#and now crippling anxiety!

[shmaptainwrites]

someone pls remind me that it is NEVER a good idea to drink coffee no matter how enticing

[emo-batboy]

Things Battinson Totally Did During His First Year of University

Using Unhinged or Odd Things I Also Did as a College Freshman :D

Note: for this list, let’s believe Bruce was living in an (admittedly expensive and swanky) dorm because it is required for first-years, especially those entering at a young age, and Alfred told him he needed to make friends. Also yes I did every single thing on this list. I never claimed to be a role model

Bruce, to his TA: I’m so sorry I’m late to class. I gave blood a few hours ago and almost fainted on the way here, but it won’t happen again.

Signs up for a class called “Age of Dinosaurs” despite it not being required whatsoever and proceeds to work his entire schedule around it

Bruce: Your mental health is super important. If you think you should see the on-campus therapist, go see them. Friend: Fine. I’ll sign up for therapy if you sign up for therapy too. Bruce: Hold on-

Finds a loophole in his housing contract that allows him to get a pet frog, calls him kermit :)

Gets a second frog because Kermit was lonely, names it Constantine after Muppets Most Wanted, then realizes that they’re gay for each other. Wonders if the rainbow-colored rocks he got them triggered anything

Swings dramatically between calling Alfred every single day and ghosting him for weeks, cries when he realizes what he did

“Accidentally” joins the student body council, doesn’t know what he’s doing, gets re-elected anyway

Molds a dragon out of Laffy Taffy instead of doing his work

Bruce: *joins Honors, gets all A’s, takes the max amount of classes, has several minors, overachieves* Also Bruce: I’m a failure.

Breaks into a building after hours to study because NO ONE KNOWS HOW TO SHUT THE FUCK UP AT THE LIBRARY

Bruce: I will not get seasonal depression this year. Bruce: *gets real and seasonal depression that year*

Meticulously schedules his day with a color-coded planner because if he sits down for too long, the thoughts will consume him

Gives a presentation to his rhetoric class on how much he likes Spider-Man: Into the Spiderverse (it is 20 minutes long)

Successfully allocates funding from the student body council to pay for free feminine products in the dorms OUT OF SPITE because someone said it couldn't be done. fuck you, Andrew

Bruce: It is not an all-nighter if I go to sleep before my first class. Friend: It is 7:30am, the sun is in the sky, and your first class is at 12:30. Bruce: But I am getting sleep.

Refuses to go anywhere without his backpack because what if he needs three notebooks at once

Loses over 20 pounds because ✨stress✨ and scares the shit out of Alfred when he comes home for Thanksgiving

Argues with his TA over the one (1) question he got wrong on his Dinosaur exam

Bruce, calling Alfred: Hello father figure. How do I do taxes? Do I have to do them myself? Also, I think I’m having a panic attack.

Joins in on a charity arts-and-crafts project that gives kids books with matching activities made by volunteers, proceeds to commandeer the project because “it’s not color-blind friendly” and rewrites the instructions for everyone

Makes a murder wall

Goes to one (1) sports game and proceeds to leave in the first ten minutes because it’s way too loud wtf is wrong with people

Professor, addressing the lecture hall: I dare you to write an essay about these two sentences. Bruce: *writes an essay about six words, gets a 100, never even read the book*

Crawls into the ceiling for some alone time

Ghosts someone after a date because he’s too scared to tell them he didn’t know it was a date in the first place and now he feels bad

Classmate: How tf does he walk across campus that fast? I go in the same direction he does on my bike, and he’s always ahead of me. Bruce: *is gay sprinting to Dinosaur class*

Refuses to let others use his Favorite Pen TM

Constantly gets mistaken for a Grad Student because he is “so wise and mature” (bestie, that’s the autism)

Alfred: *casually mentions he got into a car accident through text* Bruce: *replies with a meme while hyperventilating because he doesn’t know what to do with that information??!*

Wears a suit to one of his finals

Regularly eats non-organic food for the first time in his life, proceeds to learn about several allergies Alfred forgot to mention he has

Writes “What is a Hot Pocket?” in calligraphy and proceeds to laugh his ass off alone in his dorm because he is so exhausted he’s reached the point of delusion

Locks himself out of his dorm right before class, frantically asks the floor group chat if someone can help, proceeds to tell the nice gay man on the floor who saved him “I love you” because his social skills have hit rock bottom

Makes a little music album display next to his desk for his favorite band (Nirvana) His friends call it a shrine, and they are technically correct

Has a blacklist of people he refuses to interact with because Reasons

Counselor: What do you want to do when you graduate? Bruce: *gestures vaguely*

Refuses to take the bus because there are people in there and he doesn’t like those

Loses one of his frogs, how tf did he do that, they’re fully aquatic, oh fuck, this is probably why they got rid of that loophole a year later because unbeknownst to Bruce, he accidentally started a frog revolution in the dorms, btw he SWEARS he did not mean to do that

Has two trash cans in his room: one for the Good Garbage, and one for the Bad Garbage. Only Bruce knows which is which

Bruce: *writes a creative piece about a ship’s final thoughts as it sinks, bringing its passengers down with it* TA: Absolutely lovely, Bruce, but are you okay?

Goes on Night Walks, keeps himself safe by maintaining a level 12 resting bitch face at all times

Earns the nickname “8th floor cryptid” after pacing the halls at 3am when it’s too cold for Night Walks (honestly tho how tf didn’t he get the nickname earlier?)

Bruce: Do you think a depressed person could do this? Bruce: *has a manic episode*

Okay that's all love you BYE

[saucy-mesothelioma]

Fuck it, Slay the Princess freeform poems

[clownsuu]

I can explain that "Die you don't belong in this world." And the anon meant well.

You know that castlevania meme that's like.

"What's is a man, a miserable pile of secrets. But enough talk *throws win glass* HAVE AT YOU"

That's from the end of a long conversation between Richter and Dracula. The full conversation goes like this.

R: Die monster, you don't belong in this world.

D: It is not by my hand that I am once again given flesh. I was brought back by humans who wished to give me tribute.

R: TRIBUTE? You steal men's souls man make them you're slaves.

D: Perhaps the same can be said of all religions.

R: Your words are as empty as your soul, mankind ill needs a savior such as you.

D: What is a man, a miserable little pile of secrets. But enough talk *throws glass* HAVE AT YOU.

They were just making a joke about Home being a vampire.

Oh!

My, my apologies then to that anon then! Having adhd and bein on the spectrum makes me very oblivious to things sometimes unless it has been credited to what it's originally from (or currently trending)

[dragonpyre]

There's advanced reading group in elementary school and then there's "you and literally one other kid get sent to a study room to read a high school level book" reading group.

And then you wonder why I'm so high achieving...

[asketchydomesticatedgremlin]

spire climbers

[noblemalone]

this one is for all the freaky lil eggheads out there - i see you

yes he got a promotion to store manager it’s for Plot Reasons ok

3 solas attempting to start a union + one canon egg

[citruslullabies]

Guys are there any Fics of reader x Cooper Howard where the reader isn't .. like, a freshly turned 18 year old??

[sentientsliotar]

So the important thing is not to panic-

Only have a few clips but I already know he’s the perfect Grover

[sunnibits]

!!!!!!

[todayisafridaynight]

no ones ever gonna understand how much i love daigo doin this stupid shit after dissolving the tojo

[helyeahmangocheese]

there's probably something mental illness going on with all of us attaching to this boy that had a real reason to believe in his own death approaching at the age 16 and sure as hell acting like it in like a self sacrificial way.

how many of you are eldest sisters again?

[citrine-elephant]

hmnghhhmmmm mmmm the temptation. the urge. to chew on the sexy miserable blond man. strangle him, toss him around. stress toy. squeaky toy. that's all the bows want yknow. leon squeaky toy kennedy. stress boytoy.

[greendest1ny]

usually if something significant enough happens to me i make it happen to garmadon but i'm not letting that fuck take antidepressants. i hate him too much /j

[clownsuu]

I hope this question doesn't make you uncomfortable (extremely sorry if it does) but do you see howdy and wally as a couple? Your art of them is very sweet and I love it a lot

[looks at all my tagged ship art of them and then back at u]

yes HDGDGSH-

[devilbrakers]

wip day;

tagged by @quickhacked, @katsigian and @lucien-lachance!! thank you all <3 i actually have something share this week 😁 a friend requested sunako and dick's first date so here's what i have of the draft so far:

Maybe she shouldn’t have come. It certainly would’ve been easier, or so she thinks. It would’ve spared her this stomach-burning anxiety as she waits outside this diner and the potential humiliation of saying the wrong thing. She always says the wrong thing. But then would’ve come the awkwardness of seeing him again had she blown him off, and the overwhelming guilt of doing so. Plus, Keigo would be disappointed after convincing her to come tonight. Seems she can’t win either way especially now that he’s late. Well… late by two minutes, but still late. She’s been standing outside the diner for twenty minutes, watching people come and go or walk down the sidewalk beside her. She should move, she’s in people’s way but she feels frozen as she waits for him. It’s starting to rain, just a light sprinkle from the sky but enough for the temperature to start to drop and the smell in the air to shift. It’s a welcome change compared to the usual stench of Gotham. She considers texting him but instead brings a hand up to her mouth to bite her nails, though they’re already almost bitten down to the plate. It’s hard to tell with how pitch black the skin is anyway. It's unsightly; she should put her gloves back on.

tagging: @time-is-a-lake @vvanessaives @mrs-theirin @celticwoman @dameayliins @gothimp @druidgroves @aztarion @pitchmoss and whoever else would like to join!