#and ohhh i would feel so guilty about making him do all the work. especially because at the time we were discussing this he was an active dm

[littlegoldfinchh]

Yo, so, I was talking with one of my friends, and apparently she and her husband do a one on one DnD campaign thing together? Where they both have a good handful of characters and they pretty much play together with them using some of the DnD (and a bit of homebrew), and they apparently have a blast. Dunno if you and your bf have tried or thought about doing so, but might be worth a shot if you have been jonesing to play. :o

Ohhhh im so jealous of them dhhd like that sounds so fun!! I am kinda curious about the logistics tho, are they both dming together or only one of them does? I would feel bad for putting all the work on him so co-dming would be the best i guess? But i have zero clue how to do that

But aww your friends sound so adorable and im sure it's insanely fun to just have a one on one dnd session with your partner like fbdnjssn ngl i've been daydreaming about it a lot

[meow-xine]

Ohhh I am so obsessed with him 😫

Shota Aizawa x Fem reader

Cw: smut, some plot… oral (F! receiving)

Background: Aizawa is your husband but you haven’t seen him in WEEKS due to him being caught up in work.

Shota has just been so busy as of late. Truth be told, with the two of you sharing so many aspectual responsibilities – many stemming from Shota’s job, you had felt a strain on your relationship. Shota rarely had time for you anymore, him spending more time now than ever at work, trying to make sense of villain attacks and dorms. Sometimes he would be gone for weeks, the only interaction being a text or a late night call. Of course you kept yourself busy, going to work during the day then occupying yourself with small things around the house; cleaning, crafts. No matter how much you distracted yourself though, there was no way to stop the yearning for your husband. You knew it was necessary, and you would in no way ever try to stop him from doing what he needed to, but you just wish he could take one day off. Life just hadn’t been the same.

“I just miss you so much.” you sobbed into the phone resting next to you, laying down curled over a pillow. This had become a sort of routine, Shota calling you up later than he should, knowing that you would be awake and expecting to hear from him. “I know, I miss you too. It’s.. it’s just been so complicated trying to balance everything. Know that if I could come home to you I would.” He sighed. It wasn’t much easier on him, and you knew that. You often found yourself getting off the phone feeling more guilty than anything. He had a lot on his plate, and you were sure your complaining wasn’t of much help. There was just something about the late night that seeped into your words, taking control and slurring your speech. You weren’t used to staying up so late.

“I’m sorry baby.. I just don’t feel good without you here. It’s too quiet and dull.” you continued your earlier recurring thought. Silence interrupted by your small hiccups filled the air. It was stagnant and dense, but not uncomfortable. “You know it breaks my heart to hear you like that honey.” He interrupted the silence, followed by a sigh. “I’ll do what I can to see you as soon as possible.” he continued. “You promise?” “I promise. Now get some sleep love, it’s late.” And with that you hung up and fell asleep, remaining in the same curled position. 

That was two weeks ago, and since then you had been carefully watching the news reports and attacks against both Shota and his students. It was scary stuff and you constantly had to remind yourself that he would be okay– that they would all be okay. Even with reminders though, you couldn’t help but feel anxious and out of control, sometimes forgetting to breathe until Shota got a break on TV. You followed up with texts and phone calls afterwards too, needing more than just a digital image showing he was safe. 

Finally, amongst the sea of phone calls you had gotten, it was your husband.

“[Name]? Baby?” it was Shota, he sounded happier than he had in a while and you swore you could feel his smile through the phone. “Hi Sho, I’m here. How are things going?” you smiled too, not being able to contain yourself after hearing him. “That’s actually what I wanted to talk to you about. Things are going good, especially today. I rarely ever take time off work so it was pointed out that I am long overdue for some PTO.” “Oh yay! Do you know when exactly you might be getting some days?” You stood up from the couch you were sitting on in your shared home. “Well…” He started, but before he could finish his sentence the doorbell rang. “Oh, I’m sorry, give me one moment, someone’s at the door..” He chuckled, “Sure.”

You made your way to the door making sure to hold your phone to your chest before answering. Upon opening the door, the phone in your hand was long forgotten, falling to the floor. It was Shota on the other side, lazily holding his phone to his ear. He hung up and opened his arms, allowing you to run into them.

“You’re here! Oh I’ve missed you so much.. I wish you would have told me you were coming ,I would have worn something nicer.” You rambled feeling embarrassed for just wearing one of his shirts and PJ shorts. Not leaving enough time for you to finish a thought, Shota wrapped his arms around you, one snaking around your waist and the other rubbing your back. “Hi baby..” 

You released yourself from his embrace, taking a moment to look at his face and notice the small differences. He looked tired and weary, no thanks to the battles he had endured. Despite everything, it was still your Shota standing in front of you. Your eyes moved down to his lips and before you could think you were all over them. You pulled back, apologizing, “Oh! Sorry,” you knelt down to pick up some of his bags, “let’s let you get settled in first.” 

The two of you carried his bags to your bedroom, placing them on the floor. Before Shota made an effort to unpack, he walked over to you and brought you in for another hug, this one tighter than the last. One of his hands was wrapped warmly against your head, bringing you closer to his chest. You inhaled, making a mental note to lock his sweet musk scent away for when he inevitably had to leave again. “I missed you so much baby, you have no idea.” he spoke, his voice soft and gravelly. 

You loosely pulled away from him and looked into his eyes, one of your hands holding his cheek and his hands still lingering low around your waist. “I missed you too Sho. It felt impossible without you here. I’m just so happy you’re okay.” He smiled down at you and planted a small kiss on your lips. He deepened the kiss, disentangling your entire being yet somehow making you feel more full than you ever had all at once. His hand was now placed against the nape of your neck, all the while slowly backing you up into the nearest wall. 

Once you felt your back touch the wall you couldn’t help but break free of the kiss and gasp, being too entranced to notice the position you were in until now. Shota wasted no time in returning to the kiss, using the hand on your neck to bring you closer to him. The two of you melted into the kiss, a mix of small groans and whines left Shota’s mouth as he lost himself in you. He broke away from the kiss, taking a moment to look at you beneath his frame before speaking, “Baby I need you right now..” he groaned, searching for approval in your eyes. You displayed agreement through a nod and took a step forward. Shota, before beginning to take off your clothes, gently let his hands run across your body longer than he needed to. It had been so long since he had been able to feel your skin underneath him, he wanted to savor it. 

He took off your shirt, admiring what was underneath as he lifted it above your head. Once he discarded it to the side, he worked on removing your bra. You were now completely bare from the waist up and your dark haired husband couldn’t help but stare. “Oh I’ve missed you so much.” He lowered his earlier kisses down to the side of your neck, bending his knees as he moved down to kiss your exposed breasts, one hand massaging the other as he worked. You let out soft moans, the pleasure slowly surging through you. It was more intense than usual, it had felt like eons since you had been touched by him, yet it seemed he still knew exactly how to please you. 

‘C’mere baby,” he led you to your shared bed, sitting you on the edge. You were almost laying down, your elbows propped up stopping you from doing so. Shota got down to his knees in front of you, sliding his hands on either side of your thighs and he slid your shorts off, your panties being the only remaining article. Upon seeing your wetness seeping through the cloth, Shota chuckled  “Awh baby, you’re soaked.” He looked up at you with lust clouded eyes. “Let me touch you, please love.” It took you a moment to fully process and respond to him, you were far too distracted by the sight of your usually dominant husband kneeling before you, so undone. “Yes-yeah, of course you can.” you responded after far too long of a pause. 

He returned one of his hands to its earlier position, slid against your thigh only now massaging you slowly. His other hand moved up slowly to your clothed pussy and you gasped when you felt him touch you. He used his hands to spread your legs open and teased small traces along your inner thighs, moving his face closer. You shivered as you felt the warmth of his breath close in. He planted a trail of the most gentle kisses up your thighs, pausing once he got just close enough to make you antsy. You whimpered, “please Sho..need you..”

“You know I can’t say no when you ask like that.” he smirked, then slid your panties off, gliding a finger down your slit. He inched his face closer, attaching his mouth to your clit after a few small licks. The wave of pleasure crashed down on you all at once, “Oh Sho…” you moved your hands to grab his head, tangling your fingers in his hair. Once his gentle demeanor faded, he was devouring you like a madman, groaning and mumbling into your arousal. “You don’t know how much I’ve missed this..” he lazily groused, slipping two fingers into you. He curled them up into you, the sheer amount of unfamiliar pleasure was almost overstimulating.

Your grip on his hair tightened, indicating he must have been doing something right. He paused to look up at you, “Yeah? You like that? ‘Course you do..” he trailed off, his mouth finding you again. Your nerves heated your entire body, that combined with the growing knot in your belly was enough to push you over the edge. You bucked your hips, now riding his fingers more than anything. He pulled his face up to look at you again. “Oh baby you look so pretty coming undone f’me right now.” his fingers sped up reaching places you didn’t know could be reached. “So pretty.”

“I’m- fuck.. M’ so close Sho..” you couldn’t control yourself anymore. Rolling your hips at the same speed his fingers were fucking you, you couldn’t help but toss your head back in satisfaction, your release smashing against you. “That’s it baby.. good girl..” Shota spoke, his fingers never once slowing until you were worn out. You whined due to the absence that filled you as he removed his digits. 

He stood up, looming over your relaxed frame. He knelt down to kiss your forehead, grabbing one of your hands to help you sit upright. “You did so good baby.. So good.” He sat next to you, stroking your hair. “Oh I love you Shota, so much.” you whined into him. ”I love you too [Name].” He smiled, honestly not wanting to get up. “Now let's get you cleaned up, it’s late.”

“What about you though? I feel bad not returning anything..” You said, feeling a mix of pleasure and guilt all in one go. “Don’t worry about me, we have plenty of time.” Shota responded. He walked to the bathroom, starting a hot bath with a mix of calming oils; then returned to you and brought you to the tub.

The two of you were slipped in you got comfortable in the middle of his legs, your back resting against his chest. “I love you Shota.” you closed your eyes, feeling relaxed enough to go to sleep right in the tub.

He wrapped his arms around your torso. “I love you too, [Name].”

[lanadelreyscokewhor3]

THE MASK- J.B BARNES

Pairing: Boyfriend! Bucky x Fem! Reader

Word Count: 1.5k

Request: you convince bucky that every few months, your skin starts to peel off during your period :)

Warnings: nothing much, just swearing, readers period mentioned, the rest is all super fluffy and sweet<33

You drummed your fingers against the polished granite vanity, mindlessly gazing at yourself in the bathroom mirror. The drain from the soaker tub gurgled, the last remains of the warm water and lavender bubble bath trickling down the drain.

Bucky’s sweater hung heavy on you, the warm, fleece fabric draping down past your knees as you slid it on. Your skin felt like a baby’s bottom due to the lotion you had rubbed all over yourself, smelling of fresh linens.

It was the last day of your period, thank god- and all you could think to do to celebrate not dying was to reward yourself with a self-care day. It had been a stressful week, the hormones not helping any matters to your already stressful work life.

It had been a whirlwind of emotions, heavy flow, cramps so painful you thought they could be contractions, headaches… anything under the sun- you name it, you had it.

Bucky had been with you the whole way through, and you were beyond thankful for him and his thoughtfulness towards the matter. He had never complained, or found it gross. He just comforted you the best he could, and that was all you could ever ask for.

You thought of him now as the candle flickered in the corner, flames licking the air as you were deep in thought. You had done every self-care thing you could possibly think of, a warm bath, a candle, a good book, and some good skin care. You had even painted your nails earlier- which was saying a lot. You had never been able to make time for that.

The only thing you could think of was a face mask. You smiled, happy you had thought of such a brilliant idea. When was the last time you managed to do one? You couldn't even remember. Your skin would be very, very thankful- especially during this time of the month.

You crouched down, opening cupboards and drawers to try and find a mask. No luck. With a sigh, you grabbed your phone- background of Bucky and your kitty Alpine sleeping together on the couch peering up at you.

Dialing his number, you let it ring, though it was no longer than five seconds before you heard an answer.

“Hiya sugarplum. What can I do you for?” he asked cheerfully, and you couldn't stop the smile that blossomed across your face, and the way your toes curled in their fuzzy socks at the sound of his husky voice.

“Ohhh nothin much. Just wondering if you’re still downtown.”

“I’m meeting up with the guys in twenty minutes to grab the takeout and then we’re heading back. Did you need something honey?”

You heard a little thump from the bedroom, Alpine jumping down from his nest to trot over to you as you made your way to stretch out on the soft bed.

“Could you grab me a facemask from the drugstore? I’ll send you a picture of what it looks like.”

“Of course babe. And yes, please do because you know I’m no good with those things. Anything else?” There was a honk that sounded from his end, the sound of streetcars and bustles of people passing him by. You could bet a million dollars he was on Fifth, which was perfect since you knew there was a drugstore in that same area.

That made you feel less guilty about asking, even though he insisted that he enjoyed picking up little things for you. The dozens of flowers, stuffies and little things he had picked up on, like your favourite nail polish (when you did have the time to do them), your favourite sweets and goodies were stocked in your shared loft at all times to prove it.

“No that’s all baby. I’ll send you some money.”

“Oh hush your pretty lips. Mwah!” he kissed the phone, and before you could insist on anything, he hung up. You sighed, tossing your phone somewhere on the large bed, snuggling into a fuzzy warm blanket as Alpine joined for cuddles.

“We never can win with him can we angel? He’s so good to us.” you smiled, scratching under his chin as he purred loudly, claiming a spot beside your stomach to curl up in a ball.

“I guess we’ll just have to repay him with kisses when he gets home, won't we?”

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The night was in full swing- although that didn't mean much for tonight. It was relaxing and laid back, takeout boxes scattered on the kitchen counter, hockey game playing on the flatscreen.

Bucky had returned right as expected, not only with a face mask but with your favourite chocolate as well. You nibbled on it now as everyone sprawled out on the couch, Natasha and Wanda joining the pair of you with Sam and Steve.

You sat tangled with Bucky, slumped back against his chest, the slight tickle of the facial hair bringing you comfort as you snuggled closer to him. It was then you remembered the face mask, now sitting on your bathroom vanity. You wiggled out of his gentle embrace, through the tangles of blankets and long limbs of your friends to grab a piece of popcorn, popping it in your mouth.

“You guys wanna do a mask?” you asked the girls after the buttery goodness has been swallowed, the guys too focused on the game to notice you had even stood up.

They nodded, and the three of you made your way through the hallway with Alpine on your heels back out to the bathroom. “Ooo a peel one? I haven’t done one of these in forever.” Wanda smiled, holding the bottle in the faint golden light as she read the directions.

“Me either. That's why I asked Bucko to grab me one.” You hopped up on the counter beside the sink, letting your feet dangle and kick against the wooden drawers as Nat held your hands out, examining your nails in the light.

“He’s such a sweetheart to you. I want him next.” Natasha sighed, and you kicked her thighs gently as she laughed.

“There will be no next dummy duck. Plus, Steve has been eying you up all night. For weeks now, actually. It’s making me want to vomit.”

“Like you and Bucky don’t do that all the time. It’s like you have a bullseye on your ass. And tits. And face. That man’s seriously in love, ya know.”

You watched as Wanada smeared the clear, jelly like on her face, and you did the same. It was cool to the touch, smelling faintly of citrus, and you relaxed as the mask started to harden on your face.

“Should I peel mine off in front of the guys to freak em out?” You giggled, knowing the look on Bucky's face would be priceless. You couldn’t want to go out and show him. The girls fought to keep a straight face as the timer went off, and the three of you walked out to the main room.

It was dim enough they wouldn't be able to see the edges of the mask, and the fact it was clear helped your case even more. You sat next to Bucky, acting as nothing had changed.

“So what's the plan for tomorrow?” you asked nonchalantly, starting to slowly peel the mask from your skin. It felt like snakes skin between your fingers as you felt it slightly tugging on your pores.

“Oh, I was just thinking we could sleep in or- WHAT THE FUCK?!” Bucky gasped, frozen and place as he watched you remove the mask. Steve and Sam sat up, startled at his sudden outburst, watching you with alarm

“What? Didn’t you know that women shed their skin during the last day of their period?” you asked casually, holding back a giggle as you saw Natasha and Wanda with their hands clamped over their mouths, fighting the fit of laughter at the guys reaction.

“No?! This actually happens?” he asked, mouth agape as the “skin” sat in your palm, flaking and dried at the edges.

“Well duh.” you shrugged and you watched as his eyes flickered over to Sam’s as to say what the fuck. “Oh so you’d love me if I were a worm, but you don’t love me now that I shed skin? Thanks baby.” you remarked, tone slightly agitated despite wanting to shake him silly.

“No, no it’s not that-”

“Oh you dumbass it’s a mask! Did you really think I was a snake?” you exclaimed, swatting his arm playfully. Natasha and Wanda couldn't hold back any longer, their laughter following yours as the guys calmed down.

“Well how was I supposed to know it's a mask? It looks clear!” he guessed, making you laugh even harder. “You guys are lucky you’re cute. Cause there's nothing up there.” Wanada joked, tapping her temple.

“You guys are mean. Really fuckin mean.” Sam sighed, head slouching back against the cushions while the three of you disposed of the masks.

“You love us.” you smiled, kissing the top of his head before you swung your body over the back of the couch- back into the safety of Bucky's arms.

“I love you the most though. My beautiful little snake.” he cooed, to which you rolled your eyes.

“Only yours babe.”

[mr-stottlemonk]

I’ve been rewatching the first season, and I remembered how Stottlemeyer is rude to Monk in the beginning. It’s especially strange since the flashbacks show they were good friends before Trudy passed away. What do you think happened, story wise, that changed his attitude to be negative towards Monk? No pressure to answer this btw, I realize it’s a bit of a tricky question.

ohhh, i've been rewatching the first season quite a lot lately as well. and yeah, i have a lot of thoughts and feelings about that too!! [long post so more under the cut]

there's a lot of bitterness there imo that grew from his guilt from being unable to do much to help Monk out - i can imagine how it was after the funeral. Monk a husk of a shell, completely gone. Stottlemeyer held his hand for probably 2 years of the total three when monk catatonic... before hiring Sharona to help out. but trudy's death; it took his best friend away and he couldn't do much of anything to help, it was most likely impossible to. Monk died too that day.

it's quite common to easily dislike someone as they sink into their grief. but how could he? Stottlemeyer also often channels a lot of his grief, sadness, confusion and helplessness through anger - which is exactly what he did when Monk came back.

Monk comes back to the field. he's bitter cause he feels guilty. angry because the last time he most likely saw Monk: he was a disaster. what if bringing him on the field also triggers something? (we see as the show goes on that when it comes to cases that include bombs, he always makes it known that Monk isn't obligated to take the case at all)

there's also, honestly, the professionnel point of view - Stottlemeyer is the Captain of the Police. He's been doing the job for years and quite a few years before Monk as well. He expects the mayor to trust him to do his work. And by bringing in Monk it's probably sending the wrong message and also puts him a spot where he thinks his department probably assume that he doesn't know how to do his job.

in the end of the first episode though, you notice just how absolutely glad he is to have Monk by his side again. Monk piecing everything together.

He loves Monk. Always has. He never stopped. He was just consumed by his own grief for him too.

on the side note: i've seen it mentioned around a few times that Stottlemeyer's heavily negative attitude was also the writers' doing until Levine stepped in and said otherwise (thank heck for him).

cause if he didn't, i don't think the show would have gone on for very long either, lmfao.

i hope i managed to answer your ask well enough <333

[castlebyersafterdark]

often thinking about mike and will being embarrassed by their 'sex faces' or O faces when they first get together. doesnt have to be sex-related but even just foreplay stuff? this was a storyline i enjoyed in the netflix show Sex Education. maybe it's more of a girl thing than a guy thing to feel self conscious about that in pop culture? guys stereotypically seem to get self conscious about things like dick size or prem ejac, but i see a fair bit of will hiding by covering his face or feeling embarrassed cos mike is looking at him. i would love to see more of mike being like that though - not babygirl mike, not sub mike, but mike who is a bit self conscious about his 'frogface' and his body. finn is so good at the whole performance of awkwardness and anxiousness with mike, he's assertive but also very shy about personal things isnt he? and i can just see mike screwing up his face or feeling embarrassed about showing pleasure on his face to will. bonus points if there's more to it than appearances: one of my personal favs is mike feeling bad for being sexual with will because will only ever relied on him for support and friendship (seemingly), and so for mike to have been fancying him all this time throughout his experiences with the UD (especially in s5) is something mike feels guilty about.

Ohhh, this is a good one, because what's more intimate than someone's o-face??? Because you gotta do all the do to get to the O, right? Seeing someone lost in pleasure and no matter how they look, it's such a reward. I think it can be a universal point of insecurity for anyone, but I will say I've personally found from experience out in the world, is that guys are a lot more self conscious of their noises more so than their facial expressions. And noooo, do not hide that, please make noise! Men moaning and whimpering good lord, please. Don't hold that back. Maybe when you're uhhhh unable to not be a little noisy, it does make you feel some sort of way when the other guy is trying to just be quiet like. Come on, man. All in the past though😉

But there's also an element of emotional vulnerability, throughout the course of whatever it is two people are getting up to. You look to your partner to gauge what's going on, what's working, what might not be. And the intensity can be a lot, getting stared at in a normal situation can be a lot, eye contact can be intimidating, or super exposed? I see that more so than the point of orgasm, where you almost can't control how you look?

Especially, I think a lot of us, head canon Will crying during sex. He'd want to hide, try not to let on that yet again, the tears are flowing. But Mike, I do think this could also ring true for him as you've described. I just don't think in his younger days and early on in their relationship he's completely accepting of himself in many regards - ok, Will likes me, he loves me. But despite his looks, maybe is how he thinks. I see him as very self conscious over appearance based on what he's dealt with. All insecurities grow tenfold when you're vulnerable - i.e. during sex. I like an assertive Mike in the bedroom, but that comes with time. I think he'd lead a bit, but he's so shy and unsure, too. He's also maybe still got some hang-ups about internalized guilt for his sexuality, like he's so happy to be there with Will, but he's spent so long telling himself not to fantasize about it that while it's happening, there's all the sudden a drop in your stomach, like the floor fell out or the hill on a roller coaster, you momentarily forget where you are, you dissociate for a blip. You were one moment enjoying pleasure, in bed with the guy you like, but the intensity of being looked at and seen - those thoughts reappear for a split second and the terror and guilt of telling yourself you shouldn't be doing this washes over you and your face screws up, not that something feels bad, but you feel wrong over the fact that it's good. It's realistic, when you're young. Mike would live that. His face journeys are dramatic.

Changing mood entirely - this is so wrong of me but what blog are we on right now - listen. Pause that damn Mike season 4 monologue at certain frames and it looks like that boy is getting.... 🤭

[linalilia]

[meet the prisoners!] prisoner 003: ishizu shun!

ohhh he is so pathetic. i'm not even sure if i mean it in an affectionate way or like. i really do think he's pathetic.

(also yes i accidentally named two of my ocs after the canon prisoners' vas and at first i panicked and tried to think of something different, but i decided to keep these names, because it's kinda funny, especially because this boy's personality reminds me of haruka a lot and. well. prisoner 002 is not like kotoko AT ALL)

also i did mention that these guys have "canon verdicts" but i'd love to see what you guys think about him, because i really don't know if he would be voted innocent or guilty, haha. honestly most of my ocs would be voted guilty. it's okay they deserve it

(prisoner 001's profile)

(prisoner 002's profile)

Warning: mentions of derealization, an unhealthy relationship dynamic and questionable coping mechanisms.

General info:

Name: Ishizu Shun (石津 俊) (kanjis in his last name mean "stone" and "harbor" and kanji in his first name means "talented")

Age: 24 y/o

Gender: Male

Status: Prisoner 003

Birthday: July 13 (Cancer)

Height: 185 cm (i know he doesn't look like it but. he really is tall)

Blood type: O

Image color: #ECD4FF

Occupation: Fast food worker

Personality: Shun is one of the weirdest prisoners here. At first he just seems like someone who's very shy, has low self-confidence and gets scared easily, but when you get to know him better, you realize that this guy's brain works in a very strange way. Shun forgets things very easily, if he screams and you ask him what scared him so much, he will most likely just go ".. I don't remember". He also often feels like nothing around him is real and he often asks other prisoners or guards if they really are in Milgram right now or he's just dreaming. He looks lost and confused most of the time and he often ends up in very awkward situations. He's even more clumsy than Prisoner 002 and it's hard for him to see because of his hair, however, he still refuses to get a haircut for some reason. He refuses to do anything that might help him get better, like taking care of himself or even simply watching where he's going. It also should be mentioned that he doesn't remember only the things that made him feel bad in some way, for example, something that scared him or made him cry. If something makes him smile or laugh, he will still remember it well. He also often says the most random things in the middle of a conversation and even though at first some prisoners thought that he's just not good at paying attention, they later found out that he can perfectly understand what others are talking about, but he will still talk about something else instead.

MV info:

Which canon Milgram song he would cover: Throw Down. I also thought about Half but you see.. the Throw Down visuals fit his crime better :) And This Is How To Be In Love You is way too cheerful for someone like him, haha.

Which DECO*27 song he would cover: Dilemma.

If he could cover a song by a different Vocaloid producer, which one would it be: OHHHH I KNOW WHICH SONG I WANT HIM TO COVER but it perfectly describes his entire crime so.. I feel like it would work better as a Trial 2 (or even Trial 3) song. So for this trial I'll go with Karakuri Pierrot by 40meterP! Come on, boy, sing a sad love song for us.

His MV description: His MV would most likely have colors like dark shades of green, teal and blue, but it also would slowly start becoming more and more glitchy, so it would also have colors like bright red or purple. His MV would also look.. kind of weird, it's supposed to make the viewer feel anxious and feel like nothing in this video is real and Shun actually never did anything like this.

In the beginning, his MV would feel like the viewer is watching him through the cameras and we're supposed to observe him. We can see Shun checking his calendar and getting excited. He leaves the room and now he's in the kitchen and we're watching him through a different camera. It looks like he's trying to bake a cake, but he has no idea what to do, so he tries to look up something on his phone. However, for some reason he gets distracted and we can see him standing there and just scrolling, while his eyes become more and more empty. When he's done, he looks like he's about to cry, but then the POV changes and we're no longer watching him through the cameras, we see everything from Shun's perspective. We can see a bright red error message appearing right in front of him and if you look closer, you can notice it saying "Get back to work. Everything is fine" in a smaller font.

He keeps trying to bake a cake and he's slowly getting better at it, but he still gets distracted while doing it. We go back to watching him and we can see him looking at his ceiling, checking his phone every five seconds and going back to his room to check the closet for some reason and when he does so, he smiles and waves at.. someone hiding in there, maybe? More and more error messages keep appearing in front of him and they all say things like "None of this has ever happened" or "You have no reason to worry about this". The video starts becoming more glitchy and we can notice some things looking more blurry. For example, we can see Shun texting someone, but we can't see their name and their replies to his texts. However, we can still see Shun's messages. "I still want to spend this day with you though." "I know that we're no longer dating, but.." "I thought that maybe you can come and visit me today?" "You know.. we can just hang out as friends! I won't ask you to come back to me, I promise." Shun also has a lot of photos in his room, but all of them look extremely blurry.

When Shun is finally done with the cake, it doesn't look that great, but it's clear that he worked hard on it. He looks proud and right when he leaves the kitchen while holding a cake, he looks very happy at first, but then for some reason he ends up looking.. disappointed. Turns out that he has not one, but two guests and we can't even see one of them because of a huge error message. We can definitely see another guest though and he looks like a tall attractive dark-haired man who's holding another person's hand. But judging from his face expression, he doesn't look like the nicest person. Shun panics and he doesn't know what to do and suddenly everything around him becomes red and you can see exclamation marks everywhere and messages that say "Something is wrong, but don't worry about it". For a second you can see one of the messages saying "YOU are wrong, but don't worry about it". Everything goes black for a moment and the song stops playing as well. After that, the POV changes again and now we see everything from Shun's "error" guest perspective. He is smiling and eating a cake that he made and right when the guest looks at their boyfriend who's lying on the floor, Shun comes closer to them and closes something that looks like closet doors while still smiling. We can't see anything after that and the MV ends.

His Trailer 1 Voicelines:

"Um.. wait, d-do I have to introduce myself? I.. uh.. m-my name is Ishizu Shun, I guess.. Listen, I really d-don't think I should be here. I didn't do anything wrong, I swear! I just wanted to protect the person I love, that's all! I'm sure she misses me a lot too.."

"Oh.. so she forgot about our anniversary.." *sighs* "I just.. I wish she cared about me as much as I care about her."

Trivia.

He really wants to be voted innocent and the thought of getting voted guilty terrifies him.

He claims that he didn't commit any other crimes except murder but one of the guards doesn't believe him because he thinks this guy is way too suspicious.

He's surprisingly close with Prisoner 005, even though their personalities are so different. Prisoner 005 tries to help him open up and he also asked one of the guards to bring him a notebook so that he can give it to Shun as a gift. He thought that Shun would find that notebook useful because he can write down everything that happened during a day there so that he won't forget anything later.. but Shun also forgot that he has to write in that notebook.

Shun isn't really close with any other prisoners except Prisoner 005, however, Prisoner 006 is also very interested in him and she mentioned that if it wasn't for him having a girlfriend, she would definitely date him. He doesn't know how to feel about that though.

Shun's hair is dyed and his real hair color is dark purple. He dyed it before he got a girlfriend and he hoped that women will find him more attractive and interesting after that.

Nobody knows what Shun's eyes really look like because of his hairstyle, except one of the prisoners and they said that his eyes are completely empty and it actually makes him look like he's already dead. They think it's cute though.

One of the guards thinks that Shun intentionally forces himself to forget about the things he doesn't want to remember and that's how he copes with his stress. And considering how anxious he always is, that explains why his memory is so bad, literally anything can make him feel stressed and he just forgets about everything so that he doesn't have to worry about it.. or maybe he just pretends to forget things. Who knows. Maybe he really is smarter than he looks like.

[kissmetwicekissmedeadly]

🧿what steps do you take to not take things personally if a fic doesn't do well, or if your writing/posting/sharing experience isn't going how you'd like it to?

🕯️was there a fic that was really hard on you to write, or took you to a place you didn't think it would take you?

🌈is there a fic that you worked *really fucking hard on* that no one would ever know? maybe a scene/theme you struggled with?

I totally forgot about the ask game 😭😅 Thank you Violet!

🧿what steps do you take to not take things personally if a fic doesn't do well, or if your writing/posting/sharing experience isn't going how you'd like it to?

"Oh. maybe they'll like this next one better 👍🏻*opens another wip*"

🕯️was there a fic that was really hard on you to write, or took you to a place you didn't think it would take you?

(i talk about a smut fic here for whoever wants to skip <3)

Off the top of my head, the Dirty Dance For Three (Arthur/MC/Isaac poly smut) because at the time @scummy-writes was that one cool person that i look up to and we hadn't interacted much up to that moment (and now is That one cool person that i look up to and we frens :)) *blushes*) so that's one factor, another is, for some reason i took the ikemen gift exchanges REAL SERIOUSLY, i tried to give my everything to craft my giftees their perfect fics because it's like a very detailed and special request?? and i wanted this fic in particular to be more than your ordinary threesome so i spent some time wondering how to show their wholesome poly relationship outside the sexy parts 😭 it ended up being almost 4k words long and i wrote it in multiple sittings which happens very rarely for me,,,, i love it lotsss i ended up missing being inside the world of the fic once i got finished with it! i need to give it a reread some time!

🌈is there a fic that you worked *really fucking hard on* that no one would ever know? maybe a scene/theme you struggled with?

Ohhh let me think... maybe the three headcanon + scenario fics with Napoleon ( Our Little Family , Making a home , A piece of heaven on earth ) - especially the most recent one about their family life, i was constantly doubting all i know about kids 😂 ended up reading tips on how to write kid characters (which is actually the first time ever i looked up writing tips) but then there's the historical facts i weaved into it, like the bunny army battle which i honestly thought i made up in my head up to that point 😂, THEN the kids' names. oh my god. i feel like some parents pick their firstborn's name quicker than i did for napoleon and mc's 😭😭 i spent two days looking up baby names from five different origins (french, italian, roman, greek, latin) , then i spent another two or three days going through TONS of pinterest boards searching for perfect pics for the post. but it was a labor of love. all of it. i do that sort of fic once in a year (typically my first fic) so that i can feel like "okay, i have one well-made fic about napo, i can go on without feeling guilty towards him!" it's very silly actually and it might sound like a lot of work but i promise you it gives me a lot of happiness and once it's done i spend a whole year thinking about the next theme :))) ❤❤❤

-> ask game (you're never too late to this!)

[linabirb]

OK OK SO. 3 16 24 (i was LITERALLY gonna ask abt 6 and 7 but taru beat me to it LMAOAOAOAO) ummm i wanna see for twst and milgram pls <3

HEHEHEHEHE thank you for sending these sol!!

3. "screenshot or description of the worst take you've seen on tumblr"

twst: OHHHHHH THERE'S A LOT. but i'll keep it short. again, that one bday vignette line and also people saying that riddle will grow up just like his mother despite the character development he got. that one hurts me so much because again, i had said it many times, i have anger issues myself and one of the many reasons why i like riddle is because of how much i relate to him and because he feels so human and not just. you know. "haha angy boi". so seeing things like "ohhh he should never have children because he will treat them like he was treated when he was little" is so. painful.

milgram: tbh there's so many that my brain just kinda refuses to process them anymore ALSO SINCE THE FANDOM IS KINDA SMALL. I FEEL LIKE ALL THOSE POSTS ARE EASY TO FIND but again i'll keep it short: mahiru is NOT a stalker/kidnapper/etc, stop saying she is, she literally said she's not one and i doubt it was a lie and also hhhhhhh i have my. own opinion about whatever is going on with kazui but i don't wanna go into detail but basically. before he himself said that his crime wasn't related to cheating, there were some people who were like.. very passionate about voting him guilty because he's a cheater and like. i'm sorry this is so funny to me like we have a guy who killed a child and MANY different animals, we have a guy who cyberbullied a teenage girl into committing suicide, MIKOTO, SHIDOU LITERALLY ASKED "WHICH ONE" AFTER HE GOT A QUESTION ABOUT HIS VICTIM(S) and cheating is where you draw the line?? 😭😭 ah and also whoever says that it was his wife's fault <3 i'm in your walls right now.

16. "you can't understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc)"

twst: HMMMMM LET ME THINK ABOUT IT. okay okay let's see. well, first of all, i'm not a fan of the time loop theory simply because i'm not a fan of time loop tropes in general. i'm pretty sure there was a time (i think it was like.. late 2000's-early 2010's? maybe even earlier) where like ALMOST EVERY SINGLE VISUAL NOVEL, GAME, ANIME, MANGA, ETC (but especially vns), used that trope AND I HATED IT SO MUCH. i love it when time loops are used to make a character go through the same painful event over and over again to completely change their character, but most of the time (haha get it) time loops feel like.. basically it's like writers use them to just explain everything that doesn't exactly make sense in-universe. why does this character say mc looks familiar to them and doesn't elaborate? well that's because they've seen them before in previous loops! why does mc know how this world works even though they've never been there? well that's because time loop! why do these two characters are in love with each other even though they've never even talked? well that's because they were in love in previous loops! i can talk about my hatred for that trope for hours, honestly.

okay, let's talk about characterization. tbh there's not much i can say because.. let's be honest, even though twst characters are definitely deep and interesting and fun, their personalities feel a bit "limited"(?) mostly because of their disney counterparts or because of how strong certain traits of their personalities are. and i'm not complaining.. mostly. i really wish some characters had more personality traits. but what i really hate is when some writers just.. throw away all the "ugly" or "unlikeable" traits of those characters to make them more "imagines-friendly". like i'm sorry, but sometimes i just read some fics and go "he would NOT say that". i know that people love the "OH BUT HE'S NICE TO Y/N" trope, i use it too sometimes, but like.. some people just really forget that this game is about characters who are literally based on disney villains. like it's okay, let them have flaws. and i don't mean those flaws that are like "omg he's so shyyyy >///<" or "hehe he can ramble a lot <3" NO. I MEAN ACTUAL FLAWS.

milgram: it's okay. it's okay guys. i promise it's okay that somebody can't see that character being gay or ships them with someone of an opposite sex. it's okay. and that's coming from someone who has almost no straight ocs.

like, listen, i'm a 0104 shipper. i see their relationship as romantic but i absolutely have nothing against platonic interpretations. but when people see something like ship art and go "muu is literally a lesbian btw" i'm like. i have so many hcs too but it's one thing to say that "hey i think this headcanon is very plausible and i think it's very neat" and to go "IT'S LITERALLY CANON" unironically and not as a joke. like idk, i'm just that kind of person who has lots of headcanons but until i see them actually being confirmed, i won't try to make people change their mind. (and just so you know i'm not trying to deny that she's attracted to girls. she has that vibe and she literally says "i love you" when she sees a girl and her pupils become bigger like?? but come on. it's okay for people to ship her with a male character until she literally says that she's not into boys in canon)

kazui is a whole different thing, i really was interested in the whole "yeah he's gay actually" theory and i love the memes, but now that people are saying it's "officially" canon and lowkey just. kinda being annoying, yeah, i don't even want to look at the tag anymore because i want to see actual theories and i don't want to see another "yeah he's gay so vote him inno". i'm not here to say that it's a dumb reason to forgive him, since we are literally allowed to have all kinds of reasons to forgive a character, but i think it's a weird thing to say when this guy really does seem like a very deep character, but i can't take him seriously anymore because of those theories that don't even sound like theories (and i mean it in a bad way and not bc they sound so canon)

24. "topic that brings up the most rancid discourse"

twst: honestly, this fandom mostly has like.. people-related drama, like this artist/writer/etc did something problematic, things like that. but i think if i had to choose a topic that annoys me the most.. these two topics kinda go together but i'll start with mc's gender. it actually doesn't get discussed that often, since we're supposed to see them as a self-insert, but i've really seen people say things like "mc is obviously supposed to be female" or "mc is obviously supposed to be male", etc.

i'm not going to pretend that i don't have my own opinion and i'm going to say that tbh i see twst mc as being male (one of the reasons why my mc is a guy), but that's mostly just because i usually prefer to play as a guy when it comes to games like that. (honestly if i have a choice, i choose fem mcs very rarely, stelle is like one of the few exceptions) however, i never try to prove why i'm right, i just kinda go "eh you do you". but i'm not gonna lie, those who believe that mc is female are the most annoying ones, like i get it, of course, a large part of twst fandom are women who are attracted to men, but also. there are. so many otome games. no literally a huge reason why i often don't feel comfortable playing otome games is because I HAVE NO IDEA WHY but i really just don't want to play as a girl and i don't want those characters to see my mc as a girl. (i rarely see my mc as a self-insert btw and almost always see them as their own character) LIKE I DON'T KNOW CAN'T PEOPLE WHO SEE THEIR MCS AS MALE/NB HAVE SOMETHING. like i literally love twst and obey me (i really should play it more often but again. my phone doesn't like it and idk if it will run on my tablet) exactly because of how "genderless" their mcs feel and that i can just see them as whatever gender i want them to be. and idk it just.. doesn't feel good when people are trying to remind me that "btw mc is obviously supposed to be a girl" especially when i already kinda know that considering the audience/demographic.

the second topic was probably more popular to discuss when i first got into the game and when it first came out: character x mc or character x character. i was a big character x character enjoyer and didn't really care about character x mc at first until i got interested in riddleyuu and malleyuu. but yeah, watching those sides fight was like. guys you both are losing. like some character x character fans were being mean and hating on self-inserts and some character x mc fans were saying things like "y'all just want more guys to ship". and like. there's nothing wrong with both of those things like calm down. i still can see people arguing because of that, but i just try to ignore them now tbh.

milgram: *clicks on the tag* .. yeah whatever is going on right now.

[sammy-witha-c]

What song do you think fits each of the S2 teens the most?

Or if you just have a character playlist too, I just need new songs ;;

Oh hello!! Ohhh I have so many but no proper playlist- I'll list around five for each teen, if that's alright!! They all have a lil explaination too :)

Scary:

"Lotta True Crime", Penelope Scott

Scary is sooooo a true crime girl, what a problematic fav... In general I just find a lot of this song almost feels like it's in her voice, especially the stuff about the anger of the unfairness of it all and the desperation for connection.

"dead girl in the pool.", girl in red

Hmmm this one is a little hard to explain. It's like. There's a dead girl in the pool and it's actually you and it's your past self and you're watching her float away and you miss her / and you hate her / and you don't want to tell anyone because that would be admitting that used to be you but it hurts to see her not have a proper burial. She's still in you. You know?

"I Am A Poseur", X-Ray Spex

MY LIL PUNK GIRL!! Looove her.

"Feel Better", Penelope Scott

I feel like this one is pretty self-explainitory!!

"jerk", The Front Bottoms

Scary feeling guilty over hurting the people she loves vs nowing they love her anyway. Like. Ughhhh Scary I love you!!

Normal:

"The DJ Is Crying For Help", AJR

I have no explaination for this I just love him :)

"Daisy Bell", by tamachang and CYBER DIVA

Okay so this is less ABOUT Normal and more a song I think Normal would like!! This is a rendition of the song "Daisy Bell" with three computer voices doing a lil trio, one of which is a reanimation of the first computer to 'sing'!!!. The fact that it's a song about love but it's sung by computers, which are made by people's love and wonder and hope, but can objectively not feel it just. Makes me so emo. And I think it would make him pretty emo too :)

"Record Player", Daisy The Great

He struggles with his sense of self bayBEEE.

"Downtown - Uptempo", Anya Taylor-Joy

I've got less of an explaination for this one tbh! More just vibes methinks

"The Chicken", Bo Burnham

He's the heart of the group... he has hope... my boyyyy.

Taylor:

"I Still Taste Fire", Stephanie Mabey

demon taylor... the memory syring... i dunno it makes me emo :)

"Do What You Gotta Do", Decendants

LMAO IDK. this is more a jokey one but it also fits so well?? Taylor would probably listen and take it so seriously. Love this kid.

"Hero of Our Time", Natewantstobattle

Honeslt y most of Taylor's songs are pretty straightforward! He's a hero. It's our time. What more can I say.

"The Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny", Lemon Demon

Am I wrong.

Linc:

"Rainbow Connection", Kermit

idk him <3

"Burn Masculinity", The Spook School

This one's kind of hard to explain?? It just FEELS like Linc to me. I dunno I dunno!!

"Be Nice To Me", The Front Bottoms

Something something Linc and Grant! Complicated. "You're a killer / and I'm your best friend." "You say I'm changing / sorry, I didn't know I had to stay the same."

"Interlude: I'm Not Angry Anymore", Paramore

MY GUY. he has so many complicated feelings he gets angry and then feels bad and it's just a cycle and I love him your honor.

Thank you for the question!! Hope some of these work for you :)

[sourkitsch]

ohhh since you posted school of apelles, i have to ask: thoughts on Odd Nerdrum, his notion of Kitsch and etc?

My url literally has the word kitsch in it (a term from a different essay that I found compelling) & my header image is a Nerdrum preparatory drawing so um. I like him.

BUT. I find him a bit pretentious? Which is hilarious coming from me I guess. I think he’s intelligent person and his art vs. Techne thing is a valid discussion to have via the over-emphasis on concept over skill. Personally, most of the work I find impactful has equal consideration to both. I enjoy how he discusses art history, he makes it engaging and clearly has strong opinions which… I also do.

All that being said he has created a cult of personality around him that I don’t quite buy into? Many “traditional” painters tend to shit on work they don’t understand without trying to understand it at all, and he’s definitely guilty of that. And that goes double for people who aren’t working within the western tradition. In the past he’s also parroted some harmful art historical motifs without actually understanding the impact of said images (his Wandering Jew painting…).

While our personal politics and ethos don’t align, I’ve learned a lot from studying his work! The Apelles YouTube channel has a lot of valuable demonstrations and I’m going to try to try some experiments based on them over the summer. They almost act as a repository for knowledge that would be otherwise lost— ie mediums! I use a lot of synthetic mediums by gamblin, and while alkyds are great as a student in an art institution that prefers acrylic paint, I would like to eventually move away from them in my work, especially as I consider academy training.

More on the kitsch thing: I have personally encountered some eye rolling when I talk about my enjoyment of allegorical and symbolic painting so I get it. Also Nerdrum having a breakdown when he was a student bc of a Rauschenberg… I get that too. First time I read Greenberg’s Avant-garde & Kitsch screed a few years back I saw red. As for the movement itself, it resonates deeply with me. I think there’s incredible value in understanding basic human experiences and impulses through figurative art and even though it’s something that has “been done before” that’s no reason not to continue the tradition. I think art spaces (and in general left leaning spaces tbh) are too focused on wholly abandoning the past without reflecting and learning from it first. Despite all the shit there’s so still much to enjoy. There’s also the new cultural view of like “skill and knowledge is elitist” which is… uh.

Also, I don’t think Nerdrum is as antiquated as people seem to think he is. Honestly I feel like he’s at home in 20th century art. He’s very psychologically motivated and has a lot to say in his work in the vein of psychoanalysis. Don’t kill me but I do kind of think of him as a surrealist with several extra steps.

Ok I could literally talk about this forever but I’m gonna stop now this is already like an essay !!

[nerves-nebula]

heck yeah more tidbits about the kidnapped caleb au!!

okay so consider this: Philip ""helps"" Hunter make a list of "acceptable boy" names, and comes up with conviniet excuses as to why certain ones Hunter picks doesn't work (oh, a close friend of the group was named that, and you don't want to upset people, do you? etc etc). Since it's convenient if Hunter is already going by Hunter (if it's a pre-transing nickname) Philip could pull the card of "you just need to have a new legal name but everyone can call you Hunter if that's what you want" (AKA it doesn't matter what you pick so why not just go with this name that I oh-so conveniently have picked for you?)

ALSO I'm wondering if the cult has anything around names? I know it's a trend in cults for people to change their names, so if in Philip's cult people get cult-gifted names THAT could be a way for Philip to name Hunter Caleb. Say that it's divine and that Hunter gets the extra special privilege of actually being able to change his legal name to his special divine one.

(haha this is totally definitely not based off of how my mother treated my name change. totally wasn't forced to come out and then given a week to pick a pre-approved name and bullied out of the ones I wanted because she didn't like them. haha tooootally not based of that. but uh, side note adults be weird. Also I think it'd be neat if part of Hunter's separating from the cult included him picking a last name for himself. A sort of "their history does not define me" moment)

Ohhh that is EXACTLY what Philip does, the sneaky bastard. He could just force Hunter, of course, but that gives Hunter ammunition to rebel later and claim that Philip FORCED the name Caleb on him! This way, Hunter (Caleb Jr. lmao) would feel guilty, because Philip didn't really force him, right???

i also like the idea of Hunter being a pre-transition nickname that Hunter identifies with the most. So his name is Caleb and everyone calls him Caleb, but he often thinks of himself as Hunter/Caleb interchangeably. could be especially interesting if the nickname Hunter is somehow related to his duties in his uncles religious movement. OK SO Hunter changing his last name is fascinating, because by the time that he'd start thinking about that, he'd probably already have met Caleb. And he wouldnt want to offend Caleb by rejecting his last name. But Caleb would (after feeling hurt of course) suggest he take on his mothers last name, since it's also his to claim. So... potential Hunter Clawthorne????

ALSO since Caleb, Hunter, Evelyn, and Eda all exist at the same time im gonna have to restructure the family line some how... either Evelyn is a third Clawthorne sibling, or is some kind of cousin. cousin would be easier, cause i wouldn't have to restructure Eda & Lilith's relationship. I do like the idea of cult-given names have a specific significance, but tbh I havent thought hard enough about the cults specific religious beliefs and practices yet, so I'll wait until I have that pinned down more to think of a good Divine Meaning of a New Given Name.

If all else fails, it could just be considered an official way of tying of yourself to the cult/giving your entire identity over to it.

also, sorry about your mom. she sounds like a bitch! real piece of work!

[bowdownbucky]

𝐁𝐀𝐃, 𝐁𝐀𝐃, 𝐁𝐀𝐃 !

part 2 <3

summary: you have an encounter with your best friend’s brother bucky!

pairing: innocent! reader x college! bucky

warnings: cursing, asshole! steve rogers, kissing, drug use, oral (female receiving) fingering.

your heart began to beat heavily, bucky didn’t care that his sister was outside of the door but you started to feel guilty. this was so wrong of you and you didn’t even want to look at yourself. “you better answer her sweethear, she’s not gonna leave.” bucky taunts you, he hand trails your stomach, groping your breasts hard. “uh-im almost finished, i h-had to ohhh.” you slap you hand over your mouth, bucky smirks as he pinches you nipple again.

“what?” rebecca moved closer to the door. “are you okay? i’m coming in.” your eyes widens, you pushed bucky away and slowly cracked the door. “i’m f-fine, the um…pizza! the pizza went down the wrong hatch.” you lie. rebecca’s face screws up. “ew i did not need to know that y/n” you watch as she walks into her room. you close the door, leaning your head back onto the wooden frame.

you closed your eyes and hoped that this was all a dream, that you didn’t actually kiss your best friends brother. you slowly open your eyes only to meet a pair of blue eyes, bucky laughs at you. “went down the wrong hatch? seriously?” you cross your arms in front of your chest. “well what was i supposed to say, sorry can’t talk now i’m making out with your brother. she’s kill me!” you exclaim, you ran your hands down your face in an irrational manner. this was too much for you and bucky didn’t see anything wrong with it.

“would you chill out? here take a hit, it will make you feel better.” bucky offers the small bud once more, you smack it out of his hand. “do you always solve your problems with weed!” you hiss. his eyes were low, he watched as the joint flew onto the ground. you hitch your breath realizing what you did, you see his tongue rub his lower lip. you almost melt at the sight.

“your gonna regret the doll.” he seethes into your ear. he pushes you against the door, you let out a yelp but he covers your mouth. “i know a way you can make it up to me, and you are gonna make it up to me. you know why baby?” you shake your head. “because you don’t want to get on my bad side. i would hate to ruin that innocence of yours.” he whisperers, he hands managed to find their way to you ass, giving it a light squeeze before letting you go.

you move from the door and he exits the bathroom, leaving you alone with your thoughts. you could barely comprehend what happened let along what he meant by his bad side. you grabbed the nail polish remover and walk back to rebecca room. “finally! you took forever.” you mumble a small sorry and sat on her bed, she lends you her hand and you get to work on her nails, she chose a peach color and wanted you to add a french tip, such a classic.

as you continue painting her nails she squeals making you mess up the curved line. “becca! your nails!” you groan. “i don’t care! why didn’t you tell me?” you tilt your head confusingly. “you and steve hooked up and you didn’t tel me?!” you eyes go wide. “what! no! where did you get that from?” you ask her. she huffs. “no, no, no, no don’t try to act all innocent! you and chris did it and there is evidence on your neck. i rest my case.” you rush off the bed and check your neck, you internally face palm seeing dark purple marks all over your neck.

“i had no idea steve was like that. i guess i have to stop making fun of him now.” she chuckles. “just taking me home my ass! so how was it? was he big? why arent you giving me details.” rebecca whines, kicking her feet in her bed. you ignored her and attempted to kneed out the hickies. as you run the marks you notice bucky staring at you from his room door, you could practically feel his smirk as you watched his reflection go back to his room. you heart raced as you tried to come up with an excuse.

“it’s no big deal i just burnt myself with a straightener.” you curse to yourself knowing she wouldn’t fall for that. “fine don’t tell me! i’m going to sleep, all this secrecy has made me tired.” rebecca yawns, you hoped she wouldn’t ask you about the hickey again because lying was never your forte. you lie in the large bed, clouded in your own thoughts.

did he like you? was he just messing with you? you had so many assumptions of why he kissed you, what bothered you the most was that you had steve. steve was a jock and you were an outcast, you didn’t know how it would work. even though you and steve hadn’t officially said you were together, you still respected him and wanted to be faithful.

the next morning at school, you kept your head down and didn’t talk to anyone for the most part. no one really seems to notice because you were kind of a nobody. you sat in your forensics class, jotting down notes here and there. you stop writing when you feel a hand creep up your thigh. you turn your head toward steve, he kept a straight face and didn’t acknowledge how unamused you were.

“what are you doing?” you whisper. steve’s hand tries to travel up your skirt but you close your legs firmly. “steve!” he turns to you. “we’re in the middle of class.” you point out. “i’m sorry you know i can’t resist you baby. let me make it up to you but taking you out after homecoming.” you hault yourself as you almost roll your eyes at him. steve could be pushy sometimes especially when it came to losing your virginity to him. you hated that rebecca told him that, now he wouldn’t leave you alone.

“oh really.” you say pretending to be intrigued. “the guys and i bought hotel rooms for tonight and we get to bring a special girl along. and you know since your my favorite girl, i thought we could go together and have fun. go swimming, watch movies, kiss, cuddle, the whole nine and maybe some other stuff if you want.” you remove his hand from your thigh and continue writing notes. “i told you steve i’m not ready for that stuff yet.”

steve huffs, returning back to the lesson. your virginity wasn’t something that you kept sacred but you wanted you first time to be meaningful and steve hadn’t even asked you to be his girlfriend yet so your answer would always be no if he asked. when school ended you took the bus home, you quickly packed a bag full of makeup, hair supplies and your clothes for homecoming. you checked the time, almost cursing yourself seeing how you were going to be late to rebecca’s house.

you ran as fast as you could to the barnes’ house, you could practically feel the lecture rebecca was going to give you. luckily, you live a few blocks down from the barnes so it wouldn’t be too long of a walk/run. when you arrived at the barnes’ you quickly rang the doorbell. the door opens’ revealing a shirtless bucky who looked like he just got out of the shower. “can i help you?” he smirks looking down on you.

“becca t-told m-me to come, for homecoming.” you gulped attempting to maintain eye contact. his couldn’t help but peek at his glistened abs, you really hoped he didn’t catch on to you checking him out. before he could let out a snarky comment rebecca came gritting down the stairs with curlers in her hair. “there you are! y/n your late and we only have three hours to get ready.” you pushed pass bucky and ran up the stairs.

bucky watched at how nervous you were, it was like the fuel he ran on. rebecca closed her door and pushes you onto her vanity chair. “please tell me i have creative freedom tonight!” rebecca pleads with her big blue eyes staring at you. you sigh and nod. she kisses your forehead before beginning your makeup.

after a few hours of prodding, poking, blending, and brushing, rebecca finally finished your makeup and hair. normally you wouldn’t wear makeup because you didn’t know how to do it very well but when you did have it on you truly looked like a princess. “now carefully get into your dress y/n, i swear to god if you mess up an eyelash i will kill you.” she threatens you with her high pitched voice. you removed your jeans and shirt revealing your body, you quickly unzipped the dress as you start to compare your body to rebecca’s. becca was tall and slim while you were a little curvy. you had a small tummy with stretchmarks and she had a flat tummy with a slender waist. your best friend was beautiful and you didn’t want to see mom jealous, so you put up a front and delt with it.

you and rebecca were finally dressed, rebecca looked stunning in her white and pink dress. with the help of rebecca and mrs.barnes, you had pick a pale green dress, the curve of the dress fit you like a glove. the creases on the dress made you look more mature and sexier. you were never use to being sexy so the look on your face made rebecca freak out. “you totally hate it, i knew we should’ve gone with the black dress.” you shake your head. “n-no! it looks…great. thank you becks.” the door opens, your heart quickens when you meet a pair of bright eyes. you noticed bucky had put on a shirt, a part of you were bummed out. “would it kill you to knock! we’re girls who need privacy!” rebecca yells. bucky didn’t give his sister the time of day, his eyes were fixated on you. you felt self conscious as he stared at you long and hard. “mom and dad are going to a banquet dinner in manhattan. they won’t be back until tomorrow.” he tells rebecca. she crossed her arms in confusion. “what? no! i was supposed to have the car tonight. how the hell are we supposed to get to hoco?” rebecca flings her arms up dramatically.

bucky chuckles at his sister’s agony. “wait!” you spoke up as bucky was about to walk away. “c-can y-ou drive us?” you ask quietly. rebecca pulled your arm. “are you crazy? do you know what people say if we shows up to homecoming in a pickup truck?” rebecca vocalized. you couldn’t care less what people had to say, you just wanted and excuse to be see bucky. “becca this is important to you and even you said yourself we had to be there under any circumstances.”

rebecca whines. “fine but you’re dropping us off a block away. i need to retouch my hair, you’ve made me stress away the curls.” you watched as she pushes past bucky, leaving the two of you. you stare at him for a second then turn around, attempting to act uninterested. “you know you should skip this whole homecoming thing altogether.” bucky told you. “what! no, this is important to becca and i promised her i’d be there.” you felt his presence behind you, your back was pressed to his front. “come on doll, you never seemed like the type to be into this stuff anyway. i have a few places we could go instead. wouldn’t that be way more fun.” he was baiting you and hell, you were falling for it very hard. he pushed your hair to the side, laying a kiss on your shoulder. his hand cupped your waist, pulling you as close as you could get.

his pressed more kisses up your neck, he liked testing you, he would make you beg for it if you gave him the chance. “c’mom dollface, don’t you wanna have fun with me?” you almost gave him a nod but refrained. “i should go help rebecca, see you in a few james.” you walk away smiling to yourself, you won this round of the game but best believe, bucky was going to win the next level.

you sat in between bucky and rebecca once more, y’all were currently picking up nathan and steve, your dates for the evening. “you look beautiful beck.” nathan smiles at his girlfriend. rebecca left you in the front with bucky so she could kiss her boyfriend more. steve walks to the front car door but bucky locks him out. “hey man, open the door.” steve groans. the two had seem to have history and now you were going to be in between it. “you know the rules big guy, no douches in the front seat.” bucky smirks. “then why are you sitting up here asshole?” steve sarcastically jokes. rebecca huffed from the back, leaning in the front of the seat. “hey dickheads, we don’t have time for this, have your cat fight after hoco. let’s go!” she demands. steve huffs, taking a seat next to the couple who had no problem with pda.

the ride to the school was pretty silent except for the rock music playing from the radio. you stared out of the window, you could tell bucky was mad because of how tight he was holding the steering wheel, his knuckles were almost white from the tight grip. suddenly, his hand was on your thigh. your eyes widened, you quickly look back to make sure no one saw what was happening. “what are you doing?” you whisper. he doesn’t say anything to you, his hand stays on your thigh and his eyes stay on the road but you could still see the smirk on his face. you tried to push his his hand away but he only moves it higher, almost touching your core. you didn’t want to play games anymore, you were never built for them, you open your legs up more, instead of doing what you wanted, he removed his hand. “alright guys, have a good night.” rebecca and nathan were the first ones to leave the truck. steve exits the truck and stands by youre window. “you coming?” you nod to him. “i’ll be out in a second.” steve walks away from the window, bucky bursts out into laughter.

you throw a punch at his arm but he doesn’t flinch at you. “thats not funny! you’re so mean.” you pout. “no what’s funny is you actually going out with steve.” you eye him in confusion. steve was a good guy, he could be a little pushy but that was just high school boys. “he’s nice and he asked me to go with him. i really don’t see what’s funny bucky.”

“you think just because the guy asked you to a dance, he suddenly changes his player ways. i think you forgot i use to be one of those guys. guys like that don’t fal for girls like you” he pauses. “all he wants is to get you under him and then he’s gonna hop to the next willing participant. god you’re so naive.” you crossed your arms. “you’re such a jerk james! at least he has the decency to not play with my feelings! you’re sister was right! you’re nothing but a-an…asshole.” you yell, leaving the truck with a slam of the door. you surprised yourself at how you went off on him, what did he know about steve. you knew being involved with bucky was bad but now you officially got your sign to stay away from him.

you walked into the school looking for steve. you pushed pass people grinding and dancing on each other. when you find steve you see he’s not alone, he was dancing with lila miller. the two were close together, you turn you back in disgust once you catch the two of them share a very tongue-filled kiss. you sit at the table in annoyance. of course bucky would be right about steve, you hated the fact that he was right.

it took an hour and a half for steve to find you sitting at the table, watching everyone have fun. “hey y/n sorry i was waiting for you but then the guys wanted to go take some shots in the bathroom.” steve leans over to kiss your lips but you dodge him. he looks at you with a confused face. “come on let’s go dance.” he offers you his hand, you play with the fork that was covered in strawberry cake. “i’m good, maybe you should go dance with lila instead.” you say. steve sits back down in the chair, he cleared his throat. “you saw that? i didn’t think you’d be mad, it’s not like we’re together or anything.”

you roll your eyes, pushing your plate away from you. you get up and begin walking to the double doors. as you enters the hallways you ignore steve calling your name. “y/n! can you just wait a minute!” he yells, pulling your arm back causing you to hault. “it was just a dance, i was being nice. you can’t just get mad at me like that, i asked you to be my girlfriend more than once and you said no.”

“because all you want from me is sex which is not ready to give to you. you don’t think i hear about you hooking up with girls in the gym closet. i don’t want to be the next dumb girl who becomes a play thing for you.” you snap on him. “oh come on, sex is just sex, why do you make such a bug deal over this?” he groans.

“it’s not just sex steve, i want it to be meaningful and memorable. i’m sorry if i don’t want to hook up in a sleezy hotel.” you yell, your faces were extremely close. “and you think barnes is gonna make it special? god you’re so naive.” you furrow your brows, what did bucky have to do with this situation. “he has nothing to do with this steve! you asked me to come to this dance with you only for you to dance with another girl and make me look dumb sitting there waiting for you. you can’t take your hotel invite and shove it up your ass.” you walk away from steve, this time he didn’t bother calling your name. after he heard you curse at him he knew you guys were not going to work this out

you sit on the stairs of the school, tears slowly slid from your eyes. you felt so stupid and used, you knew steve was right but it still hurt. you two weren’t together and if he wanted to take another girl to the hotel he could because you weren’t together. you cringe at how bucky was right about steve, you wanted to be angry at him but he did warn you.

you decide to head home, walking alone the lonesome streets of brooklynn. you were wet due to the copious amount of rain fall, you shiver once more and continue to walk to your house. you noticed a familiar truck driving beside you. bucky rolls down his window. “get in.” he tells you. you continue walking, deciding to ignore the older boy. “come on doll it’s raining. a pretty girl like you shouldn’t be walking alone.” you couldn’t believe he as trying to flirt with you right now. you were hurt by his words and you were standing your ground, well that was until you heard a loud crack of lightning. you quickly rushed into the truck, slamming the door behind you.

before bucky could speak you began to talk. “just because i’m sitting in here with you, doesn’t mean i forgive you.” you seethed. bucky nods at you. “okay.” you angrily slap his arm. “okay? are you serious right now? how about a sorry for being a jerk!” you yell at him. bucky doesn’t acknowledge you, he starts looking for something in his truck. “god! boys are stupid! all you do is crave sex and hurt girls!” you rant, arms crossed over your chest. once you finished your rant you peek over at bucky holding two blunts. “wanna get high?”

you later found yourself in bucky’s room, high as a kite. you didn’t know what effect he had on you but you gave into his temptation. you sat on his bed, letting him shotgun smoke onto your mouth. “god you’re so hot.” bucky kisses your right shoulder. you softly hum in response, he trails his kisses to your exposed neck. you knew this was wrong on so many level but it felt so right.

“kiss me.” you whisper against him. the drugs in your system had your hormones at an all time high, you needed him to touch you. bucky locks his lips with yours, tongue roaming each other’s mouth in such a sensual way. bucky’s hand roams your body, cupping your breasts then your neck. you moan as he applies pressure to your throat.

he slides down you dress straps, with every kiss and touch you felt your dress being pulled lower and lower. bucky lifts you up on his lap, helping you out of the green champagne dress. you were fully exposed to him, his large hands grope your ass. he slaps the soft skin sending your lower half to grind against his tight jeans. bucky groans, pulling you closer to his bottom half. you felt the jean material rub against your clothes clit, your body shakes at the new feeling. “god you have no idea what you do to me princess.” he moans into your neck. his right hand unhooks your bra, you let the bra fall off of you. bucky eyes your bare chest, his blue eyes darken filling with lust.

he pulls your breast into his mouth, twirling his tongue around your swollen nipple. you grip onto his shirt, when moves your ass back and forth on his pants. “p-please bucky.” you whine, your body was aching for him to touch you. “what do you want doll?” you grab his, guiding him to your clothed cunt. you slip his hand under you, allowing his to grope your pussy. your mouth gapes open when bucky slowly rubs your clit back and forth.

when he notices you like the feeling of him touching you, it sends him into a deep lustful trance. he flips you over, bucky’ dog tags dangle over you. he kisses between your breast, trailing down to your stomach then he comes in contact with your laced white panties.

you can feel his breath on your wet core. he inhales you, moaning as if your cunt was the drug he was addicted to. he removed your panties from your body, bucky’s cock hardens once he caught a look at your pussy, your cunt was glistening from how wet it was, it took everything in bucky not to dive right in. “your so wet for me baby, and i haven’t even touched you yet. your pussy is begging for me to devour it.” bucky taunts. he slips one finger in your folds, your back arches at the finger passes your clit.

“bucky…please. i’ll do anything.” you beg. bucky perks an eyebrow at you. “anything?” you nod vigorously. “you’re going to cum for me three times. understand?” you nod your head. bucky licks a stride up your cunt. he moans at the taste of you. bucky wraps his pink lips around your clit, your legs spread wide as you beg for him to devour you. your back arches more, his hands pin your waist down to keep you steady, you screw your eyes shut as he sucks your clit into his mouth softly.

you moan out in pleasure, letting your hands grip his soft brown hair. you tug on his roots, attempting to push him closer to you. bucky pulls away earring a whine from you, he slips his middle finger into your core. at first his movements were slowly, he was preparing before adding his ring finger. you rode his fingers, moaning as he pumped you. you watch as he spits on your core, watching his saliva mix in with your cunt. you felt your stomach tighten, bucky felt your pussy clench around his fingers, imagining you around his cock.

he wastes no time, diving into your pussy. his tongue rapidly worked your clit, his fingers pumping you at a fast pace. your body was overwhelmed by all the stimulation. “bucky!” you scream at the top of your lungs. you were now grinding against his face, he didn’t tease you anymore, now he was on a mission to give you your orgasm. your legs shake, you cry out for bucky, your toes curled and your back arches to its full extent. bucky slows his movements as you come down from your high.

you collapse on his bed, you shiver as you feel bucky remove his hand from your pussy. you try to catch your breath, bucky hovers over you. “who knew my babydoll had that in you.”

[diabolikpersonals]

I'm here to "bless" you with more Shuuma scenarios, so what if Shu accidentally made Yuma real sad maybe even cry (like they're were arguing and Yuma got a bit too frustrated or Shu accidentally said something that hurt Yuma a bit too much *gasp* maybe accidentally said something bad about his scars, Idk why would he do that but sometimes things just slip) now Shu has a sad Yuma and three mad Mukamis after him. What will he do? Since we all know that he really isn't the best at apologizing or it might take him a lot of time and all his pride away. Will he just drop his all pride apoligize (I mean he would do that for Yuma, right?), comfort Yuma and still get AT LEAST THE Death talk from the Mukamis OR will he pull it off as he usually does and not apologize but get attacked by the three mad Mukamis and make Yuma REALLY sad *gasp again* maybe even a bit insecure? ("what if I'm just not good enough to apologize from" or "He actually meant what he said/did he feels that way and maybe he is right) DISCUSS..

(also sorry if there are grammar mistakes English is not my first language)

OHHH shu apologizing to yuma??? anon you've picked a great topic!!!

you've touched on stuff that's happened in canon so if anybody is curious, I recommend yuma's LE route and the shu vs yuma cd! for all your "shu makes yuma upset and then tries his best to apologize" needs :) yuma even cries!

this is a very relevant thing that happens to shu and yuma frequently! shu, in his mind, has had a lot to feel apologetic for. he spends a lot of time feeling deeply guilty, but it's not really as simple as apologizing most of the time. for one thing, shu often feels that he can make up for the suffering he caused yuma by avoiding him (so he can't hurt yuma again!!) or torturing himself (he attracts yuma's hatred on purpose, because he thinks he deserves it!!). of course, we know these aren't good apologies, and yuma knows that too! I think yuma's tried to rid shu of these habits, but that's not so easy either

I'll point to some healthier apology attempts from shu, too, so you know that he really means it and he's trying: in LE, he does his best to revive the flowers in Eden's garden for yuma. and in the shu vs yuma cd, he tries to apologize using words! this only doesn't work because yuma cuts him off before he can finish.

...which is why there's an extra layer of difficulty to apologizing! yuma often just doesn't want to hear it!

I think there's complicated reasons for this. yuma is really frustrated by how guilty shu feels, in a way. yuma feels as if he's a new person now—Yuma Mukami rather than edgar—and he'd rather that shu recognize him as Yuma Mukami. this means letting go of the past and all the guilt in it, which is difficult for shu to do (I mean, he spent hundreds of years being guilty!!). at our current point in the dialovers story, yuma's already forgiven all that stuff anyway, so he says.

the good news is that yuma tends to just forgive people on his own. you'd be so surprised. I'm especially thinking of shu's LE route when reiji made this big deal of atoning for the horrible things he did to yuma and yuma's like "what the fuck are u talking about, I already forgave u for that" LMAO

OKAY........now that I'm done talking about canon...............

in the scenario ur describing, I think if shu made yuma cry, he'd start by giving him lots of space. I said that nicely, but really what I mean is that he'd avoid him. and go mope in bed forever. then he'd get hella yelled at by the rest of the mukamis, like "DUDE go talk to our brother right now!!!!!" but shu would rather, um, find something he can do rather than something he can say.

when shu's finally ready to make the big brave step of apologizing rather than running away, I think yuma would wave it off. change the subject quick. act like nothing happened. it's less awkward like that, right? it's embarrassing that he cried anyway, so forget it.

but I really like ur idea!! that even if yuma goes "eh, I'm over it" he's actually, deep down, still feeling hurt and insecure!!!! and right now they're in the middle of this misunderstanding where, like, shu can't apologize and yuma can't accept an apology!

in the end, I want to have faith in shu and believe that he'll get to the heart of the problem. he'll address the actual hurt that he caused yuma instead of just avoiding him, and he'll put real effort into something that will appropriately make up for it. and it'll be something that yuma has no choice but to accept. (I'll point to the "making flowers bloom" scene in LE, since it was so beautiful and so fitting :'D)

...then I think yuma will cry again ^^ but not out of sadness or hurt this time. he just didn't realize how badly he needed this. it's not always good to just brush things off when you've been hurt. then when he says "I forgive you" it means way more.

[tinyboxxtink]

"Spring Break 86" *Chapter 17*

Chapter 16

Chapter 18

Funny story:

This was supposed to go up two days ago, but adult life happened and I couldn't do it Saturday, and I worked all day today.

But it's here!

I heard ya'll, you do NOT Like Y/N being a villain!

Also-- IDK if anyone know who "Evil Lady" is, but it's how I picture Y/N In "Villain Era"

---------------

“Y/N, What are you doing?!” Dustin yelled angrily. 

Lucas trying to reach Max, who was writhing and howling in pain from her two broken limbs. One of which you had just caused. 

“Oh wah wah wah,” you rolled your eyes. “Zoomer’s hurt and her little bard is distraught. You’re fucking KIDS,” 

“Y/N!” 

“You don’t know what love is, do you get that? Stupid idiotic god damn teenagers thinking they know what love is when clearly they don’t--”

“Yeah, you’re tellin’ me,” Eddie speaks up, making you look at him in shock. 

“....Yeah, i guess so,”

“Dude what are you doing?!” Steve yelled down to him. “Don’t piss her off more!”

“Ah, Harrington,” Vecna chuckled, looking up at him. “Quite the delicious morsel you are,” 

“Sorry, I don’t go for psychopathic freaks,”

“Yes I know,” he looks at you. “That’s Y/N’s department,” 

“Hey!” Both you and Eddie yell in offense, then look at each other. For half a second you both want to run to each other, forget all of this and just make up. But as fleeting as the emotion was, soon it was gone. 

“He means meal wise, Harrington,” You spit, knowing what Vecna’s thinking at all times now. It was like you were both in each other’s heads now, a mind meld made in hell. 

“What?”

“Mmmmm yes, all that guilt,” 

W-What?

“Oh don’t even pretend to act surprised, Steven,” you rolled your eyes. “So many years of being such a DICK to people, especially women,”

Steve looks down in shame, knowing exactly what you’re talking about.

“Hey! Steve!” Nancy reaches for him. “Don’t let her get in your head, okay? You’re not that guy anymore,” 

“Oh right, Nancy Drew here would stick up for him, wouldn’t she?” you laughed. “Before you do that though dear you should know you weren’t the first girl he de-folowered,” 

“....What?”

“Oh come on Nance,” you chuckled. “You didn’t think you were special, did you?” 

Nancy looks at Steve who has an incredibly guilty look on his face. 

“I bet you thought he was a virgin too, didn’t you?” you smirked. 

“Well, no, but--” Nancy starts in a small voice, but stops and glares at you. “No, I’m not letting you get inside my head like that, you bitch,”

“OOOOOOOHHHHHHHH,” Vecna drags out the word in a singsong voice. “Little Nancy Wheeler, quite the potty mouth on you now, hmm? Who knew?” 

“Shut up,” Nancy growls.

“Let’s talk about your guilt then, shall we?” 

“Oh come on papa,” you roll your eyes. “The Barb thing has been done to death,” 

“Oh, but it’s deeper than that, Y/N,” He smirks, looking at a nervous Nancy. 

“Oh?” you raised a curious eyebrow while glancing at her. 

“It’s really the shame of that fact that….you don’t feel guilty about Barb at all, do you Nancy?” 

“W-What?” Nancy shakes her head. “Of COURSE I do!” 

“Mmmm, I don’t think so, no,” Vecna chuckles. “I think you think it’s unfair that Barb had to go and get herself killed on the best night of your life,” 

“OOOOOHHHH,” You mimic his voice. “Interesting,”

“No!” She waves her hands frantically. “I don’t feel like that….anymore,” 

“Anymore,” you rolls your eyes with a small evil chuckle. 

“Hey!” Leave her alone!” Robin yells. 

“Ohhh yes,” your evil grin widens as you look at Robin. “Robin Buckley, resident lesbian of the Scooby gang,”

Everyone minus Steve and Eddie gasp; Robin’s mouth falls open. 

“You said--” She says softly, tears in her eyes. “You said that was safe with you,”

“Yeah well I said a lot of things, didn’t I?” You scoff. “Like how you’re gonna find someone someday? Lie. I was just trying to be nice. 

You’re never going to find someone, Robin. Y’know why? Because you’re ashamed. You think it’s some dirty secret, you have to hide.! How do you expect anyone to love you if you don’t love yourself, hmm?”

“HEY,” Steve barked at you. “That’s enough, Y/N,” 

“Actually I think it was going quite well,” Vecna smirked. “I can feel the shame and guilt oozing out of all three of you now. But why stop there?” 

He turns his gaze to Max and Lucas. 

“Come on man,” Lucas whines. “She’s already in enough pain,” 

“Yeah, that is true, papa,” 

“Oh now you feel remorse, Y/N?” He gave you a look. “I do believe you were the one who just snapped her arm in two,” 

“Well, yeah but--” You wavered. Vecna could see the flicker of guilt in your eyes, he had to stop this. 

“Well maybe we move on to Munson, hmm?” 

“What?” You turn to Eddie, who has an equally horrified look on his face.

“No,” you shook your head. “No you said--”

“I said he could live, Y/N,” He crosses his arms. “I didn’t say he wouldn’t get tortured,” 

“T-Tortured?”  you whimpered.

“Oh, I misspoke,” Vecna steps towards you, putting his hands on your shoulders from behind you. 

“All i meant was he should pay for what he put you through, don’t you think?”

“The pain i put HER through?!” Eddie scoffs with a laugh, flicking something in you to the ON position. 

“See?” Vecna catches this flash of anger, nurturing it quickly. “He doesn’t care what he did to you, he only expects you to feel guilty for what he thinks you did,” 

“What--No!” Eddie suddenly realizes whats happening. He shouldn’t have opened his mouth. 

“He doesn’t care how he broke your heart that day, that day you wanted to proclaim your love to him,” 

“Stop…” 

“You were going to give up EVERYTHING for him. He was your entire world, didn’t you say that?” 

“W-What?”

“Tell him, Y/N,” Vecna says softly in your ear. “Tell him what you told Nancy,” 

As if being a machine turned on, your eyes went glassy and you repeated the monologue you had given Nancy like reciting lines in a play.

“Eddie was the same as my mother, it seemed like. You know, he went to high school a whole year before me. I was alone in that junior high for a whole year. And he had– He had been my entire world,” 

“Oh God…” Eddie whispered, not wanting to hear this. Not wanting to drudge up the guilt he had for giving her up. 

“So I had no choice but to…’adapt. I started getting good grades, I started joining clubs, I thought that by the time I met up with Eddie he’d be the same and we'd be together again but– By the time I was a freshman he just wasn’t…Eddie, anymore,” 

“No…” he shook his head, not wanting to hear it, seeing tears drip down your stoic face. 

“He had made friends with all of these stoners, who only wanted to get high and play D&D. That’s it. No ambition, no dreams. Just weed and RPG’s. And it scared the shit out of me! He was just like my mother, like– everyone else, telling me the world doesn’t give a shit about you, so why should you give a shit about it?”

Tears started streaming down your face, even though you were still in a trance-like state. It was very disconcerting to watch.

“And then, it made me try harder,” you became angry. “Now I had two people to convince: my mother, and Eddie. My mother might have been a lost cause, but I thought-- I don’t know if I– got to some point high enough, then maybe he’d– he’d…get his shit together,”

“No,” he shook his head harder, getting angry. He wasn’t sure whether it was at himself, you or Vecna, but he was fuming.  

“No, that is NOT what it was supposed to do, Y/N. The whole point of ‘giving you up’ was so that you WOULDN’T have to…’take care’, of me. Why don’t you get that?!”

“But apparently, all I did was shove him deeper and deeper into the belief that he was no good, and never would be. And now he’s just given up completely!”

“THAT’S NOT YOUR FAULT, Y/N!!” He ran over and tried shaking your shoulders to ‘wake you’, but you continued your robotic speech. 

“So maybe…I don’t know, maybe my mom’s right,” You finally finished, Vecna conveniently leaving out the part where you were worried about being killed by him. 

Your eyes slowly returned to normal, looking Eddie in the eyes. His face was relieved, glad you were you again.

Or so he thought. 

It was like something in you had been awaken from that trance, like you had been shoved down and the angry, bitter you emerged to the surface.

“You,” you shoved him off. “You did this,” 

“W-What?” His face went from ecstatic to terrified once again. “NO! Princess I--”

“NO!!!!!” You bellowed, your voice emitting some sort of shock wave. It passed through Eddie like lightning, knocking him to the ground. 

“You pushed me away,” angry tears started to form as you advanced towards him. “You, you became so fucking self indulgent and self involved with your stupid ass games and your weed. That’s ALL you cared about!”

“Th-That’s not true,” he whimpered, trying to get back up. “You know that’s not true--”

“I had to go through my best friend-- my entire world, just shoving me away like I was garbage, and it wasn’t even my fault!!!”

“I know, Princess,” He crawled towards you, tears dripping down his face. “I know, and I’m sorry. I didn’t think--”

“Yeah that’s your problem, Munson,” you growled. “You don’t fucking think about anyone else but yourself,”

“That’s bullshit!” Eddie yelled angrily. “Y/N I have tried dying on you, MULTIPLE times. For YOU. Shit, I just ACTUALLY died!”

“I DIDN’T ASK YOU TOO!!!!” You screamed back. “You-- you left me, AGAIN. You DIED. You-- you took yourself from me, and once again I didn’t do anything to deserve that!” 

“How are you turning my act of love into some--- nefarious thing, Y/N”

“Big word for a three time senior,” You smirked. 

“Bitch,” Eddie blurted out. He hadn’t mean to be so harsh, but he was pissed already and you knew how to bring out the worst in him.

“Oooooooh!!!!!” Vecna laughed evilly. “Now the big man’s showing his true colors, isn’t he-- Princess?” 

“DON’T,” Eddie clenched his fists. “Don’t you fucking call her that. That is not your name for her,” 

“And it’s not yours either,” You spoke up. 

“W-What?” He gasped softly. “No, Princess come on--”

“DON’T fucking call me that,” you growled, getting up in his face while he was still on his knees. “You will never call me that again, do you fucking understand me?”

“NO, I don’t,” he pulled himself to his feet, grabbing your shoulders. “You are my Princess, Y/N. You always have been. Please, hear me. I know the real you is in there somewhere, and I know she knows how much I love her. How much I’ve always loved her,”

He moves both hands to your face. 

“Please, baby,” he begs you, his voice trembling. “Please fight this. I can’t lose you, not again,” 

“Not again,” You roll your eyes with a sad laugh, looking to the sky. “Not again?! WHO’S FAULT IS THAT?!”

“M-Mine, but--”

“I loved you, Eddie. Do you get that? I loved you so completely and with my entire being. But i was terrified to say anything because at least having you as a friend I could…’keep’ you,”

“Y/N…”

“Do you know how much courage it took for me to go to your house that day? Do you know how fucking long I stood in your driveway, just talking to myself? Trying to convince myself that if I laid it all out on the table, that it would-- somehow, bring you back to me?”

“Baby, I’m--”

“And then you YELLED AT ME!” You start to cry again. “You yelled at me, and made me feel like I did something wrong for loving you!!!!”

“I know,” he tightened the hands around your face, still crying himself. “I know, and I will never forgive myself for that, okay? But it’s over, it doesn't matter--”

“DOESN’T MATTER?!” You screamed, shoving him off of you. 

All of a sudden, your eyes glossed over once again. But this time, they were black. All black, like you had completely been lost and the demon had taken over.

“Oh now I do want you to suffer, Munson,” 

“Wha--- Aw shit no--” Eddie groans.

You held out one of your hands and started to clench it, causing Eddie’s throat to tighten. 

“No--” Eddie whimpered, his hands immediately going to his neck, as if he could pry your invisible grip on him.

“Y/N!!!!!” Dustin yelled. “Y/N DON’T DO THIS!!!!!!!”

“Oh right,” You turned to face him. “The annoying little brother,” 

“What?” Dustin gasped in horror. “No! Eddie and I are the only reason you’re like this, Y/N! Remember that?” 

“How could I forget, Dusty Buns?” You chuckled evilly. “You two have caused me the most suffering,” 

“Whatt-- NO!” Steve yelled from up above. “No! Leave Dustin alone! He hasn’t done anything wrong, Y/N!”

“ACTUALLY Harrington,” you turn to him. “You’re proving my point right now,”

“What?” Steve furrowed his eyebrows.

“You HAVE an older sibling, Dustin!!!” You stepped towards him. “Or did you forget that? You’re---you had the audacity to replace me with Steve “The Hair” Harrington? REALLY?!”

“I wasn’t trying to replace you, Y/N!” Dustin yelled. “But-- you were GONE. You’ve BEEN gone, even when you were here!” 

“Oh now you try and guilt trip me, huh little brother?” you scoff.

“I’m not-- I’m not trying to guilt trip you, I’m just trying to get you to understand---”

“Understand WHAT, Dustin?!” You cut him off angrily. “Understand that you went through hell and back again, and you chose Steve The--”

“Can we not use the nickname, please?” Steve asked. 

“...Harrington,” you growled. “You chose HIM to go to battle with? And then THIS loser?!” You gestured to Eddie who was still in your light choke hold. 

“YOU WEREN’T AROUND!”

“I WOULD HAVE BEEN, DUSTIN!!!!!!” you screeched. 

“Do you really think that if-- if you had said something after Will ‘supposedly’ died, that I wouldn’t have been there for you? 

“I mean, maybe--” 

“You didn’t trust me enough to let me! Your own FUCKING sister!!!!” Your decibels didn’t lower. 

“I didn’t bring him into it, Nancy did!” Dustin gestured to Nancy. 

“Y-You just…you closed off, and I let you. And then to come find out you not only opened up to this douchebag, but now you fucking WORSHIP him?!” you growled.

“I do not--” Dustin started to deny it.

“Ohhhhhhh do not even,” You wagged a finger. “Do not even try and bullshit me Dustin. I see how you look and act around him, like he’s a fucking superhero. He’s NOT, by the way. He’s a narcissistic, shallow, selfish ASSHOLE--”

“HE IS NOT!!!!!!!” Dustin was now screaming over you.

“See?” You laugh bitterly. “You run to his fucking defense. But you don’t know him like I do, do you?”

“You don’t know him like I do, Y/N!” Dustin yelled. “He’s changed!” 

“Oh I’m sure,” you rolled your eyes.

Suddenly, Vecna reacts to something, as if he’s being summoned. You feel it too, but you can’t make out what it is. Vecna however, seems to recognize it immediately.

“Hmm, seems we have a visitor, Maxine,” he chuckles. “Come, don’t want to keep her waiting,”

He snaps his fingers and Max goes into her trance like state, before he turns to you.

“I can count on you to finish these peons off, right my pet?”

“Yes, papa,” You nodded sweetly.

“Good,” he snaps his fingers and he and Max disappear. As soon as they’re gone, the remaining four drop to the floor of the trailer, and Eddie’s choke hold is released. 

Eddie immediately takes the opportunity to grab you by the shoulders, looking into the deep black holes where your eyes should be. 

“Jesus fuck…” he mutters, tears coming to his eyes. “Y/N? Baby? Can you hear me?” 

You shove him off with superhuman strength, then clench your fists. As you do, everyone in the trailer begins to choke. 

“I’ve had it with all of you….” You growl, looking straight ahead into nothingness. 

“NONE of you deserve happiness. NONE of you deserve to live,” You’re about to crush everyone’s windpipes with a flick of your wrist when you hear a small voice next to you.

“...I can’t fight this…feeling, any…longer,” Eddie chokes, trying desperately for you to hear him. 

Your head turns, the black in your eyes has blinded your vision.

“Don’t…” you growled, hearing the others struggling to breathe.

“And yet I’m still afraid…to let it show,” He sings louder. 

“STOP,” You growl harder, stepping towards where the voice is coming from. 

“What started out-- as-- friendship--” He chokes, your grip on everyone’s throat tightens as you rage inside. 

You can feel the true you fighting back, your eyes flash to normal, to black, to normal, to black. 

“Has grown stronger--” your voice comes out softly, almost against your will. Like the true you was breaking through. 

“I only wish I had the strength to let it show,” 

“Baby come on--” Eddie grunts. “Fight it, fight for us,” 

“And…I can’t…” You hold your head, your eyes flashing back and forth more rapidly. 

“I can’t…Eddie,” You whimpered. 

“You can, Y/N,” He could feel the grip on his neck loosening.  

He continued to sing to you: “And even as I wander, I’m keeping you in sight,”

“You’re a--” You grunted, your knees started to shake. 

“Candle in the window, on a cold dark winter’s night,” He sang back, reaching for you but you kept him far enough away from you he was having difficulty. 

“And I’m getting closer than I ever thought I might…” he hopped forward, finally grabbing one of your arms. 

Your eyes flicker to normal as Eddie pulls you into him, his choke hold being released. He sings the last line to you, and only the real you.

“And I can’t--” 

You put a hand to his lips, wanting to sing to him back as yourself, but you felt super weak.

“...Fight this feeling anymore, You slur, as you fall to the ground unconscious. Once you do, everyone else is released from their choke hold. 

“Y/N?” Eddie grabs you and sits down on the floor with your head in his lap. “Y/N? Baby?” 

No response.

“Baby, come on don’t do this. Not now,” he whimpers, stroking your blank face.

“Come back to me,” he whispers. 

The rest of the group is recovering, all talking to each other, checking on one another. Dustin quickly runs over to Eddie holding you. 

“Eddie,” he starts to cry. “Is she…?” 

“I don’t know…” Eddie started to cry himself, looking at him.

Suddenly, you began to stir in his arms.  

“Baby?” Eddie shook you softly as your eyes started to flutter open.

“Eddie…?” You looked up at him, tears coming to your eyes immediately as you started to remember what happened. 

“Y/N!” Dustin exclaimed happily, hugging you as you sit up. You hug him back softly, still holding Eddie’s hand. 

“I’m--I’m so sorry,” You whisper to the two of them, before looking at the rest of them. “I’m sorry to all of you,” 

“It’s okay baby,”  He pulled you close. “It wasn’t you,” 

“It was, though,” you bit your lip looking up at him. “I mean…it was stuff I thought,” 

“...Really?” Dustin asks in a hushed voice.

“REALLY?” Steve stomps over. “So you really think that shit about Robin?

“No!” You shook your head, giving Robin an apologetic look. “Not…really,” 

“WOW,” Robin scoffs. “Wow,” 

“Oh come on Robin, you know what i meant,” you tried to defend yourself.

“Do I?!” She yelled angrily. “I know you just fucking outed me!” 

“Oh to who, Max and Lucas?” You roll your eyes.

“Y/N!” Eddie hits you.

“I’m sorry,”  you apologize to her.

“See, she’s still under his spell,” Nancy gestures towards you.

“No she’s--” Eddie stops. “Are you?” 

“What?” your eyebrows furrowed.

“Still connected to Vecna,”’ Eddie said.

“I….” You closed your eyes. You could see Vecna, standing in a gym decorated for a dance. A banner read “SNOW BALL”.

“Yes,”  you nodded, eyes still closed.

“...Do you still have his power?” Nancy asked.

You looked over and clenched your fist at Steve. He started to gag, and you released quickly.

“Yup,” you shrugged.

“Jesus,” Steve muttered. “Thanks a lot,” 

“Sorry,” you blushed.

“So-- theoretically, you can kill him,” Nancy pointed out.

“WHAT?” Eddie gasped.

“I mean, help eleven at least,” Robin added.

“Nah nah nah nah,” Eddie waved his hands. “They’re psychically linked. What if when Vecna dies, she dies,”

“We don’t know that will happen,” Nancy speaks up.

“Yeah, you would--” You stop yourself, you know it’s not yourself.  

“See?!” She’s having none of it. “We don’t know if or when Vecna could just-- take full control of her and kill us all!”

“But what if she can help amp El’s powers? I mean, Vecna/Henry/One is a number, so they should have similar powers, right?”

“No,” Eddie stands in front of you. “No more using the girlfriend, do you hear me?”

“You better tell Vecna that,” Eddie scoffed.

“Baby they’re right,” you put your hands on his face. 

“The fuck they are!!” Eddie yelled.

“Look Eddie,” You made him look at you. “I just almost killed everyone in this room, i think I need to do damage control.”

“But that wasn’t--” he starts.

“Doesn’t matter,” you stopped him.

“If I can help kill this asshole, he won’t bother ANY Of us again. And I’ll be free,” you rubbed his cheek with your thumb.

“Don’t you want that?”

“...Yes,” He put his hands over yours still on his face.

“Alright let’s do it,” You nod at the rest of them, who nod in agreement.

This would be totally easy…right?

-------------

Support me on Ko-Fi if you like what you read!

@neenieweenie 

@loliakeoghan23

@rexorangecouny

@sugabops

@llanababy

@broccolisoepj

@Fangirling-4-ever

@nostandards94

@adrienette715

@uglynuggy45

@nightless

@bilbobag9ins

@hellfire-club

@buckys2thicc

@iluminsz

@10blurredsmoke10

@wallylays

@cathybara

@fancytragedything

@westyywifee

@stitchattacks

@tubble-wubble

@ohashley101

@Faithsreades

@ellis04

@girl-in-green

@takemetoneverland420

@karissssssssssssssss

@ches65

@fionnthebandersnacc

@yesimalittlepenguin-blog

@daffodil0darling

@alex-nicole42

@bobabitch88

@rachelsteapot

@jullamy

@jokerslabyrinth

@taramaria

@kiszkawagnerwhore

@returnoftheborle

@lunaqveen

@butterfly-lies-chase-them-away

@wanniiieeee

@comic-wanda

@spacedaddydinn

@dazedshoon

@mayahfig4

@lemonboy011

@bluejaysaysstuff

@michele131

@akitoxx

@yoyonanaria

@girl-ln-green

@xbreezymeadowsx

@moonbeampillgoth

[trashytummiez]

hunger fic where yuu listens to idia's tummy and then she feeds him and listens to his tummy again when its full?

*GOOOOOUUUUUURRMBLE!*

Poor Idia grimaced uncomfortably when his tummy gave an incredibly loud growl. The dorm leader was so fixated on his gaming session that he forgot to eat and now his tummy was going to remind him whether he liked it or not.

"Nnnngh sooo hungry," whined the fiery haired teenager. He wrapped his arms around his stomach while it kept grumbling away noisily.

"Wow I thought that was a bear," Yuu's voice called out.

The startled Idia yelped like a frightened puppy not expecting his girlfriend to already be in his dormroom. "Wh-When did you get in?"

"Just now. You probably didn't hear me come in over the sound of your stomach," Yuu teased.

Idia whimpered and cringed at the same time when his tummy gave another uproarious grumble. Yuu sat the anxious boy down onto his couch and gently put her hand on his flat rumbling tummy. Idia covered his eyes with his oversized hoodie sleeves whimpering some more. Yuu just giggled and gave his tummy a few teasing pats.

"I ordered takeout for us...mostly you so that should solve this," Yuu said.

Idia's stomach sounded like it was snarling at her for not doing that sooner.

Curious she leaned her head down and put her ear against his stomach. Idia looked down at his girlfriend and tapped his index fingers timidly. "...C-Can't you hear my tummy clear enough with how noisy it is...?"

"You know me," Yuu said like that was all the explanation she needed.

Technically it was. Yuu's fetishes were not unknown to Idia in the least. It was one of the biggest open secrets on campus in fact. Others were far more keen to tease Yuu's fetish but Idia was way too shy to try a lot of the times.

Fortunately he still managed whether he tried to or not.

Yuu continued listening to Idia's stomach grumbling away. It bubbled sharply like liquids being sucked away from the very depths of his stomach.

To help calm Idia's stomach down Yuu slid her hand under his big blue hoodie and started rubbing his bare tummy. Idia whined nervously when he felt her lithe little hand delicately stroking his soft pale flesh. He hated to admit how much he loved her touch but was also so unused to physical contact that it still made him incredibly nervous.

Her fingers gently rode up Idia's flat smooth stomach running circles across it and occasionally kneading into his delicate flesh. He bit his blue lips with his fangs both out of nervousness and pleasure. Especially when Yuu started to run her fingers across his belly button.

It also helped to ease the roaring from Idia's tummy too. His organ was still growling but much softer the more Yuu rubbed it.

What helped even more was the fast food Yuu ordered finally arriving. She got Idia an abundance of his favorite burgers and beverages. The timid and anxious boy quickly tore through his meal more voraciously than he cared to admit. Idia was incredibly hungry after all. Too hungry to be embarrassed by his far less than civil eating.

Yuu loved every second of it. She loved watching Idia's fangs tear through each burger and the sizable lumps that would squeeze down his pale slender throat. And the way he washed it all down by grabbing one of the two liter bottles she got him by bringing it up to his blue lips and sucking that beverage down made Yuu weak in the knees. She watched his Adam's Apple bob in and out while his throat rippled from gulping his soda down so fast and in such high quantity.

Not to mention how unbelievably gassy all that soda was making him combined with so much fast food festering in his increasingly swollen tummy. The more food Idia chomped down and the more soda he guzzled the bigger and rounder his tummy became. That bump beneath Idia's large hoodie stretched out against it more and more injunction with Idia's gluttony.

By the time idia was finished stuffing himself his belly was as big as a beachball. His hoodie actually rode up a little because he was too bloated to conceal it even with how large his hoodie was.

Idia moaned and slumped back against the couch with both hands rubbing his big round tummy. Yuu could hear everything in Idia's belly slosh from his movement.

"Faaaaaah...unnnngh I'm so fuuuull..." Idia moaned while his hands groggily rubbed over the round mass gurgling from his stretched out middle.

"Wow you were really hungry weren't you," Yuu marveled at the sight of Idia's big noisy belly.

Idia gave a really rich closed mouth burp that made him squint and stained both his and Yuu's cheeks with a blush. Just for very different reasons. Idia panted after and patted his belly while he blew the gas out of his mouth. "Ungh I guess my tummy was emptier than I thought..." Idia said with a soft hiccup.

Yuu leaned him back a little more and lifted the bottom of his hoodie and shirt up like she were lifting a curtain to reveal that big beautifully round tummy of his. Idia blushed immensely when yuu started fumbling with his pants. He whimpered and looked away humming some anime theme song to himself until Yuu undid his pants. His incredibly bloated tummy spilled forth with a heavy slosh to fill up the space and brought Idia such immediate relief he moaned heavenly.

"Oooooohhhh...ohhh that's so much better..." Idia moaned.

"I know," Yuu said and gave Idia's sizable tummy a teasing pat which made it wobble and caused the boy to hiccup again.

Yuu was too infatuated not to immediately start rubbing Idia's belly when she was close enough. She rubbed that heavily glutted tummy slowly and sensually. Her fingers kneaded across that thick yet smooth and oh so soft flesh sinking into it while she worked to settle the boys incredibly full belly.

She cupped into the sides of his ball-shaped tummy and used her thumbs to gently stroke that portion of flesh between Idia's stretched out belly and his hips. He was far too bashful and timid to admit how much he adored that feeling of Yuu's hands all over his stomach but he didn't need to. Not when Yuu probably loved fondling and rubbing his belly every bit as much as Idia loved being on the receiving end. Especially the way her palm ran over his belly button. Even as shy and anxious as Idia was that never failed to make the boy groan delightfully. Which was part of why Yuu always did it.

His big round tummy burbled heavily while his strong digestive system worked to break down such a remarkably heavy meal. It caused Idia's stomach to gurgle and churn very noisily almost like one of their potion classes they had together if one counted Idia's form of remote learning. And because he was already digesting so much of what he ate Idia's stomach had a soft jiggly quality to it.

This was something Yuu always loved about Idia's belly after a heavy binge. She cupped his immensely thick lower stomach and lifted it up. Idia's blush was intense when he saw the sheer infatuation and lust in Yuu's eyes when she scooped up his belly like that. She eagerly gave his belly a light jiggle which made everything digesting inside of him slosh even more heavily. Idia winced when all that sloshing started stirring the gas in his belly up his gullet. He held a fist against his dark blue lips and barely held back a considerable burp that rumbled heavily in his cheeks. Idia blushed and gave another longer closed mouth burp right after that.

The way the gas rumbled so hard in Idia's mouth always turned Yuu on especially with the strain on his face when he struggled to hold back. But she also really wanted to hear Idia let a good burp out so she teasingly released Idia's belly and let it basically flop down onto his lap with an intense slosh and jiggle. The thick sound of Idia's tummy basically slapping against his thighs was so satisfying to Yuu's ears.

But not nearly as satisfying as the thick burble that gurgled up Idia's throat. He winced and tried to hold it back with his hand clamped around his lips but there was just too much pressure to hold back. So Idia ended up letting out a loud throaty burp that pushed out of him heavily for a few seconds.

BBRRRAAAAAAAAAHHRRUUURRRUUUUUUUHHHPP!!!!

Yet again both Idia and Yuu were blushing heavily and yet again it was for completely different reasons.

"There you go just let it out," Yuu said and gave the side of Idia's belly a few especially hearty pats to make it slosh and jiggle with each pat and hopefully coax another one out.

And it did since her patting caused another hearty burp to roll out of Idia's mouth.

The boy huffed and covered his mouth in time to suppress another air bubble that was worming its way up his throat after that burp.

"...You enjoy this way too much," Idia whined softly.

"Guilty as charged," Yuu admitted shamelessly and drove her point home by really squeezing down on Idia's belly which forced a huge burp out of Idia's mouth that was bigger and longer than any others before it.

BBWWRRAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUURRRRRRRHHHAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRLLPPP!!!!!!!!!!!

It was such a massive burp that Idia was left out of breath when it finished. He slumped back and panted so heavily his rounded tummy rose and fell with each breath he gave.

"Fffrraaahh...ooohhhh...ungh that...that felt good..." he gasped out with his tongue out a little.

"Sounded even better," Yuu said and gave Idia's tummy another teasing pat. Idia hiccuped again and huffed after. There was clearly still more gas left in there but she'd hold off on pushing the rest out after the boy had some time to catch his breath.

Then Idia's tummy gave a thick groan.

*GllluuOOOOOoorrrrble!!!*

It sounded richer than the drier and more painful sounding rumbles it was giving before Idia ate.

Yuu rested her head against Idia's big belly with a fleshy bloated pillow. The added pressure against his stomach made Idia burp again but he was far too winded by that last record breaking eruption he gave to bother holding it in. Yuu's ear rested gently against Idia's round churning tummy nuzzling her cheek into his soft delicate flesh which made Idia giggle lightly from how ticklish his tummy was.

She just listened to it churn and burble deeply while his meal continued to be worked down.

"Mmmmm you're tummy sounds so happy right now," she observed with infatuation on her mind.

Despite his overstuffed state when Idia looked down and saw Yuu nestled up against his big tummy like that he couldn't help smile and drape an arm around his girlfriend. "With how much you fed it I'm not surprised," he said with another small giggle. Then he bit his lip again tentatively. "...Do you think you could keep rubbing my tummy a little bit more while you're down there?"

He could barely finish talking when Yuu got to work immediately stroking Idia's burbling tummy even more. Idia hummed happily and closed his eyes with an absolutely adorable smile on his face. Yuu caught a glimpse and felt her heart grow warmer at the sight.

It just reinforced what she always knew. Happiness was always just a full tummy away.

[anika-ann]

Just a Human (S.R.)

Type: mini-series turned one-shot, SHIELD recruit!reader

Pairing: Steve Rogers x reader     Word count: 8750

Summary: Being a SHIELD recruit was a dream come true, especially with people like Sergeant Barnes or Captain Rogers offering an input to your class’ training.

It was also hard work for many different reasons. One of them being all those guys around; not all of them were exactly fit to become heroes, simply because they were not good people.

Maybe you shouldn’t have pointed it out so openly though. Then again, what would the world turn into if you kept your mouth shut when feeling like speaking up?

WARNINGS: so-so graphic description of assault almost turned sexual, violence and a bit of blood, boys being boys in a real bad way, language

A/N: Steve Rogers vs assholes, round 2. Also, ‘you’ vs. assholes. And Bucky in the mix.

A/N: This was originally posted as a miniseries on AO3, but now edited, I decided to thrown it in as a long, sort-of three part one-shot. Enjoy and mind the warnings.

(gif source dailymcugifs, divider by firefly-graphics)

A Handful of Spite

“Can you believe the fucking nerve on him?!” Henry hissed, punching the bag harder and catching your attention. The statement was followed by his companion nodding grimly.

You tried to ignore the walking testosterone jerks; you never liked either Henry or Jim. The reason was simple – they were, as you loved to remind people, an advertisement on toxic masculinity. Bullies on top of that. The kind of people you wanted to avoid at all costs.

You weren’t that lucky to have that chance though.

So instead, you scoffed under your breath and continued your sit-ups series. You had more important things to do than wonder about what they were talking about this time.

It was your regular training session with the other SHIELD recruits led by Sergeant Barnes – which--- oh my. When joining the academy, you had no clue that the director’s ‘you’ll be learning from the best’ meant that of all things; trained by the more-than-once-believed-late James Buchanan Barnes. Everyone here knew his story – or at least some of it. The brainwashing. The murders. His heroics to make up for them as much as he could. His everlasting friendship and a nickname that was tied to it. Bucky; the very best friend of the oh-so-praised Captain America.

Oh, speaking of which, he joined the sessions too. You were being trained by not one, but two supersoldiers slash war heroes. You couldn’t believe this was your life sometimes, but you were not one to dwell on it. You just accepted it as a fact. An abso-fucking-lutely incredible fact.

“He’s just a fucker, man. Forget about Barnes, you have Cassie in your pocket. Just ‘cause he’s all sticky sweet on her doesn’t mean she’ll suck his-“

You made a disgusting face, pushing harder to tune out the conversation. You wanted to gag and at the same time, your blood was boiling.

Could there be a jerk who was objectifying women more than Jim? A guy who was using his lower brain more frequently than him? Doubtful. You really wanted to throw up at rubbish that was leaving his mouth.

Not to mention that he was throwing dirt on Sergeant Barnes who absolutely didn’t deserve it.

“-he’s like that to all of them. The chicks. And they fucking dig him, it’s disgusting. He makes the poor brainwashed kicked puppy face, reminding the sob story of his and they’re all dropping to their knees I swear…” Jim continued, practically spitting the venomous words.

You squeezed your eyes shut, half furious and half guilty; the sergeant did have a heart-breaking backstory and many girls were making eyes on him, their hearts softened by the tragedy and his bravery, yes. And you couldn’t say it wasn’t moving you as well, filling you with compassion – but compassion only. Obviously, Sergeant Barnes was objectively a very attractive man too, but what they were saying… ugh.

He didn’t deserve these insults; he was not trying anything on anyone, he wasn’t offering his ‘sob story’, actually being rather secretive about it for obvious and no doubt painful reasons. He couldn’t really couldn’t be blamed for the girls fawning over him a bit more because of it, could he? What was he supposed to do? Stop breathing? Stop doing what he chose to be his job?

It wasn’t his problem – and thank god for that – that these two assholes had egos the size of Texas and couldn’t handle a little competition.

Seriously. Walking testosterone-filled jerks. You seriously considered moving from the station you had been given, eyeing Captain Rogers, checking if he would notice.

“Well, he’s not. Getting. Any. From. My. Chick. Asshole!”

The bag swung wildly under Henry’s blows despite Jim holding it. You laid off, taking your fifteen second break.

“I bet he’s fucking them all on side. Always so… so soft on them. I bet he’s leaving all the hard shit for bed,” Jim snorted, somewhere between angry at him competition and amused at his own crude joke.

You were gonna puke. You were sure of it.

“And he’s too hard on us. Showing off for them. I would fucking want to see him holding up against us without that metal arm-“

You had enough. You sat up sharply, panting, your face flushed, unsure whether it was from the exercise or the exchange you were listening to.

“Are you serious?!” you hissed their way, earning their shocked glances.

And then, Jim’s face twisted in annoyance and disgust.

“Oh geez, you’re one of them, aren’t you?” he snarked, rolling his eyes. “The fangirls.”

More heat burned in your cheeks. You weren’t kidding anyone; both the sergeant and the captain had showed up in your not so innocent dreams, but you were only human, alright. There was only so much time you could spend with two very fine men like them in one room, a bit sweaty and rough (or just slightly gentler with the ladies) until your brain reacted. Mostly to the captain. Not the point.

But actually crossing the line? Being a part of the thing they were describing if it ever existed? Waiting in the line until one of them picked you for the evening with a promise to do it again after they… Jesus what, tried all the others? No, thank you. You had some dignity left.

Also, you simply couldn’t imagine them doing such thing. Raised in a different era, tried by war and pain and lost, yet remaining the great men they were? Just nope.

“No! Jesus, are you even listening to yourself?” you hissed, minding your volume. You hoped that the low hum of voice in the room, of others working out, giving each other pointers and the noise of the machines would offer you a cover from the rest of your companion.

“What, you wanna tell me they’re not going easy on you? On any chick, really?”

“Yeah, well, maybe because they don’t actually want to break our bones during training. Supersoldiers. Superstrength. Does that ring a bell?” you pointed out, reaching for your water bottle, hoping either of your trainers would forgive you when seeing you only took a sec to have a sip.

Henry scoffed, leaning onto the bag. “Sounds like someone has a crush…”

You couldn’t help the motion of your hands, inconspicuously throwing them in the air in frustration.

Why were you even speaking to them? You should have kept your mouth shut!

“Oh go to hell, Ulrich! You’re just jealous and scared that your girl whom you treat like a piece of shit will run off,” you murmured, wiping your forehead off sweat.

“Yeah, because they’re sure pulling their punches with guys too,” Jim complained again, rolling his eyes as Henry now watched you, eyes narrowed in anger – oh you hit a nail on the head, alright.

You couldn’t but mirror Jim’s action, deciding to stick to Devil’s advocate, because…. yeah, because it wasn’t fair to either Rogers or Barnes. They were good people and didn’t deserve this.

“So they’re not beating the shit out of us like they do with you, get over it.”

“They’re humiliating us! Showing off their big muscles, trying to impress all the chicks-“

You chuckled incredulously as they actually admitted the real reason behind their bitching so openly; as if you hadn’t known the whole time. Ego. Ohhh, the ego was bruised. Call 911, CPR is gonna be needed! God, how did they even live with ego this big? Compensating for something?

“They’re doing their job. Training. Yes, they go a bit harder on you, because your physiology can take it. Did it ever occur to you that they have bigger problems than entering a pissing contest with you just so they could steal the girls? Jeez… just… maybe try to be less of assholes and the girls will be into you too… ”

You missed the hard look Henry gave you, laying down again, this time on your belly to work on your back.

You wheezed when a knee suddenly dug into your back, violently and painfully knocking the air out of your lungs. Before you could react, one of your arms was twisted behind your back, Henry’s voice raspy right into your ear, low and dangerous.

“Listen, you little bitch, you don’t get to talk to me like that. Understand? Huh?”

He was so proving your point, but you didn’t have the time You tried to breathe in properly, and free your arm while pushing up on the free one, your muscles burning with the effort. Shit, he was heavy. You wheezed again instead of the answer.

“Can’t hear you, sweetie. What was that?”

Peripherally, you could see heavy boots approaching rapidly, making a quick guess of who that could be. You gritted your teeth, tears of humiliation pricking your eyes. You were not about to give Henry the satisfaction of proving his point of your trainers being sweet on all the girls even if this so wasn’t that.

“Screw. You,” you let out with the last oxygen left, grabbing his left calf and sharply tugging to the very same side. A half-second later when his weight of you eased just a fraction, you threw your body to the left as well, adding a jerk of your legs.

Both of you rolled over, him ending up under you and you quickly spun away, gasping, desperately fighting for air. As it burned your windpipe, it was as painful as welcomed. Little spots danced inf ornt of your eyes, but you quickly blinked them away – luckily for you, Henry didn’t dare to attack you again.

You shook your head before pushing to sit up, only to meet with Captain Rogers’s strict gaze.

“What the hell is going on in here?” he demanded, sharp blue eyes flickering between the three of you.

Maybe you were hallucinating, but he seemed to be murdering Henry with his eyes. Uh-uh. You would have been glad he was, hadn’t Henry been talking about favouritism only few moments ago. You pushed up simultaneously with him and you both stood straight, facing the captain.

“Apologies, sir,” you stated mechanically, his gaze immediately shifting to you. Your heart stopped. Oh wow, you would swear the blue of his irises was on fire. You gulped. “We had a slight disagreement with Mr. Ulrich. I’m aware I shouldn’t have been talking to him in the first place. I’ll take whatever punishment is given to me.”

“Yeah, I bet you’d liked taking a punishment from him, wouldn’t you…” Jim muttered under his breath, making your gut twist in disgust.

Was he ever not thinking about sex? You prayed the captain didn’t hear him and you had to stop yourself from shooting Jim a murderous glare.  

“I don’t think that’s necessary. Consider it a warning. Mr. Ulrich? You have something to add before you take a few laps?”

You could literally hear Henry’s blood boiling. You opened your mouth to ask for the same punishment, not wanting to have his point proved. You never got the chance to speak.

“No, sir. I only don’t understand why I’m the only one being punished,” Henry questioned innocently and you gritted your teeth.

Maybe because you attacked me, you dickhead?

Captain glared at him for a moment before his gaze shifted to Jim. “You’re not. Mr. Larkin is following your example.”

You pressed your lips together, this time to stop a smile threatening to spread on your lips. God, who knew America’s Golden Boy could get that sassy? You cleared your throat.

“If I might speak, sir, I deserve to run the laps as well,” you noted carefully, earning a curious expression from your superior. You could tell he wavered, a strange spark appearing in his eyes.

You desperately wanted him to let you run too even if you breathing was still a bit difficult; because otherwise Henry would be proved right. Yeah, nope.

“Very well, then. Ten laps around the gym, recruits. Then you move to the station free at the moment. Go. Don’t let it happen again.”

The three of you nodded dutifully and picked up a pace. For some reason, you could feel the captain’s eyes on you while he walked back to assisting his friend with hand-to-hand training. You glimpsed the sergeant leaning to him, probably asking what was that about, but the blond just shook his head.

Towards the eighth lap, you were being overpassed by Henry and Jim, who ran together; faster than you, whether you liked it or not.

“This isn’t over, bitch,” his hateful hiss reached your ears and you picked up speed stubbornly, not showing them that they might intimidate you even for a second.

They wished.

Even when leaving the room after the session was finished, you would swear there was a pair of blue eyes burning a hole to the back of your head. You hoped that you’d soon be free of the captain’s attention.

You sure didn’t want him to watch too closely. You didn’t need him behind your back to see mistakes you sometimes made just like anybody else. Also, it would be harder to admire and ogle him; you did that occasionally, okay. You were just a human, after all.

A Handful of Mistakes

Shauna, your roommate and bestie from science division of SHIELD, was very patient listening to your lament about guys being dicks; she was awesome like that.

So you vigorously vented your frustration with male population, rolled your eyes when mimicking the silent threat of ‘this not being over’, had a very unhealthy piece of cake at the cafeteria that afternoon and moved on.  

You should have known better.

Henry’s words came haunting you few days later; which was too bad, because you had already forgotten about them, until the very moment they had punched you to the face.

…or rather to your shoulder and it wasn’t even a punch, more like one of those bumps people did, especially when they were being jerks, shoving you too hard for you to believe it was an accident.

“Sorry, didn’t see you there,” you threw over your shoulder sarcastically, continuing your way to the women’s locker room.

In hindsight, that was probably mistake number one; ignoring Henry and not starting a fight right there, not to mention being mouthy.

To be fair, you had no interest in further interaction; you were exhausted from the training, you were sticky and sweaty and all you craved was a shower. You would have just gone to have one at your dorm, but Shauna was having a hot date and you didn’t want to step on her toes. So you had taken your toiletries with you, using the showers near the gym.

Using the gym shower; mistake number two. It meant all of the students being gone by the time you emerged in fresh homey clothes, hair dripping water, because you hated hair-dryers and avoided them unless they were completely necessary.

You had spent much longer in the shower than needed, allowing your muscles to completely relax under the spray of water. That was mistake number three.

The fourth mistake was your pride. When you saw Henry, Jim, George (at least you thought, you weren’t sure, not having many classes with him) and Frank in the corridor, clearly waiting for you, since they bounced off the wall they had been resting against when you appeared, you should have probably been smarter and scream for help right away.

But no, you were being Miss Future Agent and you weren’t intimidated by four equivalents of high school jocks. Yep, this one was definitely the biggest mistake of yours.

“Fellas,” you beckoned to them, passing them gracefully, your bag over your shoulder along with the wet towel.

You barely made a few steps before a hand gripped your arm, harshly tugging you back. Your heart jumped into your throat, but you tried your best not to let it show. You turned to Henry, looking at his face, head tilted back just slightly due to his height.

“Is there a problem, Ulrich?” you asked calmly, earning a lift of his eyebrows at your tone.

“You know there is. I told you it was not over.”

You tried to ignore your pulse skyrocketing and the panic rising in your gut. You were not that stupid – you understood the implications. You knew that with four guys slowly circling you, you would have to fight bites and nails if it came to it and probably still lose. Sometimes it was just better to walk away and swallow your pride; a concept Henry and Jim clearly didn’t understand.

You jerked from Ulrich’s grip, still hoping you could walk away and call it day.

“It is over for me. Now if you’ll excuse me…“

Yes, you were being naïve thinking it would work.

The bag was torn away from your shoulder, your fingers automatically letting go to stay attached to your hand. You gritted your teeth, blood slowly reaching the boiling point.

Also, maybe you were more than just a bit afraid. Not that you would ever admit it to them.

Henry’s hand reached for your chin and your snatched it away in disgust before he could even make contact with your skin. Amusement dances in his eyes along with a flash of anger.

“Oh, kitty has claws?”

You felt another hand on your backside, sending a shudder up your spine, so you grabbed it, shoving it away as well.

Jim. Why weren’t you surprised? Pigs. What the fuck was their problem?

“I’ll let you know when I meet any. Now get out of my way,” you spat, your gut twisting as a sly grin spread on Henry’s face and he made a step right into your route.

“Or what? You’ll scratch, kitty? Or you’ll scream? Like a little girl?” he mocked you in high-pitched voice, his face lowering to yours so you were only inches apart.

“Bet you’d like that,” you murmured, narrowing your eyes when his breath with an unmistakable hint of alcohol fanned over your face. “No, I’ll offer you a breath-mint, because honestly you should do something about your breath.”

Yep, that was the mistake no.5 and definitely an enormous one.

You heard one of the guys chuckle, but you never got to enjoy the thrill of victory.

Out of blue, there was something around your neck, the weight of the towel shifting (add that to the mistake list) and your body flew backwards, colliding with a male one. George was it?

Your hands went to instinctively grab after the towel crushing your throat, but suddenly they were wrested down and pinned to your sides by strong arms. Jim had caught one, Henry another. Fucking cowards.

With your breath coming out short with both lack of oxygen and rising fear, your pulse thundering in your ears, you tried to jerk from their grip, but they wouldn’t budge, having an undeniable advantage.

Oh fuck, fuck, you were so fucked.

“Sassy little mouth, aren’t we?” Henry hummed, wry expression on his ugly face. “So dirty, feels like we should wash it with something. Who wants to go first, fellas?”

Loud alarm bells rang in your head, icy shiver running down your spine, stomach turning over.

Oh no, you don’t.

Your knee snapped up on instinct to gain the momentum, followed by a swift low kick to Jim’s knee.

He yelped and let go of your arm, allowing you to send an elbow straight to George’s face; and finally, your airways were free as the assault as the towel trap loosened.

You coughed, fighting for oxygen and mindlessly threw the item away to have at least one arm free.

“Bitch!” one of the men yelled; you weren’t sure which one, but you didn’t waste time thinking too much. Survival instinct took over.

Tears prickled in the corners of your eyes and you barely silenced the scream when Henry took advantage of your hesitation, twisting your arm behind your back. Fuck he really had a thing for that, didn’t he?

You tried to kick him, but someone else’s leg somehow managed to swept their leg under yours and you fell on your knees. Sharp tug on your hair caused you to cry out and obediently tilt your head back. Few tears escaped you, but you pushed up in attempt to get up again.

A kick coming from behind threw your body forwards and you nearly fell on your face when Henry finally let go of you. You tasted blood as you bit your cheek, but you managed to at least land on your shoulder instead of face-planting.

It still hurt like a bitch, but at least you still had all your teeth… or you thought so, not having time to check. Catching a movement from the corner of your eye, you managed to roll over before a kick to your side could hit you with full force. Frank’s foot only brushed you, but you were sure you’d have a bruise as a souvenir anyway.

A punch landed next to your face when you dodged it in the last moment, someone grabbing your legs and holding them together. Between your efforts to free them, you didn’t have time to chase away the body suddenly holding your arms as well.

“Fuck--- she’s a handful.”

A ragged battle cry erupted from your throat as you tried to jerk your body from their grip on pure instinct, every self-defence move you had ever learned flying of the window.

“More fun to break her, don’t you think?” Henry purred, his hand sneaking around your waist under the hem of your t-shirt.

Your head spun like crazy at the skin-to-skin contact and nausea hitting you hard. You wanted to puke and scream and punch and you couldn’t make yourself to do either, tears rolling down your cheeks as your body convulsed in a desperate attempt to break free.

There was ringing in your ears, disorienting you, but aware of the hand suddenly covering your mouth you tried to bite it on instinct holding you down.

“Oh-ho, biting!“ you heard, strangely muffled as if you were under water.

“I like them feisty-“

“Playing hard to get!”

“Shit, SHIT-“

The pressure on your legs eased all of sudden and you immediately kicked with all you had, catching the rising figure in the calf, knocking them off balance.

“Fuck!”

You would swear the floor vibrated, but in must have only been your mind playing tricks on you. George disappeared from your field of blurry vision; you only saw a fist sending him flying sideways.

Yep, your mind was fucking making up things, because there was no way he could have been thrown away like this by a single punch. You weren’t complaining; the relief the illusion provided was almost blissful.

Henry’s body weight vanished as well in nearly supersonic speed as if he wanted to escape the illusion. So you did the first thing that came to your mind; with your hands free, you grabbed his ankle, stopping him from running away. Which, thinking about it, was stupid, because only a moment before, you would have given anything to get him the fuck away from you.

He kicked back blindly, but his sole never met with your body – he was dragged away and… and lifted to the air as if he weighted nothing.

Blinking your tears away, your fuzzy mind cleared.

Only to reveal a very muscled and very much pissed off blond slamming Henry against a wall and then letting his suddenly unconscious body slide down.

You gasped, your eyes catching a glimpse of the fourth figure – Frank – several feet away, running for his life.

“Buck?!” came a shout and before you could question it, a metal arm emerged from behind the corner, stopping Frank dead as he rushed straight into it.

“Yep?!” the dark-haired supersoldier yelled back, sounding almost amused.

What the hell was happening? What the hell just happened?!

You blood sizzled in your veins, loud and rapid thump-thump-thump banging in your ears, face damp with several shed tears, body aching and your mind fucking racing.

You heard a whimper on your left, automatically turning to the sound. It left Jim’s lips, his form crumbled on the floor, struggling to stand up.

The captain’s knee seemed to come out of nowhere, digging into Jim’s back and pinning him down again before you even registered a movement.

“Is it fucking over now?”

“Steve, let him be. Not worth it,” Barnes’ voice tried to reason, sounding rather growly, but not nearly as loud as before. He approached your group in rapid pace and Rogers scoffed and let go.

You gulped at sergeant’s angry grimace, crazily convinced he was angry with you for all the mistakes you made that lead to this; but his expression softened when his gaze fell on you.

“Hey there,” he greeted you almost casually, holding out a hand to help you up. “Can you stand?”

You blinked several times at the suddenly dispassionate tone, even if you still sensed something bubbling under it. You shook off the thought and accepted the offered hand – the flesh one. The detail didn’t escape you, your bran in overdrive. Of course he hadn’t offered you the metal arm. He didn’t want to scare you. He was thoughtful like that-

-or not. The strength he dragged you up with was way too much for you, more so when combined with the speed and your state. You stumbled over your feet, a wave of dizziness messing with your balance.

You awaited the upcoming reunion with the floor, unable to stop the fall, but it never happened. Before you could as much as reel, gentle hands supported you in a firm grip, pleasantly warm against your bare arms.

“Whoa, take it easy,” Rogers’ voice warned you, soothing. For some reason, it felt more like ‘I got you,’ instead of ‘take it easy.’

You took a deep breath, Barnes’ hand letting go of yours as he semi-voluntarily handed you over to his friend.  

“You’re bleeding from your mouth.”

Thanks for the reminder, I noticed.

You swallowed the snarky remark, well-aware of the sergeant’s care. You fought against the urge to spit the blood out.

“Is fine…” you muttered, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand. “Bit my cheek. I’m pretty sure I—“ you quickly ran your tongue over your teeth just to confirm your theory, “-still have all of my teeth.”

Sergeant Barnes gave you a tiny smile, the worried crinkle that had found its way between his brows disappearing.

“Whatever you say.”

His gaze flickered to something behind your head, probably in order of exchanging a wordless conversation with your still present crutch. Not that you were complaining. The weight of what had happened was slowly settling on your shoulders and you were grateful for any support – and who were you kidding, Captain America made for a pretty reliable support.

“Why don’t we leave you in pu- Cap’s capable hands while I-“ Barnes’ jaw clenched, pale eyes scanning the four bodies on the floor, calculating. “-take out the trash?”

You nearly choked at the choice of his words, wincing. Captain Rogers’ hands squeezed your shoulders reassuringly and you nodded, not sure what else to do.

You didn’t want to look at Henry. Or Jim. Or their loyal companions.

So when the captain carefully spun you on your heels, you didn’t protest and your feet started moving on autopilot in the direction he had set.

“You okay to walk without support?” he asked softly, a stark contrast to the voice you remembered from earlier or from the training sessions.

You knew that if you said yes, he would let go of you. Honestly, his touch felt damn nice, firm and yet somewhat gentle, a pleasant contrast to harsh fingers of the men who had the nerve to attack you – you had to swallow bile rising to your mouth at the awfully fresh memory. Fuck, it had been so close, just a minute later and--- you shook your head mentally and tried your best to erase this memory from existence.

You decided not to abuse the kindness the captain was offering. After several indulging steps, you quietly confirmed he could release you. You found out that sensing his large frame by your side as if he was your bodyguard was nearly as comforting. Nearly.

You didn’t have the strength admonish yourself for basking the light of his protective persona. Future agent of not, you still had the right to want to feel secure at times.

After all, you were only human.

A Handful of Truths

You didn’t realize you were shaking until a blanket was tossed over your shoulders.

You were sitting on a short couch in what looked like a cosy office, hair still damp, body finally registering the ache caused by previous events, just like your brain was slowly taking in what had happened.

Captain Rogers, whose courtesy was to escort you from the hellhole you had been attacked in, had clearly took it as a personal mission to take care of your injuries; it hadn’t dawned to you until you were seated and your mind helpfully supplied you with ‘This isn’t the infirmary’.

He pulled a swivel chair to sit face to face with you, a box of medical supplies left open on the coffee table at your side. You didn’t realize he had moved the chair or dug the box from god-knew-where until the items were simply there.

“How do you feel?” he inquired, attentive eyes scanning your hunched form. You instinctively curled onto yourself, snuggling further into the blanket. You knew you should come up with an answer, but your brain started to hurt with the effort to do so. “I guess that’s fair. Can you tell me what hurts the most?”

You quickly glanced at his openly kind face, his baby blues still watching for any reaction that would clue him. Your throat went dry at the compassion of display and you had to swallow before speaking – and think. What hurt the most…?

You didn’t know what possessed you to tell him what you did, but it came out before you could stop yourself.

“My pride,” you croaked, causing his eyebrows jump just like the corner of his lips.

“That’s probably fair too. Then again, I’d rather know about something I can fix.”

You felt your body relax a little at his informal tone – you might even say a jovial one, but you could still sense too much worry behind it to call it that. You attempted a tiny smile at least to show him that you were more or less fine – you weren’t – and brilliantly failed.

“Landed on my shoulder. Probably gonna have a bruise on my side from when… when they kicked me. Ribs and arms might be a bit tender for few days, ‘cause they were heavy as they--- they’re heavy,” you voice wavered as you saw the muscles on the captain’s forearms clench and his hands curled up in fists. You sheepishly looked up to his face. “I got lucky.”

His eyebrows rose again in a ‘figures’ manner as he leaned back to the chair.

“Nothing else apart from that, your cheek and your pride?”

“I’m a little cold, but you took care of that,” you admitted, taking a deep breath in as you tugged on the blanket pointedly.

Despite what you were saying, you didn’t feel okay, the tremble never quite leaving your body. It wasn’t hard to figure out why. You stared at your knight in shining armour, gathering courage to do what was needed. You tried your best to meet his gaze, feeling so small and embarrassingly weak in front of him.

“Could have been much worse if you haven’t showed up. Thank you.”

He pressed his lips together, shaking his head. He leaned in, his elbows on his knees.

“I’m sorry I wasn’t faster... I should have kept closer eye on Ulrich,” he muttered under his breath, making you wonder if you only imagined it. “Your pride shouldn’t be hurt. You held yourself against them just fine.”

Your heart skipped a beat at the honestly his voice held – and you were honestly grateful for the slight shift of attention. Oh. Had he forgotten how things had been when he had arrived?

You weren’t sure whether you should remind him. You definitely didn’t want to remind yourself, but before you could solve your little dilemma, he clarified.

“You haven’t started training the combat against multiple opponents yet. Let alone four opponents, all of them having both height and weight advantage. You couldn’t exactly go all Black Widow on them if no one showed you how.”

He accented his words with a reassuring smile and you almost believed him. The shivers finally eased, most likely thanks to the warm treatment you were being given in all senses of the word. The inner cold gradually melted and you were left in nothing but pleasant warmth.

Mentally, you patted your pride gently on its head; you couldn’t quite disagree with him. No matter how helpless you had felt earlier and how ashamed for it you were, the truth was you were still learning. You weren’t a finished agent yet.

You breathed in and out, avoiding the gaze that was still on you. It felt like a freaking brand with how intense it was. You couldn’t say you hated it necessarily, you only wished you at least didn’t look so pathetic. No make-up, probably red with a smudge on blood somewhere, perhaps with some bruising already forming, hair wet and messy. You absently ran your fingers through it in attempt to fix it a bit as if it could help.

What had you been talking about? Right… those assholes being cowards and coming at your four against one.

“I… I just fucking hate bullies,” you grumbled darkly, your hand immediately covering your mouth when you realized what you had said. Oh. Language. Still your superior you’re talking to, no matter how nice. “Sorry. Please, pretend you didn’t hear the f-word. I just hate bullies, period.”

“I might have sworn earlier too, so let’s call it even,” the captain offered, one corner of his lips raised. Oh. He had, hadn’t he? ‘Is it fucking over now?’ What did that even mean? “And so I heard.”

“What?” you yelped, your mind racing again in search for the meaning behind his words.

“I mean… I heard you. When you were defending Bucky, in the gym. I’m pretty sure your exact words were about a ‘pissing contest���.”

“Oh god,” you breathed out, your face no doubt set aflame. He had heard you; that was why he had said he should have kept a closer eye on Henry. Oh. Ohhhh.

Also, did he just say ‘pissing’?

“You weren’t wrong by the way. But… neither were them.”

You blinked in surprise. What? “About?”

You knew he didn’t mean the sleeping around with recruits, your gut was screaming that at you, because they wouldn’t, but still, you rather asked for clarification. If he didn’t mean that part, which one then?

“Ladies do fall over for Bucky,” he hummed with a lopsided smile, a playful twinkle in his eyes. It did something to your belly, a strange familiar shift that was very inappropriate, but hell, people needed to cut you some slack. He was impossible not to ogle and you didn’t have the energy to control your reaction after today’s events. “And I don’t really pull my punches when I’m training those two in particular.”

“Why?” you blurted out before you could stop yourself and think better of it.

His gaze bored into yours, burning with intensity and with a glint of something you couldn’t quite put your finger on.

“I don’t like bullies either.”

Did he lean in even more or were you so focused on his face it only seemed closer?

You weren’t able to look away. His blue eyes simply locked you in, not allowing you to escape. The strangest thing was that it wasn’t scary. It should be, he was— he was a freaking captain, your superior, a superior to a lot of people, which you were constantly forgetting ever since he had saved you from falling on your ass in the hallway and you had to remember that.

Before you could though, your racing mind packed up and let your body, your mouth to be precise, act without supervision.

“Not trying to impress the ladies then, huh?”

His tiny sheepish smile cut off the uprising panic in your chest when you realized how bold of you was to say that. He lowered his gaze, giving a subtle shrug. “Guess I wouldn’t want one falling for guy’s muscles and a show-off of dominance.”

“What for then? Honesty? Sincerity? Kind eyes? Strong moral compass?” you heard yourself prying, internally horrified how far you had come when saying that. Your face was drained of colour when it clicked. You were literally naming things you liked about him, absolutely shamelessly putting them in the open. Oh shit. Fix it, fix it, fix it! “…the sass?”

His eyes went wide and he burst out laughing so loud it startled you for a second, especially as he threw his head back with the outburst. Then you reluctantly joined him, covering your face with your hands in embarrassment.

“The sass!” he howled, unable to hold back another fit of laughter and when you peeked at him through between your fingers, you saw his palm resting against his chest as if it could help him stop laughing.

Just like that, blood rushed back into your cheeks.

“Oh god, I made it worse!” you cried out, wishing for the earth to swallow you, frantically looking around for the fastest escape route. “Oh my god, I have to switch schools now… excuse me-“

You hastily got up from your seat, but a quick hand snatched yours, pulling you back.

You stumbled, landing ungracefully right back in your place, this time without the blanket. Captain Rogers was watching you with the corners of his lips high, his eyes sparkling with amusement.

“Sorry for grabbing you like that. But no, please. Stay.”

Your throat closed off when you heard his soft plea, only traces of humour in it. Yeah, you bet he hadn’t met anyone with such big mouth for a while, so he thought it was better to keep the comic around.

“Captain Rogers, I-I- what I said, it was completely out of line-“ you stuttered, only to be interrupted.

“Were you making it up?” he questioned.

You gulped, your mind screaming at you to say yes to save you the humiliation. And yet, with the cerulean irises staring into your eyes, your mouth did the exact opposite.

“No.”

Dammit.

“Then why would you go?” he questioned softly. His hand still didn’t leave yours, only easing the grip into a kinder one. You felt like a brand was being burned into your skin. A pleasant one, so you didn’t retreat. Oh, you’d never. But what on Earth was he getting at? “We need someone honest like you. People who stand up for others, even if only to defend their honour. That is the kind of people who should be in this line of work. The good ones.”

You opened your mouth, no sound coming out as his speech shook you to your core, tickling your stomach pleasantly along with your pride. His words seemed to be coming from heart, genuine, which was not helping your blood pressure and suddenly wobbling limbs.

“Even when they have potty mouth and put their foot in it? ‘Cause I seem to excel in that.”

“Especially then,” he chuckled and you could tell there was no pinch of a lie in it.

Something was in the air, crackling deliciously, and you liked it. You wouldn’t be able to describe it properly, the feeling simply too unique, but it was tickling your fancy so weren’t about to complain.

“O-okay. Thank you, Captain,” you whispered, revelling in the sight of the gentle curve of his lips.

“You started with the compliments, Agent.”

And just like that, you wanted to run for your life again, drowning in embarrassment.

What were you even still doing here? Complimenting him? Enjoying his touch? Flirting with him?

Were you nuts?!

Him, a captain— no, the captain. And you, an agent--- hell, you were not even an agent yet!

The captain whose eyes flickered to not-an-agent’s lips for the shortest of moments, widening a fraction before returning to her eyes.

Oh, now you were definitely going nuts. You were hallucinating. You must have hit your head too. He wasn’t into you and you being into him was very stupid.

You should go.

…any moment now.

…just get off your ass for god’s sake-

“Can I ask you something?”

You blinked yourself back to reality, shushing the voice in your head, curious smile appearing on your lips involuntarily. The softness of his voice felt better than the blanket before and you wanted to cocoon yourself in it, postponing the leaving plans to never.

“Sure,” you replied, the smile remaining on your face despite your better judgement.

He lowered his eyes to your joined hands, his thumb running over the back of your hand in a feather-light touch. You heart positively stopped at the moment, your breath hitching. Holy shit, what was he doing?

“This, does it… do you hate it?” he whispered the question, not meeting your eyes as if he was too shy, which was… ridiculous. He had no reason to be shy.

It still felt like a shot through your heart – a nice one, though, it that was possible. The words combined with the way they were spoken, it stirred something in your belly, warming it up and you couldn’t deny it anymore.

You really wanted this man; whatever this was, it was getting beyond a silly crush. Also, for some reason, it seemed as if he was trying to tell you he was interested too, which you thought was pretty freaking crazy.

“Stay honest, please,” he pleaded when you didn’t answer right away.

Did you hate it? The chastest display of affection if you dared to call it that? Your mind raced, trying to figure out why on earth he would ask that. Because the only reason you had come up with so far was completely impossible.

“No,” you said simply, earning a brief glance up before he looked down again. His Adam’s apple bobbed.

“Good. That’s good… and would you… I’m aware this is out of line and I—I want you to answer truthfully without fearing the consequences-…“

It was your turn to swallow loudly, because what? What did he want to ask that he considered it out of line? He was your superior – you could think of thousand ways of how you could get out of line, but him? And why should you fear the consequences?! Did he want you to help him to hide a body?

That’s not it and you know it. You know what he wants to ask, you rational side admonished you.

Oh please, shut up. Since when you switched sides?

“O-okay. What— what is it-- Steve?” you stuttered out, freezing when his name left your lips and his head snapped up, his hand giving yours a squeeze. Oh boy.

“Would you possibly say you like it?” he blurted out and your brain went to overdrive at the hope behind his expression.

Huh. He really just asked that. Oh shit. Oh wow. Your jaw fell into your lap – only figuratively, you hoped –, your ears buzzing, your blood bursting in excitement.

Oh yeah, you understood why he mentioned the consequences. Either you could say no and you’d fear he might treat you differently or you could say yes and you’d ‘fear’ he might treat you differently.

The fire in your insides burned hotter at the idea of the latter.

His hand slowly left yours, giving you a simple choice you still couldn’t believe you were given.

Holy shit. What do you even say to something like that? Coming from someone like him? Your brain froze as you only managed to stare.

Did his— did the corners of his lips turn down? Was that sadness pooling in the sea of blue of his eyes?

Oh no, you don’t.

“Y-yes,” you admitted sheepishly, closing your eyes at the heaviness of your confession.

You could feel the weight on your shoulders as silence fell, only interrupted by your soft breathing that sounded ominously loud.

Your fingers twitched when his warm palm covered them again, your lips parting in surprise. You kept your eyes closed, indulging the strange moment. His free hand caressed your other as well, the gentlest of touches, tender, contrasting with rough callouses on his fingers.

“I like it too.”

At that, you gathered enough courage to look at him, only to see him inspecting your face closely, observing your reactions. It shocked you that it wasn’t uncomfortable as you would expect; must have been the kindness and wonder in his gaze. You forced your lips to curl up in a tiniest smile. Steve smiled back with same hesitance, his face lighting up.

He looked like a boy next door (making it to a modelling agency), shining eyes and happy grin forming on his lips. He was more gorgeous than ever.

Still keeping your hands, he raised his right one, his knuckles brushing your unharmed cheek. The gesture was so tender it brought tears into your eyes, causing him quickly retreat.

“Sorry-“

You shook your head with a self-deprecating chuckle, squeezing his fingers before he could let go of you completely.

“It’s not you—I mean… it is you,” you babbled nonsensically, taking a breath to gather your thoughts. “It’s just— that was really sweet. No, that’s not-“ Not the right word. “It was beautiful. I swear I never felt so…” loved “-cared for in my life.”

He frowned, a shadow of pain running over his face. “I didn’t mean to upset you. I know that today was… unpleasant.”

Seeing his reluctance and discomfort, you went for the first thing that came up to your mind. You straightened up and pressed a light kiss on his cheek, withdrawing much slowly because once you were in his orbit, it was hard to leave.

His breath hitched, his eyes glued to you intently, flickering to your lips again.

“You didn’t upset me, Steve. That’s the last thing you could do with that,” you assured him, face still inches from his. His name rolled off your tongue easily this time, even though it still left your heart fluttering.

“And if I asked you to have dinner with me?”

Your stomach twisted in a pleasant knot at that suggestion, your lizard brain already thinking about having a dessert for a second; and you weren’t thinking cake or ice-cream.

Yeah, barely. This was a guy ready to treat you right, you were sure of it. He certainly wasn’t about to kiss you now, not afar what happened today, he might go for it after the dinner and that was only if you got lucky enough. You swallowed the disappointment at the idea, quickly shaking it off.

Make up your goddamn mind, woman. You should be glad that men who weren’t thinking with their lower brain still existed and one of those was clearly interested in you, which… yeah, what the hell, that might take a while getting used to. Add the fact that he was being incredibly considerate of how you might feel after being assaulted and you had a winner of your heart. You realized you were actually happy he wouldn’t try anything even nearly ‘funny’.

You were fine with hand-holding and brushes of his fingers on your face, which honestly, the tenderness behind that gesture made you toes curl. You didn’t care much if that made you a freaking sap.

“Still not upset,” you gave an answer at last, deciding he probably liked when you were a bit cheeky.

He offered a closed lipped smile in response, confirming your theory.

“Does that count like a yes?”

You shrugged, the corners of your lips twitching. You had no idea when the change had happened, but all you wanted now was to giggle. And maybe snuggle, but you weren’t about to say that out loud.

“You tell me.”

He licked his lips and shook his head as he retreated. Before you could protest – or have a heart attack, because the motion of his tongue attracted your gaze like a magnet, setting your core on fire –, he sat beside you, leaving enough space in case you didn’t like it.

You liked it, subtly moving an inch closer to his side. Damn, he radiated warmth. Maybe just a bit closer…?

“Cheeky dame, aren’t you?” Steve more stated than asked, reaching for the blanket pooled around you to cover you again.

You didn’t realize you had goosebumps before his hands gently tugged you in, careful not to touch you where you could consider it inappropriate.

Yeah, forget about any funny business any time soon.

You huffed. “Clearly. It did get me into trouble before.”

His eyes darkened a bit, his face noticeably falling.

No, nope, bad move, miss not-an-agent.

“I should walk you back to your dorm,” he remarked, already rising to his feet.

You first reaction was to say no, because you weren’t ready to say goodbye yet. Your second was to say no also, because Shauna probably still had her hot date.

Instead, your hand shot up to catch his, effectively stopping him. He froze before returning to his seat, tiny question mark in a place of his face right next to his soft smile.

You cleared your throat, deciding to give him the latter reason.

“Uhm… my roommate has a date. If I go there, I’ll probably find a sock on the doorknob,” you admitted, biting your lip when he raised an eyebrow and relaxed to the cushions.

“People still do that?”

You chuckled, the fact that not only he was a captain, but also Captain America, which meant he was about hundred years old, hitting you like a train.

“Yeah, people still do that,” you assured him, amused.

He pouted, which you found unfairly adorable and… kissable. Nope, later.

“Sure, make fun of the old man…” he uttered, but a spark of laughter lighted up in his irises, so you assessed he wasn’t too offended. He was most likely used to the teasing.

As an idea of interpreting his words differently popped in your mind, you grinned.

“Is that a permission to make fun of Sergeant Barnes?” you pried playfully, sending Steve into another surprised fit of laughter, not unlike when you had complimented his sass. Your heart swelled at the joyful picture of him and the prospect of seeing more of it in future.

Due to his laughter, you didn’t hear he knock on the door if there was any n the first place. The door simply swung open, revealing the other supersoldier. Speak of the Devil…

Seeing his friend, Steve burst out laughing once more. Sergeant Barnes closed the door with a puzzled look.

You just shrugged in response, opening your mouth without a sound coming out and he took in the scene in front of him again, a smirk appearing on his lips. Under that gaze, you felt your face heat up. You could only imagine how that looked like, Steve cosily close to you, laughing, your hand right next to his thigh as his outburst had sent it sliding from his hand.

The smirk on the supersoldier’s face only deepened when he noticed how flustered he had made you.

“Punk?” he questioned and Steve wheezed once more, raising a palm in the sergeant’s direction, turning to you first.

He offered you a hand to shake. Confused, you accepted as his eyes twinkling in mischief bored into yours.

“Deal,” he mouthed, sending your lips twitching, and only then he shifted his attention to his friend. “Buck?”

The supersoldier had his eyes narrowed, watching you suspiciously.

“I’m gonna regret sending you with her instead of doing it the other way around, aren’t I?” he stated, not actually asking as his gaze flickered between the two of you.

His expression pushed you over the edge and the giggle building up in your chest for the last few minutes finally broke free. You simply couldn’t contain it anymore despite having two superiors in the room. Steve gave you a warm smile as the sound left your lips, clearly not bothered by it.

You hoped you’d be forgiven by Sergeant Barnes as well. After all, you were just human.

“Yeah, Buck, I think you are.”

S.R. masterlist

Sorry for the cavities at the end. Or should I say ‘you’re welcome’? Whatever works for you :))

Thank you for reading!