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Even leaving aside the obvious ship bait here, this is one of the best examples of character comedy Hoyo has posted in a long time.
The fact that Jade sends Aventurine a bunch of rocks just knowing that his incredible luck will allow him to suss out, without even cutting the stones, exactly which ones are worth processing is funny as hell.
The fact that Aventurine is actually able to answer and picks out the rocks that contain high value jade without hesitation is absolutely hilarious.
Bro is out here using his blessing from a goddess to play blind-box prize games. This is like finding out X-Men's Professor X uses his telepathy to order pizza.
Do you think people ever call Aventurine like "Hey man, is my new relationship going to work out?"
And Aventurine's just over here as the divination champion of Pier Point going "Signs point to no, friend. The vibes are just rancid. Abandon ship ASAP."
And then he trips over his catcake and eats shit because he didn't see it coming.
#honkai star rail#aventurine#this was so off the cuff and funny#the fact that this was the only post Sparkle liked too lolol#I love the 'superpower used for completely mundane purposes' trope#If Aventurine is this conscious of his power#I just can't help but imagine all the other weird ways he's applying his luck to life#“Don't buy that salad; I can FEEL the listeria from here”#and okay#since everyone else is talking about it#ratiorine#very strong with this marketing#Ratio commenting on no one else's posts BUT Aventurine's#is so cute#the fact that he ONLY likes posts after Aventurine has liked them#implies that he's only seeing them on his feed through Aventurine's likes#Hoyo knows what they're doing
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A Man has Needs part 1
This will hopefully be a short thing, maybe three or four parts. Silly with a small dash of angst for flavor. Also someone needs to stop me from starting new stories, instead of indulging my insanity.
Ship: Dead on Main (Jason/Danny)
It had been an exhausting Friday, people were out celebrating the weekend and payday both. To top it off it was prime petty crime weather too with no rain. It was a patrol that would never end. Crime Alley had really lived up to its name tonight.
Jason was exhausted. Not because anything had been particularly challenging or dangerous, but it had just been one very long night of constant stupid little crimes.
It was five in the morning and his bed was calling him. He’d already stashed his gear in storage on the roof and he was so close to being home he could practically feel the soft sheets, the promise of sleep. The open bathroom window was a bother when he was this tired. Maybe he should have just gone down to the street and walked in the door, but keys also seemed like such a bother right now and more stairs… No, window was fine, he was in.
Bed. Now.
He bumped into something outside the bathroom door. Fuzzily he looked down to see a moving box - odd. He yawned and rubbed his eyes, he’d deal with that in the morning. Bed, comfort, safe.
He stumbled into the bedroom when it turned out the door wasn’t properly shut just pushed mostly closed.
Okay check list. Boots off. What else? Pants off, shirt off. He’d pick up in the morning. Did he forget anything? Toothbrush. He glanced backwards halfheartedly, he’d already left the bathroom; bed was right there.
The bed won. Tomorrow he would deal with teeth.
Tomorrow…
He crawled under the sheets. Warm and nice and safe and mmmmh he snuggled closer to the source, breathing in mint and something biting like frosty morning air. His nose buried into soft short hair and breathed in deep again. Good. Amazing. Safe. Sated.
Sleep.
Oo o oO
Danny turned and stretched with a yawn. He frowned when something held him into place. Must have gotten himself caught in the sheets again. It wasn’t a problem, he just slipped away intangibly, rolling to the edge of the bed to reach blindly for the night table.
Where was the phone? It took him a moment but finally it connected with his hand.
He groaned when he saw the time, it was nearly midday. Jazz would frown at him for already messing his sleep schedule up, but he’d just wanted to get as much set up in his apartment as possible, that had to be an okay excuse? He turned back on his back and looked at the light dancing across the ceiling from the light breeze moving the curtains. Okay time to get up. He had another day of unpacking today.
He got out and stretched absently. He turned around intending to make his bed if only to look responsible for when Jazz would come later to see the apartment.
He turned and promptly clapped his hands over his mouth to contain the frightened scream.
There was a guy in his bed! How was there a guy in his bed?! Ancients, what the fuck?!
Wait.
Danny tilted his head, eyes trailed down the muscular and scarred back, to a well shaped butt, which the tight boxers did very little to hide, and then those thighs!
There was a hot guy in Danny’s bed!
Focus Danny. He shook his head and slapped himself for good measure. That wasn’t what was important right now - though those thighs… Ancients, Danny would happily die again crushed by them.
No!
What was important was somehow there was a (hot) stranger in his bed. Danny had not invited him, of that he was sure. He had been unpacking yesterday, there had been no consumption of ghost zone alcohol yesterday, which could otherwise explain the lack of memory.
Which meant the guy had for some reason entered Danny’s apartment and slept with him - in the boring ordinary sense, Danny lamented this fact quietly for a moment.
Danny wasn’t surprised he hadn’t woken up, he slept, well, like the dead. The only thing that would wake him was very loud noises (like his alarm or his Dad’s inside voice) or occasionally his ghost sense.
It wasn’t even that Danny was surprised to find a bedmate. It was rare that Danny slept alone these days. He was, no matter how you put it, a very powerful ghost and he gave off a lot of good concentrated ambient ectoplasm.
Sometime last year the blobs and animal ghosts in Amity had started to join him every now and then when he slept. According to Frostbite it wasn’t so strange. They fed on the energy he gave off and also benefitted from his presence, which apparently radiated safety.
At first he’d been woken up by his ghost sense every time, but he’d gotten to a point where he just subconsciously dismissed the sense when the ghosts in question didn’t have ill intentions.
So Danny wasn’t surprised he wasn’t alone. He’d expected a bit more time to pass before whatever weak ghosts might be around figured out he was here, but you don’t wake up six days out of seven with cuddly animal ghosts in your bed and get surprised by it.
No, Danny was surprised by the fact that it was a guy. A human. A person. With muscled arms and- Oh, Danny realized cheeks heating up, that probably hadn’t been the sheets he’d been stuck in earlier.
Danny covered his face with his hands and groaned in despair.
Why was there a guy in his bed? Why couldn’t there be a guy in his bed for normal reasons? Danny would have brought this guy to his bed for normal bringing a guy to bed reasons.
He crawled onto the bed intending to wake the stranger, but as he reached out for the guy’s shoulder he turned leaning into the touch and sighed like the weight of the world had just lifted off his shoulders.
Danny was frozen, staring at the point of contact. He could sense it now: the man’s malnourished ghost core.
Danny swallowed thickly, suddenly seeing the many scars on the man’s back in a different light and that pure white streak in the otherwise black hair, it all seemed so obvious now.
The man was a halfa, or halfa adjacent. Because that was definitely warm human flesh underneath Danny’s hand.
So incredibly, unbelievably, absurdly this was essentially the same situation as usual, except not at all, because this was a person. Humanoid ghosts and ghosts with human-like or above intelligence didn’t do this. There were social conventions in place and not to mention they were usually powerful enough on their own to not need the ectoplasm.
But this guy was malnourished. He probably never had a good stable source of ectoplasm to properly develop his metabolism. Also to Danny’s metaphysical senses he smelled like he’d done the ghostly equivalent of dumpster diving to survive. Danny’s ectoplasmic aura had to be like the siren call of a buffet table.
Shit.
New plan. Danny was not gonna embarrass the poor guy. The situation was weird enough as it was. Danny was just gonna act like this was normal. Danny woke up with guests practically every day.
This was a person, not an animal, therefore petting was out of the question, so coffee.
Coffee was normal to offer guests. Also Danny needed coffee. He nodded to himself in satisfaction and floated off the bed to enter his combined kitchen and living room. The coffee machine was the first thing he got set up yesterday, clearly smart of past Danny.
It wouldn’t be long before his guest awoke with Danny no longer in the room to supply passive ectoplasm.
Maybe his human stomach wanted food too?
Oo o oO
Jason woke up with his head and nose buried in a pillow that smelled wonderful and comfortable somehow. He breathed in deep, catching mint and that biting cold he vaguely remembered from last night. Now, however he wasn’t dead on his feet, he was awake, more rested than he remember feeling for a long time and his brain connected the details into very alarming facts:
This was not his pillow. This was not his bed.
He sat up, quickly taking in the bare white walls and the stack of emptied and flattened moving boxes leaning against the wall next to a built-in closet.
This was very much not his apartment.
There was a noise of a cupboard clanging shut and Jason’s head snapped to the door that was open just a crack; he was not alone.
Shit.
He jumped out of bed, bending his knees upon impact to soften the sound. He needed to leave. Where was his clothes? His gaze darted around and he hurried to pick up his discarded items of clothing as he found them. Somehow one of his boots had ended up under the bed.
Quickly he pulled on the jeans and the shirt, was he wearing a jacket yesterday? He didn’t remember. Boots on and then he was going out the window- except there was the scent of coffee and something in the air. What was that smell?
He found himself moving to the door instead. The door squeaked as he pulled it open and he froze, hand still on the door handle, when the sound drew the attention of the young man in the kitchen.
His hair was black and sleep tousled, he had a slender athletic build and as he walked around the kitchen island bearing two cups it became apparent he was just wearing boxers. Jason’s inspection ended on his legs, which were admittedly very nice. When he looked back up he found the man standing a cautious distance away and a cute pink blush stretched all the way from his cheeks to his chest. Sky blue eyes looked up a him from underneath slightly frowning brows.
“So, you’re awake,” the man opened with an admirable attempt at a smile considering the situation. There was a beat of silence in which Jason grasped for what to even say, then the man reached his hand forward offering one of the cups, “coffee?”
There were many a thing Jason could say or should say. Like, what the fuck? You’re just gonna offer the guy who broke into your apartment coffee? Or, I’m sorry I broke into your apartment (and bed!)? And, why do you sleep with your windows open and unlocked? This is freaking Crime Alley! Or, what is it that smells so good?
What he actually said was a quiet, “yes, please.”
The cup was warm in his hands as he sipped it. And clearly this was enough for the cute guy because his smile turned more real and he nodded to himself and walked back to the kitchen counter. Jason really hoped that didn’t mean the coffee was poisoned.
“Feel free to take a seat. I hope you like pop tarts, it’s kinda all that I have at the moment.” As if summoned the toaster made a swish noise popping up the tarts. Hesitantly Jason sat down at the small square table paired with two mismatched foldable chairs. He really should turn and jump out a window. There had to be some kind of reckoning coming. Maybe the guy really cared about hospitality and Jason would be questioned after the food? Maybe that’s what was going on.
But also strangely his gut was telling him he was safe here? He really had no clue what to do with that.A paper plate with a pop tart was set down in front of him and after setting down his own pop tart and coffee the man joined him.
Jason was supremely aware of the few inches between their knees. This wasn’t a large table after all and if he moved just slightly they would be touching. But why would he want them to be touching? Why was it so tempting?
Jason clenched his hands firmly and stared down at the pop tart, with an intensity born of the fact that for some reason he had to focus on not knocking knees with a stranger.
“You look at that poor pop tart as if you think it’s gonna explode, that’s not actually what pop tart means, you know.”
Jason looked up at the guy in disbelief.
He rubbed the back of his neck, “yeah that was terrible I know.”
Silence stretched between them and clearly embarrassed the guy hastily took a sip of his coffee and a bite of his pop tart avoiding Jason’s gaze.
Guilt twisted in Jason’s chest, not only did he invade his home he was also making him uncomfortable. His only comfort was the fact that the guy clearly wasn’t afraid of him.
Jason started eating the pop tart. For whatever the reason breakfast was part of the script the guy had decided on to make an attempt at normalcy. What else was Jason to do? He hadn’t fled when he had the chance and-
Oh-
The guy had shifted in his chair, one of their knees were touching, there was a spark and it felt like something uncurled inside him, a weight lifted. Jason blinked. This was…Mint and frost was a sting in his nose, a fullness in his chest. Goose bumps ran along his arms, and it tingled all the way to his fingertips.
Jason snapped his head up, but the guy was just looking at his phone sipping his coffee. As if he couldn’t feel the cold electricity between them. There was no way he could sit like that if he felt it? Was Jason just imagining it? He shuddered and moved slightly, just enough that they weren’t touching and instantly he regretted it. The wave of longing was almost enough to make his vision black out.
The guy looked up with a frown. “You okay, man?”
“Fine,” Jason said hoarsely, desperately focusing on the half eaten pop tart and taking another bite.
When the pop tarts were eaten and the cups emptied the man stood and Jason matched him. Jason wasn’t sure what he expected to happen at this point but it certainly wasn’t the guy, to walk over to his front door with a casual, “well I should get ready for the day.”It was a clear dismissal. An out for the whole strange situation. Jason stood up and walked over to the door.
The guy opened the door letting Jason out with a short electrifying clap on the back and a “Take care, man.”
Jason was left standing outside the door to the previously empty apartment 4A, several floors below Jason’s own top floor apartment. How did he ever mistake it for his own?
What was the deal with the guy’s touch and why did Jason crave it so desperately?
Unsettled. he started walking towards the stairwell. As he moved further away from the apartment the pull to go back lessened. It was still there, but it was replaced quickly by something else.
He felt rested, energized in a way he hadn’t felt in a long while. There was an urge to do something. He felt like he could take on the world - maybe even Sunday dinner at the manor tomorrow.
Jason laughed. Wouldn’t that surprise everyone?
He was so caught up in the euphoria of productivity and social interactions that didn’t go sour for the next couple of days, that he completely forgot about the strange Saturday morning.
-
If you liked this consider telling me your thoughts in the replies or tags, it is motivating. Now to hopefully write a bit on Catnip. Edit: Masterpost now up if you wanna subscribe
#dp x dc#dead on main#a man has needs#Danny is trying his best to pretend this is normal#and okay#Jason has no clue whatsoever.
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fav bojance pics?? 👀
✨️ Heho
That is such a good question, and it took me a long, long time to dive into my folders and find the pics I like the most! It's actually very hard finding pictures with just the three of them, but I still have a few pics I do really like! I'll give you a small little selection, but since tumblr limits me to ten, it was actually very hard to decide.
Let's start with the London live streams, or also the JO cooking shows, which are basically domestic BoJance living together. There are so many good screenshots of them, where they are silly or mostly looking confused af while reading the chat 😂
While talking about livestream, their other insta live (or rather, the failed discord live) was also more than amusing and brought us this gem :3
I think those three are the most random ones I could find and they don't have any particular reason behind why I chose them other that I love how chaotic they look!
I could never not choose this picture. I honestly have no clue what the hell Bojan wanted to accomplish by that, but he managed to make it look super hot.
And damn, Nace looks way too intrigued by them.
This might be my fav picture of them. Ever. Period.
They are just so very soft, and Jan and Nace are looking at each other while Bojan is wrapped in Nace's jacket like a little kitten? Not forgetting to talk about how damn big Nace's hands are, making Bojan look so damn tiny djjsjsnssjsnd 👀
And as a lil extra, have the three boyfriends looking at each other! ✨️💜🩷❤️
I know you probably didn't expect me to write about the pics a well, but every time I get to talk about the three of them together is a very good time! ✨️
#I love the three of them#they are just so adorable and comfy looking together#they also complement each other perfectly and just fit so very very good#the three boyfriends :3#is this my bojance brainrot? yes maybe probably#but its true#and okay#BoJance#bojance my beloved#joker out#bojan cvjetićanin#nace jordan#jan peteh#jan je bog#happy puppy#big juicy
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I think I’m going to cry
#ao3#ao3 writer#ao3 comments#no joke#I got teary eyed#it’s just so sweet#and it made my whole week#sometimes I feel like my end notes are a bit much#and I ramble#but I like taking y’all through my experience when writing#like my thoughts#or my original idea that might have changed#I love being able to share that#and I know some don’t read it#just keep scrolling#which is fine#and okay#no hard feelings#but to know that there are some that like my end notes#makes me happy
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New hc
juno named him like that bc he was an insult to her for being born
#Beetlejuice#Beetlejuice musical#lawrence betelgeuse shoggoth#Idk how to tag this#So basically me and a friend went on a rant#And okay#Would YOU want to be called a Lawrence???#Cause personally I'd be offended#Shoggoth sounds like an insult but that's just his last name it's hereditary#And honestly beetlejuice is giving elementary school quick draw insult gone wrong#Like “you smell like beetle...juice! Cause beetles stink when you stomp on em!”#Idk it's just giving that#No wonder he goes by his middle name#I wouldn't want to be named Lawrence either
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me when i am neuvillette, chief iudex of fontaine, one of the seven dragon sovereigns, decreer of the deep (i am sad and it’s raining out)
#genshin#genshin impact#fontaine#neuvillette#hydro dragon#don’t cry#im totally fine#and okay#idk what you mean#meme
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Happy Lee Know Day!
Happy 25th Birthday, Minho! Thank you for sharing yourself, and your art, so fearlessly. You inspire us! So glad to share the planet with your can’t wait to see what the next year brings. 💜
#happy lee know day!#happy birthday Lee know#lee minho#stray kids#stray kids fanart#my art#digital artwork#I posted this much earlier in his day#but it got eaten by tumblr 💀#he’s so damn beautiful#I honestly slept on Lee know for like a YEAR#and it was a mistake#and okay#Lee minho and Wang YiBo have very similar energy#both are unapologetically rainbow#both are savage as fuck#both are lead dancers#both are funny as hell
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Anyway, speaking of the Doctor Who TTRPG, I am once again reminded how pathetic the Eighth Doctor sourcebook is
#they really decided to sell it for the same price as the other sourcebooks even though it must have less than half of the content#and okay#i get that they were never going to put in all the novels and comics and audios because then that sets a precedent for the other Doctors#but surely it's not too hard to just make some statblocks for the main companions#or sell it at a discounted price???#i actually prefer the 60 years of adventure book to the Eighth Doctor sourcebook and it's not even about him 😭#anyway i should probably get round to rewriting the Eighth Doctor sourcebook at some point#doctor who#doctor who rpg#eighth doctor#shed talks
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Don't touch me.
#And okay#I guess that was enough emotion for one day#I can be done now#Happy New Year#Happy New Year 2014#Chandramohan 'Charlie' Sharma#Nandu Bhide#Pix's pics
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13 days until day of the jackal comes out not that im counting or anything
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I will annihilate.
FEARR ME!!!
the cheeto dust annon
Please. Stop shouting.
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MORE ALEX BRAINROT PLS LOVED THE NEW FIC 💞
aww tysm!! <33
i'm working on smth new rn (as a lil apology for literally disappearing 😭) so expect something sometime soon, i guess!!
#and guess what#it's sias al#so shocking#i know#unexpected from me#also lil personal update#i've not been thriving lately#but i'm back#and okay#cookie chat#anon
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what "horror after the show"?
I don't know how to answer, this horror could only be experienced! 😆many people enjoyed the rehearsal and I can only speak for myself and my friends :) we were horrified by what we saw (on videos), richard looked very upset, he was ignoring everyone on stage.. it's hard to describe. but my friends and i were horrified. after last mexico where they were all so happy and cheerful, to see this indifference was horrible..
#people told me I'm exaggerating#🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️🤷🏻♀️#i was really looking forward to the start of the tour!#i was looking to seeing their happy faces and new kisses#but I saw a super sad richard#and they removed auslander outro#and it shocked me and my friends and it's definitely not what we were expecting#and okay#fuck the kissing#I'd be happy if they were just playing together#but they weren't#and I was very#very sad about it#feel free to think that im crazy i know#😆😆😆#and then this thing with Till happened and it got worse
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I’m ALMOST done with my long sword-main run of Dark Souls 3. 😤 All I have left are Haflight, Midir and Gael!! It’s been tough, but very rewarding. The Nameless King has, so far, been the fight to take me the most attempts.
#and okay#I used Storm Ruler against Yhorm but who ACTUALLY fights Yhorm??#he doesn’t count#dark souls
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FinalFirstBurst from ao3 if your still out there.... I miss you 🥺
#breadbear speaks#they deleted#their account and their fics with them#i hope they are happy#and okay#with whatever they are doing with their life now
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