#and it did not deserve to get treated the way it did

[vanillarosekiss]

Eternally thinking about how Husband!Simon Riley would always keep you, his loving wife, nicely fed and fucked…

Pairing: Husband!Simon Riley x afab!reader

A/N: can you tell i need a bf? this is not proof read btw!

Warnings: heavy smut with no plot, highly descriptive sexual actions, mentions of cnc at the end, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it people!) language, Husband!Simon Riley x afab!reader.

Simon took great care in keeping his wife happy. As a military man who’d been subject to changing his old ways, he had taken pride in the fact that his missus was always looked after, fed well, and fucked regularly as needed.

It’s sort of like taking care of a plant, he would think. A delicate house plant, capable of looking after itself at times, but needed some external factors to keep it growing properly. That’s what Simon was, your external factor. He would always make sure you’d had something to eat, allowing you to cook for him occasionally but also taking the same duty for you.

And he was a great cook, underrated really, many didn’t know how good his culinary skills were. Of course, you did.

He would get back from a day of work, exhausted and fed up, but wouldn’t allow himself to sleep until his missus had been eaten out properly and had a sufficient orgasm. After all, you were the one who cared and loved him so much, so you should surely get a reward, pretty girl?

He wouldn’t leave you hanging either, best belive it. He came home one day, finding you trying to work yourself up to orgasm. Silly girl, don’t you know that it’s Simon’s job? He would pull your hand away from your already soaking pussy, immediately delving down on it with his mouth, hot and ready to work for a reward. Your hands would grip onto his short blonde hair, moaning his name as he devoured your mound, his nose occasionally catching your clit and creating the friction you so longed for. He would continue these ministrations for a while, his thumb coming to help work you by rubbing small clockwise circles on your delicate nub, building up the pressure over time. As you writhed around, already overstimulated after coming on his mouth once, he wouldn’t stop, knowing you could take more.

“Come on, lovie, i know you can take it” he would coax you into orgasming again and again until you were all fucked out. He would usually put his needs aside, unless he had a particularly stressful day. In this case, he’d apologise for riling you all up but doesn’t he deserve a treat once in a while for looking after you so well?

“That’s it baby, take it all like the good wife you are” he would groan as he stuffed your pussy with his hard cock, precum leaking from the soft pink tip that was now almost hitting your cervix. He would undoubtedly finish in you, apologising profusely for the mess. He would obviously clean you up, the gentleman he is, only after fucking his cock back into you gently once or twice. What? He didn’t want his seed going to waste.

i must be ovulating because i cannot stop THINKING about him recently.

[fandomsandfeminism]

How would Ted Bundy do in a society which fully prioritized social services, restorative practices, prevention and treatment to the extent that all prisons have been closed? I dunno, man. But that's my point- neither do you, but you picked him because you think the answer is "he'd just keep killing people no matter what" and there's no evidence in the world I could present that would prove otherwise.

Look, there's two ways to think about this-

1. The practical. Full prison abolition is a long term aspiration. There are many many steps between where we are and that, and each one is better than the last. The second to last step would be 99.999% prison abolition with just 1 facility left to house those for whom nothing else stops them from being an active and ongoing threat to others. And even if you think THAT is the last actual realistic step, not 100%, you advocate for 100% for as long as you can because you want to make sure that anyone who can be helped IS. You advocate for 100% to make sure we don't stop at 99.98% if 99.99% is possible.

2. The theoretical.

I don't think any human is born evil. I don't think any human being is inherently so broken and so tainted and so foul that nothing in the world could ever help them. I think the only limitations are time and resources. And I think that whether or not that 100% abolition is ever practical given the limitations of human time and resources, it is something that philosophically it is important to hold onto.

Prison is dehumanizing. And the declaration that some people can only ever be dealt with no matter what except prison is dehumanizing. And once you cede that *some* people can and even should be treated that way- I think it allows us to be complacent with things we should not be complacent with.

It's very clear that we agree on most points of this issue. That the prison system only makes our society more violent and more dangerous. That it functions as legal slavery. That it is used as a weapon against already marginalized communities. That we need to get rid of it. Your hang up is on that last prison cell and the last person who you think deserves to be in it. But that's the thing about systems and rights- once you decide that prison is something that a person can deserve, then the powers that be get to decide which people that includes.

You think people used to argue that "we can't stop cutting off the hands of thieves- some people will never stop stealing unless you do." There are so many ways in which societies used to punish crime that we *no longer do.* we don't tar and feather people. People arent drawn and quartered. We don't stone people and whip people or lock them in pillories. The systems that replaced those punishments didn't *end crime*, but it did better society. Ask yourself why prisons couldn't be the same.

[big-tiddy-goth-gremlin]

Okay so the finale of Arcane was great in a lot of ways but I feel I need to voice a little bit of disappointment/resentment for Act III.

First of all, Ekko and Sevika deserved better than the endings they got. Ekko did more in that battle than anyone else, and yet he ends up alone and sad. Sevika is the only Zaunite put on a council that will probably be classist asf to her.

Second, the total neglect of Isha (both her life and her death). Acts I and II built a narrative of found family with Isha, Jinx, and Sevika, only for it to not contribute to the greater narrative at all and to be completely thrown out in Act III.

Third, and probably most controversially, I do not think Caitlyn deserved Vi in the end. For reference, I really really liked CaitVi in the first season. I liked seeing a complex dynamic between two well-done lesbian characters. And then in the second season, Caitlyn takes her trauma and misery out on Vi. She essentially becomes a fascist dictator, floods the undercity with poisonous gas, increases imprisonment of Zaunites, works closely with Ambessa, and nearly kills Isha. And I was willing to hear out a redemption arc if it was good enough. But it wasn’t. There was never a decent apology to Vi, never any form of apology or regret for what she did to Zaun, no remorse over pointing a gun at a child. Just a vague air of “my bad” along with killing Ambessa. After everything she did to Vi and her people, I do not think Caitlyn remotely deserved to be with Vi, who spent the season coping, doing damage control, and tirelessly trying to fix her family. I am a wlw with an amazing girlfriend, and I love that we saw an endgame lesbian relationship, but I don’t like their dynamic or the way Caitlyn treats Vi.

Finally, the lack of any kind of conclusion to the Zaun/Piltover conflict. I understand that they were able to unite to fight Noxus, but aside from that, hardly anything has changed. ONE Zaunite was put on the council, and that’s all. No redistribution of wealth, no reparations, no sovereignty for Zaun, no apology for the decades of suffering Piltover caused Zaun. Ekko must return alone to a desolate undercity while Caitlyn and Vi live in the massive, luxurious Kiramman mansion.

My main issues here can be boiled down to this: Act III felt rushed. Very few stories were fully developed and satisfyingly concluded. The ones we did get (Viktor & Jayce, Mel returning to Noxus) were fantastic, but it left much to be desired for the other characters and storylines.

[mysticheathenn]

Messages From The Upside Down

Hi, Hexlings!

This pick-a-card reading is about messages from a different version of yourself. Think of it as a higher self but more so of the version of yourself that you could be if you did the work. Just like Stranger things this is a different dimension of who you could be.

This is a general reading, remember to take what resonates and leave what does not. This reading does not supplement your need to seek professional help. Tarot should be used as entertainment and not a for sure answer to your problems but as a guide, a sense of hope, and amusement.

Take your time when choosing your pile. Ask yourself the question and choose the picture that you can’t stop looking at. Listen to your intuition.

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Pile 1:

Who are you in the Upside Down? Tarot: The Star, 2 of Swords, 10 of Swords, The Emperor, The Hermit, Ace of Wands

In the upside-down world, you are someone who doesn't shy away from attention. You are heavily action-oriented in everything you do and know how to pick your battles. For some people, this is knowing when you need to retreat from situations that no longer serve you or being decisive on the things that you want in your life. You listen to your intuition by quieting your mind and going within and also honoring your creativity. Creativity doesn't necessarily have to be the arts but in general, you won't view anything that is deemed childish like video games, coloring books, etc as something that should be frowned upon, unworthy of your time, or keeping the mindset of a starving artist alive when so many creatives walk this earth making it work as a living. I'm getting strong energy of knowing what you want and going after it and releasing things that no longer serve you. In the upside-down world, you treat everyone like a mirror that they reflect back at you. If someone doesn't make time for you, you give the same energy back and move on with life instead of wallowing in your thoughts or even for some of you being as so much as desperate for anyone's attention that do not deserve it. I hear, I attract I don't chase is the motto you carry in your back pocket in the upside-down world. You are a star and not afraid to show it or even feel as if you don't deserve the attention that people give you for either your work or you as a whole. Maybe some of you feel as if you don't deserve great things in your life because of self-doubt, people putting you down, etc. Either way, in the upside down everything is for you, you are worthy of everything, and you take action toward your goals because you know that someone out there with not even half of your talent is getting the attention that you so deserve.

How can you achieve the upside down? Tarot: Same Tarot Cards

Self-Esteem and Discipline. Believe that you are the main character in your reality because you are. Everyone else is a side character in your life and shouldn't be used to guide you on your journey unless it is helpful advice and not them projecting their own fear onto you. Believe that you can achieve anything in your life because you can. Everything is for the taking for you if you believe that it is. Surround yourself with better people and stop looking for reassurance and permission from others that your ideas, projects, and goals are something you should go after or not. Your ideas and goals were given to you for a reason keep them close to your chest unless you feel guided to share this information with someone. Lastly, you need to work on your discipline. Stop putting everything off until tomorrow. Stop waiting until you have the "motivation" to do things because motivation while useful will not get you far if you keep waiting for it. This reminds me of the scene in a Cinderella Story (Hilary Duff Version) when she's standing in the locker room at school to confront Austin about his fickleness. She says "But I can't wait for you because waiting for you is like waiting for the rain in this drought. Useless and disappointing." (Clip) Find ways to pump yourself up and start believing in your abilities to achieve and go after your goals.

Things you achieve in the upside down: Tea Tree Oracle Deck:

January may be significant for you of when you begin your "upside down" journey. It's giving, new year new me energy. / Hammock: Taking a vacation, physically, or mentally / Bridge: Successfully overcoming a problem/ Fan: Romance, Celebration, Party / Pail: Time to get out of a situation / Ear: Good News Wishing Well: Family wishes come true.

Pile 2:

Who are you in the Upside Down? Tarot: Knight of Cups, 4 of Pentacles, Awakening, Death, 7 of Wands, 10 of Cups

In the upside world, you are someone who embraces change, transformation, happiness, and lives their live authentically. Heavy emphasis on living your life authentically and to the fullest. You may in your current life hesitate at the slightest bit of change because you hate the feeling of being uncomfortable even if it's just for a short period of time so you miss out on so many opportunities because you refuse to live the life you desperately want to live. You may have been going back and forth deciding if you should choose pile l or not. In the upside down you know no boundary nor do you place yourself as one thing. The quote or more like a scene that is coming to mind with this pile is if you watch the show Community it's the scene where Dean Pelton is supposed to "come out" as being the first gay Dean/member of the board even though that is 2/5ths of what he is. Quote from the scene: "I'm not just gay, if coming out was a magic show and coming out is pulling a rabbit out of the hat, then I am one of those never-ending handkerchiefs." (Clip) You refuse to place yourself in a box and stay there because of being comfortable or even being scared to show who you really are to the world because you just don't give a fuck. You place your happiness above everyone and everything because you believe that life is too short to care what others especially those who follow trends and do not express who they want to be. You live body and proudly in the upside down. You may possibly even be a part of the LGBTQ+ community and possibly hide your sexuality or are afraid of exploring it due to fear of what others think or of being disowned. Definitely getting a lot of LGBTQ+ vibes with how colorful your hand of cards are. You don't have to be but if you are this is a confirmation for you that you chose the right pile over pile l if you were hesitant. You also know who you are in the upside down and not allowing others to tell you who you are.

How can you achieve the upside down? Tarot: Same Tarot Cards

Confidence and Courage. The question I feel you need to keep in the back of your head at all times is if I were lying on my death bed right now how much of your life would you regret because you didn't choose to live your life for me instead of listening to others?? While I am a believer of reincarnation not everyone is and no one is certain what happens beyond death, so what are you doing in this life that you are not doing that you want to do. Why are you not and how can you change that? Is it moving out of your parent's house and cutting them off? Is it cutting off family in general or even friends? Is it gaining the courage that people will hate you regardless if you decide to follow the crowd versus your own beat of a drum? Who? What? Where? Why? and When? How? are the questions you need to focus on. Who are you right now? What do you want to show up as in the world and does it align with who you are now. When can this happen (moving out, now, changing countries, etc) Why aren't you living your life authentically and be honest? *David Beckham Voice* BE HONEST! Keep going down the list until you finish and ask yourself the very first question I mentioned and start living your life authentically.

Things you achieve in the upside down: Tea Tree Oracle Deck:

Goldfish: Increase in material or Spiritual growth / Elephant: A long journey either physical or mental will leave you wiser in the end / Tower: Solid Foundation success with effort / Candle: You will be shown the way / Grapes: Time to go out and have fun / Inkpot: Problems to be solved / Casket: Someone going out of your life or the end of a situation / Rabbit: Too much concern w/ Sexual matters (again LGBTQ+) / Love (Self-love and finding romantic love)

Pile lll:

Who are you in the Upside Down? Tarot: 7 of Swords, 4 of Wands, The Hermit, 6 of Pentacles, 10 of Pentacles, 10 of Wands.

It's always my pile lll or pile lV that I feel the need to always give a hug to. In the upside down you are no longer tolerating people, places, or things that are not good for you. You are no longer allowing yourself to be in spaces where you stress and overexert yourself to the max for others. You are not the person who puts other people's happiness before your own and you are also someone who gives to those who give back. Just like pile ll you may have been somewhat drawn to pile l but your messages are completely different for the most part just tiny similarities. You are also someone who is not afraid of being alone or lonely. You take pride in being in your own company because you know that is your happy place and peace. It is a place where you are not being disrespected and a place that you know is full of love and not competition, jealousy, or hate. You are also someone in the upside down who only has people who want to celebrate you constantly around you. Not only celebrates you but uplifts you and protects you from others who want to tear you down and see you at your lowest. In the upside down overall you choose happiness and have boundaries in place for those who want to take advantage of you, treat you horribly, etc.

How can you achieve the upside down? Tarot: Same Tarot Cards

Boundaries and Hermit Mode. Being okay with being alone and "hurting other people's feelings is how you can achieve the upside down. Some of you are not okay with setting boundaries because you have people-pleasing tendencies and are too afraid of losing people even the ones who treat you like crap. Shadow work would be beneficial for this pile in getting to the root of why you are afraid of being alone and being in your own company. Shadow work also in boundaries and understanding why you can't let people who treat you like crap out of your life. You know you deserve better than some of the people in your life and you also know that it is time for you to put your happiness first over others feelings.

Things you achieve in the upside down: Tea Tree Oracle Deck:

Mice: Discord among friends or family / Eagle: Triumph over troubles, and obstacles / Fly: A period of ill health or depression (from cutting ties) / February (the month you may start this journey) Firecracker: Excitement (new beginnings) / Butterfly: A Change for the better / Older Man: Dealings with an older man / Wreath: Sorrow over a loss / Desk: Pay attention to your work / Pin: New Job or Career.

Thank you for liking and reblogging my readings. I always appreciate you guys on here and on Patreon.

Stay safe and be blessed

[gwemmieee]

Yeah. I have a big bone to pick with women who go out of their way to gatekeep someone out of our club. Most of them are cis and straight, but trans fems who do this unfortunately exist. That instance looks like some disgusting hypocrisy to me, because most baby trans fems really emotionally lean on the willingness of this community to emphasize that you are your gender and you are valid no matter how many steps you've already taken and been successful with. That is a crucial, supportive message, and suppressing it in any way is tantamount to pulling up the ladder behind you. Which, yeah, every community has its assholes who pull up ladders.

It is also a tough line to walk sometimes for women, because most of us have learned that there are certain ways we can't entirely just open up to most masculine folks and let them into our entire lives and every space. Not without a lot of pain. So we are incentivized to wait until someone makes it clear that they're safe, before they're let into our inner lives more. This function has caused me SO much strife, because before I was accepted as a woman, it kept me outside in the cold, alone, really close to an early grave, but now that I am fully living as a woman, and even before I was doing that, my efforts to ignore this function entirely and just let any masculine person into my heart, my inner world, and my safest spaces, have not always gone well, and sometimes those efforts have backfired, made me unsafe, and deeply traumatized me.

These days, the only conclusion I've been able to find is that women need to work on what we recognize as red and green flags, for who is safe. It's pretty easy to see that the average set of red and green flags you see most non-queer white women adhere to are... crap. Truly crap. Delusional, not based in reality, etc. And that sucks because it isolates them more and it gives them more excuse to be really shitty to people, or to gossip about them in ways that really aren't fair to them.

Earlier in my transition, I still had it internalized that I had had so much trouble because I wasn't good enough, because I didn't do enough, and that's why women didn't let me in. But I was literally running around freely saying out loud that I was genderfluid, that I had no concept of manhood and little concept of gender, that I thought it would be cool if I was born as a woman, that I wanted other pronouns to be used on me, that I could be pretty gay/queer, acting pretty gay/queer, openly rejecting most masculine behaviors and modes of thought, constantly openly celebrating femininity, experimenting with gender presentation... I was a very queer little dude. And I've only been able to recognize that in retrospect. Because nobody let me in. Trans fems may have let me in, but they weren't around much in the late 00s and early 10s. I never met one. But I did meet and usually deeply connect with countless fellow eggs, before any of us knew. In situations like mine, trans fems generally didn't even get to find themselves until a bisexual cis woman took it upon herself to date them as a perceived man, and then recognize their queerness and allow them to explore gender with her acceptance and assistance. Because being allowed into womanhood was so rare and taboo that it had to happen behind closed doors as part of a romantic relationship. I was aro/ace, and I unconsciously looked to get the same experience out of a platonic friendship, but all I got was led on. Told I was a close friend but still treated like a stray animal compared to their feminine friends. Not let in.

Meanwhile, cis women, and fem-raised queer folks who at the time universally saw themselves as, yknow proudly not quite men at least, universally treated me like a burly cis man deserving of none of their support or curiosity and all of their suspicion and gossip about how "he's creepy." Consistently. Until I finally came out as a woman in 2022. And that's so 100% on them. They went out of their way to not see me for who I was and just keep me out in the cold. So yeah. The state of gatekeeping of womanhood is *bad*. And in my experience, most of it comes from people who had/have easy access to unquestioned claims of womanhood, whether that's because they're AFAB or because their transition into womanhood was really fast and made them really conventionally attractive.

But what about trans fems? Well, we aren't perfect with our red and green flags, either. It's hard to be. Personally, I've noticed there is a small contingent (VERY small) of trans fems my age who operate more like the old world transsexuals in that they really are truscum gatekeepers, often also ableist, and borderline psychopathic in the level of emotional labor they expect from you as a friend vs. what they're willing to put up with in return. And that is very unfortunate. My early transition saw a lot of them genuinely help me as incredible new friends, but then hurt me badly and burn bridges for no good reason. And I feel that there is a bit of a schism in the trans fem community between elders who usually just want to stealth out--who look down on baby transes and cringe and don't help us, or even if they do talk to us and help, there is still a very clear line denominating their actual friends and community that we never get to cross into--and the rest of us who openly embrace being queer and not assimilating all the way. But, frankly? Most trans fems I've met are the most welcoming and least gatekeeping folks on the planet. Most are that latter, queerer camp. And we operate exactly the way that we should: we let anyone safe into our inner world, even if that safe person happens to be a man. And some of us STILL see that backfire. And so even we can't be completely carefree. But we can always learn and grow and get better and better at what we actually identify as red and green flags.

wait where are all the trans guys

Historical-anthropological research, especially the work taking place before the 21st century or outside the West, tends to focus entirely on transfeminized groups. So when reading these works it’s pretty natural to ask — wait, where are all the trans guys? This is a reasonable question with a few clear answers; this post is something quick I can point people to.

The central condition of transfeminized groups' absorption into feminist activism has been to accept a kind of symmetry with select TME groups through the understanding of trans femininity as "gender variance." Under this framework, transfeminized groups' social position can be understood as a consequence of gender variance and some abstract violation of cis norms; this was proposed by people like Susan Stryker and Emi Koyama [1], among others, and continues to structure trans inclusion today. It also fails when considering several basic aspects of these groups:

Transfeminized groups are associated with hyperspecific labor practices, most frequently sex work, but also hair styling, drag, makeup artistry, acting, and other forms of 'gender work.'

Metropolitan transfeminized groups appear in the archive as highly clustered and active groups connected with, but usually intensely split from, the masculine men they fucked.

Transfeminized groups become a kind of 'third gender' on an epistemic level; they are Known to wider society before and after “coming out” in a way that USAmerican transmasculinity has only recently vaguely approached.

Transfeminized groups are heavily clustered in labor practice, social organization, and epistemic position, although this is not universal -- certain strains of USAmerican transfemininity have become a bit more labor-agnostic in the last two decades, not-so-coincidentally alongside more general currents of gender-labor liberation. The messy strains of trans male identity recovered from the archive and from current practice tend to lack labor, social, and epistemic coherence. As Aaron Devor notes in FTM, his 1997 history of FTM men, trans men in the 20th century tended to transition out of cities and into the countryside, finding low-profile places they could exist in. These practices, and the earlier "female husband" practices described by Jen Manion, relied on the labor-agnostic nature of transitioned manhood in order to disappear from public life. Transfeminized groups, on the other hand, are categorically restricted from the main form of economic life historically available to women -- marriage. Their labor practices are heavily constrained and have almost always revolved around some form of 'gender work:' as Susan Stryker put it, you need to get people to pay you for being a trans woman. Transmasculinity pushes away feminized restrictions on labor; trans femininity is labor.

Because transfeminized identities are so often labor-identities, and because their specific brand of 'gender work' and hormonal/silicone/surgical embodiment usually requires both specialized training and community support, nearly every metropolitan center in the world developed highly centralized transfeminized groups over the course of the 20th century [2]. As Ochoa notes, this visibility is partially due to epistemic visibility (everyone knows what a trans is), partially due to group structure (people work and train each other), and partially due to the selectively visible demands of finding clients. Fledglings come in with a way of being that is always already visible to society, but changing the body to match and learning how to fully enact and slowly contest the third-gender labor-identity they've been given takes a lot of community support.

So as labor-identities, transfeminized groups tend to a level of labor/community/epistemic coherence that has no clear counterpart. The news archives we have of trans men (as seen in Manion) position them as singular and easily absorbed back into the female gestalt; the cisgender feminist/gayguy/AIDS researchers that form the bulk of historical-anthropological work saw them as unnecessary to their grand theories of gender; the communities themselves have been materially fractured and, for the groups that rise out of lesbian-feminist activism, only partially committed to their own existence. The result of all this is that there is no clear equivalent to the "transfeminized groups" of Jules-Gill Peterson; there is no symmetry to trannydom, and while additional work to unearth trans manhood in the archive remains extremely valuable, sometimes the necessary level of label-coherence and social existence just isn't there.

[1] Stryker, "My Words to Victor Frankenstein Above the Village of Chamounix: Performing Transgender Rage," Emi Koyama, "The Transfeminist Manifesto" [2] As seen in Namaste, Invisible Lives, Prieur, "Mema's House, Mexico City," Kulick, "Travesti," Newton, "Mother Camp," Ochoa, "Queen for a Day," Hegarty, "The Made-Up State," and plenty more. Most of these works came out in the late 80s and 90s due to a combination of the feminist "third gender" craze, the burgeoning field of masculinity studies, and AIDS.

[ho-for-joequinn-fics]

You Are Worth It

Emperor Geta x f!Reader

warnings: 18+ ONLY! Minors DNI or you will be blocked! mentions of murder, possessive!Geta, unprotected p in v smut, rough sex, slapping, choking, creampie, profanity, etc.

summary: You’ve fallen in love with one of Rome’s crazed Emperors and he with you. Your family hates it and have been plotting behind your backs to find a way to get you back home to them, but those plans change when word of mouth reaches Emperor Geta and he decides they have to be dealt with.

Emperor Geta was good to you, he treated you the way you deserved and loved you more than anyone thought possible of him. There was a side to Geta that no one else saw, a side that was only reserved for you, but with a side so hidden how could your family truly know that he could be trusted with your heart?

You were the youngest of four siblings and the only daughter to your parents. Your three older brothers were part of the Roman army and were sent out to war by Emperors Geta and Caracalla quite often. Despite their constant lingering absence, they still did their best to make sure you were safe at all costs. It wasn’t until their return from an almost six month journey that they discovered you’d been seeing Emperor Geta and now living with him.

Your brothers felt they’d failed you, but they also took their disappointment out on your parents for not trying to protect you while they were away for so long. Your dad may have been a retired soldier, but that didn’t mean he lacked the strength to protect you. No, he was just too afraid of the consequences if he even dared try to take you back from Geta’s clutches. But with your brothers back from the war, they and your parents were now plotting a way to get you back home and as far away from Emperor Geta as possible.

None of them knew that you’d been sneaking around with Geta long before your brothers’ six month absence, it was only then that you felt it was safer for you to see him publicly without the worry and fear of your brothers catching you. A big part of you hoped they’d have gotten killed while they were away, a pretty morbid thought regarding your own brothers, but your love for Geta was far stronger than the relationship you had with them.

Your parents had expressed their disappointment when they finally found out you were seeing Geta, but you didn’t let that get to you, you told them that you were in love with him and he with you and that nothing they could say would ever change that. They hated that they were losing you to someone so evil, which was why when your brothers returned from the war they decided to devise their plan to get you back and keep you away from Emperor Geta whether by force or finding a way to kill him.

A month had gone by since your brothers returned home from the war and they were discussing amongst themselves your family’s plan to kill Geta and bring you home while they were preparing for yet another upcoming journey to conquer another country the Emperors felt needed conquering. They talked about how they hoped to get the deed done before they left again for war, but one of Emperor Geta’s loyal soldiers overheard their discussion and sent immediate word to Geta who was enraged at what he was told. It was then that he devised his own plan to have your family killed, every last one of them, because only he could have you.

The same soldier that overheard your family’s plan was who Geta entrusted to do his dirty work, which was to kill your three brothers first and then take out your parents. He felt it was smarter to start with your brothers, that way your parents had no protection when they were to be killed in their sleep. Killing your brothers was easy, all their fellow soldier had to do was slip enough poison into their wine to kill them within minutes. Your parents, well they were strangled in their sleep one by one, so the deed to kill your entire family was a piece of cake.

Once Geta was made aware that your family was taken out, he found it to be the perfect time to tell you. He wasn’t sure how you were going to take the news, but something told him it wasn’t going to be an outburst of rage towards him. He found you curled up in your shared bed reading poetry, which had him smiling fondly at you as he moved to take a seat beside you, his hand reaching to take hold of yours. “My dearest girl, may we talk? I’ve got something I must tell you. It’s quite urgent.”

You looked up at him with a warm smile of your own, giving a gentle squeeze of his hand before bringing it to your lips to press a loving kiss to his knuckles. “Of course, my love. What is it?” Whatever it was, you were already mentally preparing yourself for the worst news imaginable, but either way you trusted him more than anything.

“This...may be hard for you to hear, my love, but your family was murdered last night. Every single one of them. I’m so sorry.” The look in his eyes as he stared into your own when he said this told you he had something to do with it and that he was in fact not sorry at all, you knew Geta well enough by now to know when his eyes gave him away. There were several seconds of silence between the two of you while you processed the news before he spoke up again. “Oh, I should add that it was I who put the hit on them.”

I knew it. Before you could say anything in response, he continued.

“But I need you to understand that I had to do it. It was either my life or theirs. One of my trusted men in the Roman army overheard your brothers talking about your family’s plan to have me killed so they could get you back from me. What else was I supposed to do? Lose you and my life? I could not let that happen. You are mine, you belong to me and I was not about to let anyone take you away from me.”

You melted beneath the touch of his hands when they reached out to cup your face, meeting his gaze with softened orbs and a small smile as you blinked a few times. If he was worried that you’d be mad at him, he was so far off. If only he knew that you’d been praying to the gods for something to happen to your family so you could be together without them trying to get in the middle of your relationship. “My love,” you murmured. “If you thought this news was going to upset me, then you were very wrong. I figured my family would try getting between us since they did not like you nor trust you, but I do because I know you better than them and everyone else in Rome who feels the way they did. I love you, Geta. You are worth it, you are worth losing my family for.”

“Gods, I love you.” He sighed before bringing you in for a deep kiss fueled by the pure love he had for you, one hand continuing to cup your cheek while the other wrapped around your waist to pull you closer to him. He hummed in content when you moved to straddle his lap, your thighs resting on each side of him and your arms wrapping around his neck while you pressed yourself flush against him. He felt as his cock began to stir beneath his tunic, which had him letting out a low groan into the kiss.

You felt it too, which made you smirk before you started rocking yourself against his cock to make it grow harder. “Mmmm... feels like someone’s excited.” You murmured, giving a light nip to his bottom lip before leaning back to start pushing his robe off of his shoulders, smiling when he did the same with your sleep robe after untying it.

“That’s just what you do to me, love. Can’t help it.” Geta mumbled, dipping his head down to start swirling his tongue around your nipple, earning a long sigh of content from your lips. “You know I’m insatiable for you, just as you are for me.” He took your nipple between his teeth then, giving a light nip and tug before wrapping his lips around it and sucking hard, humming as it had you arching your back to push your chest closer to him.

“Fuck. I need you. Please.” You whimpered, shifting backwards on his lap a bit so you could start pushing up the fabric of his tunic to free his cock, your hand wrapping around it and giving firm strokes up and down. You squealed when he stood up to toss you onto your back on the bed, giving your lip a hard bite as you watched him start removing the remainder of his garments.

As soon as he was naked, he crawled onto the bed and grabbed your legs to place them over his shoulders so he could force his cock deep inside you, pulling a loud scream of pleasure from your throat as the head of his cock hit you just right. Your eyes rolled into the back of your head as he started pounding into you, but that earned you a slap across the face before he was harshly gripping your jaw to get you to look up at him. “Eyes on me while I fuck you.” He growled out, only bringing his hand back to your thigh once your eyes were focused on him. “Atta girl.”

All you could do was moan in response, your jaw slack as you did your best to keep your gaze fixed on him, not wanting to disappoint him by disobeying his demand. Your hands found purchase on the bed where they gripped onto the bedding beneath you, your grip only growing tighter when Geta leaned forward to bend your knees until your thighs were pressed against your chest, giving him a better angle to fuck even deeper into you. “Oh! Right there! Fuck, my love, right there!”

“Yeah?” He grinned, leaning in to kiss you hard just as he started thrusting with even more force against the spot that had you unraveling the most, groaning into your mouth when your cunt started to repeatedly squeeze around his cock. “Feels so damn good when you squeeze my cock like that, darling. Keep that up.” He murmured into the kiss, his hands now holding your face while he continued his brutal yet delicious pace in thrusts. Being buried inside you grew to be Geta’s favorite place to be, especially when it had your cunt hugging his cock in the most delicious ways.

“L-love, choke me, please.” You begged with a moan as you gazed into his lust blown orbs, giving an even tighter squeeze around his length when his hand wrapped around your throat and gave a nice hard squeeze. His thrusts only faltered for a moment before he was resuming his bruising pace, his lips back on yours while he worked you both towards your releases, keeping a tight grip around your throat just like you wanted. “Yes, yes, yes, yes yes!” You chanted into the kiss, knowing it wouldn’t be long until you were creaming on his cock.

“Are you going to cum for me, darling? Make a nice big mess of my cock?” He leaned back then to watch his cock fuck in and out of you, his hand wrapped around your throat squeezing tighter so he could see the way your cunt clamped around his cock in response. Your rapid nodding of your head to answer his questions had him smirking, bringing his free hand down to press his thumb to your clit and start rubbing it in mind numbing circles. “Then cum for me.”

“Geeetaaaaaaa!” You squealed, your head thrown back and back arching off the bed as your orgasm took control of your body. You came harder than you ever have for him before, which had him letting out the most feral growl of approval when he felt just how creamy your cum made his cock. His release was only moments after yours, between the feeling of his cock so creamy and the way your walls continued clamping around him, he was done for.

His thrusts ceased once he was buried as deep into you as possible, his cock twitching as load after load of his cum spilled into you, wanting to make sure your insides were as creamy as his cock was. Your name left his lips as he came inside you, his own head tossed back as he relished in his own pleasure and the feeling of your cunt milking him of every drop he had to give. “That’s it, take every last drop of my cum.”

You leaned up to kiss him once more, your hands now grabbing his face and pulling him against you while you continued squeezing around his cock until he had nothing left to give. The two of you panted into each other’s mouths once your highs finally passed, your sweaty bodies pressed together still before he was peeling himself away from you and slowly pulling out of you to watch your mixed release drip out of your pretty little cunt. “Mmmmm...”

“Now this is a sight I will never tire of.” He mused with a long sigh of content, giving his lips a moistening lick before swiping some of your cum up with two fingers and finger fucking it back into you, grinning at the overstimulated whimper you let out in response. It was then that he finally moved your legs off of his shoulders, carefully placing them back onto the bed before moving to lay down beside you and pull you into his arms, his lips finding your temple while his hands gave soothing rubs up and down your back. “Are you okay?”

“Mmm... Perfect, actually. You never cease to amaze me, you know.” You smiled, nuzzling your face against the crook of his neck as you snuggled as close to him that you could. “Thank you. Not only for the mind blowing sex, but for loving me enough to not be afraid of having anyone who tries getting between us killed because trust me when I say, I would do the same for you.”

“Oh yeah?” Geta beamed, nudging his nose against the side of your head before pressing a kiss there. He was glad to hear you were on the same level as him, you truly were the only thing that mattered more to him than power, it’s why he was so afraid to lose you.

“Yeah. You truly are worth it, my love.”

“As are you. I love you, my sweet darling girl.”

“I love you.”

Thank you for reading! Comments and reblogs are encouraged and greatly appreciated! 🥺🖤

Fic tags: @userchai @3rd-conchord @multi-culti-girl @dreamyjosephquinn @peakygirl1919

[akutasoda]

salvation is unreachable, and your my salvation

synopsis - he never deserved you and so he hates you for it

includes - blade

warnings - gn!reader, angst, no comfort, wc - 1.2k

a/n: a little gift for my pookie @https-sourlimes although its probably a bit too angsty to be a gift..

blade abhorred you.

there was absolutely no doubt about that - from the way he spoke to you and how he physically looked irritated or somewhat angered to the way he always actively avoided running into you. although the last one wasn't the easiest of tasks as you did work together but that made the message even more clearer when you couldn't find him anywhere if he wasn't required to be there.

but you never understood why, neither did anyone that knew you two. blade was always the more secretive type of person, someone that never shared more than necessary so it was truly anyone's guess as to why he felt such strong feelings of detest toward you.

occasionally, someone would try and reassure you that he simply just didn't like anyone. however that was only partially true. blade clearly was not a people person and could be described as “intimidating” or even rather imposing, so it wasn't exactly a surprise that he glared at the average person or they found him to be a formidable presence.

but he wasn't like that with you, there was a very clear difference and it was so confusing to you. from the very first meeting with blade, you tried your absolute hardest to be nice to him and get along with your new co-workers. there was nothing that could be recalled that would cause him to behave in such a way to you.

although, as tragic as it may sound, you had gotten used to the way blade treated you - just because blade was always rude towards you didn't mean you should let that get you down, or even discourage you from being nice to him. but unknowingly, that was the problem.

there was once a man, a blacksmith, who was human. he was someone who had feelings that were mainly positive, someone who had a passion for his work - but he was no more. he had destroyed himself, in a way akin to how he used to melt down failed weapons, and then had painfully built himself back up to physically embody what he had once found a great joy in crafting.

he had become a weapon.

one armed with a similar blade that had once been used to pierce his body over and over, that caused him so much pain and suffering. killing any remaining remnants of the man he once was - any part of him that was still there after the mara spread through his very body and infected his mind.

and ever since that man had died. blade was born.

blade embodied all the pain and suffering that past figure caused. he wasn't used to any sort of positive feeling whether it be experiencing or receiving. and so when you came along, a positive presence that entered his life, blade wouldn't admit it, but it felt so foreign to him that it was scary.

blade would've preferred his first experience with you to be one of violence than you being genuinely kind to him. at least that would've been something he was used to, something familiar that would make him more likely to adjust to your presence quicker - but that affection that was so distant to him made it harder.

somewhere along the line, blade had noticed something different. the pure hatred he held for you had begun to morph into a foreign feeling that confused him - why was he feeling this way? what had evoked these feelings?

blade’s lack of comprehension when it came to figuring out his feelings wasn't doing him any favors. he couldn't figure out exactly what these feelings meant or even what they were and even though he desperately tried to push them away, they always came back stronger,

in all honesty, it scared him. so eventually it resulted in more anger resonating inside his mind, hatred that eventually became associated with you - before you came along, blade was somewhat content with his life as a weapon, it was simple. but now you entered his life and now he was experiencing all these confusing feelings that evoked more fear into him than any fight ever could.

so to him, the solution was simple. you needed to go. blade knew that was quite the impossible task to fulfill so he did the next best thing and tried to distance himself from you. limiting all your interactions and therefore limiting his exposure to your kindness.

although blade obviously was completely oblivious to the simple fact that he had developed some sort of “crush” on you - so the solution wasn't as simple as avoiding you. blade would soon find that out by the fact that you consumed his thoughts,

blade despised you.

more accurately, despised the fact that he probably could pick you out in a sea of people, that he could recognise your voice anywhere. blade hated how he visibly unconsciously perked up at the sight of you before immediately resuming his usual facade, how he would occasionally catch himself thinking about you.

he detested you. so why was he slowly becoming more welcome to your presence?

why had his plan to avoid you slowly devolved into him doing the exact opposite?

however, you had interpreted this as him finally coming around to you - something that was somewhat accurate but blade didn't want you to notice his sudden change in behavior. you noticed the small signs that slipped through his facade and you secretly were overjoyed that he finally had stopped seemingly hating you.

although, you didn't change how you acted around him. a small part of you was scared that it may destroy the progress you two had made. maybe he truly did just need some more time to get used to you being around, get accustomed to your presence?

but blade was no better off. spending even that little bit more time with you had led to those unknown feelings brewing inside him grow even more. they consumed his brain and what was left of his heart, warm, fuzzy feelings that he wished to desperately rip from his body - for the first time, he even began wishing that his mara would begin to act up and bring some sense back to him.

although there seemed to be nothing blade could do to drag himself away from you. he began craving your presence, wishing to hear your voice and admire you. each time these thoughts consumed him, he quickly caught himself and tried bringing some semblance of sense back to his mind.

and so he resorted to what he knew best - violence.

he could try and block out the pain and betrayal in your eyes when he drew his blade at you, pointing it directly at your heart.

he could try and convince himself that it wasn't him who was spitting insults and threats at you. words that seemed to be pure words of hatred and disgust but really masked the pure affection and longing he had for you.

but he was scared. loving you would mean letting you past his walls and facades, showing you the very little human sides of him that remained intact and could experience vulnerability. but letting you in was exactly what those parts of him would want.

unfortunately, blade hated you.

he hated longing for the life that he could have with you. he hated how you made him feel.

and even if he did accept his feelings, you deserve someone better - perhaps the man he once was, not the just the fractured remnants.

taglist - @little-miss-chaoss, @frankiesteinn

[lemotmo]

🙃 but also 😂😂

Q. Do you agree that Oliver has behaved unprofessionally throughout this entire process?

A. Absolutely not. Oliver is the one that maintained his professionalism. He refused to pretend that a plot device was more than a plot device. That was the professional approach. He refused to play along with nonsense and grandstanding. That was the professional approach. He has been a main part of this show for 8 years and he has always conducted himself appropriately. Period. Lou's shameful, downright embarrassingly unprofessional behavior is not Oliver's fault. He was cast as a plot device. He was well aware of this. He even acknowledged it in his first few interviews last season. He admitted Tommy was a 'starter' relationship. He said Tommy was there to allow Buck to work out the kinks before Eddie. He fucking said those words. He was under no illusion his part was anything more. He got paid by delusional, racist fans to pretend he was something more than what he was, and he talked himself into believing he was the shit he told them he was. Oliver and the show are doing him a favor by ignoring his behavior and the appalling behavior he's encouraging all 340 of his fans to engage in. Oliver could come out and say that he was the most unprofessional, talentless, narcissistic, racist, homophobic piece of shit he ever had the misfortune of having to share space with. The fact that he hasn't said those things publicly, because they're all true statements, is the epitome of professionalism. He got cast as a temporary love interest. He got cast as a minimal plot point. He got cast as the definition of a plot device. He had to be talked through their first kissing scene. They then only had one more before he went to Tim and said he wouldn't do anymore intimate scenes 'because they're unnecessary and don't add any value'. Which was code for I'm not comfortable doing any of those things with a man. They did not get along. It was obvious. They had less than zero chemistry. It worked on no level other than the one Lou manufactured. End of story. Oliver was never the problem. Ryan was never the problem. Oliver is allowed his opinions on Buck's storylines. Other than Tim, Oliver's opinion is the only one that matters. Lou gets zero opinion. He's a z-list nepo baby that they clearly couldn't wait to get off their set. Oliver treated him with more respect and professional courtesy than the man ever came close to deserving.

Thank you Nonny!

Over the last couple of days I've seen an increasing amount of Tommies turning on Oliver, accusing him of all sorts of things, while excusing Lou's behaviour and even praising him as some kind of perfect man who can do no wrong.😠

It's insane behaviour that needs and deserves to be called out.

Lou has a past of racist and sexist behaviour as evidenced by those awful posts he made on social media (Twitter and Instagram). But apparently all is forgiven and forgotten because he kissed another man on a TV-show. 🤷‍♀️🤦‍♀️ Make it make sense.

The man pushed his fanbase to relentlessly harass other fans, cast and crew, by making them all believe that his part in a show was so much more than it actually was. It was so bad at a certain point that some of the cast and crew had to block these people and Tim actually publicly called out his fans for bringing along so much new toxicity.

I won't even get back into the horrible shit (death threats and all) they dropped in my ask box and those false accusations they made at my (and some other Buddie fans) address, complete with elaborately fabricated false evidence.

It all comes down to this: the man was hired as a plot device. A way to have Buck come out as bisexual. He was okay with that in the beginning, but soon realised he could make money of this opportunity by scamming his own fanbase. He made these crazy cameos talking nonsense and headcanons, telling his fans what they wanted to hear, telling them lies for money.

He took the gift of a part in the top TV-show of the moment and instead of being grateful for this gift, he used it to manipulate and lie. He abused the trust of the people who gave him this chance in the first place.

He's still doing this to this day by the way, egging these people on to mass-harass the official 911onABC account on Instagram by having them post insane hashtags. As if Tim will ever allow that man to set foot again on the 911 set.🤣

Lou made sure to burn the final bridge by giving his last and frankly unhinged interview. This interview ensured that he is NEVER coming back. Good riddance. 😏

Ultimately, the story of season 7 was about Buck coming out and getting more comfortable in his own skin. It was about him having all of these big feelings, but being unsure who they were for and why he was having them. It was about his own bisexuality. Nothing more, nothing less.

Oliver knew this and respected the storyline, knowing how important it was (and still is) for so many bisexual people. He never made it about a love interest. He only briefly mentioned Tommy once or twice, but never said anything else about the relationship, because he knew that the man wasn't going to stick around and he didn't want to lead the fans on. Which is admirable.

He was the one who was always professional, even when he was forced to work together with a man who had never heard of the word 'professionalism'. Having that man play his love interest must have been difficult, but instead of complaining or whining (like Lou did and still does) Oliver has never once uttered an unkind word about him. Which tells me enough about the strength of his character.

I'm disgusted by people 'calling out' Oliver as unprofessional when all he has ever done was be as professional as he could be. These people need to go back and watch some of Lou's cameos. They'll quickly be confronted by the very definition of 'unprofessionalism'.

'nough said. Sorry for the rant, but the way these people are talking trash about Oliver right now? It just pisses me off so much! And I don't get pissed off so easily. But this makes my blood boil!

IMPORTANT! Please don't repost this ask and/or a link that leads straight to my Tumblr account on Twitter or any other social media. Thank you!

Heads up! For anyone who is giving me the shifty eyes for reposting Ali's updates instead of reblogging. Read this.

Remember, no hate in comments, reblogs or inboxes. Let's keep it civil and respectful. Thank you.

If you are interested in more of Ali’s posts, you can find all of her posts so far under the tag: anonymous blog I love.

[mdzs-owns-my-ass-i-guess]

Why not me?

Visiting the new PIDW canon altered Bingge's brain chemistry.

It haunted Luo Bingge for weeks - that version of Shen Qingqiu, that kind, loving smile, his soft, fond eyes, his tender touch, the plush of his lips and that indignant but pliant way in which he submitted to Luo Bingge's aggressive kiss...

It haunted him every moment of every day, even more so at night, ever since it happened - and neither of his many wives managed to entice him or distract him, their presence suddenly irritating him to the point that he forbade any of them to visit him, including his otherwise esteemed wife.

Seeing these women felt at best empty, at worst, repulsive. He couldn't bear anybody's touch on his skin, not after having felt the way that Shen Qingqiu had held and touched him. Not after having realized that it was only when he felt those loving hands on his body that he had ever felt any semblance of comfort.

How?

How had the cruel, abusive man that Luo Bingge had suffered much pain and humiliatin at the hands of, turned into someone so kind and sweet? What happened? What changed?

And what about himself then? That version of himself, that pathetic, glass-hearted creature, how had he not become like Luo Bingge at all? He had surely shared the same fate, Bingge could tell, his version of Shen Qingqiu threw him into the Abyss as well! So why was he not vengeful? Had he not wanted to seek retribution, revenge for his suffering?!

But above all of that, the question that plagued Luo Bingge more than anything was... why not me?

Why did I not get the kind version of shizun?

Why wasn't I treated kindly?

Why couldn't I have that?

Why did I not deserve that?

Sometimes, he replayed that kiss in his head - the simmering passion he had felt in Shen Qingqiu's lips, the way he melted against Luo Bingge as if he was someone he loved - that love and desire between them that Bingge could have had no problem pretending was his and not the other version's.

It made him feel something that no woman in his harem ever had, not even the one he had chosen as his wife.

It made him realize something that made him feel sick.

He had always loved Shen Qingqiu. He had all but screamed to him - love me, love me, why won't you love me? So many seem to find it so easy to love me, why not you? Why not me?! - but all he got in exchange was hatred and vitriol, anger and humiliation.

It hadn't been the abuse, the pain or even the Abyss that turned Luo Bingge dark - no. It had been something far simpler, far more pathetic than he wanted to admit it.

Heartbreak.

And though he thought he had avenged himself, with Shen Qingqiu rotting in the basement of his palace with nothing but his venomous tongue left, meeting that gentle version of his shizun had broken Luo Bingge's heart once again, perhaps even more than it had ever been before.

--

"Why not me?"

Shen Qingqiu glared at his former disciple, scoffing. He did not feel like replying, and did not care to find out what Bingge was on about either.

"Why were you never kind to me?"

Shen Qingqiu scoffed again. "Kind? To a beast?"

Bingge's fists clenched, veins popping on the back of his fists. A beast? Had that other version of himself not been a beast too? He was loved, why wasn't Bingge?

"There is no world in which I would have seen you as anything but worthless and repulsive!"

"There is." Bingge replies, eerily calm, even doning a small, derisive, knowing smile. "There is a world in which you're not a monster. And I am not either."

Shen Qingqiu nearly laughed, that bitter, horrible laugh of his. "As if you'd deserve a world like that."

Luo Bingge had grown used to this, to his former shizun's harsh tongue, to the words Bingge responded to with causing him so much pain that his screams echoed off the palace.

But somehow, it hurt more that day. Because out of all the filth and the insults Shen Qingqiu had hurled his way along the years, to hear those words had been the most painful to hear.

Because it was true. It was true, and Bingge knew it - even that kind, loving version of shizun wouldn't have loved him. He had known it even when he asked that Shen Qingqiu to come with him to his world.

He wouldn't have.

Bingge thought back to that other version of himself. The way he protected his shizun, the fierceness in his eyes as he stared at Bingge and the love in them every time he looked at his Shen Qingqiu, the enormity of his love that bordered obsession. Worship.

It was something Bingge understood without even needing proof - that version of himself loved Shen Qingqiu beyond understanding, beyond limit.

Perhaps even beyond death.

The Shen Qingqiu now staring at Bingge would not have known what to do with such a love.

"You wouldn't deserve it either."

I had it. Shen Qingqiu thought to himself, bitterly, but he didn't pursue the thought further.

[lovingperfectionsblog]

Hate me please.

PLEASE READ THE WARNINGS AND PLEASE READ WITH CAUTION! - Minors do not interact. 

Art Donaldson x Reader.

Summary: Art confronts you about your eating disorder.

Warning: Eating disorder, fight, angst, crying, swearing, talking about someone getting admitted. 

Word count: 2072. 

Authors note: Guys, this is about an eating disorder. This is in no way glamourising them. My aim is always to bring awareness to the actual feelings around them and how difficult it actually is to navigate them. Please note, where I live, someone can get you admitted to an institution for numerous reasons provided a medical professional feels you are dangerous to yourself or those around you. This is the premise this story falls under. Eating disorders are, and this is from a doctor, as severe as addiction and needs to be treated accordingly! If you or anyone else you know is facing this, please seek out medical help! There are a ton of amazing resources out there to help you! And most importantly, please be kind. To yourself and to others. You are worth the help, always. The world is good and kind and you deserve to be in it. This piece of fiction is also cathartic for me. I am dealing with my own mental health stuff and this helps me. 

Please remember, you are in-charge of the media you consume. If you do not like it, do not read it. Please do not consume this if you are currently in a bad mental health space. Please take care of yourself. And my inbox is always open if you feel there is some way I could improve on getting this message across (Again, be kind, I am also just a person going on my own experience) or if you need to chat about anything. Be safe and remember, you deserve love and kindness, especially from yourself. 

____________

You knew you hadn’t expected anything good, but you hadn’t expected this. You thought that maybe there would be some screaming. Maybe he would pack up and leave. Maybe he should leave you. That’s what you had expected as you sat on the couch, just waiting for Art to come storming through the door, ready for him to leave you. 

What you hadn’t expected was for the door to slowly open, hearing the click of the handle as it was pushed downwards from the outside and slowly allowing a stream of light to filter in to the previously dark apartment. Art was near silent as he made his way into the space you were both currently staying as he prepared for his next tournament. 

You heard the thump of his bag as it slipped off his shoulder and the soft rustle as he toed off his shoes. After that, it was as if he just stopped moving altogether. You would have assumed he wasn’t even in the apartment anymore; he was so silent. All the way up until you heard him sigh. 

He was going to leave you. 

And maybe that’s exactly what you deserved. Maybe you knew that all along. It had to have been the reason you did all of this in the first place. You knew you didn’t deserve Art and so you tried to create a version of yourself that did. A skinnier, prettier version of yourself.

Skinny and pretty like Tashi. 

Skinny and pretty like Art deserved. 

You had to stop yourself from glancing up as he walked into the lounge. You could feel his eyes on you, but you sat, forcing yourself to stare out of th large double doors in front of you. You watched as the city lights twinkled and you could;t help but think about the last time you saw fireflies. You were significantly younger. You’d been sitting alone in your parents yard and suddenly one of the denser bushes lit up, slowly, but it lit up. One by one, they started to shine. Just like the stars at night. One by one. Just like the city below. The lights beginning to illuminate the darkened world. One by one. 

One by one, just like Arts footsteps as he made his way towards the lightswitch. The entire room is illuminated by a single flip of a switch. It was an assault to your senses. The bright warmth absorbs the dark. Absorbing the twinkling lights of the city below. Suddenly, all you could see in the big glass panes was your reflection and for a brief moment you could see how gaunt your face looked and you could see how far your collar bones protrude through the skin that encased them, but the longer you looked, it was almost as if a sculpture was placing more and more clay onto the statue you so painstakingly carved out. You can see each and every point of weight being put back on and your brain justifies it all again. Suddenly, you remembered you deserved this. That Art deserved this. He was a pro-athlete for god sake, which pro-athlete wouldn’t want a skinny, pretty partner? 

That brief moment where you know how sick you are, you think he might hate this for you, but the sculpture and the clay and suddenly you can’t believe you thought that at all. 

Your reflection was obscured as Art came to a stop in front of you and you dragged your eyes up, from the bottom of his shorts, your favourite pair of his, all the way up to his mouth. The one that was so often upturned into that sweet, sweet smile you first fell in love with. It always seemed so innocent. Always seemed so pure. Now though, set in a  hard line, but they kept the words behind them as if under lock and key. Art not allowing a word to slip past them until he was sure about what he was going to say.  It couldn’t have been anything good if his message was anything to go by; 

‘I need to talk to you.’

All you had to do was unlock your phone and you’d see the message glaring back at you. The message that you were sure was the beginning of he end. 

Eventually your gaze reached his eyes, much to your dismay. You didn’t want to because you were sure that the second you did, it would kick off the entire ending into gear, but you did it anyway and there were his red rimmed eyes. 

It truly was the beginning of the end

You watched his mouth open and shut, but it was the moment that he cleared his throat that brought you out of your thoughts. Like a rope had been wrapped around you and yanked, forcing you back. 

He wasn’t looking at you anymore and you could see the tears threatening to escape, he cleared his throat again and your stomach turned as you heard his voice waver. 

“I spoke to Maddy.” Fucking Maddy. Of course she had said something to him. “I’ve taken some time off and we’re going to get you some help.” 

The co fusion on your face was what pushed the tear over the waterline and as he dragged his hand down his face, the tear was spread. You watched as he darted his tongue out, you assume catching he last little bits of it. You wondered if they were as salty to the taste as your own so often were. 

“You need help baby.” He crouched down in front of you, engulfing your hands in his own. 

“You spoke to Maddy?” When? What had they said that concerned you? 

“Yeah, we’re all worried about you. You need help my love.” It’s as if he thought that repeating himself was going to make you understand, but it didn’t, you sat, still just as confused. 

“Why are you taking time off?” You couldn’t understand. Why did he even need to take time off? 

“We’re,” Why did he need to keep clearing his throat? It’s not like he was the one currently  being out under a microscope. “We’ve got a plan baby, and I just, I need you to know that.” 

“What plan? What are you talking about?” Your brain wasn’t catching up to what was happening and for some reason, you were growing irrationally angry. The more he refused to just spit it out, the more agitated you became. 

“Remember that place we spoke about a little while ago. That place up north in France? The one with some of the best doctors in the world, that help with,” The pause was enough to kill you. He wasn’t going anywhere. He was sending you away. 

“I really don’t think I’m in need of a place like that.” Confusion was still ever present in the conversation and it seeped into every word. You watched as Art mulled over the next words in his head. 

“The institution.” He said it so quietly, but the words stuck through you like a knife. He was actively sending you away to an institution because he thought you were sick. 

“I am not being sent to an institution Art.” You moved to storm out but the panic and what you assume was a lack of food kept you planted in your seat. Those dizzy spots blurring your vision. If you waited another second they’d be gone. They always went away after a few seconds. ALways. Art dropped his head, gaze focused between hus knees, a shaky breathe leaving him. You could feel the exhale on your calves. 

“It’s not up to you.” It was so quiet you almost missed it and when you didn’t respond, Art tentatively peaked up, the betrayal evident in your eyes. 

“It’s not up to me? How the fuck could being admitted not be up to me?” You could feel your face and neck beginning to heat up. From anger or shame, you weren’t sure which, but you could feel it crawling up under your skin and if Arts’ facial expression was anything to go by, he knew it too. 

Art could feel the anger radiating off of you but this is exactly what he had expected. He had gone behind your back, spoken to his personal therapist. Honestly, Maddy had been the one who had brought it up with him, and he was ashamed he hadn’t realized how severe it was. How sick you actually were. He and MAddy had discussed a variety of options and in your case, she was sure she could get you admitted no problem and that’s exactly what they did. 

And now he had to do the hard part of letting you know. He had his bag packed and now he just needed to convince you that you needed to pack yours too.

“Why would you do this to me?” The ay this was all going, it felt as if you weren’t all that willing to put up a fight. He could live wit you hating him, with thinking he did all of this to hurt you, but he couldn’t live hu,mself if he did nothing to help you and he lost you because of it. So hating him it is. 

“Because I can’t lose you.” He could see how confused you were at that statement and it all hit him like a ton of bricks. You had no idea. You didn’t realize just how bad you had gotten. 

“You aren't going to.” You were shocked into silence as he abruptly stood up, leg bouncing as he stood in front of you. 

“ I am going to though. You just don’t see it. And just because you don’t see it, doesn’t make it any less true.”  The words just came tumbling out of his mouth before he could give himself anytime to think them through. “I am going to lose you because you’re killing yourself and I don’t know why or how to make it better.” The words filled the room within seconds and you felt your throat begin to constrict. Is this what he had thought? 

Next thing you knew you were standing toe to toe with the man you loved “I am not going to die.” 

“Then pack your bag and come with me.” His request was instantaneous and you felt sick. You knew you had to do what he said, yu’d done so much of this for him already, but suddenly, you didn't want to give it up anymore. You knew you’d worked hard for this. What was the difference between what Art did to his body and what you did to yours? They were both simply acts of devotion, weren’t they?

“You have a match soon though.” Any excuse to get out of this. You just needed to remind him what was important to him. “I pulled out. I’d fucking quit if thats what it took. I’d do anything. I just need you to get better.” it was a sobering moment for you. You’d always thought that you came second to the true great love of Ar Donaldsons life, but here he stood, saying the most tragic yet beautiful thing possible, that it was never tennis. It was, is, you. He wasn’t scared of losing the game, but losing you, the thought brought him to his knees. 

You turned and made your way to the bedroom, unable to look at him through the tears, that is until he called out for you. What you werre doing, all of it, took courage, even the part where you had to turn and face Art now. 

“Please.” God, he had never felt so small in his entire life, but he reckoned that the really monumental moments in life always would, to show you the grand importance of them was even greater than what you could ever be. And Art had never felt as small as he did in this moment. 

Art didn’t know what relief was until he heard you say that you were going to pack a bag. Wasn't even ashamed to admit that the next words left him feeling a sense of relief too because he knew what you actually meant. 

“I’m going to hate you for a while for this.” 

I'm scared, but I will try. 

“For as long as you need.” 

I will be with you through it all.

[xo-myloves]

I have another request but i dont wanna be the weird bitch who keeps asking for imagines lmao 😫😫😫😫 but like if you ever feel like it and you don't need to write it right now or anything BUT IF YOU WANT TO could you do a slash(him rn, oldie) imagine when y/n is friends with london and his relationship isnt going well so Y/N is like his young side bitch LMAO 👉👈😮‍💨 so whenever he fights with his wife he comes to you and like you cook for him and you watch movies etc and y/n makes him feel young and whatever else and HOT!!!!!!!!!!! I WANT THIS MAN NAKED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I really love your writing btw 🫶

it’s okay request as much as you want 😋

(Omg this photo from when he was in velvet revolver🙂‍↔️)

WARNING ‼️ (smut, fingering, pet names, overstimulation, age gap,) I think that’s all🥲

𝚂𝙸𝙳𝙴 𝙸𝚂𝙽𝚃 𝙰𝙻𝚆𝙰𝚈𝚂 𝙱𝙰𝙳

I’ve been friends with this guy named London, he used to go to my high school until we graduated, and we stayed in touch, and guess fucking what, this motherfuckers dad was slash.

Yes the slash.

The fucking guitar player for Guns ‘N’ Roses, my favorite band of all time, I grew up on them, my dad basically raised me on them, and I even started playing guitar because of slash, and now I knew the fucker?

Did I tell London this? No fucking way, he would never let me over, it had to be obvious though, every time I go over there, I’m like a horny spaze over his father, and best believe when I graduated, I lived there basically, did slash have a wife. Yes.

That’s didn’t fucking stop me.

I would always be around him, like a lost puppy, London didn’t notice as much, but slash had too. It was pathetic, wearing subjective clothing, and showing off my breasts since I knew he had a thing for them, it’s not like I haven’t seen his instagram.

But it didn’t seem wrong, we were close, did his wife hate me? Fucking probably, but I honestly didn’t care, she was a bitch to him, and I know I could treat him better.

All I wanted was to be with that man, he was everything I ever wanted, he was a huge horror movie fan, loved music, fucking played the music I loved, and we loved a lot of the same topics, and when I would sleepover, I would go downstairs, knowing slash was a night owl, we would just sit on his couch and talk for hours.

Recently something has been off, London didn’t want to tell me, but I could tell slash and meegan were having problems, I heard them arguing earlier in the day, I tried to talk to him, but he pushed me away, he didn’t want to talk to anyone, it honestly made me upset.

All I wanted was to hold him and play with his hair and tell him how great he is, how he doesn’t deserve her, how I could be better. I can be better. I would be better.

And tonight was like any other night, I was sleeping over at Londons house, I was sitting in his room, bored as all hell, he was out, snoring and everything, so I made my way downstairs, originally wanting to get water, but kinda wishing slash was down there. Maybe I could talk to him about everything.

I tried to be quiet walking down the stairs, they were always so damn creaky.

As I made my way down to the stairs, I heard panting almost? I was confused, as I got to the bottom step, I saw the back of slash head, only his silhouette, since the TV was on, it lit him up.

But his head was throw back, and I realized he was the one that was panting, I got closer to only see him jerking himself off, my legs almost gave up on themselves.

My heat pooled, felt like it was going down my legs, I put my hand over my mouth, trying not to make a sound, but I had a wave of confidence go threw my body, and I walked right up to him, standing in front of him.

Trying not to cringe at myself, I hated being confident, but around him, I felt like I could.

“Oh shit, fuck, sorry.” Slash looked up in worry, covering himself, getting the blanket next to him, I started nodding my head “no” right away.

“No, no, no it’s okay, let me help.” I whispered the last part, sitting down next to him, he raised an eyebrow, I tried to put my head in his thigh and I wanted to rub it up to his member, but he stopped my hand with his.

His eyes went big, I could see his member through the blanket, my pussy was throbbing at this point, “y/n… come on, you know we can’t.” He had a smile on his face, it almost like he wanted too, but he knew he couldn’t.

I smiled at him back, there was so much sexual tension, it wasn’t even funny, are hands were still on top of each others, “slash, let me make you feel good.” I whined to him, squeezing his hand slightly, he looked around, then grabbed my waist, putting me in his lap, grabbing my face, and slamming his lips onto mine.

I felt euphoric. I felt like I was on cloud 9, I have always wanted this moment, for fucking years. Feeling his shaft under me, was… I couldn’t even explain.

His hands traveled to my ass, his hands were soft, yet rough, he massaged my ass softly, kissing down my neck, I couldn’t help myself from grinding on him, I saw his eyebrow go up, “you’re one eager little girl, aren’t ya?” He spoke in a soft deep tone.

“I can’t help it, I mean, look where we are.” I giggled, putting my hands around his neck, titling my head, looking into his eyes, before grinding one more time, it was so fucking amazing, I felt him. Since he only had the blanket under him.

“Can you be quiet?” He grinned, kissing my lips once more, slinging his hand that was previously on my ass to the front of my stomach, I looked down as he started to play with the hem of my shorts.

I nodded my head, biting my lips barely, all I needed was him. I needed something. Anything.

He smiled, pulling down my shorts, I lifted up, leaving them on the ground, leaving my only in my Lacey black thongs, his finger tips went down to my clit, playing with it so softly.

My lips parted at his action, my eyes had a glaze over them, he licked his lips, loving how he had me, only after a few touch’s. “Just stay quiet doll.” He smiled, laying a kiss my exposed neck.

I gave a small whimper in response, he brought his full fingers to my clit, rubbing it roughly now, his other hand was behind my neck now, making me look at him.

“Does this feel good honey?” He was so soft, so gentle. I loved every moment. “Yes, yes, it really does.” I whined, as he slide his fingers down to my entrance, teasing it softly, before slipping his middle finger into me.

Pumping it in and out, making me moan quietly, I gasped when he pushed his second digit into me. “Stay quiet, you don’t wanna get in trouble? Don’t ya? We wouldn’t want that now.” He smirked, bringing my head to the crook of his neck.

After he said those words, I was invested, I needed to know what “trouble” was, whatever it was or is, I needed it. Now.

Soooo I started moaning louder, louder than I should’ve, even though I was in his neck, it was definitely still audible, he pulled me by my hair to make me look at him.

“I told you to be quiet, now shut the fuck up.” He gritted through his teeth, I didn’t even notice that he took off the blanket, pulling his fingers out of me, whining at the lost of him, and then he just slammed into me, giving me now warning, and his thrusts were fast and hard.

He wasn’t stopping anytime soon.

My eyes shoot open, mouth parted wider, and I brought myself closer to him. He grabbed my ass, pounding into me, his hand that was on my hair, is now on my mouth, forcing me to be quiet.

Fuck this is going to be a long night.

𝙾𝙽𝙴 𝙷𝙾𝚄𝚁 𝙻𝙰𝚃𝙴𝚁

“FUCK SLASH, NO MORE, IM SO FUCKING SENSITIVE!” I yelled at the top of my lungs, we were in his bedroom now, he had me bent over his bed, still pounding into me, I already cummed four times…

I know.

I felt a hand slap my ass, and I went to look back, his head was fully back, his thrusts got sloppy, I knew he was close, finally.

He grabbed my hips, using me, not caring what I said, it’s not like it didn’t feel good. It was so much at once.

I loved every moment.

“S-SHIT FUCK.” His voice got higher, shooting his seed into me, coating my walls, my legs trembling, I felt his body weight in my back, after he came he just laid on top of me for a good minute. I giggled softly, at this action, he rolled over next to me, looking to the side at me.

“Well, that was…. Um, unexpected.” He chuckled, moving his hair off his sweaty forehead, grabbing my waist, bringing me closer to his sweaty torso. “ I’ve always wanted to do that.” I mumbled under my breath, he scooted up the bed, laying in the middle of the bed with me in his big muscular arms, his hair tickling my shoulder.

“I know, I know.” He laughed, kissing my cheek, before getting off the bed. “Where ya going?” I looked up, he smiled at me, “I’m fucking showering, I have too many body fluids on me.” I laughed at his joke, realizing he was right.

fuck that was a night.

𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝙽𝙴𝚇𝚃 𝙼𝙾𝚁𝙽𝙸𝙽𝙶

after a good night sleep in slash’s arms, his shampoo filling my nostrils, having clean clothes on both of our body’s, I was worried his wife was going to walk in on us, but thank fuck she wasn’t coming home anytime soon, she went on a business trip or whatever slash said, I kinda zoned out.

While he was still sleeping like a baby, I decided to be the wife he should have, making him a hearty warm breakfast, when I started cooking the bacon, he immediately got up, walking to the kitchen.

“Are you cooking?” Slash said in a sleepy tone, leaning against the counter, tilting his head, with a big smile on his face, I nodded my head, not looking away from the pan, scared I was going to get burned.

I felt a pair of arms wrap around my waist, and a kiss on my neck, “you doing this for me doll?” He spoke in a whisper tone, my heart felt so warm at his touch.

“I wanted to show you, I could be a better wife.” I heard a deep chuckle from him, making my panties getting wet all over again, even though my body was covered with bruises, hickeys, marks, anything imaginable.

“You proved that last night doll.”

(Sorry it took so long)

[newtonsheffield]

I saw wicked tonight and my GOD. How did Cynthia sound like she was singing right in the room with me?! Those costumes?!? Cynthia's flawless American accent?!? THOSE SETS?! Johnathan Bailey living his best slutty himbo with a sensitive side life. I was so excited to see Ariana cuz havent seen her act since victorious and boy was I SO HAPPY SHES SO GOOD AT THAT SHIT. The Kristin Idina cameo?! KRISTINS WAND NOT WORKING TILL SHE SMACKED IT ON IDINA's?!? All the facial expressions and emotion you could actually SEE btw Glinda and Elphaba during defying gravity every time they said i hope you're happy now!!!! The way i almost clapped at the end bc i forgot it was a movie and not an actual play?! CYNTHIA ERIVO ONE MORE TIME?!?

The entire film was stunning.

I think I’m gonna go again at the end of this week because it’s a six day week and I deserve a treat.

I was just listening to the soundtrack on the way home and defying gravity is breathtaking in its entirety but Ariana’s last “I Hope you’re happy.” While people are calling for her only real friend to be killed? When she knows she can’t take Elphaba’s path with her because she’s never been a rule breaker, and she can’t now. Because she wants so badly to be taken seriously and that’s what The Wizard is offering her. Finally, she’s getting the acceptance from Madame Morrible she craved. That’s why she’s staying. And she feels like she can be a good person in a flawed system.

“I hope you’re happy.”

ONE MORE FUCKING TIME FROM THE TOP PLEASE

[hyperfixationcritter]

#THANK YOU.#again the characters only hold value so much as they're useful to the white people around them#performing emotional physical and magical labour for them despite rarely getting the same themselves#it was especially egregious with mel this season and last bc we see her support jayce's raggedy ass CONSTANTLY#but he rarely if ever does the same for her#and the ONE time when it really would've counted this season even if they did break up in the end the show had him#try to beat her up and then talk shit to her face and she wasn't allowed to push back. gross gross gross.#but yay y'all got your white x spicy white yaoi so all is well with he world. fuck that tbqh.#as for ekko some of the writing was so bizarre with the 'what would you do without her' nonsense#like actually ekko was the boy saviour who started a resistance group of orphaned zaunite kids providing care#community and livelihood to those in need WITHOUT jinx/powder.#almost the entirety of ep7 was about ekko being there to further jinx's arc twice over.#all this to say jayviks now claiming they lurvee mel and have always lurved her bc they 'won' is grossly transparent to me#keep the same energy mfs#the weakness of the season was harmful to all the characters but it's doubly so with these two#bc of how they're positioned in the story and by fandom#and how the way ppl talk about them only lays bare the issues op pointed out#mel medarda#ekko#you both deserved a better show and more stories#hope we get to see you soon#arcane

EXACTLY, she's one of my favorite characters on the show and had the potential to have this kind of arc. And like, I like the secret magic stuff too but it was rushed (and I honestly preferred the theories of her being revived/blessed in the womb vs just being born with magic from a mystery magical parent). I definitely think dealing with racism in fandom made it harder to talk about Mel's actual flaws when everyone else was tryna make her evil incarnate for just existing while black and in the way of a white mlm ship (I know Jayce is latino coded but you can be white and latino like his voice actor and idk if the showrunners wanted him to be perceived as explicitly brown or not given the ways the west is about viewing lation as a race and the ways fandom treats him is a mix of both white when he's in a mlm ship and they wanna dunk on Mel and brown when they're mad at him, at least that's what i think)

(reblogging this again for all these good additions. I added my part at the end in the replies but felt like reblogging it too)

I don’t know how to say this exactly but like… fandom and show are kinda weird about Mel and Ekko and it is very much rooted in racism

[lastoneout]

Been watching that long ass takedown of Lily Orchard's old SU video and my god I will never be over how she just like, continuously calls a queer jewish woman a nazi for *checks notes* having the main character of her PG children's show find a non-violent solution to the main conflict instead of just immediately killing the big bad guys.

[teh-inggris]

pvp civ nation...... this aint much but pls take my contribution for this series bc im going insane i love hate this man so much get him out of my head

[beetlethebug]

consider,,,a lucanis who is in love with emmrich, a spite who is in love with rook, a rook in love with emmrich, and emmrich who is in love with all three but wants lucanis, spite, and rook to get together because he feels he is not the type of man any of them deserve...

bonus points for spite being the one to realize just what sort of love quadrilateral is going on and is the one to get them all together.