#and my mom has slipped up once or twice too because he’s she/hering me

[bookwyrminspiration]

im getting she/girled (non-maliciously) and is it a big deal? no. but man am i Aware of it

[dira333]

Big, butiful and nice - Fatgum x Reader

I have carried this idea with me for a while. This features a single Mom! Reader, so if kids aren't your thing, you don't have to read it. Pure Fluff. Tagging @missalienqueen @bbglay @pixiesavvy @itsyoursunshinebabe @marti-mp4

“UP! UP!” Chubby arms reach for him and huge eyes twinkle up at him over a row of missing teeth.

“Oh?” Toyomitsu reaches down and picks the little girl up. “Who are you?”

“Etsuko.” She tells him proudly, trying to reach for the zipper of his costume. 

“Hi, Etsuko. Where is your mommy?”

“Dead.”

He stills. Oh.

“Etsuko?!” A woman in a business suit rushes around the corner, spots the little girl and halts. “You can’t just run off!”

It’s only then that you notice him - not that he’s trying to hide in his big form.

“Oh! Oh, I’m so sorry, Mr. Fatgum, Sir! I was just showing Etsuko the on-site childcare when she ran off! Please, let me take her, I don’t know why she bothered you.”

“Big!” Etsuko explains simply. “I can see the world!” 

“Yes, you do!” Toyomitsu bounces her once, twice and revels in her giggles. “And don’t worry, it happens.” He transfers the little girl to your arms, watches with fondness as she immediately snuggles into your side. “Your…?”

“Niece, Sir. She’s my niece. I just… uh, I just transferred this week and this is all pretty new for us, but I promise we’ll be totally professional from now on.”

“Oh, please don’t.” He laughs, waving his hand, “That’d be boring, right?”

You look a little dumbfounded. It’s pretty, he notices, when your features soften. When you’re not constantly focused on looking all-serious.

“Boss?” A voice asks from the other end of the hallway. He turns to see Kirishima, all dressed up in his costume and eager to get going. Toyomitsu nods and turns back to you. 

“I guess I’ll see you around. And Etsuko,” he boops her nose, “Keep smiling, okay?”

-

“Mr. Fatgum, Sir?” Toyomitsu looks up from his Desk and the assortment of food spread across its expanse.

You’re dressed in a different suit this time, the dull grey color of it making you look like a banker coming to collect his soul. He shivers. 

“I have the analysis. Do you want to go over it now or later?”

“If you don’t mind me eating while you talk, we can go over it now.”

You nod and slip into the chair on the other side of his desk.

You’re a professional, he can tell. You stick out of their agency like a sore-thumb, but you’re probably also the voice of reason they need the most. 

Yes, he’s on Number 58, but he’s also too slack with his employees. Lord knows there are many things he could improve.

You show him charts and numbers, studies and graphs. You’re smart, he can tell, to the point that he can’t help but interrupt you.

“Did you just do that calculation in your head?”

“Oh… oh yeah, it’s my… it’s my Quirk.” You explain, seemingly embarrassed by it. “I’ve got a computer for a brain, basically.”

“That’s cool.”

You shrug. Your eyes flicker to the Takoyaki. He pushes them towards you, silently offering them.

“Oh, no, I shouldn’t.” You wave your hands but he shakes his head. “Take one. Tell me about yourself for a bit, will you? You transferred here from Endeavours Agency, right?”

“Yes.” You nod, still eyeing the Takoyaki. He picks one up and hands it to you, watching the emotions flicker over your face. Eventually, you pop it into your mouth and chew and he’s lucky to have been watching because happiness flickers over your face like a shooting star over the night sky.

“Another?” Toyomitsu hands you another one. It doesn’t take long for the dish to vanish.

You must have been hungry, or maybe it’s just your favorite dish, but the food has softened your features, blurred the harsh lines that you draw yourself in.

“My sister died unexpectedly. I don’t know who Etsuko’s father is, but my parents died when I was a teen and I’m the only one she has left. I did love working for Endeavour, I really did, but it’s no place for a single mother. I heard you offered on-site childcare, so I applied.”

“And what do you think of us so far?”

“Well,” you reach for your tablet again, but he stops you.

“Without the numbers, please?”

You hesitate for a second. “It’s… it’s warm, I guess. Everyone’s really nice here and no one minds when Etsuko runs off yet again, coming to find me in my office. I know it’s my job to look for opportunities to improve your brand and your agency, but I am constantly at odds.”

“Why is that?” 

“If you could have an Agency like Endeavour, would you do it if it meant giving up all the things that make you special?”

He considers it. If there’s no on-site childcare at Endeavour’s, and he’d have to give this one up, quite a few of his employees would fall away. Like Kuno-kun, who brings in his daughter and his wife’s homemade baking. Or Noda-san, who knits scarfs for everyone in the winter and who’s using the child-care for her grandsons. 

There’d be no longer the laughter of children heard in the hallways, no more drawings handed over at the end of a semester.

“No, I don’t think I’d want to give that up. At least not all of it. But we could find a compromise, I guess. Make the best of what we are. If that means we’ll stay at Nr. 58, I’m fine with that. Being a Hero doesn’t mean to have the highest rank, but to save the most people, right?”

Surprise flickers over your face. 

It’s gone as fast as it came but he likes to believe that he made an impact on you.

-

“How are you all doing today?”

Almost fifteen children surround him. The older ones are holding back in favor of the younger ones, he can tell, but they’re all so eager to tell him about their adventures.

“One after the other, okay?” Toyomitsu settles on a nearby chair. “But first we have to ask: who’s our newest member?”

Etsuko steps forward. Her hair is pulled up into little pigtails and she looks adorable.

“Hi, Etsuko. Do you want to sit on my lap today? You have to be careful though, because if you lean too much into me, I might suck you in.”

Her eyes widen, but the kids around her giggle. “Do it!” They tell her. “It’s so much fun.”

So she does, giggling almost hysterically as the fat absorption kicks in. Only her head’s left out, her pigtails whipping around as she shakes her head, giggling.

“If you want out, all you have to do is tell me, okay? No kicking.”

She nods. 

At the end of this month's visit to the children, he leaves with a hand full of drawings and one sucker, tucked into his hand by one of the older children. 

Toyomitsu’s almost down the hallway when he feels someone tugging at his legs. He turns to see Etsuko toddling after him. She reaches for him. 

“Up?” She asks and he can’t say no to her big eyes and her small pout.

If he walks around the agency for a bit with her sitting on his shoulder instead of directly taking her back, that’s his secret and his secret alone.

-

Months pass.

Toyomitsu implements the first of your proposals. His ranking moves, slowly at first, until he finds himself at Nr. 35. 

Etsuko has begun sneaking into his office once a week, handing him a drawing or a slice of fruit, left over from her lunch. Sometimes he lets her sit on his lap, listening to her talk about her day. 

Certainly, you must know about it. How else could she bring in expensive chocolates one day and have your handwriting on her drawing the next, clearly pointing out that the yellow blob is him? 

He’s been thinking a lot about you lately. 

More than he should about one of his employees. 

But he likes the way you talk, all serious one second, rattling down numbers and statistics, until he makes a joke and you can’t stop giggling, your voice suddenly smooth and soft.

He likes the way you look in the early mornings when Etsuko’s done her best to make you late, when your hair’s not done up perfectly and you’re missing your usual makeup. Or when you’d been with her for lunch and no one’s told you yet that there’s a sticky handprint on your blouse or your skirt is wrinkled, no doubt from Etsuko pulling on it.

You love your niece and he loves to see all signs of it, like an imprint you cannot wipe away.

So far, you haven’t shown any signs of interest in him.

You’ve started calling him by his last name, though, foregoing the “Sir” for most of the time. 

But that doesn’t mean that you’d consider a date with him, right? 

Or is he starting to get delusional?

-

“What do you think, Daddy?” Toyomitsu freezes. 

Etsuko’s sitting on his lap, fingertip moving over one of her drawings as she explains.

It had been a perfectly fine moment up until now.

“What did you just call me?”

“Daddy!” She looks up at him, grinning so wide it must hurt her face. “Because you’re my Daddy.”

“I… well…” He struggles. He doesn’t know what to say. “Etsuko, you cannot call me that.”

“Eh? Why?” She pulls at his shirt. “Are you not my Daddy?”

“No, Etsuko. I’m not your Daddy. I like you a lot and I want to be your friend, but I’m not your Daddy.”

Her eyes start to water and he can feel himself panicking. He’s normally not that bad with kids, but this… this is just catching him on the wrong foot at the wrong time.

“Look,” he tries to explain. “It’s like with your Aunty, right? She loves you a lot, but she’s not your Mommy.”

“But you’re my Daddy!” Etsuko’s hands are balled into fists now. “Mommy said that Daddy was big and butiful and nice! You are my Daddy.”

“Oh, Etsuko.” Toyomitsu pulls her in, realizing her mistake. She’s crying into his shirt now, her tears more fueled by confusion and anger than real sadness. He lets her cry it out before he picks her up.

“I think we need to talk to your Aunty for a moment about this, okay?”

-

He hadn’t thought your face could turn any more serious, but he’d been mistaken. 

There’s no softness left in your features as he explains. Etsuko’s sitting on your lap now, face snuggled into your blazer. He’s pretty sure that’s going to leave stains, but he’s also sure he shouldn’t point it out right now.

“I didn’t know,” you say. And “I’m sorry she bothered you this much.” And “I will make sure this doesn’t happen again.”

At some point he realizes that you’re no longer listening to him, ears closed off from his explanations. He can do nothing but leave you, wondering if he’s just ruined everything that could have possibly been.

-

For the following week, he gets no visits from Etsuko.

Toyomitsu does not dare to visit her in childcare either, unsure of what you want.

But he’s got an appointment with you on Thursday that he puts all his hopes on.

When you come in he can tell that you must have spent an extra minute preparing yourself beforehand, because there is no hair out of place and you’re wearing lipgloss like battle armor.

He feels wholly unprepared for this fight, even less so after losing a quarter of his body fat in yesterday’s fight.

But the sight of him, so much smaller and thinner than you’ve gotten to know him, seems to soften the resolve in your eyes.

“Are you okay?” You ask. 

“If you refer to my body, I will be. I have to eat a lot in the next few days to get back to my usual form, but it’s nothing I can’t handle. If you refer to something else… No, I’m not okay with how this played out.

“About that…” You gingerly sink into your chair, hands folded over your lap. You’re not looking at him. “I did some more research. I should have done that ages ago. I… I’ve found Etsuko’s father.”

His heart beats painfully.

“Who is it?”

“His name’s Kan Sekijiro. I don’t know if you know hi-”

“Vlad King?”

“Ah, yes. So you know him?”

“I know of him. One of his students interned here. He’s… did you contact him?”

“Not yet.” You purse your lips. Considering that all Etsuko knew about her father… I am sorry that she got you confused. I know this is highly unprofessional and-”

“I don’t care.”

You still. Your eyes flicker over to him.

“Look,” he leans forward, can’t help it. He needs you to understand this. “This isn’t just Etsuko’s doing alone. I like spending time with her. I could have stopped anytime, bring her back every time she came over to my office. I didn’t put a stop on it and maybe I should have, but I…”

“What?”

“I have to preface this by saying that I don’t want to make you uncomfortable, or… or put you in a tight spot because I’m your employer, but-”

“Spit it out.” Your words are harsh and rushed and he can tell you regret them the second they leave your mouth. But you’re right. He’s stalling.

“I am interested in you.”

Your jaw slackens, your features soften with that well-known dumbfoundedness. 

As you bury your face in your hands, he can feel his heart sink. Fighting criminals is so much easier than facing rejection.

“Are you okay?” He asks when your face doesn’t come back up. You nod into your hands.

“Are you sure? You’re not looking too good there.”

“It feels like my Quirk is overloading. I am…”

“Overthinking? I am familiar with that. Not that I suffer from it, but you’ve met Suneater, I guess.” He tries to joke, make light of the situation. It’s what makes you finally lift your head.

“If you’re serious,” you bite through your teeth, “About this. About… Etsuko and me. I… I’d take you out to dinner.”

Toyomitsu blinks. He’s expected everything but that.

“Are you serious?” He asks and you groan. 

“No, I mean yes. But… you know how much I eat, right?”

You huff, looking away. He’s not the worlds expert in flirting, but you do look kinda flustered. 

“I might have looked up All-You-Can-Eat-Restaurants ever since I’ve gotten to know you,” you mumble and the pout on your lips looks eerily like Etsuko’s.

-

“I’m home!” Toyomitsu calls out from the Genkan.

To his surprise, no tiny feet come running. When he peeks around the corner he finds you curled up on the Couch, an open book next to you on the floor. You must have fallen asleep reading.

“Hey,” he cards a hand through your hair to wake you gently. “Shouldn’t Sekijiro be back before dinner?”

“What?” You try to wipe the sleep from your eyes while snuggling into him. “Oh, no, he called before I took a nap. He’s bringing her back after Dinner. Apparently, they’re making pancakes.”

“Ah, did you tell him to bring leftovers?” He jokes, chuckling when you nod earnestly.

.

Life is good. 

He’s got a wife and a daughter and his daughter’s father has turned into a good friend.

He’s got a job he enjoys, a Quirk he can rely on and so far he’s been able to stay himself.

There’s not much he’d wish for nowadays. 

Well, except maybe some more food.

.

You’re still on the Couch when he walks into the kitchen, fully intending to make Dinner as soon as he’s gotten a little snack from the fridge.

But inside the fridge is a huge box. He furrows his brows and pulls it out. He recognizes the branding, but you only buy a cake at this bakery for important dates, like your wedding anniversary or Etsuko’s first day in kindergarten.

“Baby, did I miss an event?” He asks, flipping open the lid.

“Why do you ask?”

“There’s a cake in the fri-”

“Don’t open it!” You yell, rushing over. But the lid’s already open. The buttercream frosting is light blue and the icing a dark blue. Big, bold letters write out “World’s best Dad!”

“This is nice,” he says as you reach him, clearly out of breath and a little haggard. “But you didn’t have to buy an expensive cake to let me know. Not that I mind. Or is it for Sekijiro?”

“Ah,” your face is doing some weird contortions. 

His eyes flicker back to the icing and something in his head clicks at the color.

“Taishirou, I’m pregnant.”

[aemondapologistfrfr]

Forbidden Flames

benjicot blackwood x strong!fem!reader//

oc!arryn!targ!male x strong!fem!reader

Summary: You take after your mother in more ways than one and the current Queen Alicent has no problem telling you that she’s aware. 

Warnings: 18+ swearing, infidelity, oral(f), p in v, birth but nothing too descriptive, time jumps

Authors Note: a request from @chainsawsangel that I sat on for a while 😣😭 no interaction with the oc tbh 

Word Count: 3.7k

⊹˚₊‧꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷‧₊˚⊹

I knew from a young age that I wouldn’t have much of a choice over anything in my life. Shortly after my first word I was betrothed to someone who I’ve never even met. I’ve been paraded around meetings with my mother on a daily basis and was told to sit there and listen. The only reprieve I had was when she would invite all of her allies to court and I could interact with their children. 

The first time I met him I begged my mom to never invite the Blackwoods back to court again. He had a dirty mouth and would talk about such violence against his rival house. The second time he visited we were both a couple years older and caught each other’s eye. His dirty mouth would whisper into my ear until I turned into a blushing mess and then leave me in the halls to trail after him. As the years went by we truly fell for one another. We began to come up with excuses for him to come to court at least once a moon and would send dozens of ravens in between the visits. 

Once my betrothed arrived to court we had to become a little more sly but we couldn’t give each other up. He is the only thing I’ve ever chosen for myself and I’m not getting rid of him. I’ve come to terms with my sin because after all I’m the fruit of such sin. It was no surprise to me when my first babe came out with a head full of dark brown hair. 

My husband didn’t think twice about it and kept on his day. Jasper Arryn has always been sweet to me but we never really emotionally connected in the way we needed to. He is my mother’s youngest uncle and bears the silver hair of a Targaryen. He’s handsome I’ll admit, but he’s just not my Benji. 

⊹˚₊‧꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷‧₊˚⊹

One year after first born

I fix my gown smoothing it down and brushing back my hair. I walk over to my babbling baby and pinch his cheeks and tickle his tummy. I scoop him up into my arms as he continues to laugh as I fly him around the room in my arms. His baby dragon runs at our feet softly chirping. I dip down so my son can play with his dragon before sweeping us out of our chambers. 

“Someone special is here to visit you for your name day.” I coo kissing at his neck and we start down the stairs. As we walk people dip their heads to us and offer us warm greetings. We step out into the afternoon sun and I gaze around the yard. 

“Princess Y/n, I’m absolutely delighted to have run into you.” his voice sends butterflies into my stomach as I turn and a smile spreads across his face. 

“Benjicot.” I hum walking closer. 

“Happy early name day, my Prince.” his voice drops lower and he looks to our son. “You look very healthy, Aelor.” he brushes the babes hair back and Aelor coos grabbing his finger. 

“Come to my chambers.” I whisper. 

“Jasper?” he tilts his head. 

“Off on the hunt already.” I nod turning to head back into the Keep. I make my way around the main floor and take a back we to my chambers so I’m seen around and away from the courtyard. I slip back into my chambers and bounce Aelor on my hip as I wait for Benji. Three knocks and he’s slipping inside and walking over to us with a smile. 

“He’s a man grown now.” he scoops Aelor out of my hands and holds him in his. “I hope you’re not giving your mom too much trouble.” he tickles his neck as Aelor begins to squeal. His dragon uncurls and runs over to us flapping his wings as Aelor keeps laughing. We all sit on the ground together playing with his blocks and toys as my heart swells. 

“I’ve missed you dearly.” I look to him with love. 

“I wish we didn’t have to be apart.” he sighs looking at our son. 

“Me too.” I look to him with longing. 

“I don’t want to miss him growing up. That’s my boy.” he looks to Aelor with watery eyes. 

“I want to have another.” he head snaps back over to me. 

“Do not jest.” his tone low. 

“I’ll be right back.” I hum scooping up Aelor and his dragon follows us out of our chambers. I ask my maid to care for him while I rest and the dragon keepers come and retrieve his dragon. I slip back into my chambers and Benji is pulling me against him quickly. 

“Do you mean it?” he looks down to me. 

“I want to have another child with you, Benji. Aelor should have someone to grow up with.” I gasp as he kisses me fiercely. 

“I will give you as many as you desire, my love.” he kisses down my jaw pulling the laces of my dress loose. He has me free of all of my clothes in between heated kisses. I pull his tunic off and sigh as his heated skin touches mine. He lays me back on the bed before burying his head between my thighs. 

“Gods Benji,” I cry out pushing myself onto his face. He swirls around my bud while pushing his fingers into me. My hips jerk against his face as my high builds. I pull against his hair while he uses his free hand to hold me still while he laps against me. My legs close around him as I come undone pulling him up my body. 

“I’ll make sure I give you another babe.” he grunts pushing into me. I whine as he slowly dips in and out. 

“Benji,” I pant. “Faster, please,” my voice breaks as he begins to snap his hips into me. 

“This better for you, Princess?” he taunts as he pounds into me. I shake with pleasure every time he brushes against my throbbing bud. He dips down to my neck to kiss and lick while I arch into him. “Taking me so good.” he grunts and I come undone around him. He continues to trust into me at a face pace and I’m whimpering below him as my pleasure threatens to spill over again. 

“Benji, I-“ I cry out as my pleasure slams through me and I stills filling me with my name on his tongue. 

“Fuck,” he pants resting his forehead on mine. He rolls his hips into mine and a broken moan falls from my lips. “I can’t wait to see you growing with our child again.” he continues to rock into me until he hardens again. 

⊹˚₊‧꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷‧₊˚⊹

Six months later 

I wait in my chambers propped up on pillows playing with Aelor on the ground. I’ve sent Benji instruction on how to get to my chambers unnoticed and we’re awaiting him patiently. I hear soft knocks on the door and Benji enters closing the doors behind him. 

“Look at you both.” he hums with a smile sitting on the ground with us. “How are you, my love?” he leans across and kisses me. 

“It’s going as smoothly as the first time.” I smile resting my hand on my bump. 

“I’m glad to hear.” he rests his hand on top of mine. “I hope you’ve been a kind little prince.” he scoops Aelor up who giggles in his arms. 

“I want you to be with us.” my heart hurts looking at them. “Or us with you.” my voice breaks as I start to cry. 

“Let’s go to mommy.” Benji coos and they surround me with their embrace. “We have right now and I’m thankful of that.” he dries my tears. 

“I want us to be a family.” I hiccup as my tears start anew.

“Come on.” he helps me up and picks up Aelor. He walks us to the bed and we lay curled together. He brushes my hair back while Aelor sleeps between us. 

“We are a family. It’s just a little different but it’s ours.” he says softly. I grab his hand and place a kiss on it before bringing it to my bump. 

“I want our children to know you are their father. I want you to raise them.” my eyes search his. 

“I will make a plan and figure it out.” he nods to me, promise laced in his voice. 

⊹˚₊‧꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷‧₊˚⊹

Birth

“One last push, Princess.” the midwife’s voice centers me. “We can see the babes head.” she nods smiling at me. My eyes screw shut as I give everything into this last push. 

“Excellent work,” the maesters calm voice is followed by a cry. I open my eyes and let out a breathy chuckle. “A boy.” he smiles wrapping him and handing him to me. 

“What will you name him?” my handmaiden beams above me. 

“Vaelon.” I hum holding him against me brushing back his dark wisps of hair.

“Congratulations, Princess.” Alicents voice confuses me as I look up. “I wanted to check on you and the babe. See if you need anything.” her tone condescending as he peaks over the blanket at the babe. “Hm.”

“Thank you, Your Grace.” I hold my son away from her grasp. 

“Where might the father be?” she raises her eyebrows looking around. “Do be sure to let me know if you need anything.” she turns and stops when she spots the egg is the babes cradle. “It’s curious how those seem to hatch.” her words causing me to blink before she’s out of my chambers. 

“Can you find my mother?” I ask my handmaiden. 

“Of course,” she nods and is slipping out of the door quickly. 

“Help me up.” I nod to the midwife. 

“Princess, you should rest.” she tries to settle me back onto the bed. 

“I wish to bathe him.” I nod my head as another midwife grabs Vaelon so I can stand. My legs wobble as I hold my arms out for my babe once more. He coos in my arms as I slowly shuffle over to the basin. 

“My sweet girl,” my mother’s arms are wrapped around mine steadying me. “You should be abed.” she helps me start to clean off the babe. 

“I like to be the first one to bathe babe.” I hum my brain starting to cloud from the energy I exuded minutes ago. 

“I remember from Aelor.” I can hear the smile in her voice. “What is this little princes name?” she hums trickling water through his hair. 

“Vaelon.” I hum wiping at his face. 

“Where is Jasper?” her voice soft. 

“Probably off hunting.” I shrug not caring. I wrap Vaelon back up and walk him over to his cradle next to my bed. I place him on the small bed and his limbs fan out and he has a little hand outstretched to the egg. 

“Let’s get you back into bed.“ she hums helping me lay back. I sigh as my back meets the soft mattress. She grabs a clean cloth and wets it before coming back to me. She wipes at my face and brushes my hair back. She dismisses the midwives and maester before she crawls into bed with me. 

“Thank you, mother.” I hum as she continues to brush my hair back. “Alicent was here the second the babe came.” my voice distant as I close my eyes. 

“What on earth for?” she tries to calm her voice but I can hear the anger. 

“To call my son a bastard and basically say I’m wasting dragon eggs.” she continues to brush my hair back. “I’m sorry, mother. I tried to love Jasper.” my voice breaks as I feel tears pour down my face. 

“Shh, shh,” she hums scooting closer to me. “You and your babes are healthy. That’s all I care about. Rest.” she continues to whisper soothing words to me as I drift off. 

⊹˚₊‧꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷‧₊˚⊹

Four months after Vaelons birth 

I stroll through the gardens alone soaking in the sun and the life around me. The birds sing sweet songs as I stop and smell the flowers. As I turn the corner my handmaiden comes rushing over to me and I begin to panic that something has happened. 

“Princess,” she stops in front of me out of breath. “Vaelons egg is hatching.” a smile splits across my face as we race back into the Keep. 

“Mommy,” Aelor whines and wobbles over to me. I scoop him up and we walk to Vaelon in his cradle watching the egg be pushed open from the inside. A sky blue dragon pops its head out and squirms the rest of the way out softly chirping. It looks to Vaelon before curling up at his side. I bounce Aelor on my hip as we watch them both sleep below us. 

“I’ll go fetch the dragon keepers.” my handmaiden says and I nod pulling a chair to the side of the cradle to watch them. The dragon keepers come in and congratulate me and Vaelon. They look over the dragon and nod happily at his health. 

“I wish to have time with my sons.” I say softly dismissing everyone. After about ten minutes my heart starts to flutter at who should be walking through my doors. 

“Daddy.” Aelor cries wiggling out of my arms as Benji enters. 

“Hello my little Prince.” he grabs him and tosses him in the air as Aelor giggles and squeals. “Where is my littlest Prince?” he hums gliding over to me and the cradle. 

“He’s asleep.” I hum looking up at him. Benji dips down and places a soft kiss on my lips before rising to look down at Vaelon again. 

“His egg hatched.” he looks to me with a wide smile. 

“Just a bit ago.” I nod my head biting my lip. He sets Aelor on the ground who goes to play as we admire our youngest. 

“Daddy’s so proud of you.” his words soft as he brushes against Vaelons hair. He stirs in his crib and turns to curl up with his dragon. 

“I think we should talk with my mother.” I smile looking up at Benji. 

“About what, my love?” he kneels next to me looking up at me with adoration. 

“She can make it so we can be together. I don’t care what people say about me. They already say it so I might as well get to have you all the time.” I brush his hair back as he smiles. 

“Shall I go get her?” he grabs my hand and places it in his kissing it softly. 

“No stay.” I hold his hand against me. “I’ll send my handmaiden. I poke my head out the door  and ask my guard to have my handmaiden fetch my mother and we wait in my chambers playing with Aelor. 

“Yes, my sweet girl?” my mother sweeps into my chambers and stops when she sees Benji. “I’m sorry, I thought-“ she goes to turn back to the door with red cheeks. 

“Mother wait.” I reach out. “We wanted to talk to you.” I look at her with pleading eyes. 

“What can I do for you both?” she hums taking a seat on the ground with us and Aelor crawls into her lap. 

“I want to be with Benji.” my words hushed as I nibble my lip. “I want to be happy. I want us to be a family.” I feel myself tear up as she looks to me. 

“Just give me some time and I will figure it out.” she nods to me and begins to play with Aelor. 

“Thank you.” I grab her hand. “Vaelons egg hatched today.” she looks up to me with a wide smile. 

“Let’s see.” she starts to get up and I lead her over to the cradle. “Look at them.” she coos turning to me with watery eyes. 

“His colors are so vibrant.” I run a finger down the dragons scales. 

“I’m proud of you.” she hums pulling me into a hug. “Give me some time and I promise you that you will all be together.” she whispers smoothing my hair. 

⊹˚₊‧꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷‧₊˚⊹

Two months later

I sit in the council chambers as everyone stares at me once more. I’m getting flashbacks to my childhood of meetings except this time I don’t care about the whispers. I look to my mother hopeful as she rises from her chair. 

“Jasper never returned from the Kings Wood last week. Our hunts for him bore no information. At this point we can only assume the worst.” the members look to me as tears stream down my face but little do they know that they’re tears of happiness that I can finally peruse Benji. 

I have no idea where or what happened to Jasper. My mother saw to his disappearance and told me not to worry about it. Once the meeting ends I sweep out of the council chambers and seal myself in my chambers as I await Benjis arrival. I sit on the ground with my children smiling at them. Aelor brings Vaelon toys and shows him how to play and it warms my heart to see my boys so close. 

“Daughter?” my mothers voice carries through my doors. 

“Come.” I hum and she enters and Benji is close behind her. 

“Benji.” I smile and he comes and sits on the ground with us.

“Just give me one more moon and then we will announce your courtship.” she looks down at us lovingly. 

“Thank you, for everything.” I look up at her with watery eyes. 

“Of course.” she nods her head. “I’ll let you guys have some time.” she hums filtering out of my chambers. 

“How are you?” Benji pulls me against him. 

“So happy. Everything is finally working out for us.” I pull his lips against mine. 

“Do you want for me to move here?” he whispers against my lips. 

“I would be content if we moved a bit away from Kings Landing and lived on a farm. Our dragons can offer us protection and you can hunt with them. While I stay home and raise our babes and cook us dinner..” I hum trailing off. 

“You seem to have it all planned out.” he smiles scooping up Vaelon and Aelor climbs into my lap. 

“We can have some more children.” I brush Aelors hair back as he tries to wiggle back over to Benji. 

“That sounds like an absolute dream.” his eyes darken. “It was always my biggest regret that I wasn’t with you when you carried them.” he bites his cheek. 

“I don’t know. I got pretty demanding.” I giggle and he shakes his head. 

“Then I’ll meet every single one of your demands. Happily.” he hums.

⊹˚₊‧꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷‧₊˚⊹

Six months after Jaspers ‘disappearance’

I’m sitting in an open field as my sons giggle and play together. I lay back and soak in the sun as our three dragons fly above us dipping and chirping in the breeze. Benji is tending to our animals and I wait for him to join us with a smile on my face. 

“How are you, my beautiful wife?” he hums laying next to me spreading his hands across my growing bump. 

“Content. Loved. In love.” I look to him with a smile. 

“Do you think we’ll have another boy?” he hums laying us back in the grass. 

“I’m hoping for a girl.” I giggle as he peppers kisses across my face. 

“Gods, we’ll have a miniature version of you running around keeping our boys in line.” he rolls onto his side resting his hand on my bump once more. “You’re absolutely radiant.” his words soft. 

“My mother sent a letter saying she’ll fly in at the end of the week with an egg for her.” I looking up once more watching our dragons circle us. 

“Do you have a name in mind for our daughter?” he chuckles holding me closer to him. 

“I have a couple but I’ll have to meet her first.” I brush his hair back. “Incoming.” I whisper too late as our sons jump on Benji.

“How are my little princes today?” he rolls over with them and showers them with affection. 

“Good,” Aelor wiggles out of his grasp before running through the grass. Benji scoops up Vaelon and chases after Aelor as he giggles wildly.

I slowly get up and make my way back into the house to begin preparing for dinner. I softly hum to myself as I chop up the different ingredients and push them into an iron pot. I hear them before they even bound through the front door. 

“You can’t catch me, daddy.” Aelor sprints through the front door and hides behind me. Benji ducks through the door with Vaelon on his shoulders and hunts around the house. 

“Seems as if your brother is missing.” Benji says to Vaelon as Aelor giggles from behind of me. “Did you hear that?” he whispers stalking around the table. 

“Behind mommy.” Vaelon points and Aelor lets out a squeal and runs back out the front door with them trailing after him. 

I finish cooking with a smile on my face. I call them inside and they come running and sit around the table. This is our daily routine and I genuinely couldn’t be more content. The rest of the night we settle down together and read our boys bedtime stories before their little eyes shut for the night. 

“Come,” he helps me up from the chair. “I wish to look at the stars with you.” he hums taking me down the stairs. 

⊹˚₊‧꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦︶︶︶︶︶︶︶꒦꒷‧₊˚⊹

masterlist 🔌 

taglist ✍️

@clarityisnofun @gabriella-aesthetic @callsignwidow @llynx7 @violetiss3lfish @ka1afbr @akiko-oo @papichulo120627 @lizzylovebooks280501 @thatgirl101blog @ashovertheriver @zanygot7straykidsbonk @hueanhdang @malfoycassimalfoy @april-notthemonth69 @anaviieiraaa @p45510n4f4shi0n @neocockthotology @thereaderwitch @hardkiddonut @faenyra

[slafkovskys]

Wren coming home saying she has a bf.

All the guys would freak out.

the last place that a sixteen-year-old wren wanted to be on a tuesday was sitting in the stands of jj’s hockey practice, but a broken foot and her refusal to get her driver’s license like drew had done immediately after their birthday a few weeks before has her parked beside angel scrolling through her phone. her attention is only called away from her phone screen when the shrill sound of the whistle blows or any of the younger kids get a little too rowdy in the breezeway. angel only nudges her oldest with a sly grin, “you were like that once.”

“i wasn’t!” she insists, staring at her mother.

“wren, you screamed for five minutes at the nhl awards one year because your dad was holding millie instead of you.”

“i-” her defense is cut off by her phone lighting up. her cheeks burn as her eyes read over the message. she clicks the button on the side and looks out on the ice, easily finding her youngest sister in the crowd, “would you be mad if i went to dinner with river?”

“now?” angel looks at her daughter. wren covers her face, hiding from her mother as she nods her head, “why would i be mad? just tell me where you’re going and if plans change. curfew is ten.”

she looks almost unsure, “but you’ll be by yourself-”

“i’m thirty-nine years old, katherine. i can be left unsupervised. is he already here?” angel questions and rolls her eyes when wren nods, “then go. your dads will be here soon anyway.”

“love you!” she calls, throwing her arms around her mom before hobbling out of the aisle and up the stairs in her boot.

angel sighs, running a hand through her hair as she takes in the quiet that now surrounds her. drew was at play practice and millie was at the mall with her friends, looking for an outfit for a concert they were supposed to be going to in the next few weeks. angel hadn’t gotten a text from her third born in a while, so maybe the sparkly dress she had last sent her had won?

the sounds of blades cutting through ice have become a familiar noise to angel over the last nineteen years, so it’s not hard for her to slip into her thoughts. even in her alone time, her mind is plagued by her kids and partners’ schedules, events and games and practices coming up in the next week.

oh! and she had to finalize details for a baby shower because one of the rookies girlfriends was due at the end of the month. she makes the mental note to get with mia and subtly get her favorite flavor cake before the sound of jack’s familiar laugh cutting through the arena draws her back to reality.

she tilts her head to the side and watches as they walk in as a unit. all in their forties now, but she still saw the twenty-somethings that she had fallen in love with all of those years ago. while luke and jack were deep in conversation about something, quinn was trailing behind with his phone to his ear. she had heard him mention something about a leadership meeting and she wasn’t immune to the ramblings around the league. at forty-five, quinn was ancient in the league and it wasn’t a matter of if he was going to retire anymore, but when he was going to hang up his c for good.

“angel,” jack grins as he breaks off from luke and moves to the aisle in front of the one. he leans over the seat and presses his lips to hers not once, but twice before looking onto the ice for his namesake, “how’s our girl?”

“tolliver’s told her to give the other girls a chance twice already,” she pauses so that luke can kiss her before quinn ends his call and follows behind his brothers. with luke and quinn taking up the space beside her, jack sits in front and angles his body so he can still contribute, “how was practice?”

“brutal,” luke groans, “‘m gonna need back scratches tonight-”

“it’s my night,” quinn says quickly, almost gruffly, the wrinkles by his eyes becoming more pronounced as he rests his elbows on his knees to look at his youngest brother almost daring him to challenge their system.

“where’s kq?” luke asks to change subject, hooking his big hand around angel’s knee and she lets him pull her leg over his own just like he did when they were in college. she angles her body towards him and hums, choosing to stare out onto the ice instead, “angel-”

“cut the shit,” quinn, freshly 45 and still drool-worthy if you asked angel, calls from her other side. a pinch to her thigh (a habit not forgotten in their nineteen years together) has her looking at the man with a sharp look, “where’d she go?”

“she… went to dinner with a friend,” angel had never been a good liar, especially to the men who knew her better than the back of their own hands. she grabs onto luke’s hand and rubs her finger over the angel wings that were tattooed on his ring finger, silently praying the coach rollover would forget that there was supposed to be an hour of practice left and blow that stupid whistle, “who happens to be a boy-”

“wren is at dinner-”

“alone-“

“with a boy?”

“he was a nice kid when he came to the house!” she tries to defend the boy but she quickly realizes her mistake when all of their eyes seem to glaze over, “she’s sixteen. you guys know that, right?”

“we were at her birthday party, yes,” jack answers in a monotone voice, “i think she was beside quinn when they blew out the candles on their birthday muffins that morning, but i may have to go watch the video to make sure my memory is correct.”

“no, you’re right,” quinn answers quickly, “this boy has been to our house?”

“she’s sixteen,” she tries to emphasize once again.

“is this like,” jack waves his hand around in the air, “a thing?”

“do i think that they’ll be married come january? no, but they’re a cute, little high school something. i don’t know if they’ve put a label on it, honest, but he’s been keeping her company since she can’t practice right now. she goes to his games-”

“god, an athlete. i don’t know what’s worse, a boy or an athlete,” luke lets out.

“how do you think my mom felt when i brought you home and then brought your brothers home less than a year later?” angel quirks an eyebrow and that sparks something else within them.

“i-” jack seems to be careful with his words, “it’s just one, right,”

she doesn’t even try to hide her laugh, tucking her face into luke’s shoulder. it takes her a minute to collect herself before she answers, “yes honey, it’s just one boy.”

“we would support her if she was, y’know, like us. we aren’t hypocrites,” quinn tries to assure the woman and his brothers nod along, “but i wasn’t prepared for one boy, i don’t know if i could handle multiple.”

“don’t worry, quinny. if my parents are ever unexpectedly in the livingroom, just know that they are about to coach all of you on how to overcome the shock of it all,” angel rolls her eyes and finally relaxes in her seat.

“she’s not on birth control, is she?” jack questions and it’s no secret what he’s actually asking. angel gently shoved her foot into his shoulder and he winces, “it’s not fair that you get to know all of these things before we do.”

“you wouldn’t survive if you knew half of the things that i did. now watch your daughter practice.”

the four of them settle into a quiet then, focusing on the 43 darting around the ice with a brunette braid poking out of her helmet. by the way all of their faces are set in a hard line for the rest of the practice, angel doesn’t even want to think about how it’s going to be when they find about drew’s boyfriend that he’s been seeing since february.

baby steps.

[bitchinbarzal]

missing you, quietly — luca fantilli

warnings; mentions of death & suicide. read at your own discretion.

-

Nobody really remembers what happened that night. They were up by three in the second period, everyone was happy.

Someone, an officer administrator came out onto the bench and called over coach. He walked off and spoke to her before he returned, his face was white.

Nolan noted the whispers of the staff and he looked concerned but before he could ask what was going on, Naurato called the officials over.

They huddled up and mumbled to each other before the officials announced

“The game has been stopped per request of Michigan, all remaining minutes will be played after a period break”

Nobody knew what was going on as they traipsed back to the locker room.

“Coach what’s going on?”

He stood in the middle of the room and cleared his throat “We were just contacted by a member of campus police. A student has been killed on her way here this evening by a drunk driver”

There were immediate mumblings of who it was.

Brandon turned to Ethan who dropped the stick in his hand and scrambled for his phone. The sudden movements caught everyone’s attention.

“Ethan, buddy don’t-“ “No! No, it’s not her!”

Coach watched him as Ethan called you again and again with no response. Tears streamed down his face and coach sighed

“The student who was killed this evening was y/n”

Everyone walked to console Ethan while Luca sat in his stall, mouth opened and heart beating at what felt like a million miles a minute.

They never went back out to play. Michigan forfeited the game.

The days and weeks following your death were nothing short of painful and silent.

Ethan went home to be with his family in this time but ultimately it was decided the Edwards would hold a funeral for you in Michigan, that’s where you felt at home.

Luca didn’t talk much to anyone. Adam had made comment about it once or twice but their mom simply said “Luca’s an empathetic boy, Adam he’s probably just feeling sorry for his teammate”

He wasn’t. He was heartbroken over the death of the love of his life.

Luca attended the funeral service and sat in the back row, waiting until everyone had left to then approach the front and mumble through his tears

“I miss you, so freaking much baby”

He consoled Ethan on occasions, listening to him tell everyone nobody knew what it was like to be this upset. While Luca hadn’t lost a twin and he wouldn’t know that feeling, he so desperately wanted to shout out how he did know the sadness because he was sad too!

He didn’t. He stayed quiet.

Luca thought that by three months past your death, it was all over. He didn’t have to bite his tongue during commemorations of your life.

That was until the team were suiting up for practice one Wednesday morning.

"how you holding up, Eddy?"

Ethan shrugs "My moms still hysterical everyday but the police dropped off her phone to me on my way here" he says, waving your iphone around in his hand.

"You look at it?" Mark asks, slipping his jersey on.

"Nah, I don't know her password"

"It's you guys' birthday" is all mark replies, earning a skeptical look from Ethan but it works and Mark smiles

"She always let me use her phone for the aux in the car'

Ethan stands and scrolls through your phone. Your background was a picture of you and him on his draft day, the devils jersey in your hand while you looked so proud.

A few texts from friends and family members gone unread; mom, dad, even one from him he sent late the night you died begging you to call him and say it wasn't true.

then he landed on a text thread from 'my love

he clicked on it, eyebrows furrowed. There were messages sent since you died.

call me, tell me it isn't true

baby please, please be ok

I love you, come home

There were more he read through, still no idea who this person was. He clicked on the contact and dropped the phone, causing everyone to look over at him.

Ethan looked up, eyes scanning the locker room until they landed on who he'd been looking for.

"You son of a bitch! You were fucking my sister!"

Ethan storms across the room, out to hurt someone when he was held back by Adam, Luke and Mark

"Ethan stop, he was not!" Adam yells.

Luca gulps "Yeah... I was"

Everyone stared at him, he felt as if the walls were closing in on his chest.

Adam steps forward, protecting his big brother “Back off Edwards… I mean it”

Ethan scoffs “You were seriously fucking my sister? Dude what the fuck is wrong-“

“I was not! I wasn’t just- Jesus, fuck Ethan she’s dead stop being so fucking vulgar!” Luca screams, throwing his helmet across the room.

The rest of the boys take a few steps back.

“I wasn’t just fucking her, she’s not some puck bunny you dick! She was my girlfriend!”

Ethan scoffs “no, she would’ve told me”

“No, she didn’t want to because she was scared of how you’d react… clearly she was right!” Luca snaps, shoving past him and leaving the locker room.

Ethan stands with his chest heaving still “Can you believe him?”

Nobody speaks until Johnny stands up “You didn’t hear him Eddy, he screamed and cried that night I thought he was actually going to be sick and he couldn’t breath”

Ethan’s glare snaps to him “So you knew?”

“y/n used to tell you she was coming to study with me but instead they’d go out together” Johnny sighs “She liked him a lot and she didn’t wanna tell you because she was scared it would hurt the team”

Ethan doesn’t respond

“Luca tried to kill himself when you went back to Alberta”

At that, Adam’s head snaps to his teammate and Nolan goes to speak when Johnny continues “I found him real early in the morning with way too many pills and he was just scared and alone, he grieved her death for far too long all alone”

“Ethan, you aren’t the only one who was hurt when she died don’t be so hard on him, he’s already beating himself up too much already”

Luca didn’t speak to anyone for the following days, Adam had left food for him and his mom tried calling along with Nolan but he didn’t talk to anyone.

Ethan sat with your phone watching as the notifications came in from Luca, texts confiding in you as if you were on the other end still. It was when Ethan read the text;

you’re the love of my life, I’m feeling pretty lost without you.

That he knew, Luca had been suffering in silence.

Saturday came and the team were facing off against Ohio state for the first time since the night you died.

The teams had prepared a ceremonial jersey for Ethan to receive with your name and number on the other side. The girls team, your team were in the stands to watch too.

Luca was there early to avoid being in the room with Ethan.

By the time warmups had come and gone nobody had spoken to him. All a little concerned.

When the puck was ready to be dropped the lights dimmed and the announcer read

“Three months ago, when these two teams last played we lost a member of our Michigan family — y/n was a star hockey player, daughter, student and twin to one of our own. Tonight we gift her jersey to her twin brother, Ethan. To honour her by the people who love her most”

Ethan skated forward to collect the jersey and thanked those who gave him it. He placed it on the bench and the game got underway.

You were seemingly controlling the score for the team that evening because when the game finished 7-2 everyone said

“Hey look, seventy-two joined us this evening!”

Luca smiled, headed back to the locker room remembering back to you telling him how you got your number as you were all but one minute older than Ethan so you had a number one before him.

He was snapped out of his thoughts when he walked back to his Stall only to find a maize jersey staring back at him.

Edwards

72

Luca didn’t speak, his fingers grazed the number before he looked back to Ethan, who was already staring at him with a soft smile.

It wasn’t much and nothing was going to fix this but it would be a little better now Luca didn’t have to miss you quietly.

[almostwisegalaxy]

The glory

Ha Do Young x reader

Part 2

Part1:

Following this meeting with Ha Do Young, I purposely bumped into him two or three times. During our discussions, I slipped in the information that the clinic in which I worked specializes in genetic research and analysis. Chatting with this man is entertaining every time, but in order to follow through on Dong Eun's revenge and mine as well, I must pursue our plan.

______________

Today, I was called to school or teacher Dong Eun to check if the children had not been contaminated by rubella, which unfortunately caught one of the little ones.

So I went to the school infirmary to examine the children one by one. During this, I was able to meet little Ye-sol. A cute little girl, but when you know who her mother is, you start to be suspicious. Appearances are very often deceiving and I know that better than anyone.

I had to reassure them about the disease they are all afraid of getting and she was no exception.

"Ma'am, you're sure we're not ill, are you?"

“After the results, I will know more about everyone's condition and what drugs to prescribe okay”

"But my mum says getting sick is ugly and only for the weak. If I'm sick does that mean I'm weak then? And my mum won't love me like she used to?"

Park yeon jin what is this sordid mentality you instill in such a young child

"Getting sick isn't a good thing in itself, but that doesn't mean you're weak or ugly. It happens to everyone at some point. And it's to avoid that that you owe a lot eat fruits and vegetables

What a lie. Even I hate vegetables, but at the time I didn't know what else to say

" Okay "

So I leave it to continue my work and once finished, I transfer the samples to the lab. I should have the results in two to three hours no more.

__________

Ha Do Young pov

I came to pick up my daughter following a call from her school regarding the health of the children. I pace the corridors and live in his class and I knock. Once twice, still no answer, so I decide to enter.

"You have nothing to fear. The children are all in good health"

I did not expect to see these two people together.

"Miss Yu?" I said interrupting them.

"Mr. Ha, what are you doing here?"

"I can return the question to you. I came to pick up my daughter"

" Okay"

"With that, Miss Moon, I'm leaving you. I'm going to the hospital," she said to Miss Moon. She then slips away, leaving us alone

"Ye-sol isn't here. She's in the canteen with her classmates-"

"How do you know Miss Yu?"

"She came at the request of the director to make sure that the children had not been infected with chicken pox like one of their classmates. But you must already know that"

"Yes, I meant personally"

"Why do you think I would know her outside of work?"

"Perhaps because you are trying to destroy my wife?"

"Oh, please. Your wife is the navel of the world"

"From your world here" I say as I leave the room

Y/n pov

After returning to the clinic, I made my report and took my bag to my son Chin-eunji's hospital. My Sunshine . My only support other than Dong Eun. I hurry to walk because his exit time has passed by 10 minutes, he must be wondering where I am.

When I finally arrive, it starts to rain. Fortunately, I always have an umbrella and its raincoat on me. I have to work harder to be able to buy us a car. I see him standing in front of his class

"Chin!"

"Mom" he said running towards me

"How was school today, baby?"

"Yes, it was nice"

"Okay, put on your sweater and raincoat so we can wait for the bus in front of the school"

" Yes mom"

While waiting for the bus, the small downpour began to turn into a storm. Park yeon jin even to predict the weather is not good at you. Anyway, I hope this bus arrives soon. At this time a car parks right at our feet and the driver lowers the window on the passenger side.

"Can I drop you off somewhere?"

" It's nice of you Mr Ha, but my son and I are waiting for the bus"

“Given the storm that is coming, it is not likely to happen”

No, my plans for him must in no way include chin

"I wouldn't want to bother you and make your daughter uncomfortable"

"You don't bother me at all" interrupted Ye-sol.

His father then leaves me a look of contentment. I look at my son who is clinging to my leg and shivering with cold.

"Okay" I get chin up in the back to the side of ye-sol and I get up in the front

" Where are we going ? "

I tell him the address and he starts the car. For a good 10 minutes, the only voices that resonate are those of the children. Ye-sol tries to make conversation with Chin who answers him as best he can. Not that he is snobby, on the contrary, it is very difficult to find his words in front of people he does not know. But I see he's making an effort not to look rude. My little chick.

"It's raining heavily...... Do you like the rain more or the good weather?"

"Wouldn't that be a failed attempt to strike up a conversation?"

"Might be fine. I didn't want to let the kids be the only ones talking."

"Hmm, you just.....I prefer dark, cloudy weather"

"Can I ask you why?"

Because my burn itches less

"It's always good for a little nap"

"I see, and uh, how long have you been, doctor?"

"For three years now"

"And you seem to like it a lot"

"You can't imagine how much. Being able to know what is going on in the human body is fascinating. How the blood circulates, how illness is set up and the healing process, doing the calculations necessary to know what dose the doctor should give for this specific patient and the-oh sorry, I went too far"

"No, don't worry. It's good to see that some people can still be happy talking about a job they've been doing for years."

"I find that your wife is just as much. Every day, she does her job with mice"

" Yes of course......."

"I didn't mean to talk about your married life. Excuse me"

"It's okay, you didn't do it on purpose"

"Yeah, do I sometimes do that when I'm nervous?

"Because you're nervous? Will you make me feel uncomfortable?"

"Oh no, it's quite the opposite. I even think that you have a gift for putting people in trust because since we've been together there's been no awkwardness."

"Glad to hear that," he said, giving me a half-mouse-accompanied look. Y/n think revenge plan not q plan. Let's get out of here. Fast

"Uh, we've arrived, you can stop in front of the building"

Once out of the vehicle with my Son, I lower myself to the height of the car

"Thanks again for your help" I said giving her a smile.

"You're welcome. See you next time Miss Yu" and he left

"Mom, can we go home?"

"Yeah of course honey"

Part3:

[omarscurls]

Wilhelm finds the red shirt…

This was supposed to be about Wille finding his shirt in Simon’s room and just like being fluff in general

I’ve literally had this idea in my head since s2 premiered, and been writing since then lmao

It has taken me unbelievably long to write this short piece of fluffy nothingness

TWs: none really? Hints or signs of a panic attack and anxiety, August is mentioned, otherwise I don’t think there’s any

A/N look like this because my mind is weird and it’s fun to comment as I write

Idk what this is but enjoy! :)

Everything in Wille’s mind went blurry the second the cameras were turned off. He registers that the choir behind him has started to move, that the crowd watching him is whispering and not even hiding the looks they’re giving him, that the headmaster seems to be frozen where she’s sitting and that his mom, the queen, is walking towards him with determined steps and an unreadable face.

But he can also see that Boris is smiling at him proudly from where he’s sitting, that August who has stood up from his seat and is now talking to Nils while looking like he just swallowed a lemon, that Felice and Madison are both waving and smiling at him.

He finds comfort in all of these things, but it isn’t quite enough to stop his head from spinning and vision from going blurry. He once again realises his mom is trying to reach him and he starts feeling the panic rise in his chest and he desperately look’s around for a place to hide, run, anything, but everyone is coming closer and there’s so much noise and angry voices and people trying to reach him and he can’t quite see and…

There’s a hand in his. Simon’s hand, his mind helpfully tells him. Simon who is now desperately trying to pull him away from the chaos that is happening around them.

Wille doesn’t quite know how but they end up back in his room. He silently watches as Simon pulls the curtains shut and checks that the door is locked. Twice.

Then Simon turns to Wille. They stare at each other for just a second before they both go “Are you ok?”. Simon lets out a breathy laugh and says “yes, yes” while Wille pulls him close. “Are you ok?” Simon asks again, a bit muffled since his face is now hidden in the crook of Wille’s neck.

Wille thinks for a second. Because no, no he’s not ok. His heart is beating too fast and it still feels like he can’t get enough air into his lungs. But Simon is right here with him and having told everyone the truth doesn’t make him as anxious as it should. “Maybe, I think so” he finally responds.

Wille can feel Simon wrap his arms even tighter around him and he’s pretty sure Simon is smiling against his neck. He can feel his own heartbeat slow down little by little as he breathes in the smell of Simon’s hair.

“We are ok” Simon whispers to him, over and over again. Wille doesn’t know which one of them he is trying to convince, probably both. Either way, it helps.

Why tf are they at Wille’s? The whole point of this was for them to go to Simon’s, I’m getting carried away lol

“I love you” Wille whispers back a couple of minutes later, or maybe an hour, he doesn’t really know. It also doesn’t really matter. What matters is that he can somewhat breathe normally again and that Simon is still hugging him, gently rocking them back and forth.

“I love you too” Simon says, pulling away a little, so that he can look into Wille’s eyes. They both smile.

And then, finally, they kiss. Because after all, they’re just teenagers. Who are a little bit in love. And sometimes a little bit of casually making out is the best way to forget about the rest of the world.

They are rudely interrupted by the sound of a phone ringing. It’s Wilhelm’s. He doesn’t want to answer it, he can’t, really, right now.

But he doesn’t have to because Simon slips his hand into Wille’s pocket and grabs his phone. Declines the call and turns it off. Wille doesn’t even get the chance to see who’s calling.

Is this the fluffiest mess if ever written? Maybe

“Do you want to sleep at mine tonight?” Simon asks him after giving the phone back to Wilhelm, now with a determined look on his face.

“Please” Wille answers immediately, without hesitation. He doesn’t really know how that’s supposed to work though, because there’s most likely someone outside of his door just waiting to grab him and take him to the castle, or to his mom, probably to talk, or something.

But somehow they manage to get out, with some help from Felice and Madison. Wilhelm decides to just not look behind him as they hurriedly walk towards the bus station. He focuses on the feeling of Simon’s hand in his and blurs out everything else.

Yes this is me getting through not having written anything for weeks bc I didn’t know how to get them out of there whoops lol

Simon’s mom hugs them both tightly as soon as they walk inside the door and once again Wilhelm feels like he can breathe a tiny bit more freely.

After greeting Linda they head off to Simon’s room, where they once again make sure the window is locked and the curtains shut.

Is that even the right way to say that lol

He looks around for a bit, touches stuff that has been added since he was there last. He and Simon talk, mostly nonsense, very obviously avoiding the fact that the entire world is probably looking for them right now. But it’s comfortable. Wille feels safer than he has in a long time.

The sit at the end of Simon’s bed. Simon’s fingers are running through Wille’s hair as he rests his head against Simon’s shoulder. For the first time since the the cameras were turned off, Wille can’t feel his pulse racing. Simon tells him as much: �� are you more ok now? It seems better” “I think I am” he answers. He realises that’s true.

There’s a faint thought that he should be worried about something but it’s in the back of his head and it doesn’t seem impossible right now. Not when Simon is right there, feeling so real. His fingers in Wille’s hair is the only thing that seems to make any sense in Wille’s head at the moment.

See what I did there? “All the people are fake… but I like you and that’s not fake…” Simon is real :,)

Simon let’s his hands wander, one stopping on the prince’s chest, right on his heart. “At least your heartbeat is ok again” he mumbles, as he gently scratches at Wille’s shirt in the same spot, seeming to need something to hold on to.

The let their hands wander, talk for a bit, share a couple of innocent kisses, both of them being too exhausted to make them lead to something else.

It’s when Simon’s head, that’s now resting against Wille’s shoulder, start to become heavier, and Wille muffles another yawn with the sleeve of his hoodie, he suggests they go to bed. Simon doesn’t even really know what time it is, or if anyone has tried to reach them, but agrees since they both seem exhausted enough to fall asleep sitting up against the wall.

As Simon leaves to get some stuff for Wille and to say goo night to his mom, Wille gets up from the bed too. He changes into the T-shirt Simon threw at him to wear as pyjamas, and looks around the room again.

Why tf is nothing like, happening lmao

Simon did clearly not make his bed this morning so Wille doesn’t think he’ll mind is he just sits down and rests his eyes for a little while.

Ooooo finally? Maybe

As he moves the pillows around just a bit he sees something red sticking out from underneath one of them. Weird. He pulls out the piece of fabric and is puzzled for a second before he realises. That’s his shirt. The one he thought he lost months ago. In Simon’s bed.

He’s about to start thinking about what that means when Simon comes back. He seems to be in the middle of a sentence when he realises what Wille is doing and as his eyes land on the shirt in Wille’s hands, he freezes completely.

“I-“ he starts. “I was going to give it back…” “I swear!” “I didn’t steal it it was just that…” “I- you- the headmaster-“ Simon’s brain doesn’t seem to be functioning properly.

Wille just giggles: “Hey, it’s ok, I don’t mind, like, at all”. That’s makes Simon unfreeze again and stumble right into Wille, trying to hide his embarrassment in the prince’s shirt.

Said Prince just wraps his arms around Simon, who is very much clinging to him but still refusing to show his face. “I just want to know how you got it” Wille ends up saying.

As they move into bed Simon tells Wille how he got his hands on the shirt and how he completely forgot to give it back.

They forget about it, start talking about other things, kiss a little, talk some more, while they cuddle up under the covers. It’s not until they’re in the dark, just about to fall asleep, bodies tangled together until they can’t really tell where Simon ends and Wille begins, that Wille whispers: “how come the shirt was in your bed though? Under you pillow?” He barely has time to finish the sentence before Simon slaps a hand over the prince’s mouth and groans, while hiding underneath the blanket.

They’ll be ok.

Thank you so much for reading!! Any thoughts on this/feedback is very much appreciated so please leave a comment :)))

[iboatedhere]

“Now, everyone knows the navel, but the real star of the orange family is the cara cara,” Owen says as he gestures to the platter of perfectly sliced orange wedges on the table in front of him. “It’s sweet, and doesn’t have too many seeds….like a cross between a naval and a blood orange. Go ahead,” he says as he pushes the tray forward. “Take one. I brought plenty of extra since I’m betting they’re going to go quickly.”

TK rolls his eyes then smiles at one of Jonah’s teammates who shyly asks him for a bottle of organic, low sugar apple juice.

It’s his week to bring refreshments to the game, and he was happy for the help when his father offered, but so far, all Owen has been doing is flirting with mom’s over orange slices while TK fights for his life, trying to remember which kid is allergic to red dye #40 and who can’t have processed wheat products.

“I used to eat these all the time when I was growing up in Santa Monica,” Owen continues, “there used to be a tree in our backyard.”

“You’re from California?” One of the mother’s asks as she pushes her hair behind her ear.

Owen nods. “California, and then I moved to New York City….spent that first summer as a lifeguard in the Hamptons…it’s where I realized I wanted to be a firefighter, that that was my calling.”

“A lifeguard to a firefighter, you’ve been a hero your whole life.”

TK groans as his father puffs out his chest.

“Well,” Owen says, “I wouldn’t say that.”

“I would,” another woman says. “TK, you never mentioned how interesting your father was.”

“Yeah, he’s really interesting,” TK says, “I think the most interesting things about him are that he’s nearly sixty and he’s been divorced twice.”

The smiles slowly slip from their faces as they make their excuses to head back to the bleachers.

“Thanks a lot,” Owen says and TK rolls his eyes. “What? You’re the only one that’s allowed to find love at the little league game?”

“You are not finding love with those women.”

“You don’t know that.”

“No, dad, you misunderstood. You. Are not. Finding love. With those women.”

“Why not?”

“They’re too young for you.”

“They’re not that much younger.”

“I’m pretty sure at least two of them are younger than me.”

Owen looks like he’s about to argue before he presses his lips together into a thin line and winces.

“Yeah,” TK says.

“Well, anyway, this is still fun. We should really invite the 126 to come to a game. I’m surprised you haven’t already.”

“Jonah wouldn’t like that. They’d be loud and he doesn’t even like it when I cheer for him like that. Which reminds me, you have to be cool. Don’t go crazy, don’t storm the field if you don’t agree with a call.”

“I would never do that.”

“The softball game doesn’t ring a bell? I guess getting punched in the face might mess with your memory.”

“That was an AFD-APD softball game against adults, not a child’s game. Plus O’Brien was being a—.” He cuts himself off as a couple of kids run by the table. “Butthead.”

TK snorts. “Nice.”

“Maybe we could have a cookout or something once the season ends. I could fire up the grill, you can invite Carlos and his niece.”

“Yeah,” TK says quickly, “maybe, I don’t know.”

“You know they miss you, right? They ask me about you because you don’t always text back.”

“I’m busy, dad. There’s a six year old that lives with me that needs me. I can’t spend my day sending cat memes back and forth.”

“I don’t think they expect you to do that.”

“I see Judd, sometimes. And Grace. And Mateo when we come over to hang out with Buttercup.”

“Okay,” Owen says. “All right.”

“I miss them,” TK says. “But I don’t know how to be around them right now, not after what I did.”

“You didn’t do anything, TK.”

“What I almost did. What I was going to do. How can they trust me?”

“They love you, that grants you some grace.”

“That’s unprofessional.”

“We’re a family,” Owen says as he squeezes TK’s shoulder. “We’re bound to be a little unprofessional from time to time.”

TK nods. “I’ll think about it.”

“Good,” Owen says. “We’re all here for you. We’re all on your side.”

TK nods as Jo suddenly calls his name.

“TK!” She calls, limping up to him with Carlos following behind, holding the first aid kit. “TK I need you!”

“What happened?” TK asks as he gets to his feet.

“She fell off the bench,” Carlos says, “even after I warned her to get down because I knew that would happen.”

“Don’t be mean to me,” Jo says with a stomp of her good leg. “I’m hurt.”

“It’s a scraped knee,” Carlos tells her. “I could put a bandaid on it for you.”

“I want TK to do it. He’s the paramedic.”

“Can’t argue with that,” TK says as he helps Jo onto the chair he vacated, and takes the first aid kit from Carlos with a wink. “Let’s get you fixed up.”

[nerd-at-sea5]

'i spent my teen in rage, spiralin' in silence' (ao3 link)

title from 'seventeen going under' by sam fender - pt 2 here, pt 3 here

van and nat grow up together, they know one another better than anyone else on the team bar maybe jackie and shauna. however as they grow up, new situations and feeling arise. they don’t want to leave each other, in fact maybe they’re terrified to do so, this isn’t a healing friendships fic. this is how even when everything is set up for them to fall apart, the strings of love that have tied them together since childhood become in unbreakable.

a myriad of snippets showing how once they bonded, there way no way they would let go. contains; shitty dads, a lot of lesbianism, natalie decks someone (twice) (van gets a good hit in as well), coach ben contemplating why he became a coach in the first place, van dosent know how to stop laughing during serious situations, tai is super confused a lot of the time, and laura lee might be the most mentally stable out of all of them (lottie has stopped disagreeing due to recent events)

van uses they/them bc i do and i say so >:) (she/they nat that may become they/them nat in later fics but who knows)

cw - drinking/drugs, suicide ideation/attempt, self harm, guns, slurs, descriptions of gore, dead body(ies), attempted sexual assault

wilderness scenes takes place somewhere in the middle of s1e7 and s1e10 (laura lee is alive i love her) pov switching more than....i can't come up with a pun here, lots of pov swaps, also. nat's jewish <3 (to me) and that shows up here, don't like it-don't read it.

they're 4 years old when they meet. just about the age where they can sit on the couch and draw while their moms get high outside (that's the real reason natalie's over, if they're being honest).

her mother knocks on the door, and a small redhead peaks out from behind their mother's legs, a small hand with an even smaller wave, but natalie scatorccio is nothing if not energetic, eager to make the friends she’s never had in preschool, "hi! i'm natalie!" she practically runs into the house, not hearing their mother's sigh, the "she's always like this, little spaztic." (after all, they've been hearing it every other day) and the redhead breaks into a grin, missing tooth from running into the doorframe on display, "nat-lee?" "that's what my daddy calls me, natty! you can do it too, i don't mind!" "i'm vanessa." their smile wavers, and natalie scrunches her face up, "can i call you van?"

and when van's face splits into a massive smile, they nod, grabbing the other's hand and racing into their room to show off their cars.

---------

they're 8 years old when van's grandpa dies. nat dosen't fully get what it means-funerals, she knows death-but she knows that van came to school with teary eyes and said that they want her to be there.

that week in sunday school, they learn the mourners kaddish (natalie finds it painfully situational).

she has to walk herself to van's house because her dad is drunk and yelling at their mom when they sneak out the front door, dressed in an old faded black t-shirt and black jeans that they hoped would be appropriate.

when they get to the palmer's house, the door is open, and there's way too many people for natalie to be comfortable with, so she shakes out her hands to get rid of the weird feeling, and runs up to van's room as fast as she can.

"van?" they're sitting on their bed, tears slipping down their face, a black lump of fabric laying on their bed. "why aren't you dressed?"

"my...my mom said i hafta-" they cough, "to wear a dress. i don’t wanna. i don’t-i dunno why, i just don’t.”

nat considers this, thinking long and hard for an eight year old, and then firmly decides that-"that's stupid. here, take my clothes, we can swap." and proceeds to pull off their shirt and pants, handing it to van, who's teary face manages a smile, "thanks natty." the two pause, holding each others clothes, before van laughs, a missing tooth grin "i like your clothes."

natalie grins back, pulling the dress over their head, "i don't like this very much, it's scratchy. i can't run." she pauses, shivers at the texture, nerves crossing over van's face, "i can suck it up. just for you."

the hug van wraps her in is worth an uncomfortable dress, "i love you." "i love you too, van."

---------

van is 12 years old when they decide to join soccer.

and since they know nat needs a reason to leave the house, they manage to convince her to join.

"i am seriously going to punch you if you make me do this."

"you'd punch me no matter what, c'mon natty, it'll be fun!"

even with the complaints, van still watches while nat-normally doing a hundred things at once-is completely focused on a single task.

they find themselves face to face with a taller girl, her curly black hair pulled back as she sprints forward, tapping the ball back and forth as she lines up a shot on goal, twenty feet away, then fifteen, then ten, then-

she kicks, and van throws their small body harder than ever before, slamming their hand into the ball and curling inward onto themself, landing on the grass with a thud.

they pop up, grinning like a madman, while nat jumps up and down, dark hair falling in her eyes as she cheers, van matches, colliding with her.

the curly haired girl sticks out a hand, "taissa turner, that was a good save."

van's to busy wondering why their mouth stopped working as they spit out, "i'm vanes-van. van palmer, thanks." to notice nat's face has dropped, fear coating her eyes as van clasps taissa's hand, smiling.

"nice to meet you," it's practiced, van notes-the way taissa turns to nat and extends the same hand, nat's bad at keeping friends, good at making them. "natalie scatorccio." the kindness in their voice is forced only to van.

van snorts as taissa's eyes widen-nat always manages to throw people off by introducing herself as 'natalie'. (something about how it sounds fancier than she is, or at least that what jackie jokes).

they elbow her, "they go by nat, she's just a dick. natty, stop being a dick." and taissa's face molds back into the smile, giggling-only van can hear nat's "never, i'm a dick expert." van's heart jumping to their throat before they pinch her. (nat seems to warm up to taissa as the days go on)

---------

nat's 14 when she gets high for the first time.

jackie taylor was having a team party, and in a moment of pure insanity, nat stole her dad's weed.

they pulled van aside a little after everyone was settled, "i might have fucked up."

"is this a 'van i need you to cover for me while i put something i stole back' or a 'van i need you to hide a body' kind of 'i fucked up'?"

nat laughs, "no, dumbass, i stole my dad's pot." van's face drops, "no fucking way."

but she pulls it out, a few joints already made that hopefully won't end that badly for her, and all it takes is a glance back at the rest of the team before the two are running out to jackie's tire swing (the one shauna shipman broke her arm on last year). and she's grabbing the lighter from her pocket.

being high is funny. everything seems a little weirder, but nat kind of likes it, it makes them feel calm-their brain constantly racing through everything, but this...natalie can hear their own thoughts for the first time in, well, ever.

she's not sure she likes it, she dosen't like a lot of things, their dad, most classes at school....natalie isn't sure she even likes most people.

van's the exception. van's always been there. van'll always be there.

they knock into van's shoulder, who's been staring at the windows for the past twenty minutes.

"dude, you good?"

"i-uh." van's voice is lodged in their throat, and natalie blinks a few times before turning over, a silent "are you ok?" written on her face.

"natty...nat. nat, i like girls."

nat blinks again, "who doesn't?"

"no-nat." and she doesn't get it, doesn't everyone like girls? like the way their smiles are always so much softer than boys? like the way on the rare occasion she lets them, they hold her so much lighter? "i like girls how you like boys."

"i don't like boys." "natalie!"

she's pissed off now, "vanessa!" and they almost fall as they clamor off the tire swing, "you fucking idiot-i'm telling you i want to kiss girls, not that i don't think boys are fun to hangout with!" van is practically tearing up, and with a start, natalie realizes exactly what they were trying to do, "oh. oh shit-"

van lets out a shaky breath, and nat's brain starts racing again, overcoming the haze from the weed.

"that's not...that's not something everyone wants?" her own voice sounds much to small in her head, muted, like she’s speaking from behind glass, and even smaller when van shakes their head.

"no. it's not."

she swallows hard, "then i guess that makes two of us."

---------

when van is 15 years old, they see a dead body for the first time.

after weeks of hyping themself up, and nat teasing them in class, they managed to get their shit together enough to ask taissa if she'd like to see a movie together (as friends. duh.)

it ends up being beetlejuice, back in theaters for some reason or another, not that van cares-nat showed up at their house earlier-walking back to her house with kevyn tan, and handed van 20$ with a shady grin that van just knows means she did not get this safely or intelligently. (nat also threw a condom at them. van threw a book in return.)

and taissa said yes, but she's choosing the movie. van could care less what they saw.

so they paied for popcorn and soda and candy, feeling all floaty-like whenever they get high with nat. granted, van didn't like being high that much, it was a once every other month kind of thing for them.

the theater is dark, and van's only half paying attention to the movie-taissa keeps jolting on all the cheep jump scares, eventually she hands van the popcorn, pushing their hair back to whisper in their ear-ignoring or just not seeing how van's entire body stilled-"please keep this i think i'll tip it over."

when not five minutes later taissa grabs van's hand, and van is silently thanking whatever god there is that this theater is dark because oh my actual fucking god.

on their way out they tease her for it, "really, the silly demon?" "shut up, he's kind of scary!" "no, tai. he's really not-" and if tai's blushing even a little...van's smiling harder than they ever thought possible.

that's when the sirens go off, the ambulance speeding down the street, past the houses and down the road to....

"fuck."

taissa looks confused, van can feel panic invading their bones, their brain jumping to the worst conclusion-it's not her. a bunch of people live there. the trailer park always has the cops there for one reason or another.

she's fine, she's fine-kevyn tan is outside the liquor store breathing like he's just run a mile, terror coating his face.

"fuck, fuck-taissa-i'm so sorry, i have to go, here-" they hand her the rest of the candy and another apology before springing as fast as they can after the ambulance, leaving taisssa confused and heartsick outside the theater.

van's heart nearly falls to their feet when they see a black tarp covering....someone. the grass is stained red when they get there, and a cop flings his arm out before van can run up the stairs.

"get off me!"

"hey, hey kid calm down-"

van wriggles until he lets go, and there's tears pouring down their face as they stare around wildly, "who-who is it? tell me, please!"

his face calms a little, "shane."

they collapse on the floor, sick relief flooding-she's ok. thank god they're ok. "where-where's nat. natalie, where is she?"

they can feel an arm pulling them up, "c'mere kiddo.”and he walks them to one of the cop cars.

van can see vera, tears steaming down her face and red on her hands, waving madly at the cops, van caught the words 'unexpected', 'spaz' and 'insane'. another cop standing next to a dark haired girl, silently staring at the black tarp with wide, shell-shocked eyes.

"NAT!" van stops themself before crashing into her, nat's touch reservations still holding prominent, before the taller collapses into van, sobbing uncontrollably into their shoulder.

the two sink to the floor, van holding onto their friend as tight as they could ever, they watch as the body is lifted to the ambulance, they don't turn away in time as the deputy or whoever the hell he is lifts the tarp and whistles.

van's eyes catch, shane's eye and half his fucking head gone, blown off, blood still dripping, flecks of brain matter. they swallow down the popcorn and fanta that threatens to arise, whispering into nat's hair, "what the fuck happened....?"

---------

nat is 16 when she starts to slip away from the person van's known basically their entire life.

they're still there when van calls them at 3am because they're shaking so hard they can't move, or when they come to school with scrapes on their face from the bottle their mom threw the night before, she still patches them up in the locker room with soft hands and a brightly colored band aid.

natalie's always there, but it's becoming less and less.....natalie.

they get into a fight, their first real one in possibly ever, and when nat goes home she nearly puts her fist through the wall because of it. it wasn't even a real fight, it was pathetic.

it's been six months-six months of ignoring the increased whispers in the halls, six months of passing her classes only because the teachers feel bad, six months of kevyn and charlie treating her like she's glass.

six months of working themself so hard at soccer that when nat gets home she doesn't even have the energy to think.

it's better than the other alternatives she's tried. the ones that leave white lines on pale skin, and make showering sting.

they liked the blonde. it changed during the first month, van helped-neither of them could smell for a week after, but she liked it. it felt safer than the others, but still stung for a little bit when it was setting.

they win their first game of the season, natalie's pass to taissa passing smoothly through the other team members legs, taissa sprinting up and tapping it to lottie who sends the ball sailing over the goalie's head and into the corner of the net.

they cheer their way back into the locker room, and a warm sense of pride spreads through nat's chest for the first time in six months.

they're so happy that everything that's been pressing down feels like it's taken a break, left her mind, let them forget. it's floating away like a balloon, up up.....gone.

lottie mathews is holding onto their shoulders and shaking them as someone slams a tape into the player, and music starts blasting and natalie's grinning harder than she knew they could, blushing unnatrually hard at the attention from the tall girl (lottie’s always loved dancing with natalie, why does it feels so weird this time?)

van's arm is looping around their shoulders, nat's hands hooking around their waist.

they feel like a kid. like when they'd climb as high as she could in the trees and it felt like no one would ever be as high, that the world was wherever she could see-nothing else mattered.

"we fuckin' did it natty, we fuckin' did it!!"

and everything comes crashing, slamming back onto her. pinning their lungs and holding them underwater, dousing the flame with gallons of water with every click of the lighter.

images flick through her head like a screwed up slide show and all natalie can see is her dad's body, her mother's hands and dress slowly overtaken.

she can't see anything else. she can smell the metallic tang and hear the ringing in their ears.

before they know what she's doing, van is pressed against a locker, natalie's hands holding down their wrists, misty's slammed a hand on the 'pause' button, laura lee's jaw wide open. shauna let’s out a soft ‘woah-’ and taissa freezes.

natalie's breathing hard, fighting to keep van's face in front of her, the echo is getting louder with each heartbeat.

"don't. call me that." they manage to force out, sounding much harder than they had wanted, it sounds mean, cold. maybe that's better.

"ever again."

and as they turn away, van's hands connecting with their back in a soft shove, not hard enough to do any damage, some hidden creature inside natalie's chest explodes out.

"what the fuck is your problem, nat?!"

"you!" she spins, stalking up to van, who's face contorts from confusion to defense, "you and that stupid fucking nickname! alright? so just shut the hell up about it!"

they stalk out of the locker room, not missing lottie's worried face or jackie's mutter of "jesus fuck, that girl's a spaz."

eventually they managed to not hit any walls, and insted found the boys at one of the football guy's houses, not that nat really enjoyed football boys, but it's free alcohol and a chance to forget everything she said, everything they didn't mean.

sitting on a windowsill with a shitty bottle of beer, their mind replaying every moment of it, the guilt coming back over and over.

she didn't know why she snapped, but they knew they had to say sorry, say sorry and fix this, somehow. van would get it, they always got it. nat rarely got mad at them, but they were always mad at someone. van was always mad at their mom. nat got it.

"hey, hey."

nat looked up, a boy in a letterman jacket with an annoyingly bright grin that made him look like the hot boy in every teen romcom movie that laura lee picked whenever it was her choice at movie night had his hand on top of the window, beer in hand. he was grinning directly down at her.

something about him made nat want to gag. it was probably his face. something else about him made nat want to run out of her own skin. also probably his face.

she nods in his direction before going back to staring out the window.

"what're you doing here all alone?"

"does it matter?"

he grinned again, and nat's hand instinctively went to her pocket, intending to close around the swiss army knife.

insted, the boys hand shot out and held her wrist in place, inches away from the knife.

"let go."

he leaned down, she could smell the beer on his breathe, could feel her own speeding up. she still had one arm.

"not until you give me a kiss."

"what the fuck, man? i don't even know you."

natalie twisted, intending to land a knee in his groin, but insted her back slammed painfully into the wall, and his entire body pressed against hers.

"i said let go, fucker!"

he laughed, and that thing that had exploded only hours before formed again, reared it's head up again-pulling out their free wrist from their back, and as the boy leaned impossibly closer, slammed into the side of his cheek.

"CRAZY FUCKING BITCH!" it came out with flecks of spit and blood, but she only pulled back again and struck him in the same place, the creature screaming in pride, again, again, again, again-

"NATALIE!"

the creature vanished, crawling back, away, hiding again inside of nat, the boy did the same, crawling to his feet and running into a new room, adjusting his pants as he did so.

nat turned, heart leaping into her throat as she saw lottie staring daggers in the direction of the boy, and then turning to give a soft smile at nat, "are you alright?"

"i-uh. mhm."

lottie gave her a funny look, and natalie had the strange feeling that her entire body was being x-rayed, lottie scanning through to see everything, read their entire person.

"you're bleeding."

she was right, nat's knuckles had split, it was barley anything, but lottie still took them by the hand and lead them into the bathroom.

"what happened?"

some part of natalie couldn't even attempt to lie to her. by the end of the story, however-lottie looked relived, "at least you're ok." she smiled, and natalie blinked.

"fuck."

lottie's smile wavered, "what?"

"nothing. why are you here?"

the taller girl shrugged, "van wanted to come but tai was busy so now i'm here."

natalie winced, weather from surprise or the soap and water lottie was gently rubbing over their knuckles, she didn't know.

"van's here?"

lottie nodded, "mhm. i can get them if you want, i think they'd like to talk to you."

nat blinked, trying to keep a straight face as her mind ran through outcome after outcome after outcome. what if van hated them? what if they never wanted to talk again?

"yeah. alright, whatever."

the other smiled, "i'm glad." and then bent down to kiss natalie's knuckles.

natalie froze, a weird sensation flooding through their entire body, landing in their chest and spreading out to her cheeks and hands, heating up her face, "it's what i always see them do in movies whenever someone's hurt." lottie pauses, considers, "the romance ones at least. i figured it couldn't hurt."

nat nodded slowly, "mhm." as lottie left with a smile, off to find van. nat slowly stood up and glances at her reflection in the mirror, her entire face was pink, "what the fuck?"

the door opens again, and van trips in backward, "lottie what the actual fu-nat?"

the door clicks shut, and the mask that nat's had up for months gets torn down in a second.

"i'm so sorry-i shouldn't have shoved you or sworn at you or-"

it all comes flooding out, and in the middle of it, natalie's hit with the realization; the only person she's ever apologized to, genuinely at least-screaming cries of 'i'm sorry' don't really count when it's aimed at natalie's parents-is van.

"nat!" she stops, as van's all too familiar smile swims back into place, "you're still going through a lot of shit. i know you don't want to admit it, or anything really, but you're a kid." natalie scoffs, and van gives her a look, "and i keep thinking you're changing and of course you are. i'm not mad at you, yeah i kinda wanted to slap you but i'm not mad. ok i'm not that mad. i'm definitely pissed, but we're cool."

natalie hesitates for a second, then smiles, "when the hell did you get so smart?"

van blushes, "hanging out with taissa is doing something fucked to my brain-she actually likes studying."

"just studying, hm?" nat's smirk is back in it's normal place, and van knocks into their shoulder, "says the flamingo after lottie was in here."

"dude. that...i think she broke me."

"really? how the every loving fuck did charlotte matthews break you?

"she's like....magic?"

"how high are you right now?

"no i'm serious it's so weird. she kissed my knuckles after bandaging them."

"nat you are a giant fucking dyke."

"says you."

[snowblossomreads]

Slips down the stairs and gets a concussion from the way you threw this fic at my face. But you know what I won't sue because this was all the repayment because here you come again for my emotions twice in one day.

Here is a montage of my face as I read this : 😡😡🥺🥺🤣🥺🥺🥺😭😭😭😭😭🥰🥰🥰🥰

The way I slumped back in my chair when I read the first line because you gave me war flashbacks to real life (distressed laugh) and then the fucking cat im telling you would have straight up had a break down and been like Ferdinand why are you like this???? ASDSAFH anyways.

BUT MARTHA HAHAH SHE WAS LIKE I GOT EYES ANNA LOUISE AND THIS MAN IS 5 TYPES OF FINE IF YOU DONT GET HIM AND LEAVE THIS HELLSCAPE I WILL. 🤣🥺I respect the game granny hahah.

And now to cry because everything else afterwards had me 🥺🥺😭 the way he got so mad when he thought someone hurt her like he was ready to commit a murder??? the instant adoration he had for her even though she was like :D? why do you believe in me so much we just met bc my dad doesnt my sis doesn't and mom peaced out so she probably didnt?? And him just like I'll wait for you if you want to see the world bc u deserve it and I really hope to see you sweetie🥺🥺😭😭

In that moment she became a track star because those thoughts will really get you running and examing life.

Maam I'm weeping and sobbing while im in on a whole meeting right now (gets fired) as they run off (get onto a train together) into the sunset with each other!!!! Is sure Hans will do everything to keep her safe once she finds out who he is and I feel like she would come around because he's too suave and I'm sure she may kinda be interested because of how little her world has been so far . Would she join him in these things he probably wouldn't let her but I'm sure she wait for him to come back 🥰💖💖💖

THIS GOT OUT OF HAND IM SORRY but this was to darn cute and these happy endings make me so happy and squee squee SQUEE. (why do i feel like ur about to hurt me tho 😬😬)

Prompt: 15. Frosty Glass

Pairing: Gruber x Fem!OC

POV: First, OC

Setting: Small village in the English countryside

Continuation of: 14. Icy Roads

A/N: So yesterday Anna-Louise and Hans met for the first time, both seemingly instantly connecting on some other level. So, let’s see what happens today between plastic santas and a sassy old lady, shall we? 🥰💚

+A/N: AND IT'S ANOTHER BLOODY LONG ONE - WHY DO I DO THIS TO MYSELF?! 😭👍 I was hoping to have everything written for the prompts up until nr.19 today since my dad is coming over to celebrate Christmas this weekend but here I am, just having finished this one... I am terrible at containing myself and it's biting me in the ass right now 😂

Tags/TW’s: Dysfunctional Family, Self-worth Struggle, Repressed Emotions, Abandonment Issues, Hand Holding, Forehead Kisses, Fluffy Feels, Finding One’s Courage

Word Count: 4.7k+

Masterlist page // Masterlist post // AO3 // LINK TREE

“Lulu! There’s no cookies!” dad shouted from the kitchen while I tried to dress the tree and keep sis’s blasted cat out of it simultaneously. Ferdinand was a menace on his best days, Christmas always turned into a blood bath, my hands and arms scratched up from chasing him out of the tree, out of the curtains, away from the presents — it was never-ending.

“Coming!” “Get the minty ones!” he shouted while I tried to hang the tinsel without Ferdinand getting the other end of it. “Sure thing, dad!” “Not those peppermint ones! The minty ones! The green ones!” “Oh my god,” I sighed under my breath. “Yes, dad! I KNOW!” “Oy! Don’t you take that tone with me, lassie!” “Why can’t you go your bloody self for once?” I muttered under my breath while stepping down from the stool.

Mum would have liked this tree, I thought with a smile of relief and pride. “Quite gorgeous if I do say so-, FERDINAND! NO!” The cat was already halfway up the tree, swatting at the tinsel before I could grab him. The cat shrieked and hissed, sinking their claws into my hands repeatedly. “Bloody hell, stupid cat!” Ugh, it’s not your fault but sod off, kitty!

I sat him down on the couch, knowing full well the second I’d leave the room he would be right back up in the tree. “Feral thing,” I hissed and he looked at me with those big eyes that I just couldn’t stay mad at even if my hands stung and were spotted with tiny droplets of blood from his sharp claws.

I washed my hands and grabbed my coat, hearing Ferdinand in the tree before I went out the door just as sis called my name in that tone that could only ever mean she wanted something from me. I didn’t stick around to find out what.

The afternoon was clear and bright despite the clouds hanging low in the sky. The wind had died down at lunch and it hadn’t snowed since last night. So, truthfully, it wasn’t so bad to be out of the house — even if it were on yet another errand for someone else who was too lazy to go themselves. Doesn’t matter, the weather is good, there’s not much people and there’s salt and gravel on the sidewalk so no slipping about today.

I didn’t dare think more of it as Hans had been on my mind nearly constantly since I had basically bolted away from him. Not even affording the man a chance to say goodbye as the conversation had hit too close to home when he asked such a direct question about my own perception of myself, my value. Are all Germans so direct and blunt?

I opened the door to the little café on the main street of the little village I was forced to call home and stomped off the snow from my boots. The space was decorated to the nines with all things tasteless. From the askew garlands to the tacky plastic Santas and elves dotting the surfaces of the room. Just like every year, it gets progressively worse.

“Oh, Anna-Louise!” I turned only to smile kindly at the little lady with a hunched back and a fat little dog by her feet. She was a sweet thing, hard of hearing and brutally honest but kind, to me at least. “Martha, how lovely to see you,” I said while she stepped up with short, slow steps to me. “Oh, don’t be daft, nobody likes me,” she said but I laughed for I actually did — even if she scared the children and swatted at peoples’ legs with her cane when they were in her way. She had taken care of me when nobody else did. When the house was empty and I was all alone at too young of an age she’d dragged me to her house and stuffed me with the saltiest treats and teeth-breaking cookies burned to a crisp.

“Now, when are you leaving?” she asked, peering up at me without being able to straighten her back, her hat askew and her teeth anywhere but in her mouth, as usual. Nothing changes here. “Martha, please,” I said with a smile as I bent down to scratch the fat dog under its chin — mostly to alleviate the strain on Martha’s neck from having to look up at me though. “You know I’m not leaving, I have nowhere to go, and nobody who cares.” “Humph, that’s hogwash and you know it, lassie! Your mum would have been pissed like a babe eating a sour lemon to see you stay around here with that brain of yours. You should be out there, exploring the world,” Martha said and began to throw around her cane to indicate the great big world.

“You know I can’t—” “That cane will cause harm eventually, waving it about in such a way, lady.” My body stiffened, my hand stopped scratching the dog as the dark German accent interrupted my sentence and Martha slammed down her cane by my foot with a loud thud. Hans…

I rose as quickly as I could. “Hans?” I asked while turning around and there he stood, all well-dressed and straight-backed. “Anna-Louise,” he said with a short nod and a warm smile. “Now here we have a fine man!” Martha exclaimed and I blanched for a second before whipping my head around. “Martha, you can’t say things like that!” I hissed, feeling my entire face burn. “What? Nobody ever uses that pretty name of yours anymore, always saying Lulu this and Lulu that. And look at him,” she kept going while pointing with her crocked finger blemished from old age, “he’s right off handsome, dressing as the men used to when I was a lassie.” “Martha, shush,” I tried with to silence her but Hans merely chuckled behind me. “Why, thank you, most kind of you, my lady,” he said in a charming manner that somehow felt quite false to me. He didn’t sound like that yesterday.

But Martha gobbled up the words with a chuckle before moving closer to the German man who'd saved my life yesterday while I was at a loss for what to do with the old lady and her daft behaviour. “You know my Anna-Louise?” she asked. “She’s yours?” he asked in return. “Well, her sleaze of a father ain’t much to hang in the tree, her good-for-nothing sister nothing but trouble and her mother—” “MARTHA. That’s enough,” I interrupted and the old lady tutted at me.

“Anywho, she’s my responsibility, so who are you?” “Hans Gruber, at your service, my lady.” He clicked his heels and bowed ever so slightly and still I felt as if it wasn’t quite him, yet he was bloody charming with his wide smile and friendly manner. There was just something wrong with it.

“German, eh? Love Germany, went with my husband back in the day, before the whole war thing, of course. Bloody waste of—” “Martha, for god’s sake, stop,” I sighed as the lady was about to set off on her usual campaign about how war was worthless, how her family raised bunnies to eat, how her husband was taken by it and all that stuff — stuff everyone already knew, agreed about or felt the same way about. There was absolutely no bloody reason to bring up world war two in the little café with its twinkling lights and the delicious smell of freshly baked treats.

Hans seemed unaffected though. “Shall I hold the door for you, my lady?” he asked with a wink in my direction and my shoulders slumped. Martha seemed delighted at the chivalry so uncommon in the poor village with too many dodgy people loitering about. “A gentleman, that’s proper behaviour!” Martha said and smiled her toothless grin up at him before moving towards the door that Hans opened for her. “Bye Martha! Remember to put your teeth in before you eat!” I called, a bit too loud perhaps, but the old lady really had bad hearing. She just waved me off though, too busy getting her wobbling dog out the door while looking at Hans.

I took the chance to get to the counter. But I had barely found the right minty cookies before Hans appeared next to me. “Lively lady,” he said with a chuckle and I smiled up at him in apology. “She’s quite the rascal, really, but she’s sweet. Just need to watch out for the cane, and have lots of patience, but she’s not bad,” I said before clamping my mouth shut. “I can imagine,” Hans simply said with a much warmer smile, a genuine feel to him now.

“Here for the treats?” I asked while turning back to see if there were any blueberry muffins left even if I couldn’t afford them. “Ah, no, actually,” he said and I glanced up at him. “You do know this is a café, right? Treats are kinda what they do here.” “Well, yes,” he chuckled, “but I saw you through the window, schnuki.” “Oh,” I said, not knowing what to make of it but feeling the strangest of giddy feelings at the way he looked a bit nervous.

“But, now that I am here, what do you recommend?” “Hmm, well, that depends on what you like. They have a lot of good stuff and the owner is really nice too, he bakes amazing bread too. The coffee is fresh as well, if you like coffee. I’m quite dependent on it,” I smiled while blabbering on. Unable to stop. Feeling as if there were butterflies in my stomach when he stood so close and offered me his full attention. “What are you having?” “Oh, nothing, I’m just getting some cookies for my dad, he ran out.” “So, out on another errand for someone else again?” I laughed nervously at that before biting my lip and turning away, not wanting to show that he’d hit the nail on the head once more.

“Why not get something while you are here? Tell me what you want the most?” “We aren’t all Oxford owners, you know.” “Oxford owners?” he asked, and my shoulders crept towards my ears — embarrassed about the muttering tone of my voice. “We can’t all afford treats,” I clarified in a low voice. “Schnuki,” he said and stepped a little closer, “I can afford to treat you. So, what do you want to have?”

I looked up at him, seeing him so close had my heart in a revolt of the warmest kind. “You really don’t—” “I can afford Oxfords,” he said matter-of-factly, putting an end to the debate. “Blueberry muffin,” I said, almost stunned at my own words -- short and to the point for once. There was no need to blabber much more as Hans actually listened to me, it felt a bit strange, honestly. “That’s your preference?” “My favourite.” “Well then, let’s get one each and some coffee.” I nodded at him, not knowing what to do when he was so kind, and giving. I wasn’t used to it. Everyone in the village had to hold on tight to their money, some more than others and my family was definitely part of that group. Or, I was at least, dad doing whatever he wished and my sis getting her way most of the time — with him or boys in general.

≪⁕≫

Hans hummed as he took the first bite of his muffin. “It’s good, right?” I asked with a small smile while tugging off my gloves to take my own muffin. “Really deli—” His eyes widened as I reached for my muffin and before I knew it my hands were in his. “What happened to your hands?” he asked while the warmth of his skin spread across my chilly hands with a wave of warmth rising within me. I couldn’t get my brain to even think a thought when he touched me, skin on skin.

“Schnuki? What happened? Why are you harmed?” I shook my head, blinking away the daze. “Oh, Ferdinand swatted at me, I’m fine though. He’s just—” “He? Who? Who is Ferdinand?” he gritted out, his blue eyes harsh. “Oh, my sis’s cat, he’s such a rascal because she never tamed him properly and I was doing the tree and he was trying to get the tinsel and climb it so I had to grab him and-, sorry, I’m blabbering… But I’m fine,” I said with a nervous smile as my hands kept tingling while he held them.

“Your hands should never look like this. Why did your sister not deal with her beast?” “Hans,” I laughed while he inspected my hands anew, “he’s no beast, he’s just a bit of a feral kitty.” “Still, this looks painful.” “I’m used to—” “This happens often?” “Well, yeah, I have to deal with him since sis doesn’t. She just thought he looked cute as a baby kitten, and dad hates Ferdinand, but he’s obsessed with making my sis happy so the cat would die if I didn’t care for it as much as possible. He doesn’t like me very much though, he’s a cat so he doesn’t understand who cleans his litterbox and makes sure there’s cat food and treats and clean water every day and all that. And he hates it when I bathe him, that’s a bloody war each time but he has sensitive skin so he needs baths with a special shampoo and-, oh, I’m blabbering again, I’m so sorry, I talk too much, all the time,” I said and finally managed to shut my mouth while my nerves were tied up in knots.

Through it all Hans still held my hands, his eyes apparently never leaving my face while my eyes bounced all over. He was too handsome and when he gave me his undivided attention I could barely hold myself together. So much in me was ready to burst out but he was a stranger I’d only met twice.

“Your family sounds quite terrible, quite selfish,” he said quietly and I laughed nervously, his words being too accurate. Again. “It’s not a laughing matter, why do you let them treat you this way?” “What else am I supposed to do? They’re my family,” I said and he finally (regrettably) released my hands while leaning back, looking at me intently. “Leave? You’re an adult.” “Yeah but I don’t have anyone and I can’t just leave, where am I supposed to go? I’ve never been further than London.” “You don’t need anyone, schnuki. You’re capable and more than able to stand on your own two feet.”

I glanced at him while wrapping my hands around the coffee cup, seeping up the warmth it offered my cold palms. “You don’t know me, Hans,” I whispered, feeling defeated when he had such faith in me. The last person who ever had faith in me was my mother and there was no faith to be had there anymore. “I don’t need to know you, it’s enough to look at you and talk with you a bit.” “Fine, be that as it may, I don’t want to be alone out there. The world is too big, too cruel and harsh. I’d break down in a puddle of anxiety. No, I’m better off here.” “Yet you’re not.” “I didn’t realise the muffin came with a therapy session,” I chuckled while I did my damnedest to restrain the tears wanting to well up. He was so genuine in his words, it just touched something within me — not to mention how he watched me, what it felt like to be near him and the strong sensation of care he radiated.

“I’ve offended you,” he said. “I’m sorry, schnuki.” “No, no you haven’t, I just-, it’s not so simple.” “What if I make it simple?”

I looked up at him, my muffin still untouched on the table and he had gotten comfortable in the booth. Something about the way he spoke those last words had my full attention. Something lingered in the air around him and it felt… honest.

“How would you do that?” I asked, leaning my elbows on the table to not crumble under his heavy gaze. He smiled slyly yet it was done in a comforting, alluring manner. The man had some unexplainable charm, not to mention he was easily the hottest man I had ever seen — not that I had ever been very attracted to anyone I’d ever met before. But his looks were so singular and it felt as if he held himself with a certain pride that had nothing to do with vanity. “Come with me,” he said, no faltering or humour in his voice while I blinked rapidly at him.

I burst out laughing, turning a few heads at the loud noise. “Oh yeah, let me just go with the stranger I met only yesterday, that’s a brilliant idea,” I laughed but he didn’t join in. He remained quiet, serious. “You’re joking, right?” “No.” “You’re being serious?” “Yes,” he nodded while his smile crept back for a second.

I leaned back, my mouth agape and my brain stunned. “You do know that’s like how to not get kidnapped one-o-one, do not go anywhere with strangers. Especially as a woman, and even more so when the stranger is a man.” “So that’s what we are, schnuki? Strangers? Just a man and a woman?” “Well, yes! We just met yesterday!” “Yet I’ve been unable to stop thinking about you.” And I you… This is madness!

My heart was running amok, my brain malfunctioning, and there was some idiotic part of me that simply wanted to say yes. Say ‘take me away from here and never stop looking at me like you are doing right now’ kind of thing that was wholly foolish and a thousand times idiotic.

“I don’t know you, Hans,” I said, even if there was some part of me that for whatever reason had faith in the man. That I wouldn’t come to harm, that I wouldn’t be abandoned again, or treated like some slave in my own home. Hans was… different. “And I don’t know you, Anna-Louise. Yet still, I feel as if I know who you are, what you are supposed to be.” “Nobody knows that,” I sighed, grabbing my coffee anew and drinking a large gulp despite the hot liquid burning my tongue.

“If nobody knows, then that includes you, no?” he asked while I sat the cup down. My eyes lingered on the blueberry muffin. “I guess, that’s almost fair to say. I don’t think anybody really knows who they are or what they are supposed to be.” “Then why not trust in someone else to see something more in oneself?”

I had no answer to that.

“Schnuki,” he said while his hand reached out and took mine gently, his thumb stroking over my knuckles softly. “Why do you call me that? What does it even mean?” I asked and looked up at him, his face soft while his eyes hooked mine. “I’m leaving at nine, taking the train north,” he said and avoided my questions entirely. “If you change your mind and decide you’d like to see the world with me, I’ll be waiting until the very last second, schnuki…”

He release my hand, stroked my jawline gently, and stood. My eyes followed his face all the way up while everything in my body screamed for me to take his hand and walk right out of the café by his side. That my life was going to walk right out with him and I’d never live another day as anything more than Lulu when I could be schnuki, whatever the hell that means. It can’t be worse than losing my name because it takes too much energy to say it, to be of so little value not even my name worth saying in its entirety… But he says it.

Hans walked around the edge of the table, pulling on his black gloves and adjusting the scarf around his neck while my body tensed. He was handsome, elegant, different and alluring in a way I’d never experienced before. “Schnuki,” he said and leaned forward, kissing my forehead gently. Yet, there was resolve and some touchable feeling of longing I couldn’t quite place seeping from his lips against my skin. “If we never met again, know that you are worth more than you think,” he said against my forehead and straightened to his full height.

The sound of the door closing jolted me. I turned to look out through the window, wanting to see him one last time only to find him standing there on the other side with a warm smile that was slightly blurry through the glass covered in frost. He just stood there, watching me for a long moment while my body appeared frozen in place, unable to run after him because of the fear yet unable to get my heart to understand that he wasn’t going to stay.

He took off his glove and drew the tip of his finger against the glass, melting the frost with his body heat while writing something. My eyes were too occupied with the view of his handsome face to fully register what he was doing though. And then he looked at me again, smiling softly with sincerity in those clear eyes. My heart pounded, my ribs hurt from the beating — or perhaps from the knowledge it held that my brain couldn’t comprehend.

One second he was there, and then he was gone. It took me a moment to realise I was staring out the window at absolutely nothing, then I bolted outside. “HANS!” I called over the sound of passing cars and laughing pedestrians. But he wasn’t there. My entire body slumped and a cold sense of dread crept in as I looked around the main street — all the shops and buildings engraved in my mind, every stone housing a memory I wished to forget or a feeling I never wished to experience again. All around me lay everything I had always wanted to escape from, yet had been tied to so fiercely I failed when the opportunity was given. Because I was afraid, taught to think of myself as something small and worthless to the world.

I hugged myself and turned only to catch my reflection in the frosty glass. My eyes had smiled yesterday when I looked in the mirror while brushing my teeth, because he had been on my mind. Now, they were back to their normal state, closed off and vacant. I drew a deep breath and tried to find it in me to turn around and go home.

‘Sweetie’ it said on the window. Where Hans had been writing with his finger, the word sweetie was left behind and I couldn’t understand why such a childishly cute nickname damn near hurt every fibre of my body. Yes, you do, you know, Anna-Louise. You know why it hurt. You bloody well know! I screamed at myself in my head while I grabbed at the fabric covering my chest.

I had been nothing but unwanted, found to be a blabbering nuisance that could never do enough or be enough. The only thing I ever did enough of was talking, but what point is there to talking when nobody ever listens? I talk all the time because-, because no matter what I say or how many times I say it nobody hears me anyway… Nobody listens. I could say I’d off myself and nobody would bat an eye, they wouldn’t have heard me…

I wiped at my cheeks, the tears coming even if I didn’t want them to. My throat closed up as my fingers touched the glass where his finger had been, my other hand covering my mouth to silence the crying I didn’t want to let out. It felt as if years upon years of suppressed hurt, caged anger and hidden fear were trying to crawl their way into the light. It was so easy to hide it away, pretend it wasn’t there when nobody ever cared to see, to listen, to remind me of the fact that I deserved more. That I didn’t deserve to feel like I always did, to hide away and blabber myself into oblivion in the hope that maybe someone would see me, hear me…

I withdrew my hand, wrapping it around my aching stomach while clamping down my hand even harder on my mouth as my tears rolled despite my wish for them to stay hidden while my legs began to tremble beneath me. Did mum feel like this when she left? Was I not enough even for her to-, to bring me with her… It was the thought I never allowed myself to think.

“It can’t end like this. I can’t end up like this. There-, there has to be more to life than-, than-, than this,” I whispered against my palm while the tears chilled my face in the icy English winter. I’ll go. I’ll go and I won’t look back no matter what happens. I can’t-, I can’t live like this. And I… A gasp escaped me as my eyes lingered on the word ‘sweetie’, I feel something significant for him. There’s more to him, us, than just… strangers. There’s more.

≪⁕≫

I ran. My bag thudded against my thigh. They didn’t even notice. They won’t notice until there’s nobody there to do it all. And I won’t! I won’t be there anymore for them!

I panted as the station came into view, the large clock at the entrance standing at 08.56 pm. My heart ached and fluttered, my legs were drained and stiff while the wind clawed at my cheeks. He’ll be there, he has to be there, I chanted over and over in my head to keep the tears at bay.

I was leaving. I wasn’t coming back. I was running away. Running towards something. Someone.

“Please, be, there,” I panted. My breath turned to fog and I slowed down, unable to breathe without a burning sensation erupting in my throat from the cold air being inhaled too swiftly. I slowed down, feeling the nerves erupt and the fear of the unknown tried to make me turn around. But I couldn’t. The thought of him, of Hans, waiting for me with that longing in his eyes that saw me. The man who was happy when I blabbered after having been so quiet at the beginning. ‘She speaks’ he had said with warmth and I could not imagine ever forgetting those words.

I walked through the station house, my naked hands red and raw from the cold while I grasped at the strap of the duffel bag. He’ll be there. He’ll be waiting. He’ll absolutely be there. Right..? “I’ve lost my mind. I’m leaving with a stranger who calls me sch-nuky,” and I can’t even say it right… What am I—

There he was. Waiting on the platform. His entire body tense and stiff. But he was waiting. He was there.

It felt as if I could breathe again. My shoulders sank and an involuntary smile stretched my lips wide at the sight of him. I remained utterly still for a moment as I took him in, took in the fact that he was waiting for me while the train lay idle in wait for its departure time.

“H-Hans,” I whispered, my voice shaking. There was no chance he could have heard me from so far away, yet he straightened and looked around. His eyes found me nearly instantly and his entire body softened. A smile of his own spread across those thin lips framed by his perfectly groomed beard.

I couldn’t move, couldn’t get my legs to take me to him. Stunned that it was all happening. Surprised at the absolute joy in my heart at seeing him again. Transfixed by the shift in his eyes as he looked me over, his gaze snagging on my bag for a second before he began walking towards me. My fingers squeezed the strap harder as he drew closer, my throat closing up.

“Schnuki,” he exhaled a step away from me and then I was in his arms. “You came,” he murmured, as if he struggled for words as well. My arms came around him and I buried my cold face in his chest and shoulder. “I did.” “Anna-Louise…” he exhaled and kissed the side of my head. “We’ll see the world together, my sweet treat,” he continued after that and I couldn’t imagine I would ever have found the courage to leave the misery behind if it weren’t for the stranger who I’d so foolishly swiftly fallen head over heels for.

Masterlist page // Masterlist post // AO3 // LINK TREE

A/N: I love these two… Like, I love the way this is so held back yet obvious at the same time. They are so darn cute together and I can’t help but wonder how Anna-Louise would react to finding out who she’s actually left everything for… 😬 What do you think? Would they be able to get through that when they are so new to each other 🤔 I have no idea, maybe?

Either way, I hope you enjoyed this and that you found some delight in the cuteness 🙈🥰💚

Taglist: @lizlil @snapefiction @darkthought15 @monstreviolet @flowerdementia @marvelschriss @once-upon-an-imagine @ravennight41 @caseydoodles98 @slytherinprincess03 @theconsultingdetectiveswife @grimmyhild @monster-energies @myobscureimaginarium @snowblossomreads @eternal-silvertongued-prince @cherryglossie@setsuna-meiou31 @helena211 @a-queen-and-her-throne @justsaturn0 @turvi @imwithyoutiltheendofthelinebucky @sunnylikesfrogs @mamawolfsmith16 @dianilaws @snowblossomreads @leah1243 @reinekefoxart @reiketsunomizunomegami @lokisbjchn

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[Dec:2022]

[mercy-burning]

Your Favorite — Part 2

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!Reader Summary: Y/N and Spencer decide to keep seeing each other in secret. Category: SMUT (18+) Content: Adults w/ age gap, cockwarming, heavy petting, penetrative/unprotected sex, breeding kink, oral sex (both receiving), degradation, exhibitionism, fingering, cum play maybe? Word Count: 7.5k

PART 1 | PART 2 | PART 3 | MASTERLIST

NOTE: This is... *nervous laugh* this is pure filth. Like... It’s nothing but sex scenes, y’all. Buckle in. (Also the end is a lil angsty so watch out hehehe)

———

JULY 8th

"You're sure you guys are okay without me for a little while?"

I love my mom. Really, I do.

But if she delays her bath for any longer than one more second, I'm going to burst into flames.

Thankfully it seems that Spencer is patient enough for the both of us. "Positive. You deserve to relax a little. Go. Take your bath, we'll be fine."

Mom looks to me for extra reassurance, and I give it to her with a nod.

"Okay. I'll try not to be too long."

She turns and kisses Spencer, long and lovesick, and I want to barf. What's even worse is that when she pulls away and pats my head before retreating up the stairs, he's smiling. And he's supposed to, I know that. Part of him obviously cares about my mom, and even if he's only fucking me on the side, the fact remains that he goes to sleep next to her. That's the way it has to be.

But it still makes me incredibly envious.

It's a problem.

Mom is upstairs now, but our rule is that unless we know for certain that she's not coming into sight or earshot anytime soon, we remain distant.

Still, I make my distaste for their affections known. "You guys are gross..."

Spencer laughs, his hand sneaking over the couch cushion and grazing the end of my skirt. "Jealous, are we?"

Of course, I have to make it difficult for him. "You're a genius, you tell me..."

"Hey now... You're lucky I'm giving you any attention at all... Besides, you know the rules."

I glance over at him, practically crumbling apart at the seams under his intense gaze. It's one I've gotten used to as of late, one that rivals every smile I've ever seen him give my mother.

"Doesn't make it any easier," I mumble, glancing down at where his fingers are still toying with my skirt.

"I know..." He reaches out and touches my hand, and my skin tingles. "Come here."

Even though I can hear that the bath water has only just started running from below, I comply all the same. I scramble off the couch and return on his lap, straddling him and nesting my fingers through his hair while I lean in to kiss him.

He welcomes me with open arms and an open mouth. The moment our tongues brush, I sigh and melt into him, needing desperately to be as close as possible. Our kisses then are languid and wet, and soft. We don't want to get carried away in case we need to be alert and jump apart, so it's best to keep our bodies controlled.

But as I'm learning, around Spencer, controlling myself is painstakingly difficult.

A whine escapes me when his right hand slips under my skirt and rests along the inside of my thigh, and I shift, silently begging him to give me more.

"So impatient..." he mumbles over my mouth.

I pull away and slide my hands down over his neck and shoulders, my hips rolling forward as I pout. "I haven't had you all week. I'm lonely..."

It's true.

Once all my STD tests came back clean and I got my birth control figured out and solid, the first thing he did was tell my mom he wasn't feeling well and texted me the address to his apartment. And after I told her I was meeting up with a friend, I drove over there and got my brains completely fucked out. We spent all day under the sheets, on the couch, over the kitchen counter, and then on the floor, until I had to go home and pretend like it never happened.

Since then we'd only slept together once, and that was just over a week ago, quickly while Mom ran to the store for an onion of all things. And then Spencer had been busy with consulting on new cases that his old job wanted a little help with, and once he had free time, Mom insisted they go on a date weekend.

I pout harder, stomach churning at the memory of the look he gave me before they left—a silent, sweet goodbye that had left me empty and wanting.

But he's just amused.

A smirk ghosts over his lips, red and a little puffy from the pressure of my own against them. "So I definitely can't trust you to be quiet enough to fuck you properly..."

That warrants another whine and another roll of my hips, and I can feel his hand gripping my thigh a little tighter.

"Please... Spencer, I need you..."

His name rolling off my tongue must be what makes him give into me, because I barely have time to react before he's kissing me again, using both of his hands to lift the back of my skirt up and knead my ass.

"Wait... Are you wearing..."

I grin over his lips, wiggling my ass into his touch and utterly turned on by the fact that he knows what underwear I'm wearing just by touch.

"Mhmm," I answer, nipping his bottom lip. "Your favorite..."

The sound that rumbles in his chest as he crashes his body against mine has to be the sexiest thing I've ever heard. He's obviously trying not to be loud, but it's hard, and that makes the sound strained. He really wants this, wants to keep me, and to do that he has to refrain from going absolutely primal right now. He has to do anything to keep this quiet.

So he pushes me off of him, and I pout, thinking he's given up until we can get a true moment alone.

But I know that isn't the case when he spins his finger and then starts undoing his pants.

"Turn around, sweetheart," he huffs, slipping his pants and underwear down just enough that his erection emerges free. "You're gonna sit here, keep quiet, and keep my cock nice and warm, understood?"

Don't have to tell me twice... I'll fucking take what I can get.

So I spin, back up, and move all my clothing to the side, my skirt lifting as I nestle into Spencer's lap and hold my panties to the side. He laughs at my eagerness, though he isn't laughing much longer once I sink down onto him and get in real close. His hands come out to grab my chest and pull me flush against his own.

The way he stretches and fills me has my eyes rolling back, a long, happy sigh falling from my lips. I wish I could say I'm being dramatic about it, but I'm really not.

I'm genuinely relieved and satisfied with the burn.

"There's my girl," Spencer muses through a sigh of his own, his breath fanning gently over my neck right before he gives it an open-mouthed kiss.

His hands slip under the baggy sweater I'm wearing and run along the planes of my stomach, then up and up, taking the fabric with him until it rests above my bare chest. Being exposed like this, right in the middle of the living room while my mom is just upstairs, excites me more than I think it should.

While Spencer kisses and licks at my neck, his hands now gently kneading my breasts, I squirm.

He doesn't like that very much.

"Ah-ah," he warns, squeezing me tight and pulling me into him more. "Relax..."

He hooks his legs around mine then, spreading them apart and somehow filling me deeper. I whine, leaning my head back onto his shoulder and trying not to roll my hips.

Instead, I settle for clenching myself around him, and that seems to be the right move.

"Atta girl... Lay back and relax... Just feel me filling you up nice and slow..."

"Mmmm," I respond in kind as his hands loosen and glide down my body.

He's light with his touch, though the kisses on my neck feel hungry, and his cock feels heavy and thick inside me. It's a beautiful contrast, really, making me feel so full and yet so light, like I'm a raincloud.

Soon his fingers dip under my skirt and cover my hand, which is working at keeping my panties off to the side. He traces the curves of my fingers with his own, mumbling praises and scattering kisses along the side of my neck. And I'm distracted enough that I almost don't feel his other hand make gentle contact with my clit until I gasp from the sharp sensation.

I can feel his smile against my skin as he starts rubbing in slow, precise circles.

"That feel good, princess?"

"Uh huh," I breathe out, trying to keep still. My other hand digs into my knee in hopes that I can stay grounded and focused on keeping still. But despite that, I'm feeling rather calm. Satisfied...

Right where he wants me.

"Mmm..." He hums happily into my skin, continuing to kiss my neck while working my clit.

And I have no idea how long we lay there. It feels like it could be hours.

The TV is on, but we're not paying any attention to it. In the back of my mind I know that Mom could be done with her bath at any minute, but it's been too long without Spencer inside me... And even though he's not actually fucking me, just having him this close and feeling him touch me, fill me, breathe me in...

God, I never want it to stop.

I'm almost on the verge of coming, but he removes his hand from me and slides them up my stomach again.

I whine at the loss of orgasm, but he pays it no mind. "Here's what you're gonna do. You're gonna start moving..."

I start to get excited, wiggling in his lap a little.

With a dark laugh, he brings his hands to my breasts, kneading them gently and nipping my earlobe. Getting my attention...

"But you're not gonna stop until I fill that slutty little cunt with my cum, got it? I don't care if you come more than once. I don't care if you come at all... I don't care if your mom comes down here and sees..."

I swear I almost come on the spot from his words alone.

And then his voice is somehow even darker, seeping through my skin and settling into the very deepest parts of me.

"You will not stop until you make me come, am I clear?"

I wouldn't deny him if I could. I'm so damn whipped by this man, so eager to please and be near him that he could ask me to do any fucking thing on the planet and I would.

My rational brain might have second-guessed that feeling if it hadn't been horny as fuck...

And so I get to it, maneuvering my hips and working Spencer's cock like my life depends on it. And honestly, it kind of does, because if my mother comes down and catches us I'm dead.

Despite the urgency, though, I relish every second of it. I try to remember every sensation vividly because I don't know when I'll get to feel it again. So every time I sit back down on his dick, I clench it on the way up, because I know that drives him wild and it also means I get to feel him grab me tighter.

I can't see him, not even really when I turn my head, but I can picture how he's probably biting his lip, trying not to be loud. His eyes are probably shooting daggers at the ceiling, praying to the heavens above that my mom won't come down.

But it looks like the heavens above have decided to damn us to hell.

That unmistakable sound of the drain in the tub rumbles through the ceiling and down the inside of the walls as the water travels through the pipes, and my heartbeat races faster than it ever has.

Spencer tugs my hair then, pulling my head to meet his shoulder once more. "You better hurry, little girl..."

That's when I finally come. My cunt throbs and shakes around him as I bounce as quietly as I can. His grip in my hair is tighter, urging me to keep going, and the sharp sensation seems to extend my orgasm a little.

I whimper and whine as I feel it, and that seems to be what does him in.

"Fuck, Y/N, that's it... That's my girl..."

Four more bounces from me is all it takes, and then he's holding my hips in place. He grunts as quietly as possible into my shoulder and fucks into me slowly, filling me to the brim with his cum and breathing harshly into my skin.

I can hear Mom walking around upstairs, most likely getting dressed, which means she'll be down any minute...

"Time to get up, princess," Spencer whispers a moment later, letting go of my hips.

I turn my head into his neck, whining. "I don'wanna..."

"I know, I know... But you have to."

I know he's right. But I can't just get up and lose him so quickly. I want to hold on for as long as possible.

So I tilt my head up and bring his lips to mine. Thankfully he doesn't reject me, instead returning my affections and sighing into my mouth. He's still sheathed inside me, and I can feel his cum very slowly starting to drip down.

I have to get up now...

My mouth reluctantly parts from his and pouts. I expect him to return it with a sad smile, but his lips are rather mischievous.

He smirks, lifting me off of him and quickly pulling my panties back in place. His cum instantly soaks into the thin, lavender fabric, and it only reminds me of his absence.

But then Spencer spins me around on the heels of my feet and presses his hand firmly to my clothed, sopping wet cunt under my skirt, rubbing it in and making me whimper out at the overstimulation.

"I missed you," he whispers sincerely. Sweetly...

I can't help but smile as I lean down to kiss him one more time.

"I missed you, too."

JULY 23rd

I've been looking forward to this weekend since Mom brought it up after her bath—A call from work. A weekend business trip across the country.

She would be gone for almost a whole week.

Spencer's already started on his coursework for the next school year so he'll be busy most days, but at night? That's when he's all mine.

The only hard part about this, really, is containing my excitement. Just yesterday Spencer got me alone and warned me that I better keep my cool and be patient. Though, the way he said it was hardly a bad thing considering it gave me an excuse to feel his hands on me, even in the laundry room where, more or less, this had all started.

Even now I can still feel their warmth and their heft as they grope and paw at my breasts while he attacks my neck with sloppy kisses.

But right now he's not here, and as much as I can't wait to spend the week with him, my mom is also going to be gone for that long.

Just because I'm fucking her boyfriend on a regular basis doesn't mean I don't still love her.

Though, the thought of it all makes me a little uneasy—I don't know what the future holds. I know Spencer obviously cares about my mom, but if it really gets to a point where they've been together long enough, would he ever marry her?

And then what?

It's one thing for him to be my mom's boyfriend, who doesn't live here and only stays when he can... But it's a whole other one to be my stepfather. And what if my mom wants to have another kid?

No.

I'm not even going to think about it... If it ever gets to that point, then we'll deal with it, but right now I've only known Spencer for nearly 2 months, and it's way too soon to be thinking about any of that right now.

"You gonna be alright without me for a week?"

I curl into Mom's side, laughing and thankful for her distraction. "I spend almost a whole year away at college without you, I think I can survive five days."

"Ugh, don't remind me. I wish you could just stay here with me forever."

"Ha, no you don't. I'm a menace."

"Only when you eat all my food and then complain that you're starving..."

My eyes roll affectionately. "Mom. That was one time, and I was fifteen and dramatic."

She kisses the top of my head and then rests her chin on it. "Then my point stands... You were only a menace when you were fifteen. Now you're an angel."

I can tell she's sincere, and when I tell her Thank you, it feels incredibly deceitful—Especially when she starts humming my favorite song and brushing through my hair with her fingers, just like she used to do to get me to sleep as a kid. The foggy feeling it sends through my bloodstream reminds me that I'm definitely not the same person I was back then.

Although, it is true that some things never change, and within minutes I'm soundly asleep in my mother's arms.

———

When Spencer and I are sending her off at the airport the next morning, my heart thrums wildly in my chest.

"You have Spencer's number in case of an emergency?" she asks me in a haste.

"Yes, Mom. For the thousandth time, I have his number, and I have Grandma's number, and I have just about every other number you've ever given me for emergency contacts."

She gives me The Look.

"Yes, I have it. And I'll be okay. I love you."

"Oh, I love you, too," she says, pulling me in for one last breath-reducing hug, though, that's not truly what knocks the breath from my lungs.

She goes to Spencer next, reaching up to give him a goodbye kiss. I'm expecting it. I'm okay with it.

But this is unlike any other kiss I've seen them share, and it admittedly makes me jealous.

Spencer almost has her off the ground, pressing her close to him and kissing her deeply. Her hands weave through his hair as he tilts his head, and this time I can see his tongue slip into her mouth.

"O—kaaay, my eyes are burning... Thank you for that..."

I know I can get away with that because it's a completely normal reaction to seeing your mother make out with anyone, so I don't feel bad about it one bit. And I especially don't feel bad about the warning look he gives me over my mom's shoulder when she comes to give me another hug.

But then she's gone, and minutes later we're leaving the airport parking lot, and I can't seem to shake my jealousy. Even when his hand rests politely on my knee.

The whole way home I only barely acknowledge his presence, giving him half-hearted smiles and remaining mostly still when he glides his hand higher up my leg. By the time his fingers slip under the hem of my skirt, I think he knows something is up, because it stops there.

He waits until we get in the house to bring it up.

"Y/N, are you okay?"

I plop myself down on the couch with an overexaggerated sigh. "Kinda..."

I know Spencer used to be a profiler, and really, it's not that hard to figure out what's wrong with me. But it's still a little scary how easily he just knows.

"You know I had to," he says, walking over and standing in front of me. "Keeping up appearances and whatnot."

He's right. And it's a consequence of what we've decided to do, so really I'm in no place to complain.

Still, I reach out and pull him in by the belt loops, leaning my face in rather close to his crotch. "You know... Actually, I think you just like making me jealous..."

The smile that dances over his lips is amused and downright sinful. "Oh?"

"Mhmm," I drawl, sliding my hands to the front of his pants and rubbing him through the fabric.

He laughs. "Yeah, you are pretty cute when you're all huffy."

With big eyes and a fluttering in my stomach at the way he looks down at me, I feel that pressing of jealousy start to lift off my chest. I know that within an hour he'll have me pinned under his body somehow, and the thought allows my response to come out clearly and without question.

"So how are you gonna make it up to me?"

———

We're already out of our clothes by the time we make it upstairs. And when we finally get into my bedroom, I'm about to shut the door and then Spencer stops me.

"No one's home, sweetheart... Leave it open."

He takes two steps and has me in his arms, his hands sliding down my back and resting over my ass. And when he gives it a squeeze, he grins down at me. "You're gonna be loud for me, understand?"

"Hey, that's on you," I tease, wiggling against him. "You want me loud? Make me loud."

His grip on my ass gets tighter as he pulls me closer, and I yelp out. "Don't challenge me, little girl... You'll regret it."

I laugh then, calling back to his earlier statement. "Aw... You're pretty cute when you're all huffy..."

"Alright, fine."

The next thing I know, I'm on my knees, and his hands are rooting in my hair. The rough carpet underneath me already burns, but I know in the end it's gonna be so worth it.

Spencer brings me close to his exposed crotch and tilts my head up to look at him. "I'm gonna fuck that attitude right out of your pretty little mouth, got it? And you're not gonna do a damn thing but take it like a good girl."

I would have asked him if that was a threat or a promise if he hadn't immediately shoved his dick in my mouth. It has me wet in an instant, the way he just pulls me onto him and starts fucking my face with an urgency that seems to contradict all the time we have. He needs me now, with no time for teasing or pleasantries, and I fucking love it.

Which is why I do as I'm told, enjoying every second as he holds my head still and snaps his hips forward, his velvety smooth cock gliding over my tongue and down my throat with ease. It doesn't take long for my eyes to water, my vision going blurry and my body growing hot. My face is angled straight ahead, but I still find a way to look up at him, and from this low angle?

It's the best thing I've ever seen.

No matter how many times I've been on my knees like this, staring up at Spencer as he loses himself at my hands (or rather my mouth, if you want to get technical), I swear I could never tire of it.

His eyes are glaring down at me as he concentrates, his arms are out in front of me as they hold my head in place, and his pubic bone and sculpted hips are right there, moving ferociously in front of my eyes. He's so deep in my throat for a few seconds, holding me down while I gag around him, that my nose is buried in the soft trail of hair that gathers on his skin, and I want to stay there forever.

But my gag reflex isn't much durable for more than fifteen seconds, much less forever, so I have to pull back.

Spencer pulls me off of him completely, a trail of spit following my lips and then detaching until it lands along my chin. I blink away some of the tears that had gathered in my eyes and pout up at him.

"What's the matter, sweetheart?"

"You're supposed to be making it up to me..." My voice is scratchy and a little hoarse now, but I know it'll probably be worse if Spencer really thinks he can make me as loud as he says (which I truly don't doubt for a second).

He tugs me up by the hair, and I whine as I get to my feet, my knees aching already. And then his mouth is on my cheek, gently kissing away a tear. "Aw, I thought you liked having my dick in your mouth..."

"I do..."I giggled a little, nestling into his body and feeling his erection, now slick with my saliva, press up against the inside of my thigh. "But I like it better in other places..."

"Mmm, you're right... I do, too..."

I certainly hadn't been expecting that answer.

But it doesn't surprise me when he walks us over to the foot of my bed and pushes me onto it. "Hands and knees, princess."

My knees still burn from the carpet, and I'm sure this squeaky-ass mattress won't alleviate the pain at all, but if there's one thing I've learned since having sex with Spencer it's that pain is all part of the pleasure.

So I don't question it. My limbs submit to his simple command, and once I turn away from him and perch myself on my hands and knees, I can feel him climbing on the bed and crawling up the backside of my body. His hands roam my ass and my waist, and within seconds he has his cock nestled against me.

He moves nice and slow at first, dragging the length of him through my slick cunt and ghosting the skin of my backside with his hands.

"Remember... Nice and loud, okay? Wanna hear how good I make you feel."

Like I could ever deny him. Even though I like to tease him and push his buttons, I couldn't think of a single thing in the moment that I'd ever deny him.

So he finally pushes into me, stretching me out well and good, and a low groan slowly rolls off my tongue like a waterfall. And I'm not doing it for his sake; It's like he draws it out of me like a syringe, and I'm utterly powerless against it... Against him.

Like I need a metaphor to explain how I'm well and truly his bitch...

"There she is..." Spencer breathes, reaching the very deepest part of me and staying there. "There's my obedient little girl... Tell me what you want."

I turn my head to get as good of a look at him as I can, and give him the pout to end all pouts. "I want you to fuck me, hard... Please?"

His answer is a gentle push forward, his body leaning over mine to take my hands and pin them behind my back, which pulls me up towards him so that my back is nearly flush with his chest. His hands are so big that one of them is able to hold both of my wrists while the other gathers my hair and tugs.

I feel like I'm being held by a bungee cord, especially when Spencer starts snapping his hips and pounding into me roughly. My knees are pushing into the springs of the mattress and lifting again with each thrust, and I can't help the stream of whimpers and shouts that escape me at the whole experience.

He lets go of my hair in favor of reaching around and palming my left tit, his pace never faltering for a second. Everything he's doing is precise and swift and so fucking good that my eyes can hardly stay open.

"I'm hearing you, pretty girl, but I don't think you're quite loud enough..." he grumbles in my ear, letting go of me and gently pushing me back down on the bed. He slips out of me and I whine at the loss, but I don't have to worry about it much longer when I feel him lay down over top of me and slam into me hard.

I yelp out, my hands reaching out and clutching the comforter for dear life. Spencer's hands, meanwhile, push up off the mattress on either side of my hips to lift himself up, and then he's grabbing my waist and pushing me into it while he fucks me.

When I instinctively shove my face down and try to muffle myself, though, one of his hands leaves my waist and comes up to tug my hair, pulling my head up. His hips pause, pressed deep into my backside, and I can feel how he's struggling to keep still.

"Uh-uh... No one's home, princess... Let it all out..."

He pulls back and plows into me again, and this time his pace is frustratingly slow. With each slam forward my voice grows louder, begging him for more with incoherence until I start to feel myself grow tense with pleasure.

"You're almost there, baby, I can feel it," Spencer breathes. His voice is far away, and I wish he was closer, his breath on my neck and his lips not far behind. But for now I gladly settle for his hands, tight and bruising on my hips, and the force of his pelvis as it collides brutally and wonderfully with my ass.

What finally brings me sweet release is the sound of him grunting out one word. A command. And once again it's like I'm powerless under his spell.

"Come."

I do, and he fucks me thoroughly through each wave. Even once I've finished, he chases his own orgasm for minutes.

By the sounds he's making and the way his hips falter here and there, I can tell he's close, but he wants to make it last. I want to tell him that we have all weekend, to maybe tease him a bit, but I'm so fucked out and incoherent that I couldn't have said a single word if I tried.

So I lay there and take it with a weary smile on my face, ever the whiny, whimpering mess that I am, and patiently wait for the moment he decides to let go.

And when he does, it's the most glorious feeling in the world. I'm tired, yes, but never tired enough to lift myself and wiggle my ass back into him, clenching myself around him and relishing in the way he grunts out my name. He empties himself into me, and I hum, positively satisfied and warm.

Before I know it, I'm sinking down within the comfort of my blankets, and I rest my head in my arms, the pillow still a little too far out of reach. And though I'm content, I still whine out sadly when Spencer retreats and leaves me feeling empty.

I'm about to tell him to get over here and cuddle me when I feel his weight redistribute, and it isn't long before he has his head between my legs, his tongue acting as a net for the cum that drips out of me. He barely touches me, only the tiniest of flicks with the tip of his tongue darting over my skin. I can't tell if I'm thankful because of the relief or if I want the burn to go on forever.

In the end, I don't really have a choice.

He pushes his tongue up, sweeping over my dripping cunt and cleaning me up. Suddenly his mouth is everywhere, making the most delicious sounds and bringing me closer to another orgasm, and all I can do is let it happen. My weary smile is joined by a fluttering pair of eyelids and a string of whimpers that are so small they don't dare drown out the words Spencer is grumbling between my legs.

Some of which, I can hear, sound out, "Another one..."

His finger adds to the mix, coming up and rubbing my clit in tight circles as he finishes cleaning up the mess he made, and within seconds I'm a writhing mess at his undoing.

I'm not sure how long it lasts, only that one second I'm tensing with another orgasm and the next I'm having my limbs moved.

Spencer is beside me in an instant, his face coming into view as I feel my breathing slow to a steadier pace. The longer I wait, the more focused I am on his features, soft and even a little concerned as he strokes some of the hair from my face.

"How are you feeling?"

The smile that beams across my face is just about the most natural thing I'd ever felt. And it seems to bring out those bright glints of adoration in his eyes that only ever serve to make my heart flutter, which makes what I tell him even more true.

"I'm happy."

JULY 27th

Waking up to Spencer next to me, while a daily occurrence these past few days, is still possibly the most surprising and comforting feeling in the world.

Our bodies never part. From the moment we lay down to sleep until the moment we wake up and decide it's time to start doing necessary daily things, not one inch of skin is untouched. Even when showering.

I think back to yesterday morning, where he dragged me out of bed because he had to pee and didn't want to leave me. I was slumped over the backside of his body while he went and then in his arms again while he ran us a shower to wake up.

It brings the widest smile to my face, however sleepy it may also be.

"What are you smiling for?"

I squint one eye open and see that Spencer is staring at me. I hadn't expected him to be awake.

"Just thinking about yesterday..."

He tightens his grip on my waist and pulls me even closer, my face instantly drawn to the crook of his neck. "Mmm," he hums as I nestle in and press a sleepy kiss to the bare skin at the column of his throat. "Which part?"

"Our shower."

I feel his thumb then, rubbing back and forth over my hip as clearly as I can feel him smile against the top of my head. "That was fun, wasn't it..."

"Mhmm," I agree. My lightly tongue traces over his collarbone before I kiss it again. "Our shower is much better equipped for sex than yours."

"So... What you're saying is that shower sex is out of the question this morning?" he confirms with a laugh.

"That's exactly what I'm saying..."

"Well then, princess, what uhh... What alternatives do you think we should try out?"

I start to laugh when he pulls my leg up over his waist and hoists me over on top of him. My face remains buried into his neck, though I trail my lips up and up until I reach his jaw.

"Hmm... What if I just ride you and see where it takes us?"

When my lips finally reach his cheek, Spencer shifts and captures them in a long, butterfly-inducing kiss before pulling away with a smile and brushing the hair from my face. "I think that sounds like a wonderful idea."

It helps that I can already feel him hardening beneath me, and from the moment I felt his hands on me, I'd been aroused.

Though, as soon as I line him up and get ready to start our morning the right way, his phone rings on the bedside table. I'm tempted to keep going, but he half pushes me off of him when he reaches and reads the name.

"It's your mom."

That instantly kills my mood.

With a dramatic sigh and a pout, I hop off of him and curl up under the covers, letting him answer.

"Good morning," he chirps rather happily, and I try not to imagine my moms smile on the other end of the line. Thankfully I can't hear her, but I can still see Spencer smiling as he greets her and goes through all the pleasantries that come with a long distance relationship; I miss yous and how are yous...

I wonder if he really does miss her. He must, at least a little, right?

I'm staring straight ahead now, picking at my nails while I wait for them to finish talking, but something feels off.

I can feel Spencer's eyes on me.

But then he asks, "What are you wearing?" through the phone with a voice so playful and seductive, and I snap my head around, glaring at him.

"Really?" I mouth.

The smirk on his face makes me want to chuck his phone across the room.

"Mmm," he hums, looking me dead in the eye. And the next time he speaks, I swear he's talking directly to me. "Why don't you take it off... I want to talk you through some things..."

I know my mom is hearing the roughness in his voice through the phone, but right now I can see his eyes, hungry as they rake over my body once I slowly peel the blanket away and reveal myself to him, and I know that his main goal isn't to get my mom off.

It's to finish what we started before she'd interrupted.

"Touch yourself for me, baby? Nice and slow. Just relax..."

He softly crawls over to me, keeping the phone to his ear with one hand while the other takes my knees and spreads them apart.

I start to touch myself as instructed, but he swats my hand away and winks, nestling between my legs. I lean up on my elbows and tilt my head, wondering where he's going with this, when he leans his other cheek into my thigh.

"You know what I'd do to you right now If I was there?" A small pause. And then, "I'd use my fingers to slowly stretch you open... Feel you contract around me..."

His fingers do exactly like he says, and I have to stop myself from making any sound. The evil grin growing on his face as he does it all makes it even harder.

"I'd finger-fuck you nice and slow," he continues in a voice just above a whisper. "Until you're begging me for more."

When his eyes meet mine, once more I want to lean forward, snatch his phone, and smash it on the floor. I want him to utterly devour me, without any interruptions or avoidances at getting caught.

But he's such a fucking tease.

Mom must be talking on the other end, because Spencer is silent, slowly fucking me with his fingers and watching them intently as they disappear inside me. Entranced... The thought of her speaking to him and holding his attention makes me jealous— Sure, he's fucking me right now, but really, she's the one calling the shots.

I lean my head back in frustration, letting out the tiniest of whines and grinding my hips up into his hand, hoping and pleading for more.

A low laugh leaves him. "Please, what?"

It's not lost on me that my mom must have asked for more from him at the same time I did... It cements just how absolutely fucked this whole situation is, and yet I can't help but clench around his fingers in earnest, silently pleading with him to go on.

He removes his fingers from me and I sigh out, trying not to disrupt their call.

"And... How would you like me to fuck you?" he asks, looking at me with an evil grin and knowing damn well I can't actually answer.

After he gets her answer, he climbs up on his knees and spreads my legs further, throwing one of them up on his shoulder while he leaves the other on the bed. Since he only has one hand to work with, he gestures to it and I help him out, lifting my other leg up to my chest and holding it with one arm to let him get inside at a good angle.

"Yeah, and how do you want it, baby?" He lines himself up with me and very slowly sinks the head of his cock in, holding it and running his hand along my stomach. "I'm thinking... I'd like to fuck you so slow you're practically writhing beneath me..."

I stick my tongue out at him, and then without warning he slams into me. I bring a hand to my mouth and bite down on my finger, trying not to make a sound.

"You're gonna be patient... And you're gonna let me take my time... Until you're nice and desperate... Whining out for me like a good little whore..."

Each sentence is punctuated with another thrust, hard and deep, followed by a short pause, and it's all I can do not to cry out his name and beg him to go faster.

Mom must be talking on the line again, because Spencer doesn't say a word as he fucks me. His pace doesn't pick up or slow, and his own self control starts to recede—I can see it in his features. I can also feel it in the way his free hand grips my leg. He wants to go faster, he wants to lose control, and this is killing him just as much as it's killing me.

But then he pants into the phone, his voice breaking a little as he pauses and rolls his hips into me, slow and burning. I whine into my hand as quietly as possible, and he asks the question that will seal my fate.

"Where do you want it?"

I wait, clenching around him and praying for the result I want.

And then he laughs. "Yeah? You like when I paint you with my cum, huh?"

I shake my head, silently begging him to resist and stay inside me, but he only shrugs as if to say, Sorry about your luck, and then pulls out, leaving me whiny and desperate.

Just like he said.

And then, he comes all over me, stroking himself fast and hard. Even though I've still yet to feel any sort of relief, seeing him in front of me like this, feeling his warmth dance across my skin in warm spurts, and hearing him groan out as he watches my body gladly accept it all...

It's quite honestly the most satisfying thing I've ever seen.

I can't say I'm not happy, though, when he slumps down and pants, sighing out a few goodbyes to my mom and then tossing his phone on the floor when she hangs up.

He smiles at me then, and I pout.

"You're evil..."

"Mmm, you love it," he drawls, leaning down and starting to dart his tongue over the mess he made on my stomach. Meanwhile his finger finds its way inside me again, and I feel myself start to turn into a writhing mess once more.

And he's right.

I do love it.

JULY 29th

Approaching the front door with Mom in step behind me, knowing that Spencer awaits for her on the other side isn't what makes my heart jump out of my chest.

It's the look on both of their faces when they see each other.

Though I push Mom forward to go see him, it nearly breaks me seeing her run into his arms. He picks her up and spins her around, reminiscent of their little moment at the airport, and the pure happiness on her face specifically makes my stomach twist.

This time it isn't jealousy.

It's guilt.

She's... incredibly happy. I don't think I've ever seen her this happy before. She's positively beaming as she hugs him tight and buries her face into his chest.

And when he looks past her head and looks over at me, I feel it.

The heartache.

Spencer's eyes burn holes into my own, and fill them with a sympathy that makes me feel more wounded than comforted.

I wonder then if he can see it on my face; The way I'm trying not to break down and cry... The way I'm only holding myself together by the weak smile I'm wearing, both to assure him that I'm fine and also to feign happiness for my mother, rather than the aching envy and sadness that festers within every crevice of my soul.

I offer to grab more of Mom's things from the car and dart right back out the door to avoid them for a little while. Maybe to also get some fresh air, even though I'd just been outside less than a minute ago.

After flinging open the trunk of the car, I take a deep breath and squeeze my eyes shut, feeling my chest start to tighten at the realization that I might be starting to fall in love with him.

A man who isn't mine, and who could never be.

———

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[your-daily-biaswrecking]

Hello! can you do a scenario with fem!reader and father's best friend!namjoon? I totally understand if this is a concept you're uncomfortable with. All the armys are going crazy with the dilf!bts concept so I need to have this 😭

Tbh that's a hard concept (like absolutely don't do this irl y'all plss it's not okay if it's not fiction– go in the notes to read my PSA pls) so I had to write a bit of plot at the beginning just because I wanted to make it as less weird as possible lol

Namjoon wasn't the type of family friend you got to see a lot growing up. He was, however, the type of friend you got to hear about a lot. Your dad had spent his high school years being in a band that never really had its break, and Namjoon had apparently been the youngest member and your father's favourite. He kept talking about how he "raised" him, meaning he helped him get his first kiss and taught him about girls. Then your dad got your mum pregnant right after graduating, and they both decided to move to the US to find a job and start their family. Your family. And so your dad lost touch with his best friend.

He talked about him quite often, and you knew he had even visited once when you were still too young to have a memory of it. You had only ever seen a couple of pictures of them together; Namjoon looked like a very cringy 13-year-old with a terrible haircut. Not that your dad as a teenager looked any better. But that's beside the point. It doesn't matter what he looked like back then, today you probably wouldn't be able to even recognize him even if he passed you on the street.

"Did I tell you? My best friend moved here from Korea! The band kids are back together!"

Namjoon came back into your father's life at around the same time as you left it– moved away for college. And you kept getting all these updates on how great it was that they found each other again, how many things they did together and in general how happy your dad was. When you visited home for Christmas, Namjoon was away so you didn't run into him. And almost a year after he had moved there, you would finally meet him during the summer. Your father invited him for dinner one hot evening in July.

You opened the door to find him standing outside, your mother just a step behind to greet him. “Joonie! So glad you could make it. Come on in, come on in... Ah! As you know, this is our daughter.”

The man was tall and handsome, nothing like the pictures you had seen. And familiar. His eyes met yours and he smiled, making your blood run cold— you had seen that man before. Not even a week ago, staring at you at the bar while sipping his whiskey until you decided he was too hot and couldn’t be older than 30, so you walked up to him and gave him a napkin with your number and a lipstick stain of a kiss on it. He never called.

“Wow,” Namjoon said without his tone matching his words. “She has grown up so much.” And he looked you up and down again, checking you out kind of like he had done that night. Your entire face was burning, turning on your heels to get away. What the fuck kind of luck was that? He was your dad's friend? You hoped– you begged that he didn't recognize you. He wasn't saying anything, though his eyes kept on stealing looks, and so you thought you might have had a close escape. Until you run into each other in the kitchen. Alone. "Come here, young lady," he said in a deep voice that sent shivers down your spine. You already felt like you were in trouble. "Does your father know you go around giving your number to men almost twice your age?"

He was so close, eyes travelling lazily down your form with a smirk on his lips. "No," you choked. "I– I don't– You were staring at me, that's why I thought..."

"I was staring at you because I was trying to figure out if you were my best friend's daughter."

Hearing him say the words made your cheeks burn. Defeat. He had a logical excuse and all you had was that he was a little too much your type. And he sounded like he was scolding you, reminding you of your place. You lowered your head, really wanting to get out. "Please don't tell him."

Don't tell him I hit on you. Don't tell him I wanted to fuck you.

Namjoon didn't reply right away, but late that night you got a text from an unknown number. "I won't tell him anything."

He won't tell him anything. Perhaps that could be applied to what had already happened, or what would happen in the future.

You didn't text frequently, but you did nonetheless. And even though you were sure both of you would say they were simple, innocent texts, how innocent could they really be when the man already knew how you felt about him? Maybe you were crazy, but you thought he might like you too. Maybe he liked the fact that you liked him. It wasn't evident in anything he did or say, just the vibes you got from him those days he visited your house, or the way he looked at you when you were left alone for a second. The summer passed by so fast when every other day you met your father's best friend in one way or another.

When it was time for you to move back to the city where you attended college, Namjoon just so happened to be going there for some work too. And your parents were grateful that you had someone to travel with. The car ride was long and mostly silent. You had never been left alone for so long and suddenly you realised how hard it was to keep a conversation going without talking about how horny he made you feel just by being in the same, tight space with you. But the farther away you got from home, the less you cared about keeping your good reputation up.

"Where will you sleep tonight?" you asked him after he helped drop off all your stuff at your apartment late that night and was already at the door, ready to leave.

"I'll find a hotel," he told you, hand still on the door handle.

"You can stay here if you want to."

"Don't–" His plea was soft-spoken, in contrast to the intense way his eyes were piercing yours.

"Don't what?" you acted dumb. "All I'm saying is I'm sure dad would rather you stay instead of paying for a room. You're like family, anyway."

You noticed how he took in a deep breath, grip around the knob getting harder. "Don't bring him into this."

Saying that you two shouldn't mention your father was like admitting what was going on right now was beyond innocent. And even though your stomach clenched at his harsh tone, you bowed your head and whispered. "I'm sorry."

"This is so wrong," you heard him call loudly all of a sudden, making you look back at him. He was chewing on his lip desperately. "I was there when your dad got your mom pregnant. Do you know what I said? Fuck, man, how are you gonna get out of this bullshit? I shouldn’t be…"

You blinked at him, waiting to hear the end of the sentence. "Shouldn't be what?" You weren't gonna let him slip away that easily. You would push him until he had to say what he wanted to say. It was your only chance, anyway.

Namjoon sighed. He pushed the door closed and walked up to you steadily all while he was staring straight into your eyes. "Why did you give me your number that night?"

Your breathing was already getting heavier. You wouldn't back away. What was the point? He knew already. "Because you were hot. And I wanted you to fuck me."

He chewed his lip for a few seconds, watching your face as he contemplated his next words. "Why do you want me to stay over tonight?"

You gulped. He was so close, closer than ever. "Because you're hot," you whispered. Glance down on his lips. "And I want you to fuck me."

He closed his eyes momentarily before he was exhaling loudly. "Fucking– hell!"

And he instantly moved forward, one hand grabbing the back of your head as he brought your face to crush on his, mouths smashing against each other after all the times you had dreamed about it. It was so much better than you could have imagined, lips full and soft parting yours for his tongue to slip in between, making you moan. And you were trying to get closer and closer, almost tripping as you walked blindly further into the apartment. His jacket was discarded on the floor before your shirt joined it, and Namjoon was growling before attacking your neck with his teeth.

"Daddy..." The word truly slipped out of you, and he was pausing for a moment, pulling away to look at you.

"Really? You're really gonna call me daddy?" Your eyes were wide and cheeks burning, squirming away from him before he grabbed your wrist to keep you close. "Shit," he grunted, not sounding mad at all. "Alright, baby. Show daddy where your room is, need to get you in bed right away."

And you mewled at his words. You were there in no time, pulling the rest of your clothes off as Namjoon undressed too. Big and thick, he was even hotter like that, making you press your legs together as you took the sight in. And when he removed his boxers too, you got to found out his dick matched the rest of his body perfectly, long and thick and so hot it made your mouth water.

"Daddy," you whined as he started crawling over you. "You're so big. You're gonna tear me apart."

His large hand grabbed your jaw. "That's what you get for playing with big boys." And he kissed you ruthlessly again. His other hand travelling down your form until he found your pussy, fingers playing with your folds and humming in satisfaction. "So wet. Is that all for me, baby?"

"Yes, daddy," you moaned, hips trying to grind on his hand for some more friction. "I've been wet for you since I first saw you."

"Fuck. I know, baby," he breathed into your ear, two fingers slipping slowly inside you and stretching you out. "I could tell. You weren't hiding it very well, baby. How much you wanted me to ruin you. Which is why daddy's been hard for you all this time, too." Your breath was hitching as he was moving his hands slowly, not even trying to fuck you like that, just trying to get you ready for his cock. And he stopped. "Are you gonna let daddy fuck you raw, baby?"

You almost screamed. "Fuck, yes, daddy, please! Fuck me open with your cock."

Namjoon was growling as he retrieved his fingers from inside you. "What a dirty mouth! Who taught you to speak like that, you dirty, little whore? I thought you were a good girl."

Your nails were scratching his back as you whined and squirmed underneath him. "Oh, daddy, please! I need you! I'll be good for you."

And you felt the tip of his dick press against your entrance as he shushed you. "Alright then. Be a good girl for daddy and take this big cock like the good, little slut you are." And he shoved himself in you.

"O–oh my god!" you yelped. Namjoon didn't go easy on you, didn't go slow or gentle, he started pounding you fast and hard right away, truly fucking you open like you had asked him to. You were squirming underneath him but his body was so big and strong, it was caging you completely. And just to shut you up he kissed you again, tongue so deep in your mouth he was choking you. Namjoon was fucking you so hard he brought tears to your eyes, and you felt euphoric being used by him like that.

"My dirty, little cunt," he rasped after he freed your mouth. "Like taking my cock like that?" You were nodding, mewling, unable to speak. "What a good girl. Letting daddy fuck her as hard as he wants." He leaned back, grabbing your arms until he had your wrists pinned above your head and the new position gave him the ability to piston his hips against yours even faster, diving even deeper.

"Fuck, daddy, I'm gonna cum," you cried, legs shaking as they fought against his abusing thrusts between them.

"So easy," Namjoon panted with a smirk. "So easy to please you. Gonna cum cuz you've never had dick like daddy's before, huh? No one's ever fucked you this good? Those little boys your age, I bet they don't know shit about pleasing a nasty girl like you." He spat on his free hand and brought it right down on your clit, pressing on it hard. And you were moaning even louder. "There you go, baby. You can cum on daddy's dick now."

"Namjoon–" you yelped, and you felt your orgasm pop, gushing all your juices over him as he kept fucking you through it. He slowed down a bit, coming down to kiss you sloppily as you continued to whine with each thrust against your sensitive, tight walls.

"That's my good girl," he whispered, kissing you almost lovingly. "Don't worry, baby. We're not nearly done yet." And his thrusts slowly got deeper and deeper. "You really shouldn't have let me fuck you, baby. Cuz now I don't ever plan on stopping."

Masterlist | Part 2

[the-passenger-if]

A prompt for the angst but!! How would the ros deal/treat/react to a newman that had frequent panic attacks? (If your comfortable answering, and no ones asked before) I imagine since the whole reason we're on earth is because we're trying to hide from this eldritch diety who wants to inhale us whole, and to top it all off newman doesnt even have enough energy to leave. That would cause any being an extreme of stress and anxiety. Especially after Tzr'nekre actually finally locates us

combining it with

if its not too spoilery, how would the ROs react to the MC waking up from a nightmare (say, one in which the RO got possessed by tzr'nekre?) and MC just clings to them, crying, after waking up, and refusing to explain but its obvious they had a terrible nightmare?

This isn’t what Fiama imagined when she was awaken by Newman’s warm face pressing against her breasts, ragged breathing and all. She wants to grab a hold of their head, hold them there, but as her hand brushes their cheek, she finds it damp. Maybe with sweat, maybe with tears.

“Baby?” she asks in a hushed whisper. “Baby, what’s wrong?”

The only reply she gets is a stuttering intake of breath. And then her partner’s arms are sneaking around her—one under her neck, the other around her waist—and Newman is squeezing her tight.

Fiama is strong, she has always been. Her mother once told her—not in kind terms—that she truly took after her father’s sisters; their arms, made to keep children from ripping one another’s eyes out, their legs to carry drunken husbands back home. Now, trapped in Newman’s strong embrace, she feels like the type of dainty, unobtrusive creature her mom wished she had grown into.

She takes a deep breath—as deep as she's able to within her lover’s tight grip—and tries again. “Babe… you’re… crushing me.”

The hold eases up an instant later, but Newman doesn’t let go. They bury their wet face in Fiama’s neck, still silent. It’s alarming to say the least, but she keeps her voice calm. “Are you hurting?” Newman shakes their head. “Are you sad?” She hugs them, feels them shaking in her arms—Newman doesn’t shake like this. “Are you scared?” She didn’t want to sound so flabbergasted (so ‘judgy’ her mother would say) but she can’t help it.

Once again, Newman doesn’t answer, but they do bury their face deeper into Fiama. It takes her by surprise; they have always seemed so unaffected by everything…

She hugs them tight and says the only thing she can think of, “I’m here, babe. And I’ll always be. I don’t know what or who is making you feel like this, but you aren’t alone. I’m with you.” She kisses the top of their head, murmuring every promise she knows she can keep.

A few minutes later, Newman is fast asleep again.

---

Sleeping next to another person in a bed that wasn’t made to be shared by two adults is uncomfortable, but it was late and Newman hadn’t brought their bike, ignoring that Joaquin’s car was at the shop, and Lucia had taken hers that night.

It’s ok, Jonny thinks to himself while he stares at the ceiling, we’ll just wait until my folks leave for work tomorrow. It doesn’t have to get awkward for anyone.

When was the last time he’d shared a bed? Probably when he was around twelve and Quino got scared by a storm and woke him up in the middle of the night, cold hands slipping under the sheets and touching the back of his neck. Dumbass always did the same thing, no matter how many times Jonny punched him to dissuade him. Of course Jonny could never stay mad at his twin for long, and they would share the bed in the end—Jonny grousing about Quino’s cold hands and Quino whining about Jonny hogging the covers.

As if invoking his brother, he feels hands around his neck now; cold, sweaty hands. Even though they don't belong to Quino, the way they’re clinging to him is pretty reminiscent of the way his twin used to squeeze him whenever lightning stroke too close.

“Are you ok?” he asks stupidly. Of course they aren’t; Newman is scared. “What is it?” he tries again, but Newman says nothing, they only keep tightening their grasp around Jonny. He takes their hands and tries to free himself. “Newman, you’re going to choke me.”

Slowly, those cold fingers loosen, giving him a chance to sit up.

“Don’t go!”

“Hush,” Jonny hisses. “Damn it, Newman. Remember we aren’t alone.” He takes the hand that is now gripping the front of his shirt and tries to hold it, but Newman doesn’t budge. “Please,” he whispers.

“Don’t go,” it’s the barely audible plea he gets as a reply.

“I won’t,” he assures them. After another second, Newman lets go, and Jonny takes the hand and gently rubs it between his. “Come here,” he whispers, and Newman doesn’t need to be told twice. They get between his legs and rest on their side and against Jonny’s chest. Jonny takes the covers and pulls them over both of them, and there, with an arm around Newman’s shoulder, he can feel their muscles begin to slowly relax.

---

Roach didn’t usually do this; lying down in bed while their conquests sleep. They had realized that there was so much one could do to pass the time, and watching people drooling was amusing just the first dozen times.

They turn another page of the magazine they stole from that gas station three towns over, the one with the old, balding clerk that had given Roach the evil eye from the moment they dared to set a foot in his territory.

The light is off but that’s ok because Roach doesn’t need it to read, the same way they don’t need it to sneak glances at Newman’s sleeping form. It’s something they do, they tell themself, to pass the time, and not because Newman’s face is nice to look at or anything like that. They aren’t expecting to find their companion awake the next time they look their way, least of all with a terrified look set on their face.

Roach opens their mouth to ask what’s going on, but the words die out as they are wrapped in a tight embrace. The fact that they were so distracted by Newman’s expression that their reflexes vanished for a hot minute, says something. Something Roach doesn’t want to acknowledge right now, so they don’t. Instead, they let their body go limp in Newman’s arms, let them squeeze and squash until they seem to come out of their trance.

“R-Roach?”

“Yes?” they ask in return.

“Are you… ok?”

Roach wriggles to put some distance between Newman and them—as much as their companion’s steel grip allows, anyway—and runs a hand over Newman’s face, wiping off the sweat. “Just a couple broken ribs,” they say, “I’ll live. What about you? What had you panicking like this?”

Newman retracts from those words like a shy snail. It really takes Roach by surprise. They can’t think of many things that might scare Newman, which at least makes the list of suspects quite short.

“Hey,” they whisper in a way that they hope sounds both unaffected and reassuring, “I would know, remember? There’s only you and me here, no third roommate. You can relax.”

Their words, true as they are, do very little to calm Newman down, so Roach sighs and nuzzles against their jaw. “Squeeze away then,” they mutter and kiss Newman’s skin. “I’ll be the prettiest stress ball you’ll ever have.”

---

It isn’t a gentle awakening. Horizon’s muddled thoughts crash into one another as the Domini unsuccessfully tries to slip away from the tight embrace they are being subjected to. What’s going on? their mind asks, half asleep, half panicking.

Memories from last night come back to them as if slogging through a swamp; they remember having dinner with Newman, chatting and somehow ending up in bed together. They remember the tenderness of the moment, the way they felt like they could melt as Newman and they cuddled together...

Horizon strains their neck trying to look over their shoulder, but even with the rays of moonlight seeping through the window, the only thing they have an eyeful of it’s their own dark curls. Newman’s chest is pressed against Horizon’s back and now that the Domini is fully awake, they can feel the other’s racing heartbeat. It scares Horizon, it makes them want to ask what’s going on, what happened to Newman, what, what, what…

They fight those urges. They take a deep breath, find one of Newman’s hands and softly cover it with theirs. “You are in my cabin,” they whisper, “you are in ranch 48, in Luna Ridge. We had diner and I asked you to spend the night. Remember that?”

There’s a long pause, then Horizon feels them nodding against their back. A couple seconds later the iron grip eases up. It gives the Domini a chance to turn around, and very gently press their forehead against Newman’s damp one. “Deep breaths,” they whisper and then are doing just that, hoping Newman will follow their example. An instant later, they are.

Feeling Newman’s muscles relax as they get their breathing under control brings a smile to the Domini’s face.

[soulmate-game]

Well, here is the stupid thing I was alluding to. It’s mostly a filler chapter, but yeah.

Harley’s Plea for Help, Chapter 3

“Well, that took a while,” a relatively deep female voice smoothly drawled. The plants placed right next to the window pulled away, no longer blocking the pathway inside. The two figures who were perched right outside the windowsill took the invitation and climbed inside, the shorter of the two looking at the woman who had spoken and smiling widely.

“Auntie Ivy!” Marinette happily exclaimed, making the redhead across from her grin back.

“That’s me. It sure is nice to actually see you in person, little Marigold,” she held out her arms for a hug, which Marinette instantly ran in to accept. “Video calls are never quite enough, are they? You’re so tiny! Are you sure you eat alright?”

“Auntie Ivyyyyyy,” Marinette whined, knowing full well that Ivy was just teasing her.

“So, what took you all so long?” Ivy asked Red Hood, even as she kept her arms wrapped around her soon-to-be daughter in law. “Usually you bats are all about getting back on the streets to punch people, we didn’t think you’d be bringing her in at almost one in the morning.”

Hood shrugged, thumbs hooked in his pockets. “Your little garden fairy nearly gave us the slip. Went straight out the back exit instead of doin’ anything showy like we half expected and we almost missed her.”

“I stopped as soon as I noticed who they were, I swear!” Marinette pulled away from Ivy, holding her hands up in mock surrender. “I didn’t expect Momma to send them to babysit me before our first full day being in Gotham. In hindsight, though, I really should have.”

“Yeah, you should’ve,” Ivy agreed with a smirk, ruffling Marinette’s hair and making her pigtails go a little crooked. “And I know for a fact that you’ve done some stunts off your balcony back in Paris, so at least I know you can be responsible and hold yourself back from doing the same here. Must get that from me, because we both know it doesn’t come from Harley.”

Marinette and Hood both had to laugh at that. Being responsible was definitely not a trait that Marinette could have inherited from anybody in her family tree, that was for sure.

“Are ya makin’ fun of me in front of my daughter?” the comically scandalized voice announced the arrival of one Harley Quinn, who walked into the room in white onesie pajamas with a poker print on them. All of the “joker” cards were crossed out heavily with red sharpie, and a few of them had black-sharpie devil horns and handlebar mustaches vandalizing them. Marinette even caught one such card with a googly eye on it, the matching eye having fallen off and leaving only a small circle of since-dried hot glue where it used to be. “If you guys are gonna be that way, fine! Ivy dyes her hair!”

“No she doesn’t,” Marinette deadpanned, clearly fighting against a giant grin. The corners of her lips gave her away, they never stopped twitching with repressed mirth. “But you do. I got the pictures to prove—- aah!” Harley tackled her daughter to the ground, attacking her with tickles immediately.

“Take it back! My hair is naturally blond!”

“Yeah, naturally— hahahahaha! Sandy blonde! You— hahaha! Have just as much brown— stop I can’t breathe! hahahaha!— as yellow!”

“Hmph,” Harley finally backed off, crossing her eyes and looking away from Marinette with an exaggerated pout. “How dare you reveal my darkest secret?”

“I was a natural redhead even before I got my powers,” was all Ivy had to say, looking all too amused at this turn of events. “Your original costume completely covered your hair.”

“Don’t worry, Harley,” Red Hood butted in, reminding the three girls that he was still here. His tone suggested that he was definitely smiling under his helmet. “We found out about your hair dye years ago.”

“I just cover up the brown parts! It’s not like I’m changin’ much,” she argued before standing up again. “Thanks for gettin’ my cupcake back safely, little birdie. Oh, that's right! I made cupcakes! Hang on, lemme grab one for your trip back!” with that, she span on her heels and ran back further into the apartment. Marinette dashed over to Hood, immediately shoving him to the window.

“Quick, save yourself! Momma can’t bake for her life!” she whispered urgently. “I’ll say you were called away for an emergency, just hurry!”

“It’s not even a lie, getting away from Harley’s baking is an emergency,” Ivy agreed, waving as the vigilante took their advice and fled. It was only three seconds later that Harley slid back into the room, nearly falling due to the feet of her onesie having pretty much zero friction. Her face immediately fell when she saw that her victim was gone, leaving her standing there with a cupcake that was about twice as much frosting as actual cake, covered in sprinkles like a kid’s craft project that was smothered in glitter. The frosting was also shapeless, just heaped on the cake like a half-melted scoop of ice cream. She sighed in despair.

“There goes my chance of giving a bat diabetes. You guys warned him, didn’t ya?”

They both nodded shamelessly. “We’re not that cruel, Harley,” Ivy defended, getting up from her spot on her cushioned armchair and wrapping an arm around her fiance’s waist before she kissed the top of her head gently. “Hood got our little Marigold back safe and sound, and he’s even started a garden at his apartment. He doesn’t deserve to be poisoned by you.”

“I thought you said he got a single cactus at the flea market last month,” Harley deadpanned, making Ivy shrug.

“Might as well be a garden for him, and it’s something he’s not likely to kill so that’s a plus to me. He’s actually taking really good care of the little baby.”

“Speaking of garden!” Marinette gently took the sad excuse of a pastry away from her mom and sat it down on a side table before ushering both of them over to the living room and onto the sofa. “My garden back home is growing so big, I don’t think I can keep everything much longer. I barely have room to walk on the terrace, with all the vines and leaves and branches. Got any ideas of what I can do?”

“Of course! Do you have pictures, Marigold?”

—*—*—*—*—*

Slipping back through her hotel window at six in the morning was risky, since it involved climbing the wall and hoping nobody saw, but her classmates were so unpredictable that it was the only way she could be sure nobody would find out that she had violated curfew and snuck out. Of course, having Red Robin waiting outside her mom’s apartment’s terrace to escort her back helped. At least she knew that no street cams would record her comings or goings, and his grappling hook made the whole scale-the-hotel-wall business much more efficient.

Once she was inside, she sighed happily. “Thanks, now—“ her apology was cut off as Red Robin held up a finger to tell her to wait.

“Hold that thought, be right back. Don’t move.”

Thinking, rightfully, that something was wrong, Marinette obeyed. She watched Red Robin leap off of her hotel balcony and disappear into the streets. Immediately, she began a search to make sure her room had been left untampered— everything important had been packed in the backpack that she had taken to her mom’s place, but still. Could never be too careful. By the time she finished checking for bugs or any signs of snooping, Red Robin landed back on her balcony.

“Here we go.”

Turning to face him, Marinette opened her mouth to ask what the problem had been— only to tear up a little and walk over to the vigilante.

“Oh, my hero. Truly, my one and only savior. Knight in shining red Kevlar. I’m running on two hours of sleep and you have read my mind!” The pigtailed drama queen eagerly took the coffee that he offered her, and he sipped from a larger cup that looked like he had grabbed it from the same place. Marinette almost instantly sighed in gratitude when the hot drink lightly scalded her tongue. This. This was the elixir of life.

To his credit, Red Robin was able to restrain himself to merely an amused smirk. Probably because he was running on just as little sleep as she was. “Sorry it’s only a small, I figured it was best to have something you could finish quickly and easily hide the evidence for. If you need more caffeine, I happen to know that Wayne Enterprises has a very good coffee shop in their main hall. You’ll be touring there today, right?” He asked, taking another sip as he waited for the answer that he already knew.

Marinette nodded absently, drinking in the euphoria of her coffee as she tried to both savor it yet finish it as quickly as safely possible. When she came up for air, she said; “Yeah, that’s right. We’re touring Wayne Enterprises for most of the day, having lunch there, and leaving for dinner after the tour. Then we have a visit to the Gotham Museum of Fine Art, and we’ll stay there until about eight-thirty before heading back to the hotel.”

Red Robin nodded, then turned and looked out the window at the slowly rising sun. Sunrise was always a bit later in Gotham, partly because of the abundance of high-rises and partly because of the thick cloud cover and ever-present fog on the edges of the city making everything seem darker than it should have been. He had to be at work soon himself, which is why he had been chosen to escort her to the hotel in the first place, but that meant that he had to be heading off.

“Alright. We arranged for a bodyguard we trust to keep an eye on your class during the WE tour, but he doesn't know who you are or that we’re the ones who asked. We’re still in the process of arranging someone to shadow you after the tour, but we’ll tell you about that once it’s solidified. Until then, follow the usual self-defense procedures if you suspect anyone of following you. You have the panic button we gave you?”

Marinette nodded, gulping down the last of her coffee and carefully putting it in her room’s tiny trash can. “Got it. Thanks, again. Seriously,” she met his eyes— or, probably did since they were hidden behind that weird white film that the whole Batfam had covering the eyeholes of their masks. “I mean it. For listening to me, for listening to Mom. It means a lot. I’ll keep the panic button on me, and I’ll use it if I think I can’t handle a situation on my own. I’ll cooperate with the people you get to watch over the class, and I’ll do my best to not get into any trouble. No promises, but I’ll do my best,” she maintained eye contact until Red Robin nodded, hiding his expression behind his coffee cup. After a second, he cleared his throat.

“Well then. We’ll contact you once we have anything to say about your intel. Until then, I gotta go. And by the way?”

Marinette tilted her head curiously as Red Robin paused for just a moment on her balcony railing, aiming a smirk back at her. “Yeah?”

“Welcome to Gotham.”

And if she couldn’t help but smile widely as he grappled off into the fog-veiled sunrise? Well, only she had to know. She wasted no time closing and locking the glass balcony door, and pulling the curtains over it completely. Once that was done, she couldn’t help but do a little shimmy of Joy. She was caffeinated, she met Auntie Ivy in person for the first time, she got to sleep next to her momma— and she was in Gotham! Technically her hometown— or town she was conceived in? Didn’t matter. Point was, even with the chaos and dark energy clouding the very air, she couldn’t help but feel like she belonged in that city. Like that was where she was always meant to end up, where she could thrive and the environment that she was made to thrive in. The environment that she was born to start fixing.

She beamed at herself in her bathroom mirror as she gave herself one more once-over. Yeah, so far her visit to Gotham was going much better than she could have hoped. Now, she just had to make sure it stayed that way.

Three businesslike raps sounded against the door to her room, just in time for Marinette to feed Tikki one more cookie and straighten her purse on her shoulder. Madame Mendelieve’s voice called out from the other side of the door in her usual no-nonsense bark;

“Dupain-Cheng! Room check! It’s time to get up, we’re meeting down in the lobby in ten minutes.”

Marinette ran up to the door, not quite able to contain her energy, and swung it open with her trademark large, beaming smile.

“Way ahead of you, Madame Mendelieve!”

Her science teacher blinked, adjusting her glasses on her nose as if she couldn’t quite believe what she was seeing.

“Ah. You’re already awake and ready?”

Marinette giggled and nodded. “Yup! I was so excited for the tour that I could barely sleep! Does the hotel breakfast include free coffee?”

—*—*—*—*—*

The hotel breakfast did, in fact, include coffee. What it did not include, however, was free coffee that Marinette could reasonably stomach. Especially after the heaven in a cup that Red Robin had gotten for her earlier, the watered down motor oil in the hotel lobby had been unbearable. She had barely managed two sips before regretfully throwing the rest away. Which is what brought her to stand in line at the very same coffee shop that Red Robin had mentioned was in the main hall of Wayne Enterprises, as the rest of her class mingled and waited for their teachers to check their tour group in and their tour guide to arrive.

“Hmm. Sorry, this is my first time ordering here,” she apologized when she reached the counter, gaining a slight lopsided grin from the barista at the register. “Um, I usually like strong coffee, with a lot of caffeine, but I also like something sweet. I don’t need anything too complicated though, do you have any recommendations?”

The barista gave her a customer service smile that seemed just a tad softer at the edges than usual. “Sure! So, we can add an extra shot or two of espresso to any of our drinks, to make it stronger and give it an extra kick. If you’re looking for good sweet flavors, the classics are our white chocolate or caramel. But we also have a seasonal syrup right now that I personally love, which is our cinnamon butterscotch. Did you wanna try that?”

Marinette smiled widely. “That sounds delicious! Then, if I could have your largest size café latte, hot, with… two extra shots and that syrup? Does that sound good?”

The barista actually let loose a soft laugh, already keying in the order. “If you’re a coffee lover and a sweet tooth at the same time, then you’ll love it. If not, come back during your tour’s lunch break and I’ll make you something else.”

Marinette made a little more small talk as she handed over the proper cash for the order, and grabbed her drink after just another minute’s wait. She turned around, taking a sip of the unsurprisingly heavenly coffee and started off to join her class.

Only to realize none of them were where she had left them. She sighed, starting to reach into her purse to see if anyone had texted her about where they were going, but a heavy presence stopped her. She could feel him approaching from in front of her, slightly to her right, but she couldn’t hear him at all. On guard, she straightened up and turned to observe the potential threat.

A security guard. Marinette blinked, running over what she had been told earlier that morning. Was he..?

He seemed to notice her instinctually defensive posture because he raised his hands to show he meant no harm. “Sorry, didn’t mean to catch you off guard,” he apologized. “I’m the guard that was assigned to your tour group. I offered to stay behind until you got your coffee while the rest of your group went ahead and got the run-down on all the boring rules and whatnot of the tour. Figured you’d already know everything they had to say anyway, you’re the class president right?”

Marinette relaxed her posture, nodding and sending the man a relieved smile. “Yeah, that’s right. Well, that explains why they left without me then. Usually Madame Mendelieve is strict about following rules though, how’d you convince her to go on without me?”

The man chuckled, jerking his head to show that she should follow him as he began to lead the way to a side door. Marinette kept her guard up just in case, but wasn’t too worried. If nothing else, she was still in the middle of a super crowded building and the other security guards around didn’t seem concerned. She could easily yell for help if she needed to.

“Well, can’t you tell it was my devilish charm?” He teased, grinning. He waited until she rolled her eyes to continue; “but really, I’m like a second tour guide. She made me show a lotta proof that I’m actually assigned to you guys and not just faking it, not that I can blame her. Eventually she saw the logic in my suggestion and agreed. See, there they are,” he pointed casually ahead of them in the large side hallway they had entered. Sure enough, near the end of the hallway was her class at what looked to be the tail-end of a standard rules-and-guidelines speech from the tour guide. “By the way,” the guard spoke up again, holding his hand out. “My name’s Jason. You’ll be seeing me more often, since I’m supposed to guard you guys for all of your visits to the Tower. Call me if you need help with anything, ‘kay kid?”

Marinette grinned, now positive that this guy really was the guard that Red Robin had said was assigned to her class. She switched the hand she was holding her coffee in so that she could properly grab Jason’s hand for a shake.

“Got it, Monsieur Jason. Let’s both hope I don’t end up needing your help though, I think that would be easier on both of us,” she joked, earning a chuckle from the large man. And— yeah, now that she was relaxed, he really was big, wasn’t he? Then again, Marinette didn’t always realize when people were a bit larger or more buff than they should be. Living with her dad had seriously skewed her perception of the normal size of an adult male (which, she learned when she was seven, most definitely was not almost seven feet tall and muscled enough to make a pro wrestler jealous). But she would like to think she had gotten better in that aspect, and Jason was definitely a big guy. A little over six feet tall, she thought, and though the guard outfit hid a good portion of his physique, she could tell he carried enough muscle to do serious damage if he wanted to.

With a wave, she left him to join her class and sipped at her latte. She had figured that the Bat Clan’s criteria for civilians that they would put to guard her class had to be high, but now she had to wonder just how high. Most police officers or security guards were fit, sure, but not like Jason. Casting a quick glance back at him, she confirmed that he had quite a few faded but visible scars. Again, more than your average officer even for Gotham. Who had they tasked with her class’ safety, exactly?

An elbow in her side distracted her from her thoughts, forcing her to blink and stop her cup from going back to her lips. The grin of none other than Adrien Agreste greeted her when she snapped out of her own head long enough to pay attention to her surroundings. He jerked his head to indicate that the class was already starting to move off.

“Come on, Mari or you’ll get left behind again,” he teased. She grinned back at him, rolling her eyes but falling into step beside him as they followed at the back of their class. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you were gonna marry that coffee. You haven’t zoned out that badly in years,” his tone was light and cheery, but Marinette didn’t miss the concern in his emerald eyes. She sighed, gently bumping her shoulders against his in silent reassurance.

“I’m fine. Just didn’t get much sleep last night, that’s all. But this really is good coffee. Elixir of the gods,” then, just to provoke him, she took a giant gulp of the still steaming hot drink. Adrien grimaced in pained sympathy even though Marinette didn’t seem affected at all.

“Oww, Marineeeeeeeeeette,” he whined. “Don’t do that, my throat hurts just watching you guzzle hot coffee like that,” he complained, rubbing at his neck to make his point clear.

“Wimp,” she teased, unrepentant. Adrien just groaned dramatically.

“I’m not a wimp, you’re just concerningly used to burning your throat from the inside out,” he accused. “Anyway, how’d it go?” He was being deliberately vague, but it was obvious to her what he meant. He was only one she had told about visiting her mom, after all, just in case she needed a quick getaway.

In fact, he was the only one of her friends that she had even told about her biological parents. Alix knew too, but only because of time shenanigans. Marinette was fine with it now, but still.

“It went great,” she smiled widely at him, keeping her voice low but casual. “If I have a chance, I’ll introduce you sometime during the trip. I have a feeling you’ll love Auntie Selina, but I have to meet her first. All I have so far are stories.”

“Fair enough,” Adrien agreed easily. “But you don’t have to, you know that right? I’d love to meet your family, but I’m also fine just being your pseudo-brother like I have been up until now. I know it might be a bit… uncomfortable, for you.”

“Nah,” Marinette shrugged. “Nerve wracking, maybe. But that’s also about half the things that I do in my life period, anxiety is no joke. I’ll catastrophize for a while, but I know you’ll love them and they’ll love you.”

“Sounds like they have paw-some taste,” he didn’t even miss a beat with his puns, earning a playful glare for his efforts.

“Never mind. You’re a heathen. Disowned. Who are you?”

“Mariiiiii,” he whined, causing them both to laugh for a while before focusing on the tour.

So far, so good, Marinette thought.

—*—*—*—*—*

Part 1 Part 2

@emotionalsupportginger @alysrose-starchild @emistar0 @kibastray @justanotherfanficlovinbitch @alyssadeliv @blackroserelina @blackstarlight-co @readingalldaysleepingallnight @maanae @aespades @jaybird-and-co @fleursroses @probably-a-hologram @misterpianoman @deathssilentapproach-blog @user00000003 @frieddonutsweets @blur-of-colours @prettylittlebutterflie @ladyqnoirr @a-star-with-a-human-name @mizzy-pop @laurcad123 @dorkus-minimus @chocolatecatstheron @tazanna-blythe @golden-promises @literaryhiraeth @asrainterstellar @hewantedbeefintheparkinglot @miraculous-trinity-leo @missanalysis @lovelyautumnsunflower @lolieg @ann0631 @whitetiger1249 @meow-now @toodaloo-kangaroo

[demigodreading]

Saving Mini Benson Pt:1

Request: From @youngjusticeimaginesus​:  Hi, I was wondering If maybe you'd be willing to do a oneshot where Olivia's daughter gets kidnapped by Lewis instead of Olivia?

Summary: That’s right my favorite peoples... This is going to be a two part mini series because there was no way everything that I needed to say could be done in a one-shot! I won’t go into much because I don’t want to give it away but please note THIS PART IS A DOOZY! The next one may be worse but still this arc made me cry in the show and I cried writing this

Characters: Olivia Benson, Fin Tutuola, Amanda Rollins, Nick Amaro, William Lewis, Donald Cragen, Reader

Relationships: Olivia Benson x Daughter! Reader

Warnings: MAJOR Violence, Guns, Cigarette Burns, Episode Spoilers, Alcohol, Smoking Weed, Mentions of Shootings, Death, William Lewis, Mentions of torture... (I Think that covers it but if it doesn’t please let me know)

Word Count: 2320 (Like I said.. there was no way this was gonna be just a oneshot.)

And with that all being said: Let’s jump into it.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Olivia and her daughter rarely fought but when they did neither one wanted to admit the other one was right. Olivia loved and hated her daughter for being so similar to her. Even now as she watched the miniature version of herself stalk the interview room the exact same way she would send her heart racing. Usually the similarities would result in a smile but not today. Today Olivia’s vision was a deep red as she confronted her daughter.

“Y/N you were caught smoking weed underneath the bleachers during class! So not only did you break one rule you broke two!” Olivia shouted, folding her arms.

“Wow glad that you know how to count,” Y/N mumbled looking out the window.

“What did you just say to me?”

“Look mom I just don’t get what the big deal is? It was one joint. One class!” Y/N retorted, throwing her hands up, “I am a straight A student who has a full ride scholarship to Harvard.”

“Yes, because Barba stuck his neck out on the line for you and put in a glowing recommendation,” Olivia spat, “What you did was careless. You could have ruined everything that was given to you.”

“You know for once in your life could you ever be fucking proud of me! I do everything that I can do to make you proud and yet at the end of the day I am never fucking good enough for you.”

“That’s not…” Olivia went to argue but was interrupted by Cragen opening the door.

“Olivia we got a problem. I need you right now,” He said, then shut the door without waiting for an answer.

“Just go save another poor unfortunate soul mom. Don’t worry about your daughter.  I’ll pick up my own pieces like I always do,” Y/N said, wiping tears from her face as she grabbed her coat.

Y/N stormed from the room before Olivia could stop her. She made her way through the precinct eyes trained to the floor as her mother’s voice rang out, “You better head straight home Y/N!  We are not done having this conversation and you are grounded!”

Choosing not to say anything, Y/N merely raised her hand in the air flipping her mother off before the doors shut with a loud slam behind her. Tears made dark spots on the concrete as Y/N made her way back to their apartment. Even the noises of the constant car honks and people screaming couldn’t drown out the voices in her head today. Failure. Waste of space. Stupid. No one. Unwanted. Unloved. 

It was the repeated song that kept her feet moving forward until she finally placed her key in the lock. She threw her bag by the kitchen island and threw her keys on the counter. She was about to turn on the living room light when a noise caught her attention. 

“Hello? Hello?”

As she turned the corner her vision was filled with the sight of a gun pointed right at her temple. A smirk crossed William Lewis’ face as he looked at Y/N, “Ah welcome home Little Benson. I was hoping that it would be your mother who was walking through the door but I guess you will have to do.”

Y/N went to scream but instead Lewis jammed the gun against her throat, “I wouldn’t do that if I were you. One small slip of my finger and your mom will be left with a new kind of art all over her walls.”

Y/N let a single tear roll down her face before Lewis’ gun made contact with her skull and the whole world went black.

-----------------------------------------------------------

Olivia had already tried to call Y/N twice but it kept going straight to voicemail. The last known location had been their apartment so at least she had the sense to head straight home. The guilt in Olivia’s stomach was insurmountable. Watching her daughter explain that she never felt like she lived up to her standards. Olivia had promised herself when she had Y/N she would never end up like her mother. Yet there she was shaming her child for one mistake. Y/N was more than just a good kid, she was excellent. She was smart, beautiful, humorous, kind, and so much more. She was everything Olivia could have ever hoped for. Knowing that her daughter thought she wasn’t proud was the worst pain she could have.

After the third call Olivia finally decided to leave a voicemail, “Y/N I know you are mad but I need you to know something. I am proud of you and will always be proud of you. You are the best daughter and the most amazing human. I was rough on you early. Please let’s talk through this. I’ll be home soon with your favorite Chinese. Just don’t do anything stupid? I love you.”

When she hung up the phone she placed her head in her hands and let out a large sigh. Fin placed a reassuring hand on her back, “Liv, it is going to be okay. She is just being a teenager.”

“No Fin, you should have seen her. It was like I was physically taking her heart out and ripping it in front of her. I should have never said those things. I didn’t mean any of them… I was just upset.”

“She knows, they always know.”

Olivia merely shook her head and began to gather her things to head home. She walked out of the precinct without a goodbye and headed down the street to Y/N’s favorite Chinese place. They knew what she was going to order as soon as she walked in the door asking where Y/N was. Liv pushed off their question and scrolled through her phone as she waited for the food. Y/N’s phone was still off giving Olivia an eerie feeling as she finished the walk to the apartment. 

Once inside she noticed Y/N’s bag on the floor and her keys on the counter. There was a sudden rush of cold air that made her notice the window that was open to the fire escape. She shut it quickly and then moved to Y/N’s room. The door was still open with everything the way she had left it that morning. Once her calls were unanswered Olivia opened the window again crawling onto the fire escape. Sometimes Y/N would go to the roof to watch the sun slowly crawl behind the buildings.When she reached the top however she was met with an unsettling emptiness. 

Olivia reached for her phone to call the only person who was able to calm her anxiety lately, “Amaro, Y/N isn’t here. I can’t find her. What if something happened to her?”

“She probably just went to a friend’s house to get away,” Amaro replied stirring the contents of his drink, “She will be back in the morning just to relax. Sleep off the anger and come back with a clear head tomorrow.”

Liv pondered this suggestion over and over deciding what she should do. When the silence became too long Amaro interjected again, “Liv, I’m serious. You two had the biggest blow out that I have seen in awhile. Give her time to be mad at you and think. If you smother her she might only push further away from you.” She thanked her partner for the advice and then shoved her phone back in her pocket taking a sweep of the roof once again. Finally she slowly made her way back to the apartment shutting the window with a slam before locking it. Olivia wandered over to the kitchen moving the cereal that covered the top of the fridge to get to her secret cupboard. From the opening she pulled a large bottle of her favorite red wine. She popped the cork and decided to forgo a cup taking a long swig directly from the green glass. A large sigh escaped her lips as she plopped down on the couch going over the events of the day in her head.

As the contents of the bottle slowly drained till there was nothing else Olivia realized her fears were all coming true. She was becoming her mother. A woman she never once wanted to be. Three empty bottles later she finally curled under Y/N’s sheets crying into her pillow until she finally was able to fall asleep.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The next morning when Y/N did not return and her phone was still shut down all bets were off. Olivia was furious but more importantly she was terrified. Something was horribly wrong. Her morning was spent talking to Y/N’s two best friends and searching their houses for her. When that search was unsuccessful Olivia went to the school hoping Y/N had gone there. However, she had been absent all day and there hadn’t even been a call to excuse her from the day. 

When the morning bled into the afternoon Olivia was running around the city to all of Y/N’s usual hangout spots. The search of the library told her that Y/N hadn’t been there in over a week. The local bakery hadn’t seen her in three days. The coffee shop where Y/N always bought Olivia’s coffee when she came to see her at work had seen her two mornings ago but nothing since then. Even the old lady that had Y/N over twice a week to help her with errands and chores around the house hadn’t seen her. 

It was dark by the time that Olivia fell into her desk chair at the precinct. With her head in her hands she let the tears fall. A whole day was gone and there was still no sign of her daughter. If she had been kidnapped they were running out of time and losing it quickly. The longer she was out there the longer the person had to get away with whatever they wanted.

The squad huddled around in Cragen’s office looking at Olivia curled over her desk. Rollins was the first one to speak, “I bet you Lewis has something to do with this.”

“And what makes you think that?” Amaro asked, “There are plenty of people who could have a vendetta against Liv.”

“It’s just a feeling.”

“Yeah well have you ever considered the idea that maybe Y/N just ran away,” Amaro retorted.

Fin, Cragen, and Amanda all turned towards Amaro, shocked. Cragen was the first one to speak, “I know you haven’t been here long Amaro but this isn’t Y/N. Something is horribly wrong and we are going to figure out what is going on. Fin and Amanda go check out Lewis’ usual hiding spots. I’ll take Liv through her apartment once again to see if we missed anything.”

“And me cap?”

“Amaro… you stay here and set up a tip line,” Cragen responded curtly and then they all disappeared to find where Y/N had disappeared to.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Y/N woke with a jolt as she felt cold water splash her face. She was met with Lewis staring only a couple inches away from her face. He grinned and grabbed Y/N’s chin as she tried to look away, “Well well there. Looks like someone is finally awake. Feeling thirsty?”

Y/N nodded her head yes waiting to scream as he curled his fingers around the edge of the duct tape. As he was about to pull it away he jammed a gun against Y/N’s throat, “Make any noise and I will shove this gun straight down your throat.”

Finally when he pulled the tape away Y/N spit right in his face, “Just shoot me already if you are going to threaten me with it.”

“And miss out on all of our fun Mini Benson. I think not. There is plenty that I want to do to you before then.”

Y/N began to panic as Lewis lit another cigarette. She remembered the way the others had burned against her chest and sides. She had lost count after twenty perfect circle burns and after the second pistol whip to the face she had passed out a second time, She couldn’t go through all of that again.

“My mom knows I am missing and she will be out looking for me. Just let me go and she will never have to know that you did it. Please,” YN begged.

“What is she going to think about that bruise on your face? Or the marks on your skin? I can’t let you go… plus I know that you both fought before you came home. I bet you that she thinks you just ran away and are leaving her,” Lewis chuckled.

“How.. how did you know that we fought?

“This lovely voicemail your mother left you,” Lewis said, placing your phone against your ear.

Tears began to run down Y/N’s face as she heard the apology her mother had sent her. Damnit! Why did I have to fight with her? We could have avoided all of this. Is the mantra that ran through her head as Lewis slammed the phone against her head and threw it at the wall.

“She isn’t coming for you,” Lewis snickered.

“Please… just let me go. I will do anything.”

Lewis pulled his gun and placed it against Y/N’s scalp, “You are still bargaining with me? Really. We are way past that baby.”

“I am the daughter of an NYPD detective. A decorated well known detective. My mother, her partner, her squad, the entire department will hunt you down. You think that you’ve put people through hell. It will rain back down on you.”

“You know what… let it rain,” Lewis said and then hit Y/N once again making her world go black for a third time. 

[tendous-socks]

TOKYO REVENGERS HEADCANONS OF ME BEING NON BINARY / REACTING TO SOMEONE BEING NON BINARY

tw: ⚠️⚠️kisaki⚠️⚠️ and manga spoilers, mentions of death, transphobia,

would misgender and dead-name me

1.kisaki.

must i need an explanation?😐

2. shion

“ what’re you gonna do about it?? HUH?? WHAT’RE YOU GONNA DO ABOUT IT ???”

actively looks for a fight

… if y’all are in a relationship he’d still call you his “girl” but beats people up for doing so….

3. mucho

i get the vibes that he’s traditional

would silently stare in judgment

4. mochi

he just doesn’t care clslfkxkslk

thinks it’s weird

“ nor/mal”

7. rindou..

“you either have a pen or a vag. “

8.ran

“interesting”

*continues dead naming me*

9. KOKO

he would be nicer about it when he’s in toman due to inui… but once they’re separated- an ABSOLUTE MEANCE

… reluctantly apart of the protection squad with inui ( enjoys beating people up tho)

10. bontent mikey

… he’s just so tired and doesn’t really care ) that is if you’re not close with him… but then again how close can you really get?)

11. ) PAH CHIN

AND ONLY BECAUSE HE WAS IGNORANT AND HIS FATHER DIDN BELIEVE IN THAT STUFF AND HE DIDNT KNOW BUT THEN ( if y’all are close ) HE’D FEEL BAD AND AFTER YOU EXPLAINED IT TO HIM HE TOLD PEH CHIN TOO AND WERE SURPRISINGLY SUPPORTIVE

but if y’all ain’t close he would slowly get the hint… this is canon.

because i said so-

11. sanzu…

he’s quietly judging you

EDIT

SOMEONE SAID SANZU WOULD USE ANY PRONOUNS AND I REALLY LIKE THAT HC-

SO SANZU WOULD PROBABLY JUST ‘ SILENTLY JUDGE YOU’ SO OTHERS DONT CATCH ON MHMHM

12. akashi

traditional- plus it was a different era for him growing up so…

(would glare at someone if he really did see you getting emotionally distressed)

13. smiley

“ that’s one of the most stupidest shit ive ever fucking heard 😁”

.🙁

“ you either have tits or a dick “

.☹️

but would beat people up if you get SUPER upset ( call it his protect instincts with angry, but would send people to the hospital)

14. taiju

“ i wanna church girl who goes to church and reads her bible “

would spit at me

- WHO WOULD BEAT SOMEONE UP FOR DEAD-NAMING / MISGENDERING

1. PAH CHIN AND PEH YAN

THEYRE ABSOLUTE MENACES TO SOCIETY IF SOMEONE CALLS YOU A GIRL / BOY

head canon : during tenjiku you were there and had to adjust your transtape cause it was coming lose 🙄

which is literally the most annoying thing in the world-

and shion saw you.

he came up and was like “ HUH WHAT’VE WE GOT HERE?? A GIRL PRETENDING TO BE A G-“

couldn’t even finish his sentence with how fast peh chin clocked his ass 🤭

( peh yan supremacy)

2. my main man takemichy

no explanation needed ( maybe deadnamed you only once cause he didn’t know)

3. inui cause i said so

5. BAJI BAJI

BAJI WOULD ALMOST KILL A DUDE FOR CALLING YOU YOUR DEAD NAME

i KNOW mama baji raised him right ✋🙄

almost clocked chifuyu when you told him about your first encounter kcksldofospdoco

almost clocked your mom when she said “you got it girlfriend”

she was confused when she saw you desperately trying to prevent the next criminal minds episode

best listener for body dystrophia fight me 🙉❤️

6. senju

*comes out*

“..oh okay! anyways as i was saying [preferred name] “

would need some gentle reminders only once or twice cause i will say it does take a bit of time for people to get used to it and there are always a few slip ups

tells akashi about your pronouns ( ONLY WITH YOUR CONSENT OFC)

( promises to try and be more girly if he calls you by them and your preferred name)

she wants you to go into more details about what you’re feeling cause she’s genuinely very interested about everything and she wants to know more about you.

7. emma 😻 vv supportive 🙌🙌

*sicks mikey and draken out on anyone who hurts your feelings

“you know [blah blah blah] from history?”

“of course yeah “

“yeah he ended up calling me slur during class- what’re you doing?”

*emma pulling out her phone

“hm? oh nothing don’t worry about it”

gave more insight about it to draken and mikey

8. HINA

YALL SAW HOW SHE SLAPPED MIKEY-

THIS GIRL WOULD D R A G A BITCH BY THEIR HAIR IF SHE SAW THEM BULLYING YOU

the one of correct takemichy

9. yuzuha

hina but 10x worse

trips transphobes for shit and giggles 🤪🤞

i like to think that the girls (all 4) would just all stare down a girl who was shit talking you and just pick her apart mercilessly ( a little ooc but this is my head canons so they can be whatever i say they are)

ones idk about

1. mikey

he knows that you can handle yourself so he lets you correct people.

or

sometimes he’ll jump in and correct them instead for one of two reasons.

1. he felt like it

2. they kept calling you your dead name and misgendering you EVEN THOUGH you already corrected them

but if the person ACTIVELY does that and says some… not so fruity things. he’ll send em to the hospital and end up on life support 😌☝️

like dom tertto, he cares about his family. and toman is his family, and you’re in toman ( not THAT kind of y/n way 🙄 )

“ BE WHO YOU AREE🌈🌈🌈🌈🤪🤞🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈”

1. draken

… listen… idk why, but i just don’t SEE him beating people up for misgendering me… well okay i kinda see it,

but he’d be like, “ i don’t understand what you’re going through, but i support you and if you want to talk about it i’m here”

wants to try and understand so like i said before, he lets you rant about what you’re feeling

would let you handle your own battles cause your strong enough to

a true king 😎🙌

does in fact throw punches when it gets REALLY BAD

2. angry

… idk h o w empathic he is and how mad he’d have to be on your behalf when people actively kept misgendering you to become the blue ogre.

but he’d just start crying at the confrontation.. 😐

my hero ig 🤥

3. izana

“ that’s fucking stupid”

*beats up middle aged woman who said for you to “ have a good day ma’am”

but if y’all close he’ll only say it’s stupid once when he sees you genuinely upset and ignoring him

“ be who you are.. 🌈”

4. kaku

same boat as izana, A LOT less judgmental

5. mitsuya

won’t hesitate to send a bitch flying

actively corrects people

( teaches luna and mana about your pronouns for the next time you come over 🕺🏻)

TAKES YOU SHOPPING FOR CLOTHES

6. haitani brothers

*actively bullies you

*bullies kid into the grave for looking at your chest area

7. …hakkai

he accidentally slipped up once🤒

WHEN I SAY THIS MANS FACE WENT PALE- HE DIDNT TALK TO YOU FOR A W E E K MINIUM CAUSE HE FELT SO BAD

YOU KEPT TELLING HIM THAT ITS FINE-

BUT HE FELT AWFUL

( has nightmares about it)

8. chifuyu would only do it in his mohawk era cause he wanted to seem metal and impress da boys 🥶🥶☝️☝️

pulled you aside at the end of the day to apologize

( like i said before, baji almost clocked him when you told him about your first encounter )

who am i kidding they’re all in gangs, they’d probably kill someone if they hurt you cospwpfoslief

——————

IF YALL GOT ANYMORE IDEAS LMK CAUSE IM INVESTED IN YHIS AND WANNA HEAR WHAT YALL THINK