#and kick people that engage in unwanted touches

[notyournightsky]

KICK HIS ASS, DONNA!!

[siriusist]

How Band of Brothers Characters Would Act in a Fake Boyfriend Scenario to Deflect Unwanted Advances Towards You:

Dick Winters: Immediately clarifies, "We're not dating" when you loudly proclaim him as your boyfriend, only to immediately correct that you two are engaged and he's looking for a ring when he's hit by a death glare that he should play along.

Lewis Nixon: Smugness abounds. If it was a scenario of you just being unwantedly hit on by some rando at a party or a bar (I.E: Not an immediate threat), he would stretch that shit out to annoyingly comedic level. "HOW DID WE MEET HONEY?" "AND THEN SHE WALKED IN ON ME AND COULDN'T TAKE HER EYES OFF ME-" "YOU KNOW SHE BEGGED ME TO GO OUT WITH HER-", to the point where if he pushes it any further he's risking blowing your cover. An under-the-table kick could be involved. Finally, he'd settle into the role of being your boyfriend rather TOO well, complete with arm extended over the back of the booth you were sitting in and smugly smirking at anyone who passed, taking full advantage of pulling you closer and passing it off as needing to make things "believable."

Ronald Spiers: Would not even bother to "play along" with you dating. Would simply step forward, eyes somewhere between dead and deathly, and say in a deadly cold voice, "They're with me." He would not move until they left the bar or the room, no matter how uncomfortable it was for everyone else involved.

Joseph Liebgott: Depending on how serious the infraction was (I.E: Unwanted comments to a full fledge inappropriate touch), things can get ugly fast, depending on how much alcohol is involved. Even with little to no alcohol in his system, Joe would start off joking and acting like he couldn't believe it, before using the element of surprise to either kick the guy's legs out from under him, or full out deck him, all while people are trying to pull him off. This would probably unintentionally lead him to admitting his feelings for you- or at least, his overreaction leading to a complete and utter razzing about the two of you anytime you were in the same space together.

Donald Malarkey: With one, "We're dating? Oh! Yeah- we're dating!"- Malarkey launches into an entire backstory about how you started dating on the spot- from the fact that one day he saw you didn't have an umbrella, to him wanting to get one for you, to anything else that he felt sold the fact that he knew everything there was to know about you ("She sleeps with her socks on 'cause her feet get cold, and she likes chamomile tea- what else is there to know?").

Carwood Lipton: You would have to be the one to initiate the ruse, as Carwood's too much of a gentleman to assume anything. As soon as you put an arm around him, however, he'd look at you squarely as if to clarify, "You need me to do this for you?"- before slowly and carefully pulling your arm and hand back to kiss it lightly and squeeze it pointedly. He'd stay by your side protectively for the rest of the night.

Shifty Powers: Please. If this man had to play act as your boyfriend, your cover would be blown as soon as you can say "Jack Robertson." If you initiated any bodily contact without explaining why, he'd turn bright red and start stammering, look down, and not be able to get out a full sentence. If it was a scenario where you took him to the side and was able to explain that you needed him to act like your boyfriend, he'd take your arm and act like he was escorting you to Sunday church- full of reverence and respect. It'd be to the point where you'd have to tell him to ease up and relax.

Floyd Talbert: Chuckles about the suggestion he'd be your boyfriend, pretending to laugh it off, before raising both brows and looking at you at your proposal. "You're serious?"- followed by a stupid grin plastered across his face all night. Dancing with you and loudly introducing himself as your "BoYFrIeNd" follows, until someone spills that he's had a massive crush on you the entire time you've known each other, and played off his own feelings by dating others to make you "jealous."

Bill Guarnere: He'd also be a teaser- until he realized some guy was hitting on you. He'd be up across the bar in two seconds, holding the guy against the wall and asking why he was looking at "his girl." The rest of the night, he'd be touching you in some way- arm around your shoulders, hip, hand- but basically acting as a buffer from anyone who'd even dare come close to you. Some guy tries again? Bill ain't gonna ask twice.

Babe Heffron: He'd stupidly beam until he realizes he was part of a ploy- then he'd be angry half the night for being "used," only to step in when you really need him to, complete with a big showy kiss for the entire place to see. You two start dating soon afterwards.

George Luz: Immediately starts singing the first song that's playing on the loudspeakers to you, especially if it's a love song. Makes the most obnoxious declaration of love that it ALMOST makes you embarrassed, if you weren't so (secretly) delighted.

[bytes-and-blessings]

Smuggling Hope - Inklings Challenge 2023

So I signed up to do a little writing challenge this year called the @inklings-challenge! Which you can read more about here: https://inklings-challenge.tumblr.com/about Basically, I've had story ideas in my head for as long as I can remember. Now I finally found something to give me a kick in the pants to write. Maybe this is the first draft to the first chapter of my first novel ever. Maybe I never touch this story again. Who knows? not me.... But without further ado, welcome to the first installment of what I currently call "The Beacon Universe" (Actual name TBD) -----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Captain Nia Twig woke up at the wheel her ship to the sound of a proximity alarm.

BEEP EEP EEP!

There was message from an incoming ship.

“This is gate border checkpoint Theta-Sigma-Alpha-5, please prepare for boarding with your itinerary, ship registration, and passenger manifest. Failure to cooperate with border patrol will be reported to Zytharian authorities and may result in fines or arrest. Thank you, and Glory to the Emperor.”

Nia groaned and scrambled out of her pilots chair to prepare for the inspection. As she walked through the ship she stashed away a box of stuff from back home and placed it under her bed, with a menstrual garment and some pain pills on top to keep any searchers from touching it. Looking around the area, there was a torn piece of paper that she though she had drunkenly thrown in the incinerator months ago:

The oath and way of the Beacons are as THE LORD once declared: “You are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do they light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a lamp stand, and it gives light to all who are in the house. Let your light so shin-”

Nia was interrupted in her distracted readings by the ship’s alarm system again:

~~~~~WARNING ~~~~ AIRLOCK ENGAGED ~~~~ INTRUDER ALERT~~~~~

“Computer! Stall’em!” She yelled out. The ship’s AI wasn’t anything fancy, but it could pretend to have just enough dysfunction to slow down anyone trying to board. (Or with any luck, kill anyone in a rush via asphyxiation so she could claim it was an accident. Technology sucks, right?)

She stuffed the paper in her pocked and climbed down to the hold. At the bottom, she reached behind the ladder and flipped a leaver.

A few of the crates started to lower into a hidden compartment beneath.

“Come on, come on, move you stupid thing” Nia slammed her foot against the floor.

Suddenly the mechanism squeaked to a halt.

She could hear the boarder ship’s airlock finish connecting to The Night’s Reverie. She’d have to greet the Inspector at any minute, or else the rest of his people’s fleet would show up and blow them both out of the sky.

She dove below the boxes, and started to hunt around. In the tangled mess of wires, there was a stray piece of jerky stuck between the gears. Nia couldn’t quite reach through the gap to catch it.

BANG BANG BANG

Someone was knocking on the other end of the airlock doors, trying to gain entry. If she didn’t let them it, it was going to be a firefight, but if the fuzz caught sight was what was in these crates, well, she’d have bigger problems.

The Captain pulled out a lighter with the symbol of a white bird in flight carved into it.

A small flame springs out with a flick of the flint, she barely has a moment to enjoy the feeling of the flames dancing in her control before she shoots it to knock the jerky out of place. She immediately threw the lighter up onto the main deck, then turned herself into a small flame and landed on the deck as the boxes almost crash into their compartment, crushing the area where she had just been an instant ago. The false floor slid over the contraband as the captain punched in the code to open the airlock for her unwanted guests.

“Still not going to be a Beacon, but Uncle’s old lighter trick is handy in a pinch.” She thought to herself as she punched the intercom button to speak to the visitor waiting in the airlock. “This is the Captain of the ship speaking, who is there?”

A posh voice responded, “Captain Glory Ashwell, are you in there? This is Inspector Zimri Klerk, of the His Greatness’s Most Noble and Important Hyperlane Border Inspections Agency. I am here to proceed with a random inspection of your ship. I assume you have your paperwork in order and are ready for inspection, Captain?” a

From the voice, Nia expected someone much taller on the other side of the airlock. Instead standing there was an short and fat man in a faded but finely pressed dress uniform. He stood proud before her not a piece of his balding silver hair was out of place. His mustache was curled perfectly at the ends, looking at it was almost like looking at a second pair of eyes. At his left side he held a bright red cane with the Empire dragon snarling at it’s head, like forgotten Celtic letterhead come to life. In his right hand he somehow managed to hold both a clipboard and a lit cigar.

Nia cleared her throat, and then addressed the man. “Ah yes Sir, as you can see here on my manifest, my ship, The Kobold is just on a routine courier run to the middle systems of the Empire. If we could make this quick, my clients are very important people with urgent business, Captain. They’ve waited long enough for these goods.”

“Very well Captain. Let’s keep this quick shall we.” He took a puff of the cigar and stormed past her onto the ship.

It may have been the longest inspection she had lived through in her entire life.

He poked in the flight room.

He tapped his cane all around her living quarters.

He crawled under the sink.

He licked the dust between the crates.

He even accidentally knocked out a fake wall Nia didn’t know the ship had.

By the end of it, he looked less like a man to her, and more like some cross between a relentless hound dog, and a relentless hound dog breathing tobacco smoke from his lungs. An evil, fire-breathing dog of war armed with a clipboard of wrath and health code violations.

Finally, it was almost over. Inspector Zimiri stood right next to the holds ladder and put away his pen.

“Well, everything looks fine here, as long as you don’t have any rebel contraband under here then I’ll be on my way.”

With a single motion, he flipped the hidden switch with his cane and stepped aside to reveal the contraband crates.

A moment pasted, then a second as the crates were slowly lifted by the traitorous mechanism. Neither person seamed to move or breath for a second. Finally Nia let out a long sigh, and pulled out a wad of bills from her inner coat pocket.

She faked a smile, and tried to approach the Inspector congenially,“Look here friend, there’s nothing harmful here. It’s just some luxury goods I need to keep extra protected for a client in Casino Monte. Some rich dude wants camping supplies to reenact some ancient survivalist U-tuber. Bear Gorillas or something? I don’t know man, can’t we just figure this out? It’s not like it’s weapons or anything, you know, right?” She said, holding out the bribe money.

The Inspector let out a deep sigh. He leaned his cane against the wall. Then he removed his glasses and began to methodically clean them. For a moment Nia could swear he tapped a button on his jacket. The little man straighten up to glare at her. The cigar smoke began to fog up his glasses once more and reflect the dim light of the ship. The Captain began to back away from the twin burning suns staring at her from his glasses.

“Do you take me for a fool?”

He walked over and opened the first crate to find a stack of water bottles, blankets, and food with single stuffed goose sat on top of the pile of goods.

“We both know that there’s no way a ship of this size has the fuel to get to the destination on your manifest.” He waved the faked papers in the air, “You’re more likely to drop out of the hyperlane somewhere above the Miser-Cordia system. Right where his Greatness’s Military has currently blockaded a group of those traitorous followers of the Beacon’s Path and the foolish civilians roped up in their little games. Do you think I didn’t realize from the moment your little star skipper left the hyperbridge that figured out that you were carrying the most dangerous weapon known to man inside?”

He dropped the cigar and waved the stuffed goose in the air, as if demonstrating his point.

“My good captain, it appears to me that you are smuggling hope.”

Nia whipped out her pistol and pointed it at him. “Listen, buddy, I don’t know who you are. And I don’t care. As I was saying, I’m not smuggling weapons, or drugs, or slaves, or any of the other fucked up shit that all of your friends turn a blind eye to every day for a couple of creds. So unless your sanctimonious pride and your thin wallet is more important than your life, maybe grow some brains out of that mustache. I’m not a Rebel. I just see a demand and I fill it. I don’t care about your stupid wars, buddy. This is just business. Just take your cut of creds like every other self serving sleaze bag in the galaxy, and let me go.” She insisted, probably too firmly. But Nia didn’t care, her pulse was in her throat and she could feel fire aching at her fingertips for the first time in years. This was about to go south, fast.

Still brandishing her pistol, Nia took in the sight of the little inspector. She had to keep her gun arm pointed down at an awkward angle to place the muzzle beneath his nose. When he wasn’t running around her ship, it was easier to see that this man only reached her shoulder. His mustache barely twitched at the sensation of cold metal. He dropped the goose back into it’s box. With it fell the clipboard. His fingers twitched for the cigar that had once been in his hand. Suddenly, the man before her wasn’t a robotic inspector of a dictator anymore. The cold glare in his eyes had softened into something still determined, but also seemingly defeated. Like the last blue flame of a dying fire. He reached down to pick up the cigar again.

“I have to say, I am quite disappointed in you, Miss Philomena Bryne.” He said, letting the smoke blow into Nia’s face. He grabbed onto a pin on his lapel, and broke it. Nia could see a few ripped wires leaving what she could now see had been a wiretap. “We both know you don’t need that toy to turn me to ash, so let’s drop the pretense, hm?”

“That’s not my name, that girl is dead. Who are you, and how do you know her?” She backed off, but kept the pistol high.

“Ah my mistake Captain,” He said, reaching up to scratch his lip. “Here I was, under the impression that I had caught up with a great Beacon of Old: A mythical group of people who could take flight in the stars without a ship, a Peace Keeper, a great Defender of the innocent, a living flame in the galaxy’s eternal night. I thought I was tracking a relic of a forgotten era of Crusades and Caped Heroes; one who was stuck in a universe that has progressed beyond, or perhaps, sunken below religion. And now l see that I have found a jaded business woman looking to profit off another’s misfortune, no? I had hoped that anyone with your flame, who could incurs such wrath of my employees and countrymen, could be nothing less than a saint. But if it’s business you want, then it’s business you’ll get I suppose. You can come out now, my dear.”

Zimiri Klerk tapped his cigar against the wall of the ship, and out of the embers emerged a young girl who could almost have been Philomena's cousin. But her hair soon changed from fire red to pale blonde. She was even shorter and thinner than the man next to her. Nia quickly realized that this was most likely the Inspector’s daughter. Her eyes were the same jet engine blue as his, and just as sharp.

“I will make a deal with you Captain. Get my daughter out of reach of the Empire's ashy dogs, and anyone else who would make her a living weapon. Then consider your bribe to be paid. Now I must go, my colleges will be looking for me. I’ll buy you what time I can. Good luck, my dear.” Then Zimiri Klerk walked to door of the Night’s Reverie.

“And remember Captain, even if you do not think of yourself a hero, to my daughter, and all of those people trapped on Miser-Cordia, you are the last light of hope.”

[hrssment-safety]

Types of harassment!

Dear reader,

To start our blog about school safety regarding harassment, we need to know more about harassment itself. What is it? Are there different types of it? How is it related to school? We will find it out in the following paragraphs.

What is harassment?  

Harassment is considered any improper and unwelcome activity that might cause humiliation and offense to someone else. It can be perceived in many different formats, some of which we'll be talking about today. The ones we are discussing are:

Physical harassment;

Sexual harassment;

Discriminatory harassment;

Verbal abuse;

Bullying.

Physical harassment: This is considered any type of action that can be related to violence, threats, and physical attacks. When it gets to extreme cases, it can even be considered Sexual harassment. Some examples of physical assault are unnecessary touching, blackmailing, threats, assaults, damage of personal property, intention to harm or humiliate, and following or standing too near a person without its consent, all of it is Physical harassment. There are some occasions where it depends fully on both people in the situation. For example, fun shoving someone. For some, it might be considered innocuous, but for some, it might be harmful. Consequently, we need to have communication to know if people are comfortable or not with those types of jokes. 

Sexual harassment: According to the EEOC (Equal Employment Opportunity Commission), Sexual harassment is any unwelcome sexual advance, requests for sexual favors, and verbal and physical conduct with sexual intention. Depending on the circumstances, both people might agree and feel comfortable with any conduct of a sexual nature, but it fully depends on how the person feels and sees it. Unwelcome does NOT mean involuntary. People who commit sexual harassment have the intention to do something sexual and are willing to get your attention. For example, a man whistles at a woman when she walks by. Or a woman looks a man up and down when he walks towards her. Some other examples of sexual harassment are actual or attempted rape or sexual assault, unwanted sexual looks and gestures, cat calls, personal questions about social or sexual life, touching or rubbing oneself sexually around another person, etc.

Discriminatory harassment: According to U.S. Customs and Border Protection, Discriminatory harassment is any unwelcome offensive conduct that is directed at an individual because of their identity. Identity refers to race, sex, age, disability, religion, national origin, color, reprisal, genetic information, sexual orientation, and status. Discriminatory harassment can be verbal, physical, or non-verbal and, when talking about this type of harassment, it all depends on how the conduct is perceived by a reasonable employee, instead of the person who engaged in the conduct. Some examples of discriminatory harassment are epithets, slurs, jokes, negative stereotyping, or threatening, intimidating, or hostile acts that relate to a person's identity.

Verbal abuse: Also known as emotional abuse, verbal abuse is the range of words, actions, and behaviors used to manipulate, intimidate, and maintain power over someone. These actions of verbal abuse, include insults, humiliation and ridicule, the silent treatment, and attempts to scare, isolate, and control. It doesn't need to be directed at someone, but actions like slamming doors, throwing things, destroying belongings, or harming pets are considered verbal or emotional abuse because they are used to intimidate.

Bullying: The United Nations describes Bullying as "the intentional and aggressive behavior occurring repeatedly against a victim where there is a real or perceived power imbalance." Bullying can be described as any type of harassment. It can be physical harassment, verbal abuse, discriminatory harassment, etc. It can be verbal, with teasing, insulting, and threatening; it can be physical, with hitting, kicking, and the destruction of property; and it can be relational, through the spreading of rumors and exclusion from a group.

When we talk about harassment in schools, we need to be careful to not offend anyone. But we also need to pay attention and be careful so that it doesn't happen to ourselves and our colleagues. In the following posts of the blog and Instagram account, we will be addressing more specifically how harassment in schools happens, how they are shown to society, and how we can protect ourselves and others.

REMINDER: Whenever you are being a victim of any type of abuse, it is NEVER your fault. Sometimes it isn't noticeable, but people who commit any type of harassment are usually manipulative and convincing. If you're ever going through it, know that there will always be someone by your side willing to help. 

Stay safe! 

SOURCES:

https://www.getimpactly.com/post/most-common-types-of-harassment

https://www.getimpactly.com/post/physical-harassment

https://www.webmd.com/mental-health/signs-verbal-abuse#

https://violenceagainstchildren.un.org/content/bullying-and-cyberbullying-0#:~:text=The%20unwanted%20behaviour%20is%20hurtful,and%20exclusion%20from%20a%20group.

https://www.un.org/womenwatch/uncoordination/antiharassment.html#:~:text=Harassment%20is%20any%20improper%20and,or%20humiliation%20to%20another%20person.

[gisellefaina]

      Do I Need Sex Crime Attorney?HOW DO YOU FIND A SEX CRIMES?

It is true that many people who are accused of committing sex crimes are experiencing cataclysmic upheavals in their emotional life. They experience hurt, mistrust, fear, and future apprehension. These intense feelings frequently cause the person to lose touch with reason. Even while sexual offences are very serious crimes, they can nonetheless happen by accident. Sexual assault or sexual harassment can be deemed to be any unwanted physical contact. Even a mere accusation could change the alleged offender's life due to the severe consequences of a sex offence conviction. The defendant's entire life will be flipped upside down when the severe criminal consequences and potential sex offender registry are added to the equation.

You may feel emotionally drained, broken, and petrified of your future. However when your rational mind kick back in to being operational again, you will realize that a sex crime attorney near me will assertively defend you in court and protect your rights and reputation.

The Strength you need on your side- Sex Crime Attorney

if you have been investigated or charged with a sex crime, make sure that you have a sex crime attorneys by your side. a criminal charge of a sex crime alone can have immediate and lasting consequences, and a conviction or even probation will haunt you for years. best sex crime defense attorney the initial shock, embarrassment and potential consequences can leave you feeling overwhelmed at the prospects of having to deal with this type of accusation. to protect your rights, it is important to contact your sexual assault attorney immediately. the stakes are high in this type of case, and aggressive measures must be taken right away to increase your chances of a successful outcome.

Where can I locate a sex crimes lawyer? Engaging a sex crime attorney who is acquainted with the county courts, commissioners, local laws, standards, and procedures is typically a good choice. By all means, research the attorneys you are considering on online review sites. These websites can be helpful in gaining insight into the experiences of other clients who have used legal services, even though they are not the be-all and end-all. Pay close attention to complaints and signs that your criminal defence attorney may not have communicated effectively. Of course, your attorney cannot guarantee success in a sex crime case, and a poor review may be the consequence of unreasonably high expectations, but it is generally a good idea to find out how the public thinks about a certain criminal defence.

One of the worst experiences in a person's life, having to register as a sex offender is agonising. Before making any rash decisions, you need to be given clear instructions on how to continue. Based on your situation, you might be able to utilise a less traumatic, more acceptable resolution to your sex crime accusations. You'll require a criminal defence attorney who can take on a challenging case with vigour. Someone who can stand up to any unjust or unfair activities taken against you and represent your best interests.

if you or a loved one has been accused of any sex crime, our los angeles sex crimes lawyer can help. the consequences for a conviction on crime can be severe and life-changing. at the manuelian law firm, our los angeles criminal defense attorneys will see that your legal rights are protected and that you receive a fair trial.

[aerosiderwrites]

Archery Practice ... Yandere Childe x Harbinger!Reader

warnings for genre typical portrayals of unhealthy relationships... ngl childe is kinda tame in this one tho

Word Count: 2k

Mid-evening tended to be an unpopular time to train. Most were having dinner, finishing their work day, and getting ready for as restful night as possible in the frigid climate of Snezhnaya. You typically would as well, but with a lot to reflect on and frustrated energy, you brushed off the snow on your person as you entered a Fatui training facility. You gave a quiet greeting to the guards who manned the building, who stood at attention at your arrival. You paid them no second thought as you began to navigate the pristine building.

You followed a path down the corridors you knew by heart, as even years before your ascension to being a Harbinger you found yourself here more than at home whenever your weren’t on assignment. Most windows into the various gyms were dark, and the ones with people in them had young recruits of little consequence to you.

You turned a corner when you heard someone calling for you. You processed the distinct voice as Childe, the most recent addition to the Harbingers. You ignored him, hoping that your increase in pace would not catch his attention. You mentally pleaded that he would avoid the archery range in favor of the other combat gyms.

He didn’t stop, as he never did, as his voice continued to come your way. You closed your eyes in weak attempt to hide your wince as he addressed you by name, by your real name, not your Harbinger title as the other nine would.

You stopped dead and turned to where he was trailing behind you and gave him your attention, unfortunately rewarding his bad behavior, “Titles only, Childe.”

“I wasn’t sure you could hear me” Childe responded, now standing tall right in front of you, his smile still the same, ignoring or otherwise completely unbothered by the standoffishness on your end. “I wanted to see if you wanted to spar while you’re here.”

Like clockwork. Every damn time you came in here and he was here too he’d ask. Each time you’d say no. Each time he’d hover around you until one of you had to leave. It had worked for the other Harbingers, as he now paid them no mind but for whatever reason, he still engaged with you. Tonight, you hoped your verifiable excuse and unfriendly aura would be the last straw for him.

“I’m just going to be doing target practice today,” you said, hoping to deter him. “I don’t want to do anything too strenuous today.”

“Oh you are? Do you mind if I join you?”

You blinked, “I didn’t know you knew how to use a bow,” you verbally dug your heels into the ground, even though you knew he could just walk into the range and practice along side you if he so wanted. There were no restrictions to who could use what when, but you desperately wished he would take a hint and leave you alone.

“I’ve been practicing on my own more recently, actually,” explained Childe, “And considering you’re the best archer among us, I can’t imagine having a better training partner.”

You narrowed your eyes at his compliment, while delivered earnestly, you couldn’t help but interpret his words as being subtly facetious. Since Childe sidestepped your frustrated hint with ease, you relented with a sigh, “Do as you please.”

The two of you headed to an archery range, Childe walking along side you, while you stewed in silent annoyance. So much for introspection time.

No one quite knew how to pester quite like Tartaglia. It was the popular opinion among the other Harbingers that the 11th was obnoxious. While you and your contemporaries preferred to work in the shadows and keep the often extreme extents of your servitude to your Archon hush-hush, Tartaglia, or Childe, as he preferred, ended up with a style that was far more akin to a performance. However, unlike most performers, he would make sure that his performance would be the last his audience would ever see.

You stopped in front of a door to the small range, opening it up unceremoniously, and Childe followed close behind. The room lit up, and illuminating the long room with three suspended targets, at three distances. Even with the unwanted company, you stretched and warmed up on autopilot, the silence between you and Childe surprisingly comfortable.

You glanced over, Childe having gone through his warm up routine faster than you. He had called his bow already, and you found yourself gawking at the absolutely abysmal posture he held as he aimed at the closest target, the one on the far left.

His shoulders were hunched and his bow hand gripped the bow in such a way that seemed entirely unsustainable. The arrow sat flimsy in his drawing hand, the only saving grace of the shot being the strength with Childe drew, which was borderline disturbing. You weren’t sure if he was showing off, or if he genuinely didn’t know to hold back.

You held your tongue as you watched him fire the shot, your eyes barely able to follow as the arrow swiftly embedded itself deep into the target, although the hit was only one by the smallest of margins

You watched him fire two more arrows, the second being a ring outside of the bullseye, and the third a near miss from the top. Both would be a challenge to pull from the targets as the fletching of the arrows were barely all that stuck out.

“See, I have a problem with being consistent in the hits I land,” Childe sighed, aware that you were observing, “What would you recommend?”

You took a deep inhale, “I think most children who pick up bows for the first time don’t have posture as bad as you.”

Childe flinched, his body language exaggerated, a pout resembling a kicked puppy having formed on his face, “Cut me some slack, I’m self taught!”

You remained unrelenting in your onslaught, “That’s obvious,” you scoffed, “You put way to much strength into the draw, especially when you can barely hold the bow itself. I’m amazed you hit the target at all.”

As as satisfying as it was to drag his form through the mud, Childe’s hurt expression only seemed to deepen, and you let yourself be worn down. “Draw the empty string, I’ll tell you what you need to fix.”

He did as you asked, and you rationalized to yourself that you were ultimately helping the Tsaritsa if you assisted Childe here. If he were ever stuck in a situation where he could only use a bow, you didn’t want him to be caught with his pants down. As invasive as he was, you didn’t want him to die or anything.

You lightly tapped his upper back, “Don’t hunch.” He fixed himself quickly. You moved his elbow up on his drawing arm, and went around to bend his elbow on his bow arm, going in quickly, and touching his as little as possible. You gave explanations for why each mistake would be detrimental for any kind of combat, and how to develop instinctive shooting, while making him maintain proper posture.

You were surprised how well he seemed to internalize what you explained, and you didn’t stop yourself from going into more detail than was feasibly retainable, but he stayed attentive, and showed a passion you weren’t expecting. You eased into a comfortable rhythm, and with rudimentary fixes, Childe was able to improve.

Time passed quickly, your engagement far more than either of you had expected. Childe had been trying to gauge you for a long time, but your persistence into giving him as little as possible became entertaining in and of itself. He enjoyed the open resentment of the other Harbingers, and before you had let your shell crack, he had enjoyed yours just as much.

Your patience with any mistakes was unexpected, your exasperation and irritation with his presence having dissipated entirely as you focused on helping him despite yourself. It was endearing seeing this side of you, a side that showed itself with surprisingly little prodding or string-pulling. It felt… natural, and unfortunately for you, it was also very endearing.

“Hey, [Y/N],” he started, interrupting a demonstration you had started about sights, earning a surprised look from you as he got your attention.

It took a split second, but you noticed he used your name instead of your title, your guard went back up, and you narrowed your eyes at him, “Don’t speak informally with me, use my title, Tartaglia.” You hissed out, using his official title instead of his preferred to emphasize your distance.

“Why? You can call me Ajax,” he offered, testing the barrier you set up. He hid his surprise when you hesitated, pursing your lips. He saw through how you tried to treat him apathetically, and forced yourself to be unkind to him. You were so much softer than you wanted anyone else to be privy to, and Childe was excited to exploit it.

In your own head, you had reached a conclusion that you weren’t sure he had reached, or if he even noticed in himself. You could have been way off, but as someone so at odds with his peers, seen as a tool by his superior, and feared by enemies and underlings alike, the pieces fit in your head and spelled out the fact that Childe was probably lonely.

Realizations clicked together quickly upon this conclusion, but you kept them to yourself.

“I won’t,” you maintained, refusing to let up. You couldn’t stop sympathy and understanding from now changing the tint of your interactions or how you viewed them, but you didn’t have to let him know any of that. Childe wasn’t your business, no matter how much he wanted to be.

“Aw, don’t be like that,” Childe cooed, holding back a patronizing urge to pinch your angry cheeks, “I just wanted to ask why you’re helping me, since you seem to dislike me so much.”

You shifted your weight where you stood, “I don’t think you’d leave me alone either way.”

“That hasn’t stopped you from ignoring me before.”

Resentment bubbled in your chest, “So you are aware that you’re a pest.”

“Only because I like you.”

You were baffled that he could just say something that familiar, and you hoped any warmth that showed itself on you wouldn’t be interpreted as anything other than embarrassment on his behalf. “Well, stop.”

Childe seemed more amused than anything at your words, it only feeding into his idea that you’re just playing hard to get, “Am I really so unlikable?”

“You have no idea.” Any understanding you gained during your interactions being emotionally tossed to the wayside as your couldn’t bring yourself to care about someone with such a deliberate lack of regard for boundaries.

You disarmed yourself and made way to the door, pulling it open only for it to shut fast before you could blink. Your eyes followed the gloved hand that slammed it shut, Childe now far closer than you have ever let him get before.

You didn't want to turn around, and when you did you found yourself regretting it. His eyes were cold, completely unamused at your intent to leave while he was enjoying your company so much. He didn't mind a chase, but he needed you to realize that he was serious, and very difficult to deter.

If being pleasant and fun wouldn't get you to loosen up, he could change his approach until you changed your mind.

It had been a very long time since you felt this small. You’ve always been aware of Childe’s strength, but at the end of the day, despite his irritating nature, he was an ally. Or was. In that moment you looked up to see his lighthearted facade disappear so completely, you understood that regardless of your allegiance to your Archon, he was a threat.

“Don’t go, I still have so much I’d like to learn from you, [Y/N].”

[jojikawa]

Fatal Attraction | Kayn x Fem!Reader | League of Legends

˗ˏ✎ [Honey-Maron] *ೃ

✧『Fandom』: League of Legends

✧『Character』: Shieda Kayn

✧『Word Count』: 2,960 words 15,587 characters

✧『Summary』: As a child soldier, Kayn had only made one friend who he wanted to protect during the battles against the Ionians but during his final battle, he was too busy defending himself to see what happened to her. Her body was never found so he knew she wasn't dead and now it was his goal to find her.

(This hasn’t been proof read enough times so bare with my typos)

There was a time in the Noxus military where the battle was getting hard and the Commanders needed a new tactic that would surprise the Ionians. The idea that ended up going through was for the military to pick up poor children off of the streets and train them to fight well enough to distract some Ionians for more capable adult soldiers to come and pick them off.

Kayn was amongst these many children along the way he had met a small and dainty girl that he wanted to protect. When he was injured, she always knew how to patch him up, even if it were with a dirty cloth and a minimal amount of medicine. He assumed that her previous family was doctors and them being tragically killed is what lead you to be on the streets at such a young age.

She was the only person that showed him compassion and the two of you formed a natural bond. Whatever happened, he wanted to make it out with her alive.

════ ⋆★⋆ ════

During the training the children were issued to have, you were having a hard time getting used to the sudden change. You were always so small and fragile, Kayn was always doing things for you. He knew that once the battles started that he wouldn't always be there to protect you, so whatever he learned from Noxian commanders, he taught you in secret so that as time went on you wouldn't fall behind the next day.

Eventually, the day of the battle came and on such short notice too. It was assumed to be the last day of this group of children before they would need to go out and fetch a new batch.

“(y/n),” Kayn called to you. “Remember the promise you made to me.” His voice was young but stern. You nodded, too nervous about the fighting for you to reply any other way.

The two of you and others like you were so young and were forced to engage in such violence at the hands of your own commanders as bait and when everything started, all you could do was watch as kids you knew were cut down in front of your eyes.

You had lost Kayn and with a sword and dagger among the fighting, you were left to fend for yourself. You didn’t want to attack these people, instead, you wanted an adult to come to save you but you knew that would never happen, and out of fear you ended up killing more men than you can count on your own two hands.

You weren’t even thinking about the promise you made to Kayn, you were just so scared and couldn’t bear the thought of dying such a horrible death. You wanted to run but at every turn was a man trying to corner you to kill you.

Most children who didn’t die took the chance to run away before they were noticed so, as time went on you had gotten more and more outnumbered.

A group of three men had surrounded you. You could take one, maybe two but three wasn’t something you were made for. Not to mention your own physical strength was still lacking.

“Sheida!”

Kayn had heard his own name faintly in the crowd of people fighting. The Noxus regulars had come to take care of the real threats but there were too many people in the way for him to get to the voice he was so familiar with.

The fighting lasted around a day or two before it was over and word got around that Noxus had attacked an Ionian village.

All the kids who part took were all dead or gone.

Kayn had been left behind. He had been scooped up by the Order of The Shadow not long after.

Master Zed offered to take in Kayn since he had the fighting spirit and tenacity of no other but he didn’t listen to his plea of look for you once more even when he begged to.

It was very hard on him since members of the Shadow kept pushing him to believe that you were dead and your body simply couldn’t be found or maybe your body was there but was ravaged beyond recognition. You were in a better place now.

Kayn refused to believe that and he bided his time in the Shadow until he felt like he was strong enough to make the move of looking for you so that he can have closure once and for all. He felt that if he were the new leader of the Order of The Shadow, he would have the proper resources to locate you somewhere in Ionia.

When Zed had given Kayn the task of retrieving a Darkin weapon in Noxus territory, he saw this as his opportunity.

Kayn had underestimated the journey of obtaining Rhaast but he had done it. His own will kept Rhaast from stealing his body. Now he felt like he could be the most powerful man in the world.

Kayn went back to the Epool River, where everything had taken place and where everything had gone wrong. What remained of it was still damaged from long ago and unwanted memories had flooded his head. He pushed all of that to the back of his mind because knowing if you were really dead or not was his top priority.

Apart from damaged structures and now a small grave honoring those who fell that day, some locals were unable to move and still reside in what’s left of the village. The only thing he could think of was asking locals about you before he decided to take more extreme measures.

“Excuse me” He called out to one person.

“I’m looking for a girl-, uh, a woman I mean.” He said to another. “She has (color) hair and (color) eyes.”

No one was able to help.

He had been asking around all day and at this point, Rhaast had been urging him to start killing people, which would be what made them talk. Kayn refused.

It was the evening when Kayn was about to give up for the day when he was approached by an older woman who seemed extremely nice.

“I’ve never seen you around here.” She commented. “You’re really unique looking as well. You’re not from around here.”

Kayn frowned. “No, I’m not from here. I just came to look for someone, is all. This is where I lost her. It was years ago and I don’t think she’s here anymore.”

“You’re looking for someone? What makes you think you would find her here anyway? This place hasn’t been the same since that terrible invasion that happened years ago. So many children died. Most locals left to a safer place after that.” The old woman remarked as she looked at all the destroyed homes that had never been repaired.

Kayn was hesitant at first but it ended up coming out anyway. “She was here when that happened! We got separated and then when everything stopped she was gone. Have you seen her?”

“Really? I’m so sorry the two of you had to endure that. Those Noxians are as cruel as they come. There were a few children we found that survived. They ended up leaving but a girl stayed behind. Maybe you can ask her where this person you’re looking for went.” The old woman explained.

Kayn’s eyes widened. He suddenly got a second wind. Is it possible? Could finding you really be this easy. “Yes, please! Where can I find her?” He asked frantically looking around.

“She doesn’t live in the village anymore. She lives a bit far out in the forest. She lives alone as well, so try not to startle her.” She warned.

Kayn smiled but it wasn’t his usual devious smile that he would wear while killing Noxians. It was so hard for him to contain the excitement he had boiling inside of him when he got this news. Just when he was about to give up as well.

Kayn carefully followed the directions he was given. This woman was deeper in the forest than he thought. How could anyone "normal" live this far out and be okay with it?

He made his way through and eventually he began to realize that he was at his destination. It was a small neat cottage next to a small pond some yards away.

At first, he saw no one, so he had tread along the cobblestone path quietly. The pit in his stomach was very present and it made him nervous. Rhaast could sense this and only laugh at how silly he looked.

Then Kayn had heard faint water sounds.

Someone was at the pond nearby!

When he got there, he saw a small, young woman. She was covered in scars and wore a simple white dress and a sun hat as she gathered water from the pond below.

She must have not heard Kayn’s footsteps because she has not acknowledged his presence at all.

“Excuse me.”

Kayn’s voice visible startled the woman, causing her to knock over the bucket she had been putting clean water into. She quickly turned around and was immediately frightened.

“I’m looking for a woman...” His sentence was unable to be finished once your eyes met. It’s like he had already known.

The skin, the hair, the eyes. It was you. You were alive!

“(y/n)? You were here all this time?” His knees became weak and he collapsed to the ground at the realization.

“Who are you? I don’t know you!” You furrowed your eyebrows at him, upset at this man for disturbing you at your cottage.

“It’s me, Kayn! Don’t you remember?” A satisfied look dressed his face gracefully as he dropped Rhaast and slowly began crawling toward you.

“No! You’re not Kayn. He’s dead. If you’ve come to kill me just do it already!” You closed your eyes and kicked, sending you back and further away from him. You could feel the water of the pond touching the edge of your palms.

“No, I never died, I’ve always been here. I thought I was the only survivor. Trust me! I taught you how to fight- at the camp, remember?” You could hear the speak of desperation in his voice.

Did you really believe he left you behind like that?

You opened your eyes and really looked at him. He did have black hair and the same color eyes but his body was different. It was...demonic.

“What happened to you...?” Your voice was soft. “I thought you died and that’s why you couldn’t-” you cut yourself off with a choked sob.

Ever since that day you’ve been so alone. The only person that really understood you, you believed to be dead and gone. You had even been trying to move on but then he suddenly appears, unharmed.

“This weapon. It’s special but we can talk about it later. I’m not what’s important right now. I’ve been looking for you ever since we’ve been separated.” He started. “If only I knew this village was still standing. I would’ve come sooner.”

To Kayn, you looked so different but he was able to tell that it was still you. You were so...beautiful. Just as small and fragile but with a strong will to live.

“You were looking for me? I’m sorry. I thought you were dead. I-If I knew, I would’ve tried...” you then mumbled something Kayn couldn’t hear. You were so shy.

Your eyes were glossy like you wanted to cry. So soft and delicate but you were covered in scars that only a warrior could have. You were truly so unique. Too kind for this world.

This was all too much for you. Maybe he should think of something else to talk about that would help since this was a lot for both of you.

“This is your house? So this is where you’ve been hiding out all this time. We should go inside.” He remarked.

“O-Oh, well, okay.” You stood up and grabbed the bucket. Despite knowing Kayn was alive, a sad, sunken look graced your features.

It had been a very long time since you two have been together but it seemed like something more recent was troubling you.

“When we go inside, please remove your shoes. I try really hard to keep dirt and dust outside.” You told him and he did as he was told.

It was so warm inside and the lingering smell of baked goods and cinnamon filled his nostrils. Were you really living here all by yourself?

“S-So, I’ve been wondering.” You touched your index fingers and looked slightly off to the side as he stood in front of you.

A blank look covered his face, confused at your sudden urge to speak to him, but it was welcomed with a curious silence.

“Where did you go? You were...nowhere to be found...when I needed you.”

“There were too many!” He blurted out. “I heard you but I couldn’t get to you. Please don’t think I abandoned you. I’m here now.”

You gasped at his sudden outburst but then sighed when you had processed what he had said. “You can sit if you want.”

The two of you sat on the couch together, drinking a homemade drink you had made. You held your cup but didn’t drink.

“And you?” Kayn broke the silence.

“Huh?”

“You asked what happened to me and I wanted to know what happened to you.”

You frowned. “No, I meant what happened with you being gone for so long. I figured that you died but you’re here. What were you doing all this time?”

“Oh, I...” should he tell you? Was it against Master Zed’s rules to disclose something like that? He couldn’t t...

No. You were more important than some old man’s rules. He was going to be the new leader anyway and in his new vision for the Order of the Shadow, you’re there with him.

“I have been training with a group called the Order of the Shadow. I’ve been with them ever since.” He said with confidence.

“Are they responsible for what happened to your body?” You pointed out that the left side of his body was different.

“In a way, yes. But it’s not by force. I have a great plan and me looking like this won’t last for long.” He explained. This didn’t make you feel better at all.

“I see.” That was all you said in response.

“When I lost you,” you had begun, clenching the drink you had made. “I was surrounded by a lot of men. I had already killed so many of them but I was tired, I couldn’t fight anymore.”

“I-I feel so bad.” You saw the glass on the table and grabbed your head. The memories of gore and bloodshed etched into your brain, haunting you every moment of your life. “They were just trying to help me and I hurt them.”

Kayn didn’t know why but he felt like he should comfort you somehow and he did. He rested a hand in your shoulder. “It’s not your fault. A lot happened that day. They probably would have killed you. You were just defending yourself.”

“NO!” You yelled. “I stabbed one of them because I was scared. Then I was knocked out by the other. When I woke up I was in someone’s home. They took care of me and the person I stabbed died. I’m such a horrible human.”

“Don’t say that! You’re amazing. It was war and you were scared. I’m here for you.”

Your breathing began getting out of control. You were a monster. You destroyed so many people's lives and took lives that can never be brought back.

“Why did I have to live?” Hot tears began spilling out of your eyes. “They were innocent people.”

Kayn was at a loss for words. You were right, they were innocent people but you were too. It was just an unfortunate situation in the wake of war. He had no idea how to comfort a person in such a complex situation.

He hugged you, squeezing you and letting you sob into his chest. He felt so bad. You were hurting all this time...alone.

“Those who’ve died will forgive you. You were forced into this life. You had no bad intentions. Please understand that you live for a reason. Think about it. The two of us were in a horrible situation where we both could have died.”

Your sobbing had ceased, but only just a little. “But here we are, alive and together. Sole survivors.”

“Growing from this won’t be easy but you aren’t alone anymore.” He added.

You clenched onto him. “Ever since that day, it’s been so hard for me to form a real connection with someone. I’m so glad you lived.” You shyly reached your hand up to his face.

His skin was soft and although he didn’t expect this, he didn’t pull away from you. “You’ve grown so much and you’re so capable. I’m very proud of you.” You’re leaned forward and pressed your forehead against his.

Kayn didn’t know what this feeling was. It was almost like nervousness with a bit of excitement. All this time he’s missed your voice and caring nature. He was naturally drawn to you and you were to him. He was your only family.

“I love you, Shieda.”

Kayn immediately kissed you. You weren’t surprised at all. You kissed him back and he held you close.

Tears, of sadness of your pain and the joy of being with Kayn again, streamed down your soft cheeks. A hole inside of you was filled and now you could begin healing mentally and emotionally.

[beskar-cowboy]

The Following

Summary: The Mandalorian takes an interest in you. He likes to linger in doorways. (2.1k words) link to read on ao3 

Pairing: The Mandalorian x gn!reader

Warnings: mentions of canon typical violence, potential violence against reader, stalking, protective Mando, yearning, mutual pining, sexual tension, this takes place before Episode 1 so no baby and Mando doesn’t know how to process his feelings lol

The Mandalorian doesn't speak to you.

He never has.

He watches you work without ever once coming up to the bar. He conducts his work with Karga, leaves shortly after with every single pair of eyes in the cantina on him. You can’t tell if he doesn’t notice behind all that armour and beskar, or if he doesn’t care.

Then he’s gone for days again. Sometimes weeks, months. Sometimes it's a long time before you see him again and you think you’ve forgotten how shiny that helmet is. But then you’ll see something glimmer in the corner of your eye and in comes the most feared bounty hunter.

The Mandalorian watches you.

So much so that Karga and the people who conglomerate at his preferred table tease the Mandalorian for it. Just go up there, order a drink, say something!

It’s not that easy, Mando thinks. But he doesn’t entertain them. They’ll never let it go if he engages in this conversation so he bottles it up, swallows it whole and one day he’ll die with it deep inside his chest and no one will ever know.

But it’s never that easy either.

The people in Nevaro are anything but sweet, and eventually the Mandalorian notices how the patrons of the cantina bother you. He watches how the entitled ones saunter up to you, bother you with too many questions, too many touches which you recoil from, all of them unwanted. He watches how they don’t get the message and it angers him. Which it really shouldn’t; he’s never fucking spoken to you and you can clearly handle yourself.

He’s taken note of the dagger which you holster in your belt, as well as the one lodged against your ankle, tucked away inside your boot. They’re well hidden, but not from Mando.

Point is, you don’t need his help. You never indicated that you needed or sought protection from anyone other than yourself. He’s seen you throw a punch, he’s seen you threaten, promising a good fight they won’t win. He’s seen you handle yourself.

Which is why this is all the more confusing for him.

He’s started…. Escorting you home….. From a distance. He thinks you don’t notice him, how he’s always a few steps behind you, lost in the crowd with his visor tracked on you.

He’s convinced himself he’s doing it for you, for your protection, for your safety, because he ultimately feels something for you that he can't even fully admit to himself yet but actually.  

He’s just as selfish as all those other scumbag patrons that you have to deal with at the cantina.

He’s selfish when he stays till the end of your shift, when he makes sure you see him placing those extra credits for you on the table he was sitting at, when he lets you walk out before him and stays close while you lock up the cantina and then pretends to walk in the opposite direction.

He thinks you don’t notice him, the most feared and prestigious bounty hunter. But you do. That glimmer.

You round the corner, close to home but you press yourself tight up against the wall. Waiting.

And he sees it - obviously - your sudden movements, the sway of your hips as you send yourself around a corner you don’t usually turn on. He plays it cool and keeps walking straight ahead except you’re grabbing his cowl and sending him crashing against the wall you had been pressed against - dagger to his neck.

“You’re too shiny for your own good.” You seethe at him and Mando has to stop himself from laughing.

It’s strange to see such a furious, almost dangerous expression on a face with such kind eyes, soft - pretty features.

“Why are you following me?” You ask, pressing further into his cowl with your dagger, cutting through the thick material. He raises his hands slowly in surrender, friendly.

And you know he is. You know he is because you’ve watched him the way he watches you.

He leaves you extra credits when Karga doesn’t, he stacks the cups everyone’s used to reduce the mess you need to clean up at the end of the day. He’s polite, quiet. He’s never done anything to prove himself a threat. But you can’t help it, not in some place like this, like Nevaro.

“Why have you been following me?” You ask gentler this time, lowering the dagger and slowly putting it back on your belt.

You’re a bit embarrassed, you’re not sure why you nearly attacked him like that, you knew it was him, you know he wouldn’t hurt you like that but that little voice in the back of your head didn’t let you grow up like that, didn’t let you grow up trusting, naive, dumb. You grew up defending, attacking, protecting. Nevaro might breed cowards but it also breeds fighters.

The Mandalorian still doesn’t respond and you huff, frustrated that he still won’t engage with you. He’s nothing but an armoured wall to you, you couldn’t possibly know of the fucking tsunami going on inside his head right now.

How you shine underneath the moonlight, how it lights up your skin all these new colours with the neon lights off in the distance, your eyes, your nose, your lips. He’s never seen you this up close, not in the cantina, not outside in the real world. The feared Mandalorian is rendered speechless.

You back away from him, deciding to let the fight in you die and go on your way home. If he follows, he follows. But you know the Mandalorian won’t hurt you.

//

He doesn’t walk ten feet behind you anymore.

The Mandalorian has started walking beside you now, keeping up with your pace, however leisurely or rushed - depending on the day.

People stare at him, at the both of you now, when you walk through the night time streets of Nevaro. What’s the bounty hunter doing walking so casually with someone like you? Were you just as dangerous as him? You liked the edge it gave you, that’s what you told yourself.

When he sees your building complex in sight, sometimes he’ll tap your arm and head off, knowing you’re good to make it the last few steps and not wanting to hover like an overbearing parent.

Is that what this is? The need to protect something other than himself?

In his line of work, violence and danger are guaranteed. He can’t control his situation but maybe he can yours. If he can make sure you stay out of danger, that’s good enough for him. But why?

You know why, he’s quick to suppress those thoughts, those bubbling warm and hot feelings he gets when you’re around. It’s easier when you’re not there, when he’s back on the Crest, alone. It’s easier to not think about you. But when you’re right there… he can’t help himself. Can’t help but let those thoughts bubble to the surface like lava.

Whether Mando stays at the cantina until closing, or if he swings back around - after stopping at the shop for parts or the covert - he’s always there. He has been everyday for the last week now. And he’s here tonight.

He watches you work from where he stands, leaned cooly against the entrance with his feet crossed and his hands resting over his stomach.

He watches the way your eyebrows knit together in concentration, trying to scrub the counter clean of whatever substance is clearly caked on. He watches you shine the glasses, put everything away neatly. He notices how tired you look, the way your shoulders sag and bags underneath your eyes - they still shine so bright, even in the low light of the cantina.

“Here.” You toss him something he’s not expecting yet he catches it with ease.

A meiloorun fruit.

You give him such an easy smile  - like it really is that easy - as you lock up the cantina and begin on your way home.

He stares at the fruit as you walk side by side, the colours remind him of a sunset.

You both know he can’t take off the helmet and enjoy it now, in the dark of the night. You both know he’ll savour it slowly when he’s back on the Crest, alone and tired. He’ll let it drip down his fingers, down his hands and forearms and think of you.

If he could eat it now he’d share some with you, he’d watch you bite around the skin he just bit into as well and watch the juices drip into your mouth, like they do into his. Maybe he’d kiss you and you’d share the juice together. He wonders if you’d let him kiss you -

“I know you can’t eat it now but, I just noticed that you didn’t eat anything at the cantina today so I thought you might be hungry.” You shrug, kicking some rocks with your boot and watching them roll further away. Anything to distract yourself from looking at him.

Mando is easily flustered, but no one would guess it from just looking at him. His cheeks burn underneath the beskar helmet, eyes wide.

You had seen the fruit lying around the back of the cantina, stole it all for him. Because you thought he might be hungry. His heart palpitates hard, like he’s sprinting after a quarry, it nearly knocks him off his feet.

“Thank you.” His voice comes out rough, harsh. Like he’s not used to saying those two words. He’s not.

You look at him and smile back. At least, you think he’s smiling under there. You wonder what his smile looks like. You hope he can’t tell how flustered you are. That modulator in his helmet must automatically lower his voice or something, it rumbles through your belly and lights something on fire.

You two continue to walk in silence, so close your arms nearly graze. You notice how softly he grips the fruit, how small it looks in his leather gloved hands. You’d be lying if you said you never thought of those hands, those gloves, that old and worn leather - touching you.

You shiver and you blame it on the cool desert night.

“You know I can handle myself, right?” You ask, fidgeting with your hands and avoiding the intimidating T-shaped visor.

That question had been burning a hole in your tongue for the past week, you’d been dying to know why he started doing this, why he took it upon himself to walk you home every single night.

The Mandalorian stays silent. You take his silence as doubt.

“I was perfectly fine before you came along.” You spit, rolling your eyes and crossing your arms over your chest. He likes how easy you are to light up, little spitfire.

“I know.” He answers cooly, breathy, like he’s chuckling - at least you think it’s chuckling, you’ve never heard him make that sort of sound before.

You huff, unamused. Mando looks at you then, watches you walk with your head held high and looking straight ahead, watching as your small complex comes into view.

The moonlight lights you up like that first night you had confronted him. The Mandalorian remembers how truly dangerous you had seemed - even to him. If you were anyone else he would have raised his blaster and fought back.

The blue light of the moon cools you, makes you seem… chill. Relaxed even. He wants to touch your face.

“You’re very capable.” He adds, as he thinks of you - you with fire in your eyes.

His words nearly startled you, you weren’t expecting anything else, much less a… compliment from the Mandalorian. You suppose that means a lot coming from him. He watches your eyes widen, how they turn to meet his, already looking.

That startles him, knocks the breath out of his lungs and he nearly keels over from the blow. Somehow you got him, dead center, straight on. Your eyes pierce his and he feels like he’s been shot. He feels like you can see him and he’s scared for the first time in a long time.

The Mandalorian is scared.

And you smile, teeth sparkling like a predator and you say, “I am.”

You are.

When you reach your door, you fidget with the keys. He thinks you’ll drop them but you don’t.

The door creaks open into your small hut, smaller than he had imagined for some reason. This is the closest he’s ever gotten, the most he’s ever seen of this other side of you; where you are when you aren’t at work, when you’re not around him.

He watches the light disappear from your face as you step inside the dark cavern. You don’t close the door behind you. You stand on the other side of the precipice, watching him in the dark like an animal waiting to pounce. His heart races.

He lingers in the doorway, waiting for something - admission, confirmation, permission. Anything.

You take his hand in yours and tug him through the doorway. He lets you.

[healthnhumans]

51+ Weight Loss Exercises

The best exercise for weight loss can be termed as prevention of excessive gain of weight which is unwanted or harmful for the body. However, this concept is not much considered by many in the population of the world. It is very easy to put on weight but at the same time, it is ferociously...

The best exercise for weight loss can be termed as prevention of excessive gain of weight which is unwanted or harmful for the body. However, this concept is not much considered by many in the population of the world. It is very easy to put on weight but at the same time, it is ferociously difficult to shed those extra pounds and attain a healthy body back again.

Most people are aware when they are in the progress of gaining unhealthy weight of their body. However, some are too busy to look into solutions for rectifying the same while some others are too lazy to care anymore. While there have been various awareness campaigns run across the globe over the last decade to increase knowledge about the harms of an overweight body, a very small percentage of the world’s population would have taken it seriously.

However, there is also a class of people who really wish to lose weight under the expertise and supervision of a fitness expert. But due to money constraints, they would be unable to hire a personal trainer or go to the gym for the same purpose. Hence, they resort to exercising at home themselves. Nevertheless, this attempt has its own demerits as well such as injuries, incorrect style, etc.

How to Lose Weight through Exercises

Once a person understands the need for exercising, then he only needs to make up his mind to follow the procedure on a regular basis. At the same time, he should also realize the importance of maintaining a good diet which is balanced in nutrients because doing either of these may help only up to an extent beyond which it becomes difficult to achieve the goal.

For people who exercise on their own from home, at least at the beginner level, the above mentioned access to workout videos is highly recommendable in order to avoid any challenges in the progress. Considering a combination of cardio exercises and strength training workouts give the best results, mentioned below are 51+ weight loss exercises.

Walking: The easiest way to lose weight is walking. Brisk walking is what is recommended to attain the end result of weight loss. At least 30 minutes per day of regular brisk form of walking could help in burning a minimum of 150 calories a day. The more time one performs this exercise, the faster the chances of losing weight.

Swimming: It has been known that people who see swimming as a means to maintain fitness as well apart from the enjoyment spending time in water provides, have been able to successfully reduce excessive fat from their body. Swimming an hour continuously could facilitate burning of at least 500-700 calories every time. It has been noticed as a combination of both cardio workout as well as strength training as it trims the inches as well as makes the body stronger.

HIIT: HIIT or High Intensity Interval Training is a form of workout wherein the intensity of the exercise is given utmost importance. It is done in short intervals, but intensely focused on. Even if done for just 20 minutes in a day, it burns more calories throughout the rest of the day compared to what a jog could do. It is seen as one of the ways to lose weight faster.

Surya Namaskar: Being one of the traditional forms of exercise derived from India, yoga is on its track of popularity about the benefit yielded from it with regard to weight loss. Surya Namaskar or the Sun Salutation is one of the most effective exercises in yoga which helps in losing weight if practiced regularly. It is a set of 12 yoga poses which focus on different parts of the human body resulting in reducing excessive fat accumulations for the entire body.

Zumba: Some people just hate exercising at the very thought of going to a gym. This could be because the routine appears to be boring and they would love to engage in a workout which is fun to do. Dancing is one such form. But not everyone can learn and follow dance steps that easily either. However, Zumba proves to be one such form of dance where people enjoy doing it simply for the reason that no one orders anyone to follow steps to perfection.

Dancing: There are various forms of the art of dance. In India, classical forms include Bharatnatyam, Mohiniyattom, Kuchipudi, etc while regional types include Bhangra, Kathakali, Gidda, Bollywood, etc. The modern ways if dancing have brought in several other forms as well such as Hip Hop, Freestyle, Contemporary, Desi Jam Cardio, and so on. Every such dance form has its own routine which if followed regularly can help a person maintain or reduce weight as per the intensity of each dance.

Running: Known as the king of exercises related to weight loss, running not only strengthens the legs but also reduces belly fat. A minimum of 30 minutes of running every day or at least 5 days a week shows tremendous results if done regularly. It can be done outdoors or on the treadmill as well.

Cycling: Cycling is a form of cardio exercise. It is a fun version of running in which a cycle is also used to make the ride of workout more enjoyable. Strengthening of the muscles of the leg as well as reducing abdominal fat constitutes the main benefits from cycling.

Squats: This is one exercise done or recommended by most of the people who are fitness experts. Some people have a slimmer upper body; however, the part starting at the end of the midriff will be bulged because of huge thighs and buttocks. The more number of repetitions of squats are done, the more fat from the area of thighs and glutes burn out.

Push-Ups: Strengthening of arms happens by doing push-ups. Also, the entire body gets toned up by doing this exercise.

Plank: This exercise focuses on strengthening not only the core but also the arms. It helps in improving the balance of the body as well.

Triceps Push-Ups: A form of push-ups which involve cutting down the fat accumulated at the triceps is called triceps push-ups.

Boat Pose: This focuses on balance of body weight along with reducing lower belly fat.

Crunches: Crunches work majorly on the abs.

Spider Push-Up: This is another form of push-ups which focus majorly on the arms, shoulders, legs and glutes altogether.

Low Belly Leg Reach: This exercise helps in toning the sides and getting rid of the love handles.

Strength Training: Strength training is as important as cardio workouts. However, some people have a wrong perception of this form that by lifting weights, the body becomes huge. But the fact is that weights help in burning fat and shapes up the muscles appropriately.

Lunges: Focusing on the lower body, the traditional form of lunges of forward movements help in fat reduction by working the muscles at the glutes, hamstrings and quads at the same time. This helps in burning of calories at the maximum level.

Forearm Plank: It is another version of a normal plank wherein the person rests the body weight on the forearms. It strengthens not only the upper arms but also the shoulders and the core.

Burpees: Burpees are one complicated type of workout; very effective in targeting the chest, core and legs all at the same time.

Plank Push-Ups: Plank plus push-ups ends up as one of the best exercises for arms.

Double Jump: A slight mix of cardio and strength workout is what a double jump consists of. It includes 3 exercises in one consisting of the squats, jump and lunge. It is effective for the abs, butt and legs.

Mountain Climbers: It would be noticed as one of the difficult exercises for overweight or obese people. However, once they do mountain climbers regularly, they would surely see positive results in the areas involving the buttocks, obliques and hamstrings.

Jump Rope: Skipping is the term that one must have given to rope jumping activities as a child. Over the years, it has been understood that skipping rope has been effectively known to reduce weight as it mainly helps in toning of the complete human body.

Kettlebell Swings: When it comes to achieving the goal of weight loss effectively for the entire body, kettlebell swings prove successful. It is because the whole body gets engaged even if with low impact yet higher intensity.

Jumping Jacks: Jumping jacks are always recommended to affect the fat accumulated parts of the entire body and have proven to be successful in doing the same. These are one of those cardio exercises which stimulate functioning of all organs.

Cross Trainer: Most people who go to the gym or health clubs love to use the cross trainer. It is also called an elliptical trainer and helps in building the leg muscles and reducing arm fat simultaneously.

Butt Kicks: Like jogging, butt kicks are another form of cardiovascular activity. The only difference is that the legs are made to touch the butt alternatively. With more speed, the intensity of the exercise increases as well.

Plank Jacks: This exercise is another version of the normal planks involving cardio workout as well. Hence the result of doing a cardio exercise as well as a plank is derived from plank jacks.

Side Plank: Working out a plank pose on one arm with the body facing any one side is called a side plank and it helps in toning obliques and losing the fat at the arms.

Bridge: Bridge dips and bridge pose are effective in strengthening the abdominal region and as well as a stress reliever.

Squat Jumps: A combination of squats and jumping brings out effective fat burning results.

Side Lunges: A version of lunges wherein the inner as well outer thighs along with the butt is focused upon.

Bicycle Crunches: Lower belly fat problem? This is the best suitable exercise to reduce that!

Triceps Dips: Toning triceps effectively made easy by this exercise.

Bridge with Leg Lift: Another type of the usual bridge pose and dips with one leg lifted up straight, this exercise helps in focusing more on the lower abs as well as the muscles at the butt.

Jackknife Sit-Ups: This exercise focuses the upper and lower abs altogether.

Lunge with Bicep Curls: Work the lower body along with the arms simultaneously!

Grinding: It is one yoga pose which helps in getting rid of the belly fat.

Squat with Punches: Strengthen those arms as well as tone them along with the glutes.

Pike Push-Up: It is the downward dog pose from yoga which works on strengthening the shoulders as well as the arm fat.

Frog Jumps: It is a plyometric move and the more repetitions are done, weight loss is made more effective as well.

Chair Pose: It is a yoga pose resulting in strengthening of legs and toning of butt.

Dead lifts: The focus point in this exercise is the booty majorly apart from the hamstrings and this is performed using dumbbells.

Triceps Kickbacks: Pick a pair of dumbbells and start working on those flabby arms to get back in shape with triceps kickbacks.

Overhead Press: Targeting the fat at the upper back and the triceps as well as strengthening the shoulders is the main idea in this workout.

Front Kicks: Toning of legs, buttocks and abs happens in this workout.

Split Lunge Jumps: With the use of dumbbells and inclusion of jumps, it is an advanced version of lunges.

Walkout: It is a simple variation of push-ups and works effectively on the whole body.

Warrior Pose: This is another yoga pose which helps in strengthening of the lower body. It has 3 variations as well.

Vinyasa: A part of Surya Namaskara, this exercise helps greatly in weight reduction.

There are various workout related videos available online on several websites that could be accessed from a desktop computer or laptop and in various applications which are present in the virtual stores of smart phones. Some of these are made available to the public free of cost while some others can be bought at a price by them for a fixed period of time or in general without any time limit.

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Nightmares

Masterlist

“She had been foolish to think that he-The Emperor Kaito of Eastern Commonwealth would love her. ”

When rebellions don’t end in happiness but with the ever-lasting and drowning feeling of emotions, what-ifs and memories, will there be someone to put Cinder back together when she falls apart!

Words: 4.5k words

Ships: Kaider

Genre: Fluff, Angst, Hurt- Comfort, Major Plot Twist

Hope you like it! :)

Cinder’s Perspective-

Living a Nightmare:

There, it was that look which she had got from all other people over the years. She had been foolish enough to think that he would have been different. That he of all people would understand, after all he was the Emperor of the Eastern Commonwealth. There she was laying hurt on the stairway but all what he and the people would care about would be her cybernetics. In the end, the Emperor’s personal guest was a cyborg. He had flinched at her sight. His eyes showed confusion then shame, regret and soon came disgust. He did not look disappointed that she was being taken into custody by the Lunar Queen for her execution on Luna. Better he looked happy; maybe the Queen was just saving him a whole lot of embarrassment. 

He had said,” You’re even more painful to look at than she is.”

 She had never believed her partial synthetic heart could break into a hundred pieces but hearing him say those words it did.

Later she escaped and caused him many more problems. He had to deal with the threat of an intergalactic war, why would he not hate her after all what she had done. She kidnapped him. He gave her his support only after knowing that she was Selene, the long lost princess of Luna. It was more of a political move to dispose Levana off the throne with someone younger and naïve so as to avoid a war. She knew it but yet her foolish self thought that the Emperor did it with some other motives.

After she had defeated the Lunar Queen, they had a professional relationship like all other world leaders. The press tried their ways to bring up statements of personal sentiments towards each other but it was a hopeless cause. They had not ever addressed each other as ‘Cinder’ and ‘Kai’ since the end of the rebellion. All kinds of attraction between the two if any were never spoken about. She had thought that the Emperor would not hold her against her cybernetics. She had believed that they could have at least been friends but it was a fantasy. They were never supposed to be anything, their paths were not supposed to cross but yet they did and it had been the greatest tragedy of her life. He believed that whatever happened between the two was an illusion. They did not address their pre-rebellion relationship but she wanted to. She wanted to know that the feelings were mutual and not just on her part. 

Iko had tried to make the two friends but it was too awkward for them. Yet he was not the only one. Even Thorne had problems dealing with her cybernetics at first. The sweet little Cress who should have understood what it felt like did not look to her like a human. Scarlet and Jacin did not talk much about her cybernetics. They had come to accept her abnormalities but delusional Winter liked her Selene. She did not like cyborg Cinder. She was the one person who was most open about her cybernetics and Cinder had come to quite appreciate it. The Earthen leaders did not raise their prejudice against cyborgs. Lunars were better at handling her cybernetics then Earthens to say the least. They felt that cybernetics was quite cool but the opinion was restricted to the people who had been called as rebels during Levana’s term. The aristocratic population of Luna did not like to look up to a cyborg Queen.

She was disappointed when Wolf did not understand her. After all, both of them owed their tragic bodies to science. They had been made and changed into laboratories, tested upon like some lab rats. She had thought that he would understand her as they had suffered for similar reasons. But guess what things do not turn out like the way you want them, she of all people should know that. Even though a wolf-hybrid soldier,he was still human, she was 36.28% not.

She recalled the time when she had addressed the issue of Cyborg laws on Earth in one of the world meetings. Everyone had looked to her as if she had grown another head. Although they had promised to look into the matter half-heartedly, she came to realize that such promises were foolish to be taken into account and kept. Over the years she had learnt ways to get over her cybernetics criticism but the Emperor’s look still haunted her. She had told Iko that she should take a skin grafting as she could no longer handle people gawking at her cybernetic body parts. Iko had denied calling how she was a symbol for all the cyborgs on Earth. Iko had shouted how her cybernetics was nothing to be ashamed of. Little did she know that she was not ashamed of her cybernetics, she regretted having them. She did not remember having a full body with cold and touch susceptibility, having eyes that could cry with tears of joy instead of notifications of increased secretions of hormones like dopamine, endorphin, oxytocin and serotonin. She could not remember how she had blushed, how color rose to her chubby cheeks when she giggled before she was burnt alive. She did not want to live in times like this. In times when memories of being a social outcast haunted her, when prejudices tried to drown her happiness.

Today was one such day. It was the Annual Peace Ball and she was invited by Torin. Not the Emperor but his royal advisor, maybe she had misjudged the Emperor’s hatred for her. She was happy that it was Torin at least he had not hated her for her being a cyborg however they were on more civil grounds now. Torin was not quite bothered about her abnormalities like the others and she was grateful for that. She was about to be announced and that’s when all the bitter memories came back. She could drown in her tears if she could cry. Iko had fretted about how she had to look pretty for the camera. She had no strength left to tell her that she was no longer the Queen that everyone wanted to please and take good pictures of. She missed Peony and that’s when the headache kicked in.

She was the Emperor's personal guest, this was what she had been told but so were the other leaders. The Emperor had not shared a single dance with her in the entire evening. While the Emperor was off welcoming dignified guests unlike a Cyborg Queen, she had danced with unwanted nobles but it was not out of their will, it was more for power and position and forced respect.

The Emperor was busy dancing with the pretty woman that he had been courting. Iko had told her before they had flown to Earth. She had a headache for the entire night. Of course why would the Emperor not live his life with love and happiness? It’s she who was having problems even after all those years.

She was dancing with Queen Camilla’s son when the announcement was done. The handsome Emperor had gone on his knee and asked his pretty lady. They both looked happy and Cinder could not take it anymore. The lady had said yes and the cheers had erupted all around.  Before she knew she was being hugged by someone, it was Iko, her dear and only friend.

“It’s okay.” She had whispered. She had excused herself from the crowd and left the ballroom. She could not stand watching the two lovers and the happy crowd around her. It was ‘not okay’ she had wanted to shout to Iko but her color changing eyes looked somewhere between dark blue and grey. She could not figure it out. If possible then Iko would have cried her eyes out but they could not cry and Cinder had never been so thankful to her synthetic eyes. She was an outcast all along. She was an outcast with power and titles but nothing else. The Emperor would have the cruel, evil and heartless Levana as his wife and Empress to protect his people but he would not give Cinder a chance to be friends with him. He would not give her a chance to tell him the truth. He would allow the year old prejudice to control their lives. He would never love her. He would never love a broken cyborg. He would never love someone as worthless as Cinder.

In the end even though a Queen, she was 36.28% not human whose heart had been shattered by the same boy again and again.  She was defeated in her own life. Darkness was taking over her. She had already shut her eyes and the only amount of light was from the newsfeed fitted in her eye showing the news of Emperor’s engagement besides the picture of His Majesty and his fiancée. With this thought she had become broken all over again. She allowed grieve to take over, she could be human in her dreams. 

The darkness consumed her, just like the flame once had.

 ___

To be Loved:

She was gasping for air when she woke up and then there was a bloody headache. Thankfully it had not been her screaming this time. It took a moment for her to realize her surroundings- She was in her personal chambers. She realized how it was just a nightmare. At first the only comfort that she got was from the hand around her waist. It was the Emperor's hand. No, it was Kai's. He was Kai for her and not the Emperor of the Eastern Commonwealth. Just Kai- her Kai.

She was trying to calm herself by taking deep breaths, trying to recall all the happy memories with Kai and her friends. That time when Kai had proposed and she had said yes, when she had married him. When Thorne had helped her pick a tiara or when Cress and her had pranked all the others or when Winter had explained her childhood as a 3 year old toddler on Luna. She had far too many happy memories; she would not allow the nightmare to consume her.

Recently, her nightmares had an edge of sadness to it. They were increasing in numbers. Each night was a struggle between reality and her dark thoughts. Hopefully, Kai was in a better condition. She had learnt a new function in her control panel when she had gone to meet Dr. Nandez. She could mute herself at times according to her needs. The mute function worked in her just like it did for an escort-droid. 

After the rebellion came to an end, she had been having trouble sleeping. She never was vocal about her abnormal sleeping patterns. Iko had just assumed it was her being a workaholic. The mute function had helped her quite well to hide her nightmares from everyone while she was in Luna but it was different in Eastern Commonwealth. After she had given up her throne and converted Luna into a republic, she had returned to Earth. Kai had proposed and they had married later. It was difficult to hide the fact that you were having nightmares when you shared the bed with someone. Kai had found out. He was having his own troubles sleeping. After much convincing on his part, Cinder had agreed to go into therapy. Kai and Cinder were into it together. He talked about his problems with her and that helped him, talking helped him. She kept her problems bottled up. Maybe that's why he was recovering better in comparison to her. She always felt that he had enough on his plate without her adding her sleep troubles. Her nightmares about her loved ones death, Levana and failed rebellion had stopped. They had changed from fear to that of guilt and betrayal. Sometimes it was Peony accusing her of contracting her with Letumosis other times it was Kai unable to look upon her because of her cybernetics.

The therapy had helped. She pretended to have nightmare-less nights but who was she playing games with. Kai had already caught her so many times however she could not open up about her fears like he had. Cinder had lived her entire life being neglected and unloved. It was difficult for her to come to terms with the fact that she had people who cared for her. She needed time and he gave that to her.

She did not remember sleeping on the bed. She was sitting by the window waiting for Kai to return from his meetings that was supposed to end already. She must have fallen asleep before he had returned. Realizing that she had been thinking for far too long she tried to sleep, her internal clock informed her that it was only 3 in the morning. Cinder tried sleeping, sheep-counting, she cuddled closer to Kai. It was a failed attempt. Sleep won't come while she kept thinking about the meetings she had with the world leaders, Kai's birthday gift, Iko's request to go shopping and Torin's thoughts on the new policy they had talked about earlier. Hence, she gave up and rolled herself out of bed without disturbing Kai. Thankfully, Kai was fast asleep today. Maybe his meeting with the palace staff was exhausting. It went up pretty late. 

Walking out into the balcony adjoining their chamber, she said, 'I'm fine.' Cool air helps you become calm at least that's what that rom-com which Kai saw said. It was the day of the new moon. Luna would not be visible today. Although she had spent little part of her life there, she felt somewhat attached to it. Luna and being Lunar was a part of her and she had learnt to embrace it despite the horrors that Luna had stricken Earth with. The cool air might have been helpful as it helped her keep thoughts of her nightmare at bay. She had once told herself for hours that Kai loved her. Even though she was a Lunar and a cyborg he truly loved her. She had seen it for herself not that she doubted it but a little reassuring is what she needed from time to time.

“Ah!”

“Shhh..it’s me “he whispered into her ear. 

Kai. He had hugged her from behind and maybe her audio-interface did not hear his footsteps or maybe she was just too deep in her thoughts to realize that he was awake. Kai was not as silent as a cat rather he announced his arrival like the Emperor that he is.

“You gave me a heart attack, ever heard of informing before hugging people in the middle of the night?”

“Have you heard that according to the facts people usually sleep at 3 in the morning?”

She dared not answer that. Why could she just not have snuggled up closer to him in the bed than he would have not realized that she was awake. Now she had woken him up and he would talk about her problems until they were solved. He would be missing his chances of sleeping just because of her. She mentally scolded herself.

“Nightmares?” he asked slowly.

She nodded. He did not say anything after this. They remained silent for a long time. Something must be wrong. It was unlike Kai to be silent for so long so she turned around. He looked visibly shaken himself.

“You too?” she asked. He nodded hesitantly.

“The same one?” He nodded again.

“It’s okay Kai. I am here with you.”

He opened his mouth to say something but shut it, took a minute to get his thoughts together and spoke, “I had woken up and you were not there so I got all riled up and started frantically looking for you and then I saw you here and - ”

Before he could complete his rant she hugged him tightly. He did not waste any time before his arms had found their rightful place around her waist. She felt better just being near him- Kai worked miraculously on her anxiety. If he was a medicine he would totally help everyone get over their nervousness. It was quite his charm. Thankfully Cinder had him all for herself well not entirely as he was the Emperor so the well-being of the people was more important than personal well-being.

“Kai, why have you brought the blanket with you?” she asked teasingly.

He looked sheepish now. "Well after I saw you in the balcony and may I add on a cold night. I thought it would be good to... you know take a blanket to comfort you- and me as well. I don't want you to think that you need comfort like I need it too ...and it's okay to find comfort in each other and I have seen that blankets are necessary for comfort on cold nights and I thought to bring it along and now I am not so sure about my decision...maybe now that I know better I should just go back to-"

“Yeah. I know Kai.” she said grinning, obviously making fun of him. Although the Emperor of Eastern Commonwealth, Kai stuttered a lot while expressing his feelings and it was fun to watch the perfect diplomat stumble over his words from time to time.

“You are so adorable when you ramble about things as silly as blankets.” 

“Stop making fun of me. I am your Emperor.”

“I am your wife Mr. Emperor. I can make jokes at your expense.”

“I don’t remember it being mentioned in the list of rights you possess either as an Empress or wife.”

“It’s an unwritten law dear husband.”

“Well I withdrew your authority from this specific unwritten law as the Emperor, my lady.”

Having these banters with Kai, made her day as the Empress a bit more tolerable. It made her forget all about her worries and critics. Kai brought out the best of her. Something she would have never discovered if not for him. Falling into a comfortable silence, they decided to sit down on the couch that they had kept in the balcony for midnight scenarios like this. She guessed he had fallen asleep till he asked the question she had been dreading about all this time.

“So?” he asked worriedly.

“So?” she mimicked.

“Were you going to tell me?” he asked, his brows knitting together.

“What?” She asked, confused.

“Your nightmares?” he asked.

She had really believed he had forgotten about it just like she had. She had this gut feeling that this conversation would not end up without her being broken. She had been avoiding this talk for long enough now hence she decided to speak before giving rise to more complications.

“Oh that! It was nothing Kai.”

“Oh so now that you are having a nightmare it is nothing?” he was annoyed at her if not disappointed.

“I don’t want to talk about it now. I am rather happy now.” She had a slight sensation of a headache coming. If Kai pressed further she would be on the verge of a mental breakdown.

“Didn’t we talk about this Cinder? We would help each other and now you are backing out. Keeping everything bottled up will not help and no matter how much you try to hide it from me I will know it Cinder. How about cutting the crap and talking about it already!”

Cinder wanted to escape from the balcony. She was not so afraid to speak out about her problems than she was of being more or less guilty that she had kept her problems hidden from him.

“Kai” she croaked. Her throat had gone dry with an itchy sensation in her thorat. She did not want to fight with Kai. He was the first person who had stood up for her despite her abnormalities and origin. She wanted comfort from him but without troubling him and telling her problems will obviously add to his troubles.

“Were you ever going to tell me Cinder?” he asked, almost accusingly.

She hesitantly shook my head, better tell him the bitter truth. Now he looked disappointed and even slightly furious. His hand tugged at his hair pulling them so that he would not lose his temper and make things worse for both of them.

“Why? I already had figured out that you were hiding the fact that you were having nightmares and suffering alone. The mute function cannot stop your body from going stiff every time you wake up gasping for breath. I wanted to help but you refused; denying the very fact that you were having nightmares.”

“I did not want to trouble you Kai. You already had enough to worry about without my nightmares. My nightmares are nothing compared to yours. I didn’t want to wake you up every night and snatch away your very little sleeping time. So sorry if I became self-sacrificing because I decided to suffer alone.“

“It’s okay to have nightmares and I disturb you all the time when I wake up screaming. You make me look weak after you decide to suffer alone and Cinder didn't we promise that we would be there for each other in sickness and health. I want to help you just like you do. Tell me if there is something wrong with it and I would correct myself. So you better tell me what nightmare you had that got you so shaken up? Speaking helps Cinder listen to me.” He half- yelled at her trying to make her understand it. 

We were yelling at each other and she could not help but be ashamed. Why does she have to be so heroic? to be the root cause of this fight.

“You wanna know what this was all about, right? Then let me tell you”, She was practically yelling as well. “I am scared of everything that happened to me. I am scared of how my life turned over night at the Annual Peace Ball, of how I went from being neglected to the Lunar Princess who was assumed dead for over a decade. I hate to say this but I am afraid that people will hate or maybe they hate me for being cyborg and the only reason they keep up with me is because I come from family who was full of power hungry tyrants or because I am married to you and insulting me will be like insulting the choices of the Emperor. My nightmares are about how you would turn out to hate me at that night of the Annual Peace Ball when Levana took me in custody or how Peony’s death is upon my head. Hell I am scared that you would stop loving me because I am a cyborg even though you have reassured me a thousand times that it is not relevant but Kai I am afraid of how fast my life has changed and it has not made me crazy yet which is quite surprising. I know you love me and believe me I love you too but all those people around me who hate me or when the reporters and someone who does not know me criticizes me it makes me question my worth. Selene is important to them, Cinder is worthless. I do not know how Selene was. I am just Cinder, the girl who came out of the lab under Michelle Benoit’s house. I am the person who is the ashes of the 3 year old complete Selene. I am what am left behind of her and that haunts me at times. You love something incomplete Kai and I appreciate you for that but when I am nervous I just realize that you could have any girl yet you choose broken Cinder and I can’t comprehend it Kai. I just can’t –“

Before she could say anything, Kai tackled her into a bone crushing hug. He had wrapped his hands around herso tightly that she felt vulnerable and protected at the same time. She was panting for breath and stars, she had just yelled at Kai who was trying to be helpful. Her retina scanner warned her about rapid heartbeats and how she might shut down if she did not calm herself. Her internal clock said that it was 4:00 am. She sends those messages away. She would not pass out with important matters at hand.

“I am sorry Kai. I should not have yelled but I just got carried away-” 

“Shh..be quiet.” 

She had a throbbing sensation in her head and stars she wanted to cry. In the end it was Kai who was crying. He was an emotional dork, that’s what Torin and Cinder called him. It just felt like he expressed all the emotions that had been taken away from her. He expressed both their feelings. He completed her broken self but she would not dare say this aloud. Iko and Thorne would tease her to the moon and back.

“Stars, Cinder I can’t believe you had so many things bottled up. It’s not good to keep it all in. I love you  and remember that no one can change it and let no one else tell you otherwise. ”

“I won’t mute myself from now on Kai. I promise.“she mumbled. 

He pressed his forehead against her and mumbled words of encouragement. Their breaths mixed in the spaces between them. Her heartbeat had risen again for an entirely different reason. His unkempt hair tickled her. Kai's presence and his faint smell of soap and fresh pages even when he had just been sleeping soothed her. Pressing her forehead against Kai, she realized that sometimes being brave is to open up about one's problem. It takes actual bravery to accept your problems than to run away from them. Kai and Cinder had survived the lunar rebellion; they could survive the post trauma of the it as well. Together they had saved the world, now it was time to save them before they were lost in pretending to be someone else that they were not- in pretending that they were fine when they were not. Maybe if she accepted his help like he had, they could heal each other. Something good really came out of this conversation. He loved her, cyborg or not. 36.8% Human or not, he will always love her.

Thinking about this, she said,” I am in love with you Kai.” And then she closed the distance between them feeling peaceful. 

 _x_

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[seeing-the-light]

TTS Gen Week Day 3: Protection

Note: Yes, I know this was yesterday’s prompt, I just ended up being too tired to finish it yesterday but I really liked where it was going, so here we are! Thanks @purplespacefairy for organizing this!

Something More Important Read on AO3

Edmund was upset, because today was supposed to have been special.

And it’d started off well enough. Ever since he’d informed the royal family in Corona that his son’s real birthday was approaching, they’d been nothing but willing to help him create the proper celebration. He could tell that their friend’s betrayal had been hard on Eugene and Rapunzel, but though it still cast shadows over everything, he could tell they were beginning to heal. That’d heartened him, particularly since he knew how far they’d come since it first happened. 

That moment when his son had stepped into the room, with shock that turned to confusion… for a moment, he could imagine what it might’ve been like to something like this for him every year, growing up, if they’d been together. He felt something warm bloom in his chest as Eugene looked to him for confirmation, even then – for a moment, they felt like a child’s eyes. He made his way in and looked around with a child’s excitement and wonder – and though Edmund was happy to see it, he couldn’t help being stabbed with guilt. Maybe he could’ve tried harder, maybe he could’ve sent his son something every year just so he knew he was remembered, even if that could’ve been dangerous and attracted unwanted attention. If only he’d-

A cold gust of wind had run through the room, then, startling him out of his thoughts. He didn’t have to look to recognize the aura of the moonstone. “Swell party,” She’d smirked. “I’m guessing my invitation got lost in the mail.” It’s not my kingdom, He’d had to remind himself, adamantly, as she entered the room, dragging Adira’s blade across the floor. Cassandra didn’t deserve to be holding that blade. He was a guest here, this wasn’t his castle, which meant he had to defer to the royal family’s judgement, even if a part of him wanted to strike her down the moment she entered for having the audacity to use this moment, this moment that was supposed to be special and his first chance he had to celebrate a birthday with his son, to engage in her sick drama. The anger only rumbled deeper, and stronger, when she patronized the princess, and called his son an ex-convict and a loser.

He noticed his son only corrected the ex-convict part, and that hurt Edmund in a way he couldn’t quite explain.

After she left, the whole atmosphere had changed. No one wanted to celebrate anymore, with her threat looming over them. And before he had the chance to say much of anything, Eugene and his friends had already whisked out of the room, likely to decide what their next move was. 

He couldn’t help feeling a twinge of regret. He wanted to be a part of his son’s life, especially on a day like this, but the last thing he wanted was to accidentally do something that’d push him further away. He didn’t think he could bear making any more mistakes, not when this was such a delicate situation and his son had finally started talking to him enough that he’d had to be careful not to mention this surprise birthday to him beforehand. 

So he waited. In fact, the next he heard from any of them, it was when the dispirited couple was walking through the castle’s hallways, on the way towards their bedrooms. “What happened, son?”

Eugene glanced over at Rapunzel, before looking back at his dad. “She took him.” He sounded defeated.

“Took who?” Edmund said, brow furrowing, concern entering his eyes. He didn’t have to ask who she was.

Eugene sighed, running a hand over his hair, but it was Rapunzel who answered. “Varian. He was translating the scroll, and we thought…“ Her voice trailed off, lapsing into silence.

Quirin’s son. “Then we must go after them at once!”

“We?” Eugene said, at the same time as Rapunzel said “See?” She crossed her arms. “He agrees with me.”

“You can’t be serious, son.” Edmund said, looking at both of them. “You said it yourself, earlier- with the scroll, and the moonstone, she could-“

Eugene looked at Rapunzel again, more out of concern than anything else – but she didn’t seem to be overly affected by the remark.  Then, he gave another sigh, “Listen, Dad… can we talk about this?” The implication was clear. Alone.

Edmund was silent for a moment, unsure whether he’d pressed too far, but then he nodded. (And maybe it wasn’t important, given the current circumstances, but he couldn’t help thinking of a time when Eugene could hardly stand being in the same room as him.) “Of course.”

As he waited, Eugene squeezed Rapunzel’s hand and leaned forward to plant a kiss on her forehead. “Goodnight, Sunshine. I’ll be by, later.”

Despite everything, Rapunzel smiled back. For a moment, the ring she hadn’t gotten to pull out weighed heavily in her bag.  “Happy Birthday, Eugene.”

With that, she moved down the hall to go up to her own bedroom. Eugene’s gaze lingered on her until she disappeared from view, before turning back to his dad.

“I’m sorry if I’m-“

“No, it’s fine.” Eugene said, putting his hands in his pockets, before turning to walk towards his room. “This is important.”

“I agree.” Edmund swallowed, before walking to keep pace with him. “All I’m saying is that you already know exactly how powerful it is, if she has the ability to harness its full potential-“

“But we don’t even know where she is.” He cut in, half because he just didn’t want his dad to start detailing everything CassAHNdra could possibly do, right now. He wasn’t sure if he could handle it. “It’s dark, and in the woods, there’s no telling what we might run into- look, I don’t feel good about leaving her with all of that power and Varian, either, but what she did today-“

“What did she do today?” Edmund asked, in a quieter tone. By now, they’d reached the door to his bedroom.

“Kicked me down a flight of stairs, for one.” Eugene muttered, as they entered, closing the door behind them. He found himself continuing before he could stop himself- and once he’d started, he found he didn’t want to stop. “Almost ran me over with a giant ball. Almost brought a giant metal machine down on us while I was dangling over a drop while holding onto a horse’s legs. So you know-“ He forced out a wry chuckle, trying to hide just how shaken he felt. “A normal Tuesday. And that part was just Lance and Max and I, Varian is-“

Cassandra had taken him. Now, there was no telling where she was. And he suspected that Varian wouldn’t just tell her what she wanted to know, which meant-

Which meant the kid was in a whole lot of danger.

Eugene looked out the window. He’d never admit it aloud, but he didn’t think he’d been properly scared of what lengths Cassandra might go to in order to get her way before today. The person who’d faced him hadn’t been his friend- it was someone who had no qualms about using his life as a pawn in her game.

Well, at least it wasn’t his first time in that situation.

Edmund’s eyes hardened as Eugene relayed this series of events. “I’m sorry all of that happened.” Maybe, if he’d insisted on being there instead of waiting here, he could’ve-

“Dad.” Eugene said, looking back at him. “You were saying your thoughts aloud again.” By now, he’d crossed his arms, but the way he was looking at Edmund... it seemed almost vaguely confused by the sentiment.

“Sorry.” Edmund responded. He only hesitated briefly, before continuing. “But if you go tomorrow, you must let me come along with you.”

“You?” If anything, the confusion only seemed to have grown. “No, it should be Rapunzel and Lance and I, if anything- the less people who are at risk, the better.”

“The less people you have, the easier it will be for her to overpower you.” Edmund pointed out.

Eugene shook his head, and for a moment, Edmund caught a glimmer of the same conviction that’d swayed him from what he’d thought was his purpose for decades. “I’m sure Rapunzel can take her.”

“You have to agree, though, that having someone else along couldn’t possibly-“

“Look, I’m touched. But we’ll be fine.”

“And what if you’re not-“

“Dad,” Eugene said, resisting the urge to sigh for the third time and trying to keep his frustration at bay. “I get that you’re upset because Cassandra stole the moonstone and you-“ 

”This isn’t about the moonstone, son.” Edmund said, in a low tone. Eugene must’ve looked confused – he was so sure he’d understood exactly what was bothering his father – because then the older man looked at him more directly, and said in an even quieter tone. “It’s about you.” 

Eugene blinked at him, stunned into silence at that statement. He didn’t know how to respond. People had tended to get upset at him time and time again throughout his life, but upset on his behalf? He hadn’t really encountered that until... well, Rapunzel. Which was much different from this. And his father had dedicated his life to protecting the moonstone, so he’d just assumed... 

Well, he’d definitely been quiet for too long. It was time to fill the silence with something witty, like he usually did. Something intelligent, that’d distract him from whatever the hell this new emotion he was feeling was.

”...What?” He found himself saying instead, stupidly.

“It’s about you.” Edmund repeated, still holding his gaze. 

Eugene blinked again, processing this, “…what,” He swallowed, realizing he was about to sound like an idiot again. “What do you mean? I mean, the moonstone is-“

“I lost everything because of the moonstone, son!” Edmund said abruptly, in rare burst of strong emotion. Eugene barely kept from flinching, startled by its force, even if he was equally surprised to realize he didn’t quite mind it. It didn’t scare him the way it had when they’d first met, at least. “In a different way from how she has.” Edmund continued, more softly, leaving no doubt as to who she was. “And now that ... something has brought us together again, whether you want to call it destiny or happenstance, I don’t want to-“ He gave a deep sigh, no longer meeting Eugene’s gaze. “I could not bear it happening a second time.”

You’re the reason it happened at all. He wanted to retort, but something held him back. The sentiment his dad was expressing seemed so... genuine and vulnerable, he wasn’t sure he had the heart to shoot it down, even if a part of him was still angry.

“And when she was saying all those things about you and your friends, I wanted to-“ Edmund’s hand clenched into a fist, taking the silence as an opportunity to continue. “You are many things, son, and I admit I don’t know what all of them are, and that is my fault. The weight of that decision is mine to bear for the rest of my life.” His voice was tinged with deep regret, as he finally raised his head to meet his son’s gaze again. “But a loser isn’t one of them. A loser would not manage to rise every time he was knocked down. A loser would not go out of his way to help even those who have wronged him. If being here has shown me anything, it’s how vibrant a life you’ve built for yourself, and how deep the connections you’ve forged run. Everyone practically jumped at the chance to throw you a party, after I-”

“...the party was your idea?” Eugene asked, in a small voice. Everything else he’d said was too overwhelming to process, right now, especially when he wasn’t properly sure how he even felt about the man standing in front of him. Besides, anything more, and his voice might start shaking, and the stinging in his eyes might turn into something more. He couldn’t afford that right now, even as he wondered at how... much it warmed him to be seen by someone relatively new to him.

“Well, Rapunzel took the idea and ran with it, of course.” He said, a somewhat endeared smile crossing his face.

“Of-of course.” Eugene realized he hadn’t been breathing, and released one, relaxing a little and unable to keep from giving a small smile. She had a way of doing that.

“But I wanted to commemorate this day in some way. So you could see that you are important - and to so many people, too.” His brow furrowed in frustration. “And then she-”

“That wasn’t your fault.” Eugene said, before he could continue. He wasn’t even sure why he said it, just knew that that wasn’t something he wanted his dad to blame himself for. Especially not after...all that. “Look, I’ll admit that I haven’t forgiven you for what you did, and what that meant for me growing up.” Rather than saying anything in protest, Edmund just nodded, bowing his head. Eugene swallowed, before reaching forward to put a hand on his father’s left shoulder. Edmund met his gaze. “But you’re trying, which is more than a lot of people would do. I can see that. And that still... means something.”

Edmund held his gaze for a long moment. To be honest, Eugene wasn’t quite sure what he was looking for, in there. But then, without warning, he felt himself yanked into a strong hug. He gave a (very manly) yelp.

Edmund froze. “You’re injured. I didn’t even think about that, are you-”

Eugene’s breath had caught in his chest, but as it released, it bubbled forth in a laugh. “I’m fine, Dad. Just warn me next time.”

Edmund pulled him closer in relief (though more gently). “I make no promises.”

He gave a smaller chuckle in response to that, but just relaxed into the hug, in lieu of giving an actual response.

Edmund smiled. There was a long journey ahead, but every step was taking them somewhere, and it was more than worth it. For now, he was just glad to have this moment.

“Happy birthday, son.”

[gisellefaina]

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[oingo233]

If It Hurts

Summary: A run goes terribly wrong and Daryl, wounded, must depend on you to get the two of you out.  But will the threat be more than you and the group can handle?  

Daryl Dixon x Reader

Authors Note: This is for Ria’s writing challenge. @im-a-writer-right​. I hope this turned out alright, I enjoyed writing it!  Also the prompts are in bold.

Warnings: Violence, Gore, unwanted sexual comments(not smutty), cussing, and a whole lots of angst which was actually unintentional and just happened, but now I’m crying at 12 in the morning.  Death, and changing POV’s.

Word Count: 4k...oops.

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A song played softly from the trucks radio as Rick, Carol and you hum along.  Glenn and Maggie are seated in the back of the truck with the bags you’ll all set out with when you get to your destination.  You were about an hour or two from the prison, out on a supply run.  Daryl found a small, deserted town and thought it would be a good idea to look for supplies there.  We were low on medicine and food, hoping to find that and whatever else you could, if we were lucky we’d find seeds too.  

Your window was rolled down and you stuck your arm out of it, spreading your fingers and letting the wind caress your hand.  After the world went to shit, you learned to enjoy the little things, life was too short not to.  You shiver as Daryl glances back at you all, smiling at the way your hand was lazily out of the car, you gave him a small wave and he revved up his engine in acknowledgment. Carol and Rick share a look which you don’t bother to make a snarky comment about, these happy moments were fleeting and you weren’t going to ruin the mood.

You knew the truth, and accepted it long ago.  You loved Daryl, an overwhelming amount at times, and he loved you too.  But in a way that you weren’t sure if he was just being friendly or not. So you kept quite, and decided that just being around him was good enough for you.  You have known Daryl since before y’all found Ricks group. He saved you from a group of walkers that killed your friend, you were devastated and scared of being alone.  He took you in, well, you followed him for three days until he let you join him begrudgingly.  He says he only kept ya around for walker bait if he’d ever need it.  But you knew this wasn’t the truth.

You were the person closest to Daryl, able to understand him and him you.  You were always the first one to ease a smile out of him, or the first to piss him off. Daryl was the one person, who if he was by your side, you always felt better about the world you all lived in today. 

The easiness of the day filled your heart with joy, and you hollered out the window, letting the wind carry your voice else where.  Everyone in the truck chuckled, but up ahead Daryl sped up and screamed into the window with you.  Rick sped up too, laughing.  Everyone knew that no walker could touch you at this speed.  

Soon, you all arrived at the destination.  Glenn and Maggie climbed out of the truck, engaged in a conversation. You sneak a glance at the couple, and internally cooed at the way Glenn was looking at Maggie.  As if she was the world.  You watched as Daryl approached the group and wondered if you looked at him that way.  He caught you staring and winked, you ignore your blush and push forwards some confidence.

“Miss me?”  You call out to his approaching figure.  He shrugs off his crossbow and gives you a pointed look.

“Nah, I was just thinkin’ bout how quite it was without ya, until ya screamed out to the fuckin’ wind.”  He feigned annoyance at first, then looked back at you with a slight smile.  You roll your eyes, and bring your hand to your mouth, pretending to zip it up.  He was the one to roll his eyes now as he walks past you towards Carol to retrieve a bag from her.  She was handing them out from the back of the truck, and when Daryl came back he threw one at you.  You caught it with a tight smile. Nearly hit your damn face.  

Everyone was quite as Rick explained the plan.  “We move as a unit, no one needs to get hurt today.  Last time we checked this place is was uninhabited, but watch out for walkers.  It’s a big town so lets not split up...unless we need the time.  Alright.”  He frees his gun from the holster and holds it out infront of him.  

“Thought you said it was uninhabited.”  Glenn said, Rick glanced back at him.

“I also said ‘last time’.” Rick replies, Carol chimed in with a warm smile.  Seems I wasn’t the only one enjoying the day.

“Nothing wrong with being careful.” She says, pulling out her own gun and following Rick towards the first store.  Glenn and Maggie move infront of you and then Daryl pulls out his crossbow and nudges you to move forward.  You push him back a bit before walking forward, you don’t need to see him to know the massive eyeroll he just pulled.  

It was only out in the open like this, with people he trusted and loved that he was comfortable.  Back at the prison, with all the new arrivals, Daryl was closed off and distant from a lot of people.  Some might even call him brooding.

You guys made it through three separate stores before everything went to shit, and just like that the peaceful day turned into a living nightmare.

You were walking the sidewalk with Maggie, keeping watch while the others cleared out the inside of the fourth building.  You heard Daryl whistle letting you know it was all clear, when the first shot rang out.  Everything felt slow as you sprinted around the side of the building, covering yourself.  You looked around for the source of the sound, but saw no one.  You saw no one.  You were filled with dread as you realized you were all alone.  Maggie must have ran inside the store, instead of to the corner of it, out in the open...god how could you be such a dumbass. 

You put a hand over your mouth and pushed further against the wall as you heard footsteps.  They echoed against the eerie silence in the town, horror filled you as you counted numerous steps all at once.  There was a group of hostile survivors, and you were alone with a pistol and an axe.  You tried to fill yourself with positive thoughts, reminding yourself that you’re a badass.  You could take them, easy...

“Come on out, pretty thing.”  A deep voice rumbled out, the sound filled your body with queasiness.  “I’d like to run a number on you...”He let out a loud wolf whistle and you heard a shuffle from inside the store, before it fell deathly silent again.  Only the sounds of footsteps getting closer and closer.

“C’mon, we just want one of ya.  Though we’d take two given the chance.” Obnoxious laughter rings out before a new, younger voice speaks up. 

“Pretty girls are hard to find now a days.  Why don’t you be nice and come out for us.  We’ll treat ya for it.”  The laughter sounded again, and this time it was closer.  You gripped your pistol tighter, finger rigid on the trigger.  Then a loud sound came from inside the store, yelling and crashing.  

“Daryl no!”  It was Carols voice, and you swear you heard Rick telling him to wait.  But it was too late, your heart stopped at the thought of Daryl getting hurt.  The footsteps fade away from you and towards the entrance of the door. Through the commotion you heard the whiz of a crossbows bolt.  A loud groan rang out and your heart gave out, until you heard another bolt and some gunshots.  

You stepped out from the corner only to be dragged away as more gunshots rang out.  You scream out and fight to get away, but the strong arm was unmoving from your waist.  You were dragged into the nearest store, you looked around at the unfamiliar surrounding and noticed it was one you haven’t checked yet.  You scream louder, hoping someone from your group would hear you.  “Shut it, girl.”  The hand moved from your waist and you spun around to see Daryl.  His crossbow in one hand, and the one previously wrapped around your waist was hugging his own.  

“Daryl...”You breathe out.  You felt more relieved than you should considering the still risky situation you were in.  “I thought...”Your eyes water and you pull Daryl into your chest for a tight hug.  He stiffens for a moment before hugging you with one arm, the crossbow digging into your shoulder but you didn’t care.  He tucks his head away in the crook of your neck, his lips part and you feel his hot breath roll down your neck and shoulder. 

“I know.  Me too.”  He grunts out, his voice rougher than usual.  You pull away confused.  You feel a strange wetness against your side and look down to see your shirt covered in blood, but it wasn’t your own.  At a shocking speed you look at Daryls stomach to see him holding his side, blooding leaking through his fingers.  

Your chest heaves and constricts at the sight.  His shirt dripped blood every few seconds and his shirt seemed to be just a red puddle against his waist.  You blink back tears and grab Daryls shoulder, not able to look him in the eye.  He was hurt because of you...

“Lie down.”  You say stiffly.  He grunts out and tries to move towards the door and the chorus of gunshots and fighting outside.

“M’ fine.  We need to go.  Ain’t safe.”  You take his other shoulder and meet his stare.  

“Lie down.”  You say softly.  He only stares at you.  Your heart beats even faster and your primal fear of losing him kicks in.  You were losing too much time, he was losing too much time and too much blood.  “Daryl, lie the fuck down and let me help you.  Please.”  He lets you grab the crossbow from his hand and lightly set it down, his hand was sticky with blood.  But he doesn’t lie down, he looks behind you towards the window where we can see Rick duck behind a car after firing another round at these dangerous strangers.

  He looks back down at you, ready to say another thing about leaving, but his words fall short as he sees tears stream down your face.  You roughly wipe them away.  With one last look at you, and an agonized groan, Daryl laid down.  Before he fell back completely you stopped him.  

“On your side, I need to see if there is an exit wound.”  Daryl stared at you a while longer, you’ve only seen his scars once and it turned into a fight.  He couldn’t look at you for days after.    “Please, Daryl I can’t lose you.  You don’t get to die today because you’re a stubborn asshole.” You beg. He tucks his head under his arm and avoids your eyes as he turns on his side. You wipe at more tears furiously as he waits for you to look at him in disgust.  You remind yourself to talk to him about this later, as you see the distant and uncomfortable expression he wears, glaring at the shelf across from him.  You weren’t sure if it was the gunshot wound, or this moment you two were about to relive that made him act this way.  

“May I look?”  You ask him softly, knowing that either way you were going to, but you knew he’d appreciate it.  He nods slowly, taking a deep breath not unnoticed by you.  You kneel down and replace his hand apply pressure with your own, smaller one, his fingers retracted slightly from you, before he placed his shaking hand on top of yours. Softly you lift the fabric up his back.  He winces slightly.  A sigh of relief escapes your lips as you see that right above his hip, there was a gaping hole.  An exit wound, and it didn’t seem to be in a critical place.  You quickly stole a look at his scars, it was unintentional but filled your heart with even more love for the man. He was strong, and he would survive this...he had to.  

But his skin felt feverish, and you looked at his face to find him shockingly pale.  You only then noticed the small puddle of blood forming around your knees. You quickly push his hand down on the wound again and let your hand apply pressure to the exit wound, a small sob escaping your lips.

“That bad huh?”  He grunts out.  You control your breathing, refusing to lose control and let him die.  You quickly grab a shirt from the nearest rack and press it against the wound.

“Stay here.” You say, deciding on a plan.  His head whips to yours, and he groans out in pain, eyes fluttering dangerously.  

“You ain’t leaving.”He demands.

“Well, you ain’t dying.  I’ll be back before you know it.”  You offer him a soft smile before kissing his temple, and running out the door.  Lips burning. You ignore his shouts as you open the door, and burst out onto the battlefield.  Your group hidden behind cars, you feared the body count and pain you’d all carry after today. With Daryl in the condition he was in, your heart couldn’t stand the thought of any of your make shift family members dead.  Rick catches your eye, and you notice his expression falter at the sight of all the blood on you.  “Daryl.”  You mouth to him.  “Cover me.”  He swallows his emotions and nods to you.  Getting the attention of everyone as you run towards the store you saw needles in, and left your bag in, which had some alcohol in it.

Daryl’s POV

Daryl keeps his eyes trained on (Y/N) for as far as he can see through the broken window.  His side crippled with pain, and every time his eyes unfocused a bit more he’d be struck with a wave of hopelessness.  Is that was dying feels like?  Well, ain’t a bad way to go, he thought, taking the bullet for someone you love.  His thoughts turn bitter as he glances out the window, anxiety crushing his lungs.  Only for ‘er to fucking run out and kill ‘erself.  

“(Y/N)” He called once more. He listened for your sweet voice, hoping to hear you say some smartass thing.  Hoping he wouldn’t die alone.  

“(Y/N)!” He croaked out once more.  He didn’t care if he was being too loud, he was scared, he’d never say it out loud, but he was.  His heart sighed as he heard shuffled footsteps.  Ready to tell you off for being reckless.  But as he glanced over his shoulder he was met with the sagging, bloody face of the undead.  

Despite his pain he uses his feet to push himself backwards up against a cold metal shelf, empty of food.  A low moan left the walkers mouth and Daryl reached for his crossbow a few feet away.  He couldn’t reach it.  Daryl gritted his teeth and overeached, he fell on his shot side and yelled out in pain.  A new rush of blood pushes past the fabric of the two shirts.  

With a weak, trembling hand he shot the walker in the shoulder.  He gritted his teeth, still on his side, and shot the walker again, this time, through the head.  The walker fell to the floor not too far from him.  Daryl stared in it’s shallow eyes, wondering if that’ll be him soon.  It sure felt like it.  He lays and stares at the walker when he noticed something wrong.  It was silent.

No more gunshots, or yells.  No more fighting. He propped himself up on his elbow painfully, and glanced out the window.  What he saw made his heart drop.  He gripped his crossbow tighter, and struggled to get up.  But he just collapsed back in a puddle of his own blood.

“We got the girl.”  A man was holding you by the hair with one hand, and holding a knife to your throat with the other.  He rubbed his graying beard against the side of your face in lustful affection. “Just the one I was hoping for too.”  The men behind him that were still alive chuckled. Daryl let out a growl worst then the walkers and tried to aim his crossbow at the man whose arms you were squirming in.  Arms you were hurtin’ in, he thought.  But even a fool knew the bolt would fall short.

Daryl felt like he was drowning in cold sweat and blood, the crossbow slipped from his hand.  

“You let us walk away safely, and we won’t kill her.” The man says. Rick stood from behind the car, holding his weapon free hands in the air, a sign of surrender, but Daryl saw the strategy, or at least hoped there was one.

“Give us the girl, and no one gets hurt.” Rick says.

“Don’t you fuckin’ move.”  The guy yells, firming his grip on (Y/N)’s hair making her hands fly to his wrist.  He shakes her hands off of him and throws her to the ground.  He pulls out his gun and aims it at her head. “Don’t move...”

Rick stopped walking.  Daryl wanted to shout for him to kill the fucker, or better yet he wish he could do it himself.  But he was starting to feel weaker and weaker, until his legs were near numb and he couldn’t get up despite how much he struggled.  He could die, but he could never watch you die.  He closed his heavy eyes, giving into his tiredness as he hears a gunshot ring out. It echoes in his head long after it is silent.  He didn’t want to look, his heart heavy, and even if he wanted to, he couldn’t.  He couldn’t feel a thing.

*****

Daryl was rocking.  Like a baby in a mothers arms, he was being tossed around.  But how?  Where was he?  His eyes opened briefly before closing, the sun was never this bright before.  He wasn’t sure why, but he called your name.

As if an angel answered, he heard your voice.  “I’m here Daryl.  God, please wake up.  I’m here!”  You sounded more upset than he has ever heard you.  Were you in danger?  

“(Y/N)?”  He calls out again.  As his haze begins to fade, the confusion is filled with pain.  A loud, gritty moan of agony left his lips as his side withers with pain.   How did he get shot?  The question was fleeting as everything in the last 2 hours came back to him.  Survivors, the group attacked, (Y/N) shot.  But how were you here?  

“The men?” He asks.  He felt a clammy hand caress his cheek.  

“They’re dead.”  It was Carol’s shaky voice.

Someone was prodding at his gunshot wound, the pain worse than ever before.  He pushed the hand away only for it to return with more force.  His eyes shot open, and he caught himself staring at your face.  His pain became less relevant as he took in yours.  His hand instinctively reached to trace the fresh black eye you had, his fingers fell down to your busted lip.  Groggily he pulled on your lip, seeing that the cut ran deep inside your mouth. You faltered in your movement and looked at him, leaning into his touch. He pulls away as everywhere his hand touched, a trial of his blood was left.  You looked into his eyes, the redness and panic in them scared Daryl.  

Daryl looked around, Carol and Maggie were crouched down beside him, both looked like they were holding back tears.  Daryl’s hand fell next to (Y/N)’s knee and he felt the familiar truck underneath them.  Daryl was rocking like a baby, because Rick was driving like a mad man to get to the prison.

Daryl looked back at you but his expression turned sour as an overwhelming amount of pain reached all the way up from his side.  He glanced down to see your hands soaked in blood, between your shaking fingers was a threaded needle.  He closed his eyes as you pulled the needle through his side again to bring the skin back together.  He didn’t want to watch, instead he opened his eyes again and kept them on you even if you weren’t looking back. He couldn’t keep his pain a secret anymore no matter how hard he tried, another cry falling from his lips.

Your lips pucker out and another tear falls from your puffy eyes.  You stop for a second and look down at him.  Daryl catches his breath. Right now he just saw and felt you, a little broken, but you made him feel good, at peace.  You made the pain bearable as you softly pull back his hair from his sticky forehead. It took him a while until he realized you were speaking.

“...Daryl, this is going to be uncomfortable but it needs to be done.  If it hurts...”Your words falter and you bite your lip, holding back a sob.  Hurting him was the last thing you wanted to do, but you knew there was no line you wouldn’t cross to save him.  “...Just take me by hand and hold me tight.  It’ll all be over soon.”  He stared at you expressionless, feeling like he was in a fever dream.  Maybe he was, and maybe you were actually dead.  The thought alone caused him terrible pain and he closed his eyes, nodding to you.  He opened them and reached for your bloody hand.  His grip was weak, but his fingers gripped onto with all he had at the moment and it gave you the strength to carry on.  You use the thin thread you pulled out of your shirt in a quick compromise, to stitch his wound shut.  Praying the bleeding would cease.  His grip grew tighter as the process dragged on, stitching was harder with one hand.  His eyes found your soft lips, and he found himself wanting nothing more than to finally kiss them.  He was a fool, he thinks, a fool to let you pass him by. He gave your hand one last squeeze before he closes his eyes for the last time, thinking of you.

Your POV

You finished the last stitch and stared hesitantly at the job you have done, Hershel would have done better.  Maggie, who was watching with a horrified expression, cut the thread with her knife and gave you a weak smile.  Carol was caressing Daryl’s head, her fingers running through his hair, either to calm him down, or herself.  Daryl gave your hand a tight, long squeeze, causing you to smile down at him.  But his hand soon fell limp, and his eyes fluttered closed.  Carol whimpers and grabbed his face, desperate not to lose another person she loves.  

“Daryl...” She sobs out.  His eyebrows weren’t tight in a knot, or raised sassily up, he wasn’t frowning, and he didn’t look troubled.  He didn’t look alive.  With a shaky breath you call his name, again and again you scream at him.  You can’t hear as Maggie yells for the prison gates to be open, or as Rick shouts out for Hershel.  

You gather Daryls hand and hold it tight against your chest, your tears running down his forearm as you make his hand cradle your cheek. Your tears leave his hands a little cleaner than before, and you hope that if there is a heaven that he’ll be allowed in, even with all the blood on his hands and the things he has done.  You push your face further into his hands, gripping them with your own and missing the warmth he gave you just seconds ago.

“Daryl...” Your voice leaves you, as Hershel, Rick and Glenn drag Daryls body to the medical cell block.  You claw at Carols arms wrapped around your waist, her face tucked into your neck, crying.  Maggie holds you both, her burning eyes following Daryl’s body through the field, and the bloody trail that follows.

You sat outside of that cellblock for hours that day, knowing the truth.  It was void of life.  You heard hours earlier as Rick sobbed, driving the knife through his head.  Daryl, your Daryl, wouldn’t ever wake up.

[sweet-xoxo-thatcares]

I have ptsd back pain and pain in my right shoulder whenever I'm reminded of the painful moments, out of body experiences where JA hurt me while being vulnerable sexually, emotionally, mentally. I hate that it's close to the spot where my back sprained from falling backwards and catching myself on the steps that night from that fight with mom. Jay hit me with that umbrella higher than that spot, and now they're connected.

Even the times they abandoned me and left me on read, blocked me for months and I had to deal with hallucinations and insomnia, as if jaiden (their little alter identity) would come into my room in the middle of the night to help me sleep. I knew something had to be wrong for all this to come after being heart broken and treated so badly. The emotional abuse and the sexual abuse of boundaries and respect, the being made fun of, pulled back in to be used, then just leaving me again for somebody uglier and meaner than me.

These idiots have no idea and they don't care. And I wish I could pass all that unwanted ptsd back pain, stress, and reminders and memories that I have so they would know exactly how it feels to be the one they tortured for so long, on and off, going back and forth making me the bad guy to when I would pop off cause I had enough of being treated like shit. Like no normal human being with emotions wouldn't have tried to kick both of their asses either. And I'm sick of my dad looking at me crazy that I'm still upset about a bitch that broke my heart, took my money, and gave more to the dumb fat, ugly, rude bitch they were escaping from and cheating on.

I wish they knew how it feels to come home after a long day of work only to find yourself uncontrollable breathing, shaking, paranoid, sad, angry, frustrated, having a panic attack because some other bitch reminded me of them on tinder, so now I can't even dare date any new girls to move on from them.

My trust issues and intimacy scars are still there, strong in fold because of Jay and Ayunna. And I want consequences for both. I want them charged, fucked up in the face, beat till they can't fucking breathe, beat in the same spots in my back and my chest the exact same spots I feel those ptsd burns and pains.

I want them to burn just like they did me.

And it's stupid and senseless how they think they should even be claimed the victim and charge me with harassment to where I could go to jail and I didn't even touch them. I sent texts. So you're telling me my words hurt you that bad, you felt that threatened like a scared little fucking Karen, to get the cops called on me to take me to jail over some fucking texts?

Are you out of your fucking mind??? And you did even more worse shit to me??!! Bitch I can have yo ass go to jail for fraud, stealing money, and clothes from Walmart, and sexual assault, and fucking battery for punching me in my fucking leg because you thought it was funny. You had the audacity to ask me for my bank account numbers when I was drunk to where I couldn't even walk straight, same way you did when you hit me on my back when I could barely walk because you dares me to get high off of the whole blunt, you didn't care. Couldn't even defend myself because I was cross high...and you didn't even ask me for permission on some stupid bdsm shit.

Fucking hate yo black ass and the bitch that you with, still enabling you. Making me think I'm paranoid because I said I'm scared and I wanna leave. Yall made me think everything I did was wrong, and yall were entitled to gaslight me, humiliate me, and guilt trip into saying sorry for my reactions to being miserable and being mistreated, for even just walking out on yall when yall didn't even deserve shit from me.

Yall just wanted to control me, control my self esteem, control how I thought and how I felt about yall, just so you could torture me more for your stupid, sadistic, abusive sex toy, sex slave game. And I'm through with it. I hope the next bitch is smarter enough to catch on quicker and throw yall in jail, call the cops on yall. Let's see how you like being abused like that in there, you wouldn't like it if somebody did it to you, but you still do it to other people, then want to tag team the victim as if I'm in the wrong for being in pain. The pain that you started and brought up, cause yall got shit to deal with. Yo own daddy beat you till you got a cracked skull, so now you think its ok to beat me, because you still hurt by him?

LOOK IN THE FUCKING MIRROR JOCELYN YOU DOING IT JUST LIKE HIM!

FOLLOW IN YOUR DADDY FOOTSTEPS AND SEE WHERE IT GETS YOU.

I DONT CARE ABOUT THAT DUMB BITCH IN THE WHEELCHAIR THAT WHOOPED YO ASS TOO. SOUND LIKE YOU NEED TO HEAL FROM ALL THOSE FUCKING DEMONS INSTEAD TAKING ADVANTAGE OF GIRLS JUST LIKE ME AND THE OLD YOU.

YOU SUCK AT REDEEMING YOURSELF AND HAVE THE BALLS TO POINT THE FINGER AT ME WHEN I DIDN'T DO NOTHING BUT USE MY WORDS.

YOU THE BITCH THAT LIKE PUTTING YOUR HANDS ON WOMEN, CALLING US BITCHES, AND SLUTS, AND DEGRADING THEM JUST BECAUSE "oH iM tRaNs. I dOnT hAvE tO respect women."

You think you can push us around, tell us to bend over so you can penetrate us dry till we bleed, because you don't give a fuck about pleasing women either as a partner. No wonder ayunna asked me to fuck her. You don't like giving head, foreplay, boobs, none of that shit, but just torture it. Torture all of it.

You don't know how to be intimate, only abuse them and make fun of them. You're a tormenter and you'll always be like that. You don't even know how to make love to your soon to be wife, and it's been 2yrs and yall still engaged...the fuck who waits that long to be engaged and still sleeping with other ppl separately. Yall stupid, ignorant asses. Don't know nothing about sex, pleasing a woman, and making love.

No wonder yall separating everything. Even bought your own cats individually. Don't even know how to share or cooperate with other ppl. So damn controlling, you want other people to follow your damn orders with no input, no compromise. Like a fucking tyrant. It's your highway to hell. Lie in it. Die in it. I don't care. But trust, I will beat yo ass like you stole something the next time I see you and that dumb hoe you with. Cause she stupid too. Still letting you get a hall pass, when you can't even follow the rules you agreed to follow with her. You stupid cheating ass. Yall ain't shit.

[stonecoldjerseyfox]

Jersey on my mind (part 20)

The sun rises and slowly transforms the pitch black night into early morning, then into forenoon. Daryl observes how the quiet community, as if it had been in a coma overnight, slowly wakes up. He sees people come out of the houses, hears Carol calling out ‘breakfast’s ready’ inside the house and the clinking of forks, spoons and knives against plates. But he doesn’t move from his spot at the porch stair. 

Ever since he and Jersey handed over the watchtower to Eric and another Alexandrian that he haven’t bothered to put a name on and Mila went to sleep for a few hours, he’s been sitting here, sunken in thoughts.

It’s too much to process somehow. Everything he feels, everything he found out about her; it’s overwhelming not knowing what to do with all of these swirling… whatever it is. She’s like a goddamn hurricane. All hair and hell. Damn, she’s pretty, beautiful even. And that accent. She talks a lot. She’s pragmatic to the point of being indifferent. Maybe because she was raised like a goddamn robot by a psychopath. She’s hot tempered, impatient, stubborn... and holy fuck, Daryl digs it. All of her; the big heart, the kindness, the humor and the sarcasm. It’s like booze mixed with cherry coke. The way she looks at him… or is it just a creation of his own imagination? Is he a complete idiot for thinking that she looked at him in a special way when they sat there together, in the dark, sharing that bottle of vodka? Could it be- no! Obviously she doesn’t- he’s a fool. But the way he felt, throughout his entire body and soul, when their hands touched, he definitely felt something. But that might just be it, his own stupid delusion. When she told him she’d been engaged, and declared that whoever gave her the ring was dead, Daryl felt like the devil himself for feeling relieved, but also bad for feeling like that. 

The night has truly been peculiar, he thinks, while resting his gaze on a bird in a tree, trying to feed its squeaking nestlings. Parts of what Mila told him Daryl had recognized from his own childhood. He’d been beaten up many times by his old man, leaving deep scars that never faded. He’d been neglected and abused for most of his childhood, by everyone when it came down to it. But he was a boy. Not that it justified his father's actions towards him, but Daryl could at least, and used to, fight back. He was a pretty good fighter at an early age and knew he had to aim for the kidneys. But Mila was a girl, an unwanted girl who had to face the shame and blame for not being born as the son her old man so badly wanted. He’d reminded her every single day of her shortcoming, and she had apologized, and that (and when she told about the physical abuse, because that’s what it was, even though she didn’t refer to it that way) had hit him hard. How she somehow, even though she clearly despised and distanced herself from his actions, could talk about him with something that sounded like affection, Daryl found astonishing. Like she desperately cling on to the good memories, the few she might have. Was it a perfect example of Stockholm Syndrome, or just pure madness? She’d lived in a lie for almost her entire life, he’d murdered people; how was it possible that she was so indifferent after what she’d been through? Or maybe she just managed to conceal it behind a thick wall of oppressed feelings. He could understand that more than well in a way. But on the other hand it seemed like she’d turned her life around; she had a kid who she’d managed to keep alive. Her story had made him feel secure, less odd about his own history that he’d tried so hard to oppress, to push back into the deepest darkest corner of his soul, never to reveal to any living soul. 

Daryl had never talked to anyone about his upbringing, in fact he’d never talked to anyone as he talked to Mila. Somehow she managed to get these things out of him, that he had previously buried deep inside himself, that he’d never in a million years thought he would tell anyone as he told her the other night. She treats him in a way he’s never been treated before. 

Daryl twitches when he feels a thug on his vest. He removes his chin from the stock of the crossbow and turns where he sits on the porch stairs. 

“Hey kiddo.”

Juri smiles and sits down on the stairs next to him. He’s dressed in dungarees and boots, has seemingly managed to dress himself this morning, but has failed to tie the shoelaces that dangles around his soles.

“That won’t do. Come here.” Daryl waves his hand and nods at the shoelaces that flutter in the wind. The boy obediently raises his foot, Daryl takes it and puts it to his knees and begins to lace the small boot. “Gotta tie ‘em up good, or they’ll fall off ya’ feet.” he says and ties the shoe steadily, but not too tight. He doesn’t want to be responsible for causing Jersey Jr. a broken foot.

Daryl ties the other shoes too, then they sit there next to each other, quiet. Every now and then the boy snails up at him curiously. When Daryl snails back, Juri looks away, giggling. He’s kinda funny, Daryl thinks to himself and smiles. Cheeky, a li’ rascal.

“Ya’ mum’s not up yet?” he asks. 

Juri shakes his head, then makes a snarling sound. 

“She snores?” Daryl grins. “Yeah, ‘bet she does, kiddo. Heard ya’ were a snorer too.” He gives of a grunt, like a pig and Juri bursts into a big, faint, silent laugh. “Ya’ wanna go for a walk?”

Juri nods eagerly. 

“Let’s go.” 

Daryl gets up, grabs Juri under his armpits and lifts him up and places him on the ground. They walk around the pond, a walk that normally doesn’t take half an hour, but since his companion is only 3 feet tall, the pace is below average. When they arrive back to the house, Mila’s standing on the porch, shielding her face from the sun with her hand. Daryl once again gets all warm throughout the body and his tongue starts to crawl back up toward his palate. No, dammit! Juri starts to run towards her when he sees her, with three flowers clenched in his hand, that he picked next to the pond. 

“For me!” Mila’s smile could light up the entire Safe-Zone if it would've been night, when he hands her the flowers. “Moya lyubov, thank you.” She looks up at Daryl. “Where are your flowers?”

“Didn’t pick any.”

“What a shame.” She stands up and looks at Juri. “You know what! Carol has been an angel, and made lunch for you, Romeo.”

Mila shoves Juri into the house, while the boy waves at Daryl from between her legs. 

“Slept well?” 

“Enough.” she answers easily. “I need to get out of here for a while. Gotta go find new shoes for Juri. What kind of mother lets her son walk around in heavy boots in this heat?” 

“Good luck with that.” Daryl scoffs. “Getting past those assholes unnoticed won’t be easy.” 

The sapphire eyes peers at him through the sun. 

“Wanna join then?” She asks boldly with a grin. “Show off those hunter skills. Trust me, it’s easier to find game meat than a pair of kids size nine’s.” 

Daryl snorts and looks around. It’s not an impossible mission, but foolish. On the other hand, he can’t just wander around in here. He’s convinced that she would leave on her own if he doesn’t follow, no matter how much he, or anyone else, opposed it. 

“Gear up, Jersey.” He therefore answers and nods a little. 

Mila smiles triumphantly, turns on her heel and enters the house. She returns minutes later, with the automatic rifle on her shoulder and a backpack, dressed in a worn, black leather jacket over the dark t-shirt.

“New jacket?”

“Not directly. I got it for my eighteenth birthday. Saw it in this store down in Ashbury Park and thought, ‘hey, I’d look so cool in that’, so Adam and Peter brought it to me.” She corrects her left  boot with the other foot. “I love fun jackets! Fringes, embroideries- I'll be buried in this one, if that's the last thing I do.” Mila smiles. “Oh, and I told Carol we were going out.”

“What did she say?” Daryl asks, clenching his jaw. Some things are better left unsaid. Like sneaking off in the middle of what can be likened to a siege.

“Something like, have fun-” Mila replies and hurries down the porch. “And take it easy.”

They walk toward the wall, toward the place Daryl climbed to enter the Safe-Zone. Mila climbs onto the truck easily and soon they’re standing on the roof of the trailer, looking out over the landscape on the other side of the Alexandria walls.

“Head for the woods.” Daryl points. “The bike’s in there somewhere. Short run.”

Quickly and silently, they get down the trailer and start running towards the trees, into the woods. 

“Ya’ know where to go?” Daryl asks as they find the motorcycle in the same place he left it.

“I have a strategy.” Mila replies. “Houses with toys and swing sets outside usually have kids stuff inside too.”

“Fine.” Daryl gets the motorcycle up and leads it up the road. “Let’s go find some swing sets.”

He straddles the motorcycle and scoots forward, to give her room to sit behind him. Mila throws her leg over the body of the bike and sits down on the leather seat and wraps her arms around his waist. Daryl takes a deep breath, tries his best to maintain a normal heartbeat. 

”All right.” he coughs nervously. 

He warns the engine once again before he kicks off. He can feel all of the power in the machine throughout his entire body. Behind him, Mila squeezes his waist and makes a delighted cry as he increases the speed as he maneuvers the beast on the desolated road. 

“This is awesome!” Mila hollers into his ear.

A smile spreads on his lips and he speeds up, causing Mila to hug harder around his waist and laugh. They cruise around the nearby residential areas, scouting for children’s bikes in the driveways, basketball hoops, colorful slides and toys. Eventually, they find a street that seems to fill all the criteria. Daryl hits the brakes and the motorcycle stops next to a two storey house with a hoop and a climbing frame in the yard. Mila climbs off and takes her rifle, attaches the silencer over the barrel. 

“Okay, let’s find some shoes.” Daryl states. “Lead the way.” Briskly, Mila starts walking toward the door, rips it up and raises the AK in front of her and walks into the house. He follows, cautiously listening for hissing sounds and dragging feets. It’s clearly not her first rodeo. Mila immediately starts looking in wardrobes, in the laundry room and in cabinets. 

“Nope. Nothing.” she notes after a while. “Let’s continue.”

They leave the house and start walking down the street. Mila’s long hair blows effortlessly in the wind as they pass by abandoned houses, driveways and overgrown lawns. In the distance Daryl sees a lone, limping walker approach them in the street. He lifts the crossbow to his shoulder, aims and shoots. In the distance he sees it fall into a pile on the grund.  

“That house seems promising.” Mila points toward a house with what looks like a homemade skateboard ramp in the driveway. 

Daryl runs over to the walker, lying in a pile on the asphalt, to collect the arrow. When he turns, Mila has caught sight of a rotten creature, appearing from behind the molding ramp. With ease she lifts the rifle, aims and places a bullet in its head and it drops to the ground with a thud. With a crooked smile Daryl remembers what she said about the soup can. He then finds her inside the house, browsing the books in a bookshelf in the living room. 

“Children's Books!” Mila holds up a book for him to see. Where the wild things are, Daryl reads from the cover. He’s never read it. On the other hand, his ma’ never read books for him and Merle. “There’s so many cute books here! Peter Rabbit, Paddington-” she grabs the books and puts them in a pile. 

Daryl rests on the back of the couch, watches her stacking books on a chair. He’s amazed by how she engages her entire heart and soul to make sure that the boy has everything he could ever wish for. What would it have been like growing up like that? 

With about ten children's books stuffed in the backpack, Mila then continues through the house in the search of a new wardrobe for Juri, faintly humming. Daryl finds a weapon cabinet where the owner forgot a Glock and a few boxes of ammunition, and Mila finds a pair of Chuck Taylor’s in Juri’s size.

“Half a size too big, but his feet will grow.” She states and puts the shoes in the backpack.

If he thought they were done by now, Daryl was mistaken. They therefore proceed to the house next door.

“You notice something?” 

Daryl immediately turns all vigilant, looks around in search of hostility movements. Mila laughs a little. 

“What?” Daryl scoffs, mildly irritated, and lowers his guard. 

“We’re alone.” Mila says as they walk around a dense bush, once perfectly trimmed in a rounded shape, in front of the porch. “Like a little adventure. Pretty fun, right?” 

She feels the door handle and nods. Unlocked. She pushes the door open and it goes up with a creak. Mila quietly walks into the hall, Daryl follows, with a gut feeling that something will happen. And his guts don’t lie. All of a sudden Mila’s pushed to the carpet by a walker coming at them from the left, followed by its two companions. The first one attacks Mila and Daryl’s grabbed by a male, missing an eye. Mila swears loudly, a muffled bang is heard when she shoots the walker right in the face and tries to get up from the floor. Daryl tries to pull away from the one eyed bastard, that clings to his vest. The rotting mouth and disgusting fingers claws to his torso. 

”Watch it!”

With impressive force Mila grabs a hold of it by its shoulders, pulls it away from him and throws it into the opposite wall of the hallway. She takes her knife from her boot shaft and pushes it into its forehead. Daryl takes a hold of the last, remaining dead asshole and pushes an arrow deeply into its skull, forcing it down on the floor. 

“Are you alright?” 

“Ey, wha-”

Without another word, Mila lifts his shirt and searches his torso for wounds, or at least he thinks that’s what she does. Oh god, please don’t. Daryl gets intense chills of pleasure all through his body by her touch. Those soft, delicate fingers send shivers throughout his body in sheer delight. She withdraws, sighs in relief. 

”Though it bit you.” she says. 

“I’m fine.” Daryl replies, hardly meeting her gaze as he pulls the shirt down.

He tries to steady his breath, all while Mila still pants faintly. Their eyes meet, or are more like glued to each other. Daryl’s heart beats hard inside his ribcage, he can almost hear it like a drum inside his ears. Suddenly, before he’s able to say or do anything, Mila has thrown herself onto him, presses her lips against his in a kiss out of this world. It’s so sudden and so surprising that he can’t turn all flushed and angry, his usual defense mechanism in unfamiliar situations. But it’s also everything he’d ever dreamt it would be. Why would he withdraw? With her hands on each side of his face, her soft tongue finds its way in-between his lips into his mouth, exploring every inch of his mouth like a gold miner looking for nuggets. It’s mesmerizing, he’s never been kissed like this in his entire life. 

He cups her face with his hand, the one not holding on to the crossbow, feels the soft skin towards his palm. It soon finds its way to her lower back, as he presses her body against his as she begins to guide them away from the hallway massacre, with the three dead corpses, into the other room. Daryl briefly presses her up against a wall, making a framed picture fall to the floor. The rough, passionate kissing turns into a frenzy of hands and heavy panting. Daryl drops the crossbow to the floor and steers Mila towards the dining table. He pushes her towards the table, while their fingers eagerly search for buttons and zippers during heavy breathing and intense eye contact. 

He’s so excited, so frantically horny. Never before has he felt such a desire. He fumbles, all while Mila’s able to kick off one boot, push down her jeans and underwear, making them dangle around her leg and unbuckles his belt at the same time like a fucking magician. Daryl lets out a grunt as his palms run over her bare, soft thigh. He presses his forehead against hers and they kiss again, moaning into each other's mouths. Mila’s chest heaves rapidly underneath the t-shirt as she unbuttons his jeans, pushes them over his hips, releases his pulsating cock and drags him closer. She caresses him, touches him to the point of almost no return. Daryl ends it by grabbing her buttocks in his hands, lifts her up onto the table. She spreads her legs, pants breathlessly as she pulls him in between. Daryl grunts as he lightly fondles her, she’s so fucking wet. For him! That’s the most fucking incredible part, well, one of thousands right now. There is no darn turning back now. Without breaking eye contact, almost drowning in those sapphire eyes, while inhaling her scent, the floral and everything that enchants him, Daryl enters her, making both of them exhale loudly. She tightens around him and it feels as if he will come right away. Jesus christ, I can’t hold it, he finds himself thinking as he feels a rush of pleasure spread through his body, it won’t go. He starts to grind his hips into her, causing her to moan loudly, to dig her fingers into the back of his vest, as she jerks her hips forward against him. He lets out a low growl and starts to pound into her, making the table squeak, holding her in place while he with the other hand softly grabs the hair on the back of her head, not breaking their eye contact; all while a feverish heat runs through his body. 

Dear god he doesn’t want it to end, but he can feel himself edging as her body clenches around him, and he realizes that it’s more than close. He can feel it, her entire body screams that she’s on the edge too. She lifts her head to the ceiling, as she reaches climax and the surge of warmth from her orgasm surrounds him. Daryl moans loudly into her neck, feels his entire body tremble as he digs his hips into her, as deep as he possibly can, exploding inside of her.

They gasp for air, as if there wasn't enough oxygen in the room, bodies trembling, but they don’t break eye contact. Something warm runs down his cramping thigh, bolting with his runaway pulse.

“Shit, I’m sorry.” Daryl’s whimpers, his voice breaks. He swallows, but doesn’t move, just keeps holding on to Mila’s body like a castaway clinging to a piece of board. “I’m sorry-” 

“I’m not.” Mila pants with her fingers entangled into the back of his head, the other hand grasping the back of the vest. “I’m not.”

They remain like that for a few seconds; silent, trying to get a grip of the whole situation and what just happened, how amazing it was. Daryl lowers his eyes, for the first time in what feels like forever and with a soft movement he wipes away the warmth from her inner thigh with his thumb. He feels high on adrenaline, feverish, standing there with one hand under her left thigh and the other in a firm grip round her buttocks, welded together. 

“I want ya’.” Daryl manages to utter between the heavy breaths, looking back at her. “Ya’ asked me what I want. I want ya’.”

Mila caresses his face with the other hand, runs it softly over his lips. 

“I want you too.” She replies. Daryl’s uncertain, did she actually say that? The faint smile he gets, between the panting breaths, somehow says it all. ”You heard me, Dixon.”

[fiercyy]

Chapters: 12/? Fandom: Naruto Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence Relationships: Haruno Sakura/Uchiha Sasuke, Haruno Sakura & Uzumaki Naruto, Haruno Sakura & Hatake Kakashi, Team 7 - Relationship, Uchiha Sasuke & Uzumaki Naruto, Haruno Sakura & Hatake Kakashi & Uchiha Sasuke & Uzumaki Naruto Characters: Haruno Sakura, Uchiha Sasuke, Uzumaki Naruto, Hatake Kakashi, Tsunade (Naruto), Orochimaru (Naruto) Additional Tags: AU, Post-Chuunin Exams, post chuunin exams attack, Minor Character Death, Trauma, Team 7 Family bonding, Genin Era, Everybody moves in with Sasuke, he's got room, semi-au, Plot Twists, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Roommates, Friends to Enemies, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, BAMF Haruno Sakura, Dai-nana-han | Team 7 (Naruto) Feels, BAMF Dai-nana-han | Team 7 (Naruto), Team as Family, Slow Burn Series: Part 1 of Post-Chuunin Exam AU Summary:

Sakura always wished she could relate to her teammates better. She wishes she could take it back.

In which Sasuke acquires some unwanted roommates and a team becomes a family.

Note: I realized that I never posted these chapter to Tumblr, so I’m just catching up :) 

.

.

Naruto's grand plan to get Sakura back on Team 7 will come to him any day now. He's sure of it. They can't just not be a team anymore. That would be crazy. In the meantime, it's kind of been a good vacation. He gets to sleep in every day, he hardly ever needs to see Sasuke's stupid face. On the other hand, he never gets to see Sakura. She's not talking to any of them. It doesn't matter what he says or how he pleads. She won't open her door when she's home and she won't tell him where she's going when she leaves.

As he takes the long way home from hanging out with Chouji and Shikamaru, he turns over the problem in his head. He just needs to try harder—maybe do something nice for her. He'll treat her to ramen! The thought of it makes his stomach rumble and the phantom scent tickle his nostrils.

He opens the front door to the apartment and nearly trips over his own feet.

Sakura is standing at the stove, ladling broth into two bowls. She smiles tentatively at him before biting her lip. "Hi."

"…Hi."

Awkwardly, she gestures to the kitchen table, which is already set with chopsticks, spoons, napkins and glasses of water. "I made ramen."

He can see that. It smells amazing.

In a daze, he drops into the chair kitty-corner from hers. She sets his bowl in front of him and he glances between it and her, then back again. He doesn't touch it. He wants to know what's happening. She's being her normal self, someone he hasn't seen in what feels like forever.

Sakura seems to sense his apprehension. "I'm really sorry Naruto."

"You don't have to be-"

"Yes I do," she swallows, "I want to make sure you know that I wasn't angry with you and I shouldn't have shut you out like that. I was mad at Kakashi-sensei and Sasuke-kun and a bunch of other stuff, but I shouldn't have taken it out on you. You were just trying to be a good friend."

He shrugs, honestly it wasn't much different than when she'd yell at him before.

"It's not okay and you didn't deserve that." She takes his hands and so many feelings well inside him. He tries to think of the last time someone said they were sorry and meant it. He can't recall. "You're a really good friend." Naruto's face heats and he demurs. No one's ever said that about him either. He's torn between tears and smiles, so he splits the difference.

Wow.

He sniffles. "Thank you Sakura-chan. And this looks awesome!"

Forgoing the chopsticks, he tips the bowl directly into his mouth. And coughs.

"Oh my god."

"Good? I made it a little spicy…"

"Sakura, I'm so sorry, I really appreciate the thought but this is terrible."

.

.

It's the only apology she owes and Sakura is satisfied with that. She never dreamed it would be difficult, but everything went over so easy with Naruto that she almost feels guiltier now than she did before.

Getting what she wants from Sasuke will be way more difficult. She has no hopes for an apology, but she'd settle for some semblance of understanding. And it would take her entire arsenal of everything she's learned about him since being put on the same team. The most important of which, is this:

If you want Sasuke to understand something, you have to beat it into him.

.

.

Sasuke does not apologize. The last time he was made to, he was eight years old and his mom threatened not to let him play with Itachi until it was done. There hasn't been anyone in a position to make him do anything for a long time. From age eight to twelve he has been beholden to no one.

Now he's doing things like buying groceries for three and making sure he buys the lactose free milk so that N aruto doesn't hog the bathroom excessively. He's taking into account people's feelings. He has roommates.

He tried to reason with Kakashi.

Naruto was going about it all wrong. You can't change someone's mind if you don't engage with them. Instead of not showing up, Sasuke was belligerent right to his face. Hopefully he took some of it to heart. Maybe he even talked to Sakura. Stranger things have happened.

He wouldn't say he's sorry… but he hates the way things are now. Everything is much better when Team 7 is together.

It's more efficient, he tells himself. He needs sparring partners, he reasons.

He misses them, he refuses to admit.

.

.

He's so predictable; it's easy to ambush Sasuke while he's training.

Sakura lands directly behind him while he takes a breather between kick exercises. He doesn't turn around. He does that annoying thing where he keeps his back to you but says your name like he knew you were there the whole time—tool.

"What do you want?" he tries to be intimidating but to her ears he just sounds apprehensive, like he's priming himself for being yelled at.

"I wanna talk."

He whirls half around, "Seriously?"

"No," she goes for the knees; manages to knock him over, but can't dodge the elbow he jabs into her side. Sakura rolls to the side, coughing. "I came to," another cough, "kick your ass."

She can't believe her ears, he actually snorts at her. It makes her blood boil. "PREPARE YOURSELF YOU JERK!"

Sasuke rolls his eyes and takes a reluctant defensive stance. Nobody moves for a long moment. "Well? Come kick my ass," he mocks.

Sakura isn't stupid. She knows in an all-out fight she's no match for him. Yet. He's got the Sharingan and Chidori on his side. But she has boiling, undiluted rage sublimating into pure adrenaline.

His first punch lands on her shoulder. "Ow!"

"Seriously?!" He fell for it!

"NO!" She takes advantage of his exasperated pause and grabs his fist and twists, throwing him over her shoulder and onto the ground. She bends at the waist to glare into his eyes, "Take me seriously," she warns, "Or I'll take you down."

"Fine." He windmill kicks, sweeping her legs out from under her. He jumps on her, pinning her to the dirt. "Are you coming back to training or what."

"Why? Do you miss me?" She hooks her knee around his thigh and flips them, holding him down by her forearm against his neck.

"You wish." He flips them again. "Give up yet?"

"Never," then she bites his wrist so hard that he shrieks.

"SAKURA, WHAT THE FU-!" with a sharp thrust of her palm she bloodies his nose and scurries back ten feet.

This isn't what she came here for, but it sure is satisfying.

He comes at her again, and kicks her in the gut, sending her flying into a tree trunk. Winded, she slides to the dirt among the roots. "I don't need you, you know. You can retire for all I care. You and Naruto."

She grunts and spits out a wad of blood, "Keep telling yourself that."

"I was right and if you can't handle your emotions, that's not my problem."

"My emotions?" How did she never see what a sanctimonious ass he could be? And such a hypocrite. "You don't get to lecture me about handling my emotions and not getting angry. You're the angriest person I've ever met and you almost killed Naruto."

She attacks with taijutsu, punches and kicks that would be bruising if she could only land a hit. He dodges but doesn't counter. She can see the frustration in his features and it vindicates something in her to know she's getting to him.

"I get to be mad at the world. I get to be mad at Sound and I definitely get to be mad at you. You didn't invent loneliness okay? We're all sad. We're all angry. We've all lost things. The difference between you and me is that you have somewhere to direct your anger." She goes for another kick, only to find her leg tangled up in razor thin wires. She can see the other end held in his fist. He tugs and more of them tighten around her arms. Their sharpness forces her to be still.

"There is literally nothing I can do," fuck, she's crying now. "There's no one to get vengeance on. Nothing I can achieve that will erase it. What happened to you was awful. You lost your whole family and I only lost my parents… but they were all I had. I'm sorry that you had more to lose. I don't know what to do now. Everything feels different. All I know is that you, Naruto and Kakashi are all that's left."

"My brother did it." His voice prompts her to look up. He glares at the floor and his fist loosens around her bonds. "I don't know what it changes, but it was him. I hate him so much and I will kill him." He cannot admit that he loved him once. That would humanize him in ways that 12-year-old Sasuke is not prepared for. "I don't know what I would do if I didn't have that," he admits. "You still think you want to be like me? I'm going to kill my own brother. Does that scare you?"

She will not be baited. "I'm nothing like you," she lies, "And you don't scare me," she lies again. "You don't have to be nice, but you do have to respect me."

He considers her for a moment, then his grip loosens the rest of the way. The wires drop and he holds out his fist. She bumps it with hers and the move feels at once foreign and cathartic.

"I'm still mad at you."

Sasuke rolls his eyes, but his lips twitch. "I'm mad at you too."

.

.

The nurse at triage takes one look at the two of them; Sakura with her criss cross of cuts, Sasuke with his crooked nose and sighs. "Can't you take care of this yourself?"

Sakura beams, "Of course! It's not for me. He's so pretty, it'd be a shame if I disfigured him permanently. Hearts would break all over Konoha!"

He shoots her a cutting glare but doesn't argue. He's a little vain too.

The nurse looks unamused and gestures for them to sit.

Sasuke plans to sit in silence for the next seven hours while more important injuries are taken care of, but Sakura makes it impossible. She might be trying to punish him by being as annoying as possible. She talks about Naruto and Ino and that stupid firefighting turtle show. And he definitely doesn't care that this feels almost normal.

"What are you doing here?"

Sasuke snaps out of ignoring Sakura to stare at the Godaime Hokage, standing imposing and tall over them as they sit in a pair of cheap plastic folding chairs. "It has nothing to do with the Magekyou," he is quick to reassure.

"Not you," the Hokage says drily, "It's very clear what you're here for." Then she pinches his nose between her glowing green pointer and thumb, then twists.

He shouts at the crack, but the pain quickly subsides. He rubs his nose and dried flecks of blood come away, but it feels like the correct shape.

"Sakura."

"Shisou!"

"I hope you didn't come in for those scrapes."

"No ma'am."

"I'll have no apprentice of mine embarrassing me and wasting a doctor's time."

"Of course ma'am."

"I'll show you how to fix them yourself up tomorrow, after that you'll have to start coming to training with injuries or else we'll have nothing to do."

"I could always bring him," Sakura offers, jerking a thumb in Sasuke's direction.

"Sure you could, but if you fuck up you could blow a leg off. That might be the wrong kind of motivation. Now scram."

"Yes ma'am!" Sakura giggles and grabs Sasuke's arm, dragging him outside.

"You made me listen to you talk about Ino's haircut but you didn't mention that?"

.

.

Earlier…

Kakashi scooches closer on the roof and bumps shoulders with Sakura, who's been staring at her swinging feet for several minutes now.

"I'm tired of being mad, I don't want to feel anything anymore."

"You don't want that."

"Yes I do. It hurts all the time… I just want to be strong. Like you. I don't want to cry anymore."

Kakashi stares out at the sunrise and feels the ancestral guilt of a hundred generations of shinobi, all the teachings that led a 12-year-old girl to think it was wrong to mourn. "I don't want you to be like me," he admits, "I want you to be better. I want better for you."

Her tired smile rewards him, golden light reflected warmly. Maybe he can do right by these kids.

He's not doing too bad.