#and now it's just dreams of dating people
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Still The One
Note - just as a little thank you for being so kind I thought I’d post something I’ve written lately. I’ll be back in a few days when my heads on straight but i hope you’re all well 🩷 and I miss you guys and my masey
Pairing - Mason Mount × Reader
Word count - 1.5k
Warnings - fluff
‘Sorry guys’ you heard from behind you. The hand that was being placed on your waist squeezing you ever so softly as their hot breath tickled your neck but you knew that voice instantly and you couldn’t help but smile. ‘Could I borrow my wife please?’
The chorus of awww’s from your little group of friends that you were standing with made you blush but you didn’t care. Melting back into Mason's body behind you as he wrapped his arms further around your waist and kissed your shoulder. His skin was hot from embarrassment as his cheek touched your neck and you thought it was the cutest thing ever.
It was the first time he’d referred to you as his wife to other people. The sound making your skin tingle as you couldn’t contain you giggles and you just felt yourself radiating joy as your friends mirrored your smile.
‘Go on then, y/n. Your husband needs you’ your best friend laughed. Her sending you a wink as he pulled back so you could take his hand and when you turned to face him you felt your heart explode in your chest.
You couldn’t believe he was officially all yours.
This whole day had gone by in a flash, time only stopping when you caught eyes with him as he looked back at you tearily down the aisle and it finally hit you that you were actually doing this. Finally marrying the boy of your dreams and cementing the rest of your lives together.
‘What’s up?’ You asked as you followed him. Trying your best you wade through in your huge dress as Mason did his best not to step on it.
‘It's first dance time, are you ready?’ He asked. Brows wiggling cheekily at you and you were beginning to wonder if he had something up his sleeve.
‘What do you mean? We just sway from side to side right?’
‘Nah, I’ve been working on my moves’ he winked. ‘Just follow my lead yeah?’
‘Oh Mase, I don’t like the sound of that’ you laughed, but there was no time to argue. Mason giving the DJ a wave as he led you to the centre of the dance floor and you noticed people had started to gather in a circle around the perimeter. The nerves suddenly hit you that everyone would be looking at you but one look at Mason's kind face let you know everything would be fine.
‘Ladies and gentlemen, Mr and Mrs Mount’
When it came to picking the song for your first dance, there was only one option you could think of. The pair of you had never really had a song that was yours before and considering how long you’d been together for you figured you should have had one by now. That all changed around six months ago when you and Mason went on a date night with Rasmus and Laura to see Teddy Swims and Mason pulled you in extra close for one specific song.
You’d heard the original so many times, but listening to the boy you loved murmur the lyrics softly into your ear was a moment that etched itself right into your brain and as you looked up him right now you felt those same feelings swarm you.
He was so handsome
His hair was styled just how you liked it, him asking you what your favourite look of his was a few weeks before today so he could have it just like that and your chest fluttered at the gesture. His eyes were warm and happy as they creased at the sides but it was your favourite smile in the whole wide world that your eyes were drawn to. The same one you were met with on your first date that made you fall for him in the first place, the same one you woke up to and went to sleep with every night and the same one that you saw when he told you I do a few hours prior.
You were so so in love with him you thought you might burst.
As the start of the song played, Mason took your hand and kissed the back of it causing the butterflies to surge in your tummy. You were so in awe of him it’s like you were floating and when he pulled you in closer by your waist you wrapped your arms around his neck. Letting him sway you ever so gently as his forehead rested on yours.
Looks like we made it, look how far we've come my baby
We mighta took the long way, we knew we'd get there someday
Tears were springing in your eyes almost instantly, looking up into his eyes as you could tell his were a little watery too. His freckled nose pink as he blushed and you had to hold back from pulling him in for a kiss as everyone was watching and and you weren’t sure if you could pull yourself away.
They said, "I bet they'll never make it"
But just look at us holding on
We're still together, still going strong
‘I can’t believe we finally did it’ he laughed quietly, trying to pull you in a bit closer but the puffy skirt of your dress made it difficult.
‘Sorry, this dress is bloody massive’ you laughed. ‘I’ll take it off soon’
‘Oh yeah’ he winked and you laughed at the way he couldn’t keep things serious ever.
‘Cheeky, I meant I’ll change into my evening dress’
You're still the one I run to
The one that I belong to
You're still the one I want for life
‘Have you had a good day, Mrs Mount?’ He asked, not getting tired of hearing that name come out of his mouth and his smile mirror yours as you grinned up at him happily.
‘The best day’ you beamed. ‘I love you so much’
‘I love you too’ he whispered. Placing his forehead back on yours and shutting his eyes so he could feel the lyrics whilst you looked up at his perfect face.
You're still the one that I love
The only one I dream of
You're still the one I kiss goodnight
Even though today was all about the pair of you, you’d missed him. Since the ceremony you’d been pulled apart to try and speak to everyone that had joined you for your special day but you wanted to be around him more than anything. So you took this opportunity with both hands and held him close. Letting him whisper the words in your ear just had he had that night as he slowly moved you around the dance floor and forgot everyone else that was there. Feeling so full of love as you inhaled his scent and revelled in the feel of him. Knowing you just needed to get through the rest of your day and it would be just the two of you again.
‘You trust me right?’ He whispered. His voice teasing and you didn’t know why he was asking you that and when you pulled back to look at him his eyes were sparkling with joy.
‘I just married you, I can hardly say no can I?
‘Right answer’ he laughed, pulling away so he could spin you out to the side of him and you giggled as he pulled you back in so your neck was against his arm and he could dip you back. The whole room cheering as he lent down to kiss you but you couldn’t kiss him back properly as you were laughing so it was just a mess of lips and teeth.
As soon as he pulled you back up and into his arms properly again you grabbed his face and kissed him. Not happy with the fact you hadn’t kissed him the right way just now and even though everyone was being loud you blocked out the noise and focused on your man as he lifted you up by your waist and spun you around a few times.
‘Are these those moves you’ve been practising?’ You giggled as he settled you back down. Going back to swaying you gently as the song was coming to an end but you wished it would have gone on forever. Knowing as soon as it was over you’d be torn away from him again until later on when you went to bed.
‘Nah, I’ve got a few more to show you later’ he winked. Your face turning bright red at the cheeky remark and even though he was joking, in the back of your mind you were hoping there was a lick of truth to it. The pair of you smiling back at each other delight, feeling completely euphoric at the fact you were stood in the middle of a dance floor in the arms of the one you loved more than anything with the rest of your lives to navigate together.
You’d made it. Made your way through the awkward talking stage, to your first date and then to your first kiss and everything that comes after. Through laughter and tears, fights and apologies and everything in between. You’d done it together and you knew you’d never be alone again.
I'm so glad we made it
Look how far we've come, my baby
#Mason Mount#Mason Mount blurb#mason mount fanfic#mason mount one shot#mason mount imagine#mason mount fan fic#mason mount fluff#mason mount angst#Mason Mount smut#mason mount imagines#mason mount fan fiction#mason mount fic#mason mount x reader#mason mount x y/n#footballer x reader#footballer x y/n#footballer imagines#footballer imagine#footballer fan fiction
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“26” | CL16 ᡣ𐭩.ᐟ
Parings: charles leclerc x ex!singer!reader
Summary: the world didn’t know you and Charles broke up a few months ago. it was until you haven’t been to any gp people started speculating. he finds some one new. Makes his dream com true. And you write an album about him reveling how you broke up and why.
“If it doesn’t go away by the time I’m 30 then I made a mistake and I’ll tell you I’m sorry”
Now playing: “21” by Gracie Abrams.
warnings: smau and angst. that’s it tbh :)
author’s note: idk if this makes sense but I hope it does lol. Don’t forget to like, comment or reblog! And follow me so we can be friends :3 (and drink mate together!)
MASTERLIST
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yourusername made a post
liked by yourbff, taylorswift, shawnmendes, and 1,345,789 others
yourusername: guess it’s just me, myself and music 🐰 (new tunes coming soon)
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user89: queeennnn can’t wait!!!
charlesmylove: why isn’t charles liking y/n stuff anymore 😭
↳ user976: RIGHT that’s what I’ve noticed
↳ user435: girl don’t start being delusional prob Charles doesn’t use social media
↳ user21: I have the feeling they broke up
sabrinacarpenter: they are not ready for what’s coming 🤓
↳ yourusername: 🤫
shawnmendes: gonna be album of the year
lilyhme: prettiest girl in town now can be mine 💍
↳ yourusername: yours forever my love 💍
↳ charlesstan: WHAT DO YOU MEAN NOW WHAT
↳ user0923: guess she knows things we don’t
↳ y/nxtaylor: spill the tea sis 😭
↳ alexalbon: why you always wanna date your friends???
↳ lilymhe: they’re pretty
↳ alexalbon: and I’m not??? I AM YOUR BOYFRIEND
↳ georgerussel: love watching drama 🍿
↳ y/nstan: WHAT DO YOU KNOW?!
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#charles and #y/n are trending on twitter
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f1gossipofficial made a post
liked by user57, user1, y/nstan, charlesiloveu and others.
f1gossipofficial: rumors has it that our fave couple on the grid isn’t couple anymore! 💔 Ferrari driver Charles Leclerc was seen out and about with a mistery girl. The source confirmed it wasn’t y/n. Y/n was seen arriving to New York last Monday. The fan that met her told us she said in a conversation she’s been living there since last year! Guess they broken up late last year and kept it a secret! What do we thing about all of this????
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user34: WHAT THIS IS THE WORST DAY OF MY LIFE THEY LOOKED LIKE END GAME 😭😭😭
charlesstan: I’m dead
user975: tbh I didn’t like her for him
y/nstan: I liked Charles sm this is so sad
user0863: now I need y/n new music I NEED TO KNOW
user87: new music coming >>>> new break up song about Charles 😭
usrr12: who is that mistery girl? We need a further investigation
↳ f1gossipofficial: on it baby 🕵️
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yourusername uploaded a story
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charlesleclerc uploaded a story
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charlesleclerc made a post
liked by user572, yourusername, carlossainz55 and others.
charlesleclerc: WE FINALLY MADE IT! I won my home gp for the first time, wow! Thank you everyone, ferrari, the fans. Everyone. This was my dream and I can’t believe this is actually reality. So thrilled! This is for you dad, wish you were here to see it. Let’s celebrate and then focus on the next race! 💪🏻
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user86: he is so proud of you I promise 😭😭😭
charstan: congrats prince!! ✨
y/nstan: why is my woman on the likes ????
↳ user32: THATS WHAT I THOUGHT FIRST INTERACTION IN QLMOST A YEAR
carlossainz55: congrats hermano !!!!
landonorris: what a race mate!
lewishamilton: finally!! 👑
user678: so happy for you charlieeeee
arthurleclerc: ❤️❤️❤️
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you text your producer and best friend
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yourusername made a post
liked by user679, yourbff, sabrinacarpenter, charlesleclerc and 1,432,568 others
yourusername: here to finally tell you that my first single “26” for my next album is out!!! Made this album from the deep end of my heart. Hope you like it as much as I love it (and help me get through). link in bio 🧸
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yourbff: the most beautiful and saddest song I’ve ever heard 😭
lilymhe: GIRL I’m sobbing wtf
user256: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
User998: she really said let’s spill the tea
↳ user895: but i never thought it would be LIKE THIS 😭
landonorris: congrats @/yourusername !! On repeat for the rest of the month at least
↳ georgerussel: babygirl
georgerussel: thanks for the tea y/n! Beautiful song from a beautiful soul ❤️ we miss you
↳ yourusername: I miss you too 💔
↳ carlossainz55: wish you could come back some time again :(
shawnmendes: I cried I sobbed I screamed I died
sabrinacarpenter: the best artist of all time iloveu bestie ❤️🩹
User673: CHARLES LIKED 😭😭😭😭
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── .✦ FIN
Hope you liked it guys 💌 if you have any ideas my inbox is open so send your requests!
#charles leclerc#charles leclerc angst#charles leclerc x y/n#charles leclerc x female reader#charles leclerc x you#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc smau#cl16 x you#cl16 imagine#cl16 x reader#cl16#cl16 one shot#cl16 x y/n#cl16 fic#cl16 fanfic#f1 x reader#f1 fic#f1 x female reader#f1 x you#f1 imagine#f1 fanfic#Spotify
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a Nico fic where he is dating a famous model and the devils win the Stanley cup and they all go out to party and they are at the club drinking and they stay out till 5am and she gets really drunk and Nico is also drunk but not as drunk as her and when they are walking out of the club together there is some paprizie and Nico I helping her walk and has a arm around her waist and is helping her to the car and her hair is all frizzy and her face is flushes red and when they get home he is helping her get ready for bed
Oooo I love this thank you so much for the request
Celebrating Victory, Together | Nico hischier
Nico hischier x reader
Masterlist
The city was alive with celebration. The streets of New Jersey were filled with the hum of excitement, honking horns, and the sounds of people cheering. The Devils had just won the Stanley Cup, and for Nico Hischier, it was a dream come true. The young captain had led his team to the ultimate victory, but that night, the true celebration wasn’t just about hockey—it was about love, passion, and the promise of a new chapter.
Nico’s girlfriend, Y/N, was everything he had ever dreamed of. A world-renowned model, her beauty was unmatched, but it was her heart, her spirit, and her undying support that had captivated him from the start. She’d been there for him through thick and thin, standing by his side even when the road got tough. And now, after the biggest victory of his career, she was here to celebrate with him, her laughter mixing with the cheers of the crowd as they poured out of the arena and into the night.
The victory party was one of the most anticipated events of the year, and it didn’t disappoint. The venue was packed with players, coaches, staff, and even some celebrities. Champagne flowed freely, and the music was a blur of beats and bass that kept the energy electric. Nico and Y/N arrived together, her arm wrapped around his as they made their way through the sea of people.
Her outfit was breathtaking. A sleek black dress that clung to her curves, sparkling with a subtle shimmer under the club lights. Her long hair, usually so perfectly styled, was slightly undone from the excitement, waves of it cascading around her shoulders. Nico couldn’t help but smile when he saw her, his heart swelling with pride. She was his, and tonight was going to be unforgettable.
They were showered with congratulations from friends and teammates as they settled into the party. Nico’s teammates, his brothers, slapped him on the back, holding their beers high in the air, celebrating their shared success. Y/N, ever the social butterfly, made her way through the crowd, laughing and chatting with everyone, but her eyes always returning to Nico, her rock.
As the night wore on, the drinks flowed a little more freely. The energy in the club grew louder, more chaotic. Nico, although a little buzzed, remained focused. He didn’t want to get too drunk—not when he had her by his side, not when tonight was meant to be special. He kept an eye on Y/N, who, after a couple of rounds of cocktails, was starting to let loose more than he’d expected. Her laughter echoed through the space, her face flushed from the alcohol, her cheeks pink like she’d been kissed by the warmth of the evening sun.
“You okay?” Nico asked, leaning in close as he wrapped an arm around her waist.
“I’m fine!” Y/N giggled, brushing a strand of hair out of her face. “Just celebrating with my favorite hockey player.” She playfully poked his chest, and Nico couldn’t help but smile. There was nothing like seeing her so carefree, but he knew her limits.
A few more rounds of shots later, and Y/N was definitely more than tipsy. Her steps were a little wobbly, and she had to lean into Nico more than usual to stay upright. The club had become a whirlwind of bodies and flashing lights, and she seemed to be caught in the middle of it all.
“You sure you’re good?” Nico asked, his voice a mix of concern and affection. Her face was now flushed red, and her hair—usually so sleek—had started to frizz out of control, waves falling over her face.
“I’m perfect,” she slurred, a goofy grin spreading across her face. “I’m just... so happy, baby. You won!”
“I did,” Nico said, giving her a soft kiss on the cheek. “And I’m glad you’re here to celebrate with me.”
“Of course, I wouldn’t miss it,” she said, her voice full of warmth.
But Nico could see she was starting to get more unsteady on her feet. He helped guide her through the crowd toward the exit, his arm securely around her waist as she leaned into him for support. Her heels clicked against the floor as they made their way outside, and the cool night air hit their faces. Nico’s breath was warm as he pulled her closer, helping her stay upright as she swayed.
“Okay, let’s get you to the car,” Nico said, his tone protective. He glanced around at the cars waiting nearby, his hand steady on her waist as they made their way through the parking lot.
Y/N’s hair was a mess, strands sticking out in all directions, but she didn’t seem to care. Her flushed face was an adorable mixture of embarrassment and happiness. She giggled every time she looked at him, her eyes glazed but still bright with affection.
“You’re so strong,” she whispered, looking up at Nico through half-lidded eyes. “I feel like I’m gonna fall over...”
“Don’t worry,” Nico replied softly. “I’ve got you.”
They reached the car, and Nico helped her into the passenger seat, closing the door behind her before walking around to the driver’s side. He could feel the weight of the night’s excitement settling on him as he slid into the driver’s seat, his hands slightly unsteady on the wheel, but not nearly as much as Y/N’s. The drive home was quiet, the only sound being the soft hum of the engine as Nico kept glancing over at her. She had her eyes closed, resting her head against the window, her lips curved into a content smile.
Once they got home, Nico helped Y/N out of the car, his arm around her waist again as they made their way up to the door of their apartment. She stumbled a little, but Nico’s grip was firm, guiding her every step of the way. He unlocked the door with a quiet click and led her inside.
“Okay, we’re almost there,” he said gently as he guided her toward the bathroom.
“I can’t believe we won...” Y/N murmured, her voice full of exhaustion and happiness. “You’re a champion, Nico. My champion.”
Nico chuckled softly, helping her sit on the edge of the bathtub. “Let’s get you ready for bed, okay?”
With the patience he’d learned over the years, Nico helped Y/N out of her dress, carefully unzipping the back and slipping it off her shoulders. Her skin was warm, her movements sluggish as she tried to help, but Nico made sure to take his time, making sure she was comfortable. He couldn’t help but smile as he noticed her frizzy hair, the way it seemed to have a mind of its own now, and how her face was flushed with a mix of alcohol and excitement.
Once she was in her pajamas, Nico guided her to the bed, where she collapsed with a soft laugh, her eyes fluttering shut. “I love you, Nico,” she whispered, her voice thick with emotion.
“I love you too,” Nico replied, brushing a stray lock of hair from her face. “Get some rest. Tomorrow’s another day.”
He kissed her forehead gently, tucking the blanket around her, and stayed by her side, his hand resting on her waist as she drifted into a peaceful sleep.
The night had been one for the books—a night of celebration, love, and memories. As Nico lay beside her, he thought back on everything that had brought him to this point. The Stanley Cup was a great achievement, but the true victory, the one that mattered most, was right there beside him.
#hockey#nhl#nhl x reader#fanfic#nico hischier x reader#nico hischier fic#nico hischier fluff#nico hischer x reader#nico hischier imagines#nico hischier#new jersey devils x reader#nhl13#new jersey devils#nhl x y/n#nhl x oc#nhl x you
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Here's my piece for the @mcspirkevents Big Bang! I was paired with the excellent @twinkboimler and their fic Jim Kirk's Guide to Delivering the Goods, which you can find here (E, AOS McSpirk, 60k)
Summer just started, and Jim is bored out of his mind. The courses he needs to take aren’t being offered until the second half of the summer, so he has an entire month to bother his roommate Bones. At Bones’ suggestion to get a job, Jim fixes up a motorbike and starts making deliveries to people in town, including a cute Vulcan professor named Spock. But when Jim is beaten up while making a delivery, it’s Spock who delivers Jim back to the apartment he shares with Bones. After the meet-cute from hell, Spock and Bones start dating… and so do Jim and Spock. With neither roommate aware they’re both dating the same man, there’s only so long that things can go well for them before the other shoe finally drops.
Also as part of my Big Bang offerings, I made a fic playlist (below) — partly a love letter to McSpirk, partly a love letter to myself and Fletcher's overlapping music taste.
Thank you again to Fletcher @twinkboimler for working on this project with me, it's been an absolute joy!
Until the Birds Return on Spotify
Tracks and choice lyrics below the cut (contains vague spoilers):
Astronaut | Future Crib
I wanna be an astronaut Fly into space I wanna see Mars from Venus I wanna go to that place And if you come with me They'll be room in my ship I'll take you up there with me It can be just you and me
Afraid of Heights | boygenius
I never rode a motorcycle I never smoked a cigarette I wanna live a vibrant life But I wanna die a boring death
Day by Day | Old Sea Brigade
Time and time again, I think I'm falling through space And I wake up in my bed just sweating in sheets
... Then I think of you growing old and it breaks my heart
Factories | Autoheart
When you found my body by the lake You wasn't sure if I was still alive
You and Your Friend | Snake River Conspiracy
Must we go run through our lives with our eyes closed To the loving happiness that we can share I think I'm in love with you and your friend
My Gal, My Guy | Darlingside
My (guy) he's the bluest ocean, (he) Waits under the bluest sky for me I belong to (him) When I'm in the water
Santa Fe | Autoheart
Heaven sent You were like a present I should not have kept A sticker on your forehead saying 'breakable And I broke you bad
Coat on a Hook | The National
Two days, we're still not talking You're the opposite of an open book Come back for me
Top to Toe | Fenne Lily
So I'm changing all my days To make your nights It's just not right
Pigeon Song | Patrick Wolf
Now the pigeons gather 'round my feeding hand And we talk 'til the evening fades I have learnt how it goes What you wait for never shows And what you least wanted, holds you down like a stone
Hornets | The National
But I don't wanna leave And I don't wanna hide I just don't wanna run Into you tonight
Tea, Milk & Honey | Oh Pep!
If you stick with me, I'll make sure your time is all right If you don't understand where I am now, it's better if we leave it
The Spiritual | Jukebox the Ghost
We might have kissed a bit too soon I could feel what was coming and I didn't mean to hurry you I just knew that time would find our fingers linked, through and through Forgive me, I'm human too
Bike Dream | Rostam
Two boys, one to kiss your neck And one to bring you breakfast Get you out of bed
Don't Go | Yazoo
Can't stop now Don't you know I ain't never gonna let you go
Jenny | The Mountain Goats
I hopped on back of the bike, wrapped my arms around you I sank my face into your hair And then I inhaled as deeply as I possibly could You were sweet and delicious as the warm desert air And you pointed your headlamp toward the horizon We were the one thing in the galaxy God didn't have his eyes on 900 cc's of raw whining power, no outstanding warrants for my arrest
Old Old Fashioned | Josh Ritter (Frightened Rabbit cover)
Oh let's get old fashioned Back to how things used to be If I get old, old fashioned Would you get old, old fashioned with me?
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lovely people person i'd like to know better <3
thank you for tagging me, darling @constantlylivinginanotherworld
࣪ ִֶָ☾. A song you currently have on repeat right now?
i have a lot of songs on repeat, so i'll list three! need you now by Lady A, bewitched by laufey, and first/love late spring by mitski
࣪ ִֶָ☾. Top hyper fixations recently?
mm, i don't think i have any, at the moment. maybe arcane, video games, browsing onlineee for clothes and lingerie, and drawingg
࣪ ִֶָ☾. Favourite aesthetics/colours right now?
mm, i like most colors, so that changes a lot. but black will always be my favorite. as for aesthetics, i kinda do like dark academic at the moment!
࣪ ִֶָ☾. An album you will never get tired of and has no skips?
bewitched: the goddess edition by laufey, i just love all of the songs <3
࣪ ִֶָ☾. Dream date with your celebrity crush?
oh mm, i'd love to go out for tea, bake together, cuddle, have deep conversations (or rambling session), and go out for a night drive, singing along to music and look at the stars with elizabeth olsen, aubrey plaza, or billie eilishh! just a simple casual date! oh and games, whether it's cards, board games, or video games!
࣪ ִֶָ☾. A YouTube video you will forever watch?
mm, i don't have a specific video in mind, but i'll watch any videos by coryxkenshin! his videos never failed to cheer me up! i miss that guyy
࣪ ִֶָ☾. Something you're looking forward to?
i have a few things i'm looking forward to. two of them being the winter break and travelingg
tagging: i don't really interact with anyone on here muchh. so i'll tag this pretty sweetheart, @artistlez. no pressureee, and i hope you're doing well, darling! <3
10 people I’d like to get to know better!
(the OG post was so long omg)
thank you @marrykisskilled for tagging me!
+ A song you currently have on repeat right now? everything i wanted by billie eilish
+ Your top hyper fixations currently? nick sturniolo clearly
+ Favorite aesthetics/colors right now? love fall aesthetics, but pastel colors are my favorite
+ An album you will never get tired of and has NO skips? 5SOS5 by 5SOS, WWAFAWDWG by billie eilish, and Eternal Sunshine by ariana grande
+ Dream date with your celeb crush? a calm little night in with Luke Hemmings where we just talk and snack and he plays guitar for me, until things get heated 😉….when i ask him why they never released the making of 5SOS5 part two 🤨
+ A YouTube video you will forever watch? 5SOS’ cocktail chats will have a hold on me for the rest of my life
+ Something you're looking forward to? Thanksgiving, i love eating and seeing (most of) my family lmao
🏷️: @freshloveee @tyummyz @sturniioloslut @nickssidewitch @nicksbestie @maliaforstvrns @chrissv4mp @delilahsturniolo @riowritesitall @chrislilcumslvt @leoslaboratory
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40k Sfw Alphabet - Sanguinius
Thanks for all the love my first one of these has been getting! It's now, like, my second most liked/reblogged post. So, again, thank you guys so much!!
By popular demand, my next primary is the glorious hawk boy himself, Sanguinius.
Please enjoy (and watch out for errors cause this is unedited)
A - Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)
Sanguinius is VERY affectionate, both physically and verbally. In public, in private, doesn't matter. Wherever you two are, he's whispering sweet nothings in your ear or ensuring he's got a hand on you. Part of it is to be a tease, but most of it is for his own comfort. He always wants to know you're close. Always wants you to know how important you are to him. If he's in particular need of this reassurance, he might drape a wing over your shoulder or around your waist, just for that extra bit of physical touch.
B - Best friend (What are they like as a friend? How would the friendship start?)
Aside from Vulkan, Sangy is about the easiest person to be friends with. He's charismatic, he's well-adjusted and he's genuinely a really sweet dude. But to be best friends with him, that might take more time. See, Sangy is used to people befriending him because of what he is- the Great Angel, the perfect primarch- and not necessarily because of who he is. So, even with friends, he maintains his angelic mask, and he will be resistant to letting it slip. Given enough time, however, I can see him feeling comfortable enough around you that he feels he can be himself, and maybe even share some of the darker things he deals with.
C - Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)
Sanguinius-cuddles are about the only thing that rival Vulkan-cuddles, if not exceeds them. If he could swallow you up with his arms alone, he would. At times, you might have to ask him to let up a little, lest you suffocate from his grip.
Sanguinius absolutely makes use of his wings with cuddles, too. Like a pair of enormous downy blankets, he will encase you in them, humming contentedly as he feels you stir against their feathers.
D - Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)
Sanguinius is definately the type to want to settle down. He wishes a life where he doesn't have to live up to the expectations of the Emperor and mankind as a whole. A life where he can just... live.
And doing so with the person he loves most? That's just about the perfect dream.
E - Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)
If Sangy is breaking up with you, he's letting you down gently. He's explaining how he feels and trying to keep you from blaming yourself. Trying to remain friends would be too painful for him, though, and I believe once you two parted ways, you wouldn't see much of each other again.
Now, if you broke up with him, it's a slightly different story. Others have already head canoned that beneath the surface, Sanguinius has a possessiveness streak, and I believe that a break up he did not want would absolutely trigger that streak. He'd never hurt you, nor intentionally do anything to cause you distress or torment. But you're never leaving his sight, whether you know he's there or not. And Emperor help any man who tries to touch you- consensually or otherwise.
F - Fiancé (How to they feel about commitment? How quickly would they want to get married?)
With his powers of foresight, Sanguinius probably knew you'd be the one he'd marry the moment he laid eyes on you. So, with that in mind, he would want to rush things at all. He knows how this is going to end, so he's going to enjoy every moment of it: from the awkward first dates right up until he buys your ring.
G - Gentle (How gentle are they? Both physically and emotionally?)
Only primarch more gentle in both regards is Vulkan.
H - Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it and what is it like?)
Much the same as cuddling. Super crushing, super loving, and making good use of those big beautiful wings.
I - I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)
It would take a while, I think, purely because before he were to say it, Sanguinius would need to realise that he doesn't have to maintain the facade of perfection when he's with you. I see that taking a long time. But once he does realise this... Oh boy, you're getting the confession and the proposal all in the same say.
J - Jealous (How jealous do they get? What are they like when they're jealous?)
Sanguinius trusts you with every ounce of his soul. He knows you are his and that he is yours, and he knows that he will never have to worry about you betraying him.
However...
As mentioned back in E, I am part of the group that head canons that Sanguinius has a secret, buried possessive streak. He is aware of it, he strives to keep it under control, and nine times out of ten he is successful. But he is not always successful. And when he is not successful, the most common way his possessiveness shows itself is jealousy. Are you being particularly friendly with one of his brothers? He may intervene. One of your male friends embrace you for just a little too long? Sanguinius will be glaring daggers at him, might even bare his fangs. This behaviour is worse when he's feeling particularly insecure, or if the stress and grief of war is getting to him. But as I said before, he's aware of this, and he will communicate with you exactly how he's feeling and what he needs from you in terms of support.
K - Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)
Depending on the mood and what both your desires are, Sanguinius kisses range from gentle and sweet all the way up to intense, getting-your-lip-bitten, can't-breathe-cause-he-won't-let-you-go passion. With Sangy, you get the best of both worlds.
L - Little Ones (How are they around children?)
Only primarch better around children than Sangy is Vulkan. Enough said.
M - Mornings (How are morning spent with them?)
Sleepy, I think. One, because Sanguinius loves nothing more than lying in bed and holding you close to him like a teddy bear; and two, because sleeping while wrapped in his wings is so damn comfy, why would you ever wanna get up?
N - Nights (How are nights spent with them?)
Depending on the mood, ranging from cuddle sessions that lead to you both falling asleep in each other's arms, to make-out seshs that led to said cuddling sessions, all the way up to... well, this isn't the nsfw alphabet, so I'll let you guys... you know...
O - Openess (When will they start revealing things about themselves? Do they reveal things slowly over time or all at once?)
At first, getting Sanguinius to open up is like trying to pry open a steel crate with your bare hands: fucking difficult. He's the Great Angel, after all; perfection doesn't even begin to describe the expectations he has to live up to, let alone those that he holds himself to personally. So getting him to divulge how he really feels or that, under the surface, he's struggling under all that weight? Yeah, I don't see that being easy. However, when Sanguinius DOES finally trust you and he realises he loves you, it'll be like opening the proverbial floodgates. For the first time in his long life, Sanguinius has someone he can admit his flaws to and they will love him all the same: he's going to make use of that and he's going to cherish that. Right up until his last, dying breath.
P - Patience (How easily are they angered?)
Sanguinius has all the patience in the world for you. However, if he's particularly stressed or the Red Thirst is gnawing at his mind, I can see it suddenly becoming very thin. He would deeply regret anything hurtful he ever said in these moments, though, and would go above and beyond to make it up to you.
Q - Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail or do they forget the minor things?)
Every little detail he has committed to memory. How you look, what you like, all the memories you've made together. You can bet your bottom dollar that, when he lay dying at Horus' feet, he was flashing back to every single second he spent with you.
R - Remember (What's their favourite memory of the relationship?)
The moment he realised he could be himself with you, Red Thirst and all. It's the moment he realised why he'd forsee you to be his soul mate- because you love him for him. All of him. Every perfect curve and jagged edge. For both the angel and the beast.
S - Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)
Part one isn't even a question. The mere possibility of you coming to harm is enough to get his Red Thirst raging. And if something actually DID happen to you? Emperor help whoever or whatever was responsible.
Much like all of the primarchs honestly, the kind of protection Sanguinius needs from you is the emotional kind. He needs someone with whom he does not have to maintain the facade of the Great Angel. He needs someone who sees him for what he is: a man. A man with demons that he needs help in fighting. He's not an "I fix can him" type beat like some of his brothers (cough cough, Konrad, cough, cough). More "he can fix himself with your support."
T - Try (How much effort do they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts and everyday tasks?)
U - Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)
He's putting in the whe nine yards: whatever that means for you, Sanguinius is doing it. Even if he's distracted by war, taking care of you is his number one priority.
Aforementioned possessiveness. Another could be emotional guardedness, at least in the beginning of your relationship.
V - Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)
Only in terms of wanting to impress you or make you happy. I could also see Sanguinius having a real thing about his wings: constantly preening them, always wanting to ensure his feathers are all nicely aligned and smoothed down. Couldn't tell you why I think this, just feels right to me idk.
W - Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)
Absolutely.
X - Xtra (A random head cannon for them)
In the wake of Sanguinius' death, the Blood Angels see you as his successor. In their eyes, you are their Primarch now, in all ways other than literally. They revere you the way they do their father. They hold your word above any commander or high lord, even on matters that, by rights, you should have no say in. They'd also see you as their matriarch. Their mother. And as such, many of their warriors would confide in you the same way one would with a trusted maternal figure. I can see you becoming an emotional rock for a lot of them- not just collectively, but individually, as well. So much so, I could even see your presence and/or intervention being a kind of soother of The Black Rage. After all, the only thing strong enough to pull a Blood Angel free from the grief of his father's death is the love of his mother.
As mentioned above, Sanguinius' death was a loss so devastating to the Blood Angels' collective psyche that it spawned a literal curse of madness within the legion. So you can bet everything that the Blood Angels aren't letting you out of their sight. If you thought the Salamanders were protective... you ain't seen nothing yet.
You go nowhere without an entire Astartes squad by your side; as well as snipers lining your route/location and an entire strike cruiser in orbit over the planet you're currently on. They'd probably give you your own set of armour, too, designed by the Blood Angels' own artists before being crafted by their own weaponsmiths.
Y - Yuck (What are some things they wouldn't like in a partner, or in general?)
In general, a lack of empathy and arrogance. I could also see him really not liking someone who does not or cannot recognise their own flaws and shortcomings, what with how massive of a focus self-improvement and self-awareness is to the culture he fosters within the Blood Angels.
Z - Zzz (What are some sleeping habits of theirs?)
You're getting wrapped in the wings. Even if it's sweltering hot outside, Sanguinius is cuddling you right up under his wings like a mama bird with her chick. He'll stop if you ask, of course, but you WILL have to ask.
Tags: @solspina @beckyninja
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Soft Spot for u
- When you started college, one of the student associations assigned you a senior mentor. Back then, you never thought you'd still be friends with him as you enter your final year, while he’s already long graduated. Even less that he’d be the guy of your dreams—the one who makes your heart race. -
Words : 2.6K
You’ve never been much of a party girl. Well, not in the “nightlife scene” kind of way. But a night owl ? That’s totally you. Staying up late doing all the things the daytime doesn’t allow ? That’s your jam. Especially when you’re spending those nights with him.
Since your freshman year, Yuta has been your go-to for late-night hangs: studying, laughing, bickering, drinking, and dancing. You quickly adapted to his vibe - even though, unlike you, he thrives in the nightlife. He loves hopping from on-campus parties to the city’s best clubs. For Yuta, you’d adjust to anything. Normally, you’re not big on people or physical contact, but with him, it’s different.
The first time he asked you to join him at a party, you tagged along, thinking, Why not? At least I’ll have a story to tell. You didn’t like dancing in public—the stares, the unwanted touches—but his touch? That was different. Before long, you were showing up to every party he invited you to, becoming a campus party regular.
Little did they know, you hated parties. You only went for him. For those moments on the dancefloor when his hands rested protectively on your hips, silently warning other guys to back off. It drove you crazy that it felt more big brotherly than anything else. But when you danced together, something shifted. He wasn’t being protective—just… present.
You’ve always wanted to make a move, but the fear of losing him held you back. If he hadn’t made the first move, it probably meant your feelings weren’t mutual. Right? But honestly, just being by his side was better than being with anyone else.
Yuta changed you—not just in how you see relationships, but in how you see life. He was more than a mentor for academics; he pulled you out of your comfort zone and into a brighter, more open world.
Waiting for him to pick you up tonight, you’re lost in thought, touching up your makeup as Keshi’s Soft Spot plays in the background. Your phone buzzes.
Yuta: Be there in 2 mins, love.
You grin, his name lighting up your screen. Gosh, this man owns my heart.
When you hop on his bike, he whistles, eyes raking over your silver sequin dress.
“You planning to set the campus on fire tonight? I don’t remember telling you to outshine me, little miss.”
“No one’s hotter than you, Yuta.” You flirt back, the way you always do when he compliments you. It gives you butterflies every time.
He smirks, giving you a playful smack on the thigh. “Flattery’ll get you far, baby. Keep it up.”
At the party, Yuta, as usual, commands attention. Walking in with him feels like entering as a rockstar’s date—his magnetic aura turning every head. You join his friends—Johnny, Taeyong, Doyoung—who’ve already lined up shots.
Johnny hands you a suspiciously colorful concoction. You sniff it. “Johnny, is this safe? Because I really don’t want to start the semester in the ER.”
Everyone laughs, and Taeyong teases, “Sometimes I forget you’re still in school. Those were the days…”
Shots clink, faces grimace, and the party kicks off. But soon, the buzz, the chaos, and the alcohol start working their magic on your senses. All you want is to dance—with him.
The noise, the games, the music, the chaos of people chatting and singing along, all the stuff happening around you, mixed with the alcohol buzzing in your veins, has your senses on high alert. And now, you only want one thing—to dance with him. You’ve shared him with the crowd long enough, and now it’s your turn. Just you and him, in your world, even if it’s just for a bit.
You leave Jungwoo and Kai behind, still going at that ridiculous card game where every rule somehow ends in "take a sip." It’s funny as hell, you can admit that, but nah—right now, you need him. It’s all you can think about.
You find him at the bar, mid-conversation. You head toward him, sitting by the counter, your mind racing with one single thought: you wanna throw your arms around his neck and kiss him like it’s the only thing keeping you alive. His legs are spread like he’s waiting just for you, a couple of messy strands of hair falling into his eyes, and his half-unbuttoned shirt teasing you with a glimpse of that stunning belly piercing and a peek at his tattoo.
You stop in front of him, hesitating for a second. He’s still chatting with Taeyong but doesn’t miss a beat, sliding an arm around your waist like, yeah, I know you’re here. That little gesture? making you go crazy, and without a second thought, grab his wrist and pull him to the dancefloor. Pressed against him, your bodies move in sync, his hands on your hips, his breath on your neck. Butterflies? More like fireworks.
He’s totally getting with your vibe, moving with you like he’s reading your mind. When you turn around, you catch that huge smile lighting up his face—and wow, it’s the kind of smile that hits you right in the gut. He’s loving this moment, and it’s setting off a full-on butterfly storm in your stomach.
You kinda wish his smile wasn’t this attractive, this unfairly cute, this stupidly sexy. Because all you can think about is kissing him senseless. Like, right now.
You keep getting closer, grinding up against him more, and for some reason tonight, you’re feeling extra bold. You slide your fingers into his, guiding his hand to trace your curves in a way that’s definitely more suggestive than usual. Yuta doesn’t just go along with it—he’s into it. His response is all green lights, like his body is totally in tune with yours, wanting this as much as you do.
You feel his breath on your neck as you press your back against his chest, and yeah, it’s short. Is he... out of breath because of you? The thought sends a shiver down your spine, and without even thinking, you push your hips back against him, swaying like it’s second nature.
And then you feel it—him. Hard. For you.
That’s the last green light you need. You turn, locking eyes, fingers tangling in his hair as you kiss him, pouring years of longing into it. He kisses back—hungry, desperate.
Next thing you know, you’re in a dimly lit laundry room, pinned against the door as his lips crash back onto yours. His hands are everywhere, his voice dripping with desire.
He kisses you again, and this time it’s pure, raw desire. Like, where the hell has he been hiding all this? Not that it matters—you’re practically melting in his hands. Your skin’s on fire, and it feels like your blood is boiling. He’s gonna make you explode, like you’re some freaking nuclear reactor on the verge of meltdown.
The only way you can even begin to handle this insane craving is by biting his bottom lip, cutting the kiss short. He pulls back just enough to look at you, and there’s this spark in his eyes that makes your breath hitch.
“I didn’t know you had this bad girl side,” he says, smirking. “You’ve always been my sweet, innocent Y/n.”
“Not that innocent I guess, if only you knew about my dirty secret.”
“Hmm tell me more baby” you smile hearing the petname he gave you, you love it soo much.
“I touch myself so many times, soaking my panties, just thinking ‘bout you”
He groan “You didn’t.”
“I can’t even count how many times since I know you, you’re my favorite fantasm.” You say a lil bit shyly.
He looks into your eyes, a proud smile on his face. “Then allow me to make the fantasy come true.” He takes hold of your dress, so small that it doesn't take much effort for him to expose your already soaked thong. He slides two fingers over your pussy to caress you through the fabric.
“You’ve been holding out on me, huh?” he growls, fingers brushing against the lace of your underwear.
“Only for you, daddy,” you whisper, testing the nickname that’s been on your mind for way too long.
He freezes, then smirks. “Gosh, you’re gonna drive me insane.”
You've never been so willing in your life. You only dream of one thing: his tongue on you and IN you. He lifts your leg and places it on his shoulder to get better access. You feel his breath on your inner thigh and you moan at the sensation alone.
“Oh god.” He look at you, from the bottom and smirk “You can call me Yuta.” And with those words he wraps your whole soaking pussy in his mouth. First he eats you through the fabric of your thong. Then, using his fingers, he shifts it to the side. He flicks his tongue up and down your folds and then concentrates on your clitoris, sucking gently. The stimulation sends you into heaven, you feel as if you've left this earth. And then he starts playing at your entrance with one of his fingers, looking at you “Want me to get inside baby girl?”
“Yes, please, yes !”
“Your wish is my command.”
He takes hold of your clit again, nibbling lightly, then gently and deliciously slides a finger into your pussy, soon adding a second, which you welcome as a blessing. You try to be as quiet as possible, but your little cries and sobs excite Yuta even more. He picks up the pace and eats you up like he's starving, tasting you like you’re his last meal, you’re trembling. Soon you feel your orgasm coming on and you press down on Yuta's shoulder as if to let him know you're about to burst. He smiles, "Let it go baby, I'm here for you.” You feel the most powerful orgasm you've ever had in your life rushing through you. And this time you can't help yourself, you moan his name out loud and pray that no one else walks by at the same time. He stands up and sucks on each of his two fingers in front of you. Then he slides his tongue back into your mouth.
“I think you can still feel yourself on my tongue, so much that I've sucked you in.” You wrap your arms around his neck, wanting more, but Yuta slows the pace. “Maybe we should slip away before we're noticed.
You slip out quietly, not even bothering to say goodbye to anyone. On the way back, you’re still all sensitive from the way he completely wrecked you earlier. When Yuta pulls up in front of your dorm, he looks a little more hesitant than before. Still, you invite him to come up with you for a bit.
As you close the door to your apartment, you see him sitting on the couch, his hands covering his face like he’s deep in thought. But you don’t stop to overthink it—he’s already given you too much tonight for you to back down now. You climb onto his lap and kiss him, slow and intense. He kisses you back but suddenly pulls away.
“Wait,” he says, looking at you seriously. “I need to understand what’s happening here. Like, what are we doing right now?”
You stare at him, confused. “Do you want a diagram or something?”
“No, I mean, seriously. Isn’t this, like, a bad idea? I’m older than you, and you’re totally wasted. I am too, actually.”
“So what?”
“So yeah, I don’t think this is a good idea. You’ll probably regret it tomorrow. I don’t want to mess things up between us. You mean a lot to me and—”
You cut him off with a dramatic wave, making it clear he needs to stop talking immediately. “This is unreal. Stop seeing me as the clueless first-year kid who doesn’t know anything and needs a protector. Yuta, I don’t want a protector—I want you.”
He just stares at you, speechless.
“I got a soft spot for you, from the very beginning,” you continue, your voice shaking with the weight of the truth. “And honestly, I’ve been hoping every single day since we met that one day you’d wake up and feel the same. But you’ve always had this big brother vibe, and God, it’s been killing me, because I love your attention, I love how affectionate you are, and how you’re always there for me. But Yuta, I want so much more than that. I never said anything because I didn’t want to scare you off or ruin what we have. But seriously, I’ve been into you since day one. So please, stop being my bro—be my lover. Tonight, I felt like it was now or never. There was this moment, this chance, and hell, it’s my last year. I want to leave this university finally dating the guy I’ve been crushing on since freshman year. So if you’re not into it, just say it, but please stop looking at me like I’m some little kid and start seeing the woman I could be by your side.”
Yuta’s lips crash onto yours, giving you the single greatest kiss of your life.
“So you’ve been this into me for all this time, and you never said a word?” he teases, a grin spreading across his face.
“Yuta, please. I’m not exactly the most social person, but I’ve spent practically all my time with you. I hate parties, yet I’ve been at them every week since I met you. I HATE octopus, but I learned how to make Takoyaki like a pro. I think Naruto is the most boring anime ever, but I binged every damn season. Why do you think I did all that? For who?” you shoot back, exasperated.
“Uh… sorry?” he mutters sheepishly.
“Don’t apologize. Honestly, I love most of those things now because they remind me of you, or they’re just so you. I don’t force myself. If it means spending time with you, it’s always worth it in the end.”
He smiles at you, soft and affectionate.
“I’ll admit, I’ve thought about this a lot over the years too,” he says quietly. “But the age gap always felt like too much. And I had this mentor role, you know? I didn’t want to look like some creepy older guy. More than that, I didn’t want to lose you or ruin what we have.”
Your heart pounds at his words. So he doesn’t see you as some desperate little kid, and, more importantly, the guy of your dreams feels the same way about you.
“Can you say it out loud, though? Just once?” you tease him.
“I got a soft spot for you, Y/n.”
“No, no, no, you can do better than that.”
He chuckles, running his tongue along his cheek, clearly amused but knowing you’re not letting this go.
“I got a big crush on you.”
Your smile stretches ear to ear, and you crash your lips against his again. He responds instantly, sliding his tongue against yours, his hands moving to your hips as he pulls you closer. Then, without breaking the kiss, he lifts you effortlessly and carries you to your room, laying you gently on the bed.He trails kisses along your jawline, down to your neck, and a soft moan escapes your lips. He nibbles at your earlobe before whispering, “If you play your cards right tonight, sweetheart, you just might get me to admit I maybe am in love with you by the end of it.”
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Let's pretend it's 1996
Duncan Carmello x F!Reader
Summary: You've always wondered how things would have turned out between you and Duncan if you didn’t break up. It takes 10 years for you to see him again at your High School reunion. This night brings a lot of bittersweet moments between you and him, and you can't help but wonder if after all this time you could make this work again.
CW: fluff, crack, light angst, regrets, memories, exes, high school reunion, drinking, singing, kissing.
Word Count: 3,8k
A/N: This fic is set in 2006, the year the show was released. Duncan never dated Nicole, instead he was with reader. Also, I'm not a lyricist so forgive my cheesy ass song that I wrote for Duncan, but I know this is something he'd write.
— Links: AO3 // Masterlist
After sitting down at the table, you start bobbing your head to the sound of Car Fire, the band playing live, led by none other than Duncan Carmello—your ex. They've taken the stage to kick off the party, while the stragglers keep arriving.
Your friend Pam has left you alone momentarily to procure a couple of drinks. In that time, you've found yourself caught in a web of memories about your Duncan that trace all the way back to high school. It's in this very same gym you're in where you cheered for him from the bleachers when he played basketball. The very same place where you dance together during prom, and you couldn't imagine life with anyone other than him. And now it hosts your 10 Year High School reunion. You promised yourself that you'd never attend any of these cheesy events, but Pam convinced you to come along. She’s in the organization committee, and she was very adamant on you being here tonight.
Pam sets your glass of wine on the table right in front of you, and gets close to your ear to say something over the music playing, “you're staring.”
“What?” you slowly pick up your glass and bring it up to your lips.
“Tell me that you're not still pinning for that asshole.”
“I am not pinning,” you scoff and take another sip to swallow the lie. “I’m remembering. Remembering is not pinning.”
“Tell that to your face.”
You've always wondered how things would have turned out between you and Duncan if you didn’t break up. You were high school sweethearts, the ones that every thought they'd be together forever. But fate had different plans. You wanted to become a journalist, had your mind set on going to college on the other side of the country, and that put a strain on your relationship. Distance was not kind, and a year later there was no more you and Duncan. The last time you saw him was that summer, when you came back and everything went to hell. You haven't seen him in person since. You’ve seen him in pictures that your old classmates have on Facebook, but you never thought of reaching out, despite him being on your mind more often than not.
All the relationships you had after Duncan didn't work out, and it was solely on you. You could never bring yourself to love anyone when he was still a constant presence in your heart and mind. It’s something that you probably never got over, which is kind of pathetic considering he was the one who couldn’t overcome his issues about your long distance relationship. You should hate him, but you never did. You never could. All his concerns were valid, but you were too focused on getting your degree and traveling all over, something you’ve dreamed of since before you met him. And he felt like he wasn’t part of that. He had his life here and wasn’t willing to consider moving away, even if it was just for trying. The pressure was on you to make it work, and it made you feel like a failure for not doing your best to fix the situation. That’s why he was an asshole. He was just a kid, people would say… but so were you. There was too much you had planned for your future to throw away for him. He could've met you halfway, but because he was so damn stubborn that it all ended in a bitter note that left an aftertaste in your throat for years to last. This is mainly the reason you didn't want to come here today. You know it'd be hard to ignore everything you've put in boxes in the farthest corners of your mind. Now, the dust has cleared, lids are open, and you can't bring yourself to close them again.
This evening, he's singing all the songs he wrote in high school, which you remember every lyric to. You're the sole owner of two copies of the one and only album they ever recorded. One of those he gave to you, it came with a special dedication at the back. And a second one you bought to support the band. They're both in an old box labeled ‘Don't open’ that contains everything that you collected from that past relationship and that you've always been unable to get rid of that sits in the back of your closet.
You try to think about all the horrible things he said to you the last time you talked face to face in an attempt to put him out of your mind; but to be honest, it felt like such a surreal conversation you're not sure if it happened or not. You're not the one to hold grudges and yes, he was just a kid, who had just turned 19, and it'll be really petty of you to hold onto that forever.
As the short performance comes to an end, Pam leaves again to set up the next activity at the stage. Music starts playing from a playlist now as you wander around to pick up some appetizers from the buffet table to stuff your face with. Then you meet your colleagues from the school paper that are all gathered at the bar. You have a couple of drinks and a few laughs while catching up with them and everything that's going on with their lives.
Your social battery starts draining as your bladder keeps filling quickly. When you come out of the bathroom, you make a stop in the hallway to study the wall of memories of the class of 96 that holds a lot of moments frozen in pictures that you had forgotten. School events, trips, different clubs, yearbook portraits and personal pics of different groups of friends shine anew as if they were taken yesterday. They're all labeled by year, and the walk down memory lane ends with a graduation picture of the whole class. Your eyes travel back to a collection of snapshots dedicated to prom. There's one of Duncan where he's smiling proudly in his messed up tux after being crowned prom king. Another one of the two of you where he has put his crown on your head to share the win. He later on bought you a tiara, saying you were his only queen. Your heart sinks when you see a more intimate pic of you slowly dancing in his arms. You still remember what song was playing, how he smelled, how his hands caressed the exposed skin at your back. It seems to come alive for a second when you hear his voice behind you…
“I still think you should have been crowned that night.”
“I was a nerd. Haven't you heard? Nerds don't get to be prom royalty,” you say after swallowing the knot in your throat. You don't look back, you can't face him yet. Not this close.
“That's not true. Look at you, you were by far the most beautiful in that gym.”
“Well, it wasn't a beauty contest, either.” You sigh, staring at the most popular girl in school standing on stage with her crown next to Duncan.
“So, you're not going to turn around?”
“I don't think I can yet.”
“That's cool. Take your time.”
“You sounded good up there. I thought you guys went separate ways.” You fidget with your fingers, unable to move any other part of your body to look at him.
“We did. We just got the band together again.”
“You still got it.”
“You think so?” He still sounds so boyish when he says that.
“Hm-hmm.”
“I was hoping you'd come today.”
“Yeah? Why is that?” you keep your eyes glued to the pictures on the wall.
“Cause I needed to tell you that I didn't mean any of that shit I said when we broke up.”
“Duncan, you don't have to say anything. It's—”
“No. I do have something to say, cause I was a jackass. Thought that you deserved better than me. I knew if we stayed together, I'd hold you back. You were doing what you loved, and I'd have just gotten in the way so… I took the coward's way out. I thought that if you hated me, you'd just move on. Then it was too late when I realized that it was the biggest mistake I've ever made. I need you to know that.”
Listening to him opening that old wound makes your eyes well up, but you manage to reel those in.
“I tried to hate you,” you say. “Never could. Even when it hurt, even when I couldn't move on… I couldn't bring myself to hate you.”
It's then that you finally gather the courage to shift in your heels and face him.
“Hey.”
“Hey, you,” the way his lips curve up at the corners is utterly disarming. “I didn't think you'd talk to me.”
You shrug, “I didn't think so either. But here we are.”
“Here we are,” he echoes. “You look great.”
“You do, too.” And he does. Up close, you can see he's really grown up into his own with his simple dark suit and unbuttoned black shirt. “Look at you. You're wearing a suit, and you've gotten rid of that horrible mullet.”
“Yeah,” he laughs sheepishly, scratching the back of his nape, messing up his shaggy curls. “Would you have a drink with me?”
“Hmm,” you pause and try to decide whether that it's something that you'd like to do right now. “I don't think that's a good idea.”
“Why? Did you come here with anyone?”
“No, I just don't have anything else to say to you.”
“Are you still mad at me?”
You shake your head. “Whatever happened all these years ago is all water under the bridge, Duncan. You said what you wanted to say. I don't think it'd be healthy to sit down and keep rehashing the past.”
“Oh, I get it, you're scared.” He says with a teasing tone.
“I'm not scared.” You scoff, crossing your arms tightly against your stomach.
“No? You look terrified right now, hotshot.”
“I'm not.”
“Are so.”
“I'm not”
“Are so.”
“What, are we in school?” You bring a stop to it.
“Well, we are in a high school.”
You both stare at the other and break into laughter.
Duncan tucks both hands in his pockets and shrugs like he used to, biting his bottom lip with a smile before trying again.
“C'mon, let me buy you a drink for old times.”
“I think drinks are free.”
“Even better.”
“So I'm a cheap date now.”
“Hey, I didn't say anything about a date.” Duncan starts walking backwards, heading to the gym doors. “I'll be at the bar. Come. Don't come. It's up to you.”
You watch him disappear behind the big doors that clank upon closing. The music buzzing behind them temporarily comes to stop, and you hear murmurs in its place. You step closer to see through the window that Pam is taking the stage to inform everyone with mic in hand that games would start soon before letting the music resume. You look to the side to get a glimpse of Duncan taking a seat at the bar. Against your own wishes, your hands push the door open and let your feet zero in on his direction.
His face lights up when he sees you. He raises his glass up to you. “Look who decided to join me. I knew you couldn't resist.”
“Please, don't flatter yourself. I just needed a place to sit,” you say, parking your ass on the free bar stool beside him. “These heels are killing me.”
The waiter comes over, and you order another glass of wine while you watch Duncan go over a booklet left on the bar with the necessary information of all the attendees from the Class of 96.
“Is this true? You live in New York now?” Duncan shows up your page with your bio, and two pics of you side by side, one from your teen years and a recent one you send to Pam to assemble the class book.
“Hm-hmm.”
“And you write for a surfing magazine, huh?”
“Surfing magazine? What are you talking about? It’s called Surfeit. It has nothing to do with surfing.”
“I know,” he scoffs, “I was just messing with you.”
“Were you now?” You squint at him.
“Yeah, I gotta confess I’ve known for a while. I subscribed to that thing a few months ago.”
“Get out of here.”
“No, it’s true. I know you’re one of the founders. I’ve read all your pieces, I particularly liked the one about the invasion of the cum trees. It was fascinating.”
“Yeah? You think that one will put me on the right track for a Pulitzer?” You chuckle before taking a sip from your glass. “So, you’ve been keeping tabs on me.”
“Just recently.” He puts down the booklet and lifts his beer to his lips.
“Just recently? Why would you do that now?”
“Why?” he sighs. “I don’t know, I guess I missed talking to you. I found one of your articles online a few months ago, and it felt like I was hearing your voice when I read it, so I started looking for more, and I found Surfeit and I got most of them in the mail— It’s kinda pathetic, isn’t it?”
You balance your head side to side, measuring which side you lean on. “I think it’s sweet. I like this new side of you.”
“Which side?”
“You’re honest. Well, I suppose you always were, for the most part, but I used to have to pry words out of you when we weren’t talking about music, sports, or video games. I like that you offer them now without me asking, and that you’re capable of reading anything that didn’t come from a Playboy. I don’t think you were our target audience when we started the magazine, but I’ll take it.”
Biting his bottom lip, he looks down for a beat. “Okay, now it’s your turn to share something pathetic you’ve done to level the scales.”
“Hmm, I don’t think so.”
“Why not?”
“Cause I’m pretty sure I’d win, and you’d laugh at me.”
“C’mon, I promise I won’t laugh.”
Clearing your throat, you look down for a beat before confessing.
“You know, I was just thinking earlier, when you were playing on stage, about all the stuff I kept from you in a box and that I still have. All the mixtapes, the Car Fire albums, the tiara you bought me, all the anniversary presents… all the pictures… I’ve hauled them over several states. I took it by accident to London once. I just can't get rid of anything. I never look at what's inside, whatsoever. I don’t need to, but it's always there cause, you know… cause I’m a pathetic loser and I never got over you.”
You feel your face going numb as you finish saying that, and when you look at his eyes, you see that his smile has disappeared too. Is he pitying you? It’s the only thing you can read on his expression right now, and you instantly regret telling him that.
He opens his mouth to talk, but he takes too long to respond. And before he can say anything, you promptly stand up and try to head out the door.
Surfing the crowd, you bump into Pam.
“Hey, I was looking for you. Come on, games are starting. Sit down.”
“I was going to—” You point at the door with your thumb, but she doesn’t hear you. She grabs your arm and takes you to the tables where everyone is gathering.
Your weak protest attempt goes unheard by your friend, who leaves you alone once more to explain the first game on the microphone as someone else starts handing a sheet filled with trivia questions to everyone. They range from school-specific questions to 1996 pop culture. This is the last thing you wanna do right now, but you pick up a pen and start filling your answers without putting too much thought into them.
“Hi—” the high-pitched feedback from the microphone tears your eyes from the paper, and you find Duncan back on stage, strapping a guitar to his shoulder.
“I’m sorry I’m taking the stage again,” he says as the people from the organization committee start asking him to get down, with Pam fuming on the side.
“Actually, I’m not sorry. There’s someone here today and she… she opened her heart to me and I just stood there like an idiot cause I’m not good with words like she is. I… I thought I could say better with a song.”
You lock eyes with him instantly. You can see him swallowing the lump in his throat as he positions his hands on the guitar. He looks down at the strings for a beat before letting his fingers play the first chords. After a moment, his voice joins the melody in a mid-tempo rock ballad…
Your voice knocks down my own pride, All the things you wrote, all the things you shared. Sleepless nights, restless days. Guess I never figured out, How to let go, how to walk out.
Wish I had gone along, But baby, it’s too late now. If I could go back, I’d rewrite our last goodbye Instead of losing you that night.
There’s nothing like a fatal flaw, Caught up in my own fears and lies, I pushed you away, said you weren’t it. You walked away, I stayed right here Watching the years slip by.
Wish I had gone along, But baby, it’s too late now. If I could go back, I’d rewrite our last goodbye Instead of losing you that night.
And just for kicks, let’s pretend it’s 1996, We’re flying high, we’re back in that field The grass holding us up, watching stars collide.
Wish I had gone along…
Please tell me it’s not too late…
I’ll wait for you to say… baby, there’s still a chance.
The gym goes silent when the last chord fades away, and you can’t hear anything over the sound of your beating heart as you study every word sung in his song. You’re aware that all eyes are on you, expecting to see your next move, but you’re paralyzed in your seat.
Someone starts clapping, and the rest of the gym follow suit, breaking the spell you’re in.
You raise up from your chair and head out the door at a fast pace while the party resumes like nothing happened. You make it all the way to the courtyard and when you look back you see him following several yards behind, closely catching up.
Your feet come to a halt by the fountain, and you wait for him to face you.
“You know, you’re a liar,” you utter as he stops in front of you.
“All I said in that song was true.”
“No, you said you weren't good with words. I beg to differ.”
“You liked it?”
“Well, it wasn’t Bohemian Rhapsody, but it was good. It sounded like Oasis in their good years.”
“I mean, no one can beat Bohemian Rhapsody,” he snorts, shoving his hands in his pockets and shrugging in true Duncan fashion.
“Did you really mean it? If you could take it back, would you? You think we would’ve made it?”
“I meant every word of it, sweetheart. I never wanted to be with anyone else. I don’t know if we would have made it. I’d like to think that in another universe we did… You said you kept everything and I just choked up cause I did the same thing. I could never let you go, you know?”
“So, we’re just two wallowing assholes that couldn’t pick up the phone in 10 years?”
“Guess we are.”
“What do we do now?” You ask, folding your arms against your stomach.
“I don’t know. You tell me.”
“I’m not the same person you remember, Duncan. We can’t just pick it up like nothing happened.”
“I don’t think I am, either. Maybe we could just stay in contact and see where that goes?” He takes out a hand out of his pocket that comes with a cell phone attached to his fingers. “Here, put your number in there.”
“It's funny,” he says as you pick it up from his hand and start typing your number in his contacts.
“What's funny?”
“Us being here, standing on the same spot where I first asked you out.”
You gaze away from the phone for a second. “Right, I didn't notice that. What was it? Homecoming?”
“That's right.”
When you're done saving your number, you call yourself to have his number registered on your end and give it back with a warning look, “don’t make me regret this.”
“I won’t. I give you my word.” Duncan purposely clutches his fingers softly around your hand when reaching for the phone. He uses his opposite hand to caress the shape of your knuckles.
The familiar touch makes your hair stick out, your breath gets caught in the knot of your throat, wrapped in a layer of regrets and unsaid words. There’s an I love you trying to force its way out, but you don’t let it. You can’t. It’d be ridiculous if you did. Instead, you step closer and cup his face. He lets out a sigh, preparing for what’s coming as your face shortens the distance. The same magnetic pull that brought you to him the first time over ten years ago takes hold of you as you capture the warmth of his lips in a tender kiss. His hands, driven by that same force, smoothly travel to your waist to hold you closer against him. You sway with the gentle breeze as you allow your lips to move with his to the sweet rhythm of that song that still lingers in the way his tongue delves past your lips. As you're drawn into the depth of his mouth, you curl your arms around his neck in a tight lock as one of your hands slides into the back of his hair. He moans in your mouth as a reaction to your fingers massaging his scalp. It’s easy to get lost in that moment and forget how to breathe as your lips ache for more, for all those missed years of kisses, you suddenly feel fused with him making up for all that lost time.
You’re not sure who pulls back first, perhaps it’s both.
He’s just as breathless as you are when your lips part and your foreheads meet instead.
“Wow,” he says under a shallow breath.
“Yeah, wow,” your lips draw a smile.
“Do you wanna go back inside?”
You shake your head. “I like it here.”
— Credits: beautiful divider by @firefly-graphics
#jon bernthal#duncan carmello x reader#the class#duncan carmello#jon bernthal fanfiction#the class fanfiction#darlingwrites#bernthirst tv tribute#fluff#fanfiction
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The first Deanoru kiss in the comics made me scream back in the day but the confession moment right before it happened? It's so cute and also
Karolina's "holy shit???" face just takes me fucking out like lmao.
That lesbian thought she wasn't hearing this correctly or that she was dreaming. And I mean, understandable. Imagine you're Karolina. You've known Nico since you were kids, she basically became your best friend after you guys became Runaways and you also were realizing you were a lesbian at the time and you ended up developing the most insane crush for her. You tried to kiss her when you were 16 and she rejected you. You moved on, though, and you've dated two other people you genuinely liked. But you never really truly got over Nico: you gave up on her romantically and you two remain friends, but deep down you still have feelings for her. So imagine you're 18-19 now and you're single right now and you're just thanking your hot goth friend you're still in love with for being there for you, and she just goes and basically tells you that she regrets rejecting you because she has feelings for you too and asks you for another chance. Yeah a goofy face is reasonable. I would have just straight up exploded if I were her lmao
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Matt Murdock — Without Me
Pairing : Matt Murdock x (she/her) Reader Word Count : 3.9k Warning : Angst as requested but with fluff ending. Insecurity. Miscommunication/Misunderstanding. Synopsis : She knew, even without bringing the topic to light, that marriage was never an option with him. Notes : this fic was a request. If you like this story and would like to support me, please visit my kofi page and perhaps get me a coffee?☕
It was never easy.
No matter how many years they've spent together, the countless dates they went to, and the umpteen charming moments they've shared, dating Matt Murdock was never easy still.
Lord knows just how hard she tries to turn it off. To stop her mind from wandering to the dark places and to not think of the worst possible scenarios whenever the slightest inconvenience happens. She's tried her best, truly she has, to be a little more nonchalant whenever it comes to him, but it proved to be an impossible task to do. Perhaps when you care about someone a little too much than needed, the chance of keeping one's self collected inevitably becomes impossible.
Foggy and Marci’s wedding invitation laid proud on the coffee table, silently mocking her name whenever she was the only one left in the apartment. She knew, even without bringing the topic to light, that marriage was never an option with him. There’s just too many things in his hands, too many problems laid on his shoulders for him to ever weigh the possibility of matrimony.
She understood, a little too well, the reason for his silence. And though she once dreamed of having a family of her own, having mini versions of her and him running around the apartment and knocking over the cup of tea that would stain their rugged carpet, she’s learned to bury such thoughts in the deepest pit of her heart. She reckons, sacrificing something that she’s never had before would be less painful than losing the one she already has.
Five years of being loved by Matt Murdock would certainly make you a little too attached to the man.
But even with his gentle touch, the sweet nothings he whispered in her ears and the embrace he would always blanket her nights with, fear was never kept too far away. As much as she loves and understands him, as much as he worships and adores her, Matt was never an easy riddle to solve. His mind works with such complexity she’d never truly decipher. Oftentimes his actions speak much louder than his words and the past few days have only served as the new demons she has to battle with at night.
There’s always been more paperwork, more cases that needed his urgent attention before he could excuse himself out of the office, and even when his job was done, his other calls would already become too urgent for him to ignore. One too many rain checks done for their dates, that she couldn’t even bother asking if they could find a replacement date. Matt’s a busy man, his growing reputation and the demand Daredevil would have to serve at night were something she’s accepted, what she’s yet to understand, however, is his lack of communication. There were less words, less explanations and reassurance for her to hold on to. The blackhole that she’s currently drowning in was quiet and deadly. Something that he would not notice with the lack of presence.
Now she sits alone in their apartment, eyes vacant and barely blinking while her brain haywired. Perhaps this sudden change of action was caused by her wrongdoings. She tries to trace down every possible mistake she might have made, every misspoken word and unintentional actions, in an attempt to find a way to fix it. To apologise for whatever fault she’s committed before the sin stained a little too deep to ever be fixed.
If this was anyone else, she would’ve been upfront and ask if there’s anything wrong, confront the issue head-on without a care in the world, but this is Matt. He pushes people as easily as he draws them. One wrong movement and she fears all hell would break loose for them.
“Baby?” she heard Matt call, turning her head to see him entering from the staircase “What are you still doing up? It’s late.”
“I couldn’t sleep,” she answers, walking to him and taking his helmet away “Was it an easy patrol?”
“Quite, yeah. Not too bad but not too boring either,” he says with a grin “I’ve missed you.”
She sighs, letting his hands rest on her waist while hers encircle his neck, “Yeah, well, you’ve been busy.”
“I know, I’m sorry,” he says regretfully “Say, why don’t we go to that restaurant you’ve been wanting to try? The Italian one? How about this Friday, will you be free then?”
“I don’t know, will you? You’re the one who’s been so occupied lately.”
“I’ll be free on Friday, I promise,” he says excitedly, stealing a peck on her lips “So what do you say? Friday after work?”
Another tired sigh escapes her. Moments like this melts her worry away. Staring into his beautiful face, seeing that charming smile tugged on the corner of his lips, while his body was pressed against her. But as much as she treasures this, as much as she appreciates the comfort he could always bring her, she knew that the dark cloud would return the moment he’s out of her sight.
Gently, she leans in and kisses him. Matt’s grip on her shirt tightens, smiling between the kiss in satisfaction. Perhaps he misses her just as much as she missed him.
“Friday, it is.”
—-
She peeled herself off of the blanket with a huge sigh. The other side of the bed was cold, signifying that he’s been out for quite some time but she couldn’t find it in herself to frown. They do have a date afterwards. Perhaps Matt just wanted to make sure that he’s done all his work on time before they could escape their hectic lives for an hour or two.
It was still early for her to get ready for work, but coming early and finishing her tasks as soon as possible so she could have more time to doll herself up before the date sounds like a better plan to do. She sits up from the bed, hand carelessly reaching for the hair tie on the bedside table before knocking Matt’s phone in the process.
She picks up the item, thinking that it was one of the rare occurrences for him to forget his belongings. Reckon she really needs to get ready now so she could drop by his office and give him his phone, but her frown grows when someone calls.
“Hello?” she says as she picks it up.
“Oh, shit,” the other end of the line says before hanging up.
It was a woman. A voice that she was unfamiliar with. The twist in her gut grew, spreading through her veins like venom. She’s never one to pry on Matt’s phone, always confident in his loyalty, but given his absence and the strange call, her fingers couldn’t stop themselves from punching the passcode.
There was no text history with the caller, but there were several call logs, dating far into the past few weeks when he started to be ‘busy’. She wanted to call back the woman, ask her who she is and why she has been on frequent calls with her boyfriend, but she was too scared to face the possible truth. Too afraid to welcome the pour of the icy reality— that he’s found someone else.
“Oh, you’re up!” Matt says, cheeks flushed with slight panting “I forgot my phone.”
“Yeah, I know,” she answers, her voice caught in her throat. Still trying to process the event that’s just happened and how to act in front of him “I— Someone— Gwyneth called.”
“Oh,” his tongue darts to lick his lips, visibly looking nervous now “What did she say?”
“Nothing, she— She hung up.”
“Your heart is beating fast,” Matt notes “Are you okay?”
“Yeah, I just— Did you run back here?”
“I did, yeah. I was already at the office when I realised I'd forgotten my phone. I need it for the case I’m currently working on,” he answers, walking to her with careful steps “Can I have it, please?”
She swallows the lump in her throat, handing him the item in silence.
“Thank you,” Matt says, placing a kiss on the crown of her head “Listen, I have to run back, I’m having a meeting with a client in five minutes. I’ll see you later for our date, okay?”
She was still silent, breath hitched and sweats forming in the back of her neck.
“Baby?”
“Yeah, okay,” she finally answers, looking up to meet his eyes “I’ll see you later.”
Matt hesitated. He looks as if he was debating to ask something, looking conflicted over whatever it is that might be troubling his mind but the words died in his tongue. Perhaps unsure if he would want to pour petrol over the turmoil that’s evidently building between them. His finger taps on the phone in his palm as he says instead, “I love you.”
She forces a smile, knowing that he wouldn’t be able to see it but it was the only attempt she could pull to suppress the tears that were slowly watering her eyes, “I know.”
“You’re not gonna say it back?”
“You know I love you,” She says, kissing the back of his hand that was holding the phone “Go, you’re going to be late for the meeting.”
Matt smiles, stealing a kiss from her lips before heading back out.
—-
Her breathing was rigid. The movement of her chest forced as if trying her best to compose herself. Her lips were pressed in a tight smile, chewing her meal silently as she tried to focus on the words Matt was saying.
She tries, God knows she tries, to forget about this morning’s incident. Perhaps Gwyneth was the client he was supposed to meet. It surely isn't strange for him to have frequent calls with her if that was the case, but why does it feel wrong? Why does it feel like there’s something bigger that she wasn’t aware of? Why does it feel as if there was something Matt wasn’t telling?
“Love,” Matt calls, taking her hand slowly in his “Are you alright? You’ve been awfully quiet.”
“Yeah, I’m fine,” she lies through her teeth.
“Are you sure? Your heart has been beating like crazy all night.”
“Yeah, well, maybe stop listening to my heartbeat for once, Matt.”
The smile on his face waters, surprised to hear her bitter spat.
“I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to sound as cruel,” she sighs, taking her hand away from him to rub her temples “I just have a lot of things in mind.”
Matt sighs, nodding in understanding, “Do you want to talk about it?”
Yes, she wanted to say, let’s talk about the affair you’re having behind me.
But is she ready? Is she ready to be stripped off of the fantasy that she’s tried so hard to build with him? Is she ready to bid goodbye to all the dreams and hopes she’s made with him? Is she ready to accept the fact that there would be no Matt in her future?
It was pathetic, sure, to hold on to the last strings of hope when the most possible outcome is laid bare in front of her. To be stubborn for once against the demons that are torturing her mind. But Matt is the only good thing in her life she’d never be ready to lose. He is the one thing she would rather risk her life for than to ever be separated from. Even if she has to turn a blind eye and pretend as if the romance they’re living in was pure and innocent.
“No, it’s fine,” she says, letting out a sigh to collect her composure “How’s your meeting? Did it go well?”
“Splendid. Listen, I have something to talk to you about,” he says, deflecting the topic. Matt takes a nervous gulp. His hands are now under the table, invisible to her eyes “I– Uh, I don’t know where to start.”
A sharp gasp escaped her lips as the tears threatened to form on her eyes. This must be it. The nervousness that has been bleeding out of him, the continuous rambling he does the whole night to mask his uneasiness, the way he keeps on rubbing his palm on his trousers. This must be it. This must be their end.
“You know how we’ve been together for quite some time now,” Matt starts, his hands still hidden under the table “I know five years with me must not have been the easiest for you. I know just how difficult it could be, living with me and accepting the life that I’m living in. I know that we didn’t always have sunshine and rainbows. Most of the time we have storms and thunders, really, yet we’re still here. You’re still here,” He says gently, his left hand reaching for hers “I know that you deserve better, that you can find someone better—”
She abruptly stood on her feet, letting his hand go in the process that he retreats it fast and hides it under the table once again. Her breathing was heavy, tears threatening to fall from her eyes.
“Baby, what’s wrong?” Matt asks with a worried tone, still sitting on his seat.
“I have to get out of here.”
“W-What?”
She spared him no other word, grabbing her purse and bolting herself out of the restaurant.
Her heart was hammering inside her chest. By the time she hailed for a taxi, her cheeks were already wet with tears. The night she’s been looking forward to, the one date she hoped would flush all of her worries down the drain, turns out to be her worst nightmare. Never would she ever expect Matt to be this cruel. To lead her on, promising a lovely date when they haven’t seen each other for so long, only to break up with her before the clock strikes at nine. With an illicit affair she wasn’t aware of until the very morning, should one add.
“Wait, wait,” Matt says, stopping the taxi door before it closes “Where are you going? What happened?”
“Just leave me alone, Matt, please,” she begs through her tears.
“Baby, why are you crying?”
“Leave me alone, Matt. I don’t want to see you tonight.”
“I— What did I do?”
“Just— Please, don’t make it any harder than it already is.”
Matt was appalled, confused as to what might trigger this response, but he could feel just how upset she was. Her body was shaking, fingers trembling as they frantically wiped the tears that kept on flowing. Never had he ever seen her this distraught and Matt was scared that he would do more harm than good to try and talk with her about it, so he surrenders, “Okay, we’ll go home, okay? Let me just pay for dinner first.”
“No, I’m not going home. I told you, I don’t want to see you, okay!” She says, this time with a raise of voice as her anger slowly seeps in “I just want you to leave me alone, is that really too much to ask for?”
Hurt was evident on his face now, but she was too caught up with her own emotions to notice it.
“Please, Matt,” She begs, her voice hoarse in plea “Please let me go.”
Matt nods, ceasing his last attempt to hold her as he closes the taxi door. He listens as the driver steps on the gas, driving her away to wherever it is she might go. Though the car drives further from him, the sound of her sobs only grows louder in his ear. He wasn’t sure what he did, what he said that might have prompted this response, but whatever it is, he knew that he’s royally ruined what could’ve been the best night of their lives.
—-
It has been a week since she fled Hell’s Kitchen. She knew that there’s no corner in the city that he wouldn’t scour to find her, so she had to go a little farther to find shelter. She needed time and space to think, to take in the cruel reality that has finally caught up with her, before she could take baby steps towards acceptance.
On the second day, she no longer breaks in tears whenever she looks into her phone and see the many messages Matt has left. By the fourth day, she could partly accept the fact that their ship had sunk. That trying to mend what’s been broken would only restrain him from his freedom, from loving the one person he might actually meant to be with. She loves him, too much for words to ever truly express it, but if being with another woman brings him better happiness, then she would sacrifice herself and blow the candle out. She would let him go.
The suffocation she feels in her lungs the moment she steps in the apartment was unbearable but she dragged her feet still. She whispers her silent goodbye, fingers tracing the walls of the apartment that she would soon leave. Her eyes study the surroundings, memorising each detail of Matt’s loft that she loved so much before she’s no longer welcomed.
She wonders if whoever would live with him next would keep the flower vase by the window. She wonders if they would change the lights in the living room. She wonders if they would paint the walls and fix the squeaky bathroom door. She wonders just how much of her remnants would be left untouched.
“You’re home,” Matt greets, breathless as if he just jolted out of bed.
It’s clear to see that he was in a wreck. The stubbles on his face were unkempt, new bruises littering his body. Matt looks defeated. Like he’s been dragged through a losing war and shattered beyond saving.
“I’m just here to take my things,” she says with a shaky voice, trying her best to keep herself calm and collected “I won’t take long. I’ll take whatever I couldn’t pack today on the weekends.”
“Where are you going?” He frowns, tilting his head a little in confusion “Why are you leaving?”
“Well, I’ve held you back long enough, haven’t I? It’s about time I let you go,” she says with a heartbroken sniffle, forcing a self-pitying smile “I won’t keep you from anyone, anymore. You’re free.”
Matt takes a few steps closer, his brows knitted as he finds himself further lost in the conversation, “Hold me back— Free— What are you talking about?”
“It’s what you wanted, isn’t it? The other night? You wanted to break up with me,” she explains, swallowing the hard pill “I understand. I’ve accepted it, too. We don’t have to go through that conversation again.”
“Break up— What?”
“Matt, don’t play dumb with me,” she says with her patience wearing thin “I know everything. I know why you’ve been so busy lately. I know about your affair with Gwyneth, I know it all.”
“Affair? Gwyneth?” Matt questions, running a hand through his hair as he tries to place the puzzle pieces together “What are you talking about?”
“Look, you can really stop being a douche and just get off with it, alright? Do you really expect me to spell it to you? You cheated on me with Gwyneth. There, I said it.”
“I— What makes you think that I cheated on you with her?”
“Well, you’ve been gone. You have lots of call logs with her and they all aligned to the days when you started being distant. And that day when she called, she hung up because she heard my voice, didn’t she? She was scared that I’d find out about you two, well, guess what, I did.”
Matt’s lips were parted. The crease on his forehead was still deep as he tried to let her words sink in. He visibly looks baffled to the point that she starts to wonder if she’s making the right sense, but she wouldn’t let that puppy eye and innocent look on his face water her walls down. She’s given more than enough understanding for him to ever play her this way.
“Well? What do you have to say about yourself?” she asks, folding her hands in front of her chest “No arguments to defend yourself, Mr. Attorney?”
The corners of his lips tugged upward as he let out a satisfied sigh. Colours returned to his face the moment his brain caught up with her words. Like a lightning bulb glowing after it's been switched on. Without a word, Matt walks back to the bedroom. He returned not even a minute later with a small box in his hand.
“I have not been cheating on you,” he begins, taking one of her hands gently “I would never, ever, betray us like that. I love you too much to ever think about anyone else.”
“But Gwyneth—,”
“Gwyneth is a jeweller that has been helping me find the right ring for someone,” Matt cuts in, opening the box for her to see “I didn’t know what kind of ring you’d like, what design or what gem you’d like on it, so I looked for some personal jeweller to help me out.”
She was left speechless, looking down to the ring with utter embarrassment.
“When you picked up her call, she was trying to tell me that the ring was ready, but she didn’t expect you to answer. She was caught off guard, scared that she might spoil your surprise.”
Her head hangs low. Just how ridiculously stupid could she be. She was ashamed of thinking the worst, labelling names on Matt that should never have even crossed her mind. How is she supposed to apologise now after ruining their moment? After tainting their relationship red? Would she even have the chance to mend what she’s broken when she’s betrayed the trust between them?
“Hey,” Matt calls, holding her chin up gently “I've never cheated on you. There was never anyone else and there will never be. There’s only you, just you, and no one else.”
“I’m sorry,” she cries “I’m so, so sorry.”
“Hey, it’s okay, it’s just a misunderstanding,” he says with a chuckle, pulling her for a hug and rubbing her back “It’s okay, Baby. It’s my fault for being too occupied too, I’m sorry.”
“No, you don’t get to apologise, okay? It’s only going to make me feel worse,” she sobs in his embrace “I should’ve known better. I should’ve trusted you or at the very least asked about Gwyneth, before jumping into conclusions.”
“Well, honestly, if you asked me about her, I wouldn’t have known what to say either. I’m not the best of a liar in front of you,” he answers, letting out a sigh “That morning I knew your heart was beating erratically but I was too scared to ask because I didn’t want you to ask about her. I didn’t have the answers to give without spoiling the surprise.”
She let go of the hug, wiping her tears while his hands still rested on her waist, “I’m sorry I ruined the surprise.”
“It doesn’t really matter. What matters is your answer,” Matt says with a nervous smile, letting go of his hold and kneeling in front of her now “I’m just gonna keep it short before either of us falls into another misunderstanding,” he says before the two of them break into a short laughter “Will you marry me?”
Her grin spreads, nodding as she kneels to his level, “Yes, yes, of course.”
Matt beams as he slips the ring on her finger. A satisfied exhale came out of him. Like he's just successfully removed mountains from his own shoulders. He pulls her for a kiss, hands cupping on cheeks gently, “I love you.”
“I love you, Matt Murdock,” she answers, her hand combing the strands of his hair with her fingers “You’re really a wreck without me, huh?”
He lets out a sigh, stealing another kiss through their laughter, “You have no idea.”
#matt murdock#matt murdock x reader#matt murdock angst#matt murdock imagine#matt murdock fanfic#matt murdock fanfiction#matt murdock fluff#matt murdock x you#matt murdock x oc#matt murdock scenario#matt murdock scenarios#matt murdock x y/n
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hello!!!! i was wondering if you have any fem-presenting aziraphale recs? :) i adore her very much and would love to read more fics about her!
Hi! We have a #female aziraphale tag, so do check that out. Here are more fics to add...
On Your Doorstep by miss_minnelli (E)
“Don’t you think it would be easier to already have a kid before you fall in love?” Crowley asked. “What?” “If you already had a kid, and then you started dating your ideal person, you wouldn’t have to worry about all the drama and hardship of having a kid together and that relationship wouldn’t be tainted.” Zira raised her eyebrows. “So you’re saying you’d rather have kids with someone that you’re not that romantically interested in and then what, break up with them for your dream person?” ... Zira and Crowley, friends since university, are the last two single people in their group of friends. Neither wants to be part of one of those couples whose kids destroy their relationships, so instead of waiting for their perfect matches, Zira and Crowley decide to platonically have a baby together.
Honeysuckle & Heat Waves by pilatesandpinot (E)
Ezera Fell has returned to the town where she’d spent her summers growing up – seaside Tadfield, where the slogan is “Everyday is a Holiday” and the perfect escape for a recent divorcee like herself. But she isn’t just here for holiday or to “get her groove back”; she’s inherited her late aunt Agnes Nutter's bed and breakfast and is determined to restore it to its former glory. She’s consulted the help of the best gardener in town, except there’s one issue: he’s Anthony Crowley, the same man she serendipitously had a one-night stand with while on holiday in Paris. Will the sparks fly now that they’ve been reunited, or fizzle out?
Against Expectations by Blue_Sparkle, summerofspock (E)
After being pressured by their families into a marriage neither of them want, Aziraphale and Crowley resign themselves to an unfulfilling life together. For Aziraphale that means trying to be the dutiful wife she was always taught to be and for Crowley it means hiding an important part of who he is.
Star of the Wooded Mountain by jamgrl (T)
Going back to camp shouldn’t have been hard. Yeah, okay, there was the gender-queer thing and the whole, uh, gendered cabin situation. And, yeah, being a counselor wasn’t going to be the same as being a camper. But Tony loved everything else about camp. Tony loved the woods and the creek and the s’mores. Mostly, though, Tony loved Azira. And they were afraid. That they would be a bad counselor, that Azira would stop liking them. Twelve weeks was a long time, and Tony didn’t know if their life was going to fall together or fall apart.
10,000 Hours by AnnaTheHank (E)
Rich playboy Anthony Crowley has finally broken the last straw. He's been disowned by his grandmother, and turned away by his family. With no money and no where to go, he heads to the old family cabin to lay low until it all blows over. Romance writer A.Z. Fell has been given use of her publisher's cabin to get away from the city and work on her newest book-her first erotica. Neither expected the other to be there, but there they both were. And AZ finds that Crowley's vast knowledge of sex may just make up for her own lacking knowledge when it comes to writing her book.
Within These Castle Walls by christi_writes (E)
Victorian AU. A celebration at an aristocrat’s castle turns deadly with a murder most foul. Paranormal encounters at every dark turn, humans going carnal left and right, and if that stupid Duke puts his hands on Aziraphale one more bloody time, Crowley was going to lose it. -Or- Circa 1880's Victorian Era. Crowley's just woken up from his century nap and the world has changed, including Aziraphale.
- Mod D
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The thing I love most about Billy Hargrove is his unpredictability, in a show where we can see every other character’s moves from MILES away. Even those who had the potential to be the most interesting are either side-lined, ignored or return to old patterns (see Johnatan, Will or Steve). Also, they all have one thing in common, even El: they all want to be good. To do good. To be heroes. And I would not find anything wrong with that, if it only weren’t for the predictability of it all.
We see Steve Harrington with the kids in a dangerous situation. What do we assume? That he is gonna throw himself in danger for them, because it’s what he has always done.
We see Nancy Wheeler on the battle field? Then there is a 100% chance she is gonna shoot at something.
Will Byers? He is gonna protect his friends, just like the rest of the party.
Jim hopper? Joyce Byers? Yeah. Same thing.
Billy Hargrove, tho? Jesus. He is introduced to this metal badass song, then the next minute he is taunting Steve Harrington, but not really because here he is, actually giving him good advice and- yeah no, he pushed him onto the ground again. But wait, wait! He actually told him not to worry about the break up because he could basically have anyone he wanted with a face like that… aaaand yeah, he is back to being an ass.
We see him not giving a crap about his sister, yet later he is asking her if a boy has been bothering her. Then he grabs her wrist and tells her very hurtful things, yet he still tries to make it sound like a lesson. Like he had been that road before himself, many times.
We see him being stone cold, with an absent look in his eyes when he is with other people. Then we watch him dancing in his room and smiling as he gets ready for a date, and later we see him crying for the first time ever after being hit by his father. While watching the first minutes of that scene, I did not expect that to happen in the slightest.
We see him fake his concern for max to mrs. wheeler in order to get information, only to watch him refer to her as his sister when he realizes that Steve Harrington might have done something to her.
We have literally seen him trying to scare Max by driving at an ungodly speed, almost running her friends over, and almost killing Steve in a fit of rage, and then in the next season he is using every inch of his strength to protect a girl he didn’t even know from the Mind Flayer. I don’t know y’all, but I did NOT see all of that coming.
And do you know who, after his death, becomes the most interesting ST character among the protagonists? Max. We see a crack in her armour of perfection, thanks to her rocky relationship with Billy: because she had wished him to die, sometimes. I loved that twist, because FOR ONCE I had a feeling that a character among the mains was deeply flawed and human. This is why billy was needed for longer in this story.
He forced the other characters to face their darkest side, their egotistical desires. Steve Harrington enjoyed violence, deep down. He was the one to start the fight, after all. And Billy had forced him to meet that side of himself again.
Max was so fed up with him that she had dreamed about his death sometimes, even tho we all know now that she didn’t mean it.
Karen Wheeler lusted after a boy her daughter’s age, only to be met with shame when she saw her husband and daughter asleep on the couch.
Honestly, all of this to say that Stranger Things can keep its perfect ‘didn’t-do-anything-wrong-aver’ characters, because honestly? I watch tv series to be entertained and surprised, and since Billy died he also took the dynamism of the series with him.
#billy hargrove#stranger things#stranger things meta#dacre montgomery#steve harrington#harringrove#max and billy
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his favorite was the architect, he thinks. he's got deep brown eyes and a smile like an apple slice, with lips that taste just as tart.
he was only thirty at the time (only thirty, as if he isn't well into adulthood)
"I'm sorry," his smile wasn't as crisp as it usually is. "I think you're a great guy."
The compliment didn't dampen the blow. Aizawa sat there, gripping the marbled edge of his apartment's countertop, face neutral. He finds silence makes people to stupid things; the architect kept talking.
"The surgery: it's a lot to handle," he explained. "We've only been dating for a couple months, it's just so soon."
Ten, to be specific. Aizawa still doesn't say anything, and it pulls more and more from his mouth.
"Come on, Shouta. I-- You're asking a lot. I didn't sign up to be a caretaker."
"I don't need you to be a caretaker." He's already lost the war, but Aizawa needs to defend his honor. "I've done this before."
He's an expert at it all by now. The lavender stench of hospital cleaner is ingrained into his nose, so deep that he tastes it in his dreams.
"I mean, come on, Shouta, the healing time alone is longer than we've been together. It's not like we could go for hikes-" They've never hiked. "Or out to a club, or, or- you'll be in a wheelchair for months."
It's another revision surgery, to help the prosthetic sit better and hopefully end that phantom pain that's been clamping his leg for the past ten years. In theory, on the other side, he'll be more active than ever.
(It doesn't happen. The pain dims, but never dies.)
"You really expect me to stop living my life? To just sit in this apartment with you and just, what? Be quiet?"
Aizawa rubs where his thigh meets silicone. "So, you'd rather me sit alone."
This time, the architect is silent.
Different anon but for aizawa and terrible dates, what are some of the other reasons or professions of the other dates?
He really hasnt dated a lot. there was a teacher, an architect, someone from Mic and Nemuri's club, and a fellow engineer-
most of the time it's because he's lonely. he'd NEVER admit it, but he's getting older, his house is quiet...
sometimes, it's to try and move on.
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Day 57
also i feel like this is a reletable problem, honestly for any single person
does anybody just constantly dream of dating someone? mine are coNSTANT, like always dating someone that either i knew in the past/ i don't know/ a fictional character
#i used to have ONLY nightmares growing up#and now it's just dreams of dating people#im not sure i like this change#mlm thoughts#vent blog#mlm#mlm yearning#gay#gay thoughts#vent#trans#single gay#calling all single ladies
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hot take moment cwilbur is literally just psychotic as all hell and i think people got way too comfortable villianizing the shit out of a man who was clearly portraying signs of severe mental illness. cwilbur was like im so fucking paranoid and scared and i think everyone is out to get me and hurt me and ive spiralled to the point i cant reach out to the people closest to me because im so afraid and lost in this spiral and im having constant panic attacks and hurting myself because i dong know what to do with myself and the only way out for me is to die. and everybody was like EVIL MAN WHO ENJOYS HURTING OTHERS AND IS ABUSIVE ON PURPOSE AND A VILLAIN AND SHOULD NEVER BE TRUSTED AGAIN. and then he came back and was like im still deeply troubled and afraid but im desperately trying to make up for the wrongs i did in the past and the people i hurt in my own way and communication is really hard for me but i hope people know that im truely sorry and i love them. im going to try my hardest to fix this in the only way i know how and then respectfully remove myself from the situation because i feel thats the kindest thing i can do to the people ive hurt. and people were like ABUSER ABUSER ABUSER EVIL MAN ABUSER. like girl
Yeah no based true real no questions asked
I'd hope I manage to portray Wilbur the way he deserves in my content, cause that man is heavily bpd coded and he just needs therapy and someone who genuinely loves him but also can handle his bullshit (which has exclusively and reliably been Quackity like, canonically)
But yeah no completely agreed. The man has issues and has definitely fucked up a lot but at the end of the day he really does need love and care and patience, but also boundaries (and therapy and meds, obviously)
#i deeeefinitely have no reason to have strong feelings about bpd bitches deserving love and care and stability ha ha nooo it's definitely-#-not like I've been dating one for well over 4 years now and even though we've been through so much shit together and I still can't-#-understand why people with bpd and conditions that have similar symptoms are so demonised. It just makes no sense to me.#my bf is the love of my life and i can't imagine /not/ supporting it through all the splitting and episodes and all of that cause they're-#-absolutely worth everything#i don't know not to be too gay on main but tbf it's too late now anyway i think--#is it unstable? sure. but it's also the most caring and loving person i've ever been close with and it always makes sure i'm ok#and it loves me so undeniably deeply no matter what purely for who i am#i've never had anyone care about me this much and this genuinely and this unconditionally - it'd always be what /they/ can get out of /me/#but my boyfriend just cares about me - the actual me - no matter if i'm acting how it imagined i'd act. what matters is if i'm /me/#listen bpd isn't sunshine and rainbows - we've been through some TERRIBLE shit (including s-cide attempts)#but when people claim it makes a relationship toxic/abusive it's so stupid cause ultimately with mutual love support and reassurance-#-and professional help you can have a genuinely happy and healthy life with someone with bpd#love isn't mean to be easy. it's meant to be safe and supportive and genuine but a relationship always takes effort and work on both sides#you should never sacrifice your well being of course!#but when love takes effort and extra care it doesn't inherently mean it's unhealthy or toxic or abusive. it just means you're people.#tldr if you love someone then don't care about some diagnosis - care about the actual perso.#ask#asks#ask fern#tntduo#dsmp#tnt duo#wilbur soot#quackity#quackbur#dream smp#tntblr#c!quackbur#c!tntduo
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"an untitled portrait by Van Dyck, 1621"
(watercolor on paper, 9"x12", 2024)
also on ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/57560983
inspired by this post/fic by @cuubism
https://cuubism.tumblr.com/post/699751218188353536/a-van-dyck-dream-drawled-dragging-a-light
https://archiveofourown.org/works/42802623
#the sandman#sandman fanart#dream of the endless#dreamling#watercolor#my art#fanart#this is now categorically the most ridiculous thing I have Ever done artistically#I do not recommend trying to make a fake oil painting by using watercolors at about a sixth the size of what it should be..#probably the most hours ive put into a single painting thus far in my life. maybe not I used to do acrylic but. even still probably.#the fricken research I did. looking up chairs and crap. trying to choose a date. goddamn historical clothing#anyway I hope at least a few people see this and understand just how insane I am for it :)
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