#and ive tried very many times just writing to write and not posting it but then i normally cave and end up posting anyways oops

[pyrosomatic-metamorphosis]

genuine question but is there any fandom where a character is well written by the majority. im thinking about fandom culture and the spread of frustration when people dont write characters well but. honestly in all the fandoms ive been in there's only like, a Select number of authors who i trust to write Well, let alone write Well AND In Character. character analysis and writing and getting inside characters' heads are all separate skills (all of which are trained by roleplaying fyi can CONFIRM playing pretend with your friends is good for you). there's been more than once where I've disagreed with an interpretation that others agreed with, and then I turned out wrong. or i turned out right. like it doesnt matter WHO is right it just matters that differences in character analysis exist, so even if you DO write well AND write in character, your in character is still going to be someone else's out of character

there's this sort of. vibe. that to play in the sandbox you Need to be able to make a castle, and if you can't make a castle then you shouldn't bother, and it completely dismisses the idea that youre in that sandbox to PLAY in the first place. there's this Weight of disappointing someone if you can't build something that they like, but that forgets that you aren't there to build them a castle. like, be KIND. if you disagree with someone then please make an effort to do so kindly. i dont give a shit about fandom discourse but there is a reason kids get removed from sandboxes if they keep throwing sand in people's eyes. but if they don't like your misshapen sand pile, then youre not obligated to change it. even if you yourself end up hating that same sand pile later- youre not building a legacy. youre playing. and sometimes the result of that play is out of character drivel. theres a reason there are so many authors and so few who i like to consistently read and thats because everyone is Fucking Around in their hobby space. hash tag brag or whatever but i can build castles. ive built several that im v proud of. ive also dug holes in the sand for fun and then tripped on them when trying to get up. I often dug a hole and then got up and fucking- whoops, its a castle now, and i didn't realize i'd made something to be proud of until after the fact. the whole time while creating shit i was Convinced it was bullshit that didn't make sense. and then other times i was Convinced it was bullshit and then i was Right and i can look back and go. huh. ew. but it doesn't matter what the end result was, because i had fun playing in the sandbox

this wasn't meant to turn into a ramble but i have Feelings about bad art and art that's badly perceived and how public perception can screw with your head and how making art youre proud of is fucking. it's so difficult!!! it's hard!! it's really fun, which is why i try to make it, but i promise you it is Okay to not tryhard creativity. even if you CAN, it's okay not to do it all the time. or ever, even. fuck around find out have fun etc

[where-does-the-heart-lie]

One Piece Fighting Game AU

this au is inpired by the song Heart Attack by Chuu

hope you enjoy the designs i created most of them in a 2 hr long manic episode of just nonstop designing.

there is more to come with this au im super excited to show you guys :)

some lore ive cooked up for it and design explainations:

preface: sorry this is so much writing and im not going to grammar check it cuz aint no body got time for that.

The world of this au is like pokemon with different gyms you can fight through and beat, there's a big league of pro fighters, and there are schools for teaching you to be a better fighter.

The school our main cast goes to is called the Doki-Doki Battle Academy and it's principle is currently Crocodile. It's previous principle was Nefertari Cobra, but maybe something nefarious happened to give crocodile the spot who knowwsssss~

Doki-Doki Battle Academy (DDBA) hosts many tournaments in their school stadium throughout the school year. The tournies act as tests for the students who are taking that field of study. There are other fields the school offers though, such as weapon crafting, medical staffing, and managing. Though, if the students in those fields with so learn fighting on the side that is also accepted.

In the Pro Fighting world, there are typically pro-league teams such as the Red Hairs and The Beasts. These teams have different levels to it such as Little Leagues (for younger fighters), Minor leagues (for adults on a regional level), and Major leagues (for profighting at a national level). You can also go solo though, much like Mihawk does.

The power system in this AU is pretty simple, different color of auras do different things, but the complexities happen when you start using the different auras in tandem. I might explain it more in depth in a different post, but i dont really know what to explain about it. mostly because i dont know everything about it, myself, yet lol

-----design talk now yippeeee-----

Luffy: i tried to make him very simple protagonist vibes, play into the genre a bit. i incorporated hearts into his design in his hat, his shirt, his arm bands, and his pants poofies. His hat was given him as a sign of love, his shirt is from his school and he loves his school, his arm bands are on his arms and he uses his arms to show his love by fighting or by hugging, and his pants arent scuffed or anything so the heart puffs on his knees protects them from getting damaged (his love protects him)

Sabo: Tried to give him a more mysterious vibe with that peacoat and hat that shadows his face. I incorporated hearts into his design in his eyepatch, his vest buttons, and his boots. His heart eyepatch covers up that nasty scar, so he's distracting himself from his past pain by focusing on his love, the buttons on his vest/hearts on his boots are more or less hidden most of the time so he tends to hide his love but when he lets his guard down (when the boot is rolled down) you can see his love plainly.

Ace: Now, i dont know if Ace will die in this au or not, but in canon, he expresses his love through his torso area, i.e. tattoo on his arm and back and also that Certain Moment, so thats where i put a big ol' heart on him. His pants are also ripped in a shape of a heart but its kinda hard to see, but its meant to symbolize how the damage he takes is his love.

Nami: All the orange in her design is in heart shapes or the shapes of tangerines, thats where her love is. I also made nami's staff a curtain rod. She uses the rod to produce wind when she summons water and then manipulates it to heat it up or cool it down. i tried to add little details like that and the bandages on her torso to show that although she's outwardly clean, she's still scrappy. Nami is in the managerial pathway at the DDBA.

Zoro: I didnt make him quite as bright or vibrant as the others, i kinda just tried to make him Just A Guy. Except for his Swords. His Swords are special, so theyre bright and saturated. I roughed him up, a bit, not too much. i made his varsity jacket be ripped open so it looks like the heart on the front was broken because zoro is very broken hearted.

Sanji: I made him look like a wannabe princely character. Very cheesy, gaudy charm. I made the hearts of his design (on his boots) look like they're sewn up. So at some point his heart was broken, but he's healing them by stitching them up with love.

Robin: The hearts in her design are hard to make out because she is hiding her love. The pink of her lacey undershirt is where the heart is and its being protected by a dark over layer. The many belts in her design, however, are meant to look like shatters in that protective layer. This is meant to represent how even though she's strongly protecting herself, that strength is still weak without any outside help. Robin uses her multiplication abilities to simply multiply the shape of her arms like how she does in canon.

Chopper: His hearts are on his viles and his hat, love was given to him when he was given that hat, and he shows his love by making his healing potions. On another note though, chopper is a Transtormationalist, which is basically the zoan fruits of this world. His model is the Reindeer and his body has naturally started morphing into that form, too. Chopper is in the medical program at the DDBA

Usopp: Usopp's hearts on his pants patches signifies the new loves he’s accepted into his once lonely life. He fights with his sling shot and his ammo is seeds he's found savaging through forests or just growing himself. the white and grey auras he commands lessen the air resistance of his projectiles and makes them go a lot faster, and once they hit their target, he makes the plant grow super quickly, like how it does in canon post-ts.

Franky: Franky's hearts are everywhere and they're bright. he doesn't hide his love and he's built love for himself to wear on his person. Franky is one of the weapon masters at the school and he's a SUUUUPER cool teacher.

Brook: the hearts in his design are his Afro and his bag. I think i read somewhere that brook has kept his Afro so that Laboon can recognize him when he sees him again and that is just so loving to me so his Afro is in the shape of a heart. His bag is also in the shape of a heart, but the bag is being weighed down by whatever he's carrying inside of it, signifying the burden of the love he carries.

Jinbei: Jinbei is a Transtormationalist, Model: Whale Shark. the heart in his design is the tattoo on his chest for his old team. He's the driver of Luffy's bus and if you do enough dialogue options with him instead of skipping the bus cut-scenes, you get the option to battle Jinbei. If you do, he takes off his jacket revealing the pro-league he used to be in and then he decimates you. it is impossible to win the battle.

Koala: the colors i used for her are peachy colors, signifying what a peach she is :)))) her goggles and the buttons on her suspenders are the hearts on her design, signifying how her love is looking out for others and how love keeps herself up.

Vivi: Her hair is a big ol heart but its upsidedow, signifying how the love she feels often makes her look at things incorrectly. Also the rips in her tights are hearts, much like ace's are. the damage she takes is how she shows her love.

Crocodile: his hook is a heart, he loves fighting. i like the idea that when a student needs a text book and and asks him for one, he gives it to them by spearing a hole through one he has in his coat and handing it to the student who has to just live with a textbook with a big-ass hole through it.

Perona: the hearts in her design are on her sleeves and on her hat. The joke about the sleeves is that she wears her heart on her sleeves. but the hat, its meant to look like more or less a cage for the heart, her love is what traps her.

Mihawk: his hearts are on his weapons, he fucking loves fighting.

Shanks: The hearts in his design are only on his torso area, the locket around his neck and the deep unbuttoned shirt makes it look like there's a heart in the negative space, and the heart patch on his jacket, the loss of his arm and the lack of something there is symbolic for the love he has given.

imma be real, i didnt put that much thought in the heart positionings for yamato buggy or law. I kinda was swept up in Hot Man, Pathetic Man, and Hot Pathetic Man.

Uta: she's based off of Cupid, so she doesn't have any hearts really in her design but her whole persona is based off of a symbol of love and how it can turn malicious.

also in general, the shines on people's hair are meant to look like a heart-rate monitor's peaks and troughs. And the shading i did just by drawing all the shading then desaturating that area

WOWEE that's a lot of designing wtf was i on when i did all this.

if you got to the end, thank you so very much for reading! i hope you enjoyed my ramblings :)

again, there is more to come with this AU so Stay Tuned, Folks!!!!!!!!!!

[whokilledsamara]

I love your Homicipher hc, they are so good! Would you be willing to do some N/ SFW for Mr. Chopped too? Like you did for some of the others? I understand if you don't want to or if it makes you uncomfortable, thank you anyway!

MR. CHOPPED N/SFW HCS

a hc list of Mr. Chopped x reader {an: SORRY GUYS IM POSTING MAINLY HCS RN,,, fics for me take a lot longer than usual so im just posting hcs to atleast get some reach.}

warnings! : smut, cunnilingus/blowjob, idk,,, cuckhold

{an: freaky shit,,,, like hes just a head so its kinda hard to fuck. did give him a section for IF he had a body.. MAINLY HIM GIVING HEAD,, i didnt rly know how to write this im sorry!! def will write more tho,,, im into him ngl}

SFW

what it would be like to be in a relationship with Mr. Chopped.

it would be relatively hard to be in a relationship with him for obvious reasons, though not impossible!

the thought of you makes him happy, and especially when you hold him.

he would have Mr. Silvair help most of the time. usually for the romantic aspects of things though.

while Mr. Silvair doesnt quite understand the relationship, he is glad to help.

being a talking head will obviously raise a few insecurities, so just reassure him that you indeed do love him! he gets his feelings hurt easily.

he absolutely loves when you play with his hair. if you put bows in it or decorate it, that will make it all the more special for him.

the first time he bit you when he was sleeping, had him crying for hours. he felt so bad that he harmed you in any way, and it took a while for him to "recover"

he loves kisses! he always shouts things like "Up, Up" or "Desire, Carry!" just so he can kiss you.

if you manage to get a hold of make up or something, he would absolutely love for you to do his makeup. {he likes to feel pretty}

he is a very sensitive boy, also a crybaby. how cuuuttteee...

if Mr. Silvair gives him a body, {ignore that one ending... we dont talk about it} then he wpuld be even more excited to see you.

the moment he gets a body would mean so many hugs and affection as a thank you for saving him.

he gets picked on a lot by the others so he usually tries his best to come to you.

NSFW

sex...?

sex is definitely a hard concept with him.

while yes, it is possible, just not in the way intended.

you could see him more as a pure object for your pleasure honestly, and he wants that.

whether you are amab or afab, he is perfect for the situation.

ive seen this referenced by another writer, but he would be like a "rose toy" or a "fleshlight" as people call it.

its a secret pleasure to watch you go at it with someone else. {ex: Mr. Silvair or someone.}

if he is gifted a body though, he definitely will pay you back for saving him in the first place.

personally he would be a soft and sensual lover with his new body, rarely going rough unless specifically asked to.

he is more of a giving top. definitely not dominant but is a top. he cares more about your pleasure than his. though, he does get all giddy when you wish to go down on his or something.

he is open to literally anything you want, he would have very few limitations on what he would do, but everything is open for discussion.

again, definitely either wants to watch you have sex with someone else, OR wants someone else to watch you and him go at it. {he would prefer Silvair.}

he definitely likes when you pull his hair or use him. will be submissive sometimes.

he is the type to cry during sex...

omfmg i love him sm

{ made by @whokilledsamara }

[3liza]

everyone arguing with material analysis/assertion about how art is a "luxury" has rarely if ever spent rent or food money on art, if they even pay rent or buy their own food, and if they did that would be considered extremely dysfunctional, and thats what i/we mean. artists are not providing a necessary service.

our plane crashes in the Andes and you are not particularly excited about my "can draw that Playboy centerfold of Marge Simpson from memory" like that is not an essential survival skill. lots of extremely skilled workers work in luxury artisan and craft jobs, it's not an insult to say even a very famous and very talented and influential artist is not producing a commodity necessary for the furtherance of human life. none of us are doing that, no matter how we stretch and strain the definitions of "essential" or even things like "morale" or "group identity". i will burn my copy of Finnegan's Wake to stay warm and thats what it comes down to.

i get foamy crazy snarling and biting about the idolization and obfuscation of what artists actually do because it is a labor issue! the public conception of artists as people possessed of a divine talent they dont consciously work to develop like any other skill, and the public idea that we are simply pleased and privileged to make art all day and "not work", something people say to my face every time i get asked "what i do", is largely responsible for the absolute dogshit reality of how subsistence and working class artists have to survive. we usually dont have health insurance unless we're so poor we qualify for medicaid AND live in a state that will enroll us. most of us are too disabled or crazy to go to a real job every day. most of us have tried, over and over, to enter the normal workforce, and have failed, and been forced to develop alternate skills that allow us to make rent in the ten hours per month we're actually functional. many of the artists i know work from bed because standing up is dicey. this has been turned into a charming eccentricity of famous artists and writers instead of people wondering why a person would need to stay in bed all day and take the enormous bother of bringing their stupid pens and paper and writing board or typewriter or whatever to their bed instead of just getting up and getting dressed and going to work. ive done this, i spilled ink in my sheets. its a huge hassle.

and artists play along with this mystique because people dont want to buy paintings from sadlords! they want to buy paintings and books and marge simpson nudes from cool guys who get a lot of chicks and wear rockstar outfits and party a lot, because of the transitive properties! of course!!! this is basic marketing!!!!! and if the artist doesnt play along they turn into Sad Story Artist where they're doing emergency commissions and posting about how sick they are all the time. this is not cool or fun or sexy. it's a sand trap and its very hard to recover from. im struggling with this right now!

famous and successful artists and writers are constantly ending up 60-90 years old with cancer and multiple sclerosis and dementia, being the subject of some sort of public, last-ditch, humiliating GoFundMe because painting paperback covers fr 60 years means you dont get a pension, you often dont even have kids who can take care of you, you dont have life insurance, you dont have health insurance. 'died penniless and alone' is one of the stereotypical artist endings for a reason, that is not fiction. this happened to more artists than i can list on two hands. look up what happened to Peter S. beagle, the guy who wrote The Last Unicorn. you write a book like that you should be set for life, right? NO. thats not how it works

i'm not saying 'all artists are disabled and working class or poor' because that isnt true, observably. nepo babies and trust fund artists exist, obviously. but they take an outsized portion of the spotlight when the public thinks of the concept of "artist". they are not actually the norm. the average artist is probably making under 40k and living in extremely precarious circumstances and has had periods of homelessness, illness, extreme debt and/or bankruptcy.

this is true even for the 'successful' artists. having one or two or ten good projects and being a household name does not save you from just not having the safety net provided by a normal career path. i was very close with a major, famous 2000s network television creator and team that you have heard of. they won awards, they changed culture entirely, they were a big deal. one of them was turned down for a half dozen projects by the same network that made millions or bilions on their franchise over several years (each pitch is completely unpaid btw, imagine carefully preparing a PowerPoint for morons for months at a time for no reimbursement and thent he morons ask you if you can put a teenage witch looking for her lost cat in the alps in it and you're like, haha, well, it's a 4 part hard sci fi miniseries set on Europa and takes place entirely inside a pressurized lander settlement, i mean Ridley Scot said he was interested already and he pitched a bottle episode about a carbon monoxide poisoning, soooooo....and the executives look at each other and they're like "it's jst not really what we're looking for right now, thanks for coming in" and you go to coffee bean and tea leaf and kill yourself and thats sort of what its like. i made that example up it didn't actually happen i'm using an illustrative example), worked on a canceled film, and just. gradually ran out of money. thats what happens. that guy ended up slowly selling off all his belongings, getting roommates in a one bedroom apartment, and then eventually having to just live on a friend's couch for years. famous guy. you probably know his name. another major member of that same team ended up in GoFundMe/commission hell for years (might still be there) because they had to take care of their two dying, dementia patient parents by themselves. these are people who go to GenCon and sign autographs for four hours at a time. THE PUBLIC IS NOT AWARE OF THIS SHIT and i'm sick of it. im sick of going to a gallery opening night ("vernissage") and drinking bad wine and having a guy with an email job that pays six figures and benefits tell me being able to push "undo" on the computer is cheating. that's a real example, that has actually happened to me. more than once.

artists currently have zero labor protections whatsoever. all of us are undercutting each other in an unregulated market and relying on welfare and private insurance and not having families or buying houses. zero security until we get so old all our illnesses and dysfunction finally ground us permanently and then we get turned into a charity case by fans (humiliating) or just fade away into ghosts and die

whats my punchline? idk i dont have one. it's possible and likely that any given artist you meet is permanently in precarity and will be until they die, even the famous ones. the culture of selling art demands that artists do not admit to this in public unless shit gets really really bad. i guess my point is you should know this, as a person who looks at or listens to or reads things that people have made for your amusement, not for your survival

[aesiva]

 ꣑ৎ 𝐊𝐄𝐄𝐏 𝐀 𝐒𝐄𝐂𝐑𝐄𝐓 (엔하이픈)

୨୧ 𝓈ynopsis — where your boyfriend accidentally exposes your relationship! ୨୧   𝓅airing — enha hyung line x idol!reader   ୨୧   𝒸ontent — idk if u would consider hee’s angsty????, mentions of fainting in hee’s , mostly just fluff, probably unrealistic… ୨୧   𝓌ordcount —  810  ୨୧   𝓃ote — ive been writing so much recently so look out for a lot of posts this week!  ୨୧ archive | daily click | maknae line

𝓁 。heeseung  (희승)

heeseung swears he’s watching an angel perform. your body moves so gracefully to the music, your smile lighting up the entire stadium. it’s mesmerizing, and for a moment, he thinks he might just be dreaming.

as he enjoys the show, he almost misses the moment you stumble while stepping back and the way your dance moves become sloppier throughout the song. he furrows his brows, biting his cheek anxiously. were you okay?

his concern turns to panic when you suddenly faint on stage, your body going limp as the lights flicker off. your members rush to your side, and jay tries to hold heeseung back, but he’s already bolting backstage, pushing past security with his heart racing. he sees you being carried out by staff, and a surge of fear grips him.

“baby!”

he calls, gently taking your hand. you’re half-conscious, holding your head, but relief washes over you when you see heeseung’s worried face hovering above you. he presses a soft kiss to your forehead and hands you a cold water bottle, urging you to drink while ignoring the staff’s attempts to pull him away.

the next day, fans are buzzing after witnessing heeseung rush backstage and the dating rumours are starting to stir. he knows that what he did was very risky, but he really couldn’t care when you’re hurt.

rest under cut !

𝓅。jongseong (제이)

jay is filming a small vlog for youtube, propping his camera up on his desk as he digs into his meal. you’re right there with him, quietly enjoying your food but out of the camera's view. knowing the video will be uploaded, you try to stay silent, confident that any moments where you might appear will be edited out.

or so you thought… when the video goes live, fans quickly notice the two plates, two spoons, and two cups on the table. and another important detail, a few strands of your freshly dyed hair briefly slip into the frame near the end of the video.

fans start comparing those strands to your new hair colour, and everything lines up perfectly. the dating rumors spread like wildfire and despite staff pulling the video down quickly, screenshots have already flooded twitter, and it’s too late to ignore.

“your fans are really something...” 

you murmur, twisting a strand of hair around your fingers as you scroll through twitter, pouting a little. jay smiles and plants a kiss on your temple.

“it’s fine. everyone should know you’re mine anyway.”

𝓈。jaeyun (재윤)

jake starts his weverse live, watching as fans pour in and flood the chat with messages. he chats with them normally, talking about whatever comes to mind. he’s done many of these lives before, and nothing has ever gone wrong, so why would today be any different?

during the stream, his phone buzzes in his pocket, and he knows it’s you. since fans can’t see who he’s texting, he decides to reply, smiling as he unlocks his phone and is met with your picture on his lock screen.

the live wraps up smoothly, and he jumps into bed, sinking into the comfort of the soft mattress and thick blankets. just as he’s about to drift off, his phone starts buzzing with messages from jungwon. grudgingly, he reaches for it, eyebrows furrowing at the video jungwon had sent.

it’s a short, zoomed-in clip from the live he just finished. as he plays it, he realizes it’s from the mirror behind him the whole time. he sees your face light up in the reflection and his smile fades as he remembers fans could see what he was doing on his phone…

they quickly trace his lock screen back to your instagram and find a photo you posted a while back that looks just like the one on his phone. jake opens twitter, groaning as his feed fills with fans already stirring up dating rumors. he opens your contact and types out a message:

“we’re official :)…”

𝓅。sunghoon (성훈)

sunghoon was infamous for accidentally spoiling about his group’s comebacks, so it wasn’t entirely shocking to you when he let something slip that was meant to be kept a secret; your relationship and the upcoming release of your latest comeback.

“and y/n’s comeback…” 

the room goes quiet… jungwon’s eyes widen, darting back and forth between sunghoon and the panicking staff.

jungwon quickly jumped out of his seat, standing up and lunging for the camera that had been resting on its stand. 

“thank you for watching, engene! we’ll be right back—” he exclaimed, his voice cracking slightly in a mix of urgency and amusement.

as soon as the camera was off, jungwon erupted into laughter, sunghoon joining in, their laughter filling up the room. he would definitely be getting a scolding from you afterwards…

© all work is written by @aesiva , do not repost, rewrite, translate or claim my work as yours.

[cy-cyborg]

I'm getting a little tierd of the idea because amputees get more representation in media, it means rep for our disability is better and we "have enough"

People are right, we do have way more rep than really any other disability, im not going to deny that, and ive joked before about how often people write amputees without even realising it. So you would think, by sheer numbers, we should have at least some good representation, but by-and-large that is not the case. Legitimatly, the closest example I can think of to point to of good amputee rep is Full Metal Alchemist Brotherhood and even that uses multiple tropes I hate (the miracle cure/quest for the miracle cure, the almost perfect prosthetic replacement/forgetting the chatacter is an amputee until it breaks or needs repairs, refusal to call prosthetics, "prosthetics" (automail), the amputee who can't do anything without a prosthetic) and they call Ed a slur for another disability (m*dget) CONSTANTLY. I love fmab deeply, it legitimatly helped me feel seen and represented as a childhood amputee in a way no other show has even come close to, and when it gets it right, it gets it really right, but it's also very far from great and should not be the best example I can think of. Especially nearly 15 years after it released...

A big part of the reason why I don't read many books anymore is because of the sheer amount of books with downright offensively bad amputee rep, some of which were touted as good by people with other disabilities and were recommended to me as good examples. others times, I wasn't even looking for books with amputee/disability rep, it just popped up. It has ruined one of my childhood hobbies for me. Ive tried to get back into reading again as an adult but it hasn't gotten better in that time i was away. I was kicked out of 3 different scifi writing groups on facebook and reddit for asking people to remember "cybernetic enhancement" users are amputees - a real group of people, and maybe debating weather or not we're less human isnt great, and for pointing out seeing those discussions every day was making me feel pretty unwelcome in that space (yes i know, "real" cyberpunk isnt trying to say that, i had to turn notifications off on my post about the topic, it doesnt change the fact that newer creators in the genre dont seem to get that bit, that ive seen cyberpunk writers in these spaces say that debating weather people who loose more parts of their body were less human was, in fact, their intent but they hadnt even considered the fact this made their chatacters amputees, it doesnt change the fact that these tropes, intentionally or not, help make those spaces hostile for disabled fans/creators, especially amputees).

But yeah, I should be thankful I get more rep than other disabilities, no matter the quality, right?

It doesn't just stop at being me being made uncomfortable, though. The sheer, overwhelming amount of amputee chatacters with "perfect prosthetics" has had a noticeable impact on how we are perceived irl. In my lifetime, the general idea people have about multi-limbed amputees in particular has gone from "literally the worst thing that can happen to a person and the worst disability to have" to "is it even a disability? The prosthetic fixes it". These are both wildly untrue and harmful ideas about my disability that were both perpetuated by media, but now that the second one is taking root, it's causing real problems. I have not been shy in talking about how I have to fight to maintain my NDIS funding every time I get something done with my prosthetics, and had to get my prosthetist to sign off, twice, that my fancy prosthetic knee that costs the same as a higher-end new car ($125,000 AUD) is not, in fact a cure and I still need help with other things. It took me nearly 2 years to get a new wheelchair because they didn't understand why I needed it if I had the prosthetics - which to be honest, is not comfortable for me to wear, let alone use all day every day. Guys this isn't just assholes on the street or on twitter saying dumb shit, it's the people in the government body who decide how much funding I get to help with my disability who beleive it. People who have very real control over my life. It's not entirely the media's fault, but when the sheer, overwhelming majority of representation for people like me confirms that belief, it's hard to ignore the possibility that these portrayals are contributing to it, you know?

Which makes it so frustrating when I come on here and see other disability writing advice blogs saying to not write amputees because they have so much representation already. We do, I can acknowledge that, but the vast, vast majority of it is shit, and no one, not even other disabled people, are listening to us about it. And what makes it even worse, is the people they're advising to not writing amputees are the creators who care enough to be doing the research. They're the ones willing to listen, to ask questions. They could be the start of the positive change. But instead they're advised to not even bother with us.

And don't get me wrong, other disabilities ARE under-represented. There are so many disabilities, including some I have myself, that I've never seen represented as anything other than the butt of a joke. There does need to be more reprentation of disabilities other than amputation and limb differences. 100%! but can you please talk about that without saying "amputees have enough"

This isn't even touching on how amputees/people with limb differences who dont/cant use prosthetics, or even folks who use prosthetics sometimes but not others, are almost never represented unless it's for pitty-porn, or how the non-fictional media's (news outlets, etc) portrayal of amputees in particular is used to justify hurting very real, very vunderable people but this rant is long enough and honestly, ive got enough thoughts to make whole other posts on those subjects. That second one in particular deserves its own (more thought-out) spotlight and shouldn't be a footnote in a frustrated rant post lol.

[nebbyy]

King Baldwin IV x reader - I’ll be waiting for you

A/N: Well, how could I not make another fic for King Baldwin when the other one I made is my most liked post yet, so I decided to write this little pieceee. Sooo I guess I should warn y'all that this one will be a little less historically accurate (not that the first one was that great of a historical piece but you get the idea). Oh and as usual, this fic came into my mind the moment I saw the painting just below (which is "the Reconciliation of the Montagues and Capulets Over the Dead Bodies of Romeo andJuliet" by sir Frederic Leighton)Now enough chatting, more King Baldwin brainrot. 

Summary: in a desperate attempt to protect his kingdom after having punished Reynald de Chatillon, the king is exhausted and the long ride has increasingly worsened his already wary condition. Once he’s escorted back to the palace, his loving wife wastes no time to reunite with her beloved husband.

Warnings: kinda angsty (no happy ending tbh), vague descriptions of Baldwin’s illness related wounds. Also, reader specifically described as female.

Word count: 3209

You sat on your throne, high and proud like the royalty you were. But under the facade of your noble confidence, you felt small. Smaller than ever, actually, as the yelling of all the men in front of you filled the air and rose up to the open sky. With a simple, reckless act, Reynald de Chatillon and Guy de Lusignan had just screwed years of efforts that King Baldwin had spent trying to maintain that delicate peace that required so many lives and time to build. All washed away from the raging river that were Reynald and Guy. 

While the two men tried to defend their senseless attack, backed by a substantial group of men, another opposing group shouted at them, berating them for the offense they had given not only to Saladin but also to Jerusalem itself.

You sigh, fighting the urge to cover your ears, and curl into your own body; you opt to just turn your head and look at your beloved husband. He looked to be in a similar state as you were: although his face was now fully covered -a means of hiding the decaying state of his leprosy-ridden body- his head was bent with weary alertness, like a hawk watching its prey from a distance. You watched his body, languidly seated on his much larger throne, the only sitting position that brought him no discomfort, though it looked almost more like he was about to lie down. 

It broke your heart to see how that disease had ravaged Baldwin's body, in recent years more and more. To see him there, on the same throne on which he once sat tall and proud, while now he barely had the strength to stay upright. And you knew he was thinking the very same thing.

You were about to open your mouth, whisper something to him, anything, in order to shake him out of his thoughts and that chaotic situation, but you were interrupted in your actions by an official, who rushed to the king's side, handing him a scroll. His bandaged hands clumsily opened the scroll, and you found salvation from the noise of the room by concentrating on watching Baldwin read carefully. You watched his eyes, blue as the sky and like the waves of the sea that brought you to the Holy Land, now covered with a pale glassy glaze. 

You frowned when you heard Baldwin freeze in place, even his sitting became more erect, as if a cube of ice had slid down his back. With his gaze still fixed on the words written in that letter, he merely raised his hand slightly, a clear sign of his will.

"SILENCE!" his guard's shout resounded through the hall, overpowering the furious shouts of the men who had been barking at each other for hours now. They all turned to look at the king; their faces, a few moments ago darkened and wrinkled with anger, were now smooth and relaxed, their eyebrows raised in astonishment at their king's order. Funny, you thought, how these men because of your husband's condition sometimes simply forget how much power he possessed over them. Before it was as if he wasn't even in the room, and they were all playing at being great leaders, now there they were, staring at him, motionless as statues, submissive as ants. You curled your nose discreetly, your face a mixture of disgust and contempt. Pathetic, you thought.

After what seemed like an eternity, Baldwin finally looked up at the crowd in front of him, finally revealing what it was that had shocked him so much. "Saladin has crossed the Jordan with 200000 men," silence fell, and you felt your body going numb. Your ears seemed muffled, you could barely perceive what was happening around you. At that moment you felt so much fear for your kingdom, and concern for Baldwin and what this impending attack would cost him.

And anger, against those two fools who out of sheer vanity had endangered the lives of all the inhabitants of Jerusalem. They had put Jerusalem itself at risk; they had put Baldwin at risk.

I was brought to attention by Baldwin, who was struggling to pull himself up from his throne, walking toward his most trusted man. "We must meet him before he reaches Kerak. I will lead the army," your husband's voice was hushed and soft, so that only the man in front of him could hear. But it did not escape your ears, the implication those words had: Baldwin wants to stop Saladin, and he wants to do it himself. But this could cost him his life. 

You couldn't stop yourself; you jumped up from your seat, eyes wide in an expression somewhere between fear and surprise. Baldwin turned to look at you, the woman who always took his breath away at the mere sight of how beautiful she was. You did not fail to have that effect on him again this time, but not because of your beauty: in your eyes he saw your terror, that this was the last time you would see him alive. They hypnotized him, and begged him in a silent prayer not to leave, to give up this plan, have an ambassador sent, anyone else. Hell, let him send Guy himself to intercept the Saracen, let him be beheaded and his murder settle the account that he himself opened. But the storm of emotion in your eyes contrasted with the gentle stream of emotion flowing from your eyes

But the storm of emotions in your eyes contrasted with the gentle stream of emotions flowing from Baldwin's eyes, barely visible because of the cover concealing his tortured face. He too, through them, was silently pleading with you: but he was asking you to trust, to let go and follow his plan, to try to forget for at least a moment all the warnings the Physicians had given him over the years.

Eventually, you relented, turning your gaze away and opting to stare at a random spot in the corner of the room. Baldwin gave a silent sigh and closed his eyes for a moment, a sign of gratitude, although you could not see it. He turned to the men of his court, and with the little strength his body afforded him, he spoke in a loud, determined voice: "Assemble the army and protect the city."

All this reminded you of the last time Baldwin fought Saladin: he had barely completed his seventeenth year, and young and still full of life, he was ready to ride against the invincible Saracen king. But on that day God had been more merciful. He had granted you, if nothing else, one last night to spend with your husband, had given you the gift of a minimum of time to ensure that you bid Baldwin a proper farewell before he met what could well have been his end. Instead this time, you barely had time to briefly remove the thick veil from his face to give him a fleeting kiss and exchange a handful of words. You fought back the tears as you looked at him, opting instead to bring your hand to his cheek, the flesh of his lip having receded and decayed to such an extent that it had receded down to his cheek, eventually turning into a long scar that protruded down to his cheekbone.

"Let me go with you, I will wait for you at the castle of Reynald de Chatillon-" "No. It is too dangerous. If things go wrong with the negotiations, I don't want you or my sisters anywhere near that man." It was not often that Baldwin interrupted you while you were speaking. He respected you too much to not allow you to finish your sentences, so the fact that he did just now spoke of how important this was to him. 

"Then promise me you’ll come back to me. Safe and sound." He snorted softly, giving a hint of smile before copping his face with his hardened hands, "You know I can’t promise it." You know that, but that blatant honesty of his, which you always loved so much, was not what you wanted at the time. No, you wanted reassurance, no matter how truthful, no matter how worthless his promises may be at the end of the day, You need that fleeting distraction that mitigates the fear that’s been eating you from the inside since Baldwin put on his armor. May you risked never seeing him again.

"Please just say it." Your voice came out much softer than you meant, almost less than a whisper, perhaps because of the knot in your throat, which threatened to break free carrying a river of tears. For a moment he remained silent, turning suddenly his face towards the voice of a nobleman who called him from the entrance of his room, but did not even dignify him with an answer. After all, his attention was completely turned to his world. To you. Before I answered you, I drew your head to his with my hands, so that I could place his forehead against yours. Finally, he spoke softly, in that loving tone that he reserved only for you: "Then I promise you that I will return to you in no more than three days, and when I return I will be victorious, and I will be riding."

After that, that moment between the two of you, which so much looked like a heartbreaking farewell, lasted just before Baldwin had to go to his horse to guide his men to the enemy.

And it wasn’t long before the harsh reality became clear to you: he had lied to you. Not maliciously, of course, you were the one who begged him to say those words after all. But the fact is that three days became four, that news of the army of Jerusalem had not come any more, that the last thing you heard of your husband was that only the ride had already tried his weakened body.

Another day passed, then another, and at the dawn of the fourth day since his absence you felt your heart sink. Had something happened to him? Had the negotiations failed? What if his illness had suddenly got the better of him? Or worse, Saladin and his men had shot him, stabbed him, or yet again captured and publicly executed,…

Your mind began to spiral into an ocean of possible reasons behind this delay, and you swore that your breathing had finally stopped once and for all when a messenger on horseback arrived at the palace, frantically dismounting from his steed to rush into the throne room and bring you the message: "The negotiations were successful, but the king is in critical condition! He is returning to Jerusalem on a canopy," you dismissed the man with a slight wave of your hand, so weak that you almost looked numbed; Baldwin's advisors began to chatter, but the background murmur of their murmurs did not seem to reach your ears. No, your attention was elsewhere; it was entirely on your husband.

You took your leave of the court, hurrying to your rooms. There, like a hawk waiting impatiently for prey to feed on, you perched on the balcony overlooking the city below you, on the walls from which not many days ago Baldwin had emerged leading the army.

It was there that you began to think again, this time with a clearer mind as you knew that at least Baldwin was alive and on his way home. On his way to you. Still, this whole situation reminded you of when you were only sixteen years old, and you stood on that balcony as you do now, waiting to see Baldwin return on his horse. And on that day, when he was visible to the naked eye, and your eyes met, you saw all the life and strength of one who had just defeated the greatest enemy of his time. At that moment, he seemed almost immortal to you: he looked like a god riding proudly, leading the thousands of men behind him towards their home.

How unfair fate is, to cut short his life so early. His physicians gave him no more than thirty years, but that time seemed to you to be shortened even more when you finally caught sight of his canopy. There he lay, sprawled and motionless like a dead body, surrounded by the soft cushions and riders on either side of his transport.

Just two years ago such a journey would not have fatigued him in the least; now he was risking his life just by riding a horse. Your eyes threatened to fill with tears thinking about how much he had loved riding a horse, and now he found himself bedridden, unable in his passions. You wasted no time running through the palace corridors, eager to reach your beloved as soon as possible.

One turn to the right, then another, then down the steps, and finally straight to the palace doors, where the finely decorated canopy led the love of your life.

You rushed to his side, gently taking his mutilated hand in yours while the other stroked his masked face. He breathed faintly, his eyes closed as he tried to regain his strength after his disease had dealt him this last bludgeon. Feeling your gentle touch, Baldwin's eyes fluttered open, his glassy eyes the color of heaven meeting yours.

"You've been reckless, my love. Putting your life at risk just to do the job of a messenger!" you scolded him, but Baldwin only smiled fondly at your words. "I promised you I would've come back. And that I did, alive too." Although his voice was so weak that it sounded more like a huff of air rather than a sentence, its tone was still laced with playfulness.

It made you unable to resist the smile that was threatening to form on your lips; you did not grace him with an answer yet, opting instead to move your hand to remove the silver mask from his face. You could see his surprised and relieved expression, as he was now finally able to breathe more freely and to look at you properly. He breathed in the sight of you, almost as if trying to take in as much of you as he could. "I can't tell if it's the travel or the sight of you that takes my breath away."

You just smiled bitterly and shook your head at his silly declarations, "It must be the ride, it has tired you so much that it's making you speak nonsense." he giggled weakly, much more tiredly this time, almost as if he was about to doze off. But he fought the tiredness nonetheless, opting to just shake his head and admire you with a lovestruck look. "Maybe I am hallucinating, I think I'm seeing heaven above me."

It was supposed to be a compliment that would've made you giggle and blush, like the ones that he showered you with daily. But instead, it made your heart clench at the bare idea of it. The idea that this would be his last moments before the energies spent for this expedition would be too much for him to handle, and God will reclaim his most virtuous man. It made your throat tighten, and your lower lip tremble.

You tried to hide your troubled state, moving your hand quickly to the curve of his neck. There, you placed a soft, butterfly-like kiss on the little places of skin that haven't been mutilated and bloodied by the leprosy. You kissed him one more time, then another, and another again..

In the end, you lost count of how many kisses you had given him, in a desperate attempt to mend your premature grief, to ground yourself in the feeling that Baldwin is there. He is alive. Yet the feeling of his skin against yours, of his chest rising up and down and his arms weakly holding your soft body, it wasn't enough to stop the tears to start flowing down your cheeks.

And that didn't go unnoticed to Baldwin, who mustered all his strength left to hold you just a little tighter. "Have my words upset you?" you sniffled, trying to recollect yourself before lifting your head to look into his eyes. "No, my dear, you could never. I just-" you stopped for a second, trying to swallow down the lump that had formed in your throat, "promise me this is the last time. Please, tell me that you will stop this nonsense. Let your trusted men handle these matters, command your man like a king not a general!" your hands had moved to his arms, a gesture to both ground yourself and to accentuate just how desperate you were in that moment, only wanting him to just listen.

"I beg of you, my love, stay here. Where you can rest. We both know that you don't have much more time left to live, so stop doing everything in your power to shorten it anymore." A sob slipped from your mouth at the last part. It truly astonished you how careless he seemed about his own condition, almost as if he forgot that any move could be the death of him.

He frowned and sighed at your words, squeezing your forearms softly before he spoke softly. This time though his tone was clearer, less weakened by the outcomes of the past days. "I already spoke to the physician about this: I have no choice, my angel. I'll be bound to my bed until a miracle will better my condition, or until death will take me."

You shut your eyes in relief, resting your forehead against his and sighing shakily, trying to recompose yourself. "I can't live in a world without you.."

"God will give us more time. I promise I won't leave you as long as I breathe on this earth. And. when my time will be over and there will be no future for us in this life, I'll be waiting for you in heaven, if I'll be granted the blessing of a place next to you there."

Not too long after, the physicians that Saladin had promised him arrived at the palace, and you were assisted as they tended to Baldwin's many wounds caused by his sickness. More than the sight of the gruesome pieces of open flesh, what appalled you was just how numb his body had become, so much so that he did not even feel their hands and tools working into his skin. It made you wonder wether or not he even felt your kisses from before.

And you make yourself that same question months later, when you place one last kiss into his forehead as he slept soundly before going to bed yourself, only to wake up to a cold body beside you. You wonder if he ever got to feel that last gesture of love before God had finally claimed him.

You only found solace in the thought that Baldwin would be resting in the realms of heaven above your head, contrary to what the Saracens believe.

A/N: Wowww this gets more fun by the day!! King Baldwin will probably always be my favorite character to write for. He’s my muse. As always ill be waiting for your feedbacks!!!

Oh and also, be prepared in the future for more fics waiting to be posted, I’ve got about ten that are just waiting for the right time to come to light, and many more will come in the future since I’m really finding it therapeutic to write.

[scribbledghost]

OUR WRITING GODDESS HAS RESPONDED!

I love the world you’ve created with the inhumane vessels… honestly anything with them in it is enough! First times with vess alone, with the vessels together… vess writing a song for his love, the vessel manor goofing around, a failed baking attempt, a birthday party for their love (do vessels have birthdays? They deserve cake too) and-

"Writing goddess" made my day and I want you to know that, anon

Those are so many good ideas!! Honestly I'd like to expand more on the First time with Ves alone and first time with the vessels together ideas in their own posts, because I'd like to explore those dynamics!

However, it would be a crime for me to not mention some of the rest, so picture it with me: the vessels having some Shenanigans while they try to make you a birthday cake.

Most of the food you eat is provided by the manor itself. It just sort of... appears? No one cooks it. No one hunts. It just shows up. Granted, the vessels don't need to eat, so any food goes to you. They *can* eat, they just don't need to.

But you'd mentioned your birthday to them, and how you'd love a cake. The vessels themselves don't have birthdays anymore, but they still remember them from when they were human (III and IV remember more than Vessel and II do, just because the latter two haven't been human in a much longer time).

They collectively make the decision to attempt to make you a cake themselves. They feel like it would mean more than simply having the house manifest one for you.

But... not a one of them know how to cook or bake. Like, at all. Whatsoever.

You're in the library for the day under Vessel's instruction while they make an attempt to utilize the cookbook that had appeared on II's bedside table that morning.

They're all crowded around IV while he reads through the book. It's all Greek to them.

Actually, not even Greek. At least Vessel understands Greek. He's been around long enough to understand most languages. But he's never encountered these words in this order before.

But after some questions (and some wayward vines pushing bags of sugar and flour towards them), they at least manage to get going.

III is suddenly reminded that he had a sweet tooth as a human, and after about five seconds II is wrenching the bag of sugar away from him before III can just pour it into his mouth.

IV is plugging along fairly well, mixing the wet and dry ingredients separately. While attending to the first bowl, however, both he and Vessel neglect to notice II peeking into the bowl with the flour and baking powder.

Until they hear an unholy sneeze, and look over to see this:

So. That bowl's out. No matter, a new one is quickly made by III while IV is busy yelling at II for having the audacity to openly sneeze over food. Vessel is still laughing.

From there though, things are... surprisingly smooth. None of the vessels have ever operated the oven, so the manor steps in to provide aid.

Vessel insists on decorating it. Does he do a great job? .... not particularly. But he tried dammit, and that counts for something.

You'll have four very nervous demi-humans looking at you when you take the first bite. As soon as you tell them it's good, they all sigh in relief.

Be sure to get your fill while you can though. III will annihilate that cake as soon as it's left unattended.

[antshifts]

☆ Welcome to my diary ☆

☆ About me ☆

HIII!! Im Anthony or ant! ⭐︎ 15 ⭐︎ he/they ⭐︎

Im African american or soulaan ❤️🔱🖤

Dispite this blog being a spur of the moment thing im actually really excited to post on here!

Im a veteran shifter I've been shifting and on shiftok since good ole 2020 with all the misinformation (*´∀｀*)

I have wayyy too many interests but the one I've been hyperfixated on the most and for years is jjk!!!

Im like seriously obsessed with it… its become a problem (*´-`)

— Some of my other interests are ☆

Saiki K︎

Mouthwashing ⭐︎

MUSIC (any kind all kinds!!) ⭐︎

Anime and manga ⭐︎

Devilman cry baby ⭐︎

Arcane ⭐︎

Vocaloid (Miku is my fave!!) ⭐︎

Creepypasta ⭐︎

Detroit Become Human⭐︎

Coryxkenshin ⭐︎

Aot (attack on titan) ⭐︎

Sally face ⭐︎

And more ⭐︎

☆ Extra about me ☆

I talk/write a wholeeee lot, like ion know how to shut up fr fr 😞 ⭐︎

Im open to dms and talking to just about anyone and everyone so don't feel shy im a nice person (๑>◡<๑) ⭐︎

I do really wanna make more friends who are into shifting and also people who have actually shifted before!! Because even tho im a vet shifter I have yet to shift 🙁 mostly bc I always take ages to finish a script, IF I finish a script. But thankfully I actually finished my jjk script and im so excited to go but I haven't been having much luck and I've been pretty down about it and losing motivation so to make things fun again and have something for me to look forward to Im gonna do different methods every night until one works and report back here 😝!!! ⭐︎

Some fun facts about me are.. ⭐︎

my favorite color is purple! Dispite that fact that both of my blogs are pink themed… ⭐︎

Im nobinary!! ⭐︎

I have a severe ao3 addiction. If ao3 goes down you can expect me to be on this app tweaking out 😞 ⭐︎

Im suspected to be autistic (most likely) or some kinda neurodivergent (ik there's deff sum going on up there I just don't have confirmation yet)⭐︎

Im a very passionate person I feel strongly about a lot of things⭐︎

I LOVEEEE Miku I have a whole wall dedicated to her⭐︎

I have a intense and terrible obsession with jjk 🙁 its all I think about it has consumed my mind and life 😭 if you can't tell now then don't worry you will 🙁 you’ll be able to tell… ⭐︎

Im silly 😝⭐︎

Im also sigma and alpha and a rizzler 😼⭐︎

I know a concerning amount about the omegaverse⭐︎

⭐︎ My blog stuff ⭐︎

What I’ll post:

Also this is a Yuji Itadori themed blog so you’ll see him a lot in my blog along with other characters but mostly him (⌒▽⌒) he's so bbg!!!!

Lists of methods I've tried and ranking them ⭐︎

Shifting memes ⭐︎

My shenanigans and rants ⭐︎

Talking posts ⭐︎

Shifting focused content ⭐︎

Advice and how to not fall for misinformation (because trust me IVE been there… I still get war flashbacks to 2020 shiftok.) ⭐︎

My silliness ⭐︎

Things to put in your script ⭐︎

☆ My Masterlist ☆

Here! Is my big shifting diary masterlist where I will post my shifting attempts and successes and ratings for every method I try!! (*^▽^*)

☆ DNI ☆

This dni is non-negotiable if I find you on my blog you will be blocked.

RACISTS OF ANY AND EVERY KIND

Radqueers

Proshippers

Homophobes and anything homophobe adjacent like fatphobes etc

Anti-shifters (I don't care about your opinion pls don't try)

Just overall shitty people

Honestly I don't have many things for my DNI just don't be mean or a weirdo 😝

I don't mind or care if people 18+ interact with my blog just be aware that I'm a minor so don't be weird or anything!!

☆ shifting stuff ☆

My Desired Realities:

Jujutsu kaisen (my main dr and only active one)

Fame dr (gotta redo/inactive)

Saiki K (unfinished)

Sooo I deff have a lot of work to do with my other dr’s but im not too worried about that for now! Im just gonna focus on one thing at a time, that being shifting to jjk first (*≧∀≦*)

Like I've said before I am a shifting veteran and I've been here since 2020 and somehow I still haven't shifted BUT I do know a lot about misinformation and how to tell if something is lies so if anyone has any questions about that I will be more than happy to answer ♡

Most of my shifting journey for the past 5 years was just a cycle of scripting, abandoning the script to start a new one, so on and so forth with the occasional finishing of a script only to try to shift for like a week before I give up then start a new script…

But that was like a year or 2 ago, I took a very long (much needed) break from the shifting community and shifting in general

What caused me to come back you may ask?

School 🙁

I treated winter break like graduation and I didn't wanna go back so I got the bright idea to make a new script for jjk this time and shift there!

However I in fact did not shift there yet but that's the goal!

Dispite my flakey past with shifting Im determined to be better and more determined this time! I will shift. Its my goal, my mission 😼.

And your gonna come along with me for this journey! Hopefully it won't be a long journey because i’d like to shift sooner rather than later. But honestly as long as I shift im fine with however long it takes! So with that out of the way..

I hope you enjoy my blog!!

☆

[swordsmans]

yayayay thank you for the tag, @acewithapaintbrush !! this is so fun

words posted:

53,241 - not bad! a far cry from 2023's 200k+, but it was a rough year so im pleased i managed that much.

additional words written:

13,532 - zine pieces and a WIP, but this is only counting prose. if u know anything about my writing process... i fear this number is much larger but im not dredging that up

fandoms:

one piece, babbeeyyy

highest kudos + highest hit one shot:

highest kudos: the heart is just an organ, the "crew encounters a DF that temporarily suppresses zoan powers" fic

highest hits: step 2: survive anyway, the second half of the "zoro finds out about luffy's poison immunity and subsequent 10 year life loss" fic

new things i tried:

not new, per se, but i definitely went a bit "mask off" with my roots re: horror this year. step 2 and everything rots in the sun were my darkest fics in years i think.

fic i spent the most time on:

by purely 2024 standards, i think i worked on both step 2 and everything rots in the sun for about the same amount of time (~5 months each). if we're going by fic tho then definitely step 2. that took 8 months to write.

fic i spent the least time on:

the heart is just an organ lol. while i was technically kicking the idea around for 3-ish months, actual prose-to-posting time was 4 days.

favorite thing i wrote:

ohh tough question, because everything i wrote this year is a "favorite" for different reasons. i think i'll always be extremely proud of step 2 though (and both step 1/step 2 in general tbh), but everything rots was a feat unto itself.

its very interesting to look back on the two fics i bookended the year with, bc theyre both extremely dark but they have sort of... opposite theses. step 2 is about being unable to focus on the joy of something thats alive because you know it will die, and everything rots is about doing everything you can to cling to the possibility of joy even though you know in the end, itll mean death.

favorite things i read:

how dare you make me choose!! i read so many wonderful fics by so many incredible writers this year, but theundiagnosable's impiety duology is one of those stories i keep thinking about. its a very tangentially/loosely-canon luzo au thatll just flay you alive.

writing goals for 2025:

i actually dont have any real plans to write much in 2025 beyond maybe 2-3 small fics, so we'll see what the future holds. it might be a quiet year tho. (watch--ill say this and then post another 90k beast in july like i did in 2023 or smth. surprise us both)

new works:

ive gooottt some smut ive been batting around. finally. we'll see where that goes :3c

tagging:

i tag...!!! @the-furthest-city-light, @ghostlandtoo, @toxinspired, and @thychesters~!

[shelbgrey]

hiii ! i’ve just recently gotten back on tumblr after rewatching bones again and ive been dying for some lance sweet posts ( so thankful you write for him you’re amazing <3 ) anyways i was wondering if you could write something up for sweets with maybe this prompt ? 0.4) “Why can’t I breathe whenever I think about you?” especially if the reader could be plus sized if not, i appreciate you reading this have a great day,night <3

Let me take your pain away(Lance Sweets)

Paring: Lance Sweets x Plus Sized!Reader

Summary: Lance comes home all scraped up and his girlfriend patches him up, trying to take his pain away.

Prompt: 0.4) “Why can’t I breathe whenever I think about you?”

MasterList

“hey, this is Lance Sweets, leave a message”

I started to get worried when Lance wasn't answering his phone. I knew he was out with Seeley, dealing with a suspect, but that was a few hours ago. Even then Lance was good about answering his phone even if it was a quick text. Every time I got Lance's voice mail the more I worried and the harder it became to concentrate on the file I was studying for the case.

An hour later there was a knock at the door, I immediately sprang from the couch and ran towards the door. It's funny, I could just recognize it was Lance just by his gentle and yet firm knock.

I sighed with relief when I saw it was Lance, but he looked rough. He had a few bruises and cuts on his face, his side looked like it was nicked from the way he was holding it, and his shirt was covered in blood. “Oh Baby, what happened?” I asked softly as I pulled him into our home gently then closed and locked the door.

It hurt to see him like this, his bright smile was gone and he winced in pain after every move he made. I followed him close behind, afraid he would lose his balance. He let out a groan and leaned against the door frame of our bedroom, his breathing quickening. He sighed and looked towards the floor. He was completely exhausted and you could just see how much of a beating he had taken. “I'm okay…I'm okay…”

I gave him a soft expression and gently helped him sit down at the foot of my bed. I took the holster that held his gun and put it on the nightstand so he could sit comfortably. “Just let me take care of you… You don't look fine” I said softly. Lance closed his eyes and tilted his head back, taking a few deep breaths as I gently moved a few strands of hair off his forehead. I saw a cut on his forehead.

I knew that he would be fine and did his very best to put up a brave face but, yet the cuts and bruises on his face spoke for themselves. They revealed the pain he was in and everything that he had been through to night. All the fighting, stress, pain, you could see it in his eyes.

“It's okay…” I said softly and gently ran my fingers through his hair. “I'll get you cleaned up so you can rest…”

Lance let out a shallow breath and nodded his head. He would never admit it, but the fight had taken a lot out of him and he needed a break. He had always tried to put up a tough front for people, always telling people he was fine, even to me, yet I saw right through him every single time. We had an incredible bond, one that could never be explained unless you experienced it yourself. I kissed his forehead gently then left to get the first-aid kit and some clean clothes for him.

Lance sighed, his eyelids falling slightly, yet he fought it as much as he could, waiting to be taken care of like I did so many times before. I left him in our room and rummed around for first-aid supplies. That was one of our favorite things - our abilities to take care of each other with no judgment. It showed how much we loved each other. He was still setting at the foot of our bed when I came back with the first-aid kit, a towel, and the clothes, I set all the items down on the bed next to him

I reached for the buttons of his stained t-shirt and started to up softly, so I could get the ruined shirt off and clean his injuries. After I unbuttoned his shirt I slowly pushed it off his shoulders then threw the ruined shirt on the floor. I cringed slightly when I saw the nasty cut along his side and various bruises on his body. When you work at the jeffersonian you become desensitized to gore, but seeing him all bruised up made my heart pound.

my eyes softened and worry flooded my mind when he winced in pain after a single touch. I saw the nasty cut on his side, it looked like he was cut with a blade or something. “honey... If this was any deeper we would be taking a hospital trip right now” I said softly with a hint of worry as I gently cleaned the cut with warm, wet washcloth.

Lance chuckled softly, the pain becoming slightly more tolerable after being cleaned by the warm washcloth. The cut was actually pretty bad, yet Lance did his best to hide it the entire time. I worried to much. I'm always afraid he was gonna die. After I cleaned up the blood, I pulled out the bottle of peroxide. I gently brushed the cut with a cotton ball soaked in peroxide, I was slow and careful with my movements. Lance bit his bottom lip, wincing as he gripped my hips.

“I know Honey... I'm almost done” I said softly and started to apply clean bandages on the cut after I got done cleaning and treating it.

Lance's eyes slowly closed as I began to apply the bandages to the wound. He breathed a sigh of relief once it was all done. His body relaxed a bit, letting himself take some time to unwind after being so stressed from the case. He opened his eyes and looked at the floor, seeing just how bad his shirt actually was.

after I got done with the worst injury, I got a fresh cotton ball soaked in peroxide so I could start treating the cuts on his face. I moved and stood between his legs so could reach him better. I placed my hand on his jaw, gently tilting his head back so I could clean the cut on his forehead. The cuts on his face all stung a bit, he ran his hands up and down my curves slowly, trying to distract himself from the pain. At least they weren't near as bad as the one on his side. Some were just small cuts that would heal up quite nicely while others were a bit more severe, the largest one being on his forehead. He kept his eyes completely closed because it made the process easier on him.

“God, Lance” I whispered sympathetically as I put the last of the bandages on his face. “What happened out there?” I whispered.

Lance winced, holding his side as he shifted on the bed. “M-me and Booth went to bring the guy in”

“the guy me and Temperance interrogated today?” I asked softly as I wrapped up his busted knuckles. I noticed the broken skin and the bruises, the guy definitely put up a fight.

“yeah… N-next thing we know he shot up the place and ran for it. Me and Booth got separated… I went after him on my own”

I looked down at his busted body, feeling terrible about his outcome,he noticed and signed. “I'm sorry I worried you tonight… He somehow found out about our connections and threatened your life… I snapped”

I placed my hand under his chin and gently lifted his head up so our eyes could meet. The brow eye that usually held so much love and happiness now looked tired and broken. “you have nothing to be sorry about, but there's no reason to risk your life over me,” I said softly.

“Then Why can’t I breathe whenever I think about you? Why do I wake up every morning thankful you're lying there next to me, why are you spending your night patching me up instead of getting a good night's sleep? I know why, because you're worth fighting for and worth protecting” he spoke softly. “i'd go through this pain all over again if it meant keeping you safe”

I gently kissed his forehead. “I love you… Don't come home to me like this again” I said softly.

He smiled softly. “I love you too”

“I'll help you get changed then you need to lay down and rest” I said softly, running my fingers through his messy hair.

I picked up his bloody shirt and towel, throwing it in the hamper. I quickly grabbed a fresh pair of boxers and a flannel to wear to bed. I came back to him and helped him pull the flannel over his shoulders, but didn't button it up in fear of irritating any of his injuries. He pulled his boxers, I smiled softly and ran my fingers through his messy hair, fixing it slightly “There... All patched up” I whispered.

Lance smiled softly then he slowly crawled into bed, laying down into the comforter. He closed his eyes once again and breathed in a deep breath, letting out a long sigh as he did so. His body was so tired and worn out after the lengthy fight. It felt so good to just relax and know he was safe.

I smiled softly and carefully climbed into bed, getting comfortable on my side of the bed, usually we'd cuddle in bed but since he was so sore I was just gonna sleep on my side of the bed.

“Thank you for taking care of me… I love you” Lance said softly, drifting off to sleep.

“I love you too”

[angelst4re]

hey lovely could you do an jace nsfw alphabet? i dont think ive seen one for him. i love your writing your the best! ❤️

of course!!! i remember seeing one a while ago, i'm not sure where it's gone!! but of course i had to do it anyway cos i love these!! :)

Jace (Wayland? Herondale? Morgenstern? Lightwood??) NSFW Alphabet!

warnings: NSFW!! it's in the name!!

notes: sorry for not posting much lately, i've been too busy learning how to edit because I'VE MADE A JAMIE TIKTOK!!! i haven't posted anything yet but if you want to follow me this is my account :) anyways...

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

He usually doesn’t care for it, but you’re the exception. He would make sure he takes care of you in every way he can, especially if he has been rough with you. He’d clean you up before he brings you a glass of water and the two of you would either just cuddle on his bed or he would run a bath for you. In the beginning of your relationship, he wasn’t sure what aftercare was really about, or how it worked, but he knew he wanted to make sure you were okay after sex, and he knew he didn’t want you to leave as soon as you had both finished. 

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His favourite body part of his own is definitely his hands. I mean come on, they’re beautiful. Although they’d carry many scars from fights and other marks, he loved the way they looked on your body, especially as his hands are rather big. Of course he’d love to see his hands caressing your hips, pulling you closer to him, and around your neck, but he also just loved the way it looked when you would hold hands, and when he could compare your hand sizes and he would make fun of how small yours looked in comparison to his. 

His favourite body part of yours… he would say your face and argue about how that it is technically a part of your body. He loves placing kisses on your cheeks, your forehead, your nose and especially your lips. He loves the colour of your eyes and how they seem to darken when he knows you’re needy. But if he had to choose an actual body part he would say your neck as he loves to leave bruises there with his mouth and he very much enjoys the sounds you make when he finds that one particular spot. 

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He loves to cum inside you, you could go as far as saying he perhaps has a breeding kink? But he’s never really thought that far ahead. He just loves the thought of you being full up with him in as many ways as possible, knowing that even when he’s not fucking you, part of him is still inside you. This also applies to when you give him blowjobs, most of the time he makes sure you’ve swallowed every last drop, unless he’s feeling a bit more adventurous, which then he’d cum on your face. 

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

I don’t know if it’s really a dirty secret but he liked you for a while before the two of you began dating, and he once accidentally walked into you in the shower. It took everything in him to hold back and walk away, he wanted to wait for you to get out, tell you how he felt and fuck you so hard youd forget your name. But he held back another week, but he didn’t leave your room without a pair of your underwear. After that night, he spent the rest of the week hooking up with random girls and imagining they were you as he fucked them, but no matter how hard he tried, he knew they just weren’t you.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

OH HE IS EXPERIENCED AND YOU KNOW IT!!! He knows exactly what to do in the bedroom, and he knows exactly what you like and what brings you to the edge quicker than you could say his name. Whenever you want to try something new in the bedroom, it’s likely that he’s already familiar with it. 

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

He doesn’t like to admit it as it makes him seem “too vanilla” but he loves missionary with you. He loves watching your face as he fucks you and your eyes roll back. He loves being able to run his hands over your body and lift your hips up to his. 

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

It can go both ways, for example if he’s had a bad day he’d rather be more serious in the moment, but if you two had just come home from a party and you were both drunk, there would be a lot more giggling involved. 

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He likes to keep it clean and tidy down there, shaving every couple of weeks as he prefers how it looks. Although, if he weren't to shave the hair he grows is quite light and so isn’t very noticeable when it begins to grow out. 

And when it comes to you, he believes it’s your body and your choice. Hair is natural, and nothing to be ashamed of! 

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Oh Jace is such a romantic when it comes to you. He’ll hold you close as he fucks you and whisper things in your ear, telling you how beautiful you are and how he’s never loved someone as much as he loves you. But this can also change when you want him to be rough, he can be very dominant, shoving your face into the pillows, calling you degrading names that makes you even wetter than he imagined possible. But deep down, he’s a romantic. 

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

He’d masturbate almost every night before you and him got together. Now, he doesn’t really have a need to. But sometimes when you’re away or when he’s in the shower and thinking about you, he’ll get off to the thought of you. Sometimes when he’s finished he’d feel guilty for doing this, but in the moment he’s too horny to even think straight. 

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Should I make a list? I’ll make a list. 

Edging

Orgasm control

Hair pulling

Choking and breath play

Handcuffs 

Spanking 

Breeding 

Daddy kink 

Cockwarming 

Thigh riding 

Spitting

Degrading

I could go on and on about this but I’ll stop here. 

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

His bedroom, your bedroom and the bathroom. He likes to know you’re comfortable and there’s not a risk of being caught. He doesn’t like the thought of anyone seeing you the way he sees you, he doesn't want anyone hearing the noises you make as they’re all for him! He even made you rush back to his room from the greenhouse when you made him hard from sitting on his lap. 

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

The way you look at him when you’re needy. He would have to hold back from taking you over the kitchen table if you were to give him that look during breakfast. But also when you would surprise him with new lingerie. When you walk from your room to his in your robe with nothing but a lingerie set on underneath… prepare to not be able to walk in the morning. 

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

The thought of having a threesome isn’t something he likes. As I’ve mentioned, whilst dating Jace you are his and only his. He doesn’t like the thought of another man touching your body, and equally you don’t like the thought of Jace fucking anyone else. So that’s something that’s off the table, at least for the moment. 

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

HE LOVES TO GIVE ORAL. Jace is the king of giving head. He knows exactly what to do and just how you like it. He could spend the rest of his life between your thighs, quite happily. Even if neither of you have the time or the energy for sex, he will still go down on you like a starving man. He loves to give <3

He also loves receiving, as any guy would. He loves when you drop to your knees in front of him and take him down your throat. However, he will always prefer to give. What a gentleman. 

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

It all depends on the mood and the moment. If you had a heated argument and you ended up pushed against the wall with his tongue down your throat then you’d expect it to be rough and fast. But if you’d just come home from a date then he’d carry you to the bed, take his time with you and show you how much you really mean to him. 

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

If either of you need to do it, then you need to do it! However, it doesn’t happen very often as he’d rather take his time. 

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

If you’re comfortable with it! He doesn’t want to put you in a situation where you don’t feel safe or comfortable

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Oh he could last all night and all day if you asked him to. He’s trained all his life so he has stamina, and he definitely shows it off in the bedroom. You’d be a drooling wreck beneath him before he’s even begun to sweat. 

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He doesn’t own any, but he surprised you with a vibrator for your birthday one year and he loves to use it on you, or to watch you use it on yourself. He would happily experiment with more if you were to ask him. 

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He loves to tease. He’d place his hand on your thigh at the most inconvenient times and begin to move it upwards. You’d swat him away but it would only encourage him to tease you more. 

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

He’s not very loud, but he’ll definitely moan your name and let out low groans as his hips roll against yours. He tries to keep quiet so the others don't hear him but if you're both home alone then... ;)

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Jace lost his virginity in the greenhouse with a girl he only dated for a few days. He had been very cocky and told her he’d fucked loads of girls before and then when it finally came to the act he wasn’t too sure what to do and when she left he was feeling quite embarrassed, but thankfully she ended up moving away so he never had to see her again. He didn’t have sex for 6 months after that, and he even read a few books on how to improve in the bedroom, as he never wanted to feel that same shame again (and he never did!)

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

He’s definitely hiding at least 7 inches down there, his cock would be the biggest you’ve taken and it’s very satisfying ;)

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

He’s horny all the damn time. You could literally just breathe and he’d be turned on. He’s always had access to sex whenever he wanted it, being as stunningly attractive as he is, and girls would throw themselves at him so he’s never really had to suppress the feelings before and control himself until he met you. You can even tell when he has to hold himself back from crashing his lips into yours and taking you on the bathroom sink. 

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

He could fall asleep quite quickly after he finishes, but he makes sure you’re looked after first. When he’s certain that you’re happy and comfortable, he can fall asleep with you in his arms <3

[radioroxx]

hi pluto i’m here to ask if u have any isat headcanons. about anybody! hope u have a good sunday :))

HAPPY SUNDAY VIA can i call you via. hello

ive mentioned my tattoo hcs before but im gonna expand on them as best i can rn because i think about it occasionally (i am making a lot of this up. right now! for you!)

ok so odile has a lower back tattoo she got in her 20s and i feel very strongly about this one 1. because i think its funny 2. because it makes her 10x cooler. the other day in my moots disc we talked about the idea of odile having a past polycule that she broke off from and so ive adopted that idea and decided the tattoo is a matching one. she does not regret it at all and is still (somewhat) in touch with her ex’s. siffrin was the first person she told about this, drunkenly btw, and for months afterwards he couldnt remember if it was Actually Real or just something his brain made up (and they were too scared to ask lol)

siffrin has star tattoos on his back and shoulders! i was considering giving him sleeves but i changed my mind,, he got them while he was still travelling on his own. possibly theres a region that is more well known for tattooing (havent decided what this would be though)! he was interested from a ‘learning about new culture’ perspective, also just because Why Not. he chose to get stars because it felt right. he somewhat regrets it. (maybe, post canon and later on their journey, he would try out something else. different designs. things inspired by his family! or things he wants to remember)

isabeau has no tattoos. not from not wanting them, but from just never really having the interest. UNTIL travelling with the party. until staying up late with sif in their shared tent and finding out that, on his travels, he learned how to (very basically) give people tattoos. and begs him for one. its like 2am and neither of them are thinking clearly so they agree. they ‘borrow’ odiles ink pot she uses for writing, a sewing needle that isa happens to have on hand, aaaand it. goes very poorly. as youd imagine. he is lucky to have the long sleeves to cover it up. whatever design theyd been going for was absolutely not achieved. but! he cherishes the memories regardless. (incredibly, they would try this twice. the second time would be after bonnie joined the crew, who would catch them awake, beg siffrin for a tattoo of their own, be told ‘no’, but would still be allowed to watch as long as they PROMISE not to tattle to madame and mira in the morning. bonnie absolutely tattles).

mira! does not seem like a tattoo person to me. i think she would be intimidated by the idea- partially in relation to the change belief, partially because she wouldnt know what to get. i like to think tattoos are probably pretty controversial to the religion… some people think they are a very powerful form of change! something you cant take back. others disagree for the same reason, that its permanent. so pre canon no tattoos for her. but!! but! as i mentioned before with siffrin getting tattoos for his family, i think mira might consider something as well (confidence boosted by the fact that the others will be matching). other than that though, it just doesnt appeal to her much.

bonnie has no tattoos also aaand it will stay that way for. a little bit. this is something that upsets them greatly because i also like to believe that nille has PLENTY of tattoos! possibly some she even got when she was much much younger! irresponsibly, of course, and many of them are regrettable. so she steers bonnie away from making that same mistake too young (tries to encourage them to wait until they are 18 at least). maybe bambouche as a whole is a very tattoo-supportive town, which is where bonnie got their interest. this does not stop them from making little paintings up their arms and having the others help out as well, to make up for it, in a non-permanent way.

i havent actually designed what any of their tattoos would look like… thats gotta be something i sit down to think about,,, one day maybe ehe

[this-shit-is-zucchini-baby]

Gun companies and their reputations

hello murder drones fans! here's a random idea i wanted to post. as we know, people love making fankids. especially with Uzi, and with uzi, people are going to want to name their fankids after guns. ive already seen it, and I understand it. its sick as hell!

however, these are gun companies were talking about, and the gun industry does actually have loads and loads of drama. some of these companies also do not have your best interests in mind. I personally, would not name my son after a gun company with a systemic sexual harassment lawsuit against it, or from a company that fucks over its customers.

Im gonna be compiling a list of gun companies with names that could be used as names for a person, and giving some background on the company and their standing in the market. I'll try to make it alphabetical, and if you see any other company names you want me to add and give insight on, I'll add it with an edit.

Lemme know if i get anything wrong as well! I'm writing most of this down from memory over my experiences with these guns and companies

Armalite - I suppose you could use this as a name?? They used to be owned by Fairchild Corp, and made the first versions of the Ar-15 for the US military, before selling the design to Colt for mass production. The AR-15 was originally designed as full auto btw. the M16 is an Ar15, not every Ar15 is an M16. They make guns still, but they're a far cry from the original Armalite. I haven't heard of anything bad about them particularly.

Beretta - The oldest still standing gun company on the planet, they are almost 500 years old now. They've made derivatives of the Walther P38 for about a century now, also known as the Beretta 92 or M9, and they make sporting and combat shotguns, as well as some newer stuff like the APX striker fired pistols and CX4 carbines. When NFTs were all the rage, they tried to cash in on it with some virtual photos of guns that were worth fake money. It didn't go well, and Beretta support isn't known for responding to customer support emails. Their 92 series of pistols are dead reliable though, just chunky.

Brugger & Thomet - They make good guns, but they're all so ridiculously expensive that it's not worth it at all. They make a lot of popular suppressors, and as a company is reported to pay very well.

Colt - Recently bought out by CZ, Colt is one of oldest American gun companies. They were known for producing the 1911 designed by John Browning, and the AR-15 by Eugene Stoner and Jim Sullivan. Colt did not design the Ar-15, that was Stoner and Sullivan at Armalite when the Airforce requested a new rifle because the M14 was dogshit. Colt made AR-15s for a long time before FN Herstal made a better version (The M16A4, and later the M4) that met the military's needs. Colt has very little drama that's notable, but in the 80s-90s they made the All American 2000, which was called a bad gun in retrospect by every youtuber on the planet. The gun worked perfectly fine, it was reliable, it just has a very long and heavy trigger.

CZ - Mentioned because of its clones and their names. Originally owned by the Czechoslovakian government, before being split off into a private company, they make some modern looking pistols, the CZ-75 and modern sporting derivatives, as well as assault rifles, sporting shotguns, and some bolt action rifles. There's nothing much of note, other than that CZ fans will absolutely have to let you know they're a CZ fan. They're guns are pretty fine, and ive never heard of any reliability issues. the CZ-75 is also a gun thats been used as a base for other companies guns such as IWI's Jericho 941 and Baby Desert Eagle, Tanfoglio's clones, SAR's clones, B&T's Mark 2, the Armalite AR-24, the Springfield P9, the Sphinx SDP- Actually, here's a chart of how many CZ-75 clones there are, its MASSIVE. People love copying this gun. Dont buy a clone, just get a CZ-75.

Https://weaponsman.com/so-how-many-cz-clones-are-there/

Franchi - A long time ago they made the LF-57 SMG, and they made the SPAS-12 shotgun. They were bought by Beretta and Beretta discontinued the SPAS-12 so that Beretta could sell their combat shotguns to police and military instead. Franch makes hunting and sporting shotguns now. The Spas-12 was never a good shotgun because it was ridiculously heavy and chunky, and loading it was a pain in the ass compared to other shotguns that dont need locked loading gates.

Glock - They make exactly one gun in over 31 different configurations. These things are used by everyone and the only reason one is going to malfunction is if you stick aftermarket parts in it. This is the safest gun you could possibly buy, but they fit some people's hands badly. This is like the default price for a gun at 550 USD

Heckler and Koch (HK) - They make the MP5, UMP, G36, HK416, USP, and VP9. They're kinda overpriced and over hyped. The MP7 is a bad gun btw

Kel-tec - (I suppose you could use "Kel") Someone take the crack away from their engineers. They make cheaper guns that are sometimes the absolute best thing on the market (CP33), and other times just a very weird product that doesn't make sense to exist (PR57).

IWI/IMI - The gun company sorta owned by the state of Isreal, their one claim to fame is the Uzi, made by Uziel Gal, who was supposedly kind of an asshole. Every gun they made afterwards was licensed, they just make stuff for the isreali military, and sell stuff to the US too. They make an Ar-15 clone called the "ZION-15". Let that sit in your mind before you buy something from them. They also make the Uzi Pro, which is a micro uzi pistol, with a plastic receiver to make it cheaper to manufacture than the original Uzi's. Its really ugly, overpriced, and you're better off buying a Mac 10 from Masterpiece Arms. IWI used to make the Desert Eagle, before Magnum research started making everything in the USA instead of licensing it to Isreal. Magnum Research is owned by Khar Arms now.

2025-01-26: I forgot, but I was intending to mention IWI because of their gun names, the Uzi, the Galil, and Jericho

Khar Arms - There is nothing to say about this company, I believe they only stay in business because of the Desert Eagle. They make some basic pistols that actually look unique, but there's nothing else, I would assume their guns are reliable at least.

Kimber - A company that was so dogshit at making the 1911, that everyone from Boomers to Zoomers knew not to buy their products. Supposedly they're starting to get out of their rut, and they make some pretty looking 1911 pistols.

Sturm Ruger - American gun company where the owner was actually a bit of a dick and liked to comply with gun restrictions, and supported magazine capacity restrictions. Its likely why the Ruger 10/22 and Mark pistols only held 10 rounds until Ruger as a company started making 25 round stick mags for the 10/22. They also made the Mini-14 which is a smaller version of the M14. Its not that good, but its used frequently against the Ar15 in bad legality arguments. All of their current products are pretty reliable and affordable, besides the previous CEO's opinions, they're a decent company.

Sig Sauer - DO NOT BUY ANY PRODUCTS FROM THIS COMPANY. This is not even about the moral issues like with IWI, SIG SAUER USA GUNS ARE NOT SAFE. Sig Sauer USA is a completely seperate company from the old German Sig Sauer, and the Swiss SIG. Sig now makes containers, Sig Sauer Germany was closed down because they kept trafficking arms, and Sig Sauer USA is now owned by Ron Cohen, who has not been able to answer why their P320s keep shooting randomly. Their products are notoriously unreliable, of poor quality, using parts usually made in 3rd world countries in order to be cheaper, and they had a lawsuit against them for an old women who was constantly sexually harassed by her supervisor at the USA factories. Their MCX rifles and SMGs are known to break randomly, the Cross had a safety issue where the gun could fire upon closing the bolt, the SPEAR has barrel mounting issues where with only your bare hands, could BEND the barrel mount side to side. They are an awful company and have nothing to do with the old Sig 550 rifles and P226 or P210 pistols that were actually decent, if a bit outdated. Bad company, bad to mediocre guns. There are huge rumors that Sig Sauer USA is in bed with some higher ups in the US Military, as Sig won the contract for the military's new service pistol, new service rifle, new service beltfed machine gun and for service ammunition production. Fudd Blasters and Protraband on youtube have made videos on them, explaining in detail what is bad about them. Their guns aren't even that revolutionary or anything, they're just cheap.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BSlleZOxy9g

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1RIvHsZZ9ho

Smith & Wesson - Based in the US, they chase police contracts mainly. Their guns are actually pretty dang good, priced decently, although they mainly chase whatever other companies are doing. I personally wouldn't buy from them because they support the police so much.

Springfield - The Springfield armory that exists now is not that same Springfield armory that the US Government owned for producing guns. Springfield now is known for importing guns of dubious quality and function from Croatia. They used to import/make clones of HK G3 rifles, poorly. They paid a bunch of shills a while back when they brought in the VHS-2 rifle into the US to call the gun a really good product, but the gun was found out to be very mediocre and the shills were selling their guns after making reviews to bank on the artificial market.

Taurus - Before they started making their own G2 and G3 pistols, they got their entire name for copying Beretta pistols and S&W revolvers, cheaply. The G2 and G3 are affordable pistols that are actually very reliable, and thus are usually owned by people in poor situations. There's not much wrong about them as a company, besides making the Taurus Judge.

Walther - German company who made uhm, various, guns for a certain... Political party during the first half of the 1900s (Similar to BMW), they almost exclusively make sporting and defense pistols now. The Walther P99 and PDP pistols are very good, and they make various Olympic style pistols and rifles for professional shooting like the GSP Expert. 100 years ago, we would be calling them the enemy, but currently they make guns for civilians and while they do sell the PDP towards police, I can't think of any notable use it has. The Walther P99 was extremely popular with police in the 90s though, and it's silloette is used on "No guns allowed" signs frequently.

[08melancholie]

Honeysuckle and Whiskey. — Micah Bell/OC

tags: Mid-Canon, Video Game: Red Dead Redemption 2 (2018), Chapter 1: Colter (Red Dead Redemption 2), Chapter 2: Horseshoe Overlook (Red Dead Redemption 2), Chapter 3: Clemens Point (Red Dead Redemption 2), Chapter 4: Saint Denis (Red Dead Redemption 2), Chapter 5: Guarma (Red Dead Redemption 2), Chapter 6: Beaver Hollow (Red Dead Redemption 2), How Do I Tag, Fluff, Angst, Smut, Angst and Fluff and Smut, just a dash of smut, mainly fluff and angst, Abuse, Past Abuse, Abusive Relationships, past abusive relationships, Grooming, Implied/Referenced Grooming, Pedophilia, Implied/Referenced Pedophilia, Colm O'Driscoll Being an Asshole, Torture, Burning, Stockholm Syndrome, descriptive torture, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, or a secret fourth thing, Sexual Tension, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Romantic Angst, Canon-Typical Violence, Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Attempted Sexual Assault

summary: Closed-off and rough; mean and unforgiving, uncaring and simply horrible. The apathetic cowboy draws himself no attention, usually. He's always sat around camp, slumped over a table or bent down, elbows on his knees as he cleans his guns or sharpens his knife, carving the one same piece of wood for days. He didn't talk much; he felt himself way too high above the others to even converse—exception being Dutch.

That's who Micah Bell was, simply. She couldn't change it.

Micah Bell is a threat to anyone that crosses his path, and Melody knows it. So why has she gotten herself so involved with the outlaw? She tried to keep to herself countless of times; he hated her, she wasn't a pure American and that alone should have been enough to draw her away—and yet it simply never did.

Maybe it was just a rebound, wanting to feel something after feeling nothing from her horrible, previous partner—similar in many ways to the blonde cowboy—for years. Maybe it was his careless and cocky demeanor she never failed to give a chuckle to. And maybe, it was something more. She was going to figure it out, one way or another. They would; together.

a/n: ive had this cooking for months and this is the first of it im posting so im VERY nervous... :( it was going to be a long oneshot at first BUT im forcing myself to do it in chapters so that i have to continue writing it because ive neglected it for months now. also tags are going to change a lot probably

words: 2,658 | AO3 LINK I. — MASTERLIST

The wind picked up quicker than before as Melody rode along Colm through the storm. She could feel her body shivering no matter how many layers of coats and undershirts she put on before riding out. She gently brushed her horse's nose, trying to comfort her through the storm. "You reckon we're gonna find it soon? Joey said it's nearby.." She spoke up, looking to the man to her left.

"Surely. Hold on a bit longer." He replied coldly, riding his horse through the piles of snow effortlessly. She picked up her pace too, riding alongside his steed. "We gotta push a bit more." He added, his gloved hand rested on his lap.

She continued riding until the blizzard started clearing off, and they had a better view of the landscape before themselves. That's when he and Melody both noticed it; an abandoned outpost, exactly what Joey found before parting with the gang to seek it out. "Is that it?" She asked, hand hovering over her forehead to get a better view and block out the snow falling from above. "It sure looks like it."

He halted his horse next to her. "Must be it, c'mon." He ordered, and she followed him down the mountain.

They hitched their horses outside, and she followed close behind Colm. With her hand on her holstered revolver, Melody snuck around behind Colm, checking rooms with caution. "Clear!" He yelled to the rest of the gang, who moved their carriages in and hitched their horses next to their own. "Good job spottin' this gem. I'm sure Joey will be here soon." He says to Melody, taking a cigarette out of his box and offering her one. She nods, taking the offered cigarette and popping it into her mouth.

He manages to light a match on the denim of his jeans, holding it up to the tip of his cigarette "I sure hope so. We ain't seen him a few days." Melody comments, letting him light her cigarette soon after his own. "We already been losin' too much folk." She adds.

"Don't you worry. I've got it under control; those were necessary sacrifices, child." He says, his words not as reassuring as she'd hoped. Still, she nods with a small smile at him and watches him return it.

She moved her few things into the cabin closest to Colm's—by his command. Melody huffed as she finished setting everything, walking out to check everyone else's progress. She observed them with another cigarette hanging from her mouth. "You done unpackin', kid?" Colm came up behind her, hands rested on his hips as he watched everyone work alongside Melody. "How quick you are." He adds.

Melody just chuckled, blowing smoke into the cold air above. "Yes, I'm done. Do you need any help? Anything I could do for you?" She asks him, awkwardly fiddling with the cigarette between her fingers.

"Maybe." He replies, placing his hand on her shoulder as he continues watching. "Got a train 'round here that needs robbin'. Buncha snobby, rich nobodies." He explains. "We need dynamite. I got a plan on how to rob 'em."

"I'm sure I can find myself a general store nearby, I'll buy some." Melody replies, puffing a cloud of tobacco into the air.

He firmed his grip on her shoulder, his grip tight. "Attagirl." He whispered into her ear, and she just exhaled with a weak smile. "That's why you're my favourite." His breath brushed against her ear, and it made a chill travel along Melody's spine.

First night in her own cabin was weird, everything about it—from the cold temperature swearing to kill her of frostbite, to insomnia from fear they were occupying someone's outpost and would be shot in their sleep—just felt off, and Melody found herself tossing in her restless state on the mildly uncomfortable bedroll.

So much has happened in the last few weeks; from having to move camp a dozen times, losing a few weaker members in the process—to Colm's weird obsession with a rival gang rising again after he swore they were done with it.

Melody got up and stretched her legs out, anxiously lighting her fourth cigarette today for any sense of warmth it'll offer. "Fuck this damned storm." She looked out of the window as the specks of snow danced around the air, covering more ground and raising the snow level, little by little.

She finished the cigarette in a few minuscule minutes, and climbed back under the thin covers, trying to get some shuteye before tomorrow.

"You sure you ain't wanna come, Melody? It'll do you good to go out'a bit." Colm straddled his horse, looking down at her before him as Melody stroked his horse's nose.

"I'm far too tired, Colm. Plus, I need to get started on some chores and.. fixing this place up a bit." She replied, looking around at the buried outpost grounds, covered with thick layers of snow.

He chuckled, a sense of lust in his eyes as he looked down. "That's my girl; always so hard workin' for old Colm." He praised. "Someone's gonna have to reward you nicely for your contributions." He chuckled slyly, making Melody scrunch up her nose briefly. "Well then, I'll leave you to it." He urged his horse forward with a swift kick in the ribs, leaving the camp grounds.

Melody sighed, turning to make a mental note of all that needs to be done around camp before starting her round of chores, running on one cup of warm coffee and two hours of rest. Just great.

Colm returned in a few hours, a crate of province and some dynamite on his horse's back. She walked over to him, grabbing the province to put it away. "Hey. You got the dynamite?" She questioned him.

He hitched his horse, taking the dynamite and walking close by Melody, towards his cabin. "Yeah.. Figured I'd get it off your hands since I knew you'd be workin' hard by the time I was back," He responded, chuckling. "and I see that I was right, my good girl's being very productive, ain't ya?" He opened his cabin door with his elbow, placing the dynamite in the corner.

Melody chuckled nervously; his words leaving a distaste in her mouth, per usual. "Well, thank you Colm." She replied simply.

"Anything for you, child." He walked up to her, placing a firm grasp on her shoulders again. "I saw someone all too familiar while ridin' to the store." He announces, releasing his hands and placing them behind his back.

"Do tell." She answered, sitting down on his desk, swaying her feet off the edge slowly as she hunched over and placed her forearms on her knees. He turned, a mischievous grin on his lips.

He paces around the room. "Little ole Hosea Matthews, saw him on my way there." He answers, and Melody is taken aback by his words; which Colm just chuckles at. "Yeah, I'm surprised he ain't seen me."

She cocks her head at him. "You reckon he ain't recognised you?" She asked. "All them years of conflict, you sure he ain't just ignored you in hopes of gettin' out in one piece?" She chuckled briefly.

He stops abruptly, laughing. "Oh, sweet child. You're quite funny." He walks over in her direction. "You could be right." He says, placing each hand on one side of her body, which stiffens at the contact; now trapped on the table. "You know, you're such a smart girl, I could lis-"

A not-so-distant gunshot goes off, scaring both people in the process. "The hell..?" Melody mutters, awkwardly slipping away from his entrapment to a window. "I reckon my theory was right.. except he also snitched." Colm walked up behind Melody, looking out of the window.

Outside stood a fraction of Dutch Van der Linde's gang; Arthur Morgan, Micah Bell, Hosea Matthews and—of course—Dutch himself.

"Ah, fuck." he cursed under his breath. "Okay, girl. You go cover me while I.. I need to move away from the area." He explains frantically.

"Yeah.. Yeah I can do that." Melody says—already used to this by now—and, taking her revolver out of its holster swiftly, walks up to the door. She opens it slowly, leaving it ajar for Colm to slip out as she starts shooting back, catching the leader's glimpse.

His accuracy is almost perfect as he glazed both a strand of her hair just above her ear and immediately catches on to start shooting at the door she finds shelter behind. She takes a shot of her own, missing the first but taking his hat off just above his forehead as he ducks.

The shootout was brutal; only a few of Colm's members survived it, with some successfully hiding away from the area as they searched the outpost. Melody watched them take the train plans, along with their dynamite, and hurry off while boasting about it all, feeling victorious.

"How is it my fault, Colm? I did my best to protect you, I managed to shoot one in the arm, too!" Melody defended herself against Colm's usual outburst when things go wrong; where he blames every soul but himself, no matter if it's nobody's or everybody's fault.

He grunted angrily. "I don't care! They took the plans, and we have to move again!" He complains. Melody opens her mouth to protest, but is met with his hand high in the air before her—threatening to strike; something she's all too used to. "Don't. I don't wanna see you talkin' back to me." He ordered firmly.

And yet she still attempts to speak—like the fool she is. "Colm, I'm just trying to-"

And there it is. She's met with a hard, rough slap of the back of his hand, knocking her to the floor as Melody clenches her rosy red cheek, already teary-eyed. She opens her mouth to apologise, but decides against it as she notices that look in his eyes. He shakes his head in disapproval at her on the floor, choking up a silent sob. And so, she just gets up and walks out to pack her things.

Packing didn't take nearly as long as expected; calming herself did. She had everything in one crate, and was sitting on the bedroll in the cabin with a burning sensation on her left cheek, and a few slow tears trailing her cheekbones and falling into her lap. This was like routine, really; he'd get mad and take it out on her, leave her alone to sulk and then-

The door opens slowly, and Colm's body slowly steps inside—like clockwork. "Hey.. don't be cryin' on me, my sweet Melody. You know.." He sits down on the bedroll next to her. "You know I do it out of love. You know I sometimes lose my temper, don'tcha?" He asked, interwinding his hand into Melody's, rubbing the back of her hand.

"Yes, Colm." She replies simply, looking down at the floor.

Another teardrop meets her lap and she quickly brushes her face with her sleeves.

"Look at me." He commands, placing a uncharacteristically gentle yet firm hand on Melody's chin. "I love you. You know I do." His voice is as firm as his touch, and she just silently nods. She can't help wondering if it's even close to true sometimes. You don't treat someone you love like this, she's well aware of that much. "Good. Good... And you love me too." It's less of a question, and more of a fact to him.

Melody chokes up a response to break the silence. "I do, Colm." She holds his hand just as firmly as he stands up. "Let me get your things, child." He takes the crate off of the nearby table. She just smiles downwards, walking beside him. And that's how the routine ends, every time.

"We'll drive the wagon, girl." He calls out as Melody start straddling her horse. She looks at him with protest, opening her mouth to talk. "Ah Ah.. C'mon, you're with me. Cassidy'll take good care of your horse." He taps the seat on the coach next to him-and she can't not-oblige, leaving the reins in Cassidy's hands reluctantly. "Attagirl." He watches Melody sit down next to him.

The ride to a new spot is painfully long, and Melody is shivering throughout the whole thing-despite having multiple layers of shirts and jackets and putting gloves on her hands this time. "Where're we goin'?" She asks him, breaking the tense silence among us.

"Off the mountain; there's a spot I scouted out." He replies, hands gripping the coaches reins firmly. "It'll be better for all of us to get out of the cold." He looks at her shivering quickly, snaking his hand around Melody's shoulder and pulling her closer to him.

She obliges and scoots closer, resting her head on his shoulder. "Thank the Lord, then." She snickers, and he exhales with a smirk. "I'll be more than glad to be off that damned mountain.

"Oh, I know; you're shaking like a leaf, girl." He chuckles. "It's a nicer spot too, you'll love it," He snuggles her body closer, pressing her up to his side. "all the best for my best girl." His gloved hand rubs her shoulder, gentle—not like Colm at all.

She soon feels herself—restless from the night before along with the shootout and what followed—start to drift off on his shoulder, and he lets Melody sleep for a little while. She hated how easily she could forgive him for doing what he does, but he might really just have a temper. He's trying. He's trying. That's all she knows, and it's just how he is. Right.

The stage stops at a nice, slightly open area with a few smaller huts and barriers around it. Colm nudges Melody awake slowly, rubbing rough circles on her shoulder. "We're here, girl." He whispers into her ear as she lifts her head off his shoulder and rubs her eyes awake. The warmth of the new location can be immediately recognized, nice and actually comfortable. "C'mon. You'll be in my cabin. With me." He reveals, jumping off the coach as she follows.

"I'll be in the same cabin as you?" Melody repeats his words, puzzled, as she takes her crate with a grunt before following him. He nods his head, stopping before—obviously the biggest cabin—their spot.

"Of course, child." He simply replies, taking the crate she held off of her hands and walking inside. "Ain't it great?" Melody silently nods to answer, almost reluctantly. "Go get the rest of the things from the coach and meet me here." Melody quickly turns on her heels and walks out back to the coach.

They both finish unpacking around the same time, and Melody patiently waits for him to finish whatever on the edge of a cot. "Okay, girl." He firmly taps his thighs and stands up, beckoning her to follow him outside. She obliges quickly, walking right behind him. He calls everyone in a circle, explaining a new score he's gotten information for. Melody can feel herself distracted and spacing out, knowing she won't be invited to the job—per usual, Colm just doesn't trust her enough to let her go with him. As infuriating as it is, her hands are tied.

Maybe she'll get that luxury one day.

Kudos on AO3 always appreciated! I'm honestly so glad to have even just the first chapter of this fic out, as it's been collecting dust in my drafts until the one month deadline—literally the last possible day.

[giggly-moon]

First of many prompts to come your way! Could I have a mix of 17 & 20 with Elpenor, Polites & Eurylochus? & if you’re feeling up to it, you can toss Odysseus into the ring as well

17: being chased or trying to hide

20: double teaming on someone

A/N: FIRST PIECE OF WRITING IVE FINISHED IN YEARS LETS GOOO! this was a very fun one to start out with, elpenor anon if you ever see this i got most of my inspiration for how to write elpenor from you and i hope i make you proud. also! i’ll still be accepting requests even after your birthday ends cause i’m having a lot of fun <3 (the prompts list is in my pinned post!) anyway enjoy

“Coming through!”

The small group of soldiers going about their normal everyday tasks quickly dispersed to make way for the youngest of their group, just barely managing to move out of the way in time to avoid Elpenor barreling into them. They watched him go with slight confusion that quickly vanished upon hearing a shout of “Hey! Get back here!” shortly after.

Of course, Elpenor ignored it, only letting out a slightly nervous giggle in response. His attempt to flee may end up being pointless in the end, but he would much rather attempt to delay the inevitable as much as he can than just stand there and accept his fate. He’s not a quitter.

Unfortunately for him, Polites doesn’t seem like much of a quitter either. Each time he turns a corner or jumps down a set of steps, anything to try and shake him off, he keeps catching up with him eventually. Elpenor blames those damn long legs of his.

He jumps another set of stairs and races down to where the cabins are, hoping that maybe he’ll have enough time to find a place to hide, but nearly crashes into a very startled Eurylochus.

“Elpenor?” Eurylochus grabs a hold of Elpenor’s arms to catch him, looking confused and slightly alarmed. “Is there something wrong?”

“Eurylochus! Perfect timing! Quick, you have to hide me!”

Eurylochus blinks down at him, opening his mouth to say something like “what did you do this time?” before the sound of running footsteps interrupts him. He looks up to see Polites coming up to them, looking rather out of breath.

“You… have way too much energy for your own good.” Polites pants out, and Elpenor flinches and whips around to face him, Eurylochus can see him hiding something behind his back.

“Can one of you please explain what’s going on?”

Polites narrows his eyes playfully and points an accusatory finger at Elpenor. “This little rascal stole my headband!”

“What?! No, no no no, i would never-“

“Oh, is that what this is?” Eurylochus casually tugs Elpenor’s arm up and out from behind his back, ignoring his squeaked out protests as he plucks the headband from his grip. He tosses it back over to Polites as if they were playing keep away, using one arm to hold Elpenor back when he tries to make a swipe for it.

“Thank you very much!” Polites chirps as he quickly ties the headband back around his head, before returning to glaring at Elpenor with his hands on his hips like an exasperated mother. “As for you, what do you have to say for yourself, mister?”

Elpenor can see that there’s a clear way out of this. Accept defeat and apologize for his act of theft, and Polites will probably let him off with only a stern look and a ruffle to the hair. He instead chooses to not do that. “You look silly with your hair all in your face.”

Polites gives him a very dry look for a moment, and he can hear Eurylochus stifle a chuckle behind him. “Wow. Eurylochus, hold him still for me please.”

“Will do.”

Elpenor didn’t even get a chance to process what he heard before two strong arms quickly wrapped around his torso, lifting him up off the floor and holding him against Eurylochus’ chest, who keeps him there near effortlessly even with all of his kicking and squirming. “Wait, wait, wait! Dohon’t you dare!”

“Was that a giggle i heard? Already?” Polites tilts his head with a look of pure mischief, Elpenor gave a shake of his head and pressed his lips together tightly to hold back even more giggles trying to spill out. “I think it was! And i haven’t even done anything yet.”

Elpenor has always been terrible at handling any sort of teasing, his face already burning red at his words. He tries kicking in Polites’ direction more purposefully this time, trying to keep him at a distance, but Polites dodges them and grabs hold of one of his legs instead. “But you’re going tohohoho!” His words trail off into bubbly laughter as Polites uses one hand to squeeze rapidly at his captured knee.

Polites raised an eyebrow at him. “Maybe we wouldn’t, if you hadn’t decided to provoke us even more with that comment.” He shares a look with Eurylochus, who takes it as his cue to adjust his hold on Elpenor and use one hand to dig into his ribs, sending him into a fit of cackles and snorts. “We’re just giving you what you apparently wanted.”

“What?!” Elpenor shrieks, making Polites snicker at the way his voice cracks. There’s really no point in denying it, he knew exactly what kind of grave he was digging for himself and he knows they can see right through him. That doesn’t stop him from denying it anyway. “Thahat is nohohot true!”

“What’s going on here?”

God fucking damnit.

Eurylochus halts his attack upon hearing the amused voice of their captain, but Polites is sure to keep Elpenor giggling even as he turns his head to address his friend. “Oh nothing. Just a well overdue attitude adjustment, that’s all.” He says with an almost innocent smile.

Elpenor fruitlessly tries to will Odysseus into leaving with his mind, because it’s one thing to be so rudely called out like that, but in front of their captain? Now that’s just plain cruel. But to his dismay, Odysseus just steps closer with a warm chuckle.

“I see. In that case, then,” Odysseus grabs hold of Elpenor’s other leg and moved a hand to lightly scratch at the underside of his knee, drawing out a loud squeal and even more cackling. “The backs of his knees are even worse.”

“TRAHAHAITOR!”