#and now here we are 7 years later and i’m autistic and my special interest has been cetaceans and marine biology pm my whole life

[folkshroom]

hey wlw/nblw of tumblr who was the minor/low scale influencer u imprinted on as a tween/early teen that u molded ur personality after until they dropped off the face of the planet or faded into obscurity (aka grew out of it)

[drummergirl231-2]

Happy Autism Awareness/Acceptance Day 2020!

To me, true awareness and acceptance go hand-in-hand. I still don’t mind the word “awareness,” since most people, even people who think they’re spreading Autism awareness, aren’t totally aware of what it is or what it’s like. But I also love calling it Autism Acceptance Day, because that’s what we need more than anything. 

To spread some awareness, I’d like to address some misconceptions about Autism and share some other thoughts I wish people knew/understood.

1. Autists/Aspies do not lack empathy. 

I found this thing and it explains it super well so I’ll just leave it here:

Imagine a scenario where you say something totally innocent and it triggers the person you’re talking to. They start flying off the handle at you and you don’t know why. But because they’re angry, you are, too. But since you don’t know why they’re angry, you don’t know why you’re angry, either. It’s crazy overwhelming and confusing. And you want to fix whatever you did because you don’t want this other person to be angry or hurt, but you don’t know how, because their all-consuming rage makes it really hard to think and try to put yourself in their shoes. Also, you’re scared on top of it all.

That’s what having high affective and compassionate empathy and low cognitive empathy is like. It’s not that we don’t care. It’s that we care too much, and all the super specific nuances of socializing are things we have to learn one at a time, through either our mistakes or others’ mistakes. These things don’t come naturally to us, but it’s not like we can’t learn. If I were to compare math to socializing, it’s like you all have calculators or other doohickeys to do all the math for you and we just have paper and a pencil... and no eraser. 

2. Autism is not a mental illness to be “cured.”

Now don’t get me wrong, I am ALL FOR people finding ways to help us be able to deal with the world better, whether that’s a better diet, items to block out sensory stimuli or items that stimulate, or counselling that can help us navigate social situations and talk through anxiety and/or depression. But those things don’t “cure,” us because Autism isn’t a disease or something wrong with us. Autism gives us different challenges, sure, but neutotypicals have their own challenges. 

The symptoms typically associated with “low-functioning,” Autism don’t necessarily have to be a part of Autism. Many non-verbal kids grow up to be verbal. That doesn’t mean they stopped being autistic. There was a celebrity mom years ago who claimed to “cure” her son’s Autism with a gluten-free dairy-free diet. He’d been so trapped in his head, he couldn’t engage with the world around him. She altered his diet and one day he laughed at Spongebob, and that was a turning point. He became able to interact with people and react to things on TV. It was a huge breakthrough. But he was still autistic. If you were to have plopped me down on a rug as a toddler next to a toddler like this celebrity’s son before his altered diet, you wouldn’t think I was autistic at all by comparison. But I was, and I am.

Autism is a different neurological blueprint, and yes, brain-healthy diets and detoxes can do wonders for us because it seems like our brain type does make us more susceptible to negative effects from neurotoxins. But if you think someone has lost their Autism just because “the bad parts,” went away... no. That’s not how it works.

3. Not everyone is “a little autistic.” 

When I was newly diagnosed and trying to process it, someone told me something along the lines of, there there, we’re all a little autistic. But that’s not true. There are a lot of traits associated with this brain type, and yes, a neurotypical person can have a few of them. That doesn’t make them a little autistic. To be considered autistic at all, you’d have to have a large number of quirks plus social delays (not associated with excessive technology use), odd or repetitive behaviors, unusual and intense interests, communication struggles, and unusual sensory processing. Suppose you’re white. If you are white, this should be easy to imagine. Say an African American just told you about some of the challenges they’ve faced, whether it’s race-based bullying in school or racial profiling later on. Would it be appropriate to say, “There there, we’re all a little black?” NO. One, it’s false. Two, while all people struggle with stuff because to be human is to struggle sometimes, the struggles of different groups of people are totally different, and you can’t say you know exactly what it’s like or pretend everyone’s the same. We all have equal dignity and worth, but beyond that, everyone’s different. Don’t pretend differences don’t exist. Just value them.

4. Autism doesn’t have a “look.”

When I tell people I’m autistic, this is usually what I hear: “Wow! I wouldn’t have guessed! You don’t look autistic.”  ...What does that even mean??? Is it supposed to be a compliment? Because if it’s a compliment I “don’t look autistic,” then that’s kind of an insult to other autistic people. Or do they mean it like, “I don’t believe you’re really autistic because I have a preconceived idea of what an autistic person looks like and you don’t fit the bill so I’m not going to give you grace if you act weird?” I don’t know. Y’all say weird things too, sometimes, ya know? But Autism doesn’t have a look. There is a sort of distant intensity in our gaze sometimes... and I can legit see it when Jim Parsons plays Sheldon Cooper, but when I see an interview with him as himself, it’s gone. It’s not a fixed feature of our faces, and a talented NT could totally put it on.

5. Autism presents itself differently in boys and girls.

You know how not a lot of people know the symptoms of heart attacks in women because mainly people only talk about what a heart attack is like for men? It’s kinda like that with Autism, too. Typically when you hear about Autism, you’re hearing about the signs and symptoms in boys. Even most pediatricians only know to look for the way it presents in boys, which is how so many girls don’t get a diagnosis until later in life, if ever.  One difference is that, for whatever reason, girls tend to be better at nonverbal communication and taking hints. We’re mimics. Chameleons. We take on the mannerisms of those around us and who we see on TV as we force ourselves to adapt. Verbal boys might speak at unusual volumes or with an unusual voice, rhythm, or cadence, but verbal girls learn to mimic the speech patterns of others. Our special interests/obsessions aren’t typically seen as strange given our age and sex. For example, a six-year-old autistic boy might be fascinated by WWII. I was interested in fetal development. People thought, “What’s so weird about that? She’s a little girl who loves babies.” We often play with Barbies or other dolls long after our peers have stopped. It helps autistic girls process social situations. When I was shamed out of liking Barbies, I started writing stories in notebooks or in my head. Autistic boys usually struggle with social communication from an early age, but autistic girls usually don’t have any major communication struggles until adolescence, when relationships, platonic or romantic, get way more complicated.  Since little autistic girls can mimic their neurotypical peers, and since some doctors only know how to look for Autism in boys, we tend to fly under the radar, causing that huge gender gap in diagnoses.

6. Mental illness is common with Autism, but NOT part of it.

I read an article by an autist in the UK who struggles to get help for his anxiety or depression because therapists have brushed him off, saying “Well, that’s just part of being Autistic, so it can’t be helped.” NO! Just like neurotypicals can be mentally healthy or unhealthy, Autistic people can be mentally healthy or unhealthy. Just because something is common for us doesn’t mean it’s how it’s supposed to be, or that it’ll always be that way, or that it’s part of who we are and we need to embrace it. People with mental illnesses should be embraced (literally or figuratively, depending on what they’re comfortable with). Mental illnesses should not be embraced. Ever. Because autistic kids and adults often face abuse, bullying, discrimination, and are ostracized, anxiety (especially social anxiety) and depression are common for us. In more serious cases, especially in autistic teens and young adults, dissociative disorders can develop. What’s worse, it doesn’t take much looking to find the dark corners of the internet where people, autistic or not, are encouraged to embrace their developing dissociative thoughts and feelings. I once saw an interview with someone who found healing from a dissociative disorder, and she gets emails every day from others with the same disorder she had who regret some of the things they were talked into doing while living with the condition and  who want to find the healing she did. She said many of them are autistic and under the age of twenty-five. Autistic people with mental illnesses shouldn’t be talked into believing their mental illnesses are a part of them, or not mental illnesses at all, or something to celebrate and cling to. I reject the notion we should have to settle for being ill in any way. We deserve to be as healthy and whole as anyone else, and it makes me sick there are so many internet predators preying on us in this way, and that there are therapists who think Autism and mental illness has to be a packaged deal.

7. If LGBT people were treated the way autistic people are by the media, it’d lead to outrage. But it seems like no one is outraged on our behalf.

We’ve seen the news stories, haven’t we? A couple invites the news over to their house, upsetting their autistic child who then has a meltdown, the meltdown is filmed and aired, and the parents are just like, “This is what our life is like because of Autism. And it sucks. Pity us.”

There was one video I saw... I’m just so enraged by it, even after two years. A mother was praised for her open honesty as she vilified her autistic son and complained about how he ruined her life and how hard it is to go out and have people stare. I’m sorry, hard for WHO??? I don’t even want to go into the details. I know only sharing this much doesn’t make it sound like that bad of a video, it’s just... ugh. Guys. It’d be a whole separate post. I can’t deal with it right now. 

If parents went on the news after their kid came out to them as gay, and wept and begged for pity and said some of the things this woman said of her autistic son (wondering what she did wrong that made her deserve this or that led to this or saying she doesn’t believe in God but finds herself praying anyway that God’ll “fix him”), America would call them the worst parents ever. But parents of autistic kids who do this are praised for their openness and vulnerability as they publicly shame their child.

Another time, after a mass shooting carried out by a teenage boy, the news reported that he was autistic and that might have contributed to the attack (there they go, combining mental illness with Autism as one and the same again).

If a pedophile were arrested, and they said on the news, “And we just got word that he’s gay, so that may be why,” there’d be a riot. But the news can pin autists as mass murderers and no one bats an eye!

All of May last year working at a clothing store, I watched as various departments filled up with pride t-shirts to get ready for June, and I couldn’t help but think,

Where were the Autism acceptance t-shirts in March to get ready for April?

I probably shouldn’t be so surprised with the media painting us as life-ruiners and life-enders. 

I know it’s a vile and disgusting thing for me to be jealous of LGBT people in this way, especially since they have their own struggles, too. I just wish society had our backs and celebrated us instead of wanting us “fixed,” for their own convenience, ya know?

8. Almost all of us hate Autism Speaks, and those who don’t are probably just new. XD

I used to be all “Light it up blue!” as well (even though that seemed weird to me, given blue lights might be overwhelming to some people on the spectrum). But then I read something on their site that made me feel really betrayed, and down the line, I learned most autistic people hate them... some because they saw them say the opposite of what I saw they said. Basically we all have different opinions but Autism Speaks spouts whatever information their donors want them to (sellouts), and that donated money doesn’t go towards helping us, but toward more fundraising or research on how to prevent people with our brain type. I guess they’re not fond of the artistic and scientific advancements we bring to the table. They should change those puzzle pieces from blue or multi-colored to white with black specks because they want a world that’s vanilla. 

9. Some of us still like the puzzle pieces, even if we hate Autism Speaks.

I’ve talked about this in a fanfic, but I’d love it if we could redeem the puzzle pieces, because they’re still a good analogy if you assign a different meaning. Autists and NTs are puzzling to each other, no sense denying that, but the more time we spend together, the more we start to understand each other. Also, Autism does have a lot of pieces, and figuring out I was autistic was like solving the puzzle of my life. The missing pieces came together and things became clearer and made more sense. Also also, some autistic people are really good at puzzles. And then there are autists like me who aren’t necessarily good at puzzles, but get totally absorbed in working on them anyway (my parents have been doing some puzzles during the quarantine lol they’re traps! TRAPS I SAY!!!).

Nevertheless, I understand why other autistis don’t like the puzzle pieces and prefer the rainbow infinity symbol, and I quite like it, too. It’s very pretty, and the way the colors fade together is a nice symbol of how it’s a spectrum.

It’s a sign of the infinite possibilities in our lives when we’re empowered, because we can do and have done good and great things in the world.

[rebelscum-2187]

So after nearly 22 years of life on this planet, I’ve come to the conclusion that I am high functioning autistic. I believe I fell through the cracks of an early diagnosis for the following reasons:

1.) I am Female (I learned how to mask myself very early on)

2.) I have a gifted IQ (above 130) and was classified as such in 4th grade so no one considered that I could be both ASD and intellectually gifted.

I am in the beginning stages of unmasking and am currently seeking an official diagnosis. Right now, I’m trying to write down everything I know about my neurodivergent experience so here’s a list of things I’ve experienced and believe to be relevant. If you can relate or you understand please comment and share! I’m new to this community and it feels so good to finally meet people who understand and can relate. Ok, Here we go.

“So the general population doesn’t memorize scripts to movies or watch the same one every day for a year?”

“People think it’s weird that I prefer to have subtitles on when I watch stuff, even though I don’t have damaged hearing”

“I watch movies with subtitles because I won’t understand what’s said if I don’t read it. I have no hearing issues.”

“I cannot hear/understand someone if I have one ear bud in and one out. Too much sensory input at once.”

“I thought I had a hearing deficit because I literally could not understand people at church or parties or other places with a lot of background noise, and I was so confused when they told me my hearing was normal.”

“I love star wars. Not just love but I could tell you what planet each character is from and what kind of ship they use, what model droid that one is and I will gladly talk about it all day if you let me. Everyone now gets me Star Wars stuff for my birthday and holidays”

“Eye contact is so uncomfortable for me that sometimes it ‘burns’ to maintain it, but then I overcompensate and stare too intensely. Over the years, being female, I’ve forced myself to make eye contact for a certain number of seconds and then look away a certain number of seconds but I’m concentrating so hard on that, that I don’t remember anything that was said to me.”

“Giving me verbal directions is a special kind of hell. I need it written down.”

“I can memorize pictures of things and exactly where every kid sat in my 10th grade US history class as well as my 9th grade geometry class.”

“I never fit in anywhere, in my childhood, most of my adolescence, except the swim team and my new church.”

“Team sports are the worst. I can’t communicate fast enough, I’m bad with hand eye coordination and keeping track of a ball. I excelled in individual sports and fell in love with swimming.”

“I often found it much easier to make friends with older kids because I could have intelligent conversations with them and their good social skills could make up for my lack of social skills.”

“But, I had a few friends that were considerably younger who I could still play imaginatively with dolls when I was 13 and one particular friend was 9. I had a lot of trouble getting a long with her sister who was the same age as me.”

“It physically pains me to hear someone mispronounce a word, spell something wrong, or make a grammatical mistake. I corrected my cousin A LOT when we were kids, she frequently got mad and I couldn’t understand why. My grandma would tell me to stop because correcting people is rude.”

“One of my special interests as a kid was dolphins. I was 5-6 years old and I remember being so excited when my mom let me check out like 10 books from the library and I read them quickly and multiple times.”

“I corrected a teacher one time about dolphins. She said dolphins weren’t whales and I knew FOR A FACT that ‘dolphins were a type of small whale’ because I read it in one of my books. She laughed at me and so did the rest of the class and I felt stupid even though I was right. This led to me suppressing my knowledge and real self and ultimately more masking.”

“As per that last one, my memory is impeccable.”

“I had another special interest in dogs when I got a bit older. My mom bought me a book with every kind of breed of dog, where they came from, their temperament, their size, everything. I can still, to this day, tell you the breed of dog just by looking at it.”

“I always wanted a best friend but never had one. I had groups of friends but never someone who would call me their best friend. When I got a boyfriend in high school, I was so excited because he called me his best friend and he was mine and I finally had that feeling reciprocated. He also had a gifted IQ and dyslexia, ADHD and a few other things so we understood each other quite well.”

“I can’t tell if someone is flirting with me because I can’t read between the lines. I also don’t know how to flirt because if I like a guy too much I get soooo nervous and I stumble over my words and it’s a disaster.”

“When I liked this guy (last year, 2019) I would freeze up so bad when I talked to him that I rehearsed every conversation I wanted to have with him so I wouldn’t mess it up. I would write topics in the notes section of my phone before hanging out with him so I’d remember what to ask him. It made for very awkward and forced conversations and probably drove him away.”

“Sarcasm and jokes almost always go over my head. The boyfriend I had in high school was very funny and outgoing but used a lot of sarcasm and it always caused disagreements because I took him seriously when he was being sarcastic.”

“I talk slowly and very monotone.”

“I have no difficulty reading in my head and can read/comprehend it well, but reading aloud is difficult and I often stumble over words and mess up.”

“I need directions repeated multiple times before I understand.”

“I went to the beach to hang out with some church friends yesterday. They all play spike ball and are so confused as to why I sit there and don’t play. I’ve tried playing spike ball but it involves way too much hand eye coordination and I’m so bad at it that it’s embarrassing. So I don’t play.”

“That same night, a group of them said ‘let’s play uno!’ And I was so happy to play something familiar that didn’t involve a lot of coordination. Then they said ‘we’re playing SPICY uno, right?’ And immediately my heart sank because I knew they were playing a different way that I wasn’t familiar with. Again, receiving verbal directions was hell and I didn’t understand it. I was so bad at it and wasn’t getting it, and in the middle of the game I had the urge to cry. I wanted to cry because I couldn’t even get this right. I suppressed the urge, of course, so they wouldn’t think I was even more weird than the already suspected. Another group of people that I wouldn’t fit in with.”

“Making friends has always been so difficult. Once I make a good friend I hang on to them for as long as possible even if they’re not very nice because I’m scared I’ll have to make a new one if I lose them. And we all know how hard making new friends is for me.”

“I’m a perfectionist. Especially with my art projects. When I took a painting class I realized I do it the wrong way. You’re supposed to paint layer by layer over the entire canvas and focus on small details at the very end. I work on one small area at a time and do small details too soon. I often spend way too much time on small details before I realize that the larger shape of the object isn’t proportionate and then it’s too late.”

“I won’t even attempt tasks if I know I can’t do them perfectly.”

“I have perfect pitch. I don’t know if that has anything to do with autism or that I just started music lessons when I was young. I can tune instruments perfectly without a tuner or reference note and I never understood why my orchestra teacher had me play the A key on the piano over and over again while she walked around and tuned everyone’s instruments when I could do it without any reference. I can hear it in my head.”

“When my parents got me a keyboard at age 7-8, they were impressed because I could sit down, without listening to any song and find the notes of a song I liked by ear. I still do that today but my piano is very out of tune and it bothers me.”

“Autistic boys tend to isolate and not care about concealing their stims or weird behavior but girls don’t. I am a ‘loner’ and always have been but I want so badly to belong and have friends and socialize, but I’ve always been so bad at it that I strike out every time. I often drink at social gatherings because it helps me loosen up and talk more freely. I guess it helps me lose the mask for a while.”

“I HATE people touching me. I’ve always hated it and still hate it to this day unless it’s someone I’m super comfortable with. I’ve been told I have the ‘dead fish hand shake’ and I’m an awkward hugger. My friend picked me up from behind and carried me for a few seconds because we were all goofing off and having fun but afterwards I was so mad at him I got really quiet and didn’t talk for a while. I told him later on the ride home that if he did that again I would slap him. “

“Everyone thinks it’s weird that I don’t like touching people, and some of my friends who also don’t like touching people were abused and I always thought, ‘there had to be a reason, maybe I was abused as a kid and repressed it.’ It’s been so long and I’ve finally realized that maybe it’s just because I have Aspergers or ASD. “

“When I make sarcastic remarks or jokes I often have to clarify because I say them in such a monotone way that people think I’m serious.”

“I’ve always joked that I’m just really clumsy and uncoordinated, and chalked it up to being tall and lanky. That’s why swimming was the perfect sport for me. Little to no risk of injury and not much hand eye coordination needed to be good at it. Just hours of practice, technique and endurance.”

“I also injure myself quite a lot because I’m ‘a klutz.’”

“Stims: I scratch my head and then smell my fingers and I will do this for hours if I am able (I know that one is weird so I only do it at home) popping my knuckles a ridiculous amount of times when I feel uncomfortable and don’t know what to do with my hands. I twirl my hair constantly (that one is pretty socially acceptable so I do it in class nonstop). I tap my foot or bounce my leg, I make weird facial expressions and forget to hide those. People notice but they often think it’s funny because I’ll make a face if someone says something dumb and make an expression that people seem to relate to. I scrunch my nose if I’m uncomfortable or just whenever.”

Special interests: Star Wars, Disney (I know every word to every Disney song and I watch animated Disney movies over and over again, like literally every night) dolphins, the ocean, dogs, theology/the Bible.

“With my art work, and other things, I will get so focused on a painting that I will work non stop for 8-9 hours (all day basically) and not eat because I’m so focused that I forget to eat.”

“I think I slur my words a lot and sometimes my friends will laugh and be like ‘did you just say ____.?!?!’And I’ll clarify and they will continue laughing and say ‘oh it sounded like you said this.’ I hate when that happens.”

“Loud noises really bother me. I jump if I hear an unexpected loud noise and I hate people yelling, even if it’s not directed at me, it makes me want to cry. “

“I loved the color blue so much as a kid (I still do) but my entire wardrobe was basically different shades of blue t-shirts. I also only ever wore baggy t-shirts and baggy cargo shorts (I kinda dressed like a boy) because it was comfortable and I didn’t like getting comments if I looked “cute today”. I hated the attention. I also never ever wore my hair down to school. It always had to be up in a tight pony tail. I still don’t like my hair being in my face to this day and wear it up almost every day.”

“The other day, I was hanging out with a friend and she was trying to tell a story but I kept getting distracted and interrupting her. She said, ‘Emily, you kind of interrupt people a lot.’ At first I was hurt, but then I realized it’s not entirely my fault and it’s an autistic thing.”

“I mask so much that I have rehearsed responses to social interactions and will often get so nervous or start speaking from the script before I realize I’ve said the wrong response. Of course I’ll think about it all day after that and think of ‘well great, so and so thinks I’m weird now.’”

[turnabout4what]

You used to be diagnosed with ADHD, but then got diagnosed with autism, right? Aside from needing a lot of time to recharge after social stuff, can I ask what kinds of things tipped you off as to the difference? My psychiatrist is looking at an ASD diagnosis for me after years of being labeled ADHD... and I don’t really know what to think. If this is too personal feel free to ignore it!

I’m still diagnosed with ADD, but I’m strongly suspected of having autism. I haven’t been able to pursue a diagnosis because of COVID, but I’ve been in therapy for both. Before I answer your question, I’m going to go over the overlap between ASD and ADD, because you can work on these things regardless of the diagnosis. It’s very stressful to not have a clear idea of what you’re “supposed” to be experiencing!

1.      RSD, or Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria. Do you feel physical pain whenever a stranger on the internet implies you’re a bad person? You may have this common symptom of ASD and ADD.

2.      Difficulties with executive functioning. Lots of people have trouble motivating themselves to do things, but ADD and ASD make it even harder!

3.      Emotional regulation. You may become angry or anxious very easily, and you may be oversensitive. This often comes with impulsivity, especially in ADD.

4.      Hyperfocusing. Do you ever start cleaning your room and then find yourself unable to stop? This frequently is accompanied by forgetting to eat. Generally, this happens with things that you enjoy doing, but when I’m stressed, it often involves cleaning.

5.      Being prone to addiction. This can be drugs, or it can be video games or any number of things that give you a boost of dopamine. Additionally, you may get short-term obsessions. Watching a TV show may be incredibly stressful unless you can binge the entire thing in one weekend.

6.      Not being able to make and keep friends in elementary school. I was great at making friends, but I could never keep them. Combined with RSD, this was devastating.

7.      A lack of focus on work and school. Notably, if you also have anxiety, you may still be able to pull off good grades by using your anxiety to rein in your focus. I was once told by a psychiatrist who sat down with me for only ten minutes that kids with executive dysfunction couldn’t have a 4.0 GPA and that he didn’t believe I had trouble focusing. Two appointments later, he apologized and officially diagosed me with ADD. There’s a reason I don’t totally trust his diagnosis. I do find it interesting and relieving that your psychiatrist is looking at an ASD diagnosis; a lot of psychiatrists don’t consider that a possibility if you weren’t diagnosed in early childhood.

8.      Forgetting deadlines, leaving things you needed at home, and generally being an organizational disaster by neurotypical standards. My third grade teacher gave me the “tornado award” in front of the entire class to publicly shame me for how messy my desk was.

 Now, to answer your question, here are the things that stood out as being indicators of me having ASD:

1.      ASD runs in my family. My dad didn’t speak until the age of 6, and my younger brother was diagnosed as autistic when he was about two years old.

2.      I have a sensory disorder that frequently interferes with my everyday life. I’m the type who can’t be inside of a candle store for more than 10 minutes because the smells are too overwhelming. At homecoming and prom, I could be found as far away from the speakers as possible, wishing the evening would end and we could all go home. Interestingly, my issue isn’t with volume, but with how unfamiliar a sound is—I went to a TOP concert with intense earplugs in. For the opening band, I got so sick that I went to the bathroom and curled up in a ball with my hands over my ears. But when TOP started playing, I was able to take my earplugs out and I felt perfectly fine. Notably, I know every lyric to every TOP song on Spotify, and I’d never heard the opening band before.

3.      People who are AFAB and high intelligence frequently don’t show the standard signs of ASD due to how we’re socialized as infants. If you’ve ever stood in a mirror and practiced making facial expressions and hand gestures, it’s a sign you intellectually learned how to act neurotypical. Most people pick up on that intuitively.

4.      I only recently discovered that when someone asks, “How are you?” you’re supposed to ask them that question back. I always hated when people asked me that, since I was expected to say that I was doing well, so I never returned it. I didn’t realize that was rude. I still occasionally find things that are considered basic communication that I never realized.

5.      My dad was physically abused as a child whenever he showed symptoms of ASD, and unfortunately that meant my younger brother and I were verbally abused any time we stimmed, talked about our special interests, or reacted strongly to sensory stimuli. Because of this, I didn’t indulge my childhood special interest until I was well into college: insects. As soon as I started taking classes about insects, I occasionally scared classmates and even professors! I’m normally a soft and smiley person, but when I’m hyperfocused on something that really interests me, I fall into a certain state that my friends have described as “intense.”

6.      Stimulant ADD medications like Adderall and Vyvanse did not work for me. They made me more anxious and didn’t improve my focus well. You know what did work? Wellbutrin. My doctor actually just upped my Wellbutrin dose and I feel incredible

This was extremely long, but hopefully helpful! Note that all of the problems I’ve had with my ASD or ADD came from surrounding myself with people who never tried to understand me. Now I have friends who plan events with my sensory sensitivities in mind, who point out my mistakes without making me feel rejected, and who are excited to see me even when I’m 15 minutes late… again. Neither diagnosis means there’s something wrong with you. It just means people have to put in a little extra work to understand you, and I promise you’ll find people who know you’re worth that extra work.

Best wishes, anon!

[kyurilin]

2010-2019 Or The Overly Non Dramatic Story of How Kyuri's Decade Went

Technically this isn't a part of this decade review but I'm posting this on December 24th specifically because 10 years ago today I spoke to @mist-over-water on the phone for the first time after having known her for three years and I'm pretty sure we both cried

2010

met @mist-over-water for the first time in person. Took her to the beach where she promptly got roasted by the sun. Took her to the mountains. Took her out to practice driving in a local high school parking lot because why not. I cried so hard when she had to go home and God help me I'd only known her four years at that point.

Flunked a math class for the first time. Funny enough, it was because I'd been put in the advanced math courses for years and that was the year I both had a teacher I hated and could no longer reasonably fake my way through understanding math. Don't put your kids in advanced courses unless you're certain they can keep up with it people I only really was an advanced reader.

My dog Scruffy passed away :(

Started my senior year of high school

2011

Managed to graduate high school on time despite having to take 2 whole math courses during senior year (and with @mist-over-water 's who will now be referred to as Gabby because simplicity buddies sending me 'GRADUATE' messages so I'd have the motivation to go see her in person)

Got to go to England to see Gabby which, dream come true. Had a blast. Met the two precious nieces she had, her brother who's accent I couldn't understand, her mom who is one of the sweetest people, and her grandparents who I got to watch a lot of old British gameshows with.

Saw Wicked from second row seats in London.

Saw Cars 2 three times with Gabby which is why I'm still emotionally invested in Cars 2 because boy getting to see the sequel movie to the movie that ended up allowing you to cross paths with someone you really clicked with is AN. EXPERIENCE.

Cried when I finally had to leave because I was 18 and terrified of the future and didn't know when or if I'd ever see my friend in person again.

Started at community college in the film and video program

2012

Finished my first year of community college

Wrote my first original novel that will honestly never see the light of day. It's terrible ya'll

Through circumstances I still regret started losing my friendship with Gabby and boy do I hate who I was a person during that time

Started my second year of community college

2013

Worked on the X Factor as a production assistant.

Probably around this time that Gabby and I stopped talking which was better for us at that point. Still took an emotional toll to lose a friend that I'd known for 7 years at that point but in the long run we did need the distance (and I'm sorry to throw it all out here like this Gabby if you want it edited tell me I'm just putting it all out lmao)

Through a cosmic aligning of the universe by which I mean a special interest in both Minecraft and Achievement Hunter at the same time, I found a small Minecraft server that I could play on and met some really great people

Started my third year of community college

Oh yeah met @inspector-starfish from the Minecraft server for the first time in person, me and my brother stole her from her college and took her to the state fair with us.

2014

Started easing into talking to Gabby again (I remember the message with new baby Imogen!!!) Which was a blessing

I can't remember if it was 2014 or 2015 but at some point Gabby also hung out with me on the Minecraft server with my other buddies

Worked on Catfish as a Production Assistant for like 2 days and I still think I was fired lmao

My dad was arrested. Which is... The hardest thing to type out. Because everything before 2014 feels so distant because of the events.

He got put in jail and we bailed him out, but a month later he got arrested again and we couldn't bail him out this time.

God help me I'm so glad I had gotten back to talking to Gabby at this point I vaguely remember a sobbing Skype call between us.

I don't even remember what classes I was in at community college anymore that's how bad it is.

I basically dropped out though.

I stopped writing, I stopped drawing, I stopped... Being. That's really what it narrows down to. Only one of my real life friends knew what happened and I broke down everytime I thought about it so i'm pretty sure at one point I had a panic attack on my way to hang out with Friend A, who knew, and Friend B, who didn't.

I did start talking to @rhysispiecess that year. Through a post on here actually (we were also on the same Minecraft server but because I didn't really play that much that I remember after this whole thing I kinda forgot who he was).

I think (maybe???) I also met @belle-sourires and @youllthinkofsomething that year.

We moved from the house we'd lived in 13 years to a little rental house where we had the sweetest neighbors

2015

I spent a lot of time reading and crying in 2015 lmao

Also spent a lot of time talking to @rhysispiecess (the FNAF AU years God bless them for being a much needed distraction from real life)

Dad went to actual prison and boy that's an experience having to visit him there every week

We moved again this time to a small apartment

Got my first real job that wasn't being a production assistant (the same job I still have!)

Started to make actual attempts at writing again but struggled with it a lot

2016

For the first time since 2014 I actually wrote more than a simple one off story of the course of a month

Saved up my money and went to California to meet @rhysispiecess and @27thousandlizards.

Confused the shit out of Luke's (@27thousandlizards ) grandma

Was so tired I cried when I saw how little Corgi puppies are

Got to see @inspector-starfish and @youllthinkofsomething in San Diego where they were doing a robot thing as usual

Got to see the end bit of Route 66 cause wouldn't you know Rhys lives right near it (and as a huge Cars fan oh my God FATE)

Had an absolute blast with both Rhys and Luke and cried when I had to leave them because boy do I love friends

2017

Cars 3 came out and I transcended to a higher plane of being

Okay not really but I'm sure ya'll remember the days where I was mostly a Cars blog

100% I know I've said this before but all of the Cars movies have hit with specific messages at exactly the point in my life I needed to hear those messages so like. Poetic cinema.

Made some fantastic friends from those days

After 11 years of attempts at writing a redemption arc for a certain Cars character I finally wrote one and IT WAS GREAT

Cars 3 also managed to make me write again which has continued to be a struggle since 2014

Oh yeah became single again I was in a relationship but that ended TIME FOR ALONE (learned I'm still a terrible person who doesn't handle relationships well so hey not bad I'll leave people out of my overly anxious 'they must hate me' mentality)

2018

Fell out of writing again after the Cars 3 hype died down enough lmao

Got to meet @whipplefilter and @the-kings-tail-fin for a road trip around NC which was fantastic

Played way too much Nintendo Switch

Gabby got engaged and I absolutely cried for like an hour because how the fuck do you not cry when someone you've known for so long gets engaged (I'm still so happy for her @onetruejonsey seems like a really wonderful guy)

Oh yeah we moved again we have a real house now but the neighbors are redneck assholes

2019

Thanks to FNAF Help Wanted, I got whiplashed back into that fandom BUT I did start writing pretty regularly again. In fact I've written more this year than all the years since I stopped COMBINED. Which means I was both in the right headspace to actually want to write again as well as being able to keep myself focused on it.

Met Jodie Benson (ARIEL!!!!!!), Daniel Logan (KID BOBA FETT) and Christopher Sabat at GalaxyCon. Right. I went to my first convention despite being terrified of it

I cried like a bitch meeting Jodie Benson and she hugged me. I told Daniel Logan I'd had a crush on him as a kid and that Attack of the Clones was still my favorite Star Wars (which it is I wasn't lying) and he hugged me. Got to hear Sean Schemmel call Christopher Sabat out for being so friendly that his line was ridiculous which was great because boy did I not have enough money to meet more than three people. Christopher Sabat was fantastic too.

Went to DC with my 3 closest IRL buddies I've known since like 2008 and despite some arguments none of us killed each other. Nearly destroyed my feet from all the walking though. Don't know how we'd survive a trip to Japan which they all want to do.

Started formulating my next novel idea

It's been a long decade. Really the first half feels like it happened to another person.

I want to say, more than anything, if it weren't for Gabby I never would have had the courage to meet so many of my other online friends. She flew over here to meet me when I was 17 and she was 15 going on 16. We were so young and my dad and her mom worked so hard to make sure that we could actually meet each other and I'm forever thankful for that. I went across the ocean by myself at 18, an autistic disaster of a human, and somehow I didn't panic or get lost or anything. Without those experiences I never would have had the courage to do a lot of the things I've done since.

I'm still terrified of the future though. I have no idea if I'll even save enough money to go to England to see Gabby again (and God we actually need to talk more because I feel like a terrible friend ALL I DO IS SEND GIRAFFE PHOTOS). I don't even know what I want out of life.

Here's hoping though that I can continue to have some adventures and meet more of my online buddies in the next decade!

[eikyun]

Eishi Tsukasa Essay; how I met him, and 10 reason why I love him

Caution: it will be pretty long. Please bear with me >_<

In this post, I’m going to spill out all of my feelings I have for this guy. Stay away if you hate him, okay :) Hating Eishi is a bad civilization :p

I met Eishi 3 years 9 months ago, exactly at November 2015. After I finished watching the 1st season of Shokugeki anime, I was interested to read the manga. For the most thing I was more curious about the rest of Elite 10. With the information I got from Google, I clicked ch 119 and... tada~ At a manga panel, I saw a beautiful white haired male sitting while drinking a cup of tea.

“Wow, he is hot.” I mumbled. Yes, I was attracted to his looks at first glance. He is totally my type, appearance wise. Two next pages later, the cool, collected guy I saw before suddenly turned into an anxious, shy dorkie boy. 

“Is he actually the 1st seat?? Omg this is getting interesting.” I thought. How could soggy guy like him can gain the highest rank in the friggin Totsuki Academy?? This fact tickled my curiosity more, I wanted to know more about this guy. I skipped to ch 132, where Soma and Megumi met Eishi in his booth (I read the chapters in order later, though). It was more emphasized that our 1st seat is a true introvert, and a perfectionist. This guy... is very similar to me. 

He automatically jumped into my most favorite SnS character. No, he became my most favorite anime/manga character at that time.

After I read SnS until the latest chapter (ch 145), I eagerly waited for his next apperance. When ch 148 released, I saw him on a pretty big panel, sitting leisurely while watching the Souma vs Eizan from the screen... my heart skipped a beat, my lip drew a wide smile. What’s up with me? I just knew him for like... less than a month, and yet I felt like an idiot when I saw him. Did I... fall in love?

It took 4 months until his next appearance (ch 161). I was extremely happy to see him again, and I couldn’t wait to know about him more and more. During that Souma vs Eishi battle arc, I learned more about Eishi, I was amazed that the way he talked... the demeanor he showed... is very similar to me. I never met a 2D character (or perhaps irl people) who shared a lot of similarity (personality wise) with me. I felt more kinship with him more than with Megumi, who is also a shy character. This fact just made love him even more.

***

From ch 118 until Le Dessert ch 1, plus Betsubara 6 and 7 and some extras, my feelings for Eishi remains same. Here’s my 10 reason why I love a chef named Tsukasa Eishi.

1. Let’s start from the shallowest thing; looks. Yes, he is undoubtly good looking, I’m sure everyone must admit it! Nobody can resist that beautiful pale lavender iris with outstanding long eyelashes, combined with that gorgeous shining white hair... Oh, how ethereal. His fair skin, slender and long fingers, his alluring neck, his collarbone, his body shape, his waist— aaaaah ok ok I’ll stop >////< in tl;dr, people would fall in love by his looks alone, but when they find out his true self, who knows?

2. Fashion sense. I know you guys might find his flying necktie weird, but I admit, it looks so damn cool on him. Not to mention, I love how he wears his uniform, both school and chef one. The unbuttoned collar, half-rolled sleeves... What an unexpected style for a shy boy like him, huh? But I don’t care, if it makes him looks hotter, I’ll take it~ Not to mention the collection of casual outfits he has. He’s not on the fashionista tier for sure, but he still has good sense. Well, I can say that he looks good on everything.

3. His voice. This is something I admitted way later. At first I wasn’t too fond of Akira Ishida’s voice on him. Too ‘husky’ for me, I thought. However, the more I hear him talking on anime, the more I’m used to it, then it grows on me. Now everytime he speaks, my heart throbs faster. The power of love is too strong haha.

4.      The adorable gap moe! Gap moe! Gap moe! Eishi’s gap moe is... too cute and irresistable >///< I’m sure people’s first impression of him is... a cool, elegant, and handsome guy... he must be a very cool guy like heroine’s love interest in shoujo manga or Korean drama! Who knows if he’s actually a huge dork! He can show you his anxious, worry-wart side at unexpected time, wrecking his previous prince-like image completely. What a gap! Would he stay calm and stoic everytime people surround him? Please don’t scare this soft guy, he would be freaked out and get nervous >_< 

His gap is also shown by his demeanor towards people. If it’s someone he barely knows and cares, he wouldn’t bat an eye, hence you call him an absolute selfish guy. However, he shows his care towards someone close to him. Just look how he treats Rindou (hmph, I’m so jelly :<) I’m sure he’d super sweet to his girlfriend and treat her like a princess, if he has one someday! >_<

5. If he is that spineless, is he actually an incompetent guy? Hell no! You all must know that he’s one of the best chefs in the series! If you’re going to deny this, you must read/watch a wrong series lol. He had sit on the throne of 1st seat of Elite 10 for freakin’ two years (there’s a plot hole about this, but regardless he gained the 1st  seat on 2nd year or 3rd, my point still stands). The more amazing thing is, he gained it not by magic or ahem, plot no jutsu. Many said that he’s a natural genius chef, however, he worked hard for that sweet 1st seat. You can reread/rewatch the whole of SnS to prove his competence in cooking.

6. His elegance. French cuisine as his speciality alone proves that. His dishes always have luxurious presentation. The taste? If only I could actually taste it... ;_; Throughout the series, it’s proved that he never fails to make a lot of people amazed. Not only by his dishes, people are also enthralled by his elegance in kitchen. The way he keeps composure while cooking, the way he interacts with ingredients, the way he set the plating of his dish... it’s like watching a prima ballerina dancing in an opera. Oh, not to mention, his nickname sounds elegant and noble as heck! Let me say it; Weiss Ritter der Tafel! The White Knight of the The Table!

7. Have I said he’s a hard-worker? Sure he is. Since junior high, he had set his goal to be the 1st seat of Elite Ten, and he didn’t just sit down for the whole of his time in Totsuki. He was famous as ‘Teacher Crusher’ for his effort to drag teachers nearby to try his countless test dishes. 

Even after he gained it and graduated from Totsuki, he still aimed to be a better cook! Can’t you just imagine how persistent—I mean, hard-working he is? His hardwork isn’t limited to cooking only; he is a diligent boy in general. As he got the 1st seat title, he didn’t throw his responsibility down to the rest and walk away like a boss. He hates paperworks and especially public speaking, yet he’s responsible enough not to ignore his duties. People might see him as a doormat for letting himself doing Rindou and the others’ paperworks, but not for me. Who’s the selfish one then? :p 

He deserves my highest respect for his hard-working nature and being responsible.

8. His innocence— I mean, it’s more like his naivety. This trait might be irritating for some people, and in Eishi’s case, it lead him to earn the ‘bastard/asshole’ title by those who misunderstand him, due to his incompetence to understand people’s feelings. It’s emphasized by the fact that he tends to be straightforward, both in words and act. 

His naivety makes sense, he lacks social/communication skill since he’s an introvert (not all introverts sucks in social skill, though). He doesn’t interact with a people much. Eishi’s own world is just around cooking and nothing else lol, that’s why he’s focused on his own cooking and prioritizes it above anything else. Sounds like an autistic person, you say? Maybe. As someone who has a tiny bit of autism, I understand this side of him well and I can’t blame him for that. I always find myself being busy in my own world, and I tend not to interact with people much. I’m not saying that he’s diagnosed with autism, no. He might have a bit of it, just like myself. So don’t blame him for forgetting Kuga after his match with him, he was just way too busy in his own world XD

Talking about innocence... isn’t he also actually an innocent, adorkable boy? I mean, he seems to have a relatively pure mind. He never actually means to harm people. If the others think so, it’s mostly a misunderstanding. He might be blunt with his words, but he’s just being honest, you know. He never lies. 

Please give him a chance, I believe he’ll grow to be a better person in future.

9. The previous point has connection with this one, his introverted nature. I can say he is 90% introvert. Isn’t it obvious? He is undoubtly shy boy, hates public speaking, easily gets nervous in front of a lot of people, prefers to cook alone, lacks of social skill... he is socially impaired, Rindou said so. However, he tries to overcome his social anxiety for the sake to be a better chef. Isn’t it great?

As a fellow true introvert, I find Eishi very relatable, thus I feel a deep connection between me and him. Every time I feel anxious in front of people, I think of Eishi that he would feel the same and imagine that we would overcome our shared obstacle together.

10.  Eishi isn’t Tsukasa Eishi without his dominant trait: perfectionist. 

Let’s start with the fact that his blood type is A. People with this blood type (including me) tend to be perfectionist and organized. You can search more about it on Google, and you’ll find out that Eishi fits most of A-type traits! You might see his obsession for perfection a bit annoying, but that’s Eishi for you. Everything he does must be perfect. He’s someone who makes plans and he wants to follow those plans completely. It leads him to be a hard-worker, but it also makes him prone to stress and worry. Is being a perfectionist a good thing? Yes, but it would drain yourself if you’re way too obsessed with perfection. Eishi seems... quite perfection obssessive. I’d say it’s way too much because I don’t want to see him being trapped in the endless loop of reaching perfection and drained him both physically and mentally. I’m also a perfectionist, but not as much as him, yet I understand how painful it is. I love this side of him for another reason; he always has a clear goal; honing his cooking skill to be perfect, and works hard for that. I’d prefer someone like that than a hopeless person who has no goal in their life. I admire people who try hard to reach their dreams. Also, he always gets things done properly and never try to be half-assed.

My conclusion: Eishi isn’t perfect, despite of being obsessed with perfection. He isn’t a perfect husbando material, but he’s perfect in my eyes. He has flaws and weakness, but I’d embrace those and keep loving him. I love you, Tsukasa Eishi.

[waltdisneyconfessions]

ASK A DISNEY MANAGER: QUESTIONS ANSWERED!

This is a repost because of accidental deletion. Awhile back you guys sent in questions for a Disney Manager, below are his responses! Thank you!

1. What is the worst experience/mistake you've ever made with a guest? What is the best experience you've had with a guest?  I think my worst experience or moment was during my college program. I remember arriving at merge area at Peter Pan's Flight where Fastpass and standby guests merge into one line, and the Fastpass line was extremely long. I stepped in and tried my best to get the Fastpass line under control and I remember a few families in the standby line yelling obscenities at me. Once I began to let a few standby guests in, all I remember was five or six adults standing around me in a circle, screaming at me. I was so stressed that I tried to grab the attention of the person working to load guests onto the attraction, to ask if she would switch with me briefly because I thought I was going to break down and begin crying. Instead, I walked away from the merge area with no Cast Member there for a minute or two. I walked over to the person working in the load position, and said, "I'm really sorry, but I can't work in that position right now." We swapped positions until one of my managers could pull me aside to talk. I honestly thought I was going to get into trouble for walking away, but my manager was understanding and spent a few minutes with me to make sure I was okay. 

2. As someone who was a Disney manager, would you openly recommend it as a job to anyone who would want to work at Disney?

Personally, I would recommended working for Disney!

As with any job, I would also encourage those interested in working at Disney to evaluate and make decisions about their own career path before immediately making the jump to work for the company. Do your homework! Determine exactly what you would like your career path to be, study and read up on the company culture, and be prepared to work hard.

Also remember that Disney is massive Fortune 500 company, operating domestically and internationally. If working for a large corporation isn’t your thing, I wouldn’t recommend Disney. Most often, moving up within the organization can take time because it is competitive.

3. how do they handle workers who don't speak English? at some point that must have happened right?

In many Guest facing roles, you are required to have a basic understanding of the English language, or be able to speak English to communicate with Guests. However, bilingual skills a great qualification that the company looks for in job candidates. If a Cast Member doesn’t possess strong verbal communication skills or basic English, he or she may work in a backstage role where guest contact is limited.

4. For the former manager: did you ever have a heart warming experience while working at Disney? Or was it all work and no spark? Many thanks for taking your time to answer questions ️

Actually, I have a few really heartwarming moments from my time at Disney, but one of my favorites moments involved me assisting with surprising a young guest with a tour the Cinderella Castle Suite whose favorite character was Cinderella. The highlight of the tour was seeing the expression on the guest’s face when she knocked on the door to the Suite and Cinderella opened it. I, along with her parents and a few other Cast Members involved, were on the verge of tears.  

5. What's the snottiest, most entitled guest you've ever dealt with? And any recs for getting into the Disney College Program? Is there a chance to move up in the company into, say, the writing division in animation? Thank you so much <3

This is tough one for me because I can’t think of a specific story. That’s probably because the person acted so entitled that I wanted to completely erase them from my memory once they were gone. lol.

I will say that I’ve dealt with several Guests who have tried to essentially “pull rank” or highlight their social status by mentioning they were either lawyers or doctors when things weren’t going their way or they weren’t satisfied. I’ve also dealt with people who have tried to belittle me (and even other Cast) by assuming most of us didn’t graduate high school or attend college because we worked in a theme park. I’ll be honest, I often take words to heart, so there were moments at the end of the day when I questioned who I was and what I was doing with my life. I can’t describe the feeling I would get when I felt defeated because someone decided to belittle me…but… the good always outweighs the bad…seriously!

Even though Disney can be a competitive environment, yes, there are opportunities of moving up. I think using the College Program as your stepping stone is a great start! As for getting into the program, I would recommend opening yourself to as many roles as possible when you’re applying. I often hear that you chances are better if you don’t limit yourself to only one or two roles. These positions aren’t always going to be glamorous, but it’s what you make of it. If you are hoping to build a career at Disney, remind yourself that it has to start somewhere…and that somewhere may not be in the role you envisioned yourself. I recommend reading up on the roles available to DCP participants just to get an idea.  Apply early! During the interview process think about how you respond to situational questions using your past experience. Be prepared to discuss your strengths and weaknesses, and have a few follow-up questions for after the interview. I could go on and on!! If you need more advice with the process, let me know and I would be glad to give you even more preparation tips.

Finally, as for landing a career within animation, I would recommend the path of doing a college program, to familiarize yourself with the Disney culture (be a strong and consistent performer during your DCP experience),and  looking for an internship after that… Here’s a good link to check out: https://www.disneyanimation.com/careers/interns-apprentices#life-at-disney

6. can I just ask if there's something like special training on supporting Autistic Adults? Or just facilities in general? I'm saving to go to Florida next year for DisneyWorld but I'm very scared on how I may be treated if I start reacting badly to overstimulation :/

Cast Members complete training for assisting guests with specific needs, including autism, and how to assist guests requiring special assistance as part of the training process. When I worked in Guest Relations, I had to familiarize myself with the location of “break areas” throughout the parks which are helpful for individuals becoming over-stimulated. However, I think more Cast Members working in the park need to become more familiar with these locations.

Overall though I wouldn’t fear making the trip to WDW. I would recommend planning out your trip and studying up before taking your trip. Disney has some good planning resources including information for services for Guests with cognitive disabilities available on their website, and they also have a Guest with Disabilities department that can contact by phone or email before your visit.

7. how often did guests have asinine requests? like stupid things: "can you make the rain stop?"

Or… can we see Walt’s frozen corpse at the castle? lol. I’ve heard that one a couple of times. I also remember being asked by a father whose child wasn’t tall enough to ride an attraction, “what if I stuff my child’s shoes and come back later? Will you let him ride then?”

8. what are the best secrets that guests can access at the parks but few do? Also is the paintbrush on tom Sawyer island actually a thing? One last thing, what is the pay like? (Answer if you want, I know it’s not necessarily my place) I’ve always wanted to work there but I live in Ohio so I’m deciding whether it’s worth it to move. Thank you and you’re an amazing human being <3

I think some of the best secrets aren’t found within attractions or shows, but in some of the smallest details that Guests tend to overlook. For me, I enjoy the fact that the parks are full of small Easter eggs. For example, there is a telephone in the back of the Chapeau (the hat shop on Main Street) at Magic Kingdom. It looks like a simple prop hanging on the wall, but when you pick it up you can hear a funny “party line” conversation between two people. Or, if you’re ever in the lower level of the Main Street train station, you’ll hear a telegraph tapping out the Walt Disney’s opening day speech for Disneyland in Morse code.

I wouldn’t think of this as much of a secret, but one of my favorite Disney treats is a peanut butter & jelly milkshake from 50’s Prime Time Café. Many people think you have to dine there to order one, but if you stop by the Tune-In Lounge next door, you can order one to-go! If you’ve never had one though, you must!

Paintbrushes at Tom Sawyer Island did exist for quite some time, and it was a great scavenger hunt, especially for younger guests, but the Magical Moment was removed several years ago.

To answer your question about pay, I think it depends on your role. I think most people forget there are a wide variety of roles at Walt Disney World alone. I don’t know the exact current starting pay rates for guest-facing hourly positions, but the range is anywhere between $8 to just over $12 depending on the type of role.

And if that "you're an amazing human being comment was directed at me"... Thanks so much! I appreciate that! :)

9. I always loved Disney Quest, and we made one final trip when we heard it was closing. We had a blast, but the main attractions did look run down and out of date, and we constantly joked about the ps2 style graphics. It seemed like Disney sunk a lot of money into DQ for opening day and did little else to update it since. Do you have any info on why this was, or on what led to Disney Quest closing down? I feel like there was still a lot of potential there, especially with Disney's new properties

I think people have created their own theories behind the demise of DisneyQuest.  DQ was a pretty ambitious project by a division of the company known at the time as Disney Regional Entertainment. The long term goal was to open DisneyQuest locations in several major cities throughout the country. DisneyQuest Chicago opened in 1998 and closed two years later. Groundbreaking for another location in Philadelphia started and was halted after the DisneyQuest concept didn’t sustain itself in Chicago, and there were a number of reasons thrown out for its failure…from the theme park admission price structure to enter, to the lack of return visits, and Disney simply misunderstanding the market which led to low attendance.  

Unfortunately, I don’t have the exact “why” behind the closing of DQ at WDW. I think many will say that a lack of investment was the primary cause. I will agree there wasn’t much invested into DQ after the property transferred hands from Disney Regional Entertainment to WDW park operations. I think one of the biggest challenges for Disney was keeping up with the rapidly evolving technology trends to ensure that DisneyQuest stayed relevant, and the possibility of having update attractions within the building frequently to keep up. In the end, I think executives within Disney figured it would be wiser to invest its money into its largest attendance draw, its theme parks.

10. What was your best day and what was your worst day working? My worst day? Hmm...working in Guest Relations when it started raining during the last two hours of a Halloween Party. I remember the line for Guest Relations stretching across Town Square on Main Street...and there were lots of angry people. I wouldn't say it was the worst day, but it was definitely stressful. It's difficult to narrow it down to just one because I've quite a few memorable days. I think one of the best days involved the Cinderella Suite magical moment I was part of (mentioned in a previous question).  11. What was the weirdest complaint someone brought to Guest Relations?

A guest who was upset because he ended up getting wet while riding Splash Mountain. He tried his hardest to convince me there was nothing convincing him that he or his family would get wet on the ride, and that the rest of his day was ruined because his shirt was wet. Try listening to that with a straight face and concerned face…

12. if you had been high enough on the food chain to make larger changes to the park, what would be the most important thing you'd want to accomplish?

Hmm, interesting question. The first...BRING BACK THE ORIGINAL JOURNEY INTO IMAGINATION attraction, with some slight updates.

Although it’s practically unrealistic, if there was one thing could change about WDW would be its size, and try removing some of the growing pains that have come as a result of the WDW sprawl. I often think that Walt Disney World expanded at a pretty rapid pace, and maybe much too quickly at times.  After my first visit to Disneyland almost 15 years ago, I fell in love with the place. I felt like Guests had a personal connection to Disneyland, and that wasn’t something I had ever really noticed in Florida. As corny as it sounds, there is a certain charm about Disneyland and I think a lot of that not only has to do the fact that it was the only Disney park that Walt was involved in operationally, but it also has something to with the size and walkability of the resort.

13. How do you feel about the union negotiations? (From a current and scared part timer in the parks)

What has you scared?  My feelings are rather mixed about the current negotiations. I’ll be honest and say that I do think pay increases are needed, and that Cast Members are generally held to a standard higher than any other individual working within similar positions in the industry. I’m just not completely certain if $15/hour is going to be the solution. I don’t think I’m best person to ask regarding facts and figures because I’m not an economist.

As an outsider looking in, I do think that the negotiations has had an impact on service levels within Disney’s parks and resorts. I think the union will continue leverage the belief that if the organization expects such high performance standards, then Cast Members need to be paid appropriately to reflect those expectations.

On the other side of the debate, I think it’s possible to see a future where Disney will eventually begin to heavily focus on marketing its attractions and experiences to continue to entice people to visit, remove those high expectations often place on hourly guest-facing roles, and treat the role of Cast Member as simply a “ride attendant” or “sales associate” rather than placing emphasis on the role of a Cast Member as something unique (hopefully, that makes sense and it doesn’t appear that I’m rambling).  

One thing I will stand by is this… I recommend that Cast Members take time to develop their skill and not allow themselves to become complacent. Personally, I’ve witnessed a lot of that during my time with the company. I had moments when I felt that way about myself as well.  I know that each person has a different story, and a different set of circumstances, but I would love to see more hourly Cast Members try to advantage of Disney’s education funding/reimbursement program. I’m not certain if the new higher education program benefits announced earlier this year are available to WDW hourly employees, but if so, I would encourage people to take advantage of it! Even if a person thinks they are not cut out for college, the new program covers vocational training which provides individuals with a better opportunity to develop their skills.

14. What was your favorite magical moment you gave and received? [see Cinderella Castle Suite response] 15. Do you know what kind if engineers Disney hires the most? I'm looking at electrical engineering for college but I'm not sure if that's a good approach if I want to work at Disneyworld or Disneyland.

I think electrical engineering is a good choice and you’ll definitely find a number of positions seeking individuals with backgrounds in that specialization. It’s tough to say which types of engineers the company hires the most of, but I think some of the most common consist of mechanical, electrical, systems engineering, and even audio/visual engineering.

As you make your decision, I would definitely pay a visit to disneycareers.com and do a job search for engineering. I think you’ll learn that there is a pretty diverse offering of engineering roles not only in Parks and Resorts, but companywide as well.

Mod Jen: I’m going to butt in here: I was close with many of the maintenance team at Disney and I know straight from them that electrical is much more lucrative than mechanical, because you’re at greater risk. You also get paid more. 

16. If I want to become an imagineer at the parks, is there anything I can do to improve my chances of being hired as one?

Definitely ensure that you have a degree specialized in a field of engineering, art, or another creative field. If you are into design, it will be important that you start building a professional portfolio as well.

If you’re currently in college or a recent graduate, I would highly recommend looking into Professional Internships with Walt Disney Imagineering (WDI). I think the professional internship is a great way to “get your foot in the door” and understand the culture of Imagineering. I know a few people who have taken the internship route, worked hard, and were offered opportunities to continue their career with Imagineering after graduation. If you’ve been out of school for a while, I recommend looking for entry level positions within WDI, or take on a job with a design or engineering firm elsewhere so that you can develop some career experience. I know some Imagineers weren’t always Disney “fanatics” or knew much about the history of Disney prior to joining, but they’re experience and portfolio stood out as something Disney saw as creative or unique.

For designers, WDI hosts an annual design competition for college students and recent grads called “Imaginations” which gives winners the opportunity to be considered for internships.

17. Hi! I was wondering is there an age limit for DCP? I'd love to apply before I move out to CA for grad school. I'm 30. I also have multiple disabilities, mainly Cerebral Palsy. What jobs can be done from a power wheelchair? How accessible is Disneyland?

There is no age limit on the DCP. At one of my locations, I worked with someone who was 45 years old when she did her first program. As long as you’re enrolled full-time or part-time at a university, or a recent graduate. Utilizing a power wheelchair isn’t an issue at all, and there are a variety of positions you would be able to work within Disney’s parks and resorts. There will probably be some limits working in some roles though (such as some attractions) since those may require the ability to travel up or down stairs to access areas of the attraction when it’s needed.

Overall, I think Disney does an excellent job when it comes to accessibility within its parks. If you were to compare accessibility between the two parks in Anaheim, Disney’s California Adventure would probably win since it was built more recently with ADA accessibility in mind. Disneyland still does a great job with accessibility though, it’s just that many of the attractions may not have queues that are wheelchair accessible, so instead they use alternate entrances.

18. What are your guys' favourite Disney rides? Have you guys went to some of the other parks outside of the US?

My all-time favorite is The Haunted Mansion. I’ve always been obsessed about the early history and the development of the attraction. Laugh if you want, but It’s a Small World is another one of my favorites (I worked there during my college program). Spaceship Earth is another. I have yet to visit any of the Disney parks outside of the US. Tokyo Disneyland is on my list of must-sees!

19. How did you work up the ladder to manager? What position did you start in, how did you get that position, and what other positions did you have between then and manager?

I began my Disney career as a part-time attractions host at Space Mountain which lasted about two months before I transferred to a full-time attractions host role at DisneyQuest. It was during my time at DisneyQuest that I decided I wanted to become a Disney leader. Before stepping into an actual leadership position with Disney, you often have to take on the challenge of informal leadership positions, such as a trainer or coordinator. Six months after starting at DQ, I interviewed for an attractions trainer position and that became my first step to gaining some leadership experience.

During my time as a trainer, I began to communicate regularly with another manager who became my mentor, and he helped guide me through me through the process of strengthening my resume and interview skills. After spending a year at DisneyQuest, my mentor and the operations manager suggested that I transfer from DisneyQuest to an attraction at a park as a way of gaining more experience working at an attraction with a high guest capacity. I took their advice and transferred to Mission:Space at Epcot and became a trainer within six months of working there.

During this period, I was also given an amazing opportunity to join the Disney Traditions team as a Traditions Assistant facilitator. For those unfamiliar with Disney, Traditions is the new hire orientation that all company employees go through. This was a year-long, “once-in-your-Disney-career,” experience that I think helped open doors for me at WDW as well.

Almost two years after starting with Disney, I went through a process known at the time as Leadership Casting Call. This was the process WDW used to identify and develop a pool of talent to become Guest Service Managers for each line of business at Disney’s parks and resorts. After lots of networking, mock interview preparations, and finally, the actual interviews, I was selected to be part of the talent pool. My first temporary position as a manager took me back to DisneyQuest. This would also be the place where I would end up becoming a full-time manager about 8 months later.

20.  Is Splash Mountain an awkward subject to discuss? Have people asked about what that ride is based off of, & if they do, were you allowed to tell them about Song of the South, or did you have to lie & say it's an original attraction just like Haunted Mansion or Jungle Cruise?

Honestly, I’ve never had to have an awkward conversation about Splash Mountain. I think majority of the population may not connect the attraction with the movie Song of the South.

21. What has been one or more of the craziest experiences/incidents you ever had working for Disney?

     Splash Mountain probably led to some of my craziest and most interesting challenges ever. One of the craziest moments though was witnessing a ride vehicle at Splash Mountain nearly on the verge of sinking with Guests onboard because the log was taking on too much water.  Everyone was okay, but they pretty much drenched from the waist down. The family was pretty understanding in the end and actually ended up being some of the nicest people I’d ever interacted with while working at Disney.

[autaceenby]

Atypical review #long

Firstly I've heard conflicting reports that this show was sponsored (maybe not the right word...involved?) by Autism Speaks or at least their "experts" that they drag out whenever they need to infantasise Autistic people. Which given how I feel about this show it pretty much could be true.

But on to the review!

The overall plot of the show is a standard coming of age story..but with added autism! It's advertised as a comedy but it's more a dramady (dramatic comedy), which too be fair; for me at least, isn't very funny. Most of the shows "jokes" come at Sam: the autistic main characters expense. Subplots include: Sam's sister getting into college, Sam's mums affair 😡 (more on that later) and Sam's therapists deteriorating relationship.

I think the most likeable character is Sam's sister. In the show she actually seems to be a sympathetic character, however she does have some negative moments, such as her standing up to bullies but she herself says she is the only person allowed to bully Sam (go figure 😞). The sister's boyfriend, whilst also a sympathetic character is introduced in the stereotypical, "so romantic but in real life he would be arrested for stalking and harassment" scenario that appears in every show.

The main character: Sam, is Autistic (unless you missed practically the only thing this show was marketed on) and whilst he does display SOME characteristics that make him a realistic portrayal of an Autistic teen, his other traits are dialled up to 11 (and probably a lot higher), he has next to no sense of humour (annoying stereotype #1) he takes literally everything literally (deliberate) (annoying stereotype #2), like in every instance someone talks to him, he takes it literally. Now in moderation this could have been well done and interesting, but he does it countless times that by the end of the first episode I was tired of him. He "can't tell lies" (annoying stereotype #3) he is pretty misogynistic and rude and stalks people (but this is played as a joke) (annoying stereotype #4) he has next to no social skills and randomly blurts stuff out (annoying stereotype #5 #6) he is portrayed as helpless (#7) he has an "uncommon" special interest (#8) cannot smile (#9).

And minor nitpicking but still: he is a white, teen, male, straight and diagnosed close to birth (#10,#11,#12,#13,#14)

Sam feels very much like a Neurotypical, "playing an Autistic character" nothing feels real. If Sam was portrayed as a realistic character, he would have at least some social skills, he would at least have some coping mechanisms, he would at least have some way of knowing how to deal with a meltdown instead of resulting to violence. Everything about Sam feels like being Autistic is completely new to him and he isn't an 18 year old who has been Autistic for that whole 18 years! (#problems of getting a Neurotypical to do an Autistics job)

Also it appears that there was no involvement or attempt at getting the involvement of actually Autistic people to even give information and insight into the show.

And now since we are here I'm going to go into how much I dislike Sam's mum. Now Jenifer Jason Leigh is producer of the show and is arguably the actual main character of the show. She is presented as completely justified in her actions and that's 100% wrong with her. She has an affair because raising an Autistic child is so hard and she tells other #autistic mums this and they all accept it as a way they "cope" with their children. This isn't just an issue with the mum as the dad left the family for some time cos he too could not cope with their child's diagnosis. The mum group is also quite ableist as they all talk about how hard (their child's) autism is on them. Also a minor point but at one point the dad refers to Sam as "Autistic" and the group shuts him down saying they prefer "people with autism" which is just wrong considering every statistic about Autism Vs Autistic shows that "Autistic" is preferred. They also go on as how they ironically prefer to see Autistic people as people despite being the people they are.

At one point in the show Sam's sister is in an interview to get into college and she uses her brothers Autism as a reason why she "deserves to go there" (like wtf everyone in this show feels like they are so hard done by because of Sam)

The mum is over protective to the point of not letting him go shopping. His sister forces his girlfriend to break up with him cos she doesn't think she actually wants to be with him. (Also the girlfriend Paige: is by far a more positive representation of autism than Sam ever will be #headcanon). Sam is completely heartless throughout and his therapist breaks literally every rule on do not do stuff with patients ever! (Also ask a teen to donate their brain!? Wtf). Sam's dad actually enables his son to break into his therapists house and feels so unhappy that his son doesn't like football...or rugby...or something I don't follow sports.

Overall this show does more damage than good. It doesn't even manage to create good 3D Neurotypical characters let alone the Autistic character it promised. By episode two I was holding a pillow over my head because it was so painful to watch. Hopefully this show doesn't get renewed (bet it will though cos everywhere I look people have been giving it raze reviews) (ironic that Neurotypical love this and the people it was supposed to represent hate it)

What I wish for in the future: maybe a show about an LGBT Autistic character finding out they are Autistic and trying to get a diagnosis (and maybe deciding not to, because the world loves to discriminate (maybe give the "ordinary" people something to think about when they use us as the butt of jokes)) Maybe a female or trans character of colour. Also it would be nice for them to have more than one Autistic/lgbt character per show (cos like most the people I know are either one or the other or both so it's not like We're hard to find). Or maybe make the plot of the show not about their autism at all cos both of my favourite Autistics (Lizbeth Salander and Saga Noren) (ironically both female and LGBT ) are in shows where their autism is treated as nothing more than their character (apart from some jokes about them) (but what do you expect? Equality?)

[autistic-bee-blog]

**trigger warning for self harm, suicide, mentions of emotional abuse***

There aren’t many posts (that I’ve seen) that talk about what happens when you are Autistic and people label you gifted, or a savant, or a prodigy, or any other terms similar to those. So, I’m going to talk about it, but here’s a quick disclaimer:

I wholeheartedly believe that IQ is inaccurate and discriminates against those who are not verbal, do not come from a background which provides typical academic education (i.e., those who live in poverty), and those whose skills lie outside of the bounds of spatial, verbal, auditory processing, and written comprehension. I also believe that labels such as savant, gifted, and prodigy are often used in an elitist manner to say that “these Autistics are okay because they can do ___ and have contributed heavily to society in a manner deemed profitable and/or productive"or are otherwise misapplied by outsiders to discredit those who are on the spectrum but are verbal or deemed of higher intelligence. That being said, this is an account of my personal experiences and beliefs and these viewpoints do not ring true for everyone.

So. My original diagnosis was Aspergers Syndrome, which is the exact same thing as Autism, the only difference in criteria is that those diagnosed with Aspergers Servers and not Autism were verbal before age three. This diagnosis was later re classified as Autism spectrum disorder after the publication of the DSM-V.

As a child, I spoke very early on. I mean, I was speaking full sentences by the time I was two. One of the things I remember is my fascination with colors. I memorized all of the crayola crayon names, and when I went to daycare as a little toddler we would all go over colors. But when the lady pointed out colors and all of the other kids would say "red” or “blue,” I’d say “burnt sienna” or “turquoise” or something more specific for each hue. I LOVED colors, and coloring, even if I did do it outside of the lines.

My parents noticed Autistic traits very early on with me as well. I didn’t socialize with other children, I played off by myself. I cried and screamed when certain smells, tastes, or clothing entered my environment. I had horrible meltdowns where I would become a danger to myself: I’d pull out my hair, or bang my head on a wall, or claw at myself. I had echolalia as well; teachers and kids would get mad at me because I kept making cat noises or repeating things over and over. I had such a hard time holding pencils and writing that I had to get special permission to type my assignments. I actually could not read until second grade, because i couldn’t put sounds with letters on a page. So all of these things led my parents to taking me to several psychologists and specialists, after which I received my diagnosis.

When I got older, academics became more important. I was a very curious child, and I loved to learn. My interests were strange for my age, I was fascinated by microbiology and diseases and insects and animals. I learned names of bacteria and their different strains, I watched videos on different species of spiders, I learned about diseases and medical conditions, which I memorized. I was prone to infodumping on unsuspecting strangers (my favorite story about that is a cashier in Publix who offered me hand sanitizer while my mom was paying for groceries. I looked at her very gravely, and starting warning her about the dangers of stapholoccocus and streptoloccocus, and how important it is to wash your hands and clean open wounds. My mom finally told me that that was enough, but the cashier thought it was the neatest thing ever. Fun fact: she went on to become best friends with my mother, and they keep in touch to this day.)

In third grade, people started to notice that I was ahead of other kids my age in acedemics. I was given my first IQ test, just to see where I was. I didn’t know it was an IQ test at the time, but I took it. I found out the results years later: at age nine, I had an IQ of 136.

Everyone labelled me gifted, prodigy, etc. It felt nice, encouraging even, to an Autistic kid who kept getting picked on or slammed around and ostracized by the other students. But it started a cycle that I didn’t recognize until many years later.

When I got to high school, I was awarded all sorts of things relating to standardized test scores and academic achievement. They gave me another IQ test at 16, and by that time my IQ was 146.

With all of this however, I still faced difficulties related to my Autism, amplified by ignorant teachers and school officials. I can’t drive, and I had a very hard time in math and science because of my spatial and visual processing disability, and I had a hard time writing and copying from the board because of my impaired fine motor skills along with the aforementioned disability. I also had (still have) problems talking aloud to other students or teachers, due to severe anxiety, and also following verbal directions (which got me into several less than savory situations regarding my commitment to class and my supposed lack of self advocacy. Ironically, I had an IEP which required teachers, by federal law, to comply with accommodations, including printing all directions and assignments and clarifying these things with me after class. Every time they broke that law, it was blamed on my lack of advocacy, or initiative. Even when I called for meetings, or spoke up for myself, or informed teachers repeatedly of my IEP and disability. Several teachers flat out refused to follow it and said that it was just a disciplinary issue. Others asked what would happen to me in college, in “the real world,” to which my mother retorted that I would always need some level of assistance and that they should be ashamed for trying to frighten her kid like that, like everyone was just going to abandon me in adulthood.)

I had severe problems with self esteem and self worth. I always accused people of lying when they said I was special or smart. My main issue though, was that i felt like if I wasn’t deemed smart or gifted, that I would just be broken and everyone would toss me aside and hurt me, at least, more than they already had in the past. I grew up thinking that I was obligated to redeem myself, to “make up” for being Autistic. I thought that “gifted” was the only worthwhile thing about me.

My mental health worsened too. I had started cutting and burning myself in middle school, it got worse as I got older. I starved myself in high school. I had tried to kill myself twice by the time I turned 16, and was rushed to the ER after a violent meltdown which resulted in a deep wound on my arm that required 7 stitches.

All of this could be traced back to feeling like I was, well, a piece of shit. And to the emotional abuse I endured at the hands of teachers, and the things kids did to me to mess with me, the things people whispered about me, the way they looked at me, the way my parents looked at each other. The ignorance and cruelty of people around me. Their unwillingness to listen to me, to accommodate me. Their willingness to turn away in the midst of hatred and prejudice. I began to hate them.

On bad days, I want to give up trying to explain all of this and Autism and just resign myself to the fact that nobody will ever accept and accomodate me the way I am, much less love me. I say I should just accept that I’ll probably always be at the mercy of other people, I’ll probably be abused all over again. I tell myself I’m better than them anyway, that I’m gifted and they aren’t. I try and fail to believe that lie. Those days…I try to just hide in my house and stay silent.

But the worst part of all of this, was that whenever I tried to talk about any I’d it, about “gifted” being used to ignore an obvious disability, I’d get dismissed as high functioning, or I’d be reprimanded for being ungrateful for my talents.

I got labelled gifted, and suddenly it didn’t feel like a compliment anymore, but a threat. A disavowal. Shackles of an obligation to be normal, but also smart enough to be beneficial to society, to make up for all the things they have to deal with to accommodate me.

Now, I think that “gifted” is such a flat way of looking at things. I think that it only serves to label someone high functioning, so the people in charge can ignore any of their inaccessibility or ignorance when confronted by the person being hurt by it. I think that gifted is too often used as a measure of value, and is too often misaligned with merit. What about creativity? Dedication? Perseverance? Kindness? Open-mindedness? The most important qualities have no ruler to measure by.

I think “gifted” can go die in a hole. I’m not gifted. I’m ME. I’m curious, I’m dedicated, I’m strongwilled, I’m defiant, I’m kind, I’m compassionate, and I’m Autistic. And I make no apologies.

[bucketful-of-mental-illness-blog]

(This is going to be a very long and personal post (most of it is rambling though tbh), and I’ll be talking about possible triggers, namely depression, suicide, and eating disorders)

There are people who don’t take emotional support animals seriously. They might think that the person who needs one is just being to sensitive or a “special snowflake” or whatever. But I honestly wouldn’t be here without animals. Being autistic, I could never seem to understand people and how they function and socialize. But I could understand animals, I always could. I took a special interest in them ever since I was a baby. Growing up, I learned as much as I could about every animal I could. As my love for animals grew, the more I always needed one around me.

I didn’t get my first pet until I was 7. She was a stray kitten we met at our local shelter and I loved her. 2 years later, we got other cat. 3 and a half years later, I got my first dog. Soon, my sister and I took in a fish that my friend no longer wanted to care for. When I was 15, I got my first 2 pet mice, and my little sister got 2 hamsters. Throughout the years, I got more mice and my sister got more hamsters.

During that time in high school, I went through horrible depression. I’ve tried to kill myself more times than I could count. But I stayed for my pets. My dog loved me the most and my mice were completely dependent on me (my parents paid for my dogs and cats care, but everything for the mice were paid for and taken care of by me, as with my sister and her hamsters). They needed me, so I stayed. I also took better care of myself, because if I didn’t, then I wouldn’t be able to care for them.

Then I went to college. I had to leave all my pets behind. My mice fell into the care of my sister. In college, I felt so alone. I couldn’t make my own friends and I couldn’t have my pets with me. My depression came back horribly. I would just stay in bed all day, not even getting up to eat or shower. Only my anxiety could drag me out of bed to go to class. I felt so alone.

When I came back for summer, it was better, I had my dog, cats, and sisters hamsters (which I helped take care of). I also had some friends and their pets. But then I knew I had to go back to college soon, and I would be alone again. But my boyfriend knew how I felt, and he knew we were allowed fish in the dorms. He also knew my parents didn’t want me to get one (it was hard enough to convince them to rescue the one we took in from the friend). So he went out and bought me a fish tank for my birthday and I was so excited! I got the tank set up at home a few weeks before college started, and went out and bought a fish. The tank came with a coupon to get a veiltail male betta, making it about only $1, but the fish I wanted most was a sickly looking $15 halfmoon male betta. I came home with him, and my dad said it looked liked he wouldn’t survive more than 3 days. Well, when he went from the tiny, unfiltered, unheated cup, with minimal food, to a decorated, filtered, heated 3 gallon tank with proper food, he quickly lived up. Eventually, I upgraded him to a bigger five gallon tank with more decor and some live plants. It’s been almost a year since I’ve gotten him. 3 days my ass.

So then I went back to college for my sophomore year, I at least had my fish, so I was a bit better. I can’t take care of myself easily, but I will do anything for others. So I’d get out of bed to feed him, and I’d think “I might as well get myself some food while I’m up.” Or I’d be cleaning his tank and I’d either think “yea I should get myself cleaned up too” or “well now my arms feel kinda gross from them being in the tank water, so I really wanna go shower now.” And I’d actually do it. Which was a big accomplishment for me. To think that I should do something, and I could just go do it. Also, again, I started taking care of myself better, because I didn’t trust anyone else to take care of him right. So in order to take care of him, I took care of myself so I could be there for him.

But as much as I love my fish (and of course, still properly care for him) soon, it wasn’t enough. I needed something that could show me it loved me. Fish do have their own way of showing love, appreciation, and happiness, and I could recognize it and know when he was happy. But I needed something more physical. Something that could rub my face to say “I love you.” Without having that, I fell into horrible depression again. Staying in bed all day, not eating, not showering, sometimes not even doing the homework that my anxiety would usually force me to do.

My parents found out that I had depression. It was because they found out that I was looking to transfer colleges to be with my boyfriend, someone who I had known since 8th grade, became best friends in 10th grade, and started dating at the end of our senior year after we both accepted that we were queer and in love. He’s always been the best support system for me, so going to college with him was a way I could get better.

My parents just thought I wanted to be with my best friend, so they didn’t approve. I had to tell them that I was depressed and struggling at my current college, and if they wanted me to get better, they’d let me go. I also had to tell them that I needed something to take care of, or else I couldn’t take care of myself. I suggested getting an emotional support animal so I could bring it to college with me. After agreeing that none of our current pets would fit well in a dorm (my dog being very active, and both cats getting one, and one cat with several medical issues and the other not liking being confined to one room. They agreed to let me get another cat after the next semester ended (it was winter break when they found out).

That’s where the cat pictured above came in.

Two days ago, the semester ended, and I adopted that little kitten above. I regularly volunteered at my college’s local shelter, and fell in love with many of the cats there. It was hard for me to pick only one, but it ended up being the little black kitten with cataracts. I named her Nebula because it looked like she had little nebulas in her eyes (also after googling the definition of nebula right now, I found the name fits even more now because in medicine nebulas are “a clouded spot on the cornea causing defective vision” which is basically what she has).

Nebula (I’ve also been calling her Nebs or Nebby for short), turned out to be the perfect emotional support animal. She is almost constantly by my side, and loves to be held, cuddled, pet, played with, and she just demands attention. Which is exactly what I needed. Even when I feel alone, she’s right beside me ti remind me that I’m not alone, she’s there, and that she needs me. It’s only been 2 days, but we’ve already bonded very closely and she has made me so much happier. She loves to cuddle and she’ll just crawl up onto my lap or chest and just lay there and purr (which helps a lot with stress and anxiety). She’ll also follow me around the house to play or for pets. And if I don’t give her the attention she demands right away, she will walk in front of me, crawl on top of me and get in my face, and she has even jumped on my back while I was bent over and crawled up onto my shoulder when  started standing up. She is everything I could have wanted in a cat and she’s everything I needed. Very soon, I’ll be seeing a psychologist to get the proper paper work I need that says I need an esa so she can live with me at college.

So anyone who doesn’t believe esa’s are beneficial and can save lives, you can go fuck yourself. I’m alive today because of my pets, and my esa is going to make my life so much better. Not only am I a lot less likely to even attempt or think about suicide anymore, but I’m also a lot happier. No, my depression isn’t gone, but she makes it better, and she makes me want to keep living. Not only because she needs me, but also because she’s a reminder that other animals are going to need me too. I rescued her, and she rescued me.

I love my little Nebula ❤

[yes-dal456]

Doctors Weren't Listening To Somali Immigrants' Autism Concerns. Then Anti-Vaxxers Did.

Deeqa Hussein can’t put her finger on exactly how or when the vaccination disconnect happened in her community.

For years, the large number of Somali immigrant parents in the Twin Cities area vaccinated their children at rates as high as 92 percent ― outpacing virtually every other ethnic group. And then, Hussein said, many parents just stopped. 

“I felt like there was a lot fear and anxiety surrounding the MMR vaccine,” said Hussein, a special-education teacher with the Minneapolis Public Schools who also serves as the vice president of the local Somali Parents Autism Network and has two sons with autism.

“In the Somali community, it’s very close-knit,” she said. “Word of mouth is much more powerful.” 

Children of Somali descent in the Twin Cities are now vaccinated at about half the rate of non-Somali children. Those same children are the ones primarily affected by the ongoing measles outbreak in Minnesota that public health officials are scrambling to contain. 

The Minnesota Department of Public Health now provides a daily update of the increasing totals. As of May 10, there were 51 measles cases confirmed across three counties, with the majority clustered in Hennepin County. All but five of the cases are Somali Minnesotans, and nearly all of them are children. 

Public health experts and community advocates like Hussein all point to targeted, ongoing efforts by anti-vaccination activists like disgraced British doctor Andrew Wakefield and his disciples, who peddle anti-vaccine conspiracies like the widely discredited notion that vaccines contribute to autism risk. 

As public health officials look at how to contain the current outbreak and re-tool their outreach going forward, several acknowledge a crucial element that for years went overlooked in their interactions with the Somali community.

Minnesota’s first wave of Somali immigrants came in the 1990s during the country’s civil war ― less than a decade after several years of measles outbreaks in Somalia and neighboring countries like Kenya and Ethiopia affected hundreds of thousands of people. 

Somali Minnesotan vaccination rates remained among the highest of any group for the next two decades. Inexplicably, around 2008, Somali parents began to notice a cluster of autism cases in their community. Two years later, a special University of Minnesota project studying autism prevalence found that local Somali children aged 7 to 9 were identified as having ASD at a rate almost three times higher than the average population. 

It was a perfect storm for Wakefield and his acolytes to enter with convincing ― though debunked ― narratives about how the government was lying to parents about vaccine dangers, and measles are only temporary while autism is forever.

Before public health and scientific experts realized their data-based approach had failed to allay the concerns of the Somali community, the anti-vaccination activists had sized the narrative with answers of their own. 

“There’s nothing wrong with them, there’s something wrong with us,” Donna McAlpine, a University of Minnesota sociologist whose research includes the racial and ethnic disparities in health outcomes, said of those parents who chose to forego vaccinations.

McAlpine believes the scientific and public health community failed to really listen to Somali parents and internalize their concerns. In the early days of the autism cluster appearing, McAlpine heard numerous stories of Somali parents who felt their concerns about the condition weren’t landing with health officials. 

“A lot of parents felt that when they would go to a doctor or have contact with public health, it felt more like we were lecturing them: ‘Do you you know the science?’” McAlpine said. “In some ways, it was public health’s fault because we weren’t listening.”

Anti-vaccine activists like Wakefield and his followers entered, offering not just a listening ear but purported answers for why so many Somali children were developing autism. The activists held meetings at Somali restaurants and community centers, while local anti-vaccine groups like Vaccine Safety Council of Minnesota explained to worried parents their legal rights regarding vaccination exemption laws. 

McAlpine said the Somali community has long been forming groups in an effort to get science or health experts to pay attention to the autism rates in their community ― something Hussein separately confirmed. 

Now, that same audience is less interested in hearing the public health officials’ response to the measles outbreak.

“And it’s hard to turn it around because there’s such a distrust of the majority opinion because we weren’t paying attention,” McAlpine said. 

Kris Ehresman, director for infectious disease at the Minnesota Department of Public Health, said their response at the time focused on the safety of the vaccine for measles, mumps and rubella, or MMR.

Around 2008, Ehresman said, the anti-vaccine group started to target the community and has continued its efforts since.

“Even in the past couple weeks, during the outbreak, they’ve been providing misinformation. They’re very aggressive in their approach with the community,” Ehresman said. 

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Perceptions ― and stigma ― shape parents’ response

A 2014 University of Minnesota study that examined autism rates in children from the Hmong, Latino and Somali communities found that both Somali and white children had autism at higher rates than the overall population’s rate of 1 in 48. For Somali children, the rate was 1 in 32, and for white children, 1 in 36.

The disabilities and behavioral problems associated with autism were more severe, however, in Somali children. 

As a result, McAlpine said, the research did little to change the perception among Somali parents that their kids had autism at significantly higher rates than white children.

“White kids were more on the spectrum, like Asperger’s,” McAlpine said. “But the Somali kids had more severe intellectual disabilities and the behavioral problems associated with autism.”

While researchers don’t know why this is happening, some of the outcomes may correlate to how parents approach an ASD diagnosis. 

Hussein, the special-ed teacher who has two children with autism, said Somali parents don’t always acknowledge autism in their children as quickly as white parents, which can delay the young child getting speech and occupational therapy or help with life skills. 

“It’s a stigma, like, ‘What have you done in the past for your child to have this?’” Husseun said. “People that don’t vaccinate their kids are the ones who already have a sibling with autism.” 

Hussein said families with children who have autism can be isolated, with other families avoiding play dates or shaming a child’s autistic behavior that can manifest as aggression or speech difficulties.

“My name isn’t Deeqa — I’m ‘Deeqa with the two boys with autism,’” she said. She added, “I don’t go to mosque with them.”

Despite the fact that the current measles outbreak has even led to hospitalizations, Hussein said the feelings within the community about the safety of vaccines are divided ― and raw.

Not everyone is ignorant. Not everyone is refusing to vaccinate their children.” Deeqa Hussein, vice president of the Somali Parents Autism Network

“Some parents say, ‘I grew up in Somalia, I wasn’t vaccinated and I don’t have autism.’ And they accuse pro-vaccination people of corruption,” Hussein said. 

And while nothing holds as much sway in the community as recommendations from other parents, those who extol the virtues of vaccination are sometimes treated with suspicion by the vaccination-averse parents they’re trying to convince. 

“I really think they took advantage of the community’s anxieties here,” Ehresman, of the Minnesota Department of Public Health, said of the anti-vaccination groups. But she said this kind of science-skeptical response echoes trends seen more broadly than just in Minneapolis.

A new approach: ‘Spouting data doesn’t cut it’ 

“Years ago, you could be scientist, you could provide data, you could make a recommendation, and that was enough to convince the public about an issue. That’s no longer the case,” Ehresman said. “The public just has a different view of science now, whether it’s climate change or anything. It used to be that science is science ― it’s apolitical.” 

Ultimately, she said, public health officials have learned from measles outbreaks and are adjusting their approach. The MDPH has hired a member of the Somali community as an outreach coordinator, while the department is working with Somali community and faith leaders to help engage with parents who have concerns or questions. 

“Just sort of spouting off data doesn’t cut it. It’s about narrative and it’s about telling stories,” Ehresman said. “Part of the lesson learned was the community engagement and having them say, ‘This is what we need, this is what’s important to us.’”

Hussein said she hopes to see more outreach from the scientific community, as well as training of clinicians and pediatricians in cultural competency “to take the fear out of vaccination.” 

Ultimately, she said, she doesn’t want the Somali community to be defined by the outbreak.

“Not everyone is ignorant,” she said. “Not everyone is refusing to vaccinate their children.”

-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

from http://ift.tt/2pC3335 from Blogger http://ift.tt/2r3vKGu

[ongames]

Doctors Weren't Listening To Somali Immigrants' Autism Concerns. Then Anti-Vaxxers Did.

Deeqa Hussein can’t put her finger on exactly how or when the vaccination disconnect happened in her community.

For years, the large number of Somali immigrant parents in the Twin Cities area vaccinated their children at rates as high as 92 percent ― outpacing virtually every other ethnic group. And then, Hussein said, many parents just stopped. 

“I felt like there was a lot fear and anxiety surrounding the MMR vaccine,” said Hussein, a special-education teacher with the Minneapolis Public Schools who also serves as the vice president of the local Somali Parents Autism Network and has two sons with autism.

“In the Somali community, it’s very close-knit,” she said. “Word of mouth is much more powerful.” 

Children of Somali descent in the Twin Cities are now vaccinated at about half the rate of non-Somali children. Those same children are the ones primarily affected by the ongoing measles outbreak in Minnesota that public health officials are scrambling to contain. 

The Minnesota Department of Public Health now provides a daily update of the increasing totals. As of May 10, there were 51 measles cases confirmed across three counties, with the majority clustered in Hennepin County. All but five of the cases are Somali Minnesotans, and nearly all of them are children. 

Public health experts and community advocates like Hussein all point to targeted, ongoing efforts by anti-vaccination activists like disgraced British doctor Andrew Wakefield and his disciples, who peddle anti-vaccine conspiracies like the widely discredited notion that vaccines contribute to autism risk. 

As public health officials look at how to contain the current outbreak and re-tool their outreach going forward, several acknowledge a crucial element that for years went overlooked in their interactions with the Somali community.

Minnesota’s first wave of Somali immigrants came in the 1990s during the country’s civil war ― less than a decade after several years of measles outbreaks in Somalia and neighboring countries like Kenya and Ethiopia affected hundreds of thousands of people. 

Somali Minnesotan vaccination rates remained among the highest of any group for the next two decades. Inexplicably, around 2008, Somali parents began to notice a cluster of autism cases in their community. Two years later, a special University of Minnesota project studying autism prevalence found that local Somali children aged 7 to 9 were identified as having ASD at a rate almost three times higher than the average population. 

It was a perfect storm for Wakefield and his acolytes to enter with convincing ― though debunked ― narratives about how the government was lying to parents about vaccine dangers, and measles are only temporary while autism is forever.

Before public health and scientific experts realized their data-based approach had failed to allay the concerns of the Somali community, the anti-vaccination activists had sized the narrative with answers of their own. 

“There’s nothing wrong with them, there’s something wrong with us,” Donna McAlpine, a University of Minnesota sociologist whose research includes the racial and ethnic disparities in health outcomes, said of those parents who chose to forego vaccinations.

McAlpine believes the scientific and public health community failed to really listen to Somali parents and internalize their concerns. In the early days of the autism cluster appearing, McAlpine heard numerous stories of Somali parents who felt their concerns about the condition weren’t landing with health officials. 

“A lot of parents felt that when they would go to a doctor or have contact with public health, it felt more like we were lecturing them: ‘Do you you know the science?’” McAlpine said. “In some ways, it was public health’s fault because we weren’t listening.”

Anti-vaccine activists like Wakefield and his followers entered, offering not just a listening ear but purported answers for why so many Somali children were developing autism. The activists held meetings at Somali restaurants and community centers, while local anti-vaccine groups like Vaccine Safety Council of Minnesota explained to worried parents their legal rights regarding vaccination exemption laws. 

McAlpine said the Somali community has long been forming groups in an effort to get science or health experts to pay attention to the autism rates in their community ― something Hussein separately confirmed. 

Now, that same audience is less interested in hearing the public health officials’ response to the measles outbreak.

“And it’s hard to turn it around because there’s such a distrust of the majority opinion because we weren’t paying attention,” McAlpine said. 

Kris Ehresman, director for infectious disease at the Minnesota Department of Public Health, said their response at the time focused on the safety of the vaccine for measles, mumps and rubella, or MMR.

Around 2008, Ehresman said, the anti-vaccine group started to target the community and has continued its efforts since.

“Even in the past couple weeks, during the outbreak, they’ve been providing misinformation. They’re very aggressive in their approach with the community,” Ehresman said. 

Perceptions ― and stigma ― shape parents’ response

A 2014 University of Minnesota study that examined autism rates in children from the Hmong, Latino and Somali communities found that both Somali and white children had autism at higher rates than the overall population’s rate of 1 in 48. For Somali children, the rate was 1 in 32, and for white children, 1 in 36.

The disabilities and behavioral problems associated with autism were more severe, however, in Somali children. 

As a result, McAlpine said, the research did little to change the perception among Somali parents that their kids had autism at significantly higher rates than white children.

“White kids were more on the spectrum, like Asperger’s,” McAlpine said. “But the Somali kids had more severe intellectual disabilities and the behavioral problems associated with autism.”

While researchers don’t know why this is happening, some of the outcomes may correlate to how parents approach an ASD diagnosis. 

Hussein, the special-ed teacher who has two children with autism, said Somali parents don’t always acknowledge autism in their children as quickly as white parents, which can delay the young child getting speech and occupational therapy or help with life skills. 

“It’s a stigma, like, ‘What have you done in the past for your child to have this?’” Husseun said. “People that don’t vaccinate their kids are the ones who already have a sibling with autism.” 

Hussein said families with children who have autism can be isolated, with other families avoiding play dates or shaming a child’s autistic behavior that can manifest as aggression or speech difficulties.

“My name isn’t Deeqa — I’m ‘Deeqa with the two boys with autism,’” she said. She added, “I don’t go to mosque with them.”

Despite the fact that the current measles outbreak has even led to hospitalizations, Hussein said the feelings within the community about the safety of vaccines are divided ― and raw.

Not everyone is ignorant. Not everyone is refusing to vaccinate their children.” Deeqa Hussein, vice president of the Somali Parents Autism Network

“Some parents say, ‘I grew up in Somalia, I wasn’t vaccinated and I don’t have autism.’ And they accuse pro-vaccination people of corruption,” Hussein said. 

And while nothing holds as much sway in the community as recommendations from other parents, those who extol the virtues of vaccination are sometimes treated with suspicion by the vaccination-averse parents they’re trying to convince. 

“I really think they took advantage of the community’s anxieties here,” Ehresman, of the Minnesota Department of Public Health, said of the anti-vaccination groups. But she said this kind of science-skeptical response echoes trends seen more broadly than just in Minneapolis.

A new approach: ‘Spouting data doesn’t cut it’ 

“Years ago, you could be scientist, you could provide data, you could make a recommendation, and that was enough to convince the public about an issue. That’s no longer the case,” Ehresman said. “The public just has a different view of science now, whether it’s climate change or anything. It used to be that science is science ― it’s apolitical.” 

Ultimately, she said, public health officials have learned from measles outbreaks and are adjusting their approach. The MDPH has hired a member of the Somali community as an outreach coordinator, while the department is working with Somali community and faith leaders to help engage with parents who have concerns or questions. 

“Just sort of spouting off data doesn’t cut it. It’s about narrative and it’s about telling stories,” Ehresman said. “Part of the lesson learned was the community engagement and having them say, ‘This is what we need, this is what’s important to us.’”

Hussein said she hopes to see more outreach from the scientific community, as well as training of clinicians and pediatricians in cultural competency “to take the fear out of vaccination.” 

Ultimately, she said, she doesn’t want the Somali community to be defined by the outbreak.

“Not everyone is ignorant,” she said. “Not everyone is refusing to vaccinate their children.”

-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

Doctors Weren't Listening To Somali Immigrants' Autism Concerns. Then Anti-Vaxxers Did. published first on http://ift.tt/2lnpciY

[imreviewblog]

Doctors Weren't Listening To Somali Immigrants' Autism Concerns. Then Anti-Vaxxers Did.

Deeqa Hussein can’t put her finger on exactly how or when the vaccination disconnect happened in her community.

For years, the large number of Somali immigrant parents in the Twin Cities area vaccinated their children at rates as high as 92 percent ― outpacing virtually every other ethnic group. And then, Hussein said, many parents just stopped. 

“I felt like there was a lot fear and anxiety surrounding the MMR vaccine,” said Hussein, a special-education teacher with the Minneapolis Public Schools who also serves as the vice president of the local Somali Parents Autism Network and has two sons with autism.

“In the Somali community, it’s very close-knit,” she said. “Word of mouth is much more powerful.” 

Children of Somali descent in the Twin Cities are now vaccinated at about half the rate of non-Somali children. Those same children are the ones primarily affected by the ongoing measles outbreak in Minnesota that public health officials are scrambling to contain. 

The Minnesota Department of Public Health now provides a daily update of the increasing totals. As of May 10, there were 51 measles cases confirmed across three counties, with the majority clustered in Hennepin County. All but five of the cases are Somali Minnesotans, and nearly all of them are children. 

Public health experts and community advocates like Hussein all point to targeted, ongoing efforts by anti-vaccination activists like disgraced British doctor Andrew Wakefield and his disciples, who peddle anti-vaccine conspiracies like the widely discredited notion that vaccines contribute to autism risk. 

As public health officials look at how to contain the current outbreak and re-tool their outreach going forward, several acknowledge a crucial element that for years went overlooked in their interactions with the Somali community.

Minnesota’s first wave of Somali immigrants came in the 1990s during the country’s civil war ― less than a decade after several years of measles outbreaks in Somalia and neighboring countries like Kenya and Ethiopia affected hundreds of thousands of people. 

Somali Minnesotan vaccination rates remained among the highest of any group for the next two decades. Inexplicably, around 2008, Somali parents began to notice a cluster of autism cases in their community. Two years later, a special University of Minnesota project studying autism prevalence found that local Somali children aged 7 to 9 were identified as having ASD at a rate almost three times higher than the average population. 

It was a perfect storm for Wakefield and his acolytes to enter with convincing ― though debunked ― narratives about how the government was lying to parents about vaccine dangers, and measles are only temporary while autism is forever.

Before public health and scientific experts realized their data-based approach had failed to allay the concerns of the Somali community, the anti-vaccination activists had sized the narrative with answers of their own. 

“There’s nothing wrong with them, there’s something wrong with us,” Donna McAlpine, a University of Minnesota sociologist whose research includes the racial and ethnic disparities in health outcomes, said of those parents who chose to forego vaccinations.

McAlpine believes the scientific and public health community failed to really listen to Somali parents and internalize their concerns. In the early days of the autism cluster appearing, McAlpine heard numerous stories of Somali parents who felt their concerns about the condition weren’t landing with health officials. 

“A lot of parents felt that when they would go to a doctor or have contact with public health, it felt more like we were lecturing them: ‘Do you you know the science?’” McAlpine said. “In some ways, it was public health’s fault because we weren’t listening.”

Anti-vaccine activists like Wakefield and his followers entered, offering not just a listening ear but purported answers for why so many Somali children were developing autism. The activists held meetings at Somali restaurants and community centers, while local anti-vaccine groups like Vaccine Safety Council of Minnesota explained to worried parents their legal rights regarding vaccination exemption laws. 

McAlpine said the Somali community has long been forming groups in an effort to get science or health experts to pay attention to the autism rates in their community ― something Hussein separately confirmed. 

Now, that same audience is less interested in hearing the public health officials’ response to the measles outbreak.

“And it’s hard to turn it around because there’s such a distrust of the majority opinion because we weren’t paying attention,” McAlpine said. 

Kris Ehresman, director for infectious disease at the Minnesota Department of Public Health, said their response at the time focused on the safety of the vaccine for measles, mumps and rubella, or MMR.

Around 2008, Ehresman said, the anti-vaccine group started to target the community and has continued its efforts since.

“Even in the past couple weeks, during the outbreak, they’ve been providing misinformation. They’re very aggressive in their approach with the community,” Ehresman said. 

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Perceptions ― and stigma ― shape parents’ response

A 2014 University of Minnesota study that examined autism rates in children from the Hmong, Latino and Somali communities found that both Somali and white children had autism at higher rates than the overall population’s rate of 1 in 48. For Somali children, the rate was 1 in 32, and for white children, 1 in 36.

The disabilities and behavioral problems associated with autism were more severe, however, in Somali children. 

As a result, McAlpine said, the research did little to change the perception among Somali parents that their kids had autism at significantly higher rates than white children.

“White kids were more on the spectrum, like Asperger’s,” McAlpine said. “But the Somali kids had more severe intellectual disabilities and the behavioral problems associated with autism.”

While researchers don’t know why this is happening, some of the outcomes may correlate to how parents approach an ASD diagnosis. 

Hussein, the special-ed teacher who has two children with autism, said Somali parents don’t always acknowledge autism in their children as quickly as white parents, which can delay the young child getting speech and occupational therapy or help with life skills. 

“It’s a stigma, like, ‘What have you done in the past for your child to have this?’” Husseun said. “People that don’t vaccinate their kids are the ones who already have a sibling with autism.” 

Hussein said families with children who have autism can be isolated, with other families avoiding play dates or shaming a child’s autistic behavior that can manifest as aggression or speech difficulties.

“My name isn’t Deeqa — I’m ‘Deeqa with the two boys with autism,’” she said. She added, “I don’t go to mosque with them.”

Despite the fact that the current measles outbreak has even led to hospitalizations, Hussein said the feelings within the community about the safety of vaccines are divided ― and raw.

Not everyone is ignorant. Not everyone is refusing to vaccinate their children.” Deeqa Hussein, vice president of the Somali Parents Autism Network

“Some parents say, ‘I grew up in Somalia, I wasn’t vaccinated and I don’t have autism.’ And they accuse pro-vaccination people of corruption,” Hussein said. 

And while nothing holds as much sway in the community as recommendations from other parents, those who extol the virtues of vaccination are sometimes treated with suspicion by the vaccination-averse parents they’re trying to convince. 

“I really think they took advantage of the community’s anxieties here,” Ehresman, of the Minnesota Department of Public Health, said of the anti-vaccination groups. But she said this kind of science-skeptical response echoes trends seen more broadly than just in Minneapolis.

A new approach: ‘Spouting data doesn’t cut it’ 

“Years ago, you could be scientist, you could provide data, you could make a recommendation, and that was enough to convince the public about an issue. That’s no longer the case,” Ehresman said. “The public just has a different view of science now, whether it’s climate change or anything. It used to be that science is science ― it’s apolitical.” 

Ultimately, she said, public health officials have learned from measles outbreaks and are adjusting their approach. The MDPH has hired a member of the Somali community as an outreach coordinator, while the department is working with Somali community and faith leaders to help engage with parents who have concerns or questions. 

“Just sort of spouting off data doesn’t cut it. It’s about narrative and it’s about telling stories,” Ehresman said. “Part of the lesson learned was the community engagement and having them say, ‘This is what we need, this is what’s important to us.’”

Hussein said she hopes to see more outreach from the scientific community, as well as training of clinicians and pediatricians in cultural competency “to take the fear out of vaccination.” 

Ultimately, she said, she doesn’t want the Somali community to be defined by the outbreak.

“Not everyone is ignorant,” she said. “Not everyone is refusing to vaccinate their children.”

-- This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

from Healthy Living - The Huffington Post http://huff.to/2pARRTn