#and of course this dude loves Bowie and Prince

[maximura]

[dammitperseus]

man david crosby is such a staple of my taste and appreciation of music, an integral part of my childhood and my teenage years, like any music he had even remotely a hand in followed me everywhere this hits hard

[seasurfacefullofclouds1]

Harry Styles is a really nice guy. I know this because he told me himself, over and over, in his songs.

Take “Boyfriends,” the penultimate track from his forthcoming album, Harry’s House. Singing in a tender croon over a gentle, finger-picked guitar lick that evokes the ’70s AM gold of John Denver, Styles enumerates the many ways in which most boyfriends are bad. “They think you’re so easy,” he says. “They take you for granted / They don’t know they’re just misunderstanding you.” A few lines later, he sniffs, “You love a fool who knows just how to get under your skin.”

As he makes clear in the other songs on Harry’s House, Styles himself is not guilty of any of these offenses. He is the opposite of those other guys. And he’s here to be your surrogate best friend, romantic partner, and/or sensitive ally, the hunky hero who will whisper sweet nothings while the dumpy zero in your life watches sports on the couch. In the ersatz indie-pop number “Grapejuice,” he’s the hopeless romantic who admits that “I was on my way to buy some flowers for you.” In the low-key bedroom ballad “Little Freak,” he’s the sultry dreamboat who raves about “the body all that yoga gave you.” But mostly, he’s just … nice! Really, really nice! “Take a walk on Sunday through the afternoon,” he sighs moonily in “Love Of My Life.” “We can always find something for us to do.”

Harry Styles’ public-facing persona is so relentlessly pleasant and ingratiating that it’s almost impossible to criticize the guy. Picking on Harry is like giving the finger to Tom Hanks or Barney the dinosaur. It feels wrong. And yet … something has bugged me about him ever since he broke free of teen-pop phenoms One Direction with his 2017 self-titled debut and subsequently forged a wildly successful solo career. And I think I finally figured out what it is: The niceness. The aggressive, hectoring, not totally plausible niceness. While I’m sure Harry Styles is a swell guy in real life, it’s inconceivable that any person on Earth could be as nice as he is in his songs. Even the most compassionate among us has a weak moment every now and then. But with Styles, it always comes back to rote generosity.

“Harry Styles is a good person” is Harry Styles’ overriding artistic credo. He lays it on so thick that the performative altruism becomes oppressive, like in “Treat People With Kindness,” a particularly egregious nice-guy routine from Styles’ blockbuster second album, 2019’s Fine Line. “Maybe we can / Find a place to feel good,” he sings. “And we can treat people with kindness / Find a place to feel good.” Do I dispute the message of the song? Of course not. Nobody can. And that’s the point. It’s bulletproof brand burnishing. Finding a place to feel good … is good! It’s the equivalent of a corporation tweeting out a social-justice slogan. What it’s not is compelling art.

As I played Harry’s House, I kept wondering: Has Harry Styles ever been a bad boyfriend? Has he ever said the wrong thing or had an impulse that is impure, untoward, or selfish? Has he ever felt like not taking a walk through a park on a Sunday afternoon? Really, dude? A song like “Boyfriends” would seem disingenuous or even creepy if it appeared on a John Mayer record, because we know John Mayer is a flawed human being, to say the least. But to his credit, whatever else you want to say about John Mayer, he’s copped to those shortcomings in his songs. Whereas Harry Styles — the occasional, conspicuous lyrical reference to sniffing cocaine or popping “pills” aside — comes off like a life-sized Ken doll on Harry’s House. And that makes for a terribly boring listening experience.

In a recent list of the world’s most stylish musicians, Styles was praised as “a new-school style icon in the gender-fluid footsteps of ’70s and ’80s heroes — especially David Bowie and Prince,” presumably because he wears dresses on stage, just as countless other straight male pop stars have done for a half-century. I personally wouldn’t compare him to Bowie or Prince, for a variety of reasons. He reminds me more of the monologue that opens Mary Harron’s 2000 film American Psycho, in which Christian Bale’s Patrick Bateman coldly intones, “There is an idea of a Patrick Bateman. Some kind of abstraction. But there is no real me. Only an entity. Something illusory.”

Something illusory. That, to me, sums up the fantasy version of himself that Harry Styles serves up on Harry’s House. To be clear: I am not comparing Harry Styles to a fictional serial killer in any other way! (Though injecting American Psycho into Harry’s House would definitely make it less dull.) What I am saying is that his persona, which informs how his songs are heard and discussed, is very much about presenting a facade that is divorced from reality. Yes, he is handsome and charismatic. But he is not some transgressive paradigm-shifter. He is the paradigm. If he looked like Ed Sheeran, he would have the credibility of Ed Sheeran. Because his actual music occupies the same middle-of-the-road pop lane as Ed Sheeran’s.

This is where the nods to genuine innovators like Prince and Bowie — both of whom were fearless about owning and exploring the thorniest parts of their lives and psyches in their songs — start to seem especially preposterous. Styles, at heart, is a pastiche artist who specializes in making soundalikes of the most broadly accepted music from the 1970s onward. This is another kind of facade, an additional distancing device that keeps you at arm’s length from a flesh-and-blood person who might have an original (or even dangerous) thought or two. What you get instead is a curator of cool signifiers. His songs always remind you of better songs.

On Harry’s House, the strongest numbers take a meta turn by evoking other contemporary pastiches, layering more copies on top of copies. The smash hit “As It Was” — which is rocketing rapidly toward a half-billion streams on Spotify a mere six weeks after it was released — is Harry doing his version of The Weeknd’s “Blinding Lights,” which was The Weeknd doing his version of A-Ha’s “Take On Me.” (Who could have predicted the long shadow of A-Ha’s influence on 21st-century pop?) On the amiably breezy summer jam “Daydreaming,” which sounds like another potential hit, Harry puts his spin on Bruno Mars’ spin on ’70s soul.

Working again with long-time musical collaborators Kid Harpoon and Tyler Johnson, Harry’s House sonically resembles the agreeably bland star who made it. Lyrically, it disproves the notion that referencing a Joni Mitchell song in your album title is the same as writing with the candor and insight of Joni Mitchell. “If the stars were edible / And our hearts were never full / Could we live with just a taste?” he philosophizes in the album-opening “Music For A Sushi Restaurant.” Given how air-headed that sentiment is, perhaps it’s best that he mostly operates in idealized plastic boyfriend mode. “You stub your toe / or break your camera / I’ll do everything I can to help you through,” he pledges in the wan yacht-rock tune “Late Night Talking,” a song that also sounds like music made for a sushi restaurant.

The genius of Styles’ one-time girlfriend Taylor Swift (or Joni Mitchell, for the matter) is that even when they write about their pettiest and most vindictive sides — see the entirety of Reputation — it makes people like them even more. Because listeners recognize those unattractive (but universal!) personality traits in themselves. Nobody, as they say, is perfect. And imperfections are infinitely more fascinating and relatable than airbrushed delusion. But Harry Styles still won’t show us those jagged, authentic edges.

Here’s the truth: Harry Styles is rich. He is famous. He is powerful. He is currently dating Ted Lasso’s estranged wife. Based on that information alone, we can conclude that he is probably a lot darker and more complicated (and therefore more interesting!) than he lets on in his songs. And being a little more honest about that would go a long way to making his music more exciting. At the very least, he would finally be something more than illusory.

[lasquadrasfuckhouse]

in a silly goofy mood and here to talk about the highlights of each part of jojo

phantom blood

erina pendleton

it's a fucking retelling of dracula dude

titanic wants what phantom blood has (vampires)

dio is there

honestly i love how speedwagon is the narrator and then the organization founded by him is a constant for the rest of the universe it's like he never stopped being the narrator and i think that's really cool

phantom blood was good you guys just have bad taste

battle tendency

erina is back and this time she's even more terrifying

kars is there

the pillarmen in general tbh

the music absolutely fucks

main character in drag

milf

stardust crusaders

dio is back and even crazier and now also a slut

and all his cronies are there either because he's sexy or because he has money or both

avdol is there

the entire story is basically just 'what happens when a mama boy's mama is threatened'

impeccable group dynamics

the bangles

diamond is unbreakable

ok so picture prince. are u picturing him? now make that an entire artistic concept

the fucking whiplash of a slice of life murder mystery in a weird little town after all the drama and saving-the-world of the previous parts

suddenly an alien who looks like legolas shows up and just becomes friends with the main crew + implied time travel nonsense, both with absolutely no explanation

araki thought 'ok what if.... me, but i was a rude little man' and just plopped in a self-insert twinksona

one of the absolute best parts of the whole series i do not take questions

vento aureo

it's found family with good-hearted gangsters what more could you want

upending an entire underworld that's parasitic to the innocent and remaking it into essentially a force for vigilante justice i LOVE this song

free real estate for all the minor villain fuckers of the world

occasionally makes me hungry

when u come back from spring break and ur not only the don of the mafia but have a nearly incomprehensible supernatural power

stone ocean

jolyne is there

some algae became sentient and now they're a prison lesbian

weather report is also there

anasui is great eye candy

giorno's terrible little brothers

we have collectively become florida man

suddenly everyone is really good at physics????

everything is full of love!!! there is love everywhere!!!!!

dilf

steel ball run

cowboys

in brightly coloured makeup no less

johnny is there

ok so take dio. sexy, sexy dio. but now he's more of a bastard than evil. he's also a dinosaur and also david bowie

we've got a walking spaghetti western who is somehow also a scene queen in the late 1800s

fleetwood mac

jojolion

prince as a concept: revisited

the fruity little sailor outfit hello????

yasuho is there

nobody knows what the fuck is going on. not the audience, not the characters, not araki. no one has known a goddamn thing for the entire decade it was running. and i love that

and of course, the greatest overarching themes: haute couture and flagrant homoeroticism

[zip001]

getting to know me

tagged by @woodswit “to answer 30 questions + tag 10 blogs you are contractually obliged to know better.”

name/nickname: zip

gender: female

star sign: capricorn

height: 5’2

time: 11:03 am Eastern

birthday: January 2

favourite bands: queen, buena vista social club, jane’s addiction, pink floyd

favourite solo artists: prince, david bowie, kd lang, sade, rihanna

song stuck in my head: “life on mars”

last movie: “knives out” at tysons corner icon movie theater’s grand opening in mclean va

last show: bridgerton

when did I create this blog: (ides of) March 2017

what I post: food (apparently i am a food blog - tagged yummy), things that fill me with wonder (tagged wonder), pink things (tagged i dream in pink), things that make me lmao (tagged omg or lololol or nsfn (aka not suitable for nuns), asoiaf stuff, stream of consciousness (when i feel the need to confess stuff or let off some steam)

last thing I googled: el sol vienna (trying to see if they open today as i have a hankering for muy autentico mexican food - i heard they make awesome guac from a dude formerly from san diego)

other blogs: nil

following: like a lot - if u follow me i follow u

followers: about the same (see above)

average hours of sleep: 6-10

lucky number: 3

instruments: violin (elementary to junior high), glockenspiel and bass drum (high school)

what I am wearing: pink ultra soft sweater coat, floral cotton nightie

dream job: food critic

dream trip: portugal

favourite food: this is so tough so i broke into 3 categories. homecooked meals: my mum’s ga roti (made with coco rico soda and love) with coconut (and chicken broth) rice, and pan fried garlic chinese broccoli. takeout or restaurant: i also love the soup dumplings and pan fried dumplings from din tai fung (arcadia and costa mesa, ca) and the cheese rolls from portos (glendale, burbank, downey, costa mesa and bake at home) and the chicken taquitos from la salsa (dtla), pad eggplant from finn thai (great falls) and the lunch buffet at bollywood bistro (great falls, va). fruit: flavor king pluots, tahitian pineapples (long closed irvine ranch market in woodland hills), mr. ha’s icy cold fuji apples (ha’s apple farm in tehachapi sold in farmers markets and online), and this cantaloup that i had in bainbridge island that was so crisp and sweet and cold that my head spun

nationality: (vietnamese) american

favourite song: barefoot by kd lang and wild as the wind by david bowie

last book I read: treasury regulations (🤢)

top 3 fictional universes I would like to live in: middle earth (as a hobbit of course), green gables (prince edward island), studio gibli universe during peace time (english tudor homes, black cats, rain, yummy food)

tagging @eilitintheheartland @yourtommyginger @queenoferebor1204 @supernovadragoncat @mllekaren @thefeatherofhope @myrish-lace-love @thatgirlnevershutsup @maroucia @kimberlite8 only if they are so inclined

[tyguygoodman]

Mystery Man

At Jefferson high’s masquerade ball, Cyrus follows a trail of notes to find his Prince Charming 

———————————

The repetitive pitter-patter on the window was all Cyrus could hear as he drove his gray Honda Civic through the pouring rain.

He was currently on his way to Andi’s house to meet up the rest of the GHC so they could get ready for the dance. OK, well it wasn’t just any dance. It was a masquerade ball. And Cyrus was so undeniably excited for it.

His cheeks hurt from smiling so much. And even though his suit was slightly tight, he couldn’t care less.

Ever since he knew it existed he’s dreamed of finding some beautiful girl and making her his Cinderella. And he still wanted that! Except now, his plans had changed a little.

Instead of finding some beautiful girl and sweeping her off her feet, he wished more than anything that TJ Kippen, basketball team captain, the most attractive guy in school, his best friend, would be the one to sweep Cyrus off his feet.

The thought made a strange mix of sadness and happiness stir up inside his brain.

Of course, this always happened when he thought about being in a relationship with TJ. Cyrus really truly liked him, but the boy was so obviously straight, it actually hurt.

Girls would come up and flirt with him after games and give him their numbers, although he always denies them, that didn’t mean he didn’t like girls. In fact, One day when Cyrus asked why he always denied the female companionship, He said that he already had a crush.

Probably some beautiful cheerleader with blond hair and perfect blue eyes with a really nice personality…

Cyrus let out a sigh as he realized he was already at the house and had probably been sitting there for a moment or two without moving. He parked the car and grabbed his umbrella, as he stepped up to the front door.

He pushed the cold plastic doorbell into its slot, alerting the girls that he was there, but instead of squealing, he could’ve sworn he heard someone say “Thanks for the help guys, I’ll leave through the back door.” And it was a boys voice too.

It couldn’t have been Bowie’s, it was too high pitched. It couldn’t be Jonah or Walker because they were already at the dance together taking pictures.

It didn’t really matter though, so he let the thought pop out of his head as the door opened up, revealing an Andi with one half of her face covered in makeup and a robe over her dress. “Cyrus! Thank god! Uhm, me and Buffy were just having a disagreement on which mask I should use. Come on in!”

As the girls worked their magic on Cyrus’ face and outfit, making him a huge glittery mess, somewhere in the middle He felt his phone ding in his pocket.

“Stay still!” Buffy groaned when he tried to retrieve it but as soon as he pulled his hand away from his phone, Andi elbowed her harshly, giving her some look that Cyrus didn’t understand.

Buffy’s eyes widened and she stepped away,“ Actually I’m gonna go get some water. You check your phone or whatever.”

He chuckled awkwardly as he shuffled around his back pocket in search, pulling the cold screen out after a second.

It was a Text from TJ.

“I’ve never understood how people can’t recognize a friend under a mask.”

—————

45 terrifying minutes later, the trio was stepping into the school. Cyrus told them to act like they weren’t friends, which would be an obvious give away to who they were, seeing as the whole school knew them as the GHC, but they both stood planted at his side.

“Hey,” Buffy nudged him motioning her head in the direction of the lockers, “I was wondering if I could have back that book I lent you? It’s in your locker right?”

“Well yeah, but do I have to get it right now? I could get it before we go home-”

“Yes!” Andi piped in, seeming overly intrigued by the situation, “I need it now! B…Because I wanted to borrow it! And I need it right now. How could you deprive me of the wonderful world of reading for one more second Cyrus?!”

“Wow, okay…I didn’t realize you wanted to read about basketball so much…”

He walked away tentatively. He was honestly a bit worried about their health at this point.

As Cyrus swished the pesky metal knob back and forth, even failing one time, he finally got it. But instead of immediately grabbing the book from his bottom shelf, he watched a white piece of paper float down to his feet gracefully.

“What the…” his voice trailed off as he leaned down to pick it up, folding open the white material.

‘I heard you talking about a dream’ -Mystery Man

What?

Something so strange was happening…he just didn’t know what.

Who in the world was mystery man? And why did he put a note in Cyrus’ locker? Was it just Andi and Buffy playing a trick on him?

He let out a bit of a laugh, shaking his head slightly. it must’ve been them. That’s why they were acting so suspicious! “Excuse me?”

Cyrus jumped, spinning around suddenly to look at whoever the voice belonged to, simultaneously hiding the note behind his back.

There was a short-ish boy with ginger hair standing in front of the first locker in the row, looking at him.

It was like…incredibly creepy

“Uhm–hi? D-did you need something?” He stuttered, mentally facepalming for tripping up so much.

“This might seem a bit strange,” he started, even taking a deep breath before he started talking again,“ But I’m supposed to give you this.”

The boy pulled out a rose with another piece of paper attached to it. As soon as it was in Cyrus’ grip, the boy ran back into the party.

Got it…Andi and Buffy, we’re really trying to weird him out here.

Maybe they were actually having fun with this. Of course, why would Cyrus wanna ruin their little joke? He read the note on the rose, giving an overdramatic reaction to the girls, who were probably watching him from around the corner.

But when he looked around, he didn’t see either of his friends, but another boy smiling at him. Not creepily, just…happily.

Even if he was smiling creepily, Cyrus wouldn’t care because– oh my god

The teen had a dark gray suit with a red lining and a white undershirt. Tucked in his chest pocket, was a rose. The rose with the most beautiful shade of scarlet covering it. Not to mention it fit his body like– perfectly.

“What did you find?” He asked, motioning to Cyrus’ hand. “Oh, just something…my friends are pranking me. At least I think they are.”

The boy cracked a smile, “I Don’t think that’s the case. If your friends were the ones that gave you those, how do I know about the Dream?”

“Oh…” Cyrus felt his face flush, “You put them in here? What’s your name?”

“Be creative Cyrus. You’re going to have to figure that out yourself.”

The guy walked away after that, leaving him dumbfounded, so Cyrus turned to his note.

'For someone to love you at every seem.’ -Mystery Man

So, he wasn’t being pranked, 'the Fancy-tux-mystery-guy was the one behind the rose and locker note, but Andi and Buffy were still the ones that told me to go there, so they must know something’ He concluded.

with a sigh, he walked out into the dance room, coloring his locker door in the way.

As soon as he spotted Andi’s dress he walked up to her, giving a slight slap on the back of her head.

She turned around with a pout, making Cyrus feel slightly bad. But at least she deserved it.

“What is this about?” He groaned, holding up the notes.

“Who’s mystery man?”

“Don’t play coy with me, Andi! I know you know who he is. He told me.”

“He did?”

Cyrus Smirked, “Not really, but you just confirmed it.”

Andi rolled her eyes, punching him in the shoulder.“I can’t tell you, I’m sorry Cy.”

“Do I at least know him?”

“I mean you would know if you knew him.” Cyrus glared at Buffy as she walked up behind Andi with a smug look on her face.

“Don’t use that with me. Don’t you have some boyfriend to be getting punch for?” He mocked, sticking his young out at her like a mature 17 year old would do.

Andi gasped, pointing to the bottom of the stage “No, but you do!” She handed him an empty cup as she grabbed Buffy’s arm and dragged her away “Enjoy the party!” She yelled back.

He followed where her fingers went, leading him to the same perfect tux boy that he had met before. The boy pointed down to Cyrus’ cup, then winked at him. Leaving the same way Andi did.

He peered into the cup, gasping at the piece of paper taped to the bottom.

Did they plant these things before the party?!

'A boy to make you feel like royalty’ -Mystery man

Now that Cyrus was sure it wasn’t one of his friends being dumb, he really wasn’t sure who this guy was. All of the notes that were given to him made a poem, but the poem didn’t give any hints away as to who the mystery man was.

For half a second, a thought popped into His head that maybe…just maybe, his mystery man was none other than TJ kippen, but he shoved it down as hard as he possibly could. He didn’t want to get his hopes up, and even if He isn’t TJ, he sure is going through a lot to get this message to Cyrus. So he must be a hard working person at least.

“Would you like a snack with your drink dude?”

The black haired boy silently thanked whoever this was for pulling him out of his head.

Now, in front of him was one of the dance waiters. Yes, waiters. They were usually kids that got in detention days before the dance, used as a luxury for the good kids. They weren’t allowed to wear masks so Cyrus was pleasantly surprised with a familiar face.

“Hey, Reed!” Cyrus took a cookie off of the silver platter he was carrying with a polite smile. “You get detention again for smoking weed in the bathrooms?”

Reed cackled, nodding triumphantly. He started to walk away but after a second he backtracked quickly, switching the platter to his left hand,“By the way, I was supposed to somehow get this note on that Cookie,” he mumbled, fishing something out of his pocket and handing it to Cyrus, “But uh, I was kinda high when I did that too and I tried to bake the note into the cookie. Needless to say, it didn’t work, so I thought I’d just hand it to ya. Bye kid!”

He probably should’ve expected that.

'To show ultimate loyalty’ -Mystery man

——————————

Two hours Later, a very tired boy was sitting at a table, head down with a massive headache.

As cute as this was, and it really was cute, Cyrus couldn’t figure out for the life of him how he was supposed to find this boy.

All throughout the night, there were people giving him notes. It almost seemed like the whole school was in on it! When he had gone to get pictures with Andi and Buffy, Amber (she was taking the pictures for extra credit in journalism class) gave him the pictures with the note somehow already written on the back!

It had said, “I can give you what you what.” -Mystery Man

And not to mention, can you guess how was talking to her after they left? That’s right! Fancy tux guy himself.

He felt a pout slide on his face as he rearranged the pieces of paper on the tablecloth. It was easy to tell that the poem wasn’t written by any Edgar Allen Poe, or maybe it was because Edgar kinda sucked at love poems. And yes, the poem wasn’t the most creative thing, but it was still sweet.

He liked the most recent pieces he got from Walker and Jonah that said

'It’s all I want to do’ -mystery man

And 'I will sweep you off your feet’ -Mystery Man. They didn’t seem like much on their own, but it sounded like the poem was coming to an end. Maybe he could finally figure out who his Prince Charming was!

“Are you getting worn out?”

The shorter boys head popped up, with a smile. It was TJ! Accept, when he made eye contact, it wasn’t. It was fancy man…

'I must be hallucinating.’ He huffed

“What? Not happy to see me?”

“No, I just thought you were someone else,” Cyrus said with his most respectful smile. He didn’t want to make the one person that might actually like him, feel bad.

“And who would that be?”

His voice almost sounded hopeful and happy, even though Cyrus wasn’t talking about him. And he knew that.

“My friend TJ. I wanted to talk to him tonight.”

He gave a nod a stood up from his chair. For an odd second, Cyrus panicked because he though tux guy was gonna leave him alone, instead he walked up to him and held out his hand. “How about I distract you for a bit? I like this song.”

A sigh a relief exited his mouth as he got up with a slight hop in his step. If he spent time with the taller boy, maybe he could figure out who it was.

Cyrus was absolutely burning red as Mystery Man put his hands and his waist. He was hesitant to put his arms around the other boy’s neck, but when he smiled at him encouragingly, Cyrus relaxed and slotted his hands behind the taller boys head.

The Smile seemed strangely familiar, which was easily a sign that he knew this person, but who’s smile was it? Cyrus titled his head slightly, observing the other boys facial features. He felt as if the name was on the tip of his young, but it got swept away as Mystery man started to speak.

“Any clue who I am yet?” He nudged on.

The dark haired boy rolled his eyes at the irony and giggles, “I would if you didn’t interrupt my thinking process.”

“My whole goal tonight is to distract you. I’m glad I’m succeeding.” Something seemed a bit off about that. Why would Cyrus need to be distracted?

“What do you mean?” He prodded.

“If you weren’t distracted, I wouldn’t be able to finish this part of the plan.” Mystery man spun Cyrus around, letting him expand to the edges of the dance floor, the grabbing him again and pulling him closer than before. “Nobody else is dancing, cutie.” He whispered, sending shivers down Cyrus’ spine.

He looked around frantically realizing that he and the taller boy were, in fact, the only people on the dance floor. Everyone else was standing around the edge, smiling at them.

He noticed a very energetic Buffy and Andi standing at the front of the crowd giving him a thumbs up, but it barely made him feel less nervous.

“Who did you say you were looking for again?” Although Cyrus was somehow positive that he remembered the name, he repeated himself.

“My friend TJ kippen…” he murdered, flushing at the realization that TJ could very well be watching him from the crowd.

“And why can’t you find him again?”

“Well everyone is wearing masks…it would be hard to spot him in the crowd.”

“You know,” he started, leaning in closer, “I’ve never understood how people can’t recognize a friend under a mask.”

Why did that sound so familiar?

“I mean, if you’re close enough, you should be able to tell easily.”

Where in the hell had he heard that before?

“Do you think you could do that for me underdog? Do you think you could look slightly closer?”

Cyrus had almost missed it. But with the close proximity, every word that was being conveyed and processed, was clear as water.

And then, he looked closer.

“TJ..?”

The taller boy stayed silent for a moment, then smiled nervously.

“I heard you talking about a dream, for someone to love you at every seem.

A boy to treat you like royalty, to show ultimate loyalty. I can give you what you want, it’s all I want to do. Thanks for looking closer so I can say that I love you.”

He took a hand off of Cyrus’ waist and untied his own mask, gripping it in his hand as it pulled away.

“Yeah…I know it’s cheesy.” He sighed, “But I wanted to give you your Cinderella story.”

Cyrus was dumbfounded as he studied the other boys face. Just to double check, that yes, standing in front of him, holding his waist, confessing his feelings, was TJ kippen. His best friend.

Cyrus retracted his hands, pulling his mask off with a small tug.

He felt his cheeks dampen, overwhelmed with happiness.

“Maybe it was.” He whispered, “But at least it was from you.”

He stood up on his toes, closing the distance, and moving his lips along TJ’s.

The entire room erupted in cheer and Cyrus found it hard not to break the kiss by smiling entirely too much.

—————THE END—————

Thanks so much for reading this! I had a masquerade ball idea in the drafts so quite a while, so I decided I would finally write it. 💗

[couturecannibal]

tagged by @galaxy-of-hair​!!!! thanks dude (￣▽+￣*)♥

Rules: Put your music on shuffle and list the first ten twenty songs, then tag ten twenty people.

1. World ♥ Princess by Grimes

2. Clap Your Hands by Sia

3. Coming Down by Halsey

4. Screen by top

5. From Finner by Of Monsters and Men

6. Kill the DJ by Green Day

7. Fragments of Time by Daft Punk

8. Miss Atomic Bomb by The Killers

9. Always by p!atd

10. Bassoon Concerto in B Flat Major/ La Notte by Antonio Vivaldi (theres always gotta be at least one concerto lmao)

11. Love Game by Lady Gaga

12. Boyfriend by Tegan and Sara

13. Bitter Divisions by Against Me!

14. Lions in Cages by Wolf Gang

15. Big Freeze by Muse

16. Red Sea from the prince of egypt soundtrack

17. Implicit Demand for Proof by top

18. Dancing in the Street by David Bowie

19. We Prick You - David Bowie

20. Roman Reloaded - Nicki Minaj

shit uh idk 20 people to tag. @sanguinebensolo @cowboykylux @redarkspawned @dead--stars @deadlyspace @prepschoolpunk @unfortunateseriesof @misterscratch @enyoung 

yall dont have to do this of course,, and if anyone who wasnt tagged wants to go for it!! 

[legendsmag]

Working in the Legends office, with that majestic laminated press badge, often puts you into the heart of the action. This has proven itself a few times over my decade long career under the Legends Magazine press circuit. None of my simple hour-long interview assignments, however, have ever yielded such unexpected and high-density results. That's exactly what happened when I sat down with four-piece Pop/RnB group PHASES, to discuss their new place on the Top Ten chart, their poor reputation as a band, and the future of their work.

Let this be a warning that should you ever approach a group of twenty-somethings with the reputations that a Punk fifteen-year-old might look up to, they will quickly derail any conversation into sexually transmitted diseases, murder, and namedropping the celebrities that they'd like to sleep with.

PHASES just recently experienced it's first-ever Top Ten single, despite having been releasing quite regularly. How does it feel to have finally made it into the top of the chart?

Marco Right: “I’ve spent a lot of time calling out the chart and how little it means to the people on it. So it seems really backwards for me to then say ‘this is so important to us, it means so much’ but the truth is that it does for us. We’re still a pretty small band, especially in comparison to the other people on that chart. So having that kind of recognition helps us by allowing us to continue releasing music.

Ace Lafleur: “It really gives some sort of validation that I didn’t think I needed. We enjoy the music we create and we know our fans do as well but to finally be getting recognized for it on a bigger scale is something I, personally, never expected. But it’s great. The more people that hear our music, and like it the more we can do in the future.”

M: “I mean, Essence Woods - uh, Penny Lane: they’re gonna keep releasing music anyway. Whether they get into the top or not. But it really makes a world of difference to us.”

Bowie Hendrix: “I agree with [Marco]*, on the whole, calling out the chart thing--it really just seems more like a popularity contest most of the time more than anything, but [expletive]**, being on it? Finally being /apart/ of the popularity contest? Feels pretty amazing, because like Ace and [Marco]* said, we’re a small band and this isn’t something we expected, but it means exposure, it means more people knowing our music and perhaps connecting to it, and honestly that’s huge.”

Are there any reservations about being in the Top Ten?

A: “Other than the pop stars of the world sending their hitman out to get us? No. Not for me at least.”

B: “I’m a little worried that Austin Harper is going to slit my throat in my sleep now, but otherwise, nah.”

Ezra Addams: “I feel like just saying that is going to make him sic a hitman on us.”

M: “Not if I get him first. Austin Harper: square up.” †

A: “Bowie and Ezra would like that too much. Those Camisado fangirls.”

B: “Yes, actually, being murdered by Austin Harper is my kink.”

E: “Now Essence Woods is gonna kill us, too.  Thanks for that.”

M: “That happened in a dream I had. She can call me if she wants to, we can chat about it.”

A: “Now that’s a terrifying thought. Having to interact with Essence about anything ever.”

E: “I like being played on the radio so love you Austin and Essence and Penny! Don’t listen to them.”

A: “Suck up”

B: “I mean, if Austin would let me, I’d [expletive] something of his, if you know what I mean.”

A: “Maybe after Essence steals all his money and ruins his life you can have your way with him. Just wait like six months.”

M: “If they’re ever feeling adventurous, I’m on call.”

E: “I can’t wait to see who husband number three is gonna be after she sucks this one dry of all the money and runs.”

M: “I’m broke as [expletive]  but I got a great life insurance policy. Let’s give this a shot.”

E: “What he’s trying to say is /Essence/ - whenever you’re looking for husband number three Marco is here and ready. We love attention.”

The band seems infamous for the lyrical content of your music, with protests happening outside of some shows. Which of course is amplified because of the kinds of reputations that each of the band’s members has. Do you ever feel like you're glamorizing drug use and casual sex?

A: “We’re not your cookie cutter boy band looking to become the next role model. We write what we know and what our fans know and if other people relate to it that’s great. But as far as glamorizing it? No. I don’t think that’s what we’re doing at all.”

E: “If people take it as glamorizing, then there is very little we can do about that. We're not telling anyone to actually do drugs. Most of our listeners are adults who are more than capable of making their own decisions.”

M: “In order to glamorize it, we would have to be talking about how cool it is. We don’t do that. We’re too busy talking about other shit that just so happens to involve that stuff. I think there have been quite a few lines where we straight out say that it’s a bad idea. So I don’t know how we would be glamorizing it.”

B: “What’s that Love, Actually quote? “Don’t do drugs, become a pop star and they give them to you for free”? I feel like that would be glamorizing. We’re just writing about what may or may not be our own personal experiences with those things, not telling other people to go out and follow our leads. Which, to be honest: 3/10, would not recommend.”

What would you say to people who protest at your shows or Twitter users who think that your band is "problematic"?

A: “Thanks for the free publicity? No, seriously. The people who protest, they’ve heard the music clearly or they wouldn’t make the signs with our lyrics on them with those giant x’s. So whether they like us or not, they’re still adding to that total spin count. So thanks to the haters. We appreciate you.”

M: “I personally enjoy the entertainment. It’s a lot of fun to have a huge group of people outside who are ready and willing to stare you down and have it out, face-to-face. How many people can say that people travel all sorts of distances to protest them? But as far as what I would say? Probably thanks. And also: [expletive] you.”

A: “I thought you weren’t just [expletive] whoever anymore Marco?”

M: “It’s a different kind of [expletive]. It’s like a hate [expletive], but more loathsome.”

B: “What the [expletive] is more loathsome than a hate [expletive]?? But listen, okay, protests just draw more attention, and I don’t really give a [expletive] what some bored mom on Twitter thinks of us. Bad publicity is still publicity, babe, and it’s still giving us views and listens and putting our name in people’s mouths. At the end of the day, I feel like it does us more good than ill.”

The last single was "NUMB TO THE FEELING", and this new single is "LIKE A ROCKSTAR". Both of which are still heavily describing drug use as a coping mechanism for things like anxiety and depression. So what exactly is the lesson that you hope for younger listeners to take away from these releases?

A: “I didn’t start creating music in the hopes of guiding the youth of tomorrow.”

B: “I would be terrified of you as a role model, honestly.”

A: “What? I’d be a great role model!”

B: “Kids, don’t listen to your uncle Ace, okay. Just don’t ever do the [expletive] he does.”

M: “I hope that they learn an important lesson, which is: stop buying the pop [expletive] and just buy our record instead. It’s cool as [expletive]. Your friends will love it.”

B: “Listen, people deal with shit in their own way, right? And sometimes that way isn’t [expletive] healthy or whatever, but it’s still a coping mechanism and you do what you have to do to get through tough [expletive]. We’re not, like we said, glamorizing drug use - but if this is what works for us, then who the [expletive] are any of you to tell us differently?”

M: “On a more serious note, I do think that there’s probably some misconceptions about how kids begin to take an interest in just checking out. Music isn’t really the thing that does it. Most of the time there are some really serious things going on and for whatever reason, they’re not being offered alternatives. I would hope that if people are actually listening to pick this [expletive] apart, then they’ll pick that apart, too.”

B: “Thank you for putting that much more eloquently than I could, you extreme show-off.”

E: “On another serious note - we’re not your babysitters. Talk to your kids about drugs if you don’t want them to do drugs.”

Because so much of PHASES comes from personal experience, what will the band sound like once you get married, have kids, or "settle down"?

A: “Oh [expletive]. Sorry, Ezra. I didn’t realize you got divorced”

E: “I’m married, not dead. We sound the same because being married doesn’t mean you’re suddenly boring.”

B: “Did you forget that Ezra is married? Because that man is married as hell. And we still sound like this. So, I feel like that’s part of your answer, right there. Ace is like half-dating MJ Kirsch all the time which would mean they’re basically settled down. We’re gonna sound like this all the time, my dude.”

A: “[expletive] off Bowie. You’re practically married to what’s his face.”

B: “Excuse you, we’ve been broken up for a year, we’re just casually [expletive] at this point.”

M: “Casually [expletive] or not, there’s a very big chance that Bowie will be married and have six kids before the next record hits. And I think that record will sound exactly the same as this one, but hopefully with more references to sex.”

B: “Why am I the one who’s gonna have six kids?? That sounds like my personal hell.”

These singles lead for the next album, but what exactly will come next?

B: “Oh, you know, we thought we’d do a cooking show next. Like a real-life Breaking Bad, show kids how to make drugs. No, I’m kidding. It’s [going to be] more music.”

A: “Rehab.”

B: “Oh, wait, I forgot that Ace and MJ are going to make a Disney album together. He’s Prince Eric, she’s Ariel.”

A: “Excuse you. I’m Prince Charming. Get your facts straight”

B: “Yeah, okay, babe, whatever you say. That would make MJ Cinderella, though, and that [expletive] is boring as [expletive]. Let your girlfriend be a cool princess!”

A: “You know what’s boring as [expletive]?”

B: “The fact that you’re still talking?”

A: “[expletive] off.”

M: “They wanna kiss each other so bad, look at them.”

B: “Ace, come here, let me kiss you!!”

A: “Anyone have some mouthwash? I can’t kiss him until he’s been thoroughly disinfected.”

B: “Wow, rude. I currently have no STI’s, thanks.”

A: “That you know of.”

M: “I can confirm for him. He’s clean like one of those little white glove test things.”

B: “You’re my favorite, Marco.”

(At this point, Ezra looks up from his text messaging, which he'd been doing a lot throughout the interview.)

E: “Are you guys still [expletive] talking?”

B: “Ezra! Pay attention to me!”

E: “/Bowie/, [expletive] off.”

A: “Any more questions?”

E: “I have one.”

A: “Then I guess we’re done here.”

E: “That is so mean. I’m nothing but nice to your dumbass.”

A: “Ugh. Fine. What do you want to add, Ezra?”

E: “Where are we going to eat when we get out of here?”

A: “I thought that’s what you were doing on your phone this whole time! You weren’t ordering us food? [expletive]!”

E: “If I was ordering food it’d just be for me. I don’t like you guys that much.”

The new single from PHASES, "LIKE A ROCKSTAR" is out wherever digital music is sold or streamed July 6.

* Multiple times during the interview, Bowie Hendrix made the decision to call Marco Right "Marcus", which may be fundamentally confusing for readers.

** The band cursed almost as much as they provided responses. The uncensored interview in its entirety can be read in the printed issue.

† Legends Magazine does not agree with or condone any speech, threats, or actions taken by any person interviewed or featured within its publication.

[wp-yahoo-style-1042-yahoopa-blog]

It Looks Like Men’s Chokers Will Be a Thing in 2017

Men’s chokers are happening, it seems. The 1990s trend (yes, we know it has a long history beyond that) had a strong resurgence in 2016 — for women, that is. Pretty much every female celebrity, including Taylor Swift, Gigi Hadid, Lily-Rose Depp, and Vanessa Hudgens, made it her style staple.

A model walks the runway in a choker during the Louis Vuitton Menswear spring/summer 2017 show at Paris Fashion Week. (Photo: Getty)

But as quickly as they arrived, chokers seem to be on their way out for women’s fashion. The twist is that they’re reemerging for men. Case in point: ASOS has a line of velvet chokers, as Fashionista pointed out. The ubiquitous fabric combines two of 2017’s hottest trends. And ASOS’s chokers seem to be catching on, as the black versions are already sold out.

Have no fear, though: ASOS is also offering man chokers in a suede wraparound design, a red paisley print, studded leather, braided leather, and silver and gold metal. There’s something for every kind of man.

An elaborate men’s choker at the Casely-Hayford show during the London Collections Men SS17. (Photo: Getty)

But it doesn’t stop there. In June, male Louis Vuitton models walked the designer’s spring 2017 Paris runway in chokers, according to the New York Post. The newspaper’s website also pointed out that “Just a week before, in Florence, Raf Simons dressed several looks from his men’s collection — designed in collaboration with the Robert Mapplethorpe Foundation — with elegant-yet-fetishistic collars.” And on the Milan runways, the designers behind Dsquared2 “showed chain-link accents in their David Bowie-indebted catwalk presentation.”

Other designers to send dudes down the runway in chokers have included Casely-Hayford, Gucci, Phillip Lim, and Canalli — and that was in 2016, so obviously this trend has been gearing up to make a splash this year. The online marketplace Etsy, of course, is providing men’s choker options too. A search of the site calls up a wide variety of the accessories for men, including versions made with beads, leather, and stainless steel.

A male model rocks a choker at the Gucci Cruise 2017 runway show. (Photo: Getty)

Some people on the Internet remain skeptical. The Huffington Post claimed that the ’90s fad “is really wearing itself out.” But on Twitter, guys are proudly sporting their choker necklaces. “Thanks to my baby my rockstar look is complete @agjnyc I’m rocking my wire #MensChoker #Punk…” one user wrote, along with a picture of a pencil-thin accessory.

Photo: Thanks to my baby my rockstar look is complete ???? @agjnyc I’m rocking my wire #MensChoker #Punk… http://t.co/5jQm92zvhe

— Prince Allure (@AllURePRiNCe) April 5, 2015

Another simply wrote, “Yeahhh ???” with a thinking emoji. The photo posted does make you think, as the guy looks pretty great, we have to admit.

Yeahhh ??? #menschoker ???? pic.twitter.com/IwWgJx3qn6

— ⚡️ (@joshhmadeit) October 13, 2016

Matt Lauer even gave the trend a try — on live television. “CHokers for men are a thing now too. ASOS has a wide selection of male chokers, some in velvet and others in cotton,” he said. But, as Lauer noted, “they’re late to the game because, guys, I have been wearing a choker for years.”

Matt Lauer loves chokers. (Photo: NBC)

Last April, Fashionista interviewed style icon Alexa Chung, who declared that we need to give up on chokers — but only if we want to. She said, “Oh my God, the choker is so dead. No, thank you. (Laughs) No, it’s fine. Look, everyone can do whatever they want, but I do think there is a certain thing with trends when they reach a tipping point and that tipping point to me, with the choker, seems to have happened a few months ago. But they look cool, so, get it!”

It seems ladies were listening, and passed off the choker baton to guys. May they wear them well, wear them out, and usher in a new throwback accessory for 2018.

Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and Pinterest for nonstop inspiration delivered fresh to your feed, every day.

[arg-machine]

Now playing: music at machine HQ

Although he doesn’t watch television much, arg is aware of various singing contests where participants try to… well, outsing one another. They are then judged by experts who choose a winner, upon whom prizes and praise are lavished, and a good time is apparently had by all… all except arg, that is.

From whatever little of such shows he has watched, it seems to arg that all the participants of such shows sing equally well and the winner, frequently, is only marginally better than the rest. In other words, you have a contest where everyone is a good at what they do and this, after a while, becomes quite boring to arg. You know they will all sing well: so where’s the variety – or fun – in that, he asks.

So good reader, arg has this theory: he thinks a show that pits bad singers against one another – and picks the worst of them as the grand winner – would be much more interesting. Think about it: there aren’t too many ways a song can be sung well, but there are so many ways it can be sung badly – one can sing out of tune, or out of time, or mumble and not pronounce the words clearly… and then there’s that all-time favourite: the bad voice.

And when you combine these, you get infinite variety: you can sing or mumble out of tune, you can sing out of time and have a bad voice, have a bad voice and sing out of tune. Or sing out of tune and out of time... with a bad voice!  Endless possibilities, in other words.

You may ask, “Dude! What’s the point of this irrelevant digression?” Well, the point is that this here post is about music and, like last time, that introduction was just an attempt to disguise the fact that owing to a scarcity of original content, arg has decided to blog about the jams he’s been grooving to lately. And fear not – they all feature some great singing...

Music @machine HQ When not making original music, arg likes to listen his favourite jams while he works. Usually, he does this with Internet radio, though there are times when he prefers to “utilize his own resources” and play stuff from his personal, old-school music stash. And below are some of the music that has been playing at machine HQ.

Note: There are several websites [last.fm and YouTube, among others for instance] and web services that will let you listen to the music listed below, though be advised that not all this content is available everywhere. You can also listen to this music via online radio stations dedicated to specific genres and artists. Meanwhile, links to websites offering more information about each album have been provided where possible.

As far as arg can recall, the first proper rock/metal album he purchased way back when he was in school was Blackout by the Scorpions; the very first album he ever bought was Prince’s Purple Rain, followed closely by Thriller by Michael Jackson. Anyway, here are the albums machine HQ has been rockin’ to lately:

Animals – Pink Floyd 

Master of Reality – Black Sabbath

The Game – Queen

Metal Works ’73-’93 – Judas Priest [anthology]

High Voltage – AC/DC

Live After Death – Iron Maiden

Eliminator – Z.Z. Top

Live in San Francisco – Joe Satriani

Undertow – Tool

Thrall: Demonsweatlive – Danzig

Mutter – Rammstein

A Change of Seasons – Dream Theater

Astro Creep 2000 – White Zombie

A Vulgar Display of Power – Pantera

Cereal Killer Soundtrack – Green Jelly

Traveling Wilburys Vol. 1 and Vol. 3 – Bob Dylan, George Harrison, Jeff Lynne, Roy Orbison and Tom Petty

Love and Theft – Bob Dylan

Abbey Road – The Beatles

Moondance – Van Morrison

Low – David Bowie

Tubular Bells – Mike Oldfield

Classic Yes – Yes [anthology]

No Quarter – Jimmy Page & Robert Plant

Wandering Spirit – Mick Jagger

Pump – Aerosmith

While arg got into blues music at about the same time as rock/metal, jazz arrived a bit later while he was in college, with two albums he bought the same week: Duke Ellington and Louis Armstrong: The Complete Sessions and Kind of Blue by Miles Davis. Later, of course, he realised that these two albums can very well serve as milestones representing two landmark eras of the genre: the old-school swing music period and its more modern, musically-adventurous days. But here’s what’s been playing at machine HQ over the last few weeks:

A Love Supreme – John Coltrane

Amandla – Miles Davis

Double Rainbow: The Music of Antonio Carlos Jobim – Joe Henderson

Black Market – Weather Report

Dis Is da Drum – Herbie Hancock

Did You Feel That? – Joe Sample and the Soul Committee

Brown Rice – Don Cherry

The Heart of Things – John McClaughlin

Atlantic Jazz Flutes – Various artists

The Road to You: Recorded Live in Europe – Pat Metheny

With the Tenors of Our Time – Roy Hargrove Quintet

Aja – Steely Dan

Live at Winterland – The Jimi Hendrix Experience

Muddy Waters: King of the Electric Blues [anthology]

Live at Carnegie Hall – Stevie Ray Vaughan and Double Trouble

American Music, Texas Style – Clarence “Gatemouth” Brown

Hooker 'n Heat – John Lee Hooker [with Canned Heat]

Blues Summit – B.B. King [with various artists]

Blues Breakers – John Mayall with Eric Clapton

J.J. Cale Live – J.J. Cale

Blues Roots – Klaus Doldinger’s Passport [with Johnny C. Copeland]

Live in NYC ’97 – Johnny Winter

The Best of Ray Charles: The Atlantic Years – Ray Charles [anthology]

Being so far from the source, arg – like many in a similar predicament – experienced rap/hip hop only in the early 1990s, courtesy of Yo! MTV Raps and MC Hammer. A digression: even more than Hammer’s worldwide hit U Can’t Touch This, it is this funky parody of it that arg still remembers vividly. Despite the intervening years, the parody – titled I Can’t Watch This and available on this fine album – remains a favourite, given the sad state of local media and television. Anyway, here are some funky discs that have been playing at machine HQ:

Universal Masters Collection: Classic James Brown – James Brown [anthology]

Innervisions – Stevie Wonder

Sign o' the Times – Prince

Muggs Presents… The Soul Assassins Chapter One – Various artists

2001 – Dr. Dre

Jazzmatazz Vol. 1 – Guru [with various artists]

Me Against the World – Tupac Shakur

Ready to Die – Notorious B.I.G

Murder Was the Case [The Soundtrack] – Snoop Dog [with various artists]

Tical – Method Man

The Score – Fugees

Blowout Comb – Digable Planets

Flesh of My Flesh Blood of My Blood – DMX

Black Sunday – Cypress Hill

License to Ill – Beastie Boys

Panique Celtique – Manau

Vivid – Living Color

Blood Sugar Sex Magik – Red Hot Chili Peppers

Above the Rim – Various artists [original soundtrack]

Q’s Jook Joint – Quincy Jones [with various artists]

Funky Divas – En Vogue

The Definitive Collection – The Blues Brothers [anthology]

Respect: The Soundtrack to the Soul Generation – Various artists 

The 1990s were exciting times. Musically, it saw at least three genres explode and gain popularity globally: hip hop, grunge and electronica. And though electronic music wasn’t new – Switched on Bach [1968] by Wendy/Walter Carlos is generally regarded as one of the first totally-electronic albums – the growing ubiquity of affordable computers and the progresses made in digital technology led to a huge variety of electronic music being produced in that decade. Here are some of the electronica and pop albums arg has been listening to…

The Man-Machine – Kraftwerk

Outside – David Bowie

Temperamental – Everything but the Girl

The Fat of the Land – The Prodigy

Blue Lines – Massive Attack

In Sides – Orbital

Surrender – The Chemical Brothers

Dummy – Portishead

Electro Glide in Blue – Apollo 440

Homework – Daft Punk

XTRMNTR – Primal Scream

You've Come a Long Way, Baby – Fatboy Slim

Odelay – Beck

Debut – Bjork 

Travelling Without Moving – Jamiroquai

The Acid House – Various artists [original soundtrack]

Massive Attack vs Mad Professor: No Protection – Massive Attack and Mad Professor

Out There and Back – Paul van Dyk

Connected – Stereo MCs

Behaviour – Pet Shop Boys

The Soul Cages – Sting

Ray of Light – Madonna

HIStory: Past, Present and Future, Book I – Michael Jackson

Tales of Mystery and Imagination: Edgar Allan Poe – The Alan Parsons Project

Universal Masters Collection: Classic Tears for Fears – Tears for Fears [anthology]

The album that defines the idea of a popular “world music” album for arg – though that term was yet to be invented when the album was released, or when he listened to it first – is Paul Simon’s Graceland. The album remains a personal favourite and hardly a week goes by when he doesn’t give it a spin. Good vibes. And while combining musical elements from diverse cultures has been a regular practice in jazz since the 1960s, it acquired a certain pop gloss – and a new name: world music – much later, in the 1980s and 1990s.

Back then, EMI records launched Hemisphere, a world music imprint that released a series of albums showcasing indigenous music from various parts of the world. Needless to say, arg loved these albums and acquired as many of them as he could. And now, here are some of the albums played recently:

Passion – Peter Gabriel

Passion – sources – Various artists

Message from Home – Pharoah Sanders

Dragon's Kiss – Marty Friedman

The Light of The Spirit – Kitaro

Mickey Hart's Mystery Box – Mickey Hart

Deep Forest – Deep Forest

Equal Rights – Peter Tosh

Exodus – Bob Marley and the Wailers

Ska Island – Various artists

Viva Santana! – Santana [anthology]

Rapsody: Hip Hop Meets World – Various artists

Music for The Native Americans – Robbie Robertson and the Red Road Ensemble

The Long Black Veil – The Chieftains [with various artists]

The Best of Youssou N'Dour – Youssou N'Dour [anthology]

Voices of The Real World – Various artists

Conversations – L. Subramaniam and Stephane Grappelli

Mustt Mustt – Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan [with Michael Brook]

Hemisphere: Reggae Africa – Various artists

Hemisphere: Sif Safaa – New Music from the Middle East – Various artists

Hemisphere: Brazil Blue – Various artists

Hemisphere: South Africa – Only the Poorman Feel It – Various artists

Note: Apart from the music listed above, a number of orchestral pieces have also been heard at machine HQ, courtesy of online radio stations devoted to such music. Bach remains a favourite, as do Mozart, Beethoven, Wagner, Chopin, Tchaikovsky and a few others...

And that, good reader, brings us to the end of this post about music at machine HQ. Thanks for reading, and don’t forget to check out The Apocalypse Project on twitter and here on tumblr.

[robbiefarlow-sidequestfitne-blog]

New Post has been published on Side Quest Fitness

New Post has been published on http://sidequestfitness.com/genius-justin-timberlake-futuresexlovesounds/

The Genius Story Hidden within the Lyrics of Justin Timberlake's FutureSex/LoveSounds

FutureSex/LoveSounds, Justin Timberlake’s sophomore release, single handily changed the face of pop music for the next decade.

And on top of its four Grammy nominations—Timberlake won two for Best Dance Recording and Best Rap/Sung Collaboration—the album solidified Timberlake as “The Prince of Pop.”

The tracks on FutureSex/LoveSounds cover everything the modern male experiences while pursuing love: infatuation, seduction, sex, and heartbreak. But Timberlake’s second album isn’t just a collection of libidinous tunes.

Within the lyrics is hidden a pop opera that follows the story of one character’s night out at a club—each song acting as a snapshot within a larger photo mosaic. And when viewed as a complete story, Timberlake’s second album makes a powerful comment on the influence of sexual fantasy.

Now.

Before I jump into the story hidden within this album, I need to, as Timberlake says: “paint you a picture,” about what transpired before FutureSex/LoveSounds came into existence. Here’s the TL;DR:

After leaving ‘NSYNC, and releasing his first solo album, Justified, Timberlake felt “burnt out” with the music scene. So he became an actor.

But somewhere around the mid-2000’s Timberlake became upset with the state of pop music, and decided to rekindle his relationship with Timbaland for his next record.

Off the movie screen, and back in the studio, Timberlake (and Timbaland) pulled influence for the next album from artists like Prince, David Bowie, The Strokes, Coldplay, The Killers, and David Byrne (The Talking Heads).

Here’s where it gets super interesting. Minus the one song Timberlake recorded with Rick Rubin, JT didn’t write down a single lyric on paper—every lyric on the album was improvised.

“Everybody knows he’s talented, but this dude wrote that whole album without touching a pen or paper. I’m like, ‘What type of shit is this?’ I’ve heard stories about Jay-Z or Biggie doing that, but I’ve never heard of a singer doing that. I think it’s some sort of superpower.” – Danja Rolling Stone 2006 Cover Story interview

Of course, Timberlake claims that FutureSex/LoveSounds was not autobiographical; but he admits that he did draw on some personal experiences. So if he improvised the entire album, sans a solitary song, where did the inspiration for these lyrics come from?

It’s All About Sex

There’s something visceral about sexual fantasies. And in a study from 2007, scientists from the Department of Personality, Evaluation and Psychological Treatment of the University of Granada found that in men’s imaginations (or sexual fantasies) heighten their sex drive. But what happens when you become everyone’s fantasy? Do your fantasies change when you could have anyone you desire?

Fame isn’t an easy burden to bear. And in Timberlake’s case, his level of fame opened the chance for him to have any woman (or man) he wanted. JT was and still is, a sexual fantasy for thousands of people worldwide.

But there’s no excitement in that; there’s no thrill of the chase. And that’s what fame robbed from Timberlake. And that’s what FutureSex/LoveSounds is all about: If Timberlake can’t have fantasy in real life, why not set out to create that story and tell it with music.

The Future is Filled with the Sounds of Sex

The first track and the album title share the same name. And when you examine the lyrics from a distance, what you hear is the story of the singer’s infatuation with a woman that he’s attempting to woo. Justin’s steamy vocals that invoke a sense of fantasized sexual exploits kicks off the album (and the night within the larger story).

However, this fantasy isn’t happening on the dance floor. This fantasy is carried out in Timberlake’s mind before he even gets to the club; he’s at work, or on his way home from a long workweek, and dreaming of the night that’s ahead of him. His hope is that tonight—the future—ends with sex and the sounds of love. Before he’s ever set foot in the club, Timberlake is already dreaming of “what might be.”

And that’s what the title track, FutureSex/LoveSound, is all about: imagination.

Bring that SexyBack

What do you think about when you hear the word sexy? Do you conjure images of sultry and seductive men or women in your mind? That’s what you assumed the first released track off of FutureSex/LoveSounds was all about, right? Being “sexy?”

Critics thought the same thing. But because they’re too wrapped up in their own self-indulgence, they missed what the song is really about. It isn’t about sex. SexyBack is about confidence. And not just his confidence, but the confidence he shares with his posse that evening.

“Justin [Timberlake] goes in the chorus ‘Go head be gone with it’, I called the song ‘Be Gone With It’, just to label it. So they’re developing this song and they’re going nuts and loving it, and as they play it, and I’m like: ‘I don’t think this hook is strong enough.’ But then, at the very last minute, Justin very, very cleverly decided to call it ‘Sexyback‘, and that changed the whole dimension of the song. The first thing you hear when you listen to the song is ‘I’m bringing sexy back’, and after that you don’t care or don’t notice that there is no hook. And then there’s the unique thing of Timbaland acting as a narrator, saying things like ‘take it to the bridge’, or ‘yeah’. Every time Justin leaves a space, he fills it in. It’s two guys interacting.”

You’re so money, baby. So money.

SexyBack is that part of the night where Timberlake’s character is getting ready for the club: he’s got a new shirt, shoes, a sleek jacket that makes him look and feel amazing. He’s more confident than he’s ever been.

It doesn’t matter who else is in the club or what they’re wearing—he looks better than every motherfucker there. He’s got swagger that screams, “All you ‘Situation wannabes’ better get ready cause tonight, I’m the King of the club; I might even take the girl you’re dancing with.”

(He hits us with a little foreshadowing here as the idea that Timberlake can take any girl he wants becomes interesting later on since he becomes a victim of this very thing.)

Storytelling Elements of FutureSex/LoveSounds

Music has been used to tell stories since the first caveman slapped his knee in rhythm and grunted out a tale around the fire. And over the centuries, musicians have experimented with storytelling elements within their work.

And Timberlake continued that trend by using preludes and interludes on FutureSex/LoveSounds. A prelude is a piece of music that works as an introduction to a more important movement within the piece. And interludes are pieces that separate parts of a song or acts in a play.

On this album, the preludes/interludes provide a unique musical experience not seen on pop albums of the time.

But in the context of the club story, they act as transitions. And the” Let Me Talk To You Prelude” transition is about Timberlake and Timbaland designating their “loves” for the night, which acts as a set-up for the most important aspect of contemporary male relationship pursuits: the chase—the most playful of all sexual fantasies.

My Love

The chase has begun at the start of “My Love.” And it’s here that Timberlake’s fantasies start to accelerate.

Lyrically, JT is falling hard. He’s beginning to build long term fantasies like holding her hand on the beach, vacationing in the countryside, and making her his lady. Whatever pheromones are oozing out of this mystery woman on the dance floor, they’re making Timberlake lovesick.

All the sexiness that he brought back earlier, that peacock like confidence he exuded, seems to disappear when Timberlake pleads through the lyrics for his love to, “don’t give [it] away.” But she isn’t giving him a sign of her plans. That’s why T.I. says, “I don’t know what she hesitatin’ for, man,” right before he goes into his rap.

Timberlake is drunk; not on booze, but on his infatuation with this woman at the club. And thus begins the next track, with its own interlude:” Lovestoned/I Think She Knows.”

Stoned by a Gorgon

Like Medusa, the woman JT’s been dancing and flirting with has him stoned (by love). And as she continues to tantalize and fan the flames of Timberlake’s fantasies with the movement of her body, Justin’s only thought is: I hope she’s goin’ home with me tonight.

Natalie Portman?

The woman in the song can read Timberlake like a book, though. She knows he’s in love. And so his heart begins to race with anticipation; this plays out in the song around the four-minute mark when most of the instrumentation drops out, and all that’s left is a simple strum of some strings, the percussion of hand drums, and the beatboxing exhales of Timberlake.

Schadenfreude

And then, Timberlake hits us with an interlude that turns the story on its head. The two tracks in the middle of FutureSex/LoveSounds interrupt Timberlake’s building sexual tension by drastically changing the tone and mood. And you can feel this shift from anticipation to trepidation in the first interlude.

The end of the first act of our story ends with “What Goes Around…” and the second interlude “…Comes Around.”

Instead of going home with the girl he’d been flirting and dancing with all night, she leaves him for someone better (someone who brought more sexy back). So what does JT do?

Well, like any heartsick 20-something, all Timberlake can wish for in this instance is a little schadenfreude. And that’s what happens at the end of What Goes Around: Timberlake dreams up, “paints this picture,” of what’s going to happen in the future with this douchebag his “love” dumped him for.

You spend your nights alone And he never comes home And every time you call him All you get’s a busy tone I heard you found out That he’s doin’ to you what you did to me Ain’t that the way it goes

And it’s here where the tone of the album, and Timberlake’s character, completely shifts again.

Rebound: Get Back in the Game

The second act of our story opens with “Chop Me Up,” the most aggressive track on the album. And in the context of “one night at the club,” where this track falls makes sense: Timberlake has decided it’s best to head back and convene with his boys and reorganize his plan of attack. Because either he can head home alone and jerk off in a pool of his own tears about the girl he didn’t get, or he can dust himself off and get back in the game.

Timberlake decides to get back in the game. But this time, he’s approaching it differently; his demeanor has completely changed, and his attitude is far more braggadocio. (This is reflected in the rap lyrics of his boys Timbaland and Three 6 Mafia.)

With a new attitude, he’s now found a new “sexy lady” to chase. And he begins tossing out more pick-up lines in “Damn Girl.” And again Timberlake quickly becomes infatuated. He becomes so hypnotized by the leading lady of act two that he equates how he’s feeling to “summer love.”

Let’s Get it On

Summer is short. But like the season, the love created during these months can be sultry. And when it comes to fantasy: hot, steamy, and passionate sex (even if it’s played out in your mind) is some of the most titillating sexual desires you can have.

Once more, Timberlake uses a prelude to set the mood for the rest of the album. Now his fantasy is about to come true as Timberlake is engaging in foreplay with act two’s leading (sexy) lady. The culmination of the night ends with the ballad, “Until the End of Time,” where Timberlake completes his sexual fantasy.

A Wee Stretch

I do have to make one small stretch here. Technically, “Losing My Way’ is about a documentary Timberlake saw on meth; but, in the context of a night at the club, it “can” fit into the overall narrative of the album.

Viewed as a conversation the next morning with his boys from the club, “Losing My Way,” is Timberlake confessing that he’s tired of the club scene. His actions from the previous night, and what rejection turned him into, don’t define the “man” that he wants to be.

I used to be the man in my hometown Until I started to lose my way It all goes back to when I dropped outta school Having fun, I was living the life But now I got a problem with that little white rock See I can’t put down the pipe

He doesn’t like who he becomes at the club. It’s as if he’s a drug addict—a meth head. He’s lost himself in the trance-like world of clubs and hookups, and he’s ready for a change. All he wants to do is, “take all those wrongs and make them right.”

And for Timberlake, it starts with the girl he slept with last night.

I’m Not the Man You Think I Am

Overwhelmed by the guilt of his actions from the previous night, Timberlake calls the girl he hooked up with and explains his actions from the previous night to her. All of it.

Timberlake felt something for this girl, and in “(Another Song) All Over Again” he’s laying his heart out for her, letting her know that if she will give him a chance, he can show her the man he truly is.

…if you would let me try to love you So please give me another chance to write you another song and take back those things I’ve done Cause I’ll give you my heart if you would let me start all over again

The Outro

Musically, FutureSex/LoveSounds is a masterpiece; it’s arguably as influential and game changing, if not better than Thriller. On one album, Timberlake infused nearly every genre on Earth: funk, rock, new wave, gospel, soul, dance/techno, R&B, and more, mixing them together into one cohesive and intoxicating club opera.

The hidden genius behind the album isn’t just in the amalgamation of popular genres of music. Under the guise of a collection of dance-inspired hits, Timberlake crafted a photo mosaic story that comments on the power of sexual fantasy in our lives.

And I’ll be goddamned if this isn’t one of the best works of art ever created. Period.

[coriwilbur-blog]

20 Essential Albums to Take Your Record Collection From Novice to Noble

One thing I have learned from record collecting is that it is a lifelong commitment. One’s record collection is never complete – there is always a record you don’t own. Collecting and acquiring yet another vinyl can become addicting – I am a full-blown addict at this point. However, it can also be an overwhelming process – having to choose between which record to buy makes my head spin.

This is why I have created a list to help make this decision easier, especially if you are fairly novice at the art of vinyl collecting. I have been collecting since I was 16, having been blessed with a substantial starting point from my parents. Over the years, I have expanded their collections exponentially, having delved into further pockets of classic rock they never dared to explore before. In contrast to the direction the majority of other “albums everyone should own” type lists, I tried to avoid the trite, the most popular, the most obvious choices – going for more of a deeper-cut, heavy hitting and unique list of sorts. Here are the 20 albums I think everyone should own.

1. The Beatles - Revolver

As every music junkie knows, from the amateur record collector to classic rock expert, a record collection is not a record collection without The Beatles. No band has been able to surpass them in their music accomplishments and influence. And no one else has come up with an album nearly as good as Revolver – unless maybe the Beatles themselves. But what makes 1966’s Revolver so critical to a vinyl collection is that it marks the point in the Beatles’ work where they began to venture off, expanding their appeal past the hearts of teenage girls. This was where they showed how much more they could offer than just “yeah yeah yeah.” The themes are darker, deeper and wilder than anything they had ever done – including the George Harrison staple “Taxman,” one of Paul McCartney’s greatest achievements “Eleanor Rigby,” the most identifiable Ringo tune “Yellow Submarine” and of course, the show-stopping “Tomorrow Never Knows.”

2. The Beach Boys - Surf’s Up

Sure, sure Pet Sounds is technically the most significant Beach Boys’ work but take a listen to Surf’s Up and you will understand why it is on this list. Think Beach Blanket Babylon meets Kent State University – in fact, there is a song on here about student protests called “Student Demonstration Time.” Since Pet Sounds, the Beach Boys had been moving away from their “surfer” image, taking a similar path as the Beatles circa 1966. “Feel Flows,” a piece created almost entirely by Carl Wilson, paints a dreamy wonderland, ‘enveloping missiles of soul.’ Where all of their traditional Beach Boys sounding albums were light, meant to evoke nothing more than a feeling of endless summer, The track “Surf’s Up” hits you like a high-tide and shows that the water isn’t always surf able and eventually, summer turns into fall. The entire Surf’s Up album allows you to get to know the intellectuals behind the beach bums.

3. Pink Floyd - Wish You Were Here

Pink Floyd is my favorite band of all time and own all but one of their albums, so you can imagine how difficult it was for me to choose the one most critical for an awesome record collection. If you can get your hands on any Floyd album, you’re off to a great start. The obvious choice would definitely be Dark Side of the Moon so I’m going to recommend Wish You Were Here instead. Like, Dark Side – or any Floyd album, really – Wish You Were Here is a concept album, inspired by the mental demise of founding member Syd Barrett. Wish You Were Here is also a giant “fuck you” to record companies – I have a huge soft spot for anything with an anti-establishment message – with the tracks “Welcome to the Machine” and “Have a Cigar.” But the really shining moment is on the title track “Wish You Were Here,” where the band strips down to an uncharacteristically acoustic sound. “We’re just two lost souls swimming in a fishbowl, year after year” laments David Gilmour – so eerie, so dark, so Pink Floyd.

4. David Bowie - Lodger

The third album of Bowie’s “Berlin Trilogy” – who doesn’t love a collaboration with Brian Eno – is also his strongest. (Although, unless you are a devoted Bowie fan down to the core, you may or may not recognize any of the tracks right off the bat). Bowie albums are extremely hard to find for a reasonable price since his death a year ago and what not, so if you are going to splurge on one – pay over $20 for a record – make the purchase count and grab Lodger if you have the pleasure. Truly a “Fantastic Voyage,” 1979’s Lodger showcases Bowie’s musical abilities that no other one of his albums truly does – experimenting with African drum sounds on “African Night Flight” and paying homage to Lou Reed’s obsession with noise at the end of “Boys Keep Swinging.” Other highlights include “Move On,” “Red Sails,” “Look Back in Anger,” “Yassassin,” “DJ,” Repetition” and “Red Money.” Oh wait, oops, I just listed every track. Moral of the story: buy Lodger.

5. Talking Heads - Remain in Light

I am a firm believer that Brian Eno brings out the best in any already other-worldly gifted musician. The last of the three Heads-Eno collab albums, 1980’s Remain in Light was the Talking Head’s effort to prove that the other band members weren’t just back-up for frontman David Byrne. Listening to this album dispels any of such accusations. The commercially successful track is obviously “Once in a Lifetime,” but there’s so much more to this album than meets the eye. “The Great Curve” is the unsung hero here – the entire album a remarkable transition from the late 70s into the 80s. “You may say, this is not my beautiful house,” but why go for what you know, when you can have the Heads at their musical best.

6. Billy Joel - The Stranger

Out of all of the albums on this list, 1976’s The Stranger is one of the only one’s stylistically perfect in essence – seriously, it’s that good. From the get go you can tell this album is something special when you hear the beginning notes of “Movin Out.” And it’s just an upward slope from there, obviously hitting a climax with “Vienna” and “Just the Way You Are.” What’s so good about Billy Joel albums is that he sticks with a concept without being a “Dark Side of the Moon” level of obviousness or complexity – The Stranger is clearly about a young man emancipating himself, struggling to adopt an identity (“The Stranger”), finding masochistic love with a destructive woman (“She’s Always a Woman”) and seeing a dim light at the end of the dismal tunnel that is life (“Everybody Has a Dream”). Optimistically pessimistic is a good way to put it – take “Only the Good Die Young” for example; melding longing and belonging if you will. There is nothing cool about Billy Joel. Actually he’s downright hoaky and well, kind of lame. But there is something about his ability to sing about hopelessness and morbidity in such a hopeful and lively way that gets me going every time. I love him for all of his cheese and splendor; this album is a huge part of the reason why.

7. Steely Dan - Countdown to Ecstasy

I was basically born mandated to love Steely Dan so it was very hard for me to choose which album is “the most important,” but since I am being forced to pick, my vote is for their sophomore work. Countdown to Ecstasy, the follow-up to a seemingly impossible to follow-up Can’t Buy a Thrill, is a remarkable home run. Steely Dan, a band that every parent seems to have had some weird obsession with in the 70s, is way more complex than any music writer’s ability to analyze. Yet, I still find myself able to relate to tracks like “Showbiz Kids” and “My Old School” – the latter more so than any other song in this world. The key is to not try to understand Steely Dan so much as treasure them, just like any other one of your parents’ odd quirks or idiosyncrasies.

8. The Clash - Sandinista!

“The only band that matters,” The Clash’s Sandinista! came out in 1980, a follow-up to London Calling – a  seemingly impossible record to beat. But Sandinista! goes one step further – it is a triple album – creating a whole new level of punk triumph. Sure, the album could be about ten songs shorter but, hell, why should it be? The Clash, who took punk, contorted it into a pretzel and turned anarchy into poetry, proved with this three record masterpiece that they could not be stopped – or at least until Mick Jones’ departure left us with Cut the Crap. Starting off solid with “The Magnificent Seven,” Sandinista! takes you on a wild journey – is the album, punk or reggae? Most of the time the answer is both but honestly, who cares? The band adopted an obsession with ‘dub’ – a form of reggae remixing – and was able to implement some of their previous tracks – “Police & Thieves” – in a new and exciting way. The ultimate stars of the show are obviously “Police On My Back” and “Charlie Don’t Surf,” but there’s so much else in between (and after) that is worth it that you easily lose yourself fand before you know it, you’ve spent the last two plus hours listening to punk rock.

9. Neil Young - Decade

I know the idea of even one triple album seems overwhelming but hear me out. Decade is Neil Young’s Greatest Hits album, so it can be listened to in full, in parts, out of order, however the hell you want to enjoy your Neil. The main point I’m trying to get across is that you need at least one Neil Young album and if you didn’t get graced with a father who worshipped the guy – meaning I have every single one of his albums known to man – you might as well pick one where you can have a collection of most of his best tunes compiled together. “Cinnamon Girl,” “After the Gold Rush,” “Old Man,” “Like a Hurricane,” “Harvest” and of course, “Heart of Gold” are all included. For a dude with such an expansive career, it’s amazing he was able to narrow the album down to just three discs!

10. Prince - Purple Rain

What Beethoven’s 9th Symphony was to him, Purple Rain is to Prince. Single-handedly one of the, if not the, most important pop music achievements to come out of the 80s, Purple Rain is Prince’s magnum opus. Now more than ever, mostly due to the artist’s untimely death last year, people ransack record stores for this album, and nearly pounce on me when I say I uncovered a copy for less than $20. And I’m all for the enthusiasm...obviously. From “When Doves Cry,” “Let’s Go Crazy” and the eponymous “Purple Rain,” to lesser known (but equally great) tracks like “The Beautiful Ones” and “Darling Nikki,” this album is the epitome of Prince’s musical and sexual genius. Not to mention that it is also a soundtrack to the movie of the same name.

11. The Doors - L.A. Woman

Not having acquired the Doors’ self-titled debut, L.A. Woman was going to have to do. And let me tell you, L.A. Woman, ironically their last before Jim Morrison’s untimely death, is better. By the time this album was released, the Doors had been banned from much receiving much airplay due to Morrison’s obscene and erratic behavior. Despite all the scandal, L.A. Woman contains some of the band’s biggest hits – “Love Her Madly,” “L.A. Woman” and “Riders on the Storm.” A concept album of sorts about life and love in Los Angeles, L.A. Woman was a great note for the Morrison-led era to end on, if it had to end.

12. Bee Gees - Bee Gee’s 1st

Long ago, before the dawn of “Saturday Night Fever,” the Bee Gee’s were just another 60s pop band. In fact, they had an extensive career before Tony Manero. Chest hair and disco fever aside, this album is nothing but pure, clean, simple pop music without a doubt – and really good pop music at that. The most notable track is definitely “To Love Somebody,” the song that ultimately put them on the radar in the first place, but there are so many other tunes that are equally as delightful – “Craise Finton Kirk Royal Academy of Arts” and “Close Another Door.” Bee Gee’s 1st is evidence that the Brothers Gibb from down didn’t need to be clad in polyester pants to produce enjoyable music.

13. Funkadelic - Maggot Brain

Is it funk? Is it heavy metal? No, it’s Funkadelic! The god child of George Clinton and a band that refuses to be defined by traditional funk music rules – not that I could define them if I wanted to. Funkadelic’s piece de resistance, Maggot Brain is something from an entirely different universe – two minutes into the opening title track and you will be asking yourself “Who slipped acid into my coffee?” Next you will be saying, “Wait, I didn’t have any coffee! What the fuck is this?” But trust me, when the funk riff of “Can You Get to That” takes hold, you will be glad you joined the Soul Train from Mars.

14. The Rolling Stones - Get Yer Ya Ya’s Out

The only live album on this list, Get Yer Ya Ya’s Out makes you feel like you are actually at a Rolling Stones concert. And boy, is it a great experience. Riding off the wave of Beggar’s Banquet, the Stones released this live compilation before the release of Let it Bleed. Ya Ya’s is everything you could ask in a live album and more – “Jumpin Jack Flash,” “Honky Tonk Woman” and “Sympathy for the Devil” all make appearances. However, it is the nine minute rendition of “Midnight Rambler” with the extended harmonica solo that earned this record a spot on this list above other Stones’ works.

15. The Grateful Dead  - The Grateful Dead

Nearly impossible to get used anymore for a remotely reasonable price, the 1967 debut, self-titled album from the Dead is worth the money, just ask any self-proclaimed Deadhead – I got lucky and acquired this album as a hand-me-down, unbeknownst of its value. Containing the influence of founding member Pigpen, who died in 1972 (RIP), the album comes at you strong from the first track “The Golden Road,” and continues to take you on a splendid, psychedelic journey, ending with a bang on the 10-minute long “Viola Lee Blues.” It’s a wonderful introduction into the “grate” career that was the Dead. Every collection needs at least one of their albums and if you strike gold with a copy of this one, grab it and guard it with your life.

16. Led Zeppelin - Led Zeppelin III

The third installment of the band’s self-titled album series, Led Zeppelin III marked a turning point for them. This was where they began to divert from their heavy metal-esque sound – the genre that happened because of them – and what they created instead was something from an even further away planet than both of the albums that precede it – a place I like to call “Fern Gully Rock” (i.e. “Gallows Pole”). Weirder, rougher and more Lord-of-the-Rings-ish than anything they had ever done up to this point – 1970 to be exact – Led Zeppelin III is the godliest of the holy trinity. What truly makes Led Zeppelin the metaliest of the metal bands is their ability to start an album with something like “Immigrant Song” and then say ‘fuck it’ and follow it with a beautiful work of poetry like “Tangerine.” And let’s not forget the last track on the first side “Since I’ve Been Loving You,” where Jimmy Page literally puts you into a state of hypnosis with his guitar solo. Definitely the most underrated of the four self-titled albums but by no means is it any less magical.

17. The Cars - The Cars

It’s so easy to dismiss The Cars as another “decent” band to come out of the 80s, you forget a couple of things: a) The Cars actually are a part of the late-70s New Wave movement (this debut album came out in 1978) and b) they are clean, tight and innovative musicians – just listen to that riff a la Benjamin Orr from “In Touch With Your World.” This album is almost like a “greatest hits” type compilation, consisting of hit after hit like “Good Times Roll,” “My Best Friend’s Girl” and “Just What I Needed;” the plot twist is that it’s not a “greatest hits” album, but in fact, it is their debut, which put The Cars on the map as punk-new wave pioneers. A part of a movement alongside acts like Blondie and the Talking Heads, it is easy for The Cars to fade into the background. But they shouldn’t and this album will instantly become one of your most played in your collection.

18. Bob Dylan - John Wesley Harding

With so many important works under his belt, from Highway 61 Revisited to Blood on the Tracks, Bob Dylan was obviously going to make an appearance here. John Wesley Harding is definitely way more underrated than it should be. Recorded after his miraculous recovery from that motorcyle accident, John Wesley Harding is more “down to earth” in its lyricism when compared to the wordy nature of his previous albums – “The Ballad of Frankie Lee and Judas Priest” is the only relatively lengthy, Dylan-esque ballad. Another remarkable characteristic of this album in particular, is the use of society’s “rejects” as a central figure in the subsequent tracks “Drifter’s Escape,” “Dear Landlord” and “I Am a Lonesome Hobo.” The album also includes his original version of “All Along the Watchtower” – the sole reason I bought this album in the first place. The reasons to purchase John Wesley Harding go way beyond that point, however. Constituted from a dark and simple place – this record is Bob Dylan sans his rambling riff raff, allowing you to truly hear why he is regarded so highly.

19. Supertramp - Breakfast in America

Supertramp, a band with one great albums and a few other, eh not so great ones. But when it was great, it was really really great – case in point, Breakfast in America. Both of my parents managed to contribute a copy of this 1979 record, which is exceptionally remarkable given that they followed two vastly different musical paths in their time. It’s easy to understand why they both loved this album, however, with tracks like “Goodbye Stranger,” “Take the Long Way Home” and obviously, “Breakfast in America.” Even if you have no idea who Supertramp is, I can guarantee you’ve at least heard “The Logical Song” once in your life. A seemingly random choice to be included on this list, give it a chance and you’ll understand why I have deemed it a necessity.

20. Simon and Garfunkel - Bridge Over Troubled Water

The last album of folk legends, Simon and Garfunkel, Bridge Over Troubled Water is flawless in every sense of the word. What sets Simon and Garfunkel apart from the other musicians of their time is that they don’t just make music, they create art – Bridge Over Troubled Water being their Mona Lisa. “The Boxer” is a triumph, not just for the duo, not just for folk, but for all rock. Other notable tracks are “The Only Living Boy in New York,” “Keep the Customer Satisfied” and obviously, “Bridge Over Troubled Water.” The last on the list but certainly not the least by any means, this album is guaranteed to make you feel some type of way.

Every list is going to be biased depending on what the author’s collection contains. I am going to be honest, my list is completely biased. However, I’m going to impart it on you anyways because I believe I am an expert on the matter.

[gothicangeluk]

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January 2017 New Year’s roundup and gossip

2017 is here at last, and I think I speak for all of us when I say thanks to whatever deity is listening for the fact that 2016 is done. I mean, what a total shitbag of a year, dudes.

First of all, it seems that “dying in 2016” is the new 27 club; even when we got to the final fortnight of the year, the grim reaper didn’t take a sabbatical, making off with Carrie Fisher, Debbie Reynolds and George Michael, among countless others I am sure.

This was of course the year in which we also lost Prince, Alan Rickman and Bowie, and whilst I have no doubt that multiple workplace deadpools paid out like never before this year, the bigger picture is still a bit shitty, no? I actually quite like George Michael, so that surprise Xmas day exit did my head in a bit, on top of having a sudden bout of flu that put me in bed for the main part of both the day itself and Boxing day too.

For those of a slightly off-colour bent who want to get their bets in early for 2017’s celeb hit list, check out the 2017 Deathlist here for inspiration.

Additionally of course we’ve had Brexit, Trump, loads of international terrorist attacks and the virtual annihilation of Aleppo, not to mention the fact that we may be on the brink of either the next cold war or even more terrifyingly, a Trump-Putin love-in, so all told I think it is fair to say that 2017 isn’t opening particularly well either.

But that may just be my naturally gloomy Goth outlook speaking for me. Anyway, now that I’ve thoroughly pissed in everyone’s cornflakes, let’s move on to my more general roundup of my latest happenings and that of some of the other Goth bloggers that I like.

Lady Gothique’s world

I am to be fair pretty dull in my old age these days, and would generally prefer to be at home alone in my pyjamas on the sofa than out dancing the night away. I went to visit my parents for Christmas, and took the makings of a truly nasty lurgie with me-after I fell with the flu on Xmas day itself, my parents joined me in my misery two days later, and so we had a bit of a crappy week all told!

My black cat (Batman Salem Slinkycat) continues to entertain and delight friends and strangers alike-he has developed a new trick, which involves walking up to a total stranger and then with no warning at all, launching himself from floor level up to their chest. This is his way of letting you know he wants a hug-but if the person in question doesn’t spot his approach, the first they know about it is when something black, furry and reasonably large comes flying for their throats.

So far, the two people he has done it to that I know of have instinctively caught him rather than pitching a fit and flinging him into the canal in fear, so I am hoping that his luck holds out.

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