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gaylordscooter · 8 months ago

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Say Goodbye to Your Name

Ever since the twins fought, the guardian of negativity made it his goal to ruin the balance. He didn't care which way it went at first, but he was feeling awfully sluggish recently as it tipped in favor of positivity.

His brother was giving it his all to make everyone happy. Everyone but him.

He was always like that.

Figures that they would be programmed to feel the need to keep the balance, but he had a thought: if he powered himself using only a few people, how would that affect the balance?

He's noticed how proximity affects their energy. Being physically near someone who’s feeling happy or sad affects him more than the infinite multiverse does. He presumed proximity gives them easier access, therefore more energy.

Still, one person wouldn't be enough to fulfill the quota. Besides, one person could only give so much negativity before running out, and it would be hard to give them a break without companionship. Maybe if he got multiple that disliked each other he wouldn't even need to do anything.

Three sounded like a good number. It was odd and meant they couldn't split up into pairs. Pairs would be annoying to keep track of. He would want them all to stick together when he puts them through…

Put them through what? Torture? Torment?

Nightmares.

Now that was a nice word. He remembered his brother explaining to him what those were after helping people get over a particularly bad one.

He didn't know that he was the one that caused them.

It wasn't out of malice, he was keeping the balance like he wanted him to. Like the multiverse wanted him to.

Besides, without a nightmare every once in a while, they wouldn't be able to fully appreciate good dreams.

But of course, even when he was doing his job, he was doing something wrong.

As for which people to power himself with…He already had a vague idea.

There were three prominent sources of negativity coming from different universes. Not once have they faltered even with all of his brother’s meddling.

They’d need a place to stay. A big building where all of them can live. Perhaps a mansion or castle.

As for where it would be located, he already stayed in a pocket of the Antivoid which was far away from Error’s.

With a wave of the hand he created a forest and a castle. It was more of an illusion than an actual building, but when it felt and looked like a building, what difference did it make if it wasn't “real”?

And now for actually rounding them up.

Something New was the first universe he went to. He wasn't sure how the naming schemes of the universes worked, he assumed that the Ink guy was the one naming them all, maybe for categorizing.

The world was empty save for one lone skeleton.

He always hated the feeling of loneliness.

It didn’t take long for him to find him, with only one person in the universe he might as well have a target over his head.

He was, predictably, in his room at Snowdin, currently playing a game on his computer.

He was talking aloud, whether to himself or to someone, he wasn't sure but he bet on the former.

“sans, turn around there's some weird octopus thing behind you,” he read the text on his screen aloud. He chuckled and continued tapping away at his keyboard. “you’re not distracting me that easily.” He frowned as he scanned over the words on the screen. “chat, you’ve tried doing this before you're not gonna get me…” he trailed off as the guardian entered his peripheral vision. He choked out a nervous laugh, tearing off his LED cat-eared headphones as he swiveled his chair towards the being.

“Hello,” it said.

Was this some fun event no one’s ever documented before? No, there was something off about this code, it didn’t match with the rest of the game. The coding language wasn’t anything familiar.

Great, not even the anomaly was familiar with whatever this thing was.

“hey,” he greeted.

The creature scanned the room, its many tentacles flicked around the floor like they had brains of their own. He wasn’t sure where the thing’s cloak started and tentacles began, or maybe they were the same thing. Its singular cyan eye looked akin to a human’s eye flipped vertically. At first glance it looks pitch black, but the tar surrounding it has a slight blue-green tinge to it. Its hands, however, were bright cyan like its eye and looked skeletal.

“You’re all alone,” it said.

“yup.”

“Your world is of no use to you anymore,” it said.

“uh.”

Its head leaned closer with its eye piercing at his empty sockets. Some of the tar on its face melted away, revealing a sharp grin of cyan teeth.

Funnily enough, he couldn’t feel the presence of the anomaly right now.

He decided to place his elbow on the arm of his chair and leaned his head against his hand. He exaggeratedly moved his head up and down to show that he was looking it over.

“you’re kinda hot.”

As expected, the thing reeled back.

It looked to the side, hiding its mouth once more and clasping its hands together. All its tentacles curled against its body. Was it flustered?

A moment later it composed itself, moving its hands to its back and straightening its body to full height.

He had to move his head up to make eye contact.

“You can leave this world, if you come with me,” it offered.

“wait, actually?” He perked up, believing he heard wrong. Wait, what did “leave this world” mean? Like, die? Is this thing Death?

“I have a place for you to stay, in another universe. It’ll have all things vital for a mortal like you, shelter, food, water.”

Freedom from this hell? It was highly likely the anomaly wouldn’t be able to follow him. That sounded too good to be true.

He quirked a brow bone. “what’s the catch?”

“There will be two others living with you. You will not be able to return here. I will be feeding off your negativity.”

Well he didn’t mind those first two—What was that last one?

“huh?”

“Oh, and I forgot to mention,” its arm reached out. Suddenly, it held him up by the collar of his shirt. “You don’t have a choice.”

It tossed him backwards. His back hit the ground roughly, but the texture was all different. The ground was vaguely pointy. When he opened his eye sockets he realized he was lying down on grass.

The sky was blue. He could see the sky.

Was this the surface?

“No, this is not the surface,” the thing said as if it read his mind. Could it read his mind? “But you are not underground either.” A tentacle pointed towards a castle in the distance. “That is where you’ll be staying.”

The castle looked exactly like its owner, dark and imposing. It was like it had it custom made and gave the architects a picture of itself for reference.

He whistled, impressed.

“You’ll have to walk there yourself. I need to get the other two residents you’ll be staying with.” It opened a portal, so that’s how they got here, and stepped through before he could respond.

The next universe he went to was similar in concept to Something New, Dusttale. Like the other one, it was empty and it was easy to locate who he needed. Unlike the other one, he wasn’t sitting around in his room, but aimlessly wandering around the Snowdin forest.

Something was off, he thought. He would walk here everyday. This time he couldn't shake the feeling he was being watched.

YOU’VE LOST IT.

He lost it a long time ago, but he's never felt like this.

YOU CAN ALWAYS BREAK SHARDS INTO SMALLER PIECES.

True, but he was inclined to believe something was there. So of course he was on guard.

I WOULDN’T EXPECT YOU TO ACT RATIONALLY ANYWAY.

He stepped over a branch on the ground to avoid tripping. It was habitual, maybe he should move that branch to the side, or change his path, but he's never been good at change.

He was reaching the end of the forest.

Snap.

The branch broke.

He turned around, summoning two gaster blasters by his side and a wave of bones at the direction of the noise.

He heard the bones hit something. It made a squelch noise as if it pierced through viscous mud.

And then he saw what it hit.

YOU’VE LOST IT.

He was inclined to believe that.

“Rude, aren’t we?” Its voice caught him off guard. Really, hearing any voice other than his or Papyrus’s would've caught him off guard but on top of that, this one sounded otherworldly.

He refused to speak. The sound of his own voice reminded him too much of who he used to be, of what he lost.

The being melted into the ground. He almost thought he killed it, and then it rose up by his side a moment later.

“Quiet too,” it hummed in acknowledgment. “I’ll just get this over with, then.” It opened a portal next to them.

Before he could move away, one of its tentacles grabbed him by the shin.

“I am taking you to a different universe. There will be another person there and he is not as hardy as I am. Do not attack him.” It squeezed his shin tightly as a warning.

A different universe?

He was dragged through the portal. The thing didn't follow him, however. The sight of grass and a blue sky threw him for a loop and the other skeleton that looked like him did not help.

The third and last universe was much different than the other two, Horrortale. It was still populated, unlike the others. It was harder to locate who he needed, but again, he was in Snowdin. This time he was at one of his sentry stations.

The spike in his fear when he saw him gave him a rush.

“Hello there.”

The Sans immediately attacked like the one before. A row of sharpened bones burst out of the ground and impaled him, but much to his dismay, it didn't stop him at all from getting closer.

In fact, the bones impaling him were dissolved by the slime covering him.

“Your life here is so drab, isn't that right?”

“you gonna kill me?” he grumbled.

“Quite the contrary. I’m here to give you a new life. It's not like you'll miss the old one, anyway.”

His sockets widened in terror. There was sweat beading on his forehead as his hand scratched at the counter of his stand. “what the hell are you talking about? that's not—”

“—possible?” he cut him off, mimicking the other skeleton’s voice. He laughed, his voice gradually changing back to his own. “Don’t believe me? That's okay, it'll happen regardless.”

A portal opened behind the Sans.

“you can't. i can't just leave my friends—”

Another laugh cut him off. “Friends?! What friends? Oh, the people that you manipulated? Or the people who are the reason why you have that gaping hole in your skull?”

“how the fuck do you know about that?” he snarled.

“Your guilty conscience is so loud, it told me itself,” he sneered. “Come on, don't you want to leave this hell? You’ll have food—of good quality too. You won’t have to worry about going hungry ever again, and it won't be human meat. Doesn't that sound nice? Don't you miss eating?” To give him an example, he summoned a plate of freshly cooked steak on the counter.

Sans’s attention immediately snapped to the food in front of him. The smell was intoxicating. He couldn't help but drool. He could feel his metaphorical stomach screaming at him as his persistent hunger wrenched at his soul.

When's the last time he’s seen steak like this?

His body moved on his own. He lunged. He tore at the steak like a fucking animal. The second he swallowed the first bite, the logical part of his mind took over and he stopped as soon as he started.

“You have more willpower than I thought you did. Stopping yourself after having one bite? I expected you to down the whole thing.”

He gripped at the counter with both of his stained hands, cracking the wood beneath his phalanges. “i��m not some mindless animal,” he retorted.

“Yes, perhaps, but you're a moment away from becoming one. If I left and came back a few years later, would you even be able to hold a conversation with me?”

He didn't reply. He tapped on the counter, irritated.

“You don’t know.”

He gritted his teeth. His smile was strained and stained red.

“And that terrifies you.”

He was trembling.

The guardian shoved him into the portal before he could say anything.

The Sans landed on his back on the grass. The blue sky was as startling as it was to the other two.

Speaking of the other two, they were currently at each other's throats. Scorch marks from gaster blasters and broken pieces of bones littered the grass.

He looked down at the third one. “Welcome to your new home.”

He said nothing, as if he was in shock like a bird that crashed into a window.

Two of his tentacles lashed out to grab and lift the other two by their necks. He brought them closer to him. “I told you not to attack him,” he said to the hooded one.

The third one watched nervously, staying completely still as if moving meant joining those two up there.

The other one laughed, filling the hooded one’s silence. “what nice company we have here. sans one two and three.”

The guardian hummed at his comment. He put the skeletons down before they ran out of breath—could they even run out of breath? Perhaps not. “I will need to give you new names,” he concluded.

The one from Something New, scoffed, “nah, i’m not letting you name me. just call me…killer.”

“Killer,” he repeated. “How fitting.”

Killer shrugged, “if it works, it works.”

“new names. new names?!”

“now red-eye over there should be called crack-head.”

“very creative,” Crack-head deadpanned.

No, that was a dumb name.

“Horror,” he decided. He pointed at the hooded one, “Dust.”

Naming them off of their universes was basic, yes, but they didn't need a name with any thought put into it. In fact, it was better to put as little thought as possible into them.

“great, i’m yanked outta home, surrounded by alternate versions of myself, and now i’m being stripped of my identity. what’s next, you gonna torture us?” Horror complained.

The guardian smiled impossibly wide. “Funny you say that.”

Horror looked unimpressed.

“and what’s your name, huh?” Killer questioned, looking the guardian in the eye.

His name? He didn't recall having one. There was no one to give him a name, but as Killer demonstrated, one could name themself.

He decided to go with the most pleasing word to him.

“Refer to me—as Nightmare.”

“ok, edgelord,” Killer snickered.

He impaled Killer through the chest, narrowly missing his soul, with a sharpened tentacle.

He choked out and staggered, only being kept upright by the tendril impaling him.

The other two's wariness shot up.

Killer fully expected to die right there, but he had a fraction of HP left. It was a calculated hit. If he wanted him dead he would be.

“what the fuck?” he hissed out.

“That's not my name,” Nightmare growled.

“ok ok, sheesh, nightmare!” he shouted with desperation.

The tentacle withdrew. Killer couldn't suppress his scream in pain as he collapsed to his knees.

Horror had a clear grimace, while Dust’s expression was obscured by his hood.

Killer’s breathing was labored and sporadic.

“You can be as insufferable as you want to be, Killer. Just be prepared to live with the consequences,” he said coldly. “Let me make this clear for you all, your old lives are forfeit, your new home is here at the castle, I will provide you with all the necessities, and I will put you through horrible scenarios for my entertainment.”

If it wasn't for the fact he just impaled Killer mercilessly, that last sentence would make them laugh at the ridiculousness of it.

“The first scenario—starts right now.” He raised his arms up and lurid black fog overtook the area, obscuring their vision.

It didn't take long for the fog to do its job. He felt their misery rise in mere moments. The fog in question was a party trick of his; it allowed him to send people into a nightmare of their own making while awake.

He watched as the three struggled and fought against nothing. He could hear one of them arguing, saying something about his eye. The other two were completely silent, blindly throwing attacks at the fog.

He dispelled the fog once he got bored, which didn't take that long. The three passed out once the area was clear. He rolled his eye and opened portals beneath them to send them straight to their new rooms.

This would work, he thought. He already felt better, but he wanted to make this more fun. Using his fog was too cheap and would get old quickly. He’ll brainstorm ideas while they get accustomed to the place.

Horror awoke. He was in an unfamiliar room that was fancifully decorated. He was currently on a bed that seemed like it was worth more than his entire house.

Oh, and he also felt awful. He had a painful headache from whatever the fuck Nightmare did to them. In a way, this was like a personal hell for him. Was this the world’s way of making him repent for all he's done? He wasn't remotely a religious person, but at this point he didn't doubt it.

He caught sight of a slice of pie on the floor. It almost reminded him of one of Toriel’s. He knew better than to eat it, despite his nonexistent stomach’s complaints.

He took the risk of exploring, exiting the room cautiously.

He entered a long hallway. There were five doors in total, three along one of the walls and two at each end. It was relatively dark with the lack of windows. The dim blue flames from the candles along the wall were the only light source.

Killer was also in the hall, currently eating a slice of pie.

“are you crazy?!” Horror blurted, startling the skeleton.

“fuck man!” he jumped, “warn a guy before shouting.” He took another bite of the pie with no regards to if it was poisoned or wherever the hell it came from.

“you're just eating random food on the ground? who knows what it'll do.”

“bud, i was at low HP and saw a delicious slice of pie. of course i’m gonna eat it, poison be damned,” Killer replied without a care.

“you were at low HP because of the one supplying you the pie.”

“if he wanted me dead, i’d be dead. he’s givin’ me pie, i’m eating the pie it's simple.” He took another bite as if to support his point.

Horror muttered something Killer couldn't hear. He sighed, “where's the other guy?”

“you mean dust?” He quirked his head.

“you're not actually going to use the names he gave us, are you?” he questioned.

“well, what else? call us all sans and get all confused? or are you jealous i got to name myself while you're stuck with ‘horror’,” he said with his mouth full.

Horror scrunched his face in disgust. He already hated this guy. “as if ‘killer’ is a good name.”

“it's not a good name, it's a killer name,” he smirked.

“that sucked.”

Killer pouted and finished the last of his pie.

The door in between the two opened, and Dust stepped out.

“good morning sleeping beau—”

He shoved Killer against the wall using blue magic.

“woah!” Horror exclaimed and backed up.

The impact knocked the wind out of him. “ok, damn, bad morning, i guess.” Thankfully the plate in his hands was still intact.

“what's your problem?” Horror said.

Dust glared at Horror, his mismatched eyelights catching the other off guard.

Horror realized how high his LV was and realized why Nightmare named him Dust. He raised his hands in defense. “chill out, dude, we ain’t the enemy.”

Killer summoned a bone in his hand and tossed it at Dust, hitting him in the back of the skull. “yeah, dude, chill.”

Dust slammed him into the ground with a loud shatter before releasing the hold on his soul. He tucked his hands into his pockets and walked towards the end of the hall without a word.

Killer pushed himself up to his feet once Dust exited the hall. “that guy’s a dick.” He brushed the broken shards of the plate off his clothes.

In all honesty, Horror could see where Dust was coming from. Killer's proven to be nothing but annoying so far.

Killer looked down at the broken pieces of the plate on the floor. “it wasn't poisoned, by the way. so hah!” He looked in the direction of each end of the hall. “i’m gonna see if this place has a kitchen.” He decided to go to the door opposite of the one Dust went through.

Horror sighed and pinched the bridge of his nasal bone once he was alone in the hallway. There was a lot to process here, but Killer and Dust seemed unfazed by their new predicament. Weren't they going to miss their friends? Or at the very least, their brother?

He was trying his best to keep calm, or at least appear that way. He decided the best course of action now—was to go back to that room and eat that pie.

#utmv fic #the bad sanses #nightmare sans

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doubledutchratfucker · 1 year ago

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thinking about the Winged Boots in dnd 5e.

While you wear these boots, you have a flying speed equal to your walking speed. You can use the boots to fly for up to 4 hours, all at once or in several shorter flights, each one using a minimum of 1 minute from the duration. If you are flying when the duration expires, you descend at a rate of 30 feet per round until you land.

The boots regain 2 hours of flying capability for every 12 hours they aren't in use

what the hell is this game design? you have 4 hours of flying, and yet you count it off in minutes, meaning that if you want to accurately track your flying, you will need a counter on your character sheet that goes up to 240. but, for every 12 hours they aren't in use you get 120 'charges' back, so for all intents and purposes, as long as you aren't using them for long term overland travel and you take a long rest each night, you have a functionally infinite fly speed, making these boots more powerful than the flying speed you can get from being a 20th level wizard. this is an uncommon magical item.

additionally, the recharge mechanic isn't like anything else in 5e, it doesnt have charges (except it does, it just doesn't tell you that), and it doesn't regain those charges on any mechanical trigger except not being used for a while. this wouldn't be an issue if it wasn't pretty much the only item that did this, breaking 5e's unspoken design principle of magic items having X number of charges and regaining a dice roll's worth of charges every long rest (or, less often, dawn)

weird fuckin game design from, presumably, long before the designers figured out a unified voice for what 5e was.

#dnd #dnd 5e #dungeons and dragons

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inbarfink · 1 year ago

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You know, outside of all the obvious reasons why Simon’s Bad Crown Plan was Obviously Bad - there is one extra reason the series itself didn’t directly acknowledge. That is, while wearing the Magic Crown can grant any ol’ schmuck ice powers

It generally doesn’t seem to give them the Full Ice Wizard Transformation Treatment, with all the Madness and Sadness that comes with it

Unless the previous Wielder is dead.

So presumably, what Simon was trying to find wasn’t just any Magic Crown, it was a Magic Crown who wasn’t attuned to any other wearer and probably because the previous wearer is dead. But in the show it just never directly came up since the non-destroyed Crowns we’ve actually encountered were:

The Extinctworld Magic Crown, over whom the majority of the Drama actively revolves around - whose wielder was indeed long dead before Simon and Friends even got there.

The Vampireworld Magic Crown, where killing the wielder of the Crown was already kinda taken as granted as part of the plan for getting it.

And even when that plan got derailed and our trio was considering taking the Magic Crown and bailing - it was also explicitly stated that just knocking the thing off his head could’ve dispelled the clouds blotting out the sun and killed him anyways.

Then there’s the Winterworld Magic Crown, where despite Cake’s… eagerness

Simon and Fionna never make any attempts to get the Crown from the Winter King, but also this guy does also pretty much immediately says he's willing to help them in ways that don't involve taking his specific Crown.

And at the same time it is notable that as soon as he does die

Simon is pretty quick to try to loot his ‘corpse’.

So, really from the immediacy of his actions here, I feel like he is aware that needs a Magic Crown not immediately bound to a living person.

With the possibility of infinite crowns in infinite circumstances, I’m going to assume Simon’s plan was, if he found a Crown bound to someone’s below Vampire King’s level of ‘apocalyptic supervillain slowly killing the whole planet’ level of awfulness and also without Winter King's capacity and (supposed?) willingness to help - they’d just hope on to the next universe and try again.

And obviously I understand that, narratively speaking, for the sake of Simon’s character arc - Crown Quest kinda had to remain focused on Simon’s own self-sacrifice and the price he felt he had to pay for the sake of Fionnaworld. But… I do wonder, with how desperate the situation got in Episodes 7 and 8…and with Simon previously already seeing death as preferable to the curse of the Magic Crown…

... What would have happened if it seemed like the last chance to save Fionnaworld was a Crown bound to a living Ice King? Would Simon even consider upping the number of sacrifices needed to keep Fionnaworld eternal from one to two? Especially if he can rationalize it as the ‘Mercy Killing’ he never got? Or would the second his Purpose involve any sort of destruction that isn’t purely self-destruction is the point that this plan is off the hook?

#adventure time #atimers #fionna and cake #fionna & cake #at #fac #f&c #adventure time fionna and cake #adventure time simon #fionna and cake simon #fionna and cake show #fionna and cake series #simon petrikov #simon adventure time

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i-write-sin-not-tragedy · 30 days ago

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I am here to give a small rant because i keep seeing the same take/sentiment in this fandom on the topic of Charlie and Vaggie and how they treat Angel and its been bothering me so much the last few day i just. Need to rant.

I really REALLY hate the mischarazation of Charlie (but also Vaggie as well) and their relationship to Angel. Specifically, the number of people who completely ignore any and all context behind WHY they acted the way they did with him at first and the fact that it has canonly changed.

A lot of people go HARD on them being forceful, disregarding and uncaring towards his situation, and they completely ignore the story telling and context canon gives us about it.

Vaggie is dismissive and uncaring/frustrated with him because her first impressions of him are him not giving a fuck, insulting her, and making everything a joke.

Charlie sees good in him, but simply thinks hes being stubborn and shes aware enough to know forcing recovery *doesn't work*. She doesn't think hes taking it seriously because he TELLS HER. MULTIPLE TIMES that he doesn't.

Its not until episode 4 that EITHER of the girls get context for his situation.

He has been canonly hiding the fact that hes abused from them— shown when he hides his phone from Charlie and explains away Vals agressive texts, telling her "my boss is just stressed about the news".

This is a very blunt context clue that Charlie isn't aware of his situation. She knows what he does for work (and has no issues with it, she was genuinely excited to visit his work and see him working WHY do yall think shes a prude jfc) but she is never told about Val beyond what Angel tells her, and hes clearly hiding it from her.

(Which is extremely normal in abuse victims.)

Its VERY notable that their attitude towards him shifts after Masquerade.

Charlie is even MORE hard on her stance that he IS a good person, and defends *him specifically* to all of heaven and is ready to kill when Lute says its his own fault.

You can literally SEE the moment she connects the dots in masquerade about Angel and Val and the only thing that stops her from ripping him to shreds is Angel stepping in.

Vaggie is a lot softer with him, and doesn't snap nearly as much after that, presumably because when Charlie came home upset and sobbing, she told Vaggie *exactly* what was going on. And this is a situation that is more than likely a little close to home for Vaggie. (Even if Charlie doesn't know that yet

Ofc she does sometimes still get annoyed with Angel because he still teases her, but you can tell they both now have an infinitely better understanding of Angel as a person, and they both have CONTEXT for his attitude.

And in turn he also understands they're NOT like Val. They genuinely care and want to help, and hes slowly letting it in.

He accepts Charlies very real apology and acknowledges that she had the best intentions, and probably wouldn't have gone had he told her the full story.

Not to mention, Charlie spends most of "You Didn't Know" defending Angel specifically. Not the whole group, HIM. He is her plea. She wants him to be safe, to feel loved to have a better chance.

So to just. Reset them completely and say they wouldn't care/would basically victim blame Angel feels INSANE and it bothers me so SO much how often i see it in this fandom.

#hazbin hotel #angel dust hazbin hotel #charlie morningstar #vaggie hazbin hotel #hazbin: Charlie's Angels #like please yall #the girls have issues absolutely #being fucking victim blamers isn't one of them #you can fight me they care about him #shoutout to fanby for beta reading this #as in they let me scream at them in dms before coming here to post it lmfao

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thisisnotthenerd · 1 year ago

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ok, i know i put a poll up and that relationship tracking won the poll for what came next on the stats series.

but consider this: relationship tracking takes so goddamn long. i had already started it by the time that i put the poll up, and as of now i'm still not done. granted the list is comprehensive: romantic, platonic, familial, and adversarial relationships, separated by pc-npc and pc-pc. for every season.

anyway, i started tracking character ages in the meantime while i build up the motivation to finish the relationship tracking.

without further ado:

d20 character ages

some of these are listed in the wiki. some of these are based on vibes and more vague indications from the seasons in question. all of them have some element of my commentary. if there isn't an age given i will explain why. it's in the seating chart because that compacts the format into an understandable block and not an infinitely long list.

to be clear, some of these are confirmed with actual numbers, but some aren't, and i'm listing them as unknown and offering my opinion in place of a confirmed number.

fantasy high freshman year: i am convinced that the ages the cast give are vibes based. as someone who did not fit the normal age range of high school, i can tell you that in the US, freshmen are typically 14-15, sophomores 15-16, juniors 16-17, and seniors 17-18. that's not to say that someone can't fall out of those ranges. i did. anyway:

fig faeth: ~15. this is a rough estimate--she'd be born just after fall cutoff for her year to start at 15.

gorgug thistlespring: 14-15. he was confirmed 14 at the start of the season, and presumably turns 15 at some point during the year.

adaine abernant: 14-15. this is based on the fact that she turns 16 before the events of sophomore year

fabian seacaster: 16. a bit older than your average freshman, but i knew people who were 16 freshman year, so it's not that weird.

kristen applebees: 15-16. again a bit older than your average freshman, but younger than fabian.

riz gukgak: 14. this was confirmed in episode 13 iirc. riz is the youngest of the party

escape from the bloodkeep: this party has some major age differences that are very unclear. no real confirmed ages.

maggie: unknown. she and zaul'nazh had been in a relationship for ~100 years, so she's probably got a good couple of centuries under her belt

leiland: unknown. similar deal to maggie--he spent centuries serving zaul'nazh. how many? who knows

efink murderdeath: unknown. she's a tolkienesque high elf. if we go full lotr comparison to arwen, she's over 2000 by the time she marries percival.

sokhbarr: unknown. again, we don't really get confirmation of an age for him--he's just kind of an ageless bog-lord.

lilith: old as time. she ate the stars. definitely the oldest of the party.

markus st. vincent: unknown. human, so he has a human lifespan. i'd pin him in his 30s. given that his closest comparison is probably faramir, who's 35 at the start of the war of the ring, i think 30s tracks.

the unsleeping city: here we have a mix of confirmed ages and some straight up vibes.

ricky matsui: late 20s early 30s. more specifically around 26-31. this is vibes-based. i based this on his career progression.

sofia lee: early-mid 30s. another vibes-based one. again based on career progression. she feels a little older than ricky and pete, but not by much. married to dale for 5 years, so if they got married when she was in her late 20s, this tracks.

kingston brown: 55. thank god a confirmed number.

misty moore: ~400. at least that's how long she's been on earth. this actually comes from tucii. i'd put her misty form in late 70s early 80s, and her rowan form in her mid 20s.

kugrash: ~60, based on his 30 years as a rat druid.

pete conlan: younger than 31. this is based on a reference ally makes in tucii to big business (1988), so i aged him back three years. i would guess mid-late 20s during tuc; he mentions not having seen his dad in 6 years. assuming pete fully transitioned during college/around college age, it would make sense for him to be around 25-28 during the first unsleeping city.

tiny heist: some of these characters just straight up don't age, so they don't really count when evaluating age.

rick diggins: unknown. he's a clicko man. he cannot age except in spirit.

boomer coleoptera: unknown. vaguely middle-aged, though that might just be clint mcelroy's general dad energy

agnes: elderly. no confirmed number, though she's old enough to have a grandma schtick, a reputation, and a terminal illness prognosis of 2 months

ti-83: a teen. and that's all we know. probably younger than bean.

bean: late teens early 20s. a vague range, but at least it's something.

car-go jones: another ageless toy. at least a decade in human years, if we estimate that max got him at a similar age that he gives him to dylan.

a crown of candy: finally some goddamn numbers.

liam wilhelmina: 17-18. he starts at 17 and turns 18 in ep 15 iirc.

theobald gumbar: ~50. this tracks for him assisting lazuli and being amethar's friend during the war

jet rocks: 18. and she never lived past 18.

saccharina frostwhip: 23-24. this tracks for her being born around the ravening war, before the rocks sisters were killed.

ruby rocks: 18. and she keeps living.

amethar rocks: 48. reasonable. he'd have been in his mid 20s during the ravening war.

lapin cadbury: old man. yes that is the actual entry. i'd say he's probably 10-15 years older than amethar to really be considered old.

cumulous rocks: late 30s early 40s. tracks for being created by lazuli while theo was starting his knighthood under her.

fantasy high sophomore year: i'm halfway convinced that the intrepid heroes just don't know how old high schoolers are. granted, they may be going for general teen, i.e. 13+1d6, so the more batshit stuff they do comes across as a little more normal. it's like having actors in their 20s play teens. except they're actually dnd characters. and they're in their 30s.

fig faeth: 16-17. another rough estimate for fig.

gorgug thistlespring: 17. a little funky, since he was 14 at the start of fhfy. the principle of 13+1d6 comes across here

adaine abernant: 16. her age range for the year is 15-16, which is normal for a high school sophomore.

fabian seacaster: 18. definitely stretching it a bit. the listed current age is 18-19, which i'm assuming is using boy's night as reference.

kristen applebees: 16-17, which tracks with her progression from freshman year

riz gukgak: 16. confirmed in ep 14 iirc. since he was 14 in feb of freshman year, and assuming spring break is ~april, he has a spring birthday.

pirates of leviathan: there's a pretty clear split of age groups in this season--the first to introduce adults in spyre.

sunny biscotto: 18. her first adventure as an independent person, even though it was technically her running away from home.

barbarella sarsaparilla gainglynn: 22. it tracks; she grew up isolated on leviathan and isn't super far into her career, though she has a pretty strong base

cheese stormcrank: 16. the youngest of the party, even though he's his family breadwinner. the left table is the young people in this party.

myrtle: 30. aabria calls her a 'dirty thirty'. so that may not be exact.

jack brakkow: late 50s equivalent. granted he's a ratkin, and middle age starts at 25 for them, with old landing at 40. so he may actually be younger, probably closer to myrtle's age if not a little older.

marcid the typhoon: unknown. he's never given a specific age. given that he's known myrtle for a long time, and at some point was nearly drowned in a shipwreck, i'm going to put him in his 30s as well.

the unsleeping city chapter ii: again, a mix of confirmed ages and vibes.

ricky matsui: early 30s. 29-34. this is just three years aged up from the first unsleeping city.

sofia lee: mid 30s. another age-up from

kingston brown: 58. thank god a confirmed number.

iga lisowski: 45. it feels like she kind of plays up the old lady schtick for her job, bc 45 isn't that old.

rowan berry: ~400. at least that's how long she's been on earth. rowan form in her mid 20s.

cody walsh: 26. this is a 26 year old hot topic manager with 12 swords and extreme mediocrity. truly a character designed to cause chaos.

pete conlan: younger than 34. again based on the reference ally makes in tucii to big business (1988). i'd put him at around 28-31. definitely around cody's age, a little older, but not much.

mice & murder: they are animals using variant human stats, so they're using human ages.

gangie green: 55. he definitely acts younger in certain circumstances.

buckster $ boyd: unknown. probably younger than gangie--late 40s perhaps? we know he's a gemini.

daisy d'umpstaire: almost 60. she's past her prime and wondering if she really wants to do this for the rest of her life

ian prescott: unknown. definitely middle aged, probably around buckster's age.

lars vandenchomp: 18, supposedly in dog years. also a cancer. i don't know how, given that they served in the schnauzer war and supposedly have a business degree.

sylvester cross: 55. another person past his prime, and wondering what's he's doing with the rest of his life.

misfits & magic: the first school season to actually have consistent ages, assuming they're entering as sixth years who were in their junior year in the us.

whitney jammer: 16. born around 2005.

k | dream: 17. born around 2004

sam black: 16. another 2005 baby

evan kelmp: 17. born around 2003. this tracks for him not having formal education-- a little old for the grade.

the seven: the first spyre school season to have the ages be consistent. the ladies know teenagerhood well.

the fact they lost a year or so in the palimpsests makes placing their grades a little fuzzier: we know sam, ostentatia, and zelda get taken during the school year. penny goes missing just before the start of the year, and antiope, katja, and danielle get taken beforehand.

antiope jones: 18. she lost a year in the palimpsest, so she's technically a super senior, making her a junior during fhfy.

katja cleaver: 18. another technical super senior, who was a junior during fhfy.

penny luckstone: 18. again, she lost her junior year during fhfy.

danielle barkstock: 16-17. i'd say 17, because that makes her a sophomore during fhfy--she'd have repeated the year to be a junior during the seven.

ostentatia wallace: 16-17. leaning toward 17 again, but younger than danielle. we don't get full confirmation of how old she is/what grade she's in during fhfy, but given the fact that she's established enough to host a party at her house during fhfy, i'd say she's a sophomore, and that's the year she repeats.

sam nightingale: 18. i'd say close to 19, because she's definitely in penelope's age group if not grade, and i'm pretty sure i recall penelope being a senior during fhfy. she may have been young for her grade initially, but came out on the other end after fhfy.

zelda donovan: 16-17. leaning towards 16 for zelda; she's a freshman with the bad kids during fhfy, and is the last maiden to be captured, at some point during the second semester. she could conceivably retake classes over the summer and catch up in order to be a sophomore the same year as the bad kids.

shriek week: this is a college season, so they're college aged. i don't have that much to say--we know exactly how old they are.

terry talbo: 22

megan mirror: 23

tuti iv: 21

seven: 22

a starstruck odyssey: there's a mix here--some vagueness, some numbers. in-universe their ages would be counted differently anyway, since they work off of 6-month cycles and not 12-month years.

gunnie miggles-rashbax: mid 30s. he's got two PhDs and a master's as well as a cyborg body and years of trying to pay off debt.

riva: unknown. it's reasonable to assume that they're on the younger side, given that they are on their galavant. i'd assume around early-mid 20s for their species.

norman takamori: unknown. based on the art and his general timeline, i'd say ~40s. maybe 50s.

skip | valdrinor: unknown. he's a cerebroslug who was presumably raised somewhere, tried to escape, ended up in space and then in a crate of powdered egg substitute.

margaret encino: 24. a savant who began working at 18. truly a girlboss on a quarter life crisis.

sundry sidney: n/a. she's an android--aging doesn't really apply to her. i think it's only been a year or so since the line was shut down, since it's been revamped as the warfare whitneys.

big barry syx: 38. this also carries over to barry nyne. we know barry bohunk created the barry battalion before anarchera 200 (current=220), but they were born as 25 year old beautiful big boys. in short, barry's age is a little questionable.

coffin run: another age split season, since half of the party is immortal.

aleksandr astrovsky: 41. young to be florina's zayde. also 15 sons? especially when he and marina had not been in contact for ~7 years? insane.

squing: old as time. younger than dracula, but only just. just a squishy headed vampire who eats letters.

wetzel: 26. has not even lived a majority of his lifetime and already wants to be a vampire.

may wong: 24. granted that's because she was turned at 24 so as to be eternally young and hot, so she's a bit older than that probably.

a court of fey and flowers: they are archfey that don't die. blooms are centuries apart. assume these age ranges are going to be like the bloodkeep ranges.

andhera: unknown. younger than most of the fae--he's the current heir to the unseelie, but has had many siblings who died previously in pursuit of the throne. most of the others knew them when they were younger; hob unhorsing him on the field of battle is only one example. so definitely like just of age for this prince.

k.p. hob: unknown. definitely older than andhera and likely binx, he's in the prime of his military career. getting closer to middle age, but still a relatively eligible bachelor, given that the goblin court sought to make a marriage alliance with lady sylmenar.

chirp featherfowl: unknown. i'd put her at the archfey equivalent of late 20s early 30s just based on vibes. she's still getting down at the bloom but has a 4 year old at home on the material plane.

squak airavis: unknown. i'd say slightly younger than chirp, but they've been cousins for so long that the difference is irrelevant. late 20s, getting down and breaking hearts at the bloom. considering marriage but shopping around.

delloso de la rue: unknown. rue is a little tricky--they were brought to the court of wonder as a child and presumably aged normally to that point, but they've been an archfey ever since. closer to hob's age than the lords of the wing.

binx choppley: unknown. the crisis of the court of craft happened relatively recently in fey terms and she was an adult by that point, though not truly the leader at the time. i'd say she's older than andhera, younger than the lords of the wing.

neverafter: some weird age splits in this party; kids, adults, inexplicable trickster spirits.

rosamund du prix: 18. technically 118, but that doesn't really matter.

timothy goose: unknown. he's old enough to have greying hair and an adult son--late 40s-early 50s maybe?

pinocchio: 12. this is based on both him and ylfa being 21 during the epilogue, so i'm assuming they're the same/a similar age.

puss in boots/pib: unknown. we meet him when he's on the older side for a cat, but also he's an eternally reincarnating trickster spirit, so that doesn't really matter.

gerard of greenleigh: 32. the other adult in the party, even though he doesn't have everything figured out.

ylfa snorgelsson: 12. this is confirmed in story, and she and pinocchio are the same age.

the ravening war: this season is a little weird because of the time skip and the fact that some ages are unconfirmed.

delissandro katzon: starts at 19, 21 after the first timeskip, 26 after the second. a young man.

raphaniel charlock: unknown. i'd say he starts in his late 60s and ends the season in his mid-70s. old enough to be deteriorating and have specific signs of age, but still spry enough to pull off a cunning action dash.

karna solara: 14 to start, 16 post-timeskip 1, 21 post-timeskip 2. rotting from a young age.

colin provolone: unknown. i'd place him in his late 20s to start, mid 30s by the end, based on his art and the start of cheese pattern baldness.

amangeaux epiceé du peche: unknown. mid 20s to start, early 30s by the end. she and her husband had been trying for heirs for a while--assuming she married young, she's not past her prime, but not having a kid in her position would be a little sus. also the fact that she must have had a relatively healthy uncomplicated pregnancy points to her still being pretty young to start.

dungeons & drag queens: a lot of variance here as well. mostly vibes-based.

troyánn: 242. she's got a combination of elf and immortal mermaid queen--this is reasonable.

princess foehammer: unknown. probably in her 20-30s.

gertrude: unknown. explicitly immortal--the only sign of age is her hair. she's been around for a while.

twyla: unknown. she's another fairy of unknown age.

mentopolis: some of these characters have stated ages. they are also concepts in a brain.

conrad schintz: 10. his growth has been stunted for years.

anastasia tension: 24. an up and coming journalist running form her rich family? say no more.

hunch curio: unknown. he's a concept in a brain. on vibes? 40s.

imelda pulse: unknown. i'd say she's probably around anastasia's age, given that they demonstrably grew up together.

dan fucks: unknown. another concept in a brain. 20-30s on the vibes alone.

the fix: unknown. concept in a brain. old enough to be a father and a contract killer is all i'll say.

burrow's end: this follows stoat aging--some of these are confirmed, some are guesses.

tula: 1-2 years old, leaning towards 2. old enough to have kids of a reasonable age, if the 1 year mark is adulthood (male stoats achieve sexual maturity at 10-11 months)

jaysohn: somewhere between 6 and 8 months old. growing up fast.

viola: 1-2 years old, same litter as tula. i looked up stoat reproduction against recommendation.

thorn vale: 1-2 years old. in the vague adult range with tula and viola.

ava: 4 years old. potentially could live for 15 more winters. unbelievable.

lila: somewhere between 6 and 8 months old. same litter as jaysohn, but is the elder of the two of them.

and that's all for this time! despite being this long, this is still going to be shorter than the relationship tracking. as always the spreadsheet is available for perusal.

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lovelyrotter · 11 months ago

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okay but i actually kinda wanna know ur take on stridercest being canon compliant O_O <- autism stare

oh hey i am also hitting you with the autism stare. ill try to get my thoughts down in a way that makes sense to more than just me hahaha

bear in mind that im an epilogue lover and i think Meat/Candy are really valuable pieces that further all of the characters and are also hard canon in the sense that we're looking at just 2 post-game universe outcomes out of an uncountable number (the book in the picnic basket representing post-canon fanfic). i think the characters actions in the epilogues make sense and are satisfying to me. yes even jane (i love alpha jane and i will not do her the disservice of 'cleaning her up' w/o showing her work for it. thats not how you depict a character who grew up with fascist programming). i could totally go on a whole tangent about this specifically but thats another post lol we'd be here forever and its also not stridercest

but okay. canon stridercest. under the cut cause it got kinda long

basically it has to do with the cherubs and how their relationships and mating rituals are pretty obviously incestuous leaning even though cherubs dont have the human concept of Siblings or blood family. the cherub who predominates will search across paradox space to mate with another cherub who closely resembles the cherub they predominated which is like textbook Freudian sexuality. theres a lot of Freud and Jungian stuff in HS imo even if im kinda [wobbly hand gesture] at the validity of these theories applied to real life and real people. but theyre super fun tools and lenses to use in fiction and i mean. gestures at all of dave

so the incest aliens cherubs. the whole reason why im talkin about them is bc Caliborn is so incredibly interested and invested in the Striders in particular. caliborn as both Lord English and Lil Cal shapes earth NOT OVERTLY but more so embeds himself in earth society, but again, the Striders lives in particular. dave is full of incest jokes. hes even apparently got a list of his friends arranged in order of how likely theyd incest-elope with each other (thank you epilogues for this amazing factoid). he seems to think about it often enough to, yknow, Do That. have a good solid think about that and construct an organized list about it. bearing in mind dave makes jokes about stuff thats a) bothering him, or b) generally camping out in his brain. hes not even really aware of it most of the time (as we see in one of the openbounds where hes all 'why am i thinking about puppets???' after seeing dirk for the first time in that dream bubble. he is thinking nonstop about dirk at that point and going off his only frame of reference for ANY dirk, which is his bro. his bro who was most likely deeply warped by Lil Cal)

sorry for the long blocky paragraph lol. but now onto the next thing

Caliborn as Lil Cal is the centerpiece in the beta strider apartment. dave cant escape him and beta dirk grew up with him. what the fuck do you do when youre childhood comfort item is also the most evil creature across all of paradox space? if youre a dirk you try to fight it. but how long can you keep fighting something like that. its safe to say that bro was affected by Caliborns particular brand of perversion and sfw kink. i dont think i have to say how insidious abusive and toxic he is about those things. and looking at the truth of beta bro (16yo alpha dirk) you can start to see just how warped beta bro became. beta bro is a false dirk (still a very Real dirk but not the Truth of dirk. beta bro has been toxified and made infinitely worse by an absolute evil influence over decades of life. in 80s fuckin texas. presumably in the system. anyone would be fucked up after that)

so for this analysis/theory im stating beta bro as a false persona. using jungian terms he is apha dirk's shadow

both dave and dirk live with a fake, carefully manicured version of their bros. they live with personas (or shadows of their guardians on the walls. hello platos allegory of the cave). they dont actually know e/o and they dont until the striunion

alpha dirk especially grows up embedded in the Public Persona Of Dave Strider 400 years post mortem and completely alone with unlimited internet access. hes a self admitted expert on his bro and we dont get to see a lot if any of his early childhood but i can hazard a guess at how much he clung to that persona of his bro. he fuckin idolizes dave. he LOVES dave. right off the bat he is in some kind of love with dave and i think if you try to argue against that then thats you slippin. i think youre a fool and have to reread homestuck because i wholeheartedly believe the striders loving eachother is part of the win state

once again this is speculation cause we get barely anything about alpha dave, but from what we already know about him im guessing this bro-persona is

achingly effortlessly cool

oozing masculinity (toxic or not, not really interested in categorizing that although toxic coolboy masculinity IS something the striders contend with & is an important facet in their lives)

a skilled fighter

a dedicated moviegoer (hes a director need i say more. this one is probably the only genuine thing about his on-screen persona)

and now lets look at jake. someone whos grown up on pretty much nothing but movies, whos doubtlessly been influenced by hollywood and its idea of gritty 'main character' masculinity through that, and who also clings to more old-school ideas of manliness (think victorian/edwardian era gentlemanly-but-loves-a-good-scrum kinda manly. moustache twirly with a monocle kinda manly. basically everything that grandpa harley is)

but okay lets look at what jake wants to be. lets take a look at his teenager persona

achingly effortlessly cool (his own 'hollywood star' kind of cool also def influenced by his favourite characters like lara croft who is indeed achingly cool. you see him succeed in inhabiting this hollywood star persona on earth c)

oozing masculinity (the old school manly mans-man kind)

a skilled fighter (two pistoles always. harder to aim cause you cant use a free hand to make up for kickback. that takes skill)

a dedicated moviegoer (again one of the only genuine parts about his persona. his questionable-to-wretched tastes aside. but bearing in mind that the SBaHJ movies are intentionally bad which is what makes them loop around to good. such is the nature of intentionally 'bad' art. jake fuckin lives in this perpetual bad-good art loop. okay enough with the art tangent keep focused man cmon)

because dirk has obviously way more contact with jake i dont doubt he sees through jakes own (admittedly way more flimsy) coolboy persona but the point still stands i think. different flavours but the same kinda guy. dirk has a type and i dont think its a stretch to say that hes looking for aspects of the bro-persona he grew up looking at in other boys, much like the winning cherub looking for the one they lost in the cherub theyll mate with

also wtf is with dirks obvious boner for dave chasing him across paradox space to decapitate him huh?? the last few sentences in Meat are about that very thing. he wants to fuc fight dave sooo bad. haha remember how the cherubic mating ritual is one of the most violent and long running spectacles in paradox space? i sure do

#stridercest #davedirk #dirkdave #alphacest #my t #thank you if you read all this HAHAHA #i am dedicated to my craft (autistic) (indulgent)

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autisticlalna · 3 months ago

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okay ive managed to get some sleep, let's try and explain this in a way that makes sense outside of my brain

so Viking and Ruby both have like. extensive multiverse going on. and all of how it functions is established in a different series, but is still relevant to Skyblock Kingdoms because of whatever the beans Cherruby is up to.

the most basic gist is: they have shared lore where Viking is the manifestation of space and Ruby is the manifestation of time, although i guess only when they're in the same world together? there's also an infinite number of Vikings and Rubys throughout the multiverse, and we have this info because of a version of Viking that has space powers and a version of Ruby that has time powers on Twitch SMP. this is also all connected to the clock and compass that Ruby has on Skyblock Kingdoms, so that's why this is getting upgraded to "oh god this is relevant and i need to explain it" rather than me going "HEY THIS IS WHY I CALL THEM SPACETIME SIBLINGS BTW :D"

for the more complicated explanation, I HAVE DRAWN SOME DIAGRAMS.

behold: a basic Rubyco and a basic VikingPilot. they're siblings! they're also universal constants, seeing as you can't have a functioning world without time and space and these two dinguses represent those foundational aspects. we have no idea how this happened, and 99% of them dont know either, or even know what their roles are. they're just hanging out.

also, like, if one or both of them permadies, stuff presumably explodes. so far this hasn't been like, relevant, but it's been brought up so i should probably include that tidbit somewhere.

along with Ruby and Viking, there's also the Clock and Compass-- the Clock belongs to Ruby, and the Compass belongs to Viking. if neither of them are in a universe together, then the Clock and Compass show up as separate entities. (also they're labeled Tempus and Locus in galactic when we saw them in Twitch SMP, but there was also a bit where the fandom was nicknaming a Ruby and a Viking Tempus and Locus so it gets a bit confusing.)

however, if one of them is missing-- like, say, there's only Ruby and there was never a Viking in that universe-- then the other sibling gets demoted from "load-bearing pillar of the universe" to "normal guy" and the job of stabilizing space and time is instead done by the Clock and Compass, just like if they were both gone. i think.

for any situation where it's only Viking or only Ruby you can disregard this chunk of their lore as "not relevant" - they're a pair, do not separate. this was also the part i was confused on before, and to be honest im still not sure if im getting it right because the phrasing was vaguer than i remembered. we'll see what happens when i start transcribing tsmp lore again.

ANYWAY. we know this because of these dorks:

...specifically the bottom two, but tRuby and tViking are also important here.

Sapphire and Navigator are... sort of a matching pair? Navigator's a mess, let's pretend he's paired with Sapphire. (Sapphire's actual counterpart Viking is missing in action.) they're also the only two we know of so far that a) know about their roles and b) have the powers to prove it.

Sapphire can reset the timeline at-will (mainly to bring tRuby back to life, but has also used this to drag Navigator back when he swapped out), and has knowledge of past and future. Navigator can swap himself and other people between universes, and has knowledge of things going on in other universes involving his counterparts. Sapphire can't leave the universe he's trapped in, and Navigator is bad at anything involving time.

however, neither of them are native to the Twitch SMP universe! we don't know where they're from, but Sapphire got put there as gay baby jail and Navigator pops in to check in on her. tRuby and tViking are also not native to that universe; they were originally from TwitchCon SMP, but Nav felt bad that they're from a short-lived world and transplanted them into TSMP. they're also the only other matching set we know of besides Nav and Sapph, which might be why tRuby is able to remember past timelines and why tViking is aware of things other Vikings have done. also removing them from their home universe was probably a bad idea for that universe's continued survival but it was literally about to end anyways, so,

Nav and Sapph also can't manifest a body outside of their home universe (???), so for gay baby jail to work there needed to be a Ruby for him to possess and, uh, there kinda wasn't one in TSMP. before Nav's intervention, there was the Clock and Compass keeping things stable. (probably a good thing, because tRuby dies a lot and tViking exploded. he got better.)

but out of the Vikings and Rubys we've seen so far, Nav and Sapph are kinda the outliers in category of "actually knowing about and being able to do stuff with their powers". god wait shit fuck this raises even more questions about Navigator but im not going to get into that right now. ANYWAY

so now we've got a mismatched pair! Cherruby isn't from SBK, but we don't know how it got here or what the world it left behind was like. there's a possibility that Cherruby has a corresponding Viking back home (bc she did mention missing family), but there's also moments pointing towards her being solo. also somehow they found the Clock and Compass and has been holding onto them, and they're under observation for reasons probably related to that.

Summertime, meanwhile, presumably has No Fucking Idea. without there being a Ruby native to SBK*, he's been demoted to Normal Guy status and therefore doesn't have to deal with any of this. maybe. it's, uh, getting kinda fuzzier now that the whole "had a flashback to Dominion" thing happened. god i have no idea what's going on with him

(* Cloneby got brought up, but i don't think ze qualifies considering ze was created partway through. and also i don't know if Avid can, like, do that. especially with Cloneby being an imperfect replica, and cc!Ruby drawing attention to the fact that Cloneby doesn't have the clock despite it being part of Cherruby's design.)

you can now see why i decided to include drawings bc otherwise this is an absolute brick of text. TWITCH SMP IS A SERIES WHERE SO MUCH HAPPENS IN IT.

#leo.txt #leo.png #vikingpilot #rubyco #tsmp #skyblock kingdoms #sbk #ABSOLUTE WALL OF TEXT (AND PICTURES) UNDER THE CUT. GOOD LORD #i dont know what im doing. godspeed everybody.#meta analysis stuff

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max1461 · 7 months ago

Text

Most real numbers are not arithmetically definable. This means, more or less, that there is no statement in the first-order language of arithmetic which is capable of uniquely identifying such a number. There are a countable number of arithmetically definable reals and an uncountable number of reals overall. A number is analytical if it is definable by a formula in the second-order language of arithmetic. Again, almost all reals are not analytical, because there are only a countable number of second-order arithmetic formulas. Likewise, most real numbers are not definable in the language of ZFC.

Humans and human minds are finite (or finitistic) things; presumably most real numbers are not "humanly definable", or perhaps even "physically definable". It may be the case that most real numbers cannot be individually picked out, named, or specifically described in any way given the constraints of the physical world. This does not mean that nothing can be said about them: we can still confidently conclude that an undefinable number greater than 6 is also greater than 3. Roughly, they can only be spoken about in generalities, with statements that apply to infinitely many of them at once. It is impossibly to even conceptualize any one of them specifically.

I am puzzling over two things right now:

Are there truths which are true of individual undefinable reals? These truths could never be stated or even thought, and almost by definition they could not have any bearing on the real world, but are they "there"? It seems like there should be unique truths about undefinable reals; for any undefinable real r, surely x=r (free in x) is uniquely true for r. But maybe this is a cheat, maybe there is no well-defined predicate "x=r" for undefinable real r. If you do believe there is such a predicate, I am tempted to ask: what does it mean? Of course by definition no answer can even in principle be formulated.

Do undefinable reals even have independent existence? I mean, in set theory they arguably don't: for undefinable real r and s, the statement "r ≠ s" does not correspond to any valid sentence in the language of ZFC. We know "from the outside" that they are distinct, but... do we? We can say tautologically "distinct undefinable reals are distinct", but surely general truths should in some way just be families of specific truths. Like "all dogs are smaller than the moon" is true because each dog individually is smaller than the moon. But we cannot individually say that any two undefinable reals are different from each other, or in fact individually say anything about them.

All this assumes that the universe, or at least human experience, is in some sense "finitistic" and therefore that most reals are in fact undefinable to us.

#navel gazing

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falloutcoys · 1 year ago

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I had a realization and I'm probably late to the party but. I think Ty's bureaucratic evil is sort of, a projection? A way of coping? I don't know the word I'm looking for but hear me out.

He always frames things with the Mikes as a deal, almost a contract. Despite it being very obviously one sided and them being made under duress. And there is no expiration. A Mike agreed to assist once under duress and now an infinite number are held to that for the foreseeable future.

How different is that from Ty's situation? A single Ty presumably joined the Compound once. Now every Ty is bound to this agreement. He can't leave. When he was let go, they expected him to line up peacefully in front of the death chamber. There is no getting out for Ty Betteridge. If he let himself admit how fucked up that was, would he be able to keep going? He'd just be eliminated and replaced if he couldn't.

So, it has to be fair. It has to be how things work for Mike, because it's how it works for him.

(For extra credit, compare this to the OVER Mike and Mustardseed situation. Weren't Mikey and Edgar doing the same thing to them?)

#OBVIOUSLY there is more because like #they do torture the mikes #and im not excusing that but i think this is an interesting lens to view Ty from #woe.begone #w.bg #wbg #ty betteridge #my posts

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copperbadge · 1 year ago

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Okay but can the royal family be called to serve jury duty?

We were talking about this in comments briefly! I've been thinking about it since.

I think the discussion is predicated on the idea that Askazer-Shivadlakia even has trial by jury. France apparently only has jury trial for felony level crimes, while Italy doesn't use juries at all (they have a council of judges). Askazer-Shivadlakia has a number of cultures tugging on it, but given they speak English due to an occupation, probably they have a jury trial format of some kind. Perhaps with only five or nine jurors (Italian Judges Style) instead of twelve. In any case, let's assume they do.

Alanna and Jerry aren't elected or immediate family, they have paid staff positions -- although this made me think that Michaelis and Miranda offered Alanna the title of "princess" as a teen, because of her close relationship to them and lack of parents, although she probably didn't really need it, given her grandparents. Anyway, let's also put Jes in this category of "not royal", because they hold no official title or staff position but have a clear association. Michaelis and Noah are Royals but Michaelis is retired and Noah is appointed, so they have similar status to staff. Eddie, too, is "royal but not elected" and his main function is paid staff much like Al and Jerry. So really it's just Gregory who might legally be exempt. In the US, at least, elected officials at the federal level are. So let's presume that getting elected to king exempts you from jury service until you leave office.

Michaelis, Eddie, and Noah (once he turns eighteen) could be summoned to appear, but would immediately be disqualified from criminal cases because they're affiliated with the Crown and could be argued to have an unconscious bias. What we were discussing in comments was in part my thought that Michaelis, who became king (and thus disqualified) very young and ruled most of his life, would be rather excited for a novel civil service experience, and disappointed when he was dismissed.

I think pretty much any of the royal family except Gregory would be qualified to serve, and allowed to in a civil case (Jerry, Alanna, and Jes would also be fine in a criminal case). Jerry and Al are famous-ish as the local nobility, Jes is a famous journalist, and Michaelis, Noah, and Eddie are royals, but I did a bit of research and I guess celebrities aren't given any kind of special exemption usually. And it's canonical that the Shivadh find celebrities amusing at best, so I doubt their presence on a jury would even be particularly disruptive. So yeah, I could see the royal family serving jury duty.

But my brain is a bit sidelong, so while it would be entertaining to write that story, I was thinking more about...hearings, court protocols, the hierarchical structure of the courtroom, and the weird way in which everyone in a court is pushed into a very specific role. I'll probably write more about that in a general sense later, but where it took me was the idea that Gregory, as a king who has a parliament he has to obey but also certain specific unilateral power, might hold something like a quarterly "King's Boon" session ala the Big Block Of Cheese Day from the West Wing.

Some period of time, every few months, he basically holds open office and meets with people who are struggling to get heard in other ways -- people who want to suggest new laws, or want state funding for something, or need help untangling some bureaucratic issue. One person might have an idea for a law but not the legal training to write it up; Gregory might put them in touch with Palace legal, who can help them draft it for presentation to Parliament. Someone else might be having trouble with some kind of bank issue, Gregory can call up the bank and be like "Hey I'm the king and I'm here with one of your clients, let's get this solved before I audit you." When the recording studio collapses at the start of Infinite Jes and Michaelis says "I'm going to have a word with the government about building inspections", if he wasn't the former king he might take that kind of issue to the King's Boon. Two ordinary people who are arguing about some issue but don't want to take it to the courts might ask Gregory to decide the matter for them. Could be who owns the tree in their mutual front yard, could be some kind of philosophical argument they've got a bet about and they're willing to let Gregory rule on it (this is also very Talmudic, the idea of finding a Sage to figure your shit out for you).

And the nice thing is, much like in the West Wing, this is something Royals and palace staff would participate in -- so when Michaelis was king, he and Miranda would both participate (as would Eitan, as Well Connected Nobility); eventually Gregory as prince and then crown prince would participate as part of his training. It's basically "you, too, have a friend in high places" week in the Palace.

So you've got, say, King's Boon Week, where you get a number, show up on your appointed day, and hang out in the ballroom, which has been converted to a waiting room with nice chairs and snacks (presumably people who can't make it in person can get a Zoom call set up). You wait to be called, and you might meet with Gregory, but you also might meet with Eddie, Michaelis, Alanna, or Jerry. Noah would also participate but for a few years he'd be sitting in with Michaelis as training. Eddie would sit in with Gregory for a year or so after officially becoming King Consort, until he had a more thorough grasp of things. I have a feeling Jes would spend the time circulating and interviewing people for a quarterly podcast. :D

That just seems like a cool thing that is possible to achieve given the size and informality of the country, and would make I think potentially a more interesting story.

I mean. Just imagine. You're having trouble getting the permits all in order for the nightclub you want to open, and you're hoping to get Lady Alanna because you know she's got every bureaucratic "in" it's possible to have. But you groan a bit because you draw Duke Gerald, who...sure he's nice, but you've heard he's a daft scatterbrain. But then you meet with him and he goes through your business plan and is like "This is really solid. Let me make a call," and while you're gaping at him he calls a friend in Legal, gets your paperwork in order, phones a guy he knows who has a vacant building that you can lease on the cheap for the first year or two, and then looks you dead in the eye and says, "Do you need investors? I'd take a thirty percent stake in this," and you wander back into the waiting room, dazed, to inform your business partner that you've struck a deal for each of you to sell 15% of the nightclub to His Grace the Duke of Shivadlakia.

Now THAT'S a fun story. :D

(Eddie is like "Just herd anyone who wants to open a restaurant into my office," and the quality of the food in Fons-Askaz, already pretty good, shoots up a notch that year.)

#shivadhverse

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sith-shenanigans · 1 year ago

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Oh! I have a fun additional fact here! Did you (specific you or generic you) know that Horak-Mul was actually part of his era’s equivalent to the Council? It’s certainly another reason why it’s helpful that he’s the one who stays if you release (but don’t redeem) the ghosts. Full disclosure: even my secondary-canon LS inquisitor didn’t redeem the ghosts. Both because it’s not a great decision and because she’s not… actually light. She’s still a darksider, she’s just a really weird one.

But I think the decision to keep/release the ghosts is really one of the places where the game is most successful at making the less-moral option make more sense to do… despite them not making it an alignment decision at all, for some reason. Because you’re right, it’s much more rational to keep the power—the only reason not to, if you didn’t bargain with the first three ghosts (so they can’t just leave anyway), is if you decide that you’d rather risk it than continue to keep a bunch of dead people in spiritual shock collars for their power and knowledge.

(The inquisitor story has some very compelling themes about “now that you’re free, how willing are you to enslave others in turn?”, almost none of which fully get followed through with, which is why my fic version of it is dripping with them, damn it.)

So when Ahene makes the decision, she thinks very strongly about keeping the ghosts. It’s the logical option. It’s the only thing that makes sense to do. She might be fairly powerful on her own, but she traded full access to it for precision and endurance and a talent for esoteric perception-based Force tricks. She certainly doesn’t have the sheer raw strength that would be required to match her new “peers” when she has so little experience. But it’s also a decision, very specifically, to violate one of the few ideals she has left—not just out of immediate necessity, but for good.

(It’s worth noting that the act of Forcewalking has psychological effects on the person who does it, in my fics. Binding much more so than bargaining, but learning the ritual means taking a hollow place in your soul—one carved out by grief, one where you already keep your metaphorical dead—and teaching it to want.)

There’s no reason to let the ghosts go. If there’s no reason to let them go… is there a reason to stop at four? Certainly not a moral one. The Mother Machine’s ritual doesn’t seem to acclimate you to a specific number. There is every option to just keep going.

She lets them leave because she doesn’t think that path leads to any end she’d want.

She is very glad that Horak-Mul stays, because she really does need him.

(And none of this is to argue with your logic—because it really is completely accurate—but to present what I think the main compelling reason to make the illogical decision is.)

(…Nobody is ever redeeming those ghosts.)

The ending to the Sith Inquisitor storyline where the Inquisitor keeps the spirits bound to themselves is objectively the best ending if they're going to continue being Dark Lord of the Sith.

It just makes sense in every conceivable way.

You're now Darth [Nox, Imperius, Occulus], Dark Lord of the Sith, and Most Honourable Councillor Sphere of Ancient Knowledge of the Council of Dark Lords. It's known that membership to the Dark Council can sometimes last months if not days. Regardless of your wants, you are now in a very dangerous position, because you've got any ambitious Sith Lord within your own sphere (who undoubtedly has had more experience than you) looking to bring you down: more if your policies are distinctly unpopular.

Meanwhile, as a Sith Lord, you've only had three years, minimum, worth of experience. We can fudge the numbers a bit for the sake of headcanon. I personally think time at the Sith Academy lasts up to three years, so my 'Quisitor would have six years worth of Sith-ly training under their belt.

I don't know about you, but having just bound several spirits of Sith Lords long since passed, granting me a possible form of immortality, on top of whatever enhancements the Mother Machine and the Forbidden Gormak Ritual entailed, sounds like a good idea to just... keep them.

Also, also, you now have several Sith Lords bound to you: you know, experienced Sith who could logically give you advice about how to act as a Dark Lord and Councillor of the Dark Council? Sure, they might not have any direct experience, and depending on your relationship with them, it might prove difficult to get the advice in the first place, but it's still invaluable knowledge to covet. Also, you might just be able to force the spirits to comply?

#presumably you cannot eat infinite ghosts but the number is more than four. it is probably more than five #and keeping them means knowing that if you don't have enough… you can always find even more #it's not inevitable. you could choose to stop there. you can always choose to stop.#but you could also choose to bind a fifth and no more. or a sixth.#and maybe knowing that is worse than knowing you could keep going.#(and that path is less likely to lead to an embarrassing death—by now—than to a planet in ruins. you can't stop if you don't want to.)#io's replies

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