#and it sucks /: cause i really hope she's doing better
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g*lmar rly has to be the best skajrim character on the real like even if you don't like him he just is . literally The best one i think......... on dat note i also imagine that he and ulfr*c despite being fairydust BFFs for lyfe genuinely have the worst communication skills ever seen
#text#but i already talked about how g*lmar is weird about ulfr*c anyways#literally jubilant and feeling special cus he's the only person ulfr*c actually trusts and speaks to outside of formal conversations#he's a very manly man too (like N*loth) for wanting to just control everything... well actually having ulfr*c under 'control' is enough 4 -#- him. unlike n*loth who wants to be above everything that moves. literally not about him tho#i hope that other st*rmcloaks develop a habit of going to hide downstairs in the palace whenever they can tell the vibe between -#- g*lmar and ulfr*c is off because they're gonna be yelling at each other and throwing shit around for 40 minutes in a few seconds#i don't believe they'd fight insanely often but being at an active war probably gets them heated more. Often than usual; and their -#- conflicts are never resolved. i feel like they just don't talk to each other for a good 2 days and act like nothing happened#they're way too manly and prideful to actually let the other one 'win' so they just don't say anything ever post-arguing#Tbhs g*lmar actually really likes that ulfr*c is so unstable and harrowed because it makes himself feel very good and reliable -#- but he has his limits đLMFAOO i bet sometimes he gets really tired of him being so traumatized. very rarely but he does think about it#i'll have to desribe that a bit better later tho... don't know how to word it atm#but maybe he wants to punch him or something BYE. no...... đsavage as hell#he likes it in a very general sense of ulfr*c's personality especially between them but doesn't like it when it causes them to clash#this might just be mostly ulfr*c's doing cus i doubt he's actually talkative about his past issues and Troubles (torture mayhem) and -#- can't communicate anything about it or set boundaries when needed. he just gets mad or very avoidant. No fixing that tho#well it's just shameful to him so he'd rather do nothing than even admit anything to anyone Everrrrr#why does his life suck so bad LMFAOOOOOOOOO#their nasty musty mutualism .. leeching off your traumatized Bff so that he can make you feel good by saying he needs you in particular#while U pay him back with some support.......SOME#Oh well#that zero communication between some sk*rim characters looks yammy as fuck to me. A;lways. ALWAYS#nelvas is power dynamic induced...... g*lmar&&ulfr*c trauma-caused... elituli Umđ t*llius doesn't even know any hobbies she has#bye this is why they're serving so hard
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):
#personal#ugh#not a day goes by where i dont think of her /:#we were such good friends /:#and like admittedly i needed to take space after all that i don't regret it#but i h8 that she prematurely apologized b4 even hearing my frustrations or why i was hurt#bc she apologized for what she THOUGHT i wanted to hear#and it sucks /: cause i really hope she's doing better#i hope shes ok#and i miss her#but i cannot bring myself to message her bc like......#i just don't understand how you hear your friends say something shitty happened with someone ur involved with#and blow up at them and demand proof of it#like i dont care how stressed you are with other stuff .......... who does that??????#nvm the fact that like. majority of the stress she had expressed to me then was literally about...... the ppl who did the fucked shit.......#idk. im just sad#she made me feel so seen and held and heard and we were just friends but like..... i cherished her so much ):#ALSO NVM THE FACT THE DAY BEFORE SHE DID THIS I LITERALLY TOLD HER (after talking to her abt smthn separate) tht#the only way we'd stop being friends is if she did LITERALLY exactly what she did#and yeah she sent it to my Wife's DMs#but honestly that makes it worse cause she knew i was there#nd treated my wife after all that like she was an evil meanie while she apologized to me#(which imo idc it reads and transmisogyny)#and she just like. up and left Everything b4 realizing she fucked up#like she did choose this#and im respecting that and respecting myself enough not to try running and begging her to be friends again#i just. idk man. it sucks
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hheeeuuurrgghppbbtttt
#my dad messaged me today sayinâ he hopes to see me soon and it honestly ruined my day luke#like please leave me alone ://////#then some general normal Every Day BS happened at work and I just had to dip I almost walked off the job no word to my sups#Just makes me think of my mom which#i feel more justified after it I guess âcause sheâs the one who allegedly approves the messages her husband sent me when we had our fight#tbh life is better w/o her messaging me daily like I spent basically all of 2023#wanting to cut her off and she gave me even the lightest reason to do it so i did and itâs been nice#the pointless guilt I felt for not wanting to see my family has turned into general resentment and annoyance#i donât even miss her or him like I straight up just donât want to see my blood relatives theyâre not family to me theyâre just people#i happen to share genes with like if you really wanted to build a relationship with the person#you forced into this stupid world then maybe you shouldnât have been such insufferable assholes for the first 18 years#i spent most of my conversations with them over the phone last year basically just saying life sucks and that i want to kill myself#I need them to feel bad for conceiving me i need them to regret it#my cousin Aaron has the right idea tbh like last I heard he wasnât talking to my uncle or anyone w/ blood relations really#following in his footsteps. I legit just got so full of rage and frustration when my dad messaged me itâs been like 3 weeks since we spoke#it was so obvious that I didnât like my mom growing up everyone knew it and berated me for it like how am i supposed to accept that?#How am I supposed to take the hate and anger she exhibit and put out there in that unhappy home#and turn the hate and anger her and her family felt towards me for not loving her#and turn that into love? How am I supposed to turn unending anger and hatred and bitterness and just be like âyeah i love youâ#I love my parents in the sense that I am familiar w/ them and they have had a constant presence in my life up this point and when I was like#8y/o I had some pretty good times w/ my dad that were DIRECTLY related to my mom being out of the house#my mom was just so abusive to that man for 20+ years#and he took the love I had for him and made me hate him by just shoving jesus down my throat#We used to have CONVERSATIONS he & I but then he got his head stuck so far up his ass that he couldnât see#how he was just ruining everything. Me: Hey so this thing thats goin on?#him: haha yeah that thing thats been goin on!! You know what tho#[starts pitching JC to me again]#that was all I could get from him from 12-18/19#he killed whatever relationship we had together and now itâs a decade later and I have no interest in talking to him#I donât care to try and rebuild. I donât want to rebuild anything with him I donât want him to want that either
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So there's my grammar teacher who used to be known as the intimidating one but like.. He's always been open to me and my friend about like what he watches and interests and has literally asked to see my writing
Do you know how awkward it is to explain the last thing I wrote was haha flower cough;"#+(@+%
(he liked the concept and deadass said "send it to me that's a command" and now I'm omw to write something entirely new because ain't no way I'm sending MineDai)
LMAO I WAS GONNA SAY YOU'D HAVE TO HOLD A GUN TO MY HEAD TO SEND SLASH FICTION TO MY TEACHER
#snap chats#i could never be that open with a teacher bro id rather get shot#will be epic to see what you end up cooking up for him tho. in pursuit of Not sending slash fiction lmaoooo#i wish i was able to be close with my teachers- closest i got was my art teacher during I Think my 1st or 2nd year of high school#he was SUCH a cool teacher and he'd always work on commissions during class#he was color blind so he had this really cool system on figuring out what the appropriate colors were for a client's piece#i remember one time we were meant to sketch those like. japanese scroll pieces Yk What I Mean#and while he did have preexisting examples for students who didnt know what to do (or didnt care LMAO)#he was just 'you always know what you're doing so you can freehand it' so that was epic :)#i drew a dragon.... cause im predictable...... but he really liked it so :)#man high school sucked but i also remember my english/comics teacher.. she was a really big fan of mine#she was especially passionate about my doing comics and doing art related things.. i get sad thinking about it sometimes#part of why ive always wanted to make a doujin was for her so i could send it to her and be like#'hey teach i still really like art look :)'. like when i say she was SUPER passionate about me It Was Super Passion#honestly she was my first big fan if im tbh- id never gotten support like that and i wish i valued her enthusiasm more#i was just mad depressed and angry in high school i just wanted to be left alone all the time.. but oh well no point in crying about it now#it'd be better if i could start thinking of a teacher-friendly doujin to make and give her... lmao.....#BUT YEAH NOT TO HIJACK YOUR ASK TO RAMBLE i hope you think of something to give your teach LMAOOO#just change the names full a Fifty Shades it's fine. terrible example but we know what i mean is the worst part
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man
#i want to cry to someone everything sucks#normally it's fine that im never happy just living studying but kt gets so hard when im on my period#idk if it's real or if im making it up but i genuinely feel like crying for no reason#if i was at home i would lay down on my couch and eat a lot of unhealthy favorite food and my mom would talk to me about#some soap opera and i would only half listen and it would be okay#but here toh fr i feel like ill start crying in front of my dad if he keeps ignoring me to work or look at his phone#i don't even know what i used to do to make myself happy and god that's scary. i don't want to sink into sadness again#i know i should talk to my friend but why am i so scared. like every night i think ill do it tonight but then i just chicken out and go to#sleep. it's crazy whenever i do talk to her aftera lot of time i feel instantly better and i berate myself for not having done it sooner#but like. aah. im scared it's a lose lose like what if i do talk to her and it doesn't make anything better and then i don't even#have that last sliver of hope left. on the other hand#what if i do talk to her and it makes everything better and then i start relying on her and then she's not there when i need her again?#i hate being dependent on people it's so scary and you can never count on them to be there#i miss being a kid that clean happiness untouched by any other sad emotion and entirely independent#now it's like even if im happy im terrified of losing it and no thing is really enough#i wish i could just. not have emotions for s year. just till exams. i can't focus like this i keep spacing out between#lectures randomly tearing up for no reason#i don't know i don't know#oh it's day 2 of periods hopefully it'll all go away on its own it usually does#i hate this pcod bs so much cause like i get depressed twice once when my period is due but then it doesn't come but im still dep#and once when it actually does come like 10 days later#like bitch tf let me live
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ugh
#work is going terribly#i fucked up really really bad yesterday and now iâm probably going to be asked off one of my cases#not only that but the clientâs mom is being super passive aggressive about it#like not responding to my texts and then randomly saying my coworker is going to cover my shift tomorrow#i understand sheâs upset and she had every right to be#but keeping me in the dark about how she wants to proceed from here aside from cancelling my shifts is shitty on her part#like weâve been working together for a year at this point i figure sheâd care about me a little more than that#like this is literally my livelihood. i need to know whether i need to start interviewing with other clients and applying to other jobs#i texted the person overseeing the case about it so hopefully that can give me some clarity#cause she doesnât have any incentive to be passive aggressive and give me the silent treatment here#oh well. at least this is a lesson not to get emotionally invested in my clients#cause at the end of the day i am here to provide a service and if iâm not doing a good enough job they will kick me to the curb#this really sucks but the silver lining is that i wanted to leave this job anyway & i have a backup plan#and also i can still meet with my other client in the meantime & i liked her better anyway#i just really hope i can get clarity on this situation as soon as possible#cause just having it as this big looming thing indefinitely is so obnoxious#oh well. whatever happens happens & i will be better for it#vent
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Last two shifts I worked, I had the same patients but was precepting (training) different nurses. So two nights in a row, I have a patient with a post-op complication (guts not moving) that the surgeons are taking a conservative approach to (wait and see if the gut starts moving). This treatment plan makes sense for the specifics of this patient, but that means weâre doing a lot of symptom management without directly treating the thing thatâs causing the symptoms. In this case, symptoms are pain and nausea so bad that the patient said if theyâd known this is how theyâd feel after, theyâd have skipped the surgery and just rolled the dice with what that colon polyp would do if left alone.
So weâre throwing meds at this patient, weâre walking them so their bowels can get moving, weâre giving ice chips and gum and cold wash clothes, weâre giving IV fluids (which is SUPER rare in the hospital right now because due to one of the recent hurricanes, we are critically low on IV fluids), weâre doing basically all my tricks short of putting another tube in this guy. And itâs working okay. Like weâre keeping pain and nausea just below âintolerableâ but not by much.
That first night I have that patient, while Iâm talking to the surgeon on the phone, my preceptee is in the room talking to the patient. I donât get any new orders because most usual meds that would help are contraindicated in this particular circumstance. Iâm feeling frustrated about thatâI HATE when I canât get symptoms significantly under controlâwhen my preceptee comes up excitedly and says that the patient says theyâre feeling much better after the therapeutic intervention my preceptor did. The intervention was hanging out in the room for 15 mins and talking with the patient about their hometown in Canada.
(Which, hell yeah. Very proud of that new nurse because she said one of the biggest things she wanted to work on was being less nervous talking to patients.)
Next night, I got the same patient, still miserable, and a new preceptee. Weâve got more meds this time, but still only marginal success with managing symptoms. I tell my preceptee, ânext time youâre in the room, plan on staying and chatting with the patient for like ten minutes.â Next time weâre in the room, we do just thatâwe talk sports, hobbies, plans, past surgeries, how much this surgery sucks, just the three of us shooting the shit for a while before we have to go give pain meds to another patient. (It was a surgical floor. That night was mostly handing out ice packs and oxy.)
Anyway, the patient tells us that this chat has been the best theyâve felt all night. My preceptee comes out of the room, and my preceptee is like âwow that really was our best intervention.â And I get to be like âyes witness the power of chit chat as nursing intervention.â
Reflecting back, Iâm grateful that the patient was so expressive about what we did that was working. I told the patient at one point, in the midst of their most acute misery, that we were going to give them everything we had available, and if that didnât work, I had backup plans in mind. Like you might spend the night miserable, but itâs not because we didnât keep trying stuff. And after I say that, the patient goes, âthat was good, I like that you said that, that comforted me.â Which was very nice and convenient because before weâd gone into the room, Iâd talked to my preceptee about how to make patients feel supported and cared for, even when none of the care we do is working. When we left after that, my preceptee was like âwow, youâre right, that really worked,â and I was like, âI KNOW, thatâs cool right? I mean you always hope it works, but sometimes you just canât tell if it actually does.â
I love really open patients, they are such fantastic teaching opportunities. For example, I had another patient both night who was also very open, specifically about what a bad job the hospital was doing and how everyone should just stay the hell out of their room. Considerably less pleasant feedback, equally valuable, about essentially the exact same situation that the first patient was in. Talking through that patient with my preceptees was also very useful and very easy, because the patient had been so explicit in their feedback.
Itâs always odd training nurses because you donât want bad things to happen to your patients, but you also need to new nurses to see bad things. And sometimes you get a patient assignment that is so good for teaching, itâs like it came from a textbook. Very convenient for me personally as a preceptor. Feels weird to say that about patients who are having absolutely miserable times, that their misery is useful to me, but (as preceptors normally say about stuff like this) if itâs happening, at least itâs happening where we can learn about it. Anyway, great couple of shifts to practice therapeutic communication.
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(posting some old twitter threads here for posterity's sake)
Chrissy and Eddie breakup. She's a lesbian, apparently. Has finally come to terms with it. It's half a decade of Eddie's life in the dust. He... he doesn't exactly handle it well.
But Steve's there for him, offers Eddie a shoulder to cry on.
Theyâre drunk when Eddie says no oneâs ever been in love with him. Not really. So Steve kisses him.
But Eddieâs straight.
He always has been.
He freaks the fuck out. Bolts. Lets the calls go to voicemail. Heâd lost his partner and one of his best friends in the span of a week and itâs not fair and heâs pissed off beyond belief at Steve for doing it.Â
But heâs also confused. And he also canât stop thinking about it.Â
He stews on it for weeks. Avoids mutual friends like the plague. The band lets people know heâs alive, apparently. Between losing Chrissy and Steve, he feels like there are chunks of him missing. So he gets drunk. Hooks up with blondes who kiss him all wrong.Â
Heâs five whiskeys deep and when he finds himself banging at Steveâs door. Steve answers with his hair mussed and his voice sleep-rough. And Eddie tells him heâs really fucking pissed at him. And Steve apologizes again. And it should be enough but itâs just fucking not.Â
So Steve apologizes again and again and again, all blubbery and guilt-ridden. It's only making Eddie more angry. And he doesnât know why. And heâs too drunk for this shit.
So he shoves Steve against the door and kisses him stupid.Â
He wakes up in his own bed the next morning and he's sure he dreamt it. (Heâs been dreaming it a lot lately.) But his lips are all stubble-scrapped and his mouth is cotton but he remembers how his friend's tongue tasted and he just.. Wants to cry.
Cause heâs not gay. Heâs not. Other people are. Most of his friends are. And heâs fine with that! Heâs been a good ally.
Well, maybe not to Chrissy. But only cause it broke his goddamn heart. Only cause he loved her so much. Only cause he'd never felt that way about anyone before or anyone since.
Except wellâ Fuck. Shit fucking fuck.
So he calls her. Heâs kind of hoping itâll ring through but she picks up straight away, lets out a soft little hey. And it breaks his heart all over again to hear her voice. But he takes a breath and says, âI kissed Steve.â
And she pauses. âYou kissed Steve?"
And then he says, âWell, he kissed me first. But yeah. I got drunk. Jeez Chris, I got wasted. And then Iâ yeah, I kissed him.â
And she's quiet for a long time, just soft breathing and static. Then she says, âThank you for telling me, Eddie.â
And oh. Thatâs what it was, wasnât it?
So they talk about it. All of it. And he really listens to her this time. He couldnât the last time, couldnât hear over the sound of his heart fuckinâ shattering. Then heâs the one blubbering apologies cause his girl was going through all this shit totally alone and he is now way too familiar with how bad it sucks.
And then they talk about It. The big It. All the stuff her mama drilled into her brain since she was in diapers. All the names that got spat at him between hall shoves. Shit they couldnât be 'cause then theyâd be wrong, shit they couldnât be 'cause then theyâd be right.Â
And when theyâre done and the conversation turns into Howâs the band? and Is Marcel still driving you crazy? Eddie feels ten pounds lighter, almost whole again. Like he was but better, all glued together in gold. Well, almost altogether.
He really needs to talk to Steve.Â
He knocks on his door again that night. This time not at 1 AM, this time sober and remarkably dehydrated.
And Steve answers. This time put together, this time hair done and voice in its day pitch (Eddie kinda misses the sleep rasp). And he looks.. fuck. He looks perfect, doesnât he?
Eddieâs spent all day mulling this conversation over. But standing here now heâs coming up blank. He mutters, âI- I was an asshole.â
Steve opens his mouth but Eddie just trucks on.
ââyou were an asshole too, man. But me, uh, probably more?âÂ
And he ignores the way his stupid traitor eyes start to water, always do when the moment feels too big. ââSorry about that. Sorry that I freaked, sorry that I was pissed at you for the shit I was just pissed at myself for. Sorry for, uh. Yelling at you. Sorry, um. Yeah. Sorry for kissing you. That definitely wasnât cool. Itâs been uh... a confusing month. Shit. Iâm so sorry Steve.â
Steve just leans against the door. Normally he wore everything on his face. Couldn't win Texas Hold 'Em to save his life. Not now though. Now it feels like Steve could have a sleeve full of aces and Eddie wouldnât know a thing.
But then he says âEddieâ so quiet it sounds like he hadn't even meant to. Like it just slipped onto his tongue.
Eddie canât do anything but blink, âYeah?â
âLet me um-â Steve swallows, âLet me get this straight. Whereâd you land?â
God, this shit was humiliating, âNot that. Straight. Not straight.â
âOk. Cool.â
âYup.â
âAnd meââ Steve scratches at the back of his neck, âwhere did you land on me?â
Eddie feels like heâs gonna explode. But he canât bolt. Not again. Even though every bone in his body wants to. So he plants his feet, coughs, âWell, I pretty much assaulted you, didnât I?â
Steve rolls his eyes, snarks a laugh. âSure. Yeah. Iâve been totally gone on you since, I dunno, forever. You were straight. You were basically married to your high school sweetheart. All it took was one of those things no longer being true for me to totally nosedive. But sure, you threw yourself at me.â
This was. It was a lot.Â
âSteveââ
Steve waves a hand, stops him. ââNo oneâs ever been in love with you. Not really.â Thatâs what you said, dude. Meanwhile, shit, cards on the table here? Every relationship Iâve had in the last five years has been a pointless attempt to get over you. So yeah, it was weird to hear, Eddie.âÂ
Steve wonât look him in the eye. His neck is craned towards the ceiling.
Eddie whistles through his teeth, âMaybe, uh⌠maybe give me a bit more time?â
âOh.â Steve finally glances up. His poker face is all gone. He looks like a kicked puppy. âYeah, yeah, of course.â
âIâll probably just need a week or two? I mean, fuck man, thatâs a whole other, like Phylum of pornography Iâve been missing out on for the last 25 years. I gotta get myself acquainted before I can, you knowââ He reaches out, rubs at Steveâs bicep with a wink, âGet myself Acquainted.â
Steveâs whole body is shaking. Eddie can feel the relief flitting out of him. âJesus Christ, Munson.â
âThen Iâll take you out, Harrington! Show you the town.â
âDude, will your dick even work at that point?â
âOn the first date?â Eddie gasps, âLord Harrington, how improper!â
Steve just shrugs, âRules are different for guys.â
âWhat? Wait seven years and then hope you land a sexuality crisis?â Then Eddieâs leaning in, closing the space between them. Trying to ignore the pounding in his chest, thinks maybe he's never been so terrified.Â
Steve smiles into the kiss. âYeah, Munson. It's something like that.âÂ
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inner mono-dialogue
the more time i spend being davepeta with you the more i realize almost every single problem in my life was caused by my obsession with being this unfeeling cool dude
but youre cool already
like in the way that actually matters
youre chill and friendly and just nice and thats all there is to it
youre shamelessly yourself even if everybody around you is a jackass and gives you shit for it
youre similar to jade and john in that way
i really envied that about them
but its different actually being at the control panel and feeling where that earnesty comes from
it makes me wanna match your energy and keep that pawsitivity ball rolling even if it ends up being weird or cringe or whatever
fuck man do you know how exhausting it is building yourself social hoops to leap through all the time and when you trip up even once its suddenly the end of the world
what kinda dumbass does that its like dealing with life in hard mode for no reward
fuck that noise
i like your way better
Nepeta's heart burns and shines inside you.
:33 < thank you :))
:33 < but you know
:33 < i dont think doing things your way is unrewarding
:33 < its like
:33 < a shield!
Dave scrunches up with discomfort.
X33 < i dont mean that in an insulting way!
:33 < the fact is that shields are just purractical sometimes
:33 < it doesnt make you cowardly to hide behind one
:33 < in the same way that it isnt cowardly for a predator to hide in the bushes when stalking prey
:33 < its just a way to make sure you dont get hurt!
:33 < purrsonally i found shields too cumbersome
X33 < im a hunter after all!
:33 < and i guess maybe the same goes for my personality
:33 < its not really that im purrticularly brave for being myself
:33 < i just didnt have a say in the matter in the furst place!
:33 < honestly if i had a choice i would have loved to be more like you dave
:33 < you can befriend people almost effortlessly
:33 < and its beclaws youre also just a nice person
Dave recoils in surprise, but Nepeta passionately pushes forward.
:33 < fur real! i f33l it inside you! theres a really strong sense of empathy there
:33 < its just like mine! just smarter, and a bit more analytical
:33 < whenever we encounter someone mew, its like i f33l you lock onto them, and you gather so many insights into their purrsonality without even trying
:33 < and you can use that to bond with others without giving every part of you away
:33 < which unfortunately
:(( < i never really knew how to do
Nepeta sours with unpleasant feelings. Your brows scrunch together with both pain and sympathy.
Nepeta has a big and complex heart. She tried her best to keep it from spilling over, but it always did in the end. And it was embarrassing. It was embarrassing when your friends dismissed your hobbies or focused in on your strange quirks. It was embarrassing when they revealed they knew about your crush on Karkat that you'd worked so hard to hide. And it hurt whenever he would say mean things about you. He and anyone else.
But you always puffed out your chest and sucked it up. You stuck to your guns no matter what. Because it was fun! The things you liked, the people you liked, were fun, and they made you feel good. Why couldn't anyone else see that? And why did it seem like they never gave a single thought to who you were?
You curl in on yourself. Your chest hurts. You suddenly really miss Equius.
And you miss Rose. You miss Jade. You miss John and Karkat and Aradia and Tavros and Terezi and all the others. You miss all the people you can go outside and see whenever you wish, and you miss all the people that you have no hope of ever seeing again. You feel the choral echo of all the times you've ever felt this need for comfort, this thrumming pain searing hot inside you, like hunger wracking your stomach.
You clench your teeth. You remember being on your bed, curled in blankets, not having eaten a proper meal in days. You remember holding your stomach and sneaking to the kitchen, turning your shoulder at every step to look fearfully behind you, only for your fingers to falter hopelessly on the handle of the refrigerator, knowing there was nothing for you inside.
You shake with anger. You know that feeling. The feeling of being chased by something much bigger than you, a hulking silhouette of menacing strength following your scent through the thicket. You'd clutched a beast carcass to your chest, barely breathing as you stalked clumsily through the trees, performance wavering from exhaustion and hunger.
You'd almost died. You'd almost died often. And then after escaping death so many times, it one day claimed you. Casually. Unflinchingly. And the world beat on without you, leaving you stunned by your own insignificance. You'd looked out onto every preceding moment of your life, wondering if there was anything to truly be proud of in the face of your friends accomplishing all these fantastical things. You'd felt lonely before, but after that, you were truly walled off from every single person you knew.
And now, despite everything, you're alive again. Twofold, together with someone.
A warmth coats the ache inside your body. The two parts of you swirl together, feeling and tasting each other, trying to understand themselves.
It feels like a hug.
#davepeta#davepetasprite#davepetasprite^2#davesprite#nepeta leijon#davenep#art#writing#homestuck#i wrote this a few months ago#reread it recently and decided to trim it down and share
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man
#feeling bad again#i wanna live on my own one day but im too broke and mentally ill to do that. ive never even had a job yet. i dropped out wtf am i doing man#i really dont have a future and i cant even talj to anyone about it#my family situation is fucked. too scared to reach out to my aunt whos probably the one person who would listen but wpuldnt understand my#issues. and ive stopped talking to like. everyone. except my girlfriend sometimes but im just bothering her at this point cause shes so smar#smart ans she has such a life ahead of her and im just.#if i was any better i could make the effort but im not and that sucks#isolation was supposed to make me feel better but its not and god i just need to get it over with at this point.#either off myself now or make it to 25 and hope im normal at that point
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Arcane women cheating on their s/o and getting caught. | Vi, Caitlyn, Sevika x Gn!Reader
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(Part 2)
So I'm writing this whilst extremely sick, but the idea just wouldn't leave my mind, so I'm sorry if this sucks... also, you're welcome in advance!<3
Content: TW!Cheating, angst, hurt/no comfort, swearing, some violence? Idk, just chaos, probably ooc, sfw
Reader has no set pronouns.
((Not proofread))
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ăVI
In hindsight, you should have known better than to think that she'd be yours forever. When you were children under Vander's care, she had promised you that she'd be yours for life. It was naive, and deep down, you knew that it wouldn't last. Especially when she was able to leave prison with the help of that Enforcer.
You weren't blind to how close they were when Vi came to visit you weeks after her release, claiming to have an important mission with the blue haired woman she had to finish first. But things fell into place again with her, and you pushed those thoughts aside from the joy of having your girlfriend back... until the denial finally caught up to you months later, when you were asked to go on a mission with her and Caitlyn to catch Jinx once and for all. You refused at first, unwilling to be the cause of more pain in Zaun, yet Vi couldn't see how wrong it was.
She followed the Kirammann near blindly even when she should've known better, and that hurt. You ultimately just joined because she practically made you to and didn't leave you much of a choice. The jealousy was, however, unbearable, yet Vi just called you dramatic in response.
It was no big deal anyway. Her and Caitlyn were just partners in this mission, you know? It's really not that big of a deal. They are just very good friends at best. Can't she have friends, or are you that controlling now? The lies finally came to the surface when you trailed after them secretly whilst Vi asked for a private moment alone. It felt wrong and invasive at first, but what you saw was a lot worse than the guilt. Caitlyn leaned forward to kiss Vi on the lips, and a perhaps foolish part of you hoped that your girlfriend would push her away to tell her off. Yet she didn't do that. Instead, she dropped her gauntlets and melted into the Piltovans embrace fully, as though your relationship didn't matter. And maybe it never did to her.
You let out a shaky sigh, doing your best not to absolutely freak out in the face of absolute doom. Everything suddenly felt so tense and suffocating, your body trembling in horror. You should've listened to your gut feeling months ago. But love blinded you. It really did. You couldn't look away either, your broken heart pounding against your ribcage wildly when it finally dawned on you that you were an idiot this whole time. Everyone must've caught on except for you, and yet you had the hope that she'd never do this to you. Not your Vi. Never your Vi. Prison must've changed her more than you thought.
Unable to breathe and completely devastated, you attempted to step back and flee. You didn't even want to bother and yell at her when she didn't even deserve your time anymore. But alas, fate had different ideas, as you knocked over an empty can that made both women part in surprise. Vi's eyes immideatly met yours, a shocked look on her face as though you were the one that betrayed her. "Oh fuck... wait, I can explain, I, we-" "-Vander would be disappointed in you, Violet." You said, unable to stop the painful words from slipping out of your lips. Her feelings would never be protected by you again anyway. You've wasted years of your life waiting for her and caring for her when she finally got out. You never complained, and you bit your tongue every time she did something that you disliked. But it was all for nothing.
Vi was left speechless at your words that awoke a deep insecurity she had attempted to hide for so long. Imagining Vander's disgusted and disapproving face didn't help. Pushing Caitlyn out of the way, she tried approaching you carefully, afraid to lose you. You were the last thing she had left. "Please babe, it's... that was... Fuck just let me explain." But there was nothing she could say to make you forget what you saw. And you sure as hell weren't going to stay with a cheater. Vander taught you to know your worth, and you wouldn't let him down like that.
So when Vi was close enough, you slapped her right across the face, making her stumble. How could such an innocent gaze do the worst things? You had to get out of here before your hands stained the blood of your own people, too. "Cupcake wait -" "-Our people are dying at her hands, whether you like to see it or not. And I refuse to be a traitor either." Not bothering to hear what else she had to say, you simply left and never looked back.
Forever truly is never promised.
ăCAITLYN
She has grown distant to you ever since her mother's death. Something you understood and supported by allowing her space to grief. You did everything for her to have a comfortable transition into this uncertain future, hoping it would ease the pain ever so slightly. But things aren't that easy. Her rage was brewing and overflowing into an irrational hatred for all Zaunites due to who had killed her. You may have never met Jinx, but even you understood that not everyone down there was like this. They didn't deserve the anger.
Yet Caitlyn couldn't see it your way and refused to, which led to many arguments and eventually a separation for the time being. Your heart was hurting, and you couldn't recognize the woman she had become. But of course, you were the crazy one. The Traitor, who empathized with those "animals", a word you were still in disbelief in to hear from her of all people, considering her late mother's ambitions. Ambitions that she stepped all over after she used her vents for an unforgivable plan that gassed the entire undercity with "the grey". You couldn't believe it. It left you to sit at Cassandra's grave frozen and bewildered for hours on end, guilty about being unable to do anything.
But just as you thought she couldn't get any worse, she had to prove you wrong like always.
On a moonlight night, you made your way through her estate in search of the last of your belongings. You weren't going to stay in Piltover any longer after she became the commander. Not being able to stand what she now was, you took it upon yourself to leave as silently as possible. Perhaps get back at her for hurting you, as selfish as it may have been to you at first. Yet the guilt melted away when you creaked open the door to her room, a room you often secretly shared. You didn't think she was home around this hour, as you hoped she was too busy to be there yet. But alas, there she was, with a familiar red-headed officer of hers. The one you couldn't stand at first sight, as you felt like there was something off about her.
You were right about that, at least. You couldn't make out everything, but their scandly clad figures moving around the bed was enough to paint a picture you wished to forget. Oh, how the rage took ahold of you in that moment! For a split second, you finally understood how she must've felt like. And god did you hate it.
Unwilling to let this ruin the reason you've come here to begin with, you unceremoniously switched the lights back on and casually began to grab your things off the shelves and vanity. Caitlyn jumped up in surprise when she finally could see again and saw you standing there, back facing her. She was speechless, and so was the sly officer below her. Although the smirk was easy to hide behind a covered mouth. "Don't mind me. Just here to get the last of my belongings." You said, voice shockingly steady. Despite the shocking situation, you felt calm and undeterred, finally done with her at last. "W-wait, this isn't what it looks like, love. This means nothing, I-" "Don't worry. I won't tell anyone. No need for it when my skyship is leaving soon." You turned to glance at her and felt a sick satisfaction at her horror striken face. She certainly never expected you to catch her, and you certainly never expected her to sink so low.
Stumbling out of the bed and after you, as you exited the room, she ignored Maddie's hushed pleas to stay. "Come on, wait and allow me to explain, at least! I... Things have been hard lately -" You walked quicker now, not wanting to hear what she had to say. But she just wouldn't let you go. "- And, and you weren't around and I..." "Are you done? I wasn't around because you didn't want me to. Now let me leave at once, or I will scream and alert everyone in this building of what you're doing." Caitlyn stood still at the top of the grand staircase that you practically ran down. Before you slipped through the doors, however, you turned to her one last time, tears finally burning in your eyes so treacherously.
"Your mother died in vain, hoping from the heaven's above that her daughter would be worth the Kirammann name... and yet, all she does is roll in her grave at your actions. Oh, the shame." You hissed out before slamming the doors shut and never looking back.
ăSEVIKA
Sevika was well known for her loyalty to those who deserve it. It was unrelenting and filled with unparalleled devotion, especially to you. Or so you thought.
Looking back on it, you wondered when the first red flags started appearing. Was it when she ditched Vander for Silco? Or when she spent endless nice "gambling" in some downtown bars instead of hanging out with you? Or was it maybe when she would only come back home extremely late into the night... or days later, sometimes.
There was always a new excuse, too.
She had a lot to do. Missions are piling up. Some random drug dealers weren't handing over the money they owed to Silco. Enforcers were causing some trouble. The Firelights were causing some trouble. She got too drunk and had to crash somewhere closer to the bar. Jinx blew something up again, and she had to fix it. Silco had her running all over Zaun collecting debts. Blah, blah, blah... the creativity was never-ending, and you were beginning to get beyond enraged about it.
You weren't stupid after all. It didn't take much to figure out that she was lying most of the time, and it was clear that she didn't care if you knew either. It was all very half-assed, to say the least. And the people that you asked for confirmation would always roll their eyes, knowing just as much as you did that it was bullshit and she was definitely doing something she shouldn't. Like getting drunk to the point she couldn't remember where home is. Metaphorically and literally. But what got you the most is how blatant and in your face it was.
The question as to why she was doing this now after years of being together is one you'll most likely never get an answer to. And you've made peace with that a while ago. Revenge was, however, still very much on the table, and you'd be damned if you didn't get an ounce of it.
With some bribery, Jinx was thankfully very willing to rat out Sevika, going as far as to even happily lead you to her. She wanted to see the world burn and knew that you weren't the type to let people get away with hurting you. And so, she leaned back with the sweets she acquired through you and watched as you casually loomed behind her in some run-down brothel. She apparently really loved frequenting this one, according to the crazed girl, something that made you scoff. She'd trade you in for THIS? Now that's an insult. The brothel workers nervously scooched away from her at the sight of your face. You two being a couple was well known, but you didn't blame the girls for doing their job. A bag is a bag, and you're about to have Sevika's head in one.
Grabbing a nearby bottle of wine, you practically smashed it over her head, knowing that it would do little to hurt her. "What the Fuck?!" She cursed, immideatly standing up to bash someone's face in. Yet after being met with your unimpressed look, she froze. "Hm? What is it? Not having fun anymore? Because I certainly am." The brothel workers quickly fled, leaving you alone. In the distance, you could hear Jinx's cackles. At least someone was actually finding this amusing. "... Ah... Hey, sweetheart... I uh..." "Call me that again, and I'll gouge your eyes out next. Years and years of loyalty to your miserable ass and this is what I get, Sevika? Have I really gotten that boring to you?" You hissed out, trying your best not to burst into tears.
You've been with this woman for so long through absolutely everything imaginable. But it wasn't enough for her. She had changed over the years into someone you hated, and you couldn't believe you were willing to waste so much more time with her. Not anymore, though. Suddenly feeling so suffocated in this stuffy room, you rolled your eyes and threw what was left of the broken bottle right at her speechless form before turning and leaving. "You know what? I don't care anymore. Go and find someone else who will in this hellscape because I promise you that you won't."
Stepping out into the dim lanes of Zaun, you felt more free than ever before as you ducked into the darkness for good. She'll never see you again, and you'll be sure of it, as you listened to her calls for your name getting further and further away.
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#arcane#arcane x genderneutral reader#arcane x y/n#arcane x you#arcane vi#arcane vi x reader#vi#vi x reader#arcane caitlyn x reader#arcane caitlyn#caitlyn x reader#caitlyn#caitlyn kiramman#arcane sevika#arcane sevika x reader#sevika x reader#sevika
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sucker for you
peter maximoff x reader
word count: 1.2k
i can't stop thinking about how peter would react to reader taking his lollipop from him and putting it in her mouth so here's a little drabble about that
a/n: i should be working on this bucky piece that i started like 3 weeks ago but i just needed to get this out of my system first
warnings/tags: language, use of alcohol (everyone is 21+!!), no use of y/n, peter's pov, and some â¨ď¸tensionâ¨ď¸
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Peter didn't know it was possible to get so flustered over a human being.
He's never exactly considered himself to be a ladies man, but around you? He's hopeless. A lost cause. Every time he's near you, it feels like his first very day ever interacting with another person.
From the way that your smile reaches your eyes whenever he makes you laugh with a stupid joke to the way that you always smell sweeter than the candy that he eats too much of, he's been a goner for you since the day he first met you.
And the worst part? You seem to know exactly how to make him blush.
As per usual on Friday nights, yours and Peter's group of friends is hanging out in the woods behind the mansion. You're all lounging around a bonfire that Scott works to keep going strong, talking amongst yourself in pairs.
"You know, I heard Warren telling Scott that he's planning on asking you to the winter gala," Jean snickers to you.
Peter isn't trying to eavesdrop, really. Jean just has zero volume control when she has any amount of alcohol in her system. He'd be able to hear every word she's saying even if you and her weren't sitting right next to him.
"What?" Jean demands when you offer no response other than some giggles and a shake of your head. "You've already turned two people down. You're kinda running low on options at this point.â
He twists the stem of the cherry flavored lollipop that he's sucking on, trying and failing to focus on whatever it is that Kurt's rambling on about. His body is angled away from yours, but he can feel the vibration of your low laughter from where your shoulder rests against his.
Peter had heard that you've been asked to the gala that Charles throws in the name of the X-Men every year. He couldn't lie, he was relieved when he'd found out that you had shot down the suitors - not that he'd ever have the balls to ask you himself. He had no desire to be added to the list of people that you've rejected to a glorified prom.
âSo? I can go alone. Going alone is better than going with anyone who isn't the person that I actually want to go with,â you answer with a shrug of your shoulders.
Peter tenses at your words, his stomach doing a somersault.
âAnd who would that be?â Jean asks in a teasing voice, almost like she already knows the answer.
Before you can respond, Peter quickly shoots to his feet. Kurt comes to a sudden stop in the middle of a sentence, and both you and Jean turn to look up at him from where you still sit on the old, fallen tree that is being used as a bench.
âWhere're you going?â You ask. Peter knows it's probably wishful thinking, but he can't help but think that there's a hint of disappointment in your voice.
âBack to the mansion. I've gotta take a whiz,â he retorts, hoping he sounds casual. Truthfully, he can't stand the thought of having to hear you say some dude's name in response to Jean's question.
âSince when are you above pissing in the woods?â Scott laughs as he piles some more branches onto the bonfire.
Peter shoots him an obscene gesture, about to bolt in the direction of the mansion when he feels your hand wrap around his from beneath him. You begin to get up, and he instinctively helps pull you into a standing position.
âI'll walk back with you,â you tell him as you drop his hand. âI'm going to grab a few more beers.â You smile at him in the orange glow of the fire and he forgets how to speak. He motions as if to say after you and you begin walking in the direction of the mansion.
He's fully aware that he could have the two of you back to the school in a split-second, but despite how nervous he gets around you, he'd never pass up the opportunity to spend a few moments alone with you. Living here, you're both almost always surrounded by other people. If it's not Jean, it's Storm. If it's not Storm, it's Raven or Hank. If it's it's not â
âI just had to get away from that,â you sigh when the two of you are out of earshot from the others. âI love her, but Jean can be kind of relentless,â you add with a small laugh.
âYou can say that again,â he agrees, his voice mumbled from the lollipop stuffed between his teeth and his check. âJust the other day she was saying that I should ask someone.â
âYeah?â You quip, a curious edge to your tone. âAnd are you going to?â
âNah,â Peter shrugs, trying to play it cool. âLike you said, it's better to go alone than to go with someone who isn't the person you really like.â
âSo what's stopping you from asking her? Is she already going with someone else?â
âNo,â he answers, coming to a stop in the middle of the moonlit path the two of you are walking on. âShe's not. But she's already turned down basically everyone in the school, so I don't think I stand much of a chance.â
Sometimes Peter starts a sentence without knowing where itâs going, but right now even he's shocked by his words. He's not quite sure where the bravery came from, but he can't exactly take it back now. You're not stupid - he knows you can read between the lines to deduce who he's talking about.
You come to a halt, turning back to look at him. He offers a small, nervous smirk and resists the urge to dash away before you can reply to his confession.
âThree people isn't basically everyone in the school,â you chuckle with one of those grins that could bring Peter to his knees. You take a few slow steps towards him, stopping when your chest is just inches from his. Your gaze flickers from his eyes and down to his mouth before you reach a hand up to his face and pinch the stem of his lollipop between your thumb and index finger, plucking it from his mouth.
His eyes widen in surprise, all but bulging out of his head when you pop what's left of the red lollipop into your own mouth. You swirl it around in your mouth, your plump lips wrapped around the stick.
âBut for what it's worth, the whole school could ask me and there's only one person who would get a yes out of me.â
You pull the lollipop from between your lips and hold it back up to Peter's mouth, resting it against his bottom lip until he parts them - to speak or to accept the sucker, he's not sure. But he doesn't do anything to stop you when you guide it back inside his mouth, the flavor of the cherry candy and your saliva infiltrating his senses when it meets his tongue.
âJust in case you were wondering,â you shrug, and turn to continue your walk back to the mansion as if you didn't just make his heart combust in his chest.
He speeds after you, deciding that maybe Jean has a point - maybe he should ask someone after all.
â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘
thanks for reading! this was my first time writing for peter, i'd very much appreciate comments/reblogs đ
#peter maximoff#peter maximoff x reader#peter maximoff x you#quicksilver x reader#quicksilver#quicksilver x you#evan peters#peter maximoff oneshot#peter maximoff imagine#quicksilver oneshot#quicksilver imagine#xmen#xmen days of future past#xmen dofp#dofp#days of future past#xmen apocalypse#xmen dark phoenix#dark phoenix
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Her Favorite - Pt 3
Billie Eilish x female reader !
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A/n: this is the last part of this series I hope you all enjoyed it !! This was one of my favs to write <3
Summary: you're the teachers pet. Her. Favorite.
Warnings: smut, tension ? A small tiny argument, fingering, strap, r sucks billies tits, teasing from both parts, slight angst ??? Scissoring - let me know if I missed anything !
Tags - @trulyy-yourzz @eilishslut @brat-at-the-disco @iluvapplesxh @chrissv4mp @n0vabug @dollyvuu
Masterlist - pt 1 , pt 2
You didn't want to believe it, but she had been distant. Why? It was bugging you because all you wanted was her. Just her. And the more the time passes that's all you could think of. Her. Your God damn teacher. You could barely focus with the thought of her recently so when she had started this weird distancing. You were a bit hurt. But, you decide to try your best to ignore it. "Hey Y/n!" You hear Silvi say, approaching you. You turn to face her. "Oh hi!" You say cheerful. "Since we didn't get to hang out that one time I thought I'd invite you to this party I'm going to tomorrow night." You think for a moment.
"You know what yeah, I'd love to." She smiles and goes about her day. This couldn't hurt anyone right? That was unconvincing, you knew it'd bother someone. But then again that someone doesn't really seem to care currently. Why the hell not!
It was a Saturday and you were in her bed, things were quiet like they have been. Until she turns over and wraps her arms around you. "Sorry I haven't been that present. End of the year so it's hectic as a teacher." You look up into her eyes. Oh.. That's why, now you felt bad about going to this party. But why, you deserved to have fun. You just nod, going to kiss her cheek and sit up. "I uh, I'll just get going." Her brows furrow. "You know you can stay another night babe." You bite your lip. "Yeah but I just don't have a change of clothes here." She looks at you. "Those are fine, no?" You sigh. "I'm going somewhere."
Her head tilts with a grin. "What, no invite?" You stand up, causing her face to shift. Her features changing at your body language. "It's uhm, a school party. So it'd be a bit you know." She caught on. "Right, gotcha." Billies fear was infront of her, she didn't want to believe it. She was 9 years older than you ofcourse you needed to be around people your age. But she wondered if that was romantically too. She didn't want that, she just wanted you. "You hate parties though." It was true, you did. Then that jealousy kicks in. "Shes going to be there isn't she." You stay silent for a moment as you put your pants on, leaving her baggy t-shirt on.
You grab your keys,but she's up and out of bed. "Hey." She says when you don't respond, coming over and making you look at her. There was more silence as she finds the right thing to say. She wants to tell you to be careful and to not do this at all. But shes better than that. "Have fun ok?" You nod again, kissing one another before you leave. The kiss lingers on your lips, and you miss it. Did you even want to go to this party?
It was too late you were already there with Silvi, having a few drinks but never too much. You really didn't like parties but, you hadn't ever been to one so why fight something you haven't even tried. Laughing, talking, music. Honestly it was boring and you'd rather be spending it with Billie, in your underwear in the comfort. Eating crap, watching movies. That's all you'd want right now. But something pulled you out of that little day dream, you feel a hand on your thigh. Your senses going off, growing uncomfortable. You turn to see it was Silvi's you look at her as she must've done it subconsciously. Talking to whoever infront of her. But her next move wasn't so subconscious. Her hand slowly glides upwards making you get up from your seat.
Her face turns to you. But before anything else you go to find your way around into a room, not realizing she had followed. "Shit, I'm sorry I didn't even-" You shake your head. "It's fine. I just think I want to go home." Not think. You were certain. "You sure?" Your brows furrow slightly. Feeling uneasy. "Positive." She comes over and sits by you. "We could go soon, you got somewhere to be?" Yes. At our teachers house. "No I just, don't really want to be here." She gets closer. You felt icky. "Please just take me home." Her demeanor changes. "Fine." Your brows furrow again, what the fuck was up with her.
You were close to Billies place. "Just let me out here." She slows down. "This isn't your place." You go to open the door. "I know it's a friend's." She didn't seem to really care. Wow, Billie was right she wasn't any good. "Bye." You say closing the door, watching her zoom off. You felt gross, wanting to get in there and find some sort of comfort. You knock on the door, getting greeted by a slightly sleepy Billie. "Hey, no fun?" You shake your head, noticeably seeming down. You step in. Being greeted by the smell of her place. It was such a beautiful smell. "Something happen?" You give it a moment. "Nah, just wanted to be in comfort tonight." She sensed something was up, but going to let it be for now.
"Ok well, the beds missing you." You smile at her. "I'm missing the bed." She puts a hand over her heart. "You and my bed might as well date, you like it more than me." You giggle, shoving her lightly. She loved making you laugh or even smile. It made her feel powerful that she could make that happen, it made her heart happy to hear and see. You both get into the bed once you get out of that annoying dress. You eventually fall asleep in one another's arms.
Wednesday, Wednesday. Wednesday. Things seemed to be normal again, which you were thankful for. Today was a stripped shirt and tie day. And she looked tasty as ever. You were in a very playful mood so today you went with yet another short skirt. Her eyes land on it instantly. Giving you a look, but you just returned it with an innocent smile. The shirt you were wearing wasn't helping either. Tight. You were honestly thanking the universe that Silvi wasn't there today. You don't need some repeat of a few weeks ago. At the end of the lesson you slowly get your things, everything was so slow, intentionally so. You go over to her desk, her eyes not meeting yours just yet even though everyone's gone.
"Hi!-" "What are you wearing." Her tone was calm, knowing good and well she was far from that. "Well hello to you aswel." Your eyes roll. "And I thought you loveddd my skirts." She stands. "Why are you testing me today hm?" You shrug. "Good thing Silvi wasn't here to drool over it." You cringed slightly, remembering she was right about her. But you soon roll your eyes again. "Whatever I seriously-" But her hand was around your neck, you tense slightly but only for a moment. It was just her, you didn't need to worry. You had actually been doing that alot recently, that whole interaction had frightened you to say the least, you felt weak and out of your own control in that moment that night.
It was frightening without a doubt. "Don't test me babygirl." Her tone was full of warning, you gulp. Clenching your thighs. Her head motion down as you do, letting out a dry chuckle. "Really? You like me doing this?" Your words go. But her hand soon leaves, causing you to whine. You wanted more. She goes back over to her desk. "I'll just finish that up then we can head to mine." You had forgotten it was the end of the day. Score. You think for a moment. "Yes ma'am." She laughs a tad, shaking her head. She thought you were being silly. No, you were dead serious. So when that doesn't work you resort to your next trick. Your eyes scan her desk.
Seeing a pencil laying there, your fingers go to move it off. "Oopsies, my bad." She wasn't really paying attention, she was finishing a few things. But her head turns as shes faced with your ass. Her eyes widen as she spots the second fucked thing you did today. Her eyes look around as if someone would see. Everyone left. Her eyes return as you slowly stand up. She grabs the bottom of your skirt pulling it as much down as she could. "Are you serious?" She then says. Your head turns to her. "Whattt?" Her eyes widen again, brows furrowing tremendously. "You were sitting there. For almost an hour with nothing on!?" You giggle. "Nooo, I just took them off. But you weren't looking sooo." Her temper shines through. "Jesus fucking christ."
She's surely worked up from seeing your bare cunt on display for her. "Office. Go." You bite your lip. And boom, you got what you want. So you thought. She locks the door behind her, coming up behind you and pushing you over her desk. Causing you to bend over. "Might just tease the fuck out of you and leave you here." Your head turns to look back at her. "You wouldn't." - "Oh yeah?" Her finger makes contact with your folds. "Imagine if someone had walked in." She was still mad, making her finger retract. This was going to piss you off sooner or later. She grabs her tie, bringing it over your exposed ass.
"Out in the open like that." It travels around to your neck, she wraps it around tightening ever so slightly. "With this stupid fucking skirt." It tightens more, you gasp. But it then loosens as she grabs your wrists, tying them together. Causing you to fall further into the desk, the coolness hitting your cheek. Her hand makes contact with your hair, pushing just a tad. "Please, I'm sorry." You then plead. She chuckles maniacally. "Bad girls don't get treated nicely." You bite your lip as you think of a response. "Teach me to be good then." You say, your voice soft. It was her turn to bite her lip. "You gunna listen?" You nod. "Answer me." - "Yes, Ms O'Connell." She lets out a breath, finding the way you say it so hot.
Her hands fiddle with the belt around her waist, pulling out your favorite one of her straps. It was the second most large one she owned. And in an instant it's prodding your hole, ready for access. Your back arches, moving around to try get it in. "Don't dig your grave further." She says stilling your hips. "B-" You stop yourself. This was already bad you couldn't make things worse. Little did you know. The tip slides in, not fast enough but you keep your mouth shut. No whines, no protests no nothing. Not until she bottoms out inside you. Your mouth hangs open at the feeling. "This fucking skirt." Her fury was still evident. Very. Evident. Especially when she snaps her hips hard against you.
The stretch made your eyes squeeze shut, your legs almost doing the same but her hands make sure that doesn't happen. Your brain went into a frenzy, biting your lip so hard you draw some blood. Your tongue swipes over it, letting out a small hum. She looks at why you had done that, seeing your blood lip. She looks at it for a split second, then your eyes. The way they roll back as she's giving you backshots on her fucking desk. You were like a drug to her, she found you to be the most precious thing ever. "Gunna cum? Can feel you getting tighter." Her body leans over yours, her hands on the brown wood. Either side of your body. Her thrusts were ungodly. "Mm, yes!" You gasp as it hits your g-spot. "Found it." You moan. Cumming immediately.
She pulls out bringing you up and making you sit on the desk. Kissing your lips, tasting that same thing you tasted moments ago. Slowly pushing you back, feeling the cold desk against you. She was hovering over you, no words being said. She gets up close to you. "Maybe you should get it into your head..." Her voice low. Her hand moves to wrap around your neck her strength pulling you up and off her desk just slightly. Your eyes widen as she does. "You're mine." But you smirk, sealing the whole situation with one last kiss.
Fridays were probably your favorite, not only was it the end of the week, but you got to see your hot girlfriend. As you enter you're blinded by today's outfit. How would you ever focus. The dang glasses. The way her top fit perfectly, the long skirt. You sit down in your spot. Fixated on her cleavage. You needed to stop this was bad. Then you thought for longer. Was this pay back? Was she giving you a taste of your own medicine from the other day? Your heart skips a beat when she makes eye contact with you. Your thighs squeeze. She was so evil.
You were begging for this to be over and soon. You were also begging to suck on her t- "Y/n? You with us?" You gulp quietly, but her eyes watch your throat. She knew. "Oh, yes. Sorry." This was absolute torture. But you let out a relieved sigh when it was finally time. Everyone goes to leave as you go over to her. "Hi!" You say happily. She smirks. "Hi babygirl." That fucking nickname. "You good today?" Oh God the way she was speaking. "Yes." You knew she was asking how you were feeling, not how you would be acting for her. On your knees, obeyi- "Earth to Y/n?" Your head shakes. "Huh?" She smiles. She's got you right where she wants you. "I asked if you were ready to go my love?"
"Mhmm!" You say wanting to get out of there as fast as possible. You needed her. So bad. So when you get to hers your legs rush to her room, her slowly following. You whine at how long she's taking. "Billieee." She laughs. "Yes pumpkin?" You glare at her, getting frustrated. But you were just so needy there was no room for your bratty remarks. "Pleaseeee." You say, from your spot on the bed. She comes over, getting ontop of you. Thankfully there was a slit in the skirt so she could maneuver properly. Her hand moves over your body, moving to your soaked underwear. She hums to herself. Knowing exactly what she's upto. And glad she's succeeding.
Her finger slips past and enters you a little bit. You gasp. "Remember to breathe." ..... "Good girl." Her fingers enter you slowly. But your eyes are glued to her tits. They just looked so incredibly good in that outfit. Your hands move to touch but she grips them. "Uh uh. Since you didn't have a proper punishment the other day you need to learn your mistakes." You huff, is she serious? She can't be. You just wanted to wrap your lips around them and you wanted to do it now. "That's not fair." You mumble. Her brows raise.
"No? Not fair huh? Let's circle back to you wearing that tight, shirt and tiny tiny skirt. I had to focus on teaching, I had to refrain from fucking the living shit out of you because you indeed looked God damn hot in it. I had to wait a whole. Hour. You can't wait that, and a bit more. Can't you?" You swallow. Having no words. "Bu-" "Uh uh. Don't but me, you know good and well." You let out a moany, huff. "Come on now, don't be like that angel. You'll get what you want. You just have to work for it." You wriggle. "Ah! Lesson learned, I won't do it again." She doesn't even let your hand move to touch before she's pinning them down. "What, did I say."
And you caved, you were too far gone with need to care. "Please, Billie I'm sorry I wore such a revealing skirt like that in public, you know I won't do it again. I promise and if I break it you can do such horrible things and I'll have to take it just please. Please let me suck them." You were almost on the verge of tears, but man was she enjoying every bit of this. "You want to suck them huh?" She ponders as you nod manically. "Please, I need to so bad." She still thinks. "No wonder you were so wet." You whimper. Oh that sweet whimper. And within an instant that shirt is loose. Her tits spill out right before your eyes.
Your thighs sqish tightly as your mouth latches so fast. Closing your eyes. She bites her lip, watching you suck. Bite. Do it all. You were too far gone. Incredibly far. The way you swirld your tongue made her grunt. The feeling so good. Her hand makes its way into your hair, stroking it as you do so. "You are a good girl, shit." She breathes. But she nearly goes mental with your next words. "Mmm, mommy." Her eyes look at the headboard processing. She grabs your face, kissing you with such hunger. Your subby state makes it sloppy. Moaning into the kiss. "Say that again." She says against your lips. And as you were about to. Her finger is back in your pulsing cunt. "F-fuck! Mommy." - "Mm, good. Louder."
Her fingers speed up as you go to again. "Mommy!" It was music to her ears. If she wasn't inlove before she sure as hell is now. "Cum for me, go on." Her fingers enter deep. Making your head spin, and eyes roll back. Gushing all over her fingers. Her eyes look down, looking at the white substance. "You, my girl. Are just one sexy thing huh?" Your head rests back out of breath. "You're sexier."
Weeks pass. Things were back to how they were a few months back. Everyime something beautiful happens it gets ruined and by what? It was eating at you. Was it you? What was going on. You wanted to ask but that'd just opened room for her asking what had happened that night. She had asked the day after if you wanted to talk about it but you declined and said it wasn't important. Maybe you should've told her. You didn't want her freaking out or even saying- 'I told you so.' But when she notices your strange behavior over the last few days its making her want to know more.
The other day.
You had just woken up, making some food, when you hadn't heard her come in. You had on her t-shirt and some underwear, humming away to yourself. When a hand touches your thigh, the same thigh that she touched. You jump back, turning to look at her. She was about to apologize for giving you a fright, but then she remembered. She's done that dozens of times before. You always knew it was her and you always put your head on her shoulder. So when none of that happened she gets more confused. "You've been doing that alot recently angel, everything ok?" You're silent for a bit. "Yeah! Just didn't hear you come in." Such a lie. Even if that was true, she knew something had to be up with the way you reacted. "Okay.."
She thrusts into you slowly, it was all sweet. Everything was. The eye contact, the intimacy. Her thrusts soon speed up, wanting to get you to that bliss feeling. Loving how she always could. She was getting closer to. But everything in the room changes. She touches that sane spot on your thigh making you tense up and gasp. She hadn't noticed at first seeing as you gasp all the time. What was it with that thigh. It wasn't even because of Silvi. But for some reason she triggered it. Something happened ages ago and it was slowly coming back to you. Your hand wraps around her wrist.
Causing her attention to be on you, her brows furrow as she sees your discomfort. She would never ever want to hurt you in any way. "Too fast?" You think for a second, you had to lie you couldn't tell her what was truly bothering you. You then nod, her hand moving to your hip. Soothing any further discomfort. "Sorry babe."
She begins the lesson for today, writing on the board. After that one night things were still dry in the air. You honestly hated it, but it was probably all your fault all along. That's what you'd been telling yourself. But it wasn't all you. Billie was in fact distancing. It was the last thing that she wanted but she was falling hard for you. One half of her didn't care about the fact she was falling for someone so amazing. She loved it, and then the other half wondered if you could do better. When your in your early 30s she will be in her 40s. It didn't sound that bad but it was intense to think about. Let alone the fact she's still your teacher. Even if the year was ending for you this year, you wouldn't have to be as secret atleast.
This was her brain constantly, weighing out the pros and cons. But why should she, she knew what she felt was real despite all of that. But she cared too much about you. She just wanted you to be happy and she didn't know if that was with her. But she definitely looked good today. It made you miss how closer you were before the weird change. You hardly went over to hers anymore and it hurt. It really hurt. "Sorry I'm late." It was Silvi, she had been gone for over a month. You had no idea why. But you avert your gaze, feeling uncomfortable. Remembering that night so clearly. "That's alright, take a seat." Billie gives her a kind smile. Continuing to talk about today's lesson. When her eyes land on you, she notices that sane discomfort like the other night. All she wants to do is comfort you. But she had to stay professional.
She can deal with this afterwards. As the class nears the end she spots how you shift in your seat when Silvi walks past. Her brows furrow, now she was determined to figure out what had happened. Did she do something?
The car ride was silent. It was bugging the both of you but none of you say a thing. As the night goes on it proceeds to consist. Until she speaks up, finally. "You've been weird lately, especially that night that you came home strange from that party and you'd refuse to tell me what happened. And even the other night when-"
"Not now Billie please." - "So you admit something happened?" You stay quiet continuing to take your makeup off. "If not now when? Huh? You keep putting it off whenever I ask you if you're ok. I worry about you for fuck sakes." You turn around so fast. "Bull fucking shit. You've been distancing yourself again! I know damn well its not school. So what is it?" Now she's silent. "What, happened. At. That. Party." You turn to face the mirror. "If you won't tell me why you're distant I won't be telling you that." She was seething, you'd never seen her so angry before. But you didn't care you were getting annoyed too.
Then within seconds her hand Flys to your wrist, you jump getting a fright. She stops in her tracks. "She touched you. Didn't she." You Avert her eyes. "No." Hers squint, not believing that for even a second. "Did she?" - "Billie."
"Did she fucking touch you?"
"Yes. But I stopped it God, why are you so worried." Her brows furrow. "Because, you didn't give her consent to do that! That stupid bitch just thought she could do whatever."
"Why are you so worried when I stopped it." - "She could've pressured you." You shake your head. "Do you think I'm stupid or something?" She puts her weight on her left foot. "You know I don't think that." - "Again. Why are you so fucking worried when you're the only one I want touching me." The room fell silent, a slight need creeping in the air. Her face moves, eyes locking into your own. Her feet move, but so do yours. Lips instantly crashing on the others. Everything grew heated. "Only one?" You nod. "Only one." You both say between kisses. "It's only ever been you." Those words fuel everything in her.
Backing you up out of the bathroom and onto the bed her kisses trail down your neck, down to your cleavage. She takes all that you were wearing off, seeing you all. She then takes her clothes off, leaving you in awe about the special moment that was about to happen. Just you and her, closer than ever. When her cunt slots perfectly into yours you both let out a long well needed moan. This was all you ever wanted, it's all she ever wanted. To have you close in this way. She moves against you, her body moving closer to your own as your breasts touch. Her lips meet yours as she kisses you.
It was the sweetest kiss ever. Full of every emotion. As her movements pick up she pulls back loving how this all felt. "I love you." You were taken aback for a second. But that soon goes away. "I love you." You then reply, she was so happy. Your hands go to her face. "I'm inlove with you." Her heart melts, that's all she ever wanted. She just had no idea if you'd feel the same. "Together." She says softly, putting loose strands of your hair away from your face to see you better. You nod as she picks up momentum, feeling that amazing feeling building up. She feels it too, she feels it all. And with one last move of her hips your both gushing against one another.
You grab her face going to kiss her again, both smiling into it. She lays back on the bed, holding you in her arms. "Why I was distancing honestly had nothing to do with you. It was just my fucked up brain scared I'd ruin things and I nearly did." Your hand rests on her shoulder as you're both on your sides. "Bills. You could never ruin things, I think I've loved you for a very long time, but I too, was afraid. I'd never want you to feel like you had to choose me." She shakes her head. "I'd choose you in a million life times, over and over again." Her hands hold your face. This whole moment was just perfect. It was good to clear up things and communicate. Her eyes wander to your thigh. "I hope you know you can tell me anything at all. I'm here for you, always."
You nod as she says that. You trust her, which was hard for you. You thought this whole school would change that and it had. All because of her. You grab her hand moving it to that exact thigh. You let out a small breath as she watches your face, scans it. Her thumb moving over it soothingly. "Did something deeper happen to you?" You look at her. Thinking for a moment. "Nothing you need to worry about."
Except there was something deeper. Massively, that you knew youd have to tell eventually. And you would. Youd tell her everything. She was now your everything.
#billie elish icons#billie ellish lyrics#billie eilish imagine#billie#billie eilish smut#billie eilish#billie eilish fanfiction#billie eilish x reader#billie eilish fandom#billie eilish x reader smut#billie eilish x y/n#billie eilish oneshot#billie eilish x you#billie eilish series#Her Favorite
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Take a Shot
shy!eddie x fem!reader
You work at the bar Eddie frequents all of your flirting always seems to go right over his head until one night, you're honest with him.
cw: hurt/comfort, mention of alcohol
The bar is hazy when Eddie and Robin enter it, a loud country song playing through the speakers. This isnât either of their scene, but itâs right across the street from their apartment and tonight they could use a drink. But the real reason why Eddie wanted to be there is behind the bar, taking orders. Your bright smile shines from where heâs standing and heâs immediately hypnotized by you.Â
He doesnât even like this place or its vibe, but youâre there so heâs going to suck it up. Heâs been coming in every night for almost a month and has yet to make a move on you like he so badly wants to. He doesnât know why youâre so intimidating, but you are. Youâre just so pretty and those low cut tops you wear make his brain short circuit.Â
Heâs actually going to ask you out tonight. Thatâs the whole reason why he brought Robin. He wanted Steve, but heâs sick so this will just have to do, he supposes. Heâs seen you make small talk with Robin on more than one occasion so heâs hoping that this will work in his favor. He had Robin pull some tarot cards before the two of them left just to be sure.Â
âSheâs going to say âyesâ,â Robin tells him while giving his arm a nudge, pulling him out of his daze. He shakes his head and turns to her, not quite believing her hopeful smile. âI hope this makes you feel better coming from me since I play for an entirely different team, but youâre hot, okay?âÂ
âI think thatâs the nicest thing youâve ever said to me.â He wraps his arm around her shoulder and pressed a smacking kiss to her cheek that sheâs immediately disgusted by.
âGood, because that actually made me feel a little sick so I will definitely never be saying that again.â She wipes her cheek on her shoulder before leading Eddie to the bar. They take seats on the stools and as soon as you come over to greet them, he freezes.Â
Heâs never felt this way before and heâs honestly unsure why this is happening. Why he completely shuts down when youâre around. He can usually at least somewhat flirt with a woman, but with you, none of his sentences make sense and he ends up just floundering. Thatâs really the reason why he brought Robin along. He canât even fucking order a drink when he looks into your pretty eyes.Â
âHey handsome,â you wink at him and he still just stares at you, wondering how you always somehow look so beautiful in the weird bar lighting. âJack and Coke?â You ask and all he can do is nod. You then turn to Robin who gives you a knowing look, the two of you able to communicate with just a look.
âAnd a Texas margarita for ya Rob?âÂ
âYes maâam,â she nods.Â
You head to the other side of the bar to make their drinks and Eddie watches as if youâve hypnotized him somehow. Robin looks at you then at him before shaking her head. Heâs a lost cause at this point and she had no fucking clue how heâs going to ask you out when it seems like all of the words in the English language seem to float out of his brain when heâs around you.Â
Sheâs considering ordering a round of shots to give him some liquid courage because he clearly needs it. Sheâs honestly very close to just hiding out in the bathroom so heâll have no choice but talk to you because Robin cannot take one more night of your very obvious flirting going over the manâs head. The whole thing is just painful to watch.Â
âOne Jack and Coke,â you set the drink in front of Eddie. âAnd a Texas margarita.â The other drink is set in front of Robin and you stand there, hoping, waiting for something but Eddieâs not sure what. He just sips on his drink, the most oblivious man in the world.Â
âYâall keeping that tab open?âÂ
The awkward tension is palpable and youâre wondering if you maybe read it wrong and Eddie actually hates you despite what Robin told you. He never talks to you and when he does, itâs one word responses which just seems like he just doesnât want to talk to you.Â
Itâs a shame, really, because you think heâs cute and when you see him interact with Robin or Steve, heâs all jokes and laughs. Part of you wants to just come out and ask him, but youâre not even sure if heâll give you a straight answer. It seems like he wants nothing to do with you and if so, thatâs perfectly fine with you.
âYep,â Robin nods, taking a sip of her drink before hopping off the stool. âWell, Iâm gonna go to the restroom. Yâall feel free to talk amongst yourselves.â She winks at you before heading down the hallway where the bathrooms are located.Â
You almost want to call after her, but sheâs gone before you can, leaving you alone with Eddie who seems very interested in fiddling with the straw wrapper that was left on the bar. Youâre glad that youâre not stupid enough to actually believe her since Robin will stop at nothing to try to set you up with Eddie. This all just a scheme to get the two of you alone, well, as alone as you can be when youâre in a bar where other customers are present.Â
The awkward tension is palpable without Robinâs presence and youâre scrambling trying to find something, anything to say that would interest him. Not that heâll respond because he never does no matter what he says. Just as youâre about to throw in the towel, and check on your other customers, he actually speaks up.Â
âYou donât have to do this anymore,â he says, almost like heâs unimpressed and now youâre worried that you blew it, that all of these weeks of flirting will have all been for nothing.Â
âDo what?â You ask even though thereâs only one thing that he could be talking about. You just want to hear him say it. The verbal confirmation that heâs not interested so you can move on.Â
âThis,â he motions between the two of you, referring to you then him, trying to show that heâs talking about the two of you. âYou donât have to keep flirting with me just to appease Robin.âÂ
Now youâre really confused. You donât know what heâs talking about. You were never flirting with him to appease Robin. Sure, sheâs been trying to set the two of you up, but youâd never flirt with someone else just to make your friend happy. Thatâs just a waste of everyoneâs time.Â
You let out a laugh, one thatâs probably a little too loud and now Eddieâs cheeks have gone pink. Youâre laughing and heâs even more embarrassed than he was before. Heâs getting up to leave but you stop him before he can get too far, reaching across the bar to grab hold of his wrist.Â
His eyes widen at your touch and you quickly let go, worried that youâve crossed a boundary. Before he can leave, though, youâre quick to grab a napkin and a marker, scribbling down your number before handing it to him, watching his eyebrows furrow as he looks down at the thing.
âI like you, okay? Youâre sweet and smart and very easy on the eyes. Look, I know youâre a man of few words, but you should call me sometime. Iâd love to know your thoughts on Lord of the Rings. Iâll be home by one so Iâm expecting a call from you,â you wink then turn on your heel, heading to the other side of the bar to tend to the other customers.Â
Eddie stares at you for a split second then pays his tab before hurrying home so he can thoroughly plan out what heâs going to say when he calls you. Heâs pretty sure that not seeing you will make him significantly less nervous. As soon as he gets to his room, he writes a script for himself so he wonât sound like an idiot.
When you get home that morning, sure enough, thereâs a message on your answering machine, Eddie rambling on about how heâs read all the books and seen the movies more times than he can count. He then goes on to tell you the changes that were made in the movie that he liked and what he didnât. The message has to be at least ten minutes long, but you listen to it three times as you snuggle up in your bed, preparing to give Eddie a call which will definitely only be the first of many.
#stranger things#eddie munson#eddie munson x reader#eddie x y/n#eddie munson x you#eddie munson x fem!reader#eddie munson fluff#shy!eddie
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Hii could u do a smut where reader calls finnick âFinnyâ. Like she moans it out while theyâre yk and it absolutely makes him feral. And heâs all like:
âWhat was that sugar? Say it again.â Etc.
Say it Again
Pairing: Soft dom Finnick x shy fem!reader
Notes: Dom/sub themes, voice kink, praise kink, p in v, slight corruption kink, Finnick Odair is such a munch. Minors DNI
A/N: I havenât had the motivation to write and Iâve still got a few requests in my drafts, Iâm really sorry if theyâre yours. Hope I hadnât lost my touch
ââââââââââââââââââââââââ
Finnick was your first everything- first relationship, first kissâŚ.the first one to break you in- and quite frankly, he intends to be your last too. He loves how he gets to be the only one to teach you all of these things- to be the person who corrupts your innocence, explores different ways to give you pleasure, and work your body better than you can.
Finnick is always sure to praise you during sex to ensure youâre fully comfortable with him. Sex was never really an intimate or enjoyable thing for him before he had met you, so Finnick wants to make sure you are given the experience he never did. More than anything else, Finnick would like to hear your be more vocal during sex.
Although you occasionally make a few noises here and there, letting out small moans and soft whimpers (because letâs be real, itâs impossible to keep quiet when the Finnick Odair is railing you), you often try to conceal your sounds because you feel a bit insecure about your voice. Unbeknownst to you, Finnick would like nothing more than to hear you moan out his name and to tell him how good he makes you feel. If only you know the ego boost it would give him and how his heart would race at a single comment.
This night, Finnick has you laid out on your shared bed, the mattress soft yet supporting underneath you two as he thrusts deeply into you at a steady pace. His warm mouth is latched onto the crook of your neck, sucking and nipping, sure to leave love marks on your skin as one of his hand reaches for your clit to trace lazy circles. The sex, as usual, is phenomenal and your back is arched in pleasure, legs folded as they hang over his sculpted shoulders.
A few soft whimpers fall from your mouth involuntarily at the undeniable pleasure youâre feeling and you bite down on your bottom lips to control your noises like always. Finnick cocks his head, his mouth momentarily detaching from your neck as his lips form that signature smirk which you are so familiar with. Youâre confused as of what Finnick is doing but youâre way too cockdrunk to care. His thick and lengthy cock is pounding into you so well, grazing over your cervix with every thrust and youâre surprised that it isnât bruised by now.
Finnick grabs a pillow from the side of the bed and swiftly places it under the small of your back as he lifts you up and places you back down with ease. Your mouth falls open and you forget about controlling your volume, a loud moan mixed with a gasp leaving your mouth. The pillow has put you in an even better position, raising your hips slightly so that each of Finnickâs thrust is angled to hit that spongey spot inside of you which makes your toes curl in pleasure and back arch further.
âHmm honey, you like that, huh?â Finnick teases after seeing your reaction, and you can only nod as you attempt to babble something incoherently.
âF-fuckâŚFinny, s-so goodâ you mumble, your mind in a state of haze right now.
Hearing your words and the nickname that just fell out of your mouth, Finnickâs eyes immediately light up and an even bigger smirk replaces the former one on his face. Although you donât realise in the moment that Finnick has bitten his lips at your comment, you sure can feel his reaction to it as his thick cock pulsates in arousal, causing your warmth to tighten around him, feeling every vein and curve.
âWhat was that sugar?â Finnick chuckles both smugly and proudly, âsay it again for meâ
âI-IâŚ.â
Only then do you realise what youâve said and your cheeks immediately turn pink, a flustered look appearing on your face which Finnick finds so, so adorable. You struggle to find the right words to say, only blinking shyly as you attempt to cover your face, but Finnick pulls your hands away as he stares down at you with the same smirk.
âDonât be shy honey, your whimpers and moans are music to my earsâŚâŚbesides, your voice turns me on so much, you have no idea.â
Finnick whispers into your ears, and you feel a tingling sensation in your stomach, âbutterfliesâ Finnick calls them. You blink, not knowing that that is what Finnick feels about the sounds you make, and it makes you feel better.
âNow..Iâll ask you again, sugar, what is it you called me, hmm?â
Finnick hums as he cocks his head with a small teasing smile, waiting for an answer.
ââŚFinny. I called you Finny..â
âGood girl.â
God save Finnick Odair from the things he is going to do to you.
âââââââââââââââââââââââââââ
A/N: to whoever had requested this, hope this is what you had wanted <3 Once again, all likes, reblogs, and follows are appreciated, so are comments!
#finnick odair#finnick odair x reader#finnick x reader#finnick odair fluff#finnick odair imagine#finnick odair smut#finnick smut#finnick x y/n#the hunger games#finnick odair blurb#the hunger games smut#thg smut#thg finnick#thg series#finnick imagine#finnick odair fanfic#finnick x you#finnick odair angst#hunger games finnick#sam claflin x reader#finnick odair drabble#finnick fluff#sam claflin imagine#sam claflin smut#sam claflin
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focal point â chapter 5 | l.n
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summary: oh damn, never seen that color blueâŚ
warnings: art student!reader, best friend/college student!oscar, college student!lando, slight enemies to lovers!au, slight grumpy x sunshine, some more filler (IM SORRY ITS FOR THE PLOT!!!!!), fluff (EEKK!!!!), subtle foreshadowing, unedited as fuck, and hints at a strained family relationship (trauma!!)
message from jordan: hi everyone! long time no see, huh? đ
i'm so sorry for being mia and for not updating this series in so long, i decided to take a small break from almost all socials. but don't worry, we're back and better than ever <3 as always, thank you for being so patient with me. i hope this chapter is worth the wait!! see you soon, for real this time :) - p.s i hope you enjoy that taylor swift reference in the summary, cause, iykyk đââď¸
series masterlist | listen to the playlist
âhellloooo earth to oscar!â
it was no use. this was the third time he had unintentionally interrupted your conversation to respond to a text. all while doing so with a giddy smile, one you had never seen light up his face quite like this one did.
you had come over right after class, the two of you agreeing to hang out and catch up. it had been a while since it had just been the two of you hanging out, the inevitable busy schedules really hitting hard during your last semester. you missed your best friend.
missed meaning past tense. because although he was your best friend, right now, you wanted to snap his neck.
"oscar jack piastri!"
"oh- sorry," he mumbled the same apology for the third time this afternoon, "sorry, i was just texting someone. it's nothing, what were we talking about?"
you gave him a blank stare, "were you texting your secret girlfriend?"
you noticed the way his eyes widened a little upon mentioning the word âgirlfriendâ, "okay, one, she's not my girlfriend. and two, no. i was texting max."
and for the four years you've known oscar piastri, you could always tell when he was lying. and this time, he was lying right to your face.
you decided to play along with his game, letting him think he won this time. so you hummed, nodding your head, "okay, fine, if you say so."
"i'm sorry," he apologized again, locking his phone and placing it face down on the kitchen counter, "you have my full attention now, promise. what were you saying?"
"i was telling you about last week."
"right, with lando and the diner thing, right?" he asked and you hummed, taking a piece of popcorn from the bowl in between the two of you, "wait a minute, how'd you go from hating his guts and it being unbearable to be within 5 feet of him to 'oh my god he took me to breakfast'?"
"you know that party lily practically dragged me to?" when he nodded you spoke again, "apparently i really suck at beer pong and he helped me back to the apartment and helped lily take care of me. it was really sweet, actually."
he smiled softly before letting out a quiet snort, "sorry, just never thought i'd hear you say the words 'lando' and 'sweet' in the same sentence."
"i'm serious!" you sighed, pouting ever so slightly.
"no, i know!" he laughed softly, "it's just... you're just now finding out what i've been trying to tell you for the longest time? that he's actually a really good dude?"
you bit down on your lower lip softly, "i didn't really give him a chance, huh?"
"not really, no," he chuckled softly, "but it's okay. he didn't exactly help out his own case either, in all honesty."
you nodded in agreement, the front door to the apartment creaking open. you both turned to see lando kicking off his shoes, placing his keys on the hook by the door.
he smiled at you and oscar, "hey,"
"hey," oscar smiled, answering for you as well as you took in his appearance. messy curls, tight black t-shirt, grey sweatpants, duffel bag on his shoulder and a soft glow on his skin, you could tell he had just gotten back from the gym.
arms. biceps. veins. god, you should probably speak before you embarrass yourself...
it was too late though, he had already seen the way your eyes traveled over his body. he decided to put the mental note in the back of his mind for now, instead checking the watch on his wrist.
"oh shit, i didn't mean to keep you waiting, y/n."
you tapped your phone screen, looking at the time. it was 4:35, just five minutes passed when you said you'd meet up. it really wasn't a big deal. you didn't even know it had gotten that late already.
"no, no, it's fine. didn't even notice, if i'm honest," you smiled and he sent you a smile back. oscar watched the two of you like a tennis match, cheekily grinning at the counter.
"i have some of those papers you had me work on the other day, they're in my room if you wanna..."
"oh- yeah! yeah, sure," you smiled, grabbing your things as oscar silently laughed at the way you acted around his roommate. how you were unintentionally tripping and stumbling over your own feet and your words, how lovestruck you became.
you followed lando to his room, placing your things down and taking a seat on the edge of his bed as he looked through his closet for a change of clothes, "i'm just gonna shower real quick, make yourself at home, though."
you smiled, nodding his way as he closed the door behind him. after all this time, you had never thought you'd see the other side of this door. his room was slightly messy, due to his busy schedule and his active lifestyle. posters of cars and, seemingly, his favorite video games hanging on the walls. the bookshelf that sat in the corner of the room was littered with different textbooks at the bottom and little die cast models of his favorite cars, along with a few formula one cars that you had recognized. the top shelf stood out the most to you, though.
a picture frame of him and who you had assumed to be his family. a family photo taken during christmas, all of them dressed in matching pajamas. a big happy family.
the photo, for whatever reason, brought tears to your eyes. a smile on your face as you sniffled quietly, putting the photo frame back down on it's designated shelf.
the door opened, causing you to turn around as he closed the door behind him, "sorry, i figured you'd prefer if i didn't smell like a guy's locker-room."
you laughed softly, wiping away the small tear that came from your eye, "god, yeah,"
"hey," he said, sitting down on the bed beside you, immediately disregarding the notebook he was grabbing beforehand, "what's wrong? you okay?"
you nodded, waving a hand dismissively, "yeah, yeah, i'm fine. i just- for whatever reason, when i looked at that picture of you and your family it just uhm..."
he patiently waited for you to finish your sentence, "it just brought back some feelings that i wish it hadn't, that's all."
"fuck, i'm so sorry," he said.
"no, no," you shook your head, "you don't have to apologize, if anything i should be the one who's apologizing."
"you don't have to apologize for having emotions."
you smiled softly, feeling another tear fall from the corner of your eye. this time, he gently brought his hand up to your face, his thumb brushing over your cheek as he wiped it away.
the action made you breathless, as if the way he was looking into your eyes hadn't already. a mysterious color you couldn't quite put your finger on. it was a mix between blue, green and grey.
whatever it was, it was gorgeous and captivating at the same time.
you cleared your throat, the two of you moving away from the gap that had slowly been closing. your fingers untwisting themselves from his, you growing flushed at the fact that you had, at some point, interlocked your fingers with his unknowingly.
"sorry," you mumbled softly.
"'m sorry," he said at the same time. you both shared a soft and awkward chuckle before he grabbed his notebook from behind him.
"so, i had a few questions about chapter 15."
"go on," you said, studying his side profile as he explained the areas he was having trouble with. pretty tanned skin littered with freckles and moles, curls that perfectly kissed the skin on the back of his neck and his forehead.
the sentence lily had said to you last week repeating itself into your brain:
â...and itâs not like i donât see the way he looks at you. he definitely is feeling something he doesnât want to show just yet,â
oh, fuck.
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