#and my laptop is more than 10 years old so like. no.

[itstimeforstarwars]

Desperately want to play jedi survivor but unfortunately I am enough of a boring adult that I'm not willing to buy a whole new system to play one fucking game.

[gotchibam]

Does anyone here draw in both desktop & mobile? I'm planning to get a galaxy tab at some point and since I don't really have any experience drawing on a (mobile) tablet, I'm curious abt how it feels to draw on one vs. drawing on pc w/ a graphic tablet 🤔

[bosspigeon]

man i wish i could draw comics i had such a good idea for a rly good character backstory one for Moss

[eve-is-a-terf]

desktop part is untrue 👹 not to be that gen z sorry

this can't be true can it

[catmask]

can i be so honest for a second. with the initial disclaimer of 'undertale is also just a really good game', i cant take anyone seriously who asks why undertale got more popular than like, any triple A game or game that requires a console/beefy computer. undertale was 10$ and could be played easily on my 6 year old apple laptop that used to emit sparks. it was accessible to the most powerful audiences: broke people and teenagers

[utvarpcity]

went to the apple store to get two old phones recycled…… left longing for an ipad with apple pencil. sigh

[leighsartworks216]

Nyctophobia

Sylus x gn!Reader

I still have to sleep with some sort of light on at night and I was like well what would Sylus think about this. And now here we are

Warnings: hurt/comfort, crying, kissing, nyctophobia (fear of the dark), embarrassment, fear, pet names, swearing, implied sexual content, established relationship

Word Count: 2,153

Main Masterlist

Love and Deepspace Masterlist

AO3

Tag List Form

You feel so fucking stupid. Not because you did something wrong or made a fool of yourself (yet), but because this dumb problem you had was so childish. Even a 10-year-old is braver than you, a literal fucking Hunter!

You pout at the nightlight on your laptop. Sylus’s black card sat on your coffee table, just waiting to be used. And yet, the thought of using a card with access to millions of dollars (perhaps billions), just to buy a nightlight, halted you in your tracks, He hadn’t even said much about anything else you’ve bought before, and what he did say usually encouraged you to buy more expensive, lavish things. Surely, he wouldn’t flinch at this at all.

But that stupid, unrelenting voice in your head made buying the light impossible.

Which sucked.

It really, really sucked.

‘Cuz every time you stay in the N109 Zone in Sylus’s manor-slash-base, your room is so dark. Being in the lawless area doesn’t help, either. All the violence and danger you’d seen walking in the streets at night painted visions of stalkers in the corner, murderers with knives under your bed, and worse, just waiting for you to close your eyes and sleep.

But you don’t want to impose on the nice atmosphere Sylus has cultivated in his home. So you sleep with the light off, clinging to your blankets and telling yourself over and over again that nobody else is in the room.

Your phone buzzing interrupts your pity party. You shut your laptop and place it on the table next to the card. It buzzes again as you pick it up.

What’s wrong, sweetie?

I’ve only seen you make that face when a plushie falls out of the claw

You look up at your window. Sure enough, Mephisto’s red eyes greet you.

Stop spying on me >:(

Fine

The mechanical crow disappears from sight. You can just barely hear his caws as he flies off back to the N109 Zone.

But my question still stands

It’s nothing. Don’t worry about it

Sweetie, if someone says not to worry about something, people are going to worry about it

Damn him for giving you a chance to tell the truth. And damn your brain for reminding you that if you tell him the truth, he’d probably laugh at you. What does he have to worry about when he sleeps anyway? He’s already a light sleeper, but he also sleeps during the day, when creeps skitter from shadow to shadow. He wouldn’t understand.

Like I said, it’s nothing

Nothing happens for a few moments. The little dots to signify he’s typing don’t even show up. You can’t help wondering what he’s doing. What he’s thinking.

Maybe he’s getting ready to start the night, getting into his car so Luke and Kieran can drive him around to his many business dealings. Or maybe he’s picking out a vinyl from his shelf, taking it from the paper casing with a delicacy only shared with you, and setting it up on his phonograph. Or maybe he’s mimicking you: sitting on the couch, staring at the phone, wondering what to say next.

The dots appear, finally.

Come to the N109 Zone, kitten

Let me cheer you up

If Mephisto was still lurking around, he’d have seen just how fast you packed your things and hopped onto your bike.

Yes, the N109 Zone is dark and scary and extremely dangerous at the best of times. Yes, you’d be forced to sleep in the dark once again. Yes, your mind would play tricks on you and you’d probably stay up all night anyway.

But Sylus is there. And you haven’t seen him for almost a week. Who could blame you for jumping at the opportunity to spend time with him now?

-

Sylus greets you at the door with an amused smirk. “You got here fast.”

You playfully glare at him, smacking his chest as you pass by. “There wasn’t any traffic,” you tease.

The manor is as dark as usual. If it’s not black, it’s dark red. If it’s not dark red, it’s the occasional white furniture or golden accent.

Sylus trails behind you as you beeline it straight to your room to drop off your stuff. He leans in the doorway as you toss your bag onto the plush bed. “You seem to be in a better mood now,” he hums.

“I always feel better when I get to see you.” You smile up at him. It’s a soft remark. Genuine. Not the usual joking, back-and-forth banter you’re usually all too happy to supply during your visits.

His expression melts into something just as tender. Just as honest. He casually pushes himself off the doorframe and crosses the few steps it takes to get to you. His hands cradle you like one of his precious antiques, tilting your face up while he cranes his neck until the world has shrunk to just this moment.

He grins. His eyes keep glancing down at your mouth. You grab onto his waist. Your fingers curl into his soft red sweater, desperate to keep him this close. His lips brush against yours, stealing the air from your lungs.

“Then let me make it worth your while.”

-

It’s still dark when you wake up. The navy blue behind the curtain carries no hint of light, reassuring your sleep-addled brain that there is still plenty of time before day.

You roll over, silk sheets caressing your bare form, fully intending to go right back to sleep. Cold air slips underneath the blanket. You shiver and pull it tighter around you. Without thinking, you reach out toward the other side of the bed. It’s too large for just one person. The bed is cold beneath your fingers, even as you reach out farther.

You blink open your eyes, blearily staring into the darkness, searching for some answer you can quite grasp yet.

What are you reaching for…?

You turn your face into your pillow, determined to ignore that strange feeling in your gut and enjoy the last hours of the night. The rich scent of bourbon and vanilla catch on the edge of your senses. It smells just like Sylus…

You open your eyes again. Where’s Sylus?

Your fingertips brush the edge of the bed as you reach out. A discordant chord of terror strikes in your heart as you quickly pull your hand back. Thoughts of something reaching out to grab you flood your mind. Your heart races, chasing off the last ounces of sleepiness from your body.

You pull the blanket even tighter around you, curling it under your feet and tucking it into your sides until you’re in a cocoon of safety. No matter how hard you strain your eyes, you can’t see anything. But in your mind, everything can see you.

You curl up into a pitiful ball.

You could get up, but you can’t. What if something grabs your ankles?

You could grab your phone, but you can’t. What if something is waiting in ambush and your phone is the bait?

You could do a thousand things to get out of this darkness. But you can’t, for a million reasons.

The door knob slowly turns. The only indication the door has opened at all is the sound of the lower edge brushing against the carpeted floor. No light comes in from the hall. It’s all pitch black. The door clicks shut.

You hold your breath.

Footsteps. Large, heavy footsteps. They don’t stomp. You’re not sure if it would be better if they did. They creep around the side of the bed.

You don’t move.

Weight shifts the mattress. Slowly. Deliberately.

Your heartbeat pounds in your ears. You strain to hear anything else.

Something slides over your blankets.

You squeeze your eyes shut so tight you see spots. You bite your lip to avoid making sound.

The something - a hand, you think - wraps around your waist.

You flinch.

Oh god, oh god, oh god. They’re gonna know you’re awake. They’re gonna cover your mouth or stab you or put a pillow over your face or-

“Kitten?”

Your body shudders as you finally let yourself breathe. You grab your pillow as you quickly sit up and swing it at the face of your lover.

“I thought you were gonna fucking kill me?!”

Sylus laughs, chucking the pillow back onto your side of the bed. You can’t see him in the dark, but your body can’t stop taking in every ounce of him that it can. His smell - the bourbon and vanilla tinged with a natural musk. His voice - that rich, lively sound of his laugh and the breaths he takes. His touch - his hand, trailing patterns over the blanket at your hip.

You crawl toward him, clinging to his chest like a koala. He’s still shirtless from your escapades. His hand slides to your back, pulling you in tighter to him. You can feel the rumble of his voice in his chest. You press your ear against him to hear more.

“Why would you think that?” he asks once he’s gathered himself.

You don’t answer. You squeeze him tighter.

“Sweetie?” The amusement is replaced with concern. His other arm wraps around you. The muscles tense with the slightest effort. He says your name.

Relief settles heavy in your bones. Tears prick at your eyes, while you remain utterly powerless to stop them. “It’s too dark,” you whimper. It’s all you can think to say.

His arms tighten around you as he rolls onto his back, pulling you on top of him like you weigh nothing. He begins playing with your hair. “Does it scare you?” he asks softly.

You nod. You pull one of your hands out from around him to wipe the tears off your face and his chest.

God, you feel so fucking pathetic.

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

You don’t answer. His chest rises and falls with you on it, moving with his sigh. He pulls your hand away from your face and replaces it around him. You want to fight it. Complain about how gross it is to get all your tears on him. But he shushes you gently and you can’t find the strength to try.

“Do you want to go downstairs?”

You nod again.

The world shifts as he sits up with you. He pries you off of him so he can stand up, but he doesn’t go far. He grabs his sweater off the ground and helps you put it on. Then he goes through your dresser for some clean underwear. He helps you stand and slides them on. You don’t open your eyes. You don’t want to see the darkness. So you hold onto his shoulders. You put all your trust into him, and he refuses to betray it.

He lifts you into his arms like you’re a damn princess. Usually, he’d throw you over his shoulder, but not this time. This time he’s careful, treating you with the utmost care as he carries you down the stairs and to the living room. With a wave of his fingers, the lights turn on, black and red left in its wake.

“It’s not dark anymore,” he promises as he sits down. You keep your face safely tucked into his neck. He rests his cheek on your head. His fingers go back to your hair. His other hand rubs patterns against your bare thigh.

After a while, your terror finally dissipates completely. You can see the light shining through your closed eyelids. Feel its subtle warmth against your skin. When you find the strength to open your eyes, the warm, comfortable ambiance of Sylus’s home greets you once more.

You use the sleeve of his sweater to wipe at your face. “I’m sorry.” Your voice cracks. You cringe with embarrassment. “It’s stupid, I know.”

He hums noncommittally. “Is this what you were telling me not to worry about?” he asks instead.

You nod. “I was looking at… at nightlights,” you admit in a murmur.

“What kind?”

“Hm?” You pull back to look up at him. He lets you, meeting your gaze with a soft seriousness. “What d’you mean?”

He smirks slightly, eyebrow quirking upward. “I mean, what kind of nightlight would you like, sweetie? Fairy lights, a wall light, one of those animal-shaped ones that glows…”

You frown and look away. “You’re teasing me, aren’t you?”

“I’m asking,” he cups your cheek and guides your face to look at him, “so I can buy you one. Now, will you tell me, or do I have to buy every single nightlight on the market?”

You laugh despite yourself. “I have it pulled up on my laptop…”

He grins. “Good.” He pulls you into a chaste kiss. “Don’t hesitate to buy it next time. Or to tell me what’s wrong. If there’s one thing I can’t stand, it’s a sad kitten.”

---

Tag List:

@the-golden-jhope @huen1ngk41 @armycaratlover @sylusfluffymeow @cheesemachine44

[kiame-sama]

Humans Are Extinct- (Yandere!TWST x Fem!Reader) Monster AU pt 4

(Since my computer died, I will use some of the other monster AU art I haven't used in a chapter yet instead. Hopefully I can rustle up another computer soon or get Ol' Peepaw Sammy (my 10+ year old laptop) to run my drawing software without having a heart-attack.)

Warnings: collaring, aggressive kindness, yanderes are rampant in this story, invasion of privacy, romantic yanderes, platonic yanderes, monster AU, some history for the monster AU, mention of Humans being eaten, Teachers and Crowley are going to have a ROUGH time, more characters being introduced, reader insert, fem reader, Driders, Crows, Minotaurs, Shadow-men, Selkies, Dragons, Fae, Bats, Harpies, Unicorns, Nemean Lions, Grim is less boisterous/confident in this AU given his rough life but he is still the sassy and clueless kitty-creature we all love, reader is called several affectionate pet names by platonic yanderes (Pup/Cub/Chick)

~~~~~~~~

"So... What happened here?"

You cuddled your new monster friend close to you as you looked upon the building you had been carried to by Rook. He had been swift to return you and the cat-monster you befriended to the building the supposed teachers had been leading you towards. Even as you sat on the large Spider's back and stared up at the building, you could see the apparent change that had overcome it.

It mostly looked the same as it had when you had run away from it, but there were several improvements and adjustments that had been made in the short time you were away. Where the windows had been boarded up, they were now all clean and fixed. Where the siding of the building had been in obvious disrepair and even falling off in some places, it now looked like it had received a needed bit of care and reconstruction.

"I can answer that!"

You let out a yelp at the sudden interjection, unconsciously reaching out to Rook's torso and clinging to the Spider man in fear. The way you yelped made your sudden visitor giggle in amusement at your behavior. Hanging from what appeared to be a dead tree branch above you was that same pink and black haired guy that had been in the Dragon's nest with you. He had an impish smile as he regarded you, that smile slipping ever so slightly as his eyes flicked over you and how tightly you held to Rook.

Rook was actually both amused and felt endeared by the fact that you grabbed onto him in a bid for protection from the Drider. It was so very sweet to him to see he had earned some goodwill and trust from you by rescuing you from the Undying Ursus Minor. Even when you relaxed upon realizing who was speaking, you very clearly held tightly to your soft companion, Grim.

"Oh? Did you make a friend out in the forest?"

The Bat Fae dropped from the branch, righting himself before he even hit the ground as he approached your little group. He took a long moment to look at Grim before he gained a kind of impish smile.

"I'll have to inform Malleus about your new charge. We wouldn't want this little one getting burned to a crisp by Malleus. Besides, I know how protective and adoring Children of Man can be when it comes to their cherished companions. The last human I met died for their companions."

Grim seemed unsettled by the Bat's presence and you could feel the way his torn wings seemed to pull closer to his body. Maybe it was the fact that the Bat had wings that were a lot like Grim's, and maybe it was the fact that this newcomer had been so keen to startle you. Regardless, you felt a strong need to protect your new friend as he was the only one who didn't seem to have some kind of twisted agenda planned for you.

"Anyway, Malleus and the other Housewardens showed up after you ran away- not a wise move, might I add- so several of them decided you should be somewhere safer than an old run-down building. Malleus did most of the fixing, but it seemed even Schoenheit was keen to make several additions to your accommodations. They're still mostly here, Malleus went back to his nest to give you some space."

You carefully slid off of the back of the large Spider man, noticing the unusual softness of his fur along the back of his Spider body. There was a kind of intimidation you felt now that you were back on level ground, as the height of Rook's Spider back did make you feel somewhat safer. Now you were on level ground and felt very small next to the blond who towered over you.

In some ways, you wanted to question the unusual Bat, but it quickly became clear you were not going to get that chance as the more adult-appearing men approached. The Crow was in the lead and was flanked by four others that seemed to be older than the monster men you had encountered en masse when you first entered this twisted nightmare land. Two of the men you recognized as the two who came with the Crow to retrieve you from the odd Dragon that had claimed you. The other two were unfamiliar to you, but no less beastly than the first.

One of them seemed to be an older man somewhere in his fifties with gray hair and clear creases along his brow and mouth. Attached where his lower half should have been was the body of some kind of big cat, a pair of oddly large wings sprouted along the shoulders of the cat body and the lower back of the man. He almost seemed to walk with a slight limp as his back leg had clearly suffered some kind of damage in the past.

The second newcomer was a man that seemed to be wreathed in shadows. All you could really make out from the darkness was the skeletal white mask adorning his face, lining up on the same place his own skull would be. His bright purple eyes pierced through the darkness and gleamed like gemstones beneath the brim of his top hat. He seemed younger than the others, but you found it difficult to accurately gauge his age due to the shadows that wrapped around him.

"Now that you're done racing off with no regard to your own health, foolish little chick, it seems I must have a lengthy conversation with you regarding the dangers that are ever present to someone as magically lacking as you."

~~~~~~~~

Several Housewardens and even a few Vice-Housewardens gathered nearby the Ramshackle building and watched the interaction curiously. It was true many had all pitched in to make the decrepit building a bit more liveable for you, but it was nowhere near the level of quality they believed an extinct species should have. They did what they could in the short amount of time they had, busying themselves with the project instead of charging headlong into the forest like many wanted to.

Rook and Lilia had excused themselves from the stern lecture the Crow was giving, opting instead to retreat to the nearby group. Many of those present took interest in Rook, as they could detect the scent he now carried due to carrying the fragile Human back to the safety of campus. A few even tried to take a subtle sniff of the Drider in an attempt to catch more of that uniquely Human smell.

"Roi du Poison, your faithful Huntsman has returned victorious with the little Human completely safe and sound!"

Rook was quick to take his place next to the peacock Harpy, practically beaming from the joy of another successful hunt. For all the beautiful muses Rook had claimed, he was closest with his muse Vil Schoenheit as the peacock Harpy had been one of the primary driving forces in Rook's life. From learning to care for his own appearance to taking care of Vil's pin feathers, he had few he could thank half as much as Vil.

Vil gave the slightest of smiles at having his second in command back by his side, his feathers ever so slightly rousing and fluffing out to show the Harpy was pleased. For all the eccentric behavior his Vice-Housewarden showed, Rook was nigh irreplaceable to Vil. Just knowing Rook had been the one to rescue the little Human was also another source of pride for Vil as it was another source of envy from the others.

"At least Rook can be trusted to bring the Human back promptly. I doubt the same would have been said of you, Leona."

The Nemian Lion was standing away from the group, but the clear way his ears angled back showed he was annoyed. Leona knew he wasn't trusted around the Human without supervision. He and anyone else from Sunset Savana would have to prove themselves 'domestic' to even be considered.

It was Sunset Savana that continued to eat Humans the longest and thus had been branded by the other Kingdoms and Queendoms as barbaric monsters. Leona didn't often pay attention in class- especially boring ass History- but even he knew the way Humans had been adored by so many others. Riddle went as far as not letting Leona out of his sight the second they arrived at the rundown excuse of a dorm. He knew the others wouldn't trust him around that fragile Human even with supervision.

"Piss off, Birdy."

Rook was not thrown by Vil's casual sniping towards Leona, the two proud Housewardens always seeming to be at odds. Instead, the Drider turned to the red-haired Unicorn with a pleasant smile.

"Roi du Règles, you will be pleased to know mon Trickster is Mademoiselle Trickster. You mentioned earlier you could sense her purity, non? That would make her a Human Maiden; the ideal boon companion for a Unicorn such as yourself!"

"Is she? Then it seems I must endeavor to even greater heights to protect her. No doubt the common rabble here will be eager to get at the only Human and only female on campus."

It was then a certain displeased yell split the air, originating from the Human in question. The shout unsettled the various students present and even managed to make Riddle almost rear from the sudden interjection.

"What the hell is wrong with you?!"

~~~~~~~~

You stared incredulously at Crowley, your hands resting over the collar that now sat securely on your neck. Despite how you pulled and groped at the material, you couldn't find a way to unlock it and free yourself from the new and rather dehumanizing feeling of being collared. Even Grim got himself a matching Collar, though his looked more like a pristine bow. Both his collar and your collar had a little device hanging where the tags would be on a dog's collar.

"You've made it more than abundantly clear that you will wander away to areas that can be dangerous to your health if you are allowed to freely roam. I can't have you ending your life prematurely simply because you didn't have the sense to stay away from something dangerous. That collar of yours will make it much easier to dissuade you from going places you shouldn't."

Grim was still trying to wriggle out of his collar while you glared angrily at the overgrown Crow who put it there. You eventually had to stop Grim as the little cat-creature was beginning to thrash and could hurt himself if he wasn't careful. Luckily, the little beast soothed with your touch and stared up at you through his mismatched and scarred eyes. Even though you wanted to lay into Crowley for daring to put a collar on the two of you like you were some kind of pet, the man who had introduced himself as Divus Crewel spoke up.

"I know you don't like the collar, but try to think of it from our perspective, sweet pup. You aren't a normal sight here or anywhere in our world. If certain ne're-do-wells caught wind of a Human living on our campus, they may try to poach you if given the chance. We don't want to give them the chance."

You frowned angrily at the men but also somewhat understood where they were coming from on the matter. Though you really couldn't grasp the concept of Humans being extinct- given the fact you came from a world where Humans were the only truly sentient species- you did somewhat understand where they were coming from. Classifying an animal as endangered only made an increase in the demand for pieces of said animal. They were certain Humans were extinct, so you were more than just a prized commodity to collectors and hunters alike.

"How does the collar help against poaching? If someone wanted to get me with an arrow or a knife, a collar doesn't do anything to stop that."

"That is true in most cases, but your collar is enchanted. The collar keeps track of your location and will alert us as well as the Housewardens if anything does try to harm you. It can't stop a full attack, but it can deflect minor magic."

"Why did Grim get collared too?"

"Because, though I am loathe to let a beast of the forest stay with you, it is better you have some kind of magical protection with you. His skills are subpar compared to a Housewarden, but it is still more skill and magic than you have available to you. Best to keep track of the both of you."

Grim didn't fight his collar anymore, but he certainly didn't look happy as his little torn wings drooped and his ears angled downwards. He was clearly quite displeased but didn't seem too upset despite the fact he did not sign up for this kind of treatment. Once he resigned himself to the collar, he slightly perked up and raised his lopsided gaze to meet that of Crewel.

"Hey, Seal-guy, does this mean I have to go to classes with my Hench-Hooman like a student and stuff?"

"It would be ideal to have (Y/n) attend classes, if only to keep her around professors and prevent the loneliness from negatively impacting her health. Humans were known to be a social creature, after all, and with no other Humans around the other students would be the next best thing."

"... So does that mean I can actually be a fancy-pants student and become the greatest mage to ever live?"

"Whatever keeps you by (Y/n)'s side. Though it may behoove us to enlist the aid of other students as well... They will have to prove themselves first, of course."

Crowley nodded along to Crewel's words as if they were the most obvious thing and you vaguely got the impression that the Crow really didn't realize what he was agreeing to. Though he was the Headmage- which to you meant he was the head of the school- he seemed far less aware of the situation as a whole and leaned on the other professors for that information. Something about him made you wonder why he was so eager to keep you on school grounds. It made you think back to his comment about the last human he met and you wondered if that had anything to do with how keen he was to keep you yet seemed keen to let the others take point in explaining things to you.

It was during this thought that the older looking man spoke, his voice aged and almost fatherly in how he spoke to you.

"Naturally, you are still the only true expert on Humans, being one yourself, so we will have to ultimately trust your judgement. I am of a mind with Divus that we should not be allowing a forest beast unrestricted access to you, but you seem to trust this Grim. Should you need something, you have but to ask us one of us. I also feel Mr. Rosehearts, Mr. Hunt, Mr. Draconia, and perhaps even a number of others would be keen to aid you. Don't ever go to Savanaclaw for aid. Though it may have been several hundred years ago, many of those from Sunset Savana and those of specific beastman lineages were instrumental in the extinction of Humans. Better to be safe than sorry with your safety."

He had been introduced to you as Mozus Trein, the History professor. Though you were curious as to why he seemed so fond of you, you figured it had something to do with you being Human and his natural love and fascination with history. You had to admit, it was nice that he didn't talk to or about you like you were a pet or some kind of exotic toy- an exotic animal, maybe, but not a pet. Most of the professors seemed to be of a similar mind- minus the Crow- and that somewhat helped put you at ease with them.

"So, does that mean it will only be Grim and I in here? No one else?"

"Well, the regular ghosts or fore fairies may pay you a visit and check in on you. Would you like someone to spend the evening here as well? I understand this is a new place and some company may put you at ease. It is my understanding that Mr. Draconia has already made a secondary nest in this dorm for you to use at your leisure, no doubt the others added beds or various furniture as well."

"No, I kind of like the fact that it's just me and Grim, I was just wondering because all of them are here," you gestured to the group of Housewardens and Vice-Housewardens nearby, "so I didn't know if they were staying or not. It is getting super late at night..."

"They should be returning to their dorms soon, though Housewardens and Vice-Housewardens are not bound by the same curfew as the other students."

He glanced at the others before back at you, a serious look of concern painting his features.

"Are you certain you would rather be alone tonight? Some wayward fools may try to enter the dorm when we leave."

The genuine concern in his expression and tone made you seriously consider his words. It was true that you didn't really feel very safe with anyone other than your small companion Grim, but the wizend professor did have a point. His prompting paired with the fact that you had made many poor choices for yourself this night did more to sway you than expected. You looked at the several monsters waiting nearby and had to conceed that someone keeping an eye out was not a bad idea given the already rocky start to your time in such a world.

"... I think you might have a point, actually..."

"How about this; you choose from the Housewardens and Vice-Housewardens who helped fix up this old dorm for you. Clearly they have at least shown they care for your wellbeing enough to put in an effort to make it livable. I will say now- however- should you choose Leona, I will choose someone else for you. I would love to say all our students are safe, but that just isn't the case and we can't take chances with you."

"That seems fair... But how do I know which one Leona is?"

"Leona is the Nemean Lion- ah, but I forget, you don't have Nemean Lions where you're from, do you?"

You shook your head. You could recall that there were Greek myths of Heraclies slaying a golden lion known as the Nemean Lion, but nothing like the monster men you have met.

"I will point him out when you decide who you feel is safest to stay with you."

"Okay. Grim, want to help me choose?"

The stout creature smiled eagerly in response to your question, holding up his front legs for you to pick him up. He was not like a cat in the sense that he was thrilled when you held him, but he did seem to enjoy your warmth and the fact he didn't have to walk when you carried him. As you cuddled Grim, professor Trein began to lead you to the group.

It was easy to feel somewhat safe with the older man and you kept close to his side as you two approached the group of fellow students. They all looked curious at the fact that you and the professor had approached them first. Perhaps you were going to thank them or ask them for something else to help you settle in.

"Listen up, you lot. I would hope others have enough common sense to leave (Y/n) here alone, but we all know that isn't going to happen. Since you are the ones that actually showed up to ensure our only Human is safe, it is safe to assume you care what happens to (Y/n). We feel it would be best to have either a Housewarden or a Vice-housewarden remain here for the evening in the event someone tries their luck."

Professor Trein then glanced back at you, nodding his head towards the group in clear invitation to approach. As you drew close, you couldn't help but take note of how all eyes quickly fell on you. Some of the people there were familiar to you, and some were not.

Rook was among the familiar, same with the Harpy that stood next to him. The only one whose name you recognized was Rook's as he had been the only one to actually introduce himself to you.

"... Can I choose Rook? He's the only name I know..."

"I would happily accept, Mademoiselle Trickster, but there is one far fairer and better than I at all but hunting. I suggest you choose Roi du Poison, the beautiful Vil Schoenheit."

The Spider man made a sweeping arm motion to his side towards the Bird man, as if he were presenting the Bird man to you. The Bird in question seemed surprised by the sudden introduction but took it in stride and instead turned his purple eyes to you. As you locked eyes with him, something odd happened. His feathers seemed to quiver before the feathers atop his head raised, his tail feathers doing the same to create an almost dazzling display of iridescent colors. He was clearly a peacock Bird man, but what didn't make much sense to you was why he was showing off for you. You didn't think you were really worth showing those feathers to since you weren't a Bird like him.

"You are welcome to choose one as fair as me, little Human. I will ensure your safety to the furthest of my capabilities."

It almost seemed like the peacock were trying to make himself seem like the best choice, showing off colors and strength in an effort to have you choose him. If anything, you weren't the only one who was surprised at seeing such a display from the peacock. The others seemed almost shocked by this showing of feathers but someone was clearly far less than pleased upon seeing Vil posturing for you.

"Absolutely not! I refuse to allow anyone who does any kind of display dance for her to be permitted anywhere near her. I would have your head if you weren't my senior, Vil! Such a maiden should not be accosted by eager men who only see her as a breeding toy. Professor, I demand you override this choice and select me to guard this Human. I shall uphold every rule the Queen has set and I will not allow such tomfoolery to burden this Human."

Vil seemed angered by this as his feathers ruffled and stood on end, eyes glaring angrily at the offending Unicorn man. The wickedly sharp tallons on the ends of the Bird's fingers seemed to only be sharper when displayed with such clear disdain for the Unicorn. It seemed like a fight was on the verge of erupting before Grim's voice interrupted them.

"I don't like any of them! Maybe the Spider-Drider-guy, but this is my Hooman which means I should choose who protects us!"

"Are you-? What the hell is a 'Hooman'? She is a Human, not 'Hooman' and I don't appreciate your casual disrespect for her species-!"

It was during the Unicorn's rant that you interrupted, feeling angry that the man would dare talk to Grim like that. Sure, you found it odd that the cat creature called you Hooman, but you certainly didn't mind it either. Even above all of that, Grim was your friend and these men were not.

"And who said it was your place to correct him? I know what I am and I think it's cute he calls me Hooman. What I don't appreciate is how you think you can yell at him! He can call me Hooman if he wants, you are not afforded the same privilege! And I have a name. It's (Y/n) (L/n), so don't you dare ever call me anything else."

Your sudden snapping at the Unicorn clearly surprised and unsettled him as he took several steps back, almost seeming like he was about to rear from your yelling. Even though his blue eyes stared in absolute surprise, you felt no need to back down and if anything you wanted to chase off the delicate Unicorn for daring to raise his voice at Grim. A light chuckle met your ears and drew your ire away from the Unicorn and to another familiar grinning face. It was the pink and black haired Bat.

"Keeheehee, seems she doesn't like you very much Riddle. Or, it could be that Humans are traditionally a pack-bonding species and little Grim is now her pack. Clearly Riddle isn't your choice, so who actually will be?"

You frowned at this question and went back to looking at the group, Grim seemed to be doing the same as he purred and snuggled down into your arms. From those you now knew, you still figured either the Bat or Rook would be best. It was then someone else caught your eye bringing you to a halt as you stared at them.

He had sun kissed skin and dark mahogany hair. Even as he stood in the light of the moon, he almost seemed to have a golden glow that wrapped around his scowling figure. When he noticed you looking at him, his bright green eyes narrowed ever so slightly before looking away from you. His actions were as if he were trying to dissuade you from picking him despite the fact he was among the group. You vaguely recognized him from the many who you first saw when you came tumbling out of the coffin.

"Choose someone else, Mousey. They won't let you pick me, I might gobble you up."

"I'm not a-"

"Yes, you are. You are a little Mousey herbivore of the only sentient species Nemean Lions dared to feast upon."

"Nemean...? You're Leona?"

"I'm surprised you even care enough to know my name. Leona Kingscholar, second prince of Sunset Savana and Housewarden of Savanaclaw. Careful, Mousey, you aren't safe around me. I may not have tasted Human before, but I'm willing to break several laws to give it a try."

He almost seemed like he was trying to actually get you away from him, a look of vague sadness hiding behind his smouldering emerald eyes even as he glared at you. There was more to this tale than he was telling but you knew he wasn't going to give you the information you wanted. With another long look at the golden Lion, you turned you gaze back to the group as a whole.

"I guess... Since the Dragon- Malleus, if I'm remembering properly- isn't here, I'll pick the Bat."

"Aww, I'll be sure to let Malleus know you wanted to pick him. I'm sure he'll be pleased. I can keep an eye on you and make sure those other whippersnappers don't come sniffing around. Keeheehee, cute that you call me Bat, but I also have a name if you feel like using it. Lilia Vanrouge, at your esteemed service, (Y/n). Malleus is my primary ward, but he certainly wouldn't be too displeased if I kept an eye on his hoard as well."

You nodded, wondering just why the Dragon decided you were one of his but not willing to question Lilia as to the true motives just yet. It almost seemed like those present fixed Lilia with a jealous sneer as the Bat happily joined your side. Trein simply nodded, accepting your choice as it was not Leona- whom he planned to berate for threatening you- and was a fairly safe choice. Lilia was of the few who had encountered a Human before in his many centuries, so no doubt he would be safe around you.

"It is decided then. I shall see you in my class tomorrow, (Y/n). Do not hesitate to reach out to me should you need anything. Your other professors and I will be working on getting you a phone to communicate with us faster. For now, sleep well, little cub."

[dancinglikebutterflywings]

7:10 AM | Timestamp

Pairing: Dad!Jung Wooyoung x Mum!Reader Synopsis: Wooyoung's favourite girls surprise him for his birthday. Requested by: No one Warnings: I love writing girl!dad Wooyoung so much. Pregnancy. Word Count: 875

A/N: this ended up being longer than a timestamp so enjoy. This took longer to post because my laptop was playing up.

Wooyoung Masterlist | ATEEZ Masterlist | Taglist Sign-Up

"What's all this?" Y/N’s husband’s sleepy voice comes from behind her as she puts on the final touches of setting the table for breakfast. 

Turning around, she sees Wooyoung gazing at her with wide, curious eyes, their six-year-old daughter beaming with excitement in his arms. Y/N gives her daughter a playful frown. The little girl had been eager to wake her father for his birthday surprise but she can’t fault her for it. Hae-young had no idea about the plan until Y/N had woken her up this morning, asking if she wanted to help surprise Daddy. There was no way Y/N would have spilled the beans to Hae-young before today. The little girl definitely inherited Wooyoung's yapping tendencies, making her terrible at keeping secrets. If she knew about what Y/N was planning earlier, the surprise would have been ruined.  

"What do we say to Appa?" Y/N prompts Hae-young.  

"Happy Birthday, Appa!" she exclaims joyfully, throwing her arms up in excitement, nearly making Wooyoung lose his hold on her. 

Wooyoung's sleepy grin grows as he finally registers what's happening, his eyes moving from the beautifully decorated table with flowers, balloons, seaweed soup, a couple of gift bags, and a small homemade cake to the excited face of his daughter. "Did you do all this for me?" 

"Eomma did, but I helped!" she proudly declares. 

Y/N watches as Hae-young beams with pride. The sight of their daughter’s enthusiasm fills her with warmth, and she can’t help but smile back at them both. Wooyoung, still half-asleep but now fully engaged, his eyes sparkling with affection, praises his little girl for a job well done before pressing a kiss to her cheek and leaning forward to press a kiss on Y/N's check also. 

Hae-young's laughter rings through the room like music, and Y/N feels her heart swell at the sight of her family. 

"Come on, Appa! You have to open my gift first!" Hae-young tells him, wriggling her way out of her dad's hold before taking his hand, tugging him towards the table. 

As soon as Wooyoung settles into his seat, Hae-young climbs onto his lap, reaching across the table for the larger black gift bag filled with all the things she picked out for him. 

"What did you get for me?" he asks taking the bag, opening it and reaches inside. The first thing he pulls out a black toy stuffed cat, this one different to his Aniteez sitting in her room. This one has big, sparkling green eyes and a tiny pink bow around its neck. Wooyoung chuckles, holding it up for Hae-young to see. "A black cat? You know your Appa very well." 

Hae-young giggles, clearly delighted with her choice of stuffed animal. "There's more, Appa."  

"Is there?" he replies, reaching back into the bag and pulling out three smaller gifts. One is a new bottle of black nail polish that Hae-young insisted on getting after seeing Wooyoung's nails painted for the latest comeback. Another is a box featuring his favorite cologne, and the last looks like a jewellery box. He opens it to reveal a small, intricately designed keychain with a photo of her inside it. Wooyoung smiles recognizing the image. It was of Hae-young, beaming with joy, her hair tousled by the wind, standing on her grandparent’s front doorstep. 

"Wow, Hae-young, I love it so much, I’m going to put it on my keys before I leave for work, so I can show all your uncles!" he exclaims, his voice filled with genuine admiration. “they’re going to be so jealous!” 

“Do you think so?” she asks hopeful. 

“I know so,” he assures her. “Now, do you know what eomma got me?” 

She takes a moment to think about it but shakes her head, no.  

"Why don’t you go eat while I open eomma's gift, okay?" he suggests, shifting in his seat. She obediently moves to sit in the chair next to him.  

Y/N picks up the small black gift bag and hands it to him. "It’s not much, but I hope you like it," she says, her voice tinged with nervousness. He looks at her with a hint of concern, takes the bag, and opens it. As he pulls out a box larger than the one containing the keychain, his eyes widen in surprise. Looking at her, a mix of excitement and hope fills his gaze.  

"Is this for real?" he asks, glancing between the sonogram photo and the positive pregnancy test, then back at her. 

"Yes," Y/N replies, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. 

 In a burst of excitement, Wooyoung quickly stands from his chair, almost knocking it backwards, and wraps her in his arms, pressing his lips to hers. "I love you so much," he says in between kisses. "Best birthday ever," he adds when he pulls away enough to wipe her tears that had fallen, not realizing he has tears in his own eyes. 

"Appa? Eomma? Is something wrong?" they hear Hae-young ask, her innocent curiosity breaking through the moment. 

Wooyoung quickly wipes away the tears that had begun to form in his eyes, kneeling down to Hae-young's level. He glances at his wife before looking back at her. "Nothing’s wrong, sweetheart. Appa's just having the best birthday he's ever had." 

@staytiny2000 - @treehouse-mouse - @katzline - @alexxavicry - @jedi-dreea

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@jjoongstar - @arki-sha - @forever-atiny - @lixisoul99 - @do-you-remember-summer-127 -

@catzachvsvt - @ateez-atiny380 - @reayahnadeem24

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Too big to care

I'm on tour with my new, nationally bestselling novel The Bezzle! Catch me in BOSTON with Randall "XKCD" Munroe (Apr 11), then PROVIDENCE (Apr 12), and beyond!

Remember the first time you used Google search? It was like magic. After years of progressively worsening search quality from Altavista and Yahoo, Google was literally stunning, a gateway to the very best things on the internet.

Today, Google has a 90% search market-share. They got it the hard way: they cheated. Google spends tens of billions of dollars on payola in order to ensure that they are the default search engine behind every search box you encounter on every device, every service and every website:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/10/03/not-feeling-lucky/#fundamental-laws-of-economics

Not coincidentally, Google's search is getting progressively, monotonically worse. It is a cesspool of botshit, spam, scams, and nonsense. Important resources that I never bothered to bookmark because I could find them with a quick Google search no longer show up in the first ten screens of results:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/02/21/im-feeling-unlucky/#not-up-to-the-task

Even after all that payola, Google is still absurdly profitable. They have so much money, they were able to do a $80 billion stock buyback. Just a few months later, Google fired 12,000 skilled technical workers. Essentially, Google is saying that they don't need to spend money on quality, because we're all locked into using Google search. It's cheaper to buy the default search box everywhere in the world than it is to make a product that is so good that even if we tried another search engine, we'd still prefer Google.

This is enshittification. Google is shifting value away from end users (searchers) and business customers (advertisers, publishers and merchants) to itself:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/03/05/the-map-is-not-the-territory/#apor-locksmith

And here's the thing: there are search engines out there that are so good that if you just try them, you'll get that same feeling you got the first time you tried Google.

When I was in Tucson last month on my book-tour for my new novel The Bezzle, I crashed with my pals Patrick and Teresa Nielsen Hayden. I've know them since I was a teenager (Patrick is my editor).

We were sitting in his living room on our laptops – just like old times! – and Patrick asked me if I'd tried Kagi, a new search-engine.

Teresa chimed in, extolling the advanced search features, the "lenses" that surfaced specific kinds of resources on the web.

I hadn't even heard of Kagi, but the Nielsen Haydens are among the most effective researchers I know – both in their professional editorial lives and in their many obsessive hobbies. If it was good enough for them…

I tried it. It was magic.

No, seriously. All those things Google couldn't find anymore? Top of the search pile. Queries that generated pages of spam in Google results? Fucking pristine on Kagi – the right answers, over and over again.

That was before I started playing with Kagi's lenses and other bells and whistles, which elevated the search experience from "magic" to sorcerous.

The catch is that Kagi costs money – after 100 queries, they want you to cough up $10/month ($14 for a couple or $20 for a family with up to six accounts, and some kid-specific features):

https://kagi.com/settings?p=billing_plan&plan=family

I immediately bought a family plan. I've been using it for a month. I've basically stopped using Google search altogether.

Kagi just let me get a lot more done, and I assumed that they were some kind of wildly capitalized startup that was running their own crawl and and their own data-centers. But this morning, I read Jason Koebler's 404 Media report on his own experiences using it:

https://www.404media.co/friendship-ended-with-google-now-kagi-is-my-best-friend/

Koebler's piece contained a key detail that I'd somehow missed:

When you search on Kagi, the service makes a series of “anonymized API calls to traditional search indexes like Google, Yandex, Mojeek, and Brave,” as well as a handful of other specialized search engines, Wikimedia Commons, Flickr, etc. Kagi then combines this with its own web index and news index (for news searches) to build the results pages that you see. So, essentially, you are getting some mix of Google search results combined with results from other indexes.

In other words: Kagi is a heavily customized, anonymized front-end to Google.

The implications of this are stunning. It means that Google's enshittified search-results are a choice. Those ad-strewn, sub-Altavista, spam-drowned search pages are a feature, not a bug. Google prefers those results to Kagi, because Google makes more money out of shit than they would out of delivering a good product:

https://www.theverge.com/2024/4/2/24117976/best-printer-2024-home-use-office-use-labels-school-homework

No wonder Google spends a whole-ass Twitter every year to make sure you never try a rival search engine. Bottom line: they ran the numbers and figured out their most profitable course of action is to enshittify their flagship product and bribe their "competitors" like Apple and Samsung so that you never try another search engine and have another one of those magic moments that sent all those Jeeves-askin' Yahooers to Google a quarter-century ago.

One of my favorite TV comedy bits is Lily Tomlin as Ernestine the AT&T operator; Tomlin would do these pitches for the Bell System and end every ad with "We don't care. We don't have to. We're the phone company":

https://snltranscripts.jt.org/76/76aphonecompany.phtml

Speaking of TV comedy: this week saw FTC chair Lina Khan appear on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. It was amazing:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oaDTiWaYfcM

The coverage of Khan's appearance has focused on Stewart's revelation that when he was doing a show on Apple TV, the company prohibited him from interviewing her (presumably because of her hostility to tech monopolies):

https://www.thebignewsletter.com/p/apple-got-caught-censoring-its-own

But for me, the big moment came when Khan described tech monopolists as "too big to care."

What a phrase!

Since the subprime crisis, we're all familiar with businesses being "too big to fail" and "too big to jail." But "too big to care?" Oof, that got me right in the feels.

Because that's what it feels like to use enshittified Google. That's what it feels like to discover that Kagi – the good search engine – is mostly Google with the weights adjusted to serve users, not shareholders.

Google used to care. They cared because they were worried about competitors and regulators. They cared because their workers made them care:

https://www.vox.com/future-perfect/2019/4/4/18295933/google-cancels-ai-ethics-board

Google doesn't care anymore. They don't have to. They're the search company.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/04/04/teach-me-how-to-shruggie/#kagi

[mariclerc]

just finished reading the new chapter of an unexpected role and MORE LILY x GRID INTERACTIONS PLSS

Thank you very much for this request!! I love writing Lily's adventures in the paddock, it seems very cute to me 🥺🥺🥺

An unexpected role (pt.6) | cl16

Summary: you revealed your little secret to your date, you didn't expect he would take it so well. Warning: none, just fluff as usual.

Follow the series!! Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10

Sunlight streams through the window of the Ferrari motorhome. You're sprawled on a plush sofa with Lily, your two-year-old daughter, she sits beside you with a half-eaten cookie clutched in her hand. She giggles as a video plays on your phone, showing her interactions with the Red Bull mechanics earlier.

“Hey amore, are you almost ready?” he calls from another room.

“Almost, just gotta find Lily's lucky socks!” you say smiling.

Lily throws her head back and laughs, cookie crumbs flying everywhere. You scoop her up, tickling her tummy. Visits to the paddock are more frequent now, since the first race you and Lily attended everyone in the paddock and the teams love you both, it's like a breath of fresh air in the paddock, and not to mention the fans, after the initial hatred little by little they gave in and now they adore you two.

“Where did my little lucky charm get all this cookie on her, huh?” you say softly while looking at her.

“Dan-iel!” Lily says.

“Oh, Daniel spoiled you again, didn't he?” you shake your head.

Suddenly footsteps are heard approaching the room.

“There they are! My two favorite girls.” He says entering the room with a playful smile on his face. Charles ruffles Lily's hair, who squeals in delight. “Found those lucky socks yet?”

“Yup, she had hidden them in my bag. Naughty little girl.” You say with a giggle and then lean towards Lily and put on her socks and butterfly shoes.

Charles raises an eyebrow, amusement dancing in his eyes. “How about a pre-race cuddle session to appease the racing gods?”

Lily claps her hands and squirms out of your arms, making a beeline for Charles. He scoops her up, showering her face with kisses.

“Careful, you might give her pre-race jitters!” you say laughing.

Charles winks at you. “Nah, she's got Leclerc blood in her veins, she thrives on competition. Just ask all the mechanics she's been racing around the paddock with today.”

“Speaking of which, did you see the fan videos circulating online? Lily giving Valtteri a high five was adorable.”

“I know, right? It's amazing how much everyone loves having her around. You'd think she's been on the grid since day one.” he smiles softly.

You lean in and kiss Charles softly.

“She brings a different kind of energy to the paddock, doesn't she? Reminds everyone there's more to life than trophies.” you whisper.

“Oh, absolutely! You and Lily are my lucky charms, my whole world! Now come on, let's get this show on the road.” he said while holding you close.

You hand Charles Lily's stuffed bunny, a constant companion on race days.

“Go get 'em, champ! We'll be cheering you on from the pit wall, as always.”

“Always.” he kisses your forehead.

He takes Lily's hand, leading them both out of the motorhome. As they disappear down the hallway, you can't help but smile. Charles may be a racing champion, but in this moment, you and Lily are his biggest victories.

***

Charles emerges from the motorhome, Lily bouncing in his arms, her hair bouncing in a mini ponytail. The paddock is a hive of activity, mechanics bustling with purpose, engineers huddled over laptops, and fans straining for a glimpse of their racing heroes.

A collective gasp rises as Charles appears, Lily's bright eyes taking in the scene with wide-eyed wonder.

“Buongiorno everyone! Ready for another race?” he says while smiling to the fans in the paddock fan-zone area.

The crowd erupts in cheers.

“Forza Charles! And ciao bella Lily!” says a smiling little fan while waving his hand.

“Ci-ao!” Lily says waving her little hand.

Charles chuckles, then spots Logan Sargeant strolling towards them, a grin plastered on his face.

“Leclerc! Looking sharp today, even with your little pre-race mascot.”

Lily reaches out, giggling. “Lo-gan!”

Logan scoops her up in a playful hug, earning another round of cheers from the crowd.

“Looks like you've got some competition this weekend, mate.” Logan giggled.

Charles feigns a frown. “Don't worry, Sargeant. I'm sure I can handle a little competition... Especially when she's this cute.” He winks at Lily, who giggles and buries her face in his neck. Photographers snap pictures like crazy, capturing the adorable interaction.

“Looks like someone's got a lot of fans to sign autographs for today.” You say walking behind them.

“Only the best fans, amore. Now, come on, let's get down to the grid. It's showtime!” He says, handing Lily back to you.

You follow Charles through the throng of fans, Lily nestled comfortably in your arms. As you walk, you hear snippets of conversation, all praising Lily's cuteness and the joy she brings to the paddock.

One little girl, clutching a Ferrari flag, yells out:

“Good luck, Lily! You too, Mr. Leclerc!”

Lily waves enthusiastically at the little girl, a smile splitting her face wide open. You glance at Charles, a silent understanding passing between you. This little girl, surrounded by the roar of the engines and the cheers of the crowd, is exactly where she belongs. The paddock may be her playground for now, but who knows? Maybe one day, she'll be the one stealing the show on the grid.

***

The roar of the crowd intensifies as they approach the grid. Charles, focused on the upcoming race, gives you a quick but reassuring squeeze on the hand.

“Alright ma belle, listen. I gotta get ready. You and Lily find a good spot at the pit wall, alright?”

“Don't worry about us, we'll be your loudest cheerleaders. Go get 'em, champ!” you say while nudging him playfully.

He leans down and kisses Lily's forehead.

“Be good for mama, okay? And remember, papa loves you the most.” he says to Lily and he gives her a little kiss on her cheek.

Lily giggles, clinging to her bunny plushie. A young Ferrari mechanic, a teenage girl with grease stains on her overalls, approaches you both shyly.

“Hey there, little super star. You want to see the car before the race starts? It's super fast, just like you!” the mechanic tells Lily timidly.

Lily's eyes widen with excitement.

“Would you like that, Lily?” you asked Lily while smiling.

Lily nods enthusiastically.

“Thank you so much, that would be amazing!” you tell the mechanic.

The mechanic beams, clearly delighted. “No problem at all! Follow me, little miss.”

The mechanic leads Lily, her eyes sparkling with wonder, towards the gleaming red Ferrari. You watch them go, a warm feeling spreading through your chest. The paddock, once a world of flashing lights and roaring engines, has become a second home, filled with people who adore your little family.

You find a spot at the pit wall, just as Charles takes his position in the cockpit. He looks out towards the crowd, his gaze locking with yours for a brief moment. You give him a thumbs up and a reassuring smile. He nods, a flicker of determination in his eyes.

The lights go out, plunging the grid into an electrifying darkness. Then, with a deafening roar, the engines ignite. Charles is off, a blur of red against the grey asphalt. You hold Lily close, her tiny hands clutching her bunny plushie.

“There he goes, baby! That's papa!”

Lily doesn't take her eyes off the track, her small voice joining the chorus of cheers as Charles battles for position. The race is on, and you know, no matter what the outcome, this day, filled with love, family, and the thrill of the race, the paddock visits will always be one of the best adventures for you and Lily.

***

Lily's eyes are glued to the track, tracing the red blur that is Charles' car with rapt attention. You, however, find yourself drawn to a group of young engineers huddled nearby. Their animated discussion, usually filled with technical jargon, has an undercurrent of worry that sends a shiver down your spine.

You catch snippets of their conversation: "front wing damage," "pit stop for repairs," "crucial time lost." A pit stop this early in the race could throw Charles' entire strategy off balance.

Anxiety gnaws at you, but you force a smile for Lily, brushing back a stray strand of hair from her forehead.

“See that big red car down there, honey? That's papa! He's having a little trouble with his car, but the clever engineers will fix it up in no time, alright?” you whisper softly at Lily.

Lily nods, her brow furrowed in concentration. The little girl beside you, normally brimming with boundless energy, seems to have sensed the tension in the air.

“Why don't we send papa some good luck vibes? Close your eyes really tight and think of the fastest, strongest Ferrari ever!” you whisper again leaning closer to her.

Lily closes her eyes tight, squeezing her stuffed bunny with all her might. You follow suit, a silent prayer forming on your lips for Charles' safety and a successful race.

Suddenly, a flurry of activity erupts in the Ferrari pit lane... Mechanics scramble, tools glinting in the afternoon sun. Charles pulls into the pit box, the red flag forcing an unplanned early stop. You watch with a mixture of apprehension and admiration as the team works with lightning speed, their practiced movements a well-oiled machine.

Just as your heart starts hammering against your ribs, the pit stop ends. Charles, with a fresh wing and a determined glint in his eyes, roars back onto the track.

The red flag is lifted, and the race resumes with renewed intensity. The crowd erupts in cheers, their anticipation hanging heavy in the air. You grab Lily's hand, squeezing it tightly.

“There he goes! Now let's see papa show everyone what a true champion is made of!”

Lily beams, a spark of mischief returning to her eyes. She raises her tiny fist in the air, chanting along with the crowd. “Go papa go! Go papa!” she smiles shyly.

You watch, a rollercoaster of emotions churning inside you, as Charles battles his way back up the field. The race has taken an unexpected turn, but one thing remains certain: your family is in it together, for every pit stop, every thrilling overtake, and every victory (or defeat) that awaits your family on the racetrack.

***

Disappointment hangs heavy in the air as the winner's car streaks past the finish line. Charles follows close behind, his red Ferrari a blur of consolation. The crowd, initially buzzing with anticipation, erupts in a mix of cheers and groans. Lily, perched on your shoulders, scans the track with wide, confused eyes.

“Papa?” Lily asks you with a tender look.

“There he is, honey! Look, it's the red car!” You point to the part of the track where Charles' car is located.

Charles navigates his way through the final corners, bringing the Ferrari to a stop in the designated post-race area. The roar of the engine fades, replaced by a wave of mixed emotions washing over you. While a tiny part of you yearns for the elation of victory, the bigger part swells with pride at Charles' fighting spirit. He may not have secured the top spot, but he fought hard, his skill evident in every daring overtake and smooth maneuver.

Mechanics swarm the car, their faces etched with a mixture of disappointment and respect. Charles emerges from the cockpit, his helmet tucked under his arm. His expression is a mask of controlled emotions, but a flicker of disappointment momentarily clouds his eyes.

He scans the crowd, searching for his family. When he spots you and Lily, a wave of relief washes over him. He strides towards you, a determined glint returning to his eyes.

“There you are! Come here, mes amours.” He says addressing the two of you.

You weave through the throng of fans, a mix of congratulatory pats and sympathetic murmurs on your way to Charles. The air crackles with the post-race energy, a bittersweet symphony of cheers and dejection.

Charles scoops you both into a tight embrace, the familiar scent of adrenaline and sweat wrapping around you. You bury your face in his chest, offering silent comfort for a battle well fought but narrowly lost.

“You were amazing out there, Charles. We're so proud of you.” You whisper as you give him a kiss on the cheek.

“I know it wasn't the win we were hoping for, but...” he kiss your forehead.

He trails off, his gaze falling on Lily, who watches the post-race celebrations with a furrowed brow.

“Hey little champ, what do you say we celebrate papa's second place with some ice cream? How does that sound?” He says smiling at Lily.

Lily's face lights up with a radiant smile, all traces of confusion forgotten. “Ice cream! Yaaay!”

Charles throws his head back and laughs, the sound a welcome release after the tension of the race.

“See? Second place isn't so bad after all, especially when you have the best pit crew a driver could ask for.” He says smiling at you.

He winks at you, the familiar spark back in his eyes. You smile, knowing that win or lose, your family bond remains the strongest trophy of all. Together, you navigate the bustling paddock, Charles and Lily hand in hand, ready to celebrate his second place and the unwavering love that binds them. The race may be over, but the joy of being together remains the most precious victory.

***

As the three of you walk through the paddock, several staff members and the drivers stop to say goodbye to the three of you... In particular, say goodbye to little Lily, since she has become the little princess of the paddock.

Lily lets out a little scream when she sees Oscar. “Osc! Osc!” she says, jumping up and down and smiles when she sees the young Australian. “Mama! Can I... 'ay goodbye to Osc?” She asked you and you smiled at her.

“Of course you can, honey pie! But be careful, okay?” you said sweetly and she let go of your hand and walked towards Oscar.

Charles let out a small chuckle as the two of you looked at Lily walking towards Oscar, Obviously you two followed her closely, but without stopping her little adventure.

Oscar looked down to see Lily, who had a smile from ear to ear. “Oh, hello there little Lily!” He said giving her a smile and bent down to take her in his arms. “What are you doing walking around the paddock alone? You know it's bad, right?” Oscar told her and she just stuck her tongue out at him as a joke.

Lily turned her little head towards you and Charles. “Mama and papa, there Osc!” She said pointing to Oscar where you and Charles were standing, you smiled at the young Australian.

Oscar smiled at the two of you and moved a little closer to you. “Hey, congratulations on the podium Charles!” says Oscar, greeting Charles friendly. “I got scared when I saw Lily walking alone in the paddock... Why did she come towards me?” He asked with a small grimace on his face.

You smiled softly. “Well she wanted to say goodbye to you.”

“Yes... And apparently she fell in love with you.” Charles said softly and Oscar's eyes widened.

“Oh, that’s so cute Lily!” he said as he hugged Lily.

“Bye Osc!” Lily said as she got out of his arms.

Both you and Charles said goodbye to the Australian and headed towards the exit of the paddock with a Lily who was somewhat curious about her surroundings.

***

When you got to the hotel room, Lily was quite exhausted from the day of adventures she had had, so, with the help of Charles, you gave her a bath and put her pajamas on. Between the two of you, you told her a bedtime story while she snuggled with her stuffed bunny Mimi.

Charles leaned down to kiss her forehead. “Sweet dreams my little one. I love you.” he whispered sweetly towards Lily.

“Luv you da!” she said a little sleepy.

You leave the joint room and you stood in your place. Charles turned on his heel and looked at you.

“Are you coming love?” he asked tenderly.

You blinked. “Yes... Yes honey, just give me a moment, okay?” You tell him and he nodded as he walked to the bed that was in the center of the room.

Carefully, you opened your travel bag and took out an envelope with some papers that you had been processing for a couple of months. With the help of Fred, Lorenzo and Pascale you were able to do this, you wanted Charles to officially be Lily's dad... And maybe they don't have a blood relationship or anything else, but the connection that exists between the two of them and, in general, between the three of you, is something incredible and even though neither you nor he are married, the fact that Lily bears his last name is more than enough for you.

You carefully walked back to the room with the envelope behind you. “I would like to give you this.” You whispered softly while you handed him the envelope and he sat on the bed.

He looked at you somewhat confused. “What is this darling?” he asked.

“Find out for yourself... Open it.” you whispered again.

He opened the envelope delicately and took out the papers, some contained the entire legal process to be able to have paternity rights, kinship by affinity and so on, until he reached the last one that said: Lily Marie Leclerc, he looked at you with watery eyes. “Honey... I.” he said with a small voice. “I'm... I'm her dad, chérie... Tell me it's not a dream.”

You smiled at him. “It's not a dream my love, you're officially her dad.” you said and hugged him with all your strength. “Happy Father's Day mon amour!” you whispered and placed several kisses on his face, he couldn't believe it, he was officially a dad.

“Oh god, this is.. This is the best gift I have ever been given in my life! Oh mon cœur, thank you for this!” He said now with happy tears running down his face and you smiled lovingly.

“It's nothing baby boy... I thought, well, we should make it official.” you giggled.

While you two were hugging each other, a new adventure began for your little family... The now Leclerc family and you simply couldn't be happier about this, because you and Lily feel happy, much happier than you both had been before you met him.

[enhanced-operatives-division]

Jury is in it's on there 💯💯

Do I put Careless Whisper on my Starstruck playlist or has that song been too memed to death

[yelenasdiary]

Can I request a familial kate bishop request please where r is her adopted sibling but they struggle with abandonment issues and kate is a supportive sister?

You're My Sister

Pairing: Kate Bishop x Sister! Reader

Summary: When your older sister senses something is wrong, she wants you to know she will always be there for you. 

Comfort

Warnings: Abandonment Issues, Talks of Adoption, Mentions of Depression | 0.9K

AC: Thank you for sending this, I thought it was a great idea! I hope you enjoy! x

Kate had been watching your behavior for the last few weeks, we wondered if maybe somebody at college was giving you a hard time or that maybe it was herself that might have upset you. Anytime she tried to talk to you, all she got was short and sweet answers. You had slowly begun to lock yourself away in your bedroom which only worried your sister even more. 

Dinner tonight was the usual, small talk over a cooked meal with your sister and mother but even the fake smile you had put on didn't convince Kate that you were actually in a better headspace. So, after dinner and when your mother went out for drinks with a friend, Kate made it her little mission to get you to talk. 

You heard a soft knock at your door, you stopped typing your essay on your laptop and unlocked the door. "Can I come in?" Kate asked with a soft smile. You nodded lightly, giving her another fake smile. 

"How's your studying coming along?" Kate asked as she took a seat at the end of your bed while you returned to the seat at your desk. "It's a lot, but I've almost caught up on my assessments" you replied. 

"Anything else new in your life?" She asked, making you question why she was really here to talk to you. 

"Kate, please don't start" your eyes dropped, "If you have something you want to talk about, just do it, save me the stresses" you added. 

"Stresses? What are you talking about?" Kate frowned with concern, "I'm just worried about you sis, you haven't really been yourself lately" she added. You couldn't believe that somebody had actually noticed how unhappy you had become, things in your life were changing. Kate had her little apartment; your mother was barely home anymore, and you had just found out that Kate was going to join the new Avengers team. Where does that leave you? Alone in this big house while you continued to try and do your mother proud at college. 

"Why do you care? You're going to be around less soon anyways" you replied and suddenly it made sense to Kate why you had become so distant. The Bishops had adopted you when you were barely 10 years old and ever since, you've had a hard time trying to cope with the abandonment issues that your birth parents had given you. 

"I'm not going anywhere, you know that, right?" Kate tried to assure you, but it didn't work. 

"Mom is barely home, ever since she met Jack. You're in and out all the time and now you're about to join an Avengers team which means you'll be here just as much as mom, so no, I don't think you're gonna stick around….not when you're probably going to find a better family to be around" you replied in honesty. 

Kate patted the spot next to her, gesturing you sit next to her and with a sigh, you did. "First of all, I am never, ever going to find anymore as cool as you. Who else is going to come late night pranking with me? Who else is going to Jack with me? The dudes a tool" she chuckled, bringing out a real smile on your lips.

"Secondly, I am never going to leave you behind, you're my sister and I only have room for one of those, nobody will ever take your place. You can always count on me to be there, no matter what happens in life and if you think I am going to go off and join an Avengers team with you, you're crazier than mom and that is saying something" 

You couldn't help but chuckle once more at your sister's love. It dawned on you that you allowed your thoughts to convince you that Kate would abandon you like almost everybody else in your life already had. "Do you mean that?" You asked, looking up at her. Kate nodded as she wrapped an arm around you and pulled you in for a tight hug, "you're stuck with me, even when I annoy the shit out of you, remember that" She smiled softly when you hugged her back just a tightly. 

"Thank you Kate, I really needed to hear that and I'm sorry that I've been distant lately….i just, I didn't want to worry you with my stupid problems" you replied once you both pulled away. 

"I rather have you worry me with what's on your mind than being closed off and feeling alone. You know, sometimes I think one day you're going to go off with your friends and forget about me but then I remind myself that I'm actually a lot cooler than anybody else in the world and you would miss me too much" your sister replied, making you playfully shake your head at her. 

"I can't wait for you say something like that in front of the Avengers" you said. Kate laughed, "oh no, I can't do that. Being the coolest on earth is actually my secret power. I wouldn't wanna make them feel uncool" 

"You're actually just a goof ball" you chuckled. 

"A goof ball that is craving a pizza with her sister, what do you say?" She asked. "Yeah, I was kind of thinking the same thing, moms cooking skills are slowly, slowly getting there" you replied, causing you both to chuckle once more.

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[cookiesandcrumbs]

Welcome to the Mature collection by me, Cookiesandcrumbs featuring Ravensim and Faaeish!

This whole thing took over a year. More than 365 days. It started as a small celebration in honour of my sugar besties deciding to surprise me with a new laptop because mine was starting to say bye. This after they'd already bought me a phone because my phone had started to say bye. Let it be known I did not ask them to buy me anything, they did that for their own selfish reasons (their words, not mine) full well knowing I would not be able to Interact at all without it. So this whole thing exists because of @whirliko and @iliketodissectsims! My unyielding love goes out to them. Thanks to @ravensim and @faaeish for participating! I don't like doing hair and accessory so it's thanks to them this collection have them. Minus the Klas hair I did but it's just a texture on bald head what can i tell you. Thanks to my wifey @/iliketodissectsims for removing textures on two items for me to use as base AND for Old Lady model, love you sugar bestie. Thanks to @noir-pixels for giving me models styled in the items, love you!!

BGC

20 packages

All the necessary lods, maps and all that hoopla

Mostly not gender or frame restricted 

No randoms 

This is FREE and so it shall STAY at all times

Include however just credit where it’s due!

For more info please do scroll through the pdf file I made

DOWNLOAD the 10+ Cover and back page pdf file I made for this to get a better look and to download the items on the order form on the last page. Yes, order form. You can click the links on it and directly download from there. For free! Or check under the cut for the page previews plus download there as well.

Main folder downloads for this whole things via mediafire. This post is very long and a little bit messy but I think that's okay. Hopefully i didn't forget anything. Anyway. Hope you have a good day!

Pinterest pin for the collection.

[bizarre-blorbo-bracket]

FINAL for real this time: Davis (Juror 8) from Twelve Angry Men vs the Bimodal Distribution from statistics

Propaganda under the cut, and it's REALLY worth it:

Davis (Juror 8) (these are all from the single submitter)

a quick lil list babes, and I apologise for all of this in advance:

He's from the fucking film 12 angry men. like, aside from letterbox bootlickers and middle school hass students NO ONE has watched this film let alone care about it, it was made in 1957, is shot almost exclusively in one room and the entire film is just middle aged white men yelling at each other over whether some not white poor kid should be sent to the electric chair. what the fuck.

Henry Fonda, the actor, was 52 years old at the time of filming

Henry Fonda is the father of Jane Fonda, the woman who would revolutionise the 80's with her home workouts and her blindingly neon leg warmers.

His name wasn't revealed until the very end of the film and even then it's just "Davis."

I could honestly give him a lil smooch

He's absolutely not girlypop but he's the ally-iest ally who's ever allied

He's categorised as a "Benevolent Leader" on the Heroes Wiki

instead of the overwhelming urge for me to coddle him like most all other blorbos, i would appreciate it switched

I have a photo of him inside my saxophone case and sometimes i forget he's in there, then he creeps into my saxophone bell and when I play it he shoots out like a ballistic missile

Dude, on ao3 there's more fanfiction about the real life 80's British punk band The Clash than the entire film of 12 angry men, let alone Davis (80 fics come up under the clash, while 10 come up for 12 angry men)

I have a counter, and I've watched 12 Angry men a total of 145 times. The figure is up on my wall in tallies. whenever the number goes up, I like to watch it in 5's so then I can put another full group of tallies on my wall.

I have incredibly detailed stories about how Davis would boogie down to ringo starr's solo career, and they're written within the margins of a book called Tobruk written by Peter Fitzsimons. The only reason I reread that book is to wonder at my elaborate works of fiction

My HASS teacher was the one to introduce me to 12 Angry Men as he played it for the entire class. He gave us a set of questions to complete on the film and a few Law based questions as a little treat, and he expected it to be handed in the next day. What he didn't expect was an 11 page monster of a response that included social commentary, 4 paragraphs dissecting the character of Davis alone, deeply discussed comparisons between the landscapes of politics and law in the 50's to the present, and basically an entire point-for-point summarisation of the film, completed with obscure quotes from Truman, Eisenhower, Nixon and Presley (Elvis). He presented the printed masterpiece in front of the entire class to shame me.

After class he explained how his favourite Juror would either be 6 or 5, because 6 seems like a big dumb teddybear and he just liked 5. I explained how I liked Davis because he didn't want to send a kid to die, then he told me how Davis would make a good cowboy (at this point in time I was unaware of Henry Fonda's role in Once Upon A Time in The West) and I proceeded to go home and write a 3 part orchestral composition that I could pretend would play as the soundtrack to Juror 8: A Cowboy's Tale or something like that

I had started to make an animation meme starring Davis but only gave up when photoshop literally deleted itself from my laptop

I didn't even hear that Juror 8's name was Davis when I first watched it in class, somehow I only heard it on my 6th rewatch but when I did I literally got so excited I literally got winded and cried a little bit, I had to take a panadol because I got so lightheaded

I have learned the musical motif that plays throughout the film on saxophone, clarinet, recorder, guitar, bass, ukulele, piano and trumpet

I have visions of him

One of Davis' 3 children HAS to be gay and nothing can convince me otherwise

honest to god I'd be a home wrecker if it came to him

I quote not only Davis but the film a lot, and sometimes in the dead silence of all my friends I go on about how the old man couldn't have possibly made it to the door in such a short amount of time to see the kid running down the stairs (because the old man has a limp, and Davis proved it my limping around the room, which I have to say was incredibly attractive of him)

He's literally an architect

I once had a dream where Davis was in my bass guitar case when I opened it, and i literally just picked him up and started picking him like a bass guitar until I tried to play a full chord and he bit the hand that was meant to be on the fretboard. I dropped him and he fell on his ass, and when I said "what the hell dude what was that for" he said bass chords are lowkey ugly to listen to, and since then i don't like playing bass chords because now they're lowkey ugly to listen to. before this ordeal, i enjoyed them, but alas

i once got my romantic partner to write me a davis x reader fanfiction as a birthday present

my parents believe that Davis is my first celebrity crush, and while they're actually wrong it's still actually so embarrassing they believe that because OH MY GOD it's literally JUROR 8 FROM 12 ANGRY MEN

I've attempted slam poetry about him

I've eaten a paper printed full a4 size photo of his hand

I would also not mind him to be literally my father, but given the rest of the things I've just said about him that's really weird and I recognise that

the Bimodal Distribution

First of all, it's a math concept. that is already pretty bizarre of a thing to be blorbo-ifying. Second of all, I don't know any calculus, and I don't consider myself a math person (because I hate arithmetic), but I really like this guy for some reason. I mean this graph clearly holds the secrets of the universe. don't you just want to l o o k at it . like you could solve everything in the world with that boy

[do-you-have-a-flag]

a moment to rant about technology again (i've made variations of this post before but i keep thinking about it so here we are again)

my five year old laptop can no longer send or receive files from my three year old android phone, it's always struggled with bluetooth sharing, and these last couple years it completely stopped working.

for a while i would plug in my phone directly via a usb cable that i had to use with an adaptor since they keep removing ports on mac laptops.

the android file transfer app i was using got discontinued, the only options i have now are a subscription model app or 3rd party cloud storage.

So now if i want to get a file off my phone onto my computer i have to connect to the internet, log in to an account, wait for file upload, log in on my computer, wait for file download, hope there's no connection disruptions that break the process, hope there's no security concerns for hosting my files on an external server, and stay at the mercy of the free file hosting space limitations.

reminder: this is the only option when the ability to locally transfer for free using a cable i paid a few dollars for years ago is taken away from me.

OKAY annoying. i don't want to buy a new laptop or phone because frankly there are no actual improvements on the tech i would be paying for essentially slightly better function and dealing with a bunch of ad ons i do not want...

a more extreme example: I have a hand me down apple tv that's now 12 years old. this thing does not have an app store. earlier this year they removed the netflix app from it.

if i screenshare to the apple tv from my laptop to try and watch netflix from my laptop on the big screen it will stop displaying video.

the only way to watch netflix on the apple tv is to play it on my laptop while I use the same adaptor i use to plug in usbs to plug in a hdmi cable. kind of limits the portability of a laptop but whatever.

i will grant you over 10 years is a long time for support servicing a device, but at least newer apple tvs still run netflix on them.

the tv, the apple tv, the laptop, my phone, all things purchased full price years ago, all things that USED TO communicate fine, but every now and then an operating system will update and oops this feature or app you use regularly that you paid for won't run anymore! better pay a forever subscription for a totally different service! better buy a whole new device!

I like technology, but i think convenience stops being a convenience the second you have to pay unlimited money for it forever, the second it stops working completely if there's a minor network issue, the second it forces you to replace it every year, the second it impedes your right to repair. is it even convenient to rent access to everything?

in 2024 we had a power outage that lasted about a day, a complete network outage that also lasted for several hours and effected both wifi and network data, a tech outage that took down multiple services including eftpos for about a day. Sometimes power, internet, and electronics in general will crap out on you. it happens.

during the power outage I read a book. during the network outage i had mp3s and mp4s and cds and dvds. during the tech outage i had just enough cash to pay for the pet food when we discovered mid grocery trip that no one could pay by card.

I like the convenience of streaming and wireless sharing , i like not having to lug around multiple devices and a tangle of cables. but i also like not having to pay for wasteful tech. i also like owning the things i like. i also like having things that work and stay working until they're worn out instead of until a new version is released.

it's not about being a prepper or cutting off technology entirely. it's about having OPTIONS, it's about having something that functions for longer than 2 years, it's about having alternatives to apps and log ins and QR codes and 2fa.

it's great, for instance, to use your phone to hop on a train, look at a menu and place an order in a restaurant with a discount thanks to the points you have. but it is also good that i still have a physical travel card for public transport that i can just casually put in the hand of a guest who is visiting and shouldn't have to pay for an equally generic travel card for only 2 days of use. no id tied to it, just a piece of plastic with a fare already on it. lets say your phone dies while you're out and about. you have the travel card physically so you use that, you can' check your account balance with an atm and use the physical bank card instead of taping your phone, even if there's an issue with eftpos you might still cary some cash for a meal, and you wouldn't have to wait to pay back a friend you split a bill with if you have cash.

i think for sure rewards apps are useful, sure, however i think it feels extremely dubious security and privacy wise that we go from place to place leaving a trail of data with our spending habits. that already happens online of course but it doesn't have to happen in the real world.

why are we saying yes scan my face yes scan my fingerprint yes have data on what i buy and where i go and my contacts list and my files and my reading and viewing habits and my games. why are we acting as if linking all the services we have that data shared to with each other is going to be secure when the more businesses that demand these analytics the more our identifying information is at risk due to a wide web of possible weak points.

and circling back to the planed obsolescence thing, way too often the upgrades proposed to us is to trade ownership for forever-subscription access to libraries that have no interest in hosting their content if it's not profitable, or applications and services that harvest data and sell it to advertisers or scrape it for other products where the users provide free labour.

and what new conveniences are we sold? rent your phone it has ai assistants that are built from stolen data and will feed on your data so it can be sold and then a year from now when you're just about to have paid the same price you would have to purchase it outright you'll notice it's battery life has gone to shit and it's software has become weirdly unstable and you know you can get a great deal on the newer model!

but isn't it soooo convenient

you get a discount for 6 months on this streaming service and auto-predict on your texts in a different hat and an image generation feature so you can poorly edit your photos by adding in mulched pixels.

it's so convenient scan your fingerprint and tap your locked phone to check out faster at this self service bay where you don't have enough space and scan all the items yourself without a conveyor belt to organise them and you can't leave without a receipt because this way the store doesn't have to pay for more staff. some day your location will get those cameras that automatically scan your items as you walk around the store that definitely are run on ai and not just poor people working remotely checking the footage manually we prommyyyyy.

pay for 5 different streaming services to skip ads it's soooooo much more convenient than free to air tv or paid tv or the radio where you get ads. except sometimes you do still get ads unless you pay more and we won't let you share with friends and maybe we'll delete that show you were watching that we never produced a home release dvd set for.

we have screen sharing and wireless sharing and all kinds of watch together features but you have to get the newest version of our product it's so convenient just buy it again or be left behind even though your tv or phone or computer otherwise works fine. because you know if you pay for this service forever and get your friends to sign up with your code they get a discount! for a month! and the friends and family plans mean we get all kinds of linked data! share to your contacts! use our ai assistant to compose a message to your friends! share a link to this funny video with all the junk in the url so the video platform knows the age location device model and login id of the person you're sharing to! it's so convenient!

whatever. do whatever you want with your own tech useage. but maybe every now and then put your phone on airplane mode, maybe get cash out and go to a second hand bookstore or a cinema or a small cafe with friends, or if you prefer- go to a rave in an underpass or a music gig in an alt bar. take photos on a camera with an sd card. take photos on someone's polaroid camera. borrow a cd from your local library, rip the audio from it, make a mixtape, put it on a usb you covered in stickers, lend it to a friend. dig around second hand stores and online marketplaces for old mp3 players and get a pair of cheap aux headphones and listen to music free without ads.

you can still video call a friend so they can see their favourite singer live, or tip your driver who got you home at 2am, or watch an obscure foreign movie that went out of distribution in the 2000s, or find and order the exact model of a part you need to fix your vacuum using image search identification from a photo you took, or create a group chat with all your family members to share an announcement. there is legitimate convenience in tech.

I just want to advocate for backwards compatibility and a variety of options in preferences towards usage and ownership. I don't think that's too much to ask.

profits will always win out over privacy but i have a right to complain about it.