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#and im starting uni again next week
megumi-fm · 4 months
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#okay random story time i don't know why im narrating this or how i even stumbled upon this memory rn#but i generally do sad vents in the tags and for a change this is a funny one#so back in highschool (i say highschool but i mean junior college) i used to visit this park near my house a lot#i was an sg kid back then and the thing about parks there is that they're kinda beach-parks and they have the best cycling/running tracks#they're also really massive parks so i used to go often. sometimes bicycling. other times walking. yeah. the park was like my sanctuary#anyway. there are quite a few bike rental areas in the park and there was a cute lil shop next to this one particular rental place#and they sold like biscuits and water and icecreams and stuff and i went there a lot#and on one particular day i went there and there was this guy around my age part timing at that shop#now again this might be culture specific bc i dont see it in india but part timing in uni/pre-uni is pretty common is sg#a lot of shops and restaurants employ teenagers to twenty something ppl for part time jobs... anyway im just adding context#point is that i had walked to the park with my mum that day and she told me to go buy a couple icecreams so i went to the shop#and i saw this guy around my age and like. not to be a simp but this dude was so pretty?#like he saw someone had come to the counter so he looked up and shot a smile and i thought i got slapped by sunlight#i could spend the next several lines going on about his pretty tan skin and his glowing raven eyes but this is pathetic enough so ill stop#anyway he saw me and smiled really wide (customer service smile- i thought to myself) and i smiled back and asked for icecreams or whatever#and then this guy started getting chatty right. so he was all 'you come here (to the park) often right? ive seen you with your bike a lot'#see now. the problem with me is that i always think im bothering people. this poor dude was attempting to make conversation#and i was replying with one word answers#and i wasn't even realizing that he didnt want that. bc he kept asking more questions and i. kept. shutting them down.#then when he gave me the icecream he was all 'are you here alone? icecream alone is no fun... i could keep you company if you want..?'#which. he was being really cute about right. but because im so fucking dense i was all 'oh no i came with my mom actually'#and he went 'aw man' in this really cute but faux sad way which i didnt understand at the time and i left and then#after three full fucking days. i realized this man was tryna hit on me?#and then i went to the park like a week later and he was gone. poof. i even thought of asking the uncle in charge of that place#then i got too embarrassed and chickened out#yeah so turns out my neurodivergence neutralizes any sort of rizz that comes my way#i could've been chilling with a cute boyf rn but no😩 this is my destiny#megumi in the tags
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newtness532 · 11 months
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why can't i just do things when i say i will do them?
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deus-ex-mona · 2 months
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anyways! it’s herohei hours~~~~~~
#start the new week r i g h t with herohei and nghy!!!!!#truly the ‘everyone supports nghy’ song of all time~~~~~~~~~~~~#waiting for nagisa’s next mv though~~~~~~ i hope ymk illustrates it~~ she hasn’t illustrated any omoiai song mvs after all so~~~~~~#i wanna see nghy in ymk’s artstyle again… they were s o o o o o cute on the sukiitai album cover#manifesting a nghy duet for the next album (delusional) what if it’s called ‘heroine and prince’. or even ‘heroine and chef’. w h a t then#let lxl be nghy’s fairy godmother in this trying time p l s im beggingngng those two idiots are obsessed with nagisa lmao#still thinking about that interview post-1st izumo collab where they talked about how they successfully converted nagisa into their fan#‘nagisa def became our fan. no doubt about it.’ ‘let’s confirm it with him when we next meet him’ ok losers#w a i t (cursed) what if nghy’s first duet turns out to be them going on a date to a lxl concert in their uni arc—#we already have toxic yuri julieta x julieta (chuucon) s o we can totally have childhood friends julieta x julieta too in nghy r i g h t —#though help i think a nagisa solo about a mundane ‘im a loyal sicks… b u t i now have julieta tendencies and i h a t e it help’ crisis#would be very v e r y funny too. j. just imagine him picturing himself being princess carried by aizo despite being like. 10cm taller. l o l#…what am i even thinking how did i go from herohei to nagisa julieta crisis.#(alsooooo being toxic on main w o r k e d lmfaoooooo i haven’t seen hiyoship twt discourse in the hours since i posted it)#h a p p y l u c k y s m i l e h o o r a y ~ !#ig big brother truly is 👁️watching👁️ but hey my dash is purged so im not complainin~~~~~~#anyways!!!!!! herohei and its nghy uni arc hints triumphs all!!! enjoy your week ok byeeeee#the dude from gamushara
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forgotten-daydreamer · 3 months
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Took twice the max dose of melatonin before the final revision for tomorrow’s exam, I’m shitting my pants and I genuinely don’t know anything as thoroughly as I should but if I sleep less than 4 hrs before it I just know I’m gonna do even worse somehow
#don’t take twice the max dose of anything btw#genuinely don’t do the shit that I do#i only did it bc I know my limits and haven’t had any other substances in over 24 hrs but don’t ever try it#always talk to your gp before taking any meds and supplements at all#anyway psa aside#I want to revise for two hrs so until 1.30am circa but I genuinely hope I pass out sometime in the next hours and a half#godspeed ig#uni#melatonin#I have super high expectations but I genuinely prepared this exam in like 4 days and my brain has been all over the place#haven’t had the chance (economic too so please please consider sparing a couple of bucks for my ko-fi?) to meet my therapist in 2 weeks#been super suicidal super busy dealing with stuff and people and my family and uni and ah oh how I wish I had a brain able to focus#also the ‘visions of horror’ as I call them have lowkey turned into auditory hallucinations that never stop and it’s… tough#genuinely so tired of everything in general#I’d promised to hang with my uni friends after the exam bc I should be done my midday tops but I know im gonna be super sad and underwhelme#so I hope I can be at home by 4 pm tops with one excuse or the other#I love them all so much but I need a break. also bc I got another exam in less than a fucking week and I still haven’t started studying for#it because it’s objectively easier than tomorrow’s and because when was I supposed to study for it#I spent 3 good days working on a paper that isn’t even mine for a subject I don’t even take#a favor for a friend which turned into 3 more friends asking me if I could help them with theirs#and you know me#I never say no. unfortunately. but also I’m super glad they want my help bc they know I can write at least (one good thing)#but. that’s still -3 days available#then. the demons#wasted so many hours just pacing and biting my nails raw and being pathetic#so yeah. in a little under 15 hrs I want to be in bed again. resting until the 19th when the cycle will begin anew#also math ain’t mathing. my exam is in 12 hrs only now 13.
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ajax-mew · 4 months
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when i back in uni
me think
i do uni updates again
#i used to do them#and was basically like day 1 i made friend she uggo and she basically torture her dog#(it was a tiny dog and she would send it to a trainer and not see it for weeks and she also missgender me a LOT)#day 2 everyone was uggo and big meanies and missgender me#day 5 sm gurl call me Konstantina (not my deadname ir clos to it and a girls name)#day 6 that same girl called me amy and a girl name (not close ti Damien and a girls name)#day 6 again i correct that girl and said is Damien and am a boy in front of ppl#day 10 that girl from b4 called me 'that uhh little boy over there ' we were the same age maybe i was a yr older than her#day 15 i wore 2 binders qnd went to the bathroom coz i couldn't breath#day idk anymore sm teacher called me girl thrn apologized and called me a young man (only positive)#day 24 that girl w the dog spoke abt canibalism w me (also pos but i regret it coz normies shouldn't know abt it)#day 56 the girl w the dog said she had a girl in her school w similar vibe as me (i was still a he) she kept missgender me#day 32 sm other girl v cool asked for my pronouns (she probably the only out if them i could have been friends)#day idk i quit uni to sad i go to therapy depressed want kill self (then i started t and changed legally my name etc#also my mom when i 1st go to uni didn't take all gender stuff seriously#like i was w my mom at the secretary and i told the secretary if could write my name Damien and my pronouns next to my name#at the papers the teachers see#and my mom and secretary was laughing and say 'hohoho but u wint be speak to me all the time'#im not ask to speaking to u am ask to write at the teachers paper#so I don't try to kill my self in the unis bathroom#and so i don't have to start every sentence with ' am actually a boy and my name is Damien '#I FKN HATE EVERYONE THERE AND I HOPE TJEY DIE#the main teacher of graphic design change so they maybe better now i hope#the reason i choce tjat uni was coz when i go there#was btwn 2#the other didn't even show me around and thought i would enrol#the one i went i hadn't said anything abt my gender yet#but the teacher was 'misgender me ' he was say he and then correct it and say she#i didn't correct him at the time coz wasn't sure i would go there but v cool#that's allmost a full vent in the tags
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kimmkitsuragi · 11 months
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"if i finish this i will watch a horror movie" thing kinda backfired it's 9pm lmao
#will i still do it. yes. probably.#it would probably be more fun in the night too so yeah#but god fucking damn it can i please just finish this thing#i cant even be properly mad at myself because ive been Actually Working in these last days lol#at last!!!#it feels like i can actually finish the whole thing next week :')#i started this at the beginning of September goddddddddd 😭😭#if i took it more seriously from the start it would've been done by now lol#but i guess at least im making progress#i am kinda getting nervous thinking abt deadlines and actually applying even tho i still have like a month for one school#and 2+ months for others lol#there's one in italy that's earlier than that but not sure if i wanna go for that one tbh so........ idk#but since it's wayy cheaper and i dont have many cheap options and i fear the same thing (aka not being able to go bc#of money) will happen again this year lol#so yeah just. not sure in general.#if i think too much about any of this i start to question everything anyway lmao so i shouldnt <3#i gotta visit my old uni to talk abt some letters too which i Know for a fact they would write#but it's so nerve wracking to think about butttt i gotta do it this week/early next week so.....#(this week means actually the next week in this case i guess lmao since it's friday rn)#bc they said 2 weeks notice sooooo im guessing that would be okay but u knowwwwwww ugh#okay. my goal is to just do this thing today#then finish the whole project tomorrow#then do the other readjustments for the other projects in a few days hopefully#then go to school#yeah. doable. perfectly doable#i gotta arrange the (redacted) and (redacted) meetings too lol buttttt yeah#🗒#wow i didnt intend to write this much tbh anyway
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8aji · 1 year
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im a lil embarrassed that most of the posts ive posted (duh) as of late were text posts abt me being sick LMFAO n it feels silly to write this but i think i may log out of this acc for a lil while at least on mobile <3
#not being able to write is making me feel a lil dizzy dizzy#a lil embarrassed a lil 'i do not belong' ya know???#hm yeah i also need to get off my phone bc i start uni next week and i need to wake up early and im soooo stressed bc of another uni thingy#so...i will be deactivating 😔👊#im joking im joking#ofc i wont deactivate i think my shrink would kill me if i did anyway /hj#she was the once that convinced me to make the writing blog#but rn the internet doesnt feel good to me and i need to be more present and more real and prioritise other aspects of my life#i wanna be more stable and journal and move my body and read books bc i like the feeling of the paper and and#i had the sweetest ask ever about my book recs and i was also a lil embarrassed to respond bc im not much of a reader but i try TT#anyway !! aside from this mildly incoherent ramble which i loved writing ngl#i havent been writing a lot and i think ive lowkey un-hyperfixated on tr and jjk so the inspo isnt inspoing#and tbh that feels a lil awful to say bc tr has taught me so many things and helped me grow and im so painfully in love with shin but idk#idk what happened i think i just hit a lil bump in the road of life and the stress has me focused more on real life and other things than#my darling beloveds. and im sure itll pass like most things in life i will feel good again#but rn it doesnt. i havent even caught up with the latest ep of tr :') but nonetheless writing is one of my truest loves as well#so i will comeback hopefully with a few stories mapped out including a lil gojo series and all that fun jazz :D#i have shin naoto izana gojo and toji in store !! and tbh im not ready to just leave them all behind#ANYWAY OKAY this' gone for too long LMFAO but thank u if u read till here i think i needed to rant#that means ill probably be less active than im already am but ill be back !!#still i dont think this exactly qualifies as a hiatus so i wont mark it down as such wait is this a semi-hiatus??? lmfao idk but eh 🤷‍♀️#i love love love love love yall so so so much and forevever and always will#MWAH#<3
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finnickodaiir · 7 months
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Having a queue running is fun, but having to set it up is soooo :(
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alxclaremont · 1 year
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meh
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fivefeetfangirl · 1 year
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well it is already 2am
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amaranthineinadream · 2 years
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No offense but how am I supposed to be normal after discovering Ethel Cains music this summer... Like ive had that shit on repeat for the past like 8hrs and Idk how im supposed to go to bed instead of going insane rn. Saw a youtube comment that was like Discovering ethel cain is the worst thing that ever happened to me but in a good way and im like HONESTLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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natspookie · 1 year
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match made in uni
☆ teacher college au ; strict adviser!nat (science teacher) x coadviser cute!reader (english teacher)
— im sure school isnt the same for everyone butttt for me in each class we have a teacher assigned as our advisor!!! they also teach classes
— longass oneshot because i’ve been working on this for two months……
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soon, it was the beginning of a new school year at nyu. natasha, a science teacher known for her strictness, is finally getting her own advisory class.
natasha walks over to to her desk at the large, wine colored faculty and the new paper at the bulletin board catches her eye.
the list of co-advisors and advisors for this school year. natasha walks towards it and racks her eyes for her name and sees another beside it.
advisor - co advisor
Romanoff, Natasha - Y/l/n, Y/n
Barnes, Bucky - Rogers, Steve
Maximoff, Wanda - Barton, Clint
natasha furrows her eyebrows at the unfamiliar name next to hers.
“wanda, who is y/n y/l/n?” natasha turns around to the other redhead. if anyone were to know who and what, it would be wanda.
wanda was always the first to get on campus, natasha second.
“oh! she’s the new english teacher. very sweet young woman, maria accepted that job in harvard, remember?” she says with a sweet smile.
“you know this how?” natasha takes her seat in front of her desk, beside wanda’s “i bumped into her as she was given a tour, you’ll love her as your co- advisor!” natasha gave a hum.
she didn’t meet you till 2 weeks before the school year started. a faculty meeting was held at the auditorium. natasha walked in, expecting to be second, but was now third. she saw wanda and a y/h/c talking.
“nat!” wanda waved her over as the y/h/c turned her head to see natasha approaching “natasha, this is y/n! y/n, natasha”
“y/n” you smiled, extending your hand for a handshake “romanoff” she shook your hand once and dropped it “oh- of course, y/l/n then” you laughed as she nodded, taking the seat beside wanda.
natasha wouldn’t lie, you were attractive. she just didn’t know you enough. the meeting soon started, briefing what would happen when the students came. the list of advisors and co-advisors came up, making each person familiar with who they were working with.
after that, natasha soon realized your desk was beside hers at the faculty. you didn’t have much but some flowers at the side and sticky notes up.
natasha didn’t see much of you till the week of school starting itself. “wanda, do you happen do have y/l/n’s phone number?” “why don’t you ask her yourself, flirty” wanda giggled
“not in that way, genius. we need to prep our classroom” “sureeee… here ya go” wanda gave a post it as natasha grumbled, taking it.
Natasha Romanoff
Y/l/n, if you’re free please meet me
at our assigned room tomorrow. Thanks.
— N.R
Y/n Y/l/n
Sure! Around what time? :)
Natasha Romanoff
11AM Sharp.
Y/n Y/l/n
Got it! See you there!
“nat why are you being so dry to this poor woman” wanda looked over natasha’s desk as she hid her phone to her chest. “snoopy” “dry texter” “Well she’s my co-advisor! I’ve never had one and I like to handle things on my own”
“A, you’ve never even been an advisor, you need help. B, she’s kind, don’t break her. C, she’s pretty, maybe date her” wanda winked again “oh fuck you” natasha rolled her eyes “romanoff! we’re in school” “oh come on, I hear you swearing at little maximoff all day”
11am the next day came and each advisor and co had to decorate their own classroom. natasha and you decided to just make it as simple as possible. you two were decorating with quiet music playing from a vinyl player.
“sorry if ever i’m being rude or dry, i don’t trust people easily” natasha said, breaking the comfortable silence as she hung up decorations over the board.
“i don’t blame you, you did just meet me last week” you let out a chuckle as natasha climbed down the short ladder “natasha” she extended her hand “y/n” you shook it “I think this is good enough” natasha looks around the decorated classroom, satisfied.
“mhm… hey, wanna grab lunch? i know a great place around here” you suggested “why not”
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you and natasha walked over to a café after lunch for come coffee “order?” she asked you as you took a seat “iced caramel macchiato please” she nodded and ordered for you both
natasha told you about her many stories as a teacher. “yeah this one time some kid threw a fit and ripped all the pages from their book” natasha said with a low laugh “oh lord” you shook your head with a smile
“what about you? is this your first teaching job?” natasha tilted her head “sort of? i was a student teacher for 2 years before i graduated this year”
“oh, so you’re like fresh out of college?” “yup, i kind of retook a year in grade school though so i was like a year or two older than my batch mates. they graduated 22 and 23 and me, 24” i shrugged sipping on my coffee. “that’s nice”
“what about you?” “my age? i’m 36.” your eyes widened at that “look, i know i’m old but at least don’t make it obvious” natasha laughed lowly “no! no i just- you don’t look it at all, i honestly thought you were in your 20s” you chuckled “well thank you, i’m flattered” natasha smiled
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the morning of your first day, natasha handed you an iced caramel macchiato and you blushed as she remembered your order. “nervous?” she smiled, taking her seat beside you.
natasha wore a black betau top with cream wide leg trousers. you wore a lace flare top with flare pants.
“sort of, i have 3 classes today. they’ll probably hate me” you groan and take a long sip of the coffee “unlikely, you’re very likable. you may even take wanda’s place as nicest teacher. but if they ever disrespect you or any of that, i will personally have a chat with them”
“i really appreciate you, natasha” she nodded and stood up, extending her hand “time to have our first advisory class” she winked and you chuckled, shaking your head.
“good morning class, i’m ms romanoff, your advisor this school year. and beside me is your co-advisor, ms y/l/n. i’ve been teaching at nyu for 5 years and this is my first advisory class. i will also be your science teacher.” natasha said with a straight face as she turned to look at you before looking back at the students
“hi! good morning, i’m ms y/l/n, your co- advisor and english teacher this school year! it’s my first year teaching and i look forward to getting to know everyone” you smiled
natasha briefed everyone on general instructions and the schedule. english as first period today and science as last.
“that’s it, be good everyone, thank you” natasha stopped her presentation and all the students went off to chattering. you opened your laptop, opening your slides when natasha whispered behind you. “good luck, you’ll do great” she winked and you thanked her before you heard the door shut.
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if’s been a month of teaching with natasha. you were cleaning up your things as your finished your class when natasha walked in, her class being the one after yours.
she made small talk to you while setting up her own things. she made you laugh when a student suddenly asked. “ms y/l/n! you’re a lesbian, correct?” your eyes widened at the topic
“excuse me, i don’t think it’s appropriate to ask a teacher that.” natasha shut them up as you both left the classroom, sharing a laugh
you had slipped out the fact you had a girlfriend in college to natasha on one of your café hangouts so she probably got the hint.
"what got them to ask that question" natasha chuckled "well the boys keep asking me out and i keep declining them. but don't they get they are students?!" “oh trust me, it gets better. i’ve had my fair share of questions and-” natasha halted her words when she got the hint some students were whispering as the both of you passed by the halls.
“what are they whispering about?” “i’m actually not sure as well” you said “well i’ll see you after class” you waved to natasha, making your way to the classroom.
“ms y/l/n, i don’t mean to invade your privacy or anything but- are you and ms romanof dating? everyone has been talking about it and- i- i just didn’t want to assume” a student came up to you and you choked on your spit
“i- um- no! and i’m sure ms romanoff wouldn’t fancy the idea of students talking about her love life.” you shook it off with a smile, thoughts racing through your head. no way natasha would go for you.
“students are saying we’re dating?!?”
"hey, you've been staring intently at that paper for awhile, you alright?" natasha tapped your shoulder, standing beside you.
"this interpretation is so..." "so.." "read it for yourself" you lifted the paper up to natasha "pick a line from any shakespeare poem and interpret it... the answer was..”
'my chosen poem is 'o never say that i was false of heart' and my line is 'as from soul, which in thy breast doth lie', i think it means shakespeare approves of lesbians’"
"you can laugh" you said as natasha let out a loud laugh, covering her mouth. you looked up and you saw natasha smile widely before looking into your eyes.
time went by too slowly when natasha cleared her throat and handed you back the paper. “it’s funny” she stated, sitting back in her seat. the silence was now awkward.
of course she wouldn’t go for you. “yeah” you whispered and stood up. natasha watched you as her words died in her throat.
the next few weeks were you avoiding natasha as much as you could, and her doing nothing to fix it.
you had a particularly rough week with taking an extra class since wanda was down with the cold. you happened to have a love for history as well.
the papers to grade were twice as much now. you rubbed your forehead in frustration as you were the only one on school campus.
“y/n?” you turned around to see natasha by the door “yeah” you murmured before turning back to the papers. “it’s 1 am what are you doing?!” she walked over to your desk and saw the amount of papers scattered.
“go home” she stated “not done” you whispered, leaning on the palm of your hand “you can continue tomorrow, dekta” natasha let the nickname slip but was thankful you were too out of it to notice
natasha started filing the papers for you as you rested your head against the desk. “i can take homeroom alone so you don’t have to get in till 10am, ‘kay?” she helped you stand up as you murmured a yes.
“you won’t fall asleep driving?” she asked and you shook your head. “safe travels” she watched as you drove off.
the next morning students frowned at the loss of their favorite teacher in homeroom. “alright, we finished a few minutes early so… any questions?” natasha asked and received many raised hands
“yes, diana?” “where’s ms y/n?” natasha softened at the mention, not going unnoticed by the students “she- she’s taking a rest but will be here for your 3rd period”
“is her girlfriend taking care of her?” a student piqued. natasha stiffened “whatever ms y/l/n and her partner do is not relevant.” natasha looked at her watch and grabbed her stuff “have a good first period everyone.”
natasha couldn’t help but feel a weight on her chest by the thought of you having a partner that isn’t her.
unbeknownst to her, the students were ready in their cupid skills.
“i’m telling you, diana! she frowned and got all cold again by the mention of ms y/n having a girlfriend!” the student argued. “what if we sent fake flowers to her desk and ms romanoff got more jealous!” “that’s so childish!” “well- i am a teen?” the students bickered but quickly got quiet when their next subject teacher came.
the next day natasha’s mood got worse upon seeing roses on your table, with a note. you came a few minutes after hers.
“morning ms romanoff” natasha tried to hold her tounge at the downgrade from natasha to ms romanoff.
“morning y/n, you know you can call me natasha, right?” you nodded but smiled at the flowers on your desk
“girlfriend?” she asked and you laughed “no” you opened up the card to see a horrible pickup line that made you laugh.
“people ask me what blush i use, i just show them a photo of you and i’m all roses” you read out loud to natasha.
“corny” she snickered “yeah? you can do better than that, romanoff?” natasha spun her chair to face you “as a matter of fact, yes.” “try me” you smirked “oh you’ll see.”
since then, every morning you would get to your desk with a pickup line from natasha which were undeniably good.
it’s been four months of teaching when you left quite frantically that piqued natasha’s interest,
“what’s the rush?” she chuckled “gotta date” you shoved your stuff into your bag “bye wanda, steve, bruce, tasha!” you left before a reply
“hope she gets laid” wanda muttered, earning a slap from natasha “what! i’m being supportive!” natasha grumbled in response
the next day, natasha was surprised to see you and wanda earlier than usual. “morning nat!” wanda greeted and you forced a smile to her as well “what’s wrong?” “she stood me up… i got a lot of work done last night though” you leaned back in your seat
“i’m sorry y/n/n” natasha set her stuff down and handed you the daily pickup line. she smiled when you laughed. “how do you never fail to come up with a bad one?!? this is like number sixty!” “one of my many talents” natasha winked.
“imma get coffee, be right back” you left and wanda immediately said “ask her out.” “what?” natasha looked at wanda “come onnnnnn! it’s been 4 months” “should i really?” natasha asked quietly and wanda shrieked a yes. a small smile was forming on natasha’s face at the idea.
the next day natasha came even earlier than wanda and set roses on your desk.
natasha fiddled with her pen when you walked in “morning wands, morning tasha” you sat on your desk and smiled at the roses. wanda quietly snuck out the door. “are these from you?” you smirked, jokingly at natasha. “yes, and this is for you, natasha said seriously and handed you a post it. in specific, a sticky note that asks you out. this one finally has her name signed on the bottom.
“i- of course” you smiled at natasha “great! i- um- i’ll pick you up tonight at your place” “alright” you smiled widely “i have a thing- i’ll be back” she nodded as you left.
bonus-
you kept all post its from natasha and she was in awe when she saw them in the box.
the students all went crazy when they saw you both kissing online.
wanda was a bridesmaid at the wedding.
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woncherie · 2 years
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i sat in my lecture and started daydreaming about scaramouche,, this is what came out. enjoy!!
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: afab!reader, no pronouns used, bully!scara, bullying, sub!scara, reader makes him a sub lol, nsfw, alcohol drinking, nsfw under alcohol influence, small mention of drugs, finger sucking, spit play, thigh riding, degradation, blackmail. (please tell me if I missed something)
wc: 2.2k
part 1 / part 2 / part 3
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You kneeled on the floor of the campus, hair and clothes wet with some fluid you couldnt specify yourself. it definitely wasn't water. you looked up the windows to the upper floors, seeing a familiar face looking down on you and your now wet books and clothing.
"oops. my mistake." you heard scaramouche yell down to you, his friends also peaking down the window and laughing histerically. obviously, it wasn't a mistake. and he wasn't sorry. he never was.
scaramouche was a fellow student of yours. he was popular, had good grades without even trying, was participating in multiple uni sports clubs and everyone loved him. everyone but you.
its not like you hated him from the beginning. you were indifferent about him, you only heared rumors about him the first year in uni, he was a complete stranger to you. but when he met you for the first time, scaramouche made it his personal goal to destroy you.
you hated him. you hated his ugly face, his annoying laugh, his irritating character, his whole bothersome being.
but why does he hate you? you never treated him wrong, hell, you barely even know him. he just started mistreating you one day without a warning, shoving you around, kicking your books through the hallways, destroying your property and forcing you to do his work.
the second the professor is mentioning a group project he is up your ass, smirking dangerously and making you do all the work. and dont even dare fucking up the project and ruining his grades. "im looking forward to good cooperation.~" was all he always said before never showing up to the projects again.
the bullying continues over a whole year, which made it really hard for you to find friends in the new semester. everyone knew that he has you on his watch, and everyone knows if you are friends with them, he's gonna be up their ass too.
you only found one friend, but he is the best. you didnt need more. he didnt care about the bullying or the "danger" of being close to you.
albedo always helped you with your projects when your very useful partner refused to do his share, which resulted in you always passing and sending in your project before the deadline.
even though the past semester ended some months ago and the new one started, scaramouche and his jerk ass friends didnt let you go (which you prayed for every other night.)
But you didnt want him to destroy your last year at college, you wanted fun, you wanted friends, you wanted a normal college life. you promised yourself to not let him get away with everything again, to fight back.
but somehow, you still sat on the concrete floor, a big puddle of whatever the fuck this fluid is right under you and your books. fuck.
you can't believe that everything is starting all over again. you promised yourself to fight back this time.
the semester just started a week ago, and things didnt change. it frustrated you to no end to just sit there defenseless, but what should you do? stepping up for yourself seemed so much easier in your head.
"Are you coming to the party later tonight?" you heared albedo ask. he laid down on his stomach on your bed, tablet on your pillow, preparing the lectures for the next day.
you went home and skipped your lecture earlier today, showering and drying your hair. whatever scaramouche threw on you smelled like shit, and you didnt want it to stain your clothing.
"are YOU going?" you asked the blonde who seemed to be heads deep into his notes. "usually it's me who forces you to leave your home and meet a few new people.", you teased him.
uni started barely a week ago, therefore semester partys followed right behind. especially at the beginning, where most of the students aren't drowning too much in lab reports, protocols and exams yet.
"yeah, that's why I'm asking you. you didnt mention the party yet, which isn't like you at all."
You sat down next to your door at the plug socket, inserting the airdryer and drying your hair before answering. "The first few parties are the best ones. of course I'm going."
you just arrived with albedo at the party and you two immediately got dragged to the beer pong table by a few friends of him that you barely knew. they usually tried to avoid your presence, but once they are shit ton of drunk, everyone of them becomes your friend as well. it was always like this. you didnt mind it, you were just happy that at least a few people were talking to you.
You enjoyed the first few hours at the party a lot, drinking and playing games, shotting drinks and dancing to the music.
of course, scaramouche and his friends were at the party too, drinking heavily, smoking weed and fighting around. but you didnt care. you ignored them all, immediately leaving the room when they appeared in your view.
You pulled albedos arm and pointed into the kitchen once they headed near you. "let's head there, sucrose and yanfei are there too."
he just nodded and followed you, trying his best to walk properly.
After you shared a few more drinks with your friends, the alcohol did start hitting you properly.
you tried your hardest to ignore scaramouche and his friend group who were partying hard in the living room of the house, standing in the kitchen with albedo and sucrose yourself. where even is he? you thought, not spotting him with the rest of his friends who were all shit ton of drunk, dancing or making out with poor girls from the lower semesters. how pitiful. they didnt know what will happen to them. dont fuck the bad guys, they will drain you mentally and destroy you, only to drop them afterwards like an used tissue.
not that you cared though. you are happy to not see scaramouche ugly face constantly in the crowd of people.
you didnt plan on letting him destroy your last year in college, you will NOT let him destroy you like last year. at least that's what your plan was. somehow he still succeeded in bullying you regularly in the first week of the new semester.
after shotting a few more drinks you lean to albedo who was sitting on your left side, speaking in his ear tipsily. "I need a bit fresh air, ill be going out for a few minutes."
it took albedo quite a few seconds to understand what you said, being more than just a bit woozy himself. "Yeah sure." he answered then.
you stood up and started walking down the hallway towards the door, dodging pissed drunk students left and right. a few of them recognized you, waved and nodded at you, which you always mimiced.
Once you left through the door and stood at the front yard, a cold breeze passed you and you immediately shivered. should've taken a jacket with me. you let your head fall back into your neck, closing your eyes and rubbing your arms to warm yourself up a bit, taking in deep breaths of fresh air. the house really started to smell sweaty and clammy, so the air really made you feel better right now.
Right when you started to enjoy the cold breeze, you hear someone chuckle behind you. "Wow, you really must like me, everywhere i go you are following me." you recognized his voice immediately, sighing slightly annoyed the second you heared him snicker behind you.
You looked over your shoulder, seeing scaramouche leaning against the house wall, a nearly completely smoked cig between his lips, and damn did you curse yourself for checking him out. you hoped he didnt notice.
"Fuck off, im not in the mood." you miffed, leaning your head back once again into your neck.
"The fuck you doing here? shouldnt you be studying in your little room for the next exams? you still have a few protocolls and lab reports of mine to prepare, too." he pushed himself of the wall that he leaned on, dropping the cigarette on the floor and stepping on it before making his way to you, grinning stupidly. You knew he was about to harrass you again.
you started to become mad. more than usual. you didnt know if it was the alcohol that made you more agressive, but you were done with him. you couldnt let him continuously step on you and your dignity, you needed to fight back to get rid of him.
before he even arrived next to you, you turned around and faced him, your hand landing on his face, grabbing it and pushing him against the wall he just walked away from, your hands squishing his cheeks and making his mouth open.
scaramouches eyes widened in shock, not expecting you to get violent, out of all people.
"I told you to fuck off right now, didnt i?" your face came closer to his, feeling your hot breath on his face. "im done playing your stupid games. find yourself another victim." Your nails started digging into his cheeks, making him whine out and moan in pain silently, his eyes never leaving your face, heart beating a bit faster than usual. he didnt even notice the small moan he let out until it was your turn to widen your eyes slightly.
"Did you just-?"
It took him a moment to realise what you were talking about. once he did though, his whole face started getting red, eyes wide in fear and awkwardness. this did not just happen. no way. he panicked, his brain not being able to form complete sentences and finding excuses.
"There is no way.." You started laughing slowly, but louder and louder by every passing second. "Scaramouche? You? A masochist?"
Scaramouche didnt know what to do other than shake his head in denial, eyes tearing up in embarrassment.
"Let go of me." he demanded, heart hammering against his chest, but you only continued laughing. "are you stupid? after all these months of you destroying my life, do you seriously believe im going to just let you go this easily? you fucking slut."
You pushed two of your fingers into his mouth and he couldnt help himself but suck on them obediently. fuck. that's it. he thought. he's done.
but he didnt care. he doesnt know if it was the alcohol and the drugs in his blood, but he leaned into your touch, enjoying the way you degraded him. he didnt even check if there are other people around on the front yard, he didnt care. he just needed your touch.
your own breath started speeding up too, enjoying the view in front of you even more than scaramouche does. "Not so bold now, are you?" you teased him, your left hand supporting your body weight on the wall, caging him in.
scaramouches way of answering was sucking hard on your fingers, swirling his tongue around the digits. your leg settled between his two, and he gave in, sliding down the wall until he sat on your thigh, hard dick pressing on it. you couldn't help but gasp, your grin growing bigger and bigger as he moved his hips on your leg.
"open up." you said after removing your fingers from his mouth, looking at him demandingly. his face was flushed, hair dishelved, pupils widen in lust, no thoughts in his head left. he opened his mouth, waiting nervously about what you are gonna do next.
you took a second and collected spit in your mouth, leaning over his head and letting it drip down into his own. "dont swallow yet." you ordered.
scaramouche stood there, mouth still wide open with your spit on his tongue, dick pulsating in his pants, arms pressed to the wall and you couldnt feel better about the whole situation. "why can't you always be this obedient?" you asked him. "you could've saved me so much harm."
he looked up to you with big eyes, getting more and more impatient. but instead of giving him what he wanted, what he needed, you took your phone out of your pocket and took a quick picture of him in this position.
scaramouche didnt know how fast it happened. was it the alcohol that made him react slower? was he too horny to even say anything until it was too late? he didnt know.
he chocked on the spit and you let go of him, the lack of your touch and the cold wind breeze making him freeze. "Did you just???" he began to ask, but you took a few steps back.
"Dare to come close to me in uni again, and the whole campus will see a picture of their beloved football player being a horny slut on my thigh." you blackmailed him.
Scaramouche couldn't help but open his mouth and close it again continuously, unable to cope with the whole situation right now.
"You dont dare.." he said, trying to threaten you, but you didnt give in.
"Watch me." you said, showing him your middle finger before slowly leaving him behind, quoting him before disappearing completely. "I'm looking forward to good cooperation.~"
☆☆☆
every time I post a fic I have the urge to apologize for my broken english. I hope you still enjoyed it nonetheless!!
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nubisaureus · 1 year
Text
when they get jealous and needy
how the genshin men show their jealousy over you
character(s): Cyno, Xiao, Kaeya
pairings(s): fem!reader x Cyno, Xiao, Kaeya (separately)
contents: uncertainty of feelings, smut, found family, angst, comfort
not proofread! im swamped with uni work so i might post less till next week, sorry <3
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Cyno
he's absolutely chill most of the time, but there are some times he just gets jealous and insecure
you bet he's going to mark his territory: whether it is by putting his hand around your waist, pulling you close, whispering something in your ear while looking the other person dead in the eyes, his golden irises sending a silent warning
«And who's this, angel?» he asks, as he gets to your side
you better believe he's gonna get extra needy/rough when you two get in bed later
as he's balls deep in your pussy, he groans «you're mine, aren't you, angel?»
you struggle to answer. not because you don't know what to answer, but because you can't think properly, as he's relentlessly pounding into you, making you lose any semblance of rational thought
he stops, still inside of you.
«answer.» he commands now, making you squirm and whine for more.
«C-cyno..» you plead, incapable of uttering any other word than his name.
«yes?» his pupils dark and wide, much like the ones of a predator
«i am Cyno. that guy was just flirting with me because he can't stand you. he wants to make you angry because the matra once apprehended him due to his illegal schemes, and so he wants to take it out on you..» you utter those words, remembering the case that had shaken your Darshan from the inside out, before Cyno was even the general Mahamatra
as you finish speaking, he starts to pound into you again, making you scream his name, finally getting the release you were aching for
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Xiao
poor thing is still new to this having feelings for someone, so when he gets angry when another guy talks with you in a more friendly way, he doesn't know what to do with his feelings
so he goes to Zhongli, asking for advice (a/n yes, i believe in Zhongli as Xiao's found family, idc)
«Rex L-» «Just Zhongli.»
he looks down, biting his lip at the correction. it doesn't feel fair to him to call Rex Lapis as simply Zhongli, but he carries on, explaining his problem
«What you are experiencing is what mortals call "jealousy". While it is normal to have such a feeling when someone you don't like might be talking to her in a little too friendly manner, you must learn not to get overwhelmed by this feeling, as it only brings people apart and destroys relationships.»
he thinks long and hard about what Zhongli told him, and as you return to Wangshu Inn, you find him on the rooftop, deep in thought.
«I'm back, Xiao.» you say, catching his attention.
you are met by a dry reply, that makes you wonder what might be up with him
after a bit, he decides to confess, and you look at him, endearment in your eyes
«aw, love. you have no need to be jealous. i'm sorry you felt this way. whether adeptus or human, jealousy is a terrible feeling that no one wants to experience. but i can assure you that the only one i love is you, and no one else.»
he's got tears in his eyes
«are you sure?» you nod. «but..my karmic debt..» he averts his eyes, turning his back to you
you hug him from behind, resting your head on his shoulder
«my Vision protects me.»
he makes you promise to run away if he ever loses control over himself, and you reluctantly agree, even though you know that if that ever happened, you would fight for him until the bitter end.
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Kaeya
oh boi, you're in for a ride
he's literally the smoothest talker ever, he doesn't even need to get jealous
he's more of a showoff really, basically showing off his wonderful girlfriend
so it's more him making other people jealous, whether men or women, because, let's be honest, it's not like women are not jealous of you
«all alone here, kitten?» he comes up at you at Angel's Share, while Diluc rolls his eyes at his cheesiness
you flirt right back, twirling a strand of loose hair in your fingers, catching his attention
your hair and neck are his weak points, so you know exactly what you're doing
his eyes are fixated on you, as you let go of your hair, and go back to your drink, ignoring him
he comes up to you, whispering something in your ear
«let's put on a show» are the words that come to your ears, and you smile wickedly
you turn your head towards him, staring at his lips intensively
he's too close for comfort, and you can feel his cold breath on your skin, shivers appearing in response
as you're about to kiss, your lips inches from each other, a suave melody starts playing
you see one of the most renowned bard of Mondstadt, Venti, playing his lyre for the tavern
you get all excited, and stand up, your dress flitting around your figure
Kaeya gives you a puzzled look, but it soon transforms into an amused smile, as he joins you in dancing
you two dance together, the entire tavern mesmerized at the sight of you two
might also be because Kaeya was using his vision to create small snowflakes around both of you, those same snowflakes catching the light of the tavern, creating a reflective spectacle
you decide to tease him, grabbing him by the ring that holds his collar in place
he smiles smugly, as if to ask "what now?"
your faces get too close for comfort, both of you lost in the each other's eyes
suddenly a whiff of wind swirls around you, diffusing an irresistible aroma around you
who's gonna give in first? it's a battle of wits at this point
Kaeya does.
you don't even have the time to process it, that his lips are on yours, and his hands are on your waist, pulling you closer
that was one memorable night
what you didn't know is that your ex was standing in a corner of the tavern, a bewildered look in his eyes as he witnessed the whole scene
Kaeya is a fucking menace
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bellewintersroe · 1 year
Text
Sebastian Vettel x RBDesignEngineer! Reader.
Set in 2013 during the GP, Jennifer is fresh out of uni and has made a name for herself within the F1 world. She joins Redbull-Renault as one of their engineer designers and easily fits into the team, forming friendships easily. Most of all, she captures the attention of three time world champion, Sebastian Vettel. Part 1- just an introduction to the OC and situation, please excuse my inaccuracies about the 2013 GP and design engineering im not a pro and was like 11 back then 😭😭 here’s the LINK to part 2.
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Australia, March 2013…
“And here… right through here is… our youngest, and my personal favourite design engineer. This is where all the magic happens.” The sound of Sebastian’s German accent caused my lips to lift as I took my head set off, spinning around in my chair. Sebastian was walking alongside a camera man, touring around the garages. It was pre practice day, only two more days and the 2013 GP would begin. Although I’d been hired for Red Bull back in October of last year, it had taken 5 months to get to this point of merciless training and shadowing to ensure I was good at what I was doing. The Red Bull driver made his way over, resting on the back of my large chair with an amused smile. “Hi.” I nervously giggled, pushing my hair behind my ear as my headset fell around my neck. “This is Jennifer, do you want to tell them what you’re doing today, Jennifer?” The use of my full, formal name was sending me slightly giggly as I gazed up to the blonde man. Maybe it was just him making me feel that way…
“Um… so, to put it in simple terms so it’s not so boring, we’re just checking all the components of the RB9’s- what Sebastian and Mark will be driving- to make sure we don’t need to make any last minute changes.” “And what’s your name again?” The camera man asked. “Jen, I never go by Jennifer.” I laughed, glancing back up to Sebastian again. Whenever our eyes met I found myself struggling to keep composure on camera. “Tell then a bit about yourself.” He then nudged me on, grinning down. He could tell I was getting flustered, but continued purposefully. “Nobody wants to know about me!” I laughed, attempting to spin my chair back around in embarrassment. Hiding behind my computer for the first two weeks was my safe haven, that’s what I’d reverted back to. “They do!! Tell us, how did you get into your position?!” Seb spun the chair back, sliding a hand down onto my very ticklish shoulder, squeezing as both my shoulders jumped up with a giggle.
“Sorry.” Seb breathlessly laughed. “Um- well I started here in October, I just finished my masters last year at Manchester in Motorsport Engineering- um… Im 22- I don’t really have anything else very interesting to say! Uh- I suppose I had- just had experience from working part time with my brother who’s an engineer when I was like… 15.” I explained.
“Clever girl.” Seb responded as I automatically gulped in response, looking up to him and awkwardly glimpsing back to the camera. I didn’t know how to act with that in my face. “And what’s this?” The camera zoomed closer in on my second screen, it was just information about F1’s plan to go electric next year and use Hybrid engines, but it contained private information. My hand flew up blocking the screen dramatically, “oh! Sorry, that’s a secret!” Seb burst out laughing. “Oh no!” I laughed, “don’t worry I’ll cut that.” Luckily the camera man turned away as I sunk back into my chair. I really hoped I didn’t leak some super, confidential information about Red Bull or I’d be facing the sack a mere half year into employment.
Sebastian flashed me another smile and squeeze on the shoulder before following the camera man and showing him around some more. When they left I let out an internal sigh. I’d known Seb for the same amount as everybody else here, but I just felt this immediate warmth to him. Once the intimidation had worn off (even now I still felt it) I could tell there was an instant attraction. At points it felt mutual, Seb would openly flirt with me, tease me, I know he was a charmer, but I couldn’t tell if I was being delusional or not. He was cuddly, funny, he always looked so deeply into my eyes whenever I explained something to him. I wasn’t sure how I’d deal with the feelings that would keep me on edge for a full season. The worst thing about it??? I had a boyfriend.
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chunniwritesalot · 1 month
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home - nh27
HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!! welcome to my 3rd haas related fanfic 😍😍 i think i should be named the nh27 queen by the amount of ff i'm writing about him (not that im complaining... i want to eat this guy...) if you dont follow me, or check my rambles (go follow me PLEASE... im a desperate gal) you wouldn't know that im going to vacation so i wanted to write something super quick before i left. when i get back- TRUST an smau WILL be made, probably for nico because this man is so beautiful 🤗😋 the writing on this is super rushed but i've been out of practice (uni is starting soon PLEASE SEND HELP) because i major in english and BRO i write so many essays that when i get to break i just stop writing all together. my creative writing is SAUR shit because all i write are analysis's and shit like that BUTTTTT im taking a lot of creative writing courses this year (2) so watch out because i might become Shakespeare cw: sad, cursing, you have a son but your gender isn't included, mentions of crashing (obviously, its about the monaco grand prix), mentions of hate, banner is mine but photos aren't, use of yn, bad writing style
other: y/s/n means your son's name! I DIDN'T EDIT THIS SHIT SORRY FOR GRAMMAR OR SPELLING MISTAKES. MY REQUESTS ARE OPEN IM BEGGING YOU REQUEST wc: 682
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you didn't watch f1 races because of your love for the sport. in reality, you hated the sport. the loudness, the chaos, the danger. you thought that maybe nico would've finally listened to you, he would retire and you two could finally live... peacefully, that you could live your life not fearing the fact that the love of your life could quite literally die almost every week. you watched those stupid fucking races because nico was your husband, and you would never forgive yourself if you weren't watching and something unspeakable happened. so nico promised you that he would always come home to you, and he would never break that promise.
sometimes you wished you never got involved in this stupid sport, because then maybe you wouldn't find yourself sitting in the haas garage with your 3 year old being restrained in your grip as you watch the screen. everything going in slow motion as the two haas cars and the redbull collide in with eachother. was it bad to say you hoped most of the damage went to kevin or checo? you didn't care, f1 made everyone a bad person. you were sure louise, who was glued right next to you, thought the same thing- that most of the damage went to nico or checo. "shit" you muttered, your son looking up at you. he was too young to know what was happening, but you could tell he was worried.
"its okay love, just an accident." you whispered to him, he wriggled out of your grip to go run around the garage. not that you cared, right now, you were focused on nico and lord, were you fucking mad. mad that he broke his promise to you, mad that he never listened, mad at this fucking sport. you hated nico for this, hated that he sacrificed his entire life to this sport, when he knew that he had a 3-year-old son. when he knew you were waiting for him, and you would never forgive him if he didn't come back. you sat there, arms crossed as nico made his way back to the haas area after getting checked with the medics. you watched as he approached you, a flash of guilt on his face. louise seemed to get the message because she quickly got up from the seat next to you and made her way over to the children as she waited for her own husband. "y/n, i'm sorry." nico cracked out quietly, reaching out his hand to take yours. he grimaced when you snapped your hand away and stiffened at his words. "what if you died?" you spat out, "god nico, i-" tears burned in your eyes, "i hate you." nico watched as you stormed to the bathroom, not bothering to follow you. he knew you needed time to cool off. after a while, you came back, sitting next to your husband again. "even y/s/n was fucking worried." you whispered to him, "nico, you-." nico stayed silent, his gaze never tearing from the TV infront of them, he nodded slowly. "i was thinking about you the entire time." he started, "and i'm *sorry*, i'm so fucking sorry." he slowly turned to you, "i-i would never forgive myself if something happened to me, love. i-" he stopped, reaching out to wipe your tears, "i'm... i know you hate this sport, but- its my..." you shook your head, motioning for him to stop. sure, you hated this sport, but you didn't hate nico. you loved nico, and loving him meant you would always be there with him. even if that meant you had to watch all his stupid grands prix. because as much as you knew nico loved his sport, he loved you more, and nico promised he would always come home to you and y/s/n.
"i..i don't hate you" you said back gently, "i'm sorry." nico cracked a smile, "i know, my love. don't be sorry." he reached out again, and this time? you didn't pull away, because nico kept his promise. he was always going to come home to you.
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