#and it has a CHART EDITOR! FINALLY!

[dravidious]

Very cool

I made a Friday Night Funkin' mod!

It's got the whole engine so you should be able to just download and play.

[personastrologyhub]

Degree Series :The Hidden Meaning of the Degree of Gemini: (3°, 15°, 27°)

 ᥫ᭡ ᡣ𐭩 SO I've been diving deep into degree theory recently, partly because I wanted to gain a deeper understand as there is so much to unpack. I started with gemini as I have a lot of gemini energy in my chart, and so its mostly as a reference for myself however I wanted to share some of my findings here to help anyone else—whether you're new to astrology or a seasoned like me—who's interested in learning more about how degrees work in astrology. I plan to do a series covering all the signs, but I wanted to start with Gemini since that's where my focus has been lately.

When we think of Gemini, we often focus on communication, dual energy, quick thinking, and curiosity etc—but did you know that certain degrees of Gemini hold much deeper meanings?

3° Gemini: The Writers' Playground and Paths We Travel 📝🛣️

The 3rd degree of Gemini, we all know that it is traditionally connected to communication but did you know its also connected to the act of writing itself, so like things like —pencils, notebooks, stationery, and paper. I've always had a love for stationary, I would be so happy when my friends would buy me stationary for my birthday. This is the degree of the scribe. If you have placements here, you may have an intuitive connection to putting thoughts into words, making this an ideal degree for writers, journalists, and storytellers, journalling might be good for you.

3° Gemini is also tied to movement—not just short trips like we know but, crossroads, streets, and transportation. It governs traffic, bus stops, junctions, dual carriageways and the various means by which we navigate both physical and mental journeys. If you have planets at this degree, they may influence how you move through the world, both literally and figuratively. The mental agility of Gemini is mirrored in the constant flow of traffic and movement.

15° Gemini also governs corridors, balconies, and gates—the spaces in-between. These are transition zones, just like Gemini, which constantly moves between ideas, identities, and experiences.

This degree extends its reach into daily connections too: from chatting with a neighbor to a quick text or phone call, all short, rapid exchanges of ideas are tied to this powerful degree.

15° Gemini: The Intellectuals and In-Between Spaces 

15° Gemini, we all know that it ties to all things communication, or intellectual work. It’s tied to journalists, literature, and education. radio anchor, radio presenter, news editor, magazine editor, teacher, speaker, publisher, social media marketer, all of that jazz.... It's a great degree for announcers—those who are literally the voice of information, whether on radio or TV.

This degree even links to personal documents like passports, driver’s licenses, or IDs—anything that helps you move between spaces, both literal and symbolic.

27° Gemini: Commerce, Communication, and the Power of Connection 

Finally, 27° Gemini reveals a connection to commerce and communication. This degree governs shops, merchants, and the exchange of goods.

—it’s also about the gathering places where exchanges happen. Whether it’s a newsstand, post office, bus stop, or even a bookstore, this degree marks where people meet briefly, exchange ideas or goods, and then move on. It’s where we interact with our environment in fleeting yet meaningful ways.

There’s also a fascinating connection to siblings, twins, and childhood. This degree highlights duality, balance, and the ability to juggle two or more worlds at once—whether it's managing relationships with siblings, or navigating between personal and professional lives.

If you have placements at 3°, 15°, or 27° Gemini, pay attention to how these areas show up in your life. Whether you’re connecting ideas, working in a commercial setting, navigating different environments, or fostering quick, intellectual exchanges, these degrees reveal the dynamic, multifaceted nature of Gemini.

From writing and communication to short trips and business exchanges, these degrees show where the everyday world of ideas, movement, and commerce comes alive.

[rvbrarepairweekdos]

And so RVB RPW Dos.0 comes to a close

As the final posts come in whether late or in different time zones, I will continue to reblog and share your amazing works. But alas, November 2nd has gone, and so too does the first RVB RarePair Week Dos.0. Thank you so much to everyone who participated, reblogged, and shared your love of these amazing ships.

But wait! This isn't the end. I will be tallying up the ship counts and putting them into nice little charts (hopefully) for you viewing pleasure. This should be posted sometime this month!

Also, if there is a want for it, I would gladly host more fan events on this blog! I know there was talk of gift exchanges and prompt challenges that I think could be super fun! Please keep dming and asking, and I just know we can come up with something for everyone!

Again, thank you, thank you, thank you for making this first installment of rvb rpw dos.0 an amazing experience. This fandom means the world to me and events like these make it feel like home. Please keep participating in fan events and supporting the fan artists, writers, theorists, editors, and all other creators! It just wouldn't be the same without you all!

♥️💙♥️💙

[bengiyo]

The Sign Ep 12 (Finale) Stray Thoughts

It's been too long, so I barely remember where we are. We left at Tharn somehow maybe saving Phaya and getting stuck in a cave to maybe say goodbye because Chalothorn threatened him or whatever. Chart got caught for being undercover. The rest of the gang was lost in the woods. Anyway, let's finish this.

Wait, how are they successfully tracking anyone? I thought there was no phone service.

Oh lord don't start death flagging with promises about rings.

Damn, I feel bad for Chart. That final kick delivery was actually pretty good.

Bestie said they didn't need rope to get them out of the hole. The power of the Warrior's Bond and Yai's arms was enough.

I watch too much American action. The bullet stuff is giving recent Fast films.

Well, there goes Khem.

Why would they let Tharn run after them alone? He literally loses every fight.

Mhmm, see, Chalothorn had to intervene.

Montree still being afraid of Tharn came across clearly.

Damn, y'all ain't even shower before going back home?

Here we go. One last look at Babe's waistline before it ends.

Oof, the only thing Tharn responded to was an admission of his love.

Finally, 🍑

Oh, I liked that shot of the water leaking through the bed to show that Tharn was gone.

I feel like the grandma has always known more than she let on.

Did we really repeat the exact same death scenario? Chalothorn, you really suck at this. The circle remains unbroken.

I know Phaya's doctors have got to be frustrated that he keeps drowning.

Is Dao in France to cut down on filming schedule conflicts?

I love when dramas show the passage of time with facial hair.

So... Chalothorn just...got over it off screen?

Oh, a second season tag and Saint cameo. I guess?

Final Verdict: 5.5, Great Gowns, Beautiful Gowns. Overall, I just don't think the elements of this show ever really came together. I think the first two episodes of training and mythology teasers, along with the Lieutenant Tam mystery, made me expect these elements to circle and eventually converge in a more cohesive way. I also feel like some of the side stuff didn't really work. I thought some of the mythology about the Naga and Garuda was really interesting, but I didn't exactly feel the cycle they were stuck in playing out in this drama. I'm also hugely annoyed about the core angst evaporating off screen. So, in the end, I'll mostly remember it as copaganda.

That being said, I thought the cast chemistry was solid, and I really liked the execution and use of the CGI. I like that IdolFactory keeps trying more things, but I do think we need to get stronger script writers and editors in the room with a stronger say on the planning front.

[celestialspiritbabe]

Fairy Tail 100 Years Quest episode 6: thoughts + opinions

Troubled Lucy

to be completely honest, I've actually never heard of this omake before, but nonetheless, I'm happy it got animated!

ah yes, classic Natsu and Happy making themselves at home at Lucy's apartment (I'm not saying it won't be their home in the future, but iykyk🤞🏻🤞🏻)

I love how Natsu is being supportive in his own special way lmao

L: ''I'm already on a one week extension and I can't ask my editor for more time!'' N: ''Editor? Want me to blast 'em and get you a longer extension?'' L: ''DON'T YOU DARE!''

Lucy my beloved // SHE'S JUST SO PRETTY!

aww, Natsu and his job offer is probably the biggest reason for Lucy getting a sudden surge of inspiration and potentially overcoming her writer's block🫶🏻

WHY ARE THEY ALL BEING SO SHOCKED OVER THE FACT THAT A FREAKING DRAGON GOD IS CAPABLE OF WIELDING SUCH STRONG POWERS?

I'll say it once again: Lucy looks soooo freaking beautiful in her Sagittarius Star Dress

LUCY CALLING OUT FOR NATSU!😭😭😭

MY BOY (OR DRAGON?) IGNIA FINALLY MAKING AN APPEARANCE!

the animation excellence in this episode has been off the charts so far!!

okay, but why does Ignia low-key look hot??

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, I CANNOT FIND ANY INFORMATION ABOUT WHO VOICES IGNIA IN THE ENGLISH DUB??? (I was hoping it would be Clifford Chapin, but this honestly sounds more like Zeno Robinson aka Hawks from MHA)

LOOK AT THEM! ❤️‍🔥

L: ''Oh yeah, if you eat these flames you can power up!'' N: ''NO WAY I'M SCARFING DOWN THAT NASTY GUY'S FIRE!''

(welp, little did they know about the chaos that would ensue not that long after)

''I'M ALL FIRED UP NOW!'' // TODD HABERKORN, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN AND THEY/THEMS, TODD HABERKORN! 💕

''Those flames can boil the sea and can probably evaporate the sky, scorch the earth. For the very first time ever, I felt afraid of Natsu's fire.'' // LOOK AT LUCY BEING ALL WORRIED AND SCARED FOR THE LOVE OF HER LIFE. 😭😭😭

SCREAMING, CRYING, THROWING UP! ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

L: ''Come on Natsu, it's okay. It's over now, and I'm right here with you.''

THIS IS DEFINITELY MY FAVORITE EPISODE SO FAR!

ONE OF MY FAVORITE MOMENTS FROM THE MANGA FINALLY GOT ANIMATED + AMAZING VOICEWORK FROM TODD AND CHERAMI TO WRAP EVERYTHING UP! FELLOW NALU SHIPPERS, WE'VE BEEN WELL FED. ❤️‍🔥

[giveafike]

TUMBLR WRAPPED 2024!

hi!

did i scare you? unexpected post, huh? I wanted to have something fun to wrap up the year before we move on so I thought, why not a "wrapped"?

Keeping it short & sweet with some insights too + i luv statistics and seeing patterns, so this is always super interesting to me. Without further ado, here's our wrapped together!

Stats Recap (nerd stuff):

As of 10/12/2024, I have 106 posts. 21 of those are actual fics, meaning almost 1/5th of my posts are works.

The rest is yapping - need to stfu got it! noted!

I received 1,901 notes and 149 followers.

You people are INSANE!!! I have a more emotional post due for New Year's but truly, that is wild, wild work. I'll save the tears and heartfelt stuff for that one, but I want you to know how eternally grateful I am for all of you. Being encouraged by you guys is not just inspiring—it’s addicting, electrifying, and everything in between.

Thank u for the outpouring love.

Inbox Recap (what to look for in 2025?):

Hold ur horses, there's gonna be a lot to write and get through! Thank you for requesting and trusting me to make your ideas come true, I hope to do 'em justice.

Here's a little "reading" so to speak (I HAVEN'T WRITTEN ANYTHING SO DON'T START @ ING ME):

Dominic Fike/Elliot:

sensing an alarming amount of unrest and horn*ness over here. Sensing two posts, both for elliot....smth smth... NSFW... something to do with Nate as well, joining....? Nate and NSFW has the same about of letters too, not a coincidence!!! Also sensing a blurb with a massively underrated song. u btches ab to pmo, why don't we listen to Açaí Bowl more as a collective get the streams up omfg- sorry got sidetracked. that's ab all I can say.

Jude Bellingham:

Pretending to be shocked when I say: more smut requests? Oh brother. But one's very sweet and cute and respectful awww-- SIZE K*NK? oh gosh guys um..the only way I can describe this one is...desperate smut. Anon... cmon now. I would say more, but anon owned up to it saying "This is a long and sick request but I believe you are the only writer on here that can bring this to life 😭😭" which makes me giggle so FINE i'll let it slide, I'll try to do as best as I can (luv u don't u worry I got ideas brewing)

Ben Shelton:

phew. lot of nsfw. like a lot. like a crazy amount. Talking ab that damn car (I'm gonna do smth DRASTIC to that fkin car if he posts w it one more time) talking ab being a munch, ab a supermodel, talking ab scratches, talking ab laver cup (THROWBACK!), about ben showing off.... it's getting hot under the collar, oh gosh. Ahem. We have some sweet fluff ones too! including reader getting insecure/jelly. Ben being irrational, one about....homesickness? a LOT of pregnancy asks. like A LOT. SHELTON NATION DON'T GET KNOCKED UP. PLEASE. One I'm very excited to write, Ben x a certain Doja song...heheheheehehe oh and also, Ben and a 'knock-on effect' w his precious little car, ykwim? no? you'll find out. shush. A very exciting story ahead, the first one with NSFW incorporated - thank u 'D' for the prompt!! Also, I finally got my hands on them tiktok editors and I've made a promise or two to do something w their works.....catch my drift? you'll see soon. Special little hints as to who: victim no 1 and victim no 2 🙂‍↕️😝😙🥰

Post Recap (what went on the billboard charts for u?):

IN 6TH PLACE:

At 85 notes each, we have a tie between "Yours" and "Come Here". Both Ben posts, one SFW the other NSFW. Writing "Yours" was super fun, writing jealous/possessive and sassy Ben kills me laughing, IJBOL and writing Carlitos too? SO funny (wonder how that'd go down differently since we saw them being bff besties at Garden Cup) - Possessive Ben is a guilty pleasure, hehehe. Writing "Come Here" was really interesting since it was my first NSFW of Ben. Also based off of my fave Dom Fike song that's just as h*rny. Thigh riding being my FIRST one off the dome is lwky crazy lmao. Sometimes, I wish I could write more in my NSFW posts, i feel a bit insecure in my NSFW writing? I believe in quality>quantity in fics always, but I hate how short mine are for NSFW posts...sigh. Maybe I should build up the tension more? Go deeper (no pun intended)? you let me know, that would be incredibly insightful!!

IN 5TH PLACE:

At 93 notes, we have my baby, "Shattered"!!! "Shattered" ended up becoming a mini-passion project for me (clearly). What was meant to be a mid-sized blurb ended up progressing to 10k words - how that happened is beyond me. Everytime I thought I was done and ready to close up and conclude, there'd be another part, another bit that I'd want to add. It even got to a point where I'd be on my bus home from work or college, almost falling asleep when I'd get woken up with more inspo, lol. It was my first time writing angst in a very, very, very long time but looking back now, I really truly enjoyed it and I'm quite proud of it! Maybe more angst reqs in my future? I’m leaning towards YES

IN 4TH PLACE:

At 102 notes, we have the "NSFW Alphabet with Ben" - you people are so horny omg. This was the first EVER NSFW thing written about Ben from me. And honestly? my least fave hahahahaa. I deadass have this blocked out of my memory, like I haven't gone back to read it after I posted it. I feel like I'd read it and cringe, or disagree w it or be like "erm acshully ....that's not canon" it prob needs to be redo - I'd never hate any of my children but I'm just saying if this one went missing, idgaf. If you want a crazy NSFW reading thats prob more accurate than anything, check this reading out. Feral, bye.

IJBOL what in the equality is my top 3 posts- I MEAN, here's the top 3 that you people ate tf up!

IN 3RD PLACE:

At 142 notes, we have the "When it Rains, it Pours" - smut always wins here huh? My 2nd fic post! This is a whole nasty NSFW post w Elliot from Euphoria (aka Dominic Fike) mixed with friends w benefits, rain noises, a homemade fort and w**d! Amazing trio imo. Literally as I'm writing this, I just got another like for that freaky ass blurb. As much as I'm excited to write more Dom/Elliot stuff, ALL OF YOU PEOPLE ARE SOOO HORNY? LIKE EVERY SINGLE INBOX REQ IS SMUT? EVERY. SINGLE. ONE. Idk how many times I can reinvent the wheel, so to speak, but I'll sure as hell try....hehehe

IN 2ND PLACE:

At 143 notes, we have "Game, Set, Match" part 1 - Ben Shelton. AWWWW MY BABY, MY LOVECHILD! This was the first ever STORY and I'm so glad it became a 3 part story too. Triple Platinum, I know that's right!!! I really loved making this, I didn’t plan to add the Instagram element, especially since I’m usually terrible at fake IG fic stuff (finding the right images is so limiting). But for GSM, it just felt right. I think my writing has improved a lot since then, too. I always laugh at my Ben posts because my A.Ns are always like "oh brother a LONG ONE HERE" and then my next post is even longer 😭 Thank u fr for the love on this one, because THAT'S when I really got a whole lottaaa support and love and it rly blew me out of the water, I could cry.

And finally....IN 1ST PLACE:

At 147 notes, it's no surprise that we have the "Waves", a Jude Bellingham blurb.

No surprises here, it was meant to be. I say that because I had this ask sitting in my inbox and decided to do a poll asking what I should post first - after tagging all the tags, I should've known it'd be crazily ratio'd by the Jude community on here, hahahhaha. I think it was something like 80% for Jude and the rest scattered throughout? This was my first ever Jude blurb, and I think it'll be one of many. I have a couple in my inbox but the future is there for me and writing about that silly guy.

Final words:

Was that as interesting for you as it was for me? I've been meaning to talk and reflect to u all inbetween the whole "Advent Calendar" series.

If anything, these stats tell me more about you guys, what you want to see and how I should continue going forward. I always want to write about things that matter the most and stick with you, fics that have you coming back to reread and enjoy.

Having representation in my characters and creating a world where you can sink into time and again is one of the best and only things I can give, so you bet by all means neccessary I don't want to half-ass it.

I might not know where your headspace is at, or what's going on in your life but I hope whatever happens, I can have a little space right here, make you laugh, smile and feel things that take your mind off of reality. At least until you finish reading.

As for the rest of the year, I still have my finals and work this weekend and as the season comes closer, I'd like to spend it with my loved ones while I still can :) The "Advent Calendar" will continue as per scheduled!

I hope to write some more before NYE comes round but we'll see. It's never a burden to write, it's always a destresser, but you bet I'll be enjoying company with family and friends too. That's all I've got for 2024, I can't wait to continue creating silly little imaginary situations in 2025 <3

- lots of love,

azzie.

[uglypastels]

Corroded Coffin, The Game of Lost Souls (1993)

Love them or hate them, there is no escaping Corroded Coffin. With chart toppers that occupy each radio in the country and controversies following them left and right, good luck finding someone who is not talking about the band these days. But what do the rockers have to say for themselves? To find out, our editors sat down for a conversation with Jeff, Eddie, Gareth and Dougie, spanning all topics from their upcoming new album, The Game of Lost Souls (available in your local record stores this month), to hopes for the future as well as a look back on their previous hits and falls + much much more!

I'm glad everyone could finally join us here, and I'm sure this question has been on your minds since then, so why not get it out of the way? What exactly happened at the AMAs?

J.P. - Boooo [laughs]. C'mon, next question.

The people demand answers, boys. It is, after all, not often that a broadcast gets shut down like it did that day.

E.M. - People demand entertainment. They want scandal and drama. They jump to conclusions and get angry about it, but the second they know and it turns out not to follow the narrative they dreamt up, they'll be just as angry.

But you can't say the same about the hotel room incident last month that was all over the glossy pages; it was all just a dreamt-up narrative by the tabloids, can you?

E.M. - Oh, no. That was completely my fault. But no worries, I paid for the damage.

I'm sure our readers will be happy about that. Then, let's move on to something you can talk about: the new album. How was it getting back in the studio for a third time? Were you nervous?

D.T. - You can say that. After Cryptic we doubted we'd ever set a foot back in there.

Because it wasn't as successful as you had hoped?

D.T. - Yeah, sure. [...] It was tough to get back to the right mindset. It's what helped make our first album what it is, but chasing that sort of high only sets you further back, and it took us a while to realise that.

So, what's different now? Why do you think it will work this time.

E.M. - We don't! As an artist, making something and putting it out there in the world is the biggest gamble you can make. All we can do is hope for the best and that it won't blow up in our --- faces.

But are you happy with the result you're bringing out? Proud?

J.P. - Abso----lutely. We've learned from our mistakes, taken all the feedback we could get without wanting to shoot our bloody brains out, and made the music we wanted to make.

G.R. - Yeah, we're back on our regular bullshit, baby, and I think the fans will see that too.

Any tracks you're most excited for people to listen to? And why?

G.R. - I think the people who sent me all those letters- if you know you know- last year will really enjoy "Scream for Initiative", especially the bridge.

D.T. - "Decade" and "The High Cliff" are great. They might be something new for us, but I think the fans will enjoy them.

E.M. - I would suggest everyone to put "Kneel and Pray" on their next sex mixtape, at least if you're into that kind of freaky shit. And yead, can't wait for everyone to hear "The High Cliff." I think we pulled off something great with that one.

J.P. - For me, it would have to be the title track, man. It just pulls everything together on the album. I got to go all out on the solo, which is always great fun. I definitely can't wait to play that one on tour.

Speaking of a tour, there had been speculation that there might not be one, but that is not true?

G.R -. I would like to think that there would be a tour no matter what we do because performing our music is why we do it and put up with everything else. But at the end of the day, there is much more to it than just us, and sometimes it doesn't go as planned, but the will is definitely there.

E.M. - I beg people to stop reading all this shit- except Black Market, of course - you're not gonna get anything good out of it. if you want fantasy, go read The Hobbit.

J.P. - It is pretty exhausting to walk past a newsstand and see that every cover and headline is another made-up story about you.

I'm sure it is, what's the weirdest one you saw come up?

J.P. - They're not all that bad. I like the ones where it turns out I'm secretly dating supermodels and actresses. It's nice to know that the public at least thinks I have some game.

D.T. - That's because the person who makes up those rumours has never met you. If they had, they'd come to their senses.

G.R. - I liked the one that suggested that Eddie made out with a dog.

E.M. - Yeah, I think they mistook your mom for it.

Let's keep it nice, boys.

E.M. - Sorry, sorry. [laughs]

[rest of the interview not found]

- the Corroded Coffin Archive (Source: Black Market Magazine)

[ravenstargames]

✦ Lost in Limbo Devlog #5 | 08.31.23

August is OVER and that means a brand-new Lost in Devlog!!! 💜 We are very excited for September to begin because that will definitely mark a new era of Lost in Limbo's production as the whole team will be finally free of the shackles of the spanish education system!

This devlog contains mainly progress in the programming and writing department (yours truly in charge), but we have also made some progress in the art department.

In addition, we will use this devlog to discuss a few changes and decisions we have taken in regards to the course of the demo—so feel free to grab a drink and join us for the ride!

First and foremost...A glimpse of our main menu! 🎉💜 I have been working hard this month to implement the UI as we finally got the files, and I've also animated and programmed the main menu screen, the configuration screen, save/load, etc. The dialogue box and everything else is also implemented and working perfectly, and of course we have a custom cursor thanks to miss Raquel! 🎉

Needless to say, LiL is my first coding adventure, so I'm sure our code isn't perfect or in optimal condition, but hopefully our Kickstarter will allow us to hire a programmer to fix that. I think I've done a pretty good job considering my lack of experience!

Also, special thanks (again) to our dearly beloved @crescencestudio for bearing with me and graciously lending a hand when I struggled the most. They are officially my ren'py mentor and I'd like to take a moment to illustrate our my struggle to y'all with a simple screenshot:

(Also it's kind of funny we both have animal crossing pics in our discord accounts, that was ✨ a coincidence ✨)

<<Inside the holy judgement chamber of the Silver Spire, may your words carry only truth, lest punishment is what you seek.>>

This month our dear Raquel has been working on backgrounds when she's had a moment, and this is one of the pieces she has been rendering and polishing! We'll also take a look at another background (a really important one) to bring it up to our new standards. As I said in another devlog, the master degree we were (and still are, until the 15th) attending has changed our way of seeing and approaching art pieces, so we are looking into improving pieces that are still in the making!

First of all; we are super proud and happy to welcome a new member to the team of Ravenstar Games: Allie! They'll be our editor and proofreader, and I'm sure you know and love some projects she's been on, like Blooming Panic! or our recent and beloved Intertwine. They are a fantastic fantastic writer, an incredible person and a passionate dev that I've had the pleasure to know and work with for a while now, and I would trust no one else with the script of our baby! (and if you are a writer, you know how hard it is to let others read your stuff sometimes. It's like baring your soul to them; it could only be Allie for me!) So please give them a big warm welcome!!

For the writing department, some devlogs ago we talked about the script suffering some changes—well, they have officially solidified now!

We have cut some content that was not exactly relevant for the first experience we want y'all to have with the game. A lot of context and exposition that helps, but is not absolutely necessary to enjoy what is perhaps the most important thing for an indie team and their game; the first demo and the impression it leaves behind. That content has not been scraped and we have decided to save it for an extended demo; the first demo will still be as long as it was in the beginning, as a lot of new content has also been added to prioritize the LIs, which is what you are here for.

We also made this decision because we were once more faced with the reality of: there's only four of us and it's not realistic to do seven LIs + six supporting characters + their expression charts + 13 backgrounds + everything else for a first demo. We are learning as we go, for better or worse, and sometimes you have to sit back and say "right. this is not going to work" so we had to do that. Sadly, we were not realistic with what we wanted to do, but hey, we all get too excited and dream too big sometimes!

This changes will ensure you get the best first experience with LiL without losing important, meaningful content, and hopefully be excited for what will come later. In my humble opinion, the demo script is now in much better shape than it was a month ago. Trust. And just wait for Allie to edit it—that's going to bring it to perfection.

Oh! We'll also be modifying the Masterpost soon as some things are a bit outdated and can be improved, so expect to see some new stuff in there!

It's 1 am here right now as I write this. I'm in bed. Today has been a day. Tomorrow I'll take a look at this and correct a million typos. See? Another reason we need Allie with us. There's screenshots to take, videos to make, and everything is slowly coming together. We are in really good spirits, motivated and hopeful for the near future. This has been long enough as it is, so as always, thank you for being part of Lost in Limbo's journey, and for the love and kindness you give us again and again. We hope you all are doing great, staying hydrated, and taking care of yourself 💜 See you very very soon!!

[funkin-news]

funkin blog update: "the funkblog with factorio references..."

the summary below does not include nerd stuff, if you like nerd stuff read the full blog (there is a lot of nerd stuff) (it is straight up called nerd stuff and put in its own box in the blog post)

⬇️

MORE chart editor stuff!! there is now playtesting and it has a lot of customization, from where you start to what you load👍

meet HAZEL, one of the funkin' crew members who hasn't written on the blog before toda... *checks date* ...yesterday!

hazel manages server stuff and has built the API for online leaderboards in fnf!

the way this is gonna work makes it so they don't have to rely on the game to do calculations, which minimizes bugs fumbling your score AND lets them check submissions server-side to see if there's any cheaters!

that's not all hazel's done: they've also made nifty tools and automations and fixes for the devs to improve and speed up the work process in the long run!

see this?

that's a lot of time, right? well now it looks like THIS!

there's now also a funkin' launcher for the testers! (the final game will not ship with a launcher)

hazel's also set up a single-sign on (SSO) service so you don't have a kghjpillion accounts for every different funkin-related thing: just one account for all things funkin!

based on your login, the download page for any development tools will list out all the ones you can access!

there is also the log viewer for devs:

MERCH UPDATE! the pin manufacturer has 400 pins left to send! here's 2000 of the sent ones!

pin shipping is starting with about 500 orders shipped this week and then likely ramping it up to 1000 orders shipped per week!

"These are estimates from our pin shipper... so if they are off we will make sure to kill him..."

[suedesongs]

These Are The Suede Songs 003: The Drowners

1991. The University of London Union Ticket Office. Enter one Simon Gilbert, stage right. Gilbert, a twenty-five year old punk from Stratford-Upon-Avon, has just heard a demo tape from a band, supposedly one managed by, among a couple of other characters, his colleague Ricky Gervais. Gervais was, at this point, working at ULU and moonlighting in a band, as Brett Anderson recalls, called Son Of Bleeper. This was long before he would become better known for his “comedy” - and troubling views on transgender rights.

Gilbert asked Gervais if he could join, to which he was told he couldn’t “because he didn’t have flares and he didn’t have a fringe”.

Thank goodness, he would go on to ask another of Suede’s managers and secured a rehearsal. It would take six months of Gilbert believing he was on a trial period to realise he was officially in the band.

This was monumental in Suede’s musical journey. Gone was the faulty drum machine which would constantly break down, and here was a proper full-time drummer, and the final push to shake off the unpleasant spectre of Baggy forever, and to comfortably slide into something tighter, more violent, sexier. Gilbert’s drumming is melodic and calculated, whilst at the same time booming and tribal. It’s the kind of drumming that fills stadiums, and what a better way to introduce Suede to the world at large than with his iconic drum fill on ‘The Drowners’.

It was around this time, too, that Justine Frischmann would depart the band. Anderson recalls to Dave Thompson that, as Butler was increasingly developing his playing to incorporate both lead and rhythm at the same time, this, sadly, made her feel her place in the band was becoming somewhat redundant. Frischmann herself remarks that it was “better to be Pete Best than Linda McCartney.”

Another reason for her exit was the shift in the band’s musical direction. Frischmann increasingly felt that songs were becoming too long and overwrought. Though she would, fantastically, go on to create short, spiky post-punk with Elastica later in the decade.

On January 2nd 1992, Suede attracted the attention of Saul Galpern, the operator of Nude Records, whilst playing at The Venue in New Cross in a show under the name “On For ‘92”. He offered them £3,132 for a two single deal.

In April of that year, Melody Maker made the bold choice to place Suede on their front cover, proclaiming them the “Best New Band in Britain”. This cover has gone on to gain an almost infamy amongst Suede and their fans. Anderson, in the 2022 BBC Documentary Rock Family Trees: The Birth of Cool Britannia, refers to it in disparaging terms, likening it to winning a competition in school as a child.

However less discussed is the contents of the article itself. Not only were Suede described as ‘The Best New Band in Britain’, but as “the most audacious, mysterious, sexy, absurd, perverse, glamorous, hilarious, honest, cocky, melodramatic, mesmerising band you’re ever likely to fall in love with.”

And this leads us back, finally, to The Drowners.

Released on May 11th 1992 as a double A Side with To The Birds, The Drowners peaked at a not insignificant number 49 on the UK charts at the time of release, however it would later go on to hit an impressive Number 17 in July 2023 for one week as a thirtieth anniversary reissue, albeit in a time when chart positions don’t mean all that much.

Suede would often be touted as some kind of antithesis to the Grunge which dominated the airwaves in the early 1990s, however, The Drowners’ opening chords could, in some sense, be described as “grungy”. They’re hard and powerful and dirty. Not dirty in the greasy-haired grunge sense, but in a way that oozes sex. This is what truly sets Suede apart.

In the Channel 4 Documentary Opening Shot, Everett True, at the time assistant editor at Melody Maker, explains: “the critics loved them [Suede] (...) because they are exactly the same as everything they grew up with. They hark back to an era of rock and roll that critics understand, 1993 down the front at the Hammersmith Odeon watching David Bowie.” I feel that this perspective, whilst it may have some truth to it, is rather an oversimplification and focuses primarily on Suede’s image (cobbled together from charity shops and largely consisting of whatever they could find). Suede only have as much in common with Bowie as any of their contemporaries, it feels like a rather lazy comparison.

Anderson’s vocals have once again assumed new inflections and has a great deal more character, not to mention confidence. Listening to the Rocking Horse Demo, which is a much rawer, grittier take, the first thing that sticks out are, indeed, the vocals. They’re sung in near falsetto, they’re a little girlish and coquettish. Inviting, sexy. If there’s one way that The Drowners can be described, it’s certainly sexy. The rhythm of the guitar line, the pounding drums, the pleading of Anderson’s vocals.

There’s the ambiguity of it all, too, as Anderson describes how “we kiss in his room”. Is this the room of a third party? A male partner? Or is he singing from a woman’s perspective? It’s kept completely open, and this ambiguity is something that will become a theme throughout Suede’s catalogue.

Interestingly, two music videos were shot. One for the UK market by Lindy Heymann, which depicts the band flouncing around a white soundstage intercut with footage of Anderson and an unnamed girl walking around a manky railway bridge in Camden (now a pilgrimage spot for avid Suede fans, complete with an unofficial blue plaque), and another for the US market, depicting a kind of frantic gig scene with fans, real fans, clamoring for a piece of the boys on the stage, before it devolves into a foam party. I feel the latter captures the song considerably better. It's so thrilling, sexy, dirty and primal. It's everything Suede are, and everything that drew me to them.

At the time of writing, this is the song that Anderson uses as his excuse to do his crowd walk, wading through a sea of adoring fans. It's fitting, with the use of the “we” pronoun (another characteristic of Suede lyrics), creating a convivial experience. Whilst the power dynamic between band and crowd will always place the band upon a higher footing, oftentimes literally, at this moment he becomes one with his audience. It's also a chance for Mat Osman and Richard Oakes to really shine.

Although, the production on The Drowners, and Suede’s back catalogue as a whole, I feel does Osman rather poorly. He's a truly accomplished bass player who creates some truly incredible baselines which compliment and tie together the songs so perfectly, and combined with Gilbert’s ferocious drumming, it's truly a match made in rhythm section heaven. The bass, though is so often disappointingly low in the mix, and so can only be heard with the highest quality headphones.

Anderson admits part of this would likely be due to how he listened to music throughout his adolescence, on a cheap sound system which cut out the low tones. The recent remasters rectify this somewhat, but it still rather feels a shame.

All in all, The Drowners is a delightful, sleazy, beautiful introduction to the world of a band who still aren't given the credit they're due.

If you enjoy what I write, please consider buying me a coffee! https://ko-fi.com/suedesongs

[banerpg]

At the center of a cluster of ancient towers stands the Citadel, the pinnacle point of Vinnesse raised atop the cliffside where great swells curl in from the North Sea and lash against cragged rock. It is a harsh region of howling wind that carries the taste of brine up from the tide spray; a fierce nature that seems to mimic the power of its inhabiting mages. The fellowship is welcomed in strides, wandering the soaring infrastructures beneath keen stares until all arrive to convene within a grave chamber that bears an aura of severity. Its effects are black in colour and all carved from dark stone, the edges of the furnishings seemingly honed by a whetstone — nearly sharp enough to cut the skin, if you catch it just right. It is there they pledge their lives to the destruction of the gauntlet, the arcane artefact peering into the minds of its new sentry from the round table's core. It is oxidised and black, merely another relic of the Great War to the unwitting eye. But when it begins to whisper to those twelve minds, it is swiftly enveloped by elven cloth and eased away. A moon surpasses them. And during this time, DARK HEIR and BONE PYRE pore over maps late into the night, exchanging thoughts and expertise on the best course through The Black Valley from a cumulation of their travels. They are aided by the scholar GRAVE RELIC, familiar with the archives of Vinnesse and even NIGHT SHRIKE, who shifts into a generously sized kestrel to retrieve an aged atlas that collects dust upon the top shelf. But it is not as quiet as they'd prefer during its study, and BLACK OATH'S eye strays once towards the echo of elevated tones. In the room across them, the council challenges GOD BURNER'S decision to join the quest, and the display leaves STORM SAINT with a centuries old headache. LOST POET idly strums a tune, stalling in their explanation as to why an earlier sparring session with FALSE KNIGHT went so poorly if they are supposed to be a trained knight. The lamp keeping the charts aglow runs low on oil, and before DUSK BLADE can break from the flip of their knife to fetch another, LIGHT BRINGER succeeds in conjuring a sphere of light. Someone spares an appreciative word in their direction, but BLOOD OMEN looks on in disdain, lounging on a settee with a pair of guards at their back.

𝐁𝐀𝐍𝐄𝐑𝐏𝐆 is now open for interactions ! For our opening setting, it has been one week since the fellowship has arrived in Vinnesse and it is their last day before they officially set out on their journey to destroy the gauntlet in Antirac. Feel free to drop all open starters or in the respective tag ( bane.start ), as well as toss a link in our starter channel in the discord, especially if it's an open thread there. Make sure you're following everyone on the blogroll and I look forward to writing with you all soon ( all threads should be set within Vinnesse unless writing out a past scenario ). A final reminder that threads taking place on tumblr must be made with the beta editor + xkit rewritten ( if you need any help with this, please do not hesitate to ask ). Part one of our first chapter will only last for roughly a week or two at max as it's meant as a soft start to help everyone settle into both the world and your characters, and part two will officially see them on the road.

[percentageweirdo]

Hi!! This is so freaking cool!!! I love love love seeing charts and graphs and tables like these. Is your data gathering process just watching through and making notes of each roll type you’re tracking? Again, this is super awesome and I’m so excited to see more stuff from you!

Hi, thank you so much! Me too, and I'm so glad other people are interested. I'm working on Escape from the Bloodkeep right now and it's coming right up, but stuff got busy with me! (All good stuff though.)

Great question! Your guess is basically right. I am using the transcripts available on the Dimension 20 Wiki, scrolling through them for any mention of rolls or numbers (and re-living the season as a result, which is fun) but whenever I am unsure of a roll, I open the episode and watch it for myself to confirm.

For example, in one of the early episodes of Fantasy High Zac rolled a 20, and I couldn't tell from the transcript alone wether it was nat or mod. Usually it is stated out loud by the player, or Brennan, or one of the other players, but in this case it was not. When I watched it myself though, he stated that it was a 20 right away, without looking at his sheet, only the die, absolutely immediately and with a happy tone. I took a (pretty safe imho) educated guess and counted it as a nat 20. Later, someone else (I think Ally) got a nat 20 on something (I feel like it was initiative?) and Zac said "I got a 20 as well!" or something to that effect, confirming to me within reasonable doubt that he had probably meant a nat 20 that first time as well. I do try to take note of these logical assumptions in the spreadsheet though, just to keep myself honest. That way I could also remove the doubt factors later and see if they change anything.

It's also pretty common for Brennan to ask everyone to roll perception or something like that. Sometimes one of the players will not announce their roll, but I will still count it as a regular, non-crit roll. In these situations I presume that they did roll but it was a 7 or something and someone else had a 25 so they didn't feel like it added anything to vocalize that roll. In these cases, I also make a note of the fact that it was an unvocalized but presumed "everyone roll [skill]" type of roll. I do genuinely trust these comedians to report when they got a nat 1, because usually the outcome is funny or interesting.

I'm only really worried about missing the initative crits, because they may get edited out since they happen right at the end of the ep usually. I do feel like the editors are choosing to show when a player gets a 1 or a 20 or initative though, so it's probably fine. Kind of the caveat for this whole account is that I can't count rolls they don't announce. :��

-

EDIT: Just realised I neglected a part of this question!

So yes, I do account for type of roll. The spreadsheet columns are: Season, Episode, Player, Die roll (1, 20, or / for other), Type of roll (Skill Check, Attack Roll, et.c.), Subtype of roll (Dexterity, Wisdom, et.c.), Advantage/Disadvantage (usually blank, sometimes either A or D) and then Other Roll for if they had advantage or disadvantage. The final column is Notes.

Sometimes I have to guess what kind of roll something is, for example if it's unclear wether something was perception or investigation and the player failed to specify. For these I tend to lean perception except with Murph, who has better investigation as Riz and always chooses it when he has a choice between the two. I also make note of these assumptions!

[thesabrinatheteenagewitchblog]

Some big Sabrina horror news today, starting off with Madam Satan featuring in "The Cursed Library: Alpha" miniseries releasing between August to October! (Images and details from ArchieComics.com) Sabrina and Salem feature in sone of the covers!

Dark worlds converge in August when Archie Comics opens the doors to THE CURSED LIBRARY, an all-new premium-printed limited series that unites Archie’s three main horror heroines — and its various one-shot comics — in one explosive storyline by writers Magdalene Visaggio (ETERNITY GIRL) and Eliot Rahal (BLEED THEM DRY) with art by Craig Cermak (RED TEAM).

“The CURSED LIBRARY event that Mags and I have been asked to helm is unlike any other moment in Archie Comics history,” Rahal said. “It’s both a throughline and nexus point that weaves together everything in the Archie Horror universe that’s happened so far. Its goal is to provide shape to the world that has been created. THE CURSED LIBRARY is essentially saying: ‘All of this matters. There is a fabric.’”

Archie Horror readers have been treated to a series of standalone one-shot comics in recent years that can be enjoyed as chilling ghost stories and campfire tales, but eagle-eyed fans will have noticed hints of connection, which came to a head in last fall’s MADAM SATAN: HELL ON EARTH. That story ended with Madam Satan, the escaped Queen of Hell, captured by Jinx Holliday, a teenager interested in magic and rock ‘n’ roll who is rumored to be Satan’s daughter. Jinx is often aided by her loyal best friend Danni, who made global headlines last summer when she was revealed to be Archie’s first transgender character. While all three protagonists have charted their own course thus far, their worlds collide in THE CURSED LIBRARY when each will be tested as Danni descends into the depths of Hell to save her friend’s soul — and the world.

“This is an ambitious project led by two of the best writers we’ve had the pleasure of working with on our horror titles, and, honestly, two of the best writers in comics, period,” said Archie Comics Senior Director of Editorial Jamie L. Rotante. “I have the ultimate trust in them to craft a story that is layered, poignant, and still metal AF. This feels like the culmination of almost everything I’ve personally worked on as an editor, and I’m thrilled that I get to watch Eliot and Mags create a world (or rather, convergence of worlds) that I’m, frankly, in awe of. This is not just a love letter to our fans, but to the art of storytelling as a whole, complemented by the stunning artwork of Craig Cermak.”

Cermak has made a big impact on the Archie Horror line, having illustrated Jinx’s horror adventures and the initial appearances of The Cursed Library itself, a mysterious collection of books that seem to chronicle the events depicted in recent one-shot comics like CAMP PICKENS and BETTY: THE FINAL GIRL. “It’s been exciting to go on this journey with Jinx and see it develop into something much grander,” Cermak said. “Building on top of all the various horror tales featuring so many great Archie characters is providing such a gratifying opportunity as an artist, with so much great material from which to pull.”

Reiko Murakami

Rahal has written all of Madam Satan’s modern adventures, relating the anti-hero’s struggle against Satan and her efforts to chart her own destiny. Madam Satan is one of Archie Comics’ oldest characters, debuting in PEP COMICS #16 in 1941. She was reintroduced as Sabrina’s antagonist in the horror series CHILLING ADVENTURES OF SABRINA, which was adapted as a Netflix streaming series in 2018. Visaggio is the architect of Jinx’s modern resurgence, where she is an older and more macabre version of the classic Archie humor character known as Li’l Jinx, who first appeared in PEP COMICS #62 in 1947. Visaggio scripted Danni’s return alongside Jinx and her solo star turn in last year’s STRANGE SCIENCE one-shot. Danni first appeared in DILTON’S STRANGE SCIENCE in 1989 as an equally brilliant friend and foil to Dilton, Riverdale’s resident genius. The talents of, and more importantly, the bonds between all three women will be the focus of THE CURSED LIBRARY.

“I think what I love and am most proud of is that this connectivity is secondary to the story,” Rahal added. “THE CURSED LIBRARY can stand alone because, at its heart, this is the culmination of two stories: Madam Satan’s and Jinx’s. These two characters have had painful journeys of self-discovery and are finally meeting their climax –– but it’s all wrapped up in the Apocalypse. It’s both the end and a new beginning. And by the time we’ve closed the chapter on the Cursed Library, the Archie Horror line will be diving into a very new and exciting future.”

THE CURSED LIBRARY: ALPHA releases August 21 in comic shops nationwide, with colors by Matt Herms, lettering by Jack Morelli, and open-to-order variant covers by Robert Hack, Soo Lee, and Reiko Murakami. It will be available for pre-order on May 24. The first issue will be followed by OMEGA in September and the final chapter, UNBOUND, in October.

The Cursed Library: Alpha

This is it… this is the moment our horror one-shots have led to… THE CURSED LIBRARY! When we last left off in MADAM SATAN: HELL ON EARTH, Jinx has the former Queen of the Underworld trapped in the mysterious library, as her father-bestowed demon powers have intensified. To stop Jinx from becoming like her father, her best friend Danni Malloy must rescue and convince Madam Satan to guide her through Hell itself to find the one thing that can possibly save her friend’s soul––Jinx’s mom. Along the way, they’ll also discover a number of faces they’ve seen before, though only in the pages of the terrifying tomes within the cursed library. This three-issue limited series horror event tells a story about the bonds that tie us together and how the only thing that can save the world from evil is radical love. It’s Riverdale’s Return of the Jedi meets Dante’s Inferno. A three-part event that will close the door on the Cursed Library and usher in a whole new chapter of horror stories.

Script: Eliot Rahal, Magdalene Visaggio

Art: Craig Cermak

Colors: Matt Herms

Letters: Jack Morelli

Cover: Craig Cermak

Variant Covers: Robert Hack, Soo Lee, Reiko Murakami

On Sale Date: 8/21

32-page, full color comic

$4.99 U.S.

[alienaiver]

Chapter 3: Collision [FINAL]

Chapter summary: You're traveling to the duchy where the root of the issues might be. The bond with your advisor deepens and truths are unconvered, in every sense of the word.

Warnings for this chapter: someone gets stabbed in this, and another get an arrow to the head so uh. warnings for that? theres also some in-fighting but its not like, dramatic overkill!

Wordcount: 12k [...hehe]

Chapter content: fluff, sfw, fantasy AU, royalty AU, MEDIUM!!! angst, genderneutral reader, poc and bodytype!friendly reader, no use of y/n, more ‘your majesty‘, im bullshitting my astrology knowledge i apologize to ppl who actually knows shit, happy ending, kissing is minor but THERE IS KISSING, THERES STABBING AND BLOOD HERE THO, descriptions of fights/battles but im not very sufficient in them so it  stays light LMFAO,

notes: i APOLOGIZE MY ASS OFF FOR THE DELAY. i got hit by an intense ass flu, so i could barely text normally the past week!! BUT HERE IT IS.... my god. this world. i have so much more information and world building that will never see the light of day. i wanted to still keep the focus on suga and reader, so i apologize if some of my world building has felt like it falls short now that its done. it was mostly just to show there was more, without diving deeper. i also have intricate backstories for everyone involved and love charts LMFAAAAAO. the economic history has been worked on as well even tho no economy is shown here LMFAO MY DUMBASS  DOING MATH. if youd like me to expand on other characters or other parts, i might be feeling up to it heheeh<33333 ENJOY!!! im gonna go treat myself to my friend’s ice cream in my freezer JFESKJFSK

ALSO in tryibg to fix the spaces between paragraphs, but tumblr's new psot editor is messing w me. so please bear w me! 🧡 (if youd like to avoid the spacing issue until im able to fix it, theres no issues in ao3! the link to the story is on the series masterlist!) ✨

previous ┋ series masterlist ┋ first chapter

Sugawara’s sitting in the servant’s kitchens, drinking ale with Sawamura and Azumane.

Or more truthfully put, Sawamura and Azumane are drinking ale. Sugawara’s fighting to stay awake and stay part of their current subject. They’re talking animatedly in front of him but he can’t for the life of him follow suit. You’re currently eating a leisurely lunch with Bokuto and his fiancé, Akaashi Keiji, in the gardens before they’re taking their leave tomorrow and travel back to the empire.

You’ve given Sugawara time off but he hardly knows how to pass such hours anymore. There’s always something to do – so when both Azumane and Sawamura was off as well, they all decided to eat lunch together.

“You need to work less, Suga.” Sawamura scolds, his hand pushing at Sugawara’s plate as to regain his attention. He brushes him off as he stifles a yawn, “thanks for the encouragement Daichi, but it’s just sleep that’s the issue, is all.”

Azumane frowns in concern but isn’t sure how to convince Sugawara either, “we never see you around anymore,” he tries and Sugawara smiles, “I appreciate your concern Asahi, however, to support my crown I will do what it takes.”

They both shake their heads and Sugawara sighs as he leans his head in his palm, “I like what I do, you know? It enriches me. When I look at them, all I see is the bright future that shines on Karasuno. They just need a push, is all.”

They nod in unison, “yeah, there’s something to agree on. They have the proper air around them, too.” Sawamura sighs as he crosses his arms, a satisfactory smile on his lips. Azumane smiles too as he takes a sip of his ale, “they’ve come so far. Nothing has brought me greater joy than supporting them through it all.”

Sugawara sends Azumane a beaming smile, “exactly! You spend just as much time with the crown as I do – so there’s no problem, right?”

They laugh and shake their heads at him, “there’s nothing we can say to make you change trajectory anyways, Suga. But please remember to rest.”

The talk branches off to different subjects – mainly Sawamura’s complaints about the new troublemakers in his personnel. They’re talented with weapons and hard-working, but the barracks has never been as chaotic as they are right now. It’s giving Sawamura new wrinkles to worry about.

Sugawara zones out of the conversation as he thinks back to late last night. He’d found you in the map room – the room that had unofficially become your meeting place – exhausted. The bags under your eyes were hardly possible to hide on top of the greying of your skin. After that afternoon where he’d helped you sleep some moons ago, there’d been no repeats and he wasn’t so arrogant to suggest his help himself to the crown. He might’ve even done it wrong for all he knows.

You’d sat with your head resting in your hands, looking pointedly at documents in front of you but Sugawara had a feeling you weren’t looking at anything of this world.

He’d been right.

You hadn’t registered his appearing and the moment he cleared his throat you’d jumped up from the chair with fear and panic in your widened eyes. His arms had shot up to show he meant no harm and as you’d registered his face, you’d become visibly calmer.

Sugawara had ended up going to the guard’s kitchens to grab a bowl of the hot porridge always freshly served for any guards on night duty and spoon-feeding it to you. He’s sure it had been awkward for you, even if you were the one who suggested that he did so, but for him it was an entirely different experience. He’d felt your breath on his hand when it came close to your face and he swore he had almost felt your heart beating, that’s how close he’d been.

He can’t possibly tell of this to Sawamura and Azumane – the teasing would be relentless.

Midday turns to late afternoon and as the sun is slowly setting behind the mountains, Sugawara is called upon by a maid. You’re in his study and require him to attend you.

When he reaches the door left ajar, he sneaks a peek before announcing himself. You’re standing by his window, your hand outreached towards the stained glass, admiring the light’s reflection onto your palm. the sun bounces off of you and leaves you in an ethereal glow. You remind him of the bright guiding star on the night sky.

This is when you’re the most beautiful, Sugawara thinks and holds his breath.

You retract your arm from the sun’s rays and drag your fingers over some of the books on his shelves. It’s the fictional section and he feels a touch of embarrassment at your possible scrutiny. He hears a low chuckle leave you as stop by a small row with a few children’s books. They’re worn out – mostly because he’s used them when telling stories and teaching children how to use letters, but also simply from age. They’re the first gift from his mentor and he holds them close in his heart.

To Sugawara’s surprise, you turn around and look directly at him. Then, you let out a surprised yelp when you see him. Your hand travels to your chest, “oh, I apologize Sugawara, I neither saw nor heard you.” you laugh and he shakes his head and bows lightly, “no the fault is mine, your majesty. I apologize for startling you.”

You laugh it off and sit yourself down by his desk, “the lunch with Bokuto went well, I take it?” he asks as he rounds the armchair to sit down, keeping his gaze on you. You hum out a reply as you settle better into his chair, dragging your open palms over his desk, “I’ll miss him and Akaashi when they leave. You’re joining us for supper, correct? It won’t be for the full court, for the sake of privacy.” Sugawara raises his eyebrows but keeps his stare level, “pardon?” he asks and you chuckle, “I’d like you to be there. The chefs are making your favorite.”

His favorite?

The chefs – who cook for the royal court – is making his favorite meal from his hometown? A nervous laugh escapes him, “your majesty, are you serving spiced tofu to your royal visitors?”

A smile as mischievous as your personality graces your features as you nod, “I’m sure Bokuto and Akaashi will enjoy it as well! And I’m curious about it too. It’s been on my mind since you told me about it.”

Maybe he shouldn’t have, he thinks for a short panicked moment.

He’s not sure how highly spiced the chefs will prepare it – hopes it won’t be – but he can’t be certain. His dream isn’t to offend the royal tastebuds of his crown and other royal entities. You bark out a laugh, one that comes deep within your stomach and sound off of the room, “you seem perplexed, Sugawara.”

Sugawara nods, “do you enjoy spiced food, your majesty?”

You smile, big and proud, “I can take anything.”

You couldn’t.

Since you’d been so wise to ask the chefs to create it as true to its original form, the spice level had been nothing to scoff at. In your defense, Sugawara thinks you’re holding out really well, considering.

Bokuto’s handling it worse than you, constantly scarfing down the offered milk while Akaashi enjoys it in silence. Sugawara’s not sure whether or not that’s positive, but decides to take it as a win either way. The dinner drags on with the minstrel playing for them struggling to keep a neutral face. Sugawara’s not sure telling Azumane and Sawamura about this spectacle in front of him would count as treason against the crown.

“You’re in love with them, aren’t you?”

Sugawara’s chokes on his own spit at Akaashi’s blunt question during the final evening walk of the gardens. It’s become a habit during their stay, and you and Bokuto are currently walking further ahead, opting for conversational privacy for a few short moments. Sugawara hadn’t expected Akaashi to speak much to him, let alone confront him like this. Akaashi smiles and looks up at the sky, “the night sky’s so beautiful out here. It reminds me of the place where Bokuto proposed to me.”

Sugawara nods, confusion evident on his face, “that does indeed sound romantic, your majesty.”

Akaashi nods his head towards you, “they like the stars too, don’t they? You should take advantage of that knowledge.”

Before Sugawara can ask him to elaborate, Bokuto calls on them both and he gives Sugawara a court smile, “I think the chances align in your favor, dear advisor.” And with that, he walks up to Bokuto and kisses him on the cheek.

It takes Sugawara a few short moments to restart his mind, being called out of his stupor by you, asking if he’d like to retreat for the night. There’s a question for concern hidden in the syllables and the gentleness of your gaze that makes his palms sweat.

                                                          ///    

Bokuto and Akaashi departs your kingdom without further incident, and Sugawara feels like he can finally relax in several days. The moment Bokuto and his entourage has left the courtyard, Sugawara notices how your shoulders slump slightly as well. It must’ve been more draining for you than he can even imagine. While you and Bokuto are on much more even ground, he’s sure the need to pose correctly still lingers at all times.

“Sugawara, what does the court say about my marriage opportunities?”

He tries to keep his face as neutral as possible, to hide the surprise from the sudden question in the middle of your lunch in the map room. You haven’t been in here for longer than small moments while Bokuto had been visiting, so it’s nice to finally sit in here again, just the two of you. To gain a moment where he can gather himself, Sugawara takes a bite of his bread and hums, signaling that he needs to finish chewing. You wait patiently with a neutral expression.

He then brushes his palms against each other to get rid of any loose breadcrumbs, “there currently aren’t any official suitors, if that’s what you’re asking.”

You smile and take a sip of your tea, placing it down gently, “my question pertained more in regard to our laws. With whom can I marry? What are my restrictions?”

Sugawara swallows thickly again, letting his mind stay close to simple facts and not emotions, “well there’s quite a bit of history there. In the olden days, the crown was allowed to appoint anyone – although most of the weddings still related mostly to those of royal blood, your great-great-grandmother married a commoner – to which her son was so enraged that the bloodline was sullied,” you both make a grimace at this part of the story, “that he forbade such matrimonies when he ascended the throne.”

You sigh and deflate down into the chair, “what an unsettling man.” Sugawara nods in agreement and gently folds his napkin over the plate to signal that he finished eating, “a lot of laws were created during his reign that most don’t agree with.”

”I can’t imagine he was very popular.”

Sugawara tuts at you, “now, now, your majesty. You mustn’t speak ill of the dead.”

You sigh and give him a look – one that signals that it may not matter as much to you. Sugawara then clears his throat and with a voice pitched higher than he’d have liked, asks, “a-anyways, what brought this on, your majesty? If I may be so presumptuous to ask.”

You tense up suddenly, clearing your own throat and hastily gathering your cutlery on your plate, clearing your throat a second time before you answer, “oh! Oh, well. Akaashi’s a commoner and it just… it got me thinking, you know?” your hand travels to the back of your neck to scratch while you let out a soft laugh. Sugawara smiles gently at you, happy to hear you might’ve found someone – even if he thinks you should focus on your duties for an extended period of time before marrying (that’s what he tells himself is the reason, at least, when he’s back in his own sleeping chambers that night). You don’t bring up the subject again, and Sugawara tells himself he shouldn’t pry.

                                                          ///    

Sawamura walks around the map room, his armor newly polished and shiny. You’re sitting upright in a chair with Sugawara standing next to you, arms on his back. Azumane’s there too, sitting on a stool to the right of the table. Sawamura’s waiting for his underlings to arrive, his eyebrows getting more and more furrowed with every moment they’re leaving him waiting. The mood is tense in the room and you’re afraid of making small-talk – you can’t stifle the yawn that threatens to spill and look at Azumane, who you inevitably infect with the need as well. He gives you a reassuring smile and just then you hear the sounds of someone yelling as the sound of their armor indicates that they’re running in your direction.

Sawamura hurries to the door and lets out a hushed but no less powerful, “hey!” which makes Hinata and Kageyama halt in their movements. He ushers them inside and sigh deeply, “your behavior could cost a life on a battlefield,” he scolds and you hurry to get up with a kind smile, “luckily it wasn’t on the battlefield, Sawamura, let us excuse this honest blunder and get started, shall we?” you send Hinata and Kageyama a look that you hope shows them you won’t bail them out of a scolding a second time.

It’s past 3AM and the moon’s high in the sky. You’ve all rendezvoused in the map room to plan what you hope will stay a secret plan until you’ve left the keep in a few days.

The information that Bokuto offered you has meant tremendously in the investigation and yesterday you finally convinced Sugawara to let you go with them as they’re traveling to the Hiashi duchy to figure it all out once for and for all. There are gaps in the knowledge that the kingdom pertains and what seems to be the actual reality.

You’d like the arrival to the duchy to be as quiet as possible, gaining momentum before a possible uprising will occur if the news reach them before their arrival. Sawamura originally wanted two other guards with him, more seasoned ones he knows and trusts well, but Hinata is from the area that you’re going to, and Sugawara convinced Sawamura of the importance of someone they already trust as a local.

Sawamura goes over your travel route, of the places and areas where you’ll be resting. There’ll be tent-sleeping and as little contact to the people of the kingdom as possible. Your face is already known and he won’t risk this information breaching containment. His guards are well underway packing all of your needs and supplies – you will all travel as light as possible, meaning everyone will have to carry their weight. As he says this, he gives you an apologetic look that makes you snort out loud, “I am fully capable, sir. There shan’t be any complaints from my shoulders.”

You miss the proud gleam from your advisor as Azumane reaches for your shoulder to give it a reassuring squeeze.

The plan is simple, really. For you, it feels like an adventurous and exciting quest but you know, based on Sawamura’s tight demeanor, that there’ll be dangers lurking. He wouldn’t bring in so many neutral guards to travel in the radius around you if it wasn’t – not to mention his loud protests when you demanded to join him.

Sugawara had to calm him down after that and it wasn’t until that moment you realized the weight you’ve put on his shoulders by joining this mission – he’d already lost your father to a faceless enemy. One he’s hopefully going to face again if the outcome of this hunt goes right. What if he isn’t strong enough to protect you as well?

                                                          ///    

It turns out there wasn’t much for him to worry about, as you’re at the end of the first week of traveling with no issues. The fears Sawamura conjured in all of your minds on the night you left seems so far away now, with the quiet travels you’ve experienced. You’re in one of the middle duchies, Kogeno, and the weather tonight is clear and fresh. Spring is nearing and the tips of the mountains aren’t all white anymore.

Yesterday, Sugawara showed you one of the spring flowers in bloom. Kageyama accidentally trampled it down with the mule shortly after.

You’ve taken a liking to the night shifts. You’re traveling with two tents, one for you and one for the rest of them – you’ve tried protesting this multiple times, seeing no need to carry both when there’d be room for you in theirs. None of them has accepted that, though, fiercely arguing about your title as crown and theirs as commoners. You aren’t sure how to tell them it’s lonely without sounding too much like a child. Azumane sometimes comes in and holds your hand, but you know he leaves your tent shortly after you’ve dozed off.

Night shifts are less lonely since no one takes them alone. You’ve gotten closer to Hinata, learning about his hometown and his dream of becoming a knight. How no one believed him and he was ridiculed for such a dream due to his short stature. He’d proudly puffed out his chest the night you’d told him that you’d appoint him a title after the travels were over, “I’ll even send home an official letter to your family.” You’d added with a wink, and his eyes had turned bigger than you thought possible.

The day after, Sugawara had scolded you that you mustn’t make such promises to such a young guard. You’d dismissed him.

Tonight, you and Sugawara has the shift together. You take a sip of your tea and sigh, “it sure is quaint out here,” you muse and Sugawara chuckles, “you seem to have fallen quite in love with the countryside.”

You look at him longingly and smile, “well, it’s quite the view.”

He doesn’t notice how your gaze lingers on him and just smiles into the distance, “it is. I haven’t ever been this far south.”

You wrap yourself up more in the blanket that Sugawara draped over you earlier, when your watch started. You then gather the courage to ask him, “are you happy with your work?”

You’re not sure if he turns his head to look at you or not, your eyes fixated on a rock further ahead in your line of vision, afraid that his answer might not be what you’re looking for. You spent so many years admiring the relationship between your father and his advisor, counting down the days until you’d be the one bound in an oath like that. You’re not sure it is what you expected.

You’re not sure you’re supposed to look at his lips so much.

Sugawara sighs and stretches his arms, “it sure is work, your majesty.”

It takes a moment for you to register his joke, to understand that he’s making fun of you, your expression not as schooled as you’d like it to be. You kick his shin and he chuckles before taking a sip of his own tea. It’s elfbark, harvested a few days prior when he took you foraging – he’d even held your hand as you went over a creek.

“There’s no greater thing for me to do, your majesty. I told you, remember? That I dreamt of grandness, to help the Karasuno Kingdom reclaim its former glory before the Third Age.”

You hum out a reply and look into the fire in front of you, “do you think I shall be able to achieve that? Continue my father’s work?”

Sugawara puts down his cup and leans closer to you, his brown boot lightly touching yours. A way to make a connection. You notice the dirt on the leather. You think this may be the first time you’ve ever had boots this dirty outside of the keep. Sugawara points up at the night sky,

“You remind me of the guiding star, your majesty. Your glow is magnificent and empowering, you’ll lead this country to greatness. Do you not trust the Farseers?”

You huff out a laugh, trying to hide the flustered expression on your face by looking back at the tents, avoiding his intense gaze, “it is not that I do not trust them, Sugawara, but being called the ‘Bringer of Serenity’ feels like a title meant for someone else.” you admit, for the first time out loud to anyone ever since the premonition was brought to you by the Farseer clan when you were just short of 14. You’re not sure when you started to feel like an impostor. It’s been a while since those thoughts journeyed your mind last.

You haven’t had such thoughts since Sugawara came into your life.

“You’re my earth, Sugawara.”

You blurt it out before you can stop yourself – before you can think through the heaviness of the words. Spiraling in your mind, you don’t notice the way Sugawara’s breath hitches or the way his eyes widen, his mouth hanging open. There’s a silence stretching between you until Sugawara manages to close his mouth and bite his lip.

“Pardon, your majesty?”

You can’t retract it now – you might as well be honest. Didn’t your father always tell you to never hide any parts of yourself for your advisor?

You heave in a big breath, “you ground me. I may be a star to you, up in the sky where nothing can reach me. But I get to admire you, look at you. To be reminded of who I’m shining for. A constant reassurance that you’ll always be there.”

Sugawara doesn’t reply to you immediately and you cough into your sleeve to hide your face, not able to look him in the eye just yet.

As the silence stretches out you whine and give in and look up at him. Sugawara’s simply looking at you with the warm smile that makes your insides melt. If it weren’t for the darkness of the night, you’d know that his lash line is wet, but he gets to keep that information to himself. You raise an eyebrow, “’cause you will always be here…. Right?”

His warm and affectionate smile turns into a face splitting grin, the gooey mess in your stomach suddenly sprouting wings and flying rapidly, desperately around inside you, “of course, your majesty.”

A few more days pass in peace, the setting up of tents your biggest worry. There are two mules with you, ones that Kageyama and Hinata takes care of. It’s not until you’re at the borders between Kogeno and Hiashi that trouble arise. There’re scouts positioned in a two-and-a-half-mile radius traveling alongside you, even if you’d insisted there was no need. Sawamura hadn’t budged on the subject and the hardened look he’d given you made you shrink in on yourself, remembering the burden you’ve put on him.

Some scouts didn’t report back to Sawamura and some went missing. Sawamura’s sitting by the fire with Sugawara, a tense silence draped over them. “I think it’d be safer to return with the crown.” Sawamura says, his eyebrows furrowed. Sugawara hums, “I’m not sure they’ll do that. They’re just as determined as you are, if not more.”

Sawamura heaves a big sigh as he straightens his back, lifts his arms above his head and gain a satisfying pop of joints. Sugawara scrunches his nose up at the noise – he’ll never be one to enjoy that sound.

“Won’t they listen to you?”

Sugawara scoffs out a laugh as he takes a sip of his mug of ale, “as capable as they recognize me to be, if their heart is set on something, none of my academic words will matter.”

You’re all out in the woods with no one around you, so everyone lets their guard down. There’s quiet, only the sounds of critters. Sawamura flinches a few times but Sugawara doesn’t notice.

The mules, which are tied up next to your tent, start whinnying and moving restlessly, and that’s when Sugawara notices.

There’s a fire at the side of your tent.

He flies up, his mug thrown to the ground as he runs towards the entrance, glad to see the fire’s still small. “Daichi!” he calls as he hurls open the latch of the cotton door. Sawamura yells in the distance and out of his peripheral vision he sees Kageyama and Hinata jump out of their tent.

You’re asleep. He flies to his knees in front of your bedding, “your majesty!” he calls and you open your eyes, confused and disoriented, “we have to get out!” is all Sugawara says before he pulls you against him and out of the tent. You both land on the ground outside, coughing.

There are other people now. Sugawara belatedly hears the clashing of swords, commands and running. It takes him a moment to orient himself, shielding you underneath him on the ground. You start to claw at his arms, “I can fight too!” you yell, and he hushes you, “we’re not sure what our enemy is here,” he half-whispers as he makes a headcount. He’s not sure if they’ve noticed you’re out of your tent, alive. You grab on to the ground underneath you and manage to crawl free of Sugawara’s grasp, running to your sword placed by the supplies, ready to grab and defend with if needed.

There’s more yelling, and you manage to land a hit on someone using an axe. Commands of killing the crown are shouted all around you and Sawamura’s back hits yours, “your majesty, please escape.” He says and you let out a hysterical scoff, “I’m not”- you land a hit on the hip of the enemy in front of you- “leaving you all behind!” you finish, shouting as you kick the person away. They fall to the ground, weapon lost on the way down. The fire from your tent lights up the place in an almost magnificent glow.

Someone shouts something about daggers, you think it might be Hinata. You turn your head, and then you see it.

The dagger hurled toward you makes your eyes widen in fear, freezing you into place. You want to dodge – knows how to, yet you’re unable. You hear the shouting of your men from all around you, amplified by the sound of weapons continually clashing. You’re able to filter out Sugawara’s voice in all the noise as he calls your name – your name. It’s the first time you hear him use it and you almost want to scoff at how the mind processes all of this in such short moments. This must be what it feels like to know you’ll die. An image of your father appears in your mind.

And then you’re roughly pushed to the ground, exclaiming a groan at the impact with another human, hearing his cry into your shoulder as you both crash onto the ground. All sounds are now muffled and you feel intensely the pressure on your ribs from the weight of the other, the pebbles digging into your hip from the ground and then, then you feel a warm liquid trickle down over your collarbone and jaw. You briefly wonder if it’s yours but can, in those short seconds, locate no penetrated part of you that’d make you bleed, heaving in a deep breath filled with the dust of the ground.

Your eyes travel to the tuft of grey hair tickling your cheek and it’s then the bubble that had closed your ears pop sharply, making every sound all too loud and all too much again. On top of you, Sugawara is groaning in pain before he rolls off to the ground next to you, apologizing in a strained voice for getting blood on you.

The dagger, meant for your heart, is lodged into his shoulder and he’s bent awkwardly in an attempt to hide it from you with his left arm. You desperately pull his other arm away to assess the damage and there’s more than just one scolding going through your mind as you see how much blood is running down over his arm and chest, though no constructive words are able to pass your lips, only panicked one-syllable words. Sugawara’s already heavily damaged, not one used to fighting like this. There’s already bruising forming on his face, his brow split and bleeding. He’s groaning in obvious agony.

Words are being shouted around you and one repeats itself continuously, “run, your majesty!”

It’s not a demand, it’s a plead. Sawamura’s voice sounds desperate and coarse as he fights off another attacker with his sword. The meaning behind the words has changed since he started shouting them at the beginning of the ambush and for the first time since drawing out your sword, you decide to heed his words. You send him a determined nod and his gratitude gives him new power to charge an enemy.

“I’m sorry, Koushi, please hold on,” you whisper and Sugawara starts whining and trashing as you try to carry him off of the ground. His voice is garbled as the four words departs him, “leave me. Hide.”

You laugh, almost hysterically as you get his arm over your shoulders, “you can make this easier for me or not, I won’t leave you.”

The fear of losing Sugawara gives you new strength and while limping on your right leg, you manage to carry the both of you into the nearby bushes off of the road. You have half a mind to look back and check if anyone’s following you, but it’ll slow you down to turn your head, so you decide to trust Sawamura and his men. You know more arrived shortly after the ambush, the back-up guards Sawamura has had stationed in a radius around you ever since you left Karasu Keep. You’re not sure how many successfully fell to the ground up until this point, but hope you’ve outnumbered them by now.

The shouting becomes quieter, the throbbing of your head becoming louder. Out here there’s no light, the bushes and trees blocking off the light from the fire in the camp. Blearily, you locate a bigger bush and decides to push yourself and Sugawara inside of it to hide. He groans loudly at the impact, and as you crawl in next to him, you realize it’s a hawthorn bush. You roll your eyes; it’ll have to do.

You feel the thorns digging into your exposed skin as you try to get on your knees and pull Sugawara’s upper body to your lap gently, trying not to make the damage worse. Judging by his groans and whines, you’re not doing a very good job at it. You feel after the wound and hiss when you realize it’s still bleeding. You’re afraid to pull out the dagger, fearing it’ll make it worse. You’re also afraid it might be poisoned – would these attackers rely on simple luck that it’d pierce either your head or your heart? A dagger to the arm or leg isn’t necessarily fatal.

You apologize to Sugawara in bated breaths as you try to get a grip of your shirt’s side, ripping off as much fabric as you’re able, all the way to your back, where it’s hard to reach. You then lift his arm to wrap it around.

“Remove”-Sugawara coughs and curls in on himself – “the dagger.” He finished and you whine at his command, “what if you’ll bleed more?” and he wheezes out a laugh, “I’m bleeding either way, aren’t I?”

You want to punch him, but decide to do as he says, “here, bite down on this. I don’t want them to hear us,” you rip off the fabric of your sleeve and he bites down onto it, “I’m not sure if I’m supposed to do it quickly or slowly,” you admit and he groans. You apologize again, “I’ll do it quickly, in one”- you put your hands around the handle – “two… and three!”

Sugawara passes out after that.

                                                          ///    

Sugawara’s eyes are heavy as he tries to open them, coated with blood and tears. He hears Sawamura calling out, “Suga! Are you here? Your majesty!” and as he manages to open his right eye, is immediately blinded by the bright light coming in through the branches he’s surrounded by. He feels a weight on top of him and feels arms wrapped tightly around him, almost caging him in. He hears your soft breathing and sees you asleep on top of him.

Your face, beautiful and kind is layered in caked blood and dirt, your lip swollen. His name is called again and as he opens his mouth to reply, he realizes how dry and big his tongue feels. He tries to lick his lips, gather saliva but coughs instead, “in… here,” he manages to croak out but it’s barely even a whisper, his voice strained and hoarser than he’s tried before. He takes in a deep breath, “Daichi!”

Footsteps near them in a fast pace, “bushes,” he manages to wheeze out and that’s when you steer over him, “Sugawara!” you plead as he coughs from the strain, and then Sawamura is standing next to the bushes, “we’ll help you out, don’t worry your majesty, Suga.”

Sugawara’s eyes fall shut again.

He wakes up more comfortable this time, wrapped in blankets and with a pillow underneath his head. He’s back by the camp, and everyone is gathered, in various stages of bruised and hurt – but alive.  

He sighs as he falls back onto the pillow, which makes Daichi look down at him, a gentle expression on his face, “you’re awake.”

Next to him, you’re stirring something together in a cup, blending them as you wait for the kettle to finish boiling – you’re preparing medicine, he realizes. You’re doing it meticulously and with your tongue sticking out in concentration.

Sawamura fills him in on what happened, “it’s the same men as the attack on the former crown,” he clears his throat and takes in a deep breath, “fewer this time. We managed to fight them off, but a few of them escaped – probably to report back to whoever’s behind this.”

You fill in the cup with the water, trying to pour it in the swirling motion that your father taught you, so that the medicine blends better. You haven’t spoken a word to Sugawara yet. He pouts, “that decides this. The crown’s going back.”

He’s never seen you turn your head so fast, “I am most definitely not!”

Sugawara tries to sit up but feel the strain it gives his body, wheezing out a cough. You instinctively reach out to help him, but recoil at the last minute as you see the hardened look he gives you, “there’s no discussion to be had about this. You’re going back to Karasu Keep where you’ll be safe – and alive!”

You scoff at him and get up, “who’s the hurt one here? I can walk and run just fine!” you yell, and everyone at the camp is holding their breath, shifting their gazes between the two of you. Sugawara groans out loud to make a point and sits up higher, “who says you’ll survive the nex-“

“I do! I’ll survive jus-!”

“There’s no heir!”

Everyone freezes. You look at Sugawara with a mixed gaze, surprise and … is it hurt he sees there? He looks pointedly at the ground as he sighs, “Karasuno is teetering on the edge as it is. Losing one crown to an assassination was a hard blow – but losing the next one too? You’re unmarried, you’re childless. Whose head will the crown fall upon? Someone with the kingdom’s interests at heart?”

You slump and almost stagger but stand your ground as much as you’re able. You look him directly into his eyes, and he swallows thickly at the emotions swirling so obviously there, “I’ll survive.” You grit it out, like it’s hard to speak, and he fears it might be for you. He knows his words have hurt you – but he’d rather have you hurt and alive. He’ll gladly become a villain in your mind to keep you in this world. He grits his teeth,

“Take Hinata and go back.”

You laugh and throw your arms in the air, “we’re almost there. Who says I won’t be attacked on the way home, then? Will I be safer with more guards or simply one? And we only have pack-mules and very little supplies. I’ll hardly survive the trip home without making it known that I left!”

Sawamura gets up then and gives Sugawara an apologetic look, “they’re right. It’s safer to keep them with us.”

“Daichi!”

Sawamura sends him a pleading look, begging for him to cooperate, “keeping the crown safe is my priority and responsibility. I cannot guarantee such protection if they’re to stray from my side.”

Sugawara puffs up his cheeks, “you wanted to send them home a few days ago!” he yells, his anger redirected to his best friend. Sawamura lets out an exasperated sigh, “the situation’s changed.”

Sugawara looks around. Azumane, Hinata and Kageyama are all avoiding his gaze. “You can’t be serious!” he yells before he falls back on the makeshift bed and turns to lie on his left side, his back turned to everyone. He has to squeeze his eyes shut to prevent tears from falling.

Kageyama’s standing by the mules, feeding them stray grass he’s found from the side of the road. You come up to him and stand in silence. You’re not sure how to talk to him, though you wish you could. His entire arm is brushed and bandaged and he’s limping just a little bit more than you are.

You sigh as you pet the side of the mule’s head. It leans happily towards you, enjoying the attention. “Should I go back?”

Kageyama whips his head so fast towards you that it surprises you. His face is as hard to read as ever before he pouts, “I’ve never wanted to follow a weak leader,” he gets out and you raise your eyebrows, awaiting his continuation. “I don’t think Suga meant it the way you took it.”

You nod as he bites the inside of his cheek, “I’ll always follow you, your majesty, and I believe you capable of making the right choices.”

There’s silence between you again, only the sounds of the mules’ hooves and breaths – it’s comfortable. Behind you, you can hear the movements and low talks of your other travel buddies. Azumane has clung to you since you came back and this is the first time you’re walking away from the make-shift seatings and he didn’t follow you.

“I think Suga simply wants you to survive, is all, your majesty.”

It’s your turn to bite the inside of the cheek at the statement.

Evening has arrived at your little camp and while everyone’s settled in a sort of comfortable gratitude about being alive and well, the tension between you and Sugawara is still pulled taut. Hinata is currently singing a few songs by the fire while Kageyama fills up the waterskins for tomorrow’s continued travels.

“Sugawara, a moment if you will.”

Sugawara puts the ladle back down into the pot of porridge with gracious speed compared to the damage of his injury before he straightens his back and replies to you, just as coldly as you had to him, “of course, your majesty. How may I assist you?”

Azumane and Sawamura can scarcely keep the smiles off of their faces at the display in front of them, entirely too childish and immature – not befitting of the crown and their advisor at all. Not to mention the way they’re all unceremoniously huddled under blankets around the fire, their ruler in the same, commoner survival gear as them. You look nothing like royalty after last night’s attack, so your speech mannerisms seem almost out of character. Sawamura’s just glad they brought a few extra uniforms with them since everything in your tent turned to ashes.

You pull out a map and beckon him closer. Sawamura doesn’t miss the way Sugawara rolls his eyes ever so slightly yet gets up from his crouched position to be by your side at your request. Your quarrel today is still heavy in the air and Azumane fears for the night shift the two of you are supposed to have at nightfall. He knows how you both can be stubborn and volatile and he’s not sure he’ll be able to sleep soundly.

Your talk remains civil as you go through the final stretch of your journey on the map, talking strategies. Sawamura altered the route earlier today to shake off possible attackers in case there’d been a mole in his scouting groups. He’d also sent one back to the keep requesting back up – he’s not sure they’ll get there in time, even if their travels won’t be on foot.

The night shift is entirely quiet. Sugawara’s stiff through the first few hours, waiting for you to yell at him, chide him, anything. But you stay silent, only occasionally getting up to fetch fresh water from the kettle by the fire. He thinks he’d rather want a scolding at this point.

You then gasp out loud and his fight or flight reacts immediately, his body tensing, ready to jump up at any given demand. He may be hurt, but he’s sure he’d still be able to defend you – at least until Sawamura woke up. He then looks to you, and your eyes are fixated on the sky above you. There’s a shimmer reflected in your eyes that makes his pose relax, the half-smile you’re adorning that makes him unclench his fists.

“There was a shooting star,” you explain and keep your gaze fixed up. Sugawara looks up at the immense horizon, the stars illuminating the pitch-black darkness. “Right there,” you point up even if the action is meaningless since your perspective is different from his, “right by Orion.”

That doesn’t help him, so he just stares up at the sky, “I think Cygnus is visible on the sky tonight as well.” You bite your underlip in concentration as your eyes flicker around and Sugawara finds himself looking more intently at you than at the heavens. A triumphant smile appears on your face, “yep, it’s right there north of the guiding star!” you say and Sugawara hangs his head low as he admits his biggest academic flaw to date, “I can’t navigate the stars.”

There’s silence from you and he finally gathers the courage to look up at you. The moment your eyes meet his apologetic ones, you can’t stop yourself from bursting out into a laugh. He seems genuinely sorry that he’s unable to locate a constellation and the blanket of tension between you dissipates immediately at his confession. You wipe a stray tear from your lash line as Sugawara pouts next to you, “it’s okay,” you manage to say between laughs as you start to quiet down again, “I can show you.”

You shuffle closer to Sugawara – closer than he thinks you’ve been before and he swallows thickly – and put your head by his shoulder. Sugawara holds his breath. You raise your arm to point, “do you see the bright star there? It’s Deneb, there’s three stars aligning with it horizontally,” you say and Sugawara thinks he knows where you’re talking about. You sigh before you continue, “the star directly next to Deneb, there’s stars that go vertically,” you point your finger a little higher slowly as you count, “one a little distance away and then,” you lick your lips subconsciously, “two, three and four.”

Sugawara’s getting cross-eyed by the closeness but wills his mind to focus entirely on your hand and the stars above. He sees the pattern you’re mentioning, “Cygnus means swan, right?” he asks and you nod. In nodding, your head touches his shoulder – you decide to lean into that with a sigh, “yeah, it’s the swan constellation. It means summer’s coming.”

Sugawara dares not move, lest you pull back from him. Only once has he felt your weight like this on him, and he never imagined himself lucky enough to experience it twice. He can feel your body temperature mingle with his own and when he exhales slowly, he can actually see his breath. He notices your slight shiver. It’s unseasonably cold for this time of year, “it’s the clear skies. There’s nothing to tie down the heat.” you say while stifling a yawn.

Did Sugawara speak out loud? He simply nods, unable to form the proper words he wants to articulate. All these years reading books and learning about the human mind and he can’t even hold a conversation with you. He wants to lean onto you as well, but he doesn’t.

You climb out of the tent bright and early, stretching your limbs. You enjoy sleeping in but admittedly sleeping next to three grown and snoring men made it easier to get up with the sun. Azumane greets you from the fireplace and hands you a cup of tea as you settle down.

Today, Hinata is leaving ahead of you to see if he can either gain information or trust. He’s from the duchy – even if he grew up on the borders of it, on the other side of the mountain, it might help that a local arrives. He’s preparing a packing mule for traveling together with Sawamura, trying to make it appear that he’s been traveling alone. You’re lucky he didn’t get visibly hurt during the assault.

When he’s packed and ready to leave, you approach him, “thank you, Hinata, for doing this,” you say with a gentle smile that makes Hinata tense up in excitement from your acknowledgement. He then salutes you, “of course, your majesty! I shall do my utmost to help.”

He sounds knightly and ready, if it weren’t for the rumbling of his stomach a few short moments after his declaration. He curls in on himself with an apology dripping from his mouth. You notice the signs in him as the signs you had back when you became Crown-in-Waiting. You bend down to lock eyes with him, “you’re going to do great, no matter the outcome.” You hope you give a sufficient enough smile as you rest a hand on his shoulder, “we’ll arrive after nightfall as well, so it won’t be long before we’re united again, okay?”

He inhales slowly, holds it, and while straightening his back, exhales slowly again. He seems more determined as he gives you a big smile, “thank you, your majesty.” he says as he gets ready to leave you.

After Hinata’s left, you’re all by the campfire, eating a small provisional breakfast. Kageyama’s trying to sleep a few hours before you leave after having the final part of the night shift. Sawamura scratches at his ever-growing beard and you smile, “it’s really grown out these days, huh.” You say and he laughs. One of those deep ones that rumbles from his stomach, “I admit I have forgotten to pack a proper looking glass and blade.”

You smile and take a bite out from the small bowl on your lap, “it suits you. Beards are very handsome.”

Next to you, Sugawara chokes on a piece of bread. With a worried look you turn to him, leaning in to see if he’s alright. You pat his back and he raises an arm, “I’m okay, your majesty,” he manages to wheeze out and you smile, “you have to be careful.”

Sugawara nods as he wipes off his mouth with his sleeve. He freezes when he feels the pad of your fingers against his cheek, “you haven’t grown out much hair,” you absentmindedly state, eyes locked on his lips, the valley of his cupids bow as you feel the softness of his skin. You’re pulled out of your daze by the roaring laughter around you. You look to Sawamura and Azumane who’s both wheezing out, Sawamura hitting his thigh too in order to control his laughter. Sugawara pouts and scolds them, “shut up you two!” he tries, but they hardly listen.

You laugh at the antics in front of you, “did I say something amiss?” you ask and Azumane heaves in a breath, “Suga’s never been able to grow a beard, it’s his insecurity, your majesty.”

“Hey!” Sugawara yells and your eyes trace back to him, he’s pointing at Azumane with his butter knife, “stop telling people about that!” he side-eyes you for a second and then, in a frustrated whisper adds, “especially them!” as if you wouldn’t be able to hear him.

Sawamura laughs, “when we were little, Suga drew a picture of us grown up, and he had this big beard on the drawing – so you can imagine his disappointment,” he jokes and you laugh. Sugawara mumbles out unintelligible yet clearly annoyed words.

“Yeah, in front of the castle, right?” Sawamura asks and Azumane confirms, “yeah, he drew it shortly before I left as my parting gift. I still have it in my chambers.”

You look around at the three men in front of you with slight confusion, “you grew up together?”

They all return your confused look, staring at you as if you’d just grown three heads and not simply asked an innocent question. Azumane smiles, “did I fail to mention so, your majesty? We’re all from the same hometown.”

You nod as you piece together the childhood stories you’ve gotten before from both Azumane and Sugawara. Like a painting receiving it’s finer lines, you start to visualize who was with them in the stories they’ve told. You raise a hand to your mouth as you bark out a laugh, “I didn’t realize! But I can see how it makes sense…”

You sigh, “…must be nice, to stay so close after so many years.”

They all nod, solemnly, and the rest of the breakfast is finished in silence. It’s comfortable, but there’s a fog around you that Sugawara can’t seem to see through. He’s not sure how to give you any reassuring words.

                                                          ///    

When you arrive at the outskirts of town, there’s quiet. You can see the light from the houses littering the scenery and nothing seems amiss. There’re still a few miles to the center of the town, so you stretch your arms over your head as you straighten your back. Sawamura is by your side instantly, “do you need a break, your majesty?” he asks and you smile at him as you shake your head, “I’m fine, Sawamura. Thank you, though.”

Sugawara and Kageyama are walking behind with the remaining mule and Azumane’s walking a few steps ahead. Sawamura paces his walking to yours, and a comfortable silence settles over you as you take in your surroundings.

You heave in a breath to gather courage and clench your fists at your sides, then you turn to Sawamura, “ho- “your voice is higher pitched than you’d like, so you steel yourself again, “how was Sugawara as a child?”

Sawamura looks at you, startled to begin with but loosens up with a sort of fatherly smile. He looks up at the sky as you continue walking side by side, “Suga? He’s not much different now, I’d say. He’s mischievous when he wants to be, but other than that he’s got a stout heart – he doesn’t sway easily.”

You nod, playing with your fingers to alleviate your own nervousness. Sawamura sighs, “he’s always there for the people he cares about. He picked a fight with some older guys when we were kids, because they picked on his brother.” Sawamura chuckles at the memory.

“He’s a romantic, too.” Sawamura adds and it sounds much like an afterthought to you, but if Sugawara had heard him say those words to you, he’d scolded him. You feel your pulse quicken from something other than the brisk pace you’re walking as you hurry to avert your eyes to the ground. You’re about to say something when you’re abruptly interrupted, “psst!”

You all turn your heads to the hedge you’re walking next to, Sawamura already holding onto the handle of his sword, ready to fight if necessary. It’s an elderly lady in a cloak looking directly at you. She’s so small that her head is barely above the hedge’s edge. “Who walks there?” Sawamura demands, all loud and imposing but she hurries to hush him, “quiet! Come in quickly, before everyone knows you’ve arrived.”

She motions for you all to come in through the gates to the modest house. Inside, there’s lights in one of the rooms and you can see someone else walking around.

“Daichi.” Sugawara says from behind you, his voice level and even. You can hear the coldness to it, his message clear that he does not trust this lady. You smile gently at her as she tries to make you hurry, “if they spot you there’ll be trouble, so please, your majesty.”

That makes all of you tense up and Sawamura hurries to drag out his sword, pointing it towards her. He asks you to stand back but you walk closer to the gate, and lower Sawamura’s sword with your hand as you pass him, “I believe we can trust her.”

You’re not sure why. You have no recollection of meeting this woman, but you feel safe when you lock eyes with her. She bows slightly and opens the gates for you, “the mule can grass behind the house, just hurry.”

When you’re inside, you’re seated by a table. Sawamura and Sugawara’s standing by the entrance with their arms crossed, not happy with your decision to come inside and they’re not afraid to make it known. Azumane’s sitting with you, profusely apologizing for your company’s manners. You’re all waiting in awkward silence for Kageyama to walk in through the door after securing the mule to a post.

There’s another woman humming as she’s preparing a kettle of water. You can’t determine her age, but she isn’t much younger than the other one. You faintly recognize the melody she’s humming, but you cannot place it. When you finally ask her where the melody is from, she chuckles as she answers you, “it’s my own. I sang it for my son when he was just a babe.” She hands you a steaming hot cup of tea and you bow to her as you hurry to thank her – both for the cup of tea but certainly also for the hospitality – even if the circumstances seem dubious to your traveling company.

The door from the gardens open and Kageyama treads in with the elderly lady in hand, helping her up the heightened steps. “Oh, your majesty, I’m so delighted you’ve been tended to,” the elderly lady exclaims happily, excusing herself as she walks past Sawamura and Sugawara, who both declined any refreshments.

“I believe an introduction’s in order.” She says nonchalantly, seating herself next to you, “I’m Takeda Airi,” she bows to you unceremoniously before she grabs one of the pastries from the center of the table. Both you and Sugawara perk up and take a look at each other, recognizing the name immediately.

She lets out a shrill laugh, “you two can’t be fooled, I take it.” She notices, and you smile sheepishly, “am I wrong to assume Takeda Ittetsu is a family member of yours?” you ask, putting down your cup on the table. Airi hands you a pastry without asking if you wanted any, and the other woman scolds her, “mother! Don’t force feed the crown!”

She waves her off, “Ittetsu told me that the crown loves sweet things. Which is why I had you baking!”

You can’t help but laugh at the absurdity of the situation. You’d never known your tutoring scribe’s family history or ever imagined yourself in his family’s home. Airi seems special and almost familiar to you, now that you can take a better look at her. Her nose is rounded and flat, while her eyes are still big and all-seeing. When she catches you staring, you straighten your back. She smiles knowingly, “you’ve realized we’ve met before.” She states, and Sugawara walks over to stand by your side. You’re not sure of his intentions.

You’re about to ask her to make sense of this feeling in you when she claps her hands together, “we don’t have time for the past! Your majesty, you must leave.”

“Leave?” you exclaim, not able to hold back a grimace. She nods, “this duchy does not see you in a very good light. Your very life is in danger just by being here.”

Your throat feels dry but your mouth waters in anxiety. You try to gulp but feel unable to. Sugawara puts a hand on your shoulder, “with all due respect, we came to figure out why.”

Airi nods before giving Sugawara a grim look, “you have been doing a poor job, advisor. Letting your crown come so far into a lion’s den.” Everyone tenses, Sawamura and Kageyama take another battle stance at her comment. She then lets out another shrill laugh, “oh I don’t mean me, obviously! The town! The duchy!” she raises her arms to further her point, “the duke is not to be trusted.”

The other woman sighs, “mother, you’re confusing them,” she then turns to you all with a warm smile, “I’m Hina. Ittetsu’s mother.”

You take a bite of the pastry shoved in your hands earlier. She then sighs and look out the window, clenching her fists by her chest, “Duke Takashi killed your father.”

The air gets hard to breathe. It’s like there isn’t any air in the air you were breathing, your throat feeling tight; mouth numb. The ringing in your ears become distinctly louder and your blood feels heavy, rushing through you. In a far corner of your sense of self, you feel the hand on your shoulder tighten. You think the pastry in your hand might’ve fallen to the ground. The sweet aftertaste of cinnamon lingers on your tastebuds, suffocating you.

You register the raised voices around you, but none of the words gets processed. Your eyes are open but they’re looking inwards. There’s a burning wire of fire in your heart, ablaze and uncontrollable. You think you hear your father’s voice somewhere, repeating your name. As the voice gets clearer and clearer, the sound of your name gets more and more distorted.

You heave in a desperate breath as you’re pulled back to reality. Airi’s hand is touching yours, her ring cold on your skin. You recognize it immediately, the Black wings of the Crow crafted into a ring instead of a pin. You look at her with questioning eyes and she smiles gently, “one thing at a time, my dearest. Now, take a deep breath for me.”

She takes deep breaths to instruct you and you seem to follow them with ease. Sugawara tries to relax next to you, but he can’t deny the bizarreness of this entire situation. He holds his breath until yours is back under control.

Hina asks Sawamura and Kageyama to sit down as well as she starts explaining. Duke Takashi came into his dukedom shortly before the drought, known locally as the power-hungry, youngest son of the Takashi family. His older brother tragically died in a housefire shortly before ascending his duty and therefor Takashi stood to inherit it all.

There was a big change of staff when he entered his role, new rules bestowed upon the duchy.

“After the drought, he held an assembly to tell us of the kingdom’s decision of abandonment.”

Sugawara raises an eyebrow. No such decision was ever made – or even discussed. Hina smiles patiently, “you all looked confused. See, Duke Takashi is good at many things. Manipulating and isolating his duchy is undoubtedly his strongest suit.”

Airi scoffs and interrupts, “that snake.”

Hina nods, agreeing with her mother, “the treaty with Fukurodani Empire was still new at the time and he used it to his advantage. Made us believe that the crown was trying to give us up, abandon us.”

You suck in your teeth, fear gripping at your heart as you try to steady the beating. Hina continues, “your father did a lot of good things for the duchy during the crisis. He even came here, in this very kitchen, with food to help sustain us – and a lot of other homes.”

Airi sighs, “but time does as time does best. If it is not taken care of, it forgets. It leaves behind knowledge.”

“But what does that have to do with Duke Takashi?” Sugawara asks, though he thinks he might’ve pieced it together by now. He doesn’t like where it’s going.

Airi’s about to open her mouth and speak more when Hina hisses, “they’re here.”

You whip your head to the window and through the darkness of the outside, you make out a few torches and movement. More detailed it won’t become, so long as there’s light in the house.

“Hide, upstairs!” Airi says as she pulls you up from your chair with surprising strength. Sugawara grabs your hand and leads you first towards the stairs he noticed at the back of the hallway when they arrived. He hears the others are right behind the two of you.

You take a look back and see Airi smile gently at you, tapping her ring finger with her other hand. You know it means her allegiance lies with you, though fear still has a wholesome grip around your throat. You’re not sure what’s going to happen, but you know nothing must happen to her.

You’re huddled in the back with Azumane and Sugawara hovering over you, arms around you protectively, as Sawamura and Kageyama stand ready with weapons in case anyone will show up.

You hear the muffled noise of knocking on the door and Airi tiredly yelling she’s on her way when the knocking becomes more aggressive. You strain your eyes to listen to the words spoken but can only make out the hostility of the voice speaking, not the words. The voices raise and you hear something being thrown, which makes your body react before you can really think your actions through.

You jump up from your bent position, passing Sawamura and Kageyama before they can even react to your actions, jumping – and almost falling – down the stairs, a determined glare in your eyes. You see Airi on the floor next to the stool she’d been pushed towards and Hina crouched by her, holding up her head. Airi looks at you and yells out a “no!” but you only have eyes for the man who still has his arm raised from the push.

Duke Takashi.

When he sees you, a sinister grin appears on his face. He pulls back his arm and readjusts his sleeve, as if the wrinkles he’d gotten from his violence was more revolting than the action itself.

“Oh, your majesty, what brings you here? What a pleasant surprise.”

You scoff, “surprise?”

You hear the others hurry down the stairs to you but before they can round the corner, Takashi’s already jumped into action, pulling your back close to him with a knife to your throat. Involuntarily, you let out a whine from the impact as you try to scratch at his arms, kick his legs, anything.

But he doesn’t budge. He merely kicks at Airi as if your struggle was a daytime breeze.

“Get Airi and Hina away from here!” you choke out between labored breaths, and Sawamura orders Kageyama help them get up and behind them.

“Let them go, Duke Takashi and you shan’t be punished.”

Takashi laughs again as he starts walking backwards and out of the house with you in tow, “oh I don’t believe that at all, you simple knights have no honor left.”

Outside, a mob has gathered. It’s the people of the town, and they’re all making way for Takashi to hold you in the center, demanding their attention.

“Everyone! We have them in our grasp!” he starts, toying with the knife close to your throat, laughing triumphantly.

“Our plans had setbacks, sure, but now we can reclaim the full prize. There is simply no heir to take the throne and what will happen when they tragically pass due to a group of bandits? I, Duke Takashi, will of course lend my aid to the kingdom.”

Sugawara clenches his fists, “there’ll be no place for you on the throne!” he yells, and one of Takashi’s guardsmen takes a hold of him. “Let me go!” he yells, but it’s futile. His shoulder’s acting up and the fatigue from the other bruises that he’d hidden well from you, is catching up to him. He’s powerless. He sends Sawamura a pleading look, but his look is steeled entirely on you, sword raised as he tries to figure out what to do. How to get you back safe.

“Won’t there? You’re the advisor, Sugawara, so tell me. What happens if there’s no one to ascend the throne? Hm? That’s right, the dukes are put to a vote to become stewards of the kingdom.”

“As if they’d vote for you!” Sugawara spits back and the guard tightens his grip on Sugawara’s arms, making him kneel. You whine at seeing him being hurt.

“Oh, so you think I’ve been snoozing the past five or so years? You haven’t noticed the good relations I’ve been making with the other duchies? The aid I’ve provided them?”

Sugawara’s eyes widen. The lowered tax – Sugawara had assumed that Takashi had kept the money to himself instead of giving it to his duchy, that he’d hoarded wealth for his own gain – but the plot had been much bigger than Sugawara had caught on to. This was more than just stealing money from his own duchy.

It’s a coup d’état.

A carefully planned one at that.

You scratch at his arms and he groans, “stop moving, your majesty, I’ll finish this soon enough.” He says your title mockingly. You hear the sound of crows cawing somewhere in the distance.

“You stole your people’s money!” you manage to yell out as you kick his knee. Takashi yells out as he hits your head with the blunt end of the blade, making you disoriented.

The guard holding Sugawara tightly suddenly loosens his grip – not enough to be visible to anyone else, but certainly felt by Sugawara. Sugawara notices some of the guards looking around at each other, their angry and victorious faces going pale, confused, questioning.

Sugawara takes his chances, “you stole the much-needed money from a hurt duchy and redistributed it to other well-functioning duchies, didn’t you? The crown lowered the taxes to help the people here, but you didn’t lower their payments!”

More confusion, more questions.

Sawamura smiles confidently but with reprehension still as he quietly says, “these people are helping you on false pretenses, aren’t they? Do they know the truth?”

Takashi starts backing away more, tightening his grip on your throat. You try to resist, but he’s strong – and the knife is lodged so close, that you can feel the sting of the blade. Your head pounds, making your vision blurry. You feel blood tickle down your brow. You have to trust your men.

You detect panic in his voice as he frantically starts explaining to his men how they’d get in on his success, too. How he’d share the riches of the kingdom with them. One yells back, “there was riches! But you took them!”

“My daughter passed away because you said we couldn’t afford to pay the local doctor to stay in town!” another yells, anguished.

Words like worthy sacrifice, small evils needed and desperate attempts to convince them of his righteousness is thrown around, but he’s frantically grasping at straws now that he’s been exposed.

He pushes the blade enough to break skin. Sugawara calls your name again and you almost smile. You must be delirious from the pain because somehow you feel happy that he called your name again. You never thought you’d hear it again, much less this soon. He calls it with a hoarser voice and as the guard lets go of him, you can see he intends to run to you. Sawamura stops him with an arm and the yelling is now directed at him instead.

Sugawara can’t see what you can from your perspective on the other side of the hedge, and you know Sawamura’s taking a gamble based on his hearing only.

Takashi laughs manically, hysterically, shrill in your ear as he presses the knife, getting ready to slice. You try to mouth ‘it’s okay’ to Sugawara but it seems to make his anger rise even more.

Takashi raises the knife again and lifts it high to get ready to end your life. A mocking salute is heard from him.

And that’s when you hear the sound of an arrow pass cleanly by your head.

The sound and feel of blood gushing out will probably be forever ingrained in your memory. You look to the side to see one of Sawamura’s guards with a bow. Behind him is one with a shield and a sword, together with Hinata. You smile at them before your legs give in underneath you.

You expect to hit the ground, given that Takashi’s body is pulling you down with him.

Sugawara scrapes his knees as he tries to run to you so fast that he stumbles. The last few steps are crawled but he reaches you before your upper body falls further down, grabbing a hold of your shoulders.

Panicked, one-syllable words are thrown at you, his behavior mirroring yours when he was stabbed. You almost laugh. His hands search your face and wipes your tears and drags stray hairs away from your face. You’re about to open your mouth and make a mother hen joke when his lips are colliding onto yours.

You’re rigid at first before you relax your mouth and mold your lips to fit his. Right as you’re starting to enjoy the feeling, he pulls away, apologies thick on his tongue, panic laced in his voice. He hasn’t gotten very far away from you before you lean forward to kiss him back.

You’re rougher, and your teeth clash, the kiss much more undignified than when he initiated it, but it’s no less perfect to you. When he pulls away, slower this time, you let him, searching his eyes. He still looks terrified and his breathing is still panicked, “I thought I’d lost you.” he admits. You smile and kiss him again, this time short and sweet, “oh, you won’t get rid of me that easily.”

Behind you, you hear the bellowing laugh of the guard who shot the arrow. You think his name might be Nishinoya. Sawamura walks up to them – he puts a hand on your shoulder on the way and smiles at you.

“Nishinoya.” Sawamura then says gratefully, and you make a mental note of giving that man a title as well. Nishinoya yells, “I told you guys I’d always have your back as the Guardian Deity!” you hear Hinata’s excitement too as you laugh and rest your head on Sugawara’s shoulder. Then, a stray tear slips past your defenses, “is it over?” you croak out, almost too afraid to ask. Sugawara laughs airily, like he can’t believe it either, but he rests his head on yours, “yes, your majesty.”

You’re glad to have found the truth, relieved that you can now let your father go knowing what has happened. The steps in front of you are also now clear, like he’s paved them for you before he left.

You smile into Sugawara’s shoulder and close your eyes. It’ll be okay.

My cat’s final contribution. He thanks you for reading his words and for your kind feedback in earlier chapters. He knows his words are superior to mine and CLEARLY is what’s made you all come back to this work:

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[mayamistake]

An original graphic novel based on rock music legend Pete Townshends 1970 screenplay of the same name, which inspired The Whos 1971 globally bestselling and universally beloved album, Who’s Next. Set in a dystopian future where music has been outlawed, LIFE HOUSE follows a small band of rebels who stage an underground concert in an effort to undermine a tyrannical leader…and free Britain and all of humanity. This graphic novelization is co-written by Doom Patrols JAMES HARVEY and Spider-Man Noirs DAVID HINE, with art by both HARVEY and Australian visual artist MAX PRENTIS, lettering by MICAH MYERS, and inks by Eisner Award-winning artist MICK GRAY. It is edited by the former Dark Horse editor, HANNAH MEANS-SHANNON, and features a massive vinyl LP format (12.25 x 12.25). This is a must-have for any serious music collectors, rock fans, and pop culture aficionados! Originally envisioned as a sci-fi rock epic to follow up The Whos chart-topping rock opera Tommy, and put aside 50 years ago—in favor of Who’s Next songs like “Baba O’Riley,” “Won’t Get Fooled Again,” and “Behind Blue Eyes”—LIFE HOUSE will finally take center stage.Also available in a SLIPCASE EDITION, featuring a vegan leather-bound slipcase! 2023

[moth-in-the-moon]

Howdy I was that first ask (sorry I'd rather stay anon, bad xmen fandom experiences taught me to keep my opinions to myself or people will go after you personally). I'm only answering now cuz it doesn't look like we got the same timezones : I found your blog after looking up Margali related stuff (I needed this) and saw the reblog with the tag about "messy timeline". I like putting together timeline charts for my favs so I pulled out my Nightcrawler related one (slightly messy from following Si Spurrier's runs) and decided to give a shot to X-Men Blue. Big mistake. I should have listened to you. My 10 years in the making timeline chart is now only good for the dumpster and I'm done with Si.

I sent my ask to you because everyone is very hush hush about these kinds of complains and I just wanted you to know you weren't alone.

Okay so, I don't hate the Golden Child on her own, it's... How she came to be was unnecessary weird (genetically Kurt is as much her grandpa as he is her dad, wtf). What a weird road to go down instead of having her be like Cardinal. You know the chimera engineered from Nightcrawler's DNA +2 mutants that's straight up Azazel with red hair and eyes ? From PoX ? (Not sure if the editors remember him at all)

Funny stuff about Azazel btw, the demon thing was a retcon on his mutant status done after Austen left (he's back to being a mutant since 2019), Azazel keeps close contact with other Winding Way witches than Margali and Nightcrawler's ectrodactyly might have come from him too because he has been shown in a few comics (when doing his behind the scenes scheming with no one else around) to have that at least for his hands and uses his shapeshifting to hide it... For reasons.

I personally never cared about the Baron because he was a nothing character ? Man didn't even have a first name or canon appearance until TAS and his lastname's a plothole. This gets to the point where having him and Azazel turn out to be the same person, like a secret identity to the latter dude, would actually be an improvement and funny idea.

You're right, that "beloved darling child" is a straight up joke when looking at Mystique and Destiny's actions : They adopted and raised Rogue in 616 since she was a CHILD, raised both her and Kurt together in the "Children in the attic" what-if (Scott Lobdell but Mystique didnt throw Nightcrawler into a waterfall to save herself. Still calls Rogue the child she "always wanted" even then) and straight up let Nightcrawler die saving Hope when they were ready to sacrifice her as a baby to save Rogue (Kurt's death was avoidable and Mystique didn't know he'd be back to life like ever).

Mystique also raised Nightcrawler from birth in Age of Apocalypse where everything is Hell and he gets killed (Apocalypse attacks long after he was born so it's the same chain of events until that) and kept close contact and looked after Destiny's many human children, mutant grandchildren and grand-grandchildren throughout the years in 616... To the point of killing Graydon Creed, her biological son which she kept close watch on until his teens, to protect them. Kurt turns out to have been neglected more by her than Graydon at this point following this one shot.

The change made here on the "definite origin story" complicates and contradict stuff for no reason. It also adds another layer of unanswered questions which goes against the point of a definite story

"Why would Mystique and Destiny plan on having this kid, finally have him then straight up abandon him because of a 'sudden vision' when one of them is a precog who checks the future 24/7 to be sure everything goes perfectly fine but apparently kept things going when she saw 0 futures with that baby in it post due-date and never even once wrote about said baby in her future diaries for Mystique to do stuff for him in the future when she was gone (contrary to Rogue the child they adopted) ?" Si Spurrier doesn't care to think about important elements like that and just keeping throwing stuff on a wall to see what sticks

"Why didn't they rescue Nightcrawler before Xavier at any point and recruit him/secretly raise him with Rogue ?" Nightcrawler's first appearance was him literally running away from a mob (canonically not his first) before being saved by Xavier, one of the 3 people Mystique and Destiny were going to assassinate in their first appearance (Days of Future Past) which directly led to Nightcrawler being one of the first (avoidable) mutant casualties of that timeline. So even without years of baggage, these two didn't care about Kurt within their first X-Men issue with him. But sure the answer to this is probably the future vision excuse again I bet...

Well tell that to Margali Szardos, the circus fortune teller who managed to properly raise Kurt and protect him with half the power, wealth, means, knowledge and people. Oh wait we can't cuz she ded (Weird coincidence that the same writer behind this story which tries to make Mystique and Destiny look like the best moms for Nightcrawler turned Kurt's actual good mom into the complete opposite of who she was then unceremoniously killed her...)

Mystique has also spent her time using her knowledge of his origins as way to get him to do stuff for her then lied about them over and over again (this story makes it the third time she lied). Something she never hesitated or regretted doing

Then you have... Krakoa. So much to say. Most recent example ? Mystique and Destiny abandoned Kurt (for the 2nd time now) in the Sins of Sinister timeline when they left the island before he got switched with his sinister clone and Margali did her full corruption thing. They straight up ignored him when he grew horns in present time from beginning to end. He gets mind-controlled, murders people and has to leave to an Orchis filled Earth without keeping in touch with anyone, no reaction whatsoever from them

This reveal just turned Mystique and Destiny from bad to god awful parents in general (it looks like they never cared because they never raised him themselves) and yet the story pretends otherwise

One, before I get into anything, BIIIG ask. I've never had an ask that big. Two, Before I get into anything, Cardinal my beloved, my son, my beautiful beautiful boy, he and god baby should both be canon and like. weird universeally/timeline displaces siblings. A thing about Cardinal that I personally think is an interesting concept is how, being part Rachel (so a descendant of Jean) would make him probably be on the Phoenixes list of favourite hosts, which I think could be interesting with his anti-violence genes (<- whatever the fuck that was). Also they should remember him, since they made Rasputin 4 canon (I have my complaints about her genetic make up too, considering shes part. illyana and piotr.) Again, long thoughts under the read more

Yeah, again I completely agree on the neglect paart. The reveal managed to make Destiny and Mystique even more horrible parents, but it's trying to paint them as loving their son, which, is kinda nonsensical with past context. As I said, this retcon at this point in time is bad for the characters BECAUSE of the years of plot from the past. From mystique caring for other children to how they both act towards Kurt throughout things like Krakoa, it doesnt really add up. Plus, what would be the reason for them to not tell him sooner? Did destiny specifically see Kurt get a sick ass magic sword and go "this is incredibly important to the timeline" and thats why they stayed quiet? Having them make destiny and raven be heartbroken about the baby having to go and having the description literally be like "neither of us ever had any kids because of love until we decited to have you" It's a whiplash that could technically work if built up right, but this wasn't built up. Because I do think this could've worked with better set up, but its too late for that.

And yeah no, there have been what-ifs of mystique "successfully" raising Kurt, so it just makes the vision a weirdly cruel plotpoint. Plus that means Destiny is now canonically at fault for all that happened to Kurt, because she knew and actively set it in motion through this retcon. Which. is a wild thing to accidentally do.

Though I do like the moment where Mystique is like "I wished for a daughter", that feels fitting to her and kurts relationship.

Also this does make Kurt doing his "make 'em talk by letting them freefall under the threat of letting them splat" to Destiny funnier. You go boy, threaten matricide!

And man, yeah, Margali wasn't a perfect mom, but we have many scenes of her being a good mom or at least trying to be (specifically for kurt). Shout out to her calling Kurt her specialest boy that one time, she loved her baby. We need a Margali comic about her and her powers honestly, she's canonically one of the strongest sorcerers ever, bound by the moody nature of a living dimension, it would be so interesting to see how the way actually effects her and if she's like, bound to certain actions by the way, lest it destroys her or something. She is the sorcerer supreme of it iirc so there is a very specific connection here, especially since the wandering way is alive. With Kurt having the magic sword now too, it would be interesting for margali to come back (cause lets be real, she isnt gonna stay dead (<- threat. by me. at the comics.) and maybe teach him magic or how to work with magic. Let them actually work out the cracks in their relationship, show that they both do love eachother, but time and everything that has come up just kept tearing at them and margalis laissez-faire nature and following of the winding way didnt really help.

also man, krakoa was a good fun idea, i hate that they killed her, you couldve done alot of good with krakoa, the writers were just on their "uuuuh. shit we cant have mutants be happy" path again