#and my friend sitting beside me laughed and asked if i made it a habit to give people fake names

[plant-dad-sulu]

continuing the saga of Changing My Name And Pronouns Has Turned My Life Into A Bad Sitcom i've been easing the new name into my life not by telling people to change what they call me but by introducing myself to new people with that name and just not correcting previous people who still call me by my first name

this includes the fact that i have registered with a university for my second bachelors degree using my new name and still have not told my parents i use a different name so stay tuned to find out whether they hear about it sometime in the next 4 years or if they get a fun surprise at my graduation

[moonstruckme]

absolutely begging for a part 2 of the sirius angst blurb with reader being more distant during sex and sirius notices. obviously take your time and take care of yourself!! mwah mwah mwah. thank you for EVEN reading this request.

Thank you for requesting my love!

cw: smut mdni, p in v, miscommunication trope

part 1

fwb!Sirius x fem!reader ♡ 1.5k words

You think you’ve been doing a fairly decent job of staying out of your own head. You’re keeping intentionally focussed on Sirius’ body and the things it does to you. His tattooed biceps flexing, hands clutching your hips to guide your movements, pretty, perfect mouth forming your name. 

He says it again, getting your attention. Reluctantly, you meet his eyes. Sirius grins wickedly.

“Someone’s quiet today. You with me, gorgeous?” 

“Mhm.” You lay a hand over his chest and lean forward to drive him deeper inside you. 

He curses at the new fit, and you grin in a way you hope looks normal, clenching your walls around him. 

“Fuck,” Sirius hisses. “That’s my girl.” 

It’s like someone’s thrown a bucket of water on the heat in your core. Your stomach drops embarrassingly, because you’re not his girl. He’d made the restrictions of your arrangement very clear when he’d spoken to Remus last week. Why would Sirius call you that when you both know it’s not true? 

“Hey.” The boy beneath you catches on to your shift in mood quicker than you would have expected. He looks up at you bemusedly, his grip on your hips turning from possessive to conscientious. “You okay? Wanna stop?” 

You shake your head before you can think. “No, let’s keep going.” 

You try to find your rhythm again, but Sirius doesn’t match you. Dark brows descend over stormcloud eyes. 

“I don’t want to do anything you’re not into, dollface.” 

“You’re not,” you huff. 

He looks at you for a second, gaze unabashedly scrutinizing. “You’re upset,” he deduces. 

You laugh, incredulous. “I am not.” 

But Sirius has made his decision. His grasp on your hips strengthens again as he lifts you enough to pull out, slipping from underneath you and sitting up by your pillows. You purse your lips but put your underwear—a thong you hope he doesn’t think was for his benefit—back on when he does, taking the shirt he tosses you and tugging it over your head. 

Sirius sprawls out on his side, propping his chin on a hand. “Why the pout, hm?” 

“I’m not pouting.” 

He grins. “Yeah, you are.” 

And fine, you are, but not because of him. Because you’re still pissed at yourself for being hurt. For thinking, foolishly, that you would be fine with having Sirius over when he’d texted you that he was in the mood despite still nursing your wound from just a week before. Mortified at yourself for ever having cared, and worse for caring still. 

Sirius’ eyes soften as if he’s seen something in your expression. His grip is gentle beneath the teasing as he tugs you down by your arm, encouraging you to lay beside him. 

“Wanna tell me why?” he asks.

You do, actually. It makes frustration prickle over your skin to think about how much you’d love to tell him about this. You’d fallen into the habit, stupidly, of spilling your guts to Sirius about most things. He was already one of your closest friends, but with this new level of intimacy between you…you’d lost sight of boundaries that had existed for a reason. 

The last thing either of you need is for you to burden him with your emotions about this. 

“I’m not pouting,” you say again, obstinately. 

Sirius frowns. His hand crosses the short distance to your hip, one finger running absentmindedly over the hem of his shirt you’ve thrown on. 

“Something’s upset you,” he muses. “Is it me?” 

“No,” you say. 

Something flickers in Sirius’ eyes. “Liar.” 

Your lips part to argue, but it’s no use. He looks too certain. “How do you do that?” 

His lips quirk, but there’s not much humor in his expression. “It’s a gift. Gonna tell me how I fucked up, pretty girl?” 

You shake your head. “You didn’t do anything wrong.” 

It’s the truth this time, and Sirius can see it. His brow creases in puzzlement. 

“M’sure I did at some point,” he says softly. His fingers push the cotton of his t-shirt up your side, toying with your underwear. “You’re just too nice to blame me for it.” 

His knuckle brushes your hip as he runs his finger along the thin, silken fabric of your thong, and you don’t stop your eyes from going to the motion. You whisper, “Why do you touch me like this?” 

For a moment, Sirius’ expression shutters. “I thought this was what we did.” His voice is quiet, not quite question and not quite answer. “Do you not want me to touch you?” 

You do, too much. But for different reasons. Not just because you’re friends with this extra element to your relationship. You want him to touch you with something more. You want to touch him back in the same way, uninhibited. 

“It’s fine,” you say. 

“No, hey.” Sirius slips his finger from your thong. The fabric snaps back into place without much bite. “Don’t say that.” 

“What do you want me to say?” 

He looks hurt you would ask. “Say what you’re thinking.” 

You blow out a breath, rolling onto your back. You don’t want to look at him, but you can still feel his gaze on you, searching and worried. 

“It’s my fault,” you say, “okay? It’s really nothing to do with you, I just…got a bit caught up in all this and started feeling things I know we agreed not to.” You sneak a glance at him, eyes shooting back to the ceiling when they accidentally meet his. “I couldn’t help it, but I’m trying to get past it.” 

You hear Sirius’ hand whisper against the sheets as it inches towards you. It stops partway. “That’s alright,” he says, a gentleness you can’t bear in his voice. “Why would you think that’s something you had to hide from me? It’s bound to happen with these things.” 

You smile wryly. “Oh, because you’re so irresistible?” 

“I mean, for one thing.” You can feel the tingling of his grin directed at you, but it fades as he sobers. “But also just because it’s natural, you know? I think we were both a bit too sure of ourselves when we started doing this. It’s not so easy to separate out as we thought.” 

You turn your head to look at him. “You don’t seem to have any trouble.” 

Sirius’ eyebrows rise. “Why would you think that?” 

“Because…” You gesture flippantly with a hand. “Because of what you said to Remus last week. We’re just friends, no?” 

Sirius stills for a moment, and then the breath goes out of him in a single, long exhale. He lets his chin drop from his hand, resting his head on a curled arm. “You were privy to that conversation, were you?” 

You shrug. “James’ bathroom door isn’t as soundproofed as we thought.” 

He chuckles. “Guess we should have been more quiet.” 

You smile halfheartedly, and Sirius’ humor fades. He looks at you carefully. If you didn’t know him better, you’d think he was attempting the odd and unconventional practice of thinking before he speaks. 

“I’m not sure I said anything to Moony about what I was thinking,” he says after a minute. “I spoke about the terms of our arrangement, but I sort of avoided…putting my own feelings in the mix.” 

You’re not so careful with your words. After a week of stewing, you don’t have the patience. “What’s that supposed to mean?” 

Sirius laughs through his nose like he can sense your agitation. “Just that I was more so making presumptions about how you felt than volunteering information on my own situation.” His hand creeps closer, making shushing noises against the sheets, until his fingertips are teasing your own. It sends zaps of energy all the way up your arm to the tips of your toes. You curl your legs in closer to you. “I didn’t want to embarrass myself,” Sirius says. “I was some pining twit who’d started having sex with a friend and then couldn’t keep my own feelings under control. What kind of idiot does that?” 

You feel your lips twitch. Sirius’ grin slashes across his face. “Yeah, I don’t know anyone that daft,” you say. 

His laugh is low and belly-deep. “Can I hug you, please?” 

“Yeah,” you sigh, feigning reluctance despite the commotion in your stomach that’s getting harder to ignore. 

You start to sit up, but Sirius rolls right on top of you, pressing you into the bed and needling his arms underneath your shoulders. He smushes his cheek to yours. 

“I’m sorry if I hurt your feelings, dollface,” he says, words breezing over your ear. “I could have saved us both a lot of time if I’d manned up and spoken to you about it.” 

You cross your wrists over his back and bring your knees up so they’re squeezing his sides. Sirius makes a ridiculously pleased humming sound. “It’s okay. I wasn’t planning on talking to you either.” 

He laughs, turning his face into yours so the sound vibrates against your temple. “One of us is going to have to pick up some emotional intelligence, else we’ll need James to referee our every interaction.” 

You squeeze him tight, happiness like a bubble close to bursting in your chest. “I dunno,” you say, and Sirius is clearly chuffed at the audible smile in your voice. He stamps a firm kiss of approval to your hairline. “I think we’ve done alright.” 

Contentment oozes from his tone, too. “Yeah, I suppose so.” 

[janovavalen]

✧when social media calls so does the questions || walker scobell x fem!reader

summary: after fans have created more and more of a scene with y/n l/n and walker scobell they are asked about it in their first interview together.

warning: friendly reminder the people/faces i use are just for the aesthetic ofc imagine it’s you bc we’re on that level of delulu<3

as they day went by y/n sat in her hotel room with her dressers, makeup and nail artist all around . this was probably one thing y/n enjoyed about being who she was and doing what she did.

she got to say there while people made her look pretty at the amazing work they did on her. however, though some of the dresses and suits she had to wear were sometimes out of the ordinary or just tight in general, they always made sure to capture her natural color and make her outfits look beautiful on her.

today y/n would be getting interviewed after she got ready—so was aryan, leah and walker of course. she was beyond nervous, exited? but definitely mostly nervous. she hated when she had to sit in front of a camera—well, it came more naturally when she was acting because she wasn’t really being herself.

but when it came to being interviewed, she was half of the time being told what to say, monitored at all times and some other genuine answers were cut out. she guessed it would probably be more dramatic for the audience and the interviewer.

‘miss. l/n, your being called’ one of her managers called out to her as she was just getting her last piece of clothing on.

‘oh—okay!’ she called back. as her stylist got her finished up and ready she smiled and thanked everyone who gave her a huge smile back while they waved her goodbye.

but before she could leave, she obviously had to take some pictures.

ㆍ୨୧ㆍ

the second y/n stepped out of her hotel room was as if on the sam strike as the rest of her friends. aryan, leah and walker came out of their separate room with their outfits on.

leah wore a beautiful dress and her afro, aryan wore a simple green shirt and black pants and walker wearing a black jacket with dark blue jeans.

‘okay why is it only me and leah going all out for these outfits?’ y/n placed her hands out motioning to the fact the boys were dressed as if they were going out on a casual walk and y/n and leah to the met gala.

‘well…talk to my styalist with that because i can’t give you an answer’ aryan commented with a smile as y/n laughed a bit. holding her phone in her hand along with her purse.

walker had subconsciously found himself waiting for her to walk beside him which didn’t go unnoticed by aryan and leah.

ㆍ୨୧ㆍ

as the group walked outside was then the lights began flashing in a hurry. the dark sky around them already causing enough ruckus to other people trying to sleep in the hotel, y/n and the group has stopped to give the crowd what they want.

their pictures.

as they did y/n and walker stood arm to arm. him holding the back of his hand along the back half of her back.

while they smiled, waved, posed and did some silly things out of habit. they finally seen their car was ready, signaling it was time to go, so they all began to walk.

but as y/n did she had felt her shoe get caught on something causing her to stop for a second, walker behind somehow able to feel her presence stopped immediately and looked down to her shoe.

‘oh—wait i got it it’s okay—‘

‘no wait let me help’ walker pulled back and leaned down on his knee to see her heel was stuck on the vent of the ground outside. once he got it out someone yelled—‘it’s like a real life cinderella story!’ causing the crowed to awh and flash their cameras faster.

y/n placed her hand over her mouth and nervously laughed as did walker who placed his hand back against her back and let it hold there as they walked.

when they got in the car they immediately sighed of relief from the outside media not being able to get as good pictures but still tired of course.

‘i don’t think ill ever get over this—the lights might be the cause of me going blind to be honest’ leah mumbled while holding her head in her hands, enjoying the heat of the car in this time of day which was a bit cold outside.

‘yeah, i think we should i hide all night and only take pictures in the day or something so they don’t use pictures’

‘that just gives me even more the reason to stay home, so i’m going along with that plan’ y/n smiled at aryan who laughed.

as they drove to their destination, they all had to take pictures and of course videos for their spam’s and personal cameras rolls for memory’s.

ㆍ୨୧ㆍ

when they arrived to their interview destination, the four of them sat in their chairs.

leah and y/n sat next to each other. walker and scobell seated next to each other—so the order being leah, y/n, walker, and aryan.

‘okay, are you guys ready?’ the interviewer asked with a warm smile, they all nodded their heads and y/n gave a nervous thumbs up as she smiled making walker laugh.

‘okay, we’re on in—3,2,1–‘

looking a bit over at the camera pointed towards her she started—‘hello my name is racheal james and i am here with—‘

‘leah jeffries’ she smiled

‘y/n l/n’ she nervously twisted with her hands—

‘walker scobell’ who gave a smile and soon—‘aryan simhardi’ who waved to the camera.

‘hi! hello, welcome hope things went well as you got here?’

‘uh yeah—y’know, paparazzi, yelling, lights—it went amazing’ walker looked at the racheal who laughed, y/n smiled a bit while she touched a bit of her face as leah and aryan laughed a bit.

‘as usual, as usual—so! i have been dying to ask, how did you guys all get along when you were casted for percy jackson?’

‘uhm, we did pretty good? i mean i came in a bit late since my character doesn’t show up till episode four so i got a bit more time to pack at home but y’know, i think i get along with them amazingly’

‘yeah—i mean, when we all met y/n she was very warm and an inviting person, every funny and so energetic i just love her presence’ walker told while looking at y/n who warmly smiled and placed her hand over her mouth.

‘okay! the two of them!? i can’t! they always do this! it’s constant—‘ leah pointed at the two as she yelled and laughed making y/n and walker nervously laugh.

‘that’s what i was going to say! is it always like that?’ racheal smiled at them.

‘oh my—yes! all the time. on set, at dinner, hang outs—anywhere!’ aryan commented while y/n shook her head with a eye roll and walked just smiled, his face red.

‘okay but wait—so, as you all know, the comments on instagram are going insane over walker and y/n i wanted to ask how do you two feel about it? is it uncomfortable? is it truth or just fans being fans?’

‘uhm….i wouldn’t call them fans just more of very distant friends and family? but im not uncomfortable with it all all—‘

‘yeah no i’m not either, it’s kinda funny and amusing to see everyone piece things together more than some do in the show’ walker shrugged as y/n laughed.

‘ou? so, are you denying or backing up on the rumors that the famous (c/n) and percy jackson may be lovers outside of percy jackson?’

leah immediately looked at aryan who’s eyes snapped to walker and y/n.

the two of them nervously touched their faces while shrugging—‘i—um?’

‘yeah, so…y’know?’ the lot laughed as they watched the two teens nervously try to figure out what to say.

‘okay! i’m sorry i’m sorry to make you uncomfortable! let’s just move onto the next question yeah?’ she smiled while flipping through papers.

y/n placed her hand over her face and sighed deeply to calm herself as for walker who looked at her with a smile and a red warm face.

ㆍ୨୧ㆍ

about a couple hours later when the interview was done y/n and walker decided to split from the group who had happened to all want to go out to dinner just to hang out.

walker badly wanted to be with y/n but not when she was occupied with the other group, so he pulled her away from the group for a little bit just to talk which y/n didn’t mind in the slightest.

the two of them were standing on the sidewalk as they talked and laughed together.

‘when she asked what was going on in the comments i’m not going to lie i kind of freaked out like i was like—dude what the hell do i say? what do i do?’ walker revealed as he sheepishly moved a bit closer to y/n who did as well.

‘oh my god—same, i was so nervous i didn’t know what i was going to day next to try and recover from that’ she laughed as walker nodded his head in agreement while he placed a small hand on her arm which she didn’t take note of.

after a laugher died down a bit, the two of them stood in a bit of silence as they felt the cold air breeze past them. since y/n wore a outfit that had no jacket, walker had given her his jacket back at the restaurant after seeing cold chills on her arm.

as y/n held her arms with the jacket getting warmer, walker couldn’t held but admire how pretty she looked under the yellow light of the street pole next to them.

‘you looked really pretty’ he smiled as she placed a hand over her mouth to smile widely before placing it back down to her side.

‘thank you…your not too bad yourself’ she teased as he faked a gasp making her laugh. this only prompted him to go after her with his arms around her shoulders as she laughed out loud while he moved their bodies to the side aggressively.

her face being mashed between chest and arm.

‘oh my god! my makeup!’ she cried out with a laugh as he completely ignored her with his own laughter.

once they were done moving he leaned down to give her a kiss on her cheek making the both of them grow warm and red. she smiled deeply while placing her arms around his waist. the two of them embracing each other in the dead of night.

yourinstagram

liked by dior.n.goodjohn, leahavajeffries, aryansimhardi , yourmom and others 

yourinstagram if you guys don’t know…i’m literally terrified of doing almost anything thanks to final destination

view all comments

dior.n.goodjohn dude imagine the cars just blowing up out of nowhere while you guys were driving it…

↳ yourinstagram I WAS IMAGINING THAT THE WHOLE TIME WHILE WALKER JUST LAUGHED LIKE WHATS FUNNY?

↳ walker.scobell IT WAS FUNNY BC U WERE CRYING 😭!?

↳ yourinstagram that was supposed to stay between us.😒

↳ walker.scobell oh. 

iamcharliebushnell that’s insane you thought that while driving the whole time

↳ leahsavajeffries i would’ve just got off at that point 😭

↳ walker.scobell oh trust she tried but i didn’t let her leave me on there alone after i paid for that

user282 AHHH MORE WALKER AND Y/N CONTENT<33333

user200 they’re hand feeding us at this point bc omg😭

user1011 i literally love them sm—DID YALL SEE THOES PAPARAZZI PICS OF THEN CUDDLED UP OUTSIDE???

↳ yourinstagram PAPARAZZI PICS?

walker.scobell

liked by yourinstagram, leahsavajeffries, dior.n.goodjohn, aryansimhardi and others

walker.scobell i think y/n enjoys my phone more than her own phone

view all comments

yourinstagram i enjoy your phone bc u have storage 🧍🏽‍♀️

↳ walker.scobell OUUUU so just take all mine? got it got it

↳ yourinstagram DONT ACT FUNNY ON HERE BC U TOLD ME TOO U TOLD ME IT WAS OKAY!?

↳ walker.scobell *gulps*

dior.n.goodjohn LOOK AT MY CHILDRENNNNB OMG

iamcharliebushnell they grow up so fast☹️

↳ walker.scobell why r u guys acting like your nearing your eighties

user111 LOOK AT THEMMMNM OMG GGOGMGMGMGMGM

user1034 they’re cuties

user77 i can’t believe they’re actually together like someone don’t pinch me if this is a dream i don’t wanna wake up from it

↳ yourinstagram awh😭?

↳ walker.scobell okay this is adorable though

walker.scobell

liked by walker.scobell, dior.goodjohn, iamcharliebushnell and others

walker.scobell no comment

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dior.n.goodjohn GET THHHHHHHHHHHH SHHHHH OUT PF HERE OMG

iamcharliebushnell okay but how many times have they hung out without us is the real question

leahsavajeffries alright yall not to much

↳ walker.scobell HUH😭

yourmom i’m so happy you make her happy☺️

↳ walker.scobell awh mrs.l/n

↳ yourinstagram awh mom STOP☹️

yourinstagram that busted up camera ain’t give no promises

↳ walker.scobell that’s what happens when you drop it like thirty times…

user11000 LOOK AT THEM GUYSSSSSS AHHHH

user220 i’m so happy i shipped them the second i saw them on screen together and irl

user1479 the fact they are literally two half’s of a whole is proof soulmates are real

taglist: @callsignwidow

[goldfades]

nika is so hates everyone but soft only for my gf like cmon

oh for sure, she is like down bad for her girlfriend ALWAYS

─ word count | 736

─ warnings | mean nika to everyone else, sweet nika to you (duh), paige being dramatic, nothing else

NIKA LAID ON the couch, scrolling on TikTok after a particularly hard practice.

Geno had them go a little harder today because he wanted to push them. She didn't blame him, obviously there was nothing wrong with wanting to push his players to be the best ─ however, it hasn't even been an hour since practice ended and no one had left the gym because of how sore they were.

Nika's muscles already felt like they were screaming at every movement she made. She winced as she shifted on the couch, trying to find a more comfortable position.

"Nika," She heard someone called as she whipped her head to see who was talking. Behind her was Paige, a frown on her face as she winced to sit on the couch next to her. "What are you doing after this?"

"What are you doing after this?" She repeated at Paige, annoyance in her experience. "Going to sleep and showering, obviously. What could I possibly do other than that?"

"I was just asking, jeez." Paige rolled her eyes as she yawned, leaning backward. "Can you get me some water from the kitchen, I can't feel my legs."

"No," Nika said plainly as she continued to scroll on TikTok, keeping her gaze locked on her screen. Paige just glared at her but before she could respond, Nika's phone begin to ring.

Nika's face beamed as she quickly answered it. "Hey, baby. What's up?" Her voice was a stark contrast to how she was talking Paige just moments ago ─ it was soft and warm, and especially loving.

"Yeah, sorry. Practice ran a little late, my love but I can still come." Nika sat up on the couch as quickly as she could, pressing the phone in between her ear and her shoulder. "You sound hungry, baby. Yeah, no it's okay what do you want?"

Paige audibly gasped as she continued glaring at her friend, earning a pointed look from Nika. "Okay, of course. I will, don't worry baby. I'll be there in like... 20 minutes? Yeah, okay. I love you more, princess. Bye,"

Nika hung up the phone with a smile, her attention fully back on Paige, who was now looking at her with a mixture of disbelief and annoyance.

"What was that?" Paige asked as she folded her arms on her chest, irritation on her face.

"What was what?" Nika replied with the same tone as Paige's, although there was a amused twinkle in her eyes.

"You were just all sweet and loving on the phone, but you couldn't even get me a glass of water that's like, two feet away from you?" Paige huffed, crossing her arms over her chest.

Nika chuckled, shaking her head. "Sorry, dude. You know I love you, but you're capable of getting your own water. She hasn't had food all day cus she was studying and it's not even that far, like 20 minutes away from here."

"20 minutes?" Paige repeated in disbelief as she shook her head. "You are down bad, my friend."

"I don't care, she's my girlfriend." Nika responded as she put on her slides with a groan, getting up from the couch. Nika stretched her arms above her head, feeling the stiffness in her muscles protest. "Besides, it's not like I have a habit of ignoring my friends for her. You know that."

Paige chuckled, her annoyance melting away as she stood up, too. "Yeah, yeah, I know. I'm just messing with you. Go, be with your princess."

"I hate you, you know that?" Nika glared at her as Paige put up her hands in mock defense.

"You did that one to yourself, buddy I heard you call her that." Paige laughed as she watched Nika put on her backpack. "Wait until I tell everyone you call Y/N princess, they'll never look at you the same.

"Yeah and then I'll tell them about the time you called that girl-"

"Hey! Hey, that's different." Paige interrupted, her cheeks flushing slightly as she waved her hands frantically.

Nika chuckled, shaking her head. "Alright, alright, I won't spill your secrets. But you better not spill mine either."

"Deal," Paige said, holding out her fist for a bump. Nika bumped it with a smile before slinging her backpack over her shoulder.

"See you tomorrow, P," Nika said, heading towards the door.

"Yep, see ya," Paige replied, waving as Nika left the room.

↳ make sure to check out my navigation or masterlist if you enjoyed! any interaction is greatly appreciated !

↳ thank you for reading all the way through, as always ♡

[504py]

Scalding-Hot Steel - Knight!Leon Kennedy/Reader

He finally lets you try on his armor.

I'M SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG TO GET OUT!!! 😭😭���😭🙏🙏 i got caught in a bit of a slump, but i hope this can make up for it, and that this was worth the wait!! the chapter after this might be the finale, so i may take even longer to get to it. nonetheless, thank you to everyone who's been reading till now, and thank you all for 600 followers!!!

Historical inaccuracies, I suck at old-timey speak, reader referred to as "my lady" but no other gendered terms or descriptors besides that, no use of Y/N, Leon is a total puppy, mutual pining.

1, 2, 3

𓈒⠀𓂃⠀⠀˖⠀𓇬⠀˖⠀⠀𓂃⠀𓈒

You're unsure what it was, but following that interaction at the library, you and Leon have grown closer.

This upgrade in your relationship has made you be able to relax more in his presence, now that you see him as more friend than foe. Well, to call him a foe was a gargantuan exaggeration, but you did find him intimidating. You still do sometimes.

Even if you've backed off and retired your old obsessive habit of being way too observant about every single little detail about Leon, you can't help but still notice how it seems like your roles have been swapped.

Leon has begun to follow you around like a dog, to put it simply.

You swear it's not just you fixating on him, you really have started seeing him around much more often. He's started waiting by your door to greet you a good morning with a small smile, before heading to the courtyard. During lunchtime, he's begun to engage in smalltalk with you, talking about mundane things like the weather, or your schedule for the day. He's especially chatty if he learns he's going to be part of it. At night, when his usual routine would be to simply see you off at your bedroom door and say goodnight, now he sits by your bedside and talks about anything 'till it lulls you to sleep. He'd be mortified if you knew how long he stayed after you've dozed off.

Leon has begun studying you, in return. He likes to think that he's observant, but that usually only applies to combat, or if he's been trained beforehand on the matter. With people, he's never really had much luck reading them, unless it's too obvious for it to even be called "observing."

Leon admires that about you, how keen your eyes always are. He wonders if you're as drawn into his quirks as he is with yours. If you were, he envies your ability to drink in information so tactfully. If the devil were in the details– in your details, Leon would love to become a sinner.

His attempts in learning more about you were painfully amateurish. Even if Leon were a great tutor, a great protector, a great fighter, he tends to be terrible at holding conversation.

"My lady–"

"I told you to stop calling me that." You sigh and roll your eyes playfully.

"Sorry." He huffs your name bashfully, drawing closer towards you. You look up at him, and he drinks in the sight before you're squinting slightly at the rays of sun attacking you from behind his head.

"Please step into the shade, milady." He insists, holding his hand out for you to place yours on, before leading you underneath a large tree.

"There you are again, Sir Leon." You laugh, resting your back against the smooth bark of the tree.

"Hey, I asked you to forgo the titles as well." He muses, noticing you were still straining your eyes slightly, so he steps in front of the sun. It makes your face relax, and once again, he realizes keeping you happy and protecting you brings him fulfillment like no other.

"Just doing the same as you are, Sir Leon, since you won't drop mine." Chuckling, you sit down on the plush grass and wait for him to follow.

He smiles and breathes out a laugh, setting down the picnic basket in front of you. Leon wants to sit beside you, but then his back wouldn't be there to shield you from the sun. He sits where he is.

"Alright, I'm sorry." He says, almost jokingly. Saying your name out loud makes him feel shy, like saying the name of a god. It feels almost forbidden to be molded by his tongue, but you always invite him to say it, and the intimacy makes his heart race every single time he dares to. He mumbles it quietly again, getting a high from it.

You look beautiful. He thought that from the day he first met you, but the closer you two have gotten, the more and more he finds himself thinking that, and even more does it make his heart ache in his chest. In the shade under this tree, windy summer day illuminating the soft curves of your face so enchantingly, Leon can't help but look like a bit of an idiot drinking the sight in.

"Are you feeling hot?"

His eyes look at your lips first, ears registering your voice second. He closes his mouth, realizing it's been hanging slightly agape.

"I, uh, no– no, I'm feeling alright, my–"

You tilt your head down, and send him a playful warning glare. He stops in his tracks and looks down for a second, smiling breathily.

"I'm alright."

"Really? Your head tilts to the right this time, and Leon's heart skips a beat at how adorable he finds the gesture. "That armor you're wearing looks pretty hot. Can't you take it off?"

"It's only chainmail." He reassures, taking off his helmet and combing a hand through his flattened hair, "The helmet is a little troublesome, though."

You chirp, "I can imagine." before you open up the picnic basket in front of you and start rummaging through it.

Leon watches you munch on some biscuits for a bit, before his eyes flit back to the helmet by his side. "...Some time ago, you said you had wanted to try on my armor."

He says this mid-chew, so you hurry to get your food down so you can respond, "Oh, you remembered?" You wipe away a few crumbs from your lip, Leon finds the act charming, and it makes him smile softly. You continue, "Mm, yes, I did. Why bring it up?"

"Well," Leon holds up his helmet, "Would you like to try it on now?"

The way your eyes light up can't help but force a boyish, giddy grin on Leon's face. It feels strange and his cheeks feel weird, he can't really remember the last time he's smiled this hard. It does scare him a little, how foreign it is, but the feeling is so, so welcomed.

"Of course! Are you joking?" You put the snacks in your hands away, and move the basket to the side so you can inch closer to Leon. The feeling of your legs touching make butterflies take flight in his stomach.

"I-I'm not– I–" He's sputtering and he finds his brain struggling to function at being so flustered.

"Calm down, Leon." You laugh heartily. He wonders if you know the effect you have on him, but with how darn observant you are, he's sure that you're well aware what you do to him. It makes his cheeks burn red and glare at you with a kittenish frown. He wishes he could be more suave about his feelings towards you.

"I will once you stop making me so flustered." Leon huffs, hoping that wasn't too bold of a thing to say. His cheeks burn deeper. His eyebrows lower at your surprised look.

"Do I now?"

"W-Well– See, you're doing it again!" Leon groans, letting go of his helmet to hide his flushed face in his broad hands and whine. His ears turn red at the sound of your hearty laugh.

"Well, it's only fair that I do it to you too."

"Too?"

Your face warms, realizing what you've revealed. Leon grins, elated at the mere implication that he makes you feel the same way.

"Y-You've noticed, haven't you? In the library, you asked why I felt so uncomfortable around you."

"You didn't exactly answer... I thought it was because you disliked me."

"...Now you know that I clearly don't. We get along rather well, don't we?"

He's beaming at you, and it's not just the sun shining on him, it looks like he's literally glowing with serenity and love.

"We do, my lady."

"Leon!" You interject him calling you by your formal title.

He can't seem to let the title go, because in his mind, it's more of a pet name than a title. A term of endearment. Leon clings to the "my" part of the title, he liked the tiniest hint that you could be his. My lady, my lover, my sweetheart, mine.

Leon giggles, and he pauses for a moment after, realizing he can't remember the last time he's let out such a noise. He gazes upon you in awe, amazed at how you were able to bring out this side of him.

"What is it?"

Leon blinks, getting drawn out of his haze and shaking his head dismissively. He keeps his soft gaze on you, though.

The pads of his fingers rest on his helmet, feeling the ridges of it. Maybe it was too rough for someone he deemed as delicate as you. His eyes lower and rest on the piece of armor, noting how it's covered in scratches and dents, how it isn't so shiny as he'd like for it to be. It washed over him like a small wave of shame, thinking it not worthy for someone of your standing to don. Not even socially, but the standing that you held within his mind and his heart. Leon never thought he'd be insecure over such a trivial thing.

"So... Can I try it on, my good Sir?"

Leon lets out a little snort at what you call him, freezing and making an embarrassed face at the undignified noise, but then he he sees how happy it makes you– perhaps how happy he himself makes you, and he feels at ease.

"Yes, of course, Your Royal Highness."

You playfully slap his bicep at the absurd title. "I am not royalty!"

"You are to me." He mutters as he adjusts his sitting position, and you can hear the smile in his voice.

He's kneeling in front of you, being mindful of your hair or anything on your clothing the helmet could snag on, gently lowering it before the hard metal rests on the top of your skull.

Leon sits back down, and can't help a cheesy, tight-lipped smile when he sees how awkwardly it fits you. It's crooked, and it simply is too rugged in contrast to your usual attire and demeanor.

"...How is it?"

"Wow, I can barely see. This is amazing!" Your hands rest on the sides of the helmet to try and stabilize it, yet it still tips over off balance after adjusting. Leon lets out a snort, and this time, he's only half-embarrassed.

"How do you fight in this? I can't see anything."

Leon wordlessly pulls the visor up. His heart pounds at the sight of your flushed face and messy hair.

"Ohh. What if an arrow lands in my face, though?"

"I can assure you, you won't be getting into that sort of situation anytime soon."

"You seem very sure of yourself, Leon."

"Of course, it's my duty to protect you."

"...Do you enjoy it?"

"What? Protecting you?"

You nod, "Yes."

"I look forward to it every day."

The two of you share a wide smile, beaming at the intimacy of this interaction, and you two have never felt closer. I want to kiss you, is all Leon can think about.

Right as he was mindlessly leaning in, you let out a small laugh for whatever reason, and Leon is forever grateful that you do, because it snaps him out of his trance, and he feels so stupid for trying to make a move on you.

"That's good. I don't think armor suits me very much anyways." You clumsily take his helmet off of your head, and rest it by your hip.

"I'm glad to have you protecting me, Leon. I'm so happy to have you by my side every day, not even as a knight, but as a companion." You say this so demurely, looking down at your lap with a cherubic expression on your face that has his heart pounding in his strong chest.

Then, you just had to look up at him, and meet his lovestruck stare, and maybe he's gone crazy from how flustered he's been all day, but he swears he can see the same look in your eyes.

Leon throws out whatever he was last thinking straight out the window, encases your wrists in his hands, and kisses you.

𓈒⠀𓂃⠀⠀˖⠀𓇬⠀˖⠀⠀𓂃⠀𓈒

[starillusion13]

Poisoned Love

Pairing: bff! Renjun x f!reader x bff! Haechan

W.C: 10.5k

Genre: Yandere, Friends to lovers, SMUT

Warnings: Pervert! Hyuckren, Dom! Haechan, Dom! Renjun, manhandling, toxic ex, possessive, restraining acts, obsession, anonymous messages, calls, texts, gifts, threats, crying, scared, privacy invasion, gaslighting(?), pwp (don't do it sillies), oral(f. Rec.), fingering, nipply play, cum as lube, praising, sucking, biting, double-penetration, lots of kissing, anal sex, finger sucking, multiple sex scene, forgot to add anything? maybe

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY LOVE @renjunnnaaa

Network: @kvanity-main

MINORS DONT INTERACT UNDER THE POST 🔞

"I told you not to put those choco chips now. Those were supposed to be the last step." The older boy grumbled and placed the bottles on the countertop, before glaring at the younger one who started laughing all of a sudden.

"you think I have put those in the mixture?" the younger one smirked and took away a bottle from the row. The other one cursed him in his head for disturbing him at every step.

The younger leaned against the counter and pulled out his phone with a smile. He seemed too excited about what he was about to do. The older one hit his bicep and glared, "then where is it?"

"in my tummy." He said but didn't glance at the furious boy who was about to kill him with the knife beside him.

He stared at him in disbelief, "seriously?" The younger one nodded and smiled at the small screen in his hand and this made the boy beside him to snatch away his phone and was about to throw it away when they heard their house bell ringing.

It was not like usual but someone was desperately pressing the switch as if they got attacked by someone or being chased by a mad dog. Haechan, who was near the kitchen door, quickly stepped towards the grand living room and then walked towards the door. He didn't hesitate to waste any time to open the door because if the person outside was a possible threat, then the guard must have informed him about it but without any commotion from anyone, he opened the door.

Two arms wrapped around him and someone's face was pressed against his chest. The familiar touch and the soft voice calling out his name, "Haechan...." was enough to make him realize the person who was hugging him. He raised a hand and stroked her hairs while the other hand pulled her inside the door, before locking it behind him.

Renjun was standing in a distance from both of them and when he noticed the figure in his hold, his eyes went wide and quickly stepped forward, "what happened?" he patted her back and caressed her to calm her down because she was too scared of something and clutching the younger male's shirt tightly in her hold.

"y/n...tell me what happened?" Haechan whispered the words, not wanting to raise his voice higher than that volume. You didn't pull apart when he tried to look at your face so he guided you to the sofa and made you sit with him. Renjun stood in front of you with folded hands. When he noticed a maid passing by the stairs, he called her and asked her to prepare the cake from where they had left. She obligingly nodded and went towards the kitchen and his attention was again brought back to you when you spoke up.

Pulling yourself away from Haechan, you took deep breaths and bit your lip. He brushed your hairs back and pulled your face up by your chin and noticed your tear strained cheek and red eyes with red plump lips because of your habit of biting lips in nervousness, "tell me, y/n. Is it the same reason?"

He knew. Both of them knew. Renjun scoffed as soon as you nodded. The way you were scared and nervous, they were more furious. It's getting too much. They can't let you live like this with the same thing repeating without any trace of stop from the other end of causing this mishap.

"Heachan, we need to stop this. She has already been through so much and now..." the younger one nodded at his words and smiled at you while patting your head, "how about you freshen up? You look like a mess. You already have so many things, even a room for yourself so go upstairs. We will be there soon."

Renjun extended his palm for you to grab and you did it. Looking at his face, he was smiling all the way when you stood up and turned towards Haechan and exchanged soft smiling goodbyes, just to leave for your supposed room. Renjun was holding your hand as if you were the fragile doll, well to him you were, his precious angel. He always reminds you that even if your status doesn't match with his and Haechan, you will always be their bestfriend, his angel.

Leaving you inside the room, he jogged to where Haechan was.

Looking around the room, you felt like you were at home. Well, you feel safer here than being at your apartment all alone. They have asked you to move in with them so many times but your common phrase that you don't want to be a burden to them makes them irritated. Well, not really. They appreciate your choices and decisions but not when you are living out there scared of the shit going on in your life recently.

Taking the necessary things from the drawer for a shower and then when you opened the closet, you were surprised. There were a lot of dresses, each of them being your favorites but there were only a few last time. It must be because they bought all of these because of your nearing birthday. You shook your head, chuckled and stepped inside the bathroom.

Meanwhile, the two boys were preparing everything to take along with them to your room. For the dinner, they opt to have it with you in your room and their maids arrange it in the way to their liking.

Renjun didn't allow anyone to enter your room so he took the trays and entered the door. Haechan was carrying other necessary stuff like extra pillows and water bottles.

"Hey! Are you fine?" He greeted you with a warm hug after putting all the stuff on the couch. Renjun placed the tray on the center table and turned towards you two. "So, what should we do now? What about movies?"

You pulled apart from the hug to reply to the standing male beside the table, "um...I don't want to bother you two if you have something to do but......thanks for letting me come here."

"y/n, we have said this before. You are our best-friend and it's natural for you to come here. Even we asked you to stay here to move in but you are the one not listening to us." Renjun stepped towards you before saying those words and cupped your face to plant a kiss on your forehead. "Come on. Hop on the bed."

"Let's have our time, forgetting all those negativities. Just let it be how you are feeling with us." Haechan said and brought a spoonful of cake to your lips.

"I can eat." You chuckled but he shook his head and urged you to open your mouth, "no, tell me how is the cake? I made it for you."

"you knew I was coming?" you were surprised.

Renjun shook his head, "No. we would have sent you the cake as a surprise and I made the batter for the whole process and he had just put it in the microwave without choco chips."

Haechan glared at him when he continued spilling what the younger one was doing since evening. Your laughter filled the room with their giggles while moving from one topic to another.

For a moment, you forgot what was the reason you came knocking at their door.

Their actions were too sweet. Always, they treat you tenderly. As if you are a porcelain doll to them, making you feel like one of the sophisticated items from their household. Skinship is very normal between you three, not in a weird way but hugging, cuddling with each other or kissing the other one for reassurance regarding a thing is common. Mainly, you are the one who receives kisses from both of them a lot. You are the one who kisses when you are joking with them a lot and also, they are missing your funny side when you are so quiet today.

Scooting towards the bed frame, you sit in between them and notice the double toned hair boy to place the tray in front of you. Haechan pulled you to his side when he noticed you zoning out and rubbed your arms, "do you want to talk about it?"

You blinked and turned towards him, "why is he doing this?"

He hummed and nodded to himself, "knew he was crazy for you. You thought of him as the perfect boyfriend but look when you found out his real intention, he is pulling off this shit." He hugged you and kissed the side of your head, "but it's okay. We are here to keep you safe."

"I know. You are here, both of you but what if he does something more? What if he tries to harm both of you." You clutched his wrist which was around your collarbone.

Renjun sat in his place beside you and smiled while patting your legs, "he won't. you know, no one can do anything to us, so stop thinking about that shithead and let's enjoy our time."

Yeah. Why are you still thinking about him? it's just going to make you feel more stressed and then scared to be alone. Well, should you say something that's been bugging your mind since afternoon. You wanted to say this for the last few days but your hesitation and what if... you don't know what to think more but you just want to stay closer to someone who feels like family.

"I want to move in with you here."

>>>><<<<

You once had a family, a nice one but the sudden storm in your life snatched everything from you. Your teenage life and your happiness, everything was gone but these two met you at the park in the colony changed your life. Of course, it was nowhere near your mediocre environment but that day after having your part time job, you were strolling around the streets when you stumbled to the grand exposure to the park with a huge garden. The place belongs to all the luxurious apartments and their wealthy owners.

You were just crying to yourself when a boy extended a handkerchief towards you. "Haechan." That was the only introduction he had with you. When you hesitated and tried to stand up and look away, the one named Renjun pushed you down lightly and held your hands, "hey...what happened?"

Their soothing voices, warm lingering touches and soft smiles made you let your heart out to them. Since that day, you somehow bumped into each other a lot. Them arriving at your café, or pulling up in front of the university in a luxury car. Everything was surprising to you. You didn't want so much attention on you or never wanted to live like a wealthy person but you wanted to stay with people who will be close to you.

Honestly, the apartment where you stay is the one these two helped you to buy so that you don't have to stay in that previous old and rusted area. You were so happy that, with an affordable rent and two friends supporting you was enough to motivate you to move forward. They were literally a blessing in your life and your gloomy days were soon turning into the bright ones.

Not long enough after having those happy days with your two new best friends, comes your school crush, rather your childhood best friend, Wooyoung. The way your eyes went wide when you noticed him standing at your university gate with Bouquet of red roses and him dressed up in a black leather fit. You instantly ran up to him and hugged around his neck whispering, "I missed you, woo."

"I missed you too, baby."

And then you shared your whole life story with each other at a restaurant where he invited you for his success. He finally got his father's business position and now moving to this new city, he got to know about you from a common friend.

The daily meetups and the reunion of the friendship blooms into a new stage of bonding. The kindle of love. He was the first one to approach you with the proposal and to both of your surprises, you accepted it quickly. Why not? He was always the one to care for you, to be there for you and now, to love you. You are more than blessed to have three of them with you in your life.

But, as we know, the happy days don't last long enough. It's been six months you were dating Wooyoung, and once, Renjun suddenly told you that your boyfriend seems a bit unusual to him. you let him be assured that you know your boyfriend for too long and he can't be bad. He just nodded and smiled at you.

It was early in the morning that you woke up, all smiles and in a terribly good mood. You didn't have your university classes to attain so it was not a big deal to spend your day as a lazy one. You were in the middle of making yourself lunch when the doorbell rang. You quickly rinsed your hands and wiped them on your apron before going to open the door.

There was no one but when you were about to close it, there was a gift box and a rose Bouquet with a letter attached to it. You were hesitating to pick it up and noticed your name written on the red card with a silver glittery ink. Closing the door behind you, you placed yourself on the sofa with the gifts.

'Dear y/n,

You seem so happy and lively every day. Is it because of me? I think so. Well, I am sure it must be the reason. Who else is going to keep you happy like me?

Let's not talk about this surprise when we meet. I want to see you blushing while remembering my gifts. You can do this for me, right?

I love you so much.

From unknown (your love)'

"Unknown? Wooyoung is really weird sometimes and I love you too." You kissed the letter before sliding it on the table top and inhaled the sweet smell which was already spreading across your room from the flowers in your hold. Deciding a nice place for them, you picked it up and put it in the vase. The gift box had a ring inside it with one more letter telling you how perfect and beautiful you would look with it.

As he told you, you kept it a secret from him. Every day, you received many gifts from him and never for once, you raised the topic about the gifts.

. .

One day when you were holding hands and returning to your apartment, you suddenly blurted out, "Thank you, Woo."

he was surprised, "for what?"

oh, you almost mentioned the gifts, "for...for everything, Woo. Thank you."

He turned you around to face him and kissed your lips, "Thanks to you too for accepting my love."

Who knew after that day, your life was about to change.

He texted you the next day that he was going for some business programs with his dad to a different country and he won't be able to meet you for how long he doesn't know and even though you were sad, you texted him back with enthusiasm and being a supportive girlfriend, you appreciated his work.

It was afternoon and you knew the timing, his gifts. But he was not there, then?

You opened the door, greeting with a teddy bear and chocolates.

'Sorry, y/n. I know you are missing me but for the compensation. Here, a gift for you.'

You smiled while happily taking the teddy bear to your room.

But later in the day, you got more letters and more flowers and these ones were not the usual ones like other days. Now, everyday your excitement for the gifts were turning into a nightmare. It was about pure obsession.

The letters were all about questions related to why you were wearing the dress to the restaurant, why you are not going to the university or why you are still in your bed and not eating properly. How the hell does he know about this? You were scared and the closest person to share this was your two best friends.

"Are you sure, that's him?" Renjun asked you the question for the third time and exchanged looks with Haechan who was equally stressed like you. They were so annoyed with the fact that someone or rather your boyfriend was invading your privacy. Even when you were throwing away some letters without reading, he dared to threaten you. He even sent pictures of you doing your chores in your apartment.

"Who else would do that? It's clear that he is the one who knows everything about me. He is my boyfriend and it clearly mentions that whatever the person is telling or doing is for the lover. In some he even mentioned himself as my boyfriend and who else will know that he is out of town?"

Haechan patted your back, "it's okay, y/n. calm down for me. we will find a solution to it. We won't allow him to do anything anymore."

"I'm scared...what if he tries to do something more."

"You should break up." You looked up quickly towards Renjun hearing his words. He was staring at you as if he expected your sudden gaze on him. He raised a brow at you and you felt defeated when you didn't know what to reply to him. you should break up then what else is holding you back.

Well, the idea of breaking up was the only option that seemed right when after a few days, you got a call from Wooyoung, "y/n! have you received my gift?"

Gift. The word was so endearing and loving from his mouth but to you it was a curse. You nodded as if he could see you, well all those pictures, then he might see you right? You have searched for the hidden cameras and all with your best friends, but nothing you could find, then how?

"I want words, y/n. don't just nod."

Your eyes went wide and quickly you cut the call and threw it on the bed. How?

He called you again and again but you didn't pick up, you kept staring at the phone.

A message popped up in your phone,

'hey! I didn't mean to scare you. I thought you were nodding because I got the mail it had delivered.'

'I'm sorry, love.'

'Please tell me. Do you like it?'

Didn't mean to scare you......

You stared at the gift box in front of you. Didn't bother to open it but you texted him like usual 'yes' with emojis. He was too happy because of the way his next messages were flooding in your inbox.

.

.

.

It started to feel suffocated and exposed in your own apartment and your two best friends repeatedly inviting you to stay at their place. Yes, you gladly accepted it and started to spend most of the days at their house. Sometimes, having sleepovers and movie nights or you all going together for short trips for half of the day. Renjun showed you his recent paintings dedicated to you. You couldn't really decipher the meanings behind each of his paintings but still you liked it because his hard work behind it was showing.

Haechan learned some new recipes to cook for you and honestly, most of the time, he made a mess of them. Still, the love for you was showing in the work.

These two were actively keeping your mind off from the incidents happening back at your apartment.

Renjun was driving you to your apartment when he offered you again, "why don't you move in with us? It will be safe and easier for you."

"no. I don't want to be a bother. I should talk with him. Why is he doing this with me?  Hope, it can solve the problem." you looked down on your lap.

"and you think he will? Will he leave you after that? He is obsessed with you. His obsessions are clearly showing. A healthy relationship is not like this. when there's still time. Come out of it."

He pulled the car in front of your apartment and you nodded, "I will think about this. Thank you, Jun."

He nodded and patted your head, planting a kiss to the side, "take care and be safe. Call me or Haechan if it's too much."

You exited his car with a smile but your smile soon disappeared when you reached your doorstep. Again, those flowers and letters.

And this time a message popped up in your phone from an unknown id,

'How was the trip, love? Did you enjoy it? Are you missing me?'

You were so scared that you quickly dialed Renjun's number and he was quick enough to reach your location and engulfed you in a hug.

"It's okay. I am here. Don't be scared."

When he asked you for the keys, you shook your head. You didn't want to enter the door and whispered to him to take you somewhere else. And he did. He listened to your pleading, he himself didn't want to leave you there alone. So, he drove you to a cliff where you love the most to spend time talking about your life. This is the place where only three of you come often.

When you reached the place, you were surprised to see Haechan with a white leather jacket and Black jeans standing, leaning against his bike and you exited the car, only to run towards him, "Haechan..."

"Baby...are you okay?" his voice was soothing just like other times. His tone becomes sweeter when he speaks to you. He really treats you like a baby.

And the next day how you ended up at their doorstep, finally having too much of the threats and scared that he might pull up something more crazy.

They blocked his number and shifted all your things from the apartment to their house. Even, they managed to change your university classes to online. Haechan even bought you a new phone with a new number so that you don't have to feel scared of him texting you again.

Was it all over? Or something more crazy was supposed to happen?

>>>><<<<

It's been over six months, you are staying with them in their house, which they make you feel assured to think of yours too. But something, you did notice. Their skinship with you. The tension between you when either of them is too close to you. Why? You have a boyfriend. Well, maybe you had.

Then, what's this they are trying to show you? Trying to make you feel.

You were standing beside Haechan who was beside you cutting vegetables because last night, he decided to learn to make you a new meal which a lover should try to impress their crush.

"So, am I your crush?" you asked him and raised your brow when he blushed and turned away.

He shook his head while washing the knife, "keep quiet. I am doing something important. Don't distract me."

"So, am I your distraction?" you neared him and stepped beside him, leaning against the counter. "Tell me."

He glanced at you before placing the knife to the side and with a quick move, he caged you between his arms, trapping you between the counter and his body.

"Haechan..." you gasped because of his sudden action.

"Ask me the question again." his breath was near you, fanning your lips. His soft voice yet a tone of demanding was enough to make your breaths heavy. You averted your eyes away when he grabbed your jaw, "look at me and ask the question."

His lips were almost touching yours and the only thing that was crossing your mind was to kiss him. Why? You don't know. But you wanted to.

"Kiss me." you whispered the words, your mind going blank and your hands clutching the marble edge of the counter, nails colliding against the slippery surface and you bit your lower lip.

"Fuck, I would've never thought you wanted me in the same way I wanted you," he took your hand and pulled you towards him so your bodies were pressed together more. "So you are attracted to me too?" He whispers low in your ear, making your breath hitch.

"Well, I guess-"

"A direct one word answer is what I want." he cut you off, nibbling on your earlobe. "Are you enjoying this, y/n?"

"Yes," you answered him, finally relaxing in his arms. you held onto his shoulder to prevent yourself from collapsing, your knees feeling weak at his touch. "I love you."

He continued peppering your neck with soft wet kisses, his breaths fanning over it. You tilted your head to allow him more access. You placed a hand on his chest, then began to untuck his black shirt, both hands starting to roam under it.

His lips pulled your lips into a kiss, a soft sensual one. Never in a while, you thought to be like this with him and even going further into it.

At the same time, he was busy moving his hands up and down your sides, still moving his lips with the rhythm of yours. He grunted when your soft hands met his bare skin, his heart beating erratically. Tongues intertwining and hands roaming each other's bodies. You tugged his shirt eagerly and he helped you to take it off before throwing it away, he stopped you when you were pulling your shirt.

He wanted to do it on his own. He wanted to see you on his own.

He separated his mouth for a few seconds so he could take your shirt off. You admired his bare tanned chest and abs, not being able to keep your hands off him. He went to pull your pants off.

"Fuck...you are driving me crazy." He smirked and you were nervously looking at the door to see if anyone would accidentally see you in that position with him."don't worry, no one is at home. Not even Renjun."

Before you could say a word, he again dominated your mouth once again, making your mind go blank. His hands traveled to your ass, squeezing it. You moaned into the kiss, grinding against his still clothed hard-on. "Fuck, you're so hot," he grunted, gripping your ass harder. "He had this all to himself. Lucky bastard."

"I didn't fuck him." You whispered.

"Then am I the first one?" He smirked and held your chin upward. You nodded and shyly looked at him. "Words y/n.." he pecked your lips.

"Yes, Haechan. You are the first one. Please do something."

He lifted you by your thighs and placed you on the counter. You gasped when your lower half came in contact with the cold surface. He crouched down to kiss your belly. Your chest heaved up and down in anticipation as you felt his touch, trailing kisses starting from your ankle and going higher. you began squirming when the soft lingering touch of his lips reached your inner thigh. "Hae-Haechan..." your breathing labored.

He poked his tongue out to trace the edges of your underwear, dangerously close to your heat, but avoided the spot on purpose just to tease you a little longer. He is a tease and he is even proving it to you in this situation.

your hand grabs at his hair, the other gripping the edge of the counter. "please, stop teasing me," you whined, getting more and more frustrated.

He removed your panties with his teeth, staring up at your face, twisted in frustration. "God, I can't get enough of your look. You are perfect, y/n."

Your knuckles start hurting from the tight grip you had on the counter but it's the only thing that's keeping your grip strong because your grip on all other senses has been lost completely. Is it right to do this with your best-friend? But your body betrays you with the excitement building inside. You feel yourself attracted to him but...

You were distracted when you didn't notice that he parted your heated lips and inserted his index finger inside your lips, making you let out a choked up moan. It glided in easily, emitting a squelching sound as wetness surrounds it.

"Haechan, we should stop this. This is not right." you breathed out, sounding almost as if you were in pain.

Haechan, too preoccupied with his task, didn't even acknowledge your plea; he adds a second finger, watching how they get swallowed up by your heat. He began a scissoring motion, feeling your walls pulse around them.

" Fuck, Haechan...that- that's...more please" you cried out when you felt his thumb press on your sensitive clit. you breathe heavily, your skin sticky with sweat, legs shaking and fingers going numb from the grip on the marbled counter-top.

"I will give you more, baby." he kissed your belly and  nuzzled his face, his breath tingling against your hot skin. "Let's have the fun. I will give you everything, I promise."

When he couldn't take the insistent throbbing of his cock anymore, he stood and made quick work of lowering his pants and boxers. you whimpered at the loss of his fingers. He held your thigh with one hand and grabbed his length with the other, rubbing the tip against your wetness. "Tell me how much you want it, baby," he demanded and slid his cock against your clit.

"Want it so bad, need it, Haechan, please fill me up," you panted, swerving your hips.

"I want you too. So bad. My filthy girl. My princess is going to be mine." he unclasped your bra and quickly plopped a nipple in his mouth. You moaned out his name and grabbed his hair, his grunts vibrating against your skin. When he heard your plea to stop again, he chuckled against your chest while still licking and sucking your nipples, "don't fight yourself, princess. You know you want this. I know you want this. He couldn't have given you this like me." he bit your skin near the collarbone, "fuck...he should not have come into our life. I would have gotten you sooner."

your back arched off the countertop when the tip slipped in and he simultaneously groaned in delight. He pushed the rest in slowly, filling you up as promised. He leaned over your body to press his lips to your neck and leave wet kisses.

Both of your hands were buried into his hair, making it messier than it already was. He pulled away and pulled you a little closer to the edge by your thighs. you gasped and grabbed at the edge again to stabilize yourself. He pulled you in for a passionate kiss and he moaned into the kiss feeling you clenching around him. Your tears strained your face and this time, it made him smile because you were not crying because of that shit and his threats but because of him and his sweet tortures on your sensitive parts.

He gave you no warning before he pulled out, only leaving the tip in, and pushing back in.

he grunted, feeling the squeeze of those tight warm walls around him. "Shit," he swore, staring at your figure. His hands went up to squeeze your breasts and fickle your nipples, igniting your senses and making your body react to his touches more.

"You," Haechan praised, pushing in, "are...so...sexy" Each word was punctured with a powerful thrust, knocking the breath out of you beneath him.

His movements gradually started to get faster, his hands gripping your hips. He slowed down to put your legs over his shoulders and held on to your thighs instead, thrusting harder, reaching deep inside your warmth. "Haechan!" you clawed at his back, letting out lewd moans that mix with the sound of skin slapping on skin. he pecked your lips and smirked.

"Ah- Yeah, baby, scream my name! Let me hear you who's fucking you this good," He said in between thrusts.

"Haechan, yes, fuck me!" you repeated his name insistently, overcome with ecstasy.

he rolled his hips, grunting in pleasure each time. His tongue glided across his lower lip as he watched you with hooded eyes. Haechan moaned when your walls clamped down on his cock, pulsing around him, tightening and squeezing."Fuck!"

"y/n, so, so good, you are doing so good I'm so close, fuck!" your vision went white as you hit your high, body spasming with aftershocks and toes curling while your hips keep moving against his.

your orgasm along with your blissful facial expression triggered his own, causing him to release hot, sticky spurts of cum. He pulls out and jerks off over you, more coming out to paint your lower stomach.

he pressed an affectionate kiss on your leg that was still over his shoulder. "God, that was awesome," he breathed, running a hand through his sweaty black hair.

He helped you sit up comfortably before pulling you in for a heated kiss, your arms going around his broad shoulders. you sighed in satisfaction, softly dragging your nails down his naked back.

He bit your bottom lip in return, hands roaming your thighs. "Good?" Haechan asked you after pulling away. you nod in agreement, "all good."

He pulled his pants back up and stepped back to collect your disposed dress. He carefully dressed you back in your clothes, leaving the inner wears still on the floor. You didn't bother to wear it as you were going to shower anyways.

He kissed your cheek and you blushed, "I can't believe we just did that on my kitchen counter..." you hid your face in the crook of his neck. "but..I...it feels so wrong."

"Why?" He hugged your body and kissed your head. You murmured against his bare skin, "we are best friends and this feels so wrong...we are not even dating..."

"Will you let me be your boyfriend?" he pulled back to look at your face. Your surprised expression earned a chuckle and a kiss on your tip of the nose from him. You asked him softly, "are you serious?"

He nodded and pressed his forehead to yours, "yes. I am. Will you?"

"Y-yes. I can try."

He pressed his lips to you and whispered, "I promise I will treat you better than him. I love you."

."I love you too, Haechan."

.

.

The sun shone brightly on the two figures lying comfortably in bed. Haechan blinked his eyes open and stretched, accidentally waking you up. you gently placed your hand on his cheek, caressing it slowly. You were still in disbelief after the last event.

"Good morning," he greeted in a gruff sleepy voice. The sound of his low voice made your cheeks heat up slightly as you smiled back at him with a greet. you both giggled and cuddled closer; your activities from the last evening had you both glowing in happiness and excitement.

"Sleep well, baby?" Haechan, stroking your hair. "hm, best sleep I've had in a while." you offered a small smile but he frowned. "What do you mean 'in a while'? Have you not been sleeping well?" He asked, concerned.

"It's not that... I just slept better since you were next to me," you buried your face in his chest in order to hide your embarrassment.

.

.

.

Well that was not the end, even though you started dating Haechan. You could see Renjun was in a bit of a sour mood recently. Snapping at Haechan every now and then and sometimes, he even glares at you for no reason.

"Y/n...are you busy?" Renjun was standing at your doorstep, you plugged out your earphones and sat up properly and patted the place beside you. You shook your head and smiled, "no. I'm just chilling. Haechan said he will be coming home late. Why, do you need something?"

He stepped forward and locked the door behind him. Your eyes went wide in surprise, "Renjun?"

He chuckled and noticed a photo frame on a shelf beside him, you and Haechan smiling brightly at the camera. He himself clicked that picture for you two. He had also clicked a picture with you but why not he is there as well? Oh, beside it there is another picture but all three of you smiling, you in between staring at the camera and them staring at you.

"How are you and Haechan doing?" His slow steps made your heart beat fast. Your breath heaving with his low voice and chuckles in between his questions. You gulped and scooted towards the bed frame.

You managed to smile, "we are fine."

He placed himself beside you and scanned your body, in shorts and a short tee. You are really a tease. He thought to himself and his gaze darkened with the thought that you are dating his step-brother. You tried to move away from him when he held your wrist and pulled you in front, "where are you going?"

"no..I'm not going anywhere."

"Am I not good for you?" his dark voice and the tight grip on your wrist didn't let you avert your eyes away. He curled a lock of yours between his fingers and traced your face, "speak...angel. I know you can use your words." he kissed the tip of your nose and smiled.

"Yes, you are good." you breathed out the words. He pulled your ankles and wrist together towards him, a slow tug upwards made you sit on his thigh. Your legs folded by your knees and resting on either side of his leg.

"You know, haechan is not the only one who loves you in the way you are attracted to him." he leaned and whispered in your ears, "you don't know how bad I want you angel. I want to ruin the innocence of you." his breath tickling your earlobe and his teeth grazing over your back of the ears, where he pressed a kiss and trails down wet and sloppy kiss downwards to your neck and throat.

"R-Renjun...stop.."

He darkly chuckled in your ears and pulled apart to stare at your scared face, the look he is used to seeing because of the past incident of your obsessive boyfriend. He grabbed your wrist to bring your hand to his chest and leaned forward, "you didn't tell him to stop. And, look, do you feel the heart? That's beating for you my love."

"What do you mean?"

"I love you, y/n...please...I love you so much."

he pulled down the straps of your red tee, slipping them off your shoulders, unclipping the bra with one swift click and kissing the skin there. He moved lower to nip at your collarbones and you curled your hands above his chest, arching forward. He helped you slip your arms out, then proceeded to pull the fabric low enough along with your bra to expose your breasts. His head descended down to take a nipple into his mouth, making it harden as he swirled his tongue around it, gently toying with the other between two fingers. you squirmed, your chest rising and falling with every breath you took.

"Renjun, please..."

"It doesn't take much to have you begging, huh?" He teases, making you whine in response, "I'll have you begging even more in a minute, love."

Renjun kissed his way down your stomach, using his hands to pull down your shorts to reveal your panties. He pushed your knees apart, causing you to gasp in surprise. He pushed you down on the bed, your head hitting softly against the mattress. He traced his lips at the edge of your underwear, staring up at you with desire in his eyes; your reactions will never cease to entrance him. Them.

Your hands tightened in his hair, tugging at it softly as Renjun continued to tease you, softly nibbling at your thighs near the edges of your panties. he hooked his fingers through it and pulled it down your legs, taking it off and dropping it to the floor, leaving you bare apart for the tee bunched up at your waist.

your hands slipped out of his hair as Renjun scooted further down the bed, placing your legs over his shoulders. He kissed your inner thighs, tracing his tongue along your sweet skin before going even lower. you let out a loud gasp and your fingers twisted into the sheets when he licked at your heat. legs trembling with every contact of his tongue made with your clit. He held tightly onto your thighs, pressing his pointed tongue against your swollen clit in a teasing manner and flicking the little bud.

You were practically crying when Renjun pressed his tongue inside of you, slightly parting your walls. He looked up, seeing your face twisted in pleasure, panting and moaning as he thrusted his tongue inside your heat. He used one of his hands to rub your clit with his thumb and you whined loudly, trying to push your hips back against him.

"I want to cum," you stutter out, thrashing your head from side to side.

Renjun stopped all his movements to look up at you, "What's the magic word, baby?"

"Please," you begged, your hands pushing his head down. you couldn't take it anymore. you were so fucking close to the edge, you barely needed a push to reach your peak.

"You are so perfect, y/n."

He chuckled before diving back down to accomplish his task: he slurped and licked vigorously, swirling his tongue and flicking your most sensitive nerve. He pinned your hips to the bed to keep you from moving too much as he worked closer to orgasm. Renjun knew you wanted to cum before it even happened: the legs on his shoulders tighten around him and shake with the force of your climax, sending you crashing down.you pulled hard at his duo toned hair.

Soon after, your body turns slack, as if melted into a puddle. He kissed your inner thigh then your belly button and continued all the way up to your chest. He didn't waste any time removing the pant, throwing it to the side, he slowly pulled up his shirt above his head and your eyes locked at his chest, Renjun softly nips at the soft and supple skin of your neck, tasting the sweetness of it, inhaling the scent.

your hands held onto his broad shoulders and your nails dragged down his back when he finally pushed inside you, burying himself in your tight heat. He rolled his hips gently, enjoying the burning pleasure you brought to him.

"Y/n." He moaned in a low voice. you held onto him tighter, pushing back against him, trying to meet his gentle movements.

Renjun's hands roamed your body, caressing every curve of your form, leaving goosebumps in their wake. your breathing was erratic, heartbeat beating fast and loud in your own ears.

you could barely handle the way he was holding you close and making those erotic sounds right next to your ear. sweat slick bodies move in harmony, pushing and pulling, biting and scratching, lost in a flame of passion.

Renjun nipped softly at your throat then at your chin and finally your lips. He rubs your noses together affectionately and giggle at the sweet gesture.

No words were exchanged as you stared into each other's eyes, in the middle of your own little world, the only important thing being one another.

Renjun lowered your legs to around his waist and accelerated the cadence of his movements, already sensing you were close by the way you were gripping him even tighter.

The rhythm turned sloppy as you both chased pleasure, rocking against each other, holding on before finally letting go, flying high before spiraling down together and drowning in pure bliss. The heavy breathing fills the otherwise silent room and sweet kisses were exchanged along with soft touches.

Renjun hid his flushed face in the crook of your neck, breathing in your scent and letting his body relax but not resting his weight on you. He couldn't get his heart to slow down; the proximity and your delicate touch were almost too much for him to handle.

"Angel," he called breathlessly, snuggling into you underneath him, "I love you," he finally said. Laying on his side, he traced your face with his index finger, from your closed eyelids to your cheek to the bridge of your nose, admiring every detail of your angelic face.

The only response he got was your soft breathing.

Renjun smiled to himself, closing his eyes and drifting into a deep sleep beside you, holding onto you tightly in his embrace.

>>>><<<<

"I'm sorry, Haechan." you were practically crying while hugging the boy in front of you and no matter how many times he did ask you about the reason, you were just clinging onto him and crying because of what you did last night.

He pulled you on his lap and rocked you in his embrace, "shh...baby tell me, what happened?" he kissed your head, "did he contact you again?" you shook your head and buried your head into his chest. "Then is it about, Renjun?"

You quickly looked up to him. Does he know what you did last night? He really answered your question as if he could read your mind.

"I know what happened yesterday." he combed your hair back and traced the purple and red marks on your skin around the neck and the exposed body parts. "If you are thinking, I'm angry with you. No, I'm not."

"Haechan?"

He smiled and pressed his lips to your temple, "I love you, princess. He loves you too. We both know our weakness for you. Because of this, we decided to have you as ours. But we were doubtful about you. How you will react and after yesterday. I'm sure you don't have a problem accepting him." he pecked your lips, and whispered into it, "Do you have a problem with this?"

"But this is wrong."

He chuckled and grabbed your neck softly, yanking your head back soft enough not to hurt you, his gaze darkened but quickly vanished with a smile appearing on his face, "you are doing no wrong, baby. This is what you want."

You were staring at his face. His words and his actions were more dominant than other days. As if he was punishing you for your deeds with his brother but also, holding back himself because that's the thing he wanted too. Or rather agreed to.

"I promised you. I would keep you safe and would protect you from everything then, why are you so afraid?" he leaned to your ear and said in a low voice, "Be brave, be strong, but take it easy. No rush baby. I know you got this."

"I love you, Haechan." you murmured and he kissed your earlobe, humming in satisfaction before returning to your lips. " You know I love you so much, right princess?" he pressed his lips to you and pulled your hair back to kiss your throat and left behind sucking on the spots.

You nodded and he asked you softly, "you will let Renjun join now?" you nodded and your mind was going blank under his sweet tortures of his mouth and hands roaming around your body. Your groans when he was pulling your hair earned chuckles from him.

He took his time teasing you, biting and nibbling and licking every sensitive part of your body, teasing you relentlessly until you were a hot whimpering mess.

You heard the door creaked open and noticed Renjun walking in, his eyes filled with lust and hunger for you. His each slow and cautious step made you squirm under Haechan's hold. He reached near the bed and pulled his belt around from the waist and tied your hands together to prevent you from moving them. your hands were by the top of your head.

"Renjun...why?" your voice was not recognisable, whether you were asking or pleading to him. He leaned forward, placing his palm on the mattress and smirked, "I haven't touched you yet but still you are begging."

Haechan pushed your top upwards revealing your body bare underneath. He quickly leaned down to trail wet kisses on your stomach, chest and flicking the nipples with his fingers and swirling the other one with tongue. Most of your body was already littered in little dark marks left by him. you squirmed as he continued his slow tortures, claiming you with love bites.

"I want you to do exactly as I say. Got it?" Haechan said in between kisses, looking at you expectantly afterwards. You nodded and when you tried to bring your hands down, Renjun caught them and glared, "did I tell you to move them?"

You shook your head frantically and whined, "No." Renjun discarded his pants and shirt, only in his boxers placed himself on the other side of you to claim your lips, holding your tied up wrist in place and other hand twirling the hardened nipples.

Haechan sat on his knees and palmed himself over the sweatpants and stared at you both. "Good girl. Now, spread your legs for me."

You did as told, spreading your legs with little resistance. He bit his lip at the sight, getting turned on. "Damn, that's hot," he gets on top of you, pressing himself against you. Your breathing stopped for a split second when both of them were right in front of you.

"You are ours, y/n. No one can take you away from us." Renjun said and kissed your cheek.

Haechan placed a light kiss on your nose, cheek then chin before descending lower.

"Please..." Upon hearing you beg, Haechan wasted no more time before diving into your heat, slipping in one finger and then followed by another. He made sure you were enjoying yourself by watching your facial expressions, grinding against the mattress at the same time to relieve his erection.

Your fingers clenched, twisting and crumpling the sheets when Renjun suddenly intertwined your pinned hands with his, your thighs squeezing around Haechan's hand involuntarily, the pleasure driving you almost wild. your breathing comes out in little gasps and your chest heaves up and down as Renjun continues flicking your most sensitive bud in hard circles, his tongue gliding easily across it. you could feel the familiar fire in the pit of your lower stomach blazing up. Just as it's about to explode, Haechan comes to an abrupt stop.

"Why?" you managed to whine through your heavy breathing.

"I like teasing you, baby. I like seeing you desperate and begging for my touch. Princess, you look so hot tied up like this, under my control. God, I wish you could see yourself from my eyes." you rubbed and squeezed your thighs together to ease the throbbing between the legs.

Haechan's dirty words, Renjun's manhandling, their rough voices and the animalistic looks in their eyes were making you feel things you never felt before. They were going crazy for you. The girl they dreamt of having for themselves was under their watch, their control, squirming and begging for them.

"I could just watch you all day." Renjun said and inhaled your scent from the crook of your neck and Haechan pulled down his boxers and took his erection in his hand, staring at you as he slowly moved his hand along his length.

Renjun continued whispering to you, he was enjoying watching you squirm and beg under his hold, "yes, angel. You are doing so good for us."

"Please, I can't! Make me cum..." you could hear the sound of him jerking off and making you even more desperate; they were free to do whatever they wanted while you had to take whatever they gave you.

"Aww, is my baby getting impatient?" The male above you smirked as he sees this and intentionally lets out loud groans, "Fuck..." He could hear you whining and the face you made looked like you were in pain. Renjun starts thrusting into his tight first, dangerously close to the edge. He bit his lower lip and forced himself to stop.

"Tell him what you want, angel."

"Fuck me. Ruin me, make me cum," you begged. you had never been more desperate in your entire life than in this very moment.

Haechan leaned over your body to leave more hickeys on your neck. "Mmh, baby is so wet for me," he said, running his fingers through your folds. He aligned himself with your heat and rubbed his length on your clit. You trembled at the sensation, trying to get him closer to you by wrapping your legs around his waist.

Haechan held onto your thighs to bring you closer and easily inserted himself inside your heat. You both moaned in unison as he pushed in slowly and dragged his cock back out before pushing back in and repeating. "Fuck."

None of your senses seemed to be working as you continued whining loudly and thrashing your head with your eyes closed, paying no attention to the almost crazed look on their faces.

"Baby, so good. Fuck, You are a poison to my mind. A sweet poison." He pronounced every word with a hard thrust, making it difficult for you to speak; you couldn't focus on anything around you, too overwhelmed by all the different sensations taking over your body. you pulled at the leather belt, nails digging into the palms of Renjun's hands.

The said man cursed in your ear, he quickly held himself up and spread his cum on your chest.

The man above you slowed down to a complete stop, making your eyes shot open. "Stop doing that, damn it!" you yell out in frustration.

you suddenly gasped in surprise when Haechan spanked your asscheek. "I'm in control here so I do as I please. Disrespect me again and I will leave you on the edge." With wide eyes, you nod frantically at the seriousness in his voice. "Answer me."

You swallow hard, flustered, "Yes."

"Behave, y/n." Renjun said beside you and pulled you in a deep kiss, muffling your noises. Haechan slowly starts thrusting again, making you choke on a moan. "God, that feels so good."

"Good. keep making those noises while I fuck you." Haechan didn't waste any time before he resumed thrusting inside at a fast pace, making you let out loud surprised moans. your hips clashed as he pounds into your wet heat, orgasms drawing closer.

" yes" you chant, followed by a series of moans. The noises made him lose control, letting out deep growls as he held onto your thighs for support and rams into you without mercy.

The bed squeaks in time with his rhythm, the sound being accompanied by the labored breathing, moans and grunts. Haechan slowed his pace but went deeper, one hand going to rub your clit to finish you off.

He grinds against you as your walls pulse around him, triggering his own climax. He quickly pulls out and releases his thick load all over your lower belly.

"Mhm, fuck yeah," Haechan leaned forward to kiss you shoulders, sticking his chest to you and nuzzling into the nape of your neck. When you try to speak something, he pulls you in for a kiss. The slow, lazy and affectionate kiss and you smiled in between.

Haechan pulled away from you, leaving your body feeling slightly cold under the touch of his brother, "Lay on the bed and spread those beautiful legs for me," Renjun ordered, licking his lips.

you, as always, followed the orders given to you but not without feeling a little embarrassed; Renjun liked the way you were complying to his orders and he smirked seeing your movements under his control.

As soon as you were lying comfortably on the bed, he went to situate himself between your legs at the foot of the bed and pulled you closer by thighs, kneading them. "Look at me," he continued giving orders, the authority in his voice making you shiver.

you lifted your upper body with the support of Haechan in order to see him, Haechan untied the belt from the wrists and your eyes widened as you watched him lift his middle and ring finger to his mouth, coating them thoroughly in saliva. your chest rises and falls rapidly as you keep watching him, while he just stares back at you with that wild hunger in his eyes, moving his tongue teasingly. He then pushes the two slick digits inside you, easing them into your wet entrance. you gasp and throw your head back into Haechan's chest, unable to control your body's response, and Renjun stops halfway, "Keep watching."

Haechan laughed and his laugh vibrated on your back. He held you down on your place, pinning your body against his chest, his length poking behind your lower back and the pleasure in front was driving you crazy. "She will be gone soon. My baby is loving this." Haechan said and laughed at your weak body in his hold.

Forcing yourself to not succumb to the pleasure Renjun was making you feel, you look at him again, licking your suddenly dry lips. Renjun's eyes flicker downwards to watch his fingers get sucked up all the way to the knuckles, his dick throbbing in want. He starts moving them in and out, scissoring them and stretching the tight walls.

you watch with hooded eyes the way his tongue pokes out from in between his teeth as he concentrates on his task, fingering her expertly.

"I want you to hold it in if you are near. Think you can do that?" you nod with furrowed eyebrows, whimpering in pleasure as his long fingers continue working their magic; they glide easily thanks to how wet you were, aroused by his dominant behavior. Haechan was trailing kisses along your neck and throat, often turning your mouth to kiss your lips.

Once your thighs start squeezing around him and you buck your hips, Renjun knew you were close to the edge. He moved his hand to replace it with his length and started to move a little faster, his warm breath hitting close to your nipples, when he sucked on them afterwards.

His hand left your thigh to go towards his mouth and he sucked on his fingers to taste you, tongue swirling around it before pulling it out and pressing it against your neglected clit. You were so into it that you didn't notice Haechan collected some of your arousal and started spreading it to your hole from the back and when you whined, he pushed himself from behind you. Renjun holding your body close to him and caressing your back. "Shh...that's it. You are doing so good for us."

Haechan groaned and held you still, the other male also stopping a bit to make you adjust, "relax. You are taking us so well. Good, baby." He caressed your sides. He planted a kiss on your shoulder and the other one who was still holding you close, kissed on your crown of the head. They started moving again, each cautiously looking at your expression, alert for your discomfort and they will stop. Haechan grabbed your breasts and squeezed them and Renjun grabbed your hips, you were clutching onto both of them for dear life.

your arms give out simultaneously as your legs begin to shake almost violently, white flashing behind your tightly closed eyelids, a loud and obscene moan leaving your lips. your back arches off the chest behind you as you are brought to the highway to heaven., tears spilling from her eyes and hands gripping him, nails digging into his skin.

"Please!" you cried out, whining loudly afterwards. your body wanted to scoot away and get closer at the same time, torn between the two. you panted in exhaustion and your body relaxes once they had stopped. they placed soft kisses all over your body, pulling out slowly. 

They lay you down between them and Haechan's hands comb through your hair while you stare at the ceiling absentmindedly, catching your breath. He whispered, "Happy birthday, Princess. I love you the most."

Before you could reply to him, Renjun turned your face towards him and kissed your lips, "Happy Birthday, Angel. I love you so much."

You glanced at the clock and it was 12' o clock, your birthday. "Thank you. I love both of you" you smiled sweetly at both of them.

"So, how was that? Feel good?" Haechan asks, a cocky smirk on his face.

"Of course it did... but " you trail off, making Haechan's smile fade into worry, "But?"

"But is it okay for us three to be together?" you asked, your face becoming warmer as you confess.

you had never done anything like this before, so you felt as if you were doing something wrong or must have gone crazy that you were liking all these things

."Don't worry, y/n, we'll be perfect with each other, promise. we'll show you all kinds of things in the future," Renjun reassured, squeezing her thigh, and giving her a sweet kiss before getting up, leaving you with Haechan.

"I'm gonna shower now. Haechan, can you freshen her up?" He asks and you whine, "don't leave me with him. Let's shower together. It's my birthday and you both have to listen to me now."

Before you could complain even more, Renjun scooped you in arms and laughed, "whatever you order, maam." you hit his chest playfully, his laugh becoming louder followed by Haechan who even started teasing you how heavy you look in his arms. Both of you glared at him and entered the bathroom.

You are glad that you are no longer in the past relationship with Wooyoung. You are out of his obsession and listened to your two best friends who stayed by your side, protected you and loved you. You are out of the toxic love. You are in a pure and innocent love.

Are you really, though?

Before Haechan could enter the bathroom, he heard a notification pop up on your phone. He stepped towards the table and unlocked to see it. He smirked at the screen, placing it back on the table top and he jogged towards the bathroom  when Renjun called out his name.

'Happy Birthday, y/n!'

        -Unknown (your love)

Love is poisoned by your innocence.

Note: please I want to thanks to people for reading and reblogging. Reviews are always appreciated. Spread love not hate. If my favoritism is showing with any of the members then please try to understand coz Hyuck is my twin🎀

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[open!]

[finelinevogue]

an absolute nuisance

summary - harry is a nuisance in the morning

pairing - boyfriend!harry x reader

word count - -1k

♾️🩶♾️🩶♾️🩶♾️🩶♾️🩶♾️🩶♾️🩶♾️🩶♾️

“What’s this for?” Harry sat up in bed against the headboard.

The duvet was pushed down onto his lap so his bare torso was showing. There was a little roll or two where his stomach was tucked over from where he was sitting.

“Happy first day of spring!” You smiled cheerily.

You felt happy this morning.

The sun was shining into your bedroom, the sky was cerulean blue and the birds were chirping away.

You handed Harry his mug of peppermint tea, which he religiously had every morning, whilst you enjoyed the classic english breakfast tea. Milk, no sugar.

“Thank you, m’love.” Harry smiled, giving you a moment to kiss him softly before you situated yourself beside him crossed legged.

“Sleep okay?”

You took a sip of your drink even though you knew it would be too hot.

Harry kept his hands around his mug as if it was the middle of winter, more out of habit than necessity.

“Mm, yeah. You?”

“Yeah.”

“I’m going ‘round to Noel’s this afternoon to drop off some tech gear.” Harry told you.

“Okay.” You nodded, “I’ve got work at 2.”

���When do you get off?”

“Should be about 6, but you know what they’re like.” You rolled your eyes.

“If Katherine keeps you for extra hours again, love.. I’m going down there myself to kidnap you.”

You chuckled, “Kidnap me?”

“Yeah. I’ll stage the whole thing. I’m an actor now, you know?” He winked at you, carefully taking a sip of his drink.

“Okay, Mr Hollywood.”

You stayed chatting about everything and nothing whilst you enjoyed your morning teas, before you decided to start getting ready for the day.

“Where you going?” Harry asked, his hand softly stroking small circles into the exposed skin of your thigh.

“Need to get ready.”

You reached over to draw the loose hairs away from his eyes, allowing your hand to brush over his cheek as it moved due his face.

Harry warmed at the feeling, his cheeks glowing in colour as your skin moved across his.

“Don’t go.” He pouted.

You moved from your cross legged position to sitting on your legs in a kneeling position. You leant closer to Harry and cupped both of his cheeks with your hands.

“I’m only going to get ready.” You kissed him. He kissed you.

“Wanna stay in this moment with you forever.” You kissed again.

“And make me late for a shift with Katherine? I don’t think so. If I had a dick, she’d cut it off.”

Your words sent a laugh through Harry, him complaining how sometimes you really did know how to ruin a moment. You took it as a compliment, because sometimes it would a good tactic to have.

“She’ll cut off my tits instead.”

“No!” Harry pretended to be horrified, which sent you into a fit of laughter. You sank you face down into the crook of his neck to hide yourself.

He smelt so good. And how? It was first thing in the morning and he smelt so homely and perfect.

Harry took the moment to his advantage, pushing himself over you and trapping you underneath him. The manoeuvre was too quick for you to even understand the logistics of it.

“Harry!” You sighed with a giggle.

“You have four hours before you need to leave.” He whined. “Stay with meeee.” He buried his face against your neck and left a trail of kisses there, getting close to the spot behind your ear that made you melt.

“But I need to do stuff.”

“Yeah? Like what? Maybe love on your boyfriend?”

“Gonna be just my friend in a moment if you don’t let me go.” You huffed.

Harry’s head perked up at that. “There’s nothing friendly about what you did to me last night.”

“You make it sound like you were helpless…” You giggled.

“I was!”

“Oh give over.”

“You had me completely surrendered.”

“You’re such a nuisance.” You groaned, trying to lift up but he was too heavy for you.

“And yet you love me. Sounds like you’ve got the issues, babe.” He teased you.

“I hate you.”

“I love you too.” He kissed you. Reluctantly, you kissed him too - which only ended up with you staying in bed for another four hours…

[shitsndgiggs]

calling your bf “bro” except it’s with yamal

WHAT’S UP BRO - LAMINE YAMAL

Calling Lamine bro

Lamine Yamal x fem! reader

︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿

It was a lazy afternoon, and the sun was shining brightly through the windows of our apartment. Lamine and I had the day off, so we were just lounging around, enjoying the peace and quiet.

I’d been scrolling through TikTok for a while when I came across a hilarious trend where people prank their significant others by calling them “bro” out of nowhere to see their reaction.

I couldn’t resist. Lamine was always so sweet and affectionate, and I knew his reaction would be priceless.

Grinning to myself, I quickly set up my phone on the counter, making sure it was angled perfectly to capture the entire scene.

I hit record and tried to stifle my giggles as I walked over to the couch where Lamine was sitting.

He was completely relaxed, scrolling through his phone, oblivious to the prank I was about to pull. I casually plopped down beside him, trying to keep a straight face.

“Hey, bro, what are you up to?” I asked, my tone as nonchalant as possible.

Lamine’s head snapped up, his brows furrowing in confusion. “What did you just call me?”

I bit my lip to keep from laughing. “I said, ‘Hey, bro.’ What’s up?”

He blinked at me, completely bewildered. “Bro? Did you just call me ‘bro’?”

“Yeah,” I replied, pretending to be absorbed in my phone. “What’s wrong with that, bro?”

Lamine stared at me, his expression a mix of confusion and mild offense. “I’m not your bro. I’m your boyfriend. Why are you calling me ‘bro’?”

I could see the gears turning in his head as he tried to make sense of what was happening.

His usual confident demeanor was thrown off, and I had to press my lips together to keep from bursting into laughter.

“Come on, bro, don’t be so sensitive,” I teased, leaning over to nudge him with my shoulder.

Lamine’s eyes widened, and he suddenly looked very serious. “Wait, are you mad at me or something? Why are you calling me ‘bro’ like we’re just friends?”

I couldn’t hold it in anymore. I started giggling, and the look on his face only made it worse.

“Okay, what is going on?” he demanded, though I could see a hint of a smile tugging at the corners of his lips. “You’re messing with me, aren’t you?”

I finally burst out laughing, clutching my stomach as I tried to catch my breath. “It’s a TikTok trend, babe! People are pranking their boyfriends by calling them ‘bro’ to see how they react.

Lamine’s serious expression melted into a playful grin, and he shook his head in disbelief. “You’re unbelievable. You really had me thinking I did something wrong!”

I leaned over and wrapped my arms around his neck, still giggling. “You should have seen your face! It was priceless!”

He chuckled, pulling me closer and resting his forehead against mine. “You’re lucky I love you, because if anyone else called me ‘bro,’ I’d have some words for them.”

“Well, I’m glad I’m the only one who gets to do it,” I teased, pecking him on the lips.

Lamine sighed dramatically, but I could see the amusement in his eyes. “You better not make a habit of this, or I’ll start calling you ‘dude’ in public.”

I gasped, feigning shock. “You wouldn’t dare!”

“Try me,” he challenged, his grin widening.

We both burst into laughter, and I leaned back to grab my phone from the counter. “I got the whole thing on camera,” I told him, showing him the recording. “Our fans are going to love this.”

Lamine watched the video with a smirk on his face, shaking his head. “You’re really going to post that, huh?”

“Absolutely,” I said, still giggling. “This is too good not to share.”

He rolled his eyes playfully but didn’t protest. “Fine, but just remember—payback is coming. And when it does, don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

I grinned, already imagining what his revenge might look like. “I’m ready for whatever you’ve got, bro.”

Lamine shot me a look, and we both dissolved into laughter again, the prank officially a success. As I hit “post” on the TikTok, I couldn’t help but feel a warm rush of affection for him.

He was the perfect mix of playful and understanding, and I knew our fans were going to love seeing this side of him as much as I did.

[jamespottersdaisy]

It's nice to have a friend.

Remus Lupin x fem!reader

"No one loves a monster like me."

"I do."

warnings- cursing, the prank (with major changes), angst (?), my writing

13k

author's note:- i wrote this listening to taylor and lana. english is not my first language, so beware <3

"What time do you call this?"

You bit down your lips at Remus's flat tone. He looked up from his book with an expression you couldn't figure to be irritated or nonchalant.

"I'm so sorry, Remus. I got carried away with astrology," you said as you attempted to sit beside him. He quickly put his books on your seat with a loud thud. Fortunately for him, the library was empty.

"Then go and play with your stars."

"What?" you asked, a bit confused. "Aren't we supposed to study together?"

"We were. But you're late," he said, shaking his head.

"I'm only twenty minutes late," you furrowed your brows at his uncharacteristic rudeness.

He was staring at you as you glared back.

"You damaged your brain while studying Transfiguration without me, didn't you?"

You arched a brow uncomfortably, getting ready to talk again, but Remus's face softened and changed into amusement. The next thing you heard was his light laughter.

"Hilarious, prick."

"I'm a funny bloke," he chuckled as he lifted the books to grant you a seat, which you took.

"You're not really, James and Sirius are way funnier."

"Weren't you the one throwing a tantrum over their prank yesterday? You certainly weren't laughing."

"They died my hair to green! And don't act like you had no part in it."

"I only told them green is your favourite colour. Was I wrong?"

You blankly ogled his smirk.

"Green suits you."

"You know what suits you, Remus? Purple. Should I do something about it?"

To your irritation, his smirk widened. You turned your hand into a fist. "Which eye is your favourite?"

"I only have two."

"That's not an answer."

"Is there supposed to be an answer? The two are the same."

"Well then," you threw your fist at his eye, Remus raising his arm to protect himself.

"Did Sirius bribe you to hit me?"

"No, but he did offer me some galleons in exchange for your chocolate this morning."

"That was you?!"

This time it's your turn to smirk.

"Time is of the essence, Remus, we have to study." you opened a book before you, waving off Remus as he grumbled something under his breath.

You started to study together, helping each other occasionally.

It was a habit now; you two would study together every week for at least four evenings.

Remus was frustrated today; you could tell from his bouncing leg and twitching lips. But you didn't point it out; you knew he felt uncomfortable when someone coddled him. It was one of the perks of being best friends for five years.

From the first year of Hogwarts to the sixth year, you learned almost everything about Remus by heart. How he scratched the hairs on the back of his neck when deep in thought, or how he never looked up from his book while reading, even if his friends were trying to converse with him.

In return, he knew exactly what to tell you when you were overwhelmed by the studies or how to make you laugh when you were feeling like crying.

You two had always been there for each other, listening, understanding, and supporting one another through everything. You had stayed in the hospital wing all night for Remus when he broke his arm in the third year, and he had been there for you when you were burning with a fever two years ago.

There were too many incidents like these which you and Remus shared that proved the special bond between you. James, Sirius and Peter were also your friends, but with Remus, it was different; unique.

He had made you feel appreciated and loved, never let you down or never let anyone look down on you. Sometimes James and Sirius would mock you two for this affection, but that would always earn them a smack on the head from Remus.

You knew everything about him, and he knew everything about you.

Well, almost everything.

He didn't know that your affection for him was something more; It had been for quite some time now.

At first, you thought it was an innocent crush because of teenage hormones or something, and it would fade away with time.

But it didn't. You grew out of 'I fancy Remus Lupin' to 'I love Remus Lupin'. Of course, you never confided in anyone about your burning infatuation, keeping it secret, burying it deep inside your heart.

The same secret that was fighting to break free from your heart's walls every time Remus smiled at you.

The same secret that was clawing from its grave to get up and fly, bleeding your heart every time Remus embraced you and called you a friend.

The same secret that prickled your eyes with tears every time you remembered that you weren't the only one keeping secrets.

He was keeping something from you, too.

You had always felt it in his eyes, glancing away when you would ask about a scar on his arm or a cut on his thumb.

The first time you fought on it was when you saw the huge scar on his face in the second year. You had worried so much that you pushed Remus's patience, and he had yelled at you. For twelve years old, it was a big hit in their friendship. You hadn't talked to each other for two weeks. In the end, Remus approached you to apologize and explained how the Marauders' prank had backfired, resulting in his scar. You had cried that day because of how much you had missed your friend. Remus hugged you tight, but you could swear you heard a sniff or two from him as well.

Remus would always say the scars on his body were because of a prank, and you would pretend to believe it.

Until this year.

You may be a Gryffindor, but you weren't stupid. You had noticed how he would disappear every full moon and "get sick." You didn't push him before because you thought maybe he needed time, but his distrust was turning the understanding in you into resentment.

It hadn't been to hard make speculations about the situation, but you wanted him to confide in you.

"Are you asleep with your eyes open?" Remus startled you, pulling your focus back to the present.

"Are you calling me a dolphin?"

"You two have a lot in common," he patted your head with his quill.

"Freakingly cute?"

"Freakingly evil."

You elbowed him but regretted it the moment he grimaced with pain.

"What's wrong?" you asked, albeit you immediately guessed another injury under his brown jumper.

He forced a smile. "You just proved my point."

"I didn't even hit you that hard!"

"You tell yourself that," Remus stood up, nodding simultaneously. "That's enough for today."

"Already? You sure you okay?" you worried a bit, standing up. "It's only been forty minutes."

"For you, lazy lady. I've been here for an hour, remember?"

"Go on, rub it in, or I won't hear the end of it until tomorrow."

You two were walking to the exit now with relaxed paces.

"Yeah, about that. I won't be able to study with you tomorrow."

You inhale a deep breath and huff it out.

Here goes nothing.

"Again?"

"Yes," his voice is rusty now.

"Why?"

"Marauders thing."

Same excuse as the last month.

You didn't say anything, giving him one more chance again.

"That's bollocks, Remus."

Remus simply curved a side of his lips to a tiny smile, almost unnoticeable to anyone. Well, anyone but you.

However, you were too irritated to mellow at his smile.

Only for one day, you didn't see him, and he had a new scar, and what a coincidence that the same day was a full moon.

"You really shouldn't curse."

"What truly happened to your arm?"

"Sirius accidentally cut it," he said for the third time that day.

"Stop lying."

Maybe you were wrong to push him like this, but you didn't care at that moment.

"I'm not lying, Y/N," he said before grabbing both his and your books and pressing them between his left arm and torso. "Let's go, we have class in ten."

When you didn't budge, his smile grew, and he stretched his free hand towards you.

"Come on, move your arse. We'll be late."

"You shouldn't curse," you said firmly, trying to look as angry as you could. You were on your limit and had no intention of backing off this time. "And I'm not coming with you."

"Why is that?" he pulled his outstretched hand back to the pocket of his trousers, wearing a soft expression, which his mocking tone contrasted with.

"You know why."

"I'm afraid I don't know why you are not coming to class."

"I will go to class, just not with you," you scowled at his nonchalance.

He pressed his lips into a thin line.

"And why is that?"

"Because I've decided that I'm not talking to you."

"That's not fair."

"Yes, it is," you snapped, standing before him. You waited a few minutes for something, eyes narrowed. When Remus chuckled at your annoyed expression, you walked past him, hitting him with your shoulder.

Striding to the common room's exit, you ignored Remus's call. Only after leaving his sight, you fathomed that you had left your book with him but shrugged it off. You two always sat next to each other, and Remus was too nice of a friend not to bring it back.

"Hey, angry lady." his playfully soft tone danced in your ear, making your heart flutter in your ribcage.

"Go away."

"We're headed to the same class."

"Go away from me, then."

"I'm carrying your book."

"No one asked you to," you still hadn't spared him a glance but could feel the soft smile on his lips.

"No one needed to. I'm a gentleman."

"My arse."

"What about it?"

Your head snapped in his direction. Remus was smirking at you, acting like you weren't almost about to fight ten minutes ago.

You walked into the classroom from the door Remus held open for you straight to your seat.

"Give me my book back."

"You forgot the magic word, lady," he sat next to you. "You know, the one starting with 'P'."

"Petrificius Totalus?"

"That would also work, but I had something nicer in mind. Try again?"

"Periculum."

"What would you need the flames for?"

"To burn you."

"You're so violent this morning. Hadn't had your morning coffee?"

"Just give the bloody book back."

"Now that I think about it, you've been violent for the last three days."

You groaned when the professor started the lesson.

"Don't be bitter, Y/N," he pleaded, watching you snatch your book back. He hated when you were angry at him. "I already told you the truth."

"That's rubbish, and you know that," you whispered so the professor wouldn't hear you. "We're not twelve anymore."

"You were a lot nicer when you were twelve, though."

"And a lot stupider."

"Aye. You'll hear no argument from me."

You knew he was merely attempting to lighten the mood, but he didn't realise it only made you more furious.

"Why are you keeping a secret from me?" you finally blurted out the question gnawing on your insides.

Remus's smile ebbed. He exhaled sharply before turning away from you.

"I am not keeping anything from you."

"Then you must think I am gullible because that's the only explanation for you repeating the same 'prank injuries' lie over and over again."

"That's not a lie."

"Is there a problem?"

You clenched your jaw when you heard the professor's rough voice.

"No, Professor," Remus shook his head, ending the chatter.

You didn't talk for the rest of the lesson. However, to your frustration, you couldn't help but sneak glances in his direction only to find him doing the same.

The moment the class was dismissed, you immediately got up and left the room. The last half an hour in the boring potion class made you question some things. You were at odds with yourself.

And now, in the middle of the hallway, with your books to your chest, your mind was hosting a party for questions.

Was it really about you? Maybe no.

Did Remus deserve some secrecy? Maybe yes.

Did your infatuation with your best friend get in the way of your judgement? Breaking your heart not because he had a secret he didn't want to share but because he didn't love you back? No, of course not (It did).

But you deserved his trust. At least, that was how you were feeling based on the years of friendship.

Were you wrong? Probably.

"Y/N!"

You took a deep breath and blew it out as you turned to face Remus, who quickened his pace to catch up to you. He's smiling. Again.

"What?"

"You still pissed at me?"

"Yes? No? I don't know, Remus," you shrugged and carried on walking to the Great Hall. "I don't understand why you won't share it with me. Don't you trust me?"

"I do," he drawled, and you waited for him to continue. He hesitated at first but gave up after your determination not to make a sound.

"Listen, it's not something about you. I just don't like sharing it."

"Does James know? Sirius? Peter?" you arched a brow, desperately hoping for him to say no. You watched him he open his mouth and close it without a reply.

Well, that was it.

He didn't want to tell you, and you were supposed to be okay with it.

You nodded, hurt at something you didn't want to voice.

Remus stopped you from your arm, turning you so that you would face him. His hands made their way to your sulked shoulders and caressed them back to your hands to hold them tight, sending shivers through your body.

"When the time is right, I will tell you," he said. You looked up into his brown eyes, forcing yourself not to peek at his lips. You had always loved his eyes, and his lips.

"I promise. Just trust me."

You lowered your head, closing your eyes to the pleading in his words.

"I just don't understand why you don't trust me."

Remus stepped forward, letting your head lay on his chest.

"I told you, dove. This is not about you. Truly."

You knew it too.

You knew the reason you were so angry was not Remus but your love for him.

You knew you were not resenting Remus but your own inability to suppress your feelings.

So you nodded, hugging him back.

"What do you smell?" you asked Remus, trying not to sound too eager or excited. You were hoping he couldn't hear your racing heart and couldn't see your trembling hands.

Remus inclined his head to the potion, taking in the smell the Amortentia was radiating.

One, two, tree...

He frowned, looking lost. He clenched his jaw, blinking fast. Something must be wrong.

Six, seven, eight...

He cleared his throat, locking his eyes with yours.

Twelve, thirteen, fourteen...

Remus straightened his back, curling the side of his lips upwards awkwardly.

"What do you smell?"

You gulp, lips parting and then closing and then parting again. You weren't sure it was the right thing to tell him what you smelled from the love potion.

Parchment, coffee, melting chocolate.

Everything that reminded you of him.

"I asked you first."

You sounded taut, internally having a fight between your heart and your brain over the control of your body, mind, and soul.

You didn't know what you wanted to hear from him exactly, but what you did know was that you were praying for it to be something, anything that would remind him of you.

"It's- it's nice," he simply said.

"Mine, too."

"What is it?" he asked, his voice so low that if you weren't so close to him, you wouldn't hear him from all the chatters in the classroom.

You longed to tell him.

Tell him and get it over with. Put down the weighing affection in your shoulders, your lungs and your heart, even if it meant having it broken.

You looked up at him, biting your lower lip so hard it almost bled.

Remus waited and waited and waited for you.

"It's uhm, it's parchment... and uh,-"

"Mr Lupin, are you two done with your potions?

You quickly put a distance between you and Remus. Professor Slughorn stood by the pot, smelling the potion.

"Ah, you are. Well done, you two."

You refused to turn back to Remus, your eyes examining every student in the classroom as Remus cleaned the desk.

James Potter was grinning at Lily Evans, who, in turn, had an unreadable expression on her face. You hoped Lily had smelled James; it would make your friend foolishly happy.

It was a bit chaotic in the room; happy, angry, sad and confused faces were scattered around. A student had even managed to blow up his potion somehow.

You saw Sirius and wondered what he had smelled, but soon your thoughts took a turn when you noticed Sirius was not alone. He was muttering something to Severus Snape with a devilish grin on his face.

"You guys have another prank coming?" you asked Remus, your eyes not leaving Sirius.

You didn't see Remus flinch and almost drop the knife.

"No? Why?"

"Oh, nothing. Then Sirius must be messing with Snape for his own amusement."

Remus hummed softly.

"I love James and Sirius, but was this really necessary?"

It was cold, and you were freezing, not because you had clothed lightly but because it was seven in the morning and in the middle of winter. Remus, seated next to you, was in no better condition. All because your friends insisted you watch them fly around on a broom.

"Well, he had said we were a great support."

"Do I look like any kind of support at this moment?" your teeth were starting to chatter. You closed your eyes at Remus's chuckle, hoping, wishing and praying that you would never forget its sweet melody.

"You look anything but."

You laughed at his words, totally oblivious, his gaze lingering on your smile.

"When is even this game?"

"In two weeks, that's the only thing Pads and Prongs talk about. Where's your head at?"

"I usually tune them out. They're disturbingly loud."

James screamed loudly at Sirius; you threw an 'I told you so' glance at Remus, who rolled his eyes in return. You liked when he did that.

"Try living in the same dorm room with them."

"Must not be fun since you're carrying the scars of the battle in your body."

"And in my soul," he nodded swiftly several of times. You adored the way his brown locks messed into each other, still looking fluffy. "Are you cold?"

"No, I'm sweating," you snarked, peeking at Remus. Maybe you were wrong because he definitely appeared more decent than you were. He beamed at you, sneaking in closer, his leg brushing yours.

Without further ado, he pulled his arm over your shoulder, tugging you to his chest. Your breath hitched as his scent filled your mind.

You hated how your heart reacted every time you were this close to him; a hand away to hold his hand, a breath away to kiss his lips-

"Better now?"

You pushed the image deep into your mind, heat blossoming in your chest, colouring your cheeks.

"Cheers."

The next you-don't-know-how-many minutes later, the practice was over, and the players were now descending to the ground. Remus hadn't let go of you yet, not that you wanted him to.

You watched as James and Sirius joked around, Peter joining them later on.

"Hey, lovebirds! Come down!" James yelled, his hands around his mouth.

You raised your head to see Remus frowning at them before smiling at you, which you returned shortly as you stepped out of his warm embrace.

"Who's hungry?" James asked as you two also joined them and answered before anyone else could. "I am. Let's eat."

"Evans still won't tell me what she smelled in Amortentia."

"Drop it, mate. If she wanted to tell, she would've," Sirius slapped James's back before stepping into the Great Hall before everyone.

"If you push her, she might get irritated, you know," you reasoned with James, albeit you knew it was in vain.

"With me? Impossible, I'm lovely."

"Not to her, apparently."

"Not everyone has a Moony around to cuddle, Y/N."

Peter snorted and dodged the hit from Remus's hand.

"What? James, that's not even relevant!" you hid the crimson of your checks with feigned annoyance, refusing to glance at Remus.

"It doesn't have to be relevant," he shrugged, grinning ear to ear. You shook your head, grabbed a toast and didn't see Remus arch a brow at James.

"Where's Sirius?" Peter asked, making all of you turn around.

"He was there a minute ago, was he not?" you questioned, aimed mainly at James. If there was only one person you could ask about Sirius, and he would have an answer, he was James.

Obviously, not this time because James simply shrugged.

You were jealous. You had never been jealous over Remus until now.

You knew Lily Evans was his good friend, you liked her too, and you knew Remus would never even think about her in that way.

But still, you couldn't help but feel like you were on the edge of a cliff, waiting for someone to push you every time Lily would put her hand on Remus's hand, grazing the tiny cut lightly with her thumb. Your heart was a target to all sorts of knives when you heard Remus chuckle at Lily's words.

You couldn't help but wonder if she knew Remus's secret.

"Jealousy is not a good look on you, Y/N," Sirius cut your thoughts short.

"I don't know what you're talking about," you dismissed him with a shake of your head, pulling your gaze from Remus to the potion top. "Did you add the Powdered Root of Asphodel?"

Remus had always told you that you were the girl closest to him, and it would always stay like this. But you couldn't get rid of the doubts in your mind you were so certain that were emerging because of your feelings.

"Yes, stir twice clockwise," Sirius started working on Sopophorous bean juice. "I'm talking about Moony."

"What about him?" you bit down your lip and hoped your voice didn't shake when Remus's nickname startled your train of thought. How you loved that nickname...

"Others may be oblivious but don't be ridiculous, I see how you stare at him."

You didn't know how to reply to that claim, so you kept silent but turned your eyes to the long-haired boy. He smiled at you as if an encouragement, which almost crumbled your defences. You were on the verge of giving out.

Would it be bad if there was at last a person to share your feelings with?

"So, is it a monthly 'I fancy him' situation or..?"

"Something more," you finished for him, earning a croon. Here, you had said it with no guarantee that he would keep your secret but with the hope that he would help you carry the burden.

"Am I that transparent?"

"Only when you're jealous, love."

You nodded, smiling a little.

Sirius watched the way you were picking the skin around your nails.

"Hey, stop worrying. I'll tell no one."

Relief had hugged you at that moment, thankful that Sirius took your feelings lightly and didn't make a big deal out of it. Also, happy that you weren't alone anymore in this secret; you had someone capable of understanding.

"Sirius?"

"Mhm?"

"Do you think he'll ever...love me back?"

He sighed, drying his hands. You felt his hands on yours, returning the gesture.

"You know Moony, he doesn't talk about feelings," you laughed bitterly, placing your head on his shoulder. "But he is a plonker if he never returns your feelings, and I'll make sure he gets a new scar if he ever hurts them."

"Thank you, Pads," you melt into his hug as you feel his arms around your waist.

"You smell of strawberries," he took a strand of your hair into his hand, sniffing it. "What shampoo are you using?"

"Stop smelling me like a dog!" you pushed him away, giggling when he gasped in fake hurt. "Focus, we still have to finish that potion."

Sirius carried on with his Sopophorous bean, and you looked around for a sloth brain.

"Did you forget the sloth brain?"

"I thought you were going to get it," Sirius shrugged, looking up. "Moony and Evans have one more. Go and grab from them."

You glanced at the pair, noticing that Remus was already staring at you. He didn't budge when you smiled at him and changed his focus back to Lily.

Red hair, green eyes, dainty freckles and graceful stature. Why did she have to be this beautiful?

You sauntered to their seat, passing near a bunch of students that were requiring the Professor's attention. Remus refused to look up to you when Lily offered you a kind smile.

"Hey, Remus, do you mind sharing an ingredient with me and Sirius?"

"You don't have it?" his tone was not kind, and his eyes were cold.

"I thought he was supposed to take it, but it turns out he thought I would take it," you mumbled real quick, still not fathoming the reason behind his coldness. "So here we are."

"You guys were pretty out of it. How do you even manage to get the job done?"

"We are doing fine," you frown. What was wrong with him?

"Yeah, I saw."

"Are you going to let us borrow the ingredient, or should I ask James and Pete?"

His gaze finally changed into something you couldn't quite name. He turned to Lily, who was trying her best not to pry.

"We won't need the spare," she consented in an instant. Remus dashed to the other side of the desk, clutching the jar and dashing back to you.

"Thank you," you mumbled as you clasped it in your hand. He merely nodded one time before carrying on with whatever he was doing.

You could swear you heard Lily whisper to him, 'What the bloody hell is wrong with you?' before parting, but you ignored it.

You couldn't find Sirius when you were back, so you finished the last steps of the potion on your own. He didn't pop up when the Professor checked the work or when he dismissed the class.

"Why are you pissed at me?"

"Moony is pissed at you?" James hopped in as you made your seat next to Remus, who was busy with his meal.

"Yes–"

"I'm not."

You stared at him in disbelief and bemusement.

"You certainly are. Now tell me why."

When Remus looked at you, a smile inched his lips up though his eyes were still grumpy.

"Where's Sirius?" he asked.

"I-I don't know," your head sought him out, giving out in confusion. "How is he any relevant?"

You ignored James muttering, 'You really do like that word, huh?' as your eyes desperately tried to understand why Remus was being weird. But instead of an appropriate reason, all you got was a shrug.

You shook your head in dissatisfaction and stretched your arm for the pumpkin juice. Seeing your attempts, Remus's hand had already grabbed it and now was pouring the juice for you.

"Thank you," you whispered before clearing your throat. "So, we'll study together in the library again, right? Now that you're not 'angry'?"

Remus shook his head when you drew quotation marks with your fingers in the air.

"Today, yes. Not tomorrow, though."

You quelled the rising anger and heartbreak in your heart. In a trice, you twisted in your seat, facing James.

"What are your plans for tomorrow?"

He was taken aback by your sudden query. By the state of his full mouth and the bread crumbs around his lips, you figured out that he wasn't paying the slightest attention to you and Remus.

"Quidditch practice before breakfast?"

"In the evening, I mean."

"We're supposed to–"

"I wasn't talking to you, Remus."

Remus pursed his lips, cursing himself for not talking to James that morning. James's face crinkled in bafflement.

"I am supposed to finish my star chart with Sirius."

You nodded and glowered back at your best friend. James made a face at Remus behind your back as if asking what was going on.

"You don't take Astrology, Remus."

"I'll study with Lily tomorrow," he said, and you froze.

You were supposed to study together. You and Remus. Together. Like the way it had always been.

He wasn't supposed to study with the prettiest girl in the house. The graceful girl with a delicate smile and silky fire-kissed hair.

You didn't know when or how the familiar burn in your chest surged up, but you recognised what it was. You welcomed the acute sharpness of its thorns and the way it cut through your heart.

"Oi! Why didn't you tell me that? I could've finished the chart earlier and joined you!"

You tuned out James's protest. You wished you could tune out Remus mumbling to him, 'We decided in the potions.' too. But if there was one thing you could never turn a deaf ear to, it was Remus's voice; soft yet stern, melancholic yet hopeful. You wanted to tattoo the tune into your brain the way it was engraved into your heart.

You heard Remus call your name. You hated the way you loved your name from his lips. He had always chanted your name so gently, like an incantation, caressing your soul's most hidden-away parts.

"Yes?"

"I couldn't say no to Lily," he said apologetically.

"Yes, of course," you rose from your seat, offering Remus a smile you hoped covered the hurt behind your eyes. "I understand."

"Where you going?" he attempted to grab you by your wrist, but you were agile. You snatched your wrist away unobtrusively.

"I'm going to look for Sirius."

"Hiya, love," Sirius greeted you at the curtail step of the Grand Staircase. You had looked for him in the castle, but you stumbled on him when you finally gave up and decided to head to the Gryffindor Common Room.

"Where were you? I couldn't find you close to the end of the potions," you asked him, feeling a bit better now that you're out of Remus's company.

He shrugged, denying you the answer.

"You, too, Pads?" you stopped your steps, making Sirius do the same. He looked confused.

"I, too, what?"

"Somehow, I never get an answer to any of my questions these days, and it's bloody frustrating," you blurted out the grudge that had made home in you within a breath.

"Someone's getting ready to throw a strop," his mocking tone brought you to your senses. You pouted, sighing away the anger and resentment building up in your core.

"Don't sulk, love," he said as he dropped a hand on your shoulder, which impeded your movement on the stairs. "If it is any consolation, I have a problem with Snape."

"What problem?"

"You remember our last prank on him, right?" he smiled sheepishly. He continued when you nodded. "Right, so he may or may not have been trying to get back at me for it."

"So you two have been fighting like two little third-years for the last week?"

"Uh-huh," you rolled your eyes when he showed you his ridiculously white teeth. "I'm setting the ground for something big, but can't tell you, so don't ask."

"Fine."

"Your turn."

"It's silly," you cringed at the thought. Everything always made sense in your head until it was time to actually voice them.

"Good. Then we'll have a laugh. Come on, now," Sirius squeezed your arm as reassurance.

"Remus is a liar. Sometimes..." you purposely left out the once-in-a-month fact, "He stands me up, saying it's a Marauders thing-"

You held your hand up to interrupt Sirius, who was about to back up his friend.

"Don't. It is a lie. I know something is going on, and I have speculations, I'm not stupid, Sirius–"

"Never said you were."

"And it's okay, you know? We talked about it, and he told me he needed time, and I didn't argue. But now he tells me he isn't gonna study with me because he promised Lily, and I know it's an excuse because he couldn't use the 'Marauders thing' lie this time–"

"Don't forget to breathe."

"It's just...she's pretty and smart and–"

"In love with Prongs."

"You don't know that."

"No, but she will be, and you don't even need to worry about Evans. She's just a good friend of Moony."

You exhale heavily, begging for your endeavours to suppress the ache in your throat to work.

Yes, she was a good friend of Remus. But you're supposed to be his best friend.

Howbeit, more importantly, what was muddling you was the thought that Lily knew Remus's secret.

"I know, Pads. I just can't help it."

Sirius said the password to your common room and gave you the way first.

"You should talk to him, you know," he said as you threw yourself onto a sofa.

"And tell him that I'm ridiculously jealous because of his friendship with Evans, yeah?"

You smiled at Sirius's laugh. "I pity you, love."

You pitied yourself, too.

You grimaced when you felt the metallic taste of blood. Pulling your teeth from your lips, you pushed them together so the blood on them would dry.

You've been pacing around your dorm room, contemplating whether to get down to the library.

Part of you yearned for Remus's presence, while the other part wanted to avoid him forever, not ready to face and voice your thoughts to him. You knew he never left any quarrel unsolved, never letting you stay upset.

Ultimately, your love for him overwhelmed your resentment, and before you knew it, you grabbed your book and ambled down the stairs.

Your knuckles were white from clutching the book hard when you entered the empty library. The only thing you could think about was if Remus was going to be there.

And he was.

He raised his head from his book the moment you crossed his sight, brown eyes full of different emotions that you couldn't sort.

You chose to ignore how his leg was bouncing and how his hair was way messier than usual.

He softly smiled at you when you sat next to him. You smiled back.

You hoped maybe he would act like everything was alright and you wouldn't have to think about your feelings.

But you inhaled sharply when he didn't.

"We're fighting a lot these days," he said, looking at your fingers rather than your eyes. "I hate it when we fight."

"We didn't fight."

"It may not be a fight, but," he took your hands into his, "I know you're hurt."

When you kept silent, he took this as his cue to go on.

"I'm sorry, dove. I should've known it would hurt your feelings to stand up our evening studies."

"You know well that it is not the matter," you said, pulling your hands back. "Stop acting like you don't."

"I'm going to need you to be more specific."

Dozens of questions raced through your mind, but you only managed to ask the one tearing you apart with jealousy. You pushed to voice that screamed at you, saying 'you're being too blunt' back in its place.

"Does Lily know your secret?"

Remus sighed. He parted his lips and then pushed them back together. You fathomed that he was getting irritated from the twitch of his hand.

"I thought we agreed that you wouldn't bring this up again–"

"Does she?"

"She does."

"You told her."

"She figured it out herself," he arched his brow at you eloquently. You despised the meaning behind that expression. It mocked you, claiming that you were not as bright as another.

"Of course, she did," You turned your side to him and opened the cover of your book. Little did he know you had figured everything, too. Except, you waited for his confiding.

"Alright, that's it," Remus shut the cover back to regain your attention. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

"What?"

"Y/N, you've been picking fights for the last bloody month. And I try, I really, really try to be patient but I don't understand what your problem is."

Your face wrinkled in confusion. 

"Remus, what are you talking about? We were fine until this morning."

Remus held back for a moment, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Maybe. But we're having the exact bloody conversation every once a month, and it's getting on my nerves."

This was the last straw for you. Getting on his nerves? 

You had been patient with him since the day you became friends.

You had been understanding towards him every time he pushed you away when he was upset and pulled you back for support.

You had been gentle with him every time he snapped at you before full moons and every time he broke your heart after full moons.

And you had been loving him for the last five years, first as your friend, then as a boy, despite his flaws, blemishes and imperfections.

And now he couldn't even handle your resentment?

Anger climbed its way to your chest, burning down every wall you've ever built to keep your heart's secrets hidden away.

Words were scattered across your mind, ready for you to use them as your weapon against the pain havocing in your soul.

You couldn't keep anything in anymore.

"You know what's getting on my nerves, Remus? You being a liar–"

"I am a liar?"

"Yes. Yes, you fucking are. You have been lying to me for the last five years, and I've been bloody patient.

You think you're being patient? Well, try being best friends with yourself. Someone who lies to you, keeps secrets from you, but tells you you're his best friend, and then fucking repeats everything again."

"I asked you to give me time!"

"And I did! I've been understanding towards you and acted dumb every time you gave me nonsense excuses like you did today."

Remus shook his head. 

"You're being selfish."

"I am being selfish?" your eyes widened in disbelief. He truly had the gall to call you selfish after five years of his lies, excuses, and your espousing only for his sake.

"It's not always about you, you know. I just wanted to spend some time with Lily tomorrow, it's not an excuse."

You sniggered, awed by the way he could lie so easily.

"How come even Evans knows you better than me?!"

Remus clenched his jaw and rose up to his feet. You knew he was trying his best to keep himself collected, not to take out the anger on you, but you had had enough. You looked up to the veins popping up on his neck from your seat when he raised his voice.

"She figured everything out herself! It's not my fault that you can't do that!"

"So, now I have to try to solve you out by myself? That's not how friendships work, Remus! You're supposed to trust me-"

"No! I don't have to do anything! I've had fucking enough. I don't owe anyone anything, including you. Remus this, Remus that. Everyone has something they want from Remus. Everyone rubs their so-called favours and sacrifices into my face, always demanding something in return-"

"I've never even once harped on anything I did for you! I only wanted you to open up to me-"

"And the only thing I asked from you was patience! Fucking patience!" he dashed at you, grabbing you by the sides. "But here you are, bringing up the same bloody thing every month like a broken record! So yes, you are the most selfish girl I've ever met!"

His words cut through your heart like a sword, the same sword you had placed in his hand.

You looked at his dilated pupils and how they almost swallowed the gentleness of the brown you always loved.

You blinked the tears away that were threatening to invade your vision and swallowed the lump in your throat down.

Patience, he had said. Time, he had said. You were selfish, he had said.

An unfamiliar surge of acrimony washed you down, anger flaming in your chest. Its white flames swallowed your love for the boy whole, echoing his words from nothingness.

You pushed him away as hard as you could. He tottered a few steps back, eyes softening at your raged visage. In a blink, you were up from your seat and closed the distance between you two.

"You want patience? I have been patient when you let everyone in but me. I've been patient when you pushed me away in the second year after learning about your father. When you snapped at me for worrying about you. When you yelled at me because I wanted to touch the scar on your face." 

Remus parted his lips, but you held your hand to stop him from talking. With every sentence, your tone was soaring, the tears were prickling your eyes, and you had let go.

"Don't interrupt me! I'm not done. I gave you time when you got 'sick' every month and didn't let me see you or when you cried in my lap but refused to talk to me later. I gave you time when you didn't speak to me for days because you were angry and when you lied to me every month because you didn't trust me enough!

You want time and patience?!

I have given you my time and patience for the last five years and have been loving you for the past three, Remus! So don't you ever dare to call me selfish!"

You snapped your mouth shut, letting the wave of fury and relief wash over you. Remus's eyes changed into something new, something you had never learned about him.

 Only then did a stronger feeling hit you: dread.

You had confessed your love for him. 

His eyes were heavy with emotion, the crease between the brows still reminding you of his anger, while the benign brown lit up the hope inside your soul.

"You what?" a whisper left his mouth, so low that you wouldn't be able to hear it if it wasn't dead silence in the library.

You didn't repeat yourself. You didn't even reply to him. You simply turned away and dashed out of the library.

xxxxx

When you woke up the next morning, all you could think about was that it was a full moon today.

You didn't think it would be a good idea to see Remus today, but you were worried about him. You wished to know how he was, where he was, and how he would endure this night. Would he have new scars the following day? Or a headache? Did he love you back?

So many questions and not enough answers.

James and Sirius were in the Quidditch practice, probably Remus and Peter as an audience. You had decided not to join them this time, trying to drown the chaos in your mind with homework instead. Or maybe you were too embarrassed to acknowledge Remus. 

Anyhow, one can only tolerate writing an essay to one point.

You slapped your book shut, groaning to yourself when you relived your last memory with Remus. Yesterday was the reason why you hated being angry; you would either cry or lose control of your mouth. And since you had bone both of them in one evening, you were planning on rotting in your room. However, your short span of attention was not helping. With every sentence you managed to put together, Remus's brown eyes would pop up in your mind. 

You glanced at the weather; grey clouds and chilly wind. Who would even want to be outside in this weather?

James (and maybe you).

You shook your head and decided that maybe rotting yourself until everyone would forget about your existence was not a good plan, as it was getting boring. Checking the time, you smiled because the Quidditch practice should be finished by now. Thus, you got up and left your dorm room. If only you could make it out of the common room without being seen by Remus. 

Sauntering down the stairs, you slowed your steps. Before revealing yourself, you checked the common room and saw James and Peter laughing. No Remus or Sirius. You wondered if Remus told them about your love confession. You hoped not.

Stopping into the room, you made your way to them, putting on a genuine smile. You tried to suppress the anxiety rising in your throat and reminded yourself that these boys were your friends.

"Look who's here," James narrowed his eyes at you. "The traitor."

"I missed only one practice, James."

"He and Sirius are way more dramatic today. James almost asked Evans to marry him this morning."

"Seems like a normal morning, Pete," you said, even though you couldn't help but chuckle. "Where's Sirius, though?"

"He went to see his brother. Said he'll be back in ten minutes or something."

You hummed at James, pushing your lips together.

"And Remus?"

"With Evans, I wager."

The familiar burn in your chest resurfaced. 

"I'll go find Sirius. See you guys later."

"You have a death wish, I see?"

You jumped at Sirius's voice. As opposed to what you said to James and Peter, you didn't go looking for Sirius. Instead, you were strolling around the castle yard. You liked how the frigid air sent shivers down your spine, it was refreshing. And you, without a doubt, needed refreshment.

"How'd you know?"

"You're walking around in nothing but your sweater?"

You smiled and shrugged, waiting for him to catch up to you. When he did, he removed his black leather and placed it on your shoulders. You caught the burn on his hand.

"What happened to your hand?"

Sirius glanced at his hand shortly and yanked it back into the pocket of his trousers.

"Ah. Nothing. Snape and I had a little duel just now."

"Sirius, this is getting out of hand. You need to stop."

"Yeah, don't worry. It's going to end tonight."

Your heart dropped. 

"What do you mean?"

He burst into laughter, worrying you more. 

"I'm going to scare the hell out of that prick, he'll never dare touch me again."

You attempted a smile, though you weren't sure it came out smooth.

"What do you mean?"

Sirius turned to you, patting your arm with his fist. "Don't worry about it. Tell me what made you take a walk in such weather."

Now you were both worried and uncomfortable. Embarrassment was burning your ears up, making you wish that the ground would split in two and swallow you whole. However, you decided to bury the worries and awkwardness. You deserved someone listening to you, after all, so you shared everything with him.

After a few gasps and woahs, you quietened while Sirius was contemplating what to say and how to say it.

"You haven't seen him since?"

You shook your head no.

"Well, he was grumpy this morning, but I don't think it's related to you."

Yet, you were certain that it was related to you. 

He was grumpy because he was angry at you. He was grumpy because he didn't return your feelings, and you made him uncomfortable by confessing them. He was grumpy because you just shattered your friendship. Or maybe he was grumpy because it was a full moon.

"I think he hates me now."

Sirius snorted at your declaration. "You're one hell of an overthinker, aren't you?"

When you didn't reply, he pushed you with his side softly, "Hey, come on, it's Moony we're talking about. He can never hate you."

"You can't possibly know that."

"Yes, I can. Remember in the third grade how he literally hated all of us for burning his paper?"

"I mean, he wasn't exactly wrong. We did destroy two weeks' work."

"Exactly. He rained hell upon us for a month. Well, most of us. He didn't touch you, and whenever we would ask him why, he would hit us before saying, 'It would hurt her feelings'."

You smiled at the thought of thirteen years old Remus coddling you.

"I didn't know that."

"You don't know why James changed his wand last year in the middle of the semester, either."

"I thought he broke it."

"Nah, Moony broke it."

Your eyebrows shot up in bewilderment, amusing Sirius. He nodded before resuming to talk.

 "James had a brilliant idea to cast a spell on you that would twist your tongue every time you talked. Remus wanted to waver him from it, but he was stubborn, that bastard. So before he could cast the spell, Remus broke his wand in our dorm and made it look like an accident to James."

Your smile grew wider, your eyes tearing up from intense emotions. Remus always knew about your anxiety, and he had always cared enough to help you through it. Whenever you would fidget with your fingers because you were about to give a big speech, he would put his hand on yours to calm them down. Whenever you would sweat because the professor was criticising you in front of the whole class, he would touch his knee to yours to let you know he was there. Whenever someone would make fun of you, he would be the first one to stand up for you.

"I didn't know he had it in him."

"Oh, he has a lot more in him when you are the matter," Sirius side-hugged you, letting you lean in. "You can ask him if you want."

You frowned, about to ask him what he meant but stopped in your tracks when your eyes sorted Remus from the other side of the yard. He was with Lily. Before you could ask Sirius to return to the castle, he yelled from the top of his lungs to make himself heard.

"Oi! Moony!"

"What are you doing?!" you whisper-shouted at Sirius, who was dragging you to Remus's side. 

"You can't avoid him forever."

As you got closer and closer to his side, your heart picked up the pace. You didn't feel ready to talk to him today. You were sure you wouldn't be ready tomorrow either.

Lily waved at you two when you made it to their side. You noticed the bags under Remus's eyes and his bouncing leg. You refused to lock your gaze, focusing on Lily's glorious smile. Still, you could feel his burning gaze piercing your heart.

You had tuned out their talking, alerting your mind only to Remus's presence. You didn't hear Lily's giggle or Sirius's mocking tone; you didn't even care what they were talking about.

You only cared that Remus was bouncing his leg, snapping his fingers and rubbing his temple.

You longed to put your hand on his leg to calm it down, hold his hand so that he would stop hurting them, and kiss his temple so maybe it would tender the ache.

Your heart was burning up in your chest, clenching in agony. The agony of being so close and yet so far away from him.

Every tune around you was muffled, slave to even a whisper from Remus, but he wasn't making a single sound.

You had lost count of how many heartbeats were beating in your chest, wasting time by beating away from Remus's heart.

Suddenly, they stopped.

"I have to go," said Remus.

His hoarse tone shattered everything into nothing.

He got up from Lily's side and walked back into the castle. You didn't follow him.

You missed his voice.

The weather was dark and still cold. You clung to Sirius's jacket more tightly. He hadn't asked for it back and said he would take it from you tomorrow.

You should return to the common room; it was neither safe nor clever to wander around at night. And you did. You turned around and started striding to the castle, only to flinch when you saw a figure exiting it.

It was hard for you to distinguish the person, so you followed him. You waited for the light of the full moon to reveal the silhouette's identity to you. You bit down your lip when you saw Severus Snape sauntering towards the Whomping Willow.

He must've lost his mind.

Your heart fastened with Severus's every step, dread of what was about to come sending tremors down your body. Your fingers itched in anticipation.

You hid behind a bush and watched him with terror. It was dark at night. It was a full moon. You were near the Whomping Willow.

Why did you even follow Snape?

When he finally crossed the safe proximity, the tree started moving. Your hand covered your mouth, your eyes unable to blink.

You waited for the tree to frantically shake and sway its branches. You waited for it to injure Severus or maybe even kill him.

But it didn't.

The moment it started to move an inch, it stopped. You thought maybe Snape had cast a spell; you could only see his back.

He slowly approached the tree, disappearing into a hole under it.

You rose to your feet and took a few steps towards the tree. You felt uncomfortably vulnerable at that moment, standing out in the open where you could get attacked by every side and wouldn't even be able to prevent it.

What if the tree starts moving when you're near?

Where did Snape go?

Should you even be here?

If there was only one question you knew the answer to, it was the last one.

You wanted to return to the castle and forget about all this in the morning. You truly did. However, you figured that there was no turning back when you heard a howl and a scream coming from the hole.

You jumped back with fear, oblivious to the yelp that left you.

Your first instinct was to run. Run away as fast as you could, without looking back, but something deep in your conscience didn't let you flee.

What if Snape was alone out there, and he needed help?

What if he was injured?

You cursed under your breath and took one more step towards the tree.

Your heart was pounding in your ear, competing with the sound of the howl down on the ground. You convinced yourself that it was the fear that made the howling sound closer than before.

One, two, three.

You exhaled sharply and started running to the hole.

You prayed that the tree wouldn't move.

Your legs made a stop before you could fathom what was happening.

More than one figure emerged from the ground, but your eyes only saw the big, ugly beast. Moonlight was glistening through its thick grey fur, displaying a horrendous sight. The tawny glow in its eyes was impossible to miss, as well as its tall and scrawny bone structure. The snarls from the beast were threatening to change into something more dangerous. 

Snape was screaming. You could swear you heard James, your name or maybe your own scream too.

However, your eyes never left the beast.

You had seen it in the pictures. You knew what it was.

A werewolf.

Remus.

And it was planning to attack Severus.

Your Remus.

You took out your wand, not even once looking away from the beast. Your mind was chasing every charm you've ever chanted, looking for the best one for the situation. 

The beast pounced on Snape with a growl.

Snape slumped into the ground. 

The beast towered over him, ready to attack. 

You aimed your wand at it, screaming the first thing that came to mind. 

"Petrificus Totalus!"

You had diverted the beast's attention, presenting an opportunity for James to save Snape.

"No, Y/N!" 

When James's cry tore your mind from the shock, you understood that you had made a mistake. 

Spells don't work on werewolves.

A gasp left your mouth when the werewolf directed its attention from Severus to you. You didn't see Snape fleeing or James carefully walking to you. All you could see was the icy light in its eyes glaring at you, sending sheer panic down your spine.

You hesitated to make any more sound, no matter how much you wanted to yell James's name for help. 

You didn't know how to fight werewolves, no one had ever taught you that. You didn't want to die, either.

The growl from the beast intensified, sending you enough signals that the inevitable was close. With your every step back, it was taking a step forward. 

No, no, no, no, no, no.

"Y/N RUN!

And you did. 

You ran until your lungs gave out, your legs crippled, and your heart burst.

You ran until your eyes watered from the chilly air, your nose hurt from the sharp breaths, and your ears echoed the beast's growls.

A branch cut just above your cheek, but you didn't stop.

 You ran until you lost control of your mind, giving it up to your body, performing purely under adrenalin.

But the beast ran with you, too. It followed you into the forest, howling and growling, letting you know death was close. Letting you know that the screams drowning in the night were in vain. Letting you know that the tears staining your face were in vain.

Your breaths mingled with your screams, your hair getting into your mouth. Sweat and tears melded into each other, burning up the cut on your face.

Before you could understand what had happened, your body hit the cold ground with a thud. Your eyes clenched shut, taking in pain vibrating through you. You felt the soil staining your face and body. Your weeping turned into a shriek when you felt yourself yanked into the dirt on your stomach.

Your eyes widened with fear when you finally fathomed the claw grabbing your ankle. It dragged you back, hoping to get the claws on your throat, too. Your fingers dug into the earth. You fought to free yourself from the beast. The jagged stones on the ground gashed your forearm. The dirt stung the gash. Your blood glistened under the moonlight. The beast howled. It turned you on your back.

Remus, Remus, Remus.

One last cry left you. The beast raised its claws, towering over you.

Remus.

You closed your eyes. The tears didn't stop.

Moony.

A high-pitched whine soared in the sky. You were sure it didn't come from you. Something hit your hip. You opened your eyes. 

A stag. 

A stag stroke the beast with its horns in the underbelly, tossing it away from you. The stag jumped over you, attacking the werewolf again. Animalistic voices ascended in the middle of the Forbidden Forest.

You crawled behind a large rock and took deep breaths. You knew you had to run. This was your opportunity to flee for your life, but you had exhausted your body. You needed time to recover.

The growls and whines never stopped. They got louder and quieter. Closer and farther. You didn't know.

You raised your head. The Moon was gleaming, casting light your way as if telling you to get going. You couldn't. Not now.

You lowered your head at your hands. They were filthy with dirt, the soil blackening the insides of your nails.Y̶o̶u̶r̶ ̶f̶i̶n̶g̶e̶r̶s̶ ̶d̶u̶g̶ ̶i̶n̶t̶o̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶e̶a̶r̶t̶h̶. You moved your left arm, checking the backside of your forearm. T̶h̶e̶ ̶j̶a̶g̶g̶e̶d̶ ̶s̶t̶o̶n̶e̶s̶ ̶o̶n̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶g̶r̶o̶u̶n̶d̶ ̶g̶a̶s̶h̶e̶d̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶r̶ ̶f̶o̶r̶e̶a̶r̶m̶. You winced at the scar and the fresh blood around it. Y̶o̶u̶r̶ ̶b̶l̶o̶o̶d̶ ̶g̶l̶i̶s̶t̶e̶n̶e̶d̶ ̶u̶n̶d̶e̶r̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶m̶o̶o̶n̶l̶i̶g̶h̶t̶.̶

Without warning, a sob left put your mouth, startling you. You pressed your uninjured hand on your lips, listening around. The voices had stopped. Neither the stag nor the beast was there. You were safe.

Your hands didn't leave your mouth, so terrified that if they did, you would make a noise and lure in the beast again. You knew your body was reacting to the shock and exhaustion, but you despised the tears flooding from your eyes. You needed to get it together and leave the Dark Forest. Albeit the beast was gone, the forest was still dangerous. 

You stood up with a groan, not lowering your wand for protection. Your clothes were spoiled, and you were hurting. You looked around to find a familiar way back to the castle.

"Y/N!"

You aimed your wand at the voice, your heart retaking the pace. The voice was familiar, but you were not in the right mind to identify it.

"It's me, hey. Lower your wand," James's gentle voice weakened your muscles, your hand shaking and breath hitching. Relief surged you from head to toe.

You didn't remember when you dropped your wand into the ground and threw yourself into James's warm embrace. You only remembered how he soothed you as you sobbed with exhaustion.

"You alright?" he put a hand on your shoulder and the other on your wrist to check you out after you pulled away from the hug. You nodded, feeling his gaze on your injured arm.

"Where were you?" You didn't recognise your own tone, rasp and brittle.

"Here. With you."

Something hit you in the gut. A realisation twinkled in your mind, finally comprehending the depth of 'Prongs'.

"You were the stag."

He smiled at you. "I knew you were a bright witch."

James Potter being an animagi wasn't the first priority for you tonight. 

"What happened to..." you couldn't let out the rest of the sentence. The beast. R̶e̶m̶u̶s̶

"I led it back to the Whomping Willow."

The next moments passed with silence, you two walking together to the castle and James subtly keeping his hand behind your back to make sure you were fine. You relived everything from the beginning, this time making sense of the incidents. You had so many questions and even more feelings gushing in you.

"I don't understand, James."

"Hmh?"

"Why was Snape there? Where were Sirius and Peter?"

You heard James clear his throat. His tone changed from gentle to furious in a moment.

"Sirius told Snape how to get into the Whomping Willow. That bastard thought it would be a good prank. He told me later because he had started to second-guess himself," he retorded, "Peter was also there, you just didn't see him. I sent him to make sure Severus gets into the castle safely."

No. 

You shook your head, not believing your ears. This couldn't be what Sirius meant by handling the Snape problem. You didn't want to believe it. Not because you were thinking too highly of Sirius but because you imagined how devastated Remus would be the next morning. You knew how much he trusted his friends.

"Remus..." you muttered under your breath, earning a hum from James that signalled him thinking the same thing. 

"Sirius will be in big trouble. I'm sure Snape had already run to Dumbledore."

You turned to James with widened eyes, he talked before you could panic. 

"Don't worry. He didn't see me as the stag or see Peter at all. That's why I was belated. I'm sorry I couldn't make it there sooner."

"Thank you for even making it there," you whispered, closing your eyes when the castle entered your sight. You avoided thinking about the possibility that James might not make it in time. What would happen then was something tragedic you never wanted to admit. "Will you see Remus tomorrow morning?"

James looked at you with such intense emotion that you thought he was pitying you.

"I will but–"

"I want to be there with you."

"No, Y/N, listen," he scratched his chin. You stared at him in question.

"I will have to explain everything to Remus tomorrow. And by that," he said, "I mean everything."

"James, I want to–"

"No. I don't want you to be there when I tell him how he almost killed you. I'm sure he wouldn't want you to be there either."

"But it's not his fault–"

"That's not what he's going to think in the morning. I'll talk to him alone. Don't insist."

This was the most serious you had ever seen James Potter. Thus, you knew he wasn't going to back down. So, you didn't insist.

By the time you were in the common room, your body had calmed down, now only exhibiting exhaustion symptoms. James hugged you one more time before sending you to your dorm room.

"Shower with warm water and go to bed. I'll be in the common room if you can't sleep."

You wanted to ask him why he didn't go to sleep, but you couldn't even part your lips. So you simply offered him a weak smile and headed straight to the bathroom. The girls in your room were already asleep, meaning you had to be extra careful not to wake them up.

You scoffed at your reflection in the bathroom mirror. Frantic hair, shrunk pupils, a cut on your cheek and dirt on your face. As if all these weren't enough, the gash on your arm was throbbing with pain, blood staining your sweater and maybe even Sirius's jacket too.

You stepped into the shower and let the warm water clean you thoroughly. You clenched your teeth to suppress the groan you wanted to let out of pain from your cuts. The black dirt left you as the water stroke down your body, helping you get this night out of your skin.

Your eyes were glued to the dirt getting washed away, harking back to how the beast hauled you onto the ground. Your skin still remembered the burn from the rough friction.

You couldn't close your eyes, you couldn't even blink. Every time you did, a pair of two glistening yellow eyes would stare at you, threatening to hunt you down if you kept your eyes closed a second more. If you thought about the beast a little bit more, you were sure you would have a panic attack.

So you let your mind wander around something else.

Brown locks, chocolate eyes and pink lips. 

Your lips curved when you recalled his soft voice, the way he called you dove. You warmed up, and not because of the water but because of the memory of how Remus gently stroked your hair. How he wiped away your tears. How he braided your hair perfectly after begging Peter to teach him. How he had always given you something hand-made on your birthdays because he couldn't buy anything.

You missed him. You missed the gentle smile he was always offering you. You missed your tender bickering and his teasing innuendoes.

You had missed your best friend, and no matter what would happen tomorrow, you were going to talk to him.

You couldn't sleep well that night. You even had a nightmare about what happened.

James was late in the dream; you died in the end.

So you stayed up all night, only being able to dive into sleep when the air was lightening up, turning into sapphire blue. At the same time of the day, Remus was turning back to his human self. You would chuckle at the irony if you weren't sleep deprived.

When you woke up, your heart was hammering in your chest. Your roommate was beside you, a glass of water in her hand. You felt sweat drops in your neck and temple; you must be having another nightmare, then.

She offered you the glass, which you gladly accepted. 

"Thank you," you said rather hoarsely. 

"It's almost five in the afternoon, hun."

You sat up in your bed, brushing your hair back with your hands. You had a terrible headache.

"It is?"

"Aye. You sure you're alright?"

"Yes, Lizzie, thank you," you smiled at her before leaving the bad. You were both grateful and uneasy that you had missed the most part of the day. This meant that Remus had already learned about the prank.

You eyed yourself in the bathroom mirror. You looked way better than yesterday night, undoubtedly. Your face had gained its colour back, and your frenzied eyes were glistening with something other than horror. The only flaws were the small cut on your face and the new eyebags.

You got ready and went down to the common room. Because it was Sunday today, the common room was crowded with students. 

Your eyes searched any of the Marauders but failed. They weren't here, and you were hungry. You made your way to the Great Hall, accompanied by nice growls from your stomach. Fortunately for you, it was dinner time.

You were too focused on the food before to find yourself a seat, so you didn't notice anyone approaching you. You flinched when a kind hand touched your arm.

"Y/N?"

"Oh, hiya Lily."

The red-haired girl smiled at you with emerald eyes. She pointed to a corner around the table with her finger. "Potter asked me to call you."

Your eyes found James, who looked as tired as you but still managed to put on a simpering smile. "Cheers," you said to Lily.

You sat next to him, stuffing your plate. Your stomach growled harder at sight.

"How are you feeling?" James asked, watching you nibble on a toast.

"Have been worse. You?"

"Have been worse."

You knew what you had to ask him, but you also knew you needed your appetite at the moment, or you would starve yourself. So you simply hummed and hastened to finish your meal.

You tried not to think about the two empty seats as you sipped your drink. James and Peter were having small talk, trying to lighten the mood. You didn't listen to that either.

You swallowed your last piece as slowly as possible, delaying the inevitable. James looked at you briefly, and you understood what it meant. He raised from his seat, having you follow him.

When you two found an abandoned corner, you turned to him, tuning out the racing of your heart.

"You didn't sleep, did you?" he pointed under your eyes with a nod of his head. You shook your head. 

"Did you talk to him?"

Unfamiliar gloom darkened James's features. "I did. Told him everything."

He glanced at you before averting his eyes away again. "He just listened. Thanked me in the end and said he wanted to be left alone."

Your heart clenched in pain. You didn't want him to be left alone. "Where is he?"

"Dunno. Didn't look for him."

"Where's Sirius?"

James stayed silent for a few seconds. "Dunno, either. We had a fight, but my guess is somewhere in the forest in his animagi form."

You didn't dwell on it any further. You loved Sirius, but you loved Remus more than anyone. Albeit you weren't furious at him, you still didn't plan on seeing him any sooner. 

"I need to talk to Remus, James."

"I truly don't know where he is."

You had to find him. You had to find him and tell him that it wasn't his fault. 

You nodded at James, mumbling a quick bye before wandering around the castle, trying to figure out where he could be.

He wouldn't go to the library. It would be an easy guess for anyone trying to find him.

James said Sirius would be outside of the castle. You were sure Remus wouldn't risk encountering him.

That left you two or three places that you knew Remus would run whenever he wanted to avoid people. So you got going.

You didn't find him at Room of Requirement or Hospital Tower. You cursed the school for being this large in area. It took you almost an hour to get from one side of the castle to another. Fortunately, you were sure Remus was on the Astronomy Tower.

As you got closer and closer to the tower, anticipation chased your heartbeats high, your hands fidgeting with their fingers. You took a moment to regulate your breathing, which had no effect on your pacing heart.

Without wasting one more moment, you entered the tower.

There he was, sitting on the ground, his head low between his hands. Around him was cold and dark, gleaming with the light from the Moon and stars. Your heart ached at the sight of him. You stepped forward, letting the sound of your footsteps alert him. He didn't acknowledge you, but you were sure he had heard you. Heartbreak burned through you, maiming you because of the distance between you two.

Your steps stopped next to him. He still hadn't looked up to you but hadn't asked you to go away either. So you sat next to him, raising your head to gaze at the stars while his head was low between his hands.

"The stars are beautiful, Remus."

He didn't budge. He didn't even move. You peeked at his chocolate-brown hair, suppressing the urge to mess with them.

"Your hair looks nice today."

Silence. You didn't know if he was ignoring you or simply ignoring everyone, and it wasn't something about you.

"Doesn't your neck hurt?"

"No."

You gulped when his voice echoed in the air. 

"It must hurt if you've been keeping it like that for a long time."

"It doesn't."

"Liar."

Silence again. You yearned for his voice once more.

"You can put your head on my shoulder, Remus."

"No."

"Why not?"

"Go away, dove."

His voice was fragile and pleading. It broke your heart, shattered it into million little pieces. A lump made its way to your throat. 

"Why?" you asked, a voice as broken as your heart. "I don't want to go away."

"But I want you to," he loosened his fingers from his hair, dropping them to his lap.

You turned to him. "Don't push me away, Remus."

You reached for his hand, but he gently pulled them away. "Remus, please."

He shook his head, still not looking at you. 

"I need to know why you don't want me here."

He left your side, ambling to the parapet of the tower and leaning to it. You stared at his back in disbelief.

"Remus-"

"Go away, Y/N."

"You won't even look at my face when you kick me out."

Finally, he snapped his head and locked eyes with you. His eyes looked tired, blazing into yours. He had a new scar under his lower lip, from James's horns, probably.

"Go away."

You stood up, frowning in annoyance. "No, I'm not going anywhere," you took stern steps in his direction and closed the disturbing distance. "We need to talk, Remus."

You adored his amber eyes despite your annoyance. You loved to dive into its depth and get lost, sorting out every colour one by one.

He stayed where he was, but you detected his eyes lowering from your eyes. He stared at the cut above your cheek, clenching his jaw.

You unconsciously turned away and hid it from Remus. Memories flooded in a blink and raised the panic inside you. You could still feel the wind hitting your face and the sting from the branch that cut your skin as you fled for your life from the beast.

"It's nothing," you uttered.

Remus scoffed at your face. You saw his eyes change into something harsh and his brows furrow.

"Yeah, sure. The cut in your arm is also nothing."

You didn't ask how he knew that. After all, James did tell you that he would let Remus know everything.

"It'll heal."

"And why is it there in the first place?"

Remus took a step forward when you didn't answer.

What were you supposed to say? Because his wolf form chased you down, and you got injured trying to flee?

"I'll tell you why," he said, voice raised. "Because I hunted you down, tossed you to the ground, and yanked you around. I only did it so I could kill you."

"No–"

"Is that what you wanted to talk about? How I'm a bloodthirsty monster whose first instinct is to kill?"

"You weren't yourself."

"What would happen if James wasn't there?"

You pushed your lips together and closed your eyes. This was the last thing you wanted to talk about.

"No, open your eyes," he raised your head by your chin, forcing you to look him in the eye. "Tell me what would've happened if James wasn't there."

You blinked away the tears that were threatening to invade your vision. Remus made you relive the same nightmare you had that night over and over again.

"Why are you doing this?"

"Because I need you to understand! I need you to understand that I'm not someone you can fucking love!"

You startled in your place, both by his anger and claim. Something had burst into flames inside you now that he had finally acknowledged your feelings.

You opened your mouth to quarrel, to tell him he's wrong, and that you loved him more than anyone or anything in the world. But he didn't let you interrupt him.

"You think I haven't thought about what you said in the last two days? You haven't left my mind for even a bloody second!" his tone was raised but broken.

"You were the one pushing me away!"

"Because I wanted to keep you away from all this shit! I wanted you to see me as something other than a cursed boy. Why do you think I never shared that secret with you?!"

"That secret is part of your story, Remus. If you thought that I wouldn't love you with it, you must've been out of your mind."

You didn't think he understood the depth of your love for him, and you needed him to understand. It didn't even matter if your feelings were not returned.

He shook his head no.

"No one, Y/N, no one loves a monster like me."

"I do," you pleaded.

Words weren't enough to convince him or express your love for him, but you were trying.

He took your arm in his hand and pulled the left sleeve of your sweater up, revealing the gash. You tried to pull your arm back, but he overpowered you, tightening the hold on your arm. You grimaced when his fingers pushed on the scar.

"This is what happens when you love someone like me."

You used your whole strength and tugged your arm back. You marvelled at your tone when you spoke.

"Stop it! You weren't yourself, Remus!"

"How does that even change anything?!" he screamed, his voice breaking and his eyes tearing up. "Don't you understand? I am a danger to you!

"Remus–"

"You think this is easy for me?! I have fucking lost my mind these last two days because you were the only one in it! My brain wouldn't think of any name other than yours! My heart wouldn't beat for any name other than yours! And when I am finally ready to tell you that I love you, too, James comes and tells me that I almost fucking killed you!"

His eyes were blood red, and the veins in his neck had popped up. Tears left his red eyes and paved the way down from his jawline to his neck.

Remus was crying.

It was a sight you had never got used in the last five years.

Your mind refused to work, denying to comprehend the words that left his mouth. It was all too much, and all in one moment.

"You love me, too?'

You didn't recognise your own voice, probably because all you could hear was Remus's confession. You expected your heart to race this time also, but instead, it was dead silent. Or maybe you were just too focused on Remus's eyes.

His tears never stopped, and he never tried to stop them.

He was breaking down at last.

You walked up to him and closed whatever distance was left. You looked up into his eyes as he lowered them to you.

"But you didn't kill me," you whispered, bringing your hand to his cheek. He closed his eyes, raining more tears on your hand. You gently wiped them away.

"I'm here, Remus. I'm here, and I'm telling you that I love you. I don't love you despite your curse, I love you with it."

Remus scrunched up his face, letting out a sob before sinking his head down your shoulder. You felt his tears on your neck.

At that moment, you knew no words would ever soothe the storm in his heart.

So you held him as he bawled like a child.

His crying sent daggers to your heart, ripping it open.

You begged for his pain to become yours so that he would never hurt the way he was hurting now.

You didn't know how many minutes past. All you knew was Remus's sobs and whimpers hurt you like nothing else ever did.

You didn't let go when the heavy sobs turned into heavy sighs or when the tear-fall in your neck turned into warm breaths.

You caressed his hair and kissed his neck when he calmed down. When he talked, it was gritty and low.

"I'm a monster, dove. A monster that will tear you to pieces if you get near."

"I love you," you whispered. You felt him let a short, breathy scoff to the crook of your neck.

"I attacked Snape last night like a beast."

"I love you."

"I almost killed you."

"I love you."

"I love you too."

You shut your eyes, breaking your face into a tiny smile. Four words, one sentence, and his lips close to your neck was all you needed for revival.

Remus inched away from your neck, lingering his lips next to your wound. The red in his eyes hadn't worn off, but the brown of his eyes was blazing with affection.

You drew a sharp breath when he kissed above your cheek.

He caressed the nick lengthwise with tender pecks. His hand grazed your other cheek while the other one made its way to your waist.

You held your breath when he lowered his lips, hovering them above your lips. His hot breath tingled your face, you fought the urge to close your eyes.

He whispered your name, and that's when you gave in. You closed your eyes and unknowingly parted your lips.

One second lasted one year. 

Something flamed up down in your chest when you felt Remus's soft lips on yours. He kissed your lips gentle and soft, but short. Pulling back, he stared into your eyes, chestnut brown darkening with every second.

"I love you," he whispered.

Within a blink, his lips crashed into your lips again, this time more intense, more passionate, taking away the air in your lungs. You melted to his touch, letting his lips savour yours while his hand on your waist tugged you closer. Your breaths mingled together, leaving your heart fluttering in your ribcage.

If time had stopped and trapped you at this moment, you wouldn't complain.

You craved his scent on your soul, his touch on your body and his lips on your lips. But most importantly, you were more than glad to be buried in his love.

He pulled away and smiled at the way you filled your lung with air. You felt his thumb caress your face.

"There's no getting rid of me, now, dove." 

His smile was tired, his eyes still carrying the heartbreak of yesterday. You knew he was still a broken boy inside, but you loved him anyway.

Thank you for reading. Let me know what you think!

if you enjoyed my writing and this fic, please, buy me a cofee <33

[fayesia]

Teach ~ dbf!daemon x reader

warnings: nsfw 18+, p in v, fingering, doggy style, cowgirl, bondage? (belt used to tie hands), dirty talk, face fucking, sir used like once, slapping (mentioned briefly), age gap, degrading kink + a bit of praise

The two of you first met you when your dad invited him over for dinner, the weekend after he had moved into the house next door. Both of you grew closer during special holidays, where the neighbourhood would come together and throw parties. There would be shared glances and conversations filled with innuendos that lead you to walk around feeling hot and flustered.

It was after you left for college when you realised how much you'd miss the small interactions that you assumed meaningless to him.

When you returned for the holidays, your parents invited a few close friends over for a dinner party, including Daemon, meaning you paid extra attention to how you looked.

Dressed to the nines in a beautiful evening dress that hugged every one of your curves perfectly, you made your way into the living room where people were spread out in numerous groups of conversation, soft jazz playing from your parents stereo. That's when you saw him.

Leaning against the wall beside your parents' wine cabinet, the two of you locked eyes, and it seemed like time had ceased, like the room had gone silent just for the two of you. Pouring a small glass of champagne, you let the bubbly liquid flow down your throat in hopes of diminishing the nerves running through you.

Stood in front of the kitchen's floating island, You were glad to escape the insistent question from family friends about your studies and finding a good boyfriend they could meet one day. All you found at college were meaningless hookups that were meant to make you forget your stress... seemed to only make those boys forgot that you wanted to be pleasured too.

Pulled away from your thoughts you felt Daemons hand wrap around one of yours, bringing the back of it to his lips to lay a gentle kiss on it.

"How beautiful you look tonight sweetheart, has been so long since you've come home to visit, hm."

Your cheeks flushed, returning his compliments with a shy smile. "Thank you Mr Targaryen, you look well yourself."

"You flatter me sweet girl but I'm well into my years"

You laugh at his joke, allowing for the release of tension you were bearing on your shoulders since you had stepped out of your bedroom.

The two of you continue the conversation moving to the steps of the staircase, as Daemon asks about college, and you comfortably share stories knowing your secrets would be safe with him.

He reminisces about nights he spent trying weed with his friends while you poked fun at how he struggled to take a hit and passed out in an hour.

But then he asked the question he really wanted the answers to. About the boys at college. What they were like, if you liked any? You grew shy but confided in Daemon, leaving out details you deemed too inappropriate to say. Trying hard to ignore memories of the nights spent imagining him doing the things you wished those boys did to you.

Leaning closer the two of you had moved to sit outside your bedroom wall, supporting each other after too many glasses of champagne and wine.

Daemons mouth scraped the flesh of your ear, "are you still a virgin, sweet girl?". The question caught you off guard, your mouth growing dry while your throat grew tighter and your face hotter.

"No need to be shy. I know what college is like, I apologise if I crossed a boundary-"

Cutting him off you answered, "No...but I'm not experienced or anything". Nodding his head Daemon stared at you a small lift in the corner of his lips, he was thinking of the many more questions he wanted to ask. You continued to speak filling the silence, a bad habit of yours that couldn't be helped.

"It's just...the boys I'm with-no nevermind forget I saw anything." Hanging your head you tried to hide behind a layer of your hair but Daemon reached his hand up, tucking your the locks behind your ear while his hand stayed firmly against your cheek, lifting your face til your eyes met his.

"Continue sweetheart, I'm listening...I hope I'm not assuming wrong.. but I can imagine no college boy knows how to please a girl properly, is that right?"

Nodding your head blushing, "It's silly I know but I just want to experience it properly" Dameon understood what the it was you referred to, to shy to say sex in front of your neighbour who was old enough to be your own father.

"Is that what you want? Someone to show you how real pleasure feels?"

You nod again a small "yes" escaping your lips in a whsiper easily missed. "I can give you that. If you want" Dameons face drew closer to your own own, "is that what you want?"

Your lips are now a mere inch apart from his, with all your courage you answer with a breathy "please" and before you can register Daemons soft lips are pressed against your own.

The lips you imagine on you so many nights alone in your dorm, with a hand down your underwear as you pleasured yourself until release. They were now all over you, on your lips, your neck, your collarbones. And those hands, God, they were just how you dreamt them to feel, rough and calloused as they caressed from your arm to your neck and came to rest on the side of your breasts.

You make a noise of protest at the loss of Daemons lips when he carries you into his arms, laughing at your eagerness, pushing the door open before roughly dropping you onto your bed and closing it behind him.

He pulls off his shirt, removing the belt from his suit pants, while you're patiently kneeling on the bed, your dress having ridden up your thighs and knees spread. Daemon soaks in the sight of you, his gaze matching that of a predator before making the killing move at its prey. "Showing me what you're truly like, huh? Such a pretty fucking slut."

Reaching your arms out, his mouth is back on yours as he positions you to lie down, the movement of his tongue exploring your mouth distracting you from the belt now wrapped around your wrists above your head. The top half of your body is now immobile as Daemon drags down the front of your dress until your tits are bare to him.

His lips wrap around your nipple, sucking and biting at both until your hips grind up against Daemons prominent bulge, the movement eliciting needy moans and groans from both of you. The size of it larger than most you're used to feeling, the thought only making you more eager to see it, touch it or even taste it.

"Be patient, baby, you'll get your reward if you're good. Want to be my good girl l don't you?"

Quickly, you nod your head, eager to take anything Daemond gives you. His hand drags your dress completely off you, stripping you down to the deep red lace panities you wore. His hand traces the small details on it, teasing you when he reaches the area you need him most.

"Mm so soaked for me already. Been so good, pussy so deserving of its reward."

Your panties are harshly ripped down to your ankles as Daemon positions you on all fours, the palm of his hand positioning you into a deep arch. You're fully exposed to him now, and there's no hiding this time. With your hands binded by his belt and your ankles tangled by your own panties.

His hand traces down your spine to the flesh of your ass where he grabs the soft skin. *slap* the feeling of Daemon slapping you comes quickly and in succession with another 3 hits. You're whining against the sheets by now, the wetness of your pussy dripping down your inner thighs which you're sure he can see.

"Please Daemon, want you so bad"

"Yeah? What do you want from me baby"

"anything please just-just fuck me"

"want me to fuck you like those little boys in college can't. You need an old guy like me to. Fuck you so hard you'll never want another cock again. Ruin you for anyone else."

His words have you arching deeper as you present more of yourself to him. Your mouth letting out a near pornagraphic moan when his fingers brush against your folds, two fingertips pressing against your clit.

His other hand comes up quickly to cover your mouth. "Wouldn't want anyone else to hear you be a fucking whore for me now would we, especially not your father. What would he think of his precious daughter being fucked like a pathetic whore by his friend in her childhood bedroom."

Nodding in agreement, you try to hold your moans in, only by the time he has three fingers roughly stuffed into you you're only able to let out a muffled scream into his palm.

He slaps your ass, harder this time "shut up slut what did I say, or do you want someone to come in and see you, pussy being stuffed my fingers" your pussy tightens at his harsh degrading words. Hands tightly gripping the sheets in desperation to grab something as your climax nears, but just as you feel yourself getting closer, Daemon removes his fingers, leaving you whining at the loss of contact "Want you to come around my cock sweetheart."

He stands up to remove his jeans quickly dragging them down along with his boxers, his cock is thick and veiny, it's pulsing head is red and dripping with precum. He wraps his hand around it, leaning his head back in pure pleasure "You don't know how long I've wanted to do this baby, been waiting for you to let me" he's a bit shocked to open his eyes and see you've moved from the bed and down to the floor on your knees.

He nearly cums right there on the spot at the sight of your eyes wide and dilated, your lips wet and swollen from his harsh kisses and bites. "Fucking hell you're a sight for sore eyes aren't you honey" Daemon leads his cock to your open mouth, the feeling of your lips and tongue wrapped around him forces out animalistic groans you've never heard before. But you know you like it when you feel a rush of wetness leak out of you, definitely soaking the floor beneath you.

You try your best to fit all of Daemon in your mouth, which comes as a difficulty, instead wrapping your hand around the remainder which didn't fit. Except the method becomes pointless when his hands grab the sides of your head and he holds you in place.

"Let me fuck your face baby please, you're doing so good for me."

You nod which is all he needs to see before thrusting himself down your throat, the sheer force of it causing tears to stream down your face. The explicit noises of you gagging around his dick and his harsh growls bounce off the walls. You can feel the spit dripping down your chin to your neck as well as onto Daemons balls which slap against your face with each thrust. He's groaning loudly now without a care of who might hear what over the music downstairs, now having changed from jazz to house party tracks. You tap at Daemons thighs when you can't take the lack of oxygen anymore. Your head feels all fuzzy, but it almost feels too good to stop. Dragging himself from your mouth, Daamond pulls you up from the floor, gently placing you into on the bed.

He removes the belt from your wrist which is now sore and red, gently placing soft kisses against them.

"Been such a good girl, you get your reward now baby."

"please sir wannna feel you so bad. Hurts so much, jus' want you to fill me up."

Your brain is barely working at this point. The thought out coming is the only one left in your head. Holding your hip in place Daemon holds his cock, pushing its head in and out of you. The teasing only drawing out more noises of begging from you. When he's had his fun he pushes himself into you, down to the hilt, the laughs from him turning into deep groans of animalisitic pleasure that roar over the squeals that come from you.

"Fuck oh fuck you feel so much better than I thought, just like that yes, fucking tightening around me, like a stupid cock drunk whore"

"Oh-fuck-oh my god Daemon, thank you, thank you fucking me so good" you struggle to get even a few words out, you'd be shocked if he understood anything of what you said. Your hands scratch harsh lines on his well defined back while his lips suck and bite at your chest. You're both sure to find souvenirs from this moment in the morning. His received in the marks of red stinging lines while yours are a mess of red and purple bruises that cover you from your neck to the top of your breasts.

Daemon pounds into you relentlessly, the head of his cock reached your sweet spot so perfectly its like your pussy shaped itself around him the minute he had fully entered you.

He grabs your hips, rolling you over so that you're now riding him. The change in position pushes his dick even deeper into you "fuck you're so deep Daemon-wait Oh my godd" but instead he lifts you up halfway off him and drops you back down to be fully filled up again. Your tits bounce up and down as he tugs at your nipples. Your hands brace against his chest, and he revels at the sight of your face morphed into one full of desire. You bounce up and down on top of him, clenching around the girth of his cock that your pussy can feel almost every ridge and vein he has.

"This is what it feels like, to fuck, with a real man, someone who can give you what you want. Only I can give you what you want" your eyes are closed but you nod at every word he says hanging onto them as you get closer and closer.

The breaking point is his fingers rubbing against your clit. "I'm gonna come, please Daemond just wanna come please please"

"Wait, baby wait for me, let me cum inside you watch it drip out of you, complete your look of being my personal fucking cumdump."

Your nails scratch more marks across Daemons defined chest and as you clench around his length one more time, he grabs hold of your hips tightly keeping you in place while he shoots his loud deep inside of you. "Arghh fuck yes, fuck you so full of my cum have it dripping out of you for days, so you can always remember who fucked you the way you deerve to be. Like a bitch in heat."

His words are barely heard through the ringing in your ears, Daemons cock feels like it's deep in your stomach and all you can see are white flashes in front of your eyes. The only thing keeping you in place is his hold on you, his dick pushing your mixed fluids deeper inside of you.

Cradling you against his chest, he peppers your face in kisses, his arms wrapping around you as your legs intertwine. The two of you lay in a silent embrace before Daemon speaks, "Got to get back before your parents start looking for either of us. Seems like the parties died down a bit." He was right.

The music had dulled to a soft classical number that you knew signalled the end of the night as everyone said their goodbyes and made their leave. Rolling off of Daemon you felt his cum drip out of you, tainting the already ruined sheets with more proof of your sins. As he silently redresses, you smile at Daemon, a lazy post-orgasm one but a smile nonetheless.

Which is all he wanted, to know this wasn't a mistake you would hate him for. Flattening down the mess you made of running your fingers through his hair, Daemon leans down leaving a kiss against your head. "Sleep well sweet princess, and thank you."

"Goodnight Daemon, and thank you."

Letting out a small huff of laughter, Daemon makes his way out of your room and back downstairs to wish your parents a goodnight. Unbeknownst to them that he just gave their daughter the best dicking down of her life that still has her feeling fuzzy and dazed. So much so she didn't even notice the missing pair of red panties from the pile of clothes and pillows carelessly tossed on the ground.

[nhlclover]

𝐇𝐀𝐃 𝐌𝐄 𝐁𝐘 𝐇𝐀𝐋𝐅𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐄 | 𝐆𝐀𝐁𝐄 𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐔𝐋𝐓

— cozytober masterlist !

summary: homecoming takes an unexpected turn for gabe when he meets you and your infectious energy that takes his attention completely off the game.

warnings: brief mention of drinking, a lil kiss scene

word count: 1.65k

notes: fic number five of cozytober! based on 'had me by halftime' by morgan wallen. fall = homecoming = football games and school spirit (roll eagles)

Gabe adjusted his Boston College hat, the brim low to shield his eyes from the mid-afternoon sun as he stepped out of the Uber, scanning the sea of maroon and gold that sprawled before him. The crisp October air carried the unmistakable smell of charcoal grills and the distant hum of laughter and music. Fall was definitely here, but the warmth of the day still clung in the air, that perfect mix of cool breezes and lingering heat that made it hard to believe summer was really over.

Gabe weaved through groups of students and alumni, looking for Jacob. He had texted him earlier to meet up in the parking lot where the tailgate was going on, Gabe figuring he was already set up in the thick of it. Sure enough, he spotted Jacob, who was laughing alongside his girlfriend Olivia, and a small group of her friends.

“Hey man,” Jacob greeted Gabe, dapping him up when he approached.

Gabe returned the dap with a smile, already feeling the buzz of energy around him. "What’s up, bud?" he replied.

“You gonna get in on our pool? We’ve got a bet going about the over-under for total points.” Jacob explained.

“Don’t do it, Gabe, the buy-in is forty bucks,” Olivia warned, receiving an eye roll from Jacob that didn’t go unnoticed. “You blow money on stupid things and then lose them, Jacob, you need better spending habits.”

Gabe slightly tuned out the bickering couple, his eyes scanning the lively crowd around him when his wandering gaze fell on you. You stood just a few feet away, engaged in a heated game of cornhole with some guy, tossing playful trash talk his way. You wore a cropped Zay Flowers BC jersey slightly exposing your midriff and a sparkling stud on your bellybutton. Your hair fell in loose waves around your shoulders, and the bright smile that stretched across your face was infectious.

“You see something you like?” a voice teased from beside him. Gabe forced his eyes away from you as he realized Olivia had caught him staring. A knowing smile tugged at the corners of her lips. “That’s y/n. She’s one of my friends from bio, I’m sitting next to her in the game. I should introduce you.”

“What?” Gabe tried to play it off cool, but he could feel the heat rising to his cheeks. “Nah, I was just—”

“Staring, yeah, I know,” Emily teased, giving him a playful nudge. “She’s great, by the way. She’s super smart, a little intense but in the best way, and she’s got this whole Georgia thing going on. You’ll hear it when she talks, trust me. You should totally go say hi.”

“Ah, I don’t know…” Gabe said, looking back at you. He watched as you threw your head back with laughter, the joyous sound rising to the noise of the crowd.

“Come on man, don’t be wimp.” Jacob urged, giving him a soft shove.

Gabe rolled his eyes but couldn’t deny the spark of interest flaring inside him. “Alright, fine. I’ll go talk to her.”

He stepped forward, weaving through the crowd, trying to figure out how to approach without coming off like a total idiot. Just as you were lining up your next shot, he cleared his throat. “Pretty sure you’re making this guy’s life miserable.”

You let out a laugh, the sound melodic. “Hey, it’s not my fault he’s terrible at this,” you teased, taking your shot and sinking the bag perfectly into the hole, winning your game.

“Wow, I’m impressed,” Gabe said. “Mind if I challenge the winner?”

“You want in on this?” you asked, raising an eyebrow, clearly amused. “Alright, but just know I won’t go easy on you.”

Gabe chuckled, appreciating your boldness. “I wouldn’t want you to.”

The game started, and you made sure to keep the banter alive. As the two of you exchanged playful jabs, Gabe quickly learned a few things: you were from Georgia, which explained the slight twang in your voice and what Olivia said earlier, and you were majoring in biology. It was clear you had a contagious energy about you, something that made it easy for Gabe to be around you.

When the start time of the game neared, you shifted inside the stadium where you and Gabe ended up sitting next to each other, leaving Jacob and Olivia to their own little world. The stands were packed, the atmosphere electric as the Eagles took the field. Throughout the first quarter, Gabe tried to keep his focus on the field, but his mind kept drifting back to you—how animated you got with every play, the way you yelled at the refs, and how you’d nudge him whenever something exciting happened. Football was supposed to be the main event, but now? You were stealing the show.

Midway through the game, you pulled out a couple of airplane bottles from your purse, handing a tiny bottle of Fireball to Gabe. “Security didn’t catch these,” you whispered, winking. “Wanna share?”

He grinned, feeling a little rebellious as he took the bottle from you. “You come prepared.”

“Always,” you said, clinking your bottle against his.

And when the fight song started blaring through the speakers, you threw your arm around his shoulder, singing loudly and pulling him into it. “Come on, Gabe! You gotta show some school spirit!”

He laughed but joined in, letting you drag him into the moment, singing along with the rest of the crowd, even though he didn’t know the words as well as you did. There was something infectious about your energy, the way you were so unapologetically yourself, and Gabe found himself caught up in it.

By the time the fourth quarter rolled around, the Eagles were trailing by 3, but you were still holding onto hope, your eyes glued to the field. When they scored with just 15 seconds left, you let out a scream of pure joy and launched yourself into Gabe’s arms. His arm instinctively wrapped around your waist as he picked you up, the two of you caught up in the moment as the crowd roared around you.

“They did it!” you yelled, beaming as you hugged him tightly.

Gabe couldn’t help but smile back, caught up in your joy. There was something about the way you were looking at him in that moment, so full of life and excitement, that made him realize something. He wasn’t just into you because of the game, or because of how you looked in the jersey, or even the way you made him laugh. He was into you because of you.

As the crowd started to thin out, you hooked your arm through his, still talking about the game, about how this was exactly what the Eagles needed to turn their season around. He listened, though his mind was elsewhere — on you, on the feeling of your arm around his, on how easy it was to be around you. As the crowd spilled out into the streets, Gabe offered to walk you back to your dorm, which you accepted gratefully. The sunset bathed the campus in a golden light, casting a warm glow that made you look radiant in his eyes. You chatted the whole way back, the conversation flowing easily, like you’d known each other for longer than just a few hours.

When you reached your dorm, the orange and pink hues of the sky made you look almost ethereal. The lingering warmth of the day clung to the air, Gabe feeling a sudden rush of nerves. The conversation had slowed to a comfortable lull, and you were smiling at him, your eyes glowing in the soft light of the setting sun. Gabe rubbed the back of his neck, taking a step closer to you, feeling like now or never.

“You know,” he began, his voice a little lower than usual, “I’ve had a really great time today. Didn’t think I’d get this lucky at a football game.”

You tilted your head, grinning, “Lucky, huh? I feel like I’m the one who should be saying that. You were a great seat partner.”

Gabe chuckled, but his smile faded slightly as he searched your eyes. His heart pounded in his chest as he leaned in just a bit, testing the waters. “Can I ask you something?”

“Sure,” you replied, your voice softening in the quiet of the evening.

For a moment, Gabe hesitated, his fingers brushing lightly against your arm. “Can I kiss you?”

The question hung in the air between you for what felt like an eternity, but when you nodded, your lips curved into a small, inviting smile. Gabe didn’t waste another second. He closed the gap between you, gently cupping your face with one hand as he pressed his lips to yours.

The kiss was soft and tentative at first, the faint taste of Fireball still lingering on both of your lips. But as you leaned into him, wrapping your arms around his neck, the kiss deepened. It was sweet and full of excitement as Gabe’s hands moved down to your waist. Gabe’s heart raced as the warmth of your body melted into his, and for a few moments, the world outside your little bubble ceased to exist.

When you finally pulled away, both of you were breathless, your faces inches apart. Gabe couldn’t help the goofy smile that spread across his face. “Wow,” he murmured.

You laughed softly, the sound sending a shiver down his spine. “Wow is right.”

You probably think that it was the kiss that did it for Gabe, that made him want to make you his. That maybe that was the moment when it all clicked for Gabe — the warmth of your lips, the way you smiled right after, or how the sunset framed you like something out of a movie.

But if you ask him, he’d tell you he knew by halftime.

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Learn the Hard Way 2

Warnings: non/dubcon, power dynamic, age gap, and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

Characters: Lloyd Hansen, Nick Fowler (Professor AU)

Summary: you return to campus is less than glorious.

Part of the Bad Professors AU

Note: Please leave some feedback and reblog <3 As always, I love to chat with you all. 

As you watch the man storm off in his wet jacket, you frown. Well, that’s a good way to make friends. Off to a great start, Ash. 

You wince but stop yourself from backing away as a blurry figure hazes in your peripheral. You look over at the girl as she silently holds out a napkin. 

“Oh, jeez, thanks,” you laugh nervously. “Can ya hold this for me?” You hold out your container as you accept the help. She’s the first person who hasn’t looked at your sideways. You keep hold of your coffee and sop up the mess. “I’m fucking idiot sometimes. I was so focused on the noodles.” You glance around at the tables, “shit fuck, this place is crowded, huh?” 

You crumple the napkin and reach for your container. You zero in on the girl. She hasn’t said a word. She looks anxious too. It sort of makes you feel better.  

“Quiet, huh? Well, shit, I just can’t stop talking,” you smirk. 

“Um…” she gulps. “I got a table…” she points over her shoulder.  

You smile, “thanks, that’s nice but… okay. I guess things can’t get any worse.”  

She bounces and turns, guiding you across the caf. You know how she fidgets. Definitely nerves. Maybe a freshman?  

“I’m Ash, by the way,” you introduce yourself as you put your stuff on the table and sit.  

“Auburn,” she replies. 

“Ash and Auburn. One more and we could be musketeers or something,” you joke as you push your cup to the side and open your noodles. 

“Oh, have you read it?” She asks. “The Three Musketeers, that is?” 

“Nah, but I watched the movie. Oh, shit, did you see the real shitty on they made with Orlando Bloom. Fucking loved it. Trash movies, totally my ish,” you yammer as you unwrap the chopsticks. “But maybe I should give the book a try.” 

She nods and taps nervously on her can of diet coke. She wears a gray gap hoodies and her hair is untamed. She’s a bit wild in appearance but you are in spirit. Besides, you don’t have any roomies to latch onto this year. 

“So, Auburn, what do you study?” You ask and shove a buttload of chow mein in your mouth. 

“Erm, computer science.” She answers and curls her shoulders inward. 

“Awesome. I’m doing photography. More of the creatie sort. I’m just tryna push through my degree and decide if I wanna open up my own studio or what,” you shrug. “You know, the computer thing is smart though. No one knows how the fuck to use one.” 

She nods and giggles. You don’t mind doing the yapping. That’s always been your problem but she seems content enough to listen. 

“You live on campus?” You ask. 

She nods. 

“Yeah, I got me an apartment. Couldn’t afford the fees they charge at this place, but it’s nice. You know, I thought I was gonna be sleepin’ with cockroaches,” you shake your head then shudder at the thought. “You ever had a cockroach crawl over you while you’re sleeping?” 

Her eyes widen and you laugh. 

“Don’t ask,” you sniff. “Anyway, Auburn, thanks for letting me crash your party. Hope I’m not annoying you too much. I got a habit of it.” 

“No, no, it’s okay,” she assures you and picks at her fraying cuff. 

“You want some of them? They’re fucking bussin’,” you spiral a wad of noodles around the chopsticks. 

She shakes her head. Well, more for you. 

You sit with Auburn for a while. You only leave as you see the time and realise you need to go to the bookstore before your first class tomorrow. It closes in thirty. 

“Damn, gotta scram,” you say as you pack up what’s left of your noodles. “I’ll text ya.” 

“Sure,” she agrees and gathers up her bag. “Thanks.” 

“Hey, don’t let these other fuckers get to you. They ain’t too cool for school,” you wink and head off. 

You go to the basement and weave through to the bustling bookstore. You stop to search for the course code on your phone and walk blindly down an aisle. As you raise your head to search for 208C, you collide with an unexpected wall, a waft of stale coffee gusting up at you. 

You back up and look at the man as he snaps shut the book in his hand and sighs. It’s that same man from the cafeteria. Oh no. 

“Oh fuck, sorry, bud,” you say. “I was just looking for--” 

“You. Again,” he snarls. 

“Uh, yeah, hi, it’s me,” you confirm. “Look about before--” 

“Do you need glasses or something?” He accuses. 

“Er, no. 20/20 according to my eye doctor.” 

“Not a real question,” he sneers. 

“I said sorry. Really, I didn’t mean too.” 

“You know, it doesn’t matter what you mean, it’s what you do,” he retorts. 

“Wow, are you like a philosophy professor or something?” You ask. 

His nostrils flare, “I’m none of your business, stupid girl.” 

“Well, if I’m so stupid, you shouldn’t get so worked up about a question,” you roll your eyes and turn to the shelves to find your book. “Fuck.” 

“Disgusting,” he remarks. “Someone needs to wash that mouth out.” 

You ignore him. You’ve dealt with idiots before. The stupid frats call you a nerd but this guy wants to call you stupid. Men are too much to deal with so the best course of action is not to. You slide out a text book and double check your phone to match the code.  

The price tag nearly gives you a heart attack. It’s a coursepack. They don’t sell them sued. You resign yourself to the expense.  

The man lingers and you send him a wary look, “were you expecting something else?” 

He glares at you then shakes his head. He shoulders past you, nearly knocking the book from your hands, and you turn to watch him stomp away. Well, what are the odds you run into the same asshole twice? Maybe that means you’re the asshole. 

Big deal. Running into him a third time is a long shot. Besides, you’re less worried about some grumpy stranger and more uptight about the cost of the paper in your hands. You’ll be opting for fifty-cent ramen over the cafeteria special from now on. 

[soobnny]

practice makes perfect — hwang hyunjin.

trope. best friends to lovers. fluff. just kissing.

synopsis. hyunjin stresses how important it is that you help him practice for his role in your university’s upcoming play, especially the kissing scene.

word count. 2.1k words

warnings. hyunjin overthinks for a moment in the beginning. nothing else.

note. hello hi, i’ll be busy with exams in a few days so i thought to post something before i disappear for around a week !! please enjoy :) oh n u can still send an ask to be added in my skz permanent taglist!

Hyunjin’s falling, straight into the fire, because now, the harsh pull of pressure is weighing him down — sitting on his shoulders and refusing to budge from its place. 

When he had decided to audition for your university’s upcoming play, it had been something of mere fun — a passion he was (unseriously) pursuing. It’s not like he had time anyway, he had a lot of deadlines that were way on top of his priority list for him to be participating in something that would for sure take up hours of his days. Hours that he needed.

It just so happens that he likes the play, and knew a song or two to participate in the auditions. It wouldn’t hurt to try out for extra credit, right?

When he got news of his acceptance, Hyunjin was a little conflicted, but grateful for the opportunity. He does enjoy performing, and if his acceptance letter to play the main role in their musical wasn’t enough of a sign for him to maybe start pursuing it seriously, he doesn’t know what else could push him. Besides, he has been thinking about it for a while. Maybe it was okay to sacrifice a bit of his hours.

So, he was ecstatic, to say the least.

But now, seated on his bed at nine in the evening with the script in his hand, he’s starting to regret his decision. What if he wasn’t good enough for the role? What if acting has never been made for him, and he was right to treat it as a silly hobby?

Hyunjin’s thinking, I could’ve really used this time to start that artwork for my midterm project. 

It’s nine in the evening and he’s preoccupied in his own thoughts. It’s obvious when Hyunjin’s nervous — you’ve known him for so long to consider yourself an expert in his not so subtle ticks. The light tapping of his feet, the constant running of his hand through his hair, the fiddling of his fingers and flipping of the pages without a single thought behind his eyes.

So, you swallow the thick air. Your heart physically cannot take the sight of him looking genuinely terrified and conflicted. 

“What’s wrong?”

His head peps up at the sound of your voice, his smile a little too tight lipped for your liking as he shakes his head in response to your question. “Nothing’s wrong.”

And yet he doesn’t stop fidgeting his hands on his lap. You know him too well to not be able to notice.

“Cmon, you know you can be honest with me.”

With a humourless laugh, he sighs and takes your hand in his. He finds that holding your hand has always calmed him down.

Something in the way your hand feels, touching the palm of his makes him feel that the entire world is at his fingertips, and he can conquer just about anything. It’s become a habit for Hyunjin to call you backstage just before a performance so he can spend the time holding your hand, or when he’s about to submit an artwork.

Hyunjin still remembers how you held his hand for the first time, and how he spent everyday after that memorizing the feeling of your hand tightly intertwined in his.

“Are you second guessing yourself?” When he snags his bottom lip between his teeth in response to your question, you know you’ve hit the nail. 

Hyunjin has always hated admitting his insecurities and was thankful you always understood without him having to tell you.

Without missing a beat, you lace your fingers with his and tug slightly to get his attention. He maintains contact with your hand, his nervousness speaking without words as he rubs his thumb in small circles against the back of your hand.

“Jinnie, you can do it. You know, I really wish you could see what I see. Talent and success surrounds you and encompasses the entirety of your life. And I will spend the rest of my fucking life reminding you that you’re so worthy and capable of becoming who you want to be.”

He lets out an airy laugh, his free hand balling up a fist to punch your shoulder gently.

You know he gets the message, though, when he brings your intertwined hands up to his lips and places sweet, grateful kisses on the back of your hand and a small ‘thank you’ is mumbled in between.

He’s really grateful to have you, he thinks. And it amazes him how the one thing that means the world to him fits in the palm of his hand in this moment.

“Okay, now let’s memorize these lines, yeah? Practice makes perfect.”

He whines when you let go of his hand, but swallows it down anyways. You were right, he did need to practice, and there’s still time to hold your hand later and tomorrow and the day after that. So, he nods, getting back up to his feet, script in one hand and the other motioning for you to get up too. You confusingly follow. 

Hyunjin grins brightly as he rummages through his school bag before shoving an extra copy of the script in your direction. Before you get the chance to ask, he’s already nagging at you — “You have to help me rehearse now. No take backs.”

You turn to shake your head, but fuck, it’s so hard to say no to Hyunjin when he’s standing so impossibly close you get an HD view of the stars in his irises and the crinkles at the corner of his eyes and the way his eyelashes flutter when he blinks. Why did he have to look at you like that? How come you’ve forgotten how to say ‘no’?

“Please? Because you believe in me, and being alongside you makes me believe that I can do it too. And because I’m your best friend who’s doubting himself?”

“Fuck you.”

He knows it’s a joke when you begrudgingly grab the script he’s offering you, flipping through the pages to mirror the one he’s on.

“You better treat me to so much food after this. I don’t care if it’s the middle of the night.”

“You’re my person, did you know?” A smile pulls at his eyes, pulling you in for an embrace and staying there for a moment. “I know, and you’re mine too. Now shut up so we can get this over with, and you can buy me my food.”

It was only supposed to be a quick run-through of the script, at least you thought it would. And yet two hours later, you’re still standing with him, going through every single detail and aiding him in which emotions would perfectly fit with the dialogue. 

Hyunjin’s a perfectionist.

He’s analyzing every body movement, ever line, every intonation in his voice. His overenthusiastic energy and burning passion for his craft masks the concave of your undereye and is enough for you to keep going.

It’s not everyday Hyunjin feels this much inspiration, and you were determined to be there with him through it. You know how hard it is for inspiration and motivation to spark. It’s there, and then it’s not.

But in the moment, inspiration is burning bright and you don’t want it to go away. He doesn’t deserve to feel terrified.

Besides, the part you’re playing and the lines you’re being ordered to say gives you the perfect excuse to look at him a little longer than friends do. It allows you the experience of what it must be like to be in a requited love with the boy. For once, you’re not scared to look at him like you always do when he’s looking away. 

You just have to make sure your actual emotions don’t bleed through the character you’re pretending to be.

Hyunjin brings a hand up to his face, dragging his palm down his cheek as he gets deep in thought again — a phenomenon that has been so rampant for the past few hours you’ve been working on the script together. It usually happens in between scenes, when he’s thinking about something. Like how to improve, what to do to make it better, how to connect with the audience. 

Fuck, even the sight of his frustration has you thinking, he’s art embodied into a young boy.

“We should do the last part. I think that’s what we’re missing, why the scene feels so… lacking.” 

You don’t even have to look at the script to know what he was talking about. It was a stupid idea, and you knew it. It was the one specific part the two of you awkwardly glossed over and skipped while running through the scenes. The thought makes your heartbeat quicken.

All you can do is nod at him. Your voice feels too betraying to attempt to even say anything. You can’t bring yourself to refuse when he’s standing so close to you and he’s licking his lips at the thought of kissing you under the pretense of practicing. It’s not like you haven’t thought about kissing the boy before.

Maybe a kiss would finally help you move on?

(That’s complete bullshit, and you know it.)

“Okay, let’s do this.” He’s smiling a little too happy compared to the smile you’re used to, tossing both of your scripts aside and urging you to get into character. 

You fail to hear his heartbeat drumming through his chest and the warmth creeping up from his neck to the tip of his ears and the way he has to bite down at his lips to stop himself from smiling too much.

The scene runs so smoothly between the two of you — the chemistry so clear and undeniable as you spoke each line. When the dreaded “last part” neared, you were sure he would back down last minute due to the awkwardness it might elicit from the two of you.

And yet, he continues, stepping closer.

One step. Then another. He’s grabbing your arm gently to pull you into his chest. A line is spoken, and then another step. His hand finds home in your face rather quickly. The last line. And just like that, he kisses you.

And although the scene called for a short, sweet kiss — his goes on for a while. His lips meet yours in a slow burn of longing, and you can hear your heartbeat pounding through your ears as you kiss him back. His lips are chapped but soft, and the way his hand caresses your cheek takes precedent in your mind. 

There’s a sound creeping up from his throat but he forces it down, his other hand finding home on your face so that he’s holding the sides of your head.

A thrill runs down your spine.

“And cut.” 

He whispers, looking down at you with the most boyish smile playing on his lips, end of his ears overwhelmingly red as he blinks at you with his glittering eyes and long lashes.

You clear your throat, chuckling nervously at your best friend. You don’t think you can think of proper words especially when you’re still basking in the way his lips felt against yours, so you refrain from talking about it. There hasn’t been a time when your words have ever helped you around the boy, so why should they now?

You know yourself too well to understand this is the perfect moment for you to self-sabotage. You know that if he stares at you for one second longer, you’ll trash the pretty lines written in the script and confess how you’ve loved Hwang Hyunjin for years now, and you don’t think you’ll ever stop loving him.

“Alright, now that that’s done, let’s get the food I was promised?” You smile nervously, breaking eye contact and patting his arm to motion for him to pack up so you can get your snacks.

Although, that’s really the last thing on your mind right now. You’re still stuck on the feeling of his lips pressed against yours and how gentle he held your face and the way he tilted his head to deepen the kiss and the stupid way he looked at you when he pulled away.

“I don’t know… I think we should go through it a couple more times. Practice makes perfect, you were the one who said that, right?”

That night, you kissed each other a total of eight times — all in the excuse of perfecting the scene and establishing the chemistry and relationship of the characters you were ‘playing’. It doesn’t matter that both of your feelings are bleeding through, and each kiss always lasts a little longer after the other, right?

You make plans to come by his house the same time the next day and repeat.

Afterall, practice does make perfect.

[fishii-writes]

accidental confessions - koshi sugawara

flufftober 2024 - week 2 | flufftober masterlist

paring: sugawara x gn!reader

cw: kiyoko is readers bestie stan my queen, suga is a flustered silly, not proofread, intended lowercase

a/n: this sucks lowkey but whatever i gotta post smth. i wrote half of this in the hospital 😹😹😹 enjoy hopefully :3 idk if i should continue writing for haikyuu ngl. i’m kinda posting while my body is being numbed lolololol

word count: 510

“maybe he’s just so dense he doesn’t notice.” for what seems like the hundredth time, you sigh. you love your friend kiyoka so dearly, she’s truly the best. but there’s some things she needs to learn to justify. in the name of love, as cringe as it is.

“look, [name], i don’t want you to get hurt. if he’s oblivious to your hints. just confess at this point, it seems easier.” she shrugs, and you immediately shake your head.

hell to the no.

“me? confess? nah, he should date another girl, i’m taking these feelings to the very grave-” you get cut off by kiyoko’s… distraught? expression. what?? you pause.

“… what?” you ask, suspicion lacing your expression as her eyes widen ever so slightly.

“kiyoko, what is it?”

she’s silent. you’re silent. what on earth could’ve possibly made her look at you with such confusion and concern that even you stopped talking??

“behind you…” she whispers, standing up from where you two were sitting on the floor and walking away as fast as she can. wow, way to go, some best friend. you sit still, confused.

“huh?” you mutter, feeling a hand on your shoulder. but you don’t dare turn around, what if they’re a teacher??

“my, oh my, [name]. whose feelings are you taking down to your grave, may i be let in on your secret?” sugawara, your classmate and close friend, smiles as he moves to stand beside where you’re sitting. his hand stays on your shoulder, a friendly habit he’s had ever since you met him.

“uhh, no one!” you nervously laugh, obviously knowing it’s not convincing. not in the least. and you assume he’ll pry further, so you pat down the spot beside you on the floor. he sits down beside you, elbow propped up on his thigh and chin leaning on his hand as he leans in a bit.

“tell me about these ‘feelings’, i’m too curious now to let you brush it off.” he smiles as you simply look away.

“well, if you must know. he’s kind, he’s cute, he’s very pretty, and he’s-“ you get cut off.

“right in front of you? he loves you too.” kiyoko had returned and sat down beside sugawara, a teasing grin on her face.

“l-loves? me? you… we??” for the first time, it seems that the very kept together vice captain of the karasuno volleyball team was flustered.

what gave it away?

his cheeks have a tint as pink as your lips, his speech is all quick and stuttered, but most of all, he’s not denying anything.

reciprocation, allegedly at least, is so weird.

“you’re joking, right?” you laugh. he stays silent.

“right??” silence again. kiyoko laughs, leaving once again, leaving the two of you alone.

“not joking…” you just barely hear sugawara mutter under his breath.

well, lucky you. reciprocation sure is a lovey feeling, even if it’s by accident.

taglist: @laughingfcx , @your-local-reblogging-kazoo + open (send an ask if you'd like to be added! :D)

likes, reblogs and comments are appreciated!! <3

© fishii-writes 2024

[eliluvschan]

Shadow Selfies

pairing: bang chan x reader

word count: 971

warnings: few curse words & cutie Channie

genre: fluff

a/n: am i writing instead of finishing an essay for my deadline on thursday? no im not👀

i was walking my to my best friend Chan’s house. he’s got i don’t know what hair colour cause the man dyes his hair every two weeks now? i kinda lost count.

we’ve known each other for the past five years, but the thing is i’ve always liked him more than a friend.

i like him. a lot.

i rang the bell and Jessica, Chan’s mother, appeared in the doorway.

“hey dear, Chan’s in his room upstairs.”

“thanks, Mama Bahng.” i always call Jessica Mama Bahng, it’s a habit i picked up from hanging out a lot at Chan’s house.

she smiled as we both walk trough the hallway. “are you hungry?” she asked me.

“a little.”

“come on. i just bought these.” she said, putting a batch of brownies in front of me.

“alright then, but just one.” i smile.

“sure.” she turned away.

i took a piece and ate it.

“oh, this is amazing.”

“i know right? it’s a new bakery called Felix’s Goodies, maybe you and Chan can pick some up for the others?” she suggested.

“sure thing!”

“eomma, is Y/n here already?” i heard Chan calling from upstairs.

“maybe later.” i smiled and got up from where i was sitting, and made my way down the hall and upstairs. i knocked on the second door on the left.

“if it’s Hannah, go away. if it’s Y/n, come in please!” he called from inside.

“ugh, rude!” Hannah called as she got out of her room to go downstairs.

i laughed at her comment as i opened the door to the usual shirt strewn floor and messy bed.

“hey, where are you?” i called.

“oh, hey there cutie.” he said emerging from the side and pulling on a black hoodie. he stopped in front of me. “what’s up?”

“nothing much. you ready?”

“ready for what?”

“science!”

“oh yeah. come on.”

so we sat down on the bed and flicked through our books and opened chapter seven of biology. disease’s & microbes.

“i don’t understand this shit.” he said after five minutes of poring over the same page. he scanned the green page and then looked at me.

“what is that hard about learning the freaking definition of a compost?” i asked after explaining the compost again.

“it bounces off of my head. how did you do it?”

“don’t ask.”

he laughed. omg his laugh.

“okay. one more time?” i asked.

“okay. and then we do something else.”

i rolled my eyes. “sure.”

he smiled and sat a little straighter.

“when rotten plants, are piled onto a heap, the bacteria of microbes act on it, and produce an enzyme that turns into any sort of liquid and then they feed on it. this stupid and disgusting process is called a compost. got it?” i asked.

“the crappy heap of plant shit is called compost?” he joked.

i laughed. “yeah. now Bio degradable’s?”

“we’re doing something else.” he told me.

“you’re going to fail the test!”

“no, i’m not.” he said.

“yeah, you are. you’re not paying attention!”

“look, i’ve done as much as i can. and just one def. of bio- whatever’s left. it won’t hurt to leave one thing. and besides, you need a break too.

i thought for a moment. true, i do need a break.

“why are you trying so hard to make me study?” he asked.

“cause friends watch out for each other, and remember Mr. Lee said he’s gonna change out seats so we can’t pass notes or talk at all.” i reminded him.

“aw, you’re doing this so we can talk? sweet!” he smiled.

“shut up.” i said, returning to the book.

“hey, look at the shadows!” he said.

i looked and saw our shadows on the wall, very clear and sharp.

click!

Chan took out his phone and took a picture. soon, we were posing madly and taking pictures in the mirror. then Chan held up his index finger. i put mine across it and made an x. i took the picture.

he held his palm in the air. i calmed mine against it, forming a weird, but beautiful shadow of two hands joined in mid-air.

both of us took the picture. then he curved his hand into a half-heart shape. i curved mine, completing the heart. we took the picture.

i looked up at him, he looked down, not smiling. his eyes full of passion. he stared at my lips, then he leaned in and the next thing i knew his lips were moving against mine and his arms were no longer suspended in the air but gripping my waist.

a soft sigh and a click!

a camera snapping a picture, and we jumped and broke apart. Chan looked around. his mother was standing in the doorway. she quickly turned around and walked away.

“i, uh, i should get going.” i blushed and turned away.

“no, don’t go.” he whispered, holding me back.

“goodbye, Chris.” i moved away. but i felt a tug at my fingers. i looked back. our fingers were still locked. Chan smiled at them, but i hastened to pull them away.

i made my way home, still thinking about the kiss.

i got a text from Chan as soon as i was inside.

Channie😩❤️‍🩹: i made mom delete the picture.

me: ok, thanks.

Channie😩❤️‍🩹: but i still have it ;)

me: what? why?

Channie😩❤️‍🩹: our first kiss.

me: can u send it to me too?

Channie😩❤️‍🩹: [1 attachment]

me: well…

Channie😩❤️‍🩹: it’s uhh, nice.

me: yeah.

Channie😩❤️‍🩹: will you be my girlfriend Y/n? i mean i’ve liked you forever and i know you kissed me back and we are friends- i’ll take you out this weekend if that suits you?

me: uhh…

Channie😩❤️‍🩹: what?

me: nothing

Channie😩❤️‍🩹: then?

me: yes! :D

Channie😩❤️‍🩹: i had fun.

me: excuse me?

Channie😩❤️‍🩹: excused, girlfriend ;) i was talking about the shadow selfies and science of course.

me: oh yeah. me too >_<

Channie😩❤️‍🩹: so tomorrow night?

me: sure. goodnight boyfriend 🤍

Channie😩❤️‍🩹: goodnight girlfriend :)

~

[spaceyaceface]

you are a wildflower garden growing in my head

Ominis Gaunt x f!MC/Reader

Word Count: 3.6k

Warnings: None

Summary: When she learns that Ominis Gaunt is well versed in floriography, she insists on him giving her lessons to learn the language of flowers. Thankfully, he ins't too hard to convince. Requested by @applinsandoranges

A/N: I loved researching Floriography a bit (or maybe a lot) for this fic!!! I'm sure it's not perfect, but I tried my best to be as accurate as possible. Thank you thank you THANK YOU to applins for requesting, I loved writing this so much!!!

Normally, the courtyard was pretty quiet—it was what made it an ideal place to study in the early spring, when the snow had just finished melting and trees had started to bud. She and Ominis had made a habit of sitting out there in the late afternoons, when Sebastian was serving his various detentions. 

That day didn’t seem to qualify for normal. 

Everett Clopton was chasing after a weeping Adelaide Oakes, who had burst out into wailing tears mere moments ago. 

“Addie, what did I do wrong?” Everett shouted after her, the flowers he had given her left on the ground where he had thrown them. “I’m sorry! Come back!” 

The ruckus caused quite the stir in the courtyard, students looking up from their studies to watch the pair—she herself couldn’t help but stop her reading, observing them with a furrowed brow. 

“What was all that?” Ominis asked from beside her. 

“Everett Clopton just gave Adelaide Oakes some flowers, then she ran off crying,” she summarized quickly. “Pretty unexpected turn of events. I always thought she returned his feelings.” 

Ominis frowned. “What flowers did he give her?”

She took a closer look at the flowers laying on the ground, tilting her head a bit. “They’re petunias, I think.” 

The loud laugh from beside her caught her off guard—Ominis usually contained his amusement pretty well, especially in public, so his loss of composure made her brow furrow. “What on earth is so funny?” she asked, perplexed. 

Ominis sat himself back up, taking a deep breath. Small chuckles still escaped him, but he seemed to have control of himself now. “Petunias,” he began, “Mean anger and resentment. No wonder Adelaide was upset.” 

Her own lips turned up in the corners. “Seems like poor Everett didn’t have a clue,” she said. “But to be far, neither did I.” 

“I’m not surprised Adelaide caught on,” Ominis said. “Hufflepuffs are usually more inclined to plantlife, aren’t they?”

“I suppose,” she replied. “Hold on, how do you know the meaning of petunias?”

She didn’t miss the slightest blush that covered Ominis’s cheeks. “My sisters,” he answered. “It’s a form of sending messages that normally wouldn’t be allowed to be shared when properly courting. They’d receive bouquets from suitors and would sit and talk about their meanings for hours, speculating it from every angle. I grew a bit fascinated by it, and learned what I could about the subject flower meanings.” He gave a small smile. “I know much more than the meaning of petunias.”

She smiled, thinking of a young Ominis delving into such topics. She rarely heard him talk about things he was excited about, especially from when he was younger. There was a certain glow to his features when he did—one that fit beautifully with his handsome features. It was subtle; something people who’d spent less time observing Ominis would likely have missed. But she had become somewhat of an expert in the slight expressions on her friends face—likely due to the extended periods of time she found herself staring at him. It had only gotten worse as they grew closer—as her feelings for him became stronger. 

“How come you’ve never told me about any of it?” she asked. 

He shrugged. “You never asked.”

“Well, I’m asking now.” 

He chuckled, hands reaching for his textbook once more. “Fine then. I’ll give you a lesson in floriography. Just give me some time to prepare for it. We better finish our Potions homework in the meantime; Sebastian will need someone to copy off of later tonight.”

She sighed, but didn’t argue. She’d hold him to his lessons, she’d make sure of that. 

-

It took a few days of pestering him until he finally told her he’d teach her about flowers later in the afternoon. She agreed to meet him by the Black Lake—the spring had started to warm up, and being near the water seemed like a wonderful idea. 

When she trekked down to their meeting spot, her eyes widened a bit at the scene. No wonder he had wanted to take a bit of time to prepare—he’d gone out and gathered a wide variety of flora, each of them sitting around him. She couldn’t help but think that anyone who didn’t know of their intentions would have taken the scene as a romantic one. 

He heard her approach, smiling up at her and patting the ground beside where he sat. “My student has arrived.”

“You better not assign me homework,” she said, sitting down. She enjoyed the chuckle her comment drew out of him. 

“I’m sure you’re busy enough studying for N.E.W.T.S. already,” he said. 

She groaned. “God, don’t remind me. I came to escape that for a while.” 

“Well, hopefully I won’t take up too much space in your head with this useless information.”

“Hang on,” she protested. “Don’t go calling it useless. Seemed like Everett would have benefited greatly with this knowledge. Besides, who knows when I’ll have a secret message to decode?” 

He faced away from her, busying himself by grabbing a couple of the plants beside him. Was his face a bit flushed–? Surely not. It was perfectly clear when his head tilted toward her once more. 

“As you learned not long ago, not all flowers are fit for a display of love or affection.” He smiled a bit. “In fact, a lot of them have sentiments more akin to the opposite. For example…”

He reached to his side, pulling forward a cluster of small flowers, bright pink with white on the edges of the petals. “These are China Pinks, or Indian Pinks. I’ve been told they’re quite lovely. But looks can be deceiving, as the mean the giver has an aversion for the receiver.” 

She laughed a bit. “That would be a shock to receive, I’m sure.” 

He grinned. “Precisely. If one wanted to be a little less harsh in their message, one could instead give someone everflowering candytuft—”

“Candytuft?” she interrupted, giggling.

He shook his head in mock annoyance. “Yes, candytuft. Don’t be fooled by its sweet name, it means indifference.” He placed a white flower with many layers down in front of her. 

“Are all these flowers a way of telling me how you really feel about me?” 

Ominis laughed at that. “No, I just wanted to give you a sample of some of the things you can say. Those last two are just as untrue of my sentiments for you as the message this next one conveys.” He showed her a small white flower with a yellow center and red dot on each petal. 

“What’s that one mean? I’m going to burn down your house?” 

“It means ‘I die tomorrow.’”

Her jaw dropped, and she couldn’t help but let out a surprised laugh. “Do people really tell people things like that through flowers?”

Ominis shrugged, setting the flower aside. “They must, if it’s a well-known enough meaning.” 

“I’ll never look at flowers the same way again.” 

“They’re not all bad,” he promised. He continued with his lesson, bringing forth each flower he had brought. She listened to each one very attentively, thoroughly enjoying listening to him. He was right—it was a fascinating topic. She learned magnolias represented a love for nature. Mountain laurels stood for ambition. The colors mattered greatly, too—a red columbine meant anxious and trembling, while a purple one meant the giver was resolved to win.

By the time the sun came to rest on the horizon, her head was swimming with various names and meanings. They’d gone through all of the samples Ominis had brought her, and he seemed satisfied with the lesson he’d given her. 

“There better not be a test,” she said as he gathered up the flowers around them. He grinned. 

“Don’t worry, I’m not that cruel.”

The two of them stood, ready to be on their way. “I’ve got to visit Poppy about nifflers she says she spotted,” she told him, wishing she could spend the time it took to walk back to the castle with him. 

“Ah, of course. You and your beasts,” he said with a small smile. He shifted on his feet. “Before you go, I’d like you to have this.” 

He handed her a large red flower, tall and curving with strange petals sticking up all down the length of it. She took it from him, brows furrowed. “I don’t remember what this one meant. You haven’t showed it to me yet, have you?” 

“Not yet, no,” he said, voice quiet. 

“What’s it mean?” 

He smiled at her softly. “I’ll tell you soon enough.” 

And with that, he headed off toward the castle. 

-

She really tried not to think too much about the large flower occupying the vase in her dorm room over the next several days. Tried being the key word. Every time she walked into her room and saw it, she couldn’t help the slight flip of her stomach, remembering the slight blush Ominis had sported while handing it to her. 

Surely it was something simple and lighthearted. Surely it was some sort of jab or joke, and not any sort of… confession. He had spent that whole lesson talking about what flowers meant outside of romance, hadn’t he? Why would the gift he gave her at the end be any different?

Even so, she found herself checking out a book on floriography at the library, trying to learn the secret message he’d given her. So far she’d learned nothing of it. 

It didn’t mean she didn’t learn anything, though. 

It had taken them several days to find time for another one of their little lessons, with actual studies taking the unfortunate priority. But they promised to squeeze it in on a Saturday morning just before lunch. She’d woken up early to locate one of the things she’d latched onto while reading her book—a variegated tulip. 

Beautiful eyes, the book had told her. She figured if he got to tantalize her by giving her that flower, the least she could do was try to flatter him a bit into telling her. She hoped it wasn’t too forward; she’d told him his eyes were lovely before, but to do so in a language so dear to him—well, it just felt a bit intimate. 

In any case, she found herself headed to the very same shore of the Black Lake, seeing a scene much like the first time they had met there. Ominis sat there with a group of flowers, but this time, they were all bunched together, forming a mis-match bouquet. 

She grinned as she plopped down beside him, tulip tucked away. “That looks lovely.”

Ominis chuckled. “I hope so. All I know is it smells pretty decent.” 

“Is that how you tell all of them apart?” she asked. “The scent?”

He nodded. “That and the texture of the petals. Though I’ve gotten used to using my nose first—I’ve ruined a good number of flowers by manhandling them.” 

She laughed. “It’s a bouquet this time.” 

“Very observant of you,” he teased. She gave him a gentle shove in response, making him laugh. “Don’t abuse your teacher!”

“Don’t patronize your student,” she said, grinning. 

He shook his head. “As my amazingly brilliant and very astute student pointed out, I’m holding a bouquet—” she shoved him again— “which will be the focus of our lesson today.” 

“Permission to leave class early?”

“No.”

“Fine.” 

He chuckled, his fingers beginning to gently run along the different flowers he held in the bunch. “Last time we went over some of the more specific and less used meanings. Today I’m hoping to touch on some of the more common flowers, ones you’d be more likely to come across.”

“Sounds practical.”

“Precisely. I’ve gathered them in a bouquet for you—often times you’ll receive a bouquet so the sender can express more complex feelings, allowing the combination to give a better overview of their emotions and perception of you. So let’s dive in.” 

His finger pointed out a stem holding a few small white flowers. “These are white bell flowers, an expression of gratitude.” 

She hummed. “I like those ones. They’re pretty.” 

He smiled and nodded, turning the bouquet. “Here are oak-leaved geraniums, meaning true friendship.” 

She tilted her head, scooting a bit closer to him for a better look at the pink petals. “How sweet,” she said, smiling. 

His ears went a little red. “The next one needs a bit of an explanation as to why I included it in your bouquet, but—”

“Wait, my bouquet?” she asked. 

“Yes, your bouquet,” he said, red spreading to his cheeks and across his nose. “Now let me continue.” 

“I… carry on, then.” 

His fingers ran over the flowers he’d been indicating once more. “Water willows are representative of freedom. You’re always running off to some place, despite all the rules you should follow, so… freedom.” 

She nodded beside him. “That makes sense.”

He continued on, explaining the reasoning of each flower there in her bouquet. Each one made her heart beat a little faster—he’d spent all that time, thinking of her, picking out exactly the right words to describe her and what she meant to him. It left her grinning like an idiot as she tried to remember each and every thing he said. None of the things he brought up trailed into the realm of romance, but she didn’t need it to. Not now, at least. It was perfect, just as it was. 

“And there you have it,” he said finally. “Your bouquet.” He held it out to her, tilting his head away from her a bit. 

“I… I don’t know what to say, Ominis,” she said, taking it from him and holding it gently. “This is… you’re too kind.” 

“You don’t need to say anything,” he said quickly. “I thought a… demonstration would be best, to help you learn about it. Sorry if I overstepped—”

“You didn’t overstep anything,” she said. “I’m just glad I at least have something to give you in return. I’m sorry it’s not a full bouquet, but it’ll have to do.”

She pulled out her tulip, which looked a little pitiful next to his varied display. But she pressed it into his hand. He felt up the stem gently, and then froze.

“Is… is this a tulip?” he asked quietly. “What color is it?”

She furrowed her brows at his reaction. “It is. It’s a variegated tulip.” 

He let out a breath he must have been holding, a small smile coming to his face. “Beautiful eyes,” he said softly. “Thank you.” 

She couldn’t help but think his smile had a strange tainted emotion behind it—one she couldn’t quite grasp. “You’re welcome. Sorry it isn’t much.”

He tilted his head in her direction. “It’s perfect.” 

-

She couldn’t help thinking about Ominis’s reaction to her tulip the rest of the day. Something about it bothered her—the way he froze up at first, the strange tension in his voice. 

It wasn’t until she looked back at her book on floriography she thought she understood why. 

She’d looked back at the page on the variegated tulip, trying to see if there was something she missed, when her eyes drifted up to the entry just above it. 

Tulip; Red - Declaration of Love. 

Her stomach churned. That had to be it. Ominis had no way of knowing what color tulip she had handed him. For all he knew, she’d been about to confess her feelings to him. 

But had he been full of dread or excitement?

She racked her brain, trying to recall every last detail of his words, he tones, his movements. But to no avail. She was just as clueless of his feelings for her as before

The coming days didn’t help, either. As much as she tried to observe the way he interacted with her, all she learned was… well, that she loved him. She already knew that, of course. But she kept being reminded of all the little reasons why. 

Like the way he whispered snarky jokes to her in class. The way he smiled so slightly when he was amused. The way he walked her to class, even it made him late to his own. Everything about him, really. 

She loved that he made the time to have one final lesson, right before N.E.W.T.S., too. 

Being so sure of her feelings now, she decided to take a risk. Which was why, before she left for the Black Lake, she tucked a red tulip into the pocket of her robes. 

Maybe she’d use it. It was still up for debate—but she’d have it ready if there was even a chance he might feel the same. 

When she arrived at their meeting spot, Ominis was fiddling with the flowers around him. Much like the first time, they laid sprawled out, ready to be dealt with one by one. She came and sat across from him, smiling. “Well, here I am, at my final lesson,” she said. 

He chuckled. “I hope I’ve been a sufficient teacher.”

“We’ll see if I pass the test.” 

He let the smile linger on his face for a moment before moving to one of the first flowers beside him. “I feel like I’ve done a proper job of informing you the uses of flora outside of romance—however, it doesn’t mean it’s still not a large part of it.” 

The flower he held twirled in his fingers. She felt her cheeks heat up a bit—no, she couldn’t get too excited about this. Just because they were talking about love and affection didn’t mean…

“I feel like it’s an important section to cover,” she said, still eyeing the flower he held—pink with drooping petals. 

He nodded. “Extremely. This one I’m holding is a bit… well, dramatic, I suppose. But it conveys the giver’s message pretty clearly. Justicia—the perfection of female loveliness.”

She raised her eyebrows. “Very clearly. I assume you only give it if you really mean to court someone?” 

“Precisely. Would you mind holding it for me?” 

Before she could reply, he pressed the stem into her hand, all but forcing her to take it. She grasped without much thought, as Ominis was already reaching for the next flower. He held up the cluster of small flowers, smiling. “Here we have Peruvian heliotrope. It signifies unwavering devotion.”

He held it out to her, and she took it without a word. He continued on, not missing a beat. The next thing he held was not a flower at all—but he was quick to explain. “Cedar leaf,” he said. “Perhaps not a flower like the others, but it expresses the proper messages. I… I live for thee.” 

There was a tone in his voice that had changed dramatically from when he was simply giving her explanations. A distinct shift that made it hard for her to breathe. One that made her hand feel like it was burning where his fingers brushed against his as he handed her the leaf. 

“Everlasting,” he named, holding a bright burst of yellow and orange petals, “Never-ceasing remembrance.” 

It was added to her growing bouquet. 

He picked up the final flower she saw, a lovely little pink thing, taking the shape of a ball. “Globe amaranth. It has two meanings. Immortality, for the first. But the one I’d like to emphasis is unfading love.”

She sucked in a breath. The petals shook a bit, resulting from his trembling hand. Before he handed it to her, he reached behind him, pulling out a flower that he had let lay concealed there. 

“You’ll recognize this one,” he said softly. She did. The flower he had given her on that very first lesson—the one he told her she’d learn about in due time. It seemed that the time had come. “Honey flower. Love sweet and secret.” 

He felt the same. He had this entire time. He’d sat with her, day after day of studying and laughing, all the while letting his heart beat for her. It filled with with a joy she had never known—one she was determined to never let go off. 

She looked up at his face, jaw tense, and she realized her silence at his confession must be excruciating. She reached forward, taking the flowers from his hands and adding it to her perfect collection before setting it aside. “You mean it, Ominis?” she asked, hoping she had not taken this all ridiculously out of turn. It was relief when he answered in a quiet voice. 

“Every word.” 

She grinned, taking one of his hands in her own before reaching for the pocket of her robe. The flower was still intact—a small miracle she was glad had occurred. “You’ve been an absolutely amazing teacher,” she said, guiding his hand to take the tulip. He wrapped his fingers around it, brows furrowing. “For one, I now know how important colors are when it comes to deciphering meanings.”  She leaned closer, voice coming out as almost a whisper. “I’ve brought another tulip for you. But this one is red.” 

His face lit up in an instant, lips reaching up to spread into the most beautiful smile. The flower was set aside, for his hands found something much more important to do. He placed them on either side of her face, fingers tracing over her cheeks. She held his wrists, letting him lead her closer and closer, until there was no distance left at all. 

The breeze blew softly over them, carrying the floral scent with it. She’d love that smell for the rest of her life, she was sure—because it would always remind her of the way his lips felt on hers.