#and is undeniably a silly movie (it has its emotional moment but still)

[overly-hubristic-mad-scientist]

We need to make superhero media silly again

[mrsalwayswrite]

Singing in the Shower (Ragnarssons x Reader)

This is just a silly little one-shot that came to mind that I could not stop thinking about. It got a bit deeper than I planned but oops?

Also my first time writing a Ragnarssons x reader! Please let me know if I did all the brothers justice. Except Bjorn isn’t in here. So its just the sons of Aslaug. Sorry, Bjorn.  

Warnings: some brief mentions of abusive/unhealthy past relationships, reader has some insecurities, the brothers being the best roomies ever but also creepers, like one or two swear words, FLUFFY GOODNESS!!! 

Words: 3700

Tag List: @youbloodymadgenius​

 (picture is from Pinterest. Not mine.)

The sound of laughter echoed around you even before leaving your bedroom. It was a Sunday night so that meant the Lothbrok brothers were all over. A tradition Ubbe started some months ago to make sure the four brothers stayed connected in each other's lives. Every Sunday evening, all of them would congregate in the three bedroom flat you shared with Ubbe and Hvitserk. They would order a stack of pizzas and enough beer to put a pub crawl to shame, and watch movies or play video games until the early morning hours. Only twice had fist fights broken out between Sigurd and Ivar with just a table and a lamp damaged in the process, so Ubbe called it a win. 

 It had only been about a year that you lived with Ubbe and Hvitserk. Sigurd chose to move in with a couple members of the band he played in. Aslaug vehemently refused to let Ivar move out due to his many medical needs that she claimed he could only receive proper attention for at home. In equal parts rebellion and to escape his mother’s suffocating attention, Ivar spent the majority of his free time and nights crashing on the couch at your shared flat. 

 At first, you were hesitant about living with the two brothers, having only known them through friends, but you decided to give it a chance. Within a couple of months, you found the strange dynamics of your shared space and your vastly different relationships with each of the brothers to feel eerily familiar….like being home. 

 Standing at your door, you listened to the brothers for a few moments, smiling broadly as you heard Hvitserk taunting Sigurd about how he was going to beat his ass if he threw another blue shell at him. Meanwhile Ivar was yelling something about the undeniable magic of Yoshi and his winning streak. They must be playing Mario Kart again. 

 It was nice to hear them all getting along. Normally Sunday nights you hung out with your boyfriend to give the brothers privacy, even though all of them repeatedly told you it was unnecessary. That was until last week. You had taken a selfie on your boyfriend's phone and went to set it as his background to surprise him….and found nude pictures of other girls and the dick pics he sent them back. Before you stormed out of his flat, you may have thrown his phone against the wall, pleased when the screen shattered just like your trust. Then you came home and cried to Hvitserk about how you were swearing off men and just wanted to be a spinster for the rest of your life. 

 Word must have spread between the brothers. For the rest of the week, they all offered their support in various ways. Sigurd texted you a few times to check on you and remind you that clearly you were better off without your ex. Ubbe gave you long hugs as if trying to soak the pain out of you, and made sure you were eating and getting out of bed. Hvitserk surprised you with a new sugary treat every day ranging from Oreos to ice cream to chocolate muffins; then you two would cuddle on the couch indulging yourselves while watching movies. Ivar threatened to beat up your now ex-boyfriend for making you cry and take pictures to send to those girls your ex had been texting. You made sure to shut Ivar's idea down quickly but pressed a quick kiss to his cheek and thanked him for offering. You hated your ex, that did not mean you wanted him dead. 

 You pushed away from your door and down the hallway. Popping your head around the corner, you saw the brothers in various positions in the living room, eyes all glued to the TV and the race happening on-screen. 

 "I'm gonna shower." You announced, receiving grunts of affirmations as they were too focused to fully acknowledge you. Smiling at their antics, you headed into the bathroom, shutting the door and starting the shower up. Once the water was at the perfect temperature, you stripped and jumped in. Of course, once the mixture of hot water and steam helped you relax, you started singing to yourself, letting the worries of the day fade away for just a moment as the words flowed from your lips and echoed off the shower stall walls like your own little stage. 

 Unbeknownst to you, as soon as the bathroom door shut and the sound of water running could be heard, the volume on the TV was muted. 

 Ivar, surprisingly, was the first one to overhear your singing. He had come over to crash for a few hours after his latest doctor appointment and to work on an assignment for a University class. The bathroom door somehow had not fully latched when you closed it, cracking open while you were in the shower….and you started singing. Ivar sat stunned on the couch at the voice slipping out of the bathroom like a siren's song. He remained there, transfixed as you sang some song he had never heard but he could feel in his chest. Once you stopped singing and the shower turned off, he quickly jumped up and hobbled over to silently shut the door, slightly embarrassed by the idea of you catching him listening in to your shower singing. 

 Later that day after you headed out to work, Ivar asked Ubbe and Hvitserk if they had heard you sing yet. Both of them denied ever hearing you sing. When asked if he knew anything, Sigurd was upset, having asked you on multiple nights to go to a karaoke bar with him and some friends. You always refused by saying you sounded Iike a beached whale. 

 Ubbe was next to overhear. He was walking by the bathroom on the way to the kitchen when he heard your voice drifting from underneath the bathroom door. Feeling like a creeper but curiosity winning out, he pressed his ear to the bathroom door to listen better. To say he had been shocked was an understatement. Sure, he had heard Ivar praise your voice, but he figured his youngest brother was exaggerating. It made him wonder why you never sang in front of others. 

 A silent pact was made between the brothers that they would never share the information of your singing with anyone outside the four of them….and whenever you jumped in the shower, whoever was the closest would go and crack the bathroom door open so they could hear you better. 

 This time was no different. 

 Sigurd was closest, so after Ubbe paused the game, he jumped up and silently cracked open the door so your beautiful voice could flow out. The game picked back up but remained on mute so they could hear you. The first song you serenaded them with was Walk Me Home by Pink. Apparently, one of your new favorites since you sang it so often. Next was Someone Like You by Adele. By the third song, the brothers had abandoned the game and were solely focused on you and the raw emotion bleeding from your voice. This time you started to sing Someone You Loved by Lewis Capaldi.  

 Ubbe spoke up, keeping his voice quiet just in case you could hear them, however unlikely. "Has she said anything about her ex lately?"

 "Not to me." Hvitserk answered first. "I thought she was doing fine."

 "Just because she's not crying all the time doesn't mean she's fine." Ivar retorted harshly, never removing his eyes from the direction of the bathroom. After a moment, he got up and hobbled towards the bathroom. 

 "Ivar…. Ivar, what are you doing?" Ubbe hissed but was ignored. 

 As quiet as possible, Ivar walked into the bathroom and sat on the toilet lid; your singing managed to cover the sounds of his movement. As he rolled his head to the side, it was to find his brothers had followed him with varying expressions ranging from concern to amusement. 

 Normally you did not spend so long in the shower but today you decided to spoil yourself. You had been doing well all week but this morning you were scrolling through your Instagram and happened to stumble upon a picture of your ex with a new girl, smiling happily and kissing at a restaurant…. the day after you broke up. And seeing them together felt like it ripped a tear into the slowly healing pieces of your heart. 

 Instead of going out like you planned to do, you laid in bed all-day binge-watching movies and feeling like an idiot. So in the shower you took extra time pampering yourself, using a deep conditioner in your hair, shaving everywhere and just letting the hot water cascade down your skin and loosen the tense muscles. 

 At this point you were feeling a little better and decided it was best not to waste any more water. You turned the water off, running your hands down your body to get as much excess water off, before you reached for your towel. Grabbing the plush towel hanging on the rack, you quickly dried your hair and wrapped the towel around your body before pulling the curtain back….

 Only to shriek as you realized you were not alone in the bathroom. 

 "What? What are you guys doing?" You demanded, eyes frantically darting between the four brothers.

 Ivar sat on the toilet lid; head tilted as he watched you with a peculiar expression on his face. Hvitserk leaned against the sink, eyes darting from your towel-clad body to the floor then back up. Ubbe and Sigurd stood in the doorway, both looking the least comfortable but still not moving. 

 "We, ah, we were…. well, we are concerned for you." Ubbe said, rubbing the back of his neck. 

 "Concerned?" You asked incredulously. 

 Ivar ignored your question. "Is this about your ex? Want me to pay him a visit?"

 "What are you talking about?"

 "Your singing. They were sad songs." Sigurd answered, leaning against the doorframe with his arms crossed. 

 Heat flooded your face. You dropped your head, staring at the bathroom floor as you clutched the towel closer to your body. Honestly, the idea of them hearing your singing was far more humiliating than them seeing you naked at this point. "You…. you heard me…. singing?"

 "Y/n, are you OK? You know you can tell us anything." Hvitserk said, trying to meet your eye. 

 "Um, can…. can we talk about this when…. when I'm not naked?" 

 "Of course. Come on, brothers." Ubbe quickly agreed, tapping the door as if to signal. He and Sigurd walked away first. Only when you finally met Hvitserk's eye did he push off the sink and head out but not before giving you a flirty wink. 

 "Ivar…."

 He slouched back, folding his hands behind his head. "I'm quite comfortable here."

 "Oh gods, please, Ivar." You begged, almost on the verge of tears. 

 He stared at you a long moment before pushing himself to his feet. "Don't think you're getting out of this."

 "Ok."

 Appeased, he made his way out of the bathroom, closing the door behind him. 

 Once alone, you stepped out of the shower only to drop onto the toilet lid and place your head in your hands. Your chest heaved and your eyes stung as you fought back the tears that threatened to fall. Today was bad enough and now this. It had to be something out of a nightmare. Your own personal hell. 

 When you finally composed yourself, you quickly changed into your comfiest sweats and tank top. You wished you could make a run for your room, anything to avoid the impending conversation but you knew the brothers would follow, they were all stubborn and persistent when they wanted to be. 

 With a deep breath, you stepped out of the bathroom and towards the living room. What hushed disagreement the brothers were clearly having abruptly ended when they noticed you. Awkwardly you remained standing, unsure where to sit. The only open spots were on the couch between Hvitserk and Ivar or one of the recliners as Ubbe sat in the other one. Sigurd reclined on the rocker gaming chair on the floor. 

 Averting your eyes, you started towards the open recliner only to have a strong arm snake around your waist as you passed by and pulled you onto the couch. You squeaked as you suddenly found yourself perched on Ivar's lap. Somewhere you had certainly never been before. 

 "Where do you think you're going?" He asked, a cocky grin spread across his face. 

 "Um, over there." You nodded your head towards the other open spot. 

 "No, you're sitting here now."

 "Stop hogging her, brother." Hvitserk reached over and dragged you off Ivar. Somehow you ended up with your back against Hvitserk's side, his arm slung around you and your legs across Ivar's lap, him slowly running his hand up and down them. 

 Ubbe raised an eyebrow at the three of you. "Are you done yet?"

 "I thought we were just fine but I guess Hvitty had other plans." Ivar snarked, rolling his eyes. 

 "We're good now." Hvitserk said with a cheesy smile, making you giggle. 

 "So how are you really doing, y/n?" Ubbe asked, staring at you with those knowing blue eyes. 

 "Um, I'm alright. Today was just…. rough." At the four questioning looks, you quickly explained about what you found this morning on Instagram. 

 Ivar slapped the armrest of the couch. "I'm beating his ass now and nothing you say can stop me."

 You snagged his other hand that was still on your leg and clasped it, as if that alone could diminish his deadly intent. "Please don't. He's not worth it. I just…. I just want to move on. Ok?"

 He grumbled, but eventually gripped your hand and gave it a single squeeze in acknowledgement. 

 Now here was the part that petrified you; but you needed to know. 

 "Um, how…. how long have…. was this your first time?" Your words stumbled out, making you cringe at how ineloquent it was. 

 "What are you talking about?" Sigurd drawled; one foot propped up so he slowly rocked in the gaming chair.  

 You licked your lips, your mouth suddenly dry. You dropped your gaze, as you whispered your answer. "My….my singing."

 "What? You sound bloody brilliant! The others have heard you more than me but you always sound amazing!" Sigurd exclaimed, a beaming smile on his face. "I don't know why you haven't gone out with me before! Oh! I'd love for you to try and sing in my band, we could use an amazing vocalist like you! Gods, we could get way more gigs with a beautiful woman like you upfront singing."

 Soon as Sigurd started talking, you covered your face with your hands. The tears you managed to repress earlier flooded back. Your shoulders hunched over, cowering into yourself at the revelation. They had all heard you. Apparently more than just this one time. It was mortifying. Long ago you stopped singing in front of others, no longer able to face the ridicule, the degrading comments always thrown your way. And now, these brothers that you had become so close to…. if they said anything negative towards you right now, you were sure your heart would fully break and no lyric would ever pass your lips again. 

 Hvitserk shifted behind you, turning you so he could wrap both arms around your waist and place his cheek against the side of your head. "Y/n, talk to us." 

 You shook your head, the barely suppressed tears and poisoned words clogging your throat. 

 Abruptly, a pair of calloused hands grabbed yours, forcing them away from your face. You were immediately met by a pair of piercing blue eyes, only inches from your face. 

 "Whose ass am I killing now? Huh?" Ivar demanded in a low, menacing tone. Between his tone and the fury burning in his eyes, you knew he meant his question, and that sent a nervous chill down your spine. 

 "It's not…. it’s nothing."

 "Bullshit." Ivar spat. 

 Hvitserk nuzzled your temple, his voice lighter but still with an edge of steel in it. "I agree with Ivar. Something happened."

 Biting your bottom lip, you closed your eyes. There were a few things that were just too painful to talk about and this one, they had unknowingly stumbled upon. 

 "Was it your mother?"

 Your eyes flew open, your head snapped over to stare at Ubbe in shock. He met your gaze unflinchingly, and somehow you knew he already figured at least part of it out. He accidentally overheard a phone conversation between you and your mother one time and once you got off the phone, he immediately pulled you into a bone-crushing hug and promised you never had to see her again if you never wanted to, that they would take care of you. Of course, you cried all over him after he promised that. 

 Ubbe leaned forward in the recliner, placing his elbows on his knees, gaze still intent on you. "What did she do?"

 "She…. she hated when I sang. Said I was just desperate for attention. That I needed to just shut up. That no one would want to listen to me anyway. If she ever caught me singing…. once she duct-taped my mouth shut."

 You could hear the gasps at your confession, followed by a round of curses. Hvitserk pressed a kiss to your temple, tightening his hold on you. Ivar squeezed your hands, still holding them within his own. 

 Ubbe nodded as if not surprised. He ran a hand down his face and sighed before stealing your gaze once again. "I have a feeling she wasn't the only one to hurt you."

 At this point, a silent tear trekked down your cheek. You sniffled, dropping your gaze down. "I had an ex who used to make fun of my singing. He used to say 'at least you're pretty'. When we would ride together listening to music, he would tell me to stop singing and 'leave it to the professionals'. At some point, it just….it was better to not sing in front of anyone. So I only sang in the shower cause I thought no one would hear me."

 Hvitserk turned your head, looking into your eyes. "Baby, listen to me. Your singing is incredible. We all love listening to you sing. Please don't be embarrassed about this with us."

 "I'd love for you to walk around the house singing, I could happily listen to that all day." Ubbe said, a tender smile on his lips. 

 "I second that!" 

 "Sig, you're only here on Sundays." Ubbe glanced over at his brother. 

 Sigurd shrugged. "So? I could listen to her sing all day. Maybe she should move in with me and actually be appreciated."

 "No! You're not stealing her from us!" Hvitserk said, practically cradling you against him, like a puppy afraid to lose its favorite toy.

 "It's not stealing if she wants to go!" 

 Ivar butted in. "I am more interested in this other shitty ex and mother...can I find them?"

 "No, Ivar. You have to stop threatening people."

 "Why?" He whined at you, tugged on your hands, your legs still across his lap. "You won't let me teach them a lesson so all I can do is threaten."

 "Also sounds like you have terrible taste in guys. Anymore shitty exes we should know about?" Sigurd asked, rocking his chair. 

 You figured at this point you were spilling all your dirty secrets so what was one more. "Um, I was talking to this one guy but when he found out I moved in here, he called me a whore for moving in with two brothers and told me I was a waste of his time." You softly admitted, having made sure none of them ever heard about that after it happened. 

 For a moment there was dead silence then….

 "I'm going to need his name right now." Ubbe said, malice dripping off every word. 

 "Yeah! Let's cut his tongue out! See what he says about that!" Ivar cheered. 

 You could not stop the laughter that came out. The idea that these brothers got so worked up over anyone that ever insulted or hurt you was both sweet and slightly infuriating, but mostly sweet. No one had ever cared about you as strongly as these four brothers. 

 "It's fine now. How about this? Next guy to hurt me, I promise I'll give you his name."

 "No! I want to cut this asshole's tongue out. Maybe slap him with it after!" Ivar smiled with a pure predatory look. 

 "I think you should just date one of us." Sigurd shrugged, watching everyone with a smirk. "Then you know he'd treat you right."

 "I like this idea." Hvitserk smiled, squeezing you lightly. "We would romance the hell out of you."

 "You guys are being silly. I don't even know what romance would look like." You giggled at the absurd idea. All the brothers were gorgeous in their own ways and could pick up any girl they wanted, why would they want you? Besides, your relationships were just platonic. "Is the interrogation over now? Want me to leave so you can get back to your game?"

 "Nope, you're stuck here." Ivar said, leaning on you now so you were sandwiched between the two brothers. 

 Ubbe chuckled. "We've told you before, you are welcome to hang out with us. Why don't we put in a movie?"

 After many arguments and some mild threats, a movie was finally chosen. You settled against Hvitserk, facing the TV, as you played with Ivar's hair, his head now in your lap. 

 As you watched the movie, you missed the silent conversation between the brothers happening around you. It was decided that your next boyfriend would certainly be one of them and in the meantime, they were all going to romance the hell out of you and make sure you understood how important and incredible you are. 

 Starting with making sure you sang whenever you wanted. 

[cybernaght]

Lost Tomb Reboot aka Reunion: The Sound of Providence Season 2

I swear I wasn’t actually planning to write this thing, instead just opting for random picture spams of the season, starting with every time this show got Zhu Yilong’s Wu Xie wet, because that was a trend I had not expected and kind of lived for.

All that will still happen eventually, but here’s also my five cents on the season, because it is very very important for you to know just how worthy of love it is. 

You see, Season 1 was silly and fun, and definitely, undeniably, enjoyable. 

Then Season 2 swooped in, and completely won my heart. I cannot even express how much I adored it. Everything about this show is extremely extra in the best possible way; it is likely to have been the most charmingly over the top thing I have ever seen.

(Vague spoilers for : specific monsters, narratively significant moments, fate of the certain characters, including the protagonist.)

Some of it comes from the pace, which speeds up dramatically early in the season, and only slows down marginally to allow characters some breathing room. It’s not just gripping because it makes you want to hit play on the next episode, it also keeps you engaged because you can’t wait to see how the next wild set of events may be resolved and then topped. At about episode ten I was questioning how they could possibly produce a sense of further escalation. At episode twenty, I was wondering if anything can top dramatic impact of whatever was occurring only two thirds of the way through the season. 

I need not have worried: every single incredible character moment, every mind-boggling turn of the plot, every single bizarre threat would be blown out of water by the next one. 

Partly, this seemingly has to do with the writers attempts to ground the material. I am not sure what the novel contained, but I can discern that it was something along the lines of ghosts, ghouls and various supernatural circumstance. But when you are told  “this is a curse”, your reaction is naturally to go, “ah okay, so curses are a thing, and this is one of them, gotcha”. When you are told, “this is a heavy metal poisoning combined with a neurotoxin affecting the victim’s central nervous system and making them violently hallucinate”, your reaction is to question whether this is how metals, toxins, poisons, or, indeed, central nervous systems work in any version of reality. 

The show does this a lot. From human shaped swarms of killer moths, to flying brain-penetrating eels, to probably my favourite monster of the moment: the murder clams.

Seriously, I cannot stress enough that this show has murder clams. They move with their clam mussels. They jump with their clam shells. They will murder you in cold blood. 

There are ancient “laser corridor” style set-ups, there are shapes made out of fog recording its memory, there are group hallucinations generated by the sound of thunder, there are Mission Impossible style full face masks. There is a character who walked off a gun wound and sarin gas poisoning in order to die in the arms of his lover who looks like his dead sister. And by “looks like” I mean, “played by the same actress”. 

There is a whole character of Doctor Churros, who saves our hero from imminent death by washing his lungs with oil. 

This, I suppose, ultimately, is how The Lost Tomb Reboot (Season 2 in particular) lures you in. It turns what I saw as the show’s fault in season 1 into its biggest strength by establishing the world in which nothing is too outlandish and everything is possible. It so thoroughly breaks your expectations barometer, you grow to willingly accept whatever is thrown at you. 

The most beautiful thing about all of it, is that the fun and games and moments of barely controlled hysteria do not lower the stakes whatsoever. Moreover, somehow this show makes me believe that it could just about do something as irrevocable as, perhaps, killing off the protagonist 

You know how you can watch, say, a super hero film, and then the “all is lost” moment happens, and you kind of have to struggle to care because you know that they will pull through. It’s curious to see how that happens, but you don’t doubt for even second that it will. Well, when that moment arrived here, I found myself between ugly sobbing, and going into speculation overdrive to try and figure out how the Reboot would deal with that. By then I have seen that show be an high octave action movie, a supernatural mystery, a horror thriller, a buddy comedy and a spy flick: it was not a massive stretch to imagine it turning into a revenge tragedy.

Wu Xie dying had been building up since episode one, so you had hours and hours and oh-so-many hours to brace for it, and when the tragedy does not strike, the relief is visceral. 

Despite all the moments of hilarity (whether intended or otherwise), despite the chaotic turns of the plot, despite how utterly off the charts this show is tonally, when it matters, the narrative is pulled together in a way which not only makes complete sense within the world of the series, but is meticulously set-up, satisfying resolved, and delivers lovely emotional impact. Considering that the moral of the story is a very common “live in the moment”, paired up with “greed is bad”, it was surprising how much resonance its delivery actually created. 

Ultimately, however, this show is about found family, and, more specifically, about Wu Xie’s ability to create this family for himself and for every single member of it. He starts as one of the trio, and ends as one of a large group of old allies, new friends, and people he has graced with so much kindness that they follow him until the bitter end. 

Lost Tomb Reboot ensures that you get to know them all, and it’s pretty damn hard to not love this misfit group of adventurers in its entirety. 

(The only thing I could say is that I wish the series spent more time making sure the viewer knows and likes Zhang Qiling, but it seemingly had little purpose for him apart form sweeping in as an avenging angel every now and then. I get that he is a well established character in the series, and that his whole thing is being deadly and enigmatic, but considering that you got to know the other two legs of the famous Triangle so well, it’s a shame that this one was reserved to mostly being Xiao Ge Ex Machina. It would have been nice to know what he was about apart from “really damn cool”.)

Bai Haotian remained my favourite character. She is cute, sweet, romantic, and, for the lack of a better word, “girly”. She is not shy about her crush on Wu Xie, and is prepared to do a lot of reckless, dangerous things for him. None of the above undermine her intelligence, cunningness and authority. Xiao Bai is a young woman in a position of power, and she absolutely knows how to handle herself; for every time she is a damsel in distress, she gets to be the rescuer. For every time she puts herself in needless danger, she learns to collect herself and plan ahead. For every time she is bossed around, she turns and takes charge. Her journey is not the centred around getting the guy, but around discovering her self-assertion; she finds her place within his team not by being a romantic interest, but through her personal strengths. 

My absolutely favourite moment for her came when an antagonist used her affection for Wu Xie to get an upper hand on her, and she gets restrained, knife to her throat. Xiao Bai swivels away, knocks the attacker out and goes to town kicking him, to a great astonishment of this team, as she states that liking someone does not make her weak. 

And it doesn’t. Being in love has nothing to do with weakness or strength. Being a young, and excitable, and a woman does not equate to weakness either.

I’m not saying that this show is a feminist manifesto, because it is definitely not that. Every other prominent female character suffers a pitiful fate in service of creating motivation for the men of the story. But it does spend a lot of time making sure you, the viewer, know its heroes well enough to mentally befriend them. And if this means giving the female lead complexity, I cannot possibly be mad at that. 

So, this was it. This was the Lost Tomb Reboot. It brought me a ridiculous amount of joy and I will miss it a lot. 

And yes, the picture spams will be 100% an excuse to rewatch at least some of it. 

PS. Said spams miiiiight be gif based if I figure out a way to colour correct the damn things. 

[kinetic-elaboration]

March 9: Star Trek Movie Rankings

I spent waaaay too much time at work today thinking about Star Trek, the original series movies in particular, for which I blame B, so here’s a summary of my objectively correct ranking of ST I - ST VI.

1. The Search for Spock (III)

This film has it all: drama, love, humor, horror. It’s a story of found family banding together for a heist-plot to save their lost friend, and it ends with a beautiful reunion, and an appropriately emotional, slightly bittersweet, but still undeniably right conclusion for Kirk’s personal journey. Criminally underrated.

2. The Voyage Home (IV)

Undeniably the most fun to watch of the six, with an easily mocked but still honestly solid sci fi conceit at its base. I wholeheartedly love this film but I do think it’s a bit of an epilogue in terms of the overarching story of the movies, and in a way of the whole original series, so it comes a close second to ST III.

3. The Motion Picture (I)

The transition from TV to film was not smooth: this film is too long, has extremely questionable pacing, and features unintentionally funny costuming. But it also has probably the best sci fi concept of any of the films (even if it is slightly recycled from The Changeling) and really solid characterizations. Plus, This Simple Feeling.

4. The Wrath of Khan (II)

I’m just gonna say it: TWOK is overrated. The Genesis planet is a silly idea, Khan is a lame villain (at least by this point--I did like him in Space Seed), and Kirk’s characterization is spotty at best. It’s a smoother watch than TMP and definitely does have good moments, and it wins major points for the tear-jerking finale. But I don’t get why so many people consider it “the best.”

5. The Final Frontier (V)

I admit that in many ways, this is not a good film, and its most annoying quality is the way it utterly squanders a conceit that sounds really interesting on paper. The main story line is not an easy watch, nor a particularly fun one. However, the movie also has the best triumvirate characterization of, really, any of the films, and a solid 1/3 of its run time is just Kirk, Spock, and McCoy being silly, for which I give it major points.

6. The Undiscovered Country (VI)

Objectively, this is probably a better film than ST V. It has a solid plot and moves along at a good pace, and it’s a fitting final conclusion to the TOS story. However, I rank it last because my ST priorities are the characters, the science fiction, and the plot, in roughly that order, and this movie is not impressive on the first to fronts. It doesn’t do much with Kirk (other than having him complain about Klingons a lot and then sticking him in prison), it has basically no sci fi concept at all other than... the existence of aliens, and overall it feels more like a conclusion of this era of Federation history and a transition point for the larger Star Trek universe than a particularly important moment for these characters specifically. Yes, Spock is transitioning to diplomacy and Kirk is retiring, and this is a last little coda to their Starfleet lives. It’s nice enough. But overall the film does not have that je-ne-sais-quoi Star Trek feel, so I must put it at the end of the list. (Also... too many Klingons.)

[staticscreenwriting]

California Summer - B.H. Smut [one]

Synopsis: Kings Cove California is Billy Hargrove’s hometown. It’s also a popular summer vacation destination for rich couples and their spoiled kids. (Y/N) is one of those rich girls. Proper, sweet, innocent. Only that all bores her to death and Billy is just the adventure she’s been looking for. It’s all fun and games. A summer fling. Not strings attached. Right? 

Inspired by the songs “dreaming of you” and “Kiss it off me” by Cigarettes After Sex.

 A/N: This is smut, babes. Filthy. I will sit in the shame cube after I post it. Please if that is not fore you, don’t read it. Also do not interact if you’re under 18, that’s just not cool. Kay, thanks ♥

Might fuck around and make this a series.

[additional note: I am German. Sometimes I get the tense wrong or make mistakes. I am useless when it comes to punctuation. Go easy on me, please.]

There’s something about California summers, Billy thinks, thank makes them special. They’re hot and sticky and messy but they’re also exciting and exhilarating. The world seems to be dusted in a perpetual golden glow and days seem endless and full of possibility.

Maybe that sentiment is what brings all the tourists to the little coastal town of Kings Cove, California. A town caught between the undeniable charm of an old sleepy coastal town and the ever-expanding demand for tourist-friendly beach houses in gated communities where rich people can relish in the charm the town brings and then piss off once their vacation days are over.

Billy was born here, raised here until he was 17 and shipped off to forge his path in shitville Indiana. He was miserable then, but a shadow of himself. Angry and sad and overwhelmed by emotions he never learned to properly deal with. Singers and artists always seem to find something poetic about being young and angry and lost. Truth is: there’s nothing poetic about it, nothing romantic or desirable. It’s hard and it kills you slowly. Starting with your heart and then taking over every part of you, slowly but surely.

Soon as he turned 18 and was handed his High School diploma, Billy packed all his belongings into the Camaro and was off. The drive back to California, back home, it felt cleansing. Like a rebirth. A return to life at his own terms.

He got out. He survived. This, Billy is sure, he would always pride himself with no matter how trivial it may seem to anyone else. He got out. Not completely whole. Severely bruised. He got out with a heart so scared he’s sceptical it will ever fully heal. But he got out.

Though coming home didn’t come without its hardships and obstacles. There was nothing waiting for him here but a bunch of questions and an uncertain future. Finding a job, a place to stay, a point from which to start — it was hard. It still is hard. But he’s trying his best.

Kings Cove has a handful of restaurants, some convenience stores, a gym, a few bars, a drive-in, a normal cinema and a bowling alley. It’s really nothing spectacular and yet it seems there’s more and more tourist making it their temporary home in the months between May and September. It started about 5 years ago, that the town started changing with the increase in tourism. They bulldozed the playground Billy always played at, the one closest to the beach and built a bunch of fancy-ass houses and condos and a fucking Starbucks. It pains him to see it. To watch the town he loves so much, the one that holds so much charm, turn into a sandbox for rich people to shape and turn and make it something it isn’t. Something empty and lifeless.

The good thing about those tourists though, is that they are really really rich. Absolutely filthy rich. The kind of rich where they don’t know what to do with their money so you can charge them insane prices for ordinary things.

And that’s what the locals have started doing. A scoop of ice cream used to be 30ct, now it’s a dollar. You gotta bend with the world. You gotta adapt. Surviving means changing even if it sucks ass.

When he first arrived back, Billy had no idea how to navigate this place with all its changes. He felt so god damn out of place in his own home. That’s until he reconnected with Johnny, an old friend from middle school. A kid who grew up in a home filled with anger and sadness just as Billy did. Someone who understood. Someone who understands.

Johnny had it all figured out, adapted and changed. Got Billy a job at the maintenance business he works at. Fixing rain gutters and mowing lawns and cleaning driftwood off the sections of private beach belonging to the beach houses. It’s not the greatest job in the world but it’s alright and it pays good money and sometimes Billy even gets to hang out at the houses when the rich people are out taking surf lessons or doing a wine tasting a town over or try their luck on a god damn banana boat.

Kings Cove is small and the locals know each other. They’re a community tightly bonded through their shared disdain for the change their beloved town went through and the knowledge that though they can’t change anything, they can at least make the vacationers pay big money for everything.

It’s his second summer now and most of the families whose houses he tends to he’s already familiar with. You don’t forget the people who tip you 50 bucks each time. On Mondays, Billy cares for the Millers’ backyard. On Wednesday he makes sure the Callaghans’ pool is clean and still stinks of way too much chlorine. On Thursdays, it’s the Franklins’ estate that needs tending to. And weekends? Those are off.

Weekends mean he gets to enjoy the California summer himself. He goes out to the beach just after sunrise, to catch a few waves or just hang out in the ocean and let it wash away the stress resting on his shoulders from a whole week of hard work. Later, much later, when the sun is about to set, the real fun begins. There’s a bonfire almost every week. No one is ever quite sure who starts it and no official invitations are ever spoken though everyone knows and sure enough, every Saturday a crowd of young people gather by the driftwood pile and hang out and drink and dance as the bonfire crackles on.

It’s not just locals either. There’s always a few stray tourists there. Billy isn’t really all that interested in getting to know them. This is just a blip on their radar. A temporary adventure. But to him this place is home and he’s so fucking tired of these rich kids coming around and acting like they own the place. He’s the first to admit though, that the girls are quite hot and he doesn’t mind a little fling here and there without the fear of having them want anything permanent, knowing their time together comes with an expiry date. They can be quite fun and they’re so willing to let themselves fall into an intimate adventure with a local.

There’s no chase, no effort from him. The only annoying thing is they usually don’t grasp the idea of a summer fling and get clingy to the point where it becomes frustrating.

It’s a bonfire like any other, when his eyes drift across the beach, filled with people mingling all clutching a bottle or a cup. Nothing feels different or spectacular or special. But maybe that’s the thing about special moments — we don’t realise they’re special until we look at them in retrospect. And then they mean everything.

His eyes meet hers across the way. There are no fireworks. His heart beats at a normal rate. Whatever the movies and the songs try to sell you, that’s not how it really happens. Your world won’t shift and there will be no hummingbirds going wild in your stomach. It’s just a glance, a flicker. A moment that seems to hold no significance at all.

Billy can tell she’s not from here. Her outfit says it all. She’s wearing a long flowy skirt and a white tank top and some denim jacket over it that looks like it probably belongs to some boy with a trust fund and a name like Kyle or Charles. In her hair, there’s a clip with a fake flower on it. She looks expensive and fancy and like a piece of work that he’s not willing to put any effort in. He bets the guy beside her, the one that keeps playing with her hair. The one in the polo shirt. That’s probably her boy. His dad owns a boat for sure and probably fucks his secretary.

And even though he pulls his eyes away, he can feel his thoughts drift back towards her. As if some magnetic force tries to keep his mind there, with her. On the way she smiles, or how the wind blows through her hair and makes them looks messy and disorderly and — hot. On how he wants to be the one making a mess of her. He wonders what she feels like, tastes like, sounds like. Even Billy can’t deny he wants her. She’s just his type though something tells him she’s different from his other flings. There’s something deeper in her eyes. A secret he wants to unravel. It’s hidden there and it’s screaming out to him and only him.

As he turns back towards her, he sees her looks straight back at him. With those eyes full of secrets and that smirk on her lips.

Maybe his heart does beat a little faster then. Though he’ll never admit it.

That night he goes to bed and dreams of her and the beach and California.

California summers come with heat but they also come with thunderous storms. Mighty and unforgiving and rough.

Billy makes his way down the roads of Kings Cove, windshield wipers just about dealing with the heavy rainfall as it drums down onto his car window.

“ It’s the wrath of all women scorned and mistreated “ his mother used to say when he was younger and a storm washed over them. He always thought that was silly. Women aren’t thunderstorms, they’re April showers. They’re sunshine on your skin. They’re dewdrops on the lawn.

It’s so dull and gloomy he almost doesn’t see her. Only the peach coloured baseball cap makes her stand out against the grey. She’s slowly walking along the side of the road, unbothered by the downpour. Casual and relaxed as if she’s not getting soaked right this moment. There’s a Slurpee in her hand, blue raspberry.

He wants to drive past and no let himself be bothered with it. This, she, it’s not a mess he needs to get involved in. This can only end in a disaster. Rich boys don’t like you picking up their girlfriends. Rich boys also don’t like you lusting after their girlfriends. And rich boys who see you as a threat can get your ass fired real fucking quick.

And yet he pulls up to the curb and rolls down the window. “ Do you need a ride? “.

She smiles at him, the same way she did that night at the beach in the glow of the bonfire. Her lips are cherry red and for a second he wonders what they taste like. It’s like a primal desire, to taste her. To have her. God, he’s such a guy.

“ Need? No. I’d like one though.”

It’s the first time he hears her voice. It sounds so proper, so innocent. And yet there’s an edge to it. She’s all riddles and mysteries and things he wants to unpack and unravel. Something tells him all the red and the ribbons are only the outermost layer of who she really is. And wouldn’t he like to see more of her?!

“ Get in then,” he instructs with the nudge of his head. A gust of wind follows her as she opens the door and slides into the car. She smells of sunscreen and salt and artificial raspberry flavour. She smells like summer.

“ I’m Billy. “

“ I know. “

That catches him off guard. Sure he knows the locals and some of the kids whose parents he works for but that’s about it. He’s not nearly as prolific as he used to be in Hawkins. He’s a bit more mellow now if he can say so himself.

“ And you are?”

“ (Y/N). (Y/N) (Y/L/N). You tend to our beach house on Tuesdays. I saw you clean our pool the other day”.

That’s news to him. The fact that the (Y/L/N)s have a daughter. He thought it was only her parents alone in that big house in some attempt to rekindle the fire of their marriage. Last year it was only them two, he could swear.

“ Is that so? I could’ve sworn it was just your parents in that house. “

“ Was just them last year, I was in New York City last summer. This time they decided to bring me. Let me enjoy the California sun. “

“ So you enjoying it? “

“ Verdict is still out but I quite like the view yeah. “

The teasing edge in her voice does not get lost on him. If Billy Hargrove is good at one thing, it’s realising when a girl is flirting with him.

“ You watching me then? What does your little boyfriend think about that, huh?”

“ Boyfriend? “ she sounds almost offended at those words, spits it with a certain malice that takes Billy by surprise. “ You mean Dawson? “

Dawson. Of course, that’s his name. Fucking Dawson. Dawson with the swoopy hair and the polo shirt. Dawson with the trust fund. Dawson with the DUI and the state attorney dad. Dawson with the scholarship.

“ Dunno his name.”

“ He’s not my boyfriend. He’s a friend that’s a boy that thinks if he waves around his money I’ll spread my legs for him. As if I don’t have my own money. It’s so unsexy it makes my pussy dry as the Serengeti.”

Billy has to stop himself from pushing the brakes too hard. It’s not something he has expected her to say. Not this outright at least. Something about her brashness and her honesty is truly charming though. It’s endearing for sure.

“ Wearing his jacket though, poor guy thinks he’ll score soon enough.”

“ Eh. Maybe I’ll let him. I’m getting a bit bored. If nothing better comes along— “ she says it casually and shrugs her shoulders but Billy swears there’s an open end to that sentence. Almost like an invitation.

“ Hope pretty boy does it for you then. So — where to? “

She faces him, peach baseball cap on her head and cherry smile on her lips. “ See, the thing is that my parents aren’t home right now and I don’t have a key so … “

“ So...? “

“ Just wanna hang somewhere until they get home tonight. Maybe somewhere dry? “

Everything in him screams at him not to do it. Not to get tangled up in this. He knows, god he knows, this is a bad idea and yet he says it anyway.

“ Do you wanna chill at my place? “

She bites her lips then takes another sip from her Slurpee. “ Yeah, sounds good to me.”

God Billy, you are such a dumbass.

Billy’s apartment is small but he feels more at home here than he ever did in any house he shared with his father.

There’s an open kitchen/living room area, a bathroom and his bedroom. It’s not much but it’s his and that makes all the difference.

“ Well uh — this is my place. “

He almost expects to see some kind of disdain on her face, disappointment too maybe. She’s used to big fancy houses with white shutters and stucco ceilings. Though when he turns to look at her there’s none of it. Just curiosity. No judgment. Not even a tiny spark. Not even at all.

“ It’s nice. Do you uh — I’m soaked. Do you have a shirt or something you could give me?”

It’s now, that he lets his eyes travel down her body, and notices her shirt clinging to her body. She’s not wearing a bra and it’s painfully obvious and he swears he dies in that moment. There’s only so much a guy’s heart can take.

“ Uh. I — mmh.”

As if his body works on autopilot, Billy hurries towards his bedroom and rummages through his closet until he finds a shirt that’s even baggy on him and will surely work for her. God, seeing her in his clothes is gonna give him another little heart attack.

“ Here you g — “ she’s naked. Not completely but her shirt and jeans are gone and all she’s in is a pair of red underwear and no bra and some socks and that damn peach baseball hat.

“ Huh? you never seen a pair of tits before? “

“ No, I have. “

“ Good. “

“ Yeah. Here “

She smirks as Billy hands her the shirt, doesn’t break eye contact. Not even once and she slips if over her head and almost drowns in the fabric. It reaches down to mid-thigh and she looks glorious. Wet hair clinging to her skin, shirt covering everything but just barely. Bily is usually suave and charming and smooth. Why not now? Why not with her? What is it about this girl that she plays his games better than he does it himself.

“ You want something to eat? “

What the fuck, Billy. There’s a half-naked girl in your kitchen and you’re asking her if she wants food? What is going on?!

“ Sure, what’ve you got? “

“ Lemme see — “ Billy says and turns towards the kitchen cabinets and (Y/N) slides up and sits down on the island. Her ass must be flush on the counter and Billy has to stop himself from following that thought any further because that would result in a serious hard-on right now.

“ So I got some Nachos aaand — “ he says and squats down to open a lower cabinet, “ I think there’s guacamole somewh— “

A soft thump interrupts him and, as he realises what’s caused the sound, his heart drops straight down into his pants and his whole body goes hot. Like his entire system is going haywire.

His hand reaches out to take the flimsy red fabric into his hand. Her underwear. This has crossed flirting long ago. This is an obvious invitation and if this was any other girl or any other situation he’d already be balls deep inside her so why not now?

As Billy turns to look at her, the teasing smirk is back, her eyebrow is raised in a way that tells him she’s challenging his next move, and the secrets are back sparkling in her eyes.

“ Oops “ she says though he can tell she’s all but sorry.

“ What are you doing? You have a boyfriend. “

“ Uuuugh ”  (Y/N) moans in annoyance, “ I told you, he’s not my boyfriend. He’s just a boy who doesn’t get it. I have a lot of boys in a lot of cities who all do not get it. They think because they’re rich and their parents have influence, everyone has to do as they wish. They’re not used to not getting what they want and I like to see ‘em get pissy once they realise they can’t have me. Billy those guys — they are so boring. So dull and if I have to listen to one more lecture about politics or their scholarship or how their daddy helped finance the university’s library I am going to off myself. “

“ So what role do I play in this game? You’re just a rich girl who’s bored with her suitors then, huh? What am I ? “

“ Exciting. You are different. You are you, no ifs or buts. You are your own person not a clone of your wealthy father and his even wealthier father. You are exciting and so. fucking. hot. “

Billy doesn’t notice it happening but suddenly he’s so close he can feel her breath on his skin. She’ so close. So close. All he has to do is reach out and grab her. Touch her. Kiss her. Taste her.

“ Fuck me.”

“ You sure? “ he murmurs, voice low and deep and soothing. “That’s all this is gonna be. Sex and fun and nothing serious. “

“ Just fun. No strings. I’ll leave at the end of the summer anyway. Until then we can — explore. “

“ Explore? “

“ Mmh. There’s so much we can do.“

“ Sounds good to me. “

Billy doesn’t give her time to reply before his lips descend on hers. She doesn’t taste like cherries or chapstick or sugar. She tastes cold and like fake raspberry slushy. Billy thinks it’s his favourite flavour now.

His hands wander up and down her sides and hers get tangled in his curls, combing through his hair and tugging slightly. She’s breathing deep, quick breaths as his lips make their way across her neck and down towards her boobs. He bunches the shirt up and pulls it over her head leaving her naked on his kitchen counter. She’s absolutely fucking breathtaking and his jeans are getting awfully tight around the front.

“ You’re so hot “ he murmurs against her skin as he buries his head in the crook of her neck. Her skin is flushed and there’s a cute red tint to her cheeks. Maybe he was wrong about it on all accounts. Maybe she’s not as innocent as he has first thought.

Her fingers slip down his body and straight into the front of his jeans, grabbing his dick and squeezing his hard on softly. Yeah, she’s definitely not as innocent as he had first thought.

It’s a clash of teeth and a tongues and a lot of saliva. This is messy and raw and rough and he feels like he’s died and gone straight to heaven. With every second, his lips wander a little further down her hot skin, placing kisses one every inch he can reach until he’s kneeling in front of her. Her eyes lock on his as she spreads her legs further letting him see just what he’s been lusting after since the first moment he’s laid eyes on her. He feels like a man starving being presented with an all you can eat buffet.

Their eyes lock as his lips kiss the spot where her abdomen meet her thighs. It’s not where she wants him but it’s enough to make her go fuzzy in the head.

“ I’ll make you forget about all those rich fuckboys, baby.”

And he does. God, he does. As soon as he licks at her clit she can’t recall a single name of any other boy she’s ever met. He devours her like he was born to do nothing but eat a girl out. There’s kisses followed by kitten licks followed by more kisses. It’s driving her crazy, the way he flicks his tongue.

(Y/N) lifts her leg to rest on his shoulder as her hand reaches down burying herself in his hair. The way she tugs, the slight pangs of pain, it’s delicious. Billy can’t get enough of it. He adds a finger, then two, slowly in and out, the faster, then even faster. He knows she’s close by the way she throws her head back, bites her lips. Her lipstick is everywhere, her hair clings to her skin now from sweat instead of rain. She’s a mess and he’s so proud of getting her to this point. He further spreads her lips, lapping up the wetness, sucking at her clit, making her come undone right there on his kitchen counter.

The moans that fall off of her lips are almost pornographic, he wonders if her parents know the kind of activities she gets up to when they’re away. He bets they don’t. She’s a princess at home. Nice and proper. A princess who spends her free time getting fucked by their poolboy.

Billy pulls away at the last minute which (Y/N) really doesn’t enjoy. She pouts at him, gives him a sound of pure dismay. “ Why did you stop? “ she questions, voice breathy, almost incoherent.

“ Cause I wanna feel you cum when I fuck you. “

He’s not usually this bold and brash. Girls like lovely words. They like soft voices and hushed whispers and for boys to say nice things during sex. Not her. She wants the dirt and the mess and the honesty.

(Y/N)’s hand finds its way back to his crotch, pulling down the zipper of his jeans and freeing his solid boner.

“ No boxers? “ there’s a glimmer of mischief playing in her eyes.

“ You complaining? “

“ Fuck no. I’d suck you off but I want you inside me — like right now. “

Billy only nods, before fumbling a condom from his wallet and pulling it down his cock. He shares her sentiment. All he wants to be right now, is inside her.

Rough hands grab her hips and turn her around before pushing her down. Her boobs as flush against the counter, ass on full display. She’s a sight for sore eyes. A masterpiece.

Billy can’t keep his hands off her ass. He has to grab a handful, squeeze it, caress it. There’s boob guys and butt guys and then there are guys like Billy who know that both those features are mutually phenomenal and to limit yourself by choosing one or the other is a move only a fool would make and he ain’t no fool.

Billy lines himself up at her slit. He can’t wait to feel her around him, wet and warm and throbbing and —

“ What are you waiting for? “ she grunts, impatience clear in her voice and she tries to wiggle her ass closer to him.

“ Patience, baby.” Billy instructs as he grabs onto her hips and pulls her even closer. Her skin is so soft, so perfect. There’s a primal desire in leaving his marks of passion there so he leans over and places little love bites on her shoulder. They’ll be easy for her to cover up with a shirt but he’ll know they are there and that’s all that matters to him.

Slowly, painfully slowly, he trails his erection up and down her entrance, coating it in her arousal. He’s really not looking forward to clean this mess later on but right now it’s damn worth it by the way she’s trembling and wiggling underneath him, desperate for some stimulation.

“ Patience is not a word I know, sorry “ she’s so god damn desperate it almost makes him cum before he even gets a fuck in.

“ Yeah me neither. “

With those words he sinks into her and it feels heavenly. Engulfed by her warmth, her wetness, her passion. Quite frankly, he’s convinced, there’s no better place to be in the entire world, than buried in the pussy of a pretty girl.

Billy moves his hips slowly, deliberately, set a rhythm and a pace. He watches his cock disappear inside of her then slide back out in a delicious cadency as he dings his fingers into her hips, surely leaving bruises.

The moans tumbling from her lips are almost pornographic though he can tell they’re real and honest. There’s no reason for her to fake anything. He’s pretty sure she’d set him straight if he was doing something wrong.

“ more. “ she gasps, breath hitching as she pushes back against him, taking him even deeper. This girl is a dream if he’s ever seen one.

Billy speeds up his movements, slamming into her at a faster pace, pounding her against the counter. The air is hot and both of them are so sweaty and the room smells of sex and salty ocean air. God, he loves California summers and pretty girls.

There’s a fire lit in his lower abdomen as she whimpers and arches her back off of the counter. Billy lifts one hand off of her hips and grabs onto her front, caressing her soft tits and pulling her upright so her back is flush against his chest. The sheen of sweat covering them makes it hard to figure out where one of them ends and the other begins. Right then, they are one. Her peach colored baseball cap falls off of her head and onto the floor, where the rest of their clothes lie discarded.

His hand desperately moves across her chest, squeezing and teasing and trailing fingers around her nipples, hard from arousal.

“ Oh fuck yes. “

The confirmation that he’s doing something right, that he’s making her feel good, makes Billy’s ego grow 3 sizes. He’s such a sucker for validation.

He snaps his hips faster, harder, tries to go deeper. His hand grabs onto her thigh and lifts it up so her knee is resting on the counter letting him fuck her at a whole new angle.

At the way she cries out in ecstasy he knows he’S doing something extremely right. “God, right there. “ she almost sobs. Billy’s sure she’s biting her lip so hard it must be close to drawing blood.

Billy buries his head in her messy hair, softly traces kisses and love bites up and down her neck, tugs on her earlobe with his teeth. “ Yeah? Your pussy is a dream, baby. A fucking dream.” he grunts, voice laced with lust.

“ I’m gonna cum, Billy. “

He can tell, by the way she trembles, clenches around him. By the way her breathing hitches. And he’s right there with her.

There’s a fire pulsing through him, shockwaves rippling. It bubbles in his abdomen then boils over. With every snap of his hips the movements get more arrhythmic, messy, uncoordinated, desperate

A bunch of expletives fall from her lips but Billy can hardly make them out as his own orgasm washes over him. It feels like time slows and every sound disappeared into a white static. Nothing matters then but to chase that high and catch it and get some sweet release.

Billy feels her cum around him, squeezing him tightly in the process. The way she moans his name, as if it’s both a secret and a confession to himself and the world, that’s what does it for him.

Grabbing her hips with both hands, he holds her in place, before pounding into her with a few last uncoordinated hard thrusts. And then his vision goes black for a moment and his brain stops functioning as he cums into the condom.

For a moment there’s no sound but them trying to catch their breath as they slump down against the counter, spent from the activities. Sweaty, filthy, messy. But oh so satisfied and content.

Billy pulls out of her and for a second he misses her warm and tight around him. Like he was meant to stay there forever. Fuck, he’s such a guy.

Another heartbeat passes and (Y/N) lets out a melodic but breathless giggle. “ I could go for some Nachos and Guac right now. “

This girl is really something else.

They devour the snacks while lazing on his couch. Naked as they came to this earth, unbothered. Maybe this is what makes him go so absolutely feral about her, the fact that she’s so uncomplicated. Yeah she comes with all kinds of warning signs and bad news for him but being with her like this it’s so easy. Like they’ve been some kinds of friends for a long time.

Their bodies are always touching in one way or another. As if they can’t get enough. Billy’s sitting on the couch, feet resting on the coffee table while her legs are places on his lap, cigarette dangling from her fingers. The air is sticky and humid and even the late afternoon breeze doesn’t bring any cooling-off.

As his eyes fall onto the clock on the wall, Billy lets out a frustrated grunt. “ Fuck.”

“ What’s the matter?”

“ I’m supposed to meet my friend Johnny at the gym in about 10 minutes. Totally forgot about it. “

“ Do you have to go? “

“ I really should. “

“ You’ve had quite the workout today though. “

Billy scoffs a laugh at her words before plucking the cigarette from her fingers and taking a drag. He lets the smoke sit in his chest for a moment, hoping to capture even a bit of the warmth he felt when buried balls deep inside her cunt.

It doesn’t work.

“ He’s waiting for me. “

“ Aw, that’s too bad. “ she says grabs the cigarette back and, after one last drag, then stubs it out in the ashtray resting on the coffee table. “ I was just about to ask for a round two. Guess I’ll have to do it by myself then. That’s fine. “

Her fingers trail down her body, teasing her nipples before descending towards her slit. She slowly circles her clit. Billy is honesty sure she’ll be the death of him. This girl is so sweet yet so dirty and he’s not sure he’s ever met someone like her.

“ You gonna sit there and finger yourself on my couch ? “

“ You gonna sit there and watch and not join in? Come on Billy, I can give you quite the workout. No gym necessary. Do I have to beg? “

Yes. God he wants to hear her beg but that makes him feel a bit — uneasy. He doesn’t want her to think he doesn’t want this just as much as she does. Maybe they can leave the begging for another day.

“ You’re insatiable, huh? “ he asks as he settles himself on top of her, lips colliding with hers ina fiery kiss.

(Y/N) just nods, a satisfied moan slipping from her lips as his fingers nudge her hand away and replace them softly trailing up and down her slit, slipping inside every once in a while.

“ What can I say? It’s a bad habit I just can’t seem to quit.”

Maybe this is a really bad idea. Maybe he’s getting himself into more trouble than he needs right now. But the way she feels and sounds and taste make it worth it.

As the sun sets upon the horizon and the summer storm has long passed on to another coastal town, Billy thinks that it’s so worth it if only he can feel like this for the rest of the summer.

There’s really nothing quite like a California summer and a pretty girl with a dirty mind.

[youreacowgirllikeme]

Friday: Sparks

note: wrapping it up today with part five of ‘A week with Chris’. This was so much fun, thanks to everyone who followed along :) enjoy the fluff

(you can find the other parts here)

words: 1.6 k (this is definitely not drabble-sized anymore but I couldn’t help myself)

warnings: swearing

(Thursday, 7:11 pm)

Hey there, here are the pictures I took today, I figured you’d want them. CC

(attached: 23 images)

(Thursday, 7:13)

I almost forgot, meet me at 47-01 111th Street (that’s in Queens) tomorrow at 11 am. CC

(Thursday, 7:38)

By the way, I had a wonderful time today. Have a good night, Y/N. Chris

+++

(Friday)

On the subway ride to Queens, you re-read the messages Chris had sent you last night. The fact that he wrote you another one just to tell you that he enjoyed spending time with you made you immensely happy, and you could see the reflection of your silly grin in the subway window.

You were nervous about today, even more so than the times before. You felt like something had shifted between the two of you in the park yesterday, and you weren’t sure in which direction you were moving with Chris. There was an undeniable spark between the two of you, but he was still very much your boss.

The speaker announced the arrival at your destination, and with a sight, you got up from your seat. You would just roll with it, you thought, and deal with things as they developed.

+++

Like the days before, Chris was already there and waiting for you.

“Morning.” You greeted him. “No coffee today?”

“It’s already 11, I assumed by now you’d be awake enough to tackle today without caffeine.” He replied with a smirk.

“That totally depends on your plans. Spill, what are we doing today?”

“This is my favorite place in the whole city.” Chris said. “The New York City Science Hall, it’s something like an interactive museum, they have exhibitions rooms and a cinema, it’s great.”

“Sounds fun, I’m in.”

+++

“Chris, why are there so many children in here?”

You looked around the entrance hall of the museum with a puzzled look on your face, surrounded by what looked like an entire elementary school, all babbling and laughing. They were creating such an immense amount of background noise that you had to raise your voice to talk to Chris.

“Oh, a lot of the stuff here is intended for children, to teach them about science.” He replied with a grin “But it’s fun for everyone. Lighten up a bit, Y/N.”

“But why exactly is this your favorite spot in town?” you asked, eying the noisy kids around you warily.

Chris face got serious.

“My father used to take me here when I was a child. I grew up in the neighborhood down the street, and some of my best memories are from here, especially with him.”

You felt a pang of guilt in your chest at hearing how quiet Chris voice had become.

Of course you were aware about his father and how much he meant to him, and now you felt like a fool for talking about the place with that kind of disregard. Pulling yourself together, you gave Chris your most convincing smile and linked his arm with yours.

“Let’s make some new memories then. Come on, old man, I want to learn something.”

+++

“Ouch, god damnit.” you cursed, holding your hand in pain. You were trying to light a fire the stone-age way in one of the interactive exhibit rooms, and a spark had burnt your finger.

“Excuse me, ma’am, could you watch your language, there are children present.” one of the guards called your way, and you got beet red when a lot of small heads turned to you.

Chris snickered beside you. “Yes, Y/N, watch your mouth around the kids.” He whispered.

“Shut up, Cuomo. There shouldn’t even be kids here, this is super dangerous. Also I wouldn’t joke if I were you. You look ridiculous.” He really did, his massive frame was crouched in front of small the fireplace, looking even larger between all the children, and there were smashes of ash all over his shirt.

“You’re only jealous that my fire is already burning.” He grinned. You only flipped him the bird in return.

+++

Despite your earlier skepticism, you were having a great time. After several futile attempts of lighting a fire, you dragged Chris to see movie about space in the museums 3D cinema. You sat close enough for your knees to touch occasionally, and at some point, you were deliberately brushing your leg against his, smiling to yourself when he didn’t move away.

At first, you had been embarrassed about revealing your childish, overly excited side to Chris, but he showed zero judgement, acting silly and goofing around with you in a way you never thought was possible for such a serious person. The hours flew by while you were doing every activity the museum had to offer, and it was already late afternoon by the time you made your way towards the exit.

“Look, Chris, they have a photo booth.”

“Dear God, not again.” Chris groaned beside you, but you had already grabbed his sleeve and dragged him towards the box, basically pushing him inside.

“This won’t work.” You complained. “Its way to narrow in here, and you are too big.”

“Easy.” Chris grinned, sitting down on the small bench and pulled you to sit on his knee. Your mind was going into overdrive at being so close to him, and when he said “Smile!” and the flash announced the first picture being taken, you were still looking slightly bewildered.

“Quick, pose!” Chris whispered, and you just stuck out your tongue at the camera.

Suddenly, a huge arm got wrapped around you, pulling you close to the body beside you. You and Chris were basically cheek to cheek now, and you could feel your face burning up.

A sudden surge of boldness went through you, and you turned your head, pressing your lips to Chris cheek just as the last picture was taken.

Instantly, you became embarrassed, why had you done this? You bolted out of the booth, muttering “I need to use the toilet, be right back.”

In the restroom, you splashed cold water on your face until the flush disappeared, then braced yourself to face Chris again. He was standing next to the booth, holding the pictures you had just taken.

“We look cute.” He grinned, and you felt incredibly relieved about the lack of awkwardness. Appaerently, he didn’t mind the peck on the cheek.

“We really do.” You replied, and your heart sped up as he gave you a brilliant smile.

“So, to round up your perfect Cuomo week, I have another surprise planed. My car is just around the corner, let’s go.”

+++

Chris drove you back to Manhattan and parked his car in the garage of a huge apartment building on the Upper West Side. Your mind was reeling, was he taking you to his place?

You were too nervous to ask, riding the elevator with Chris in silence. You went all the way up, almost to the top floor.

“This one’s mine.” Chris announced as you stopped in front of a door at the end of the hallway.

You entered the apartment, and your jaw almost hit the floor.

“This is where you live?”

It was gorgeous, a huge, open space, illuminated by the golden light of the setting sun. The floorlenght windows offered an amazing view of the Manhattan skyline.

“Wow, I’m definitely jealous.” You joked, still a bit overwhelmed by the place.

“Uhm, if you’d like to, the terrace is a pretty good place to watch the sunset.” Chris said, rubbing his neck almost as if he was nervous.

“I love sunsets.” You said, following Chris to the glass door that led to the outdoor space. He was right, the view was amazing, beams of orange light reflected by the countless glass facades around you.

Chris cleared his throat next to you, and you teared your eyes away from the sky to look at him.

“This week has been great, Y/N, I’m really glad you agreed to doing all this stuff with me, and I really hope you enjoyed it as much as I did .” His voice was oddly emotional, his eyes never leaving yours.

“I had the best time, Chris, and I can’t thank you enough for all the effort and time you put into everything. I loved every moment.” you replied, returning his look with a soft smile.

Slowly, his hand reached out, brushing against your arm before cupping your cheek. You held your breath, unable to move a muscle, your heart beating incredibly fast.

Like in slow motion, he lowered his head, his face coming closer and closer until his lips finally settled onto yours. It was a feather light touch, almost shy in a way you hadn’t expected from your usually brusque boss.

You returned the kiss, softly moving your lips against his, you hand reaching out to intertwine your fingers with his.

“This was so fucking cheesy.” You whispered after breaking the kiss, trying to calm your racing pulse a bit.

“Yeah, but it worked, didn’t it?” Chris replied with a small chuckle.

“I wanted to do this since Tuesday.” He continued, voice more serious now.

“That’s funny, me too.” you responded, still sounding slightly breathy. Your heart was almost jumping out of your chest, was this really happening?

“We should do it again then.” Chris murmured, leaning down to capture your lips once more.

The sun had disappeared behind the horizon, the chilly air making you shiver.

“You’re cold.” Chris noted, wrapping his arm around you. “Let’s get you inside. I’m making dinner.”

You snuggled up to him, thinking that maybe you should write a thank-you note to the CNN bosses for giving you the week off.

The end (I think)

[the19thduckpotato]

In the Shadow of a Smile (Part 6)

Part 5

Izuku started to feel full and sleepy, suppressing a yawn and blinking away the sleepy tears resulting from it.

"Mmm?"  Toshi dabbed at his mouth with the fancy cloth napkin.  "Tired?"

"Mm, a little...." Izuku pillowed his squishy cheek on his hand, eyes drooping a bit. "S'cause I ate, I guess. I'll wake up later."

Toshi tucked some bills under his own plate, waved to Ryori, then held a hand out for Izuku.  "C'mon, then.  Can't have you falling asleep in public."

Izu gave a slightly-dopey grin, taking Toshi's hand and following. "I wouldnnnn't!" Urgh, I hope he walks slow. I'm full.

Toshi guided his charge outside.  "Oh really?" he asked teasingly.

"Noooo!" Izu grinned bigger and shook his head.

And though he didn't mean to, Toshi found he had led them back to the riverfront. "It's ok, really.  We can call it a day.  It's been exciting enough already, heh."

Sounds nice, to be honest. "But don't you wanna go anywhere else?" He muffled a yawn into the sleeve of his new jacket, then smiled as he was once again reminded of its existence.

"Nah, kid.  Your company has been greatly appreciated--" ever since Mirai His heart twisted painfully and he forcefully shoved the thought away.  "--but I don't want to drag you all over the place.  Let's get you home."

"Bu' whaddabou' you?" Izu rubbed at his eyes with one hand, the other still happily nestled into Toshi's big warm one.

Big hand squeezed small one.  "Hmm?"

Small one squeezed back. "D'you wanna go home or not."

I just like being around you.  You're good for this tired soul. But I also shouldn't be selfish... "You're the one blinking back sleep, heh."

And tired and I really wanna go home and sleep and-- NO, you gotta listen to him, he's not answering you! That means-- "But I won't be soon enough... n you didn't answer me, y'know." He squinted up at Toshi slightly suspiciously.

"Pretty sure I did," he replied with a wink and a crinkle eyed smile.  "There's plenty more shops to explore next time."  He gently tugged on Izuku's hand.

"Y'did not," Izuku objected as he went along with the tug.

"Shhh, you're delirious with tiredness."  A fatherly rumble of laughter.  "...want me to carry you?"  He rubbed the back of his head.  "I know you're kind of big for that...but...."

Izu blinked up at him. "--Ah... are you sure you want to?" I have to be too heavy for him-- and do I even want that? I'd be pretty embarrassed, I'd look silly-- but if I say no he'll never ask again!! That would be awful I DEFINITELY can't miss this chance but what if I am too heavy--

Another squeeze of hands.  "We'll keep going, then.  Don't worry, I'll catch ya if you drift off."

Did I miss my chance? Did he hear something in my voice and see it as a No? Did I push him away, or-- Izuku cut off his worried thoughts and leaned closer to Toshi.

"Really, though.  Don’t push yourself too hard.  I'll always be here to help, ok?"

Izu laughed softly. "I'm okay, really. ...Me too."

"You look good in that jacket." ....??? say it "You, uh... you look good in that jacket.  Kinda remind me of me as a kid."

Izuku’s face went from :o  to :D

Lookit that, another smile courtesy of Small Might.  See?  You don't always have to be super powerful to bring them happiness. Toshi made a noise of indeterminate emotion.

Izuku tilted his head, unsure how to respond. ...Is something wrong?

Toshi ruffled Izuku's hair.  "Home, then.  To the dorms, anyway.  It won't look weird if you suddenly noodle flop on me there.  ...less distance to carry you, too," he added impishly in a stage whisper.

Izuku grinned, ducking his head with a hissing sort of muffled laugh.

"Heehee, noodle flop.  That's...I gotta remember that one.  ....sounds like a plan?  I don't want to cut our visit short here if you don't want to."

“But I want what you want, you’re the one in charge here!” Izuku leaned against Toshi’s arm, flopping his head back dramatically as he tried to find out what Toshi really wanted behind his polite insistence that Izuku choose. “It’s your money anyway, heh.”

"Funny thing about being the Number One hero--no one ever lets me spend my money."  He shrugged with a shy smile.  "I wish they would, it's the right thing to do.  But I can't deny them the pleasure of wanting to do something for me.  ...that's why I like this idea of gifts.  Especially if we order online.  No one would know it was me."

Izuku’s eyes got wide, and his mouth formed into something between surprise and excitement. :> “Do you wanna wrap ‘em and give ‘em to the kids secretly? Because I can sneak some to their doors,” he bounced on his toes, thrilled that an old hobby of his was finally coming in handy again. “I’m pretty good at that!” He ducked his head again, realizing he sounded boastful. “Uhh, kinda, I mean.”

Toshi's jaw dropped, eyes wide.  "Why you sneaky little--"  Then he burst into an enormous grin.  "Excellent.  My protege and my accomplice." Not partner, though. He's too young for that. You know what I mean. ....... He pressed a knuckle to his mouth, trying not to take too obviously a deep and calming breath.  The grin burst forth again, still genuine but not quite as huge.

Izuku hid his own grin, a suppressed giggle that sounded undeniably like a zebra bubbling up.

Toshi's heart ached with relief.  He had almost slipped.  "Popcorn,"  he suddenly gasped.  "We have popcorn and you eat popcorn at movies and if you still feel sleepy, napping during a movie is generally accepted."

Izuku looked up with a gasp. “Yyyyyess!!” He bounced on his toes, all sleepiness hidden for the moment by excitement. “—wait wait, we can’t take that into a movie theater.”

"Well no, but I'm sure we could....hmmm.  We might need to bring more popcorn home if we watch in the common room."

“Hmm. True.” Izuku pulled at his lower lip in thought.

Toshi felt his resolve waver.  Somehow, going back to Madame Popol's and being social once more and then bringing home foodstuffs that would attract people which would mean being more social when all of a sudden, all he really wanted to do was curl up in his bed, pillow over his head-- Be strong. Don't drag everyone else down with you. "Good idea or best idea?" he said cheerfully.

“Huh?” Izuku blinked up at him, slightly lost.

"Bringing home popcorn for a big rousing movie night.  I guess we'd need to figure out what we want to watch, then.  Something that'd appeal to a lot of people.  Maybe even invite Mirio and--" His exuberant chatter cut off as he stared at the river, brows furrowed.  "--and uh..." Name, quick! Nighteye. NO.  Someone else!  The one kid, the...you know, with the--which class is she-- You mean Sir? Tyrande?  Tyra? You can't invite Mirio with out inviting Mirai, that's just rude. But i can't, he's.... Toshi was fast losing his train of thought.  Try as he might, he couldn't call up another name that wasn't Mirai.

"Oh, all of them?" Izuku's eyebrows wrinkled and he tilted his head, concerned about Toshi's trailing-off and apparent inner struggle for words. "I thought... it was too late?" A small pause. "...Are you okay?" he asked softly.

Everything hurt now.  His head pounded, his heart ached, his breath scraped at his throat.  His hand squeezed to dig his nails in, to slap himself out of it get ahold of yourself And felt the smaller hand still in his grasp. get ahold of yourself He turned to smile. hide it fake it till you make it don't ruin this don't steal his smile Mirai wanted smiles for everyone remember "...Are you okay?" the kid asked softly. Toshi froze.  The kindness in those words--he needed wanted it very badly.  He allowed himself to think about letting go, just for a moment, and felt his grasp on everything slipping. get ahold of yourself NOW His shoulders hitched, just once.

Izuku's eyes widened, and his other hand curled around Toshi's arm, holding on gently.

"...please no..." A hoarse plea.  Large hand squeezed small and Toshi tilted his head to the sky, refusing to let the tears fall.

"O-okay..." Izuku reluctantly removed his other hand, though the one holding Toshi's remained.

what are you afraid of? I'm afraid of losing him too, ok?! Idiot.  You absolute idiot.  What do you think you're doing right now? "Forgive me," the blond stammered out.  "I didn't mean to..." He felt a hot tear streak down and quickly covered his face with his free hand.  And under this cover, several more tears soon joined the first. not afraid of being seen? Toshi found himself too exhausted to worry about it any longer.

"It's okay," Izuku said softly. You can have boundaries, people are supposed to have those, I think.... The small hand squeezed the few fingers it could wrap around.

And there went your chance.  But at least you won't look weak in front of Toshi slowly sank to the ground, his free hand grasping the railing.  His flushed face shone with wetness. .....what are you doing. "--Izuku." Toshi broke Izuku's grasp so he could pull the boy into a hug.  He tried to speak but his throat worked and he knew forcing it would only bring a deluge of waterworks. I don't want to lose you, I'm sorry, I'm scared, I can't protect you any more, I couldn't bear it if something happened.  I just dont know how to speak my heart.  It's been so long, I'm out of practice.  Forgive your teacher, he's trying. He could only hold Izuku, trembling.

Izuku's heart skipped a beat as he watched Toshi sink to the ground, and again as Toshi broke his hand away. --??!? His arms wrapped around broad shoulders as best they could, holding tight. It's okay it's okay-- well it's clearly not okay but I'm gonna help as much as I can anyway-- what's wrong, what happened, did everything just catch up to him at once?? Should I ask or should I know already

"I'm so sorry, I'm messing everything up," Toshi whispered with a shaky laugh.  He buried his face in the familiar green hair. please let me keep him please don't let anything happen to him.  I'll try to do my best by him but PLEASE Then don't make the same mistakes.  Which means communicating. Toshi made a noise and continued to hold his kid.  but I'll say the wrong thing or something stupid or Or at least you'll be talking which is infinitely better. "...Izuku," Toshi murmured into the messy mossy mop.

"You're not," Izuku whispered back. "You're not." He hugged closer, lifting his head a big when he heard his name. "Yeah?"

"I promise I was just trying to make it a nice day for you.  And for me so I wouldn't think about things."  A sad sniffle.  "I may have used you as a distraction but I really did enjoy your company today.  Honest." And you're scared of it ending because you're afraid something might happen to him, you're scared of the thoughts coming, you're afraid of so much when All Might is never supposed to be afraid. "And I guess... I'm afraid..." With the truth so close now, the relief and the shame both vying so vehemently to take his heart, Toshi felt the tears well up thicker than ever.

"Of what?" One hand shifted, almost curling into wild blond hair.

Master.  Mirai.  Midoriya. "...I'm afraid of watching you slip from my fingers, too." Both arms wrapped around Izuku protectively as he gave voice to a sob, half terrified, half relieved.

"I'm here," Izuku whispered, tears starting to sting his eyes. I can't make promises for the future, I'm not that stupid, I know how things work. ...But now, right now.... "I'm here. And I'll fight to stay with you."

Toshi held him like he never wanted to let go as tears, now of grief for Mirai, now for want of Master, now for the ever looming fear of Izuku's safety, poured down faster and faster. And for the moment, his inner thoughts were silent as he simply let the hurts of his heart out.

Izuku held as tight as he possibly could, trying to sway comfortingly, heart pounding. Oh boy oh boy oh boy whatamidoing what if I do it wrong OH NO HELP-- No. No, I need to be there for him. Just... let him cry, that's all you'd want someone to do for you. After a while, his inner thoughts tried to drift to things like popcorn and whether there would still be time for a movie or if Toshi would even want to do that after this or would he be too tired or-- Am I being a bad listener? That seems impolite-- but then again if I thought too hard about this I'd try to say something and inevitably wreck it. Best just not to let him know I was thinking of anything else.

Exhaustion slowly crept in as the tears lessened.  And though Toshi tried to release Izuku, his hands shook and his heart pounded in fear once more-- a villain could show up right now and I wouldn't be able to do anything --so his bearhug lessened but did not break. I have to let him go at some point And the bearhug did not break.

A deep breath seemed to force itself into Izuku's lungs, an awakening sigh shaking his ribs. He blinked, shifting his arms, though not letting go. He skillfully suppressed a yawn, nestling closer so Toshi wouldn't mistake the sigh for wanting to leave.

The large hands finally dropped, the long lanky arms unwinding from Izuku.

A gentle questioning noise. Are you ready to get up?

Blue eyes flicked to the boy, nervous, waiting to see how Izuku would react.  They quickly looked away as Toshi pushed himself to his feet.

Izuku stood up too, purposefully ignoring the large wet spot soaked through his jacket shoulder. He kept looking up at Toshi, monitoring his reactions closely.

Toshi quickly wiped at his eyes and cleared his throat.  "I apologize.  I've....held on to that for a while.  Wasn't sure how to..."  He shrugged limply.

Izuku hugged the beanpole. "S'okay." He leaned his head onto Toshi. "...Thank you."

Toshi looked surprised, ears flushing.  "For...?"

"For like... trusting me with it," Izuku said quietly, fingers fidgeting with Toshi's coatsleeve. "I know that's. That's really not something you do with a lot of people," he laughed softly. "So uhm," he was back to murmuring. "...Thank you." He gave Toshi's middle a quick, grateful squeeze.

Toshi stiffened, the realization hitting powerfully now.  Then he relaxed, the warmest and kindest smile yet lighting his face up.  "Thank you.  For listening."

Izuku smiled back just as brightly. "Thanks for letting me."

Toshi rubbed his hands nervously.  "Are you....ah... disappointed?"

Izuku's eyebrows furrowed and he blinked in confusion. "At what?"

Toshi rubbed one arm sheepishly.  "For not being as strong as you thought I was."  Even saying it out loud sounded ridiculous as he said it.

Izuku's puzzled squint deepened, and his head tilted further as he spoke. "You... are? You're even stronger than I thought you were." I mean I always knew All Might must have problems, but GEE WHIZ.

Toshi looked at the river again, biting his lip.  Then he shrugged and gave Izuku a thumbs up.  "Well so are you."

Izuku took a second to think about that-- exactly how strong did you THINK I was, that must have been nil at the beginning --then smiled up at him. "Thanks!" Another brow-furrow. "Did... you still wanna do that movie thing?" But so many people.... "...Maybe... if it's okay... not in the common room..." he lit up with an idea. "I have a laptop we can use!"

Toshi nodded with polite agreement, looking like a top heavy sunflower starting to lean over.  "Maybe that's best."  He rubbed his aching eyes.  "I'm not feeling up to too many people at the moment."  A soft embarrassed laugh.

Izuku made a face. "Mblegh. Me neither." Than gave a sheepish laugh and scrunch. "If that's okaaay.... heeheeh."

Toshi reached a hand out.  "You ok?"

"Oh, yeah, just tired." Izu shrugged. "Never was one for long days." He blinked with some panic, realizing once again how what he said could be taken very badly. "I mean I LOVED this, I did!! I just meant I got tired sometimes and-- ohhhhh no that came out all wrong"

Toshi knelt down and gently took Izuku's shoulders.  "Hey hey hey, easy, kid."  His eyes shone happily.  "I get exactly what you mean.  ...I'm sure the last few minutes didn't help but, well...  it's been a long day for both of us.  And I'm feeling pretty run down myself now."

Izuku impulsively wrapped around Toshi's shoulders again, relief flooding his heart. "Okay," he said, muffled into Toshi's coat. "You ready to go home?"

The blond hugged the boy back, the warmth of the person he loved the most so close, so caring.  "Yeah," he replied thickly.  "You?"

Izuku gave a sigh that might as well have been a purr, so cozy was it. "Yeah." He smiles contentedly, his eyes crinkling shut with sudden happiness. "Me too."

"C'mon then."  Toshi began to lead Izuku away, then paused and gazed over the river one last time. Goodbye, Mirai.  I won't forget to smile.

FIN.

[smokedcapybara]

looks like my exhausted rambling isn’t over yet but this time I’m gonna talk about Tony Stark and why I hate the direction the MCU went (aside from Black Panther, Gaurdians of the Galaxy, and Ragnarok - but why they’re exceptions might also be touched on)

so, a long while ago I talked about how Young Justice and Teen Titans has been exactly what I needed when I first moved to Bellevue - I would imagine the heroes watching over me, making sure I was safe, or coming to whisk me away so I could join them and become a hero myself

I started watching the MCU movies around the end of middle school/beginning of high school and Iron Man, for me, couldn’t have come into my life at a better time

firstly, my first introduction to superhero movies was the Batman Beyond trilogy which was exactly the opposite of what I needed and almost enough to turn me off superhero movies entirely

and then I saw Iron Man, which was so completely different - it was funny and hopeful and bright - but also... well

around that time I’d constructed a mask to hide all my negative emotions - all my pain and anger and fear, everything caused by the abuse I’d suffered in Texas and my mom and brother starting to lash out more and more - and this mask, well to me it looked an awful lot like Tony Stark’s

and that was what I needed, I needed to see myself in him, to have the reassurance that I could move on from my past and become a better person, that I could have happiness, that no matter what others might think or see neither my mask and what was under it made me an irredeemable person

for the whole first half of the MCU I latched on to Tony, him and Loki were my favorite characters because they represented the two possibilities of what I could become - the positive and the negative, and even the negative didn’t look all that bad once you scaled it down to a small, disabled human from the powerful, magically talented god

(I also liked Loki because it was like they’d taken all my own family issues and lain them out in a way that anywhere I looked in the fandom I’d see people indirectly supporting me through their support of him)

I also liked Bruce, Clint, and Natasha, and all the side characters, they were all relatable in small human ways that I was very fond of

Thor and Steve I struggled with though

for about three years - the three years I lived in Texas - my mother was married to a bodybuilder name James, he was abusive and because of this I was traumatized and spent up until recently automatically scared of any large muscular man

sort of a ‘they have to prove they’re not to be scared of instead of the other way around’ kinda thing, and unfortunately Steve and Thor did not do that in those first few movies

so I projected heavily on Tony and tried not to let my trauma color my opinion of Steve and Thor too much and trusted that Marvel would handle their main characters as well as I was used to from things like, for example, Teen Titans or Young Justice

Age of Ultron was difficult but it had some good Clint moments and the ‘language!’ running joke was fun - I was torn up at the loss of Jarvis, of course

and then Civil War came out

they took the character I projected on and one of the characters my trauma made me somewhat distrustful of and pitted them against each other and somehow, miraculously, I sided with Steve

of course I sided more with healthy communication and talking things out amongst themselves before they take sides and start splitting up but unfortunately there wouldn’t have been much of a movie if they’d done that, would there?

and then

and then, Steve admitted to knowing who killed Tony’s parents and not telling him sooner and got upset at him for being upset

I’d managed to get past my trauma enough to recognize that he was mostly dedicated to being a good person, I’d even managed to get past it enough to side with him over Tony for the better part of that movie

but watching that fight, especially the end where Tony was laying there defenseless, was almost like being retraumatized - having the association of large muscular men as violent and dangerous rebranded into my brain - and the letter he sent at the end pulled up all the less physical aspects of James’s abuse

and so Steve was firmly associated in my head with all of that stuff from my past, and it made it so hard to participate in fandom where suddenly everyone was picking a side and declaring one or the other completely in the wrong

and those who like Steve or believed his side was right decided anyone who liked Tony, or disapproved of how Steve handled the whole situation with Tony’s parents having been murdered, was a terrible person and should be torn down for liking him, they reduced Tony to his mask and declared that he’d never be able to make up for his past - called him heartless and more

and those who supported Tony were just as bad

and there was no room for someone who supported Steve’s argument against the accords but was against his actions in the Hydra base(I don’t remember where it was, I watched the movie once and refused to ever watch it again cause it was too triggering for me)

and while the rift in the fandom has softened, its still there - everyone seems to either hate Tony or hate Steve

and those who dislike Tony have had more and more good reason to as the series has gone on and it hurts

because at some point he stopped being a beacon of hope for me while still being too connected to me

in fact, it’s almost like him and Loki switched places with Ragnarok and everything

(here’s where we touch on why Ragnarok is so much better than most of the rest of the MCU, and is in fact my #1 favorite MCU movie)

by the time Ragnarok came out I had lost my main fictional source of hope for myself - I’d only ever found two characters I related to in that way and on that level: Tony and Loki (there have been many other fictional characters I’ve related to but all either on much smaller scale or just in wildly different directions)

and Tony was quickly becoming worse than what Loki had represented for me, my hope turned sour, my mask indistinguishable from the truth, I was a little lost

I distanced myself somewhat from the MCU fandom, I just couldn’t handle it, it hurt too much

and then I watched Ragnarok

Thor was goofy and ridiculous and silly and a definite hero but in an almost washed up way - like his time had come and gone and come again and he was gonna grab it with both hands while it was there but not take it too seriously this time cause he knew better, y’know?

and that was exactly what I needed to get past the ‘big muscular man’ trigger to see him as a whole Good Person and absolutely love him

and him and Loki’s interactions were exactly what I needed right at the cusp of a change for the better in my relationship with my own brother

and by the end of the movie Loki was happy and accepted and understood (and gay, can’t forget the gay subtext) - while still being himself - and that was definitely what I needed

and then Infinity War and Endgame came out and I still haven’t watched either of them yet but I don’t need to and I don’t want to because I’ve had enough spoiled for me to know that nothing good would come of it

and it makes me so sad and angry

Marvel took this series, these characters, that was so important to me at such a difficult part of my life, that I was so dedicated to for so long, and essentially threw it all away, trashed it, ran it into the ground so thoroughly that I decided not to watch any more unless it’s, like, a Black Panther sequel - and that mostly because black superhero movies need to be supported so more will get made cause they’re important (and because Black Panther was good but, I mean, I feel like the rest of this post does a good job explaining that one movie being good doesn’t mean it’s sequel will be or that you should watch the sequel so the representation aspect makes more of a difference for me rn)

and all because... what?... cause they decided drama and conflict was more important than their main team being a team? cause they didn’t want any spoilers leaked so they lied to their actors? because they were more motivated by making money than telling a satisfying story? cause they forgot not all their watchers are cookie cutter carbon copies of each other and all relate to different aspects of different characters for different reasons?

because they forgot that because this series might be a child’s first introduction to the concept of superheroes they have a responsibility to protect and nurture that child’s faith in the world? that’s the responsibility you take upon yourself when working with those characters, any superhero characters unless your story is undeniably adult oriented, and you need to remember that

superheroes are supposed to be our hope that maybe things can be better, maybe we can make a difference, that’s what got Marvel and DC big and they need to do better to remember it

(I liked Black Panther because it was very emotionally impactful and visually stunning and had great characters and representation - so many different important woman characters as well as most the characters being black! - and just overall was, like, the ideal movie)

(I liked Guardians of the Galaxy 1&2 because it was easily separated from the rest of the MCU in my head and it was fun and funny and leaned very heavily into found family which is my jam and it had an A+ soundtrack and Groot was adorable and amazing and Drax was very autistic coded in a Good way, also Gamora and Nebula gave me similar sibling feels to Thor and Loki which is important to me)

[writingsofadream]

Chapter Five | It’s Getting Hotter 

Pairing : Jungkook x Reader 

Story : You knew being an intern at BigHit wouldn’t be easy, but you’d never imagined Jungkook would make it even harder.

You are a new intern at Big Hit, and you get to meet the boys. Set in the real world (as opposed to an AU), and just before the Love Yourself: Tear comeback. 2.1k words in this chapter. 

|||||||||| 5 ||||||||||

Sitting in the plush of her excessively fluffy carpet, you help Suwoo finish off the last screw of her damn Ikea table. Between the two of you, it had taken almost a whole hour. Snacking and laughing in between, it was no wonder you’d been able to finish it at all.

“I just can’t believe you heard him TALK. You breathed the same air as MY Jimin! That’s so crazy to me…” Suwoo shakes her head in disbelief as she says this, a little jealous but mainly just amazed. “You’re sure there’s no way you could sneak me in?” She cocks her head naughtily.

“Fuck no. I actually wanna keep this internship to its end. And it was hard enough for me to get in, let alone sneak a whole other person in.” Your smile is tightlipped as you think about what you’re risking tonight.

“Urgh, that is super no fun. Can you at least mention me to him? Her eyes are sparkling with ambition.

“I told you, I haven’t seen any of them since that first day. They’re very elusive.” Well, that wasn’t quite true. But you sure as hell couldn’t tell Suwoo otherwise. Suddenly, your phone gives a slight buzz from the newly constructed, slightly ugly Ikea table.

12:03pm What are you up to? Are you still coming tonight?

You pull your phone closer to you as Suwoo inspects some of the questionable screws, tightening them once more just in case.

12:04pm I’m helping my friend build an Ikea table. Well, we just finished. What are you doing? 

Pressing send, you then added another message as an afterthought.

12:04pm Yea, I think I’m still coming tonight. Not if you bug me about it though!

“Who are you messaging?” Suwoo’s question brings your head up from your phone, and you turn the screen off hastily.

“No one. Just my brother.” The lie is clumsy and rushed, but she seems to accept it anyway.

“Ohhhhh,” she replies as she nods her head knowingly. “How is he? Has he finally proposed to that dutiful girlfriend of his?”

You respond with a smile, since this is a long debated topic between you two. At 28, he should definitely be proposing sometime soon, especially since they’d been together for ten long years. And yet, for some reason that completely eluded you both, he just hadn’t popped the question yet.

“Not yet. But hopefully any day now. She’ll definitely be relieved when it happens!”

Ding. Your phone.

12:06pm Okay, okay. I’m in dance practice right now. I’d show you some moves, but they’re actually top secret kekekekeke

You considered replying, but the nagging voice at the back of your head told you not to. What if Jungkook’s messages were seen by someone else? One or two might be semi-explainable, but 50 or so? No way. The more you talked, the more dangerous it was. And besides, you were risking enough by agreeing to go and see him tonight. So no, you weren’t going to reply. At least, not yet.

You and Suwoo set the kitchen back up, now with the Ikea table taking centre stage. You both agreed that it wasn’t actually THAT bad, and it was good enough for the moment. You moved around around a few different pieces, including some pretty heavy pieces. Collapsing onto the couch, Suwoo pulled out a block of chocolate for you both to share and some lemonade. After scrolling through Netflix for a minute or so, your suggestion of the anime movie Your Name won, and the opening credits started up.

Cracking open her can of lemonade, Suwoo turns to you. “So, have you thought about going on that date yet or no?”

Suwoo has been trying desperately to have you go on a date with her little brother. He was also 19, and nice enough, but you really didn’t have any kind of spark. He seemed to feel the same way, but Suwoo was intent on having you both try out at least one date.

“No! I told you, we don’t match. He’s nice, but he’s nice as a friend and nothing more. Stop pushing it!” You say the last line loudly, giving her a joking death stare.

Grabbing the pillow next to her, Suwoo gives you a gentle thump with it. “Oh come on! You two would totally be cute together if you actually went somewhere and had fun! Just once, that’s all I’m asking!”

At your refusal, she simply thumps you again with her weaponised pillow, this time harder than the first. “You’re so annoying! Say yes, or I’ll keep thumping you!”

Realising your supposed best friend will cause you bruising if you continue your resistance, you decided the path of least resistance is probably for the best. Sighing, you give your resignation.

“Fine. We’ll go out to a club together.”

Her squeal is audible, and she happily jumps back now, pillow now sitting harmlessly back at her side. “Perfect. I knew you’d cave eventually!” A cheeky wink follows this, and she sips her lemonade victoriously.

Rolling your eyes, you feel yourself smile despite the arrangement. Suwoo was unlike anyone else you knew; she was funny and silly, and didn’t take anything seriously. Being around her was never boring, and no matter what the outcomes, you never felt hard done by any of her ‘evil genius’ plans.

The soft buzz of your phone from your lap takes your attention from your thoughts down to the screen, where the message stares back up at you.

1:10pm What do you want to eat tonight?

You typed out the words ‘just ramen will be good with me’, but then had more second thoughts. Fuck. You should spend as little time there as possible.

1:11pm I’ll eat before I come.

You sounded so mean. It wasn’t your intention, and guilt bubbles up in your stomach. Suppressing it, you remind yourself of all the reasons you couldn’t be yourself around him or when talking to him. For starters, the whole situation shouldn’t even be real. The familiar ‘fuck’ floats across your thought process, the word summarising your feelings about it all. What a potential mess. But god, he was so..everything.

The ding of your phone signifies his reply, and for some reason your heart tightens at the blunt, two letter response.

1:13pm Ok.

Was he upset? You started thinking of what you could possibly respond, wanting to make things better even though you shouldn’t. Suwoo’s slap to your leg jolts you back, pulling you out of your confusing emotions.

“Are you gonna watch this fucking thing or not? It was your choice babe, and I’m sure your brother can wait!” Her look is justifiably annoyed, so you instantly turn the screen off and slip the phone into your purse, where it can’t disturb you any further.

“Okay, I’m back.” You visibly roll your eyes at her again, and she mockingly does it back to you. The two of you explode with laughter, and after some more joking around you both settle back, snacking away and enjoying the rest of the movie.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

Finally, you arrived back at your apartment. Checking your watch after closing the door behind you, it showed you 4:13. You hadn’t realised you’d stayed so late, but at least the two of you had finished what you’d gone for and had a much-needed catch up. Pulling your phone out, you checked it for any waiting messages.

1:47pm I’ll buy some snacks in case you’re still hungry.

2:51pm If you’re ignoring me that’s pretty mean.

4:03pm Are you still coming? Let me know.

Fuck, you’d totally forgotten about replying. However, tonight’s plans had been constantly popping into your mind. Throughout the movie, every semi-romantic moment made you think of him, and during the train ride home going to Jungkook’s tonight had been all you’d thought about.

Your reply was short, but decidedly sweeter than the others.

4:15pm Yes, I’m still coming. Sorry for taking so long.

His reply was almost instantaneous, buzzing on your marble tabletop.

4:15pm Were you busy, Y/N?

You decided to reply honestly. It wouldn’t hurt to tell him about your day, surely.

4:16pm Yea, I was. We sat down and watched a movie, so I totally forgot to message you back. I only just got home, actually.

You waited for a few minutes, expecting to see typing bubbles pop up or a new message flash onto the screen. After nothing came up, you put the phone down somewhat reluctantly. You liked talking to Jungkook, as much as you didn’t want to admit it. There was undeniably something between you two, and you weren’t sure you liked it. It was…emotional, but also overly sensual. Sexual even. It was like two magnets being drawn to one another.

You plugged your phone into the kitchen charger, and headed for your bedroom. Jungkook had said you could take a taxi there at 5, since the boys were heading out early. You had agreed, since this meant you would most likely be able to leave earlier as opposed to later. Looking over your wardrobe, you found yourself reaching for a little black dress you owned, but rarely wore. It was tight, and showed off your cleavage. It’s thin straps and plunging neckline were attractive, and the length came to you mid-thigh. You were tempted, but shook yourself. What were you doing? This wasn’t a date.

You instead grabbed a light grey overall dress, which complimented your hips rather than your breasts. It looked much more acceptable, and you brushed out your hair to a shine before tugging on some white converse with light pink ankle socks, which frilled at the top. You looked cute, sure, but definitely not sexy. Which was a good think, you supposed. Heading back out to the kitchen, you checked your phone for the time, but the text caught your eye first.

4:30pm I just got home too, and I’m showering first. The boys are all leaving in 10, so you can definitely be here by 5. I’ve told the front desk to let you up, but you’ll have to show ID. And don’t worry Y/N, they’re really professional, no one will find out.

4:31pm I’m really looking forward to seeing you.

Your reply is too flirty for your own good, and you only regret it once it’s sent.

4:32pm Ditto.

()()()()()()()()()()()()()()

The taxi dropped you off out the front of Hannam the Hill, one of the most luxurious and expensive apartments in Seoul. In order to even get to the front of the reception, you’d already had to show ID to three different people. After thoroughly checking it and calling multiple different people, they’d finally let your taxi pass through. The whole time you’d been messaging Jungkook, but he hadn’t replied, which had made the whole ordeal harder and more stressful. You had no clue who they’d called or told, but you felt somewhat relieved to have even been let through.

Paying the taxi, they turned and sped back out. You headed into the reception building, which was modern and undeniably expensive. Living somewhere like this would be almost out of a dream, you thought as you approached the woman. You told her you were there for the boys’ apartment, mentioning it by number only. Asking for your ID, you willingly passed it across to her. Smiling, she nodded and buzzed you through, giving you an elevator key.

The elevator was gold and red, exuding money. In your plain dress you felt out of place, and after everything that had happened to get in you felt almost embarrassed. Checking your phone, it buzzed in your hand just as the screen lit up.

4:56pm Shit, I’m sorry! I was showering. Did you make it up okay? Is everything good? Where are you?

The elevator ping sounded, and the doors opened out to a small corridor leading to a front door. Taking a deep breath, you walked up and ran the bell.

The door opened within a few anxious seconds, and a wet-haired and shirtless Jungkook answered the door. A towel tied around his waist, his abs were within your reach, glistening and defined. His muscles are…unbelievable. Jerking your eyes up to his equally handsome face, his eyes are amused and his smile cocked to the side.

“Like what you see?” His voice is teasing, and hot blush spreads across your cheeks. Indignant, you snap back a reply.

“It’s okay, I guess. Are you going to let me in, or just stand there?” Smiling, he opens the door wider and you get a glimpse at the modern, expensive interior.

Fuck.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

AUTHOR’S NOTE: Hi! So, the next chapter is going to be...super smut! After this the story really picks up, don’t worry - I have big plans for it! If I’ve made any mistakes (like typos or anything) please message me so I can fix them! Thanks :) 

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Michael After Midnight: Avatar

Hyperbole is a real bitch. No matter what direction it goes in, it can seriously hamper a movie’s reputation. It’s the reason why I always just give a broad recommendation at the end of my reviews rather than a score; I find saying “Hey if you like this genre/subject matter/actor/etc, you might like this film” is a lot better than saying “This is a 10/10 five star masterpiece that all humans who ever shall exist need to see.” All too often the latter is what you get from mainstream publications when they praise a film.

Look what happened to Frozen; it was called one of the better Disney movies in recent memories and was praised to the heavens and back, which led to a bunch of people on the internet vocally disagreeing with said opinion, which then led to an entire anti-fandom of obnoxious basement dwellers who felt the need to constantly remind everyone Frozen sucked on any animation post they could find. All of this for a movie that, in hindsight, is just a solid, standard Disney princess flick.

Tonight we’re talking about a similar case, a film that when it came out was hyped up as a groundbreaking masterpiece of visual effects and a box office smash that grossed insane amounts of money… and was then derided as forgettable and a ripoff of Pocahontas or FernGully or what have you in the years to come. Yes, tonight we are talking about James Cameron’s smash hit, Avatar, and honestly? It’s probably the second best thing named Avatar out there, after Nickelodeon’s series about the last Airbender. After spending years being an obnoxious hipster douchebag and not watching it because it was popular followed by several more years of being an obnoxious douchebag who bashed whatever it was that was popular to bash, I finally sat down and watched James Cameron’s silly blue alien environmental movie… and frankly, it’s a pretty damn good movie. And I don’t just mean “oh it’s better than I expected but not great,” I mean “I can genuinely see to an extent where people were coming from when they were praising this.”

The story goes like this: In the far future, Earth is a polluted pile of fuck, so humans have taken to looking for resources elsewhere. One elsewhere? The moon of the planet Polyphemus, known as Pandora, which is home to a rare mineral that humans ironically dubbed “Unobtanium,” as it is rather hard to obtain due to the richest source being located amongst the native population: the ten-foot-tall blue alien beings known as the Na’vi. Jake Sully, a paraplegic former marine, is selected to utilize a remote-controlled artificial Na’vi body called an “avatar” so he can gain the native’s trust and maybe convince them to move, though there are tons of problems he has to overcome, not the least being that he starts crushing hard on Neytiri, the daughter of the chief (and seeing how she’s a hot blue alien played by Zoe Saldana, can you really blame him?). Can Sully help the humans and Na’vi reach a peaceful conclusion, or is the warmongering Colonel Miles Quaritch gonna get his way and start routing the natives out by force?

Interestingly, a lot of the movies that people claims this ripped off came out after this movie had been written; Cameron’s been working on this movie since 1994, when he wrote up an 80-page treatment for the film. He wanted to start working on this after Titanic, but the technology of the time just wasn’t right to fulfill his vision. Frankly, it’s a good thing he waited, because as I’m sure you know from all the praise it got, the visuals in this film are simply stunning. The Na’vi, the creatures of Pandora, the forests, all the glorious details of this alien planet and its inhabitants are just incredibly well done. If this had been done earlier, there is no way the Na’vi would have avoided the uncanny valley as well as they did; as it stands, they’re probably one of my favorite alien races in fiction, just from the visual standpoint alone. How good this movie looks compared to the story - which by comparison to the groundbreaking effects is rather basic - would almost make you think this film is just style over substance…

...But I’d argue that’s not exactly the case. While it’s glaringly obvious that the effects are the biggest draw, the story is still enjoyable and solid. It may seem rather derivative, but that’s mostly because in the span of time the film took to get made everyone and their mother cranked out environmental films or films about aboriginal people being joined by an outsider who learns from them and then fights back against people encroaching on their way of life, especially during the 90s. This movie quite frankly has an edge over all of those films; for one, this film looks way better than any of them, even Pocahontas (which is undeniably a beautiful film to look at). It also helps this film avoids the, uh… unfortunate implications that often come with these kinds of stories. I’m not here to get to into this aspect of those kinds of movies, but in the hands of less talented writers and directors there tends to be really nasty undertones. While Jake Sully does help lead this foreign culture to victory over their technologically advanced foes, it’s more due to him having knowledge of how humans work combined with the skills the Na’vi themselves have. Neither would have won without the other’s help. So yeah, the story is pretty simple, but pretty good. Not truly groundbreaking or original, but it really doesn’t have to be.

While I will say the story is the weak point, it IS carried by some truly great characters… just not Sully. While he’s a decent protagonist and all, he’s quite frankly overshadowed by just about everyone around him, with three enormous shadows being cast by Grace, Neytiri, and Quaritch. Grace is played by Sigourney Weaver. That is literally all you need to know to understand why she utterly steals every single scene she’s in, but for the sake of this review, let me explain in a bit more detail: her establishing character moment has her awakening from her avatar pod asking where her cigarette is, she openly is suspicious of Sully being added to the avatar program, she is the most honestly sympathetic and noble character in the entire movie, and her avatar is a stunning work of CGI. There’s really not a bad thing I can say about her; she’s basically Ellen Ripley with a more positive attitude towards aliens. She takes no shit and she does all she can to keep these people from being exploited by the greasy corporate shitweasels, no matter what she has to do. What a fucking hero. Can you see why Sully just seems kinda weak in comparison?

Then we have Neytiri, played by Zoe Saldana. She’s gorgeous, she’s badass, and she has quite the likable personality. She almost singlehandedly gives Sully a basic rundown on how not to die and spends most of her early screentime saving his ass. This was one of Saldana’s big roles in 2009 alongside playing Uhura in the Star Trek reboot series, and it brought her tons of praise, fame, and helped get her typecast as “Badass space babe with colorful skin.” Without this, Gamora might have gone to a less impressive actor who wouldn’t have been able to showcase the emotional range required, so at the very least I’m thankful to this movie for that.

And now finally, and perhaps most importantly, we come to Colonel Miles Quaritch, played by Stephen “You wished he was Cable until they cast Josh Brolin” Lang. Quaritch is what seems like such a simple villain: a military man with some serious bloodlust, a guy who just seems to be itching to go to war. But really, there’s a lot more to him than that. One really gets the sense Quaritch really does believe what he’s doing is for the betterment of humanity, and he doesn’t go right to gunning down the Na’vi even when he’s given the word to remove them by force. There are a lot of ways to interpret him, but frankly, no matter what way you cut it he’s at the very least genuinely concerned with the safety of his subordinates (outlined in his establishing scene); this leads him to becoming probably one of the single most badass anti-villains ever conceived. The man frequently steps out into the hostile atmosphere of the moon, holding his breath, to take shots at foes before putting on a breathing apparatus. He jumps out of an exploding plane in a mini-mech, which he uses to get into a knife fight with Sully. And every heinous and violent action he takes is one he takes to protect men from dying, something he has seen far too much of. And while this makes him sympathetic to a degree, his utter disdain of the Na’vi and his bloodthirsty attitude also makes sure you want to see him gets what’s coming to him.

There’s some side characters here and there that are good, but it’s mainly these three carrying the story when it starts seeming a bit too basic for this lofty world Cameron has built. And really, this is a fantastic world he’s created. This is truly a stunning film visually, with some flavorful characters to ensure that the vision doesn’t wear on you throughout the running time. For the most part, it really does work; guess that’s just the magic of James Cameron.

This is a very good film. Not the greatest film of all time, but definitely an enjoyable, ambitious, and groundbreaking one. If I ever make a list of the best sci-fi films (and you know I will eventually), this will most certainly be on there… somewhere. It’s at least top 25 material. While Aliens and the first two Terminator films are definitely the best stuff Cameron has done, this is still quite an impressive piece of pop sci-fi he created; if you like environmental movies, science fiction, creative worldbuilding, awesome visuals, or James Cameron movies, this film is worth a watch. Hell, it’s worth a watch if you’re a fan of Weaver, Lang, or Saldana too, because their performances really drive this film. It’s a good movie, plain and simple.

...Though I don’t think it’s good enough to warrant four sequels. Fuck off, Cameron.

[oscopelabs]

Ignite the Light: How Katy Perry’s “Firework” Brings Scenes From Three Very Different Movies to Life by Josh Bell

When Katy Perry’s “Firework” begins playing for the first time in Jacques Audiard’s Rust and Bone, it’s not especially noticeable. The song is part of the background music at Marineland, the aquatic park where Stephanie (Marion Cotillard) works as an orca trainer, one of several upbeat pop songs that serve to get the crowd excited during the routine animal performances in the outdoor amphitheater. It’s only after the minute-long section of the song has ended, and the soundtrack has shifted to tense orchestral music, that it becomes clear how indelibly “Firework” will be seared into Stephanie’s psyche, probably for the rest of her life.

The presence of contemporary pop songs like “Firework,” especially in mainstream Hollywood movies, is usually unremarkable and often little more than an afterthought, with songs just as likely chosen for marketing purposes as for artistic ones. But filmmakers with strong visions can harness the undeniable power of a huge pop hit like “Firework” and transform it into an essential storytelling tool, as Audiard does in Rust and Bone and as the directors of the far more multiplex-friendly movies The Interview and Madagascar 3: Europe’s Most Wanted do as well. It may be a coincidence that the filmmakers behind all three movies chose “Firework” for the most pivotal and memorable moments in their films, but it’s no coincidence that Perry’s empowerment anthem has the ability to speak to artists with very different creative goals.

Written by Perry along with Ester Dean, StarGate, and Sandy Vee and taken from Perry’s 2010 album Teenage Dream, “Firework” is one of Perry’s biggest hits, and it seems tailor-made for the movies, with its soaring earworm chorus and its inspirational lyrics that are specific enough to stick in your mind (the singular use of “firework” is especially uncommon) but generic enough to apply to almost any situation involving believing in yourself and pursuing your dreams. It’s not necessarily a great song, but it’s the right song for what each of these films is aiming to convey at a particular moment.

The second time that “Firework” surfaces in Rust and Bone, about 50 minutes after the first, its significance is clear: Stephanie is now in a wheelchair, following an accident that left her legs severed below the knee. The choreographed performance between orcas and trainers, set to “Firework,” was the last thing she experienced before her terrible injury, and the song is now a symbol of the life she’s lost and has struggled to rebuild. Much of that rebuilding has come from her burgeoning relationship with Ali (Matthias Schoenaerts), an underground mixed martial-arts fighter and itinerant laborer who has shown her more compassion and patience than anyone else in her life. The two have just had sex for the first time, in a scene that is sweet and passionate and a little awkward, and Ali has left Stephanie’s apartment with a casual farewell that doesn’t match her clearly stronger feelings of attachment.

Vulnerable yet undaunted, Stephanie sits on her balcony, Audiard’s camera first capturing her from behind. As Audiard cuts to a side view of Stephanie, she slowly starts miming the hand motions from her aquatic performance, first in silence and then as “Firework” gradually fades in on the soundtrack. As it does in most instances in all three of these movies, the song begins here with the line “Ignite the light and let it shine,” sparking the light in Stephanie’s eyes as her hands are outstretched and open. The song builds to its chorus as her motions become more confident, forceful. Her expression goes from wistful to triumphant, her hands poised and powerful, pumping to the beat. As the song continues to play, Audiard cuts to Stephanie, using a cane and her new prosthetic legs, walking for the first time into the empty amphitheater where she used to perform. She’s finally found the inner strength to confront her trauma, and while a lot of that came from Ali, plenty of it came from Katy Perry, too.

There’s a surprising amount of emotional power to the use of “Firework” in Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg’s The Interview as well, even if it first appears as the target of a somewhat obvious joke. Vain talk show host Dave Skylark (James Franco) and his more pragmatic producer Aaron Rapaport (Rogen) have traveled to North Korea to interview dictator Kim Jong-un (Randall Park), an apparent superfan of Dave’s vapid celebrity-interview show. They’ve also been tasked by a CIA agent (Lizzy Caplan) with secretly assassinating Kim, although Dave has started to bond with the lonely despot, who has a secret fondness for cheesy American culture.

What better representative for bubblegum American pop in the early ’10s than “Firework”? When Dave and Kim are sitting in a Soviet tank that Kim says was a gift to his father from Joseph Stalin, Dave turns on the internal sound system, to Kim’s protests, and soon “Firework” starts playing softly (beginning, of course, with “Ignite the light and let it shine”). Kim stammers that he’s never heard the song before, but Dave the ugly American loves Katy Perry, and immediately starts singing along. That opens the flood gates for Kim, who admits to loving margaritas and identifying with the opening line of “Firework.” “You know Dave, sometimes I feel like a plastic bag …” he begins, and Dave finishes: “Drifting through the wind?” Kim does a little dance, and their bond is solidified.

Rogen and Goldberg cap the joke by turning the volume up on “Firework,” shifting it from the tinny diegetic sounds of the tank’s internal speakers to blaring and pulsing on the soundtrack, over a montage of Dave and Kim triumphantly riding the tank through the adjacent woods, and then blowing up a bunch of trees as they sing along to Perry’s “Boom, boom, boom!” “Firework” goes from a secret guilty pleasure to the anthem of their friendship and their glee over wanton destruction.

It’s a silly, fun bit in a movie that mostly exists to turn serious geopolitics into silly fun, but that fun takes a dark (if still comedic) turn when “Firework” comes back near the end of the movie. Now disillusioned about their alleged friendship, Dave wants to expose Kim as a fraud, during the internationally televised interview. Pressing Kim to reveal his emotional weaknesses, Dave pulls out the one thing he knows will get a response: “I just have one more question for you: Do you ever feel like a plastic bag drifting through the wind, wanting to start again?” As Dave sings the lyrics, Kim breaks down crying, revealing to the world that he’s a scared little boy inside. If it’s possible to feel sympathy for a cartoonish version of Kim Jong-un in a gross-out comedy, then this is the point at which that happens.

Directors Eric Darnell, Conrad Vernon and Tom McGrath don’t have nearly as much on their minds for their use of “Firework” in the third Madagascar animated movie, but the song nevertheless provides the backbone for the movie’s most visually inventive sequence, probably the most memorable moment in the entire Madagascar series. For reasons that are far too convoluted to get into, the series’ main zoo-animal characters—lion Alex (voiced by Ben Stiller), zebra Marty (Chris Rock), hippo Gloria (Jada Pinkett Smith) and giraffe Melman (David Schwimmer)—are hiding out with the animals of a circus traveling through Europe, and they need to wow an American promoter in order to get a contract to perform in New York City (which will bring the zoo animals home).

After witnessing the sad state of the circus acts, the main characters take it upon themselves to overhaul the entire show, despite their complete lack of circus knowledge. There certainly isn’t a lot of realism in the Madagascar movies, but Europe’s Most Wanted takes things in an especially absurdist and surreal direction, even before the trippy “Firework” sequence, which is entirely divorced from physics or logic. The make-or-break performance opens with surly Russian tiger Vitaly (Bryan Cranston) attempting to re-create a legendary stunt that went wrong, as he jumps through a flaming hoop that looks about the size of a wedding ring. After he somehow manages that feat, the crowd goes wild, and Vitaly extinguishes the tiny ring of fire, picks up the baton that was holding the ring and places it in the ground—and the movie transforms into a kaleidoscopic dreamscape.

There’s no gradual fade-in as “Firework” starts here; this is not a movie interested in subtlety. Once again, it begins with “Ignite the light and let it shine,” and the light here is literal: There’s an explosion of color as Vitaly’s baton activates a swirling, multi-colored platform like something out of a Las Vegas Cirque du Soleil show, only reaching impossibly high, taller than even the tallest circus tent. There’s no sense of physical limitations as the movie presents a bear on a motorcycle riding perpendicular to the crowd in the stands; dogs on rocket-powered skates shooting out what look like actual fireworks; Alex and sultry jaguar Gia flinging themselves about on rings of pure colored lights (which then become cannons to shoot other animals into the air); Melman and Gloria walking tightropes that are simply beams of light; and elephants shooting multi-hued flames from their trunks. The crowd goes wild, but it’s impossible to tell where the crowd even is, in relation to the performers.

On the Europe’s Most Wanted DVD commentary track, the directors note that editor Nick Fletcher specifically cut the circus sequence to “Firework,” demonstrating how important the song was to the movie’s development. Rogen, too, notes the importance of “Firework” to The Interview’s creative process in his DVD commentary: “Katy Perry is fucking cool as shit, and the fact that she let us do this is cool as shit,” he enthuses in his typical blunt manner. For his part, Audiard is more reserved about Rust and Bone’s wheelchair “Firework” scene, although it’s easily the movie’s most emotionally powerful moment, and a distillation of Cotillard’s masterful performance, as she conveys Stephanie’s difficult journey in just a few looks and hand movements. It was Cotillard, Audiard says on the movie’s commentary track, who convinced him to shoot the scene, which was initially just two lines in the script that he wasn’t sure he wanted to include. He ignited the light, and then she let it shine.

[neoraven]

Movies I Watched December and January

I wrote these at Letterboxd. There were a few I rated and had nothing to say. 

I’m trying to do a thing with 1997 / 20 years later. I started with Metro. It was going to be weekly. Oops.

Jack Reacher: Never Go Back 2016 ★½  22 Jan, 2017 I was left wondering who was this movie for? Cobie Smulders keeps making great performances in things that don't deserve her. The ceiling of this is Bottom-Tier-Bourne-Sequel, made even more bizarre by Tom Cruise being a part of it.

Metro 1997 ★★★  20 Jan, 2017 20 Years Later. Movie #1 1/17/1997

Eddie Murphy, generally coasting on his Beverly Hills Cop coattails, stars as a hostage negotiator slash generic cop. This was Murphy's only movie after the huge success of The Nutty Professor in 1996. He lost to Beverly Hills Ninja over MLK Weekend at the box office. Michael Rappaport is hilariously miscast as a button down, bookish cop type protégé for Murphy to insult. Carmen Ejogo is the thankless girlfriend and damsel in distress. And finally, Donal Logue kind of stands out as the only actual hostage situation the hostage negotiator encounters.

So, the movie. Like I said, they drop the hostage negotiator thing pretty early as this shifts into a generic loose cannon cop chasing guy that killed his friend story that Eddie has done at least 5 times across 2 franchises. The script doesn't really give its star much time to shine and be funny, but Eddie Murphy is still Eddie Murphy and manages to liven up a dumb horse-betting subplot. The action sequences are pretty big, filling out a budget of $55 million. The largest involved a runaway cable car and more than a passing resemblance to Spider-Man 2.

It's a little generic and joyless, but just falls on the side of good for some of the random R-rated flourishes that manage to push this above being a star-studded Law & Order episode. His friend's stabbing death looked more like something out of Scream than an action movie. The director would go on to helm "Gifted Hands: The Ben Carson Story".

Metro. The 65th most popular movie that year at the box office. A minor speed bump in Eddie Murphy's career that never really came together. Jettisoned into January, it still ended up a minor hit, almost recouping its bloated budget.

And it's the first I'm doing of this. Series? Project? Of looking back at 1997 releases 20 years later. I'm going to roughly try to go in chronological order, but I reserve the right to watch stuff whenever.

Blue Streak 1999 ★★★½  20 Jan, 2017 Lean and mean and very pleasantly above expectations. Also shoutout to the villain from The Mask still getting work.

Planet Terror 2007 ★★  19 Jan, 2017 Shoulda watched Death Proof.

Arrival 2016 ★★★★½  16 Jan, 2017 god-DAMN

La La Land 2016 ★★★★★  16 Jan, 2017 god damn it

Jason X 2001 ★  13 Jan, 2017 just lol

Wild Wild West 1999 ★★★  04 Jan, 2017 I dunno what Kenneth Branagh was paid, but it wasn't enough.

True Lies 1994 ★★★½  01 Jan, 2017 This is undoubtedly a great action movie. But the whole middle subplot with Bill Paxton is so gross.

Warcraft 2016 ★★  01 Jan, 2017 This wasn't as bad as I thought. It's even a little wild. But it feels like a prologue to something I never wanna see.

7 Days in Hell 2015 ★★★★½  31 Dec, 2016 I could not stop laughing during this. Kit Harrington surprised me.

Don’t Breathe 2016 ★★★★  30 Dec, 2016 I'm on board for every Fede Alverez/Jane Levy collaboration

The Accountant 2016 ★★★  29 Dec, 2016 Overstuffed, but well-shot. Felt like an entire season of television crammed into one long pilot episode. I don't mean that as an indictment of TV, more just the volume of subplots that could carry an episode on their own. Here they're reduced to 5-10 minutes, or throwaway lines and flashbacks.

The Accountant was frustrating. It wasn't very satisfying with the ending so open-ended, like a pilot. And a few of the good ideas and set ups are going to remain half-baked forever.

Inferno 2016 ★★  29 Dec, 2016 Tom Hanks' Bad Acid Trip starts out with some pretty unhinged visuals- death and people with backwards heads and such. The story settles down to being on the silly side of stupid, with Hanks' doctor reacting to an anagram with the zeal of a kid on Christmas morning early on. So I can't be too harsh here. But it's still pretty bad, even for Ron Howard.

Blackhat 2015 ★★★★½  28 Dec, 2016 I was enthralled.

Central Intelligence 2016 ★★½  26 Dec, 2016 Rock and Hart are fun, and there's a hint of an interesting and disturbing story at the edges here. But most of this is a mess. It just feels lazy and stop and go at times as the plot and tone yo-yo's all over the place. There are still some cool action sequences to be had with Dwayne Johnson, and plenty of funny parts as well. But it still never really comes together into something.

Also, worth noting that this is the third movie that has had an emotional climax by The Rock stripping himself naked to a crowd. Joins Walking Tall and Furious 7.

Ride Along 2 2016 ★★★  26 Dec, 2016 I loved the first one, and this was one gratuitous sequel that managed to be worthy. It's not that much more than a bigger, much slicker Law & Order episode. But the Kevin Hart/Ice Cube pairing goes a long way. Olivia Munn and Ken Jeong were fun additions to the group who I wouldn't mind seeing in a sequel a la Lethal Weapon. The action scenes were all really fun and varied. The videogame stuff is mostly annoying every time it's brought up, but the mix of visual effects in the car chase where Hart drives were undeniably cool.

The Night Before 2015 ★★★★  25 Dec, 2016 A++ Christmas Movie.

Bad Santa 2 2016 ★★½  25 Dec, 2016 Extremely lazy sequel wasting Octavia Spencer as a prostitute and Christina Hendricks as a sex object, but manages a surprising amount of laughs.

The Invitation 2015 ★★★★  24 Dec, 2016 I enjoyed this a great deal, and the ending shot is some classic shit.

Blair Witch 2016 ★★  23 Dec, 2016 It's essentially a remake and a sequel, but mostly brings the worst qualities of each to the table.

Book of Shadows: Blair Witch 2 2000 ★★  23 Dec, 2016 Felt like a chopped and screwed remix of the first movie. But not really as fun as that would be literally.

The Blair Witch Project 1999 ★★★★  23 Dec, 2016 A classic.

The Purge: Election Year 2016 ★★★★  22 Dec, 2016 There's a lot going on here related to the actual election and what I'm sure the filmmakers thought was going to happen in November. Is this horror movie now the rosy fantasy that we'll look back on and pine for in 2019? I hope not, because I hope we'll have Purge 4, 5, and 6 by then. Or the TV show.

The Defender 1994 ★★★  21 Dec, 2016 "After all, I am an assassin, and you are just a lowly defender!"

Also I admire the tricks used to remove guns from parts of action sequences.

Deepwater Horizon 2016 ★★★★  21 Dec, 2016 There's a great and thrilling disaster movie here wedged between two embarrassing bookends. It starts with Mark Wahlberg's plucky daughter helpfully explaining the science* of his job/the premise. The real life epilogue with real testimony was also a bit too much. But at least there was the joy of seeing Trace Adkins' angry family member billed in the credits as "Massive Man".

*whatever technical basis or explanation for what happened got abandoned halfway through the big explosion

Mascots 2016 ★★★  18 Dec, 2016 Reheated Christopher Guest leftovers are still pretty good.

The Finest Hours 2016 ★★½  18 Dec, 2016 This is all very solid and okay. The parts not out at sea are an ANCHOR dragging the movie down.

Incarnate 2016 ★½  17 Dec, 2016 This movie is mostly a weird slog, and it never tries to look appealing. Most of the action takes place in dark rooms. And the term "action" is used loosely. Anyways, my hopes for Inception-laced Nightmare on Elm Street visions were dashed pretty quickly. But I did get a few chuckles out of the stupid science explanations and Aaron Eckhart's performance.

Masterminds 2016 ★★½  16 Dec, 2016 A smattering of very funny small performances and scenes. Nothing really comes together into a great laugh or exciting story. Jared Hess still is not a great comedy director. But this was way too disjointed and sloppy to really have a chance.

Spectral 2016 ★★★½  15 Dec, 2016 This movie tries on a few different hats, and wears them all just fine. You have a little bit of Aliens when the badass marine types take on the unthinkable force. It's Black Hawk Down when they take on the [fake spoiler alert] ghosts in the bombed-out city. James Badge Dale is even a little bit Tom Cruise from Edge of Tomorrow as the sci-fi type thrust onto the front lines. His transformation from fish out of water to hero stays pretty steady throughout the movie's different phases. Clayne Crawford, now of Lethal Weapon and Rectify fame, also has a slightly memorable turn as one of the ghostbusters.

I loved the mix, but it's obvious why this never found a release date, sat for months, and finally got shuttled off to Netflix. But it definitely isn't terrible.

Deadpool 2016 ★★  14 Dec, 2016 Near the end, "a CGI character" tells Deadpool about the four or five moments that make up being a superhero. Unfortunately, a few good moments do not make up a good superhero movie. For all of the sixteen walls that were supposedly shattered, this got old fast.

I don't think I can fully hate it. The few jokes that land are really good, and there's a general weird tone that is missing from most spandex movies. But I can't really like it either when it still shares the other boring 75% of every other spandex movie.

Hell or High Water 2016 ★★★★½  14 Dec, 2016 Fucking amazing. Except for a couple awkward heavy-handed lines. And I also had the thought during most of it, "what if there was a pair of bank robbers without polar opposite temperaments?" Like. They don't have to both be buttoned-down or both be "Ben Foster in every single movie i've ever seen", but, ya know.

Kickboxer: Vengeance 2016 ★★★  12 Dec, 2016 I'm probably more than a little swayed by the split screen during the credits imitating the JCVD dance moves from the first. The lead is kind of boring, but this still never really drags too long. It's really thankfully competent.

Jason Bourne 2016 ★★★  12 Dec, 2016 Alicia Vikander's amazing performance and Vincent Cassel kicking the vehicular mayhem up a couple notches in the final sequence is almost enough to make me forget the previous dour 90 minutes. Still not bad.

I Spit on Your Grave 1978 ★★★  11 Dec, 2016 I only watched the half where she slaughtered all the men.

Mechanic: Resurrection 2016 ★★½  10 Dec, 2016 I spent a significant portion of this movie thinking it was a Transporter reboot.

The Magnificent Seven 2016 ★★★★  09 Dec, 2016 Magnificent is a really strong word, but it was really, really good.

The Legend II 1993 ★★★  08 Dec, 2016 The sequel forfeited a little of its heart for bigger and more bombastic action sequences. It's still very funny, though, and a couple of the more elaborate fight scenes surpass anything in the original.

Ben-Hur 2016 ★★  08 Dec, 2016 The chariot race was extremely dope.

The Legend of Fong Sai Yuk 1993 ★★★  04 Dec, 2016 There were some incredibly crazy-cool fight scenes.

[andrearadya]

Waterfalls and Their Rainbows

My mind has been a very intricate wide fantasy, just like my life. My heart is made of pieces it ever turned into. I’ve been so vulnerable, surrounded by unpleasant circumstances that I used to call ‘home’, ‘friendship’, ‘my circle’- which finally turned into fake sanctuaries. I went through some phases when I persistently expected people to at least like me, appreciate me, respect me for anything that I already did, for who I really am. However, their toxicity and falseness poisoned me with pain, betrayal, disrespect, and broken trusts. I felt really unworthy, like many times before, and the ticking time only killed me day by day knowing that inside of my madness, nobody cared. When I showed up with the signs of being rejected and intimidated, no one came to heal the pain. It hurt and burnt me even more.

I turned into someone traumatized, I turned my ambition down, and I got more hopeless thinking about my future. One time I finally decided to start telling my beau about everything happening, I broke in tears several times on the phone, and I told him I would always love him, but I wasn’t sure I would be able to build my future with him, to build a family with him, and to have ‘forever’ with him. I was so traumatized and torn apart by the fact that I couldn’t trust anyone anymore, having a relation with people would just drain my emotions, and I feared terrible things would ever happen again. I didn’t want to continue my life, again. I didn’t want to get frustrated anymore. I didn’t want to be a wife who would always be restricted by her husband, her whole family. I didn’t want to have kids who would hate their parents for always fighting and arguing over silly shits. I didn’t want to live in a prison. I didn’t want them. All I thought was I wanted to avoid anything bad that could happen anytime.

After several conversations on the phone, he finally told me things making me think again. He never judged- not even once. He listened to me even though I cried all night like a highly drunk dude. He’s a very loyal, loving, and soft-hearted man I really, really believed in. He told me that I didn’t need to rush things, honestly. Whatever I decided, whatever I thought about- It could change one day. And our time would still be long that I could re-think and re-decide things again. I honestly thought it was my final decision- but undeniably, he’s right. Moreover, he told me that he always liked my will to fight hard, to be ambitious, to always be hungry for knowledge, talents, and dreams, thus he would never ever restrict me for all of those, and he told me that I could always reach my dreams no matter what, because those would always make who I’d become. I tried to believe in every single word that he said, realizing that I loved him so much, and I had never met someone like him before. I started to believe that he would always be there to support me, because he’d always loved me, and he would always do.

Time went by and I got better. I healed myself, got rid of things and people always tearing me down before. I got myself some therapies, I started to focus on myself, and so on. I forgave and forgot, tried to clean myself up from unnecessary things and people. However, I got so many hard lessons I gotta always remember for the rest of my life.

Then, several days later, my beau came to visit me. It was kinda unplanned, but he finally came and as the day passed by, we could really enjoy our moments, we had an extremely beautiful day, and I was so, so, so happy. My mind was really blown that we could have some quality time together. I don’t know, but that date felt entertaining much.

The next day we had a lunch at my favorite restaurant and it was our first time there, because we could never get there previously. I really enjoyed it, every moment we saw, the pavements, all the buildings around, the vibe- just everything. However, one thing really important was him and me. I was so happy we could finally date there, have a precious lunch there, like-finally. Among all of the simplicity, we were there, happily.

Long short story, we continued our journey that day and we spent a lot of time chilling at a cafe, shopping, obsessed over a restaurant menu, searching for cooking ingredients, and relaxing at my house. We arrived at my house and directly planned on cooking together, and finally we did. I was so, so proud of him- he was a great chef I was so moved, lol. I believed in every step he took, like, I was absolutely sure he was gonna make it- he was gonna make the food tasty as hell. He knew things, I don’t know but that kinda woke my instinct up- I started feeling he’s gonna be a very talented, great, down-to-earth life partner. A husband. My forever lover.

After that, we had dinner together, enjoying our food and that was hella great. Then we sat behind my Christmas tree and we relaxed together, had our own quality time, we watched some movies until he had to go. That might not be too long, but I really enjoyed the way everything and he were so cozy, I felt so relaxed and comfortable around him, I felt relieved, loved, accepted, trusted, appreciated, and worthy. We owned that Saturday until that day ended, but the memories would never fade away. The feeling that he brought me, the moments we spent together, the little things we cherished together- those were absolutely perfect that I couldn’t rethink about them again without crying.

I could never get tired of loving, appreciating, and looking at him, his face, his look, his charm, his eyes, his hair, his loving soul, his down-to-earth personality, and his intelligence. I’ve always been really grateful he could be a great companion for me, he wanted to spend the whole days with me, and he could always love and accept me for who I am. He never judged- my look, my make-ups, my hair, my physical look, my weirdness- everything I am. He always loves me for who I am, the soul I am, the body I live in, the dreams I make to achieve, and all of my effort in this life.

Those moments ensured me even more that, he’s the man. He’s the one. Concretely, he really healed me, gave me relieves, and calmed me down at the times I felt dying, painful, torn apart. He ensured me that together, we would make this world better, and we would make one another’s more beautiful. I’m just so, so happy, grateful for everything he is, and I couldn’t ask for more. He’s the best and he’s just enough for me.

So many times in my life I tried to fit in for the people who never appreciated me. I prayed all the time for the guys who never even looked back at me, insisted the reality to turn its tables. I wanted to be loved, for who I was, I didn’t care if I felt hurt or disrespected, but I finally already achieved that point where I decided not to love again, but that was 5 years ago, when he finally shook my hand on my birthday and touched my heart differently. He made me realize that it all would never matter anymore. I’m already enough, worthy, and powerful on my own without having to forcefully impress other people.

After several conversations on the phone, I finally told him:

“I don’t know, but our recent dates were really impressive and deeply beautiful, after all the big and little things that we spent together, I got ensured more that you’re a very loving person, you’re so lovable, and you got that angelic heart with such soft soul inside you- and those changed my mind, I guess. Remember when I told you I didn’t wanna have a family with someone? Realizing that you could be a great lover, husband, and father, I just think that maybe I will want to have kids someday. Maybe I’ll like to build a more harmonized, beautiful, and cozy family someday, with you. Maybe I’m still doubtful a bit, but maybe someday, I won’t be.”

To him: I will never, ever trade you for anyone, anything in this universe. You are the world I can always call home, I’m so glad that I can always have a lovely friendship with you, and you’re always here, loyal inside my circle. Thank you so much for ensuring me that love is not always full of pain, harm, scars, terrific liars, betrayals, haunting nightmares, and traumatic scenes. Thank you so much for all of the love and appreciations you bring me, come what may. Thank you so much for being the only one of you for me. I love you so much and much more, then, now, and forever- even if one day it ends in English Channel.

Love,

Andrea

[omniversalobservations]

On Tuesday, four Ringer staffers assembled in the company’s studio to draft imaginary movie characters and debate how well their imaginary teams would fare in imaginary battles with each other. Deputy editor Mallory Rubin was ruled the victor by judges Jason Concepcion and David Shoemaker, but not without controversy. So, the team managers and one of our judges have gathered here to defend their choices. We’ve also included teams selected by other staffers, who had the privilege of selecting any heroes on the board, as well as some of the best teams submitted by our readers.

***

Jason Concepcion: Mallory had the strongest team and I ruled as such. Amanda’s team gave Mal some matchup problems, it’s true. But ultimately, that’s not enough to swing the outcome. The Flash can get Magneto’s helmet off before the Master of Magnetism can even comprehend what’s happening. Then Professor X shuts him down, and Doomsday and Silver Surfer go in and clean up. I’m aggrieved that certain people (i.e., the people who I will not name and who designed this system, which included numerous misclassified heroes and an unfortunate punctuation error pertaining to Dark Phoenix) who don’t understand comic books, or really how a fantasy draft should be run, disagree with this decision. But it is correct and it is final.

Mallory Rubin, a.k.a. The Ringer’s Superhero Draft Champion: I’m tempted to just say “Scoreboard” and leave it at that, but despite what the violently competitive tenor of Tuesday’s live draft might have indicated, I’m a team player! While I will not be goaded into relitigating this entire process—a process that left me with a metaphorical crown on my head and very real pride in my heart—I’ll gladly [extremely Binge Mode voice] offer a brief refresher on what actually transpired when I built my team.

Here’s my victorious squad, presented in the order in which it was drafted:

Round 1: Iron Man (No Powers) Round 2: Doomsday (Villain) Round 3: Professor X (Born With Powers) Round 4: The Flash (Acquired Powers) Round 5: Silver Surfer (Cosmic Powers)

I’d like to quickly stress the “order in which it was drafted” point: It’s really dope that a bunch of Ringer staffers, viewers, and readers are getting in on the fun by constructing their own teams; it’s worth remembering, though, that they can do so absent competition. Picking against three other people in a live snake draft introduced a crucial variable into our shared experience: unpredictability. And so I attempted to account for that by crafting a strategy built on the power of scarcity.

Cosmic Powers is loaded, undeniably the deepest group of the bunch. Why take a character from that category no. 1 overall (cough, Chris Ryan) when you can wait and still get great value there in Round 5? Conversely, I identified early in my draft prep that the No Powers bunch was a wasteland, far and away the weakest in the game. I knew that if I got the clear top pick in that field, I’d be as well positioned as I was after selecting second baseman José Altuve in the first round of one of my 2017 fantasy baseball drafts.

And so I took Iron Man, whose riches, brilliance, technological capabilities (Hulkbuster, my dudes!), leadership, and battle experience made him great value regardless, and exceptional value given the putrid state of the No Powers field. I got Gronk in a tight end pool full of Ben Watsons.

In hindsight, I have only one real regret about how I argued my case at the end of Tuesday’s draft, as the coffee exited my bloodstream, the room of formerly cherished colleagues turned against me, and Amanda attempted to blind judges and viewers alike with her team’s sexiness. A large portion of Amanda’s argument, the judges’ (brief) support of her team, and Chris’s pro-Amanda betrayal of yours truly hinged on Batman’s plot armor, a.k.a. the belief that he’d figure out a way to beat my team, because he always figures out a way. Yet Amanda had already thrown her star game-day player under the bus, saying on Tuesday, “I was going to take Iron Man, so I think I’ll just take poor man’s Iron Man and go with Batman.”

A large portion of the pro-Amanda sentiment also more correctly hinged on Magneto, an undeniably formidable foe. But as soon as I drafted Professor X, who bafflingly fell to the third round despite being the clear top pick in the Born With Powers category (the second weakest of the five fields), I knew I’d need to account for the Magneto Problem other teams would try to use against me. That’s why I pivoted to selecting the Flash despite the availability of other characters, like Captain America, whom I’d ranked above him in Acquired Powers. This draft didn’t exist in a vacuum; I had to react not only to the team I was building, but to the teams others were building. Worried that Magneto will turn Iron Man into a tin can or render Charles irrelevant? I’ve got my dude Barry Allen on the case: Before Magneto could even think to act, Flash would rip off his protective helmet, and feeble Erik would bend to Professor X’s will or get absolutely crushed by Iron Man or Doomsday (my choice!). And if the unthinkable occurs and I lose? Barry runs into the past. New game, new day, new hope. The Flash gives me a fail-safe.

The moment when I knew I’d won the draft came long before Amanda selected Magneto or I chose the Flash, though: It came at the end of Round 1, when ALL three of my foes had selected someone from Cosmic Powers, the most stacked category. They couldn’t select another character from that field, meaning I had the luxury of waiting until my final pick to target my CP player—who happened to be my no. 1 pick in that category and no. 2 player overall (again, for the purposes of this draft, where Iron Man earned my top ranking because of how I valued scarcity).

Silver Surfer is not here for your bullshit. His Fantastic Four cinematic presence might not have wowed you, but he’s a true force. He wields the power cosmic, can manipulate the universe's energies, can scale his strength, and is almost indestructible. If (perish the thought!) the Flash falters, Silver Surfer’s got that time-travel shit on lock. His surfboard also becomes a lot less silly when you realize he can control it with his mind. Oh, and he can absorb energy from anything, meaning he can pull (and has pulled!) the radiation out of Hulk, rendering him moot. The same principle applies to Superman, who, again, went no. 1 overall in our draft. My guy might be a little moody, but last time I checked, emotional fortitude was never Jean Grey’s or Batman’s strength.

Ultimately, in a 20-player draft, I wound up with three of my top four overall players (no. 1 Iron Man, no. 2 Silver Surfer, no. 4 Doomsday) and four of my top 10 (no. 8 Professor X). The only character I selected from outside of my personal top 10 was the Flash (no. 18), who provided such undeniable strategic value for my team that he elevated above his station. (Also, I know this is about movies, but TV Barry is really dope. Come at me, CW haters!)

As Professor X says, “I don't want your suffering! I don't want your future!” I want my future: The one where my team easily wins.

Micah Peters: Let’s set aside for a moment the fact that Blade, the movie Blade, the one that I was talking about, was born to a mother who was bitten by a vampire and therefore was—per the parameters that were agreed upon—Born With Powers. I can’t control the way the draft goes, but I can pick the most wild cards without obvious weaknesses beyond Not As Brawny As The Hulk or Superman. We don’t need to win a whole final series, we just need to frustrate the other team into a loss for a single game (fight). Take, for instance, Doctor Strange, who was tremendously undervalued, for reasons not lost on me. It’s not Benedict Cumberbatch’s fault that his name and face are so funny, but I assure you Dr. Stephen Vincent Strange is no joke. His powers include: … literally any and everything you can think of, and some other things you probably can’t. Matter and energy manipulation, interdimensional travel, mental possession, all of that. He is also technically immortal.

I’ll admit that War Machine was mainly for coverfire. But Black Panther? Also not a whole lot of weaknesses to speak of. In fact, the only way to beat him is for him to know nothing about you, which isn’t exceedingly possible. If anything could, at any point, be a threat to Wakanda—which includes everything inside of and outside of its borders, in whichever universe—then he’s researched a way to neutralize it. Or kill it, which he’s willing to do. The only reason that Captain America and Batman have thicker plot armor is because they’re canonically white, it’s just that no one likes to say so. As for General Zod, he’s just here because you still need someone to go toe-to-toe with the Class 100 dudes while TWO OF THE SMARTEST PEOPLE IN THE KNOWN UNIVERSE figure out the rest.

Chris Ryan: It feels weird to defend drafting Bryce Harper, LeBron James, and J.J. Watt, but here we are. I thought that picking mutli-tool players from traditionally powerful superhero programs (X-Men, Avengers, Justice League) would put me in a good position to win. I thought the draft more as a popularity contest, or drafting heroes I'd like to fight with (for the most part), and less like a Dungeons & Dragons game that involved a lot of planning for weaknesses. [Andy Reid voice] That's on me. I have to be a better general manager.

Amanda Dobbins: As previously discussed, I have seen 15-20 superhero movies out of professional obligation and have otherwise never sought out the content in any form. That said, I know a star when I see one—and as luck would have it, the true superhero stars are the ones that win the battle at the end of the movie. So my strategy was simple: pick the cool ones, and the rest will follow. Wonder Woman is a no-brainer in this context; Gal Gadot’s Diana is the only superhero character who has ever made me tear up, and her comic timing is impeccable. (Also, Greek mythology–related superheroes >> all other superheroes.) I wanted Iron Man but had to settle for Batman, the least bad option in that lame category. Magneto was played by Ian McKellen and Michael Fassbender in a turtleneck, so that’s a layup. I like Chris Evans. And finally, I picked Jean Grey because my friend Sean Fennessey told me she was a good mutant, and I didn’t feel like investigating further. Thank you for your support. My team should have won. Staff Teams

Jack McCluskey:

No Powers: Iron Man Acquired Powers: Spider-Man Cosmic Powers: Wonder Woman Born With Powers: Professor X Villain: The Joker

My superhero team has it all:

- young energy (Peter Parker is best as a fast-talking teen, and you know it); - earned wisdom (Charles Xavier’s been around a while, has seen everything, and can teach the next generation a thing or two); - righteous power (Wonder Woman, duh; haven’t you seen the no-man’s-land scene?); - deep pockets (between the glowering Bruce Wayne and the wisecracking Tony Stark, I’ll take the funny, brilliant inventor any day); - and pure, unadulterated chaos (as Alfred says in The Dark Knight, “Some men just want to watch the world burn”).

In this scenario, Professor X is the one calling the shots, Iron Man is the one financing and outfitting the team, Wonder Woman is the straight-ahead superhero focused on the task at hand, Spider-Man is making cracks and occasionally screwing up (as kids do), and everyone is trying to rein in the Joker, who is constantly undermining everything because he just can’t help himself. (He just wants to put a smile on that face, after all. And, yes, Heath Ledger is the Joker now and forever, amen.) Technological prowess, agility, power, brains, and unpredictability make for a potent (and entertaining) package.

Danny Chau:

No Powers: Batman Acquired Powers: The Flash Cosmic Powers: Thor Born With Powers: Iceman Villain: Apocalypse

My superhero team is actually built around my villain, Apocalypse, which means I have, for the first time in many years, successfully established an inverted pyramid.

The construction is centered around two of Apocalypse's powers: external energy absorption, and power enhancement. Thor is the God of Thunder, one of the most powerful heroes in the Marvel universe; on my team, he’s a handsome battery. The Flash is so fast he created the Speed Force, an otherworldly dimension that doubles as the source of his power; on my team, he is simply the liaison to a successful merger between the Speed Force and Apocalypse. Bruce Wayne is super smart and super rich, I’m sure he’d be able to figure out a way to augment Apocalypse’s power even further. That’s Phase 1.

Phase 2 involves Apocalypse’s ability to amplify the powers of other mutants. The classic read on Iceman is that he’s a font of untapped potential—the Kwame Brown of the X-Men. But imagine if Michael Jordan didn’t verbally abuse Kwame at every Wizards practice and instead was like, “Hey rook, let me give you all of my talent and indefatigable will to embarrass my competition.” Iceman is categorized as an Omega, the most powerful class of mutant there is. And with a nudge from Apocalypse, Iceman ought to be able to freeze all life across both cinematic universes.

Michael Baumann:

No Powers: Batman Acquired Powers: Winter Soldier Cosmic Powers: Silver Surfer Born With Powers: Professor X Villain: Magneto

The one must-have on this team is Magneto, who is the most righteous of superhero villains, and has shown he can work well with the good guys under the right circumstances. My hero with cosmic powers is the Silver Surfer, because Superman—an immortal being who has the power of flight, X-ray vision, and unlimited strength and stamina, and is literally called Superman—is the dumbest creation in the history of superheroes, if not all of narrative fiction. I don’t care how popular or powerful he is, I won’t have him on my team. Give me the guy who can travel faster than light and convert matter to energy and whose creation required more imagination than “God with a pair of neoprene briefs.”

Because Silver Surfer can do so much of the heavy lifting, I don’t, strictly speaking, need an ass-kicker on this team, which means I can carry Professor X, who can temper Magneto’s more destructive impulses and literally read minds, which also obviates the need for a sneaky reconnaissance person like Kitty Pryde, Nightcrawler, or Spider-Man. That means Winter Soldier doesn’t really fill a need, but the Acquired Powers category is light on people who do, unless you go with Reed Richards or the Hulk, and I worry about those two causing chemistry problems with Professor X and Magneto. There’s such a thing as too much brainpower.

Clearly you want a superhero who can harness the only cosmic force that eludes the Silver Surfer—capitalism—but why Batman and not Iron Man? So why the Winter Soldier, and not Deadpool or Captain America? The answer there is also chemistry: The team I’ve created is composed entirely of sad people. If Iron Man or Deadpool is in there cracking jokes or Spider-Man’s giving off his annoying teenage energy, that act is just going to annoy the rest of the team. Better to go full Listening To Nothing But Julien Baker, just so everyone’s on the same page.

Andrew Gruttadaro:

No Powers: Iron Man Acquired Powers: The Flash Cosmic Powers: Star-Lord Born With Powers: Wolverine Villain: Loki

What are we building a team for, exactly? Are we to assume the goal is global domination? Well, I’m a pacifist, so I’d rather build a team based on who would actually be decent to hang out with. In which case, look at that murderer’s row of fun personalities above. (Well, besides the very emotionally damaged Wolverine, but every crew needs a dark friend.) Can you imagine the witty banter these five would dish out? Star-Lord and Loki would get into a funny argument about galaxies, Wolverine would brood in the corner, and when Peter Quill inevitably compares himself to the Cars (or something), the Flash could chime in with a classic “I wasn’t even born yet” quip. And Iron Man could foot the whole bill—it’d be a great Friday night.

Also, for the sake of argument, I think these guys would put up a pretty good fight if any other superhero teams stepped to us.

Daniel Chin:

No Powers: Batman Acquired Powers: Hulk Cosmic Powers: Green Lantern Born With Powers: Phoenix Villain: Magneto

Every team needs its leader, and Batman is one of the smartest guys out there. The world’s greatest detective would have an answer for anything, and he’d be able to devise a plan that’d utilize each of his teammates to their fullest potentials. Like a young Steve Nash, this guy would bring the best out of everyone else’s games.

Hulk, a.k.a. “The Strongest Avenger,” is a wild card, no doubt, but his upside outweighs the risk. Put him toe to toe with any of the other big bodies on this list, and I’d bet money on the angry green guy every single time. His unparalleled strength makes him a worthy team member.

Green Lantern was a terrible, terrible movie, but that doesn’t stop him from being the ultimate utility man. Just like Ben Zobrist, put this guy anywhere in the field, and he’s going to come up with results. That shiny ring of his allows him to create anything his mind is capable of thinking up, whether it be a shield to protect one of his teammates or, I don’t know, a massive rock to drop on any of his enemies.

To not have a telepath on your team—someone who could rip apart the opposition by just getting in their heads (like Draymond Green)—would be a little foolish, I must say. Phoenix is the most powerful one in the X-Men universe. I do, however, wonder what she would do to this team’s already suspect chemistry. After all, she did kill the love of her life and disintegrate the guy who practically raised her. But, like Hulk, I think I’m gonna roll the dice on this one.

Lastly, Magneto provides the defense for this team. Not only does his helmet protect him from anybody trying to do some Jedi mind tricks on him, but Magneto (you guessed it) can manipulate metal. So if a member of your squad has any of that on him or her whatsoever—say maybe the man named after iron—then it’s already over. Oh, your team has Wolverine? Dope. With him anchoring down this All-Star lineup, no way any other stands a chance.

Kate Halliwell:

No Powers: Ant-Man Acquired Powers: The Flash Cosmic Powers: Silver Surfer Born With Powers: Professor X Villain: Hela

Professor X is an obvious choice from not only a powers-based standpoint, but from a leadership one. He can unite even the most ragtag team through sheer wisdom and charisma, and if that doesn’t work, well … he’s got the whole mind-control thing on lock. This one’s a given.

The Flash is an underrated ultra-powerful superhero, mainly because people tend to diminish his powers by saying he just “runs really fast.” Barry Allen can run *so* fast, he’s able to travel back in time. Imagine that awesome Quicksilver X-Men movie scene, but with the added benefit of time travel. Yep, Barry’s in.

The Silver Surfer’s powers are arguably limitless. While the technicalities of his powers tend to vary based on comic-vs.-screen interpretations, the consensus seems to be that he can at least travel across the galaxy, destroying (or healing) planets and peoples at will. In the better-forgotten Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer, it’s established that his only weakness is his board—without it, he loses access to most of his powers. But as long as we get him one of those surfboard-ankle connector things, dude is unbeatable.

Ant-Man may seem like the dead weight of the group, but in his solo Ant-Man film, it’s explained that using Hank Pym’s shrinking technology, Ant-Man can shrink between molecules and access the quantum realm, where space and time cease to follow the rules of nature. If anyone can help Scott figure out how to best wield this power, it’s Professor X. Also, you know, Paul Rudd’s one-liners will be good for morale.

Hela is a risky choice, but not when you’ve also got Professor X on the squad. As demonstrated by Scarlet Witch in Avengers: Age of Ultron, Thor is as susceptible as anyone to mind control. Since Hela is an Asgardian like her brother, there’s no reason to think Professor X couldn’t easily keep her in line. The Goddess of Death took down Thor, Loki, all of the Valkyrie, and thousands of Asgardian soldiers. Also, she looks like Cate Blanchett. I see no downsides here.

Source: The Ringer

(images via Twitter)

[staticscreenwriting]

Wonderful tonight // F.M.

Synopsis: Reader is Pope’s sister and her and Frankie have been dancing around each other for years. Now Pope is getting married and emotions are running high and Frankie and Reader are both single at the same time for the first time ever. It’s all about the longing, the yearning. 

A/N: This entire thing was inspired by that picture of Pedro in the header and how handsome he is. This is my first time writing for this fandom and I rewrote this story about 5 million times. If you like it let me know if you don’t then you can also let me know if you want. I did run this through spellcheck but it’s not really edited. I don’t have the time, honestly. Just ignore mistakes, please and thank you. Hope you enjoy.

[additional note: I am German. Sometimes I get the tense wrong or make mistakes. I am useless when it comes to punctuation. Go easy on me, please.]

“ One day I’m gonna stand right over there. I’m gonna wear an expensive suit and shiny shoes. I’m gonna get my hair done real nice, and probably have a flower pinned to my jacket. My hands will be clammy and my heart will be racing. There will be flowers, lots of them, all over the garden. We'll have a musician playing acoustic guitar. All my friends will be there, and — and our entire crazy family. And I’m gonna get married to the love of my life. Right here. And things will be good. People will be happy.” 

“ Mom will probably be crying. “ 

“ Oh for sure. “ 

As she steps out into the garden, (Y/N) can’t help but let her mind wander back to that one summer night a long time ago. Pope was fresh out of high school then, about to move out and start the rest of his life, away from home. Nights like these, sitting in the garden of their childhood home and sharing silly stories and hopes and fears, were numbered. That’s the thing about having siblings, it really only occurs to you how important they are to you when you’re faced with the idea of a life without them. So they sat there, on the steps of the porch, ice-cold cans of coke in hand and hearts open and vulnerable. Pope had never shared any of his dreams with her, not like this at least. But maybe him leaving home made him feel nostalgic too. 

Her eyes meet his across the aisle and he smiles at her with his signature Santiago Garcia smile, the one that’s gotten him out of so much trouble when he was younger, the one that looks so much like their mother’s. An ocean of flowers surrounds him, just like he said it would. And their entire crazy family has taken their seats, ready to watch him get married to the love of his life. (Y/N) has always been proud of her brother's achievements, in and outside of the army. But she’s never been more proud than today. 

Will softly links his arm with her’s as they walk down the aisle to take their respective places as bridesmaid and groomsman. The air is filled with the soft melodic strumming of an acoustic guitar and the perpetual scent of peonies. The rational part of (Y/N)’s brain knows that life isn’t like the movies but maybe, she thinks, sometimes life grants us a little moment in which we get to relish in a bit of that magic that makes those films so enchanting. 

Just as she’s predicted all those years ago, her mother is crying. Big happy tears roll down her blushed cheeks. If we’re being entirely honest, neither (Y/N) nor their mother had really believed they’d ever see Pope up there, wearing an expensive suit and shiny shoes and waiting for the love of his life to walk down the aisle so he can marry her and start their happily ever after. Then again, ever since he was little Pope always found a way to get the things he wanted if he only set his mind to it. The sky was and still is the limit for her brother and that is something (Y/N) is infinitely envious of and wonderfully amazed by at the same time.

As they reach the front, Will lets go of her arm and walks right to stand with Pope and the groomsmen and she walks to the left stepping up beside the maid of honor.

It all goes so fast from then on, one more bridesmaid and groomsman, the flower girls, then the bride. She looks gorgeous and she’s smiling the biggest smile. It’s one that just radiates with pure unfiltered joy. And there’s love in her eyes. So much love. The way she looks at Pope leaves no doubt about her feelings for him. It’s the most basic of all human emotions and yet the most complex to grasp though at that moment, in her eyes and his, it’s so clear to see and so easy to understand. 

(Y/N) feels her heart do a little stutter as she allows herself, for the first time that day, to let her eyes wander towards the row of groomsmen. This is, by all accounts, a bad decision that’s only gonna hurt. Self-destructive behavior is something she’s pretty good at though.

Frankie stands next to Pope like a rock, sturdy and determined and ready to catch him if he were to stumble or fall. That is something so enigmatic about Frankie. As flimsy and unpredictable he can be when it comes to himself, he’s incredibly loyal towards his friends and loved ones. He does not falter, does not shake. Not for his loved ones, never.

The dark blue suit looks good on him, it fits him like a glove and it must’ve been expensive. Though (Y/N) can’t help but feel like something is missing. This isn’t the Frankie she knows. The one she —. Granted, it’s been years but still, there’s something funny and peculiar about Frankie in a fancy suit. 

His lips are pulled up in a small, gentle smile. One that makes a comfortable warmth settle in (Y/N)’s heart. This man is both so familiar and yet so complicated. He’s been a constant in (Y/N)’s life for a long while now, ever since the first time Pope brought him around for dinner. Even without any blood relation, those two are brothers through and through. Will and Benny too. Those four, forever bound to one another by the horrors they’ve seen, the pain they’ve felt, and the family that developed along the way. 

(Y/N) loves those boys, they are as much a part of her family now as they are of Pope's and yet, something about Frankie always felt different. From the first moment, their eyes met, the air filled with a strong magnetic pull. Invisible but palpable. It was always special. Always. Frankie is the kind of guy one can call at 3 am because you’ve heard a scary sound and don’t feel safe and he’ll jump into his car and come check it out for you and protect you, no questions asked. And he never wants anything in return. He just gives because that’s what his heart tells him too. The world, (Y/N) thinks, needs more people like Frankie.

He’s not without his issues, far from it really, and (Y/N) can acknowledge that. But the sum of his faults does not undo the size of his heart. Somewhere along the way of their friendship things changed. It was a gradual change, slow and steady like water down a stream. Glances lingered, hands kept brushing more frequently and the air held a perpetual sizzle of static. Though neither of them ever admitted it, they both knew it was there. Hell, even the boys, foolish and naive as they could be, noticed. It was a well-known secret.

If life really was a movie, the two of them would’ve gotten a happily ever after by now. A dance on a rooftop, a kiss in the rain, a soft indie song leading them into the end credits. A gentle epilogue to a slow burn romance.

But life really isn’t a movie. Everything seems to be working against them. Mostly time and cultural conventions. This man is her brother’s friend. Her brother’s brother. You don’t date your brother's friends, that’s like an unwritten rule. But time is probably the worst of their enemies. It never seems to be on their side. They’ve never been single at the same time. Frankie went through several more or less serious relationships and while (Y/N) hasn’t found anyone to settle down with permanently, there’d been men she lent her heart to.

Last year, just a few weeks before Pope swept his band of merry men off on their suicide mission to Colombia, (Y/N) moved back home after ending a 3-year relationship. Dave was — he was nice. Nice and secure and stable and boring. Something about him felt too squeaky clean. That night, looking at old pictures of herself and the boys that were proudly displayed on the fireplace in her parent’s living room, it became abundantly clear to her that Dave wasn’t the problem. The problem was that Dave wasn’t Francisco. She’d really set her mind to it then, to pull herself together and muster up the courage to finally seek a conversation with him about the elephant in the room they both had refused to acknowledge for so long. She’d been determined. Then Pope dropped a bomb on her.

“So Frankie and his girl are having a baby.” 

And from that moment on she refused to let herself entertain any thought of her and him having any kind of future that went beyond being friends. It hurt, god it hurt like hell. But dreaming of things that could never be wasn’t doing her any good either.

Seeing him now, looking all snazzy in his suit and smiling, it sends a familiar shive through her body and makes the moths in her stomach go crazy. If only life was a movie. If only.

The ceremony passes in the blink of an eye. There’s happy tears, lots of them but love shines brightly through it all. Every glance, every touch, every word spoken. As her brother and his new wife make their way down the aisle, (Y/N) dares to take another glance towards Frankie and, for the first time that day, he’s looking back.

The world doesn’t shift or shake right then, doesn’t spin out of its axis. Nothing fundamentally changes but the air feels different. The electricity is back. The magnetic pull. The undeniable attraction. Just like that, they are both thrown back into this everlasting limbo of what-ifs.

(Y/N) looks away before her heart can break further, knowing what could’ve been and what can never be.

Weddings have this strange side effect of making you think about your own romantic entanglements. It’s not necessarily a bad thing or a sad thing. It’s just a fact. Seeing other people’s love being displayed so prominently, being celebrated, it makes you wonder. Will I ever find this kind of love? 

“ You know, I think you and I gotta have a talk.” Pope’s voice holds a certain edge to it, a teasing tone she’s heard so many times growing up.

“ About what? Shouldn’t you be dancing with your wife right now? “

“ Ah, she got caught up in a conversation with her aunt, something about corgis. Once that woman starts going there’s no stopping her. It’s — it’s a lot.” 

“ And you left your wife behind to fend for herself? What a way to start life as a married couple.” 

Pope gives her a chuckle and their silly banter makes (Y/N) feel like a kid again.

“ So I’m gonna need you to talk to Fish. “ 

“ Huh? “

“ Oh don’t play dumb. I’ve known you your whole life, kiddo. I know when something’s going on with you and something is definitely going on.” 

“ What’s my emotional turmoil got to do with Frankie?” 

Her older brother raises his eyebrow in mock offense. As if to say “you really think I’m that dumb?” 

“ You two have been throwing looks at each other all day whenever you think the other isn’t looking. Subtlety really isn’t either of you's strong suit. “ 

That, (Y/N) thinks, must be absolute nonsense. Frankie’s got a girl and a baby, there’s no reason for him to sneak glances at her. Clearly he’s gotten his happily ever after already and it doesn’t involve her. Pope must be delusional. Must have a head filled with cotton candy and all things rose-colored.

“ You’re on a wedding high, my guy. There have been no looks. “ 

Her words are met by Pope shaking his head in frustration. “ Look, I just — just please go talk to him. This dancing around each other is very high school drama and I love you both which is why I can’t watch this going on any longer. “ 

“ What are you saying?” 

“ That if there’s something there worth um — worth exploring, you don’t have to worry about me or my opinion on it. “

If anyone had ever told her those words would ever leave her brother’s lips, she would've called that person crazy. Not that they change anything, he’s still got a woman at home and a baby. But still — it’s nice to know that if things had worked out differently, Pope would approve.

“ Are you saying that if I wanted to date Frankie — which I don’t, but like let’s pretend I did. Hypothetically. You’d be okay with that? “ 

“ (Y/N), “ Pope says and his voice dips lower as his expression grows more serious “ I love both of you. I just want you guys to be happy. “ 

Before either of them can continue the conversation, the bride steps up beside them, throwing her arms around Pope’s middle and facing (Y/N) with a big, radiant smile on her face.

“ Sorry I had to interrupt but I needed to get away from aunt Lisa and her Corgie stories.”

“ Nah it’s okay, don’t worry I uh — I gotta go talk to someone. “

Pope smiles at her in return and a silent understanding passes between the two. Maybe the story wasn't all that hypothetical after all.

Much to (Y/N)’s delight, Frankie sits alone at the table. His suit jacket is lazily thrown over the back of the chair and the sleeves of his shirt are rolled up to his elbows. This looks more like the Frankie she knows. The one she loves. Effortlessly cool and yet so undeniably charming. 

Sliding onto the chair next to his, she can feel her heart speed up with anxiety. She shouldn’t feel this way around him. Underneath all the feelings, this is still her Frankie, one of her best friends, a member of her little family of misfits.

“ Hey, you. “ her words are soft, delicate, almost as if she’s afraid of saying them. And maybe she is. A little bit at least.

“ Hey, stranger. Long time no see.”

His voice is dark and soothing but there’s an edge to it, a hint of teasing. 

“ Mmh. It’s been a while. “

“ Yeah, and with the way you’ve been avoiding me all day today, it makes me wonder if I did anything wrong. “ 

Oh god.

“ Dude, what’s it with everyone thinking I’m avoiding you? I’m not. “ 

“ You sure about that? “ Frankie asks and raises his eyebrow in question.

“ Yup. Just been a — a busy day. I’d never avoid you, I missed you. “ 

At least the last part of that statement is factual. She’s missed him terribly. 

“ I missed you too “.

There’s a truth in his eyes, a grounding honesty that is so hard to come by in people. Whatever words fall from his lips they are deliberate and he means them 100%. It’s something (Y/N) has always admired and appreciated about him. 

“ Sooo … I was hoping you’d bring a plus 1 today. “ 

“ Huh? “

“ The baby ! “ 

“ Oh. Oh, I think it’s way past her bedtime by now. She’s uh — she’s with her mom. “ 

“ Do you have a picture? “ 

Frankie scoffs, “ One? I got a bunch of ‘em. How much time have you got? “ 

As he pulls out his old battered leather wallet, (Y/N) can’t help but let a smile take over her face. It’s so fitting that he would carry the pictures around in his wallet instead of having them saved on a phone. Frankie was never the guy to get all obsessed with having the newest technological gadgets. Though he was smart as hell and good at navigating any and all electronic devices, he never felt the desire to own a smartphone himself only having caved and bought one a year ago when his old phone died on him. 

“ That’s her. Just celebrated her first birthday. “ 

The girl in the picture is undeniably Frankie’s daughter. She’s grinning up at the camera with his exact smile only she’s missing a few teeth still. Her eyes are the same soothing shade of brown and are rimmed by the same thick black eyelashes. She’s gorgeous and something about seeing her sends a pang straight to (Y/N)’s heart. What if …

It was one thing knowing that he was a dad but actually seeing his baby and realizing that’s his new reality, it’s strange. And while (Y/N) is happy for him, a part of her has a hard time coping with that realization. What if things had worked out differently, could that have been her life too?

“ She’s adorable. “ 

“ Yeaaah, “ Frankie replies and shrugs his shoulder casually, “ guess I did a pretty good job there. ‘s the first time in my life. Only thing I ever did right. “ 

Though he tries to shake it off and veil his words with a tone of mockery, (Y/N) can see right through him. The self-depreciation has always been a point of contention to her. How he can not see how wonderful he is, how loyal and sweet and loving, is beyond her.

“ Shut up, Frankie. Except for my brother, you’re the only guy I know that would drop everything to help me paint my kitchen at 1 am on a Tuesday. You’re so sweet and funny and I have not a single doubt in my mind that you’re an amazing dad. Stop selling yourself short. “ 

For a moment a quiet settles upon them that is neither comfortable nor awkward. It just is. And then Frankie looks into her eyes again and the moths are back going haywire. If only her future lay in those eyes, oh how wonderful yet foolish of a thought. 

“ Ah, I don’t know. Her mom doesn’t seem to think so. Left just before her first birthday. I mean — “ he sighs and takes a sip from his bottle of beer “ things between us hadn’t been good for a while and a breakup was inevitable. It’s just that I wish I could see the kid more. She’s my heart. She’s my everything. I want to be good enough for her, you know? So one day she can be like that’s my dad and he’s a pretty alright guy. Not that’s my dad, the ex-addict unemployed pilot. “ 

“ Frankie. That kid's gonna love you so much, now and forever. Because you love her. That’s all that matters. When you think about your childhood, do you think about your parents’ jobs? No. You think about how much they loved you and the good memories you had with them. “ 

Frankie stays silent for a moment, just looks at her with his big brown eyes, and then — then he smiles. 

“ Can I tell you something? “ 

“ Always.” 

“ When she was born. When the doctor let me see her and hold her for the first time. I wanted to call you. You’re the first person I wanted to talk to about her. I was so fucking terrified at that moment because she was so tiny and the world is so big and scary and I don’t know how to not fuck things up for her and how to protect her from it all. And you, when I’m with you I never felt scared, ever. You’re so good at making me feel like I can do everything and at making me forget about my own shortcomings. I wanted to call you so bad. “ 

“ Then why didn’t you? “

He averts his gaze for a moment, as if it’s a secret that weighs heavy on his heart. One he hasn’t told anyone before. One he isn’t sure he’s ready to share.

“ Didn’t wanna bother you. “ 

That’s not the truth. She can tell immediately. Frankie is a lot of things but he’s not a very good liar, at least not to the people that know him very well. Though she doesn’t push the situation any further. 

“ Pffsh. Bother me …” 

“ Didn’t think your boyfriend was gonna be okay with me calling you in the middle of the night. “ 

“ Well fuck him. “ 

Frankie raises his eyebrows in surprise. “ Huh “

“ Yup. “ 

“ Didn’t work out? “

“ Nope. “ 

“ Why’s that? “ 

Cause he isn’t you. That’s what she wants to say. That’s what rests on the tip of her tongue just waiting to be spoken. She doesn’t say it though, doesn’t have the guts. There’s an overwhelming sadness about getting your heart broken at a wedding and it’s not something she wants to experience today.

“ Just didn’t work out. Realized he wasn’t who I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. “ 

“ So you’re not gonna be the next one inviting me to a wedding and making me wear a stupid fancy-ass suit? “ 

“ No way. First of all, you look hot in this suit and you know it. Second of all, nah. I feel like this isn’t in the cards for me. I want —  I want a guy that I can call at 3 am to get chocolate chip pancakes at the diner and that will run through the garden sprinkler with me when it’s hot outside and that will ask me to slow dance at a wedding even though the song that’s playing is super cheesy and overplayed. Dave was sweet and he was secure but I always felt like something was missing. I loved him but we were never friends. I think that’s what I was missing. “ 

Their eyes meet again and a shiver runs down her spine. There’s a tension in the air so thick one could cut it with a knife. And for a moment, just a fleeting moment, one that passes in the blink of an eye, there’s the courage she’s been looking for for so long. The one that helps her push the words from the tip of her tongue and speak them. For the first time. Finally.

“ Frankie, he wasn’t y— “ 

“ (Y/N), Darling. It’s time for your speech. “ 

At that moment she wants to strangle her own mother. That courage? It’s never gonna come back. This was her one chance and it’s not gonna come back ever. Oh god, what is Frankie gonna think? What’s gonna happen to their friendship ?! 

“ Yeah. Yeah, okay. I’ll just. Okay yeah. I’m coming. “ 

She doesn’t dare even as much as glance back at Frankie. Though before she makes her way over to her seat where the mic is already waiting for her and the speech she’s so meticulously planned, she hears him call out to her.

“ (Y/N)! “ 

“ Hmm…? “ 

“ I lied. I didn’t call you when the baby was born because I thought It was extremely inappropriate to call the woman I’m in love with while the mother of my child is recovering from giving birth. “

The moths in her stomach are gone now. There are bats now. Maybe a swarm of birds. Something bigger than moths for sure. Her whole body feels like it’s on fire and simultaneously being splashed with ice-cold water. Her heart is beating faster and her hands are clammy and all she can do is stare and get lost in his eyes and his smile and this moment that seems unreal.

“ Honey? “ 

Her mother’s words break the spell and (Y/N) follows her to take her place at the table. The mic feels heavy in her hand though everything else feels weightless. Maybe, she thinks, this is what love should feel like. Weightless. Easy. Magical.

There’s a piece of paper in her sparkly clutch with a long and sentimental speech written on it all about love and finding your soulmate and all that stuff that, until today, she always felt like she didn’t really know anything about except for what they tell you in the lovesongs on the radio or the rom-coms on tv. And yeah maybe it’s still too early to feel like the world is an entirely different place now but those words he said, she’s been waiting for those words for over a decade. If there was ever a moment to romanticize her own life, to relish in the feeling of being loved, and to celebrate her own successes, it’s today.

The pre-written speech stays in the purse. Instead (Y/N) takes the mic and starts talking. Straight from the heart.

Across the room, her eyes meet Frankie’s and all she can do is smile, for it’s the first time in a long time where her future isn’t so scary. It’s exciting. Maybe everything else that came before was just the prologue and her story is just now about to really begin.

“ Hi. I’m (Y/N), I’m Santiago’s sister, and uh — I wanna talk to you about love. “ 

Weddings are hectic and busy affairs. There’s something going on at all times and it’s impossible for (Y/N) to find even a second to have a proper conversation with Frankie about — well everything. So much time had been wasted between them, on keeping their feelings locked up and trying to find the right moment. Now the moment is here and the conversation doesn’t seem so scary no more. Now the only thing that stands between them is this wedding. There are speeches then food then cake then more speeches then a picture slide-show one of the bridesmaids put together then then then. It’s never-ending and though it’s fun and (Y/N) enjoys celebrating her brother’s love, she wishes time would pass quicker right then. If only for once, time could be on their side. 

Only when the newlyweds have left the venue to spend their wedding night at a fancy hotel nearby and most of the guests have cleared too, (Y/N) finally finds time to sit down and just relax for a moment. No speeches to listen to, no uncles who insist on getting one dance with her, no bride who needs help holding up her dress while she pees. Just calm and quiet and —

“ Can I have this dance? “ 

His hand is reaching out to her and there’s a nervous smile playing on his lips. There’s something quite intoxicating about it all now that she knows he feels the same. All the anxiety is gone and replaced with hopes and dreams of a future that now seems like it might actually happen. One that’s been a “What-if” for so long.

“ It would be my pleasure. “ 

Neither of them is a particularly good dancer but it doesn’t matter right then. All that matters is that they get to exist together at that moment and in their little bubble. That they get to be close and sway left and right as Eric Clapton’s “Wonderful tonight” echoes through the room.

“ That song is so cheesy and overplayed, “ (Y/N) exclaims, “ I love it. “ 

Frankie places a soft kiss on the top of her head and it sends her heart into overdrive. Is this what the lovers in a Jane Austen novel felt like when their hands locked for the first time, just a fleeting whisper of a touch?

It feels exhilarating and (Y/N) feels alive and like nothing is missing. Everything and everyone is right where they’re supposed to be.

“ You ever thought Pope was gonna end up actually getting married? I didn’t see that one coming to be honest. “ 

(Y/N) leans her cheek against his chest as they keep softly swaying to the song. A tiny content smile settles on her lips.

“ Actually, yeah. It was always part of his plan and you know him, if he sets his mind to something he usually ends up succeeding. “ 

Frankie nods in response. “ Talking about your brother, we had a uh — a conversation earlier.” 

“ Now why in the world would you do such a thing? “ she jokes though not for a second does she lift her head off of his chest. He’s warm and soft and she can just about make out his heartbeat. This feels too comfortable to disrupt it for even a second.

“ He kinda implied that he wouldn’t mind if you and I — “ 

He stops, considers his words, rearranges them. 

“ If we what? “ 

“ Started dating? That sounds wrong, that makes us sound like teenagers. “ 

“ You know, it’s funny because he implied something awfully similar when I talked to him earlier. “ 

“ Huh. weird. “ 

“ Ya think that maybe this, “ she says and gestures between the two of them “ is also part of his plan? “ 

Frankie shrugs and moves his hand to her jaw, softly stroking her cheek with his thumb.

“ He always gets what he wants, guess we can’t break the chain, huh? “ 

“ Guess not. “ 

They’re so close. So unfathomably close. His warm breath falls onto her skin and he can smell the flowery scent of her perfume. The air around them sizzles with electric anticipation. 

Back when she was a kid, (Y/N) was obsessed with the Disney Cinderella movie. Everything about it felt so magical and wonderful and life held the sweet bliss of childlike wonder and innocence. And then she grew up and witnessed her heart breaking over and over again. 

Now that she’s standing here, in the arms of the man she’s loved for so much longer than she can remember, she thinks that maybe the movie wasn’t all wrong. Yeah, maybe it’s an overly sugar-coated fairytale where happy endings are guaranteed and things get fixed with a song and the help of some critter sidekicks. But the underlying message of them all, the most fundamental truth of them all is that love is worth believing in even when life gives you so many chances to lose hope. 

Just like the fairy godmother has said: Even miracles take a little time.

This kiss, warm and gentle and passionate, is a miracle in itself. If only for the fact that it has taken over a decade for it to finally happen. His lips meet hers and the world spins faster and slower all at once. If this was a movie, they’d probably show a montage of all their happy memories throughout their years of friendship, all the longing glances, and flirty touches. But this isn’t a movie. This is real life. She’s really dancing with him. He’s really kissing her. 

She doesn’t have to imagine any of it anymore because it’s happening right here and right now and life is so much better than any movie or romance novel or cheesy pop song. They can never live up to the real thing.

Neither of them wants to pull away though eventually their lungs demand oxygen and they reluctantly detach their lips. 

“ You think we should, give this thing a chance? “ 

Once again there he goes being so casual. As if this is not a decision that’s been in the making for such a long time now. An accumulation of years of longing and wishing and hoping and constantly missing the right moments and bottling up feelings.

“ Francisco Morales, I’ve loved you for a long ass time now. I am not letting you go anytime soon. Ain’t no getting rid of me, buddy. “ 

“ Good, I’m not planning on it. And I love you too, by the way.“ 

They seal it with a kiss and life feels like it always did only — better. Everything feels so damn right. The what-ifs are gone and in their place now stands a future worth looking forward to. One filled with adventure and happiness and love.

“ Hey, (Y/N)? “ 

“ Hmmm ? “ 

“ You wanna go get pancakes at the diner around the corner? “ 

“ With chocolate chips? “

Frankie scoffs “ Duh. What a question. “ 

There’s a lot of comfort to be found in romantic media though as they walk outside the venue, hand in hand and matching smiles on their faces, (Y/N) thinks that every once in awhile life itself makes for the best movie, the most magical moments and the greatest love stories. 

[ahouseoflies]

The Best Films of 2016, Part III

Part II is here. Part I is here. PRETTY GOOD MOVIES 74. Life, Animated (Roger Ross WIlliams) The film hits most of the marks that it needs to, but it sort of backs into drama in a way that doesn't help it. It starts with an adult functioning with autism, then flashes back to the subject's more uncertain, perilous childhood, then tries to push into his future with lower stakes. I'm not sure what other structural option it has though, and it does manage a depiction of a loving family and a few laughs. The animated sequences add nothing. 73. Mike and David Need Wedding Dates (Jake Szymanski) There are just enough laughs to overcome the formulaic nature, the whole "I sell liquor with my brother, but what I really like to do is draw." What struck me the most is that the four principals are all dumb characters, and the film never wavers on that. There's no straight man, which kind of makes the audience the straight man. The best laugh is when Anna Kendrick stitches together a lie about being a hedge fund manager without having any idea what hedge funds are. Or when Adam Devine admits that he uses the word "assuage" and hopes that no one asks him what it means. None of the other characters roll their eyes, and their sincerity presents the viewer with an interesting dynamic. 72. Hush (Mike Flanagan) Hush is kind of a trifle, and the dialogue isn't going to win any awards. But it takes you on quite a ride in 83 minutes, going for extreme without ever being far-fetched. The best movies of this type resist explaining a motivation for the killer, and I was glad this one didn't try to give him any kind of a connection to the protagonist other than his own sadism. It helps that John Gallagher Jr. excels by playing against type.

71. Sunset Song (Terence Davies) Almost pornographically obsessed with the passage of time, Sunset Song is a good story told well. If that sounds like faint praise, it is. I wish I saw the yearning, creative beauty that other people have--my reaction to The Deep Blue Sea as well. To me, the film works best when it holds its nose and sinks into the melodrama (PTSD HUSBAND PTSD HUSBAND PTSD HUSBAND). When it's more concerned with stateliness, I started to get bored. And by "get bored," I mean "mimic the dialect of every 'nae,' 'bonny,' and 'bairn.'" It's an addictive game. 70. 13th (Ava DuVernay) 13th is a briskly-paced, logically-structured doc, and the ending was downright moving. But, as unkind as this might sound, I think it's ideal for a woke high school kid, not a discerning adult. Is the only goal of the film to teach me something I didn't know? Is that a fair thing to judge on a rubric for a documentary? All I know is that it felt entry-level to me. 69. A War (Tobias Lindholm) Eventually the film approaches a tense question of ethics, but it sure does take a while to get there. The setup is yeoman's work, a necessary evil, but I struggled to stay involved. I say that I want a war film in which every life matters, but in practice it ends up feeling small in both focus and scope. Once the film becomes a courtroom drama, however, it's absorbing--possibly because we can concentrate on the stoic but desperate adult characters and leave behind the badass child who pulled down the homelife scenes. Definitely because the courtroom scenes are efficient and understated, unlike every Hollywood courtroom scene ever. Denmark seems like a chill place to live, even for the working class. 68. The Shallows (Jaume Collet-Sera) The Shallows has some nice thrills and a bit more character motivation than the audience usually gets. Blake Lively has a heartfelt scene with a GoPro late. But relax if you think it invents or subverts anything. Collett-Sera seems to be making a habit out of impossibly tidy denouements. I was going to modify "denouements" with "Can I take you out for coffee sometime?" But then I realized that his previous film literally ended with "Can I take you out for coffee sometime?"

67. Pete’s Dragon (David Lowery) I give a lot of credit to David Lowery for providing a filmmaking signature to one of these Disney live-action remakes for the first time. The epilogue is just as lyrical as anything in Ain't Them Bodies Saints, and I'll take any Leonard Cohen song I can get in a movie of this type. There's a maturity to the picture--it starts with a five-year-old's family dying--that places it as a film for an underserved audience, someone eight-to-eleven. At the same time, it's a bit pleased with itself, too complacent to be funny at all, too brusque to develop the supporting characters beyond "What a jerk, right?" (Eight-to-eleven is the perfect age to ask your parents, "Why would boo marry a guy she doesn't like?") And the dragon himself traipses the uncanny valley in a way that makes the close-ups look right but the long shots look fake. Finally, shout-out to Robert Redford for starting a truck with a pocketknife on some Jean Reno shit. 66. Zootopia (Byron Howard, Rich Moore, Jared Bush) A "yeah...but" movie if there ever was one. Yeah, it's unassailably cute with detailed world-building, but then it devolves into plot overdrive in the final third like all of these movies do. Yeah, it's probably an engaging enough half-genre movie if you've never seen one, but the clues seem arbitrary if you've watched hundreds of detective movies. Yeah, the overall message is one worth making, but it's the least subtle film I've seen in some time.

65. Kubo and the Two Strings (Travis Knight) I had my usual reaction to Laika animation: impressed but a bit distanced. The storytelling is efficient here, with most scenes standing in for literal steps of the hero's journey, but the emotional beats work a lot better than the action, which is amazingly fluid but takes away from some of the weighty qualities that I liked about stop-motion animation in the first place. Gone also are the dense, cluttered environments that I liked so much in The Boxtrolls. As always, the studio has produced a film that is not quite for adults and not quite for children, but they have undeniably pushed the medium forward. 64. Holy Hell (Will Allen) The footage on hand, twenty years of videography of a cult, is almost too good to pass up, even if the material from the present can't fully support it. I'm glad that something came of the decades of manipulation and abuse that the director went through. Every once in a while, one of the talking heads will mention something chilling, like that he didn't have a bank account or that the cult leader forced her to have an abortion. By the end of the film, it's difficult to even look at Michel, who is such an absorbing villain that, were he not real, you wouldn't believe him. But those chills are few and far between. Especially at the beginning, which could have used some titles to provide context, none of the victims stand out. In fact, the film almost correlates that all of the victims were weak-minded in the same way. I doubt that's the point, and who am I to judge the people themselves? But I did think I would have had more empathy if any of these people stood out by expressing anything other than regret. The movie's subjects aren't capable of the insight that would take the film to the next level. 63. War Dogs (Todd Phillips) "You like the new [Todd Phillips]?" "The early stuff. The new stuff, he's trying to be [Scorsese]. He should be himself." Good performances and a bit of that blurry line between satire and admiration overcome terrible needle drops and a tired, bear-at-the-door voiceover structure. If you laugh at Jonah Hill calling the young Jordanian translator Aladdin, then you're more on the diverting side than the derivative side. I laughed. 62. The Edge of Seventeen (Kelly Fremon Craig) Plenty funny and plenty poignant, but rarely at the same time for me. As usual, the movie sort of settles into itself once it discards voiceover. Steinfeld's performance is the real star here since it takes what could have been a whiny character and imbues her with real anguish in a way that sort of makes up for some writing shortcuts. She's angry and sexual in ways that we don't often see in cinematic teenage girls. I was puzzled by the Erwin character, a nice dude who comes and goes whenever the film needs him to. He's more of a device to measure Nadine's growth than he is a full character treated fairly. Then it occurred to me, this being a film written and directed and starring women: He's a female vision of the manic pixie dream girl that I've seen in countless movies designed by men. Nicely done with his blankness, ladies. I get it. 61. Author: The JT LeRoy Story (Jeff Feuerzeig) If you hang out with a crazy person for an extended period of time--and as a person who has spent time in New Orleans bars, I feel confident speaking on this--there's a pattern that emerges. At first, the crazy person is interesting and funny just because his thought process is so much different from your own. He quickly becomes tedious, and you feel guilty because, even though you're engaging with him genuinely, the conversation is starting to feel like a game. Maybe the problem is you and your straight life. Then you become worried for the person, who might be dangerous. At a certain point, you can't wait to get out. You start planning your escape. Then, once you extricate yourself, you feel pretty grateful for this bizarre encounter that you learned from. Laura Albert, the subject of Author: The JT LeRoy Story, is a crazy person, and I went through that same journey with this documentary. Celebrity marks in order of how silly this movie makes them look: 1. Gus Van Sant (always) 2. Asia Argento 3. Michael Pitt 4. Matthew Modine 5. Winona Ryder 60. Morris From America (Chad Hartigan) Slightly lacking in scope, especially for taking place in such a grand setting, Morris From America still offers a poignantly realistic father-son relationship and a few heartbreakingly intimate moments. (We've all made out with a pillow, but how many times have you watched someone else do it?) Since it has similar ambitions to Chad Hartigan's previous film This Is Martin Bonner, I'm wondering why my response wasn't as enthusiastic. I think it has something to do with the stakes created by the characters' pain. Morris is written with pathos here, but it's hard not to believe that a thirteen-year-old boy living abroad is going to figure things out. A man in his sixties, played by a haggard-looking dude, might not. 59. 10 Cloverfield Lane (Dan Trachtenberg) At the exact moment I was supposed to be amazed by the expansion of the film's world, I tuned out. Up until that point though, I really liked the cautious ratcheting of the conflict, as well as the attention to detail on the set design. It's refreshing when the woman-in-peril makes decisions that are as smart as what the audience would do in the same situation; I'm pretty sure Winstead's Michelle is even smarter than the average viewer. 58. The Invitation (Karyn Kusama) People who love this film probably relish how long it builds tension to get to the real horror stuff. People who hate it probably resent that it takes so long to get to its inevitable conclusion. I'm somewhere in the middle. It's certainly no surprise where the film is going, and the characters' roles are a bit contrived--this one's the jokester, these are the lusty gay guys. But the script takes great care with the escalating details.The culty organization at the center of the dinner party is rooted in a grief that the film takes seriously. The flashbacks are loud fragments with the overwhelming quality that a memory has in real life. And the final shot before the black out both ties the movie to its genre tradition and expands the scope in a juicy way. 57. Embrace of the Serpent (Ciro Guerra) For most of its running time, Embrace of the Serpent asks textbook questions about colonialism, and the parallel stories seem unbalanced. (About forty-five minutes in, the 1949 story comes back, and I had almost forgotten about it.) The black and white photography works but only as a sort of corrective to how these things are usually shot, not as a statement itself. Then, however, in the final thirty minutes, everything deepens. Karamakate, the Amazonian guide character, bristled earlier in the picture about a photograph of him, considering it an empty copy of his spirit. When the film expands, it's because he's levying the same idea at Evan, the dumb American who seems like a copy of the earlier White explorer. It's the sort of relative mysticism that the film had been working for all along.

56. Nerve (Ariel Schulman, Henry Joost) The ending's moral imperative left me rolling my eyes, but Nerve was a fun ride until that point. I give a lot of credit to the filmmakers for not belaboring the rules and limits of the game at the film's center; after some painful "I used to have a brother" exposition, they just wind the machine up and let it go. There are a lot of different pieces rolling at one time with solid balance, and some compelling ideas surface, such as the game's manipulation of its players with their own acknowledged preferences. The entire idea of the game's demands escalating is silly--the evil neutral of the Internet would ensure that the second dare would be "kill your parents." But the stars sell the silliness until the movie works because of it, not despite it. 55. The Club (Pablo Larrain) A searing, urgent, intimate drama that inquires honestly about the origins of perversion. Yet anyone who has seen it can tell you the exact moment that it goes off the rails. 54. Hidden Figures (Theodore Melfi) The type of crowd-pleasing crowd-pleaser that pleases crowds on a coldest nights of January. Melfi's hand guides the film past a clumsy opening and a structure that all but separates the three leads into a television-style A-B-C plot. There are a few too many record-scratch, "I didn't think you would be...a woman..." moments for my taste, but the biggest payoffs, like a real tear-jerker of a proposal scene, are less telegraphed. I think Hidden Figures is a film that is clean--inoffensive, slick--but not sanitized. Most of the bits that illuminate institutional racism, such as Katherine's half-mile trek to the nearest "colored" bathroom, still hit. There isn't a weak performance in the bunch, but Janelle Monae is a Movie Star, and Kevin Costner shines as a secretly great type of movie character, the dude who is so concerned with excellence that it, like, never occurred to him that racism existed. Huh. Weird. 53. Finding Dory (Andrew Stanton, Angus MacLane) I liked a lot about this movie. I liked Ellen DeGeneres's vocal performance, a demanding role that she nailed. I liked the animation of the interiors, which Pixar keeps getting more photorealistic with--I caught myself reading the warning on the side of a coffee carafe. I liked most of the emotional beats that came from the valuable subtext of raising a special needs child. I liked the bit with the sea lions too. However, at what point is the emotional manipulation too much? I'm okay with these films being engineered to make people cry. It works most of the time. But how far is too far? Is it watching the equivalent of a handicapped girl struggle as she comes to terms with probably being lost from her parents forever? Are we close? I'm just asking. And as much as the film straddles those emotional boundaries, it also strains at the logical stuff. Not to WELL ACTUALLY a children's movie, but an octopus drives a car. If Pixar movies are supposed to be evaluated on the same scale as adult movies, then I can't just let that go.  52. Nocturnal Animals (Tom Ford) Tom Ford the writer kind of holds back Tom Ford the director with this intriguing but awkward riddle of a film. The screenplay feels like a first draft, laced with suggestions of a theme about art as a product versus art as an intention, but without the elbow grease to give the characters inner life. Once the action of the present begins to overlap with the action of the past and the action in Edward's novel, the film gets more playful, but that just reveals how unfinished it feels. (Is Edward's novel supposed to be trashy? Is he objectively a bad writer, despite the effects the novel has on Susan? Is the novel's tone so different from the main action because he's trying on a sadness that Susan owns? I'm not sure Tom Ford knows the answers to any of these questions.) And it's a shame because the direction is pretty assured for someone with as few reps as Ford. He takes the stateliness and melancholy of A Serious Man, then scuffs it up a bit with the more handheld Texas sequences. And of course all of the clothes are pretty, which I don't think will ever go away with him. That well-worn "I could watch her read the phonebook" line extends to watching someone read a book, pull it close to her, and stare sadly out the window. Amy Adams is really good. In fact, all of the actors are selling characters that are just kind of types on the page--sometimes purposefully in the story-within-a-story--and imbuing them with charm and foundation. Except for Armie Hammer, who is on some "I'm a businessman. I have to make this important deal happen. Business." 51. Other People (Chris Kelly) In the first scene, a family has just watched life drift away from its matriarch. Stunned in the bed with her, they refuse to answer the ringing phone, thinking it might be undignified at such a profound moment. The solipsistic voicemail interrupts "I heard you were sick" with a Taco Bell order, and we see that Other People wants to look at a family's journey with cancer in a way that is off-center and irreverent. Most of it works in that regard, and there are some honest, smart moments that sell what feels like the writer/director Chris Kelly working out personal issues with a focus that is tart but not tormented. I especially liked the conversations between Jesse Plemons's David and his confidant Gabe. But Jesse Plemons is miscast in a way that seems to sink the movie. His greatest strength is his natural presence, which doesn't translate to a character uncomfortable in his own skin. Before realizing that Plemons was playing a gay man, I asked, "Is he doing 'gay stuff'?" because of his fidgets and squints. Maybe not a good sign in 2016 if the actor has to sell you, believing that gay people look and act a certain way. For every relationship that feels real, like the one between David and his on-again, off-again boyfriend, there's one that seems contrived, like the one with his father. I suspect there are just too many relationships in general for a film of this length to serve, but that's a better problem than not having enough to develop.

50. Popstar: Never Stop Never Stopping (Akiva Schaffer, Jorma Taccone) The obvious point first: The Conner4Real character is supposed to be a star with beloved music who falls from grace because he starts making terrible music. But all of the movie's music is kind of good and funny because it has to be, and there definitely doesn't seem to be a difference in quality from when the music was "good" versus when it is supposed to be "bad." That's a point that you just have to get past. That's the most uneven aspect of the film--and, yes, it's a dumb critique--because most other elements work well. A character with as little self awareness as Conner is difficult to write, but Samberg sells him with rare charm. His nervous, "there must be a mistake" smile as he's reading reviews won me over. Conner manages to be a totally specific kind of musician (and the screenplay understands the fickle nature of modern fame) without taking aim at one specific person. The Hunter character is obviously Tyler, the Creator, but Conner is kind of Bieber, kind of Timberlake, kind of Nick Jonas, even a little Robbie Williams. He's a type but still unique. Especially near the end, you kind of get the sense that The Lonely Island guys are shooting fish in a barrel, but this is an outrageous, endearing film. If I wrote any more, I would just be ranking my favorite jokes and spoiling them. 49. Fences (Denzel Washington) Another perfect example of the stage and the screen not being the same thing. Fences is one of the greatest plays of the 20th century, but there is no denying the theatricality of the piece. August Wilson shows his work: In a way that cinema doesn't really forgive, he spells out connections between stadium fences and backyard fences and chain-link fences and the more figurative fences that guard human emotion and the even more figurative fences that keep racism alive. I don't care that Washington keeps 90% of action in one location instead of opening it up. That's usually what people mean by "stage-y," but this is something else. It's an artifice of storytelling that does not translate when projected across a fifty-foot screen. Some things just work better in a play. And by that I mean, "metal plate brother metal plate brother metal plate brother metal plate brother." Luckily, the emotion is not artificial. Washington probably has more lines of dialogue in the first twenty minutes than he had in his previous four films, and it's just a pleasure to hear the music of the guy's voice. There's an important speech about how Troy fills the rooms that he's in, and Washington fills the screen similarly in a performance that is free of vanity yet full of pride. Stephen Henderson, a great That Guy, gets the juiciest role of his life as Bono, a man just as trapped by friendship as Troy is trapped by his past. 48. The Purge: Election Year (James DeMonaco) These movies continue to be low-key great. There's enough mythology now that the film can play with elements on the margins like murder tourism or Purge Night insurance hikes. DeMonaco and his DP Jacques Jouffret use so much direct light that it's distracting, but it sometimes results in demented imagery that can't be replicated.The movie's political subtext is simultaneously obvious and undeveloped, but it's notable that these movies, like the best grindhouse flicks, are made for the working class and minorities. There are entire characters who are there to be the voice of the raucous, untamed audience, there to feast on ultraviolence in the same way that the characters are. I normally would have been upset about the seven-year-old playing with an iPhone when he wasn't watching people be decapitated, but, for once, that's the perfect companion for this movie.