#and im not handling it well which i am sorry for but also fuck off im human it happens aksjdjdj

[izzy-b-hands]

im gonna go thru my likes and try to reblog some happy/fun/generally interesting shit to make up for my own shit mood today and the rancid fuckin vibe of this Thursday. might help me, hope it might help any of y'all if ur having a shit day too 🩵💙

[plutoleah]

Rockstar Revelation

Chapter 2

[Male reader-insert, amab, masturbation, reader is mistaken as a woman but doesn't correct anyone. Andrew x Male reader.]

"Andrew I didn't know that you knew how to play the electric guitar. Can you play that again? I think I have some lyrics that can go with that." Y/N smiles while Andrew nods and begins to play the same chords. Y/N waits a few seconds, trying to get into the beat, and then begins singing. "I don't know what I am, but I want you to show me. I don't want to have the capacity to feel lonely. I want you to destroy me, so I'll feel better. I don't wanna leave this moment ever, ever, ever. I wanna leave this world with you. I wanna become something better with you. I wanna fuck our bodies into broken shells. I wanna lose ourselves forever. I wanna put you in my mouth. I wanna crush you in my jaws. I wanna" Y/N stops singing after realizing what she sang and seeing Andrew looking at her.

"Sorry, I got a little into it." Y/N rubs the back of her neck, feeling a little embarrassed. "Wow, that was wow." Andrew's face looks shocked and amazing. He then brings a knuckle to his mouth and starts nervously biting it, a habit he usually has. "What's wrong?" Y/N walked closer to him.

"Nothing," Andrew responded quickly as he backed away from Y/N. "It's just that I was wondering if you want to join me for dinner." Andrew bit down on his finger so hard that blood drew out of it. "Sure, I don't mind; I've only been eating takeout, so it would be nice to eat a home-cooked meal for once," Y/N smiles, trying to reassuring Andrew. "Oh, really?" Andrew sighs out in relief. "Well, um, you know where I live, so um, I'll text you when the food is almost finished." Andrew has to stop himself from jumping up and down. "I'll see you later," Y/N smiles as Andrew walks out.

|When Andrew gets home|

"Ashley, get your ass up and help me cook," Andrew yells as he walks into the shared room. "Can't we just eat takeout?" Ashley groans as she rolls over to look at him. "Where the hell have you been?" Ashley gets up to interrogate her brother. "None of your fucking business," Andrew pushes past her to put down his guitar and then walks to the kitchen. "We have a guest, so help me cook," Andrew says, tying his hair back. "Oh my god, is it another bitch you met and also no slut you've been with liked your cooking, so I don't know what the difference would be now?" Ashley laughs at him, but stops laughing when she sees Andrew coming towards her with a knife.

"For your information, you're the one that always made them spit out the food because you overseasoned it with chili." Andrew traps Ashley against the wall, holding a knife against her neck. "Not my fault; they can't handle a little chili." Ashley wanted to kick and fight her brother, but she was scared he might actually stab her. Andrew then walked away from her to finish cutting the chicken. "So do you want me to-?" Ashley started to speak but got cut off by a glare. She waved him off and went to sit on the couch.

After awhile, the food had finally finished cooking, so he texted Y/N to come over. When Y/N arrived at the house, she rang the doorbell, which Ashley answered due to Andrew being in the bathroom. She eyed Y/N up and down. "So you are?" Ashley looked at Y/N in disgust, even though she knew exactly who was at her door. "Im (stage name), but you can also call me Y/N." Y/N smiled, trying to be as kind as possible. "Hm." She eyed her down again before being pulled by the hair by Andrew to get out of the way.

"Sorry about her, you must've been so hot waiting out here in the heat," Andrew apologized as he let Y/N in. She smiled. "People pleaser," Ashley whispered as she walked to the couch, but almost trips due to Andrew "whore." Andrew then walks towards Y/N and shows her the dining room.

Ashley got up from the couch, practically slitering her body towards the dining table. "You wouldn't want your little sister to starve, would you?" Ashley smiles while sitting next to Y/N. "So what do you like about my brother? Do you like him because of how he looks? Or do you like the way he talks? Or when you're in bed with him. Oh no, wait, its his di-" Ashley gets interrupted in the middle of her sentence due to Andrew kicking her shin. "Shut the fuck up and eat your food." Andrew glares at her. Ashley just glares back.

"Yall two are just the cutest. I used to have fights just like this when I was younger. Y/N completely ignored the context Ashley implied in her rant and ate her food with a smile. Ashley and Andrew just stared at her and then went back to eating. After everyone was done eating, Ashley went into her room while Andrew and Y/N talked. "I had a nice time. I think your sister is nice, just a little weird." Y/N smiled, and Andrew laughed. "Weird is the right word, I guess." Andrew rolled his eyes, recounting the crazy things his sister has done in the past. Y/N then leaned on Andrew and then titled her head up to give him a kiss on the cheek. "Thank's again," Y/N stepped back. "I'll call you when I get home." Y/N smiled and waved as she walked away. Feeling proud, he smiled to himself, doing something so ballsy that he was feeling a little mischievous.

When Y/N got home, he washed up and laid down. Tomorrow was the day he would tell Andrew he was a guy. Or maybe just let him find out. Y/N took out his phone and called Andrew, which he answered after a few rings. "Yeah," Andrew answered. "Just calling to tell you I got home safe." Y/N sounds energetic, while Andrew found himself sounding tired and bored, which Y/N noticed. "Oh, shit did I wake you up?" Y/N apologized. "No, no, it's fine. I'm not even sleepy." Andrew got up from his bed and walked into the living room when he saw Ashley turn and groan.

Andrew and Y/N talked for awhile, so whenever Y/N's voice started to sound more sleepy and sexy to him, he thought he was going crazy and thought he was disgusting for thinking like this, but his body seemed to disagree with him, so when he looked down, he cursed himself. "Andrew you alright, you haven't said anything." Y/N sounds concerned. Andrew responded back quickly to reassure her, but while he was talking to her, he quickly took off his pants, covering the sound with his voice. He knew what he was doing was wrong.

Andrew and Y/N talked for awhile, so whenever Y/N's voice started to sound more sleepy and sexy to him, he thought he was going crazy and thought he was disgusting for thinking like this, but his body seemed to disagree with him, so when he looked down, he cursed himself. "Andrew you alright, you haven't said anything." Y/N sounds concerned. Andrew responded back quickly to reassure her, but while he was talking to her, he quickly took off his pants, covering the sound with his voice. He knew what he was doing was wrong.

As Y/N started talking again, Andrew took his cock into his hand. All he could do was picture Y/N, her soft hands stroking him to completion, and her lips that would kitty lick the head of his cock, teasing him. The tension in his body built as he stroked himself faster as their conversation went on. "And they just kept cheering for me; it felt amazing," Y/N recounted. The sound of her voice was so nice. Andrew could feel it—the heat spreading through his body—but honestly, it went straight to his dick.

In a few quick motions, Andrew was reaching his peak. Andrew shoved his face into the couch and let out muffled moans as he came. Andrew stroked himself until he felt the right amount of sensitivity. He pulled up his pants, instantly regretting what he had just done.

"So, Andrew, do you want to go to the mall with me tomorrow?" Y/N asked while smiling at his phone, hoping to see Andrew outside work again. "Sure," Andrew answered out of breath. After Andrew got off call with Y/N, he went into the bathroom and splashed water on his face as he stared at himself in the mirror. "I can't believe I just fucking did that." Andrew pulled his eyelids down. "And I have to fucking see her tomorrow." Andrew splashed more water on his face, then turned off the faucet, turned off the light in the bathroom, and went to bed with his head in his pillow.

[cringelordofchaos]

craig is so fucking emotionally repressed and afraid of being vulnerable and open about his feelings and bottles them up way too much until he cant handle it and it never gets resolved i love him

he thinks he "is in control of his emotions", but in reality it seems like he's moreso blocking them out or ignoring them, or trying to rationalize the situation. (at least that's what it seems to be the case judging by the fact that's how he tried to help tweek feel better in Put It Down.) But it's literally canon that his primary weakness is communication so its definitely moredifficult for him to express his emotions unless he burts them out (like in his argument with tweek in put it down.)

love his relationship with tweek, it really forces him to confront an important part of life he is shown avoiding - emotions. and by talos it is difficult for him but he's learning.

though at the same time he's overwhelmed and overburdened, since tweek is pretty emotional and sometimes potentially clingy (due to him being naturally insecure of himself and somewhat relying on craig for encouragement), this might be perceived as a threat for craig who's practically afraid of emotions or vulnerability, and probably doesnt know how to manage them the best.

this is best shown (but not resolved) in Buddha Box where Cartman says the buddha box can help him block out anxiety or other people that may overburden him. he begins to talkabout tweek and feeling like hes always asking for his attention. so he just tries blocking everything out instead of confronting this or communicating this to tweek. its pretty interesting how they practically made it canon that he actually struggles with anxiety, despite him being the monotone, deadpan and calm one, especially when compared to tweek. im pretty disappointed they didnt resolve this by the end, but boy am i glad they showed the part of him that struggles as much as others. from what we know, craig is really not that close to many people, or much things, besides stripe, his guinea pig... so given his difficulties with communicating and accepting his feelings accompanied by the fact that he isnt and never was close to that many people, i dont blame him for finding it difficult to exactly manage his relationshiip with tweek, especially as tweek is really emotional himself. and craig does care, a lot, and does want tweek to be happy, and he tries helping him by simply being logical and coming up with solutions, rather than thinking emotionally, but sometimes that's simply not enough. and he does learn that in put it down but sort of starts struggling again in buddha box, except this time instead of learning to be emotinally vulnerable for tweek, he shuts himself off from everyone. though hopefully one day he learns to be more open, because that's pretty important in general but especially in a relationship, i think.

eurghhhh they complete each other so well. they are so different which does prove itself to be an obstacle but also is important for both of them, because they learn soo much from each other. Tweek learned how to be more confident in himself 'in a way he never has before' thanks to craig. and tweek is helping craig learn how to manage emotional relationships and life better and understand emotions in general.

Im not sure where exactly his emotional suppression comes from. It could be due to his family being more closed off. it could be due to him possibly being autistic. it could be due to both. it could be due to neither. but i love him nonetheless.

anyway sorry for small rant. the post was initially just gonna be one sentence but i felt like elaborating on what i meant. i love craig tucker soooo much. he makes me soooo happy.

[kpopscruggles]

body worshipping with kai and (chubby?) reader? :) it could go any way since we know kai isn’t too confident tbh,, would love to see them show e/o how pretty they are

I am so sorry I have been MIA! writers block has been hitting hella hard but im back hopefully!!!!!!!

also this ask got me in a sick mood for kai rn

------------------------------

Right off the bat I can see you two growing confidence together, anytime you need assurance you make sure kai gets it back vise versa. 

The way you comfort kai is something that is sweet and simple but gets kai going. I feel like when kai hears you calling him handsome, pretty, or calling him your man, and you got your hands all over him he’s done. Kai is a physically touch person which I think also interacts with why he has a thing for a chubby s/o. Another thing involving just words is when you tell him how good he fucks you or how he makes you feel like a woman/man. Back to physical touch though, Kai’s favorite. We all have seen he's got muscles; he’s got a sleeper build going. His muscles aren't visible till he uses them, and I think that’s another thing that will have his cock twitching in his pants when you bring it up. He’s got you in a simple missionary, but his cock and thighs are drenched in cum and lube that dripping from the both of you, but his arms...AHHHHHH his arms. Thier stuck to your hips, one running up and down your chest, may gripping the chub from your tummy. Either way you can see the definite muscle in his arms and his hands, how much strength his putting into holding right there and fucking you senseless. The last reason is if he hits it raw, when you're begging for him to cum in you the little breeding bunny thought just pops in his head where it is like “They want MY cum, they want Me to fill the with MY cum. 

Kai praising you is sweet but far from simple, to the point where you may question if you're praising him enough, but he assures you that you're doing amazing things for him. Like said kai is about physical touch and knowing he has insecure moments as well he understands that sometimes words don’t cut it and even if there's a situation where they would, he still doesn't use them often. Due to his insecurities, he’s built a giver personality. You tell him you’re worried about your weight, and he understands that’s his focus. He’s going to show you his strength that you know he has and he’s gonna put you on top of him, holding your chest against his, thrusting up into you, when you build that confidence up enough to get that energy and bounce yourself on his cock that's when he loses it. Feeling your wait come back down on his every time has his cock constantly twitching inside you. He loves doggy too, having you on your hands and knees, watching your body jiggle with every thrust he’s making, especially your ass. He loves the chub cause it's just everywhere. He’s a “Loves chub cause their handles he can hold while he rails you.” And when he’s close and the moment you want him to paint your body in his cum!!!!!! Your chubby tummy with his cum dripping down it and onto the sheets.  

[wildshona]

Electrician Night Out

Home from the club and a cup of tea and then bed or i may just doze through the day. Kast night i was being taked out on a date by Mark, the electrician from the other week; ring on the bell at 8.30 and down i go in the lift to meet him and a nice deep kiss. He has already been drinking. Out o the car and there are three pther guys Kyle, Wills and Jamie who is the designated driver.

off to a Weatherspoonds over the road from the club i have a glass of wine and the guys r on lager except for Jamie. two glasses of wine for me and three pints for the guys and it is off to the club and its student night. Fuck i don't know so most people r about my age and my guys r in their late twenties. i'm with the meture ones (Maybe).

i move to cocktails and the guys have another lager and then dancing. im wearing one of my best clubbin dresses puroke with short skirt and strips of materiak that go up from the waist over my tits, over my shoulders and doen to the waist at the back so there is skin from waist to waist. easy access and if i sit or stand the right way good view of my nips

We do some dancing and Mark is handsy of course he is why wouldnt he be the other guys dancing around me as well and the occasional hand on the arse from Kyle or Wills with Jamie being responsible and keeping a booth table.

Back to the booth and Jamie goes in first with his back to me the other guys standing behind me and im not really paying ayyention when mark pulls me onto his lap guiding me with one hand up my skirt pushing my thong aside and i am straight on to his cock thank gosd i was wet else that would have hurt.

Jamie goes for drinks while Wills and Kyke shiekd me being fucked from the croed especially staff. once he is in Marks hands are on my tits and im bouncing on him facing away from him. he doesnt take long but whispers that he'll yake longer next time.

I need to go and wwipe myself off and so go past Kyle and Wills who give me a good feel on the way past as i go to the toilets to repair the damage. on my way back Jamie passes me heading the other way he stops me and i think ah he's going to cop a feel which he does why wudnt he but also yells in my ear not to drink my cocktail. yeah i get it one of yjose nights and im dissappointed with Mark.

he could have had me for the night and honestly i wouldnt have minded being shared around but i draw the line at drugs inmy drink which accidentally gets spilled as i squueze onto the table amd am pulled down on to Wills. ok I get it and there isnt a lot i can do about it so yeah once again aget fucked and once again im heading for the dance toilets and tell them ill meet them on the dance floor and we dance until i tell them im not feeing well can they take me home

. they arent happy but they aren't going to make ascene in the club so next thing we are in the car and im on Kyle's "lap" and Mark is kussing me and handling my tits and Wills is suggesting we find somewhere to stop.

Jamie is having none of it and drives me home by which time Kyle has finished and as we pull up Wills is turning to maje a grab and Kyle is pushing me over to Mark and just as he is about to pull me on to him there is a knocking on the window. I'd rung Chris from the night club toilets just before we left and he's been waiting downstairs by the lift. A good dad, as far as Mark knew, if an inconvenient one.

I get out and go to the drivers window to give Jamie a kiss and say thank you and he shakes y hand and passes mea piece of paper. which turns out to say sorry and his phone number.

so now Chris has gone to bed and im too zapped and drinking a cup of tea. ive had three loads of cum and the night was boring go figure and i thank Lilith that im not face doen on a bed somewhere drugged while i get tripled.

[bones-of-a-rabbit]

status of babbit's life yeehaw

tl,dr: busy moving and a couple of other big life things that just complicate things, but well on the way to being back to normal! new fic chapters and better quality art coming soon.

tl,wr (too long, will read):

Helloooo what's up its me, Babbit. or Rabbit. or Bones. or Idiot Moron Menace Child, idk im not picky lol

i know a lot of you guys have been wondering wtf is up with my upload schedule lately and the extreme lack of even basic content and also i am extremely aware that i have not updated my fics in a few millennia and for that i am very, very sorry. this post is to answer a few questions you might have, if anyone was curious about the 'reason' instead of just the 'when.'

my family and i have had a hell of a year, y'all. like, jesus christ, i really hope things level out and calm down for a while once we're moved in to our new apartment bc god damn we are so tired. the list goes: 1. we got kicked out of the house we were renting-to-own bc we wouldn't be able to afford the new rate, so they gave us two months to find a new place to live (not long enough, it turns out) and then foreclosed to get us out. 75% of our belongings were still in the house when we had to leave. that includes all of our christmas ornaments- including the ones kept for decades, and the ones made by me and my siblings, and the fancy ones made from blown glass. 2. the first night out of the house, one of our dogs, freaked out by the strangeness of the situation, panicked and slipped her harness and ran off. that was over a year ago. we haven't seen her since. 3. my cat got very ill and became unable to eat. she passed away almost exactly a year ago. she had been 14-15, and had been my baby since i was maybe 8. 4. one of the tires on my dads car blew out. during the night, while it was parked on the curb so he could put the spare on in the morning, one of the in-tact tires was fucking stolen LMAO 5. we applied to rent at so many places and got rejected so, so many times. it costs money to apply, btw. we're talking like $200+. no, u don't get that money back. 6. i lost my job bc knowing i would have to work 8 hours at a job that stresses me out to the point of exhaustion (at a place where no one takes me seriously and would actively laugh at me when i try to express my need to step away for a minute) sometimes paralyzed me and made me sick to my stomach and made me feel unable to leave the house, and i called out one too many times. a day after my birthday, too! 7. just recently, like within the last week, my dad's car got fuckin totalled!!!!!

THE GOOD NEWS IS WE OFFICIALLY, FINALLY, AFTER A SOLID YEAR, HAVE AN APARTMENT!!!!! I'LL HAVE MY OWN ROOM AGAIN!!! THERE'S AN ENTIRE KITCHEN!!!!!!!

the 'oh god' news is we still have to move in, and replace a lot of the stuff that we just couldn't take with us when we moved out (mostly stuff like bookshelves, dining table, dressers, etc) AND get the few things we could cram into a storage center out and moved into the new place, which isn't a lot but at the same time is more than we can realistically handle on our own. and then, we have to get my mums cats (a pair of kitty sisters that we had to temporarily house with my aunt, who got tired of looking after them and let them outside to be outdoor cats a few months ago. yes, this was an extremely shitty thing to do, and we've been working hard to get them back safely) AND my gecko (who my cousin has been looking after, even tho feeding him worms freaks him out LMAO yes i plan on compensating him) moved in, as well... basically oh my god there is so much to worry about but at the same time it's nice to have to worry about it bc it means we're making progress sdkfhsjdkfhdsjfh

basically i am just so tired but so busy and also thinkin abt so much im so sorry for lack of stuff but i am so looking forward to being able to bounce back, pls stick with me, it'll be sorted out soon i think and then i'll hit y'all with some good stuff i promise!!!!!!!

anyway thank u guys i love u and appreciate u all for sticking around

[meggie-moo]

Why this thought still occupies my mind, what other hs fanfictions you'd recommend? You proved to have a very good taste

OKAY IM SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG, but i wanted to make sure it was good!! :D and i had my thoughts sorted lol!! i would definitely recommend looking through the tws of each fic as well! :) but here it is >:)

(i mainly read for rosemary and davekat, but i throw in some other fun ones as well 🕺 i’m also new to homestuck, so i haven’t read that many yet. so most of these are the incredibly popular ones. which are very much popular for a reason!)

davekat:

How to Lose a Lover in 10 Days or Less: A Comprehensive Guide to Becoming a Future Romantic Failure by Wertiyurae (finished)

synopsis: h retelling of the romcom, “how to lose a guy in ten days” karkat has to write an article about how to lose a guy in ten days, and dave has a bet that he can find a guy to take to his sisters wedding. very silly :)

thoughts: there’s so many moments where i was cringing SO HARD. but it’s such a fun time, especially if you like cheesy romcom retellings. like karkat trying desperately to lose dave is so funny 😭 (you will see later that i am a big fan of cheesy romcom stories, so i’m sorry LOL).

Nothingbound by bluberi (unfinished)

synopsis: a retelling of the romcom, “you’ve got mail” karkat is a local bookstore owner, and dave’s brother is a chain bookstore owner, and is moving in across the street. the only solace karkat seems to find is in his online friend, who is actually his enemy all along. angst ensues, drama, enemies to lovers, slowburn etc etc. :D

thoughts: speaking of romcom retellings… this one is unfinished, but the chapters there are so much fun. i adore the art that goes along with it. and just how silly, and angsty it can be. the dave and karkat are SPOT ON. and same with all the other characters. i especially enjoy rosemary, and the ones who work at karkats book store :)

Doc Scratch's School for Supernaturally Gifted Adolescents by medical (finished)

synopsis: humanstuck superhero au. dave and his friends get a mysterious letter to attend a supernatural school.

thoughts: literally in my top three favorite homestuck fics of all time. this is so much more than just a davekat fic, like it’s a *whole* story. there’s also incredibly prominent rosemary, like they are not just shoved to the back. again it’s so thought out, and incredibly tropey. and all the characters are handled so well. it’s so incredibly fanfiction, but in the way where you can’t stop reading it. it’s popular for a reason, and very much deserves that popularity. i’m currently making my friend buddy read this with me <3

A Discussion On The Meteor (finished) (mspfa)

synopsis: short mspa story discussing karkats sexuality. i wanted to throw in a visual one for fun :)

thoughts: very sweet!!

Giving a Sweet Wretched Flying Fuck by strawberrystardust (oneshot)

synopsis: dave and karkat mix some sick beats on the meteor 🕺

thoughts: SO SO CUTE. i will recommend you try literally any fic by strawberrystardust, they are all incredibly, and they are such an amazing writer. please look into the tws for their other fics, but i literally cannot recommend them enough :)

rosemary:

YEAHHH, new couple time 🕺

Love Letters in Digital Ink by tactfulGnostalgic (finished)

synopsis: rose owns a popular occult blog, kanaya is a fan. kanayas family moves in next store, and rose posts about her.

thoughts:

TOP THREE HOMESTUCK FICS AGAIN. this one is SO SILLY, it captures everything about rosemary perfectly. the cringe fail of it all, the rose thinking she’s a therapist but instead just over sharing her family’s issues online. it’s so funny, and well written. and i say this as someone who HATES first person pov in fics. it is done incredibly well. like, this author manages to pull it all off. rose’s blog post are so funny, and it will have you smiling like a fool the whole time. this and doc scratch school, and house of dirk are definitely like fics id want you to read the most out of this list!! :)

Kiss Her You Fool by Paech (oneshot)

synopsis: rose tries to get kanaya to kiss her

thoughts: incredibly cute, i love them so so much. rose lalonde will forever be a mess, and i love that for her <3

courses of action, best and otherwise by MisPronounce_and_MisAccent (oneshot)

synopsis: rose is convinced she’s in a war with dave, of which one is “gayer” to win she fakes dates kanaya.

thoughts: ajdhajhshej, this one is so 😭😭 like vrisrezi is also there and they are all failing, they are all a mess. the synopsis makes it sound more serious, but they are in meteorstuck, and it’s just very very funny LOL

miscellaneous

this is for fics/other fanworks, that are either 1. a couple i haven’t read enough for them to have their own category, 2. stories focused around non-romance!!

if you’re looking into getting into some mspfas, i’d recommend these :) (though i haven’t finished them myself lol!!)

Act 8 (unfinished i’m pretty sure) (mspfa)

synopsis: basically a, “what if” different ending to homestuck. what if, instead of winning, they let their alpha selves win, and they had to stay in paradox space for the time loop? etc

thoughts: i have not finished it, but it’s honestly so well put together. it really gets you feeling bad for characters, like gamzee?? poor little guy etc. the art is amazing, and it really does just feel like a continuation of homestuck!!!

Karkat Goes to a Convention (unfinished?) (mspfa)

synopsis: just like the title says, LOL.

thoughts: i’m not sure if this story is really my jam, that being said, it’s put together WONDERFULLY. like it’s incredibly popular for a reason. you can tell so much work went into it, and just a really big love for homestuck and it’s community. while also being really creative :) (i also haven’t finished this one either, so maybe my thoughts could change!)

House of Dirk by imarriedacherub (unfinished) (visual!)

synopsis: sitcom of dirk and caliborns life as a married couple. and their son/son in law is coming over for dinner. shenanigans ensue

thoughts: OKAY, so i know this is the fic that prompted the ask, lol! which means i’ve already recommended it. but i decided to add it so i could post my thoughts! :D i did not have any feelings towards dirkuu when i first read this, but now whenever i see anything dirkuu i’m like, “omg…the sitcom couple…” ITS JUST SUCH A GOOD FIC. i keep overusing the word incredible in this post, but i will use it again. because this fic really is just *that good*. i made my friend voice act it out with me on call once, and it was very fun LOL. this is my final top 3 in my top three homestuck fics 🕺 again really popular, but popular for a reason. just so much thought went into it, and the execution was perfect.

Trying Something New by strawberrystardust (oneshot) (jaderezi)

synopsis: terezi and jade go on a picnic date! :)

thoughts: have i ever thought about shipping terezi, and jade before? admittedly, no. is this fic absolutely adorable?? yes, very much so!!! literally they both deserve the world, and it’s so cute to seem them interact with each other. again just a very very sweet fic :)

homestuck v2 (mspfa) (ongoing!)

synopsis: different new generation kids!! davekat fanchild comes in and messes up timelines.

thoughts: the art is so good!! i’m really looking forward to where the story goes, and i love the designs. davekat having a child named, “mary-su” is hilarious as it is genius. also babe coelho seems so beloved!!!

—————

i’m sorry this was so long!!! and maybe a tad bit ramble-ly, lol!!! but i hope you enjoy these, because imo they are all very good and fun (i mean i did recommend them, it would be funny if i didn’t think that LOL), like people are so talented and skilled. it’s honestly amazing. everyone who makes fanworks are truly outstanding :) thank you so much for the ask, and again i’m sorry it took so long to answer, but i wanted to be thorough >:)

[la-li-lu-le-lol]

How are you? I havent seen you around in a while, hope you're well out there

Going to be honest, I’m not doing so hot. I’ve been pulled in a lot of different directions with a bunch of awful real life stuff that I am not emotionally equipped to handle. There have been a great deal of miserable interpersonal and health-related family issues that happened this year, and I have been forced into the middle of all of it as a sort of mediator, and I can’t escape from this bc of 300394737 complicated reasons. (hooray for Latinos and our exhaustingly close ties to family! Even worse if you live in a small city where everyone knows your family so you can’t just push them away without huge social consequences and gossip!!! Even worse if you’re legally blind so you can’t drive and jobs are spotty so you can’t MOVE AWAY and ughhhhhh kill meeeeee).

I’ve been writing really fucked up not-MGS fanfics to cope on another account, which I’d prefer not to share. It soothes me greatly to let off steam and use characters as punching bags, though.

I feel a little bad for abandoning this blog after so long of keeping it up, but also *shrug* I can’t really control where my very-limited-and-always-decreasing-as-I-age energy goes. I’m also just using social media less in general as I am kind of tired of it.

once mgs3 delta comes out I hope I will regain enough energy to gush about it a ton on here though. I have been excitedly waiting for that for ages and I hope it will give me some badly needed serotonin. No promises since im shit at keeping those, but hey.

Sorry that this answer was such a huge downer. i really appreciate you checking in and sending this ask, anon, it felt very good to type all that.

[bunnakit]

hellooo i love reading your opinions but im too shy to ask you this off anon so here it is. I’m like you enjoying the sign and loved the direction of the recent ep so I don’t really understand the divisive reactions on tumblr esp since twitter seems to always heap praise on the show. what are your thoughts on how phaya tharn’s relationship has been paced? and how do you think it may be concluded? I saw some people on here being disheartened and expecting a sad ending but I don’t really see that to be the case and I for one have loved their r/s pacing and also the mythology (my main gripe would be some of the way the cases were handled). but what’s your opinion on that and why people here are more divisive about the show? (While all opinions are valid some of the criticism almost feels nitpicky but I would love to hear your thoughts on this!)

QUICK NOTE- ANON SENT THIS BEFORE THIS SATURDAY'S EPISODE, SO THIS ABOUT EPS 1-8 hello love!! sorry it took me a bit to put together my thoughts and feel like my brain was put together and, well, i still haven't accomplished that but i didn't want to leave you on read any longer. also you're ALWAYS welcome to DM me here or discord or wherever! but i totally get being too shy lol despite how i am on the dash i am also very shy

so, i can kind of understand where people are coming from in that there wasn't a lot of courting between phaya and tharn which may make it seem like their relationship was fast tracked. idk, i'm not entirely sure what other people's thoughts are on it, i've kind of just been scrolling past posts that have complained or seemed like they didn't like it. i welcome everyone's opinions but i don't always want to read all of them (and i expect people not to read mine if it's not for them.)

i think it's important to keep in mind that courtship can look different for everyone and while they didn't go on dates, didn't overtly flirt, etc. they've been performing a delicate dance between each other and flirting very much in their own ways (from the hat tugs, the sparring, the attitude.) sometimes flirting is being obnoxious, getting on someone's nerves simply because you know how. half the time my husband flirts with me is my driving me fucking crazy because he's the only person in the world that knows exactly what makes me tick.

i think it also helps to keep in mind the fantasy element here; that wansarut and sakuna live inside tharn and phaya and are drawn towards each other and i think sometimes tharn and phaya's own feelings and attraction have to play catch up. i think some elements of their dynamic were very much both tharn not wanting to get close because of his fears but also not fully realizing the depths of his feelings because they seemingly came out of nowhere (wansarut.)

overall, i've really enjoyed the pacing, enjoyed how they've fallen together through various circumstances, how we've seen tharn's resistance dwindle until he finally had to let himself have the object of his desire. i also think it's a very adult relationship, it's really not all that messy or complicated once you remove the fantasy elements. sometimes desire comes first and love comes later. sometimes things begin physical and end in love.

there is no set roadmap for romance or relationships and to pigeon hole BL couples into a set pattern is a little silly in my opinion. their journey just looks a little different, it doesn't mean they aren't in love. we also have to keep in mind that there's so much going on in this show plot wise that to focus more on romance and courtship would steal time away from other elements that are already struggling to get addressed.

"but doesnt that mean the show is trying to do too much?"

sure, but i'd rather a show strive to do too much than do too little. i love to see the ambition and the passion behind it and even if things aren't concluded perfectly there's so much the sign has done right (addressing that men are also victims of sexual assault, constantly reminding us that tharn - while smaller and seemingly more 'effeminate' - is still every bit as strong and capable as phaya, the continuous reminders that they are a switch partnership, showing us that sex can be goofy and funny with khem and thongtai, etc.) i'd much rather all of this than to watch a show that made me feel nothing at the end of the day and the show has done SO much to educate foreigners on Thai culture. (the copaganda could go tho, we all know i'm an ACAB bitch so i DO have to wear blinders during those scenes lmao)

sorry- i got a wee bit off track. ANYWAY how would i like to see it concluded?

i'm a little torn because there are so many ways i'd be happy. i'd be happy if they finally rid themselves of chalothorn forever and were finally able to be together in peace. (i think everyone's ideal ending)

i'd be happy with a timeline where phaya dies to protect tharn in a reverse parallel of their first life, with a renewed promise.

i'd be happy if they died together and began the cycle once again.

two of these i recognize are HELLA unpopular opinions, but there's really not much this show could do to make me unhappy as long as they stick to the story and the narrative foils they've put in place. i think the only thing i would be unhappy with is if something felt like it came out of left field.

thank you SO much for this ask. i was so flattered i read it out loud to my husband the other day. i'm always SO open to asks like this and really find it so sweet that anyone out there values my opinion at all, i'm just a silly little guy

[shigarakisslutbag]

This isnt directly a request but if you do end up getting inspiration out of this then im glad! (wouldn't complain lol) Imagine how Shiggy would act if some villain with a big loving heart came in and just- somewhat adopted him. Shiggy gets injured? They're there soothing and scolding him. Ranting about video games or heroes? They're patiently listening. Makes my heart so happy negl.

Omg anon I actually really like this idea lol. I have no idea how I would write it as a fic or even organized headcanons BUT I will most certainly give you my disorganized thoughts on this because I have no self control.

APOLOGIES because I'm writing this at 1:33pm and I am very tired (but will likely not sleep until 3am.), THEREFORE, I probably have many typos because I didn't proof read an I am so sorry lol. Anyways, hope you enjoy my thoughts on this, feel free to add anything, I don't mind going back and forth on this topic (this goes for anyone btw! Not just anon. I love hearing everyone's thoughts on concepts I write for)

I feel like in this scenario of reader being a villain, reader's motives are either out of spite towards their hatred for capitalism or they're just kind of... goofy...and unhinged... in a bad way .. thatcopsandheroesdontlike YOU GET THE PICTURE OK? (Use your imagination bestie)

But regaRDLESS, you have a huge soft spot (and maybe some hard spots;) ) for shigaraki.

Which actually just ends up with you having a lot of compassion and care towards him. You can tell he's been through a lot. anyone can. and seeing him having clear struggles in his physical life and internal conflicts, you can't help but want to, well, help him.

I won't go into a huge back story because I simply... am tired LOL. But somewhere along the way shigaraki let you grace him with your presence.

So now you're here with your adopted introverted son and guiding him through his life full of terrorism, tyrants, and genocide 🫶 (you don't quite understand how he's both introverted and a menace to society at the same time. Shigaraki is what happens when an introvert just gets really fed up with capitalism ig)

BUT I DIGRESS

Shigaraki actually really appreciates you're presence. Will he admit it? FUCK NO LMAO. he'd rather twist his eyelids off and eat them before telling your annoying ass he appreciates you. But he does. Just trust me, he does.

Besides spinner, no one really listens to his rants about video games, players, the fall of society. Dabi refers to him as "a cartoon villain on heroin who monologues " shigaraki didn't like that very much

But you listen. You really listen. You ask him questions, you validate his feelings and concerns, you make sure he knows that he's making progress, ect. You don't just hear what he says, you listen. You engage. Which is something he's needed for a very long time.

Especially when he gets injured, is when he gets the most attention from you. Honestly sometimes he wants to hurt himself just hear you cry over him LOL. He's low-key obsessed with you but don't ever bring it up if you notice.

Like the one time he came back to the bar after the U.S.J incident, all bloody with bullets wounds, you were... not handling it well to say the least. Lol. Shigaraki was fine, just chilling on the floor cursing the hero bastards, as he calls them. But you were "dramatic" as shigaraki says. "I'll be fine I'll just stick some bread in bullet holes and cover them with plastic wrap"

???

????!!!!

SHIGARAKI YOU SUPID FUCK

You, much to his dismay, disinfected the wound with alcohol and with kurogiris help stitched up the wounds and wrapped them with a compression bandage and made him rest while checking in every so often to change out his gauze and bandages and cleaning the wounds again.

You also checked in quite a bit to make sure he was hydrated (with water because all the idiot drinks are energy drinks and alcohol)

Going back to listening to his interests, you both share some of the same interests so it helps a lot with your bond with the leader of the league. Even political views.

He listens to you too, even if he doesn't understand some of your interests or is very knowledgeable on certain topics you enjoy, he loves listening to you. He actually thinks your way of speaking and the way your voice sounds is very, very cute. But again, he'll never tell you. He's too embarrassed to and doesn't want to ruin,,,, whatever reputation he thinks he has.

[waylibee-analysis-firm]

mustang theory (ch09)

guys im being so serious rn. im so scared to post this. but bee is being wonderfully supportive (as usual <3) and i am going to be. so very Brave. this may not be coherent, but...i hope it makes some sort of sense ok. anyways here is the theory for ch09:

mike and will leave the camp dance early bc of Bad Memories and/or they would rather just be making out (which is. fair) 

(fearless lore is referenced throughout but also will be theorized/posted about separately) 

this would be proven by the references to wish you were sober by conan gray (yes ik it’s not in relation to ch09 but. this part Could Happen at the end of ch08…just saying). 

this specific theory is fueled by the weird eureka moment i had regarding this post. is this a reach? yes. do i fucking care? no.

they take mike’s car, despite will’s grumblings abt his stupid fucking mustang.

ch01 im staring. Directly at you. shut up. shut up. i hear what you’re saying and i just can’t listen right now okay. ch01 we’ll get back to you i prommy

“Also, God forbid I have to leave the grounds in Mike Wheeler’s stupid fucking Mustang more than once this summer," he adds, nearly spitting. (ch01)

need i say more.

also this would totally be building more on their trust....plus probably some references from follow the sparks that i don't know off the top of my head

also could have been foreshadowed by ch02…when will refused to get into mike’s stupid. fucking. mustang. just saying….

ch02 is also biggest fearless lore references we have that i can think of but that is for another time

“Don’t tell me you’re driving that thing,” Will scoffs, eyeing Mike’s car in trepidation, eyes sweeping along the length of the racing stripes. (ch02)

...forcing Will to declare a lesser of two evils: throwing dignity to the wind and accepting a ride in the Mustang — the undeserving bane of Will’s existence...(ch02)

CAR EMOJI !!!!

this chapter is “thea’s baby”. well thea is also the resident car expert.

im literally so funny for this sorry not sorry im cracking myself up ->

either something happens between them and they end up pulled over OR something happens to the stupid fucking mustang

THIS could be that one post thea made…which could have been totally innocent OR it could have been COMPLETELY SINISTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OUT TO GET US!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! putting on my tinfoil hat

smth happens between them...backseat driver will (mentioned in ch02) as well as the stupid. FUCKING how to drive manual that's been driving me INSANE the past couple of days (found here.)

side note: thea i love you but you are driving me Bonkers (mwah <3)

alternative to the above point is that mike pulls over to 1) make out with will (again. which is again. fair.) 2) chat with will about what they Are

option 2) would require some sort of shift in their relationship/situationship beforehand…im thinking this could mean you know that i caught it could take place BEFORE or DURING ch9… this could be the They Know motif coming to a head (meaning everybody. they Know for real this time. and now mike’s confused about it. “what are we?” talk from ch05 but times a million)

“save me ‘till the party’s over/kiss me in the seat of your rover”

^^ regarding this. i wrote all of this before i rediscovered that wish u were sober has nothing to do with ch09 (supposedly). im just too lazy to change it bear with me please.

will gets mad at mike for some reason?

if the original point made (something happens to the stupid fucking mustang) ends up happening, this could be will’s breaking point bc he’s overwhelmed and panicked and stuff is happening too fast for him

ch09 is a will pov chapter.

also frustrated crier (some ask about ch04 that i need to find to link before this gets posted)…just saying.

will gets mad at mike continued and reverts back to his I Need to Hurt You phase bc it’s safe and he doesn’t know how to handle the UNDOUBTEDLY romantic feelings n thoughts he’s having about mike…

he’s scared of getting hurt again like he was with derek and he’s scared of the unfamiliar territory that comes with being nice to mike/having mike be nice in return

This type of gentleness is certainly a facet of Will that Mike has known, having seen it more than a handful of times over the years, but it’s not quite one he’s accustomed to. (ch06)

this ^^ goes both ways i assume...there's gotta be evidence abt it in a will pov chapter but i am. exhausted.

he lashes out at mike that they aren’t anything, they’re just a casual fwb situationship, etc. 

wow would you look at that…this is paralleling the fearless lore theory…

cue "straight up" by paula abdul for mike pov (i've been a fool before/wouldn't like to get my love caught in the slammin' door/how about some information, please? // straight up now tell me/do you really want to love me forever oh, oh, oh/or am I caught in a hit-and-run?/straight up now tell me/is it gonna be you and me together oh, oh, oh/or are you just having fun?)

“Hit-and-run” CAR IMAGERY ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME

"straight up" by paula abdul is on mike's driving playlist and i've been going insane about it since i saw it. btw. i love this song.

mike's unsure abt what they Are/what will is thinking so he reverts to the childish fighting thing too...pushing will's buttons is second nature for him by this point...evidence for this in a mike pov i will find later prommy

this is also wish you were sober coded “trip down the road, walking you home/you kiss me at your door/pullin’ me close, beg me ‘stay over’/but im over this roller coaster/imma crawl out of the window now/gotten good at saying ‘gotta bounce’/honestly you always let me down/and i know we’re not just hanging out”

first half here. could be about how mike is begging will for a relationship. but will is “over the rollercoaster” and the push and pull of their friendship to rivalry to fwb situation. 

second half here. will’s metaphorically leaving mike (crawling out the window). he’s “gotten good at saying ‘gotta bounce’” bc he’s done this to mike Before when they kissed when they were thirteen…i Think (fearless lore theory). “honestly you always let me down” could be a reference to. will being angry with mike for not just being happy with their fwb, even though he wants more too? “i know we’re not just hanging out” come ON this is will saying he KNOWS THEY CANT JUST BE CASUAL. HE LITERALLY SAYS THIS IN CH05 I BELIEVE. OR MIKE DOES IN CH06. THEY CAN’T BE ANYTHING BUT EACH OTHERS EVERYTHING. 

^^ literally kill me now i can't believe none of this is related. curling up into a little ball and sobbing.

this would be the beginning of the Angst that’s a 3-4 on a scale of 10 bc we know they're both idiots just miscommunicating But. hey.

so that's uh. that's the outline of the Theory we currently have...it's our most fleshed out one rn fs but there are a few Others that were referenced here that we need some more information on...

anyways. thanks for being insane with us. <3

[bluerasbunny]

you know what. fuck it im getting autistic on main

C!DREAM AS JH/ARIAH SONGS. (read under the cut!!)

starting with THE MOST fitting one!!

who's eye is it anyway is so him it is insane. it's so post-vault dream in the imprisoned sam era. 'an eye for an eye'. literally. like literally an eye for an eye i need everyone to hear how much this fits c!dream.

i'd have to paste all the lyrics in i'm not doing that. all of them fit. listen to it you'll see what i mean

THSI ONE. FITS SO WELL.

Is it really a complex or just lacking context? Why would someone go so far to be a walking lie? Yeah, that don't sound like me I don't think I'm that guy (enter beginner's guide)

c!dream being severely misunderstood, lacking in context, a walking lie that he went as far as he possibly could for. you see it right

That I would lose (needed a change of pace) Oh, I would lose Between my left and right, one day I'd have to choose (gone without a chance) He found the man before him had died

first of all these are lyrics from BAD LUCK!! which is the most discduo song ever. second only to want you gone from portal 2.

second of all 'gone without a chance' 'he found the man before him had died' do i even.

the abandonment of himself in the haste of his mission.

Slow down Those words mean nothing My brain just revs up faster Pressure bomb in a goddamn knife fight Ecstatic pathways runaway flood my mind Overstimulation makes me feel like I'm alive

Static that's keeping me up It drives me forward every moment Makes sure I don't stop too long to Smell the flowers I been here too long I might Burn up and explode

I get in the way of myself And it hurts to admit That sometimes I'm unequipped To handle It all on my own But why do it alone It's cause I know I'll never slow down

I'm at the end of my means From idolizing a made-up man Who one day could be me But does version sleep at night Or ever take a minute to just breathe Or Just to be

honestly i can't even. explain this one properly?? like with any evidence for it?? i just think it resembles his psyche and 'guy that is always running around doing SOMETHING' thing

this one is SO discduo. holy shit it is so fucking discduo it is insane how discduo this is.

"You're not like me, I'm not like you I'm not who these things happen to" And that's exactly what you say before they do

tommy. tommy with the 'You're not like me, i'm not like you, i'm not who these things happen to' and the responding line. its so them it is so them OGH

Hand in hand come human error and plain bad luck It seems the timing's always wrong For the ones who wait too long You'll never catch a break you'll have to make your own

'Hand in hand come human error and plain bad luck.' i am. INSANE about corellating this to discduo. tommy is human error dream is plain bad luck. by the way. or it could be the other way around it works either way

That I would lose Oh I would lose Between my left and right, I'd one day have to choose You're not like me, I'm not like you. I'm not who these things happen to And that's exactly what you say before it catches up to you Before you play with knives and find yourself in two You, you, you, you

first point except with the new lines fitting discduo even more. like

I finally climbed to heights I No matter how I try Can't descend Still, somehow they're looking down on me Laughing cause I got what I deserved (You got what you deserved)

And I would do it again I'm not sorry but thank you For enduring me As long as you did That's more than I'd ever ask of you

LIKE. DO I EVEN. HELLO? HELLO. HELLO??? YOU SEE THIS RIGHT.

that final part is LITERALYL the discduo finale like. it is insane. it is insane

okay. hear me out. manhunt energy, yes, but ALSO.

Before I knew I'd live to Savor this day I'm taking off To my own grave I'm running away

So watch me disappear before your eyes And catch me if you can

Catch me, catch me, misplace and mismatch me Tie your shoes in knots but you’ll never harass me Find me, find me, I dare you to try I’ll bet on my survival But now you’re gonna die out there

Where could I be? Walking among you or inside your own homes? Or perhaps there's a part of me in all of you. (Hahaha!)

i cant even explain my thought process with this one i just need you guys to match my brainwaves honestly. like you get me (probably)

So catch me if you can Catch me if you dare Venture through the foul and you'll see what's fair Catch me if you can Catch me if you dare You'll find me through the fog and the filthy air

'Venture through the foul and you'll see what's fair' SNAKES DON'T JUST BITE.

Another grave for the digger with the crimson blade I ain't a saint or a sinner I'm the ghost you made

I fucking dare you, You wouldn't know a good hook if it impaled you That chorus isn't yours, eighty-five is for the label So are you able to take the blame, As a pawn to the winner of a losing game?

FUCKING. DISC DUO. IT'S DISC DUO MAN. I MEAN COME ON THAT LAST LYRIC. I AM DERANGED

im going to gain a reputation as the guy that tags c!dream to songs and then does the worlds worst attempts at analysis posts on them and well maybe im okay with that

[meatriarch]

overview cont. i guess lmao. no one asked but its been something in the back of my mind for a while now & i got an anon tonight telling me i come off intimidating and i feel the need to just. make note of some things so that hopefully if anyone feels a certain way with how i run this blog then like. know and understand both my side as well as that my dms / disc is open for anyone to pop into -- just obv depends on the headspace at the time.

i know this is long & am sorry if it doesnt make sense but. just setting it gently out there.

but, again, my disc ( same as my url ) is open for any mutual. its open to shoot the shit. open for plotting. open for memes. what have you. i may not always get to every message. i may not be in the headspace for certain things or certain energies. but its open for anyone as long as we are mutuals & if handles are different between here & disc then i just get a heads-up abt who you are so i know lmao

likewise, i am fairly fucking slow writing-wise and alot of that is because of offsite issues chipping into me but also because most, if not all, of the things i DO have in the inbox or drafts are from my affiliates at this time ( tho i do have some more from the archive i need to move over from a couple people ). alot of my spoons and drive to write and post is because of the dynamics and plotting built between our muses. im not a blog centered on plotting but, it does help to have a better idea on how to navigate between muses c: esp for those technically outside of my kiddos' texas canon obviously. that being said, anyone is welcome to like any inbox calls i put out there. and my inbox is always open and accepting, even if i havent reblogged prompts in a while -- i have my tag linked on my pinned and its available always & for whomever. it just comes with the understanding that i may take a while to respond to them & they may not get as expansive as some of my posts can get with my affiliates; which again, is just simply from how much we've been building together that helps with that!

on that note. my connections with my texas pals are very dear to me. both ic & ooc. as i noted in my overview post, i talk about the dynamics we've built openly and freely here because theyre so integral to my portrayals. they & their kiddos have my entire heart and i unapologetically love having fun with them and going on tangents with them and bouncing thoughts off of each others posts on the dash.

my experiences in other corners of tumby rp have not been particularly kind. and its been a long time since ive felt comfortable especially ooc with writing partners. and i understand if i may come across closed off or intimidating or unapproachable. i understand if i also come across partial to them / play favorites because frankly... i am. i do. thats because they've built bonds not just between characters but also with me. ill be very transparent and say that i am very particular in who i get close with and that translates into here too. but thats also just something that easily can also happen with literally anyone. again i do understand if i come across closed off in any sense but genuinely? im not scary and i have options open for continuing to grow more connections with people c: theyre open always. what im not going to do, however, purely out of personal experience is chase after interactions. the last fandoms i wrote in i did so and it wore me down into my last hiatus. i will show equal enthusiasm to whats given. but i wont fish for it, either. its just not my cup of tea.

i like to think im fairly patient and understanding in a lot, probably moreso than i should in some cases -- sincerely though if theres issues know that im fine with it being brought up. but im also not going to be welcoming nor tolerate my boundaries being disregarded or disrespected, im already dealing with that with an offsite friend. not dealing with it here. i do not like feeling so uncomfortable existing on my own blog or in my own disc. and i get that already with my personal disc & this offsite friend in particular. im not dealing with it here too.

which on that note, i also wont be receptive with issues regarding what i post, what i talk about, who i write with, who i choose as affiliates or mains or w/e. my blog & my dash are my safe & comfort zones and these muses often help me alot with navigating when my headspace is at a fucked up level. if any of that is a concern yes youre welcome to come to me and talk it over but end of the day? my comfort & mental state is a priority to me. if thats ever an issue i truly would just recommend you do what you feel is best for you. everyone existing on this hell-plane are entitled on curating their space in whatever manner they see fit.

again. i promise im not scary. im not an ass. but i do curate my space to be in my best interest and at my age & experience across the 10+ yrs ive been rping on and off here, ive seen alot, heard alot, experienced alot. i do apologize however if i do come across unapproachable or intimidating. i do apologize if i seem closed off to only a select few. i dont mind if you follow / we're mutuals solely just to keep up with what i write! thats completely okay too and i thank those who are <3 but if i seem unapproachable i literally just gently gesture again to my disc or prompts tag etc! i welcome any to get to know myself or my muses. regardless of how much time has passed since following one another. just again, comes with the understanding that my social battery & headspace often does work against me. and thats not personal against anyone, ever.

[starjxsung]

hi angel <3

how are you doing? you’re so strong, you know that right? i’m so sorry to hear what happened to you. humanity keeps cementing itself as the worst species. not wanting to write about men is so understandable and please don’t force yourself to do so until you feel comfortable with it. anyone with empathy will understand the trauma that comes with having to go through something like that. take as much time as you need to heal. i send you the absolute biggest hug and my undying support.

i’m so honored that you think of me when you see kitties😭 that is all i want in life🥹

did you watch the kitten video?🥹🥹 i was so distracted with the kittens that i don’t remember anything they said but i’ll watch it a million more times😻

my bank cannot handle another comeback + tour🥲 im struggling as it is wtf jyp </3 im so excited for lolla, we’re staying for like a week and are working on the logistics for our non-festival days. it’ll be so fun. im also listening to a lot of chappell roan lately too, im really pumped to see her. i am so with you @ the barricade at every concert you go to (real) <33

if you get around watching the kdramas someday, imma need your review <3 and nana!! i love that, a nana keychain sounds so cute🥹 i finished it already (im bedrotting 4 summer rn) and i read the manga too and it’s so sad but so beautiful so i def recommend you watch/read it someday!

and for the kittens, the baby with the RI is doing so much better in just a few days with antibiotics <3 once its eyes are fully opened and healed, i shall send pics!

ily angel <3 you’re the sweetest person ever to exist. remember to rest, eat and stay hydrated! take care, always <3 sending you hugs!

-🐈‍⬛

HI MY BABY ANGELLLL I’VE MISSED YOU 🥹🫶🫶🫶🫶 I love you so very dearly. It’s been so frustrating getting through the days lately. But I’m doing my best ! The neighborhood was very supportive of it when I called the police and posted about it publicly which helped a lot <3 and I’m staying off my phone for the most part which makes things feel a little less stressful. Sending you all the hugs in the world, I love you so so much and I hope you’re doing absolutely amazing as well 🫶❤️🥹

STOPPPP the amount of times I’ve watched the kitten video 😭 I wasn’t expecting Channie to be so good with them???? Also forever laughing at Felix and Jisung trying to handle the kittens LOL the way they were clawing at their knees is exactly what momo does when she gets really excited and even though it’s adorable it can really leave a mark if her nails are long 😭 that being said, Chan needs a kitten. Somebody get him a kitten

I can’t believe we’re at like!!! One month until Lolla!!!!! We’re making all our plans too and it’s honestly nerve-wracking but I’m soooo fucking ready to see skz again ahh it’s been so long since I saw ot8 together and I’m stoked we’re probably getting new songs! I already preordered the new album (rip my wallet 💔😀) and my bank acc is HURTINGGGG….. everybody remind me not to spend anything until Lolla (impossible)

I will absolutely let you know what I think about the kdramas if I get around to them!!! I’ve been rewatching Kingdom these days and after that’s done I’ll be in dire need of bedrotting content again <3

Also soooo happy little RI kitten is doing better!!!! I forgot I referred to it originally as RI kitten so I just stared at my phone for a whole minute thinking “Rhode Island kitten???” LOL so glad little kitty’s doing amazing though 🥹❤️

Sending you all my love sweet angel I hope the summer days are good to you 💓🫶❤️💝💘💞👼 also here’s my latest pc & holder I’ve been obsessed with…. Jun Han from xdinary heroes if you’re reading this I love u

[jyndor]

im the anon you told to fuck off here to say thank you.

i had read about terrorist organizations using that slogan and i had a gut reaction. im a jew and i fear for both muslims and jews with everything that is going on right now. because i read what you wrote and i researched again and i see where propaganda got the better of me (even if those words have been used by terrorists). and i see time and time again where propaganda gets the better of most of us on something as fast paced as the internet.

as i read i remembered. the naz*s took a symbol that was once peaceful and turned it into something the world cannot look at the same way ever again-entirely their fault not the fault of the original culture from which the symbol came.

i dont want to see that happen with words that are truly important and stand for something i do believe in which to be clear: is a free and peaceful palestine where no one has to live in fear.

in saying what i did based off of a gut reaction i made a mistake. i did the same thing i hate from others on the internet which is speaking on an issue before doing further research and i am ashamed of that.

but i am also committed to learning and doing better tomorrow. no one can become an expert in any part of this as quickly as plenty have claimed to. im writing this to share my perspective and as a reminder of fallibility for whatever that is worth.

i think its important for ensuring we dont become what we wish to stand against.

thanks again for sharing your research. you told me to fuck off but ill sign off by wishing you well

anon I'm shook no okay so hold! on the fucking off pls do not fuck off I recant the fucking off. its how I handle anons (I'll explain later) until yall prove you're not trolling or bots or whatever.

it's worth a LOT. like really it's worth a lot. Unfuck off, I would love more people in my orbit who don't just critically engage with criticism but also go on to look into it for themselves. instead of just taking my or someone else's word for it. I try to do that myself because I can be such a fucknugget and sometimes need a good smack lol.

I just want to say I'm sorry that you're experiencing the fear you're experiencing. and um I have jewish cousins and family who I am scared for always, I try not to bring them up bc it feels kind of gross in this context but yeah, I don't want to invalidate your fears.

I mean what the n*zis did with that symbol is a whole other thing and I don't feel like I should speak on it other than to say fuck n*zis they ruin everything they touch. I liken this more to the way that black lives matter gets misconstrued because I know more about the history of that phrase than I do about that symbol you're talking about. I also don't like to bring up n*zism in the context of israel/palestine because actually almost every time I have seen that comparison with israel, it is a cheap shot at jewish people. Like in a youtube comments section or something, not thoughtful discourse - because tbh these are very, very different situations and the comparisons could be made of almost any other genocide, but like the commenter knows it's a painful thing for jewish people and so like I said, it's a cheap shot that's easy to take and says more about them than it does about palestinian liberation or israeli apartheid.

I know plenty of anti-zionist jewish people do actually talk about the shoah in the context of why they support palestinian rights but for me it just doesn't feel right.

and yeah i understand falling for shit - I've done it, it's easy as hell to read something and feel like it's right, like yeah I personally don't actually say from the river to the sea all that often, you won't find it as a tag on my blog because I think it's best coming from palestinians?

you're totally right - no one can possibly learn the history quickly. It's taken me 16 years to feel like I am actually relatively well versed in the history and I'm not even well versed, I'm just decently versed lol. and if you add into it the propaganda that we've all been told for years, and then the added generational trauma you have? of course it's hard to fight gut reactions because often they're somewhat based in experiences we've had or others have had.

the reason I told you as an anon to fuck off is because of my history and views towards anonymous asks more than anything else, btw. THAT is a gut reaction but it is also informed by my experiences. I hope this maybe explains why I may sometimes come off a little harsh towards anons (and why I decided to turn them off - until rebelcaptain secret santa forced me to open them back up lol).

so I used to love to keep anonymous on because I know that a lot of people don't feel comfortable reaching out for a number of reasons and I wanted to remain accessible as a user of this shithole site lol. however what happens is sometimes, a lot of times, people will just be saying anything. and then they'll say "I'm an x person and y is true" and often people getting those anons will be really well-meaning and just accept it at face value. because genuinely so many people want to be on the side of marginalized groups and want to be good allies. and so shitty people will just be saying bullshit about whatever, and people who may not understand the details of whatever situation anon is talking about will say, "oh shit I didn't realize that! Thanks for educating me!"

and often it is legit! and it's also important to remember that no group is monolithic, so if an anon comes into my ask box saying that they are from, idk let's say, venezuela. i don't know a whole lot about venezuela. I know there is a lot of propaganda and shit from the us, and I know that there are class dynamics and racial dynamics that I vaguely understand because I have a relatively okay understanding of the entire region but it's not good enough to hold up more than a little bit under any kind of actual pressure like being told something by someone who claims to be venezuelan and says that everyone is actually indigenous (which i do understand to be indigenous erasure), and so it would be more comfortable for me to just say, "okay thanks for the info, my bad!" etc etc etc which... okay but like what if they're not venezuelan? what if they are and they're actually just anti-indigenous? what if they're a right-winger or a bot or idk just wrong lol. some people can be just incorrect without it being disinformation, right? so if I post that without any pushback or skepticism, I'm now spreading misinformation that is used to harm indigenous people.

so for me, because anons necessarily get to hide their identities more than even these already relatively anonymous social media accounts do, my policy has always been to handle them with skepticism and frankly to assume the worst.

not everyone does that and also like I don't have a big following but I don't have a TINY following either so I do feel some responsibility to provide accurate information. and that's just from years of experience and not always doing that lol.

anyway sorry for being long-winded, and thank you for reading what I wrote and more importantly for not just taking what I said at face value but for doing the research yourself. that's what is most important.

[watchoutforthefanfics]

achievement unlocked 🔓 (part eleven) || Streamer AU! Reddie (IT)

Part 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10

AVAILABLE ON AO3

Inspiration: this prompt + BIRDS OF A FEATHER by Billie Eilish

Summary: Richie liked to play video games, and by some stroke of luck, it became his job. Being primarily known as Trashmouth on stream, he found his own little group of streamer friends and they became intertwined: The Losers Club. It never did feel quite complete, though. Well, until, he got his very own backseat gamer in chat.

TWs: innuendos, lots of talk of sex (it's Richie), cursing, brief mention of toxic relationships, and shameless flirting.

[[A/N: The Aftermath !!! Also am I angry that Chris Pratt voiced both Mario and Garfield??? Yes I am, and I think Im allowed to be. Enjoy :))]]

Richie Tozier is not a coward. Not really.

He's impulsive (brave some say) and just does shit. Which is why he was here, staring at his phone. Staring at the three words he hadn't necessarily wanted to say but couldn't stop himself. It just... He just always did stupid shit.

And then his phone lit up.

e.kaspbrak

What

Richie Tozier is not a coward. But sometimes shit was scary, and sometimes you run away.

So, without another word, Richie muted his phone and slid it onto his nightstand. He stared at his phone guiltily for just a spare few seconds, before slipping off his glasses and rolling over to his other side. Promptly ignoring the way the ceiling lit up, knowing that it meant he was distinctly ignoring messages from... Eddie. His Eddie. Eds.

He'd deal with it in the morning. He just needed a night, yeah, a night.

And maybe a morning.

He stared at his phone with too early tired eyes, got up, made some frozen waffles, sat down, ate them, and stared at it some more. Fidgetted with his hands, he debated looking at the messages. (Would there be calls, texts? Would Eddie try and get everyone else to harass him too? Would he tell them what had happened? That Richie had just... said that shit. And... And ran away?) Instead, he spun on his heel and busied himself with his comics or maybe his figurines (or maybe both. Probably both).

It doesn't distract him though, not really. It was in the tap of his foot, or the flex of his hand. He was almost completely panicking, but at the same time, there was no fucking way he could look at what Eddie had sent him. It just wasn't... He didn't want for it to come out this way-

Richie was currently on his couch (it was way past lunchtime at this point, he'd been ignoring his phone for hours), death glaring his bedroom door. His eyes set somewhat to the location of his phone, like he could maybe erase the problem if he stared at it hard enough.

Because of course, after Eddie made this genuine speech about wanting Richie. Only wanting him, and all his fucked up pieces. He'd give him another reason not to.

He knows that not all the options are bad, in terms of Eddie's response, but the bad ones are so fucking scary. Richie was in love with him, how was he supposed to handle (potentially) scaring Eddie away? Or maybe he thought he was just moving too fast? Or maybe Eddie just didn't see it that way yet-

Richie threw his head back on the cushion, groaning. This is going fucking nowhere. You're only making it worse.

Maybe Eddie was good with the whole 'in love with him' thing, but now, you've ignored him for hours. He could be fucking pissed. And what the hell could you do about it? Say sorry?

God, he was so fucked. There was no good fucking outcome from this. Trashmouth Tozier is fucking at it again, ruining hi-

There was a knock at the door. Well, if he was honest more like a bang, it was a pretty hearty fucking knock actually. So much so, that Richie almost didn't go move to see who it was. Who the fuck could it be?

Wait.

"Richard fucking Tozier-"

That was one Beverly Marsh. An angry Beverly Marsh.

She got the kind of mad that was all internal, all glares and frowns and just fucking... like you'd brought home a failed test. ("I'm not mad, I'm just disappointed.") Bev was a good friend, a fiercely good friend who knew how to call Richie out on his shit. And god, did she have something to call him out on now-

"Richie," she leveled, maybe a little concerned, "-I'm so serious. Open this fucking door."

He might as well bite the bullet, yeah?

With the drag of his feet, Richie pursed his lips and pulled open the door. He was met with a new type of Bev.

She looked particularly ruffled, if he was fucking honest, and her lips pulled into a tight frown. A frown that he distantly recognized... maybe once. And her eyes? Fucking cold blue steel.

"What the fuck-" she pointed a finger into his chest, "-did you do?"

Richie blinked.

"Eddie has been texting me nonstop about you, that you're not answering him, so I-" she stressed it out, pressing her finger into his chest -it stung a little, "-called you and got the same shit. I called you five times in a row-"

"Bev-" he tried, but she only moved forward.

"-and you didn't answer. I was so worried, Rich, and I can't imagine how Eddie felt all the way in New York-"

"Bev-"

"-And I get here, and you're perfectly fine. So that means something is wrong, and that means that you did something, Richie. So, what did you do?"

Richie gnawed at his lip -reluctantly, closing and locking the door, before questioning, "Eddie didn't tell you?"

Bev's mouth flattened into a straight line, eyes turning somehow fucking colder, "Richie."

"Look, Bev, I just... I fucking panicked, okay-" Richie scrambled a little bit -anxiety in his stomach snapping, "-I didn't mean for it to go on all day-"

"What did you do?" Bev repeated, stern.

"-I just... I don't know, I freaked out. And I needed a minute, I guess-"

"Richie," she tried again, this time grabbing his face -setting his eyes to hers, "-I swear to god I will get Stan to fly his ass here from Atlanta, if you don't tell me what the fuck is going on."

Shit, those were the big guns. Stanley cannot know about this, it would fucking disappoint Patty so much. And Richie could never fucking disappoint Patty-

It burst out of Richie just like it did the night before -rushed and impulsive.

"I told Eddie I loved him."

Bev paused, eyes softening and eyebrows pulled together -confused, "Eddie told you that he loved you, and you ran away?"

"No, I-" Richie let out a heavy breath, clarifying, "-I told Eddie that I loved him, and I ran away.

Beverly scrunched up her nose, dropping her hands from his face (all he could read was confusion), "What?"

Richie furrowed his eyebrows, "What do you mean what?"

"Well," she let out a sigh, "-normally, when someone runs away after a love confession, it's not the one who confessed, Richie."

Richie pursed his lips, what's that supposed to mean?

"Wait," Bev deflected, grabbing her phone, "-shit. Eddie's probably freaked the fuck out right now."

Richie's stomach twisted, bile rising up his throat, "This is exactly what I wanted to avoid, Bevvy. I fucking knew it was too much-"

"Shut up," she raised a finger to his mouth, silencing him, "-That's not what I'm talking about."

"Then, what-"

"Eddie is probably worried about you," she clarified, flicking his nose, "-because, you overthink things. And you didn't even hear him out-"

"I saw his message after," Richie reasoned, maybe a little for his own conscience, "-he just said 'what'. I mean, how was I fucking supposed to take that-"

"Knowing you, Rich," Bev pointed out, carefully, "-you probably said it out of nowhere. So, I give him a pass about being shocked."

"Well, I just thought-" Richie tried, but his side didn't really seem to make sense anymore.

"No," she shook her head, "-no more thinking. Go answer your phone."

"But," Richie decidedly didn't move, "-what if-"

"Richie," she glared, hands smoothing down his shoulders, "-you don't know shit until you see it for yourself. So, for the love of all that is holy, go fucking answer your boyfriend."

Richie pursed his lips, hesitant to take any steps anywhere. He was so fucking scared-

"You know he's probably stressed the fuck out about this," she commented, accusing, "-about you."

Richie frowned. Eddie was probably fucking scared too, had been all night. Fuck-

"I don't want him to be stressed out, fuck-" he breathed out, burying his head in his hands, "-God, I'm so fucking stupid."

"Hey," Bev softened, moving to pull his head down to her shoulder, wrapping him into a hug, "-I think... I think Eddie knows that you were scared. That's why he's losing his shit-"

Richie breathed in her Bev smell (it was a more like feminine smell with a hint of a masculine musk, like a flower just after some rain), and leaned forward into her. It was kinda what he needed, maybe for the past few days. He just needed a fucking hug.

"-because you're scared, and he can't help you."

Fuck.

Richie let out a shaky breath, heart racing in his chest, "Fuck, Bevvy, what if I... What if I fucked it all up? What if he never even-"

"What did I say?" Bev pulled back, leveling his face to match hers, "-No more fucking thinking. You want answers? Go ask Eddie. It helps no one to speculate shit."

"I know, but-"

"No buts, Richie," she shoved him toward the direction of his bedroom, "-go answer your fucking boyfriend, and figure this shit out."

Richie turned back toward her.

"Like now," Bev snapped, pointing toward the door.

Richie smiled at her, a little tight (but to be fair, his anxiety was through the fucking roof), "Thanks, Red."

She lightened slightly, smiling back and stepping toward the door, "Tell me how it all goes. I love you, Rich, but don't test me again though, seriously-"

Richie near immediately chimed back, actually smiling, "Love you too, Bev."

She rolled her eyes and motioned him through the door further -eyes glinting in a way he didn't want to test. Richie obediently did so.

That brought him to now, staring at his nightstand and that dreaded fucking phone.

It was just as overwhelming as it was the first time, staring it down and not quite being able to grab it. Like he physically couldn't. Like everything in his body was fighting it. But, now, now there was something else in his mind.

Eddie, in his tiny apartment, clutching his shirt like he always did when he was anxious and tapping his foot so much that it shook the coffee table. Big brown eyes staring at his phone like it could get up and walk away. Like if he looked away it would disappear and he really didn't want it to disappear. Richie remembered when his breaths would get so fast, and he'd talk himself up-

Richie didn't hesitate to grab his phone.

He was confronted with a growing list of notifications, spanning from a range throughout the night. Missed calls and texts every hour or so. Had he even slept last night? He thumbed through the notifications, calculating the time difference in his head.

Richie frowned again, No. He did not. Or at least, not more than like an hour.

God, Eddie-

His hands moved to Instagram, instinctively. Throughout a slew of missed calls (and videochats), there were just a few messages.

e.kaspbrak

What

[missed call from e.kaspbrak (x2)]

Richie, answer your phone, dickweed.

[missed call from e.kaspbrak]

Rich, seriously, this isn't funny.

I know you didn't just fall asleep in two seconds.

[missed call from e.kaspbrak]

Richie, you're freaking me the fuck out.

If this is some sort of joke, I'm going to be so pissed.

[missed call from e.kaspbrak (x3)]

Come on, Richie. This isn't fucking funny.

[missed call from e.kaspbrak]

Are you okay?

[missed call from e.kaspbrak (x4)]

Richie felt like fucking vomiting. He didn't text any after that one, it was all calls. Just call after call. God, he was such a dumbass. Eddie was up all night, fucking paranoid. Because what? Richie was scared of rejection? That he wasn't even sure he'd get from Eddie. It was so fucking selfish, and he felt like shit.

He wasn't gonna make him wait anymore.

trashmouth.tozier ✔️

hey eds I'm sorry I didn't respond

I was really fucking scared and I didn't want you to end things and I just panicked

and I'm sorry

If you don't want to talk to me, I get it

Richie let a breath in through his nose and out his mouth. He wasn't sure if he should even expect a response at this point. Maybe he was sleeping, which would be good, actually so-

e.kaspbrak is calling

He was scared as fuck, but there was no way in hell he wasn't answering it. Not after all the calls he missed already. So, with a breath, he accepted and pulled it up to his ear.

It was silent for a second, so Richie spoke instead. Eddie had done enough already, anyway.

"Eds?"

There was a shuffling, and Richie held his breath.

"Look, I am unbelievably fucking mad at you right now," his voice echoed through the line, and it was a little shaky and too fast, "-but I can't fucking articulate that properly because I'm so fucking happy to hear your stupid ass voice."

"I'm really happy to hear you too, Eds," Richie laughed a little, eyes a little teary, "-And you should, you should be mad at me, I'm a fucking idiot-"

"Did you mean it?" He interrupted, and he was definitely sniffling.

Richie flexed his hands once, hearing Eddie cry because of him made him want to throw himself off the nearest bridge. Or maybe book the next flight, and hug him until he physically couldn't anymore.

"Mean what, Eds?" Richie asked, gently.

"Do you actually love me?"

Richie's heart twisted in his chest (he didn't think I meant it?), "Yes, yeah. Of course, I fucking love you. What do you mean?"

"I was-" Eddie started, before clearing his throat, "-I thought it might've been a stupid joke, I don't-"

"What?" Richie whispered, "-No, I know I'm a fucking idiot sometimes, but I wouldn't... I wouldn't do that."

"Well, I just-" Eddie let out a breath, and it was much slower (Richie hoped it was somehow because of him), "-I don't know. I just got fucking scared. And then you weren't responding. And I thought that you might think I didn't-"

"I'm so fucking sorry, Eds," Richie interrupted, "-I fucking hate myself because of this whole thing. I love you, and I just stressed you out, what kinda bo-"

"Don't fucking say that," Eddie hissed out, "-I am mad as shit at you, but you're still you, Richie. You're my boyfriend, you can't shit on yourself. Because if you were anyone else, I would beat the shit out of you."

Richie barked out a laugh, loud and sharp. He heard Eddie laugh a little too, like he couldn't help it. It made something stir in his stomach, and it just slipped out.

"God," he spoke through laughter, "-I fucking love you, Eds. You're such a little shit."

Eddie's laugh got louder, it might have even changed to a giggle if he was honest. It made Richie fucking giddy; I love you, Eds, love, love, love-

Richie's mouth opened, and he just let him say what he wanted to. Eddie already had his dramatic confession, it was his turn anyway.

"Eds, I really fucking love you," he spoke, tone genuine and he was smiling (Eddie wasn't running away), "-and I know I talk a lot of shit. But this... I'm being honest. There's no fucking shitty joke. I feel like I've been in love with you my whole life-"

"Richie," Eddie breathed out, but it was a little shaky and quiet (maybe like he was crying).

"-which I don't know how that fucking works, because we've only known each other for months so-"

"Richie," he tried again.

"-but it feels like that. It does. Like Richie Tozier is supposed to love Eddie Kaspbrak. Like it's the fucking Earth turning-"

"Richie-"

"-and every time you talk, it just rings through my head. Because you're so... you. And I love the fuck out of you. So, when you said all that shit to... to reassure me, and then you were just... Eddie telling me that you were pissed off at them, on my behalf, and I just... I couldn't fucking stop it."

He took in a big breath, but he wasn't scared. Eddie deserved to fucking hear it. Even if he didn't love him back, right now, he'd still tell him everyday. Until he died, probably. Even if they broke up (which the thought made Richie want to shrivel up and die), his last words would be: I love you, Eddie Kaspbrak-

"You're making it really fucking hard to hate you, right now," Eddie spoke, in what Richie knew to be frustration (the kind where he puffed up his cheeks a little).

Richie laughed, shuffling his feet a little (like he had energy he couldn't let out which he always fucking did), "I try."

Eddie brought on this whole new side of himself like he couldn't stop fucking smiling and he fucking loved someone. And god, he had never loved someone like he loved Eddie, or maybe never loved at all-

"I wanna say-"

Richie somehow immediately knew where it was going, "Eds, you don't have to say anything. Seriously. If you're not ready, there's no rush. I'll fucking be here as long as you need me to be."

"Richie," Eddie leveled, "-that is sweet as fuck. Probably the sweetest thing you're fucking capable of saying. But I need you to listen to me-"

"I dunno Eddie baby," Richie teased, "-I could go sweeter."

"Richie," Eddie tried to say seriously, but he was laughing through it, "-shut the fuck up."

Richie politely cut it back. He could always tease him until he nearly blew a blood vessel later (it was kinda his favorite thing to do, honestly). Preferably on a video call, so he could see the red go all the way up his face-

"I think I want to come earlier."

Richie nearly dropped his fucking phone, "What?"

Eddie continued, almost bashfully (Richie added the new tone to one of his Eddie files), "I hate New York. The people here suck, the streets are loud, the whole place smells so fucking bad-"

Richie snorted.

"-and you're just in San Francisco, fucking waiting. For what? For money I can't even get to? I mean, it's practically fucking invisible-"

Richie was smiling way too big for his face.

"-and I'm just fucking sitting here in a shitty apartment because I already paid rent. And you, my boyfriend who fucking loves me, are across the fucking country in a fancy ass apartment-"

"I wouldn't call it fancy, Spaghetti," Richie interrupted, going into a 'fancy' accent, "-It's not like butlers are waiting on me, or there are fucking... marble floors. It's just got a nice kitchen, and is in a nice walkable part of-"

"That's not the fucking-" Eddie let out a sigh, recentering himself, "-It's got you, dipshit. That's what I mean. You're there."

Richie grinned, "I mean... so is Bev-"

"You are such an asshole," Eddie huffed out, unsuccessfully hiding a laugh, "-didn't I tell you to shut up? I'm trying to fucking say something."

"Yes dear," Richie responded, flatly.

"Oh my god, Richie-"

"Okay, okay," he let out a laugh, putting his hands up in surrender (even though Eddie could not see him), "-I'm done, I'm done. Go ahead, Eds."

"I fucking hate you," Eddie retorted, with no bite.

"Agree to disagree," Richie remarked, before adding, "-Seriously, I'm done. Scout's honor."

"That means fuck all if you weren't an actual Scout, dickweed."

"How do you know I wasn't?" Richie proposed -curious.

"I just know," Eddie responded oddly. Like he was-

"Oh my god, Eds-" Richie almost jumped in fucking place, "-were you a fucking Boy Scout? With the cute little uniform and sash and hat-"

Eddie huffed out, "It's a really good program, asshole."

"-Please tell me you have pictures, Eds, you don't understand. I will print it out and frame it on my wall."

There was a pause.

"You have pictures?!"

"Well, fucking yeah," Eddie spit out, maybe a little embarrassed, "-obviously. And they're already fucking photos, they're in like a baby book-"

"Eddie baby," Richie cut off, "-please tell me you're packing that."

"Of course I am, asshole," Eddie retorted, "-It's all my fucking memories, why wouldn't I take it with me?"

"Thank god," Richie raised a hand, silently thanking somewhere in the sky.

"If you're gonna make fun of me-" Eddie started, prickly and defensive.

"Eds, no," Richie clarified, laughing (which was not helping his case), "-I would physically sacrifice myself to see your baby photos. You are so fucking cute now, I can't imagine you as a baby. Especially in a lil Boy Scout uniform-"

"Yeah, okay, well," Eddie blew out a breath, and Richie could tell he was flustered, "-I'm bringing it. So."

Richie processed that for a second (and maybe he did a physical fist pump, no one really knew) before his mind flickered elsewhere. And his mouth was off like a rocket, like it always was.

"How soon?" He spoke, palpably excited -grinning way too fucking bright, "-How soon do you want to come?"

"Maybe if you hadn't fucking distracted me," Eddie reasoned, "-you'd know that."

"Eddie baby," Richie spoke (yes, he was pulling that card), actually apologetic, "-I'm so sorry. When do you want to move in with me?"

There was a silence, and Richie could nearly hear his resolve weakening (bingo). He probably had his arms crossed and was rolling his eyes-

"It's like supposed to be two months, right?" Eddie asked.

Richie was totally not counting the days (nor had he bought a physical fucking calendar just to write Eds in a heart on the day he was supposed to get here), "Give or take."

"Well," he paused, mulling it over, "-I think at most a month. Maybe."

"At most?" Richie asked -blankly.

"It'll probably be as soon as I can sort out all my shit," Eddie stated -plainly, like he wasn't changing Richie's whole life, "-I have to pack, talk to my shitty landlord, and buy the plane tickets-"

"Aren't you afraid of flying?" Richie asked genuinely.

Eddie seemed to pause for a second, processing, "How did you-"

And then he stopped.

"-Forgot about your fucking Eddie files."

Richie snorted again.

"Yeah, I am," Eddie addressed, "-but the trip is like fucking 40 hours long-"

"43," Richie instinctively corrected. Shit.

"Have you-" Eddie seemed to process for a second, "-Have you searched that up?"

Richie gnawed on his lip for a second, trying to figure out how he wanted to go about this. Eddie already knew that he loved him, to be fair, so it probably explained any of his behavior enough for a pass.

"Well, you were talking about moving in, and-" Richie breathed out -hesitantly, "-you're afraid of flying, so I.. So I looked into it."

"What were you gonna do? Drive to me?" Eddie laughed a little.

Richie was definitely not laughing. Eddie's laughter cut short, and there was a second.

"Rich," Eddie echoed out, disbelieving,"-are you serious?"

"Well, I just," Richie pursed his lips, before relented, "-Yeah, okay, yeah. I was, Eds. But if you... If you just want to fly though-"

"No," Eddie interrupted, "-No, I'd rather drive."

"The whole 43 hours?" Richie asked, genuinely.

"Well, it's fucking different," Eddie offered, most definitely a little flustered.

"How exactly?" Richie laughed, "-The trip is the same amount of time, Eddie baby. Well, I guess I could shave off some time if I-"

"Shut the fuck up," he cut him off, directly, "-You're not doing shit."

"Sir yes sir!" he chimed -instinctively.

He could nearly hear Eddie roll his eyes, it made him grin.

"It's different because it's with you, dickweed," Eddie answered, "-I wanna do it with you. Obviously."

"Yeah, well," Richie was smiling, "-I did tell you I'd do anything you wanted, Eds."

"Well then, okay," Eddie paused, "-come and get me in a month."

"Just a vague month?"

"No, fucking of course not," he automatically responded, "-I'll give you a specific day, and time. And on that point, you better not be late."

"Ah," Richie sighed, "-there's my Eds that I know and love."

"Yeah," Eddie spoke softly, maybe in disbelief, "-you love me."

Richie smiled, eyes falling to his feet. This was something he never wanted to forget, even though he'd be here so soon. He didn't want to forget these calls, ever. He hoped he could recount them until he was old and gray.

"Fuck yeah, I do, Eds."

In retrospect, Richie didn't realize that Eddie hadn't said it back. But, he didn't really care. Eddie would say it whenever he wanted to. Frankly, as long as Eddie kept dating him, he didn't need it. Don't get him wrong, if Eddie said 'I love you', Richie could probably die happy. Or maybe never have another bad day in his life-

Today, Richie was streaming. It was a boring one, a Q&A but he was kinda tired so, it would work. His subs actually liked Q&As because Richie would wholeheartedly answer all kinds of things. It was limitless, the mods really only stepped in on super serious shit.

"Hey motherfuckers," he chimed, grinning brightly (his subs were used to his new smile by now), "-how are we today? Anyone have shit to share with the class?"

Richie skimmed through the chat.

"Pretty sure my Mom slept with my boyfriend," he read, raising his eyebrows, "-Shit, dude. What the fuck? I'm not even sure what to say to that. My condolences...? Is that like shitty of me to say-"

stan.the.man donated $1: no I think that's fair

"Stanthony, hey," he smiled, shooting finger guns at the camera, "-welcome to the stream. No good birds to watch?"

dizknees: a q & a in this economy ???

girlie-pops: hey trashmouth

elite._.gamer: started with the games ended with the streamer

too.tough.to.cry: how do we submit questions

trashy.tozier: @/dizknees I know I'm scared of what these questions are gonna be

stan.the.man: fuck you richie

trashmouth-for-me: @/too.tough.to.cry the link in the description

benny.boy: hey rich !!!

babey_boy: this is going to be so fucking cursed

"Hi Ben," Richie chimed again, "-I'll give it a few minutes for all your questions to come in-" his eyes darted to the submissions (it was growing exponentially), "-Actually, we're pretty fucking full as is."

Giving chat one last glance, Richie turned to the form, skimming through the submissions -this was going to be a total shitshow. But hey, that's what the trashies loved so... he was here to deliver.

"Who do you think tops, Luigi or Bowser?" He read out, pressing his lips together and furrowing his eyebrows, "-Are we talking about Mario? Like big turtle monster and Italian plumber?"

trashy.tozier: yeah it's from the movie

"Oh, the new movie?" Richie asked, which chat confirmed, "-Yeah, I won't watch it, fucking hate that Chris Pratt got it, honestly-"

trashmouth-for-me: say less king

ghostie_girl77: no bc exactly

cryingandscreaming: so reallll

bouncing-baby-boy: I liked it 🤷‍♂️

the.losers.are.better: I like him as star-lord and in parks and rec

girlie-pops: @/bouncing-baby-boy red flag

flying_froggerz900: I only watched it for jack black

toziers-trash: say that

your._.mom: period

gnarlybabes: peaches peaches peaches peaches

"I mean, it seems kind of obvious...?" Richie brought himself back to the question, thinking, "-Bowser is a fucking monster king, and Luigi is like a more... fragile character. Unless he has another side to him, but I don't get those vibes, and fucking trust me, I know them-"

Honk, honk!

reddy.bevvy donated $1: hi love you but shut up :)

"Bevvy! Love you too-" he grinned and blew a few kisses to the camera, before refocusing, "-I think Bowser is my final answer. Alright, next question-"

He clapped his hands once, peering over the list and reading, "What is the sexiest finger?"

"Oh, easy," Richie waved it off dismissively, "-middle."

dizknees: EXACTLYYYY

an_idiot_sandwich32: no bc there's literally no other answer what

hunterz-dream: if you disagree think again

babey_boy: obvi

trashy.tozier: anyone seen 🍝 ?

girlie-pops: the only other valid answer is maybe ring

elite._.gamer: this makes no sense but he is right

It went on like that for a while, with somehow both questions he'd expected and questions he most certainly did not (some about Minecraft, and also asking if he preferred Coraline's mom before or after spiderization, typical stream really). And then, he saw it.

"Do you have a boyfriend?" Richie read out, licking along his teeth -debating (they had talked about this, but he didn't want to cross any boundaries).

He mulled it over for a second, before deciding to answer, "Yeah, actually, I do."

trashy.tozier: WHATTTT

tell_me_a_lie: there goes our single rep

reddy.bevvy: 😉

dizknees: 🍝 ? 👀👀👀

babey_boy: we lost another one ✋️😔

too.tough.to.cry: wait fr

girlie-pops: let's go gays

trashmouth-for-me: @/dizknees reddie real ???

toziers-trash: real or imaginary

your._.mom: trashmouth lore drop

genuine._.disappointment: imma die alone

stan.the.man: @/toziers-trash tragically real

girls.girl: tell me more

Richie promptly didn't say anything else about it. Mostly so he could figure out specifics with Eddie later. He wanted to tell them, honestly, but he wasn't gonna do anything without talking to him. Richie's life was already public, Eddie deserved the choice -he stood by that solidly.

And so the stream moved on, well, until it didn't.

"I'm not really sure about the-"

Bzzt, bzzt.

Richie paused, cutting himself off. His eyes dashed to his phone, eyeing the screen. It was an actual phone call-

💞 Eds 💞

He furrowed his eyebrows, a little concerned, before turning to the camera.

"There's the man now, folks," he chimed, happily, and moved the screen over to the break one -promptly muting his mic, "-Gimme one second."

He spun in his chair, facing the wall, just in case, and answering.

"Eddie baby, what's up?" He asked, in a casual sort of concern.

Eddie immediately responded, bristly (maybe because of concern on his part too), "What's up? I've been trying to call you for fifteen fucking minutes-"

"Eds, relax," Richie laughed, "-I had my Instagram notifications off."

"What, why?" Eddie asked -innocently (it was really fucking cute).

"Well, Spaghetti," Richie added -carefully, "-I'm streaming right now."

"What?" Eddie asked again.

"Don't worry about it," Richie quickly amended, "-I'm muted and have my little break thing up."

"No that's not-" Eddie seemed to pause, voice more distant like he was looking on his phone (maybe had him on speaker), "-I didn't get a notification. Since when are you streaming today?"

"I told you this morning," Richie replied, laughing, "-It's just a Q&A. They actually... They actually asked me if I had a boyfriend."

"And...?" Eddie questioned, plainly. It made Richie want to squirm, because he couldn't tell what the right answer was.

"I told 'em yeah," he answered, slowly, "-but I didn't say it was you or anything so-"

"Why not?"

Richie paused, pressing his lips together, "You... You want me to?"

"Well, yeah," Eddie clarified, a little flustered, "-I already told you that."

"It was actually more kinda implied," Richie noted before pointing out, "-I didn't just wanna say shit without your fucking... approval, Eds."

"Well, I'm giving it," Eddie replied, sturdily.

"Okay, so-" Richie laughed a little, "-I'm just gonna tell chat that we're dating?"

"I don't fucking know, dipshit," Eddie bit back, "-it's your stream."

Richie gnawed at his lips, trying to think. Could he just work it into the conversation? Would that be forced and awkward? How the fuck did he want to do this?

He took a deep breath in, trying to think. He could hear Eddie shifting through the phone, and he thought his mic might actually pick it up if it was on-

Wait.

"Eds," Richie grinned, "-how do you feel about being on stream?"

"On stream?" Eddie questioned.

"Yeah, like your voice," Richie clarified, "-through the phone."

There was silence for a second.

"They already know I'm on the phone with my boyfriend," Richie explained, "-all I have to do is call you Spaghetti, and chat will connect the dots."

Eddie was slow to speak, but it came out a little frantic, "What the fuck am I supposed to say? I don't-"

"Just hi," Richie soothed, stopping the Kaspbrak spiral -effectively, "-Nothing else."

There was another pause.

"I'll be right fucking here, Eds," Richie said, gently, "-You know that."

Eddie let out a big breath, "Okay, yeah. Let's do it."

Richie gave him a little warning, before unmuting the mic and changing it back to the camera. He watched for a second as chat seemed to acknowledge him, and the grinned real big -putting the phone on speaker.

"Alright, everyone," he chimed, dramatically, "-say hi to Spaghetti."

"Hi," Eddie's voice echoed out, softer than usual (Richie thought it was both the cutest thing in the world and nothing compared to what he knew to be his actual voice). He actually seemed fucking nervous, which was new -Richie promptly added it to the Eddie files.

genuine._.disappointment: EDDIE ???

girls.girl: 👋👋👋

bubblingbabz: hi richie's bf

hog-inthebog: hiiiiiiii

younganddumb: reddie exists??? love wins

toziers-trash: no fucking way

powderpuffdonuts: 👋👋👋

stop.it.bruv56: 🍝🍝🍝

minecrafter.on.main: eddie stream when

dizknees: HOLY SHIT

babey_boy: 🍝 ???

trashmouth-for-me: I FUCKING KNEW IT

girlie-pops: no bc my gaydar was off the charts with those chats

trashy.tozier: @/trashmouth-for-me REDDIE CONFIRMED

tozier_babeyyyy: somebody clip that I gotta start a comp

elite._.gamer: 👋👋👋

harness-safety19: 🍝🍝🍝

only-here-for-trashmouth: @/tozier_babeyyyy 10 times trashmouth mentioned eddie and eddie told him to stfu

bevs.boa: hiiii spaghetti 🍝

trashy.tozier: @/tozier_babeyyyy @/only-here-for-trashmouth JSJKISNSJHSBSH

grumpy_frog: 👋👋👋

Richie smiled, eyeing the chat (Reddie, huh?), before pulling his phone back and turning off speaker phone. He was honestly giddy, of all things.

"Chats going fucking bonkers," Richie laughed into the phone, "-They really fucking love you, Eds."

"Yeah?" Eddie asked -maybe a little nervous.

"You should see it," he assured, "-They're all like saying Reddie confirmed. Apparently, they were clued in already, Eddie baby."

"Reddie?"

"Our ship name, Spaghetti," Richie chimed back, "-obviously."

"They do that for fucking real people?" Eddie remarked, and he could almost see the nose shrivel, "-Ew, what the fuck?"

"Oh, Eds, my sweet summer child," Richie hummed, "-I have a lot to teach you."

"Not that," Eddie emphasized, sharply, "-anything but that."

Richie promptly ignored him, teasing, "What if I got it tatted? Reddie forever, right above my heart-"

"You wouldn't fucking dare," Eddie chastised, "-I'd rather stay in New York than see that shit."

"Oh my, my, my-" Richie fanned himself like a damsel, "-Spaghetti is expecting to see me with my shirt off? How scandalous-"

"Shut the fuck up," Eddie replied, and Richie knew that he was getting flustered (God, he loved him), "-You're an idiot, and I can't stand you."

"Yeah, well," Richie hummed, "-I'm in fucking love with you, so looks like you're fucked, Eds."

Eddie laughed that time, and Richie felt it all the way down to his toes, "That makes it so hard to fucking argue with you, you know that?"

"What does?" Richie asked, almost forgetting he was on stream.

Eddie paused for a second, it came out in a huff of breath (flustered again), "You saying you love me."

Richie grinned, and wondered why he was so nervous about it in the first place. All of that seemed so stupid now.

"Well, Eddie baby," Richie breathed out, "-ya better get fucking used to it."