#and it's not like it's gotten significantly better
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UConn vs Villanova
paige: see what happens when you keep her on the ball. almost triple double and she would've gotten it had they not been up by like 50. super efficient night, which isn't shocking for her, but even 3/3 from 3 is crazy. i saw her a couple times come to help on defense, but stopped herself and went back to her man, which is good to see.
sarah: sarah strong just doing sarah strong things. she definitely gives p a run for her money when we're talking about best passer. she is so smart for someone so young. every game i am thankful she chose uconn.
kailtyn: this is what i've been waiting for. we've got glimpses here and there, but she balled out tonight. both sides of the court were looking strong. scoring in multiple ways, only 1 turnover, and no foul trouble! hope this builds her confidence, because even she's not playing well, you can still see her leadership influence on this team. you can tell she's smart and good with this younger group.
azzi: super strong defense. glad that it doesn't seem to go down even when she might've not had a great first half offensively. she looked a lot more comfortable and herself in the second. i'm sure if she got to play the fourth, she would've continued to get back, but it was a blowout, so i'm okay with it.
jana: i'm confused as to why she's still getting significantly less minutes than multiple bench players. i think she was much better at staying calm and disciplined, even when they were being a little rough in the paint with her (big surprise for nova). she's finally shooting 50% from ft, so i guess i'll take that babystep. she's just gotta continue to get more consistent though cause a center like her is gonna get fouled a lot.
kk: she just doesn't move me the way she seems to move others. i need more than "high energy" off the bench to warrant her being the first in and getting the most minutes off the bench. her driving to basket to get layups during the fourth is just not doing enough to justify p off the ball when she's in for the first 3 quarters. she's just still not running smart plays or showing how she can be starting pg next year.
ashlynn: defensively she was not great, but i did love seeing her jumping in to catch or tip rebounds. i will take as many aggressive rebounders as possible with this group. middy looked good, but 3 wasn't really falling tonight. glad she found other ways. overall kinda average, but i would like to see her get more minutes in the first half with more starting players than other bench players.
morgan: stats don't do her justice. you know she's gonna box out every time. love her setting screens and passes on offense (accept that one cross court to allie) but i need her start providing a little more scoring than shooting a three or one layup per game. still love her fearlessness and ability to adjust.
aubrey: she's warming up. just glad her vertical still seems good. that fall scared me for a sec.
allie: i wanna see her cut more and get herself available to be able to take a few more shots when she's getting more minutes like this game. glad she's looking more confident though and like seeing her look for ways to score besides the 3.
q: was there.
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So what was that whole idea about Kamiki's true nature?
Since I tend to like children quite a bit, thereâs one point(out of many)in this manga that really bothers me. Around volume 14, there have been several mentions of Kamikiâs âtrue natureâ and whatnot. For instance, in Aquaâs script, itâs mentioned that Ai broke up with him after realizing his true nature, and so on(it wasn't the case in reality).
But when I think about how the authors wrote this character, it doesnât seem like he had an inherently bad nature. As the creators of the story and characters, they would know this better than anyone else. If anything, given his circumstances, he seems like someone with a remarkably good temperament. Thatâs why I couldnât stop thinking about it when the manga was still ongoingâwhat exactly led to him being associated with such accusations? I was curious, itâs confusing. He was kind. And it doesnât seem like he fits into the âkind people turning scary when they snapâ category either, because even in those cases, thereâs usually a limit to how far the outburst goes. Itâs just really strange. How could someone like him lash out at Ai? He couldnât even get angry in the first place. He missed the moments when he shouldâve gotten angry, and even when he had reasons to, he didnât. They built his character like that, I've been paying attention to how they did and I wouldn't be confused if things were different!
When I look at it, it doesnât seem like the authors were trying to write him as fundamentally âevil.â If anything, they seemed to be portraying him as âempty,â and they might have been trying to explore that theme.
Itâs true that the emptiness and lack of affection experienced by people who werenât sufficiently loved during the early stages of their lives can be deeply painful and significantly influence their hearts. But if the story is saying that this emptiness and pain were the cause of him turning into a monster or leading to his downfall, then I find it incredibly disrespectful to people who endure such suffering. I don't think that was what the authors were going for, either. In my opinion, those factors alone donât seem like sufficient reasons for someone with his personality and pain to commit such extreme acts. He wasnât just an ordinarily âniceâ person even; he seemed extraordinarily gentle by nature, at least from what I can tell.
If something external had happened to push him over the edge, then maybe it would make sense. Thatâs why I think he only changed after Aiâs death.
But in the story, aside from Ai, it feels like no one treats him as a human being. Was he really that terrible? From when? Why is he treated this way?
If this is meant to convey some kind of message, maybe I could understand it.
For instance: âBoth deities of the entertainment industry were warped in their own ways because they werenât treated as humanâone was revered as a god, and the other was treated as a monster.â If thatâs the point, I might get it. But was that really conveyed properly?
What frustrates me immensely is that Kamiki was consistently abused from at least the age of 10 or 11, throughout his adolescence, and yet none of the adults around him did anything to helpâthey just left him to suffer. Then, near the end, they react so half-heartedly towards him when he goes to meet some of them, while acting all meaningful and apologetic, as if theyâre atoning for their sins toward Ai. But what about him? It seems like no oneânot a single personâever did anything for him except for Ai, no wonder he's so desperate about her, huh?
And really, what did he even actually do? How far did his crimes go? When he says at the end, âI didnât do anything,â (they actually had him say that) I think thatâs half true and half false. From my perspective, it seems like he awakened after Aiâs death and started using his divine powers, determined he would bring her back. If he were a deity, it would make sense for him to be able to guide peopleâs futures, twist their fates, and decide whether they live or die. That's something he's actually capable of doing, if he's that specific god of light who governs over the industry!! If he committed sins, he should face the consequences. Butâ
If the story had depicted this situation in a clearer sense, like what is actually going about him in the first place, then they couldâve drawn out discussions about how to respond to this character in a more engaging way.
However, this work portrays the character as inherently problematic, yet when you break it down, it leaves you scratching your head. Everything is ambiguous. So, was he always problematic to begin with, or what? The story also includes parts where the protagonists like Akane or Aqua outright suggest that heâs an issue. Is it just because they need to kill him?
If the story were portraying him as if he had that kind of disposition from the beginning, I wouldnât have anything to say⊠I can make that out!! I studied psychology for goodness sake!! As Iâve kept mentioned before, however, this characterâs transformation is closer to complete corruption or a total reversal of temperament. People donât change this drastically on a normal level. Itâs just too strange. If this were explored more thoroughly, it might be more convincing. No matter how much I think about it, the only explanation for why this character was written this way seems to be this, that he is really some god, and I think itâs likely correct.
I mean, he was abused since he was a child, but not a single adult at the time properly addressed it. And I donât even think that alone would have turned him into a criminal. Thatâs not what caused itâ he was holding up for so long, and then, after Ai died, the only person who treated him well was gone. From what I figure, that's like what's the only thing enough to break him THAT BAD. I think he ended up living a miserable existence just to try and do something for her, to dedicate himself to her.
But none of this is clear, and the story just keeps pushing the narrative that âheâs the problem,â âheâs a monster,â and âkilling him will solve everything.â Somewhere along the way, this approach starts to feel unnecessarily cruel and upsetting. Am I reading this wrong? But thatâs how it seems to be written.
Is it really okay to handle this sort of subject this way? Itâs too harsh, both internally and externally. It feels like the character has never been properly addressed or explored.
Sure, heâs an adult now, he needs to take responsibilities. But he was just a kid when he suffered. So young at that. Is it really appropriate to discuss things like a teenagerâs âtrue natureâ or whatever? Sometimes you do see kids with genuinely dangerous and cruel tendencies, but he used to be the exact opposite of such a case. He did not display any aggression. Why frame things this way? The way this story handles this is just mean. For someone who endured abuse and kept smiling to get through it, thatâs an extraordinary level of strength and character. For his case, it isnât about âtrue natureââitâs a product of his environment. And yet they donât explore that? They should. The way the narrative directs readers is deeply unsettling. What were the adults even doing? Thatâs the real issue! Thatâs where the problem lies! Not addressing that and just concluding with his death feels so infuriating. What is this story even trying to do?!
And to add to that, while we talk about him at 10 or 11 years old, I donât think he ever received proper love even before that.
Thatâs why itâs so astonishing that when he met Ai, she said she wanted to live with him forever. It shows how much she genuinely liked him! Despite everything he had been through, he still managed to be that lovable to her. Both of them were so genuine toward each other. For that to happen, she must have been truly happy around himâshe must have felt cared for. It's really hard for someone like that to endorse those kinds of feelings towards someone, she really loved that guy and he probably really deserved it at that point.
Looking at this character, even considering what heâs been through, his outward demeanor is still incredibly kind. Itâs so rare for someone to stay that way despite everything.
The idea of this guy having a ânoble soulâ or âpure spiritâ, "nobility" might connect to the Sarutahiko reference (since that god is described that way), but beyond that, this characterâs natural disposition seems to have been one of the kindest in the entire story. Heâs just been twisted by his experiences. I can believe he really was like that. Even Ai had a dark personality, yet he somehow endured without letting that show at least outwardlyâeven when he was just a kid, even younger than her!
He was genuinely a good person. For someone like that to end up this way? Itâs because he lost Ai and couldnât handle it. He had given all his affection to her. Maybe if there had been someone else in his life to help him, things couldâve been different, but no one besides Ai treated him well. The way the character was written really does suggest thatâs the case.
The problem isnât so much the framework or the plot but the way itâs executed. Itâs so lacking in consideration. This kind of material is too heavy to leave in the realm of mystery-solving. Even so, if they wanted to depict his personality or actions as the problem, they shouldâve written his personality differently and laid the groundwork with different foreshadowing.
They wanted to add mystery elements while still portraying him as kind, so thereâs this constant mismatch. The result is that his character remains unclear. And they canât fully commit to making him a villain because the character is tied to mythologyâheâs clearly based on a god from myth, and that god was incredibly benevolent. Oh my gosh..why do this to a god known for being a loving husband?
Alsoâagainâtalking about the âtrue natureâ of a 14â15-year-old? Sure, itâs not entirely out of the question, but isnât still that going too far? No one talks about Airiâs true nature, so why his? What even is his âtrue natureâ? Blaming a kid for this? For feeling hollow from having been neglected and unloved? Seriously⊠when adults start telling a child theyâre âhopelessly emptyâ or whatever, Iâm just sitting here clutching my head in frustration. He was just a middle schooler! What are you doing? And the adult doing the gaslighting? Theyâre not even a proper human being! Sure, adults like that exist in real life, but still!
The problem is that the story doesnât dismiss it as nonsenseâit actually builds that trait into his character. It doesnât outright contradict it. I guess itâs not entirely wrong of them to point it out, but still⊠itâs so frustrating. These elements function as part of the plot and keep things intriguing, but it feels careless. The story doesnât address the core issue, the problem of the adults having hurt a kid, and that makes it harmful. Anyway⊠Kamikiâs life was just awful. He couldâve turned out so much better. Thatâs whatâs heartbreaking about him. And itâs not even entirely clear whether he didnât turn out okay. His responsibility on this all is so ambiguous. What if he really didn't want to hurt anyone like he's said, but things turned out that way anywayâwhat are we supposed to do with that?
Well, considering what he thought about Ruby, I guess thatâs not entirely the case(omg) but I think the whole "feeling Ai" might have actually had some sort of base from his standpoint. What if he knew doing that would work for certain but held back but didnât kill her because she was his and Ai's child (he says that she's theirs) then felt âI shouldâve tried something when I had the chanceâ in his dying breaths huh? Wouldnât that be tragic? Messed up but I think that's what could have been what's going on! I could see that being possible. But still, what kind of nerve does he have⊠ugh⊠the audacity⊠How could he do that to his own daughter lol. At this point I think that's the writer's fault, not the character because it's so ridiculous. What even is this manga? Iâm at a loss for words.
Honestly, I wish they hadnât used such heavy themes. The manga can be entertaining but itâs too emotionally taxing. The author handles these serious topics in such a strange way, and itâs exhausting. I'd go as far to say it feels a bit irresponsible at times.
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You meet your other sister-in-law very briefly.
She arrives unannounced in full Odonii garb and a long cloak for the cold, soaked through with rain. She's taller than most men, and carries herself like one too. Her hair spills out of her veil, not only unbraided but a horrendous mess. It's kind of fascinating. You catch a glimpse of a handgun slung across her back, hidden beneath her cloak. This is especially exciting; youâve never seen one up close. You try to peek around her to get a better look at it, and flush in embarrassment when she catches you, shooting you a cold glare.
It doesn't seem like she speaks much without being spoken to, and you arenât really the type to initiate conversations either. Livya fills in for the both of you, prompting your sister-in-law to introduce herself. Her name is Couya. You give her a respectful bow and curtsy, she gives a very slight bow back without looking you in the eye. She compliments your necklace. Or at least, she mumbles something while looking in the general direction of your necklace, and it might have been a compliment. You arenât sure whether thereâs something wrong with her or sheâs just rude.
She's just her for filial duties at the family shrine, and she doesn't stay long. Livya stops her on her way out. She says she's disappointed that the one time in a year she can be bothered to come by, she shows up looking like a disheveled street-whore in priest's clothing. Look at Hibrides, she didn't even know we were having company and still did up her hair so nicely, and all by herself too. Thank God your father isn't here to see this, he's suffered enough embarrassment as it is-.
Couya stands in the doorway in silence through this whole speech. You thoroughly inspect a loose tile in the floor and try your best to pretend you aren't there. Livya doesn't take her hand off your shoulder the whole time.
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[I've been writing an overview of Hibrides' first several years of marriage for the hell of it. It's just a summary but it's written with like, the slightest bit of prose, so figured I'd dump a section here]
#Not sure why I started writing this in 2nd person but it's stuck like that now#Livya was the most depressed housewife that has ever lived and deeply unwell. Neither of her daughters went through the#normal experiences she had to of marriage and moving away from home and having children and etc so when Janeys abandons Hibrides#in her home for about 3 years she kinda gloms onto her and treats her like another daughter. She projects on Hibrides HARD#because she reminds her of what she was like as a 15 year old bride. Sees Hibrides as having gotten fucked over with a terrible#husband (which isn't Wrong but its straight up significantly better than how her other options probably would've turned out)#and wants to toughen her up for what she sees as an inevitably dismal life ahead.#This isn't great for the newlywed child who just got moved away from everything she ever knew and abandoned with her#complete stranger of a mother in law.#And also finds herself in the 'golden child used to shame the other children' position frequently which is what's going on here#I might post the whole summary but this is like. The most grimdark part of Hibrides' entire life like its pretty damn rough.#Kind of by nature because it's about being a 15 y/o child bride (not considered a child in this society but like you know).#Also kinda of gives the wrong idea for what she's like later as an actual adult with substantially more agency in her situation.#hibrides uryashta#couya haidamane#livya haidamane
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Exactly. has star wars always tried to be radically progressive ? sure, yeah, the ot compared the alliance to vietnamese anti american imperialism resistance, the prequels depicted victims of religious persecution and genocide as sympathetic at the height of demonisation of islam and violence in the middle east. Has it always suceed? does it give characters played by actors of all ethnicities the same care ? does it avoid falling into racist tropes? fuck no. And itâs undebatable it historically has centered white characters. So yeah the dudebros are wrong to say star warsâ thesis is either politically neutral or milquetoast liberal âboth sides have flawsâ, but that doesnât make star wars good at being radical and exempt of examination of how itself perpetuated racism in many instances. both can coexist.
"in star wars, the villains are old white men for a reason" and the heroes are almost always young white people. So.
#remember when the indigneous population of endor took c3po for a god. like yeah in rotj the victory is brought by collaboration#i could write an essay on how filoni and claudia gray's idea of discrimination in the star wars universe is flawed and allows for#harmful narratives around race and queerness to be parroted#the whole there's no racism in between humans based on race but there is anti immigration sentiment and anti non human discrimination#and no homophobia all this applied to both resistance and imperial circles#is so so fucked. racialized people and queer folks were very very real victims of fascitic systems and that is by design#facism necessitates to manufacture unjustified hierarchies based on divising and pitting people of opposing identities as much as possible#so depicting the empire as racially neutral and discriminating only against aliens and droids is. huh. bad. and drawing comparisons between#marginalized people and robots/aliens is just a very difficult thing to pull off without being offensive. see : oola#and it's not like it's gotten significantly better#filoni redid the ahahah aliens take c3po for a god in tcw and recently had a black woman as a looter in the bad batch#as if portraying black people as criminals wasn't something one should be very careful about; and since irl africa was looted by europe#of its cultural artefacts it wasn't very uncomfortable to have a black woman help a group of withwashed men loot artefacts for money#anyways bigotry in star wars. man.#PH AND QUEERNESS#queerness in disney star wars. my beloathed. similarly to race th empire is coded as indifferent to gender non conformity and gay attractio#as is shown in lost stars with the two main protagonists having each an openly gnc gay coded best friend in the imperial academy thriving#in the belly of facism which is. not accurate to how facism operates anywhere#same with the protagonist of lost stars who is a black woman victim of discrimation on her planet; not for her race but for being part of#the first wave of settlers; and her father rejoices of the rise of the empire because it will and i quote#put everyone on the same level by oppressing everyone equally#this is so inaccurate but how any facist regime works !! i keep making that point because yeah some liberties with historical fonctionment#of facism can be taken. but those depicting the very victims of facism as its happy enforcers and not tokens is just a very tasteless and#offensive narrative to portray. and it's born of unwillingness to confront what writing a character having a marginalized identity actually#entails and is to avoid#anyways so that girl joins the empire. and is narratively rewarded by facing less discrimination. LESS DISCRIMINATION WITHIN IMPERIALISM.#this book drove me insane#ch pls let me know if i overstepped with my comment#anwayways not superprised claudia gray is friends with miss colonialism book ek johnston#both have a very dictinct and frustrating way of writing queerness in tsar wars aka keeping it implied in the books and confirming outside
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So like did we all agree we're going to ignore the fact that China is a little old lady now, or is it just me.
#skulduggery pleasant#china sorrows#a mind full of murder#I just hit her first appearance in this book and I'm like..... no đ#i am choosing to picture her as having gotten significantly older looking but in a less debilitating way#like less bent over frail gram gram and more elegant GILF#i am no better than a man. she needs to be HOT damn it
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hinds and hounds
#vanyel ashkevron#bard stefen#the last herald mage#heralds of valdemar#mercedes lackey#tried something different with this one and Iâm very đ about it#the wood grain gave me such a fucking headache and I still dknât really like how it turned out#also standard âthis is tracedâ disclaimer but this time itâs all my photos of my hands so Iâm not linking anything#I wish I was close with someone who had significantly larger/smaller hands than me because then I couldâve gotten even better photos#but alas Vanyel and Stefenâs hands are doomed to be the same size#mine
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she vaso on my vagal till i syncope
#presyncoped this morning not a fun time#in bed feeling like it may happen again#will tomorrow be the day i hit the ground at work god i hope not#in the past month my dysautonomia symptoms have gotten. significantly worse#concerning#vasovagal syncope#used to be like. full syncope once a year#now i know better than to keep standing that long but i presyncope like. once a month at a minimum#I THOUGHT THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO GO AWAY WHEN I GOT OLDER
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I don't think anybody rlly cares but I'd like to share that one of my parakeets, bolt who has been incredibly hand averse since I got him, has finally started to become comfortable with me, comfy enough to feed from my hand without *bolting* (ba-dum tss) at the slightest hand movement đ„čđ„č I'm sooo proud of him, I was super worried he would never become comfortable with me, he still has a lot to work on, as he still is jumpy, moreso than Scones (his companion), but progress is progress and this is the best kind of progress rn !!!
#im training scones to tap on the cage bars whenever i give him a treat and i believe bolt has been observing and taking note of my-#-gentleness and that im not actually dangerous. it was superrrr jarring when i was feeding scones and he [bolt] started mimicking scones'-#-âi want a treatâ behavior.#i was skeptical to give him a treat as i didnt want to scare him but i did and he didnt get scared like he normally would which made me soo-#-happy đ„č ive been waiting to see this day for so long#Bolt has fed from my hand before but its rare and ONLY when Scones is actively feeding from my hand as well#my boring day has gotten significantly less boring / even better#yapping
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I need to ramble more about Esteban Flores, because everything about this character and his arc seem as though it was tailor-made for me and specifically designed to make me absolutely feral.
This going below the cut, both because I do not want to spoil the entire show for my friend who is think of watching Elena of Avalor and because I go full-on apologist here and I feel like that will annoy some people.
Imagine making the absolute worst mistake than anyone could possibly make, because you are 18 and scared and stupid and tired of being ignored. And it results in you losing your family and your freedom and what little self-respect you had left because you know all of this is very much your own fault.
 And so you proceed to spend the next 41(!) years eking out a miserable existence in an oppressive state. Upon fear for your life, you are forced to be the reluctant right-hand of the evil witch-queen who conquered your country, killed your aunt and uncle and trapped your cousin in magical prison. In spite of this, you nevertheless do everything within your limited power trying to hold the kingdom together and make sure the people don't starve, because the queen certainly doesn't care about anything except greedily bleeding your country dry.
And no exaggeration, this is just what canon explicitly gives us outright in the pilot. Like that's not even getting into head canons/interpretations/common sense of what exactly this sort of life entailed for you. Because this is a children's show so there's only so much they will let us imply about living under that kind of system. Especially as a young, attractive, terrified person who is the last living member of the previous royal family who is likely being kept alive partly as a combination trophy/punching bag for the evil queen (even if the show never actually states this outright).
And then by some miracle, what's left of your family comes back after all this time. The evil queen is overthrown, partly because you yourself finally stood up to her at a critical moment. You and your country are finally free again, and what's more, you and your family are finally together again after over 4 decades. But you still feel like an outsider--partly because you always were an outsider in your family even in the better times and partly because  over the past 41(!) years, time stood still for all of them except you.
And as a result, no one ever cares to ask what those 41 years were like for you or even just if youâre doing okay. Not only because your family canât even begin to comprehend what it must have been like, but also because they donât care to even *try* to understand. Because the narrative has decided that everyone elseâs respective traumas is worth way more than your own. Â (Though tbf the narrative really doesnât dwell much on anyoneâs trauma in general but yours gets especially neglected , except to briefly play it for laughs or to remind you that your trauma is *your own fault and only your own*).
For a little while, life is pretty okay. Itâs weird not having to watch your step every instant to make sure youâre not putting a toe out of line. And so you never really fully break out of your âsurvival modeâ conditioning, making sure that you are still considered important and valuable enough to keep around.
But all the while, you know that your pastâand especially your terrible little secretâis eventually going to come back to haunt you. And it does. First via blackmail and then via the return of the evil witch-queen herself. Fortunately, she is defeated for good before she can take avenge your âbetrayal of herâ but you still have to deal with seeing the ghost from the past who terrorized you for 41(!) years.
And then, your secret finally comes out in the open and you are disowned by your familyâthe family you *just* got back a few years agoâfor an admittedly super bad decision that you made over four decades ago and have regretted ever since. Â Rather than face the rest of your life in isolation (as though you didnât already have enough of that during the previous regime), you escape before you can be sent into exile. This puts you directly in the path of *another* terrifying, evil magical milf who you are forced to ally yourself with. Because you have 40+ years of conditioning that when a woman like that says âjump,â you say âhow high?â if you are to have any hope of survival. Â Especially given that the only people who couldâve protected you from her are the family and friends who have just definitively washed their hands of you.
Despite this, you are still trying to seek your cousinâs forgiveness and to protect her in the little ways that you can. But you are constantly getting rebuffed over and over again, and if anything, your attempts at reconciliation only seem to make your cousin angrier, and she now hates you just as much asâif not MORE thanâthe woman who actually murdered her parents.
Your cousin is so angry at you specifically that she actively ignores the greater threat of Witchy Milf 2.0, because she happens to see your face and is enraged. This ends up backfiring spectacularly for you both, though it does indirectly lead to the defeat of said Witchy Milf 2.0.
But guess what? Â Thereâs no time to breathe or celebrate, because her defeat occurred during the successful summoning of a third power-mad, feminine-presenting magical humanoid and her allies. At least, this one treats you with some initial respect and actually gives you outright what you-think-youâve-thought-you-always wanted. But she also turns your family and friends to stone in front of you as a warning of whatâs to come if you dare to defy her.
But this time, you are finally done with this, have finally lost enough that you have paradoxically found your courage. You sacrifice yourself to save your cousin, and she is finally able to accept that youâve sacrificed and changed enough that she can forgive you. And her forgiveness is so powerful and pure that it not only restores you to life but also undoes all the other evil magic. Together, you defeat this final enemy, paradoxically by banishing her to the same Underworld where your mistakes accidentally sent your aunt and uncle and her parents long ago. Â Peace has been restored. You have returned for good and are finally secure in your familyâs love.
And after all that, there are *still* people (both presumably in universe and in the fandom outside of it) who say it's too little, too late and that it would've been better for everyone if you'd simply stayed dead.
Like I'm just... are we really victim-blaming the character who has 45 years of unprocessed trauma and guilt (both survivor's guilt and guilt in general) because of a decision he made when his brain was still developing and he was being manipulated by an older, much more powerful person?
#elena of avalor#elena of avalor meta#esteban flores#chancellor esteban#like how do you do this to me--an english major--#and not expect me to be completely unhinged about it?#like the parallelism. the THEMES.#the fact that having to abide by established sofia the first canon#meant that the writers had to significantly prolong the length of both esteban's and elena's respective traumas#i get that they had to but like 41 years? they still did THAT#and they expect me to be normal about it#don't get me wrong; i am not blaming elena for her response#it was normal and understandable and given her position; i may have acted the same#but at the same time; 41(!) years of trauma that the narrative just assumes esteban did and should've gotten over by now#even though they are not expecting elena to have gotten over the same 41-years of trauma?#and not just little trauma with a little âtâ; we're talking TRAUMAâą#someone get this man to the Ever Realm equivalent of therapy#like i'm not totally wild about s3 in general (we should've had an final season to deal with the coronation day aftermath)#but like the finale still hit all the right narrative beats that i needed so I'm okay-ish#and it still handled esteban's final arc much better than the similar final cassandra arc from tangled the series#imo at least
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i don't like one of those asks i got a while ago... i never want to imply that juno was anything but wonderful during our relationship - i couldn't tell you one thing i wish was different when we were dating. he was the perfect boyfriend for me. it was only months after we broke up that it came to my attention how nasty he's gotten.
#ic#my opinion of him has significantly degraded but i stand by the fact that in my wildest dreams i couldn't come up with#anything better than being with him.#at no point was he abusive towards me.#our relationship ended because i couldn't tale care of him when he got sick while i was recovering from death.#he could not handle the sight of me and i was not in a state where i could help him through it.#it leaves a nasty taste in my mouth to hear that some people have gotten the idea that his current behavior is indicative of past behavior#behind closed doors.#the opposite is so. we acted up in public but he was a sweetheart at home. he liked to be carried around and treated like a prince.#he liked to be called angel and sugarplum. he liked giving presents and snuggling under my sweaters.#he liked to paint and sculpt and dance.#he wanted to meet my family. he wanted to get along with them.#not more than he wanted to be himself of course. but he was hopeful that they would stomach him.#he liked to dress up.#he picked out outfits for me. i used his earrings a lot.#we did each others makeup. we baked. we skinny dipped and took boat rides and hay rides and sleigh rides.#he liked to make me laugh.
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hi. ive taken this trip now. ive come out with new and controversial opinions on bus systems
#the tldr of it is that i think transport canberra has better buses than nswtransport#however i think that opal is a significantly smoother ticketing system than myway#why do i have to submit a form online to maybe top up my balance in the next five days. i can top up my opal card instantly#or well. i could if i remembered my opal login ever but thats MY problem#also my opal card has never gotten mad at me for trying to tap it while inside a wallet of some kind. the myway card reader wants me dead#that said. both doors actually work on the buses in canberra and i do appreciate the display with the stops so i dont have to just like#fucking guess when to hit the stop button for where i need to be#many things to consider here#original post placeholder tag
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look if triton was able to be vox-ified after being literally blown up by a bomb that he was holding inches away from his face. then i think some of the other inhumans were also ok. like i think they could have just broke the mind control on most of them and theyd have been ok. there were like,, 15k inhumans attacked by vox,,, i think more than just the royals got out of that one
#like triton was absolutely 100% dead. triton would have been random organs and goo. wgatever they did to make him ok and brainwashable#then like just do that to everyone else who died. and then unbrainwash them. if all it takes is one big ol knock on the head then like.#just do that and then a lot of therapy!!#look ill accept a lot died from bb at the very end of the series. but like ALL of them?? nah man. tiberius was in a different room.#its just that none of the royals looked to see if anyone else survived and broke out of the mind control. like a solid 300 inhumans#are probably just. lost and running around. realistically probably a few thousand at the minimum#if triton somehow survived that bomb i think he could have handled a significantly weakened bb whisper. i think he could have gotten better.#hes still alive. to me.#blackagar boltagon#triton mander azur
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last few times I've come to the hospital the mental health section receptionists have been like "Hi Dante!" like they don't even ask for my RUT anymore which is yknow the standard thing to do. they're just like yeah yeah Dante we've all heard of him we all know him .... and the 1st lady to do that wasn't TOO surprising since she's the one who usually makes my appointments but just now I had to change some appointments I had in March to fit better w/ my school schedule and the lady that greeted me I had seen maybe ONCE during my whole time coming here .... and she called me by my NAME ?????
#it doesn't make me uncomfortable it's just crazy to me đđđ#only reason I can think of is MAYBE my therapist talking about me ???#cause she really likes me (because I'm soooo niceys) and the way I've gotten significantly better since I started here#diary
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Me this afternoon before publishing the new chapter: There is nothing you or I can do to bring him back now
Me after finishing chapter 2: He has risen baby girl *iris by the goo goo dolls plays in the background*
#I havent even watched the Deadpool x wolverine movie i just like fhe audio#it feel it fits my emotions as of current#like my mood has significantly gotten better because i finished and published the chapter#glassheart academic rivals au#i love them so much#the sapphics have raised my spirits and i might rip through another chapter tomorrow we will see đ
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Guess who just got a new pfp
#ill kind of miss having my art as a pfp but Ive gotten significantly better at drawing since then so its kind of outdated#also Im like gonna start posting my art so its no big loss
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holy moly your art has improved so much since the last time ive been on here!!!!!! every time i see your blog your art gets even better
Aw, thanks đ€
#i feel like ive gotten significantly better in the last 2 years#but itll probably slow down now thst im back in grad school and also trying to b more social lol#but well see. i think im at an ok level now#unrelated
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