#and just all this other stuff . lack of depth lack of continuity etc etc all for pushing some ''a wesome'' marketable oneliner or a certain

[asteriass]

The progression of the “Villainess” trope

Y'know, thinking about it, it's very ironic how a trope made to subvert one's expectations & give more depth to 1 dimensional villains in cliche novels by "humanizing" them more & providing their side of the story, eventually became oversaturated with cartoony villains & flat MCs. Thus, completely failing in its goal to "subvert expectations" as it too turned into mind numbing cliche, becoming the exact opposite of what the troupe initially aimed to achieved.

I am talking about "Villainess" series.

I remember seeing a twitter post a while back saying how a lot of the villainess stuff the authors & studios are putting out nowadays lack any sort of nuance when it comes to its characters. And how a lot authors simply switch the roles of the cast (Like: OG MC -> villain | OG villain -> MC) & call it a day. And I 100% agree with that.

This troupe kinda ended up becoming the dictionary definition of the saying, "You either die as a hero, or live long enough to see yourself become a villain” lmao

What could've been an opportunity to write nuanced villains & morally ambiguous main characters, turned EXACTLY into the cliche it was pocking fun at.

In an attempt to reveal how the MCs of your typical cliche novels can also be in the wrong at times, flaws that the story & its (in-canon) fandom may purposefully ignore, the villainess stories ended up doing EXACT SAME thing EXECPT this time it's the "villains" doing it rather than the OG FL or OG ML of the “OG novel”. In an attempt to stop cliche villains from remaining cliche, while we did ended up getting slightly more nuance for the “OG villain” characters, in the process, the OG MCs turned exactly into those flat cliche villains.

Alot of villainess series poke fun at the troupes they themself use, but not in a satirical way.

So many villainess series poke fun at the OG novels for being problematic or stupid & the fandom of said novels basically ignoring its flaws & problems, only gushing over the OG FL. Which yea, is nice & all, but y'know... that's exactly what those villainess series do too. SO MANYY of them borderline have the FLs participating in literal slavery. & More often than not have a borderline colonizer ML. Not to mention the numerous which carry weird undertones of colorism, and many such other things. All the while, the fandom of these villainess series continue to ignore their glaring problems & flaws & instead just gush over the FL and ML.

And I'm not even saying this in a hating sort of way (well, aside from the series with issues of colorism, orientalism, etc). Moreover, this is all not to say that one can not enjoy such stories, because admittedly, there is indeed fun in just reading a simple and familiar story line. But this is all more me being intrigued by this trope’s almost ironic progression as companies rush their staff to produce something which they think will be able to ride the waves of the current trends, only for the vast majority to simply drown in a sea of mediocrity (with many even being canceled due to this)

[Though I mean, something as simple as villainess tropes won’t be the only one to go through this. Like a lot of Shakespearean works, a subversion of the classics & typical troupes back then, got turned into ones of those classics and by many are now considered cliche. And that's just scrapping the bottom of the barrel!]

[olderthannetfic]

Hey. Maybe not the place. But people treat your ask box like a forum so 🙏 I thought I was ace because porn does nothing for me and I only like erotica/doujinshi if I like the characters. But I recently discovered watching wrestling does something for me. Is this really weird? How do I know where I fit?

--

I will gleefully embrace the identity of basement-dwelling gremlin who prefers horny fiction to actually dating or having sex with other people.

But porn tastes aren't what defines sexual orientation.

Neither is willingness to get off the couch.

Are you attracted to people, anon? That's usually how people define the various identities on that spectrum: no attraction, very occasional attraction way below what's seen as commonplace, attraction only when you know someone well, etc. (Which, of course, brings up the question of what level is "normal" and whether someone's judging based on Hollywood nonsense or on what's actually typical.)

For me personally, mainstream porno movies have actors I find un-hot wearing clothing I find libido-killing in ugly environments with bad lighting and camerawork. The scenarios lack the psychological depth needed to interest me, and there's little sense of intimacy.

This has nothing to do with orientation and everything to do with film craft.

Doujinshi of characters I'm already familiar with have a lot more context for what's going on, and this can add a lot of zing to kinks or increase the apparent intimacy.

Wrestling has plotlines. It has deeply charismatic stars. It has different body types than a lot of porn. There's nothing odd about finding it hot but not liking the porno movies you've been exposed to.

Plenty of people prefer all of the horny film festival favorites of the 90s to actual porno movies. It seems like funding dried up for those kinds of movies for a decade or two, but they used to be common.

I preferred the kinkier ones. Crash, for example, was a staple of my teenage viewing. Not the cringey one that won too many awards: the pervert one with the eight billion scenes of people licking each other's scars like they were performing oral.

It really digs into the psychology of kink... in addition to being far more visually beautiful and starring far hotter people than most of the commercial porn I've seen. Same deal with The Pillow Book or ¡Átame! or Maurice or Bound.

I've been seeing articles lately talking about a return to 90s levels of sex in arty movies. People point to the likes of Call Me By Your Name and Saltburn.

Live action commercial porno movies do vary, obviously, but it's just so, so, so common to find them tacky or boring while liking other forms of porn, even other live action sex scenes.

Hell, even for poorly shot stuff, I've never seen even amateur porn capture the vibes of this one long-deleted youtube video of a guy giving a lecture on anal massage and treating his subject like a prop while lecturing to a big group of onlookers.

--

Sometimes, people just aren't very into casual sex, and horny art where they can fantasize about people who actually know each other is better than horny art about the pizza delivery guy. Sure, there are pornos that try to have more plot, but porn stars are generally good at being porn stars, not at subtle and naturalistic acting.

Wrestlers are hardly subtle, but they do do different acting from your average porno, and there's more continuing plotline. Unless you mean... like... college wrestling? (In which case, Kink.com has or had some series where people wrestle to decide who gets to top. Wrestling is hardly a niche interest.)

For kinksters, the context and psychology often matter a lot. Showing an object with a lot of cultural baggage, like shiny black leather, can be hot, but the viewer might need more, and your average porno isn't geared up to provide that.

--

Anyway, if you want to determine your own orientation, your interest in art isn't necessarily going to help that much.

If you're only rarely attracted to people, and you have to know them well first, you could be demisexual, but you could equally well be shy or nervous or depressed or repressed or too busy and stressed to spend much time noticing your own feelings—or just surrounded by people who aren't your type. Only your personal interpretation of your internal experience can determine which it is.

But no, being horny for wrestling is not weird.

[poicyss]

Okay I definitely wanna hear ur Duck gushing. I liked her too, but I won't deny the one that was my fav was Rue lol

She's just so much! Aaahh!!!

I feel like Duck is very much a very basic anime protagonist on the surface - clumsy but kind, willing to do anything for her friends, a little confused but she has the spirit etc. However!! While she may be basic, she is in no way boring!

I feel like a lot of the times clumsiness is slapped onto main characters for humor and cute value. And while it does make her silly and cute, it also plays a big role in her character and her struggles. She feels like she doesn't ever really fit in, clumsily navigating and trying to balance the life of Duck the girl and Duck the bird and her role in the story as Princess Tutu.

She's called dumb all the time, but she's very wise! Especially if you're a fan of Rue, you can see how wise Duck is when giving advice and talking to her about her feelings and their relationship with Mytho, even if she has trouble getting her point across. Her intentions, even if her words were jumbled, were felt and changed Rue for the rest of the series. Duck is very Empathetic and a lot better at reading people than she gives herself credit for. She thinks she only has the ability to "save" people as Tutu, but I think a lot of her greatest contributions to saving the others were done as Duck.

She also is very brave. She's the one who first examines her role in the story and tries to search for a better ending. I mean obviously, she's the protagonist, but still! Fakir had been going through the same song and dance his whole life, wishing to change the story and stop it from finishing, but he doesn't go actively looking for a better alternative, instead just sort of stalling for time by keeping Tutu from collecting the heart shards.

I really like how Princess Tutu handles it's characters and their struggles AS characters. I feel like a lot of the time when you hear about characters being "doomed by the narrative" or whatever it's referring more to characters who are doomed by action and not role. And due to being the protagonist, of course, this difference is shown best through Duck. She happily accepts her role as Tutu at first, but then later considers that by becoming human she has been losing her identity as a duck, and how the role of Princess Tutu was sort of forced upon her. Is she just Princess Tutu, or is she more?

And she worries about being a tool used for helping people, but still continues to help people regardless. She's not perfect obviously, but her heart is ALWAYS in the right place, and she is incredibly sincere and strong and I think it's great that she is still able to be the same silly girl while having to struggle with stuff like her identity, purpose and destiny.

I feel like a lot of the time when people apply "angst" to genki characters like Duck it can feel insincere. A lot of people see silly characters, ESPECIALLY GIRLS, as lacking depth. Even protagonists! But Duck is just so emotionally rich. She's very cheery and always wants to do her best, of course, but she's not tied to just being a happy character. Actually, she's probably the only one of the main four who doesn't really wear a mask! She doesn't need to, since her emotions and connections fuel the story and it's characters in a way that isn't just "Don't give up ^^ Love your friends ^^ Girl power!!"

She's awkward and loving and brave and a lot deeper than people (including herself, with all that "I'm just a duck" talk) give her credit for. She reminds me a lot of myself, stumbling blindly through social situations to find a connection and someone who could handle all the big huge emotions I have without being deemed unnecessary.

...I'm gonna be honest, I don't even know if a lot of the above makes sense. I sorta just rambled in a random direction until I felt I made a point lol. And I still feel like I didn't manage to say everything! Ahh!! I love this anime so much!!!

[hospitalterrorizer]

diary536

3/19-20/25

wednesday - thursday

long day,

but very good. i did some stuff today, for textures, or just redstone, i touched it up a bit to add some more depth to it... which feels good. but today mostly i was out of the house, for a very long time, and it was all good, and it was also all of that particular character, of being out, it being a long time, and mostly the night continues happening, a long stretch, each thing that follows the last as automatic as continuing a stretch, this is to say, difficult to narrativize.

one point of tension was between our friends we went out with last time, they just... this is so ridiculous, it's like letting two crabs into a bucket, they just start snipping one another... and it's over... not even israel palestine, which they agree on, it's a horrific genocide, miserable and terrifying and disgusting and it feels like a nightmare and something people are gonna look back on in terror, but they keep... fighting about fucking ethan klein... it's so worthless. youtube being the lens by which people absorb politics is so scary and bad. i know that makes me sound like a kid or something,,, scary and bad... but idk... maybe not even youtube broadly, there's some okay informative stuff out there... but like, the class of streamer that is ethan and so on... like that's poison. i think he's clearly a clown and too much of a 'lib' when really 'lib' means someone who is maybe willing to say this is all bad, but then say, these hamas guys are bad, the government says they're terrorists. like whatever. at the same time picking on the friend who will admit ethan is stupid for ethan's points is like, she isn't him, she makes the evident. it's just like a brain melting thing. i was thinking maybe, the compulsion to attack him through the vector of our friend, and the need to defend, it's just because this crisis is so bad and upsetting and we feel so impotent generally, that this super worthless discourse is all that's left. salt dried on a dock where a sea once was, our existences worthless when the only worthwhile thing seems like stopping this totally. but we're all probably there, you know. none of us can do it alone... idk... they just need to quit it ultimately, maybe accepting impotence, inability, failure, means laziness or a lack of morals... i don't really think so... i've always tried to do what i can, but i'm worthless basically and poor, i give away when i can, i've tried to make it to events, i've gone to... one thing i guess. i'm sure both of them, being better off, or employed at least, being more mobile, have done more. i know one says she doesn't wanna do this at all, but idk, she will defend him. it feels like it goes both ways, like both want to be right. i dunno.

the other issue with describing everything, is that i am sooo tired.

we went to a couple bars, basically, split off for a bit, some friends got tacos, we got pizza, some people got very drunk but in an pleasant enough way... i talked to a friend, earlier in the night, about aleister crowley, wicca, my mom. she asked if the extremity of that stuff creates a kind of sanity for people, and i said yeah, but that generally ends up being... idk, it's actually a complicated thing, it creates a set of standards and norms by which to grasp phenomena/the world, people, etc, and by doing so everything can be reduced into that method of understanding basically. that's, especially in new age-y spiritual things, always seemed to trend super reactionary and stuff. something to think about.

but my eyes are shutting... tired tired tired... i said i was gonna dress like a whore, today, and i did, here i am, looking slutty:

it was rather cold today... i wore a leather jacket but it's not how i really liked the outfit. it's best like that, when i'm wearing very little. i kind of find wearing not a lot gratifying but maybe that's dangerous and stuff. no one really harassed me today though, probably because it's a weekday, which is good. i really like this outfit with the scarf though i think that is really cute. my gf kept saying i look like... well it's i think kind of obvious. this was sort of a reward for her, her dumb thing wandering around wearing too little. i wonder if it's bad for me to want to be like that for people or if it's okay to want to perform services like something for her to look at while out in public and be like, i dunno, well, it's all obvious, but i don't want to say it explicitly. but you know. i guess a lot of people like me struggle with things like this... it's just part of how i am, i've been like this since i was rather young so i probably can't excise it or maybe that's lazy, maybe though, it's best to say, i've made peace with being lascivious, or an object for receiving lasciviousness, maybe that describes it better. or, i don't really like receiving it from strangers, it is sometimes between polite, to being something mortifying, to being kind of traumatic and making me wanna puke, and all kinds of things between that... but usually people, men especially, make me feel crazy... i've talked about it a lot. but i also have the part that wants attention, and i like receiving it from my gf. why am i even talking about this... oh well... i feel like i ought to, since today was kind of an experiment in being super unclothed. although i've also once been in a one piece swimsuit, and swam in that.

i think maybe all this is more normal than i am thinking, this is just being sexy, isn't it, which everyone likes to be. i just feel so foreign to so many things i guess. i make it sound like some weird thing, but really it's that i want to be sexy for my gf, which is a normal thing to do.

there were some people who walked up to me, towards the end of our night, a group of other queer people, and they talked to my gf and our friend who grind on each other because they really get excited dancing around i guess, not in a sexual way, they just find it really fun. and one was like, you're so cute, and they held their hands out to my face and framed my face, and said i'm not going to touch you, they just did that for a bit. they were all in a polycule and i think they thought my gf and i were in one too. they added her on instagram... i wonder if anything will happen with that. they liked that my thing said tumblr star on it. they talked to me about the onceler a bit.

the sun's coming up now, that's so bad... i want to be normal. and sleep normal. i will sleep now, maybe this won't be catastrophic.

so,

byebye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[dream-with-a-fever]

I love your posts!!!

My question for you is: Do you like cursed child?

More specifically their portrayal of hinny/ginny. I personally, I didn’t like it but I’d love to see your opinion on it.

thank you!! ☺️🫶🏼

this is a GREAT question because i have many thoughts about the cursed child. seeing the actual play was incredible. like the staging of it all and the storyline was impressive when told in a theatrical way. i found it very enjoyable to watch.

now, as a text? yeah i did not like it and nor do i think i’ll ever consider it as canon. it’s a while since i read it, so i can’t really remember it all that well but i do remember that there was a lot of stuff i took issue with. the plotline was a MESS, with all the time travelling and the Voldemort having a daughter plotline was shit sorry (but again, in the play itself it was fun and wild to watch — but not as a legitimate continuation of the story?? if that makes sense?) i also didn’t enjoy the characterisations very much, and i hated the way jk wrote harry as a father figure, because i just don’t think he would act like that. hinny’s relationship was alright i thought, but still lacked depth and i hated how draco was suddenly this character they were able to get along with (albeit begrudgingly - but ginny & hermione being nice to him? no) despite the damage he had done in his past. i don’t mind the idea of scorpius and albus being a thing, because scorpius was so ADORABLE in the play, it’s impossible not to love him.

i didn’t like hermione being minister for magic also?? it just felt a bit cliche. idk why. i just feel like there are so many people in the wizarding world, it just seemed a bit unlikely - not that hermione wouldn’t be capable, but i also feel like she wouldn’t enjoy the duties of a minister for magic. she’s much more interested in advocation and being on the ground with causes i think - like i see her doing something more specific for example to help the relations with other magical creatures (elves, goblins, centaurs etc) so yeah i just didn’t buy it.

also another random but very specific thing i hated was what ginny wore in the show. she was dressed like this frumpy old lady, when ginny just NEVER would have dressed like that. just because she’s older doesn’t mean she’d lose her dynamism and charm. the one thing i did like from the text tho, was that little excerpt where ginny said no one spoke to her after the chamber and she felt lonely but then harry came over and challenged her to a game of exploding snap :’) and her saying his courage and kindness has always shown in quiet ways to her. that’s so sweet and romantic. anyways. that’s my messy thoughts. cursed child ≠ canon. let’s just say that.

[zephiris]

All fancy smancy generative ai models know how to do is parrot what they’ve been exposed to.

A parrot can shout words that kind of make sense given context but a parrot doesn’t really understand the gravity of what it’s saying. All the parrot knows is that when it says something in response to certain phrases it usually gets rewarded with attention/food.

What a parrot says is sometimes kinda sorta correct/sometimes fits the conversation of humans around it eerily well but the parrot doesn’t always perfectly read the room and might curse around a child for instance if it usually curses around its adult owners without facing any punishment. Since the parrot doesn’t understand the complexities of how we don’t curse around young people due to societal norms, the parrot might mess that up/handle the situation of being around a child incorrectly.

Similarly AI lacks understanding of what it’s saying/creating. All it knows is that when it arranged pixels or words in a certain way after being given some input it usually gets rewarded/gets to survive and so continues to get the sequence of words/pixels following a prompt correct enough to imitate people convincingly (or that poorly performing version of itself gets replaced with another version of itself which is more convincing).

I argue that a key aspect of consciousness is understanding the gravity and context of what you are saying — having a reason that you’re saying or doing what you are doing more than “I get rewarded when I say/do this.” Yes AI can parrot an explanation of its thought process (eli5 prompting etc) but it’s just mimicking how people explain their thought process. It’s surface level remixing of human expression without understanding the deeper context of what it’s doing.

I do have some untested ideas as to why its understanding is only surface level but this is pure hypothesis on my part. In essence I believe humans are really good at extrapolating across scales of knowledge. We can understand some topics in great depth while understanding others similarly on a surface level and go anywhere in between those extremes. I hypothesize we are good at that because our brains have fractal structure to them that allows us to have different levels of understanding and look at some stuff at a very microscopic level while still considering the bigger picture and while fitting that microscopic knowledge into our larger zoomed out understanding.

I know that neural networks aren’t fractal (self-similar across various scales) and can’t be by design of how they learn/how data is passed through them. I hypothesize that makes them only understand the scale at which they were trained. For LLM’s/GAN’s of today that usually means a high level overview of a lot of various fields without really knowing the finer grain intricacies all that well (see how LLM’s make up believable sounding but completely fabricated quotes for long writing or how GAN’s mess up hands and text once you zoom in a little bit.

There is definitely more research I want to do into understanding AI and more generally how networks which approximate fractals relate to intellegence/other stuff like quantum physics, sociology, astrophysics, psychology, neuroscience, how math breaks sometimes etc.

That fractal stuff aside, this mental model of generative AI being glorified parrots has helped me understand how AI can seem correct on first glance/zoomed out yet completely fumble on the details. My hope is that this can help others understand AI’s limits better and therefore avoid putting too much trust into to where AI starts to have the opportunity to mess up serious stuff.

Think of the parrot cursing around children without understanding what it’s doing or why it’s wrong to say those words around that particular audience.

In conclusion, I want us to awkwardly and endearingly laugh at the AIs which mimic the squaks of humans rather than take what it says as gospel or as truth.

[moiraineswife]

Autistic Allegories in Renarin’s Arc - Meta

s’up y’all, your favourite local rambler is back at it again. Diving straight in to this one. The motivation for this post is something that might be controversial, and I’m going to try and  explain it as clearly as I can and make my intentions clear, but I get this is the internet and things get misinterpreted to fuck. 

So, since Renarin was confirmed to be a queer character, I’ve seen a lot of posts and takes on pretty much every platform I frequent that equates all of Renarin’s traits/struggles in canon as being foreshadowing/parallels to his queer identity and experience. 

I get this. I’m also queer. I understand the instinct to take, say, Renarin’s corrupted spren bond and his desire to keep his nature as a Radiant hidden/his lack of understanding initially and assume it to be queer foreshadowing/parallel. I big get that. And that’s not a bad interpretation. 

The problem is, this is the ONLY interpretation people put forth. They ignore things explicitly said/connections made in canon to Renarin being autistic and say ‘this is it. this is what this means. it’s about him being gay’. When, actually, a good chunk of it is about his experience as an autistic man in an allistic society. Which I think is what Brandon wants to explore/has set up in the text. 

So I decided to look at this in more depth from an autistic perspective - some of the moments that most clearly parallel Renarin’s autistic experience and explain how and why this is a thing, and hopefully just highlight this aspect of his character and explain things to folks. 

Renarin’s Blade Screaming 

Jumping right into it then: Renarin’s bond with Glys is very clearly paralleled with his autism. The text outlines this connection multiple times throughout the series, and explores it in interesting ways. 

First up, Renarin first revealing himself as a Truthwatcher makes this pretty clear: 

“And the Shardblade,” Dalinar said, stepping over and taking his son by the shoulder. “You hear screams. That’s what happened to you in the arena. You couldn’t fight because of those shouts in your head from summoning the Blade. Why? Why didn’t you say anything?”

“I thought it was me,” Renarin whispered. “My mind. But Glys, he says . . .” Renarin blinked. “Truthwatcher.” (WoR)

“Adolin,” he said softly. “I … um … I have to give you back the Shardblade you won for me.”

“Why?” Adolin said.

“It hurts to hold,” Renarin said. “It always has, to be honest. I thought it was just me, being strange. But it’s all of us.”

“Radiants, you mean.”

He nodded. (Oathbringer)

Renarin didn’t explain to his father or the others what was happening to him because he thought it was part of his autistic experience. 

Being autistic you get used to experiencing a lot of in-brain things and not realising that other people don’t experience them, too. I have hypersensitivity to sound. I can hear things other people don’t, because their brains naturally filter them out - like electronics whining. 

The experience of having a Shardblade scream inside your head is actually a pretty great parallel for sensory overload. It’s something intense, something frightening, and overwhelming, and even painful. But Renarin just endures it without comment because that’s what we’re conditioned to do. 

“A group of shellheads tried to seize one of the bridges, Brightlord,” the bridgeman said softly. “Brightlord Renarin insisted on going to help. Sir, we tried hard to dissuade him. Then, when he got near and summoned his Blade, he just kind of . . . stood there. We got him away, sir, but he’s been sitting on that rock ever since.”

[...]

“I just stood there,” Renarin said. “I wasn’t frozen because of my . . . ailment. I’m just a coward.”

When Adolin hears about Renarin freezing up he assumes that he had a fit. Renarin corrects him on this, once he’s verbal again, but says that he was just a coward. 

He froze up once he summoned his Blade. Because it would have started screaming in his head and this was overwhelming. When other Radiants have experienced this on-screen the screaming has been so intense they immediately dropped or dismissed the Blade, unable to hold it. 

From this, I infer that Renarin believes everyone experiences this when they fight with a Shardblade. He doesn’t realise that it’s strange for him because he’s a Radiant. He thinks everyone experiences it, but they push through and overcome it. He can’t, and instead of thinking something strange is going on, he assumes that it’s a weakness of his and that he’s a coward. 

This is a fairly common autistic experience. Why can’t you just get over this? Why is that overwhelming you? Just ignore the sound. Just ignore the lights. Stop being so weak/oversensitive. 

That’s what Renarin thinks is happening. That’s why he doesn’t examine his experiences more closely, and realise he’s a Radiant. He thinks it’s part of him being autistic, and that he’s just being overly sensitive, until Glys is able to communicate with him and explain he’s a Truthwatcher.

The Rhyshadium Don’t Fit

“They don’t fit, you know.”

“Don’t fit?”

“Ryshadium have stone hooves,” Renarin said, “stronger than ordinary horses’. Never need to be shod.”

“And that makes them not fit? I’d say that makes them fit better.…” Adolin eyed Renarin. “You mean ordinary horses, don’t you?”

Renarin blushed, then nodded. (Oathbringer)

This, for me, is one of the most direct and obvious parallel between Renarin’s experience as an autistic man, and his experience as a Radiant. 

Firstly, he comments on the Rhyshadium ‘not fitting’ with ordinary horses. They’re different. They have different hooves, which means they never need to be shod, like regular horses. In this case, being shod is something all horses do. It’s something natural for them, and the Rhyshadium not having it makes them stand out. This is similar to Renarin’s experience in society and in life. 

The Rhyshadium are sometimes called ‘the third shard’ - they’re tied to the Radiants and to Stormlight. Renarin aligning himself with them, and his not fittng with them not fitting, mirrors his being Radiant stopping him from fitting in as he wants to.

A big part of his arc is his desire to fit in somewhere. His integration with Bridge Four is a huge boost to his confidence. He asks to join them to try and find somewhere to belong. The bridgemen are outcasts. They’re people who don’t fit in society, either, for various different reasons. Renarin fits with them, therefore, because he doesn’t fit elsewhere. 

When he starts becoming a Radiant, and a different type of Radiant to the others, he starts to worry again. He worries that, yet again, he’s different for reasons he cannot control, and he’s worried the bridgemen will abandon or reject him as has happened frequently in noble society. 

“So why are you embarrassed?”

“I’m … not?”

Adolin gave him a flat stare.

Renarin dismissed the Blade. “I simply … Adolin, I was starting to fit in. With Bridge Four, with being a Shardbearer. Now, I’m in the darkness again. Father expects me to be a Radiant, so I can help him unite the world. But how am I supposed to learn?”

Adolin scratched his chin with his good hand. “Huh. I assumed that it just kind of came to you. It hasn’t?”

“Some has. But it … frightens me, Adolin.” He held up his hand, and it started to glow, wisps of Stormlight trailing off it, like smoke from a fire. “What if I hurt someone, or ruin things?”

The conversation continues, and further solidifies the connection between the Rhyshadium not fitting with other horses, and Renarin not fitting in with other people. 

He had become a Shardbearer, and was starting to fight and do what an Alethi man is expected to do in society. Go to war with Shards, with glory, etc etc etc. That didn’t quite work out. 

For Renarin, whenever he gets closer to assimilating with the standard society and expectations, something happens to stop him. Initially it’s his epilepsy. He has fits, and his chronic illness makes him generally weaker and more frail, meaning that he can’t fight. 

Once he’s given Shards to help mitigate those factors, he can’t use the Shards because his Radiant bond makes them scream inside his head. Again stopping him from fighting and becoming a soldier. 

He then goes on to tell Adolin that he doesn’t really know how to Radiant. And Adolin says that he thought it would just come to him/he would instinctively know, but he doesn’t. 

This is, again, a very classic autism thing. We struggle with doing things that allistic people find instinctive, and don’t need to be actively taught - such as reading and projecting the correct body language.

Adolin, who takes very naturally to all this stuff, just assumes that Renarin’s Radianting would just come to him, and Renarin has to explain that actually no, it hasn’t. This literally cannot get any clearer in forging an obvious link between his autism and his Radiant abilities. 

Renarin’s ‘Corrupted’ Bond: 

“What’s wrong with me?” Renarin asked. “Why do I see these things? I thought I was doing something right, with Glys, but somehow it’s all wrong.…” (Oathbringer)

[...]

“Does it strike you as cruel of fate, Father? My blood sickness gets healed, so I can finally be a soldier like I always wanted. But that same healing has given me another kind of fit. More dangerous than the other by far.” (Rhythm of War)

[...]

Lopen called out, asking Renarin to “look into the future and find out if I beat Huio at cards tomorrow.” It seemed a little crass to Dalinar, bringing up his son’s strange disorder, but Renarin took it with a chuckle.

[...]

It would be so much easier if he were like other Radiants. (RoW)

[...]

“And a blackness interfering, marring the beauty of the window. Like a sickness infecting both of you, at the edges.”

“Curious,” Dalinar said, looking where Renarin had pointed, though he’d see only empty air. “I wonder if we’ll ever know what that represents.”

“Oh, that one’s easy, Father,” Renarin said. “That’s me.”

“Renarin, I don’t think you should see yourself as—”

“You needn’t try to protect my ego, Father. When Glys and I bonded, we became … something new. We see the future. At first I was confused at my place—but I’ve come to understand. What I see interferes with Odium’s ability. Because I can see possibilities of the future, my knowledge changes what I will do. Therefore, his ability to see my future is obscured. Anyone close to me is difficult for him to read.”

“I find that comforting,” Dalinar said, putting his arm around Renarin’s shoulders. “Whatever you are, son, it’s a blessing. You might be a different kind of Radiant, but you’re Radiant all the same. You shouldn’t feel you need to hide this or your spren.”

Renarin ducked his head, embarrassed. His father knew not to touch him too quickly, too unexpectedly, so it wasn’t the arm around his shoulders. It was just that … well, Dalinar was so accustomed to being able to do whatever he wanted. He had written a storming book.

Renarin held no illusions that he would be similarly accepted. He and his father might be of similar rank, from the same family, but Renarin had never been able to navigate society like Dalinar did. True, his father at times “navigated” society like a chull marching through a crowd, but people got out of the way all the same.

Not for Renarin. The people of both Alethkar and Azir had thousands of years training them to fear and condemn anyone who claimed to be able to see the future. They weren’t going to put that aside easily, and particularly not for Renarin. (RoW)

Sorry for the quote barrage, but there was really  no other way to do this, and I think it makes a nice little arc in how Renarin sees himself and his bond to Glys and, by extension, his autism. 

In the temple, with Jasnah, he considers it to be something wrong. He’d thought he was finally fitting in, being like everyone else, doing something “right” but it turns out his bond is of Odium, and while he thought he fit with the others, he doesn’t. Again.

 The RoW segments are what’s most interesting to me, because what we see here, I think, is Dalinar experiencing Renarin’s ‘disorder’ as he calls it and processing it/coming to terms with it in a way a lot of parents approach their kids’ autism. But this is a bit more approachable/less painful to look at because he’s considering him being a weird glowing power ranger, and not an autistic kid. Easier to examine more honestly. 

So first of all Renarin, again, calls a direct link between his bond and his autism. The ‘healing’ that came with his bond gave him another kind of otherness. Another way he can’t be a soldier - which, for Renarin, in Alethi society, means him being like everyone else. I was going to go into this more here but this thing is already long as fuck, but in a nutshell being a soldier is Renarin’s dream because that’s him being “normal” and being like everyone else, which fate always conspires to stop him from being. 

In Alethi society the peak of masculinity and of fitting in to the social order, which revolves around war and glory and battle courage blah blah blah - is being a soldier and fighting. Which Renarin has never been able to do. Which his father has always wanted him to do - wihich Renarin knows. 

A lot of allistic people, especially allistic parents, think their autistic kids won’t pick up on their blatant ‘oh my god I wish my kid was normal’ vibes. They do. BELIEVE ME they do. This is a good little nod to that. Dalinar has never outright looked at Renarin and said ‘I want you to be a soldier to be worthy of my love and respect’ but it’s what Renarin grew up knowing and seeing from him. 

The evolution of that through exploring Dalinar’s attitude to Renarin being bonded with an Odium-aligned spren is...Utterly fascinating, to say the least.

Here, for example, Dalinar sees it as a “strange disorder”. When Renarin calls a spade a spade and just goes ‘yeah no that weird thing right there that makes you comfortable? That’s me, buddy, get used to it’. Which is just. Absolutely effervescent. There’s a big instinct allistic people have to dance around autistic people. So many innuendos. So many fluffy phrase that I hate. “On the spectrum.” “On the autism spectrum”. “Differently abled” “Sees the world differently.” Just call me autistic and let me move on with life I do not have time to deal with your internalised issues. 

He kind of comes around on it and gives him the whole “you might be a different Radiant but you’re still a Radiant to me, son”. Replace the word Radiant here with person and you’ll have a conversation I’ve experienced so many times. “Just because you’re a weird person doesn’t mean you’re not still a person!” Why thank you for pointing that out. I hadn’t noticed....Thank you for validating my humanity to my face?? As though I needed you to do that?

Contrast this with Renarin’s cheerful acceptance (ABSOLUTELY STUNNING DEVELOPMENT, HELL YES) - ‘yeah no that weird thing right there is me’. I cheered, dear reader, I CHEERED. It’s a little thing but it’s also a very very big thing. 

So is Lopen making light of things - in a way that laughs with Renarin and not at him - wanting him to predict the outcome of his card game. Renarin laughs at this, and is obviously comfortable with the jokes and the camaraderie. Dalinar winces at this and thinks that it shouldn’t be made fun of this way, that it’s crass or wrong, Renarin has a disorder, it makes him weird and delicate, people shouldn’t joke around him with that, it’s not right. But Renarin is comfortable with it, and the Bridgemen are comfortable with him, which Dalinar obviously isn’t - though I get that he’s trying to go there. 

Then, again, we draw a very direct parallel between Renarin’s Radiant experience othering him socially and autism othering a person socially. Absolutely exquisitely done mister sando, very nice indeed. 

Renarin notes that there are ways to go through society. It’s nice to be like Dalinar and have the clout to buck the expectations, and not do what you’re supposed to, and still get away with it. Isn’t that nice? Bitch wrote and published a book and he’s still seen as masculine and worthy of respect and being yielded too. 

Remember that Renarin can read and write as well - he learned so he could interpret his visions. But he hasn’t shared that with people. Because he knows that it won’t be accepted the way Dalinar was. 

Sanderson sets up this idea rather nicely in Oathbringer, actually, with the scribes meeting. 

Renarin glanced at his father. Dalinar responded with a raised fist.

He came so Renarin wouldn’t feel awkward, Shallan realized. It can’t be improper or feminine for the prince to be here if the storming Blackthorn decides to attend.

 This part has always made my heart happy. Because it’s not just about Dalinar validating Renarin’s societally ‘feminine’ tendencies - which he gets subtly bullied/mocked for during that meeting by one of the other women in attendance. It’s about all of his differences, it’s about Dalinar validating his autistic experience as well, and helping to fit him in to a society that continually rejects and ousts him. 

This idea evolves through RoW, however, with Renarin understanding that Dalinar can do things that he won’t be allowed to get away with. Dalinar isn’t so much breaking down barriers with Oathbringer as he is stomping through them because he has enough social privilege to do so, for the most part, unscathed. 

Renarin keeps his reading a secret because, even after what Dalinar has done, it’s not going to change things for most men, and certainly not him. 

Renarin has learned, throughout his life, that him being different is not going to break down any barriers. People are not going to change their world, or their worldview, for him and his differences. He knows that he has to adapt, and he knows that he won’t be afforded the same luxuries as others. 

He’s more comfortable with this now. He’s learning to be himself, and learning that the world won’t fit itself to him, he just has to do what he’s going to do anyway, and find the places where he fits, rather than trying to change the ones where he doesn’t. It’s actually a really beautiful little arc, and I’m strongly tempted to look at it in more depth at some point. Renarin and Dalinar’s dynamic is actually incredibly deep, layerd, and complex, and it’s something I’ve been meaning to look at for a while. HOWEVER. NOW IS NOT THE TIME FOR THAT. 

TL;DR: Renarin’s Radiant experience is a direct allegory and parallel to his autistic experience. This is explored and made blatant by canon repeatedly, throughout the series, and Renarin’s experience as a Radiant is clearly a vessel by which Sanderson intends to explore his autism. Stop erasing and ignoring this when you talk about Renarin and analyse his arc. His autism is as intrinsic to this as it is to identity. It’s part of him. Stop erasing it.

I’m not saying you can’t find parallels or comfort in Renarin’s arc as a queer person. I’m just saying you cannot look at it in isolation. As though the text is ONLY making a parallel between his queer identity and his bond. Because it’s very fucking blatantly not. His autism is obviously and canonically tied to his Radiant bond and this is something that MUST be noted whenever you talk about this aspect of Renarin’s character.

Note: if anyone has any questions or comments on this, I am happy to engage and to clarify what I meant/add further detail and supporting evidence for various different aspects. There’s only so much I can cover in one post! For my sanity as well as yours...But there’s absolutely more, and I’m happy to look at that as well.

[nutellarchives]

My K-Dramas of June - August (First Half) part 1

As June marked the last month of my classes for the term, I grabbed the opportunity to marathon K-Drama as much as I can. With that goal in mind, I was able to finish 7 K-dramas and would like to give my thoughts with the following. This might be a spoiler full review-ish so disclaimer for that.

p.s. if you haven't watched all of the drama on the list, I recommend just scrolling past that title you haven't watch yet and go back to this blog post when you're already done!

p.p.s. Trigger warning too, I have watched some K-dramas that might be sensitive for others, please read with caution.

Tomorrow

The first K-drama I've watched last June was Tomorrow. I watched this in a whim because even though I have a lot to watch on my K-drama list, I am only comfortable watching K-dramas on mobile, so Netflix and Viu. It was newly released during the time I've decided to watch it and I've heard good things about it so I gave it a go without any information or a tiny bit of synopsis (just watching it blindly ehe). First few episodes and I'm already hooked! Since I am really interested into concepts where it's not part of my culture aka something new (e.g. Afterlife, Reincarnation, Grim Reapers etc.). Learning things about the East-Asian culture has always been a fascinating thing to me and I wanted to learn more.

This drama also touched one of the taboo topics in Korea, which is suicide. It is a very heavy topic to portray in media but I do think that they were able to nail it and was able to convey a message regarding suicide and how to overcome it.

The cast dynamics is one of the factors that made me continue to watch, although everyone is new to me, as I haven't watched any dramas that they starred in, I was able to enjoy their performance and how they are able to pull off each character.

What made me add this drama to my favorites list is how things were connected, how the character's attitudes and perception towards suicide is based on their experiences from their past lives and how the story intertwined with the character's pasts. I especially liked how Ryeon and Joong-gil were lovers in their past lives (even though this drama is not romance heavy, I still manage to get kilig during the time we're they were still together).

One thing that felt short for me is the lack of depth and focus on Junwoong's past life. I do think that him being in a comma for months in the present is a sad thing and I won't question that but regarding his past life, I feel like the integration of that is something that wasn't thought very well. I've expected Junwoong's past life to be more meaningful as he was one of the main leads. But I guess it won't really make sense if he is connected with the other lead's past lives as he just accidentally got into the squad. I honestly wish there was more to it but I'm gonna just accept that he did great things in the past and be contented with that.

A Korean Odyssey

After watching Tomorrow, I immediately started watching A Korean Odyssey. It is a fantasy, lil comedy, romance, horror-ish, star-crossed lovers K-drama. This drama has been added to my list for a bit, maybe a year ago, because of that short preview from Netflix and that intrigued me because of well... it's a bit of a jumpscare so I was curious. (If you have watched that preview video, you know what I mean plus I watched that like 10pm so it scared the sh** out of me)

All I can say is that this drama deserves more recognition. It's a good balance between the good stuff and the tragic happenings and it is also accompanied by a comedic relief which somewhat gave a light tone. It is romance heavy and when I say romance heavy I meant that kind of romance . The cast are all so good in portraying their characters and they aren't that forgettable. The actors really nailed their roles and it also added to the cohesiveness of the drama as a whole.

After watching this K-Drama, I have found another actor to look out for, which is Lee SeungGi. He is actually a household name in the Korean Media Industry and I have heard of him many times, due to the famous My Girlfriend is a Gumiho and him being able to sing, but this is the first time I've actually watched a drama that he is the main character. Given I've really liked his acting here, I've added him to my favorite actors list! which btw is non existent but let's pretend it does Because of that admiration of his performance, I did watched another K-drama that he starred in in this list.

I recommend this drama if you are looking for a binge-worthy fantasy with comedy, horror-ish and also tragedy on the side. However though, I'd say the ending is a bit unfortunate. It suggests a season 2 but 5 years after it's release, I doubt that there will be a season 2 unless...

Two Cops

While watching Tomorrow, I also watched this drama with a friend; Two Cops! I'd say its a fun watch, generic but still worth the time.

It's about a police and a con artist that got into an accident and then the con artist possessed the body of the police. Sounds scary? It's not under a horror genre though. The purpose of the unexplainable possession is to uncover the truth that lies between the two leads and the other characters related to them. This follows a similar structure of intertwined lives as they have crossed paths once just like tomorrow minus the past lives as this one is from childhood to adulthood.

It's my first time watching Jo Jungsuk even after the famous hospital playlist which btw I haven't watched yet. I like the duality in his role here and his performance is convincing. He has the serious side and the goofy side which I enjoyed watching. It's also fun to see Hyeri here as I haven't watched her in a while after dropping Reply 1988 please don't come after me, a lot has enjoyed that drama but during the time that I've watched it.. I just didn't feel it. She's still the goofy and fun Hyeri that I've watched in Reply 1988 though, which is not really bad but nostalgic. As for Seonho, I did watch this drama because of him. My friend was a super fan of this guy, we call this oppa (and our other oppas) samcheon, due to having 10+ age gap between us and our favorite actors, and I've decided to binge Seonho dramas with her to let the lady enjoy and as for me I wanted to see more of his acting.

This drama is okay though, not something that made my mind blown or something. As I've mentioned, it's generic but still worth watching especially to Seonho fans. Though I can say that I'm quite disappointed that Seonho had a lil less screen time compared to Jungsuk but nonetheless they both carried the show well.

Mouse

Here is another Lee SeungGi drama as promised, (from that A Korean Odyssey post). Mouse. After watching A Korean Odyssey and enjoyed SeungGi's performance, I followed it up with another one of his dramas.

Mouse is a thriller, mystery, twisty and dark drama about psychopaths and whether or not they are born not made. This drama focuses on discovering the Psychopath gene, due to Korea's advancing technology, a Doctor was able to detect a gene that is present among Psychopaths to fetuses. It is an interesting concept but as the disclaimer in every start of the episode, it is a work of fiction, so Psychopath gene ain't real hopefully.

I'd say throughout the whole 20 episodes that I've endured, it was interesting rather than enjoyable. Giving you a grave warning that this drama isn't for the light-hearted, it's always about murder and killings, since the story focuses on Serial Killers.

Aside from the serial killings and psychopaths, Of course it focuses on a handful of characters and let's the viewers know their inner conflicts and struggles. There's no room of certainty in this drama as every episode ends with a question.

After a few episodes, I thought that this drama would overthrow my favorite K-drama of all time which is Law School but after the second half, it didn't. I had high expectations with it but after answers were revealed, it felt confusing and overwhelming as for the first 14 eps, they left me with questions and suddenly they bombarded some answers which it was too much for me to comprehend. Adding to that, there were too many characters to focus on, though the main focus would be the two main leads, there were other side characters that are also related to the story line that were also given too much stress and that made the experience dense. I'd say 16 episodes would be sufficient as the duration of 20 eps felt dragging but alright I guess they need that many episodes for the narrative.

Overall, if you are ready for a heavy drama with killings involved, I recommend this. It will make you question whether what's shown is the whole picture or details were left out. Kudos to the actors, I can really feel their stress and conflicts.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

That would conclude the first part of this post. I decided that 7 dramas in one post might give a cognitive overload so stay tuned for the second part!

Thanks for making this far, it's a long post but I hope you find it interesting (or I hope it makes sense hehe).

Click here for part 2.

- ella

[lazzledazzler]

Lazzle's Rune Factory 5 Review

Alright so here are my thoughts and experiences with RF5! This is a big boy so buckle in earthmates...

Obviously this review will contain spoilers, read at your own risk.

Initial thoughts upon playing...

Great opening! I enjoyed the jazz music~ I did feel like it leaned a bit more towards the male player though. It definitely feels like a rune factory game. It's familiar, and controls are easy to get accustomed to for the most part. The mold is there and rf5 doesn't stray too far from its predecessors which is comforting for veterans. That being said, I'm not going to pull any punches and will critique this game harshly. Keep in mind as updates for the game are released not all things discussed in this review will be as relevant overtime!

Let's hear some thoughts on...

The story/plot. The plot is enjoyable overall. I'm not crazy about the whole Seed organization thing but it was a neat idea. They address the Sechs Territory and it is confirmed that the game takes place some decades after RF4. But by the end of it, I didn't feel like I really accomplished anything because it felt like I barely did anything really. Also they left a lot of stuff unanswered. I'm not even sure I understood the message they were sending, if they were trying to send a message at all. The main story is too short, and it doesn't involve enough of the townsfolk. You're basically doing everything yourself in secret the whole time and the townsfolk barely know what's actually going on. Out of the love interests, Lucas plays the largest part in the story, followed by Priscilla and Scarlett. The story feels targeted at male audiences--at least that's how I felt. You, the player, have a larger role in the game, much like in RF3 and I was glad to see this. As of right now there are only two arcs. Praying for DLC 3rd arc...!

Protagonists. The latest protagonists to join the crew of Earthmates are...decent. Their designs are nothing special unfortunately, though I appreciate Alice's more than Ares's. Appearance-wise they lack personality and creativity. Personality wise I am pleasantly surprised with how sociable they are. They're not exactly quick witted and sassy like Lest/Frey were in rf4, or as endearing as Micah in rf3, but they have a certain realness to them that makes their reactions to things believable. I'm certain Xseed will see to making them a bit more sarcastic in their localizing efforts, so let's all look forward to that. Overall though, while I appreciate their mannerisms, they don't really measure up to all the previous amnesiacs we've grown to love over the decades.

Characters. Overall I enjoy all the characters introduced in Rune Factory 5! I feel like there is someone for everyone in this game on some level. The voice acting was pretty good for every character. The designs are very much Rune factory. Like OG runefa, compared to rf4 ( 4 kind of strayed from their usual style) which I like. Characters still have their own signature quirks that you find endearing. Although I would have liked to see more variety? Like we've had mermaids, univir, half monsters, vampires, etc in previous titles but rf5 only gives us the usual (half) elf, dwarf, and then a succubus (physically she doesn't have unique features aside from the ears and heart eyes), and some were-people. I was hoping for something more unique to really give that classic runefa vibe.

Dungeons/Battles. I'm pretty split on this one. On the one hand, the dungeons have more depth due to the 3D aspects. They've included more contraptions that are very fun to see even if they aren't executed that well. So I'm grateful for that. On the other hand, the dungeons are insanely short imo. It doesn't take long at all to get to the boss. The puzzles are also pretty subpar and few compared to RF4. Fighting monsters is similar to the other games. You can lock on now but I only use it when I'm trying to use my Seed Circle. The lock on feature is actually counter-intuitive and makes it harder to dodge. Weapon mechanics have shifted a bit. There’s a feature that makes you invincible to damage if you time the R button dash correctly. Axes and Hammers are significantly slower than in older games? Like. I thought I was in slow motion it was so slow. Lances are also harder to use as well? I'm questioning my sanity here. I don't know if it's a bug or intentional either.

Farming. Not much has changed from previous games mechanics wise. They added new types of special crops which is neat. The camera view changes to overhead when you go near your fields though, and it can make you dizzy/uncomfortable. It actually makes it a bit difficult to see at times so I wish there was a way to adjust the angle. If you are tilling corn or dried weeds to improve the soil, you need to place them separately if you don't want to use the entire stack. Otherwise, it will till the entire stack on the land if you place them all down at once. The flower shop is unlocked late in the story. Weird thing to do considering you need flowers to make medicine. Not to mention the fact that you wont have access to the fertilizer that increases defense against typhoons? During typhoon season? Thinking emoji...

The town. I have to say Rigbarth's design is poor compared to Sharance, Selphia, etc. It's too big and it takes too long to get around. Everything is too spaced out and there aren't enough warp points to make it easier on players. I don't want to walk an entire mile up a hill to talk to one person and then walk all the way down to the beach to speak to another. It doesn’t really feel like a ‘town’.

OST/BGM. Music was good, though nothing really stood out to me where I'd go "damn this slaps" or something. I think they might've had some old soundtracks from rf2 or something because it felt really nostalgic at times.

We need an exterminator. (Bugs Bugs Bugs)

Marvelous, I don't know how to tell you this buuut...your customers are NOT your testers. When you release a game, you need to make sure it's not littered with glitches because customers don't enjoy dealing with them and will drop the game!

Here are some of the types of glitches I encountered:

Crashing. Game would randomly crash or freeze and close at any moment. Sooooo frustrating! Sometimes you get lucky with the autosave feature, but the autosave only activates every morning at 6am in your room and then when you warp to a dungeon level/floor. So when you're in the middle of your daily tasks in town and it crashes, you have to start all over. Marveloussss no one enjoys losing their progress in a game I promise you that much.

Lag. The dialogue bar is seriously slow, especially after loading your file. Crafting/Cooking screen lags. When you press the Y button to skip through dialogue it lags like hell. Pretty much after every time you load the game will lag, the audio will lag if you're in a battle, everything is just. so. slow.

Repeating dialogue. So if you close your game entirely (or if it crashes) naturally you'll reload your file to continue where you left off. There's a bug that will cause all NPCs to repeat the last dialogue that occurred from whatever plot related thing you did last. So for example, if the last thing you did in the story was unlock Ludmilla, everyone in town will naturally have some dialogue about her. But even after seeing all this dialogue and even saving, if the game is closed and reloaded you'll have to read all that dialogue again from townsfolk. It got really annoying after a while.

Monster taming. One time I tamed a monster but once I named it and hit 'ok' the monster never showed up in my barns? Just. gone. Okaaaay then...? Additionally, I expanded one of my monster barns but all of the monsters I tamed wouldn't appear in the added room. You get 4 monsters for each room but the monsters I tamed would show up in the original room. Meaning I had like 7 monsters in one room! I tried to bring them into the newly added room but they would just warp back to the other room. Sad.

Pond Glitch. I fished in the pond located in Sasayaki Forest and left the fish I caught but didn't want laying around the water's edge. If you leave fish around the pond's edge and go to sleep, the next morning you will be teleported to the pond and trigger the fairy dialogue as if you had thrown all of the fish into the pond??? So the dialogue of her telling you she wants 'X item, not this!' will trigger over and over for all of the fish you left at the water's edge. RIP.

Party member Bug. I had Martin in my party and I made him leave. Then when I went into my monster barns to get a monster pal to join me instead it showed me Martin's portrait???? Also I've encountered a bug where I can no longer ask anyone to join my party for some unknown reason. The R &L button prompt was just gone when I reloaded.

Errors. When cooking or crafting, the dialogue box shows up sometimes...

Typos. Random average typo here and there. Not a real biggie but there is one instance where the heroine will use the japanese male pronoun "boku" instead of "watashi" which really convinced me that this game was completely intended for men lol.

Let's talk about Pros

The good stuff. The stuff that makes you all warm and fuzzy inside.

Plot Advancing. Now I'm gonna put this as a pro because I'm certain the average player will enjoy this even though I do not. There are now markers on the map to show you where to go to advance the plot. This is all well and dandy, but it also made the story less appealing for me because you don't need to go around town and speak to residents for clues or assistance to advance anything in the story.

3D Graphics The 3D models are all amazing. The interior designs of the houses/buildings are also incredibly detailed and realistic.

Collecting items. Now there's a feature that will allow you to collect items into your inventory just by walking over them. This is pretty neat and welcome for the most part. Once the item is sparkling, you can walk over it and it'll go into your rucksack automatically. This also makes lumbering and mining go much faster. Yay!

The miraculous L pocket. Now you can customize the categories that appear in your L pocket by going to the rucksack tab in the menu. This is a super neat feature that makes things easier on players who want to manage their items in a format that suits them.

Weapon/Tool Toggling. You can now toggle between your equipped weapon and tool by pressing the left or right buttons on the trackpad.

Collecting lumber/material stone. Oh lord this is probably the most welcome improvement moving forward from the previous game. You can now put all of the lumber and material stone from your inventory into its storage at once. This also applies to fodder for tamed monsters. Well done Hakama.

Autosave. This feature is a welcome addition to the series. The game will save your data every morning and every time you enter a dungeon. Autosave has really saved my ass a few times when I made a huge error in judgement so I'm incredibly grateful for this feature. And it doesn't save over your actual save file--there's a separate autosave file at the very top. So if you messed up something but already saved on your main file, you can still salvage your mistake by reloading the autosave! I just wish it activated a bit more often sometimes.

Warping. Now we can warp to each level in a dungeon as well as certain places on the map in town. It's pretty convenient for the most part.

Increased party members. Now you can have up to 3 members in your party! Hooray! Party members act more intelligently than in older games. Scarlett can use the Seed circle to assist you in fights. I think she also tosses healing potions at you occasionally. So far, no one has tossed a dish at me if I haven't eaten like Kiel and Clorica did in rf4. But I have been hit by a failed dish (from reinhardt?) and a healing potion (from scarlett). Scarlett, Priscilla, and Reinhardt are the most helpful when dungeon crawling in my experience. Some of them however, (looking at you Doug) don't shut the hell up with their one line of dialogue they have and repeat it constantly.

Seed Circle. This neat feature allows you to capture monsters. By charging it and releasing you can capture monsters for the bounty system or add them to your party temporarily. If you throw it without charging it, you can stun monsters in place momentarily or grab things from far away. When stunning monsters, it can also give you the monster's drop item occasionally. Unfortunately it uses a lot of RP so it can be difficult at times.

Combo attacks. This is a neat feature that I appreciate and use often for boss fights. They do some serious damage so it's good to save them for the bosses. The actual cutscenes aren't that impressive, and feel kind of subpar when you get down to it but I think it's a start in the right direction.

Farm Dragons. I'm listing this as a pro although I really just see it as a new feature. Farm dragons have fields on their backs that you can place monster barns on and farm on. Giving them certain crystals will give your fields boosts in certain criteria, like length of growth, soil quality, you get it. I personally don't use the crystals because I couldn't give a shit lmao I have men and women to woo here. But if you're into this kinda thing then it's a pro.

Storage. When opening your storage box, fridge, etc. you can actually hit the R & L buttons to switch between ALL of your other storages. Looooove thissss. Great addition. So much faster to put items away in their respective places.

Crafting/Forging. Now we can also use the R & L buttons to alternate between the different weapon types/accessory/gear types instead of having to exit the menu and going back in each time you want to make something different.

Cooking. More recipes have been added. Yay!

Days are longer now. More time to get shit doneeeee ayyyy

Fishing. They've added many more fish to the game! Now the player will shout something when you get a bite, making it easier for you to hit B at the right moment. Nice. Also if you fail or press B too early, the fish doesn't vanish most of the time. Also nice. There is now a feature to fish with another person's assistance. Once a day you can investigate the sign near the fishing station and someone might offer to lend you a hand. Press the B button at the right moments on the slider and you can get a rare fish that can't be caught normally.

Monsters. New types of monsters! Love the designs. Even the monsters that are the same but just have different skins are really neat. They look great in the 3D format too. You can even ride with up to two people on certain monsters! Some bosses had awesome designs while others...were bad.

New Types of Furniture. The carpenter store has a wide arrange of furniture you can buy for your home. It also has wallpapers and stuff which is really neat. Though unfortunately you can't even sit on some of the furniture so that's a shame.

Events. Now there is a system where events are triggered by approaching an icon on the map. This is probably an improvement to RF4's randomized system, though personally I found it annoying because it meant that I had to see the events before I could just enter a building normally. Sometimes I just wanted to get shit done and not have to read through walls of text for someone's love event when I just want to buy something.

Voiced Lines. The protagonist seems to have more voiced lines, as do other characters. Good!

Let's talk about Cons

Not including glitches. Oh boy. So many cons. Where do I start?

Dialogue. Probably the most notable con in the entire game. The dialogue is drastically minimal in comparison to previous games, especially rf4. There is probably a quarter of the amount of dialogue compared to rf4's insane amount of content if not less. Townsfolk repeat themselves. Often. Too often. Am I playing Harvest Moon? Originally I thought it was because the dialogue is randomized, but I think it's actually because more dialogue is unlocked as you raise townspeople's FP. Despite this, there's no linear build up where you start off as acquaintances and eventually become very close like in rf4 because of how sporadic the LP/FP is. Townsfolk don't even talk to each other. One of the greatest perks about runefa is the conversations townsfolk can have with one another. Residents randomly gathering in small groups to talk about anything. Previously you could add someone to your party and sometimes a dialogue will occur if you speak to the right person at the right time with that person in your party. This is nonexistent now. The only time they do this in rf5 is during the festivals. But, it will only trigger if you have unlocked all the characters in each marriageable lineup and they can't be in your party. The residents will talk about one another but that's pretty much it outside of town events. They got rid of all the minor dialogue that occurs too. Trying to sleep in someone's bed while they're right there? They wont comment. Inspecting objects in stores while the shopkeeper is present? Wont say anything. Take a character with you to a dungeon/boss fight? Their lips are sealed. Where's my sense of community? :(

FP/LP This ties into the dialogue issue. The rate at which LP/FP increases is sporadic as hell. You can go from 1FP/LP to 4FP/LP just by giving a gift sometimes. I wouldn't even speak to people and their affinity increased by like triple for no reason. Then it increases by like 2% for the longest time. Argh!!!

Graphics. I don't consider myself very picky when it comes to graphics. I don't really mind that the foliage and scenery are at the level of a ps2 game at best. I tried playing on my television initially, but the lag and camera operability was too much so I fully switched (haha puns) to handheld. One thing that sucked is that I literally cannot tell the difference between medicinal herbs, antidote grasses, and green grasses without the captions because the graphics are so indistinguishable. So when you're trying to pick up multiples of those items by holding the A button, you're just randomly walking over anything green in the hopes that you'll get the right ones...

Lack of Sound Effects. Something I noticed is they got rid of the sound effects that will play when you complete a puzzle or add someone to your party. When you try to brush a monster there's no sound for the '♪' they make when you successfully brush them. So it was hard for me to tell if I had actually brushed them or not. I was a bit saddened by the lack of cute sounds.

Too much free range. From the very beginning of the game, you're allowed to go pretty much wherever you want when leaving town. It was too easy to stumble into high enemy level territory without knowing, so when I was like level 5 so I got KO'd immediately.

Artwork. The portraits seem to be lower in quality somehow. Runefa has always had shitty portrait art imo but this time it's even worse. Many character's eyes looked fucked up. Though the 3D models are insanely good for mostly every character except Terry. Terry's 3D model looks Terryfying and I prefer his portrait.

Festivals. They've added some new festivals. Some I enjoy. Some not so much. They changed the format of the eating contest. It's horrible. Good luck with that one.

L pocket + R button? They got rid of the feature that lets you skip to the other end of your items when opening the L pocket by pressing R button. I really liked that feature because it made it faster to reach my items so I was bummed that they got rid of it.

Gotta go fast. Now when you speak to someone, it doesn't 'stop time' as you might say it did in previous games. So people are still moving about as you speak to someone, making it harder to catch up to people! Annoying!!!

Catch and release? Not in my farming simulator! Say goodbye to being able to toss a fish you caught back into the water. In fact, say goodbye to tossing anything you don't want anymore into the water. Now you just have an army of fish flopping on the ground around you. And with the auto pick up feature, they're probably going to end up in your inventory anyways once you try to move. There are still certain ponds with fairies that you can toss stuff into, but you'll have to deal with the fairy harping at you for giving her something she doesn't want.

Shop Hours. Oh god. The shop owners don't even open their stores at the correct hours? It says open at 9am. If you speak to them they won't open their store until like 9:07??? But Priscilla and Lucy will show up to work their part-time jobs at around 8:30am and you can buy stuff through them before 9am. So the actual shop owners (for the bread shop and general store) are pointless usually. Additionally, if the store is empty (but open) you can no longer add a shopkeeper into your party and then enter their store with them to buy things from them. Why. Just why. When you want to buy something that only a specific person sells (Only Hina sells fish, only Heinz sells misc items) you have to wait for them to finally decide to work in their own store. Wonderful.

Monster Item drops. Maybe I'm crazy but the monster drops are seriously a lot harder to get than in previous games. Especially boss drops. It's almost impossible to get the rare drops now. I don't even want to try anymore. And as far as I know, the only place to buy monster items is through Heinz, but his items are actually misc. items, not specifically monster drops. So you'll be lucky to check his store (whenever tf he decides to actually work) for any monster items you might want instead of farming for the drops. Sighs.

Difficulty. This game is too easy. There is little to no challenge whatsoever. I had to increase the difficulty setting to hard mode and it was still too easy. I beat it at level 139, never once did I need to grind or level. In fact, your character levels up way too quickly for the pace of the story. I had zero trouble with any of the bosses and even the final boss was a breeze. Quite sad. Though because I am not new to the franchise, it's likely that newcomers would have some trouble in the later parts of the story.

Fishing cons. Idk how you fck up fishing but they sure did. You have to stand further back now because the pole is so long that you'll miss the fish you're aiming for. In fact, it's seriously hard to aim period. You'll end up recasting more often than not. Fish come in the various sizes but they don't seem to have the darker or faded characteristics that can indicate whether it's a rare fish or not. The graphics make it hard to tell. The pros that i've already mentioned are welcomed but it doesn't negate the fact that I do not enjoy fishing like I did in previous games.

Mining/Lumbering Cons. You can no longer strike three times consecutively when mining/lumbering. This sucks lol. Even when you upgrade your axe or hammer, powering up the tool does nothing for getting wood and material stone--it only expands the area of your strike. So it takes longer to get wood/stone from stumps and rocks now since you have to strike the full 9 times but it's not too bad. It's also harder to aim now as well so that's also unfortunate.

Seasonal Fields? Kiss them goodbye! That's right, there are no seasonal fields in rf5 because devs are insane! You instead have the farm dragons that seem to look seasonal based on the fact that they are designed after elements like earth, water, and fire. But no, these dragons are simply extra fields for you to use. Here's a spoiler: you're not going to use those fields. You're just not. They're kinda useless unless you're obsessed with farming. Now you have to grow your crops out of season like the sad farmer that you are.

Farming cons. Seeds no longer tell you how long it takes to grow the crop. Why. As of June 29th, they fixed this with an update. But I still had to play the whole game without it so fuck you marvelous. The joystick is really sensitive? So when you're trying to use a fertilizer or something on your field you're likely to place it on the wrong 4x4 tile, wasting your fertilizer. So it’s best to hold down the R button when farming. Also the crops look uglie as hell.

Sleeping and warping cutscenes. Just like in rf4 there's a cutscene when you go to sleep that can be skipped easily by pressing A. In rf5, there's a cutscene to sleep and a cutscene when waking up. It takes a bit more than a second to skip these scenes so it gets annoying after a while. Warping is this new feature that replaces our beloved escape spell. Overall I appreciate the feature but I hate it for two reasons. One: there's an annoying ass cutscene for it each time you use it that could be much shorter. And Two: townsfolk now use warp even when inside the town. In previous games, someone exiting your party in town would just manually run to wherever they need to be. So you could easily chase after them if you need to talk to them or give them something. Now, party members use warp regardless of where you are at the time. So say you have someone at 7 hearts and you want to try confessing to them. You would have them join your party, save your game, and then have them leave your party and immediately speak to them and confess before they can run off. If it doesn't work you reload until it does. In RF5 this wouldn't work anymore because they will warp. Now you would have to save, run around town trying to find this person and hope they accept the confession. Otherwise you'll have to play hide and seek again because reloading your file will randomize the resident's locations (if they are not working in a shop)!!!! I often just waited until a festival day because then they will be at the plaza for most of the day and it has a warp point there.

Crafting/Forging/Cooking. They've removed the feature where you can press Y on the ingredients in the menu to add more of that particular item. I miss this feature :'(

Lacks incentive. There is no trophy room from my knowledge. The final dungeon that is meant to be like the sharance maze/rune prana isn't that hard to beat for skilled players and is only 20 floors. After you beat the main story and this dungeon there's not much else to do really.

Request Board. Unlike in rf4, you need to make sure you have accepted requests before you complete them or else it will not count. Previously, you could complete all sorts of tasks and Eliza would still recognize your work even if you accept their request after the fact. ie, shipping goods, harvesting crops, etc. So make sure you don't harvest your special crops before accepting the request it's for!

Return of the "Loli" Dragons... Yeah you read that right. We got more dragons in children's(???) bodies with skimpy clothes. I don't know anymore????¿¿¿

Can't marry the Milfs or Dilfs. Tragic.

Still no homo. Grow up Marvelous.

Reverse Proposal? Reverse Uno card-- Laid low by the patriarchy. You now have to buy the double bed and craft an engagement ring to propose to your man if you're playing as Alice. Marvelous this isn't what we meant when we said we wanted equal rightsssssss This can be seen as a pro if you're a softhearted babey who doesn't like rejecting bachelors' proposals because you feel bad :'( But this is a con for me because I don't want to spend money and materials on a double bed dammit!!!

Misc. Still can't stack dishes or fish. There's no green elemental fairy???All the other elemental ones are there except the green one? why??? Still can't tame the giant Wooly. Some bosses that have insanely awesome designs cannot be tamed and makes me wanna eat glass.

Let's talk about Love~

Relationships. We want them. And half of us only play these games for them. I've only played as the female heroine so far but I'll be updating this review as soon as I finish with the bachelorettes as the male hero.

Confessions

As usual, we must raise the love points of our beloved to 7 hearts before we can attempt to date them. However unlike in rf4, if you fail at a confession once, you will need to raise the LP up an entire level before you can try again with any chance of success. It's imperative you save before attempting a confession now.

Love Events

Each love interest has two love events that must be seen before you can date them. They're reminiscent of older game's style but I felt they could have been a biiiit more interactive or so? Or involved the town a bit more for some of them.

Dating

Once you get your honey to be your bf/gf, you get to choose the nicknames as usual. Then you can go on dates. The first three (non-festival) dates are actually events. You need to see all three events to get married.

Marriage Event

The final event you need to clear before you can marry your sweetie. In my honest opinion, so far for the boys, these events were rather disappointing. They lacked the drama and angst that sort of 'test' the love between the two when compared to rf4. Also this is a huge con for me personally and a minor spoiler but there are no special cutscenes at the end of the marriage event like in rf4. Instead, the cutscene takes place during your actual wedding. I was saddened by this because it took away the depth from the marriage events and the actual character? As it is just a cut and paste type of thing instead of an original cutscene for each person. They lack individualism this way. Also it kinda felt like a way for devs to avoid gay relationships and cut corners :^/....sus.

First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes...

Children!!!!!! This is actually one of the coolest additions in the game. Just like in rf3, you can have up to 3 children again! Your first child will resemble you, and you will have the option to choose its gender as well as its personality. There are 6 different children, (3 boys and 3 girls), all with different hairstyles, mannerisms, and seiyuus. Your answers will determine which child you get. A year after your first child is born, you will get the option to have a second child. You'll end up with twins, both resembling your partner. You won't get to choose the genders (it will be a boy and girl) but you will get to choose the personalities once more. The children all have canon names too and each kid is incredibly cute. And of course, you're still able to take your kid with you in your party~ ...Though you can only take one kid with you at a time.

So is RF5 good?

Yeah it's a fun game! My theory is that Marvelous forced the devs to release the game earlier than they were ready for, and that's why it's so lacking. But that doesn't mean it's not worth playing! I'd rate it 3.5/5 stars hehe. Not nearly as good as RF4 (full stop 5/5), or RF3 (4/5) but enjoyable nonetheless. I wouldn't recommend it as a first game to play from the series for newcomers though, I feel it's best for vets who can overlook all the cons thanks to loyalty and nostalgia. By the time it’s released in the West, the bugs should all be dealt with too.

So! Definitely buy this game! We want the series to continue and we want RF6 to be better than this--and hopefully Marvelous will make sure of that next time. If you're not a picky person I think you'll enjoy rf5 a lot. If you're like me and have high standards then, well, still pick it up and let it run its course. Then dust off rf4sp and cleanse your gaming palette >;^)

[letteredlettered]

Hi! I love your work and wish you all the best. I made my first fandom friend last year and I felt that at some point, we were really close - having in-depth conversations on a variety of topics (philosophy, movies we’d both watched and dissect what happened, share intimate personal details about our family backgrounds and dynamics, story ideas) while keeping our names and identities pretty vague. We’d chat online (through texts) a few hours a week and rarely did a span of a few days (1/2)

(2/2) go by without some message being sent. We’d share little pictures of places we’d go to (without any identifying features so generally just really pretty nature shots) and stuff like that. I always really looked forward to our conversations, and the stuff that we would learn together through our discussions with one another - different aspects of topic that weren’t as obvious before, different points of view, etc. In the past few months we’ve texted less (a little something every few days

(3/?) few days and the texts have gotten less frequent. It’s from no lack of interest on my part because I am very happy to converse with this friend. And then a few weeks ago, they’ve stopped texting to me entirely, although our shared social media platform makes it very obvious that they have been online a lot of times. Basically —> I’ve been ghosted.

The rest of this ask is under a cut, because it's long. I reproduced the ask in its entirety and then answered. It's about someone being ghosted and how they feel about that. I didn't answer privately because they didn't request it, and you can't answer anonymous asks privately.

(4/?) and of course it is entirely in their right to interact with whomever they wish, so I’m happy that they are taking care to spend time in a way that feels more meaningful to them and with people that they share a closer bond with. But I also feel like I’ve lost something special (I should mention that I texted them three messages over the course of the few weeks, so I’m pretty sure this is intentional. I’m not going to send any more because I don’t want them to feel uncomfortable)

(5/?) But i do feel sad because I did really care about the discussions we’ve had and my friend themself, even though we never revealed a lot of identifying details. Personally my anonymity made me a lot more candid and open to sharing thoughts that I may not in any other context (for ex: my questioning over my sexuality, which I had never and continued not to have said anything about to anyone)

And perhaps I shouldn’t have felt so emotionally invested, but that’s only because I know the state of our friendship now (and have more of a sense of their investment in it) to evaluate it that way, retrospectively. I really did appreciate this friend and feel a bit down about it, so I was wondering if you had any similar fandom friendship stories or any other thoughts?

Thank you, by the way, for reading such a long long ask. I felt like confessing this to you because I really love the interpretations and emotions you convey through the stories I’ve read and the meta writing thoughts you’ve mentioned in this tumblr, and so I respect your opinion. Anyway, please feel free not to respond (whatever is most comfortable) and thank you again

I'm really sorry that this happened to you. I can't say I have any similar fandom friendship stories, but that doesn't mean I can't deeply sympathize. I do know what it's like to lose a friend, and it sounds to me like you either lost one or feel like you lost one, which is the same thing. I know that's a really hard experience, and the hardest part for me has always been wondering what happened. I know this is really hard, and you have a right to be upset and feel badly. You also had a right to be emotionally invested--online friendships are just as real and true as other friendships, and sometimes even more intense because they involve only communication, rather than a lot of outward trappings. I'm sorry again for what you're going through.

You asked if I have other thoughts, so I suppose now it's time to confess that I don't really have similar fandom friendship stories because I am typically the one who ghosts people. I'm not proud of this. While I'd like to tell you a few things about why it happens or how it feels for me, it's not at all meant as a defense for what that person did to you. It's not at all meant to trivialize or negate the loss you have experienced. But maybe, by sharing why someone might act that way, it can at least help you work through what happened and/or process.

I really struggle with keeping up relationships. I think it's one of the main hardships of my life, and one of my largest sources of anxiety and guilt. I can't say I enjoy people on the whole, but there are quite a few individuals I like, and a subset of those individuals are people I love dearly and want to keep in my life. But I can't say I miss those people. I can't say I find myself deeply desiring their company. In fact, I can't say I ever desire to be around anyone. I literally never feel lonely. I literally never feel bored. I am my best company and entertainment.

But I learned quite early on in life that though I never wanted to be around anyone, I needed to be around people. When I spend too much time on my own, I grow anxious and depressed. This anxiety and depression doesn't make me want to be around people--quite the opposite. It makes me want to be around people even less. People, and socializing with people, starts to seem like more and more of an effort.

The pandemic was particularly hard for me because I enjoyed it so much. It was the perfect excuse never to see anyone, never to do anything, and I have spiraled these last two years into a fairly deep pit. And even though I knew this about myself--I knew how damaging it was for me to be alone too much--I was still surprised when over the last two months, when I finally started to go a lot of places and do a lot of things in public, I finally started to care about my life again in a way I just couldn't before. And note that caring about my life didn't at all mean I suddenly wanted to hang out with people; I just finally started wanting things for myself, to do things and plan things and build things. I was a sudden font of creativity when before nothing seemed worth the effort.

So when I say I want people in my life, I mean that I need them to stay sane. And since I have to be around people to be sane, I might as well be around the people I really enjoy--because I do enjoy people's company; I just never desire it. When I'm with people I like and love, I get these happy bursts of contentment. I'm a lot more likely than most people I know to suddenly announce, "I love you," and "I really like you," and "I'm really glad we're friends" at random times, I think because I always feel surprised. I feel surprised when I'm with people, because I almost feel like I don't or can't love when I'm alone, like people are distant and removed, objects that just don't impact my life that much. But they do, and I have to remember that. I have to remember, because my feelings won't remind me.

So it's a real struggle to maintain relationships when literally none of the impulses are there--I don't miss my friends. I don't suddenly wish I was with them. I do think about them all the time, but it never really occurs to me to reach out to them, to call or text or email or ask to hang, because their company never feels necessary or even desired. I respond to their texts and emails and calls and requests out of a sense of responsibility, the responsibility I have to maintain relationships, so people can understand that I love them and want to be with them, even though it's a struggle for me to feel that way unless I'm with them. And I have to remind myself of this responsibility, of this necessity. I have to remind myself that I do love, quite intensely, that I would be sad to lose someone I love, and that in order to keep people I love, some obligations are required, and those obligations will ultimately make me feel good too, even if I never think to want them.

Okay, so that's me. Then there's fandom, which is different. I have never had to work to be interested in fictional characters and fictional worlds. Things that are not actual or concrete have always interested me more than the real world; I've always preferred thinking about things to the things themselves. I'm not sure it's the healthiest way to live, and yet it feels very deep and intrinsic to who I am, and I'm not really sure I want to change it. I do think I can work on noticing and loving both my body and the real world around me--I think my girlfriend really helps me do that, which is amazing. But my interest in fictional things means I never have to work to stay engaged when I am immersed in a fandom. It feels really natural to me.

I don't know why, but for some reason, I've never been able to maintain interest in a fandom for more than a few years. There are some fandoms I return to over and over--HP being a huge one, but Jane Austen, Star Wars, and Buffy the Vampire Slayer are a few others. Whether I'm getting invested for the first time or re-invested, however, the interest really only lasts maybe 2 months to 2 years.

The result is that I could get very invested in a fandom, which would include making lots of fandom connections or even friends. While the impulse to connect with these people is fandom-related, I'm also intensely interested in them as people. I remain so after my interest in the fandom has faded--but sadly, the impulse to keep reaching out, or to reply to messages, fades with the fandom. It's not because I like them less, now; I just don't have that other force driving me. It gets harder and harder to reply. It gets harder and harder to explain that I am a freak who can't maintain normal human friendships. (I understand I'm not a freak, but this makes me feel like one.) It gets harder and harder to deal with the guilt, and letting someone down. It gets easier to just walk away from the friendship entirely, because the struggle to maintain it is so nerve-wracking and difficult.

This happens even sometimes when I have not lost interest in the fandom, or when the initial connection is not driven by being in the same fandom at the same time--I made several good friends through HP fandom even in pockets of time when I wasn't particularly obsessed with HP, for instance. But the fact that we have fandom in common really drives some of the initial interactions and excitement, and makes it feel easy to strike up a friendship. Then it becomes hard again, and I fail.

The worst part is yes, they can see me if I go online. But being online can be both a solitary experience and a communal one, and sometimes I am here to be by myself, and sometimes I am here to talk to people I like. More often it's the former--even doing things like answering asks or talking on message boards feels solitary, because it's talking to strangers, which means I have no real personal stake in the matter. Just because you see that your friend is active online doesn't mean that the friendship meant more to you than it did to them.

Again, I'm not making excuses. I've worked on this and gotten much better over time. These days, when I really hit it off with someone, I generally warn them that I'm not good at emailing or staying in touch, and that if I don't reply it's not because I don't like them. I let them know that most people who remain friends with me do so because they are persistent and don't get too discouraged if I don't reply several times in a row. And I'm lucky--I have friends who are willing to email me over and over, over the course of several months. I have a friend I haven't talked to in two years who still just occasionally leaves me voicemails, saying she knows I only make rare appearances, but she's still my friend and still wants to hang out whenever I'm ready. These are the friends I can have, people who are willing to do this, and I'm deeply grateful that anyone loves me enough to be patient with me, because I find this whole situation truly soul-crushing.

The other thing I will say is that yes, I have also slipped out of touch with people because they were making me unhappy, or I didn't like them as much as they liked me. Some I ghosted because I stated my boundaries and they still broke them, so telling them I didn't want to be friends anymore didn't really seem effective, given that they hadn't listened to my other requests. But some I ghosted because I didn't feel the need to explain, and they never asked.

I can't really offer advice, but if the person who ghosted you is anything like me, it would help to wait a month or two, and then message again, and say something like, "Hey, I really enjoyed talking to you. Even though we don't talk anymore, I wanted you to know I'm thinking about you and hope you're doing well." That kind of message feels like forgiveness to someone like me, who gets really wrapped up in the idea that I'm a terrible person who doesn't deserve friendship because sometimes I can't answer emails. Especially getting it a few months later really helps me move past the guilt that was killing me for so long.

That said, I would never want anyone to send that message to me if they would feel horrible if I still didn't reply to it, because I might not. Sometimes, I just can't. But anyway, what I'm trying to say is that it's entirely possible someone backed off because they just didn't want to pursue the friendship with you any longer, but it's also possible they're just a little fucked up in the way I'm a little fucked up, in which case, it's nice to hear a while later that someone still cares.

I hope this makes sense and doesn't put any additional pressure on you in any way. I'm really sorry about what happened to you, and thank you for sharing. I'm sure many people can identify with a story like yours--and I'm also sure many people can identify with a story like mine. I wish you all the best.

[lemonluvgirl]

Hi there, my friend,

What a great thing you started here 😘 It’s great to spread fandom love!

My favorite and most memorable story of yours is Blazing Free [spoiler alert for those who haven’t read it or are still reading!].

Blazing Free is such an emotional roller coaster I don’t even know where to start. I have images in my head from that story like the sheets of Peeta’s bed, Katniss talking about the “sweater” with her mom, the mutts at the cave when Peeta’s father sacrificed his life, the death of Laurel and the state of Rye after, Katniss comforting Peeta at the pool in the cave, etc. Many, many things. You paint such vivid pictures with your words and evoke deep emotions that I was glued to each chapter. And then I need to take a break because I want to savor what I just read. You’re that good, my friend.

The way you write and expound on each character and their relationships is well thought out. You make me hate a character but later on, love them because you make me see their perspective that I end up empathizing with them. I think Blazing Free is the story where I saw so much complexity in Katniss and Gale’s relationship. You keep it Everlark, of course, but you preserve all relationships or give them a good threshing out. I don’t know if I am making sense right now. I am just amazed at how you write character growth and intricacies!

The other story I also really love (honestly, though, I love them all!) is Katniss Everdeen Measured in 5 Decades. I know it’s only one chapter, but I truly enjoyed it because of the tenderness of Everlark. The fic aesthetic was also perfect! That’s one thing you are so good at too!

I couldn’t possibly leave out Promise Me, Little Brother =) I await their growth and eventual HEA. That story is such a slow burn! Hilarious in parts too. You’re just so versatile!

Above and beyond your stories, though, what I really value about you are your encouraging words. I’ve said it many times, but I will never tire of saying it -- you make me feel good about my writing and want to continue it. I always have this nagging doubt in my head if I should be writing at all, given my lack of experience and real-life situations. You somehow give me the right motivation at the right time. I’m happy when I write, I can’t explain it, but it also makes me feel guilty because, in my head, I could always be doing something else for the people around me. I am a workaholic, lol. Getting kind words and appreciation are medicine for the soul. A fantastic bonus in my daily life.

Thank you so much for your friendship and your stories, @lemonluvgirl87 ❤️🙏🥰

These flowers are for you. I picked them this morning 🥰

Oh my gosh! I was not expecting that beautiful of a response! I honestly wasn't expecting a response at all! Thank you so much for your kind words and in depth analysis of all the things you liked about my stuff! I too struggle with feelings of doubt about my writing and insecurities. But friends and fellow writers like you give me such encouragement!!! Just like you said, to keep writing, and keep reaching out to my fellow writers and creators in the community! Thank you again, I can't express how much this meant to me.

[crimeronan]

Can you explain the appeal of Julian Blackthorn? This is a genuine question because I read the books and came away utterly bored by him and unconvinced of his moral greyness as opposed to like, Adam Parrish’s. He seemed so one dimensional to me but I want to know if I’m Wrong TM considering I tend to be very very biased toward my favourite characters and bored by the rest, and my favourites were Mark and Kieran. So maybe I just didn’t pay him enough attention??

it’s been a while since i wrote any earnest tsc meta but cringe culture is dead and the chance to infodump about my julian thoughts has me vibrating where i’m sitting so.  yes okay.

technical stuff

(aka: things pertaining to How The Story Is Constructed)

cassandra clare’s characterization has become much stronger just in general since she first began writing the series like twenty years ago

perhaps most importantly: the more recent stuff i’ve read from her has involved characters who actually grow, change, and learn from their past mistakes 

rather than repeating the same stupid decisions over and over again

and over and over and over some more

seriously take a shot every time someone in tmi miscommunicates or self-destructs in ways They Have Learned Not To Do for no real reason. u will die of alcohol poisoning

in tda this shines ESPECIALLY with the evolution of mark, kieran, and cristina’s relationship, but that’s a separate post

clare’s trademark is also the angsty traumatized jerkass love interest with a secret heart of gold

the woman is almost singlehandedly responsible for draco in leather pants and the proliferation of this kind of character type in fandom and teen lit. this isn’t a criticism it’s me marveling at how if you commit hard enough to a single trope you truly can change the world.  follow your dreams

sad jackass with a heart of gold isn’t an Inherently Problematic Character Type

but poorly done it can lead to relationship dynamics in which one partner is constantly being hurt by and then forgiving the other despite them making no real effort to change, because they are narratively absolved due to being sad

(there’s a lot of this with earlier jace content.  in some ways i think will was later created specifically to be a same-archetype protagonist who actually does get called on his shit and grow. that’s also another post)

also if all of your sexy male love interests are tortured jackasses with a heart of gold then people start calling you a one-trick pony

enter julian blackthorn!

from the very start everything about him is designed to be the INVERSE of the heart of gold jackass.  which immediately makes him interesting just from a meta perspective

(mark and kieran are also both alternate angles on this time-honored archetype.  mark gets the heart of gold and kieran gets the jackass and then they’re both much more deeply messy than that.  yet another post)

julian is kind, self-sacrificing, empathetic, artistic, emotionally supportive, responsible, and favored by old grannies everywhere

so a completely nonthreatening milquetoast guy, right

immediately forgettable if you’re only here for the dramatic conflicts and shithead antics of clare’s other protags

except that he is A Mess

and that he has structured his priorities very carefully, and they are as selfless as you expect from The Hero (TM) but they are also Not Heroic (TM) and they do not align with the moral framework The Hero (TM) is supposed to use

moral ambiguity in characters always exists in relation to their narratives imo. you mention adam parrish - trc’s narrative already mucks around in different ethical shades of gray, and adam falls on the canon scale about where julian does on his canon scale.  both more willing than the average pov character to do the ruthless thing or make the fucked-up choice if the ends justify the means; both with an intensely strong sense of internal priorities that they adhere to at all costs, both so unbelievably fucking down for murder; etc

i do think there are ways julian’s choices could have been pushed even further, but considering the number of readers who hate his guts already, i can see why clare opted not to go for the most controversial possible conflicts

so we’re flipping the narrative

instead of seeing this angsty bad boy and peeling back the layers of his trauma to find his heart of gold, we’re seeing the put-together selfless family man and peeling back the layers of his Responsibility Mask to expose the rotting husk underneath

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

THAT IS FUN AS FUCK

then when julian DOES lash out in hurtful, uncontrolled ways, he has significantly more narrative justification for it than most of clare’s protagonists (will elaborate in characterization thoughts)

julian is also interesting as fuck because of how his struggles allow for a more in-depth look at the failings of shadowhunter society, something that’s also sorely lacking in clare’s earlier work

his apparent amorality is simply the result of him making pragmatic and impossible choices because he has been faced with fucked-up ethical dilemmas since age 12 Because Society Has Failed Him

which opens the door for narrative exploration of how and why he’s been failed so badly & what needs to change

i also love that he has such a coldly calculated way of analyzing situations and allowing harm to occur when need be, bc a lot of clare’s early protagonists have such a bad case of Rush In And Get Myself Killed Because I’ve Got Feelings About Impulsive Heroism syndrome that i wanna push them in front of a truck

probably there’s other meta narrative stuff i could say but i’m stopping myself and moving on to character analysis

characterization stuff

(aka: reasons why i’m also attached to him in a vacuum)

i don’t read him as one-dimensional at all tbh

u may feel the narrative pushes “ruthless julian blackthorn” too much without delivering enough actual ruthless julian But i don’t think that’s the same as having only one dimension

from the get-go, the big question centered on julian is always “how far are you willing to go?” and the narrative pushes the stakes slowly higher and higher to continuously test julian’s “the price is always justified” mindset

he has a far more layered and realistic response to trauma than clare’s early protagonists - trauma affects every single aspect of his personality and how he conducts himself, and the effects vary depending on the circumstances

his conviction that he has to be the perfect parent to his siblings because they will fall apart if they see him show weakness??  rooted in how he feels like he’s fallen apart since losing the stable adult support he once relied upon

his willingness to hurt semi-innocent people, commit coldblooded murder, manipulate people using political leverage, allow harm to befall any stranger if it protects his family??  rooted in how he has already had to ask himself how much he’s willing to sacrifice, and how his family is his only source of stability when the world has never done Shit for him

his conviction that he has a darker heart than anyone else because he killed his possessed father, even though intellectually he knows he was saving his brother’s life??  rooted in having no means of processing this trauma and being unable to voice his feelings for fear of backlash from a deeply non-understanding society

the way he represses every single negative emotion he ever has, to the point where emma - his actual literal magic soulmate who can feel his emotions - is startled to find him hurting or angry??  once again all about how he has to be the perfect father or he’s failed completely

the way his anger is so totally disproportionate to different situations and the way his negative emotions can only come out in completely uncontrolled breaks??  all that repression baybey.  this kid has not processed a single bad feeling in five years.  every single real grievance and petty annoyance has been festering indefinitely inside him like a slowly spreading infection

julian’s arc involves him needing to get thru being his worst self to actually start to heal

as in, he has to actually learn to acknowledge his feelings, take care of himself, lean on his family, and let other people take some responsibility

he also has to learn that in his quest to be the perfect emotionally controlled authority figure, he has not actually learned how to control or deal with his emotions. like. At Fucking All. good god

the narrative setup is also about asking “how far are you willing to go?” until the answer is finally “not this far.  not this far”

and once he reaches that point, he has to reevaluate everything about how he weighs his priorities and morals and plans, etc

(i also like that emma has a perpendicular arc in which she’s always the one tempering julian and telling him “no we can’t go that far” until she’s willing to do something horrific that he absolutely won’t and HE has to stop HER. very sexy)

it’s also just really nice to have a character who’s learned to relate so well to literally every single member of his family while still having a very detached ruthless interior consciousness. i have similar feelings about how adam teaches himself to love people, but with julian it’s spelled out more explicitly in canon & it’s a more central character theme

i’m sure i’m also forgetting stuff here but this post is long enough so i’m gonna say good enough

and like i said in the tags on my other post, there are things i’d personally write differently if it were my story - plot points i’d shift, character contrasts i’d up, themes i’d explore differently, pacing i’d adjust, etc.  i have plenty of ways i could be nitpicky and editorial about the effectiveness of julian’s arc.  but i also don’t feel like writing them out at the moment & none of my critiques on effectiveness have an impact on the core appeal of his character 2 me.  he’s so fucking good

[reshirement]

loose timeline bullet-list for spacehobbits!au

elves and dwarrow are the first species from middle earth into space due to a similar technological curiosity, and are quick to develop a relatively stable interstellar economy through trade (orcs appear several centuries behind and, still openly hostile and therefore unwelcome both in and nearby the territories of both races, are generally unable to retain any solid territorial footholds themselves for long, and generally cause trouble mostly through piracy and mercenary work)

khazad dum is the first major dwarrow planetside colony in space, its rapid expansion due to the discovery of mithril, an extremely versatile material when it comes to building advanced technologies, and combined with the minds of dwarrow engineers, is largely responsible for launching the dwarrow forward in their development of useful technologies by several centuries

mithril is a good bargaining chip, as its versatility removes much of the usual strain for resources it’s extremely valuable on its own, and as neither dwarrow or elvish technologies are shared cheaply, the economy remains competitive and relatively stable for a time

the planetside dwarrow colony of erebor is founded in another star system (one that’s very close to elvish territory) due to its high probability of containing mithril, causing a slight rift between the races (basically the dwarrow were like ‘is anybody gonna settle that’ and didn’t wait for an answer, which the elves really don’t like but since no direct claim had been made by them previously for the territory, there isn’t much to be done without starting a war)

the generally plentiful mithril reserves are further bolstered by the mines of erebor (and then further still when other planets in the system show further sources), the prices lower a decent amount, though the elves do not return the favor (the dwarrow are unhappy with this, though they are wealthy enough that it doesn’t matter too much, but if this was a game made by telltale, a little ominous bubble of ‘the dwarves will remember this’ would definitely appear)

hobbits are discovered by gandalf, who shares the knowledge with the white council, and the decision is made to keep them generally unknown and therefore protected

the colony of khazad dum is lost to a balrog lurking within the depths of the planet, and is subsequently abandoned, taking a decently sized chunk out both the dwarrow population and their mithril stores, upsets trade severely for a time

prices raise again, in a rapid attempt to bolster their economy following the tragedy, elves drive their own prices even higher in turn, this creates some more bad blood, though they’re still rich in mithril stores with erebor’s territory

humans arrive, a couple thousand years after the elves and dwarrow first pushed into space, and as their desire for expansion is rooted more firmly in the issue of overpopulation rather than intellectual pursuits, they settle into the economy, providing lower-end services such as trading operatives, vessels used for shipping and trade, dock workers, etc, for much cheaper prices than what both dwarrow and elves might offer

the dwarrow are the first to capitalize on this, providing an array of lesser technologies (though still better than what the humans possess) for generally fair prices and services, creating a strong tie between them. trade with the elves doesn’t become uncommon for either race necessarily, but it does fall a bit by the wayside, their lifespans and corresponding level of skill factored perhaps too permanently into their prices (think like, if you just want a burger, you COULD spend $50 down the street at the fancy place and hopefully get some masterclass chef stuff, OR you could just go to mcdonald’s and spend $4 and still be just as full at the end) and you know the drill, ‘the elves will remember this’

under thror’s rule, the dwarrow become the stable center of interstellar commerce, the area around erebor the most diverse and high trafficked in the cluster

the larger space station named dale is completed, giving the humans a both cultural center and active trading hub within erebor’s territory, furthering relations between the two species

accumulated bad blood between elves and dwarrow and the blossoming friendship with the humans has understandable effects on trade within the cluster, the dwarrow charge much higher prices for their mithril when dealing with elvish merchants, and while the elves are self sustainable in a way that humans cannot boast, they still desire the material greatly (and already feel a bit cheated by the dwarrow settling erebor), and will pay for it, though the tensions between them bubble with a more outward hostility

tensions remain at an all time high, and the elves retreat almost entirely from the economic trading system

thror’s suspicions begin to grow with the elves’ sudden lack of interest, security is tightened to prevent any possible move to usurp their economic position

the elves’ general disappearance also fosters a less healthy relationship for humans with the dwarrow, as the dwarrow begin to lean into the human’s dependence on the dwarves for trade, and before long under thror’s rule prices begin to steadily rise (this creates some amount of civil unrest for both dwarrow and humans, tightly wound as they are) and over time their economic relationship with humans also begins to sour

subtle counter offers from elvish territories begin to pull human attention away, and, though dale still functions and functions well (for now) a large portion of humans begin to move out of the territory, thror’s anger at this (expected, technically, if not in that manner) turn of events leaves him refusing to lower prices or provide alternative options, and while the dwarrow remain a large part of trade and are still generally self-sufficient through mithril, the ereborean economy loses much of its hard won stability

destabilization attracts pirates, mercenaries, and soon rumors tell of the occasional pack or orcs or worse that linger just outside claimed territory, preying on trading vessels and travelers alike

the modest human colony of esgaroth is developed within elvish territory

civil unrest turns thror’s suspicions more local, prices keep rising, security tightens ever further, and the wide-reaching a.i. smaug is created to keep close track of any fluctuations in market pricing and populations, paid taxes, etc

smaug is developed further as the economy begins to capsize, providing both a source of cheaper labor en masse, as well as security advancements planetside or otherwise (military included)

an unknown development of malicious coding causes smaug to turn on erebor and it’s surrounding system, killing thousands and collapsing the local economy within the span of a day, forcing the dwarrow and few remaining human residents to flee with what little resources they have on them, and are left unable to return

elves refuse to give aid to the dwarrow though the arriving humans settle without much fuss into the colony of esgaroth, though the invitation does not extend (both for reasons of past soured relations and a general lack of ability to support the incoming population without elvish aid)

in a desperate gambit, thror pushes the refugees to khazad dum, in an unsuccessful attempt to reclaim their abandoned colony, which has since been settled by orcs, resulting in the loss of many lives, including his own as well as his son’s disappearance

under thror’s grandson thorin ii, the remaining dwarrow’s continued exodus sends them ill prepared through treacherous areas of space, until they are reach some of their smaller, more distant mining colonies in an asteroid cluster, and though many are accommodated as well as possible, it horrendously destabilizes the areas resources, sending many dwarrow further and further and resorting to cheaper and cheaper work to provide for themselves and their families

a wizard and a dwarf walk into a bar, and plans to take back erebor are begun

[snowy-equinox]

My Take on Modern Ornithomancy / Augury

Given we have very little information to go off of, it’s not surprising many modern practitioners of augury often resort to the same 2-4 characteristics: Bird species, number of birds, flight pattern, behavior.

How they interpret each of these is different depending on the person, though there is some consistency when it comes to flight patterns (we know the Romans regarded birds on the left of the augur as favorable).

All in all however, I’ve always found these aspects limiting, especially since interpreting flight patterns and the number of birds involved never appealed to me, which really left me with behavior and type of bird.

I created my own system of Ornithomancy, which expands on the different characteristics of a bird you can use to divine a message.

My Personal Ornithomancy Methods

First, my template:

Picture of the bird, and picture of the eggs

Name: The common name of the bird, generally the one I am most familiar with

Scientific name & translation

Aliases: Other common names the bird might be called by

Call notes: I’ll take a listen to the call or song, and write here what it sounds like to me for help identifying if I hear it but can’t see it

Look-alikes: A place for advice on telling this bird apart from other, similar birds; again, moreso for ID than for divination

M/F: Differences between the male and female of the species

Range Map: This can help in ID, actually! Some birds look very similar, but don’t live in the same area (chickadees are a good example). Also, you might decide to assign certain divination properties to migratory birds.

Nest: Notes on where the nest might be and what it looks like, again for ID

Mythology: This is where any mythos involving the bird goes

Cultural / Folklore: Here’s for any folklore stuff; not quite mythos, which is a full story, more “If you see this bird, it’s said you’ll experience x”

Spiritual: I look at a few pagan or spiritual blogs, and see what the general consensus is within the community; if I resonate with any of these, I’ll add them here

Behavior: Unique behaviors in the bird, especially in regards to foraging (when you’re usually most likely to see it). It helps cut down on “Wow that bird was doing something weird, must be a sign!” and also provides possible divinitory properties for the bird.

Personal: Putting it all together! Here, I look over what I’ve previously written and decide if any of it speaks to me, or seems to suggest a possible property of the bird.

Okay that was a lot! But I think walking through an entry might help.

Okay, so first some pictures to help ID it, plus what the eggs look like. Then, we have the name and scientific name, which translates directly to Cooper’s Hawk (though usually they aren’t as literal; for example, I have a warbler entry whose scientific name means moss-plucker).

So, one might already decide they want to associate the CH with speed, given how they have multiple common names associated with their swiftness.

We then get into call notes, and some ID information. I couldn’t find a lot on these birds specifically (you’ll find a lot of general hawk info, but usually species-specific mythology & spiritual meanings are sadly lacking). I do plan on adding family information later, so I can have those general hawk associations to add on to any CH sightings I might have.

Lastly, notice how the behavior plays into the personal associations. Because of their hunting strategy, I associate them with planning and forethought. Hummingbirds nesting under them makes them seem protective.

I also want to add, you might need to make a decision between science and spirituality. Cardinals are associated with love very commonly in spiritual blogs, but they actually don’t mate for life, and they often have extra-pair matings (meaning either the male or female continues to mate with other birds while raising babies with their “main” partner). That doesn’t exactly scream love to me, so I dropped that association (though some might choose to alter it to cheating, lust, or a relationship that isn’t as perfect as it seems).

You may not have reached the conclusions I did, and that’s okay! Ornithomancy is like every other divination method: It’s personal, and up to you how you want to do it. I have nothing against those who only use the same metrics the Romans did, it just never fit for me personally. I’m writing this for people like me, who have always been interested in ornithomancy, but weren’t sure where to go with it.

Plus, there’s so many other things you can do! You can also bring feather colors into it, or associate the birds with different elements, plants, etc! Hell, you can drop some of the stuff I did! I’m an ornithologist, so obviously I went more in-depth than I probably needed to, because I love birds!

Footnote: This is a recent Amino post I made, I did not steal content from someone on Amino.

[akampana]

Because of zero 10th anniversary I have a lot of people are #Remakesaberroute, and I have mixed feelings about this in one part it would meant the remake of the final farewell of saber and Gilgamesh in 4k, 144fps l, but in the other it would meant suffering trough saber x Shirou again, want do you think, would you like a remake or are satisfied with the original

Do I want a remake?

Actually, I like the idea of a remake, as long as it corrects a critical flaw the Deen adaptation had: the lack of Shirou's internal monologue.

Especially after reading the visual novel, you just realize how much of Shirou the anime, well, left out. Compared to what we get in the VN, the Deen FSN is so half-baked it's like he didn't even make it into the oven.

In the end, the anime was...well...limited by its own medium. There is so much that goes on in the VN that they just couldn't cram it all into 25 half-hour episodes. Not to say the VN is perfect, there are still some issues that I have with it and Nasu himself also said he has some issues with the way things were written, but the depth of Shirou's incredibly messed up state of being is explored there, while the anime doesn't quite get that right.

UBW did a better job of showcasing Shirou's trauma, by frequent flashbacks, Shirou's expressions when he isn't able to save Illya, how they portrayed him and Rin when inside the Blood Fort and all their classmates were unconscious etc. but I still think more can be done.

So I'm not satisfied with the original anime. (VN is better tho xD)

Ship Stuff

Also, while I don't main Shirou x Saber, I definitely realize its importance and respect it (Admittedly, that took me reading through the VNs. I went on this whole obsessive arc after Deen FSN where I was like "No that can't be it! That CAN'T BE IT!" while eating up all three routes like a starving dog.) It's got its own space on my dock, although I haven't boarded that ship in years, and only mention it in passing in most of my works. To see that relationship done right would make me happy. Shirou's relationship with Saber was the most idealistic and well, romantic in the literary sense (come on, endlessly pursuing, endlessly waiting, that shit slaps) and to see it given the justice it deserves would be great actually.

And yeah, Gilgamesh's goodbye? I'd love to see how they showcase that. Tomokazu Seki's delivery of his last words really sold the Deen version and damn I'd like to see him give it another go (FGO's similar line aside).

Other stuff

Whether or not we'd actually get a remake, though? That's the real question. It's more of a want than a need in the Fate fandom, y'know? Especially since a large part of the fanbase swears by the Deen version anyway, and anime aside Arturia and Shirou are very much beloved by the fans.

Plus, a re-adaptation would probably warrant Nasu going back to correct or improve the parts of the route he would have wanted to change. I'm not sure what his stance would be on doing that (and uh, please Nasu, get some sleep) and well, from what I see, the new LB is clearly an ode to the Fate Route. So he might not even have to go back, and instead just continue writing new things.

I would be happy to get it, but I'd be okay with not getting a remake. At this point a remake seems like the stuff of dreams. Tsukihime got its revival though, so you never know.

If anything, maybe at least a wide release of the Last Episode. I'd wanna see that. I mean we have all three routes adapted now, so haven't we unlocked this ending yet?

This?

"Yes welcome back, Shirou." The dream, finally announced its end here.

This I'd love to see.

[derekfoxwit]

Doctor Dorpden’s Critical Tips of Prestige

Note: This post was made with satirical intentions in mind. I’m only emphasizing because I’ve had a couple of comments on previous joke posts I’ve did take it seriously. With that said, here we go.

Tip 1: For starters, remember that when looking at the work, if the Mystic Knee twitches fast enough to punch a hole in a wall, this suggests that the work should be near the lowest of the low. No further development of opinion is needed.

Tip 2: For an equal degree of sophistication, give the warm comfort of nostalgia at least 5 times more chances than the new thing that MAY seem actually poggers.

Tip 3: If you have the anecdote of encountering shitty fans, then use them as a scapegoat for the show they flaunt over being shitty. Clearly, they’re always making the show the way it is.

Tip 4: If you haven’t heard much about a newer film or show you’re yet to watch, there’s an 85% chance that film or show is actually not worth your time. The Father (2020) isn’t as widespread as Joker (2019) for a reason.

Tip 5: At this point, just go for the Asian Artist Dick. I’m actually in the mood to see merit in that because I want to look edgy against cute doodles. Stop attacking Uzaki-Chan, you cowards!

Tip 6: Avoid the electronic tunes. They’ll make you smell like a bum, for there’s no structural in a music album that’s nothing but wubs.

Tip 7: If you see a Tweet that looks dumb, use it as a means of generalizing all the fans of a work as sharing that same opinion.

Tip 8: If the cartoon I’m given doesn’t provide me with mature ideas such as slicing an Arbok in half or fake boobs, then the cartoon might as well be on the same level as Teletubbies.

Tip 9: You know the music is (c)rap when it brings up drugs, regardless of lyrical context.

Tip 10:  Raw mood is the indicator of quality cartooning. If you’re quick to assume the worst in the newest HBO Max original cartoon, then you got thyself a stinker. Same thing if you were super bummed out when watching a new thing, regardless of anecdotal context.

Tip 11:  When you’re not given continuous throwbacks, ensure you’re as reductive and over-generalizing about the works shown as possible.

Tip 12:  If your hazy and imperfect as hell recollection of a children’s film, whether it’s Wall-E or Lilo & Stitch, would describe said film as “too sugary” or “key-waving schlock”, then that HAS to be the case. No meat on that bone whatsoever.

Tip 13: Simpler, more graphic style that isn’t as realistic as old-school Disney or Anime? You got yourself a lazy style with zero passion put into it.

UPA? Who’s THAT?!

Tip 14: Don’t trust anyone saying that western children’s cartoons had any form of artistic development after 2008 (with, like, TWO exceptions). If it did, why didn’t we go from stealing organs in a 2001 cartoon to showing opened stomachs in a 2021 cartoon?

Tip 15: Big booba is always important to the strong female character’s quality.

Tip 16:  Only MY ships count, for they provide me with a feeling of intelligence.

Tip 17: “PG-13″ and “R” rating just simply mean you’re not caring for expressing themes in a sophisticated manner. It’s just THAT simple until I dictate otherwise.

Tip 18:  In this age of smelly radicals, “Death of the Author” is more important than ever. Without it, this’ll imply that a classic like The Matrix was secretly toxic, due to what the Wachowskis have to say about it being an “allegory of trans people.”

Tip 19: Turn the fandoms you hate into your torture porn. Ask in Tweets to Retweet one sentence that’d “trigger” them. Go out of your way to paint all of them as blind consoomers. That’ll show them, and it’ll show how much more intelligent you are compared to those clowns.

Tip 20: Whatever the Mystic Knee dictates upon the first viewing of a work is what shall indicate the full structural extent of the film.

Tip 21: The mindset of a 2000s edgelord is one that actually understands the artistry of the medium of animation. Listen to that crazy but ingenious man.

Tip 22: Because sheer ambition makes me feel manly, the high pedestal you bestow upon a cartoon work should be based mostly on the mere mention or mere suggestion of serious topics. This means that pure comedy is smelly.

Tip 23: Is the new work tackling subjects that you’ve loved a childhood work of yours for covering? Just assume it’s super bare-bones in that case compared to the older case, for there’s nothing the older work can do to truly prove itself otherwise. Seriously, Letterboxd. Stop giving any 2010s cartoon anything above a 4/5

Tip 24: If the Mystic Knee is suggesting that the work is crummy, then consider any explanation off the top of your head for why the work in question is crummy.

Tip 25: Sexual and gender identity is inherently political, so don’t focus on them in the story. It’s no wonder why Full Metal Alchemist has caught on more than the She-Ra reboot.

Tip 26: Since I got bothered by a random butt monkey type character in a crummy cartoon, I’m now obligated to assume that having a butt monkey will only harm the writing integrity of the cartoon.

Seriously, Mr. Enter....what?!

Tip 27: We’re at a point where pure comedy for a kids’ cartoon is doing nothing but dumbing down the children. Like seriously...... I doubt Billy and Mandy would ever use farts as a punchline, unlike these newer kids comedies.

Tip 28: The difference between the innuendo in kids’ cartoons I grew up on and the ones Zootopia made is the sense of prestige they give me. Just take notes from the former instead.

Tip 29: Wanna make a work of artistic merit? Just take notes from the stuff I whore out to. It’s just THAT simple until I dictate otherwise.

Tip 30: Always remember this golden rule: If the newer work, or a work you’ve recently experienced the first time, was truly great, why isn’t it providing the exact emotions from your younger, more impressionable years?

Tip 31: If the Mystic Knee aims to break the bones of a character doing certain things (.i.e. having body count of thousands; lashing out to character; etc.), that means the character is bad and deserves no redemption.

Tip 32: If you want me to believe there’s any intrigue or depth in your antagonist, give them redemption, for I am in need of that sorta thing being spelled out. Looking at you, Syndrome. Should’ve taken notes from Tai Lung.

Tip 33: In a case where you’re going “X > Y” (.i.e. manga compared to western comics), ALWAYS CHERRY PICK! Use the recent controversies of the “Y” item while pretending that the “X” item has never had anything of the sort.

Tip 34: BEFORE you bring up those comments that shat on the original Teen Titans cartoon back when it was new, whether for making Starfire “more PC” or whatever.......the DIFFERENCE between them and me is that THEY were just bad faith fools that couldn’t see true majesty out of blind rage. I, however, am truly certain that calling any western TV cartoon from 2014-onward a work that transcends its generation suggests a destruction of the medium.

Tip 35: Based on fandom growth, it shows that any newer show isn’t being watched much by kids, but rather loser adults that act like children. Therefore, there’s more prestige in what I grew with.

Tip 36: The focus on children is bad at this point since the children of today have attention spans that flies would have.

Tip 37: A select few screenshots (or even one) of either a less elaborate attacking animation, less realistic game graphics, or a less on-model image in a cartoon indicates EVERYTHING about the work’s quality.

Tip 38: Consuming or writing media where characters go through constant suffering is little more than gaining pleasure out of it. YOU SICKOS!

Looking at you, Lily Orchard!

Tip 39: Whether it’s a sexual awakening story or just simply a romance, focus on a character being lesbian, trans, bi, etc., then it shouldn’t be in a kids’ work. It’s too spicy for them by default. Kids don’t want romance anyway.

Tip 40: The very idea of a western cartoon with no full-blown antagonist (i.e. Inside Out) is a destruction of animated artistry. Sorry, but it’s just THAT simple until I dictate otherwise.

Tip 41: Unless it’s my fluffy pillow, such as Disney’s Robin Hood, it should be obligated to assume the inserting of anthros is only there to pleasure the furries. Looking at YOU, Zootopia!

Tip 42: With how rough and rash The Beast was, it shows that he was more of an abusive lover. Therefore, I refuse to believe that Beauty and the Beast has any of the meticulous moral writing that most of Disney’s other 90s films has.

Tip 43: When you suggest one work should’ve “taken notes” from another work in order to do better, BE VAGUE! Those who agree will be shown to be geniuses.

Tip 44: Remember how morally grey Invader Zim was? That really goes to show how little the Western Animation scene has been trying since that show. Really should just be taking notes from that series (and of course anime).

Tip 45: Even if I have a radar that clearly indicates such, hiding the item I look for inside an enemy is always bad, for I refuse to believe it would be inside the enemy.

Goddamn it, Arin!

Tip 46: People struggle understanding your gender identity or pronouns? All there is to see in that is a giant cloud of egotism that reads “My problems” zapping another smaller cloud that reads “other people’s problems”. Seriously, kids are starving, so WHAT if you identity confused someone. Grow a spine!

Tip 47: Stop pretending that adaptations should colorize how a story or comic series should be defined. No way in FUCK can a cartoon or film incarnation become the definitive portrayal of my precious superhero idol.

Tip 48: Enough with your precious “limited animation” techniques, YOU WESTERN HACKS! All you’re doing is admitting to sheer laziness and lacking artistic integrity. Now if you excuse me, I’ll be watching more anime, since that gives me a sense of prestige.

Tip 49: If getting five times more detail than the 2D animated visuals have requires someone getting hurt, so be it. No pain, no gain after all.

Tip 50: Yes, I genuinely struggle to believe there’s this majestic level of layered material without having the most immediate yet still vague re-assurance practically yelling in my face. But that’s STILL the work’s fault, not mine.

Tip 51: Every Klasky-Csupo cartoon has more artistic integrity than any of them cartoons with gay lovers such as Kipo or the Netflix She-Ra show.

Tip 52:  If Sergio Pablos’ Klaus is anything to go by, we have no excuse to utilize those smelly as fuck digital animation “styles” found on Stinky Universe, Suck-Ra or Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turds.

Tip 53: Stop projecting your orientation onto works of actual talent. Seriously, how does Elton John’s I’m Still Standing expel ANY rainbow flag energy?

Tip 54: Hip hop and electronica have been the destruction of music, especially the kind that’s actually organic and not farting on the buttons of a beeping or drumming gadget.

Tip 55: The audience for cartoons has become significantly less clear over the years. We should just go back to Saturday mornings of being sold toys or shit kids actually want.

Tip 56: PSAs for kids shouldn’t be about ‘woke’ content. They should be actual problems such as doing drugs; not playing with knifes / outlets / matches; or acceptance.

Tip 57: The instant you realize a detail in a childhood work that’s better understood as an adult, you’re forced to paint that work as the most transcendent thing in the world. It’s just THAT simple until I dictate otherwise.

Tip 58: Before you lash out on ALL rich people, remember this: #Not All Rich People.

Tip 59: There’s nothing to gain out of the (c)rap scene other than becoming a spiteful, gun-wielding thug that sniffs weed for breakfast.

Tip 60: Since the Mystic Knee told me to get anal about prom episodes in several gay cartoons, this shows that writing about one’s younger experiences just makes you look pathetic.

Tip 61: Another smelly thing about Zootopia is how it was painting a police chief as stern and exclusive. #Not All Chiefs

Tip 62: Me catching a glimpse of Grave of the Fireflies as a kid and turning out fine shows that you may as well show kids more adult works without worry. No amount of psychological questions being asked will suggest otherwise.

Tip 63: There’s a reason why the Mystic Knee keeps leaning more toward the 90s and early 2000s than most decades. That knee KNOWS where there’s a sense of true refinement.

Tip 64: The BIG difference between rock and electronica? Steward Copeland actually DRUMS. All that the likes of Burial, Boards of Canada, Depeche Mode and several others did was push drum buttons.

Tip 65: One exception to the golden nostalgia is when the work in question doesn’t stuff your face with fantastical, bombastic stories. At which point, there can only be rose-colored blinds covering Nickelodeon’s Doug. Nothing of merit or personal resonance to be found.

Tip 66: Remember that the sense of nuance in the work comes down to there being everything including the kitchen sink, whether it involves multiple geographic landscapes; giving us hundreds of characters; etc. Only through the extremes will I be able to tell there is nuance.

Tip 67: Once you see a joke that has an involvement with sexual or violent content, just ignore the full picture and just reduce it to having nothing to it but “sex, violence, gimme claps.”

PKRussel has entered the chat

Tip 68: With all the SJWs messing up the art of comedy, lament the times where you could be called a comic genius, NOT a monster, for shouting out the word “STAB,” calling a gay weird, painting Middle Easterns as inherently violent, etc.

Tip 69: Guitar twang will always win out over (c)rap beats. There’s a reason your grandma is more likely to listen to Lynyrd Skynyrd than Kendrick Lamar.

Tip 70: Once the Mystic Knee notices a lack of squealing at the video game with linearity, that shows there’s more artistry in going full-blown open world.

Tip 71: Related to Tips 66 and 68, ensure your comedy gets as much information and mileage out of each individual skit as possible. EMPHASIZE if you need to. Continuously spout out your quirky phrase of “STAB” if needed.

Tip 72: Based on the onslaught of TV shows with many seasons and episodes, animated or otherwise, it shows that there’s more worth going for that than simply having a miniseries or a 26-episode anime.

Tip 73: Building off of the previous tip, you’re better off squeezing and exhausting every little detail and notable characterization rather than keeping anything simple and possibly leaving a stone unturned, especially if there’s supposed to be a story. 

Tip 74: Playing through the fan translation of Mother 3 made me realize how much some newer kids’ works just try too hard to get serious. Why even make the kids potentially think about the death of a family member?

Tip 75: The fear I had over Sid’s toys from the first Toy Story and similar anecdotal emotions are the be-all indicators of what kind of show or film is fitting for the children.

Tip 76:  Seeing this British rapper chick have a song titled “Point and Kill” just further exemplifies the fears I’ve had about rappers being some of the most harmful folks ever.

Tip 77: The problem with attempting to make a more “relatable” She-Ra is that kids aren’t looking for relatability. They want the escapism of buff fighters or something similar. This is why slice-of-life is so smelly.

Tip 78: Based on seeing the rating of “PG-13″ or “R,” I can tell that the dark humor is little more than “hur dur sex and guns.” Given the “TV-Y7 FV” rating of Invader Zim, the writers should’ve taken notes from that instead just so I can sense actual prestige.

Tip 79: The original He-Man has more visual intrigue in its animation than any of those smelly glorified doodles found in the “styles" of the 2010s and early 2020s.

Tip 80: It’s always the fault of the game that my first guess (that I refuse to divert from) on how I have to go through an obstacle won’t work.

Tip 81: Zootopia discussing prejudice ruins the majestic escapism I got from my precious childhood films from 1991-2004. Them kids might as well be watching the news. Now to watch some Hunchback after I finish these tips.

Tip 82: There is no such thing as an unreasonable expectation, and there’s especially no wrong way to address the lack of met expectations! For example, if you expect some early 2010s cartoon on the Disney Channel to be a Kids X-Files, yet you get moments such as some girl getting high on stick dipping candy, you got the right to paint the worst out of that show for not being “Kids’ X-Files.”

Tip 83: Related to my example for Tip 82, if you get the slightest impression of something being childish, you know you got yourself a children’s work that does little than wave keys and has basically nothing substantial for them. In this situation, those malfunctioning robots found in Wall-E are the guilty party.

Tip 84: Without the extensive dialogue that I’m used to getting, how can one say for certain there was any amount of characterization in the title character of Wall-E?

Tip 85: Ever noticed yourself gradually being less likely to expect an upcoming work or view a work you’re just consuming as “the next best thing”? That’s ALWAYS the fault of smelly “artists” (hacks really) and their refusal to give a shit.

Tip 86:  It’s obligatory for your lead to be explicitly heroic just so there is this immediate re-assurance that they’re a good one.

Tip 87: Without the comforting safety net of throwbacks, one cannot be for certain that there has been an actual evolution of a series or the art of animation and video games.

Tip 88: Don’t PSA kids on stuff they give zero fucks about. That means no gender identities or pronouns, race, etc.

Tip 89: Don’t listen to Mamoru Hosoda saying that anime women tend to be “depicted through a lens” of sexual desire. He’s just distracting from the superior prestige found in anime women.

Tip 90:  If you’re desperate to let others know that your talking points are reasonable, just repeat them over and over with little expansion on said talking points.

Tip 91: 7 or more seasons of art is better than 26 episodes of art.  EVERY TIME!

Tip 92: Always remember to continuously talk up the innuendo and mature subject matter of the childhood work as the most prestigious, transcendent thing of all time. With that in mind, there’s a high chance that your favorite childhood work will be better known than Perfect Blue (1997), and there’s likely a reason for that.

Tip 93: An art style that gives many characters relatively more realistic arm muscle details will always shine through more than any sort of art style done for “simplicity” (laziness, really).

Tip 94:  Seeing a few (like, even VERY FEW) people show more enthusiasm for Steven Universe over Invader Zim really shows the lower bar that has been expected out of the western animation scene compared to anime.

Tip 95: Electronic music makes less conventional time signatures cheap as hell. REAL music like rock makes them the exact opposite.

Tip 96: If your Mystic Knee suggests that the 90s cartoon being viewed doesn’t showcase a vague sense of refinement or artistic integrity, then every related assumption of yours is right. EVERY TIME!

Tip 97: Doing everything and the kitchen sink for one series or movie shows a better sense of refinement and prestige than any form of simplicity. THIS includes character design as well.

Tip 98: The advent of that Star Wars: Visions anime really shows just how stinky western cartoons have become.

Tip 99:  For those wondering, no, Europe isn’t being counted in my definition of “western animation”. Doing so is a complete disservice to prestige.

Tip 100: If even less than half of these tips aren’t being considered, you can kiss that prestige badge goodbye. After all, I SAID SO!