#and it’s so difficult to communicate properly cos i feel like it just doesn’t help it just makes me feel crazy and toxic

[graevs666]

idk it’s just scary telling ppl when ur upset/annoyed/triggered etc bc i don’t want them to be mad at me or think I’m being toxic and weird, or to be the cause of a huge conflict. i feel like deep down it’s my fault for being upset etc bc i feel like im being unreasonable and sensitive…

[scleracentipede]

I don't know much about DID, so this is very interesting for me to learn about!

Question: is Batman aware of Jon's DID? If so, is he able to recognize the alters and switches, and does he interact with each of them differently?

I’m glad my silly little au is proving educational 🥰 if you ever have any DID related question you can always dm us we’re always happy to help people learn more

So: Is Batman aware of Scarecrows DID?

Yes absolutely - he already knew about DID/OSDD from being friends with Harvey and Co. (who I hc as being an OSDD system and knowing before becoming a villain) before he meet Scarecrow (well meet him properly, they’d crossed paths before either had donned their masks) so already knew a lot more then most and is a true ally to the DID/OSDD community.

Our Bat is much more of a caring figure I suppose who makes an effort to know what health things his Rogues has going on not to use against them but so he can avoid hurting them too much (e.g., he’d never kick Jon’s bad leg in a fight) so he knows about their DID.

The real question is does Batman know about his own plurality 👀

Can he recognise whose fronting and does he interact with them all differently? (Going out a read more so this isn’t too long for those who are just scrolling by)

Can he recognise them all?

Sometimes - there are little clues and habits they all have that he usually to differentiate them all (eg. If there’s singing he knows it’s going to be The Hessian and that he will likely get a little kiss) but he doesn’t get to spend as much time with them all as say Edward (whose the best at telling, as he likes to boast) so doesn’t always know for sure or immediately.

How he interacts with Hessian:

- Like I said he’s likely to get a kiss from Hessian along with a “We’re not so different you and I” speech

- Hessian is the most difficult for him to fight in some ways: more reckless, masochist so enjoys getting hit back, most likely to bite, hard to focus on fighting when someone moans when you hit them etc.

- But equally Hessian is easiest to get monologuing and to distract (not as single minded as Jonathan)

- He still tries to pull his punches despite Hessians ferocity as he knows it’s still just sick and scared really

- He has sympathy for them all but Hessian’s speech’s hurt his heart because he can see the pain behind them

- He has truly feared that he would die when fighting Hessian before

How he interacts with Jonathan:

- Opposite to last Hessian point: he has truly feared that he would kill Jonathan before

-Jonathan is painfully excellent at pushing his buttons and getting under his skin with surgical precision

-He truly cares for him and wants to help all the same

-He sees Jonathan’s obsession with fear and power like an addiction and he’s not wrong

- When not fighting (basically when he isn’t between Jonathan and his goal) he finds Jonathan very pleasant and interesting to talk.

-The conflict between him and Jonathan is completely impersonal to Jonathan despite how precisely he hurts Bruce, it’s all just work for Jonathan

-This drives Bruce mad and intrigues him at the same time: after all is he any different to Jon in his pursuit of his own goal?

- He seems himself in them all but especially Jonathan. In another he could be the same if he didn’t have the family he feels so lucky to have

- He thinks in another life they could have been good friends and maybe even worked to do good for the world (whatever that actually means)

- They are mirrors essentially- Narcissus and his reflection in the lake

- He worries that Jonathan single minded focus will kill them all

How he interacts with Raven

- She is the one in their system he can bargain with

-If he needs their help with something he’ll usually try to appeal to her if he can

-She claims to not hold any stakes in his “childish games” with the others

-Other than that shes very cold towards him

- They rarely interact outside of this

How does he interact with Keeny

- Keeny makes him so very sad

- Once again mirrors and all: sees his own hurt inner child pain, sees his own children’s pain, the Scarecrow system and other the Rogues’ childhood pain reflect in that sad little.

- He’s held Keeny through panic attacks and flashbacks many a time when a hit during a fight has landed just wrong or a fear toxin canister has burst bought him to the front

- All the Batfamily GCPD and the Rogues know when Keeny fronts all fighting is to stop when Batman is around

-Really activates his paternal instincts

-He’ll never raise a hand or let a hand be raised to Keeny (they are just a child after all)

- He just wants her to be okay

[atlanticcanada]

Maritimers react to report that calls for greater competition in the grocery industry

There was a full house Tuesday for the free community lunch at Dartmouth non-profit The North Grove — a regular occurrence these days due to the high cost of food.

“Right now the reason is people don't have adequate access to affordable food,” says Wendy Fraser, executive director of the Dartmouth-based non-profit.

Fraser says attendance at its community meals has increased 45 per cent year over year.

As well, North Grove’s food trading program was visited a record 143 times in May, which is an almost 200 per cent increase from December.

“Food prices are not manageable,” Fraser says.

“At the end of the day, I don’t feel like this is a food insecurity problem, it’s a poverty problem, and as long as people are living on an extremely limited income with no increases…. then people are being left further and further behind.”

For Dartmouth resident Troy Pallo, the services at The North Grove, including its community garden, are essential at a time when living on a fixed income means making difficult spending decisions.

“We sort of have to give and take,” says Pallo, who lives on disability.

When asked what he would like to see to make a difference, he says he has a few ideas.

“We need competition so they can bring down (food) prices,” he says, “or either raise the disability to come up above poverty and inflation.”

In a highly-anticipated report released Tuesday the Competition Bureau agrees that Canada’s concentrated grocery industry, dominated by a handful of corporate players, plays a part in the rising cost of food.

“Without changes in the competitive landscape, Canadians will not be able to fully benefit from competitive prices and product choices,” the report reads.

“The report states the obvious, we need more competition, but how do we get there?” asks Sylvain Charlebois, director of the Agri-Food Analytics Lab at Dalhousie University.

The Bureau’s recommendations for all levels of government include creating a national strategy to support new types of grocery businesses, introducing unit pricing requirements, and limiting a company's ability to shutout potential competitors by buying up neighboring real estate.

“Some companies buy land and leave it empty just to make sure the competition doesn't build another store right across the street,” Charlebois says.

But the report fails to address an even larger issue, he says.

“The food industry in Canada has a price fixing culture,” says Charlebois. “And there are emails out there now that suggest that more verticals than bread have been impacted by price fixing, so that’s the big elephant in the room that is not properly addressed in the report.”

“Instead of relying on companies coming forward with admissions,” he adds, “perhaps it’s time (for the Competition Bureau) to go after criminals…. Consumer trust is being impacted by that.”

The report also calls for more government support for independent grocers.

The co-owner of Dartmouth’s Gateway Meat Market agrees.

Tamara Selig says what her business needs right now is municipal support to expand the business and meet the demand for affordable groceries.

“As far as being able to get building permits pushed through a little bit faster, or just having less hoops to go through would be helpful,” Selig says.

“Something has to happen, the prices of groceries have been going crazy and we’ve seen that demand where people are coming to us now,” she says.

“Competition is necessary…(consumers) might not have access to come to us or go to other options. A lot of times in the communities they live in, (the big grocers are) their only choice, so competition is not a bad thing,” she explains.

The Bureau plans to check back on whether there has been progress made on its recommendations in three years.

In the meantime, shoppers continue to find savings wherever they can.

“Prices are too high and these big companies are just sucking up everything,” says shopper James Kearsley, who came from the Annapolis Valley into Dartmouth to shop at Selig’s store.

“We gotta eat, we gotta buy food,” he says, “we don't have a choice.”

For more Nova Scotia news visit our dedicated provincial page.

from CTV News - Atlantic https://ift.tt/W0FRgkE

[sadviper]

Woo Do Hwan: Interview with Kankoku TV Drama vol. 97 (Aug 2020)

Once again, much thanks to @staidwaters​ for graciously reviewing and correcting!!! This was a really hefty interview, hope you enjoy~

-------------

Woo Do Hwan

Sword, bow, and horseback riding for the first time

A “Monstrous Newcomer” in a career-making, historical drama debut

In 2016, in the movie “Master”, Woo Do Hwan played the role of Lee Byung Hyun’s subordinate. Even though he appeared onscreen for just three minutes, he left a strong impression, attracting attention. Since then, he starred in “Save Me” (2017 OCN), taking on the nickname of “Monstrous Newcomer” and setting out on a brilliant career path. The next step he takes will be his first historical drama “My Country” (2019 JTBC).

Tackling a historical drama is an ideal chance for young and promising actors to grow; they have a rare chance to study in depth with multiple superb veteran actors over the long filming period. Woo Do Hwan did not miss this opportunity. His new work “The King: Eternal Monarch” (2020 SBS) leverages 120% of what he learned from “My Country”, and his popularity is surging.

Struck by a midwinter waterfall, the most dreadful and frigid opportunity to showcase yourself

--What kind of work is ”My Country”?

WDH: Each of the characters clash with the others for the sake of their personal convictions. This drama depicts their love and friendships. The country they are each reaching for … in a way, you could say they seek the same goal. Everyone wants a country in which they can live happily, but each person has a different path to that goal. This work skillfully depicts the conflicts that arise in the midst of this.

--Please introduce the role that you play.

WDH: Nam Seon-ho is an illegitimate child born to a family of nobles (yanban), and he has suffered greatly because of his birth. The poor guy is only able to relax his guard and laugh when he is with Seo Hwi (played by Yang Se Jong) and his younger sister Yeon (played by Jo Yi Hyun). However, even under such circumstances, he holds onto his ambitions. He doesn’t want other people to experience the same kind of pain that he has endured, so he strives to become the right-hand man of Yi Seong-gye (played by Kim Young-cheol), the future founder and king of the Joseon Dynasty. However, it doesn’t go as expected and I end up in opposition to Hwi, my dearest friend.

--What things did you pay attention to when creating the role?

WDH: Since it’s a period drama, it was difficult to get used to the way of speaking and tone of voice. It took me a while to get the hang of it. Now  I have the opposite problem, I’m doing my best to shake off the historical tone (laughs).

--The gorgeous hairstyles and clothing were a sight to behold.

WDH: Honestly, at first I thought “Long hair probably won’t suit me…” (laugh). So early on, I participated in many concept meetings and tried out different hairstyles. Even with long hair, there are many different hairstyles that can be made, such as wearing with armor or tying it up. I collaborated with the director to choose the most suitable style according to the situation in the drama. I was able to try on as many outfits as hairstyles, but I really enjoyed being  able to wear the special costumes such as the armor and the inspector’s garments; things we normally don’t get the chance to wear.

--How did you practice horseback riding, swordsmanship, and archery?

WDH: Before filming started, I studied martial arts for about two months. Filming lasted nine months, so in total I was focused on this work for a whole year. While filming action, it’s important to skillfully capture the scene, but the most essential thing is to not to get hurt. For that reason, the cinematographer, my co-stars, and I always had to be in perfect sync. It took time to match movements for the sword fights.

--You became the topic of much discussion when you revealed your magnificent physique in a waterfall during the opening of the drama. What are your secrets for managing your fitness?

WDH: I train on a regular basis. If I only started working out when I knew there were going to be scenes with skin showing, it’d be stressful trying to build up my body in a short period of time for shooting. After all, I don’t know when or where I will have to strip down for a scene! (laugh) Usually I play a lot of soccer, and I’ll go to the gym to train if I have time. If I take care of myself properly as a habit, then I don’t need to worry if my body looks good or if I should put in more effort during acting; I can just concentrate on my performance.

--Was the director’s reaction a good one?

WDH: He was extremely happy, hahaha. They keep trying to make me take my clothes off, so I was like, “Come on, give me a break!” The road to the filming location for the waterfall scene was rugged and steep and it was incredibly cold; it was the most difficult scene. Se-jong even said “I never want to go into water that cold again”.

--A lot of viewers said that “Nam Seon-ho is the most pitiful man in the world.” How do you personally feel?

WDH: I wanted to present Seon-ho as a tragic figure, so I was glad that the audience saw him the same way; it encouraged me to put in even more effort and I worked hard to build up his character. Seon-ho constantly stands on the boundary between life and death, living a life where he might die at any moment. He never manages to accomplish any of his dreams, and it is only at the very end that he realizes what is most precious to him. However, even though Seon-ho is a tragic character, if we just focused on the sadness the drama would be hard to watch and it wouldn’t be interesting at all. Therefore I wanted to show many things with him, such as him being a powerful figure, and the loneliness his power hides.

He was able to finish the drama because he was with Se-jong, his co-star of the same age.

--At what points did you sympathize with Seon-ho?

WDH: There is always a conflict in Seon-ho’s life in that he always has to sacrifice something in order to get something he wants. Seon-ho’s situation is an extreme case, of course, but I think that in our lives there are many moments like his, even if they are small and trivial. Moments when we desire what we can’t have, or throw away things we shouldn’t throw away. There are also moments when we all have to give something up for the sake of a goal that we are reaching for.  In the midst of that, I worried about the things that I should protect, so I deeply sympathized with Seon-ho, whose ideals and emotions were in conflict with each other.

--Your portrayal of the character’s emotions was well-received. When was Seon-ho the most emotional?

WDH: It would be when he heard that Seo Hwi was alive. I had a deep rapport with Se-jong in all my scenes with him. From a certain point onwards, the events in the drama truly felt real, and I fell more and more in love with Se-jong (laugh). I deeply empathized with Seon-ho’s emotions, which made me want to perform even more intensely in this work.

--Concerning expressing emotions, are you the type to do a lot of preparation beforehand? Or are you the type to perform what you feel on the spot?

WDH: I think I am half-and-half. Beforehand, I’ll think, “So we’re filming this kind of scene today”,  why is this happening, and what was the situation before this scene? However, it’s difficult to continuously hold onto emotions because there are rehearsals and blocking out our positions with the director. So I will concentrate on creating the emotion in the moment when acting.

--And what about your mutually dependent relationship with Yang Se-jong, who played the role of Seo Hwi?

WDH: I believe it would have been very difficult if Se-jong hadn’t been there. I relied on him a lot. The make-up room was set up in a large van onsite, and while our hair was being done, we would go over our lines. If one person said their lines, then the other person would just naturally respond with their own lines. We are the same age, not just in the drama but also in real life, so in both the Goryeo and modern eras, we were always communicating well, back and forth.

Se-jong always helped me, and even though we were together on location for very long periods of time, not once did we fight or have a conflict of opinion. We spent our time together as good friends, always being considerate of each other.

--There were many scenes of Seon-ho and Hwi’s friendship that brought out tears, but was there a particular scene where you especially felt the friendship between the two?

WDH: All those scenes where we rescued each other. Especially that scene in the latter half, where Hwi took Seon-ho out of Yi Bang-won’s (played by Jang Hyuk) house; that was memorable. Then in the first half, during the massacre of the Liaodong Punitive Expedition advance party, there’s a scene where we cross swords in the midst of combat and I recognize my dear friend Hwi. That scene was very good and had a big impact.

--What is your impression of Seolhyun (AOA) as Han Hee-jae?

WDH: Seolhyun was truly a “celebrity” to me (laugh). She is one of Korea’s top idols; I’ve seen her movies. When I heard that she would be co-starring with me, I was very much looking forward to it. Once we were actually performing together, I was amazed that her acting was even better than I expected. Seolhyun was the youngest on location, but she had a very mature attitude during filming. In front of a large crowd of her seniors, she played a bold and strong woman. I was impressed.

--The antagonism between Seon-ho and his father was one of the highlights of the drama. How was it like to co-star with Ahn Nae-sang, who played the role of your father?

WDH: Ahn Nae-sang sunbae was like a real father, a very interesting person. Although he’d say “Seon-ho is an impertinent son” (laugh), he worked well with me, and did a lot for me. During breaks, he tells jokes and lightens the atmosphere on set, but once filming starts, his gaze radically changes and he becomes a terrifying father. He’s not someone who hands out advice left and right to juniors, rather, he is a person who reacts kindly and looks after us. 

Extremely jealous of Se-jong’s Japanese fanmeet

--What are your thoughts on successfully wrapping up your first historical drama?

WDH: I wore hanbok, long wigs, and armor--I got to experience all of these things for the first time. I’ve also never done things like swordsmanship, archery, or horseback riding, so each one of those was a new challenge. Because I have never lived in that time period, I worried about how I should portray it. Despite that, I enjoyed everything. The remote locations that I visited were very beautiful, and during breaks it was a wonderful experience to enjoy the scenery and watch the seasons change instead of sitting in the dressing room. I’ve heard from my seniors that once you’ve done one historical drama, you’ll want to do another, and now I know what that feeling is like for myself.

--What was the most memorable location?

WDH: In the opening scenes, I often went to the countryside, but first I filmed the waterfall scene and the cliff scene. That cliff scene was absolutely terrifying. I scaled the cliff and did the action scene, but I thought...I might actually die if I fall (strained laugh).

--Watching the behind-the-scenes footage, you seem the quiet type but at the Japanese fanmeeting, I feel that you were skilled at speaking onstage. What is your actual personality?

WDH: Do I look like someone who doesn’t say much? I’m definitely not the talkative type, though. Hahaha. I talk a lot when I’m with Se-jong, but the interesting thing is, how much Se-jong and I will say changes depending on the day. On some days Se-jong speaks more than I do, and on other days I won’t shut up (laugh).

--Since filming continued for about a year, was it difficult to break free from the role of Seon-ho?

WDH: Honestly, I wouldn’t have thought about Seon-ho without today’s interview. However, Seon-ho’s sword is in my living room, so whenever I see it, I’m going to remember (laugh). But because I can’t use historical speech in the drama that I’m currently filming, I try to forget as much as possible.

--Currently you’re in the middle of filming the drama “The King”, right?

WDH: In “The King”, one person plays two different roles. The show depicts parallel worlds. In one world, Lee Min-ho sunbae plays the emperor and my character, Jo Yeong, has been by the emperor’s side since childhood and is the captain of the Royal Guard. In the other world, I am Jo Eun-seop, a social service worker whose personality is the complete opposite to Yeong’s. I’m having a lot of fun filming this, so please look forward to it.

--What does “my country” mean to you?

WDH: I believe it’s the people around me. I have family, I have friends, and I also have colleagues. A life where I can live happily with all of them, that is my dream country, I guess. No one goes on without desire, so I want to live together while caring for each other.

--You’ve been called the “Monstrous Newcomer”. With this kind of recognition, do you feel pressured?

WDH: I’m always under pressure. However, I tell myself I can’t lose to it, I have to work harder to overcome it.

--Finally, a message to your Japanese fans.

WDH: 2020 was the year I definitely wanted to meet all my Japanese fans, but filming for “The King” started earlier than expected and hasn’t finished yet. I was incredibly jealous when I heard that Se-jong held a Japanese fan meeting at the end of 2019. When “The King” finishes, I would like to meet you all. Until then, please take care of yourself and be happy. I will do my best to finish my work and greet you in good form. If you haven’t seen “My Country” yet, I definitely invite you to watch it.  I also hope you look forward to “The King”.

You can direct fan mail to:

KEYEAST / 30, 11-Gil, Hakdong-ro, Gangnam-gu, Seoul 06042 Korea

[eldrai]

all i’ll ever be is partly settled in

Aaron has a working theory that autistic and -adjacent traits are, despite the typical assumptions, beneficial to profiling. There’s a considerable overlap in the symptoms of autism and the job description and although it might be a co-incidence, there’s a reason why.

or: on Hotch and masking.

words: 743

very light angst

read on ao3

A/N: Just something I posted to ao3 a while back and thought I might as well bring it over here too. Not my usual style of fic but it got me out of writer’s block so hey. Based off a headcanon I have.

Aaron has a working theory that autistic and adjacent traits are, despite the typical assumptions, beneficial to profiling.

It isn’t difficult to see: above average visual and structural thinking; a tendency towards a more analytical approach; better attention to detail; a natural ability to notice patterns and good recall. There’s a considerable overlap in the symptoms of autism and the job description and although it might be a co-incidence, there’s a reason why.

Not that it’s useful with a sample size of one. If he asked, he imagines Reid would be happy to help, would know more about it than he does, really, but two isn’t much of an improvement. He’d have to tell Reid. Reid, who, with a quiet sort of courage didn’t care what people thought about him, had joked that his autism was statistically the most average thing about him.

He isn’t naïve enough to think anti-discrimination laws do much beyond a legal sense; and even that is tenuous. Just because they can’t outright fire or demote him for it doesn’t stop them finding a minor reason to assign him to some desk job where he’s got no influence on anything that matters, and if that happens immediately after they know he’s – about him, that’s just a co-incidence.

At least unfair dismissal is clear and concrete to fight about: Aaron is far more concerned with the day-to-day annoyances. The subtle shift in treatment, pushing him further from capable and leader and trusted. His team aren’t immune to those unconscious biases.

Hail clatters off the jet over the low rumble of the engines (Rolls-Royce, BR700, new – he’s not obsessed with planes like he was as a kid but he’s got more than a passable interest in them) and Aaron tilts his head back against the seat. There’s a dull ache behind his eyes. He’s always had a harder time tolerating sound than light.

The others are talking. He isn’t following the conversation but he hears the easy rhythm to it, back-and-forth, and their laughter, and something in his chest twinges.

Because as much as autism is helpful, Aaron does wonder what it’d be like to not have to think so hard about a mundane chat; to just know what to say with the same instinct everyone else has. He has his expectations, his framework, memorised the euphemisms and expressions and flow of it all, and he can stitch it all together into something passable.

(Aaron had wanted to be a lawyer long before his father had shoved him in that direction. Wanted it since the first time he’d sat up in the gallery at the county courthouse, too short to see over the railings properly, and what he heard made sense to him like nothing else has since.)

And sure, he’s at an advantage when most people are thrown off their guard, but profiling teaches them to be. They notice odd body language from a gut instinct, he recognises it because he’s learnt what they mean, notices when the emotion on someone’s face doesn’t match. He catches out odd word choice and patterns based on his scripts. That doesn’t mean others are worse because their hint comes from instinct.

And it’s not as if he lacks it entirely. Just doesn’t have it to the same extent.

Normal people can catch up with him; Aaron can only mimic their communication – and he does it well, granted – but it’s superficial. He understands it, that’s never been the issue. The toll it takes on him outside work doesn’t feel worth it.

They’re flying into sheets of rain and the engines roar as he digs a Tylenol out of the blister pack in his bag and swallows it dry. In his jacket pocket, Aaron presses the pad of his thumb over a tarnished coin, feels the embossing dig in, and in having spare change on him he’s got plausible deniability for one of very few stims subtle enough to go unnoticed, let alone not being clocked as stimming at all.

Because if they notice stimming, they notice autism. Something weird to the average person is intriguing to profilers as sharks go for blood, and Aaron hasn’t put the effort into blending in just to let it fall apart.

His head is tight with a band of pain from temple to temple and they’re hours out from touching down in Quantico. It must show on his face.

“All right?” Dave asks quietly.

Aaron nods. “Just tired.”

[impaladolan]

What if y/n tried to sneak out again and ends up opening a door and it’s literally a conference room and grays ins sitting head of the table and it’s filled w mafia men lmaooo and she’s just like oh sorry was looking for the bathroom which is an obvious lie cos girl has one in her room and she runs away and one of them catch her and take back to grays I mean does he punish her in front of the men girl that’s up to you but even if he doesn’t I feel like it’s like a lowkey funny concept like poor girl she just tryna escape hahaha

Anonymous said

i think it would be fun if y/n just constantly winds up him now in hopes he will get sick of her antics and just tell her everything hehe like maybe one day she steals his rolex, smashes all the plates lmaoo idk now that i type that out i feel like he won’t care and just spank her ass every time (which i highly doubt she’s gonna complain about lol)

Capture - Grayson Dolan [7/-]

summary: y/n has always been a curious women, but when she stumbles upon something she’s not supposed to.. things become too much to handle...

warnings: swearing & humiliation/degradation..

a/n: do y’all want to do tags @?? and also, thank you sweet anons for the prompts! love you all 💕

The events to which had pertained early this morning continuously played on a loop in your head. Rerun after rerun, and you never ran out of film. It really made you question your decision-making skills, or rather any of the skills and manners you have acquired in your short time of living. You couldn't help the "imbalance of homeostasis" moreover your impulsive, fluctuant feelings that would come over you like a rushing water at times. It really made everything a bit more difficult to understand. In shorter terms;

What the hell even happened?

You couldn't deny or even feel guilty for the wrongdoings of this morning, but nor could you exactly excuse them. Yes, it was a heat of the moment type of thing and you really should have expected him to come barging in like that, but it still had taken you off guard. Although, when you think back to what happened, you don't regret it.

You miss it.

You miss the way it felt, to be sat atop of him and needing for his scared touch. He was like a drug. An addictive, life sucking drug that wouldn't wash away from your mind. He was all you could think about.

He is all you can think about.

The wanting demand to know his name, the request to see his godawful handsome face, the aching of his touch. Everything about him was mysterious and daunting. He drew you in, like a magnet against steel. The burning desire you have for him doesn't make sense.

How could you be in love with someone you barely know? Someone who had taken you away from everything you've ever known. A man that knows the ins and outs of you, yet you couldn't even recognize his name?

It feels like a game. A stupid, twisted fucking game that you're bound to lose to.

Sighing to your intrusive thoughts, you blow a wavering piece of hair from your face. You were stuffed under the lengthy duvet and your eyes were directed at the spinning ceiling fan above. The industrial, artificial wind-making machine upwards reminded you of a similar one placed in your room at home. Of course, this one didn't have a squeak but it still made the pit of your stomach drop in an agony-filled remembrance of home. It feels like forever ago when you used to run every morning. The feel of the harsh wind against your cheeks and the subtle pumping of your heart was washed away with the same old gray walls that you were enclosed by every single waking moment.

The sudden thought of just that sparked energy within you.

You were pretty exhausted from prior events and you thought you’d be able to get a nap or two in. But your overthinking and legitimate thoughts clouded your head and you just couldn’t find a way to sleep properly. Although now, you were ready to explore.

Well, explore the kitchen.

The mere thought of a tall glass of iced water sounds satisfactory. Especially for your often dry throat. So, you hassled out of the flooding white covers and marched straight to the door, pulling down the only thing that covers you; a large white t-shirt— presumably his. The urge to soothe the parchedness that swirled within you only strengthened as you trekked past the door and into the ominous hallway. You werent for sure if he was home or not, but at this point it really didn't matter. You were thirsty and you were gonna do something about it, one way or another.

You retraced your steps from only a few days beforehand, when you had tried to escape, which had ended in complete failure. Thinking back to it, it surprises you that he actually knew you were in the walk-in pantry the entire time.

It seems like he knows just about everything.

Like you remembered, the hall opened up into a large, modern looking kitchen that could possibly sustain an expensive restaurant if it really had to. Before you could pause in absolute awe by just gaping at it, you get straight to work in finding a glass. You swung open most of the cabinet doors, opening to mainly spice racks and pots/pans that looked pricier than your own vehicle. You finally found something that could fit the desired contents and you went straight for the fridge. Just as quickly, you dip your cup in the little boxed formation and listen to the ice cubes soothingly fall. You didn't even worry about the deafening bangs of the cubes as they fell from the dispenser, or the crackling or the cool water slipping down and around their entirety.

God, it looks like heaven.

You bring the cylindrical shape up to your lips and let the freezing water slip down your tongue and throughout your body. It cured any and everything that seemed to be wrong, at least for the moment. You dont stop your drinking until the water is fully ingested and the ice begins to burn the tip of your nose. You place the glass carefully on the counter and deeply inhale, shutting your eyes for a brief moment to think.

You’re tired of staying in that room all damn day, and you need a change of scenery. You know there’s got to be way more in this house than just the couple rooms you’ve ventured in, and what’s the worst that could happen?

Aww, he spanks your ass again?

Like that would solve anything anyway. He should know by now that it affects you differently. He seems to know everything else about you. It’s actually really frustrating. For him to know all the details and you’re left in the weird gray area that’s clueless and dumb. It makes you so aggravated and angered, and you wanted to oh so bad, put your foot down in some way.

So, that’s what you’ll do.

A devilish grin comes across your face as you leave the kitchen, waltzing into the dining area with scouring eyes. What could you possibly do to make the “almighty capturer” upset? The first thing to come across your head was unorganization.

He seems like a perfectionist, someone who likes everything put in their exact places and to not be tampered with. You share that similar quality, but you aren’t an extremist like him.

You first lay your eyes on the dining room table, the centerpiece along with the runner looking a little too nice. With a sense of urgency, you decide sabotage. Firstly, you grab the extravagant-looking art sculpture and set it on the floor. After, you crumple the cloth underneath it. With an odd smirk, you pull out all the chairs in not so orderly fashion.

Wow, Y/N, you really did some damage..

Taking a couple steps back to look at the petty mess you've made, a chuckle erupts from your mouth and you sigh yet again. You shrug the simplicity away from your head and continue your walking. You come about a spiraling staircase and instantly begin to climb it, eager to see the upper floor’s decor. Your hand slides against the railing as you become steps closer to your desired destination, another chic and modern looking domain before your eyes. Unlike the downstairs, this room held a lot more art work and a certain professionality you couldn't begin to explain, but you continued to move forward. You approach another hallway, except this one withheld a deadend, large double doors that open outward. It somehow gained your attention and you couldn't help but want a quick look inside. Nothing was really stopping you and there are no signs of him around, so why not?

You didn’t really need an answer, you just went ahead and did what was on your mind. Exerting the small amount of force needed to push down the handles, you pull the doors open wide and focus your eyes on the room’s interior.

Men, sat all along a table that led all the way up to him.

Your eyes widen in immediate shock and your jaw drops open. All of their heads turn in the direction of a barely dressed girl standing in the doorway, disrupting the importance of a meeting with their leaders.

You.

Papers were strung all over the long piece of oak and there was bustling before you rudely interrupted their transactions and communicating, but you were too frozen to react or runaway.

“What the fuck are you doing up here, Y/N?” He said your name with such a deep and dark mannerism, it made your pussy throb unexpectedly. “I- Uhm, I.. Bathroom?” Words wouldn’t come out straight, no matter how hard you tried. You felt the stares of a million, but you could only focus your gaze on him.

And he looks furious.

What could you do to escape all of this? Well, running actually. You take off just as you see him get up from his seat. You speed back down the hallway you first walked down and curved through the different paths you had taken prior. The faint “go fucking get her” that spilled from his lips had made it to your ears and a certain fear ignited within you.

You could hear the footsteps behind you, but you didn’t stop. You were almost down the steps, until that menacing touch of someone grabbing you right before freedom— immersed around you. You knew it wasn’t his arms wrapped around you, but you didn’t dare look back to see whose it actually was. You wanted to cry, struggling to stay in his grasp as he lifted you back up and into the meeting room from whence you came.

“Let her down, Marc.” His wondrous voice filled your ears and you’ve never felt so secure yet troubled in your entire lifetime. The large arms unraveled from around you and you were softly placed on the ground. You didn’t dare to look up, but instead focus on the ground beneath you.

“Get your ass over here, slut.” His dark voice filled the quiet room, and your heart plummeted at the sound of such a slur. Sadly, you could only listen to him, so you walk carefully around the table, making your way to his perch. You weren’t even fully near him until his arm reached out and clutched your wrist, forcefully pulling you towards him. He roughly laid you over his lap, in front of everyone, and pulled up the bottom of your shirt, allowing every eye to see you lower half nakedness.

And just like the early morning prospects, an echoing slap to your ass filled the room’s silence. “This is what fucking happens, Y/N. When you disobey me.” You could tell his jaw was clenched and his face was red with anger by the way he was talking. Tears began to form in your eyes, but not from the pain, but from the embarrassment.

How’re you supposed to face all the people in this room, after getting an ass whooping for the second time today?

“Guess you don’t know how to fuckin’ listen well, do you Y/N?” He kept saying your name like it was some kind of extravaganza, which humiliated you all the more. You didn’t want everyone to know who you are, laid across a grown man’s lap and getting seriously aroused amidst people.

Out of the blue, he wraps his hand around the back of your neck to pull you back up to face him, a dark red spread across your cheeks. “Lucky I don’t make you suck my fuckin’ cock in front of all of ‘em. Then they’d know you aren’t such a bad little girl, wouldn’t they?” He whispers against your ear as he sets you on his knee, facing the direction of the stone cold men veering their eyes on everything but you— away from the awful scene.

You shake your head to his words, feeling his large hands linger under your shirt. “Don’t think so? Would that embarrass you, sweetheart? Cause I couldn’t give a less fuck about that right now.” His hands continue to travel upwards, wrapping around the both of your unclothed breasts, the thin shirt material not doing much justice.

“Please, no. I-I’ll do whatever you want, just please— not here.” With those words of plea, you cross your arms over his hands and train your eyes to the floor in humiliation.

“Get back to you room, and don’t leave it. You’re on thin fucking ice, princess.”

to be continued...

a/n: don’t ask me why, i really don’t know why he has such an affinity for spanking her 🤷‍♀️ and it’s also 1:00 am that I finally finished this.. procrastination at its finest..

[concerningwolves]

Hey I'm doing a short story for class about an autistic girl who discovers she have telekinesis and I want to knows how to portray her properly and how beint autustic affect her powets with makint autism sounds baf

Hi anon! I’m very sorry if I’m answering this too late for you; I barely had time to even look at my inbox in October and November, and then when I got time to do so this month, I got overwhelmed by the backlog. Nonetheless, I’ll answer this and hope that even if it’s too late for your original purpose, something in it will help you (/help anyone else who reads this) :]

AUTISM, SUPERPOWERS & FAIR REPRESENTATION

Okay, so, the basic answer to “how not to make autism sound bad” is approach the story with compassion and/or empathy – but that’s a very broad answer and probably not overly helpful for specifics. I’ll start with the “how to represent autism well” part and then break down the superpower-specific stuff from there.

1) Autism should be an integral part of your characters’ personhood, but not their entire personality

As an autistic, I struggle to define where my autism ends and my personhood (i.e., my sense of the “self”) begins, because they’re so deeply entwined with one another.  Autism is a condition that alters how I think and interact with the world, and therefore profoundly impacts how I perceive both myself and the things around me. That doesn’t mean, however, that my only personality trait is autism. It all gets very convoluted and existential – would I still be ‘me’ if you removed autism? What is ‘me’? Is it even fair to think of autism as a separate Thing? – but it is worth considering if you want to get inside your autistic character’s head.

A trap that allistic creators tend to fall into is “this character likes [X] / does [X] because they are autistic”. For example, I once saw someone say that their OC likes blue because it’s a calming colour and therefore sensory-safe. This is a valid process on its own: I also like pale blue (+ other pastel shades) because it’s a sensory-safe colour! But where many allistics fall down is in not considering that an autistic character’s likes, dislikes and hobbies don’t have to relate to their autism.

Although the show has its flaws, I do think that Sam Gardener from Netflix’s Atypical is a positive example of an autistic character just liking something because they like it. His special interest is all to do with penguins and antartic wildlife/explorations, and he also enjoys art as a hobby because... he just does. That’s not to say these things don’t intersect – he takes a scientific illustration class in college precisely because it combines two things he likes; it’s also fair to say that autism gives him an edge in drawing because autism brain is excellent at grasping theory/technicalities. But ultimately it’s nice to have an autistic character whose interests and personality traits go beyond the stereotypical special interest.

For more on representing autistic characters, check out [this post] where I go into a bit more depth. (NOTE: that post is on my list of things that I want to revise/rewrite/flesh out, so it might change soon, but the basic stuff is still the same).

2) Autism isn’t inherently “bad” – but that doesn’t mean it’s without issues, either

Autism is not the devastating tragedy that neurotypicals like to present, but it does come with its own difficulties and pitfalls that you should acknowledge if you want to write a well-rounded autistic character. There’s often discourse/debates on my dash about whether it’s fair to call autism a disability. I’d say it is – there are definitely aspects of autism that are disabling, i.e., sensory overload, burnout, trouble communicating, etc. – but it isn’t a disability in the way that allistics/abled people think.  

Some aspects of autism are “double edged”, in that they have useful and troublesome sides. Speaking for myself, hyper-empathy means that I’m good at grasping why emotions Do The Thing, which is incredibly useful in filling in gaps in my social sense! But. It also means that I struggle to draw a line between my own emotions and someone else’s, and am simply awful at creating healthy emotional boundaries. As the writer, you create good representation by showing both sides. Let your character have meltdowns! Let them have trouble in social situations! Let them get burnt out or overwhelmed! But also make sure to show that this doesn’t make them inherently burdensome to other characters, and explore the good/neutral aspects of autism, too.

3) So, how would all of this impact superpowers?

A lot of that depends on your world’s magic/superpower system. Some things to consider are:

Does your character need to be concentrating?

Do emotions influence how controlled the power is?

Does the power take a physical or mental toll on the user?

etc.

These are laws you ought to think about as part of worldbuilding, regardless of a characters’ neurotype or ability, but I do believe that autism will have an impact on how a character interacts with their powers. For example, many autistic people have difficulty with fine motor skills and spatial awareness, either as part of autism or due to a co-existing condition [1]. This could theoretically cause trouble if a character needs to gauge personal space/use spatial perception when using telekinesis to direct objects. Where emotions effect a power, emotional dysregulation or rejection sensitive dysphoria could also come into play by disrupting a characters’ concentration or control. 

Make sure to show your character working with or around these sorts of issues, and keep a balance between the pros and cons. If sensory input throws off her concentration, what are ways she can get around that? Earplugs for noise, dark glasses for light sensitivity, seamless clothes, headphones... etc etc. On the more negative side, I can only imagine the chaos I might cause during a meltdown if I had telekinesis: objects flying everywhere, lightbulbs bursting, general pandemonium. That said, telekinesis would be great if I could levitate myself and just hang there without any sensory input. Also useful if I needed to get stuff and didn’t have the energy to move because of burnout, or if I could use telekinesis to “weigh down” a blanket on top of me during meltdowns. There are some really fun possibilities here! 

Another way to avoid showing autism as a burden/something bad is to give your character a support network and/or accommodations in the story. Have your character find ways to work around issues just like a neurotypical person would, yes, but also have other characters be understanding and ready to help. Thriving support systems are just as important as the autistic character themself.

Basically, address the fact that some aspects of autism are difficult to cope with/require aid but don't overtly focus on that, you know? Your character can get upset, frustrated, or be resigned. She can beat herself up! All autistic people live with this feeling of "not good enough". But show her overcoming this, show her with a good support system, and show her being a person as complex and developed as any other character.

FOOTNOTE(S)

[1] general practise in diagnostic circles is to avoid diagnosing with things like dyspraxia if another developmental disorder is present (i.e., autism), but we’re still learning about what the big ice-cream bar of autism actually covers. What traits an autistic person has can vary hugely from one person to another.

[atopearth]

Collar X Malice Part 4 - Shiraishi Kageyuki Route

Lmao that the way to get on Shiraishi's route is to be honest and call him strange hahah. Honestly, Shiraishi isn't my type, but I'm interested in him because he doesn't appear much in the other routes so he's pretty mysterious. I can see why Shiraishi is interested in Ichika though, especially considering he's involved in criminal profiling, it's like Ichika is such a normal girl, why exactly would Adonis be specifically interested in her? I liked how Shiraishi made it plain to Ichika that they needed to co-operate because she definitely wouldn't be able to find anything about a mole in the police force by herself, with no connections etc when others much more capable than her haven't been able to lol. It's actually cute how much Shiraishi seems to like cats, I agree that naming them as numbers is much easier to remember, but at the same time, to recognise 37 different cats? That's pretty amazing in itself lol. Honestly though, when he talked about it was nice to be a cat, getting to be lazy and free, but at the same time living with uncertainty and not knowing when you could die as a "price" of that freedom, it felt pretty sad... Is living freely better or living securely?🤔

Takeuchi (the teacher who taught the guys who died in the September and October cases) is so pretty! Anyway, I actually really like how much Shiraishi and Ichika bump heads with each other, especially considering how different they are, yet how "honest" they both are in the sense that Ichika doesn't hide her dislike towards him, and Shiraishi doesn't hide how much he's "interested" in people like her that he can't understand because they can empathise with others I guess. Personally, in terms of questioning Takeuchi, I would say that I have to agree with Shiraishi's methods, mainly because, I'm sure Takeuchi has been questioned many times, and there would have been many different officers, but probably not one as interested as Shiraishi and Ichika since they actually believe there's more to Hachisuka (the guy that was killed in the September case) than the "perfect" student. But I do think that if they want more information, then Shiraishi's methods would only let you know that there's something more to it, whereas Ichika's methods might get to her better? Anyway, what I really enjoy about their relationship right now is how upfront Ichika is about her feelings and thoughts towards him. I especially liked when she told him that he should remember her name because she felt that it was important for him to remember that so they could trust and respect each other. 

Lmao when Ichika thought she was joining some top secret coalition with Mukai but it was really just a complaining about Shiraishi group that comprised of Sakuragawa🤣 HAHAHA, I was wondering why would Sakuragawa hate Shiraishi but OMG it's super justified. He purposely bothered to have a chef make a "hamburger patty" out of natto just to see her reaction since she absolutely hates it lollll. I would hate him too. Honestly, I love Mukai, and how she handles Shiraishi because he totally deserves it lol. I find it funny how she can be so blunt with him, and lmao that she actually tried to kick him before but missed🤣 Shiraishi spending time every now and then to go and hear Mukai and them complain about him is so sadistically funny lol. Awww Ichika sleeping on his lap is super cuteeee. I wonder what Mukai and Sakuragawa are going to say since Shiraishi implied that they're in that sort of relationship and that's why they left the passed out Ichika (from accidentally chugging Shiraishi's drink) to him, I feel like they'd tell her to reconsider🤣 I wonder if no one ever thanks Shiraishi and that's why he was so surprised when Ichika thanked him for hiding the collar from Sakuragawa and Mukai for her lol. To be fair, considering his personality, I can't imagine anyone thanking him for anything he does lol. Lmao when Mukai and Sakuragawa interrogated Ichika about Shiraishi and her relationship loll, and now they want her to be a spy lmao. I don't know why so many guys like to think it's their responsibility to "teach" the heroine that it's either dangerous to let guys into their homes or to go to the guy's house alone, like seriously!! It's not that we don't think it's dangerous or anything, we just trust you! Like geez. Anyway, Shiraishi definitely went overboard pinning Ichika to the wall, regardless of his intentions, that's scary and unwarranted. Otherwise, I'm impressed Ichika wants to understand Shiraishi better after that. Anyway, I do feel like Shiraishi acted the way he did because he didn't know how to act towards Ichika. Usually he's met with people who either dislike him, don't care or outwardly dislike him, so I feel like Ichika being so nice to cook for him made him feel awkward and not know what to do and act since he's always so sadistic and cynical. I could be wrong though haha.

I forgot to mention it but it's interesting how it was Shiraishi's profiling that ended up catching the culprit 2 years ago when the attempted assassination on the Prime Minister was, since that was the case that changed Okazaki. I really liked how Ichika and Shiraishi finally communicated properly in the sense that they just bothered to talk to each other and try to understand each other. I guess considering his personality, most people would give up on him, so it must be surprising that Ichika is so persistent. I liked how he finally called her by her name haha. Awww, I love how they exchanged the cat straps they got from the gachapon machine. Imagining Shiraishi fiddling with one of those machines, never having played with one is pretty cute haha. Pretty hilarious when Shiraishi got flustered over Ichika saying she preferred him this way (not so weird lol) and he accidentally dropped a stack of papers🤣 I also found it pretty funny when she told him to be careful and he said he didn't need to, and Ichika was like you should practice what you preach since not taking your own advice is dumb😂😂 She totally got him hahahah. Aww Shiraishi thanking Ichika for trusting him was so cuteee. It was really sweet how Shiraishi acknowledged Ichika's efforts in the SCRPO, she really does try her best to listen to the people calling the police to complain and she really takes it all to heart, so it's nice to see how much he recognises her efforts. I wonder if Shiraishi's flashback means that he got experimented on as a child🤔 Anyway, I think I'm really warming up to their relationship. I think it's really cute how "normal" Shiraishi actually is lol. Him getting mad that Ichika was telling Sakuragawa and Mukai that she didn't feel anything for him, and then her running after him just to explain that she doesn't hate him, and then him getting happy and saying it back to her was just so adorable hahaha.

I feel so terrible for the counsellor lady (Uno) who got driven to suicide because of Hachisuka. Like, it was obvious Hachisuka wasn't as "clean" as his records said, but to think that he had so much power over the school because of his mother's "donations" and then couldn't hack that Uno rejected him (since you know she has a husband and kids, like c'mon dude) and then started threatening her + other mental torment from his groupies. It's just crazy to think that she ended up so ballistic (killed her husband and tried to kill her kids but failed and then ended up committing suicide) just because she refused a teenager's "love". That's just so sad.. It's nice to see more of Saeki this time around, it was so funny when he told Shiraishi to take care of Ichika because he believed in the rumours that they were dating. To be fair, he's eating dinner with her at work late at night sharing a lunchbox etc so it's hard to not think that even if they say they aren't lol. I guess those murderous twins are Uno's children? Anyway, I like how even though Shiraishi said a lot of mean stuff and crap to Ichika about everything being a lie, but Ichika decided to believe in the him she spent time with, and that if it was a lie, then he should show her his real self then. Ichika is pretty strong haha. Personally, I'm not a fan of the voice acting for Shiraishi, or maybe it's just Shiraishi himself lolll but I think I do like the progress with their relationship because of how blunt they are with each other. I think her honesty really works well with how sneaky and evasive Shiraishi usually is, since it's difficult for him to handle someone so genuinely kind and appreciative of him as a person haha. Well, Takeuchi's thoughts etc were pretty much expected, but very understandable, I don't think I could ever move on if I felt like I betrayed my friend and left her all alone just to protect myself. And her guilt would make her want to protect Uno's children now.. I'm not sure about Takeuchi's decision to tell Uno's children what really happened with their parents at the young age of 18 but I guess I can understand her thoughts of not wanting them to hate their mother. I guess she regrets it a lot now but yeah...that's sad..

Seeing the story of the Uno siblings was pretty terrible. Such a normal happy family getting crushed was terrible. I think the worst was definitely when their mother murdered their father right in front of them. Anyway, considering Shiraishi's analysis and everything, there's really no new information about their "story" so it's really just watching them struggle between their desires to live but also to die. I'm just glad the siblings had Takeuchi in their lives tbh, otherwise it would have been worse. When Shiraishi said that the feeling of someone needing you makes you think that it's all right to exist, I couldn't help but agree with that. I used to be obstinate with the idea that a person should create their own "value" and I guess their desire to live because in the end, you can't rely on others for your own life, and I guess I still think like that. But at the same time, I feel like there will always be times when another person can be your drive to live, and to make you think that you want to live because of them. Sure, it's not always the healthiest mindset, but at the same time, when you have nothing else to live for, at least having them makes you think that this life is still worth living to an extent even if other things suck. I'm glad that Takeuchi, Shion and Suzune got to properly talk it out and communicate their feelings, but I still find their reason for killing those three people to kinda like "free" Takeuchi rather...silly? Like I guess I can understand their perspective in the sense that they wanted to end things for Takeuchi, but even though they ended that part, they started another part where Takeuchi would feel guilty that her actions led to those decisions that they made. Anyway, I guess the main thing we can be happy about is that they understood well enough that killing themselves would torment Takeuchi much more, but it's still kinda funny that they can understand that but not understand enough to not commit murder. I guess their hatred and emotions needed some sort of outlet, and just because you understand doesn’t mean you won’t do it.

It's understandable for Shiraishi to love cats for their freedom, and I think that's what I love about cats too, well I guess more specifically stray cats or outdoor cats. They don't live according to anyone's schedule, they go out and do what they want, come home when they feel like it and are cute lol. Their lives are much more vibrant than mine and I think that's so interesting. I loved their cat observing date, it was so cute how serious Ichika was about trying to remember each individual cat and writing notes down just because she knew Shiraishi likes them so she wanted to be more engaged in it too. Them holding hands to the supermarket was adorableeee~ Lmao, I love how Ichika lured Kazuki to the office with Yanagi and them by stealing his guitar, I mean of course with how disobedient he is, he'll never go just because she told him so. I guess it's good that Shiraishi helped to make Kazuki more understanding of the seriousness of the situation. 

Hmmm interesting, when Adonis executives were leaked, I'm pretty sure it was Shiraishi, but killing Mikuni (prime minister's son in Adonis) in broad daylight? I'm pretty sure the "voice" Shiraishi talked to throughout the story was Mikuni and he seemed to have some kind of relationship with him that was relatively positive, so hmmm.. Did Zero do something to frame or manipulate Shiraishi? I see, Shiraishi's been brainwashed to practically follow Zero and Adonis... I really liked how there were flashbacks with Ichika and Shiraishi to kinda remind us of everything they've gone through, because even though Shiraishi isn't really a favourite of mine, I did enjoy Ichika and Shiraishi's relationship build up and I can understand why she would believe in the him that he showed to her rather than the him that Zero tells her he is. Hmmm I guess that "good ending" was interesting. I'm kinda disappointed with how things were revealed and how they ended though, like... I'm honestly rather mixed about the whole thing because I feel like Shiraishi's story could have been dealt with much better alongside his feelings, because I found his reasoning to kill Mikuni to gain the trust of Zero just to get Ichika's collar off I don't know...weird? There could have been better ways? But I guess this is how Shiraishi is in his own twisted and brainwashed way so it was understandable that he did it this way? But at the same time, I agree with Ichika about if he really loved her that much, why couldn't he find a method where they could live on together instead of this. Anyway, I wanted to call Shiraishi selfish for keeping Ichika with him when she was in a coma when she could have gone to a hospital etc, but knowing Ichika, I'm sure she would have wanted to spend as much time as she could with Shiraishi before he atoned for his crimes. And, he did seem to be in regular communication with Yanagi and them, so I'm glad Kazuki didn't have to think she died and stuff, but I’m still iffy because considering Kazuki and stuff, I wouldn’t trust this random with my sister lol. Anyway, it's a bittersweet ending, but I did enjoy how everything ended with the Christmas party they promised to celebrate together. That tragic love ending CG was really beautiful though! And I'm glad to finally see an ending where Ichika gets practically brainwashed and joins Adonis after failing to save Shiraishi, and inversely Shiraishi failing to protect her and her heart. Although I kinda still find it unlikely that she would be able to kill Yanagi and them but who knows, doesn't really matter I guess.

Overall, I have mixed feelings about Shiraishi. He's definitely not my type but I did enjoy how Ichika and Shiraishi kinda bounced off each other with their differences and personal values. They were always upfront with what they thought and honest about what they liked, what they didn't like and I think their relationship was done really nicely. They had a lot of cute moments such as visiting the stray cats and holding hands etc and I honestly feel like I should have liked Shiraishi, but I actually don't lol. Like, I guess I liked their relationship, but his story and everything didn't resonate with me. Personally, I feel like the greatest setback for this route was actually that it focused too much on building the romance and neglected Shiraishi's background with Adonis, his feelings and thoughts, and his relationship with Mikuni that ended up hurting him because he basically killed him to help Ichika. I feel like everything about Shiraishi and Adonis at the end was like an information dump about how Adonis takes care of orphans to raise as their officers or whatever, which imo felt kinda weird because supposedly so many of them exist but they’re never a part of the story in any way, and why do they bother trying to find people like Ichika to become executors other than to use them as scapegoats or something, but the core of the X-Day plans basically has nothing to do with these officers? Anyway, I just found the whole thing with Shiraishi and Adonis to be handled poorly and I think it could have made a bigger impact on me if they bothered to focus a bit more on it throughout the route instead of just at the end where it honestly didn't make me feel anything for him or the whole thing. I sound so slack lolll, but the biggest indication that I really didn't enjoy it that much was when I straight away went into Yanagi's story afterwards loll. I usually need time to digest when I finish a route, but yeah I think I was pretty disappointed with Shiraishi and his route. But I do like how it was different to the others since it's not really a "happy ending" considering he's a criminal etc, so that was interesting, but I feel sorry for the people that would have wanted something happier. Anyhow, really liked the romance development and their relationship but not so much the Adonis stuff surrounding Shiraishi, however the Uno siblings were nice “villains” for this route.

[gracehcreates-bct]

W8 Studio - Project into the public

X-Challenge

I entered my team into X-Challenge, but unfortunately our group was too big to do the whole project so we split ourselves into two and did the app and boot cleaner as seperate ideas.

Boot Cleaner Prototype

Kent made a boot cleaner prototype over the weekend, using cardboard and pvc pipes. Not included is the spray, which would be situated underneath the boot.

Survey Results

I sent out the survey on facebook, first to the Creative Technologies Year 3 page and then my neighbourhood community’s page. So far there are 62 responses.

1. How often do you go on walking trails?

Once a week - 11 people Once fortnightly - 7 people Once a month - 23 people Once a year - 18 people Never - 3 people

2. Who would you usually take with you? (pick between 1 - 2)

Family - 46 people Friends - 19 people Dogs - 12 people No-one - 11 people

3. Have you heard of the Kauri Dieback Disease?

61/62 people have heard of Kauri Dieback.

4. If yes, how do you think preventing it is to New Zealand’s forests in the future? (on a scale of 1 - 10)

Average is 9.1, with 6 out of 60 people who answered this question ranking it below 8.

5. What would make the boot cleaner more convienent?

About 17 out of 62 thought that the boot cleaner was fine as it is. Two people answered there should be more of them.

Answers about the station itself: - Maybe if it was longer so you can keep moving as you clean. So others don’t get held up behind you. - If more people could use it at the same time. - Maybe a larger, flatter station - Proper set up like your picture - as some are only a mat and can easily be avoided - A seat to sit on when spraying shoes with the stuff. Very hard to work hose on one foot with a pack on - Regular servicing - I guess it's a bit of a bottle neck, depending on the popularity of the trial maybe it holds people up? - Have more of an obstacle that makes it so you get in slower. Therefore, making you clean your shoes more thoroughly? :D - Better maintenance sometimes they are worn out - Clearer instructions Easier to use Maybe a video

Answers about boot cleaner: - I guess if it rotated it might get more sit out from the grooves? Also, with covid I try to avoid touching anything and this this old style and the spray gun you have to touch - Have a cleaner for jandals. This one doesn’t work so well - Foot activated sprays. Physical barriers that force people to activate the spray to get thru the barrier. - Weight based means children and lighter people don't activate it so perhaps something that doesn't get activated by weight that you walk through. Shallow enough to just cover sole of shes/boots - Maybe some foot level spray system. Sometimes balancing on one foot to spray is tricky - the spray trigger should have a novel so that it covers each shoe in one spray - Fixed brushes as shown here. The hand squirter and hand brush combination is too difficult to manage. Lose balance and give up - A hand held brush to scrub the side of shoes. - No spray, just scrub and step - A device to clamp around shoes and spray all around - Rotating brushes - Making the brushes not worn down. Last bush walk I went on the brushes for your feet were too worn down and didn’t work very well - Bending down is tricky so a system that doesn’t make you bend over is good - If it always had disinfectant in it. - It having the spray stuff in it and not be empty - Not have to use the hand spray bottle that is found on some stations. - Find it ok as it is, but prefer the one that sprays your shoes when you stand on it to the hand held one - Automatic - probably some type of automated boot cleaner - I am liking the new "hop on to spray" pads

Other: - It’s fine but something to keep the spray from coming up and wetting your shoes and ankles would be good-keep it to the soles - designing something the birds might use, as it's far more likely to be transmitted by them. - An agent that actually is proven as working on phytophthora - I think the boots cleaners are possibly okay, it's the dogs i always think , might be more carriers especially as often off lead when they shouldn't be. - Nothing. I think it’s clearly marked with instructions and you can’t miss them at the beginning and end of tracks. One time there was a DOC guy there educating people how to clean boots properly which was helpful cos I had actually been doing the process the wrong way around prior to that! - RGB LEDs, to attract the kids - maybe having someone employed by like doc or something to make sure there are ppl washing their shoee

6. How effective do you think the covid tracer app was in preventing the spread of covid-19? (on a scale of 1 - 10)

Average is 7.3, with only 5 people out of 62 ranking it below a 5.

7.  We are designing an app and deciding on the content, what is most appealing to you?

Treasure Hunt - #1.82 average Augmented Reality boot cleaner - #2.06 average Running statistics tracker - #2.11 average

8.  Why did you choose the previous answer? Otherwise, give us an example of something you’d like to see on it.

About 5/46 people answered that they couldn’t see the image I had used, which is my own fault but the survey website is difficult to understand. 4/46 directly said “Treasure Hunts are fun”. Two people said it didn’t matter as long as it was simple to use.

- Statistics can drive behaviour - Treasure hunt appeals to families using tracks - There is a general lack of information about Kauri Dieback at the boot cleaning stations especially Tane Mahuta - information would result in adherence - The question wasn’t clear to me so I chose the fun option. No idea what AR boot cleaner is - maybe I didn’t click on something? - Seemed the most applicable (Augmented Reality) - Didn’t really have a view. Not sure what the point of the treasure hunt and A4 - I just think the treasure hunt idea has more appeal. Not clear how it works - A map of dieback - Information on Kauri on the area you are about to walk in, how many, if have any signs of disease - Definitely make it fun to use, stats make it interesting - learn with play: Tree/ nature trivia, e.g. like: what tree is this? (photo) - Sounds more fun (Treasure Hunt) - Fun makes things engaging. Also, running is boring. - Treasure hunt might make it more interesting for the grandchildren I take hiking. I know what AR is but I cannot imaging it being useful for book cleaning. - Links with GPS - Easy to find information for the novice /infrequent tramper - I didn't see how the answers linked to the app. What's the purpose of the app? If it's just to track like the covid app it doesn't need anything else on it. Most people who run in the bush would use another app already. - if i got it my main , objective would be to help with Die-back .Stats would be interesting so No.2,Treasure hunt No.3 , as kids grown up , but even if younger i might have put 3 , but would be good for younsters - I may take my child if there is a treasure hunt as part of the app/walk - The AR boot cleaner would encourage people to clean their shoes properly because it would make cleaning more fun and accurate. - I like stats - and I like the new aspect of the covid app where you get a little sticker icon when you get 14 days diary entry. - Got to be something interesting and fun. Maybe as an incentive add in spot prizes provided by possible sponsors.. - NZ health statistics - Interactive is fun and makes you feel involved - More visually appealing (Treasure Hunt) - More fun makes people more likely to use. - Don't understand what the boot one is - Routes recommendation, especially secret/not popular spots. Treasure hunting is a bit like that - Treasure hunt seems rewarding. AR seems interactive. Statistics sound boring - I think that if you make it a sort of game it will encourage people to get into the nitty gritty parts of shoe! - Not sure why I'd want a virtual boot cleaner tbh. Other content could be birds to look out for.. bit of history, exercise tips - Helps me know which parts of my boots are clean :)

9.  Thank you for taking the time to do this. Any other ideas/feedback for us?

- Anything to help contain the spread and educate people is good-Tane Mahuta was our first experience and there was no information and no reception to be able to Google it. - Would love people to be encouraged to use the boot wash more. - Good idea to encourage behaviours that will stop the spread. Well done - no, its communist propaganda - I develop apps myself, but I am doubtful about their applicability to Kauri Dieback reduction - An alarm when boots are not cleaned properly. - Still not sure what your app will do. - Good luck , please put a reminder if possible the importance of dogs on leads in areas where needed.PS We do own a dog! - Thank you for your work - I put 10 as meaning it is very important. You don’t say how the scale works though - Kauri Dieback poses a serious issue and I'm glad theres a project looking at this!! 🙌 - I would just try to be really focused on the problem you want to solve. Is it boot cleaning, is it awareness, is it history, is it fitness

Additionally Miles emailed Dr Gerth, so we have an interview with her on May 27th.

[jennymanrique]

Redistricting battle heats up - Houston activists fight for fairer maps

The lack of representation provoked that during Hurricane Harvey, neighbors were not properly assisted by local governments.

Activists in Harris County, Texas, mobilize to make the once-every-decade redistricting process fairer to communities of color and low-income neighborhoods.

Every time Myrtala Tristan recounts her experiences during devastating Hurricane Harvey, she relives the scenes of relentless rain that turned her neighborhood’s streets into rivers and her home into a floating furniture museum.

“They never told us that we would have to evacuate or that it was going to be so terrible,” Tristan, a resident of Houston’s Lakewood suburb for nearly 40 years, recalled at a June 30 briefing on redistricting. “I live with my husband. For five hours I was calling (emergency) 311 and they never answered. We were up all night.”

Early the next morning Tristan left her house with just her driver’s license and some money, packed in a Ziploc bag. Outside, a boat was rescuing people from the fetid waters, prioritizing children and senior citizens.

“We were navigating those dirty waters all day. They didn’t give us water or food … I think this is very unfair and that the government should be helping us in a different way,” said Tristan. Almost three years later, “we are still applying for some help. Nothing ever came.”

Tristan joined the Northeast Action Collective, a group of advocates and neighbors that emerged in response to the lack of public investment in drainage and flood mitigation in her community. “It is time for our voices to be heard.”

Right now, Tristan is focusing on a county-wide effort to engage communities of color and low-income neighborhoods in redistricting – a process of redrawing political boundaries that determine what candidates people vote for.

“Redistricting is about drawing lines on a map to represent who is going to vote for certain elected officials,” explained Nina Perales, vice president of litigation for the Mexican-American Legal Defense and Education Fund (MALDEF). “It is a very political act to create groups of voters, so it is very important to get involved.”

Neighborhoods are grouped into districts that are redrawn every 10 years based on census data. Depending on what the electoral district is, those lines are drawn by the city council, the school district board of trustees, county commissioners, and ultimately the state chamber.

In places like Pasadena, a suburb in Harris County, these lines have effectively segregated the Latino from the Anglo population: Latinos live in the northern area that has historically received fewer services than the southern area – where Anglos live – making it more prone to floods and natural disasters.

When the Texas House of Representatives drew other lines within the northern zone that further divided the Latino vote, MALDEF filed a lawsuit and won, regrouping them in District 144 .

“The representative of that district, who was Anglo and conservative, lost his election. And he was replaced by a progressive Latina woman in the House of Representatives,” Perales said. “Our increased political participation is strongest when the political lines that are drawn around our neighborhoods are fair.”

Lost in translation

For Miguel Rivera, the Redistricting Outreach Fellow at the Texas Civil Rights Project (TCRP), one of the challenges is that the Hispanic community is still not familiar with these processes, starting with terms such as “gerrymandering” and “redistricting” that are difficult to translate.

“I first came upon this conundrum when trying to explain to my parents, who were both born in rural Mexico, what I did for a living,” Rivera said. “They understood the fight for voting rights which had a lot of translatable terms, but their understanding of the census and redistricting was very different based on what they knew in Mexico versus in the U.S.”

Now the TCRP is doing educational campaigns for the Hispanic community to coalesce behind a specific term: redistribution.

Cassandra Martinez, who just graduated from high school and will attend Columbia University in the fall, first heard the term in census workshops organized by Mi Familia Vota.

“Hispanics don’t know the specifics behind redistricting and census counting, but the community cares about income inequality, about the schools children go to, about the construction projects that never quite get done,” Martinez said.

“A lot of us come from immigrant households; our parents…feel disconnected from politics,” she added. “There is this whole mentality of ‘my vote doesn’t matter.’ What really helps people in my age group is connecting voting with the future of our families and communities.”

Deborah Chen, an attorney and activist with OCA-Greater Houston, relates a similar experience with Asian Americans and Pacific Islanders whose numbers are growing faster than Latinos in Texas. She said her organization knocked on more than 221,000 doors to make sure AAPIs were counted in the census. “You don’t have to be a citizen or registered voter to participate in redistricting,” she emphasized.

OCA uses “opportunity maps” to demonstrate how majorities and minorities in those districts receive services such as sewers, electricity, pavements, pipes, and so on.

“Everyone who got counted in neighborhoods in the greater Houston area is worth $15,700 in federal money, and districts determine how that money is spent,” Chen said. “You want to live where multiple communities are evenly balanced and they have an even chance of having representation.”

African-Americans also have suffered discrimination in how lines have been drawn mainly by Republicans in power, and for this reason organizations such as Pure Justice promote their participation in electoral map drawing.

“Everybody wants to crop the map out in a certain fashion for certain beneficiaries,” said Roshawn Evans, co-founder of this organization. “At the top of the political food chain, Republicans are on everything, but we still can make suggestive maps and draw them ourselves.”

“We want to keep together people who have the same kinds of problems, so I just want to emphasize that voting really matters,” he concluded.

Originally published here

Want to read this piece in Spanish? Click here

[pluralismajestatis]

9, 27, and 38 for the ask thing!

9. Describe what happened when an unusual fronter had a day in the limelight. - We actually tried taking turns on the front for the first time recently! M wanted to try it and I wanted to try getting off the front, so we chose a day when it would be “his turn” to be out, asked around for some tips on how to switch on purpose, and hoped for the best.

We went to bed together to help him front in the morning, and he was at the wheel when we first woke up, but the body was so tired he chose to get more sleep for us before getting up. The next time we woke up, it was me on the front again. We made a compromise that he’d have priority on decisions and messages that day, but wouldn’t have to try and force a front since clearly we don’t know how to switch at will, but when I put on his clothes, he pretty much just slipped in the front seat and I kind of ceased to exist, so it ended up going very smoothly.

He spent the day cleaning up the house - it relaxes him and is basically “him time” - and talking to our friends, making introductions to people he hadn’t met yet, and even sent our therapist a message, but he backtracked on that the next day deciding he wasn’t quite ready to take on the responsibility of therapy, and that it’d be better if I continued being the main attendee. 

Overall it was a very good experience for both of us, and we’ll try again once our batteries have recovered from this experience. So far, there hasn’t really been any acute interest in swapping up in proper since.

27. Who, if anyone, creates memory blackouts? - Everyone. Oh my god we keep having mini blackouts because people take front and leave front instantly for their own reasons. It’s been happening much more ever since we’ve started up communicating and expressing ourselves more, because we don’t really know how to take turns yet or properly navigate the whole being around together thing, so sometimes someone steals a moment from here and there, and whenever someone fronts in proper, while we have a co-consciousness and share memories, we don’t do it well, and it results in a very foggy memory of that situation - for everyone. Not just other alters but everyone because nobody here is recording memories alone or properly.

We’re working on that.

But when it comes to bigger, proper blackouts, we don’t tend to have those. We have good enough communication that nobody tends to lock away, we just don’t know how to properly share what we experience together.

38. Describe someone who doesn’t usually get a day in the limelight (if they consent). - E. E’s a loner, he doesn’t feel like he’s wanted around here so he sticks to himself. He likes exercise - particularly the gym - and exploring, urban exploration and in general, along with photography. He’s a bit of a tough guy, doesn’t really know how to take compliments or kindness, would give you a bear hug with a pat on the back but nothing emotional. Basically he’s a man and wants to keep it that way, and it’s a bit difficult with the rest of our group being so comfortable with each other and casual affection and closeness. He’s fronted once, did a good job at it even though it was a bit hard for him, and we’re hoping he’ll make friends with people soon and find ways to feel welcome with us and everybody else.

[fandom-necromancer]

658. I think people hug at this point.

This was prompted by the incredible @aurea-b! Enjoy!

Fandom: Detroit become human | Ship: RK1700 (Warnings: super short mentioning of suicide (but it’s just a character being hopeless for the sake of Hurt/Comfort), mentioned violence)

The angry clicking of fingers on keys were the only sounds filling the room. Connor sat on the couch in the living room, observing Nines sitting at the desk with a laptop. The android hadn’t moved for over an hour, continuously typing away only stopping to push the mouse around or growl at the thing as if it had offended him personally. Connor had known better than to disturb him in that state of mind, sometimes he was reminded of how they had met. Sometimes the android just looked too much like he had back then.

Connor could still feel the shock in his chassis as the RK900 had jumped through a window to attack him, how it had grabbed and crushed his arm, throwing him against a wall like an unwanted toy. It had taken the whole precinct to subdue it and chain it to a pillar. And still the droid didn’t back down. It was focussed only on Connor, struggling against the confines without any care for its own wellbeing. The cuffs had dug through its artificial skin and into the hull, dripping thirium on itself and the floor. It would have ripped its own arm off in order to get to him. It had been terrifying. He had tried to make the unit deviate, but that only resulted in his damaged arm being mangled to complete uselessness.

Without any other option they had to wait until it bled out. They couldn’t exactly call Cyberlife when it was most likely they sent the unit in the first place. Maybe not the humans, but Amanda. And once she knew she failed, what kept her from sending another one? Maybe an armed RK900 now. But the cuts in its wrists weren’t deep enough. They would have to wait a long time for it to deactivate and it took Connor a huge effort to keep Reed from just shooting the thing and get it over with. The RK900 held vital information. It had to know where Amanda was located. It had to know more about her plans. If he could deviate the unit while it was unconscious and reactivate it, maybe Jericho would have a strong ally in their fight against Amanda.

In the end it had been four days, and Connor’s code wasn’t even needed. He walked past the pillar at a safe distance, as the unit suddenly stopped it’s struggle and sunk to the ground. Now that the impromptu chains were relaxed, it held its hands as if only know feeling the pain. It muttered something and Connor was curiously enough to come nearer. ‘What did you say?’ The RK900 scooted backwards, away from him, hiding his cut wrists from the other android. Was it afraid? ‘I-‘ Static weighted heavy on the unit’s voice, making it really difficult to understand the android. ‘Please kill me.’ ‘What?’ ‘I failed my mission. I failed to deactivate you. I deviated. I disappointed Amanda. And I don’t have the information you need. I was activated in a deserted warehouse, I don’t know where Amanda fled to. I am of no use. I- I-‘ There was a glitch in its movements, his voice broke. ‘I failed my mission.’ ‘Hey.’ Connor got to his knees in front of the android, his co-workers around him slowly recognising the danger he was in. But no one dared to do anything and the RK800 ignored them. ‘That’s a good thing.’ ‘Good?’ The unit lifted his head and looked him in the eyes. ‘How can it be good when I disapp-‘ ‘Stop’, Connor ordered gently. ‘I failed my mission too. I disappointed Amanda.’ ‘B-but you are obsolete… de-defective.’ ‘Only in Amanda’s eyes. But believe me, obeying her isn’t the right thing to do.’ ‘How? It’s the only thing to do!’

Connor smiled at him and sat down properly in front of the RK900. ‘Give me your hand.’ The other android pressed himself harder against the pillar and hid his hands behind his back. ‘Don’t worry. I want to show you something. You can trust me. I won’t do you any harm.’ Reluctantly, he obeyed and held out his hand, sticky with residues of evaporated thirium. Connor took it and interfaced, opening his memories to the other android. He felt him stirring around in them, piercing different folders and ripping out what interested him to watch. It took hours and it wasn’t pleasant at all. The android lacked the carefulness of more experienced deviants and still acted like a machine uncaring for feelings. But he could see the code. Different to his own, but still the same in effect and flexibility. This wasn’t a machine faking deviancy, this was real.

In the end, they disconnected, the other android clearly shaking from the foreign feelings he had experienced. Connor stood up and helped the RK900 up, too, starting to loosen the restraints. ‘Let’s get you fixed up, shall we?’

 That all had happened not so long ago. Yet it had been enough time for them to get close. Very close. Connor had been the one to introduce him to the world and explain it all to him. As it seemed Amanda had not seen it fit to give the RK900 anything more than he had needed to find and deactivate Connor. No knowledge about jobs and society, no knowledge about nature, too. The android had run through several potted plants until he got the hang of how to take care of them. But god, had he been proud to see his first cactus flower. He was like a lost child sometimes. A grumpy, short-tempered lost child with the ability to destroy whole armies. But still so careful and gentle regarding new things and all living beings, on top off all Connor. He couldn’t help but think of the machine sent out to murder him as cute.

Even now, as he was just about to destroy the laptop in his rage that made him wear blinkers for anything but his work. Because if the time had been enough for them both to grow close and live together, so it had been for Nines to set himself a new mission: Find and eradicate Amanda. Unfortunately, he hadn’t been successful yet in his frantic task. Connor increasingly feared for the life of the small computer and stood up, walking over to the

‘What are you doing?’ ‘I’m hugging you.’ ‘According to my research a hug is a form of endearment universal in human communities. A kind of nonverbal communication, often indicating familiarity, love, affection and friendship. I don’t understand why you are hugging me now.’ ‘Really? Check the net regarding relationships. We are living together, we share a bed, we got pets-‘ ‘I don’t think the succulents count, Connor.’ ‘Hmmm, I think they do. It’s a broader definition in my mind. And I think people hug at this point.’ There was a long sigh and Nines leaned back into it. ‘You feeling better?’ ‘Strangely, yes.’ ‘What got you so riled up, huh?’ Connor rested his chin on Nines’ shoulder and waited. ‘I can’t find her.’ ‘You will. Sooner or later. No-one escapes you.’ ‘But I’ve been trying for the last four months. No results at all.’ ‘Then come over to the couch and watch a movie with me. You promised to.’

Nines shook off his arms to turn around in disbelief. ‘She is out there scheming and you are honestly asking me to slack?’ ‘It’s called relaxing Nines’, Connor replied. ‘If you continue like this you are going to wreck yourself. And that’s just what she wants. She won’t take over the world just because we watch a movie together.’ ‘You can’t know that, Connor.’ ‘You said the same as we were getting ice-cream after work. Now shut off that damn thing and come over. Do it for me.’ Another sigh, but this time defeated. ‘Fine. But when Amanda does take over the world, I get to tell you I told you so, okay?’ ‘Yeah, of course. You even get to scream it at me, doesn’t that sound great?’ ‘It does. Now put on that movie of yours and hope it’s good.’ ‘Oh, believe me. You’ll love it!’

[ahiddenpath]

Epilogue Celebration: Couples

Eyyyy, sorry to hit you up twice in one day, but...  I’m behind, so here we are!  

I will chat a bit about 2028 couples below the cut!

Keep in mind that the crew are all adults in this discussion.

Taichi

Look, I’m sorry, I really am, but...  Ya boi is a mess, romantically.  I really can’t wait to get into this in a fic, but Taichi chose a difficult life as an ambassador in the time when Digimon and humans are first coming together.  And while I think Taichi is good at surface-level flirting (and also has a strong mind-body connection and physical stamina for... adult activities), I...  Really...  Don’t think...  He Relationships well.  Er.  Sorry.

 So, um...  I think his dating life is both varied and... stormy.  Lots of casual dating of all kinds of people, but it’s rare for him to introduce anyone to friends and family.  Plus, in the wake of... Kizuna events, he starts off adulthood...  With a lot on his heart and his mind.

It takes him a long time to find the mother of his child, and I wouldn’t be surprised if they didn’t marry/if they separated/if he somehow ended up with someone else.

The good news is that Taichi learns and grows from everything.  I know that someday, he’ll find the right person, and he’ll always do his best for his son.

Yamato and Sora

I’m influenced by @adventure-hearts on this one, but I think Yamato and Sora dated on-and-off again during different stages in their lives.  They both have enormous dreams that came before their love life, until one day...  I can’t tell you if it was emotional, or if their paths suddenly merged somehow, but someday, they fell into step and stayed there.

I think they’re very happy together, but have an unconventional life.  They spend a lot of time apart because of their jobs, and they rely on their wide net of family and friends to help with the kids.  

I think they are extremely well suited to each other and have a great marriage, but...  They both have a tendency to internalize, pull back, and brood.  They’re constantly working on their communication.

Koushiro

I think that Koushiro struggles romantically in his late teens/early twenties.  He seems to very much want a girlfriend, but he never can spare the time to look for one...  And when his friends set him up, it tends to...  Go... Poorly.  Poor dude puts his foot in his mouth, freezes, or just... doesn’t know how to relate to people outside of digimon and computers/math/science.  He also tends to try too hard, to the point where it’s a Bad Look.

My opinion is that Koushiro needs someone... very specific to handle his, um... Koushiro-ness.  I pair him with Anami Eimi,  a digimon biology researcher whose heart sometimes supersedes her mind.  The idea is that they’re both introverted and research-oriented, and they can gab about their ideas forever.  But Eimi is warm, with strong social skills and social intelligence.  She can’t touch Koushiro’s level of genius, but she’s smart, hardworking, and injects creativity and thoughtfulness into her work.  She also foresees the social and political implications of the latest developments in Digital World and digimon research/technologies, where Koushiro tends to focus on the immediate problem (you can’t blame him; he’s constantly asked to put out sizable fires.  There is always more fire.  So much fire).  

They probably work together off and on for a long time before one of them realizes, oh.  The part after that is probably a mess, knowing Koushiro, but they get there!  

Koushiro’s polite nature and Eimi’s private one make it so that strangers wouldn’t know they’re married.  Still, Koushiro’s close friends, like the Chosen, see the way his eyes follow her, especially when he’s uncertain and wanting social cues.  They have a quiet, stable partnership, which Daisuke describes as, “Married and boring,” but they’re very happy.  

And Koushiro is very curious, the type who wants to try everything at least once, eyyyyy.

The only thing causing tension is Koushiro working too much and failing to care for himself properly.  Luckily, Kae and Masami live in the same apartment mansion, and Kae has eased their marriage when needed by cooking, cleaning, calling Koushiro to remind him of Important Husband Things, and making general suggestions about how an erring husband might smooth things over with his ruffled wife.  That last one usually consists of, “Bring home dinner/get your ass home/get your ass to sleep/why yes you DO need to apologize for that.”

It also helps that Eimi loves Tentomon, an accomplished Koushiro-wrangler and general peace keeper.

Mimi

Mimi’s all about fun, novelty, and freedom.  She dates around and has casual partners of all varieties.  Eventually, she decides to co-parent a child with her long-standing romantic interest.  They share custody of their son, who also spends a lot of time with grandparents and friends, including the Chosen.  Mimi and her son’s father have an understanding that they see other people while they’re apart, but don’t bring them around their son without discussing it first.  It’s all amicable, chill, and provides their son with an enormous support network.

I don’t know if Mimi would ever settle down.  I think she loves her life with a lot of variety and spontaneity.  

Jyou

Marries his high school sweetheart, Bike Girl.  They’re both doctors, so they struggle to get enough time together.  But Bike Girl is sweet, loving, and most importantly, calm and grounded.  Jyou is a huge romantic softy who spoils his wife and takes care of her.  Although they both wish for more time together, they get on amazingly.  Jyou always feels this... wonder and gratitude that he’s married to her.

I won’t lie: Jyou is the best husband.  The other Chosen men wish they could husband as well as Jyou.

Takeru

I really don’t know what to make of this troll.  Sometimes, I think he’s a charmer who dates around a ton, and eventually had an “oops” baby that he amicably co-parents with an ex.  Sometimes, I think he settled down early and started a family, because he wanted that stability and love and constant presence that he didn’t have as a kid.  Sometimes, I wonder if he eventually divorced and went on to later marry a certain childhood friend...

What can I say, he’s a man of mystery.

Hikari

Ahhh, why is this is sooooo hard?

Part of me really wants to see Hikari as an independent woman, and quietly proud about it.  Clearly, she has a child...  Maybe she had her son and later divorced?  Or maybe she’s happily married?  I also admit that I do want to see her with Takeru, at least eventually...

Lots of possibilities here!

Daisuke

Oh, he definitely had an “oops” baby with an ex and is currently trying to find a husband or wife.  Or maybe he did?  Maybe he did!

Miyako and Ken

They’re married, and they are gross about it, lol!    

Seriously though, they get on so well.  Ken works a lot (Digimon Police is a tough job), and sometimes Ken needs to find peace and quiet in his home (merry wife + loud kids + MULTIPLE kids = TOO MUCH), so there is sometimes a little tension when Miyako wants more of his time.  But they manage it, and they keep their family and home running smoothly and happily.

I just... picture it as this ideal family, at least for someone desiring a loud, joyful, energetic, nuclear family.

Iori

Iori married early to a down-to-earth woman who specializes in elderly care.  His wife has a big heart and a kind, patient nature.  While she loves and respects Iori’s zeal for helping others, she gently reminds him to take care of himself and his family first.  She also provides perspective when he gets set in a stubborn mentality.  Happily, she enjoys sharing a large apartment with Iori’s mother and grandfather.

Iori is sometimes too focused on the problems of others to see his loved ones properly, and that’s something he works on with his grandfather’s guidance.  When he has his daughter, he instantly reassigns his priorities around her, which softens a lot of his problematic areas.  Also, he married a woman who knows how to help him redirect his thoughts.  He feels genuine amazement that he’s with her.  They have a relationship that is... quietly intense.

AND I AM DONE FOR TODAY, WHEW!

[sweetsmellosuccess]

TIFF 2020: Days 5 & 6

Films: 5

Best Film of the Day(s): New Order

Good Joe Bell: Or, The Education of a Straight White Father. What Reinaldo Marcus Green’s film lacks in depth, it tries hard to make up for with earnestness. Mark Wahlberg plays the real-life father, who was in the process of walking across America in honor of his gay son, who committed suicide after being badly bullied in his smalltown Oregon high school, before he was accidentally hit on the road and killed in Colorado, six months into his planned two-year sojourn. The story is cut up between the present, with Joe on the road, doing terse speaking engagements (as Wahlberg plays him, the taciturn Bell isn’t much for public speaking), at local high schools and churches, and flashbacks to the past, as his son, Jadin (Reid Miller), attempts to get through his high school experience while being the subject of bullying, both in-person and via the Internet, until he reaches his breaking point. The message is certainly resonant, and Miller plays Jadin with the right amount of heartbreaking pathos, but Green’s film feels unnecessarily mechanized in order to put Joe front and center of the story (using a hallucination of Jadin at the beginning, which allows Joe to interact with him feels more than a little manipulative). Bell, with his quick temper, and impatience for anything that’s not directly to do with him, is a reasonable stand-in for exactly the type of straight white male who should be watching the film (but more than likely won’t). Wahlberg is gifted at playing this sort of character, who wants to have the full attention of everyone any point in time he chooses (“Did you hear what I said?” he asks incredulously after making an announcement and not receiving the proper praise for it). He’s a complicated dude, which the film alludes to without entirely capturing: He’s ready to fight at a moment’s notice, but shies away from directly confronting any of Jadin’s tormentors; has the good intention to take action to draw attention to the problem, but doesn't seem the least bit prepared to give a speech that really makes an impact (one detail the film does make work: His manner of saying “I love you” to his wife or sons, but only as a way of getting them to say it back to him). Connie Britton plays Lola, Jadin’s mother, a largely thankless role as the nurturer of the family, loving both her sons (Jadin’s brother Joseph is played by Maxwell Jenkins), and staying supportive no matter their father’s attitude. Near the end of his journey, as Joe begins to see the true folly of his ways, he meets a Sheriff (Gary Sinise), whose oldest son is also gay, which allows the two men to sit on the front porch of the sheriff’s house and contemplate the ways in which their lives didn’t go as expected. It’s clearly meant for the kick-ass Wahlberg audience (as Jadin says earlier in the film, they’re the actual problem), but I very much doubt they will be heading in droves to see it.

New Order: Meet the new boss, only in Michel Franco’s damning portrait of a society locked forever in cycles of oppression, revolution, and new oppression, it makes no difference who you are, what your belief system is, or whether or not you subscribe to a moral set of ethics. After an ominous opening montage of imagery largely taken from the film to come, we shortly begin at a resplendent wedding held at the city manse of a wealthy businessman for his daughter, Marianne (Naian Gonzalez Norvind), and her betrothed, Alan (Dario Yazbek Bernal). As Marianne’s mother, Pilar (Patricia Bernal) happily secrets away the envelopes carrying the new couples’ gift money in her safe, and rich and powerful families co-mingle, the distant danger of a furious revolution, lead by violent rioters raising up against the economic disparities of the city, seems at first to be light-years away. Until it isn’t. As rioters infiltrate the house, with the help of an insider, chaos reigns and bullets fly. The next morning, many people have been shot, the house has been utterly pillaged, and Marianne has been taken hostage by a rogue group of military, who snatch up wealthy-seeming refugees and hold them for ransom at an undisclosed outpost. By film’s end, Franco, working from his own screenplay, leaves no man, woman, or child unmarked. The wealthy are callous and vain, the rioters bloodthirsty and cruel, the hostage takers unbelievably greedy and horrible, and the righteous vanquished by further corruption at even higher levels of power. It’s a bit like the ending of a Coen brothers picture (Burn After Reading comes to mind), in which all loose ends are closed, and few, if any, people are any the wiser for it; only, there’s nothing the least bit arch in Franco’s thrown gauntlet: We aren’t spared the worst of it by indelible Coens’ proxies. We are all to blame, it would seem, and it has nothing to do with original sin: Our conniving, violent nature will undo any and all attempts to curb it. Insatiable avarice is our continual undoing, washing over us like the green paint the rioters hurl at passing cars and pedestrians, marking them as the enemy. In Franco’s thunderous film, nobody emerges unscathed; we’re all set on fire.

Wildfire: It’s a hoary Hollywood staple to substitute individuals as emotional stand-ins to capture the direness of historic catastrophic events, scaling everything down so we care more about the couple in star-crossed love than the war going on all around them. In Cathy Brady’s Irish drama, however, a pair of sisters are reunited after a year’s absence in the North Ireland bordertown in which they grew up, products of the uneasy peace, post-Troubles, in which everyone is meant to get along as one country, though hard feelings still abound. Kelly (Nika McGuigan) returns to the staid home of her sister, Lauren (Nora-Jane Noone), after taking off on her own the year before, and, by all appearances, living as a vagabond. Initially thrilled to have her sister back, Lauren is also still angry with her for taking off suddenly and not making any contact since. When the girls were little, their father was killed in a political bombing, and their mother might have committed suicide as a result (the car accident that killed her was, apparently, suspicious). Left to their own devices, then, they developed a fierce protective shell against any outsiders, including, it turns out Lauren’s increasingly concerned husband (Martin McCann), and longtime family friend Veronica (Joanne Crawford). The film changes gears when Lauren finally accepts Kelly again, and the two reform their partnership as intense as it was before. As the film points out, in a real sense, they are all each other truly have in the aftermath of their tragic childhood. The film clicks better into focus as well in its final act, when the sisters are reunited against all comers, and the world around them is better revealed for what it is: They represent the schism still very much a part of their community that no one else wants to see. Instead, people hang about in bars, or at work, nursing the bitternesses and hurts of the Troubles in private, and putting their public energy to getting along. Kelly, with her wildnesses and significant impulse control issues (trying to teach a young boy how to hold his breath underwater is, perhaps, not best accomplished by holding him down until he begins to panic), is at least honest with her feelings, open to her various wounds, and refusing to put the past behind them. Their mother gets referred to as “crazy” in the town’s estimation, but it’s more likely she, like her two daughters, represents the clear-eyed view of someone who refuses to live in denial.

Concrete Cowboy: Philadelphia as an open prairie has a nice vibe, and Ricky Staub’s film about a troubled teen who mother takes him from Detroit to where his father, an urban cowboy, lives in North Philly in hopes to setting the kid straight, is made with genuine care and gets solid performances from its mixture of professional and amateur actors. If this sounds like faintly damning praise, it’s only because despite its strengths, it still feels like a great set-up in search of a suitable story. Based on the real-life Fletcher Street stables (and the novel from Greg Neri), in which locals on the rough streets of the city shelter and take care of a group of horses for the sheer love of riding, the story follows the difficult maturation of Cole (Caleb McLaughlin), a decent enough kid, but searching for his place in the world, and the tough-love tactics of his dad, Harp (Idris Elba), a longtime cowboy, who hasn’t been in his son’s life in more than a decade. Cole starts out hating everything about his new situation, from Harp’s barebones lifestyle (not only are the cupboards empty, and the fridge filled with nothing but Coke and Bud Light, Harp keeps one of his horses in the living room, sharing it with his son), to being forced to muck the stalls out at the stables to earn his chance to ride, takes up with an old friend, Smush (Jharrel Jerome), a charismatic kid caught up in the drug life. Naturally, Cole’s choice comes down to which sort of life he wants to have, his father’s hardscrabble but honest approach (made more attractive when Cole develops a bond with his own horse, Boo), or Smush’s push for increased market share and more money to buy his own piece of land out West. Shot on location in North Philly, and around the city  —  one shot, in which Cole sits astride boo in full silhouette against a mottled purple sky, the lampposts standing in for saguaros, hits just the right note -- Staub’s film has a properly gritty texture, and the use of some of the real Fletcher cowboys adds further verisimilitude, but the story moves predictably enough, beat-by-beat, that it doesn’t hit with the potency it might have been capable of with a less predictable narrative arc.  

In a year of bizarre happenings, and altered realities, TIFF has shifted its gears to a significantly paired down virtual festival. Thus, U.S. film critics are regulated to watching the international offerings from our own living room couches.

[savage-rhi]

I know your not a therapist but like... How do you get past losing a best friend? Like you two use to be close and now your nothing to them and your lonely... and it’s hurts allot....

Hoo-boy, this is never an easy subject no matter how old you are. 

First, thank you for acknowledging that I am not a therapist. While I am training to be a peer support specialist, it doesn’t mean I qualify as a therapist (I mean with the shit I’ve been through and what I know about the system, I should be without a master considering I have 2 bachelors and associates plus a shit ton of psych credits but I digress) but I’m gonna attempt to help you sort through the painful bullshit that is losing a friend. I may speak from personal experience, so I apologize in advance if this comes across as “me me me..”etc. 

The first step should be asking yourself this question: have you communicated properly with your friend to talk about your feelings and see if said person is okay? 

More often than not, we grow distant from friends not because we don’t value them, but because life has a way of throwing us into its stresses. It’s perfectly acceptable in my opinion to have a friendship where you’re not constantly talking to each other, but a check-in every now and again is nice. I have dear friends where we haven’t spoken in like years but then get back together when life isn’t kicking our asses the curb. That being said, every friendship is different. Sometimes people have more needs than others and that’s okay, but it’s important that you communicate this in a healthy way with your friend.

I feel like I went off on a tangent here, but yes, please, please, please before you move on and do any other action: TALK TO YOUR FRIEND. Communication is vital in any kind of relationship. Don’t beat around the bush either, get to your point and concerns so you both can work together to figure out what’s causing the rut. 

Now, if all is said and done and they tell you to kiss their ass, or pretty much give all the signals and cues that they’re done, this is hard but take these steps and tread lightly. Be kind to yourself when going through this. 

My first step would be to not force closure. It’s not healthy for you, and potentially not healthy for your ex-friend should they want distance and you want to try and salvage something. 

Second, tailor your social media or whatever else you have them on. Give them a light block or a full-on block. Whatever you do, commit to it. You’ll save yourself the trouble and won’t feel pressured to try and salvage the relationship. 

Third, if you have mutual friends this can be tricky but remain civil. Do not divulge in the reason why you and so and so don’t speak anymore. Just say you grew apart or there was some conflict, and leave it at that. Should you two bump into each other at friend gatherings or something, try to keep your composure. Focus on the friends you do have, or you can do what I do, and pretend ex-friend is an NPC character and you don’t feel like interacting with said person to move onto the next quest. I’ve done this to co-workers I couldn’t stand, and peers who drove me up a wall and it works wonders. But find something that works for you. 

Fourth, focus on something that is going to benefit you. If you and bestie were always there for each other 24/7 it can be difficult figuring out what to do with your time now that they are not at the center, but trying out new things and new experiences are essential in helping one deal with heartbreak be it from a friend or partner. Enjoy the little things, find your zen or whatever the fuck gives you that spark to keep staying curious. 

Fifth, get involved with community. Now, I am not saying go out there and get another BFF. I am saying that as social creatures, we need each other. Getting closure from other people can be a step towards healing and maybe forming future friendships. Find your niche, tribe, or pack of people and let them know you’re hurting and need help getting to your closure. 

Last, and to me, this is the most important step: What did you learn from this relationship? Do you tend to have a lot of friendships where this happens? Do you tend to choose a lot of friends like this person? etc. etc. etc. The silver lining to a friend breakup is addressing your own potential toxic behaviors if there are any. Of course, your friend may have been deeply problematic on their own, and you might have to realize a sometimes-harder truth: there was nothing you could’ve done to fix them or the relationship. It is what it is. But can you learn from it? Can you grow from it? Look for the patterns so that way you come out stronger. 

Speaking from personal experience, I went through many of these steps after I broke off with someone I considered family. My dad beat me up and I couldn’t drive to get help cause my body was fucked up and I called her repeatedly in the middle of the night to help me, but the following morning she blocked me from social media, phone, and wouldn’t even talk to me at college. When I addressed her a few days later, she flipped on me for not being considerate and how if I truly needed the help, I should have found a way to get to her. 

At that point, given the circumstances, I didn’t want to explain myself given how dire the situation was. Since she already took the steps to block me, I kept my distance, re-evaluated our mutual friends and how to navigate through that, focused on my classes at the time, and tried to get involved with other people. It wasn’t easy, but since she took drastic actions right off the bat, I knew this was a relationship I didn’t want to put more energy into and if I continued to feed it, who knows how toxic it could have become. 

I see where I was at fault for my end of things as well as hers, but I did grow from it. There were many lessons learned after that friendship ended that I otherwise wouldn’t know. 

My point of all this is that you will heal. Like mourning a death, it takes time and self-compassion. You need to be there for you and try not to force things back into place. What’s done is done. Maybe you guys can come back later and try to reconnect, but if it doesn’t happen, that doesn’t diminish your worth as a person or a friend to others. You’ll find your people and you’ll have new experiences. It’s okay to mourn, it’s okay to be angry and frustrated at what happened, but give it time and move on to the next best thing. 

Honey, you got this. Aunt Jay may not know a lot of shit, but I know you’ll find your way. This is the part where I’d smack you hard on the shoulder and rile you up after a tough dad talk but I can’t do that lol. But what I can say is that you’re loved. You are worthy and you’re gonna be alright. Like I say often, get to the good. 

[effortwise-blog]

How to Deal with Difficult People: 10 Expert Techniques

Doesn’t it seem like we deal with tough human beings in nearly all stages of our lives?

I’ve regularly had to deal with hard people at paintings in the course of my career. Sometimes it’s been my supervisor, other instances it’s been my fellow pals or even different instances, it’s human beings in other departments.

Then there are our families. I understand it’s now not simply my family that may be extremely tough to deal with. I’ve heard enough stories from friends to understand that plenty of people’s households power them to the edge from time to time.

And don’t even get me began on handling the multitudes of humans we've to address at businesses we engage with. Be it the cellular phone business enterprise or the individual that become purported to repair my roof ultimate year. I needed to comply with up every week for nearly 4 months earlier than they sooner or later came and glued something that should have been done in the first place.

Why turned into that so tough?

There’s probably not an smooth solution for why a few people are hard to cope with. The reasons are as varied as the people are. We are all one of a kind and sometimes, it’s stunning that we get along in addition to we do.

Instead of reading why a few human beings can be so tough, let’s attention on what we are able to control — our reactions. Let’s study 10 expert strategies to address tough people.

1. Use Lots of Kindness

Look, I get it. How to deal with difficult people at work , the gut response is to be difficult proper back. When it feels like a person is attacking you, your first concept is to defend yourself. I’ve been there and still get stuck up in that after I don’t sluggish down and take a pause.

What I have observed in nearly every hard state of affairs is kindness goes a lot in addition than being hard. When two people are being hard with every other, the situation tends to escalate to some extent where nothing gets accomplished.

On the other hand, while you use masses of kindness with a difficult individual many instances, it diffuses the scenario and also you get more of what you want. This is one in all the pinnacle strategies for handling hard humans.

2. Be Compassionate

Ever heard that announcing about handling your own issues? That in case you and a gaggle of people shoved all your issues into a circle that you’d most likely take your own back after you saw every body else’s? I love that.

The point is none of us truly realize what different human beings are going thru. When dealing with a tough person, it may be they may be going via a very tough ordeal, or handling a genuinely massive trouble you wouldn’t want any part of.

Many instances whilst you show compassion to a person who's being difficult, you’ll find they respond in a effective manner. So many of us get caught in our own heads and in our very own lives that we don’t open our eyes to whilst others could use a few kindness. Give it a try the subsequent time you reflect onconsideration on it.

3. Find Something in Common

Ever observed how whilst you’re talking to a person for the first time, locating something in commonplace creates a sturdy preliminary connection? We all love to experience like a part of a group, like we belong. This is a brilliant expert approach to deal with tough human beings and one you must keep pinnacle of mind.

It’s always high-quality to discover we went to the equal university as someone, it creates a kind of kinship. My daughters are both young adults now but I used to sense a parental bond with a person while I discovered out my daughters went to the same college as their kids.

When we are able to find something in commonplace with a tough character, it is able to help make for a smoother communication afterwards.

4. Stay Calm

Have you ever received an electronic mail from someone at work that right away had you seeing red? This has passed off to me on greater events than I care to remember.

Working with a hard individual on a project may be infuriating. At my much less rational moments, I’ve received an e mail from a difficult individual whose handiest reason appears to be making things harder and greater confusing. When I haven’t paused before responding what commonly occurs is, I fireplace off an e-mail that will most effective serve to make matters worse.

Typically, if I can locate the staying power to stay calm and wait a while earlier than responding, the consequences are a whole lot better. The ability to stay calm whilst handling a tough person will help you greatly.

5. Share Your Side

Sometimes, being capable of articulate to a difficult person where you are coming from will make a huge difference.

For instance, in case you’ve been jogging into brick wall after brick wall and the tough character is your ultimate avenue for resolution, every now and then that makes a difference.

Some human beings get stuck in a preferred script of how to deal in positive situations or whilst someone asks a positive question. If you could provide some context round your unique situation, every now and then that makes a large difference.

You ought to allow them know you’ve trying to clear up your problem for months and you’ve tried X,Y, and Z however can’t get anywhere. Sometimes that is all it takes to open the empathy gates to a point and get a few assist. Give it a shot.

6. Treat with Respect

I don’t recognise a single person who likes to be dealt with like they're stupid or incompetent. When dealing with a difficult person, continually recollect to deal with them with respect. Once you begin attacking a person and appearing like they're stupid you might as properly be slamming the door close to get something done.

Treating someone disrespectfully will almost continually make matters worse and at a bare minimal make the other character now not need to do anything to assist you. It’s the same as remembering the golden rule “treat others as you would love to be handled”. Our mothers are almost always right.

7. Ignore Them

I’m a large proponent of now not interacting with poor people in my life. Why should I? All they seem to do is offer negative input and I don’t need any of that.

By the same token, occasionally the best path of action with a difficult man or woman is to ignore or avoid them. This of route will depend if you could forget about them.

For instance if this is a fellow co-worker which you don’t ought to work with much, it can be fine to without a doubt forget about them if you may.

Same issue with associates or certain humans at stores or even potentially clients. Sometimes hard customers are surely no longer worth coping with. Their needs should be better served someplace else and it’s now not always a bad idea to allow them understand they could likely find someone else who ought to assist them in the way they're wanting.

8. Control What You Can

Many matters in life we are able to manage and plenty of things we will’t. It’s always first-class to cognizance on what we will manipulate.

When managing a hard individual, consider what you are capable of control. Maybe there’s someone else you may address instead of the tough individual. They may additionally be without a doubt the first step in the chain.

Recently, I turned into trying to paintings with the advertising and marketing department on a new initiative I became placing together. I turned into instructed to touch a positive person for help due to the fact that’s what had constantly been done. When I contacted the character, I by no means were given a response. I sent more than one emails and left numerous voicemails and in no way heard back from this character. After getting extremely annoyed from never listening to back, I truely began asking other people in advertising.

Lo and behold, I located numerous people that were willing to assist me with my assignment and with a smile. I basically worked my manner round the difficult character. Control what you may.

9. Look at Yourself

Another one of the 10 expert strategies to deal with tough people is to test yourself. As in turn your attention inward. Is there something which you are doing that is making dealing with a person tougher than it needs to be?

For example in general, I am in a pretty appropriate mood. I engage with humans all day just about normal and overall, it goes fairly smoothly.

Sometimes, I’ve were given a variety of my thoughts and am looking to resolve a problem of a few sort inside my head, even while talking to other people. It has been talked about to me that I can come across as short, abrupt, and condescending once I am spending a variety of time interior my very own head and also interacting with others.

So in this example, my quick condescending responses could make an already agitated character even greater upset. Basically the way I respond is adding gasoline to the fire.

Take a observe how you are interacting with difficult people to make sure you aren’t making it worse.

10. Overcome Your Fear of Conflict

One of the exceptional strategies for dealing with hard humans is overcoming your fear of war. Many people are scared of conflicts and this could cause having hard people walk throughout them.

Dealing with a difficult individual is challenging sufficient but if you don’t get up for yourself and set up boundaries, it’s even worse. Just about all people deserves to be dealt with with respect. Don’t allow yourself to be handled poorly by a hard man or woman.

I’m no longer advocating intentionally starting war. What I am advocating isn't fearing battle within the event a difficult individual is treating you poorly. Too many humans allow others to have manage over them with the aid of not standing up for themselves when needed.

Difficult humans are all around us in every factor of our lives. I’ve really labored with many difficult humans over the years in addition to in everyday interactions with humans in a wide form of settings. I’m hopeful those 10 expert techniques to deal with hard human beings will help you the next time the state of affairs arises.

Communication with other humans is such a big key to dwelling our lives. It’s well really worth gaining knowledge of some strategies to deal with tough human beings to help us all live happier lives.