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notanactressyayy · 8 months ago

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—𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐚 𝐛𝐚𝐝 𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐚, 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐮𝐩—

pairing . Natasha Romanoff x fem! reader

summary . you both knew you would never be able to be together — so you had to take the shot, even if it would be the only and one time.

warnings . smut! I am not responsible for your content consumption! bottom! Natasha, soft sex, praise kink (?), cunninglingus, face riding, fingering, multiple orgasms, forbidden love, Red Room trope in general, non graphic violence, implied sexual harassment (Dreykov), cursing, angst.

notes . english is not my first language (🇧🇷) so I apologize for any spelling errors. feel free to leave any advice though!

disclaimer: they're both 18, before the graduation ceremony.

highschool sweethearts thing because I'm a simp for it. ^^

divider credits: @benkeibear

"Love is for children." they'd say, "love is a weakness." so how the hell did you manage? Natasha wondered, how did you kept the facade, even with all the things that happened between you, in secrecy from the rest of the widows — from Madam B, and from General Dreykov?

Because even her, one of their best widows, was starting to lose it.

Ever since the beggining, you were the most ruthless, emotionless, cruel widow they had. You couldn't remember your life before the Red Room, because it never existed. They took you from your parents when you were 2, and your training started by the age of 4.

You could swear you were born like that — cursed, without a heart. You never cared for anyone, for anything. Your only task was rob, torture, kill. Because the apple doensn't fall far away from the tree.

But somehow, that girl still managed to change you.

When Madam B put the redhead as your opponent, was when your whole perspective of life, of being, changed. God, you hated her. She had everything you ever wished to have — the longing for a family, the care for people, the gentleness. That showed whenever you went on a mission together — it wasn't a part of her characters, it was herself. When she spoke to you about Yelena and how she tried to protect her, when she took you to the dark warehouse to take care of your bruises.. especially when she insisted on covering your ears and mumbling a russian lullaby to muffle the sounds of the other girls screams in the night.

She taught you what love was. And that made you want to kill her. To kiss her. To tear her apart. To make her scream, and not from pain.

Dreykov always made it clear that romance, or even the slightest display of affection would result in severe punishment, or worse, execution. That was because he knew that the widows would never be able to find a partner outside his walls, so finding that need between each other was the only way out.

Yet, Natasha and you had an advantage point — you were the best of the best, the most talented widows. So first: he wouldn't suspect anything, and second: he couldn't kill his best agents. It would be his loss.

That's how she became your little secret. You were an hell of an expert, because you never let your feelings get in your job. Neither did Natasha, but it still shocked her.

It started with a simple peck on the lips by the age of 13, in the farris wheel of the amusement park you were undercover. Your cart was the one on the top, where you could see all the atractions from, and no one could see you. You tried to convince yourself it was just teenage curiosity, but it still led to that.

The hotel room of Belgium, Brussels.

You never knew the simple mission on breaking in a bank was gonna lead to that.

Natasha did everything in a rush, knowing that you could do it smoothly, but just to be able to spend a little more time with you. Like now.

You sighed deeply, leaning against the sink's counter and looking at your reflexion in the mirror. The cut on your forehead was stinging a little, but you decided not to pay attention. The redhead walked in the bathroom, just not expecting to see you only in a black lace bra and the black tights of the vest. You heard the click of the door, but showed little emotion. "Hey, Red."

"Oh, Y/n..." she whispered, her eyes searching for yours, wanting to know if you wanted her to leave. You gave her a shake of your head and a small smile. She walked through the door with a soft exhale. "I already settled the guns and all the weapons. I also wrote the reports, in case you're wondering."

"You spoil me too much," you smirked tiredly. "You do all of that just to have me a little more, don't you?"

Your joke made her look down a little. "Yes," she whispers.

"You do?" you raised an eyebrow, not expecting her to affirm. "Well.. we still have 5 hours before they retreat us, so.."

"Your forehead," Natasha cuts you off, frowning in concern, rushing to check on you. Her hands went to hold your shoulders as she studied the cut — she only realized your lips parted and your gaze at her when she felt the straps of the bra beneath her hands.

"It's fine," you whispered, clearing your throat. Natasha looked away for a brief second, before looking into your eyes again.

"It's not, let me patch you up—"

You shook your head, placing your hands on her waist and leaning in, shutting her up with a long, gentle kiss. You pulled away and met Natasha's dreamy gaze, her eyes a little disoriented.

"Y/n..." the redhead mumbled, her eyes fluttering close and her head dropping to your shoulder, as she sighed.

"God, the way you look out for me makes me so weak." you chuckled, your palm rubbing her back, fingernails grazing her skin. "You know you don't have to do that. I can take care of myself just fine."

"I don't care," she said, lifting her head again to get herself lost in your eyes once more.

The graduation ceremony was coming soon, and you couldn't care less about that — but with her, it was different. You both knew what the ceremony actually meant, and Natasha was scared. She didn't want her dignity off her. And not knowing how to deal with this, she just wanted to protect you, in a way to comfort herself, her heart.

"It's gonna be okay, Natalia," you smile, planting a little kiss on the tip of her nose. "It's not gonna be the first surgery they perform on us. Besides, I'm gonna be with you as soon as you're back on the dormitory, okay?"

"It's just," Natasha gulped, her arms wrapping around herself. She was thinking far, of the future. "Who's gonna want a woman who can't even do the basics? Who's gonna want a woman who can't give birth to a baby?"

"Me." you simply said, placing your hand on her cheek, Nat immediately leaning into the touch. "I will. Because when we're out, we're getting married." you giggled. "Wasn't that our promise 4 years ago, when we were 14?"

Natasha's eyes snapped back to you. It was clear she didn't want to think of that as a joke — she had to show you how much she felt for you. And she wanted- needed you to reciprocate her. So she completely forgot of all the damn rules. She grabbed the back of your neck, and unintentionally pushed you up against the wall, kissing you with urgency.

Your eyes widened in surprise, but fluttered close again as the shock vanished. Your hands went to hold her waist again, tightening as you felt her press herself against you.

"Nat..." you whispered against her lips, breaking the kiss. She looked at you, her lips grazing yours again, your noses brushing.

"It's our only chance," she whines. "We were pleasure toys for men since we were little, can't we have something real for once? Before everything falls apart?"

Your breathing hitches as she says that. You let your eyes close, guiding her backwards and outside the bathroom, towards the bed.

"It's forbidden, but who the fuck cares? Who knows if we're not getting killed someday, or if Dreykov send us to different bases and we never see each other again?"

"Natalia," you shake your head, shakily breathing. "Everything I've done, everything I did was for one reason — having you by my side."

Natasha whimpered, sitting you down on the bed and standing between your legs. "Y/n, I want to see you."

"Then do it." you replied with no hesitance. "you're the only one who I'd consent to, Natalia."

At this point, you swore you forgot everything else than how she slowly unattached the hostler from your hips, pulling the tights and panties down and breathing rapidly by the sight of you semi-naked in front of her. Before she could do anything else, you stood up, hand moving to zip down the tight suit they made you wear. Natasha whined, leaning herself into your hands.

"So impatient," you whispered, finishing with the zipper and removing the fabric of her body, taking your time to do so. She held your shoulders and let you slip it down her legs — along with her panties, which she wasn't expecting. Natasha gasped quietly as the air hit her core, making you smile softly and stand up again.

"Darling," you cooed, hands moving to her back as your face found shelter on her neck, gently nibbling and kissing there. "you're so pretty it hurts,"

"Y/n," the redhead almost moaned, tilting her head back to grant you more access. She felt the straps of her bra slide down her shoulders and bit her lip as her breasts were freed, the lack of the tight clothing giving both of you an immense relief. In a moment, your lace lingerie was gone too.

"You're so gorgeous..." you whispered in her ear, your fingers tracing all the scars on her body, which you were sure you already had memorized. "And you are mine."

"Yes," she nodded, wrapping her arms around your waist. The skin on skin contact from someone she actually trusted felt too good, too much. "Yes, yes I'm yours."

Natasha then gently sat you down again on the edge of the bed, taking your breath away as she kneeled down in front of you, her hands gently pushing your knees apart and holding them open like this.

"God," she whimpered, leaning her face to slowly press kisses on your inner thighs, your back arching a little with the contact.

You took a moment to look at her dreamily, your slender fingers going to tangle in her red hair and play with it softly. "Lyubovmoya, (my love,)"

Natasha swore she could cry now, from the intense emotions building up within her. She couldn't wait anymore. So she did just that — diving into you, her mouth finding your pussy, her tongue inside you, tasting you, savouring the sweetness reserved only for her.

"Fuck, malyshka, (baby,)" you moaned, the sensation of being filled by someone who wouldn't harm you almost sending you over the edge already. "Yes, just like that,"

Natasha whimpered softly, licking the juices that were already spilling out of you, her tongue moving in circular motions against your clit.

"Nat," your head tilted back, hips bucking against her face as your climax approached. "I'm coming, Nat, I—"

She moaned against your folds as you came, licking all of your arousal, her tongue fucking you through your orgasm. After a while, she pulled her head back and looked up at your face.

"You're so fucking beautiful between my legs like that." you murmured breathlessly, smiling in bliss. Natasha blushed, you could tell she really liked your praises. "Are you really ready for more?"

"This is such a bad idea," she lifted herself from between your legs and smiled weakly, straddling your thigh again and gently pushing your back against the bed. "But the best we'd ever have."

You giggled, crawling further back the bed and laying your head on the pillow, your hands pulling her on top of you. Natasha thought of everything but that.

"Y/n," she bit her lip, getting a little shy. "I don't wanna hurt you."

"Don't be a hypocrite." you smirked softly. It wasn't going to be the first time she had suffocated you with her thighs, one of her combat skills. "Let me taste you too."

Natasha carefully placed her hands on the headboard, lifting herself up and lowering her thighs around your head, so hesitant. You gently squeezed her flesh and pulled her flush against your face, making her gasp a little in surprise. In a second, she felt your tongue inside her. So that's how it felt.

"Oh my," she whimpered, closing her eyes tightly, as she slowly started to grind herself against you.

You moved your hands up her thighs, to her hip bone, running your fingers across the bullet scar she had there. There was no doubt that, of all the Red Room academy, Natasha was the one who most took the harshness from Dreykov — sometimes for punishment, for the so called reward for being a good widow, or even to protect you. So she deserved all the sweetness and care she could get, for once in her life.

"More.." she breathed, her eyes looking down at yours — not expecting you to be so skilled, looking closely at her as your mouth worked on her. Your eyes smiled at her, and she felt it.

"Such a good girl," you whisper, sending vibrations all over her body. You then inserted two fingers inside her, carefully laying her down on the bed and hovering your lips against hers. Not kissing her, yet. "As soon as we get out of here, I'll marry you. And I'll scream to the world that you're mine."

"Y/n," she cried, feeling a warm tear roll down her cheek — not knowing if it was the pleasure only, but also her emotions.

"I feel so lucky," you smiled, so softly, lips brushing against her cheek as you spoke. She giggled, her arms circling your neck. Natasha moaned as she felt your fingers brushing continuously against her g-spot, as if you knew her better than herself, and you did. "I would give the world to have you in my arms, and I have it, and I'll never let you go."

"Say that again." the redhead begged, bucking her hips against your hand.

"I'll never, ever let you go." you repeated, feeling her legs starting to shake. "Even if I have to die for that."

"If I die..." she whispered, and suddenly, a wave of arousal washed over her, and she threw her head back, her cum all over your fingers. You gently fucked her through her orgasm, and then licked your fingers.

Nat gripped your back, her fingers digging into your skin. You rolled over the bed and pulled her on top of you. She looked like a baby now, so innocent, so precious. She clinged to you, wanting more of your safety, of your love.

Yes, love. And it didn't matter if she was considered a child now.

"I-if I die," she continued, her voice so so small. Your fingers ran through her hair, through her red locks. "At least I had one good thing in my life. You. You're the only fucking good thing I ever had, Y/n. And I'll take you in my memories forever and ever."

"I love you, Natalia." you said with conviction. "I'll love you in my every reincarnation, in my every life."

That's when you heard a loud bang in the door. The tracker, the wire.

"Goodbye, princess." you held her tighter, as she buried her face on your neck.

"See you soon."

Everything went black. Two widows terminated. Two shots fired.

Dreykov would have to train two other girls to replace you, and it wouldn't be easy.

At least you were free now. And had to hope you'd be married with two kids and a picket fence for the next time.

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creedslove · 1 year ago

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WHO KNEW? 💍💔

No outbreak!Joel Miller x f!reader

"You took my hand, you showed me how

You promised me you'd be around (...)

I took your words and I believed in everything you said to me (...)

If someone said three years from now, you'd be long gone, I'd stand up and punch them out, 'cause they're all wrong

I know better, 'cause you said forever, and ever, who knew?"

Summary: You and Joel had been married for a few months when he broke things up with you because he'd fallen in love with someone else, Sarah's mom. You parted ways but more than a decade later you end up meeting Sarah and that leads you to face your ex-husband one more time

• Inspired by this amazing HEADCANON request ❤️

Warnings: angst, broken hearts, asshole!Joel, divorce, infidelity, pregnancy, fluff (a little, maybe?) age gap (Joel is four to five years older than reader and the time skip is 12 to 14 years (Sarah's age) but feel free to imagine whatever you want)

A/N: Hi guys!!! I got obsessed with this story ever since I received that ask and turned into a headcanon but it wasn't enough, I had to write a longer, fuller version of this story! I think it's so appealing because we are all used to Joel being our knight in shining armor, always the perfect husband/boyfriend and well, here we can see another part of him. It's not a crime to fall in love with someone else, but the way he broke reader's heart was very mean. Also, I didn't specify reader's profession, just keep in mind she studied A LOT and now she makes good money, but feel free to idealize her job the way you want. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this story, besties ❤️

10.6k words

You never really understood why some people told you getting married so young would be a mistake. It didn't make sense to you, at all. You and your soon-to-be husband Joel, were young, yes, but you loved each other deeply. You figured it didn't take much more than that to make a happy marriage.

You were fresh from highschool, always had good grades and it didn't take long for you to be accepted in many different institutions, and yet, you decided it would be a good idea to take a sabbatical year in order to get yourself sorted out, maybe get a job and save up some money and enjoy your marriage a little. Joel was very supportive of you, even if he knew you would eventually leave for college and you would both have to make it work long distance.

Joel was just a couple of years older, he'd just left the military and he also needed to know what to do in life, in order to support his wife, he didn't have the book smarts his girl did, but he was kind-hearted and hard-working. He also hadn't planned on getting married that young, but before he could even try to make any sense out of it, he was deeply in love with you.

So Joel proposed, you said yes, his dad helped him get a small, but cute house and the two of you started your new wed life.

For the first few months, everything was a bed of roses; you were so in love, that man was simply intoxicating. His touches, his kisses, his body, his smell, everything about him was addictive to you and you couldn't be without it.

You had found yourself a part time job as a sales clerk at a baby clothes store at the mall, just as Joel was working as an apprentice in the construction business, it was a very hard job, and just in a matter of a couple of months, you saw your boyfriend becoming bigger and more muscular. He worked hard for you, for your relationship, your marriage and the future family you would build in a couple of years. Even if your friends had told you it was madness getting married so young and your family had asked you not to do it, everything was just fine, what could go wrong?

Every single day, Joel would come back home, tired from work, and he would be welcomed by you in your fullest housewife version. Dinner all ready, house spotless clean and a loving wife dying to be in his arms. He would not disappoint you, taking you into his arms, lifting you up, pressing you against the wall, his kisses were so urgent, so needy of you, his hands roamed all over your body as you felt his cock throbbing. Every night next to your handsome husband Joel was a delight, it was your personal piece of heaven, nothing could stop the two of you when you were together, but eventually, it happened.

You didn't know exactly how it started, or when for that matter, it was all a thick fog in your mind, being unable to say precisely when your marriage began falling apart. Perhaps it happened sooner than you thought but you were just too naive or too blind to see; first thing you noticed, were the kisses; they were gone. No kissing before going to work in the morning but you shrugged it off, thinking that maybe Joel was just in a rush to get to work. Though you really missed them, your skin seemed to burn and ache for his touch, you didn't want to seem like a clingy wife, or nag him with unimportant things. Whenever he came back from work, he was still all yours; that's why it took you long enough to notice it.

Every evening, he came back with the same hunger he felt, only this time, he didn't seem to have felt that hunger for you per se, more like a desire within that needed to have you to help him relieve it.

He took you every single night, he gave you pleasure, simple, raw, indifferent pleasure. You didn't actually remember the last time you actually made love, because everytime Joel touched you, he always had you on your hands and knees for him, always fucking you on your back. At the time you thought it was just some kink or something like that, but now it was pretty clear to you it was just the easiest way for Joel to close his eyes and pretend you were someone else.

It was just simply fucking, a means to get to an end.

Then, he began getting home later and later, sometimes he would be too late for dinner, or he would just skip it entirely. Never explaining exactly what he was doing or why he was spending less and less time at home.

"Sorry babe, just had a sandwich with the guys"

That's what he would say before shrugging and going straight to the bedroom; not taking his time to actually see you'd cooked his favorite or that you were starving because you'd waited for him until that hour. The weekends weren't different at all, at first, right after you two got married, you'd spend the entire day in bed, just enjoying each other's company, each other's bodies and love; caresses full of affection carried with lust, turned into nothing more than just a memory some months later. Every weekend Joel simply got up, had breakfast and told you he was heading for work; and he would spend the entire day there, no phone calls to let you know he wouldn't be back for lunch nor calls to tell you he would grab a few drinks with the guys.

Always the guys, and as much as you tried to convince yourself it was indeed just one drink, or a burger, or a soccer match with the guys, your heart was sending you signals, trying to warn you there was something seriously wrong. Yet, you chose not to believe it, you told yourself it was actually kind of cruel of you to have such thoughts about your poor hard-working husband. What kind of wife would you be if you became paranoid while Joel was just working hard to provide you a good life?!

Joel was so busy with his work he barely even noticed when you asked for a double shift on Saturdays. Not that you liked working at the mall, but if you were going to stay alone all the time, you figured you would at least earn some money. Maybe Joel was just stressed about having to put up with the bills all by himself, you reminded yourself. Perhaps things would be back at what they were in the beginning, you were now marking six months of marriage and you knew this wasn't supposed to be happening. Your husband wasn't supposed to be that uninterested in you, he wasn't supposed to be indifferent towards your presence or so ungrateful, and yet you decided to fight for his love, after all, you loved him more than anything, more than anyone, it was an overwhelming feeling but you simply couldn't move on from it.

You waited for Joel another night, you'd made dinner, but of course he said he wasn't very hungry because he had grabbed a bite to eat with the guys.

Your heart clenched, he didn't kiss you, nor held you, it was like you were two different people sharing the same house; not lovers, not husband and wife, perhaps not even friends anymore. It felt each time more and more empty next to Joel, but you tried. You sat down and had dinner on your own, as he glued himself to the TV, watching whatever it was on. You knew him enough to know his mind was drifting away, thinking of something or someone, you weren't sure, the only thing you were a hundred percent sure was that he did everything at his willpower so he wouldn't have to spend time with you. It hurt, like a knife piercing through your chest, it was humiliating and you still didn't know why you were insisting. You swallowed after dinner and walked to the couch, he was nearly asleep and you ran your hands through his hair, feeling how soft his curls were; you had missed dearly times like that, it had been only a few months prior and yet, it felt like an eternity. The way your Joel would come to you, crave your touch, and just overall pay attention to you, unlike the haunting reality that you had to face, in which your husband simply began to ignore you, as if you weren't much more than a shadow, or an invisible and yet quite annoying presence. You looked down at his sleepy and peaceful form, he always looked so young and innocent when he slept it always warmed your heart.

The tip of your fingers ran through his scalp once more, he had always loved that particular display of affection. Minutes passed while you stroked his hair, you could feel Joel shifting softly under your touch, satisfied groans coming out like purrs as he began to slowly open his eyes

"Angela.." he murmured under his breath, but it was loud enough for you to catch it.

At that moment you felt as if you'd lost all balance, gripping the couch and staring at him in disbelief

"Who's Angela?" Your voice suddenly loud and serious, making Joel snap away from the sleeping haze he was in and stare into your eyes. He was carefully not to give it away immediately

"What are you talking about?" He got up from the couch, determined to turn his back to you

"You said a name. Angela, who's she?"

"I don't know what you're talking about, Y/N, stop being crazy"

Your blood boiled at the accusation.

For months all you did was try to be the perfect housewife, you cooked, cleaned, worked and brought home the little money you made in order to win back your husband's attention, not only that, you didn't want to have to give away to everyone who told you you would be making a mistake by marrying so young. It had been so difficult to actually admit to yourself your marriage was at a risk, and now you just had enough proof. After months of indifference, your husband was now mumbling another woman's name; as if it wasn't bad enough, he was trying to make the tables turn by accusing you of being crazy. That was so typical of men, but not of your Joel, you thought he would never do that, you were so sure he was honest, honorable, a decent human being, he wouldn't hurt you on purpose in order to prove his point. Or so you thought.

"Don't you fucking dare call me crazy, Joel Miller, for the past couple of months you haven't given a shit about me, you're never home, you never spend time with me, you don't hug me, don't kiss me, you don't even fuck me anymore, and now you are mumbling someone else's name? Who's she? Is she your mistress? How long have you been with her?"

Again, you tried being strong, you really did, but your voice cracked, and the tears threatening to escape now ran freely down your cheeks, he'd walked away from you, but you managed to corner him in the kitchen, you were tired of being blinded by your own feelings, at the same time you were tired of being played by Joel, he had no right to act that way.

"Answer me, Joel!!! Who's the fucking whore?!" You yelled at him, the impatience and anxiety creating an explosive combination inside of you. You were so close to solving the mystery that haunted you at the same time you didn't wanna hear any further word. You just wished you could close your eyes and make all that away, you wish you could just wake up and see the last couple of months were nothing but a nightmare and that you still had the same good old loving Joel Miller as the best husband in the world; instead, he simply groaned, rubbing his face and looked down, not having the courage of look at you in the eyes.

"She's not a whore, don't call her that. I-We.. we're in love. I met her at work, she's the receptionist there and we hit it off… she's gorgeous, funny and I fell for her" he swallowed not sure where the strength to be honest with you about his feelings was coming from, but it was enough to make eye contact "I've never cheated on you, Y/N, I haven't slept with her yet, I haven't even kissed her, but I think she's the one, I wanna be with her, I'm not gonna lie to you anymore"

"You don't love me anymore?" That was all you could ask, out of all the cruel and raw information he suddenly threw on you, the only thing you could register was the lack of feelings from the man who swore to love you forever one day.

"Jesus, Y/N, let's not do this now" he groaned, wanting to shift all that anger towards you, somehow blaming you for what happened so he wouldn't be consumed by his own guilt. He wasn't blind, he knew you loved him, he knew you waited at the door for him every single day, with dinner ready a pie in the oven and giving you those sad, heart eyes in hopes of receiving his affection once more. You reminded him of a puppy, as bad as it sounded, all it took you to be happy was a crumble of his love. What angered Joel was that you weren't satisfied with just crumbles, you wanted more and more from him, and he was unavailable; he simply couldn't give it to you, because his heart belonged to someone else. He hadn't planned on that happening, if it were up to him, he would've honored the vows he took on his wedding day, but Angela walked into his life without a warning and swept him off his feet. He couldn't stay with you out of pity, you deserved to be happy and so did you, but you weren't meant to be together.

"Do you love me or not, Joel?! Did you even love me?" Another grunt from his lips, you were so frustrated you didn't know how to rationalize, how to wrap your head around the fact he proposed to you, he had promised you the world and yet now he was treating you as if you had never mattered to him. His cowardice made you sick, he wasn't even man enough to look you in the eyes, you felt so angry a part of you was glad his body blocked your access to the silverware set because if you got your hands into it you knew at that moment you were willing to make a mistake. You gripped his shirt, slapping his chest and scratching him in a sloppy way, demanding answers from him. He could stop you at any moment, Joel was bigger and stronger than you, but he let you have your moment of hurting him out of pity, before calming gripping your arms and pushing you away

"I guess it's obvious I don't love you anymore, I love Angela, it's not my fault, it just happened, but I'm sure I want to be with her, you and I can't keep lying to ourselves, you can't keep lying to yourself, we're over, just as the love I felt from you, it's over…"

•••

You didn't remember much more after that. Some flashes of the following days, where the initial shock was still going strong, the waves of sadness mixed with anger, how Joel gathered some of his clothes and left the house that same night - probably to go to Angela's, how you refused to eat for the couple of days, you didn't talk to anyone, just spent your time alternating between crying yourself to sleep and actually sleeping, were just moments of blur. At some point you remember Tommy - Joel's brother checking up on you just to make sure you were alright. Tommy was the youngest of the Miller brothers, he was said to be the inconsequential one, but he would never do what his older brother had done.

Only after a few days Joel stopped by the house you once had shared, he had heard from his brother the pitiful mess you'd become because of him, and though a part of him didn't have the courage to ever face you again, another part - a more honorable one - insisted on it because he had to give you some kind of explanation. So after work, he didn't drive to Angela's like he'd been doing for the last few days, becoming his sweet routine and bringing so much joy now that he was free to love her just as much as she wanted to love him. Instead of going to his happy place, Joel drove back to the house that used to be his home for a while, a place where he'd been happy but it hadn't been enough for him. It was funny how he expected things to be drastically different, because his life had taken a dramatic turn just as yours had, and yet, things were just the same, or they appeared to be at least. He got off his truck, seeing that not a lot had changed, but this time there wasn't music coming from the house, it didn't smell like fresh cooked dinner, simply the living room with the lights on were the only thing that showed there was still someone in the house.

When he walked in, he expected to see you crying, depressed and begging him to get back, but much to his surprise, all your bags were already nearly packed and though it was visible you'd had some rough time by dark circles under your eyes and how pale your skin was, you welcomed him with a emotionless expression on your face, pointing at the couch, so he would take a seat and you could talk things through. After all the crying and suffering, you felt as if something had clicked and suddenly you went from heartbroken to numb. You knew the swirl of feelings would come and go, but taking advantage of your numbness, you put your head into place as best as you could and packed all your things, you didn't want to stay at that place surrounded by Joel memories, knowing he'd left the place you once called home and you were both so happy and also so unhappy in a short span of time. You wanted to put yourself back together, heal from him, forget he ever existed, go back to studying and focus on yourself only. But for that to happen, you wanted closure, not only wanting, you needed closure.

His low apologies combined with the rambling that came out of Joel's mouth was getting on your nerves, why couldn't he man up and actually tell you what he needed to in order to finally close that chapter in your lives.

"If you're not getting straight to the point, I will, Joel… I packed my bags, I am leaving this house, it's yours, your family managed to help you with it and I wouldn't feel comfortable living here. I'll go to college as soon as the next semester starts and I'll be waiting for the divorce papers, sign it as soon as possible, and pretend this never happened"

"Wait… what?! You want to divorce?!" Joel was quite shocked, not that he didn't want to divorce, because he did, so he could finally be officially with Angela, but he didn't think it would be that easy for you to agree, let alone be the one suggesting it.

You laughed. It was a dry, ironic laughter, because honestly, you didn't think Joel was that much of a dick, it was fascinating how he broke your heart and he still found a way to have his ego bruised by the fact you wouldn't accept being in a submission position, that you wouldn't cry and beg for him.

"What did you expect Joel?! That I would stay here, legally married to you, cooking and washing your dirty underwear while you go out of the door and keep cheating on me with that whore? Seriously? That's how low you think of me?"

"I already told you she isn't a whore and I have never cheated on you, that's why I want to divorce, us getting married was clearly a mistake and it's not my fault if I don't love you anymore.."

"So whose fault is it? Mine?! Do you really think what you did isn't cheating, Joel? Just because you hadn't fucked her while we were still together, but you had spent time with her, emotionally connected with her, fuck, just the fact you let her get closer to you even though you were married, that's cheating! You say it isn't because you don't want to feel guilty, but deep down inside you just know it is! I agree with you on one thing, though: our marriage was a stupid mistake, because of you I delayed a whole year of my life, I almost sacrificed my future because I really took your words and believed them, that we would be together, I never thought out of all the people in the world, you would be the one to hurt me! I trusted you, do you even know how many times I cried and sulked because I blamed myself for your behavior? The amount of times I felt guilty for even remotely considering the possibility of you having someone else? Because in my mind you'd always been the perfect husband and yet, you were backstabbing me day after day, with that slut!"

"Don't you fucking call her a slut! She's not a slut, she's not a whore! It's not her fault if you are a petty envious woman!"

"She is a slut Joel, I'm sure of it, because if she had any decency she wouldn't have come closer to a married man, my husband! She is probably excited about the thrill, but I'm certain that once the reality hits and she sees herself locked inside having to carry out chores everyday, take care of the house, the husband and even the kids if you two ever come to it, it's not gonna be as fun, and then you'll meet her for real. I don't wish you anything bad, but god help you if you ever have to face a disappointment as big as mine"

You dried your tears and began removing your wedding ring, it was quite pricey taking into account how complicated your financial situation was. You intended to return it to him, but the mere thought of maybe Joel taking the ring and handing it to his former mistress and soon-to-be official girlfriend, was enough to make you nauseated. You gave up removing it and left the ring right there.

"I'm leaving this place tomorrow, you can send the divorce papers over to my parents' and I hope I'll never see you again, Joel"

•••

You wished you could say that was the last time you ever saw Joel Miller in your life, but unfortunately, things weren't too easy for you. Only two months before you could finally enter college and forget about the disastrous year you had, you were working double shifts at the mall, in hopes of saving a decent amount of money for yourself. It was supposed to be another lazy evening, in which you would have to kill time until you could go home, you had just had your break and as you walked back into the store, you couldn't help but pay attention to your left hand. The wedding ring still there. It brought you shame and embarrassment, the mere fact you left it there. You often lied to people and to yourself by saying it was a way of keeping disrespectful customers away, but the truth was, you just didn't know why it was so hard to do it. It felt like a weight you couldn't get rid of, a part of your life that seemed like nothing but delusion.

You were scared of removing that ring, it was a sign that Joel wouldn't be much more than a memory to you, and even if you knew that was exactly what you needed, your heart still yearned for him. It wasn't fair, to still love the person who had hurt you the most, burying deep those feelings but also knowing they were there was nerve wracking.

You were ready to get back to work, just about to enter the store you were so used to spending your whole day when you felt paralyzed.

"What do you think of this one, darling? Do you think our baby will like it?"

It was Joel's voice.

His voice.

Darling.

Our baby.

You stopped yourself right there, too far away from their distracted eyes, taking in all the colorful and beautiful options they had before them, but also close enough so you could actually hear the conversation. Joel Miller was going to be a dad, it was a fact, you weren't having a nightmare that you were about to wake up in cold sweat at any minute, instead, he was there, with her, the woman he dumped you for, the woman who was now carrying his child. Under the shelves you'd been hiding, you could only catch a glimpse of her baby bump, and the way Joel's hand rested over it in a protective way. It was enough to make your stomach upset, your eyes burning with the tears that once more insisted on appearing. He had moved on from you, much faster than you had moved on from him; their happiness could be beautiful to anyone, but to you it was disgusting, infuriating, they had no right to come to your place of work and be so glad about life itself.

You couldn't actually see Angela's face, all you were able to watch from where you stood was Joel's hand on her womb, his right one, but the moment he rested his left one on her waist, you gasped softly. The wedding ring was gone.

Joel wasn't feeling that comfortable about being at that particular store, though it was the only decent baby clothing store at the mall, he knew you worked there or at least used to; but Angela wanted new baby stuff and he was going to be a dad, so it was his duty to take her and help her sort things out. He thought of you, not having seen you or listened to your voice in months he sort of missed you? He couldn't lie to himself, he was glad to be divorced, he was happy in a relationship with a baby on the way, but you'd been important to him too, he wished things didn't have to end the way they did, he has gotten used to living with you, seeing you, kissing you, touching you, it was natural that he missed the dynamics you two had established. A part of him sort of wanted to run into you at the store, he wanted to see how you were doing, if you were taking good care of yourself, but it was a relief to everyone you weren't there. It would be just awkward and embarrassing to be baby clothes shopping in front of you. And of course, he never wanted to hurt you more than he had already done it, but you would have probably interpreted it as provocation.

He scratched down his head while Angela picked all her favorites, Joel tried hard not to pay attention to the price tags, money was still a delicate matter for the two of them, but he had managed to get some by selling his wedding ring. Of course the pair would've been worth a lot more, but he couldn't go after you to ask for your ring, so he just negotiated his own and took the money. It wasn't the ideal situation, but in a few months they'd welcome the tiny little person that would become the most important thing in Joel's life.

You were too hurt to continue watching their display of happiness, you turned your back to the place you were hiding and you returned to the small break room. That was indeed the last time you'd seen Joel Miller; that was it until you also met someone who brought chaos but also colors into your life.

•••

"Aren't you too old to sell cookies door to door for school?" Joel asked while chewing his scrambled eggs and slurped his coffee, watching as his daughter rolled her eyes at him

"Aren't you too old not to eat your vegetables?" She snapped back at him in their usual morning routine.

Sarah was a teenager, much to Joel's sadness, as he still had serious attachments to when she was younger. He knew it was part of life, and watching her blossoming into a beautiful young girl made him proud and hopeful about the future, he knew his sweet Sarah would go far. But that also made him scared, because no matter how irrational it was, Sarah always reminded him of you; and he knew that if any guy ever dared to do to his baby girl, what he did to you, he would be really to kill him in no time. Joel Miller would like to think he had improved a lot as a human being, after all, he wasn't a young man anymore, he was a full grown adult, who had to get himself together and mature after he was abandoned by his girlfriend with a newborn baby. Life was full of irony and he was one to witness it, being left by the woman he loved and trusted a little more than a year after he was the one who walked away from someone who loved and trusted him. It was what everyone said: karma is really a bitch.

Through the years, Joel really felt an urge to call you, perhaps ask you to meet him, so you could catch up and he could finally apologize to you, but he had lost all contact with you. In fact he had no idea what you were up to through the decades, the few times your parents ran into him on the street or at the grocery store and made sure to ignore his presence and pretend they'd never met. He just couldn't approach them and ask for your phone number. Besides, what would he even tell you?

"Hey, I just wanted to tell you the woman I left you for also left me, so now I'm a lonely single dad and I realized I took you for granted and maybe if you ain't busy, we could go for a cup of coffee or something?!"

It would be just straight up stupid, not to mention he was sure you would've found someone nice, someone worthy of you, probably you'd be married by then, perhaps you'd have a kid or two, and he was sure you'd be an amazing mother, because he just knew you were an amazing wife, and he was the only one to blame for not treating you the way you deserved it.

So Joel decided it was best if he pretended nothing ever happened just like you did with him, of course destiny had other plans.

He gave Sarah a ride to school and went to work. It would be another busy day, like all of his days, in which he would work hard in order to save as much money as he could, wanting to assure his daughter the future she deserved. For Sarah, it meant another day of classes and selling cookies. She didn't like the activity, but she didn't hate it either. In fact, on that particular day she felt kind of excited as she was about to head towards the 'good' part of the neighborhood, where most houses were big and seemed expensive. Getting her backpack and her stash of goodies to sell, she left home and went on with her day.

You, on the other hand, hadn't planned on coming back to Austin so soon, as the years turned into a decade, and then a little bit more than that, you had dedicated yourself fully to your academic and professional life, focusing on yourself only, managing to bury deep your memories of Joel and never paying attention to anything remotely close to a love life.

Yes, you'd had relationships, affairs, and you'd been with a few guys: one of them was Javier, he was a handsome but very slutty cop who you had a no-string relationship with; it was good for a while, he was handsome, sexy and he fucked like no other, but he had a taste for women that unabled himself to keep it inside of his pants. You liked the freedom, but that was too much.

You also dated a guy named Dave for a brief period, he was nice, also painfully handsome, a tiny bit mysterious about his high profile government job, but he wanted a family, not just another relationship. He wanted marriage and kids, and you were just out of it in no time. The last straw was when you were traveling back home and during one stop for dinner at a small, cozy bar, a guy dressed entirely in cowboy attire came onto you. It was the undeniable proof you weren't made for relationships at all; it was like Joel Miller had casted a spell, or worse, a curse on you: it had become impossible for you to be in a relationship. Still, that wasn't your main concern, not more than why you had to move back to Austin after all those years shifting from New York to Boston, Texas and even a brief period in Spain which led you into an affair with another guy named Javier, but well, that was definitely another story. You'd simply got a phone call from your parents talking about a family emergency and once you had asked for a leave, your boss had mentioned the opportunity of you working for the Austin branch, it was a promising one, with a lot of chances of career growth and becoming the head of the office would actually come in handy, so you had no other option than say yes and pack your stuff. When you got back to Texas, despite the suffocating heat, you were also welcomed with suffocating news of your grandmother's passing, and a couple of weeks later, the news she'd left you a house in the suburbs, a real good area with many families, easy traffic and a lot of space. Having become an apartment person over the years, you first thought it was so odd to live in a house, especially by yourself. Everything seemed so big but now you didn't have to worry about having to clean it all, being able to afford someone to do so, you found your way by decorating everything exactly the way you liked it, using the spare rooms to build your home office, your closet space and a guest room, you slowly turned grandma's house into your own. However, the exterior still bothered you: there was a great space in the backyard, but the swimming pool was empty and dirty, and you could definitely have a barbecue area built so you could welcome your friends and family on weekends. As it wasn't your priority, you didn't bother so much about it, turning your attention to settling into your new office first.

•••

"Oh, hi ma'am, I'm selling cookies to help our school fund, would you be interested?" Sarah displayed a wide grin, hoping that would soften up the very annoyed looking old woman who opened the door. She noticed how the old lady looked at her up and down and just groaned a 'no' before practically slamming the door shut. Sarah sighed and shook her head, and there she was thinking the people who lived in the wealthier part of the neighborhood were more generous, but apparently they were just a bunch of snobbish cunts. Her stomach growled in hunger as she walked some more, she knew she should've eaten before going to sell the cookies, but she didn't have time at that moment. She insisted some more, knocking on another door, having no clue she was actually knocking on her father's ex-wife's door.

Sighing tiredly as you closed your laptop, you looked around and focused on what you would do next. You knew you needed to go grocery shopping soon, but you just didn't feel like driving to the store and pick up vegetables, so instead, you left your study and went to the living room, getting comfortable on the couch and groaning slightly the moment the doorbell rang. You were just so comfortable on the couch, you considered ignoring whoever was on the other side of the door, but for some reason, a slight wave of guilt made its presence and you obliged to answer whoever was disturbing you.

"Hello! My name's Sarah Miller and we're selling cookies for the school fund, would you be interested?" The smiley girl repeated her memorized speech the moment you open the door, she discreetly watched you, seeing you didn't seem so closed like the woman from the previous house, but still she wasn't sure if you were friendly, not when you stared at her with a seemingly shocked look.

Miller.

Her name was Miller.

Your heart raced and lost track of what she was saying, knowing you desperately needed to get your shit back together; Miller wasn't an uncommon name at all, quite the opposite, you had met a few people who also coincidentally had the same last name as your ex-husband, so your reaction to the girl's name was just absurd. Maybe it was because you were back in Austin, where everything happened, but then again, you reminded yourself Joel wasn't the only person named Miller in Texas.

"I-I'm sorry… I got distracted but yeah, I'll take two boxes" you smiled at the girl, she was a teenager, a very pretty one, she was pretty good at expressing herself though she looked exhausted and sweaty.

"Would you like to drink some water?" You offered her, feeling sorry for her at the realization she had probably been walking under the sunlight for quite some time. Sarah didn't think twice before nodding eagerly as she stepped inside, dragging her school bag and her cookie cart along. You let her in, finding sweet how she looked all over the place, taking in the different details from your home and enjoying that environment.

You guided her to the kitchen, getting her a tall glass of iced water, frowning at the fact she wasn't following you anymore. Instead, she stood in front of your bookshelf, looking at it up and down, trying to take in as many titles as she could. Sarah would love to have her own bookshelf like that, she loved reading ever since she was a little girl and though she used the school's library a lot, she thought the idea of having her own things was appealing, but she understood her dad couldn't simply splurge on books for her whenever she wanted to.

"Do you like books?" You asked her, walking closer and handing her the glass of water, which she killed with only a few gulps.

"Have you read all of them?!" Her surprised voice made you chuckle, she was such a sweet girl, you had no idea why you instantly liked her, but you did.

"Well, not all of them… I've just bought some of them and I haven't had the time yet, why? Did any of them interest you?"

"Well…" she said shyly and hesitantly ran her fingers through them, only pulling one out to read the description at your encouraging nod. "This one seems nice…"

"It is nice… do you want it? You can take it!" You smiled at how she blinked a little confused but nodded, so thankful for your kindness. Even if she didn't know you, Sarah already liked you. She smiled at the book and placed the glass down.

"Have you had lunch?" She shook her head shyly and you smiled "come on, I'll make you a sandwich…"

For the next hour, you and Sarah talked about several things: she told you about her school, her interests and how much she loved reading. She had assured you she would return you the book as soon as she finished it and you assured her she could borrow as many as she would like. She also briefly talked about her family, mentioning she lived with her dad on the other side of the neighborhood and you told her a little bit more about yourself.

She widened her eyes the moment she saw what time it really was, and quickly grabbed her backpack and the book you'd lent her, thank you several times as she walked towards the door "go before your mom gets worried about you" you told her without much thinking, but she shrugged "mom's not around… I live with my dad only, but it was really nice meeting you, Y/N"

•••

And for the next month, at least once a week you'd get a visit from Sarah. It had become a habit of hers to just stop by, spend a couple of hours with you, return you the book she'd borrowed the week before and get a new one. She didn't talk much about her family, it was mostly about school, friends and boy crushes and books. You were kind of suspicious she was missing a feminine figure, since she briefly told you her mom left a couple of months after she was born without looking back, you picked up the hint she wasn't open to talk about it yet, and you respected it. You were glad you unexpectedly got a new friend, a very young friend, and at first you thought it was kind of odd, until you realized she sort of resembled a daughter figure to you. After all, if you had had children with Joel, your child would be around Sarah's age.

Joel also thought it was kind of weird his daughter made an adult friend, he was well aware of how dangerous things were in the world, especially for young, innocent girls like Sarah, but when she told him her new friend was a woman, single, childless woman, who was nice, definitely had some money but also seemed quite lonely, he assumed she was one of those old cat lady kind of women; in his mind, his daughter's mysterious friend was probably a widow, who didn't have any kids and now had to approach random people for attention so she wouldn't be alone all the time. If only he knew how wrong he was, he would've asked your name, but he didn't. And he also knew he should've done it, perhaps even asked for your phone number so he could call you in case of god forbid, an emergency. But he worked so hard, not only that, he was going through a very stressful period too, so he didn't pay as much attention as he should have towards several things.

Sarah had become acquainted with several aspects of your life, from the time you spent together in your weird version of a book club. Mostly the conversations were about her and the struggles she often faced as a teenager, but sometimes you let out information, plans or complaints here and there. It wasn't different the day you were very displeased with how your backyard was looking; it had potential to be a beautiful place but it needed fixing and remodeling. Perhaps it'd been the stress at work, but for whatever reason the way that place looked was bothering you and making you cranky, if any other given day you wouldn't give a crap about it, but at that moment you did, and not only that, you mentioned it to Sarah, who tried to be useful and told you she could ask her dad to take a look at it, after all, he was in the business and could help you with it. You said yes and told her you'd be expecting the two of them on Saturday morning. Only when the girl had left happily carrying another book in hands, was that you realized that maybe, and just maybe, you should've asked her father's name.

•••

"So, you're really sure this friend of yours wants to get some stuff remodeled? And that she can afford it?" Joel glanced at Sarah before focusing again on the street as he drove to her new friend's house. He wasn't truly convinced you would actually want to hire his services, it just seemed too good to be true. He held back a smile at the way Sarah rolled her eyes at him, she'd told him hundreds of times that yes, you needed someone to repair and remodel the backyard, if anything, he could at least indicate you someone who could provide the service you were looking for.

"Fine, let's help the old lady then" he grunted at the same time his daughter turned to him "what old lady?!"

"Your friend… isn't she old? I mean, she's lonely and she lets you hang out… I thought she'd be like our neighbor an-"

"Dad, she's younger than you, I think! And she's pretty too…"

At that information Joel was more curious about you. Why was a pretty young woman all alone and willing to be friends with a girl who could roughly be her kid's age?! Were you really pretty? And did you really want your backyard remodeled or was Sarah playing matchmaker? He really hoped she wasn't, otherwise he would be very angry. Joel didn't need a new relationship, he didn't want to, having failed the two major ones he had in his life, the first one being so immature and cruel to his sweet young wife and the second one he didn't exactly where he screwed up, perhaps he had just been naive and thought the woman who wanted nothing more than just some fun was actually willing to build a life with, or maybe he wanted her to take over your place, after all, you'd set the bar pretty high for Angela when it came on being a dedicated housewife. The raw fact was that Joel was alone all those years later, his first wife was hopefully living her best years with someone who truly deserved her and Angela was God knows where but he didn't give a single fuck. She'd been dead to him from the moment she walked out of his door, denying her own baby, and all that passion he felt turned into hurt and anger. Unlike the feelings he had for you: as the years passed and he grew older, he thought of several times he could've treated you better than he did, he thought of how he would have tried not hurting you as much as he did, even if the situation the two of you were was tricky, he often fantasized about a version of your marriage where he hadn't ruined everything, where he had been honest without being cruel, without playing with your feelings, he didn't know if it was just his conscious weighing heavily on him or what, but he always thought of you with affection and love. At that time he was sure he didn't love you anymore, the passion he felt for the other woman was too intense, too much, it blinded and deafened him from everything around, everything that mattered the most to him at the time. But all those years later, Joel was sure the love for you was still there, perhaps it was just hidden away, or it got stuck under all that shit that went on, still, he didn't know who you had become, what you looked like or where you were at that moment, so it was a fairly assumption he was still in love with a memory and nothing more than that.

"Fine, so what's her name after all?" He questioned his daughter after some moment of silence but before she could answer, Joel parked his truck in front of your home.

You heard the engine and you went to the window, checking the unknown car parked in front of your place and though you couldn't actually see them inside, you knew it was Sarah and her dad. Just as you went to the door, he exited the car, his back to the entrance as you walked to them and greeted Sarah, at the sound of your voice he immediately turned around and the two of you froze in time as you watched each other there.

Joel.

You felt as if you were trapped in a weird dream, the ones you know you are just dreaming and yet you can't move or speak, just taking the role of the audience of a bizarre picture that formed before your eyes. Joel on the other hand, stared at you in complete silence, you couldn't really read him, it was impossible to know what was going on in his mind, in his heart, you could just feel his eyes roaming over your body, taking all the image of you as if he was trying to make sure you were actually what he saw in front of him. He couldn't believe it, after all those years, after everything he did to you, you were there, beautiful as you'd always been, even more so, the fancy lifestyle really suited you, he could tell by your clothes, your nails perfectly done, your hair looking gorgeous and styled nicely, you had succeeded, you had had a life he knew he could never provide you, and for that he felt kind of relieved, at least one good thing came out of your divorce: the chance of you having the success you deserved it, you weren't that housewife who needed to still work part time at the mall, you were above that now, and Joel was so damn proud of you for it.

"I-I.. yo-"

"Nice to meet you, you must be Sarah's dad" you interrupted him before he could say your name and extended your hand to him, pretending you'd just met. He was confused but you tilted your head very discreetly towards his daughter, being sure she didn't know anything that had happened between the both of you. He immediately picked up the hint and introduced himself, as if you were meeting for the first time. His hand engulfed yours like it always did, Joel Miller had always had big and strong hands, surely they got calloused through the years, but you knew damn well what they were capable of doing to you. He was older, looking more handsome than you thought he would, he aged like a fine wine, streaks of silver here and there but the majority of his hair still dark and soft like always, he was bigger too, he was stronger, broad and grew several muscles, all of it a result of years of hard-working. No matter if he had broken your heart, there was no denying he was an extremely attractive man.

He appreciated how heartfelt you were towards his daughter and gladly followed you inside once you invited him into the backyard to discuss what could be done. Sarah was right behind the two of you, but you turned to her, smiling big

"I went to the bookstore yesterday and I think you might enjoy what I bought, wanna take a look at it? They're all in the living room" you suggested to her who nodded and happily went after the books.

Once you and Joel got into the backyard, he stuttered some apologies but you immediately cut him off.

"I don't want apologies Joel, I didn't know Sarah was your daughter and I probably wouldn't have let her in if I knew who she was, but now I got attached to her and I hope our situation isn't going to prevent us from being friends" you told him honestly and watched as he nodded

"You know, her mom, Angela, she left us and I'm very sorry I left you for her.. "

"I don't wanna hear it, Joel. As I said, I don't wanna hear it about her mom or the apologies or anything at all, I mean, Sarah told me what happened and it's enough, you and I aren't together anymore, we're better off without each other, so let's just overcome this part and focus on the job I need you to do…"

"You know, I can indicate you another contractor to do it for you, so it won't be weird…"

"No, you can do it, unless you are feeling uncomfortable but other than that, I'd rather you do it, besides, Sarah would find it awkward"

And like that, Joel got into his professional mood and the two of you discussed the project you had in mind, hiring his services, he told you he could start the next Monday and he would take care of it himself, to make sure things would go according to your wishes. He noticed you didn't wear any commitment rings, nor there were pictures of you and any guy indicating a relationship and in his heart, the hope of perhaps taking you out for a coffee and getting to know you, the woman you'd become after those years, after growing mature and changing your life completely, growing in his heart. It was a fair assumption Joel had an immediate crush on you, the feelings he held within, were now blossoming more, at how beautiful, intelligent and attractive you were and suddenly, the roles were reversed: if more than ten years ago you had it bad for him, now he was the one who felt like a sick love puppy towards you.

The first week of working wasn't so bad at all, Joel would arrive at yours earlier than you expected and would start working. You didn't stay around much, letting him do his job while you were probably working in the living room or any other part of the house whenever you didn't have to go to work per se. He tried making small talk during some of his breaks and since you didn't see any harm in it, you chatted briefly, that was how he'd learned what you did for a living, where you'd been after you left Austin, and stuff like that. He told you some things about his life, mostly about how it'd been the experience of raising a child on his own, but whenever he got near bringing up your past or trying to apologize, you'd cut up any kind of interaction with him. At the end of the day you and him had nothing but a professional relationship. He understood your reasons, and yet, he hoped you would find at least a small breach in your heart to let him in, he really hoped he could show you he was a better man now, that he could be suitable for you, and yet, you kept yourself all the way distant and protecting yourself from him.

So it became a very common scene to always escape from Joel, moving seats or rooms whenever he was around, you didn't know how else to act, what he expected from you. It wasn't like you were old buddies catching up after years in a long-distance relationship. And he always got displeased.

It was about the third week of working at your house, he asked if he could use your kitchen to have lunch, heating up the food he'd eat, you smiled at yourself as you were taken back by the memories of times where you would prepare him lunches and send it in his lunchbox, how you would worry about him being hungry so you would always make sure there was something fresh out of the oven for him to nibble on as soon as he got home from work and chuckled softly, shaking your head and excusing yourself. He'd thought you would at least have lunch next to him, but you weren't willing to do that at all, and that both pained and pissed him off.

"Would it kill you to spend time with me? Look at me? Or act like a human being instead of being all stiff like a robot whenever I'm around?" He asked, breaking the silence, you could see he was frustrated and that puzzled you to no end.

"What are you talking about, Joel?!"

"You don't talk to me, Y/N, I try making small talk, you don't answer me, you don't even look at me, suddenly I'm not worth your time? You're too good to even acknowledge I am next to you?"

"Do you really want to talk about not being worth someone's time? Really Joel? I thought you had grown up during all these years but I can see you are just the same shallow fuckboy who gets pissed off when you see I'm not crawling towards you…"

"Stop being unfair to me! All I'm trying to do is to show you I've changed, I am a better man, a better person, I'm not that same immature Joel you met so many years ago, I'm trying to make you see I'm a new man…" he went from angry to desperate, you took a step closer and looked into his eyes, not breaking the eye contact for one second.

"I know Joel, I know you've changed… you've grown into this hardworking man, this amazing father, I can see it, I hear it every time Sarah comes over, but you don't have to try too hard, it's not gonna change anything… You and I are two different people, we have nothing to do with each other anymore"

"You can't say that, I want you to see we could try it again, I still love you, Y/N!"

"Joel, we'll never try it again, the marks of your betrayal still linger here, all over me, forgetting you was the hardest thing I've ever done, and I don't want to ever feel it again. You don't love me, Joel. You love the idea of me, of picking up the shattered parts of your broken life and making it right, you love the thought of building up a family, of giving your daughter the mom she deserves, and it's all because it didn't work out with that woman. We both know it… if she hadn't left you wouldn't even be thinking of me" you looked down, trying to hold back a tear that insisted on falling, but failing at that matter. "I wasn't good enough to be by your side, to build a family with you, you can't just expect me to throw myself into your arms as if nothing had happened, what exactly do you think would happen between us in the first place? I'd be waiting for you every single night with dinner ready? Those days were over, Joel…" you sniffed and he sighed, placing his hand on his waist.

"Give me a chance, go on a date with me, please… before you say no, just think about it, of what we could have together… please! You don't have to answer me now, think about it and when I finish the job, you can tell me your answer"

•••

The following weeks were as normal as they could be; you hadn't told Joel yes but you hadn't told him no either and even if it pained you to admit it, you sometimes thought of his proposition. Sarah was still coming over, your bond was now stronger, you really liked each other and despite everything that happened, you were thankful Joel wasn't against your friendship. You two had agreed on not telling her anything about your shared past at the moment, but in case you two decided she needed to know it for whatever reason, Joel would be the one to tell her, it would only make sense. You also thought about his words and you decided to be nicer to him, actually stopping to talk to him, or having lunch next to him instead of rushing away as fast as you could and in retribution, he stopped with the feelings talk. The deadline was coming to an end, as your backyard remodeling was getting prettier and prettier each passing day. It was odd and awkward and you wanted to get things over with as soon as possible at the same time a strange fascination with watching Joel caught you. It was hard to explain, but when the final day came, when Joel and his assistant showed you the word ready and done, and after you paid them the large wage you owed them for the services, your ex-husband asked to talk to you. He had hope in his eyes, he was wearing his flannel, and he'd combed his hair a little, which made him look painfully handsome, your heart clenched. Even before he could say anything, you already had your answer. He stood in front of you, baffled at the fact you threw your arms around his body, pulling him for a hug. His hands locked around your waist, strong grip not wanting to let go, while you sank into his warmth. He was your old Joel, the one you'd loved so deeply and broke your heart, but nonetheless your Joel.

Taking your hand to his face, you stroked it gently, feeling his beard scratching your palm a little and you smiled "I forgive you, Joel… I don't know if you wanted my forgiveness or not, but I forgive you anyway, I don't resent you anymore, what's gone, it's gone and now we can only focus on our future. I know that if I tried looking for a space in my heart, I would find it a part that still keeps all the love I felt for you, but we've changed, for the best and that teaches us we should never make the same mistakes from the past, so you do understand why we can't go on this date, right? We can't be together, I'm sorry Joel, but you know it's true… I just need one last thing from you…"

You told him, leaning towards him and pecking his lips. After all that time, it still felt like your favorite place in the world, your heart raced the moment he groaned into your mouth and his hands tightened his dominating grip on you. It was quite pathetic how he still had the same effect over you and if he hadn't hurt you as much as he did and condemned you two to a relationship based on lack of trust, perhaps you could even consider trying again. Forgiving and forgetting were different things, whereas you didn't resent him anymore, you hadn't forgotten about how broken he left your heart. You would never be able to trust him again, always worrying he had found someone better like he did once, you couldn't do that to yourself, you loved yourself too much to go back to Joel Miller. That last kiss you cherished, you would keep it in your memories, but it wouldn't go further than that. You and Joel were done for years and nothing would convince you otherwise.

____

A/N: I hope you enjoyed it 😭💔

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal x you #pedro pascal x y/n #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal fanfic #pedro pascal imagine #joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller x y/n #joel miller fanfic #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller imagine #joel miller tlou #tlou show #tlou fanfiction

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wave2tyun · 5 months ago

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gold rush | ☆

pairing: yeonjun x reader

genre: highschool!au, band member!yeonjun, friends to lovers, fluff, slight angst

prompts: “make me”

“mine”

warnings: none!

word count: 2k

a/n: gold rush anon i don't know if you are still around but if you see this by chance i miss you, and this repost goes out to you<33 ily!!!!😔😔✊💞💞

☆ = repost from my old blog!!

• credit to @/kilibae_0913 on twitter for the yeonjun pic!!

“earth to y/n” yeonjun waved his hand in front of your face “are you even listening to me right now?”

“no- yeah” you blurted out “fuck- sorry, can you repeat that again?”

you and yeonjun were sitting in the school’s cafeteria at your usual spot. as much as you loved talking with him, the history test you took earlier had you completely zoning out. you were too stressed wondering whether you actually wrote the correct answers or whether you messed up all the events again.

“ah- cute” he chuckled, putting his arm around your shoulder. this had always been a regular occurrence: a quick compliment muttered underneath his breath, followed by some sort of physical touch. to him- it was probably just normal behavior, he had a pretty charming and flirty persona after all. but to you? the moment those playful remarks leave his mouth, you can feel your cheeks flushing red in anticipation of his next actions. and you hated it- you hated how you had little to no control over how your body would react to his touch or his words, how your feelings are left in plain sight.

“so-“ yeonjun resumed the conversation “i was asking whether you-” he pointed a finger to your face “-are coming to the music festival tonight. our band is playing- the principal signed us up” a proud smile took over his face.

you bit the inside of your cheek. the music festival? it didn’t exactly sound like a great idea. ever since yeonjun’s band had started gaining popularity, people were all over him. it was bad enough that you had to handle this at school: shushed whispers as others saw him talking to you, girls giggling whenever they passed by him in the hallways. everybody wanted him- everybody wondered what it would be like to be loved and adored by choi yeonjun, including you. but you never had the guts to tell him anything. if continuing to be in his presence meant that you were only supposed to remain his friend, then you were content with that.

the music festival would only make you wallow yourself in even more self-pity. people from all over the town were going to attend it, not just students and teachers from your school, and you weren’t sure whether you could handle seeing everybody’s heart eyes upon seeing yeonjun. however, you couldn’t just choose not to go. you had to set your own feelings aside and put his first.

sensing your hesitation, yeonjun cleared his throat before speaking again “you know i’m not taking ‘no’ as an answer- you have to be there, you’re my good luck charm”

“i know, dummy” you sighed “of course i’ll be there” you playfully flicked his forehead, making sure to put on your best smile so that he wouldn’t feel your lingering worries. yeonjun returned the favour, lightly flicking your forehead back, only to rub the spot with his thumb right after, attempting to soothe your pain.

“thank you, i knew i could count on you” he whispered.

・・・・・・・・・・・・・・

“looking for yeonjun?” beomgyu (yeonjun’s bandmate) asked you. you were standing near the backstage entrance. yeonjun had asked you to meet him in their waiting room, but you were unsure whether you were even allowed past this door. you didn’t exactly have valid proof to show the guards that someone wanted you in there.

“yeah, i texted him to come pick me up but he still hasn’t read my messages” you rubbed the nape of your neck.

“that fool- he’s too busy nervously pacing around the room to check his phone. i’ll help you get in- come on” beomgyu offered.

you thanked him, relieved that you didn’t have to put your ‘sneaking in’ skills to the test. you didn’t have much faith in them, cause 2 out of 3 times you’ve done that before you got caught. seeing beomgyu by your side, the guards didn’t question anything, and you made it in safely.

beomgyu knocked on the door only after entering “you’ve got visitors” he said, then turned on his heel, ready to return to what he was previously doing. yeonjun got up from the couch, the frown on his face gone upon seeing you “you’re here” he smiled, opening his arms wide to capture you in his embrace, swinging your body from side to side

“if someone had checked their phone- i could have arrived here even earlier” you complained. you had to think of some way to repay beomgyu after this.

“i’m so sorry about that” yeonjun broke the hug “but i’ve got a good excuse for it” he walked to the couch to rummage through his bag. “and that is?” you questioned him, quirking up an eyebrow.

“i was busy getting you this” yeonjun put a lanyard through your head. it was a vip badge “now you get to enjoy the show from the first row- and i get to look at you from the stage”

there it went again- that rose blush that loved to take over your cheeks. how could he say that so casually? so nonchalantly? you couldn’t help but wonder whether there was truly no meaning behind his actions “thank you, jun” you played with the badge in your hands “are you nervous?”

yeonjun stretched his neck, then his arms, humming “not really, now that i’ve seen you- definitely not” you pushed his shoulders, laughing together at his cheesy words.

“good luck then. i should get going, you probably need to carry on with the preparations” you said.

“see you after the show?” he asked.

“yeah, see you” you repeated, twisting the doorknob to take your leave.

the venue was starting to get pretty crowded, although it was still quite early. you had your own spot secured, thanks to yeonjun’s little trick. not knowing many others from around you, you scrolled through your phone until the lights dimmed down, the quiet murmurs being replaced by loud cheers. the host’s voice erupted loudly from the speakers: “coming in hot from woolim high school to kick off our night- tomorrow x together”

people’s screams were getting increasingly louder as the five boys got on stage, almost making your ears bleed. you were seriously debating whether you should have brought earplugs with you or not. yeonjun took his place at the mic stand in the center, electric guitar hanging from his shoulders.

“is everybody ready for tonight?” yeonjun asked the crowd, his question being met with an overwhelming enthusiasm from the crowd “let’s get this started then- taehyun, drop the beat” he shouted.

you couldn’t help but smile as you watched him perform, yeonjun was exactly in his element. nobody there could deny it, the place where he belonged to be was the stage. even song after song, his energy didn’t seem to drop, not one single bit, the venue almost burning from his passion.

his hair fell into place like dominos, body glistening under the golden spotlight. god- what must it be like to grow up that beautiful? that question continued to run through your mind with each passing moment, and it didn’t seem like you were the only one experiencing that. you looked around, noticing how everybody’s eyes were glued on yeonjun, screaming, fawning over him, begging him to take their phones and film like he did to others. they desperately wanted to gain, in some sort of way, his attention. you didn’t exactly understand the feeling that was beginning to take over you. you couldn’t even pin-point it. jealousy? disappointment? the realisation that in a room full of people that wanted him, there would be slim chances that he’d pick you, was beginning to settle in.

everything was starting to get all too overwhelming, in a way, suffocating. you couldn’t bear to stay in there, even though txt’s setlist was close to ending. pushing through the crowd, you struggled to get out of the massive swarm of people. you somehow managed to get outside, breathing in the night’s crisp air slowly.

‘fuck’

you left your bag in the band’s waiting room. you glanced over at your watch, praying that you had enough time to get in and out of there without bumping into yeonjun. you didn’t know how long it would take him to notice you missing.

luckily, that same guard that you saw with beomgyu was still standing at the backstage entrance. knowing that you were a familiar face, and noticing your badge as well, he allowed you to walk past after explaining your situation. you also slipped in a little lie, saying that you were feeling unwell and had to go back home quickly, just to make sure that he wouldn’t get in your way.

your eyes frantically scanned the room, searching for the small black bag that you had brought along with you. it was placed neatly on the coat hanger. you reached out to take it, your body freezing on the spot after hearing the door open. yeonjun abruptly entered the room. he placed his hands on his knees, panting as he was struggling to breathe properly. it seemed like he ran to get there right after the last performance “are you leaving?” he asked, chest heaving “why? are you okay- did something happen?”

you put your hand down, your gaze shifting from his face to the floor. you gulped- you got caught. you knew that you were supposed to face him again, one way or another, but you weren’t prepared to do it tonight, not when your head was such a big mess "i can't be around you" you admitted. every single part of your body didn’t want to be there, in that situation. your words received a frown from yeonjun. he was confused, he didn’t know why you were saying that all of a sudden "why?" he probed on further, coming closer to you. "you know why” your voice trailed off, eyes searching everywhere except for his own “you just fail to accept it. recognize it"

“then do it” yeonjun took another step closer “help me understand so i can accept it” he wrapped your hand in both of his, bringing it close to his chest. you looked at the way he was holding on to you, stopping you from simply running away from him. you shook your head, trying to swallow the heavy lump that was forming in your throat. you couldn’t find the strength to explain your feelings out loud. “why?” he repeated once more, still not satisfied with your answers “i want you to do it. if you want me to accept it- make me” yeonjun spoke softly, thumb rubbing the back of your hand “why won’t you let your heart control your actions for once instead of your mind?”

his words kept ringing in your mind, each time winning a little bit more over the thoughts that had been relentlessly holding you back. you blinked away the tears forming in your eyes, slowly retracting your hand away from yeonjun’s, his smile starting to fade. “please don’t hate me after this” you whispered, placing your hands on his shoulders as you rose to the tips of your feet, capturing his lips in a short peck. yeonjun’s lips lingered, barely 1 cm away from yours, curving up into a smile. his hands found their way on your waist, holding you close to him “i’ve always wanted to do this with you” he chuckled, dipping his head down for more. his kiss was tentative and slow. it felt tender, yet full of passion, like he was pouring all of his bottled up feelings through this delicate touch “mine” he whispered in between “i want to call you mine”

this time, his words didn’t make heat rise only to your cheeks. instead, you felt warmth spread throughout your whole body. your hands cupped his cheeks and you reached out for another kiss “i’m all yours” you muttered against his lips. you rested your forehead against his, the close proximity not letting your palpitating heart calm down, not even for one bit. but you enjoyed it, you loved the way it felt to have his body close to you, to finally have him truly own your heart, and you owning his.

the door opened briefly, then got slammed shut just one second after, startling both you and yeonjun “i told you he’d kiss her” beomgyu shouted at his members.

taglist: @huekalover3000 @maybabe00 @sunoooism @boba-beom @ujisworld

#wave2tyun #txt #txt fluff #txt x reader #txt fic #txt imagines #txt smau #txt scenarios #txt headcanons #txt yeonjun #yeonjun fluff #yeonjun scenarios #yeonjun fic #yeonjun x reader #yeonjun imagines #yeonjun headcanons

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dixons-sunshine · 5 months ago

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Pull Through | Daryl Dixon x Fem!Reader

Summary: While you were injured with no way of knowing if you'd make it or not, Daryl let the group in on his feelings. He shares some of his memories with you, as well as some of his worries.

Genre: Angst.

Era: Prison, post season three, pre season four.

Part of the Shopping Spree, Hangout Dreams AU, but can be read as a standalone. However, some call backs are made to previous parts in this.

Warnings: Mentions of injuries.

Word count: 1.2k.

A/n: I've had this idea in my mind for another part to the Shopping Spree, Hangout Dreams AU for a while now, but I just don't know how to put it into a proper fic. This is more of a filler than an actual fic, but anyways. Hope you like this!

“Ya know, Shane wasn't the first person to tell me tha' I dun' deserve her.”

Rick looked up from his daughter to look at the archer, Daryl holding his own five month old baby girl in his arms. Rick's heart broke at the sight of his found brother's clear distress evident on his face. He was staring off at nothing in particular, thankfully lucid enough to keep Hazel in place on his lap. It was clear that your recent injury had taken its toll on Daryl, and Rick knew that if you didn't wake up from your little coma, Daryl would be a mess; he would be a bigger mess than Rick was when he lost Lori.

“My whole life, even 'fore I grew the balls to confess to her, people were tellin' me tha' I dun' deserve her, tha' I ain't good 'nough fer her, tha' she'll see it herself and leave me.” Daryl stopped for a moment, his attention temporarily being diverted to his daughter who was starting to fuss a little. He whispered sweet nothings to her in the hopes of calming her down, slightly bouncing his leg and successfully coaxing a giggle from her. “But she never left. Even when things weren't all sunshines and rainbows, she stayed. She loved me regardless of all of my flaws, and god knows I have a shit ton of 'em. She ain't ever even thought 'bout walkin' outta the door, even when she could'a, and I wouldn't have blamed her.”

By now, a few people in the group has stopped to listen to the usually quiet archer. Beth, Maggie, Glenn, Sasha, Tyreese, Hershel, Michonne, Carl and Carol stopped to listen to him. It was extremely rare to hear Daryl talk about anything outside of the usual “formal” work talk—who would go on runs, who'd work on the fence, etc.—so everyone was intrigued to hear the brooding huntsman speak his mind.

“She deserved so much better than me, and I know tha', but she didn't think so. She stuck with me through everythin'. Through most'a my childhood, through highschool, through Merle and his bullshit, everythin'.” Daryl inhaled sharply and let out a shaky exhale, trying to keep his emotions under control. “She always managed to make the most outta everythin'. When I saw a glass tha' was half empty, she saw a glass tha' was half full. Ya know, our first apartment we lived in after movin' outta her mom's trailer was so shitty.”

“Yeah?” Rick replied, just letting Daryl know that he was listening.

“Yeah,” Daryl confirmed with a broken chuckle, nodding his head and allowing Hazel to play with his fingers. “Hot water didn't work most'a the time, the oven only worked when it wanted to, the pipes made this weird screeching sound whenever it was cold, and the window to our bedroom was jammed shut. It never opened, so it was hella hot in the summer.” He sighed again and shook his head. “We lived in tha' crappy place fer years 'fore either of us had 'nough money to move into a better place. But she never complained, never threatened to leave me if I didn't find a better apartment, never once blamed me when she had to take a cold shower in the winter. Hell, she even planned on proposin' to me 'cause I was takin' too long.” For added emphasis, he lifted his left hand to show off the silver band he proudly wore every day of his life since that day in your apartment. “I beat her to it, though. She's jus' so amazin'. I love her. I can't lose her. I'll die without her.” And with that last sentence, a sob finally broke out of the archer's chest.

Within seconds, Rick had gently grabbed Hazel from Daryl's arms and passed her over to Carol—who had been on her way to offer her own support to the huntsman—before wrapping his arms around his unofficial brother. Judith had been passed over to Beth during Daryl's speech to be put down for the night, so it made it easier for the former sheriff to jump up and hug Daryl. The archer never once displayed any forms of sadness in front of the group that had to do with crying. His sadness was usually handled through anger, but this wasn't a usual situation. You—the love of his life and the mother of his baby girl—were clinging on for dear life in your weakened state. The attackers that ambushed the group of people who went on the run the previous day made you suffer the worst of the attack. Hershel did his best with the supplies he had, but there was no telling if you'd recover until you woke up, if you ever woke up. And that scared Daryl beyond belief.

Rick didn't hold Daryl long, maybe two minutes at most, until he pulled away. Daryl furiously wiped at the tears in his eyes, mad at himself for displaying such weakness in front of everybody. However, nobody made any sort of comment towards him, their own understanding and worry towards you preventing them from doing so.

“If there's one thing I know,” Rick began, standing up and allowing Daryl to have some space. “It's that you Dixons are fucking stubborn. She'll pull through, I know it.”

Daryl sniffed and nodded, wiping his eyes one more time before getting up and gently taking his daughter from Carol. “She needs to be put to bed soon. She, uh, needs to see her mama 'fore it, though, jus' in case...”

Just in case you didn't make it.

Rick nodded sympathetically, and with that, Daryl walked away from everyone's empathetic gazes. He walked up the stairs and made his way to the makeshift medical cell, expecting to see you asleep, like you had been for over twenty-four hours at that point. However, he was instead met with the sight of you sat up and crouched over to the side, heaving and clutching at your chest, awake and alert, and he didn't hesitate to call for help.

“Hershel!”

Within seconds, the old man had hobbled himself over to the cell and was by your side in an instant. He was helping you put an oxygen mask over your mouth to help you breath, and once you weren't struggling to breathe anymore, he sent a frightened looking Daryl a reassuring smile. He beckoned him closer, and with Hazel still in his arms, he walked over to you and sat down on the bed, hugging you gently and quickly before pulling back—there would be time to crush you to him and never let you go when you weren't sat with a recently shot stomach and a few broken ribs. Hershel patted his back reassuringly, and he sent a very awake, lucid you a warm smile.

“Welcome back.” He turned to Daryl and nodded. “She pulled through.”

“S'a good sign, righ'?”

For the first time in twenty four hours, Hershel gave the archer good news. “It's a damn good sign.”

You were grunting and reaching out to Daryl, and your husband instantly knew what you were requesting. With a nod from Hershel, Daryl slowly transfered Hazel into your arms, and your little one instantly recognized her mama's touch. Her mood instantly brightened, right alongside her father's.

You were okay. However, the same definitely wouldn't be said for the son of a bitch held prisoner as soon as Daryl was done with him later—he was going to pay for hurting you, and Daryl wasn't going to go easy on him, either.

©dixons-sunshine 2024. I do not give permission for my works to be copied, modified, adapted or translated to any other site or platform without evidence of my given consent.

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theholypeanut · 1 year ago

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♪ You Belong with Me ♪

Characters: Bachira Meguru, Isagi Yoichi, Kunigami Rensuke

Cw: stalking, fake dating or is it?, fluff and a tiny lil angst, mention of Barou not getting bitches (pov he goes to the same school as Isagi) , mention of Otoya being a horny perv (Otoya slander as always love u Eita)

Plot: Being a football star is not an easy task, being popular can really get on your nerves when someone goes too far. That’s why he asks you to pretend to be his girlfriend to make all of this unwanted attention to go away highschool au, fake dating trope, afab!reader, ~800 words each

Bachira Meguru

Bachira was never very popular with girls, so when he started getting anonymous love letters, he was excited. Someone is crushing on him? However, as time passed, it seemed like this person was more obsessed than in love - writing about how cute Megu looks under the shower (how do they know?) and thirsty messages about how amazing he smells - it got very uncomfortable, especially when you don’t know who is sending you all of this. So he asked you if you could pretend to be his partner, just so the stalker would leave him alone.

Fake dating Bachira was actually a lot of fun. Since you were close friends, so you essentially did the same things, except his hand was wandering on your back a lot, around your waist, in your hair. He started to call you Bumblebee in front of others, making you blush with his affectionate behaviour. To be clear, he was clingy before, but now Bachira Meguru was just a menace. However, it didn’t take you long to get used to wearing his sweatshirt when it was cold, and holding hands around his teammates “because you’ll never know if the stalker is seeing or not, so we have to be like this all the time”. But as time went on Bachira started to be more bold. At first, he kissed your hand occasionally while you walked home, and eventually, he moved on to kissing your forehead goodbye. He didn’t care if it was around people or not anymore. You couldn’t control the butterflies in your stomach every time you felt his lips on your skin.

Obviously the creepy stalker sent some nasty stuff to Bachira about being heartbroken, however after two weeks you got a familiar envelope in your shoe shelf. Scared that it might be some threat, you opened the letter with shaky hands.

“Take care of him well. I can see how much he loves you”

It caught you off guard, but without a second to think about it, you felt familiar hands around your waist. “Good morning baby” Bachira’s face was right next to your ear as he planted little kiss on your cheek. And just as you looked at him you thought: god, I really don’t want this to end.

He saw the envelope in your hands and got angry at the spot. “I really hope they don’t even try to mess with my-” you shook your head and showed him the letter. “It’s good. You are good” You stopped for a second with a sad look on your face. “I guess if it worked we don’t have to-” the bell starting classes stopped you from ending the sentence. But Bachira knew what you wanted to say and he hated it.

You spent morning classes thinking about Meguru way more than usual. The silence on his part was frightening you, because what if for him it was really just an act? What if he doesn’t mind to come back to things as they were?

On the lunch break you felt your phone vibrating.

Megu: Can we talk? Come behind the gym

Without answering you just stood up and went feeling anxiety taking over your body. When you arrived and saw a familiar silhouette, your heart skipped a bit. Meguru came closer and pushed you gently against the wall and put his forehead on the crook of your neck. Feeling his breathe so close to your skin make you shiver.

“You are right, you don’t have to pretend anymore” he said, and your throat got dry as you felt like tearing up any moment.

“But if we stop pretending, and do it for real, does that mean I can kiss your lips too?”

Isagi Yoichi

Isagi was your best friend since childhood, the best neighbour, an amazing companion to play board games with. And of course, you were always the loudest fan cheering on all of his matches.

Isagi got very popular when he became one of the best players in his high school and girls and boys finally saw the side of him you saw all along: a very athletic, nice and cute boy. And a very, very handsome one.

At first it flattered him that so many girls came to see him play; however, the louder they screamed, and they squeaked every time he looked in their direction, the more annoying it was to him and distracted him from the game. “Isagi, control your fun club” he heard from angry Barou.

But to be fair, he had no idea what he could do with this issue. He was simply too kind to snap at them, and too shy to stand up to them either.

“Maybe they’ll stop if you date someone?” Bachira mentioned in the locker room after practice. Then he whispered right to Yoichi’s ear: “You have someone who you want to date for some time already, right, Isagi?”

Isagi blushed. Of course there is only one person he would even consider to date: you. But how could he ask you to date him because of something so stupid? He couldn’t do that for years now, so how will he grow a pair now?

“Maybe just get a fake girlfriend” he heard Aiku speaking. “If you are such a virgin you can’t actually get one.”

So obviously, when he asked you, if you could pretend to be his partner to get rid of unwanted attention, how could you say no?

And that’s how you two ended in this situation: holding hands with your childhood friend while going back home together. His hands were so warm, and big, and for the entire route you felt hyper aware of his presence.

“So… how was the practice?” You asked to fill the silence. Normally you’d talk for hours and joke all the way home, but apparently Isagi is also not used to holding hands.

“It was very good… I think the fan club might get more and more discouraged” Yoichi barely could make a full sentence, that’s how much he focused on the way your hand felt. If he knew he could hold your hand everyday, he would ask you to pretend to be his girlfriend years ago.

Pretend. Yeah.

However is it still pretending if you are doing that on your way home with no one around?

“So… what are your plans for the weekend?” He asked trying to get himself together. His team didn’t have to play any matches this week, which was a rare occurrence. And gave him some time for himself.

“Well, I don’t have any particular plans” you started holding his hand tighter. He blushed. “I was thinking maybe I’d study some, watch a movie… on my own”

Oh?

“Do you maybe…” he started while looking away, so you won’t notice his embarrassment. “Want to watch it together? Or… or study together?”

You looked on the ground. Isagi started to regret his boldness - what if you don’t actually like him this way? What if you are actually embarrassed to hold hands with him and it makes you uncomfortable, and you only let it happen because you are a good friend? With growing silence he started overthinking everything and started taking his hand back, just to not make you feel more uncomfortable.

But you held it tighter and raised your brow.

“And what do you think you are doing, huh?”

“I’m sorry, that was very stupid” he started. “I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable, you are already spending so much time with me because of this whole situation, just tell me and I’ll stop bothering you so much”

For a football star he was really insecure, but what could he say? He crumbled under the idea that you might be annoyed with his touch or by his presence. Even if he’d have to keep his feelings for you forever, he’ll do it if that mean he gets to keep you as his friend.

“Yoichi” you started quietly. “You don’t make me uncomfortable. You could never bother me, you know? I actually…” you felt the feelings stuck in your throat. “Missed you a lot, since you are so busy with your football career. I missed spending time with you. Just us”

Isagi felt adrenaline was rushing through his veins just like before he was about to shoot a goal. This was an occasion he was waiting for so long.

“Do you maybe want to go on a date together?” He said without hesitation. You blinked a little surprised.

“You mean like, a fake date?”

“No. A real date. Just us. We can go to cinema, or maybe for a picnic, or we can just study together too…” he held your hand so tightly his fingers turned white. You smiled.

“Yeah, I’d love that”

Kunigami Rensuke

Saying that you and Kunigami were very good friends would be an overstatement. You were a manager of his football team for a year now, and you had a massive crush on him, but you never really talked regularly.

Kunigami was always a very polite guy, thanking you for every towel, every water bottle, always helping you with tasks that require strength, but he wasn’t very talkative, so you just assumed he was doing it out of simple generosity - he was a truly decent person. No wonder so many girls were swooning whenever he was on the field, it was always like this. His physique, handsome face, manners - you sometimes felt jealous over girls who could just openly state their feelings for Kunigami, because in your position it would be inappropriate. So you kept it nice and hidden.

Until you regretted it deeply.

There was this one particular fangirl who was on every match, cheering the loudest, always bringing Kunigami food “with lots of protein just as you like”, made herself a shirt that looks just like his football jersey. She was indeed very annoying and most of the team would either find her unbearable, or, as Otoya, were always staring at her ass in this very short skirt she was wearing.

And then you heard one day as you just arrived to school, that Kunigami has a girlfriend. It was like time stopped for a second. Till now you never expected your crush to date someone else, so in split seconds your heart was aching. Was this that girl? Did she finally succeed in her obnoxious tries?

The whole day at school felt like a fever dream. “Would’ve, should’ve, could’ve” was all over your brain. Maybe you should’ve confessed? Be more aggressive in your tries for his heart? Could you even have any chances?

You took your lunch out and tried to find a quiet place to eat, so you can spiral into your teenage depression a little more. But while going around school you passed the girl’s bathroom, just to hear The Short Skirt crying to her friends. You stopped right behind the door.

“He said that he has a girlfriend… and that I should stop coming on the matches… because it’s not okay towards her…” she took breaks to sniffle.

“You shouldn’t cry about it, we know you are way better than this half-ass girlfriend! There’s no way he got someone better than you!” - her friends were seriously doing their best.

Your brain was working fast. So it wasn’t her? You never saw Kunigami talking to any girl outside of you and her. Does he have a girlfriend outside of the school? Actually, Kunigami gives this vibe “neighbours to lovers” or “childhood friends to lovers”, so it wouldn’t be that far off.

You went to think about it in silence to one of the quieter wings of the school, and was just about to eat your sashimi, when someone aggressively entered the room.

“Oh, good. I found you.” you could see Kunigami was running just seconds ago. He was breathing just as he just ended a marathon. Was he that desperate to tell you that your presence bothers his girlfriend too? “Can I sit with you?”

“Sure” you only let out. He took a place meter away from you and didn’t say anything for a while. It started to get a little awkward, so you brought your bento closer to him.

“Do you have any lunch? Want some sashimi?” you went into your manager mode. If your players don’t eat well, how can they play well? Kunigami considered your offer for a split second.

“No, thank you” As always, you thought, Man of few words.

“So…” he started, while looking at the wall. “I don’t know if you heard the rumours yet”

You tried your best to keep your composure. “Yeah. You have a girlfriend? Congratulations” probably the lack of enthusiasm sold you away. At worst you can always pretend that you are just worried that he will play worse if he’d date, right? Because he is a valuable player.

“Yeah this one. So I kinda wanted to talk to you first, before you hear it, but…” he rubbed the back of his neck with embarrassment. “Yeah I should have told you yesterday. Sorry”

Oh? You frowned your brows. It’s not like you are such good friends that you would be the first person he’d say that he dates someone? Again you barely talk outside of practice. “Yeah I don’t think you owe me anything. Again good for you, Kunigami-kun”

“No, I don’t think you understand what I mean” he said quickly, like he was afraid you’d leave. “I don’t have a girlfriend.” You felt a little lost now.

“Actually…” he started, still not looking directly at you. “When I told this cheerleader girl that I have a girlfriend, I did it just so she would stop acting like this. It’s not true”

Oooooh. You blinked. Well, now the day started to get a little brighter. “And you wanted to tell me that… why?”

If you sit closer, you’d see how Kunigami’s ears were bright red. “So Bachira said, that maybe I should ask you to pretend to be my girlfriend for a while, so we would be sure that it looks realistic” he paused and finally looked at you. You never saw him looking so vulnerable. “Of course you don’t have to do anything. I was thinking that maybe I would walk you home, and we would eat lunch together, and we should exchange phone numbers…” With every word he looked more and more red. Could he be any more adorable than in this moment?

You smiled, and then dramatically sighed.

“I don’t know, Kunigami-kun. That is a lot of heat I am taking on myself - you have quite an aggressive funclub” you could feel how he freezes in fear, afraid of where are you going with this. Just like a scared puppy. “I think lunch and walking home are not enough. You owe me at least one date per week, where we go to the cinema, or to the arcade…” you thought for a while. “Honestly if you will not after every goal look at me and obnoxiously scream THIS ONE IS FOR YOU BABY, I don’t know if this is worth it. If I’m gonna get murdered by this witches, at least I wanna know you embarrassed yourself enough to compete with Shidou’s cringe. ”

You could feel how all of the stress just disappeared from his shoulders. He really had all of his little speech prepared.

“Okay” he said smiling. “But I’m not saying anything sexual, some things Shidou screams during the matches are seriously nightmare’s material.”

“Ah shoot, no INTO THE WOMB?” You decided to tease him some more, as he is technically now your boyfriend.

“Please stop”

“Then we go to the arcade twice per week”

“If you skip the embarrassing screaming, I can even win you plushies on every outing”

And just like that, you kinda wished The Short Skirt will never be fully convinced about you two, so you can spend time like this for long enough, so it will just become real.

And so did Kunigami.

By slowlyholypeanut please give credit don’t translate and don’t steal love u

Bachira is the best wingman for both Isagi and Kunigami 🫶 (and for himself) what an icon

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andraxicated · 1 year ago

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Intimacy in all its forms pt.2

Pairings: cyno, xiao, tighnari, kazuha, zhongli x f! reader

tags: fluff | highschool au!

a/n: this will be 3 parts with other characs!

pt. 1 |

Cyno | The intimacy of just looking at someone and dissolving into laughter together

his jokes never land for other people and to you. the only thing that was laughable was the deafening silence that followed. yet somehow with a thing called eye contact in an especially serious time, you find your body stilling to hold back the laughter that threatens to spill out while you present a project in front of the class.

it's all cyno's fault. he's staring at you with that dead look in his eyes and arms crossed and he knows what he's doing. he's also holding back his laughter but the way your voice subtly cracks renders him shaking that his seatmate asks if he was okay.

you constantly coughed to hide slips and continued presenting, not wanting to look at cyno anymore. "so therefore this model—hff! ehem—tells us of the relationship between variable 1—...and 2......"

so when the presentation ends, you came back to your seat with a glare at cyno as he looks down at the table to avoid eye contact. he's sitting with a hand over his mouth, pretending to not notice you passing by his desk. and when break time comes, you approach cyno and slap him on the back, garnering a groan from the man who was caught unaware of your presence.

"what was that for?" he asks, rubbing the part that was slapped.

"what do you think? you keep looking at me with a funny face!" you cry out and cyno rebuts, "that's my normal face though. just say that whenever you see me you start laughing 'cause you're so in love with me." with how blunt he was in saying those words, you were reminded of the fact that he actually graduated from being your friend, to now being your boyfriend. he's always there to make your ears bleed with those awful jokes that you secretly love, it was like a trademark of his personality.

you smirk, looking right into his eyes, but before you could retort a comeback with your mouth hanging open. both of you suddenly dissolve into uncontrollable laughter for absolutely no reason. it was just the way it was with cyno.

Xiao | The intimacy of someone sharing the meaning behind their tattoos

you knew him back then in middle school, he was quiet and sat at the back of the class. he was in the middle percentile with his grades and never quite stood out among everyone else. xiao was just there and you never cared. you transferred to a different high school yet you never knew a familiar face would one day come walking into the classroom and being introduced as a new student.

there's a saying that goes whoever sits next to you on the first day will become your friend. and that's quite what happened to you and xiao; you get lunch together, form eye contact to partner up, share some snacks, and your seats are closer than the others, plus, you frequently come over to his house bringing his favorite almond tofu

in everyone's eyes, you two were already an item yet you still had a question lingering at the back of your mind.

"I gotta ask...why do you always have a jacket on? even if it's summer you somehow stand the heat" xiao gulps at your question, he could never lie to you especially when you look at him like that. he answers, "I have a tattoo"

"wha-? can I see it??" you raise your brow as xiao nods, slowly taking his jacket off, showing his milky white skin and a green tattoo that almost covered his arm. your eyes widened in surprise and you wanted to ask him if a highschooler can even have a tattoo as big as that. but the question that comes out of your mouth was a bit different. "what's the meaning of it?"

it was too complex and entrancing, making you want to run your fingers over and trace them.

"it's a mythical being—an illuminated beast. a guardian spirit that protects humans against pestilence and evil." he momentarily looked at your reaction, waiting for you to be weirded out but you stayed silent with a glimmer in your eyes. "I...feel like an evil spirit. everyone around me has left in an accident, bad luck follows me and clings to them. their lives are cut too short and I'm starting to think—"

"that's not going to happen." you cut him off as his voice started to waver. you held his hand, caressing it to let him feel the warmth he craved. "whatever you're thinking isn't true. accidents are accidents and it has nothing to do with you."

he kept beating himself up with the guilt like he's some kind of grim reaper to the people around him. yet all it took to kill the negativity in his mind was your words. all it took was a caress of your hand and xiao then thought that he'd be simply okay if he were to just cling onto you.

Tighnari | The intimacy of ordering food and “shall we share it?”

you feel like you can't get used to this. this has been normal since you were friends but after becoming his girlfriend, it's like every little thing had a whole new different meaning. such as tighnari saying "that's all you want?" while nodding to your choice of dish on the menu. he's too absorbed in looking at the list to properly look at your mouth slightly parted.

"how about you? i'll treat you this time." you collect yourself yet still nervously tapping your fingers against your uniform. you don't even know if he likes this place you've dragged him to. considering, he's taking his time with the menu while covering his face. little do you know he's doing it all to hide the flush in his cheeks. because like you, he can't get used to this dating thing either.

"didn't you tell your friend that your allowance ran out earlier?" he spoke and your eyes widened, not expecting him to catch on that sorry excuse to your friend. truthfully...

"I still have some. I lied to her because I wanted to spend the last of my money with you."

an awful silence followed your words as you prayed for the ground to swallow you whole. it was becoming unbearably quiet until a held-back laughter escaped from tighnari's lips. he put down the menu to finally let you see his face and reddened ears. your sweet boyfriend was just looking at the menu to balance out what's your favorite and what's easy on the wallet. he can't have you spending lots when you're treating him, especially when you have other stuff like online shopping on who knows what.

"when the food arrives, shall we share it?"

"what?"

"ah? you don't want to share?"

"no! I mean I want to share!—you're so annoying!" you say as you stumble upon your words as tighnari only laughs. the bickering never goes away even as a couple.

Kazuha | The intimacy of sharing secrets in the nighttime, because 3am will never tell

the call time read 1 hour and 6 minutes as the clock hit 3 am. what you talked about for the past hour was a blur as you yawn, waiting for kazuha to come back from his bathroom break. you wanted to end the call, not wanting to hear any more of his girl problems and save yourself from the heartbreak of hearing him talk about someone so affectionately.

yet you're hopelessly in love with him, inwardly groaning when his voice comes to come in. "are you still there?" you hate that his voice made your heart pound. "mhm, I'm here"

"so...what do you think about what I said earlier? should I confess?" he asked as you grip your favorite plushie, wanting to smack its smiley face staring at you before you throw your phone. maybe you could use that as an excuse to not answer him at all.

you think about it deeply, not caring about his concern about your silence—not that you know what he's feeling. "I think..." you wanted to be the evil girl bestfriend and ruin his chances but you think about the karma that's gonna bite you back in the ass so you chose again, rolling your eyes as you speak. "I think you should confess if you're feeling confident anyway. if you get your heart broken then move on. we're still in highschool anyway it's not gonna last."

you wanted to smack yourself at those last words, it's obvious kazuha's not gonna like what you said yet he only laughs, shaking his head on the other side. "well, I want her to last because I'm envisioning a future with her. and...what about you? do you like someone?"

he's making your ears bleed. "yeah I like someone. I'm quite close with him actually."

"really?" you raise a brow at his long pause. "who?"

"he's a nobody."

kazuha chuckles, making you pout on the other line. "that's quite mean to say to the guy you like."

"he deserves it. because he's being mean to me." you reply and kazuha asks, "should I confront him? I'm quite good with a sword but I can't take it out of the house...maybe I could drag heizou with me since he's good at throwing punches—"

"yeah. knock yourself out. bye." you quickly end the call, screaming into your pillow as anxiety floods your brain if he ever caught onto what you said. you actually hope he doesn't. maybe if he asks about it you'll say that it means he should sleep, it's not about you liking him!

the dread of a message ping fills the air and you want to just sleep this in, worry about your pathetic advances in the morning. by burying your head in the pillow, you soon fall asleep to the sound of two other pings.

(y/n) I'm gonna tell you something tomorrow. for now, have a good sleep :)

Zhongli | The intimacy of stopping to wait when someone needs to tie their shoe

he's blabbering all about history like a broken record as you pass by his favorite landmark in the city—an old building that was architecturally majestic and had a lot of history. you take your eyes off it when you step on a shoelace come undone, letting out a small sigh as you kneel on the ground.

you tie it swiftly and rose your head to catch gazes with zhongli who's staring from a towering height. "why were you staring like that?" you stand up, dusting some dirt on your pants as you walk beside him in a sudden silence.

"I was waiting for you." he says and you smile, shaking your head as you interlock fingers with him.

"I thought you weren't gonna notice me. you do that sometimes you know? leaving me behind." "I don't know what you're talking about." zhongli deadpans as you exchange banter, you were giggling most of the time with your own jokes while zhongli can't do anything but watch you laugh. he suddenly looks down at your shoes and you soon feel it too. the other shoelace had come undone like earlier.

yet before you could squat down to fix it, zhongli did it first with his deft fingers between the laces, double tying to prevent it from loosening while you wait for him and beam down like a child. he stands up to his full height and doesn't question why you're smiling, instead, he holds out his hand for you to take, intertwining fingers as people see a highschool couple walk down the street too close to each other. zhongli eventually got used to the pda.

"thank you" you whisper as you wait for the stoplight. he then pulls your head closer to press a kiss, whispering back with a smile he fails to hide.

"don't mention it"

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waywardsou2 · 1 month ago

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Kinktober 2024: Alpha/Beta/Omega

Based on this post

Ngl this is very self indulgent and I will not be apologising for it. The scene with Soap walking in...the way it was in my head was delicious

Characters / Ships | Simon "Ghost" Riley X John "Soap" Mactavish X Male Reader

Summary | Being a male Omega in America is the worst of worst luck. Your doctor had agreed to fake the form when you were diagnosed at 11. But forgetting to take your suppressants can lead to a disaster. Or maybe a night to remember

Word Count | 4.1k+

Tags: a/b/o dynamics, scenting, double penetration, cussing, mentions of rape, dub con (if you squint), face fucking, slick, knotting

The mission had gone south. So far south that you had passed fucking geese on their way to migrate for the winter.

Two missed marks, false Intel and on-top of that a fucking snow storm had rolled in out of no where forcing the three of you to haul up in the closest building that still had its roof and walls.

That was your only grace here. That and the fact that Ghost was a walking heater. Somehow still radiating enough warmth to keep both you and Soap warm even though there was nothing to keep the chill from the storm out of this abandoned house.

The house was suitable enough. Four walls, a roof and the glass still in the windows.

All and all it could be worse.

And then it was. It got fucking worse.

Feigning needing to pee you walk away to the bathroom and lock the door. Quickly stripping off your gear as you felt something coating the inside of your boxers.

Shit

Shit shit shit

For all of your life you had been on suppressants to hide the fact that you were an Omega. Most people assumed you were a Beta and that was fine with you. They had thought that since your secondary sex characteristics started to show. But a year later they developed full and one trip to the doctors made your life come tumbling down.

In American society Omega's weren't good for anything other than being cock whores and pup bearers.

Thank fuck the doctor was reliable and had offered to fake the tests and prescribe your monthly prescription of suppressants.

After that you finished school and fresh out of highschool you enlisted to the military. Having lived with suppressants all your life you never had the face the challenges of being an Omega. Never been smelt on the streets or attacked in your own home. Everyone believes you were a Beta. And thought it was looked down upon for a man like yourself to be a Beta rather than an alpha at least you weren't an Omega. Or at least everyone believed so.

Price was the only one who knew. Since he was in-charge of what could and couldn't be delivered to the barracks and he made sure to scoop up your bi weekly delivery of suppressants and hand them to you under the table like a cover drug dealing.

Which technically it was.

You were thankful for Price.

But of course today was the day when your suppressants would start wearing off and you needed to take another dose. And instead you were a whole ocean away from getting what you needed and with a snow storm to boot. Keeping you trapped inside this house with two Alpha's.

You were so fucked

In every sense of the word

Simon and Johnny had been closest to you in the barracks despite being your Sargent and Lieutenant. The only guys who could put up with your attitude like it was a full time job. You and Johnny were the only ones who laughed at Simon's joke and only you and Simon were privy to Johnny's idle flirting. To anyone on the outside you three might've looked like a poly couple. But you were mostly happy with just being friends.

Mostly.

You'd never told either of them but you definitely had the biggest crushes on them when you first joined the military. However you never mentioned it to them because they seemed so warped around each other's fingers you didn't want to get in their way.

But right now you didn't know what to do. You didn't think leaving this room was a good idea with your heat building after years of never reaching the surface thanks to the suppressants and the puddle of slick coating the inside of your boxers and legs.

You had nothing to stop your heat and no way to cool yourself down. You could feel a sweat slowly building under your skin and a warmth in your stomach and solar plexus that was growing despite the cold. And snow wouldn't help at all you would just get hypothermia.

Fuck

"Aye lad, is everythin' aight in there?" Soaps voice called from the main room they had "set up camp" in

"Y-Yeah" you called back. You looked around and through some cupboards before you found some spare toilet paper and tried to clear up the mess in your pants but the slick in your heat was still seeping down your legs.

Sighing and smacking yourself in the head for being such an idiot you pull up your pants and buckle them as tight as you can.

Yeah as if that'll help dumbass

You open the door and hope that the Alpha's can't smell you.

You join them back in what you thought used to be a living room and sit on the dusty couch. Keeping your legs firmly crossed.

But after a while even to your nose the sent in the air was growing heavier by the second and you were starting to feel dizzy. Your body was clammy with sweat soaking your undershirt and the heat in your stomach becoming almost unbearable.

It hurt but in a good way and you couldn't think about that. Instead you watched your friends. Ghost was scoping the surroundings, not that you believed he could actually see anything useful and Soap was counting their rations to try and see how long they could survive given a worst case scenario.

You fucking hated Russia. Fuck Russia and it's stupid weather and bad Intel and bad timing.

After an hour of silence it was clear that you couldn't hide your situation anymore though you desperately tried to ignore all the signs. You watched as Soap counted the rations, he paused momentarily and you heard him take a deep breath in. Freeze and then continue calculating.

You knew that he knew you were watching him. And you knew he could smell you. His Alpha nose being attuned to the scent of an Omega in heat. The primal side of him recognises the scent of a potential mate and pup bearer.

Ghost on the other hand had gone rigid. His head no longer moving to try and see anything from a new angle out the window. You couldn't see from here but you didn't been think his eyes were moving anymore either.

Eventually he turned around. Addressing you by your rank.

Fuck

He never did that unless you were around other people. Or in deep shit. Which was often

"Private...I think there might be somethin you need to tell us"

Soap paused again, this time he looked up. He was also very rigid.

"Do I really have to say it?" You ask stubbornly as you put your hands over your stomach to cover it.

"No. Ya don't"

You sighed heavily as another warmer wave of heat washed over you.

"How come ya never told us?" Soap asked

"Johnny do you really think I would let slip to anyone in the barracks that I was secretly an Omega? I would get kicked out of the military. Or worse raped"

"Aye, that's true" he began packing away the rations before standing up

"We have about 5 days worth of rations if we stretch it. Hopefully the storm won't last that long"

Ghost looked at Soap

"Are you changing the subject?" Ghost said flatly

Soap made a face somewhere between a coy smile and a grimace

Ghost rolled his eyes inside his mask.

"How long since your last heat. I wouldn't ask, you know that. But given the situation..."

He didn't finished his sentence. It had occurred to him now what deep shit you were in. Two Alpha's with an Omega who had a lifetimes worth of heat built up in his system all trapped in a confined space. This was bound to get nasty.

"Well, I've been on suppressants since I was categorised. The doctor faked my-"

Ghost cut you off "I didn't ask for your life story. I asked for a date"

Ghost was being harsher than he was with you usually. It put you off, but you could understand why. All of you could get in deep trouble for this. Not just between each other but with higher up in command too.

"Never. I've never had one"

Ghost ran a hand over his face and turned away. A muffled 'oh for fuck sake' coming from his direction.

Generally Omega's only had sex or mated during heat. And he knew for a fact you didn't make a habit of sleeping around. If at all. The Alpha inside him reared its head at that knowledge. You were an Omega, a virgin Omega. On your first heat within walking distance of him.

He swallowed hard.

"Well we need to figure out what to do because this-" he pointed to the tree of you "-isn't going to work"

"Why not?" Soap cut in "We aren't some dickheads wandering the street waiting for an Omega to slip up. He's our friend we aren't going to do that. We are literally trained for self control Simon"

Ghost sighed again, more frustrated than anything

"I know you'd like to believe that Johnny but when has that ever happened in history? That's not how this works"

Soap swallowed. He was always good natured when it came to those he cared about and he always liked to believe best. Just because he was one of the biggest gentlemen in the barracks doesn't mean he wasn't without the influence of his primal urges. Evolution deemed it that there wasn't any other way.

Ghost walked past you and grabbed Soap by the arm. Whisking him out of the room to talk to him privately.

In the mean time another wave of heat hit and you couldn't take it anymore. You had sat there listening to the two of them while you felt your pants get soaked and waves of heat rolled through your body. It was unbearable.

You stripped yourself of your gear and under armour. Hoping that was enough but another wave of heat hit and it still wasn't enough. You took off your shirt and your boots. Trying to give your body some room to cool down but nothing worked. You were like the core of a nuclear reactor.

You heard Soap and Ghost talking heatedly in the next room over and it was enough to make your inner Omega whine. The sound of two Alpha's so close but still out of reach.

You hated how clingy and whiney you felt. You'd never dealt with the full extent of a heat. Merely a suppressed one. Mood swings, high libido and a day of hot flushes. But nothing more. This was nothing like that. This was a full blown heat. Like the stuff you read about in the pamphlets your doctor had given you.

You took a deep sniff of the air like you were taking a drag of a blunt. Clinging to it as if I was hanging in the air like fog. The smell of two Alpha's who were very very horny. The scent of want and need permeating the air.

You unbuckled your belt. All inhibitions gone.

The faint scent of two alphas.Your Alpha's. Was enough to kick start your heat fully.

You strip off your pants to find that your boxers are completely soaked all the way through. Your slick dripping through to your jeans.

You scoop up some of the slick and smell it. The intrigue getting the better of you. That's when you hear a thunk from the next room. Part of you is terrified. But that part is oh so small compared to the feelings of arousal you have thinking about your two Alpha's.

Simon walks through the door first. Seeing your completely naked, legs open with your hand in your heat touching the slick that is seeping into the couch beneath you.

As sweat trickled over your body you watched a Simon pulled off his mask and seemed to stand frozen. Fighting himself in front of you.

"Tell me to go and I will. I'll shoot myself in the foot in the other room" he says it strained. The look in his eyes filled with fire.

Your Omega reaches out for Simon. To have him help you and relieve you of the pain in your stomach. To fill you up so good. You trust him, and you know he can't help it.

This isn't the way you would have gone about this but you didn't have a choice. To you he isn't taking advantage of you though you don't have the words to say that right now. You don't have the words to tell him how much you've wanted this.

So you call his name. The word slips from your mouth in a low whine.

And he's rushing to you. Stripping himself of his gear and off his clothing in the split second it takes him to get to you.

He's on you in moments pressing his lips to your mouth and pulling your body towards his half undressed one. With his free hand he is still trying to take off the rest of his clothes. You help him out by unbuckling his pants and he takes his hand off your body to strip them off.

He's back on you again and you can feel his own heat radiating off of him. Not his natural human heater heat. This is heat from Alpha arousal.

He grinds his hips into yours desperately and tugs at your legs pulling them apart. The two of you accidentally slip off the couch but you don't stop your frantic gripping and kissing of each other.

Simon pulls away from you to to bend you over in front of him. Your knees creaking on the floor boards as you use your hands to steady yourself not to go crashing face first into the ground. Simon crouched behind you to get a full view of your heat and groans as he takes in what he sees.

"Fuck you're a Prime"

What? You hadn't ever heard that terminology used in regards to Omega's

"What?" You gasp, need still lacing your voice as you try and push back again Simon's body.

Briefly he tries to explain "God. You're a Prime. It means you don't have two holes like most Omega's. Even most male omegas have two. But all your reproductive organs are connected to the one. God damn it.

He watched as your ass leaked with shiny slick and he didn't hesitate before he stuck his fingers inside of you. They slipped too easily past the ring of muscles with how much slick had already coated your insides.

You moan at the sudden intrusion but it is so welcome. Finally some fucking action

Simon pulls his fingers in and out, a dirty squelching sound coming from your hole. Simon pulls out his fingers now covered in slick and licks them clean before shoving them back in again. All four at once.

You cry out again at the larger intrusion but you can't help but press back further into Simon. God he could work with his hands. And from watching him clean his gun you could only imagine what he looked like knuckle deep inside of you.

He pulled his fingers out again roughly and sucked them off one by one. Lapping up the slick.

"God I can't wait to fuck you. Fill you up so good little Omega"

It was then that you realised a few things.

One, whatever version of Simon you knew as Lieutenant Ghost was gone. Replaced with this inhabited, almost feral Alpha with little self control

Two, you were such a whore for Simon's dirty talk.

You felt as he pressed his cock to your hole before you were overtaken with sharp pain. He grabbed a fist full of your hair and pulled you up. Your back resting against his chest as held you by the hips over his cock.

"How much" you asked breathlessly. Not being able to help how needy and horny you are for him

"Eight inches" he whispers before sliding the head of his cock inside of your ass.

You can't see it from here but you can only imagine what you look like. You moan at how much Simon is already stretching your hole and whimper at the sensation.

You beg, you beg for more and you whine and you call Simon's name.

He growls as he grips onto your hips tighter and pushes your tight hole over his cock. Sheathing it inside of your slicked heat.

You cry out again. His cock rubbing up against your insides. The tip kissing your prostate making you wriggle around for some friction.

Simon begins bucking his hips up into you. At the same time he pulls you up by the hips. His strong grip digging bruises into the flesh.

You whine at the friction and the lack of fulfilment as he pulls out only to moan again when he slides you back down and begins to pick up a comfortable rhythm. One that has your legs shaking as your toes curl by his thighs.

His thighs were huge sitting like this. Your whole body fits comfortably on his legs and the idea of his thighs pinning you down makes your squirm even more.

Through the squelching sound your combined moans you hear a muffled fuck come from the room Soap was still in. And soon in the same fashion Simon had burst through the door Johnny was following suit. Already abandoning his clothes. His belt buckle undone.

He couldn't help himself could he, the sound of your moans and Simon's dirty talk was enough to make his own cock harden and leak pre-come.

"Fuck it" he growled as he finally stripped himself entirely of his shirt and pants. He got down on his knees pressing his mouth to yours. Swallowing an on coming moan.

His tongue is instantly inside your mouth. The wet flesh invading your mouth, you welcome the feeling of his mouth on yours.

"God did kissing people always feel this good" he mumbled into your mouth.

"Just wait until you see what they are packing down stairs. This little Omega is a Prime" Simon says into your ear. Close enough so Johnny could hear it

"You have a little fantasy about Primes don't you Johnny" Simon teased

You felt Johnny's face warm up against your own and he pulls away momentarily. You see him blush.

"Si seriously?" but Simon simply chuckles.

You moan and take one of your hands off of Simons to hold onto Johnny as Simon rams into your prostate

But you aren't done. You aren't full enough yet. Desperately you look at Johnny

"Johnny fuck my face. I know you want to. Just- Jesus fuck~ Please" tears threaten to sting your eyes from the heighten emotions that were consuming you.

Johnny stops for a moment. An almost innocent look on his face before it dissolves and that same fire Simon had in his eyes, you could now see in Johnny's.

He stands up in front of you and strokes his cock a few times. You hold your mouth open, desperately, expectantly.

And Johnny puts his cock on your tongue before pushing it inside. You moan heavily and relax your jaw allowing him more room to push inside. He does and then pulls out again pushing back in and adding a few more inches.

You don't have ruler on your tongue but you guess Johnny has to be at least 6 inches.

He pushes in and out and begins to speed up to Simon's rapid pace.

The two of them ruin your holes and you moan around Johnny's cock. Sending shivers up his spine as you do so.

If you could you would be calling their names but you are too busy sucking off Johnny to do that.

God this is more than you ever wanted. Maybe not in this circumstance but in your dreams you had seen this moment. Hopped that maybe one day you would trust yourself enough to tell your best friends how you felt. And tell them about the biggest secret a person could possibly have.

And yeah it wasn't a romantic like you had daydreamed about. But this was probably the second best outcome. Being filled by your two Alpha friends.

The three of you felt your climaxes coming to a head and you moaned harder at the idea of being knotted by your alphas. Being knotted for the very first time.

Your ass clenched around Simon at the thought. Trying to hold him inside of you preemptively despite the slick.

Simon moaned in your ear and whispered "So needy. Ain't ya. Such a needy little male Omega"

Johnny threw his head back and you tried to look at him. You could feel in your mouth his knot starting to expand and you moved your hands to grip into his thighs as he continued to thrust.

As the knot built you could feel Simon attempt to pull out but you dug your nails into his thighs. He looked down at you and with the most minute movement you shook you head silently begging him not to pull out. That you could take it. You wanted to.

Knotting someone's mouth wasn't necessarily advisable but damn did you want it. So, you tugged Johnny forward as you felt Simon's rhythm become messy. He was close too.

Johnny popped first. Your begging eyes pulling his climax out of him as his knot swelled inside of your mouth as he tried to pull out and could past your jaw. He orgasmed, the cum hitting the back of your throat. You sucked, swallowing every drop wanting his cum inside of you so desperately.

Simon came next. His knot catching at your tight of muscles and you moaned feeling the size of it plug your ass as he filled you up with cum. Both of their knots release inside of you. Their size filling you up from both ends.

You came as well you dick spurting white cum over your stomach and legs in between you and Johnny

You moan as your eyes roll back in your head feeling Simon's cum coat the inside of your stomach. Or technically your womb.

After what felt like an eternity the two of them stopped cumming as their knots deflated. And gently the pulled out of you.

Your ass leaked with cum and slick and your mouth was bruised. Lips swelling slightly from how hard Johnny had been thrusting.

Since this was your first heat you assumed it would only last for 2 or 3 days. But that was still a long time especially if you were going to be snowed in.

Johnny walked away only to come back a few seconds later with that spare toilet paper you had found earlier and gently cleaned off your face and the rest of your body. Simon held you tightly not wanting to let go of you. The possessiveness still over taking him.

He butted his head into your back and you asked him what was wrong

"I wanna scent ya real bad"

Johnny hummed in agreement as he continued to clear you off to the best of his ability. Once he done a thorough job he chucked the ruined toilet paper in the tipped over bin.

Thinking it might be time to let your true intentions come out you place a hand on the one Simon was using to hold you against him and you extended one to Johnny.

"I'm sorry it happened like this. But I think my Omega finally gave out when my heat hit and the two of you were more of a catalyst than you realised. I've liked you guys for ages. I just assumed you two were an item, so I never said anythingz. I- I want you two to be my mates. If you'll have me "

Johnny took your hand and held it up to his face. A light vibration coming from him as he purred at the genuine affection.

"Are you fuckin' purin' Johnny"

"Piss off" he chuckled back

Johnny took your confession of love as the ascent to rub the scent gland on your wrist to the one on his neck. Gently kissing the tops of your fingers in the process.

Simon did the same. Taking your hand and holding it in his. Rubbing your scent glands together.

All in all. Maybe this wasn't so bad after all

Tbh I'm considering making this a part two. What do you guys think? I might make it a standalone fic on my AO3 as well

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serotonins-stuff · 9 months ago

Note

I have a Bakugou x fem! reader request if you’re willing!

so reader is really smart but disguises it at school because she’s afraid people (especially boys) will think she’s stuck-up and unattractive. But Bakugou sees through her act and likes how smart she is and asks her out in his own Bakugou way.

Preferably fluff but suggestive bc Bakugou is turned on by smart women ;)

thanks!

Smartass | K•Bakugo

Includes : Fluff

Warnings : none

A/n: Apologies for only getting to the requests months later :), I've got quite slot on my schedule.

Exhaustion wouldn't even be able to explain how you felt after an all nighter, studying your ass off for a biology test after all you've done the past week is hang out with your friends who could care less about good grades.

Being in this highschool meant that you would be classified as a nerd if anyone knew about the lengths you go through for a perfect score, so naturally you did everything you could to avoid that.

You never bragged or showed anyone your scores, you never raised your hand in class even if your mind was tearing you apart for knowing the answer, and because of this no one had gotten suspicious of your actions because you were sure to attract as little attention towards yourself as possible.

Though, at least that's what you thought.

You were convinced that you fooled everyone but, unbeknownst to you, there was always someone watching you from the corner of your eye.

Bakugo Katsuki, the only person in your class who found your behavior suspicious.

Occasionally he would pass by while you're talking to your friends in the hall and overhear you claim that you didnt study for the test. Though it would be a different story when he got a glance of your perfect score from where he sat behind you.

Today was no different, because as soon as you got your paper you flipped it upside down before a look of dissapproval crossed your features. It made his blood boil. Why would someone as smart as you not want to show off their skills to the world?

"We're going to have a class project" The teacher spoke out, "As you all know we're going to the aquarium next week-."

Various complains could be heard by some of the students and you tried to refrain from showing your excitement.

The idea of biology made you feel giddy inside. You were just imagining how calming it would be like to be in the presence of so much aquatic life, in the dimmly lit hues of the water cascading all around the building.

"As I was saying.." She cleared her throat and everyone went silent. "I'm going to be putting you in pairs"

Your heart dropped.

She had to be joking right?. The people in your class had to be the laziest people you had ever met in your life, and there was no way you were going to be stuck with them for a whole day.

Every group project you've been in, there would always be only one person who did the the work, while the others would slack off, and that person was you.

Nobody ever handed their assignments in on time or even took it the slightest bit of interest. You played along with their act, fearing that they'd judge you for being a goody two shoes if you spoke up. In your own time you'd sit by yourself to finish the project and of course they'd take all the credit. They always take the credit.

A pair of hands slammed down on your desk and you flinched.

"You dreaming in class?" He scoffed, staring you down with his crimson eyes, His face held a neutral expression, and could feel from his aura that he was trying to read you.

"Katsuki Bakugo" you said in acknowledgement, averting your eyes from his to break the somewhat intense staredown.

"Y/n L/n" he tilted his head, not once looking away from your face. "Pair up with me"

You looked at him with shock, was this the same Bakugo who always wanted to work by himself because 'everyone else is weak', now standing at your table demanding you to work with him?

You never really spoke to him in class, but often you'd find yourself staring at him whenever you had hero training. He was always so focused and well calculated. On the battle field he's better than you in every aspect.

He was smart, possibly even smarter you, so why did he need you on his team when he'd just fine by himself?

"Um, why me?" You you're voice wavered.

"You're one of the only idiots in this class who actually put in the effort"

Your eyes widened and you stared at him to search for any sign that he was joking, but he wasn't. Could this mean that he was one of the people that actually acknowleded your hard efforts?

"What you're what you're talking abo-"

He cut you off before rolling his eyes. "You can't pull that clueless act shit on me and you know that."

You avertes your gaze and he continued. "You get a perfect score on almost every test, yet you don't tell anyone that cause you don't wan em to know you're a smartass."

He would rather much have to work with you than the other people in the class, considering you always take the number two spot regarding academics. He's always right ahead of you, scowling in first place, but hell- even he had to admit that there was nothing hotter than a smart woman. If anything he wanted to see this smartness up close, test the limits, and see just how much of your intelligence you were hiding from everyone else.

Don't get him wrong, he loved getting first place, though it wasn't really worth it if his opponents weren't going to give him a challenge. He wanted to fight for his place, give blood his blood sweat and tears for it.

And what better way to do that then get his academic rival pumped up?

You sighed in defeat and he reached into his pocket to pull out his phone. "We'll have to do research, you free after school?"

He looked away slightly bashful as your fingers brushed against his to type in your number.

"Yeah I am, did you have any place in mind?"

"The cafe two blocks down, afterschool" he said abruptly and turned to leave but stopped when you spoke.

"I don't know where that is" you said softly.

"I'll walk you there after school" he replied, a tiny hint of nervousness coming from his voice.

He needed to end this conversation or else he was gonna end up looking like a tomato from all of this blushing. He practiced this conversation a million times in his head and even that wasn't enough to prepare him. Hearing your voice address him did things to him that nobody would ever understand. The look of your sweet gaze directed to him was more than he could ever ask for.

This class project was a great excuse for him to get to know you better, but you didn't need to know that.

It would've been embarrassing if you noticed him acting all weird, but luckily you were too trappped in your own little world to notice.

•••

A/n. (again) : Focused on getting requests out :)

See you all on Friday.

#bakugo x reader #katsuki bakugo x reader #katsuki x you #mha bakugou #mha fluff #mha x reader #my hero acedamia #bakugo katsuki #serotonins stuff

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swrkn · 8 days ago

Text

Between the lines (part 2)

Highschool!hyuk x Highschool!reader

Genre ; sfw , fluff

Author note ; i said i was gonna do a part 2 to this story so here it is today ;)

Hyuk found himself walking to the library after school more often than he expected. At first, he told himself it was just about getting better at math. You were a great tutor, and his grades were actually starting to improve. But deep down, he knew the real reason he kept showing up was you.

Every session started the same way: you would wave him over to your usual spot by the window, where the afternoon light streamed in, illuminating notebooks and textbooks. You’d go through the problems, your patient voice guiding him through each step.

But over time, your conversations began to drift away from equations and formulas.

“So,” you said one afternoon, leaning back in your chair after you’d finished a particularly tough problem set, “how come you never talk much in class?”

Hyuk glanced at you, quit surprised. “Didn’t think anyone noticed.”

You smiled. “I notice. You’re always staring out the window, like you’re somewhere else.”

Hyuk shrugged, a little embarrassed. “Guess I just don’t like drawing attention to myself. People assume I don’t care about school, but it’s not that simple.”

You tilted your head, curious. “Then why don’t you show them what you’re capable of? You’re smarter than you let on, Hyuk.”

Your words caught him off guard. He’d never heard anyone say that before—not like they really believed it.

“Maybe,” he said, his voice softer. “I don’t know. It’s easier to just… stay in the background.”

You didn’t press further, but the way you looked at him made Hyuk feel like you saw right through his defenses.

“What about you?” he asked, changing the subject. “You’re always so focused. Don’t you ever get tired of being perfect all the time?”

You laughed, a sound that made Hyuk’s heart skip. “Perfect? Far from it. I just… I guess I feel like I have to prove myself. My parents expect a lot, and sometimes it feels like I’m always racing to keep up.”

Hyuk frowned. “That sounds tough.”

“It is,” you admitted, gaze dropping to your hands. “But that’s why I like these study sessions. It’s different. You’re different.”

Hyuk blinked. “Me?”

“Yeah,” you said, your smile returning. “You don’t pretend to be someone you’re not. It’s refreshing.”

Hyuk felt his face heat up, and for once, he was glad you weren’t looking directly at him.

As the weeks went on, your bond grew stronger. You’d laugh over dumb jokes, share stories about classmates, and sometimes, just sit in comfortable silence. Hyuk started to look forward to those quiet moments in the library, where it felt like the rest of the world didn’t matter.

One day, as y’all were packing up, you looked lire you were hesitating about something.

“Hey, Hyuk,” you said, with your voice a little nervous.

“Yeah?”

“There’s this school festival coming up next weekend. I was wondering if… you’d want to go with me? You know, as a break from all this studying.”

Hyuk stared at her, caught off guard. “Like… together?”

You nodded, looking embarrassed. “Yeah, I mean, if you want to.”

Hyuk’s heart raced. He’d been waiting for a moment like this, but now that it was here, he could hardly believe it.

“I’d like that,” he said, his voice steady despite the butterflies in his stomach. “Let’s go together.”

Your smile lit up the room. “Great. It’s a date, then.”

The festival was everything Hyuk had hoped for and more. The two of you wandered through the booths, playing games and sharing snacks. You laughed freely, your usual seriousness replaced by a playful energy that Hyuk couldn’t get enough of.

At one point, you found yourselves sitting under a tree, watching the sunset as the festival lights flickered on.

“This is nice,” you said, with a soft voice.

“Yeah,” Hyuk agreed, slightly glancing at you “It is.”

There was a brief silence, the kind that felt more like anticipation than awkwardness.

“Y/N,” Hyuk said, his voice a little hesitant.

You turned to him, with curious eyes. “Yeah?”

“I’ve been wanting to say something for a while now,” he admitted, his heart pounding. “I really like spending time with you. You make everything… better.”

Your eyes softened, and you reached out your hand, gently brushing against his. “I feel the same way, Hyuk.”

Hyuk’s breath caught. “Really?”

You nodded, your smile shy but sincere. “Yeah. I’ve liked you for a while now.”

Hyuk couldn’t help but grin. “Guess I’ve been pretty slow to catch up, huh?”

You laughed, squeezing his hand. “Maybe a little. But you’re here now, and that’s what matters.”

As the festival music played softly in the background, Hyuk leaned closer, his nerves fading. You met him halfway, your lips brushing in a gentle, tentative kiss.

When you pulled back, both of you were smiling, the weight of unspoken feelings finally lifted.

From that moment on, everything felt lighter, brighter. You weren’t just study partners or friends anymore. You were something more.

And for Hyuk, life suddenly felt a whole lot more meaningful.

✵

#windbreaker webtoon #windbreaker x reader #wind breaker webtoon #windbreaker manhwa #windbreaker manhwa x reader #hyuk kwon x reader #windbreaker webtoon x reader #wind breaker x reader #windbreaker hyuk #hyuk kwon #hyuk #kwon hyeok #swrkn

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shocymer · 9 months ago

Text

Goodbye Summer

"The friend label is a label I'm going to hate. Our story ended without even started."

Pairing : Mingi x afab!reader

Word counts : 4k

Contents : highschool au, angst, flashback, lived by the beach, TW! mention of divorce, slightly depressed reader, miscommunication issue.

A/N : The fic is inspired by "f(x) - Goodbye Summer". It's been my favorite song since it was released (bcs relatable af). Also this one took a set in early 2000 with Taiyou No Uta as my reference. Oh btw I don't use japanese semester system, I matched it with how it goes in my country. I hope everyone enjoy it! ♡

2nd Year. Autumn 2006

You walked through the class corridor while sorting some papers from the student council. You heard fast paced step behind you,

“Better watch out girly,” he took your papers and continue running again.

He laughs maniacally, at some point he stop in the middle of corridor waiting for you to catch him up. As he saw you getting closer, he lift your paper high up. He amused by your action, struggling to reach those papers.

“Mingi! Can you stop!” You keep trying to reach it.

“Nah, I don’t want to,” he lift it even higher.

“If you don’t stop any moment, I’m gonna-”

“Hmm? Gonna what?” He put his face in front of you, staring into your eyes. You saw the opportunity as he lower his grip.

“Gonna grab this damn papers, thanks by the way,” you managed to get it, swiftly walk away from him.

He followed you, asking if you’re getting busy again as student council. You responded him with annoyance till both of you immersed in conversation as you walked back to your classroom.

2nd Year. Winter 2006

You blew your hands to heat it up. Today is awfully the coldest day since winter started. Silly you, you forgotten your mittens leaving it out nicely on your study desk. You keep cursing to yourself as you only brought limited hot pack and is enough for your stomach only. Everything’s ruined because the exam period.

“You keep blowing it like a freshly baked bread.” Mingi suddenly walk beside you.

You only gave him side eye. Too lazy to respond him. Like who the hell blowing a fresh baked bread out of the oven, that isn’t funny at all. You muttering some words and keep rubbing your hands.

He notice it before he took one of your hand and guide it to his winter coat pocket. He hold your hand tightly. You took a glance at him, he keep a straight face remain unbothered. It’s not the usual himself. You knew him that he’s a playful silly guy who always teasing you whenever he likes.

“Stay still if you don’t mind, I don’t bring mine too,” his eyes darting towards his hands.

You shrugged a little bit, nodding your head. “Thanks Mingi. We almost at school too.”

He smiled and grip your hand tighter in his pocket.

2nd Year. Spring 2007

“.. I like you,” faintly you heard a love confession.

New semester is just started and the vibe suddenly change. ‘New semester new you’ , ‘love is in the air’, and you blame the pollen scattering everywhere as it worsen your allergy. Just like the situation right now, you can find love confession almost every spot in the school including the stairs.

You never get the hype of other students cheering on it like an interesting show. And now you’re trapped, have been hiding for solid 7 minutes on the 3rd floor stairs. Afraid of make them feel awkward if you suddenly pass by them. So you politely hiding in your place. You’ve been on your flip phone to kill some time, but you’re growing impatient wondering who take a love confession so long.

Curiosity kills the cat like people said, you took a little peek between the railings. You saw the girl, but you’ve got no idea who she is. Then you tilt your head to get a better view, you saw the tall familiar figure. You recognize those side profile, those tall nose, and those eyes, it’s Mingi. Your heart sting for a while then you sat on the stairs quietly trying to grasp the situation. At the end you only heard their laughter slowly fading away.

2nd Year. Summer 2007

“Got some plans for summer?” Mingi poked your arms.

You lift your head trying to look at him. Headache taking over you as today is the last day of exam. 2 weeks of distress you only facing your books non-stop. And finally your hard work has paid of when the summer break getting closer.

“Dunno, gotta wait the result come out first.”

“Wanna go to the beach?” He asked you again.

You let out a heavy sigh, “I’m worried if I’ll take summer class.”

“We’re going afternoon, incase if one of us get that supplementary class,” he assured you.

You nod at him. He pat your shoulder before leaving you to talk to another classmate. Everything felt awkward after you saw him that day on the spring. First of all you’re not that close to him. Both of you only a casual classmate. But since that day, you tried your best to avoid him hoping it’ll hide the strange feeling in your heart. Deep down inside, you intended to move on from him hoping you can be your usual self. And this summer break is surely a perfect timing.

⁠✧

The summer breeze blew your hair gently, leading you to grip your hat tightly. Mingi told you to meet him before the railway that separate almost half of the town. You waited him, sitting on your bike. Your eyes look towards the sea from this distance. The beach is not difficult to reach, it only took 10 minutes from where you live. But going with him is a rare thing.

There’s still no sign of him. You pull out your flip phone, trying to check the time. Undecided whether sent him a message or not, you keep opening and closing his contact. During the summer break you didn't contact him at all. Still unsure about your feelings, you’re afraid of falling too deep. So you just wait for his message if he remembers those plan he made before. You reread his last message,

(Minkimingi) Meet me by the railway tomorrow afternoon, cya!

You let out a heavy sigh and finally send him one,

(You) Where are you? I might get carried by the wind cuz waiting you for too long.

The vibration startled you, didn’t expect him to replied you so soon.

(Mingkymingi) I don’t live by the shore my dear princess, please be patient.

Gasped by the nickname he gave, you slump your head to the bike handlebar. ‘Goddamit Song Mingi, I shouldn't have come, right?’ Still battling with your inner thought, suddenly you feel a cold sensation at the back of your neck. You turned quickly only to find him chuckling while holding a can of cold drink.

“As a good friend, I know you must be craving this,” he handed you the drink.

Yeah friend. You forced a smile before reaching those drink. Open it up instantly then chugging it. You’re observing him without you realize. He’s still in his summer uniform. As you guess he took the supplementary class. Beads of sweats rolled down his forehead, of course that’s the result of him riding his bike in a hurry. Till his eyes met yours, returning your gaze.

“I never expect you’ll suit in those white.. flowy.. dress..”

“Friends do not do that,” you put emphasis on your words by reflex.

“That?”

Without thinking you answered him quickly,

“complimenting each other.”

He ruffled his hair as frustration drawn on his face.

“Well.. let’s say it’s not a compliment, but what’s wrong with friends complimenting each other?”

Fed up by every time he mention that label, you pedal your bike away towards the beach leaving him alone. You heard him yelling from distance,

“we’re still waiting others! Where are you going?!”

“I’m tired of waiting, meet me at the beach!” You yelled back at him.

⁠✧

The sky began to show its golden tinge. The seagulls flew to and fro over the sea. The waves rolled rhythmically and some of your classmate surf on them. Everyone is enjoying this moment, some of them playing volleyball, some of them splashing the waters towards each other, then here you are sat on the beach while thinking about your original intention of coming here.

You guessed nothing changes. The fact you’re still bitter by him is irritated you even more. You’re eyes are always on his presence, knew damn well that he’s still looking good without even trying. Just like right now, he wear a loose black t-shirt damped by water mixed his sweat, school uniform pants still hanging on him, and those brushed back damped hair while riding his surfboard.

“Say cheese!” One of your classmates push the camera shutter. Capturing the summer break moments before the new school year starts. You couldn’t help but pose for a few photos, until you didn’t realize Mingi pulled your hand. He mouthed you to follow him.

Obediently follow him, you started pedaling your bike behind his. He took you to a higher place than the shore. Stopping his bike, he look back waiting for you. Not too long, you stopped right beside him.

“We can get a better view here,” he smiled at you while his hand is pointing the sky.

You raised one of your eyebrow in confusion. He chuckled by your expression. Then he continued his words,

“I don’t know what you’ve going through. Somehow lately you seems.. different. I hope this will makes you better.”

Suddenly some loud bursts heard along the night sky decorated by the flickering light of fireworks. Leading you spontaneously looking up at it. It’s beautiful just like him. Like the light in the midst of a dark frantic mind. Even the fireworks weren’t enough to keep you entertained, you end up staring at him. Capturing the way how the smile carved onto his face.

“I like you Mingi,” you said it in a whisper.

You know it won’t be heard. You know that he belongs to someone else. And you know he appreciate you as a friend. At least this will ease your feelings even just a little.

⁠✧

The nights were getting colder. Both of you walked side by side while leading the bikes towards home. You talked to each other properly after a couple of months dealing with your antics, avoiding mingi by making some excuses whenever he came close to you.

You stop at the railway, he continue to lead his bike till the other side of railway. He gave you a small waved. You return it while looking at his back getting further away.

“Mingii! I hope we’re in the same class next year!” You yelled at him.

He looked back, raised his hand to give an ok sign from a distance.

3rd Year. Spring 2008

You rushed out from your class only 2 minutes before the class started, not in the mood to be a good and obedient student today. You’re gonna exploded in any minutes, home is in a mess and so does your head. Still hesitated skipping class at the library or leaving the school, you stopped your step right in front of the school gym door. Peeking through the window, you saw someone is dribbling the basketball.

You open the door slowly, decided to skip your class here. Startled by the sound he look into your direction. You thought there’s another students but none of them. It’s only him.

“Oh.. Mingi?” Yes that’s him, who you never talk to since those summer. Both of you only passed each other for a few times. Just saying hello and nothings more. Human can only wish, but fate said the otherwise. It all happened because you’re completely in different class.

“Hey, what’s up,” he greeted you back before tossing the ball towards you.

You catch it, slowly dribbling it towards his direction. He played along with you, a wide smile adorning his face. Trying to grab the ball before he asked you,

“How’s life?”

You almost tripped taken aback by his question.

“Um.. yeah.. great I guess,”

Finally you passed him through then you managed to shoot the ball. Mocking him, you jump out of the joy. He put a ‘Just watch, I can do better’ expression towards you. The squeak of shoes and laughter filled the gym. Both of you were playing in the joy, even you forget all of your tangled mind.

The least thing you ever wanted coming all of a sudden. You saw your teacher’s silhouette through the window. You quickly grabbed mingi’s hand and guide him to hide under the window hoping your teacher won’t notice. Both of you stayed still for a couple of minutes.

He checked if it safe already, then decided to leave the gym quietly while holding your hand. You both tried to stifle the laughter and keep walking only to find your teacher waiting for you at the corner. It ended by the punishment after such a long tired lecture. Mingi and you were on the knees side by side while raising both of your hand right in front of the gym.

“Sorry, we're busted,” he whispered to you.

“It’s not even your fault, please don’t blame yourself,” you mouthed back to him.

After quite some times, he looked at you with a mischievous smile. You're pretty sure he got some wicked plan. He gave the signal by counting down in whisper. You take steps, risking for everything he’ll do. On the last count you both ran away from your teacher hand in hand, giggling all the way.

3rd Year. Summer 2008

Everyone gathered, some of them were hugging each other with laughter, and some of them were crying in joy. Today is the graduation day. Right after the graduation ceremony you strolling around the school, trying to recall everything that was happen for 3 years you studied here.

Library was your best friend in your senior year. You swept the bookshelf with your palm as you walk pass through it. Opened one by one of your favorite books, before putting it back to the shelf. You leaned to the wall, closing your eyes. Last year of school is the roughest. Your parents divorced, you lose the desire to make some friends, leading you alone in the most of your times, and you lost him in some type of ways.

You saw him from the window. He’s friendly as he ever be. Talking and laughing with his friends. He never changed and so does your feelings. He always be the one you’ve crushed the most. But you know your place and never engaged those feelings. You wondered if you can talk to him for the last time.

Your 2nd year classmates waving at you. Shouting from the schoolyard under where the other students gathered including him,

“Heyyy!! Come here!” They keep calling your name with the smile on their face.

“Yeahh wait for me!” You shouting back at them as you hurriedly left the library going down through the stairs.

When you reach the schoolyard, you throw yourself at them. Hugging them in joy. Tears almost rolling down your eyes, you didn’t talk too much with them either for the last year. Even though you passed each other at school, you’ve been busy by your own problems that ended up distancing yourself from others.

Your classmates keep taking pictures, asking you to join them. They’re busy pulling in everyone whoever been the same class with them to take pictures together. As all of your classmates are almost gathered, you positioned yourself to take a group picture. Your shoulder bumped with someone accidentally.

“Oh sorry, I don’t mean to-”

“No problem,” his eyes widen before he smiled at you.

It’s Mingi. He’s standing next to you, joining as you do. You took a glance at him, he lose the second button of his uniform already. You shake your head, then you look into your friend’s camera, ready to take the group picture.

Before you left the group’s photo session, he pulled your hand as if he wanted to say something. The expression on his face was hard to read until he finally sighed and smiled at you.

“What?” waiting on his response.

“Nah, nothing. See you later princess.”

He pat your shoulder for the last time before he left you standing alone. Your tears fell without you realizing it. There’s no “later” for you. You won’t be here and you don’t know when you’ll be back. At the end you only murmuring to yourself.

“That should be my line silly.”

Summer 2023

“Babe I remind you once more, don’t forget about today reunion okie.”

You chuckled, betting that she’s already telling you for a hundred times this week.

“I promise you I’ll come. Don’t you hear me right now? You can guessed where I am.”

The sound of crashing waves and birds chirping is in the background. You walk along the beach while on the phone with your friend. You just return to this town full of memories early in the morning.

“Wha- what! why don’t you tell me when you arrived?”

“It’s not a surprised if I tell you sooner.”

Both of you talked animatedly for a while until you ended the call, assured her for the last time that you’ll come to the class reunion.

15 years since you left this town to a completely opposite province. Moved to your mother's hometown, helping her business after your graduation the aftermath of your parents divorced. You lose contact with everyone and ended up missed two reunions. But somehow last week an unknown number called you. That was your 2nd year classmate back in the high school, excitedly inform you that there will be a reunion soon.

⁠✧

The restaurant atmosphere is filled with laughter by your friends, reminiscing their memories when they were still in high school. They chatted with each other lively. Some of them enjoying the dish while chugging the beverages, and some of them are curious about you due to your disappearance without a trace for years.

An hour passed by the event started. A figure you didn't expect and missed appears. He slide open the restaurant door. The same wide smile adorned his face as he greeted the others. Unless he looks much more mature. Short black hair neatly styled with a few strands fell over his forehead, glasses hanging on the nose bridge, a silver necklace with a cross pendant dangle on his neck, button up white shirt that it’s sleeve rolled up almost touching his elbow finished with a black vest and pants perfectly fit on his body.

The smile slowly faded when his eyes fall into yours. A look of disbelief crossed on his face when he saw you here. He brushed away those expression immediately then took a seat in front of you. You two exchanged glances for a moment. You wanted to talk to him, but your voice hitched. Heavy feeling fills your heart, opening up the old memories that you thought were all over.

He tapped his fingers on the table looking a little nervous. Occasionally sipping his glass of beer to divert it. Without realizing it, your eyes fell on his ring finger. A white gold ring circled his finger sweetly. Somehow makes you feel a little relieved to open up a conversation.

“It’s been a long time Mingi.”

“Yeah, good to see you,” he took a deep breath before continuing his words.

“You’re… gone. Just disappeared without a single notice.”

“I went back to my hometown.”

“Why don’t you tell me before?” He showed you the same expression as the last time you saw him.

“It’s just so sudden, I’m sorry I couldn’t tell you”

He sighed for a second time,

“As long as you’re fine. That’s all.”

“I’m doing great. Thanks for your concern.”

You pat the back of his hand, assured him that you’re completely fine. He only replied you with a bitter smile.

“Listen.. listen! Guess what? I managed to print the damaged photo,” one of your friend raised a big photo album proudly.

“Why it seems like in every reunion you always got new photos for the same reason.” Chirped by the other friends.

“Shut up! You don't even know how difficult it is to repair an old damaged roll film,” she rolled her eyes.

She put the album to one of the tables before instruct them to take turns if they want to look at it.

“And.. this one for you.” She handed you a big brown postal envelope,

“everyone already got all of this photos. I don’t know why some of it are missing so others who likes taking pictures complete it, including him.” She pointed Mingi with her head.

“Ah.. thank you.” You received the envelope and looked at it carefully.

Meanwhile Mingi immersed on seeing the album. He turn the page one by one slowly. Sometimes he chuckles when seeing some funny moments. Until he noticed the page with unfamiliar photos.

Oh maybe this is the newly printed, he thought to himself. He always pays attention to you in every photos that was taken. Only to realized your eyes were always on him in almost every photos. He turned the page quickly to confirm that.

Before you open the brown envelope, Mingi tap your hand lightly.

“Can we talk outside? If you don’t mind.”

You nodding at him, proceed to follow him outside.

He took his glasses off, pressing the bridge of his nose with the thumb and index finger. Then he looked at you in miserable stare. You notice something doesn’t feel right.

“What’s wrong Mingi?”

He averted his eyes before pull out a wedding invitation to you. Stammering on his words,

“I’ll.. get married next month.”

It doesn't hurt that much when you receive it. You definitely expect it. However life still goes on doesn't it?

“Oh! Congratulation on your wedding. I hope you’ll enjoy your new life.” You tried to smile at him.

Clenched his jaw, he’s trying to suppress the frustration. He's been looking for you for almost 11 years. Until finally gave up in the last few years, and only to find you appeared at the class reunion unexpectedly.

“Is it easy to say that?”

You don’t quite understand what he really means,

“..isn't it easy as long as she's the love of your life?”

Lowered his head, reality just hits him back.

“Yeah.. Right..”

He pulled you into his arm tightly. You’re frozen by his sudden action, still trying to digest what was just happen. When you intended to let go, he told you his final request.

“Please let me hug you for the last time.. as a friend.”

⁠✧

Your eyes wandered out, sitting by the train window. It’s quite a long day, you take the last train after returning from the reunion. Can’t deny it, you feel ecstatic after meeting them.

Shifted your bag to grab the phone, your hand touched the brown envelope that was given to you earlier. You decided to pull it out from your bag, loosen up the strap to see it’s content.

You look at the photo by photo carefully. School festival, school trips, graduation day, and mostly summer breaks, everything’s stored well. Except one photo tucked in between has a contrast vibe.

The paper is duller and it was taken at night unlike the rest. You recognize it, that was your side portrait with fireworks in the night sky. You turn the photo over, there is the date and a small note written on it.

August xx, 2007

“The moon is beautiful, isn’t it my princess?”

Covered your mouth in disbelief. Tight feeling rises in your chest made you lose focus till some photos fell over the train floor. You pick them out one by one while looking at it.

Your eyes automatically on him by the photos. He always looks at you from a distance just like you did. The tears flowed unstoppably. All this time he also felt the same way. You hate him who always hide behind the word “Friend” as if he’s pushing you away. You closed your eyes, it's all too late now.

“I liked you too Mingi.”

Only the sound of train tracks was heard afterwards.

⁠✧

The friend label is a label I’m going to hate.

The feelings I’ve hidden still remain as a painful secret memory.

The photos that can’t define our relationship is a heartbreaking story.

Our story ended without even started.

- Goodbye Summer

a/n :

They used analog camera that contains film roll in it.

"He lose the second button of his uniform." That means he already gave it to someone who's supposed to be important (romantically) because it's located near the heart. People believed it's same as giving your heart to someone. Based on japanese students when it's graduation season.

Cutie patootie looks like this in the reunion, minus the tie.

"The moon is beautiful" is a popular japanese phrases 「月が綺麗ですね」 (Tsuki ga kirei desune). It means "I like you."

#song mingi #mingi x reader #ateez mingi #ateez fic #ateez x reader #ateez #mingi angst #ateez ff #kpop fanfic #ateez fanfic #ateez angst #mingi #shocymer

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itstheghostofmypast · 8 months ago

Note

MOOT GAME: " make up a trope for your moots and their biases. doesn’t need to be romantic. can be crackfic/funny/anything you want ^ㅇ(๑>◡<๑)ㅇ^ "

Okay- so, first of all, thank you so much Anon, for this ask and I'm sorry I responded to late, but I had to take my time with this one.😭💖.

So here it goes, (i know i said i'd do two biases, im sorry guys, i love yall too much and i get too invested the word count was killing me)

1) @edenesth

Park Seonghwa- Rivals to Lovers

Here me out, he owns an old book shop across the street, he's been there longer than you too. This was his turf, his town, his people, people who loved to read in his cozy library, with its olden print books, worn out pages, read through by generations of the same family.

All was great until one spring she shows up, with her whole pastel plus minimalistic vibes, all with the cutesy trinkets and plants, with warm lights- he noticed some books too, but they were only for show- in conclusion it was a horrid place.

A horrid place where most teens would go to after school now, no longer going to his bookshop, where they'd gossip, read novels or mangas, or even look at pretty pictured magazines (the safe kind, mind you he kept nothing nasty). What's worse was that the older folk began to go there, too! Especially because of how nice she was to them, so polite and so pretty and - ANNOYING.

He even went to 'inspect' the place, with a sour mood and an ill intention, though he was greeted with a burst of sweet aroma, one that had his stomach growling and his inner foodie, begging him to pick at least one of the many pastries or have a cup of steaming, delicious coffee. What came next was worst, her, with her gentle smile and angelic features.

"Hello! Welcome to Spring Avenue, how may we help you today?"

"You're taking my traffic."

"I'm sorry, I don't understand."

"Of course you don't."

With that he had walked out, starting a cold war, between the two. Ironically, she was a pacifist, never a fighter, but boy, did he piss her off, he knew all those buttons that would have her steaming like a hot latte.

The war had begun;

It all began when he put a " 10% off sign on Mangas, Fashion Magazines and Manhwas" that took a god chunk of her traffic.

In retaliation, she launched a "Friendship campaign, any customer that brings a friend gets a cake slice free."

Spend 2 hours reading here and leave with a borrowed book/novel of your choice."

"Buy a coffee and get a cookie free."

This continued throughout the season, so did their rivalry, to an extent that led their divided customers sense the tension. And like usual, highschoolers are escapists and this little feud of Seonghwa and her's was a problem they'd like to avoid, from her cafe they could see their beloved bookshop owner Seonghwa scowl at them, and if they were leaving the bookshop, the kids could feel the uneasiness in her smile that she give them once they'd pass her by.

"Congratulations, you're in loss." She sighed, closing the file, earning a scowl from the cafe owner, "Hey, I'm just here to check your bills, loss, and profit stuff, don't shoot the messenger."

"Alexia, come on." She whined, this was her dream, she'd put in her life's savings for this, "What should I do, Lexi?"

"Gosh, maybe not give out stupid discounts four times in a month?" Alexia sighed, rubbing her face, leaning back to stare at the bookshop across the street, "San said he knows the owner, maybe you guys could do a collab, instead of trying to each other's traffic."

"Who's San?" She asked her best friend, slash account manager and Public Relations officer- wait, was she dating!?

"Oh- uh- hey would you look at the time?" Alexia got up, grabbing her disposable coffee cup and bag, "Tell you what, you ask the bookshop owner dude about this? Okay? I'll get back with the details on Monday!" She called out as she walked towards the door, ignoring the cafe owner's questions about this San, "BYE LOVE YOU!"

That's how she found herself standing Infront of his bookshop that evening, still debating if she should go in or not? Was this idea even worth it, the guy was rude, annoying, stupid, incredibly handsome and sweet with kids and- the hell.

"Can I help you?" His deep voice came out of no where

She almost jumped out of her skin, only to turn around and spot the man she had been hating for the past ten months, standing there in all his angleic glory, with that ugly sweater and that overly comfortable scarf, not to mention his hair, his undercut had grown, quiet well too, perhaps he really was blessed with good genes.

"I uh..." she trailed off, pouting to herself, thinking of how he'd react, maybe he would make fun of her, or insult her or even go as far as to tell the town about her poor business management skills.

"Are you still open?" his question had caught her off guard, staring at him quietly wanting to see if this was a trick, only it wasn't, for when she nodded, he had looked around and then asked if he could...get a cup of coffee from there.

Of course she had said yes, why on earth would she say no to a customer, she needed the business. Unfortunately, that one cup of coffee, turned into two, then three, well- not as unfortunate as she would like it to be.

The two, mind you, who still didnt like each other, began to learn a lot about each other. He learnt how she was genuinely a sweet, caring and gentle person, her persona was indeed not fake but very real, this is who she was. She on the other hand, learned that he had inherited this business from his family, and he was an avid reader- sort a geek, a cute geek, a cute geek that could eat a whole chocolate cake with three mugs off coffee like it was nothing.

It wasn't until the third week of him visiting her cafe, that when he had stepped out to go there, he had bumped into her. She had almost fallen, but he was quick, gripping her wrist and pulling her into his chest, only to laugh when she mumbled an excuse, though he was glad she couldn't hear how his heart was hammering against his chest, wanting to stuff itself in the breast pocket of her coat.

That day she had asked him if she could check out his book shop, because she had been looking for old English bakery recipes and she couldn't find it anywhere, not any store around or online. Of course he had taken her to the right isle, in the right section in no time, this bookshop was his life and collecting and sifting through books was his passion, that day he had seen her passion, she had sat there, on the floor the entire night, reading book after book, mumbling to herself as she noted down recipes. He had sat next to her, helping her jot down notes, bringing her coffee- well not as good as hers, but good enough. At one point he had even ordered them a late night snack, well snacks, because he's a growing boy. He had closed the shop with the two inside, even pulled out a blanket and some cushions from the lounging area so she could comfortably work- she was a passionate girl and ironically he had realised something that night, only it turned into a full blown epiphany in the morning.

Next morning she had woken up right next to him, her head on his shoulder, his arm wrapped around her as the blanket was draped over the two, they had fallen asleep while reading- oh my, he really was pretty up close.

Though the two pretended nothing had happened, nothing had changed, however, everyone around them had noticed, the highschoolers would giggle when he'd come to her cafe for a cup of coffee, or how the older folk would pat him on the back when she'd step into the bookshop calling him out for help, with her little, "Hwa?"

Neither really knew how it happened, but one night while closing up he had waited outside for her, telling her he'd drop her home, even though she lived close by. Slowly this had become part of their routine, he'd often talk about the latest manga or an issue to the Star Wars comics or whatever on earth he'd talk about, but she'd always listen. Always smile and laugh at his jokes, while he'd readily accept any test recipes she'd try, telling her that his stomach was like a blackhole.

But when do the two get together? Simple, on New Years Eve, when he had to close his shop but she had decided to leave her cafe open, wanting to cater to all those who were celebrating the arrival of the new year with their loved ones, she knew Seonghwa had to go home anyway and she didn't want to spend the night alone since her family was out of town. What she did not expect was a few minutes before the strike of midnight, the cafe door chimed open as she turned to greet the customer, only to freeze at the sight before her- Seonghwa entering with a bouqet of origami flowers, smiling at her as he slowly walked to her;

"I- I know you don't like plucking flowers or bouqets, so I made you these."

"You...made these?"

"Ofcourse."

"W-why?"

"I...because I..." but before he could finish his sentence his ears picked up the count down, causing him to quickly place the flowers on the counter and as soon as the fireworks rang in her ears, it was as if she could feel the burning warmth in her body, taking a second to process how his lips were on hers, his hands cupping her face as her hands instinctively went up to grip his coat, pulling him even closer. Who knew that one day she'll end up opening a cafe that also served as a bookstore, who knew that one day, her little, evil, handsome rival bookseller, would be the New Year's kiss she never knew she needed, the man she never knew she needed, the lover that she was blessed to have.

2) @yessa-vie

Jeong Yunho- Neighbors to Lovers

No, she was not the new tenant, he was, and for some ungodly reason he was also extremely ill-prepared to live alone. Like any other weekend, she was leaving her apartment to go to the cafe to sit in peace and finish her novel, but God had other plans. She had opened the door to come face to face with a tall, good-looking man, though the smile he wore scared her- he was one of those extroverts.

No, he was not mean at all, nor was he the manipulative kind, Jeong Yunho really didn't know how the pre-installed dishwasher worked, that's why he had come to her that fateful weekend, about to knock on the door but she had beat him to it, opening the door before he could, earning a sheepish smile in return- who knew his neighbour would be so gorgeous, who knew purple could look so good on someone?

"Hey, I- I moved in across the hall, apartment 19, lol, I guess we're neighbours, huh?"

She had only nodded meekly at his question, pulling her satchel closer to her person, not because she didn't like him, no, but because she wasn't much of a talker anymore, not so confident either and also- because regardless of how good looking this stranger was, he was still a stranger.

"I'm Yunho- Sorry to bother you, I know you must be going somewhere, but I- I uh- I wanted to know if you know how to operate the dishwasher?"

That's how she found herself in his apartment, leaving the maindoor wide open, so she could escape if something were to happen, but to her surprise he was just a regular idiot, one who thought the dishwasher was a rack used to dry the dishes- men.

That night Yunho met an angel, one who seemingly had her life planned out, held together well, while he was still trying to build something out of his- data analyst or not, living alone was not the easiest thing to do, yet, she seemed so nonchalant about it.

Overtime however, she noticed how he would come over to ask her for help often, sometimes it was the 'fridge isn't working right' other times it was the 'how much water do you add to rice while boiling it?' Honestly, she would've told him to piss off if it were anyone else, but it was her polite neighbour, her sweet polite, new neighbour who would pass her by in the corridor every morning, smiling at her and wishing her a good morning- even if she wasn't a morning person.

Ironically, he continued to ensure they cross paths, only because he wanted to get to know her, to talk to her, he really needed a friend, and since moving here meant Mingi and him could no longer hang out 24/7, he really needed another person to talk to, someone who was not Hongjoong from the finance department.

Ironically, she did not protest or tell him to get lost, instead she's quietly help him whenever he'd approach her, giving him a shy smile then going back to her apartment. That purple door tempting him to go back and knock on the old wood, wanting to know what Narnia like secrets she hid behind.

She let it be, truthfully, she wanted fo befriended him, but during these little adventures, she realised she had begun to neglect her book, the same book she had a deadline for, the same book she had been working on day and night, and now this puppy pops up and takes all her attention?

So what does she do? Simple, she starts to create some form of distance, leave before he'd be awake, come back home later too, also even if he did come to knock on her purple door, she wouldn't be there to answer it, so technically she wouldn't feel guilty right?

Wrong, instead God had punished her with a severe writer's block, one so bad that she had missed two of her deadlines, and according to her publisher, she was on her last chance. That's how she found herself at the very cafe where she would find solace, now on the verge of tears, staring at the laptop in pure agony, maybe this was payback for leaving him unattended and ignoring him or maybe she was never meant to be a writer.

A fresh cup of coffee was placed next to her hand, causing her to quickly pull back and look at the stranger, only her panicked eyes met a softer, more timid gaze, a gentle smile gracing her presence.

"Hey... you looked like you needed the juice." He smiled, gesturing towards the chair, as if asking for permission to sit down next to her, to which she nodded.

"I uh..." she paused. Should she even be asking him how he's been? Does she have the right to do so, or are they just neighbours- well, at this point, two strangers living across each other.

"I read your books by the way," he began, giving her a gentle smile, as he felt the way she had tensed up, honestly, initially he thought she was like that because his presence made her uncomfortable, but he soon realised it wasn't him, but she usually was this tensed all the time, this nervous and unsure, which made no sense to him because she was one of the most well functioning person he had met in the city, and he was glad to have moved in next to her, "It's great, the plotline is amazing and the details- you really captured the essence, I particularly liked the world you created, honestly, when I moved here I thought everyone wore those 'blockers' too. To not...feel stuff you know," he turned to look at her, only to catch her staring at him, a small chuckle escaping him when she cleared her throat, averting her gaze, "You were the only one who was nice enough to help me, even for the stupidest of tasks...it means a lot."

She stared at him in awe and disbelief. She had been trying to avoid him for almost a month now, couldn't he tell? Or was he just playing dumb- I mean he totally could be dumb, he didn't know a toaster comes with settings, just thought the numbers were there for the appeal.

After that the two began to "spend time together", it was strictly casual mind you, nothing personal, though he would drop by more often than usual, sometimes after work, sometimes on the weekends- to have dinner with her, he'd bring dessert, or to watch a movie with her, he'd bring the snacks- no, nothing domestic at all.

Or so they thought, because a few months in, he had come over by swinging the door open, yes he had the keys and she had his keys, only to find her standing there all dressed up.

"Where are you off to? What about movie night?"

"Oh no..." she gasped, "Yuyu, I forgot to tell you I had a date tonight." A date? Why? With whom?

"Wait, why?"

"What do you mean why?"

"Why would you go on a date when we- I mean...isn't it weird? Shouldn't you be more focused on your book, instead of this temporary romance?"

"Temporary romance?!"

"W-wait, I didn't mean it like that. It came out wrong-"

"Out."

"W-what?"

"I said get out!"

That happened a week ago, she had been avoiding him for a whole week, she had been ignoring his calls, his texts, his knocks- no he didn't barge into her apartment, it took him a great amount of time to get her to open up to him and he idiotically clowned himself. So he decided to go to the next thing, go to the official reading of her book launch.

He waited there at the back, listening to her intently, taking in each word, who knew he would ever fall in love with, her neighbour, the same girl who had helped with the dishwasher, brought him dinner at night, spent time teaching him the usual ropes of living alone- who knew the very same girl had changed the plot of the book, basing it on her life, expressing how the shy, depressed protagonist, who thought dying her hair purple would make her feel better, realised that the only thing that would make her feel better would be a companion, a tall, handsome man, with a heart of gold- it was not that she needed a man, no, she just needed a friend, and she had finally found one, the inspiration to her writer's block, the Chandler to her Monica, the- HE DIES!?

He gasped, appalled at the way she had ended the story, where at the end, on his deathbed the man tells his beloved how she never needed him, but he needed her to function, to live through each day- bloody hell.

He waited for them to leave when he finally approached her, somewhat upset-no, he was very upset, as she stopped cleaning up to look at him, raising a questioning brow, "What?"

"I can't believe you!"

"Funny, Jeong, I should be the one saying that."

"What!? You killed me!?"

"What?"

"I come here to declare my undying love- no I come here to tell you how much you mean to me and apologise for never asking you out but getting upset when someone actually asked you out and you KILL ME IN YOUR NOVE?"

"First of all, I accept your apology, secondly, the protagonist was DEFINITELY NOT YOU, I made him up WAY BEFORE I met you."

"Oh..." he stared at her then looked around the almost empty bookshop, maybe he should just leave-

"So...Will you ask me out properly now or...'l"

"Move in with me."

"Too fast."

"Was worth a shot." He smiled when she let out a small laugh shaking her head at his antics, "Take me to dinner, Yunho." She smiled watching him lean closer then pause, as if asking for her permission, "Can I...?" His question was answered when she gripped him by the lapels of his coat, pulling him closer to crash her lips against his, smiling when he wrapped his arms around her, pulling back only to press his forehead against hers,

"We move into my apartment..."

"What? Mine's great-"

"Yunho, have you seen the window and the balcony on mine?"

"Your apartment it is boss."

3) @jaehunnyy

Choi San- Bestfriends to Lovers

Idiots, these two were complete idiots who were utterly in love with each other but were also too blind to realise that - why? Simple, because both feared that confessing to the other may ruin the long-held, deep bond.

A bond that had developed at the ripe age of childhood, middle school, to be more accurate. The day he had come to school, bored out of his mind, staring outside the window, wondering if he could jump on the closest tree to escape this prison. What he had not expected was an angel to come and sit beside him, well technically, the teacher had made her sit next to him, and he hadn't noticed her until she poked his shoulder lighter, causing him to jerk back and gasp, earning a few chuckles from the glass as the teacher just sighed in defeat.

"Wh-Hello."

"Do you need help with that?" She asked, pointing at the math equation in front of him. He looked at his notebook and remembered that's what they were supposed to me doing- damn that was a lot of daydreaming.

"Yeah, I guess...do you... know how to solve it?" He asked the new girl, too afraid to make eyecontact.

"Here, I'll show you." Turning to face him, she pulled his scribbled notebook closer.

"I'm San by the way."

That day onwards, a nice and quiet introvert at the back of the class finally began to crack open. From time to time, you'd hear him whispering to her, talking about some anime or a film. Often, he'd be telling her about his cat, Byeol, and how pretty she was. During break you wouldn't see San next to her for the first five minutes, no, he'd be sprinting across the campus,jumping down the stairs to go to the canteen to get her something to drink with her lunch, or a sweet snack, regardless of how many times she'd say 'it's fine.' During self study hours, she wouldn't be studying, no, she'd be busy tutoring her athletically gifted friend, he was...a little dumb, but that's okay, he was hardworking and she'd tell him she'd help him where he'd get stuck, explain and tutor where needed- especially in math.

As they grew older, he grew into his body, his self-esteem issues slowly subsiding, his feelings for her deepening, yet, never enough to tip the scale, at the bring of an edge but never enough to flow out he had to keep it all under control, because that's just how San was, patient and calm, he would never take a step if there was an ounce of the doubt when it came to how she felt about him. Though watching her spread her wings into the beauty she was, well, was somewhat problematic for him. Especially when she'd come to him, smiling like that, greeting him with the gentle voice of hers, asking him if he liked her haircut.

"What do you think?"

"It's...very nice."

"Just very nice?"

"You'd look pretty to me even if you were bald."

Conversations like these would have her heart hammering against her ribcage, and she'd pray to God that he couldn't hear it. She'd pray for it when he'd be walking home side by side, his shoulder bumping into hers, or his hand brushing against hers, when he'd take her bag from her, clicking his tongue at how heavy it would be,

"You trynna' build muscles like me?" He'd ask, though he was still very fragile, he'd only started going to the gym when he noticed how the 'basketball team captain', had decided to ask her to 'help tutor him too', though she had politely declined.

"Hmm? Of course not, Advanced Math books are just big like that..."

"Why do you do this to yourself, dove?" A nickname she had gained over the time, one used only by him.

"Because I wanna teach one day, I love teaching, I want to make sure people realise subjects aren't difficult or they aren't dumb, it's just that they're not taught properly."

Yup, he was smitten, on his knees, begging for her please ( he was also an idiot).

Ended up in college with her, though in a different major, like hell the now 'mountain of a man', no longer the kitten-like fragile boy, was going to major in math- business was a way better option.

This wasn't a bad situation, though they rarely had a few classes together, she'd still make time to see him, to text him as soon as class would end, but he'd already be standing at the exit, waiting for her with a coffee in hand and a dimpled smile, reserved just for her.

In no means was Choi San an extrovert, but somehow along the line he had met one, who later claimed that his MBTI had changed to an introvert too, though he doubted that notion- Jung Wooyoung.

Boistorous, noisy, obnoxious but a genuinely nice person at heart, Wooyoung was his companion in his major's classes, he was also the first person to know about San's little secret, since San trusted him enough to know, though Wooyoung assured him he had figured it out as soon as San introduced him to her as his "bestfriend".

"You're an idiot." Wooyoung snorted, taking off his shoes as he walked into the 4th years tiny apartment.

"What? Why?"

"You really think I didn't know?"

"How did you kno-'

"You can be bestfriends with a girl since childhood, unless a) one of you confessed to the other and got friendzoned but still chose friendship or b) neither of you confessed but are secretly crushing over the other."

"Wow, should've been a psychologist instead of a business major."

"What can I say, Sannie? I am a man of many talents."

Things progressed like this for a long time, Wooyoung watched from the sidelines how the two would basically act like a couple that was not a couple- almost everyone at campus thought they were a couple and Wooyoung was basically the third wheel. Not that he minded, and San appreciated him for that, he was glad Wooyoung's relationship with his dove was platonic- borderline sibling-like.

But Choi San was a fool, one that Choi San, at the fresh age of 25 wished that perhaps he'd be able to take the next steps, but something at the back of his mind held him back, were his personal desires as important as this friendship?

Which is why he stood there watching his best friend get ready for her date, her date with Wooyoung. After a conversation he did not like, but what could he say? He was too afraid to even confess, and well, Wooyoung wasn't a bad guy, and technically, he was his friend.

"I'm gonna ask her out, Sannie." The brunnet sighed, before taking a sip of his coffee, humming at the bitterness, perhaps this bitterness was sweeter than the bitter taste that had developed in San's mouth at the statement.

"W-why?" The bigger man with the fragile heart whispered.

"Because...I like her...I'm sorry but...I gave you time, so much of it and...I just wanted you to be the first one to know...if she says no, we'll all still be friends, but if she says yes...San, I won't hold back."

That had led to her first anniversary with Wooyoung, then the second and finally a day before their third anniversary San had texted the couple how he wouldn't be able to make it to their anniversary party because he had work that day and he wished them the best.

What he did not expect was someone knocking on his door at 2 am, opening the door to find a tear stained Wooyoung, only for him to punch the taller man in the face, watching him stumble backwards then wipe his eyes and sigh, "I swear- if you weren't such a great guy, I would've stabbed you."

"What the F*CK WOOYOUNG?"

That night was the first time he had seen Wooyoung cry, cry about how when she read the message she had become a mess, one that even Wooyoung couldn't fix, begging him for forgiveness how she made a mistake, how even though she was happy with Wooyoung, her heart belonged to someone else, someone who she thought she could move on from since he never confessed, since he never liked her back the way she did, and though the text was a confirmation of that, she couldn't bear lying to Wooyoung, to give him only half the love of what he deserved, knowing he deserved someone who would teach him the true meaning of love, because she was a teacher with only one student in mind, the idiot of a man- Choi San.

That night San couldn't sleep, not a wink, he processed the words over and over again, so did she like him? Should he confess to her? Now? Wouldn't that make it awkward? Or should he wait? Would that be a mistake?

Though his questions were answered in the morning when the doorbell rang at 7 am, making the sleepy man sigh as he stumbled to the door with blurry eyes, opening it still half asleep, only the slap he received woke sobered him up quickly,

"OW- WH- WHY ARE YOU JUST LIKE WOOYOUNG!?"

"SHUT UP! DONT TAKE HIS NAME! I HURT HIM BECAUSE OF YOU!" Never in the many years of knowing her, had she raised her voice like that.

"I-"

"NO! LISTEN TO ME!" She yelled before shoving him inside so she could continue yelling inside, "I like you- and you- you d*ck you could tell him you liked me but you couldn't tell me!? All those horrible dates you watched me go to, but you couldn't stop me?! You knew you liked me yet you let Woo ask me out!?"

"I- I didn't wanna ruin what we had..."

"San, I- what if I had married Woo? Huh? Then what? When you already had half my heart, I-"

She couldn't finish her sentence though, because the next thing she knew, he was smothering her with all that pent up love, his lips pressing against hers with a ferocity she had ever seen in her gentle Sannie, wanting to claim what he was too scared to touch before.

He only pulled back when she lightly pushed him back, gasping for air, looking up at him all flushed and pink, her swollen lips just enticing him even more,

"W-what was that?" She breathed out.

"Never say you're marrying anyone but me, I would've ruined the wedding even if it meant being thrown out."

"You're an idiot Sannie."

"No, I just had a teacher who could teach me math, but couldn't teach me how to love properly - guess she was learning too."

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angelstate · 2 years ago

Text

Why do you hide?

Peter parker x fem!reader

Genre: Fluff, Angst, Happy Ending! :)

Warnings: explicit trauma, low self-esteem, panic attack.

summary: being introverted usually made you end up alone in most things, people nowadays didn't put effort into relationships to actually stick around and get to know who you are. Everyone except Peter parker.

words: 2.9k!

this is my first ever post here so i'm sorry if is not really good. i hope you enjoy it!

it was normal by now, people ignoring your existence in the hallways, bumping into you and never stopping to say sorry. Still, it couldn't be described as bullying, nobody directly picked on you, called you names or made awful comments about how you looked. they just made no effort in pretending they weren't annoyed by your existence in the busy hallways.

even though you were an introverted, not even once in your life you acted as hostile as all the other kids were. what kind of people had been raising them that saying sorry was a punishment and not a common manner? It was ridiculous at some points.

For example, why wouldn't Jessica Williams say sorry when she accidentally hit you with her backpack the last Monday? you could never forgive yourself if you were the one to hit somebody on accident and didn't acknowledge the incident and apologies.

for children it's ok if they are embarrassed to say sorry or admit their mistakes since they are still learning manners but for a 16 year old girl to not be able to say sorry was worrying.

of course not all people in highschool were this dense and unfriendly but the once that were actually nice already had a lot of friends and it felt disrespectful to just go in the friend circle and demand to be accepted and befriended. it even felt selfish to want friends at all, even fake ones.

you parents always reminded you that most people present themselves with a fake persona so you should never trust them until they really star behaving in a realistic way and if people around you didn't felt inclined to acknowledge your existence that screamed a lot of who you are as a person.

and thanks to your situation at school it felt real your parents words. nobody was interested in the slightest about who you are so there was no point in trying to be friends with anybody.

then, Peter Parker came around and all the progress you had done into accepting that nobody wanted you around went to waste in a matter or days.

finally, after manifesting to the universe for someone to enter in your life and be able to understand your pain and why you were the way you are, peter showed up. with his super intelligence, dorky star wars t-shirts, pretty face, and awkward but charming personalty to crumble everything you knew about people because he was so nice.

actually, not just nice. he was warm like a ray of sunshine in spring, so calming and cozy that you feel like melting everytime he talks, every word he says just feels like one good secret that only the both of us knows or a promise that will last for eternity, there is no in between when it comes to peter parker.

everything about him was perfect but....you weren't.

you didn't have super intelligence, didn't like you apparrence even though you always made the effort to look good, and definitely weren't charming like him.

you are soft-spoken, introverted, shy and more simple in the way you expressed yourself.

you have to many layers, a thousand walls that try to protect the real you from getting hurt again by fake people who just wanted the benefits of being your friend, and it's ok. you need that safety but at the same time you only end up further isolating yourself and losing opportunities to grow because you prefer the comfort of being alone over the possibility of being a better version of yourself in a community.

_____________________

it had become a routine, stand in front of your locker and looking for what you needed for the next class and peter parker appearing next to you, ready to try and engage in some sort of conversation that you were always unprepared for.

"you know the movie Titanic?" he asked.

" yeah, i like that movie"

"i was reading the other day that almost all the love story is made up" he tilted his head to get a better look at your face.

you frowned.

"oh, that's...sad. i always thought it was a real love story of one of the survivors of the Titanic" you sighed.

"me too! whoever wrote that story is a genius." he laughed a little and took the books you pulled out of your locker from your hands

you closed the locker softly and turned your body to face peter completely, taking your books from him and smiling.

"it's a pretty good love story but i don't think is my favorite" you admitted.

Titanic is a good movie and the love story is great but not the type you prefer. 'Me Before You' that is the type of love story that absolutely captures your heart. it didn't have the happy ending you prayed for the entire movie and absolutely crushed your heart that Sam didn't changed his mind but it also added a cruel human aspect that made your heart feel warm.

"Titanic is great!" Peter argued

"i agree but there are better movies out there" you argued back

"like which one?" He questioned

"Me before You is great" you responded

"i haven't watched it" peter frowned and crossed his arms.

"you should, it's amazing." you smiled once again and began walking towards your next class, peter followed you immediately since it was one of the classes you shared. Algebra.

"we could watch it together, i mean if you want to watch it with me, you don't have to i just wanted to know if you'd like to watch it with me" he stuttered and panicked slightly.

"i would love to, we could watch it tomorrow"

"yeah, that would be great" peter answered quickly.

you already knew where peter lived, this was going to be good, right?

_____________________

yeah....it was too god to be true.

those were the words that kept repeating in your mind and were the same words your mom said when she reacted to the news of you finally beginning to be friends with someone that was actually a good person.

"it's too good to be true, kid" your mother spoke without even looking at you, too busy preparing herself something to eat. the smell of alcohol still lingering in her skin and hair. you doubt a shower wold be able to get rid of it, it was her signature smell after all, even if she didn't want to admit it.

"peter is my friend, mom." you explained with desperation in your voice, wanting your mother feel happy for you once in her life. it was so hard to prove her that your social life wasn't all tragic but also good and promising thanks to peter.

"you sure? I don't want to come to me crying if he turns out to be like Sarah"

...

you froze in your spot, your mom was aware of how much you have avoided the topic of Sarah. How she created a new world of pain just for you to suffer when she pretend to be your friend because how much of a people pleaser you are. that's why she didn't felt the need to question your motives when you beg to go to a different high school.

nobody in your family knew the things Sarah manipulated you into doing, of course your mom was aware Sarah was a trouble maker, that was what she was so known for, what she didn't know is the trouble she forced on you.

smoking was bad, drinking too but that didn't compare to all the 'rituals' and 'tests' she made you do to prove loyalty to her. To prove that if she ever got caught doing something bad you would have her back and lie her wait out of the situation.

it would be an understatement to say that you were naive, the second your mother knew about the things sarah did to you she didn't hesitate to call you all names existing for stupid and that memory never went away.

finally after almost 2 minutes of silence you spoke again, voice trembling and out of breath.

"he isn't like Sarah, he is like me"

"that's worse."

that's worse? i am worse?

"how is that worse? I'm a good kid"

you mom laughed hard, and for the first time looked at you. it was evident in her eyes how she wasn't taking you seriously in the slightest, it was so clear she didn't gave a fuck about this that it was painful to watch her enjoy your pain so much. she was so joyed about mocking you and the one optimistic thought you had in months that she couldn't contain her excitement in shutting it down immediately

"a good kid? if anything your a pain in my ass. If that kid is as stupid as you are then god helps his family because i certainly need gods help when dealing with your dumbass"

how cruel of her to speak like that about you, the kid how always kept quiet, that did everything she was asked for even if it wasn't convenient for you to do so. the one that made sure she passed out in her bed instead of the floor every time she drank too much.

she was mean and bitter about your existence when she should be joyed about your upbringing. the worst mother.

"you don't have to be so mean" you whimpered, the knot that began to form in your throat made it hard to breath and the tears that were leaving your eyes so softly began to feel overwhelming, just like your sweater and pants. It felt like you were overflowing with so much emotions of distress that your body was trying to escape from itself.

without waiting for her answer you went to your room and locked the door, everything felt so suffocating. Your clothes all of a sudden felt tight and uncomfortable, but your hands began shaking too much to be able to take any piece of clothing off and the open window didn't seem to let enter any air inside the room.

This was a nightmare in real life.

The panic attack was ripping you apart and all you could do was to sit in the hard wood floor and sob uncontrollably and feel the way your heart seem to be going even faster every passing second.

but someone saw you and got worried about you.

_____________________

a few days later

how could you face him? how even dare you face him after everything that happened with your mom? Obviously peter didn't know what happened but the incident was in your mind and it had infested every corner of it. it was impossible to ignore the fresh memory or get out of the state of shame you were on.

After laying awake all this nights you came to the 'realization' that whatever you had going on with Peter wouldn't work.

He isn't like you and you made a mistake saying he was to your mom. He is so much more, so much better that saying that you were like him felt like one of the worsts sins you ever committed.

Once again, how dare you come close to a good person just because you were lonely? you didn't want to go close ever again or face him in any kind of way, not even with pictures.

so you did what any coward would do, you began hiding.

at first it was easy, just keep every book you need in your backpack so you never need to go to your locker. But then your back started to hurt, a lot.

So you created another plan, hide in the bathroom and wait till its almost time for your classes run to your locker and arrive late to class, at least the ones you didn't have with Peter.

In those you had to get more creative, you started to use a big scarf that covered almost half of your face and using big hoodies to hide the rest of your face, since it was winter the outfit was according and almost all the other girls were doing the same things.

it didn't hide you completely but that was the best you could do to at least hide a little bit. it felt pathetic most of the time but the shame kept you from stopping.

peter wasn't an idiot though. he noticed, first when you didn't showed up at his house to watch the movie and later on that night when he watched you have a panic attack in your room when we went to check up on you as Spiderman.

he knew something must have happened and was planning on speaking with you about it the next day but you didn't went to school for days and when you finally appeared you didn't give any opportunity for peter to talk to you

it was like you had turned into a ghost, peter rarely saw you in the hallways and you always seem to arrive to your shared classes with everybody else to hide your silhouette from him.

but one day you didn't hide good enough...

_____________________

you were in the library almost nobody came here in lunch so it was the perfect hiding place, you were reading one of the harry potter books that the librarian had in her desk and kindly let you borrow.

being a fan of the books you directly began to read in one after sitting in one of the tables that were hide by bookshelf's it was so peaceful, too peaceful to be exact and you didn't realize until it was too late.

until peter parker was already standing in front of you, at the other side of the table looking at you with mixed emotions and a blank expression.

"here have you been?" he questioned you the moment you looked at him. his tone was harsh but also full of pain

"here." you answered softly, it was barely a whisper but peter heard you loud and clear.

"i don't mean today, i'm talking about this week. where have you been?" he questioned you again this time in a softer tone.

"at school, i've been busy with stuff" you broke eye contact and looked at the table in shame.

"but you haven't gone to you locker at any point"

"i have"

"when."

"after the bell rings" you admitted.

"why? i mean you'd end up being late to class if you do that"

"i know"

"what happened? did i made you mad or something? if i did i'm sorry i swear it wan't my intention and i'd like to make up for it." he spoke i desperation, the same way you did to your mother and that made your heart clench in pain.

"you didn't do anything wrong, peter" you sighed and covered you face with your hands in stress

"then why do you hide?

shame. you wanted to scream but something inside of you just wouldn't let you speak, it was everything too embarrassing, the fight with your mom, your obvious attempts into avoiding peter, getting caught by him and being confronted about it.

taking a deep breath, you uncovered your face and looked at peter with your best 'sorry' face and just explained your thoughts to him the best you could.

"i just...i don't think you and me are compatible. you're a genius and a just amazing in general and i'm well me. your out of my league in so many way that i can't understand why do you even talk to me half of the time. i don't know even half the things you do and even when i do know some of them, you have much more knowledge about it so you have no logical reason to be close with some one so stupid like me"

"that not true"

" it is, peter. and it's not even abut you being intelligent. it's about me not being it; not being any good to you or anyone in general. i am dumb, stupid, idiotic and foolish. i am empty. not even my interest are interesting enough and the worst thing is that can't never find it in me to just try and be more likeable "

"you are likeable, i like you. that's why i'm always talking to you and around you every chance i have"

you looked at him wide eyed and watch as he processed what he said. his expression filled with panic and before he could even explain himself you were already speaking

"do you mean it?"

"what..well i mean, you know i...uhm i guess what i'm trying to say is that....yeah i mean it but you don't have to feel the same i mean i totally get why you would not want to be with me is just... let's pretend this never happened"

"i like you too" you spoke softly and felt your face blush profusely. this felt like a dream, peter parker could not be in love with you. is too good to be true. everything with him felt too good to be true.

"you do?" peter said with a hopeful tone, his eyes are shinning with adoration and relief from not being rejected by the girl he loved so deeply

"i do"

he basically rushed to your side, picked you up and kissed you with passion and love that it took everything in you to separate yourself when you ran out of breath.

peter parker loved you, there was no point in hide yourself anymore. and if he was too good to be true then it was meant to mae you just as great being by his side.

"i love you" you both whispered at the same time.

#peter parker x reader #peter parker fic #peter parker #spiderman #peter parker x fem!reader #peter parker fluff #tom holland #tom holland spiderman

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