#and now it hit me full force
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Oh my god, I just got hit with Such a hardcore urge to do a fresh reinstall of Skyrim and rebuild my mod list from the ground up that it's making it Impossible to focus on anything else and I was supposed to be writing a paper for one of my uni classes today, like why, brain??? Why NOW??? 😭😭
Feels like Im not gonna be able to get my hands on anything else until I do it and it might as well take the whole day ahhhhowpghhiulaergnilaengnalg the fuck is this, help 😭😭
#personal#Raksh's gaming adventures#Skyrim#is it because I started thinking about the Kaidan custom follower mod? maaaaybe#it's my friends fault tbh#we've been discussing all sorts of games for months#we're gaming buddies now in that way lmao#we got to talking Skyrim few weeks ago and I guess the thought has been building in the back of my head#and now it hit me full force#possibly bcs I have some free time this week and no pressing deadlines??#I mean I need to write and send this paper over before the month ends so#it's not registering as super urgent to my brain#I was just trying to be responsible by writing it early but#I just can't focus rn 😭😭#it really is NOT leaving me alone#what in the HELL is this?? some undiagnosed ADHD thing Im unaware of??#tbf I have no idea if I have ADHD but a lot of the symptoms seem to fit so I dunno#and this is WEIRD#like yeah okay maybe if I Force myself to write the paper I will (at least a bit of it)#but the URGE#overwhelming ngl#and I just found out there's a way to reroll the Anniversary update to Special edition so it IS possible to do a fresh reinstall#I NEED#euihfniladnglang;jad#okay Im gonna go#at least try to start the paper and then we'll see I guess#(watch me reinstall and build a whole new modlist before the day ends jdagjinidngjd)#I also need to do a backup of all the files I have#good thing I never deleted any of the downloaded mod files#there are some there not available anymore on Nexus and I NEED them
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sick :(
#personal#euuuugh#i could feel the cold brewing these past few days#and now it hit me full force#rip#at least i get to stay at home tho
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Hang on wait. Probably been said already but I'm watching the stream so it's on my mind.
I think it's something to say how Gabriel's two phases work in both of his boss battle. Judge of Hell (3-2) starts out with his very uptight, arrogant monologue- he has a role and purpose to fulfill. He truly believes that he's going to win this fight. And then, when V1 proves it can put up a fight, he gets pissed. +Enraged, phase two, he's going to destroy this pile of scrap. And then he loses.
He loses everything. His divine light has been severed. All that remains is perfect hatred. Apostate of Hate (6-2) starts with one of the best pre-boss monologues I've ever heard and then it's right into Enraged. Because Gabriel is already fucking furious. This worthless machine has taking everything from him and he's going to make it pay. There is no reason to be calm and ordeal, this machine just needs to die.
Then the fight goes on, same as last time, and Gabriel starts to learn. This fight against the machine shakes his entire faith and he enjoys it. He loves the fight. He's laughing, he's enjoying it, he's having a grand old time because for the first time ever he's fighting for his own will. Not God's, not the Council's, but his own will. The anger gives way to glee and he returns to his normal form in Phase 2, no longer enraged, but enjoying it.
And then he's defeated for the second time and all he feels is relief. Everything he has ever known, his faith, his loyalty, has been shattered. His will is now, and will forever- or, at least, for the next few hours he has left to live- be his own. All he feels is relief.
#And then he becomes a VTuber#Arrogance to annoyance to rage to enjoyment....... literally the character arc of all times#I love you Infinite from the hit game Sonic Forces you are everything to me#This entire thing is incomprehensible and definitely has been said before. But I just needed to say it#“ENOUGH!” upon entering the second phase for 3-2 versus “IS THAT THE BEST YOU'VE GOT??” and laughter in 6-2.............#The fucking dialogue in the two fights too#If I wasn't so busy with three other things right now I would do a full analysis#Ultrakill#Gabriel Ultrakill#Amoeba's Ramblings
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my fields of mistria farmer! really like the game!
#fields of mistria#fom#fom farmer#oc art#art#artists on tumblr#2024 art#princus doodles#farmer murine#murine basil#i'll definitely update that date outfit once i have a better option cuz i dont rlly like that buuuuut oh well it's fine for now!#murine's lil headwings darken in the summer#then they get hidden by lil caps in the fall cuz of it getting colder but also to hide pinfeathers#feathers that then stay for the winter and p much instantly fall out once spring hits#their hair also grows v fast#im focusing on the museum now since im at the final stretch of whats currently available of the mines (tho i will have to venture back in)#my urge to go dig did return full force at least after the mushroom incident#murine means of or relating to rodents so i am v excited to get capybaras soon (bonus murine having that fruit on their head for the beach)#which i should have titled the swim outfit “beach” but it's fine#my flora section in the museum is nearly complete i just need the last few ones in the mines#i love fishing in games yet it took me so long to make a rod cuz there was just so much to do !!!!#i do also love mistria's fishing it's like a better animal crossing
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sorry im coping with aus again oopsie daisy. anyway here's my take on a fantasy au
it all started with me rewatching the D&D movie and thinking "hm. what (broad) classes would the neighbors have?"
and after much thinking i came to the conclusion: Barnaby = Bard / Eddie = Paladin / Sally = Sorcerer / Julie = fighter / Frank = monk / Howdy = Artificer / Poppy = Healer / Wally = 'Wizard'
those seem fitting! BUT i don't like restrictions or rules so in this very light worldbuilding for a casual (strongly glaring at myself here) CASUAL au, it's only dnd-esque. not actually dnd yk yk
in my head, they're not technically puppets for this au. they're flesh and blood, they've got bones, etc. they're actual Creatures, though they still look like Them! Julie's still pink w/ candy-corn-horns! Frank is still a gray tube! Barnaby is a big blue dog! they're just... not puppets. it's the same for the other beings in this fantasy world - they all keep the style, but they're all flesh n' blood if that makes sense. a cartoony fantasy world
so they have their little found family adventuring group titled, of course, The Neighborhood. because when they were first forming, Wally went "oh! are we a neighborhood? i've always wanted neighbors!" and it Stuck. so they all lovingly refer to each other as neighbors, even though the closest they get to being actual neighbors is pitching their tents next to each other & staying at an Inn in neighboring rooms
like your classic group of adventurers, they're almost constantly on the move. the longest they stay in one place is a couple of months - the rest of the time they're wandering! they take quests, get roped into general Shenanigans, etc. they adventure! and get into a lot of battles of varying severity
so Barnaby is still kiiiiind of a bard? best i can describe him is jack-of-all-trades moral support! he provides battle music, keeps the mood light, and stands off to the side to offer quips and tips. he prefers not to fight, and only Gets Involved when the others need Backup. even then, he usually takes the role of defending his neighbors. he has a good eye for whether or not physical support is needed - he never needs to be asked when there's a legitimate need for him! unless he's thoroughly distracted from the goings-on. he does have magic, but it's more for show / defense-based
Eddie's still pretty classically a paladin. healing powers, armor, there to be on the front lines and Protect! the group's sword and shield! he technically serves a god but he forgot who <3 he just makes the occasional general offering and mumbles some vague prayer. he's super friendly! super helpful! super willing to dive into the line of fire! Will disregard his own safety without a second thought! his magic is pretty much restricted to healing, and it's weak healing at that (maybe because he can't properly serve his god...), so it's mostly good for quick mid-battle heals and little wounds. temporary fixes!
Sally has innate fire/light magic, and she's very showy with it! she puts Flair and Pizazz into all of her casts and is very dramatic on the battlefield - she manages to turn her fights into a performance. She tag-teams keeping the Neighborhood entertained with Barnaby. he handles the humor/lightheartedness, she handles the escapism/encouragement. she writes scripts & stories in her off-time, and often reads them (or spins a new one) after dinner. when they have weeks / month breaks in one spot, sometimes she'll recruit local thespians to create a play
Frank is all about that hand-to-hand combat babey! he wants to feel bones break under his fists! he wants those split knuckles! he very often starts fights, and even more often finishes them - what he lacks in raw power he makes up for in vicious tenacity. he just Keeps On Going! he seconds as the group's Knowledge Guy. while his hobby is studying insects, he also catalogues/studies monsters and enemies and terrain so that the Neighborhood can always be prepared. the only time he stays out of fights is when he's researching or note-taking. he tries to micromanage the battle from afar anyway
Julie is like... put a druid, a fighter, and a barbarian in a blender. she's got a big sword! she's got seemingly endless energy in battle! she can talk to plants, especially flowers! her flora magic is very minor, so it's not like she's making giant roots burst out of the ground and strangle people. but plants can give her information, and if she asks nicely and they feel like it, sometimes they'll help her out. in battle she's a force to be reckoned with! nothing will stop her and her sword! she's usually the second (closely following Frank, with Eddie hot on her heels) Neighbor charging into battle - but she's the one with the stellar war cry! & where Sally and Barnaby tend to the Neighborhood's emotional wellbeing & entertainment, Julie keeps things fresh with Physical Activities during their downtime!
Poppy is a powerful healer! she draws on an individual's energy (often taps into her own as well) to convert it into healing power. it's draining but it's damn good healing! she also takes the role of the Neighborhood's cook (the others still like to help, especially Frank who is essentially her sous-chef) and makes sure they're all healthy. she hangs back during battles, waiting to (and hoping that she doesn't have to) heal a wounded Neighbor. if one of them is badly hit, she forces herself to run into battle and drag them to safety before working on their injury. she has a tiny bit of illusion magic, which she'll cast from afar to assist her Neighbors. she tries not to use it outside of emergencies - it takes a lot of energy, which she tries to conserve just in case.
Howdy has Zero Magic! none! four hands and none of them are magical! however, he's a damn good inventor & a whiz at potion making. he can Use magical items like there's no tomorrow - he just can't wield it himself. he supplies the group with potions, helpful items, all sorts of goodies - given that they can trade for it with anything he'd accept in-canon. the only exception is when they're mid-battle - he hands stuff out when needed without haggle. he supplies the group with their cash when they're not getting it from looting/quests - he has a magic backpack that can unfold into a fully-stocked merchant stall! he sells at towns, on the road, anywhere he can! In battle he hangs back with Poppy and, yes, supplies items, but he also uses ranged attacks - magical weapons that cast for him, magic 'bombs', that sort of thing! but there's a little secret - he's the Neighborhood's secret weapon. he invented fantasy guns! four magic revolvers that, when the 'second safety' is turned off, multiply into a giant clusterfuck of guns (with ammo ranging from magic 'bullets' to essentially rocket launchers). unfortunately he can only use this setting once & for a limited time before the guns overload & have to be manually repaired. so he either uses them off of the first safety (i.e, they're 'normal'), or not at all. you know shit is Really hitting the fan when he joins a fight
and Wally! Wally Wally Wally... you may have noticed that i put his class 'wizard' in quotes. that's because he says he's a wizard, but he's not! he just says he's one due to the automatic stigma and fear of what he really is - a Warlock! his patron is Home, an eldritch horror that many would classify as a demon. they have a very special, codependent pact that neither of them can live without - Wally wears their 'seal' as a house-shaped pendant on a choker (necklace) hidden under his clothes. Home is extraordinarily powerful, but Wally barely taps into that power. he has a grimoire that Home inscribed with a bunch of sigils that convert into spells when drawn & then cast in the air. the only other powers he uses are seeing-in-the-dark, seeing-magic, and opening teleportation doors! Wally can't sleep, but he can doze - though he's never fully unaware of his surroundings (its kind of like how dolphins only sleep with one half of their brain). he still eats with his eyes, which both feeds him & acts as a form of providing daily energy to Home, since Home can't exactly consume souls every day. If Wally uses too much magic, he has to rest inside of Home's house-form, which is the only time he actually fully sleeps. no one knows about Home, or that Wally is lying about his wizard status.
Home is a lovecraftian being with three forms. the first is the lowest power level - a cute one-room house with Eyes! i.e: Home Classic! Wally's pendant unfolds into it, and it's the main way Wally and Home physically interact & communicate. the second is possession - if Wally explicitly allows it, Home can completely take over his body and kind of 'tuck him away' to have a nice deep nap while Home takes the reins (Home can technically force this, but it's very difficult and would not go over well w/ Wally - it would also be an unstable possession). the third is Home's true form - a massive shadowy eldritch monster made of writhing darkness and nightmares that no one in their right mind would look at, let alone fight. Home has very complicated feelings about Wally & the Neighborhood. they are also, quite literally, Wally's heart - which is part of their pact.
i have some scene ideas & little Plot Concepts (most notably the times the Neighborhood learns two Very Big Secrets about Wally, one of which being the warlock/Home reveal).
but yeah that's moooostly it. basic stuff yk, not very in depth! just fun things to feed my maladaptive daydreaming & escapism
#warlock-masquerading-as-a-wizard wally is fun#cause youve got this funny little guy! in his little wizard outfit and his staff and classic wizard eccentricities!#but he has a lovecraftian horror curled up in his chest excited for its next opportunity to consume souls#home when making wally's body: ah fuck how do people eat again??? with their eyes right??? that sounds right... thats how i eat...#home a week later: shitshitshit their MOUTHS they eat with this Mouths goddamn it.... too late to fix it now#cut to wally internally panicking while watching other people drink/eat normally#hm i Realized that like... half the Neighborhood more often than not doesn't outright fight#poppy hangs back. howdy hangs back. barnaby rarely joins. frank is often busy researching#and then you've got eddie & julie going full-tilt nonstop absolutely mowing down enemies like there's no tomorrow. sword besties <3#wally and Sally casting from the middle ground...#wh fantasy au#maybe the howdy enthusiast in me is jumping out lately but hes soooo good in this au i swear#he's out here bargaining over a potion with his own neighbor mid-battle#bc he Will be funny about it when the stakes aren't high#forcing them to go through transactions even though he'd give the goods to em anyway#him vibing with poppy & barnaby while explosions go off in the background#and then when shit hits the fan he gets to be a Certified Badass and whips out the big guns with the cockiest grin you've ever seen#hes fun. i love him.#they're all fun. i love them.#home & wally make me especially Ough in this au. their relationship is so messy and you literally cannot have one without the other
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there will be a livestream for gavin’s memorial, monday, december 2nd, 4pm EST.
#gavin creel#i don’t have much to say right now; the grief is hitting me over the head again in full force#but i hope a lot of people will be able to go! you can rsvp to!
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anyways. hamartia!dakota
#vixen rambles#i’m a self fulfilling prophecy. was worried that my obsession w pd was beginning to wane but now it’s hitting me at full force again. aough#hamartia tag
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knowing how to say hello and thank you in most languages is a good thing except when its stressful border control situations and people believe your abilities to understand them, im sorry heavily tattooed gelled up gay german man i only know vielen dank, bitte sehr, and wo kann ich rauchen, thats it!!!
#i made my dad get me a ticket back and then im sending it to Lufthansa so they foot the bill i aint waiting 48hrs for free rebookings#he called me while i was full force meltdown and i thought it was my brother so i answered crying hiccuping#and he went silent on the phone and then was like i see a flight available im booking it and youre getting on it youll help me refund it#one thing ive liked abt my abusive dad mellowing out after he hit 40 is that he values me showing emotions instead of autism glaring him#he even sees the value in me getting things he religiously doesnt agree w like tattoos cus 'you smile in front of me now'#anyways im glad he pulled through this one for me even if it means me returning excessive amount of money to him#atleast i get to be back home to my gf and cat soon and if i have energy i might stop by the trans march in toronto ill see
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no cause it genuinely JUST hit me how eddie literally looked like THIS when buck got hurt.
#im reading over my old(er) posts like a completely normal person and suddenly it hits me FULL FORCE for the actual first time that eddie#was genuinely this wrecked like honestly this means more to me than having him breakdown cause this fits perfectly w eddie's character and#how he copes and i just. idk im so tired but i need to talk abt this cause esp now that its been a few episodes and we saw eds happy again#the contrast to how he was while buck was in coma vs after is HUGE and it perfectly matches up w how buck was after eddie was shot#and that is insane and i dont know how to deal with it#eddie diaz#evan buckley#buddie#911 fox#911 spoilers#911 6b#buddie 911#buck x eddie
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i make fun of writer in the dark irl but in the shower after a breakup with taste and irony down the drain and all thats left is earnestness in anger and pain. that shit hits. anyways i wrote a poem
#u know when theres a pain so deep and immediate that u start reliving shallower pains to take the edge off? one of my cats is in the vet#again. right after oreo's death. for an unrelated reason. i truly cant deal with anything rn so im just vividly reliving every breakup#it's looking like tom hardy the cat will make it so i can talk about it now . unfortunately now that we're past the point of danger all the#pain has suddenly hit me full force. anyways. toxic yuri and revenge poetry u can never post ftw
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My brother is so funny cos he got all his tmbg knowledge from me second hand when I was obsessed with them and so he thinks the most random songs are like well known amongst the general public like he'll just name drop the most random esoteric forgotten compilation album tracks like it's nothing But he also still hasn't really listened to anything since glean and he doesnt really know much about them / their history etc besides what hes learned from me and he doesn't know like anything about like. What tmbg fans are like / what general fan opinion is because the only hardcore tmbg fan he has ever interacted with is literally me
#im trying SO HARD to get him to listen to the last few albums man cos its ridiculous#hes like i love nanobots one of the best albums but he still hasnt heard anything from i like fun or anything .and like#its just so funny like hes kind of a true head because of me hes like my#my numver 1 favorite track is exquisite dead guy. or truth in your words#like ok youre crazy . can you please just listen to phone power now#hes just soweird though#next time he visits im making him watch gigantic with me idgaf like#hes like theyre my favorite band but he just doesnt do favorite bands in the same crazy way i do so hes just normal about them#its funny because i feel like people either just know like the hits or theyre like Insaneeeee about tmbg but he knows lots of obscure stuff#and then is just normal about them.#and its like how . but i will be crazy enough for both of us#but he has way too much trivia because in highschool like we would take our dog for a walk and i would just fucki ng talk about#they might be giants for two full hours#but hes just like ok awesome .#he was like my favorite albums are john henry and factory showroom and im like its so funny cos those were the ones i was obsessed with as#teen and forced him to listen to with me a bunch like ❤️ Love .
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You hear about the one-hit wonder all the time, but you know what we need to discuss more? What I call "one-hit blunders". And no, I'm not talking about bad one-hit wonders.
I mean where the artist is actually really good, but not only did only one of their songs become popular, but it was the worst possible lone hit for them. Either the song just sucks, it's a really bad representation of the artist, or it's both.
Exhibit A: Tiny Tim
Oh my dude, Tiny Tim.
#music#one hit wonders#one hit blunders#tiny tim#tiny tim defense force#i've been a fan of tim for four years and his first album mostly holds up pretty well#but WOW does “tiptoe through the tulips” not hold up#even when i thought it was kinda cute in 2020 i kinda resented it for tanking his reputation today#like listen to any of his baritone songs and tell me if you see him as such a joke anymore#(specifically some good ones are “strawberry tea” “stay down here where you belong” and “what the world needs now” just to name a few)#heck i haven't heard this song in full but i heard a couple years ago there was this really touching obscure country song called “suitcase”#who made it? walker fucking hayes. yes the doofus behind that “fancy like applebees” song. i'm sorry if i brought back any awful memories.#proves the point though#for any swifites imagine if idk shit like “ready for it” or “endgame” was the only hit she ever had and her good songs were totally ignored#that's basically what happened with poor tiny tim
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Will I ever get over garp's scottish accent....
#i also think its kinda funny how they do a close up of zoro when they enter the baratie and its like he can sense sanji being there already#he can smell his pheromones....#nvm its because some people there seem to know him... like sanji knew him before he met him....#zoro sitting with the swords like that akdhaj that was funny#he literally has taken them off his waist before but some people looked at him funny and hes now on high alert#fullbody... your wig....#i cant with this sanji i need to stop every 30 seconds... it makes me retract from the screen#and he is SPANISH#mihawk has such a cunty voice akdhaj#and he is wearing cowboy boots....#zoro looking away when sanji gets the bill ajdhakshsksjsks he can't stand him!!!#zeff saying OIOIOIOIOI ajdjqjwk#why is nami spilling ajdhajshska girl....#also patty looks so good akdhskns#you know what i really appreciate zoro and nami moments my guy zoro cant talk with luffy about his grandpa but sees nami weird and#CANNOT leave it alone.... damn#also garps backstory must be really fucking devastating for me to even accept what he does like damn. not even related to opla just thinking#like forcing his son and grandsons into it and being SO HELLBENT ON IT YOU LET YOUR OTHER GRANDSON TO DIE#and still be kinda rogue from the marines like damn how does this work. not that that started before ace but....#imagine being zoro rn... half drunk just had an open feelings session with this girl you met a week ago and here comes your other#friend you met two days ago who is full on drunk and he brings fucking mihawk best swordsman in the world with him. imagine.#and now you have no option but to fight him and die. like that just hit him#also this being another instance of zoro protecting luffy akdhaksj. that is so good#but luffy washing plates and not breaking all of them is OOC!!!!!!!#nami trying to stop him bc they are bffs now..... yeah.....#netflix i hope this dynamic DOESN'T FUCKING DISAPPEAR. FIRST WARNING#look at this fake cynic. i saw you worrying about zoro before you made your bag to get out of there akdhaksjsk#how much time do you think mihawk stood there#he likes luffys hat.... GAY GAY HOMOSEXUAL#watching opla
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thinking abt how seren will playfully bust out "don't make me headbutt you" when their friends tease them
rekke is gently headbutted often, and he usually turns it into a brief tussle that leaves both of them grinning. he's the only one aside from vela they allow to grab their horns to wiggle their head around by
tekehu has been playfully headbutted a couple times, but usually relents with a laugh when seren ducks their head
eder has been full force headbutted. many times. he enjoys it, it's recreation for the two of them
#eder and seren sibling energy#[no reason] ''okay now hit me as hard as you can'' ''lmao hell yeah''#rekke was full force headbutted once and then every time since then will scramble away when they come at him at speed#bc he does not wear scale armor everywhere and though seren's horns are tiny they are Pointy and Hurt when caught in the stomach#some people look down on seren for their goat features + ''giving in'' to animal-like behaviors#but 99% of the time seren is firmly and confidently in the zone of#''why spend my time hating myself when i can embrace these features and be silly with them instead''#pillars of eternity#poe watcher#watcher seren#spoken from the stars#poe
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the fact that there are so many people posting about the fucking superbowl tonight and taylor fucking swift as if one of the most heinous and disgusting acts of genocide isnt happening Right Now. like i dont even have words for how the bombing of rafah makes me feel. and im not even directly affected by it
the entire western world should be forced to answer for the horror this three month long siege of palestine has been. this has been systematic and planned out. and leaders all around the fucking world have sat by and done nothing while an entire population, an entire ethnic group of human beings have been slowly wiped off the face of the earth.
theyre not gone yet. and they never will be. from the river to the sea
#free palestine#ive always kind of hated her#and her fans make me want to chew glass#but this is like. next level. how much i fucking despise taylor swift and swifties in general right now#for being such a massive force in distracting people from whats going on in palestine#there are varying reports of how many casualties have been reported so far. at least 60 by most accounts.#we wont know the full extent until morning#keep talking about it keep reminding people that palestinians are still here and still fighting#i recently rewatched jacob geller’s ‘art in the pre apocalypse’ video and it really kind of hits different with the current state of things
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#it feels like at this moment i'm mourning the loss of someone who left this earth 15 years ago#the realisation of the severety of the situation is dawning on me only just now#i was 13 when it happened and i didn't have anyone to talk to about it so i didn't get to mourn#time has finally caught up with me. the loss hitting me at full force#and realising he's the reason i took up photography and my urge to capture as many moments as i can#i feel absolutely wrecked at the moment. i can't stop the tears from falling and memories from reliving#i feel so sad for the child in me who had to push this all down to cope too. that's heartbreaking in and of itself#i hope i can catch a breath soon and go to sleep before i'm still awake to watch the sun rise
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