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jimblejamblewritings · 2 years ago

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Your Moniker Should Be Cruel | part 1.

Summary: How do you win a war between the Greens and the Blacks? Take what you want.

Warnings: 18+ THIS IS A DARK FIC. (Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, for those who use this term) Non-con and violence and death. Do not read if that makes you uncomfortable (and do not hate on my readers that enjoy this escapism)

Pairing: dark!Aegon x reader, technically Cregan x reader (his romance doesn't really get focused on for any of the story)

Word Count: 2.4k

Series Masterlist

Despite your protests, you and your siblings had to go to King’s Landing. Especially you. After Jace was born with dark hair, your mother and father realized that they had to try until they had a child. It worked.

After you were born, no one questioned the legitimacy of your brothers. Not out loud. You were obviously Laenor’s child so why wouldn’t the others be if you weren’t even firstborn? Rhaenyra and Laenor couldn’t possibly have a bastard first and trueborn second yet still name the firstborn heir.

You never minded being the political chess piece for your siblings and parents. Your mother and father had always been honest with you. They felt they owed you that much. It truly didn’t bother you. Plus, your parents always showered you with extra love. So did Ser Harwin when he was still alive. Having three parents and three brothers was more than a girl could ask for.

You were also the only one who knew the truth about Laenor’s death. Daemon and Rhaenyra knew it would be cruel of them to let you think he was actually dead. You were happy for your father that he could live the way he truly wanted.

About once a month you received letters from Laenor. They were never signed with his name. They were always signed with the moniker of your grandfather — The Sea Snake. Every letter started the same: Let me tell you a story. Of course they were never stories but Laenor’s real life.

You watched your raven with the latest letter about how you didn’t want to go to King’s Landing fly off before joining the rest of your family. As the only legitimate child, you had to go with them. Maybe just seeing you would remind Ser Vaemond about the notion of family. Luke was your brother and the heir to Driftmark. You didn’t see why your uncle was being so vindictive about it. And you didn’t see why you had to go on ship instead of dragon. You suspected it was because your mother knew you would take the first opportunity you could get to leave. Jace approached you as the ship started to dock.

“What is wrong, dear sister? We are coming home,” he said as he leaned his arms on the railing.

You rolled your eyes. “This is your home, Mister Heir to the Throne.”

Jace laughed as he swung his arm over your shoulder. “Do you think I’d kick you out when I take the throne?”

“I wish you would. If I had to be anywhere but Dragonstone then I’d rather be with Lord Stark.”

“Ah, yes, your betrothed. You know, I remember Lord Stark agreeing to visit so much it would be like the two of you lived in both King’s Landing and Winterfell.”

“Well it’ll be different when we do that. Mother will be wearing the crown… and we won’t be living with Aegon.”

Your brother’s face was no longer light and cheerful. He grabbed your arm. “If he even looks at you, please let me know.”

“I will, Jacaerys, I promise.”

If there was one thing your brother hated, it was Aegon near you. Ever since you said that your uncle made you uncomfortable — only choosing to confide that in your brother — Jace would never leave you alone with him. There was something about the way Aegon looked at you that bothered you. It wasn’t one of lust. That was something you could deal with. No, Aegon — and to a lesser extent Aemond — looked at you like a target. Like they could get to your mother through you.

You supposed they could. You were the only daughter she gave birth to. She loved Baela and Rhaena to death but there was something different when it came to actually giving birth. And Aegon knew that.

The only time you couldn’t avoid your uncle was at the dinner your grandsire wanted. You tried to ignore all of Aegon’s crude marks that he muttered under his breath. It made your skin crawl. He smiled every time he saw he was getting to your brother. Jace finally had enough, hand slamming on the table. He held up his cup, everyone doing the same. The others smiled as he made a nice speech. He looked at you.

“And to my sister whose betrothal to Lord Stark is sure to be a successful union. He is not a man who is friends to those that disrespect his woman. Not that she needs the help, let all remember that.”

Next to you, Aegon humphed but made no other comments. Dinner went without many more problems… As long as you ignored your brothers getting into a fight with your uncles. You took a quick stroll in the Godswood to collect some flowers for your room. You also wanted the seeds to try and grow them on Dragonstone.

Years ago, you had planted the purple and blue petaled flowers. They bloomed each year and grew beautifully. Carefully, you picked the flowers without disturbing their neighbors. You checked over everything before leaving the Godswood to return to your chamber.

A gasp escaped your mouth when you ran into Aegon. The only thought that could go through your mind was wondering if he was following you. You tried to sidestep him but he just blocked you instead. You looked down when he put a hand on your waist.

“You are betrothed to Cregan Stark?”

“Yes, Uncle. I would like to get to my chamber if you do not mind.”

Aegon didn’t move. He laughed as you took a step back when he got closer. The stare was back. You looked around. If he just pushed you the wrong way, he could slam your head against the stone wall. Surely he wouldn’t do anything in a corridor that was so public, would he? Aegon took a flower from your hand. He grinded the petals into shreds between his fingers.

“It’s a shame he gets to make you his whore.”

Your eyes narrowed. Not caring about whether or not he followed you, you shoulder checked him and walked to your room. Daemon came down the hall, not hearing any of the conversation but seeing you and Aegon. He stopped you with a questioning look on his face. Despite not being your real father and Laenor still being very much alive, Daemon felt like a father. He cared about all his children whether they were his or not and would kill anyone for them. He held your face.

“Has he offended you?”

You shook your head as best as you could with him still holding it. “He is simply being Aegon. He also destroyed my flowers.”

Daemon tried not to laugh as he looked at the sad excuse for a bouquet still in your hands. He took your word when you said you were okay and continued on to his chambers. You were so happy to leave King’s Landing and return to Dragonstone. More importantly, Cregan would be coming in a month or two for a visit. He wasn’t your first choice for marriage but a princess didn’t have many choices in the world.

Honestly, he wasn’t even on your list for a man. At least he was a nice man, a good one. And he wasn’t terribly older than Jace which meant he wasn’t obnoxiously older than you. He had grown to be a friend to you and your brothers. And he understood that you weren’t just a thing for him to marry and get kids from. He had no qualms about coming down south frequently to visit your family. It probably helped that dragon transport was no more than a three day trip on a bad day.

Your happiness was cut very short with the threat of war. Your mother delivering a stillborn, your grandsire dying, your uncle stealing the throne. It was all too much to happen at once. Everyone agreed with your mother’s decision for war. You all gathered at the war table and listened to her, Lord Corlys, and Daemon. As they talked, you thought. Maybe you could write to your father. Laenor might have been able to help. That thought was quickly dismissed. If anyone recognized him then your younger siblings from Daemon would be illegitimate.

The part everyone was arguing about was allies. Lord Corlys could aid in a siege by controlling Blackwater Bay with his ships but if the Greens had land allies then they might be able to wait it out. Everyone looked at you when you picked up pieces on the table and moved them without a second thought. You and Jace were like twins more than siblings. He spoke as you moved.

“Send us. Dragons are faster than ravens. And they’re more convincing… Send us.”

Baela, Rhaena, and Lucerys nodded. You finally moved the last piece to where you wanted.

“Lord Baratheon will need force or incentive to remember his allegiance and vows. You don’t need the Eyrie to win and you might not get it because they still hate Father no matter how much they admire Mother. Not to offend, Daemon.”

“Offense not taken,” he said as he moved past you to get a better look at how you rearranged the table.

“What we need is something reassured.”

“What are you saying?” Lord Corlys asked.

“We aren’t married but Lord Stark is a loyal man and his people are loyal to him. Whether it is acknowledged or not, the Starks are Kings in the North. Lord Stark is already their King and I am to be their queen. Winterfell banners always ride for family. All of their banners. Every soldier and farmer and blacksmith.”

“He would do that before a wedding? Before children that tie his family to ours?”

You cleared your throat. Your mother, grandsire, grandmother, father, and older brother all looked at you. You supposed that you should have expected that when you opened your mouth to so willingly offer up the North. Scratching the back of your head, you focused on the table instead of everyone else.

“Creg knew o—”

“He has a nickname?” Jace asked.

“Yes, as I was saying, Creg knew our ceremony was going to be in King’s Landing and in the style of Old Valyria. We discussed it through letters. When I left Driftmark last time, I left earlier than planned. I stopped in the North before coming back home. We got married in the Godswood. Unofficially! There was no Septon and no bedding. It just made him feel better to honor his House. It wasn’t real but in his eyes we are married.”

It was settled. Jace would go to Winterfell alone instead of you as a formality since Cregan was a confirmed ally. You were going with Lucerys because you were the best speaker out of all your siblings and Lord Baratheon would be a hard man to bargain with. Despite being his daughters, Baela and Rhaena were the best choice for the Eyrie. Daemon did still inherit the Vale after marrying Lady Rhea with no kids. There was always a possibility they would be accepted.

Jace left first, needing all the time to make it to Winterfell. You all wanted to deliver the messages at the same time so you could potentially come back to Dragonstone already with armies. He landed his dragon in the open courtyard, everyone getting out of the way of Vermax’s feet. The good news about dragons was that he never had to request meeting with someone. The guards had gotten Cregan just as Jacaerys fed Vermax and told him to not steal anyone’s sheep as he waited.

Cregan’s face dropped a bit as he came outside. “When they said there was a dragon I thought it was Sunchaser.”

“I am sorry to disappoint, Lord Stark, that my face isn’t as pretty as my sister’s,” Jace said with a laugh. “I actually come with a message from the Queen.”

“What does Her Grace need? Never mind, come inside and we can eat.”

While Jace spoke with Cregan, you got on your dragon to go with Luke. Neither of you expected the Greens to already be there, let alone Aemond. Vhagar’s looming presence was terrifying even if she wasn’t doing anything. It was more terrifying as you left Lord Baratheon with a failed message. Both you and Lucerys were betrothed and had nothing to offer him. He didn’t want your youngest brothers, deeming them too young for his daughters who didn’t want to wait forever.

Before Aemond could get his wish of fighting Luke, you two were escorted out. You tried to shield your eyes as the rain came down harshly. It seemed like it had no chance of letting up. Both Sunchaser and Arrax were nervous to fly. You couldn’t blame but you two did have to get home.

Normally, you and Luke flew far apart from each other. It was almost a race. But with the horrible weather, the two of you stuck close. The dragons spit little balls of fire to help light their way and allow you two to see in the dark. You looked behind you when you thought you heard a low grumbling. Despite feeling a presence, nothing was there.

Luke followed your lead as you sped up anyway. Both of you screamed when Vhagar came out of nowhere. The rain made it hard to see and avoid the creature. You could hear your uncle’s laughter. It was hard to tell if Aemond was taunting or actually wanted to kill you. You didn’t want to stick around to find out. Luke and you accidentally split apart when you two left the cavern that Vhagar couldn’t enter.

Sunchaser banked a hard left when he heard Arrax’s yelp. Without even needing a command from you, Sunchaser flew between Arrax and Vhagar. He blew fire into Vhagar’s face, the dragon roaring so loud you thought you would lose your hearing. You flew up into the clouds.

It was clear above the rain clouds but you couldn’t find your brother. You breathed out in relief when Arrax and Lucerys came over to you. With a nod, the two of you decided to go in the opposite direction. It was better to fly over land and lose Vhagar instead of staying over open water. You might even fly to Winterfell where you were sure to be safe.

You felt your heart stop when Vhagar appeared out of nowhere, biting Arrax into pieces. You couldn’t see Luke. Had he been eaten or was he falling? If he was falling then you could still save him. You didn’t get an answer to that question. Vhagar’s giant claws ripped out the back of your dragon as she scooped you up, still attached to your saddle.

(part 2)

PERMANENT TAGLIST:

@venomsvl @peaches-n-sunscreen @summerellaz @supernaturallover2002 @sambucky8 @9daykrisr @thebitchinleo @23victoria @scarlets-widow @pagetpagetpagetpaget @lovexnatasha @awesomebooklover17 @1234-angelika @imatrisk @blackreaderatrisk @princess-jules47 @alexloveskili @a-marie-a @siriuslysirius1107 @i-have-no-life-charlie

#house of dragon fic #hotd fanfic #hotd fic #targaryen!reader #velaryon!reader #aegon targaryen x reader #aegon ii targaryen #dark!aegon ii targaryen #dark!aegon

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miraculous-ninjabird · 1 year ago

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I as an ex-mormon have found a pretty solid strategy for the missionaries who are always coming around my house. (I never bothered with the legal process of getting my name removed). It’s so far worked pretty well and doesn’t actually involve me telling them no (since I often have an issue with that. I’m working on it).

I’ll note my strategy won’t work for everyone. I’d encourage people who encounter mormon missionaries to try it if they are able but if you can’t or won’t then the best thing you can do is just politely tell them ‘no thanks’. Please don’t antagonize them it’ll just make thing worse. But anyways. Moving on.

I’ll almost always let them in when they ask unless I’m busy or have plans. I’ll often times let them schedule another time to come by if I am busy.

My strategy is to immediately engage them and get them talking about themselves. Their interests, where they’re from, their pets back home, what they plan to study in school, places they are interested in checking out on the one day off a week they get, ect. Anything other then the reason they came (religion).

My reasoning behind it as follows. These are young men and woman ages 18-22, many of whom this is their very first time out ‘on their own’ in the real world. But they have lots of rules to follow and they are literally expected to eat, sleep and breath religion. Even on their ‘days off’ they are heavily restricted on what they are allowed to do. I want to give them a chance to be just people without all that. I want to help remind them that they individuals and that their religion does not define them.

Guys you should see how excited some of these people get when they see I genuinely I want to hear about them and their interests outside of their religion. They’ll go on and on about this or that. Their favorite books or that movie they’re really excited to see when they finally get home or the dog that they miss or how they used to love helping out on their grandfather’s goat farm or how they hope that they’ll get transferred up norther next spring because they really want to see that solar eclipse or the degree that they’re planning to peruse. Often times they get so caught up in what they are telling me that they forget the reason they even came in the first place.

It’s both very heartwarming and in a way kind of sad because I know my house is one of the few times that they can just be who they are without the religion. When they are with me I actively encourage them to talk about and think about things that are important to them but that they simply don’t get the chance to talk about or hardly even think about while they are on their missions.

Often times I’ll get the same pairs coming back and a good 8/10 they forget the religion entirely and just get to be themselves. Sometimes I’ll make dinner for them. I’ll invite them to play board games (this invitation can be hit and miss). Overall we all have a pretty enjoyable time with the trade off is the 2/10 times they remember I have to sit through a prayer or a 5 minute lesson or an invitation to come on Sunday. But I personally don’t mind that. I spent a lot of time feeling oppressively surrounded by their belief system when I was just as an everyday member so I can’t imagine how bad it must get sometimes to have that be your only thought every moment of the day. If I can provide a space to help relieve that pressure on these missionaries then I’m more than happy to sacrifice here or there.

And you know. I’m queer and while I don’t flaunt it I’m not shy about it in my own home. Anyone who visits will immediately know. Most missionaries won’t ask or even bring it but but the results in regards to the ones that do have actually been resoundingly positive. They’ve been polite and willing to engage in an honest discussion with me about their beliefs in that front and why I take issue with it. I’ve had times where having these people over, engaging them on a personal level, and showing them that ‘hey I am a normal person just like you’ has actually made a legitimate difference. I’ve gotten missionaries to question the very bigoted beliefs held by many members of their church. I’ve had missionaries say ‘you know that’s a good point. I don’t know why that is, I’ll have to look into it.’

Even if that doesn’t happen I’ve never had things go badly. I’ve never been insulted or called slurs. I the worst I’ve gotten is them explaining their beliefs say my ‘lifestyle’ is wrong and then asking if they’re still anything they can do to convince me to change it. It’s always dropped when I say no. And while this is obviously not a good thing to say to a bi/enby person like me, I’m also fairly forgiving on that front. This is because I myself have had to go through the process of unlearning those bigoted beliefs. Unlearning and then Restructuring your entire worldview is a long, difficult, and confusing process and I personally am willing to give people the benefit of the doubt to allow them a chance to start that process. <- I will note that the missionaries that I have to politely but firmly shut down on this front often don’t come back but that’s fine since I’m not at all interested in what their religion has to say on the matter.

My hope here is that by being kind and welcoming and giving these people a safe place to see that ‘hey the outside world really isn’t as terrifying as the church tells you it is and that we are all just people trying to live our lives’ that maybe I’ll make a difference and encourage someone to reconsider their beliefs or give someone who doesn’t want to leave but feels trapped the courage to do so. I honestly couldn’t tell you if it makes a difference in their lives afterwards in regards to the church but I do know I’m making a big difference in their lives in that moment and for me that’s enough.

Plus there’s also the bonus of I don’t mind entertaining them for a few hours here or there and every hour they spend with me is one less hour they spend in the house of someone who really doesn’t want them there but was to nice to say no. So yea.

This was prompted by the fact that I had missionaries over at my house this morning and we had a lengthy and interesting discussion about space and exactly zero discussion about religion.

#tw religion #ex mormon #thoughts on missionaries and religion #I will say I belive religion can be a very good thing for many people #and that religious freedom is crucial.#but mormanism is a cult who promote beliefs that are dangerous and harmful #there’s no if ands or buts about it #as a former morman I feel like I need to help #but I’m limited in my options so this is how I can #be nice to the missionaries and maybe help them see that their belief is not everything #I get not everyone has that in them #but I will at the very least emplore people not to be outwardly cruel or mean to them #I see that happens a lot but all that does is reinforce their beliefs #so yeah #if you can’t or don’t want to help provide a safe space for them #just tell them no and go about your day #they’re used to people closing doors in their face so it’s better than antagonizing them

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yackers · 2 years ago

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my hoa family hcs:

(these are soo set in stone to me so if you disagree idc) (also all of these don’t actively go against canon im pretty sure most of it is actually based on it)

fabian: my personal hc for him is that it was him his mum and his 3 older sisters (most likely adult) , his dad died when he was pretty young (or left or was never in his life) but jasper and uncle ade have always filled that role for him. his whole family is into antiques history and archaeology and his mum is an archaeologist. idk he just doesn’t have only child vibes he very much has spent his whole life around women vibes. his family lives nearby the school and he only goes there because they travel too much to be with him full time, which is why his family antique shop is close enough to visit in a lunch break.

nina: her gran is her only family after her parents died, since both her parents were only children. her mom was spanish and her dad was american and her gran is her dad’s mom.

mick: his parents are still together and based on how he always said that his family was moving to australia rather than his parents I'd guess he has at least one sibling, though probably just one. maybe an older brother who was in his second to last or last year at amun when mick first started.

patricia: her parents are together and sibling wise it’s always just been her and piper. her parents are distant and their attention depends mostly on academic achievement as they care more about appearances than anything else. this lead to piper trying as hard as she could to succeed in music and academia and patricia just trying to get their attention by pissing them off. they were sent to boarding school pretty much as soon as they could be, with piper going to her fancy music school and patricia just going to amun because they offered them both a scholarship. both their parents have high up jobs where the image of the perfect family is more important to them than their actual family and they travel tonnes.

eddie: he’s always known about his dad being an english boarding school teacher and then headmaster but they’ve never really been in communication much. his parents weren’t together for long, they tried to make it work for longer when his mom found out she was pregnant but ultimately neither one of them wanted to move to the other country and sweet knew what he knew about the whole osirian thing and thought it best to keep a distance. so it had always just been him and his mom living in an apartment in new jersey (was that where all u americans decided he’s from?? bc u guys know best <3) his mom has a sister she’s really close to though so he’s always has cousins around him that he get on with like siblings. his mom is really cool and he gets on with her really well. she sent him to england when he fell in with the wrong group of friends and started getting in trouble and thought that part of it was probably due to the lack of a role his dad had in his life, but she wouldn’t have sent him if he didn't have less than two years of school left bc she would’ve missed him too much.

kt: her parents passed away when she was a kid so she was raised by her young aunt and her grandfather. she lived with two of her young cousins that she helped look after and she would never have left them all if it weren't for her grandfather begging her to go to amun for her senior year

willow: she’s either an only child or one of like 7. her parents are fun hippies that sent her to boarding school because they travelled a lot and they realised that homeschooling was affecting her socially. she does miss her 7 cats though.

amber: it’s just her and her dad. her mum either passed away when she was like superrr young or left and isn't in her life. her and her dad are pretty close (she’s his pride and joy) but because of her carefree behaviour over summers he has an idea of her as a party girl that lacks focus that only really starts to bother her after the sibuna stuff. she’s a little spoilt but overall he’s a good dad that tries to spend as much time with her as he can when she’s not in school.

joy: her parents are divorced though fairly recently (before or after s1 depending on if they mention her mum in s1) and over the holidays she splits her time between the two of them. she’s an only child (bc I love her but she soooo is) and her relationship with her dad is definitely in a rough place after the whole chosen one thing but he’s really trying. her mum took the cat and she uses that as an excuse as to why she likes to stay there more (bc if her mum knew the full story, as in the one other than the one about her dad’s job, she wouldn't let her go back to the school)

alfie: im so sure he has siblings because he pranks too much to be an only child and I think jerome’s lack of surprise at his ‘little brother’ means he probably does. and like ik that it’s something that jerome and patricia were able to hide but they had their reasons to lie about it and I don't think that alfie does. so he at least has one younger brother and maybe a younger sister but i don’t think that based on the way his parents were with him that he has an older sibling because he was being compared to jerome rather than a sibling.

jerome: his dad went to prison when poppy was just a baby and his mum was always too pissed off at his dad leaving her a single parent that she kind of just resented both her kids and sent them to boarding school pretty much as soon as it was legal. he always felt pretty abandoned by everyone, especially since his mum never had a nice thing to say about his dad, so he always made an extra effort to make sure poppy never felt the same way, doing stuff like getting buses and trains to her school ceremonies and plays so she always had someone in the audience.

mara: it’s just her and her parents and she adores them and they adore her. they’re pretty famous athletes that have an almost celebrity status within the country and they work a lot, so they sent her to boarding school just for secondary school so that she could live a life out of the spotlight. they visit a lot and send her weekly care packages and despite initial disappointment that she didn't wanna follow in their footsteps they were so proud of her academic talents. she plays netball because after the way she was brought up sports just can't not be a part of her life.

#if u wanna ask me any more about these pleaseee do #also I am joking in that first sentence but equally if you're gonna rb this just to disagree and be negative please don't #but like obvs discussion is fine u get what I mean #house of anubis #hcs #hoa #txt

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izzy-b-hands · 8 months ago

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Rambling abt the half dream half nightmare that woke me up today below the cut. feel free to ignore, just need to vent it out somewhere. Probably going to include me talking abt Current Family Issues and Feelings so. yeah. TW for mentions of someone in hospital, death, religion, and overall family dysfunction lmao

I know that ultimately, right now, if something big and/or terrible happened medically to anyone in my family back in ND, I wouldn't be able to go see them. The money just isn't there (part of why I'm not going out there this summer nor are they coming out here at all.) I've accepted it, and I try not to think abt it.

That said, LOVE (read: HATE) my brain deciding a hyper realistic yet weird dream abt my mum winding up in hospital is the way to go this morning. Complete with:

-her bf refusing to speak to me abt it, and telling me not to bother going to visit her in the weird, somehow existing in both CT and ND simultaneously, hospital with a 'haven't you already been enough of a burden to her?'

-me staying in my grandparent's old house in ND, and for some reason that meant being wildly unable to get ready to go to the hospital. Finding my clothes was nearly impossible, but. all their old decorations were back up on the wall so even as I was searching for them I like. Didn't want to leave? As if the house would revert back to being sold like it has been irl, if i left it. Finally I wound up just stealing clothes from my grandfather's side of their closet (specifically his old 80s styled 'eagle on a tree branch' print sweater that he got forced to toss a few years ago bc it was becoming more holes than sweater, and one of his old, big leather jackets. somehow i found jeans that fit me, idk how considering i can't seem to do that irl rn but i digress)

-me showing up to the hospital FINALLY only for Noel Fielding?? to be sitting outside it with a friend dressed in what i can only describe as absolutely gorgeous future techno witch clothing. Unfortunately they were fucking dicks in this dream and scared the shit out of me by joking that 'it was so nice I'd shown up still despite the worst' and implying my mum had already passed. Noel did shout apologies as i stomped off inside and that as far as he knew she was still okay, but his friend is the one who handed me a wrapped in plastic, small, metal stool with a weird cartoon face on the seat so i could 'sit with her body, like sitting shiva, right?' (not like that at all to my knowledge, but then again my family has rarely to never fully followed any of the various religious rituals around death, we just. take the bits the dead person liked from them and ignore the rest, for better or for worse. Maybe that's just what happens when a family is a mishmash of various christian sorts from Catholic to Protestant with the hidden knowledge that actually, prior to ppl moving to the States, ppl in the family were Jewish but inter-marrying into Catholic families for safety-sake, and so any Jewish traditions used now are done wrongly and weirdly and in odd bits and pieces. At least that's as much as I've been told/have found out abt it, anyway)

-I proceed into this stupidly fancy and open concept hospital, to immediately find a hugr crowd mucking up the elevators (crowding the elevator bank and refusing to let others on.) That's where Con showed up, and helped me make it up the ridiculously wide, roundish staircases (think like. wide rounded stage steps, but for each level of this hospital), while also trying soothe me by telling me Housemate was already here and waiting for me, so were my grandparents and even Mum's bf (he promised to keep him away from me lol, it was v sweet in an otherwise filled with anxiety dream.)

-however, as we were struggling up the steps (also full of crowds, pushing each other around, so we literally had to hold hands and hold onto the railings and walls to avoid being shoved down the stairs), he kept hesitating on saying more abt mum. He tried to distract me by mentioning that, since I was here, the docs might want me to address some of my own health issues but that he wouldn't let them force me into any treatment i didn't want. Then he finally alluded to mum being in worse straits than I'd been told abt and said something to the effect of 'doing only what you can, not what she or others would expect of you' and 'not to set yourself on fire to keep someone else alive' plus admitting he was deeply worried my family was abt to force me into a big decision that absolutely wasn't the ONLY treatment option that would help mum, but it was implied to be the one mum's bf and my grandparents were pushing for.

-still dunno exactly what that option was, but just before i woke up i started hearing the latter part of the song Gethsemane from JCS (Housemate and I have been watching various versions irl this weekend lol), specifically the bit where Jesus dares/begs/etc God to see how he dies. This was accompanied by me finally reaching my mum's hospital room, and a stupid bright light emanating from it and like. Not to critique my own brain and the dream it created, but that was far too on the nose for me personally lmao.

-and I woke up thinking abt the call with my grandparents that I had on Thursday (didn't go super poorly but went. kind of weird and uncomfortable and confirmed again that like. they're happy for me being out here in CT, yet at the same time hold it and my happiness against me to some unconscious degree as originally outright confirmed by Mum in an earlier call her and I had like. Tail end of last year lmao. the main crux seeming to be 'why couldn't i find happiness in ND/what's wrong with all of them/why wasn't i willing to keep trying to make my life work in ND regardless of my happiness/don't i know how hard it is without my being there to help everyone whenever they ask/etc family bullshit')

And now I'm laying here thinking. If the Worst would happen for any of them, they would fully expect me to empty my bank accounts and do whatever else i had to, to get to ND not just to see them, but to help. to take care of as much as possible for them (mum and grandma get decision paralysed by sad/scary life events, my aunt is so uncomfortable with sickness and death she won't do hospital visits or funerals at all anymore for anyone, my cousins...are young enough they won't know how to handle it/won't want to, my grandpa tends to just shut down and isolate when things go to shit, and that's not to say that they all don't still get done things that need doing in these situations, but that they DO all usually need prodding and help and have leaned on me for that since i was a kid.)

And i would of course want to see them/help however i could, but. not to that extent. not to the point that I'd have nothing for myself, no money or help (bc they're not in a position to return that help or money to me, and they'd be so emotional as to likely be extremely offended and upset if i mentioned needing help myself.)

That said, I'm sick of silently daring them to watch me die just for their sakes, even tho i do still love them all dearly. and of course, that's entirely too dramatic but at the same time, Mum and I have had convos abt 'what if there's a shooting somewhere that we're at, how do we handle it, how are we attempting to protect each other' and Mum always says she would take a bullet for me, but she didn't protest when i say that I'd take one for her or anyone else in the family first. Last time she just nodded like. yeah. of course you would. so. Feelings, abt all of this.

If u actually read this full thing that was A. very sweet of u and i appreciate that u care abt my silly lil fucked up brain enough to do that (genuinely, I'm v grateful) and b. here is a pic of Nisha as what little compensation i can give for u reading this long ass ramble lol

#text post #long post #i should get up for the day bc this dream may have fucking sucked #but there are spring birdies peeping outside and Housemate and i have planned a day of just chilling together #also gonna put together the chocolate ikea easter bunny we got at some point #neither of us celebrate religiously anymore lmao but it's an excuse for egg and bunny shaped chocolates #anyway i can never tell my family any of my feelings abt this stuff or it'll be seen as an utter betrayal of them #and as a sign to them that i dont care abt or love them #but i do. i just want to have my own life and happiness just like they have theirs. and live for myself as much as i do others

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a-lilacsong · 2 years ago

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mateo and quita moz for the writing requests please :D

(This story is set after "Spirit of a Wizard” and before "The Lightning Warrior")

Mateo paced back and forth in the wooden hallway. “I shouldn't be worried about this… this is going to be fine. All I have to do is go in there, say hi, then maybe we can talk, and if he's busy I can leave. No big deal right?” He said to himself. His clenched fist lingered near the mass of roots which made up the door, hesitating. He had only ever talked to Quita Moz once when he was with Elena, and he felt like he hadn't made the best impression.

The first thing he’d asked the Oracle was “Can I call you Quita?” He shook his head as he remembered. What was he thinking!? It was one thing to be awkward around nobility or the palace staff, but it was another thing entirely to give a bad impression to an all-knowing ancient magical being who might be one of the only beings who he could really discuss Maruviain magic with! He desperately wanted to, but he was afraid that his questions would sound childish to someone so old and wise. So the only time he'd ever really met the Oracle was when Elena insisted he come along with her for her crystal tamborita lesson. (A tamborita made out of crystal! It was just as beautiful as he'd imagined. He even got to hold it at one point!)

Sure, he’d visited the other Sunbirds with Elena, and they were welcoming to him, but they weren't as interested in magic as Quita Moz (If you could even get them on this subject when talking with them). But now that he had his new tamborita from his grandfather's secret library, questions about it had been gnawing away at him and he finally mustered up enough courage to come here and try and ask those questions himself (after a little convincing from Elena, Luna, and Skylar). Maybe if they were here, they'd be able to help him, but they’d encouraged him to do it on his own. So here he was, he was going to walk through that door and say hello, no more hesitation.

Or maybe not. “No I really shouldn't bother him, he might not even be here right now…” He told himself. He turned to leave when suddenly the massive roots parted in front of him surprising him so much he fell backward onto the floor. Now that the door was open, he could see the giant Oracle inside, awake and looking down at him.

He quickly stumbled back up to his feet and tried to brush himself off while making an attempt at a wave. “Hello uh hola, hi there Quita Moz, it’s me Mateo! Hi! Sorry to make a surprise visit like this. I just…”

Quita Moz slithered towards the door “Greetings Mateo. It isn't a surprise to see that you're here.”

He looked up at him in awe, “Were you able to foresee my visit?”

“No, I did not get any visions about it, I just heard you talking to yourself in the hallway for the past 10 minutes.”

Mateo turned red “Congratulations me, you messed up your introduction yet again.” he thought. But he couldn't turn back now. “May I come in and speak with you? Por favor?”

He gestured with his wing “I don't see why not, you may come in.”

As Mateo walked through the door he looked at the roots that had been pulled away. “I'm glad to see that your door grew back after Kizin broke it. Maybe I should think about getting a door made out of living material for my wizard nook at the palace.” An anxious thought occurred to him “I'm sorry about not stopping Kizin before he got in here.” he apologized “But at least we stopped him before he released the other monsters, so all’s well that ends well right?” he awkwardly laughed and did a thumbs up.

Quita Moz's expression remained neutral “I agree. It's actually quite impressive that you were able to stop him so quickly. The last time he escaped, much more was destroyed than a door.”

“Oh well, it was mostly Naomi. She was the one who did all the stuff with the magic bag that day. Also, Elena and Gabe were there to stop him too, I was just sort of, you know, being part of the team.” He said pacing back and forth while flexing his fingers.

“You shouldn’t sell yourself short, Elena told me how important your research was in defeating him.”

He stopped pacing and made eye contact “She did?”

He nodded. “Yes, she always speaks very highly of you, you are evidently quite good at your job.”

He could feel the excitement rising in his chest. He took his tamberita out of his holster and held it so that his hands didn't just flail around with enthusiasm. So, Quita Moz didn't think he was a total joke after all! “Well, thank you. Thanks. That's good to hear!”

“You're welcome.” Then the sunbird looked puzzled and seemed to stare at him more closely. “Did you paint me on your tamborita?”

Oh no, he'd meant to ask about this more tactfully but now that the Oracle had seen it, the words just burst out of him all at once. “No, I mean, maybe? I mean, I didn't paint it! I found it in my abuelo's library, along with some old robes of his and I decided to start using it because it's so cool! And I realized it looks like you, and I didn't know that my abuelo even knew that you existed, so I didn't know if it was coincidence or if it was on purpose! And I wanted to know if you ever met my grandfather Alacazar before?”

The sunbird spread his wings and furrowed his brow “Whoa, slow down Mateo, deep breaths. You look like you're about to fall over again.”

“Right. Yes. Yep. Deep breaths.” Mateo breathed in and out for a few counts before Quita Moz continued.

“So Alacazar was the one who made it? That makes sense, he was quite the artisan when it came to crafting tamboritas, and he did quite the handsome job on this one. May I see it more closely for a minute?”

“Yes, of course!” Said Mateo, handing it to him. “So you did know him! That's so cool, but I thought that everyone assumed that the sunbirds had disappeared since before he became the royal wizard?”

Quita Moz Held the tamborita in his tail feathers like they were a hand. “We had disappeared, it was a calculated decision. There were certain things that needed to be dealt with before we made our presence known again, and you never know when it's the right time to come back after being gone for so long.” He turned the tamborita over. “Hardly anyone knew that we were back, but Alacazar was curious to a fault and eventually found us. He visited me a few times before humans were banned from visiting Vallestrella.”

“Wow, that's amazing! You must have had a lot of time to talk with him and get to know him, right?”

“Well, yes, we discussed things, monsters, magic, the future…”

“So you told him prophecies about the future? His future?” Mateo was becoming ever more excited. The whole concept of prediction magic was fascinating, and yet with all he had read up about it he felt like he had barely scratched the surface of understanding it.

“Well, the flames can be pretty finicky at times, they didn't always show things every time he came to visit.”

“Is there anything specific you can remember?”

“Hmm.” He handed back the tamborita. “Yes, this is a very good wand.” Said the Oracle, not answering his question. “I'm surprised you didn't start using it sooner.”

“I only found the library last week. Before then, I had just been sleeping on top of it without ever knowing it was there. Although it was supposed to be a secret library, so I guess that makes sense.”

“I see…so Alacazar didn't even tell his family about it?” It was hard for Mateo to read the sunbird’s expression. Was he just curious or was he concerned?

Mateo shook his head “Oh no, my mom didn't know about it, and it wasn't in any of his journals either.”

“Then it's quite lucky that you found it.”

“Well, it wasn't quite luck….” Mateo replied, hoping Quita Moz wouldn't ask him any more about it. He could barely talk about it with his own mother, let alone an ancient Oracle he just formally met.

“Either way, it does fulfill a prophecy.” Quita Moz replied.

“Wait, it does?”

“Yes, you'd asked if I'd ever told Alacazar any prophecies in regards to him. Long ago in the flames I saw a young wizard with brown curly hair, wearing red robes, casting spells in his name. Now that I recall it, yes the wizard in the vision was wearing the same robes as you are now.”

Mateo jumped up “You saw me?!”

“Well, at the time neither of us were sure who it could be. After his daughter Rafa was born, he told me it must be her and that he was planning on teaching her magic when she was old enough. He said that he planned on surprising her with robes and her own tamborita as soon as she was ready.”

“So then…He must have made these robes for her.” Mateo said. He had wondered why they fit him so well when the rest of his grandfather's robes had such wide shoulders. Some old people in town said he looked a lot like his mom, so it must be true of visions of the future as well.

“Yes, although the flames' picture was unclear. Now that you're standing here before me I see that it must have been you all along. I'm sure that he'd be glad to know you’d found them and could wear them.”

“That's just what Elena said! I mean, Elena was there, when I found the robes and the tamborita and she also thought that I should have them. I mean, otherwise they'd just be sitting there collecting dust. But now that I know this was foretold, that makes them even more special!”

“Indeed, although It is a surprise to me that he would choose to paint me on the tamborita.”

“Well, I can see why, you were friends! You're the one who told him this prophecy in the first place, and you're majestic looking so why not paint you on it to honor you?”

“Honor me?”

“Of course! You deserve to be honored as much as anyone else I know. You've always helped Elena with her scepter, you taught her spells that were essential for protecting the Kingdom, and you told her about the darkness so she can prepare for it; even if we're not sure what it is yet. You're so amazing! Ha, that's why I was so nervous to meet you and I guess I still am.” He saw the sunbird’s expression was one of apprehension. “Wait, you don't feel that way?”

He shook his head “It's apparent that Alacazar as well as yourself held me in quite high regard but I did not do much to earn it.”

“What do you mean? You've been helping us out a ton!”

“Well, I've been helping Avalor in the present, but back then it was different. Over four decades ago I had visions of some kind of danger coming to Avalor, a dark force that would be hidden from view until its time had come...but I decided not to go through the portal to warn Alacazar about it. I decided that keeping my existence a secret was more important than seeking him out, and I just assured myself that it wouldn't be a big deal. That whatever it was, the kingdom of Avalor could defeat it and I wouldn't need to worry about it. But then it turned out that the threat was Shuriki.”

Mateo stood still, taking this all in.

“I only found out what happened when I overheard a jaquin patrol talking about the devastation. Now you are the last wizard left in Avalor.” he sighed “If only you had the chance to meet him. It's funny that you were afraid to meet me, because I've always been dreading the day that you would all learn this.”

Quita Moz bowed his head, he voice going quiet: "I'm sorry for my inaction, and all the horrors that caused and I’m sorry that you were unable to meet him. You really are a lot like your grandfather, curious, kind, and eager."

After a long moment of silence, Mateo replied, barely any more than a whisper. “I did meet him, and I-I wasn't able to save him either.”

“You...did?”

“Yes I-I-I—” he stuttered as a pain he'd been trying to bury in his heart shot to the surface.

“Mateo…” Quita Moz spread out his wings towards the young wizard. With eyes full of tears, he ran over to him and accepted the hug.

~~~~~~~~~~

Three weeks later…

“Hi Quita Moz!” said Mateo as he ran through the door of the cave.

Quita Moz looked over at the young wizard, who was carrying a very large backpack and wearing an even larger smile. “Hello Mateo, did you bring those potions you wanted me to look at?”

“Yes right here!” he said, holding up a few of the shimmering bottles.

“Great, those look- wait, is that your Maruvian spellbreaker potion?”

"Yep, it's from the latest batch where I added raíz de estrella to help restore the equilibrium of a target's inner magic after the potion has broken the initial effects of the target spell. It worked well on my plant tests. But umm, what do you think?"

"Mateo, that's…really clever, I hadn't considered that before, but that plant is a natural counter to the effects of hojas azules de frambuesa, so that makes sense it would balance it out."

“That's what I thought! I mean, it just sort of came to me one day when I was helping my mom pick berries for Sunday dessert. Then when I tried it out on Monday, whoosh, instantly more effective!”

“You'll have to show me then.” Said Quita Moz.

“Of course, I brought along a whole bag's worth of things to test it on. Let me just set up.”

As he watched Mateo set up, Quita Moz smiled. The young wizards' zest for magic was contagious. A memory flashed in his mind of many many summers ago when another young man had come to show him some plants that he’d discovered in caves around the valley. He hadn't realized how much he'd missed this, knowing someone who loved magic with all their heart and wanted to share their discoveries with another.

When Mateo left hours later, as the sun began to set, Quita Moz watched him leave, thinking about the apprentices of his past who eventually he never saw again. But he was content that he would see Mateo again in two weeks' time. No disappearing, and no pacing.

#Mateo de Alva #Quita Moz #elana of avalor #eoa #This was supposed to be short and then it grew into 2500 words #ask answer #my writing #2023-02-21 #Lilac's writing requests

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emeraldbabygirl · 2 years ago

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This has been in my drafts and I am constantly thinking about this and I’m just gonna post it cause I wanna get it off my chest. Might delete later and Idk if it’s gonna like offend anyone cause can’t predict nothing no more about what people find offensive but hey if you read it you read and I cannot control the feelings of others this is just something that has been bothering me for like a few years and I just wanted to get it out and I guess since tumblr is my new diary...

I’ve been filling out white and alaskan native/American Indian on every health paper ever since I was a child, I’ve always done it my sibling and mum have always done it. I grew up believing I had Native American in me, yet I was somehow ashamed that I was native I thought I would get made fun of or that I was a joke. Now that I’m older I’m still a joke. I thought that if it was in my blood and in my ancestry then it mattered and it was better than nothing but it’s not. I’m trying so desperately to belong because I’m tired of being seen as white I got tired of the comments and feeling bad about my skin color and tired of all the things I see in the media and read about that I thought I’ll just unofficially identify as Native American and learn more about natives, as I grew up in a white family. But there’s no point. I grew up in a white family I am white, I have pale skin and blue eyes and dark blonde hair. My mum has dark skin but brown hair and blue eyes. She and my brother have thick hair, I have a great aunt with thick hair and what my mum and I call an Indian nose along with my mum, my great uncle had brown eyes and thick black hair my father’s mum thought she was Native American and had all these art pieces and statues of natives but no one on my father’s side was native. He always said he had German and Irish on his side while my mum had Indian on her’s, she just recently found out she had some Portuguese and black somewhere further down the line, her great great grandfather (idk how many greats) was born and raised on a flathead reservation, Idk which one, my mum’s great aunt tried to go to one of the tribes in Missouri but they wouldn’t let her in, my mum was told the flathead tribes were in Montana and then I find out there’s Salish tribes up in Washington. I have a friend who is Cherekee Indian and she has visited the reservations a lot, she’s got brown hair and brown eyes and darker skin than me, she has Indian pieces passed down or handed to her from her tribes, she’s met with one of the Salish tribes chief up in Washington. I have done none of that I am the stereotypical “white girl who goes to Starbucks” for years I never once thought about my skin color or my race in a bad way I just thought I was mixed with many things but the past 3-4 years I’ve been shoving this Native American blood or whatever you want to call it down my own throat because I hated my skin I hated being white I hated being called white and I wanted to belong. I wanted to be proud of myself in any way I could. I started to braid my hair more often because it made me happy, I bought a book written by a Native American, I got sweatshirts with tribe names on them I followed natives online I felt like I was in a spot where I belonged for once that I was comfortable again with who I was I was learning more about flatheads and all kinds of things I was looking at native products online and watching videos on how to do stuff like beading and making frybread, I was making frybread for the first time in my life, my mum had been wanting to make it for awhile I was doing all this stuff cause I thought it was helping and making me feel better and proud of who I am and it’s done the exact opposite. I spent 21 years of my life having never stepped foot on a reservation, having never learned how to bead or make frybread or go to a powwow, (and I’ve always always wanted to go to one), I know few things about Native Americans and their cultures compared to people who are actually Native American, compared to people who are aware of the cultures and beliefs, aware of what their people went through, their people not my people, I was calling them my people, my mum is 1/16 native yet has native features, if only it would’ve been kept in the family then maybe I’d look the part but it didn’t all my ancestors mixed and the ending result is what I’ve always been; white. I hate it. I wish I wasn’t white I wish I had a culture and a way of life I wish I had something to be proud of I wish I had people that I was around to teach me everything I wish I belonged,

I wish I knew the history and was able to see things differently. The reason I don’t always agree with things involving native Americans, like why dressing up as one for Halloween is wrong or why it’s important that the tribes get their land back is because I am not them. Other then my supposed native family I’ve seen two other people that I could tell were truly native. If I say “oh it doesn’t matter if I don’t look it I am” or “it’s in my blood therefore I am” but it’s more than that it’s about the way you live the things you stick up for the people you surround yourself with it’s much more then the color of your skin or deciding to not celebrate thanksgiving anymore and all of a sudden make frybread cause you want to claim you’re native. Just because it’s in my families past doesn’t mean it’s still around. I’m like 00000000.1% native and I literally know next to nothing compared to people who are 100% or even 50%. And I want to learn I want to learn how to make frybread or bead or speak in a native language I want to be around other native people I want to hear stories and traditions from others I want to learn about the history and the culture I want to belong but I don’t think I should. Even my brother calls us white and asks me why I’m on a “Native American kick” or why I’m “obsessed with native Americans all of a sudden” i just wanted to feel good about myself and feel like I belong so I grabbed that 000000000.1% and ran with it. Ran right off a cliff tbh. I don’t think I should be calling myself Native American if I don’t know next to nothing about them. I don’t think I should be trying to be someone I’m clearly not. I’m just the same loser I was when I was a kid. And I feel even more stupid for wanting to name the kittens Salish and aponi (because it looks like one of the kittens has a butterfly on her face) and for wanting the company jacket that I might not even get to say Salish on the back instead of my name, I am not part of the Salish tribe I have no card I have no certificate I have nothing, I put mmiw and Salish and flathead in my bios on my social medias and it’s basically a lie I mean I know about mmiw and what it stands for but how can I support something like that if I know nothing about it and I’m not native. I’m just for some reason faking the past two years of my life I’m just a total loser bro. I think maybe I’d rather just be unalive. Or like I’ll hear parts in songs or see idols doing something that Native American might find offensive and wrong I I say “oh I see it as representation” or Mia and the butter of the logo change of the winter hawks or the landmarks and name that get changed that I don’t see a problem with but others do yet I’ll say that the teepee in this mv isn’t okay but I was okay with that one Tara mv or I was okay with gildes fire performance but not seungri wearing a headdress or that I find people making and selling headdresses online isn’t okay but me wanting to have one even tho I know you don’t just get one of buy one like all these things that I see “differently” it’s just that I don’t understand because I’m not native enough or not at all or the whole hair argument that’s been bothering me for like a year now that I still don’t understand and why Native American are totally ok with it but it seems like the rest of their culture is something they don’t want to share.

#rant #I get super down sometimes and this is one of the reasons why #I don’t know what’s gonna happen once I post this #might get hate might get criticized but hey #it is what it is #and it’s the Internet it’s just what happens so

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alistairian · 7 months ago

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Father = biological dad, Dad = stepdad

What I've always known: my father was married to my mother for 6 years, and after spending half that time trying for a baby he left for some other woman he met on course (work trip) several weeks before I was due. He didn't want any custody and only saw me once when he came to grab the last of his things. He left my mom with a newborn infant, a house she couldn't afford on her own, plus 2 cats and a dog.

My father has a very large tight-knit family. His parents came to visit me and support my mom after I was born, and one of his sisters kept in touch with my mom over the years. From what I understand the family was pretty split over who to support and people started taking sides. During times when I lived close to that side of the family I would visit my grandparents and aunt and see my cousins. My father was never around during these times, we assumed he lived in Ontario but when the child support payments stopped coming we couldn't track him down and his family was no help. I think at one point when I was little my mom tried to get him to sign off on letting her change my last name from his, and I guess he said no cuz it never happened.

The new information: when I was about 9 my grandfather passed away, I remember my mom crying while telling me, which is notable cuz she is not a cryer. We didn't go to the funeral and I always just assumed it was because of the distance (we lived several hours away).

When I was 17 he asked my mom for permission to reach out to me and offered to start paying child support again while I went to college. I said if he was just going to vanish again and make no effort then I didn't want him to bother. We talked a littld bit. Met when I was 18. He kind of played the victim, talked about how emotional he is and how it's easy for him to start crying. Idk what I was meant to do with that info, pity him? Saw him maybe 2 more times at family gatherings and then we were strangers again. In full honest truth I just didn't really care, I already had a stepdad who was with us since I was 2 so I wasn't missing anything. (Fun sidenote, my dad and father used to be friends. They were diving buddies and one day while they were both on tour (big work trip) they met at a bar and my dad had to confess that he was dating my mom and raising me. That friendship ended right then and there of course)

Turns out my grandfather actually asked to see me before he passed. He was in a hospital and his dying wish was to see all of his grandkids one more time and he asked for me by name. However, my father was there for his dad's passing, and decided that it would be too awkward for him if I was also there, so he denied his OWN dad's dying wish and said I wasn't allowed to go. I was the only one who didn't get to say goodbye and didn't go to the funeral.

I remember when I was starting college and stayed with my grandmother for a few months she mentioned that my grandfather asked to see me when he was dying. It must have slipped up cuz I didn't know this version of the story and didn't know why I wouldn't have been able to see him. I kinda thought she was lying, she tends to overembellish and romanticise things.

During this time was when I was seeing my relatives more at gatherings and birthdays and stuff. I always felt like an outsider or that I was the families ugly secret (didn't help that I was also out as trans at this point) which I figured was just because I typically feel out of place and uncomfortable but it turns out they're all actually just guilty and uncomfortable. I stayed with my aunt for awhile too during this time, the one who stayed in touch with my mom, she was always so nice and made a point to give me space and made sure I wasn't feeling pressured or overwhelmed. It felt like a bit of overcompensation but I figured it was the trans stuff making people a little weird.

My aunt passed a few years ago after her cancer came back. Her oldest daughter rushed to have her wedding early once her mom started getting sick again and she collapsed after the reception. She never left the hospital after that and died about a week later. My father texted me to let me know. Visitation at the hospital was extremely limited due to covid, so I knew I wouldn't have been able to see her.

Another family member commissioned a portrait sketch from me of my aunt to be used at her celebration of life, I offered to do it for free since that was my aunt who took me in and who I was closest to. I was asked to draw the same picture again to be given to my other aunt (her twin), paid for this time, but I never got paid and she never came to pick up the 2nd picture. I reached out a few times, was ghosted. My mom reached out to the twin to see if I could just give her the drawing directly, nothing ever came of it. And once again, I was never even invited to attend the celebration, and we live in the same city this time.

My mom still asks me if my grandmother sends me birthday wishes, because she noticed that she's always making happy bday posts on facebook for all her other grandchildren except me (no, she doesn't send me anything) and honestly now that my aunt has passed I'm pretty much finished with that whole side of the family.

All this to say: hey isn't it fucked up that a man in his 30s abandoned his wife and child and did everything he could to make things as difficult as possible? Hey isn't it fucked up that 10 years later at the age of 40 the same guy denied his father's dying wish, on his deathbed, because the possibility of being in the same room as the child he abandoned was just too uncomfortable? Hey, isn't fucked up that when he did decide he wanted to try he half assed it so bad he made himself out to be the victim and then ended up excluded his adult child from yet another family members funeral? And this time the entire family was complicit because I was right there and everyone knew that my aunt always supported me and my mom? And then they even asked for a service from me, which I provided for FREE, and still nobody had the fucking consideration to maybe oh idk, invite me to say goodbye? My fucking pencil drawing got to participate for christs sakes.

Anyway. Lowkey looking forward to the day he's on his own deathbed mulling over all his regrets and asks to see me before he passes. Then I can tell him no, that's too awkward.

I have the urge to trauma dump about extended family drama and my official (self-appointed) title as the black sheep of the family, but alas. It is already 3am

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thesevro · 4 years ago

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besties / headcanons

𝖋𝖔𝖗 𝖋𝖚𝖘𝖍𝖎𝖌𝖚𝖗𝖔 𝖙𝖔𝖏𝖎, 𝖌𝖔𝖏𝖔 𝖘𝖆𝖙𝖔𝖗𝖚, 𝖆𝖓𝖉 𝖓𝖆𝖓𝖆𝖒𝖎 𝖐𝖊𝖓𝖙𝖔

𝖜𝖔𝖗𝖉 𝖈𝖔𝖚𝖓𝖙: 1.4K words

𝖘𝖚𝖒𝖒𝖆𝖗𝖞: how toji, satoru and kento would act as your best friend

GOJO SATORU

- Gojo may not be very loyal as your boyfriend, but he would definitely be one among your most loyal friends.

- Whenever you're sitting down at some place, literally anywhere, be it at a cafe or on some random stone ledge, he'll let you lean back into him.

- Gojo is tall, and he's somehow always so warm, so treating him as a platonic cuddle buddy would be so nice.

- So imagine you're exhausted from a long day and you find this stout little ledge to rest on. Gojo would sit down with you there.

- You could lean onto him, press your head into his shoulder and Gojo would actually feel very relaxed to have someone he trusts and holds dear next to him.

- Knowing that one of his closest friends is safe calms him to an impossible degree. He knows he's lost too many already.

- And if the day has been too long, he'll let you sleep on his shoulder. Let you enjoy having a little power nap while ignoring the little line of drool that will wet his uniform.

- Hip to hip, your head to his shoulder, it does not feel as romantically intimate as it could be, but he loves that you're here with him all the same. He's always been scared of losing his friends, no matter how well he hides it.

- So he'll keep you warm as you nap on his shoulder.

- PARTING FROM OUR ANGSTIER PARTS... Gojo would be the best hype-man.

- You wearing a dress that barely reaches your knees and flaunts your ass whenever you jump? He'll cheer for you and scream, "THAT'S MY HOT BESTIE!!!"

- You have a crush on some dude? Some gal? He'll get very close with that guy or gal and tell them all the good things about you.

- If you like someone from the school it'll be even worse for you. He would blatantly skip missions just to set your crush up with you as your partner.

- Gojo would be a great, awesome, amazing BFF and you cannot tell me otherwise.

NANAMI KENTO

- Nanami as your friend would just be. Aw.

- He would be the most attentive friend out there.

- You just come back from a mission, hair and clothes a mess, face streaked with blood? He'll let you use his handkerchief to wipe the mess off. And he'll fetch some bandages for you if you need it.

- If you're bed-ridden, he'll stay by your bedside and talk to you there. Silence with him is also just... so nice. So peaceful. So serene.

- Nanami would even make you coffee, tea, whatever it is you like just so he can help you feel more refreshed after whatever tiring mission you went on, or whatever complicated job it was you had to finish.

- He knows what your favorite drink is. What your favorite food is. He also knows the best place to find both.

- Will eat lunch together with you every day at the school, or at yours or his favorite restaurant.

- He can't really make food for you... so he always buys something for lunches at the school with you.

- Sometimes he'll just stand in front of one of the school vending machines, in undeniably deep thought about what your drink of the day could be.

- Whenever he visits your favorite coffee shop, or whatever place sells your favorite drink, he'll ask the cashier to add the specific extras you like incorporating into your drink. He knows all of them.

- AND OKAY. LISTEN. NANAMI WOULD TOTALLY CALL YOU AT THREE A.M. TO RANT ABOUT WORK.

- Of course he would first say something along the lines of, "I must apologize for bothering you. I promise to buy you (insert fav. drink) and (insert fav. food) and (insert fav. dessert) tomorrow. Promise." Then he finally reveals how stressed he is, "But. Are you aware of how much I want to wring Gojo Satoru's neck and kick him off a cliff?"

- It would turn into some sort of comedy, where Nanami mocks every single person who has stressed him out (Gojo Satoru for once in your life just STFU) in that sonorous, baritone rumble of his.

- Imagine hearing something like that at three in the morning. Sometimes it makes you question why it is no one has asked the guy out yet. (AND WHY YOU HAVEN'T DONE THAT EITHER.)

- Nanami would also be the BEST listener.

- You have a problem with something? With someone? Okay. He'll hear you out. Will not interrupt you while you're speaking. Not once will he do that.

- If it's something serious, and you start sniffling or maybe even crying, okay let's be honest he wouldn't really know what to do...

- SO. Because he doesn't know, he'll do what he sees everyone else do.

- He'll hug you. His arms will be stiff and that deep pit of awkwardness will definitely form in his stomach, but if it helps you, he'll do it all the same.

- If this is your first time crying in front of him, he'll only pull out one of his handkerchiefs and hand it to you. Sorry, but he wouldn't know how else to comfort you.

- He'll also comfort you with words of logic. Nanami has that perspicacious outsider's perspective that lets him see the rational portion of everything.

- BUT HE WOULD ALSO BE SO UNDERSTANDING. If you voice that you think your feelings are stupid, or dumb, he would FIRMLY insist that no, no (Y/N), your feelings are not stupid. Your feelings matter to me. And nothing that matters to me is "stupid."

- And he would proceed to help you find a solution to your problem, or would just hear you out some more. You can be honest with him and he would not judge you for any of your feelings.

- In conclusion, Nanami Kento would be the most caring BFF out there.

FUSHIGURO TOJI

- Okay HEAR ME OUT ON THIS. HEAR ME OUT.

- Toji would be an AWESOME best friend.

- He would be the guy you could punch in the arm with abandon.

- Toji would ALSO be the mean tease of a friend who is able to bed you at least once.

- After getting you in his bed though he'll let you go back to the casual thing you share, if that's what you want. But if you want to be together, well... he would be willing to try, but only because you're his friend.

- It may or may not work out. But he does try to make it work. Whether it does in the end... depends.

- MOVING FORWARD, again, Toji would be the friend you could punch without being hit back for it. He'll just be like yeah, okay short stuff then move on.

- He's just someone you could debate with, have fun with, and tease and test to no end.

- AND TOJI is the type of guy who would be super casual about letting people stay over at his house. You had a tiring day? You want to crash at his house? He'll let you.

- You open his door and he'll look at you like he was expecting you, but maybe that's because you'd just ranted about how someone at work had treated you like shit.

- You know. Through the private messaging app only assassins like him use. But since you're his bestie he let you download it too.

- HE CALLS YOU EVERY SINGLE PET NAME OUT THERE TOO

- And he always greets you with, "Something wrong, short stuff?" when you come through the door

- AND HE WOULD EVEN CALL YOU "PRINCESS" WHEN HE REALLY FEELS LIKE PUSHING IT

- And listen bitch even if you're tall... this asshole is literally as tall as Gojo (I think?????) AND he's a DILF. So shut your mouth, short stuff.

- At his house you can either: 1. Order take-out and eat together on the dingy old table someone's great-grandfather used to eat on; he might pay if you really aren't feeling it but he's also an avaricious, money-hoarding bitch (in other words, broke) soooo don't expect much. Or 2. Just sleep on his couch while he watches TV. His bed smells like shit and really his couch isn't any better buuutt at least it doesn't have... stains.

- And please, don't even think about venting your feelings to this guy. He would either laugh his ass off at you or only nod with a tight smile of discomfort on his face.

- Princess, he won't be tucking you into bed, but he'll definitely have some leftover pizza ready for you in the morning. His love language is lazy as hell, but it's love all the same.

- Though your pizza will most definitely be either burnt or cold as shit.

- But either way, he cares.

- So if you're feeling down because someone looked at you wrong in the streets, expect to see a "Missing Person's Report" on the news in the morning.

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morganaspendragonss · 3 years ago

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(show me) who i am and who i could be

set post-3.16, in which owen and tk start to talk title from son by sleeping at last ao3 | 1.3k | father-son relationship, hurt/comfort, guilt, past character death

Though his bones are aching for a drink and his instincts are telling him to wallow alone, Owen doesn’t go home once he’s back in Austin. Talking to his father unlocked something in him that’s been hidden away since 1984, and while he would normally try to block it all out again, he’s trying to be better lately.

TK looks surprised when he slides open the loft’s door, and even more so when Owen drags him into a hug, but Owen pays it no mind. He’s made a lot of mistakes when it comes to TK, but he’ll forever regret letting this distance grow between them, letting it get to the point where his son is shocked to see him at the front door.

He squeezes TK’s shoulders tight. “Good to see you, son,” he whispers roughly, letting the hug drag on for a few more seconds before letting go.

“Good to see you, too.” TK’s frown follows Owen as he walks across to the couch, eyes roaming around the corners of his son’s home. “Dad, are you okay?”

��Yeah, I’m good, I’m… I’m good. Where’s Carlos?”

“He’s on shift,” TK replies over the snick of the door locking.

Owen goes to sit, but his eyes catch on a framed portrait of Gwyn, standing right next to one of Carlos with his mother, and it’s like all the air has been sucked out of the room.

So many things they left unsaid… Owen wonders—would his father think him so brave if he knew everything he had done?

“Dad?”

Owen blinks, then plasters on a smile as he looks over at his son. TK’s brow is creased in confusion and worry, and his movements are slow as he sits on the couch, his gaze studying him closely. Owen doesn’t know why he’s pretending nothing’s wrong; the whole point of this visit is to stop doing that, or at least start to stop. But, while there are truths TK should know—truths Owen wants him to know—there are still sides of him TK can’t see. Ever, if Owen can help it.

“Remember when I told you why I became a firefighter?”

TK nods. “Yeah, sure. The little girl you saved from drowning, right?”

“Yeah.” Owen spares himself one last hesitation before it’s too late, then forces himself onwards. “That was true, but it…may not exactly have been the whole truth. That is to say, that was the moment I really decided firefighting was my calling, I guess, but there were other—things—that pushed me to do it.”

“Okay.” TK keeps nodding along, but Owen can tell he’s getting more and more confused with every passing second.

He sits forward in his chair, passing a hand over his face. “When I called you the other day, I wasn’t just out for a drive. I went back to California to visit your grandfather.”

“My— California?” The crease on TK’s brow deepens and he shakes his head. “Why didn’t you say anything? I mean, my whole life… You’ve never spoken about my grandfather, I just assumed he was—”

TK cuts himself off before he can say it, but Owen doesn’t blame him for the assumption. He always acted like his father was dead; sometimes he almost willed himself to believe it. Maybe that made him a bad person, but it was easier to think him dead, instead of just living his life, not bothering to contact his son.

He sees now that he could have tried, too, but that’s Strand men for you. Stubborn and unwilling to be the first to bend.

“Yeah, well.” Owen sighs, shrugging. “This was the first time I so much as saw him in forty years, and it’s likely to be the last. He’s not well. Dying, actually.”

“Dad…”

But this isn’t what he came here to tell TK, not truly, so Owen barrels on. “I want to apologise to you, for breaking our family up after the Towers. I was a little older than you were when my parents got divorced and my mom moved us to New York, but I can’t imagine it hurts any differently. I know it doesn’t actually, because it was me who broke things when I was a kid, too. Or…” He closes his eyes and hangs his head, shaking it slightly. “He told me it wasn’t my fault, but I’m still sort of working on believing that.”

A touch on his leg; Owen looks up in surprise, noting that, at some point, TK moved closer. His eyes are big and concerned, and he looks half a second from calling for reinforcements—if not an ambulance.

“Dad, I… You’re really worrying me,” he says, squeezing Owen’s knee. “What’s going on?”

Owen swallows once, twice. There’s a lump in his throat that’s been there since he was 12 years old, forbidding him from talking at that point in his life; that moment when everything changed.

But not anymore.

“I had a brother. Have, technically—my father married again after the divorce and had more kids—but that’s not… My brother, the brother I grew up with, he died when we were just kids. He was ten, I was twelve. We—”

“Dad.” TK interrupts him firmly, shaking his head. “Dad, you don’t need to tell me about this. Really.” He smiles, but Owen waves him off.

“I want to,” he says. “You deserve to know. You’re named after him, you know?”

“Really?”

“Yeah,” Owen chuckles lightly. “The Kennedy part was your mother’s idea, but my brother was called Tyler. I thought… I don’t know. I thought it would be fitting, and I suppose it was. Too much, maybe.”

TK winces at that, and Owen instantly regrets his words. It’s true, his son’s many near-death experiences have rattled him and may have reminded him too much of his brother, especially the most recent, but he shouldn’t… TK can’t take the burden of that.

“Don’t apologise,” he says, anticipating TK’s next words. His son’s mouth snaps shut, but the guilty look isn’t wiped from his face, which makes Owen’s guilt increase tenfold.

He’s really starting to see why people think they’re so alike.

He clears his throat and flashes a quick, small smile at TK. “Look, that—that’s not the point. It was a surfing accident. I shouldn’t have let him go out there, but he was so eager and I just wanted to make him happy. I thought I could keep him safe. Instead… A wave took him under and I couldn’t get to him in time. I couldn’t save him. That’s when I— That’s when our family broke, and I…I’m so sorry for letting the same thing happen to us. To you. I’m sorry for all the secrets, and the fights, and for allowing things to get like this between us. I’m going to fix it, I promise.”

A long silence falls after Owen’s words. TK’s chin is resting on his folded hands and his eyes are unfocused, his bottom lip pulled between his teeth. He blinks a few times and shakes his head, as though he’s having a silent conversation in his head. Owen waits, almost with bated breath, to see what the verdict is.

Eventually TK breathes out shakily and turns back to him, a sad smile on his lips.

“You don’t need to apologise either,” he says, more kindly than Owen believes he deserves. “This… None of it is your fault. Not your brother, and not—not what happened with our family. Not entirely. And it’s not all on you to fix it. It’s on us. We’re going to make this right. We’ve got this, Dad.”

It’s a real smile he gets this time, and for the first time in a while, Owen finds himself able to send one back.

And maybe, just maybe, some of the guilt can start to burn away.

#911 lone star #911 lone star fic #owen strand #tk strand #lone star #911ls #fanfiction #my fanfiction #writing #my writing #userbones #userjillian #tusersilence #tusererica #tuserpaige #useream #kirassunshine #actuallysara #reyeslonestartag

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millenialfanfictionaddiction · 3 years ago

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Go Go Karasuno: An Old Rival (Pt 2 )

THIS FIC IS 18+

Warnings: swearing

Word Count: 7,000+

A few days had passed since the practice match. You hated to admit it, but you thought about Keishin often.

He looked good.

Really REALLY good.

Like better than high school good. He always looked nice but it was overshadowed by his complete desire to be an utter ass.

You sighed as you finished up a few emails to send off before you took your grandma to the hospital to visit your grandfather.

He was set to be discharged in a few days and then you would start the process of moving them to the elderly community. You had taken your grandmother to visit him daily as she would often have make him meals. He hated the hospital food. He said the flavor was lacking.

You had to laugh. The man had only ever eaten your grandmother's cooking since they married at a young age. He often complained or refused to eat any other food because it was never was good as his wife’s cooking.

You had to agree. Your grandma was an amazing cook.

You arrive at the hospital with your grandma in toe. She says her hellos to the staff as they all reciprocate the greetings. Your grandma was a complete sweetheart. She was loved and adored by everyone. She always helped when and where she could, volunteering wherever she was needed. You're actually surprised your grandfather managed to charm his way in to her life.

Your grandfather was a rowdy old man. Literally the opposite of your grandmother. He could be bitter and always liked a good argument. He was never outright mean to people, just very outspoken and upfront. He was a lot to handle.

You exit the elevator carrying the box of food your grandma had prepared. She told you she was preparing a meal for your grandfather's roommate as well. She said the man was just as insatiable as your grandfather. You imagined they were quite the duo.

As you round the corner you start the head arguing. You eyes widen as you realize it's coming from your grandfather's room.

Your grandma just smiles as she shakes her head knocking lightly at the door.

"Yeah yeah" a voice shouts.

You both enter as you begin to observe the sight before you eyes.

Your grandfather and his roommate are watching volleyball on the small TV in their hospital room. Shouting at the apparent bad plays.

"Anyone could have hit that set with their eyes closed" your grandfather shouted "what is that spiker doing?"

"He's just a weakling like all the others" the other man shouted "that wouldn't be happening under my coaching."

You roll your eyes and smile. Man these two were made for each other.

Your grandma slowly starts to unpack and plate the food she made for both the men. They continue to watch the game as your grandma hands them the food.

"Dont worry dear I packed enough for everyone" she smiled as you observed all the food. The box was heavy that you carried in but you didn't think there was an entire week's worth of food there.

"By everyone did you mean the entire hospital gran" you giggle as she laughs.

"Oh Y/N" your grandfather says as he looks up from his meal for a second "this is my roommate. You might know his grandson. I think he went to school with him."

The other man grumbled "I apologize if you do know him, the weakling."

You smile as you chuckle "Well sir its nice to meet you, I'm Y/N"

The older man turns to you smiling "oh I know who you are sweetheart, I'm Ikkei Ukai"

WHAT DID HE SAY?

You were about to speak when a knock sounded.

"Yeah yeah, what is this grand central in Tokyo?" your grandfather huffed as the door opened.

"Just came to check on my fav-" Keishin spoke as he entered, shutting the door and turning around.

His eyes were met with yours. He gulped as the two older men and older lady looked at you both.

"Y/N, I didn't know you would be here" Keishin says as he lifts his head to the back of his head.

"I told you last week my roommate had a granddaughter your age" Ikkei spoke sharped tongue.

"Well you didn't mention here name!" Keishin glared at his grandfather.

“You didn’t ask” Ikkei huffed as he turned his attention back to the game as Keishin placed his hand over his face.

You giggle at the circumstances.

This all had to be a joke right? No way this was coincidence!

"Ah Keishin it's so good to see you again" your grandmother says breaking the awkward silence "here have a plate"

"Oh you as well ma'am" he said bowing "thank you ma'am but I'll have to pass I’m just stopping by quick"

"Sit down you idiot the women made great food" your grandfather shouts at Keishin as you chuckle.

Your grandmother makes him a plate as he settles in by you at the spare table in the corner. Your grandmother sits beside your grandfather as he kisses her forehead. You smile as you watch them, all while Keishin watches you.

"Your grandfather and mine are one in the same" he says trying to break the silence.

"Ha ha yeah you can say that again" you say smiling as you eat.

"I honestly didn't know your grandfather was his roommate" he says.

"Well you probably wouldn't. They are my mothers parents so we don't share the same last name" you say looking down at your plate.

"You know, it was really great to see you play again Y/N" Keishin smiles at you.

You look up smiling back "Thank you. It was a lot of fun. You really have some great kids."

"Kageyama and Hinata couldn't stop talking about your sets. Kageyama said they were almost perfect" he said taking another bite

"Well I wouldn't say perfect. They can always use improvement" you say pushing your food around the plate.

"Give yourself more credit Y/N. You really are a great setter. I always thought so" Keishin says as he stares at you.

You laugh ironically "is that why you were always such an ass to me then?"

Keishin sighs "yeah I was an ass but it wasn't because you weren't good. I was stupid high school kid"

You sighed as you look to his smiling "I guess we've both changed a lot"

Keishin smiled softly at you as you take both plates and disguarded them in the bin.

"I'm going to step outside for a minute" you speak, kissing your grandma on the forehead.

"I'll come with you" Kishin says as you begin to walk outside

The silence is awkward. Neither of you know what to say to each other. It's like your years of high school rivalry has been reduced to this weird state of unknown.

"Look Y/N" keishin starts.

"Keishin" you interject "we both changed. It's ok. I'm not mad at you anymore."

That wasn't completely factual nor completely a lie.

You didn't hate Keishin. In fact, thinking about it, you never really did. You admired the man but he annoyed you to no end. He was always better than you and you were jealous.

Keishin threw his cigarette as he walked towards you "Y/N I want to apologize."

You look at him with narrowed eyes "for what?"

"Well one for being a complete jerk back in high school" he proceeds.

"Jerk is an understatement but continue" you say smiling.

He laughs awkwardly "Listen Y/N can I at least make it up to you?"

You fold your arms "ok and how Keishin? It's not like we can go back in time and you can not mess up my serves" you spit as he looks towards the ground.

"Y/N please" Keishin says "my grandfather was right, I was a weakling back then. I was jealous of you. You had such talent and well, I enjoyed getting a rile from you. I know it was immature but it was the only way you'd talk to me."

“Wait what” you think as you try to process what he was saying

"I always admired you Y/N. You were a great captain and a fantastic setter. You worked so well all the players on your team. I honestly was a bit jealous" he continues as you state at him confused.

Keishin was jealous? Of you?

You say the only thing you can properly formulate "Well Keishin you sure had a hell of a way of showing it! You pissed me off, annoyed me to no end and now you tell me you were jealous?"

Keishin stares at your outburst.

"Keishin I apologize for yelling but it just seems unreal to me. I spent all of high school trying be as good as you and now your telling me you looked up to me? It just seems unreal" you say as you sit on the bench.

"Y/N" Keishin sits down in the other side of the bench "I know I was a complete jerk. I honestly didn't know it bothered you so much. I was a punk ass kid who was just trying to be someone. But I now realize I hurt someone who really meant a lot of me."

You look up from your hands to see Keishin with a soft smile on his face.

"Well this is awkward" you say as you stand up. You were never great with upfront feelings and awkward silences.

"Y/N please" Keishin says as you start to walk back to the room "Please just let me make it up to you. Let's have dinner. I promise. Just hear me out"

You sigh knowing the conversation was unavoidable. It wasn't that you didn't want to have dinner with Keishin, it's just that you still reeled from your past.

Maybe you were being petty and it seemed like Keishin had changed but were you really ready to admit that? Were you really ready to move on from a grudge you held for almost 10 years?

"Where" you sigh in defeat.

"Huh?" Keishin looks to you with question.

"Where and when" you look back at him with a less than eager face.

"How about Friday night? My families store?" Keishin shouts a little too enthusiastic.

You chuckle at his response "ok but I swear of you start shit I'm going to pelt a volleyball right at your forehead"

He laughs "there's the Y/N I remember"

You push him playfully as you both walk back into the hospital heading to your grandfather's room.

You enter the floor as you both hear loud shouting. You look at each other and take off running towards your grandfather's room. You bust open the door with Keishin on your heals as you see your grandfather on the floor and your grandmother holding her mouth.

"I'm fine I'm fine just got a bit worked up" he says.

Keishin moves to help your grandfather as you console your grandmother.

"Grandpa really? Getting worked up over volleyball?" You spit at him.

He glares at you "you're one to talk Y/N!"

Keishin’s eyes widen as you glare holes on your grandfather's head. He chuckles at your response.

"Oh Y/N it's about time you forgive the boy, it's been almost 10 years" your grandfather says

"Dont forgive him so easily Y/N" Ikkei interjects "make him work for it"

Keishin glares at his grandfather as he chuckles with your grandfather and they continue watching the game.

You and Keishin both sigh as you smile softly towards one another.

You're night out with Keishin approaches faster than you hoped. Honestly you were really indifferent about the whole situation. You had to admit, Keishin had probably changed since high school. I mean the Keishin you knew would never coach a high school volleyball team.

Right?

#keishin #ukai keishin #ukai #keishin x y/n #justiceforthehaikyuucoachs #haikyuu #haikyuucoaches #haikyuu!!#haikyū!!#karasuno

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bouncingkadachi · 3 years ago

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Blessed Rain

Summary: A Hunter’s weapon of choice says a lot about them. OR: Kyle upgrades his weaponry and gets caught red-handed in the act. Luckily (?) for him, only Tsukino seems to know exactly why he's having an emotional crisis over this.

Word count: 3,260

Note(s): set post-game

Also available on AO3!

Kyle’s had his new bow for a good couple of weeks before the feel of the limbs and the weight of the draw became comfortable enough for him to consider upgrading it. If he’s going to be injured, he reasons, he’d rather it be purely by way of monster and not because he pulls a muscle wrestling with a bow that hasn’t been properly broken in. His wallet despairs as he forks over the zenny, but this’ll hopefully let him take on some of the bigger hunts like the ones that Reverto goes on. It’ll all be worth the investment up front once he has his completely finished bow and restocked his coatings and finally drops the last of his coin on a couple new talismans.

He refuses to think about the implications of his reasoning with a literal coin, rolling it around and around his fingers as he pushes through the market throngs towards the smithy’s. Perhaps he ought to have a change of scenery—the fog-shrouded summits of Terga were said to be particularly beautiful at this time of year, and the heat in Lamure was becoming just shy of unbearable.

The final product that the blacksmith puts into his hands when he finally makes it to collect is nothing short of gorgeous. Blessed Rain is sleek where his old Rex bow was bulky, far lighter and certainly not as clunky. The upgrades on the riser gives the entire weapon a pleasant solidness in his hand, yet the delicately reinforced plating on the limbs doesn’t retract at all from its flexibility. The decorative grip protector gleams. Just looking at it makes Kyle excited to shoot.

“Bring her back if you’re finding that you need anything adjusted,” the smith tells him after Kyle’s diligently inspected every inch of the bow. “Kept the poundage the same for you, but added another inch to the draw length like you asked.”

“Thanks,” Kyle says. Eventually, he’d like to work up to the point where he can up the poundage again. Even just another five pounds would be good. He can do most of the hunts in his skill range alone now, but extra firepower would make him just that much more efficient, or that much of a better support for team hunts.

The smith laughs when Kyle sheepishly admits this. “Well, I always like to help a Hunter improve, and you know where to find me,” he says cheerily, clapping Kyle enthusiastically on the shoulder. “Come by again anytime if you need a tune up or want to test out something new.”

And with that, he waves Kyle away so that another Hunter can step up, holding a tired-looking sword and shield and looking equally exhausted. “Aye, rookie Hunter?” Kyle hears as he wanders off to find a more relaxed corner of the market in which to admire his new bow some more. “If you’ve got the materials I can repair and upgrade that for you.” The conversation peters out and melts into the general din of the marketplace as Kyle slips into the crowd, taking care to step out of the way of a Felyne carrying an absolutely massive basket groaning with produce. He watches the precarious load totter away, trying and failing to locate Tsukino in the brief respite the parted crowd affords him. They’d split earlier that morning and he hasn’t seen her since.

He still hasn’t managed to find even a whisker of Tsukino’s whereabouts by the time he settles into a decently quiet nook next to a stall selling all manner of spices. Pity, because the dappled light spilling through the colorful drapes of the marketplace catches so beautifully on the milky-white sheen of the bow, and he’d been looking forward to showing it to her. As a Hunter, Kyle will always care more about weapon practicality than aesthetics, but as a normal human being he certainly won’t turn down the opportunity to have both an aesthetically pleasing and perfectly functional weapon. He’s still grinning a little when he goes to strap the bow to his back, and it’s in the process of looking up that his gaze catches onto wide eyes staring plainly at him from across the street.

He freezes, arm suspended awkwardly halfway to sheathing. His beautiful bow glints damningly in the bright Lamure sunlight as his unexpected friend wades through the throngs of people towards him, gesturing for him to stay put with a wave of her hand that really can’t be mistaken for anything other than a greeting.

“Hey,” he says cautiously and lamely when she finally reaches him. Belatedly, he remembers to lower his arm. He is momentarily thankful that she doesn’t try to reach up for his face in the Mahanan greeting, although his goodwill evaporates when she leans in to inspect his bow, body thrumming with unexplainable anticipation.

“Oh, that’s pretty,” she says finally. Kyle can’t help himself from preening just a little, shifting his grip so that she can get a better look. After all, what was the point of spending all that money and materials if there was no one to excitedly show the end product off to? Besides, it’s been a while since they last saw each other. Last he heard, she had been traveling, keen to finally see the world on her own terms and at her own pace.

“It’s fresh off an upgrade,” he answers smugly. “Easier to handle than the Rex.”

“Slightly less intimidating though,” she chimes in, and Kyle bristles, not liking where this conversation is going. And true to form, she goes in for the kill: “Mizutsune? I recognize the plating.”

Kyle can feel the flush crawling up to his ears. Logically, he knows that there’s nothing for him to be embarrassed about. It’s a mark of good smithing that one can tell at a glance which monster a weapon was inspired by, and a Mizutsune was both powerful and extremely iconic. This bow in particular had good stats and the ability to fire rapidly, which admittedly took him some time to get used to after focusing mostly on piercing shots. The paralysis coating that works so well on this bow has also already saved his skin on more than one occasion. There is little more a career Hunter can ask for out of his weapon. It’s not like he’d been heading out to Pomore Garden at any given opportunity and holding onto an increasing multitude of Mizutsune materials just because he wanted some physical reminder of what was probably the most pivotal moment of his life, something that never failed to put a very complicated and jumbled mess of emotions deep within his chest whenever he thought back to it.

He’s starting to feel very, very hot under his collar. The sun is terrible. He resolves that his next big hunt really needs to be somewhere outside of Lamure.

His friend, however, just looks more and more baffled as he launches into an unprompted defense of his newest purchase. Every time she opens her mouth, Kyle talks a little faster. Eventually, she doesn’t even bother trying to interject, which is arguably worse, because instead she just looks progressively more and more thoughtful. Kyle wished desperately for Tsukino to peel away from whatever hidey hole she was tucked in. Then, his train of thought screeches into a rude and abrupt halt.

“What,” he croaks. “What are you doing.”

One of her brows quirks up. “I sure hope your eyes are still working because that’d be a detriment to your job,” she says plainly. “What does it look like I’m doing? I promise it’s not a trick question.”

What she’s doing is holding Kyle’s hand—the one not clutching his new bow—the one that had apparently been waving about with increasing agitation as he jabbered on and on. What Kyle doesn’t understand is why. It’s not like he just did some impressive shot to give them the edge in a battle or anything else that was cool and hand-holding worthy. He’d just been yammering about bow mechanics, and maybe embarrassingly dipping into his talisman hopes and dreams. He stares a little helplessly at his trapped hand. Her kinship stone winks up at him.

“Look,” she says patiently, when it becomes very clear that Kyle is going to need a moment before he can get his brain back online. “There’s nothing wrong with a bow made from Mizutsune parts and I am the last person who will ever turn down pretty things. What I was going to say was that this is an interesting departure from your whole—” She pauses, as though looking for a specific word. “Well, your whole image as a very grown-up and serious and intimidating Hunter or whatever it was you were trying to convey with that scowl you used to like so much. And you weren’t letting me get a single word in.”

“You’re getting plenty of words in now,” Kyle scowls, just to be contrary. “And I’ve grown since then.”

“Someone’s in a mood today.” She smiles, crinkle-eyed, up at him. Kyle very seriously debates wrenching his hand out of her hold like he did the last time this happened and then pointedly doesn’t act on the impulse.

“Why’re you in Lulucion?” he asks instead with a truly remarkable level of self-restraint. “Thought you’d never want to come back again after what happened.”

She shrugs, the greatsword on her back heaving with the movement. “Guess I’ve grown too,” she says loftily, though she sobers quickly. “I was actually visiting my grandfather. He used to go back to Mahana around this time of year… he can’t do it anymore of course but I’ve got Ratha now, so I figured I could do it instead. And then I figured I’d stop by Rutoh before going home, to see Ena and Alwin and wheedle a few more stories out of them.”

She lets go of Kyle’s hand. He tries not to miss it. “Even Ratha can’t make the trip in one go, and Lulucion was closest, so we’re stopping to rest. I dropped by the Scrivener’s Lodge earlier because I was hoping Reverto could give me a few weapon pointers as I’ve saved up just about enough for an upgrade, but they told me that he was out on an urgent mission and wouldn’t be back for a while.”

“Oh,” Kyle says, a little stung that she hadn’t come specifically to see him first, out of all the Hunters in the city. He’s slightly mollified when she grins at him, though.

“And then I met Tsukino by the cannons. She said I could find you here, so here I am.”

“I don’t know anything about greatswords,” Kyle blurts out, and immediately wants to kick himself. She blinks at him, and then bursts into laughter.

“I was just going to ask the smith,” she wheezes when she’s got herself somewhat back under control. “Can’t I see a friend just to say hi to him anymore?” Kyle stares very intently down at some of the finer detailing on his bow.

“Where is my Palico anyway?” he finally settles on, falling into a tried and true grumble. “I haven’t seen her all day.”

She waves her hand vaguely in the air. “Navirou said something about getting donuts. I wasn’t really listening.”

But there was a donut stand right here in the marketplace, Kyle wanted to cry out. He should have seen Tsukino by now if they’d really been going to buy snacks! And how was it possible that he had missed Navirou in his entirety, between the Felyne’s penchant for wearing ridiculous little outfits and his inability to shut up?

“Why? You have a hunt you need to run off to?”

“Yes,” Kyle says hotly. It’s a lie. He’d accepted a subquest that wouldn’t depart until later that evening for the sole purpose of testing out his new weapon in a relatively stress-free environment. Before that, he’d just planned on hitting up the shooting range in the training arena to break in the new string. His schedule was very, very free. Tsukino was perfectly aware of that.

His eyes widened. Tsukino had been with him on every excursion into the Gardens. She went where he did (usually), and it’s not like Kyle would ever begrudge her a visit home. But she’d been with him every step of every single Mizutsune job he’d ever taken—had watched him craft traps when he needed to capture and had kept watch for opportunists hoping to sneak up as he’d carved. She’d been the one who’d recommended the spinner for all the excess purplefur he was ending up with. At first, he’d simply thought that she’d wanted the thread to mend some of her own items, or to send back home to her brethren, but instead she’d tucked each skein of vibrant, silk-soft thread into the bottom of his pouch with gentle paws, cryptically talking about how strong a material it was, and how nice it looked when woven. Kyle has never touched a loom in his life, but now he’s looking at someone who he definitely knows has.

His stomach drops. Hadn’t Tsukino looked particularly smug ever since he’d lingered on the blueprints for Blessed Rain after getting a look at its stats and required materials?

“She got me,” he groans. His friend just looks at him bemusedly, though perhaps with a touch of wariness at his ferocious frown. Hastily, he tacks on: “It’s nothing. I, uh—I just remembered that I needed to tell Tsukino something. Important. Later, when I find her again.”

“Alright,” she says, though she doesn’t quite look like she believes him. “A quest’s a quest, though, so I won’t keep you here. The bow really is pretty though. I know I just said it doesn’t match your image and all but I really don’t think you can go wrong with something you like. You’ve got the skills for it, anyway.”

“Thanks,” he croaks, feeling a little overwhelmed. He manages two whole steps out of the nook before he pauses, worrying at his lower lip. “Actually,” he says sharply, spinning around on his heel and nearly causing his friend to startle right into a spice display. “How long are you staying for?”

“However long it’ll take to upgrade my sword, I guess,” she says after she collects herself, the words lilting into a question. “Three days or so, I guess?” She skirts nervously away from the glaring vendor, careful not to overbalance on her greatsword.

“Cool,” Kyle says with a nod, steeling himself. “Great, even. Look, how about this. Your last visit to Lulucion was terrible—” an understatement, “—so when I get back from my hunt I’ll show you some of the better sights Lulucion has to offer. There’s a hole in the wall that I think you’ll like. Dad used to take me after hunts—they grill really nice queen shrimp. And the parapets—you can climb them, and they’ve got all these little carvings in the stone that you can search for like a scavenger hunt.” He’s keenly aware that he’s rambling again, but she looks interested, so he barrels on. “I’ll come pick you up tomorrow just as soon as I can get a nap in. We can stay in the city or take Ratha out to the Barrens, down by the water. Just make a day of it.” He’s pretty certain that he looks at her with something akin to hope as she considers. It feels like a lifetime before she finally comes to a decision.

“I want to take Ratha out in the evening,” she says finally. “I don’t want him to be cooped up too long here ever again.”

“Yeah,” Kyle breathes out, the word rushing out of him in a flood of relief. “Yeah, I can work around that.” She beams at him.

“I’ll look forward to it,” she says, sincere and looking more than a little surprised despite herself at the prospect of looking forward to doing anything in Lulucion. “I’m staying at the inn closest to the stables. Pretty sure I’m the only Rider there currently so they’ll know who I am.” Kyle nods, and lets himself get his hand squeezed again, though not without her hands first hovering in an instinctual bid for his cheeks before she remembers herself.

“Good luck on your hunt. If I see Tsukino I’ll let her know you’re looking for her.”

“She’ll show up in due time,” he mutters darkly. “I’ll let you know if Reverto gets back early or if he’s just been loafing around this entire time. For your next upgrade or whatever.” She laughs, bright, and then slips off into the crowd to wrestle her way into the smithy’s queue. Kyle is left staring in her wake before his gaze is drawn back down to his bow.

“This is all your fault,” he tells it. Predictably, it doesn’t answer. Also predictably, Tsukino takes that exact moment to drop down from seemingly nowhere.

“I didn’t know we had another job lined up,” the Felyne says delicately, carefully brushing crumbs off of her coat. Kyle groans, sheathing his weapon.

“Don’t tease me,” he huffs. “I’m going to the shooting range. Are you coming?”

“Hmm,” says Tsukino. “I suppose I can spare the time.”

“Of course you can spare the time!” Kyle hisses, indignant. “You just spent the day eating donuts and eavesdropping!” He pointedly doesn’t look towards the smithy, where his friend was patiently browsing the display while another Hunter was getting their hammer looked at.

“One must always be prepared with the latest intel,” Tsukino says mildly. “I’m glad the upgrade went well.”

“It’s got good stats,” Kyle protests weakly in what is quickly becoming a tired argument. “The rapid shots have been going very well. And I had a surplus of Mizutsune parts.”

“Yes,” his hunting partner agrees readily enough. “Have you thought of what you’re going to do with the thread?”

“This conversation is finished,” Kyle says abruptly, making a very determined push towards the market’s exit. “Either come or don’t, so long as we meet at the gate for tonight’s hunt.”

Tsukino looks at him with exasperated fondness, which is frankly a little insulting, but readily falls into step next to him. Kyle wonders how many rounds he’s going to have to shoot in order to clear his head again and rid it of thoughts of Hazepetal Garden or Mizutsune or high-grade thread that he’ll never use himself. He’ll examine them again someday—because he’s not a coward—but that day is most certainly not today.

He does his rounds in the training arena and marvels at the way the string slides off his fingers with a satisfying twang, even though it’ll still be a good few days before it’s fully broken in to his liking. Tsukino’s saved him a donut, the cakey sweet sticky with honey and practically melting in his mouth. He’s got some free time even after stocking up for the evening hunt, so he takes a few minutes to browse the quest board, taking careful note of the jobs that were situated near the Harzgai Rocky Hill, or the ones from further afield in Alcala that’ll take him closer to Rutoh. And when he leaves the city, he pointedly doesn’t look up at the familiar shape circling in the dusky sky, even as he knows that they’ll surely see the last rays of the setting sun winking off of the plates of his bow like a beacon.

#was anyone going to tell me that HR Kyle gets a MIZU BOW #You were just going to withhold this vital piece of information from me?#anyway here's 3k words about the significance of Mizutsune to one (1) boy that I love #I wrote this specifically with my idiot in mind #but asides from the gender and a few other lines I guess you can generalize to any other Rider #monster hunter kyle #monster hunter stories 2 #Annie writes

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ibijau · 3 years ago

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Futures Past pt14 / On AO3

three conversations as Nie Huaisang's time in Gusu comes to an end

Summer had finally come to an end, implacable heat replaced by a more pleasant warmth as the world took on new hues. It also meant that the final few exams of the year were fast approaching, though Nie Huaisang felt unconcerned. He’d been ordered to fail after all, not that he thought he could have succeeded even if he’d tried.

Comforted by that permission to not study, he was currently laying in the grass in the back hills of the Cloud Recesses, enjoying the afternoon sun. A history book, chosen for the promise of the many scandals it revealed about a past emperor’s reign, laid forgotten on his chest, Nie Huaisang having realised that the contents were far more serious than he felt like dealing with at the moment. At some other time he might have taken a nap, encouraged by the warmth, but he’d found it difficult to sleep since that visit of his future self a few days earlier.

Just as Nie Huaisang was about to pick up his book again, Su She finished his series of sword forms and came to lay on the grass as well. He was sweaty and looked tired, but appeared quite happy with himself. Su She had confessed that he’d made a real leap forward with his cultivation since teachers and other disciples stopped constantly putting him down, something for which Nie Huaisang felt as proud as if it had been his own progress.

They stayed silent for a while, just basking in the sun, enjoying that beautiful day, until Nie Huaisang found that his recent worries were too heavy on his chest and he had to share them.

“Su-xiong?”

Su She made a noise to signify he’d heard, but couldn’t be bothered to speak. He looked comfortable, and had closed his eyes as if he might succeed with the nap that eluded Nie Huaisang. It was almost a shame to ruin that.

“Do you think people can be so evil that nothing will redeem them?”

The silence changed around them. After a moment Su She sat up to get a look at Nie Huaisang. Finding him looking serious, Su She’s initial puzzlement quickly turned into mild irritation at being dragged into a discussion like that on such a pleasant afternoon.

“Gusu Lan’s principles state that…”

“Not you as a Lan disciple,” Nie Huaisang cut him with an impatient gesture. “You as a person. Do you think people can be so evil that there’s no going back for them, that nothing they could do or say would ever compensate for what they’ve done?”

Some of Su She’s irritation eased away, glad as always to be given a chance to voice an opinion that wasn’t that of his sect, and he laid down on the grass again.

“That’s a pretty intense question,” Su She said after a moment. “I guess there’s got to be a limit to what’s forgivable, yeah. I’m not the best to decide what that’d be though. I’ve been told I have an issue with holding grudges. But I think yeah, in general, there’s got to be a moment where a bad person becomes so bad there’s no going back and they just need to be eliminated.”

It wasn’t the answer Nie Huaisang had been hoping for, but it didn’t exactly surprise him either. He thought the same after all, if only because a person such as Wen Ruohan existed, proving to him that some people had to be beyond redemption.

“Then do you think…”

“What’s wrong with you today? Was this morning’s lecture about ethics again?”

“It was about the proper way to address people depending on family and allegiance links, and I fell asleep. No, this is something else. I’m just thinking about stuff lately.”

“Like good and evil? That must have been a pretty nasty nap you took.”

Nie Huaisang shrugged. “I just wonder what makes a person bad or good. Do you think some people can be bad from birth? Just, they’re born and they’re evil, and there’s no way they’re ever going to be anything but evil.”

It really bothered him, the things his future self had said during his last visit. About Lan Xichen, about Su She, but mostly the way he’d spoken of that Xue Yang boy, as if that child were no better than a cockroach needing to be squashed before it could proliferate.

“I think there’s definitely people who think that about some other people,” Su She said. “I’m pretty sure if you asked some of the other Lan disciples, they’d say I’m like that, just because I have a temper and I don’t hug their knees quite enough and I ask too many questions during some lessons. I guess it’s easier to hate someone if you tell yourself they’re the worst and they deserve it.”

“You’re not evil!” Nie Huaisang cried out, reaching out for his friend’s hand. “You’re not! I’ll fight anyone who says you are!”

Surprised by that outburst, Su She blinked a few times then snorted, pushing away Nie Huaisang’s hand.

“I appreciate it, but it didn’t go so well last time you tried to fight for my honour.”

“I’ll still fight all of them!”

Su She laughed, but appeared quite happy to hear that. Even now that other Lans gave him less of a hard time, he still liked being reminded that Nie Huaisang was on his side, just as he made sure Nie Huaisang knew the opposite was true as well.

That was why Nie Huaisang was telling him about his thoughts, rather than going to Lan Qiren or even Lan Xichen who surely might have more elaborate opinions on the matter of good and evil. Su She might not have read quite as much, but he was also less likely to judge Nie Huaisang for asking that kind of thing. Besides, since Su She’s opinions were often less polished, they felt more honest than if he’d quoted great thinkers of the past.

“But really, do you think a person can actually be evil from birth?” Nie Huaisang insisted when Su She had stopped laughing. “Like. Like a child, but they’re evil. Do you think that’s possible?”

Su She grabbed a strand of grass, and started twisting it between his fingers.

“Maybe. But like I said, people will mostly say that about someone they don’t like, or someone that doesn’t play by their rules, or else they’re not from a prestigious family and they’re just doing what they have to survive.”

He paused to pluck some more grass to play with, and started constructing a knot with it.

“I have a great-uncle I’ve never met,” Su She explained. “He owned a farm before he died where he worked hard, until there was a very bad drought and hard work wasn’t enough anymore. My grandfather often said that people called his brother evil because he did some bad things to feed his wife and children, and some of it really was pretty awful I guess. But nobody ever called evil the magistrate that wanted to force him to pay his taxes instead of buying food. My great-uncle was executed for his crimes and everyone said he’d always been evil and vicious even though they used to praise him as a good man before, but the magistrate got a promotion for making sure taxes were still paid and he got called virtuous. And that’s… I don’t know, I feel there’s something not right in that, you know?”

Nie Huaisang nodded, his eyes fixed on the grass knot that Su She wouldn't stop twisting between his fingers.

His older self had said that this Xue Yang he had to kill was an orphan, and a thief of some sort even though he was just ten.

It would be harder to be virtuous and noble for someone who didn’t have anyone to turn to. Nie Huaisang had his whole family behind him, all the education anyone could have, he knew about ethics and rules, and he still found it hard sometimes to make the right choices. He was too lazy and selfish to ever be really good, and apparently he wasn’t going to improve with age. So how could a child on his own, without books or wise elders, learn to be a good person, especially if like Nie Huaisang they’d been given a bad personality?

“Ok, I have another question.”

Su She sighed, and threw away his grass knot.

“Is it a weird one again?”

Nie Huaisang grimaced.

“Yeah, that one is pretty weird,” he admitted. “So, imagine there’s a very evil person. The most evil you can think of, but you don’t actually know them, it’s just that someone told you that person is very evil. And, for some reason, you’re given a chance to go back to when they were a little kid, and that person who told you this other guy is evil also tells you that you should take the chance and kill the evil person while he’s a kid to save other people. Would you do it, or would you try to… I don’t know, maybe try to make that kid grow up around better people so maybe he doesn’t turn out so bad?”

“Those questions are getting really specific.”

“Just answer. Do you think it’d be right to kill that kid?”

Su She fell silent for a moment.

“Do I trust the person who told me the kid will be evil later?”

Nie Huaisang considered that question.

“Yeah. I guess for the sake of the argument, you trust that person,” he said, even though he wasn’t quite sure how much he did trust his older self.

“And has the kid done anything evil yet?”

“No, but he’s done bad things. Maybe he stole some stuff. But also, he’s an orphan, you know?”

Su She sat up and gave his friend a sharp look.

“Really specific again. I guess… I guess it’d be wrong to kill him though. I mean, it’s like you said, why not try to put him in a better place instead? If he’s just a kid, and he hasn’t done anything bad yet… I don’t think it’s really fair to punish someone for something they haven’t even done yet.”

“Right? I think so too. People should get a chance before they’re punished. They’ve got to have a chance to learn!”

Su She nodded, but look more and more suspicious.

“So, is this all about someone in particular, or…”

“I’m just wondering stuff,” Nie Huaisang quickly said. The truth was too weird for anyone to ever believe, even if he tried to tell someone. Su She would just think he was crazy. Maybe he was, anyway. “I’ve got to think about something during boring lessons, right? I mean, don’t you start thinking about weird stuff too?”

“Sometimes I think about leaving the Cloud Recesses and creating my own sect when I’m bored,” Su She replied.

Nie Huaisang sat up, a grin on his face.

“Really? What would it be like?”

“Like Gusu Lan, but better,” Su She retorted with a smug smile. “And I’d get to sleep half a shichen later in the morning. You’re welcome to join us if you’d like, since you know how to play the guqin now. You can be my right hand man.”

Nie Huaisang’s grin only grew larger. It sounded like a delightful idea, and he eagerly dropped all his earlier thoughts about ethics and morality to instead make Su She talk about the sect of his dreams, until it was time for dinner.

That had to have been Lan Qiren’s most boring lecture to date. Quite the accomplishment, Nie Huaisang thought. Another accomplishment, and one far more impressive, was the fact that he’d managed to stay awake through all of it. It was really hard lately to pay attention, especially now that he didn’t need to. His grades during tests had been so consistently low that he couldn’t have passed even if he tried, so he really should have been allowed to skip those last few lessons and go have fun somewhere. He was going to hear all that stuff again in a year, wasn’t he?

If he hadn’t feared the Lans’ punishment methods, Nie Huaisang would have skipped all these stupid classes and ran off to Gusu for some fun.

If he hadn’t feared his brother’s wrath, he would also have stopped bothering with homework. But Lan Xichen had hinted to him, not unwisely, that Nie Mingjue might be a little less angry if he could be shown proof that his brother had really tried to learn. And considering the stunt Nie Huaisang was thinking of pulling with Xue Yang…

So, Nie Huaisang had stayed awake in class, and he’d been handed back some previous homework with a grade so high he’d actually asked Lan Qiren if there hadn’t been a mistake. Lan Qiren had told him that if the grade didn’t please him, it was always possible to lower it, so Nie Huaisang had kept his mouth shut after that.

The rest of the lesson had passed surprisingly fast after that, and soon enough Nie Huaisang was free again, with a whole afternoon ahead of him. He had new homework to deal with, sure, and it was something that would be graded again, but that didn’t feel urgent. Sadly, Su She had already warned that he wouldn’t be free to hang out that day, due to being allowed to go on a Night Hunt with some other Lan juniors, something he’d been very excited about. That meant Nie Huaisang would have to stay on his own, or go bother Lan Xichen.

The second option felt surprisingly compelling, even though they’d already see each other in three days for his music lesson. Lan Xichen was sure to praise him for his good grade after all, and Nie Huaisang quite enjoyed being praised, as he’d discovered. If more people praised him, he might start feeling like doing something to deserve it.

Nie Huaisang had just decided he’d try to see if Lan Xichen had time for him when Jin Zixun grabbed him by the elbow and started pulling him away from everyone else.

"How come you had a good grade on that essay?" Jin Zixun asked with unwarranted suspicion.

Nie Huaisang, who had briefly wondered if he was going to get punched again and was getting ready to escape, relaxed and allowed the other boy to drag him away.

"I'm actually very smart, thanks."

"You're only smart on homework and never on quizzes," Jin Zixun retorted. "Is your merchant friend helping you?"

That earned him a light kick to the shin, which he didn’t appear to feel.

"Don’t call him that!” Nie Huaisang warned. “And, no, he's said he doesn't want to think about learning when we hang out."

"Then it's Lan gongzi who does your homework for you."

That hit a little too close. Stung in his pride, Nie Huaisang’s freed himself from Jin Zixun’s grip and stopped walking, arms crossed on his chest.

"He doesn't! He just corrects my drafts! And lately most of what's in my essays is all my own, actually! I only fail in quizzes because I panic and because I don't have enough time."

It was something he’d realised during his music lessons with Lan Xichen, actually. Nie Huaisang needed to do things at his own speed, or else he couldn’t do things at all. It wasn’t a problem with Lan Xichen who allowed him to take breaks and even have a snack if he struggled too much to focus, but Lan Qiren and the other teachers hadn’t taken it too well when he’d tried to eat candies during quizzes, or when he started doodling during an exam because it helped him focus. It also fell into deaf ears when he pleaded to be given a little more time when, by some random chance, he actually did know the answer to a question and had so much to say that the allotted time wasn’t enough.

By comparison, homework was easy. Especially when Lan Xichen allowed him to come into his room and work there while he dealt with his own work. The company of a studious person really helped.

"Fine,” Jin Zixun said, grabbing his arm again. “Then you're going to help me with my essays. I’m just barely passing and if I don't get a good grade on the last set of homework, old man Lan is going to make me come back next year."

Jin Zixun started pulling again, but Nie Huaisang resisted this time.

"Why should I help you?"

"Because your grades are so bad you're sure to be sent back next year, and then we'd be stuck together again."

"I need to think. I don't care that much about being stuck with you. You're not the worst person I know."

"I'm… not?" Jin Zixun asked, sounding so shocked that Nie Huaisang snorted.

"Not even close to it," Nie Huaisang assured him, thinking of his future self. With that point of comparison, a lot of people had become almost agreeable to him.

"Oh. I'm not sure I have another argument in my favour," Jin Zixun admitted. "Usually that one is enough."

Nie Huaisang snorted again. He could imagine that a lot of people would do whatever Jin Zixun asked of them, just so he’d stop talking to them for a little while. He was, after all, a complete prick, without skill or above average good looks to compensate. Still, Nie Huaisang felt a little sorry for him.

Besides, he was convinced that his future self would hate to see him waste time being nice to someone whom he didn’t deem useful, and that really sealed the deal.

"Okay I'll help,” he sighed, as if conceding to something that cost him a lot, when in truth he didn’t mind that much. “But only because I'm sorry for you."

"Hey!"

"And I'm just helping,” Nie Huaisang warned. “You're still doing the actual work.”

“You’re just lazy,” Jin Zixun complained, pulling again on Nie Huaisang’s arm who, this time, willingly started to follow him toward the cabin where the Jin disciples stayed.

“I sure am,” Nie Huaisang agreed with a bright smile. “And I’m also thirsty, so let’s have tea while you work!”

Jin Zixun complained and grumbled and called him spoiled, but still did serve him what had to be the best tea he had on hand as they worked together.

A loud, discordant rang through the otherwise silent room until Nie Huaisang put down his hands on the guqin’s strings to silence it. His eyes prickled with tears yet unspilled. It was a simple enough melody, and he’d worked on it all week, wanting to surprise Lan Xichen with his progress by playing for him something they hadn't worked on together. Even the other Nie disciples, who fluctuated between indifference and annoyance at his new obsession with music, had praised him for playing it so well the night before.

But now he was there, in Lan Xichen’s room, trying to actually play that damn melody, and his fingers just refused to obey him.

“Give me another chance,” he begged, quickly pressing the back of his hand to one eye, just to make sure he hadn’t actually started crying. “I swear I can play it! I worked so hard on it, I’ll show you!”

“If you say you can play it, I believe you,” Lan Xichen replied. “You’ve had a rough day, it’s normal to be affected. Let’s put away the guqin for now and have some tea instead. It’ll do you good.”

When Lan Xichen got up and turned around to go boil water, Nie Huaisang felt a few tears of frustration fall on his cheek which he quickly wiped away. It was stupid, and it wasn’t fair, and he hated that things could impact him life that.

“It’s not like I thought I had any chance of passing anyway,” he hissed, hands clenching into fists. “I knew I was going to fail, it’s stupid that I’m upset about this!”

“Knowing something and actually experiencing it aren’t the same,” Lan Xichen replied. “It’s normal to be upset, Huaisang.”

Nie Huaisang shrugged, and wiped another tear. What did Lan Xichen know about failing anyway? He was always stupidly perfect, always did everything well, a favourite of every teacher, admired by all their peers, far more handsome than a boy of eighteen had any right to be, with a cultivation level that only Nie Mingjue, a freak of nature, could surpass. It was easy for Lan Xichen to say being upset was normal, when he’d probably never failed anything in his entire life.

By the time Lan Xichen returned to the table with a teapot and two glasses, Nie Huaisang was sulking, though thankfully he was too angry at himself to cry anymore. Lan Xichen took one look at him and went to fetch something else. He carefully put a little wooden box in front of Nie Huaisang, then started pouring tea for both of them.

“Take one,” Lan Xichen encouraged, nodding toward the box. “Take as many as you like, in fact. Just don’t tell anyone about them. I’m not supposed to have those.”

Intrigued, Nie Huaisang opened the box and discovered an array of cheap candies, which made Nie Huaisang grin against his will.

“What happened to the rules about avoiding unhealthy foods?”

“Wangji would have a fit,” Lan Xichen sighed, eyes glancing toward the door, as if just by mentioning his name, Lan Wangji might appear out of thin air to scold them. “But I know I can trust you to keep the secret.”

“No choice, you’ve made me an accomplice,” Nie Huaisang replied, grabbing one piece of candy. It was disgustingly sweet, almost making his jaw ache.

So he reached for another, his fingers briefly brushing against Lan Xichen who’d done the same. Nie Huaisang quickly removed his hand, startled at the sensation of warm skin.

“Lan gongzi, what if you adopted me as your new little brother?” Nie Huaisang suggested to try and pretend he hadn't had such a strong reaction just from an accidental touch. “I promise to be a very good didi. I will never get upset at you for wanting to have a little fun sometimes, and I’ll never denounce you to Lan Qiren either. And you will be my nice Lan-gege… ah ! Better yet, you'll be Xichen-ge! Always kind and patient, and you won’t mind at all that I’m bad at everything because I’m very sweet and funny.”

“A tempting offer,” Lan Xichen replied with an odd smile. “Wangji certainly never calls me ‘ge’ because he finds it too informal, whereas I think I quite like it, so I might adopt you just for that. But alas, Mingjue-xiong would be heartbroken if I stole his beloved brother from him, and so I must decline.”

Nie Huaisang took a sip of tea and sighed deeply.

“I don’t think he’ll mind at all. As it is, he might just disown me himself anyway.”

"Your brother will understand," Lan Xichen replied while taking another candy. "He'll be angry at first, but it won't last. If it worries you so much, I can write to him and tell him how hard you've been working. It's a shame homework doesn't count more toward passing, or I do think you'd be graduating."

Nie Huaisang shrugged. It was always like that: if he was good at something, it was always something which didn't matter. Even being skilled at music… what good was that to anyone, in the end?

"What if he doesn't forgive me though?"

"He will," Lan Xichen replied with confidence. "You are his precious little brother, I don't think he could ever stay mad at you very long."

Nie Huaisang thought of his older self, so convinced that Nie Mingjue despised him, and sighed.

"Maybe someday he'll get tired of forgiving me. Maybe someday I'll… maybe someday I'll do something that's too much," he muttered, thinking of his plan regarding Xue Yang. "I'll go too far, and then he'll hate me. And if he hates me, I'll…"

"Your brother loves you," Lan Xichen said. "He loves you as much as you love him. I don't think there's anything in the world that could change that."

That sounded like a challenge. As it happened, Nie Huaisang had given that topic a lot of thought lately, and he'd reached a conclusion.

"I can think of at least two things I could do that would make him hate me," he announced.

"Is that so?" Lan Xichen asked with a smile, as if he really believed such a thing to be impossible.

That gave Nie Huaisang some comfort. Lan Xichen was Nie Mingjue's best friend in the world, as close to him as he was to Su She. Lan Xichen had to know Nie Mingjue better than anyone else did, even if things were fated to start going bad between them someday.

"I could betray him to Wen Ruohan," Nie Huaisang said. "He'd never forgive that."

Lan Xichen took a sip of tea and nodded.

"Not if you did it on purpose, no. But I also think it isn't in your nature to willingly side with his enemies, and he would forgive you if you were tricked into it."

"Xichen-ge has a very high opinion of me, I feel undeserving."

"I'm only stating the truth. Now, what's the other thing you think Mingjue-xiong wouldn't forgive?"

"Marrying into Lanling Jin."

Lan Xichen chortled.

A real, honest to god, ugly laugh. He tried to hide it under a cough, but it was too late, Nie Huaisang had heard it and it delighted him. So even the ever perfect first jade of Gusu Lan could laugh like that!

"Well? What do you think of that one?"

"I think you're right this time," Lan Xichen agreed, still coughing. "It might be too much for him. In fact, I'll even say you'd deserve it."

"What? Xichen-ge, how cruel!" Nie Huaisang lamented, one hand over his heart. "Maybe I’ve found my one true love, and…”

“So all Jin Zixun had to do was break your nose and now you want to marry him?”

“Oh that’s pushing the joke too far,” Nie Huaisang said with a grimace, quickly bringing one hand to his nose, following the bone with one finger to try and feel the break. “He’s not my type at all, and anyway we’re both brats, it wouldn’t work out at all. Still, in theory, if I were to marry into Lanling Jin…”

Lan Xichen only smiled more widely.

“Would you, though?”

“Why not? There’s got to be a few that are decent. I mean, Zixun is occasionally almost tolerable, he can’t be the only one.”

“Oh, certainly there are some very fine people in that sect. I was talking more about the fact that you’d have to wear yellow for the rest of your life. Is that really something you could put up with?”

Thinking of the way those Jin disciples dressed, Nie Huaisang gasped and pressed both hands to his mouth to silence a cry of horror.

“That’s a good point! It’s not even a nice shade of yellow, either!" he cried out, trying to picture himself wearing it. It would be awful, he quickly decided. "I think it would wash out my complexion and make me look sickly. Maybe if it were a touch closer to brown, or even better a bit greenish, maybe I could consider it, but I really can’t marry into a sect that favours such a dreadful colour. I guess I’ll… why are you smiling?”

Lan Xichen, once more hiding his face behind his sleeve, turned away as if it might help dissimulate his grin.

“Because you are quite funny," he chuckled. "I don’t think anyone else would consider it a deal-breaker for marriage that they don’t like another sect’s colour.”

“Easy for you to say, Xichen-ge, you’d look good in any hue! Some of us have to be careful!”

Lan Xichen lowered his hand, his face suddenly serious once more except for a certain glint in his eyes.

“Huaisang, you really sell yourself short sometimes. I think you’d look quite good in any colour,” he eagerly said, before breaking into a fit of giggles as he added: “Any colour except Jin yellow, that is.”

It wasn’t even that funny, Nie Huaisang thought as he started laughing too. But Lan Xichen’s unexpected hilarity was too contagious to be resisted, and he’d been feeling down all day, so he just went for it and enjoyed the moment. It took them ages to ever calm down.

When they did though, Lan Xichen suggested that perhaps Nie Huaisang might try again to play that song he’d practiced.

This time, he played it perfectly, better even than he’d ever done before.

#nie huaisang #lan xichen #su she #jin zixun #xisang #some very light flirting is starting to happen at long last!#mo dao zu shi #mdzs #jau writes #double time travel

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hyenahunt · 3 years ago

Text

Werewolf - 6

Writer: Nishioka Maiko

Season: Summer

Proofreading: 310mc (JP)

Translation: Bella & hyenahunt

Hiyori: This is truly worthy of some super sleuthing! As the great detective that I am, you should just leave it to me, Natsume-kun!

[Location: Seisou Hall Common Room]

Hiyori: Jun-kun! Aren't you so glad we got to see that just now?

Jun: You mean the cat sittin' all cozily out in the courtyard, right? Yeah.

It was real cute... though it ran away when I tried to pet it. Wonder if it got lost and wandered in?

Hiyori: If it was a lost cat I would have loved to welcome it into my home...

But I can't do something as irresponsible as that, what with all the unpredictable travelling we do for work.

And besides, we can't have our Bloody Mary getting jealous, of course!

Natsume: ......

Hiyori: Hm? If it isn't Natsume-kun! Right as I was thinking I could feel some despair in the air!

Jun: Oh, you're right. Heya~

Hiyori: What's the matter? You shouldn’t be spreading gloomy vibes all over the place, you know? They'll just infect everyone around you, you see.

And I was in such a good mood, too! What a foul weather!

Natsume: I’m in an extremely bad mood right NOW. Leave me ALONE.

Jun: Hmm. Well then, wanna play some game again? Pick something fun and maybe your mood'll clear up a bit, whether you win or lose.

If you'd like, I can let you win, too? You could even pick something you're a pro at if you want — wouldn't bother me.

Natsume: I'm not in the MOOD. I won't feel like playing games for as long as I have all these worries weighing on my MIND, you KNOW.

Hiyori: Oh, that’s no good now, is it? If there's something troubling you, you should come have a heart-to-heart with me! How fortunate you are, to be blessed with advice from me of all people ☆

Natsume: ...Are you joKING? No way. You're not the least bit reliaBLE.

I don't approve of you inserting yourself into other people's affairs in the first PLACE. We call that "meddling," you KNOW?

Hiyori: Heheh. Tweak the meaning slightly and even meddling can turn right into care!

Everyone would be so much happier if they'd look instead at the bright side of life ♪

Not to mention, I'm always the one who soothes Jun-kun's woes. So knowing that, you should just kick back, relax, and tell me everything!

Jun: You're usually the source of my woes to begin with, Ohii-san.

Hiyori: Feeling bashful, are we, Jun-kun? You're so cute when you are ☆

Jun: Bashful's the last thing I am, actually....

Natsume: HonestLY. I don't understand how you can stay so needlessly optimisTIC, Tomoe-senpai.

Hiyori: Yes, yes. You see, this is what you'd call an adult's composure. I'm on a different level entirely when it comes to experience — after all, I'm basically your senior in life!

Jun: Well, putting Ohii-san and his advice aside...

If you're at your wit's end over something, Sakasaki-san, it might help to ask around for opinions, y'know~?

In times like these, you could totally have some kinda breakthrough just by looking at it from a different angle.

Natsume: A breakTHROUGH…?

(It is true that asking Sora hasn't gotten me anyWHERE, and I don’t even have an inkling of what the problem is in the first plaCE. I'm well and truly STUMPED.

Hrmm… These two were with me when Sora started acting strangeLY, so perhaps they might know someTHING...)

But it literalLY, physically pains me to rely on the two of THEM...

Jun: Sakasaki-saaan? You kinda said that out loud, y'knooow~? Please keep stuff like that to yourself.

Natsume: I'm sooo sorRY. That was on purPOSE ♪

Jun: Man, both you and Ohii-san are such pleasant people, huh.

Natsume: But it's exactly as you SAY. I feel completely and utterly STUMPED.

You SEE, it's because of Sora that I'm so glooMY.

We met him in the kitchen some time ago, RIGHT?

Jun: Yeah. We did, now that you mention it~

Natsume: Since THEN, Sora's been acting oddLY. He's been aloof for some reaSON.

As you might exPECT, it's worrying ME. He ran away in the blink of an eye when I went to visit his room just NOW.

Hiyori: Hmm~ Are you sure it's not because of you, Natsume-kun?

Like maybe you said or did something to upset him. That's my deduction, anyway!

Natsume: I'm sure it isN'T. Sora only acts like this at the dorms; he's his usual self when we're doing WORK.

He's not the kind of person who does a total 180 between his public and private life eiTHER.

If I'd really done or said something to HIM, then it'd be strange for his attitude to change only based on where we ARE.

Jun: Mmm... It does sound like a real mystery...

We're not gonna find any answers standing around thinking about it, so why not just straight-up ask Harukawa-kun why he ran away that time?

Natsume: Absolutely NOT.

Jun: You're practically pulling your hair out over this, so why not? Isn't hearing it straight from him the quickest way to get a guaranteed answer?

Natsume: I certainly could force him to tell me exactly what's going ON...

But that wouldn't be FAIR. Sora doesn't belong to ME. He's his own perSON.

If he doesn't want to talk to ME, then I'm not going to corner HIM.

Hiyori: Ah-ha~ ♪ I can see right through you. You're trying to put up a front, aren't you! You don't want to let your adoring junior see you looking lame in the slightest, correct?

Natsume: God, you're so annoYING...

AnyWAY, that's THAT. If Sora's decided he's not going to talk to me about IT, I'm not going to make him, BUT...

If I could just figure out what's going ON, then I might be able to do something about IT.

You two saw him that day too, didn't YOU? Did you notice anything OFF? Anything's better than noTHING… I'm not expecting that much from you, anYWAY.

Jun: Easier said than done.... Nothing really happened that day, right? I can't think of anything that could've been—

Hiyori: Heh heh heh.... Interesting.... Reaaally interesting!

Natsume: What? Did you figure something OUT, Tomoe-senpai?

Hiyori: Nope, not in the slightest! But I do believe Sora-kun's hiding some sort of important secret!

Hiyori: This is truly worthy of some super sleuthing! As the great detective that I am, you should just leave it to me, Natsume-kun!

In the name of my dear old grandfather, I'll solve this mystery for everyone! After all, only a single truth prevails ♪ [1]

Natsume: ...Just what is he so obsessed with this TIME?

Jun: The detective mangas I've been lending him, I'm guessing?

Ohii-san, I'm just saying but you got things a little wrong, y'know?

Natsume: (Sigh) I feel like reaching back into the past and punching myself for even trying to talk with THEM...

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Translation Notes:

[1]: Hiyori references two famous detective manga series in this line — the first is a reference to The Kindaichi Case Files, where the main character's catchphrase is "In the name of my grandpa!". The second is from Detective Conan, with "One truth prevails!". In both cases, he gets them slightly incorrect, hence Jun's comment: お爺さま instead of じっちゃん (a more formal way of saying grandfather), and 真相 instead of 真実 (both meaning truth but pronounced differently)

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#hiyori tomoe #jun sazanami #natsume sakasaki #enstars #ensemble stars #enstars translation #s: werewolf #era: !!#type: scout #status: complete #hyenahunttl

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ihaveafandom-problem554 · 3 years ago

Note

i love your works oh my god, the wait was so worth it. thank you for doing my requests!! they all turn out great :D despite my username, I’m glad I made an account just so that I could request more of your spider bro content.

okay so uh I’m sorry if I’m requesting this a bit early since you only posted your latest spider bro today but after reading it, a sudden wave of problems and curiosity hit me so I thought:

‘yo aren’t the village gonna question why spider bro and rui only come around during sunset to night time sooner or later? are they gonna make up some excuse about them having some condition where if they stay in the sun for just a little bit they get really bad sunburn?? like “yeah so our parents died because they went out in the sun for too long so newbie demon slayers noticed this and thought they were demons in disguise and killed them, haha runs in the family amiright” idk ?? (sorry that’s a weird death) I like to imagine they pretend to be albino so that they can have an excuse in case someone ever asks them or say that they have jobs in the day time to support each other so they just visit around night time.

but honestly, I think the village would be a little sus of them but then they’ll be like “ehh they can’t be demons, they would’ve ate us already! plus they’re just so kind!!” so yeah.. (unless the village doesn’t really know about demons, then you can just ignore this)

okay so imma just start putting my ideas and prompt in here yeahh ..

so what I imagine is that the village knows about demons, but most just chalk it up as some sort of folklore to keep kids from wondering at night by themselves. however some (mostly the elders) claim to actually experience demon attacks so despite practically everyone living these two, they have their eyes on them just a bit..

the elders there would usually gather some kids and tell stories about demons roaming the night hunting for humans, and there would be people who would be as strong or stronger than the demons and slay them by cutting their heads off with a special blade- they say that there’s a whole organization dedicated for these specific people! and that those people who would sometimes come to the village with an odd uniform on are part of them.

one day while spider bro and rui visit the village, ashai drags them to where his grandfather would tell stories about demons and how the grandfather’s father were part of that organization and was called a “hashira” who mastered the sun breathing.

after that ashai would be like “that’s just gramps being all weird again with his whole demon slayer stuff, but it’s pretty interesting! it’s only a folklore though so you have nothing to be scared of. honestly, there’ll be times where I think you’re both demons or something because you guys act like you don’t know how to function as a human being sometimes, haha” and the spider bros would just be like “aha.. yeah..”

some of the elders start noticing that they only came around night, and unfortunately, not everyone is friendly. they kind of start interrogating them to the point where the other villagers would politely step in and tell them that they’re just kids with a condition that runs in their family (and rui becoming fed up then almost slashing them into ribbons). of course, a small portion of them don’t stop and are.. quite positive of it and would be a bit passive aggressive towards the two.

alright so I’ve come up with some ways it could go but I have no idea, you can decide which is better or somehow merge them together or mismatch and combine things,,, :D

1: obviously, the spider siblings can’t survive on human food. they’ll need human blood, the human food is just for when they get bored of eating humans for a bit. but.. how are they gonna get some? they can’t eat the village, and as much as they found the elders annoying they couldn’t since 1, they were pretty much right about them, and 2, if they were to eat the elders/anyone who found them suspicious even more people would start growing sus of them.

maybe.. the demon slayers that came to the village every now and then?

(name) would usually just use his spiders and take at least a cup (or two if rui’s feeling hungry) of their blood and bandage them up to go.

it lasted for a few weeks, so he thought he could control it.

him and rui did their best to try and suppress the urge, they really did.

they vowed themselves to not eat innocent people after meeting the friendly village.

but whenever a demon slayer would come to the village and whenever they took one or two cups of their blood, the more they craved just devouring them right there and then.

it was true that the two had a dislike for demon slayers, but they can’t say that most of them aren’t innocent. (I mean.. they kind of aren’t too)

they can’t do that.

but…

a few more cups won’t hurt, right?

a few days pass, and the butterfly mansion has been getting more and more demon slayers, most of them were from dangerously high blood loss, just enough for them to live and walk.. kind of.

and they all came from near the mountain.

but.. (I’m assuming this is after the fight between tanjiro and rui, but instead rui got away before tomioka could show up) didn’t tomioka, shinobu, and a few other demon slayers slay all of the demons there? unless there are a few hiding.. however they claim to not have entered the mountain, and instead went straight to a nearby village. they also claim to not have remembered anything about getting their blood taken, just waking up on a floor near the village with their arm bandaged up (it always happened at night time, too).

two or more days pass before they send some demon slayers to come investigate.

these demon slayers of course being tanjiro, inosuke, and zenitsu (plus nezuko).

when they arrived, it had been around 5 to 6, just before the spider siblings came to visit.

as they entered, tanjiro could smell a very faint scent of a demon almost everywhere (mainly around the shops and the people)- so faint that he could’ve missed it if he wasn’t searching for demons right now.

but before he could try to track it down, many young children from the village ran up to them and started excitedly asking about their uniform and their swords.

“are you guys demon slayers?”

“are grandpa’s weird demon stories are true?”

“can I touch the sword???”

it was no secret that they stood out from the crowd, and the villagers usually didn’t really question it because each demon slayer looked pretty normal and bland.

tanjiro smiled remembering his younger siblings all getting ready to eat and play during spring time.

zenitsu noticed tanjiro being confused and told them that demon slayers weren’t very well known, but it seems like it’s a folklore from around here.

and inosuke, of course was about taken aback by all of these mini humans running around them and was about to fight them until tanjiro reassured him.

ashai ran towards them thinking that rui and (name) was here a bit earlier than usual but was a bit disappointed when he got closer to clearly see their faces (and a boar head).

I TOLD MYSELF I SHOULD'VE ADDED A SCENE WHERE OLDER SPIDER BROTHER EXPLAINS TO ASHAI THAT HE GETS REALLY BAD SUNBURN BUT MY LAZY ASS SAID NO. ACTUALLY FUCK ME WHY AM I SO LAZY!?

Anyway let's do this..

Ok so the Village are familiar with demons and demon slayers but they take it as a Folklore since the grandparents keep mentioning it to the kids.

And before [Name] brung Rui, Ashai did ask him why he only came when the sunsets. And [Name] told him he was really sensitive to the sunlight, like, to the point it would actually burn him really bad.

And Ashai looked at him saying, "You could've just said you get really bad sunburn.."

And yes, his mom did smack him for saying that.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Hi Ashai! You seem happy today."

"[Name]! Rui!" Ashai called out, running towards the two boys. Rui immediately pouted when he noticed the voice calling up to them wasn't one of the kind ladies trying to offer him food. Meanwhile, [Name] smiled at the boy's presence and walked faster towards Ashai.

"Yeah! I want to bring you to my grandfather-”

“Why?- Wait was is that..” Rui interrupted causing Ashai to stop walking and face Rui. “You did not just ask what a grandfather is.”

“I did. Now I want an answer.” Rui demanded his facial expression not changing a bit. Ashai sighed before explaining what a grandfather was, later explaining what a grandmother was, then explaining what a great grandfather and grandmother was.

Before Rui could ask anymore questions about people’s parents, Ashai changed the subject to the reason why he wanted to take them to his grandfather.

‘Demon slayers’ was the first thing that came out of Ashai’s mouth and it made the two spider sibling’s heart drop. Rui’s heart dropped even deeper once he heard the word ‘Hashira’. It was almost impossible to hide the fact that it bothered him greatly.

Ashai turned around to race the two, and met their petrified expressions. Thinking they were terrified about the demon folklore, he immediately stopped talking and cupped [Name]'s face to try and reassure him.

"Oh no don't worry! It's just some dumb folklore, there's nothing to worry about! The demons aren’t real, it’s just some dumb story to keep the little ones from going outside at night. Its just gramps being all weird again with his whole demon slayer stuff, but it’s pretty interesting! Again, it’s only a folklore though so you have nothing to be scared of.” Ashai says letting go of [Name]’s face and opens the door for the two siblings to walk through. “Honestly, there’ll be times where I think you’re both demons or something because you guys act like you don’t know how to function as a human being sometimes, haha” Ashai joked, hoping to lighten the mood a bit

[Name] nervously laughed back while Rui just glared.

As the 3 boys walked inside the minka, [Name] noticed no one else was there except for the old man and Madam Yui. Not only that, but there was some strange aura in the air, as if he wasn’t welcome here. Turning over to Rui, [Name] can see his uneasy expression as well. But before he got the chance to say anything, Yui spoke aloud.

“Oh! sorry boys grandpa needs to rest, I’m sure if you come back later he’ll tell you one of his stories.”

A quiet sigh of relief was emitted from Rui. “Aww, that sucks I really wanted to you guys to here some of his stories.” Ashai pouted slightly.

“Don’t worry, he’ll be awake soon.. Ashai, go over to the bakery and get the box wrapped in blue, its for your grandfather, don’t take to long ok?”

“Ok.. [Name]! Come with me-”

“No, I need him for something, just go over to the bakery real quick, get the box and come back.”

“But-”

“Nothing sweetie.. Hi Rui” Yui smiled, hugging the demon child who had just ran up to her. “How are you baby? Did you eat the food I sent you home with?”

“Go young man.”

Knowing he couldn’t argue any further, Ashai reluctantly went over to the bakery without [Name]. “That boy is obsessed with you, isn’t he?” Madam Yui joked. Unfortunately for [Name], he was too busy staring at the door Ashai just went through to hear what Yui said, causing him to answer a couple seconds late. “H-huh”

“The tempura and Sushi? Yeah we finished it.”

“Oh, you must still be hungry.. [Name] can you close all the blinds and sweep the floor?”

“Of course!”

“Thank you dear, I’ll be in the kitchen with your brother if you need me” Yui said, walking into the kitchen with Rui.

[Name] got straight to work, closing the blinds and sweeping isn’t anything hard...But the strange aura he felt before when he first entered, intensified. It almost felt like the air gotten thicker as well.

As [Name] swept closer to the sleeping grandfather, he noticed something right next to him. Taking a closer look, [Name]'s eyes at the sight of the samurai sword. Why does it look bigger than the usual than the swords I’ve seen.

After staring at the sword for a bit, [Name] finally looked away from the sword to finish sweeping.

“I kill your kind with this exact sword”

...

“Is that what you tell the demons before you kill them?” [Name] questions, trying his best not to show the slightest amount of fear in his voice. “Every. single. one.” [Name] nodded, but refused to face the owner of the voice and the larger than normal sword. “Your kind disgusts me. Killing innocent souls just for your selfish needs.”

“I don’t know what you mean by ‘Your kind’ sir-”

“Demons.” He spat. “I mean Demons.” [Name] only nodded, no words, justs movements. Speaking of movements, the old man began to get up and slowly move closer to [Name]. Shit, what do I do now?

After hearing Ashai say that his grandfather was a Hashira, [Name] knew that his age didn’t affect the way he moved. The retired hashira can block his way to the door in the matter of seconds. He didn’t want to question how fast he was compared to a sun-breathing hashira. So he put the broom down and finally face the old man who was ten feet away from him. “Who many demons did you ki-”

“You may have fooled everyone in this village with your little story. But I’m not naive.” The sun breathing hashira was now walking towards [Name]. [Name] wasted no time walking towards the kitchen, he could probably notify madam Yui..

If it wasn’t for the sun breather grabbing [Name] by the neck. "Like I said before... your kind disgust me. And don't get me started on your excuse of a leader 'Muzan kibutsuji' (I hate his last name. I've spent about five minutes trying to figure out if the first half was 'kitbust' or 'kibust'). You don't happen to have any information on him do you?" With every word, the hashira tighten his grip on [Name]'s neck. Making it harder and harder for [Name] to breathe. "And don't worry about him finding you after you tell me, I'll kill you the second I get the information I need."

"A-and...wh..if...don't..?" [Name] was barely audible and on the verge of blacking out with the insane grip on his neck. He could taste own blood at this point, but he wasn't concerned about the blood trickling out of his mouth, he was more concerned about how no one was here to save him. Madam Yui told Ashai not to take long, and the bakery isn't far away from here. So what the hell?

Without waiting another second, [Name] unleashed a tiny spider to go and kill the hashira. Sure he was Ashai's grandpa but, it was either this old man or him.

"Have nothing to say? Well that's disappointing.." [Name] could feel his eyes threatening to shut as he Choked on his own blood. "P-plea....sto..p" he tried to plead. "If it wasn't for you disgusting demons.. my wife would've still been alive. I swear, I will defeat your leader, and kill every single one of you good for nothing demons-"

"GRANDPA NO HE ISN'T A DEMON! LET HIM GO" Ashai yelled, alerting Madam Yui who came rushing out of the Kitchen, Rui not to far behind. "Put him down Grandpa! He isn't a demon!" Ashai pleaded, gripping onto his grandfather's hamari, tears threathing to spill from his eyes. "PLEASE STOP YOUR HURTING HIM!"

"Oh Ashai, this isn't what you call a friend. This is a human eating demon, that killed your- OW DAMMIT" The hashira yelled in pain, thus letting go of [Name].

Once [Name] hit the floor, he immediately sucked in as much air as he could before choking again.

"[NAME] are you ok?!" Ashai called, rushing over to help [Name]. Rui would've done the same if it wasn't for Yui protectively holding on to him.

"When was the last time you took your medicine? You almost killed him! He's only a child" Yui quickly scolded the elder. " Oh sweetheart.. that kick was so powerful it almost broke my arm. You should-"

"I'm not and won't become a demon slayer. Go back to your room and take your medicine. You almost killed him!"

"He isn't a kid. That thing is a demon.. And so is the smaller one your holding."

"They aren't demons-"

"They how come they only come out when the sun goes down?" To that Madam Yui didn't have an answer. She never really thought about why they did come when the sun isn't out. Thankfully Ashai spoke up just before the elder could prove his point. "Their both sensitive to sun the sunlight. Both their parents died because of that."

Madam Yui held Rui even tighter as she looked back at the elder. "Ashai go take [Name] to Ms. Reiki." She demanded. Without thinking Ashai immediately picked up [Name] and proceeded to carry him to whoever Ms. Reiki was.

"I know you wanna check on [Name], Rui, don't worry we'll go there in a minute." Yui reassures, while cupping Rui's left cheek. "Yui, your not this naive."

"You should be ashamed of yourself, hurting a defenseless child-"

"He isn't a child.. You know that demons basically have a unlimited lifespan? That 'kid' is most likely 40 years old"

"Your just delusional, you haven't taken your medicine all day have you?"

"I do not need that Goddamn Medi...cine.. What the hell are you staring at?!" The elder quickly spat at the small spider boy who stared at the two adults.

"Nothing.. I didn't know older people quarreled.. I thought only children quarreled." Rui said with pure innocence. "I thought when hu- people got older they learned how to settle their arguments maturely, rather than idiotic children that need someone superior than them to settle it for them"

The two adults stared at Rui, both with different intentions of what to do next. "Oh, Rui, It's-"

"Don't explain anything to that thing." The elder spat. Rui watched as the two adults argued with each other. For some strange reason Rui was invested slightly uncomfortable but couldn't help but listen to what they had to say.

Throughout this argument, Rui learned some new words..

...

"I'm so sorry about my Grandfather, [Name], my mom said he's been having some illusions lately.. I didn't expect it to get this worse." Ashai apologized for the 26th time. "Like... I said for 26th...time Ashai, its ok! I'm fine really.."

"I know but he choked you and called you a demon! Why are you so calm about it?! You could've died!"

".....But I didn't..So..Yay?..." [Name] jazzed-hand. Ashai just sighed in response.

"That's odd.." Ms. Reiki said to herself, but the boys were interested anyway. "What's is it Reiki-san?" Ashai asked, his voice full of concern. "You said your grandfather choked him right?..Oh nevermind it's probably nothing.." She dismisses. "How's your throat? Is it feeling sore?"

"Well-"

"Don't speak. Just nod or shake your head." Reiki quickly spoke. [Name] nodded slightly before smiling at Reiki. "Your welcome sweetie.. Oh! Yui, is everything.."

"Everything's ok.." The two boys turned their heads to face Yui, who had just walked in with a sleeping Rui. "[Name] I am terribly sorry for what occurred and your injuries."

"It's-"

"What did I say about speaking?"

Not wanting to know the punishment for disobeying a nurse, [Name] nodded again with a smile, hoping Madam Yui will see that he forgives her. Thankfully she understood and returned a smile. " [Name] you can go, just remember to take it easy on your throat and take the medication I gave you." [Name] obeyed and made note to throw out the medication, since it had no use to him.

Both Reiki and Madam Yui watched the [Name] walk out with his admirer, Ashai.

As they left, the two women looked at each other with worry some expressions. "How did it even happened?" Reiki asked immediately. "I'm not sure.." Yui answered in disappointment. "I was in the kitchen with Rui because he wanted a snack. Then all of a sudden I hear Ashai yelling something about a demon so I ran out to see him choking [Name]"

"Did he take his medicine? Or did he continue to rant about how he doesn't need it?"

"That exactly" Yui sighed. She looked down at the sleeping Rui she had in her hands. The only thing she could think about was how the situation would have happened if she didn't come out sooner.. Rui would've lost the only member of his family.. he would've been traumatized for the rest of his life.. "The nerve of him to call him a demon.." Yui spoke through her teeth in anger.

Taking a second to rid off any dark thoughts she turned back to Reiki. "I'm leaving now. I want the kids to eat something before they leave, have a nice night."

"Same to you as well"

...

"You need to eat a human"

"I'm aware of that.. But who am I going to eat?" [Name] questioned. It has passed a few weeks ever since the two spider siblings ate a human body. Sure, the human's food is tasty and gives them energy for a couple hours, but it doesn't give them the nutrients they need. Day by day they can feel their bodies growing weaker do to the lack of human blood in their system. [Name] could care less about his own health, he was more concerned about Rui and what he was gonna eat. Every couple minutes or so, he could here Rui's stomach growl from hunger.

It pained him to see Rui in this state. Yet he's been in this state for weeks now and [Name] still doesn't know what to do or who to eat.

"We can eat that old sun-breather" Rui suggested. [Name]'s eyes widen in response. "Or" Rui continued, "We can eat everyone else who called us a demon! We'll make them regret-"

"We can't do that.."[Name] sighed. [Name] knows that Rui's way smarter than this, but after weeks of being around humans and not being able to take a even a bite out of them, is bond to do something to the way he thinks.

"They've been accusing us for being demons, if they suddenly go missing, we would have a lot of suspicion towards us."

"If we can't eat any of the old people or anyone else at the village who can we eat?" Rui asked, completely annoyed. "It's already a problem that we can't go out during the day when the sun's out, so how can we- uhh... [Name] what- what are you doing?" Rui questioned as he watched [Name] create a small spider and send it out to go in the opposite direction towards the deeper part of the woods.

"[Name], What are you?- huh?" Rui stopped talking as he sees a demon slayer slowly walk towards him like a mindless zombie.

"You did so well sweetie~" [Name] cooed to his spider, gently petting the spiders head. "uhh.."

"mh? Oh! I heard footsteps coming while you were talking.. I don't think we can devour the body this time though.. they'll probably send in more demon slayers complaining about a demon."

Rui stared at the demon slayer who had no control over their body. It's right there in front of him, he has every right to devour the vulnerable human, but then at the same time he doesn't. Just because people don't know he's a bloodthirsty demon who needs human blood to survive.

"Cut the skin open, you can suck the blood off of that. Take as much as you want but don't take too much so they can't walk, ok?" [Name] said. "Wait what about you? You need to-"

"It's fine, you need it more than me, I'll just fine another-"

"No. Take some as well, we don't know the next time you'll get choked like that.. or be threaten with wisteria.. we might not be able to regenerate as fast as we used too. I won't take a lot.. A cup or two should be enough to last a week or so." Rui demanded. [Name] only nodded in response.

Rui examined the slayer standing in front of him, figuring out where to suck the blood out of. "Cut open wherever chubbiest and take some blood. I'll send out a couple of my spiders to grab some bandages so we can patch them up. Then we'll leave them here and continue with our day." [Name] said, already making bigger than normal sized spiders to send out to the village to steal some bandages.

"How often are we gonna do this?" Rui asked while using his threads make a 'X' formation around the slayers hips. "I guess every couple weeks? or when your feeling hungry..."

It was surprising how well they managed to control themselves for so long. After taking a little more than one cup of blood, they soon decided to reward themselves with another two cups. After being satisfied, they cleaned and bandaged the body. Later leaving it mindless on the ground waiting for sunrise to come and free it from it's curse.

The spider siblings decided to do this every week or two. Find a slayer, drain most of its blood, patch it up, and pretend like nothing happened. It was hard trying not to devour the human, but the managed. Sure they had to hold each other back every now an then but the really are trying..

Meanwhile the butterfly mansion was trying to solve the mystery of the barely walking slayers with bandaged arms, legs, neck, and or stomach with a dangerously high amount of blood loss.

"Shinobu! We got another one!" Aoi called from the door frame leading to the medical room. "And Yes! Its the same bandaging pattern!" Shinobu sighed, yet kept the smile that was always on her face. This is the 5th one this month, the last person was barely alive.. if this keeps going...

"Oh! Another one?" Kanae (Yes she's alive here, I really miss her) said walking into the same room as Shinobu. "Your back so soon?" Shinobu questioned. "Only for a bit... I do have to get going soon. But since it is still day, I thought I would be able to get some more information on why some of our people are coming back with a terrible amount of blood loss. You care to join me?" Kanae offered, signaling Shinobu to follow her. Without a doubt, Shinobu followed her sister to medical room Aoi was in.

...

"Wait, The mountain that's a couple miles from here?" Shinobu asked, interrupting the story the only stable slayer was telling. "Y-Yeah actually.." The slayer answered.

"That's odd.." Kanae remarked, putting her index finger to her on her chin. "Shinobu, didn't you and tomioka slayed all the demons near the mountain?"

"Yes. Indeed we did.. We even raided the shed near the mountain."

"Act-actually.." The slayer spoke up "I never went to the mountain.. I went straight to the village near the woods."

"Why go straight to the village?"

"I was going to ask the people there if they had experince any suspicious activity. But before I got to the village, I felt something bite me. That's when I passed out. I wasn't sure how long I was out for, but when I woke up.. I was all bandaged up."

"Sorry to interrupt" Aoi interrupted "But, did you ever did get the chance to go to the village?"

"uuh no." The slayer concluded.

" Why'd you asked that Aoi?" Kanae asked. "Oh I wanted to know where the bandages came from. Anyway I should get back to work." Aoi claimed as she quickly walked off.

Aww she want to contribute but got nervous.. Kanae smiled to herself before getting up with a small stretch.

"Well!" Kanae clapped. "We'll send a couple demon slayers to investigate the area... Aoi said the patients claimed that it happened at night correct?"

"Uhh Yeah.."

"Then it's settled we'll send slayers right away to the area.. please get as much rest as you can and stay healthy, we will get to work immediately. Thank you!" And with that Kanae signaled her sister to follow her once more before leaving.

"Are you going to ask any of the Hashira to help?" Shinobu asked. "Well no that's not who I had in mind.."

"Then who?"

...

"We could've got here earlier if SOMEONE DIDN'T MAKE US STOP FOR TEMPURA!" Yelled a very pissed Zenitsu. Inosuke paid no attention to Zenitsu and instead enjoyed the last bite of Tempura he had in his mouth underneath his mask.

"Well it's only 5:48 so we have plenty of time to investigate the area" Tanjiro said trying his best to cause not another fight between Zenitsu and Inosuke for the fifth time today.

Zenitsu sighed. "Well? Do you smell anything?"

"Oh um.." Tanjiro took a second to sniff the air.

The village smelled friendly. Happy kids, happy adults, happy pets, demons, baked goods, fresh food, healthy environment..

"Huh?" Tanjiro said quietly to himself. He took another sniff around, taking him about a minute to finally, fully grab the demon scent.

"It's very faint." He unintentionally reported to Zenitsu. "It's on almost everything..and everyone.."

"Wait.. on the people too?! Dose that mean it's hiding as a human!?" Zenitsu began to panic. "It seems like it... how else would the scent get on the people."

"Start tracking it down gompochiro!!" Inosuke demanded.

"Right I should-"

"Is that a real sword?" A little girl asked. "Oh uh- where did you-"

"Are you a demon slayer?"

"Are grandpa's weird stories true?"

"Why do you have a boar hat?"

"Can I touch the sword?"

"Can I wear the boar hat?"

"Is that a bird on your head?"

A whole bunch of little kids ran up to the three strange looking people and asked them all the questions that came to mind. Not giving them the chance to answer.

Tanjiro smiled at all the kids who surrounded them, they reminded him of his siblings when it was time to eat or going out to play.

"Are Grandpa's weird stories true?"

Tanjiro's eyebrows furrowed. "I thought demon slayers weren't that well known.." Tanjiro questioned Zenitsu.

"INOSUKE STOP TRYING TO FIGHT THE KIDS- huh? Oh uhh I guess it's a folklore around here.. maybe to keep the kids from walking out at night or- INOSUKE NO"

"LITTLE ONES FIGHT MEEEEEEEE!!!"

"No! No Inosuke these are kids, you know? The ones we don't fight!" Tanjiro quickly reassured. "Huh? Why not?? Their just like us but smaller! They can fight!!"

"Oh you got to be kidding me-"

"[Name]! I didn't know you were coming this early- oh hi! Sorry.. I thought you were someone else.." Ashai apologized, he thought [Name] and Ashai came earlier due to the ruckus outside in front. Instead he ran up to a couple of strangers in weird clothes and a shirtless boy in a boar hat.

---------------------------------------------------

So why did this take me a month to post? It's not even that long..

I'll edit this in the morning and answer the other asks in the morning as well.

Remember that requests are still open and have a nice night/day/afternoon/universe

#Demon slayer #Rui #kny #rui demon slayer #kny rui #oneshot

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cwispyhologwam · 4 years ago

Text

Admit it. Rick Sanchez X F!Reader

Word count: 2,382

Rick was... out of it, I guess you could say he was still himself, but not really he just seemed, off. When Morty tried to ask if anything was wrong, Rick would respond in a "normal" Rick way but, it seemed forced. It was barely noticeable but he could tell, even though after Rick basically told him to fuck off he dropped it. It was just after the whole incident with Unity, which didn't make sense to Morty because it seemed like Rick had gotten what he needed and wanted from her, or it, or they, he didn't really know how to refer to the entity, but that's besides the point.

He had spent the whole night in the garage when Morty woke up for school the next morning he found his grandfather passed out at his work bench with a strange device looming over his head. Morty didn't know why but looking at it sent dread coursing through his body, he had a feeling he knew someone who could help him and his grandpa. She was... Rick's friend? (Y/n) (L/n), well honestly he didn't know what their relationship was at the moment, because a few years ago she used to visit daily but again that was years ago, he thinks they might have gotten in a fight or something. But if anyone could help him, it was her.

So he asked his mom to give him a ride to her house, but it took some convincing because what mother wouldn't question why her 14 year old son is going to a 23 year olds house by himself, like what kinda porn set up type bullshit, but after he explained his concerns for his grandpa she agreed. Once he got there he told his mom he would get a ride home and she complied and left. He rang the doorbell of the large house and waited, once the door opened he felt like all the air had been knocked out of his lungs.

She was absolutely gorgeous, her (S/C) skin looked so beautiful in the sun's light and her (long,short,medium) (straight,curly,wavey, kinky) (H/C) hair was beautiful. She was (Tall/short) and (Skinny,medium,thick) it made Morty wonder if her and Rick were ever more than friends at one point. What really got to him was what she was wearing, it was a matching set, a long sleeve sweater and shorts "Morty? Hello? You alright there kid?" He snapped out of his trance and nodded "Sorry, and sorry again for showing up unannounced but i need your help."

She looked at him for a couple of seconds before sighing "Listen first come in it's weird talking outside like this, and second, if this has anything to do with Sanchez I'm sorry but i can't help you." He frowned, why did she call him Sanchez? And why did her (E/C) eyes look so sad when she said it? He came in and she led him to her living room where they sat on the couch "So what happened?" He asked her, he really thought if he knew why she suddenly stopped talking to Rick he would be able to help "Morty, i guarantee if Rick is going through something right now it hasn't got anything to do with me, we haven't talked in years."

How did she know? "How do you know that's the problem?" he asked, she giggled playfully rolling her eyes at him "Rick and i used to work together, well if you could really even call it that, it was more like working next to each other and having conversations. But we were also intimate with each other and i know the only reason you would be here without him is because there's a problem concerning him."

His eyes widened if Rick worked with her that could only mean that she was a genius too, so if they were partners and lovers in one way or another then how could she not be the problem? But then again they hadn't talked in years. She was right there was no way she could be the cause of his grandpa acting strange. With that he felt pretty much defeated, what now? He didn't know how to contact anyone else or even who to talk to, it took him almost two weeks just to find her and she lived on earth there was no way in fuck he’d be able to get in contact with anyone else without Rick.

"So what do i do now (Y/N)? I just want grandpa Rick to go back to normal, I can tell he’s faking being his old self." He sighed and dropped his head, his shoulders slumped, he resembled a kicked puppy in all honesty, they stood in silence for a while before she sighed, "Have you met Unity? Or has he talked to them recently?" she asked with an almost sour look on her face, Morty nodded "Well there you go, she probably fucked him then left again" Morty had an oo0oh moment and nodded.

"Just like all things he'll get over it, now i think it's about time i take you back home yeah?" He nodded, but now he felt kind of bad she seemed really, bothered by something . "(Y/N) have you ever liked Rick? Or you know when you used to come over a lot were you together?" He asked as they walked out the door and to her car. "Yes, we did date at the time, well what i thought was dating until he bluntly told me it was nowhere near that and i was just quote un quote, "something to do." As they got in the car Mortys mouth dropped open no wonder she just disappeared from their life like that.

"i-im sorry Rick’s a real dick sometimes" she shrugged and focused her eyes on the road, ”Listen Morty your grandpa is a lot of things, a dick especially, and when it comes to emotions, especially his own, he becomes a coward, please Morty i know you've picked up about 300 shitty casualties from him but avoid that like your life depends on it. Okay? Or at least promise to try?” Morty could tell how serious she was without even looking at her.

The rest of the ride was silent, once she pulled into the driveway of Morty’s house she groaned seeing that the garage was open and Rick was standing in front of it. With his arms crossed, the moment his eyes landed on (Y/n) she felt her stomach drop, her hands were shaking, which Morty noticed. "Fuck me" she said under her breath, Morty got out the car but she stayed still almost frozen. "B-Bout damn time yo-ughh- you got here." Morty groaned "How did you even know I left?" Rick rolled his eyes "your mom o-obviously di-ugh-dipshit." Morty shook his head and waved goodbye to (y/n).

She waved back, she jumped when she realized Rick was now at her window motioning for her to get out she rolled her eyes before reluctantly getting out. He looked her up and down before stopping and staring at her lips, his eyes just sat there for a good minute before she cleared her throat. "Did you have something to say or did you just wanna stand here lookin’ stupid?" He scoffed before taking a swig of his flask "Y-You know yo-ughhh you never wer- seemed like one to hold a g-grudge. Thought yo-you wou-ughh would have got- been over it b-by now."

she stared at him with a blank expression before she back handed him sending him stumbling "wha-what the fuck!?" he exclaimed as he looked at her he was gonna say more till he noticed the tears streaming down her expressionless face "How long have we known each other rick?" he looked at her questionably "hey y-your ughh c--" she cut him off her voice a little louder than before "How fucking long rick?" he stood up right and looked into her watery (e/c) eyes as he held his cheek. "5 years" she nodded "and how many times in those 5 years did you introduce me to the many girls you fucked, the girls you ploughed mindlessly just to get off?”

he looked at her questionably again "none." he said simply "how many of them did you introduce to birdperson, or squanchy, or the people you know from other fuckin universes, Matter of fuckin’ fact, how many of those whores did you see walking around with different dimension ricks at the citadle?" he didn't have to think at all before saying "none" she nodded

"Rick not only, not fuckin’ only did you introduce me to squanchy, birdperson, and other Rick’s and their (y/n), when you decided you were ready to go back into Beths life you introduced me to your family, to your only daughter, to your nephew, your niece, and the dickhead that you cant fuckin’ stand for knockin you daughter up, that that in itself should be enough proof that im not just a hole off the street for you to have fun with" he stood silently still looking into her (e/c) eyes.

"And that the crazy fuckin’ thing rRick! not once did we even have sex, we never went further than sleep naked together! So for you to have looked me directly in my fucking face, and tell me that I was simply something to do didn't hurt, what hurt was the fact that you lied! You lied Rick! Straight through yo motha fuckin’ teeth! The fact that you're a genius doesn't mean shit to me when you don't even have the damn brain capacity to admit when you care about someone! You are a fuckin coward! I know you're scared to be hurt again, fine! But dont fucking pussy out and act like the shit that we had meant nothing!"

Rick was at a lost for words he didn't want to get attached to anyone since Diane and he knew that, he watched as (Y/n) wiped the tears from her eyes ``It hurts like a bitch to love someone so much, and to know that they love you back but won't admit it, it just makes you feel like they’re ashamed of you, like you're ashamed of me, Rick i asked for nothing when we first met." she sighed

“I told you that i just wanted to learn, you took that as if i can get the bitch to trust me enough i can eventually fuck her, yet you never even made a move Rick, your exact words were, i dont want you talking to anyone else, and i accepted that as your fucked up way of asking me out. i never once asked to label us because i already knew what we were, i thought i actually meant something to you.” The two sat in silence for a couple minutes she had hoped he would say something, and when he didn't she shook her head and got ready to get back in her car " I have to go, tell Morty to come see me whenever i guess." she turned ready to get in her car till she fell through a lime green portal. She landed in Rick's room, on his bed to be exact Rick soon came in after opening another portal and walked through.

“When normal people want to talk they usually use their words.” she said as she rolled her eyes and stoop up intending to leave, she wasn't the person she was 5 years ago, he couldn't kiss and caress his way out of this one. She was sick of him talking his way out of things his words couldn't be trusted and his actions were misleading so at this point fuck it, fuck him, fuck his hugs, his kisses, his scent, fuck the way he looked at her with longing eyes and made her weak in the knees.

Fuck everything, enough was enough, either he wanted to be with her, or he didnt those were his options, she hadnt even realized tears were freely falling down her (S/C) cheeks, she was shaking, she had tried to pursue a relationship with at least 10 other men and it all failed, she was taping her foot fast with her arms crossed as she kept looking at the ground

She didnt want him to see her like that the man had barely said a fuckin word and here she stood crying her eyes out, damn near hyperventilating “I’m sorry … you’re right, i am a fuckin coward and everything you said is true … fuck this is making me nauseous, all this sappy bullshit, to sum up this shit show of our relationship i love you, i am a cunt for pulling that bullshit, like you didnt mean anything to me because unfortunately you do, i gave into the pathetic chemical reaction that makes me just as human and vulnerable as the rest of our shitty race, hell i might even be a little less Rick because of this shit but if it means you wont disappear again …. It's worth it.”

She slowly approached Rick and buried her face in his chest as she cried, finally the dickhead admitted to well, being a dickhead and a liar, and a coward, and a cunt pussy shit fuck bastard, and his way of apologizing, it was.. Shitty but that's what she expected, he held her tightly kissing the top of her head inhaling her sent messaging her scalp through her (kinky,curly,thick,straight) hair

Once again they'd be sharing the night together she already knew he wasn't letting her leave so after she had stopped crying and did all the things she needed to do before she went to sleep she crawled into bed with him usually shed sleep on his chest but tonight rick insisted on sleeping on her chest probably his way of making sure she stayed there. Of course the two were butterball ass naked it was the only way she could sleep, “i love you” rick said just as she was drifting to sleep she smiled and kissed his forehead “i love you too.”

#rick sanchez #x reader #fanfic #rick and morty #language #anger vent #rick x y/n

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