#and like … when someone requests another writer to do my plot … I can’t say anything because I don’t know that writer well or that writer
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tenderlyrenjun · 2 years ago
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ex tumblr anon again, i still write, i just moved to ao3 ^^
and yeah i totally get it! similar stuff used to go around in one of the writing spaces for a group i wrote for so it's just really easy to pick up the signs for me i guess. like ah yeah, i remember seeing this. normal people who read and don't like a fic will simply close the tab and find something else so anyone vehemently coming at you like this quite obviously has different intentions and isn't just mad because you're a "bad writer," in fact, they're probably mad for the very opposite.
i still follow you from my new personal account looking forward to your next work! i hope you can find some peace, but i know it's difficult. seen a lot of talented people pushed off this site, and unfortunately one loser being loud will always feel worse than twenty people telling us we're worth it.
<3
I keep reading, like, from actual writers talk about how “normal people” will close out of a fic or how “normal people” don’t, like, send criticism, but really, it’s, like, a Venn diagram of normal people and writers but the diagram is a circle — aka the normal people = writers, and this isn’t to say anything against people who do just that (I’m pretty sure these are mostly silent readers), but idk, I just don’t have any writer mutuals to rely on … ha … that’s my fault. I’m not really likeable (evidence: this blog).
like, I am chronically On Twitter also, and I read off of ff.net/ao3 occasionally (I don’t have an account though because writers on those platforms use Twitter or tumblr anyways for communication), and it’s usually just writers interacting with writers/artists interacting with artists, publicly; it’s v rarely, like, an anonymous reader — which fair, valid; no one owes me feedback, but this makes it infinitely more difficult, on my part, to do anything against that one “loser” because I just … I don’t have any writer friends and the writing community feels so unwelcoming no matter what I do, and again, I know this is my fault — like, maybe if I am a better writer, I won’t get so many criticizing anons.
I don’t think anon is mad at me for the opposite of me being a bad writer; I think it’s that I’m not executing my fics very well (I have an ask, like, two directly under this that kind of(?) address this too) — and, like, again, fair, valid. it’s responsible to be upset that something didn’t go the way you expected it. like, I saw someone request the exact plot of one of my fics on another blog, and just, like, I was kinda heartbroken about it lol (sorry, I know that’s dramatic; I was just sad because it’s literally something that I worked so hard on, and in the end nothing matters because someone always does a drabble better than I do a fic). Idk, it just feels so … intentional; not, like, targeted, but just that nothing matters and my fics do suck because it just keeps going to show that someone else is literally doing everything better and people don’t want fics from me. idk, I’m probably just being overdramatic about it. It’s literally just fanfic; it’s not that big of a deal. sorry, you’re being nice and I’m being negative. I do appreciate the ask; it’s just hard to be here without taking everything to heart; like, I know that no one is intentionally rude or malicious; I’m just ……. overdramatic.
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xxxsoukokuxxx · 3 years ago
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BSD Poe x short(4”11) female reader
Soulmate au
Fluff oneshot
Reader has the ability to turn into a black cat.
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Black Cat in the Rue Morgue
Soulmate AU
Character: Poe x short fem!reader
Warnings: None
Notes: Thanks for requesting and for your patience. I haven't written a soulmate AU before so I actually did some research on it and hopefully it pays off. I hope that this is what you wanted and have a pleasant day/night!
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The sun was now setting and dipped itself into Yokohama's waters letting it's light drip onto the water's surface. Book in hand, raccoon on his shoulders with a pen in the other hand Poe is lost in his thoughts. The outside world doesn't exist. There is nothing but the various ideas for his novel running through his head and softness of fur against the back of his neck and head.
He jots down a few things that he could elaborate on later. The room is dyed in the color of honey and wine as the fading warmth of the sunset creates a sense of comfort. The side of his face illuminated by the gentle golden color.
Karl suddenly jumps off his shoulders and Poe's startled. His eyes wide, 'How long has it been?' he takes in his surroundings and realizes it's already sunset and soon night will fall upon Yokohama.
Poe gets up, closes his book and stretches with a sickening cracking sound erupting from his back, indeed how long has it been? He looks down to where Karl is sitting on the floor and he reaches to ruffle the fur on his head before leaving the room.
He makes a cup of tea for himself once he's in the kitchen and stares out the window. The sleeve of his shirt slides up a bit as Poe tilts his cup to take a sip, a small scarlet mark of a feline like figure on the underside of his wrist becomes visible. It's always been there but he brushed it off, that was until he came across various articles, theories and fiction books about "soulmates". And he can't help but wonder 'Is there really someone out there who'd love me? Do I have a soulmate? Or is it just a meaningless mark?'
Sometimes he'd think it's preposterous while other times he'd genuinely love that idea. But he always blushes straight after, to imagine spending such intimate moments with someone, to hold their hand, to hold them, to share a meaningful smile...it's really a beautiful thought.
Poe sets his cup down on the counter before adjusting his coat and making his way to the front door of the spacious house and opens it. He peeks through the gap between the door frame and from where he's opened making sure there are no people out at the moment and he sighs a breath of relief. Stepping out into the quiet evening he takes a walk along a specific quiet and peaceful street he likes. Evening and night are the only times he'll ever make it outside the comfort of his home without having an anxiety attack.
As he walks down the pavement a rustling noise can be heard in an alleyway which he is just about to pass. He freezes and the hair on the back of his neck stands up. From the corner of his eye he sees a dark shadow on the floor approaching which makes him panic, "P-Please don't attack me or anything, I really don't have any valuables that you'd wa-" he cut off his sentence as he felt something rub against the bottom of his leg.
Immediately he drops to his knees and buries his face in his hands, "Okay, okay I'll surrender!" he yelps. "..." Nothing. He dares to turn his head towards his left and relief washes over him, a panic stricken face now softens, "Oh, silly me. Always panicking for no good reason." He now looks at a black cat which has it's head tilted to the side out of confusion.
It was the norm for you to roam around the city at night either because you couldn't sleep or you just liked the atmosphere. If someone happened to be walking by and you felt a curious sense of playfulness then you'd just go up and show them some cat-like affection. However, out of all the times you had done so this had never happened. "How cute." he muttered, snapping you out of your thoughts. He reached out to pet the spot atop your head.
'No wonder why cats like this.' was your thought. "I don't see any collar or anything signifying you belong to someone." he said aloud placing his forefinger on his chin. "I can't just leave you here alone, hmm and Karl would have a playmate if I took you back with me...oh but do raccoons and cats get along? They could possibly..." as he rambled on you wondered if this was a good time as any to scram or reveal that you're actually a human who has the ability to turn into a cat, specifically a black one.
You slowly backed away and he noticed. "Oh no don't be scared!" he reaches his hands out to you. Ah, he seemed like such a nice person, a gentle person. You couldn't just leave like that, now could you? A ribbon of grey spun around you with various kanji on it. A bright light flashed and Poe freezes with his hands which wanted to reach out to you. His eyes widen once he sees the sight in front of him and questions everything he knows. His mouth agape.
"Hi." you said shyly whilst dusting your attire. "...you..." he still kneeled on the ground, frozen. You felt nervous but thought that after what he just witnessed it'd be necessary to tell him about yourself. "Uhm, okay I know you think this is weird but there's this thing called abilities and my ability is to turn into a black cat..." you sped through your words while fiddling with your thumbs.
Now he understands. Of course he knows what abilities are. "Oh. Ah, don't worry I know what abilities are. I have one myself." he says standing up, now realizing just how short you are. You look up, "Wait, you do as well?" a certain spark of curiosity in your eyes, I guess having a cat ability allows you to have the same characteristics of a cat. His cheeks have a faint red color on them, you look cute when you're curious.
"Y-Yes, it's called Black Cat in the Rue Morgue." "What a coincidence." you giggle. He rubs the back of his neck and sighs contently, "Yes it is. It allows me to transport my readers into my books." "Oh, you're a writer!?" another spark of curiosity in your eyes. He internally smiled at your apparent excitement, "Yes I am. Ah! Excuse my rudeness, my name is Edgar Allan Poe but you can just call me Poe if you'd like."
A smile adorned your face and you introduced yourself too. "I'm sorry about startling you earlier, I promise you I'm no cat burglar." He blinks and after a moment you both laugh at the little pun made and the situation itself. "I don't think such an innocent looking being could ever do such a thing." he blushes as he says those words and you do too.
He takes a look at his surroundings and back at you. "W-Would you...like to uh join me for a stroll? I was planning on going t-to this cafe that's opened til late?" You look up and smile while silently thinking his stuttering is rather cute. "Sure." The walk there was peaceful and enjoyable, every three seconds he would glance at you and a lingering question would be on his mind but he brushes it off. He tries to get to know you despite his nervousness and he succeeds. Even if it's just the little things such as your favorite color, where you live, if you have any pets.
You both finally reached the cafe and took a seat, he was gentleman about pulling your seat out for you and such. The only part he dreaded was ordering, that anxiousness that would bubble up in his chest made his mouth go dry and he's at a loss for words. The barista comes about and asks if you'd both like to order anything, a simple coffee/latte was fine for you. Poe looked pale and tugged on the front of his shirt. You worried if he was okay but he eventually ordered something to drink off the menu and a sigh of relief escaped him once he was done talking.
"You okay?" His eyes widens as he finally looks up at you again, "Yes. Yeah I'm fine, no need to worry. I just..." he looks down again while rubbing the back of his neck, his hair falling over his eyes. "I'm just really shy if you could say that. Or perhaps i just have social anxiety." he let out a nervous chuckle while lifting his head to smile at you. A giggle escapes you, "I think it's cute." He's taken aback but only because he's not used to being complimented and his face turns red.
The orders are served and the barista bows and leaves again. A light-hearted conversation flitters between you two and Karl comes up somewhere in the conversation, Poe saying that he'd love to let you see him. You tilt your cup to take a sip of your drink and the sleeve of your shirt rides up a bit, revealing a portion of your wrist. Poe is taking a sip too and his eyes flutter over your figure.
His eyes widen once he catches sight of the scarlet mark on your wrist and he chokes. "A-Are you okay?" you put your cup down and panic slightly. "Y-Yes I'm fine." he replies adjusting himself.
"Can I ask you something?" curiosity now lacing his voice. "Sure, go ahead."
"Have you always had that red feline-like mark on your wrist?" You look at the mark and reply that it's always been there, indeed. "I think it's because of my ability but I'm not really sure. Perhaps it's a birthmark." He smiles. "Perhaps it is." Is this what he thinks it is? No...he couldn't possibly just jump to conclusions, but certainly what a coincidence it was. The exact same mark on both your wrists and a meeting like this? A beautiful coincidence it was.
"Why do you ask?" you tilt your head to the side much as you did when you were a cat. And if he didn't think you were any cuter now he'd be damned. "Oh no, just asking." he gives a closed eyes smile.
'Soulmates. How fascinating.' he thinks while smiling at you as you take another sip of your coffee/latte. His eyes wander again to the scarlet mark on your wrist.
And the plot thickens.
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coalitiongirl · 3 years ago
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Fic Recs (under 300 edition)
So I wanted to get back to reading Swan Queen fic regularly, and I asked people to rec longfic that they'd read (not written) and loved that had fewer than 300 kudos! I haven’t read most of these, but I’ve collected them here so y’all can go through the list and discover some new fics with me! Please try to kudos and review every fic that you read! It means the world to the writers and will keep em writing, and then we all win. 😁
Atonement by SgtMac (M): With Regina's magical heart failing thanks to years of previous evil, Emma and Regina and Henry (and Granny!) set out to save her life by traveling to the Enchanted Forest and requesting help from ancient magical beings known as the Guardians. Given a mission as simple as it is impossible - to achieve atonement by creating peace - the ladies find themselves joining a rebellion and fighting for the very soul of the Enchanted Forest all while trying to help Regina to understand that the self-loathing and guilt which have driven most of her actions don't have to doom her chance for a new beginning or even, a chance to live and love again. A S4(ish) SQ love story set against the turmoil of war and the chaotic savagery of the old world.
Blood and Sand by cheshire6845 (E): A/U The Savior is a slave forced into the role of fighting as a gladiator for the House of Hearts. The odds are against her survival as she will have to win in the arena, navigate Cora's schemes, outlast a general's vengeance, and not be killed out of spite by the current House of Hearts Champion - Regina the Undefeated. This story follows the major plot points of Starz Spartacus with some twists along the way.
But what if there was no time by KizuRai (M): When she wakes up, it's dark. She can't move, she can't see, she can't feel and she can't hear. Where am I? She feels a forceful oppression, pressing her down, draining her of her energy and she's powerless to stop it. How did I get here? The question of here is relative, she's not even sure where here is. What happened? There must be some reason for being stuck here but her memory is fuzzy, like all her thoughts are being sifted through a filter. Who am I? She's not sure if she actually exists or she suddenly became sentient in the darkness.She hears a voice reverberating in the distance, it's distorted and quiet but she hears it all the same. It breaks the monotony of the silence. Someone's coming for her, they will get her out. She's just not sure she wants them to as the price might be too great.
Finding Home by evl_rgl (T): “I wanted to remember you so badly that I pulled back your cursed town just so that the memories would make sense. I needed you so badly that even when I had no memory of you, I still tried to find you.” Regina gave Emma and Henry memories of a happy life together before they fled Pan’s curse, leaving them with no memories of their lives in Storybrooke. However, when the memory spell shows signs of failing, threatening to rip apart the minds of both Emma and Henry, Regina makes a drastic choice to go back and fix it, understanding that it will mean living alone in a world where her son doesn’t know her. Was the spell really faulty, though? (swanqueen)
Five Flames by MariaComet (U): In the past, Emma Nolan disconnected from her peers in high school, preferring to keep to herself. In her sophomore year of high school, she decided to try and join the boy’s wrestling team because she was bored. She didn’t expect herself to become the champion of the most bullied kid in school or the secret best friend of the school queen. She also didn’t expect to join a club that would change her life. In the present, Emma is trying to cope with a humiliating loss in her martial arts career. She claims to be “training” but is stuck in limbo between wanting to retire and try again. She is isolated from her former best friend, Regina Mills, a local celebrity chef and the rest of her old friends. When one of them calls her with an idea to honor their deceased teacher, she is confronted with unresolved feelings and questions about how powerful love truly is.
A Glamour of Truth by PrincessCharming (T): After 2x10, Regina uses magic to show Emma the obvious truth. A tentative trust forms between them amid hilarious bickering. With Emma's help, Regina struggles to regain a place in her son's life... until Cora arrives, wanting her daughter back. Pieces of Regina's past emerge showing that the board was set long before the game started. The final battle begins soon.
His Dark Materials 'verse by MoonlitMidnight (M): A modern Alternate Universe in which Dæmons (the external physical manifestation of a person's 'inner self' that takes the form of an animal) are present. In which Emma and Regina have led slightly different lives and they make slightly different choices.
How Many Miles to Avalon? (WIP) by RavenOutlander (E): Regina would do anything to save Emma from the darkness and bring her back home safe and sound. Even put up with the two idiots, Captain Guyliner and a bunch of dwarves she decidedly wanted to drop off at the nearest exit. But in their search for Emma, they find that she might not need that much saving after all. Caught up in a search for the infamous Philosopher Stone, an all out war between DunBroch and Camelot, and ghosts from the past to haunt her every waking moment, Regina finds herself scrambling to keep her and her family's happy endings from falling apart.
The Hyperion by FrankenSpine (M): After wishing upon what she believes is a shooting star, Emma Swan finds herself aboard the Hyperion, the royal starship of an alien Queen from a faraway galaxy. She quickly learns of the tensions between the Queen's people and her own, but the Queen takes an interest in her and agrees to take her away from Earth forever. Adventure awaits. *(Loosely based on Guardians of the Galaxy with just a hint of Farscape)*
If Wishes Came True (It Would've Been You) by Angeii_K (M): After Regina films a guest appearance on her friend Neal’s popular show, he invites her to spend the weekend with him and his girlfriend. What she never expected was to actually like the woman. Sparks fly between the two, which results in them questioning everything and making choices they will later regret. 4 years later, they meet again in the most unexpected of ways. Now co-stars on the same show, they are forced to work through the emotions from their last encounter. What will happen next? Only time will tell.
The King Doesn’t Have To Know (WIP) by highheelsandchocolate (M): The White Knight had never seen anyone like her before: the Queen was nothing short of mesmerizing. Her possessive yet neglectful husband, however, was another thing entirely.
The Lich by Dangereaux (M): Gay disaster Emma, exasperated Regina, and a monster. A Halloween special.
Maybe if We Close Our Eyes we Can Reach the Stars by wellthizizdeprezzing (T): Emma is a lonely astronaut. Regina is an adventuring alien. Their paths cross leading them onto a journey of new discovery. Between galaxies and many miles of cold black space, despite not speaking the same language, they manage to fall for each other. An out of this world love story.
A prisoner long forgotten by sugarsweet_19 (M): ‘I wish I had a child as white as snow, as red as blood and as black as the wood of the window-frame. Soon after she had a little girl, who was as white as snow, with lips as red as blood and with her hair as black as the ebony of the window-frame. She was therefore called Snow-white.” This is how our story starts but how will it end?The evil queen as been locked up in a tower and forgotten that is until princess Emma looks for a place to hid from her parents after they tell her she has to marry Neal the son of the dark one.
Revenge of the Three Little Pigs by mskyo (M): Regina and Emma find themselves alone and looking for the rest of their party. The Evil Queen must face the consequences of her past actions. Will Emma come to her aid, or understand that justice must be served... *Some chapters have fairly graphic sex, and violence*
Things I Almost Remember by cheshire6845 (T): A/U Despite an oncoming war between the Dark and the Light, Emma and Regina are best friends growing up in the Enchanted Forest. When war does come, they find themselves on opposite sides. Regina will have to defy her mother to save Emma. Will Emma be able to save Regina when Cora curses her daughter to live in the Land without Magic?
What We Make (WIP) by DiazTuna (M): “My mother.” He says calmly. He’d known all along, she’s aware. But he’d known that today would be the day that would get this going. She wants to ask what it was like, to have woken up this morning, laced up his boots and walked into hell just knowing. “It’s programmed the cyborg to kill her. Before I have a chance to be born.” -In which the leader of the future sends his best soldier back to the past to save his mother from a killer cyborg. Terminator AU.
The Wrong Way by pcworth (M): Takes place right after Zelena steals Regina's heart. Zelena offers Regina a chance to go back in time with her and change both of their lives for the better. But what will be the price of that decision. Slow-burn to SwanQueen
zombie trash by 13pens (T): Zelena could have her brain and eat it, too. Fic operates on three premises 1. this takes place in any universe where zelena is a reformed asshole 2. zombies are a thing and exist iZombie style 3. i have NO chill
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hangovercurse · 4 years ago
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I’d Drop it All for You
Pictures of you and Pete are spread all over the internet, causing a whirlwind of hate to enter your social media.
Request: “Pete content please! anything !!! smut fluff whatever”
Pete x Reader
Warnings: Cursing, depictions of depression and anxiety
A/N: *Insert normal spiel about respecting A.G. and only using her for plot purposes. No harm intended.* Also I wrote most of this after a meeting with my therapist so... enjoy :) (He’s so cute in this gif I wanna kiss his face)
Word Count: 1820
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You weren’t one of those people who loved being the center of attention. You knew that being in the spotlight also meant constantly living under a microscope, and you decided a long time ago that that was not for you.
But you were lucky enough to work as an assistant art director at just 24. You were hoping that The King of Staten Island, your newest project, would help get your name out into the professional world. But that wasn’t the only thing to come out of the film.
It happened unexpectedly, you showed up on set the first day, ready to do whatever the art director required of you. You couldn’t help but be slightly distracted by the lead actor and writer, Pete Davidson. He was so kind and funny, and he wasn’t uptight like everyone else.
After a few hours of filming, he came up to you, introducing himself. He said he “wanted to get to know everyone working on the project,” but you didn’t see him introducing himself to anyone else. You two started talking during breaks. Then he started sitting with you at lunch. Then he was asking for your number.
In a matter of weeks he was asking you out to dinner, taking you to a cozy restaurant that you absolutely adored. He walked you home, his hand grazing yours until you intertwined your fingers.
It was all very romantic, so when Pete asked if he could take you on another, you obviously said yes. Flash forward two weeks and he finally got the courage to ask you to be his girlfriend, even though you were both exclusively seeing each other already.
After filming ended 2 months later, you were still working on the film in post, which meant you had an excuse to stay  in Staten Island with Pete. After about 2 weeks in post, you spent more nights in his bed than your hotel’s.
Nearly 6 months later and you were happier than ever. You were splitting your time between your small apartment in the Bronx and Pete’s basement apartment. Pete introduced you to most of his friends, and you introduced him to yours.
But other than your small circles of friends, you kept your relationship fairly quiet. Pete doesn’t have social media and yours is strictly professional, so there are no pictures of you two together. You weren’t hiding each other, you loved each other, you just had no reason to tell tabloids. And you were perfectly happy with that.
Which made it so much worse when various news sites had pictures of you two holding hands. Had they been anyone else you would’ve thought they were cute, walking along the South Beach oceanside at night.
Pete had been in the SNL studio all day when the pictures were released, while you were in his apartment, trying your best to focus on the photoset in front of you. The production team wanted the film to scream “teen romance,” which basically entails subtle pink undertones and a higher saturation. But you couldn’t quite get the coloring right, probably because you weren’t actually focusing on the colors.
You sighed, looking at the time and realizing that Pete won’t be back until sometime after 2am, which was a whole 5 hours away. You let out a huff, pushing away from the desk and making your way to Pete’s closet and searching for one of his hoodies. They always smelled like him (and weed), so it was a comfort to you.
You crashed onto the bed, finding the phone that you had tossed there a few hours earlier. Turning it on you were surprised by the number of notifications you were getting. You knew the photos had surfaced but you weren’t expecting this.
Your Instagram was blowing up with new follows, likes, and comments. It was kind of exciting at first until you started reading some of the comments.
I mean, we knew he would downgrade from Ari, but this is like… really far down.
This girl really thinks she’s special just bc Pete’s dating her. Hun he could do so much better
Who is she?!? Literally no one.
Someone needs to show her how to dress
That hairstyle is not it honey
Pete Davidson is dating YOU??? He could do sooo much better
Ari was prettier sorry not sorry
The entire comment section on your last post, a picture of you on the set of your latest film, was pretty much the same. There were some nice comments, but a lot of mean ones.
And you couldn’t help it, you couldn’t stop looking at them. It felt so cliché, but it was like all of your deepest insecurities about being with Pete were thrown out on the table.
You knew that Pete had a fairly large following, and that a lot of people had really strong feelings about him. You had expected that if and when your relationship went public you would have a lot of people watching you, scrutinizing you. But you didn’t care because Pete was worth it.
Now you weren’t so sure. It wasn’t that you couldn’t handle people talking bad about you, because you definitely could, even if it hurt. You just weren’t expecting the amount of people comparing you to Ariana or saying that Pete could do so much better.
And it only bothered you so much because you felt it too. Your inner demons loved to remind you that Pete had dated Ariana fucking Grande and now he’s dating you. Anyone could see an obvious downgrade.
You turned your phone off and threw it on the opposite side of the bed, trying to think positive thoughts. “I am in control of my own thoughts and emotions. I am catching my negative thoughts and fixing them.” You murmured your therapist’s mantra to yourself, but it was too late. The thoughts had already taken hold of your mind.
Your eyes started to water as you could feel the heavy feeling in your chest set in. You pulled the hood over your head, pulling the straps to hide as much of your face as possible, and pulling your knees to your chest. You laid like that for a while, tears falling as doubts ran through your head. Once you had effectively exhausted your thoughts, you went numb. Your tears had stopped, but you couldn’t move. This wasn’t an unfamiliar feeling, but it sure wasn’t pleasurable.
There was a sort of buzzing throughout your body, almost like the feeling when your foot falls asleep, but everywhere. It seemed to block out your sound, as you didn’t hear the basement door open. You only knew that Pete was home when he sat beside you on the bed, pulling the hood off your face.
“There’s my beautiful girl.” He smiled at you. You tried your best to fake one back, but you honestly couldn’t find the energy. Pete pulled you so you were sitting up, back pressed against his front. His arms wrapped around your middle as he pressed a kiss to your temple. “What’s goin on?” He murmured against your skin.
“Did you see them?” You asked, your voice quiet and hoarse.
Pete let out a sigh, “Yeah, I saw them.” He paused, his hold on you getting tighter, like he was making sure you couldn’t leave. “I’m sorry baby. I know you didn’t want it to be a whole big thing.”
You turned your head to face him, “It’s not that. I really don’t mind that people know. We weren’t trying to hide anything.”
He smiled, “Yeah, I know I just- it was nice having this to ourselves.”
He wanted to hide you. He’s embarrassed of you.
Your inner dialogue never seemed to shut up.
You turned away from Pete, trying to hide the tears forming in your eyes. “Yeah.” You whispered.
“What’s wrong, you’re still upset.” He rocked you in his arms, kissing the top of your head. You shrugged in response, not trusting yourself to talk. “You can talk to me, y’know.”
You nodded, leaning further into Pete’s chest. “People found my Instagram.” You murmured, looking down and tracing the arrow tattoo on his hand.
“Whaddya mean? I thought it was public?” He furrowed his eyebrows.
You sighed, wishing you hadn’t said anything. “Yeah, it is. But after all the articles people started following me and shit.”
“I would ask how that’s a problem but I deleted my Instagram so I can’t really talk.” You could tell he was trying to make you feel better, but you couldn’t seem to get out of your haze.
You shook your head, deciding to drop the matter. “It’s not, I’m just being overdramatic.” You sighed, putting on a fake smile and facing him fully. “Wanna watch a movie?” You asked, trying to change the topic.
He gave you the I-know-you’re-bullshitting-me look, which made you look down. “Something’s bothering you, Y/N. And you’re trying to pretend it doesn’t because you think your feelings aren’t valid, but they are.” He tilted his head, trying to meet your eyes that were still trained on the bedsheets below you.
“Where’d you learn that one?” You chuckled half-heartedly.
“Rehab part 2” he smiled, hand coming to your jaw to tilt your head up. “C’mon, talk to me. I wanna help.”
You huffed, moving towards the opposite side of the bed where your phone laid. You opened it, finding your Instagram, and showing him the comments. His eyebrows furrowed as he scrolled through the comments. When he decided he’d had enough he put your phone down, grabbing your waist and lifting you onto his lap so you were essentially straddling him.
He leaned his forehead against your own, your noses touching. “That’s all bullshit, you know that, right?”
You looked down, biting your lip. “Y/N you’re the most amazing, most beautiful woman I’ve ever met, okay? I’m in love with you, not anyone else.” Pete’s eyes were searching yours, trying to figure out what was going on in your head.
“I know.” You sighed, “It’s just hard to be with you and not compare myself to her. And then all these people started to do it too, and they kept saying that you could do so much better and you can. So, I dunno I guess I just kind of spiraled.”
Pete captured your lips in a long, passionate kiss. “Y/N. There is literally no better than you. I can’t do better because you are the best woman I have ever loved. “
You pulled Pete in for another kiss. “Thank you, Pete. I love you.”
“I love you too. If this happens again, I want you to call me. I don’t care what I’m doing, I’d drop it all for you.” You smiled, sitting in the arms of the guy you loved. The thoughts didn’t just magically go away, but for a brief moment in time, you were happy.
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jimlingss · 4 years ago
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I really enjoyed reading your fic fall in hatred with jin and liked the concept of a couple on the verge of a divorce. I thought I’d make a request for an angsty marriage/divorce au with another member like jk but it ends fluffy🥺
Whether you take this request or not, I wanted to say that you’re a great writer and I always love reading your stories 💜
↳ Honeymoon Horrors
3.7k || 55% Angst, 45% Fluff || Min Yoongi || Divorce!AU
It was great when it started.   Cloud nine had descended down and made its home above both your heads. You were practically floating, swooning, living a romance that Nicholas Sparks would’ve envied. You felt like you were on a permanent high as if weed and cocaine was permanently stuck in your system. You had reached enlightenment and you were permanently euphoric. How could you not be?   You had met your soulmate after all.   But as the years passed, it came tumbling down. Cloud nine started to rain. You swooned so hard that you struck your head against the edge of the kitchen counter. Instead of floating, you were getting dragged down to hell and the high you felt turned into a crash. Most importantly, you became enraged.   And you’re still mad now.   When you watch your wedding videos, all you can do is throw popcorn at the screen and scream at the grinning bitch that she’s making the worst mistake of her life.    Life’s full of plot twists, isn’t it?   And you can only chuckle at that realization now. Because what was meant to be the honeymoon you never had, a replacement honeymoon of sorts, is turning out to be a nightmare.   “Hey. Can you move?”   You rip off your headphones. “Excuse me?”   “You’re taking up all of the space.” Yoongi stares at you lazily. “This is supposed to be my armrest.”   “No. This is mine. That’s yours.”   “No. Yours is next to the window. This one is supposed to be mine. If you’re that uncomfortable, you should’ve just given me the window seat.”   You scoff and shove his arm off the armrest with your own. The half-offended, half-amused expression on Yoongi’s face is utterly stupid. It’s as if he’s judging you for being childish when he was the one who started this. You wish you could punch him square in the nose. “If you want me to move, then why don’t you move your legs? You’re taking up all the leg room!”   “You’re only out of space because you had to put your purse under the seat.”   “Where else am I supposed to put my purse?!”   “Do you see me carrying a purse?”   Suddenly, there’s a clearing of the throat. A female flight attendant is standing at the aisle and leaning over while wearing a perfectly, cordial smile. “Is there a problem over here?”   Your eyes narrow into the nosy bitch sitting across the aisle who probably tattled. You saw her looking in the corner of her eye from the very start.    “No. Not at all.”   Yoongi smiles easily. “We’re fine.”   There’s an urge to roll your eyes.    In all honesty, you underestimated Yoongi. While your divorce was well on its way and heading off like a bullet train, you had forgotten how petty he was. Exactly like you. Maybe that’s why for a period of time, you suited one another so well.   With the deposit already given on what was supposed to be the honeymoon extravaganza you never had and the plans already made long ago, you were set on going no matter what. Except he was also set on going. The asshole couldn’t give up and neither were you willing to give in.   So here you were. With your worst nemesis.    “Can you repeat that?”   “I’m sorry, ma’am. There’s no possible way we can get you two rooms.” The receptionist looks up from her computer screen. “You originally booked the presidential suite, correct?”   “Yes, but we changed it into two regular rooms a while ago,” Yoongi says. His brows are cinched together and he’s gripping onto the itinerary tightly.   The girl behind the front desk looks at her computer again and clicks twice but probably at nothing. “I’m so sorry. It looks like it didn’t register into our system. Is there anything else I can do for you?”   This is dreadful. As if things couldn’t get worse, they got much much worse.   “Great.” You haul in your luggage, no thanks to him. “This is just great.”   “Yeah, keep complaining,” Yoongi grumbles, “See how much that helps.”   “Shut up.”   On the top floor, the room is quiet and open. There’s a love seat in front of a flat screen television, a dining room and an open kitchen and bar. The large glass windows fully face the sandy, blue beach and allows light to pour into the enormous space. There are two chairs outside the private terrace and a jacuzzi too. But as beautiful as the place is, you feel bitter.    It should’ve been great.    It would’ve been great if you were alone.   And to make matters worse, it seems like the resort hadn’t gotten the news that your relationship with Yoongi was essentially decimated. Not when there was a scattered rose petal path leading up to the king-sized bed which also had two folded doves on it with the word ‘congratulations’ spelled out in more petals. There’s also a note: I hope you enjoy yourselves, Mr. and Mrs. Min. And neither of you miss the mountainous stack of condoms on the nightstand.   Yoongi’s pale. “Christ.”   The knock on the door breaks the thick tension.   Yoongi opens the door, and he immediately steps back as two enthusiastic employees enter while wheeling in a silver cart. “Aloha, welcome to Hawaii! Are you the newlyweds?”   “Umm…”    The two of you are well past that period. To be exact, you married nearly two years ago, but you don’t know how to break it to them. Yoongi’s never been good with words either.   “Enjoying your honeymoon, aren’t you? Congratulations!” The older man is excited as if he was the one who got married. “We bought you a bottle of our best champagne to celebrate and hope you have an everlasting marriage!”   The girl beside the man pops the cork and pours the champagne, and you realize it would be more painless to go along with it.   “Thanks,” you mumble, taking your flute of champagne and nearly downing the entire thing in one go. Yoongi holds his and raises a brow at you.   “We also have a red velvet cake.” He shows you on the busy cart. “And our freshest chocolate strawberries just made earlier by our finest chef. I think you’ll enjoy this chocolate as well.”   “Thank you.” Yoongi offers a faint smile. “This is really nice.”   “Of course, of course! Anything for our newlyweds!” There’s a small bowl of almonds next to the chocolates and two raw oysters served on a plate. It’s odd with the ensemble, but then the man leans closer as if revealing a secret and puts a hand by his mouth. “It is said almonds, chocolate and oysters are aphrodisiacs.”   You choke on your champagne, sputtering.   The girl grins. Yoongi’s wide-eyed.   He collects himself quicker than you do. “Thank you.”   Luckily the friendly, borderline-overbearing staff leave the both of you to it and you’re put out of your misery. For only a moment.   “Are you going to finish that bottle of champagne by yourself?” Yoongi asks across the room and you turn your head to see his cocked brow. Of course, he’s unpacking. The asshole doesn’t know how to relax and always has to make you look bad.   You scoff. “I’m about to open the red wine too.”   “Never thought I’d see you be reduced to a drunk so quickly.”   “Why can’t you just leave me alone? You’re always judging and nitpicking me.”   “I was making a comment.”   “Yeah and no one asked you to,” you mumble into the glass.   Yoongi eyes you. “You don’t have to get so upset, Y/N.”   “Are you serious?” Your posture straightens, legs lifted off the chair you propped them on and feet shifted onto the ground. “I was sitting here minding my own business. Why don’t you mind your own business.”   “I just thought you didn’t want to be sloppy when dinner hasn’t even started yet.”   “I know how to control my pacing.”   Yoongi snorts.   Your tongue rolls inside your cheek. “Excuse me?”   “What?”   “You look like you want to say something.”   “No. Not at all.”   You place the flute down onto the table. “Say it, Yoongi.”    “I thought you said I should mind my own business.”   “You’re such a condescending asshole, you know that?”   Yoongi stops folding his shirt and shuts the drawer. His expression is impassive and it irritates you more. “Pot meets kettle.”   “For someone who’s supposedly quiet, you fucking never know how to shut up.”   “Can’t you just calm down, Y/N? Unlike what you think, I’m not trying to get on your nerves. I’m trying to enjoy this trip.”   “Why are you acting like I’m the only one getting upset and that I’m the crazy one,” you spit, and he opens his mouth as if to say you are being crazy. But you don’t let him— “Don’t you dare say it. Fuck you, Yoongi. You don’t think I’m trying to enjoy this too? You think I wanted it to be like this?!”   “Maybe if you weren’t trying to pick a fight with me every goddamn second, you would have a good time, woman.”   “You’re the one who’s always trying to pick a fight with me!”   He sighs, body language dismissive to what you’re saying. “Stop being so upset—”   “Well too bad, I am upset! So just let me be!” You stand on your feet, teeth gritted and fist clenched. You’re practically screaming across the suite but there aren’t any close enough neighbours to complain. “You’re always telling me what I should and shouldn’t feel! This is exactly why we’re getting a divorce!”   With the last word said, you stomp away and the bathroom door slams shut. It’s the only place you can be alone, but even then, the four walls are frosted glass.   …   You’re not sure who brought up divorce first. It’s not like it matters. But one thing you do know is that it came up in an argument. A jab where someone’s sole intention was to hurt. And the other person stubbornly retaliated with ‘fine, have it your way’.   You remember calling your lawyer and him calling his. The process continued and continued and as it did, so did your arguments as the two of you realized no one was going to stop it. It became more painful the more time that went on. Clearly, it meant he was serious about it. Clearly, he didn’t care if he was happy to sign divorce papers. So you made yourself not care too.   And it continued to snowball like that.   Before you knew it, you were telling your families that the divorce was happening, much to their distress. Before you knew it, here you were.   By the time you get out of the bathroom, Yoongi’s gone.   He probably left for some peace and quiet. After all, it’s volatile when you’re together. It’s not like you want it to be that way, it just became that way. What sucks the most is that you know he’s right. You’re part to blame for the recent argument. You got too worked up unnecessarily. You’re constantly on the defensive as if he’s out to attack you. And once it’s quiet, you hate that you shouted.   But he has his own part to blame too. Yoongi knows how to get under your skin. He knew he was egging you on and he didn’t stop. So it escalated and escalated.   You end up wandering the resort by yourself. You enjoy the sunset on the beach and when the dinner buffet is open, you sit alone with your plate, staring out into the empty abyss of the ocean shrouded in darkness. All around you, there are families and lovers, jovial music that’s inviting.   Yet you feel isolated in the crowd.   You try to move around, preoccupy yourself.    But the last thing you expect is to see Yoongi. Across the bar. With a pretty, young girl on his arm. A sun-kissed blonde, to be specific. Wearing a crop top with booty shorts.    Yoongi’s nursing a whisky on the rocks, his usual drink, as she grasps onto his bicep. The swell of her breasts are practically pushed onto him. She says something and he smiles.   At the same time, something boils in the pit of your stomach. It’s pure, unadulterated rage.   Before you know it, you’ve turned on your heel and beelined to the hotel lobby bar. You call yourself hard liquor and down the drink as you seethe. The image of him and that Barbie doll is seared into your mind, flashing beneath your eyelids each time you blink.   The liquid burns and tears pool into your eyes, but you hold them back.   The bar is busy, filled of guests constantly ordering, so no one notices that you keep downing bitter drinks until there’s a tap on your shoulder—   “Aloha.” A concerned employee looms over you. “Is everything alright?”   That’s when you realize you’ve been drinking by yourself for three full hours. The table’s crowded with glasses and the ones on the edge are a centimeter away from falling over.   You end up waving him away and stumbling back to the room.   The world is teetering and you try to lean onto the wall for balance. It’s a miracle that you pressed the right number on the elevator when everything was swirling together. Or at least, you’re pretty sure this is the right floor.   You pound on the door. “Yoongiiiiii! Yoongiii! Open up!”   When there’s no response, you mutter ‘asshole’. Then your eye peels open and you realize you’ve been knocking against the door of the ice and vending machine room. You turn on your heel and careen to the next door.   “Yooongiiii!” you whine his name in exasperation, cheek pressed against the smooth surface.   You only have to call out twice before the door’s suddenly swinging open and you’re falling into the arms of your (soon-to-be ex-) husband. “‘Bout time. Was waiting foreverrr!”   “Fuck.” Yoongi’s nose scrunches at the smell of alcohol and he grabs a hold of your shoulders, pulling you away from him, nose scrunched at your smell. He keeps you at a safe distance as if you were nervous middle-schoolers at your first dance. You hate it. Why can’t he just hug you? “God, how much did you drink, Y/N?”   “Dunno. Lost my key card.”   “What?”   The door swings shut.   “Are you banging a chick in our room?” you slur, trying to keep your eyes open to look at him. He was already changed into his soft pajamas, a blue checkered print that made him look so much cuter. It’s unfair. “Am I interrupting?”   His brows cinch together, lips turning down. Yoongi’s visibly confused. “Ban—”   “Saw you talkin’ to that pretty girl at the bar,” you huff, wobbling back and forth.   He’s dumbfounded. “Who?”   “Don’t play stupid!” You poke his chest with your finger. “That lil girl who looks like a model!”   Yoongi winces at the volume of your voice and you add in frustration, “I’ll leave if you are, so just tell me already.”   “No, I’m not sleeping with anyone, Y/N.” Yoongi fixes his arm around your waist to keep you balanced and he sighs, reaching down to help you take off your shoes. “So much for knowing how to pace yourself, Y/N,” he mumbles with a faint smile on his lips instead of the annoyance you’re used to.   Yoongi loops your arm around his neck and begins to guide you towards the bed. But you stop, making your legs deadweight and you turn to him, staring into his eyes so deep, it’s like you’re looking into his soul. It’s pretty.   “What?” he asks, almost uncomfortable by your intense gawking.    “Do you not love me anymore?”   “What?”   “Just tell me, goddammit. Do you have no feelings towards me no more?” You pound your chest with your free hand. Yoongi plops you onto the love seat when he sees that you have no plans of making it to the bed. “Did everything mean nothin’ to you?”   He remains silent.   You angrily shout— “Answer me!”   Yoongi flinches. “God, Y/N. You don’t need to scream, I’m right next to you.” He sighs and drags a hand over his face. “If it meant nothing to me, do you think I’d be taking care of you right now? Now sit here and wait.”   With his dictatorial command wielded with his low voice, you pout but obey.    Yoongi returns a minute later with your pajamas in one hand and a cool glass of water in the other. “Drink this. And all of it.”   You nurse the glass of water with two hands and get a sip in. But your pout persists and before you know it, you’re bursting into tears. Yoongi all but freezes.   “’m sorry,” you sob, “I didn’t wanna fight.”   “Y/N.”   “I don’t mean to be so mad! I’m sorry.”   Yoongi kneels in front of you with a long sigh. “It’s okay, Y/N,” he coaxes and tugs the sleeve of his shirt to wipe the beads of teardrops trekking down your cheeks. “I know you didn’t mean it.”   “Really?”   “Yes. If anything….I’m sorry too,” Yoongi mumbles solemnly and before you can react, he’s already moved on. “Now drink your water.”   You cry into your glass, but you down the entire thing like he said and your crying stops by the end.   “Arms up,” Yoongi commands and you listen to him. He peels off your shirt in one single swoop and tosses it aside. He helps you put on your pajama top without blinking an eye and pulls the hem of your leggings to replace those as well. Yoongi even takes a damp washcloth to wipe your face and you watch him the entire time. His lashes are long, and Yoongi’s so nice and reliable. “Let's get you to bed, alright?”   You nod, and he guides you to it, having cleared the rose petals earlier. “So you didn’t sleep with her?”   “No.”   “Why not? She was hot!”   “I wasn’t interested.”   “Really?”   “Really,” Yoongi assures as he sets you to sit on the edge of the mattress. He moves to pull the sheets and struggles with how tucked in they are. In the meanwhile, you get the greatest idea you’ve ever had—   “Then fuck me instead before you fuck her.”   “What?”   Yoongi’s entire body goes rigid and he whips his head towards you with eyes that nearly bulge out of their sockets. You pout at him. “I wanna suck your dick and feel it in me, Yoongi. I miss it. When we used to have sex. It was so good.”   “Oh, you are so drunk.” He chuckles, a sound that sounds so nice you wish you can hear it forever and ever. “You’re going to be so embarrassed when you wake up tomorrow, Y/N.”   Yoongi pulls the sheet and is about to get you tucked in. But you steal the opportunity when he gets close and you loop your arms around his neck. “No, I’m not.” Your voice drops into a whisper. “Remember when you used to spit in my mouth? And you liked it sooo much.” You giggle when you notice his ears becoming hot and red. “You still like it now, don’t you, you nasty freak!”   You smack him on the shoulder in the midst of your bubbling laughter and he winces.    “Ow!”   “Imagine if I got pregnant from it too!” you add in your hysterics.   “Let’s not.”   “I always thought our kids would be so cute. Especially if they got your cheeks.” You reach and tug on Yoongi’s cheeks while giggling. He lets you have your fun, staying still and letting you squish his face together. And in your drunken state, you don’t realize how tender his eyes become.   “We’re getting a divorce, Y/N.”   You frown. “Why on earth would we do that?”   “Because,” he murmurs.   “Let’s not,” you slur. “Can’t we cancel it?”   It goes quiet with Yoongi gazing into your eyes. “Do you even know what you’re saying?”   “Yeah.” You grow sheepish. “Aren’t you supposed to get a divorce if you hate each other?”   “That’s how it works generally.” Yoongi stands and gently presses on your shoulder to lay you down. The pillows feel soft underneath your head and he starts to tug the covers up to your chin.   “But I don’t hate you. I care a loooooot about you.” You sulk. “Otherwise, why’d I get jealous when I saw you at the bar?”   The corner of his mouth tugs. “So you’re admitting you were jealous?”   “Wouldn’t you get jealous if you saw me with someone else?”   Yoongi thinks about it. “Maybe.”   “Maybe?”   He finally admits, “Yeah, I’d be pretty pissed.”   You hum contently, lids becoming uncontrollably heavier. You want to stay up. It’s so much fun talking to Yoongi. It feels like forever since you talked to him like this. But you’re so tired. And comfortable. You want him to cuddle and spoon you to sleep. Yoongi cuddles are the best.   “Yooongiiii.”   You call out to him with your eyes closed.   “Yeah?”   “I think—” You go dead quiet and after three seconds, he thinks you’ve fallen asleep, but then your mouth moves again. “—I loooove you.” A beat later, your two arms suddenly raises up into the air. Hands measuring about a ruler stick length. “This much.”   He snorts and turns off the lamp. “Go to sleep, Y/N.”   …   When you wake up the next morning, your head is absolutely pounding.   For the first time, you detest how much light the damn room lets in. You also curse aging and having to suffer hangovers when five years ago, you were perfectly unscathed the next day after drinking.   Luckily, there’s advil on the bedside with a tall glass of water and you down the entire thing after taking a pill. You’re not so sure where these came from, but your answer is across the room.   Yoongi, realizing you’re awake, has an amused smile on his face and his brow cocked. More importantly, his eyes have somehow softened.   You groan, remembering last night. Every detail. Every word. Like a film that could be played back. It’s mortifying and even without your obvious reaction, Yoongi’s been with you long enough to know how superb your memory is even after being wasted. He knows you know.   And the worst part?    You meant it all.
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babygirl-diaz · 3 years ago
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Hey if you’re taking request/ideas for a JEALOUS!Bucky Sambucky fic i have an idea.
Bucky and Sam aren’t together yet, but Torres confides (or Bucky finds out) that Torres likes Sam (come on the flirty banter between Torres and Sam in Ep1 was so fun and so cute!) Bucky obviously gets jealous cause he thinks Sam would date Torres over him(even though Sam sees Torres as a kid/protege).
Sam has to tell Bucky he’s an idiot, as usual, and the two get together.
((Sorry this took me like over a month, anon! I had writer's block for the longest time. Anyway, I hope you like it!
A big thank you to @redwingsupportgroup for helping me with the plot!))
***
Bucky loved watching Sam soar through the sky. He never seemed more like himself than when he was up in the clouds, flying around like an angel. He looked like an angel, too. An angel that Bucky was in love with.
Bucky was actually about to confess his love to Sam today when Sam’s Air Force buddies put a dent in his plan.
“Hey, Barnes! Over here!” One of them, Eddie, called him over while he was watching Sam train Torres.
Bucky wasn’t too keen on being cordial with these guys, but they were nice enough that he gave up and went over to where they were hanging out.
After a round of handshakes and claps on the back, they finally told him why they had called him over.
“We’re making a bet over here. You want in?” Jason, one of the other pilots, asked.
“Bet on what?” Bucky asked, confused.
“How long till Torres tells Sam how he feels about him?”
Bucky felt the earth shift right from under his feet. “W- what?”
“What?” Asked Evan. “Didn’t you know? I mean, it’s kinda obvious, man. Joaquin is gone for Sam.”
The rest of their gang agreed and laughed as Bucky’s heart broke over here. Bucky looked up at the sky where Sam was training Torres and frowned.
“Jokes apart, I think they’d make a great couple,” said Jason. “Torres is great for Sam. Perfect in fact.”
“Yeah, can’t argue with that,” Evan agreed. “I mean, there’s the age gap, but I guess love doesn’t care about age.”
“Who cares about an age gap,” Liam, another pilot, chimed in. “Torres will keep Sam happy, and that’s what matters. After everything Sam went through with Riley, the man deserves happiness.”
Bucky couldn’t argue with that. Sam deserved all the happiness in the world. And if Torres was the one to give it to him, then so be it. Bucky could deal with his own heartbreak. Though what was he supposed to do about the jealousy that was rearing its ugly head? The idea of Sam and Torres made Bucky see red. It made Bucky want to take Sam far away from here and away from Torres.
“Barnes!”
“Huh?” Bucky looked up to find Jason giving him a suspicious look.
“You okay, man?” Jason continued to ask.
“Yeah, I’m good,” Bucky lied and offered him a tight smile.
“So I was asking if you were in?” Eddie asked.
“In what?”
“The bet!” Eddie laughed, clapping him on the back.
“Nah, man, I’m out,” Bucky gave them a polite. “I’ll see ya guys around.”
“Wait, you’re not gonna wait for Sam?” Liam asked.
“Nah, it seems like he’ll be long,” Bucky replied. “I’ll catch him back at the hotel.”
***
“Great job out there, man, you’re getting good at this,” Sam praised Joaquin once they finished training and changed into their streetwear.
Joaquin laughed awkwardly and rubbed the back of his neck. “Thanks, Sam. What can I say, you’re an amazing teacher.”
Sam beamed at him. “Anyway, I’ll see ya next week, yeah?”
“I’ll be here!” Joaquin told him excitedly
As Sam walked away, he came across his Air Force friends inside the hanger. He approached them, intending to say hi when he overheard their conversation. That made him hide behind a pillar.
“Do you think Joaquin told Sam?” Evan was asking.
“I still say it will take at least a month for Torres to admit that he’s in love with him,” said Liam.
Sam’s jaw dropped slightly when he heard that. Joaquin was in love with him? That couldn’t be true. He gave no indication that he was in love with him. These guys had to have it wrong.
“Nah, man, Torres has waited too long. He’ll do it tonight,” Jason chimed in. “So be ready to pay up.”
Pay up?!
Sam stormed over to the group, who immediately stopped talking when they saw him approach.
“Oh, hey Sam!” Liam greeted him cheerfully.
“Don’t ‘hey Sam’ me,” Sam retorted.
“I’m guessing you heard all of that?” Jason said, scratching the back of his head.
“Yeah, all of it,” Sam replied. “Y’all are betting on when Joaquin will tell me he loves me?” Sam huffed. “That’s just messed up.”
“Sorry,” all of them said in unison and had the sense to look down in embarrassment.
“What Joaquin feels or doesn’t feel for me is none of your business,” Sam told them.
“We were just having a bit of fun,” Liam tried justifying their actions.
“Not at my expense, you’re not,” Sam informed him. “Who else is involved in the betting pool?”
“No one,” Eddie replied. “We asked Barnes, but he turned us down…”
Bucky. Bucky knew. He knew about the bet and Joaquin’s crush and he didn’t tell him. Some best friend he was.
“Before you go off on Barnes,” said Jason, as if reading his mind. “He just found out, like 30 minutes ago. And he turned us down.”
Sam would deal with Bucky later. Right now, he had to find Joaquin and set some things right.
Sam went off looking for Joaquin and found him in the parking lot. “Joaquin!” He ran up to the younger man, who grinned when he saw him.
“Hey, Sam. Forget something?”
“I think we need to talk,” said Sam.
The smile fell from Joaquin’s face when he probably noticed the serious look on Sam’s.
“What is it? Is everything okay?” Joaquin asked, worried.
“There is no easy way for me to ask this, man, but do you have feelings for me?”
Joaquin’s eyes widened and he spluttered. “W- what? Who told you that?”
“Is it the truth?” Sam asked
Joaquin looked like he was contemplating his answer. “Yeah, it is.” He replied awkwardly. “I love you, Sam.”
“Joaquin--”
“You don’t have to say anything,” Joaquin said sadly. “I know you don’t feel the same way. That’s why I never told you. You only see me as a mentee and a friend. And… you have feelings for Barnes.”
Okay, that last part was unexpected. “Bucky and I are not--”
Joaquin gave him a pointed look. “It’s obvious, Sam. You are clearly in love with him. I can see it in the way you look at him. You should tell him.”
“I can’t. It will ruin our friendship.”
Joaquin sighed and shook his head. “It won’t. He clearly feels the same way. The puppy dog look he gives you says it all.” Joaquin put a hand on Sam’s shoulder and gave him a sad smile. “Just because I can’t have the person I love doesn’t mean you can’t either. Take care. I will see you next week.” With that, he got into his car, leaving Sam standing there with a million different thoughts running through his head.
***
When Sam got back to the hotel, he didn’t find Bucky in their shared room. Knowing exactly where the super soldier went, Sam headed downstairs to the bar, and just as he had suspected, he found Bucky sitting in the far corner nursing a glass of whiskey.
“What’s the point of you drinking if you can’t get drunk?” Sam asked, approaching the other man.
“I like the taste,” Bucky grumbled. “You’re back early. Thought you’d be out with your friends… with Torres.” He said the last part so softly that Sam would have almost missed it had he not been standing so close.
“Why didn’t you tell me about the bet?” Sam asked
“I just found out today. Didn’t get the time to tell you,” Bucky replied and took a sip from his glass. He refused to look at Sam.
“So you know that Torres…”
“...Is in love with you?” Bucky scoffed. “Yeah.”
Sam sat down next to Bucky at the bar and sighed. “Buck--”
“Sam, what are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be with him?”
“Why would I be with Joaquin?”
“Seeing how he is the love of your life and all,” Bucky retorted.
“He’s not the love of my life…” Sam trailed off.
“He’s not?” Bucky finally looked at him.
“No,” Sam replied.
“Well, he should be. He’s a great guy. He will be good for you.”
“But what if I don’t want a great guy? What if I want someone flawed and a complete dumbass?” Sam mumbled, leaning closer to Bucky.
Bucky searched his eyes for something before whispering, “Sam…”
“What if I want you?” Sam finally asked.
Without a word, Bucky surged forward and kissed him.
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judyhopps934-mt-zd · 4 years ago
Text
Thoughts on Lies
Warning: Spoilers! And possibly having your heart torn into pieces. Other than that, have fun!
We open up with Marinette figuring out the recipes for the power ups as the new guardian.
I am disappointed that she still has not stopped oogooling over Adrien when he appeared on the news. Especially since she was allegedly with Luka by then. (I'll explain what I mean in just a minute)
Adrien was tired after the day he had as Adrien, which is a contrast of what Marinette believes his life is like. But being Chat Noir is the highlight of his day...
...only to not see Ladybug show up for patrols. And we see that it was all due to her figuring out the powerups.
Also, the patrols are a thing in cannon and I am still not over it after "Truth".
Chat Noir hoping for an akumatization so he can escape his civilian life radiated the same energy as Alya asking for akumatizations to interview the temporary heroes on her IG post. I get it, but still! We do not have people in danger for our needs.
Plagg being the one who announces any voice messages for Chat and asking for cheese through the feature on the Chat Phone brings me a whole other level of life.
Also, the whole milk thing at Le Grand Paris bar counter. It was hilarious, but also very sad. He really missed his m'lady
He ends the patrol after he saw Kagami training with her mom. And the smiles on his face! *Cries in Marichat and Ladynoir*
Plagg is the one that encourages Adrien to move on from Adrien, just like he applauded him from doing so in Loveater.
Kagami apparently said that fencing lessons are scheduled an hour in advance and Adrien (with that goofy grin on his face) knew what was up!
Both Ms. Tsurugi and Gabriel are very pissed at one another for the schedule change. That's hilarious, although everything comes at a price.
The parallels! Kagami is apparently learning Russian at her mother's request. Truly is a reflection of Adrien, civilian life wise.
Kagami? Lying???? The hell???? Who are you and what have you done to Kagami????? (Why am I surprised, y'all did this in Desperada)
She lies to their parents and the teacher to be in the art room with Adrien. I get it, teenage rebellion after being under an uninvolved parent, but still!
I like how the writers gave Kagami another dimension by saying she loves art, but her mom does not like her passion for drawing.
To Kagami's mom: WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOUR DAUGHTER IS NOT GOOD ENOUGH???!!! HER DRAWINGS BELONG IN A MUSEUM!
Also, art reflecting the truth? Hmmm.....
Since people like mentioning that Marinette has a thing for people with absent parents after "Truth", I will now say that Adrien has a thing for people who are great at drawing. I do not take criticism.
Kagami is hinting that Adrien's civilian life is not his true self (thank you for understanding him!)...
...but also says that being a "clown" (it was the Chat pose) is also not who he really is. The fandom would disagree with you. Although that brings up the question of whether both personalities merge to form who he really is and cannot be seen completely by anyone in any part of his life. But he is more like Chat Noir regardless.
Also, I want to see Adrien and Kagami spend more time together prior to this episode to see why she was not pleased with him being a clown if that's who he truly is, because her repositioning him against the wall made me feel like she is trying to place Adrien into a mold that reflects the image she might have created in her mind. (I don't know, this was just the first thought that came in my mind.)
They almost kiss, with Adrien being taken into shock (not terrified as we thought) until the alarm saying they have fencing lessons starting interrupts them and Adrien runs out, not before BLUSHING LIKE HELLO?!?!?
This is what I referred to in my second point and confirms what everyone was saying about this episode: this is "Truth", but through Adrien's perspective. Finally, an Adrien-centered episode!!!
To continue, every time Adrien and Kagami are together or were about to kiss, a sentimonster appears, with Ladybug trying to do something about it. Just like Lukanette, just like Adrigami: being a superhero affects your love life as a civilian.
Chat being thrown off the roof by accident and being rescued will never get old or less funny lol.
Montages continues up until the boat scene, where Adrien missed the intro to the performance, but I will never get over the fact as to how Adrien made it there before Marinette. It is beyond me.
Kagami not letting Adrien stay for 5 more minutes. Hmm...
Their cute moment together was what will lead to the demise of Adrigami as Kagami noticed he dropped the infamous lucky charm bracelet. *le gasp!
Why *le gasp*? Because 1) I fear it symbolizes that something will happen to Adrienette or that Adrien has forgotten about her, and 2) Wait until later.
Kagami revealed she lied so she can spend more time with Adrien alone, lying about leaving rehearsal earlier, lying about the fencing lessons rescheduling, and who else knows what else so she can be with him.
She tells him she loves him. But Adrien notices Ladybug and an Akuma. Oh boy, he wasn't able to give her any attention.
Because he left towards the direction of the boat (and said he left something there), Kagami used that to conclude it had something to do with Marinette. Oh boy.
Either I missed an entire scene about Ladybug knowing ShadowMoth's name, or we were not supposed to know how they know until this episode. It feels out of place to me, but oh well.
"I..am...AN INCREDIBLE SWIMMER!" still cracks me up even when I know how important it was in protecting her secret identity.
Happy Birthday Prince Ali!
Apparently, Kagami lied that her mom was in charge of watching over Adrien (or maybe not? I can't tell at this point.)
Yep, Kagami believes that Adrien is going after Marinette and probably resents them both if her facial expression says anything
We get to see that Ladynoir moment from "Truth"!! I love these two and their banter.
Adrienette stans, not much has changed. Adrien was concerned that he lost the Lucky Charm bracelet, for real. But said again because he though he would be clear of the lie since he thought he had it on him.
Kagami confronts him with it. AND THIS IS HIS SHOCKED FACE SCENE FROM THE TRAILER!!!
Thinking that she lies to get out of being with her, she leaves. With the bracelet. The leaving part is understandable, especially because she does not know about him being Chat Noir or what entails him to do. But why take the bracelet???
Adrien is also saddened by what happened. He also liked her.
We've never seen that part of city hall. Well designed in my opinion.
She was the akuma in City Hall with the glowing sphere! We were right!!!
Adrien feels guilty, though it is not really his fault. He has a duty to Paris!
Why is the music sounding different in French.
Jagged Stone. How do I feel about you after learning you purposefully abandoned Luka and apparently Juleka? Also, what's with the song??? (Rhetorical question. Do not answer)
We were wrong about Kagami's power: it paralyzes people who lie, not kill everything in its path.
Jagged, you abandoned your children. And you apparently lied about your age?!?!?! Both episodes show something about Jagged Stone that make him seem like an awful person on the inside.
Ladybug, how do you know about Lies's powers?!?!? There is a hole in the plot here! Unless there were other paralyzed civilians that gave her power a dead giveaway.
Chat Noir, if you lie as a civilian for whatever reason, of course Ladybug will too, since as a civilian, you need to lie to keep your secret identity a secret. Same rules apply to Ladybug, especially as the guardian.
The Lucky Charm is a drone, not a camera like I thought. How the hell did I get into an ivy if I can't tell the difference?!?!
Chat Noir pretending to lie is funny. It might also be his peppy attitude to lying. Also, his funnier version of ShadowMoth's name.
Ladybug finds the akumatized object and gasps. I wonder if its only a eureka moment or also the fact that she recognizes the bracelet, especially if its custom made.
Brutally honest people does not exist (we have all lied at some point, even Kagami who is usually brutally honest with people), but animals can't lie.
Fang being involved in destroying the akuma is cool.
This is the moment that we dreaded so much, yet knew was coming: CHAT NOIR DIES!
JK! He actually is paralyzed by truth because he jumped into the glowing orb. We were right that this is an anguishing scene to watch, but we're wrong about the part that he's killed. Yet, he still unnecessarily sacrificed himself and caused Ladybug to be angst about it.
WHAT IS UP WITH CHAT NOIR BEING HAPPY ABOUT SACRIFICING HIMSELF?!?!? AND DO NOT SAY ITS BECAUSE HE TRUSTS LADYBUG!
Yes Ladybug. Chat is crazy. And also crazy for you. And you are right about the crazy unconscious part. My Ladynoir heart!
ShadowMoth almost won until Fang bit off the charm bracelet. Thanks Fang!
Chat backing away from Fang licking him is a mood.
My favorite Ladynoir moment of the evening: Ladybug telling Chat to stop sacrificing himself and Chat saying she likes her adorable angry face. Her smirk afterwards.. And then their pound it.
But no seriously Chat. You need to stop doing that to Ladybug. She cannot take it anymore
Plagg said that even if Adrien loves someone else, he is likely to go back to Ladybug. Just like he goes back to Camembert. Seriously, despite his cheese analogies, he gives great wisdom.
Not Kagami almost beating up Adrien during his fencing lessons. And Mr. D'Angercourt notices this too as he stopped Kagami's final blow.
Also, isn't it illegal in fencing to push people? Oh boy.
And there's the Adrigami breakup scene: Adrien telling Kagami that he enjoys their time together and Kagami knowing their is sincerity in him. It is sort of unclear who actually ended things when Adrien asks if they could still be friends, but Kagami ends it all by saying that she will let him know once she can face him again. Ouch.
Adrien is hurt and stares at the lucky charm bracelet with what looks like sadness. Once again ouch.
Like Lukanette, I want to see Adrien and Kagami be happy together at least until halfway through this season. The issue is that it will hurt them more in the end.
Also, I noticed the difference between Luka and Kagami when ending their respective relationships. It hurt them both, but Kagami was more forward about it and Luka was somewhat passive. It could be based on what they know about their now exes (Luka knew that Marinette had feelings for Adrien and was not secretive about it even when they were together if the truths her friends said and the opening scene to this episode reflect this, whereas Kagami only has a suspicion and Adrien does not say anything regarding to it.
Also, I really did not like how the breakup on this end resulted in. While more realistic for a lot of people, it did not help that it involved Kagami as there are people who will go after Kagami after watching this episode, and I believe that the writers know this. Kagami is a good person who has a different response to the trust issues and lack of communication, as well as lies in their relationship. Not saying its a perfect one, but an understandable one. In conclusion, don't trash Kagami, especially if you saw this coming.
I take back what I said before; this is my favorite Ladynoir scene. I want to hug them both because they have to lie and keep secrets from everyone, even have some secrets between themselves! But at least they can trust each other! Excuse me while I cry over how much we are being fed. Also, the fact that they broke up with their respective partners makes this both heartwarming and heart breaking.
Overall, this episode is just as good as Lies! It is the first fully Adrien-centered episode, which makes this a first and already exciting. While I did not like how their breakup was handled, it was realistic and showed that honesty and communication are important. Also, can my children be happy together for longer than an episode??? I swear, their pain hurts me.
But at least Ladybug and Chat Noir have each other's company to get them through. May us Ladynoir stans continue to be fed!
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lovee-infected · 4 years ago
Note
For the anon talking about how they hate how over exaggerated a character is. I am not trying to start hate or anything, but if you don't like the way how someone portrays the character, just stop reading it. Some people don't delve deep, they just want to write fanfics for fun they're not going to make sure it's 100% the characters VERY complex personalities. Or the way how they view a character is different from their beliefs. I've gotten this message before and I am TIRED of it
I think it's a good time to talk about this because I've been thinking about bringing the topic up for a while. To begin with, let's clear something between the two anons because I think it's a misunderstanding:
Note: Please read this, this is important.
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Anon A is saying that they're sometimes bothered by how some fanfics and Aus have a different way of picturing character X, in other words, they don't really enjoy it when a character is bring mischaracterized
Anon B (this anon) is saying that if you're bothered by a fic because you don't like how they're characterizing an specific character, then you don't have to read it.
Let me say that both of these anons are right, yet to think that their ideas are the opposites of each other, is totally wrong. In other words they both have a point, but I guess their points needs a stronger a better way of being explained in order to avoid any further dramas and misunderstandings.
Why am I doing this? Because I've seen -enough- of it. After the twst character analyses, aruges toward the mischaracterizations in this fandom became a thing, it's been causing some issues and arguments between the fans and it's mainly because of how sides fails to explain their points clearly.
Though I didn't really receive any rude asks/comments regarding myself the matter I can still how some fans feel attacked, offended or called out by character analysis posts or have the NERVE to attack or offend others with their own perspective on characters and try to force others into accepting them.
Enough with drama, I'm sick of it. I'm going to explain this as clearly as I can, hopeful that this would at least lessen the chance of having to go through another drama regarding the mischaracterization issue.
1) The concept of FANfiction
First off, the fanfiction itself; what is a fanfiction? What type of writing is considered to be a fanfic? What is it even used for? These are the questions we all need to answer before getting to know the world of fanfic.
Just as its name explains, it's fan + fiction. It's the result of the fan's creativity and imagination taking place in a fictional plot, something that hasn't happened with the original characters and he original story. The fans' imagination is often far beyond the plot which the original story/series/book offers, yet this isn't going to hold fans back from imagining it. Fanfiction is the way of giving yourself (or others) the specific and plot with the original and canon version isn't going to give you, in other words it's a way of getting what you wish to see through a story but this time, it's you who'd decide what will happen.
You are the one who decides how characters will be, you are the one who decides how and where this story happens and you are the one to choose how this story must come to an end. It's all about your own imagination and creativity, which enables you to have power over everything about your own story and fanfiction, everything (In expection gor than legal issues including claiming the original character as yours). You have the power, and you choose how it should be.
2) Fanfiction and mischaracterization
This was mainly the most brought up issue in the recent Twst drama, mischaracterization through writings. Many were saying how they find this annoying and nerve-wrecking, but no one really talked about how mischaracterization comes to life.
Let me tell you, as long your writing is a fanfic, there is a 70% chance of mischaracterizing the plot or the characters and there's nothing wrong with it, that's just how fanfiction works! It isn't supposed to be canon, it is fanon and only fanon. Everything that happens is fictional and fanon based, in other words, it's the fan who decides what should happen in a fanfiction and how it's supposed to be!
One of the Fanfiction's best purposes is giving the fandom a chance to mischaracterize! To write the characters the way they wish them to be and not necessarily the way they truly are. Fanfiction allows us to imagine and create something that isn't true, so let me clear my point here: It's totally okay to change the characters' personalities in your fanfics! As the writer, you have the right to do so, and since writing a fanfic must be for your own pleasure in the first place, no one can stop you from imagining whatever you want! No one can jump out and say stuff like "YOU CAN'T MISCHARACERTIZE A CHARACTER IN A FANFICTION" because that'd be super lame. It's your own fanfiction, your story, your creation and you're free to mischaracterize if that's how you like it to be! And if anyone doesn't like that, remember that they don't have to read that.
3)What is the problem?
Look, we've been going through some drama because of the recent character analyses of twst fandom, and I'd like to explain why. First off, note that I think both sides of the argument have been wrong and I'm going to talk about both of them.
Let me begin with a small example: It's been argued that based to what we've seen from Leona's personality so far, he doesn't seem to be the type to love healthily or even easily fall for anyone. Some of the fans seemed to be offended by the statement and said that "They still want their Leona fluff no matter what everyone else says" okay okay, this is the problem I was talking about: Saying that canon Leona doesn't seem to be much of a fluffy lion or a sweet lover isn't equal to forbidding the fans from writing fluffs for him or picturing him as a adorable and gentle lover! No one has the right to hold fans back from appreciating and enjoying what they like! But it's important to know what exactly is happening.
I'll talk about some crucial points you need to know about character analyses and how it's different from a fanfic in part (4), but before that, let me continue to give some examples of the recent argues and how each of the sides were wrong.
A) You enjoy reading fluffy Malleus content but character analyses have been saying that he isn't as soft and cute as you'd expected him to be. Does this mean that you can no longer ask for wholesome Malleus content or enjoy reading them? -> Of course not! You're still free to read/imagine/write whatever you like with Malleus! No one has the right to tell you what to do, and character analyses aren't meant to be a way to hold you back from enjoying what you like! If you're enjoying something, go for it! In this fanon world no one can accuse you for not following the canon interpretations!
B) You've spent a rather long time getting to know Ace and his canon personality, and you really like the way he is! But by reading fanfics/ fandom's interpretations on him you can't help but to feel like they aren't giving his personality the justice he deserves, and aren't seeing the great and amazing character he truly is. Is it okay to feel upset about this? -> Just as I said, it's totally fine to have your personal interpretations of a character no matter how different the rest of the interpretations are! But the real question is: what should you do when you think fandom isn't doing a character justice? This would be answered in part D!
C) You are enjoying your personal ideas and headcanons with Idia and many are saying that your way of picturing him is so adorable! Does this necessarily mean that the canon Idia as well is like you describe him? -> Absolutely not! No matter how adorable an Au/headcanon is, everyone's free to enjoy it but you should remember that canon ≠ fanon. You are totally free to imagine whatever you'd like! But keep this in mind that you shouldn't insist on your ideas being necessarily canon!
D) You feel like many are mischaracterizing your favorite character and you don't like it, what should you do? -> Well to begin with, remember that other fans have the right to characterize a character just as much as you do! You can't stop them from doing what they like or expect them to change the way they are because of how different the canon interpretation of a character might be. But you as well have a great chance to inspire the fandom by your own ideas! You can try to discuss how different the canon personality of your favorite character is and even try to turn that into a character analysis! This way you'd not only avoid causing any drama because of disagreeing with someone's way of picturing your favorite character, but you will also have a chance to present your personal ideas and characterizations to the fandom in a friendly and polite way!
E) You don't like how an author is characterizing some of the boys, what should you do? -> Easy solution, don't read it. Let me tell you, I have gone through this a lot and do you know what I do whenever I read/see something that doesn't match my tastes and expectations? I keep scrolling! That's all, I don't have to like it, but I don't have to read it either! 😀
F) You're an author and a writing request is asking you to write for a character in a way you just can't or don't want to write because that goes totally against your idealistics and ideas on a character, for example: You just can't write something really wholesome and fluffy for Leona because you can't imagine him being like that, what should you do? -> It's obvious, then don't write it! You have the right to choose what you'd like to write and how you like to picture a character no matter what others think. If you want to picture Leona as an emotional and soft boy, it's totally okay! If you want to picture him as a cold-hearted and mean prince, again it's totally alright! Remember, just like fans you have the right to picture and characterize the characters the way you want to, and no one can tell you otherwise!
G) You've read a character analysis and you realize that you've been mischaracterizing Floyd for a while, should you feel bad or sorry about it? -> Of course not!! Even if you were mischaracterizing him, keep this mind that there's nothing wrong with picturing Floyd as the way you want him to be! As long as you don't claim your headcanons to be canon and share stuff like "Canon from is definitely like this" or "Floyd would do that, canon! ^-^" it's totally alright to imagine him the way you like!
H) You saw someone saying something about Malleus that didn't match the canon interpretations of him. You quickly replied to then and corrected them about their wrong point of view and tell them how the real Malleus is, which kinda led to and argument between you and the person, did you do the right thing? -> Absolutely not! Attacking others out of nowhere and without any context isn't the right way of introducing the canon characterizations to the fandom! Even if you were right, keep this in mind that the other person has the right to picture Malleus or any other character the way they want them to be so if you want to correct them or try to get to know the canon character interpretations, you should do that from the logical and polite way.
I) Someone wrote a character analysis for Idia and said how they find it so annoying when people who refer to Idia as "Baby" and "uwu beanie". You often refer to Idia as baby or cutie yourself and the context of that analysis/general post some how got to you. You feel lowkey attacked and offended, did the original poster say the right thing? -> No, matter what the context is or how accurate and well-written that analysis was, directly calling people who have a certain way of picturing a character "Annoying" is rude no matter how you think of it. Even if the original poster were right about Idia not being UWU, their way of wording their sentence wasn't really pleasant; keep this, in mind that everyone in the fandom is free to picture Idia as they like and it doesn't even matter if you don't like it or not! If you're going to write an analysis/essay regarding a character's personality, remember that you should prove your point and disagree with opposite opinions through logical reasoning and explaining your point, NOT by offending and attacking other ideas by savage contexts like "You have to stop saying that Idia is like this", "I hate it when people say Idia is like this", " It's so annoying to see people saying Idia is like this... "
4) What's with the character analyses then?
There's a difference from the canon and fanon interpretations of a character, this is a truth which cannot be denied. But it's important to remember that just because a canon interpretation of a character exists, you can no longer enjoy the fanon interpretations!
Even I, for example, enjoy picturing someone like Malleus as an purely evil being like Maleficent herself because I enjoy seeing him as a perfect figure for "Mister of all Evil", but in my Malleus analysis post I explained how we should NOT think that Malleus is nothing but pure evil or a heartless monster! See, this is the difference I've been talking about. I'm pretty well-familiar with the canon Malleus, but I'm also enjoying the my own fanon Malleus and I know that the Evil Malleus I admire is a fanon one, not the canon one!
The thing is, character analyses aren't meant to be a way to hold anyone back from enjoying their fanon interpretations or imagining what they like, they aren't call out posts either. They are simply a way of getting to know the characters as if you're getting to know one of your irl friends. You come to think of them, see how deep their personalities are and get to learn more about them!
It's true that reading a character analysis might make you realize that you've been somehow mischaracterizing a character but this, isn't anything to be sorry or frustrated about! Character analyses are written to learn us more about our favorite characters, or as I like to name it, they want to show us that they're a lot more that we may imagine them to be!
Now, you may wonder how can we write a good character analysis without getting out of the line, offending anyone or giving out any cheap information?
I, personally, am pretty strict when asked to do a character analysis. Doesn't matter if I like the character or not, I'd try to judge them nonetheless. You HAVE to talk about both good features and bad features, and you must strictly avoid your analysis from getting personal; you have to make sure that your personal thoughts, feelings and emotions regarding a character aren't effecting your analysis. You shouldn't be writing it in a way to show off with your analytical ideas either.
Some people think coming off as rude would make them sound valid and acceptable, or they might just be used to being a little offensive in general, but as I explained in part 3-I, I won't recommend using any harsh or mean languages at all. Let me note that your way of wording your ideas is crazily important and if you're not careful enough with what you say and how you describe your ideas, your post would be not only be not much helpful as an analysis but also a cause of more drama and arguments. Also, keep this in mind that even the best of character analyses can't totally catch the characters' personalities correctly because we do not own them! Twisted wonderland's characters are a property of aniplex and neither me not anyone else in this fandom has the right to claim what a character is 100% like unless Disney officially releases those details!
Writing character analyses can be hard, from finding enough of hints to defend your point to choosing the right Grammer and way of speaking to avoid any further misunderstandings. But remember, those who write character analyses have no right to attack anyone because of them (They can oppose to different opinions of course, opposing ≠ attacking ), but keep this in mind that readers have no right to attack then because of their analysis either! See, that's a two-sided relationship. Both of the, sides have to learn to respect, both of the sides should, know, their boundaries and both of the sides have to be respectful!
Warning: When I say you're free to do or imagine whatever you wish to do, know that posting and sharing writings too has its own rules. Make sure to put the proper warnings, and avoid using any taboo or clearly impolite and sometimes, illegal concepts such as incest, pedophilia, etc.
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I actually had a lot more I wanted to say regarding the matter but I'm keeping it short, because I know that writing too much would make this boring and pretty hard to read. Hope that it's clear enough and avoid the possible future misunderstandings and arguments regarding the matter. Please, this isn't even about twst, it's about learning to respect each other it's about real life. Having people read THIS is a lot more important than having them read my character analyses or writings.
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lirbrarycrows · 4 years ago
Text
Various Fake Dating HCs
Various situations that require fake dating from there’s a creep, to a school play,  and how it becomes real 
AN/Yall know the drill. Caffeine, sugar, no sleep, binge writing session with no edits. That said if anyone catches a mistake please let me know Todoroki’s got a little away from me (def. was not 2 pages worth of google docs nope not me wrong writer) Enjoy!
Characters: Deku, Bakugou, Kaminari, Shinsou, Todoroki 
Word Count: 2520
Requests Open
Warnings: Mentions harassment
Deku 
Mineta wasn’t the only creep on campus and you were Class 1-E’s lucky lady as he called you thinking he was God’s gift to women
After 2 weeks of annoying you everyday after class was enough 
You’d complained to Deku and Uraka about it before so he was well aware of the jerk
When he approached you at lunch you couldn’t take it anymore
The moment he left you’d plopped your forehead onto Deku’s shoulder and asked Deku to help you out offering to buy him lunch for the week in return
He wasn’t sure how he could - he knew he couldn’t intimidate the guy like Kirishima or Bakugou so he wasn’t sure what you wanted
When you explained he’d gone pink but agreed
Since then he’d held your hand, helped you study, and called you honey and sweets when the creep was in earshot 
It took the jerk a while to realize you weren’t interested for some reason when he did though Deku kept up all the sweet gestures 
You told him a week after the last encounter with the creep that he could stop 
He’d just murmured (thinking you couldn’t here) “I don’t want to” 
You’d given him a kiss on the check and realizing you’d heard he’d launched into one of his patented spiels saying of course if you weren’t interested, and he still was focused on becoming the number 1 hero, and and and 
You’d wait for him to finish and look up at from the floor before giving him a smile and asking where he wanted to go on your first official date
Bakugou
It was his idea believe it or not. You both were good friends and after his internship he had several dedicates “fans” They’d gone so far as to track him down and asked him out incessantly 
The first time he’d scoffed and told them to get loss with his usual tact, that is to say none
After that when they’d followed him everyday from the gates of UA he’d blown up at them, literally 
Most of them were properly scared off by this or at least more reserved 1 girl just couldn’t take a hint
You and Bakugou had been sent to get snacks for movie night later and SHE was as always waiting on Bakugou
He’d groaned seeing her and whispered in you ear to play along 
Snaked his arms dangerously low around your waist, pulled you close
He purposefully didn’t look at her pretending he hadn’t already seen her
When you were out of the gates he spun you around and trapped you against the wall leaning in to whisper to you thanking you for playing along he asked if he could kiss you
You grabbed his face and pulled it towards your own
When you broke apart he smirked then pretended to take notice of the girl telling her off for spying on him and his girlfriend
You walked up behind him as he yelled at the girl and glared daggers at her 
She wasn’t happy about it but between both your threats she finally backed off (though she would occasionally pop up at public UA events) 
You were always with the Bakusquad so it was an easy matter to plant a kiss on his check and motion you were watching her in case she felt like trying anything
Neither of you were ready for or wanted a real relationship so that was as far as it went in high school but you keep in contact and who knows what the future holds
It did become a running joke how you two were such a lovey dovey couple in between the cursing each other out and harder than necessary slugs to the shoulder
Kaminari
You two flirted like there was no tomorrow 
Eventually everyone assumed you were dating bc who else flirts with every breath
One night you were running late and Kirishima had asked Denki “Where’s your girlfriend” 
It took him a second bc as much as you both flirted it was never serious
You’d popped in not a minute later and Kaminari had thrown his arm around you dramatically declaring “MY BEAUTIFUL GIRLFRIEND IS HERE” for everyone to here 
You looked at him quizzically and snorted
He managed to pull you away from the group and convince you it'd be a great joke to see how long you could convince the gang you were dating and how much drama you could create in your fake “relationship” 
You were plotting soap opera level storylines by the end of the night
After a week of scheming and late night writing session you started your personal drama with a dramatic monologue to the girls before class on how Kaminari had forgotten your so important 1 week-aversy 
-They’d consoled you and told you guys care about stuff but if you did you should talk to Kaminari
By lunch everyone had heard and Bakugou had a betting pool on how long the happy couple would last - Kaminari tried to join but was banned
Week 3 had the suspected cheating scandal - that had earned you a lecture from Kirishima on how it wasn’t manly to cheat and you assuring him nothing had actually happened 
By week 5 the two of you had a regular date scheming night 
During week 6 when Kirishima was “buzzed” after overusing his quirk he confessed to loving your (nonexistent) identical twin who conveniently went to another school and you had never spoken of bc she had stolen you last boyfriend
Towards the end of the term during date night Denki dropped to one knee proposing a proposal story line you’d burst out laughing when he grabbed a slap bracelet (He’d gotten from goodness knows where) and slapped it onto your wrist
At least take me on a real date first you’d joked - then frozen hoping he hadn’t heard 
He had. He took the slap bracelet off, still on one knee and said (Y/N) will you take this slap bracelet and go out with me for realizes I mean 
You’d ceremoniously take the slap bracelet and try to carefully put it on your wrist, treasuring it - slap bracelets can’t be gently moved though so it snapped up immediately as you said “I do” 
Shinsou
It wasn’t planned by either of you
You didn’t even know people though you were dating until a picture of the two of you showed up in the schools gossip column and someone pointed it out to you at lunch 
Shinsou just nodded his head and sighed saying “that makes sense” 
You had no idea what he was going on about - you found out that people had been kinder to him this morning some. Guys approached him about his “game” and some girl had talked to him saying if he was with you he couldn’t be as scary as he seemed 
You to were close and you knew how much it hurt him that people were scared of him bc of his quirk 
You were sitting so you leaned over and gave him a side hug promising him it would be okay
That hug went down the grapevine and “confirmed” your relationship 
By the time someone directly asked you about Shinsou the two of you had talked and agreed to let slide neither of you liked anyone and it was helping Shinsou so where was the harm 
You didn’t go out of your way to appear as a couple but you were friendly and people were prone to misinterpretation 
Shinsou certainly wasn’t a social butterfly but he certainly wasn’t seen as scary and his friend group grew
2 months into your “relationship” Shinsou had a girl confess to him she liked him 
He was taken aback she hadn’t talked to him the entirety of last term and suddenly she liked him
She had been scared of him unlike you. Unlike you, something clicked for Shinsou and the rest of the week he found himself comparing other girls to you and realized he may truly be in love with you 
By the time he came round to that realization you had made your own. Maybe people had thought you two were a couple bc you hung out with him more, hugged him more, smiled at him more, and liked him more and differently than your other friends. You  maybe even loved him 
At lunch he was the one who reached out and touched you, lightly settling his hand on yours and asking if you wanted to be more than a rumor 
Todoroki
Can we say emotional trauma 
In literature class there’d been a project to perform a Kyogen as a part of their classic lit unit - you’d loved it even if you’d been graded more on the accompanying essay of the evolution of language and classism than the performance part 
When you saw there was a school play you hasn’t hesitated to audition bc the kyogen performance had been so fun
You hadn’t gotten the lead role you wanted but you were more than fine playing a the female lead’s best friend who got swept off her feet by the quiet tortured poet
As soon as you saw who you’d been cast as you immediately checked who your love interest was. It was none other than Shoto Todoroki
You were really nervous the first rehearsal that focused on your sections
You knew Todoroki only by reputation, as a aloof and focused student 
You had no clue what he was doing in the play so you asked. He didn’t tell you the first day instead just did a read through 
The entire time the drama teacher kept saying “More Emotion” and “You’re in love so SMILE” you were pretty sure it was directed at Todoroki who was barely beyond monotone
The director requested Todoroki stay after rehearsal for extra practice. As his scene partner you stayed too
During on of these he explained during the kyogen project he’d felt different in his everyday life when he was pretending to be happy or angry compared to when he tried to show no emotion 
The director had called that moment a breakthrough. You smiled at him and asked whatever made him think that showing no emotion was in any way a good idea. He didn’t answer you 
You made it your mission from then on to get him to show emotion. Of course that was the director’s job on stage. You made it your mission everyday though. 
You would have friends pass him notes for you in between classes, eat lunch with him, and had a bad joke of the day hoping to catch him roll his eyes rather than just stare ahead eating robotically 
Eventually he started to show cracks in the armour, he would smile when you made funny faces backstage, or say he was upset which wasn’t much but baby steps
There were days he reverted to mono-emotionalism (that emotion being bored) on those days you eventually decided your best course was just to annoy him to death or even better till he said he was annoyed this came in the form of you lightly hitting you arm on his head, singing the 100 digits of pi song on loop, or running and jumping at him (he would always catch you knowing his choices were that or be bowled over) 
Those days became fewer and further between as you got closer to the play. There was one particular bad day though. You’d been trying all day to get a reaction, good or bad, out of him with nothing working. 
He was sitting on the floor during practice. You dropped beside him and leaned back till your head was in his lap and started asking “What’s up with you?”
You didn’t finish your question bc he shoved you out of his lap and stormed off 
Your scenes that day weren’t great to say the least 
By the end of practice you were just drained, you really were trying to help, and instead you’d hurt him and that hurt as much as him pushing you away and saying he didn’t need you 
The next day you had Deku hand him a note saying you were sorry 
You didn’t try to reach out to him the rest of the day, sat with your own friends at lunch, and didn’t bother him between scenes during practice
It was a week before you two spoke and that was only on the blocking of the last scene the leads ran to each other as you two cheered and hugged 
Tech week was hell week for 2 reasons 1. The general tiredness and overwhelmingness that always come with tech and 2 you were practically glued to Todoroki’s hip the entire play for 3 run throughs a day and you still weren’t really speaking 
Opening night you saw Todoroki pacing half an hour before curtain call. You were headed back to the dressing room to help some of the other girls with their makeup but he looked stressed. 
You waved not wanting to startle him. He looked up from his pacing feet and just stared at you 
“I’m not here to annoy you. You just look stressed and I wanted to say it’ll be fine and um break a leg. Anyway I’ll leave you to your pacing.” You said before starting to leave
He doesn’t move to stop you from leaving but he stares you down and starts talking, spewing all the feelings that have been building up (that he doesn’t understand) He’s nervous around you. Why is he nervous around you? He’s mad at himself for making you sad that day. You didn’t talk to him. He didn’t know what to do so he let you not talk to him. His miserable and he misses you he thinks. He tried talking to Deku but Deku just told him that he needed to talk to you about these feelings so he didn’t say anything more to Deku. He has all these feeling and doesn’t know why? 
You walk towards him and ask if it’s okay to hug him
He gives the smallest nod
You wrap him in the tightest hug you possibly can and lean your head into his chest. He eventually rests his head on top of yours and awkwardly wraps his hands around your back
When you pull away he looks at you for a moment before telling you your makeup looks nice 
You have to run to help the girls with their makeup you remember but make him promise to talk after the show 
You two talk and by the final curtain call your on stage hug has somehow become a chaste peck on the cheek. 
He pays for your post set strike theater crew Denny’s meal with Endeavour's stolen credit card and asks if it counts as a date if there are 20 other people with you
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malfoysmaybank · 4 years ago
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drivers license - stanley barber
a/n: i was having some writers block on my requests and i’ve been sobbing to this song on repeat, so here’s a fic for my bebs stanley barber. i also changed one lyric from “blonde girl” to “one girl” because it fit the plot more!
warnings: angst, you might cry (i did while writing this lols), parent absence, fluff at the end because i couldn’t break my heart with this one, but some straight angst is coming soon!!!!
word count: 1.7k+
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You had been best friends with Stanley Barber since you were young, maybe 10. You had stood up for him when some kids were pushing him around because of his outfit. 
“Hey! Get off of him!” You said, yelling at the trio of 5th grade boys pushing another boy to the ground. “Or what, Y/N? You’ll tattle? We aren’t scared of a girl.” The leader of the pack said. You clenched your jaw and punched him straight in the nose. You weren’t going to let a man talk to you like that. The leader started crying and ran off, his sidekicks following after him. You walked over to the boy on the ground and helped him up. “T-Thanks for that.” He said as he got back up. “No problem. I’m Y/N, by the way. Y/N Y/L/N.” You extended your hand for a handshake. He took it. “Stanley. Stanley Barber.”
You’ve been close ever since. You ate lunch with him that day and  bonded over silly things like tv shows and favorite colors. In middle school, he helped you develop your style and you bonded over new things like favorite bands and books. You had his back and he had yours. He truly was your best friend.
However, you started seeing Stanley in a new light in eighth grade. He had gotten taller, his face a little more structured. He also learned how to play guitar that year. He wrote a song about you, of all things. Nobody had ever done something like that for you before. You started noticing the little things he did for you. He would randomly bring a bag of your favorite candy to lunch if he saw you were having a bad day. He taught you how to play piano because he thought it sounded nice with your voice. You fell in love with Stanley Barber. Fuck. Of course you’d NEVER tell him. You couldn’t fuck up the only good thing in your life right now. So that meant silently suffering whenever he had a crush on someone.
That’s the issue, you couldn’t be happy for him when he was with someone else. You spent countless days crying alone in your room after he’d go on for hours about his newest crush. This continued for a straight 3 years. His newest crush was Sydney Novak. You thought this one would blow over, just like his past few, but it didn’t. In fact, this one was the strongest crush he’s ever had. He’d been ditching you to hang out with her. He wasn’t even there to see you get your drivers license, something he’d been so encouraging about. He basically taught you how to drive because he knew how much it meant to you. He didn’t even know you had passed your test, never once asking. But in the sparse moments when he didn’t blow off plans, he’d constantly be talking about her. One of those sparse moments being tonight.
You were currently in his room/basement and he was going on one of his Sydney rants. “She’s so cool, Y/N. I mean, I’ve never met someone who I’ve clicked with more.” Um ouch, but whatever. “I don’t know, she’s just different. Like, in a good way though.” Three deep breaths, Y/N. 3… “We even hooked up the other night.” 2… “I think I’m in love with her.” 1. “Look Stanley, not to be rude, but do you EVER shut up about her?!” You spat. He looked over at you in shock. “I can’t do this tonight… I’m leaving.” You grab your ‘save the earth’ backpack and start jogging up the stairs to leave. 
He follows as you open the door to his garage. “Woah, woah, woah, Y/N. What’s up?” Stan calls from behind you. You grab your skateboard and lift up the garage door. It’s pouring outside, but you don’t care. You go to leave but feel a hand on your wrist stop you. “You’re not going out in weather like that, just come inside and we can talk.” He says gently, still slightly confused. “About what, Sydney again? Don’t you get it Stanley?!” You snap in his face. His eyebrows furrow and you let out a sarcastic laugh, tears building in your eyes. “Of course you don’t. You’ve been so wrapped up in Sydney that you forgot who I was! I’m so done, Stan. I can’t sit here and pretend that I don’t care anymore. Don’t bother hanging out with me anymore.” You snap and rip your wrist away from Stanley’s grip. 
You drop your board and get on, pushing as fast as you can. He calls after you but you block him out. When you’re a far distance away from him and his house, you just sit down on the side of the road and cry. Hurt that he’ll never be yours. Angry that he doesn’t care about you anymore. Frustrated because you tried to be the glue that held your friendship together, but even glue can’t fix the titanic.
You didn’t go to school for the next week. Your parents wouldn’t care, they weren’t even here. Still on some ‘business trip’ just like every week. Instead, you did something that calms you. Wrote music about how you were feeling. You played piano basically all week. Singing anything and everything you were feeling. It made you feel worse sometimes, but in the end it felt worth it.
Stan pulled into your driveway in his dad’s piece of shit car. He needed to work this out with you, he hadn’t seen you all week and he was worried. He missed his best friend. As he quietly closed the car door, he heard the piano playing. He didn’t recognize the song, he was curious. He didn’t even bother knocking, knowing you would slam the door in his face if you knew it was him. He quietly shut the front door and he heard your voice. It got louder as he walked closer to your bedroom door. He’d always loved your voice, it put him to sleep some nights. He could see you slightly, the door left ajar. He listened in.
“I got my drivers license last week,
Just like we always talked about.
'Cause you were so excited for me
To finally drive up to your house.
But today I drove through the suburbs,
Crying 'cause you weren't around”
You sang flawlessly, not a single note out of tune. There was so much emotion behind your voice. So much hurt, anger, frustration. He continued listening, trying to find out who caused you so much hurt. He’d bash their face in, that’s for sure.
“And you're probably with that one girl
Who always made me doubt.
She's so much older than me,
She's everything I'm insecure about”
With that first line, it hit him. He’d caused this hurt. The anger, the frustration, that was him. He was so angry with himself that he almost missed the next line… almost.
“Yeah, today I drove through the suburbs,
'Cause how could I ever love someone else?”
You… you loved him? He’d spent so much time on Sydney that he hadn’t even realized what was in front of him all these years. Except he had.
“And I know we weren't perfect, but I've never felt this way for no one.
And I just can't imagine how you could be so okay now that I'm gone.”
God damn it! He could’ve confessed sooner, instead of ignoring his feelings. And for what? A mindless hookup with Sydney?! He could’ve had you this whole time, but he fucked up.
“....Guess you didn't mean what you wrote in that song about me.”
You said that line softly. No anger, or frustration, or even confusion behind that line. Just hurt. He saw a single tear fall down your cheek as you stopped singing. There was more to that song, you just couldn’t continue. He’d be sure to ask you to sing the rest of it later, but right now he needed to fix this. You stood up from the piano bench and he burst through the door. “Stanley, what are you doi-” You couldn’t even finish your sentence before he wrapped his arms around you and brought your head to his chest. “I meant every word of that damn song. Every word. I’m so sorry, Y/N. I’m so sorry.” Tears flowed down your face as you tightly hugged him back and buried your face in the crook of his neck. “I love you. And I’ll be better for you. I should’ve treated you with the respect and love you deserve. I swear I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to make it up to you. Please give me a second chance, please.” He cried. “I love you too, Stan.” You started. “But I don’t know.” He squeezed you tighter (but still as gentle as possible, he didn’t want to hurt you), with more tears flowing out of his eyes. “Please, Y/N. I’ll be better. If I give you anything less than the love and attention you deserve, you have my full permission to punch me square in the face and kick me to the curb.” You both giggled, still crying. 
He let go of you to hold your face in his hands. “Please?” He begged. “...Okay, fine. But we need to go over how you’re going to do better in the future and what we can do to help each other communicate better and stuff.” You said. He picked you up and spun you around, making you squeal. “Thank you, thank you, thank you, Y/N!! I promise I’ll make it up to you, I promise.” You laughed as he set you down and leant down to whisper in your ear. “Want to hear a secret?” He said, sending shivers down your spine. “I never liked Sydney.” He laughed as you hit his chest. “You dick!” You exclaimed, shocked. He swiftly pulled you in by the waist, your faces inches apart as your hands rested on his chest. “You love me, though.” He whispered. “That I do.” You said and finally closed the gap. Damn, you could kiss this boy forever. Alas, the moment is cut short because unfortunately, humans need oxygen to survive. “I love you too.” He says and smiles, giving you a peck on the forehead. “Could you sing the rest of that song for me? I love your voice but that songwriting was INCREDIBLE.” He says and you nod.
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permanent taglist: 
@loonylunaandthenargles​
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jimlingss · 4 years ago
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It's B from @bang-tan-bitches and I would like to request a yandere fic. It can be BTS OT7 x reader or BTS member of your choice x reader. Similar to your amazing isekai story i would like something similar(a long one shot or a multi-chapter, your choice). Whether YN transmigrates to a game or a novel (not as a villain but maybe as a cannon fodder side character that has little importance to the story and just wants to lay low) but YN captures the attention of the love interest(s) and shit starts getting weird, intense, uncomfortable. Maybe it causes the supposed female lead to turn into the villain, maybe it causes the love interest(s) to turn into the villain(s). Maybe YN realizes that something is wrong with the story/game but can't figure it out. Idk. Time period doesn't matter. Modern. Ancient. Fairytale. Fantasy. Whatever.
If you can do this great! If you can't or don't want to, that's okay too. You're an amazing writer with so much talent and I'm really appreciative of all your work. Thank you for taking requests from your fans, I'm sure you've received a lot.
Take care! 😘💜💜💜
at the start of the pandemic, I was getting back into manga and manhwa and then after a few months, I dawdled off but recently, I’ve been getting back into it again haha so this request came at a pretty good time. Hopefully you won’t mind that I’ve taken some creative liberties with this request lol I think it’s more fun if I keep readers on their toes, including the requester.
On another note, I really shouldn’t be writing all my isekai’s with Taehyung as the main lead but he’s just so fitting asdfghjkl
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↳ The Fox Bride
2.6k || 99% Light Fluff, 1% Angst || Kim Taehyung || Isekai!AU, Slight Yandere!AU, Nine-Tailed Fox!Taehyung
You are a tutorial character.
But you weren’t always. You still remember being a career woman in the twenty-first century, struggling with overtime and paying bills while trying to keep yourself fed. The success of that ranged from month to month. But more importantly, you still remember that night too.
It was rainy. Your car blew a flat tire. You pulled to the side of the highway and got out.
The last thing that registered was the deafening honk of the semi-truck. 
Then you felt yourself flying upwards.
But when you landed, instead of colliding with the concrete and dying upon impact, you fell back onto your ass in the middle of a market on a dirt road. Transported back a thousand years ago.
Your purpose was fulfilled in the next two minutes. 
“Are you alright?”
The male protagonist had stretched out his hand and helped you up. The hero. The main character. It was obvious with his bright red hair, shining eyes and bronze armour. He was so starkly different from the rest who were gray and drab, including you who was suddenly in a brown shapeless dress. He was practically a neon billboard in the middle of a graveyard.
“Are you Y/N?”
You looked at him, befuddled that he knew your name. But before you could even respond or provide a line of dialogue, he said, “This is a delivery from Baker Jeon. He gives you his thanks.”
The protagonists handed you a loaf of bread. Undoubtedly his first ever quest. 
You looked down, not sure what to do with it.
“Do you know where the blacksmith is?”
You had absolutely no clue. But there was the deafening noise of hammering steel literally ten steps away. You would have to be blind not to see the gruff man shaping a sword at an anvil right on the road and deaf not to hear it. As if that wasn’t enough, the literal sign of the shop read: ‘the blacksmith’.
So you pointed.
“Thanks.” And he trudged off.
You were utterly confused until a background character who said they knew you waved you over. You shared your bread with her, brushed aside when she asked you what was wrong, and you followed her as she walked up to your supposed cottage.
All the while, you saw yourself in the background of the hero’s main quest as he ran through the town.
And that was that.
It wasn’t so hard to figure out where you were or what the hell this was when you put your mind to it. Without much of a job or a family, and no technology but the candle that you had to conserve when night fell, there was ample time.
So you spent it thinking and you eventually solved the mystery.
You were in Beast Boys Harem: A Forbidden Embrace. AKA. a dumb yaoi otome game app that you downloaded on your phone when you were sixteen and bored. You remember because you were too cheap to buy the routes, so you played the tutorial, prologue and read the summaries of the routes online. Now you regret that you didn’t just fork over the goddamn five dollars. 
Even more than that, you regret that you even downloaded the game in the first place.
But at least you’re just a tutorial character. You’re free from the storyline and the plot—
That’s what you thought.
Turns out living a thousand years in the past in a fantasy realm as a woman didn’t bode well. It was probably no different from how it would’ve been like in the medieval ages. You had no trade skills. No one was willing to accept you as an apprentice when you were a woman. You found that you were essentially illiterate with a reading level of a preschooler, no one was willing to teach you, and you had no power or wealth when you were without a father or a husband.
And you’re certain what the landlord and tax-collectors are doing is illegal.
But in this world, in this unjust realm, there is no such thing as the law.
“We know you’re in there!”
You jolt from the heavy pounding on the frail wooden door.
“It’s time to pay up!”
Your hands tremble as you set the candle down that’s still billowing of smoke, the flame smothered out mere seconds ago. As much as you want to hide and pull the blanket over your head, you know that door won’t last. They’ll find you if you’re trapped in here.
“If you can’t, spread those legs of yours!” a low voice spits and there’s chortling from the men.
Someone adds, “Sell your body already!” 
“Open up! Damn whore!”
Without a single possession but the white nightgown clad on your body, you open the latch of the back window. You cringe at the squeak, trying to keep your movements quiet before the door gives way.
You hoist yourself up onto the window ledge. The door bends with the strength of multiple clenched fists against it. Your feet touch the soft grass outside your cottage. The men shout.
And the door finally slams against the wall, hinges broken. 
But by then, you’ve slipped into the shadows.
“Where is she?!”
The blanket is ripped off the bed, curtains are whipped back, every drawer dumped onto the ground and cupboards yanked open. The floor shakes with the weight of their boots and you press your palm to your mouth to silence your panting breaths, slowly stepping away.
“That damn whore slipped through us—!”
But as your shitty luck would have it, a sudden crack has the whole world coming to a standstill.
Shit. You look down at your feet, realizing that the snapping noise came from you stepping on a twig. And it’s exposed your hiding place.
“There she is!” — “Out the back window!”
You grab fistfuls of your dress and bolt. 
“Get her!”
With your cottage on the edge of town, there’s nowhere to run but through the dense woods. It’s shrouded in the darkness, no doubt filled with wild beasts creeping through the thicket. The rustling canopy of the trees doesn’t allow the dim, waning moonlight to illuminate your path.
So you’re left blind. Struggling up the high incline of the forest, feet slipping on dirt and mud. But you keep sprinting with all your might, even when the pointed, coiling branches scrape at your calves until blood sheds and the hem of your dress tears in the underbrush.
“Run, little rabbit!” one of them mocks, “Run!”
The four men continue to give chase, gripping onto their roaring torches, shrieking and howling after you. One of them is manically laughing as if your efforts to flee only adds to the thrill. Their greased hands reach out to snatch you, but the tips of their fingers graze the ends of your hair.
Your teeth are sunk into the bottom of your lip, sobs breaking through your aching chest. Your lungs burn, dying for a break or moment of relief. But you don’t relent and luckily, you manage to build distance between you and the men. Only, that luck comes crashing down by a fucking hole.
A hole in the forest floor that you don’t see. That has your footing all wrong. That makes you scream and fall.
You twist your ankle in a direction it’s definitely not supposed to be in and cry from pain. 
A second later, you force yourself to get up and keep running with tears flooding your eyes and dripping down your cheeks. But it’s more like limping than running, akin to hobbling on one leg and every movement has pain shooting from your swelling ankle.
The effort becomes futile. They surround you within minutes.
“All finished?” The tax-collector’s head cocks with a spreading grin. “You’re not going to keep running?”
Why couldn’t you just fucking die the first time?! Even if it was an awful death where you didn’t have time to prepare yourself or say goodbye to anyone, at least it would’ve been the end. At least you wouldn’t have to suffer.
But there’s no time to grieve. Or hate the new life you’ve been given. This is it. You have to keep going. You have to survive. By any means. You’re about to pick up a branch and uselessly wave it around at them, shout at them to stand back. Anything that you could do to save yourself—
“Who dares come onto my mountain?!”
There’s a deep timbre behind you. A husky voice that quivers the very core of the forest.
As if the wind has swept through, the trees and thicket rustle and it goes silent.
The men fall back onto their asses, some torches clattering to the ground. Their eyes have grown double in size, nearly falling from their sockets and their jaws have dropped to the dirt.
“I-It’s the nine-tailed fox!”
The man scrambles back.
“Demon!” 
Another barely manages to get onto his feet. He turns around and lurches away while shrieking.
They all run. Scattering away as frantically as cockroaches when the light is flickered on.
From your spot on the ground, you turn around with wide eyes. 
Amber irises meet your gawking and they practically glow in the darkness of the forest. He is dressed in a loose, white robe that’s draped over his frame, open to the middle of his chest. And over his honey hair, on the top of his head, his pointed golden ears twitch. By the torch fire still yet to die out, he is illuminated and his shadow is casted on the ground. The blazing flame warms his cold, sharp features. 
He is the most beautiful person you’ve ever seen. In both worlds you’ve lived in.
And you know who he is.
Taehyung. One of the love interests of the hero. A seductive, sly creature that eventually coaxes the hero into selling him his soul to grant one of his wishes. But Taehyung grows to become an obsessed character that wants to do nothing but monopolize and possess the hero for himself.
That same Taehyung approaches you with his lip curled as you teeter to your feet.
“Run away, girl.” He leans close. “Before I eat you.”
“Stop!” 
On sheer instinct and adrenaline, you push him back. Your palm shoves against his firm chest.
Taehyung stumbles back with his eyes becoming rounded. He looks down to where you had made contact against his body. “Did...you just touch me?”
“What?”
Taehyung’s head darts upwards and he captures your wrist in his hand, squeezing tightly. He tugs you in and on your swollen ankle, you stumble into him. Bodies flush against one another. Your face pressed to his warm chest. His arm coming around your waist to break your fall.
He is aghast. 
“You’re not from this world.” Taehyung’s yellow eyes swirl as they gaze into you. “Where did you come from?”
It’s been three days.
“Wed me,” he begs for the seventy sixth time. 
You don’t know why you’re keeping a count.
“No.”
You’re hugging your knees for warmth. The rice paper-paneled doors are slid open and letting in the chilly air. He doesn’t seem to be affected by the cold, but you don’t look at him for long. 
You turn into the corner of his home while sitting on the tatami floors as if you’re putting yourself into time out. But you’d like to say it’s your privacy corner. It’s as private as this abode, which was basically one room, could get. 
Taehyung sighs in frustration, placing his hand on his forehead. His teeth grit. “You’re only making this harder for yourself.” Your silence angers him more. “You can never leave.”
You turn over your shoulder to glare. “Even if I married you, you’d never let me leave anyway.”
Taehyung narrows his eyes on you and then smirks. “You’re right. Wed or unwed, I won’t let you out of my sight. You should feel grateful, girl. You’re the best human I’ve ever treated.”
You quietly scoff.
Maybe you should feel scared. Maybe you should tread more lightly. After all, he’s not a character to be trifled with.
But you know he needs you. That alone gives you power. 
As a beast, Taehyung’s been trapped on this mountain by priests for centuries. The only way he can be free is by feeding off of sexual energy and breaking the barrier. But of course, they also cursed him to be unable to touch any woman in this universe. 
You aren’t from this universe.
You jolt when you realize that while you were lost in thought, Taehyung’s crawled closer. He has a foxy smile, amber eyes searching your expression. “Maybe….maybe I’ll grant you a bit of freedom if you would just give into the temptation and let me have a taste of you.”
As cold as he looks, he is beautiful. He is mischievous when he smirks and sly when he speaks. You are utterly spellbound as you look into his irises. And the temptation he speaks of flickers in the warmth of your belly.
But you turn away.
“I already said we only do that kind of thing after marriage. And I will only marry someone I love.”
Taehyung draws back with an unamused scoff. “What a prudish world you’re from.”
He wanted you the moment you were brought to this house. With the intensity of his stare and your captivated state, you had let him pin you to his floor and you liked it. But then clarity came and you blurted that such an act only happens after marriage. A lie just to buy time.
You didn’t expect for the hero to arrive at Taehyung’s house the next day. With his red hair and bronze armour, he had gotten lost in the forest and knocked on the door. Before you could limp over and answer it, Taehyung jumped off the roof and confronted him.
The guy was thrown off the mountain within five minutes.
It wasn’t supposed to be like this. They were supposed to have a steamy rendezvous. Taehyung was supposed to get the sexual energy from him! 
The story was going off the rails. And you’re not sure what you’re even buying time for anymore.
The both of you know it’s only a matter of time before you break and succumb to his mesmerizing seduction.
Taehyung is cruel, ruthless, obsessive.
But what’s the most bewitching thing about him is the jarring contrast of when he’s clumsy and nurturing. It’s what he regards as his own weakness. What he hides from others. But you felt your heart waver two nights ago when you were shaken awake in the middle of twilight. When you peeked open your eye to see him gingerly wrapping your swollen ankle with bandages.
He looked beautiful in the pale moonlight, ears, tails, sharp features softened—
“Ow!” You wince as he squeezes your ankle, right on your injury.
“You think too much in your head,” he says and looks at you. “What’s wrong?”
“It hurts.”
A sadistic smile tugs on Taehyung’s lips. He lets go, but only to lift your chin with his fingers. His plush lips are inches away, his breath warm on your skin and he gazes deep into you. “I won’t let you return to your world. I won’t let you run away. I won’t let anyone harm you.”
“You’re mine now.” Taehyung swears, “You’ll fall in love with me eventually.”
You gulp and he smirks.
The two of you know it’s only a matter of time.
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jpegjade · 4 years ago
Text
Writer’s Block - Spencer
IT HAS BEEN A LIL BIT SINCE I ACTUALLY COMPLETED SOMETHING. literally i’m jumping from job to job. i barely found time to write this lmao. 
this is for the lovely anon who requested this: can we have a fic where the reader has writer’s block and spencer is helpful? 
here you go anon, HELPFUL SPENCER 
warnings: all fluff and a lil bit of a reference talking about weight but it’s all fluff and nothing seriously deep. 
_____________
“Ugh.” You yelled, throwing your hands in the air. “This is pointless.” 
Spencer was sitting at his desk when he looked up to see you having a partial meltdown on your shared apartment couch. 
“Please tell me why I decided to do this. I can’t think of a single reason why anyone would go through this torture willingly.” You groaned to Spencer, who just smiled in response. 
You were glad he found this so amusing because you surely didn’t think any of it was cute in the slightest. 
“You’ve got a psychological inability to produce a substantial amount of content to satisfy your drive to create.” Spencer continued smiling at you. 
“Cliff Notes version, please. I’m mentally spent.” You said, looking over at him. 
“Writer’s block.” He said, as if he couldn’t just say that in the beginning. 
“At the worst time possible.” You said, groaning again. 
As an author, you were used to the words coming to you easily. There were so many ways to describe a single feeling that you just knew how to craft the language most of the time. It’s one of the many things that made Spencer fall in love with you: You crafted a world of your own through imagination and you were able to pull other people in to experience it with you. It was something special about you that set you apart from so many other writers in your genre. 
Getting up from his chair, Spencer walked over to your spot on the couch to sit next to you. He put his arm around your shoulders, pulling you into him. 
“How far have you gotten on your story?” Spencer said, leaning over to see your laptop screen. You turned it away from him so he couldn’t see anything. 
“Baby, you know I don’t like you to see my works in progress. I only want you to see things when they’re complete.” You said. 
“Baby, I want to see every stage of your creativity no matter how rough.” Spencer smiled. “Maybe I can offer some advice and corrections.” 
“I don’t want you to see everything bc plot holes and such. And I don’t want you to know the plot until it’s complete.” You closed your computer screen so he couldn’t see anything. 
You turned to stare at him as he pulled his arm back, leaving on the back of the couch. The two of you stared at each other, both holding your own secrets. 
Your secret was that you secured a book deal for a Young Adult book. While the signatures were still needed for paycheck negotiations to close, you were holding out on telling Spencer until your manager confirmed everything was official. The call could come at any minute so you were checking your phone every few minutes. You weren’t superstitious but you didn’t want to tell Spencer something before it was completely confirmed. You didn’t want to get your hopes up but more importantly, you didn’t want to disappoint Spencer. He was so proud of you for your constant writing and he loved to read your stories after you sent them to your editor for content when your story was chosen for different magazines, contests, and blogs. If you secure this book deal, it will be huge for you and Spencer, making your dream come true. 
Spencer’s secret was that he was off for a month. He just got back from a case that lasted 3 weeks and before that, he was gone for the larger part of 2 months. There were a lot of back to back cases that ran right behind each other. The two of you made a sarcastic joke that it was serial killer season because it was like clockwork that these cases would come in. It was sad that so many people were hurt and killed in the process but there were countless lives saved by the team and their constant, tiring work. They needed some time off, especially with the last case draining them so greatly. 
“I won’t push you but just know, I’m excited about everything you do. I’m so proud of you for being so persistent in everything. You know, the word persistent is a great word to describe you because it’s more than just the determination to accomplish a task, although many people use it in conjunction with the word. Based on the definition by the Miriam-Webster dictionary, the word persistent means to exist for a long or longer than usual time continuously. You’ve been determined to continue your writing but it’s more than that. You’ve evolved from only writing for whoever will read your work to writing for yourself. You connect with...” Spencer wanted to go on before he noticed your phone vibrating. 
“Hold on, Spence. I’m so sorry.” You said, pulling out your phone. 
It was a text message from your agent. 
“Closed and complete. Sealed the deal. Mucho bueno mi amor.” Your agent followed that text with celebration emojis and you couldn’t look away. By calling you her love, your agent meant nothing by it any more than you called your friends your girlfriends. Your agent knew you well so she was very friendly. 
Your heart was beating a mile a minute, your breathing strained. You didn’t know whether you wanted to laugh or cry, or both at the same time. It was real. It was really real. It was entirely real. A tear ended up slipping through the floodgates, quickly followed by another. Spencer immediately saw the shift in your body language before you were able to hide it. 
“What’s wrong?” Spencer said, worry crossing his face. He didn’t understand how such a happy moment could go south so quickly. 
“It’s not you.” You said, trying to hold back the fact that you were ready to start sobbing. You wiped the tears away and put your hands back in your lap. Fresh tears were right behind those and you weren’t going to stop them this time. You hung your head, chin barely touching your chest, watching the tears fall on your hands. 
“What is it? You can tell me, lovely.” Spencer grabbed your hands from resting in your lap. His thumb immediately began gently rubbing your hands, which only made you cry harder. 
Readjusting how he sat so he could pull you into his lap, Spencer was so confused and so hurt because he didn’t know how to fix it. He couldn’t fix it when he didn’t know what was wrong. He just wanted you to be okay and you seemed far from it. You fought him a little bit. 
“I’m going to flatten you.” You said, finally calming down. 
“Then I will be the happiest flat man alive. You won’t flatten me, lovely. You’ll put your cute butt in my lap, swing your arms around my shoulders, and hang onto me for dear life as you let go of whatever just happened. You don’t have to feel alone if you’re sad.” Spencer said. 
You got up, sat on the couch next to him, and put your legs over his. It was much more comfortable that way and made you less self-conscious. He was staring at you with his puppy eyes and it melted your heart all over again. 
“I have something to tell you.” You said, taking a deep breath. 
“Okay…” Spencer looked concerned, stoic even. He was even a little bit scared. 
“I’ve been hiding something from you and I feel so bad about it.” Tears sprang to your eyes again. 
“Lovie, whatever it is, we can work through it. There are very few things in this world you can tell me that I would be upset about. I”ve seen the worst of the worst. Working out a minor bump won’t break me.” Spencer slightly smiled. 
“No, no. It’s not bad. I promise it’s not.” You let out a sigh you didn’t know you were holding. “I got a book deal.” 
Spencer was silent for a second before he broke out in the biggest smile you had seen from him in a while. He obviously didn’t have a problem being happy as his emotion. Joy overcame him and he gently put your legs on the ground and stood up just to kneel in front of you to cover you in kisses. He kissed every major part of your face before kissing you. A slow, gentle kiss but it still took your breath away. 
“You know you’re amazing, right? You deserve this out of anyone.” Spencer held your face gently in his hands, his thumb slowly rubbing your cheek.  
“I’m stuck, Spence. How am I supposed to finish the book when I can’t even finish the short story I’m writing.” You couldn’t meet his eyes. 
“Maybe I can help. What’s it about?” Spencer stood up, sitting back on the couch next to you. 
“It’s the story of this brilliant teacher who moonlights as a spy. Not the most original idea but it’s not supposed to be original. It’s just a short story that someone requested on my blog.” You grabbed your computer and put it back on your lap. 
“So you’re writing about me.” Spencer smiled. 
“You’re not a spy. You moonlight as a teacher.” You said, opening your computer. You couldn’t bear to look at Spencer’s face right now as he thought about how you were basically writing about him. 
You always took character inspiration from him. He was such a big part of your life that all of your writing had hints of Spencer in them, no matter how hard you tried to leave him out of things. So it was a big deal for him to even figure out that he was largely related to this story. 
“What if…” Spencer started, “You wrote about his dashing butt?” Spencer said, beaming at you. 
You choked on your spit. 
“What?” You said, in between coughs.
“His fabulous behind in pants. You’re always telling me how amazing I look in my black slacks. So why not write about that for fun? I’m sure your blog readers would be quite amused.” Spencer was so hilariously serious that you couldn’t stop laughing. 
“Okay, fine. You win. I will put in something about your butt.” You said, turning your computer on. 
“And insert something about his beautifully flowing hair.” Spencer said. 
“Baby, your hair is short right now.” You said. He allowed you to cut his hair a few days ago and he missed his longer hair but he really liked when you gave him haircuts. 
“I know but if he’s a badass super spy and a teacher, he needs to have versatile looks.” Spencer ran his hand through his hair, a new habit he started when you cut his hair. 
“Baby, you’re going to overwhelm me with ideas.” You said, chuckling. You felt a little better about the writer’s block and the book deal the more Spencer made you laugh. 
“Good. Maybe we should go on a walk and figure out more ideas. Exercise is good for ideas because your blood flow to your brain is increased. You also get mental clarity. Over the next 6 weeks, we can do that more.” Spencer quickly walked to the door to grab both of your running shoes. 
Sitting down next to you, what he said finally hit you. 
“Next six weeks?” You asked, putting your computer on the coffee table. 
You didn’t care that all you were wearing were some cozy shorts and an old t-shirt that was way too big for you. 
“Oh, I didn’t tell you.” Spencer got his right shoe on after a little bit of struggle. “I’m off for 6 weeks after the last case. We all need the break…” He said, his eyes going to a dark place for a moment. You gently touched his arm and came back to life, in the moment with you. 
“So… You can help me?” Your mood got significantly better as you realized he was all yours for 6 weeks. 
“Every step of the way, y/n.” Spencer said, popping up from the couch in his shoes, ready to go.
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fenristheorem · 4 years ago
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Hello~! You mentioned in your "Lance with a very motherly s/o" post that you have a headcanon for how Lance discovered the Guard was hunting down dragons. Could you please share it? 😃
Thank you so much for asking this, I'd love to share! I have a whole back story on Lance starting from the village and theorizing that his mentioned neck injury came from the same time he faked his death, but that'll take a whole different post since it’s very long. Just ask if you'd like me to write the whole back story!
Since Beemoov explains basically nothing, I took it upon myself to create actual timelines and how things related to each other (because I'm the person that needs a background on characters). A lot of my beginning headcanons are background information to set up the scene, and since what Beemoov said throughout Origins doesn't contradict any of it, it's canon for me lol.
Information to understand beforehand:
There's a few main points to make first that defend the fact that this could be a plausible back story for Lance (because I like to theorize backstories when it doesn’t contradict what’s canon)
So Beemoov never clarified what was meant by 'survivors', so I can only imagine that both dragons and angels/demons were hunted down (even though it was also said that there were no survivors or texts of the sacrifice, but I think that was before the writers changed the plot - they changed the plot at some point if I recall correctly, right?- Regardless, since episode 26 shows it's an important part of Lance's reasoning, my headcanon follows the belief that survivors were hunted)
Since they were hunted, and Eldarya has always been a bit unstable/uninhabitable, and the guard continuously tries to fix this issue, I can only assume that after the survivors were hunted they were then sacrificed to the crystal - but not willingly, and I imagine these unwilling sacrifices to be quite bloody
A major point to understand is that the Blue Sacrifice, and then Guardienne and Leiftan's sacrifice, were both willing, and they worked
I like to assume that forced sacrifices wouldn't work because it's not willing
But the guard didn't acknowledge this possibility, they just keep trying and trying with the forced sacrifices, hoping that one day it'll make an improvement
They were desperate; they didn't know what else to do
Since we don't get much of a storyline of when Miiko took over the guard in relation to Lance becoming Chief of Obsidian, I like to think that he originally joined (and became Chief) when Yonuki Kaze (the leader before Miiko) was still leader
Allegedly, Yonuki wasn't a very good man and did some terrible things, so it would make sense if he started the hunt for survivors and forced sacrifices. He then taught this to Miiko, and she obeyed and followed his lead (seeing her leadership later on - and at some point I think she does tell Guardienne that she would have sacrificed her if her heritage was revealed sooner - makes me believe that she may have originally been included in this)
I like to think that when Lance joined the guard, he didn't know about any of this. He kept his focus, trained hard to be a good warrior, followed orders and wasn't afraid to give orders. He and the rest of the guard had no idea about the hunting of survivors
If the rest of the guard encouraged the hunting and forced sacrificing, Lance would have heard of it quickly and would most likely have left the guard then instead of later, so I imagine the only people who know about the sacrifices was Yonuki and Miiko.
But they still needed the survivors to be hunted down, so they had people track down leads on specific fairies who they thought to be survivors (how could they tell the difference? Don't ask me, I don't know lol. I haven't thought that hard about it). When they found an identity, they would send a few people from the Obsidian guard to track the survivor and bring them back to HQ
As an excuse, Yonuki and Miiko would say that that specific person had valuable information the guard wanted to talk to them about, or that they were in danger from a source they can't specify
As a result, the suspected survivor was tracked down and eventually agreed to go to the guard thinking that they’re now in danger and the guard would protect them. Of course; many were cautious and had their suspicions, but those who were sent by the guard truly believed that they were doing good - and that positivity was usually enough to create a light, convincing atmosphere that would influence the survivor to come with them
However, the travel home wasn't always so... merciful. It's wasn't uncommon for them to be attacked on their way back, and for the suspected survivor to be a target of the attack, exactly like Yonuki and Miiko said they would be...
Once they arrive at the guard, the survivor is seen to immediately. They're treated very kindly, but nobody except Miiko and Yonuki have access to them; not even the Chiefs of Absynthe, Shadow and Obsidian guards. The Light guard isn't allowed access either; only an occasional nurse, the same one for all of them (who wasn't Ewelein because she's too nice for this in my opinion), and the leader of the guard or his apprentice.
However, in time, the guard seems to forget about these prisoners refugees, and if someone asks about them, the guard responds in a very... odd way that dismisses any further questions
How Lance discovered the guard was sacrificing survivors of the Blue Sacrifice:
Now that background information has been established, I believe I can start to explain Lance's role in this
Like I said earlier; he was focused and serious. He impressed his superiors in ways that eventually made him their favorite, and so it wasn't much of a surprise when he was asked to succeed the former Chief of Obsidian
He readily jumped to this; he knew he was the best candidate for the job and he was ready to do anything the guard needed of him to prove this!
Along with other tasks, sometimes he was asked to track and receive certain people who had importance to the guard. He was never told why in specific - as long as the guard said it was for their safety, it made sense to him. So he did as told; traveled with a few of his favorite warriors - which occasionally included his brother if he was available - and convinced this target fairy to return to the guard
Of course, he was aware with some of these target people that they were dragons, like him! The scent gave it all away! Since they never had time alone, though, he never talked to them specifically about any of this, but he was truly convinced then that the guard must have been taking them refuge, like they did with him and Valk. The only difference is that somehow these other dragons have been realized and are probably made to disappear for their own protection; but they must be safe at the guard! Surely since him and Valk hid the truth so well, they were then allowed to stay active - no doubt if they were found out they would meet the same fate of disappearing.
Whenever their target became nervous, Lance always took it upon himself to calm and reassure them. From one dragon to another; the guard is safe and will protect them from others who seek to hunt them.
"It'll be alright, I promise. You're safe now; we won't let anything happen to you"
Of course, getting them home wasn't always easy with occasional attacks seeking their target, but they always fought them off. The target would occasionally be injured, but it wasn't anything that couldn't be treated at the Infirmary
Once home, Lance allowed the leader and a nurse to take care of the target; he had done his job and he didn't need to worry. He carried on as usual, knowing that he helped another survivor of his people to safety. And one day he would make time to talk to them if allowed, even if he needed to say he was just checking in on them...
However, not all of them were dragons, so he made a bit less of an attempt to speak with those fairies - he had far more to say to his people - but he did still try to check in on occasion
Time would pass, no more than a few weeks, and Lance found that, more often than not, when he tried to check in on the survivors they were... inaccessible at the moment. He never really asked why; he's a busy man and he doesn't want to intrude on the nurses and their patients, so he just asks the nurse to request his presence when the target is well enough to speak with him
And eventually, Yonuki passed away, and Miiko took charge. Nothing really changed, she led by Yonuki's example for the most part, but Lance knew she was basically in love with him. He didn't feel the same, but he knew this facet of information could help him one day if he needed his superior to be a bit lenient with him, so he let it be.
Things carried on for a while until it seemed like he, too, forgot about the survivors every now and again. After enough waiting, he tried to ask the nurse their condition again, at least one of them, but apparently many of the files had been lost, and others needed updating - the guard wasn't too organized it seems...
Lance, now a bit irritated, let it be and spent a few days devising an organized system that he thought could be implemented into the Infirmary so less files were lost or held old information. Of course Miiko would at least hear him out; she doesn't like to turn him down immediately. So late at night when everyone was fast asleep, after spending the day finalizing his idea, he heads to her room to talk to her. She doesn't answer her door, so he figures she's spending some late nights in the crystal room.
He heads up the stairway - only to back up a few paces and press his back against the wall as he stares in confusion, and then horror, at the sight in front of him.
Three fairies, heavily bound and unable to move, kneeled before someone. They were kept silent by cloths over their mouths, but their wishes were clear as they stared at the person in front of them with tear-filled eyes and shaking heads, emanating faint muffled cries as they desperately pleaded.
However, the most disturbing part was that Lance recognized these fairies - the three held captive were fairies he had been sent to retrieve, he even recognized one or two as dragons, and Miiko was in front of them with a dagger in her hand, muttering words that couldn't be heard but clearly meant danger.
Lance, in a way, knew something was wrong with the survivors beforehand. It was odd that he wasn't allowed to speak with any, or that all the files on them had been lost or poorly maintained while many others were apparently fine. He had been refusing to see that something was wrong - because he so desperately wanted to believe that the guard was helping his people - and now they were paying for it.
He froze when he saw the scene unfold, his gut twisting horribly and blood running cold as he saw how Miiko enacted the forced sacrifices, and only one thought ran through his mind.
'This is your fault. You could have stopped this. You promised them they were safe and you lied.'
Nobody noticed him the whole time, not as four turned into three, and then two, then one. And Lance could do nothing but watch; frozen from guilt, numbness and fear - because that's what happened to dragons who were recognized by the guard.
Lance backed away, slowly, as quietly as possible. There was no way he was going to talk to Miiko about anything now, he couldn't unsee this, and he knew more than ever that he needed to keep his heritage a secret.
He spends the next few days in a soul-shattering cycle of sickness, guilt and fear. He hides it well, but he doesn't allow himself to be alone. The instant he's alone, he breaks down completely into panic and guilt. He’s more of a wreck than he’s ever been.
He decides to visit the Infirmary again - the nurse must know that her patients are going missing. He nearly pauses in the doorway as he realizes that she may be helping this madness, but carries on, only to be told that the most recent refugees brought in have passed away from health complications... he inquiries about a few more and if the nurse doesn't claim that their files are still lost then she claims they've passed from health complications...
Cold dread flows through him as he comes to realize that many fairies, his own people and possibly angels or demons, must have been sacrificed against their will.
And it's his fault; he brought them here
He decides to confront Miiko about what he saw. It wasn't right and there's no way he was going to just forget it.
It doesn't work out as he hoped
"I saw what happened a few night ago."
He confronts her with cold fear and anger that nearly drives him mad. How could he have let himself be so naive?
"What do you mean?"
She plays the dumb card so well he would think she didn't know anything - but she was the one that enacted those sacrifices, he saw it with his own eyes
He drags her to a distant, quiet area of the Hall of Guards, where nobody can hear them.
"The sacrifices! Three of them! You sent us to find them only to bring them here and kill them!" He keeps his voice down for discretion, but he really wants to yell at her.
Miiko changes with these words: a stern look replaces her confused one and her voice suddenly becomes hostile.
"Those sacrifices were needed! You know Eldarya can barely support us! The sacrifices could be the difference between our livelihood or death!"
He questions her relentlessly: how long has this been going on for? How many sacrifices? Why dragons after all they did?
"How did you know they were dragons?"
Lance pauses and he knows he fucked up. How to get out of this? Did Miiko mention that at all that night? Hopefully neither of them remember that well to know to difference.
"You said it during the sacrifice." He seeths.
They argue for what seems like hours, until Nevra comes seeking Miiko for something.
"Don't mention this to anyone." She hisses before walking away to meet the vampire.
He realizes that she feels no remorse about it, and that he and his brother could never be safe in the guard. Feeling lost and betrayed, Lance begins to ponder what to do next with this newfound information - and he finally acknowledges that not only does he feel lost, but he is truly lost as well. His future is uncertain from here on...
I hope you like this! This is my own personal headcanon so I apologize if it doesn’t make too much sense - there’s a lot of thought and background that went into this and because it’s so complex it’s a bit hard to explain without making it too long. As I mentioned earlier, I do have a nearly complete backstory on Lance that I devised based on what we know from the episodes, and I would be happy to write that as well if you’d like!
Requests are open, ask them here!
But first, please read the rules list for asks!
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visionsofus · 4 years ago
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Hi! I am absolutely obsessed with your SV stories - you are an amazing writer. If it's possible to make a request... a ff about the rest of the team forcing Wanda and Vision to acknowledge their feelings <3
hello! thank you for this fic request! you could say I took it and ran way too fast with it. anyway! it's called 'call it what it is' and I've planned for this to be 4 parts long ☺️ here's the first part and I hope you enjoy!
Call it what it is - part 1
synopsis: The pining between Wanda and Vision is starting to become a problem. The rest of the Avengers are sick of the tension that has them walking on eggshells, though the pair seem oblivious to it. Tony and Natasha lead an effort to send Wanda and Vis on a getaway disguised as a ‘mission’, complete with lush beaches, smart dinners and a bed that is the perfect size for a couple. With Wanda and Vision resigned to 72 hours in each other’s presence maybe it’s finally time to call their relationship what it is.
read on AO3 ~
“I think everyone knows why I’ve gathered you here today.”
The team stared at Tony apprehensively. He paused; his hands folded as he sat before them at the head of the briefing table. Nat was by his side, rolling her eyes at such dramatics.
“It’s about Wanda and Vision,” Tony continued, looking around at everyone meaningfully. A few shoulders slumped in relief at this, everyone had been a little high strung lately. They had big weapons bust happening in a few weeks that had taken months of careful work.
“Is something wrong with them?” Steve asked, his eyes sharpening in concern. He glanced over his shoulder cautiously as though expecting the pair to enter the room at that exact moment. But they were cleverly tucked away and distracted by Friday in a different part of the compound.
“I wouldn’t put it that way,” Tony said, “but I’m sure you’ve all noticed the tension between them.”
The table broke out in noises of agreement, Sam in particular made a rather loud exclamation of exasperation. Yes, everyone had definitely noticed. It was hard to keep a secret when you lived and dined with your colleagues. Not that Wanda and Vision were very good at keeping their attraction a secret.
“You know I was in the kitchen with them the other day,” Rhodey said, and everyone turned eagerly to listen, “and I kid you not there was electricity literally in the air. Wanda handed Vision a plate to dry, barely brushed his hand and boom! All the kitchen lights went out.”
“I saw them training the other day,” Sam chimed in, “and I felt like I needed to go bleach my eyes afterwards. Every time they touched it was so –” he shivered as he spoke “—tender.”
“So, you get the problem then?” Tony said.
“Not really,” Steve replied, he’d smiled at Sam and Rhodey’s stories but became serious. “It seems like it’s their business Tony, I don’t know if any of us should be butting in.”
Tony nodded in understanding, stroking his chin in consideration. “I’m not one to get in the way of young love. But they’ve been getting careless in training, distracted. We can’t afford any big accidents next month just because Wanda’s got the hots for my boy.”
Nat snorted. “Your boy is half the problem, don’t forget.”
Tony continued, unphased. “The idea is we send them away on a simple mission, and they can,” he made a convoluted gesture with his hands, “and then they come back ready for work again.”
Rhodey looked at Tony in mild disgust. “What the heck is this?” He imitated the hand movements.
“I think that goes beyond words,” Tony said, eyeing Peter purposefully. The kid had sat quietly throughout the whole discussion, fiddling with the moleskin journal he carried round the compound with him. Maybe Tony needed to remind him he’s not actually an intern again.
“Uh, it’s okay Mr Stark,” Peter said looking around as though he wasn’t quite sure he was allowed to speak, “I’ve already had the talk.”
Tony sighed something between exasperation and fondness. “Great, kid.”
“Back to the plan,” Natasha prompts and with a few taps on the tablet before her the report appeared on the big screen spanning one wall of the room. “This is the target, Stevie Vern. She’s going to be in Santa Monica next week for a wedding, so we’ll put Wanda and Vision in the same hotel.”
“Isn’t it a bad idea to put them on a mission while you’re trying to get them to address their... tension?” Sam asked, his phrasing delicate.
“That’s the thing,” Tony continued, “we already know everything we can from Vern, but we’ll tell Wanda and Vision that their job is to figure out why she’s in California, see if she’s meeting another buyer, that sort of thing.”
“We already got the intel this morning that Vern is only there for a wedding, relatively speaking, she’s not that big a player,” Natasha finishes, folding her arms.
“Still seems risky,” Rhodey frowns.
“To be frank, right now they are useless to us and themselves,” Tony said honestly. Tony could see everyone thinking things over and even Steve seemed to resign himself to the necessity of the plot. “We do this, help them address their shit and then everyone is fighting fit for next month’s operation.”
Steve pulled Natasha aside as everyone left the room to return to their daily routines.
“I’m not sure about this,” he said quietly, leaning against the doorway and frowning in consideration.
“I wasn’t either, until Tony convinced me,” Natasha said, looking after their teammates as they trailed to the stairs, some going down to the training rooms while others continued to the kitchen for lunch. “He asked what I thought about their relationship, and I told him I think they’re good for each other, but not as they are now. Wanda barely sleeps some nights; I hear her pacing from my room. Vision’s been getting careless the last few weeks; he’s gets too caught up in keeping an eye on her that he forgets to do his job properly.”
Steve looks at the ground as he took her words in. Natasha continued solemnly. “It seems light-hearted now, but if anything were to happen...”
“They could hurt each other, get careless during a mission and hurt someone else,” Steve finished her thoughts aloud. It was a sobering consideration and something they both hated to think their friends capable of.
“I trust Wanda, but I don’t always trust her power.” The admission hung heavy in the air. “If anything were to happen because of a careless error on her part, she’d never forgive herself. This feels like a way to at least help with one part of that carelessness.”
“You’re right,” Steve sighed. “Damn, I hope this goes okay though.”
“Come on,” Nat said putting a hand on his arm as they started towards the staircase. “Nothing is going to go wrong. I’m sure we’ll all be laughing about this years from now.”
“I admire your optimism,” Steve mumbled, trudging up the stairs after Natasha
Remarkably, when dinner arrives Sam, Rhodey, Tony and Nat had roused themselves to join Wanda and Steve in the kitchen. She’d helped him cook the spaghetti bolognaise and guessed that it was the smell of the spices and stewing meat that brought everyone up to the dining table. Vision was sat at their already, having spent the half hour in the lead up to dinner with his nose buried in a book. At least Wanda thought he was reading; it was difficult to tell when he was so still, and the pages turned so slowly. For all Wanda knew, Vision was miles deep in his head scouring the internet. He had become frustratingly difficult to read.
With everyone sat around the table, Steve began serving at the same time that Tony set his tablet down in front of Wanda’s plate.
She looked between Tony and the screen in confusion, mostly just wanting to eat her steaming bowl of spaghetti. It had been a long day, after an even longer, sleepless night. But Tony gestured for her to look closer and so she did.
“It’s your next mission.” Tony said, twirling his fork around and scooping up spaghetti and sauce.
Wanda frowned.
“Santa Monica, target is Stevie Vern.”
Wanda hummed curiously, still a bit confused, but excited at the prospect of traveling to the other side of the country. She scrolled through the in-depth report Tony had given her. It was pages and pages long, filled with background information on the target all pertaining to the big weapons deal the team was planning to crash in just two weeks time. It was an important task then, she decided. Wanda hated to admit it but having Tony trust her with it made her feel a tiny bit proud. As she came to the end of the file she frowned; there was a pair of return plane tickets.
“Who’s going with me?” Wanda asked.
“Vision,” Natasha replied for Tony as he held up a hand, mouth filled with food. He nodded in confirmation.
Wanda’s stomach dropped even as her heart fluttered at the potential. A trip? With Vision?
“Me?” Vision asked, sounding just as surprised as Wanda felt.
“Is that going to be a problem?” Tony asked.
“Of course not.” Vision’s response was so quick that it sounded false, even to Wanda’s ears. Everyone else around the table had suddenly become conveniently interested in their food.
“Why us?” Wanda asked. Though she really wanted to know why it was only them assigned to the mission. She’d never been on a solo mission so far from the Compound before and she couldn’t help feeling a little bit suspicious. Why was Tony pairing her up with Vision? They certainly hadn’t had the best track record recently.
“Because we can’t afford to send anyone else,” Tony supplied casually. “And you have the perfect cover to figure out why Vern is in Santa Monica. The official words is she’s there for a wedding but we think there’s more to it than that. You and Vision can easily blend into the resort and pretend to be a couple on a honeymoon or something.”
“Excuse me?” Wanda choked out.
“We’ll do what?” Vision exclaimed at the same time.
“We’ve all been undercover for missions before. And no one will ever question you two being an item,” Natasha said, meaning to sound reassuring but missing the mark.
Wanda tried to ignore the warmth on her cheeks at that and the sly look Nat sent her. Biting back a snide comment, she stuck her fork into the spaghetti and began to eat. Vision asked more questions as they ate, what exactly they were expected to do once in California and how they were going to get their intel, but Wanda struggled to pay attention.
It wasn’t until later that evening as she packed a small bag that Wanda came to terms with the face that the trip was really happening. She was going to spend three days interstate with the very person she’d spent four months desperately trying not to fall for.
Everything was going to be fine.
Fine.
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kindofwriter · 4 years ago
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Hey there! My group of friends have been hardcore considering turning a passion project of ours into a real podcast, and I was wondering if you had any advice for newbies putting together a show. We’re a small, young team, but we have a lot of passion for our concept and some writing/sound experience under our belts. Do you have any tips regarding finding actors, the process of plotting, sensitivity readers, or anything else you’ve had experience with in your projects? Thanks for reading!
Ok, finally ready with this! Thank you so much for the question, I will try to share my ~wisdom~ in the following post, but feel free to ask any further questions!
How to start a podcast: 1. when you’re new and/or 2. when you have money!
1. It’s easier than you think! My first advice is to just go for it! Even if it doesn’t quite go as planned you’ll have fun, and it’ll give you great experience for whatever you want to work on next!
Casting:
I’m going to assume this is an unpaid project (hence the former part of this advice being for free podcasting!) but if that’s not the case please skip to section two!
When I can’t offer any form of payment for a project I like to use friends as a cast. Not because my friends deserve any less payment! But because I can pay them in free chips and credentials for their portfolios, and it makes me feel slightly less bad!
Ways to go about deciding which friends to cast: I was lucky enough to do a lot of theatre work in my first year of uni, so I already knew a lot of people who were interested in both acting and production work. You’ll probably come across several actors who think voice acting is beneath them, but who wants to be friends with those people? What I’m trying to say is: if you have friends who are interested in theatre they’ll probably be interested in this! Especially given the past year.
I also poached people from my DnD group, because I could already gauge their acting specialities from that, and I knew what kinds of things they were interested in based on which DnD campaigns they enjoyed best.
If you know anyone who is interested in public speaking, whatever you all those reading awards where you read aloud dramatically, or something like radio and TV presenting then they’ll probably also be interested and do a great job! The great thing about podcasts is that all you really need is someone with a good voice - they’re free to do whatever they like with the rest of their face as long as they’re reading the lines!
You can, of course, also put out a casting call. It’s very important that you make it clear that it would be unpaid work. Even if you plan to set up a kofi, patreon, or kickstarter (info in the money section!), if you don’t have the money to begin with you shouldn’t promise it to people.
There are up and downsides to both. Casting people you know means you’re more likely to be comfortable working with them, there’s less pressure to offer payment, and your cast are more likely to have free time specifically for this project. However, you won’t have the draw of casting known industry voices, and (like I found!) your cast may not have any social media engagement whatsoever!
If you put out a casting call you’re more likely to get a pool of diverse voices, it will likely be people invested (even if not plugged in) to the industry, and you can request that they have their own equipment! However, you then have to work with people you don’t know, a level of professionalism that isn’t usually present on first time projects may be expected, and unpaid casting calls are not wildly well received.
Personally, for your first show, I’d try to use as many friends, or even friends-of-friends as possible. That being said, if you want advice on putting together an audition pack let me know!
Plotting:
It depends on what kind of show you’re aiming to write, but in general plotting a podcast is kind of like plotting a TV show. First of all you should plot out what’s going to happen in a season. Then plot out what’s going to happen in each episode. Ideally each episode will have its own arc, but things don’t always work out like that.
I like to plan things out in a fair amount of detail beforehand (this is especially helpful if you’re writing collaboratively.) Start with what’s going to happen in each episode. Once I know that, I then like to write how it starts and finishes, then the content in bullet points. If you ever can’t think of anything then don’t worry! A lot of things really come together when you’re actually writing.
The most important thing is to not worry at all about the first draft. Just get it down, editing is much easier and more fun once you have something to work with!
There are definitely much more qualified people than me out there giving advice about writing and plotting though; even if it’s directed at prose and script writers it’s still more than applicable!
Sensitivity readers:
If you have the option of sensitivity readers they’re always a great idea! But asking someone to read your work (usually for free) is both time consuming and potentially risky if you don’t know and trust them.
Tumblr, the writeblr community specifically, is a good place to find a sensitivity reader. A lot of people want the practise and are willing to do it for free if you put a call out.
One of the best ways to get feedback on your work is to cast/find people who are appropriate for the roles and then ask for feedback. Obviously they don’t have to, but you’ll find that usually they want to. You can aid in this by giving them some way to give feedback anonymously - maybe a google form - as no matter how chill and friendly you are as the prod team you will always be seen as In Charge.
If you don’t feel right asking someone, especially from a marginalised group, to read and comment on your work for free, you can always just ask general questions in forums or on social media. This isn’t as reliable, as people can lie online, but if you find the right communities and explain you just want to portray characters as accurately as possible there will always be people willing to offer some help. Reddit, for all its flaws, builds great communities, though remember to check the rules to make sure people outside of whatever group they’re aiming to support are allowed to post.
Of course, the first step to writing anything outside of your own experience is a tonne of research. The sensitivity reader should be picking up on small things, not telling you the basics of their experiences. And everyone’s experiences are different, which makes this even tougher! You can get things so spot on for a handful of people whilst inadvertently offending others. Be prepared to be adaptable and take on criticism, but also remember that you don’t have to bend to everyone’s whim; one person saying ‘but this wasn’t my experience!!’ doesn’t mean you’ve done a bad job.
Equipment:
I know you didn’t ask, but this was what I found scariest when I was Brand New.
If you have the money and you’re very serious about this I haven’t encountered a single person who wouldn’t recommend a Blue Yeti mic. However when you’re just starting out, and especially if you’re not planning to have all of your cast together record together/separately but with the same mic, blowing over $100 on a mic is huge, scary, and not always feasible.
I have three small desk mics that I loan out to my cast when needed. They cost ~£30 ($40) from (ew, I know) Amazon. You don’t need a mic for each cast member - you don’t even need a mic for the max number of character speaking in a scene at once. You could probably do it all with one mic, but the time that would take and the affect it would have on scenes may be worth the extra cost! These obviously don’t produce the crisp quality a professional recording mic would, but they have a pop filter and a windscreen and seem to do a good job at reducing background static.
Further noise reduction: Mr Alexander Jalexander Newall, when starting his podcast empire half a decade ago, got it in one: blanket forts.
If you can build a little fabric den for your cast to record in: perfect! If not, tell them just to stick a duvet over their head. This increases the risk of moving duvet sounds, but reduces everything else! And if they shift under the blanket you can always ask them to get comfortable then read the lines again.
And, info courtesy of the McElroys: you can also record in a wardrobe or a room with plenty of bookshelves if you don’t want to build the world’s most bangin’ blanket fort.
The most important advice you will ever receive:
Don’t be scared to ask for help! Join Facebook groups and ask questions! Join discord servers! Message people on Twitter and ask for advice (certain ppl are much more amenable to this than others, but this is pretty clear from their Vibe)! Heck, you can message me on Twitter (or here. Or send another anon. And if I don’t know the answer I’ll ask someone who does!) Everyone just wants to help everyone else, and if they don’t they’re probably not the kind of people you want to associate with. Good luck! And let me know once you socials are up, so I can follow and get excited!
Now, onto 2. Money stuff!
A lot of the info stays the same, but money kind of raises the stakes. Once money’s involved, especially once money and people you don’t know so well are involved, suddenly you have to operate like a business.
Casting:
If you’re planning to pay actors proper wages from the get-go you probably want to put out a casting call. Paid work will attract professionals, and professionals will not only do a great job, but will also help you gain an audience (and have their own equipment!)
You get to decide what the hourly rate is, but usually, depending on where you’re from, there is an average hourly rate voice actors get paid, and if you’re nowhere close to that people will be put off.
You should also make clear what the hourly rate includes: whether it is just recorded audio hours, or includes table reads and directorial time. A lot of people just have every actor record their lines separately, sometimes without direction, then edit them all together. This certainly saves on cost, and makes for a quick turnaround, but it’s no fun, and sometimes makes the show kind of soulless.
Kickstarters:
You can run a kickstarter on an unpaid project, in the hopes of eventually paying the cast and maybe funding future seasons. But I’m going to assume this is advice for ‘I can pay the cast, but what is a kickstarter for?’
Well, that’s up to you! It can be for equipment, for better editing, for podcast music, for podcast art, for a pay rise for the team, for bonus content. Depending on how many stretch goals you have, it can be for all of these things!
In short: backers give money, and get things in return, for example $5 might get you a pin badge, while $100 might get you a signed poster. When the kickstarter reaches a certain goal, maybe $5,000, then the team may then have enough money to produce a holiday special, for example. At $10,000 everyone on the team may get a 10% pay rise.
This is a great way to get people invested in the show, and a great way to make money! But if you want a really great kickstarter you’ll probably want to hire someone with experience in this area.
Contracts:
Money means contracts! Usually two will suffice, they just need edited for each individual team member:
An NDA, to prevent people from discussing the show in any inappropriate situations.
And a literal workplace contract.
You’ll be able to search how to draft these online, but it’s useful to have the help of a lawyer. There are people who do this specifically for podcasts who’ll be able to help you out, but again: you have to pay them!
Equipment:
As I said, actors will probably have their own equipment, but if you want them all recording together: you can rent a studio! They’ll already have all the equipment for you, which is The Dream!
Or you can convert a room into your own studio! Get some soundproof panelling on the walls and invest in a good mixer. I’m afraid I don’t have much advice on this, as I cannot afford anything close to a good mixer! But there are plenty of articles online with helpful information.
I wouldn’t recommend making a paid podcast as your first project, as it’s a lot of pressure, and would almost definitely mean bringing new people onto even the production side of things. There’s always the option to work on another project first, something smaller-scale, to work out any roadblocks you may run into during the paid show. But I’m not telling anyone what to do: if you’re ready, go for it!
Anyway, this was very long and quite rambly, and is probably filled with things you don't actually need to know! But I hope at least some of it was useful! Please feel free to ask any other questions - now or in future, PM or anon - and again: best of luck! I'm so excited for you!
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lilydalexf · 4 years ago
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Old School X is a project interviewing X-Files fanfic authors who were posting fic during the original run of the show. New interviews are posted every Tuesday.
Interview with MaybeAmanda
MaybeAmanda has been a longtime participant in X-files fandom. She has 29 stories at Gossamer, the earliest being archived there in 1998 and the latest in 2012. I've recced some of my favorites of her stories here before, including "Malus Genus" and "Snow in Alabama." Big thanks to MaybeAmanda for doing this interview.
Does it surprise you that people are still interested in reading your X-Files fanfics and others that were posted during the original run of the show (1993-2002)?
It does, in a way.  The feedback I get nowadays is either of the "I read this like 20 years ago and I just read it again" variety or the "I was too young back in the day but I have been watching the show in reruns/on XYZ streaming service/on the full-series of DVDs I got for $3 from the thrift store and I was THRILLED to discover fanfiction was being written even in the Dark Ages!" So it's a bit of a surprise, but it's a pleasant one. I answer every mail/comment because my mama raised me right!
What do you think of when you think about your X-Files fandom experience? What did you take away from it?
It was great. It was fun. It was educational. It was a godsend. Even with the occasional bouts of back-stabbing and flame-throwing, it was mainly a welcoming, inclusive place to be. I made so many online friends who have turned into meat-friends (do they still call them that? Probably not).  During the first run of the show I had small children and we had relocated for my husband's job.  I had very little social life, but the fandom gave me a chance to meet and connect with people who liked what I liked. Then I discovered online fanfic, and it was even better!
Social media didn't really exist during the show's original run. How were you most involved with the X-Files online (atxc, message board, email mailing list, etc.)?
ATXC I think.  A lot of email lists - 5 or 6 or 7 or so over the years. Gossamer, of course, Ephemeral when that came into being.  Haven discussion boards. My own websites.
What did you take away from your experience with X-Files fic or with the fandom in general?
More than anything?  I am a fangirl.
What was it that got you hooked on the X-Files as a show?
I have always been partial to sci-fi and speculative fiction, but it rarely makes it to the screen - large or small - without being trite, clichéd, or just plain bad. It's easy to forget that The X-Files was groundbreaking - smart, scary, funny, insightful, intriguing, complex plots, on-going mythology. It looked great. It sounded great. David Duchovny was pleasant to look at, too, and damn! Gillian Anderson is/was one hell of an actress.
What got you involved with X-Files fanfic?
I found XF fanfic - somehow - probably by accident, or by way of a recommendation - and it blew my mind.  I had written fanfic (of a sort) with my friends in highschool, so I was familiar with the beast, but to find what amounted to excellent story after excellent story for free within (relatively) easy reach (because dial-up, right?) written by people who, for the most part, were thrilled you read their story and were happy to talk to you about it, about writing in general, about your shared obsession - that was amazing. As I am sitting here typing this I am feeling that thrill again - discovering Karen Rasch, Madeliene Partous, Paula Graves [Lilydale note: AKA Anne Haynes], Sheryl Martin and all the other early BNFs was, well, the only word is exciting. I felt like I was a member of a secret society and that I was sitting at the popular kids lunch table, all at once. (Don't forget, in the early days, shippers were considered delusional outliers - seriously!)
What is your relationship like now to X-Files fandom?
Good?   It's not as lively a place as it once was, but I haven't renounced my citizenship or anything. If I get a rec, I check it out. I know there are those who like to pretend they never had anything to do with the fandom, but why? I am still a proud XPhile.
Were you involved with any fandoms after the X-Files? If so, what was it like compared to X-Files?
Angel (a teeny tiny bit) while XF was still running, but those fans were - I don't know the word.  Hardcore does not begin to do it justice. I wrote two short pieces at a friend's request then backed away slowly. Sherlock (a bit) - it is/was very LJ centred and that made it hard to find things. A lot of it moved to tumblr which made it harder, then to twitter, which - no.  I was involved in one of the less fashionable facets of the Sherlock fandom, so I was really a fringe-dweller there, too. It seemed clique-ier than XF, and they all seemed so young, and they all knew EVERYTHING about everything, and every damned thing was political, and, and, and... GET OFF MY LAWN!
But maybe I am remembering the XF fandom wrong. ;)
Who are some of your favorite fictional characters? Why?
Like, all fiction? Mulder and Scully for sure. Arthur Dent. Sherlock Holmes in most of his incarnations. Spock. Winnie the Pooh. Why do I like them?  They speak to me, I guess.
Do you ever still watch The X-Files or think about Mulder and Scully?
I haven't watched an episode in probably two years (back when it was on regular tv).  Yeah, I think about them surprisingly often.  Story ideas, weirdly.
Do you ever still read X-Files fic?
I finished re-reading The Iolokus Series a couple of weeks back, so yes.  It's excellent comfort reading.
Do you have any favorite X-Files fanfic stories or authors?
Lots! But as far as authors go, I hate playing favourites. I will miss someone I shouldn't and feel like crap.  The Iolokus Series by MustangSally and Rivka T. is probably my all-time favourite fic because it's so very well-written, and so very fucked-up. Kipler's Strangers and the Strange Dead is also terrifically well-written and clever. For complex, interesting case files, you can’t beat syntax6 - pick any of them.
What is your favorite of your own fics, X-Files and/or otherwise?
Oh geez. Seriously? I wrote a lot of collaborations and I love them - and my co-authors - all!  Stuff I wrote on my own: Anniversary Waltz (first XF fic I wrote so it's sentimental.) Or Blue Patches. Or Epiphany. Or The Gifts of the Magi (On a Kaiser Roll). Or 221XF.  Gonna stop now.
Do you think you'll ever write another X-Files story?
Every time I thought I wouldn't, I did. I would never say never.
Or dust off and post an oldie that for whatever reason never made it online?
Nothing finished ever went un-posted. All the unfinished stuff remains unfinished.
Do you still write fic now?
Haven't for a while, but it's not as if I have said "I SHALL NEVER WRITE FANFIC AGAIN!" I just have nothing in the works at this moment.
Where do you get ideas for stories?
With fic, it's usually from canon - some question unanswered, some road unexplored, some "what if?" that needs iffing.  With "original" fiction, damned if I know.  A snippet of overheard conversation, an interesting photo, something a random story generator spit out at me.  Sometimes things just click.
What's the story behind your pen name?
Okay so...many years ago I was on a (smallish) fic list with a friend.  There was a challenge posted - a bad fic challenge. We knew we could write some truly bad fic if we really tried.  One of the rules of the challenge was to post under an assumed name so no one would know who they were voting for. Well, my friend and I wrote something truly, painfully horrid and we were very proud of its ghastliness, so were brainstorming possible pseudonyms. She hated everything but had no real suggestions of her own.  I knew that she was a bit of a Trekkie (like me) and I said - What about Amanda Greyson and Joanna McCoy?  And she said  - What?? Huh?? Why?? And I said - Spock's mother and McCoy's daughter and she replied, "Maybe Amanda is Spock's mother but on Star Trek there is not a Joanna." By this point, I was SO DONE, and I became MaybeAmanda and she became NotJoanna. Really.
Do your friends and family know about your fic and, if so, what have been their reactions?
It took years for me to admit it, but yeah, they know.  They didn't entirely get it.  The reactions I most often got were:
"Ew! You write stuff without being forced?? Ew!!"
or:
"Is it smut? I bet it's just smut. You write smut, don't you? Pure filth, right? I can't believe you are wasting your time writing pornography! That's disgusting! You sicken me! Um, can I read some of it?"
And of course:
"If you are going to write anyway, why don't you get published and become fabulously wealthy?"
which is really two questions, neither of which is easily answerable.
Anyone who tracked my work down (because I told them I wrote, but not my pseudonym) usually said something like, "Hey! You're an okay/passable/decent writer! Why don't you get published and become fabulously wealthy?"
Yeah.
Is there a place online (tumblr, twitter, AO3, etc.) where people can find you and/or your stories now?
Same old email (maybe_a@rocketmail_dot_com). Gossamer, my site, my LJ and probably some other places.  I can't lie - it's a bit scattered.
(Posted by Lilydale on August 4, 2020)
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