#and maybe one or two followers if its a hit

[lascvitae]

WANNA MAKE YOU MINE³ ✵ YU JIMIN.

❀ ༉ ‧ ₊ ˚ alt. I WANNA STRING YOU OUT,

I WANNA MAKE YOU MINE .ᐟ

ᝰ.ᐟ y/n plans to flip the power, but karina’s silence isn’t part of the plan. and when she finally speaks, it’s not what y/n expects.

part one. part two. part three.

ᝰ.ᐟ pairing. karina x fem!reader ᝰ.ᐟ genre. angst, fluff, strangers to lovers ᝰ.ᐟ warning(s). cursing, arguing, underage drinking, obsession and possession, manipulation, not toxic if its hot (it’s toxic), y/n is ceo of i can fix her, it’s kinda dramatic for no reason

ᝰ.ᐟ wc 20k (sorry for yapping…)

ᝰ.ᐟ katty hiii guys it’s finally here (pretending like it isn’t 5 am) but i hope you guys like it <3 i rewrote it like 4 times bc i didn’t like it but i’m kinda satisfied w this ending (i lowk feel like its ahh 🥀) also we’re sooo back i graduate monday n i’ll be working on requests next ++ it’s so crazy how i’m close to 900 alr OKAY enjoy

masterlist.

FIRST PERIOD WAS ALMOST A BLUR. you slid into your seat beside minjeong, biting your bottom lip lightly. she looked over at you, brow furrowed in quiet concern. “you good?”

“do i look good?”

“you look like you got hit by the karina train.” she said, making you groan. you folded your arms on the desk and dropped your head. “i don’t know how much longer i can do this. she has a comeback for everything, minjeong. it’s like she studied me before i even got here.”

minjeong didn’t laugh. she just sat quietly for a moment before speaking. “she probably did.” you lifted your head up enough to look at her. “not helping.”

“i’m just saying. she has a phd in obsession but you know that by now. girl is trying to own you.” she shrugged and you sighed. “she’s already halfway there.” minjeong leaned in, resting her chin on her hand. “so… you’re gonna fold?”

you hesitated. “no. i wanna flip the script. i know she’s hiding everything.” that got her attention. her eyebrows rose. “you wanna make karina blush?”

“i didn’t say that. i just want her to… i don’t know. i wanna see what happens when she doesn’t have control.” you paused. “i need her to show me who she really is.” minjeong tilted her head slightly. “what do you mean?” 

you looked down at your desk, voice softer. “i want to know what happened. with jiwon. with yujin. with everything. i can’t ask her. she’d twist it or avoid it. but if i make her slip… maybe i’ll finally get the truth.”

“so you’re not just trying to win.”

“no. i just need her to be real with me. i think part of her wants that too, but she doesn’t know how.” minjeong’s expression softened. “that’s… kinda beautiful.”

“don’t get soft on me now.” you joked weakly.

“sorry— okay. then we flip the script around.”

“and if she falls?” you asked.

“she will. but when she does, you gotta look her in the eye and let her feel it.” minjeong said quietly. you felt your chest swell with something warm and electric. “i want her to actually like me. not just want me.”

minjeong watched you carefully. “she already does. she just doesn’t know how to say it yet.” you exhaled.

“okay.” you whispered.

“alright. if we’re gonna do this, you need to stop acting like you’re surprised every time she breathes near you.” you rolled your eyes. “i’m not that bad.”

“you stuttered when she handed you a napkin. first rule. don’t react first. let her flinch. let her look for your reaction and find none. you stay calm and mysterious like you already know what she’s going to do next.”

“you mean act like her?”

“exactly. be the mirror. let her see herself and it’ll drive her crazy. second, start giving her what she gives you. the little touches, the looks. but make it obvious that you’re doing it on purpose. following?”

“like when i fed her that one time?”

“yes, but crank it all the way up. you want her to be the one biting her lip this time.”

“okay. got it.”

“third, don’t be afraid to pull back sometimes. make her come to you. show her she’s not the only one who can leave someone wanting.” you paused at that, glancing down at your notebook full of notes. “you’ve really thought about this.”

minjeong shrugged. “i had to learn it the hard way.” you looked up at her. “how do you know her so well?”

“i used to be in love with her.” she said as if it were obvious.

“oh. right.” it kinda was. “yeah. it was back when she didn’t know what to do with someone who actually cared. i was dumb. thought i could be the exception.”

you felt guilt and understanding stir in your chest. “i’m sorry.” you murmured.

“don’t be.” the teacher begins the lesson before you can reply.

  ──────────౨ৎ───────────

the bell rings. you barely register it until minjeong nudges your arm.

“hey. study session at my place after school?”

you nod. “yeah. thanks, minjeong.“

you gather your things with calm, measured movements. no rushing. no nerves. you already know she’s waiting.

you step into the hallway and there she is.

karina’s leaning against your locker arms crossed and phone in one hand. her expression is unreadable but the second her eyes meet yours, the corners of her mouth twitch. you slow your pace just enough to make her eyes narrow. 

“hey, stranger. only took you one period to forget what i look like?” she says. you try not to smile, keeping your face calm. then you tilted your head.

“you’re hard to forget.” you said lightly. you stood in front of her now. closer than you needed to be.

“were you waiting long?” you asked.

“long enough.” her voice was smooth but something behind it had shifted. there was a pause and her eyes dropped to your mouth and you caught it. barely. before they flicked back up.

“walk me to class?” you asked, almost teasing. “…unless you have other plans.”

“no. i don’t.” she said slowly.

“then let’s go.” you started walking before she could say anything else. and this time, she followed. the hallway moved around you in waves. everyone was noticing karina but you both ignored it. she walked beside you, composed as usual. she always looked like she was heading somewhere important. even when she was just following you. you didn’t rush. you just walked steadily.

“you’re quiet. thinking about me?” she said, glancing over. you hummed. “you want me to be?”

“always.”

you turned your head just slightly, your expression unreadable. and then without a word, you reached over and slid your fingers between hers. you didn’t look at her, didn’t squeeze her hand. you just held it like it was nothing. karina’s eyes were on you now. you felt the sharp heat of her attention flickering across your face. she didn’t say anything.

you finally glanced her way. “no comment?”

“you don’t usually do that.”

“maybe you don’t know what i usually do.”

you felt her smile before you saw it. “is this a new phase?”

you looked ahead again, unfazed. “maybe i’m just tired of playing it safe.”

“careful. i might start thinking you’re in love with me.” she murmured.

you shrugged. “is that a bad thing?”

“for everyone else.”

you bit your lip. “good thing i just want you then.” karina let out a soft laugh. it was barely more than a breath, but it was real. then, like nothing had happened, she kept walking with the same pace, grip tightened just slightly around your hand.

“careful. you’re starting to sound dangerous.” she said again, her voice lower now.

"guess i’m finally learning from the best.”

“hm. so you admit it.”

“i never said i didn’t.” she hummed again, but it was different this time. it was warmer.

“don’t think i won’t test you.”

“don’t think i won’t pass.” and she smiled. but she didn’t let go.

  ──────────౨ৎ───────────

the lunch bell came sooner than you expected. aeri was sitting across from you, already mid rant. "i swear, i hate school. especially lunch. it’s always the same. same food, same people, same boring ass conversations. i’m ready to just skip it and go home.”

ning rolled her eyes dramatically. “you’re just mad because your salad is a sad excuse for one. i told you to get the chicken wrap but you never listen.”

aeri glared at ning. “whatever. i don’t care! i’m about to leave.” she searched for her car keys. karina didn’t seem interested in the conversation. she wasn’t even looking at aeri or ning. she was watching you with the same calculating gaze, the one that made you feel like she knew every thought in your head before you even thought it.

“every time i try to get closer, you pull back.” she said. her smile was barely there but it was undeniably sly. you could feel aeri’s eyes darting between you and karina. you leaned in slightly, enough to close the gap between you. “maybe i’m just trying to figure you out. you’re not exactly the easiest person to read." karina’s gaze flickered at that, but she didn't say anything yet. instead, she leaned back in her seat like she was studying you, waiting for you to make your next move. so that’s when you did it.

without warning, you slid your hand across the table to barely brushing her fingers. she raised an eyebrow. "nevermind. i take it back. i love lunch. god bless private schools.” aeri chimed in. karina was now looking at you with a little more intensity than before. there was something unreadable in her gaze. then after a moment, her curled into a subtle smirk. something in her was definitely interested now. and maybe, she was starting to wonder how far you were willing to take it. for now though, you’re gonna keep her guessing. just like she kept you guessing.

  ──────────౨ৎ───────────

the final bell rang but your brain had already clocked out twenty minutes ago. you barely had time to shove your stuff into your bag before you stepped into the hallway and saw her. she was leaning against the lockers like she had been waiting since second period. her bag was slung over one shoulder and her hair was perfect. expression unreadable but so her.

“walk with me?” she asked, already turning like she knew you’d say yes. you did. of course you did.

“i was thinking… you should come back to mine. we can study. or not.” she said casually as the two of you made your way out of the building. her tone was light, but her eyes? not so much.

“actually— i’m meeting minjeong. study session.” and there it was. the shift. it was tiny, but you saw it. the slight pause in her step. the lightest twitch in her jaw. it was jealousy. 

“oh.” she said, smiling like it didn’t bother her.

“she’s helping me pass, not planning my wedding.” you said half teasing, but karina wasn’t laughing. she was looking at you like you just slipped through her fingers.

“you can come by after. i’ll wait.” she said, reapplying lipgloss. you were about to respond when aeri popped up out of literally nowhere. “wait for what?”

you raised a brow. “karina invited me over.”

“okay? say yes.”

“i have a study session.” you said.

“she’ll still be minjeong tomorrow. but karina’s house has an elevator. have you seen it?”

“she’s not wrong.” karina muttered, arms crossed now.

“i saw i—“

“besides! karina can help you study. she has snacks too. gourmet ones. the fridge talks.” you turned back to karina, whose expression was neutral but her eyes had darkened just enough to make your stomach do a flip.

“fine. but i’m not staying late.” you said.

karina smiled. just barely. “you say that every time.”

“this would only be the second time.”

“and yet it’s starting to feel like a habit.” she said, already turning towards the parking lot. hou rolled your eyes but your heart was already racing.

yeah. you were in too deep. and you kinda liked it.

karina’s car was already purring in the lot, sleek and black. you had barely opened the passenger side door when a shriek came from behind you. “shotgun, bitch!” aeri shoved past you like this was mario kart and not a luxury vehicle. “are you serious?”

“deadass. my knees hurt.” she said, already buckled in and adjusting the seat. ning raised an eyebrow. “karina isn’t gonna let—“

“let her sit up here.” karina’s voice cut through.

“ugh, she really does get everything!” you slid into the passenger and aeri looked personally victimized by karina’s favoritism. “she’s not even trying and she still wins. i hope your spotify crashes mid song.” aeri muttered, dramatically slinging her legs over ning’s lap.

karina didn’t respond. she was busy driving like she had people to run over. but her hand was flexing on the wheel every time you leaned a little too close to the window. or when your phone buzzed and she saw minjeong’s name flash across the screen. you saw it too. she didn’t say anything, but her jaw did that thing again. and just as you passed the back exit, you spotted her. minjeong. she was talking to someone, her eyes locking with yours through the window just long enough to make your stomach twist.

“oh shit. that was minjeong, right?” aeri said under her breath. “she’s chill.” you muttered. but ning leaned forward between the seats with a smirk. “she looked mad chill. like she was upset or something kinda chill.” karina didn’t look back. just gripped the wheel a little tighter and hit the turn signal. the ride started off normal. well, as normal as it could be with ning trying to pick a playlist. 

“i’m playing doja.” she declared, phone already connected.

“if y’all make me listen to doja one more time—”

“respectfully, shut up. it’s woman hour.”

“i am a woman!” aeri yelled back.

“not like doja is.”

“karina! can we get cold stone?” aeri chirped. karina was just silent. her hand on the wheel and her eyes were forward, but you saw the faintest twitch in her lips. amused. or maybe something more dangerous.

“karina! cold stone? please?” aeri repeated, dragging out the please. karina still didn’t answer right away. she just changed lanes.

“wait— what about min—” you started, already pulling your phone out.

“i want cold stone too. and i’m not about to third wheel y’all studying about cells and shit.” ning cut in. “we wouldn’t even be stu—” you paused, caught yourself, and then gave karina a look. “we’re not even gonna study, are we?”

karina finally glanced at you, eyes sharp and unreadable. “i don’t know. depends if you’re a good girl.” aeri made a noise that might’ve been a gag. “oh my god. please send her to jail.”

ning cackled. “nooo, let her have her moment. let them be weird.”

karina’s hand slid from the wheel to the center console, fingers brushing yours like it was casual. it wasn’t. “so? cold stone?” she asked quietly. you exhaled, letting your phone drop into your lap. “fine. but nothing crazy.”

“that’s what victiorian children say before they try my order and see god.”

“you put gummy bears and marshmallows in it.”

“it’s texture.”

ning rolled her eyes. “it’s giving diabetes.” karina didn’t say a word, but when the turn signal clicked again, you realized she had already taken the exit.

and yeah. maybe minjeong would be pissed. but as you watched karina change lanes like she owned the road and felt her fingers barely grazing yours again, you couldn’t find it in yourself to care. the cold stone parking lot was mostly empty, late afternoon sun casting long shadows over the building. karina pulled into a spot and looked over at you.

“stay close.” she said.

aeri was already halfway out the car, yelling something about birthday cake remix and how “cookie dough is a lifestyle.” ning followed behind her. you stepped out and felt karina’s hand brush yours again, then linger for just a second too long. you glanced up at her. “you always like this about ice cream?”

“only when you’re involved.” she said, walking ahead like she didn’t just throw you off guard. you caught up fast. inside, the cold stone was blaring early 2010s pop. aeri was already at the glass, pressed up against it like a child, pointing aggressively at mix ins.

“that. and that. and— yes, extra sprinkles.”

ning was pulling out her phone to take a picture of her nails in front of the rainbow display. you looked over at karina. she wasn’t looking at the ice cream. she was watching you.

“what?” you asked.

“what do you want?”

“me?”

“mmhm.”

“uh… coffee ice cream. brownies. fudge. maybe caramel…”

“why are you looking at me like that?” you laughed nervously. 

“just figuring you out. you give strawberry energy but you order differently.” she said, lips twitching into a smirk.

“is that a bad thing?”

“not at all.” you were about to say something back when aeri waved you over, two samples already melting in her hand.

“taste test. now.” karina just stepped back, letting you take your time. and when you finally got your cup — caramel dripping down the side and way too many brownies packed in — she paid without asking. you opened your mouth to protest but she just raised a brow.

“habit.” she said simply. you didn’t argue. not this time. maybe you were getting pulled deeper into something you didn’t fully understand yet. but you were warm, full of sugar, and karina was walking next to you like she’d always been there. and for now? you let it happen.

you stepped outside into the gold drenched dusk, caramel already threatening to drip down your wrist. aeri and ning were arguing about who would win in a cage match between taylor swift and doja cat, both talking at the same time. karina walked beside you in silence, but it wasn’t awkward. it was heavy. intentional.

you stole a glance at her as you walked. perfect posture. gaze straight ahead. one hand tucked in her jacket pocket.

and that’s when it hit you. this was the plan.

the detour. the ice cream. the quiet touches. the eye contact. even letting aeri and ning come along, keeping it casual. giving you space, but not too much. you were never going to study with minjeong today.

you paused mid step, and karina noticed. of course she did. “something wrong?”

you looked up at her, heart racing just a little. “you knew what you were doing.”

karina blinked, slow and deliberate. “elaborate.”

“you changed the subject. distracted me. gave me sugar so i wouldn’t be mad.”

she tilted her head. “did it work?” you stared at her, at the way her smile ghosted across her lips like she already knew your answer. and maybe she did.

“you’re insane.” you muttered.

“so i’ve heard.” you didn’t pull away when she brushed her fingers against yours again. because deep down? you already knew this was the plan from the moment she said 'walk with me.'

karina’s place was quiet when you walked in. the kind of quiet that felt designed. she casually kicked her shoes off by the door and you followed suit, already feeling the marble under your socks like it was judging you. aeri flopped onto the couch like she paid rent there. “okay so. what’s the plan.”

“we literally just got here.” you said, setting your cold stone cup on the table.

“yeah and i’m already bored. can we do something? like a movie? or a game? strip uno?” ning looked up from scrolling. “girl. we are not doing strip anything with y/n and rina.”

aeri rolled her eyes so hard you thought they might get stuck. “oh my god, i meant it casually. like not full nipple. just a vibe.”

“we’re not playing strip uno, we need a better plan.”

you settled into the arm of the couch, spoon halfway to your mouth. “what happened to watching a movie?”

“that’s what people do when they’re boring.” ning said, crossing one leg over the other. “we should do something new. like— break into the community pool?” karina, who had been quiet this whole time, finally spoke. “we’re not breaking the law.”

“ugh, fine. then…” ning sat up straighter, eyes flicking between the three of you. 

“let’s throw a party.”

“what?” you asked, spoon now frozen mid air.

“friday night. here. exclusive.” she said it like she was offering you a gift. karina didn’t even blink. “ning.”

“what? come on. you haven’t hosted anything since halloween and that doesn’t even count. i blacked out.”

aeri looked interested now. “i’m down. i’ll make a playlist. we can do a dress code. like hot but scary?”

“okay but—” you glanced at karina. 

“you’re just gonna say yes to this?” karina tilted her head like she was studying you. “you don’t want to?”

you opened your mouth, paused. “i mean. i didn’t say that.” ning grinned. “so that’s a yes. party on friday. hosted by our very own karina yu.” karina just leaned back into the couch, spooning a piece of your brownie into her mouth like this was exactly how she wanted it to go.

aeri clapped. “yesss. i’m texting people. hot but scary, byob!” you watched as karina used your spoon again, completely unbothered by personal space. “you’re just gonna eat mine?”

“you said you didn’t want anything crazy.” she said, chewing. “this is crazy.”

“you’re insane.”

“you like that.” karina smiled with her whole face this time. you muttered something under your breath that definitely wasn’t denial and ignored how aeri and ning exchanged a look behind you. and when your phone buzzed again, another unread message from minjeong, you turned it over without checking. because suddenly, friday didn’t feel that far away. karina fed you some of your ice cream and you were starting to realize everything always went exactly how she wanted.

friday morning, the school hallways were buzzing in that weird, overstimulating way they always were after a party was announced. and a scandal. and even though you hadn’t caused the latest scandal (yet), walking in next to karina still made you feel like a headliner. she was close. closer than usual. one hand brushing the small of your back like a warning and a claim all at once.

“you slept okay?” she asked like it wasn’t 8:06 a.m. and you weren’t actively trying to survive.

“barely. someone kept texting me party theme ideas at 2 a.m.” you muttered, adjusting your bag.

“aeri’s passionate.”

“aeri’s insane.”

“and you’re invited to be insane with us.” she said, glancing sideways at you. you were just about to respond when you saw her — minjeong. heading down the hall. she stopped a few feet away, eyes flicking between you and karina. “morning.”

you hesitated. “hey.”

karina was the one who stepped forward, expression unreadable but voice light. “you coming tonight?” minjeong looked confused. “to what?”

“party at my place. ning’s idea. hot but scary. you’d fit.” karina said, tone smooth. you glanced between them and minjeong raised an eyebrow. “you’re inviting me?”

karina smiled. it was tight lipped and dangerous. “sure. we’re all friends now, right?” minjeong didn’t respond right away. “...i’ll think about it.” and just like that, she walked off.

you turned to karina. “was that necessary?”

“completely.” she said, already walking again. and of course you followed.

first period felt slower than usual. maybe because you were hyper aware of the way karina sat next to you, ankle lightly brushing against yours under the table. your mind wasn’t on the teacher. it was on her. and the fact that today... maybe you were going to initiate the plan. so when karina leaned over, voice low against your ear, "you zoning out?" you didn’t flinch. instead, you turned your head just enough that your nose almost brushed hers and smiled sweetly.

"you’re watching me again."

“i am.” she said simply, looking back at the board. you glanced down at your notebook. “you’re not very subtle.”

karina didn’t look at you, but her pen stilled. “you think so?”

“i know so.” she hummed. you flipped to a new page in your notebook, letting your pen hover.

“you look very pretty today.” now she looked at you. briefly.

"mhm?”

“yeah. i really like your hair.” karina didn’t respond. she just glanced down at your hand resting near hers and went back to writing like she didn’t hear you. but you saw it. the slight curve in her mouth, the slow drag of her pen. it was amusement. maybe interest.

“thanks.” she purred, eyes flickering down to your lips. you didn’t push. and for the rest of class, she didn’t say a word. but she didn’t move away either. when the bell rang, she stood first. cool and unbothered. “let’s go.”

by the time lunch rolled around, you found yourself walking beside minjeong again, the two of you weaving through the courtyard like nothing was weird. like she didn’t disappear right after karina’s invitation.

“so. you gonna come friday?” you said, nudging her lightly. minjeong just looked ahead. “you want me to?”

you shrugged. “i wouldn’t hate it.” she let out a quiet breath. not quite a laugh. “that’s the most lukewarm invitation i’ve ever gotten.” you smiled but didn’t say anything. there was a pause. you were about to speak when—

“y/n.” her voice. smooth. always at the wrong time. you turned to see karina already approaching, like she didn’t just interrupted something. no, like she didn’t care if she did.

“hey.” you said, slower this time. karina’s gaze flicked to minjeong for a second, unreadable. “can i steal you?”

minjeong crossed her arms, subtle but still not that subtle. you glanced between them, heartbeat a little too loud in your ears. karina tilted her head, a small smile playing at her lips. “i brought you something.”

“what?” karina held up a small brown bag. “double chocolate muffin. the good kind. from the café off main.”

you stared at the bag, then at her. “you left campus?”

“i was early.” minjeong let out a low scoff just under her breath. not enough to cause a scene, but enough to register. karina didn’t react. just held the bag out to you again. “you coming?” you hesitated, but only for a second before taking it.

“thanks.” you said, voice quiet. karina nodded once. then you looked back at minjeong. she didn’t say anything. didn’t stop you. she just watched you walk away. and as you followed karina across the quad, hand curled around the still warm muffin, you tried not to think too hard about the fact that she always, somehow, pulled you back to her.

you ended up at the usual spot, half tucked under karina’s arm on the bench while aeri and ning fought over something across from you. karina wasn’t saying much. just slowly picking the chocolate chips out of the muffin she bought you like it was hers now. you didn’t call her out for it.

“okay, okay. tonight.” aeri said suddenly, slapping her hands down on the table. “tonight.” ning echoed, mouth full.

“i’m thinking. we start hot but scary… and end with hot and scandalous.” aeri continued, lowering her voice like she was about to reveal a fbi level secret. ning laughed. “girl. you just wanna make out with someone.”

“no shame in that.” ning shrugged. then looked right at you with a glint in her eye.

“you’re bringing a costume, right y/n?” karina’s hand stilled against the muffin and you just stared. “costume?”

“duh. you can’t just show up ‘normal.’ it’s gotta be scary or hot. preferably both.” ning grinned. karina finally spoke. “she’ll figure it out.”

but ning wasn’t done. “i’m just saying. people are gonna go crazy tonight. last year, someone hooked up in the upstairs bathroom.”

aeri fake gagged. “in the pink guest room?”

“yup.” you raised an eyebrow. “wait. upstairs?”

ning nodded. “you’re allowed up there... if you’re invited.” karina’s fingers tapped the table once. sharp. deliberate.

“ning.”

ning smiled wider, like she loved being warned. karina turned to you, voice softer now. “you don’t have to worry about that.”

you looked at her, curious. “why not?”

karina tilted her head slightly, a slow smile curling at the edges of her mouth. “because you’ll already be where you’re supposed to be. with me.”

ning let out a groan. “god. you two are insufferable.”

“you’re just mad you’re single.” aeri laughed.

“single by choice!” ning shouted. you just shook your head, laughing under your breath. but when you glanced back at karina, she was already watching you. and she didn’t look like she was joking. not even a little bit.

the rest of the day dragged the way it always did when something bigger was happening. you barely processed half your classes and aeri yelling something about "outfits" across the parking lot. because you were thinking about tonight.

by the time the final bell rang, you needed air. you found minjeong near the side entrance. she looked up when you approached, face shifting through about five different emotions before she settled on neutral.

"hey.” you said.

"hey.” she echoed. for a second, neither of you moved. then you both started walking at the same time, falling into step without needing to talk about it. it was easy with minjeong. easier than it should’ve been, considering everything.

"you should come.” you said, breaking the silence. it felt refreshing to finally have a conversation with her today. but your voice was too gentle. you heard it and you hated it. minjeong looked at you like you were impossible. like you didn’t get it.

"you’re not gonna be able to fix it. not with me there.” she said.

you shoved your hands into your pockets. "maybe not. but i don’t want you alone, either."

minjeong just shook her head, stepping back onto the path. "i’ll think about it." it wasn’t a yes. but it wasn’t a no, either. you stood there for a second after she left, staring at the spot where she’d been, feeling heavier than you should. and when you finally turned, when you finally made your way to the front of the school—

karina was waiting. leaning against her car with her arms crossed and eyes hidden behind dark sunglasses. you almost laughed. almost. until she pushed off the car and walked over.

"busy?" she asked, voice casual. too casual.

"talking to minjeong."

karina tilted her head like she was pretending to think about that. "hmm." you raised an eyebrow. "what?"

"nothing. you’re loyal. it’s cute.” she said, stepping closer and lowering her sunglasses enough that you could see the glint in her eyes. you flushed, hating how easily she could still make you react. the plan wasn’t going very well yet.

karina smiled then reached out, tugging your backpack strap like a leash, pulling you one step closer. "don’t worry. you won’t be thinking about her tonight.” she said, voice low, only for you. and then she let go, walking around you to the driver’s side like she didn’t just set something on fire between you. you stood there for half a second. then you followed. because somehow, even knowing everything you knew, you were still walking straight into her arms. and maybe you wanted to.

the drive was quiet at first. but not the awkward kind. karina lazily kept one hand on the wheel, glancing at you every so often like she was thinking things she wasn’t saying. you stared out the window, pretending not to feel it. halfway to your house, she finally spoke.

"what are you wearing tonight?"

“what?"

"for the party. you can’t just show up in a hoodie.” she tapped the wheel once, nails clicking.

"thanks for the vote of confidence.” you muttered, crossing your arms. karina just smiled, unbothered.

"i’m serious. it’s a theme."

"i’ll figure something out." karina didn’t respond right away. she just kept driving.

"i sent something to your house."

you turned your head, eyebrows lifting. "what?"

"you’ll see." you stared at her but she just smoothly pulled up in front of your place, putting the car in park. 

"i’ll see you tonight." she said simply, fingers drumming once against the wheel. you hesitated, halfway out the door.

"karina—"

"tonight." her voice cut you off. soft but firm. "wear it." you didn’t say anything else. you just shut the door and stood there, watching her drive away. and sitting there on the doorstep like a warning was a black box, tied with a silver ribbon. your name in her handwriting. you untied it with shaky fingers, peeled back the tissue paper and stared.

lace. straps. the outfit wasn’t just hot and scary. it was a problem. and you were going to wear it.

  ──────────౨ৎ───────────

you didn’t text her you were coming. didn’t say a word in the group chat. just got ready slowly like you weren’t already an hour late.

you wore the outfit karina sent. every strap, every inch of lace. but you added your own twist. a little jacket she didn’t pick. cat ears. eyeliner whiskers. and a thin black ribbon around your neck like a collar. you needed a costume and that was the point.

the uber dropped you off just past 10:30. the bass from the house hit before the front steps did. lights flashing behind the windows. laughter spilling out onto the lawn. someone was already throwing up in a bush. you didn’t go to the door right away. you took your time. karina had made you wait before and you were returning the favor. by the time you walked in, the party was deep. and the moment you stepped through the door, people turned.

you were late. and you were seen. someone gasped — maybe ning — and somewhere across the room, aeri shouted “OH my god.” but karina was near the stairs. leaning against the wall like she hasn’t been checking the door all night. glass in one hand, with an unreadable expression. but her grip on the railing tightened the second she saw you.

you felt it, but you didn’t go to her. not yet.

you let her watch you walk through the crowd. let her see someone stop you to talk. and when you finally made it close enough, just barely within arm’s reach, she stepped forward — quiet but intense.

“you’re late.”

“am i?”

her eyes dragged down your body like she paid for it. and, technically, she did.

“you wore it.”

“you sent it.” there was silence before karina spoke again. “take off the jacket.”

you raised an eyebrow. “you don’t wanna say hi first?”

“hi. now take it off.” you held her gaze. then slowly tugged at the jacket on your shoulders. 

"holy shit." aeri said before you could even take your jacket off. ning was behind her, eyes wide with her drink in hand. karina disappeared in an instant. “okay, you were holding out on us.”

you shrugged like you didn’t know exactly what you were doing. “was i?” aeri circled around you like you were on display, grabbing the edge of your jacket sleeve. “karina’s gonna lose her mind.”

"you say that like she hasn't already.” you muttered, eyes flicking toward the stairs where karina had just gotten pulled into a conversation by someone too rich and too loud to ignore. her eyes stayed on you as long as they could. but eventually, she had to look away. ning noticed it too. “...you planning something?”

you turned, expression calm but playful. “depends. you two wanna help?” aeri smiled immediately and ning leaned in. “always.”

you glanced over your shoulder, making sure karina was still busy. she was. but not for long. “okay. so. karina. she always watches. but she never really moves. she stays two steps ahead. like it’s a game she already won.” you murmured, turning back to them.

“because it is. and she always wins.” ning said.

“not tonight. tonight she’s gonna chase. i don’t want any of that. just... her.” you said. aeri raised an eyebrow. “you sure you can handle that?”

“not the point. i want her to feel something. enough to drop the act.” 

“I’m in. what’s the plan?” you leaned in. “simple. we make her jealous. curious. we make her wonder. and when she’s finally about to snap? that’s when i pull her upstairs.”

“and then?”

“then we see who she really is.” you were three sips into your drink when aeri leaned closer, fake casual.

“you know she didn’t used to be like this.” she said like she was commenting on the music. “like what?” you asked, already knowing the answer.

ning leaned her elbows on the counter next to you, swirling the drink in her cup. “like… karina.”

“possessive. obsessive. scary hot but scary scary.” aeri added.

“she was always hot. but she used to be fun.” ning said.

“she’s not fun now?”

ning gave you a look. “i mean… she’s fun.”

“but not in a ‘would lose a game of truth or dare without threatening someone’ way. she used to let people win.” aeri sighed. you raised an eyebrow. “so what changed?”

they exchanged a glance. you caught it. “what?” you asked.

“nothing. just… you kinda right. she used to be different.” she waved a hand. “before freshman year?” ning’s eyes narrowed like you were too clever for your own good before shrugging.

“it’s just… she wasn’t always like this. before freshman year, she was—” she paused. “different.”

aeri shot her a look. “ning.”

“i’m not saying anything bad!” ning insisted. then looked back at you. “just… there was someone before. yujin. and i think she lost her because she didn’t show how much she really wanted her until it was too late.” you frowned. “what happened?”

“ask her. but maybe don’t bring up yujin’s name unless you want a whole thing.” ning said, suddenly breezy again. you took another shot and spun in a slow circle. “well now i need to know everything.”

“you’ll get your moment. because she hasn’t taken her eyes off you since you walked in. even now. especially now.” ning said, nodding towards karina. you looked at her.

“she hasn’t even moved. i thought she would come over by now.” you said, sipping whatever mystery drink aeri handed you.

“oh, she’s watching. she’s doing that thing where she pretends not to care.” aeri muttered, eyes flicking past your shoulder. “which is funny considering the way she acts like she owns you in public.” ning added. 

you raised an eyebrow. “does she?”

“babe. she bought your outfit, picked your earrings and threatened that one guy that looked at you. she’s claiming you.” aeri said, smiling. “well, she’s gonna have to prove it.”

you weren’t sure if it was the alcohol or the music or the adrenaline from knowing karina could walk up at any second, but your skin buzzed. and you didn’t have to wait long. you turned your head — and there she was. karina. still in that dark wine colored dress that clung in all the right places, dipped low in the back and slit high on the side. her hair was pulled back, earrings catching the light. it was the kind of look that made everyone in the room aware of her without her saying a word.

she stepped in close. close enough to make your heart pick up but not enough to make it obvious. her eyes moved slowly. the cat ears, the black ribbon tied like a collar, the slick fabric of your dress that she bought, shortened and sharpened into a sexy little costume. she smiled. slow and warm. but not soft.

"where was i?" karina’s eyes flicked to your neck, then back to your mouth. “you’re a problem.”

“you like it.”

“i do. maybe too much.” she didn’t hesitate. a moment passed, heavy in the air. then her voice dropped softer, only for you.

“i can’t decide what i like more. that you wore something i picked or that you made it look like this.” she murmured, eyes dragging over you again. your skin buzzed and aeri cleared her throat.

“okay. we’re gonna go… anywhere else.” she said loudly, grabbing ning’s wrist. they disappeared into the crowd again, half laughing. karina didn’t look away.

“come find me later?” she said, like it was both a question and a guarantee. you raised your brows, voice light while you pouted. “you’re leaving me? what if i don’t wanna?”

her jaw tensed just enough. but then she smiled again, tight lipped. “don’t make me come looking for you.”

and with that, she turned and walked back towards the hallway, already being pulled into conversation by someone else. but you felt it. her eyes? they never really left.

you settled at the kitchen counter once more, nursing a cup in your hand while you allowed your head to shake to the beat.

that was when a guy slowly approached you, oblivious to the pair of eyes burning onto your skin.

he was tall. broad. the kind of guy who wore chains he probably didn’t earn and smiled like he expected the world to swoon.

“hey. you new around here?” he said, already sliding into your space like he was invited.

you raised an eyebrow, sipping your drink. “do i look new?”

“no. but you look like something i want.”

you laughed once at his boldness.

his smile widened. “i’m yeonjun.”

of course he was. you knew him. everyone knew him. 

you let him talk. let him compliment your costume, call you the hottest catgirl he’s ever seen, try and touch your hand while you adjusted your ribbon.

and across the room, karina was watching.

she wasn’t pretending anymore.

aeri and ning came in from the kitchen with drinks in hand, glitter everywhere, and both of them already yelling.

“hello?? did you get a fan club?” aeri shrieked.

“oh my god. is that yeonjun?” ning said, mouth open.

“it is.” you muttered, barely glancing at him.

“he’s so hot but so dumb. literally everyone wanted to fuck him last year.” aeri whispered.

yeonjun, entirely oblivious, smiled at you. “they your friends?”

“sort of.” aeri smiled, looping her arm through yours.

yeonjun tried to say something else but was immediately ignored.

“okay, now turn your head three inches to the left. karina is locked in.” ning said, sipping her drink dramatically. you didn’t even have to look. you could feel it.

“she hasn’t blinked in like a full minute. she’s either gonna die or commit a crime.” aeri said. 

“so same as usual.” ning shrugged.

you turned back to yeonjun. “so, what are you supposed to be?”

“uh, myself. ‘cause you know…” he said, flexing slightly.

“god. he’s so lucky he’s pretty.” aeri whispered behind her drink.

you smirked and leaned a little closer to him, letting your hand rest on your own hip. not his. not yet.

you were about to respond until you saw minjeong in the corner of your eye. 

leaning against the archway like she was standing there for a while. cup in hand and gaze fixed on you.

your smile dropped.

yeonjun was still talking but you couldn’t hear him. you murmured something to him, an excuse maybe, and slipped away before he could stop you.

the noise of the party dulled the closer you got to her.

“hey.” you greeted. 

“hey yourself. so this is what happens when karina plays dress up.” she said, eyes scanning your outfit.

you smiled faintly. “don’t start.”

“not starting anything. just making an observation.” she said in an amused tone.

you both stood there for a second, the party pulsing behind you. then she nudged your cup with hers.

“so. how’s the plan going?” minjeong said a little quieter. your throat tightened slightly.

“still intact.”

“good. keep it that way.” she nodded once.

you stared at her. “you sound like you think i’m gonna slip up.”

minjeong shrugged. “no. i know how she works.”

your silence said more than it should’ve.

minjeong offered a small smile. “i’m not here to scare you. stop doing that.”

“what did i do?”

“you keep going silent on me.”

“what am i supposed to say?”

“i don’t know. what are you thinking?” minjeong shrugged. 

“i want her but i want the truth.”

“i think you can get it. just be careful. i like you and i’d rather not watch her snap you in half just because you forgot she’s not playing fair.”

her eyes softened.

“just don’t lose yourself in her. not all at once.”

before you could reply, she was already walking away to the sound of someone calling her name.

you stood there for a moment, letting minjeong’s words settle.

then—

“HELLO? y/n??”

aeri appeared in front of you out of nowhere, cheeks flushed and glitter in her lashes. one hand on her hip and the other was holding a drink. 

“we lost you to hot boy #3. and then we lost you again to the corner.” ning added.

you blinked, a little dazed. “just… catching up.”

aeri raised an eyebrow. “with minjeong?”

“she gave me a pep talk.” you said, vague on purpose.

ning grinned. “that sounds fake but okay.”

“is she still in love with karina?” aeri asked bluntly, sipping her drink.

“no? i don’t know!”

they exchanged a look. one of those unspoken ones.

aeri leaned in. “whatever. we need more shots.”

“absolutely. and dancing.” ning added, grabbing your hand.

you hesitated. “i don’t know if—”

“don’t care. you’re wearing lingerie and fake ears, you gotta give into the sluttiness.” aeri said sweetly.

“and. you know she’s watching. has been. not even blinking.” ning sang, already pulling you into the living room.

your stomach flipped. but you didn’t stop them.

the music hit harder as you stepped into the crowd again and ning handed you something you thought was vodka. you downed it with the kind of attitude that came from being halfway in control and halfway over it.

you were laughing, dancing, spinning under lights you didn’t recognize when yeonjun reappeared, hand brushing your waist like he belonged there.

“miss me?” he asked.

you didn’t answer yet.

but you didn’t stop him either. one hand brushed your hip like he had a right to.

“i thought you gave up easy.” you said.

he smiled. “i don’t give up when i want something.”

you rolled your eyes but didn’t move away. the liquor hit harder in your veins and your body swayed, loose and untethered. you let your arms drape around his shoulders. not because he deserved it. but because you knew she was watching.

somewhere in this house. somewhere behind you.

you didn’t need to see her to know. you could feel it. it was like a thread winding tight around your ribs. pulling you in.

yeonjun leaned closer, bold now, mouth near your ear. “you’re gorgeous.”

you laughed. and just before he could speak again, something shifted.

you turned your head slightly, enough to catch her.

karina. at the edge of the room.

she wasn’t leaning. she was moving. her eyes were locked on you and didn’t stray. not once.

you smile twitched.

yeonjun noticed none of it. “come upstairs with me?” he asked.

you looked back at him. “you think I’m that easy?”

“what?”

you stepped back just out of his reach. “sorry. not interested.”

he frowned. “you were just—”

but you were already turning. already walking away. and behind you through the crowd, karina was following. you didn’t rush or run. you wanted her to catch you.

each room you passed, you felt her closer. then a hand caught your wrist.

you stopped, turned, and she was there. 

“don’t do that again.” her voice was low and calm.

“what, dance?”

“flirt with him.”

you tilted your head, feigning innocence. “you weren’t there.”

“i’m always there.” karina stood there, eyes locked on yours. too still. too composed.

you tilted your head, gaze tracing her silhouette. “you gonna keep staring, or were you gonna say something?”

“didn’t want to ruin the show.”

you sipped your drink, letting the music pulse between you. “but you like watching, don’t you?”

karina stepped closer. “only when it’s you.”

a breath caught in your chest but you didn’t let it show. you just rolled your eyes.

“you should be careful.” karina finally murmured, voice almost gentle.

you smiled. “everybody says that.”

“you didn’t listen to them.”

“because i want you, jimin.” you sighed, exasperated. 

you could hear her suck in a breath.

“then let me have you.”

you didn’t let the shiver show. but it was there. “not until you learn how to be honest.”

karina’s expression cracked just for a second. before she could speak, a voice called your name.

you stepped back without looking away.

“come find me later. when you’re ready to stop treating me like something you can keep in your pocket, jimin.”

and then you were gone, slipping back into the crowd.

but karina? she was still standing there. like she just lost something she thought she already owned.

“where have you been?” ning asked, stepping in front of you as soon as you entered the kitchen. you didn’t answer right away. just took the bottle from aeri’s hand and drank straight from it.

“y/n. what happened?” aeri tilted her head, brows furrowed.

“karina happened.” you muttered, tossing the liquor back. the burn was dull and familiar. 

“did yall fuck that quick?” ning widened her eyes. 

you choked slightly on the drink. “what—no!”

“then why do you look like you just got slammed against a wall?” aeri said, tilting her head. 

“she followed me.”

“duh.” ning muttered.

“what did she say?” aeri asked, stepping closer. you could smell the alcohol on her lips. 

“told me not to flirt with yeonjun.”

aeri stared. “that’s it?“

“she said she’s always there.” you muttered, grabbing the bottle again and drinking straight from it.

“the obsession spiral. she’s so back.” ning sighed, fixing your hair. 

you drank again. “i told her no.”

both of them stared.

“i told her she can’t have me unless she learns how to be honest.”

“she might lose it.” aeri said.

“she said ‘let me have you.’ you exhaled, remembering the words.

ning actually put a hand on her chest. “i love when she getd dramatic like that.”

“that ain’t drama, that’s delusion. and the way you walked back in here?” aeri corrected.

“she just looked at me.” you said quietly.

“karina doesn’t… deal with rejection. not from people she wants.”

“and she wants you.” ning said, no teasing this time. but you all knew that.

you stared down into the bottle. “so what do i do?”

aeri shrugged. “the plan still on, isn’t it?”

you looked up at her before shrugging.

“then you need to dance. right now. before she finds you again.” ning said.

you tilted your head back and downed another one. “okay.”

ning grinned while dragging you to the living room. the music thumped louder and you wiped your mouth with the back of your hand.

the moment you began to dance aeri shoved a drink in your hand. ning grabbed the other. you were being moved like a doll, but you didn’t care. it was no different than being with karina.

“she’s watching.” aeri whispered in your ear.

you didn’t have to ask who.

“good.” you muttered, sipping the drink.

“that’s the spirit.” ning spun you into the center of the crowd like it was a runway.

you danced. it wasn’t graceful. it was sloppy, confident, and all hips. you were letting the liquor take over. aeri pressed behind you, light hands on your hips. phones were out and 

for a second, you forgot about karina. you forgot about the way she said “let me have you” like it was a prayer.

ning cackled, slipping another shot into your hand.

“i think i’m already drunk.” you said. but you threw it back anyway.

you turned your head and there she was. she was across the room with her back to the wall, arms crossed, eyes locked on you. cold and possessive.

you smiled at her.

“she looks like she’s gonna murder me.” you muttered.

“she wouldn’t. you’re her favorite toy.” ning shrugged.

another shot. you lost count.

someone grabbed your hand. you danced harder.

karina was still watching you like she wanted to kill you. or kiss you. or maybe both.

you blinked up at ning. “i think i’m gonna throw up.”

“nah. you’ll be fine.” ning said.

“she’s coming.” aeri whispered.

you didn’t look.

“what do i do?”

“let her suffer. that’s the plan, right?” ning said. it wasn’t. 

but you laughed anyway. loud and drunk.

karina took one step forward. you took two back into aeri’s arms before continuing to dance. 

and when you felt a firm grip on your wrist, you knew it was karina. it wasn’t painful, but it was enough to remind you that she wasn’t asking.

you didn’t fight her. you were too dizzy. too tired. too done.

she pulled you through the house like a thread, past rooms full of people, eyes flicking towards you with quiet curiosity. a drunk girl was being dragged off by her maybe girlfriend. or maybe not.

the moment the door shut behind you, karina finally let go.

“you’re drunk.”

you laughed. “really?”

karina didn’t laugh back. she stepped forward, arms crossed and jaw tense. her expression was unreadable.

“you shouldn’t be drinking like that.”

“you shouldn’t be controlling.”

her lip twitched. “i’m not trying to control you.”

“bullshit.”

“y/n—”

“don’t ‘y/n’ me. can you just be honest? just for once? if you were honest and did this the right way, then we wouldn’t even be here.” you snapped, stepping back.

karina stood across from you, chest rising and falling. the room was too quiet, and the bass from the party outside thudded faintly through the walls.

“you’re drunk. you’re not thinking straight.” she said again, quieter this time.

“stop using that as an excuse. i’m drunk, not stupid.” you dragged your hands down your face. “god, you’re so hot it actually pisses me off.”

karina stared. “what?”

“you— you walk around acting like you don’t actually care and everyone’s telling me not to fall for it but then say shit like ‘let me have you’ and stalk me around parties and get all possessive. like— i don’t know what’s real.”

“it’s all real. everything i’ve said. everything i’ve done.” she said, stepping closer. her voice dropped, softer now. 

you laughed bitterly. “even the controlling part?”

“i’m not controlling—”

“you are. you want me close but only on your terms. you get jealous, you get weird when i talk to other people, you talk like i belong to you, karina.”

she didn’t deny it. she just stared at you, expression unreadable.

“i just want honesty. even if it sucks. even if it hurts. stop trying to play me.” you said, voice softer now.

“i’m not playing you. but you want honesty?” she paused. “then let’s be honest.”

you watched her warily.

“my mom told me. about the transfer.” she said.

your stomach turned.

“she said your dad’s affair got out. that your mom wants a fresh start. how quick they pulled you out.”

the silence that followed was suffocating.

your throat burned. “you had no right—”

“she’s the counselor, y/n.”

“yeah? and you had no right to use that against me. i don't have to tell you everything.” you backed up, bumping into the velvet chair behind you. “what, you’re just gonna throw my worst moment at me when you’re losing control?”

“i’m not trying to win or lose—”

“yes you are!” you raised your voice. “you always are. this is a game to you. a way to get people to obey you.”

karina’s jaw clenched. “no. you’re different.”

“then treat me like i’m different! you keep saying that but all i get is secrecy and obsession and manipulation. and— i think i like it. fuck, i think i like you so much it’s fucking me up, but i can’t keep doing this if you won’t give me anything real.”

the silence stretched long in between you. karina didn’t move.

“i could be good for you. if you let me.” she said, almost in a whisper.

you exhaled. “i don’t want the version of you you think i want. i want the real you. even if it’s ugly. even if you’re scared. i don’t want to be someone you collect and protect and keep quiet. i want to matter.”

“you do matter. that’s why i’m trying so hard.” karina said.

“then stop using what you know to control me. stop hovering. stop acting like knowing me means owning me.”

she scoffed. “i only know because i care.”

“and i’m telling you right now— you’re gonna lose me if you keep going like this.”

she didn’t respond.

“it’s been a month of being dragged, watched, and decoded like i’m just a new file in your brain. don’t you think i’m tired?”

and then quieter, you added. “i’m not yujin.”

karina froze.

your voice trembled. “i don’t care who she was. but i’m not her. you don’t get to rewrite what you lost with someone else through me.”

she stepped forward again, slower now. “i know.”

“do you?”

“i do. you’re not her. you’re you.” she said.

you shook your head. “then let me be me.”

“i keep trying to convince myself you’re just intense. that this is just your form of affection.” you said slowly, eyes on her. she stayed quiet.

“but sometimes i look at you and it’s like you already know how this ends. like you already planned ten steps ahead of me.”

her silence was confirmation.

“and that scares me.” you admitted quietly.

karina’s eyes flickered with shame, maybe. or guilt. or something colder underneath. the calculation that she always tried to hide behind softness.

“i didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“maybe not. but you did. you treat me like a replacement for whatever you lost.”

karina swallowed. “i never wanted that.”

“then why do i feel like i’m being studied?”

she took a step forward and you took one back.

“don’t. not this time.” you said.

her head tilted. “then would you rather i ignored you? like your parents did? like your friends did back home when everything fell apart?”

you froze.

that was a low blow. and she knew it.

she saw it in your face. and still, she didn’t take it back. she only stepped closer.

“i’m the only one who’s seen the whole you and stayed. doesn’t that mean something?”

you stared at her. “you’re not staying. you’re watching. waiting to see how i break so you can catch the pieces before anyone else.”

her lip twitched like she wanted to deny it. but she couldn’t.

“i didn’t ask for this. i didn’t ask for the secrets or the way you make me feel insane or the fact that i still want you even when i know i shouldn’t.”

she moved again. you didn’t.

“you still haven’t told me the truth about yujin. about what happened. why you can’t let go.”

“i didn’t want to scare you.”

“you already did.”

the words hung between you, heavier than anything else.

karina’s voice dropped. “you think i’m too much now. but you didn’t seem scared when you kissed me. or when you stayed the night. or when you begged me not to stop touching you.”

you flinched.

she stepped even closer, now inches from you. “you weren’t scared then. you liked it. you liked being known.”

“don’t twist this.” you whispered.

“i’m not. you’re the one running because i care in other ways people can’t.” she said. 

“that’s not love, karina. that’s control.” you said, backing away.

“you call it control.”

you almost laughed. “karina. you’re on your own planet.”

but she didn’t answer. instead, she stepped forward. and then, without warning or hesitation, dropped to her knees.

you froze.

“karina.”

she looked up at you from the floor, eyes locked on yours like you were the only thing keeping her down to earth.

she didn’t look pathetic. she looked intentional. poised. like she thought about this before. she didn’t reach for you right away. just stared up, head tilted slightly like she was memorizing you from this angle. her eyes were clear. soft in a way that made your throat burn.

“you scare me.” she admitted, voice barely above a whisper. “the way you see me. the way you make me want to be different.”

you hated how that made you pause. how it made you ache.

“i know i come off cold. calculated. maybe i am. maybe that’s what happens when you already lost someone once and promised yourself you’d never feel that again. but you—” she looked up, slowly. “you make me feel like i don’t have to be that version of myself.”

you looked away, afraid of what was happening to your resolve.

“i don’t want to own you,” she said and her voice cracked just slightly. “i just want to keep you. to protect the only thing that’s made me feel real again.”

god. she was good.

you wanted to believe her. you almost did.

“karina…” your voice trembled. “i don’t know if you’re saying this because it’s true, or because you know i’ll stay if you do.”

her smile was sad and quiet. “maybe both.”

and somehow, that honesty hurt the most.

she reached up slowly. her fingers ghosted over your wrist like she was asking for permission without words. you didn’t pull away.

“don’t leave.” she said it so quietly that it cracked something in you.

you swallowed. her hands moved slowly, reaching for yours like they were something sacred. she waited, and when you didn’t stop her, she slid her fingers over your palm, lifting it gently. her lips pressed against the back of your hand, soft and slow, lingering like she didn’t want to let go. 

and for a moment, you almost faltered. you almost fell again. that was how she worked, sweet enough to confuse you, but sharp enough to keep you in check.

but before you could respond —

knock knock.

the door creaked. “yo.” ning’s voice cut in. too casual. “am i interrupting… something?”

you stepped back instantly. like you had woken up.

karina didn’t even turn to look. “leave.”

“okay damn.” ning’s voice faded as the door shut again.

but the moment had cracked. fractured in the way that all glass eventually does.

“i have to go.” you said, your voice small.

karina stood slowly, no longer trying to stop you. but she didn’t look surprised. only calm again. composed. a little sad. which made it harder to leave. her silence was the cruelest part.

but you did anyway. and your hands were already shaking as you texted minjeong.

you woke up slow. heavy. like the night before had pressed its whole body against you and never really left.

there was sunlight pouring in through the curtains, soft and too gentle for how you felt. the sheets were warm and unfamiliar  but they didn’t smell like her.

your throat was dry. your head was pounding. your chest? worse.

because it remembered everything.

you laid there for a long time in the quiet. wrapped in the comfort of someone else’s house and the ache of your own mistakes.

minjeong’s guest bed. in her extra blanket.

not karina’s arms. not karina’s bed. not karina.

you hated that that mattered.

the scent of lavender came from the pillow. there was a water glass beside the bed, half full, and two advil on a folded napkin. 

your phone buzzed under your pillow. you ignored her.

your body still remembered her. the grip. the way she’d looked at you like you were the most infuriating thing she had ever wanted.

you rolled onto your back, staring up at the ceiling. your body ached in strange places—your temples, your chest, the hollow spot behind your ribs where her voice used to echo.

you didn’t know what time it was. you didn’t care. you just existed in the hangover and the heat of her memory.

then the buzz came again. 6 texts. 2 missed calls. 1 voice message.

none from her.

but you opened it anyway. 

ning

ummmm she ended the party

literally pulled the aux mid song.

likeee everyone out

no yelling n no emotion

your chest tightened.

aeri

girl when i say SCARY…

haven’t seen her like that since the thing with yujin

she didn’t even say ur name but we all knew

the blood drained from your face.

aeri

she went upstairs after

didn’t even look at anyone

you stared at your phone. you knew she was upstairs probably replaying every word you said. probably memorizing the exact angle you looked at her when you told her she was controlling. probably blaming herself. probably blaming you more.

you imagined her sitting on her bed, scrolling through something that reminded her of you. or maybe nothing at all.

you could still hear it from last night:

“you weren’t scared then. you liked it. you liked being known.”

and fuck, maybe you did.

maybe that was the worst part. that she looked at you like she already knew how this ended. that she kissed you like she built the ending to your story herself.

“morning.” minjeong’s voice came soft from the doorway.

you turned your head but didn’t speak. she walked in, still in sweats while holding a mug of tea.

“i thought you might need something warm.”

you didn’t answer. just reached for it with a quiet nod. 

she sat beside you, watching the way your hand curled around the mug.

“you look like you’ve seen a ghost.” she said.

you laughed under your breath. “i think i might’ve dated one.”

minjeong tilted her head. “you didn’t date her.”

“i know. she ended the party. didnt say anything. she’s probably not even mad.”

“she’s probably hurting. in her own twisted way.” minjeong said. you finished the tea, feeling your body start to thaw.

you finished the tea in a few gulps. “she always been like this?” you asked.

minjeong leaned back, stretching her legs out beside the bed. “kind of. not always in the scary way. back when we were freshmen, she was… a lot more normal. we were close.” you glanced at her, the word close sticking.

“you know she was captain of the volleyball team. people liked her, but it wasn’t… like now. she was just kind of cool and serious and good at stuff. intimidating, sure, but not on purpose. she laughed more.”

minjeong smiled faintly at the memory. “sophomore year, she bleached her hair and suddenly half the school had a crush on her. everyone started looking at her different. like she was untouchable. even the teachers. i think she liked it.”

you tilted your head. “what about you?”

minjeong shrugged. “i liked her before that. when she still let herself be soft. when it wasn’t all about control. i guess i just fell into it? she used to let me hang around after practice. we would talk. sometimes she would drive me home. it wasn’t anything, but at the time it felt like everything.” you nodded slowly.

“i think i mistook her attention for affection. but karina gives her attention very… strategically. and you start bending around it.” 

“she hurt her shoulder junior year and stopped playing. she didn’t tell anyone at first. i found out, told jiwon, and i guess she figured out eventually.” minjeong continued.

“that’s why you guys stopped talking?” you asked, quietly.

“yeah. she doesn’t handle that very well.” she said, voice low. but you knew that. 

“but hey. i got a text from jiwon.” minjeong changed the subject, making your ears perk up. “she said that her parents couldn’t afford the cost anymore.”

“just like that?”

“yeah. she’s already packed and ready to leave wednesday.” there was a pass of silence between you two.

“she got on her knees.”

minjeong looked at you. “what?”

you stared out at the grass. “last night. when i told her she was controlling.”

you took a slow breath, unsteady. “she just… dropped. right there. like it wasn’t a performance. like it was a decision. like she knew what she was doing and still wanted me to see her that way.” minjeong was quiet.

“she didn’t touch me, not at first.” you said. “just looked up at me like… i don’t know.” your voice cracked a little. “and then she reached for my hand.”

minjeong nodded for you to go on, eyes careful. “she kissed it. twice. once like she needed to remember me. and then again like she wanted me to forget everything else.”

“and the way she said things… like she wasn’t trying to win me over. just trying not to lose me. she told me i scare her.” you let out a breathy laugh, bitter. “me. like i’m the one with power.”

minjeong looked down, biting the inside of her cheek.

“she said i made her want to change.” you said softly. “but it felt like a test. like she wanted me to forgive her just because she knew how to sound honest.”

you stared down at your hands. they still felt like hers.

“then ning came in.” you added, voice distant. “door cracked open like a fucking movie scene. she saw us and dipped so fast.”

“and you left.” minjeong finished for you.

you nodded. “i told her i had to go. she didn’t even stop me.” your eyes stung.

“i still wanted to stay.” you admitted. “i think that’s the worst part.”

minjeong looked at you then, eyes soft but firm. “no it isn’t.” 

“it makes me hers.”

“don’t go back. not yet." she said.

you leaned into her shoulder just slightly. and this time, when your phone buzzed, you didn’t look.

the second you stepped in the school building, you felt it.

that weird tension that came when something major happened and the walls were still pretending nothing changed.

students were moving around like normal, laughing, running to class, shoving lockers shut, but everything felt too loud. and then you saw her.

karina was leaning against the lockers, phone in hand. she was standing between ning and aeri like nothing had happened. like she didn’t look you in the eye three nights ago and say things you can’t unhear. like she didn’t ask you not to leave her, and then let you walk away anyway.

you didn’t even get a glance. not a twitch. not a blink in your direction. just her mouth curling at something that ning said. her arms crossing in that familiar way, eyes locked on anything but you. you slowed down.

“don’t.” minjeong said softly, already seeing the shift in your face.

you turned towards her like you haven’t been staring. “what?”

she looked at you for a second too long. then she opened the front door, holding it long enough for you to pass through. the main hallway hit you with a mix of perfume and the citrus floor cleaner the janitors used.

you barely noticed. you were still focused on karina. “she’s pretending like i don’t exist. did you see that?” you muttered once you were both inside.

minjeong walked in step beside you, adjusting her backpack like she was trying to stay casual. “i saw it.”

you passed a group of juniors huddled by the vending machines. someone laughed too loud and your stomach flipped.

“she didn’t even acknowledge me.”

“she’s doing what she thinks keeps her in control. that’s kind of her whole thing.” minjeong said, glancing sideways at you.

you kept walking towards your locker, not really focused on where your feet were taking you. “well it’s working. i feel like i got erased.”

minjeong sighed. “how do you actually feel?”

you leaned against your locker, the cold metal grounding you. “like i miss her. which is stupid.”

“it’s not stupid.”

“i thought that she really liked me. and now she won’t even look at me.”

minjeong gave you a long, quiet look. students passed around you, some bumping shoulders, some glancing curiously. but you didn’t care.

“she does. that’s the problem.”

you swallowed hard. then you opened your locker with shaking hands. 

“she’s just not good at liking people in a… normal way.” minjeong added softly.

you didn’t respond. you couldn’t. because she was right. and you still wanted to be destroyed. 

you weren’t ready for first period. you told yourself that you were, that you could do this — that it was just another class, just another morning, just another girl.

but it wasn’t. not when the girl was her.

you stepped through the classroom door like you didn’t spend the walk building yourself back up from the pieces she left you in. like you weren’t still thinking about friday. 

you looked up — and there she was.

karina.

already seated, back straight, posture perfect, like always. she was angled toward the window, sunlight catching the edge of her cheekbone, making her look carved from marble. her expression was calm and composed. bored even. her fingers tapped against her notebook, idle and distracted.

she looked like someone who had never broken.

who had never begged.

who didn’t kiss you like you were air and she was drowning in an endless sea.

and that was when the first crack formed in your chest.

you slowed your steps. something in you was still hoping that she’d feel you. tbat she’d turn. that some invisible thread between you might tug hard enough to make her look.

she didn’t. not even a flicker. just stayed there, perfectly still, like you were nothing more than another body passing by.

you took your seat beside her — the same seat you filled for weeks now, the one she used to glance at before class, used to lean toward mid lecture, and used to brush her fingers against like it was an accident.

now? nothing. she didn’t shift away from you. but she didn’t acknowledge you either. and that absence was worse than if she’d flinched. 

you glanced at her hands. you wanted to speak. you wanted to say her name. to whisper it the way she used to whisper yours when no one else was listening.

so you did. quietly. barely.

“karina.” she didn’t move. didn’t blink. didn’t even breathe differently. you felt your stomach drop. like something sacred had been lost. you said her name again. a little louder this time. like maybe she didn’t hear you. like maybe this was all just a misunderstanding.

still — nothing.

you sat there, hands folded in your lap, chest aching in that awful, familiar way. the one that doesn’t come from heartbreak, but from the silence that follows it. the teacher started talking. something about metaphor. something about illusions. something about how language can hide pain. it was almost funny. like the universe was in on the joke now.

you didn’t take notes. you just stared down at your paper, eyes unfocused, hands still. the urge to cry was heavy behind your eyes, but you didn’t let it win.

not here. and especially not next to her. not when she wouldn’t even give you the decency of a glance. your throat felt tight.

you turned your head just slightly, enough to see her in your peripheral. her mouth twitched at something the teacher said. the little smirk that was always on her face when she caught an inside joke that the rest of the class missed. you stared at her profile, memorizing it all over again. the sharpness of her jaw, the way her lashes curled slightly up at the ends, the way her lip twitched when she was holding something back.

but you didn’t know what she was holding back now. you didn’t even know if she cared anymore. maybe she never did. maybe she did too much.

god, you missed her. missed her so much you wanted to scream. but instead you sat there, painfully still, biting the inside of your cheek just to feel something that wasn’t her absence.

halfway through the class, your leg brushed hers. just barely. not enough to matter. not enough to be anything but coincidence.

but still. your heart stopped. but she didn’t move. she didn’t shift. she didn’t do anything. and that was the cruelest part. because even her nothing felt like a decision.

when the bell rang, you jolted. you looked at her before she could stand, desperate just for a moment. for something. for a glance. for a word. for proof that this wasn’t a dream.

she stood up, packed up, and walked away. no hesitation and no goodbye.

the second you stepped out of the classroom, you let out a breath that you didn’t even know you were holding. your heart had been holding out for a glance, a twitch, any sign — and you got absolutely nothing.

it was forty eight minutes of pretending you weren’t sitting right beside her. forty eight minutes of her not looking at you, not speaking to you, and not even acknowledging you existed in the same dimension.

and still. still, you found yourself staring at the way her fingers tapped the edge of her notebook. the way she pushed her hair behind her ear when she was focusing. you could practically recreate the sound of her sigh when she was bored. you hated how you noticed all of it. but you hated even more how you missed it.

you didn’t even realize you stopped walking until minjeong showed up beside you, sliding into your space like she had been watching you the whole time.

“you okay?” she asked.

you blinked like you were just waking up from a long sleep. “no.”

minjeong nodded once and leaned against the lockers. “she didn’t say a word. she didn’t even look at me. like i was never there.” you muttered, leaning beside her.

“she’s the goat at acting unbothered. it’s how she wins.” minjeong said, standing beside you with her arms crossed.

you scoffed. “well congrats to her. she’s winning.”

“i shouldn’t care this much. i really shouldn’t.” you said suddenly.

“maybe not. but you do.” minjeong said.

“i feel pathetic. i know she’s manipulative. i know she plays games. i know she’s probably never been in something real and i’m stupid for thinking it was.”

“i—“

“and i still want her.” minjeong hesitated, then nodded like she expected that answer. “i know.”

“it’s so dumb, right?” you laughed. “like, she’s probably already moved on. she has ning and aeri and her whole little kingdom and i’m over here acting like i just got ghosted by the girl i thought i’d get married to.”

minjeong turned fully to face you. “you’re not dumb. she’ll come back.” she said quietly.

“she already left.” before minjeong could respond, the classroom door behind you swung open. karina stepped out with her head high and face unreadable. she didn’t even scan the hallway. like she already knew exactly who was watching.

ning and aeri somehow followed behind. aeri was fixing her lip gloss in the reflection of the fire extinguisher case and ning said something that made karina smile. just barely.

you stood straighter before you could stop yourself and karina walked right toward you. your heart thudded. and then— 

she brushed past minjeong’s shoulder. it wasn’t hard, but it wasn’t subtle either. minjeong went rigid beside you. you just froze.

karina didn’t even glance at you. didnt slow down either. just kept walking. “wow.” you whispered. minjeong exhaled slowly, eyes on karina’s back. “she’s annoying.”

you didn’t say anything. because you were too busy thinking about how the smell of her perfume still lingered in the air like a ghost.

“don’t say it.” minjeong warned but it was too late.

“i still want her.”

minjeong looked at you like she wanted to throw something — but then her face softened. “okay. then we’ll figure it out. together.” you looked down the hallway again.

you knew better. but you still wanted her anyway. and that was the worst part.

  ──────────౨ৎ───────────

lunch felt like detention. you and minjeong sat at her usual table near the back where the sunlight filtered through the trees and made everything feel a little too pretty for how awful your insides felt.

your tray was untouched. you picked at your food but mostly just peeled the label off your water bottle.  minjeong was halfway through a fruit cup, watching you like you were going to die at any moment.

“okay.” she said finally, chewing slow. “what’s going on in that head of yours?” you didn’t answer right away. just stared out across the lawn where karina sat with ning and aeri. she had her sunglasses pushed up on her head and was sipping from a little matcha bottle. 

you wanted to scream. or cry. or maybe just lie down with your face in the grass.

instead, you spoke. “i want to talk to her.”

minjeong paused mid bite. “no.”

“just for a second.”

“no.”

“i just want to—”

“no.”

you tore your eyes away from karina to look at her. “you don’t even know what i was gonna say.”

“you were gonna walk over there and say something stupid like ‘can we talk?’ or ‘was any of it real?’ or ‘why are you acting like i’m invisible?’ and then she was gonna stare up at you with those bambi eyes and say something cryptic that makes you feel like you’re insane.”

you stared. “okay, that’s… exactly what I was gonna do.”

“i know.” minjeong muttered. “because i did it. twice. and both times i ended up crying in the art room and texting my ex from eighth grade.” you dropped your head onto your folded arms and groaned into your hoodie sleeve. “why is she like this?”

“because she doesn’t know how to just like someone.” you turned your head to look at her. “it’s not even that i want her to explain. i just— i don’t know. i just want her to look at me. like i matter. like i’m not some phase she already grew out of.”

minjeong’s face softened. “you do matter.”

“not to her.”

“that’s not true.”

“the  why hasn’t she said anything? why is she pretending i don’t exist?”

minjeong looked down at her tray for a second. “because she’s scared.”

“of what? me? i’m literally the one crying into my lunch.”

“she’s scared that if she looks at you, it’ll undo her. and she’s spent years building a version of herself that doesn’t fall apart for anyone.”

gou sat back up, arms wrapped around yourself. “so what? i’m just supposed to sit here and wait for her to be brave?”

“i’m not saying wait. i’m saying… don’t walk into the lion’s den. with raw meat.”

you frowned. “what if i don’t care anymore? what if i’d rather be hurt than ignored?”

minjeong shook her head slowly. “that’s not power, y/n. that’s a slow motion heartbreak.”

you didn’t respond. your eyes wandered again, almost involuntarily, back to karina. she was laughing at something that aeri said. her hand rested loosely on her knee. she hasn’t looked your way once.

“i miss her so much i feel sick.” you whispered.

“i know.”

you didn’t speak for a while after that. the wind moved gently through the trees, scattering cherry blossom petals onto your table.

“i think she misses you too.” minjeong added after a long pause.

you looked at her. “then why won’t she say it?”

“because if she does, she’ll have to admit she messed up. and yu jimin doesn’t apologize. she rewrites the narrative.”

you pressed your lips together. “i want her to miss me. but not like this.” you said.

minjeong reached across the table and squeezed your hand. “remember. don’t go to her yet.”

you hesitated. swallowed down everything desperate sitting in your throat.

“okay.” you whispered.

but when karina stood up a minute later, tossing her hair back and laughing at something that ning said, your eyes followed her all the way across the courtyard.

and when she didn’t look back? it hurt anyway.

the day dragged. it felt like being underwater. every class was a blur of muffled voices and moving people, and you were just floating through it. you kept checking your phone even though you knew there’d be nothing from her.

you were used to the intensity. the eye contact that burned, the touches that lingered, the possessive glances from across the room. even when she was being cold, it was calculated. a push and pull. a game.

but now it was absence. silence so loud that it made you ache. she hasn’t looked at you once. not in the hallways. not in any period. not when she passed by your locker with aeri, close enough that you could smell her perfume.

not once.

you caught yourself turning around too quick when you thought you heard her laugh. you stopped breathing every time someone said her name in passing. you wanted to hate her. but really, you just miss her.

by the time the final bell rang, your chest felt hollow.

you stayed in your seat after class, pretending to dig through your backpack just so you wouldn’t have to walk into the hallway crowd yet. just so you wouldn’t have to see her leaving without even looking back. again.

eventually, you forced yourself up and wandered down the hall with your head low and hoodie up. your phone buzzed once in your pocket, but it was nothing that mattered.

minjeong found you by the benches out front, sitting on the concrete with your arms around your knees like a sulking child. she didn’t say anything at first. just plopped down beside you with a loud sigh.

“is she still pretending you’re air?” you nodded. the two of you sat in silence for a while, watching cars pull in and students walk out. the sky was starting to go gold at the edges, the sun bleeding into soft pink. you used to love this hour. now it just made your stomach hurt.

“i thought maybe she would chase me. or at least try.” you admitted. “she will. but only when she realizes she doesn’t know how to win without you.” minjeong said.

you swallowed. “and what if she doesn’t?”

“then that’s not someone you want to spend your heart on.”

that sentence settled between you both. it was heavy and real. you nodded slowly. “okay.”

minjeong stood up and held out her hand. “come on. let’s get food before you start crying.”

you let her pull you up. you didn’t feel better. not really. but at least you weren’t sitting alone anymore. at least someone still looked at you like you mattered. you take one last glance toward the student lot. karina wasn’t there.

she left without you. again. and it still hurt. even though you knew it would.

two days. forty eight hours. one hundred and forty four thousand seconds. you weren’t counting or anything. it was terrifying how quickly pain could become routine. you walked into school with minjeong like nothing was wrong. like it was just another day. like the ghost of someone you used to mean something to wasn’t standing ten feet away, laughing at something ning whispered to her.

the worst part? you were still trying to get her attention.

you shouldn’t have put this outfit on. you told yourself that like three times in the mirror before leaving the house. you told yourself that it didn’t matter. that she wouldn’t care. that she wouldn’t look.

but you still wore it. your top was a little shorter than usual, hem brushing just above your waistband. your hair was done and you even had on makeup. it wasn’t full revenge dress level, but it was enough to make your pulse quicken when you walked past a window.

minjeong didn’t say anything at first when she saw you that morning. she just raised an eyebrow. “you tryna be subtle, or…?”

“shut up. i didn’t even think about it.” you muttered, cheeks already warning. she gave you a look. “mhm.”

karina looked good. of course she did. she always did when you didn’t want her to.

minjeong’s hand brushed yours as you froze halfway through the doorway. “keep walking.”

“i wasn’t gonna stop.” you muttered but your voice sounded fragile.

“uh huh.”

you forced your feet to move.

“she didn’t look at me.” you said once you passed by, low enough that only minjeong could hear.

“she hasn’t looked at you in two days.” she replied. it wasn’t unkind. 

“yeah. well… it still sucks.”

minjeong didn’t say anything for a moment. you could feel her glancing at you sideways, but you didn’t meet her eyes.

minjeong finally spoke, voice softer now. “you know this isn’t really about you, right?”

“what?”

“she’s not ignoring you because you did something wrong. well— i know for a fact she’s ignoring you because she’s trying not to fall apart in front of you.”

“then why does she look so fine?” you snapped, louder than you meant to.

a freshman walking by gave you a weird look. you bit your tongue.

minjeong touched your arm gently. “because that’s her thing. she controls the narrative.”

you stopped at your locker. “well she’s doing a damn good job.”

“she’s watching you, you know. she just waits until you’re not looking.”

you laughed bitterly. “i am looking. constantly.”

minjeong smiled. “i know.”

you didn’t say anything. you just leaned your forehead against the locker, trying not to feel every emotion pressing against your body.

“she’s ignoring me like i never meant anything. i feel invisible.”

minjeong’s voice dropped. “you’re not.” you pulled your books out and closed the locker too fast. the bang made you flinch.

“i just want her to talk to me. even if it’s just to say she hates me for walking away.” you said quietly, but minjeong didn’t respond. you walked toward first period with the girl you couldn’t stop chasing ignoring you like it was her job.

  ──────────౨ৎ───────────

first period was the same as yesterday. 

you wanted her to look at you so bad it hurt. you wanted her to lean over and whisper some sarcastic comment under her breath. you wanted her to bump your shoulder again and let it linger. you wanted anything. but she gave you nothing.

and when the bell finally rang, she stood up smooth and fast, like she was escaping a crime scene or something. she walked out without a single glance back. and you sat there wondering how the hell you were supposed to keep surviving this.

you didn’t even wait for the bell to stop echoing. the second the door opened, you were on your feet, grabbing your bag and slipping into the hallway like you could outrun the ache sitting in your chest.

but of course minjeong was already waiting outside, leaning against the wall with her arms crossed and that quiet concern all over her face.

you didn’t even say anything. just walked straight into her side and sighed so hard it felt like your lungs gave up. she straightened a little. “that bad?”

you blinked at the ceiling. “she didn’t even blink.” minjeong nodded slowly then nudged your elbow. “wanna walk?”

you did. so you walked, blending into the current of students flowing through the hallway. you were pretending your stomach wasn’t doing somersaults every time someone passed by who even vaguely looked like her. it was stupid. but everything felt kind of stupid now.

you cleared your throat. “i’m even starting to miss ning and aeri.” minjeong laughed. “you hated ning. she scared the hell out of you.”

“she still does. but at least she talked to me.” you said. minjeong raised her eyebrows like she was trying not to laugh again. “talked to you or tormented you?”

you cracked a weak smile. “same difference.” there was a moment of silence for a while before you spoke again. “i don’t know. i just… i miss them. like, their weird dynamic. the whole table. it was dramatic and terrifying, but it felt like something. and now it’s just gone.”

“because karina made herself the center of it. and she’s decided to disappear, so that means everyone around her does too.” minjeong said. you didn’t respond. you couldn’t. because she was right.

karina wasn’t just ignoring you. she was deleting herself. from your days, your space, and your routine. like she was trying to leave a karina shaped hole behind just to see how long it would take you to collapse into it. and it was working.

the warning bell rang and you both slowed in front of your lockers. minjeong opened hers and looked over at you. “do you wanna skip lunch? just us. outside. behind the gym or something.” you looked down the hallway.

somewhere, karina was laughing at something ning said. walking too close with aeri. replacing you like it was nothing. and still, some part of you wanted to chase her down the hall and just ask her why.

“no. i think i wanna be here she can see me.” you said. minjeong looked at you for a second. “you sure?”

“no.” you admitted. but part of you still had hope. 

but now, walking into the cafeteria beside her, that hope felt heavier. especially when you caught sight of them. her table. karina was already there, leaning back in her seat like she owned the air. one arm was hanging lazily across the backrest, fingers tapping against the table in some rhythm. ning was mid story like always. karina didn’t look at you. but ning did.

her eyes flicked over your outfit, brows rising with an amused kinda interest. she leaned toward karina to say something, and you saw karina’s fingers still for half a second. her jaw twitched. but she didn’t turn. she didn’t look. you hated that it still got to you.

“she saw you.” minjeong said under her breath, walking just a step behind you now. “she didn’t.”

“she did. i know her. she noticed you the second you walked in.” minjeong insisted. you kept your eyes on the empty table near the windows. “then why won’t she look?”

“because looking at you would mean admitting you still have that effect.” you didn’t respond. just sank into the seat and tried not to look back. tried not to give in to that aching part of you that wanted to know if karina was still leaning back or if she had shifted forward. if her arms were still folded or if she crossed her legs like she always did when something made her tense.

you picked at the edge of your tray, your food untouched. minjeong watched you for a long moment before sighing. “y/n.”

“what?”

“you look hot. like hot hot.” you stared. “okay?”

“and you’re sitting here acting like the world ended.” you cracked a small smile. “it kind of did.”

minjeong didn’t answer. but a moment later, her foot tapped yours under the table.

“she’s gonna break. i don’t know when, but she will.” she said. you nodded like you believed her but your eyes drifted back towards karina anyway. just for a second. that was enough. because she still wasn’t looking. and you still couldn’t stop hoping she would.

lunch went on without her. without them. without ning’s loud laugh echoing off the walls or aeri’s sarcastic commentary. without karina’s voice saying your name like it was always supposed to be hers. you hated that you noticed the difference. that the silence at your table felt too huge in contrast. you hated that you were still hoping she would look over.

you saw karina shift in your peripheral. she was standing now. her tray was picked up and ning was still talking while aeri followed behind. karina walked slowly as if she had all the time in the world. as if you weren’t holding your breath without meaning to.

she passed by your table. and for a second — a millisecond — her shoulder barely angled toward you. you could’ve sworn that she hesitated. that her fingers clenched around the tray just slightly. but she didn’t stop. didn’t look. minjeong kicked you lightly under the table. “you okay?”

“i’m fine.” you whispered. you weren’t.

you waited five more minutes after they left before standing up, pretending to throw your trash away. minjeong followed and you both drifted towards the side hallway that led to the vending machines. and that’s where it happened. you turned the corner too fast. so did she. 

karina. it was just you and her. 

she froze a step too late, nearly walking straight into you. her tray was gone now. she had a bottle of water in her hand and a blank expression on her face, but her eyes finally landed on yours for the first time in days and everything stopped.

you felt your heart slam hard against your chest, like it forgot how to beat without her. like you weren’t just pretending to be okay minutes ago.

she didn’t say anything. but you didn’t either. you could hear minjeong’s footsteps slow behind you, like she was giving you space but not too much.

karina looked at you. not past you. not around you. at you. and you, pathetic, hopeful, and still down bad, looked right back. it was silent between you two. you opened your mouth, not even knowing what to say but just knowing that you needed to say something.

but she was already moving again. her shoulder passed yours like nothing happened and her perfume hit a moment later.

you didn’t turn around. minjeong caught up, her voice low. “y/n…” you just shook your head, barely breathing. “i’m fine.” you weren’t.

you stood there for a few seconds longer, staring down the hallway. “i literally can’t take another day of this.”

the final bell rang like an afterthought. you didn’t move at first. you just sat there, staring at the front of the classroom as people scraped chairs and zipped backpacks and sprinted into the hallway with that end of day energy. it all felt far away, like you were watching a movie of your own life, stuck in the scene where nothing really happens. minjeong gave your arm a light nudge. “you good?”

you nodded, too quickly. “yeah. yeah, i’m fine.” you stood up, legs a little too heavy, spending the entire day dragging around a version of yourself. one that still thought karina might look your way. one that still thought maybe you would brush hands in the hallway. or maybe that she would stop pretending. she didn’t.

not during first period, not in the hallway, and not at lunch — especially not at lunch when you almost walked straight into her and she barely blinked. and still, your heart jumped at the memory.

you hated how badly you wanted her attention. how you still checked the hallways for her. how you still remembered exactly how she looked leaning against your locker two weeks ago like she owned the air you breathed. now she didn’t even want to share it with you.

the walk through the hall felt slower than usual. you followed minjeong silently, walking on your usual route home until you both ended up outside on the bleachers behind the school. it was quiet out there.

you dropped your bag and sat down while minjeong sat beside you, breaking the silence first. “she’s trying so hard not to break. but she’s close. i’ve seen her like this before.” you hugged your knees to your chest. “why is she even doing this? i’m the one who should be mad.”

“she’s scared.” minjeong shrugged. “scared that she let you in and showed you too much.” you went quiet. then you let out a quiet, bitter laugh.

“you warned me.”

“i did. but i also get it in a way.” she said gently. suddenly, you felt stupid for expecting it to be easier for you.

“you think she ever really meant it?” you asked. “all of it? the way she held my hand and the late night texts. the stuff she said on the rooftop…” minjeong was quiet again. then she nodded. “i think she meant every word. i also think she’s terrified of meaning anything. so when it gets too real, she either pulls you in harder or pushes you away.” she added.

you swallowed the lump in your throat. “feels like she chose the second one.”

minjeong nudged her shoulder against yours. “she always chooses both. just never at the same time.” you didn’t respond. because even if that was true, it still wasn’t enough. you were still waiting for her to prove it.

you were so tired. not just sleepy tired. not just i stayed up too late tired either. you felt like your body was dragging itself through the morning on autopilot while your mind somewhere far behind. you barely remembered what you picked to wear. just that it was comfortable. not cute. not for her.

you made it through your front door and into the school building without looking around. no scanning the halls. no pausing at the entrance to see who was by the lockers. you didn’t want to see her today. well maybe you did, but not like this. not with your heart willingly cracked open and your face obviously drained.

minjeong found you by your locker. she didn’t say anything at first. just leaned beside you. “did you sleep?” she asked eventually, quiet enough that only you could hear. you shook your head in response. “kinda. not really.” minjeong studied your face. “you look like you’ve been thinking too hard.”

“i’ve been trying not to think about her.” you muttered. “i’m not even mad anymore. i just miss her. and that feels worse than being ignored.” you added.

minjeong leaned her head back against the locker, staring at the ceiling tiles. “missing someone who’s still around is the worst kind of heartbreak.”

the hall was slowly filling up. you didn’t look for karina. you told yourself not to, repeated it like a mantra. but your eyes still drifted down the hallway anyway. she wasn’t there. and that was somehow worse.

you sighed. “i feel like i’m dying a little.”

“don’t say that.” she nudged your side. “come on. we have first period.”

you stood up straighter, grabbing your stuff. the ache in your chest didn’t shrink, but it felt a little less harsh with minjeong beside you. you didn’t know how today would go. if karina would look at you or not. but for now, you followed minjeong down the hallway. and you didn’t look back, even though you wanted to.

first period felt like a joke the universe was playing on you. you walked into class a little later than usual and you didn’t even realize how much hope you still had until it immediately deflated the second you saw her already in her seat.

same posture. same blank face. same casual lean in her chair like nothing was different. she didn’t look up. you moved to your seat beside her, careful not to bump anything or make a sound, like she was a deer and you didn’t want to scare her. not that she was scared of you. she just didn’t seem to care anymore.

you sat down. your bag hit the floor and your elbow barely brushed the edge of her desk as you settled in, and there was nothing. she just stared ahead while waiting for the teacher, perfectly unaffected.

“alright. pair up. group work today.” your teacher said, clapping his hands once like it would inject energy into a room full of barely awake teenagers.

you didn’t even process the assignment. didn’t really care what the topic was. all your brain registered was pair up and the panic that immediately followed. because she was right next to you. because of course you’ll be paired with her. that’s how the seats worked. you’ve been next to each other for weeks. you’ve been sharing pens, stealing glances, breathing in sync. you kissed her. you slept in her bed. and now you couldn’t even ask her what page you were supposed to be on.

you glanced over. she was already turning towards you like she had been prepared for this. her expression was unreadable. it was blank, smooth, and calm. the kind of mask she wore when she didn’t want you to know what she was thinking. you hated how much you still found it pretty.

you sat up straighter, trying to match her energy. “page sixty four.” she said flatly, not looking at you as she flipped open the book. her voice hit you harder than you expected. you haven’t heard it in days. at least not directed at you, and not this close.

you tried not to react. “okay.” you said, as flat. just as empty. she slid her copy between the two of you without asking. your eyes flicked to her hand, resting on the edge of the page. her nails were painted the same shade they were the last time she touched your face.

the assignment was something about literary analysis, metaphors or whatever, but you couldn’t concentrate. you were still waiting for her to break. to say something. but she stayed quiet, jotting notes neatly in the margin of her textbook. you stared at the same sentence for a full minute.

“i can handle the first half.” she said without looking at you. you nodded slowly, even though she wasn’t looking to see it. “i’ll finish the second.”

it was silent again. the clock ticked too loud. your heart ticked louder. you leaned your cheek against your hand, slouching a little. it wasn’t fully because you were tired. you just didn’t want her to see the look on your face. you didn’t want her to see how much you missed her. 

you peeked at her one more time. and for the smallest second, she was already looking. your eyes locked. it wasn’t long. half a second, maybe. but it was enough.

enough to make your pulse trip. enough to see the tiniest crack in her expression before she looked away, jaw tightening. you stared at for her a moment longer, wishing she would do it again. wishing she would speak. but she didn’t. just kept writing like it meant nothing. like you were nothing.

so you turned back to your own notes.

  ──────────౨ৎ───────────

you didn’t even wait for the bell to finish ringing. the second class ended, you slammed your laptop shut and shoved it into your bag before grabbing it. minjeong was already waiting in the hallway, leaning against the wall with that soft  look of concern she wore just for you now. you barely reached her before it all started spilling out.

“she literally looked me in the eyes for and a second. half a second, minjeong. and then nothing. just—cold air. like i’m delusional. like i imagined it.” minjeong started walking beside you, already nodding. “i figured. you looked like you were about to die.”

“i was about to die.” you huffed, crossing your arms. “she spoke to me once. one singular time. just to say the page number like we’re coworkers or something. she doesn’t even call me by my name anymore.”

minjeong side eyed you. “you want her to call you what? baby?”

you shoved her arm lightly but it didn’t wipe the frustrated look from your face. “i want her to stop acting like we weren’t all over eachother two weeks ago. like i didn’t— like we didn’t— god.”

“i’m going insane. i would literally take crumbs. a nod. anything.” you tugged on your sleeve. she didn’t say anything, but you knew what she wanted to say. you couldn’t survive on crumbs. but you still looked for them. you still watched the cafeteria doors just in case karina walked through first. you still wanted to be noticed.

you nodded along to whatever minjeong was saying now, but your eyes kept flicking to the door like they had a mind of their own. it was automatic and you hated that you were still hoping she would look for you too. then the doors swung open like some movie cue.

karina stepped through, light from outside catching on her hair, making it glow. ning and aeri trailed behind her laughing about something you couldn’t hear. karina didn’t laugh, but her lip twitched enough to tell you she was in it. existing fully in a world that did not include you. minjeong slowed down like she was bracing for it before it happened.

karina looked up and saw you. just for a second. a single second. her eyes flicked up and locked onto yours.

your breath caught. it was nothing but everything. she didn’t look surprised. she didn’t look angry. she didn’t look away. but she didn’t smile either. she just blinked and then turned. ning glanced at you mid laugh then quickly looked away.

“she saw me.” you said quietly, voice barely audible over the cafeteria noise. “i know.” minjeong replied just as quiet. you blinked hard and sat down before your legs gave out. you had no appetite and no energy to fake it. your heartbeat felt like it lived in your throat. you swallowed once. then again. “i thought maybe today…” you started and then shook your head. “doesn’t matter.” but you kept looking and karina never turned back.

first period felt louder than usual. the classroom was rowdy and your teacher was over it before 8:10. he vaguely waved a hand and told you all to “be productive.”

she didn’t look up when you sat beside her. just kept typing something on her laptop, hair tucked behind one ear and the sleeves of her sweatshirt pushed up to her elbows. her expression didn’t change. not even when your knees knocked gently under the desk.

“hey.” you offered quietly. “morning.” she replied without looking. it was already more than you got the day before. pathetic how you counted that as progress. she was still karina, though. you watched her scroll through a shared doc and for a second, your brain was like, this is the same girl who kissed you with her hand around your neck three weeks ago.

around the room, your classmates were already giving up on focus. someone was blasting tiktoks at full volume. someone else was recording them. karina finally spoke. “we should move.” you turned. “what?”

“it’s loud in here. let’s go the library.” she said simply, still not looking at you. you nodded. maybe a little too fast. “okay.”

she shut her laptop and slid it into her bag and you followed her out of the room without saying a word. the walk down the hallway was quiet. tension crackled between you like static, unspoken and unbearable. karina moved ahead of you and for a second you wondered if she was doing it on purpose. staying far enough that your shoulder couldn’t brush hers. you hated how much you wanted it to brush hers.

the library was half empty and you picked a table in the back, out of sight, tucked behind a bookshelf. she sat across from you and pulled out her laptop again like this was any other day. like she wasn’t breaking your heart in silence.

you opened your laptop and stared at it. karina didn’t say anything for a while. eventually, you broke. “i can’t focus when you’re like this.” her fingers paused on the keyboard then resumed. “like what?”

you looked at her. her face was unreadable, perfectly neutral, but her jaw was tight. “like nothing happened.”

karina didn’t meet your eyes. “we have a project.”

“karina.” that was when she sighed, finally glancing at you. her voice was soft but cool. “what do you want me to do?”

“i don’t know. look at me like you used to?” you whispered. her lips parted for half a second and then they closed. she leaned back slightly, watching you now. “i’m trying not to.” she admitted.

“why?”

“because if i start, i won’t stop.” the air stilled. her voice was too calm. like she was keeping herself from revealing everything she’s been hiding for the past five days. you stared at her, voice barely audible. “is that a threat or a promise?”

karina exhaled sharply. it was almost a scoff. but it wasn’t mean, it was just tired. “don’t tempt me right now.” and for a second, it was like the old current ran between you. electric, familiar, and addicting. you looked away first. she leaned forward, fingers tapping back at the trackpad like nothing had happened. “we need to finish the outline.”

you nodded, swallowing down everything else you wanted to say. but beneath the table, your feet brushed. and this time, she didn’t pull away.

this wasn’t fair. because she shouldn’t have been able to sit across from you like this, calm and composed, while your insides were on fire. she shouldn’t have been able to pretend like none of this was a big deal, like she didn’t know exactly how to get under your skin with one look. “i hate this.” you blurted again before you could stop yourself. karina tilted her head. “hate what?”

“you. this. the whole ‘barely speaking, but sitting two feet apart’ thing. i—” you stopped yourself, rubbing your temple like it might smooth over the emotional blowout. “it’s driving me insane.” her expression didn’t change right away, but something in her posture softened just slightly. her hand stopped hovering over the keyboard. “you think it’s easy for me?” she said quietly and you looked at her, annoyed now. “you’re the one acting like none of it mattered.”

“it mattered. that’s the problem.” she said, voice steady but low. she closed her laptop slowly, folding her arms on the table. “forget me and move on.“

“i don’t want to move on.” you whispered. she finally held your gaze and that was the end of it for you. you pushed your notebook aside and stood up before your thoughts could catch up. she looked up at you, confused for half a second until you came around the table and sat next to her. closer than you needed to. closer than you should’ve. her breath hitched. just a little.

“i know i shouldn’t.” you said almost to yourself. karina didn’t move. “then don’t.”

“i miss you.” you said and she closed her eyes for a moment, jaw tight. then she opened them slowly, eyes scanning your face like she was trying to memorize it. “you’re really not making this easy.”

“you were never easy.” you said and when she let out the softest laugh, you felt yourself fall all over again. you didn’t kiss her. but you wanted to. your knee pressed into hers beneath the table. and now, neither of you pulled away.

──────────౨ৎ───────────

you didn’t say much as the final bell rang. just packed up your things and let the weight of everything settle over your shoulders. outside of the classroom, minjeong was already waiting, leaning against the wall like she had been there for a while. she raised an eyebrow when she saw your face. you both stepped out into the afternoon sun, squinting a little. the light was too golden and too soft for how tired you felt.

the air was warm in that almost summer way, cicadas were humming in the distance, and minjeong nudged your elbow lightly. “you look like you just got hit by a truck.” she said, falling into step beside you. you scoffed under your breath. “it was more of an emotional car crash, actually.”

she laughed. “let me guess. she said one thing and now you’re freaking out.”

“she cares. she told me not to move on.” you said and minjeong made a face. “that’s so karina coded. saying just enough to keep you around, but not enough to actually say anything.” you knew she was right, but still. you couldn’t stop replaying the look in karina’s eyes when she said it. it wasn’t manipulative. it was like she really meant it.

you didn’t realize you were smiling like an idiot until minjeong groaned beside you. “oh my god. you’re literally happy about crumbs. like— dust. emotional lint. she gave you a vague ass sentence and you’re glowing.”

“i’m not glowing.”

“you’re glowing pathetically.” you elbowed her. “shut up.” but the truth was that you were glowing. just a little. it was embarrassing how much you missed her. how her silence felt like a punishment and a safety net at the same time. how the smallest bit of softness from her made you feel like maybe you weren’t crazy after all. you were halfway across the parking lot when you heard someone call your name.

“y/n!” you turned, blinking into the sunlight. it was sunghoon. he was standing off to the side near the bike racks, leaning casually against the metal frame like this was a totally casual encounter. he was obviously waiting. “hey.” you said in an uncertain tone, slowing your pace.

minjeong instinctively stayed close, watching him with an unreadable expression. he pushed off the bike rack, shoving his hands into his pockets. “i was hoping i would see you today.”

“oh?”

he shrugged. “yeah. i, uh… i’ve been meaning to talk to you.” you raised an eyebrow and minjeong shifted slightly beside you, silent but very much tuned in. “i just— look, this might be a little random… but i always thought you were cute. since, like… the first week.” he said, suddenly less smooth than usual. that made you pause. “what?”

“i mean, i didn’t say anything because karina was… you know. karina. she was clealy on you. i figured i didn’t stand a chance.” he smiled, but there was a flicker of hesitation in it. your pulse jumped. not because of him, but because you could feel eyes on you. you didn’t even have to look to know who it was. you felt the shift in gravity.

karina. you glanced over your shoulder, and there she was. across the lot, standing by her car with her keys dangling in her hand. aeri was saying something to her, probably teasing or talking about weekend plans, but karina wasn’t listening. she was locked onto you. not just looking — watching. like a lion behind glass. composed but far from calm.

sunghoon kept talking, oblivious. “anyway. i just figured… i don’t know, maybe things were different now. with you and her. are they?” he asked it so casually. but it echoed like a gunshot in your head. are they?

you didn’t answer right away. you could say no. you could say yes. you could pretend like this didn’t mean anything at all. but karina was still staring and your heart was beating in your throat. it made something inside you want to do something stupid inside you wanted to make her feel it. so you tilted your head before smiling. just barely.

“maybe.” you said softly. minjeong shifted beside you. sunghoon smiled like he just scored. but your eyes never left karina and hers never left you.

the hallway buzzed with post lunch noise. you were walking between sunghoon and minjeong and you could feel karina watching. you didn’t even have to look to know she was. sunghoon was saying something stupid about the vending machines always stealing his change and minjeong hummed beside you, arms crossed and suspiciously quiet. you tried to laugh along, nodding at the right times but your eyes kept flickering across the hallway.

she was leaning against the lockers, arms crossed and black sleeves pushed to her elbows. one ankle was crossed over the other. her eyes were unreadable from this distance, but you didn’t need to see them to feel the burn of her gaze.

so when she pushed off the wall and started walking — towards you — you genuinely thought she might just pass you by again. but instead, she stopped right in front of you. sunghoon faltered beside you, brows rising slightly. minjeong stiffened. “y/n.” karina said, like it wasn’t the first time she said your name a thousand different ways in her head.

“yeah?”

her voice was calm. a little too calm. “you wanna go to the library?” youstared at her for a second too long.

“right now?”

“yeah.” she paused. “for the project.” you glanced over at minjeong who just blinked once. it was one that said don’t look at me. sunghoon shifted beside you, awkward now.

“…sure.” you said. too quickly. karina nodded once. no thanks, no smile. just turned and started walking like she already knew you’d follow. and of course you did. you trailed behind her as the hallways noise faded behind you, the distance between you and the other two widening with each step. you didn’t say anything. you couldn’t. your heart was loud in your ears and karina’s silence felt heavier than anything you’ve ever carried.

she didn’t lead you toward the library.

you noticed the detour around the back staircase instantly, but you still followed. the moment you saw the door to the rooftop ahead, something in you twisted. “karina.” you said softly.

she didn’t look at you. she just opened the door and slipped through like this wasn’t completely, obviously not the library. you hesitated then stepped through.

the door clicked shut behind you, city buzzing quietly below. the rooftop was empty and the sky was a wash of soft blue and silver clouds. karina stood by the railing, facing away. her hands were gripping the edge. you didn’t speak. for a long minute, neither of you did.

you swallowed hard. “why are we here?” you asked finally. your voice sounded too small and you almost frowned when she didn’t turn. “because i couldn’t do it anymore.”

“…do what?” your fingers tightened on the railing. “pretend i don’t care.” she said, but her voice was shaky around the edges. the silence that followed was sharp and you couldn’t help but step closer. “then why did you?”

she was still facing away from you. “because i care too much.”

“i don’t know what you do to me, y/n, but you’re the only person who makes me feel like i don’t have control. everything is just a reflex with you and i— i don’t trust what i’ll do next.” you could see her posture shifting slightly, crossing her arms. your teeth found the inside of your jaw and pulled. 

“and seeing you with sunghoon? god, i really wanted to text his coach. i don’t know if he thought i was joking when i warned him the first time.” your eyes widened slightly. that’s what that one day was about. you tugged on your bottom lip.

“but i knew you wouldn’t have liked it and i didn’t wanna mess this up even more. not when i’m aching to hear your laugh again. and not just now, even when i’m trying not to. even when i’m lying in bed, forcing myself not to text you. even when i know i don’t deserve it.” she admitted and your throat burned.

you wanted to search her face — for guilt, for games, for anything that would make this feel safer. “i’ve never felt like this. i’ve never wanted someone like this. it’s terrifying. i think about you more than i think about anything else.” she said.

you exhaled shakily. “that’s not normal.”

“i know. but it’s you.” she said and your hands curled into fists at your sides. “why now?”

“because if i don’t say it now, i might see you with him again. i might lose someone who makes me feel something again. and i can’t.”

you looked down, overwhelmed. “karina…”

“i know i don’t deserve to ask you for anything. but i’m still going to.” she said, stepping closer. you looked up and her eyes met yours like it hurt her.

“come back. let me try again. let me do it right this time.” she whispered. she looked at you then and you didn’t think anyone has ever looked at you like that. like she was seeing something she’s been searching for in other people for years but never quite found until you. you wanted to believe her so bad. so bad that it hurt.

so you did, and she waited. not for a dramatic moment. not for control. just for you. and when you didn’t step back, didn’t say no, didn’t leave shut the door behind you and walk away, she smiled. slow and sure. 

“i win.” she whispered. your heart stopped. 

“what?”

“whatever game you think we’re playing.”

taglist — @saysirhc @m00nqvv @yuyuy90 (@spidrgamer @sh1ba100 @1800hotnfunn @hopeless-y)

[littlelamy]

the basement smelled like boys, no not dirty boys—not gross, like that—but a mix cologne and weed, a smell that followed rafe everywhere. you were perched right on rafe's lap, plush thighs bare, skirt riding up high, showing your lace thong while his big hand wrapped around your waist like a seatbelt. barry’s voice floated somewhere in the background, talking shit about something, and the other guys laughed, passing the blunt in a lazy circle.

you blinked up at rafe with big, glossy eyes and gave a little pout. “can i try it?” you whined out.

rafe didn’t even look down at you. he just smirked and shook his head slowly, eyes locked on the joint as it made its way around. “no, baby. this is for grown-ups.”

you gasped. “i am a grown-up!”

“no,” he said, finally looking at you, his mouth curling like he was trying not to laugh. “you’re my pink little slut. grown-ups”—he pointed at himself, then barry, then the guy across the couch who had an eyebrow ring and no shirt—“that’s grown-ups.”

you crossed your arms, your tits pressing up and out over the top of your babyphat baby tee, and gave him your most cutest look. “please? i just wanna try. one little puff. pretty please, rafe…”

he stared at you for a long second. then sighed, muttered, “fuck,” under his breath, and reached out to grab the joint as it came back around. he brought it to your lips with two fingers, the other hand sliding up your thigh for comfort.

“small hit,” he said. “don’t embarrass yourself.”

you grinned like you’d won the lottery. leaned forward, lips parted, and took a little drag.

you coughed immediately. your whole body jerked forward on his lap and your eyes went glassy with tears. barry cackled while someone else slapped their knee.

“aw, shit man!” someone said. “she ain’t built for it.”

you hacked and gasped, hands fluttering, clutching at rafe’s chest like he could rescue you from your own lungs. he rubbed your back, smirking down at you with a mix of amusement and affection that made your belly twist.

“you okay, princess?” he asked.

“i hate you,” you croaked, voice all raspy, eyes watering. but your giggle gave you away, even as you blinked through the tears.

he leaned in, kissed the corner of your eye, whispered, “drama queen.”

you settled back into his lap, still coughing once or twice, but the warmth was already spreading through your limbs. everything felt a little funny. not ha-ha funny, but loose and tingling. your skin buzzed where his hands touched you, like baby fireflies were crawling along your thighs, your hips, your waist.

you squirmed, his brow twitched soon after. “don’t start.”

“what?” you asked innocently, your voice light in contrast to your ass grinding down just a little as you adjusted.

he groaned more warning than an actual sound. “chi…”

“just moving.” you giggled again, but your hips didn’t stop.

the weed made everything feel…hot and needy. “baby,” you whispered, wiggling your hips, your breath ghosting against his ear. “you feel soooo good right now.”

his hand tightened on your waist. “baby.”

“you’re hard,” you whispered, like it was just between you and him and not the entire room full of stoned assholes who could definitely see you rolling your hips on his lap. “you’re big even when you’re not hard, but right now? fuck…”

his eyes snapped to yours, dark and molten. “you need stop.”

“or what?” you licked your lips, smiling, nose still flushed from the coughing fit. “you’ll spank me?”

he said nothing. just stared at you like he was debating whether to take you over his knee right there on barry’s shitty futon. the look alone made you clench, made your thighs squeeze around his.

you leaned in closer, tits brushing his chest. “maybe i want you to.”

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[adoresia]

FRISON ⋆ Armin Arlert

(noun) a shudder or shiver; thrill — suggestive

Armin doesn't usually go to silly High School parties. he tells everyone it's because he hates the noise — but its really because he doesn't know what to do with himself once hes there… too stiff in the limbs and way to aware of the way he takes up space. he's the kind to keep his phone brightness low and his voice lower.

but, Eren said you were coming. So now, he's here too.

"You're telling me you've bever kissed anyone and now you think you'll be able to bag a kiss, from her?" Eren teases him before pointing at your unmissable figure from across the room. For a moment he zoned out — gaze softening as it landed on you, like the rest of the world had quietly fallen away and you were the only one left standing there in silence.

"Helloooo? dude." Connie swatted a hand across his face, bringing back his consciousness to them instead. your image still lingered on the back of his eyelids . "What's going on in that pretty little head Armin? Fantasising about holding hands huh? Maybe even more?". Eren barked a laugh, lurching forward in an attempt to high five connie but completely missing instead.

Still though, Armin didnt plan in actually going up to you — not until Eren slapped down a bet…

"Twenty bucks says you don't get a kiss from her tonight…" he raised his eyebrow at him. "do you even have twenty dollars Eren." Mikasa chimed in as an attempt to defend Armin, rolling her eyes at his stupid bet.

But Armin was barely even present, his thoughts were clouded and sticky — dripping down his spine like syrup. Plus hes already two drinks in thanks to Eren and Connie… they called it 'liquid confidence'.

He's not drunk though.. just bold enough.

"Armin why are you still standing here. You look like a sick victorian child silently begging for help, can you just go and talk to her." Sasha deadpanned, popping up beside him. "I'm working on it… just need to calculate the timing." He responded. Eyes still glued on you. Sasha looked at him and then at you from across the room.

"Well.. if your gonna stand there all night with a suspiciously filled red cup in your hands at least act like it's not fruit shoot mixed with vodka…"

Despite it being half fruit shoot, it still burned going down. But the heat that followed felt steadier than the one rushing to his face. That's how he found himself moving — still a bit hesitant but just enough to melt into the crowd. He tried not to overthink his breath and the way his shirt clung slightly to his back. Until he stupidly stumbled into a taller guy. Disrupting his thoughts, and not hesitating to shove him back.

"Brother… watch where you're going."

"Sorry.. I'm so sorry." he mumbled, almost pleading. head ducked and stepping away a little more sober than he was before his thought process was disturbed and he had you in his line of vision. Maybe not the straightest line but it's the thought that counts…

And when he turned around, there you were.

you looked at him like he belonged there, like he didn't need Eren's shove or Connie's teasing. Or even the burn of that half fruit shoot half vodka drink in his throat. All you had to say was "hey." and that was enough for him

Eventually after a bit of nervous back and forth, you both got swept up in one of the quieter rooms upstairs. Sprawled mismatched cushions and someone's older brothers mattress. It was dim and hazy, the buzz of low music seeped through the space under the door. You sat cross legged opposite him, close enough for him to be able to smell what you were wearing.

That was bad.. very bad for him.

"Hmmm let's see. Never have I ever.." you tilted your head back, eyes drifting up at the ceiling in mock concentration. you're finger tip hoevered just over your lips — long enough for him to notice the tinted lipgloss you had on. It took you a while to figure out what else to ask, until curiosity hit you hard.

"Never have I ever… got a piercing."

he took a nervous sip from his fruit shoot diluted drink, and then chocked. that was all it took.

you gasped at the realisation, eyes wide. "No way.. really? Where?" He hesitated a bit, remembering how stupid it was and how he wished he never gave into Connie. But hey it's crazy what 75% orange juice mixed with 15% alcohol does to you right?

"My tongue…"

A beat passed.

"WHAT?" you yelled, accidentally. Choking on your drink in the process. "YOU? have a TONGUE piercing…?"

His face was already burning with embarrassment. He nodded, heat rising to his cheeks as he lowered his head in an attempt to hide what couldn't be seen, yet. "It's… you can't really um see it. Connie dared me, he periced it in his garage last summer. I still dont know why I let him do that."

You laughed, and his stomach flipped. "That's insane. But, cool." You admitted. "You think?" He questioned, his nervousness still lingering, yet you nodded. "You don't seem like the type." You added. " — but, I bet the girls you kiss appreciate you for it." You said leaning in just a little, the way someone does when they already know the answer but want to hear it anyway.

He didn't know how to respond. though for a second he wondered if you'd appreciate it more than said 'girls' he kissed. "Uhh.. yeah? I guess.." The tension grew thicker, staring even harder into his eyes didn't help either. You narrowed your eyes. "Hmm. Have you ever kissed someone before?"

He cleared his throat at the sudden question. "Uhh.. define kiss…"

You tilted your head, watching him fumble. It was entertaining. "So.. no..?" His cheeks flushed and his ears started burning. "I promise I know how. I just…haven't — yet…" a beat of silence stretched. You stared at him, eyes flickering to his lips. Drawn with curiosity — eagerness. And when you spoke again your voice dropped just enough to make his pulse stutter.

"Yet..?" You persisted, almost provokingly. "What are you waiting for?" The silence that followed was awkward, clumsy — but telling. he didn't necessarily know what he was waiting for; if it wasn't you, he hadn't thought that far ahead.

"Um. I don't know." He said quietly, voice a little hoarse.

"Okay. How about… you kiss me?"

He didn't answer at first. Just blinked, stunned and pink… and a little breathless. Like no one had ever offered before, which they haven't… the music from downstairs piles beneath the floorbaords, matching the beasts of his heart, it muted the distance and the weight of whatever was about to happen.

"Okay."

He leans in slowly at first, like he's not sure if he's reading this right. Like if he moves too fast he'll ruin it, yet still his eyes flicker to your lips, and then back up. Looking for some sort of sign. But you don't look away, and maybe that's all he needs.

He comes closer, until you can feel the warmth of him, the static air between you buzzing with something nervous and fragile. And then he closes the space. Not perfectly, his nose bumps into your and then he hesitates. Leaning in too fast — as if he doesn't trust himself to think it through first like he normally would. But his mouth is warm, and soft, and he makes this tiny sound when you kiss him back, like he's didn't expect you to.

He kisses like someone who knows what to do, but doesn't know what it'll feel like or how to execute it. Like his brain is lagging behind his heart. you feel it in the way his hands hover before sitting awkwardly on your lap, in the way he leans in again before you've pulled all the way back.

You laugh under your breath, barely. Your chest stutters when he chases the sound — kissing you again, clumsy this time. Wanting more than what you've already offered him. Needy in a way that makes something tighten in your chest.

"Okay wow" you pulled back, kind of shocked but also impressed. "Slow down a little, okay?" he blinked at you, still dazed as if he never pulled away from you. But then he kissed you again anyway, as if it was instinct, as if the second he stopped he felt like he lost the chance to feel you again. Like he could taste the courage in your mouth and he didn't want it to fade.

he walked home the next day during the quiet hum of the early morning, hoodie was zipped halfway and his eyes were on then pavement like it might give him answers. He didn't say much when they left the party — not because he didn't want to but because he couldn't find the words possible enough to decipher what just happened.

Connie walked ahead arguing with Jean over something dumb Eren said and mikasa trailed beside him, way too quiet for someone who had not slept.

"Bro still hasn't got a kiss, how lame." Connie called back to him suddenly, tossing the words like a pebble into still water. "That whole party and still nothing? Goodness me. Bless your little socks."

Armin didn't answer. Mikasa glanced back at him with the same expression. "Doesn't look like he's answering." She added. "Well yeah duh. It's because he didn't kiss her." He rolled his eyes. his ears were red and his hands were tucked deep into his sleeves, keeping his gaze down hoping that just maybe he he focused hard enough the sidewalk might open up and swallow him whole.

"No kiss huh?" Eren teased, throwing another look at Armin. "Nah bro. He's a lost cause…" Connie sighed.

armin never blieved in magic, but something about you feels like the kind that doesn't need a name.

PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT ;

nobody can say they fw Armin like me and liv do. that nerdmin art has you guys all on ropes (including me but thats not the point) THE POINT IS YOU GUYS ARE FAKE and we (me and liv) are the real fans BECAUSE okay let me speak okay. nobody knows about the time you would open the ‘armin x reader’ tag and only see me and liv in there bro UOU GUYS DONT KNOW the struggles we went through when nobody gave a gaf about him but now yoh guys do. NOW YOU GUYS ARE FEINING FOR HIM? okay. its okay? its alrught. just remember, were the og’s. i rest my case.

[pankowcrumbs]

Pissed off X Bucky Barnes

MasterList

Marvel MasterList

Bucky POV-

The chair creaked beneath me, the ropes around my wrists digging in tight. Blood had dried on my cheek, crusted along a split lip. My head pounded, and there was a metallic taste in my mouth that wasn't just blood it was rage.

They'd caught me off guard. Sloppy. I'd been walking back from the damn bakery a baguette in one hand and my phone in the other, texting Y/N about whether she wanted red or white with dinner. I never saw them coming.

Now I was in some rusted-out warehouse that stank of oil and mould. My captor a man with slicked-back hair and a scar running across his jaw like a lightning bolt paced in front of me with a swagger that grated on every last nerve.

"James Barnes," he drawled, tapping the butt of his pistol against his palm. "The Winter Soldier himself. Never thought you'd be this easy."

I let out a dry chuckle, ignoring the way my ribs ached. "You're not the first to think that. Most of them are dead now."

He grinned like he thought I was bluffing. Poor bastard.

"Here's how this is going to go," he said. "You're going to tell me the access codes to the Stark safehouse files. Or I start removing fingers."

I leaned back as best I could, giving him a slow once-over. "Yeah, see... that's where you cocked up."

His smirk faltered.

"You think I'm the dangerous one," I said calmly, eyes locked on his. "But you just pissed off my wife."

He snorted. "And what? She's going to call the police?"

"Worse," I said, letting a ghost of a smirk curl my lip. "She's a sniper."

The guy chuckled. "You're bluffing."

I shrugged as much as the ropes allowed. "Not many people cross Y/N and live to tell the tale. But go on, keep waving that gun. Maybe she'll make it quick."

He laughed again, louder this time, turning away from me.

And that's when the bullet ripped through the window.

The glass shattered with a high-pitched whine, and the man dropped like a puppet with cut strings, blood blooming across his chest. I didn't flinch. I just exhaled.

The silence that followed was deafening. My eyes flicked to the broken window, a neat, clean hole left in its wake.

A minute later, boots crunched over broken glass.

And there she was.

Y/N stepped through the warehouse entrance like a damn movie star rifle slung across her back, holstered sidearm at her hip, hair pulled back in that no-nonsense way that made my heart stutter even now. Eyes sharp. Confident. Lethal.

"Took you long enough," I said, grinning through the pain.

She gave me a once-over, lips quirking. "You look like shit."

"Still prettier than the guy you just shot."

"Debatable." She crouched beside me, pulling a knife from her boot and slicing through the ropes in one smooth motion. "You good to walk or do I need to carry your dramatic arse?"

"I'll manage," I muttered, rubbing my wrists. "Though, if you're offering a piggyback..."

She rolled her eyes but helped me to my feet anyway, one arm steady around my waist.

"You let them catch you with a baguette in your hand?" she asked, raising a brow.

"I was trying to surprise you with dinner."

"Next time surprise me by not getting kidnapped."

Despite everything, I laughed.

We moved quickly through the warehouse, her eyes scanning for more threats. I'd seen her in action before, but something about knowing she came for me stirred something deep in my chest.

Once we were outside and the cool night air hit my face, I paused. "You really shot him through a window?"

She smirked. "Two hundred metres. Crosswind."

"Marry me."

"We already did, genius."

I grinned, limping toward the SUV she'd clearly boosted. "Still. Would again."

She opened the door for me. "Next time someone nabs you, can you try not to flirt with the kidnapper?"

"Jealous?"

"No," she said, pulling the door shut once I was inside. "Just bored of cleaning blood off my boots."

As she climbed into the driver seat, I watched her profile in the glow of the dashboard lights. Strong. Unshakable. Mine.

I reached over and took her hand. "Thanks for coming for me."

She squeezed it. "Always, Buck. Always."

And as we drove off into the night, leaving the mess behind, I knew one thing for certain:

No one in their right mind would ever dare come between me and Y/N Barnes.

Not if they wanted to live.

[rista-senpai]

Love you in the shadows

pairing: Sung Jinwoo x f!reader

summary: You are Antares’ beloved daughter. His biggest treasure, despite him being the CEO of the second biggest company in South Korea. He would give up everything within minutes just to see your smile. Even so, you failed to keep your father just as delightful, since you ended up as the secretary of his biggest rival, the number one CEO in your home country, Sung Jinwoo.

            Being stuck with a so-called ruthless man, feared by many for his authoritarian presence and cold, dark eyes, didn’t sit well with your father. Yet, you found them mesmerizing, something magnetic in those royal purple irises. Little did you know that the exact same eyes would see you beyond professional matters, forcing you to keep your feelings under a key, given the fact that you didn’t want to betray Antares.

            However, how could someone resist him, when it’s just you two in the middle of the night, lights low, soundless rain hitting the wide windows in his office, the air out of your lungs in seconds, when he looks so ravishing, words not being enough to describe him?

tags & warnings -> office au, forbidden love, secret relationship, reader falls in love with the only man she shouldn’t have been near, she fell first, but he fell harder, age-gap (reader is 24, Sung is 32), smut with plot

previous part & next part

CHAPTER THREE

He changed.

You felt it first thing Monday morning, when the usual call for his coffee never came. Not a word, not a glance. Just silence echoing from behind the thick glass walls of his office.

At first, you brushed it off. Maybe he was just in early meetings. Maybe the weekend had drained him too. But by noon, the silence had calcified into something heavier.

He didn’t ask for the economic trend reports. His schedule sat untouched on the edge of your desk, his inbox flooded with unread messages you weren’t sure you were allowed to sort anymore.

Evening came, and that’s when you finally saw him.

Not the man you knew — not CEO Sung Jinwoo in his tailored confidence and razor-edged focus — but someone worn around the edges. Someone... else. His tie was loose, the top buttons of his shirt undone. Dark circles carved shadows beneath his eyes, and his usually polished hair was an afterthought.

Sleepless.

That’s the word that fits him now.

He didn’t acknowledge you when he passed by. Just a faint nod, as if you were another piece of furniture in the sleek office halls. You stared at your screen long after he disappeared, your fingers motionless on the keyboard. You couldn’t understand what went wrong — Saturday night kept replaying in your mind, forcing you to analyze every word, every look. But there was nothing you had done to deserve this silence. Still, you shoved that feeling deep down, like it would somehow dissolve on its own.

One of your worst ideas ever.

He didn’t ask for you in the following days either.

The clock was ticking. The meeting was just two days away. And he still wasn’t speaking to you.

With the weight of the entire office suddenly resting on your shoulders, you knew you couldn’t let this continue—not like this. Something had to give.

It was late at night, well past midnight, and as usual, you were the only two left in the building.

You found him in his office, the lights dimmed low, city lights casting fractured reflections across the glass walls. He didn’t look up when you knocked. Just muttered, “Come in,” like he already knew it was you.

You stepped in quietly, fingers curling around the file in your hand — a pathetic excuse to be there.

“You didn’t ask for today’s review,” you said softly. “Or yesterday’s. I just thought you might… need it.”

“I didn’t ask,” he replied without looking at you.

“I know.” You placed it gently on the corner of his desk anyway.

The silence dragged. Your hands fidgeted in front of you, unsure what to do, unsure if you should speak again. But the weight in the room was suffocating, and you were tired of walking on broken glass.

“Jinwoo,” you said — quiet, careful.

His gaze finally moved to you. Not sharp. Not cold. Just… guarded.

“You’ve been avoiding me,” you said, voice steady despite the sting it cost you.

He leaned back in his chair, slow and silent. “I’ve been busy.”

“You’re always busy. That’s never stopped you from talking to me before.”

He sighed, rubbing a hand across his brow. “It’s complicated.”

You nodded, even though your chest tightened at the words. “I figured.”

Another silence. This one is less sharp, more resigned.

“I didn’t know what to say,” he said finally. “Something changed after... Saturday”

You felt it too. The way things shifted. Not in the moment, but in the aftermath. How quiet he got. How careful.

“I know,” you said. “But we didn’t do anything wrong.”

His eyes flicked to yours again, this time longer.

“Didn’t we?”

You took a seat across from him, hands folded in your lap. “You don’t get to push me away just because things got real. I work with you. I care about this job. About what we built here. But I also care about…” you hesitated, “clarity.”

He looked like he wanted to say something, then didn’t. His gaze dropped to the file again.

“You’ve been quiet. We can’t go into that meeting on Friday like this.”

“No,” he agreed, voice low. “We can’t.”

“I’m not asking you to make anything easy. I just… don’t want us pretending nothing’s happened. Even if all we do is decide to keep it professional.”

He nodded slowly. “I respect you too much to pretend.”

That surprised you. The raw honesty of it. No games. No shields.

“Then maybe that’s a start,” you said gently.

The tension didn’t leave the room — not entirely — but it softened. Like air finally moving after a long stillness.

“I’ll see you in the boardroom,” you added, rising to your feet.

He didn’t stop you. But just before you reached the door, he called your name.

You turned back.

“I didn’t mean to make you feel like you weren’t needed.”

You nodded. “You did.”

A small pause.

“But I’m still here,” you said softly.

Then you left.

And behind you, for the first time in days, he let himself breathe.

Of course, you didn’t let yourself think until the elevator doors slid shut behind you.

Only then, as the hum of the descending car wrapped around you, did your shoulders sag, and your lungs finally remember how to work again.

God.

You leaned back against the mirror-lined wall, eyes fixed on the overhead floor numbers ticking down, each one dragging the weight of that conversation further into your chest.

You’d done it. You’d gone in there, looked Sung Jinwoo in the eye — the man who hadn’t spoken to you in days, who could break your career with a single word — and told him the truth. Not just as his assistant. As you.

It felt terrifying. It felt like a victory.

Your hands were trembling.

It wasn’t even that anything between you had been resolved—not really. But something had cracked open. The silence had been broken. The air felt clearer, even if only by a fraction.

When the elevator doors finally opened onto the lobby, you stepped out with the kind of quiet defiance that came after a storm. The night was still, the city outside bathed in streetlight and glass. Your phone buzzed in your bag, but you ignored it. Not tonight.

You needed to process.

Not the work things. Not the reports or the meeting or the way the office had started to feel like a frozen battlefield this week.

You needed to process him.

The look in his eyes. The guilt. The guardedness. The fact that, despite everything, he hadn’t asked you to leave.

And more than anything, the way your heart still twisted when he said your name.

You pressed a hand to your chest.

"Get a grip," you whispered to yourself with a dry, humorless laugh.

But deep down, you already knew the truth. You could pretend all you wanted that it was just tension, just confusion, just proximity…

But tonight had proved it. You weren’t walking on eggshells anymore.

You were standing at the edge of something.

And for better or worse, you weren’t alone on that ledge.

Taglist: @mitsurisupporter @milabyxz @shadyyouthcloud @cjafjatkstke @fianur @sky-casino @lemonninq @raspberrizzz @lavishlyjayda @blackqueen2k17 @livlikelove @uobasu @sylviatherosairy @jammycheese @reth66 @storacy @pikusururu @bubera974 @stormnightingale @emmathecouchpotato4583 @alebrasil0101 @amayakurusu13

[dreamersparacosm]

jeon jungkook - if we were us (part one)

warnings ; none

prompt ; in which life gives you and Jungkook one more chance to hold on.

note ; AH. IT'S HERE. i won't lie, finding where i wanted this story to start was extremely difficult and took me way longer than i want to admit. but after 2939393 cups of coffee and 393949 emhen inspirational quotes i made it. i have never been more excited about a piece of writing in my life!! for context, i began writing when i was 12 and have written numerous works over 200k words, but once i got to college, diverted to only one-shots and shorter fics to give myself time to live. now that i'm way too old to be on this app, i have time on my hands to actually enjoy writing stories and it both terrifies and excites me if you could see the notion file i have on this story you'd prob understand my anxiety a little more. on the bright side though, this is basically me signing a contract to stay on tumblr for at least another 6-8 months (or however long this story will take to complete.) all this to say, this story is incredibly nuanced and every character has flaws, trials, tribulations, yada yada. i hope your world is just as chaotic, devastating, exciting and messy as theirs. this is for all the lovers in the world who want a second chance. may it be sweeter than the first.

playlist here

series masterlist here

wc ; 3.9k

[YOUR POV]

You’ve always liked the rain. 

There’s something oddly comforting about it. The quiet hush of the droplets. The way it softens the edge of the world, but follows no pattern to its madness. 

Pretty much all your firsts have happened in the rain.

The first time you were dropped off for a playdate without crying, your shoes squelched against the pavement, raincoat sticking to the backs of your knees. The first time a friend hugged you was in middle school, outside of a 7-Eleven. The sky had opened up without warning, and you both laughed through it, soaked to the bone. Your first kiss was under a shared umbrella that kept tipping sideways, clumsy and warm and like two puzzle pieces that wouldn’t fully fit together but gave the illusion they might for a moment in time. He tasted like cherry gum and a thunderstorm that was gone too quickly.

The rain reminds you of beginnings. Unlike endings, they require no permission. They simply appear, uninvited, leaving behind fertile ground for whatever comes next. 

Morning light creeps in between the cracks of the blinds. A familiar heaviness weighs your eyes down, the air in the room cold in the way it always is when it rains outside. You shift slightly beneath the comforter, legs stretching out until your toes hit the edge of the mattress. Behind you, his arm tightens instinctively around your waist. 

You feel a soft groan rumble against your spine, breath fanning the back of your neck. Your body pauses its movement for a second, suspended between comfort and obligation. 

Outside, the rain taps against the window louder now. A familiar sound that makes you want to follow his actions and bury yourself into the thick sheets, pretend you have nowhere else to be. 

You really don’t want to get up. Clearly, neither does he. 

The pads of his fingers shift against your hip, digging into the bare skin. You can’t help but smile a little, even though it’s tired and small. 

“Joonie,” you murmur, voice thick with slumber. “I need to get up.”

That earns you another groan. A little louder, more dramatic. His face presses into your shoulder. “Mm. Five more minutes,” he mumbles. “World won’t end if you’re late.”

You want to believe him, but the kids in your class would say otherwise. 

You appease him, stay for one more breath. Maybe two. Normally, you wouldn't give yourself the extra grace. But it’s raining and beginnings are easier this morning. Plus, your boyfriend seems to be the human version of a teddy bear right now and you’re finding it quite endearing. 

Five more minutes, that’s what you give yourself. You don’t look at the clock or count the seconds. Time slips past slowly as you turn over and press your face into the side of his, kissing his cheek, jaw, the patch of skin just below his ear that’s always so soft. 

He doesn’t react much besides a sigh. His hold on your waist loosens as he recognizes your signal, your quiet touch that says you’re getting up. 

You slip out of bed carefully, trying not to shake the mattress too much. His t-shirt is bunched around your hips, creased and bunched from sleep. When you stand, it falls low to your thighs, brushing against your skin. 

The hardwood floor is cold under your feet. Rubbing at your eyes with the back of your hand, you drag yourself back into consciousness the best you can at 7 AM in the morning. 

You cross the room, flip the bathroom light on and begin your routine. It’s nothing glamorous, but when you work with children all day, this is the one part of the day you get to yourself. The version of you that isn’t constantly giving, fixing or soothing. Some mornings, it’s the only thing that keeps you sane. 

Your reflection in the mirror blinks back at you, fogged at the edges by the sleep still lingering in your expression. Halfway through brushing your teeth, you hear the creak of the mattress followed by the shuffle of feet across the floor.

Namjoon appears in the mirror, hair poking in ten different directions, leaning against the doorframe like his weight is too heavy to carry upright at this hour. 

“You look serious,” he teases. 

You glare at him sarcastically through the mirror and shrug, mouth full of minty toothpaste. 

“Deep thoughts?” he asks, stepping closer. He places a warm hand on your waist, his thumb dragging lightly across his shirt you’re still wearing. “Existential crisis already, and it’s not even 7:30, baby.”

You hum in acknowledgement around your toothbrush, raising an eyebrow. He presses a kiss to the side of your head. 

“What does your day look like?” he questions, reaching around you to grab the floss on the counter. 

You spit the foamy paste, wipe your mouth with the sink water. “I’ve got this new lesson plan I’m trying out. I’m hoping it lands well but knowing my kids, they’re going to make a mess.”

“Mess?” He cuts the piece of floss. 

“We’re using paint to help solve math problems.” Not your best idea. In hindsight, it sounded like it would heal your inner child but in practice, it’s definitely going to end with you cleaning paint off your jeans for the next two weeks. 

“Sounds exhausting,” He leans into the mirror to see his teeth better.

“And you?” You meet his eyes in the reflection, smiling briefly. 

“Mm,” he pauses to run the floss between his teeth before speaking. “Work call at 10. Then coding a shit ton of our new website features. Jin also asked me to look at paint samples with him, which will take approximately four more hours than it needs to.”

You snort out a laugh, “That’s what you get for agreeing to help with his kitchen.”

“Thought I was being a good friend,” he throws out his floss, grabbing his toothbrush out of the holder. “Kinda also wanted the free lunch.”

“Jin already thinks you’re a great friend, baby,” You splash some cold water on your face, trying to liven up your skin. “You know that.”

You’ve known Jin since college. He was always loyal — the kind of friend who showed up with takeout boxes when you were sad, who knew your exam schedules better than you did, who cracked your shell before others even brought out the hammer. You don't talk everyday, but when you do, it always feels like you’re picking up mid-conversation. 

Back when you and Namjoon were just hooking up, seeing where life took you, you introduced Jin to him. He was overprotective like an older brother in a sitcom, side-eyeing Namjoon between bites of ramyeon. Now, the two of them argue about kitchen appliances like they’re married and have a shared spreadsheet for wine recommendations you’re not allowed to edit. 

Sometimes you wonder if Namjoon fell in love with Jin and you were an afterthought. 

Namjoon chuckles while putting paste on his toothbrush, “He better. I sat in his house for two hours last week listening to him talk about that new guy he’s seeing and I… heard things no one should have to hear.”

“I thought we agreed not to talk about Jin’s sex life with him,” You poke his side as you lean against the sink, watching your boyfriend with amusement. 

He spits out the toothpaste, waving the brush in the air animatedly. “You agreed. I tried to agree and got roped into it anyway.”

Rolling your eyes, you push yourself off the sink with your palms and go, “Breakfast?” 

He nods at you, and you disappear down the hall, arms wrapped tightly around your body to block off as much of the cold air as possible. 

Your mornings have always been trivial. Insignificant in the grand scheme of the universe. You move on autopilot: pan on low heat, fridge door creaking open, eggs gathered in one hand, butter in the other. The coffee machine gurgles in the corner. His favorite mug  — the one with the chipped rim and the ugly cartoon bear on it  — is already out on the counter. You know he likes his eggs over easy, toast not too burnt, coffee with a splash of creamer. 

You barely think about these things anymore. 

It’s not like he ever asked you to be this way in the morning. Never said a word about it, or gave any sort of hint, never played helpless in front of the stove. But it was an invisible task that folded in on your routine without ever being discussed. 

It’s what love looks like, you remind yourself. The quiet dig of learning each other’s habits, small sacrifices piling up like layers beneath your feet. 

It doesn’t bother you. You like to give. You remember birthdays without setting calendar reminders, refill the Brita before it’s empty. And it’s not that people don’t love you back. You're just always a few steps ahead, already halfway into caring before anyone else even notices there was something to do. 

Namjoon walks in as you’re cracking the eggs, eyes still droopy with sleep. He’s no longer shirtless, now in his forest green hoodie he always wears when he works from home, which these days, appears to be more often than not. He yawns into his fist before grabbing two plates from the cabinet and setting them down beside you. 

“You beat me to it,” he taunts, gently bumping your hip. 

You hum, flipping the eggs with the new spatula his mom got you last week. “Didn't know it was a race.”

He chuckles, rubbing a hand across the back of his neck. “I was gonna offer. Technically, last week, I made the coffee.”

“Mm. The machine made coffee, baby. You pressed the button.”

He doesn’t respond to you.There’s not much more to say to that. Instead he leans down and presses a kiss to your cheek. It almost feels like punctuation. Like a period that stops any other words from leaving your mouth. 

He’s quiet for another second, then breaks the silence in the air, “We still good to go to that baby shower on Sunday?”

You vaguely remember him telling you about his coworker’s pregnancy. All you know is it was an event that showed up on your shared calendar in the kitchen, circled in red and scrawled in messy handwriting. 

You nod as you plate the eggs, “Yup. Two o’clock, right?”

“Precisely.” Namjoon runs a hand through his unruly dark brown hair. “Seo-yeon mentioned something about a bouncy house?” 

“A bouncy house?” you repeat incredulously as you hand him his plate. “At a baby shower?” 

“She said the baby can’t use it but the adults should still have fun.” He shrugs like it makes perfect sense. Seo-yeon, his coworker at the tech startup he works for, has always been an eccentric female. You’ve met her a handful of times, but that was more than enough to understand why Namjoon refers to her as an ‘old soul.’ A bouncy house at her baby shower doesn’t even crack the top ten on the list of things that surprise you.

You giggle under your breath, passing him the plate. “If you catch me in the bouncy house, just know I had one too many mimosas.”

Namjoon rounds your tiny kitchen table, settling down in the chair. “Do we need to bring anything?” 

You hesitate for a moment. You don’t really have the heart to tell him you went down to the market last week to pick up a blanket and bear set for her. But you know if you dodge the question, he’ll ask again in a few days. “I already got the gift.”

You hear him start to chew, fork scraping against the plate. “Cool. Thanks, baby.” 

You think he’ll ask you what you got Seo-yeon, but he doesn’t.

You walk over to the coffee machine, pouring out the dark liquid into your respective mugs. Splash of cream for him. Three sugars and milk for you. You set his cup in front of him, ceramic clinking softly against the table, before heading back to the countertop and retrieving your own plate and mug to match.

When you settle in front of him, he peers into your mug. “I don’t know how you drink that.” 

To further prove his own point, he takes a sip, immediately wincing. “God,” he mumbles. “That’s not coffee. That’s dessert.”

“I like it sweet.”

“Offensively sweet.” He deposits your mug back down on your side of the table as if quarantining a biohazard. He’s a broken record at this point, always reminding you that one day, you’ll get a cavity from how sugary you prefer your drinks. Like a ghost that haunts every breakfast table discussion about your choice of beverage. 

“Well.” You tuck a piece of toast into your mouth. “Not all of us are fueled by burnt beans and overpriced creamer.”

He laughs at that, the sound ricocheting across kitchen surfaces. He’s always been easy to talk to, to sit beside in the stillness of early mornings where the world hasn’t quite remembered it exists yet. 

“One day, I’m going to get you to drink black coffee,” he teases. “Whatever it takes.”

“Don’t hold your breath,” you laugh as you cut up another piece of your eggs. 

“You still doing the bug project with your kids?” he asks, and you feel a wash of gratitude for the change in conversation topic. 

You nod, sighing, “Day three. Which means today’s the day someone accidentally steps on an ant farm and cries about it like it was their childhood pet.”

His mouth curves upward, eyes crinkling, “Weren’t you the one who said this year’s class was your most emotionally stable?”

“They are,” you insist around a mouthful of toast. “However, they did stage a protest yesterday when I tried to throw out a dead butterfly. Held a moment of silence and everything. I’m pretty sure they’re building it a grave out of popsicle sticks.”

Namjoon nearly chokes on his eggs. “I’m impressed.”

“You should come by sometime. Meet the little fuckers who take up all my time.” You’re half-joking, half-not. The last (and only) time he visited your classroom was the holiday party where you first met, when he was someone else’s reluctant plus one. You often watch other teachers partners’ appearing at classroom doors, bearing lunch and casual affection. 

He shakes his head. “I barely survived kindergarten on my own.” 

Between bites, he adds, “Got that deployment to push through today. Something’s breaking in the new UI, but I can't tell if it’s the framework or the entire infrastructure.”

You blink at him, chewing thoughtfully. “Wow. Sexy.”

“I know,” he smirks. “Almost as sexy as your bug project.”

You place a hand over your heart, sarcastically swooning. “God, nothing gets me going like scalable infrastructure.” Words harvested from his work calls — incomprehensible things you say without understanding the origins.

He lifts a hand in mock warning. “You better pray I don’t start talking about data streams before you finish breakfast.”

You snort, taking another sip of your coffee. “Enjoy your precious code. I’ll be elbows deep in glue and paint by 9 AM.”

Namjoon finishes his coffee before you do, setting the mug on the sink. When he passes, he kisses your temple, hand grazing your back like water over stones, “Have a good day, baby.”

You nod, already pushing your chair back once your eyes catch on the kitchen clock’s accusatory hands. “You too.”

He disappears down the hall towards his makeshift home office, leaving behind the scent of coffee and the cologne you bought him last Christmas. You stay at the table a second longer. Long enough to sip what’s left of your coffee, now lukewarm and overly sweet. Long enough to listen to the rain tapping against the windows like it’s trying to say something you can’t make out. 

Long enough for you to wonder when sweet started tasting like something you needed to apologize for. 

“An iced mocha latte? Did anyone order the iced mocha latte?” 

Your favorite barista's voice rings throughout the quaint coffee shop, bystanders perking up in hopes of hearing their order called. Everyone collectively deflates when they see a frantic woman barrel past apologetically, reaching for a drink that clearly isn’t theirs. 

You don’t bother lifting your head up. Poor Jiwoo. She’s been manhandling the coffee shop by the school you work at since the day you started, and she might be the only barista who understands how much sugar you typically prefer in your coffee. 

If she ever leaves the shop, you’re pretty sure you’d have to transfer school districts out of grief alone. 

You prefer to leave early for work, leaving ample time to collect your candied coffee, run through your lesson plan, and gossip with the other teachers for at least ten minutes in the lounge.

Unfortunately, today, you might have to exclude the gossip session you enjoy so much. A tragedy in three acts. 

There are two new students starting today, and while you normally enjoy fresh faces in the classroom with different personality types to tame, you already have your hands full between the bug project and the ‘paint your 2+2’s’ activity you very ill-advisedly volunteered to lead. 

“Hey, [Y/N],” Jiwoo solemnly leans over the counter where you're perched, waiting patiently as any good samaritan does if they don't want their coffee spat into. Her hair is frizzing at the edges, apron already stained. “I’m so sorry for the wait. Normally I put a rush on yours, but this Monday is really kicking my ass.”

She looks so stressed you almost want to go back there and put on an apron, maybe start whipping up some Iced Americanos.

“It’s no problem,” you wave her away. “You know I always come way too early.”

She gives you an appreciative smile, rushing back to the counter to take more orders. You turn your back to the crowd, enjoying the view outside. There’s a few kids clutching their mother’s hands, businessmen holding briefcases while fighting with umbrellas, a teenage boy hopping puddles like he’s in a video game. Against the windowpane, the rain sticks to the glass, slowly sliding to make space for new ones. 

“Hi, can I get an iced vanilla latte?”

You’re close enough to the counter that you’ve started eavesdropping on other’s orders without meaning to. Honestly, an iced vanilla latte sounds pretty good. You once got an iced caramel macchiato before 9 AM though, and you were vibrating like a tuning fork until your last kid went home at 2 PM. The girl’s voice is distressed as she taps her card against the reader, probably running late to work now from the long line. 

“Hey, can I get a black coffee? Hot?”

The second voice is different. 

It’s a man’s. Can’t be older than mid-30s. It’s lower, calmer. Unrushed. Like honey poured over gravel. 

Everything in your body stops functioning. 

It’s as if someone snipped the film reel mid-scene. The cafe around you doesn’t gradually fade. It’s replaced by a silence so loud you can hear your own blood rushing through your veins. The clink of cups, the hiss of the milk steamer, the shuffle of feet becomes background collateral, dissolving into white noise. 

Your hands clench around nothing. Lungs forget their one job. Your heart reverberates against your ribs like it’s trying to signal an emergency to anyone within radius. 

No, that second voice is a voice you haven’t heard in ten years but would recognize in a burning building. 

The second voice is a voice that has set up permanent residence in your bone marrow, lingering even after you thought you’d evicted every last trace of him from your system. 

You don’t dare turn around.

You stand there, statue-still, staring out the rain-streaked window as if memories don’t curl up and hibernate in your throat, waiting for precisely this moment to wake and stretch. 

Your eyes close for a brief second. 

When you open them again, the world outside continues its persistent motions. But you, you remain perfectly still, a pause button pressed in the center of the city. 

Seoul is a big city. You’re 32 now and far too old to believe in ghosts.

He wouldn’t be here. He made that very clear a decade ago. 

You hear another voice begin to recite their order. He’s probably off to the side, somewhere in the shop that is now dwindling down the number of patrons inside as work hours creep up on the clock. You’re too scared to breathe, to even glance one foot in the other direction. 

Your eyes instead train ahead on the bag of coffee beans untouched on the counter. 

“Iced coffee, three sugars and milk?” Jiwoo comes running over to you, a triumphant grin on her face as if she just defeated the morning rush. “God, I’m so sorry for the wait. Yours is on the house next time.” 

“No, it’s no problem,” You lean over and pat her hand, like you’re trying to prove your heart hasn’t actually stopped and you’re still a live human, even though it feels like it might. 

You shuffle over to the side station where the honey, tiny wooden stirrers, and other small distractions meant to keep your hands busy are. You grab a few napkins for yourself. You can’t trust your grip right now. In the distance, Jiwoo rattles off some other orders you can’t make out. One of her coworkers comes rushing in, red-faced and apologetic. 

You glance up at the clock on the wall. 8:30 AM. You’ve made great time despite the numerous coffee mishaps. And clearly, you need to sit in your chair and take a moment to yourself, because you’re now hallucinating the ghost of college’s past, and it’s too early to do that. 

You stir in some honey into your coffee. Taking a slow, deep breath, you turn a half-step with coffee in tow. 

And then, because the universe has a spectacular gift for comedic timing, you collide with someone. 

Your shoulder meets theirs, your cup shifting in your hand and sending a small wave over the lid’s edge. 

“Oh god, I’m so sorry—”

Your eyes are already tracking the damage, focusing on white sneakers now marked with a small splash of brown. Nothing ruinous, but your body finds itself crouching, napkins in hand, some deeply ingrained instinct to make things right taking over.

“No, it’s okay,” the voice says.

It’s the second voice. Gentle. That same calm. 

You know this voice the way you know the road home in the dark, the way plants know to grow toward sunlight. 

Slowly, you lift your gaze upwards. 

He’s older, of course. More settled into himself. The lines around his eyes weren’t there before, shoulders carrying the weight of ten more years of living. His eyes stare into yours, somehow still reading every inch of you despite the decade-long gap. 

Reality blurs at the edges. The rain against the window falls silent. The coffee shop with its morning bustle recedes. Your heart hangs suspended from one beat and the next. The napkins fall to the floor, your wobbly legs struggling to stand upright. 

On a rainy Monday morning, where beginnings are endless, your ex boyfriend from university, Jeon Jungkook, stands in front of you holding a cup of black coffee in his right hand. 

masterlist + ask

taglist ; @arcanekookz @writesvani @yooniepot @whoa-jo @nimmmnikk @readingbee44 @jungshaking @starlight-1010 @jadaocon1 @phoenixxxxstarrrr @jkaxl @butterymin @almatiarau @lovingkoalaface @carriereadsbooks @bhonbhon @lola75111 @yoonstaar @namkookie222 @jeonjenny @lachimochala @kissyfacekoo @libra04 @minimoninini @goldenjeonkoo @ot7even @kopiosuam @annpeachy @literallyjimin @prxdajeon @purplelanterns @neg-l3ct @gguk-lvr @misakiminaa @wisebouquetbarbarian

[fredswrite]

A/N: Oh myyyyy. My first James Kelly fic I’m so happy hehe. I spent so much time on this and I hope you enjoy this just as much as me!!

SUMMARY: After your car broke down, you don’t really have a choice but to go to the nearest auto shop you can find. What a surprise to see that a certain James is working there.

WC: 1.2K

WARNING: None for this chapter.

MLST part 1 part 2 part 3 part 4 part 5?

ONE NIGHT STAND

The auto shop wasn’t much to look at.

Its sign was half-lit, one of the bulbs flickering against the gray sky. The garage doors were rusted at the edges, and a battered old truck sat out front like it hadn’t moved in weeks. You hadn’t even noticed the place before today, even though you must’ve walked past it dozens of times. But when your car sputtered out two blocks from your apartment and refused to turn over, no click, no crank, nothing, this place suddenly felt like your only option.

But when you walked inside, the bell ticking at your arrival, you saw the man you least expected to see, hell, you wanted to forget him.

You weren’t supposed to see him again.

That was the unspoken agreement, the deal made somewhere between the second whiskey and the third kiss. A night of heat and nothing more. No last names. No texts. No follow-up.

And yet, there he was.

James.

Standing in the middle of the open garage bay, his shoulders broad under a blue work overall smeared with grease, his sleeves pushed to his elbows. The sunlight caught on his forearms as he leaned over the open hood of a car, one hand steady on the frame, the other wiping a rag across the side of his wrist.

You stopped mid-step. Your breath caught. The engine noise faded into the background like someone hit mute on the world.

He hadn’t seen you yet.

You could leave. You should. But your car died on the side of the road not ten minutes earlier, and the old guy at the front desk had called ahead to this shop for a repair. It was supposed to be just a quick fix. A battery, maybe. A cable.

Not him.

You took a step forward. Gravel crunched under your black boots. His head turned from the car he was working on at the sound.

And then those eyes, the ones you hadn’t been able to forget, locked onto yours.

The world seemed to hold its breath.

For a second, you couldn’t tell if he recognized you. His expression didn’t shift. No smirk. No flicker of embarrassment. Just the same unreadable stare he’d given you that night, right before he kissed you like he didn’t know how to be gentle, like he hadn't eaten in days.

Then his jaw tightened.

He knew.

“Can I help you?” His voice was low. Unchanged. Familiar in a way that made your chest feel like it was cracking open.

You opened your mouth. It took a second for the words to come.

“My car died,” you said. “I called and they sent me here. He said one of his guys would take a look.”

James nodded once, slowly. “You’re the Civic?”

You nodded.

He didn’t say anything else. Just walked past you toward the front office, all calm professionalism. Like you were a stranger. Like he hadn’t pressed you against a hallway wall two months ago and whispered your name into your neck like a confession.

You followed him into the office.

The same old man was waiting behind the desk, cheerful and oblivious. He handed you a clipboard and asked you the usual questions: make, model, last time you had it serviced. You answered mechanically, pen scratching across paper as your ears rang.

Out of the corner of your eye, you could feel James watching you. Not obviously. Not directly. But it was there, the weight of it. The question in his silence.

He whistled low at the battery code and sent one of the younger guys to go pick up your car. “Might be a quick fix,” he said, glancing between you and James. “Unless the starter’s fried.

“I’ll check it,” James said, already turning back toward the garage.

You hesitated. “James—"

He stopped as you left the office to meet him by the counter.

Didn’t look back. Just stood there, spine straight, hands on his hips.

You dropped your voice. “You weren’t gonna say anything?”

He turned then. Slowly. Blue eyes locked on yours, sharper than you remembered.

“I didn't realize it was you.”

“And now that you know?”

A beat.

“I’m still figuring that out.”

There was no heat in his voice. No guilt either. Just that same steady calm, like he never let himself react too fast. That same tension you’d felt after he kissed you the first time, like he was always holding back more than he gave.

You stepped toward him, just a little. Not enough to make a scene. Just enough that the air shifted between you.

“I didn’t think I’d see you again,” you said.

His gaze dropped to your mouth, just for a second. Then back to your eyes.

“We weren't supposed to, didn’t want to explain anything.”

“Why?”

“Because it wasn’t supposed to mean anything.”

The words stung more than they should have. But he didn’t say it like it was cruel. He said it like it had cost him something, too. But that was the engagement you both signed when you shared your kisses.

“And now?” you asked, quietly.

James glanced toward the bay. The clang of tools echoed in the background. His jaw worked once, like he wanted to say something else but didn’t know how.

“I don’t know,” he said. “You want the truth?”

You nodded.

“I didn’t stop thinking about you,” he said. “But I figured you moved on. People like you don’t circle back.”

You blinked. “People like me?”

“People who stick to comfort. I’m not that kind of guy.”

Your heart thudded once. Twice.

“Well,” you said, voice soft but steady, “I guess the universe decided you were for today.”

A faint smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. It didn’t reach his eyes, but it was the closest you’d seen to something real. You don't think he even smiled that night, but the alcohol didn't help.

“You want me to pretend we don’t know each other?” he asked.

You shook your head. “That’s not what I said.”

He didn’t speak for a long second. Then he stepped forward. Close. Close enough that you could smell the soap on his skin beneath the grease and sweat and metal. Close enough to remember exactly how he’d looked above you in the half-light of that one messy night.

“I don’t forget that easily.” he said.

Neither did you.

He didn’t touch you. Not yet. But his hand brushed yours as he passed toward the door.

He walked towards your car, which had been towed into the parking lot. Your heartbeat shattered out of your chest like a hammer.

And this time, he didn’t leave.

TAGS: @haydenchristensenisbae @f1wh0recom (lmk if you want to be added)

[christopherisfoive]

could u maybe do a seungmin or minho with prompt(s) 10,14,15? thank u i love ur work <3

☕ Order’s up, angel! Your Seungmin enemies-to-lovers tension just got topped with a dash of soft candlelight and a near-kiss that almost changes everything. Hope it hits just right. ₊˚ෆ

Snow Lines

Pairing: Kim Seungmin × Reader Setting: College Friends • Spring‑Break Cabin l Prompts: 10 “Were you just about to kiss me?” • 14 Enemies‑to‑Lovers tension • 15 Sharing a bed for the first time

The old van sputtered and rattled its way up the narrow mountain road, each bump jolting you awake from your half-sleep. Through the fogged windows, the surrounding pines stood like silent sentries under the weight of fresh snow. The distant lights of the cabin gradually appeared, blinking softly between branches.

"Almost there," Chan announced from the driver's seat, his voice laced with exhaustion but still warm enough to feel comforting. Behind you, Felix mumbled something incoherent in his sleep, head lolling against Hyunjin's shoulder, while Jisung recorded the moment, whispering dramatically into his phone camera.

Nine friends crammed into one cabin for spring break—what could possibly go wrong?

The van finally came to a halt with a final exhausted wheeze. Doors swung open, unleashing a flurry of boots hitting gravel and laughter mingling with the sharp mountain air. Felix's camera swiveled around, capturing everything from Changbin’s exaggerated stretch to Jeongin slipping on the icy patch, his startled laugh echoing into the night.

“Careful, I.N!” Chan called, chuckling as he pulled bags from the trunk. “We’d like to keep everyone alive this week.”

Inside, the cabin air was tinged with the scent of pine, dust, and years of vacationers before you. It felt cozy in a worn-in sort of way, wooden walls adorned with outdated ski lodge posters, rugs faded by footsteps. Hyunjin, already comfortable in his role as unofficial trip leader, waved a laminated floor plan triumphantly over his head.

“Gather round, peasants,” he announced dramatically, spreading the map across the battered coffee table. “Bunks go to pairs. And the lucky winners get the queen bed in the loft.” He reached into his beanie, revealing folded slips of paper. “Fate decides tonight.”

You watched the draw unfold with mild amusement, too tired from the trip to mind much either way. Felix cheered when paired with Jisung; Hyunjin high-fived Changbin as if they'd won a grand prize. Jeongin, Minho, and Chan took the triple bunk room in resigned acceptance.

Only two slips remained. Hyunjin grinned as he pulled them free, eyes sparkling with mischief. “And for the queen suite—Y/N and… Kim Seungmin.”

A collective "oooh" filled the room, Jisung’s camera swiveling rapidly between you and Seungmin as if hoping to catch a dramatic reaction.

You glanced at Seungmin, who stood with an unreadable expression, eyebrows raised just slightly in quiet resignation.

“Try not to kill each other,” Chan said with a tired smile, earning scattered laughter.

Seungmin only sighed lightly, picking up his neatly packed suitcase and heading for the stairs without another word. You grabbed your duffel and followed slowly, already mentally preparing yourself for the days ahead.

Upstairs, the loft held a simple warmth, slanted ceiling lined with exposed beams, the bed large enough to dominate the small space. Seungmin placed his suitcase precisely at the foot of the mattress, claiming territory without hesitation.

You dropped your bag next to the window, making sure to stake your own claim. Silence lingered, awkward enough to make the space feel smaller.

“You don't snore, right?” Seungmin broke the quiet, voice dry yet edged with just enough sarcasm to remind you of your usual dynamic.

“You don't alphabetize your dreams, right?” you shot back lightly.

His lips twitched slightly, neither fully a smile nor a frown, but it eased the tension slightly. Outside, snowflakes began tapping softly against the window, creating a gentle rhythm.

"Come on," he finally said, tilting his head toward the stairs. "If we don’t hurry, Felix will eat all the good snacks."

You hid your surprise at his easy peace offering, simply nodding as you both headed back downstairs—uncertain allies, at least for now.

By the time you and Seungmin stepped outside, the bonfire was crackling to life. The firepit, ringed by snow-dusted logs, bathed your friends’ faces in flickering amber. Sparks spiraled gently into the velvet darkness above, vanishing into the cold night air.

"About time," Changbin called out, eyes playful as he threw another log onto the fire. "We thought you'd already started arguing about room decor."

"Don’t worry," Seungmin answered smoothly, tugging his beanie lower over his ears. "We've saved plenty of arguments for your entertainment."

You rolled your eyes, though your lips curved upward slightly. Seungmin caught your expression, the corners of his mouth lifting briefly before he turned away, adjusting the cuff of his jacket.

Felix, ever the unofficial videographer, waved his camera excitedly, catching the moment. "Did you two just smile at each other?" he asked, pretending disbelief. "The plot thickens."

"You’re hallucinating, Lix," you called back, voice dry as you took a seat on a log opposite Seungmin, the fire between you feeling both literal and symbolic.

Chan distributed steaming mugs of hot cocoa, the warmth radiating comfortingly through your gloves. You wrapped your hands around the cup gratefully, inhaling the rich scent. Across from you, Seungmin carefully stirred his cocoa, movements precise even in casual comfort.

"Alright, gather round," Changbin announced dramatically, leaning forward with a mischievous grin, flames casting dancing shadows across his face. "Who’s ready for ghost stories?"

Jisung raised his phone instantly, eyes sparkling in anticipation. "Wait, wait, wait—let me get the right angle."

"Are we sure that’s wise?" Jeongin asked, eyes wide and playful. "Last time Bin told ghost stories, Felix didn't sleep for three nights."

Felix looked affronted but nodded in solemn agreement. "It’s true. My sleep schedule has never recovered."

Hyunjin tossed a marshmallow toward Changbin, narrowly missing the firepit. "I’ll risk Felix’s sleep for the sake of tradition."

As Changbin launched into a tale, voice theatrically deepened, your gaze drifted across the fire, landing on Seungmin. He sat quietly, half-listening, half-watching the flames. Shadows danced across his face, highlighting his cheekbones, the gentle sweep of his eyelashes. When his eyes flickered up, meeting yours unexpectedly, your stomach tightened in surprise.

Caught off guard, you quickly looked away, heat rising in your cheeks that had nothing to do with the fire.

Hyunjin interrupted the ghost story abruptly with an exaggerated scream, sending Felix into startled laughter and Jisung toppling backward off his log. "That’s it, no more stories for Hyunjin," Chan declared firmly, though his voice was warm with amusement.

"You’re banned," Jeongin agreed, mock-serious as he helped Jisung up from the snow.

Seungmin's low chuckle drifted across the fire, quietly amused. The sound was unexpectedly gentle, a stark contrast to his usual dry remarks. You glanced at him again, curiosity piqued.

"You didn’t find that scary?" you asked, hoping your voice sounded teasing rather than genuinely curious.

His eyes flicked to you, a small, knowing smile appearing. "Ghost stories? Not really. Hyunjin’s scream? Terrifying."

You laughed softly, the moment of unexpected camaraderie surprising you both. "Agreed. Gonna have nightmares tonight."

"Good luck with that," he replied lightly, stirring the cocoa again, gaze dropping to the swirling liquid. "I’m not rescuing you from nightmares."

You raised an eyebrow playfully. "Who said I'd need rescuing?"

He glanced up again, eyes glinting softly in the firelight. "Just a guess."

Changbin interrupted, waving his hands dramatically. "If you're done whispering sweet threats at each other, maybe you'd like to join our marshmallow roast?"

Embarrassment flooded your cheeks as your friends laughed good-naturedly. Seungmin, for once, looked equally caught off guard, hiding his face partially behind his mug.

"You heard him," you said, forcing casualness into your voice and standing quickly. "Time to burn marshmallows."

You grabbed a marshmallow from the bag Felix offered and poked it onto a stick with determination, refusing to glance back at Seungmin, though you felt the warmth of his gaze lingering on you longer than necessary.

As the snowflakes thickened, floating gently through the firelit air, Chan finally stood, rubbing his gloved hands together. "Alright, team, time to head in before we freeze."

A chorus of playful complaints rose immediately, but Chan, ever practical, simply shook his head with a smile. "Tomorrow’s snow-day chaos will be more fun if we actually survive the night."

Slowly, everyone rose, stamping cold feet and dusting snow off jackets. Seungmin stood across from you, eyes briefly meeting yours again over the dying embers. He hesitated a moment, as if considering something, then gave you the slightest nod, quiet acknowledgment passing silently between you.

You nodded back subtly, not fully sure what had changed, only knowing that it had—just a little, just enough.

Together, the group trudged toward the warm glow of the cabin windows, laughter and teasing trailing behind you like footprints in the fresh snow.

By the time you climbed the stairs to the loft, the cozy warmth from downstairs had already faded, leaving behind only the chill of the mountain night. Through the thin walls, you could still hear the faint sounds of laughter as the others settled into their rooms, a comforting murmur that only underscored the awkward quiet now stretching between you and Seungmin.

He moved around the room methodically, setting his phone carefully on the bedside table, stacking books with precise corners aligned, pulling a charger from his bag with practiced efficiency. His calm organization seemed almost exaggerated in contrast to your own quiet hesitation, and you found yourself watching him, half-irritated, half-curious.

“Are you always this meticulous?” you asked finally, breaking the silence as you unpacked your pajamas, trying to keep your voice casual.

He glanced up, eyebrows raised slightly. “Does it bother you?”

You paused, considering his question for a beat longer than you intended. “It’s…intense.”

He smiled faintly, clearly amused. “I prefer ‘efficient.’”

“Of course you do.” Your reply slipped out dry and automatic, prompting another quick twitch of his lips.

Turning your back, you changed quickly, trying to ignore the prickling awareness of Seungmin moving quietly behind you, the rustle of fabric as he slipped into sweats and a faded university hoodie. When you turned around again, he was already climbing under the quilt, sitting up against the headboard with a book in hand. The image felt strangely intimate, far more so than you’d prepared yourself for.

Swallowing awkwardness, you slid into your own side of the bed, carefully pulling the blankets around you, leaving a deliberate space in the center as if to mark an invisible boundary. Seungmin noticed but said nothing, simply flipping a page, seemingly absorbed in whatever he was reading.

Silence stretched again, softened only by the gentle sound of snowflakes tapping rhythmically on the skylight above your heads. You found yourself hyper-aware of every sound—his slow breathing, the faint rustling of pages, your own pulse thudding in your ears. It felt oddly tense and yet strangely peaceful at the same time.

Finally, he placed his book on the nightstand, clicking off the small lamp and plunging the room into quiet darkness. You lay still, staring upward into shadow, your thoughts spinning quietly. Sleep felt miles away, your mind refusing to settle, body stubbornly shivering despite the layers of blankets.

Several minutes passed—maybe more—when you heard Seungmin exhale softly, clearly not asleep either. His voice drifted quietly from the darkness, low and tinged with reluctant amusement.

“You realize you’re shaking the whole bed, right?”

“Sorry,” you mumbled, embarrassment heating your cheeks even in the dark. “It’s colder than I thought.”

A moment passed, then you felt the blankets shift as he moved beside you. Before you could ask, the gentle weight of another layer settled over your shoulders—his fleece blanket, still warm from his side of the bed. You froze for a moment, surprised at the small act of kindness.

“Don’t overthink it,” he said quietly, as if reading your hesitation. “If you freeze to death, I'll have to explain it to everyone.”

You relaxed slightly, grateful for the way humor eased some of the awkwardness. “How thoughtful.”

He hummed softly in reply—a gentle, amused sound that vibrated through the silence, relaxing your tense shoulders a little further.

Quiet settled back around you again, this time softer, easier. Your shivering slowly eased, replaced by the comforting warmth of shared blankets and quiet breaths syncing unconsciously in the dark.

Just before sleep began pulling at your consciousness, his voice came again, barely above a whisper. “Better?”

“Much,” you murmured quietly. “Thank you.”

There was a pause, and you felt him shift slightly closer, not enough to bridge the gap between you, just enough that you felt his presence more clearly beside you.

“Sleep well,” he finally whispered, voice softer than you'd ever heard it.

You smiled slightly in the dark, letting yourself relax fully for the first time all evening. “You too, Seungmin.”

As you drifted off, warmth cocooning you comfortably now, you wondered briefly at how something as simple as a borrowed blanket had shifted the boundaries you thought you'd clearly drawn—softening a rivalry into something much harder to define.

The cabin woke late the next morning, lulled by thick snowfall and the promise of no real schedule. Sunlight filtered through the frost-glazed windows, bouncing off snowbanks stacked like walls around the house.

You lingered in the loft a little longer than usual, reluctant to leave the cocoon of warmth and blankets. Seungmin had already slipped out, quiet as always, and by the time you joined the others in the kitchen, Felix was declaring war.

“I’m serious,” he said, tossing a pair of gloves at Jisung. “Full-blown snowball fight. Team rules, field boundaries, the works.”

“Didn’t you almost cry last year when Hyunjin hit you in the face?” Jeongin teased, dodging a sock Felix hurled in retaliation.

“I’ll wear goggles,” Felix declared.

“It’s happening,” Chan said around a mouthful of toast, barely hiding his grin. “No backing out.”

The teams formed quickly, almost instinctively—Chan, Jisung, and you on one side; Seungmin, Hyunjin, and Changbin on the other. Felix declared himself the ‘official cameraman,’ strapping on his GoPro like a war correspondent and giving a serious nod.

Outside, the snow was soft but deep, perfect for ammo. The teams split to opposite sides of the yard, forming makeshift forts behind sleds, overturned bins, and chunks of fallen branches. Breath fogged in the air. The only rule: no mercy.

You launched the first snowball—direct hit to Changbin’s back.

He yelped. “Oh it’s on!”

Chaos erupted.

Seungmin was strategic—calculating angles, leading attacks, covering Hyunjin’s blind side with frustrating precision. He dodged with ease, barely mussing his hair, which irritated you far more than it should have.

“Can you at least pretend you’re having fun?” you yelled, packing another snowball as fast as you could.

“I am having fun,” he replied calmly. “Watching you miss.”

Your next throw veered wide, and you hissed under your breath.

“Rough morning?” he teased.

You gave him a look that promised revenge.

Jisung was hit mid-dash and collapsed in the snow for dramatic effect, yelling, “Tell my story!” as Chan pulled him to safety. Hyunjin slipped, face-planted, and popped up with a snow-beard that sent everyone into laughter. Somewhere in the chaos, Jeongin switched teams, claiming it was for “balance” but mostly for fun.

You spotted Seungmin crouched near the porch and sprinted for cover—only to misjudge your step on a slick patch of ice. Your foot flew out from under you, and you landed hard on one knee. Pain spiked immediately, sharp and burning.

“Shit—”

The laughter stopped.

Seungmin was at your side before you could even brush the snow off. He didn’t say anything at first, just crouched, eyes scanning your face and the awkward angle of your knee.

“Stop moving,” he said, voice clipped but low.

“I’m fine,” you muttered, even as your hands trembled slightly in the cold.

“You’re not,” he said, slipping a gloved hand beneath your arm to steady you. “Can you stand?”

You nodded, but the second you shifted weight onto your leg, pain shot up your thigh. You hissed, and without another word, Seungmin pulled your arm over his shoulders and lifted you partially off the ground, supporting your weight as if you didn’t weigh a thing.

Felix abandoned his post to open the cabin door while the rest trailed in behind you. Inside, warmth hit you like a wave, along with the low murmur of concern.

Chan brought ice. Felix fetched painkillers. Hyunjin patted your head like a scolded puppy.

“Nothing’s broken,” Chan said after checking you over. “Just a nasty bruise.”

You offered a stiff nod, pulling the blanket Felix draped around your shoulders tighter.

Everyone laughed when Hyunjin replayed the GoPro footage of your fall in slow motion—except Seungmin, who leaned against the far wall, arms crossed.

“She’d have dodged if she trained more than her sarcasm,” he muttered when Changbin jokingly called him a hero for rushing in.

The room laughed. You didn’t.

Your throat tightened. You didn’t meet Seungmin’s eyes. Instead, you offered Felix a strained smile as he handed you a hot drink, grateful for the excuse to look anywhere else.

He hadn’t meant it cruelly—not exactly. But it hit in a way nothing he’d said before had. Maybe because he was supposed to be the one who noticed when he went too far.

You sipped the cocoa, staring at the steam curling above it. The laughter around you resumed, but it no longer felt as warm.

Dinner prep fell to you and Seungmin. Of course it did.

Chan claimed he was on firewood duty. Jisung and Felix volunteered for playlist curation, which somehow turned into a hallway dance-off. The rest conveniently vanished to “tidy up” or “take inventory,” which you knew just meant avoiding the awkward silence brewing between you and the guy currently chopping garlic like it had personally offended him.

You stood at the stove, wooden spoon stirring pasta that had long since finished cooking. The steam fogged the tiny kitchen window, leaving only your reflection staring back—tight mouth, unreadable eyes.

“You’re still mad,” Seungmin said without looking up.

“I'm not mad,” you replied too quickly, too sharp. “I’m fine.”

He glanced at you then, long enough to see through it. “Right.”

You tightened your grip on the spoon. “Why would I be mad? You just embarrassed me in front of everyone and made a cheap jab while I was literally in pain. That’s nothing, right?”

The air shifted.

He set the knife down slowly, wiping his hands on a towel as he turned toward you. “It was a joke.”

You scoffed. “No, it wasn’t. You meant it. You always mean it. The sarcasm, the digs—they’re not always harmless, Seungmin.”

His jaw tensed. “I thought that’s how we worked.”

“Yeah, well,” you said, blinking quickly. “Maybe I’m tired of being the joke.”

That landed. You saw it in the way his mouth parted slightly, like he wanted to say something but didn’t know how.

The pot bubbled over. You moved to shut off the heat, wiping at the mess with shaky hands.

He stepped forward, voice lower now. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“But you did.” You didn’t raise your voice. You didn’t need to. The disappointment clung heavier than anger.

“I don’t know how to…” he trailed off, fingers tightening around the edge of the counter. “Sometimes I say things because I don’t know what to say when it actually matters.”

You exhaled slowly, finally turning to face him fully.

“I’m not asking you to say the right thing. Just don’t say the thing that makes it worse.”

He nodded, quiet, gaze falling to the floor.

The door creaked open behind you.

“Dinner smelling good in here?” Felix called out cheerfully, poking his head in.

You stepped aside, gesturing toward the food. “Yeah. It’s done.”

The others filed in, laughter and music quickly filling the kitchen again. You and Seungmin didn’t speak for the rest of the meal. Not out of spite, but something quieter. Something still mending.

He passed you the salt once. You said thanks. He didn’t correct your pasta portion like he normally would. You didn’t tease him about his precision chopping.

Small things. But different.

After the dishes were cleared, you slipped back upstairs early, your bruised knee aching and your mind heavier than you cared to admit.

You expected the cold. The silence. The usual friction.

What you didn’t expect was a soft knock at the door an hour later.

The knock was gentle—barely there. But the cabin was quiet now, most of the others tucked away in their rooms, laughter from earlier faded into sleepy murmurs behind closed doors. You were sitting cross-legged on the bed, hoodie wrapped tight around you, your knee propped up on a pillow, phone screen dimmed to black long ago.

The door creaked open just enough for Seungmin to peek in, candle in hand, his hoodie sleeves pulled down past his palms.

“The power’s out,” he said quietly. “Storm took it.”

You nodded once, voice caught somewhere in your chest.

He hesitated—then stepped inside.

“I brought this,” he added, holding the candle forward. The warm glow cast soft shadows across his face, making his usual sharp features look a little gentler. “Couldn’t find the lanterns.”

You reached out, fingers brushing his as you took it. He didn’t let go right away.

“You okay?” he asked finally, gaze dropping briefly to your knee.

“I’ll live,” you muttered, setting the candle down on the nightstand. “Not sure about the ego though.”

He gave a soft laugh, just enough to break the quiet tension.

“I was out of line,” he said, voice low. “I know I was.”

You didn’t say anything, just watched him as he stood awkwardly near the end of the bed, like he wasn’t sure if he should sit or leave.

“I didn’t mean to say something that would stick like that,” he continued, rubbing the back of his neck. “But the truth is… I don’t always know how to talk to you.”

That surprised you.

“You always seem so sure,” you said slowly.

“I fake it,” he replied, smiling ruefully. “I thought poking at you was the only way I could… get to you.”

You blinked. “Get to me?”

He finally sat down on the edge of the bed, facing away slightly, hands braced on his knees. “Yeah. Like maybe if I kept pushing, you’d push back. You always do. And I’d know where I stood.”

You looked at him carefully. “And where do you want to stand?”

He turned to meet your gaze then, expression open for once—not defensive, not sarcastic. Just honest.

“Closer,” he said. “If you’ll let me.”

Your heart thudded unevenly in your chest.

“You don’t make this easy,” you whispered.

“I never said I was easy,” he murmured, voice low. “But I meant what I said earlier—I didn’t want to hurt you. I just… I don’t always know how to show when I care.”

The candle flickered beside you, painting golden light across the quilt. The air between you shifted again, quieter now—like the moments that come after storms, when the world feels new and tentative.

You reached for the blanket between you, tugging it slightly so he’d get the hint. He blinked once—surprised—but didn’t hesitate to shift under it with you.

You lay side by side in silence, the closeness unfamiliar but not unwelcome. His knee brushed yours, and this time, you didn’t move away.

“You’re warm,” you muttered sleepily, voice softer now.

He chuckled under his breath. “You sound surprised.”

“I am,” you replied honestly. “You give off strong cold-shoulder energy.”

Seungmin smiled. “Maybe just for everyone else.”

The silence returned—not heavy, not awkward. Just quiet, and kind. And slowly, as the candle burned lower, your eyes began to fall closed.

Just as sleep tugged at you, you felt his fingers brush lightly against yours beneath the blanket. Barely touching. But there.

“Goodnight, Y/N,” he whispered, voice a warm hush against the cold night.

You didn’t answer. But your fingers curled softly against his. That was enough.

It was hard to say how long the two of you had been lying there, but the storm outside had calmed. Only a few stray gusts still rattled the windowpane, and the candle had burned itself down to a waxy stub on the nightstand.

You thought Seungmin had fallen asleep. His breathing had gone quiet, even. But then—

“You’re still awake,” he said, voice low, barely above the hush of the wind.

You turned your head slightly, your cheek grazing the pillow. “So are you.”

“Yeah.” A pause. “Been thinking.”

You shifted slightly to face him, just enough to see his profile in the pale blue-gray light leaking in through the curtain. His brow was relaxed, but his lips were drawn tight—like he was holding something in.

“About what?”

A long pause.

“…That maybe I don’t want to go back to the way things were,” he said.

Your breath caught a little. You weren’t sure what you expected him to say, but it wasn’t that.

Seungmin kept his eyes on the ceiling, but his voice was steady now. “All we ever did was get on each other’s nerves. But the last couple days… I don’t know. You don’t feel that shift?”

You did. You had.

And it scared you a little.

“Maybe,” you said, your voice quieter now.

He finally turned to look at you fully. The space between you had narrowed over the past hour without you realizing. Now, your faces were inches apart, pillows cradling your heads at the same level, the blankets pulled up to your shoulders like a shared secret.

Your gaze flicked to his mouth for just a second—just a second—and you could feel the tension rise instantly.

Not uncomfortable. Just heavy with something new.

Seungmin’s voice dropped even lower. “You keep looking at me like that.”

“Like what?”

“Like you want me to do something about it.”

You felt your chest tighten. “Do you?”

His lips quirked—not in his usual sarcastic way. Just the faintest smile, touched with nervousness. “I might.”

His hand moved beneath the blanket, fingers brushing yours, pinkies hooking without full contact. You could feel your heart hammering, your skin humming.

And then he shifted forward, barely closing the distance. His forehead nearly touched yours, breath ghosting across your lips. You could feel everything—the pause, the hesitation, the hope. Your eyes fluttered shut for a moment.

And that’s when you asked, barely above a whisper—

“Were you just about to kiss me?”

Seungmin’s voice came just as soft, just as close. “…Was kind of hoping you’d beat me to it.”

You opened your eyes, and for a heartbeat, neither of you moved.

Then there were footsteps in the hallway. A floorboard creaked, someone’s voice muttering half-asleep.

Seungmin pulled back just enough to breathe. Not retreating, not hiding—just waiting. Respectful. Intent.

You smiled faintly, heart still pounding. “Maybe tomorrow.”

He nodded, voice warm and low. “Yeah. Tomorrow.”

You didn’t fall asleep right away—but you didn’t feel the cold anymore either.

[nadvs]

OMG power play is one of my fav series .. like im sad its over but i was wondering if you can do rafe and reader seeing each other again after being apart for a while yk , maybe he surprises her or she surprises him idk (smut?) but ugh i love them n you ty babes😛

aw thank you ily!! this is so cute and omg the smut potential!! it’s another filthy one, y’all 👀 blurb set in the power play au. 18+!

You were tempted the entire three-hour drive over to give in and call Rafe and just tell him that you’d be at his house tonight.

As you step into the Camerons’ backyard, the summer sky a deep black against the twinkling string lights draped across the foliage, you’re glad you managed to resist.

You can’t wait to see the look on your boyfriend’s face.

You originally had to decline the invitation to his sister’s 18th birthday party, but when your travel plans with your friends unexpectedly fell through, you decided to come and keep it a surprise.

You navigate through the massive crowd to greet Sarah, who you’d texted about your plan. You give her a big hug and a gift, then kindly day hello to all her friends.

When you ask her where Rafe is, she points towards the back of the expansive backyard, assuring you that she kept your secret.

You weave through groups of people, and when your eyes land on your boyfriend, you take a moment to just look at him. He’s standing among his friends, a beer in his hand, pulling you in without even having to try.

You love how when he wears t-shirts, his biceps jut out the sleeves, how the outline of his broad chest is clear beneath the fabric. His usually tousled hair is neatly pushed back, the planes of his face strong, the cut of his jaw sharp.

You still can’t believe all you’ve been through together in the eight months you’ve known him, that he started off as just a guy with a bad attitude that you had to meet at the library once a week.

You never would have expected to fall for him, and to fall so hard, and you’re so glad you did. He may be different than you in so many ways, but you think that’s what makes you two work so well.

Rafe pulls his phone out, glancing at it just to pocket it again, surely wondering why you haven’t texted back in the last hour. He asked you when you were leaving for your trip tonight, and you haven’t responded.

It’s a jarring feeling, seeing him as who he is without you, seeing that he does the same things you do when you’re apart. It’s been a month since you’ve been together in person.

As you approach, he turns away, taking long strides to the bar. You follow, the anticipation making your heart race.

You settle by the bar beside him, his attention turned the other way. You almost forgot how much he towers over you, how big he is.

“Hey, do you have a girlfriend?” you tease, placing a hand on his forearm.

“Yes,” Rafe answers sharply, pulling away before even looking at you. When his eyes land on you, his face quickly changes from frustration to awe.

“Too bad,” you beam up at him.

“What are…”

He doesn’t finish his sentence. In seconds, he transforms from the cold grump he was when you met him to the loving man you know he is as he pulls you into a bearhug.

“Ouch,” you giggle when his grip is a little too tight, the rich notes of his cologne dancing over your nose.

“Sorry,” he half-whispers, pulling back to search your face with wide, softened eyes. “I thought you were leaving for your trip tonight.”

“Plans fell through,” you reply. “I wanted to surprise you. And I have to say, I really like how rude you were when you thought I was some girl hitting on you.”

Rafe smirks, the sudden, unexpected dopamine hit of seeing still radiating through him. He can’t believe this is real.

“It’s so good to see you, baby,” he says. “Like this.”

“And not on a screen for once,” you agree with a big smile. “How’s your night going?”

“So much better now,” he replies. He leans down to kiss your temple. You curl into him, your cheek against his chest, cozying into his warm embrace.

All it takes is his hand dragging down your shoulder, over your waist, squeezing your hip, for his body to tighten with desire.

“You wanna go to my room?” he murmurs into your ear.

You chuckle, craning your neck to meet his eyes, your stomach numbing with excitement.

“What about the party?” you flirt.

“It’ll be here when we get back.”

He keeps his heavy arm around your shoulders, his smile refusing to fade, as you sneak away undetected from the other partygoers.

You’ve already been in his bedroom once, but before you can make a joke about needing a tour, he has you against his closed door, kissing you deeply, your face in his big hands.

His kisses quickly get hungrier, faster, his length already firm against you, nudging your stomach.

“Tell me you have something,” Rafe murmurs against your mouth, the room still plunged in darkness.

“I didn’t expect this to happen,” you whisper through a gentle laugh. “Do you not have any left?”

“We finished the box up last time.”

“Wow,” you say. To be fair, you do have to use up quite a lot of condoms on your rare nights together. “It’s okay. I have something else in mind.”

Your hand trails down his firm body, stopping at the bulge beneath his jeans, rubbing, earning a sharp inhale.

He’s gone down on you plenty of times, but you’ve never done it to him. You’re nervous; everything is still so new to you. But you’ve been wanting to do this for a long time.

You start to unbuckle his belt, and once he realizes what’s happening, he’s using all of his self-control to not take over and pull his pants off as quickly as he can.

“You might need to teach me a little,” you whisper.

“That’s fine,” he rasps. “We both know how good you listen.”

The praise makes your heart skip a beat, your hands trembling as you tug down his zipper. You pull his pants down, lowering to your knees as you do it, the swelling under his boxers eye-level to you now.

Rafe gazes down at you, in awe of quickly his night went from missing you, empty, wishing you were here, to his lips buzzing from your kiss, looking down at you in the dimness of his bedroom, watching you palm his cock.

You bite your lip as you pull down his boxers and his hard arousal springs out for you.

You hold him at his base, eyes locked on his as you press a gentle, open-mouthed kiss on the swollen head of his cock.

“Fuck,” he groans. Everything he does with you manages to be hot and filthy, but sweet and tender, too, and it wasn’t until he was with you that he realized what making love really meant.

Your mouth widens with your kisses, tasting his salty precome, covering him in wet warmth.

“You can spit on it,” he rasps, his fingers lacing at the roots of your hair.

You obey, dribbling spit onto his tip, swirling your tongue over him. His knees are already weak, his grip on your hair tighter.

“Just like that,” Rafe whispers. “Get it wet with your hand.”

You stroke him gently, his shaft getting slick with your saliva, gazing up at him.

“Should I put it all in my mouth?” you ask.

He groans, in heaven when you talk like that.

“As much as you can,” he tells you.

You nod, clenching your thighs together from how turned on you are. You sink all the way to the base, gently gagging when he hits the back of your throat, your nose pressed against his skin.

Rafe’s body is on fire from how hot and wet your mouth is around him. You slowly pull back, moving with the curve of his cock, your lips smacking off with a quiet pop, then take him in again.

You start to add more suction, bobbing a little faster, your lips locked around his shaft.

“Yeah,” he breathes. “Suck harder. You can do it.”

Your cheeks hollow as you listen to his instructions, softly gagging every time you reach his base, making his head fuzzy with euphoria.

“Stroke it, too,” he says.

Your grip on his base loosens just a bit as you gently twist your hand around him, following your mouth as it goes up and down.

“Good girl,” he whispers. “Go faster.”

Your bobs pick up in speed, his fist in your hair as he guides you to move the way he wants you to, your mouth and hand full of him, eyes squeezing shut from how hot this is.

Rafe gently bucks his hips forward as you suck and lick and moan, his cock getting even harder as he gets close to his orgasm.

“I need to get a towel or something,” he says through a strained whisper. You pull off, gazing up at him, putting your other hand on his bare thigh.

“I can swallow,” you promise.

It sends him over the edge. He puts his hand over yours, guiding his cock back into your mouth, and in only two more pumps, his gut tightens and he comes so hard that he sees stars.

He fills your mouth and you feel his hand go to your other hand, lacing his fingers in yours as he finishes with an intoxicating groan.

You pull off of him last time, sucking hard although your jaw is sore, taking everything he offered.

Rafe doesn’t waste a moment to collect you off the floor, cupping your jaw, breathlessly kissing your lips over and over, his chest heaving.

“Thank you,” he whispers, his words rushing out. “Not just for that. For being here. You made my night so much better, baby. I missed you so much.”

“Me, too,” you whisper. “You’re not mad I didn’t tell you?”

“Mad?” he echoes with a chuckle. “Slap me if I ever get mad at you for anything ever again.”

“I will never take you up on that offer,” you laugh.

Rafe smirks, his head swimming, his heart pounding, staring at you like you put the sun in the sky. Because to him, it feels like you did. You gave him light he always needed, showing him every day what it’s like to give his heart to someone who knows how to take care of it.

[alwayslurkinginthebackground]

Ginger Ale - A Joel Miller Drabble

Pairing: No Outbreak Joel Miller x reader Rating: Sigh - fluff again. Word Count: 2932 a/n: I started working on this one weeks ago and kept picking it back up and putting it back down until the last of it finally worked its way out of my head this week, just in time for our collective mental breakdown. :)

You're not sure who else to call, not when you'd only arrived in Texas a few months ago and know maybe a handful of people in the entire state, but desperate times call for desperate measures.

Not that it slows the beating of your heart when you hit the call button.

You'd met Joel and Sarah the day you moved in, when you'd been struggling to get your bed frame through the front door. The younger Miller had appeared to offer her help, and between the two of you the frame was quickly set in place. Joel found his way over soon after in search of his daughter, and in the weeks that followed, you'd both begun to toe a line that neither of you seemed ready to cross, not fully at least. Chance encounters at your mailboxes, your offer to help Sarah with homework, his to fix up the fence in your yard. Stuck in a delicate balance that has you ridden with anxiety at the mere thought of hearing his voice. Thankfully, when the other end of the line clicks on, it's Sarah that answers.

"Hey Sarah," you start, but you're only able to get two words out before a cough consumes your entire body. It overtakes you completely for a moment as you struggle to let yourself breathe.

Sarah responds before you catch your breath. "You're sick."

"You guessed it," you laugh, careful not to trigger another fit of coughing. "I've been down for the count all day, but do you think you could do me a favor?"

"Of course!" Sarah eagerly replies, and you can't help but smile. It's been evident in the short amount of time you've known her that the teenager is eager to prove herself, and you have a sneaking suspicion that your arrival in their lives also provided an opportunity for her to be helpful to someone other than her father and uncle. "What do you need? Kleenex? Soup? Crackers? When I get sick usually my dad gives me ginger ale and..."

"Soup would be lovely," you reply gently, unwilling to tell her that you already have a cabinet full of canned chicken noodle and that the purpose of your call is to ask her father for something. "Is your dad still at work?"

Her response comes with a slight side of attitude, one that you know has nothing to do with you and everything to do with the fact that Joel works incredibly hard to support them both. You catch his truck rolling into the driveway late most nights, and while you're aware that Sarah understands, and that Joel loves her more than anything, you also know that it doesn't make it any easier for either of them. "Yeah. He promised he'd be home by eight."

"Do you think you could give him a call and see if he'd grab me some cold medicine?" you ask, anxiety suddenly spiking. It's a perfectly normal request, and you're in no state to drive, already dizzy just from standing to make the phone call, but it still feels like a step too far. "It's alright if he can't though," you add at the last second.

"I'll call him and check. He probably will though because it's for you."

Sarah's comment catches you off guard, but she doesn't give you time to contemplate, already onto asking you what kind of soup you'd prefer before promising to be back soon with everything you need.

By the time you make it back to the couch, your head is spinning, both from the sickness and the suggestion that while Joel wouldn't do this for just anyone, he would do it for you. Sarah's words echo in your mind until she appears on your doorstep, an overflowing shopping bag in hand. She launches into an explanation of everything she got you before she's even through the door - tissues and cough drops, multiple flavors because she wasn't sure which you'd like best, and snacks galore. "To make you feel better," she insists when she pulls the cookies out last, the grin on her face doing more than the sweets ever would to make you feel better.

After insisting that you drink the ginger ale that she brought like it's some kind of miracle cure, you shoo her out, intent on preventing her from catching whatever it is you have. Reluctantly, she heads home, but not without the assurance that she'd call in a couple of hours and that her dad would drop by with the medicine on his way home, just as she figured he would.

Once the door is closed behind her, the remainder of your evening passes in a hazy blur. Sarah does call to check on you, but then you're passed out on the couch, your body suddenly too weary to do anything else.

It's a heavy knock at the door that jolts you back awake.

It takes you a moment, long enough that he knocks twice more, before you make it to your front entry, unlocking and swinging the door open with the last bit of energy you seem to have left. "Hey Joel," you sniffle, willing yourself not to cough.

"You look like shit."

"Straight to the chase, Miller," you frown, rolling your eyes before they land on the bag in his hand. "Is that my medicine?"

Joel looks down as though he's completely forgotten what he's here for, grumbling a bit as he holds it out to you, "per the doctor's order."

You take it gratefully, turning on your heel to head to the kitchen, but the action causes your head to spin and you stumble, barely catching yourself with a hand against the wall.

"Hey, slow down," Joel warns immediately, his voice dripping with concern as he steadies you with firm hands on your waist. "You okay?"

Nausea spikes in your stomach, just a symptom of the way the world is spinning more than anything else, and for a moment you wonder if you're about to throw up on him. "Yeah, I'm fine...just a bit dizzy."

Your vision continues to turn about as he guides you back toward the couch, settling you down before taking the bag back from you. "I'm gonna get you some water, alright?"

You nod again, dropping your head into your hands as you ward off the black at the edge of your vision. You can hear him rummaging through your kitchen cabinets as you sit, and the next thing you know he's back at your side, ripping open a package of the medicine so he can hand it to you with the glass of water.

"Thank you," you whisper, trying to ignore the way your fingers brush against his. "And uh...thanks for doing this. For getting the medicine, that is," you continue awkwardly, avoiding eye contact as you swallow the pills. "Let me know what I owe you for what Sarah got me earlier, too."

He shakes his head. "Don't worry about it. Thank you for letting her help. You could've just had me pick everything up but you didn't."

"She's a good kid, Joel," you remind him with a soft smile, the authenticity of your statement requiring you to finally meet his gaze because you know that just as much as Sarah wants to feel helpful and independent, he needs the occasional reminder that he's doing a good job as her dad.

There's a beat of silence, the two of you sitting quietly on your couch, before he clears his throat. "You gonna be alright?"

"I've survived this long," you tease him, even if at the next moment the world begins to sway again. He watches carefully, worry still evident. "I'll be fine," you reassure him again.

He doesn't look convinced, staring at you with an unreadable expression until he sucks in a breath. "I'm gonna go over and let Sarah know I'm gonna keep an eye on..."

You're suddenly short of breath as you're left to stare at him like a deer in the headlights. "You don't have to..."

"I want to," he cuts you off, tone firm, and it's enough for you to reluctantly agree. He leaves a moment later, promising that he'll check in on Sarah and be back soon, only departing after giving you clear instructions to stay put on the couch. You follow them easily, wrapping yourself in a blanket as you hit play on You've Got Mail for the third time today.

The movie is barely a half hour in by the time he's back through the door.

"Sarah okay?" you ask instantly, guilt creeping in that instead of spending his night with his daughter, he's about to spend it with you.

Joel nods, hands on his hips. "She's fine. Worried about you more than anything else, I think." You hum a response, too weary to do much else, but then the tension begins to fill the room again. You focus on the screen as he continues to stand in the doorway, like neither of you are quite sure what move to make next.

"I could get you some soup, if you'd like," he offers, toeing off his boots and turning toward the kitchen before you can even respond.

"Soup would be nice," you call out, "and maybe one of those ginger ales that Sarah brought earlier?"

His head pops back up the doorway, laughing. "She brought you some of that? I used to pretend it was real medicine that she'd have to take after the actual stuff just to stop her grumbling."

"Did it work?" you ask as you watch him move back into your kitchen like it's the most natural thing in the world.

"Like a charm," he shouts back before reappearing a moment later to place a can of the soda on the table in front of you. If he notices the flush that rises to your cheeks, you're hopeful that you can pass it off as a fever, but he doesn't linger long enough to say anything, returning to the kitchen with the intent of getting something of substance into you.

The movie plays on as he brings you both food, dropping to the couch next to you despite your protests that he'll catch your cold. He does maintain a respectable distance between you, but he looks comfortable, and you curse the universe for making this the situation in which Joel Miller is sitting across from you. It could've been any other circumstance, but instead you look and feel like death and he's next to you eating soup.

It's almost domestic, the way he takes your dishes back to the kitchen when you're done, washing them like he's done it a hundred times before. You're half asleep by the time he gets back, but he maintains the distance, saying nothing as your eyes flicker closed and he hits play on the move again.

When you wake it's to the repeated sound of the main title screen. The living room has grown dark, and for the first time all day you realize that you're comfortable. The pressure on your chest has eased, your nose seems clearer, and you're no longer freezing.

In fact, you're warm.

It's only when you become conscious of the arm slung around your waist and the legs tangled with your own that you realize why.

Joel Miller is no longer just on your couch. You're sprawled out on top of him.

Your head is settled softly on his chest, and under any other circumstance its slow rise and fall would likely be soothing enough to lull you back to sleep. Instead, you panic, immediately attempting to extract yourself from his grip.

"Go back to sleep," he mumbles, roused by your movement, and it's unclear if the way his arm tightens around you is something he's conscious of.

With hands positioned on either side of his head, you push yourself up. "Fuck, I'm so sorry, Joel. I didn't mean to..."

"Will you cut it out?" he assures you with a deep laugh, his eyes finally opening to meet yours as he runs a hand up and down your back, the motion causing you to freeze.

"But I fell asleep on you and you should've been home hours ago and I'm so sorry and..."

"Stop. Apologizing," he urges you again. You open your mouth to continue your protesting, but he cuts you off once more, "it was the only way I could get you to stop coughing in your sleep."

"Oh," you reply simply, and then you're letting him slowly pull your body back against his. You say nothing more as you settle your head against his chest, although your breathing remains erratic as you try to count just how many lines have been crossed tonight. When you'd called Sarah that afternoon it was just for a favor, and now you've gone from nervously asking your neighbor to buy you medicine to passing out on top of him.

Now, it feels like everything that's been lingering between you for months is finally coming to a head.

Joel continues to run his fingers up and down along your spine in some sort of lazy pattern, his other hand carefully tucking the blanket back around you both. The couch isn't really big enough for both of you, but with your body settled between his legs and his arms keeping you securely on top of him, he makes it work.

"You stayed," you whisper when the quiet becomes too much, your heart still pounding hard enough that you wonder if he can feel it too.

"I told you I wanted to," he replies just before you swear he presses his lips to the crown of your head.

"What about Sarah?" you question further. "Don't you need to get home? It's..." you glance at the clock on the wall, "fuck, Joel, it's nearly two in the morning."

"And? I told you I was going to stay and I did. Plus, I wasn't about to leave you here dying."

You frown. "It's just a cold," you point out, because it's not like you're actually in any imminent danger, especially not after the medicine has calmed some of your symptoms. Well, either that or the nap you just took against him or perhaps the ginger ale Sarah swears by. "You should get home."

There's silence again, but his movement doesn't cease, hand still trailing across your back. "I should, shouldn't I?" he agrees eventually, even though there's nothing about his voice that's convincing.

"Yeah," you repeat, even though you were the one to suggest it and you also haven't done anything to move from where you're draped across his chest. In a way, it seems almost easier to stay secure in his embrace than to confront the realities that will crash over both of you when you part. The questioning of what he's really doing here, on your couch, and why he was so intent on staying. Why Sarah had said earlier that he'd do it just for you.

Never mind the ease you feel now that he's here.

You can hear the seconds tick by on his watch, but neither of you move. Your breathing evens out to the point where you start to feel the heavy tug of your eyelids, and just before you will yourself to move, you press yourself just a bit closer. Your cheek flush against his chest like you're certain you'll never have this feeling again and you want to cling to it for just a moment longer.

He doesn't say anything when you do pull back, and he remains quiet as you untangle yourself from him to stand. The cough returns almost instantly, lungs wheezing when you double over, and you don't flinch when his hand rubs between your shoulder blades to ease your breathing.

When it calms, you step away, Joel's hand falling back. He mimics you, standing and hesitating before grabbing the blanket from the couch to wrap around your frame. There's something in his expression that you try not to read into, but the hope that blossoms in your chest betrays you anyway.

Not that there's anything you can do about it. Nothing you can say, nothing to do other than to continue treading the fine line.

"Thank you again," you say softly as he tugs his boots back on by the door, "for the medicine and for staying."

"Don't worry about it. Thanks for letting Sarah help, too," he responds, his words echoing earlier statements.

"She's welcome over here any time," you reply immediately, only to fail at containing the next words that spill from your lips, "you both are."

Joel smiles, warmth radiating from him as he slowly reaches to tug the blanket around your shoulders a little tighter, the silence settling as you both seem to push off the inevitable. Eventually, though, he shifts, fingers reaching for the doorknob, the door swinging open, his boots hitting the porch outside. It happens quickly, and you simultaneously feel like something has ended as something else begins.

This evening, the unspoken words, the way he'd held you so carefully, paving the path for the potential of something. Nights in his arms, Sarah at your kitchen table, ginger ale when one of you is sick. All of it suddenly on the horizon in a way you'd only let yourself fantasize about before.

He's halfway down your walk before you stop him. "Joel?"

"Yeah?" he pauses, turning back with an expression seemingly just as hopeful as your own.

"Tell Sarah the ginger ale helped."

[bbycake2]

ok… so we MIGHT need more nerd!Armin chz wthhhh😩⁉️⁉️

Hi!! Thank u sm <3 Here you go I really like the idea of him being disgusting and perverted idkk.. maybe thats my own thing (sorry if its too weird) . Hope you gonna like it tho ‎⋆˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ 𐙚 ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ ˚𝜗𝜚˚₊˚⊹♡

Stalker, pervert, disgusting, kidnapper, again rape (sorry) violence, blood NerdyArmin!Reader

A boy your age recently moved in next door to you. You can’t really say anything about him since he never leaves his fucking apartment, and when he does he always looks the same, does he ever wash these clothes? - You laughed to yourself

Your mom says hes probably the purest ever, innocent looks, manners and doing nothing wrong, zero parties, alcohol or loud friends… zero friends in general. He always wears his backpack full of books, chemistry, math, science… manga, wait manga? not only a nerd but also a weeb? Couldn’t be worse

For some time now you have noticed that panties are disappearing from the clothes dryer on the balcony. Weirdly, his balcony is next to yours, you can practically reach from his balcony to yours and vice versa. Odd coincidence, isnt it? I dont even know him, I just cant accuse him of such a thing just because hes “weird”, im too paranoid

Beautiful morning, sun is up and the sky is clear. You decided to went outside for a quick walk. Youre wearing those tight shorts made for working out and a simple top, it’s hot after all. One two three, one two three, you’re doing some stretching, bending down to touch the sidewalk with your hands, such a relief, your back feels lighter than ever…. You almost screamed and flinched when you saw the blonde guy with glasses standing behind you, was he there the whole time? “Sorry I didn't want to scare you, im just making my way to the library” - His voice is way too innocent, he passed you by leaving you behind, alone and confused. some time has passed, you are in the forest continuing your walk, listening to music and just enjoying the moment. Wait what was that? Im too fucking paranoid right? You swore you just saw the blonde fucking haircut behind the tree. It was so scary that you decided to start walkingk in the opposite direction, being too scared to confront the stranger person or a thing you just saw. Fuck you can feel him following you, hes just behind. No fucking way

You felt a heavy weight on your shoulder grabbing you and holding you down, when something covered your mouth. It was him you knew it, you opened your eyes but you immediately felt sleepy, something just hit me? tightness and pain in your hands and ankles woke you up, the setting sun was shining on your face, your whole body ached and the dripping blood and hard ground weren’t helping neither. You fully opened your eyes, your heart was beating like never before, you could feel this is your end. “Im glad you woke up♡” - his hand was touching your cheek softly, he was smiling like a kid who just got a candy. Its so cold, wait I don’t have my clothes on? And im tied up to a.. tree?? “Youre a psycho, let me go please..” you almost whispered “Please i dont want to die here” You started crying, youve never been so scared, please let it be over

“Please dont cry, please” - He said it so softly, almost like hes not the reason youre here, sobbing as your blood drips down from your cut he made. He took your face in his hands, lifted your jaw and pressed his lips against yours, you bite him, you wanted to hurt him, just to leave you alone. He looked at you with sad eyes, you cut his lower lip. He took her blood from it on his finger and.. put it into your mouth “suck, little one come onnn, you made this.” He smiled, it was so fucking scary how can be smiling? Youre sucking on his finger tasting his blood, hes looking directly into your eyes. He took the finger out and stayed silent for a while, Slap! He hit you Slap! again and again again again. So hard, so many times that your cheeks look like a big red-purple mess. You cant stop crying, and he cant stop smiling. Can he stop fucking smiling? Clearly he got bored of just hitting your cheeks, so he unzipped his pants revealing his hard cock, did he came a couple of times? You clearly can see the sperm on his pants. Disgusting, disgusting, I want it to stop.

he spread your legs and spat on your mud-dirty cunt, yeah right your whole body was dirty because you’re laying on the ground in the middle of the forest tidied up to a big tree looking like some actres from fucked up bdsm porn Slap! He went inside, which made you moan, it really hurts, can he stop please? he grabbed your hair, forcing you to look at him, “my name is Armin Slap I moved in next to you, you know Slap I noticed something… you wear very slutty panties” He said and took out one of your missing ones from his pocket he put it to his nose and sniffed still moving his hips. he smiled and put them in your mouth so deep that made you gagged on your own cumdirty panties

[tigeri102]

Hi there! I found your blog from reddit while looking for posts about how to grow a tumblr community as an artist (I used to be a regular here like 10 years ago, but I don't even use the email I had back then so I'm back fully from scratch). Any tips that you'd give to a newbie? ^^

oh ! henlo welcome to hell \o/ ill be real tho i truly have little to nothing you dont already seem to have figured out lmao. i dont know anything about community-building and i never have im just here to vibe 🙏

your theme, art, use of tags etc are all lovely fwiw !! but im no expert on getting any real mileage out of this site i just post bullshit all day baybee

edit oops i actually came up with a handful of tips while rambling in the tags and im too lazy to move em to the body text lmao but godspeed

[mishy-mashy]

Just a little fun detail..

THAT KUDO IS SO SHORT HE TUCKS HIS PANTS IN HIGH BOOTS.

Bruce wears those pants just fine, so he wears normal shoes. But Kudo? Look at how big they are on him. He wears boots almost up to his KNEES just to wear those pants. They're so baggy on him that the middle part for where the crotch goes, it's also almost down to his knees

Guy, where'd you get the pants? Are you just that short? Or did you take them from the long-legged Bruce?

[squuote]

I wish I knew more about music or like how to talk about it in depth because the tsp soundtrack literally makes me feel so many emotions and I don’t even have the words to express why it makes my heart claw out of my chest (major rambling in the tags lol)

[lupismaris]

There is nothing so affirming and life saving as leaving home and being loved at face value by total strangers for who you are

[br1ghtestlight]

writing a general outline of all my characters and their personality/character journeys lately and im beginning to realize that the phrase "disregards rules" comes up more often than i anticipated LMAO