#and protect my loved ones including the family members i have here now
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im watchin howl's moving castle rn and theres like. a newfound softness that i only really realized now that im older and have been thinking about families in the future.
sullivan's little helpers/apprentices all had the same blonde bob haircut that howl had in the beginning, meaning that sullivan makes them all have that haircut, and how even after all those years howl had already ran away from her, he still wasn't as free as he wanted to be, clinging and insisting on maintaining the blonde bob hairstyle to the point where he had grown to dislike how his hair naturally looked.
but after sophie came around, things started shaping up to resemble a comforting environment, one where they could have a proper breakfast, and a place tidy enough to not have so much unnecessary clutter around, and how unintentionally sophie had made him grow accustomed to how looked without keeping up a particular facade, and how things genuinely became more homey and warm because of her.
now the main reason why i made this post was when i realized that howl and sophie had made a found family, and to adjust to it properly howl had moved them into a new home where everyone would be properly accommodated, not to mention how it was a place that is deeply sentimental and valuable to sophie. this and the fact that howl took the time to give her some gifts too, to show just how much he appreciated everything that sophie has done for him.
it just. it just made me cry a bit. especially knowing what was going to happen next. he was willing to settle down and care for this family he never really expected to have, even despite all its faults and problems, and it really just made me think about the future. it made me hopeful about the prospect of caring for a family, and how i'd strive to emulate howl's kindness and care for the people close to him.
i think that such a thought is beautiful, but it all the more makes the threat of war and calamity feel so terrifying, yet despite it the will to ensure that your loved ones are safe are what would keep one's motivation strong to persist against all odds. just as howl and sophie have grown to truly value someone irreplaceable, one would strive to do everything they can to make sure that they will all get back safe together.
#im not tagging this i just got emotional#isnt it weird? im only 20 and yet im already thinking about the prospect of a family and how i want to be able to properly provide#and protect my loved ones including the family members i have here now#before i used to be so apathetic#and having a happy n fulfilled family just seemed like a fantasy that couldnt be true#but just cause a family is happy and fulfilled doesnt mean they dont have problems. doesnt mean that there wont be rough patches at times#howl's movin castle showed me that.#that even despite all the problems. it's never too late to try and make things better#anyway im gettin incredibly sidetracked im gonna continue watchin the movie lmfao
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Trip Up - Valet!SimonRiley and Maid!Reader
The abbey was on alert today. A telegram from the Lord Price's sister stating she would be visiting along with members of the Crawley family who had moved into the village.
This included the new heir to Downton Abbey Matthew Crawley, John's third cousin, who was rumored to marry Lady Mary, John's oldest daughter.
'I can't stand the thought of my only purpose being to marry. To be thrown at every heir to Downton so that the money stays in the family,' Mary said in frustration, putting on her earrings as you did her hair, 'All I want is to be chosen for me any only that.'
You nodded, putting the last of the beaded pins in her hair. She had chosen a lavender skirt with a cream blouse for the day, finished with a simple cardigan.
'It just feels so belittling. What do you think Y/N?' She asked, looking thoughtfully at you through the mirror.
You gave her a gentle smile, 'I agree m'lady. If it were my choice, I would indeed marry for love. It's more important than most things.'
'And of course position. I could never forget that! This new heir is apparently quite middle class and I just won't have that!'
You couldn't help but sigh at her words.
Mary was a kind young and beautiful lady, but at times had a cold heart and hard exterior to protect it, which included a cruel nature to those she despised.
'How is that new valet doing? Mr Riley wasn't it?'
'Oh, he's quite settled in m'lady, now that it has been a few months,' You said as you moved around the room, clearing and folding clothes away to where they belonged, 'I think he's still shaken the staff up but much better than it was previously.'
Mary tapped her perfume to her wrists, saying, 'Thank goodness, I felt terrible for Papa. He talks about Mr Riley like a dear old friend, it would be a shame if he doesn't feel welcome here, even as a valet.'
'Agreed, now I should probably head down. Will that be all m'lady?'
'Yes, thank you Y/N.'
You made your way down to the servants hall, putting away anything that needed cleaning from the daughter's rooms. Before too long, the staff were rounded up at the stairs, Mr Garrick doing final inspections of uniforms before we went up to meet our guests.
'We should go out to greet them all, now be on your best behavior. I'll have nothing less!' Mr Garrick said, the younger staff nodding nervously while others remained silent.
'Remember to not go running off William, I'll need your help with the bags,' Graves muttered to the youngest and newest of the footmen.
Mr Riley who was standing at the base of the stairs turned to him. 'I'm happy to assist you if needed.'
'No need! Don't more mistakes do we Mr Riley?' Graves was quick to quip back. You couldn't help but shake your head, following the other maids up the stairs.
The staff were lined up at the front of the incredibly beautiful house as the cars rolled in one by one through the gates, coming to a halt just in front of the tall double doors.
Lord John pushed forward first, her Ladyship Liliana close behind him to also greet Matthew. From the look of him, he looked like a kind man. Young, blond and blue-eyed just like his mother, Isobel, who followed close behind him. Older, a little grey-haired, but back straight with a smile.
The daughters greeted their aunts happily, while awkwardly greeting the newcomers. After brief chatter was shared amongst the family, they began to move into the house slowly.
Suddenly a scuffle erupted, the maids gasping as your eyes turned to see Mr Riley crash hard onto the pebbled ground, stones flying about messily and, to your horror, his mask.
You glanced up and saw Graves, an ugly smirk on his face as he looked down on the valet, his foot strangely kicked out in place before walking towards the back entrance.
'Riley, are you alright?'
You looked to see John coming to his side, grabbing the mask from the ground and handing it to him. The rest of the family watched on in shock.
'I am my lord, my apologies,' You heard Mr Riley grumble, keeping his face down as he placed his mask back on properly.
When his lordship had turned back to usher his family inside, Johnny, who stood tall at the door awaiting their entry, gave you a nod which you returned.
As the staff quickly dispersed, you went to Mr Riley's side, gently pressing a hand to his shoulder.
'Here, let me help you, Mr Riley,' You quietly said, grabbing his arm and slowly assisting him until he was steadily back on his feet.
You shook off the pebbles and dust caught onto his suit jacket and pants. 'There, much better–'
'Don't!' He suddenly snapped, slapping your hand away.
You gasped, taking a step away. Though his face was covered, there was a deep anger in Mr Riley's eyes that you had never seen before. It almost frightened you.
Mr Riley froze, taking in your change of demeanour. With a sigh, he uttered so quietly you almost missed it, 'Please don't pity me Miss ... I don't need it.'
He pushed past you roughly, his loud footsteps quickly becoming distant against the pebbled walkway as he left you behind.
The day continued as usual except, you noticed very quickly, the distinct absence of Mr Riley for the rest of the day. You had overheard Mr Garrick say he had taken poorly and couldn't continue to work.
Like bees that had caught the honey, the staff buzzed excitedly with the sudden gossip of his possible resignation or firing. Though the staff had calmed down since his arrival, it didn't change their stance that he didn't deserve the job.
It made you furious. Why should a man who had been at the house for a few months be let go just because of a small mishap? Something that wasn't even his fault. Nothing even happened!
Soon drinks for the family were complete after their meal, and dinner was being served in the servant's hall, but there was still no sign of Mr Riley.
After nibbling at your meal and failing to work up an appetite yourself, you found a tray and dished up some stew and some hot bread that had been served.
'What are you doing love?' You looked up to see Mrs Patmore enter the kitchens, clearly having finished her dinner.
'Oh, I was just making up a plate for Mr Riley, him not being well enough to join us. You won't mind Ms Laswell?' You addressed the head housekeeper who had appeared behind Mrs Patmore.
She nodded with a smile, 'Of course, just this once. The poor man has been through enough in one day.'
With a nod, you finished piling up the tray before making your way carefully through the corridors of the attics where the servants lived in and at end of the corridor, a light shone from beneath a door.
Making your way over, you peeked into the room. Through the mirror that hung on the cupboard, you could see sitting on the bed there sat the shaking silhouette of Mr Riley, and in the quiet, the soft sobbing emitted from him.
You couldn't help but feel your heart break at the site. Taking a step back, you cleared your throat. 'Mr Riley? Are you there?'
A shuffle was heard from within the room, footsteps approaching before the door opened to reveal Mr Riley. His eyes were swollen and red, his hair dishevelled and his shoulders tense.
You gave him a reassuring smile. 'I brought some dinner up, in case you were hungry.'
Immediately he deflated at the sight of you, eyes softened as he took in the tray of food neatly placed. 'That's very kind Miss. Even after what I did to you earlier ... you are still so generous.'
'It's nothing really,' You placed the tray in his hands which he placed off to the side, looking back to you.
'But it's the very opposite of nothing. I-I really am sorry for this morning, that was very unkind of me Miss.'
'No need for apologies Mr Riley,' You said, trying to keep your voice steady, 'You've been wronged since you arrived here and I hate to see you like this. Please don't let them drag you down. You are so much stronger than they are.'
He sighed heavily, eyes shying away from yours, leaning against the door frame. 'I hate to admit it ... it's very humiliating. Couldn't stomach any more of it.'
You shook your head firmly, stepping closer to him. 'You shouldn't be made to feel that way. Be proud of being here, John–I mean ... Lord Price chose you to be here for a reason. You've earned your place and you shouldn't have to hide or be ashamed.'
Mr Riley looked down at you, his eyes finally meeting yours and scanning your face. He clearly could see the tears in your eyes and heard the tremble in your voice.
'Why do you do this Miss?'
You were stunned, almost at a loss for words. Couldn't help but get lost in the beauty of his eyes, a thousand words and emotions even in silence. So instead, stepping even closer, chest to chest with him, you carefully reached for his hand. You felt him stiffen beneath your gentle touch momentarily before he allowed you to clasp your hands with his.
'You don't deserve to be treated as such. I don't like to see it,' You said, looking up into his eyes.
Not wanting to encroach on him any longer, you slowly pulled away, unable to hold back a small smile when you felt Mr Riley hold tight to your hand just a little longer before letting it drop from his grip.
The next morning the servant's hall was busy with the staff filing in, breakfast of hot porridge with honey and buttered toast was served by Daisy and Mrs Patmore.
As Mr Garrick sat down, allowing everyone else to follow suit, Mr Riley appeared at the entrance to the hall and you couldn't help but smile, ignoring the scowl of some of the other staff.
'Ah, Mr Riley!' Ms Laswell greeted as she passed on bowls of porridge down the table, 'Good to see you up and about!'
'Indeed Ms Laswell, can't keep me down too long,' He muttered, looking straight at you as he did.
'That's good to hear, come and get yourself some breakfast we have a busy day ahead of ourselves!'
He nodded, making his way around the table and taking a seat beside you. And as a bowl of porridge was placed in front of you, you felt the fleeting caress of his gloved hand across your own beneath the table.
Call of Duty Masterlist a/n: I'm on a roll I tell you! And I love writing for these two.
@lostintransist @teapartydreams
#simon riley imagine#simon riley x reader smut#simon ghost riley x reader#simon ghost riley imagines#simon ghost riley imagine#call of duty imagines#call of duty imagine#cod imagines#cod imagine#cod x reader#cod#cod x you#tf 141 x reader#tf 141#tf 141 x you#john price x reader#poly!141 x reader#poly 141 x reader#poly 141#simon ghost x you#simon ghost riley x you#simon ghost x reader#ghost x reader#soap x reader#gaz x reader#simon riley x you#simon riley x reader#ghost x you#johnny soap mctavish x reader
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A DC X DP #33
InDependent Together
Imagine dis…
I’ve seen the interactions between Danny and the Batfam. I have seen him have either good or bad interactions with different DC characters, whether he is in his ghost form or not. I’ve seen how Danny is either angry at the world or angry at his brother aka Damian for killing him all for the title of the heir, and how happy and relieved he is to find his brother outside of the reach of the demon head.
But I haven’t seen much of Danny and a semi-redempted Vlad in a toxic relationship.
…
Gotham, a place where the worst of the worst came to live. Where gunshots and screams of murder are something out of the norm. A group of vigilantes made their way to the heart of the city, where despite all of its dirt and grimness, they still tried and loved this city.
Here comes Danny Fenton and Vlad Masters, who moved in the same neighborhood as the Wayne’s. Now Danny is under the guardianship of Vlad, why you ask? It's because a different tragedy occurred. If the explosion at the Nasty Burger was caused by his cheating on a test, now it was something so mundane that Danny didn’t know if Clockwork didn’t see the event due to it. His aunt also died in another freak accident and he sometimes wondered if he tempted faith too much ever since his accident.
Having no choice he was placed with Vlad as his legal guardian, he wasn’t too keen on the idea but he saw Vlad slowly trying to redeem himself so instead of running away he chose to stay.
…
Vlad is both ecstatic and still in grief at what happened in a month. He was trying to be better, he was making progress to be able to go back to their dynamic when they were still in college. Just maybe this time it will include Danny and Jazz, but tragedy stuck, after months of hard work and compromises it all went down the drain. He was in the middle of his grief when a social worker knocked on his door to inquire about Daniel’s guardianship, which stunned Vlad because he would have thought that the boy had already run away or told the social worker himself that he didn’t want to be placed with him.
The social worker informed Vlad that Danny’s aunt had met her demise as a form of house invasion gone wrong. With no one else to care for the teen, the social worker went to the godfather of the child seeing that the teen that they are in charge with seems to be still dissociating ever since they looked for his aunt. Poor kid, the social worker thought, losing all of your family and friends in a single day. They just hoped that the kid would be taken care of and slowly heal with his godfather.
…
They moved across states to heal, to get far away from the town that seemingly only did was to take and take from the two. Vlad is gripping the steering wheel till his knuckles turn white, his obsession, the one he is too afraid of, and his primary. It kept yelling at him at the back of his head. Maddie Fenton, Power & wealth, and lastly Daniel Fenton are the secondary obsessions that he often shows, but he has another obsession a primary one that is something he kept hidden out of fear of being shattered, family, something he thought to create with Maddie back when they were in college. Vlad can feel it, the way his mind and instincts are all yelling, screaming at him to protect the last thread of his sanity and existence who is watching idly at the trees as they drive by.
By all that's left of my sanity, I swear to protect you, Daniel my Little Badger, at any cost. Nothing will stand in the way of keeping you safe.
…
Danny is also recalling past events, despite having protection as his secondary obsession a part of him broke, and he tried to prevent this event in his life. He thought the ghost of time that he saw as a grandfather would have helped him to avoid it. Didn’t he already avoid such tragedy, fight his future self and win? But in the end, it was still meant to be.
So now, his young core latched onto the last remaining member of his known family. If his past self could see him now, he would call him fraternizing with the fruit loop. He didn’t care, just the thought of Vlad just having a mere paper cut made him go near the edge or even turning feral.
With everyone gone, you're all I have left, Vlad. I'll do whatever it takes to keep you safe, no matter how desperate things get, even if I have to turn into something more than Dan.
Both Vlad and Danny’s eyes began to glow an eery shade of blue and red as they both silently swore to themselves to protect the other no matter the cost. Both fell into a deep pit of promises and oaths.
…
The moment they settle down in Gotham Vlad, Vlad controls Daniel’s every movement, constantly controls Danny's life, deciding who he can befriend despite going to Gotham Academy Vlad begins insisting that the kids that attend the school are suddenly not good enough for Danny, something past him would like to have. Where Danny can go, and what Vlad can do to protect Danny from phantom threats emphasizing they now live in Gotham where every step they take is another crime on the tally. As a result, Danny becomes overly reliant on Vlad's advice and is concerned about making decisions without his approval. He puts himself in perilous circumstances to protect Danny, which causes shame and guilt-tripping.
Especially the last time they went out, they were held hostage by the Joker. Thinking that Danny was a Wayne. Vlad immediately went feral, without outing himself, and killed the men who held him down and brutally filled the clown with lead as he dared to hold Danny in such a way that might trigger his past trauma.
..
But Vlad isn't the only one who uses such tactics, Danny also starts to use underhand methods to gain Vlad’s attention and care for himself. Danny manipulates Vlad by stressing his vulnerabilities and emphasizing the necessity for protection. Danny with tears in his eyes recounts Vlad’s past schemes as a means to exploit Vlad's guilt and pity, forcing him to give in to Danny’s demands for attention. Danny instigates crisis circumstances, falsely promises transformation, and presents himself as a victim. Danny began to expect continual attention and validation, leaving Vlad increasingly reliant on being the only one to praise Danny. Finally, Danny dupes Vlad into offering financial assistance by inflating his demands or creating expenses associated with his human activities within their home.
Danny was relieved when he was chosen to be the main hostage instead of Vlad, but the moment Vlad began to go on feral just to save him. Danny’s little heart began to break, is he not strong enough to protect Vlad? What if he broke something… what if he suffered a heart attack?
Thoughts kept spiraling in Danny’s head as he had that vacant look ever since he saw Vlad throw the first punch to the nearest goon.
…
A QUICK FLASHBACK ON THE POV OF THE BATFAM
The Wayne manor began the morning with a buzzing of news that a new family is moving into the same street at Wayne’s Outsiders if you must. At first, they didn’t mind their new neighbors' quietness but something felt wrong every time they went for a walk or near that house, unfortunately, some cases needed their full attention than a quiet family that seemed to keep it to themselves.
It all came crashing down when The Joker, The prince of crime, met Danny, whom he held hostage thinking that he was a new Wayne. Vlad, the defender, and godfather, who was also there, witnessed his only and last godchild being held hostage by something/ someone he has a traumatic response and history. Brutally killed the Joker out of rage, startling even the most sinister corners of Gotham. The Batfamily confronted Vlad at his mansion and began interrogating him that he was dangerous and that Danny could not stay with him.
Danny stood between Vlad and the Batfamily, his ghostly aura radiating protecting energy. Danny, observing this, asked that they stay away from Vlad. The Batclan continued their efforts to reach Danny, bringing in various people to tell him what normal dynamics should be. Alfred, Barbara, Tim, and Jason attempted to relate to him, but Danny rejected them, his ghostly core erupting with intense protectiveness.
…
Vlad watched with triumph and dread, already knowing that Danny's loyalty would lead to a cycle of dependency on him. However, he didn't want to stop, as Danny was with HIM, and he was HIS.
The family of vigilantes, aware of the slow and painful process of breaking the toxic bond with Vlad, continued to reach out, hoping that one day Danny would understand that true family is about love and support.
For the time being, Danny, now Masters, stayed in the shadows of Gotham, imprisoned in his mind and house, both his mind and heart torn between desperate need for Vlad.
…
PS: If someone out there wants to continue or make a fic about this you are free to do so, don’t forget to tag me though.
PPS: Here’s another long one… And I got impatient in posting this one, so enjoy!
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Set Me Free
18+
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Part five
Good Girl Gone Mad
Characters: Min Yoongi as Agust D/Mafia boss, Jung Hoseok as Jack/Concierge, Namjoon/Police detective, Jungkook/Police detective, Park Jimin/thief and gang leader, Taehyung/Mafia member, Paradise owner. Jin/unknown, Busan/Mafia boss.
Pairing: Yoongi x Reader
Warnings: This story contains nsfw content (descriptive blood, gore, etc.) as well as sexual content. Mentions may include violence, consumption of alcohol, explicit sexual interactions, sharp objects, knife play, description of injuries, themes of major horror and also explores obsessive behaviors and codependency, robbery, killing, guns, torturing, fire, toxic yandere men, violence, possessive behaviour, unhealthy relationships.
🩸My master list 🩸
We Go Down Together - Dove Cameron & Khalid
< Previously • Next Chapter >
My mind have been a mess ever since i encountered agust d but that was also the moment i saw a chance to prove my worth at the station and to finally be one of them like Namjoon, it was a chance for me to get the bad guy and that was always my priority ever since i decided to become a police officer. As the days went by i found myself growing more and more impatient. The more my path crossed with Yoongi the more my greed became apparent, meeting Yoongi it was like a fire burning my skin, he brought out the things in me that I never once thought i had it it was uncomfortable to be in such situations I hade found myself to be so easily influenced by his presence that I just simply lost control. It was dangerous to be close to him but now more then ever I had no choice but to stay by his side but being with him i realized a part of me that was living dormant for all these years. I’m going down a path i never once thought considered fallowing and for that reason I’m lost inside this hell by my own choice, i had so much pride of my own morals and achievements when i started working at the station, my beliefs where always to make the world a better place by making the right choices and protecting those who made the same choices. After losing my dad i knew i wanted to fallow the path he did, make the right decisions and help people from the darkness of this world.
But what no one tells you about fallowing the right path is that to be a hero, is to bear the weight trying to bring justice to those who have no power but, you cannot.
Our laws exist to protect us but they are so limited to a point where even if you know who’s the bad guy, without any solid evidence they will just be set free from punishment. The worst part is you know they are going to hurt people again.
I never wanted to be part of this, somehow I’m grateful but at the same time I regret it very deeply all my choices. All it took was one slip and i was in the rabbit hole, that same darkness the people i was supposed to put in jail lived in, sooner or later, we always give in that slip to taste a new world.
I was taught to do the rigt thing and always fallow the rules, with my dad playing the biggest part into this. I know that justice takes time and you can’t always do the right thing. The more i thought about the things i had done so far the more i realized, i was only trying to hold on the small part of me who still lives in my past. The girl who worked at her fathers police station, the girl who loved Namjoon and would do everything she could to fallow her fathers steps and protect the last family she had.
Right or wrong are just concepts made by us to justify our actions, who really decides was right or wrong in this? In the end we all have to count on someone else’s empathy to get a less harsh punishment. If a convicted criminal of murder shows remorse he could use the empathy of the judges, the same laws that are there to protect us also protect them, whether they are faking it or not.
There is no god in this, we are all by ourselves here trying to live in a world were anyone you cross paths could be a psychopath.
As Jack drove us back to the mansion this was all i could think of, feeling a weight over my chest press down my heart against my bones and the emptiness it left as if killing that men was the last straw to selling my soul to the devil and I could feel every bit of it happening under my skin.
All that didn’t phase Yoongi even the smallest bit, i stared at him sitting comfortably beside me he had his eyes closed a relaxed almost pleasant look on his face. It made me wonder if he even felt anything when he killed his first victim, was he a normal person once? Did life made him a monster? What lead him into this world?
Once we got at the mansion he walked out first and i fallowed him out, keeping on his shadow as he entered the mansion and slowly walked towards his office.
No one said a word the entire time and i could already feel the hot tension rise by the seconds, if he notice my presence behind him he didn’t mentioned and as we finally got in his office he was quick to fill a glass with alcohol while i turned to closed the doors behind me slowly sitting in on of the couches on the room.
He took the sit on the other couch in front of me lighting a cigarette the fire shining bright in front of his face making the scar on his eye even more noticeable, never failing to make his looks sharp and scarier. He took a blow of it before finally looking at me for the first time since we got here.
Whatever went through his head in that moment i knew it was far away from any comfort words, i never expected that from him and i wasn’t disappointed by it.
I had taking someone else’s life to save my brother, the only thing i want now is the truth he had promised me.
- if you are expecting a hug from me.. i hate to disappoint - was the first thing he said, scoffing a laugh.
- i wouldn’t dare to - i was quick to reply, getting a chuckle from him.
- then why did you fallow me? - he asked, clearly amused taking a sip of the drink in his hand while the cigarette burned between his fingers - wanna make sure i fallow the end of our bargain?
- yeah…
- don’t worry it’s done - he said, as if it was nothing. But i founded hard to believe, it couldn’t be as simple as that.
I never expected but it still angered me, moved by the fire inside me i got up making my way towards him i harshly took the cigarette from his fingers, taking a blow of it before turning to him.
- since you’ve proven yourself Yoongi why don’t you start talking? - i spat - i don’t want your compassion, i know you got none. From you i just want one thing, the damn truth.
- why? - he scoffed, turning to look at me impatiently - you think you’ll go back to that silly life of yours? Get over it, is too late for that. You’re in my world now, you get what i give when i decide to.
Now it was my turn to scoff but no matter how much that angered me he was right. You can lead the horse to the lake but you can’t force it to drink from it, i bite back my tongue feeling a bitter taste up my throat.
- and if you still want me to work for you, you need to start talking - i said, sitting down beside him.
- now you’re ordering me around? You are not in charge here sweetie…
- you owe me that - i said, turning to him, using the right words would get me good points with him, i needed to gain his trust if i wanted to live a longer life, that was the only way to avoid Jack. Still it infuriated me how he never told me anything, i knew he didn’t had to but the least he could do is tell me about his plans at the station.
I knew exactly were i stood in here, not above him, not beside him and not even under him like his dogs. I was disposable, the last thing I wanted was to die here of all places. I knew for a fact that fallowing the rules would get you the the best chance. I hated to admit that but that was the only way.
- you said you would tell me everything after i did my work tonight - i said - then do it. Why were you at the station that day? Why did you almost killed the director?
He sighted almost rolling his eyes, taking a sip of his hard liquor before looking at me with bored eyes.
- i had a deal with you’re director - he said, staring at the cup on his hand as he moved around over his thigh - you’re smart enough to know it by know, what would i possibly want with the police?
It had passed my mind before that the director wasn’t exactly the good guy to begin with, Yoongis insinuations seemed to set fire to that old thought of mine and I could almost feel the dots connecting to each other - so the police was working with them this whole time, they were hiding Agust D tracks every time and making it impossible to get him. But why?
Namjoon has been fallowing a ghost his whole life in hopes of making justice possible, they had been playing with him just like they did to me.
It made me sick to even think about it.
But most importantly I could only wonder what would the police needed with Yoongi or what he used against them to get them to hide his tracks this whole time?
- I’m sure you know now… - he chuckled, knowingly - you’re friend was getting too close, i came to talk to him and he decided to call out our agreement. He was confident that Namjoon guy would get me eventually, so i had to make sure I made them aware of who they were dealing with.
- so that was a massage… - i murmured, more to myself staring at the floor.
- yeah, not that i needed to do much - he chuckled, taking the cigarette from my hand yes staring back at me with smirk laying over his red lips - you just happened to be there right on time, every single time i needed.
- what?
- in so little time you manage to get inside Paradise, obviously thanks to Scarlet then you proceeded to offer yourself to me unknowingly and ruined their opportunity to get me - he said, eyes shining brighter with delight.
Looking so proud of my mistakes, it didnt help to ease the way my insides were turning and turning around at his words. Making more and more obvious how my intervention helped only him, the one i was so confident i would put behind bars.
- i had reasons for it…
The most poor and stupid excuse left my lips, I couldn’t look at his face anymore to embarrassed to face him and the truth. I made a terrible mistake by thinking I could face him head on and win.
- you did… but what now? - he taunted - what do you have? Nothing… you’ve been nothing but a puppet this entire time, my puppet.
He made it clear from the beginning how it would end up for me if I continued with that investigation on him, i was honestly surprised at how he left me leave the first moment we’ve meet and yet i decided to ignore all the warnings he was “kind” enough to give me. I pondered if he was truly warning me or if it all wasn’t just an act to get me exactly where he wanted me to be.
He told me he would bring me to hell if i kept digging for him and here i was now, it felt different having to hear him say all that I’ve been thinking about ever since we meet.
But I was too deep into the darkness that surrounded him, there was no way to live in this world without getting your hands dirty. I was aware of that. It was all my fault.
For a second i felt stupid at how well he played me without me even realizing, feeling stupid for being so weak and giving in more and more. But now? I didn’t felt bed for destroying the operation and letting Yoongi escape, i made up my mind in that car as we came back deciding to rather then running from the fire, i would burn and dance with it. He wasn’t wrong when he looked into my eyes and showed me my own sins, but the more i stared at the fire in his eyes the more i felt deeply attracted to the darkness surrounding him.
To survive.
To feed my own greed. Truly… a puppet.
-I could still end you here right now… - I gripped his neck.
I was serious, I could feel my blood boiling under my skin. My pride was hurt, my heart was in pieces and all he did was stare at me with a sly grin on his face. He chuckled gripping my hands around his neck even tighter, his eyes burning into mine.
- do it… - he dared - but we both know you won’t.
he wasted no time proving how much stronger he was then me, pulling my hands away from his neck. With one hand he gripped the back of my neck, pulling me closer.
- tell me why you won’t kill me… you had many chances… - he said, a whisper. He’s breath hitting my lips.
- don’t play as if you didn’t know why…
- no, you don’t play coy with me… come on now, be a good girl for me and use your words.
His lips lifted into a smirk, he leaned forward face centimeters away from mine. Feeling his breath over my own lips a shiver runs down my whole body, the smell of whiskey was intoxicating making me crave more of him.
- say it… y/n.
I swallowed hard before thinking about it one last time. I knew this was one way and no turning back, but Yoongi was my best shot at surviving now. Even more he wanted me to be honest with him and myself.
- Don’t lie to me… - he smile was completely sickening, eyes darker then ever - it’s not that hard.
- i want…
- yes, what do you want? - he leaned more into me, hands reaching behind me to cage me under his body.
And to feed my desires for him.
- you…
He stopped immediately, eyes searching for mine and in that split second while i stared into his sharp eyes i saw his facet break, just a bit but enough for me to notice - surprise. He truly didn’t expect me to say that, one would even think that hearing that would be so fulfilling to ones ego, but him? It was as if he never heard it before. I didn’t know anything could get a reaction from him but i knew in that moment, despite everything else he secretly wished to be desired too. Even though he said he knew.
So i took my chance and braced the fire that would come with it.
Closing my arms around his neck i pushed him down, sitting over his lap with one leg on each side of his hips.
- i want you, Agust d - i said over his lips - in every way possible.
Looking down in his eyes seeing how he no longer had any trace of surprise in them but a serious look, hands sliding up my hips to my bear back holding my arms to slid away from his neck.
My heart begin to beat faster, blood running cold on my body. Shit.
I could see it in his eyes that he wanted, so what was holding him back in that moment?
- are you sure? - he simply asked, not looking me in the eyes but at our hands - do you have any idea what that choice comes with?
- does it matter to you? - i bit into my lower lip, i felt so confused in that moment. The warmth that surrounded us was disintegrating slowly, i helplessly wanted to hold on into that warmth.
His unphased expression was making me more and more anxious, one moment i was burning under his gaze and now completely frozen and lost. Swallowing all of my pride and embracing myself, i wished to be right about this.
- it makes me…. Yours - in that small second i looked into his eyes again i saw the surprised in them, bearly noticeable but it was there for a second.
- and you’re sure you can take what comes with that? - he mutter over my lips.
- i don’t know but i don’t wanna leave you…
I can’t leave my only chance to survive now.
- you’re life will be mine… completely… - he whispered above my lips.
- we’ll go down together then.
I didn’t wanted to lose any more seconds when i pushed my lips over his, feeling his smirk as i bite into his botttom lip. Catching his eyes briefly as i did so, he was quick to press his short nails on my exposed back scratching the skin down stoping at my hips. I moaned on his mouth kissing him hungrily.
He let out a soft groan as i slide my hands down his waist inside his shirt slowly tracing his ribs, the friction was enough to make us both lose our minds, i could tell he was holding back from letting out a moan as i grinded against his hips, my own body was becoming needy, craving more and more.
- Mmngh..You feel so good… - He whispered between ragged breathes and I felt my thoughts growing more and more blank, the only thing on my mind right now was him.
I grind against his hips again, feeling his warmth through the fabrics separating us, his breath hitches when i grind against him again, i hold his chin up taking in his lustful gaze, his grip on my hips tightened and i could almost feel how blissful he was becoming.
He gives me a devious smirk and gently ran his fingers along your spine as he whispered in my ear:
- You truly are a skilled rider, you feel so good on top of me.
The doors for the office burst open.
- you have to go to Busan - said Jack in a rushed tone.
Yoongi leaned away from me, hands still dancing over my naked back. I stared at him as he nodded to Jacks direction who soon left the room.
- i have to go - he said to me.
I nodded resting my forehead over his, lips brushing against each other as the heat slowly drifted away from our bodies.
- now, you behave while I’m gone.
His hands slipped down my back to rest over my hips pulling me out of his lap. After that o was quick to make my way out of his office but no before he called out my name.
- the room in front of mine - he said - that’s your room, some of your stuff is there already.
- okay, thanks.
With that i left completely.
From what i could tell, how he suddenly changed in seconds and jacks rushed and slightly worried eyes, something big must’ve happen that needed him to be there in person. I over heard from Namjoon once at the station, that his mafia had rooted connections in Busan as they were investigating and I wonder if Namjoon manage to take action on his secret plan as he told me once.
If he did Yoongi might be in trouble, but I can’t tell. Both of them are unpredictable when it comes to getting what they want.
[…]
It’s been two days since Yoongi left to Busan, no one told me anything about him or when was he even going to come back.
Anytime I would worry about him my mind would remind me of who I was thinking about, he certainly was not someone who would let anything happen to him. He made it clear who he was and what he was capable of. So I worry nothing about him.
Still it felt weird to be here without him, it was his house and I was used to have his presence around. Hands even been that long and I was so deep in a nest of snakes.
I had shaken hands with the devil before now it was time to dance with him, the only thing that kept wondering with worry in my mind was how no one would tell me anything.
The few maids in the house wouldn’t even say a word to me, the guards around the mansion acted like I was invisible.
I had no one here.
It felt just like I was back at the station once again, no one would tell me anything because I wasn’t a detective yet. Just a mere office worker for them, I couldn’t tell anything to Namjoon because he wouldn’t understand.
He grew up in a completely different world then mine, he didn’t know how hard it was to try to grow your career in a police station especially when you are a woman, no matter how good I was or my scores in the academy they still viewed me as weak and fragile.
I thought that if I worked harder they would notice me, but that only got me more work and less acknowledgement.
My view for them has changed also, now that I knew how corrupted they are. They were nothing but mere trash to me. Walking garbage.
My days here were the same, day after day ever since Yoongi left I was completely alone in this mansion. The only exception being the presence of the house keeper and the very few employees that helped her.
Another two days had went by without any news from Yoongi, I don’t know if I should’ve been grateful for that or worried.
Tha was until I heard a loud noise from downstairs, I was goin to bed since it was half past ten already but the noise caught me off guard. I quickly turned to fallow it and see what was that about.
The moment I saw his face I couldn’t hold myself anymore, first thing I notice I was rushing towards him. No second thoughts in my head as I closed my arms around Yoongis neck. For a while he didn’t move, I could feel how his body was stiff under my arms.
- what are you doing? - he said. His words were like a bucket of cold water.
Of course it would be like this, what was I even thinking in that moment. Is not like I missed him.
- I’m just checking if you got any holes in you… - I pull away, staring up at his eyes.
- you think I’d be that careless? - he chuckled - it was all playful banter…
He didn’t seem one bit concerned or stressed, almost as if he went to a trip and not to fix a problem. He came back in a complete different mood then he left. Was i wrong then? Did Namjoon not went with his plan for Busan?
- not that I care about what you do… but next time send a message?
- I’ll remember that for the next time… - he says as he walks up the stairs, without looking back.
I scoffed, of course. Criminals and their cold blooded hearts, i only grew more suspicious. Exactly what happened in Busan?
I decide to fallow him up stairs, not really sure why. It felt so natural, waiting for him to come home and being in his presence after not seeing him for days.
I enter his office after him, watching as he lights a cigarette and sits down behind his desk.
- You seem off… more then usual… - I cross my arms over my chest as I observe him.
For some there wouldn’t be a way to see it, but he was different tonight. I could see it by how he used his left hand to light his cigarette, he never did that and he kept avoiding having to use his right hand. He didn’t meet my eyes ever since he came back, he’d always stare at me so deep as if sweeping inside my soul.
It was odd how he looked serious now, not intense serious but cold, so cold.
He paused for a second, looking around before he glance at me with irritation clear in his eyes.
- Does it concern you ? - He replied, his voice low and sharp.
He took a long drag from his cigar, the smoke spilling past his lips in a steady stream.
- I was busy with work - He muttered simply, the corner of his lips quirking up into an almost mocking smirk.
-it was just an observation…- I say, at that point I knew he wasn’t going to tell me anything and I couldn’t blame him. If I was him, I wouldn’t either.
He let out a dry laugh, shaking his head slightly. “Is that so ?” He mused, his eyes boring into you.
- How observant of you - he sneered, his gaze now locked on mine. - as always…
He visibly tensed, his hand clenching around his cigar for a moment, his eyes narrowing as he studied you carefully. He let out a huff, his expression still stoic, but his eyes almost seemed to soften slightly.
- i have a meeting tomorrow… - He finally says - you’ll accompany me so go to bed, is late already.
Part of me wanted to stay, to talk to him but I knew better. Besides how tense and angry he was in that moment he still manage a bit of softness to tell me to go rest it was tiny, but it was there and that weighted so much more to me then I ever thought it was possible.
With no further do, i turn to leave his office but he pulls me back. Fingers circling around my wrist.
I look back at him surprised for a second, that surely was unusual.
- don’t leave yet…- he says, looking away from me.
- do you need to tell me something more? - I questioned, crossing my arms.
- don’t… - he mumbled, frowning as he stared at the desk in front of him - don’t sleep on your room tonight.
I could almost feel the thumping of my heart in my chest the moment he said those words, as if on cue my entire body burns with excitement but I try to hold back from the possibility.
- and were should I sleep? - I mumbled, my voice almost a whisper.
- with me.
I gasped the moment he pulls me closer by the waist, pressing our bodies together as his hands slide down my back at my hips.
- you should sleep with me tonight…
I stared into his eyes looking for something, anything that could tell me what was going inside his mind. He’s been hot and cold ever since he came back from Busan, keeping secrets and acting as if nothing happened even though I couldn’t tell that there was more to it then he was letting me know. Now as i stood so close to him, feeling the warmth of his skin and his heart beat through his chest. How his eyes seemed to falter ever so slightly, i knew it.
Something did happen.
But neither he could tell how he felt.
[…]
I couldn’t tell if I had actually slept, it felt as if I only blinked my eyes and when I open it was morning already.
Going to bed with him last night felt so odd and i could tell it was for him too, because we weren’t enveloped by the blinding desire or our needs. It was more intimate then we’ve been to each other, we both spent a night together only by each other’s arms and suddenly it didn’t felt like i was in bed with Agust d, that was Yoongi. When i woke up he was already up.
This time I had breakfast with Yoongi and seeing him across from the table as the light reflected on his face was a sight for sore eyes, how the sun iluminated every line of his face making him look much softer even with the scar over his eye. He looked so domestic in that moment that I almost forgot I was looking at a criminal. Almost.
Looks can surely be deceiving - i thought as i sipped my coffee, watching him from across the table.
We haven’t spoken a word to each other since last night, none of us tried to make small conversation. We just kept going as if everything was normal. It felt unreal and yet so comforting, it still amazed me how natural we could act together at times like this at this point I didn’t know if he was the insane person or me.
Oddly enough we did everything together, from breakfast to picking each other’s clothes for today, to lunch and eventually getting ready in his room for the meeting.
I was confused, it was writing all over my face and anyone could tell. Even he could as we got ready in his bathroom, I couldn’t stop stealing glances at him as i did my make up.
- that’s rude… - he said as he fixed his sleeves - you’re staring.
- that’s audacious coming from you - put the lipstick own.
We didn’t said anything after that but I couldn’t forget how he laughed at that, for the first time it was a genuine laugh.
As i found myself beside him on his car, Hoseok - as he called jack when we got in the car - drove us to our destination and I couldn’t understand how he wouldn’t just tell me what this all was about, even after making me come all the way with him.
What was this meeting about? Why he needed me there?
- I have something for you…- he said for the first time since we left the house.
- yes? - I turned to look at him.
He takes my hand, palm facing up before placing a silver collar with a butterfly on it.
- I saw you wearing one like this when I first meet you… - he says as if it was nothing.
I looked at him in utter shock, i was aware that he was perceptive of everything around him I just never knew I was included in that perception as well. He had notice such small detail about me from so long ago, I couldn’t hide my surprise - more like utter shock.
- don’t think too much of it… you can wear it or throw it away - he says, his tone was nonchalant, but i could still see his lingering gaze on the necklace every now and then.
- I never thought you were one to give gifts…
- humph… i told you not to think much of it - he looks over the window as i stare at him with a grin.
- my bad… help me put it on? - i say leaning closer to his side, watching as he looks at me suspiciously.
His eyes lock into mine sharply, almost like a cat eyeing a mouse before he scoffed and leaned closer to me with a smirk on his lips. He takes the necklace from my hand, and turn my back for him holding my hair up as he places the jewelry around my neck. For a split moment his cold finges slowly brush against my neck making me almost shrink at the sudden touch. I could hear his south breathing behind me, his breath hitting the back of my back exposed by the dress i wore. Once i could tell the necklace was closed around my neck i let go my hair, but before i could move away he pulls on my arm making me stop on my tracks.
- what? - i say in almost a whisper, feeling my cheeks heat up for letting him know how he had affected me in that moment.
- don’t move… - he says behind me, his breathing hitting my shoulder as he leans even closer.
I could feel my face heating up and body shivering, suddenly feeling like a tiger was about to jump over me from behind. He pulls my hair to the side, his touch almost soothing and like a predator hunting its pray he was the best at distracting before attacking.
I gasped when he suddenly grips my neck pushing his body against mine as he circles his right arm around my waist.
- you do have a beautiful neck… - he whispers in my ear - you know what i like the most about you, y/n?
- no… - i swallowed hard, knowing him this could either end really good or bad.
- your strength… - he grips my neck tighter, forcing me to look only ahead but still not enough to cut my air, just enough to apply the needed pressure to keep me in his claws. - you almost look weak but when i push the right buttons you never hesitate to pull the trigger, such an interesting puppet you are y/n. I want you beside me.
- i thought i already was… you trying to make it seem I’m choosing to work for you just to mess with me - i grip his writs pulling his hand off my neck - i was always a pawn on your games, i will stay beside you but not like the others.
- good… - he gives me small smile letting go of me- I’d hate to get bored of you so soon.
I couldn’t decipher him at all. He only acted however he saw fit in any situation, I couldn’t understand him at all but one thing i knew - he did know which buttons to push to make me go mad in both good and bad ways.
The car son comes to a stop in front of a luxury building, the name Golden Star shined bright in cursive words on top of it. A few sports cars were parked in front of it and i watched as a men walks out of a Ferrari in a tuxedo with a woman wearing a bright silver dress, completely exuding luxury head to toe. Suddenly i felt a bit self conscious of picking my doctor martins as shoes with the dress i wore, it never bothered me before in Paradise because people there weren’t always dressed so sophisticated like that but now that i look at it. I should’ve have put more effort into it.
Yoongi takes my hand placing around his arm as he guides me inside the building, the place was something I’ve only ever saw in movies. As we walk past the entrance we stop at the entering hall, in the middle of two big stairs was a red velvet curtain leading to entry of the cassino. I only ever heard about this place on the news, the hotel and cassino Golden Star. Even the air here felt more rich than outside.
- master Yoongi - a men dressed in a tuxedo approaches us, his name tag read Alfred. - mister Wuhan hasn’t arrived yet but he left the room ready for you in advance, but if you wish to entertain yourself at the cassino till his arrival I’ll guide you there.
- want to see the cassino? - Yoongi suddenly whispered to me.
- what? - i looked at him surprised, i didn’t expect he would take that into consideration and mostly i didn’t understand why he would.
- it might take some time… won’t you indulge into some fun before the real meeting starts? - he grins, glint shining in his eyes mischievously.
- honestly… it doesn’t catch my interest.
It truly didn’t, games in cassino were never something I found interest in partaking. If ever, i might felt curious now that they were so close to my reach but i was more inclined into watching it seeing how it worked rather than playing.
- we’ll go straight to the room - he says to Alfred.
- Very well master - Alfred smiles softly - this way, please.
We fallow Alfred up the long stairs, into a long corridor till we stop at a double black door. The men uses a black card on the digital lock, i notice the three golden letters on it “VIP” in golden cursive. As the door opens were soon met with glass window wall ahead with golden curtains hanging from above on each corner. The floor and the walls where black but the floor had a marble effect with gold and gray, in the center of the room was a L couch in velvet black as well as a red glass coffee table in the center and a mini bar on the right with a tv above it on the wall.
The decoration wasn’t what surprised me but who was sitting there, all blissful and shirt half opened.
- oh there you are… Agust d and miss bodyguard… - Jimin looks at us over his lashes, taking a sip of a red drink on his right hand and having a hard time with the straw. Clearly he was already drunk.
- i thought you stoped with this…. - Yoongi says, walking over the opposite couch and sitting down already taking a cigarette and his lighter to smoke.
- i did but… Wuhan offered a good deal so I couldn’t say no - Jimin mumbles, for a moment i try not to jump to conclusions but I couldn’t help but wonder what business he had here, especially with the men Yoongi was supposed to met.
- take a sit.. - Yoongi says to me, blowing the smoke into the air - have your fill…
He motions with his head towards the mini bar filled with all different types of alcohol bottles.
- I’m not one to drink actually - i cross my arms, taking a cigarette at sit at the corner of the couch.
- why? Can’t handle your alcohol? - he smirks, his tone full of sarcasm.
- no i just get tired from drinking, besides… as your pawn shouldn’t i stay sober? - i arch my eyebrow as i look at him.
- touché… - he blows the smoke into my direction.
- did you two fight? - Jimin leans closer to me - y/n! Since you’re here give me some attention, hum?
He blinked slowly as he stares at me, still leaning closer to my side. Although i doubt he was doing on purpose and not just falling at this point. It could be considered a crime how blissfully beautiful he looked now, perhaps the lingering innocence he managed to keep while still having a sexy appeal was what made him impossible to resist. The combo of always saying the right words as if he coated each one with honey could be added to the list of things that made him powerful, with no doubt i was sure he could have anyone he wanted with just a few words.
But i wasn’t like others, i could still see under that mask he wore, different then Yoongi i could read Jimin with ease because that was who he was, he never tried to hide his intentions and desires. Being like that was who he was, and being himself with the wrong people was what made him weak and easy to take advantage off. Knowing that I couldn’t just look at him as some sexy guy in front of me, i felt more… worried.
- i’ll give you some then…- i smiled softly, taking the glass from his hand i pick a bottle of water from the coffee table opening for him and putting a straw in it, i hold it up for him to drink.
At first he only stares at me with a pout on his lips before reluctantly drink the water, i hear a chuckle behind me and i look at Yoongi over my shoulder.
- you’re picking strays like that? - he teases.
- shut up… I’d do the same for you… - I mumble.
- you wouldn’t.
His assertion was final, it was truth. I would never do the same for him because he would never put himself into such situations, Yoongi didn’t need anyone to take care of him he was just that capable of living by himself. Knowing exactly every step to take to get where he wanted and never falling into the temptations of getting wasted as it would only take away his focus and control. Perhaps now I could actually get a little bit inside his mind after all, that thought brought a smile to my face for some reason.
I spend the next moments taking care of Jimin, making sure he eat an apple from the fruit plate in the middle of the coffee table that at first I thought was fake, and making sure he drinks water until he’s at least bit sober.
Jimin was a baby when drunk, I took those mental notes as he nuzzled on my neck and pouted the entire time.
If it wasn’t for the moment someone called him over he would probably still be on my lap like a puppy.
- Thank you miss body guard… thanks to you I can walk down the stairs without breaking a bone - he smiled at me before walking out the privet room.
I chuckled to myself as I saw him leaving.
- you’re quite the sweetheart adopting strays… - yoongi mumble.
- you seem jealous? - I retorted.
- me? Of that? - he scoffed, while pouring another glass of whiskey for himself.
He looked at me for a moment wordlessly, his gaze boring into mine. He slides closer to my side, until i almost feel his body heat against mine.
- Maybe you’re just trying to get a reaction out of me, - he added, voice lowering to a deep murmur as he holds his eyes still firmly on mine.
- And if I want a reaction, which do I get? - I stare back at his eyes firmly.
A hint of a smirk tugged at the corners of his mouth, and he took another drag from his cigar, a plume of smoke billowing around his face.
-Maybe you should find out, -he replied, his voice lowering to a deep murmur. He was leaning so close now I could feel the heat from his body, the scent of cigar smoke filling my lungs and the whiskey on his breath.
He let the moment drag on, his eyes never leaving mine. After a few moments of silence, he reached out, his fingers brushing against my cheek as he holds my chin to face him.
- You’re playing a dangerous game, - he murmured, almost to himself.
- you’ve been sitting here watching, playing fool but I want you… - I stare back at him.
A low growl escaped his lips and in one swift move, he had me backed up against the couch, his body pressed close to mine, hands on each side of my head, trapping me under him.
- You’re playing with fire…. - he whispered against my ear, his voice a low murmur. - we shouldn’t do this game now… I’m working here.
I froze for moment, his eyes meeting mine with a longing and fire I never seen before. I could feel my body heat rise, my chest moving up and down as I breathed and the loud thump of my own heart beat in my ears.
- You don’t know what you’re asking for, - he said quietly, his voice almost hoarse. - teasing me like this before my meeting….
- Why? Afraid someone might walk in? - I mumbled, breathing heavily as I looked from his eyes to his lips.
I could see how he tensed slightly, his eyes darting to the door.
- I’m not afraid of anything, - he snapped, his voice a little gruff. He leaned in closer to my face, his gaze intense. - But if someone were to walk in, what would they see? How much… would be off by then?
He slides his hand under the skirt of the dress, tracing up my thigh and pulling over his hip.
His hand clenched around my thigh, the tension between you both growing.
- You want to do this here? - He asked quietly, his voice gruff. He leaned in even closer, his breath hot against the skin of my neck.
- You set my body on fire… is only fair you take care of it.
- I might just do something we’ll both regret. - he murmured, his voice low and rough.
- I never thought you’d be one to restrain yourself?
A smirk tugged at the corner of his lip, and let out a mocking little huff.
- You really think you can tease me, don’t you? - He asked, his voice lowering to a dangerous murmur.
Before i could respond, he suddenly pressed his body against me, his lips claiming mine in a harsh, intense kiss.
- Mmmh… - I circle my arms around his neck, pulling him even closer.
His lips met with mine hungrily, body pressing against mine and hands gripping my thighs in bruising grip. He didn’t hold back, making me ache even more for his touch, giving in to the desire i had been holding back for so long. One of his hands gripped my hip as the other slides over my side and chest, giving it a tight squeeze before sliding up my neck grabbing a fistful of my hair. I moan into his mouth, arching my back, he let out a low, guttural, possessive growl against your mouth.
He tilts my head to the side, with a pull on my hair trailing his lips down my neck, leaving rough kisses as he went. I was a mess under him as he continued to bite and suck on the sensitive skin, gripping his shoulders as I felt him leave a long lick over my pulse.
- Do you have any idea what you do to me?- He whispered against my skin, his voice rough and ragged sending shivers down my spine.
- Ahhh… I could think of… a few things… - I mumble breathlessly.
He thinks I can still speak right now?
He let out a mocking little huff, his breath hot against my neck.
- Oh really? - He asked, his lips hovering over your skin, his tongue darting out to taste you. - You seem confident, huh?
- shut up…
He lets out a dark laugh, his hand tightening in your hair.
- Is that what you want? - he presses another harsh nip at my neck. - For me to shut up?
He tugged on my hair again, pulling my head back further, exposing more of my neck completely to himself. His lips trail wet kisses along my skin, nibbling gently on my collarbones.
He lets go of my hair, hand trailing down the curve of my body to my hip, squeezing the flesh in a tight grip.
I could feel his smirk against my skin, his fingers gripping into my hip tighter as he pushed his body even more against mine, pressing his hips into mine.
- Don’t tell me you’re getting shy on me all of a sudden? - he murmured, his tone almost mocking.
- Shut up… you know what I want…
- I know what you want - he murmured, his voice low and rough. He leaned in, his lips ghosting against my earlobe so softly I could feel my body giving in all restraints - But I want to hear you say it. Tell me what you want.
I couldn’t bring myself to say it, all the things I wanted him to do to me in that moment. All the lewd things that clouded my mind and the ways I wanted him to take me. For a split second I was back at reality, we shouldn’t be doing this now. Anyone could enter the room, but heaving him so close after heaving a taste was not helping my mind make a single right thought.
So I didn’t say anything and just pulled him into a fervently kiss.
He groans against my lips, almost caught of guard as i pull him but quickly, his hand is gripping my hip even tighter as he regains controls once more. His body is pressed even more into mine, his other hand grabbing a fistful of my hair, as his lips move against mine hungrily, desperately as if he couldn’t get enough of it and so couldn’t I.
His tongue delves into my mouth, tasting, dominating the kiss in a brutal sort of way. He was restless, pushing and pressing his body flush against mine, his arms wrapped around your waist as he grinds against my core pulling my leg over his hip.
I groan into his mouth, pulling on his hair making him moan into the kiss, his hand yanking on your hair slightly as I bite his bottom lip. He was so demanding and fierce, It turned me on even more, and i could feel the fire inside me burning hotter with each second. I needed him desperately.
He pulls away from the kiss, nipping at my lip, and moves back to kiss along the side of my neck again, this time with a little more teeth, as if to leave his own mark on me.
- You’re driving me crazy… - he murmurs against your throat, his voice rough.
He lets out another low chuckle, as he continues to kiss along your neck, his teeth grazing the skin, leaving behind little marks as his hands roam all of my body.
I stare up at his eyes, holding him closer. I wanted to stay in that moment forever but before I could even open my lips to say anything, the sound of a knock on the door stopped us.
He froze, his eyes snapping towards the door, his expression dark. He was breathing heavily, holding me even tighter, obviously angry to be interrupted at this moment.
- He’s here… - Jack voice says from the other side of the door.
The men Yoongi was supposed to meet arrived. What a timing.
Once he registered that he was quick to let go of me, sitting upright while he fixed his shirt.
Now it was time for business, for Agust d to show up.
- I’m gonna fix myself in the bathroom… - I say as I get up.
- yeah… don’t take too long though - he mumbles already taking another cigar from his pocket.
Once I exit the room I release a breathe I didn’t even knew I was holding, my body still tingled from the after effects of his touches and I couldn’t think of anything else but us.
I no longer felt ashamed from wanting more, for the first time I’ve been with Yoongi I only wanted more of him. I didn’t had to worry about people finding out at work because I no longer belonged to that life.
As I walk to the ladies room, I look back at the corridor seeing as a men with white hair walks into the room Yoongi was. He had two bodyguards with him and Jimin by his side, clinching his arm like an intimate friend. So that’s what he does - I thought.
I didn’t wanted to go back now, so I took my time in the bathroom. Splashing some cold water on my hands so i can wet my neck, trying my best to keep my body in control.
For some reason I had a bad feeling about this meeting. I couldn’t put my mind into what it was, but something felt odd. I felt like I saw that men with the white hair before, was it something at the station about him, perhaps, but I couldn’t put my mind to it.
With one last look at the mirror I exit the bathroom, walking back to the VIP room. From afar I notice the two body guards weren’t by the door anymore, making me stop immediately at my tracks. This didn’t seem right, as I reach for the door handle I hear a groan from behind the door and my heart jumps in my chest - Yoongi!
I gasped as a hand grabs me from behind pressing a cloth over my mouth and nose, the strong smell of chemicals immediately hits me making my nose burn. I try my hardest to pull away but the men holds me tightly against a wall, my mind was beginning to feel hazy and I knew what would happen then.
I was getting kidnapped.
What a damn timing.
[…]
It felt like I was hit by a car, my head was so heavy it took my longer to open my eyes then to wake up. I regretted immediately after once a sharp pain hit through my head, when I tried to move I felt my wrists and feet tied to the chair.
All the sounds around me were distant muffled voices, my head was spinning and I couldn’t speak.
- oi! Wake up doll…
- oh… gods… you guys are ugly - i groaned, looking up at the two men.
I’m so fucked now, how did i even got in this situation?
- ahh damn you Agust D!
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Authors note: Call me the queen of cliff hanger endings because I’m about to push you all, jokes aside i bet you all thought i left right? And i did… for some time, but I’m back to finish this up for you all. Also sorry for any errors and mistakes. You better give this chapter a heart! Love you all and happy new year!
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#bts fanfiction#bts smut#bts x you#yoongi x reader#yoongi smut#jimin x reader#bts au#min yoongi x reader#min yoongi smut#yoongi series#min yoongi fanfic#yoongi fanfic#bts fic#bts fanfic#min yoongi x you#yoongi x y/n
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Dungeon Meshi has fully consumed me, especially a certain tiny union man, and I want to ramble about Chilchuck's traumatic backstory for a bit. Mild manga spoilers under the cut.
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The first time I read the manga I missed this bit, since I was reading an online version that didn't have all the extras included. Since I've come across this litte omake, though, I haven't been able to stop thinking about it. It just explains so much about why Chilchuck is the way he is.
First, at a surface level, it's interesting that this backstory only comes out in the framework of talking about a monster. Chilchuck is offering basically an anecdote about succubi, adding to the conversation he and his party are having about a monster species. It's all very casual and offhand. No one even remarks on what that experience would have meant to Chilchuck on a personal level, and he doesn't dwell on it, either. You have to wonder if Chilchuck would have ever mentioned it at all if they weren't specifically talking about succubi.
But holy heck, just think about this for a moment. On one of Chilchuck's first outings as an adventurer, possibly the first time he joined a party, his fellow adventurers were planning to feed him to a monster. He's only alive now because he had the instinct that something was wrong and had the speed, wisdom, and stealth to run away. He could have died. He could have been murdered. And it's implied that this happens to half-foots frequently in this world.
How traumatizing would that have been for a young adventurer? The people he should have been able to trust to have his back were literally planning his death, all for monetary gain. He was treated as disposable, a resource to be exploited, not a person. Not only is there the trauma of narrowly escaping death here, there's also the trauma of being mistreated and abused by other thinking, intelligent beings.
No freaking wonder he has trust issues. He's been working with Laios and his party for three years at this point and he's never shared a single solitary personal detail about his life, not even his age. He can't bear to allow any vulnerability to show, because he can't allow himself to be taken advantage of again. No wonder he's so prickly and wary. No wonder he's so sensitive to being viewed as anything other than a capable, skilled, fully realized and autonomous adult. No wonder he shies away from affection and any hint of closeness, especially in the early chapters of the manga.
I'm amazed that Chilchuck had the strength and fortitude to stay in the business at all. He considered his options and took steps to keep himself safe, including only accepting pay in advance and starting a union to protect himself and other half-foots. (Another tidbit you don't get at first in the story--Chilchuck is not just a member of a union or the leader, he started the whole dang thing to begin with.)
But what's so lovely, and wonderful, what makes this story take over my brain so completely and utterly, is that Chilchuck doesn't stay this way. Over the course of the manga, he opens up more and more. He allows himself to be emotionally vulnerable; he shares more and more details of his life. He treats Marcille and Izutsumi like daughters, Laios and Senshi like brothers. He loves them and allows himself to be loved in return.
And that's one of many reasons that Dungeon Meshi is one of the best found-family stories I've come across in a long, long time.
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Just an idea of mine while listening to like him by Tyler the creator, I cannot fathom just how much this is so relatable to not [] reader bro. So have a bit of a long rant/fic ig, this is up to your interpretation if it's not [] reader or just my version of reader from the not [] series.
(this is my first time writing so excuse me if it's a bit shabby)
Visiting your mother's grave was quite a moment for you, you remember when you would always visit her grave if you could when she just died, but then couldn't since you moved houses, to the Wayne house or manor I guess? ...but now as an independent adult, you can always go to her grave to mourn or just talk to her, just like how you did when she's alive.
Although you never really remember her much, since she died when you were in such a young age you still would remember her words... specifically, this one
"Damn, everytime I look at you i swear to God! " your mother exclaims, looking at you excitedly. She didn't really feel like all of her cursing would effect you negatively much if she just uses it lightly.
"You got his feet, you got his body, you got his long arms, fingers and shit, everything! "
Thinking about it now, do you really look like him?, I mean sure! Your his biological child, not that you wanted to be, there is a research about how the first child to be made largely takes the appearance of their father, but yet again... You were just fine with your mother, plus, everything worked out without him. Before your mother died at least..
Sitting in front of your Mother's grave you think about it, looking at her grave fondly yet there's a glint in your eyes that shows just how pained you are to lose her. Maybe you would've had a different life if she had lived, one that didn't include you having to be so over achieveing just for a sliver of attention from your "family" that clearly didn't care for you.
It was a pretty cloudy day, a bit cold you admit, you should've wear a coat or a jacket before visiting here at least... It feels a bit colder knowing you feel like your being watched somewhere..
"You gave me love.... And affection, attention, protection"
"So how could I ever miss something, that I never had? "
"I would never judge ya, cause everything worked out without him.. "
You never really experienced what it is to feel loved by a father since you already had your mothers love at the time. But she still felt guilty knowing you didn't experience a fathers love, well, you didn't really experienced it either when moving into the Wayne manor..., maybe Alfred is the fatherly love you've experience but technically he wasn't your father...
"Mama I'm chasing a ghost... "
He never really did gave attention to you, affection, protection, attention,love, none of those in all of your time living in that stupid manor, hell, even your supposedly sibling did too, even one of them wasn't all that pleased with your mere presence in this manor.
"I decided to really get that love inside you, I would never ever lie to you"
"You ain't never gotta lie to me, I'm every thing that I strive to be.. "
Music really is your aspiration, inspiration, everything... It's makes you let out all of your feelings to a song, makes you feel a bit better with yourself, its embarrassing to think that you've made a song for each of your "family" member once or twice, only for it to not ever be heard by them, but be heard by other people, strangers.
"So do I look like him? "
"I don't look like him... "
You prayed, hell, begged even, that you do not look like him, Bruce Wayne , god you wished you were not his child, it makes you feel disgusted that you look like your father, a man that never loved or care for you. Only seeing you as a mere obstacle, though you bet he ever see you as one, considering he's too busy forgetting about your mere presence.
"Please... For the love of God, don't tell me I look like him... "
(HOLY HELL THAT WAS LONG, so sorry about that, I just feel a deep appreciation for your writing, you never really talked about readers mother in the not [] series as far as I can remember, so I just made a tiny headcanon, about how reader is fond of their mother but doesn't remember much since she died when reader was at such a young age, maybe 4 or 5 years old, just like any other generic batfam fic, no Offense. I also added some things that are not on the song, as well as changing some of the lyrics, I hope you don't mind and enjoy my poopy writing!!!)
Oh. My. God!!!!
I absolutely love it!!! You can really feel the emotions put behind it, and having the song go through my head honestly really helped with it too! And your small piece really does show how it can relate to the reader in the Not [ ] Series a lot!! Even then it was an enjoyable read and I'm glad you decided to share it!
Sure, maybe it doesn't quite fit my own interpretation, but the fact it fits yours makes it so special and honestly love it so much more then if it fit my own. Besides! I like to leave things a little open so that you can cone up with your own things, just like this!!! The fact you made it just from my silly little fic really inspires me, thanks so much!!
For your first time writing, it isn't all that bad either! Changing some stuff around qas a great choice, and adds more to the narrative you were trying to make, which I actually really love! If you wrote more, even if just for fun and as a hobby, I'd love to see more of your work :]
Nevertheless, thanks for sending this in, and you didn't do so bad! 💛
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far from sober | H.S
my masterlist
part II
summary: you’re incredibly drunk, and when you are it comes with you having an obscene lack of a filter. harry being the sweetheart he is, is trying to get you back into your hotel room in one piece. he was not ready for you to be so touchy.
warnings: alcohol consumption, drunk people (including close family members), fluff, sexual tension, brothers best friend, drunk crying lol
a/n: sorry I haven’t posted properly in a while! here’s a shorter piece while I work on some more stuff <3 plenty to come x
———
Saying you were a bit drunk was a drastic understatement.
You were stumbling all over the place, heels becoming impractical now you were so intoxicated.
Harry, who knew you were going out with some of your family and friends tonight at the bar, had no idea what he was coming back to.
You don’t remember actually intending to get this drunk, but your Aunty had been egging the group on to do some shots, and before you know it you’re well past tipsy. Even your mum was getting drunker than you’d seen in years.
So all the other boys who’d gone out— including Harry— walk into the hotel bar. It was as chic as the lobby, just adorning some more neon signs and rustic bar stools.
Harry had gone out with them to look at a heap of shit that you and your female family members had little interest in. They’d insisted you all stay and just have a couple cocktails, since it was a holiday after all.
It was to their surprise when your same eager aunt bounded up to them when they popped through the door to the bar. They had expected tipsy, but not hammered.
“Oh my god!! You guys will not believe how good the cocktails are here!” She swooned, and they all glanced at each other with an amused chuckle.
“I think I just might believe it.” One of the boys piped up.
Most of them dispersed to find their significant others, family or friends amidst the bar, and see how much chaos was being caused.
But you’d b-lined straight for Harry, regardless of whether he was seeking you out.
His brows shot up when you collided with his side, “Harry!”
Your arms wrap around his middle and you end up latching onto him, practically using him to keep yourself upright.
“Oh!” He speaks in surprise, hands jumping up to brace around your lower back.
“Are you absolutely hammered too, love?” He chuckles and you bury your face into his chest.
“Yeaaaaa…” you drawl, a smile spreading onto your face.
“Everyone else is rounding up their partners. Suppose I’m in charge of you, yea?” He suggests, rubbing your back.
“Wanna—“ you hiccup, “have a drink with me?”
He shakes his head with amusement, “I think you’ve had plenty, sweetheart. We should get you back to your room.”
Most of your drunk family were getting escorted out by their respective people, being taken up to their hotel room before they can drink themselves any sillier.
This included your brother, Leon, who had his longtime girlfriend pulled into his side, holding her half up and laughing a little at her drunken slur.
He came to a stop when he seen both of you, eyes flitting between your two figures. A small twitch of his brows suggested he wasn’t sure of how he felt about the sight.
“You got her?” He asks, a protective edge to his voice. One that drunken you missed easily as you stayed plastered against him— which is something sober you would not do in general, let alone in front of your brother.
Harry nodded straight away, understanding his defensiveness over you since he feels the same about Gemma. He said softly, “Of course, I’ve got her mate. I’ll take her up to her room.”
Leon glanced at you again. Harry and him met when they were 9, and they’ve been best friends since then. He trusts Harry with his own life, and knows he’d never ever do anything that would hurt you, but his protective side is still flaring up.
Only when his girlfriend, Brie, complains of feeling nauseous he curtly nods, and continues heading for the door.
You are again, oblivious to all this, running your fingers along the tattoos exposed on his forearm— his sleeves rolled up to his elbows— putting his gorgeous skin out on display for you.
“I loveee your arms.” You slur, and his eyes shoot from the door back down to you.
He rarely sees you this drunk, and you’re suddenly very close— making comments that for many reasons are bringing a flush to his face.
“Y/N, Jesus you’re hammered.” He shakes his head, still smiling.
He slowly starts walking, “Cmon, let’s go. Y’brother is expecting me to get you back to your room in one piece.”
“You definitely won’t have a drink with me?” You whine, taking a few steps backwards trying to tug him in the direction of the bar instead of the door.
“Nope. Maybe tomorrow if you can even stomach alcohol.” He pushes the doors from the dimly lit bar open, and leads you into the back of the lobby that it’s connected to.
You squint at the dramatic change in lighting, which is hardly helping your sense of perception, or lack thereof, from the alcohol.
Harry’s hand has taken yours though, leading you to an elevator.
You noticed how warm it was, smooth against yours, aside from the rougher pads of his fingers from the years of playing guitar.
Being so off it, you could not keep that thought to yourself.
“Your hands are so soft, H. Like silk.” You say as you walk into the first elevator to open, squeezing his hand.
“First time anyone’s ever told me they feel like silk. I’m flattered.” He smiles, squeezing back.
“what floor are y’on, by the way? D’ya even remember— or are we a bit too wasted for numbers?” A teasing lilt is in his voice.
You half-laugh half-hiccup, “it’s… 7…?”
“You hardly sound certain about that.” He nudges you with a laugh, “It’s 12, we’re on the same one, remember.”
You laugh much harder than any sober person would, which makes it funnier to him. Since it was a mediocre joke at best.
You’re still laughing as you touch his chest with your palm, “you’re not funny.”
His gaze travels down to it, and he’s shocked at how touchy you are. You never do shit like this when you’re sober. His own amusement quickly takes the back seat, even though you’re still giggling.
However your face falls shortly after, laced with a curious gaze as you slide the neck of his long sleeve to the side, in search for the swallows inked onto his collar bones.
He watches as your eyes wander the small expanse of skin there, and how your fingers brush the tattoos.
“Having fun?” He asks, trying to joke again, but really he’s undeniably a little worked up.
“Yah, heaps.” You snap your gaze back up to him as you enthusiastically nod.
He hates the fact he’s blushing so hard right now over this, since you’re drunk and not completely in control, but he at the end of the day is a man with a very pretty girl— which happened to be you— pulling at his top like she wants it off him.
You hum to yourself, “Have such a pretty neck.” And you trail your hand up it, running a finger over his adams apple.
The elevator door opens like a blessing, and he quickly moves to make distance between the two of you.
“Can you remember your room number, darling? That’s one thing I actually don’t know.” He looks to you as you follow him out with clumsy moments.
“Uh… I dunno— wait I think the keycard is in my purse.”
He laughs at this— wondering if it will come to you in time once you sober up.
“Fuckkk.” You groan. “My purse is in Molly’s big handbag.”
The groan soon turns into a whine, because drunk and being slightly inconvenienced is not a good pair.
“It’s ok!” He amends quickly, trying to keep from having a drunken meltdown on his hands, “We’ll just got back to mine, only if you’re comfortable?”
He quickly prepares for you to not want that, “otherwise— I’ll call her, she didn’t seem too wasted, I’m sure she can—“
He’s interrupted by you, “I don’t mind going back with you.”
You say it with a confused look on you face, a tiny pout on your lips.
“Why would I be uncomfortable going with you?”
“Because… well— I’m not sure. I just wanted to leave you with other options.”
It’s not like you haven’t spent time alone together before— you’ve actually spent plenty, but just never with you drunk.
And so touchy.
“No. It’s ok. I love being with you!” You chuckle.
He leads you down the hall, pulling the keycard from his back pocket once he reaches his room, 3313.
The door clicks open, and he holds it open for you, following you in shortly after.
You’re still unstable on your feet, and one look at those heels, he’s surprised you haven’t ended up on the floor in the last ten minutes
They’re practically a health and safety issue. He can not imagine you getting them off right now— which is exactly what you’re about to bend over and attempt.
Before you can throw off your centre of gravity, he quickly says, “Go sit on the bed.”
You glance back over your shoulder, face only lit by the light from the lamp in the corner of the room.
“That’s a little forward, don’t you think, Harry?”
He toes off his own shoes, shaking his head immediately at your drunken misconception of what he asked.
“So I can take your shoes off.”
You make the few steps left to the bed safely, and you sit at the edge of it, still giggling as you say, “just my shoes, huh?”
“Yes.” He walks over, kneeling down on one knee, pulling your heeled foot up onto the strength of his thigh.
He fiddles momentarily with the laced up string, warm hands splayed on your calf, and choosing to ignore the way your dress is riding up your thighs.
Christ. This is harder than he thought.
“I forget how hot you are sometimes.” You deadpan, and his jaw goes a little lax.
You’re usually playful, yes, but never do you breach into territory like this.
It was only others, like those at a family gathering, or your close friends, that would push to get stuff like that out of you like they were matchmakers.
There were many times that barbecues or some kind of event held at yours, Leon would invite Harry over. And if the two of you even interacted for just a second, someone in your family circle would tease you. Especially your own damn brother— it was a constant streamline of snarky comments from him.
“You are so drunk.” He mumble while pulling up your other foot.
You ignore his statement, thinking back to when he was a boy to now. He was cute— always was— but the way he looks now is just unmatchable.
“Have you always looked so… like… this?”
He chuckles, almost nervous, “what does question that even mean?”
“So pretty.” You clarify after a moment of trying to find the word.
“Ah, you’re only saying that because you’re plastered up the walls.” He laughs, and a dimple popped on his cheek, and your hand jumped into action before you could even think about it.
“Noooo, sober me thinks that too. She thinks you’re more than pretty.” You say, cupping his jaw, gently tracing the dimple that popped up.
He doesn’t know how to interpret any of this. His heart is jumping in his chest, and he’s trying to reason its genuinely just the alcohol in your system.
He holds eye contact as he slips off your other shoe, placing in neatly next to the other.
He stays there for a moment, unprepared for your next question.
“Can I kiss you?”
She’s drunk, she’s drunk, she’s drunk…
“You’re drunk, sweetheart.” He says, and it’s painful— because he wants to, so fucking bad, but you’re not in a state to consent to literally anything at the moment.
And especially not in the mind frame to be making decisions like this.
You lean forward anyway, before he has a chance to avoid it, managing to meet his lips on your own terms.
He caved for a brief flash of time, and allows a second for himself to feel it, no longer than that though. Just a mere moment to take in the warm, soft feeling of your lips on his. It takes so much strength for him to not kiss you back, he has to focus on the task at hand— sobering you up and getting you safely asleep.
He pulls back after that single moment, leaving his forehead against yours, “baby, I know, I really…” he cuts himself off.
A deep inhale and he stands up, “Not tonight. Cmon, let’s get you out of your dress. You can wear something of mine.”
He walks over to his suitcase, anything to remove you from his sight for a moment, to reset his thought process. He pulls out a tshirt and pair of gym shorts, hoping they won’t be too big on you.
Turning back around, he convinces himself he’s fine. Placing the clothes from his bag on the bed beside you, his hands come under your arms, helping you stand up on flat feet for the first time in hours.
You lean into the touch, turning around so he can undo the back of your dress.
The feeling of his fingers brushing your back have you going wild, and the way they gently slide the zipper of your dress down.
His eyes lock with the back of your lacy bralette and he chooses not to follow your skin any further down.
You use your hands to slip the straps off your shoulders— and very quickly the dress is pooling at your feet.
A shaky inhale passes through his nose as now you stand in just your underwear and a seemingly very pretty bralette.
He reaches and picks up his shirt from the foot of the bed.
“Do you want to… take this off before…?” He gestures to your bralette when he catches your eyes.
You nod, reaching behind you to undo the clasp and allowing it to slip from your shoulders to the floor.
Harry puts all his focus on getting the tshirt over your head to cover you up.
Once it’s over your whole frame, you can’t help but smile.
He’s so nervy and cute around you.
“Thanks, Harry.” You smile, suddenly feeling an overwhelming amount of adoration for him hit you.
It inflated up in your chest, and bubbled deep into the pit of your stomach.
It killed Harry to watch it happen, and although he had no idea what kind of thoughts were going on in your head, just seeing you light up like that…
You wrapped your arms around his middle again, just like you did when you ran up to him in the bar.
He placed his hands in your hair this time, taking in your scent— which was mixing with his own now that your were in his shirt.
“Love, if you were sober right now. God.” He confesses.
“Im sober enough.” You beg, even though it’s such a lie.
He still shakes his head against you, “‘M not gonna be that guy, Y/N. I have waited years just to have you. I can wait another night. Or week. Or a whole ‘nother year if that’s what it takes.”
This hits you hard.
And it felt like your 15 year old self could hear it up in the confines of your head it rung through you that loudly.
She loved him then, more than she’d ever admit. And sure, you’ve grown up from 15, but yet never once did you grow out of him.
As noted earlier, being drunk and inconvenienced is not a good pair. But being drunk and having someone say or do something sentimental like that is another level.
Tears immediately start to fall from your eyes, and he feels your chest shake at the sudden outburst of emotion.
He pulls back, thinking he’s done something wrong, or said the wrong thing, and an apology was immediately on the tip of his tongue.
But relief thrums through him as you tug him right back into the hug, “that’s— that’s the nicest thing anyone’s ever said to me.”
“The nicest thing a boys ever told me.”
“Sweetheart.” He coos as you cry, his own voice wobbly with emotion.
He feels like he’s on a roller coaster. 5 minutes ago it seemed all he could think about was the unspeakable things wanted to do to you, and now he just wants to lay you down and hold you until you fall asleep.
He forgets the shorts on the foot of the bed, shuffling the two of you up to where the head of it is— which was still unmade from last night when he’d slept in it.
He tugs you into it, pulling you tightly too his chest as your heads hit the pillows.
And he just hugs you.
Eventually, your crying subsides off, and you enter an indescribably calm state.
“I love you. I don’t even know if you’re going to remember this in the morning.” He sighs, “but fuck, I love you.”
“I love you too, Harry.” You whisper, before your eyes begin to fall heavy, and those words were the last to leave your lips before you fell asleep.
———
PART II, found here
a/n pt2:
back again guys, hello!
this is like an extended a/n, but I have a lil update. I saw harry for the very first time live 3 weeks ago. it was so so incredible, and the experience was by far the best time of my life. I miss harry so much i just feel sick ugh. he is perfect. auslot was amazing, he absolutely gave us his all.
that’s why I’ve been so absent on here, literally coping with my pcd a day at a time. I’ve written heaps but nothing I’m 100% happy with haha.
but anyways I just thought I’d share, thank you so much for your continued support and know there is plenty in the works x
all my love, <3
#harry styles#harry styles imagine#harry styles oneshot#best friend!harry#fanfiction#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles fluff#harry styles x reader#harry styles x y/n#best friends brother#harry styles smut#harry styles writing#harry styles x you#best friends to lovers#friends to lovers#drunk! y/n
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𝓣𝓱𝓮 𝓒𝓱𝓪𝓲𝓷 𝓗𝓮𝓪𝓭𝓬𝓪𝓷𝓸𝓷𝓼- 𝖕𝖆𝖗𝖙 1
These are from the FinalPromise!Au. Some will be directly from the og Linked Universe, as I don't envision my story as straying tooooo far from the original. I might add more in the future, but these are the ones that I am thinking of for now! This is part 1/3, which includes Time, Twilight, and Wild! :3
Warnings: mention of scars
⋆。°✩
𝖙𝖎𝖒𝖊
Mans in his early 30s in terms of appearance (actual age is unclear)
Speaks Hylian well but writing? Not so much. Growing up in Kokiri Forest doesn't really help in terms of school smarts, so he had Wars and Sky teach him a bit later down the line.
Has a slight Southern accent, way less prominent than Twilight's though. It comes out more when he's tired or being more flirty (Or doing it on purpose to fluster Y/n.)
Him and Malon are exes? It was a situationship, they didn't really put a word on it. She was there after his quest to support him and keep a roof over his head. They're more like family/friends now
Very tall. We're talking over 6 foot here, and he will also use that to tower over Y/n. They're into that
Also pretty muscular. He was more lean muscle when he was a teen/young adult, but he's bulked up especially since donning the armor.
Has rib tattoos, similar to the Deity markings on his face.
Only has his lobes pierced, however he wants to experiment with more piercings like Twilight.
Has some scarring on his stomach from the battle at the Water Temple, its faded over the years but its still noticeable if you look hard enough
Doesn't sleep well, so takes over night watch a lot. Twilight has to stop him from not sleeping for over 48-hours as that gets him into dangerous mental space territory.
I wanna say he's one of the first member of the chain to feel something for Y/n. I see a lot of pics placing him last usually, but I feel like he's one of the first, especially having tons of time to think about it at night and being the eldest.
Although he's one of the earliest to reveal his feelings to Y/n, he's still processing and taking it slow in terms of bringing it up to the rest of the group.
𝖙𝖜𝖎𝖑𝖎𝖌𝖍𝖙
Time's his great great grandfather?? Some great, he's not quite sure
Twilight's in his early/mid 20's
His hair is a brown-gray mix, the grey becoming more prominent ever since his first time shifting into his Wolf form.
Southern drawl, need I say more
Ears are pierced, has double lobe piercings and an upper cartilage piecing
Pretty tall, close to 6 foot, maybe 5' 11"
Other than the Twili markings on his face, he has a small tattoo of a hoof to commemorate for Epona on his ankle
His markings do extend down his spine and upper arms which make a delicious sight when he's training or above Y/n
Some scarring on his legs and arms from his journey, one longer scar on his right ear from a close call with a Twilight creature once.
Senses are like tripled ever since becoming Wolfie, mr. cowboy can smell things like a mile away.
Similar to Time in terms of build, maybe slightly leaner because of his height
However his voice is the deepest of the group. Mans got the range in octaves and that sexy rasp that he will use to his advantage
Like his ancestor, one of the first to have/admit feelings toward Y/n
However, having a Wolf form also speeds up the feelings of protectiveness obsessiveness... and certain other things.
Has such a sweet tooth.
Loves chocolate so much but ever since Wolfie happened, he can barely eat any 'cause he got that dog in him
Protective of Wild too, other than Y/n, he's probably the only other person that knows what he's been through
𝖜𝖎𝖑𝖉
18-19 years old, his adventure has just recently finished
His hair is longer than in his quest to save the princess, though definitely more choppy and wolf cut-like when not in his ponytail
Definitely more lean muscle in terms of build, and is probably average in height
Has triple pieced lobes and a few cartilage piercings, plans on getting more
Left side of his body is heavily scarred, partially deaf in his left ear. Also tends to lose feeling in his left arm and leg, so he prefers to use his right side
Can actually read and speak Hylian How do you think he read everyone's diaries
As we all know, he's one of the best cooks in Hyrule and can cook almost anything, but his favorite thing to make has got to be meat curry and a simple nut cake.
After you came along and introduced him to your foods??? Oh boy he's never been so excited-
Somehow made your favorite foods better than they already were
Closer with Twilight and Legend
Takes longer to catch feelings for you, as the mere concept of feeling toward another person is still a confusing topic for him since his slumber
One of the last ones to catch feelings for you, partially in denial because his belief of not being good enough for you/being very harsh on himself
Twilight almost immediately catches onto Wild's attraction towards you, Wild's not the best at masking nervousness around you
⋆。°✩
#yandere linked universe#yandere linked universe x reader#linked universe x reader#linked universe au#linked universe headcanons#final promise au
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i haven’t played p5/r in a while so forgive me that this entire thing is mostly off dome.
what i mean when i say “ryuji is the heart of the phantom thieves” is that i do genuinely believe that he is the glue that holds them together. without him, the group inarguably loses its charm, and would simply not function without him there. he’s outspoken, protective, and might be the only one who i feel has a genuine love toward every member of the group.
i need to replay to do a whole thinkpiece, but for now i do want to share the ryuji moments i remember the most, and why they are part of the concrete evidence that shows ryuji is the most important piece of the phantom thieves.
first of all:
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such a casual dialogue that is amplified by a thousand simply because of ryuji’s unadulterated love for his friend… i am moved to tears by this interaction. i love him very much, and he is near and dear to the deepest parts of my heart.
secondly:
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i admit im not in the know about a lot of persona fandom stuff, but i personally don’t see a lot of people talk about this? ignore joker on the right this ain’t about him. this is, i think, the first of many instances in which u notice how quickly ryuji jumps to defend his friends, namely his female friends, and it’s a huge part of him that draws me to his character.
since it’s atlus, it’s not hard to miss that ryuji is definitely victim to their “perverted male character” trope, but for me, the moments where ryuji is having genuine thought put behind his character, are the moments when he so intensely - and is usually the first to - defend the other phantom thieves.
another example:
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the phantom thieves are each others biggest support system, as they’re a team, but ryuji is definitely the one we see show that off the most. i will not be going into details as this is all off the top of my head, but trust me i am thinking about his confidant and backstory as i write all of this out.
more:
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this has always been on my mind as well, because not a day goes by where i don’t think about how quickly ryuji reassures his friends, since they r the most important people to him in his life.
more and more:
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a less serious one, but i do genuinely enjoy the thought of ryuji just bragging about his friends because of how cool he thinks they are. when i say ryuji is the most obvious about how much he loves them, i am deathly serious. that is his family.
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was excited to include this as well, as it goes to show even people ryuji has only known for a month are still worth going to war for. ryuji holds such an affection for his friends that it’s like i don’t even have to say more. he is literally speaking for himself here. i will never understand how anyone could dislike someone so passionate for the happiness of their own friends?
lastly:
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i am personally not a huge fan of the negative dynamic atlus likes to portray between ryuji and morgana a lot of the time, so this is why this frenzy(?) is one of my favorites in p5d. morgana is the character ryuji fights with the most, and yet when morgana is feeling dejected, ryuji is there to pick him back up. obviously i know this is how the dance works and whatnot, but u cannot lie and tell me ryuji making him happy again didn’t make u almost cry a bit… it’s okay, i did too…
conclusion:
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this ryuji shit gets serious, be prepared to die behind it.
#persona 5#persona 5 royal#ryuji sakamoto#can u tell i love ryuji#he is a mamas boy of course he respects women
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Dreamers & Delusions- Pt. 8
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merman x female reader
After you finally agreed to live with Tao he told you to take a few days to heal up. You were worried that you'd get fired from your job being out so long but apparently on his little jog out to get you clothes he also stopped by the diner.
He informed Mikey that you won't be back in for a few days due to your injuries. He also mentioned that he may or may not have threatened him after he said some horrible things about you under breath. Apparently Jes was there to stop him from beating Mikey black and blue.
You spent the first day just lounging about in the nest room, reading your romance novels you've stashed away at Tao's. He had to go back to the beach to asses the damage and help with clean up. When he came home he looked drained but quickly perked up when he saw that you made dinner
The second day Jes came to visit and the two of you talked up a storm.
"Girl you are so lucky to be alive right now! You could have fucking died!" She shakes you before giving you a rib crushing hug.
"I know, I know. I just couldn't be there anymore, I needed to get away," You cry against her shoulder and sigh.
You give Jes the run down of that fateful night and leave nothing out. She listens, shaking her head here and there and holding back tears when you talk about how terrified you were.
"And I've been here since. I don't know if he's told you, but I'm moving in with him," you tell her as you wipe your eyes with your sleeve.
"I think that's for the best, but what about... well, you haven't been to keen on getting any closer to him because of the... you know, mates subject," She sighs and scrubs her face.
"I'm trying not to think about it. I'll still keep him at a healthy distance, even though he seems to want the opposite. Not sure if he's taking this fake dating seriously or if he's just being over protective of me because he sees me as his shoal mate," you shrug.
Jes' brows hike up her forehead and she grins, "Shoal mate?"
"Like werewolves have pack members Jes, nothing special," you glare.
"Sure sure, and I'm guessing all those clothes and lacy things aren't special either?" Her grin widens.
"Jes, no. He's just being nice, he even said it was because I didn't have anything to wear and all," you roll your eyes and groan. "Besides he would probably buy even more expensive clothes for his mate, treat her even better and all. I'm just practice, that's all I'm ever good for."
Without warning a hand clamps down on your face and shakes you, "You listen and you listen good, I am sick and tired of hearing your woe was me bullshit! You are kind, smart, dependable, funny as fuck, and loving as hell and if no one can see that in you, they don't fucking deserve you. Tao included ok?"
You nod your head and whimper, "But when he finds her won't h-"
"And what if you are her? What then?" She asks you.
"How can it be me though? There's been no sign, no marks, no moment where we look deep into each others eyes and just 'know'. There's nothing Jes, just two friends who are fake dating," you start blubbering, tears rolling down your cheeks again.
You've bottled up these emotions for days now, unable to vent them since you're in the same living space with the merman who's causing them. You needed this, needed to talk to Jes and just let it all out.
"A part of me wishes he wasn't so goddamn nice to me ya know. Like it'd be so much easier to fall out of love with him. And now look at me, I'm about to move in with him because it's safer here than with my own fucking family. I can't win Jes, I can't," you sob into your hands and she pulls you in for a hug.
"You'll be alright sugar, maybe not now but eventually. I'm not going to sugar coat shit and say things will be fine because I'm no fortune teller girly. This is going to be a fucking journey, but it's all about how you navigate until you reach the end. Nobody needs to get hurt ok?" Jes pulls back and wipes a tear from your cheek. "But if he does hurt you, I will be more than happy to put my foot up where the sun don't shine."
You manage a teary chuckle and nod, "Thanks for being real Jes. I guess I needed to hear that and not some fake positivity bull shit."
"I don't do that wishy washy fake support girly, I tell it like it is," she grins and winks.
After you calm down Jes segues the conversation from you and Tao to her and her wild fae fiancé. You start cackling when she tells you about the gifts they've already received from friends and family. Apparently it's common practice to gift some fun things for the bedroom before the wedding so they can enjoy them afterward. Jes admits that she's lost count of how many of these gifts she has received.
"But here's the real kicker, because he's a wild fae our wedding has to be officiated by a wild fae who has worked law between both worlds for it to be legal in both," Jes sneers and tosses her hand back and forth.
"Won't that kind of be near impossible? Aren't wild fae against going into law? I thought they'd be more free spirited?" You try to imagine someone with wild hair and wild magic working in a court of law and quickly shake your head.
"That's what I thought, but there's one. Just one, fresh out of college too. He has a degree in law in both worlds. His name is Varen, very straight laced and way too normal for anyone to look at him and think wild fae. But Artek told me that this kid's one hundred percent a wild fae, could tell by the ebb and flow of his magic," She explains and goes into greater detail about this weird wild fae.
That conversation lead to another and another, talking and bitching turned to joking over lunch and eventually, like all good things, ended after cake. Jes left and you felt lighter though the dread stayed pooled in the pits of your stomach. It was manageable now, but still there.
You distract yourself by starting on dinner. You take it easy as to not overdo it and reopen any wounds again. You've splashed some healing potion on yourself this morning but should probably cleanse yourself with another dose soon.
Little by little you get everything together and toss it into the oven. Easy, simple bake for a dinner. While it does its own thing you whisk away to the bathroom and quickly strip as you run the bathwater. You've just finished pouring the potion into the bath when the door flies open haphazardly and Tao freezes.
You can't help but to laugh especially when he attempts to close the door that keeps slipping from his grasp.
"Dude you've seen me naked probably a dozen times now, nothing you haven't seen," you plop into the bath, still laughing.
You hear the door shut and Tao sighing and to your surprise you see him sitting right at the closed door. He looks a bit roughed up and tired as hell.
"Tough day at work," you ask as you settle in for a soak.
Tao groans, "Tough would be an understatement. Two vacant houses tumbled and shattered onto the beach during the storm. We started out with plenty of volunteers but once they realized how much work goes into the clean up, well we lost a good sixty percent."
"Sixty percent?!" you turn and nearly slip against the tub.
"And if that wasn't bad enough, a certain someone came to the beach looking for you," he adds with disgust that he doesn't even attempt to hide.
"You've gotta be shitting me... She came to the fucking beach after all that had happened?" you ask.
"She was cordial at first since there was a lot of people but when I wasn't giving her the answers she wanted she started saying horrific things about you in relation to, well, to us," he says.
You know how unhinged your grandmother can be with insults and name calling but to slander you or Tao, especially Tao, in public, that was crossing a whole new fucking line.
"What did she say?" you grit your teeth and exhale, trying to remain calm.
Tao doesn't say anything, but you hear him clear his throat and shift. You turn in the tub, keeping low enough that only your shoulders and up are visible, "Tao, what did she say?"
He looks at you and looks down, "She said a great deal of things that I am very certain would cause you to become quite enraged."
"I need something a little more specific buddy. How bad was it?" you keep pushing, knowing that Tao isn't fully comfortable with this but you need to know.
"I'm not sure if I-"
"If I promise to remain calm will you fucking tell me at least one goddamn thing she said?" you nearly yell, starting to get frustrated.
Tao's eyes widen but he nods his head, "She said...well she compared you to your mother saying that you're some slut for dating me and that I'm some freak with a human woman fetish that's lowering whatever qualities about you that would be desirable to human males."
You promised to remain calm, and you're no liar. Instead you start getting out of the tub. You quickly wrap a towel around yourself before Tao can say anything but to your surprise he seems rather speechless. His eyes are back onto the floor and there's this limpness to him. You squat down next to him and he doesn't flinch.
"There's more to this isn't there?" you ask.
"I couldn't say anything... I couldn't defend you or she'd know where you were. I wanted to tear her apart so bad, not physically of course, but I wanted her to know how wrong she was," Tao admits.
You lean up against him and he stiffens a bit before relaxing. He smells of the beach and whatever trash was on beach and it makes you crinkle your nose.
"I'm going to go get dressed and finish up dinner while you take a much needed shower. Let's try to get me moved in asap. I don't think I can tolerate my grandmother any longer," you shimmy up against the door to stand up as Tao shoves up and wobbles.
He seems a little off but mostly tired.
"Try to get some rest tonight ok? We have plenty of time to talk till we both pass out," you smile at him before leaving to go get dressed.
You throw on some comfy pajama bottoms that Jes bought for you and a large shirt that Tao had got you with all the other clothes. You slip into some comfy slides and head to the kitchen to check on dinner. It's a simple chicken bake that your older brother used to make and it made you feel like a normal kid when you ate it.
You wanted to share with Tao a taste of your world since the both of you always cooked his style. It's not that he can't eat or doesn't like to eat normal human food, it's just that you've been busy practicing his style for a while now.
It's just chicken breasts baked over carrots and potatoes that you've oiled and seasoned properly, but this was the one thing that kept you going on the hard days. You made it for your younger siblings when your brother got older and left, but it was never quite as good as his.
You start prepping some broccoli to go with it, something you added so everyone could get their vegies. You can't help but to smile when you think of your little sister grimacing when she took her first bite of broccoli. You had to convince her that they were tiny trees and she'd become a giant if she ate them. Before you left home, she admitted that it didn't work but she knew you were trying so she kept eating them even if she still didn't like them. Hearing that almost made you break down in tears.
You oil up the pan and turn to grab the broccoli when you run right into Tao.
"You have got to start warning me when you enter a room dude, this is going to keep happening if you don't," you laugh.
Tao chuckles and holds your arm, "I'll try to remember that for next time. How are your wounds?"
"Itchy," you shrug, "But manageable. How about you? How are you feeling?"
"I'm...," He pauses and sighs. "Tired, tired and drained. All I want to do is bury myself in a pile of blankets and pillows and pretend that the rest of the world doesn't exist for a while."
You want to laugh because you've been there, and you feel like this isn't the first time Tao has felt like this but it's the first time he's expressed it.
"Well how about we do just that after dinner ok? I could do with wrapping myself up in that fluffy green blanket like a lettuce wrap," you giggle.
Tao gives you a soft smile and nods, "Sounds like a plan."
His hand roves up from your forearm and to your shoulder, your heart pounding a mile a minute until his nose crinkles and he nearly shoves you away as he picks up the smoking oiled pan off the stove top.
You try to apologize but Tao stops you saying it's his fault he distracted you. He offers to help with the last bit of dinner but you stubbornly decline and banish him to the barstools.
The chicken bake finishes just as you toss the broccoli into the newly oiled pan and you hush up Tao when he offers to help again.
"Can't make you a thank you dinner if you keep trying to help now can I?" you poke at him.
"Wait, what do you mean?" he asks, almost shocked.
"I thought I'd make you something from my world as a thank you... Like we're always cooking stuff from the little book you made me or stuff based on that so I thought I'd try something different...," you feel your heart sinking a bit at how silly you sound.
You should have asked instead of jumping into this, should have double checked and now you're probably just cooking for yourself because he probably won't want t-
"I can't wait to try it then," he says.
You look up, realizing that you had been looking down at the broccoli and were probably about to salt it with your tears.
"It's nothing fancy, just a chicken bake my older brother used to make for me when I was a kid," you smile.
He smiles back and yawns looking more tired than usual, "Like I said, I can't wait to try it."
You feel your cheeks heat and your heart flutter but it doesn't last long as you mentally dunk yourself into cold water.
Just a friend, just a friend...
Shaking yourself out of your girly lovey dove self you focus on finishing dinner. As simple as it is you want to make it especially presentable. You give Tao two chicken breasts and a good helping of carrots, potatoes and broccoli. You wanted to serve dinner rolls with it but you had polished them off a couple nights ago.
Tao is unable to stay seated much longer and takes the plates to the one place you'd thought they'd be forbidden from entering, the nest room. Though not without trays which he asks you to bring. You grab them along with some bottles of water and the dessert Jes had brought earlier from the diner.
Tao has you set the trays and things down at the doorway so you can hold the plates. You watch with bated breath as his claw slowly slices through the air, dragging golden glowing ruins with it. The room shifts and the nest room transforms into something akin to a magical pillow fort. The plates you're holding float out of your hands and the trays fly up to support them.
You look down for the dessert and waters but they had already transported to Tao's hands. He smiles again and gestures for you to follow him into the pillow fort.
He plops down onto a beanbag that you had no idea was even in the room and the tray lands gracefully on his lap. You follow suit and snuggle up into a pile of pillows with your tray landing next to you.
"I gotta say Tao, had I known you as a kid I would have invited you over to build pillow forts and hang out because this is fucking nice," you joke.
Tao doesn't say anything because all of his focus and attention went straight into the dinner you had made. Though he's tired, his eyes turn solid black as he rips into the chicken like a beast. It's no feeding frenzy like he did at your grandmother's house, no he still seems conscience.
You take his silence and focus on the meal as a complement and tuck into your on plate. As you eat you realize that it's still not quite like your brother's.
Guess I'll have to hunt him down and shake that recipe out of him one of these days.
You're halfway down eating when you feel Tao snuggling up to you. You glance over at him, his eyes still all black.
"If you're still fully aware in there let me finish eating dude," you tell him.
Tao grunts which you suppose is a good sign as he slinks down and lays next to you. You stab at your food and eat as slowly as possible hoping that Tao will just pass out while waiting for you.
You're not against platonic cuddling or whatever sharky merfolk due to stay warm, but you need some distance. You need to be a little colder until you've sorted your feelings out.
He's been so good to you, kind and caring that it hurts more and more as the days pass and you haven't even officially moved in yet. You keep things as professional as you can but he keeps doing things like buying you snacks and little gifts like candles and bubble bath stuff.
It drives you absolutely crazy because you know this isn't going to last, that even though you'll still be shoal mates and all, you won't be anything more than just that.
You finish eating and check to see if Tao had passed out. Once you're certain he's asleep you clean up the pillow fort and take everything to the kitchen as quietly as possible. You shake your head and almost cry as you laugh about hanging out with Tao in a pillow fort.
If you weren't in love with him you'd probably have a blast. You'd probably try to wake his ass up and try to teach him some games the both of you could play.
But you're in love with him and he's tired. You're tired too.
You had allowed yourself to laze about while physically healing but mentally and emotionally you still feel like your wounds are wide open and bleeding all over the place.
Tip toeing back to the nest room, you quickly swipe the fluffy green blanket and a couple pillows to take back to the living room. You toss yourself onto the leather loveseat and curl into a ball before passing out.
~~~~~~
Tao:
My eyes feel crusted and practically glued together when I wake up. I'm cold even though I'm wrapped up in a heavy blanket. I reach out to get a feel of my surroundings when my memories of last night start flooding in. I snap up and and furiously wipe my eyes till I can open them.
The nest room is as I remembered, magicked into a cave of pillows and blankets but absent of a certain someone. I quickly untangle myself from the blankets and nearly trip as I make my way out of the room.
I search the nearby rooms to check for her before heading to the kitchen. My heart sinks when I peer into the living room and find her curled up on the couch. I quietly pad my way over to her and I fall to my knees when I see notice the tears stained on her face and the puffiness of her eyes.
Had she spent the entire night out here alone crying her eyes out?
I grab a fistful of my hair as I try to wrack my brain for anything I might have done to upset her. I start to worry if I offended her with the way that I ate last night, I did try my best to suppress my instincts. I know that going into a feeding frenzy can disgust humans but she's been fine with it before.
My heart starts racing and I can hardly breathe as I continue to spiral into a state of panic. I'm obviously not quiet about it because she stirs then shoots straight up. I hear her worrying over me, her warm hands cupping my cheek so gently. Without think I hold her hand in place as if I'm afraid this will be the last time she touches me.
Her thumb soothes short lines near my eye and I feel myself slowly calming down to the point that I almost doze off again. She keeps talking but it's muffled. She tries to pull her hand away then and I snap out of whatever trance I was in.
"Tao, you need to go in the tank dammit! You're dry as a bone!" she yells at me.
It takes a moment for my mind and body to sync up and that's when I realize the severe discomfort my skin is in. Not just my skin but my mouth feels sticky and my gills are on fire. I stumble as I stand, no longer operating on anxious energy. It's so difficult to move, to breathe in this state.
I haven't neglected myself like this in ages and now I'm doing it in front of her. For a moment I think she might scold me, rage at how stupid I was for not taking better care of myself until I feel her small hand at the mid of my back.
Slowly she helps me to the hatch, my breathing becoming more and more labored with each step. My gills feel stuck and itchy to the point of sheer madness. I try my best not to scratch at them in fear of them becoming raw.
She sits me down on one of the benches and helps me out of my shirt. For a moment I think that it's kind of her to help me out like this until I remember that I'm wearing pants too.
In a sudden bout of panic I shoot up and kick the hatch open. I hear her talking but not a single word is registering. I quickly start stripping my pants off and before she can see anything I try to dive into my tank but trip over my own feet. I nearly miss the edge when I hit the water and thank the goddesses I made it before I feel unconscious.
There's a weight on my shoulder, a stinging pain too. I suppose I did hit myself but not as bad. I peel open my eyes in horror when I see my shoal mate's limp body slowly floating away from me with blood trailing from her head.
~~~~~~
You could see Tao struggling and you tried to stop him before he hurt himself, instead you ended up bonking your fucking head on the edge of the hatch. It stings like a bitch from the saltwater so you must have sliced it on impact.
But you quickly shove that though from your mind because you're underwater and you're breathing somehow. Memories flood back and you recall holding onto to his shoulder for dear life and Tao pulling you in and how his mouth opened yours up so he could breathe for you. He said something and you nodded before passing out again. He most likely cast a spell to allow you to breathe under water then.
You slowly open your eyes but there's not much to behold. The tank is dark save for the light near the surface. You feel around yourself and notice something smooth nearby. You give it a good poke a guess by the texture and smooshiness of it that it's Tao's tail. Suddenly you're being pulled against him, his nose nuzzling against your ear and his claws rest gently against your bare skin.
"You scared me half to death," he groans, his voice hoarse.
"Ditto dude, you were having a full blown panic attack. What happened?" you ask as bubbles exit your mouth. You have a good idea based on how he's responded to anything you do in the past but it doesn't hurt to check.
Tao's claws twitch and he hums, "I was worried that I had offended you somehow. When I awoke, you were not in the nest."
"You didn't do anything wrong Tao, I just... I needed some space. That and uhh...," You pause, knowing it's now or never and decide to rip it off like a band aid. "You don't have to keep up the fake dating act when we're alone. I mean whenever you find your mate or something I think you'll do good."
You continue to praise him and how he'll make someone super happy one of these days while doing your damndest to mask the ache in your heart. You slip up though and your voice cracks but you laugh it off or at least try to.
The slip doesn't go unnoticed and Tao pulls you into his arms again, crushing you against his body. You're stiff yet somehow you're trembling as he cradles your head and gently kisses your cheek. He doesn't say anything really but you do hear him purr. It's a low thrumming sound and it's oddly soothing.
"We were supposed to relax and pretend as if the world did not exist in the nest room. I ruined that by allowing my instincts to take over again," He says remorsefully.
"No you didn't Tao, I just... I needed space and... you've been great, maybe too great. It just feels wrong somehow to keep up the fake dating act twenty four seven. It's been messing with my head so much so that, I don't know... I just think we should tone it down and just be friends when no one is looking," you bury your face against his chest and sigh.
Tao taps his claws against the back of your head as his purring somehow intensifies, "Then how has it been messing with your head? Did I do something to overstep any boundaries?"
It's a genuine question, you know it is but it irritates you because it's digging so close to the truth, "You haven't overstepped anything, if anyone did that would be me. You've been nothing but kind and respectful and all that and it's been making me think how great it would be if there was someone who could treat me like you do but they actually loved me."
That last part stings your soul because you don't want just anybody, you want Tao.
Without thinking you keep blubbering on, your emotions taking charge now, "And then I started thinking how nice it would be if I was your mate, not just shoal mate, but that'd never happen. So I just kept telling myself we're friends and that you'll eventually find your fated mate and I'll be tossed aside. So I've been trying my best to shut those feelings off, to put some distance between us but somehow someway we keep coming into contact with each other."
At this point your laughing, possibly crying but it's too hard to tell since you're still underwater. Tao holds you even tighter, pulling you up until your chin rests on his shoulder.
"I pray to the goddesses every night that I never meet my fated mate or that I will have the strength to reject her if we do meet," he admits.
"Why would you do that?" you ask with a broken voice.
"Because I want to choose my mate and fated mates among merfolk are rare anyways. I came to this world for a new life, I can't hold onto old traditions and wishful thinking," he answers, his claws once again tapping the back of your head.
"Did you decide this because you've already chose someone?" The question slips and Tao's fingers still against you.
His purring is so loud now and his heartbeat is thrumming against it. He doesn't say anything for a minute but then nods, "Yes, I suppose I have."
You go limp in his hold for a second before looking up at him. His golden eyes glow in the darkness and his hair moves in waves around his head like an inky crown. He looks more feral at this moment than he does when his instincts kick in. For a moment you're terrified of the question fighting its way out but when he touches your arm oh so gently is just flies out.
"Who is it? Who did you chose?"
#monster boyfriend#monster x girl#monster x human#monster x reader#monster lover#merman#Tao the merman#merman x reader#monster romance#merman boyfriend#monster love#merman x female reader#monster boyfriend oc#monster bf#slow burn#slow burn romance
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What's in a Name? (Sazanami Clan)
Sincerely sorry for spamming you, dear void. Think of this as a purge of ideas that have been percolating around for a while but were never given time until now. Anyway, let's take a look at the kanji meanings for the Sazanami clan members' names! ( •̀ ω •́ )✧
Much like parents creating a name for their children, authors often put their wishes and intentions for the character into the name selection process. Kagurabachi is no different- the Saznami's names showcase how much thought Hokazono put into creating the characters to fit seamlessly into the story.
I'm not a pro at Japanese so these interpretations are based off of a lot of research only.
Without further ado:
漣 (sazanami, most commonly read as ren) means "ripple". An indirect reference to the inherited isou technique that uses shock waves?
More rarely, it can also mean crying or continuously flowing tears. A hint towards the horrible legacy they've got as a clan, perhaps.
Sazanami Kyora (漣 京羅) - Bizarre name.
京 (kyo) directly means capital city and is often used as shorthand for Kyoto city itself (京都). 羅 (ra) is for lightweight fabrics like silk or gauze... a surface reading is kinda weird. His name is "silk capital", huh...
In a name, 京 (kyo) can confer both grandeur and power. 羅 (ra) can confer the idea of a protective net, or a link of unity and strength. So in my mind, Kyora is meant to be the powerful, uniting force that protects. Protects what? Certainly not his kids! GOTTEM
Sazanami Soya (漣 宗也) - Soya is a special guy for many reasons... 宗 (usually read as mune) is associated with respect for family, ancestry, and following the teachings of a founder (in a religious sense). The so reading is actually pretty rare and means "origin" or "virtuous ancestor". In general it conveys a sense of the child being expected to honor the family's ancestors, legacy, and perhaps being the start of something new and special. Good good this is fine.
也 is pretty interesting too. It's archaic, for one. Thus making it a strange choice for a modern name. The most common readings of 也 (nari and ya) mean "to be" in the sense that something is certain to happen/occur, but there's also a less common one used here (ya) that is questioning- like "will it be?" or "is it"? And when it's included in a name, 也 (ya) often takes on a meaning like "also". In an abstract sense, ya here implies excitement for the baby being born, so at least he's got that going for him.
So IMO the most direct meaning of 宗也 (soya) is "another origin" in reference to his "love" being what helps Hakuri overcome Soya himself and start down his new path, with strong implications that he was expected to honor his family's tradition... but maybe wouldn't be able to. Cool stuff! And really depressing in the context that he was chosen to be the next head of the family! Did his parents not have high hopes for him for some reason? Imagine naming your kid "baby we're excited to have that will respectfully carry on our family legacy" while also throwing it in doubt by deliberately using an archaic kanji lol. Soya never had a chance.
Is that why he treated Hakuri the way he did once his little bro failed to manifest the talent he was assumed to have...?
Sazanami Hakuri (漣 伯理) Our favorite former boyfailure sure has an interesting name...
伯 (haku) means someone with a position of high authority like "chief", "earl", or "count". In a name, it conveys a sense of respect and admiration being due as the highest ranked person in the family. What audacity lmao. I think it's interesting that the middle child was given this name since haku also implies being obligated respect and admiration as the eldest brother/role model of the family. Should his and Soya's names have been swapped?
理 (ri) means reason/logic... and less often, justice or truth. It's interesting that this character was used instead of the more common 裡 (ri) that usually composes the full name (伯裡). This character is for something in the rear or the middle, inside or within- implying they're protected or sheltered. Name implications of 裡 carry connotations of inner strength, security, and comfort; a sense of belonging and connection. ...Things our Hakuri notably lacks. He was never meant to be a strong leader secure in his relationships and protected from harm, I guess. So let's look at why 理 might have been chosen instead.
There are many possible implications when 理 used in a name, but most of them imply that the child will be guided or helped along in a positive way. Whether by order and structure, logic and wisdom, deep empathy... any or all of them. So his name is something like "logical/natural chief" with the implication that something will guide his path through life. Fortunately for him and us, it happens to be empathy (RIP Ice Lady). Not escaping the swapped names theories though since Soya was supposed to be the logical, calculating oldest brother chosen to lead the clan. Hmm.
With all that context, this panel just makes me so... something:
Is there more to unpack with the Sazanamis after all? Is leadership a meritocracy or something? Because normally you'd expect the oldest son to have the duty passed on to him. Yet I'm not confident that Soya was always the first choice now.
But yeah, with a name like that, no wonder we see him being called special by Kyora at such a young age- Hakuri had a lot placed on his shoulders at birth. It makes me curious as to why he was apparently seen as a better prospect than Soya, but we'll probably never get the details.
Sazanami Tenri (漣 天理) - Another guy with a unisex name that leans feminine lol. Even more parallels to Chihiro!
A lot of fellow anime and manga fans will probably be familiar with 天 (ten)- meaning heaven, sky, sometimes God. No surprises there. 理 (ri) - the same one used in Hakuri's name- once again means reason/logic, and less often, justice or truth. In names, 天 (ten) also adds a sense of natural talent or gifts the child is born with (and we do see Tenri becoming the youngest member of the Tou ever, so he certainly was born with something special like his father claimed).
理 (ri) implications hurt my heart. He was also named with great expectations placed on him, but at least it's a relatively common name unlike his older brothers'.
I think a common, straightforward interpretation is usually best so "heaven's natural law" is the meaning I'd ascribe. But I do like the optional interpretation of "heaven's judgement" being there to echo Mr. Inazuma's "lightning of judgement" that Chihiro delivered on his behalf. Just a fun little thing for me to gnaw on. The additional naming implications make me think he was supposed to be guided by his natural talents to a bright future, but... well...
I kind of want a side story or episode zero about Kyora, Mrs. Sazanami, Tenri, Hakuri, and Soya before Hakuri was ostracized now. Why were they named like this?! Hakuri and Soya in particular have me going insane over implications for their relationship and why Soya might have been so cruel to him...
Anyway, thanks as always for letting me rant in your ambivalent ears, kind internet void. I'll be able to ride out the last hour or so of waiting for spoilers in peace thanks to you.
#kagurabachi#sazanami hakuri#kyora sazanami#soya sazanami#tenri sazanami#This was originally going to be for every named character but I don't have the strength#Might do Team Goldfish if I don't get smote for spamming the tags with my bullshit#Now you know why チヒ伯 gets auto-translated to Count Chihi
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In my post Johnny, Robby, and the "family" (s6 part 2), I talked about Johnny still not being ready to fulfill the needs of his biological kids. I said the following:
Johnny is not codependent in his relationship with Robby, so Robby doesn't get the open "love" and "caring" that Miguel and Carmen get from Johnny.
Johnny is incapable of healthy relationships. He's caught between two extremes: He's codependent with the Diazs, while he neglects and abuses Robby. These relationships also aren't independent of each other. Johnny is still choosing Miguel/Diazs over Robby, as part 2 continues to show.
In s6e10, when Chozen said to Daniel and Johnny that Sam and Robby need their senseis and need their fathers, Johnny's expression was one of worry or self-reflection.
Johnny keeps failing to be there for Robby as he needs.
In fact, Johnny's not ready for this baby plot device either. When Carmen said that she's [the baby's] so lucky to have him as a dad, he had the same reaction.
This was just a few hours after Miguel had called Robby "messed up" because of Johnny's behavior. Carmen and Miguel are aware of Johnny's flaws, yet never encourage him to get better.
It's also important to mention that Devon is already set up as the "daughter" that Johnny will choose over his own.
I came across this post, and it reminded me of Robby’s story with Johnny and these two moments:
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"I want... I wanna be a father to you. I really do. I try to protect you. I try to be there for you. I just suck at it. I really suck at it. But I want to so bad... I love you too Robby." --- Johnny in s4e8 Like Robby had said in s5e4, some of his and Johnny's issues are too big to solve.
People say the family is all "bad writing", but the family is actually realistically written. The whole point is that the family itself is "bad". It's dysfunctional and unhealthy. Johnny hasn't grown, and he won't as long as he stays in his codependent relationships with the Diazs and doesn't actually get the help and healing he needs.
Like I said in that other post:
The writers have made this Johnny-Robby-Diaz situation an "either/or" situation this whole time, and this situation is meant to cause Robby more trauma. They literally set up Johnny's decision in s1e4 as a "do over". All of Johnny and Miguel's heartfelt conversations about their own relationship are in the context of Johnny's failures with Robby, Miguel's belief in his entitlement of Johnny over Robby's, and Johnny using Miguel to feel better about his own failures with Robby. In s5, Johnny talked about the baby only in terms of Johnny's failures with Robby. Robby is treated in the writing as not a member of this "family", which given the circumstances in which he was forced into it, is telling.
I wonder what will happen between Johnny and Robby now. Like I said, I'd always believed that Johnny and Robby only would be endgame, but after part 2, I'm wondering if Johnny and Robby are meant to be endgame at all. Regardless, there is no setup that genuinely includes Robby in Johnny's "do-over" "family". Given all the setup, no ending for Johnny and Robby's relationship will be satisfying. I just hope that, by the end of the story, Robby is no longer stuck in this abusive situation.
Overall, I get people being upset about the story. I am too. But, I also see so much nuance in the story that I wonder where all this will lead.
(As always, please don't reply or reblog with dismissive comments about the nuance in the story. The nuance is part of the story, and the story is exploring important topics like trauma, bullying, neglect, and dysfunctional relationships. I'm aware of the part 3 leaks, but people also shut down conversations about all possible theories for the leaks. I’m just going to stick to analyzing canon here.)
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Live reaction of chapter 145 brought to you by yours truly on one half working neuron ✨ (some spoilers here and there from upcoming chapters so beware!)
Penelope looks so sickly, the bags under her eyes are so unsettling, no wonder Callisto lost it and tried to drag her to the palace when he took notice of her condition
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She stayed up all night overthinking and couldn’t catch a moment of sleep after confirming her suspicions that Ivonne is indeed the Laila and she wasn’t mistaken on Soleil…she is exhausted and ready to give up, free my girl she went through enough 😭
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I didn’t think it would be possible but her wrists are even thinner than last time…PENELOPE GET BEHIND ME. I’ll protect you from these stinky men eugh🤺🤺🤺
Callisto tends to be really headstrong and protective when it comes to Penelope, but despite being very over the top on different occasions he was not exaggerating with this one. He had a good reason to lose it *sobbing*
like. her wrist are shaped like scrawny twigs 😭 Penelope I love you, but please eat
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FEAR NOT CALLISTO IS HERE TO SAVE THE DAY 🗣️🦅
I really like that she actually called Callisto by name instead of his title again, this is the first time she calls him by name out loud 🥹
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And it’s always his golden hair that she notices first, she’s so real for that. Penelope probably has a hidden fantasy of running her fingers through his hair, who wouldn’t tbh
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AUGH he looks so soft here, I cannot comprehend how Penelope managed to restrain herself from yanking him down and kissing him, in her place I would’ve done that a looong time ago
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It’s this scene from chapter 161 of the novel, I can’t believe we’ve come this far, this scene is finally getting illustrated. Still feels like a fever dream 😭😭
Snippet from novel chapter 161:
Arm still covering my eyes, I called irritably, "I said to let no one in."
"Does that include a member of the imperial family?"
The voice belonged to someone I hadn't been expecting to hear. I quickly lowered my arm, the sudden light stinging my eyes. I could make out his luxurious golden hair and ruby-red eyes, even as my vision blurred, trying to adjust.
"Callisto?"
I wondered if I was dreaming as I stared blankly up at the man in front of me. His ruby eyes suddenly darted downwards until they were much closer to my face, and his golden hair was tickling my forehead.
He scrunched up his nose, "I can't have you waking up already. I haven't even kissed you yet." His laughing baritone was loud and clear thanks to our close proximity and his words jolted me to attention.
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I will print this panel and plaster it on my wall so it can be the first thing I see when I wake up. Father and mother are back to serve us the most delicious, toe-curling, gut-wrenching angst
There’s a certain appeal in knowing we’ll get Callisto in shambles in the next chapter. He will be so angry too, can’t wait for his new range of expressions, Suol is going so hard with these last few chapters, literally feeding us with masterpiece after masterpiece ✨🤭
Y’all better get your ibuprofen ready because we’re suffering from now on, and it’s only suffering, hurt no comfort type of thing. The coming of age scene where Penelope collapsed will be in about 7/8 chapters at most so we’ll be served angst continuously ✨🫶
#calliope angst#it hits so hard you have to take ibuprofen#get your therapist on speed dial#GRRRR GREENHOUSE SCENE MY BELOVED#penelope eckhart#penelope eckart#callisto regulus#penelope eckart x callisto regulus#villains are destined to die#vadd#(non-official tags):#death is the only ending for a villainess#death is the only ending for the villainess#el’s rants#el’s thoughts#chapter analysis#but it’s more of a live reaction
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WITBA for continuing a DND campaign as it was written?
I wrote my own campaign and my players and I are coming up on our last two sessions. I had the whole story written before even finding players, including a tragic death that's going to happen in the next session. Here's where it gets iffy.
One of my players, let's call her A, just had a close family member pass away in the past two weeks. We all told her to take as long as she needs before we started up again, fully expecting to be on a little hiatus. Today she texted the chat trying to get everyone's schedules to play soon.
On one hand, I'm excited to continue the finale but I have a very important character death happening in the next session. It's an npc that A personally has adopted and fallen in love with. The whole party loves this npc and have gotten into several fights to protect them. He's a big deal.
Now I'm worried that me killing off this character would be insensitive and crass considering the loss A just had, despite this having been written several months beforehand. I don't want to upset her further and make her think of it while trying to play and get away from reality.
So, WITBA for continuing the story as planned and kill off an important character?
What are these acronyms?
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I saw you asking for stuff. Could u do a ghost Tommy and ghost hunters sbi with ranboo? safe vore. Tommy is an old soldier ghost. He died protecting is group and the town don't remember his name just his story. feel free to do what u want to it
I took some tiny liberties with this, but this idea has been infecting my brain for days now so i hope you like it!!
tw: soft, safe vore, talk of suicide, character death (duh it’s ghosts)
Ranboo sat in the back of his family’s van, pressing lightly on his stomach as he felt a few marbles come back into his mouth before he swallowed them back down again, as he’d been doing for a few hours at this point. Machinery rattled in the back of the van; different cameras, scanners, and other ghost hunting stuff. Ranboo had been in this game for a few years, when he met his adoptive family Phil and Techno. They met him at his group home and realized he was something special, and something that could definitely help with their less than normal job.
Ranboo grew up lonely. They never knew their birth parents, as they were given up as a baby. So what did lonely kids do? Well, in Ranboo’s case, learn magic! That would surely make them cool! They became good with cards, regurgitation, and slight of hand, cause what else were they supposed to do with their time? They very quickly learned that the others kids didn’t find any of that cool, and they were only pushing potential friends farther away. Eventually, they set their sights on a family, but that didn’t seem to be going well either. Ranboo lost almost all hope of being adopted by the time they were a teenager. Until one day when he met Phil and Techno. Two best friends (they had to make it very clear to the adoption agency that no, they were not gay, Phil had a girlfriend, they just wanted a kid together cause fuck it why not, which in Ranboo’s opinion made perfect sense). These two were weird. Like, really weird. And Ranboo loved them immediately.
They were professional ghost hunters (which almost made the adoption agency kick them out, they had to call Phil’s girlfriend Kristin to verify that she had a stable job and was supplying Phil and Techno with enough money to properly take care of a child) and were looking for another member of their troupe. Ranboo believed in ghosts wholeheartedly, and was ecstatic when they showed genuine interest in his magic tricks (which included the marbles, to his surprise). When Ranboo turned 16 he was officially legally adopted, and it was the best birthday present he ever could have received. From that point on, the three of them were a ghost hunting team (Kristin still had a “real job” cause they needed money), and quickly learned that Ranboo was a pretty damn powerful medium. He could sense and communicate with the dead through their machines far easier than either of his dads, and had helped them find plenty of haunted locations in the past.
The place they were headed was a memorial to an old war, some place that Ranboo had a feeling was incredibly haunted. Now, museums were normally at least a little haunted, but almost never haunted enough to make him feel ill. But this memorial, whatever is was, was unwieldy upsetting to him.
“You doin’ alright back there, kid?” Techno asked from the drivers seat, and Ranboo swallowed down his marbles again to answer. “Yeah, just, uh, a bit nervous. Something feels…off about this place.” “As you’ve said,” Phil chuckled. “Whatever’s here has to be mega haunted.” He said, fiddling with his camera. Oh, right, they were youtubers too, Ranboo almost forgot that part. They had a somewhat popular channel and Ranboo was incredibly grateful that his parents were very considerate with what he wanted to put online. Right now, Phil was just trying to make sure their main handheld worked. “Yeah, something’s here. I’m sure.” Ranboo adds. This was about to be one hell of a trip.
~~~
It’s midday when they arrive at the museum of the town of L’Manberg, somewhere none of them had ever even heard of. They meet a nice man who Phil had called over the phone to do a tour with. He introduces himself as Mr. Manifold, or just Jack, and leads them around the museum. Apparently, this small town had a lot of war time history, and Jack knew loads of it, since apparently he’d had an ancestor who fought, which was pretty cool. Ranboo tried desperately to feel for anything specific attached to the man, especially if he had a great great grandfather who died in these parts, but nothing. No ghosts. Ranboo still felt wrong, but he couldn’t find why. Nowhere they went had any sort of supernatural readings, no matter how cool it all was. With every nervous glance Phil and Techno gave to Ranboo, he felt worse and worse that he could have led them somewhere useless.
Until that one room.
Apparently, the museum was built over a specific relic of the war. Jack started leading them down an old stone staircase, into a place he said was called “the final control room.” There were old half decayed wooden chests lining the walls, moss infested stone bricks, and a single wooden button in the center of it all.
As soon as Ranboo entered the room, they collapsed.
They had never had panic seize them like this in their entire life. Something in the room, something about it, was wrong. So, so wrong. Something had happened in there, something that hurt a lot of people. Something that time couldn’t let go, that had lingered in that room and hit him like a freight train over a hundred years later. He couldn’t breathe, he couldn’t see through his own tears, and could only barely feel Techno lift him and run him back out of the room.
“Something bad happened in there.” Ranboo muttered as soon as he was able to. Phil and Techno looked to Jack, who explained that that was the very room where the infamous L’Manburg traitor tried to kill the original founders. He apologized for taking Ranboo in, but they insisted they were fine to continue the tour. So, Jack did. Eventually when he finished (with no more incidents, thank god), Phil thanked him profusely for his expertise, and Jack wished them all well and invited them to explore on their own a bit to stop and read.
“Im so sorry, i swear to god I felt something, i still do, there has to be something here, there has to-“ Ranboo started apologizing as soon as Jack was out of hearing range, only for Techno to cut him off. “It’s ok, Ranboo, it’s ok. Maybe you’re just off your game, it happens to everyone, we’re not mad at you. You figured out what was wrong with that room, maybe that was all it was. And hey, we get to look around this cool museum!” Ranboo looked and saw the genuine excitement in Techno and Phil’s eyes and chuckled, ignoring the feeling that the control room was definitely not what he was looking for, no matter how upsetting it was. His parents were both huge history buffs, and he bet that they loved being here and just learning more than even finding actual ghosts.
“Ok, yeah, I- I’m just gonna go sit outside, if that’s alright. I feel like i’m suffocating in here. You guys keep exploring and call me later, we’ll meet back up then.” “If that’s what you want to do, mate. Keep in touch.” Phil tussled Ranboo’s hair, and him and Techno left to put their paranormal equipment back in the car, leaving Ranboo to find their way outside through a back door. He stepped out and closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. He felt better…for all of two seconds.
Then he opened his eyes and panic hit him again.
The outside area to the museum was a historical town, a place that held some of the exact homes that L’manberg citizens lived in over a century ago, and with those homes was a horrible sight that almost made Ranboo pass out from sheer panic for the second time that day.
A tower. Massive and made of cobblestone, it grew to lengths almost higher than Ranboo could physically see. It was old, moss covered, and slightly crumbling, as old stone is, but still sturdy. The control room was nothing compared to this thing.
Ranboo managed to keep himself from throwing up as he made his way closer to the tower and read its plaque: “Tower of the Child Soldier.” Ranboo pulled some of the marbles up to his mouth and started chewing on the glass, a nervous tic that Kristin warned would break his teeth one day, but for now her warning was the farthest thing from his mind. He read on.
“This tower was built by an original citizen of L’manberg who couldn’t take the war efforts, ending their own life by jumping off this very tower. Letters and documents from other soldiers around this time indicate the victim of this tragedy was a child. This stone is a testimony to the cruelty of war, and just how many innocent people were lost not just to the battle, but to the wars they were fighting with themselves. Rest in peace, Child Soldier, your memory has lasted far beyond your years. To learn more, visit the memorial of the Forgotten Soldiers.”
Ranboo didn’t know when they started crying. This was horrible, so so horrible. But, for the first time, they felt like they found part of what they were here for. He rushed back in the museum and found Jack shockingly quickly, asking about the memorial to the forgotten soldiers. Jack explained that while the stories of many remembered veterans’ stories were told in the museum itself, there was another memorial to the soldiers whose names and faces had been erased over time.
The memorial Jack led them too was, admittedly, beautiful. It was outdoors, marble archways and columns aligned in a circle with display cases with belongings. Some of the things were all together and labeled that it’s likely they all belonged to the same person, though historians were unsure who those people were. Some display cases just held random objects. Finally, there was a small room with a door and a staircase. Jack said that it led to the room where the rest of the memorabilia that belonged to the child soldier was. So, Ranboo thanked him and went down.
The hallway at the bottom was narrow, the walls were glass cases lit up and filled with remnants from this poor kid. Diary entries, songs and poems, hand knitted scarves and jackets, and mementos that were presumably gifts from their friends. There were even letters from people who knew them, ranging from talking about how irritating they were as the youngest soldier at just 16, some talking about how they’d never met someone so loyal and it was a shame they were fighting in such a huge war so young.
Ranboo had never felt quite like this in his entire life. He honestly couldn’t help the tears that rolled down his cheeks. He felt utterly sick to his stomach, pain stabbing him through the gut at the sheer grief he felt. The feelings weren’t his, something was pushing this onto him. This was what he set out to find; this poor child, only a little bit younger than he was now, losing his life to suicide in this war. “I’m not sure if it’s you that’s here,” Ranboo started quietly, “but…but I’m here to talk to you. To learn your story. I’m a medium, I just want answers.” Nothing. Ranboo continued. “I’ve never had a place make me feel like this. I knew something happened here the moment I heard of this town, and I needed to see. I learned about the war, I learned about the rebellion and the betrayal and-“ at that, a draft blew through the room, dropping the temperature drastically. Ranboo was sure he closed the door behind him, and even if he hadn’t, it wasn’t this cold outside.
“I know, I know that must have been horrible, I can’t imagine, I went in that room and just the sight of the stone and chests sent me into a panic attack. I can’t imagine what it would have been like in person.” It felt like a rock was sinking in his gut the more he talked about the control room, so Ranboo shifted gears. “I’m so sorry. I’m about as old as you were, I can’t imagine. You didn’t deserve it, you didn’t deserve any of it. And you don’t deserve to be stuck here alone. This place may have forgotten you, but I don’t want to. I’m here. I want to be here, if you’ll let me be.” Ranboo could barely finish speaking before he fell to the ground, his forehead pressed into his knees as he began to sob. He knew these feelings weren’t his, he knew it, but he also couldn’t reason through the blind grief and sorrow he was feeling enough to care.
With no warning, the lights in the display cases at the walls went out, leaving a single illuminated case right in front of him, the center of it all: a uniform. White and blue with accents of red. Tattered, torn, with small patches and embroidery on it. And at the foot of the case, a little ghost stood. Barely 5 inches tall, standing just on the other side of the glass. Ranboo was…well shocked, to say the least. He’s been able to feel ghosts, sure, but he’s never seen one. Half of him didn’t think they could even have a visible form until right now.
The child soldier was a boy, somewhat translucent and shaded blue, with dirt filled hair, sunken almost glowing blues eyes, and a torn up mismatched outfit of whatever he must have been wearing when he died. He stared up at Ranboo, who he’d let stop sobbing, tense and full of distrust. But as Ranboo looked at him, he found himself tearing up again all on his own. “You look…exhausted.” The little ghosts eyes went wide, shoulders dropping as he began to cry again. Ranboo laid a hand in front of the glass, and was shocked when the ghost stepped through onto it. They pulled him up to their chest, feeling the cold and only half corporeal being press into them and cry as Ranboo swiped a finger up and down his back.
“It’s been so long,” the ghost muttered eventually. “Even when I was alive, I…” He trailed off, and Ranboo didn’t push him to continue. “It’s ok.” Ranboo said, cause what else were they supposed to say? It was a ghost. A real, actual fucking ghost, it was taking all of their self control to not freak out. All things considered, it looked weak, but if this kid was what was infecting the museum and the memorial and messing with their head like that, Ranboo could guess that he was anything but. “I’m here to help, however i can.” “How?” the ghost whispered in response. “I’m dead. Thats it. I didn’t do well enough in life, now I’m here forever. Even if you can finally see me, you can’t stay.”
“Can I take you out of here? You don’t deserve to spend the rest of your afterlife surrounded by the same places you were for your entire life. I travel a lot, I’ll take you.” Ranboo wasn’t sure why he was offering. He certainly didn’t need to, he just met this dead kid. But…something about all of this hit home for them. They lived their life seemingly alone, unappreciated, and helpless. Getting a family had been Ranboo’s saving grace, maybe they could be a saving grace for this ghost too.
“I…I’d love to go. But I can’t.” the ghost admittedly sadly. “Im stuck here. Im bonded to this stupid uniform and there’s nothing else in here that I’ve had a stronger connection with. There’s only one thing I might be able to re-bond to, but it’s not down here.” “Wherever it is, I’ll find it.”
“I had it throughout the whole war, and it was on me when I..when I died. I’d bet it’s there. If you find it, I’ll be able to follow wherever it goes. That’s how I think it works, or at least, that’s how it feels like it should work. You’re the first person who’s ever been able to see me like this, I want to trust you. If you really can somehow feel my emotions, you’ll find it. Help me and I’ll leave with you.” “I’ll find it, then. I’m not leaving you behind.” He didn’t know why he became so attached to the ghost, but he wasn’t going back on his word now. Ranboo pulled the ghost away from his chest, holding him to eye level with one hand and holding the other outstretched. “I’m Ranboo.” The ghost grinned, his smile taking up his whole face as tears still poured from his eyes. He took one finger with his hands and shook. “I’m Tommy.”
~~~
The sun was starting to set by the time Ranboo gathered everything they needed for what they were about to do. Whatever weird physic connection they had to Tommy was truly fucking with their head as they circled the tower, trying to get a sense of where this thing might be. Almost everyone in town was home for the night, which Ranboo was grateful for since he was pretty sure that digging up around a memorial site was probably unappreciated at best and illegal at worst.
He was running fully off his own intuition, digging near the front of the stone, quickly realizing that whatever Tommy needed was in that area. It luckily wasn’t too far down, since Ranboo was only using their hands, but eventually they found it: a compass. This was it. Almost as soon as their hands touched the old iron, the sick panicked feeling they’d had since first arriving here went away, though Tommy’s lingering grief remained. They pulled a water bottle from their backpack and quickly cleaned off the compass with their shirt till it shone like it hadn’t been buried for a century. They opened it’s clasp to find the inside miraculously untouched and clean of grime, save for a message that had been scratched into the inside years ago: “Your Tubbo.” Along with this, it was fully functional, pointing in a direction that was decidedly not North but hey at least the hand was working. They clenched it in one hand and pushed the upturned soil back into place with the other. They had to push back more tears as they thought that this had been Tommy’s, now unsure if the sadness was theirs or not, but that was an issue for later. Right now they just needed to steal this century old historical artifact and be on their wa-
“Ranboo! There you are, Phil and Techno have been lookin’ for you!”
Now call it a practiced reflex or whatever, but when a kid who has spent most of their free time practicing magic tricks that may or may not involve swallowing marbles gets caught by a museum curator holding what could be a priceless addition to the museum that they are not going to give up, you can imagine that in the panic to hide it, muscle memory may kick in.
Ergo, you know exactly where the compass ended up the second Ranboo heard Jack’s voice.
Ranboo turned away from the monolith to see Jack running towards him, trying to keep his cool and pretend everything was fine as he felt the cold metal of the compass slip down his throat and into his stomach, eventually clinking against the marbles he hadn’t had time to pull to his mouth. “You alright, man?” he questioned, and Ranboo nodded. “Yup! yup, totally, absolutely nothing wrong here, heh…where are my parents? I have something to show them.”
~~~
“This is crazy, we didn’t even know this was here!” Phil said, standing at the cobblestone tower. “It’s sad, too. You said there was more stuff left behind by this kid?” Techno asked, and Ranboo nodded, wanting to get back to the other memorial as soon as possible so they could get Tommy and get out of this town. “Yes, there’s a little underground tomb thing in his memory, and we need to go there before it closes and we head home.” Ranboo said with a determination that was rare for them. Techno and Phil took the hint to follow.
Making his way back to the memorial, Phil and Techno looked around a bit at some other artifacts, but Ranboo bolted straight back to where Tommy was. Racing down the steps, he saw all the lights were still broken except for the uniform spotlight, and Tommy was nowhere to be seen. “Tommy, it’s me, I’m back. I found it, I found the compass. ‘Your Tubbo,’ right? You can come with me, I’ll get you out of here.” Nothing. He waited. He heard the district footsteps of his parents behind him, but paid them no mind. “Tommy? It’s ok, you don’t have to hide! It’s me, Ranboo, your friend, remember? Tommy??” He started to get frantic, and felt a calming hand on his shoulder. “Calm down, Ran, you don’t need to have another panic attack today. Who’s Tommy?” “The soldier, this soldier!” Ranboo said, pointing at the uniform. “The kid, the one who built the tower! He asked me to find something, it was where he said it would be, I spoke to him, I touched him, he was here!! Please, please you have to believe me-“ “We do, mate, we do!” Phil interjected, taking Ranboo’s hands in his and rubbing circles into the backs of his palms. “You spoke to a ghost, that’s incredible! But, maybe if you found what he wanted, he’s moved on? You helped him find peace.” “He didn’t want peace, he just wanted a friend! I told him I’d be back for him.” Ranboo practically sobbed. He again didn’t know what came over him, he was never like this. He barely knew this ghost, why was he getting so worked up over this?? Phil and Techno exchanged glances that told him they were thinking the same thing he was.
“Ranboo, listen to me;” Techno said, placing his hands on his kid’s shoulders, “you helped him. He’s at peace now because of you. He probably didn’t know that would happen, but he’s ok now. He’s happy, alright?” Ranboo took a few deep breaths, and suddenly felt a shocking wave of calmness wash over him. And by shocking, he meant freezing. It was like a bucket of ice water had been poured over his head, but he no longer felt ill. Sure, he was shivering, but he felt…better. So, so much better. He was worried about Tommy, but maybe his parents were right, maybe he had moved on. Maybe Ranboo had helped him.
No one noticed that the air in the cellar grew warmer as the trio left the up the stairs.
~~~
Ranboo’s sense of calm had persisted as he was helping pack up his family’s van, now knowing they’d have to drive through the night to get home, but so did the chill. In fact, his shivering had gotten so bad that Phil had stopped to buy him a blanket and a few packs of hand warmers at a gas station, and that was barely doing anything. It had been a few hours at this point, and while Techno was driving in silence and Phil was asleep, Ranboo found himself laying across the backseat pulling the marbles back up to his mouth again out of habit, only to barely suppress a hiss of pain when they hit his teeth. They were fucking cold, and the sensation on his teeth was incredibly unpleasant. Pulling the marbles out of his mouth, he was shocked to discover that they were coated in ice, fully frozen over.
None of this was making sense. They set the marbles aside, sitting up somewhat and pressing a hand to their torso underneath the blanket. It was frigid, the entire area of his stomach was ice cold. Was…was it the compass? Could it be?? He tried to pull it up, but for the first time in years, he couldn’t. He tried again. Nothing. He tried a third time, and this time distinctly felt something yanking the compass back into his stomach.
The aura of calm (which Ranboo was quickly realizing was being pushed onto him like the panic had been earlier) was cracking, and Ranboo began to panic. He couldn’t throw up, his body temperature had dropped by at least 10° F, and his stomach felt like it had frostbite. What could he possibly have done, what could possibly-
wait.
The air in his stomach was dropping in temperature, his emotions were being manipulated, and the compass was in his stomach, the one thing that the ghost had said he’d be able to latch onto to leave with Ranboo.
no fucking way.
“Tommy…?” Ranboo whispered as loud as he would dare as to not disturb his parents. He waited for a response, until-
“I was wondering how long it’d take you.”
Ranboo could have screamed. The calm aura shattered, and he slapped a hand over his mouth to keep from hyperventilating while his other hand stayed firmly grasped over his stomach. Fuck. Holy fuck, there was a ghost inside of him. Was he possessed, or was this being haunted? It felt like he was being haunted, more so, but either way he would certainly fucking rather not be. “What are you doing in there?! Get out!!!” Ranboo hissed frantically, still trying to pull the compass out of his stomach and hopefully the ghost along with it. The compass was pulled back down regardless.
“Hey, don’t yell at me like this is my fault! Why would you swallow my compass anyway? Don’t you think it was a bit of a shock for me to see you walk into my room, feel the presence of the most valuable item I owned before I died, and attach myself to it only to end up in here?! Pretty damn weird way to rescue a guy, if I do say so myself.” Tommy snarked, and Ranboo sighed. “I’ll explain later, I don’t want my dads to hear me. I’m sorry, now let me bring you out.” “No can do.” Tommy replied. “I don’t, uh, deal with adults well. I heard them talking to you, that’s why I didn’t just leave the second I ended up in here. I’d rather not meet your folks. And myself and the compass seem to be just fine.”
“I’m gonna die.” “No you won’t, pussy. I’m not that cold.” “The metal against my stomach lining is!” Ranboo quietly argued, “just let me bring the compass up, i’m not gonna get rid of it. I want to help you, but i can’t do that if we’re both ghosts.”
“You…you still want to help me?” “‘Course.” Tommy responded in silence for a few seconds, before sighing. “Fine, but if you toss it I’ll curse you.” Ranboo hummed in agreement, not bothering to argue that if he wanted to toss it he wouldn’t have dug it up and certainly wouldn’t have swallowed it in the fucking first place, and this time when he pulled up the compass it came easily. When he pulled it out of his mouth, a cloud of steam came out with it like he was standing outside in negative degrees. Sure enough, the compass was frozen and almost hurt his hands to touch, so he immediately opened a new pack of hot hands for it, wrapping it carefully.
With nothing else in his stomach, he could start to focus on what Tommy himself felt like, which he’d expected to be nothing, but was…definitely something. Firstly, the ghost was cold, as was to be expected, but oddly physical. Like, there was a noticeable weight in his stomach, but he was generally used to that. Tommy didn’t necessarily weigh…less or more than the marbles, but he weighed differently. His weight was spread out, and since he wasn’t as solid as what Ranboo normally swallowed, it felt strange. He could feel something, someone, in there, but it wasn’t like anything he’d felt before. He…didn’t hate it. Tommy was almost…soft? Like a form made of tv static that he could feel along the bottom of his stomach, but he still had a form and some mass. Tommy hadn’t said anything since he gave up the compass, so Ranboo took the opportunity to press his unoccupied hand against his stomach, feeling where the front walls touched Tommy’s form and the tv static feeling spread. Then he felt Tommy press back, seemingly done with talking for the night. Ranboo patted where he felt his stowaway and laid an arm over his…well, he guessed friend now.
Something warm lit up in him when he realized he’d finally have a friend, even one his own age (Tommy still acted like a teenager, so in his mind, it counted). He genuinely couldn’t wait to get to know Tommy better, learn about ghosts and how he lived, and more, but he quickly figured out that excitement was not the only thing making him feel warmer. Tommy, who seemed to be completely unconscious, was warming up slowly, and Ranboo was confused for all of 2 seconds before looking back at the compass. Right, the hot hands. He guessed Tommy was more linked to this thing than previously thought. Ranboo looked down at his torso, arm still over his friend. Yeah, Tommy deserved to be warm after all his time in that cold ass cellar. He reached down and placed the compass, still in hot hands, right in front of the car heaters that Techno had been blasting for the entire ride. He felt his stomach heat up a lot faster, and swore he heard Tommy sigh as he felt the tension in the ghost’s frame melt away. Good, if this is where Tommy needed to relax, Ranboo could do that.
#sorry if this seems unpolished lol it’s edited but i haven’t written for a request in years#also Ranboo uses he/they#also also if at any point this says ‘watch’ ignore it i meant compass in the oh version of this i forgot what a compass was called#*og not oh#might make another part to this#please send asks if you wanna know more!!#cyncerity#mcyt g/t#mcyt gt#tw vore#giant!ranboo#tiny!tommy#ghost!tommy#giant!phil#giant!techno#g/t vore#vore writing#soft vore#safe vore#dsmp g/t#dsmp vore
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What did you think of Magik #1?
Happy Birthday, Illyana? 🎉
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Magik is plagued by a nightmare of the Darkchild urging her to submit to the demonic corruption within her soul.
Magik ♥️ 🍰
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Illyana’s fondness for cake, and her troubles obtaining it as a member of the X-Men, continue.
Bigots and Funerals and Demons, Oh My! 😱
Magik slaughters The Crow Demon’s demonic minions during a funeral for a young girl named Moni being picketed by anti-mutant protestors. I always love when Illyana cuts loose on the supernatural with her Soulsword, and writer Ashley Allen allows Magik to obliterate demons in this much like she did with vampires in the Blood Hunt one-shot she wrote back in 2024.
The Crow Demon 🐦⬛
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This guy is a total asshole. Designed by artist Peach Momoko, The Crow Demon wants to shatter five seals imprisoning his master Liminal beneath Alaska, allowing the entity to unleash an apocalypse. Writer Ashley Allen drew inspiration for Magik’s solo series from some of her favorite manga series, which include Soul Eater, Full Metal Alchemist, and Demon Slayer. It should be fun reading Illyana’s intercontinental quest to thwart Liminal’s demonic minions.
Magik Uses Actual MAGIC! ✨
Magik cauterizes a wound to her arm, casts a spell to render the Crow Demon mute, and erects a mystic barrier to contain the spread of Liminal’s influence from the first broken seal. One of the biggest problems fans have had with Illyana’s characterization in recent years is when she’s depicted as nothing more than a sword-wielding mode of transport, when in fact she’s one of the most powerful sorceresses in the Marvel universe. The writer clearly heard the fans, and depicts her using *GASP!* witchcraft. Magik also once again emerges the reigning champion of the censored profanity speech bubble in the X-Men universe. Prove me wrong.
Illyana ♥️ Children
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Poor Cal Isaacs. Belonging to a family of mystics dedicated to preventing Liminal’s escape for generations, the boy’s grandmother was training him to become the next keeper of the journal containing magic necessary to stop the entity before the Crow Demon kills her. Now, Cal finds himself alone, and demands that Illyana allow him to accompany her. Magik, feeling responsible for the boy’s predicament, agrees. I’ve always enjoyed a storyline trope where a strong female protagonist embarks on a dangerous mission with a child she’s entrusted to care for. One of Magik’s biggest weaknesses is children. Allen is fully aware of Rasputina’s love of them, and incorporates that here. But be careful, Cal. As much as Magik adores children, they have a horrible tendency of vanishing from her life as though they never existed.
Darkchild Unleashed?
The Isaac Family journal foretells the coming of Darkchild, a tidbit of information that Cal keeps from Magik. I’ve always wondered if there was a cult in the Marvel universe that worshipped Darkchild, or an organization founded to prevent her from destroying creation. Allen seems to be addressing that with the Isaacs. Who they truly are and what they know has yet to be revealed, but I’ve always enjoyed a good mystery.
Final Verdict: ⭐️⭐️ Out Of Five Stars
I like that the series is focusing on the darker side of Illyana’s lore with a supernatural horror vibe. One of the things I enjoy most about the character is her struggle to remain a hero despite the evil inside of her, and I feel like that subplot has been sanitized for the general reader’s protection, as of late. I’m eager to see more of Magik combatting this villainous manifestation. I love German Perálta’s artwork in this, and kudos to Allen for using the original spelling of Darkchild first introduced in The New Mutants #13 back in 1984. I see what you did there. 👍 Magik could turn out to be great, or it could be mediocre. It’s too soon to tell, but I like what I’ve seen so far. It takes time for any good series to find its groove. Is it phenomenal? No. Is it horrible? Also no. Good luck to the title’s entire creative team on making their labor of love a resounding success. Illyana is in capable hands, and I look forward to her future adventures.
#Magik#Illyana Rasputin#Illyana Rasputina#X-Men#From The Ashes#Marvel#Marvel Comics#Comic Books#Comics#Ashley Allen#German Perálta
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