#and it's just so frustrating to see this happen when I loved her so

[slutforvoldy]

“ YOU'RE LOSING ME. ” ( lando norris ! )

SUMMARY: the reader struggles with the painful realization that no matter how much she gives, lando will never fight for her the way she fights for him.

word count: 1.3k

warnings: angst, lando is a d!ck, gaslighting, communication issues, mentions of y/n

pairing: lando norris x female!reader

tag-list: @oscduck81

a/n: this may or may not be loosely inspired by a real life experience..........

THE ROOM WAS dimly lit, the soft blue glow of Lando’s sim racing setup casting shadows across the walls. The hum of his game filled the silence, the sharp sound of tires screeching on a digital track drowning out the soft, broken sobs escaping your lips.

You lay curled up on the bed, your back turned to him. Salty tears slipped down your cheeks, soaking into the pillow. You weren’t even sure why you were crying anymore—was it sadness? frustration? or just the aching emptiness that was growing inside you?

You knew he could hear you. He always could.

But just like every other night, he turned up the volume of his game. Hinting an unspoken message: I don’t want to hear you. I don’t want to deal with you.

And gosh, it hurts.

He always does this. He rarely talks to you despite living in the same apartment. As if there is a big wall between the two of you. As if both of you have two different worlds. His priorities had shifted, and you weren’t part of them anymore. Gaming. Racing. Nights out with friends. Work. Everything came before you. And no matter how much you tried to convince yourself otherwise, you knew deep down that he just didn’t care the way he used to.

He used to act differently when your relationship started. You missed the time when it felt like his world revolved around you, when he made you feel like you were the most important thing in his life, but now you don't know when or what went wrong. You can only wonder what happened to the man you love.

Your friends are all begging you to leave.

"Wake up, Y/N!" "You deserve better." "What else is there to hold on to?"

It started to become obvious that the things Lando has been doing have been affecting you to the point that you started seeing a therapist, desperately trying to piece yourself back together.

But the worst part is that Lando never even noticed.

You knew that this was not healthy. You knew you should leave. But things are easier said than done.

The thought of walking away—of starting over, of loving someone who wasn’t him—made your stomach twist. It felt impossible, unbearable.

Despite everything, despite the pain, you still wanted to stay. You clung to the hope that one day he would wake up and realize what he was losing. That he would see you again—as someone he once loved. Someone worth fighting for.

So you stayed. Because letting go felt harder than holding on.

It’s a big day in Abu Dhabi—the moment that will decide the 2024 Formula 1 constructors' championship. McLaren almost has an even tie with Ferrari; therefore, they desperately needed Lando to win. So you take your time to self-soothe after what happened last night.

"You just don’t understand, Y/N. Why can’t you just accept the fact that I’m a busy person?" Lando exclaimed, frustration lacing his voice.

You let out a sharp laugh, shaking your head. "Oh, I’m sorry—if bar-hopping with your friends and getting all over the media with random girls counts as 'busy,' then I must be such an idiot for not taking the hint!"

His jaw tightened. "Those pictures are from a long time ago," he muttered.

"Oh, really?" you said amusingly while scoffing.

Silence stretched between you before you finally snapped. "All I ever wanted was for you to notice me! To talk to me! Hell, to actually see me! Is that really too much to ask?"

Lando ran a hand through his hair, exhaling. "I don’t understand, Y/N. I’m giving you all the attention I can."

But it was never enough. It never felt like enough.

You sighed in defeat, your voice barely above a whisper. "I know you wouldn’t understand."

This morning, like every morning, you glared at him with storms in your eyes. But he didn’t notice—he never did. You wondered how numb he could be to not feel your grip on him slipping away. How could you love someone and not see them breaking right in front of you?

All you needed was his reassurance—that despite everything happening, despite the way he treated you, you were still the one he loved. But every time you brought it up, he twisted it around, making it seem like you were the problem. Every conversation turned into an argument instead of a solution, and with each fight, your resentment only grew.

One night, you needed him more than ever. After a brutal argument with your parents, they kicked you out, leaving you with nowhere to go. Lando was the only person you could turn to—the one person you thought you could rely on.

"I tried calling you. I rang your doorbell over and over and over again, but you never answered." Your voice wavered, frustration and hurt bleeding through. "So tell me, Lando—where were you that night?"

"I was sleeping!" he insisted, his tone defensive.

You let out a sharp, bitter laugh. "Sleeping? Really?" You shook your head in disbelief. "I literally saw the notification on your Twitch that you were live with Max!" Your voice cracked as anger and betrayal surged through you. "You left me outside your house for hours!"

Lando exhaled sharply. "Maybe it’s your fault for always expecting too much," he muttered under his breath, but you caught every word.

Your stomach twisted as you stared at him. "Excuse me?"

"Maybe..." His voice became louder. "It’s my fault for not being enough for you," he added, his voice flat.

"Or maybe it's our fault for not making this relationship work properly."

That was your breaking point.

Lando won the Abu Dhabi Grand Prix, securing McLaren’s victory in their fierce battle against Ferrari for the Constructors' Championship. You were proud—proud that your boyfriend had claimed another Grand Prix win, proud that his team had finally won. But deep down, you knew the truth: tonight, he wouldn’t be celebrating with you.

You often envied the girlfriends of other drivers—the way they rushed into their arms after a win, how they spent their victories surrounded by their girlfriends and families. But for you, it was different. You longed for that warmth.

Now, it was time to pose for the cameras, to put on a dazzling smile and make your relationship look picture-perfect—at least on the surface. In the photos, you were the devoted girlfriend, the perfect couple. But behind your fake smile, a storm raged inside you.

You had always been there for him—through his highs and lows, his victories and defeats. But when it was you who needed him, he was nowhere to be found.

And as the flashes of cameras captured the illusion of happiness, a sinking realization settled in your chest. You couldn’t keep living like this. You couldn’t keep giving all of yourself to someone who never gave anything back.

One thing was clear tonight—you were done hurting yourself for someone who wouldn’t do the same for you.

You took a taxi back to the hotel alone, your vision blurred with tears as the city lights streaked past. The moment you stepped into the room, you began packing—hands trembling, heart racing. You hadn’t planned this, but deep down, you knew it was inevitable. It wasn’t just impulsive; it was necessary.

As you zipped up your suitcase, your fingers brushed against a worn polaroid tucked between your clothes. Your favorite picture—back when love still felt easy, when he still looked at you like you were his entire world. You held it for a moment, your thumb tracing the edges, debating whether to take it with you.

But some things belonged to the past.

Flipping it over, you picked up the hotel pen and, with a heavy heart, wrote your final words.

I love you forever, Lando. I'm forever grateful. —Y/N

You placed the polaroid on the bed, letting it rest there. Then, with a deep breath, you grabbed your bags and walked to the door.

Before stepping out, you turned back for one last glance at everything you're about to leave behind. All of the memories you and Lando had, either good or bad.

Just like that, you walked out of his life, and with every step, the weight you had carried for so long finally began to lift.

[neeeooon]

Hiiii . I really love your work . Could you please do one with Rin , Kaiser , isagi and anyone you like in which there are rumours of the boys with models and the entire social media thinks is full of these rumours so the s/o feels insecure . You don’t have to if you don’t want to ☺️

oh the drama!! my fave lol TYSM FOR THE REQUEST 🫶🫶

when he has dating rumors with someone who isn’t you

famous bf bllk x insecure gn!reader. slight angst, most fluff

itoshi rin

-> you honestly didn’t think rin would ever find himself in a dating rumor with someone else. rin. your emotionally and socially constipated boyfriend

-> yet when the article comes out, despite how weak the “evidence” is (rin and a model looking at each other for 0.2 seconds at an event), you start doubting yourself. you didn’t mean to overthink, and you’d typically ignore it, but the person he was being shipped with was a professional model

-> “babe?” “hm?” “do you think she’s pretty?” you show him the models picture and he squints at it. “no. who even is that?” “… the model?” “what model?” “the one you’re getting heavily shipping with online?” “what does that even mean?”

-> you forgot how much your boyfriend avoids social media. for some reason, that makes you much happier. “well, good. if you ever see her in public, run away!” “uh, okay? why’d you ask what i think of her?” “oh, no reason…” “.. you’re the only person i find pretty, y/n.” “🤭”

michael kaiser

-> you ignore them at first, but it was getting more and more frustrating, especially when your boyfriend didn’t even seem to care

-> you know kaiser is pretty. you know he’s talented, and you know he likes to flirt. you don’t like other people knowing and complimenting him with flushed cheeks and fluttering lashes, especially when those other people are models and actors

-> when you finally asked him about it, he thought you were only joking and laughed it off. “yeah, because i’m dating someone behind the scenes. it’s just how i interact with people. if they think i’m flirting, that’s their fault.” you aren’t pleased with his response and give him the silent treatment the rest of the night

-> “y/n,” he whispers by your ear the next morning, and you roll over to glare at him. his playful grin falls when he sees dried tears on your cheeks. “i’m not cheating on you. you know that, don’t you?” “i don’t know. i don’t like that you can knowingly lead all these gorgeous people on in public like it’s nothing…”

-> “it is nothing, hey,” he gently tilts your chin in his direction when you try to turn away. “i promise, it’s nothing. it’s all an act for the media, y/n, i promise. i only love you. i have only loved and will only ever love you. i swear it.”

isagi yoichi

-> “i didn’t do anything, i swear!” he starts pleading before you even have a chance to read the article. a model was spotted wearing a necklace extremely similar to the one you gave your boyfriend, the one he never takes off

-> except, you took it to the cleaners a few days ago and hadn’t had the time to pick it up. in those days without it, some random model happened to get one just like it, thus starting rumors

-> you laughed at your boyfriend’s frantic expression and smushed his face between your hands. “it’s sweet to see you all flustered, but don’t worry. i picked your necklace up this morning while you were at practice.” you didn’t like how people online were already shipping them, but at least he was here, begging in front of you, instead of with her

-> isagi practically crumpled in relief. “babe, when i tell you a broke so many speeding laws to get here so you wouldn’t think they were true. you know i’m gonna marry you someday, right?” “yeah, well, you better..” but now he’s the one laughing at your flushed cheeks

[getaapologist]

The Geta x Servant!Reader lore just keeps getting better and better 😍😭 If it ever strikes your fancy, I would love to see what happens if someone else (a bold servant or a drunk senator perhaps) tried to put their hands on her. Or literally anything else you want to write because I will continue eating it up and enjoying every moment of it!

More servant!reader because why not? We all deserve happiness.

[ Prior entry in the servant!reader blurb saga here ]

Loud, boisterous laughter. Soft music filtering in, a cool evening that drew the guests out into the gardens. 

The stars were bright pinpricks of light above, the sky clear.

Large hands gripped your calves, your ankles, your legs strewn across Geta’s lap. He was deep in conversation with a senator, who thought the wine and merriment might make Geta more amenable to whatever his desires were.

Or perhaps, having you in his lap would do the trick. 

If there was any discomfort in your legs, it would have been worked out quickly as Geta kneaded your muscles. 

“Emperor?” you whispered, not wanting to interrupt him, but greatly desiring one of the sweet cakes back in the main room.

He didn’t take his eyes off the Senator, but gave your ankle a squeeze, as if he sensed you wished to get up. His touch returned the shackle, but it was no longer a burden or a restraint. It was a soft band of silk, a tether, a way back to him. 

His hands left your legs and he glanced over as you slid off his lap, his eyes raking over you. “Do not be long, little lamb.”

The grass was cold beneath your bare feet, and the stone floor was even colder still. Geta had stolen your sandals earlier, deft fingers pulling at the thin leather cords keeping them on.

Still, your destination was just ahead, the table piled high with sweets and other things. You took your time, adding things to a small plate that you enjoyed, but also things you knew Geta particularly liked, just in case he wanted something. 

“I have not seen you at these gatherings before, for I would surely remember you.” The voice carried a smile with it, and you looked up, laying eyes on a man you did not recognize, clad in the white robes of a senator. “What is your name?” 

The smell of the bitter wine on his breath was unavoidable. You could see the slight sway in his posture as he stood, emboldened by the alcohol.

You knew better, you knew this was a situation you wanted to avoid. You missed the protective aura that Geta provided. You felt untouchable when with him. You wished you could tug on that tether, bring Geta over. But in lieu of that, you tried to remain polite as you dismissed his interest. “I must go, excuse me.”

A firm, unrelenting grip wrapped around your upper arm, stopping you, pulling you back to where he stood, his brows drawn together in barely veiled frustration.

“You refuse to answer me?”

“You really shouldn’t do that,” Caracalla warned, his voice lilting as an amused grin spread across his face. "That's his favorite." He approached the table, loading up a small plate of his own as if this confrontation were not occurring.

You could not ask Caracalla to intervene, You did not enjoy the same latitude with him as you did with his brother. You could only bring your arms up to try to shield yourself from the man’s prying eyes.

The hand at your arm tightened its grip, yanking you forward. The plate in your hands fell to the floor with a loud clatter, drawing all attention to where you stood.

Embarrassment and fear filled you, remnants of your former work not feeling so distant now as you looked down at the mess on the floor. You longed to scoop it up, lamenting the wasted sweet cakes.

“You will unhand her, senator!” Geta spoke, his voice laden with fury.

Before the man could, his hand was wrenched away from you, his breath leaving his lungs in a forceful huff as he was pushed up against a nearby column. Your skin burned painfully where the man’s hand had been. 

Caracalla leaned against the table nearby, watching with great amusement.

Geta raged, the halls echoing with his threats. His face and throat were bright red, neck flexing, veins prominent. You overheard something about being fed to lions before you needed a distraction from the attention.

Discomfort overwhelming, you knelt down to the floor, scooping the ruined cakes onto the empty plate in an effort to forestall the tears. The cakes were so destroyed, they were in small pieces, your hands growing quite messy as you attempted to clean them up.

“Leave it,” Geta whispered, his large hands stilling yours. The sticky sweet mess did not bother him, his large brown eyes worried. As he saw your expression, he moved his palms to your cheeks, urging you to look at him.

Shame burned through you, as if this was all your fault. “I am sorry, Emperor.”

Geta shook his head, anger in his expression, though it was not directed at you. “No, little lamb,” he whispered. “This is not your fault.” His tenderness was almost shocking after the volley of verbal abuse he’d just spewed at the senator. 

Geta stood, orders leaving his reddened throat. The senator was cast out, never to be invited again. The mess was cleaned up, a fresh plate laden with more sweets sent to his chambers. He even managed to ignore Caracalla’s derisive chuckling as he used a wet cloth to clean the both of your fingers.

“Cheer up, little lamb,” he smiled softly, nudging your chin with his knuckle. His large chestnut eyes watched you, eventually falling to the arm where the man had grabbed you.

“Thank you,” you whispered, reaching for his wrist. His eyes flitted down to the point of contact before meeting yours again, something else in his gaze.

He seemed to hesitate, something unexpected causing him to falter for a moment. And only a moment. Hunger surfaced in his eyes, his desire to smooth things over, to get you to forget about the handsy senator surely at the forefront of his mind. “Come, let me feed you all the cake you care to enjoy, mea mellitula.”

A/N: 'mea mellitula' is roughly my honey. Maybe we forgot about the finger incident, but clearly Geta didn't.

[sunsets12]

could you talk a bit more about the poem from the most recent chapter??

so beautiful!

I'm assuming this is Finnick's poem and not the song at the end of part 4 (if you are asking about the song at the end, honestly the genius page can probably explain it better than me)

Finnick's poem is an edited excerpt from Doll Parts by Hole. The lead singer of Hole was interested in Kurt Cobain and wrote this song about "her insecurity that someone as wonderful to her as him could be interested in her" (via Genius) , but I'll dissect it from Finnick's POV:

I am doll eyes, doll mouth, doll legs

I am doll arms, big veins, dog bait

These lines are about how he feels dehumanized by the Capitol, and how they use him as a doll essentially (both to play with and a sex doll). Big veins is a reference to heroin use, and while Finnick (in my fic) has never used heroin, it is a reference to how a lot of Victors turn to various substances to get through the day.

"Dog bait" again refers to the dehumanization of district citizens, and can be seen as an almost literal reference towards mutts in the arena or more metaphorical reference to how district citizens are thrown out and abused for whatever the Capitol needs.

Side note: "Dog bait," is actually "dog beg" in the original song, but it looks like Hole changed it to "dog bait" in their Peel Session. Idk, I've always heard the line as dog bait, and like that better, so I used that.

They really want you, they really do

They really want you, and I do too

And this is where we can see Percy come into play. Percy is an infamous Victor, both very attractive, unattainable, and a brutal and highly skilled fighter. Almost seeming inhuman in his capabilities. "They" in the first line refers to the Capitol, so by saying "and I do too," Finnick is almost equating himself to them in a derogatory way. We'll see this a bit more in the Finnick fic, but he has a LOT of self-esteem problems, especially when it comes to romantic relationships. He doesn't see himself as being worthy of Percy because of the abuse and exploitation he's suffered at the hands of the Capitol. He views Percy as too good for him.

I want to be the one with the most cake

Once again, this line hits at how he wants to love Percy and be with him, but he feels like he doesn't deserve it. It also eludes to "you can't have your cake and eat it too" so even though he's *technically* with Percy, they can't really be together openly because of the Capitol.

I love him so much, it just turns to rage

He loves Percy, and it's frustrating because they can't openly be together/he doesn't feel like he can fully give himself to Percy

I fake it so true I am beyond fake

Finnick is pretty much constantly wearing a mask (with minor exceptions when he's only around other Victors), so this goes back to him constantly feeling like he's not a real person/is a doll

Someday you will ache like I ache

He wants the Capitol to suffer. He wants retribution, even if he doesn't think it will actually happen

[sapphiccup]

Never Enough!!! Pt3,

Councilor Sevika x singerreader

Wc:4,888

Summary: Getting drunk with Sevika, tensions arise with Councilors, and unexpected turn of events. Reader is currently going through a cycle of troubled waters, that not only involves herself but a certain Councilor as well.

Cw: eighteen + SFW/ NSFW, fluff, Councilor Sevika, strong language, political, pining, eventual smutt in later chapters, btw reader has tits. MINORS AND MEN DNI!

An.) Please remember to check out my introduction on my blog if you’re confused about anything.

Going to bar to bar, drinking anything to escape what ever the fuck is to happen tomorrow. ‘Cause one thing about Piltover: they love to talk. Your nerves almost wither away with every pour of a new bottle, and new bartender makes. How did you get here?

It took one question for you to ask Sevika.

“You wanna go get drinks?” And yeah, you meant plural. Drinkssss

Even though Sevika has some council duties to attend to, she would rather drink with you than deal with tomorrow again. With the council constantly interrupting her, and her almost grabbing them by the neck. This is like a vacation that she hasn’t had since…

Well shit.

Anyway, at a booth, you’re both bent over holding your stomachs, softly sharing a touch here and there, laughing about how some of the councilors were feeling so screwed at the opera house. Their faces stretched in ways that could only say ‘this is catastrophic for us’ Making fun of their inner thoughts that you would make up, Sevika chiming in of what they really were thinking. The laughter dies out when another cup is sat in front of you, a single cherry margarita, with more alcohol stirred in at your request.

Sevika peers over at you, your face is still surprisingly well-kept after all these back to back glasses of your favorites. As many drinks as you had tonight, she’s surprised you can keep up with her. You raise your drink to your supple lips, pressing them against the glass, taking slow gulps, that red liquid soon being drained by your unsatisfied thirst. You were simply drinking and Sevika was just—- captivated by you. She took a long sigh, avoiding to look at you anymore than she has, taking interest in the ceiling, knowing damn well she would rather stare at your lips some more.

“Sorry for being.. an ass earlier” you admitted, your low lidded eyes fixated on the table, pursing your lips, thoughts swarming on how to say this the right way that it can reach Sevika, that you’re being genuine, that this isn’t scripted. She fixed her gaze back to your face again, thankful that she has an excuse to stare at you.

“I was-“

“Putting up a front? Yeah, not my first time seeing that.” She stepped in between your sentence, knowing you were probably going to make a long apology with the way your face was scrunched with guilt. Might as well let you know she doesn’t really care that you were trying to seem tough. It’s human.

However there is one thing that bothered her, and she’s not one to just let everything— slip away.

“You gaslit me.” She said as she took another sip of her negroni, not averting her locked in stare at you.. Thumbing her glass, feeling around the carefully crafted cup, ridges pressing her touch.

“I- wha?” You stumbled with your wording, voice coming out like a squeak. Fully turning your head towards her, giving her your undivided attention as your eyebrows knit together, but not from frustration, just taken aback. Her face meshed around by twisted emotions that she was not fond of being absorbed in, her lip was upturned, as if she wanted to snap at you for the memory.

“You said I was being cut throat, did you mean aggressive?” Her fleshed hand, combing through her hair back, slightly tugging at the ends, eyes half lidded. Sevika had to ask this because, this isn’t her first being… treated othered. She knows her appearance is often confused with just an embodiment of the aggressor, it pisses her off. She knows why she had to build up herself as this physical, and you know what? She likes it a lot(her muscular body that is). Her hard work, nobody can dismiss proof of it, yet, people see this brawny woman and think she can handle anything. She can handle MOST, things but, her upbringing is the reason she can deal with it, not because she looks like it, and definitely not because she wants to deal with it. She has to.

“I.. I meant direct, but— I am sorry that I did that. I.. there is no excuse for me when I said that to you. I hope you can forgive me.”

“Uh.. yeah.” She mumbled out, taking another sip from the large glass mug, her brows drew together, muddled in her thoughts. Not understanding why you apologized so easily. She shook her head, eyes wandering off away from you, staring at different people. The place was bustling, hot food coming from the kitchen, plates clattering together, and so much high energy of many conversations.

She opened her mouth to speak again,

“You’re really confusing.”

“Why do you say that?” You asked, tilting your head, still keeping your eyes on her, not thinking about how much she made you nervous earlier, the drinks are really settling in now.

“I thought you would go back n forth with me..”

“Not in the case of me being in the wrong.”

Sevika blinked twice, baffled that you’re saying something almost foreign to her. She whipped her head back to you, you were so close to her face, not even realizing that your chest was pressing against her bicep. She noticed though, losing her absolutely shit in her head, stiffening trying to make sure she doesn’t move, because one, she doesn’t want to make any sudden movements, and two she doesn’t want you to be uncomfortable with her if she did move back.

Maybe you’re used to doing this, or maybe you just feel comfortable that you’re in her presence. Sevika was dodging every possible hypothetical that was anything less tame.

“Thish is what I mean, we are so attached to them problems we’ve been festering in that we expect harm from anyone.”

You fumed, slurred wording, at the irresponsible acts of negligence that Zaunites endured, the fact that those very actions are still present is just infuriating, you took a deep breath, trying to calm down.

She gave you this lopsided grin, thinking to herself that, so it takes a few drinks to get your fire back?

“Being in the Council is hard.. isn’t it?” You inquired, inching closer to her. Eyes pooling with kindness.

Annnd we’re back to Sevika losing her marbles again, tits on her arm, soft as fuck, trying her best to be coherent, you were waiting for her response, and she’s trying to think of anything other than those tits.

She took a deep breath, and right at that moment, the drinks were settling in for her too. She wanted to get up, but she noticed her vision was a bit.. wobbly. Fuck, she was in a difficult situation. She closed her eyes, pinching the bridge of her nose.

Fuck it you’re both slightly fucked up on drinks, might as well get closer, doesn’t mean anything. Friends are this close anyway, who cares, fuck it all.

“I-I forgive you, and I— am having a rough time with the rest of the council. I can’t say this in public so.. do you mind?”

She sloped near enough against you to reach your ear, and you nod that it’s alright for her to use your lobe.

“I’m trying to pass this bill, something that we need in Zaun, more healthcare facilities, and more licensed doctors”

As she whispered, you could almost feel her lips touch you, her breath lighting up all your senses, were you thinking at all when you agreed to her whispering your ears? Of course not. You just signed up for lesbian panic full course ahead! Your body was getting warmer by the second, barely registering what she’s saying now.. hopefully she doesn’t bring this specific conversation again, cause you’d be fucked. Maybe.

Head spinning from her voice, spinning more than those drinks could ever, in fact, this might be the drink you were missing to satisfy that thirst you were looking for in all those emptied cups of booze.

“They’re in my way stopping me, telling me I’m worrying about nonsense. That there’s enough down there. They’re.. preventing me. Provoking me is more like it, but that’s the stress I’m-“

“Would you both like another drink?” a waiter asks, staring at your empty cups. Interrupting the hushed conversation, saving you but at the same time not?

She grunted in your ear, before moving away, your chest rose and fell, gradually quickening, you nodded at the waiter, you just needed one more, one more to move that feeling off of you.

It’s funny, you were just giving this woman a letter with a stained kiss on it to be a tease, and now you’re here on the receiving end, getting flustered. You were not planning on that at all. You admit, she is very attractive, but you also didn’t expect to actually be the one that’s wishy washy about whether you’d like more of her or step back. You figured a little flirting wouldn’t be that bad, but dammit, you are literally almost at the edge of your seat from this teetering emotion that wants a hold of you.

You haven’t had a crush since you were a child, so for it to wander its way trying to capture you in its clutches again, was startling.

-

The drinks kept piling up until Sevika had to stop you. You were throwing them back like they were just drinks of water out of nowhere. She felt like she needed to put a wall between you and the bar, bringing you outside, your breath puffing out clouds, welcoming the shivers from the crisp winds. Cooling down your rising heat, and your alcoholic buzz. You were sooo hot from all the drinks, legs wiggly, insisting Sevika you can go home in your non-sobered state, insisting that you were not drunk at all. That was far from the truth.

“You can’t go home like that.”

“And why not?” You inquired right back, pouting at her, with your hands on your hips, as if you were asserting dominance, over a battle that you wouldn’t win, at least not this battle of back n forth. She took a step close to you, staring down at your physique, carefully taking her time to trace every bit, legs barely being able to stand, hands fidgeting with your clothes, briefly passing your chest,( if she stared any longer it would be.. — she would feel all too guilty for even disrespecting your safety with her like that.) slowly coming up to your face, lips plumped from the alcohol gracing them, eyes dilated.

“You’re vulnerable”

“Where you sup-suppose I should go them?”

Your words coming out slurred, taking a step closer to Sevika, you could smell her scent of her tobacco, the alcohol you’ve both drunk prior, and something.. else.. oils? Oil colognes?

“My.. ugh, dammit.. you’re..” if you didn’t know any better the way she’s struggling to make a sentence, it would seem that she’s nervous, but you brush it off, thinking she’s a bit buzzed.

“You’re gonna have to stay the night with me, until, well you’re not this”

You take a long good stare at her.

“Fime!”

-

Sevika moved out of her place in Zaun, the walk to the council was just to fucking exasperating to put any more effort into. And with the money coming in easier, Councilman benefits, she figured why not get a place near it. However, she wouldn’t dare be too close to those noblemen, earls, dukes, viscounts, she’s good on that.

Instead she chose to live in the exact neighborhood that you both went to that jazz joint. The place where you felt a little easier to breathe.

You both enter the door, entering a dark hallway, until she starts lighting some of the lanterns, the warm light welcomes you. There may be papers sprawled out, some empty bottles of elixirs, tools, nuts, and bolts around the living area, but it’s quite nice. Not too fancy, and too run down. It looks like she had some time to put together a good space for herself.

Heavy boots making the floors creak, as Sevika heads towards a closet grabbing some pillows, and a blanket. You held your hands out waiting for her to give her the comfortable blankets, instead she threw them on the couch.

“Sho rude, I was going-“

“You’re sleeping on the bed, I’m sleeping on the couch.”

“Oh.”

She raises her eyebrow at you, you look disappointed.

“I .. I thought I was gonna sleep on the couch.”

“Why?”

“Well I’m a guest, plush ish your bed you should sleep in it.”

You give her this awkward smile, swaying back n’ forth, still buzzed on the way here.

“It’s alright, I don’t care. It’s just for the night anyway.”

Just for the night, damn. Wait, why am I saying damn, we didn’t do anything for me to stay for longer. Plus, I’m sure she doesn’t see me in that way. Not her. You were so adamant that there was no way in hell, that Sevika, who was known around Zaun to be around Babbettes, never settling down with anyone, having her goals set and locked for the rest of life. Assuming was more than what you were doing, fantasizing that she’s just not the kind of woman that would ever find herself in a situation where love was involved, love with another person. She was just another fan that liked your music, that was that.

You bit down on your bottom lip, nodding, making your way to her room until she realized something CRUCIAL, that’s in her bedroom. You see, Sevika is grown right? Why wouldn’t she have something adult in her own house?

It was too late. Before she could stop you, you saw it. A purple strap, sitting on her bed. On top of her fluffy white covers, your mouth was left agape, shocked to see it in your face just like that. And it’s big.. like queen size dildo big. Talk about sobering up quick!

Who the fuck was she stretching out with something like that?

She swiftly moved past you, grabbing it and throwing it into her personal closet.

“Forget you saw that.”

“S-Saw what?” You replied immediately, your ears being kidnapped by heat, hot as ever as she gazed at you, and your eyes darting everywhere but her.

“‘Night”

“G’night”

And that was that, she left the room. You had a date with that bed, and sleep was calling your name. As soon as you plopped down on her covers, her scent exploded in your nose, it was so addictive, wondering if whoever was lucky to have her scent up close and personal smelled this exact scent.. You had to stop.

I’m not a pervert right? Oh god… nope this is exactly what perverts do. Shit.

You closed your eyes tight trying to forget everything, but thinking back to her eyes tracing you, her lips, her breath on your ear, her hushed tone looping you around like her silked, voice with a hint of grate to it was your zero gravity, yet somehow pulling you too close for your own good. Tomorrow will be better, right?

-

The next morning Sevika's head was banging, hangovers are not ideal, so she made something to get it out of her, Soondubu, best hangover cure ever, the spice, savory goodness just hits just right on her tongue. And for the hell of it why don’t she just makes some for you, she has no idea if you’re gonna eat it… but— it wouldn’t hurt.

She hears her mail slot open, turning the heat on low before grabbing the newspaper. Her eyes widened at the headline.

‘Local uprising singer gets political backlash at opera house.’

“Fuck”

She kept reading cause apparently they didn’t just stop there. They even stalked the both of you going bar hopping.

‘Is she trying to smooth over her latest scandal with a fellow Zaunite? Is this woman trying to smooth it over with debauchery-‘

Sevika chokes on her spit reading that last sentence.

Are you fucking serious?

This gotta be a game of chess of some sort, this had never happened before. Why would they rush this story of all stories to be in the paper? It made no sense to Sevika at all, unless…

Her and that old woman councilor have been at odds for a while, ever since she got there, that old woman has been out to get her. Trying to find ways to get rid of Sevika out of the council. She’s always going on and on about how it’s unprecedented that a Zaunite has a seat, with an important title. Always starting shit with her, making sure that the other council members don’t vote with her on improving Zaun.

Sevika scrubs her hand down her face, annoyed with how far this woman is willing to go. It’s one thing to fuck with her at work, but now she’s not only fucking with her personal life, she’s bringing you in with the mess. She crumbles up the papers, throwing them in the trash. She does not want you to see that. You were already nervous yesterday, anxiety building up at the brim, and now this?

-

After eating her meal, taking a shower, brushing her teeth, getting ready to go to work, she never heard you get up at all. She heard murmurs, so she assumed you were still asleep. She checked if you were all good. You were more than good, especially by the drool you were leaving on her pillow, arm thrawled above your head, a sloppy sleeper. It made her chuckle to herself seeing how knocked out you were. She took a quick glance at her closet though.

The hell was I thinking, leaving that out?

Knowing fully damn well she wouldn’t give a damn who saw that, but who would have guessed one her favorite performers would be spending the night at her house, to sober up on top of that. Before officially leaving, she brought some towels out, leaving them on a nearby chair, if you wanted to freshen up before leaving.

-

Sevika took her seat at the cogged table, everyone mumbling between themselves, Shoola giving her a concerned look, and Sevika giving her an already knowing look right back.

“Let’s just address the elephant in the room then” Sevika announced towards the entire council, the mumbling stopped and the attention was at her presence.

“We can no longer be distracted at the fact of your insolent behavior, it’s putting a certain look on the council” the old woman chided.

“Council Sesban, we’ve all had rumors floating about us, it is not that immoral to have it now, nor does it affect us at all for that matter.” Without haste, directing her attention towards the old woman that has it out for Sevika, Councilor Shoola spoke defending Councilor Sevika.

“I was speaking to Miss Sevika.” Sesban retorted sharply. Sevika, wanted this ridiculous argument to be over and done with, her face washed with an already worn out state.

“My personal affairs, and the representation of this council are two separate entities. It's gossip, nothing more and nothing less.” She proclaimed in a flat tone.

“Yes, I must say this too shall pass, plus, I do not favor staying on this topic, let's get to work shall we?” Another Councilor detering the imbalanced conversation. That old woman grumbled to herself. While Sevika huffed out a quick laugh. Rightfully so.

One of the councilors ordered an Enforcer to pass around some papers, with fancy fonts, ready to be signed, amongst various pressing matters that the Council must answer for the citizens.

“Let’s continue with our discussion, prior to the bill that a lot of Zaunites have made their absolute most concern. Hospitals, and doctors are needed.” The councilor continued, trying his best to negate the tension in the air. Everyone could tell that it was going to be a long.. day. It was no secret that the Council had prejudice towards Zaunites; most of the requests are ignored, or swept away by loopholes that they crawl into instead of addressing the matter that should be solved. However, when it came to their health system, there was no loophole for them, there had to be a decision. Sevika made sure that any loophole was quickly, and strategically filled. Except one gap that is trying to creep open, by force. None other than Councilor Sesban, at fault for opening that gap, over and over again.

“The bunch of them are grouping up, and getting riled up again, I think we-“ another Councilor tries to elaborate, until..

“Well it’s no wonder they are.” Councilor Sesban began,

“Radicals becoming more rowdy!” She shouted, Sevika bouncing her leg, her body preparing for Sesbans explicit biases slapped against her, before deciding to correct her.

“There is nothing radical about wanting proper health care, Councilor Sesban.”

“Of course, you’d say that, we know what’s really going on here. In the past they were relying on shimmer, and now they want something stronger. You’re familiar with that drug Councilor Sevika? In fact you might as well be related as close as family members with those variants you so graciously took upon-“

Her voice was sharp, unrelenting on the matter of Sevika’s personal affairs again.

Sevika had to bite her tongue down before she really started going off on this woman, almost letting out a “bitch” past her teeth, wouldn’t regret it at all, however she knows she has to keep some kind of professionalism.

“Councilor Sesban!” Shoola exclaims, wishing she’d stop where she’s at, but Sesban stops for no one. Not even for her counterparts.

“Zaunites want something stronger, and shimmer isn’t doing the trick like it did before. They clearly don’t need any more unnecessary special treatment.” She finished her statement, a smug smile upturning her lips, as if she just won a medal for being petty.

“You’re right, Zaunites have been using shimmer, but only because of the negligence that your city made sure happen for generations. It makes sense that a community tried to at least have some sort of aid, accepting they were abandoned by their government. The very same government that had no choice but to place me at the seat to represent Zaun.” Sevika rebutted, tongue quick, and wits sharp to a T.

“Should I go further?”

“Actually don’t answer that, I will go further. Clean up your mess that you so graciously keep trying to pull the covers over.”

“And what of your mess?” Sesban countered,

“Obviously, your demagogue of a performer clearly wants to rile up Zaunites to attack us again, trying to act as if she’s inspiring them when in actuality she’s just some slut on the streets trying to muck up some attention for her car-“

Sevika clenched her fist, eyebrow twitching at the word slut, man she wished she could stuff a cork down her throat.

“Do you ever shut your mouth?”

“What in the actual fuck does that woman have to do with the crisis at hand?” Finally cursing, not being able to hold back anymore, though, she still held back, not getting out of seat, still trying her best as she could. Sesban getting up from her seat scooting in back in a brash way, her face contorted with fury.

This constant back and forth did not cease for at least an hour to the point where the rest of the Council had to stop the entire meeting, and try to start fresh the next day.

“We’ll come back to this… again. Councilor Sesban, and Councilor Sevika, I hope the both of you settle your differences soon.”

Lighting a cigar before opening her house door, breathing in the tabaco down her lungs, swirling in her body, untwisting her stressed knot that keeps finding itself tangled over and over again, only to be burned to truly be loose. That cigar looped its addicted trail around the air, hugging the once cleansed air from its absence. Not bothering to turn the lights on, she dragged her feet along the floorboards, her heavy boots making their announcement, without her sharing a single word. As she walked more into her house, glancing over at her kitchen rack, the dishes were clean, and the Soondubu was completely gone.

Good, she ate something before she left.

Heading towards her bedroom for solace. She opened her door to find the sheets neatly straightened up. A tickling smirk pulling the corner of her mouth. It’s weird, you only were there for a night, but every corner screams your touch. You gave off this seclouth spirit, that slow dance with hers, or maybe Sevika was just imagining it. She took a long drag of her cigar, breaking away from its taste for a second, she took a deep breath, your scent mixed with hers, it felt as though she was drinking in something extremely forbidden, stepping over lines that should never be crossed.

She was nearly about to fall asleep when she heard something moving in her bathroom. Without even thinking twice she swung the door open, ready to get rid of some random trespasser, and to her surprise it wasn’t

Well damn, it was you in all your glory. Her eyes nearly popping out of her skull, not expecting to see you still here. Definitely not expecting you to be damn near nude, in front of her, in her bathroom. Her hand that gripped that knob, grew tighter, if she wanted to, she could break it.

“Oh shit, wait!”, you were in the middle of wrapping your hair in a towel, with a quick swing of her slamming that door closed, her heart racing like a trapped hummingbird in a cage.

(Chibi version of Sevika’s reaction)

She took a large gulp, her back now facing the door, eyes flickering something dark trying to make room in her, yet she shot it down like a venomous snake.

Lace.. that was lace right? Her nip-. Fuck. She placed her fleshed hand on her chest, trying to do a breathing exercise, but nothing was working. That memory was circling an ablazed memory in the wrinkles of her brain. Refusing to be removed by any means, didn’t matter if she close her eyes, you were right there, didn’t matter if she thought of something else, you kept clawing at her, digging your nails deep inside her hot blood that protected her hippocampus, her red carpet of different lives she had made.

“Thought you went home!” She yelled, her voice coming out a bit more higher pitched than usual. It got a quirked eyebrow out of you, but of course you try to disregard that. Not even thinking that maybe she is shocked from seeing you in lingerie.

“Sorry!” She apologized, soon after, you almost opened the door, to tell her she doesn’t have to apologize, yet you remind yourself, you’re still undressed. And you really didn’t want to put back on your clothes that reeked of alcohol.

“No-no it- I’m sorry, I shoulda said something when you came back.”

“Why’re-“

“I saw that paper…” interrupting her, of course she’s surprised you’re still here, but after seeing that article about you. The column, gods, it was too much for you to just go back home, lock yourself in your own doors, instead you stayed at her home. Not waiting for her, just losing track of time as you kept taking cold showers to rid yourself of that consuming pit of your stomach.

Sevika, shutting her eyes tight, pinching her nose bridge, groaning softly to herself, cursing that she didn’t think that you would go through that.

Should’ve burned it.. Damn it all.

“Too scared to leave?” She questioned, her voice holding you close again.

“Yep!”

“I even heard the neighbors going on about it.”

Well fucking great, you both had a shittty day. Her metal claws scratch at the door, as she pondered on what to do about this entire fiasco. At first she figured this would all blow over in two weeks. However, with the way Sesban is so hellbent on removing her from the Council..

She licks her lips and lifts her eyes to the ceiling, she could hear you moving closer to the door, pressing yourself against it. You’re both entertwined in this farce, yet bound by a block that can only be moved if one of you is vulnerable enough to let it sway naturally.

“Y-you can.. stay as long as you’d like if you want.” She lets out, her mouth going dry.

“Oh!” You responded, shocked that she’d even let you stay longer. Especially, since the news thinks you’re just out to get your slap on the wrist by any means.

“I mean! I mean you don’t have to- I”

“I don’t want to take hostage of your bed longer than I have now-“ you reply, mouth moving in a brisker manner, still getting cut off by her persistence.

“It’s s’fine.”

“You sure?”

It wasn’t an unwelcomed persistence though, it was.. sugaring you up that she’s insisting. She even sounds a bit worried.

“Of course..” her voice coming out in a hushed whisper, soft as clouds easing your discomfort.

“Okay..” you said pressing a palm at the door, making lazy circles on it, as if your body knew that her back was on that door.

Previous|Next

[brie-is-cheesy]

I love Annabeth, and sure, she was emotional, but physical aggression shouldn’t be the first reaction when reuniting with your supposed soulmate. And it’s not the only time she reacts physically when upset.

It’s played off as a mix of emotions, but considering Percy had just been through hell(literally, almost) and had no control over his disappearance, it was a pretty aggressive way to handle things.

When Percy tells Annabeth that Rachel helped him navigate the Labyrinth, Annabeth straight-up punches him in the gut.

It’s clearly driven by jealousy, but resorting to physical violence just because she was upset about another girl? Not great.

Throughout the books, Annabeth frequently shoves or hits Percy when she’s annoyed, flustered, or frustrated. While it’s often framed as playful, it does happen often enough to be a pattern. And Percy doesn’t react that way even once.

Right before their Mark of Athena reunion, Annabeth is so mad at Percy for disappearing(even though it wasn’t his fault) that she says she might “throw him into the sea and see if he can still breathe underwater.” This is meant to be playful frustration, but it again plays into her tendency to use aggression as an emotional outlet.

While none of these moments on their own make their relationship inherently toxic, they do point to a pattern where Annabeth’s first response to intense emotions is often physical. That’s a red flag if I’ve ever seen one. If the roles were reversed, people would call out Percy for it.

@shewas-afairy we can have a friendly debate on it if you’d like because at the end of the day it IS just fictional characters and their flaws are oftentimes what makes us like them even more :>

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: If you think that Percabeth is toxic because Annabeth judo flipped Percy when she saw him again, that is a TERRIBLE argument. Might I remind you, Percy disappeared with the curse of Achilles. He literally COULD NOT BE HURT. And Annabeth had no way of knowing the curse was gone, so to her, she wouldn’t have caused any damage. Plus, those two are veterans of war. One judo flip wouldn’t have hurt them. Percy LAUGHED after he was flipped. He was clearly ok with it. For all we know the judo flipping could have been some sort of game or tradition between the two of them before Percy was kidnapped. So NO. Annabeth is not abusive simply because she judo flipped Percy.

[azaharinflames]

"Tim does love to mention Eddie and we've already seen he loves shipbaiting." - It really gets annoying, but I'm not surprised he isn't clear about it, like Aisha was. I think he still seems to think that the show would fall apart if he outright says Bvddie won't happen. I want to be like other BuckTommy fans, saying that it couldn't be more clear, but I just don't like that Eddie is once again a topic. I know lots of BuckTommy fans say it was necessary to put a stop to it, but somehow it just made me mad, because I don't trust Tim.

"I love Maddie Han (Buckley) but like… some of her scenes this season have me questioning my love for her. Like. She could do better. " - That's another thing. She always says this weird things to Buck, like she doesn't know her brother at all, like in 7x4, where she implied she wouldn't put it past him to hook up with a married woman.

Hi, Nonnie!

I do agree that it does feel like Tim is a bit too afraid to fully kill Buddie. Tbh I took this as 'have them write fanfiction' (paraphrasing) 2.0, but I can also see how frustrating it is, for everyone really. He doesn't want to lose that uncertainty, even tho he made sure to kill the possibility of Buddie in the show.

Here is what I think: he deliberately sent that message to Buddies to play with them and keep them engaged, even when he knows he doesn't have any intention of following through. Interviews are not something the GA reads - it is, however, something the Buddies do read to try to find 'hidden' messages and clues. Tim is aware of this and decided to play with them. But, at the end of the day? What is important is what we see on screen. And he was very clear with that.

I do understand you being mad at this, though, don't think I'm not. It is frustrating, and maddening. And I seriously hope that the show takes the chance, reconciles Bucktommy, and stops bringing Eddie as any point of contention between them. So the audience knows, ofc, but also to stop the baiting.

I've been saying it, but it does feel like the writers don't know how to write the dynamics of the 118 anymore. We haven't had a good-feel scene with them in a long time, they for some reason feel like co-workers and not family, and that extends to Maddie, too. Her scenes with Buck have been, at best, odd. Their sibling dynamic is there still, but different, and not necessarily in a good way.

My inbox is open for ranting, venting, giving your opinion (unpopular or popular, I'm happy to receive and discuss both), and even confessions! Though if you don't want yours posted, please make sure to say :)

Take care <3

[littelovelunette]

hey so can you do like shizcophrenic FEM! reader x sevika or vi head cannons?

i really love how you do your head cannons and writing so keep up the good work! (you don't have to do it, it just kinda popped up in my head)

Headcanons (Ft. Sevika & Violet)

This feels personal.

Contains intense schizophrenia, hallucinations, suicidal behaviour, violence

Schizophrenic!Reader

Sevika

Although it's frustrating for Sevika to not know what to do or how to help, she never leaves despite her anger at the circumstance

Would hold a Piltie therapist at gunpoint to help you cope with schizophrenia

Has done it

Often reassures you the people you see, the hallucinations, they're not really there with a flesh arm wrapped around you

Heart breaks seeing you suffer the way you do but she never lets it show she has to be strong for you or you'll fall apart

Learns to distinguish whenever you're spiralling and most of the times she waits and sees whether you can handle yourself or not— if it gets too bad, she intervenes

Tries to understand Jinx better because of the similarities

"They're not here, just me." She pulls you closer and rests her sleep clouded head on top of yours

Handcuffs are always in her drawers. If you act suicidal because of the voices in your head, she cuffs you to the headboard of the bed.

You scream and flail, pull at the cuffs and sob but Sevika knows she has to endure it if she wants you safe. She's scared of losing you to you

Mutters silent apologies as she watches you struggle, smoking in a corner of the room

When you're asleep she says, "I wish there was more I could do for you. I really do. Because whenever I see you having an episode it seems like you die inside, little by little."

Someone tries a jab at you, calls you insane and she's already breathing down his neck, choking him until she can hear his neck crack. "Say that again." Her mechanical fingers dig deep and blood seeps down his now dead, motionless body.

"What if you're also a hallucination?" Sevika's heartbreaks when you say that but she doesn't cry. She doesn't try to convince you otherwise. She just grabs you and hugs you— some nights you struggle against it, slap her, scratch her but she doesn't care. She's desperate to hold onto the last strands of your sanity.

Some nights you wake and try to flee from Sevika because the voices in your head convince you, she's gonna hurt you.

But the cuffs jingle against your wrist and you see Sevika has you cuffed to her own flesh wrist

Violet

Doesn't baby you around during your episode she gives you a grounding hug and reminds you that you're alright with her

It hits her like PTSD because she's witnessed her sister have the same thing

Mad at the situation because she can't punch her way out of it

"Are you real?" You ask and Vi swore she felt her heart stop for a second. With a shaky hand, she take yours and presses it onto her chest as if trying to convince herself that you can still feel the steady beat of her heart. "Still here." She whispers

You get overwhelmed and you hit her, she dodges them and hugs you tightly

Vi never hits back, she loves you way too much and she wont even be mad at you for it

Keeps you distracted most of the times even if it's the most tedious things to do like fetching her a glass of water, passing a screwdriver, counting the tiles— anything that keeps your mind off of what the voices in your head tell you to do

Your first attempt was enough of a message for Vi to grasp. After that, she's stuck to you like superglue

Eyes soften when it's you and it's noticeable too

You tell her you're a burden and Vi's already pulling you in for a movie night, self care/spa day, taking you out for dinner. She tells you, "I love you too much for that to ever happen."

"Please. Stay. If you lose it, I'll die." She whispers when you're asleep.

Never tells you all those when you're awake because she's scared you'll feel like she's guilt tripping you with the amount of overthinking you do

"You ain't fighting this shit alone, got it?"

[mixelation]

Hi ✋ love all your stories. Just wanna ask if you have any opinion about Boruto series?

Hello! Thank you!! As for Boruto: ooooh man.....

So, I will say that I really liked the mini sequel manga with Sarada. There are some aspects of it I don't really like (I'm in denial that Uchiha Shin exists, for example), but I really liked Sarada as a main character and the emotional through-line of it. I liked the potential of Dadsuke, I liked Naruto taking the time to mentor random young shinobi that followed him out of the village, I liked her friendship with Chouchou, I liked the narrative choice of her awakening her sharingan "through love" as a follow-up to the themes of the main series. I read some of the Boruto manga and watched the first arc of the anime because I wanted to learn more about Sarada. I do occasionally look up content about her because I think there's a lot of potential there.

Boruto (the series) has......... strong "filler arc" vibes. A lot of the new world building feels out of nowhere, weak, and kind of stupid. Like many people, I don't like the direction Naruto as a character was taken, and on top of that the SasuSaku interactions often feel like one of those fanfics that just hates Sakura. Instead of coming up with challenges the adult cast couldn't just solve in a second with their ninja skills* in order to give the new generation room to grow, the plot often takes the route of "all your OG series faves are just kind of bad at being a ninja now" and it's frustrating and feels kind of dumb. I don't mind Boruto (the character), but I don't really think he's as compelling a lead as Sarada, especially when a lot of his character depends on Naruto's character assassination, and I wasn't super impressed with the way Sarada was handled.

*This could be like, figuring out a way to isolate the kids from their parents somehow, or better choreographing or moving plot pieces so we see cool, god-level Team 7 fights while the kids have to deal with their own challenges.

For positives, I liked Mitsuki and Orochimaru's evil soccer mom glow up. Some of Boruto's classmates are fun (although rarely are they interesting). For example, I liked how that one girl summoned a giant demon creature during her villain era, and then she got to keep a cute mini version of it as a summons post talk-no-jutsu. I like the concept of Karin with an undercut.

Every once in a while someone tells me about what happens after I stopped watching, and it largely sounds deeply cursed and/or completely off the wall. Sometimes so cursed that I kind of feel like watching it (like Sasuke has a tree clone????). However at no point have I thought, "That sounds awesome, I definitely have to go look that up!"

[districtunrest]

ONGOMGOMGOMG. (share thoughts. any n all. you know i need to know. PLEASE!)

HAHA sorry. anyway:

I didn’t really like it and I’m sad about it. ☹️ even though there were some interesting ideas and cool new characters, I was taken out of the story too much to fully enjoy them. it read to me like the laziest (most rushed? least edited?) yet most forced storytelling of the series, which sucks bc it’s supposedly the REAL backstory of my favorite character. but I just couldn’t shake my doubt while reading that this was what we and Katniss were missing all along. too many details (that I memorized by heart as a tween and have made everyone’s problem since) didn't match up, even with the card-stacking*. so I just don't believe this was always the intended ‘real’ story when it’s so hidden from the trilogy... imo, SC went back to it with a mission statement in mind after recent current events (and, more tellingly, after Ballad) and did her thing. which is fine, that's her right - it's just, when this whole book seems more like a writing workshop thought experiment than the intended backstory, I will treat it as such. bc as it stands, all the callbacks & connections & Everlark parallels in the world cannot replace Katniss & Peeta watching the highlight tape of his Games, Haymitch telling them what he did was “almost but not quite” as bad as them with the berries, Katniss finally understanding who he is in that moment, and Haymitch later admitting the loss of his loved ones were because of "that stunt [he] pulled with the forcefield" (which is. simply not true anymore with all of his stunts in and out of the arena). like say no more, that’s good enough for me! it’s what I prefer and what I find more compelling than what’s revealed/subverted in Sunrise. and tbh that discrepancy makes Sunrise unfaithful, at least in my eyes, for all it relies on references to the rest of the series. 

now, obviously I had mixed feelings about this prequel in the first place, and my concerns/reservations mounted with each excerpt, only to be confirmed now... but I did try, okay!?? haha I’d told you and several others privately that I really wanted to like this book and I was willing to set aside my gripes if it was good - but it had to actually be good! instead, the book was exactly what I was afraid it was going to be *and* suffered a drop in quality. I found the narration underwhelming, dumbed down and repetitive, and not evocative of Haymitch's voice. even things I thought there was NO WAY would actually happen and I was just being paranoid - but then they did, lmao. like, it was a letdown for me personally *and* it didn’t even do it well enough where I could at least respect it and oblige, lol

overall, it was just too off for me. by answering and explaining so much, it ended up taking away a lot of the trilogy's charm and intrigue - and did so in a way that left a bad taste in my mouth. it made me view Ballad in a more negative light, too, tbh. so I think going forward I’ll just consider it a weird spinoff that is secondary to the main/trilogy canon. 🤷🏻‍♀️

(some more Haybitching under the cut)

tbh, what guts me the most is what SC chose to do with Haymitch’s voice & character, where she watered him down to what he needed to be for this lesson & this plot. it’s frustrating that the dangerous, cunning, arrogant boy that Katniss sees in the highlight reel and can easily recognize in adult Haymitch is all an act. the character we thought we knew is not present here, sacrificed to make yet another point about propaganda, and that’s a crying shame. and his deterioration in the final chapters is so underwhelming (as are the death scenes 🫣) - I've read that same story countless times but told better by people who love the character as is and weren't on a time crunch for a movie deal, I guess.

Sunrise!Haymitch skews shockingly immature and moralistic and hates the idea of being a sarcastic, selfish “rascal." but since when are we calling surviving and fighting to get home in an unthinkable situation selfish? that’s now assumed in Sunrise’s logic, where instead having a ginormous alliance against the Careers with no exit plan (big ‘WHAT IF ALL THE TRIBUTES BANDED TOGETHER AND DIDN’T FIGHT?’ energy) is much smarter and nobler than going it alone and heading in one direction to get to the edge for no reason other than bc nobody had tried it before and trilogy!Haymitch, we know, is an out-of-box thinker & strategist. I know he & Ambert were operating under the notion that they were going to lose no matter what and had their own plans (which. hmm) but it was just so oddly accepted by the Newcomers, too, who had no such threat from Snow. they were so willing to be selfless martyrs and band together when they all know at the end of the day there can only be one survivor - which was heartening in a way, sure, but it almost seemed trite? and again, needlessly moralistic in an established world like Panem, where these things happen every year...? not even self-righteous (Katniss' words but with Haymitch's backing!) Peeta 'not a piece in their games' Mellark thought so narrowly. Idk. I might have to mull that one over more. but anyway, then Haymitch trying to rescue Maysilee is turned into a mini redemption arc in post, when all it was in the first place was a glimpse into his protective & caring nature underneath all the bravado, which was surely part of Katniss’ deepening understanding of him. but Sunrise wasn’t interested in exploring that, either, or even honoring it. okay

and I can’t get over how SC had to kind of retcon the final pages of Mockingjay to fit Haymitch’s epilogue into it, which didn’t help how it already rang so hollow for me, I hate to say. it’s not even done well, containing the most rushed, wrap-up-everything-before-the-deadline writing I’ve ever seen from SC (and it STILL doesn’t read like Haymitch’s voice to me :/). some things can just be; they don’t need some big, loaded, tragic explanation. Haymitch can glibly call Katniss ‘sweetheart’ once, bc she’s been sullen & hostile to him and he is in fact sarcastic (the horror!), only for it to go on to become an actual term of endearment by the end - like, that’s lovely in and of itself. why weigh it down further? who asked for that? I know I didn’t. 

most insignificantly & pettily of all: geese do mate for life - as in monogamously, meaning they stay together until one of them dies. then, they mourn and find another mate. just putting that out there, lmao

*how tf was Haymitch able to kiss his token and set up a bomb and throw it over the edge and put his token back when we know he was convulsing from shock by the end? to where Silka was able to start staunching her wound as she waited for him to die? if him going into shock was taken from footage anytime after, the arena would've been quaking/on fire around him?? Idk fam. it just feels off.

[boyapologist]

like genuinely imagine cutting off a song about how you'd fight dragons with your fans and how they were genuinely a essential part of getting you to where you are now, to make space for a song where you tell them to go fuck themselves because they hate your racist boyfriend. something went so wrong along the way of the past couple of years in taylor's brain like I genuinely cannot recognize her any more lmao

[thebigqueer]

literally having the worst day ever and i cant ever be happy (has only experienced minor inconveniences today but they keep adding up)

[ouroborosorder]

I have now seen episode 8 of girls band cry

you ever see an episode of tv that hits so hard you have to pause it and lay down on the floor for a while?

[natjennie]

grrrrrrr

[aparticularbandit]

Thinking about how Haruhi absolutely screwed over Asakura.

Because like.

Haruhi makes the club. The club goes looking for trouble and finds nothing and also the straws were not in her favor and she didn't get to go looking for trouble with Kyon.

Haruhi gets depressed because nothing has happened in the club in its one week of existence.

Five minutes later, Asakura: Hey. Kyon. Let's play stabby!

One day later, Haruhi: HEY KYON ASAKURA DISAPPEARED YOU AND ME GONNA TEAM UP AND LOOK FOR TROUBLE.

And like. Asakura is stated repeatedly to be the prettiest girl in their class other than maybe Haruhi, and Haruhi can't go after Mikuru because Mikuru's part of her gang.

What I'm saying is Asakura suddenly being stabby is entirely Haruhi's fault.

....

And, as a result, it is highly likely that Yasuke should be concerned.

[justworthlessreblogs]

i think i've finally settled on my feelings on ciel as a character which is that the writers kinda fucked her over. i don't hate her but i do hate how she was utilized after 23 (which is to say... not really all that much?)