#and it’s so damn hard to find good ones too

[spacexgrl]

Bittersweet ! 🎀

mdni <3 you’re here pt 4

series masterlist 💋

~ in which Ellie breaks up with you and you go a little crazy ~

ex! ellie williams x fem! reader , abby anderson x fem! reader

college au!

warnings: suggestive/ kinda smutty, angst, break up, cheating,cursing, toxic behavior, smut in future chapters, sexual themes<3 feminine and girly reader ,not proof read!!

taglist: pls comment if you want to be added! <3 @elliessweetheart @lonelyfooryouonly @vamp1reg1rrrl @autisticintr0vert @morphids @amsxdoll @addthespaghetti @mangoxxred

You couldn’t recall the last time you had such a good night sleep. The alarm you set the day before pulled you out of your peaceful slumber when Abby sneaked her arms around you from behind giving your tits a gentle squeeze. A small laugh escaped your lips as she wouldn’t let you out of her strong grasp as you tried to get out of bed.

“wanna shower with me?”

Abby answered with a simple nod and left soft kisses on your shoulder before letting you go. You undressed before her and made your way into the bathroom with her following your steps, taking in the sight of your beautiful figure damn..she couldn’t wait to fuck you from behind.

You let out a sigh of relief as the hot water hit your body, “here let me get that for you” Abby massaged your vanilla body wash everywhere, she made sure to accidentally roll your nipples between her fingertips and grind on your ass in the process. You decided to return the favor, grabbing on her beefy biceps, feeling on her built stomach lowering your hands past her damn V line dangerously close to her pussy but never initiating anything. “ Fucking tease” Abby rolled her eyes as she lowered herself cupping your ass as she picked you up pushing you against the glass door of the shower making your pussy grind on her hard abs. You lost yourself as your lips found hers ,your hands tangled in her wet locks while hers gripped on the fat of your ass, carving her hand prints on it. “fuuck Abby-!”

“love the sounds you make baby..so beautiful when you say my name”

you were putty in her hands, too weak to resist her charm..

just as you were about to ask for more you heard your phone ringing from your bedroom it was probably your best friend asking if you were skipping classes again…to yours and Abby’s dismay your intimate moment was cut short damn cockblock..but you made sure to get back to it as soon as possible.

You quickly dried yourselves and changed into some new clothes, you just threw on your favorite baby pink juicy couture tracksuit, some mascara and strawberry flavored lip gloss, “you’re so pretty baby” Abby said as she changed into her sweats from the night before, she didn’t really care for her outfit today because she had practice later anyway. A small blush creeped on your cheeks at her words.. She looked so delicious, you believed she could be wearing a trash bag and still look fuckable.

“i was about to say take a picture it’ll last longer but you probably saved my entire instagram profile already”

“fuck off anderson”

you bickered as you followed her outside to her parked car, she opened the door for you and got into the drivers seat. She’s such a gentlewoman. She pulled out of your driveway and searched for the nearest starbucks near you on her cars obnoxiously big built in screen.

“sooo what’s the deal between you and Ellie?”

you looked at her from the passenger seat, taking in her features her side profile is so beautiful you wanted to sit on her nose so fucking bad..catching a glimpse of her biting the inside of her cheek, thinking of an answer.

“ I drunkenly admitted that i find “Ellie’s girl” hot at some party months ago. Someone spread the word and now i’m her arch nemesis. I don’t really care for her it’s a one sided thing. Besides i never tried anything with you..’m not a homewrecker.”

she’s right, she never did. You remember asking Abby for help on one of your assignments since you shared a few classes so you met at the library the next day ..yes she had definitely had a few chances to snatch you away from Ellie, but that wasn’t her style.

That resulted in a big fight with Ellie why would meet up with her alone?? Are you cheating on me? Ellie accused you of cheating on her every time you interacted with Abby. You waved at her yeah you’re cheating , you greeted her back in the hallway fucking cheater , you just looked in her direction wow just say that you’re in love with her. It’s laughable that she’s the one that ended up cheating on you. You should’ve seen that she was projecting her actions on you.

Abby listened to you as you vented to her about what Ellie did. She couldn’t believe it. Ellie’s a fucking idiot she thought..Abby will definitely get back at her somehow. Should be easy enough if she’s already feeling threatened by Abby’s raw existence.

“yeah…and sometimes she acted like you’re the worst person in the world as if you killed her dad or something that’s how she made you look.”

you laughed at your own jokes while Abby pulled up into the Starbucks drive-in and ordered your usual drink and something to eat, she insisted to pay because you were too busy fooling around in your shower instead of having breakfast and it was her fault so she made up for it. “thank you Abby, you’re the sweetest” You thanked her with a wet kiss on the lips, the taste of sweet strawberries and you matcha vanilla latte lingering on hers..she made sure to take a picture of your drinks in front of her steering wheel, showing off the flashy logo of her luxury car,tagging you in her instagram story so you could repost it.

You gladly did.

“anything for you baby..”

a few minutes into your drive to Uni your notifications were going off uncontrollably. Abby smirked, eyes still glued on the traffic in front of her. Just as she expected.

46 missed calls from ‘Ellie Williams DONT ANSWER’

are you fucking kidding me

we’re broken up for less than 24 hours and you hangout with anderson

what the fuck

the fuck is wrong with you

did you fuck on our bed?

fucking answer me

pick up your fucking phone

busy fucking in her car now?

didn’t know you were a gold digger

be honest i’m better than her

she looks like she can’t fuck

i can’t believe you

anderson of all people

you just had to choose her

‘Ellie Williams DONT ANSWER’ is typing…

you put your phone on silent at this point , Abby scoffed as you read the messages out loud to her, mimicking Ellie’s voice when she was pissed. You were unbothered, you had a good laugh with Abby as you made fun of Ellie’s childish behavior.

Yeah she was definitely regretting letting you go…you almost felt bad for her.

cry about it 💋

you answered before blocking her number.

🎀

to be continued!!

[untoldstar]

male yandere! streamer x gn! fan reader

feeding your parasocial relationships🫶

was tempted to make him a username called masonjar but whateves let’s just stick to a classic name.

got inspired by the post I saw by @blood-smiles !

warnings: parasocial relationship (kinda from both sides) jealousy, yandere themes, obsessive behavior.

Mason was an insanely popular streamer the type to have both guys and girls fawning over him, edits of him with people thirsting over his good looks but despite the sheer amount of fans he had, you took the liberty of naming yourself his biggest fan.

somehow you ended up being noticed by him, it started with him noticing you in his streams and comments and then seeing you in every single one of his meet-and-greets. Always wearing his merchandise, your account only had a select few pictures of yourself that drowned in all the posts that centered around him. He couldn't help getting curious, you were just so loyal and obsessed with him that he thought it was adorable.

he started chatting with you, the way you freaked out when he messaged you was so cute, he had a grin stretched on his face the entire time. Because of his active interaction with you you became known to his other fans and gained popularity.

he was having thought of meeting up with you frequently, maybe even a few collabs..this could be a big break for both of you!

but as time went by it seemed like you were just...moving on.

you didn't interact with his socials as much anymore, missed more streams than the ones you watched, even your content started to stray further away from him. You either didn't post as much or you were posting about other low-stream influencers who didn't even compare to him. He was popular, good looking, and skilled. Everyone on the internet loved him and you were lucky enough to get noticed by him and you're just throwing it away?!

he knows it's silly and that he shouldn't care but you were his loyal fan..did it mean nothing?!

truly you were moving on, Mason has a special spot in your heart but your interests were changing. It was a habit of yours where you get obsessively hyper-fixated on something or someone and then hop on to the next thing.

you didn't do anything wrong you honestly thought Mason forgot your existence but the spam messages that filled up your inbox later proved that that is far from the truth.

Mason: so what you just got bored of me huh?

Mason: you were drooling over me just two weeks ago and now you're over here praising someone else?!

Mason: answer me

Mason: why aren't you answering me?!

Mason: are you too busy obsessing over a new guy to even send a text back?

his jaw clenches and his hand shakes from the tight grip he has on his phone as he almost burns a hole into the damn thing from staring at the screen so hard while waiting for you to see your messages.

he gets fed up and sets his phone down and put on his headphones getting ready to start the stream.

he acts normal in front of the camera but his eyes keep sliding down to the comments trying to find you there. He tries to mask it by reading and replying to other people's comments even though he doesn't truly care.

he only wants your eyes to watch him.

your praise.

your devotion.

surely you'll come back to him..won't you?

[littlemissshoei]

TREEHOUSE || Mr. Machete x Gn!reader || homicipher

story synopsis: You meet a strange, lonesome monster as your search for a way out of the eerie complex. Little did you know there's more to him than that tough exterior he shows.

content warning: mr machete x gn!reader (no pronouns used), spoilers to mr machete's route and ending (with some non-canon stuff added) strangers to lovers, mr huge face being a little (huge) bitch, mentions of blood, continuation of his endings, Mentions of mr Hood, Crawling, Mrs Chainsaw

word count: (1.9k)

inspired by "treehouse" by Alex G and Emily Yacina

YOU DON'T REMEMBER how much time had passed ever since you woke up in the strange building complex. The awful headache you started feeling as soon as you opened your eyes was making it hard to concentrate, and the room was nothing but a blurry mess. You were accompanied by the soft buzzing of something, yet you weren't curious enough to find out the sourch of the irritating sound.

When the pain finally subsided you stood up, scanning the dimly lit room for any sort of familiarity, not even slightly surprised when you found none. How did this even happen? The last thing you remembered was dumping another body into that eerie so-called ghost apartment. Everything after that was as good as wiped from your memory.

As you wandered down a hallway, a strange, crawling creature made its way towards you, causing the adrenaline to kick in and your legs to start taking off on their own, leaving you breathless in another room. Your chest heaved as you looked around, feeling your throat burn as the aftermath of that ear piercing shriek you let out. It wasn't until a little while after you calmed down that you noticed the hooded figure in front of you.

Before you could freak out again he extended a hand, helping you stand up. While he had no face, you could still make out the worry he felt through his actions. He let out a few unfamiliar sounds, but stopped as soon as he noticed your eyebrows scrunching in confusion.

His finger pointed towards you, followed by a strange yet familiar word. "you" Trying to imitate the gesture you lifted your finger, pointing it towards yourself. As you did that, he continued, pointing to himself. ”me"

You repeated the gestures, doing your best to imitate the words, and once the man was satisfied he nodded, taking a step back into the room. You hadn't expected him to start teaching you words, but you were convinced it would come in handy. Soon enough you found yourself repeating after him, seemingly ready to continue.

AS YOU WERE about to walk out of the room, a strange figure appeared next to the man you called "Mr Hood." You franctically pointed in the reaction, hoping he would notice, but it dissapeared not long after he glanced to his side.

Although you were frightened by the encounter you continued forward, coming across entities and monsters of all kinds, some friendly, some strange. One of them was Mr Chopped, who you helped out. You took a liking to him, one of the few things that felt truly normal.

During your journey, you also met the creature that caused you to jump into survival mode. You decided to name him Mr Crawling, as that was what he did. He stuck by your side as much as he could, even going as far as helping you find the severed head that damned child had hidden against his will. It was risky, but worth it, seeing Mr Chopped smile as the kid held him out to him.

You knew the building's outlay would change the more time you spent down there, but you were determined to make it out, even if it meant wandering around endless hallways for God knows how long.

Things weren't looking all too positive though. During a moment of overwhelming emotions, you lost sight of Mr Crawling, leaving you all alone and vulnerable. You had to run away from hungry creatures, and even a giant head. But just as you stumbled upon a seemingly new part, a strange whistle caught your attention. You looked up, meeting eye with an unfamiliar creature.

You could tell he was mocking you from that cocky grin playing on his lips, and soon enough you found yourself in another messed up situation — making it out in one piece all while avoiding his terribly big machete! You barely managed to dodge it before he stood right in front of you, hand clasped around your throat. You felt yourself growing dizzy with each passing second, as as you finally collapsed onto the ground an overwhelming urge to kill that stupid guy enveloped you. You felt yourself growing bigger, stomping left and right in hopes of hitting your target.

HE WAS VISIBLY surprised by your switch in attitude, intrigued even, bur before you could even proceed what had happened, the giant head you had been on the run from showed up, whisking you away into a room.

"Dammit!" You groaned, pacing back and forth, thinking of a plan to get out. You even stumbled upon Mr Gap, whose irritating request only worsened your situation. Give you his heart? Did he really think you were that stupid? As you closed the from which he appeared you sighed, catching a glimpse of something in the corner of your eye. It was... A machete?

One moment you were in the room, and the next you were on the run alongside Mr Machete, someone you wouldn't have expected to show up to your rescue. Nevertheless, you were glad to meet a familiar face.

Once the two of you made it to a safe spot you stopped to catch your breath. Curiously, you tried striking a conversation with the individual before you. “Why help me?” You asked, reciting some words you had learned over the course of your stay, hoping he would understand. He simply shrugged. “You funny.” What a weird way to put it. Since he seemed in a good mood you decided to continue the topic. “Know other world?”

His curiosity seemed to have been piqued by your choice of words as he shook his head. “Me not know.” He replied, before asking a question. “Seek other world?" Finally everything was going well! You nodded. “Me seek exit” He hummed thoughtfully as he suddenly started walking again. “Me help seek.”

Knowing it wouldn't hurt to have someone accompany you down these crazy hallways you smiled, following behind the tall individual. You certainly had not expected the radical change in his behaviour, but it was relieving to know he wasn't trying to kill you anymore.

Aside from ocassional, unimportant questions there was a pleasant silence between the two of you. But things couldn't be calm for too long as an overwhelming sound reached your ears. Your eyes widened as you backed away a little, watching as Mr Machete reached for his weapon. “Monster close. Hide." he exclaims, his tone slightly commanding. You squeezed your eyes shut, and the sound of the door slamming open was followed by a scream and other strange noises. Your eyes opened, and you were met by a gruesome scene, the machete piercing a strange, feminine entity. “Monster gone. You safe now.” He replied coldly, watching the blood seep out of her body.

You offered him a smile, thanking him. His lips formed a thin line, and you noticed an open wound on his arm. Before he could continue walking your hand reached for it, causing him to quickly turn around, confused. “no walk. Stay.” You said, reaching for the piece of bandage you had received from Ms Nurse. You had stuffed it into the pocket of your rain coat, perfect for situations like this. Although his eyes weren't visible, you could tell he had a puzzled look in them as you carefully wrapped it around his wound, securing it.

He tipped his head slightly to the side, watching your face as you smiled again. “Good?" You asked nervously, hoping you hadn't upsetted him. The silence lingered for a little longer before he lifted up his uninjured arm, ruffling your hair. “Grateful.” He replied, resuming his usual grin. You felt relieved knowing he appreciated it, and the two of you continued your journey.

THE LONGER THE two of you walked together, the more you started to figure him out. Mr Machete was very strong, but even he knew his limits. Whatever could be pierced by his machete was a guaranteed win, but if it were to go through it — like it went through a ghost they encountered — he immediately fleed, admitting that not everything can be fought with brute force, meaning that you sometimes need to acknowledge nothing can be done. His rough exterior might be scary, but deep down he seemed like a nice guy, and his actions proved towards it.

You weren't all too happy when he threw you across that gaping black hole towards the other side, but it was better than having him leave you behind. He even tried to throw you considerately as to not hurt you. Things were going well until you stumbled once AGAIN with that huge faced idiot. You were seperated from Mr Machete and forced to fight him on your own, and it went surprisingly well.

After your fight you felt yourself growing dizzy, and in his own peculiar way Mr Machete showed worry. “You okay?" He asked, approaching you. With all the power you had left you shook your head. “No blood.." You said, voice faint and almost inaudible. “Blood?" He repeated after you. You rambled on in human language, believing he wouldn't be able to understand you, yet you didn't expect the otherwise cold Monster to slice a deep cut into his uninjured palm, allowing you to drink his blood, ultimately saving you from a black out.

The gesture while a little rough made you realize that he might've started caring about you, and the two of you headed out towards the elevator you noticed into the distance.

YOU DON'T REMEMBER how much time has passed ever since Mr Machete and you arrived into this strange place filled with endless hallways that seemed to have no exit, but in all honesty, you didn't care. As time passed, the two of you became closer. You wandered around daily, some days filled with talkactivity from his side while other times it was you that rambled on. It was pleasant knowing you were comfortable around each others. What started as a way out of that horrible place ended in a relationship you had never expected to have.

And for him, he hadn't felt the way he feels about you before. He wasn't used to showing emotion, nor was he used to feeling them, but he liked it. He had to admit. he only went along with you in hopes of finding a new thrilling experience, but maybe that wasn't as important as it seemed anymore, he had you now after all.

Day in day out the two of you got closer and closer, understanding each other better with each passing moment, and while the memories of the others seemed so distant, fading away deep inside your mind, the warmth you felt each time Mr Machete held you in his arms was so close yet so far, stuck together for an eternity and beyond, unsure of what the future would hold for the two of you. Not like that mattered, as long as you had each others, everything was going to be okay.

Right now you were cuddled up against him, his arms tightly wrapped around your waist as he kissed down your neck. “You pretty." He whispered into your ear as he kissed up. You smiled, you could never get enough of his compliments. “Me grateful.” You replied, already imagining that huge grin on his face. “Me love you.” He continued, letting a yawn escape his lips. “Me love you too. Rest, now?" He hummed in reply, and soon enough you found yourself entering the dream realm with your beloved by your side.

[confiaenanaa]

Can I request an angsty one where the reader and Marshall/Em/Slim (whichever you prefer) they have an argument and at one point he tells her he doesn't need her, he can have whoever he wants and they won't complain about anything like she does. And obviously she feels hurt bc it's always been an insecurity of hers that he could have anyone. And he just confirmed her fear. Hopefully with a happy ending tho🙏🏻❤️ please and thank you! Sorry it's so long lol.

needed - eminem

fem!y/n x Marshall Mathers

masterlist

synopsis: Marshall says he doesn't need her, but what does he do when he doesn't have her?

warnings: cursing, drinking

A/N: loved this request! very fun to write. if you guys want anything written, my asks are open. hope you enjoy!

-Fuck you! 

-Oh, piss off!

Shouts could be heard from the Mathers residence that night. Y/N and Marshall were arguing over something stupid, again. They seemed to be having these arguments more and more often these days. This time, however, they were arguing over Marshall’s lack of communication. He’d have a bad day, be rude to Y/N, and when she’d ask what was wrong he’d blow up at her without telling her what bothered him. Today it seemed like he’d had an extra bad day. 

…

He got home from the studio later than usual. Y/N was reasonably worried, and when she called, he wouldn’t answer. So, once he got home, she asked him a ton of questions; questions like “where were you?” “what happened?” “are you alright?”. This angered him to no end since he hates explaining himself to people.

He refused to answer questions. Y/N knew he’d probably just had a rough day so she decided to make him his favorite home-cooked meal and some hot cocoa and treat him to a lovely night at home. But, when she brought him his food and drink, he just told her he wasn’t hungry, even after seeing all the effort she was putting in for him. 

That’s when something inside of her just snapped. She set the plate and mug on the table fecklessly, spilling some cocoa in the process. Marshall seemed a bit startled, knowing Y/N doesn’t usually throw fits like this and she usually keeps her temper in check. 

-God, Marsh! Would it kill you to at least give me a thank you? I’ve tried so hard to find out what’s wrong, and you won’t tell me! What happened to me being your #1 and your best friend? And come on! Look at this meal I made for you! Can’t you see how badly I want you to let me help you? 

-Fuck! I’m sorry I’m not living up to your boyfriend standards, Y/N! But, clearly, I had a rough day so just drop it! 

-You know what Marshall? I have bad days too! But you don’t see me bitching about it and acting like a little kid every time something doesn’t go my way! And even when I do feel upset, I tell you what’s wrong! Because I actually care about your feelings and I wouldn’t want you to worry!

- Oh, so, now I don’t care?! All I ever do is care about you Y/N! I write songs about you, I buy you everything you look at to make you happy, not to mention I make you feel pretty damn good!

- It’s not about that Marsh! God, are you even listening to me?! I don’t care that you’re upset, or that you’re in a bad mood or feeling mean; I just want you to tell me! I want you to communicate with me! I want us to work through our problems calmly, without me having to shout to get your attention!

-You always say that, but you never actually do it! Whenever you’re upset you just stay quiet! So don’t go telling me how to deal with my problems because you sure as hell don’t know how to deal with yours!

-Fuck you!

-Oh, piss off!

-Fuck, Marsh! This isn’t about me! We can work through what I do, but you seriously need to stop! 

-Stop it, Y/N! Stop already! If everything I do is so terrible and wrong, then why not just break up with me already? 

-Because I love you! I care so much about you and I just wish you could see it.

-You’re just saying that because you know I don’t need your ass. You know I can get with whoever the hell I want and they won't criticize me or complain about everything I do half as much as you do!

Y/N stayed silent for a bit. Her heart dropped and she could feel the lump develop in her throat. All this time she was with Marshall, she’d had her insecurities. But, he helped her work through them slowly. He helped her make sure she knew he’d never hurt her like that.

But, now, all that hard work was out the window. With those simple words. The tears began to prick her eyes and she looked down at the floor to try and conceal it. She felt like a little girl being yelled at. She felt helpless, and small. The man who was supposed to love her the most, to protect her, had failed her. He made her feel alone.

Marshall instantly felt a wave of regret wash over him. He felt it surge from his mind up to the tips of his ears down to the points of his toes. He looked at the girl he loves, knowing how badly he just hurt her. He opened his mouth to apologize, knowing he’d gone too far and he didn’t mean it; but, before he could, she had walked past him and into their bedroom. He quickly turned on his heels to follow her. 

Y/N was grabbing a few of her things: a hoodie, her phone charger, some gum, her earbuds, and some shoes. He once again tried to apologize but she wouldn’t hear it. He followed her all the way down to the garage and watched as she hopped in her car and sped off. He wasn’t sure where she was going, and, to be honest, neither was she. 

She hated herself for complaining and she hated him for being so mean to her. But, deep down, she knew she loved him more than anything and everything. She gripped her steering wheel harder, and turned up the volume of the song she was listening to. 

She pulled into the parking lot for some random bar she heard of from one of her friends. Her friend said it was the best place to go if you’re feeling sad or having a rough night. 

When she walked in, the bar looked exactly how she felt. It was dimly lit, the smell reeking of alcohol and cigarette smoke. There were barely enough people to call a crown in there, all sitting far apart with a drink in hand. Everyone looked glum in there, so she’d blend right in. She sat at the bar and ordered herself a few shots of rum. She downed them quickly, not feeling much different. She then ordered herself a vodka, which she kept refilling until the bartender just gave her the bottle. 

She kept feeling her phone buzz in her pocket. She assumed it was Marshall. She didn’t really want to respond, but she still looked, just in case. It was actually a text from her best friend asking what happened. Of course. Marshall texted her friend to see if Y/N was okay (since she usually goes to her best friend in times of need). Y/N decided not to answer, she was in more of a “fuck the world” kind of mood.

She set her phone down on the counter, finally feeling the effects of the alcohol. She wasn’t sure how she was going to get home or if she was going to get home at all. Before she could continue that thought, she saw a series of texts, making her phone buzz repeatedly. 

The contact name read “marsh :)”. She truly didn’t want to speak to him at the moment. She wasn’t sure why what he said affected her this way, but it did, and he knew that. She knew she was probably just being sensitive, but she couldn’t help but feel attacked. 

She looked at her phone again and saw Marshall’s concerned text chain.

“hello?”

“babyyy??”

“look baby i’m so sorry i know i messed up big time. please call me back so i can fix this.”

She didn’t bother reading the rest. She got more texts from him and her best friend. They seemed really concerned now. It was unlike Y/N, not answering the phone. It was cold, far too cold for someone of her character. However, Y/N wasn’t in the mood or the headspace to care about her character. She was too busy trying to keep her head upright as her vision blurred a bit from the effects of the white russian she was creating in her stomach at the moment. From that point forward, she couldn’t really recollect anything that had happened. The next thing she knew, she felt a pair of strong arms lifting her up by the waist and into their arms bridal-style. 

…

The next day, Y/N woke up in her bed alongside a snoring Marshall that had his arms wrapped around her tightly. She slowly shimmied out of his embrace, head beginning to pound when she stood up. She went downstairs and sat at the kitchen table with a small tonic for hangovers in hand. 

As she was washing the cup she was just using, Y/N heard a set of booming footsteps as they pounded against the wooden staircase. She turned around to look at Marshall. He looked incredible. His hair was a bit tousled and his eyes and lips were puffy. He came down and approached her without a second thought. The first thing he did was put his lips against hers. The kiss was warm, brilliant. 

Y/N crumpled under his touch. He pulled back and smiled slightly at her. His heart grew seeing her in front of him. He smiled even wider when he saw her smile back; however, he knew he wasn’t forgiven just yet. 

-Wait, look, I gotcha something.

He quickly walked into the living room and grabbed a small box and turned to the kitchen.

-I bought this a while ago. I wanted to give it to you somewhere better but this seemed like the right time.

Y/N opened the little box gingerly, a little nervous to see its contents. Her jaw dropped a tad when she saw it. 

A small ring, diamond encrusted and the exact type of metal she wears. It was perfectly tailored to her tastes. She looked up at him, eyebrow slightly raised.

-It’s a promise ring. I know what I said last night was fucked up but I didn’t mean it at all. I love you more than anything and you know that. I could never be with anyone else knowing that you’re out there in the world. 

He took the ring out of the box and secured it onto her finger. He then kissed her hand softly. She smiled taking in the view.

Then, she knew, more than anything, that she was truly loved.

[girlwithadragonheart]

I need to yap desperately about one single gripe I have with this game. MAJOR MAJOR MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD read at your own discretion

The first half is me ranting about how much certain things mean to me and how impacted I was, and the actual gripe comes closer to the end.

I'll preface this by saying this post is about Varric's death and my rage and despair regarding it, but more so about my Rook's.

I've seen people who said they picked up on the hints about whatnot, who knew before the Fade Prison. I was not one of those people. I was so relieved when I saw him after the Prologue that I didn't think twice, because I knew that it would destroy me the second shit started going wrong.

I was already not having a good time when I started the game simply because Varric was getting older. I don't handle aging well or death, and his design showing his age, and the comments he would make about "getting too old for this" just made my heart break.

And then shit got worse. I sobbed disgustingly when that knife went into Varric's chest.

After Rook woke up from talking to Solas and she heard Varric, I was so gods damned relieved. And my Rook was better taken care of by Varric in that year she spent with him than she was in the rest of her entire life.

I cried from the end of Ghilan'nain's fight until the romance scene and on and off after that. I got so used to visiting Varric just to be comforted by his presence. Inquisition was the biggest part of my life for a year and a half when I was just a kid.

I did really bad middle school age writing for it but regardless of the quality, those characters were built up in my head becoming even more than they were in the game. Varric was my biggest support character through everything I was going through at the time.

I don't talk about it much, but I didn't have a great childhood, and I know a lot of people didn't, but I coped with it through writing and video games. Varric was the one supporting me through the abuse I suffered and writing was the way I processed how bad things really were.

When Rook was in the prison she said "What am I going to find here?" And Varric said "I think you already know, kid." I DIDN'T until he said that. The second he said that my entire chest tightened and I just said "No" out loud as I watched Rook find his body.

Now for my real complaint!!!

Rook never gets the chance to grieve Varric. They go from talking to him every day to finding out he's dead and it was all a lie. I have personally never been more fucking pissed at Solas than I am now. But Rook comes back and they have that kind of "closing off" scene with Varric's empty bed (which was so hard to go through btw). And then they fuck their pookie LIKE I CANNOT BE THE ONLY ONE UPSET ABT THAT

FYM I gotta find out my dad is dead and then Rook is up for boning like there's no fucking way unless it's to cope. And at least pertaining to the Lucanis romance, Rook is processing everything that happened and they can say "So much has happened, I just don't know how to feel."

And rather than getting to process that in some kind of way, the devs said nah this scene serves one singular purpose, and Lucanis says "I do" and then dicks them down.

Personally, I felt very dismissed despite being overjoyed about finally having the romance scene, I couldn't even enjoy it with everything that happened prior.

Rook deserved the chance to completely break down after everything they went through. Tbh i don't know how they kept it together. Varric said "don't get all misty eyed" and i thought to myself that's way too delicate a term for what's happening here, I was fully ugly crying.

Fuck your "I had a good run" I still need you bitch.

All this to say I'm very upset, and I'm running my second playthrough and every time I look at, hear, or talk to Varric I tear up again. Wtf Bioware.

Rook should've gotten the chance to actually talk about what Solas did to them, especially in the sense that he made them believe Varric was still there. Or at least get to properly grieve the person who was their closest friend for a long time.

I have very strong feelings about this obviously

[malereadermaniac]

Totally non-toxic behaviour ~ Ex!Dabi x Male Reader

Reader who's just a smidge toxic towards his ex - but it's like fine! m!reader (no genitalia mentioned) / FDNI Word count: 884

Dabi asking for his hoodies that he'd left with you back, only for you to try every trick in the book to make him think about you~

For one of the jaded man's sweatshirts, you decided to sleep in it for a week and spray your signature perfume on it. The second Dabi grabbed the black top from you, he took it to his nose and immediately gave you a chilling stare; he didn't voice any complaints though, just gave a brief 'thanks' and left. What you don't know is that the scarred man huffed on that thing all the way back to his place, and didn't wash it for literal weeks; he would just smell it whenever he felt that empty feeling in his chest which you used to fill for him.

When Dabi texted you about another hoodie of his, he did mention that "You coulda washed it before giving it back" - guessing that your smell made him miss you a bit too hard... So that time, of course you had the decency to wash the damn thing..... it was just that you'd accidentally spilt some of your body wash in with your fabric softener; so not only did your ex's hoodie smell like your clothes, but also you.

Another time, you decided to try make the cold man jealous by handing him the wrong clothing and saying "oops... not yours?". That one really set him off. In the moment, Dabi laughed it off and went and found the pair of sweats he was actually looking for, but GOD DAMN did this man go crazy on his way home. We're talking talking to himself in the car, extreme road rage for absolutely no real reason, and conducting a deep social media stalk on you to try n find out who's fucking sweats you tried to give him!

Your break-up wasn't exactly civil, but you and Dabi both agreed that you needed to end things or you two would just keep being bad for each other. Don't get it twisted, when it was good, it was incredible - you and Dabi were seemed like the perfect boyfriends, just simply in love. The taller man would always pamper you and was like a puppy around you (with an attitude but he'd listen to you nonetheless). Dabi was happier than ever when he was around you, you filled that hole in his chest, you were the missing piece to him. It's just that Dabi would get insanely possessive over you because you meant so incredibly much towards him - and we're talking not being allowed to go out with friends without him, literally getting into fights with other guys who were close with you and much, much more. And you yourself weren't innocent either! You would flirt with people to get attention from Dabi if he had been more frigid that day, and you were partial to a little guilt tripping if it meant getting what you wanted... But breaking up because of the bad definitely didn't negate the good - so you two are stuck being apart, whilst still being fucking in love with each other!

Dabi still having notifications on for whenever you post a story, because he was so down bad for you that he wanted to always be the first to see you stories (and sometimes approve them....). But his already cold blood runs colder when he sees that you've posted a selfie with some muscular, tatted arm around your shoulders as you lay your head on whoever this guy is. Dabi must've rewatched that single story of your at least fifty times, just staring, internally screaming, trying to figure out whose FUCKING ARM THAT IS. And of course, it's just you trying to make the man jealous (and it working). Good thing your friend from childhood was visiting, cause he made the perfect fake soft-launch!

Light stalking is another one of your tactics when trying to occupy Dabi's thoughts (and succeeding). It's never anything crazy! Just showing up at parties he's at and making sure that he notices you - which is usually done by openly flirting with guys at said party. Sometimes, if you're bold (and drunk) enough, you will just straight up flirt with Dabi's friends - never if he's with them in that moment, but always when he will notice. And it works like a CHARM! It does help that all of Dabi's friends find you hot as fuck, they're willing to risk getting their heads burnt off if it means getting to hit it from the back yk! They always start off with a coy "Dabi wouldn't be very happy to see me talkin' 'ta you" but they never mean it. And holy shit is it a sight from horny heaven to see Dabi walk over to you once he notices you antics; his taller, muscular frame looming over you and whoever your flirting with, his arms folded to show off his muscles even more, his eyes narrow and burning a hole into your own. Whenever you push enough of his buttons, Dabi will almost always fold, and he's not proud of it! The man just can't help it, he knows it's bad but he just loves waking up in your bed the next morning~

[starfxkrinc]

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jj said you spooked him sometimes. not ever on purpose, but you were so quiet. moving around the house swiftly on the tips of your toes to the point he never heard you coming.

“keep spookin the shit outta me and im gettin you a bell.” he laughed when he said it, pinching your cheek with a goofy grin before we turned back to the table he was setting up. so you didn’t think twice about it, not when he jumped out of his skin when you brushed past him in the kitchen or when he let out a yelp when you appeared in his vision as he worked on your car.

but you could sense his growing frustrating—his laughs turned to scoffs and his smile was tight when you gave a half hearted apology. it wasn’t your fault, you’d always been quiet.

you guess the last straw was the other night. jj woke up at 2am to you not in bed, so he searched for you, you weren’t in the bathroom and you weren’t in the kitchen, chugging a jug of strawberry milk. his heart raced, you had to be there somewhere and it wasn’t like you to disappear like this. by the time he checked outside to still not get a glimpse of you he was panicking and breathing so hard his vision tunneled.

only for him to let out a loud “fuck!” when he got back to your room and there you were, buried under the pillow, asleep again. the next morning you told him you walked right behind him, standing in the doorway and you figured he just needed fresh air.

it took him an hour to settle his heartrate enough to sleep. and in that hour he made a decision.

jj had to get it right, so he snatched one of your necklaces off the counter, tucking it in his pocket as he made his way to the general pet store, nose crinkling at the familiar pet smell. it didn’t take him long, finding a collar with a little bell on it, small enough to sit in the base of your throat, the actual collar was just big enough to be comfortable.

when he took it to the cashier, she made a comment, “didn’t know you got a cat jj. i always took you for a dog guy.”

jj shrugged, “little bitch snuck up on me what can i say.” and with a pop of his gum the conversation was over. he ignored how uncomfortable she looked after that.

getting you in it was another story—he looked too smug, hovering over where you sat on the couch reading.

“got you something.”

you eyed him warily, “got me what…”

he produced the offending item from his pocket, and your stomach churned as hill smile got wider.

“so you stop creepin around the house like some…creep.”

“no…no i dont wanna wear it.” you shook your head fast, your body tensing up to bolt, “jj you’re a dick this ain’t funny.”

“who’s laughin?”

you make it about 3 strides before he catches you, knocking you to the ground and locking your hands to your sides with his knees as you both struggle.

“c’mon, stop fightin you know i’ma win, just relax and let me. put it. on!”

you were wild—biting and scratching in an attempt to push him away, but he’s gotten stronger and he’s gotten meaner so all it takes is a palm against your face, pressing you hard into the floor for him to get it on you.

“fuck! bit the fuck outta me damn, i’m just tryna make shit easy on both of us.” jj bends the plastic of the fastener, knowing the second he gives you an inch you’ll rush to take it off.

and you do, tears of anger and frustration sliding down your face as you beg him to let you go, “just take it off please, i wasn’t trying to worry you i promise but i can’t walk around like this.”

jj’s flushed red, his face damp and sweaty with welts rising on his cheek and arm from where you scratched him, “tough titty kid, it’s for your own good.”

in a split second you go from begging to anger, cursing and swinging on him again.

“you’re a fucking piece of shit. fucking scumbag i’m not a goddamn animal i should kick your fuckin ass.”

rolling his eyes he gets up and shrugs, “you can try. at least this time i’ll hear you.”

after that you become real ornery, dodging kisses and sticking pillows between you while you slept to keep him away. jj could hear you all the time now—a soft jingle punctuated by a growl of frustration or a series of manic curses. and he looked pleased. of course he did. because he found a way to get over on you. and the scissors couldn’t cut through the thick fabric of the collar and when he caught you with the knife to your neck trying to saw it off he basically attached his carabiner to your belt loops to keep you close.

you were officially collared and leashed.

and jj could only stand the fighting so long.

“i know you’re mad at me, but you can’t stay mad.” jj muttered in between kisses to your face, his calloused hand cradling the other one to keep you close—this was as close as you’ve let him get in days, and it was only because he caught you after a shower all soft and languid. he knew he was playing a dangerous game letting his thumb rub against your bottom lip.

“fuckin watch me—stop!” he bit you. hard. right on the soft apple of your cheek before soothing it with a gentle suck.

“nope, no ya can’t. you don’t get to.” the kisses get lower, trailing down your neck as he slips his thumb in your mouth, “you’re all mine pussycat, i can do what i want.” he punctuates that with another bite, right to your clavicle and he continues to litter you in bites and harsh sucking kisses until your covered in bruises.

that makes you bristle, "no i'm not."

"no?"

"fuck you, i'm not."

gripping your thighs he pulls you closer, and he smirks when he spreads you open. even in the low light he can see the dewy pout of your cunt.

"right."

you barely even fight when he pushes in, all rough and claiming like he has something to prove. maybe he does. because your squeezed tight around him in a way that makes him feel crazy, like you don't wanna let him go. because he's just as much yours as you are his. because you're just as desperate as he is. you missed him. kissing him with sharp teeth and clawing him closer until your pressed so tight you can't tell you you end and he begins.

the room quickly becomes a cacophony of sex-- filled with the wet squelch of your pussy and strangled moans from the back of jj's throat. even when he presses against your stomach to make you whine, even as he grunts into your neck with his teeth bared and his tongue laving over your throbbing pulse point.

nothing's louder than the little bell jingling at the hollow of your throat.

[actuallybridgetjones]

so long (worst!wolverine x reader)

warnings: +18 minors do not interact, smut, fluff, female!reader, worst!wolverine, change of events, after d&w.

a/n: hi! since d&w got on disney+ i just had to rewatch it and had this idea. please note that this is my first fic ever and that english isn’t my first language. also, i can’t write wade accurately so here is my messy attempt. sorry in advance for any mistake (or if this seems to messy) and feedback is much appreciated. love, carol ♡

you and logan had a life together, both teacher at charle's institute. your relationship with him blossomed through late sleepless nights in the kitchen, when you listened to the older man, appreciating the little he shared with you everyday.

it was evident that you two grew close as each day passed. after lingering touches and stares, stollen kisses in empty classrooms, you eventually got together and boy, were you happy.

you had it all, you knew each other like the palm of your hand. you were logan's harbor and he was your safe haven. you saw how he would get when the nightmares were too much, feeling the urge to drink his worries away. you saw his flaws and his sins and still you stood by.

that's what made logan wonder at first. it made him wonder how a girl sweet and kind like you wasn't terrified by the thought of him. he would often even wonder what kind of good thing he did to have you only listening to him in the first place.

so, when that tragic night came, logan got reminded of how he didn't deserve any good, how everything of his always had a way to be taken, ruined. he was coming home from the bar, a solo mission went wrong, he decided to stop to drink it away before collapsing in your arms. he knew you would be home, you were always home.

until you weren't.

he got to the mansion to find it filled with dead bodies, jean, scott, storm, hank... everyone, it was a blood bath. logan's first thought was you. running into your shared bedroom, he searched, spent days looking through the damn corpses but there were no traces of you, nothing for him to mourn over.

logan turned to alcohol and self hatred, his healing abilities now appearing as a curse, as if nothing was hard enough to numb him from the pain of it all.

the day wade (or whatever was his name) came in saying that he would take him out of there, logan didn’t even flinch. if he didn’t have you, there was nothing holding him back to his timeline.

here he was now, storming in to help deadpool, the guy who gave him a second chance, stoping cassandra with the time reaper. his mind was filled with memory of the journey he had gone through, but not only.

through his head flew images of you. your smile, your eyes, your small almost unnoticeable freckles, the way your nose scrunched when you laughed and the way your cheeks always seemed to turn a warm pink shade around him. images of you underneath and on top of him, holding him or sleeping tightly in his embrace. memories of slow mornings tangled on each other and late nights spent panting.

after all was safe and sound, after wade’s world was no longer endangered, logan gave himself a second chance too. he let himself be friends with wade, agreeing to live with him until he figured something out. he always did.

wade, cheery as ever, took logan to his building, wanting him to meet blind al, the so infamous roommate. after climbing up the stairs logan feels a perfume he hadn’t felt in years. he turned to see you shuffling through your keys, trying to enter the apartment. you didn’t even have to turn his way.

it was you.

logan stood frozen, trying to figure out if this was another one of life’s tricks to him.

“peanunt, that’s y/n, she’s a sweet girl, but you’re literally drooling you nasty dog” wade says, and that’s when you turn to the two men, hearing your name coming from the mouth of your chatty neighbor.

the sight in front of you made your heart stop. was it your logan? could it be? or was it just another nightmare about the love of your life, just for you to wake to an empty cold bed?

your brows furrow as you look at him. he was older, thinner even despite his still very defined muscles. you were sure this was your logan from the way he looked at you, his hazel eyes seeming worn over but with the same love inside of them.

“lo-logan?”

“y/n?”

your breath hitched on your throat as tears fall down your face. you run to logan, wrapping your arms tightly around him. if this was a dream, you wanted to hug him for one last time, to atleast try to feel his embrace, his touch.

logan hugged you back, bringing your smaller body to his chest as he crouched to whisper, crying too. “is this really you? y/n, oh god”

you pull your head back to look into his eyes, meeting his hazel orbs.

it was your logan.

“i-i can’t believe…” your voice comes out shaky, small even as you look at the man. dirty, rugged and with stains of blood everywhere, but he was your man.

“oh darling… god darling girl” his voice is small too, contrasting with his own appearance. you wrap your arms securely around his neck once again, crying in pure bliss as his large arms came to wrap around your waist.

“i missed you so much” you say between sobs against his neck. “how-how did you get here?” he asks, finally finding all of his worries dissipating in your embrace.

“on the night of the attack… a portal opened and I came here, I had no idea how to go back, how to go back to you lo-” you say almost out of breath, feeling his hand now softly combing through your hair.

logan pulls back to look at you in the eyes, his fingers brushing softly against your cheek as he whispered “beautiful” and brings his lips to yours.

there’s no point in denying the hurry of the kiss, the desperation and the longing cursing through your veins. of course there’s always someone to wreck the party.

“peanut? honey? am i missing something or are we starting to make out with greasy strangers in the hallways now?” deadpool’s voice interrupts.

logan grunts and turns back to him, giving him a glare. “she was, is, the one i told you about” the wolverine says surprinsingly soft.

you smile and add shyly “he’s the one i told you about”, logan looks at you tenderly, a reminder of the love still in him. the love that he had burried deep down after that night.

“honey? you had no will to tell me that THE MAN YOU WERE FUCKING NASTY BACK IN YOUR TIMELINE WAS THE WOLVERINE?” wade adds excitedly.

you and logan both roll your eyes, you blush and turn to your neighbor. “i don’t know if he was going up to meet blind al, but i’m going to keep him for the night”

“don’t make too much noise”

before you pull your long lost lover inside with you into your apartment he turns back. “hey, wade�� thank you”.

after that he was on you, door closed as he pinned you against it, arms wrapping around you, your own traveling down the hoodie he was wearing. your lips meet in a searing kiss, his tongue not taking much time in entering your mouth, joining your own in a slow and long known dance.

this was home.

“my bedroom his down the hall” you say between kisses and logan pulls you to wrap your legs around his torso, bringing you to your own bedroom. once you’re there he lays you against the bed gently, taking off his hoodie and moving to remove the tank top you were wearing, nothing underneath.

“what a fucking sight” he whispers, the rough tone contrasting with the love his gaze held, his eyes turning a deep shade of forest greeen now. reaching down, he kisses your neck, bitting and nibbling on the tender skin under his mouth.

"i- i need you logan" you say gravely, voice filled with need and passion. you remove your jeans and panties, laying bare under him now. "what a sight, princess" he hums against your hear, letting out a soft groan as he feels your desperate hands fumbling with his pants.

not longer after that, logan was moving inside you, his movements desperate as your manicured nails dig into the flesh of his back. his hands travel sloppily down your body, massaging the soft skin.

"i love you logan, i love you" you manage to say between moans, head thrown back in pleasure as you feel your high approaching. his hips grew more erratic, your words making his need grow "you'll be the death of me darlin' " he says between pants.

you feel the familiar stretch of his large cock on you, the familiar pleasure his calloused hands bring you. but you also see the depth of his eyes. the love and longing they carry. he shifts, now kneeling as his hands grasp at your hips, tight enough to bruise.

from the new angle it all feels too much and you can't even begin to process it until it's happening. "oh logan..." you almost scream in pure bliss, your whole body convulsing as your eyes roll to the back of your head, your juices spilling all over him.

the sight is too much for logan as he cums inside of you, the feel of his warm seed filling you up, making you squirm. he collapses on top of you, his hands anchoring his body as he looks you in the eye, still inside of you. "i love you so much princess"

you can only smile, new tears threatening to roll down your cheeks as you looked at the man that was, is, everything to you. in that moment you know it'll be alright, and he knows, feels it too.

as long as you've got each other, it'll be alright.

[hainethehero]

Protective Logan

I just love the idea of Logan being secretly insanely protective over Wade, especially when he's not close by or within earshot. Like, think about it.

Wade & Logan are recruited to help out SHIELD with a [insert villain of the month here] and some SHIELD guys keep making fun of Wade when he says, "man, I wish I could be an Avenger someday. Even for a day." And the SHIELD guys just outright keep taunting him about it like, "Yeah right, Wilson. Your goofy ass is never gonna be an Avenger. You're too unhinged and definitely too ugly to be one. The newspapers and Stark Industries PR won't find you marketable or pretty enough to put on a front cover, let alone be on the team."

And Wade just laughs along with them, secretly hurt by their words but hell, he's always done it to himself, what difference does it make when other people do it? It's not like they're wrong. He knows he's hard to look at. He knows he could never be shiny and brand-new like an Avenger. So he chuckles at their digs and hurtful remarks and jokes- that's what he has a mask for, right?

And Logan, who's been silently observing everything from his corner, remains stoic and unbothered. Until it's time to leave when the mission is over.

"Hey Peanut, ya coming?" Wade calls, exiting the jet. Logan just grunts that he'll be right down and lets Wade go. The minute he's out of range, Logan rounds on the entire SHIELD team, unsheathing his claws menacingly.

"Yer lucky Wade's as good as he is because he's the only reason why your entire team hasn't been sliced to pieces right now. If you ever cross my path again, I'll flay every last one of ya, and watch ya squirmin on the ground lookin for yer guts like worms. Yer all fuckin useless, pathetic excuses for heroes and not even a million o' ya, would be worth one a' him. The Avengers couldn't hold a damn candle to him."

He sheathes his claws and leaves the SHIELD team shaking in their stupid boots, varying looks of terror on their faces.

"Hey, what took you so long? I wanna go get milkshakes!" Wade pouts, somehow managing to look absolutely adorable despite being covered by his bloodstained suit.

And Logan just shrugs, all nonchalant and lightly amused. "Nothin' bub. Let's go get ya those milkshakes."

[rocknroll7575]

The Jaunes of your AUs talking about Cinder

WM Jaune: And even when I begged her to stop she just kept going branding me like chattel

Other Jaune: We so sorry you had to go through that what about you

GG Jaune(Who's Cinder was a good guy and would have been a sister in law from Adam):Uhhhhhhhhhhh

*WM!Jaune After revealing the shit he went through with his Cinder*

Sunshine!Jaune: Oum... I haven't met my Cinder yet but yours... I mean dear brothers...

KoO!Jaune: Yeah, I mean don't get me wrong, my Cinder's terrible and I'd kill her if I had the chance, but she's never done anything like that

RD!Jaune: I'm surprised you haven't killed her, if my Cinder was that bad, I'd kill her for sure, I wouldn't give the same fate I did with Jax.

SBBS!Jaune: Damn, guess I better watch out for this chick if she shows her face in my world! She tries anything like that to anyone, I'm bashing her skull in!

LI(N)D!Jaune: Honestly, I've been away from my world for a while, so I don't know what my Cinder's been up too, but I'd probably kill her as well for what's she's done

Sunshine!Jaune: What about you? What's your Cinder like?

GG!Jaune: ...My Cinder's actually a good person..

*All Au Jaune's look at him with shock*

RD!Jaune: Really? I kinda find that hard to believe...

KoO!Jaune: Same here

GG!Jaune: No for real! Trust me! She's one of the strongest and smartest Huntress I know and she gave her life to save my brother! She would have been so against what Your Cinder's have done! I mean she was willing to save us all by blowing herself up!

LI(N)D!Jaune: Huh... Guess there are worlds where Cinder's a good person...

*Silence*

WM!Jaune: I wish I was dead

GG!Jaune: ...

Sunshine!Jaune: ...

RD!Jaune: ...

SBBS!Jaune: ...

KoO!Jaune: Eh... Death's not chalked up to what it is supposed to be

LI(N)D!Jaune: True

Sunshine!Jaune: Hey... what about the other two?

KoO!Jaune: Oh, their universes just stared so they aren't invited yet

[maxwell-grant]

I'm seeing several popular react to the Penguin show with "God I wanna see Batman kick his ass in the next movie". Which, for a show about a Batman villain, is probably an indication of succeess

Are you kidding me it fucking rules, there's no "probably" here, the show couldn't possibly have achieved what it set out to do harder.

I've talked with people, as Episode 7 was coming out, that they've managed to strike this perfect balance between making Oz the fun engaging protagonist to watch, and making him a villain that we'll want to face justice, opposite Sofia who tread the line between his Batman Villain arch-nemesis as well as the closest the show has to a hero. The camera loves her, the costume designers and hair stylists love her, the showrunner calls her the hero of the show, production folks who go on the podcast talk about how she was their favorite character to work on, while Oz, the protagonist, only grew darker and more despised and more fucked-up as the weeks passed, as we sit through 8 hours chipping away at all of his fun and charm and wacko comedy antics and motivations and all the scruples and principles that he turns out to have less and less of, that become less and less useful to him, until he butchers them all in the very end along with the heart of the show.

As I saw it around week 6, by the time this thing was over, Sofia would demand to be received with tragic applause and heartbreak and whooping cheers and love, but Oswald would have the children of the world booing and hissing and throwing eggs and tomatoes at him, and then asking him to come back so they can do it again. AND I WAS RIGHT, and also I WILDLY underestimated the degree to which that would be warranted, and I certainly didn't expect that, for the first time in my life, I would be unconditionally and enthusiastically on the same side as everyone who posted that Arkham scene, where Batman picks up Penguin and smashes him against a mirror, as something Battison has to do in the next movie. I couldn't believe what a stab to the heart that last episode was.

I'l get into the specifics of why this worked more on the Episode 8 breakdown and, granted, it's a lot to conciliate still, it's genuinely a strange feeling to be onboard with everyone else who wants Penguin to be flattened and crushed and humiliated, to truly hate him as a loathsome monster for the first time ever even as I love him in so many new fucked-up ways. This is, make no mistake, the good version of the Joker's Asylum one-off, Pain and Prejudice, Bullies, all those modern stories that are ultimately about nothing more than reminding you of a super-duper serious evil bastard this funny little man is, stories I generally just find too dumb and reductive and ugly and tasteless and trying so very damn hard to be scary without working for it. This was Lauren LeFranc slam dunking everyone who's picked up this character since Jason Aaron in 2007, including Jason Aaron himself, and wherever they take him in the next movie, or if they can justify another season of this, they've fully set him up more than ever as a guy we will want to be exploded by the Batmobile, that he not only fully deserves it, but must, be defeated for good.

Beyond impressed, don't think I could have ever anticipated how much I wanted this.

[connorsnothereeither]

What Hozier song fits your characters?

I GOTTA PICK JUST ONE EACH?? Damn, sick and twisted /lh /silly

It’s taken me a while to cook on this but I’m answering this at an appropriate time since I literally see Hozier live tomorrow-

Ulysses (Fable SMP): Now for a long time during Fable’s run I said Eat Your Young because it really fits early Ulysses and the Telchin, HOWEVER I think in totality as a character, Ulysses is embodied best by Empire Now. The sense of pained but freeing reflection, looking back on the pain and destruction caused by empire and greed for so long, and coming away from that bringing hope for a future that might not be perfect, but will be better. A future he does get to see. Hourable mention is that Ulysses and Vesperae are Sedated coded.

Virgil (SkyBound SMP): This was trickier than I thought, honestly, for both general vibes and plot reasons I can’t go into for spoilers. The issue is almost that Virgil is a very optimistic character at his core despot his paranoia, and it’s hard finding a Hozier song with exactly the right vibe. That being said, he is, after all, a carrion bird. And he is in a world that’s falling, trying to pull people closer as it does. For many reasons, Virgil is I, Carrion (Icarian).

Daniel Thorns (Cantripped): Listen… listen we all know it’s Nobody’s Soldier. We all know Nobody’s Solider just IS DAN. Beyond the individual elements, even down to smelling like a bonfire, the constant balance between being a folkhero and being a complete mess of a man. The desperation to hold onto the roughness of life so that he’s not sanitised to the point of deification, but being so unable to truly grasp the grittiness of the world because he is inherently seen as something more, and it puts a barrier around him. Honourable mentions are Arsonists Lullaby, cause Flamewalker and the baggage he carries with that, but also It Will Come Back IS SO NEPH AND DAN. THATS THEIR SONG. THATS DANPHRUS RIGHT THERE I POINT AT IT. I SHAKE THEM.

Leopold (Terramortis SMP): Again, there’s a lot of spoilers potential with assigning Leo a song, since we haven’t seen all of his story yet. I think I want to say Like Real People Do. The urge to just sit and ignore his problems. Choosing bliss through ignorance; not asking questions, not thinking hard enough about the bugs and the dirt. Just wanting things to be easier and live a little longer. Honourable mention that Too Sweet makes me think about Julius and Leopold… 👀

C.W Hare (Wild West SMP): Again there’s some spoilers potential here. I initially wanted to say Jackboot Jump. And that is incredibly CW coded… but I don’t think it’s perfect. The same with Talk. Both are so him, but not quite it. I think the most accurate as their songs is Abstract (Psychopomp). There’s so much about it, about the grasping onto glimpses of a life in those final moments. The desperation of holding onto a life. The animal motifs too just feel perfect “I will not be great, but I’m grateful to get through”, just… it makes me think about him a lot.

Honourable NPC Mentions:

Agent Paulie A. Morris (Cantripped - Goodes): Someone New

King Morgan of Eventide (Mer SMP): Through Me (The Flood)

[hydrangeapartridge]

My completely biased review and opinion about companions in Veilguard (major spoilers of course)

(Side note : english is not my first langage, I hope I can express myself clearly enough for you all to understand my points)

- Neve

I like Neve, she’s cool. I loved the detail of the noise her metal leg makes when she walks.

Her questline was however a bit bland. We had better portrayals of power hungry blood mages in previous games and Aelia wasn’t that good an antagonist. She lacks charisma and isn’t seen much before the last quest so you don’t really care about her. It could have been more dramatic, like if we had to fight people of Minrathos being controlled, idk. Also not much about slavery.

I get that Bioware tried to make Neve’s quest like detective work, searching for clues and stuff, but for me it wasn’t that exciting, and Venatori are the mobs I like the least, I don’t like the crystals you have to break in order mechanics and stuff.

I chose to make her the hero of Minrathos and it was satisfying.

- Harding

I can’t find it in myself to call her Lace damn it XD

Of course I was happy to see Harding again after Inquisition ! She is a ray of Ferelden sunshine. I really enjoyed her questline with the Titans ; it was mysterious and you really felt the danger in the deep roads, and the potential threat of her newly acquiered magic. I liked the giant oracle and the design of the lyrium caves. It was a nice throwback to the first games.

The end scene of her quest was nicely done, with Rook trying to reach her while the whole cave was collapsing and then a group hug.

I chose the path of compassion.

- Lucanis

His accent was more funny to me than endearing (as is his signature « Mierda ») and I was surprised to find that he was soft instead of suave. I didn’t save Treviso so I feel like I missed a lot of his quest (and the decision at the end) and in the end he was OK but not that interesting to me.

There was also the problem of Illario ; the second he was introduced I smelled the family treason nd so there was no suspense to this quest. It felt like a bad telenovella.

I like that Zara had a literal blood bath in the quest of the same name. It was a cool fight.

I didn’t bring him out much but I enjoyed that he ended up with Neve.

- Bellara

Bellara is adorable. I liked her quirkiness but her dialogues were sometimes terrible. When she talked I felt like she kept repeating the same things phrased differently and sometimes I felt the itch to skip (I usually never skip dialog!).

I had high hopes for her questline because of Anaris and finding that her brother wasn’t dead, but it all flopped in the end when Cyrian got killed by being sent flying away and Anaris didn’t turn out that scary. It felt stupide that Cyrian was not dead and then really dead…

I chose to keep the Archive but that choice felt like the less impactful of all the companion choices.

- Davrin

I didn’t expect Davrin to be so brash ! I enjoyed his banter a lot and the growth of his relationship with Assan. That griffin is an absolute cutie !

His quests were cute for the Arlathan ones and impactful for the one with the Gloom Howler. I enjoyed Isseya’s story and saving the griffins.

I still felt Davrin to be a little too « jock » coded, but his banter with Emmrich and Manfred was perfect ! I enjoyed seeing the wardens again (Antoine and Evka <3) and am glad he was a true Warden this one.

I chose to release the griffin in Arlathan because my Rook was an elven veil jumper.

- Taash

In real life, Taash is the kind of person I would have trouble connecting with. They’re obtuse and a bit rude. I felt like I was intruding during the parts with her mother (it is probably the goal of those moments but it made me uneasy). I wanted to be supportive so I was but I didn’t feel like my Rook and them ended up great friends. The identity crisis wasn’t handled that well I think, but it wasn’t as bad as people make it out to be and maybe I’ll get hate for that but they come out at first more Trans than non binary given their problem is being misgendered as a girl mostly or expected to do girly things? They even say it feels right to be called a man I think I remember? (but I respect whatever pronouns she chose in the end)

I really enjoyed the dragon hunt quests however and their last quest was cool too. Their mother’s death was a sacrifice that made sense and it pained me.

Their romance with Harding was cute (mostly because of Harding’s reactions and that height difference XD)

I chose to push them towards embracing the Rivein life, even if I think they could have made peace with both ?

- Emmrich

Of course my favourite. And not only because he is the handsome older man who swept my Rook off her feet.

To give us a scholar necromancer that was the antithesis of the cliché : a man poised but a tad insecure, nerdy, gentle, kind, a bit posh, extremly elegant and whose favourite colour is lilac ! Genius !

The Necropolis had such a distinct ambiance that every quest there felt special, with amazing details and wonders of finding a wisp, a spirit or hearing a dead’s last words.

To me his personnal quests are the ones with the best handled rythm. The first one in the peace and quiet of the beautiful garden sets the tone : serious but poetic, sad but hopeful, and dares to tackle very real and grave subjects. Death and regret but also life and love are perfectly handled in his story and brought me lots and lots of feels.

There is a great antagonist whose motives are simple but dangerous ; a friend turned rival, similar but so different from dear Emmrich. Johanna is simply iconic (her hand gosh and the fact that you keep her skull in the end, brillant). The fights are well balanced, the cutscenes and dialogues perfect for immersion. And don’t get me started on Manfred… I love this little guy to bits.

I chose to revive Manfred and for Emmrich and Rook to live the rest of his mortality together. In Undying Love

[strawberryfairi]

The TR Boys as Musicians Headcanons

Keisuke Baji

Absolutely does not have the patience to learn (and definitely not master) an instrument. There's just no way. Any time he'd go to practice he'd crash tf out for hitting the wrong note (probably break the poor instrument). And speaking of wrong notes, he's MOST DEFINITELY NOT playing an instrument he'd need to tune himself (EX: Literally any string instrument besides a piano which you can get professionally tuned).

Music theory would be the bane of his existence for sure! Especially getting into the deep theory concepts and mastering tonal harmony. I think he'd be ok like mentally grasping counterpoint but like...the execution....no.

Ear training would also piss him off. Hearing a bunch of rhythms then having to write it down, along with hearing random played melodies like 4-8 bars long and having to write it out just by what you heard alone?! No, he's not on that....

Shuji Hanma

If we're applying the musician stereotype that tall people make great upright bassists/bassists in general ('cause upright basses are so damn tall. They're like 6" tall which can make it a little hard for shorter folk to play so they say), I could see him potentially choosing the bass as his instrument. It would be random as hell but not surprising if Shuji went with the upright as opposed to electric bass since I think he'd just find it as the next appealing thing.

His interest in the bass would absolutely NOT last long, and he just would not have the attention span for mastering it (highly likely would get bored and search for something else more interesting).

On the other hand though, I could see him like late at night when he can't sleep randomly fiddling around with it.

The callouses that come from playing bass (especially upright) would probably annoy the hell out of him. Less from the looks of them and more just 'cause they hurt and are so tempting to pick at (as many bass players tend to say).

Ken "Draken" Ryuguji

Percussion. Drums. Period.

This man is playing the drums. He'd actually be good at it too! I think he'd have fun practicing keeping good timing and especially dynamics (which to be honest omg so many drummers lack...).

He'd definitely get annoyed often with messing up, but I feel like instead of crashing out (like Keisuke), it would just motivate him to keep going.

Definitely does "performances" in his room where he's pretending to be on some big stage doing a sold out show.

I think his most favorite things to practice would be getting into the quintuplets (like so many drummers do, literally they're obsessed lol), odd meter, DEFINITELY polyrhythms, and of course drum fills.

Has that drummer condition where he constantly brags about how absolutely top tier his ride and crash symbols are....

Manjiro "Mikey" Sano

Guitar. Acoustic. Period.

It's not like a deep thing for him, he's just one of those standard acoustic guitar players where they love to play it outside by some water or park or something.

A fiddler with the guitar, doesn't actually know anything technical about it but it's just therapeutic to play.

Usually unknowingly plays lots of "calm" tunes. I can see him naturally falling into a modal kind of sound (Phrygian for a sort of "dark/warm tone" that blends into Dorian which can be fairly "bright" depending on how you go about it).

Likes to sing or hum along to the melodies he plays, especially the ones that he finds himself constantly going back to.

I think he's light-handed with the strings, very soft volume, and likes to do rather slow tempo melodies. You won't find him doing too many fast lines, but he does tend to sometimes do particularly complex (theory wise) melodies and chord progressions.

[plushie-lovey]

FINALLY!! At long last, I've gotten my hands on a Pumpkin Kitty, after a whole year of wanting and waiting.

Her name is Latte! (Short for Miss Pumpkin Spice Latte) You can also call her Miss Spice!

[yo9urt]

applied for a job a while ago and wrote in my spreadsheet "i am not fucking getting this job" not because of the qualifications but because my application was honestly just not that good. today the lady called me and scheduled an interview. Ok