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starlightandsouls · 6 months ago

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Yours To Have, Yours to Break

Summary: What if instead of Nesta, Cassian found out about Azriel and his secret lover. What will happen when the hearty general, in his anger of being left out, causes his brother's happiness to fall apart? How will he atone for his mistake?

A/N: Of course I had to make my comeback with the angstiest angst to ever angst. And that too by turning my fluffiest fic into pure pain. I guess you can say that this this is a spin off of Yours to Keep and Cherish. Also... I know I dropped off the face of the earth but life happens guys. I'm sorta back and here's a fic to make up for it.

Disclaimer: If you're an Elain fan, I would recommend you not read this. I would hate to ruin your day. I do not hate Elain. This is just an idea I got from all the soap dramas I've been seeing recently. Don't kill me please.

Also this shit and not edited. But I was so desperate to post something that I honestly don't care. Hope y'all like it. And yes there will be a part 2

Cassian POV:

As the General of the Night Court’s armies, Cassian had many duties: training soldiers, commandeering battalions at the borders, coming up with war strategies, buying romance novels for his mate and her friends. He wasn’t sure when the last one made its way on his list of responsibilities, or who put it there, but there it was. And who was Cassian to deny his mate?

So that’s how the Lord of Bloodshed found himself standing aimlessly in the middle of the Rainbow, scratching his head, with a list in his hand. Nesta had sent him off to find the newest edition of a Sellyn Drake novel but he hadn’t the slightest idea where to find it. His mate had instructed him to visit a particular bookshop named “The Quill”, being sure that they would have the newest book. Unfortunately, because luck had named him its nemesis at birth, the bookshop was closed for the day. He had asked around and apparently the owner had just left an hour prior to his arrival. Of course, they had.

That is why he had been wandering around the Rainbow, walking into one bookshop after the other, but somehow not one of them had the book Nes wanted. What are the odds of that? How is it possible that only one bookshop in the entire city had this specific book? And why did it have to be closed today? Cassian knew returning empty handed would not only incur the wrath of his beloved mate, but also her Valkyrie sisters. And given the fact that he himself had been teaching them some new disarming techniques, he had no desire to become their training dummy.

While he did not intend on stopping his hunt, he was quite parched. As the summer season approached, afternoons in Velaris became increasingly sweltering. A chilled glass of wine would do just the trick to cool him down, and also relax his nerves. Just as he was deciding on which bar to stop at, he remembered a conversation he had had with Mor the other day. She had told him about a café she had discovered that served the best margaritas during lunch time. Honestly, she hadn’t stopped raving about it for almost a week. What the hell. He was already out in town, might as well try a new place. If it turned out to be good, he could bring Nesta to placate her in case he couldn’t find her book.

Mind made up, he took off to the air, the subtle breeze as he did so, instantly making him feel better. Gliding through the clouds, the twists and turns with wind, were always a guaranteed way of cooling down.

Said café was perched on a hill overlooking the Sidra. He took in the view and the lush gardens outside the café as he landed, and started to walk in. The interior was just as beautiful as the exterior; the décor a blend of elegance and coziness. Oh yeah, he was definitely bringing Nesta here for a date.

He had just given his order to a waitress who looked way too giddy writing it down. Thank the Mother Nesta wasn’t here. Or someone might as well have lost a hand.

Although this is one of the reasons why he didn’t like coming to restaurants and bars alone. Not having company meant he didn’t have anyone to share his stories and jokes with. So, as he waited for his order to arrive, he sat back and took in the people around him; a habit that looked casual enough but was one instilled in him during his years training in the Illyrian camps.

He had been admiring the view from the balcony in the corner when his order arrived. Smiling a thank you, he took a sip from his margarita and damn was it good as Mor had said. He made a silent note to himself to thank her for the recommendation. He was in the middle of another deliciously cold sip, when something caught his eye in the corner of the room, causing him to choke.

What. The. Fuck.

Cassian was sure he looked like a blubbering fish with how his jaw dropped open and his eyes bulged out their sockets. He had to be dreaming or hallucinating from the heat. Yes, that must have been it, the heat had surely gotten to his head. For Cassian could think of no other explanation for the sight in front of him.

His brother, the Shadowsinger of the Night Court, torture extraordinaire, was sitting hand in hand with a beautiful young woman, smiling like a love-sick fool and… eating macarons? Since when did Azriel like deserts? Or the more pressing question: who the hell was he sitting with? Cassian knew his brother liked to keep his lovers secret, but deep down his gut told him this was no mere fling, or one-night stand. For starters, Azriel was smiling like a puppy drunk on love, while bringing the lady’s hand up to his lips to kiss. Cauldron. Just as Cassian had somewhat stopped gawking like a fish out of water, he saw the lady lean over and whisper something across the table, causing Azriel to throw his head back and let out a hearty laugh.

Although he couldn’t explain why, but at that moment Cassian felt a sharp hurt go through him. For he could not remember the last time Azriel had laughed like that with them. Damn it, he couldn’t even remember the last time he had seen Azriel smile nearly as much as was doing now at any family function.

Before he could even begin to process what had unfolded before him, he saw Azriel pay the bill for their food and the couple walked out hand in hand. Immediately Cassian was on his feet, ready to follow them. If someone had asked him why he did what he did at a later moment, he would not have been able to explain himself. At that moment, Cassian was driven only by curiosity and a minor note of hurt too-why had his brother hid this from them?

Rushing out after paying the bill, Cassian saw the happy couple walk down the cobblestone path, once again arm in arm, with the woman leaning against Azriel. Another thing that shocked Cassian: how the hell had Azriel not noticed him by now? Those pesky little shadows normally informed his brother of every detail of his surroundings; Azriel’s own heightened senses and observational skills were what made him the Spymaster of this court. So, for him to not notice Cassian so obviously trailing behind them at a distance, was a testament to how captivated his brother was by the woman on his arm.

At one-point Cassian thought that his brother would winnow with his partner and he would lose them, but the couple continued their stroll without a care in the world. He continued to trail behind them while also maintaining somewhat of a distance. Azriel may not be as hyper vigilant as always, but he wasn’t blind by any means- and Cassian was no small man either.

“Breakfast was delightful, darling. We should plan another afternoon here, what do you think?” he heard the woman comment.

“Of course, but I am oh so very tired. I think I need a few days alone at home with my nightingale to recharge,” Azriel replied with a smirk.

Cassian balked on the inside: okay Mr. I Don’t Need To Resort To Poetry.

“We could always have breakfast here again on Saturday. It is our two-year anniversary, and I intend on spending the day however my nightingale wishes. I think the café can be a brilliant start to our day,” Azriel offered, laughing as the woman swatted his arm at the previous comment.

Reaching the end of the path, Azriel grabbed the woman in his arms and winnowed away, leaving behind a thoroughly perplexed Cassian.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Cassian was convinced he must have stood there for another half an hour before coming to his senses. He then took off to the House of Wind, ready to face his mate and the Valkyries’ collective wrath. And his assumption had been right; the three women had blown up when they saw him return empty handed and had proceeded to go on twenty-minute-long rant. For the life of him, Cassian could not have repeated a single word they had said. Because he had not listened to a single word, at least not while paying attention. As their rage had quelled, Cassian had simple gotten up and walked to his room, ignoring the questioning looks from his mate.

While Nesta was still in the library with the girls, Cassian had retreated to bed. And that is where he was now: sitting in bed, staring at a wall, completely at a loss for words. He could not even begin to process what he had seen, let alone understand what he was feeling. For some reason he could not get over how openly Azriel had laughed with that woman, how alight his eyes had seemed. It was as if the Shadowsinger was glowing with happiness, as paradoxical as that sounds.

And it’s not like Cassian wasn’t happy for his brother-quite the contrary. He was just hurt that Azriel had chosen to hide something like this from him for two years. Two years. The words clanged around his head like the sharp tolling of a bell. Azriel had this from them for two goddamn years. And he had a sinking feeling that if he had not discovered the two of them today, he would not have found out for quite some more time.

But why? Keeping casual flings a secret was no big deal. They all had had ventures they didn’t tell anyone, he was sure of it. But if the couple were celebrating their two-year anniversary, then it must be serious. Cassian could tell his brother was committed just by how he had been looking at the woman. And if Azriel truly was serious about this woman, why would he hide it from them? His family?

That is the part that pierced his heart. Up until this day, Cassian had thought the two of them to be rather close. Sure, Rhys and Az clashed from time to time because of their own attitudes, but he liked to think that Azriel and him had always been close. Azriel was his best friend for Cauldron sake. Whenever he had had issues with Nesta at the beginning of their relationship-and he had plenty- Azriel had been his confidante, the one he went to for advice. His brother had been there for him at the highs and lows of his journey with Nesta.

So why hadn’t he let Cassian do that for him? Why had his brother chosen secrecy when he could have confided in Cassian? It’s not like he wouldn’t have supported them. He knew his brother was secretive and shy, but it was one thing to hide things about his work and another to choose to hide such a major part of his life from his brothers.

They were brothers, they were supposed to support each other, to stand by one another, not keep secrets and tell lies. All of a sudden Cassian saw the past two years in a different light. He recalled all the times Azriel had shown up to breakfast with an unusually cheery mood, all the times he had been rushing to leave family dinner, all the times he had skipped their get togethers with the strangest excuses. How long had this been going on? And for how long had they been so painfully oblivious?

Did Azriel not trust them? No, that can’t be it. Did Azriel think he could not open up to them? Each explanation he came up with seemed less plausible than the last. As he continued to spiral, Cassian began to question whether the two were as close as he thought them to be.

Why. Why. Why.

“You know if you stare at the wall any longer, you’re going to burn a hole into it.”

Nesta. He hadn’t even noticed when she had come into the room, and judging by her amused look, Cassian assumed she had been there for some time. Pushing off the wall she had been leaning against, Nesta walked over and sat by him on their bed.

“I’ve been calling your name for the past five minutes, where’s your mind at?” Nesta asked while pushing some stray strands of hair behind his ear.

Shit. What was he supposed to do? He couldn’t just tell Nesta something he himself wasn’t supposed to know. If he hadn’t walked into that café by chance, Cassian would have been none the wiser about this whole situation. For whatever reason Azriel was keeping his relationship secret, he didn’t think it his place to reveal it.

“It’s nothing, Nes. Just thinking about Wind Haven. I’m supposed to head up there next week and I already know Devlon’s going to be a pain in the ass,” Cassian tried to divert.

“Since when have you started getting so worked up over Devlon? He’s going to whine and throw a fit, but ultimately he is going to have to do what you say. You’re worried about something else. What is it?” his ingenious mate inquired. How her intuition was so good he’d never know, honestly sometimes he thought of handing over the mantle of General to her, with how good she was.

“C’mon. You know you can tell me whatever is bothering you,” Nesta pushed while grabbing his hand in her own and damn did he melt at that.

“Alright. If I tell you, you cannot tell anyone else.”

Nesta sat up straighter at that, ears perked with curiosity, eyes wide open and eager.

“I won’t tell anyone,” Nesta answered while nodding.

“I’m serious about this Nes. You can’t tell anyone, not even Emerie or Gwyn. No one,” Cassian reiterated, trying to get his mate to understand how serious it was.

“Alright, alright. I won’t tell anyone, I swear.”

Cassian sighed before revealing what was very much not his secret to reveal,

“Azriel has a girlfriend.”

“Wait-what?”

“Az has a girlfriend,” Cassian repeated.

“No, I heard you the first time. But…how…when??? Why hasn’t he told anyone?”

“I have no idea, Nes,” Cassian replied while falling back against the headboard. He once again took to staring at the wall; confusion and hurt running rampant through him again, echoing the same question again and again.

Why had Azriel kept this a secret from them? From him?

“When did he tell you?” his mate inquired.

“He didn’t,” Cassian chuckled, “I stopped at that new café by the Sidra to get some drinks to cool down while I was out for your books. I saw them together there.”

A beat of silence passed between them before Nesta barged on with her questions,

“You seem…upset about all this?”

“I am. Not at the fact that he has a girlfriend, Cauldron no. It’s about time the idiot found someone. It’s just…why didn’t he tell us? Why keep it a secret?”

“Maybe…it’s new? You know Az. Maybe he just wants some time to figure things out himself before he tells you all,” Nesta reasoned.

Cassian let out a bitter laugh before spitting out,

“It is very much not new. The two were planning their two year anniversary at the same restaurant this weekend. Two goddamn years, Nes. He’s been lying to us for that long.”

He wrenched his hand from hers at that. Cassian knew he was being unfair and unreasonable, but he was angry. Maybe he had no right to be but one does not think clearly when in the clutches of fury.

As his previous confusion and hurt settled, they left behind only anger in their wake. That is what he felt right now. Anger. At Azriel, for lying to them all this time, for hiding something so significant. Did he not consider them brothers?

Before he could succumb to the ravages of anger, his darling mate was there to pull him back, as she always did.

“I can feel all that you know. Don’t let your anger override what you know to be true. This relationship of Azriel…it has nothing to do with us. We’re not entitled to anything regarding it just because we’re his family.”

“Oh so what I’m just supposed to ignore the fact that he’s been lying to us about his whereabouts and plans for the past two years, when he could have just told us?”

“No I am asking you to trust Azriel. You know your brother, Cass, probably more than anyone else. You know that he has a reason for everything he does and you know that he would never do anything to hurt his family intentionally. If nothing else, trust in that.”

Cassian sighed a defeated sigh. His mate was right, as she always was. For whatever reason Azriel had decided to keep this relationship a secret, Cassian would have to trust in it. And when the time came, he hoped his brother would feel comfortable revealing the truth himself.

……………………………………..................................................

Little did Cassian know, that despite the fact that he had made Nesta swear not to tell Azriel’s secret, he had unintentionally revealed it to a third. For outside their bedroom clutching books she had meant to return, stood Elain. Elain, who had almost torn the books with how hard she was clutching them. Elain, who’s hands quivered with rage.

This is why Azriel had been ignoring her. All these months she had been trying to get his attention and he had always slipped away. Because of this?? Some common girlfriend?

No matter. Elain would get him back. How could he ignore her for some commoner? Who deserved his love more than her?

As she walked away, already planning her schemes, a wicked thought went through her mind, a precaution in case she couldn’t convince Azriel:

If I can’t have him, no one can.

...............................................................................................

Azriel POV:

The past few days had been the happiest he had ever been. Although Azriel wasn’t quite sure how fair that judgement was. Each hour he spent with his nightingale, he deemed his happiest. And it has been two years of such blissful happiness. Two years together at each other’s side that they were celebrating today.

He had already arrived at the same café they had breakfast a few days ago and was now anxiously awaiting his beloved girlfriend. Honestly, he would have preferred that the two arrive together, not wanting to spend a minute away from his nightingale. But alas, not everything had to be as he wished. As soon as she had woken up, his nightingale had slipped out from his arms (something he had still not forgiven) and had rushed to her book shop. According to her, she had some urgent delivery that she just had to be there for. Therefore she had promised him that she would meet him directly at the café.

That left him, sitting in their favorite spot in the café, with his head swiveling to the door every time it opened, hoping his nightingale had arrived. It wasn’t like she was late, it’s just that he too early, wanting what he hoped would be a great start to a celebration filled day.

“Oh, Azriel!”

He heard his name be called, but his heart instantly dropped, that voice did not belong to his nightingale. Turning around he saw…

“Elain? What are you doing here?”

“What a coincidence, Az! I was just out for some errands and thought I would get myself a drink. I’m absolutely parched! Thank the Cauldron for this lovely café!” Elain replied in an unusually high pitched voice.

“Yes, how lovely…” he trailed off, gaze flicking to the door. He knew his girlfriend would be arriving soon and he would much rather Elain not be here for that… for a plethora of reasons.

“Well, what are the chances of meeting you here Az? And look, you’re alone too! Why don’t we have lunch together, it feels like we haven’t caught up in forever.”

“Actually I’m meeting some…”

He never got to finish his sentence. If someone asked him later what happened, Azriel wasn’t sure he would be able to explain it. One second Elain was smiling at him, trying to grab his hand, the next her gaze turned cold, flicking to something behind him. The next thing he knew, within a matter of seconds, Elain had grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and smashed her lips to his.

What. The. Fuck.

Azriel didn’t even process what had happened, didn’t even realize that she was kissing him. Elain. Was. Kissing. Him.

The last thought jolted him out of his state of shock and he pushed her away. Not caring for who saw or heard, he yelled,

“What the fuck Elain? You can’t just grab people like that! What the hell is wrong with you?”

“Oh c’mon Az. It was barely a peck. I had barely begun to enjoy it,” Elain replied with a callous smirk.

All of a sudden he did not recognize her; he didn’t recognize the cruelty in her eyes, the indifference in her expression. Where was the kind hearted woman he considered a friend? And who was standing in front of him in her place? When he didn’t say anything, still riddled with shock, Elain continued,

“Well no matter. It may have been short but it achieved it’s purpose,” Elain replied slyly. She inched closer and grazed her hand up his arm and whispered, “if you want to continue, I would gladly indulge you, Azriel.”

He didn’t know what the fuck was wrong with her, why she was doing this, in a crowded café no less. But Azriel was way too uncomfortable to try to find out. He wrenched his arm away from her and was about to give her a piece of his mind when he saw it again: Elain’s gaze flickering to something behind him with a wicked smirk on her face. One of victory.

Hoping against hope it wasn’t what he feared it was, Azriel turned around. And it was like time itself had stopped. For there, at the entrance of the café, with tears streaming down her face, stood his girlfriend, his nightingale. A millennia could pass and Azriel would not forget the raw pain, the betrayal shining in her eyes amidst the tears.

No. No. No. No. No. This is not happening. This cannot be happening.

He took one step toward her, to explain, to make her understand he had no fault in what she had seen. But before he could, his nightingale turned around and left the café.

Not knowing what to do, Azriel followed after her to see her almost running away from him.

“Love! Please! Listen to me, its not what it looks like,” Azriel begged, anguish lacing every word.

“Oh please Azriel. Do you know how typical you sound right now?” He did, Cauldron he did. But she had to understand…

“Darling I would never hurt you like that. I don’t even know why she was there… or how… but you have to understand… she kissed me! I pulled away… I would never do that to you,” Azriel let out. He knew his fragmented thoughts probably didn’t make much sense. But panic and fear were making it difficult to come up with something cohesive.

“Really, Azriel? You don’t know what she was doing there?! For Cauldron sake, Azriel! I know you called her there. You know, if you wanted to break up with me, you should have done it yourself like a man. You didn’t have to use her for it!” his nightingale spat at him.

What? Break up with her? Break up with the one blessing the Mother had bestowed upon him? What the hell was she talking about?

“Love… I don’t…”

“You don’t what? Huh? Have any need for me anymore? Well you don’t have to worry about me getting in the way, please go enjoy your life with your darling Elain?” His girlfriend yelled, throwing out Elain’s name like it was poison.

Vaguely he sensed Elain coming up behind them. How did she catch up with them? His love spat out a wry laugh, before saying,

“Look, she’s here to get you Azriel. Go be with your love.”

Before he could refute it, Elain jumped in,

“Its okay, Azriel. I told her everything. She’s not in the way anymore. We can be together now!”

“Elain, have you lost your mind? What the hell are you doing? Why are you doing this? You-”

“Cut the act Azriel. Go. Enjoy your life.”

And with that his nightingale walked away for good, taking the shattered pieces of his heart and soul with her.

… … … … … … … … … … … …

Azriel stood in that spot like a blubbering fish for Cauldron knows how long. He was smarter than this. He was quicker than this. He knew that. But for some reason his mind felt addled, like it was submerged in some murky fog. He couldn’t think straight for some reason.

What the fuck had just happened? Did it truly happen? No, it had to be a nightmare. It had to be. He didn’t just lose the love of his life. He didn’t. He wouldn’t be able to bear it.

Azriel had almost convinced himself of his own delusion, when Elain’s rustling snapped him out of his daze. The woman had the gall to walk away after everything she just did. Not so fast. He grabbed her by the arm and yelled in her face, propriety and etiquette long forgotten,

“WHAT THE FUCK ELAIN? WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST DO?”

She wrenched her arm back and held her head up high when responding, as if she just had just committed some honorable deed,

“I did what I had to. You were never there Azriel. I always tried to talk to you… but you were never there. And to find out that it’s because of her! Some commoner! I couldn’t bear it. But she’s not here anymore, Azriel, we can be together!”

“What?! Are you hearing yourself Elain? I don't love you! Not like that, I never have-”

“BUT I LOVE YOU! WHY ISN’TTHAT ENOUGH!” Elain screamed back.

“You’re out of your mind. You… how did you even find out?”

“Cassian told me,” Elain replied calmly, her demeanor immediately changing. There was something seriously wrong with her.

But her words were what caused his world to stop spinning.

“What?”

“Cassian told me. He saw the two of you together the other day and told me that I would find you here today as well.”

His mind was reeling. Cassian knew too? How? He had been so careful with everything? How had it slipped past him so easily?

Elain patted his shoulder one last time before saying,

“We’re meant to be together, Azriel. I love you so much that I’ll ignore this commoner you were sullying yourself with. She might have left you. But I’m always here for you with open arms.”

And then Elain left, simply and quietly. As if she had not sentenced Azriel to a life without the one happiness he had salvaged for himself in this cruel world.

..........................................................................................

Cassian POV:

Cassian had been sharpening his blades in the training arena, waiting for the Valkyries to arrive, when he felt the wards shift. Someone had winnowed in. Before he could question who it was, he saw Azriel standing at the entrance.

Despite Nesta’s words, his immediate reaction at seeing his brother was one of annoyance. He doubted Azriel was here to confess so the continuing secrecy bothered him even now.

Any rant or anger that Cassian was planning on letting out, disappeared as he neared his brother. Azriel had tears streaming freely down his face, shoulders shaking from the sobs.

“How could you?”

Was all his brother let out. Cassian was at a complete loss for words. His brave stoic brother was falling apart before him and Cassian knew neither cause nor cure. His lion hearted brother who had bared five centuries of pain and trials and had never let out even a wince. And now… It seemed like something was tearing Azriel apart into shreds.

“Az, what’s wrong? I-

“How could you?” Azriel repeated, his sobs getting more and more violent. And each falling tear fell like acid on Cassian’s heart. All previous annoyance was replaced by an overwhelming urge to soothe and comfort.

“How could you? What did I ever do to you?” Azriel cried out again.

“Az… brother… I have no idea…”

“Oh don’t act stupid. Don’t act like you don’t know about my girlfriend!”

Oh. That is what this was about? Azriel knew that he knew? But why was he so upset about it? Cassian didn’t think him finding out warranted such a reaction-

“You knew and you send Elain there to ruin everything!”

What? Elain? What did she have anything to do with this?

“You ruined everything! My nightingale… she’s gone… she won’t even talk to me… She won’t look at me… And it’s all your fault!” Azriel let out in between hiccups of tears.

Cassian knew he had to intervene before Azriel spiraled into a full panic attack.

“Brother, calm down. Alright, yes I saw the two of you at the café, but I only told Nesta, I swear on it. I have no idea what you’re talking about, or what Elain has to do with anything.”

Azriel moved further away from him. The utter betrayal shining in his eyes made Cassian want to bury himself in the darkest corner of the world. He did not know what his fault was but he was ready to spend eternity atoning for it if it meant Azriel would no longer be in the pain he was so clearly in.

“DO NOT LIE TO ME!” Azriel roared, leaving Cassian stunned, “ You did this! You couldn’t bear it, could you? You couldn’t stand the fact that I was happy so you sent Elain to ruin everything. You always do this, you always have to take everything away from me!”

Before Cassian could ask for an explanation or beg for forgiveness for a crime he did not know, Azriel had winnowed away.

Alone, his mind was working on overdrive. What did Elain have to do with anything? Cassian was no fool. He had long been aware of the youngest Archeron sister’s affections for his brother. But he also knew his brother had never reciprocated those affections, had always seen Elain as nothing more than a friend.

How did she know about Azriel’s relationship? Nesta could not have told her. Despite how close the two sisters were, his mate had sworn to him and he knew Nesta enough to know that she did not go back on an oath. Had Elain somehow overheard them? And if she had, what could she possibly have done to cause Azriel so much pain?

So many questions were whirring through his head, not one of them had a coherent answer. But amidst the chaos, a singular thought rang the loudest, and it was one that pierced Cassian’s heart:

What have I done?

#azriel×reader #azriel x oc #azriel acotar #azriel fanfic #azriel x reader #azriel headcanons #azriel x y/n #azriel #acotar headcanon #acotar fic #acotar x you #acotar x reader

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child0feden · 5 months ago

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TALK TO ME

lando norris x voice actress! reader

♡ general dating headcanons for lando with a voice actress partner!

୨୧ the game release dates are almost all wrong but just… shhh! you guys have been dating since mid 2022 <3

♡ related smau available here and related hc available here | view my formula 1 masterlist here

reading music recommendations: death stranding by chvrches - devil trigger by casey edwards

♡ sticking with the meeting story from lovely voice, i’ll expand on it a little!

୨୧ lando was streaming resident evil village one afternoon, wanting a switch up from his usual games and he’d heard good things about this one so why not play it?

♡ little did he know how much a video game would absolutely change his life <3

୨୧ within and hour he reaches castle dimitrescu

♡ he’s immediately in awe of one character, but it’s not who you’d probably think…

୨୧ instead of simping for lady dimitrescu, like most people do, he was down bad for bela dimitrescu who just so happened to be voiced by you!

♡ he was VERY vocal about how much he was in love with this character but especially her voice… almost demanding his chat to give him the name of her voice actress…

“ guys, who voices this character here? god, she’s got such a lovely voice hasn’t she? can’t just be me who thinks that… ” ( it definitely wasn’t just him, he converted almost his entire chat info bela dimitrescu worshipers )

୨୧ not long after he begged from the voice actresses name, multiple people in his chat post your social media handle and as soon as he sees it filling up the chat, he pauses the game to take a peek

“ bloody hell! that’s her? well the face certainly matches the voice, hm? she’s beautiful ” ( this clip of him goes absolutely insane on twitter )

♡ when you guys officially begin dating, lando goes on a binge, playing almost all of the games you’ve voiced a character in!

୨୧ one of the most infamous being until dawn, which he played on stream…

♡ he had no idea how easy it is to lose a character in that game and you didn’t tell him, wanting to see how far he could get before killing someone off

୨୧ it didn’t take long at all and the first character to die was yours :( you got your jaw pried open and head crushed by a wendigo

“ oh bloody hell, love! i’m sorry, oh fuck, that’s horrible, is it over? i’m so sorry, oh my god… ” ( you could be heard laughing so loud in your shared bedroom before coming in to offer him some comfort )

♡ safe to say lando was fucking traumatised… to see your face and hear your brutal screaming, it was way too much for him and he felt horrible! it was enough to make him restart the game

୨୧ on his second playthrough, he just wants to keep your character safe, all the others can get lost, he doesn’t care but his baby? she’s making it OUT!

♡ and your character does make it out! she was the only one left alive but lando is fine with that, as long as you’re alive

୨୧ whenever you’re on a comic-con panel, you’ll get a question about lando every once and a while

♡ like most voice actors and actresses, you the the motion capture for a lot of your characters too!

୨୧ this has led to a lot of footage of you and lando behind the scenes of games making into “ the making of ” documentaries!

♡ a fan favourite being the documentary for the last of us part II! it had quite a few clips of lando coming onto set and constantly making you laugh during scenes, making crude gestures towards you and calling you “ dotface ”

୨୧ he got kicked off set many times… but that wasn’t enough, oh no! naughty dog wanted revenge for how many times they had to reshoot a scene…

♡ so they got their revenge in the form of lying to lando! they told him they wanted to give him a simple, innocent cameo in the jackson section of the game! he’d be an innocent npc

୨୧ lando was so excited! he agreed right away, letting them take the 360 scans of his face and body, he couldn’t wait to see himself when he played it on stream!

♡ when he did play it on stream, he was incredibly confused as to where he was in jackson, he couldn’t find himself… but he figured maybe he just missed it! all the while you’re sitting in the next room, watching his stream with a downright evil smile on your face

୨୧ he comes across his face and body a little later in the game and oh boy, he was SO upset!

♡ his character wasn’t some innocent npc… oh no… his character was a wlf member that ellie, your character, has to brutally kill to proceed with the story

“ that’s me! for fuck sake! love, did you know about this?! ” ( of course you knew, but you were too busy laughing at how upset he was to answer his question )

୨୧ safe to say he never trusted a developer ever again…

♡ lando is a HUGE shipper for a lot of your character’s relationships!

୨୧ seyloy? he’d scream it from the rooftops, he was rooting for them to just kiss already for the entire burning shores dlc and he yelled SO loud when they finally did <3

“ finally! you know i was getting really worried they wouldn’t make it official… thank god ” ( again, you can just be heard laughing in the background before yelling out “ seyloy for life ” which he repeats back to you whilst chuckling )

♡ one of your favourite characters you’ve ever had the pleasure of voicing is clementine in telltale’s the walking dead!

୨୧ it was the first character you EVER voiced at the age of 8 and you really grew up alongside your character, always coming back to voice her in the following seasons as she grew up

♡ the final season at age 16 was especially special to you because it reveals clementine to be bisexual, just like you… and it’s how you came out to your fans too

୨୧ you and lando have said if you ever have a child, you’ll give them the middle name “ clementine ” because of how much the character means to you <3

♡ of course, children aren’t something you two plan to have very soon so you adopt a dog and end up naming her clementine ( you love calling her sweet pea too )

୨୧ you and lando treat her like a princess and take her everywhere with you guys! one time, you bought her a little replica of clementine’s hat and lando thought it was so damn cute, he made you wear yours and got a picture of you two together before sending it to EVERYONE he knows

♡ whenever you get new roles, he’s so excited for you!

୨୧ he loves letting you practice lines with him at home, though he can never stay serious for long and starts cracking jokes within ten minutes

♡ but he really is just so supportive! when your new game trailer releases, he’s sharing it on ALL of his social medias, flexing about how he has such a talented partner who has played all of these amazing characters and don’t even get me started about when he’s in the paddock… he talks about you to EVERYONE who’s willing to listen

“ well, she has a new game coming out soon so she’s pretty excited to see fan reactions to her character in that and then she has some panels to do as well ” ( it won’t be long before he’s pulling up pictures of some of your characters to show them too )

୨୧ and whenever he’s in the city, if he sees a billboard or any other type of promotion for your upcoming game, he always takes a photo before sending it to you! if you character is on the promotion, he’s asking if you know “ who that beautiful lady is ”

♡ if any of your characters get figurines, he buys them ALL!

୨୧ he has a shelf for them in his streaming room, next to the shelf with his racing stuff on it… two things he loves so much right next to each other

♡ since oscar is also a pretty big gamer and plays some games that you have a character in, it’s pretty common for him to send lando pictures of character at unflattering angles, jokingly asking him “ is this your girl? ”

୨୧ to which lando promptly responds “ yes, yes it is, and what? ”

♡ when you were nominated for a best voice actress award for your role as aloy in horizon forbidden west at the game awards in 2024, lando was ecstatic for you!

୨୧ you’d already won two previous awards, one for your role as clementine in telltale’s the walking dead and another for your role as ellie in the last of us part II in 2023, so if you won again, this would be the second award you’d received whilst dating lando

♡ he dresses up SO good for the awards, just as you do of course, and as soon as you arrive at the event and your pictures are posted to social media… oh it was a frenzy

୨୧ most people were going nuts over how good you both looked whilst some people said nothing would ever top him wearing the custom made cult of the lamb suit at the 2023 game awards

♡ the award show is going great, you and lando loving to see all of the other incredibly talented people receive their awards and chatting to people around you but eventually, it’s time for the winner of best voice actress to be revealed…

୨୧ lando holds your slightly sweaty hand in his, squeezing it as they read out your name as one of the nominees

♡ when your name is read out as the winner, lando lets out the loudest yell right in your ear before helping you stand up and giving you a tight hug

“ YES! oh i knew it love, i knew you’d win! go on, go get your award, i love you ” ( he gives you a quick peck before you walk off too, no doubt being screen recorded by fans watching at home )

୨୧ while you’re on stage accepting your award and giving your speech ( making sure to thank lando at least twice for his constant love and support ) he’s filming you and taking pictures of you on his phone, as if there aren’t multiple professional photographers doing that for him, he looks like a proud mother holding his phone up and very quietly cheering you on from his seat

♡ you guys go out for dinner with some of your co stars after the award show ends, lando constantly telling you how proud of you he is

“ i’m so proud of you, you know that? you deserve it so much, you really do, love ” ( he has so much love in his eyes whilst saying it, it’s nearly enough to make you cry )

୨୧ you spend the rest of the night enjoying a delicious dinner, your dream boyfriend by your side and close friends chatting amongst each other

♡ what a night it was…

landonorris: everyone say congratulations yn! my girl just won her THIRD best voice actress award! i’m so beyond proud of you love, my greatest achievement in life is being able to love someone as talented and beautiful as you

ynln ✔️: oh, lando 🥹

> ynln ✔️: thank you so much, i love you more than you know

> landonorris ✔️: love you so much more

> ynln ✔️: do you ALWAYS have to turn stuff into a competition? 😩

> landonorris ✔️: absolutely ❤️

landoynforever: congratulations yn! three awards is insane…

> loveyouyn: right? no one is doing it like her 😭

oscarpiastri ✔️: congratulations yn! speech could’ve used some work but i’d say it was decent

> ynln ✔️: i’ll pretend that last last little bit isn’t there, thank you oscar!

#lando norris x reader #f1 x reader #f1 fanfic #f1 imagine #f1 headcanons #f1 smau #dating headcanons

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aziraphales-library · 9 days ago

Note

hiii omg first of id like to say that yall are absolutely amazing and i love ur recommendations

secondly if its not too much trouble id like to ask for holiday fics because i definitely want to get into the holiday fic spirit rn :)

I'm bumping this up because, once again, the holiday requests are coming in too late. As stated in the pinned masterpost, it take us months to answer and queue asks, folks! We do have a #christmas tag. Here are more to add to the collection...

Secret Santa by AppleSeeds (T)

On the advice of his therapist, Crowley signs up to be a 'Secret Santa', an anonymous gift-giver for a community initiative aiming to bring some Christmas joy into the lives of people going through a hard time. He's partnered with Aziraphale, a librarian who has lost his home and bookshop in a fire. Through the power of Christmas Magic, Crowley ends up meeting Aziraphale in person when he takes his nephew to the library and is immediately smitten. He becomes determined to use his expertise and influence to give Aziraphale the only Christmas present that could really make a difference, but are some things too important to be kept secret?

it's lovely weather for a sleigh ride together with you by thealienmeme (T)

crowley is a journalist at the top of his game. he asks hard questions and never lets a story slip through his tight grip, but he's also never taken a vacation. with encouragement from his boss, he books a cabin on the outskirts of the small town of Tadfield to rent out for the month of december so he can finally relax and maybe work on his book. he doesn't have any family anyways and he isn't really a fan of christmas or the holidays... then a snow storm hits. stranded in Tadfield proper, he meets a fussy bookshop owner and learns that maybe christmas just needed a little more love.

Ships in the Night by tishae (G)

Aziraphale did not want to head home for Christmas. Spending the entirety of the holidays with his Mother and siblings seemed, if you asked him, like a special version of Hell carved out just for him. Making up a boyfriend that he was spending the season with seemed like a perfect excuse (and no, he wasn't going to think too hard about why he had provided Crowley's name), until his Mother had insisted they should both come. "It'd be great to meet him!" Aziraphale had no idea how he was going to explain this to the coffee shop owner he'd had a crush on for the last two years, much less convince him to take part, but he was about to find out. or It's Christmas time, and our ineffable idiots are faking a relationship while definitely not being totally, completely head over heels for each other.

Meet Me Under the Mistletoe by IneffableToreshi (E)

Earlier this year, popular romance novelist Anthony J. Crowley met the love of his life when his agent booked one "A.Z. Fell & Co." for his most recent book signing. Aziraphale is a huge fan of Crowley's books, and they become fast friends. Unfortunately, Crowley let's his nerves convince him that it wouldn't be right to initially pursue a fan romantically, and by the time he feels it's alright, they've become so close that he's terrified of the possibility of failure. But now it's nearly Christmas - a time for miracles, right? - and Crowley has a plan to, hopefully, make Aziraphale fall in love with him the way he's been dreaming of.

The Anon Before Christmas by foolishlovers (E)

When Crowley’s friend, blogging buddy and business partner Anathema announces her annual Secret Santa Exchange on Tumblr, she is very adamant Crowley should join this year. The old-fashioned (but admittedly compassionate) man he gets assigned to send anonymous messages to every day until Christmas sounds awfully similar to the fussy bookseller that his friends adore, yet Crowley tries to avoid at all costs. But surely his friends would have mentioned if Aziraphale had taken an interest in the Bad Omens fandom as well… right? Or: An Enemies to Lovers Secret Santa Tumblr AU.

Any Foolish Thing by Caedmon (E)

Crowley is an overworked divorce attorney on the brink of burnout in London. He's irascible and mean to everyone, on the verge of verbally abusive, until his law partner, Fergus, gives him an ultimatum: He can rusticate in the small town of Tadfield for a month and come back rested in the new year, or he can be fired. His choice. Grumbling, Crowley takes off to Tadfield, eager to get it over with - and to skirt Fergus' rules. But all of that changes when he has a chance encounter with the gorgeous man who runs Mr. Fell's Books and Bonbons...

- Mod D

#good omens #ineffable husbands #human au #christmas #mod d

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lestappenforever · 9 months ago

Note

With the Lestappen-overtaking-Maxiel situation going on: Could you maybe make a little recommendation list of your favourite Lestappen fics (can be yours and/or other people's)?

Hi anon!

I absolutely can, what a fitting celebration!

As I'm still working on a proper fic rec list as I keep reading more and more fics, below you will find a small selection of my all-time favorite fics - both to read and to write!

Full list of my all-time favorite fics that I have read and written below the cut!

My all-time favorite fics that I have read:

Monaco Malaise (part 1 of Temptation's Trajectory) by @cupidskissx Rated E | 8,037 words | Complete

Using the reflection in the mirror above the vanity, he steals occasional glances into the bedroom as he wets the cloth and cleans himself off. Charles is still on his forearms and knees, face buried in his pillow, he doesn’t look like he’s going to be moving any time soon.

Max and Charles have been hooking up for a few months, casually, no string attached — definitely no feelings involved… The disaster that was Monaco 2021 sees them in Charles’ apartment, with Max having to deal with the fact that Charles can’t get out of his head.

Azerbaijan Abnegation (part 2 of Temptation's Trajectory) by @cupidskissx Rated E | 16,972 words | Complete

Charles stares at him intently, “Last time was an anomaly.” Not for the first time, Max recalls the awkward swell of humiliation after Charles had told him to stop. The hairs on the back of his neck prickle at the memory of everything that followed, “Yeah, that better not happen again.”

After Monaco, Max thought he’d made up his mind about Charles, and their little arrangement. They’re in Azerbaijan and Charles is everywhere: in his head, in his messages, in his hotel room… Will Max be able to hold onto his resolve, or will his attempts at self-denial only prolong the inevitable?

Mona's comment: I have read these two fics more times than I can count, and I'm going to keep reading them again and again and again until the day I die. Loz is such an amazingly talented author, and her writing has honestly altered my brain chemistry numerous times.

you and me, just us (and your teammate sergio) by @oscar-fastri Rated T | 3,377 words | Complete

Checo was fully aware of what he’s walking into. Still, he seriously doubts that anyone could have been prepared for the full force of Max Verstappen and Charles Leclerc being heads over heels in love with each other and not even trying to hide it.

Or: 5 times Checo thirdwheels Max and Charles + 1 time it's everyone else's turn

Mona's comment: This is the "You, me and your friend Steve" song in perfect fic format, and let me tell you the sound I made when Avery published it was not human.

The Nights Are Long (But It's Easier Together) by @f1writingbyme Rated E | 43,759 | Complete

“Oh, God, what is it?” Max groans. “It’s Mr. Corvetto, right? I knew it. I’m telling you, never move into an apartment next to elderly people. It’s just– Why does she call me? What the hell can I do? Doesn’t she need to call an ambulance or something? Or, I don’t know, her family, or–” “Max.” Charles interrupts Max’s ranting. He ends the phone call, cutting off Mrs. Corvetto’s panicked yelling with a simple press of his thumb. He stares at the blue-eyed man in front of him. “Your apartment is on fire.”

Or: The fire in his apartment is only the beginning of a long list of misfortunes that await Max. Fortunately, he has Charles by his side to help him through it. That is until Charles is the one that gets targeted.

Mona's comment: I don't even have words for this, it just needs to be read. WARNING: Prepare for heavy angst.

And That's How I Foksmashed Dad's Championship Trophy by @il-predestinato Rated T | 6,500 | Complete

All of that would have been forgivable if not for the Green-Eyed Monster’s complete disregard for the pre-contracted occupation rights of Max’s lap. Such rights had long been pre-determined and belonged to Sassy (and occasionally to Jimmy, she admitted begrudgingly). However, no amount of quiet hisses and vicious glares seemed to penetrate the creature’s thick skull, and he would greedily occupy Max’s thigh for more than 95% of any given afternoon. Sometimes with his head, sometimes with his feet, and a few times he even straddled his entire body over Max; the latter could not have been comfortable for Max, as the Green-Eyed Monster was enormously overweight compared to Sassy. (Jimmy had insisted that it was not nice to shame another living creature about their weight, but she was not wrong. With her compact size and considerably more reasonable mass, Sassy was confident that she was much more comfortable for Max to have on his lap than that horrendously oversized creature.)

Mona's comment: I have never read anything as great as this, and I don't think I'll ever read anything as great as this ever again. I want to move into Elle's brain and live there forever.

set my midnight sorrow free (part 1 of this is our place, we make the rules) by @il-predestinato Rated T | 13,439 words | Complete

He doesn’t blame Max, not really. If he could have Charles for one night, he would never let him go either. Maybe he isn’t the one who is losing; Max is also playing a losing game. You can’t open yourself to Charles and try to exist in his charmed life without becoming irrevocably enamoured. When Max let Charles walk into his motorhome, when he let Charles slip into his existence, Max didn’t know it then but the battle was already lost.

we don't know how to rhyme, but damn, we try (part 2 of this is our place, we make the rules) by @il-predestinato Rated M | 4,862 | Complete

He pulls back reluctantly and misses the warm mouth almost immediately. Stars, he was doomed. “I want this too,” he tells Charles. “I don’t believe you.” He can be so infuriating sometimes, so contrarian. Some day, he might actually make Max lose his mind.

even the sun sets in paradise (part 3 of this is our place, we make the rules) by @il-predestinato Rated T | 27,774 words | Complete

If he had to name the place where the story of Max and Charles began, if there was a moment that divided them into Before and After, there would be a few candidates. But there was only one correct answer. He would never forget the name. The place is called Val d’Argenton. Stories are still being written there. Charles likes to tell the story of the incident - turn by turn, infused with poetic drama, detailing every single emotion: frustration, anger, pure spite. Every time he tells it, his smile grows along with the laughter in his eyes, even as his words recount a tale of opposing emotions. “I never want to go back to Val d’Argenton,” Charles once confessed. “We’ll never go back there,” he promised, and Charles knew what he meant.

Mona's comment: This series is such a rollercoaster of emotion, and I don't think I'm still fully recovered from reading it the first time. Elle is a true genius in every way.

p19 by @sennaverstappen Rated E | 5,619 words | Complete

“Charles,” it comes out soft, worried, upset. Charles will light himself on fire. He hears Max take a few steps towards him, feels two warm, winning, arms wrap around his fast-breathing chest. He’s still wearing those golden shoes. Max snuggle into his neck. “I’m here for you.” And Max had won, and he’s winning the season, and he’s P19, and losing this season. And Max is winning, and he’s not even talking about it – choosing to comfort his Charles instead. Every little thought converges into a single, red-hot one. He’s going to fuck the pole sitter so hard he’ll be sore tomorrow. “Max,” he whimpers, trying to find his voice, find his grip, find his footing in this world. Max tightens his grip around his waist. “Yes, angel?” And he can feel Max frown against his nape, soft breath against his earlobe. It turns his body white-hot. “Get on the fucking bed.”

Mona's comment: This one is just *chef's kiss*. Mindblowing. Incredible. Just like its author.

My all-time favorite fics that I've written:

Devil's Roll The Dice (Angels Roll Their Eyes) (part 1 of Devils Roll The Dice (Angels Roll Their Eyes) Rated E | 55,362 words | Complete

It all started with a crash. Well, technically, it started with a blue-eyed boy with blonde hair getting screamed at in a language he couldn’t understand when he was only 12 years old. He remembered looking at the boy, who couldn’t be much older than himself - (two weeks older, to be exact, he’d learn later) - and watching the spark disappear right out of those icy blue eyes. That was the first memory Charles Leclerc had of Max Verstappen: Watching Jos Verstappen, Max’s own father, scream at this 12 year old child with an intensity that turned his face red and made every blood vessel in his neck look dangerously close to bursting. But if anyone ever were to ask Charles when he started to realize that his feelings towards that same Max Verstappen he had known since childhood had begun to change into something else, something bigger, something terrifying he couldn’t - or wouldn’t - quite put his finger on, he would say that it all started with a crash. Because of fucking course it did.

OR: The slow-burn story of Lestappen that has brought me back from the dead, which starts with Max's crash at Silverstone in 2021.

Like Snow At The Beach (Weird But Fucking Beautiful) (part 2 of Devils Roll The Dice (Angels Roll Their Eyes) Rated E | 17,064 words | Completed

The wedding of Charles Leclerc and Max Verstappen was always going to be a grand affair. Not necessarily because it had been either man’s dream to make a big deal out of getting married, but simply because they knew so many fucking people. And because Charles had mentioned once — in passing, ages ago, long before Max went down on one knee and proposed — that he had driven past a property in Italy he’d found so beautiful that he’d had to stop the car in order to have a proper look, and that upon walking through the grounds of the property, he’d found himself thinking it would have been the perfect venue for a wedding. Max had been hellbent on finding out which property that was ever since.

OR: The lavish wedding sequel to "Devils Roll The Dice (Angels Roll Their Eyes)" that you've all been (hopefully) waiting for.

Stop (You're Losing Me) (part 3 of Devils Roll The Dice (Angels Roll Their Eyes) Rated E | 6,399 words | Completed

And now, here they are, with Charles feeling like he’s the only one making any sort of effort to keep their marriage healthy and happy outside of race weekends. He never would have imagined being married to Max could end up feeling so lonely. Another two hours pass before Max comes out into the living room, where Charles is sitting on the couch with a bowl of Andrea-and-Brad approved pad thai from their favorite takeout place just down the street, rewatching Money Heist for what has to be the tenth time. Max stops at the end of the couch, frowning down at the Monégasque. “I thought we were going out for dinner?” Charles looks up at him, face expressionless. “We were.” Max points at the bowl. “But you ordered takeout?” “I did.” “Why?” “Because our reservation was two hours ago, babe, and I was hungry.”

OR: Max and Charles have been married for 3 years, and it turns out marriage isn't always beautiful. Sometimes, it's ugly and tiring and painful.

Mona's comment: This series is what got me back into writing after a 7-year long hiatus from fic writing, and I treasure this series so much because it's what got me to make a Tumblr blog again and fully embrace the F1 fandom after being into F1 for 20 years.

19 Times The Grid Saved Lestappen (And One Time They Didn't Need To) (part 1 of Lestappen + The Grid) co-written with @f1writingbyme Rated M | 16,107 words | Complete

In that exact moment, all Charles wants to do is grab a hold of the front of Max’s stupid Red Bull polo and pull him into a kiss. He’s just about to do it, too, when a pen comes flying out of fucking nowhere, hitting Max smack dab in the face. It brings them both out of their little bubble, and Charles turns to see Lando standing a good distance away from them, already in the process of yeeting another pen in their direction. Charles reaches out to catch it before it can hit Max again, putting his reflexes to good use. Next to Lando, Carlos nods his approval at the catch. “Lando, what the hell?”

OR: Keeping Charles and Max from accidentally outing themselves to the whole world is becoming a full-time job. and Lando decides to enlist the entire grid to help him out.

18 Times Lestappen Tried To Hide Their Relationship (And One Time They Failed) (part 2 of Lestappen + The Grid) co-written with @f1writingbyme

Charles is pretty sure he is going to die of a heart attack at the age of only twenty-six because of all the sneaking around and almost getting caught every time. The only positive thing they have going for them is that they haven't been caught yet. How that's possible, Charles isn't sure, but he thinks it might have something to do with the fact that their friends either aren't paying much attention or are just plain stupid. Charles secretly hopes it's the last one. But of course, luck is not on Charles’ side, as one Mr. Lando Norris, tucked away in the safety of his driver's room on the other side of the paddock, is typing away on his phone.

How (Not) To Third Wheel Lestappen co-written with @f1writingbyme Rated T | 10,344 words | Complete (for now)

Lance doesn’t know which of his emotions is more overpowering; the secondhand embarrassment he feels at how blatantly obvious they’re being, or the fact that watching Max and Charles in their own little world is actually kind of cute. He realizes it’s the secondhand embarrassment as he watches Max shamelessly grin at James and proudly explain that he was just talking to Charles. Lance has to resist the urge to roll his eyes, especially when he notices how Charles is quite literally the embodiment of the heart eyes emoji where he’s standing next to Max for his entire interview. And the beeline Charles makes for Max as soon as he hands the microphone to Lance after his P2 interview is even worse than the heart eyes. He definitely should have been paying attention to that group chat, Jesus fucking Christ.

OR: There is a WhatsApp support group chat on how to deal with being top 3 with Max and Charles. Lance hasn't been paying attention to it at all, and lives to regret it. And then others suffer at the hands of Lestappen as well.

Mona's comment: Writing fics with Ilse is one of my favorite things in the world to do, and I can't even begin to describe how much fun it is to write all our Lestappen + the grid fics.

The Wonders of Valentine's Day (Or Whatever) Rated E | 9,933 words | Complete

Max, having completely lost the ability to speak, just stares at the sight before him, eyes wide and mouth slightly open. What the actual fuck? “Hi?” Max phrases it like a question. Charles grins at him. “Hello,” he greets, and Max watches as the grin fades away as Charles’ gaze moves down Max’s body, one eyebrow lifting. It’s only then Max realizes that he never put on pants after his shower, and is standing there in his bright orange Netherlands jersey and black boxers. It takes every ounce of his willpower not to let the internal panic he’s currently experiencing show on his face.

OR: Max isn't a fan of Valentine's Day. Charles is a menace on a mission to change that. Naturally.

Mona's comment: This was just a self-indulgant fic I wrote due to my own dislike towards Valentine's Day, but let me tell you, I had a blast from start to finish while writing this.

The Seasons of Heartbreak co-written with @f1writingbyme Rated T | 14,075 words | Complete

As the ‘I can’t do this anymore’ slipped from his lips, Charles missed his exit and continued straight ahead, unable to fully see the exit sign through his tears. The tears fill his eyes as quickly now as they had done in his car that day, and Charles finds himself realizing that he hasn’t felt happiness since. Not even once.

OR: When two men are hurting from a break-up, they can only use each other to make it right again. But they have to realize that first.

OR: The seasons of heartbreak, seen through the eyes of both Max and Charles.

Mona's comment: The sheer amount of tears shed while writing this, my God.

#Asks #Anon asks #Lestappen fic recs anons #Lestappen fics #Lestappen fic recs

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itsbeeble · 1 year ago

Text

Down? Astronomically.

Summary: Sangyeon doesn't like sweets. That doesn't stop him from visiting you and your bakery every single thing and leaving with the one thing he hates.

Genre: smut, fluff, mild angst

Pairing: idol!Sangyeon x bakery owner!afab!reader

Fic Warnings: Sickeningly sweet (bah dum tsss) fluff, strangers to simps to lovers, mild mild angst, mentions of food, Sangyeon's cringey as hell actually (like he's down BAD down bad)

WC: ~6.4k (oops)

18+ MDNI, AGELESS BLOGS DNI

SMUT WARNINGS BELOW THE CUT

Smut Warnings: y/n definitely has an oral fixation, soft dom!Sangyeon, pussy drunk!Sangyeon, y/n drunk!Sangyeon (he’s down astronomically bad your honor), he’s like obsessed with everything about her, public sex (they fuckin in the bakery 💪 but it’s closed and the lights are (mostly) off lmfao), standing by big dick!Sangyeon until the day I die, hair pulling, tummy bulge bc why not, lowkey size kink hdjgfsj, uhhhh p in v sex (protected. yall better wrap that shit); i think that's it but lmk if i missed anything.

A/N: 5 months and 6.4k words later and this sangyeon rec is done. anon i'm so sorry for the wait i'm so horrible. Also thank you to pookie (Fawn) for beta reading half of this but she had to bail and I told yall 3:30 so.... yuh. Also this is the first time I've written smut since Doll so please don't be harsh on me i'm sorry if it's bad

Sangyeon doesn’t exactly know when he started coming to your bakery. He doesn’t even like sweets, so why does he keep showing up in the dead of night and leaving with several boxes filled with sweets and a piece of cake stuffed into his mouth?

You.

Gorgeous, kind, brilliant, sweet, you. Coincidence? He thinks not.

At first, he’d started going because Eric had recommended the coffee. And then he met you, stumbling out of the kitchen with a smear of pink frosting on your cheek, a dye-stained apron, and strands of hair slipping out of your tight bun and clinging to your forehead. He didn’t believe in love at first sight, but seeing you in that near-disastrous state, yelling at the poor cashier? God, maybe he should start believing.

Down bad, Sunwoo had called him a while ago when Sangyeon had dragged him along on his nightly coffee trip. Down horrendous, actually. Sangyeon had forced him to carry all four boxes of treats you’d sent home with him, ignoring how the younger member of the group had whined about how sore his arms were going to be. No, he didn’t pay any attention as he sent the boy along. All of his attention was on you, watching you wipe down the counter and talk about how busy your day had been.

In the end, he’d only left because Jacob kept calling, begging him to come back to the company to get the boys back in order.

“Well, if it isn’t my favorite regular!” You’re beaming at him when he walks in the door, your hand placed on the shoulder of Hyejin, a younger and newer employee. You shooed her away, ignoring her questioning of who this mysterious man with a hat and mask on was. When the door to the kitchen shuts and you’re sure she isn’t coming back out, you circle the counter to stand in front of Sangyeon. “I’m assuming you want your normal order?”

Sangyeon ignores the buzzing in his body when you call him your favorite.

Sangyeon quirks an eyebrow, and though his face is hidden for the most part, you can see his hat shift with the tensing of the muscles in his forehead.

“You have my order memorized?” His tone is teasing, and you feel your cheeks warm.

“Well, I mean- you just- you’re here every day, and- and I just-” you stumble over your words, a low laugh from the man in front of you causing your cheeks to go from pink to red in an instant.

“I’m kidding,” Sangyeon promises, nudging your side with his elbow while he moves to the register. “I think I would be offended if you didn’t know my order by now.” You hum, a delicate and angelic sound that has Sangyeon feeling fuzzy. He forces the feeling away, tapping his card on the screen in front of him. It lags for a moment, and you awkwardly tap the screen to get it to move faster. Sangyeon smiles, watching you repeatedly try to tuck nonexistent hairs behind your ear.

He leans forward, placing his elbows on the counter and peering up at you. You don’t meet his eyes.

“Do I make you nervous, Y/N?” You shake your head, and he clicks his tongue. “Don’t lie to me.”

“I’m not nervous,” you insist, now slapping the screen, “this stupid thing is just- it’s just slow and I feel bad about taking up your time. I know you’re really busy-”

Sangyeon cuts you off again. “I’m never too busy for you, cupcake.” You freeze, and the machine dings. Sangyeon’s eyes squeeze shut. Why the fuck would you say that? What moron says that?

“I-” you pause, drumming your fingers on the counter. “Your order will be out in a few minutes. Hyejin will bring everything to you.”

He inhales, ready to apologize, but you’re gone by the time he can form words. The swinging kitchen door is his only indicator of where you’ve gone, and he mentally kicks himself.

Across the counter, Hyejin clears her throat.

“Iced latte for…Yeonnie?” Her voice lifts at the end, almost disturbed at the name on the cup. Sangyeon walks over, hesitantly grabbing the drink. “I’ll be right out with your boxes.”

“Not necessary,” he shakes his head. “I don’t need them-”

“Too bad,” the young girl purses her lips. “Y/N won’t let me leave until they’re gone so…”

“Oh…”

“Plus, I’m pretty sure she makes so much extra because you love her baked goods.” Hyejin stares him down, and he shuffles his feet.

“Yep…that’s…that’s true,” an awkward laugh, “the one who really loves baked goods…”

Sunwoo was right. He’s down astronomically bad.

“You’re such a fucking loser, you know that right?” Hyejin scrubs a baking tin furiously, grumbling about how these stupid drops of batter are gonna be the death of her. “Running away and giggling like someone my age because he called you cupcake.” You glare at her. She continues to scrub at the pan. “Do you even know anything about him?”

“Who even asked you?” His birthday is November 4th. I remember because he knew his friends were planning a surprise party for him.

“Nobody. I’m just the unfortunate soul who has to sit here and witness your gag-worthy flirting with Mr. Tall-Dark-and-Handsome.” You throw down your rag.

“I’m not flirting with him! He’s a paying customer!”

“Mhm. A paying customer who you wanna fuck sooooo bad.” She smirks at you, and whether mocking or not you know she’s right. Would you ever admit that to her face? Absolutely not.

“You know what-” You pick up your rag and jab a finger in her direction. “If you keep this shit up I’m cutting your hours down.”

“Do that and I’m telling Yeonnie that you want him inside of you. Call it a taste tester or whatever.”

“You know what,” your face is burning up again and your grip on the rag tightens. “Get out.”

“Nope.” Hyejin sets down her sponge and smiles at you. “I’m not leaving until I’m scheduled to leave. Unless we finish early, that is. So you better make a plan to jump this guy’s bones before I help him instead.”

Your rag hits the ground, a groan rises from your throat. And yet…you can’t help the smile that pulls across your lips. You can’t help the warm feeling in your chest that blooms with every thought of this masked customer who only ever goes by Yeonnie, even if you don’t know what he looks like under that mask and hat of his.

“You called her what?” Kevin reels back, his eyes wide and his jaw dropped. Sangyeon cringes.

“Yeah…”

“Why would you say that? That’s like…textbook ‘do not call a woman this unless she’s your wife!’”

“You think I don’t know that?” Sangyeon flings himself back on the studio floor, a loud thump echoing around him. The other boys had left a few minutes ago, and, oddly enough, Kevin was the only one he trusted enough to tell this to. “God, I’m such a moron.”

“No,” Kevin coos. Sangyeon frowns, rolling his head on the ground to look at him. “You’re just a dumbass who-” Sangyeon flings his foot out reaching to kick Kevin. “Whoa, hey, let me finish!”

“You’re just gonna make fun of me!” Sangyeon whines.

Kevin purses his lips.

“For a 26-year-old man, you sure are childish.”

“Are you gonna help me fix this or not, Kevin?”

Kevin hums.

“Operation Sangyeon-does-get-bitches is a go!”

“Call it that again and I’m getting you kicked out of the group.”

“So,” Hyejin leans against the counter while you mix up the batter for a cake. “Has Yeonnie come in yet?”

You purse your lips, carefully pouring part of the dry ingredients into the stand mixer.

“He doesn’t come in until later usually.”

“You must be so disappointed.” You don’t respond.

Truthfully, it is disappointing. Sure, you know he’ll be coming in later on. You know that he’s likely going to be your last customer and for that, you’re relieved. However, the wait has you picking at the skin around your nails. Anxiety builds inside of you. Cupcake is what he had called you. Just a small amount of affection, and for that you had shut down. What if running away had sent the wrong message? What if he thought you hated him and were just being nice? “You shouldn’t stress so much,” Hyejin stops the stand mixer, taking the empty bowl of dry ingredients from your hand. “You’ll overmix the batter and then the cake will be gross.”

“A professional, are we?” A lighthearted smile passes over your lips. Hyejin shrugs.

“I’m here to learn, aren’t I? I’m not gonna get through culinary school by working at a gas station.”

“That’s true.”

“Anyway,” she huffs and grabs a tray of macarons, “just remember the plan and he’ll fall right back in love with you. Guaranteed.”

“How do you know?” You pour the cake batter into a few baking tins, ensuring that all are evenly layered.

“Have you seen how he looks at you?” She scoffs. “That man clearly couldn’t care less about the sweets you give him. He’s here for you and the coffee. Not the cakes or the cookies or the brownies. He’s here for you. No one comes in that often for some baked goods.”

Have you seen the way he looks at you? Yes. You had. Just briefly, though, when his hat had lifted enough for the light to pass over his eyes. The corners were crinkled, clearly smiling under the mask. You’d thought he looked so pretty, even if you couldn’t truly see his face.

You knew him as Yeonnie. That’s the name he had requested the first few times he came into the bakery. He didn’t give you a full name, and you joked that what he gave you sounded like something you’d name your dog. He’d laughed, and when he did it had been like the air was punched out of you. It was such a beautiful sound, and somewhere deep in your mind, you had vowed to make him laugh every time you saw him.

Then he was showing up every day, asking about what didn’t sell very much that day. Every day he would buy them all. And every day, you cracked a joke that had you hearing that gorgeous laugh of his.

Never, however, had he called you anything but your name. Maybe you cared a bit too much about what he thought of you. Maybe you cared a little bit too much about the smudges of frosting on your face, the sweat-slicked strands of hair that clung to your hair after being in the kitchen all morning and afternoon, preparing for the next day’s pastries.

Never had you hidden from a man you loved, even if he didn’t quite know it yet.

“So,” Sangyeon leans against the counter, watching you get his drink ready. “Anything exciting happen today?” His hands are shaking, but he hides it by drumming his fingers against the counter. You’d been quieter than usual, ducking your head whenever he looked at you.

Now he was worried that he made you uncomfortable.

“Not really,” you shrug, cupping your hand around the rim of the go-cup to prevent too much splashing as you add a bit more ice. “It was kinda busy, but it was bearable.”

“That’s good,” Sangyeon nods, tugging his mask further up his face. He peers around you, squinting as he searches for Hyejin through the window on the kitchen door. “Where’s Hyejin today?” You shrug.

“I sent her home early. We slowed down a lot about an hour ago and I had already gotten a lot of things done so I told her to head home.”

“So you’re here alone?” Sangyeon frowns. “That can’t be safe.”

“I mean…” you run your tongue over your lips, “I dunno. I do it all the time.”

“You shouldn’t.” Sangyeon frowns, “This is a big city, what if something happened to you?”

“You saying you’re worried about me, Yeonnie?” You lean toward him, your lips twitching up.

“Sangyeon.” He blurts his name out before he can stop it. You blink, your eyebrows knitting together.

“What?”

“My…my name.” He takes a deep breath. “It’s Sangyeon. Not Yeonnie.”

You nod, frowning.

“Why didn’t you just tell me your name in the first place?” He inhales, shaking his head.

“It isn’t that simple, cupcake.”

“Why not?” You drum your fingers on the marble countertop. “It seems pretty simple to me. I ask for the name of the order, and you say ‘Sangyeon.’ Easy peasy.”

Sangyeon can’t help but laugh. He can’t help the disbelief at how calm you are. Sure, the reveal of his actual name isn’t that big of a deal. Maybe you thought he was just uncomfortable around people. A bit socially awkward.

The smile returns to your lips.

“Can I ask something?” He nods, leaning on the counter to look you in the eye. The hat casts a shadow over his face, but you can see that little crinkle that you’d been longing to see up close since the first day you met him. “Why do you wear this…” you wave your hand at him. “This little get-up?”

He falls quiet, and for a moment you think you’ve made him uncomfortable.

“I…I’m sorry, Sangyeon. I don’t- I didn’t mean-”

“Don’t apologize.” He cuts you off, and your mouth shuts. “I just…I didn’t want your opinion of me to…to change. If you saw my face, that is.”

“If I saw your face,” you echo. “What, are you famous or something? Oooh, are you an idol?”

Boom, right on the money.

You can see the emotions in his eyes. The fear, the shock, the confusion, the nerves. You can see his hands clenching around his coffee. A pit forms in your stomach, growing larger and larger as he shuffles back. Toward the door.

Away from you.

“Sangyeon…” you speak slowly when you circle the counter. “Are you…”

“I have to go,” he spits out. “I’m s- I just…I’m sorry. I have to go. I’m just-” his breathing is shaking, and he back into the wall. Sangyeon stumbles, whipping around and shoving through the door before you can say another word.

And after all that…you couldn’t even give him the cake you’d planned on giving him for his birthday.

Sangyeon is pacing. His footsteps are quiet, muffled by the carpet beneath his feet. His hair is in disarray from hours of tugging at the strands.

Kevin is sitting on his leader’s bed, eyes drooping and his head resting on one of his hands.

“Dude,” Kevin pinches the bridge of his nose. “You do know that she probably thinks she messed up somehow, right?”

“God, I just keep making things worse.” Sangyeon groans loudly, kicking away one of the shirts lying on the floor.

“I love that I get to sit back and watch you ruin your love life before it begins.” Kevin stretches his arms above his head, his eyes squeezing shut and a yawn fighting to leave his mouth.

“Gee, thanks Kev.” Sangyeon scowls, throwing his body face-down onto the mattress. Kevin shifts to the side, patting the older man’s shoulder.

“I’m just speaking the truth. You shouldn’t have reacted like you did. What happened to being in love with her? Did you really think she would expose you for being an idol?”

A tough question. Sangyeon would like to say that the answer to that question is yes. He would love to trust you with his whole being, with every fiber in his body, but he’s been burned before. He’s been burned, and he doesn’t want it to happen again.

“I just…I got scared, I think.” Sangyeon’s hands fold under his cheek, his voice slightly muffled. “I just got so scared because I care about her so much, but what if…what if she isn’t…” his voice trails off.

“She isn’t like Nabi.” Kevin frowns. “Is that what you were worried about? That she was like Nabi?”

“I…I think so.”

Another pregnant pause between the two of them.

“Here’s what you’re going to do. And this time you are going to listen to me and you are going to follow every bit of my instructions no matter what happens. You are going to do this tomorrow. You aren’t going to let this simmer. You are going to go there tomorrow night, you’re going to apologize, you’re going to confess, and you’re gonna have amazing sex, badabing badaboom, we get our free pastries.”

“There’s no way you’re just helping me because you want free baked goods.” Sangyeon clicks his tongue, rolling onto his back. Kevin scoffs.

“Who do you think I am, Juyeon? No, I’m helping you because we need you to get laid and fucking relax.”

“Somehow that’s even worse.”

“Yeah, well you’ve been up our asses with this next comeback on the rise. Now are you gonna listen to me or are you gonna fuck up again and make us all miserable with your moping?”

Sangyeon bites his tongue, fighting back a retort. “I’ll listen.”

“What are you doing here?”

Sangyeon practically cowers under the weight of Hyejin’s gaze. Her eyes are narrowed, her lips drawn into a thin line. He’s abandoned the mask and the hat. The only thing shielding him now is the hood of his sweatshirt.

“I need to talk to Y/N.”

Hyejin snorts. “You think she wants to talk to you after what you did?”

Regret boils inside of him, and he digs the nail of his thumb into his pointer finger.

“Please, Hyejin. I just- I just need to talk to her.” He watches the college student think. Watches her consider her options.

“Wait here. I’ll go see if she wants to talk to you.”

“Thank you, Hyejin. God, thank you-”

“Don’t thank me,” she snaps. “I’m not doing this for you, so don’t thank me.”

You’re in the back, listening to the conversation just outside the door. Your hands tug at the edge of your apron, your eyebrows knitting together.

“Do you want to talk to him?” Hyejin is careful to speak only when the door has stopped swinging, her voice hushed and her hand resting on your arm. “I won’t force you to go out there, and I can stay longer if you don’t want to be alone.”

You smile, placing your hand over hers. For the shit you two give each other, she’s one of the few people you can rely on.

“It’s fine, Hyejin. You can go home.”

“You sure?”

No. “Positive.”

It’s dark in the bakery. The blinds have been drawn shut, the door locked and most of the lights turned off. Sangyeon stares at the box you place on the table in front of him. Your eyes are trained on the ground, your teeth digging into the plush flesh of your lip.

“What- what did you make tonight?” His voice cracks, and he grimaces while clearing his throat. What a great start, dumbass.

“A cake.” The statement is cold, and he gnaws on his lip. “For you.”

“For me?” He echoes, tugging it closer to his side of the table. You place your hand on top of the box, pulling it back toward you. He drops his hands back to his sides.

“Not right now. Not until you explain what the hell happened last night.”

“I’m sorry,” he blurts out. You flinch, your body curling in on itself. “Fuck, I’m so sorry, Y/N.”

“Why did you run off?” Your voice is quieter than he’d ever heard it, and he has to strain to pick up the words you’ve said. “Why…why did you leave?”

“I don’t- I swear it isn’t your fault, cupcake.” Another flinch, and he snaps his mouth shut.

“Then why did you run?” You lift your eyes, and he can see the tears waiting to fall. He can see you fighting to keep them at bay, to keep calm.

“I…” Sangyeon sighs. “It’s a long story. One that…that I didn’t really want to have to tell you. Not yet, at least. Not like this.”

“You don’t trust me, do you?” Your voice shakes, and Sangyeon shakes his head, one of his hands reaching forward to touch your own. He hesitates, his hand partway across the table before he decides against touching you. “It’s okay if you don’t. I get it. Fans are…they’re crazy these days, I know.” You try to laugh, but you break off into sniffles.

“I trust you, Y/N,” Sangyeon protests. “I really trust you. I ran off because…because I didn’t want this to end like the last time I trusted someone.” He drags a hand down his face, laughing in disbelief. “My last relationship was rough. I thought I could trust her, and she…she betrayed me. So because of that, I was scared.”

“Of what?” You press. “Letting go of the past? Loving me?”

“Yes!” He exclaims, erupting from his seat and running his hands through his hair. “Fuck, Y/N, I love you so much that it hurts. All I ever want to do is hold you, and kiss you, and- and-” he shakes his head, and you rise from your seat. “It drives me crazy because you make me so happy to see you excited to give me things that I don’t even like but I take anyway because I just love you so fucking much. And- and I’ve wanted to tell you everything for so long but I just- I couldn’t-”

His lips are soft, you think when you kiss him. They’re soft, although slightly chapped. He’s frozen in place, his hands hanging in mid-air on either side of your body. He remains like that and you pull back, afraid that you misinterpreted everything.

He doesn’t let you get very far, his arms wrapping around your midsection and yanking you back into him.

It’s so soft, the way he kisses you. Sangyeon doesn’t move too fast, cautious and hyperaware of everything around the two of you. His hands have untied the apron around your waist, tossing it somewhere amongst the tables and he’s placed you up on the counter. His hands are all over you: moving up and down your back, caressing your cheeks, squeezing at your hips, running over the tops of your thighs and through the strands of hair that he’s tugged out of the claw clip.

His tongue is in your mouth, but he’s not using any force. Sangyeon lets you take the reins, set the pace. Whatever you want, he’ll give you. He’s yours. He lets your tongue prod at his own, lets you suckle at the wet muscle to your content. Your body is shaking against his own, and a smile crosses over his lips.

Sangyeon pulls his mouth from yours, his smile widening when you whine and chase his lips. His hands are on your waist, holding you in place. “You’re shaking, cupcake.”

“Want you so bad, Yeonnie.” You reach for him again, your lips just grazing his before he pulls back.

“What do you want?” One of his hands drags along your leg, running higher, and higher, and-

“Want you to eat me out.”

Sangyeon’s eyes go wide. So maybe he’d just been teasing you, but he hadn’t expected his sweet little baker to be so bold.

Your hand pushes against his chest, and he stumbles backward a few steps. There’s a dazed look in his eyes as he watches you unbutton your blouse. The delicate fabric slides down your shoulders, and Sangyeon swears that he’s drooling over you. The shape of your breasts in the orange glow of the fairy lights, the steady rise and fall of your chest while you breathe.

“Beautiful,” he murmurs, and your cheeks grow warm. He reaches for you, but hesitates and puts his hand down again. You watch as he drops to his knees, practically crawling to you, and you can feel your panties dampening from the action. There’s a warm feeling in your gut, one you haven’t felt in a long time. His hands are quick to undo the button of your jeans, and he watches you as he tugs the zipper down. You’re leaning back on the counter, eyes struggling to stay open and on him. One of your lips is tucked between your teeth, red and puffy from you chewing on it.

Sangyeon drags your jeans and panties down in on harsh tug, and he helps you lift your legs to step out of them. Your legs are soft, he notes to himself. He leans forward, his lips touching the soft skin gently. You flinch, and he pulls away.

“Why-” your voice trembles. “Why’d you stop?”

“You flinched,” he shrugs. “I will only do what you want me to, cupcake. The second you show discomfort, I stop until you tell me to continue or to leave. I’m yours. Whatever you want is what I want. But right now, I really want to drown in this sweet pussy of yours.” He doesn’t move though, his cheek resting against the inside of your knee and his eyes are lidded with lust. “I’m not doing anything until you say so, cupcake.”

You squeeze your eyes shut, and a nod of your head has Sangyeon practically moaning as he pulls himself closer to your core.

“Fuck, cupcake, you’re dripping f’ me.” He coos, gauging your reactions as he prods at your entrance with the tips of his calloused fingers. You whine, trying to squeeze your legs shut, but his broad shoulders keep them open while he plays with your sopping pussy. His thumbs spread you open, and he watches you clench around nothing.

“Hurry up, Sangyeon,” he grins at the desperation in your voice.

“So needy,” he hums. You click your tongue and one of your hands laces in the soft strands of his hair. Your grip tightens, and he whines when you yank him closer to you.’

“Well,” you hide the way your voice shakes when you feel his breath right up against you. “I need a bit of a taste tester, you know? Need to know if she’s sweet enough- oh fuck-”

His mouth against you before you can finish your statement. His mouth is wide open, his tongue swiping along your folds, dipping inside of you and just grazing your clit, knowing full well that’s where you need him the most. Your hand is still in his hair, but your grip has gone slack. Your jaw hangs open, your head tipped back, and Sangyeon can feel him growing harder just at the taste of you in his mouth.

His eyes drift shut, his hands grabbing your thighs and pulling you impossibly closer to his mouth. His neck has tipped back at an awkward angle, one that he knows is going to hurt later, but right now? With your pussy dripping against his face and the pretty little moans and whines you release? Sangyeon couldn’t care less. He's enraptured by you. He's obsessed with your taste, and he knows that even if he doesn't like sweets, he'd make an exception just for you.

“Sangyeon,” you’re breathless, pitch raising as he sucks at your clit, laving over it with his tongue. “Sangyeon, please.”

“Please what, cupcake?” His voice is muffled, not even bothering to pull away from you, and the vibrations of his voice have your back arching. “What do you need?”

“Need you inside of me,” you whine. “Please, please I need you so bad. Been waiting for so long. Haven’t you been waiting for me?”

You’re a seductress, Sangyeon decides. A succubus. Sent here to torment him. To get him drunk on you, so much so that he’ll never want to leave. So much so that he’d sell his soul just to get a taste of your nectar one more time.

“Have to make you cum, cupcake,” he denies your pretty little begs. “Wanna make you cum, just once before I fuck you. Please? Please let me make you cum?” His eyes are glowing in the light of the bakery, and you let out a high-pitched whine. He doesn’t wait for your response this time. He drowns himself in your pussy, tongue reaching inside of you for as much of your arousal as he can get. He sucks harshly on your clit, teeth grazing it and drawing loud cries from your lips.

Your legs tremble. A knot is growing in the pit of your stomach. Your body jerks.

“Oh, fuck, Sangyeon-” Your cry trails off into a loud whine, your orgasm washing over you like a wildfire. Sangyeon drinks you up like he’s been in a desert for a week without water, moaning just as loud as you. Getting drunk on the feeling of your thighs shaking around his head, overstimulating you as you come down from your high.

He doesn’t pull away until you physically kick him away from you. His face is drenched in your juices, his eyes glazed with need, and you have a sneaking suspicion that if you asked, he would crawl over and drag another orgasm out of you in no time at all.

But you don’t ask. You need him inside of you so desperately that now you’re the one crawling to him. He’s still fully dressed as you perch your body over his, your core pressed right up against the bulge in his pants. His hands are tight on your hips, and he watches as you tug his sweatshirt up his body.

“Did you plan for this to happen?” You smirk when you find bare skin under the soft hoodie. Bare, golden, skin, with toned abs like no other. Fuck maybe you were gonna get drunk on him.

He grins at you. “Maybe I did, maybe I didn’t. What are you gonna do about it?” You click your tongue and slide off of him to sit on the counter. He sits up, eyebrows knit together as you swing your legs and smile at him.

“Planned or not,” you hum, “you should probably fuck me before I change my mind and eat that birthday cake on my own.” Sangyeon scoffs, but he’s pulling his pants down his legs and walking over to you without another word.

You, on the other hand, are taken completely aback. He’s big. Like…big in both length and girth. You wonder if you’d be able to wrap your hand around it, but you don’t get the time to think about it before Sangyeon is in front of you, tearing open a foil packet and rolling the condom onto his cock.

“Is it gonna fit, do you think?” You reach your hand forward, wrapping your hand around it. You were right.

Sangyeon hisses at the contact of your hand wrapping around his sensitive cock. “We’ll have to see, won’t we?”

You smile, your legs wrapping around his waist and tugging him closer to you. Your hand is still on him, guiding him to your entrance. You both hiss at the initial push into you. It stings, the stretch more than you’ve had in quite a while.

“Shit, you’re tight,” Sangyeon grips your thighs tightly, his fingers holding you so tightly that you swear there will be bruises after this. You whine, your arms coming up to wrap around his shoulders.

His arms slide up, holding you close to him as he continues to press inside of you. Sangyeon whispers words of comfort into your ear. He pauses whenever you whine in discomfort, hushing you as he continues to push into you. He bites his tongue every time your pussy clenches around him, muffling the groans that threaten to escape.

You, on the other hand, are moaning shamelessly despite the discomfort. You can feel him everywhere, touching every inch of you and just kissing that sweet spot inside of you. Every time he pushes further into you, once the sting passes, the pleasure is quick to replace it. It overpowers every other emotion inside of you. Your legs wrap tighter around him, forcing those last few inches into you until his hips are pressed tightly against your own and his breathing grows shaky again. You clench around him, and his body jerks.

“Little tease,” he practically growls. “Clenching around me like you want me to cum too fast.” You laugh, but it cuts into a moan when he pulls out a few inches and shoves himself back in. Your nails dig into the back of his neck, your fingers lacing into his hair and pulling lightly. "Feels so good, Yeonnie.”

“Weren’t you the one that said that was a dog's name?” He moves slowly against you, and at first, you don’t respond, your lips attached to his shoulder and sucking dark marks into the skin. “Cupcake, careful with the marks.” Sangyeon pinches the skin of your thigh and you whine.

“Stop complaining and just fuck me already,” you plead. Sangyeon smiles.

“Whatever you say, cupcake.” You can’t get another word out. Sangyeon pushes you onto your back, barely giving you time to adjust to how he feels in this new position before he’s thrusting harshly inside of you.

He’s harsh with his pace, each thrust punching the air out of your lungs, forcing out moans and cries and begs for him to go faster, harder, right there oh god right there Sangyeon. He lowers his mouth to your shoulder, giving you the same treatment he’d just scolded you for, listening to everything you say and every sound you make as he does. The sound of his hips slapping against yours is so loud and he can feel your arousal dripping down your pretty cunt and allowing him to go faster, to fuck you harder.

Then he sees it. It’s faint, but when he looks down at you he can see the outline of his cock pressing against your stomach. His pace stutters, and you whine when he slows down.

“Cupcake, look at you.” He coos, grabbing the hand that’s in his hair and bringing it down to your stomach. You raise your head, eyes fluttering when he thrusts again but you can feel the bulge against your stomach. You force your eyes to stay open the next time he thrusts into you, whining when you see it. “So fucking pretty, baby. So fucking pretty, and so small that my cock is pressing against your tummy, wanting to get out, hm?” You whine again, raising your hips to meet every thrust.

He’s getting close. He can feel it. Every thrust, every clench, every whine. It’s all drawing him closer and closer to the edge, and he knows you can feel his cock twitching inside of you. He knows that you’re getting close again, he can feel the way your walls are fluttering around him rather than persistently clenching.

“Are you close baby?” His hand comes up to rest next to your head, and you whine.

“So close, Yeonnie. Please I’m so close-” Your hips stutter against him, and the knot in your stomach goes tight.

Sangyeon swears he goes blind for a moment with how hard his eyes roll back. His body shakes against yours, his cum filling the condom to the brim. Your back arches, your chests brushing together and he wraps one hand around your back, pressing against your shoulder blades to hold you close to him while the two of you ride out your highs. Both of you are panting, your bodies slick with sweat, and you can only imagine what anyone walking outside is thinking-

“Oh my god, we just fucked in my bakery.” You sit upright, your head knocking against Sangyeon’s in the process. He snorts, rubbing where you just hit him.

“You’re realizing this now?” You smack his arm, and he laughs, pulling away from you. The two of you are quiet for a few minutes, quietly cleaning up and getting dressed. Well…Sangyeon gets dressed. You’re stuck on the counter, your legs proving to be useless now. Sangyeon smiles at this, grabbing your clothes for you and helping you tug your jeans on.

“We’re not fucking in here again.” He quirks an eyebrow.

“So what you’re saying is my car is next?” You punch his arm again, but he just laughs. “I’m kidding.”

“Are you though?”

“...”

“Lee Sangyeon!” He laughs again, taking you by the hand to keep you steady on your feet. The two of you stand there for a few minutes, in the middle of your bakery with the orange glow of the fairy lights.

“Did you mean what you said?” You ask, letting him lead you back to the table you’d left the cake on.

“About what?” Sangyeon peers at you, his head tilted.

“About not liking sweets.” Your cheeks are warm. It’s a silly question, but it had bugged you. Sangyeon smiles, ducking his head.

“Yeah… I was really just here for the coffee.”

“Then…Why did you take what I gave you?” You pout. “If I had known you didn’t like that stuff, I would’ve given you something else!”

“Because I like how happy you sounded when I told you the recipes you were trying tasted fantastic.” He says simply. “I would hate if I said or did anything that made you upset.”

“But you…” you purse your lips. “Then why did you run away? I know that you said someone had…betrayed you before…but did you really think I would do that to you?”

Sangyeon sighs.

“I didn’t know. Obviously, I trusted you- I trust you. But…somewhere inside of me I just couldn’t help but be a bit too cautious. I couldn’t stop myself from being afraid that this would turn out just like that relationship did, you know?” You nod, drumming your fingers on the table. “Can I see the cake you made me now?”

“After all that, you wanna see the cake now?” You scoff and he grins at you, tugging the box toward him. “Whatever. It’s nothing special anyway.”

“Anything you make me is special.” He argues, flipping open the lid of the box. He gasps.

“Do you like it?” Sangyeon doesn’t respond. You get nervous. “Yeonnie?”

“Oh, you want me sooooo bad.”

TAGLIST: @winterchimez @juyeonszn

#itsbeeble #itsbeeble fics #kpop #kpop imagines #kpop angst #kpop fluff #kpop smut #the boyz #the boyz imagines #the boyz fluff #the boyz angst #the boyz smut #lee sangyeon #lee sangyeon imagines #lee sangyeon smut #lee sangyeon fluff #lee sangyeon angst #the boyz x reader #sangyeon x reader

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withloveilya · 1 year ago

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short books recs (under 200 pages)

1. Sweet Bean Paste by Durian Sukegawa

This book follows Sentaro, who runs a dorayaki stall, and his friendship with Tokue, who makes killer sweet bean paste. It is a heart-warming and endearing story that brings you comfort. I love the friendship between Sentaro and Tokue, especially seeing how it develops. The ending feels a little rushed. I kind of wished it was longer. Kind of sad. I cried. 10/10 would read again.

2. Before the Coffee Gets Cold by Toshikazu Kawaguchi

The Funiculi Funicula cafe provides a time-traveling service, and the book, divided into four parts, retells different characters' experiences traveling in time. I always associate time-traveling with angst and regret, and this book has just that. I love how each part explores different relationship dynamics, so the time-traveling experience varies for each character. Very heart-warming, but very emotional as well. Cried a lot. It's a series but you don't have to read other books. But if you want more info on the cafe and the characters' backstory, then I highly recommend reading the other books.

3. Heaven by Mieko Kawakami

This book revolves around two students, who are victims of bullying. Due to their shared struggle, a friendship blossoms between them. The depiction of bullying and its impacts is raw and authentic, the story providing the perspectives of both the victims and the perpetrators. It was a rage-inducing but thought-provoking read.

4. The Travelling Cat Chronicles by Hiro Arikawa

This book follows Nana the cat as he embarks on a road-trip with his owner, Satoru. Now, cats are my absolute weakness. I love cats. I WOULD DIE FOR THEM. Which is why reading this book was hard and painful. The writing is witty, since it is written from the perspective of a cat. The plot itself is kind of predictable, but it doesn't make it any less painful. Tldr; Shredded my heart into pieces. Cried so hard, I couldn't breathe.

5. Almond by Won-Pyung Sohn

The story follows the main character, Yunjae, who suffers from a rare condition called Alexithymia that essentially makes him unable to feel emotions. Due to that, he couldn't understand social cues so people shun him. The development of the story centers on the people Yunjae are going to meet, and how his relationship with these people develops. The ending felt a little anticlimactic, but I loved it nonetheless.

6. Eartheater by Dolores Reyes

The unnamed protagonist can locate missing people and find out their fate by eating dirt, so people seek her to know the fate of their missing loved ones. It was definitely an interesting read, with elements of magical realism in relation to the protagonist's ability. It is also an intriguing depiction of femicide, a reflection of a system that continuously fails women. I felt rage for the women failed by the system and the sufferings they had to endure at the hands of hateful men.

7. A House is a Body by Shruti Swamy

This book is a collection of short stories, which is a raw and authentic depiction of what it is like being human. I enjoyed certain stories, while some left me utterly confused. The narratives are enticing and poetic, so despite some stories not hitting that hard, I enjoyed the writing.

8. The Vegetarian by Han Kang

After having a bizarre dream, Yeong-Hye declares that she is turning vegetarian, and this sudden change concerned her family. I made the mistake of thinking that this book is merely a depiction of what it's like to be a vegetarian. HELL NO. It utterly deviates from my expectation. I could only describe the book as bizarre and spooky, in an unconventional way. It depicts the complexity of the human mind when the contraint of societal expectations is disregarded.

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bimboothefool · 1 year ago

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𝔒𝔲𝔯 ℑ𝔫𝔰𝔦𝔡𝔢𝔰 𝔄𝔯𝔢 ℜ𝔢𝔡

𝐘𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐞!𝐖𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐰𝐨𝐥𝐟!𝐀𝐝𝐚 𝐖𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐱 𝐅!𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

“𝒴𝑜𝓊 𝓁𝑒𝒶𝓋𝑒 𝓂𝑒 𝒽𝒾𝑔𝒽 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝒹𝓇𝓎! 𝒜 𝓇𝓊𝓈𝒽 𝒸𝑜𝓂𝑒𝓈 𝓉𝑜 𝓂𝓎 𝓂𝒾𝓃𝒹 𝒶𝓉 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒹𝓇𝑜𝓅𝓈 𝑜𝒻 𝒷𝓁𝑜𝑜𝒹 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝓁𝑒𝒶𝓋𝑒 𝒷𝑒𝒽𝒾𝓃𝒹! ℛ𝓊𝓃 𝒶𝓈 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝓂𝒾𝑔𝒽𝓉, 𝓂𝓎 𝓁𝑜𝓋𝑒 𝓌𝒾𝓁𝓁 𝓃𝑒𝓋𝑒𝓇, 𝑒𝓋𝑒𝓇 𝓈𝓉𝑜𝓅.” The Red Means I Love You by Madds Buckley

𝔖𝔱𝔬𝔯𝔶 𝔖𝔶𝔫𝔬𝔭𝔰𝔦𝔰: A mysterious yet familiar looking woman enters your life in the midst of the various murders happening. Yet why and what makes this woman so familiar to you..?

𝔗𝔞𝔟𝔩𝔢 𝔬𝔣 ℭ𝔬𝔫𝔱𝔢𝔫𝔱𝔰: Reader is femme/femme coded and uses she/her, that’s where the specification ends. Mentions of death, details of death through police reports. Stalking, Ada getting jealous and possessive. Might add more later if it pops up.

𝔄𝔲𝔱𝔥𝔬𝔯’𝔰 𝔏𝔢𝔱𝔱𝔢𝔯: Separate ways has been out for awhile now, why not make more fics for Ada. She definitely needs more love. Also this story is heavily inspired by Little Red Riding Hood and The Path. I highly recommend it! Might make more fairytale retellings later down the line. We’ll see~ Feel free to read it on Ao3!

The combination of the stench of booze, noisy crowd and blasting music. Was practically sensory hell.

You decided to use an excuse to get some fresh air as a way to escape the bar’s suffocating atmosphere. As your footsteps echoed and the crowd’s chatter grows more quiet, you reminisce on the dreams you’ve been having as of lately.

“A forest graveyard, dead tree and a girl in red turning into a wolf… What does it mean…” You remembered talking to your mom about what you dreamt about and she recalls the times your childhood friend Claire searched for you. She found you sleeping against a tree that was in the deeper parts of the forest. She didn’t always come alone, Chris accompanied her just to be safe.

However a part of your brain couldn’t shake off the feeling that you were missing something crucial. Like your version of events isn’t right.

“Mom keeps saying these are signs, yet I’m not sure what they’re telling me…” You clutched your coat tighter around your form, trying to keep yourself safe from the cold night air. You unconsciously walked towards the forest, you remember this path. Your senses kick in as you sent your location to your friend group chat, just so that they won’t run around looking for you, like chickens without their heads.

As you walked along the path, you saw a playground sign, along with a yellow flower. Putting it in your coat pocket. “I remember this park, me and Claire would always explore here as kids.” You plucked the yellow flower from the ground and walked into the forest, sending your location again. So far they don’t seem to notice that you left the party to explore the woods.

All you could see was the bright full moon shining above you and what you can hear is your footsteps crunching the dead leaves underneath. You arrived at the playground noticing that it’s metal parts were not treated so kindly by time. Yet the memories it held still filled you with relief, you sat on the swing set.

The faint smell of flowers, the fall breeze and the cool sensation of the wind, felt like it made your stress get blown away.

You took the yellow flower out of your pocket, lightly twirling it in your hand. Currently pondering on what has been happening lately. The talk of monsters or monster murdering people left and right, changing the lock on your door. It was weighing on your mind so heavily especially when something broke into your house.

The party was supposed to lift your mood, yet it did nothing to deter the sinking feeling that you were being watched and everything you did was under a microscope.

You just wanted to— “Mind if I sit here?” A woman’s voice brought you out of your spiraling thoughts. “O-Oh! Umm… Uhhh…sure go ahead.” You looked away from her brown eyes. It’s almost like they’re looking into your soul or can see your skeleton.

She sat down and swung slightly, her red nails shone under the moonlight. You couldn’t help, but feel like you’ve seen her before. Especially those brown eyes. Your mind flashes the memory of the girl in red, as she looks towards you, her eyes become clear to see. They’re brown as well. “What’s a girl like you doing out here, alone?” Her voice snaps you out of your thoughts.

You fiddled with the yellow flower once more trying to put yourself at ease. “I…needed fresh air and some alone time…” You answered softly, almost as a whisper that was only meant for her ears.

“So you went to the park deep into the forest for that?” You realized now how dangerous your choice was, yeah you let your friends know where you are, but who knows what or who will seek you. “Dumb I know, but I just don’t want to burden anyone right now… I’d just kill the mood.”

The chains rattle as she places her hand over yours, her warmth reaching to your heart. The flower peeking from your joined hands. You shouldn’t be falling in love so easily with a stranger and yet she feels so familiar. The isolation and alienation makes you cling to any sense of familiarity no matter how innocent it may seem.

“Ada, my name is Ada. And yours?” She introduced herself, slightly swinging you both. “Ada…” You let it slip off your tongue, the name is also familiar too. You tell her your name and you see a smile grace her glossed up lips. “That’s a pretty name.” You felt your cheeks get warm as your heart beats faster. “Thanks Ada…” Ada giggles at your shy reply.

You spent the time just talking and now, Ada’s making you a flower crown with a couple of yellow flowers and daisies she found. She gently placed the crown on your head, smiling warmly at you.

As you two stared into eachother’s eyes, it was almost as if time started to slow down, but it suddenly starts again once your phone goes off. “Are you gonna answer it?” Ada teased as you pout, hurriedly grabbing your phone from your pocket. “Thank god you picked up! We were worried sick!” Claire’s voice rang clear, you decided to just tell to her why you wandered off. “Yeah sorry I worried you, I just didn’t wanna kill the mood with my paranoia…” You could almost hear her smile as she laughed. “You kill the mood? Hardly, besides your feelings are valid. Especially with everything that’s happened. At least we got you out of the house and tried.”

“I’m gonna head back to the bar right now. Hopefully it won’t be far.” Both you and Claire mutually hung up as you turned on the GPS on your phone on. “Wanna head back with me?” You asked Ada holding out your hand for her.

Ada’s eyes widened at your hand and offer. “Oh… Okay, lead the way.” She says and gently takes your hand, leading you two out of the forest. Right back on the path you came from as the crickets chirped, you at the crescent moon shining above you. Now that you hear her footsteps along with yours, it frankly made you feel reassured and safe.

Claire being shocked was an understatement and frankly, this mystery woman appearing with you walking back in the bar. Hand and hand has left her severely confused. “Ada Wong… Hmmm…” She looks on as Ada lights up the room. The way you two have interacted thus far made her think she’s a childhood friend of yours. Yet she’s known you since you were infants, Claire knows your deepest, most intimate secrets yet she can’t really recall who Ada could be.

But the feeling that Ada’s presence was odd didn’t shake off even when she smiled or laughed. It felt fake, it all felt like it was scripted and the unsuspecting were gobbling Ada’s act right up.

‘Whoever Ada is… I have a feeling we’ve seen her before.’ Claire silently vowed in her head, soon Ada caught a glimpse of Claire’s face. Her concerned look only fuels Ada further. Her hand drapes over your shoulder possessively. Silently telling Claire to back off.

“She’s gotta be kidding me…” Claire mumbles in disbelief.

Weeks turned to months and months turned into a year. After two months, it wasn’t long before you started to date Ada. She was always so loving and dotting, you are everything to her. You were spending a sickeningly long amount of time with Ada.

Though throughout that duration of time, Claire decided to look into her. Starting up a silent investigation on Ada’s background. Oddly enough when she tried looking into her general history, not much came up. No birth certificate, prior home addresses or even a family member. It was just blank dead end after blank dead end.

So when the computer data failed, she asked the locals more specifically Ada’s neighbors. They all said she’d just miraculously moved here one day and is generally a kind woman. However a select few of them, feel like there’s something off about her especially since they’ve never seen her come home in the early hours of dawn. However they did note that they’ve seen a large dog like creature around the area.

Claire with a clearer idea, decides to back home to take a look at the victims one more time, after clicking through online pages of police reports, she suddenly realizes some of them are your ex’s and a couple of them are people who’ve flirted with you. She vividly recognizes you dating one of them in senior year of highschool, another during your freshman year of college and the guy hitting on you during the party she took you to. The day you introduced Ada. The murders seemed to have suddenly stopped once you started dating her and nobody’s been harmed since then.

It was either the worst timing or Ada’s genuinely tied to the murders that had happened prior to Claire meeting her.

Claire looks through the files especially in regards to the pattern. Claire was beyond mortified. “The only thing tying the victims together was the method of murder. Claw marks and puncture wounds, yet animal researchers were unable to identify which animal it could belong to. Furthermore the zoos in the nearby area have yet to file a missing animal case…” Claire looks around feeling herself being watched, she quickly gets up to lock all of her doors, windows and whatever entrance there may be.

Claire heads back into her room, opening her laptop again and decides to look into potential sightings about a dog like creature near the town. Not much showed up, only local paranormal blogs have picked up the story and catalogued this creature’s appearances. Soon she finds one with photo evidence, her heart begins to stop. Those eyes, she remembers them.

Those cold, blood thirsty eyes, from all those years ago. Claire immediately shuts off the laptop, hurriedly getting dressed. She quickly dials your number, yet she’s getting no answer. “SHIT!”

“I’m really worried about Claire… She’s been off lately…” Your eyes trailed to the side of the forest path as you and Ada walked side by side. “Hey, don’t worry about her, I’m sure she’s fine.” Ada said nonchalantly, still you really couldn’t shake the feeling of concern for Claire’s wellbeing off. “Still she usually has a reason… I dunno, maybe you’re right, I’m probably overreacting..?” Your eyes looked at Ada’s, trying to find a small semblance of reassurance.

Ada leans closer, her warm hand cups your cheek. Her thumb gently strokes the apple of your cheek. “No it’s understandable that you’re worried for her.” You sigh and held her hand that was on your cheek, leaning into her palm.

“…Thanks Ada, really it means a lot…” Ada hums and smooches your forehead. “I have to keep my princess grounded, don’t I?” You laugh dryly and smiled. “Guess so.” You and Ada walked off the path once more, heading towards a very familiar place. It was the forest graveyard you’ve been seeing in your dreams.

Being here sent chills down your spine, a gut wrenching feeling has your stomach unsettled. You feel like you shouldn’t be here.

The same decaying tree stands tall on the small hill as tombstones surround it. Ada turns to you and tilts her head. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost. Something wrong?” You felt your body move on its own, making your way towards the dead tree. Ada calls out your name yet you cannot hear her.

Your memories started flowing back in all at once. Ada calls out your name and your whole world begin to spin. The dizziness makes you fall over, knocking you out effectively.

You heard the crickets chirping, the familiar smell of flowers invades your nose and you opened your eyes.

The full moon shines above you but is a bit filtered by the trees above. The fireflies providing as another source of light. A young girl’s voice calls out your name, it’s the girl in red.

“You always sleep in the strangest places.” She finally becomes clearer, the shadowy silhouette wearing just a red dress is finally melting away. Her eyes, they’re brown and beautiful. Her short black hair sways in the wind. “What’s the matter?” She giggles and you looked to see you’re a kid again. “Ada..?” She smiles at you and laughs. “That’s my name.” Your eyes widened slightly at this revelation. So that’s why she seemed so familiar.

You have met before, long before that night at the playground. Yet something tells you, that’s only a chunk of this story. “Where are we..?” The younger version of Ada replied. “The flower field silly! I promised to take you hear and teach you how to make flower crowns. Remember?” You immediately remember that promise.

“How could I forget that?” You mumbled out, with furrowed brows as Ada tilts her head. Her curious brown eyes looked at your baffled face. “Maybe you’ve been losing sleep?” You murmured a maybe to Ada, you got up. Dusting off the dirt and pollen off your clothes.

Ada grabs your head, urging you to follow her. You decided it was the best course of action for now. The two of you walked together hand in hand. You noticed she wore a messily strung together flower crown made of poppy flowers. You reached your head, taking your crown off to see it was more stable and lovingly crafted. The flowers used were white daisies.

“C’mon let’s go princess!” Ada happily said, pulling you along as the two of you reached the forest graveyard. The two of you reached the small hill where the decaying tree resides. You sat down with Ada as she warmly hugs you, cuddling with you. Your heart skipped a beat, at this familiar comfort you’ve been desperately seeking. Yet this felt wrong.

Extremely wrong, the familiar stomach knotting feeling returned once another familiar voice called out your name

“Claire..?” Ada’s eyes snapped towards a younger Claire. “Who’s this..?”

Claire worriedly asked, Ada gently pushes you behind her. She stalks towards Claire, staring knives into her form. “I’m her future wife and best friend.” Ada said in a matter of fact way, Claire looked confused.

“Don’t be stupid! I’m here to take my friend back home, her mom’s worried sick!” Claire stomps over to you, but Ada blocks her way. “No her mom doesn’t need to worry. She’s in under my protection.” Ada smiled stiffly at Claire. “Move! She has to go home, you two can always play tomorrow!” Claire said roughly shoving Ada to the ground, running towards you.

Claire takes your hand as she said. “You’re explaining this later. For now let’s go home.” The two of you turned to see Ada changing. Her bones snapping into a new shape, her hair growing longer and spreading throughout her new form. Her face turning into a wolf’s snout, sporting razor sharp teeth. Her once human ears became wolf like as well. Her brown eyes stare at Claire’s blue eyes with disgust and hatred.

All that stood was a monstrous wolf that barely resembles Ada. You stood there, your eyes widened with fear and realization. Those dreams, were a warning and you were a fool to not heed them. Something big outside of this dream was waiting for your present self and you wanted out so you could do something about it.

Ada roared and lunged at Claire, needing to act quickly you tug Claire’s sleeve and this leads the two of you to roll down the small hill as Ada slams into the tree.

You woke up with a big intake of breathe, clutching your heart. Unable to forget what happened in the dream. Ada was the girl in red, the one who transformed into that wolf like beast. How could you repress such a memory, you asked yourself internally. Yet you had an idea as to why, but couldn’t properly articulate that feeling.

Ada’s soft voice called out your name as her hand was on your shoulder. She wore a genuinely worried look on her face. “Are you okay..? You suddenly passed out and I didn’t know what to do…” You practically tuned her out as you looked to where you fell down the hill with Claire. It was now dark, but the moonlight provided enough light for you too see what you were looking for.

Just as you suspected it wasn’t a nightmare, that event did happen all those years ago. The gravestone you hit your back against was noticeably knocked back a bit, but still stood.

Ada gently shakes your shoulder, calling out your name as she follows your gaze. Her voice dies down in her throat. “…Oh.” Her almond nails dig themselves into your clothed shoulder possessively.

You perk up at the sound of Claire yelling out your name. “Claire..? CLAIRE NO STAY AWAY!” You yelled trying to discourage her to stay away and let you deal with Ada alone.

“NO I’M NOT LEAVING YOU!” Claire yelled back as you see her running towards you and you felt your body move on its own. Not deterred by Ada’s grip on your shoulder. You pushed her hand off and ran towards Claire trapping her in a tight hug. She returns it tenfold as Ada watches on with a blank stare.

Ada had worked so hard, and she doesn’t want to lose you again. Not to some silly human girl.

“I have so much to tell you, it’s about… Ada…” Claire’s eyes glared at Ada, whilst Ada sighs heavily. “Tell me something I don’t know…” You knew that from the dream alone, something much worse has reeled its head towards Claire.

“Those murders, the stalking it was all Ada… She’s not from here or even like us…” You felt a lump in your throat, the part of Ada being a monster you already knew. But the murders, the stalking it all made sense now.

“Why do this Ada..? Do you enjoy seeing me scared? Please talk to—“ You were cut off as Ada confessed. “I loved you.” You were utterly shocked by this. “Loved me..? But why kill those people, what did they do to you..?”

Ada sighs as she walks down the hill slowly and says. “They were obstacles and defective. Why not get rid of them, people like them just come and they go.” She continues to get closer as Claire drags you away. This doesn’t stop Ada, she raises her hand. Her nails effortlessly getting sharp. “And the only obstacle left, is Claire.”

You felt your blood run cold, you couldn’t help, but feel like their deaths were your shoulders. Even if Ada was your childhood friend and girlfriend, you still don’t want more people dying in your name or be hurt by Ada’s hand.

“Chris is on his way with backup. Get out of here!” Claire pulls out a gun, Ada huffs and knows it’s no use hiding anything anymore.

Your eyes looked at the moon, it was a full moon tonight. She quickly transforms into her true form, her bones snapping and contorting into a new shape. As she becomes that same black furred werewolf with razor sharp teeth, claws and her brown eyes had a red hue to them.

Claire pulls out her gun and starts trying shooting Ada’s leg to give you two an opening. Yet Ada was moving around swiftly, dodging the bullets with ease. You huffed and take Claire’s hand, running as fast as you two could. Zigzagging through the trees trying to shake Ada’s true form.

Once you lost her, but unfortunately you two weren’t out of the woods yet. You and Claire catch your breathe, the brunette beside you gasped as she walks over to something. You lifted your head and see her and a motorcycle that’s nature definitely got a hold of. “Hmmm… Maybe there’s a key around, odd that the tanks half full…” Claire murmured as something shined in the moonlight. You walked over to it and saw a key, you grabbed it and dusted off the dirt.

You showed her the key and her eyes light up. “That’s it! Let’s hope this is the key and we’ll hopefully be able to get out of this forest to meet up with Chris.” You hummed at her plan, helping her set the motorcycle up. Claire gets on and starts it up, the engine purrs to life. “C’mon hop on!” You nodded, suddenly your blood runs cold once you picked up on the sound of a growl. You hurriedly got on, grabbing onto Claire for dear life.

Claire soon drives it fast enough to dodge Ada’s pounce. You screamed as you smoosh your face on Claire’s back, Claire’s head was in this chase. If Ada wanted you, Ada’s gonna have to fight her first. As she swerved the motorcycle through the area, she sees the path through one of the tree. She makes a break for it hoping it’ll take Ada out of her element.

Claire repeatedly mumbled. “We’re gonna make it, we’re gonna make it…” She cranks up the speed as you two were out of the woods and back on the path. However as you two tried to make your exit, Ada swipes her claws at the motorcycle causing it to swerve violently to the opposite direction.

“Shit—!” You blurted whilst you lost your grip on Claire’s jacket. You felt yourself tumble and roll back onto the ground. You groaned, feeling a hot breathe on your face as you froze. Ada stares down at you, her now larger form covers your form.

“Ada… Please…” You pleaded, Claire screams out for you and a crazy idea strikes your brain. A crazy, potentially deadly idea. It may not make sense to Claire now, but if this can hold Ada back from going on a rampage. You’d rather take that brunt than let others get brutally killed.

“Claire, I want you to leave…” Claire’s eyes widened. “Are you fucking serious?! I’m not losing you, whatever you’re thinking please just—“

“I’m being dead fucking serious, Claire.” You turned your head to look at her, still on the ground as Ada watches you. “If Ada wants me and it stops the murders… I’ll let her have me…” You decided to do it not only for yourself, but for everyone.

“Besides, I made a promise. I promised to marry Ada, I just wanna honor that promise…” You knew how crazy it sounds, but it was the point. You needed to keep Ada away from Claire, Chris and everyone you cared about as far as possible.

Ada’s tail wags in delight at the prospect of you remembering her promise. “You promised to marry her..? Why if I can ask..?” You sighed and answered Claire honestly. “She’s my first love, I don’t wanna give up on what I started…”

Claire sorrowfully mumbled your name, knowing how hard it was to express that side of you. “Please Claire, just leave…” Claire stays for a bit, her lips quiver as her eyes became glossy. “Okay… I understand…” She starts the engine again and soon drives off. Leaving you with Ada and the sounds of nature.

Ada stares down at you with an unreadable expression or atleast given she’s in her wolf form so there’s probably not enough muscles in her face in this current form. She gets off of you, only to toss you over her shoulder. Walking back into the woods, back to where everything between you two had started.

This sick and twisted love story, you looked at the back of Ada’s head and the full moon one last time. As much as you wanted to protect your loved ones, Ada meant too much for you to let go. You just wanted to be with her, whether it was genuine or not. You feel like you can sort it out later.

Several years passed and so far, Claire hasn’t heard a peep about any wolf sightings or murders. It was gut wrenching to tell Chris, your family and friends that you were gone. It left them shaken to their core, others tried to brave through life without you. Others were stagnant and were unable to really move on. To the townspeople it was a relief that left them with paranoia and trauma. However Claire, was slowly giving up on finding you. Your words echoed in her mind.

Soon she heads out to check her mailbox. As she sifts through the junk mail, bills and others. Her eyes widen as she reached her home again. A letter with a poppy and daisy held together by a red wax seal. She turns it around, it had no return address and it was for her from, you. Her breathe hitched as she closes the door and sits down at her kitchen table. She opens the letter, it was general update and to let Claire know you’re still alive and are being treated well.

This fuels her further to push harder to find you, to give you the truth and to finally free you from your shackles.

You sat at the table as you looked outside the window as Ada cooks your food. You hoped the letter reaches Claire and to put her search for you to a halt. “Hey, are you okay..?” Ada’s voice lifts you out of your thoughts, your eyes looked towards hers. “Yeah I was thinking about something…”

“Go on, you can tell me anything…” Ada sighs and turns off the stove and places the food on two plates. “I just don’t want to be found is all.” You didn’t want her to see your real colors. You wanted to keep your promise both the ones you Ada’s and Claire’s.

“I see, but just next time don’t send another letter. Before you ask, I’ve always known. I could smell the faint smell of melted wax from a mile away. You’ve always were a terrible liar, but don’t worry. I’ll have you be my good girl in no time…” Ada grabs your face with one hand, pulling you towards her face. Her fangs glint in the sunlight as her claws sink slightly into your cheeks. “Now do you understand..?”

“Yes dear…”

#my writing #fairytale retelling #fairytale au #ada wong #re4 ada #ada wong x reader #ada wong x you #ada wong x y/n #resident evil 4 x reader #re4 x reader #ada x reader

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steddieunderdogfics · 3 months ago

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This week’s writer spotlight feature is: @lady-lostmind! lady_lostmind has 84 works in the Stranger Things fandom and 55 of them are in the Steddie tag!

@oh-stars recommends the following works by @lady-lostmind:

This Is The Coin I Had In My Pocket The First Time We Kissed, And I Always Have It.

Transfixed (under your spell)

Fuck

You know what to do, when it gets hold of you.

The Wall

"Mack is one of the best writers in this ship and I am so very lucky to read their work early on. Her Eddie voice is unmatched to me!! Every time I read a new fic of hers, I'm always shocked at how she can outdo herself with creating my next favorite fic. She's fearless in trying new tropes and genres, exploring super serious topics and she has some of the hottest scenes I've read. Every opportunity I have to read or reread her work is an absolute pleasure and I am so honored to get to see her flourish!" -- @oh-stars

Below the cut, @lady-lostmind answered some questions about their writing process and some of their recommended work!

Why do you write Steddie?

I’ve been reading fanfic since I was a teenager but I never felt the urge to write my own until watching these two together. I think we can all agree there was some undeniable chemistry between the two on screen and they have such a fun dynamic to work with. I’ve always enjoyed creative writing in some shape or form whether it be for a class or writing lyrics for the band I was in, or the half abandoned novel I have in my docs. I decided to give fanfic a shot and then really loved getting to actually be a part of the community instead of lurking on the edges and leaving kudos anonymously like I had for years. But there is something so special about Steddie in particular and I’m especially drawn to writing Eddie in particular. His character has so many layers to explore and different directions to go and I love making him fall in love with his golden retriever of a man over and over again.

What’s your favorite trope to READ?

I am a sucker for a good slow burn, especially with some hurt/comfort thrown in. Please rip my heart out, stomp on it, pick it back up, and hand it back to me wrapped in a pretty little bow.

What’s your favorite trope to WRITE?

Honestly, the same as what I read. As much as I love a good fluffy one shot there’s nothing quite like the sweet torture of dragging your characters through hell before they get their happy ending. It’s so fun trying to navigate what they would do in difficult situations, and how that affects the story overall.

What’s your favorite Steddie fic?

This is such a hard question. There are so many good fics out there. We’re truly well fed in this community. I think some of my absolute favorites have to be You’re Divine by oonionchiver, and The most remarkable thing about you standing in the doorway is that it’s you by greatunironic. Both of them inspired me to do a lot of fanart including a bind and cover art for You’re Divine, and drawing all the album covers in TMRTAYSITDITIY.

Is there a trope you’re excited to explore in a future work but haven’t yet?

I never really know what I’m going to write next until it smacks me in the face. But I’m definitely open to whatever that might be. I will say I’ve never ventured into the omegaverse in my writing but it does seem like a fun one to play around with.

What is your writing process like?

Chaotic. I love writing but have a hard time actually sitting down and focusing on it. I either write a huge chunk all at once, or I write a sentence at a time while watching tv or something. I do really enjoy writing with other people though whether that’s in a sprint or word game.

Do you have any writing quirks?

If I have music on while writing it can’t have any lyrics in it or I get too distracted.

Do you prefer posting when you’ve finished writing or on a schedule?

Oh, a schedule is generous, I’d say. But I do prefer posting chapter by chapter. I feel like people engage a little more as they read each one and I love getting the feedback as I go.

Which fic are you most proud of?

And you may find yourself in a beautiful house, with a beautiful wife. I think my writing grew a lot during that fic and I’m really proud of the work I put into it. AYMFYIABHWABW was also the first thing I ever wrote for an event and was a big step for me to actually put myself out there and talk with other authors and artists. I made some amazing connections through that event and am so glad I pushed through any self consciousness to ask for a beta reader because I found an amazing one in oh-stars and gained a great friendship through that. They introduced me to karadanverss when the two of them were looking for some help modding the Stranger Things Reverse Big Bang and I not only gained another friend, but got to dip my toe into being a mod, something I never would have even considered doing before, but have had so much fun being a part of as we set up other events together. So I think because of all that, AYMFYIABHWABW will always hold a special place in my heart.

How did you get the idea for This Is The Coin I Had In My Pocket The First Time We Kissed, And I Always Have It.?

During a rewatch of New Girl. Nick Miller is honestly such a mash up of Eddie and Steve, and I could not get the idea out of my head to Steddiefy the scene in the hall where Nick says “Not like this.” It screams hopeless romantic Steve to me, and the title is a line Nick says to Jess way later and it never fails to make me cry. So, I started with that. Just wanting to do a similar situation with Steddie, and it morphed into something much bigger than I intended.

When writing You know what to do, when it gets hold of you., what was something you didn’t expect?

I thought I would have a harder time with Steve’s POV in this one than I did. I really wanted to show a side of him that I feel gets overlooked a lot since he’s always throwing himself in front of everyone else when there’s danger. But what happens when that danger isn’t there anymore? What does he do with that? It’s a side I hadn’t explored much before and I was really happy with where that took me. I really liked getting to see where Steve’s mind would go when the group is seemingly safe.

What inspired Transfixed (under your spell)?

Transfixed was written for the Steddie Summer Exchange! So I actually had this prompt: ‘Popstar Steve and rockstar Eddie having a secret relationship whilst the public and their own band mates think they hate each other.’ to go off of for it. This prompt screamed angsty, hurt/comfort so I was really excited I snagged it in claims.

What was your favorite part to write from You know what to do, when it gets hold of you.?

I think it has to be the scene where Steve finally breaks down. When Eddie figures out what has been going on and Steve just lets it all out. If there is one thing Steve Harrington deserves, it’s a good fucking cry.

How do/did you feel writing The Wall?

The Wall was written for Steddie Love Month with the prompt: Love is letting yourself be loved and if that didn’t scream insecure Steve I don’t know what does. I remember feeling very bittersweet while writing The Wall because I know what it’s like to be afraid to let someone in again when you’ve been hurt, and how good it feels when you finally let that wall down and accept that risk because it’s worth it. I tried to capture that feeling as best as I could.

What was the most difficult part of writing Fuck?

Fuck was another Steddie Love Month prompt. The hardest part of writing this one was just trying not to cackle to myself about how ridiculous Eddie was being. This one was a lot of fun to write.

Do you have a favorite scene and/or line from any of your fics?

Oh my. I think it either has to be the first scene I wrote for AYMFYIABHWABW that sparked the entire thing: Steve is staring at him, eyes wide and rocking a little on his heels like he’s so nervous he can’t stay still. Eddie’s stomach drops, his mind spiraling through a million worst case scenarios all at once. “What’s wrong? Is Wayne– Are the kids okay? Is it–” Steve holds his hands out in front of him and shakes his head. “Fuck, no. Sorry. No. It’s not–” Steve sucks in a deep breath, his hands shooting up into his hair before dropping to hovering in the space between the two of them. “Eds. I fucked up. I so massively fucked up. I can’t even begin to–[...] This feels like a fucking fever dream. Like something he’s imagined a million times over. Awake and asleep, In every possible scenario and position. All the times he fucked men in bathroom stalls and or pressed them against a wall in a dirty alley, this is what he wanted. And he was right. None of it even comes close to being this. This is…it’s everything. Fuck– it’s everything." Or this scene from You know what to do, when it gets hold of you where Steve finally gets to breakdown: Steve shakes against him, his tears wetting the shoulder of Eddie’s shirt. “I’m sorry.” Eddie shakes his head. “It’s okay.” He rubs his hand up and down Steve’s back. “Hey, you’re okay. We’re going to figure this out, okay?” Steve sobs, his hands fisting into Eddie’s shirt a broken “Sorry” slipping out of him again. Eddie’s arms tighten around Steve, and he struggles to swallow the lump forming in his throat, tears welling in his eyes. Can’t help the way his heart breaks a little at the sorrow in Steve’s voice. How vulnerable he sounds. Because Steve Harrington isn’t vulnerable. Steve Harrington dives into lakes with portals to another world at the bottom without a second thought. Steve Harrington rips other dimensional beasts apart with his teeth. Steve Harrington marched into battle calmly, and confidently. Steve Harrington carried Eddie out of a hellscape on his fucking back. Steve Harrington is the rock. He is the one everyone leans on. And Eddie knew. He knew something was wrong. He knew something was going on. But it’s one thing to know it, and another to see your hero crack and crumble in your arms.

Do you have any upcoming projects or fics you’d like to share/promote?

The Eddie Munson Big Bang! Definitely keep an eye on our tumblr (@eddiemunsonbigbang) to see all the amazing fics and art that will be coming out. I’m one of the mods over there, and I’m working on a fic for it that I’m really excited about. If this is posed before the end of September…we’re still looking for artists!

Outside of these questions, Is there anything YOU would like to add?

I’d just really like to thank anyone who has ever taken the time to read my fics, or like any of the fanart I’ve made. I never expected anyone to really see any of it when I first started all this and have really loved finding a community to be a part of. I never had any friends who were really into fandoms or fanfiction, and up until I started engaging in Steddie content no one in my life even knew I read it. Getting to talk to, and make friends in this community gave me the confidence to talk more about what I’m interested in and connect more with the people in my life. So, thank you all for showing me how to be loud about the things I love and that I don’t have to hide parts of myself away!

Thank you to our author, @lady-lostmind, and our nominator, @oh-stars! See more of lady_lostmind's works featured on our page throughout the day!

Writer’s Spotlight is every Wednesday! Want to nominate an author? You can nominate them here!

#writer's spotlight #writer's wednesday #steddie #steddie fic recs #steve harrington #eddie munson #steve x eddie #stranger things #ao3 writer #steddie writers

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woaaahh-itz-caam · 6 days ago

Note

PLEASE YAP ABOUT ERRORMARE IM GONNA MELT

Yes anon of course anon anything for u anon HEHEHEHDHDHDHD

THE SONG “Once more to see you” BY MITSKI IS LITERALLY THEIR SONG AND LET ME TELL YOU EXACTLY WHY BECAUSE I’VE BEEN HOLDING THIS IN FOR SUCH A LONG TIME Y’ALL HAVE NO FUCKING IDEAAAAAA

I’D RECOMMEND Y’ALL TO LISTE TO THE SONG FIRST SO U’LL UNDERSTAND THIS RANT PROPERLY

Okay okay first of all guys cmon its mitski, just because of the fact it’s MITSKI then you already know it’s gonna fit them cuz like??? Bro?? (I love mitski if you couldn’t tell she’s my fav artist lmao) The whole TONE and FEEL of the song already fits them BUT THE LYRICS. MY GOD THE LYRICS.

Y’ALL. PLEASE????? YOU SEE THE VISION RIGHT???? With the hcs i have for both nm and error, none of them would be particularly eager to make their relationship public!! Not due to like fear of being rejected or whatever the hell you might think— its because they would both probably be VERY afraid of showing any sort of vulnerability to ANYONE so PUBLICLY ACKNOWLEDGING YOU HAVE A PARTNER IS LIKE HAVING A DEATH WISH FOR THEM BASICALLY!! Cuz like they think that showing actual emotion is weak and dumb and they’re big bad guys that r very scary soooooooo. U GET THE VISION RIGHT. PLEASE IM NOT INSANE.

And this!! It’s not particularly as deep as the other ones but it still reminds me of them quiet a lot since they do feel like the type of guys to just be content with being in close proximity from each other. Their favorite thing to do would definitely just sit next to each other and just be <33

NOW THIS. THIS IS THE PART THAT MAKES ME GO INSANE CHAT. THE THE THE THE!!! THE!!!!!!!!!! THE RAW YEARNING IN THIS WORDS I CANT EVEN DESCRIBE IT!!! IT FEELS SO TRAGIC YET BEAUTIFUL AT THE SAME TIME!! IT FEELS LIKE HOW YOU WOULD FEEL LOOKING AT YOUR CRUSH FROM ACROSS THE ROOM KNOWING THEY DONT FEEL THE SAME, IT FEELS LIKE WALKING PAST SOMEONE WHO USED TO BE YOUR EVERYTHING BUT NOW’S A STRANGER, IT FEELS LIKE BLORBOS. SOBBING AND SCREAMING AND CRYINGGGGGGG ITS SO INCREDIBLY THEM.

THIS SONG WILL ALWAYS AND FOREVER BE ABOUT THEM FOR ME IM SORRY Y’ALL

I would actually love to do a animatic of them with this song someday!! I’m just kinda scared because whenever i try to start to do these kinds of things i always end up dumping halfway n stuff so sighhhhh

But yea that’s the blorbo song yiipppeee!! I got more songs that also remind me of them and make me just as crazy like this but this specific one will forever be my favorite blorbo song heheheh (also hey anon sorry if this wasn’t the ramble u were hoping to see i kinda got distracted with our lord and savior mitski)

#I LOVE THEM I LOVE THEM I LOVE THEM I #jk im normal #(lie)#I KINDA FEEL BAD THO I FEEL LIKE THIS ISNT WHAT ANON WANTED BUT #GRAHHHH #if y’all want me to yap abt specific things pls tell me i wanna get y’all the right rambles sobs #BUT YEA ANYWAYS I LOVE U MITSKI AND I LOVE U ERRORMARE #WOOOOOOOOO #errormare #darkchocolate #utmv

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cuddl3s4shur1 · 2 years ago

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Hey! Can I get a Shuri or Shuriri x reader where the reader has really bad period cramps and she doesn’t want to bother them so she suffers in silence until Shuri and riri find out?

I hope this make sense <3

Have a great day/night!❤️❤️

Of course you can thanks 😊

ㅤㅤ✷ ࣭ ࣪ ˖ ☞ ࣭ ࣪ ᩠ ֗ ✦ ࣭ ࣪ ˖

Why Didn't You Tell Us

Shuriri x Black Fem Reader

Summary: As you become more distant between your girlfriends they wonder why and find out that your on your period.

Warning: Fluff just cute

Series Or Oneshot: Oneshot

Authors Note:Thank you guys for requesting . Also the take time part should be done now . Hold means flashback

Request

Taglist: @tuesdaylovesu(wifey fr) @locoforshuri @letitias-fav @saintwrld @yvxmpire @ziayamikaelson @lunax0654 @writesbyriri @adeola-the-explorer @2k7-sparkles @shuri-my-love @shuriislut @womenlxver @secretgyals @xxmilli @randomhoex @atssukoo @niaalove

(If you want to be added fill out the form)

ㅤㅤ✷ ࣭ ࣪ ˖ ☞ ࣭ ࣪ ᩠ ֗ ✦ ࣭ ࣪ ˖

No Pov

Recently you have became distance between your girlfriends .Why? 1. They had a big project . 2. You didn’t want to interrupt them no matter what was going on. And that was the problem . These cramps where dead ass killing you softly .Another reason why you didn’t bother telling them was because of your mood swings. Oh how they got tired of you and those mood swings .

Y/n’s Pov

Right now you where in your shared bedroom bored and dealing with cramps . You took a bunch of advil but the shit didn’t work.”alright cramps Yall not finna kick my ass”You chucking walking to get some chocolate. A random cramp came out of nowhere and hit you hard. I don’t want the smoke” You say holding your stomach. While with the other opening the fridge . “This Twix bar better work and these chips” You say grabbing the snacks before making your way back to the couch .

You where on the couch silently having pain .No matter how much chocolate and advil you took shit wasn’t working.You even tried google .You scroll looking at what they recommend. “Greens and salmon sounds like a nice out to eat meal sound like I’m finna go get some food “ . You exact the tab and open a new one to search “salmon places near me” you find the nearest location and it had 4.5 stars so it had to be good . You close your tab and get up from the bed. You get your keys and purse off the dresser. You make your way to the living room and put in your black converses .Once your shoes where on you where ready to go.

“Shuri Riri Ms Y/n has entered the lab” griot says as you walk in the doors seeing the 2 building. “Hey Babe “ Riri says looking you up and down. You wore a black shirt and black cargo. Even though you where in your period that didn’t stop your fashion to eat.

(Outfit idea imagine whatever)

“Is there something wrong with my outfit “ you question riri while shuri was stilling doing something. “Nah Just looking at how beautiful my baby is “ she says ending with a smile. “Well I’m going to order some food and I wanted to know what y’all would want .it’s a soul food place” You say realizing shuri still hasn’t even said a hi or wave. “I want ribs and Mac and cheese “ riri says getting back to work”.”I’ll take some catfish ,hush puppies and greens “ Shuri says as she looks at you showing a smile. “Alright see y’all “ you walk out annoyed but you were just happy .

Riri’s Pov

As you exit the lab I sense a mood change . “She definitely just had a mood swing” I say thinking about one thing this could mean. "She on her period" I say looking at shuri. "How do you know" she asks me while looking up."Greens help cramps the mood swings the distance " I say taping my finger in the table." I wonder why she didn't tell us " I question."well lets make it up to her somehow I'll buy her favorites before she comes back" I say getting my purse." Taking the day off? " shuri asks." hell yeah " I respond leaving the lab getting ready to go to a Walmart

Once I got back from the trip to the store I begin to set her basket up. When it came to y/n me and Shuri would often make a basket will all things she enjoyed. She always enjoyed the basket so we kept making them.”did y/n make it home yet “ I ask talking to shuri on the bracelet.”no she should be home in 10” Shuri says making it so I could finish it in time.

I finish the basket and I head back to the lab.Making the basket a somewhat suprise. "Ms Shuri and riri y/n has entered the lab" griot says. "Hey y'all I got the food" she says showing the bag." guess what” I ask her.”what” she questions as she places the food on the lab table . “we’re taking a day off " . “I love you guys so much”she says getting excited.”you guys wanna eat in the room ?” She asks . “Why not “ shuri says . We walk out of the lab making the way to our bedroom.

She opens the door to seeing the basket on the coffee table. “And what is this” she says getting close to the basket . She picks up the letter from the basket .”Dear my love, I haven’t been thinking about you and getting hints that you have started. To help with cramps I made you this basket with everything you love” . She reads the letter and ends walking up giving us both a big hug . “I love y’all but just know y’all shouldn’t have “ she says before letting us go.

Me shuri and y/n have been relaxing an enjoying the food. "Why didn't you want to tell us" shuri asks looking at y/n."Because of what happened last time"

*Flash Back Start*

"Don't talk to me" Y/n says as she hid under the covers. "What did I do" I ask confused. "You know what you did" she says peeping out of the cover. "What did I do" I still ask. "You bought me vegan chocolate" she says whining. "Sorry" I say sitting next to her on the bed . “Sorry dosent cut it and you looking good dosent help me being angry either “ she says getting sassy . “You lucky your on your period” I say with a slight smirk. “Ewww” She says getting back under the covers. “Hey I’m sorry fr fr “ I say whining back at her. “Yeah yeah “ she says as she gives me some cover . “Movie ?” I question her as I get under the cover . “Sure “ She says as she lays on my chest .

*Flashback end*

“Your sassy attitude was finna make it so you couldn’t walk for 3 days but other than that you should’ve told us” I say forming a laugh . “Y’all are right but my attitude that’s something I can’t stop doing gotta live with it tbh “ Y/n says with a chuckle. “Aye just make sure it’s in check when talking to me “ shuri says looking up . “Or what” y/n says smirking and getting closer . “You know what “ Shuri says leaning in talking in a whisper. “Woah there shuri she is on her period “I say stopping them . “ Your safe for now little y/n “ she says ending with a wink.

No Pov

For the rest of the night the three ladies spent time at home . The watched movies played music relaxed and flirt . The three ended the night falling asleep on one another on the couch watching princess and the frog .

Y/n enjoyed the small things they would do such as the basket and enjoyed the day with the 2.

#shuri #shuri fanfiction #black panther wakanda forvever spoilers #shuri udaku #queen shuri #princess shuri #daddy panther #shuriri #shuri x fanfic #shuriri y/n #shuriri x reader #shuri x riri

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rebelrebelwrites · 1 year ago

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Fic Friday! ❤️ Rebel’s Weekly Fic Recs

I'm back. 😊 A day and several weeks late, but I'm back. I've decided I'd like to keep doing these as much as I can. I hope anyone reading enjoys.

As always, this week’s recs are…

As always, please mind the tags on any recommended story for your own personal preferences.

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The Classic You’ve Heard Of But Somehow Haven’t Read Yet: About you, without you by @aylana-ryvain

What you need to know going in:

A lovely, sad, sweet one-shot written for Haladriel Week where Galadriel returns to Barad-dûr after Sauron’s defeat at the beginning of the Fourth Age. Once there, she discovers a treasure trove of trinkets crafted by The Dark Lord in the hopes that she would someday change her mind. 🥹 Another tragic instant-classic, this fic wrenches at your heart in the best way. Be ready to bookmark!

Complete, Teen

Read the story.

Follow the author on Tumblr and AO3.

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The AU You Need to Immerse Yourself In Because, Well, Wow: Someone Taught You Wrong, Kid by @klynnvakarian

What you need to know going in:

The Western AU I never knew I needed! The VIBES in this fic, I tell you—they’re strong, and pitch-perfect. Between the dialogue and the at first tentative, blink-and-you-might-miss-it moments between Hal and Gal, which then blossoms into something that's more matter-of-fact; a frank romance that feels so fitting for this world and time and space for the two of them… it’s lovely. You’ll be swept away the same as they are. Very excited to see the final piece of it!

WIP, Mature

Read the story.

Follow the author on Tumblr, Twitter and AO3.

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The Complete But Never Forgotten Masterpiece: The Nicest Parts of Hell by @myrsinemezzo

What you need to know going in:

Eru have mercy on my soul, my unprecedented foray into dark fic continues with this gripping, dare I say insidiously enticing fic—and, as always, I mean that in the best way possible. This story settles into your psyche; making you feel just as unhinged as the characters feel. You’re probably asking yourself why, so let me get to the heart of it: the story starts with Galadriel stumbling (practically literally) into Halbrand’s arms… Only problem is, he’s her brother Fin’s boyfriend. 👀 From there, she and Halbrand start a toxic, troubling affair that is impossible to stop reading. (Same goes for this story’s sequel, which is still in progress).

Complete, Explicit

Read the story.

Follow the author on Tumblr, Twitter and AO3.

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The WIP That Will Wreck You (In the Best Way): And In That Time, I Have Had Many Names by @the-manatee-hammer

What you need to know going in:

I’ve been meaning to share this fic for a long, long time, and I definitely should’ve done so sooner, so forgive me. Full disclosure: I found out about it from a friend who told me that I’d been mentioned in the notes, so again, forgive me for my slightly unbiased opinion. Regardless of how I came to it, I loved it as soon as I started reading! The story sees Halbrand still injured in the healing halls of Eregion—until Galadriel offers to help along the healing with something he’s never tried before. 👀🔥 Cue sexual healing! Spicy, intimate sexual healing, and I think the first time I encountered a virgin Sauron in fic. And hot damn, it’s hot. Unsurprisingly, Sauron is very eager to learn, and a very adept student. It’s been a while since this was updated, but still so worth checking out and subscribing to for it’s sensuality and supremely well done writing.

WIP, Explicit

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The Can’t Stop Consuming No Matter What Time It Is Fic: Stand by Me by @scriberated

What you need to know going in:

Lately I’ve been feeling some major burnout for many reasons, and for me, this fic was a balm at just the right moment! A sequel to this adorable one-shot, it’s an instantly delightful, fully-fledged romcom complete with roommates not-so-secretly pining after each other, fake dating, bed sharing, and that’s just within the first two chapters! 🤩 The premise: Hal and Gal are roommates, and after breaking up with her shitty, absent boyfriend Celeborn in the original one-shot, Hal takes care of Gal while she’s sick. This continuation sees Galadriel trying to navigate their growing closeness, finally agreeing to a trip together to visit Hal’s family—and from there, the romcom shenanigans ensue. This is another one where I can’t wait to see what comes next!

WIP, Mature

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🤩🤩🤩

Me at all these fics:

Don’t see your story on this list yet? Keyword: yet. Please don’t fret! I can only recommend so many each week, but I am always looking for more stuff to read, share, and generally shower with love, so please feel free to reply with your own fics or your pershaladronal faves. I have plenty more to recommend… ❤️

Until next week!

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alyszaen · 2 years ago

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~ "Circle Triangle Square" - changbin x chichi ~

embedding in time: march 2023 word count: 1.1k words summary: changbin needs to know why chichi has been closed off around him warnings: pure angst, swearing, yelling disclaimer: Chichi is an O/C invented by @chiskz who gave me explicit permission to create and post this. a/n: I recommend reading this first. You don't have to, but it makes everything make more sense

Part Two Part Three

Chichi radiated confidence. Her eyes looked like small crescent moons because of the wide grin she was giving Changbin. He sat across from her, seperated by the glass wall in the recording studio. "How did I do? I think this is it!", she was satisfied with the ad-lips she just sang into the microphone. They were recording them for their upcoming album. All of the other members were already done, but with her busy schedule for Troubl3mak3rs, some personal projects and life in general, the oldest only now got the time to record. And who better to create some ad-lips with than Seo "Yooooh" Changbin.

She took of the headphones she was wearing all throughout the process and put them in their designated space. When she looked at the rapper through the see-through wall, he seemed anything but happy. His hands were moving through his hair, pulling it back and out of his face. He seemed stressed, his eyebrows furrowed. "What's wrong, Binnie?" Ichi couldn't hear his sigh, but it was obvious that something was bothering him. Were her recordings not as good as she thought?

"Why are you being distant with me?", he didn't look angry at all, instead a hurt expression became clear through his glossy eyes. The girl knew what he was talking about, but she couldn't tell him that. There was no way she could explain why she stayed away from him, so she did the only thing she could think of in this moment; She lied. "What are you talking about?"

He stood up fast, pushing his chair back with so much strength that it got shoved into the dark couch behind him. It would definitely leave a mark on the leather, but that didn't matter to Changbin right now. What mattered, was to find out why his best friend was lying to him right now. "YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT!" The young mans eyes widened, he didn't mean to yell at her. He knew of her past and the damage it could do, but he was so afraid to loose her, almost intoxicated with that fear, that he lost control of the volume. She didn't even flinch, sure he would never hurt her. Yet he still apologized instantly - ashamed that he shouted at her.

Instead of panicking, Ichi grew furious. She walked towards the door seperating the recording room from all of the mixing-technology and opened it with all her strength. It didn't slam against the frame, because it was secured with rubber, but it still visualized her anger well.

"What the actual fuck, Changbin?" He visibly cringed at the name, not used to being called anything but loving nicknames by her. Tears built up in her eyes, but she didn't let them fall. She may trust him with her life, but showing weakness - which crying in front of the members felt like to her - was not something she took lightly. It was almost trivial. Of course they had all seen her with tears on her cheeks, but never like this. Never because she was the one causing someone else pain.

She stepped closer, now directly staring at the muscular man in front of her. "You know I care about you. I'd never want to hurt you. Ever...", towards the end of her sentence her voice grew quiet. Enormous amounts of guilt spread through her entire body. Hurting him was the last thing she wanted to do.

"Then why the hell have you been ignoring me? You say you don't want to hurt me...", before his voice could become more forceful he caught himself, not wanting to get too loud again. His next words were quiet, a mere whisper. Anyone observing would think he was saying something sweet or comforting. His voice was warm and almost soft, "But you have been the cause of most of my pain during the last weeks.", his voice broke, tears pooling in his eyes aswell, "I needed you! I needed my best friend to cheer me up, but she wasn't there...she was the reason why I needed cheering up in the first place."

Chichi couldn't practically feel her heart break into a million tiny pieces at his words. Her bottom lip quivered, her mouth drying up in an instant. Her chest felt heavy, but not in a comfortable way. Instead of feeling heavy with love, it felt heavy with pain. It was like someone filled her chest with thousands of stones and told her to keep moving. Every single breath felt like a burden on her body. She knew she couldn't keep it a secret anymore. It was eating her alive to be the cause of so much pain for him; To be the reason her best friends heart was aching. She was fighting with herself. The girl knew she owed him this honesty, but she was deadly afraid of what would happen once he knew. Ichi didn't think she would survive it if she lost him. Especially not like this.

This was the moment where Park Ichi let go of her restraints for the first time in years. She released all the built up emotions, all the fear and pain and anger that she stored in her body for so long. And with that release she also rid herself of the control for them. Ichi let the tears roll down her cheeks a while ago, her pupils widened in stress. "You want to know, why I've been ignoring you, huh, Changbin?", she took one last step closer, pointing her finger at his chest. With every word she said she got louder and louder. "I was ignoring you, because I can't be close to you anymore. I want to cry because I can't touch you. My heart aches because I just want you to tell me THAT EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE FINE, BUT IT WON'T BE!", she was yelling now. Enraged by her own emotions. "I'M IN MOTHERFUCKING LOVE WITH YOU, YOU ABSOLUTE FUCKING IDIOT!"

Chichis eyes widened in shock. She unconsiously threw her hands over her mouth. The tears she was releasing were not from anger or sadness anymore. They were filled with regret. She could never take this back. This would change everything. She probably just destroyed her most dear friendship and there was no way to change that.

And the only thing Changbin did was stare at her...

Taglist: @longingpurity @hyujinnie1 @sensitiveandhungry @minvho @hee0soo @minnnie-binnie @zoe8stay @l3visbby @bbyquokka @imafivestarkpopstan @mxnsxngie @serenitysoda200 @lino-jagiyaa @notastraykid Feel free to let me know if you'd like to be added to the taglist!

#stray kids #skz #drabble #skz drabbles #skz oneshots #skz imagines #stray kids oc #skz oc #oc #kpop addition #stray kids 9th member #kpop added member #alysdrabbles #chiskz #changbin #changbin angst #skz angst #seo changbin

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dots-and-loops · 2 years ago

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hello so apparently you can pin posts so I will use this power the best way i can, best hyperpop albums !!

warning: leftist wall of text about music, enjoy reading c:

fishmonger is a must no matter what you listen to, best hyperpop album out there. so much different genre mixings, so many creative ideas, so much oomfh in a single god damn album while still sounding really good. there is no bad song in this album yet there is so many elements from different genres. listen to it! its good really good it has alt/indie rock elements to it :D

jane remover is an artist who boggles my mind because the fella wasnt even 18 when she created the album that has shaped the hyperpop realm since the day it was posted, having effects to the genre to this day. album influenced the genre and i am sure of it! while some of the songs were removed from the album it is insanely fun and unique 4 songs to listen to.

apparently white tiger is digicore but it’s basically the same genre. smooth album, taking inspiration from others while still keeping it fresh and original with various cool and unique ideas. executed well and the songs transition very well, never felt like the song was forced into the album. definitely listen, this more experimental one. while the last 2 were more mainstream in the genre (that means if you listen to hyperpop you know these albums) this one not so much, but the internet sweaty nerds who listen to sematary and dg love 2hollis for some reason

sidenote: 2hollis’ new album “2” goes also extremely hard so listen to that too, even tho its more electropop

sidesidenote: i am pulling these genres from rym i dont differentiate the genres that much.

while frost children’s album “spiral” i didnt enjoy that much this one i enjoyed a lot. definite improvement can be seen. up there with fishmonger as one of the best imo, the beats of this song are impeccable. the lyrics are a point where they can improve but MAN, i can let that slide with the beats. they go hard. transitions between songs are also insanely well executed and make me tingle every time c:

very fun album, consistently high energy from start all the way till the end. all 3 six impala’s songs are very very good. hell, earwax imo is even better than wflytd. but this i would recommend listening to more, because this has everything and it has the everything in extreme quantities. have fun fucks

bit of a wild pick, since twikipedia previously made pretty generic hyperpop, but this album for some weird reason stuck to me. yeah the lyrics can be a bit lacking at some points and not all the features were,,, good. but something about this album is just, good. the beats are solid and unique even when inspired and i dont care about the lyrics when your singing voice is as good as theirs. the singing just somehow fits the music so well. it’s not what i have is so god damn underrated its borderline criminal, the song goes HARD. the buildup, delivery and the ending are just amazing. might be a bit different from previous albums but it’s a good listen. mark my words, in a few years time twiki will make an album up there with the best. but rn imo twiki needs more experience, few more albums and they are golden

honorable mention: food house - food house, SUMMER03 - midwxst, cypress grove - glaive.

sidesidesidenote: you have listened to (or at least have heard of) 100 gecs, i dont feel the need to add them here since the its pretty self explanatory. i will say that 1000 gecs was ass and 10000 gecs was miles better. sue me.

thats it, if i missed a good album then reblog or add a # or smth idfk i came here from reddit. soryy for broken english at some parts, i can use fancy dancy words all i want but english is not my first language and sentences can be confusing and broken sometimes :p. if you reached this far, first of all why and thanks for bearing my infodump, i like the silly beats music. i dont even care if you actually listen to them or not i just like talking about the albums :)

september 2023 update: frailty jane remover was an album i completely missed lmao ! listen to that too :D

after making this list i got informed about the artist duo black dresses, they are slaying hard their music bangs.

some more good albums/ep’s: recovery girl, despite everything it’s still user, I know theres something left for you

october 2023 update: listen to wallsocket listen to wallsocket listen to wallsocket listen to wallsocket listen to wallsocket

#hyperpop #digicore #glitchcore #music #Spotify

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centrally-unplanned · 2 years ago

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I feel like making a “Top 5 Media of the Year” post is like extremely redundant if you follow me, its going to be really obvious what is on there. Still, ranking things is fun and is good to reflect on them, in particular why they ‘stuck’ with me and what makes them last as opposed to fun-at-the-time so here goes:

Perfect Tides

Definitely the most well-crafted ‘narrative’ of the year for me. As a game its eh, but you essentially ignore that and its very easy to do so. I been ruminating a lot on temporality this year; the sort of stripping-away of the idea of one having a future that ones grows to as opposed to a sequential present. The idea of ‘growth’ being more of a story we write for ourselves. And additionally I have always had a passion for stories about contingency and specificity, the ways technology, locale and circumstances shape people in not-so-obvious ways.

Perfect Tides is never settled on one thing but those two themes permeate every part of its narrative. Mara is obsessed with changing herself, getting out of the ‘rut’ of her life, but has almost no agency in that regard. She changes, massively so, but never due to her plans coming to fruition. There are these moments where she introspects, and she is smart so it seems right, but - while never confirmed to be so explicitly - are just wrong on reflection, in the battle between her identity & and her outside reality, reality proves stronger.

And the ways she tries to fight against her circumstances are so adorably 2000′s. Writing on fanfic webforums, ‘dating’ someone via IM (and it falling apart from it being transposed outside of that medium), living on an outskirt suburbia island to the metropole of the rest of your social circle, there is so much in there. In the end the bildungsroman story of a teen growing up is dime a dozen, these stories can’t survive on the universality. Perfect Tides marries the universality to a specificity that changes it enough to make it new.

Bocchi the Rock

I have said a lot about Bocchi and why it works so I won’t repeat myself on that front. Instead to situate its lasting impact on me I think I can instead focus on the kind of anime I have been watching. I have picked up a lot (by no means all) of the older ‘classics’ over the past 5 or so years, and I was absolutely soul-sniped by the 90′s ~mindfuck~ era of anime. I am always secretly hunting for more of that, but you really aren’t going to find any of that in modern shows; Sonny Boy is the closest I have seen and its a forced comparion for sure (still a great show, would recommend). The Evangelion era is so over not even an Evangelion remake could recapture it.

The modern era instead has other strengths that you need to see on its own terms - new themes, new styles, new approaches. Slice of life is one of them, K-On! was the first ‘great’ entry into the genre that utilizes the modern lexicon, and there have been more and more hits along that front over time. Anime - and the people who watch it - has a more comfortable relationship with its otaku identity, replacing existential dilemma with celebratory depiction. 90′s animation experimentalism was immense but also limited by the tools of the day; modern animation technology allows an easy integration of styles and techniques that was out or reach 20 years ago.

Bocchi for me is the crest of a wave of modern trendlines in anime’s capabilities and thematics. It perfects so much of what slice of life does while shedding its tired tropes; ruthlessly depicts a real-if-exaggerated otaku struggle but through the modern comedic, happy lens; and puts animation-as-a-tool to work communicating those feelings in the most inventive ways posible. Hell, the design process itself is radically accessible! I follow the creative team on twitter who were live-posting production photos, scene reactions, everything you could imagine. The media mix was intense. It is, in a certain sense, the most modern anime I have seen. It crystalized its own ‘genre’ that I want to see more of.

Sing Yesterday For Me

This year was a big year for manga for me, a journey I am hoping to deepen going forward. Sing Yesterday For Me was on my list for a while due to the anime adaptation from 2020, which I...hated? But due to all the really polished balls it kept dropping, I could see the potential, moody characters struggling with love & life in period-piece 2000′s Tokyo, lots of my boxes checked there.

The manga drops many of these same balls (less for sure), this is not a ‘great’ work. Instead why it has stuck with me is that is a showcase in the strengths of aesthetics & realism. Kei Toume’s art is just so absolutely my jam; the way she draws eyes with enhanced roundness and detail; the way the hair is all messy textures and sharp lines; the fact that in the middle of this serious manga will be splash images of little fashion showcases or photobooth printouts or something. She does this in all of her works too, she has types - I have been reading two of her other manga, Rocky Princess and Karakida-ke no Koshogurashi, and her aesthetic archetypes absolutely show up again in both.

I enjoyed Sing Yesterday for Me’s story but what I remember most are these individual panels that are just Art to me, and its something that manga does on its own terms that I have been growing to appreciate more and more as I read more and more (Chainsaw Man stands out in this regard as well). Its a reason to read manga specifically as its own genre. Maybe the story won’t be amazing, but it can be in service of those panels, a necessary component to making them shine, and its worth it for that.

Astrophyics - Hope Left Me+

Astroyphics is a synthwave/darkwave composer who got their start doing remixes, lots of anime & 80′s stuff, which all rocks and I highly recommend. This is the year they started branching out into their own original compositions in a way that I think succeeded - it was a rougher journey, some of their early works lack life, but the later stuff - Hope Left Me, Cute Tragedies - are some of my favourite of the genre in how they blend being ‘noisescape’ with having melodic elements or motiffs that still stand out.

And they are a media mix pioneer in how much work they put into video elements for the songs, album covers, and other things - Hope Left Me has a visual novel it is attached to! Which you can play as a standalone game (this worked ~fine) or partly experience as a visual album for listening to the music (which is amazing). I love that someone who started out making Serial Experiments Lain covers is working so well in the medium of “music as its permitted to be by the internet”. Its something I want more and more over time, music that exists beyond the notes and instead is in conversation with the rest of the media apparatus it is so inexorably embedded in, and Astrophysics owns that reality. They are 50% of the reason I am a Hatsune Miku stan nowadays (first t-shirt recently acquired!) - the other 50% of the reason being...

Hazel - Why Did We Like Elfen Lied?

Hazel’s Why Did We Like Elfen Lied? lives rent-free in my mind. Its the perfect question for me, not about ‘anime as anime’ but ‘anime as societal product’, about how watchers viewed it, cared about it, repackaged it, communicated it, the works. “What does this piece of media being loved say about those who love it” is the root question over which every other media discussion I ever have rests, the Unified Field Theorem of media analysis. And Elfen Lied is the *perfect* target for this question - it fucking sucks! It is an awful show, and in Japan no one cared. But in 2004 everyone in the west loved it. It was a show begging for an explanation.

Hazel nails it, and she does so through her subjectivity. She was the patient zero for the Elfen Lied experience as an emo goth edgy teen girl for its release; the way she jumps back and forth between the anime’s actual content, the way what it offered was passed around anime & goth subcultures, and the wider concerns those communities had in 2000′s America, is completely realized due to its combination of analysis and autobiography. And Hazel excels as a filmmaker along this same lens - her editing style is a tower of niche references to iconography, media, and music from the era, she composes her own songs which she uses for key moments, its a “by kids for kids by scene nerds for scene nerds” approach that epotimizes the strength of YouTube as a medium.

Hazel will not continue to be my favourite YouTuber - I will absolutely still be a fan, but she has her own questions she cares about that don’t align with mine, and the way she is evolving as a creator is not my own path. She has many other good videos and I highly recommend looking through all her works. But Why Did We Like Elfen Lied will last beyond that for me as an influence of the kind of thing I myself want to make (and probably never will, oh well!).

#2022 media retrospective #bocchi the rock!#perfect tides #sing yesterday for me #astrophysics #hazel

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