#and its not even like it would do anything bc people have reblogged it already

[vyeoh]

Just as a light reminder tommy has said he’s uncomfortable being depicted in dresses and skirts a few times

Oh my god can you people fuck off now

[ganondoodle]

got this reblog on one of my posts were i talked about being anxious about the future of the zelda series after totk and-

i even went back and unblocked them just to check my own post and check twice what they meant exactly- but i still dont know how they got to these conclusions

i never said i 'want a good uwu ganondorf' (bc that would mean hes aligned with hyrule bc thats how goodness works!!!!11!1!!!), i also dont think of any of the zeldas as 'whores' (seriously, where did that come from?? neither me nor the addition of someone agreeing with me said anything like that??? did they think bc the addition called tloz misogynistic means we think zelda is a whore????? huh???)

its also funny how they say they want zelda to stay a simple fairytale rather than have 'people like me' bc .. one point i talked about in the og post was how the evil arab thing VS good white people media likes to do so much is so normalized here that its simply seen as a simple harmless fairytale trope instead of a big underlying issue in general media and the writers might not even realize it (which is worse) bc the most 'generic' appeal is to people who dont think of it as a problem in the first place, because it is so normalized

(huh, i wonder about what kind of person that part was about .. hmmmm)

(ALSO funny they mention princess hilda as nuanced villain ... like ... wow they are so nuanced about purple haired people!!- like guess why we want a nuanced/less badly/less flat written ganondorf and what he, in particular, has not in common with other villains! its not his hair color! .... or was that point supposed to mean .. look we have one female character that is a villain, its not misogynistic! idk honestly)

(and the classic, "you just call it this/dont like it bc its not what you wanted !!!!!!!2!"1!112!!")

also funny how its 'never gonna be progressive enough' like asking for the franchise to maybe put a little more thought and nuance into their white divine right vs evil desert man simulator instead of making it worse is already asking too much

(i dont know what the last point has to do with anything??)

(also yes totk is racist, like most if not all of the franchise and a alot of other media as well, shocker- you can still like it though, i and plenty of other people are still fans of it, we just wish they did a little more with their stuff and maybe not make the racism problem WORSE)

(also yes the hyrule monarchy is also evil :))) )

(and also not so secretly so either :)) )

[goldenhypen]

TASTE ⎯⎯ l. heeseung

pairing. bf!heeseung x reader | genre. fluff, may come off as slightly suggestive

word count. 0.5k | warnings. depending on how a certain couple parts of this scenario are interpreted, like i said, this could be suggestive,, but ig that’ll just be up to your imagination and interpretation-

a/n. y’all have spoken and so here i am with a heeseung drabble :> ,,,, i,,, have never written anything like this before ahahhsjsjs and it’s not smth i intend to do more in the future bc it’s just not my style but i’m trying smth new today :’> ,,,, enjoy :’>

your lips appeared soft and plump in your compact mirror as you applied a newly bought lip gloss.

its flavour contained hints of vanilla, releasing a subtle warm sensation onto your taste buds, along with a sweet taste of strawberry.

you smacked your lips together.

with two drinks in hand, your boyfriend, heeseung, arrived back, meeting you at the table outside the little café where you sat.

“thanks, baby,” you said with a smile before automatically leaning in for a kiss.

your lips met his briefly before pulling away with an excited grin, attention already diverted from him as you were ready to take a sip of the refreshing beverage.

“mmm, you taste good,” he let out, causing your head to whip in his direction. his comment caught you off guard. “what is that?”

letting his words sink in for a moment, you smiled at the compliment, “new lip balm.”

“you taste amazing,” he expressed again, in an almost trance this time as he found himself already leaning in for more.

and what began as a simple kiss almost evolved into a passionate makeout if it wasn’t for you pushing him away.

“what are you doing?” you laughed. “there’s people around.”

“you taste good, i really like this new flavour on you. what is it?”

“strawberry vanilla,” you answered happily.

“that’s nice,” he stated, eyes unable to meet yours, only fixed on your lips instead. he probably wasn’t even hearing your words as his focus was clearly elsewhere at the moment. “can i kiss you again?”

thinking about it, it would be too easy if you just gave in… so you decided to mess with him a bit first.

“nope,” you turned your head away, bringing your drink to your mouth to take a sip, cooling your body from the heat of the warm weather.

and heeseung’s gaze only remained at your lips as you sipped down the liquid.

“but—why?” he frowned, moving slightly to finally look into your eyes and pull you closer.

“baby, i said there’s people around. if i let you keep kissing me, who knows what this is going to lead to?”

“then—” he began as he formed an idea into words, whispering the next part of his sentence by your ear, “why don’t we take this elsewhere? like elsewhere as in back home?”

“heeseung!” you exclaimed, growing somewhat flustered.

he sought for an answer in your eyes, and you attempted to conceal a smile. however, it turned to be of no use, and you gave up, already beginning to stand.

staring at him as he watched you with curious eyes, with your drink now in hand, you spoke.

“well? what are you waiting for? lee heeseung!” you snapped him out of his daze. “let’s go!”

a/n. and this is what i meant by how different this drabble would be if it was for jungwon- sjsjsjd like if you try reading it again but imagine jungwon in heeseung’s place instead,,, def a whole new vibe fr shdjdj anyways thanks for reading, and reblogs and feedback are appreciated as always :> thank u! <3

taglist (open). @seroriis @raimbows4u @sultrybaby @kpop-nct @beans-and-jeanes @enhacolor @enhasfever @nokacchan @yizhoutv @xiaoderrrr @soobin-chois @tyunni @shinsou-rii @sungbeam @softkpopplace @belle643 @nar-nia @rapmonie2047 @pshchives @sunjakes @ethereal-engene @exohclipse @yeosayang @koishua @4ri-ki @sunoksunny @jaeyunjakesim @tnyhees @enaus @hoes4hoseok @palajae @clarakyunisageek @annoyingbitch83 @mirula @rcrystallocks @stepout-09-15 @zeraaax @ktttwwn @pistachiophobia @svnoofy @sweetjaemss @vatterie @mnsnts

[spookykoolkat]

the red j.m. | chapter four

CHAPTER FOUR: NO GOOD

series masterlist | main masterlist |

previous chapter | next chapter

pairings: older!joel miller x plus sized!younger!reader

chapter summary: you've been in jackson for a month now and things are still a little rough. you haven't found the right crowd to fit into yet, and thought maybe you might have to settle for the family of four you already know, until you meet your patrol partner, tyler. unfortunately, joel doesn't seem to like the idea of you with any other man but him.

warnings: 18+ age gap (joel is 57, reader is turning 26), inappropriate thoughts, sexual language, teasing, touching, slight jealous!joel, x-rated descriptions, crude language, perv!joel, creepy!joel, mean joel not too mean tho, MDNI!!!

wc: 6.2k

na: HI! thank you for alllll of the love oh my god my little gothic heart is so full i love you guys!!! i hope this series is everything and more to you guys bc i love this so much! hopefully as chapters go by, i get better in my writing and hope everyone enjoys it! i appreciate all of your kind words and interactions with me and making me feel welcome since i am new to writing on tumblr and kind of took a six year break from writing oneshots/fanfictions LOL. anyways please enjoy this chapter things are g3tting a little hot and heavy :P I CANT WAITT i hope that my writing is cathartic for my big girls we do not get enough representation for us in stories and writings!please enjoy! smut coming soon fr fr LMFAOO

i appreciate all reblogs, likes and comments feel free to do any one of those things or ALL! if u think its deserved :P

⭒☆━━━━━━━━━━━☆⭒☆━━━━━━━━━━━☆⭒

DECEMBER 21ST, 2024

YOU

you’ve been in jackson for a month now. you couldn’t believe it, you truly had every doubt about staying even a week. but, it’s probably the calmest life you’ve lived in a very long time. you enjoyed it and you truly felt you’d made the right decision, it didn’t take much convincing either. but, you still haven’t unpacked the items maria gave you and continues to give you. just in case. 

the neighbors are learning your name, as you are with them, and they actually care. as much as you let them. you felt quite bad because you found yourself still not clicking with anyone around you. and you’ve tried. the people your age find you boring, almost a dark cloud over them, bursting their bubbles. younger kids only approach you because of ellie, asking for advice on stance and grip. the older group, around tommy and joel’s age, finds you a bit much. 

your language, your lack of social awareness–sometimes it gets embarrassing. saying something old heads wouldn’t necessarily like, being too blunt and a little explicit. joel figured you should hang around your age group, yet you didn’t really click in with the rest. he was far from embarrassed being around you, you just said the things he was thinking out loud.

you only found yourself clicking with joel. in many ways, as much as he let you. he was standoffish most of the time, barely cracking a smile at your weird habits and the noises you make when you’re passed out on the couch. he refused to let you break him, this wall that he had up to survive. do not get attached. he thought, maybe the less he knew you the less it’d hurt to have anything happen to you. but it seems even as little as he does know you, he’s still feeling that tug at his heart laying his eyes on you. 

it was too late. whoops.

joel doesn’t want to address that feeling, and he doesn’t want to call it as it is. he actually cares about you. he had no choice but to call it that, because why else would he lie to you about finding cassettes in the house?— so that you didn’t know what he really did to get you whatever he could get his hands on. 

he didn’t want you to know that he actually smuggled in goods that he and his family needed, and while bribing, stealing, trading and selling for necessities, he made it a mission to find at least one cassette tape for you. he didn’t know you actually saw him red handed, and you still didn’t know where those boxes were coming from. he figured if you knew, you’d bring it up. 

he made it his mission for two whole weeks, after your first week of staying with him, and finally got his hands on some actual music for you. joel hadn’t made efforts like this in a long time, and he knew that denying the fact that he at least cared for you would mean he was being delusional. 

but he was always worried about you. you were his object of affection and he craved to find a way to get you out of his mind. he actually felt guilty for thinking about you in ways you’ve probably never been before, he felt guilty for wanting nothing but to make you feel good—however that was. 

you doubted it strongly of course, shaking the feeling off as your own delusion and insanity, but you always hoped. hoped that maybe his generosity and southern hospitality was actually him caring about you in a different way, but he was a grown man. you tried to off yourself in front of him–you were insane to think he’d even look at you as anything but a liability, he hardly looked your way as it was. 

at least you thought so.

⭒☆━━━━━━━━━━━☆⭒☆━━━━━━━━━━━☆⭒

joel paid attention to every single thing he sees and hears. he doesn’t show it, he doesn’t acknowledge it—all he does is observe. some more than others. 

you didn’t talk to him unless he talked to you, you kept your distance like he wanted, but somehow he knew everything that was going on. he didn’t have to talk to you to know you, and that’s what he was ashamed of. he watched you. 

he was a creep, he felt like someone who was abnormal and making things weirder than they had to be. he was studying you and you didn’t even know. he picked up on what made you smile, which cassettes you listened to the most, which just so happened to be the ones he was ‘holding on to.’ and in the midst of observing you, he checked you out any time he got. 

when you weren’t looking mostly, but even sometimes when you were talking to him about something not so important. he realized that if you did see that his eyes wandered over you, you were probably gaslighting yourself into thinking he wasn’t doing exactly what you thought he was doing. he loved your body. and he loved the way you dressed your body, the way the shirts you wore always clung to your heavy breasts, how even when you dressed in baggy clothes he still wanted to ruin you like that. 

sick. you’re a sick old pervert, ya kno’ that? he knew. what joel didn’t know is why you made him feel this way, why you drove him to do the things that he does for you. why he acted feral every time you bent over, why he would storm out of the room when you got on your hands and knees to pick something you dropped up off the floor. 

but he also studied you because he wanted to make sure you weren’t feeling how you felt the night you woke up in jackson, to make sure you weren’t feeling depressed or like you didn’t want to be here anymore. just talk to her fucker. he couldn’t. he would never admit it, but he’s eavesdropped near ellie’s garage to hear conversations between the two girls. 

“ellie, i mean it, you cannot tell joel.” you hushed as you glanced towards the door, back to ellie. 

she scoffed. “like i’d tell him, lay it on me.” you noticed the irritation in her eyes when you brought up joel, asking yourself if maybe there was something that wasn’t being said. you just put a pin in it. 

“okay. one, i’m finally allowed a gun and i got my patrol route.” you cheered in a hush and joel almost pressed his ear into the door. 

ellie rolled her eyes, grabbing the piece of paper. “no fucking fair. good looks, telling me bad news first. what’s two?” she joked. 

“i met my patrol partner. his name’s uh, tyler? i think. yeah,” you looked down and nodded, assuring yourself. joel made it a note to tell ellie how thin her walls were, not right now though. 

“tyler… tyler m?” joel thought of every man in this town named tyler with the letter M as his last name. instantly made a mental list of five tylers. 

“i don’t know. but he asked me for a drink. tonight, he was gonna meet me here but i told him i’d meet him there. lesson number 5, always have a way to leave anywhere you are if you need to.” you said. you figured it’d be best to teach her as much as you could, telling her things she needed to hear to survive. 

that’s how joel knew immediately what was happening when he heard your soft singing from your cracked door. you were getting ready for him. he actually hated it. he couldn’t remember the last time he felt that heat in his chest, biting the tongue—it wasn’t until his face turned down into the old familiar feeling, what he recognized as jealousy. 

who was he to be jealous? for what? it was a saturday night, most people were off of work, and everyone was settling in the town’s circle to drink and watch movies. everyone but joel. he was now classified as a bitter old man, with a dark whiskey in his glass. maybe now a bitter, creepy old man as he knocks slightly on the cracked door and you invite him in. 

you were fixing the laces on your shoes, simple black converse, and his eyes made his way up from there to your face. a deep v neck shirt that looked like a second skin from how tight it was, and faded black jeans with tiny holes from being lived in that hugged the fat of your thighs. he never noticed the gold dainty necklace that sat in the middle of your chest, but it sits right between the curves of your breasts. were they always that big? he felt like a kid, ogling and asking stupid questions.  

“hellooo? joel?” you called to him as you rested your palms on the width of your thighs. he saw your lips, coated in a sheen and your hair split down the middle instead of being in a pony tail or bun. creepy old man. you’re being creepy joel!!! he shook his head. 

“headin’ to the circle?” he asked. if he were close enough you could smell the whiskey on his breath. 

“yeah i-,” you thought for a minute. joel didn’t trust the next person as much as you did. you saw his protectiveness through ellie, you felt maybe he’d feel the same for you. even if you were a bit delusional. 

“-was gonna catch a movie with ellie, most likely be back around 12.” you said as you glanced at the clock, 9:32. 

“‘s that right?” he said suggestively, like he knew something you didn’t. he did. 

“yeah. that’s right,” you stood firm, even shot him a dirty look. “why don’t you enjoy the night, joel. you got the house to yourself, ain’t that what you’ve been mopin’ around for?” you stood up and grabbed your gun to put in your waistband behind your shirt, sticking a knife in your high top converse and one in your jean pocket. 

maybe you got too defensive, but you were right in a way. he looked miserable around the house, storming in just to grab a beer and lock himself in the library or room. 

“that’s right,” he was just smug. so smug you couldn’t stand it, you wanted to slap him. 

“whatever joel,” you wanted to be right so bad. you wanted to prove to even yourself that you were right. but neither of you were buying into this act you played, and you knew it. he was making you nervous with his stare, the hard shell you had was practically ripped off of you when he grabbed your wrist before you left the room. he held you, shoulder to shoulder and looked at your face, down your neck and to your chest. 

“if you need anythin’, you let me know darlin’.” darlin’? it was so foreign to you, so alien that you didn’t even have time to process it before your mouth moved to say a small alright and taking your arm from his grip. when you did, it was cold and you could feel the print of his hand around your wrist down the stairs. 

it was so different, something that leaked off of his words when he spoke to you. and you wanted to hear more of it, explore that with him. 

⭒☆━━━━━━━━━━━☆⭒☆━━━━━━━━━━━☆⭒

before you could psych yourself out of going through the bar’s doors, you heard someone call for your name and turned your head to the left to see tyler, walking towards you with a big grin on his face. tyler was just two years older than you, someone you met while you were in combat and patrol classes, and didn’t acknowledge until he approached you, re-introducing himself as your partner for the first two weeks. you couldn’t be cold and shoo him away, you just smiled and introduced yourself, really looking at him. 

he was not joel miller. tyler’s skin wasn’t as tan as joel’s but he wasn’t pale, and he was actually a bit lanky even under the thick coats he layered. you noticed that his chest wasn’t as broad and strong as joel’s, hell his arms were smaller than yours. he was a skinny tall thing, while you were a bit short and thick everywhere. and when he embraced you lightly at the entrance of the bar, you just felt cold. no warmth, no comfort, you felt like you’d break him. 

“hey, i was hoping you’d actually come.” he breathed in as he pulled away, still, it wasn’t feeling right. 

“why wouldn’t i?” 

“cause you’re out of my league,” he said with a seductive smile and you wanted to believe him. wanted to enjoy the night as it comes and maybe have a few drinks, talk. but your mind was on a bitter man who sat in a house all by his lonesome. 

the thing about ‘dates’ now is that small talk doesn’t happen anymore. what’s your mom like? she’s dead actually. really? mine too! it was pointless. if you ended up here, you knew that you were alone. 

it wasn’t long before you and tyler were sitting on two stools, side by side. your knees were in between his as the two of you talked, flirted, gave simple touches. you were having fun. doing what would seem normal at a bar, just enjoying the company of someone who actually liked you. 

“how come you’ve never hung out with anyone else? i never see you with anyone.” he said, his fingers tapping on your knee. 

“mmm, i’m just not for everyone.” you flirted, covering his fingers with yours. you knew this wasn’t going anywhere, but you’d like to live in it just a little longer. the touch of a man, someone who desired you even if it wasn’t how you wanted. something you started to crave from joel. 

“maybe you’re just for me then?” he suggested, and you decided to just play into it. it was kind of hard not to when you were thinking of joel, you needed to act out on it. 

“i doubt that, honey,” you said, tugging at the collar of his shirt. he smelled like tequila and grass, something not that appealing but you ignore it. you wanted something out of him tonight, because for some reason the words joel spoke to you kept ringing in your ears. if you need anything, you let me know darlin’. the words rumbled through your body and straight to your core, because if there’s anything you need he could definitely be of help. 

you didn’t know how long you stayed at this bar, teasing and touching each other until you felt the ache in your core, aching for a touch that you’ve had once before. but you didn’t give a shit about purity or virginity, you wanted the ache gone and you knew tyler was the best bet. 

“tyler,” you whispered in his ear as the bar started to empty. 

“yes, beautiful?” he answered and slid his hand up your thigh. 

“show me how good you are with your fingers, yeah?” 

⭒☆━━━━━━━━━━━☆⭒☆━━━━━━━━━━━☆⭒

he followed you back to joel’s, hand in hand as you turned the key to the house and softly opened the door to prevent the creaking. granted, you didn’t think this through, like everything else. maybe you should’ve gone to his. you cringed a bit, walking inside. 

it was dark inside, nothing but the sizzle of a freshly put out fire. you put your fingers to your lips to shush him, taking him slowly upstairs and to your room. you couldn’t help but find yourself glancing at joel’s door, which is cracked open. 

you finally made it to your room with the lanky man groping your body and trying to slither you out of your jeans, letting him. 

“only want your fingers, okay? if not you can leave.” you established as you stood in your panties and tight shirt. 

“fuck, yeah that’s okay,” tyler himself was craving a woman’s touch, he didn’t even care if he got off. he just wanted to see you, a woman’s body, to feel you. 

“can i touch you? like anywhere?” he asked as he sat on the edge of your bed, his cock already hardened against his pants. it didn’t sound right coming from him. you wondered what it’d sound like with the texas twang you craved to hear from a certain man. 

it still made your core twinge a bit, remembering the last time you were this vulnerable. you couldn’t lie, even if it wasn’t what you wanted, you fell in to the odd touch of the man desperately trying to touch you. 

“anywhere. keep your dick in your pants, i’ll touch as i go if you want me to.” you moved over to him and crawled into your bed, and he slipped in next to you as he propped himself on his elbow to look at you. 

“you’re so pretty, really.” he said, genuinely and you smiled. your stomach even fluttered a bit. it’s been a long time hearing that, hearing desire. 

“touch me, please.” 

tyler took his time, a little more than you’d liked but he was busy distracted with the way your tits pushed up to your chin, like you were suffocating. touching and teasing, his touch felt good but it still didn’t feel right, it didn’t feel heartstopping. maybe you’re expecting too much. 

but he didn’t talk to you when he dipped his hand in your panties, you just heard his whimpers and panting as he rutted his hard on into the side of your fat thigh, barely focused on you. you weren’t feeling it anymore, your wetness wasn’t even directed towards him really. everything you did with him was what you wanted to do with joel. you weren’t interested anymore and it started to feel wrong, it never felt good because tyler wasn’t worried about you. just his nut, and you didn’t like that. you didn’t like to feel used. 

“okay, wait, wait—i said wait!” you said and grabbed his wrist, pulling it from your panties and moving off of the bed. 

“wait, fuck i’m sorry, i was just so, fuck i’m so sorry.” he said a bit loudly, and you swore you heard a creak in the hallway as you moved to the door. 

“it’s okay, i just, i’m not–i’m tired. i think you should go.” you said, hugging your arm as he adjusted himself in his pants and got up. 

“i’m sorry, i,-” he tried again and you waved him off. 

“it’s done and forgotten, you didn’t do anything you were just really into it. i wasn’t.” you were careful with your words, not as tough as you would be because you’re vulnerable. but he wouldn’t get far if he hurt you, you knew that. 

“i’m sorry, goodnight. can we kind of like, forget this?” he asked rubbing the back of his neck and you softly laughed. 

“forget what?” you smiled and he returned it, giving a small kiss on the cheek before he left. he was a nice man, a good kid, and he meant no harm. he didn’t need a ruthless beating or yelling, just needed to tell him it wasn’t meant to be. you couldn’t shake the feeling of how wrong it was, how wrong it felt being tyler touching you. 

you knew who you wanted to touch you. as sweet and kind and charming tyler was, he wasn’t what you wanted. the man you wanted was across the hall from you, on the other side of the stairs. sleeping, maybe. 

you knew ellie was at a friends house doing only god knows what, so with the hope in mind that joel was asleep in his room, you trotted downstairs braless, and bottomless. you were still in the same tight shirt you left in, but now just in the pink panties that were apart of the gifts maria got you. just new/traded clothing you needed. the shirt hugged you and cut off at the dip of your curve, the fat of your tummy slightly protruding between the shirt and your panties. 

you didn’t look towards the fireplace where the sofas were, instead you grab a small cup and let faucet water pour into it, taking a drink. 

“work up a sweat?” a deep southern voice said behind you, from a distance. you jumped at the sudden break of silence and turned quickly to the sofas. 

“joel? what the fuck,” you breathed and stepped out to walk to the sofas. somehow, you completely disregarded the fact that all you had on was a shirt and panties, standing in joel miller’s living room. 

“what made you think it was a bright idea to invite a bastard in my home like that? not only that,” he said. you finally saw the light from outside shining on his face as he stood up, something glimmering in his hand. a gun. “but letting him touch all over you? that prick?” 

you had a lot to say, a lot to yell out. but the only thing to say was a snarky comment. “you know he called you the same thing.” 

which, he did. but you were too drunk on the flirting and drinks to care or to know why, even though you already knew. joel wasn’t nice to anyone but ellie. tommy and maria even think he’s an asshole, but that’s tommy’s brother and maria’s brother in law. he’s family. but there were things that you didn’t know about joel miller. things he didn’t want you to know either. 

“why do you even care? who’s touching me, i mean.” you scoff, feeling less embarrassed about your state of clothing. but being a lot more aware as he steps closer and closer to your curvy figure, putting his gun in the waistband of his sweatpants. 

he was intimidating like this. towering over you with his fists clenched, searching your face for something. you felt your heartbeat pick up as his eyes raked over you and fell on your lips. he was drunk off of you, the sight of your fat cunt only being clothed by a single piece of fabric drove him to dig his nails in his palms. the nakedness of your thighs, and the midriff showing—it was going to kill him.

“if you’re gonna fuck these town folk, make sure it ain’t in my house.” he spit, and you just rolled your eyes. you felt like you were in trouble for sneaking out, like a teenager. 

“i didn’t fuck anyone. we didn’t do anything. he wanted to, i didn’t.” you defended, feeling small now but still holding yourself tall.

joel just looked at you, not wondering if you were lying or not. he knew you weren’t, he heard it himself the minute he heard something bang against your wall. it was just you shuffling to get up, and he heard you consoling him. you weren’t satisfied. 

“why’d you lie to me? bout’ seein’ him tonight?” he asked, your head tilted up to his as he steps one step closer. your chest is almost touch his, and your breathing was getting heavier. 

“figured you wouldn’t trust him,” you said, sounding like you wanted to say something else but keeping it to yourself. 

he was watching you like you were his prey. like you were something he wanted to take and devour for himself, like you were something for his eyes only. 

“smart girl,” 

“he touch you wrong?” he couldn’t help but ask, the curiosity killing him slowly as time passes with you standing in front of him with your tight pink panties on. he looked down between the two of you and saw the hardened pebbles that were your nipples showing up through your black tight shirt, down to your tummy that was pressed against his. he liked the softness of your belly, he was practically dying to grip it himself. he wanted to grip every part of you, to palm your pussy and feel how warm you were in his grip. he even found himself hating his own mind as thought of what your pussy would look like sucking him in. 

“i, he,” you were stuttering, embarrassing yourself as his hand trailed up your arm, thinking of all the ways he could watch you take his cock for him. 

you watched him watch you. how his eyes went dark again, how there was a slight touch of possessiveness in his voice. you didn’t assume though.

“can’t find the words, hm? he wasn’t makin’ you feel good?” he asked softly, watching as you closed your eyes and breathed through your mouth, opening again to see a small grin playing on his lips, his head tilted to the side. his fingers barely left your wrist, and made their way to your fleshy hip, tapping against the bare skin. he was enjoying this. making you squirm. making you nervous. 

“fuck off, joel,” you meant it to come out a lot stronger than it did, even you thought you sounded needy. “s’ none of your damn business,” you spit, stronger this time.

and before you could even wallow in your retorts, a smile tugged very faintly at his lips. you weren’t so convincing when you were practically trying to pull him to your body with your fists buried in his sweater. he appreciated the effort though, he's never met someone with as much bite in their bark as you.

he just liked to watch you writhe for him. you wanted to whine with how eager you were for him, how mean he was being to you for no reason. you needed him.

“it’s like you’re not even tryin’, what’s the matter? do i make you nervous sweetheart?” he gleamed in his power over you, the way your eyes searched for him and your mouth parted, just for him. he wanted to ruin you in every way. ruin every man for you, show you how to truly be taken care of.

"go fuck yourself," you retorted and he actually laughed. and he laughed at you. a sudden heat rushed to your cheeks, embarrassment filling you.

“i didn’t tell you but,” he paused as he leaned into your ear, grazing his cheek against yours and smiling to himself, “you looked real pretty today, ya know that? you look even prettier like this, all flustered for me.” 

you had to be dreaming. had to have gone to sleep after tyler left, and this was your wet dream making up for it. there was no way you were this exposed to joel and he was practically pressed up against your body as he told you how pretty you looked. you couldn’t speak, your tongue was tied and joel smiled to himself as he realized he got you to shut up.

“would ya let me touch you, sweet girl? maybe you'd be nicer if someone knew how to touch you,” he asked, his fingers playing on your hip. 

you still couldn’t answer. it felt like a trap, like if you let yourself give in to his words, every guard you put up was pointless. you were frozen, and suddenly felt insanely vulnerable but his voice was so inviting, so impossible to not fall into.

“touch me where?” you asked, treading lightly. you wanted to hear it, you wanted him to tell you he wanted you as bad as you wanted him. you wanted to prove to yourself that you hadn't lost your mind yet. but you also wanted to stretch whatever this was as long as possible before you find yourself on your knees for him without even asking.

joel felt like he was out of his body. like he was watching you squirm and move under his presence from above. he was so distracted by how hard your nipples were rubbing against him that he didn’t even notice your fists balled into his shirt, trying to take him in closer. maybe it was the alcohol he drank to ignore the jealousy he felt, or maybe it was the fact that tommy came to tell joel about the boy you were seeing. how the two of you were practically on top of each other before he left, how he was touching you in public–he was angry. 

nothing was done, nothing more than joel grabbing your almost bare hip and you tugging on his shirt, but it still felt like something that was crossing a line. a line you wanted to cross.

until he got the courage to grab the hand that was buried in his sweater, taking it in his own and touching you with your hand. he was answering your question. his hand ghosted on top of yours as his eyes watched your eyes train on the sight between the two of the bodies, enjoying how soft and pink you look. you were hot and bothered, and he could get used to seeing you like this. 

“first place i’d touch you, baby,” he breathes, his lips practically against your cheek now. he was breathing you in, drinking you in, “is right here,” 

his hand guided you to cup your mound, angry that it wasn’t his hand touching you. your breath was shaky while you watched him, your eyes flickering from his moving hand to his eyes, and every time he made sure your eyes latched onto his. he wanted you to know how much he was enjoying teasing you like this, he wanted you to remember the way he looked at you while you panted against him. 

“but like this, lemme show you ‘xactly how i’d touch you sweetheart,” he was lost, drunken only on you, ignoring the world around him. “don’t think that boy would be enough for a woman like you, ain’t that right?"

he took his own hand as you were still pressed against his front, his lips now teasing the skin of the crook of your neck and starting to pull your panties away from your skin to dip his hand inside. your breathing was uneven and your soft whimpers were getting louder the more he trailed down into your underwear, and he was loving them.

the second he felt the scruff of your unshaved mound, he heard you release a shaky, sexy breath, and he grew harder against your bare abdomen. even feeling the heat of your skin on his clothed cock made him want to get on his knees and worship you.

"needy little fuckin' thing, that desperate for me huh? you gonna let me feel this pretty pussy how i want?"

he was so fucking filthy. so filthy for someone who hasn't even seen you naked, so filthy for someone who didn't even talk to you before this. it was agonizing, you were melting into his harsh words and wanted to listen to him make you feel small like this all night.

"joel, i swear," you warned as his breath hit your lips with his eyes on yours.

you had a bush, he thought to himself. he really didn’t think that would turn him on of course,  but now he pictured you standing in front of him, bottomless. how your belly would look with your curves, the way your breasts would rest at their natural position, your thighs fat and wide all for him, and the pretty fat mound waiting for him to feel and taste. worst time to think all of that of course, because it sent a flood of blood and excitement to his groin, giving him another thing to be nervous about. but god did he want to see it, see all of you laid in his bed, and tugging on the thatch of hair on your mound. he was fucked.

and god forbid you figured out that he’s been picturing you bent and folded in every way just so he could reach to the back of your cervix, if you figured out that his anger towards you is pent up sexual frustration because every time you’re in the shower, he’s thinking of the way you looked lathered in soap, waiting for him to join you. he was a sick man to think of you like this, but all of his desires and fantasies were threatening to barge in, to unleash all of his wants and needs to you. 

he was fighting himself to be a respectable man, a man who doesn’t think of women who were young enough to be his own kid in ways that were sinful. he shouldn’t be wanting to fill your throat with his cock when you smart mouth him. he was losing whoever he thought was himself, and letting heart and cock do his thinking. 

you couldn't think right, nothing was processing as you felt the heat of his hand on your cunt. you felt another wave of pleasure hit you and suddenly, you could feel your wetness pooling for him in your panties. you had a hard time wrapping your head around the fact that joel actually wanted you too, even if he wanted to put you in your place for once and shut you up.

you didn't care how he wanted you. you were a bitch, but you were desperate for him.

"mmm, you're real scary, baby, threats ain't gettin' you anywhere. you have t' beg me for my fingers," he teased, rubbing the hair on your mound.

"oh fuck off, i'm not begging you for shit," you're putting up a fight with yourself, and you were winning. at leadt you thought so. even if you were letting him touch you this way, you weren't goping to beg him or give him the pleasure of watching you submit to him.

"yeah? maybe i'll jus' make ya," he grinned, his sinister smile forming while he rested his forehead on yours, his hand inside your panties as the two of you watched him tease your lips.

the second joel’s finger moves from your hairy mound to the fat lips of your cunt to spread and feel just how much you ached for him, to tease your hole so you'd be sent into a fit of desperation, the two of you heard the doorknob jiggle and a loud laugh from the outside, meaning it was ellie. joel pulled his hand and body away quickly and nodded upstairs with a hard look, giving you the hint to go before ellie saw you in your panties. 

your face expressed everything to him, you needed him. and you didn’t want to let go. he watched as you walked up the stairs, your ass practically eating up the fabric of your panties. it left nothing to the imagination and he groaned, something you swore you heard, before he fixed himself in his pants. 

ellie walked in, and you stayed at the top of the stairs out of sight to hear the lecturing. 

“are you outta your damn mind, ellie? it’s three in the mornin’,” his paternal instincts were coming out, and you smiled. 

“i was down the street. relax, i just didn’t want to stay there.” ellie defended as she slipped her shoes off. 

“did somethin’ happen? are you hurt?” he asked quickly, examining ellie to see if he saw blood or cuts anywhere. 

“jeez, no joel lay off. why are you up anyways isn’t it like six hours past your bedtime?” she scoffed, annoyed at the father figure lecturing her right now. what was he gonna tell her? 

“was waitin for your friend to come home, so i can lock up before bed,” he lied. he was lying and you knew it. you came home an hour ago, and he was still up. 

“you’re in love aren’t ya? old man,” ellie teased. her demeanor was a little more playful than she’d been this last month and he shook his head annoyed, but to you it was silent. your lips pinched into a thin line as you heard joel grunt.

“go to be ellie. now.” he ordered and she rolled her eyes, saying her good nights and going to the garage to sleep in her space. 

a part of you wanted joel to come upstairs, into your room and to do everything he wanted to do. you didn’t know exactly what he wanted to do, but with the touching and flirting he was doing, it seemed like he wanted you. maybe he was drunk, you could smell it on his breath! he seemed pretty sober talking to ellie. you cursed yourself as you moved quietly to your room, leaving the door cracked open just in case. 

but nothing. you heard him trudge up the stairs, and walk directly the opposite direction into his own room. you were frustrated at this point. sexually frustrated if you must say, and the ache in your core was not leaving any time soon. 

you felt embarrassed, and you felt like joel was toying with you. all of the sudden this comes up and he's trying to finger fuck you in the living room when you genuinely thought he didn't even acknowledge your mere existence. it was so confusing for you, but the only thing you knew for sure now after a few weeks of deciding is that you craved joel miller.

it was a weird feeling. only because growing up in an apocalyptic world as a teenager and a young adult meant your chances of love and relationships were slim to none, at least for you. but you met joel in times where you had given up already.

as you lied in bed, wondering if joel was asleep or thinking about you too, you felt silly. you were setting yourself up for disaster by having hope that whatever this was with joel was more than that, and not just that. you worried you were getting ahead of yourself, maybe you were taking joel's advances too seriously. what if he just wants an easy fuck? nothing serious, something for pleasure in this dark world where everyone seeks a way to alleviate their pain

you felt like maybe you were geting into your head like you always do. maybe this could be good. maybe this could be your chance to let go, be vulnreable again, let someone make you feel like a teenager again. you had your fair share of crushes when you were in the QZ, you remembered that innocent feeling of liking someone, the shyness that came with it, how nervous you got around them. and with joel, you felt that times one hundred.

the flutters in your stomach, the goosebumps on your skin when he stands too close to you. he made you feel good even without trying.

but nothing good comes from joel miller.

[aprilmayverse]

mayverse dash simulator 2 but this time its if they had a fandom

💀 winered Follow "we need more complex mentally ill female characters" you people couldnt even handle june july.

💄 october-november Follow why are we all acting as if april was in the wrong for not wanting to traumadump on a literal child?

👠 pinkbitchnamedbreakfast Follow she literally did not tell her anything

💄 october-november Follow did she not tell her about the poisioning.

👠 pinkbitchnamedbreakfast Follow yeah, nearly half a decade after it happened

💄 october-november Follow well was she just supposed to tell her as soon as it happened? june was like 8 or 9 at the time

👠 pinkbitchnamedbreakfast Follow i'm just saying it's fucked up of her

🌺 ithinkihauvejaundice Follow june and dys did nothing wrong. "what about the murders" god forbid a couple middle school girls have some sleepover fun. those people deserved it anyway

⛅️ evil-wifeguy-lesbian Follow june july was the realest bitch out there because if MY girlfriend needed someone dead i would do it in an instant

☀️ peacenloveonplanetsapphic Follow i don't want you to murder people for me dearest we've been over this i don't need anyone dead

🍂 littlejester Follow

🌎 thefuckingwizard Follow "february march gaslight gatekeep girlboss" this and that. wheres my february cringefailgirl truthers

🕷 thirdsilliestvriskakinnie Follow i think that if i lost a bad bitch to an arranged marriage i would do what dinah did too

🕷 thirdsilliestvriskakinnie Follow i think i hauve a mental illness

🐬 celerytheworld Follow was it casual when you promised we were going to get married as kids, were my first kiss, told me you'd be in love with me and marry me and take me on dates if one of us was the opposite gender, told me you'd love me more than your husband if we ever got married, told me you'd rather hang out with me then get married to a man, told me i'd look beautiful in a wedding dress, and then killed yourself?

🧑 normal-guy Follow op are you ok

🐬 celerytheworld Follow

🩸 murderenjoyer Follow inherent homoeroticism of killing someone together

👻 yaoifreak Follow pascal may x mr thorgett. old man yaoi anyone

🧢 whitemormonwasted Follow when i said pascal may did 9/11 this isnt what i meant

🕷 thirdsilliestvriskakinnie Follow june july is a vriska

🧣 februarymarches Follow christly shippers dont fucking interact with me! for obvious reasons! theres a four year gap there!

🌎 thefuckingwizard Follow i dont ship them but like...op how many years do you think are in between 15 and 17?

🧣 februarymarches Follow it's an eighth grader and a senior yall disgust me. four year age gap. proshitters dni is already in my bio, stop shipping a literal child with a high school senior

🕷 thirdsilliestvriskakinnie Follow 15 is not a "literal child" op

🧣 februarymarches Follow >14 in bio

⭐️ stars-discourse-sideblog Follow you're both wrong it's three years

🔥 sometimesthorgett Follow 9/11 MENTIONED

👻 yaoifreak Follow christly are both straight men anyway. if u want yaoi try pascal x thorgett

🧢 whitemormonwasted Follow those are two different characters + pascal had a wife

👻 yaoifreak Follow https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bisexuality

🕷 thirdsilliestvriskakinnie Follow 2001 and 1999 were two years apart i don't think they taught anyone on this site to read

👻 yaoifreak Follow READ?

🪼 dysapppointment Follow just saw june july's ilb design and holy shit not to be a lesbian but

🍋 thosedamnlemonstealingwhores Follow username checks out

🎱 tragedyenjoyer Follow ogigugh calendar siblings december sisters badmann siblings shiz siblings collins siblings what if i Died

🧣 februarymarches Follow just so you guys know op is a dacarol shipper. don't reblog from them.

🎱 tragedyenjoyer Follow i have bad news about the creators of the thing you're a fan of

🍂 littlejester Follow trudy cryme more like tru-deez nuts gottem

🛍️ poetrynjoyer Follow mayverse is so interesting bc you have beautiful heartfelt writing about love and loss and hope and family and friendship and romance and tragedy and loving despite with such complex women and you also have shit like "monk clickbaiter fraggot" and "9/11 porn games on steam" and whatevers going on at jms

🧲 whysoyurious Follow MAYVERSE HIT 100K F/F FICS ON AO3 WHO CHEERED

🎀 apricotmayonaise Follow making a list of who could and couldntve possibly done 9/11 in the mayverse, is doing 9/11 a sin in dana's cult?

🐝 incoherentbee Follow

YES?!??!?!?!?

[1eos]

Sorry but I feel crazy for feeling :/ about how now people are going "make noise about this! Spread the word about what is happening! Make it know that this is bad!" About this like where was this energy for black folk 😭 feels so complicated like yes its fucked up but also am i crazy for feeling mad about how people ignore shit when it happens to black people but suddenly when it happens to white people then the whole site shouts about it? 😭 sucks because you can't even complain about it because YOU KNOW you will get people calling you names for it 😭 sorry I feel more complex feelings and sorry I feel more annoyed than anything 😭 I am one of the bad ones if I said "it sucks that everyone is ignoring the racism because this is happening to a white trans person" I would still be in the wrong to them and they'll point at me and call psyop 😭😭😭😭😭

youre not bad and you're not crazy either. cuz in the end of the day nothing's gonna get done if you won't listen to black ppl 🤷🏾‍♀️ as they say you're only as strong as your weakest link if you have someone in your community that is free to be attacked at will you're giving an in for everyone to be attacked. someone already made a post comparing the two situations but its similar to sex workers raising the alarm about how websites were trying to censor them and how it would only get worse if ppl allowed it and ppl really fell for the 'protecting kids' rhetoric and now here we are with that crazy kosa censorship bill. when ppl just straight up ignored that staff has the ability to moderate and go scorched earth but only want to do it against ppl they don't like and those ppl seemingly being anyone black :) that SHOULDVE been when non blacks woke tf up and started pushing back bc if u allow it to happen to one group of ppl its def gonna keep happening

and you, and anyone else who feels some time of way abt this, aren't in the wrong for feeling that way! its actually annoying as hell 😭😭😭 its like someone handing you the answers to a test but you still fucking fail bc you don't respect the ppl who gave it to you. and we all obvs feel bad for the ppl getting deleted and when it comes to the ppl actually being deleted they really aren't the problem. its the ppl on tumblr who rally around them saying stupid shit like 'this has never been done before' yes it has and im willing to bet YOU were reblogging those posts calling black ppl russian psyops for having an opinion thats beyond blue good red bad! and this lack of respect for people who will always be one of the first to face repercussion is why we can't get shit done bc after tumblr banned black ppl and erased the ferguson and blm tags nonblacks turned around and were encouraging folks to give this bigoted ass website money bc you have to 'support your favorite hellsite' girl what......

[nicollekidman]

Hi Abby, I am uncomfortable saying this off anon for a variety of reasons, please do not think one of them is cowardice. I have followed you for years and years. I’ve come to love so much media because of you and always appreciate your takes. I have chosen to unfollow you now. I am a Jewish person who has been so scared and upset about what the state of Israel is doing to Palestinians and am disgusted by the war crimes committed by Israel. At the same time, I have numerous Israeli friends and family members who have been murdered by Hamas in the last few weeks. Civilians visiting for educational and cultural exchange programs, horrifically killed. Your recently reblogged informational post about how Hamas is not a terrorist organization was deeply upsetting. This may not matter at all to you, but I ask that you consider empathy to all people involved in this issue. Decolonization is important. My friends and family are dead. These two facts can coexist. Just wanted to share this with you because I know many people see your blog and are affected by the information you share.

probably shouldn’t answer this at 1am and you’ve already unfollowed so you probably won’t even see this but i just want to ask you why my sharing resources and information about the reality of hamas and it’s current functioning within gaza / its original charter immediately made you think that i don’t care about loss of human life. there was not a single phrase in that post that minimized victims of the october attack, in fact, not a single phrase in that post took a stance on anything, it was purely informational. frankly, i think it was so measured to dissuade from reactions exactly like this, and if i had written it myself, i would’ve done a worse job.

and if you had been able to push past your knee jerk reaction to reading “they are not a terrorist organization” you would recognize that clarifying language and correcting misconceptions is one of the most important things we can do, both going forward in ending this genocide and looking back on how and why lives have been lost in both israel and palestine.

i have personal empathy and grief for your situation, and i’m so sorry you have suffered loss amongst your community and loved ones. but your loss does not form a shield behind which you are allowed to hide from truth, or force other people to close their mouths when trying to educate themselves and others. we are currently witnessing ongoing mass death, us-backed genocide, and a hugely successful (in the west) propaganda campaign to make this endeavor as Unknowable as possible, especially to those who have never looked into the reality of life in the region. grounding ourselves in recent history, learning more about words and labels that are thrown around weekly, daily, hourly, SPECIFICALLY to justify and excuse the ongoing campaign of death israel has visited upon the palestinian people for decades…. that is the LEAST we are all responsible for. it is your duty, as someone who has lost friends and loved ones, and it is mine, as someone with eyes on their stupid blog, to make every concerted effort to understand and spread the truth, in context, to enrich our own activism and honor the dead.

saying “decolonization is important” while unfollowing me after years bc i shared information about what hamas is, is so empty and meaningless you might as well have not said it at all. thousands of people are actively and endlessly being murdered behind a smokescreen of Terrorism with the VERY SPECIFIC connotations that holds over the west and the US in particular… attempting to relay information that complicates and clarifies your exact knee jerk reaction is the entire point. i hope one day you are able to look a little closer and recognize that your personal hurt in seeing new information that makes you uncomfortable is not important in the scheme of what we are currently trying to prevent

[yesloulou]

ALEXIS, I just reblogged your ask about how checo has been flopping since ausgp and your whole point of the narrative remind me of something I’ve been trying to put into words for so long and I think I’ve finally GOT IT:

As much as racing bros don’t want to admit it, F1 isn’t just about racing. It’s theatre and spectacle like literally ALL FORMS of entertainment is. And there always has to be a story. Look at how a large section of F1 fans have termed this season as “boring”. Even during the merc domination years, there was a clear story: Lewis going after record after record (“how high can he climb” type narrative) and he had the nico rivalry to bolster his title reigns. Seb also had a very clear narrative for his return to the title scene.

Max, as much as I love him, doesn’t really have a “story” per say and checo is NOT anywhere close to providing him with one. But who has a better story this season than Daniel Ricciardo? The whole Icarus falling, prodigal son returning, tireless underdog storyline is ALL RIGHT THERE. And that’s why he’s been generating the most headlines all season, even before he got into the AT seat.

While we’re on the subject, who has a better story WITH MAX expect Daniel Ricciardo? His favorite teammate, the only one to beat him in equal machinery, the one who’s clawed his way back to the top after so much struggle while Max has had so much success? Just imagine how much more Max’s third title would mean if it came down to him and Danny in that last race, than him and Checo…who he’s already dominated all season 🙄 It’s actually a disservice to Max more than anything that he doesn’t have a real “battle” like he did with Lewis and Charles the last two years.

But they have Danny there as their ace they can pull out and suddenly EVERYONE is invested in seeing them go at it, even if its only one more time. In short, this is my essay that I’ll be second to RB headquarters as to why they need to switch Danny over in Vegas 👼

What you said!!!

(Btw saying max's season doesn't have a story is not a dig at all imo. He has no story because him and the new reg rb cars have been unchallenged. It really just speaks for how good he is as a driver and rb has been as a team.)

I really enjoy looking at the juxtaposition of how F1 exists because of the athletic spirit of pushing human performance to the extreme but at the same time is a media/entertainment event at its core. Especially in the context of Daniel's career, since he is a bit of an outlier in terms of career trajectory vs marketability (and is therefore more telling of how F1 functions as an ecosystem).

It's really no secret that F1 doesn't thrive under single team dominance. The more competitive the field is, the more interest there will be for the races and ultimately for the sport (source: domenicali himself). People's interest then translates directly into F1's livelihood bc F1 as an organization profits primarily through selling broadcasting rights and ad opportunities. Now that RBR has built themselves a gap even bigger than F1 had expected (source also domenicali) with no signs of slowing down or as you pointed out, alternative marketing angles/entry points like the lewis/nico situation, this season has begun to bore, which will hurt F1 financially, if not already.

On the other hand, it's against sportsmanship for F1 to do anything that can be considered manipulation to change this reality (it was explicitly stated that F1 "cannot intervene" RB's dominance). Domenicali's best bet (and what F1 has been doing so far) is to exercise budget caps in hopes of a convergence over time and a shortening of RB's cycle of dominance, with 'hope' being the keyword since there are way too many factors for anybody to really predict how this RB era will ultimately play out. While the hoping and waiting continue, F1 is in need of other ways to keep their seasons interesting. And you're absolutely right about this being where Daniel's marketability (existing and potential) comes into play. On top of the fact that people are simply massively interested in him in or out of a car, front or back at the field**, he also has the potential ability to make the championship itself interesting again, something Ferarri, Merc, Checo (and Domenicali himself for the time being) have all failed to do. As marketing-minded as F1's management is (remember when Domenicali literally flew to nyc for red bull's 2023 car launch with horner but then decided last minute to not attend in order to give Ford the full spotlight?), I wouldn't be surprised at all if they welcome Daniel's comeback as much as his fans, or maybe even more so due to its financial implications.

This is ofc not to say F1 can or will do anything about it (just like on principle they can't intervene RB's dominance). But if you think about it, at this point, everyone -- fans, media, sponsors, suppliers (the amount of ford/daniel content we've seen so far), Red Bull as a team, F1 as an organization, even (or like, especially) Max himself -- all want to see and benefit from Daniel coming back on top (except for maybe Checo but at the rate he's been going lately i actually don't know anymore lol). This is a momentum whose importance should not be underestimated. This is exactly why, even though Daniel's stock was at an all time low after mclaren, he was given opportunities and tool sets to rebuild and reestablish himself in this otherwise extremely exclusive, brutal in nature sport. Red Bull (and Mercedes at one point) does not do this out of charity or nostalgia. They're simply an acting agent for this momentum.

Anyways, this is why I think Daniel's F1 career is far from over. People who are quick to conclude "without a wdc ricciardo can't just come and go like alonso" fail to recognize that even not racing, Daniel generates more public interest than the majority of the grid**, an interest that ultimately ties back to this sport, which puts him in a very unique position.

** According to google, Daniel created thee biggest headline F1 has had in the past 3 months, with his overall google search volume ranking 3rd amongst all drivers despite not actively racing.

[zipperrants]

ZIPPER ITS VIVIAN HERE

i would ask literally anyone else but i feel pretty comfortable w you already cuz we just reblog and talk about a lotta shit so yk

okay so basically i have no idea whats going on bc all my attempts to shift get me REALLY close but i just can't seem to get there and it feels like im missing something?? i know that TECHNICALLY I'm not missing anything but i can't get that in my head and idk everytime i try i get to a similar stage, like SOOO CLOSE but i still wake up here

idk what to do, basically

sorry its just that you're one of the few people i know more or less personally who have shifted so yeah

thanks <33 (@vivian-shiftss)

First Hi vivi second sorry i thought i answered this but aparently I didn't so what I think is maybe youre possibly getting into your head a little? When I shifted i was getting really close and then wouldn't be able to get there because I was scared and excited so id talk myself out of shifting without realizing it. I think the best way for me personally idk if it will work for you but for me what worked was deciding "okay even if it is just a mini shift it is still a shift and we can work from there. i know this may not help but i am tired and i have to be up early tomorrow but I will try to be better at answering asks (no promises though)

[munsonsduchess]

Radar Love

summary: when you have some car trouble you run into the hottest mechanic in hawkins w/c: 1,653 warnings: pet name (princess) a/n: i'm sure i'm not alone in my thirst for car mechanic eddie, i also know nothing about cars so i mostly just pulled all of this out of thin air, well i did see a video about the main issue but the rest is just me making whatever i want up bc i can

if you like this please reblog, leave a comment. even just a keysmash it really helps me out.

(moodboard by me)

It had been your idea to move back home. You’d left after high school and gone to college just how you were supposed to, but it just hadn’t been working out. 

When the earthquakes happened it seemed like the right time to leave. To go home. Figure out what you actually wanted to do. 

So you told your faculty advisor, your tutors, everyone that you needed some time to go back home and help your parents pick up the pieces. As it turned out you weren't the only one who'd thought the same, you'd run into more old friends and classmates around Hawkins now than you'd ever done before. People who had stayed, people who had left and come back for one reason or another. 

It almost felt like Hawkins had some sort of gravitational pull that no matter where you went or what you did Hawkins would always pull you back into its orbit. Like there was something, not natural, going on. It wouldn't be the first time people brought up the strange happenings in town and attributed it to something unnatural. Though people like that were usually seen as nothing more than crackpots and conspiracy theorists, like that guy Murray your dad had told you about who lived outside of town. 

➽───────────────❥

It was strange being back in Hawkins but also as if you'd never left, you'd expected things to have changed somewhat in the year since you'd been gone but apart from some more stores that had closed downtown apparently threatened by the new mall being built outside of town, new since the company that had owned Starcourt went out of business after the fire (something about asbestos was the rumour) but all the money had since been diverted to “help Hawkins heal”, which seemed to be the bullshir campaign the mayor was running on to try and get re elected. According to your dad however, it wasn’t gonna work.

You'd been lost in thought and almost didn't see the boy who ran out into the street in front of your car, you just about had time to slam on the brakes before you added to the Hawkins Death Toll. What was strange however was that instead of coming to a dead stop your car seemed to want to go left towards the curb.

You could see the boy's mother coming out into the street and chastising her son, obviously she'd turned her back for two seconds and the boy had just forgotten all about basic road safety,

"I am so sorry about him, is your car ok? Did you hit the curb?" the woman asked, "Johnny! Apologise to the lady, you probably scared her half to death!" 

Johnny didn't seem to understand what he'd done wrong and was instead gawking at his mother with large wet tears forming in his eyes, 

"I'm ok, the car probably just needs to go to the shop. It's due for a check up" you told the woman, you had no desire to stick around and wait for Johnny to start crying and screaming. So you bid the woman goodbye and headed off home again. Your car was already full of groceries and you didn't want anything to spoil.

After unloading the car and the groceries you told your Dad about what had happened, 

"That's definitely not good, you really should get that checked out. I'll take a look"

"No you will not" your mum warned, brandishing a spatula as a weapon, "you aren't a mechanic and you don't know half as much about cars as you think you do" 

"I was just gonna take a look" 

"Take it to Randy's on Elm, they'll take a look at it for you" your mum brandished her spatula at your dad again, "if you want something to do then I've got a hundred jobs you could be doing" 

You took your mother's advice and left the house again. Watching as your dad slumped back towards the house, he was a man with a lot of opinions. It was true but those opinions didn't always equate to professional knowledge. 

➽───────────────❥

You made it to Randy's without incident and pulled your car up into the forecourt, you couldn't see anyone around and thinking maybe they were in the back or on lunch you headed into the office. The door made a ringing noise as you opened it and you could hear someone calling out from behind the counter, 

"Be with ya in just a sec" the male voice called, the voice sounded vaguely familiar and so you wondered if perhaps another old friend was working behind the counter these days. 

When a curly headed man popped up from behind the counter you had to dig your keys into the palm of your hand, Eddie Munson looked different than you remembered but he still had the same effect. He had scars on his face and what looked like a ligature mark around his neck, you remembered hearing about the escaped Serial Killer Henry Creel and what he'd done to the kids who'd been his victims and to Eddie but you hadn't expected Eddie to still be in Hawkins, 

"How can I help you Princess?" he asked with a slow grin, "having car trouble?" 

You swallowed hard and relayed your troubles to Eddie and that you'd been told to come here specifically to get the car checked out,

"Um I don't know what's wrong but I guess it's my brakes?" you said shifting awkwardly from one foot to the other, "i don't know anything about cars" 

"Well don't you worry Princess that's what we're here for. Why don't you leave the car with me for a couple hours and I'll see what I can do" 

You nodded and moved towards the counter to fill in the paperwork Eddie placed on top and handed him your keys. He laughed at the little keychains you'd attached to the main keyring and you felt all the blood rush to your face, 

"Um, should I wait here or?" 

"It'll take me a little while and I wouldn't want you waiting around for me" Eddie told you, "why don't you go home and i'll call you when we're all set" 

You nodded and left the office. How you were going to get home was another question entirely but right now you needed someone to vent your feelings to.

➽───────────────❥

Twenty minutes later you were sitting in Benny's with your best friend Maria and relaying the whole interaction to her,

"He looks even better than he did in school Maria, how is that fair?" 

Maria who'd known all about your crush on Eddie in High School and had listened to you talk about him for hours just laughed,

"Girl you were in college, didn't you find any nice college boys to get over this crush?" 

"I thought I did but … ugh" you hit your head lightly off the table, "he was wearing coveralls and he had his hair up, I'm only human!" 

Maria just shook her head at you and stole another one of your fries. She knew there was nothing she could say or do in this situation, you just needed to get it out,

"Would it be entirely unethical to just ruin my car if it means he'll be the one fixing it?" you asked from your spot on the table, "like I'm sure I could find something in the library that would tell me which parts i could pull out to make it still run but need looking over" 

Maria opened her mouth but then cut herself off with a grin, she had spotted a familiar mass of curly hair not too far away from where you were currently lamenting,

"I think maybe that's a little extreme babe" she said, "eat your burger, we'll go get your car when we're done. I'll be your emotional support" 

➽───────────────❥

Maria was true to her word and she drove both of you back to Randy's to pick up your car, or at least to see if it was ready, 

"Well well what have we got here. Miss me that much Princess?" Eddie's voice rang out across the forecourt as he came into view again. His coveralls were tied at his waist and there was what you assumed to be engine oil on his white t-shirt, arms and a smear across his face. You could tell he'd built some more muscle since high school, probably from working in the Garage and his arms were much more toned than you remembered, 

"Is the car ready?" Maria asked, since apparently you had lost the ability to speak,

"Yeah she's ready to go. Why don't you come in the office with me Princess and we'll get this all squared away?" 

You nodded dumbly and followed Eddie into the office, he jumped the counter and fumbled around looking for the right paperwork. You could see Maria outside giving you an encouraging smile and thumbs up, 

"Um, what do I owe you?" you finally found your voice as Eddie turned back around, you'd brought your Dad's credit card with you knowing you wouldn't have enough to pay for this outright,

"How about we call it $150 and a date?" Eddie grinned at you again, "and you promise you won't ruin the poor car just to see little old me?" 

"Oh my god you heard that?" you wanted nothing more but the ground to open up and swallow you whole, "i'm so sorry" 

"What's to be sorry about?" Eddie laughed, "it just gave me the little push the guys said I needed to ask you out. So what do you say?" 

"Absolutely. Yes" 

Eddie made a little fist pumping motion and you couldn't help but laugh. Turns out you wouldn't need to ruin your car for a date with the hot mechanic after all. 

Maybe coming back to Hawkins was the best thing you'd ever done. 

Taglist: @pillow-titties @munsonology @thegirlblogstuff @boomhauer @prettyboyeddiemunson @hellfireeddie6 @that-lame-ghoul9000 @flashyourgreeneyesatme @anxiousstark @ruinedbythehobbit @winnifredburkleismyhero @manda-panda-monium @insertcoolnameherethanks @aftermidnightwriting

[icallhimjoey]

I was wondering about what your feelings are on the discourse about likes vs reblogs for fics? You never really comment on how well your fics do, but you must run into the hardships of having something not do as well as you hoped it would like any other fic writer right? You also don't really reblog other writer's work. If you dont want to answer dont even worry about it, I really love your writing! 💕

oof

okay, i might... so, this might come off different to how i mean it. i want to preface this by saying that everyone is completely entitled to all of their feelings, all is valid, and all is fine

but i dont really care if you reblog my shit or not?

its so lovely if you do, and its so nice if you leave a comment, but a like? it means just as much to me. you pressing that little heart button "doesnt do anything" when talking about the way tumblr works, BUT, it does do something to me

its nice

i like it

makes me go :)

reblog if you want, like if you want, leave a comment if you want - all are equally lovely to me, dont feel pressured to reblog my things onto your blog if you dont want them there

i understand

because i dont want (many) reblogs on my blog either

i very seldom, if im like insanely into a fic, do reblog fics of others, but you're right, i used to do it more often than i do now

its bc im reading less on here and more over on ao3 + i want people to be able to scroll down my blog and find my content (its why i go in and delete so much random shit i post too, if i think something doesnt need to be there, has been there long enough for people to see, i'll easily get rid of it)

im also not reading any joe fics, at all. its just eddie, steve and steddie over here in this corner when it comes to reading. i only like my own way of writing joe, so... there's also that.

but i ALSO really understand that people really do want and push for people to reblog their writing, the feedback is really validating and motivates you to keep going

it's just that i feel weird enough about writing rpf as it is, i dont actually want that large of an audience (it's already too large, too many followers) (but the notes on fics dont mirror that so its ok)

[secrettastemakerland]

Answering "Reblog this and let people send you asks (anonymously or not) about how they would describe your fics, your writing style or just anything they've thought about when reading your work" !! HIII okay so I've only read one of your fics so far and it was a short one so I might not be the best person to answer this but I'm so glad you reblogged that post bc I actually do remember getting specific thoughts & feelings when reading one of yours!! I'm not sure if your writing is always like this but in that fic (the one I commented on!!) it felt,,, cozy. it felt warm and familiar and the writing had life to it. it wasn't just Character A walking over to Character B's house (and then room). no, there were explanations, actions, emotions, thoughts and even little bits of humour in between. and that really added to the writing!!!! the story also flowed amazingly!! it was a short fic but it didn't even feel rushed!! everything just felt natural. it was all cohesive from one paragraph to the next and I adore that!! and the descriptions were wonderful!!! painted an image in my mind very easily. one I can only describe the image as love. if the fic was an artwork, it'd have a soft grainy/noisy textured layer over it and the colour palette would be of warm pinks and oranges -- and not just bc I was getting 'sun beginning to set' vibes from it, but also bc of how soft & tender the hurt/comfort in the fic was. also, I remember opening it, reading the first 1 or 2 paragraphs and then getting so genuinely excited bc by then I could already tell you could write well LMAO -- and I was right!! you CAN write well!!! like just in general too!! idk how exactly to explain this but basically what I mean is that you're good at coming up with unique sentences and not super straight-forward plain ones!! but anyways ya!! also, sorry for writing so much!!! I didn't realise I had so much to say 😭😭 (^ /gen to all of the above 💗) - 💎

okay so.

I've been hoarding this for like 2 weeks now and at first I had like the typical kicking my feet, twirling my hair, gotta kiss anon on the mouth (platonically duh) kinda reaction. I was ready to search all of tumblr for the epic poet in my askbox. UNTIL I GOT TO THE END!

I read the end (lol i saw the emoji) and felt magically, red string-a-lly compelled to write a simonette fic. For some strange reason.

So here she is: a slightly longer simonette secret flavored fic!

Jeanette sneezed, readjusted her glasses, and then sneezed again. She wiped her nose miserably before she let out a trio of more sneezes.

Honestly, if the shelves didn't need dusting, she would have stopped. But, alas, Brittany had begged and pleaded with her to do her chores this week in order for her to go on a date.

("And I triple, no, quadruple! promise I won't ask you if we're soulmates this time, Jean!"

"You're not supposed to be asking her that anyway," Eleanor scoffed from the other side of their bedroom.

Brittany stuck her tongue out at her before she returned to her begging and pleading. "Oh, pretty please, Jeanette!")

So Jeanette had agreed, if only to be spared from Brittany's puppy dog pout and crocodile tears combo. That and her obvious hopeless romantic tendencies aside (Brittany's soulmate was a street musician around the corner and, although she wouldn't tell her, she hoped that this date might somehow led her to her soulmate), she really did enjoy working at the shop.

Planting new flowers, experimenting with new potion combinations, organizing, and then reorganizing new spell books, Jeanette loved all of it.

Jeanette pouted as she watched her hat fall to the ground after another round of sneezes. Okay, maybe she didn't love every job at the shop. The heavens above knew that she wasn't exactly helpful during a lunch rush.

Her hand waved the duster with an excited flourish, more than ready to be rid of the dust and its cruel attacks to her nose. Unfortunately, that only made the dust to throw itself back towards her, causing her not only to sneeze once again, but also caused her to sneeze herself right off the ladder, towards the ground.

She let out a breath of relief as she bounced on the summoned daisy bed, catching her fall, returning the smile her little sister was giving her.

Read on ao3

[the-travelling-witch]

Hello! I'm sending this to my favorite writers to enable you to brag about your own writings! (But don't feel pressured to reply and take your time!) :D

Pick one fic you wrote and would recommend to us readers for each of these genres:

Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/No Comfort, AU (any AUs!), Selfship (If you selfship!), [Insert a genre you've written but is not in the list].

Have fun, and just a reminder to always be proud of what you created!! You're amazing!! We love you!!! 💗

Extra // Feel free to ramble on why the fic is your favorite, whatever thinking process you have when you wrote it, which part(s) are your favorite, etc!!

ahhhh this is such a cool ask to get, thank you so much!! also your favourite writers? and that includes me of all people??? don’t mind me, someone might be cutting onions in here 🥺🩵

i hope you don’t mind me rambling, i might have gotten a little carried away ^^; (i’ve also not really heeded the one per genre rule, i’m just bad at picking one or the other hshsh)

Fluff

one of each huh? i think we’re already running into a problem on the fluff genre, i don’t really have anything to recommend, i’m afraid; none of them really stand out to me personally (that aren’t aus or so), so i’d much rather talk more about my other works

Hurt / Angst

now to hop into the categories i really like talking about, hurt and angst!! :D out of anything comfort related, i think i like my period comfort scenarios for both obey me and twst. i wrote them to alleviate my own pains in a way, but it’s great to see other people getting comfort from them as well (also to all my folks who told me you felt included by the gn reader instead of a fem reader, i see you and i love you)

with the mushy gushy stuff out of the way, let’s dive into my absolute favourite genre to write ever, angst (no comfort hehe ^^); here’s the problem to not list too many fics but i’ll use my spare from not naming a fluff fic :]

long-time ramble and tag readers will know what to expect; what could’ve been is the first angst fic i really got into and could’ve easily been a series if i had thought about it at the time. while looking back on it, sure there are things i could’ve done better, but it still has a soft spot in my heart and despite the low notes, it’s the fic i got the best feedback on ever (those asks, comments and reblogs are so precious to me, you have no idea)

similarly a million miles away and the loneliest (same premise, different characters) are some of my favourites too. overall, in its entirety, i prefer the former, i think most parts in there came out very well. however, if i had to pick one part out of all eight that i would recommend, it’s xiao’s part from the loneliest, it didn’t gather as much attention as part 1 but my friends left so many amazing comments in my document and i myself love how it came out, which makes it so special to me

Selfships + OCs

while i do selfship, i hardly ever write about it on here (or much in general outside some hcs i pester some moots with); for one, i find it hard to write about, my thoughts seem to leave me the second i try to type them out. i also don’t think many people are interested in the topic anyway and i hate feeling like i’m shouting into a void (i’m trying to keep a lid on how much i babble on dash anyhow, with varying amounts of success ^^;)

i thought i read ocs on the list, so i’ll include them, as well, especially since i have a little more to say than about selfships, considering i post about some of them every now and then. dantalion and his story part have a special place in my heart, not only because he was the first oc i introduced, but also bc his part resonates with me most, i think. while not seen much of yet, i also took a liking to my twst oc cheron, i think he’s fun!! (ofc i like my other obey me ocs too but these two are ranked a little higher hshshs)

AUs

this one… might be obvious. i think we can all see the modern au coming from a mile away (perhaps even from a million miles away haha). it’s kind of the only au i have really going on but, even so, there’s a reason my inbox fills up the second i mention it. though, when i wrote that piercer! xiao fic all that time ago, the au wasn’t even a thing in my mind yet, funny how that works. it’s currently on a bit of a hiatus but it’s certainly not dead ^^;

more excitingly however, and as a treat for the people who’ve read this far into me rambling about my own writing, the aus in my drafts!! i want to work on all of them (and then work on none of them)

the oldest of the three i’m thinking about is my haikyuu isekai au. i’m 10k into the draft (plus like 2k notes) and i still think the premise and plot is super fun (i was thinking/hoping it would end up somewhere between 20k and 25k) buuut the problem is i’m currently stuck on one scene that’s just not turning out fun at all, so i’ve been neglecting it ever since ^^;

second on the list of aus that occupy my mind is my twst pokemon au!! this one is more recent but i’ve been enjoying doing world building for it + the people i’ve let read over my first draft of a intro seem to have liked it too!! i’ll have to give more intense and focused thought to brainstorming the story we’d be follow, but i get excited every time i think about it hehe

and lastly, the most recent thing i worked on, an au for barbarian bakugo and… well i won’t say anything on the identity of the reader yet. it is a little enemies to lovers and i have already planned out part 2 in my head despite not even remotely finishing part 1. it doesn’t help that the book i’m reading rn evolves the same themes and makes me think about it every time i look at it or pick it back up :]

(there’s also an au i might want to write for mermay but idk if i can finish it in time + the bakugo au weighs heavy on my mind rn hshsh)

as a last point, i’m also keeping in mind that i had an event planned!! i haven’t finalised it yet and haven’t given much thought to my own entries but maybe i can get there some day (perhaps towards the end of the year?) ^^

anyway, thank you so much for indulging me and prompting me to talk about my writing, as you can probably tell, i love doing that haha and thank you again for the kind words, it really means the world to me <3

if you have any questions or thoughts on any of these, feel free to ask me!! i’d be happy to talk about any of this :> (though i can’t promise fast replies…)

[yunwooz]

Hi, I found the clip of woozi mentioning mia where he admits he saw it (no comment regarding its content) but recommended a different anime https://twitter.com/jieunkai/status/1726405790255202622?t=ycDZDIvxOnmEm0TZ16dIsQ&s=19 and apparently this whole thing on txt side at least is mainly used as a hate bandwagon and can be deceptively portrayed (like the lack of censorship or purposely edited videos) https://twitter.com/blue_summer814/status/1726460876637741405?t=kubr8CQR1BQz4aPGHxC7lg&s=19

I personally don't really know how to feel abt this, bc I also consume a ton of animal animanga content, do enjoy some of the more gorey series, but I wasn't aware that such an acclaimed title was in fact questionable to this extent. I do think that it's probably safe to say that their opinions are based on the r15 version since it was even televised and seems to be deemed by the general public as the only version. I wouldn't be surprised if they watched it bc it is popular and didn't dive deeper into it, but then its a rather unfortune case of ignorance. Just to be clear, I'm not trying to defend or go easy on them just bc I like most of those idols; it's just that I think there are more aspects to consider rather than throwing around such serious accusations (which Im not saying youre doing, its abiut naming them p*dos). Also, think it would be nice if you included at least the abbreviation of the anime title in the bullet point list post bc at first I was really confused. Thanks for the research!

link 1, link 2

thank you for the further context about woozi, i am not really at all deep into the svt fandom or anything so i didn't know where all to look to find information on it! i do think people are bringing things up for the wrong reasons, and there was a lot of misinformation spread perhaps done intentionally i truly don't know, and truly there is a limit to what we know about the censored version of the show in sk. if it was broadcast on tv, i would like to believe that it could not be broadcast with any sort of gross or harmful undertones to it, but i also just don't know to that extent.

what i personally think is important now and moving forward is that people become aware of what is questionable and wrong about the series both in anime and manga. the argument of "well he didn't recommend it really!" is getting a bit tired because that isn't the core of the issue and not what the focus should be. anime fans and manga fans are already shitting bricks over this saying it's ridiculous that kpop stans find the content of the show and manga concerning, which can't be helped and their opinions likely won't ever be changed if they're defending it so staunchly. in the case of ignorance, we can only hope that talking about concerns will be heard and understood. i added the title and abbreviation of the anime title in the tags of the original bullet point list, since so many versions of it have been reblogged and since i reblogged it to add onto it, any changes made to the post won't show in those reblogged versions ><

[majimemegoro]

i listened to too much synthwave while doing my horrible tasks today so it got me thinking about my yakuza cyberpunk au concept which i dont think ive ever posted about

(yes the jacket is full-length/down to the ankles, i just had to cut off the picture bc this drawing is from 2019 and the proportions are WACK)

so basically majima has cybernetic implants shimano wanted him to get for both his eye and also all the areas where his tattoo covers. i havent fully fleshed out the ideas but obviously the eye thing can enable him to zoom in and see infrared or whatever. also I think that the back piece maybe has like 2 “snakes”/metal tentacle things that can come OUT of it as though the snakes from his tattoo were coming alive. (but theyre robot parts. idk if im im explaining any sense im so tired)

so the implants are really heavy duty impressive ones, maybe even experimental, so his body is always rejecting them which is why the places where its attached to his human flesh look hideously irritated and infected. maybe you can see that better in this pic a little idk.

also he has a cybernetic Bat which is just a regular Bat but it has some blinking lights on it for the AestheticTM. (just kidding it probably doubles as a tazer or something idk)

goda ryuji is obviously just how he is in dead souls haha.

and the new ideas i had today were that kadokura is a cybernetics developed/manufacturer (Rachi Future Solutions or something lollll), and when he recruits sato into becoming a Cyber Hitman (what is a hitman called in a cyberpunk world.. idk) sato doesnt get a gun arm or anything but he does get some modifications done to improve his already-supernatural bodily steadiness, probably at least one cybernetic eye etc., and he DOES get a chip put in his brain that can relay him information and stuff but also (unbenoknwst to sato) allows kadokura to monitor him at all times, see through his eyes etc., and even to manipulate and shut down certain emotions ! *FROZEN ROAR SPOILERS* so in this au sato is more of a victim, he ilterally couldnt feel remorse for his crimes, remorse was turned off !!!!!

but then when he goes to abashiri the chip is Out Of Range or Not Getting Reception or something! so when sato  meets ok*dera (who is Of Course does a bit of a mechanic on the side and can do really rough and ready cybernetics stuff—nothing like the sleek Rachi Future Solutions tech, its clunky and made up of old parts and so on but it gets the job done) suddenly satos brain starts to heal a little and oh no why doesnt he want to complete his mission ????

and probably at the end of the story okduera like gives sato a chip he had in HIS brain so even the Japan Central Computer or whatever the inevitably fascist surveillance state government has would read sato as ok*dera. (though how this helps given that ok*dera is wanted dead by the mob is an open question, as it is in canon..)

also i think that instead of having the mountain village vs city be like “this village people DONT have cybernetics, theyre ACTUALLY human” its more about tech sovereignty! like the mountain village is better because the cybernetics they use are homegrown and repairable and powered by their own code, not run by giant evil corporations who control them from afar and block out every good memory youve ever had or whatever

also yama-oroshi is obviously a giant mecha bear

anyway if you read this reblog and add ideas for other characters that people actually care about like kiryu and nishiki

[thesalemwitchtries]

update & little vent

I don't know when the next chapter of DOAG will be out, I have my grandparents visiting for the first half of the summer, and I'm not really feeling very excited about writing after seeing how much engagement has fallen when it already wasn't very high to begin with. I know that's on me for not being consistent, and I will have something out because I like this story and I have so much fun sharing it with the people that do seem to enjoy it, I'm just struggling to get over... ig feeling rejected, somehow? The lack of notes isn't really a problem for me, there's just been a lot of ppl (not really, like 10 in the past week, but that's a lot for what I have going on) who're liking my posts and then almost immediately unliking them, it's just disheartening to get excited about a like, only to open tumblr and see its gone already. It feels embarrassing, like they don't even want me to know they saw my post.

Anyways, I hope this doesn't come off as like ungrateful/whiny or anything, bc I understand people get busy or sometimes a story doesn't go the way you expected in the beginning, and I truly adore all the new and regular readers that I do have, I'm just trying to explain how I'm feeling right now. All that to say that I won't be upset if you don't reblog or leave a long comment, I know that it can be difficult if you're shy or new or on your phone, but I at least would like to know that people are reading what I'm writing, yk?

In the meantime, I'm keeping busy with work and making a lot of art, and I'm working on a Foggy oneshot that I think is pretty cute, I just can't really prioritize my Matt story rn bc I do feel bad about how little reception its gotten. Idk, hopefully I'll get over it and feel better soon, I was planning on having three shorter chapters out back-to-back, but I had a hard weekend and I just haven't felt anything other than embarrassment when I open the google doc, which sucks bc the story is getting to the parts that I've had written since the beginning.

Thanks for all the love that I have gotten💕🫶, sorry for being a big baby and all