#and not being reminded that people are the worst

[zeldasnotes]

Venus aspecting Chiron

Check out ⮕ Venus aspecting Neptune & Venus aspecting Pluto

READ BEFORE YOU PROCEED: This post is is written about the conjunction between Venus & Chiron but people with Square & other aspects might relate to some of it, hence the title. This post contains both positive and negative observations. These are my personal observations and NOT facts. The whole chart has to be taken into consideration.

These people were often hurt in some way by their first love which had a huge negative effect on their self esteem. Most time the rejection was because of something that had to do with their looks or social status. It can be something super small like ”I dont like girls with glasses” but it still hurt.

This rejection often leads to a lot of years spent on trying to prove that they have worth by dating a lot of people or doing everything they can to look and be perfect. Or in worst case even letting themselves be used.

This pain also leads to them thinking that love is supposed to be painful. So they dont see the issue when their partner hurts them.

They are very sensitive and very good at putting themselves in other peoples shoes. They remind me a lot of Venus/Neptune. Because of this they often go for people who are broken or even problematic, because they see the person behind all of that.

People with this who are attracted to women will either be attracted to the damsel in distress or the stone cold bitch. Because both of these ”archetypes” are someone who needs healing.

They might be attracted to partners that cant be with them so they can keep this cycle of being rejected because thats all they know. OR they can also go for people who doesnt deserve them at all because they are so scared of rejection they might want someone whos ”glad to have them”.

Their low self worth not only affect their love life and social life but also their finances. Deep down they dont believe they deserve money which can make them less motivated to get money or spend it as soon as they get it.

Women with this aspect might have a feeling of not being a ”real woman”. Might feel like they arent feminine enough or not like other women. They can also be uncomfortable with people who act stereotypically ”feminine”.

There could have been a lot of competition between women in their family or even their own mother or siblings competing with them resulting in very painful experiences with women.

Their vulnerability is shown in them often having neotony and high trust facial features such as elevated brow ridges, prominent cheekbones, lower upper facial width-to-height ratio, rounded features and open lips. Which makes them the epitome of male gaze leading to a sex symbol status. Some of the biggest sex symbols have this placement. Ana de Armas, Sydney Sweeney, Megan Fox & Marilyn Monroe all share these features. And they have this placement.

Actresses with this aspect tend to do a lot of sex scenes bc they understand how to convey sex in a way others dont since they are extra sensitive to anything that has to do with art, sex and presentation. For example: Ana De Armas & Sydney Sweeney.

They also tend to do a lot of sex scenes because they want to ”give the buyer what they want” because of their strong need to please people using their looks(Venus). Bc of this they can be very easily talked into doing any kinds of scenes the producer wants.

For some reason people might like to diss their appearance. And when there isnt something to say, people will find something because Chiron shows where people subconsciously hurt us bc of sensing a vulnerability.

Olivia Rodrigo who have this aspect herself wrote a song that describes how these people usually feel: ”When pretty isn't pretty enough, what do you do? And everybody's keepin' it up, so you think it's you, I could change up my body and change up my face. I could try every lipstick in every shade. But I'd always feel the same. Cause pretty isn't pretty enough anyways” 🎼

They can be very drawn to plastic surgery & beauty procedures because they want to be perfect and they think outer beauty can heal their inner wound.

A misconception I often see about this placement is that people think this aspect would make someone unattractive. Thats definitely not the case. Usually the opposite from what Ive seen both irl and on celebrities.

Pain surrounding beauty doesnt have to be because of being unattractive. Being noticed too much for being goodlooking can lead to similar issues with self esteem. For example the poor Jon Benet Ramsey had this aspect and her mom made her dress up in adult clothes and makeup for beauty pageants. She was noticed for her appearance way too early.

Too much focus on their appearance in their childhood can lead to these people rejecting beauty completely. I have a friend with this aspect shes gorgeous and shes never colored her hair, never wears lashes or nails etc because she rejects everything connected to ”Venus”. (Not saying women have to or should like those things but its common my age)

So there are two types of Venus/Chiron people. Those who are almost obsessed with being good looking and those who reject it completely. Also those who are obsessed with money and those who reject money completely.

A lot of these people also let their appearance hinder them bc of things that are only in their head. Like not wearing t shirts or shorts bc of insecurities surrounding their bodies that nobody else sees.

The positive part with this aspect is that these people are usually very charming, kind and empathic. They are also very skilled artists because they understand art like nobody else.

When they finally heal their issues with femininity and worth they can finally flourish.

©️ 2024 Zeldas Notes All Rights Reserved

[fanaticalthings]

Hey, boss! Quick thought: Jason and Cass are basically Irish twins and Jason is totally that little brother who acts like her older brother/dad and she only lets him do it because its endearing.

Like he consistently shows up at all of her ballet recitals with a bouquet of flowers.

And he takes her out for ice cream when she comes back from a particularly long mission and he knows that the batgirls are unavailable.

And he can tell when she's feeling down about something so he takes her out on his motorbike for wordless drives.

But she's also not afraid of calling little brother just to remind him every now and then.

And he's learnt not to invite her to play video games, unless she's feeling particularly out of touch/having worries about her self-worth, because she will destroy him every time. He doesn't even need to pretend (not that he ever would obviously)

Ahhh I actually really love the idea of Cass and Jason being really close (although it probably wouldn't work out if you still hc Jason as a crimelord/killer) but just the thought that they both understand each other in ways that the others might not is a really nice thought I think.

I also LOVE to hc Cass as the older one, especially since Jason seems like he'd be the older one considering he looks like a fucking 6'4" linebacker that could take you out with one slap

Also also, just based on their canon interpretations as of right now, I actually would LOVE to see an exploration of their characters when put together.

Cass was raised and abused by her father to be a ruthless killing machine since birth, and yet she still turned out to be an incredibly empathetic person who believes anyone can change for the better.

Jason, when he was young also had a rough childhood (grew up in the slums of Gotham, had a father with a criminal background and a mother who succumbed to drug abuse) he'd basically witnessed the worst of Gotham and still believed in the good of people when he was Robin.

In the current comics, Jason heavily wants to turn his lifestyle around, going non-lethal and trying to get away from the more questionable actions of his past. I think it would be super interesting to have Cass empathize with wanting to escape the dark parts of yourself with Jason and also have Jason see his younger self in Cass with how she vehemently strives to save everyone like how he did long ago.

I would so be down for a lil duo run of these two. Maybe have them relate to each other with the roughness of their childhoods or have them explore/share the struggles of trying to better yourself when it feels like everything is against you.

[marmota-b]

Glitch IS meant to be Force sensitive, here's why

Clone Trooper Glitch Who Is Definitely Force Sensitive.

As far as I can tell, everyone has fallen in love with that idea and everyone is now saying "Glitch is Force sensitive and you can't convince me otherwise."

Listen, what if I can actually convince you he is, with literary analysis?

I don't think I've ever seen this particular angle discussed (not that I have looked too hard, but no one ever brings it up when talking about Glitch). Everyone just loves the idea that he's Force sensitive because it's a lovely / exciting idea. And, okay, it's never stated outright in the source material, so there's some room for doubt. (And it was obviously intentionally left open-ended.)

BUT

I think the subtext, for those who know what it is, is so thick it might as well be an open admission of authorial intent. You see, Glitch's comic, Defenders of the Lost Temple, is drawing heavily on the Knights of the Old Republic comics in its lore. The Gauntlet they're sent to recover comes from that series. The moon where it resides is named after one of the characters from the series and likely is the moon he moved to at the end of his arc, and there's a statue of him there. There are all these deliberate, easily proven links to the series.

And there's also the less direct but still present parallel of questioning whether Jedi should be fighting in a war at all - Knights of the Old Republic (comics) takes place at the beginning of the Mandalorian Wars when some Jedi went to fight and others argued that wasn't their place, and some people get caught in the conflict without ever wanting to. That's a more dubious connection, and may not have been deliberate, but...

That is - the writer knew what he was doing here, in relation to previously published material.

The main protagonist of that series is Zayne Carrick.

Zayne is a sort of off-beat Jedi (well, almost-Jedi). He is just about Force sensitive enough to be admitted to the Jedi Order. He has "a special relationship with the Force." His special relationship with the Force mainly manifests in him being very clumsy and having the worst sort of luck. No one really thinks he'll make it as a Jedi. His own fellow padawan friends don't think he'll make it as a Jedi. But he's so good and caring and trying. And in the long run, he learns to work with his bad luck, and it turns out it's not so much a bad luck as the Force working... as a sort of swing, around him, with a balance of good and bad events. Things rarely work out as expected, but he learns to expect the unexpected. And once he does, and learns to ride the waves instead of trying to swim against the current, it actually works mainly in the heroes' favour.

Does that remind you of anyone?

Yep.

I'm pretty sure Glitch is a deliberate callback to Zayne Carrick and his special relationship with the Force.

I don't know if he started out that way from the start, or if the idea of "what if a clone was Force sensitive" came first and this theme just slotted into place later (honestly, the latter is probably likelier). But it's undeniably there; with all the other references to KOTOR, it's unlikely the author would have missed the main protagonist's character arc re: Force sensitivity.

Glitch has a special relationship with the Force exactly like Zayne's. He just has, unlike Zayne, also the bad luck of never having been tested for Force sensitivity. (This is all EU/Legends. Don't expect New Canon to stick to any of the above.)

[mueritos]

Hi Matteo,

I just wanted to say that I really appreciated the most recent comic you posted. It feels like it came at the perfect time for me lol. I’m in a bit of a transitional stage right now(in many ways) and I’ve basically gotten used to feeling like I’m disconnected and free floating. I know it won’t always be like that but it’s been rough. I have a friend who’s also a trans guy, though he transitioned several years before me and is now stealth, and though I cherish his friendship and appreciate his support, I sometimes find it hard to relate to his experience as a white guy with supportive parents. To some extent, my queerness has always felt very separate to my identity as a child of Mexican immigrants. I recently got the chance to visit family in Mexico and despite loving the experience, I was just so uncomfortable the entire time having to present as a girl. I’ve been trying to build up the courage to tell my parents that I’m starting T and it’s made me feel sort of alone because it’s a choice that I’ll have to defend myself. Idk, this comic just reminded me that there are other people who have gotten through these situations just fine and it was cool to see. I’m sorry for the long ramblings, I had a point initially but I kind of lost track of it. I mainly just wanted to thank you for what you do, it’s really nice to know that there are people out there like you.

hey friend! its not easy being us, but im proud of you for hanging in there. I personally haven't been to Mexico since I was 9 because I fear having to present as a girl, though I feel that no one down there would ever remember who I am enough to know I was born as one. I feel you on having white trans friends. I have one who I am very close to, but its hard to relate. His parents are so accepting in ways that mine aren't, and my parents do love and accept me! But that sort of acceptance in a Mexican family isn't mainstream. I had to accept that I was disappointing and hurting my parents GREATLY by choosing myself, all while knowing they still loved me.

It's weird. Even when your parents/family do come around, it's not 100%, but it's not like they dislike you. If anything, I have such a great relationship with my mom rn. We talk for hours about things I never would have thought we could ever talk about. My dad calls me as Matt often, but he still calls me by my old nickname when he's giving me kisses on the forehead.

Choosing yourself is not something we're supposed to be doing as children of immigrants. Every choice we make has to be for the betterment of the family. You might be the only one in your corner for a while, but the fight is worth it. Build community outside of your family where your presence isn't questioned. You're going to need it. Plan for the worst, and plan for the best.

Trans latines are out there. We are here! Many of us are thriving despite the horrors haha. Hang in there friend :]

[chaifootsteps]

would you shuffle around the ranking for your worst Stolas lines after this episode? darn near every line from him this episode was infruriating, so I could probably do a top 5 just on this episode alone

unordered highlights for me:

1 'have you ever apologized' or whatever the phrasing was there

-> Stolas has absolutely no right to say that to Blitzo of all people, especially when he literally apologized after Ozzie's and tried to a second time before Stolas physically removed him from his house (and Stolas didn't deserve an apology either of those times). Stolas has never once apologized for everything he's done to Blitzo. He barely even apologized for the full moon deal.

2 'I don't look down on you! when have I ever'

-> just roll the clipshow whenever he keeps pulling that manoeuvre

3 'are you here to judge me?' / 'celebrating mutual pettiness' / roll all of Stolas' comments about the party being childish into one, honestly

-> a small one but Stolas is being hypocritical, yet again. How dare Blitzo judge Stolas when Stolas says the party is petty but goes anyway then calls him a motherfucker onstage after acting like he wanted to work things out. Stolas is so desperate to ignore he acts like an immature teenager that he acts like he only went to he party to be polite when he 100% was being petty and has been acting petty since minute one of the episode starting.

4 'So you’re used to being the one who crushes others’ feelings, hm?'

-> again Stolas of all people has no right to say this. He's never given a fig about anyone's feelings but his own, especially not Blitzo - the only thing you want to hear out of him is some gushing 'I love you' speech. Not to mention that he's framing this like it's some breakup where he wanted to be serious and Blitzo led him on and broke his heart. Uh, no. They had a transactional fucking. That Stolas initiated. The self-serving logic is of the charts on this one.

5 'I’m uncomfortable with how you’re speaking to me now.'

-> but every time Blitzo was uncomfortable his feelings didn't matter, did they? Now that Blitzo is behaving exactly how Stolas previously wanted and won't indulge Stolas' romcom romance fantasies, Stolas doesn't like it. He can't handle being reminded he made it all about sex and instead tries to front like Blitzo is disrespecting his boundaries when he never gave a crap about Blitzo's boundaries or consent before and that all this sex talk is out of left field.

6 'You speak just like that vile Striker friend of yours.'

-> self-explanatory tbh. Sure is terrible Blitzo points out the material reality of the class difference. I guess Stolas is just applying magical thinking here where if he refuses to acknowledge the class difference it magically goes away, even though the only reason Blitzo is in his life in the first place is because his father bought him a friend. Also, friend? Blitzo riskedM&M's safety by sending them to fight him to a standstill and Stolas calls him Blitzo's friend just to be a dick about it

7 'The one who tried to kill me and you couldn’t be bothered to come help me.'

-> giving this one a separate entry because seriously fuck Stolas for this one. He's an ungrateful prick who didn't even remember Blitzo sent M&M to help, risking his employees. And when he finds out Striker tried to kill him once before he doesn't care Blitzo had already saved his life once - he just hyperfocuses on the fact Blitzo didn't tell him about it (even though Blitzo didn't even know til later that Stella hired Striker and Stella screamed at the dinner table about it).

8 'It’s not an imp’s place to protect a Goetia is it?'

-> where is he even going with this? He thinks Blitzo was using his being a prince as an excuse not to help him, or something?

(Except Blitzo did help. He sent M&M.)

And if he meant this question literally and that it's just about class with Blitzo, then it's pretty rich because Stolas literally has lower class guards and imps serving him and it would be seen as entirely their place and duty to throw themselves in the line of fire to protect Stolas. He's so unaware of his own status it's laughable.

9 'How I’ve tried so fucking hard to spend time with you, to support you? You don’t owe me those things, but you can’t just ignore all that!'

-> 'support' here meaning extort sex out of someone in exchange for keeping their business going (and make sexual comments when he was on the verge of a panic attack)

spend time with = send vague noncomittal texts instead of saying directly what he wants, presumably?

10 'Look how I acted this morning' / 'This morning?'

Stolas implies Blitzo needs to apologize for more than just that morning. Self victimization again, ignoring Blitzo is just responding to his crap half the time

Don't have to, you took the words right out of my mouth.

Every single goddamn line he has in this episode is unspeakably vile.

[acasualcrossfade]

Sink or Swim

Here's my fic for the Steddie Summer Exchange! :D

☀️ @steddiesummerexchange for @writer-in-theory ☀️

Stranger Things | Steddie | Rating: E | Words: 14976

Established Steddie, Scoops Ahoy! Eddie Munson, Lifeguard! Steve, Platonic Stobin, Eddie Munson and the Party

Chapters: 2/2

Read on Ao3

Notes: Thank you to the wonderful @sidekick-hero for your beta work on this! ❤️

Summary: After defeating Vecna, everyone begins to solidify their summer plans. There’s college plans for Nancy and Jonathan, and Robin gets promoted to Store Manager at Family Video. Steve remains wary about their defeat against Vecna, which stunts his own summer plans and future. When he’s urged to apply for the open lifeguarding position, his life and relationship with Eddie fall into place in ways he didn’t imagine.

☀️ Sneak peek below! ☀️

When Steve entered his house after his shift at Family Video with Robin, he noticed the pile of shoes at the door first. Steve slipped off his sneakers and tossed them to the growing pile as Robin’s shoe thunked into the pile. Her purple chucks landed next to Max’s red pair, and Steve placed his sneakers near Dustin’s sandals. His gaze shifted to the black boots in the corner. Eddie was home.

“We made it through another shift, dingus,” she smiled. She still had on her Family Video vest and the new MANAGER pin shone in the evening light. “And I almost forgot it’s Hellfire: P.E. night.” She leaned against the wall to tug off her sneakers. Hellfire: Party Edition was a special campaign between Eddie and the kids and it was the only campaign they ran as one of the Party members as DM. 

“Congrats to us. It feels like time stands still when I’m there,” Steve said dryly. He wondered if she felt as drained as he did. Family Video was the one functional hang-out spot in town, and with its influx of business and need for organization, Keith hired a freckle-face kid who was better at shelving than Steve was. 

In what felt like punishment, Keith banished Steve to the back room to sort old rewinds. Steve was pretty sure they were Keith’s movie collection that he wanted labeled and put in alphabetical order. 

“You could check with Hopper again,” Robin reminded him. “He’s probably got a list of other available jobs. Or knows someone who’s looking for an extra set of hands.”

“I know, I just…I feel like I should find one on my own.” 

Steve trusted Hopper, it still felt odd asking for something he already had. 

Besides, he did inquire about open jobs around town a few weeks ago, and Hopper referred him to the pool to be a lifeguard. The pool was far from his first choice, but the one thing about it was it wasn’t the dusty back room of Family Video. Sitting in the sun sounded better than becoming besties with the dust bunnies. Still, apprehension filled his chest at the thought of being shirtless in front of the people of Hawkins. His back and side were healed from the bat bites, but he was left with scars scattered across his torso, the worst of them at his sides. Most days Steve barely wanted to look at himself in the mirror. 

Keep reading on Ao3!

[tellmegoodbye]

Hello again everyone! We are in week SIX of music monday and I am so happy with how it has turned out so far. If you haven't taken a look at the playlists recently, I've linked them again below. Go check out the newest additions!

Tarlos | 911 Lone Star

Gone or Staying - Sleep Theory

You hide it well, but I can tell by the look in your eyes You were falling to pieces And with a glance, you let me dance with your greatest disguise And it's leaving me sleepless

If stars aligned we would be fine, but that's only in time And the clock is against me It's by design, it's all a sign in and out of your mind And I can't keep from thinking I stand here just to fight for nothing So far gone and you keep running

I know I shouldn't call you, but it's raining And you keep saying that you're all alone But I ain't with these games you keep on playing You gone or staying? Make up your mind or let me go

Another breakup era song. The line "you let me dance with your greatest disguise" makes me think about Carlos' monologue in Push, and how he said he should have believed TK when he showed him who he was. It's such a gut-wrenching line and a heartbreaking speech in general.

Nightlight - O.A.R

I swear I'm gonna keep you safe Tomorrow isn't yesterday I'll stay with you, stay with you, baby

I'm gonna be your nightlight So you can sleep tonight You're safe with me When the shadows dance outside your door I will never let you go

This song is so Tarlos. It specifically reminds me of 4x16 and the soulmates scene, where Carlos assures TK that no matter what life throws at them, he's going to stay by his side.

Stay - The People's Thieves

I pray the day will come when you can feel the sun And wipe off all the marks of days spent in the dark love

I'm slowly sinking through the ground below So hold me just long enough to Show me how to find my way back home

When you feel afraid Where you are is where I'll always go

This song is about being there for each other through the dark times. Tarlos have been there for each other through some of the worst moments in their lives, but they'll always be able to come home to each other and have a place to fall.

Tags!

@strandnreyes @goodways @lemonlyman-dotcom @bonheur-cafe @herefortarlos

@nancys-braids @captain-gillian @pelorsdyke @heartstringsduet @literateowl

@goldenskykaysani @reeeallygood @fandomswonderland @messymindofmine @toomanycupsoftea

@ironheartwriter @firstprince-history-huh @sapphic--kiwi @emsprovisions @theghostofashton

@kiwichaeng @alltheprettyplaces @paperstorm @guardian-angle22 @eclectic-sassycoweyes

[thlayli-ra]

The Chain

Characters - Drew McIntyre, CM Punk, AJ Lee (mentioned)

Pairing - Drew McIntyre/CM Punk, CM Punk/AJ Lee

AU - Soulmates AU

Rating - Mature, 18+ only

Warnings - Physical assault, blood and gore, wound-fucking (mentioned), this is NOT a love story!

Words - ~ 2000 words

Summary - After viciously attacking Punk at Smackdown, Drew steals something very personal. (Written from Drew's POV.)

I'm just a girl. Looking at a boy. Stealing a bracelet from another boy and wondering... how can I make this so much worse?

I never understand when people talk about these little red strings of fate. Where I'm from, we are connected by chains. Linked to our bodies by a sharp hook embedded in our chest, directly into our hearts. Does it hurt? Oh aye, it hurts. But doesn't it always hurt? Love, I mean? Maybe we're just raised to believe that...

The hook appears first. You don't even need to actually be with the person in question, but as soon as a soulmate connection is made, the hook starts to form. And the pain begins. It's the worst part of the whole process.

But then, the chain starts fading into existence, softly as first, like a haar, getting clearer and heavier until - if you're lucky enough to find the perfect partner - it snaps into being. Then you're hit with this... I don't know how to describe it... this shockwave of euphoria. And it's all worth it. The pain, the hurt. You don't even notice it anymore once your chain has formed.

One soulmate? Are ye daft? No, you don't just get one soulmate per person. This is the real world ye numpty! I've had two chains in my life. Some chains form then fade again, others start off faint and snaps once they've worked at their relationship. For some folk, no chain forms at all - other's don't even get the hook! - then you know you're completely wrong for each other. But then... I've seen couples who were full-on toxic and they've got a perfectly formed chain between them so who am I to judge?

And as I'm standing here, the echo of a steel door colliding with a man's face reverberating around my skull, I'm reminded of the very few who snap right from the very beginning. Punk's was like that. I can see it now, his chain snaking around my feet as he lies there, coughing up his own blood.

I've known Punk a long time so I can still remember it happening. When him and AJ began making out sloppy style in front of the cameras and the two of them parted with a wince to find the hooks digging their way into their hearts. The chain was already manifesting then too.

Must have spooked them because their instant reaction was to run in the opposite direction, straight into another's arms. But it's always the same with these things; once you've seen that chain, you start to wonder. From what I heard, the very instant they decided to give it a go between them, the chain snapped with a blinding light. It's been the same ever since, even through some very trying times for them both.

I hate that fucking chain. Just another reminder of something he doesn't deserve. Isn't it enough that's he's held all the gold, all the prestige, all the accolades and respect and devotion of his mindless fans when he's nothing but a cancer in every locker-room he's ever been in. How could he possibly deserve the girl too? And the dog?

And the chain?

He doesn't!

If I could, I would smash that chain to pieces but I can't. It's sitting right there by my toe at this very moment, but if I move my boot, it just ghosts through it like an illusion. I can grab my own chain, but nobody else's.

The hook, however...

The doors begin to open and I'm reminded of why I came. Grabbing Punk, I haul him over my shoulders and march my way into the bowels of the arena, heading straight for gorilla.

This is Chicago. Punk's home crowd. They love him here, always have and always will. No matter how much of a prick he is or how many sins he commits against others.

Like me!

Less than a week ago, I was in front of my home crowd. Unlike Punk, I had to fight to get a PLE in my home, to bring the WWE to Scotland. It took years but I finally got through to the higher-ups and convinced them that my bonnie wee country was ripe for a major event and that the crowd would raise the roof. I was proven right! They welcomed us with open arms and brought the energy, flooding the OVO Hydro with ear-splitting noise.

Was there any doubt? After all - no Scotland, no party!

But for me personally, it was a once in a lifetime opportunity. After all those years of being snubbed, of being overlooked, called a Chosen One by the boss then getting fired and dumped on my arse like yesterday's rubbish, I was finally going to get my time in the spotlight. I was the main-event, competing for the World Heavyweight Title and I was going to win it. How could I not with my people cheering me on, their support the wind in my sails, spurring me to greatness.

But Punk stole that all away from me! Why? How was it fair? I could have gone down in history, inspired a whole new generation of Scottish wrestlers! We're only a country of around five million - Chicago itself has half of that alone! Didn't we deserve our share of the glory? Weren't we allowed to believe for a single bloody night that we could be more?

But no! He left me lying on my back in my home town, clutching my bawsack where his stupid over-priced trainer had struck me. A cheap shot, like the cheap-arse bastard he is!

I'm here to repay the favour. Finally punching my way through the curtain, I stand at the top of the ramp, the jeers ringing out all around me, feeding me. I let them get a good eyeful of their so-called 'hero' slung across my shoulder like a stag I shot in the woods. Then I throw him to the ground. He lands with a satisfying crunch, a tangle of noodle limbs and blood splatters.

The noise increases. I lap it all up like a sponge. Punk's been lucky enough to triumph in front of these people. The roar they made when he faced Cena at Money in the Bank was deafening, became something of legend in its own right. He won it for them, then tore off through the crowd with his stolen prize and they loved him for it. Guy isn't even from Chicago! He's from fucking Lockport!

(But then, I guess the same could be said for me and Glasgow. I'm from Ayr, thirty odd miles away but I started out there, lived there, worked there, made my reputation there and rebuilt it there when everything seemed lost. My heart belongs to Glasgow. Guess Punk feels the same about Chicago.)

But it's not the only thing his heart belongs to, is it?

I crouch down. Punk is still reeling from the head blows and barely registers me looming in so close. I can hear his raspy breaths, see his chest quivering up and down. I then spy his hook half-embedded, off-centre to the left.

It's considered the height of moral corruption to touch another person's hook. Degenerate, perverted, an abomination. Like cooking a meal for a guest with your own shit. Yet, as my hand draws near to it, my fingers trembling, I feel a spark of electricity dancing through my nervous system. A frenzied anticipation that I can't quash. It screams through my veins as my fist wraps around the hook, feeling the weighty bulk of it on my palm.

Then I yank on it.

Punk's whole body jerks and his eyes leap open but it's too late. There's nothing he can do as I pull on his hook like King Arthur with his sword trapped in stone. It's stuck deep! I am no weakling by any stretch of the imagination but it still takes me all of my strength over several attempts to finally wrench it free.

It slurps loose with a wet squelch. Punk tries to scream but his voice is trapped in his throat beneath a fresh pouring of blood. His blood smears my hands too, falling freely from the grisly hook as I stand again, taking it with me. I admire it. It's not large, slightly bigger than my palm, and is marred with wear and tear, much like its owner.

However, up close, it shines. I had never noticed it before. How, when the light hits, it glints a golden hue that sparkles. It's dazzling. I suddenly feel the burden of having something I shouldn't in my possession, like a British archeologist taking an Ancient Egyptian mummy from its tomb. I'm every bit as fascinated by it too, stroking my hand over it, dirtying my fingers even more with Punk's blood.

'No...' Punk feebly whines. The lady doth protest, it seems.

The outcry from the mob is thunderous but I'm already tuning it out. All I care about is the golden sickle in my hand and the chain that dangles from it, so flawless and beautiful and-

I hitch a breath! The chain! I can... feel it! Solid in my hand, like magic. I'm too shocked to wonder why but every instinct in me is shrieking to test the limits of my newfound power. I grab the chain in both of my large hands. There's a rhythmic sensation like a pulse running through it, and it's so warm. Like something small and fragile and living. A captured rabbit, trembling in my grasp before I twist its neck.

I yank hard and the chain cleaves straight in two. I hear a horror-filled cry. It was Punk! Ohh, he felt that! I enjoyed that sound! Gathering up the tattered remains of his chain, I consider breaking another piece to hear that delicious squeal again when I'm distracted by the gaping hollow in his chest. A gruesome wound, wide like an open mouth. I'm actually shocked to feel a burning desire between my legs, thoughts of sticking my dick in there and fucking that cavity raw like a pussy. Shoving my hand in to hold his heart in my palm, feel it pound with terror as I squeeze it tighter. Could even just lower my breeks and piss right in there, why not? Wee shite deserves it!

But before I can do anything, I hear an angry shout and there is Nick Aldis himself. Fucking cock-blocker that he is! I'm raging at the interruption and shove him back but he's swarmed by his lackeys and I'm forced to retreat for now.

I take one last look at Punk's mangled body. What was it you said Punk? That you would "break my heart"? Did that make you feel like a big man, eh? Some kind of Johnny Big Baws? Well once again, you proved how empty your promises are and showed everybody that your sweet sentiments are hollow.

Now you have a chest cavity to match!

I pocket my prize, the blood tainting the lining of my jeans. I tap it lovingly, enjoying the solid mass of hook and broken chain through the denim.

I'll hold onto it for now Punky. For safe-keeping. Maybe, just maybe, if I feel like it, I might try it on for size. See how it is to have a little piece of you inside of me.

For a fleeting moment, I think my own chain flickers, but I'm sure it's just a trick of the light. Hope Kaitlyn didn't notice.

They're loading Punk into a stretcher now. Strapping his stupid, bloodied face into a neck brace. He looks so small and pathetic without his chain, but that's what I want!

A boat without its anchor.

Cast adrift.

Waiting helplessly for the monster from the deep to wrap its tentacles around and swallow it whole.

[bruz3r]

also please talk about him losing jason! and getting jason back!

How do you call yourself a father without a son? 

To me, this is kind of the biggest struggle for Bruce in, let’s say the GOLDEN AGE to SILVER AGE storylines so to speak. Because there is this conflict between the editorial of wanting BRUCE to remain unburdened both romantically and narratively WHILE also being deeply aware that what sells these stories is the child fantasy. The escapism. And how are you going to do that when your hero exists in a world like Gotham? 

But for me, the way I read it, is that Bruce sense of family, in both the ltieral sense and the figurative sense was destroyed the night his parents died. His whole world became a haunted memory and an empty house overnight. And for the next decade or so since then, he becomes less “person” and more “promise.” He becomes singularly devoted to his cause ; everything, even Alfred to some extent, be damned. 

And then you jump to Dick. 

This is a boy whose grief mirrors yours but he isn’t weighed down by the same loss as yours. Dick, unlike him, has this fully realized picture of his parents. They’re not as idealized as Bruce who didn’t live the same life as you know a family with a son in a traveling circus. And his family wasn’t just two people and a home. It was the circus. A circus he could still come back to with the same people and that almost facsimile of a life before. Bruce’s was an empty manor with graveyards. 

And I think there’s even this explicit line between them that he is not here to be his Father, because he isn’t. He’s just a young man. What does he know about being a Father? And who is he to take away that memory – that role – that concept from the Father that did raise Dick?

And I think that’s something people need to really understand with Bruce. Is that the role of Mother and Father ─ that title ─ it’s not something that’s not just a word. It has weight. It has meaning. It has history. It’s ghosts that live in his head and just phantoms he can’t run away from. And it begs him to ask ─ if he was that ─ what if he’s not as good as how he remembered his Father?

He is 30. So close to being older than his Father ever was. And like a self-fulfilling sacrifice, he is not a Father. He has no son. He only has a partner that he has pushed away to build him up as a pedestal of resentment. And like the folly of any god, he has made himself maker and destroyer. 

He can’t be. He is nothing like Thomas Wayne. 

And it’s self-hate hiding as acceptance. 

Your family died in an alley. The resurrection of another is a desecration of their name. 

And if you meet a boy from the streets. And it’s all that rage, all that anger, all that anything and everything good and bad, compounded into a little boy that reminds you too much of yourself. And he knows where it will take him if he loses his way. And he knows what will happen if he doesn’t do anything. And he knows it’s the best and worst decision he’ll ever make in his life. But he takes the boy made of gotham and promise. 

He makes the best and worst decision of his life: he loves this boy. 

And again, for a moment, he thinks that the ghosts will leave him. Because there can’t be room for more, right? The world wouldn’t be that cruel. He loved this boy that thought being robin was magic. 

He promised him the world. 

And then it happens. 

The murder of a boy that isn’t your son. The murder of a child who just wanted to save his mother. The murder of a hero you would never see grow up. And this time it’s worse. The ghost is a boy that was your whole world. And all the horrors and all the magic in the world could not stop it, could not take it away from you, could not bring him back in your stead. It only knows how to place the grief in your bleeding and bruised hands ; feel it beating where his heart must have been and hope and pray to whatever god would listen to make it go away. 

But you’ve been here before. 

The grief has never left. It lives in you like a promise. Never again. No more. And it becomes a loaded gun in your hand. Never means never. No more is no more. And if blood is for blood, then so be it. 

But there’s still the boy from the circus. You’re still a Father where it counts. You are still that boy’s whole world. And the darkness lives in you forever but the sun does come out. You still have a son. You still have your whole sky but you take the ghost with you. You never let him go.  You make him into a statue. You make him into a scar. You make him the promise you kept right over your chest, dictating every breath of oxygen. And you survive. 

You live. 

And the statute becomes a shadow that hangs over your head. A nightmare that you punch into every broken jaw and broken teeth of strangers that had put him in that place out of your reach. You stare them down. You build up a new myth. Never again means something close to death but not quite. And sometimes its his eyes that stare up at you. It’s his weight that you carry in your arms when there’s nothing there. 

And it’s always followed by this silence. 

Until finally a new bird comes along. 

And the shadow becomes a noose. A reminder. A threat. One wrong move and never becomes again and again and again. 

And it haunts every waking decision. 

Every moment. 

And the world just keeps moving on. Along and along. With new birds and new hopes and new dreams. And some nights the noose is loose. It hangs around your shoulder instead of your neck. But most nights it’s every hitched breath. Its that hiss between your teeth. It’s the growl that rumbles in your chest. It’s living knowing how it feels to carry the weight of a lifeless child in your arms. 

So when it happens ─ you hear his voice again. 

It’s older. It’s grittier. It’s angrier than he remembers. And you recognize it in some deep intrinsic level where logic dictates it can’t be true, you have to fight every single cell in your body that tells you its him. Because it can’t. You buried the body. You listened for the heart beat. You have his ghostly hands wrapped around your throat. You can’t let him live. 

But he does. He’s alive. It’s your boy. 

It’s your son. 

It’s your son and you're not his Father. Because you failed him where it counts. It’s your son and you’re not his Father because he lives and you want him dead. It’s your son and you’re not his father and the man that put him six feet under is nowhere near the ground. 

How do you call yourself his Father then? How do you dare call him son? 

But he is and he isn’t. 

You’re a father. And you’re not a thing. Just a failure in lieu of the name. You’re nothing like your own. 

But here is your boy ─ how could anyone ─ anyone think you don’t want him home? 

[kinardsevan]

Ok so for Gerrard’s arc, I have a new idea 😂

So god willing, Brian Thompson will only be in 3 episodes (nothing on him, just his character 😂) and not half the season. So here’s what I want:

Character focused episodes for his arc. I feel like we should start with Eddie, given he was the one left most hung up in 710. We see his summer without Christopher, his struggles to deal and also going back to therapy, really getting down into the worst of what’s still affecting him about losing Shannon. I’d love to see him do a support group for widows and meet someone, even if it’s just another guy friend who can relate. This helps with his relationship with Chris, but maybe he isn’t ready to come back home right away, but that’s okay because Eddie is also finding his stride in learning how to deal with being alone.

Episode 2, I want Hen and Chim. We see Hen and Karen dealing with fighting to get Mara back, all the tangles that they go through with the adoption process, fighting to bring down Ortiz, etc. by the end of this episode, they’re starting to get things in order for Mara to come back home and it’s all looking good. (We’re also getting updates on how Eddie is doing in therapy, etc).

Episode 3 we get Buck and Bobby. We see how Gerrard’s return has affected Evan and Tommy (in good and bad ways, what anxieties it’s brought up for both of them etc), while Bobby is dealing with (literal) home issues, finding a new house in the current market, him and Athena living out of their suitcases while they shuffle between hotels and the 118 sharing their homes (Buck and Eddie esp).

On the option of doing 2 people per episode, if we get Ravi as main cast, he could be included here. We see him and Eddie struggle the most in the beginning with Gerrard because of his racism. (If we also find out Ravi is LGBTQ, this would be an added layer, as the fandom seems to have decided that).

I definitely see Hen and Chimney being the most protective, although Buck will be too, at first. He’ll be least likely to fall into Gerrard’s wrath due to being a white, straight-presenting male who’s just fallen in with the wrong people. Gerrard will think he can educate Evan out of that role. I can even see him being a bit of a shrinking violet, kinda falling into Tommy’s ways of just removing him from the situation as much as possible because he’s trying to protect both himself and Tommy. But then something happens, maybe to Eddie, and Evan feels guilty for it. He tells Tommy about it, expecting sympathy, but Tommy calls him out for doing exactly what he did when he was at the 118, and that’s what flips Buck. He shows up at work the next day and is in full support of his friends again, but this is what gets Gerrard to turn on him, thinking the pretty cis-boy was on his side only to find out he’s not just been playing him, but he’s bisexual and sleeping with Tommy.

Shit gets bad from there. None of them have respect for Gerrard, and they want to stage a mutiny, but Bobby is there to remind them all that this is their job and the man is still in charge, regardless of how much they all hate him. Except they’ve been doing everything the right way for months. They’ve filed complaints, they’ve covered each others backs and stayed out of trouble on calls, but this man doesn’t give a fuck about them.

I really do feel like his undoing will be Buck, because he’ll see him as a turncoat. Most likely a callback to Tommy’s near death, with Eddie or Chim going in after him. Gerrard swears it’s all the kid’s fault and he had no idea that he was still in the building (they all know damn well that he did).

Bobby finally finds a house. Hen and Karen finally get told Mara can come home. Chris is talking to Eddie again. Personally, all of them are thriving. Except for the part where their boss almost got their friend killed.

They show up at Simpsons office in a united front, and tell them that if Gerrard stays, they all walk. He’s racist, homophobic, abusive, and almost got one of their friends killed just a few days ago. Simpson isn’t quite sure he wants to see them win by mutiny, and tells them that this kind of behavior won’t be tolerated.

And then Tommy and Evan walk in (they’re late coming from the hospital and for whatever reason in my head, Evan is on crutches) and tell him that they walk too. And maybe Simpson is okay with an entire firehouse kinda, but losing one of his pilots, especially one who brings him press, well that could cause a domino effect with an entire class of LAFD walking. So he gives in.

I feel like there would be some kind of caveat to this; like maybe Bobby is interim chief and they have to be overseen by someone else (maybe Simpson himself being around a little more regularly), but they get what they want, mostly bc Simpson can risk his planned bid for mayor in the spring. We end the arc with Gerrard out, our people doing better. Final scenes have Mara coming home officially, Eddie on a call with Chris about coming to visit (for thanksgiving break? Idk), maybe staying longer. Bobby and Athena get keys to a new place (maybe they’re renting?). Chimney and Maddie are ready to finally settle back into marriage by themselves after all the chaos. Life is good. And then we get our bow tied with Evan and Tommy at home (whether they still live separately or together is fine either way), Tommy massaging Evan’s bad leg, both of them glad that Gerrard is gone. Maybe this is where we get the vulnerable discussion of Evan telling Tommy he thought he might leave, because that’s what people do when he gets hurt. And Tommy tells him he’s not leaving because he loves him.

Or maybe they just have a sweet moment at home, idk lol. But this is something I could more realistically see happening with the arc (and would prefer).

[smoshingatut]

I'm kinda tired of dungeon meshi fans blatantly misinterpreting Kabru's goals, motivations, and character so they can ship him with Laios...like obviously it's awesome if you enjoy Laikabu but can you nooot twist Kabru's intentions for involving himself with the guy who constantly triggers his monster trauma and pisses him off so bad he gets brain damage so that he turns into "the guy who wants to suck Laios's dick" as his entire character? I've even seen people cut off Kabru's words to make it seem like he is admiring Laios because it would disrupt that narrative

[peapodsplace]

Hey Baba, it seems like you've been seeing a lot of yucky stuff online right now. A lot of people who aren't remembering their manners and are forgetting that there's people behind a screen. I know you like your screen time but please remember that the world isn't all like that okay? Some people are different online and forget their values and let's remember that these days, algorithms perpously show you things that'll make you upset. Yes, yes it's not very fair, is it sweetheart. Please remember to take some breaks and that the world isn't really like that. It's so important to protect yourself. Yes, silly even if you think you don't deserve it; because you do.

[sunmoontruth-stiles]

I need a completely rewritten teen wolf series with Derek Hale as the main character. I think it would heal me.

[wenellyb]

You can like or dislike fanfiction, but I don't understand people who come to Tumblr to constantly complain about fanfiction...it's like going to someone's house to call their decoration ugly.

It doesn't matter if it's true or not ...why would you do it?

And the complaints are always weird like: "blablabla why do people think in tropes now?" "Why would you want to know what happens in the story, what's even the point of reading it then?"

You want to know why??? Because that's the whole point of the Romance genre!!! The predictability, the promise that no matter what they go through, in the end, there will be a Happy Ending for the protagonists.

I don't read a lot of fanfics but I do read a lot of books and e-books (as in unfortunately I have to pay for those😂). And you know what a lot of authors use to describe their books? Tropes!

An enemies to lovers story with a slow burn, a fake relationship story, a mariage of convinience, a best friends to lovers story etc... And this is coming from published Books.

Maybe it's because the market is saturated and it's the only way to stand out, maybe it makes it easier for their readers to find specific books, I don't know. But I do know that they use tropes to describe their books.

Why sh*t on fanfiction, fanfic readers, fanfic writers when actual published authors do the same??? What is the point exactly ?

And can someone explain to me what's so wrong about using tropes? What's wrong with looking for stuff to read by searching specific tropes? It makes it easier when you're looking for a specific story you want to read and helps you know what you will like or not. Which is great, especially when you're going to pay for the book.

Maybe you don't have a problem with fanfics but with the Romance industry in general? But then why target fanfics as if they were the problem?

[feluka]

[Autistic] I actually appreciate it when people let me know that someone is deliberately being malicious rather than ignorant or confused.

[good-beanswrites]

hi! may i request some mikoto + amane (platonic obvs) … anything? they are very dear to me 😭

Yes!!! Thank you so much for the request -- they really are such a good pair ;-; (The thing is, I had so many nice scenes in mind about how they parallel each other, but they wouldn't know or reveal that about each other so I kept restarting...) Anyway, here's something right after Mikoto's first trial/verdict!

Mikoto could pick up on someone’s bad mood from a mile away, though the skill was unnecessary when the other party very clearly and calmly informed him, “I’m in a bad mood.”

After refusing his offer, Amane turned back to a thick textbook she’d been taking notes on. Didn’t kids usually complain that school was already a prison? She must have wanted the full experience. He'd worked nonstop at his studies as well, but this was a new level. Amane often reminded him of his little sister, though she always took the extra step like this. His sister would have jumped at this opportunity to play a few rounds of their favorite card game.

“It’ll be fun!”

He flashed a smile, but it had no effect on her severe expression. “I know you’re just trying to comfort me about our verdicts. I refuse to be pitied.”

“Comfort and pity are two very different things. But anyway, it wasn’t either of those things.” He gave an easy shrug “To be honest, I’m just a little bored. It’s weird not having any work to do during the day.” 

Mikoto couldn’t remember the last time in his life he’d had so many hours to himself. A lot of the others were fun to play games with. A few of the sportier prisoners helped him stay active. He enjoyed smoking breaks with the other men. Still, he was left to his own devices for the majority of his time. It was maddening. He’d recently requested some more art supplies, having used up the last batch, but they had yet to come in. Now with the verdict announcement, he wasn’t sure they’d ever arrive.

“That is your own problem. I already have something to do.” Her eyes lingered on the cards for the briefest of moments before returning to the book. “I told you, I’m not in the mood for it.”

Regardless of her hostility, he took a seat beside her. He leaned his arms out on the table. “We don’t have to play the same game.” The last time they'd played as a big group, several prisoners pulling the tables together to fit everyone. Amane had kept very quiet, eyes darting around at the cards as she tried to keep up with the rules. Not many of the others noticed the frustration clear in her face. Mikoto wasn’t the type to let her win out of pity, though he had begun to mutter the rules and strategies to himself a bit more as the night went on… 

“Is there a game you liked to play at home?”

 “No. There was no time for games in the house.” 

“All work and no play… hah… I know what that’s like.” He slumped his cheek onto his arm, lazily shuffling the cards around. He felt bad for bothering the girl if she truly was upset. He thought it was the bad experience that made her reject him, he hadn’t realized there were also family issues attached. Usually he could read people well; maybe he was losing his touch. He seemed to be losing touch with a lot of things, these days.

He readied a game of solitaire. 

“Mikoto?” Amane kept her face turned away. “There was… one game.”

“Yeah?” Mikoto shuffled the cards back together. He slid them over to her. “You should teach me!” 

She didn’t touch them. “You probably already know it.”

“Nah, I only know a few games. I’m better with tarot cards, though those aren’t really the gaming type. Come on, what is it?”

She told him the name of the game, insisting it wouldn’t be worth playing. She kept her attention on the textbook, but her eyes weren’t reading any of it. 

“Ahh, I’ve heard of that one! We start with four cards, right?” He started dealing them out.

“No, five –” she pointed to the deck, urging him to add two more. 

“Right, right.” He laughed lightly. “And the goal is to get pairs, and put them in a pile, uhh, here.”

Amane shook her head. She shifted her body slightly towards him. “You must be thinking of a different game. There’s actually three piles for pairs. One here, one here, and when it’s your opponent’s turn…” 

Her eyes gleamed as she explained the rules. She pointed to various cards, telling him exact moves and point values. “And to win, you need to –” Her expression shifted. “You… you already knew all this.”

“Of course not!” He put on his most convincing smile. 

She deflated. “You’re not a very good liar.”

“Tch, tell that to the warden.”

His shoulders sagged along with her. If Amane could see right through him, why was the rest of Milgram still coming up with stories about what he did and didn’t do? “Well, I might already know the rules, but it’s been a long time since I’ve played. You can still give me a hand. Plus, if you really are in such a bad mood, it’ll be good to take a break from your studies. You should always take a break when things get too overwhelming, yeah?”

She gave him a withering stare.

“Eh? What’s that face for?”

“Alright, let’s play. You can go first.”

“I mean it, what was that look? Aw, come on…”