic tab to pull it out isn't intuitive for everyone.

I have learned a hell of a lot in the last few months.

But the thing that inspired this post, that I really want to talk about, but am struggling to find people to discuss with...

If I am walking across the facility to deal with an issue, there's like a 30% chance that someone will walk up to me with another issue that I need to deal with. I haven't implemented a help desk ticketing system yet. Haven't had the space.

But if I happen to be exhausted or in a bad mood when I respond to them, they will be hesitant to tell me when things break. This makes my job worse. I am not THEIR manager, but I'm still one of the Top Brass in this place. It doesn't matter how soft of a person I actually am, the workers here still don't want to upset me, and will swerve the hell away from me if they think they might be.

Even if I didn't care about being liked and was totally Machiavellian about how I treat people at work, this is bad.

I've read so much about the emotional labor of customer service.

Turns out, management has emotional labor, too. Except here, nobody will tell me when I'm being unapproachable. And it's also nobody else's problem.

If I can't be consistently friendly to the people around me, they will be disinclined to communicate with me. If cracks in the infrastructure appear, I won't know until something catches fire.

I cannot safely express my frustration or even exhaustion to *anyone* here, without making my job harder, regardless of how good of a rapport I may have with them.

I am the only computer professional in the building. Even the most well-meaning instance of "He is tired and overworked, let's not put more on his plate" could keep me ignorant of an impending disaster.

The entire intranet got completely fucked because someone plugged both ports of an IP phone into the same dumb switch, and I was up until 3AM trying to figure out what the fuck happened and I still haven't had the space to properly research how to overhaul this place's hackjob of a network out of the stone age. But they don't want to bother me with silly shit like helping people move cubicles when the job I was actually hired to do was implement automation into this manufacturing process.

My Corporate Overlords swear that they are working on hiring me help. But maybe I'm not squeaky enough of a wheel to get some grease.

/rant

[moirailslut]

Buy Mattresses Online

Buying a mattress may seem like a very easy thing to do at first, but once you start looking for the right one you will discover that it’s a much learn more harder task than you previously thought. Finding the mattress that can give you a good night’s sleep requires much thought and effort.

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Some people find it very hard to buy mattresses online, because they feel it is something that needs to be tested physically, but that is not necessarily true. Besides, mattresses and beds are a long term purchase, so it’s not something you’re likely to do very often. By the time that one needs to buy a bed or mattress again, the market may have already changed from the ones you knew before, so it is very hard to know which one is the right type for you, just by going into a physical shop. However, when you buy beds online you will find many benefits, such as the availability of user reviews and bed specifications to guide you. With this, you will find that is actually quite easy to buy beds online or to buy mattresses online.

Memory foam mattresses are a special kind and they are truly worth your budget. It can calm your entire body once you lie on this mattress after a very long and tiring day of work. It is available in different sizes such as Queen, Full, King and California King Size. Branded memory foam mattresses allow you to enjoy the comfort that you are looking for, and they provide relaxing benefits that help in eliminating shoulder pain or other pains through their unique comfort system. There are different types that you can choose from whether you buy mattresses online or go to a brick and mortar shop, such as:

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The mattress is an important part of your life because this is where you can find comfort and relaxation at the end of the day, which is why you need to invest in a high quality, comfortable and durable mattress. Online shops selling mattresses provide better deals compared to brick and mortar shopping malls and boutiques. Land based shopping venues have lots of expenses, such as employee salaries, electricity and water bill, taxes, rental and many more. All of these expenses are also being passed on to their customers. With online shopping all of these expenses are reduced or even eradicated and you get the quality you truly need.

[kainzalin]

I just want to scream into the void.

I don't care who reads and who doesn't.

With so much happening around the world, I feel my own issues are insignificant, but they are weighing me down now and I feel like to scream them out.

I am not asking for help, definitely not asking for petty. I am not seeking advice either. Just leave me the fuck alone, this is my wall and I can post what I want.

It goes something like this. I live in a warzone. Not as hot as some of the more pressing ones globally, but it's affecting my life significantly, I am not going to delve into that right now. My country was nice once upon a time, I had dreams before, but they are a little more than a delusion now.

The past half a decade I have been trying to get out. I managed to save some cash and applied for a visa, which is growing harder over time. I left last year but couldn't get work due to my visa limitation. Still, I tried looking for a way, I took interest in remote work as it won't be restricted by country, but it seems complicated for some reason. A bit hard without even access to a bank account.

Next step, I looked into online retailing. Starting my own business sounds promising. If I can just make a few hundred dollars a month, I can at least keep myself afloat. It had its complications, especially that I had no past experience. I had a few hundreds saved up for it, not much but it should work.

Sometime later my brother contacted me, he has been trying to convince me to return to the country ever since I left. Even before that he tried to convince me to stay behind.

This time he told me about this business he's getting into and that he needed my help. The idea sounded promising, definitely larger income than what I was aiming for, and I wasn't going anywhere on my own. But it sounded too good to be true. Nothing wrong with the job itself, it's just that it requires some documents and I know the bureaucracy back home is unstable and what would take mere days and weeks can turn into months or even years. I expressed that and he assured me that this is different and that it will be sorted quickly. I must return home immediately as it's urgent and he doesn't want to waste a day once his documents are in order.

Fast forward one week short of 4 months later and I am just sitting at home, unemployed, my cash is running out, I don't have the means to go back, and somehow I am the bad guy for being upset with my brother who's working so hard and is doing his best and he merely wanted to help.

Anyway, an online friend of mine recently convinced me to attend therapy. Long overdue but it's nearly non existent here and I couldn't afford it when I was out. My friend arranged for me a therapist from their home country and even offered to pay the first few sessions.

It went well, I appreciate it. But my recent self report test indicated that my DASS score was through the roof, with extremely severe across all three categories. My therapist advised me to obtain medication which should help boost my mood. The problem is, I will need a local psychiatrist to prescribe them for me and I don't know where to find one, let alone afford their service. Of course my family would brush it off and suggest alternative solutions such as the good old "Just keep yourself busy, once you get a job you will be in a good mood".

Anyway, I am not trying to make a point, this is just a scribble on my own wall. Don't respond, don't interact, don't share. Just leave me the fuck alone.