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moonspirit · 2 years ago

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Armin is basically your guide to leaving the forest. He is what Humanity needs to retain its Humanity.

Armin is hated on so much after S4 for being "useless" and "not living up to Erwin" but people forget, Erwin was so good because he had YEARS of experience. When Erwin died, he was what, 40-ish? At 15-19, Erwin was much the same as any ordinary cadet, you can see in the flashbacks in S3 Part2, a very young Erwin crying with a wounded/dead soldier and trying to fend off a Titan.

Armin is the embodiment of what the survey corps stands for - "Understanding". He is a pacifist and optimist but not naive, he knows that he has to kill when push comes to shove. He doesn't like violence but agrees that it is necessary sometimes. There is nothing wrong with that. He's a very relatable character. Don't forget that Erwin recognised his potential. He literally looked shocked when Armin theorised Reiner to be hiding inside the walls in RTS arc. Armin is the first character in the whole show to internalize his enemies thoughts and actions and try to understand it from their pov. He always tries to talk first and when that doesn't work, he pulls the trigger. You can tell me "his talking doesn't work!" but that doesn't mean you don't try. He's convinced and manipulated people plenty of times. If your only option is always to kill first before anything else, then you're not in your right mind.

A character is not weak simply for wanting peace. Armin doesn't run from his conflicts, he always faces them head on whether he likes it or not. His yearning to choose the method with the least bloodshed is actually admirable - it's easier to just pull the trigger in a world like SnK where people hate you, no? Why go through all the effort of trying to make people understand? He's a very strong character because he stands by his convictions.

It's unfair to burden him with Erwin's legacy at this age. He's also selfless to a fault. While Erwin did care for his soldiers, he never hesitated to use them as bait. Armin lacks that trait - being ruthless. Instead he has shown time and time again that he'd rather sacrifice himself so others can go unharmed. Despite the lack of experience, he still came up with some of the best plans, strategies and deductions in the show, some of them conjured up within seconds, and all that when he was even younger than he is now. Reiner was sweating and shitting his pants when Armin figured out the Female Titan's intentions in under 30 sec. At 15, Armin secured the collosal Titan for the scouts with just 1 casualty - himself. Just a few examples. He lacks Erwin's experience and deals with a severe lack of confidence, but for his age, possesses a lethal brain and outstanding intellect.

One of his most forgotten contributions is during the Scouts vs Kenny's squad. It was his analysis of the anti-personnel ODM gear, and following strategy, that allowed the scouts to exploit the weaknesses of their opponents' weapons. They wouldn't have won those fights with such success otherwise. He's extremely perceptive. Notice that when he fucked with Bert's mind back in S2, it was bec apart from Reiner (who knew from long ago), only he had noticed Bertie boi had a thing for Annie. He pays attention to his surroundings. He picks up on every little detail. He knows where to hit where it hurts. His 'Annie' strategy with Bert in S3P2 fails because he didn't realize Bert was a different person, someone who had stopped Annie from being his weakness. That was a crucial lesson Armin had to learn, but he learned it. He's very good with his words. People don't want him to open his mouth and change their minds (eg, Connie with Falco, Daz & Samuel). He's a genius strategist and war tactician in the making, give him a few years and see what he becomes.

One of my most favourite moments is during the table scene with Eren before getting beaten up, the only psychological attack Eren fired at Armin ("You're only visiting Annie cuz of Bert"), did not sting Armin at all, it only shocked him that Eren would try to bullshit him into that false logic when clearly Armin knew better. So Eren chose to beat him up, but Armin still had the final word. "You're the slave Eren" absolutely got under Eren's skin.

He isn't dumbed down post S4, it's just that the stakes are infinitely higher.

There's a lot of blame on him for "not doing anything in those 4 years despite having a genius brain" etc etc. Armin wasn't commander. They were dealing with a hostile world which they were desperately trying to understand for the first time in a 100-year history of being isolated inside the walls. It is one thing to understand people inside the walls and fuck them up (like Erwin did multiple times) but another entirely to deal with several countries in a world you discovered overnight. Politics and diplomacy is hard af. I doubt Armin would have been able come up with some 20/20 vision plan at that point to end the whole conflict anyway. Pixis didnt. Hange also didn't. Nobody did! The island had other intelligent people too!

Regarding Erwin, the whole point of his death was to show that he was put to rest from his suffering. It is the end of Erwin's story.

I dare say that if Armin had become Erwin 2.0, the haters would have said "Oh, he's just a copy of Erwin, he's not his own person!" So, conclusion: he's not supposed to be Erwin. He's his own person with his own methods and he's 19, leave him alone and please compare people with comparable experience.

Dude also went through a ton of issues as a young kid and has a severe inferiority complex, guilt at being revived instead of Erwin and the constant pressure of living in Erwin's shadow. Add to that his best friend of 19 years disappears, forces him to nuke a port and kill people against his desires, then pushes him away, doesn't explain shit, snaps and goes on a mass murder spree - you have a guy under extreme duress and he's still thinking of the big picture on Paradis, that genocide is wrong even though it's his best friend doing it. He has already subconsciously realised that they cannot stop Eren without joining hands with the same enemies they tried to kill a while ago. So despite having a mental breakdown, he still goes to get Falco back, because as a person, he values humanity and understanding above everything and can't watch another one of his comrades lose his shit and feed a lil kid to a Titan.

I also believe that Armin knew Falco was a decent kid, considering what he was taught in Marley, and choosing to save him was symbolic in that Armin wants to save the one kid who sees through the fucked up hate. In this moment he was the closest he'd ever been to Erwin (since Erwin's death) with that calculated risk, but also very true to being *himself* , very Armin, because he jumped to his death, aka, selfless. Rescuing Falco was a v good call, not only because the kid is a shifter and therefore necessary to form the alliance, but also cuz if you are a manga reader, well, you know why. He slapped sense into Connie, rescued Falco, showed a young Gabi what compassion meant and won her trust , and laid down the foundation for the Alliance before even knowing Hange and Levi were alive. He always sees the bigger picture.

And don't even start with the whole AruAni hate, they had a thing going on right from S1 during training years. If anything, Bert's memories of Marley only reinforced his already existing feelings for Annie and he "understood" her. He didn't forgive her. He "understood" her. See what I'm getting at? AruAni only further supports the fact that children of war are just children in the end, and love can permeate even that imaginary barrier of being on "opposite sides". It's a beautiful ship and I'm fucking glad it's canon. Something to smile about in this depressing show T_T

Kenny's ideology of "everyone being a slave to something" applies to nearly everyone on the show. But not Armin. From his birth, he has only been motivated by one thing - curiosity to see, curiosity to understand, curiosity to experience. There is nothing that ties him down so much that he can't die and give up. He is arguably the most "free" character in the whole of SnK.

Eren sets out to achieve freedom at the cost of freedom itself. But for Armin, freedom is simply the beauty of simple, little things. They are the two sides of the same coin.

I'm not being aggressive in any way, my comment is only to throw some light on Armin's character. I respect everybody's opinions at the end of the day and I'm not engaging in any wars.

#aruani #armin arlert #armin #attack on titan #shingeki no kyojin #aot #snk #armin character analysis

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chickensoup-4-mysoul · 2 months ago

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herculean (drrr x f!reader) - chapter 12

Chapter 12 - Temperature Rising

synopsis: you start the day with some self defense lessons with kadota and later, check on your arrangements with izaya

word count: 4,723

warnings: N/A

"but i need to know, i don't need to be shown i've gotta see it for myself, i've gotta learn it on my own i need to know if i am flesh & bone and am i still growing or full grown?,, flesh & bone - sammy rae & the friends

"Woah, Kyohei, you did all of this?"

Your voice echoes off of the walls of the oddly large bathroom. Trying to find Kyohei in this building was like navigating a labyrinth. The rest of the place was clearly unfinished, still covered in plastic tarps. You stared in wonder at the black and white checkered walls. Kyohei's perched high on some sort of ladder. He holds a black tile in his hand, coating the back of it with a gray paste before sticking it to the wall.

"Yeah, one sec. I'm almost done."

You're happy to watch as he fills in the remaining small spaces in the wall. He was clearly very skilled, making for a very satisfying spectacle. There was a certain art to it, you thought. After all, you could only imagine the thought and calculation that went into placing each and every tile. Though you had to admit, it was a pretty strange design for a bathroom. Kyohei jumps down from the latter, grunting as he stretches out his back. "Been at this for pretty long, huh?" you tease, removing your backpack and setting it down on the floor in front of you. You sit on the bottom step of the stairwell you had just descended from.

"Eh, nothing I'm not used to. What'd you bring?" He drags a small stool over with him and sits on it, right across from you. You eagerly open your backpack, rummaging through it before pulling out two plastic food containers. You hand one to him, eyes trained on his face as he opens it. Kyohei wasn't an emotionless or stoic guy, per se, but it was rare to see him express himself too openly. His posture was usually relaxed, mouth in a straight line, and eyes dulled by the shadow of his hat.

Not even the beanie could hide how his eyes widened. He was silent for a moment, staring at the contents of the container. You're holding your breath, wondering what he might say, or if he would say anything at all. One of his signature huff laughs has you internally sighing in relief. It doesn't stop there, unfolding into a chuckle, then a hearty laugh. You stop breathing again, but for a different reason. He had been happy before, sure, but like this, he looked outright joyful. You don't even care about whether or not he was laughing at you, this man was breathtaking.

You clear your throat and do your best to hide your burning face because woah you need to calm down.

"I'm sorry," he sighs, finally calming down. "I don't think I've had one of these since I was in school."

As a thank you for agreeing to aid you in your makeshift 'training', you wanted to do something special from the man. He mentioned getting something to eat after his shift. That's when you had the idea to make and bring something for him. It took some research and shopping the next day, but you managed to put together a couple of cute little bento boxes. You had even managed to find some boxes with little bear faces on them! Maybe it wasn't the most appropriate considering who you were preparing them for, but such a good find could not go to waste. Of course, Kyohei's wasn't quite as little. He was a grown man, after all, he needed his food!

You had gotten a little carried away with the tutorials, and it was only after you had cut a good five apples into bunny shapes before you realized that you were following instructions for a children's bento box. "Where did you even find this?" he asks, picking up one of said bunnies in his fingers and inspecting it.

"Actually, I made them..." you admit bashfully, escaping eye contact by staring at your own food. "I haven't prepared much of my own food since I got here, so I wanted give it a shot. Sorry if it's not exactly like what you used to have. I did my best with what I could learn on the internet." Your confidence depletes the more you talk and you find yourself wanting to explain yourself further. Cooking was definitely not your forte. What if you ended up giving him food poisoning and he never talks to you again?? Any internal goading you have going on is instantly dissipated when you see Kyohei's smile. He picks up a slice of the egg salad sandwich and takes a bite out of it.

"This is great! What, are you just going to sit there? You went to all that trouble to make it." Realizing how creepy you must have looked, you stuff an apple into your mouth in embarrassment. You both silently enjoyed your meals. Not to toot your own horn, you did pretty good. It was a bit of a cop-out to choose a sandwich, one of the most similar foods to what you ate back home--but hey, neither of you were complaining. You offer to let Kyohei keep the cute little box, but he respectfully declines--although you could see the consideration in his eyes.

"So, what's with this self-defense kick all of a sudden?" he asks, handing you the empty box so you can put it into your backpack. "No one's picking on you, are they?"

You hesitate to answer. He sounded so nonchalant, as if he wasn't at all expecting the truthful answer. "Not consistently, no..." He sees something obviously wrong with that answer, eyebrows knitting together in suspicion.

"But?" he presses. The sudden gravity in his voice is subtle, but you still pick up on it. You never pegged Kyohei as the type to do anything stupid or rash, but he was still the type of guy to be protective of his friends. You admired that about him.

"Well, you know about the whole Slasher thing...but recently I got into another little scuffle." It was not little. You still get tense wondering what it is that they were going to do to you. Obviously, Kyohei wasn't going to let you be vague here.

"A 'scuffle' with whom?" The hem of your shorts is really interesting to you at this moment. There was something about telling him the whole truth that was difficult to you. All you could think about were Kanra's messages from the other night. How would this affect the relationship between the Yellow Scarves and the Dollars? Regardless, you could tell that Kyohei wasn't going to let up until you gave him names.

"Just some punks from the Yellow Scarves. They thought that if they messed with me, they'd be able to get to Shizuo and the Dollars for some reason. I mean, that's crazy, right?" You force yourself to laugh.

He's silent for a moment. He reminds you of a dad in those TV shows where his kid comes home after curfew and he only says 'I'm not mad, just disappointed.' The sigh he lets out after a while really sells it. "Remember what I said a while back? About this stuff being dangerous and unfair?"

"Oh, don't 'I told you so' me!" you pout. "It's not like I didn't agree with you. Besides, I got out of there pretty much unscathed."

"How many of them were there?"

"Just three. One of them seemed to be a sort of ring leader. Some blonde dude. Flo-Rida?? Horila?? Something like that." You were being dodgy about the guy's name on purpose, but Kyohei didn't need to know that. Kyohei sighs what is probably his ten-billionth sigh ever. He stands, picking up his stool and moving it to another side of the room. "Alright, show me what you've learned."

With only a day and a quarter of practice, you were still pretty rusty, but Kyohei helped you through it. Once you had to get close to him, your brain, admittedly, started to short circuit. The two of you ended up watching a couple of the videos you had pulled up on your phone. You reenacted the different moves slowly, and Kyohei even gave you a few pointers of his own; whether or not the scenario was realistic, and if the method would actually work. You soaked up as much of the advice as you could, happy you had come to the right person.

Eventually, you stop to take a break. Kyohei's not out of shape by any means, but it's super muggy in this bathroom, and he is draped head to toe in clothes. "I don't get why you insist on wearing that suffocating clothing all the time. You're obviously burning up," you jest, watching as he wipes the sweat off of his brow. He grunts, sitting beside you on the floor.

"You do know it's October, right?"

"So what you're saying is, when it gets hot, you'll take that hat off?"

"Wha--and what if I don't?" Bewilderment is a cute look on him. You always wondered about his odd attachment to that beanie. It was fine, you guess, but after seeing him without it, you couldn't wrap your head around why he'd want to hide himself like that. Maybe even the 'bossman' himself had insecurities. You could help him with that if he'd let you.

"Hmmm, I don't know. I guess I'd just have to..." In a flash, you're standing over him. "Do it for you!" You snag the fabric of his hat between your fingers, removing it with a single tug. He's at a loss for words, staring at you with wide eyes (that you could see much better now). You cackle at the look of absolute astonishment on his face, making a move to scurry away. However, something catches between your feet, sending you toppling over.

"Hey, quit messin' around!" he grumbles, closing in on you in pursuit of his hat. With both of you on the ground, you both have to crawl around each other. It may be annoying for him but it's hilarious for you. You're so riddled with laughter that your movements are clumsy. At one point, he catches you by the leg, sending you to the ground again. You turn onto your back so you can see him better, only to find him leaning over you. He's reaching for the beanie, held in the hand you had above your head--not realizing the position he's put you both in.

It wasn't the first time the two of you had been in that position. In fact, you notice how similar it was to one of the scenarios you acted out. In a moment of opportunism, you lift your hips, effectively knocking him off of his balance. He's definitely stronger than you, but in this moment, he was vulnerable. You wrap your arms around his torso, clinging to him like a Koala, before quickly rolling over. It was honestly hit or miss whether it'd be enough to transfer both his and your weight, especially considering the fact that he wasn't playing along at this moment. To both his and your surprise, you're able to flip him onto his back with you now on top of him.

Now both of you are out of breath, halted in your positions as you tried to regain your cool. You can't help but start to laugh again, adrenaline sending you into a bit of a giddy fit. "Guess that technique does work after all, huh?" you say, looking down at him. However, at the sight of his face, you're struck speechless. You had seen a lot of new sides of Kyohei today; his laughter, his surprise, but this one was your favorite, you think. It was subtle among the tan of his skin, but from the close proximity, you could easily see the flush in his face. "Hey, are you okay?? You're not too hot, are you?" you asked. He doesn't answer, and in his silence, you finally hear the sound of approaching voices. Very familiar voices.

"Hey, Dotachin, you in here?"

"This place is like a maze, these directions you gave us don't make sense at--Woah!" You have no clue how Walker does that thing with his eyes. Your contemplation on the nature of his facial anatomy is interrupted by Kyohei, who sits up and gently pushes you off of him. "Hey guys! You all ready to head out?" You greet them as usual, smiling brightly at the sight of your good friends. Walker and Erika return the favor, but there is something off about them. Saburo won't even make eye contact with you. You turn to Kyohei in hopes of finding some sort of understanding, but he's no better than Saburo. Huh. How weird...

...

"I just never pictured Dotachin to be the catcher..." Erika seems to believe that by holding a hand over her mouth, she can keep everyone but Walker from hearing her, even if she continued to speak at full volume.

"Hey, wouldja shut up already??" Kyohei snaps at the two of them.

"I don't get it, is Kyohei into baseball, or...?" you mutter to Saburo, who only shakes his head. You notice a red flush on his face. "Just don't listen to anything those guys are saying. At all," he says back. You were all hanging out in the parking lot outside of the building. The odd atmosphere had dissipated, but Saburo and Kyohei were still a little standoffish, and Erika and Walker kept talking about things that you couldn't really understand (that last part was pretty normal, though). Regardless, you're just happy to be hanging out with your friends for a little longer. The smell of the oncoming storm in the air is soothing to you, so you lean against the side of the van, next to its open door. Erika sits with her legs dangling out the side, now discussing another manga with Walker, who stood in front of you both. You listen silently, trying your best to follow along with the confusing conversation.

"Listen, the moment the creators of the series confirm these crazy theories you have about their relationship, I will be the first to entertain the idea."

"But that ruins their entire chemistry, Yummach!! The whole appeal of their relationship is its ambiguity!!"

You feel your phone vibrate in your pocket and sneak a peek at it, assuming that your two friends would be too busy to mind.

UNKNOWN NUMBER It's been long enough since your last visit. If you can come today, I'd like to discuss your payment.

The next message is an address outside of Ikebukuro. As cryptic as it was, you had a pretty good idea as to who it could be. Making sure that Walker and Erika are still distracted, you sneakily send a message back.

ME I'll be there soon.

"Kyohei."

You're all taken off guard by the new voice, turning to see who it is. In front of Kyohei stood Masaomi. Just by looking at the boy, you could tell that something was off. The grave demeanor he had during your hangout at Russia's Sushi had only intensified. The gang had told you about their familiarity with the Raira Trio, and you all even crossed paths occasionally--but Masaomi had never intentionally sought them out, and certainly not by himself. Where were the others anyway?

"You came back," Kyohei says. Masaomi nods earnestly, obviously understanding the statement more than you did.

"I did. Let's talk somewhere private."

You are deeply confused and looking at everyone else, it seemed like you were the only one. Saburo, Erika, and Walker all eyed the boy, uncharacteristically dour. There was a situation that everyone here was aware of, except for you. You are reminded of your first escapade with the van gang at Russia's Sushi and how, at the mention of Masaomi's name, everyone had this same look on their faces. It didn't help how their gazes were not-so-subtly flickering in your direction. Masaomi's eyes meet yours, presumedly for the first time since he had shown up. It's like watching a lightbulb turn on, how instantly his face changes.

"Oh, hey there, (Y/N)! Didn't see you there. Thanks again for the sushi date, you sure know how to treat a fella!" His smile, the light in his eyes, it's all so obviously forced. You wonder what other times that smile was a facade--a facade that he had to put up around you. Ignoring the despair in your chest, you wave at the boy.

"Hey, Masaomi. Good to see you." You maneuver out of your place between Walker and Erika, approaching Masaomi and standing beside him. "I actually have to bail, now. I really lost track of time! It was fun hanging with you guys, as always."

"You sure you don't want us to drop you off? It's raining," Kyohei offers. His words are reinforced by the feeling of water sprinkling your face. It was a light drizzle now, but it was bound to get worse. As much as you'd like to avoid getting hypothermia, you didn't want to deter whatever serious conversation they were about to have. Not to mention, you were reluctant to reveal to them what you were really up to.

"Nah, I love the rain! See you guys later." You spare one last glance at Masaomi before you leave. The light had already disappeared. It was heartbreaking, seeing so much weight on a kid.

Whatever he was dealing with, maybe Kyohei and the others would be able to get him through it.

...

"Wow, you really meant soon, huh?" Izaya smirks at your drenched form. He sits in the same place you had left him, sipping on yet another mug. You're almost angry at how cozy he looks. Something fuzzy appears in your peripheral. It's Namie, holding out a towel. On the inside, you’re swooning. You gratefully accept it, thanking the woman. The fabric feels like heaven against your dripping face.

Once you're certain that you won't leave wet footprints all over the floor, you meet Izaya at the couch. Out of courtesy, you set the towel down before you sit. His eyes scan your form before he laughs. You wish that the man would at least try to hide his amusement at the sight of you. Your fingers anxiously scratch against the damp denim of your shorts. "So...how's it going?"

"Hm? Oh, I've been fine. I decided to stay in today after checking the forecast." You huff at his answer. This guy was one smug pain in the butt.

"N-no, I mean...Nice to hear you're having a good day, but...how is the job going?"

"I see." His jovial smile drops as he puts down the mug. The change in demeanor has you fidgeting terribly. You don't know which is worse, his smugness or his gravity. "I have to admit, it's a bit more difficult than I expected. I rarely extend my services to foreign affairs, so I'm still adjusting to the cultural barrier."

You don't want to admit how disappointed you are. Ever since you had made the request, you had really gotten your hopes up. You had spent the past year disregarding the past, choosing to simply look forward to all of the new memories you could make. However, now that you finally had an opportunity to learn more, you found yourself wondering just what kind of history you had. Just how large of a part of yourself had you lost?

"Aw, no need to look so sullen!" Guess your expressions were more revealing than you thought. "I'm certainly not giving up. It'll just take a little while longer. I understand that this must be important to you, so I'll provide a few forms of compensation for the wait." Your ears perk at the term 'compensation'.

"Compensation...?"

"Of course! I care about the satisfaction of my clients, after all." He leaves his chair and goes over to his desk. "First off, I'll be sure to cut you a good rate for your payment. I know my services can be a little pricy, and you are a young woman, so I don't mind making it a little easier." You're honestly a little offended. None of that really mattered, especially considering the fact that you could probably cover his normal price. However, you decide not to press, since it was basically your father's money that you were spending. As you decide this, you suddenly make eye contact with Namie, who seemed to be taking a break from cleaning. Her eyes were trained on you, narrowed and filling you with a feeling that you couldn't describe. Her gaze then moves to something behind you, most likely her boss. What was going on with her? Suddenly, she returns to her cleaning, just as Izaya returns from his place at the desk.

"I'd also like to offer you this," he says, setting something down in front of you. It was a manila folder, similar to the one he had been looking through during your first visit. Upon closer inspection, you realized that it was the folder that he had been looking through. You eye him cautiously, hesitating to even touch the folder. He doesn't seem offended, continuing to smile at you as he leans over your shoulder. The way he stays behind you has you skittish. "I noticed how interested you were in this case the last time that we talked. I've learned all that I needed from it, so I thought I'd lend it to you. There are some riveting aspects that I never told you about."

Of course he noticed that. He wasn't wrong, you had even found yourself wondering about it hours ago. You stare at the folder, wondering what it is about its contents that you'd find so interesting. After a moment, you finally pick it up, accepting his offer. He is visibly pleased by this. "Great! Well, that's all I had to discuss with you, so if you don't mind!" You're put off by such a blunt send-off, but you don't think so much into it. This meeting was just for business after all.

”I was in a car crash a year ago.” Your lips are moving faster than you can register. There’s a silence from the man behind you. Anxious from the lack of response, you look over your shoulder to catch a glimpse of him. He’s lips are pressed into a straight line—it’s such a short flash that you almost don’t notice it, but you swear that his mouth had been a smirk a mere second before.

“Is that so?” You don’t know what reaction you were expecting. Still, motivated by his engagement, you continue.

”I was in a car crash a year ago, and I lost my memory. All I know is that I’m (Y/N) Brigall, 19, adopted daughter of Dr. Neville Brigall. So please, understand what this means to me...I’m sure there are records somewhere, right? News articles, adoption papers, anything....” You’ve managed to choke yourself up. How embarrassing. Taking deep breaths through your nose, you rush to compose yourself. A thin, pale hand rests itself on your shoulder. Izaya smiles at you, and through your blurry vision, it almost looks genuine.

“I will find exactly what you’re looking for,” he promises. If you close your eyes and listen to just his voice, you could find all the sincerity that you need. You finally stand, grimacing at how your clothes were still damp.

As you make your way to the door, he calls out to you. Amongst the spacious room, his voice echoes off of the walls. "I just hope you don't lose sleep over this...perhaps you simply lived such a boring, ordinary life that there's not much to find!"

You don't what it is about his words that don't sit right with you, but you find yourself gaping in offence. You practically whirl around to face him, mouth fixed to say something, anything--you don't know what. However, your tongue stops as your eyes meet his. There it was, that smile--the smile that, on his own, could be perceived as courteous and welcoming. When paired with those narrowed, audacious eyes, however, it carried a whole different meaning that you didn't want to understand. Driven by the shudder traveling down your spine, you quickly exit, not bothering to say any goodbyes. You lean against the door, sighing in frustration. You had really gotten yourself into something messy, huh?

"(Y/N)?"

You gasp as you realize that someone is standing in front of you. As you travel down the mental list of people that you hope aren't looking at you right now, you realize that it's a very long list. Honestly, it's just a list of every person that you know. No matter what, when you open your eyes and look at this person, you were going to dread it. Despite this, you're still surprised at the sight of Masaomi, gaping at you. Staring into his wide eyes, you're at a loss for words. You don't know what you could possibly do to explain yourself. The way his fists are starting to clench certainly doesn't help.

You're internally berating yourself as you rush past him, never saying a word. What could you say?? You were caught messing with this man--this man who had probably done things to upset a lot of people. How could you possibly justify that? The further you get from him, the faster you move, eventually running until you've completely left the building. Why was he there? He was just with the others, wasn't he? Even under the cool rain, the burning in your face won't let up, persisting through your entire walk home.

You messed up.

...

Kanra: You guys hear? Kanra: The Dollars and Yellow Scarves went at it again! Taro Tanaka: Man, again? Setton: Scary... Sora: This is getting old! Taro Tanaka: Another scuffle, right? Kanra: Actually, this time, the Dollars hit the Yellow Scarves at their own HQ (°ロ°) ! Setton: A little bold of them, isn't it? Kanra: Yeah! Kanra: You know the Headless Rider? Kanra: Apparently, it teamed up with the Slasher--and together they attacked the Yellow Scarves at their secret hideout!

Out of every single thing you have heard Kanra say, you'd say that you'd believe about 15% of it. She always says such ridiculous things, you wonder if she'll ever quit. Why on Earth would Celty involve herself in all of this gang mess? Not to mention the fact that you watched her slam a Slasher in the face with the wheel of her motorcycle. There's no reason at all to team up with it.

Setton: Uh... Kanra: Something wrong, Setton? Taro Tanaka: That can't be true. Taro Tanaka: I can't believe that, even from you, Kanra. Taro Tanaka: That's way too absurd (´• ω •`)

Saika has joined the chat.

You, Taro, and Setton make a silent, mutual agreement not to share Kanra's antics with Saika, making up some imaginary special effects movie and raving about it. Kanra tries to deflect it, but you three win out due to strength in numbers. Saika seems to take the recommendation to heart, saying that she'll check it out. That lie is going to fall through very soon, but at least you managed to change the subject. At least, that's what you thought.

Kanra: By the way... Kanra: I heard this crazy rumor. Sora: What a surprise... Kanra: So mean!! 。゜゜(´Ｏ`) ゜゜。 Taro Tanaka: What was it? Kanra: They say that the leader of the Yellow Scarves wants to meet the leader of the Dollars and challenge him to some sort of showdown! Saika: Really??

The rest of the conversation continued as usual, with Kanra talking about all kinds of crazy stuff. Sometimes you wonder if she started this chat simply to spread her weird gossip. Where on earth did she get all of this information, anyway? It was always "I heard" and "they said". You wouldn't be surprised if it was all gossip she made up herself. You guess you should be more forgiving towards the girl. When she wasn't spreading rumors, she was honestly pretty funny. With the new addition of Saika, the chat's dynamic had only gotten more amusing. You often wonder if you all would ever meet in person. Honestly, since you were all in Ikebukuro, you wonder if you all had met already....

You laugh dismissively as the chat closes. No way!

#durarara x reader #durarara #drrr x reader #kadota kyohei #kyohei kadota x reader #izaya orihara x reader #izaya orihara

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sleepydross · 1 year ago

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Hey ho I wanna have a quick convo uh... *spins the wheel* queer eighteen to twenty-one year olds, sit down a sec, yeah? Let's talk.

Being in queer spaces, younger folk, new adults even, can find themselves thrust into positions of power - moderation, administration, etc. This post is for the folks in those positions and a quick lesson in 'You are not the arbiter of justice.'

You're a new adult. Perhaps you've lived a whole childhood, as most do, perhaps you've lived hard and rough, and damn near died, the way I did. It doesn't matter, because you're now in charge of a queer community, or you created one.

You do not know the moral arc of the universe. I didn't, when I was eighteen. I certainly didn't know or understand how tainted and 'liberal' my views were, rather than 'leftist.' For a number of years I even conflated leftism and liberalism out of ignorance.

But here's the rub - the places I wound up in power, I tried to keep my ideas out. I set rules, or had rules set, and enforced those rules, not the 'spirit' of them unless it was required, and I don't recall using my power as a mod to shut up someone I disagreed with unless they were... breaking rules, harassing others.

You don't ban people, or punish people, for not agreeing with you within the rules in place.

If you're the kind of eighteen to twenty-one year old queer moderator I'm talking to, I want you to process that last paragraph. It's about you, and you need to shut your fucking mouth a moment, and have some humility.

If you want to create real, lasting community, you need to be prepared to be *Wrong.* Being a moderator doesn't make you right, nor should you feel powerful, because moderation is SERVICE. You're there to enforce rules the larger community thinks are valid.

If you want to create a community that will fill up exclusively with people who agree with you on everything, my god, that will both collapse quickly and be the angstiest place on earth.

I'm not saying 'people you disagree with' here too loosely either. If you throw out nazis, that's not what I'm talking about. I am talking about other queer people who simply, to use a salient example, don't care that some rich people died in a shitty submarine.

You're young - and maybe you're privileged. Queer people can have privilege too, you know. But you need to understand that simping for the rich, and acting like a holier-than-thou ultra-pious person cause you got mad at another queer for going 'lol poorly made subs sink, richies knew that, served em right,' I need you to know that you're not.

You're just being a twat. You're not moral, or in some way good / better, because you made the super fun decision to *checks notes* uhhhhhhhhhhh get mad at other queer people and defend the rich and the cost, expense and danger of trying to save those rich people after they fucked up their stupid sub.

All of this is to say, eighteen to twenty-one year olds... please understand that the world isn't nice. Rich people aren't your friends. You're not doing something good by championing the humanity they don't have. You're just acting like a jackass, and making SURE your community will fail.

If that's how you wanna do, sucking boot and killing potential friendships so you can feel morally superior for loving rich people so much, hell, it's for the best youll never hold anything together.

But you could. You just gotta learn that being a mod, being an admin, doesn't make you RIGHT BY DEFAULT. Quit being arrogant cusses sometimes, it ain't a good look. Seek harmony, don't sow discord.

If you read all this, idk, I hope it made sense and got something across for you cause it's sure been something bothering me in multiple places for a while.

#trans #queer #discourse #discussion #how rules are enforced #fuck the rich #eat the rich #queer community #social #etc

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fatexbound · 1 year ago

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@epitomees said: It wasn't much, but then again it's probably best. Shinjiro never liked too much attention, not drawn to him or anything he did. Or his mere existence. Something small and simple was the best way to approach this. Thanks to Mitsuru-senpai's assistance, she learned about...a few things the older boy could appreciate. Not a lot, but Kotone worked with what she got. It started out when the two found themselves alone, out of sight and away from their dormmates. "...hey, mind if I can have your attention for a sec?" Though cautious, the red-head never tried suppressing her friendly demeanor towards the broody brunette. An eager smile, popped hip, and...a chocolate cupcake cradled in both hands; that's his first gift. "It's got chocolate chips in it too. And don't worry, this is nothing like Fuuka's previous cupcake attempts." Bless that girl's heart, she tried her damn best every time. Stoves and ovens never worked for her like computers and motherboards, though. The second gift appeared after Shinji took his baked treat in hand. It was wrapped safely in tissue paper, taped on top and on the bottom to preserve the precious contents hidden beneath it. "Soooo...you know that weird antique shop by the mall? Where the weird lady hangs around outside who owns the place?" No one could forget her. Once open, it revealed a small, ceramic statue of a dog sitting on a perch. "It's Hachiko! I think having the most loyal dog of Japan by your side would make for a great birthday gift~!"

Shinjiro's birthday | Accepting

It's a normal day. Nothing important should happen. Except that his plans of having some quiet time were interrupted by a certain redheaded leader after washing the dishes from tonight's dinner. He yelled at everyone beforehand for eating like animals, but... there's a certain nostalgia to it. He used to be the 'head chef' at the orphanage because he was the oldest and knew some things. Now that brought him back to reality with... a chocolate cupcake that landed in his hands.

"...You shouldn't have." Really, she shouldn't have. Why did she bother with someone like him? Nonetheless, it was better than whatever Yamagishi made in the kitchen. That girl was due for a lot of cooking lessons. Tempted by the fresh smell, he took a bite and was in heaven in minutes. This was delicious, but he'd never admit that out loud.

That was only one out of two gifts. Nodding subtly at her queries, he recalled seeing that woman once in a blue moon. She never left her shop. Shrugging, he put the cupcake down to open it up and what he saw shocked him to his core. Naturally, there wasn't a person in Japan who didn't know about the story of Hachiko, including him. It always made him tear up every time he watched it.

"That statue... it's nice. Almost too nice." It's probably because he took good care of Koromaru every day, and even cooked him meals. "...I guess I should thank you for all the trouble. You didn't have to that shit for me, though. It's no big deal."

#epitomees #Shinjiro answers;#Memento Mori | P3!Shinjiro #long post #Shinjiro's birthday 2023 #he loves them shhhh don't listen to him :3

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90363462 · 2 years ago

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Shutterstock

Is There Anything Wrong With Loving Sex But Hating Intimacy?

So, what if you like coitus but not cuddling?

Shellie R. Warren

Nov. 27, 2020 05:03PM EST

Based on my personal views on sex (that it shouldn't treated lightly or casually, and it's something that affects our mind, body and spirit—both the Bible and science will back that up; more on that in a sec), there used to be a time when I thought penning something like this would not be necessary. Yet, if you live long enough, life will teach you some things and expose you to a world of people who think totally different than you do. Between once working with a ministry that got people out of the sex industry and free from porn addiction, being a pregnant teen director for the local chapter of a national non-profit and then becoming a marriage life coach, I have met many (MANY) people who are kind, loving, generous—and also love the act of sex while pretty close to loathing the thought of engaging in physical intimacy.

For the record here, I'm not speaking of commitment-phobes. Those are a horse of a whole 'nother color, chile. No, I'm referring to those who are all about gettin' it in, as much as possible; however, when it comes to a ton of foreplay and definitely when it comes to any afterplay (or honestly, even when it comes to much physical intimacy in between romps), they are more than happy to take a pass. Oh, and before some of you roll your eyes and say to yourself, "Hmph. Sounds just like a dude", actually, who has shared this perspective with me the most have been women. So many, in fact, that I thought there had to be at least a handful of our readers who also can relate on some level.

So, let's do this. Let's dig into the polka dotted unicorns known as folks who love to have sex but can actually do without all of the physical intimacy stuff—whether in the bed or out. Is that problematic or not? Let's explore.

Is There Really Such a Thing as Sex Without ANY Kind of Intimacy?

As someone who grew up being taught that the Bible was to be the foundation for the choices I make, sex has always been seen as being pretty sacred to me. I'm pretty sure that anyone who is even remotely familiar with the Good Book knows that it says that sex is for married couples, period. Hmph. Come to think of it, I don't know of any holy books that say otherwise (definitely not the Qur'an or the Torah). And when it comes to Scripture, specifically, the verse that I've always adored is this:

Now here's the thing. As a woman who's never been married before (by choice, not by circumstance. I'm pretty sure many of you can say the same), you can read articles I've penned for the site like, "14 Lessons I've Learned From 14 Sex Partners" and "Why I Named The Children I Aborted" to know that I am certainly NOT the posterchild for abstinence (check out "I've Been Abstinent For 12 Years. Here's How."). I think that a part of it is because, although I do think that sex is absolutely best in a long-term relationship, the physical pleasure that comes from the act can make it REALLY HARD to turn it down, even if you're not "officially" with someone. That's why, I totally get it, when one of my married friends says to me, every time I hit another year of abstinence milestone, "It might be biblical, but it sure as hell ain't natural." Understood.

So why I am even approaching the topic of what sex is from this angle? Mostly it's because, when it comes to sex making two people one, whether you try and apply a holy book to your life or not, this is one area where religion and science are largely on the same page. Why do I say that? In walks, oxytocin.

Say that you don't subscribe to any particular faith or that you don't believe in God at all—science is still out here, making it abundantly clear, that there are hormones in your body that are designed to bond you to the person or people you have sex with.

That's why I've written articles on here like, "Don't Mistake A Great Sex Partner For A Great Life Partner" and "We Should Really Rethink The Term 'Casual Sex'"; while physical pleasure is certainly a benefit of sex, it's important that you don't overlook the fact that sex can mentally and emotionally bond you to someone too. Don't believe me? Think about the guys you've dated who you didn't have sex with vs. the ones you did. 9 times outta 10, who was harder to shake? Be honest…with yourself.

You can Google articles about who has better sex—married people or single people (it's married folks). You can poll your friends about when they thought sex was better—in a long-term commitment or not. At the end of the day, it's kind of hard to get around the fact that while the mechanics of sex can be enjoyable, whether you're with your sexual partner or not, when the emotional intimacy component is in place, it's simply bar none better. And here's the thing—to a certain extent, oxytocin is gonna make damn sure that some level of attachment is cultivated…whether we want it to happen or not.

That's why, it's my personal belief that people who say that they like sex but hate intimacy may be in a bit of denial about the intimacy that transpires during the act, regardless of what they think is happening (or not happening). Yet when it comes to things like kissing and cuddling and them being semi-disgusted, let's pull back the curtain on that psyche, just a little bit more.

So, About Hating Physical Acts of Intimacy. What’s Up with That?

Some of y'all might remember, a few months back, when I wrote, "Umm, What's Up With These People Who Hate Kissing?". It was pretty enlightening, even to me, and I've been writing about sex for a couple of decades at this point. One woman I interviewed for the article said that her husband's tongue always feels awkward. A guy said that mouths feel wet and weird to him. What I found to be fascinating is, the people I spoke with didn't give me the impression that they had issues with physical intimacy, in general, so much as the mechanics of kissing itself. Got it. But what about physical intimacy overall? I decided to ask Melissa and Eric from that same article for their hot takes on that.

Melissa. Married. 29. "Funny that you would ask me this because I'm weird when it comes to physical intimacy. While I do like to hug my husband and I enjoy being close to him while we're watching television or something, during sex, I'll pass. Like cuddling after intercourse? All I can think about is that wet spot and how I want to get out of it. I don't know.

"The sex is good but once it's over, I enjoy my personal space. I'm just now thinking that it might be because, once you've been that open with another person, you need to retreat to gain your bearings a bit. Does that make sense? I wouldn't say that I hate physical intimacy so much as, to me, it's just not all that necessary."

Eric. Single. 25. "I'm not even used to a woman separating sex and intimacy, so this question has caught me off-guard. Anyway, I like physical intimacy if it's with a woman I'm emotionally intimate with. Otherwise, physical intimacy before or after sex feels like we're trying to make the relationship something that it's not—or something that it's not yet. A lot of cuddling and stuff like that is way more sentimental to me than just intercourse, so if we're not together, I'm not the biggest fan."

Just to round this out a little bit, I decided to ask someone else I know who happens to love sex and loathe physical intimacy. Let's call her "Sheryl".

Sheryl. Married. 39. "I definitely have a higher sex drive than my husband and I absolutely am not a fan of physical intimacy. Meanwhile, he can't get enough of it. It just feels hot, awkward, and like you're invading my personal space. I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that I grew up in a home that was loving but definitely not big on the PDA. So, I got used to not needing a lot of physical touching. Plus, my husband is the exact opposite, which feels clingy and needy more than anything else. I don't think there's anything 'wrong' with me. I just think I process that a lot of touching comes with sex and outside of that, I'm cool. Who said that everyone needs to get kissed and cuddled all of the time, in order to feel loved, anyway?"

Sheryl has a point. Who did say that physical intimacy must come before and after sex is a cardinal rule? I will say that as someone who is a words-of-affirmation-and-physical-touch-love-languages kind of girl, I can't even imagine the two not going hand in hand, but after speaking with these individuals and also other clients, I get it. You can very much enjoy sex and not need all of the foreplay or afterplay that comes with it for so many people. It doesn't mean that anything is "wrong with you". It's just not your personal preference.

Still, how do you know when your preference might be linked to something deeper or if it has a great potential to become highly problematic in your relationship?

If your avoiding physical intimacy is costing you your relationship. Relationships are about compromise. And you know what? In many ways, so is sexual fulfillment. Even if physical intimacy is not really your thing if it is something that your partner needs or enjoys, find ways to meet him halfway. Again, as a physical touch person myself, to simply clam up after sex feels like rejection. If your partner feels the same way, that can start to build a wedge between the two of you, even if that's not anywhere close to being your intention. By the way, it's also a good idea to bring how you're feeling up to your partner. Even though it might seem a little odd to them, knowing where you're coming from can help him to be more patient as the two of you work to figure out what will work, well, for you both.

If compromising causes you to feel violated. There is a caveat to what I just said. If compromising in this realm makes you somehow feel physically or even emotionally violated, don't push past that. Instead, do some sex journaling or even consider seeing a reputable therapist, counselor, or life coach about what's going on. I know someone who used to hate kissing in the mouth. After seeing a therapist, come to find out, it was because she had been molested by a cousin who used to force their tongue in her mouth when she was little. While it can't be said enough that not preferring physical intimacy "just because" isn't a red flag, if you're someone who clams up or lashes out when someone attempts to be physically affectionate with you, that could be a sign that you're suppressing something. It can never hurt to work with a professional, just to see if that could possibly be the case.

If you "fear" physical intimacy. Not needing a hug vs. being terrified of one are two totally different things. If you fall into the latter category, it very well could be that you are dealing with some level of philophobia which is basically being afraid of emotionally attaching to another individual.

I know we covered a lot of ground here, but as I draw all of this to a close, let's get back to the title of the article. Is there anything wrong with loving sex and hating physical intimacy? In short, no. There's not. Just make sure that feeling this way isn't harming your relationship or that the "hate" isn't tied to something deeper. Other than that, feel OK with being this way. It takes all kinds to make the world go-'round and being different isn't automatically wrong. Enjoy your sex—and well, your dry spot too, sis. #wink

Are you a member of our insiders squad? Join us in the xoTribe Members Community today!

Featured image by Shutterstock

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akechigoroarchive398 · 11 months ago

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rank 3 - cafe

Akechi: Hey, Kurusu-kun. Good evening.

There's actually a prolific cafe over there.

I was hoping we could discuss things over some tea, but...

Unfortunately, my television appearance has earned me the attention of a rather extreme fanbase.

As far as they're concerned, anyone in my company must meet their standards of intelligence and attractiveness...

If not, well, they take it to social media, denouncing and harassing the people in question. I wouldn't wish that on you.

> (Akechi wants to have a discussion ata cafe nearby... With the Knowledge and Charm that I have, it shouldn't be a problem...!)

Akechi: But you? I expect you'll pass muster easily. > Hang out with him

Akechi: Thanks. The place is really quite popular.

It should be open right now... Let's get going.

Morgana: I'm gonna walk around. Let me know when you're ready to leave.

---

Akechi: The cake here's fairly popular. I've been wanting to try it myself.

> Got a sweet tooth, huh?

Akechi: Well, I don't hate sweets, but I'm not exactly partial to them...

Fads tend to be fairly similar, so I'm more curious about its popularity than its taste.

Well, why don't we give it a try?

Akechi: Mm, it was delicious after all...

I actually enjoyed that more than I thought I would.

Fad-Following Woman: Hey, look! Isn't that him?

Forgetful Woman: Ohh, you mean the guy who's on TV these days... Who was he again?

Fad-Following Woman: Wasn't his name Akechi-kun? You know, the next-generation Detective Prince...?

Should we ask him for an autograph? Might be something worth bragging about...

Akechi: Uh-oh, looks like I've been spotted. >Your life must be so hard. Akechi: Oh, I'm used to it, but I don't want to cause trouble for the store.

Male Passerby: Huh? Is someone important here?

Gossipy Woman: Who is it? *gasp* Is it a celebrity!?

Akechi: Looks like I'm out of time. I wish I could've relaxed a little longer, though.

We should go.

>You've done nothing wrong.

Akechi: Sorry, but I think it'd be best to leave. I'm only going to cause problems if I stay.

A shame I don't have glasses like you. Maybe I would have been able to get out of the situation.

>Come here a sec.

Akechi: Huh? Hey, what are you-!? ---

Akechi: ......

Fad-Following Woman: Oh, he's back. This time, I'll get his autograph for...

Forgetful Woman: Hey, is that boy really Akechi-kun?

Fad-Following Woman: You know... Now that I see him up close, I'm not sure...

Forgetful Woman: Maybe you were seeing things?

I don't remember the show too well, but I'm pretty sure he didn't look like that.

Fad-Following Woman: Aww! If he was the real thing, I could've bragged about meeting him.

Akechi: ......

---

Akechi: ...I can't believe you actually did that.

I suppose I'd better learn to watch what I say around you.

>You looked great.

Akechi: Is that so? Well, who else could make a peasant of the Detective Prince?

Still... there's no knowing how things may go unless you give it a try, hm?

I think I've learnt a valuable lesson. Thank you.

>Rank up

Akechi: Looks like our coffee's gone cold. How about we order new ones?

Akechi: Well, see you next time.

Akechi: Hello. It's a shame our discussion was interrupted today—I was rather enjoying having a breather with you.

But you certainly surprised me today. I can't believe we got out of that with such a basic trick.

It was an interesting experience, but... I definitely don't want to go through that ordeal ever again.

I saw firsthand what happens when I'm too careless with my words around you.

>Wasn't it fun?

Akechi: ...You have a twisted concept of 'fun'.

Though if you dressed as me next time, I think I might agree. I could use a stunt double.

You and I aren't terribly different in height. I'm sure my clothes would fit you.

If we do this, it'll have to be carefully planned, of course. I'll be dictating everything, from hair to accessories.

Nobody would notice the switch, I'm sure. We proved it today—most people can't see beyond the superficial.

Whoops... I've an early start tomorrow, so I'll have to excuse myself. See you soon.

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starsuh · 4 years ago

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do re mi | myg

featuring. min yoongi x reader | 3.2k

summary. while teaching you how to play piano, min yoongi realizes that his dumbass might have feelings for you after all.

genre. fluff | f2l | roommate!au | mutual pining

warnings. a quarter-life crisis and a soft make-out scene at the end

Amongst Min Yoongi's many talents, his sixth sense of knowing when something was bothering you was the one that most oft caught you off guard. Whether it was the intensity in which you slammed a door shut, or the way in which you didn't choose to annoy the fuck out him like you did every other day of the week; he would notice each time. It was only clockwork that he tentatively wrapped his arm around your shoulders when you had collapsed against the couch with perceptible chagrin.

"What's up?" he asked, a simple question that often entailed a more than complicated answer. Peering down at your tightened features, he awkwardly patted your shoulder as if to make known that silence would be just as valid of a reply.

You ran your hands through your face. "I don't know,” you said. If you did, you would've told him, just as you told him everything. Though the pair of you had began as merely two people who happened to be roommates because there were no other affordable options, spending months watching Netflix with another person tends to lead to friendship — even best-friendship, though neither of you had established such a title. It was the kind of friendship that needn't clarification, rather it was just another unequivocal fact amongst many.

After kicking off your shoes (Yoongi would scold you for that in a less emotionally-turbulent time), you pulled your knees up to your chest and wrapped your arms around them in a ball-like manner. "It's really fucking lame but I’m just realizing some things,” he nodded, prompting you to continue. "I'm scared of the future, I think. I mean, everyone is, but when our prof was talking about internships and shit earlier I kind of freaked out then decided that hiding in the bathroom was the best option.”

In his gaze was a reassurance so intent that you had to look away lest you become ensnared in it. He oft had that effect, increasingly so throughout the past few weeks. "What about it?"

Your eyes fluttered closed as you took a deep breath. “I think I know what I want to do, but then I see other people, people like you, who are so passionate about their place on Earth that to not do that thing would be a fate worse than death. Like, I love the path that I’m on but there’s always a voice that’s telling me I’m gonna fuck something up and regret everything.” You played with the loose threads of your top, pulling at the offending stitching. You laughed. “This is so stupid. I guess I’m just realizing that I might not be cut out for it.”

His sudden silence filled the room so heavily that you began to wonder if you shouldn’t have said anything at all. Gears turned behind the messy black mop atop his head that hung over his eyes; a face similar to the one he makes when contemplating a new track he had produced, seeking for each of its flaws and corresponding solutions.

It was so sudden when he reached down to grab your hand that you almost jumped. An inch away from falling onto his chest with the sudden upwards tug, you steeled yourself. "I'll show you something," he said to which you replied with a questioning stare. "It'll just be a sec, c'mon."

You allowed him to drag you to his bedroom, though not without glaring at the back of his head and whining. "Your room smells like Cheetos and day-old boxers."

He rolled his eyes. "I cleaned it this morning, so shut up."

He pushed the door closed with his hip, never once letting go of your hand until he unceremoniously shoved you towards the left end of the keyboard bench. You wiped the accumulated hand sweat against the rough fabric of your jeans, both thankful yet forlorn that he had let go. His was a comfort rarely given and you craved his affection the way one did with a cat that ignored those around it.

He reached down to plug the extension into the socket. "Can I play you something?"

You blinked, unsure if the nervous tone laced in the question was figment or reality. “What?”

He gave you a blank stare though it didn’t distract you from the way his hands fidgeted in his lap. “I said, can I play you something? Something I wrote?”

Impatient, he didn’t give you a second glance or a moment to reply before his hands flew across the board, pulling melodies out of the nooks and crannies of its black and white keys. Through every note, he told you of emotion, of love, of heartbreak and melancholy. You don't think you had ever understood what music was until then. It was more than his expertise, though he was quite the expert; it was the way his eyes closed at certain shrills and the way his shoulders hunched at others, the way he slammed harder into the keys and at other parts softer. He played like a poet. A writer. And you refused to be someone who didn't appreciate it for what it was: a story told to you.

The slight smirk gracing his soft features told you that he found amusing the way your mouth gaped open in shock. You’d only ever heard the distant echoes of his sound from behind closed doors as you walked past.

Yoongi had never played for you before, was even shocked that he was able to now, knowing that your mere presence in close proximity provided quite the distraction.

When he stopped, the air almost rang in its silence, as if you had forgotten what the world sounded like without his music in it. The hush blanket laid across the room felt bare and vulnerable. You understood now more than ever why he locked himself within the confines of his space in all hours of the day. If you could live in his symphonies, you would.

"Wow.” Because what else could be said? "That was... Yoongi, you're amazing."

His smirk remained, though as more of a mask to hide softer feelings behind. "Must've been if you're complimenting me for once.”

"Because you already have a ginormous ego."

He began playing once more. This time, a slow and deceptively simple melody. The chords were arrows tightly strung that flew through the air in wisps of smoke. To you, its warmth was paralleled to the feeling of his own beside you, his arm occasionally brushing yours as he reached to play a few lower keys.

"I think you're taking it too seriously," he said. "The future, I mean."

Your brows furrowed. "I kind of have to, dude."

He rolled his eyes but kept playing, occasionally glancing at you as he did so. "What I mean is," he pressed softly against the keys in the left end of the piano, their tenor notes filling your ears. "You need to calm down. Like this," the already soft melody slowed. "You know what you want, don't you? Why are you hesitating?"

You stilled, the feeling of being both caught and scolded grounding you in time. Your eyes focused on his hands to avoid the feeling of his analyzing gaze on the side of your face. “There are things I want to accomplish but there’s also things I want to have,” you groaned in exasperation. “I don’t know if I should choose the former or the latter but they’re so entangled that I can’t even tell which is which anymore.”

"Some things are only difficult if you think they're difficult." He looked down at the keys. "Like playing the piano, everyone knows that learning it is hard but something like this-" he played three chords in succession. "-sounds simple, right?" He continued to play those same chords until they blended together in a single melodious breeze. "But when I was a kid, learning piano was the bane of my twelve year old existence. I hated it so much because my impatient ass wanted to be good without trying. So, in true dumbass fashion, I quit taking lessons after two weeks."

You tilted your head towards him. “How did you learn then?"

“Well, I realized I was being a huge pussy and went back." Shaking his head before the glaze of the memory could wash over, he nodded towards you. Grabbing your hand, he placed them over the keys. “Can I teach you a chord?”

Your heart spiked in one fell swoop. “What? And embarrass myself in front of the music god himself?"

He laughed and it lit up his eyes brighter than the screen of his laptop that he had forgotten to shut off, still on the League of Legends home screen. “I told you, it's only hard if you think it is."

Too flustered to argue, you could only watch as he directed your fingers towards the correct keys until three were stretched towards their respective positions. C Major. You wondered if he could hear the rapid pace of your heart through the vibrations on your skin from where his larger hand rested atop your own. You could only pray to any god who would listen that he didn’t.

Among the numerous feelings that bubbled beneath your chest, the sudden pinch of ice that struck your nerves as he lifted his palm away from yours was one that you were the most unsure of. Filing that thought away for later, you focused on the most important task at hand: avoiding looking like an idiot in front of Min Yoongi.

Before you could retreat, your hands pressed down.

A sudden burst of sound filled the silence that you hadn't realized had grown so deafening. Your eyes widened as if you hadn't expected the chord to occur despite Yoongi's administrations, like trying to guess a passcode and getting it correct in a miraculous feat of luck. The now fading sound was not like anything you were expecting, though you knew even monkeys could do what you had just done. It was an actual piece of the puzzle that was music rather than the CD case or paper bag that had come with it.

Likened to an excited pup, you looked towards him for praise or assurance that you had done it right only to catch his already grinning countenance at your widened eyes.

For the next half hour he taught you two other basic chords, never failing to correct you in such a patient manner that your heart rose and fell with each glance and soft appraisal.

"But sometimes," he grinned. "Sometimes you need to stop thinking."

Your brows furrowed, though you didn’t need more than a few seconds to understand his cryptic wording before you yelped, almost flying off your seat at the abrupt disruption of the peace.

He began smashing his hands against the piano, creating the worst orchestra your ears had ever had the pleasure to hear. Overcoming the shock, both of yours laughs bubbled out, drowned by the keyboard speakers. Without a second thought, you joined, key smashing against the lower end. Together, you created an ear-grating masterpiece of cacophonous noise and piercing melody, yet it was still one of the most beautiful things you’d ever heard.

Yoongi began cheering your name like the greatest hypeman in existence as you gave the most effortful performance of your life, hands pressing against the first keys you saw to the last. You didn't know what you were doing but it didn't matter, not when he was smiling with his gums on full display as you went with your gut for the first time in years. Yoongi, the boy whose hands crafted magic, whose words changed you, whose music moved you. Yoongi, who looked at you and saw past your forced pretensions and society-enforced perceptions.

You laughed until your lungs ached for air, having not even realized that your whole body leant against his as you tried to catch your breath.

"Oh my god, I think my ears are broken," you covered them, finally dragging your hands away from the keys.

His grin widened. “You're a quick learner."

“Is this the part where I say that it's because you're a good teacher?"

“Only if you're polite, which we know you aren't." He hadn't stopped smiling and you had never felt prouder of any accomplishment in your entire life. “Was I able to distract you?"

You laughed, bringing your hands back to your lap to fiddle with them. He's seen you wear the same ramen-stained hoodie three days in a row with hair just as ratty yet you had never more felt exposed. “I’d say yes but I think I’ve exceeded my Yoongi compliment limit for the day."

"And here I was thinking that that compliment limit was zero."

"Hey," you playfully knocked against his shoulder. "I always say your breakfast is good."

He knocked against you back, his eyes turnt to half-moons. "That's because you want to brainwash me into cooking for you everyday with half-assed compliments."

"Or maybe," you lightly leaned against his hoodie-covered shoulder. "It's because I like eating breakfast with you."

He paused, and a grin that could only be described as shy graced his features. He tapped against the keyboard but didn't press hard enough to allow a sound to be let out.

"I trust you," he said in the silence. "That you can follow your heart. Even if that sounds corny as fuck, I really believe it."

You smiled, something you've been doing more and more often with him around. "I'll try," you said, watching as he contemplated his next words with a bite of his bottom lip. Giving him time, you glanced back at the piano. "Is it really that simple?" You pressed on a key.

He finally looked up. "I think so," he played the key beside the one you had just pressed, the side of it touching yours. "Even if it doesn't sound right to other people, who's to say that random key smashing isn't music? When you think you're supposed to play a certain way, that's when you hesitate. Even when you fuck up a piece," he pressed another key. "Regretting it doesn't stop the echo."

He began to play another soft melody, leaving you just as entranced as you were the first time he did.

“I’m a hypocrite, though,” he closed his eyes, lightly scoffing. “Giving you advice that I can’t even take.”

Your voice came out in a whisper. “Why?”

“Because...” He took a deep breath, hands leaving the keyboard as he fully turned to you. “I like you," he said it like it were a fact you should've already known. “I... I like you. A lot. I can't remember when you stopped being my annoying roommate who'd hog the fridge space and became the annoying roommate who I couldn't stop writing songs about. Before I could even realize and stop myself, today’s me kept looking forward to tomorrow’s you. I’d be a hypocrite to tell you to stop hesitating about the things in your life while I spent every second of every day wondering whether I should tell you my feelings and ruin our friendship.”

For if there was anything Yoongi knew more than most was that love was fucking stupid. It caused people to be irrational, selfless, and weak-hearted, yet why did he want to forget the stupidity that came with it whenever you walked into the kitchen for breakfast, hair messy and shirt tousled?

Love was fucking stupid. But maybe he could be an idiot if it meant that you'd be stupid for him too.

“I know you don't feel the same way but I just needed to tell-" you kissed him before he could finish what was sure to be a sentence so ridiculous that even the most astute of linguists would be left baffled. He was Min Yoongi. The boy who spent all day locked in his room making music and playing games with his friends. The roommate who'd wake up early just to cook you breakfast. The friend who knew you better than you knew yourself. The man who you'd found yourself falling for with every gummy smile. Yoongi. It had always been Yoongi.

And he was kissing you back.

His lips were as warm as the hands that carefully wrapped around your hips, gently pulling you closer to him. He kissed the way he played, soft and thoughtful.

Pulling away, he whispered your name slowly, prolonging each letter as if to savor them. Never before had your name ever felt so wonderful a one. His forehead pressed against yours, eyes flickering between yours in disbelief. The hand around your waist tightened as if in fear that at any moment you might say that you hadn't meant to give him what had to be the best moment of his life -- that you had actually accidentally fallen on him and he had simply been mistaken.

"You're an idiot," you laughed. "I've liked you since the first time you've cooked me breakfast if the heart eyes I gave you each time weren't already a dead giveaway."

He shuffled in his seat. "You have low standards then," he said. "Or are in desperate search for a house-husband."

You smiled, your nose brushing against his. "Maybe, a bit of both."

He leaned away from you, eyes lit up in a euphoria that didn't hinder from his nervous cadence. "Actually, that song I played for you? Earlier?” You’d never seen him blush before. “I, maybe, composed it thinking of you.”

"A personal chef, jester, and composer? I think I'm winning."

His nose crinkled. "You know you can still back out, right?"

"You're acting as if I'd even want to."

"Stupid songs like that... I suck at love yet I still want to give you everything," he whispered, voice hoarse. "But my everything will still only amount to that."

"If that's your everything,” your hands interlocked with his. “Then your everything is more than enough."

"I like you," he murmured the confession between your lips as if it were clandestine, the urge to say it a million times more bubbling up from his chest. Though stronger than his urge to say it was his urge to hear you say it back.

Your lips met his completely. Perfectly. "I like you, too."

Pulling away once more you couldn't help but laugh at the reddened color of his cheeks and ears. Cutting away at the awkward and still unsure tension, he inched backwards with a startlingly loud clap of his hands. "Now that that's settled, can we go back to making out? This corny shit is so awkward."

"I can't believe I like you," you groaned but kissed him back anyway.

While there was nothing in your life that you could be sure of, you knew that the man whose smile could light up the entire city of Seoul would be there for you for every step, and you wouldn’t have had it any other way.

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hawksugarbaby · 4 years ago

Text

Deku x reader- Minecraft millionaire

Fluff

A/N: I use Xbox so these are Xbox controlls but feel free to change them as you see fit

Izuku sat on his bed flicking his eye's from the facetime with you to the screen in front of him continuously holding the right trigger on his controller and chewing his lip. "Wait what level do you find diamonds?" he asked glancing at his coordinates in the corner and you jumped around the world trying to escape a creeper "Fuck i'm gonna die! i'm gonna die! please NO!" you yelped and decided it was time to dig a hole in the ground and block it off. "Sorry, what did you ask?" you look at the phone propped up against your laptop and chuckle at Izuku's face scrunched up in concentration "uh, what level do you find diamonds" he repeated not taking his eye off the screen filled with grey stone blocks and dot's of black for coal. "12 to 14, usually 13 is like the best place"

You answered uncovering the hole you had dug in just as a creeper passed over you and fell into your 3 by 1 grave. "NOOO!" you screeched as the green mob flashed white and you tried to jump out of the inescapable hole for a final moments peace but to no avail. The unmistakable sound of a muffled explosion and the respawn screen, lighting your face up red and you let out a fake cry. "Did you die?" he asked despite the obvious answer. "Yeahh" you answered with a heavy sigh and respawned at home, grabbing a spare wooden sword and jumping over to the spot of your death. If nothing else you'd get a lot of dirt?

Izuku muttered about hitting his head off every block and you snickered "I mean at least you learned your lesson about digging straight down" he huffed and flailed his arms creating a cold air around him "it wasn't my fault no one told me I shouldn't dig straight down!" he had a point, yes, but still you had presumed that even he would know such a basic rule "I know, I know" you say nearing the site of the explosion and start sprinting ignoring the band of mobs chasing you.

"HOW IS MY STUFF STILL HERE. IT WAS LITERALLY NEXT TO ME?!" you yelped in surprise but ran around the area gathering your stuff and spammed the Y button, automatically gearing up and switched your sword to your hotbar along with your enchanted pickaxe and cooked chicken.

"Maybe the minecraft gods granted you... something?" Izuku laughed and popped out of his mine running to his furnace and dropping in a stack of Iron. "(y/n) I hear you need some cobblestone" Izuku said running to your house across from his and down the basement to your storage area. You groaned begrudgingly trying to fend off an army of spiders who had made it a personal goal of theirs to off you. "Izuku please don't contribute to the cobble chest. I'm begging you. I don't need more cobble" you whined sprinting away with 5x more Xp than you originally had. "Do you have lapiz?" you asked raking through his chests to find the blue material.

Izuku opened the chest almost full with cobble and finished it off with 12 more stacks, leaving one or himself. The green achievement bar popped up at the bottom of the screen "Chestful of cobblestone" and you clicked your tongue pushing your hands together like a prayer in front of your mouth "IZUKU. I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD I'M GOING TO BURN YOUR COBBLE. STOP GIVING ME COBBLE, THAT GOES FOR ALL THE REST OF THE BOYS TOO!" your shouting could be heard throughout the dorm and some of the other minecraft players snickered to themselves.

Anytime, they had a stack or so of cobble, they would put it in one of your chests and it became a running joke for them to go "Hey (y/n) I heard you needed more cobble" and shove it in the chest despite your begging them not to. You had 3 chests of cobble but never got the achievement because you had burned the first 2 chestfulls before they could finish it off.

"Yes I have lapiz just give me a sec" he answered after your threat and jumped over to you. Meeting in front of your pumpkin farm you were jumping on. "If you fall you're gonna trample your crops" he said and you shrugged "that's what I have a diamond hoe for duh" you say in a bragging way as if having a diamond hoe of all things really just showed your wealth. You jumped off the pumpkin successfully not landing on your crops and spun around in front of Izuku as he threw lapiz at you "Is this what it's like to be a stripper" you chuckled and Izuku snorted at your joke. "Okay that's enough" you say, stopping him from throwing anymore and bouncing off to your enchantment table.

"I can't believe you had 4 extra diamonds and you made an enchantment table and a hoe" he sighed grabbing all the iron from his furnace and spinning to the crafting table to make a new pickaxe and a bucket for milk. He was determined to make a cake just as much as getting diamonds but there was a lack of cows due to bakugo's anger issues when he was in the server. "What would you even have done with them!?" "I COULD HAVE BOOTS (y/n)!" he shouted back and you purse your lips. He could have had boots...

"Okay well I'm sorry I'm rich and have full diamonds" you shrug and he looked up from his controller looking straight forward pinching the bridge of his nose "your a bitch" he laughed and started back down his mineshaft complaining about the steps hitting his head again. "You love me really" you chuckle and he rolls his eyes with a smile "yeah I know" you glance at the facetime and smile, 8 hours, 29 minutes 43 seconds you'd been on a call just playing minecraft in the server you ran for "the lads" as it had been dubbed.

"OOH IZUKU I JUST GOT FORTUNE 3 ON MY DIAMOND PICKAXE!" you exclaim, celebrating by jumping up and down. "Sweet! You're gonna have endless coal!" he laughed and you punched the air excitedly "so much Xp!" "we have an Xp farm" he retaliated and you pouted "Let me be exited" you whined and he awed "sorryyy" he said dragging it out for effect and you huffed "better be."

Izuku's inventory quickly filled with cobble, coal, and iron again, the occasional redstone for Xp and fuck gold, gold sucks. He stumbled into a cave, a platform of stone and on each side was a pool of lava. But Izuku's eyes lit up and he gasped "OH MY GOD!" he shouted digging through the wall to get to the prize. "WHAT!" you shouted back, busy breeding the chickens and throwing eggs in the overcrowded pen. "Sorry but some of you guys have gotta go" you muttered brandishing your iron sword, specifically named "the chicken killer" since you didn't want to waste your diamond sword on chickens. "DIAMONDS!" he shouted back building a platform around the edge of the lave he could walk on and building under the diamonds for safety.

"OH OH MY GOD WAIT THERE AND I'LL MINE THEM FOR YOU!" you say abandoning the chickens and jumping over to his house again. "wait why. This is my moment I've literally never found diamonds and you're gonna take them from me" he asked looking at the phone, your face twisted with concentration. "Because I have fortune 3 and I can make 8 diamonds like 24" you said. "can I mine these ones and tell you when I find more instead I want to mine my own first diamonds." you stopped at the entrance jumping up and down in frustration "okay fine"

As Izuku ventured further into the cave earning probably half a new chest worth of cobble he shouted for you. "I found more diamonds." you immediately sprang into life holding the left stick to go down quicker. "Okay yeah this is really inconvenient" you agreed about bumping your head on the way down and landed at his shaft. "Uhh which way am I going" you asked. "Left" he said. You followed the trail of torches and Izuku's name tag that got bigger the closer you were eventually running into the same square as him. "Move back I can't see" you instructed and he scooted backwards.

You swung the enchanted pickaxe collecting the aqua gems and throwing them at izuku. "That's like 20 something," you said, shrugging at the phone and running off back home. "That was 28" he said running after you to finally make his full iron armor and tools "I have 33 in total" he grabbed sticks from his unorganised chests that you despised and for the first time, made diamond armor in minecraft.

"Oh my god he's wearing BLUE! It doesn't match your colour scheme" you cried shielding your eyes and looking away. "Sorry (y/n) let me just dye my diamonds green real quick" he said, throwing an emerald at you and you feigned shock. "A MIRACLE. TRULY"

"Okay I wanna enchant it" he said following you to the enchantment table. "We do have those enchanted books if you want something specific?" you said but he shook his head "nah i'm doing it old fashioned" he said standing at the enchantment table and taking his time going through, enchanting each item with its purple iridescence.

"What did you get?" you asked, jumping around him excitedly and he hovered over each item. "Respiration on the helmet, projectile protection and unbreaking, wait I got unbreaking as well?" he asked looking at you through the facetime "it does that sometimes" you shrugged and he raised his eyebrows and hummed with the newfound knowledge. "Those on chestplate, protection on the jeans-" "leggings" "whatever, and feather falling on the boots" he said putting all his armor back on and going over his tools "efficiency on the pickaxe, efficiency on the axe, unbreaking on the hoe, unbreaking on the shovel, and fire aspect on the sword" he said stabbing a chicken that immediately went up in flames. "Roast chicken for life!" you cheered.

"Okay you have your full diamond now come to the nether" you said standing in the swirling portal and Izuku whined. "Literally what for!" he asked standing next to you despite his disinterest and the loading screen popped up. "For that Xp, gotta get that nether quartz" you said jumping to a clump of nether quartz and letting the green spheres fall on you watching the bar go up. "(y/n) What's the bridge for?" he asked walking over to the bridge ignoring the magma slime jumping toward you.

"What bri- AGH FUCK NO NO YOU CUBE FUCKING BITCH THINK YOU CAN JUMP ON ME LIKE I'M SOME WHORE WHO DO YOU THINK I AM" (A real thing i've said playing minecraft with my friends) he turned around just as the magma divided into 4 then each of those into another 4 until there were none. "Don't go on that bridge you will absolutely die" you warned and he backed up onto the bridge anyway. You were surprised he even made it halfway before a ghast needed to tell him his place and shoot him right into the neon orange below. "YOUR FUCKING KIDDING ME RIGHT"

Bonus content

Kaminari, bakugo, and kirishima all joined the call loading up minecraft not expecting to get an earful of your abuse to Izuku who was crying into his controller "I FUCKING TOLD YOU NOT TO GO ON THE BRIDGE BECAUSE A GHAST WOULD KNOCK YOU OFF BUT WHAT DID YOU DO. GO ON THE BRIDGE. I LITERALLY JUST GOT YOU THOSE DIAMONDS ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME YOU BROCCOLI. I WASTED MY FORTUNE BUFF ON YOU."

You loved him really. But you would never be taking him to the nether again.

A/n: What is your relationship with Izuku here? That's for you to decide. Also these are all things that have happened to me while in minecraft with my friends.

#bnha #mha fanfiction #my hero academia #bnha fanfiction #boku no hero academia #mha #mha deku #bnha deku #izuku midoria x reader #midoriya x reader #izuku x reader

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tmngoose · 4 years ago

Text

Nice Words: a Turtle Tots Drabble

Based on my headcanon. I’m sure there’s some errors, but w/e. It’s almost 3am :A! 1,632 word count. G-Rated. Tags include: sibling squabbles, sad feelings, happy endings, and hurt/comfort? Read it under the cut! (Once I get my Ao3 up and running it’s all over for y’all) :U

It was late in the afternoon when Splinter had finished making himself a cup of tea. As he placed Ol' Skelly back onto the stovetop, his ears pricked towards the kitchen's entrance, where he could distinctly hear the pitter-patter of feet tottering down the hallway, followed by a series of sharp whispers. "Boys," Splinter addressed, "Didn't I tell you four that you could only have your snacks after you tidied up your bedrooms?" It wouldn't have been the first time his turtle-children attempted to sneak into the snack cabinet and reward themselves for a job half-done. "U-Um, actually, it's just us three," Mikey answered meekly. Splinter raised a brow, "Three?" He turned around and spotted Raph, Leo, and Mikey huddled together in the doorway, their expressions mixed. "Where's Purple?" Raph pushed Leo forward, earning a scowl from his younger brother, "Leo and Donnie were fighting again, and then Donnie ran off somewhere!" "Tattle-tale," Leo grumbled, folding his arms with a huff. Splinter sighed, "Blue? I thought we talked about using our nice words towards each other?" He knelt before Leo, who fidgeted under his father's attention. "But I did!" Leo's passionate claim wavered. He guiltily stared down at his feet, "Well, I mean, I did at first. But he started it!" The slider's fire returned, only quelled by Splinter, who pressed a finger up to his mouth. "That's not important," Splinter said, "What's important now is finding your brother and setting things right." "But, we looked everywhere for him!" Mikey whimpered, tears threatening to spill from his watery eyes. Raph began counting off on his fingers, "We searched the bathroom, all of our bedrooms and the living room! I even looked inside your chair!" "I still think he could've flushed himself down the toilet," Leo mumbled to himself, earning another look of disapproval from Splinter. "Then, it sounds like you three have a lot of backtracking to do!" Splinter patted Mikey's shell and took a moment to dry the box turtle's tears with his sleeve. "But worry not, my sons, for I will help you." -x- What Splinter had promised was a half-truth. While his boys double-checked their bedrooms, Splinter took his cup of tea into the living room. He could keep an eye out for Donnie while also keeping an eye on his favorite TV show. Splinter shook his head upon discovering the state of disarray the living room was left in from Raph, Leo, and Mikey’s frantic search for Donnie. He decided he'd make the boys sort out the rest of the living room after supper. Splinter fixed the cushions of his armchair, made himself comfortable, sipped his tea, and then twirled the remote control between his fingers. Splinter's thumb hovered over the power button. Just before he could click it, there came a strange sound from close-by. Sniffle... It was a soft, sad sound that made Splinter's ears twitch. He listened carefully and heard nothing. He shrugged, pointed the remote at the projector screen, and- Sniff... sniffle... - there it was again! If Splinter was right, the noise was coming from beneath him? He slid out of his seat and checked underneath the armchair. "Purple?" Splinter blinked. "What are you doing under there?" Donnie turned away from Splinter, burrowing further into his hoodie until he eventually disappeared into his shell. He sniffled again, and Splinter frowned. "Surely, you can't be comfy down there?" Splinter held out his hand. "Why not come out and join me? We can watch Scorpion Treadmill together!" Splinter only needed to wait a few more seconds before he felt Donnie's hand lightly take ahold of his own. Splinter's fingers curled around the tiny hand and carefully helped Donnie out from under the recliner. Splinter kept his word. He plopped back down in his seat and placed Donnie on his lap, who was still tucked inside his shell. Splinter turned on the TV and sipped his tea once more, setting the cup and saucer down on Donnie's back. By the time the first commercial break came on, Donnie finally spoke up from within his shell, "Leo said he wished Laceface was his brother instead of me." Splinter looked down at Donnie and lowered the volume on the TV, "Laceface? Oh! You mean the football you boys are always breaking things with? Now, why would Blue say something like that?" "Because he's a big meanie," Donnie murmured sourly. "Now, Purple. What did we say about using our nice words towards each other?" "Well, he is!" Donnie's head popped out of his shell, his eyes puffy from crying. "Me 'n Mikey were playing Jupiter Jim when Leo and Raph crashed our game with their stupid Sports Ball game!" "Uh-huh," Splinter nodded, sipping his tea. "And then Leo's trick pass caused Raph to break our moon buggy!" "You don't say?" "So I told Leo he owed us a new moon buggy, but he said it wasn't his fault our moon buggy broke so easily cuz it's cardboard! So then I said to him that it was his fault because it was his dum-dum trick pass that caused Raph to break our moon buggy in the first place! And then Leo said his trick pass wasn't dumb, and that I was the dumb one!" Donnie went on. Splinter could see where all this was going. Indeed, it was a messy situation, though thankfully, he knew of a way to fix it. When Donnie finished recounting his side of the story, the young turtle was just as hurt when he had first hid under Splinter's armchair. Donnie lifted his glasses out of the way so he could wipe his eyes and swallowed the sob caught in his throat. "Who am I kidding?" Donnie's shoulders sagged with defeat. "They'd probably care more about Laceface than me." Splinter began rubbing Donnie's back, hoping to calm him down, "You know that's not true. Your brothers care very much about you, including Blue!" "Nuh-uh," Donnie shook his head in disbelief. "Yuh-huh," Splinter answered, "Why, surely you must've heard them tearing this room apart while they were looking for you?" "Well, yeah..." "Did you know they're still looking for you?" Splinter continued, "Why, they've been so worried about you!" "R-Really?" "Really," Splinter petted the top of Donnie's head. "Even Leo?" "Only one way to find out," Splinter cleared his throat, "BOYS!" Splinter's bellow echoed off the walls of the lair. Donnie could hear his siblings clumsily stumble over each other as they piled into the living room, though none of them dared to approach Splinter's armchair, and with good reason too: they still hadn't found Donnie. "Yeah, Pops?" Raph asked hesitantly. "Have you boys found Purple yet?" Splinter winked down at Donnie and signaled for him to stay quiet. Donnie, unsure of what Splinter was scheming, obediently covered his mouth with both of his hands. "Um, n-no, not yet," Mikey spoke up with a sad tremor in his throat. "Oh, that's too bad," Splinter lamented, "I suppose I will have to find you a new brother, huh? Maybe that football you boys love so much?" He mused aloud. "What?!" Raph gasped, "Replace Donnie?!" "With Laceface?!" Leo sounded just as upset as Raph and Mikey, which surprised Donnie. "You can't do that!" Leo protested. "Why not?" Splinter questioned. "Didn't you say you'd rather have Laceface as your brother anyway?" "W-Well, yeah, but... b-but...," Leo grew quiet, and then burst out crying; the weight of his guilt finally crashing down on him. "I don't want a football for a brother!! I d-didn't mean it when I said that! I want Donnie for a brother-," Leo's hiccuping stopped abruptly, "-wait a sec, how did you know I said that to Donnie?" "Because he told me," Splinter replied cheekily and held Donnie out over the side of his armchair for his brothers to see. "Donnie!!" Leo, Raph, and Mikey ran towards the soft-shell and tackled him out of Splinter's hands. They smothered Donnie in a great big heap on the floor; one could barely spot the soft-shell within the mess of arms as his brothers nuzzled him. At first, Donnie was uncomfortable. The hug was suffocating and almost unbearable until he noticed how happy and relieved his brothers were to have found him: including Leo. "I'm sorry, Donnie," apologized Leo, "I never meant any of it, honest!" "And I'm sorry too," Donnie gritted out, "B-but maybe you guys could st-stop squeezing me? M-My oxygen levels..." He squeaked helplessly. Splinter smiled, satisfied with their touching reunion, "I hope you all learned a valuable lesson today." "We sure did!" Raph beamed, "Donnie's the best at hide-and-seek!" "What? No!" Splinter shook his head, "Well, maybe, but that's not it! Sometimes, when we're angry, we say things to each other that we do not mean. That is why it is super-duper important to always use our nice words towards each other!" To the four turtle tots, their father spoke words of wisdom. Their eyes glistened in awe and respect. "Now then!" Splinter's tender fatherly disposition suddenly turned agitated and firm, "Why were you boys playing Jupiter Jim and Sports Ball in the first place?! Didn't I tell you to clean your rooms before my shows started?!" The turtle brothers yelped and scrambled out of the living room before Splinter could punish any of them. "Quick, Donnie!" Raph cried out, "Tell us your secret ways of hide-and-seek!" He held Donnie high above his head, leading the gang to his bedroom. "Yeah!" Leo agreed, "Dad can't punish us if he can't find us!" The turtle tots giggled and shrieked as they carried on their mischief elsewhere within the lair. Splinter shook his head. He reached for his tea and found that the last few sips had gone cold. Though that hardly mattered, for the laughter of his children warmed him all the same.

#rottmnt #turtle tots #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt raph #rottmnt donnie #rottmnt mikey #rottmnt leo #rottmnt splinter #leo #donnie #splinter #raph #mikey #rottmnt fic #laceface #lol gotta include laceface

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pynkhues · 5 years ago

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Since you're a writer, I'm hoping you can shed some light on this. IMO the writers were chasing viewers in S2 and trying not to get canceled. Personally, I hate when writers toy with their audience, it means they don't have a clear picture of their characters and narrative. How do you feel about writers making it up as they go?

Ah, this post got really long, anon! Since you asked me as a writer, I’m answering as one (I hope you don’t mind! I also hope this doesnt come out as too Creative Writing 101 for people either. This is just lessons I’ve learned and use in my own practice, so I’m applying them here.)

(Also I have drawn horrible diagrams on my very pink notebook paper - I am so sorry, haha)

So first thing’s first - no. I don’t think the writers were chasing viewers (at least not beyond the way any writer is wanting an audience), and I don’t think they were making it up as they go really, but I can understand why you would think that way!

It won’t be a surprise to anyone that I love this show a lot, but coming from it as both a writer and editor - this show does have narrative problems, and the biggest ones, particularly in s2, are in execution, escalation and pacing.

I think heading into the season they had certain character arcs they wanted to follow which married well with the story they wanted to tell. In particular, I actually think the writers have a very strong handle on the girls (I will say that I’ve had a few asks telling me Beth’s characterisation is all over the place, which I’m curious about, just because I personally find her very consistent, and when I’ve asked for clarification, I’ve never gotten any reply, so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)

I mean, look at their s2 arcs on paper, right?

Ruby tries to negotiate Stan’s lowered opinion of her after the reveal of what she’s done, then has to negotiate him telling her to turn Beth and Annie in. She manages the situation painfully but pulls them through and they’re close again as Ruby navigates the increasingly lower depths of their crime life. When Stan acts to save Beth for Ruby and is arrested, it only escalates – the case on him driving Ruby to extremes to try and save him, including robbing a Quick Cash and using counterfeit money to bribe a lawyer. On top of that, she’s being targeted by an FBI agent who’s after her best friend who she gives up and then saves and then who tries to sacrifice herself for them. Ruby finishes the season the most morally compromised she’s ever been.

Annie gets back together with her ex only to find out that he’s gotten his not-quite-separated-wife pregnant. She splits up with him, but is heartbroken and it’s only amplified by the fact that they’ve been given a job by their Crime Boss to murder a man who tried to rape her but who’s grandmother she has a relationship with. Her sister can’t kill him, and Annie doesn’t get the chance as MP beats her to it. Upon disposing of the body though she endures a whole lot of pain as a result of both her ex’s new family and knowing she’s robbed a woman of her own. Annie goes on a guilt tour – tells her son, helps Marion, helps Nancy only to eventually find an absolver of her guilt in Noah, who builds her up and tells her she’s more than what life has given her. She lets herself have it for a while, before realising he’s FBI and there to trap her, and Annie tries to use him only to realise she can’t, and she finishes the season in a lot more hurt than she started it.

Beth struggles with guilt after getting Dean shot, gets the job to kill Boomer from Rio, can’t do it, gets support and encouragement from him (in various states of animosity), but in the end doesn’t have to find out if she can do it because MP does it instead. She’s rewarded by Rio in a way she probably never has been by anyone, her husband further subjugates her, so she has sex with Rio, starts to entertain a future with him, but he undermines her, so she seizes control from him. They work together. Dean forces her to break up with him due to jealousy, she struggles, goes back, but Rio’s stung, so unhelpful, and they play a little cat and mouse before he bails then kidnaps her and she shoots him.

With the exception of that very last sentence, I think all of those are narratively really strong pathways to have explored. Like I said above though, the issue is in execution, escalation and pacing.

But to talk about those things, I think I probably need to talk about story.

SO!

Stories have a shape.

Kurt Vonnegut talks extensively about this, and while he’ll talk about a few different types of story shapes, they really all boil down to this bad boy here:

Look at this guy.

What a beautiful thing.

He’s a story.

It doesn’t matter if you’re reading Dr Seuss or Charles Dickens, when you read a story – when you strip away its words and its characters and its settings – this is what it looks like.

Or, well.

Not quite.

Really, it’s this guy:

But we’ll talk about him in a sec.

Right now, let’s talk about that first little inch:

The Beginning

The fact that stories have a beginning is not a surprise to anyone. Stories need them. In some ways, they’re the most important part of your story. After all, the job of the beginning is to set up the world your protagonist is about to leave behind. That is essential in grounding a reader / viewer – orienting them to the world that they’re in, and getting them invested in the story you’re about to tell, if not the protagonist.

Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, Star Wars, Game of Thrones are all excellent example of this (and frequently used in teaching) because in each of these cases it’s literal. Frodo leaves Bag End, Harry leave Privet Drive, Luke leaves Tatooine, the Starks leave Winterfell. There is a literal departure from the world before the crux of the story, and that departure is what signifies the start of the ‘hero journey’ aka the main part of your narrative.

Of course, it’s not always literal – in fact, it’s usually not. Usually that world is symbolic – it’s the single, uncertain world before the Bingley’s buy the house next door in Pride and Prejudice or the dry domestic sphere of Breaking Bad before Walt decides to make meth. It’s a marked shift, whether that’s internal or external.

In Good Girls, it’s internal.

The beginning is actually pretty perfect. The world it sets up that we’re about to (try to) depart is one of struggle and invisibility.

Beth’s in a loveless marriage promptly discovering that her husband is not only cheating but about to leave them destitute, Ruby’s getting ignored by the healthcare system and can’t afford to pay for her daughter’s wellbeing, and Annie is in a dead end job about to lose custody of her child.

Writing-wise – as a beginning, I honestly think 1.01 is close to perfect.

It sets up who these characters are, their personal conflicts, and the story world they share together, and the worlds they have on their own i.e. Ruby at the hospital and the diner, Annie at Fine and Frugal, Beth with Dean and Boland Motors.

Then:

BOOM

Inciting Incident.

The inciting incident is also often called The Point of No Return.

When I’m teaching, I personally like to call it the “You’re a wizard!” moment.

It’s when something happens that means everything set up in the beginning will be changed forever. It’s Romeo meeting Juliet, it’s Katniss volunteering for Prim, it’s Frodo deciding to take the ring to Mordor, it’s Jaimie pushing a child out a window, it’s Beth – deciding to take her little sister’s joke seriously and rob a grocery store.

(Again, I like to use Harry Potter because it’s literal – there is no return for Harry after hearing Hagrid tell him he’s a wizard. Everything is changed forever).

Inciting incidents are probably the most singularly important narrative moment, because they’re what everything else tumbles out of. Pretty much everything that happens in the story should be a direct or indirect result of the inciting incident. The inciting incident is ultimately the key of the story and what should unlock the overall arc.

When it comes to a series – whether that be a TV series, movie series or book series, each individual instalment (see: season of a show) should have its own inciting incident which – preferably – builds off the one established in the first instalment.

The Hunger Games does this really well. Katniss and Peeta being brought back into the games in Catching Fire is both an imitation inciting incident which allows the author to explore the story world further in an exciting way, and also an inciting incident that’s directly borne out of the first book / film – aka Katniss pissed enough people off during the first games that they’re going to try and kill her for real this time, which in turn gives us the opportunity to explore Katniss’ trauma, the ramifications of her actions in the first book on the broader story world, and to generate a new, compelling chapter based off of both.

Good Girls has a terrific inciting incident in s1 – which is Beth realising she’s about to lose everything.

That is our narrative point of no return.

And it works on a lot of levels – it establishes Beth as the driving engine of the story, fuelled by the chorus motivations of Annie and Ruby, rounding off both their collective and individual stakes, it sets us up for a strong narrative spine and solid characterisations.

Good Girls actually also has a terrific inciting incident in s2, which operates strongly on its own while also building firmly off the character arcs of s1.

The s2 inciting incident is Rio showing up on that park bench with Marcus, a gun and an order.

The story pivots here – giving Rio a lot of narrative thrust (get your minds out of the gutter kids), and making him a sort of secondary story engine. The core engine is still Beth, but her life is different now. She’s been traumatised and she’s exhausted, but Rio revealing his son to the girls (and tying their motivations up together in a neat little package) while forcing her to act, re-establishes her as the person who’s decisions are going to be the driving force of the narrative.

Ruby and Annie are, of course, story engines in their own right too, but they fall into line behind Beth usually, and their narrative push is actually usually away from the story throughline, but we’ll talk about that in a sec.

Rising Tension / The Middle

Okay, this is where things get a little tricky.

Do you remember this guy?

When we talk about stories, rising tension / the middle is the big guy. It’s the bulk of your narrative. It’s Where Things Happen. It’s where all the ugly stuff set up in your beginning and exploded by your inciting incident just - - grows a life of it’s own.

Or - -

Well.

Maybe not.

Forget about this guy.

Rising tension is this:

Rising tension is a series of ‘mini climaxes’ on the way to the main climax that raises the stakes, lets you know characters better, and pushes your characters onwards to the main climax.

Each of these little climaxes should be followed by a ‘narrative rest’. (that’s the dip after each spike)

Which - - I don’t know, might sound weird? I know when I started writing I was like ?? but it’s true! The closer you get to a big narrative climax, the more important rests are! Rests are – I personally think – one of the most important components of storytelling, because they re-ground an audience, remind them of what’s at stake, before thrusting everyone back into danger.

Again, Harry Potter is a gift in this sense because this is all really clearly paced out. Think about the first instalment – Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s / Sorcerer’s Stone.

Harry and Ron save Hermione and Ron from the troll!!!

Then they become friends and enjoy school and quidditch.

Harry loses control of his broom during a quidditch game!!!!

He’s okay and then it’s Christmas and Harry gets the invisibility cloak and feels connected to his parents for perhaps the first time in his life.

Harry, Hermione and Ron go through the trapdoor to get the philosopher’s stone!!!

And - - okay, you get the point.

Each mini climax ups the stakes, but we feel those stakes upped because of the time we spend with characters during the ‘narrative rest’. For instance, while Harry and Ron saving Hermione from the troll might have sparked an interest in her, it’s the narrative rest scenes between that and her setting Snape on fire during the quidditch game that makes us invest in her as a character.

This is where things get a bit hairy with Good Girls. Good Girls does a tremendous job of giving us both great climaxes and wonderful moments of narrative rest. The issue, for me at least, is that it’s not always the best at balancing them. When I talk about escalation and pacing, this is a big part of what I mean.

Remember how I said this was the shape of a story?

Well, I think Good Girls s2 looked more like this:

We had a lot of solid movement in the first half of the season that sort of flattened out into a lower stakes, more meandering middle (which gave us 2.08 through 2.12). Which - -

Look.

The story changed gear, and it didn’t work.

Think of it this way:

2.01 – mostly character-based fallout from s1 + inciting incident of Rio handing them the gun

2.02 – almost entirely rising tension culminating with the girls bribing Boomer and Beth lying to Rio

2.03 – which thrusts us straight back into rising tension with the girls trying to kill Boomer and ‘succeeding’ via Mary Pat

2.04 – which gives us a very satisfying narrative rest as we explore Rio and Beth’s relationship outside of an overall narrative thrust – he gives her a key, she shies away from him, only to fall entirely back into him culminating in sex which itself brings about a new climax (no pun intended!) in the scene with Beth, Rio and Dean at the dealership. It’s also a strong character episode in closing certain plot threads – ending Annie and Greg’s relationship + ending Ruby lying to Stan about what they’re doing – while establishing major new threads – i.e. really colliding Turner and Mary Pat.

2.05 – and after the rest, we’re back to almost entirely satisfying rising tension! Building off of the threat of finding Boomer’s body and the new tensions that Rio and Beth’s intimacy brings.

2.06 – a mix episode! Very much building to the strong climax of Beth seizing power, but also an episode that plays around with character, has a lot of strong ‘rest’ moments i.e. the girls sorting pills and talking which gives us a lot of information as to state of minds, etc.

2.07 – again, very strong mixed episode which is focused on one single, extreme climax – Jane being missing, but building a very character-centric episode around it. Also introduces Noah though? Which is a mistake. He should have been introduced - I think, in 2.05, but that feels like a whole other post.

2.08 – narratively speaking the same as 2.07 in the sense of a single climax (the girls failing to get the money back / the Beth-Ruby confrontation), but has the added bonus of flashbacks.

2.09 – we have a slight narrative thrust with the robbery of the Quick Cash but it proves very quickly to be low stakes. This is an alllll emotional stakes episode, which means narrative tension is slowing.

2.10 – again, a character-focused, narrative rest episode devoted to Beth struggling with getting square. A few small climaxes – Annie and Ruby in Canada and Turner at the dealership being the big ones, but both quickly prove toothless. The heft / strength of the episode again is in character moments, not narrative thrust. Again - slowing it down.

2.11 – oh, what do we have here? Another character-focused, narrative rest episode? I love this episode – it’s one of my favourites of the show, but it’s intensely character focused. Very much centred in waving away the smoke around both Noah and Rio for Annie and Beth respectively. No dramatic climaxes. Slowing the story down even further.

2.12 – another narrative rest episode. A lot of slow exposition of Mary Pat and Jeff, which is good to know, but I’d argue placed badly in the season. This season’s already been slowing down despite the narrative timeline tightening, but this episode only further pushes on the brakes for Dean’s new job, Beth and Dean’s divorce, Beth and Rio’s break up. Two very small climaxes - the lawyer telling Ruby he knows about the money and the Boomer reveal but - in the context of the season - actually pretty low stakes. Again. Slowing down the narrative.

2.13 – A BIG CLIMAX EPISODE WHAT IS GOING ON???

What I’m saying in this is that the pacing in the back half of the season was, to me at least, fundamentally off. They hadn’t steered a strong enough narrative spine to take us through the season, and got heavily invested in character moments and not-entirely-thought-out-fallout in the back half of the season – it didn’t understand it’s own narrative thrust well enough to get us through. It also established a certain pacing with us in the first half of the season and shifted gears halfway through.

You can’t have your first three or six episodes be high-stakes-high-action, and then make the back end of your season same-stakes-low-action and top it all off with an explosive, poorly built-up finale in the way that they did.

There wasn’t enough thrust to push us through to the scene in Rio’s loft – neither narratively or in a character sense, and as a result, those last few episodes fall apart. Even beyond that though, the season escalated quickly then - - didn’t really know what to do with those escalations? It plateaued, which is indicative of bad pacing across the season.

I actually do think it’d be a relatively easy fix? I’d bring the Noah arc forwards and actually fiddle with the Beth and Rio break ups - get one even closer the tinale and make it more painful. Make it a climax in itself.

But anyway, haha:

The Resolution

All stories have a resolution too of course.

The resolution can be 30 seconds or 30 minutes – it’s a time to tie up loose ends and to reassure your audience that the journey they’ve been on is worthwhile.

(After all – you’ll notice the story diagram is not symmetrical – we never finish where we began).

I’m not going to talk too much about resolutions because at the end of the day – resolutions should fall fairly naturally out of your beginning, your inciting incident, your rising tension. It should tumble out like the double wedding at the end of Pride and Prejudice, but I will say that the s2 resolution was...err, not good. In no small part because it didn’t fall out of what we’d been told all season. They’d established a certain throughline and then taken it back, and that was nagl to be honest.

On the plus side though - it wasn’t a finale, so I have my fingers crossed they can fix it!

But yes, back to your ask, anon.

No, I don’t think that the writers were pandering. I think they went in with a sketched outline and that they probably got lost in the back end of the season and weren’t quite sure how to drum up the final act, which meant that final act didn’t work.

Ah, this post got so long! I hope it wasn’t boring or too self-indulgent or silly, and that you got something out of it! I am, of course, always happy to answer writing questions, and I hope you liked reading my story ramblings ;-)

#writing posts #gg season 2 #welcome to my ama

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judgement-free-sideblog · 5 years ago

Text

Dancing lessons.

Barry Berkman x reader

Hi there! So I was watching Friends yesterday and I came across the one where Joey speaks french, and then I was thinking about how in season 2 Barry already has his Headshots, and I wanted to write something about a false ability he could have put on his resume.

So this will be an 8 part series, and I will try to update it at least twice a week but can't promise anything.

Summary: Barry is finally cast in a feature, the problem? He said he could dance and now he can either disappoint Sally or found a way to learn some steps.

Warnings: Swearing, cheating maybe.

Part 1 ● Part 2 ● Part 3 ● Part 4 ● Part 5 ● Part 6 ● Part 7 ● Part 8 ● Epilogue

Part 1

A sharpie written ad in the door said: "Joe's friend callbacks" that could give him an idea of how unimportant this character was, because so far he didn't even had a name, nevertheless he was happy that they had call him back for a reason other than "You look good on the poster"

Although he was suspicious the "minor" changes Natalie and Sally had convinced him to do to his resume was the reason, he could not blame them, at first the page was empty and depressing, and now he appear to be a very compelling person, maybe someone he would like to be. Someone who could speak french and Italian, and had formal training in at least three styles of dancing, tango, salsa and tap.

Worst case scenario, they had said, there is someone better than you first and is just another bad audition. And so far it hasn't been a problem, people usually overlook that because they didn't need that on their movies.

But now it was different, there was at least three men in front of him and four behind all of them more or less his height and complexion, waiting to re read the lines for the upcoming movie, a place to dare dreaming. As far as he understood it was a drama about a men seeking meaning in life, and Barry was trying to be the best friend's best friend, he would have five scenes in the whole movie and was merely an excuse to make exposition questions and be gone for the rest of the movie.

Not a bad place to start, Sally said, and he might actually make connections and even find an agent. So he was there for some reason dressed with black loose pants and a loose blue shirt, just like the rest of them. Finally after another half hour or so the casting assistant exited the door and call for him.

"Hi, I'm Barry Block, reading for Joe's friend" He said looking at the people behind the table and he notice another woman there dressed as a ballerina, he was not entirely sure why.

"Fine, in this scene you are just finishing dancing with your partner, then Joe" The director point at a man who was already cast as the lead best friend "Yeah, Joe will call you to ask you something and then the scene starts"

Barry did as he was told, and when he was in the middle of telling Joe to go help the lead build the boat of his dreams or something like that the director interrupted him.

"Just one sec, Barry was it?" He said and Barry was already feeling the whole you are not what we are looking for speech coming. "It says here that you dance?"

"Um hum" He muttered every second more disconcerted.

"Tango? Janice you do tango right?" He asked the ballerina.

"No Andre, I only have a career in dance but I don't do tango" She said rolling her eyes "Of course I do" she and when the director look at her in exasperation.

"Then is settled, unless any of the other guys can dance we will go with Mr. Block here"

"Excuse me what?" Barry said a little lightheaded.

"Oh this scene, we originally wanted to have a big ballet dancing sequence that inspire Daniel, the lead to follow his dreams, but we scratched off because of the budget but since you can dance you and Janice can do a small version of it." Talk with Sophie on the way out we start on monday.

"Sure, thanks" he said with a calm voice and walked out to find the cast assistant.

"Mr. Block?" She said now a little more nice than when he entered in the morning. "You'll have to sing some documents and we will be ready"

"Sure, yeah fine, one question tho, what exactly does he mean Andre with me dancing with Janice?" He asked trying to sound casual

"Oh well since they are just adding the sequence I will say that they will tell you exactly what they want in a couple weeks and then you will have to rehearse with Janice and film it by the end of the next month" She said like it was no big deal.

"Two weeks?" He asked again and she could see that he was nervous.

"More or less, but I figure since you are an actual dancer that would be fine right?" He nod not very sure of her statement and she start looking in her purse and finally give him a card. "Look I won't tell you how to do your job, but if by any chance you are not convinced of what to do, you should go here, she may help you"

***

He shut the door of the apartment with enough strength to make one of the frames in the wall shake, of course he was furious. But it wasn't your fault and you wouldn't put up with his temperament. After 5 years of marriage Alan was finally beginning to understand that it was better to walk away and let things cool down before any of you could say something too painful.

And what could you say? You told him before you get married that you didn't want children and he married you anyway. He was not able to change your mind, that was no reason to scream and fight like that. You shake the thoughts from your head and pick up you bag, ready to walk down to the studio.

Your friend Sophie had made you a call earlier asking for your help with another lost case, and usually those pay well so you could surprise Alan with a nice dinner and maybe you would let him convince you to open up at the idea, at least for long enough to live peacefully.

You could tell who your new student was the minute you entered the studio, your assistant was talking with the other couples for the romantic dance lessons and he was in a corner looking at the door like he was planning an escape.

You take the attending list and seek for his name, Barry Block, you hope is not a sing of how hard will it be to make him move, but his large frame was telling you it will.

"Mr. Block?" You called him apart once you were dress in more comfortable clothes, he walked towards you and you could see he was at least 1 feet taller than you. "You work with Sophie right?"

"I do, I ... she said you could help me amm..."

"To make your dancing believable, yes, don't worry you are not the first nor the last actor that lies on an audition, but for future reference put something more achievable like learn Russian" You said part serious part kidding "Learning tango is complicated and demanding, is not just sexy dresses and fancy music, but since this is the land of dreams I can teach you a couple things"

"That would be great, and again I'm so embarrassed that this happened, but I need the job"

"Well that's another sad part of the story this class ain't cheap, and there's only so little I can do for you in three weeks"

"That's not a problem" He said immediately and took a little envelope from his pocket and gave it to you "This is for the first two lessons"

"Excellent, then we can start" You look at his clothes, jeans and a hoodie and very uncomfortable sneakers "You may need to change, and also stretch a little, we don't want accidents" you pointed to the dressing room and let him borrow a more lose pant and proper dancing shoes.

You finishes your lesson with the other couples and after and hour he, you and Macy your assistant were the only ones there.

"Ok for starters, that's not stretching" you told him once you saw he couldn't reach his toes. "Come sit here" You told him and sit in the middle of the floor with your legs completely extended and asked him to do the same.

"I'm not very use to this, I'm in shape as much as I can but this is different" He said awkwardly trying to reach his toes the way you did yours.

"If you don't mind me asking Mr. Block, why do you need the job?" You said standing up and helping him bend his back. "I don't think they will pay you more than I'm taking from you"

"Is not about the money" he said simply and took the hand you offered him to stand. "I need to prove myself I can be an actor, a real one, also my girlfriend is recording a show and I..." he star touching his hair distracted.

"You don't want to be left behind? Yeah I know what is like" You said to him. "Well in that case I would do my best, but for real you have to stop being so rigid" you said taking him by the hips and he flinch with surprise to then let go a chuckle

"I'm sorry" He said and you nodded and put your hands on his hips again "First we are going to have to work on that posture, lower just a bit your hips and bend your knees" You said pushing him down a bit.

"Like this" he said flexing down so much that he was almost at your height.

"Not at all, I'll show you, Macy come here" You call the girl who was already hiding her laugh behind a magazine, she put on some music on his phone into the speakers and walked towards you.

You took her by the waist and started just making simple walks at the rhythm of the music, showing him how he had to bend his knees but not making it all that evident, then when the next song star going faster you started making more quick moves and shen it turn slow you drag your leg inside slowly, and embraced Macy pulling her closer to you.

"Ok, I can definently not do that" he said once you were done, and you felt flattered to se some amusement in his face.

"I know, but we will figure something out" you smile at him and turn off the music to again trying to make him bend his knees properly.

#barry berkman x reader #barry block #barry hbo #barry berkman #barry berkman edit #Bill Hader #barry fanfiction #dance #tango #angst #comedy #drama #romance #sally reed

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hinatastinygiant · 2 years ago

Text

Chapter Twenty Six

Platycodon

Pairing: Atsumu Miya x Fem!Reader

previous | next | black canary

After your talk with Daisho, you drive back to Atsumu's house and gather up the money you've earned so far. Atsumu isn't around thankfully, but you gather your things quickly. You then drive off to the nearby mall's parking lot and wait in your car with the doors locked. About five minutes later, there's a knock on your passager side door. You look over to make sure you know who it is before unlocking the door. He then opens it up and steps into your car.

"Hello, Y/N," he greets you as he shuts the door behind himself.

"Kuroko. I'm sorry for meeting like this but I'm at the point where I don't know who I can trust anymore," you tell him.

"Is this about Osamu's disappearance or about the money you owe me?" he asks calmly.

"Listen, it wasn't until recently that I found out why our two gangs never got along. It's quite clear to me now that my dad was a total asshole and he clearly overstepped his boundaries. There's nothing more in my power that I can do to show you my apology besides promising you that it will no longer continue to happen. I will make sure you get back what is rightfully yours and make sure it's known within my syndicate to stay within the confines of our syndicate's domain," you explain sincerely.

Kuroko nods once you're finished speaking. "You make quite a good leader, Y/N. I accept your apology and do hope that our syndicates can get along in the future after, of course, you pay what is owed."

"I thought you would say that," you begin as you reach into the back part of your car, "but this really is an emergency. You see, I recently found out what happened to Osamu. I believe that two of my kyodai's, Oikawa and Ushijima, worked together to murder him."

You pull up a black backpack and place it into your lap. You then unzip it and show Kuroko all of the money you had worked so hard to earn within the past few weeks.

"I know it's not everything, but I will stop the killing, stop the stealing," you plead to him.

"In exchange for?..."

"I want them both dead. Oikawa and Ushijima," you admit bluntly.

"Okay, well do you have some kind of plan? You can't just spring that on me with no real plan and expect me to be on board with the whole thing," he replies.

"We'll meet at the end of this week. I'll tell my syndicate that I didn't give you the money in time and that you are planning to come for me. Oikawa and Ushijima will of course be on the frontlines of this battle. When the time's right, we'll turn on them," you explain a bit scatterbrained.

"And what do you expect us to do in the meantime? Kill each other or sing while we're all holding hands and skipping in a circle?" He then takes a moment to pause and realize what he said is so unlike him. "Sorry, kinda sounded like Aomine there for a sec... Anyways, what do you want me to do?"

"Make it look like a real fight," you tell him. "I'll get my hands dirty, too, I won't just sit back and watch. But I'll give my kyodai's a heads up before we go. Like I said before, I don't plan on letting you lose anyone else."

"And after it's done?" he asks.

"I won't be as forgiving as I was when Daisho murdered my father and my brother. I learned my lesson about being too soft from that," you smile.

"Good. I wouldn't want our work to be all for nothing," he nods in agreement with you. "Let's meet up again soon. I mean, apart from this fight. I enjoy listening to your ideas, they're quite interesting. I wish nothing but the best for a benevolent leader like yourself. See you on Saturday," he then smiles as he takes the backpack from you and zips it up. "Consider us even after this, yeah?"

"Are you sure? All I've done is ask more of you," you sigh.

"I'm sure," he grins once more. "Get home safely!"

Kuroko then steps out and slings the backpack over his shoulder. You watch as he walks away to his car, waiting for him to get inside before you pull out of the lot. You then drive out and head back to Atsumu's house.

When you arrive, you pull out your phone from your back pocket and see that Atsumu's called you twice and sent you a few messages asking where you are. You sigh knowing that you lied to him about where you went and that you'll need to tell him the truth. Besides, you were supposed to be home early to have dinner with him.

The second you open the front door and step inside, you hear Atsumu rushing in your direction. By the time your shoes are off, he slides around the corner and almost slips as he runs in your direction.

"Are you alright?" he asks. "You've been out since this morning. Where'd you go?"

"I wasn't out all day," you say to avoid the inevitable. "I came back a little while ago and you weren't home."

"I went to the casino. I thought maybe you had gone there. But Aoi said she hadn't seen you all day. You said you were going out with your friends!" he tries to say calmly without prying too much, but his nerves are showing right through.

"I know, I'm sorry," you say as you step up from the genkan and walk past him towards the living room. "I should have told you that I was going out with Oikawa but I didn't want you to worry and get all weir-"

"You went out with that asshole again?! Y/N, I'm telling you something's shady about that guy!"

"I know that, Tsumu! If you just let me explain, then I can-" you stop as you turn around and almost bump right into him.

"What's wrong," he asks as he looks at you intensely. "What happened? Did he do something to you? He tried something, didn't he?"

"Calm down, I'm trying to tell you!" you groan. "I'm perfectly fine. Will you let me explain?"

"Yeah, sorry. I'm sorry, Y/N," he replies as he shakes his head. "Go ahead, I'm ready to listen."

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pineappleatoz · 3 years ago

Text

struggles

Back to my old mate here, Tumblr.

I don't know, there are so many websites but I feel comfortable writing here. Keeping my cloud diary so I can re-read what I wrote in the past.

It was 2 years ago when the pandemic hit. Life wasn't normal. It's not the same anymore. we struggled and here we are facing the life we never imagined before. yet, we survived! Honestly, I never thought that this year is going to be another challenge. with my mom's condition, me, my sisters, and my dad were covid positive. she felt alone that time as we usually be there for her talking to her (well, she could only stay in bed because her condition is getting worse).

I felt really thankful because by that time God showered us with full attention from people around us. they kept sending us their sincere prayers, so many fruits, food, medicines, etc.

But then, I lost some of my side hustles. Which lead me to rock bottom. My living expenses are quite big right now and I lost half of my income. Of course, I know. I again need to be thankful because it's only half of my income, not all of it. But it hits me hard. I don't know where else should I find it. Like I kept on trying this and that but God hasn't opened His door for me yet.

I keep telling myself that it will be alright. God has His plan. He planned everything in so much detail until you can't guess what's in the future. or what after this? This could be a lesson for me to learn. I might not understand it right now but somehow I know that I have to have faith that something wonderful awaits.

sadness wouldn't last forever right? why would I care about my sadness so much. Why would I worry that I couldn't get through it all.

Now my mom isn't on her best condition. she needs to see the psychiatrist because of her hallucinations and unstable emotions.

I feel mentally exhausted. I couldn't think clearly. I don't know what to do. All I can do is to work, work, work, and work to distract me from the real world that I have around me. I need to keep myself busy so I don't dragged to the dark side. I don't wanna get bitter. I know that I have to admit that I am so upset right now. I am not alright. I am not positive at all.

They're right, we have to cherish every moment. cause it could change in a blink of an eye. You might lost everything you've built in a sec. then what would you do? You grief? but you would not get them back like before. Life goes on. You need to keep walking and face it. Chin up! no giving up, cause life give you no choice. You can't just end your life because you have nothing else. despite, is it really nothing? or you just can't see the good side because of those bad things happened to you?

I still believe with this quote, "the harder you fall the higher you bounce." That is the quote that keeps me believing in myself and knowing that the great things await me! This believe gives me strength to stand up and walk again until it all great again.

Why? Even though it feels hard, I know those stuff made me who I am now. the stronger me, the wiser me.

So I will surrender and walk through this path with all my heart. I won't waste my energy for something that out of my control. Because again I know that there's every cloud has a silver lining, the sun will shine again soon.

#pineappleatoz #journal #pandemic life #lifelessons #family #writes #self help #selfreminder #self care #self love #selfworth

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lefthanded-sans · 7 years ago

Note

Don't forget the Garrus analysis!

There’s no Shepard without Vakarian: An analysis of Garrus’ characterization in the Mass Effect franchise

Oh yes, thank you, Mun! During yesterday’s stream I commented I could write an analysis on how Garrus’ character arc is in many ways unusual, both within the Mass Effect franchise’s brand of storytelling, and in the broader scheme of how narratives tend to characterize principle personalities. Most main characters are given a significant arc that grows them greatly as an individual. By the end of the tale, they have actualized into someone with more experiences, abilities, and integrity. They stand on their own stronger than before. Garrus’ arc, interestingly enough, focuses less on him growing by himself, but rather him growing closer to Shepard.

A more typical characterization arc is found for most Mass Effect squadmates (especially those introduced in ME 2). It’s brilliant - large plot threads from major political scuffles, to individual personality plot threads of character internal conflict - are given arc, development, and wrap-up by ME 3. Mainly, squadmates are given a central conflict that is developed and resolved by the end of the storyline. To give a few examples:

Grunt is introduced with the problem of needing identity. He needs to become actualized as his own, personal krogan. By joining Clan Urdnot and leading the Aralakh Company, he becomes that krogan with a proud, personal, found identity.

Mordin’s character arc is wrapped around his complicated, conflicted logic and emotions regarding the genophage - whether it was, in fact, the correct choice to make. As much as his emotions and logic mostly agree that the second genophage was the correct move, his internal discomfort suggests that he’s not as settled in this choice as he should be. He’s still struggling. His logic and emotions come to a common goal to cure the krogan genophage in ME 3, leading him to internal peace. He goes from someone who sterilized the krogan, helping continue the collapse of krogan civilization… to their hero.

Miranda’s arc is focused around struggles with her abusive father. In the end, she can help her sister and stop Mr. Lawson once and for all.

Jacob struggles with the question of whether or not allying with a shady organization like Cerberus is okay so long as their mission goals are profitable and get the job done. His suspicions in ME 2 lead to worse experiences in ME 3; he leaves the organization and puts behind this conflict once and for all.

Wrex’s arc is about becoming a revolutionary leader. Shepard meets him after he gave up leading a small krogan clan. But he becomes reinspired to try to build his people into a stronger civilization, a stronger future.

Jack is introduced with emotional scars from an abusive past. As a child she was abused and exploited for her biotics. In the end, Jack helps nurture other biotic children into a greater future.

And so we can go through almost all squadmates this way: Ashley / Kaidan regarding trust, Samara regarding her Ardat-Yakshi familial legacy, Thane regarding his family and illness, EDI regarding what it means to be a sentient non-organic, etc. Characters are given a central problem, which they grow through and overcome.

But Garrus, I feel… is a little different.

Garrus’ arc is centered around the idea “There’s no Shepard without Vakarian.”

Now, it’s true Garrus has a few overarching problems he needs to handle throughout the franchise. It mainly involves his sense of enacting justice outside the scope of regulations. In the first game, he wants to hunt down Dr. Saleon, who got away because C-Sec regulations forbid Garrus from making risky capture moves the first time. In the second game, Garrus wants vengeance for Sidonis’ betrayal. Several times, Garrus plays a turian Robin Hood-esque character: he skirts the law and does his own vigilante thing to enact justice and punish immoral lawbreakers who have harmed others.

The thing is, these incidences are framed secondarily to Garrus’ main narrative contribution. These narrative arcs are used to reinforce Garrus’ attachment to Shepard.

Garrus does learn and grow based upon how Dr. Saleon and Sidonis are handled, yes. He’ll reach different conclusions depending upon whether you take Renegade or Paragon dialogue choices, but regardless, Garrus takes away these incidences as life lessons... life lessons pulled to him largely by Shepard’s sense of justice. Results of the Dr. Saleon mission come from Shepard’s guidance and philosophy, ideas that Garrus take to heart and mull over. The same sort of thing happens with Sidonis. Shepard’s interactions in these missions influence how Garrus thinks. He reflects upon the missions and (no matter what path players take) ultimately reaches the conclusion Shepard has a point. He aligns his thinking more with Shepard after each incident. Thus, Garrus’ experiences on the missions with Shepard aren’t about Garrus growing beyond a problem… so much as it leads him to become more synced with and loyal to Shepard.

Even the problem of Garrus’ imperfect relation with his father ultimately ties up to him building a bond with Shepard. In the first game, Garrus mentions that his father didn’t approve of Garrus taking Spectre training, so Garrus found himself as a C-Sec officer instead… albeit one who didn’t play by the books as his father did. That leads him to be interested in working with a Spectre and leaving C-Sec... all driving him to Shepard. Garrus does eventually go to his father by ME 3 - a surprising development - and tell his father about his ventures and the upcoming Reaper threat. Garrus gains his own task force to handle the Reapers and lead… which pulls him back into the central war efforts with Shepard. He’s yet again a squadmate with humanity’s first Spectre. Everything Garrus does ultimately draws him back to the Normandy.

All of Garrus’ problems in 1 and 2 are written to build that bond between Shepard and Vakarian. It’s fascinating - his character growth arc isn’t about one specific personal problem to characterize through, so much as it is about him aligning with someone else.

In this sense, the Shadow Broker’s dossier on Garrus is curious commentary on his characterization arc. The dossier begins:

Former C-Sec officer. Exceptional tactical and team-building skills. Leadership potential overshadowed by Shepard. Unlikely to fully develop under Shepard’s command.

Now Garrus does gain and expose these skills solo. He creates his team on Omega. He directs forces during the start of the war with the Reapers. But that is never where he fully actualizes, fully shines. Garrus being with Shepard is never narratively shown as a limitation, but contrarily, Garrus apart from Shepard is where he is shown to be weakest and most out-of-his-zone.

Characters out of their element can be one means of growth - it’s hard to grow unless you’re out of your comfort zone, after all - but it can also signify they’re not where they’re supposed to be. The latter is primarily how Garrus’ time apart from Shepard is depicted. If anything, his experiences on Omega worsen him into someone more emotionally unstable, hurt, and raw. And instead of it being a time where Garrus notably actualizes, it feels like a somewhat stagnant period of his life, where he’s living active inactivity, trying to figure out what to do now that Shepard is dead. Shepard reuniting with Garrus on Omega is one where Garrus is in a tight and unpleasant spot. He demonstrates he can lead and build a team like Shepard, but his experience also isn’t the one where he is depicted at his best and most heroic. He gains more motivation, resolve, and heroics when he joins the suicide Cerberus mission - he’s not just picking off villains on Omega, but now he’s out to save every human colony.

Where Garrus is depicted as his best is with Shepard. Maybe it’s just me, but I suspect that many fans get excited every time Garrus returns to the squad because they associate him with that friend always at Shepard’s side. He’s the bud Shepard can always count on. And over and over again, throughout the franchise, Garrus says some great quotes about his siding with Shepard. One of my favorites comes from the start of 2:

G: Frankly I’m more worried about you. Cerberus, Shepard. You remember those sick experiments they were doing?S: That’s why I’m glad you’re here, Garrus. If I’m walking into hell, I want someone I trust at my side.G: You realize this plan has me walking into hell too. Hmm… just like old times.

And then there’s Garrus’ character farewell in ME 3 before the final London charge. Most of these farewells bring up the central point of the character’s conflict in some way or another - for instance, Grunt thanking Shepard for taking him out of the tank, Samara mentioning the monastery where her final daughters have lived. It’s the final wrap-up to the story we’ve experienced through each squadmate. It’s to note that Garrus and Shepard’s conversation is not centered on justice, ruthless calculus, Garrus’ father, Sidonis, regulations, or any of Garrus’ other side-struggles. Garrus and Shepard focus the conversation on their friendship. On supporting each other. They talk about them being together - be it here on Earth, or up in the afterlife:

G: Shepard. So I guess this is…S: Just like old times?G: Heh. Huh. Mmm. Might be the last chance we get to say that.S: You think we’re going to lose?G: No, I think we’re about kick the Reapers back into whatever black hole they crawled out of. Then we’re going to retire somewhere warm and tropical and live off the royalties from the vids.S: I wouldn’t know what do with all my time. Neither would you.G: Sign autographs?S: We haven’t won yet.G: James told me there’s an old saying here on Earth - “May you be in heaven half an hour before the devil knows you’re dead.” Not sure turian if heaven is the same as yours, but if this thing goes sideways and we both end up there, meet me at the bar. I’m buying.S: We’re a team, Garrus. There’s no Shepard without Vakarian. So you better remember to duck.G: Sorry, turians don’t know how. But I’ll improvise. And Shepard, forgive the insubordination, but this old friend has an order for you: Go out there, and give them hell. You were born to do this.S: Good-bye Garrus. And if I’m up there in that bar, and you’re not, I’ll be looking down. I’ll always have your back.

Between these two conversations, Garrus and Shepard literally talk about going through heaven and hell together. They connect through old times and forge into new times together, onward and onward. And there is an undying support between the two. They make each other stronger.

The Shadow Broker is sort of right that Garrus’ leadership potential overshadowed by Shepard. Garrus gains respect from teams on his own, but he never rises to that legend Shepard does by himself. That said, the Shadow Broker is also wrong that Garrus development is hindered by being around Shepard. Garrus being with Shepard is the best that Garrus is. The point of Garrus narratively is to be with Shepard, and that’s where he makes the most memorable storytelling difference. Garrus’ narrative is about being Shepard’s loyal best friend (or lover, if you romance him) - the second-in-command whose support is critical to the Milky Way’s salvation.

Garrus’ story isn’t centralized about how to handle justice outside regulation. Garrus’ story isn’t one about deciding what to do with gray morals and ruthless calculus, as much as he speculates about that topic. Garrus’ story isn’t one of getting out of Shepard’s shadow. It’s a story about him syncing with Shepard’s shadow.

The idea that there’s nothing sweeter than his loyal friendship.

#mun3001s #long post #Garrus #ME #Mass Effect #ME2 #ME 2 #Mass Effect 2 #ME 3 #ME3 #Mass Effect 3 #Garrus Vakarian #my analysis #non-UT #female shepard #Commander Shepard #ask #ask me

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