#and it feels like nothing will ever change
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jungwnies · 3 days ago
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wreckage - charles leclerc
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୨ৎ : pairing : charles leclerc x wife!reader ୨ৎ : synopsis : after a heated argument with charles, you watch in horror as his car crashes during a race
୨ৎ : genre : angst ୨ৎ : tws : car accident/injury, arguments/conflict, anxiety/panic, trauma, medical trauma. ୨ৎ : wc : 1318
part one | part two | part three | part four
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They say life can change in the blink of an eye. One second, everything feels steady, solid, like the ground beneath your feet couldn’t possibly give way. And then it does. Maybe that’s the irony of it all—you never see it coming. Not really. You think you’re prepared, think you’ve braced yourself, but you’re never quite ready for the moment it all falls apart.
You fought this morning. Not just a little spat about something trivial—no, this was one of those fights that echoed louder than it should have. The kind that lingered, thick in the air, leaving a bitter taste in your mouth even hours later.
It wasn’t about anything catastrophic, either, but somehow, with Charles, the small things had a way of snowballing. His schedule. Your schedule. The time you didn’t have together. The things he didn’t say and the things you did.
“I’m trying, okay? You think it’s easy for me?” he’d snapped, his accent sharpening the edges of his words. “You know what this life is like.”
“Yeah, Charles, I do. But I also know you don’t get to use it as an excuse every single time something gets hard. I’m here, too, and I’m trying to make this work just as much as you are.”
His jaw had tightened, his gaze flickering to the ground before meeting yours again. “Sometimes it feels like no matter what I do, it’s never enough for you.”
You’d felt the sting of those words, like a slap across the face. But you weren’t one to back down, not even when the weight of his frustration pressed heavy on your chest.
“You don’t get to say that to me, not when I’m the one waiting, worrying, wondering if this is ever going to feel… stable. Do you know how hard it is to love someone who’s never really here?”
The silence that followed was deafening, his features a mix of hurt and anger, like he didn’t know which to lean into more. And then he’d said it.
“Maybe it’s hard because you don’t trust me enough to believe that I’m doing my best.”
You hadn’t answered, and maybe that was the problem. The fight ended there, not because either of you wanted it to but because there was no time to fix it. Not when he had a race to prepare for, and you had to pretend like none of this was tearing you apart from the inside out.
When you arrived at the paddock, it felt impossible to mask the weight of the argument. You greeted a few people with forced smiles, but you could see some of them watching you a little too closely. It didn’t help that Charles seemed just as tense, his jaw set and his usual ease nowhere to be found.
Carlos was the first to pull you aside, his brown eyes narrowing slightly as he leaned closer. “¿Qué pasa, eh? You look like someone stole your churros, and Charles… well, he looks worse. What happened?”
“Nothing,” you said quickly, shaking your head. “It’s fine.”
Carlos raised an eyebrow, clearly not buying it. “Amiga, por favor. I know you, and I know him. Whatever this is, it’s not nothing.”
You sighed, glancing over your shoulder where Charles was talking to his engineers. “We just… had a fight this morning. It’s not a big deal.”
Carlos gave you a skeptical look. “Not a big deal? You’re both walking around like someone cancelled Christmas. If you’re not okay, neither is he. You should talk to him before the race.”
You hesitated, the memory of this morning’s argument still fresh in your mind. “I don’t want to distract him. He needs to focus.”
Carlos clicked his tongue, shaking his head with a small smile. “Tch. If you think he’s focusing now, you’re wrong. You being upset is a bigger distraction than anything else. Go.”
Reluctantly, you nodded and made your way toward Charles. He was still in deep conversation with one of his engineers, but when he saw you approaching, his expression softened—just slightly.
“Hey,” you said quietly, folding your arms across your chest.
“Hey,” he replied, his voice lower than usual. There was a pause, the tension between you lingering like a storm cloud.
“Good luck out there,” you finally said, your voice steadier than you felt. “I mean it. Be safe.”
Charles studied you for a moment, his green eyes searching yours. Then he nodded. “And… I’m sorry. For earlier.”
You opened your mouth to respond, but before you could, someone called for him, signaling it was time to get ready. He gave you one last look, then turned and walked away, leaving you standing there with words unsaid.
The race began, and for a while, the roar of engines and the blur of cars distracted you. Charles was in good form, holding his position, making clean overtakes. You found yourself exhaling with relief every time his car flashed across the screen.
But then it happened.
It was almost too fast to comprehend. One moment, Charles was rounding a corner, perfectly in control. The next, there was smoke, debris, and the sickening crunch of metal against metal.
Your heart stopped.
The commentators’ voices rose in panic, their words a jumbled mess that barely registered in your mind. “Oh no, that’s Leclerc… that’s a big one.”
Everything else faded—the noise of the crowd, the hum of your thoughts—until all that remained was the image of his car, mangled and still.
“Red flag,” one of them said, and that’s when it hit you. They’d stopped the race. It was bad.
Your hands trembled as you gripped the edge of the table, your breath coming in shallow, uneven gasps. This wasn’t happening. It couldn’t be happening.
The minutes crawled by like hours, every second another layer of dread settling in your chest. You kept your eyes glued to the screen, desperate for any sign, any update, anything to tell you he was okay.
When they finally cut to the scene, you saw the medics surrounding his car, moving quickly but carefully.
“He’s conscious,” one of the commentators said, and you felt a rush of air leave your lungs, but it wasn’t enough. Not until you saw him. Not until you heard him.
You thought back to the fight, to the last thing he said to you, and it made you sick to your stomach. This couldn’t be the last memory you had of him, the last words you exchanged. It couldn’t.
You were already reaching for your phone, dialing his team, someone, anyone who could give you more than the vague reassurance of the broadcast.
“Please,” you whispered, the word barely audible over the pounding of your heart. “Please let him be okay.”
It’s strange, how quickly everything can unravel. You think you’ve got it all figured out, that the argument was just another bump in the road. But in the back of your mind, there’s always that voice whispering, telling you that things might never be the same.
And now, with every second that ticks by, your thoughts spiral, faster and faster, until you can’t breathe. What if this is it? What if those were the last words you ever said to him?
You close your eyes, trying to steady yourself, but all you can see is that image of his car, broken and still. Your pulse races. You told him you loved him today, but did he really hear you? Was he ever truly certain, or was that last moment of tension, the words left unsaid, enough to make him doubt everything?
You hate this. You hate the fear gnawing at you. You hate that you're sitting here, helpless, as he’s out there fighting for his life. That feeling of powerlessness—it’s unbearable.
Please, you think again, clutching the phone like it’s the only thing tethering you to reality. Please, don’t let this be the end.
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rizzanon · 2 days ago
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05 | UNTOUCHED MEMORIES
m.list | prev | next
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Things between you and Damian weren’t perfect, but they were better. Slightly better.
Since that day, the tension that used to hang heavy between you had softened, just a little. He no longer avoided you like the plague, nor did he try to dismiss you every chance he got. Sure, there were still moments where you clashed—Damian was Damian, after all—but now, it didn’t feel like an outright war. It was more… playful. Almost.
He still had his sharp remarks, but they didn’t cut as deep anymore. And you? You’d give them right back, though with less heat than before. It was oddly satisfying to watch him bristle, his retorts coming slower and more thoughtful, like he was beginning to actually enjoy the verbal sparring. Though he definitely wouldn’t admit that.
One day, you decided to test the waters further.
You found Damian in the sitting room, a book in his hands and Titus curled up at his feet. He didn’t look up as you approached, though you knew he’d already noticed you.
“Hey, Damian,” you said, holding the plate out in front of you.
He finally looked up, one eyebrow raised. “What is it now?”
You rolled your eyes. “Relax. I made these with Alfred. Thought you might want to try them.”
He eyed the plate suspiciously, like it might explode if he touched it. “Why?”
“Why what?”
“Why are you offering me one?” he asked, his voice carefully neutral. “What’s your angle?”
You huffed, crossing your arms. “No angle. If you don’t want them, you don’t have to take them. Simple.”
“I didn’t say I didn’t want them,” Damian said quickly, his tone defensive.
You raised an eyebrow, suppressing a smile. “Oh? So you do want them?”
He scoffed, snatching the plate from your hands like you might change your mind. “I’ll try them. But don’t expect me to praise you if they’re subpar.”
“Wouldn’t dream of it.”
Damian took a deliberate bite, his expression carefully guarded as he chewed. You watched him closely, waiting for his reaction.
“Well?” you asked.
He paused, his lips twitching ever so slightly before he schooled his face back into indifference. “Adequate.”
You snorted. “Adequate, huh? That’s basically high praise coming from you.”
“Tt. Don’t let it go to your head,” he muttered, but he didn’t stop eating.
You grinned, shaking your head as you turned to leave. “Enjoy them, Damian. Or don’t. Whatever.”
As you walked away, you heard him mutter under his breath, just loud enough for you to catch: “I will.”
You didn’t look back, but you couldn’t help the small smile that tugged at your lips.
No, things between you and Damian weren’t perfect. But this? This was progress.
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Stephanie twirled her mug between her hands, the steam curling into the air as she sat perched on the couch at the Clocktower. Across the room, Cassandra sat cross-legged on the floor, cleaning and reassembling her grappling gun with quiet precision. The rhythmic sound of Cassandra’s movements usually put the blonde at ease, but today, she couldn’t shake the restless thoughts spinning in her head.
“I don’t get it,” Stephanie muttered finally, breaking the silence.
Cass didn’t look up, but the subtle tilt of her head told Steph she was listening.
“It’s been almost three weeks,” Steph continued, gesturing with her mug like it emphasized her point. “Three weeks since (Name) quit, and I haven’t seen her here. Not once. No check-ins, no training, no anything. She just… stopped. Like she wasn’t serious about any of it to begin with.”
Cass paused her movements, her sharp gaze flicking to Steph. “Serious..?”
“Y’know, serious about being Batgirl..!” Steph exclaimed, setting her mug on a table with a clink. “I mean, she was so into it. Always had to be the best, always trying to prove she could do everything better than me. And now? Nothing. It’s like she dropped off the face of the earth.”
Cass raised an eyebrow, her hands moving again to tighten the grappling gun’s grip. “You miss her.”
“What? No! I—” Steph’s protest faltered under Cass’s calm stare. “Okay, maybe a little. But that’s not the point.” She leaned forward, her elbows on her knees. “It’s just so unlike her. You know what I mean?”
Cass considered this for a moment, then nodded. “She fights. Always fights. And she doesn’t stop.”
“Exactly!” Steph said, throwing her hands up. “She’s stubborn as hell. She’d never just quit without a reason. It’s like she’s a completely different person all of a sudden.”
Cass’s gaze stayed steady on Steph, her expression unreadable. “Maybe something happened.”
Steph frowned. “Like what?”
Cass furrowed her eyebrows, setting her grappling gun aside and leaning back on her hands. “I don’t know. But something.”
“That’s what I’ve been trying to figure out,” Steph admitted, slumping against the back of the couch. “I mean, yeah, we weren’t exactly besties or whatever, but we spent enough time together. I thought I had her figured out. Now I feel like I don’t know her at all.”
Cass tilted her head. “Did you? Know her?”
Steph opened her mouth to respond but stopped. She hadn’t really thought about it that way. Most of her interactions with you had been competitive or snarky, sure, but there had been moments—rare ones—where it felt like there was something deeper under the surface. She just hadn’t taken the time to dig for it.
“I don’t know,” Steph admitted, her voice quieter. “Maybe I didn’t. But I thought I did.”
Cass nodded slowly, as if that answer didn’t surprise her.
“What about you..?” Steph asked, turning the question back on Cass. “What do you think of all this?”
Cass didn’t answer immediately. She sat in thoughtful silence, her dark eyes focused on nothing in particular. “Not sure,” she said finally. “It feels… off. Like she’s hiding.”
Steph frowned. “Hiding what?”
“I… don’t know.”
The room fell silent as Steph mulled over Cass’s words. For all your bravado and stubborness, there had always been something raw about you, like you were desperate to hold onto something—anything. Maybe Cass was right. Maybe something had happened—something you didn’t want anyone to know.
Stephanie sighed, reaching for her mug again. “You’re probably right. She’s hiding something. But what exactly is she hiding, that’s the question.” She took a sip of her coffee, grimacing slightly at the bitterness. “I hate not knowing. It’s driving me nuts.”
Cass offered a small, almost imperceptible smile. “You care.”
“Of course I care!” Steph shot back, her cheeks flushing slightly. “I mean, yeah, she’s annoying and stubborn and always has to prove she’s better than me, but…” She trailed off, her voice softening. “She’s still one of us. Right?”
Cass nodded, the smile lingering.
Stephanie leaned back again, staring at the ceiling. “Maybe I’ll try talking to her. Or something. I don’t know. This is just… weird. It doesn’t feel right. To just leave things as it is.”
Cass watched Stephanie closely, her quiet curiosity cutting through the lingering silence. “What was it like?” she asked, her voice calm but insistent. “Between you and her?”
Steph froze, mid-sip of her coffee. Her first instinct was to deflect, to brush the question off with a joke or a sarcastic remark. But Cass’s gaze—steady, patient, unyielding—made it clear she wasn’t going to let it slide.
“What do you mean, ‘what was it like?’” Steph muttered, setting her mug down with more force than necessary.
“You and (Name),” Cass said, gesturing vaguely with her hand. “Before all this. When she was still Batgirl. When you were still Spoiler. When you became Batgirl as well.”
Steph shifted uncomfortably, her lips pressing into a thin line.
What was it like?
“It was… complicated,” she said finally.
It was anything but normal.
Cass tilted her head, waiting for her to elaborate. Steph sighed, leaning forward and resting her elbows on her knees.
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Stephanie could still remember her first few nights as Spoiler, still rough around the edges and carrying the weight of Cluemaster, her father’s, shadow on her shoulders. She’d been furious when she found out after he claimed to be “rehabilitated”, he actually returned to crime instead, leaving no clues behind this time. She knew then and there that something had to be done—that she had to do something—to stop her father. So, she made her Spoiler costume, and set out to stop her father. That night, she’d intercepted one of his coded messages and had made the decision to spoil yet another of his schemes—alone.
It hadn’t gone according to plan.
The warehouse was dark and cold, lit only by a few dim bulbs hanging from the rafters. Stephanie had crept in quietly, her heart pounding as she hid in the shadows. The stolen tech Cluemaster planned to sell sat piled high in crates, guarded by a dozen armed men. She’d hoped to sneak in, plant some evidence for the police, and leave unnoticed. Instead, she’d tripped a motion sensor and found herself surrounded.
She fought back with everything she had, but it wasn’t enough. Her moves were sloppy, unrefined, and born of sheer desperation. A blow to her ribs sent her sprawling across the floor, and she barely managed to roll out of the way of another thug’s steel-toed boot. Just when it seemed like she was out of options, a flash of movement from the rafters caught her attention.
You arrived like a force of nature, swooping down in your Batgirl suit, taking out two of the goons before they even knew what hit them. For someone who appeared composed and confident, Stephanie noticed quickly that your movements weren’t as fluid as you likely hoped they were. You were good—better than her, no question—but your hits didn’t land with perfect precision, and you occasionally stumbled, as though still learning the weight of your cape.
Still, the two of you managed to fight off the group, leaving the thugs groaning on the ground. Stephanie was leaning against one of the crates, clutching her side and breathing heavily, when you turned to her.
“Who are you?” you demanded, stepping forward.
“I’m…” She hesitated, brushing off her torn sleeve and trying to stand straighter. “I’m Spoiler.”
“Never heard of you.” You crossed your arms, looking her up and down. “What are you even doing here? Who are you working with?”
Stephanie groaned, more from frustration than pain. “I’m not working with anyone.”
“Then why are you here?” You gestured to the tied-up henchmen. “This isn’t exactly a neighborhood bake sale.”
“I’m here to stop my father,” she snapped, throwing her arms up.
That made you pause. “Your… father?”
She sighed, already regretting the slip. “Yeah. My father.”
You frowned, the pieces slowly clicking together. “Wait… you’re Cluemaster’s daughter?”
“Congrats, you solved the mystery, want a prize for that?” she muttered sarcastically, shrugging your hand off her arm when you instinctively tried to grab her.
You stepped back, your stance cautious now, your expression wary. “Why are you trying to stop him?”
“Because someone has to.” Stephanie said, her voice rising. “Because I don’t want people to get hurt because of him. Is that good enough for you, Batgirl?”
You stared at her for a long moment before sighing. “You shouldn’t even be out here. This isn’t a game.”
“I’m not treating it like one!” she shot back. “I know what I’m doing.”
“No, you don’t,” you replied bluntly, but your voice softened after a moment. “But… I guess I can see why you’re doing it.”
Stephanie braced herself for you to knock her out or drag her to Batman, but instead, you just grabbed the nearest thug and tied him up.
“You’re not going to say anything?” she asked, suspicious.
You didn’t look at her. “Not tonight. But don’t make me regret it.”
And with that, you had disappeared into the night, leaving Stephanie confused and to her own thoughts, unsure of what to think about you, Batgirl.
Why did you let her go?
It didn’t make sense.
Stephanie leaned back against the nearest crate, ignoring the dull ache in her ribs as her mind spiraled. Was it pity? Did you feel sorry for her something?
The thought stung more than she wanted to admit. She didn’t need anyone’s pity—least of all from someone who’d clearly been at this vigilante thing longer than her. Or maybe—you just thought she wasn’t worth the effort of turning in.
Over the next few weeks—for some reason—Stephanie kept on running into you. Sometimes it was because you were actively following her, and sometimes it was sheer coincidence. Each time, the dynamic between the two of you shifted slightly.
“I don’t need your help,” Steph had snapped when you intervened in another one of her plans to foil her father’s, her voice tinged with irritation. She’d bitten off more than she could chew, but the last thing she wanted was you swooping in to save her.
“You’re welcome,” you’d replied coolly, barely glancing at her as you tied up the last of the thugs.
Steph had bristled. “I had it handled.”
“Sure you did,” you’d said, your tone dripping with sarcasm. “That’s why you were about two seconds away from getting your head bashed in.”
This cycle had continued for weeks—an endless back-and-forth of barbed comments and unspoken challenges.
But then there were quieter moments. Like this one night—you both got stuck during a freezing rainstorm, huddled together under a flimsy overhang.
“You’re shivering,” you’d noted, tossing your extra cloak over her shoulders without a second thought.
Steph had blinked at you, surprised. “…Thanks.”
“Don’t mention it,” you’d said, leaning back against the wall and pulling your own cloak tighter around you.
That same night she’d cornered you on the rooftop after the two of you left evidence for the police and Batman to find to deal with Cluemaster.
“Why?” she’d asked, crossing her arms. “Why’d you go along with my plan instead of running to Batman?”
You’d glanced at her, your expression unreadable. “Because you’re not like him,” you’d said simply.
“Cluemaster, I mean. And because… I do think you mean it. The whole ‘trying to stop my father’ thing.”
For a moment, Stephanie had been speechless. She hadn’t expected that kind of answer—or the quiet sincerity behind it.
She hadn’t expected that. Not from a Bat. They weren’t exactly known for handing out compliments—or trust. Especially not to someone like her.
But then again, from the moment she met you, you hadn’t exactly acted the way she thought someone trained under Batman would. Not that she would know what that was like.
Stephanie’s arms dropped to her sides as she studied you, standing there under the faint glow of the Gotham skyline. You didn’t look like you were second-guessing your words or regretting them. You were calm like you’d just stated a fact. Like you really meant it.
Stephanie felt the knot in her chest tighten. What if you were wrong? What if she was like him? She hadn’t exactly proven otherwise had she?
Sure, she was trying to stop him now, but that didn’t erase the fact that she was his daughter. His blood ran through her veins, no matter how much she hated it.
But then, there was another thought, quieter and harder to ignore. What if you weren’t wrong? What if—just maybe—you’d seen something in her she couldn’t see herself?
Stephanie didn’t know what terified her more then—the idea that someone believed in her, or the possibility that you might be right,
She glanced at you again, half-expecting you to take it back or brush it off like it didn’t matter. But you didn’t. You just stood there, calm and steady, like your words had been obvious all along.
And for a moment, she let herself believe it. Just a little.
“Thanks,” she muttered, her voice barely audible, as she looked away. She didn’t know if you heard her or if you’d even care, but it felt like something she had to say.
When she turned back around though, you were gone.
Stephanie blinked, her breath catching for a moment as she scanned the empty rooftop. “Really?” She muttered, dragging a hand down her face.
“Was that a ‘dramatic exit’ thing, or do all you bats have to disappear every time someone tries to say thanks?”
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“Afterwards…” Steph began, her voice soft. “I didn’t really get to see much of her.”
Cass looked up briefly, her head tilting in silent acknowledgment.
“I mean, even after I met you,” Steph continued, “I didn’t see much of her. I thought we were chill. You know?”
Cass’s hands paused over the grappling gun. “Thought?”
Steph hesitated, biting the inside of her cheek. Her gaze fell to her mug, and she let out a slow breath. “I guess… everything kind of changed when Bruce ‘died.’” She set the mug on the table and leaned back against the couch. “When you quit being Batgirl, and gave me your costume to take over you.”
Cass blinked, her expression neutral but her body language subtly shifting. “Oh.”
Steph turned to face her fully, brows knitting together. “I thought things would still be fine, but no. Not when Dick and Babs allowed me to take up the Batgirl mantle.”
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Stephanie had found you on the rooftop of an old apartment building, your silhouette outlined against the Gotham skyline. The wind cut through the air, sharp and cold, but you didn’t flinch, your posture rigid as though the weather didn’t touch you.
“I figured you’d be here,” she’d said softly, walking closer, the crunch of gravel under her boots breaking the silence.
“What do you want, Stephanie?” Your voice was hoarse and low, but your tone was sharp enough to stop her mid-step.
Steph froze, the weight of the Batgirl costume suddenly feeling heavier than ever. There was something in the way you said her name—so cold, so distant—it made her chest tighten.
“I just… wanted to talk.”
You let out a dry, humourless scoff, still not turning to face her.
Stephanie clenched her fists at her sides, willing herself to continue. “Look, I know you’re upset. I don’t know why Dick decided to bench you from being Batgirl, but—“
“Oh, you don’t know?” You spun around, finally facing her, your eyes burning with frustration. “It’s because of you, Stephanie. He benched me so you could play hero. He chose you. You. Over me. He’s saying I wasn’t good enough to be Batgirl. His Batgirl.”
Stephanie’s heart sank at the venom in your voice. She took a step closer, shaking her head. “That’s not true… Cass wanted me to take over her as Batgirl because—“
“Because what?” you snapped, voice rising. “Because she thought I couldn’t handle it? Because she thought you deserved it more than I do?”
“No!” Steph said quickly, her voice breaking slightly. “Because she thought I needed it. And maybe she’s right. But that doesn’t mean—“
“It doesn’t mean what?” you interrupted bitterly. “That it wasn’t a slap in the face? That it didn’t rip away the only thing I had left?”
Your voice broke, just slightly, and Stephanie’s heart clenched as she watched your walls crack under thr weight of your emotions.
“My father is dead, Stephanie. The one thing that he gave me that meant something, the one thing that I thought could truly be mine, was ripped away. Do you know how much it hurts to watch you parade in that suit like it didn’t mean anything to me? Like I don’t mean anything?”
“It’s not like that,” Steph shot back, her voice more desperate. “I didn’t mean for it to happen this way. I never wanted to hurt you—“
“Just stop,” you interrupted, turning away from her again. Your shoulders were stiff, your voice cutting like ice.
“I don’t care what you wanted. I don’t care what excuses you or Barbara or Dick have. They decided you were better than me. That I wasn’t good enough. That I was expendable.”
“That’s not true,” Steph said desperately.
“Oh sure,” you said, your voice dripping with sarcasm. “You somehow convinced Dick and Barbara to let you play Batgirl while I’m sidelined and tossed aside. Don’t even try to tell me you didn’t know what this would do to me.”
Stephanie felt frustration bubbling under the surface. “Do you think I have it easy? Barbara doubted me from the start! She didn’t think I’d survive as Batgirl. She only gave me a chance because I refused to back down—“
“So then why did they replace me?” you snapped, your eyes glistening with tears you refused to let fall. “Why did they bench me while you got to take my place? Even Cassandra seems to think you’re better than me.”
Steph froze. “That’s—“
“Am I really that replaceable?” you interrupted, your voice trembling.
Stephanie opened her mouth, but no words came out.
You let out a bitter laugh, shaking your head. “Save it, Stephanie. I don’t care what their reasons are. You want the mantle? Fine. It’s yours. But don’t come here pretending you didn’t know what this would do to me.”
Stephanie took a shaky step forward. “I’m not trying to—“
“I’ll prove them wrong,” you interrupted, your voice dropping to a deadly whisper. “I’ll prove I’m better than you. Better than any of them thought I could be. Even if it’s the last thing I do.”
Stephanie stared at you, stunned, as your words hung heavy in the air.
“So enjoy being Batgirl, Stephanie,” you said coldly. “And stay the hell away from me.”
Steph stood there for a long moment, frozen, as your words hung in the air. She wanted to say more, to fix this somehow, but the look in your eyes told her there was nothing she could do.
Without another word, she turned and walked away, her footsteps fading into the night as you turned back to the skyline, the cold wind biting at your skin.
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Stephanie’s hands tightened around her mug as she replayed the memory in her mind.
“From then on,” Steph said, her voice soft, “she did everything she could to one-up me. Patrol routes, takedowns, intel—anything. It was like she was trying to prove herself, not just to Dick and Barbara, but to me, too.”
Cass tilted her head slightly, her expression unreadable.
Steph hesitated before asking, “Why… didn’t you seem bothered by her quitting? Didn’t it… I don’t know, feel weird to you?”
Cass stayed silent, her hands stilling over the grappling gun.
“Cass?” Stephanie pressed.
Cassandra sighed softly. “If it’s what she wanted, then everyone should respect it.”
“But isn’t it weird? That she suddenly quit?”
Cass’s gaze flickered. “Yeah,” she admitted, her voice calm. “But it’s better if she doesn’t continue this path.”
Steph’s brow furrowed. “Better? What do you mean?”
Cass hesitated, her voice even. “She wasn’t built for this life.”
Steph blinked, confused. “Wait, what? What are you talking about?”
Cass looked at her, her voice quieter but resolute. “I’ve always seen it. A… blockage. In her body language. When she fights, when she moves, it’s always there. It never goes away.”
Steph tilted her head, confused. “A blockage? What does that even mean..?”
“It’s like… a wall she can’t break through.” Cass explained, her tone calm but firm. “No matter what she does, it stops her from reaching her full potential. And that wall… it’s dangerous. For her.”
“But she’s strong—“ Steph opened her mouth to protest, but Cass cut her off, her tone firmer.
“She’s strong,” Cass agreed, “but not for this. That blockage is something she can’t overcome. And if she keeps pushing herself, it’ll hurt her. Worse than being benched. Worse than losing the mantle. She should live a normal life. Away from this.”
Steph stared at Cass, her confusion shifting into an uneasy understanding. The weight of Cass’s words settling heavily in her chest. Cass’s ability to read body language was unparalleled—if anyone could see something like that, it was her.
“But…” Steph started, trailing off, her voice uncertain.
Cass shook her head, her voice soft but final. “This life—it would break her. It’s better this way. For her.”
Stephanie leaned back into the couch, the weight of Cass’s words pressing down on her. For the first time, she felt a flicker of doubt—not about you, but about what this life demanded of you.
It didn’t make sense. None of it did.
Her thoughts swirled as she tried to piece it all together. Cassandra had always been the most perceptive person Stephanie had ever known, able to read people in ways that felt almost supernatural. If she said there was a “blockage,” some invisible wall holding you back, Steph believed her. She had no reason not to.
But why hadn’t Cass told you about it? Why hadn’t she tried to help you work through it instead of letting you walk away? Cass wasn’t the type to give up on people, so why had she just… let you go?
Stephanie’s grip tightened on the mug. She thought back to the nights she’d watched you push yourself too far, the way you’d thrown yourself into patrols and fights with a reckless determination that bordered on desperation. It made sense now, in a way. You weren’t just trying to be good enough—you were trying to be better than everyone’s doubts.
“I don’t…” Stephanie hesitated, her words faltering. “I don’t know how to feel about this.”
Cassandra didn’t respond, her silence stretching between them like the distant hum of the city outside.
The weight of the conversation pressed on Steph’s chest, but then a stray thought flickered in her mind, pulling her out of her tangled emotions. She striaghted slightly, her brow furrowing.
“Wait. Where’s Barbara anyway?” she asked, glancing around the Clocktower.
Cass tilted her head, thinking. “Not sure,” she said simply. “I think… she said she had plans. With someone.”
Steph raised an eyebrow. “Plans? With who?”
Cass shrugged, her expression giving nothing away.
Steph groaned, flopping back against the couch. “Great. So now Barbara is being cryptic too. What is it with you Bat people and your secrets?”
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The lunch spot was cozy but buzzing with just enough noise to drown out any awkward silences—though not nearly enough to mask the tension sitting between you and Barbara. She sat across from you, her gaze flickering between the menu in her hands and you.
You should have refused the lunch. Should have claimed you were busy. But the text Barbara sent you left you with no real excuse:
“Lunch? 1 PM? Don’t pretend you’re busy, I know your schedule. ☕”
And so here you were, caught in what felt like an ambush.
As the server came over, you placed your order for a black coffee and a bagel.
Barbara blinked, momentarily caught off guard. “Black coffee?” she repeated after the server left, her brows slightly raised.
You glanced up from your phone. “Yeah?”
“I just… didn’t think you’d be the type.”
It took you a moment to register her confusion, but then it hit you. Back when you were sixteen, you hated coffee—especially black coffee. You’d always opted for sugary drinks or anything sweet enough to mask the bitterness. Sixteen year old you would’ve gagged at the bitterness of black coffee. But time had changed you, as had many sleepless nights spent staring at mission briefs or reports, that you’ve gotten used to the taste of coffee.
“Just need all the energy I can get,” you replied, plastering on a small smile.
Barbara hummed, clearly unconvinced but unwilling to push further.
The two of you fell into a strange silence, interrupted only by the soft clinking of cutlery and quiet chatter around you. Barbara shifted in her wheelchair, wondering why this felt so… awkward.
Were you always this… standoffish?
After what felt like forever, Barbara finally spoke up. “I heard about what happened to your friend.”
Your fingers stilled against the edge of your cup. Oh.
Barbara glanced at you, gauging your reaction before continuing. “I just… wanted to say I’m sorry. That he got caught up in everything. I should have been more thorough.”
Your lips twitched downward, your voice coming out sharper than intended. “Yeah. You should have.”
The words left your mouth before you could stop them. Barbara’s eyes widened ever so slightly, the honesty of your tone catching her off guard.
Silence again. This time heavier.
The tension thickened between you both, the silence growing louder by the second. Barbara swallowed hard, feeling the weight of your words settle uncomfortably in her chest.
She opened her mouth again, determined to steer the conversation somewhere less hostile. “How’s school?”
You shrugged, your tone clipped. “It’s alright.”
“Are classes okay? Teachers good?”
“They’re fine.”
Barbara frowned, but she pressed on. “And your friends? Have you made any new ones?”
“No, not really.”
This wasn’t working. Every answer you gave was short, distant, like you were putting up walls. It felt unnatural, almost deliberate. Barbara wasn’t sure if she should press harder or back off entirely.
“You’re not mad at me, are you?” she finally asked, unable to hold back her curiosity any longer. Was this about your friend getting hurt? Was this about her not being quick enough to prevent the incident? Or was it something else all together?
You paused, but your face remained impassive. “No,” you replied flatly, taking a bite of your bagel.
Barbara’s stomach twisted.
That wasn’t a no.
Not really.
Before she could respond, a voice spoke from behind her.
“Hey, I thought I recognized you two!”
The familiar voice broke through the tension like a wrecking ball, and Barbara couldn’t have been more relieved.
Dick.
He slid into the seat next to Barbara, flashing his trademark grin, though his eyes darted to you with a hint of hesitation. “What’s this? A secret meeting without me?”
Oh, so this was a setup.
Dick must have told Barbara about you avoiding him, and they must have planned this.
You straightened, folding your arms and leaning back into your chair like a wall had gone up.
Dick, oblivious, leaned forward with his usual enthusiasm. “What are you guys talking about? School? Life? Come on, catch me up.”
“Not much to catch up on,” you muttered.
Dick frowned slightly but pressed on, his tone light and cheerful. “You know, I’ve been meaning to hang out with you more, (Name). It feels like we haven’t really spent time together lately.”
You didn’t respond.
“Maybe we could grab dinner sometime?” Dick offered, smiling earnestly. “Or I could swing by the manor and we could—”
“I actually have plans, so I can’t stay,” you said curtly, reaching for your bag.
Dick blinked, surprised by the sudden shift. “What? No, wait,” he said quickly, leaning forward. “You just got here.”
“I already told you,” you said, standing up. “I have plans. I can’t hang out.”
“But—”
“Thanks for lunch, Barbara,” you interrupted, sparing Barbara a quick glance before heading for the exit.
“Wait—”
You were already gone.
Dick watched you go, his shoulders sagging as the door swung shut behind you. He slumped back in his seat, rubbing a hand over his face. For a moment, he was quiet, his usual energy dimmed.
Barbara sighed, setting her cup down. She wanted to comfort him, but she didn’t have the words. After all, you’d been acting the same way toward her. Aloof, distant, standoffish.
“Don’t take it personally.”
That was all she could come up with.
Dick frowned. “She’s never acted like this before. It’s like she doesn’t even want to be around me.”
Barbara didn’t respond. She didn’t know what to say. She just wished she had an answer.
“She hates me,” he said quietly, his voice almost drowned by the chatter from the cafe.
Barbara glanced up at the man. “She doesn’t hate you, Dick.”
“Feels like it,” he muttered, running a hand down his face. “It’s like every time I try to talk to her, I just make things worse.” He paused, swallowing thickly. “….You don’t think she’s acting like this because of what happened before, do you?”
Barbara leaned back in her chair, her expression softening. “Which part of ‘before’ are we talking about?”
Dick’s gaze dropped to the floor as his mind pulled him back, unbidden, to those first turbulent days after Bruce’s death.
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The cave had never felt more suffocating, its dim light and cold walls amplifying the tension crackling in the air. You stood across from Dick, your posture tense, fists clenched at your sides.
“You’re benching me?” Your voice was sharp, anger barely masking the hurt underneath.
“It’s not permanent,” Dick said, his tone measured but firm. “You’re not in the right headspace right now—”
“I’m fine,” you snapped, cutting him off. “I’m doing my job, same as I always have.”
“No, you’re not,” Dick countered, his voice tightening. “You’re reckless. You’re putting yourself in danger for no reason.” He took a step closer, his jaw tight. “I’ve seen you out there, and it’s like you’re not even trying to come back in one piece. You’re acting like you have nothing to lose.”
Your heart lurched at his words, but you refused to show it. “Don’t stand there and psychoanalyze me. I’m doing my job. If you think I’m not good enough, just say it.”
Dick let out a frustrated sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose. “That’s not what I’m saying, and you know it. You’ve been through hell—losing Bruce—your father—and instead of giving yourself time to deal with it, you’re throwing yourself into the field like you have a death wish.”
Your fists clenched tighter. “So what? I’m just supposed to sit around, doing nothing? Let Gotham fall apart while you and Damian play Batman and Robin? I’m trying to help, Dick!”
“I know you are,” Dick said, his voice softening, but there was a steel edge to it. “But this isn’t helping. Not like this. You’re going to get yourself killed, and I can’t—” He stopped himself, shaking his head.
“You can’t what?” you demanded, stepping closer, your voice trembling with anger. “You can’t trust me? Can’t rely on me? What, am I just some burden to you now?”
“That’s not what I’m saying!” Dick snapped, his frustration finally boiling over. His voice echoed through the cave, bouncing off the walls. “I’m saying I care about you, and I’m not going to stand by and watch you destroy yourself like this.”
The raw emotion in his voice caught you off guard, but it only fueled the fire burning in your chest. “You don’t care about me,” you spat. “If you did, you’d let me do what I’m good at instead of sidelining me. You’re becoming just like father—deciding what’s best for everyone else without asking.”
Dick flinched at the comparison, but he recovered quickly, his expression hardening. “This isn’t about control. It’s about keeping you alive. You’re grieving, and it’s clouding your judgment. Until you can think clearly, I can’t let you keep putting yourself in danger.”
“You can’t let me?” you repeated, your voice cracking as your anger reached its peak. “You’re not my father, Dick. You don’t get to tell me what I can or can’t do!”
“No, I’m not your father,” Dick shot back, his voice low but sharp. “But I am your brother. And I am Batman now. So it’s my call.”
The words landed like a blow, cutting through the air between you. Your breathing was ragged, your chest heaving as you stared at him, your emotions warring inside you—anger, betrayal, grief, all swirling together until you couldn’t separate one from the other.
“Fine,” you said finally, your voice cold and flat. “Do what you want. Bench me. Replace me. I don’t care.”
Dick’s expression flickered, a crack in his resolve, but you didn’t give him a chance to respond. You turned on your heel and stormed out of the cave, your footsteps echoing behind you.
The memory twisted in Dick’s chest like a knife. A few days later, he’d seen someone in Cassandra’s Batgirl costume, her movements unfamiliar, the seams of the mantle not quite fitting yet.
“Tsk, tsk. Sloppy.” Damian had commented.
“How is this the woman who led the League of Assassins? The “warrior” who ran the outsiders at father’s command?” he had asked sharply.
“You’re right..” Dick muttered, narrowing his eyes as he realized who it was.
“She’s not as good as the other batgirls..”
When he confronted Barbara about mentoring Stephanie, the conversation had been anything but calm. She believed in Stephanie, believed Gotham needed a Batgirl. He’d been reluctant, furious that Barbara had allowed Stephanie to go around Gotham wearing that Bat symbol on her chest when she’s not prepared for what the city has become in the absence of Batman. But he’d eventually agreed, seeing how much Stephanie needed this, seeing how much Barbara needed this too.
But when you found out? That had been the breaking point.
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The sound of hurried, angry footsteps echoed through the Batcave, snapping Dick’s attention from the monitor. He turned just as you came storming in, radiating anger.
“Are you serious?” you demanded, your voice sharp enough to cut through the quiet hum of the cave’s machinery.
Dick sighed, already bracing himself for the confrontation. He should have expected this, but the fury radiating off you still caught him off guard.
“Stephanie’s Batgirl now?” you said, your words laced with disbelief. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”
“She’s doing good work,” Dick said, keeping his tone neutral, though he could already feel the tension building.
“She’s replacing me!” you snapped. “Neither you nor Barbara even thought to talk to me about this. Not a single word. You didn’t think for one second about how I’d feel.”
“She’s not replacing you, (Name),” Dick said, his voice taut as he tried to keep his composure.
“Yes, she is,” you shot back, your tone rising. “You’re saying I’m not good enough. That I’m not fit to be Batgirl anymore.”
“That’s not what this is about,” Dick countered, his patience beginning to fray.
“Then what is it about?” you challenged, stepping closer. “Because from where I’m standing, it looks like you decided I wasn’t worth it. You didn’t even give me a chance to prove I’m not—”
“You don’t have to prove anything,” Dick interrupted sharply.
“Clearly, I do!” you spat. “Because you didn’t just bench me. You handed over my mantle to someone else, like I didn’t matter. Like I’m just… disposable!”
“That’s not what happened,” Dick said, his voice rising. “This isn’t about replacing you—it’s about keeping you alive!”
You froze for a split second, stunned, before your expression hardened. “Keeping me alive? What the hell are you talking about?”
Dick exhaled sharply, running a hand down his face. “Like I already told you, you’ve been reckless. Ever since Bruce died, you’ve been—”
“Don’t bring father into this,” you interrupted, your voice dangerously low.
“I have to,” Dick snapped back. “Because ever since he died, you’ve been running yourself into the ground, throwing yourself into danger without a second thought. You’re not thinking clearly, and it’s going to get you killed. I had to take you off the streets before it was too late.”
“I’m fine,” you said through gritted teeth.
“You’re not fine,” Dick retorted, his voice sharp. “You’re angry, you’re grieving, and you’re not in the right headspace to be doing this. You think I wanted to bench you? I didn’t have a choice.”
“There’s always a choice,” you bit out. “And you chose her.”
Dick’s jaw tightened. “Because Gotham needs a Batgirl who can think straight right now. Someone who isn’t running on grief and anger. That’s not you right now.”
“Oh, so Stephanie’s better than me now?” you said bitterly. “I see how it is. First, you replace Tim with Damian—without even talking to him about it—and now you’re doing the same thing to me.”
“This isn’t the same,” Dick said, his voice hardening.
“Isn’t it?” you challenged, stepping closer. “You didn’t even ask me. You just made the decision for me. Like I don’t get a say. Like I don’t matter.”
“Tim can handle himself,” Dick shot back, his voice sharp. “Damian can’t. He needed someone to guide him, someone to keep him from spiraling out of control.”
“And I don’t?” you fired back. “I lost my father, Dick. Everything changed the moment he’s gone. The ‘normalcy’ I had was no longer there. But instead of helping me, instead of guiding me, you just… tossed me aside. Like I wasn’t worth the effort.”
“That’s not what I did,” Dick said, his voice quieter but no less firm.
“Then what did you do?” you demanded, your voice cracking under the weight of your emotions.
“I’m trying to protect you!” Dick shouted, his frustration boiling over. “You don’t see it, but you’re not okay. You think you can just power through this, but you can’t. Not like this. If I let you keep going, you’d—” He stopped himself, his voice catching.
“I’d what?” you pressed, your voice trembling with a mix of anger and hurt.
Dick’s shoulders slumped, and he looked at you with a rawness in his expression you weren’t expecting. “You’d get yourself killed,” he said softly. “And I couldn’t live with that. Especially when I’m in charge.”
“Don’t make this about me being reckless or grieving or whatver you think is wrong with me,” you said through gritted teeth.
“It is about that!” Dick snapped, his voice rising even more than before. “You’re spiraling and you know it. You’re not in the right headspace to be out there right now, let alone as Batgirl.”
“I’m fine. I’ve been fine. I’m doing my job—“
“You’re throwing yourself into danger without thinking,” Dick interrupted, his voice sharp. “You’re not acting like someone who’s fine. You’re acting like you don’t care if you live or die, and I’m not going to let you do that under the Batgirl mantle.”
You stared at him, your chest heaving, your emotions a chaotic storm. But instead of softening, instead of understanding, the words only made the ache in your chest worse. “You don’t get to decide that for me,” you said coldly.
“Someone has to.”
You shook your head, tears pricking your eyes. “No. You don’t get to make that call, not for me. You didn’t even try to understand. You just made your decision and moved on.”
Without another word, you turned on your heel and stormed toward the exit, leaving Dick standing in the empty cave, his hands clenched at his sides.
Dick stood there, staring at the spot where you’d disappeared. His chest felt tight, a mix of guilt and frustration twisting inside him. He didn’t mean to hurt you. That was the last thing he wanted. But letting you keep going out there, in the state you were in, wasn’t something he could allow.
“It’s for your own good,” he murmured to himself, but the words rang hollow in the silence of the cave.
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Dick stared down at the hot cider Barbara ordered for him, the steam curling lazily above the cup. His voice was low, almost pained, as he broke the silence. “It had been rocky after that,” he admitted, the memory of your argument still sharp in his mind. “Even after I told her not to go out as Batgirl, she disobeyed me. Again and again.”
Barbara didn’t respond, her gaze steady on him, waiting for him to continue.
“I’d bench her, and she’d show up on patrols anyway,” Dick said, his tone bitter with frustration, but there was no hiding the regret beneath it. “At first, I thought she was just trying to prove a point—to prove me wrong—but the more I watched, the more I realized…” He trailed off, shaking his head. “She was just hurting. She threw herself into every fight like it didn’t matter if she came out of it.”
Barbara shifted in her wheelchair, her fingers tightening around her own mug.
Dick ran a hand through his hair. “I didn’t want to admit then, but I didn’t know how to handle it. I thought taking her off the streets would help, but it just pushed her further away. The fights got worse. She wouldn’t talk to me—or if she did, it would get messy. She didn’t trust me anymore.”
He paused, exhaling heavily. “And I don’t think she’s ever forgiven me for that.”
Barbara’s lips pressed into a thin line, but she stayed quiet, sensing there was more.
“When Bruce came back, I thought things would go back to normal,” Dick said, forcing a hollow chuckle. “I thought we could reset, you know? Bruce took over as Batman again, I went back to being Nightwing, and she officially went back to being Batgirl. It was like the pieces were all back in place. Like things were the way they were supposed to be.”
Barbara tilted her head slightly, catching the way his voice softened.
“But they weren’t,” he admitted, his voice breaking just slightly. “Not really.” He hesitated, gripping the edge of the table. “(Name) quit three weeks ago. Officially. And… she’s been avoiding me ever since. I see it in the way she leaves before I show up, the way she makes sure she’s never in the same room as me. It’s like—like whatever this is, it’s irreparable. Like I played into her quitting.”
Barbara reached out slightly, her hand brushing against his briefly, grounding him.
“I don’t think I was wrong in my decision,” Dick said, though there was an ache in his voice that made it hard to believe him. “I just—I handled it badly. I hurt her, Babs. And now, I don’t know if I’ll ever get the chance to make it right.”
He fell silent, staring into his drink like it held some sort of answer.
Barbara shifted her gaze to him, guilt clawing at her chest as her own memories surfaced.
“I…. should have handled things better too,” she admitted softly, almost to herself.
Dick glanced at her, surprised by the admission.
“I should have been there for her,” Barbara continued, her tone quiet but heavy with regret. “(Name) wasn’t in the right state of mind, and I knew that. I knew it. But I…” She hesitated, gripping her mug tightly. “I chose to focus on Stephanie instead. To guide her. To help her become Batgirl.”
“You were trying to do what was best for everyone,” Dick said gently, but Barbara shook her head.
“No, I wasn’t,” she said firmly. “I was avoiding the harder choice. Helping her—helping someone who was grieving, who was hurt, who needed someone to pull them out of that spiral—that would’ve taken more from me. More patience. More time. And I didn’t give it to her.”
Dick’s expression softened, but he didn’t interrupt.
“I thought Stephanie needed me more,” Barbara said, her voice cracking slightly. “She was trying so hard to prove herself, to find her place—find what she needs. And she deserved my guidance too—but I shouldn’t have left (Name) behind. Not like that.”
The two of them fell silent for a long moment, both lost in their thoughts.
“She deserved better from me,” Barbara murmured, her throat tightening. “And now I have to live with the fact that I didn’t give it to her. I have to live with the fact that I let this gap between us grow so big. And I don’t even know when it happened.”
Dick looked at her, his expression softening. “It’s not too late to fix that.”
Barbara gave him a small, sad smile. “How do you fix something when you don’t even know where to start?”
Dick opened his mouth to respond, but the weight of her words settled over him. He knew exactly how she felt. But just like her, he didn’t have an answer.
“She’s so… closed off now,” Dick said finally, his voice barely above a whisper. “I don’t even know how to approach her anymore. Every time I try, it’s like there’s this wall between us, and I just—” He stopped, exhaling sharply. “How did I mess up so bad?”
Barbara studied him, her heart aching at the vulnerability in his voice.
“I didn’t want to hurt her,” Dick admitted. “I just—I wanted her to be okay. I wanted her to stop putting herself in danger, to stop tearing herself apart over everything she lost back then. But now… I don’t know if I helped her at all. I think I just pushed her further away.”
Barbara placed a hand over his, squeezing it gently. “You did what you thought was right,” she said softly.
“Doesn’t make it hurt any less,” Dick muttered, his voice thick with regret.
They sat there in silence for a while, both of them weighed down by the choices they’d made and the consequences they were still grappling with. Neither of them knew how to bridge the gap you’d left behind—but they both knew they couldn’t just leave it like this. Not anymore.
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finally done with this chapter lol. it’s been long overdue, so sorry about that 😭😓 i had to rewrite a lot of these scenes so many times because i wasn’t satisfied with it…but hopefully you lot are okay with this chapter haha.. 😬🙃 i slightly adjusted stephanie’s relationship with reader in this compared to the background info i posted because i thought this would fit better with the dynamic i intended for her to have. but for now, have this while i’m going to take a semi-hiatus/break to celebrate my bday which is coming up in 4 days and some other stuff 🫶 next chapter will most likely come out on 28 dec so yeah, until then, i’ll still try to reply to whatever is in my inbox 🫨
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ahqkas · 3 days ago
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♯ I PLEDGE ALLEGIANCE TO MY DAD . . . for teaching me everything he knows ( dick grayson & jason todd as dads ! )
— fem!reader as mom, fluff, not edited, based on this req.!!
© ahqkas — all rights reserved. even when credited, these works are prohibited to be reposted, translated or modified
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. . . DICK GRAYSON !
dick was always great with kids; his natural warmth, patience, and humor made him a magnet for them, even before he became a father. he often thought back to his days as robin, remembering how bruce wayne took him in and gave him stability, and he wanted to offer that same feeling ( and definitely more ) to his children.
when you two first talked about having kids, he was equal parts excited and nervous about it. dick worried about balancing family life with his vigilante responsibilities, but he couldn’t wait to start a family with you. he knew that no matter what, you’d face it together
your first child, a boy, inherits your husband’s bright energy and natural charisma. from the moment your son was born, dick was a hands-on dad. midnight feedings? no problem. diaper changes? a breeze ( well, almost ). he approached fatherhood the same way he approached everything else—with passion and a healthy dose of humor
he’s not just the dad who builds the coolest blanket forts or makes pancakes shaped like bats; he’s the dad who listens, encourages, and shows up, no matter how tired he might be after a long night of patrol. even when exhaustion clings to him like a second skin, his kids come first. if his son wants to show him the new drawing he made, dick will sit down and marvel at it as if it belongs in a gallery. if his daughter has a nightmare, he’s at her bedside in seconds, stroking her hair and whispering how she’s okay and nothing’s gonna hurt her while he’s here until she drifts back to sleep
he’s the dad who remembers every detail about his kids’ lives—their favorite bedtime stories, their least favorite vegetables, the songs that make them smile—and makes sure they feel seen and heard every single day. when he’s with them, he’s fully present, setting aside his worries about blüdhaven or the weight of his world. to them, he’s not nightwing; he’s just dad, their safe place, the person they know will always be there no matter what
he teaches your son how to ride a bike, holding the seat steady as those wobbly first attempts make an appearance. “you’ve got this!” dick encourages his son, jogging beside him. when the first scrape happens—knees meeting pavement in a blur of surprise and pain—he’s there in an instant, crouching down with the kind of gentle urgency only a dad can master
his strong arms wrap around his son in a hug that says, i’ve got you, even as tears well up in the young eyes. he’s quick with jokes to soothe the sting, brushing dirt and pebbles off tiny palms. “hey, you know what? you’re officially a biker now. all the pros have scars to prove it.”
it doesn’t matter if he’s running on just a few hours of sleep or if his legs are sore from the night before. he’ll stay on that sidewalk all afternoon if it means helping his son find the courage to get back on the bike
when your daughter is born, it’s as if a new light ignites in dick’s heart, one that’s softer and warmer than anything he’s ever felt before. from the moment he holds her—tiny, delicate, and swaddled in pastel pink—he’s utterly smitten by the baby. his breath catches in his throat as her little fingers curl instinctively around one of his. it’s the smallest thing, but to him, it’s everything. he gazes at her with an awe that rivals the first time he stood under a gotham sunrise after a long patrol as robin
every little thing she does—every yawn, every sleepy coo, even the way she scrunches her nose—melts him completely. he’s the first to volunteer for late-night feedings, cradling her against his chest while whispering soft lullabies. “it’s okay, princess,” he murmurs, his voice low and soothing, as if the sound of it alone could shield her from the world
she’s the spitting image of you, but she’s got dick’s sense of curiosity and mischief. as she grows, it’s clear she’s a daddy’s girl through and through. dick spoils her with affection, often carrying her on his shoulders or letting her “style” his hair, even if it means showing up to patrol with hair ties
she’s the one who always convinces him to stay for “just one more bedtime story,” and dick can never say no to those puppy eyes. he does all the voices, acting out scenes with a dramatic flair that leaves her giggling uncontrollably
family movie nights are a regular occurrence. dick lets the kids pick the movie, even if it means sitting through the same animated film for the fifth time. he doesn’t mind—he’s just happy to have everyone snuggled up together
. . . JASON TODD !
jason never thought he’d be a dad. gotham wasn’t kind to kids, and in his darker moments, he felt like it had swallowed the boy he used to be whole. he worried his own traumas—nights spent cold and hungry on the streets, the ache of betrayal, the sting of abandonment—might cast shadows over the kind of father he’d want to be. how could he teach love and trust when his world had been built on survival and second chances?
the thought of holding a child, so small and fragile, scared him more than any villain ever could. what if he didn’t have it in him to be the kind of dad they deserved? what if his sharp edges cut too deep, or worse, he failed to protect them from the city that had failed him? jason had spent so long fighting his way through life that the idea of creating a safe, warm space for someone else felt like trying to plant flowers in a wasteland. and yet, the thought of building something good—something untouchable by gotham’s darkness—stirred a longing in him he couldn’t ignore.
when you told him you were pregnant with your first child, he was stunned silent for a solid minute. then came the slight tremble in his hands as he cradled your face and whispered, “we’re really doing this?” you swore you saw tears in his eyes, though he’d deny it later
he threw himself into preparing for fatherhood. between patrols, you’d catch him reading baby books, jotting down notes in that same serious way he planned missions. ( “what the hell is a diaper genie, baby? is it a genie for diapers, or does it genie them away?” )
when your first daughter was born, jason held her for the first time with an awe. he whispered promises to her, things like, “you’ll never go through what i did,” and “i’m gonna give you the world, princess.”
jason’s daughters own him. his rough, serious ide of personality melts into a puddle of mush when they so much as giggle at him. one pouty face, and he’s done for
when they’re little, he becomes a human jungle gym. they’ll climb all over him, pull on his hair, and stick stickers all over his face while he sits patiently, letting them “decorate” him. ( “you’re turning me into a unicorn, huh? cool. just don’t let your mom take pictures—too late? figures.” )
as they grow, he keeps a close eye on everything, from their friends to the neighborhoods they walk through. he’s not overbearing but has serious dad-radar. if they so much as mention a creepy guy or a mean teacher, he’s all, “do i need to handle this? no? you sure? okay, but say the word.”
by age eight, they’ve both mastered basic self-defense, thanks to “daddy’s fun time karate sessions.” he makes it a game—lots of laughter and encouragement—but underneath it, he’s deadly serious
when they’re older, he teaches them how to change a tire, handle their own money, and, much to your exasperation, how to throw a punch. ( “jason, they don’t need to know how to disarm a grown man at ten years old!” “baby, it’s gotham. yes, they do.” )
he’s the kind of dad who makes pancake breakfasts on weekends, complete with smiley faces and way too much syrup
on father’s day, his daughters surprise him with handmade cards every year. jason’s tough demeanor cracks every time he reads their scrawled messages: “daddy, you’re my hero.”
and jason as a father to teenage girls? lord, help us all.
when his eldest goes on her first date, he plays it cool—for all of two seconds. he grills the poor kid with subtle threats hidden behind a charming smile. ( “so, you like my daughter? good. treat her right, or you’ll have a real bad night. understand?” )
you have to remind him not to tail them when they go out. “jason, they’ll know you’re following them.” “i’ll stay a block behind. they’ll never see me.”
but despite his overprotectiveness, he’s their anchor during tough times. when they experience their first heartbreaks, he is there with hugs, ice cream, and the kind of pep talks that make them laugh through their tears. “anyone who doesn’t see how amazing you are isn’t worth crying over. you’re the todd girl. we don’t settle for less.”
deep down, jason worries about failing them. he knows what it’s like to lose everything, and the thought of his girls experiencing even a fraction of that makes his stomach churn
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rottenfyre · 3 days ago
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⸻ ᴊ ᴀ ʏ ʙ ɪ ʀ ᴅ ⸻
“ Robin & Batgirl: Gotham's Sweethearts ”
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Pairing: Dark Jason Todd x Fem Reader Part 2
Summary: He didn't expect to see someone like you. It was annoying at first, you were annoying. But he don't know when it start to change. Maybe this feeling was there since the day you smiled at him for the first time...
Warning: Teenagers in love.
Note: English is not my first language. Hope you enjoy!
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Wayne Manor was too much. Too big, too clean, too quiet. Jason hated it. Or, at least, that’s what he told himself as he followed Bruce through the front doors.
It wasn’t just the size of the place that bothered him. It was everything. The warmth that lingered in the air, like someone actually lived here instead of just passing through. The way the walls didn’t feel like they were pressing in on him, like they used to in the cramped, crumbling apartment he used to call home.
Jason’s fists clenched inside his jacket pockets as he stepped further inside, his boots scuffing against the polished floor. He didn’t belong here.
He kept his head down, unwilling to meet Bruce’s eyes. This was temporary. A rich guy playing charity case with some kid from Crime Alley—nothing more. Jason wasn’t about to let himself get comfortable.
Then he saw her.
She was sitting on the bottom step of the staircase, her elbows resting on her knees, like she’d been waiting. Her head tilted slightly when she noticed him, and then she smiled.
It wasn’t the kind of smile Jason was used to. Not the fake ones people forced because they had to. This one was different. It was warm, reaching her eyes in a way that made something in his chest tighten uncomfortably.
“This is Jason,” Bruce said, his voice calm and steady as he rested a hand on Jason’s shoulder. “He’ll be staying with us.”
Jason stiffened under Bruce’s touch, his eyes flicking back to her. She stood, her movements light and unhurried, and walked toward him. Not too fast, not too slow. Just enough to make him feel like she wasn’t trying to crowd him.
When she stopped, she was close enough for Jason to see the brightness in her eyes. She looked at him like she actually saw him—not the kid from the streets, not the screw-up. Just… him.
“Hi, Jason,” she said, her voice soft and easy. “I’m Y/N. It’s nice to meet you.”
Jason stared at her outstretched hand. He didn’t move.
Why was she looking at him like that? Like she meant it? No one ever did that. No one ever meant it.
He almost turned away, almost muttered something rude just to get her to stop looking at him like that. Sweet, kind people like her—they never stuck around. They never meant it.
But she didn’t move. Didn’t pull her hand away. She just stood there, waiting, her head tilting slightly as if she were trying to figure him out.
Jason’s jaw tightened. He didn’t like this. Didn’t like her. Or maybe he didn’t like the way she made him feel, like she’d cracked open a part of him he’d long since buried.
But he didn’t want to seem rude either—not when she was just standing there, smiling at him like he was worth something. So, reluctantly, he reached out and shook her hand.
Her hand was soft. Warm. It felt strange against his, like it didn’t belong to the same world he came from.
“You’re going to love it here,” she said, her voice sure and steady.
Jason wanted to scoff, to tell her she didn’t know anything about him or what he’d been through. But when he looked at her, at the way her eyes shone like she truly believed what she was saying, the words caught in his throat.
“Yeah. Sure,” he muttered, pulling his hand back quickly.
She didn’t seem bothered by his tone. If anything, her smile grew wider. It was disarming in a way Jason hated—because it made him want to believe her.
“I’ll show him around!” she said, glancing back at Bruce before looking at Jason again.
Jason almost protested. He didn’t need a tour, and he definitely didn’t need her looking at him like that—like he wasn’t just another lost cause. But when she turned back to him, her eyes still warm, still full of something Jason didn’t recognize, he found himself hesitating.
“Come on,” she said, motioning for him to follow her.
Jason trailed behind her, his hands shoved back into his jacket pockets. He didn’t trust her, not yet. But there was something about the way she walked, the way she turned back to glance at him like she actually cared, that made him want to trust her.
And for the first time in longer than he could remember, Jason didn’t feel like he was completely alone.
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Jason didn’t laugh. Not really. Not anymore.
He couldn’t remember the last time he had—not since before his mom died, maybe even before that. Laughter felt like something from another life, a luxury reserved for people who didn’t have to scrape by every day just to survive.
But somehow, she managed to change that.
They were sitting in the den. Bruce had called it a “common area,” but Jason couldn’t help thinking of it as some kind of museum with its pristine furniture and towering shelves of books. He didn’t belong here, and he felt it with every fiber of his being.
She didn’t seem to notice, though. She’d plopped down on the carpet next to him with a grin, cross-legged like they were at some middle school hangout and not in a billionaire’s mansion. She’d been talking, her words bubbling out as she shared some ridiculous story about a squirrel that had stolen Alfred’s tea biscuits earlier that day.
At first, Jason barely listened. He was used to tuning people out, especially when they were as chipper as she was. But her voice had a way of pulling him in, light and warm.
“And then Alfred’s standing there with the broom,” she was saying, her eyes wide with faux dramatics, “like he’s about to duel the squirrel. I swear, it was the funniest thing I’ve ever seen.”
She mimicked Alfred’s stiff posture and the way he’d apparently shouted, “Out, you fiend!” at the tiny intruder. Her voice cracked at the end, and she doubled over laughing, her shoulders shaking with pure joy.
Jason couldn’t help it. The corner of his mouth twitched. Just a little at first, almost unnoticeable, but then her laugh hit him—a bright, contagious sound that echoed in the big, quiet room. Before he knew it, he let out a soft chuckle.
He tried to stop himself, but she noticed. Her head snapped up, and she gasped like she’d just discovered buried treasure.
“Was that a laugh?” she asked, pointing at him. “Did Jason Todd just laugh?”
Her mock-serious tone and exaggerated expression did something to him. The chuckle turned into a quiet laugh, and then it built—small and hesitant, like it wasn’t used to being there. She gasped again, clutching her chest like she was witnessing a miracle, and that was it.
Jason lost it.
He laughed harder than he had in years, his head tipping back as his chest heaved. It wasn’t a controlled laugh, either—it was wild, raw, and unfiltered. Tears pricked his eyes, and he tried to wipe them away, but every time he looked at her, still wide-eyed and grinning, it started all over again.
She didn’t even know what she’d done to make him laugh, which only made it funnier. She started laughing too, a little confused but clearly enjoying it.
“Jason!” she managed to get out between giggles. “What—what’s so funny?”
“I don’t even—” he tried, but the words were swallowed by another round of laughter.
Jason’s sides hurt, his cheeks ached, and for the first time in a long time, he didn’t feel the heavy weight he always carried. He felt… light.
When they finally calmed down, she was lying back on the carpet, staring at the ceiling with a big, goofy smile on her face. Jason was sitting up, wiping the last of the tears from his eyes, his breath still uneven.
“I don’t know how you do it,” he muttered, shaking his head.
“Do what?” she asked, rolling onto her side to face him.
He didn’t answer right away. He couldn’t tell her what he was really thinking—that she’d made him feel human again, even if just for a moment. That her laughter had warmed something inside him he’d thought was frozen solid.
Instead, he smirked and said, “Make a complete idiot out of yourself.”
She gasped, pretending to be offended, and tossed a pillow at him. But he caught the twinkle in her eyes, the way her smile lingered even as she rolled her eyes at him.
Jason didn’t laugh often. But now, sitting there with her, he thought maybe it was okay to let himself feel something good every once in a while.
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“C’mon, Jaybird,” she said, her voice low and mischievous. “We’re ditching Bruce tonight.”
Jason froze mid-step, glancing toward where Bruce had gone, his figure already disappearing into the darkness. “What?”
“You heard me,” she said, tugging on his arm before leaping to the next rooftop. “Follow me!”
He didn’t know why he listened—maybe it was the way she said his name, like it was the only thing that mattered in that moment. Maybe it was the sheer audacity of ditching the Big Bad Bat himself. Or maybe it was just her.
Jason followed her, her laughter trailing behind her like music as she led him through Gotham’s skyline. They landed in a quiet corner of the city, far from the chaos, where a small ice cream cart sat under a flickering streetlight.
“Seriously?” Jason asked, raising an eyebrow as she handed him a cone.
“Seriously,” she said, already taking a bite of hers. “Even vigilantes deserve ice cream.”
He rolled his eyes but took a bite anyway, the cold sweetness melting on his tongue. It was stupid, he thought, standing there in his Robin suit, eating ice cream like a kid. But when she smiled at him, all he could do was smile back.
They walked a little farther, finding a spot on a hill overlooking the city. Fireworks were bursting in the distance, painting the night sky with flashes of color. She plopped down on the grass, patting the spot beside her.
Jason sat, feeling oddly out of place in the quiet. His lips twitched into a small smile, and he glanced at her, unsure what to say. Her face was close, too close, and before he could think of something snarky to deflect, she leaned her head against his shoulder.
Jason’s eyes widened. His heart was pounding so hard he was sure she could hear it.
He didn’t know what to do. She was so close, and her warmth seeped through his suit, chasing away the chill of the Gotham night. It wasn’t like she was heavy—she fit perfectly there, like she belonged.
Jason swallowed hard, staring at the fireworks as they burst in bright reds and golds. His mind was racing, but for once, the chaos in his head didn’t feel so loud.
He liked this. He liked her.
“You’re blushing,” she teased softly, her voice carrying a hint of laughter.
“Am not,” he muttered, but he didn’t pull away.
She tilted her head, looking up at him. Even in the faint glow of the fireworks, her smile was radiant. “You know, you’ve got really pretty eyes, Jaybird.”
Jason’s heart stuttered. Pretty. No one had ever called him that. He didn’t know what to say, so he just smiled, the corners of his lips quirking up despite himself.
Her voice broke through his thoughts, soft and full of affection. “You’re smiling, Jaybird.”
Jason hadn’t even realized he was. He let out a quiet chuckle. “Guess I am.”
He looked back at the sky, the fireworks reflecting in his wide green eyes. They were beautiful, he thought, but not as beautiful as the girl leaning on his shoulder.
It was beautiful. It was warm. It was lovely.
Just like her.
For the first time in forever, Jason felt like he could just exist, no walls, no armor. Just a boy sitting under the stars, sharing a moment with someone who made the world feel a little less cruel.
And for that, he was grateful.
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Jason’s knuckles ached as he drove his fist into yet another thug’s face. He could hear Bruce’s gruff voice somewhere behind him, barking orders like usual, but he wasn’t paying much attention. The adrenaline was too loud in his ears.
She was right beside him, quick and agile, taking down opponents with ease. Jason always marveled at how graceful she was in a fight—like it was a dance she’d perfected long ago.
But then, suddenly, she wasn’t there.
It happened so fast Jason didn’t even notice at first. He swung at another thug, but when he turned to check on her, she was gone.
His heart skipped a beat.
“Batgirl?” he called out, scanning the chaos around him. His voice cracked slightly, but he didn’t care. “Where are you?”
Bruce was still fighting, his focus unbroken, but Jason couldn’t ignore the knot forming in his stomach. She wouldn’t just leave. She never left.
“Batgirl!” he shouted again, louder this time.
Nothing.
Panic surged through him as he darted between the scattered thugs, his eyes darting to every shadow, every corner. What if something had happened to her? What if she was hurt—or worse?
His chest tightened.
“Dammit, where are you?” he muttered, his voice barely audible over the sounds of the fight.
And then, out of nowhere, she appeared.
Jason froze, his breath catching in his throat as he looked up. She was descending from above, hanging upside down from a rope like some kind of acrobat. Her mask couldn’t hide the playful grin on her face.
“Looking for me, Jaybird?” she teased, her voice light and carefree, as if she hadn’t just given him a heart attack.
Before he could respond, she leaned down and kissed him.
Jason’s eyes widened, his brain short-circuiting as her lips pressed against his. It was quick and unexpected, and his face went red hot in an instant.
When she pulled back, she was still grinning. Jason, on the other hand, was a mess.
“What the—why—what were you thinking?” he stammered, his voice an awkward mix of anger and embarrassment. His cheeks burned, and he could feel the heat rising to the tips of his ears.
She laughed, a soft, melodic sound that made his heart race even faster. “Oh, calm down, Jaybird. It was just a kiss.”
“Just a kiss?!” he spluttered, glaring at her through his blush. “You—you can’t just—”
He reached up to push her away gently, still too flustered to think straight. But as soon as his hand touched her shoulder, the rope snapped.
Jason’s heart dropped.
“Y/N!” he shouted, reaching for her, but she was already falling.
She hit the ground with a thud, and Jason was beside her in an instant, his hands hovering over her like he wasn’t sure what to do.
“Are you okay? I’m sorry! Dammit, I didn’t mean to—are you hurt?” he rambled, his voice filled with worry.
She winced but gave him a crooked smile. “I’m fine, Jaybird. Just bruised my pride a little.”
Before he could argue, she leaned up and kissed him again. This time, Jason didn’t freeze.
He kissed her back.
It was clumsy and hesitant, but it was real. Her lips were warm and soft, and for a moment, the chaos of the world around them faded away.
When she pulled back, she was smirking again, her eyes sparkling with mischief. “So, did you like it?”
Jason groaned, his blush returning with full force. “Shut up,” he muttered, looking anywhere but at her.
But even as he helped her up, his lips twitched into the smallest of smiles. Bruce could handle everything else for now. Jason was exactly where he wanted to be.
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The city stretched out before them, Gotham's endless sprawl of flickering lights and distant sirens. Jason liked it up here on the rooftops, where everything below felt a little less suffocating. The air was cooler, and the stars—hidden as they were by the smog—still seemed to fight to peek through.
She sat beside him, knees hugged to her chest, her mask discarded so she could feel the breeze. Jason was talking, half-joking about how one of the Joker’s goons had slipped on a banana peel during their last fight. His voice carried a rare lightness, a softness that only came out when they were alone like this.
“You should’ve seen his face,” Jason said with a grin. “It was like he’d just realized his whole life was one big punchline. Priceless.”
He chuckled to himself, but then he noticed she wasn’t laughing. She wasn’t even looking at the city. Her gaze was fixed on him, a soft smile tugging at her lips, her eyes shining with something he couldn’t quite place.
“What?” he asked, eyebrows furrowing. “What’s with that look?”
Her smile faltered just a little, but the warmth in her eyes didn’t fade. She took a deep breath, like she was bracing herself for something. “I love you.”
Jason froze.
Her words hung in the air, delicate and powerful all at once. His mouth opened slightly, like he was about to say something, but nothing came out. His brain stalled, caught between disbelief and a rush of emotions he couldn’t quite name.
“I—” she stammered, her cheeks flushing as she looked away. “I didn’t mean to just—forget I said anything. That was stupid, I—”
Jason reached out and grabbed her hand, his grip firm but careful, stopping her mid-sentence. She looked back at him, her eyes wide and uncertain, and he turned toward her fully.
“We’re going to get married,” he said, his voice steady, his eyes locked on hers.
Her mouth opened slightly, confusion flashing across her face. “W-What?”
“I said, we’re going to get married,” Jason repeated, dead serious. His jaw was set, his tone leaving no room for argument.
For a moment, she just stared at him, her lips parted in surprise. “Jason, that’s not—you can’t just say stuff like that—”
“You love me,” he interrupted, his voice softening, though his grip on her hand didn’t waver. “And I…” He hesitated, the words catching in his throat. “I love you too. So yeah. We’re getting married.”
She blinked at him, her face caught between disbelief and something he couldn’t quite name. And then, to his surprise, she laughed.
It started as a quiet chuckle but quickly grew into something brighter, freer, filling the cool night air. Jason couldn’t help it—he laughed too, the tension breaking as the sound bubbled up from his chest.
“You’re ridiculous,” she said, her voice still tinged with laughter.
“You’re the one who said it first,” Jason shot back, his lips quirking into a smirk.
She shook her head, her smile wide and unguarded as she wiped a stray tear from her cheek. “You scared the hell out of me for a second.”
“Good,” Jason said, though there was no edge to his words. His grip on her hand softened, and his thumb brushed against her knuckles almost absentmindedly.
As the laughter faded, the night grew quiet again. Jason glanced at her, taking in the way the moonlight softened her features, the way her hair caught the faint glow of the city lights.
In his heart, he made a silent promise.
He’d protect her, no matter what. Not because she needed it—she could hold her own better than anyone he knew—but because she deserved it. She deserved someone who’d fight for her, who’d stand by her no matter what Gotham threw their way.
Because he loved her.
And for once, Jason let himself feel that fully, without the usual fear or doubt creeping in.
“Hey,” she said, breaking the silence. “You’re staring at me now.”
Jason smirked, leaning back on his hands as he looked back out at the city. “Yeah? What about it?”
She smiled again, and this time, Jason felt it deep in his chest—a warmth that he knew he’d carry with him for the rest of his life.
She nudged him playfully, rolling her eyes. “Okay, Mr. Future Husband. Tell me this—would you ever kill for me?”
Jason’s expression softened. He didn’t even have to think about it. “Of course.”
She looked at him, her teasing grin slipping into something more thoughtful. “Really?”
“Yeah,” Jason said, his voice quieter now. “I’d do anything for you.”
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Next: Part 1. Part 3.
@ʀᴏᴛᴛᴇɴꜰʏʀᴇ 2024. ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ᴄᴏᴘʏ, ᴛʀᴀɴꜱʟᴀᴛᴇ ᴏʀ ᴜꜱᴇ ᴀɴʏ ᴏꜰ ᴍʏ ᴡᴏʀᴋꜱ ʜᴇʀᴇ ᴏʀ ᴀɴʏ ᴏᴛʜᴇʀ ᴡᴇʙꜱɪᴛᴇꜱ.
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targaryenrealnessdarling · 2 days ago
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For King and Kin
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22/12: Party and Position Changes - Aemond Targaryen Word Count: 1.6k~ | Warnings: mentions of pregnancy, smut, prince regent aemond, doggy
12 Days of Smuff Masterlist
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“She is of a weak disposition, I heard. Perhaps she is with child.”
“The Prince Regent certainly needs an heir.”
“He has looked sour since his Lady Wife left the celebrations.”
Aemond scoffed from his spot at the high table, circling a finger over the rim of his cup, half-filled with wine. They spoke as if he did not hear them, whispering such gossip. It was infuriating.
It was true that his lady wife suffered from sickness, especially in the mornings, but not exclusively. The maesters had told him in quiet confidence that they suspected she was with child, but that it was sensible to wait until the quickening to confirm.
What an excruciating wait.
She had graced the court with her presence earlier in the evening, but when she began to feel her stomach churning, she need only pay him a furrow of her brows in pain and he was more than happy to allow her rest if she needed it.
He was willing to carry her even, excuse himself from the celebrations himself. But she reassured him she was still able to walk, with a small, amused smile.
Even with the conqueror's crown planted firmly upon his head, all he could think of was the sweet curve of his wife's body in his. How warm she is. How smooth her skin. How plush her thighs. How tight her—
“Your Grace.”
Aemond blinked, swallowing thickly as he felt his breeches tighten at the mere tangent his mind was about to embark upon. Nothing softened him faster than the sight of Ser Tyland Lannister though, smug and stood tall as if he himself had been crowned instead of him.
“I wish to congratulate you on your Regency. As always your council will remain steadfast and trustworthy. And should you ever desire a Hand—”
“Thank you, Ser Tyland,” Aemond half-smiled, half-grimaced, “your loyalty is appreciated.”
Aemond nodded curtly to Ser Tyland, signalling the conversation was over, though the Lannister lingered a moment too long for Aemond’s liking before finally bowing and stepping away. 
His good eye drifted across the festivities. Everyone was drunk at best, smiles too wide, laughter too hollow, and he was overcome with the sudden desire to leave it all behind. He glanced in his mother’s direction as he pushed his chair out, her brown eyes wide with curiosity and judgement perhaps. 
She had given him no other look since Rook’s Rest.
“I believe they’ve seen enough of me tonight,” Aemond said, his tone firm. “The realm will not crumble if its Regent retires an hour early.”
“Aemond–”
“Mother,” he interrupted, his voice low but final.
It was only in the hall where he felt he could finally breathe. Air flowed easily, no longer stifled by the pomp and proper of the evening he had just sought to leave. He opened the heavy door to their chambers and stepped inside. The fire had burned low and she was already in bed, lying on her side, her hair spilling over the pillow.
“You left early,” he said quietly, closing the door behind him.
Her eyes opened slowly, and a small smile curved her lips. “And yet you followed.”
As he reached the bed, she shifted to sit up, the blanket pooling around her waist. “I thought you’d stay longer. Your mother will have words, I’m sure.”
“She always does,” he replied, sitting on the edge of the bed. His hand reached out to brush a strand of hair from her face. “Are you feeling unwell?”
Her gaze dropped for a moment, her fingers grazing her stomach in that way that had haunted him all evening. “No,” she said softly. “Just…tired.”
He hummed, “when will the maesters give their opinion?”
She looked up at him then, her expression caught somewhere between apprehension and hope. “They said it would be unwise to speculate for a few more weeks,” she replied. “But I am aware patience is not your strong suit, is it?”
He smirked faintly. “It is not.”
“You’ve waited for so much, Aemond,” she said softly, her voice warm and soothing, eyes glancing up at the conqueror’s crown sat atop his head. “A little longer won’t harm you.”
“Hm,” he murmurs, crawling over the bed towards her delicate form, pressing his face to her stomach with his hands on her hips, “spare me, dear wife. Have the maesters forbade coupling? I do not think I can wait.”
Her fingers threaded through his hair as she let out a soft laugh. “No,” she said, “but we must be careful. They warned against anything too…strenuous. Until we know for certain.”
“I am no beast,” he muffled against her shift, bunching it up as if desperate to touch her flesh, “I know restraint.”
“I seem to recall differently,” she countered with a teasing lilt.
With a hand to his chest, she pushes him back, enough to be able to straddle his lap as he sits with his back against the bed frame. For a moment his pupil widened slightly and she relished in the warm pride that spread through her at his reaction. 
She wasted no time. Unlacing his breeches was the simple part, but in this position, face to face, it was novel and intimate, more than usual. It was always Aemond on top, commanding her body to his. She wasn't sure how her husband was likely to cope with the change.
His breath hitched, eye closing as she pulled his cock free and worked him to full hardness, her slight palm massaging the ruddy tip, knowing what he liked. He was surely about to speak before she rose her hips, and the tip of him kissed her waiting slit, and slowly, slowly took her husband to the hilt.
Her movements were slow, deliberate, her hands braced against his chest as she guided them both into a steady rhythm. Aemond’s hands gripped her hips, his fingers pressing into her flesh as he resisted the urge to take control. He let her lead, his lips parting as a low groan escaped him.
“Ābrazȳrys” his voice caught, his eye blazing as he gazed up at her. “You are perfection.”
She leaned forward, her fingers threading through his silver hair, and pressed her lips to his. The dark crown brushed her fingertips, and in her annoyed breath, she slipped it from his head onto the bed. An action only the wife of the Prince Regent in this intimate moment would ever get away with.
Their breaths mingled, their shared movements growing more heated, more desperate. It felt good to roll her hips against him, each slide home was easy, aided by her unending desire to please him. But soon, she began to slow, the strain in her thighs becoming too much.
Her brows furrowed, her rhythm faltering as she let out a shaky breath. “Aemond.”
He must have felt the shake, as he was already moving her off his lap, “enough. Allow me.”
He guided her off him carefully, laying her down on her side before helping her onto her hands and knees. She looked over her shoulder, her eyes wide, and for a moment, uncertainty flickered across her face.
Her cheeks burned as he pulled the shift over her backside, pulling her legs apart so he might see the wetness that glazed her womanhood. She felt exposed and utterly at his mercy in such a compromising position.
Not to mention, this was uncharted territory.
“We’ve never…” she began, her voice trailing off.
Aemond smirked, his fingers trailing down her spine. “No,” he murmured, his tone low, “but we will now.”
He positioned himself behind her, and watched with curiosity and admiration, as for from this angle, he was able to watch himself disappear inside, swallowed by her silky walls. She gasped in turn, this was deeper than she had ever felt him, with her spine curved and backside held against him. Her fingers clutched the sheets as his pace began slow enough, before his restraint began to ebb away.
“Alright?” he rasped, leaning forward to press kisses along her shoulder, his voice rough with both pleasure and concern.
Her hips instinctively pushed back, “don't stop…”
Her approval shocked him, but ignited his confidence all the same as he began to push into her with renewed vigour. She was surprised at how much she liked it, the way he fit against her, the way his hands held her so firmly. It felt raw, intimate, and utterly consuming.
His hands slid up to her waist as he felt her peak quiver through her body, her walls spasming around him and in the force of it, her arms gave out and she pressed her front to the sheets. She swore she felt the palm of his hand on her lower stomach, stroking lovingly as he reached his, pushing hot, pearly ropes of his release so much inside her, that she felt it dribble down her thigh.
Aemond helped her shift onto her side, gathering her into his arms as they both caught their breath. His hand instinctively returned to her stomach, his thumb brushing over the soft skin in slow, soothing circles.
“You will let me know once the maesters give their opinion, won’t you?”
“Of course,” she replied, leaning into him. “But tonight, you are Prince Regent. Let us celebrate that.”
Aemond shook his head, his lips curling into a rare, genuine smile. His gaze softened as he looked at her, his wife, who had managed to calm the storm in him more times than he cared to admit.
“Tonight, I am your husband. Nothing else matters.”
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General Taglist: @1lluminaticonfirmed @aemondsfavouritebastard @all-for-aemond @bellstwd @blackswxnn
@blairfox04 @buckybarnesb-tch @castellomargot @cl-0-vr @eddieslut69
@emmaisafictionwhore @eponaartemisa @hb8301 @jamespotterismydaddy @justbelljust
@minholy223 @mochi-rose @natty2017 @nenelysian @nixiefics
@primonizzutto @qyburnsghost @randomdragonfires @risefallrise @sheshellsseashells
536 notes · View notes
argonautsoul · 2 days ago
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“Oh, to be able to be admired, cared for, loved, without needing to do any other thing than existing. No need to fight. Just to care, and nourish one and each other...”
Love isn’t something you feel, though. It’s something you do. And so,
loving someone is loving who they are.
When people feel that they are not understood, it frequently is due to not enough empathy going both ways...
[Text ID: “I would have preferred if you had loved me less and understood me more.”]
Here, one is actually saying: “I was in love with the fantasy relationship I wanted him/her to give me, but s/he wasn't offering me that; (I didn't like the way s/he was treating me)”.
Whatever you understand about your partner is your perspective. It is not what s/he really is. Whatever you attribute to your partner is in relation to you.
True love is based on accepting each other as they are... and you can't love something that you actually don't like... you can't love the other one if you don't actually enjoy the way s/he makes you feel.
Preferences are more about us than the other person, so first, try to give yourself what you are seeking from your date or partner.
Love isn't about trying to change someone to fit our idea of perfect.
What's more,
Forever, one can not fully understand the other one at all. This is the beauty of how they were created. Therefore, there is conflict between them.
Even within ourselves, there are/can be some deep-seated subconscious behaviours and beliefs that we don’t understand.
It is about accepting the whole person, even the parts you don't fully understand or agree with.
People's personalities change and grow over time. As you go through life together, you'll see new sides of each other. True love allows for that growth and accepts the ever-changing nature of your partner, even as their outer personality shifts. 
Any relationship is in a state of change, part of which is continuous knowledge of the other.
“Love isn’t a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.”
 — Fred Rogers
And hence, constant effort is needed to accept and adjust themselves to keep up with the changing lifestyles along the way with the changing society.
It takes time to grow together. And we want the maturity in a relationship that comes with time, the emotional connect that develops over years, that sense of belonging when we barely even know the other person... Apparently, nothing is worth our time, effort, and patience. Not even love. Relationships, however, require energy and participation.
Cognitive biases can be particularly damaging because they distort our perceptions and interpretations of our partners' actions and motives.
Cognitive bias is so difficult to acknowledge, understand, or be aware of within ourselves because we actively protect our beliefs. Sometimes, this means denying truth or new information that comes to us (a la cognitive dissonance).
In addition,
Depressed people don’t have the energy, and if they are caught up in the very common mode of isolation because of their depression they are definitely not participating... sometimes, there is an element of mental illness involved in this arena in general.
Lastly,
We don't really need an intellectual twin who can finish our sentences.
And that level of interconnection isn’t necessary. As long as they treat you appropriately, even if they don’t understand you completely, you can still have a very fulfilling relationship.
Love is a commitment, not about the mushy gushy feelings.
Let the commitment be the beginning of understanding. 
══════☸☸☸══════
Too often, in this culture, we cloud the picture, overanalyze, fear those conscious efforts, and insist that love means something very definable and ultimately acceptable — don’t get sucked into the madness, stay in your true path and please, please find a partner who is similar to you (i.e., hold similar values), who cares about your thoughts and feelings, and genuinely enjoys your company.
And read “The 5 Love Languages” by Gary Chapman. It’s eye-opening to realize that someone may be figuratively shouting their love from the rooftops — but you aren’t “hearing” it. Communication is key, as long as you understand your partner’s language.
.
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Margarita Karapanou, tr. by Karen Emmerich, from Rien ne va plus
[Text ID: “I would have preferred if you had loved me less and understood me more.”]
21K notes · View notes
woniedarlin · 3 days ago
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Two of a Kind
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pairing: Soft! Jungwon x Soft fem! reader
synopsis: Everyone knows that Jungwon has a pure and innocent heart. So, when he’s seen with a female version of himself—everyone’s left wondering how the universe can handle two of them.
author's note: This was never planned to be written, but here we are! Happy reading ✨
caution: They cry over EVERYTHING. Cute moments? Tears. Sweet gestures? More tears. If you’re not ready for this emotional overload, proceed with caution!
permanent tag list: @sol3chu @chlorinecake @13tter @jung1w0n
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Jungwon was already known as the school’s most admired guy. He is polite, sweet, and with a smile that could melt hearts. But when you entered his life, everything changed. You were his perfect match: just as adorable, just as innocent, and just as over-the-top with emotions.
Your relationship quickly became legendary—not because of drama or fights, but because of how unapologetically cute you were together…. and perhaps a little dramatic… or maybe a lot…
One day during lunch, you sat across from Jungwon, absentmindedly tying your hair into a loose ponytail. Jungwon, however, had gone completely still. He sat with his spoon mid-air, staring at you like he’d just seen the most astonishing sight in the world. His eyes grew wide, his lips parted slightly, and his cheeks flushed pink.
Finally, you looked up, meeting his gaze. “What?” you asked, tilting your head in confusion.
Jungwon’s lips quivered as he let out the softest sniffle. “You’re… you’re so beautiful, it hurts,” he said, his voice cracking.
You blinked, caught off guard. “What are you—”
Before you could finish your sentence, you noticed his eyes glistening.
Actual tears. Forming.
“Jungwon!” you gasped, setting down your chopsticks and reaching across the table to grab his hand. “Why are you crying?”
“I don’t deserve you!” he wailed, covering his face with his free hand. His shoulders shook dramatically as he buried his head in his arms. “You’re too perfect!”
You stared at him, your mouth opening and closing in disbelief. For a moment, you were too stunned to react, but then it hit you—his words, tears, ridiculous sincerity.
“Oh no,” you muttered under your breath, feeling your own emotions welling up. “You’re so adorable, I can’t handle this!’’ To Jungwon’s shock, tears began streaming down your face, too. You clutched his hand tighter and sniffled loudly. “How are you even real? It’s not fair!”
Now, the two of you were full-on crying in the middle of the cafeteria, heads bowed and hands clasped together. Jungwon suddenly wiped his eyes and stood up. “I love you so much, I just—” His voice cracked, and he sat down again, clutching his chest dramatically like he couldn’t handle his emotions anymore.
You hiccupped through your tears, nodding at him. “Me too. I can’t—how are you so sweet?!”
The two of you returned to crying, oblivious to the whispers and amused stares around you. Your untouched plates of food sat forgotten on the table.
When the moment passed, and you finally calmed down, your eyes were red and puffy, and your hands were still clasped tightly together. Jungwon sniffled one last time, giving you a watery smile. “I just… I love you.”
You giggled through your sniffles, squeezing his hand. “I love you too.”
“They’re either the cutest couple ever or just plain insane,” someone whispered.
“Yeah, they’re definitely insane.”
But neither of you noticed—or cared.
🌷
One afternoon, your best friend floated an idea to have a double date with her boyfriend. You and Jungwon were immediately on board—how hard could it be? Except…neither of you realized that a double date was required…
Actual planning.
When the four of you arrived at the amusement park, things fell apart almost instantly. “Wait, you didn’t bring the tickets?” your friend’s boyfriend asked, his tone hovering between exasperation and disbelief.
Jungwon scratched the back of his neck, his sheepish smile doing nothing to hide the truth. “Uh… I thought you’d bring them,” he mumbled, glancing at you for backup.
You gasped, your eyes wide. “Me? I thought you’d bring them!”
The two of you exchanged horrified looks, realizing you had managed to mess up before the date even began. Your best friend sighed and pulled her wallet from her bag. “You two are so lucky you’re cute, or I’d leave you outside,” she muttered, going to the ticket booth to purchase tickets. Again.
🌷
After the amusement park fun, you and Jungwon found yourselves in an unexpectedly quiet corner of the park, your friends nowhere in sight. The two of you blinked around at the crowd, completely lost.
“Uh, where’d they go?” you asked, your voice confused.
Jungwon looked around, his eyes wide and innocent. “I thought we were just following them…”
You both turned in a full circle, eyes darting around as if someone might suddenly emerge from the crowd with a map or a sign that said, “This way to your friends!”
“I think… we might be lost,” you said, peering over at Jungwon, your brows furrowing.
Jungwon blinked back at you, his expression clueless. He had those big, boba eyes, “You think so?”
The two of you continued to look around, but it felt like the world was spinning in a dizzying blur, making it impossible to tell where anyone had gone. You caught sight of a hot dog cart and paused.
“Maybe we should just… get some snacks?” you suggested, still feeling a little lost but okay with it.
Jungwon’s eyes lit up at the mention of food. “Good idea! You know, I read somewhere that getting snacks makes everything better.”
You grinned at his enthusiasm, and together, you walked over to the cart, still holding hands. “Do you think we’ll ever find them?” you asked, tilting your head.
He nodded confidently (even though he had no idea where they were.) “Of course! We have snacks now. We’ll be okay.”
You both nodded as you shared a bite of your snack, still standing in the middle of a busy crowd, clueless but happy to be lost together. As you were about to ask him if he thought your friends would ever return, you heard a familiar voice behind you.
“There you are!” Your best friend waved at you both, laughing.
You and Jungwon turned around, blinking like two confused children, both of you still holding hands.
“Did you guys seriously just get lost?” she teased, looking between you two.
You both looked at each other, “I think so,” Jungwon said with a little shrug.
You then showed the food. “But we found snacks!”
Your friends laughed, but the two of you didn’t mind. Being lost wasn’t so bad when you had each other.
🌷
As you and Jungwon continued walking through the amusement park, your attention was momentarily caught by a man who passed by, looking incredibly well put together.
You glanced at him, a little shocked by how tall he was. Woah ( •͈૦•͈ )
Before you could say anything, Jungwon suddenly stopped in his tracks. His eyes widened as he quickly turned toward you, a flustered expression spreading across his face.
“W-what’s wrong?” you asked, slightly concerned.
Then…with no warning….
Jungwon spread his arms in front of you, practically blocking your view. “Don’t look! Don’t look at him!” he said, his arms wide as if trying to block out the entire world—especially the man walking ahead.
You blinked, completely confused at first. “What? Why? He’s just a guy…”
“No!” Jungwon’s face turned a bright shade of red. “He’s a man! A man! And you… you can’t look at him!”
“But Jungwon, it’s not like I—”
“No!” Jungwon interrupted, his eyes still fixed on you. “I’m the only man you should look at!” He pointed to himself dramatically, puffing out his chest
ᕙ( •̀ ᗜ •́ )ᕗ
“Are you seriously…?” you started to say, but then Jungwon’s expression made it even harder to stay serious.
“I’m serious!” he said with an exaggerated nod, keeping his arms outstretched. “I will protect you from all other men! You have no reason to look at anyone else!”
You giggled and stepped forward, warmly hugging him, “Only you.”
Jungwon smiled shyly, his arms slowly lowering as he hugged you back. “I’m just trying to protect my pretty girl.”
“Well, I appreciate it,” you said, grinning. “But I think I’m fine.”
He gave you a bashful smile. “I’ll be your shield forever.” Oh, Jungwon…
🌷
The only time you and Jungwon ever argued was over the silliest things.
Case in point: your 1st anniversary.
Jungwon showed up at your door, practically bouncing on his heels, his hands hidden behind his back. “Close your eyes!” he said, barely containing his excitement.
You laughed but did as you were told. “Okay, okay. They’re closed!”
After a moment of shuffling, he whispered, “Open them!”
When you did, your eyes fell on the cutest handmade pottery mug you’d ever seen!! (˃̣̣̥ᯅ˂̣̣̥)
“Surprise!” Jungwon said, grinning from ear to ear. “I made it myself in pottery class. See? It even has little hearts on it!” He held it out, his eyes shining with pride.
Your jaw dropped, your heart instantly melting at his effort. “You’re kidding,” you whispered, taking the mug from him. “You made this for me?”
Jungwon nodded enthusiastically. “Of course! I wanted to make something special for you.”
You stared at the mug. Then, with a gasp, you set it down and reached behind you. “But I was going to surprise you first!”
From your bag, you pulled out your gift: a scrapbook stuffed with pictures of the two of you, each page decorated with stickers, doodles, and handwritten notes. It was a labor of love you’d poured hours into creating.
Jungwon blinked at the scrapbook, then at you. His expression shifted from pride to confusion. “Wait…what?”
You crossed your arms. “I spent weeks working on this! I was supposed to surprise you!”
“But, baby,” Jungwon whined, “you can’t just out-surprise my surprise!”
You raised an eyebrow. “Excuse me? You’ll find that my scrapbook beats your wobbly little mug any day!”
“Wobbly?” Jungwon gasped dramatically, clutching his chest as if you’d mortally wounded him. “How dare you insult my craftsmanship! Do you know how hard it was to make that? I burned my hand on the kiln for you!”
You snorted. “Well, I stayed up three nights in a row cutting and pasting pictures, thank you very much!”
Jungwon’s eyes narrowed. “Alright, then. Let’s settle this. Who’s the better gift-giver? Me, with my heartfelt mug of love, or you, with your scrapbook of sentimental memories?”
“Obviously me,” you said, pointing your tongue at him.
He huffed, crossing his arms. “Fine. But I hope you know I’m keeping this scrapbook because it’s adorable.”
“And I’m keeping the mug because it’s precious,” you replied, softening as you placed it on the table.
Jungwon dramatically sighed and stepped closer, wrapping his arms around you. “I guess we both won.”
“Yeah,” you murmured, smiling into his chest. “But next time, let’s coordinate surprises. Deal?”
“Deal,” he said, leaning back to look at you. Then he grinned. “But you have to admit—my mug is better.”
You swatted his shoulder. “Don’t push your luck, pottery boy.”
🌷
For Jungwon’s birthday, you decided to bake him chocolate cake all by yourself, even though baking wasn’t exactly your strong suit.
When you arrived at his house, you held the cake box before you. Jungwon opened the door with a bright grin, but his expression softened into something almost reverent when he saw the box. “You… you made me a cake?” he asked, his voice soft with awe.
You nodded, suddenly shy. “It’s not perfect, but—”
“Let me see it!” He eagerly took the box, carefully opening it. His mouth dropped open when he laid eyes on the slightly uneven yet undeniably adorable cake.
“It’s so cute,” he whispered, his voice cracking.
You blinked, worried. “You think so? I know it’s a little messy, but—”
“It’s perfect,” Jungwon cut you off, his bottom lip trembling. “You made this for me. With your own hands. For me.” He looked at you, his eyes glistening like he was about to cry. Before you could react, he gently set the cake down on the table and hugged you tightly, burying his face in your shoulder.
“It’s perfect because you made it,” he murmured, his voice muffled and shaky.
“Wonie, don’t cry,” you said, laughing softly, even as you felt your own eyes start to sting. “It’s just a cake.”
“But you’re so thoughtful, and I don’t deserve you,” he said dramatically, pulling back just enough to look at you with tear-filled eyes.
That was it. Your heart couldn’t take it. He was too adorable and too sweet.
Before you knew it, tears were welling up in your eyes, too.
“You don’t deserve me?” you countered, sniffling. “What about you? You’re the sweetest, most precious person ever! How are you real?”
Jungwon blinked at you, his eyes wide and shiny. “Are you crying now?”
“I can’t help it!” you wailed softly. “You’re too cute!”
The two of you ended up crying (again) in his kitchen, this time over a cake. His mom walked in, looked at the scene, and sighed. “You two are hopelessly adorable,” she said, shaking her head and walking away. Her son really found his match.
🌷
Days later, as you and Jungwon walked home together, he suddenly stopped and turned to you. His expression was serious. “I have something to tell you,” he said, trembling.
You immediately panicked. “What is it? Did I do something wrong?”
“No!” he exclaimed. “It’s just… I love you so much, and sometimes I wonder if I’ll ever be good enough for you.”
Your heart melted instantly. “wonie, don’t be silly. I love you more than anything.”
He blinked at you, his cheeks flushing. “You mean it?”
“Of course!” you said. “But wait—did you stop me just to tell me that?”
Jungwon scratched his head sheepishly. “Well, I was also going to ask if you wanted to go to the new ice cream shop with me. But it sounded more romantic in my head.”
Laughing, you grabbed his hand. “Yes, dummy. I’ll go with you.”
Later, as you both shared a giant ice cream sundae, Jungwon suddenly sniffled and started tearing up again.
“wonie, now what?” you asked, half-laughing as you handed him a napkin.
“I’m just so happy,” he sniffled, his big boba eyes shining with tears. “You’re too perfect, it’s unfair.”
You blinked at him, your heart swelling. “Why are you crying?!”
“I don’t deserve you!” he wailed, covering his face with his hands, shoulders trembling slightly.
That’s when your tears started to form. “No, stop—don’t cry!”
“But—”
“Now you’re making me cry!” you interrupted, wiping your eyes with your sleeves as tears spilled over.
Jungwon peeked at you through his fingers, looking genuinely alarmed. “Wait, why are you crying?”
“Because you’re crying!” you sniffled. “And you’re too adorable; it’s not fair.”
Jungwon, despite his tears, suddenly let out a soft laugh. “This is ridiculous,” he muttered, reaching for another napkin and gently dabbing at your tears.
You hiccupped through your giggles, overseeing him dry your cheeks, only for him to realize he was still crying. “We’re hopeless,” you whispered, sniffling again.
Jungwon nodded solemnly. “Hopelessly in love.”
Jungwon paused, looked at you with that soft, adorable gaze, and leaned closer.
“Come here,” he murmured.
Before you could say anything, he pressed a long, gentle kiss to your lips. It was so soft and sweet that it fluttered your heart wildly in your chest.
You pulled back, wide-eyed, but grinning like an idiot. “wonie, you have ice cream on your lips.”
“Do I?” he asked innocently, licking his lips. “Must be from you then.”
You gasped, smacking his arm lightly as he laughed, clearly pleased with himself.
Who knew that two people so alike could be this cute together?
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scarletemeterio · 3 days ago
Note
Hello! Can I ask for ekko with an reader who confessed to him thrice (and thrice rejected) and then he finally falls hard for them? With a happy ending, thank you!
(kind of like she fell first he fell harder trope)
Let Me Love You (Ekko x Reader)
Warnings: some cursing Genre: angst, hurt/comfort Word count: 2.3k Reader has no set pronouns!
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The first time was the hardest of them all. You’d muster up the courage to confess your feelings for him, knowing very well that it could go south.
“I have something to tell you,” you uttered. He gave you a worried look, noticing that there was a hint of desperation in your voice. You were in his so-called office, working on something that didn’t really matter anymore.
“Is everything okay?” He simply asked.
“I’m not sure,” you began, “but I really need to say this.” He gave you his full attention, making you feel a bit intimidated by him and extremely self-conscious. “I’m in love with you,” you blurted out.
Silence quickly filled the room, and the tension could easily be cut by a knife. The moment you saw his face, you knew it: he didn’t feel the same way.
“I, uh, I don’t know what to say,” he mumbled more to himself than to you.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make things awkward at all. You can just forget I said anything.”
“I really don’t want to hurt you but I just don’t feel the same way.” You were trying to hold back your tears as his words left his mouth. “You’re an amazing person and anyone would be lucky to be with you, but that person isn’t me.”
You simply looked at him and slowly nodded. “It’s okay, you can’t force yourself to feel something you don’t.” It was hard to speak at this point. He knew you were hurt, but you’d never show it; it would just make things harder for the both of you. “Is this gonna change things between us?”
“I would hate that, honestly.” You nodded again, finally being on the same page about something. He came closer and put a reassuring hand on your shoulder to try and alleviate the tension. If only it were that easy.
•••
Some time passed and you still tried to hide your feelings for him. For a while, it worked, you’d suppressed them every time you spent time with the boy but deep down, you missed the way you were before. It had always been hard for you to open up to people, but you’d never been this miserable before. You were just a shadow of your usual self, and it was evident to everyone in the base.
Ekko himself tried to talk to you about it, clearly oblivious to the fact that he was the reason for your attitude. Finally, after a particularly hard day for you, you just lost it.
“You wanna know what’s wrong with me, Ekko? It’s you!” You truly didn’t mean to scream at him but you also couldn’t help it. Lately, you lived on edge, always frustrated about something; it was like you were a bomb simply waiting to explode. “I swear I tried to play dumb, to ignore everything but I just can’t.”
“Is this about-?”
“Yes, Ekko, of course it is.” You interrupted him. “I know you went on with your life and pretended I never said anything so we could go back to the way things were, but it’s not that easy for me. Nothing about this has been easy.”
“I didn’t know you felt that way.”
“Bullshit,” you spat. “You know exactly how I feel about you. We’ve known each other for years, you can’t tell me you never realized why I’ve been acting so strange.”
There was a pause between you. You were agitated, heart beating so fast that you could feel it in your throat. “I guess I wanted to pretend nothing ever happened,” he confessed after some time. “Acknowledging it made it real and I just- I just want my friend back, without any messiness and complications between us.”
“Oh, I’m sorry, Ekko. I’m sorry my feelings are such an inconvenience to you. Trust me, I wish I could change them and forget about you for good but I just can’t.”
Something twitched inside of him when you said that and he looked at you with hurt eyes. “You really mean that? That you’d like to forget me?”
“I meant forgetting about my feelings for you, ‘cause you’re not making things easy for me,” you explained. “When you come over and put your arm around me or stand so close to me that I can feel you breathing it kills me, Ekko. And the worst part is that you know it.” You took a deep breath, anger slowly leaving you, feeling nothing but sadness. “Sometimes I feel like you enjoy testing me like that because you know that no matter what I’ll always come back to you. But I’m tired of this dance between us, it’s too much.”
“I just don’t know how to feel! This is hard for me too!” Neither of you cared if someone heard you at this point, you’d simply have to put up with the weird looks from everyone. “I don’t know what you want me to do and I’m confused.”
“Honestly,” you began, “I want you to give me some space.”
“Wait, I- uh, I don’t want that, please,” he took a step closer to you, trying to grab ahold of your hand but you avoided his touch, as you avoided his sad eyes.
“Do you have feelings for me, Ekko?”
“I said I’m confused.”
“It’s a simple question, do you?”
You finally looked at him and he realized that you were crying. He could count with one hand the number of times he’d seen you cry, and he never thought he’d be the reason why. “I don’t know,” he finally whispered.
“Then I don’t have anything else to say. I don’t want to wait for you to figure out how you feel and keep getting hurt in the process, I don’t think I deserve it.”
“Wait, please-.”
“Ekko,” you cut him, “I need some space, don’t make this even harder, please.” And with that, you left, leaving him even more confused than before, and with a pain in his chest he couldn’t really explain.
You should’ve known this was coming. Still, it hurt like the first time. You couldn’t blame him; if anything, you were glad he was honest with you. But after today, you realized that you needed to keep some distance from him, or this would end up destroying you for good.
•••
Days quickly turned into weeks, and you realized you hadn’t said a word to the Firelight’s leader in almost a month. Your heart still flipped inside whenever you inevitably ran into him or locked eyes with him within the first few days since the fight, and soon you started avoiding him all along.
In no time, the boy started feeling an emptiness inside him, something he couldn’t explain. He was truthful with you in that last conversation, he truly wasn’t sure how he felt, but with every passing day that you were nowhere to be seen, he realized that maybe he’d been a complete fool.
He missed you, there was no denying that. Now the question was if his feelings for you were simply platonic or if deep down he yearned for you, maybe even more than you for him. Ekko wasn’t the best with his emotions, not because he actively repressed them, but because all of this was extremely new to him, and he just felt so overwhelmed. However, there was one thing he was extremely sure of: he wanted you in his life.
It had been days since he last saw you, evident now that you’d been avoiding him for a while, so when he finally caught a glimpse of you around the base, it was like seeing an angel. Soon, his pleasant feelings were replaced by envy. You were talking with one of the new members from the Firelights, nothing out of the ordinary, but there was nothing he wanted more than to be the one you had your attention on. He didn’t recognize himself, filled with jealousy and bitterness.
The boy was pulled out of his thoughts when someone asked him a question, engaging in conversation with him, but that strange sensation still clung to him like glue. He hated himself and blamed his stupid ass for being such an idiot, these were merely the consequences of his own actions.
When he was lying in bed that night trying to fall asleep, you were the only thing on his mind. Your smile that shined like the stars, your lips that he so wanted to feel against his own while your arms wrapped around his body. He wanted to bang his head against the wall, he was such an idiot. If only he’d realized this before then maybe now you wouldn’t hate him. It all seemed so obvious to him now. You were there for him, by his side from the very beginning. He could always count on and lean on you, he trusted you even more than he trusted himself. Oftentimes he’d become mesmerized by how pretty you looked when you spent time together, the sun hitting your face in just the perfect way or your hair effortlessly framing your face in such a flawless way. Of course, he thought nothing of all this at the time, brushing it off as objective thinking. But now, it suddenly hit him, everything was different now because he wasn’t unsure anymore, he knew exactly how he felt about you. He loved you.
He sat on his bed, passing his hands through his face in an attempt to clear his mind. He wanted- no, needed to talk to you. Maybe you didn’t even feel the same way anymore, but he had to get it off his chest, he had to at least try. But right now, he also had to calm his nerves because if he didn’t, he’d go and knock on your door this very moment, and he was certain you didn’t wanna see him at all. So instead, he got up and went to take a walk, thinking it would be nice to sit by the tree to help him organize his thoughts. What he wasn’t expecting was seeing you there.
As soon as you saw his figure making its way to you, you got up, ready to leave but were interrupted by his voice. “Wait, please, don’t go.” You knew you should pay him no attention and leave anyway, but it had been so long since you’d last heard his voice that you were taken aback for a moment, standing in place. “Can we talk?” His voice was soft, nothing compared to what it was in your last conversation together; you could even hear a hint of desperation, which was what ultimately made you turn around and stay.
“What do you want, Ekko?” As soon as he heard you he let out a small smile, confirming that yours was the voice he wanted to hear every day when he woke up and every night before going to sleep.
He motioned for you to sit down again, doing the same right after you. “I’m sorry for everything,” he began saying, “I never meant for things to end up like this between us.” His chest accompanied his breathing, moving just a little too fast, earning him a concerned look from you. “I know that you probably hate me now, I know I would if I were you, and you’ll probably hate me even more after what I have to say since I acted like a complete idiot and took so long to figure out something that was right in front of me this whole time but I- uh, I do have feelings for you. Lots of feelings actually, I’m in love with you.”
You snapped your neck to look at him, trying to read his expression in search of a playful tone, but it wasn’t there. He was serious, he was finally saying what you wanted to hear for so long now. So long that you couldn’t fully believe him.
“Ekko, I don’t want any games, please.”
“I’m being serious. These weeks without you have been absolute torture, I can’t do this without you, I need you.” He rubbed his face, stopping at the bridge of his nose to pinch it. When he looked back at you, he had tears forming in his eyes, a sight you hadn’t seen in a very long time. “I’m being honest. I’m so sorry it took me so long to finally realize it. I made it my personal vow to always protect you and keep you safe and I’m the one that caused you pain and for that, I’m so sorry.”
You didn’t really know what to say, nothing seemed good enough. Your mind was racing and quickly you were lost in your thoughts and were brought back to reality by the sound of Ekko getting up, ready to leave. “These last weeks have been hell for me, too.” Your eyes met his and you stoop up, getting closer to him. “I don’t hate you, Ekko. I could never hate you.”
“But you don’t love me anymore?”
“I didn’t say that, I’m just a bit taken aback that’s all.” He got closer to you, trying to grab your hand and this time, you let him do it. He brought it to his face and planted a kiss on it, never breaking eye contact with you.
“I’m so in love with you that just thinking about spending a second away from you makes me suffer. I don’t want to feel that way anymore, I want to be with you, share my life with you, and love you every day.” One of his hands went to cup your face and you leaned against it. “Please let me love you.”
You looked at his lips and then back at his eyes, and in just a second the air was knocked out of your lungs when you felt his lips against yours. The kiss was sweet but desperate and filled with emotions. “Please let me love you, too,” you said when you separated.
“Nothing would make me happier.”
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hey! i loved this request, i'm a sucker for angst :)
i changed it just a little bit but i still hope you like it anon, thanks for requesting! really enjoyed writing this one and i LOVE writing for ekko
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unpopularly-opinionated · 2 days ago
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Almost every week, for the last maybe 2-2 1/2 years or so, I (27) have been going out to different bars with the same group of people, all of whom are at least twice my age or more and I honestly couldn’t recommend it more for younger people.
I mean to get the bad aspects out of the way upfront, I did (and sometimes still do) have a minor insecurity about being the “annoying child of someone in the group that everyone has to pretend to tolerate”. My stepdad is the one who initiated the hangouts originally, and I initially was just tagging along for free food and booze. No one’s ever done anything to make me feel that way mind you, they are always SUPER accommodating, almost too much sometimes. Sometimes they’ll straight up change topics if they’ve noticed I checked out because I wasn’t interested in what they were talking about. It’s just my own irrational insecurity that crops up from time to time. I also struggle sometimes with explaining this friendship to other people, often referring to them as “my stepdad’s friends” even though we’ve been out together so many times that I could and should very reasonably consider them my friends too. Again, this is a me thing, nothing against them.
We started out doing it with a purpose, we were doing bar trivia every week and having a blast. But over time, we grew kinda bored of the trivia, the format kinda changed, and it started pretty late into the evening, and we ultimately just realized that we actually were just cool hanging out and chatting without needing to have an excuse to be there.
But being the youngest among them, I just find them very interesting to talk to. They’re always talking about their jobs, the good, the bad, and the ugly of them all. Most of them are managers of several people, and they’re the type of managers who care more about their employees than the businesses, so I always feel like I’m hearing a fair assessment of whether an employee is being completely insane, or if the company is screwing them over somehow, or what not. And just how the working world works from their perspective. Not to mention how they got to where they’re at. One went to college and has a masters, one went to college but dropped out and taught himself to code, another just worked his way up from the bottom to the top (yes, they all work in the tech industry lol).
This isn’t even mentioning the fact that my grandfather is there with us as well, and he’s retired now but he had been an electrician for 60+ years prior, and being the oldest of our group, he has like a whole extra generation’s worth of experience to add to the mix too. It’s really great because it kind of adds that extra layer that makes me feel more comfortable in the group (like yeah, I’m the clueless youth compared to most of these guys, but they’re all youths to him too).
I can’t really explain it too well, but I feel like I just absorb life experience by hanging out with this group of people. It’s not all just work talk either, they talk about their personal hobbies, trips they’ve been on or are going on, their kids, food, alcohol, sports, politics, lots of politics, social media nonsense, etc. No one ever gets worked up over things, even when talking politics.
TL;DR: I recommend befriending people much older than yourself. It’s not creepy or weird, and you could learn a lot, even if you might not think so. Just sitting there and absorbing it all I think would benefit a lot of younger people.
I need you people to realize that you can be friends with people older than you. like, much older than you. like, decades older than you. you can be friends with these people. regular friends, just like anyone your age. it is possible.
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lizziesangel · 2 days ago
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RAFE CAMERON - changes
x FEM!reader - MASTERLIST
SUMMARY: based on this request
WORD COUNT: +3.5k
GENRE: angsty
CONTENT WARNING: mentions of alcohol abuse!!
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rafe cameron’s transformation hadn’t been instant. it wasn’t like he woke up one day and decided to leave behind the drugs, the fights, and the reputation that shadowed him everywhere he went.
it was gradual—painful, even. he hit rock bottom when his father, had finally given up on him, staring him down with disappointment so heavy that it left rafe feeling like nothing. adding that to the constant whispers on the island, the mounting legal troubles, and his own body screaming for something—anything—to numb it all.
and then he met you.
it wasn’t love at first sight—nothing that neat. you weren’t the kind of person who’d fall for the version of rafe cameron he was back then, and he knew it. still, something about you made him try harder to keep your attention, even if it was just in small, fleeting moments. you didn’t seem afraid of him, but you weren’t charmed by the bad boy act either. that made you different.
you saw through him, though he didn’t realize it at first. the easy smirk he wore, the sharp edges to his personality—you didn’t buy into any of it. and for reasons he couldn’t explain, that only made him want you more.
at first, you were just a distraction from the chaos of his life. Aabright spot in the mess he couldn’t seem to untangle. but the more time he spent with you, the more he realized he wanted to be the version of himself you deserved—the version of himself he’d buried beneath years of anger and regret.
you didn’t push him to change. you didn’t lecture him or try to fix him. instead, you simply existed in his world, your quiet strength and warmth enough to make him question everything.
for a long time, rafe tried to balance it all: keeping you close while still sinking into the same destructive habits. but it became harder and harder to look you in the eye after a night of doing blow or waking up in a jail cell. he could see the worry in your expression, the disappointment you tried to hide. and though you never said the words outright, he could feel the weight of your silent plea: be better. you’re better than this.
the night everything changed was one he would never forget. you had stayed up waiting for him after one of his infamous benders. he came home bruised, reeking of alcohol, his eyes bloodshot and unfocused. you didn’t yell or cry. you simply asked, “how much longer do you think you can keep this up before it kills you?”
it wasn’t a threat or an ultimatum—it was a genuine question, asked in the softest voice he’d ever heard. and for the first time, he didn’t have an answer.
he wasn’t proud of how far gone he’d been. the cocaine, the countless nights drowning in whiskey, the explosive temper that dragged him into fights he’d barely remember starting. he’d been pushing away everyone who had ever cared about him, and for what? empty bottles, bleeding knuckles, and a rap sheet that could rival a career criminal’s
that was the moment rafe realized he didn’t want to lose you. and more importantly, he didn’t want to lose himself.
the road to redemption wasn’t easy. he stumbled more times than he cared to admit, but he kept going. for you, at first—but eventually, for himself too.
from that day on, rafe worked to pull himself out of the mess he’d created. it wasn’t easy. the withdrawal was brutal, the temptation constant. the whispers didn’t stop, and the pogues certainly didn’t forgive and forget overnight. but he stayed the course, because for the first time, he could see a future where he wasn’t defined by his worst moments.
what he didn’t see, as he fought to put himself back together, was the way you were starting to come undone.
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rafe had been too consumed by his own chaos to notice the way it was spilling over into your life. in those early days, you tried to be there for him, to anchor him, even as he self-destructed. but being close to rafe cameron back then meant standing too close to the fire. he didn’t mean to hurt you—he didn’t even realize he was doing it—but his recklessness burned everything in its path, including you.
there were nights when you’d wait for him, staring at the clock long past midnight, your stomach twisting with dread. was he passed out somewhere? in a fight? in jail? the worry gnawed at you, clawing deeper with every unanswered text and phone call.
and when he did come home, he wasn’t the person you knew he could be. he was drunk, high, and distant, his words slurred, his temper sharp. you tried to reach him, to remind him of the person he used to be, but it was like trying to hold water in your hands—it all slipped through your fingers.
the worst part wasn’t the yelling or the silences. it was the absence.
slowly, without realizing it, rafe had left you alone in a relationship that was supposed to be a partnership. you stopped counting the days between when he’d actually look at you, really see you. you were there, holding him up.
but no one was holding you.
at first, you told yourself it didn’t matter. you were strong; you could handle it. but cracks began to form, little fissures that grew wider with every broken promise and sleepless night. and in those moments, when the loneliness became unbearable, you turned to the only thing that seemed to quiet the ache: alcohol.
it started small—a glass of wine to help you sleep, a glass of vodka to steady your nerves. but as the nights dragged on and rafe stayed out later and later, one drink became two, then three, until you stopped counting altogether.
though the irony wasn’t lost on you. you were drowning yourself in the very thing that was destroying him. but at least when you were drunk, the pain didn’t feel so sharp, the nights didn’t feel so long, and the loneliness didn’t feel so suffocating.
rafe didn’t notice. how could he? he was too busy stumbling through his own haze of drugs and liquor to see the way you were crumbling. you both lived in the same house, but it felt like you were in different worlds—his world of chaos and yours of quiet despair.
by the time rafe began to claw his way out of his darkness, the damage had already been done. he was so focused on getting clean, on staying out of trouble, that he didn’t notice the way your hands trembled in the mornings or the way you poured your drinks a little too full at dinner.
you told yourself it was fine. he was trying to be better, and you didn’t want to burden him with your own problems. but deep down, you resented him for it—resented the way he seemed to be moving forward while you were still stuck, sinking deeper into a hole you didn’t know how to climb out of.
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for him it seemed to work. you were supportive, always cheering him on, always proud. but the more he healed, the more he started to notice things he hadn’t before. things about you.
the way your hands trembled when you reached for your coffee mug. the red-rimmed eyes that never seemed to fade, even after a full night’s rest. the way you poured yourself another glass of wine at dinner before you’d even finished the first.
and the smell. faint, but unmistakable. alcohol lingered on your breath, on your clothes. he knew the scent all too well.
the realization hit him like a punch to the gut. at first, he tried to brush it off, convinced he was overthinking. but the signs were there, clear as day. and tonight, as you reached for yet another glass of wine, he couldn’t keep quiet anymore.
“how much have you been drinking?”
the question hung in the air, heavy and unyielding.
you froze, your fingers tightening around the stem of your glass. “what?”
he leaned forward, his elbows on his knees, his brows furrowed in concern. “i’m serious, y/n. how much?”
you laughed, but it was hollow, bitter. “why does it matter?” you asked, taking a sip as if to prove a point.
“because i’m worried about you,” he said, his voice trembling slightly. “i’m not stupid. the glass is always full, there’s always another bottle. your hands shake in the morning, baby. i know the signs.”
you set the glass down with a sharp clink, your chest tightening. “don’t do this, rafe.”
“do what?” he asked, his tone still soft but laced with desperation. “care about you? ask what the hell’s going on? you think i don’t notice the way you’ve been slipping?”
and just like that, the dam burst. the emotions you’d been bottling up came flooding out in a rush of anger and sadness.
“you don’t get to judge me!” you snapped, your voice shaking. “not after everything. do you know how many nights i spent waiting for you to come home, praying you weren’t dead in a ditch somewhere? do you know what it’s like to watch someone you love destroy themselves and not be able to do a damn thing about it?”
rafe’s face crumpled, his guilt visible in every line. “i’m not judging you,” he said quietly. “i know what it’s like. i know how it feels to want to drown it all out, to make it stop.”
“no, you don’t,” you shot back, your voice breaking. “you don’t know how it feels to lose someone before they’re even gone. to... to feel like you’re screaming for help... but no one hears you because they’re too busy pulling themselves out of the mess they made!”
“angel,” rafe said, reaching for your hand, but you pulled back.
“i know i’m a hypocrite,” you continued, tears threatening to stream down your face. “i know i’m doing the same thing you did. and maybe i’m weak. maybe i’m pathetic!” sobs came out of you as you tried to form your words.
“but i needed you, rafe. i needed you, and you weren’t there! you were never there,” your voice cracked.
he flinched like you’d struck him, but he didn’t argue. he didn’t try to defend himself, because deep down, he knew you were right. “i wasn’t there,” he admitted, his voice thick with emotion. “i wasn’t. and i’ll never forgive myself for that. but i’m here now, and i’m begging you—please let me help you.”
you shook your head, anger and heartbreak swirling in your chest. “i don’t need your help, rafe. i don’t need you to fix me.”
he reached for you again, desperation written all over his face. “i’m not trying to fix you. i just—i love you. i can’t watch you go through this alone. please, angel, let me help.”
but you couldn’t. the pain, the anger—it was all too much. you stood abruptly, grabbing your coat.
“where are you going?” he asked, panic flashing in his eyes.
“out,” you said, your voice cold and final.
“please don’—”
“i can’t do this right now,” you cut him off, walking to the door. “i just—i need to breathe.”
rafe stood frozen, his heart pounding as he watched you slip on your shoes and grab your keys.
“baby, don’t go,” he said, his voice breaking.
“please, don’t leave like this.”
you didn’t look back. the door closed with a slam behind you, leaving rafe alone in the silence, his heart splintering into pieces.
but he didn’t try to wait. the moment the door closed behind you, he grabbed his jacket and followed, his heart pounding with equal parts fear and determination.
you were already halfway down the driveway when he caught up, your keys clenched tightly in your hand as you marched toward your car.
“y/n,” he called, his voice desperate, but you didn’t stop.
“just leave me alone, rafe,” you said, your tone sharp, though it cracked at the edges.
“i can’t do that, angel,” he said, quickening his pace until he was just a few steps behind you. “i’m not letting you walk away like this.”
you spun on your heel, your eyes blazing with a mix of anger and pain. “you don’t get to follow me,” you snapped. “you don’t get to tell me what to do, not after everything!”
he stopped in his tracks, holding his hands up like he was surrendering. “okay. fine. but at least let me drive you.”
you scoffed, turning back toward your car. “i don’t need you to drive me, i’m fine.”
“you’re not fine,” he said softly, his voice laced with concern. “you’ve been drinking. i can smell and see it. please, just—don’t do this. if you need to get away, i’ll take you. just let me drive.”
you hesitated, your hand on the car door. deep down, you knew he was right. the alcohol was still humming faintly in your veins, and the last thing you needed was to get pulled over or worse.
“i don’t need a babysitter,” you muttered, but you let the keys dangle loosely in your hand.
“i know you don’t,” he said, stepping closer, his voice gentle. “but i need to do this, okay? just—let me do this for you.”
“i need to know you’re safe.”
you looked at him, his face etched with a raw kind of desperation that made your chest ache. for a moment, you considered pushing him away again, but the exhaustion was too heavy, and the fight was slipping from your grasp.
“okay,” you said reluctantly, tossing him the keys. “but don’t talk to me.”
rafe nodded, catching the keys midair. “yeah, okay,” he said quietly.
you climbed into the passenger seat, crossing your arms and staring out the window as he slid into the driver’s seat. the silence between you was thick, heavy with unsaid words, but he didn’t press. he simply started the car and pulled out of the driveway.
as the streetlights blurred past, you pulled a flask from your coat pocket, unscrewing the lid with shaky hands.
“y/n, don’t,” rafe said softly, glancing over at you.
you ignored him, lifting the flask to your lips.
“please,” he said, his voice breaking. “i’m begging you. just—don’t.”
“it won’t help, it never will.”
your hand hovered midair, the weight of his words pressing down on you. for a moment, you hesitated, but the familiar ache in your chest won out. you tipped the flask back, the burn of the alcohol momentarily numbing the pain.
rafe gripped the steering wheel tighter, his knuckles white. he didn’t say anything else, but the hurt in his expression was unmistakable.
as the car sped down the road, the silence between you grew heavier, suffocating. rafe was struggling to keep himself together, but he knew one thing: no matter how far you tried to run, he wasn’t going to let you go through this alone.
the red and blue lights flashing in the rearview mirror brought rafe’s heart to his throat.
“shit,” he muttered, gripping the wheel tighter as he pulled the car to the side of the road.
you shifted uncomfortably in your seat, clutching the flask. “you were speeding, weren’t you?”
rafe’s jaw tightened. “yeah, i guess i was. just—stay quiet, alright?”
the flashlight beam hit the driver’s side window before either of you could say anything else. when rafe rolled it down, the familiar voice of shoupe made the tension in the car skyrocket.
“well, well, look who we have here,” shoupe said, leaning down to get a better look at rafe. his tone was casual, almost amused, but there was a sharp edge to it. “rafe cameron, speeding down my roads. what’s the rush tonight?”
rafe forced a tight smile, though the discomfort was written all over his face. “sorry, officer. i wasn’t paying attention to my speed. just trying to get my girl to a friends’ house,” he said, nodding toward you.
shoupe’s flashlight swept across the interior of the car, landing squarely on the flask in your lap.
“uh-huh,” shoupe nodded, his tone shifting as he focused on you. “and uh… what’s that? you two drinking and driving tonight?”
your stomach dropped, and you froze, unable to find the words to respond.
rafe jumped in immediately, his voice firm but a little shaky. “it’s mine,” he said quickly. “the flask—it’s mine, shoupe.”
shoupe raised an eyebrow, clearly unimpressed. “yours, huh? and yet, it’s sitting in her lap?”
“she just—she was holding it for me,” rafe lied, his voice steady despite the panic brewing in his chest. “i wasn’t thinking, i shouldn’t have had it in the car. that’s on me.”
shoupe straightened, sighing heavily. “c’mon, son. you’ve been doing so good lately. now i’m supposed to believe you’re back to this? open containers in the car? speeding? what’s going on?”
“it’s not what it looks like,” rafe said quickly, desperation seeping into his tone. “just give me a ticket for the speeding, and i’ll take care of it. i’ll dump the flask right now.”
shoupe glanced between you and rafe, his sharp eyes narrowing. the tension stretched, the air in the car thick and suffocating. finally, he sighed and shook his head.
“look,” he said, his voice softer now, “you’re lucky i know you’ve been trying to straighten out, son. but i don’t want to see you slipping, especially with her involved.” he gestured toward you with his flashlight.
rafe nodded quickly. “understood. i’ll get it together. promise.”
shoupe studied him for a moment longer before stepping back. “slow down. and get rid of the flask. i better not catch you with it again.”
“yes, sir,” rafe said, his voice tight.
shoupe gave you both one last look before walking back to his car. as the flashing lights receded into the far distance, rafe leaned back in his seat, letting out a shaky exhale.
you stared at him, your emotions swirling in a chaotic mess. “why the hell did you take the blame?”
rafe turned to you, his eyes weary but determined. “because i’m not letting you deal with this bullshit, y/n. not you. never you.”
you opened your mouth to argue, but the words wouldn’t come. instead, you looked out the window, your grip on the flask loosening as rafe started the car again.
the silence between you was heavier than ever, but you could feel his eyes flicking to you now and then, filled with concern and a love you didn’t know how to handle anymore.
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the car stayed silent except for the low hum of the engine as rafe drove. his eyes flicked toward you every few moments, filled with worry and guilt.
you sat stiffly in the passenger seat, staring out the window, the flask now abandoned in your lap. the weight of everything hung heavily in the air, suffocating and thick.
“y/n,” rafe finally said softly, his voice tentative, testing the waters. “can we just—can we talk about this?”
his words broke something in you. the wall you’d been desperately holding up crumbled, and a choked sob escaped your lips.
“i’m sorry,” you whispered, your voice trembling as tears began to stream down your face. “i’m so sorry, rafe.”
rafe immediately pulled the car over to the side of the road, his heart clenching at the sound of your broken voice. “baby, no,” he said, turning to you, his own voice shaking. “don’t do that. don’t apologize. you don’t have to—”
“i was so awful to you,” you cried, covering your face with your hands as your shoulders shook. “you didn’t deserve that. you’re trying so hard to be better, and i—i just lashed out at you.”
rafe reached for your hands, gently pulling them away from your face. his eyes glistened with unshed tears as he looked at you, his expression raw and vulnerable.
“no, angel,” he said, his voice thick. “don’t do that. don’t blame yourself. i’m the one who messed up. i wasn’t there for you when you needed me. i let you down, and now you’re—” his voice cracked, and he turned his head away for a moment, blinking rapidly to keep the tears at bay.
you shook your head, tears spilling freely. “i just—i don’t know how to fix this, rafe. i feel like i’m drowning, and i don’t know how to stop.”
his hands tightened around yours, his own tears threatening to fall. “you don’t have to do it alone, angel,” he said softly. “you don’t have to carry this by yourself. let me help you, please. let me be there for you.”
you looked at him, his eyes filled with nothing but love and desperation, and the weight of it all was almost too much to bear.
“turn around,” you whispered, your voice trembling.
“what?” rafe asked, his brows furrowing in confusion.
“turn around,” you repeated, a fresh wave of tears spilling down your cheeks. “let’s just go home, rafe. please. i don’t—i just want to go home.”
rafe exhaled shakily, nodding as he wiped a hand across his face. “okay, baby,” he said, his voice cracking. “we’ll go home. whatever you need.”
he put the car in reverse, pulling back onto the road. as he drove, his hand reached out to rest on your knee, a silent promise that he wasn’t letting go—not this time.
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tojisun · 1 day ago
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cw: john price x f!reader - older man/younger woman; 18+
john makes you feel beautiful. he dotes on you like you are his doll, splurging everything he’s got until you’re all spoiled.
“m’gonna be y’r rotten girl,” you told to him once, giggling, and john had just hummed as he gathered you in his arms, pulling you up until you’re both chest to chest. he breathed you in, his scruff tickling your jaw, his hands finding purchase along the pudge of your waist.
“i’d love you either way, baby,” john said like his words just didn’t lay waste on you.
you nodded, quiet and shy, your cheeks thrumming with warmth, and john kissed your silence away, murmuring nothings about how he could not wait to dress you up, to see you in his gifts, to fly you to spain and show you how a pretty girl should be cherished. you laughed it up, nodding to indulge him, but john always went through with his word and you found yourself in the next flight to ibiza.
it was exhilarating.
no one has ever done so much for you; no one thought you’re worth more than a 50/50 split dinner that you barely even enjoy or a quickie in a dingy parking lot because apparently a hotel was too much for a ‘casual thing.’
and sure you know you are worth more than those sucky dates, but your roster never changed and it’s like—
if they don’t like you enough, then… are you?
then john came and just. well, fuck — you know?
he’s ruined you for everyone else. he’s ruined you for anything that isn’t himself. john filled you up with fulfilled promises and went above that because he made you his sole point of focus. his priority. because somehow, you triumph over everything.
every of your whispered pleas, every quiet calls, every crooked requests — john always answered them. you are never too much for me, he said. nothing goes before you.
and who is strong enough to not fall for that? no one.
john loves vividly, and he loves you with such vastness it’s incomprehensible. john loves like this, whatever this is, was an organic sort of love; like it did not start with a messy hookup with a friend of a friend of a friend’s… dad.
(but there was something dizzying about the way your bodies clicked. how when john, apparently the mr. price, sank to his knees and flipped your skirt up, something just slotted into place.
it felt right to be there in his master’s bathroom, grasping at the hems of your skirt with shaky hands and watching on with tears in your eyes as he sucked on your clit and laid his tongue flat along your slit. it felt right to be there as he held your hips, thick fingers digging into your fat, and felt him grunting into your flesh, muffled praises slipping from his slick-sheened lips drunkenly. it felt right to beg for his fingers; to beg for more.
and god, it felt good.
so good, you were all numb in the brain, muscles shaking, satiation rolling off of you in heaps.
“shit, baby,” john murmured, cupping your jaw. “you’re so perfect.”
“mmrf?” you grunted, still nonverbal as your body caught up with the tidal waves of pleasure punched out of you.
he laughed, so soft and quiet. “yeah, you are.” he bent forward and pressed a kiss on your forehead. “might just keep you.”
he didn’t sound playful when he said this. he sounded certain, and it filled your heart up with giddiness because—
“please.”
john cooed and snuggled up beside you, pressing his bulk on your back and pulling you impossibly closer. not letting go.
not after that. not anymore.)
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norapretzel · 2 days ago
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I wake up in my bed. My room is the darkest it has ever been, and I cannot find my phone to turn on my flashlight. I stand up and make my way towards where I know the light switch is, when I find it, it does not work. I open my door.
I walk into the rest of the house. The house is the darkest it has ever been. It is silent, I cannot hear anyone. I try to call out up the stairs, but my voice does not make noise. I start panicking. I try to scream as loud as I can, and try to run for my parents bedroom. I make it up the first set of stairs to the living room.
I wake up in bed. My room is the quietest and darkest it has ever been. I know I'm dreaming now, and despite the fact that I hit the point of lucid dreaming, I cannot wake up. I roll out of bed, trying to scream, to speak, anything. My voice makes no noise. This time, I make it halfway up the stairs to my parents room. None of the light switches exist anymore.
I wake up back in my room. My room is still pitch black, and my bed makes no noise when I roll over. This time, when I call out, I make a tiny noise. I can hear someone upstairs. I believe I'm out of my dream as I stand up and walk towards the door. As soon as I grab the handle-
I wake up in my bed. My room is pitch black and dead quiet.
I will be stuck in this loop for a long while. Sometimes I will find my dad, but I'll wake up right after asking him for help. Sometimes I won't even make it out of bed before I feel my eyes open again and I'm back in it. It is the only nightmare I get stuck in now. I grew up with night terrors and learned how to either change genre of dream to reverse the terror, or wake myself up. Usually, all it takes is maybe like 10 seconds of nightmare time for me to go full lucid and wake myself up.
Sometimes, when I "wake up" in my bed in this nightmare, I try so hard to pry my eyes open. I can feel my real eyelids flutter but nothing can wake me up. My current record is about 17 loops before the dream let me go. By the end, I know I'm stuck in a dream, and no matter what I do I can't even change the smallest detail.
When I finally wake up, in my real bed, the first thing I do is turn on my lights and leave the room. Depending on the time, I sometimes go finish sleeping on the couch in the living room.
This is now my only nightmare, and I have it about once a month on average, sometimes more. I have learned how to end every reoccurring nightmare except this one, and usually lucid dream now to the point of changing dreams whenever I get bored.
There is never anything else in the house with me, and the only person I have ever seen is my dad, but he doesn't always appear, and he never can help me, if he tries I just restart the loop again. I can no longer sleep in the dark without white noise or another person with me, because waking up to a silent dark room now gives me panic attacks.
These nightmares started about 4 years ago I think? And are only ever in my current bedroom of my current house.
rb with your most common recurring theme in your nightmares. mine is pregnancy
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wisegirl25 · 3 days ago
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Ways “I love you” is said in Arcane (because those words were never actually said in a show all about love)
“Always with ya sis, even when we’re worlds apart.”
“Still got your insides kid?”
“I am the dirt under your nails Cupcake, nothing’s gonna get me out.”
“Always a dance with you.”
“I’ll never forget this.”
“Don’t cry, you’re perfect.”
“You are the wolf.”
“In all timelines, in all possibilities, only you could show me this.”
“You were never broken Viktor.”
“I would’ve never given you up, not for anything.”
"You have a good heart. Don't ever lose it. No matter what this world does to you."
"Ever since you dropped into my life, it's like I put on glasses..Except, I can't tell whether everything's blurry or clear."
“I must say, since I’ve met you lad, I’ve truly lived.”
“There is no force in this world that can control you. You will never be a passenger.”
“I’ve never seen you give up on anything Ekko.”
“Your ideas change the world. I can’t shake the feeling that that’s who you’re supposed to be.”
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phantomrose96 · 3 days ago
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I'm actually deeply obsessed with the tiny little anecdote Hayward tells about the god Henge and it makes me insane again every time I remember it.
You know the best god I ever met - they called him Henge. He haunted a village up north. He didn’t ask much of you. He liked keepsakes. Things that were no longer useful. Maybe you had a ring you didn’t want to wear any more because it hurt too much. Or you had a key that you weren’t going to use for a very long time, but you wanted to be able to find it again when you did. Or maybe your kid would be born with their eyes and throat shut tight and you didn’t know how to move on. You’d wrap your keepsake in green cotton, and you’d bury under a pile of pebbles in a place only you knew. And you’d make the prayer-marks so that Henge would know just what was being offered. And then one day, years later, when you were ready to pick up whatever you’d left behind but perhaps you didn’t even know it yet yourself, you’d turn and look outside your window, and the ring would be hanging from a tree-branch outside. The key would be resting on your sill. There’d be a newborn child, wrapped in green cotton, resting upon your doorstep. I never understood what Henge wanted with that stuff, but I understood the appeal of going through it. How nice it was to feel that someone had stopped to pick up the things you needed to drop.
The image about the stillborn child just stops me cold like. A child you loved and wanted and is born dead and you can't just part with, can't just accept it, can't find the way to put the work into the funeral and have them gone, forever, to nothing.
That you could put the child down and Henge will just... pick them up. Not save them. Not change what happened. Just give you time to step away. To not need to say "goodbye" to the child yet. To not have to deal, just yet. Just that one day, in the future, when you're ready, whenever that may be, the child would be back on your step for you to bury...
Hayward plays down the ring in his example of just hurting too much but, he plays down the kid too. Is that ring of your dead spouse? A dead family member? What kind of key do you need out of your possession until you're ready - or, Hayward, is this honestly just a strategy to keep something where you yourself can't lose it...? Can it be that simple?
I'm insane about Henge. I'm insane about putting a thing down temporarily, and having a god which will hold it while you can't.
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postsforposting · 3 days ago
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i'm surprised i've never seen anyone say that, because they didn't design the system, therefore nothing they choose to do is their fault and isn't a moral statement.
the whole point is that it's simple. simplistic. and yet we can't find an answer to even the simplest question. people keep changing it to make themselves feel better about it. it's common that people won't even engage with it, as if denying it is a solution. i guess that is a form of "this isn't my fault or my problem". if you act, you "take responsibility" for it all.
are you responsible? how much? does changing the parameters from a lever to shoving matter, and why? does it matter if you designed the system or not? why does it matter who the people are or how they got there?
life isn't fair and people don't like confronting that. there MUST be an out that leaves you unambiguously the good person. that's the just world fallacy: if only you can figure out how things work, nothing bad will ever happen to you, nothing bad will ever happen to anyone again, you'll never do anything bad again. you'll never deserve to be on the tracks, you'll never be forced onto them.
except that's a childish fantasy and life isn't fair. all you can do is try to make it more fair, which is the whole point of the question: what does that mean? why does bitching about it matter, when all that does is put moral paint over it to deny responsibility and thus consequences? why are there consequences when all you did was try to help? why is your trying to help nitpicked as if you designed the circumstances?
The root of my frustration with a lot of trolley problem discourse is that 'What does it mean to act ethically in a world where shitty luck and the actions of strangers you'll never meet have left you without any purely good options?' is, like, possibly one of the most relevant and universally applicable questions moral philosophy might help answer.
Saying it's a bad question because it's the negligent trolley engineer's fault literally exactly misses the point - yes how to deal on a personal level with systems and infrastructure that designed without much care for human collateral damage is an incredibly useful thing to think about!
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rafemotherfuckingcameron · 2 days ago
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THIRD TRIMESTER
Word Count: 1.1K
Pairing(s): Reader x Rafe 
Warnings: Stress and anxiety during pregnancy
Summary: Rafe defends you, pregnancy stress causes emotional pain
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The third trimester had come faster than you anticipated, and with it came a series of emotions, both overwhelming and beautiful. You were now heavily pregnant, your body changing in ways that made you feel like you were barely holding onto yourself, but all the while, Rafe was there, supporting you through every step. The two of you had recently moved into a new house, a small but cozy place where you could begin your life together as a family. It was everything you’d dreamed of—well, almost everything.
-
There was still the issue of Rafe’s father, who hadn’t made it easy on you. From the moment you found out you were pregnant, he’d been openly critical of your decision to start a family so young.
“I don’t know why you’d want to keep the baby. You’re barely out of high school,” his voice echoed in your mind as you sat on the couch in your new home, wrapping your arms around your belly. “And you think you’re ready to raise a child? Wait until you see what comes out of her, Rafe. She won’t even look the same, and it’s not like she’ll go back to being skinny after all that. You really want to deal with that?”
You could still feel the sting of his words, even now. It wasn’t the first time he’d said something hurtful about your pregnancy, but it always hit hard. Rafe had defended you every time, but it never seemed to be enough to quiet the doubts you had. His dad’s comments made you second-guess everything, even your own self-worth, even when you knew deep down it wasn’t true.
Rafe had been there, as always, but that didn’t stop the growing anxiety within you. Every time his father would make a comment, it would take everything inside you not to cry or snap back. But today, something inside you broke. You had been unpacking boxes when you overheard another comment from Rafe’s dad, and it sent you spiraling. You knew Rafe wasn’t home, so you found yourself collapsing on the couch in tears, holding your belly as your emotions threatened to take over.
Just as the pain of the words sank deeper, the door to the living room opened, and Rafe stepped in, looking concerned. His eyes softened as soon as he saw your face, tears streaking down your cheeks, your hands clutching your stomach in distress.
“Baby?” he whispered, kneeling down in front of you. “What happened?”
Through shaky breaths, you tried to explain. “I just... I just can’t take it anymore. He keeps saying I’m too young, and it’s like he doesn’t believe I can do this. He’s always saying that things are going to change after labor, that you won’t even look at me the same way... I feel like I’m not good enough for this baby.”
Rafe’s jaw clenched with anger, but his face softened as he gently cupped your face in his hands. “Listen to me, okay? You are everything I could ever need. You’re the mother of my child, and nothing—nothing—will change that. Not the way you look, not what happens after labor. You could go through the toughest thing in the world, and I would still love you with everything I have. Don’t let him get in your head.”
You looked into Rafe’s eyes, your heart aching at his words, but the anxiety and emotional turmoil didn’t subside. You couldn’t stop crying. You wanted to be strong, but everything just felt so heavy. The emotional strain was overwhelming, and you felt like you couldn’t breathe, couldn’t get a grip on yourself.
Rafe’s protective instincts kicked in. His voice was steady but urgent as he pulled you into a tight embrace, rubbing your back soothingly. “It’s okay, baby. Take a few deep breaths. We’re okay. I’m here. The baby’s okay.”
But as you tried to steady your breathing, it felt impossible. You couldn’t calm down. The tears kept coming, and your chest tightened painfully. The stress had taken its toll, and you could feel it radiating through your body. Your heartbeat was erratic, and your baby seemed to be reacting too. The panic only deepened.
“I can’t breathe,” you gasped, clutching your chest, the pain intensifying. You were hyperventilating, tears streaming down your face. “Rafe, it hurts. I don’t know what to do.”
Rafe’s eyes widened in fear as he frantically grabbed his phone. “I’m calling an ambulance. It’s going to be okay, just stay with me.”
Within minutes, the paramedics arrived and rushed into the house. They assessed the situation quickly, asking questions and checking on both you and the baby. Rafe was by your side the whole time, holding your hand tightly, his face pale with worry.
Once you were in the ambulance, the pain started to subside, but your body still felt weak and shaky. The journey to the hospital felt long and suffocating, and you couldn’t help but feel a deep fear of what might be happening to you and the baby.
At the hospital, the doctors quickly ran tests, checking the baby’s heartbeat and your vitals. They explained that what you were experiencing was likely a panic attack, brought on by stress and the emotional pressure you had been under. It wasn’t something to be alarmed about, but they strongly advised you to stay calm in the coming weeks to prevent any further stress on the baby.
“You need to take care of yourself, both physically and emotionally,” the doctor said gently. “The next few weeks are crucial for both you and the baby. Stress can affect your health and the baby’s development. You need to avoid any situations that could increase that anxiety.”
Rafe was at your side, holding your hand tightly as the doctor finished speaking. “I’m not going anywhere. I’ll make sure she’s calm. I’ll keep her safe.”
You felt the sincerity in his voice, and although you still felt a little shaken, hearing him promise to be there for you made everything feel a bit more manageable.
As you were discharged and brought back to your new home, Rafe stayed close, making sure to comfort you and help you get settled back on the couch. He insisted that you rest, assuring you that everything would be okay. You couldn’t help but smile faintly at his care, feeling more grateful than ever that he was by your side.
“Don’t worry about anything else, baby,” Rafe said softly as he kissed the top of your head. “We’re in this together. I won’t let anything happen to you or our little one.”
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