#and if you can figure it out I’ll give you a virtual hug

[snaill-dragon]

So the animation I talked about in my last post is *ALMOST* done. All the frames are good, I just need to clean it up a little.

But until then have references for some of the characters appearing in it

There are also two other characters in it named Hailey and Carmen. But I’m not done with their references just yet. (Besides they’re only in a few frames).

(Also keep in mind their designs will be simplified for anything animated. Obviously. Especially Anna, LOL).

[sorryimananti-romantic]

Hey bestie sooooo lots of stuff happened and there was an opportunity I was really hoping I was gonna get, and I didn’t. On top of that it went to the same favorite people that get everything every time and I’ve just been feeling really upset and everything so if you’ve got any mingi comfort that would be great. I could just really use a lil virtual hug rn 😅. There’s a bunch of other stuff that led up to this but now im just feeling really hopeless and wanting to give up on my major even though it’s my dream. I think I kinda need to just sit and wallow for a bit and I’ll be fine but if you got any fluff I could use all of it 😅🩷

aw babes i'm sorry to hear that 😭🫂 you and me both honestly really need a virtual hug (nah a real hug actually) and well, i hope you get much better things than what you were aiming for! we never know where the flow of life is gonna take us so hoping for the best for you, always 🩷 and i hope you fight for your dream too! if you want to talk about it, i'm here for you 🩷

a mingi comfort fluff though, who am i to deny you? ;)

there are times in your life when all you want to do is lay down on a bed and sink through it into the void

or lay down on soft grass and hope the ground swallows you

you put a weight over yourself in the form of your blanket- the only physical thing weighing you down among a bunch of other invisible things

but that isn't enough

the warmth of it, the softness of it, it isn't enough

everything is silent. you can hear the static background noise- that's how quiet it is

could this go on forever while you gather your pieces together?

could time stand still for you?

no.

it never will

you're being swallowed by a bunch of thoughts

i'm alone in this world

no one will understand me

everything is over

there's no going back from here

and a bunch of other negative phrases that are murky in your head, but there in all their mighty presence

it feels like everything you've worked for is crumbling down in front of your eyes

everything is going wrong, wrong- where did it all start to go wrong?

you can't quite put a finger to it

all you know is that you are overwhelmingly sad.

the emotion 'sad' didn't make much sense to you- you always thought it was associated with some other emotion or feeling- such as when you lose someone dear and it's associated with grief

but now... you think you're starting to understand a little what's it like to be just sad. the plain old sad

it springs a little sarcastic laugh out of you and you have to purse your lips to keep another awful sound from bubbling out of you

but this time, your ears detect the familiar sound of footsteps in the house and you wonder just how deep in your thoughts you were to miss the sound of the door unlocking

you don't move. you don't make an effort to. you just hope that he goes to take a shower first or starts cooking. you hope he doesn't realise you're home already

you hope you get a little time to yourself so he doesn't have to see you in this state-

but a knock sounds on the door anyway and his voice calls your name, his eyes probably searching the darkness

you hope that he misses your curled figure in the blankets, but he's far too observant for that

he doesn't turn on the lights. you feel the edge of your bed dip as he sits there

"you're not hiding from me... are you?"

it's mingi. you could cry just hearing his voice

"no... just tired. i'll be out in a few minutes."

he doesn't miss the crack in your voice either

"do you want me to give you some space, or do you want me to stay?"

there's one thing you love about mingi. he always asks you what you need

and he always gives you what you ask for

if it's space you need, he will gladly give you it because he realises the importance of personal space and just sorting your own mess yourself

he won't question you until you talk yourself but he will keep reminding you that he's here

he's perfect in that way

but if it's him you need... he'll drop everything to be with you too

he'll either just hold you in silence or mutter affirmations

and for the first time in a while, you don't know what you need

so you tell him exactly that

mingi sighs deeply and gets up. you wonder if he's going to leave so you check through the little gap in the blanket, your heart beating anxiously

but he only draws the curtains apart just a fraction so he can see better

and then he's back, crawling in the bed next to you and asking if he can get in the blanket with you

you allow it. you scoot a bit to give him some space and he positions the blankets so he can hold you in his arms as he lies down next to you

you're slower this time as you make way to him and he notices that too. so he simply just holds you for a while

and you let the tears flow and wet his sweatshirt. you will apologise later, but for now, you can't stop it

his hand caresses your back repeatedly in soft, circular motions. his other hand is holding yours and squeezing it affectionately

you don't know how long you stay like this but at some point, the tears stop flowing and you move a little to wipe your face

"sorry for being a mess," you laugh and he lets out a short chuckle himself

"you know it's perfectly fine with me," he assures you, planting a kiss on the top of your head. "feeling better?"

"a bit, yeah," you tell him. you take a few deep breaths

"what's wrong, love?"

"everything," you sigh. "everything's going wrong at the same time and it's too much, mingi."

mingi brings you back in a hug, this time stronger and a reminder that you're not alone

and you realise that yes- you may have been a little selfish when thinking that you were truly alone in this world

you have him

your constant source of strength, a pillar to lean on

someone who always nudges you in the right direction when you're lost

someone whose words of wisdom heal you

and someone who makes you laugh, especially when he's being goofy like now

"shall we take that little trip now? drop everything and run away?"

"oh, how i wish i could, but i can't run away from this," you sigh.

and just like that, you start talking. slowly, but gradually, you tell him the sequence of events

and he gives you the validation you need- that everything you're feeling right now... it's okay to feel that

he makes you sit in front of him and he holds your hands as you work everything out

he gives objective answers- he knows your strengths and weaknesses, and he suggests the best course

he also plans every possible direction things could go from here on out- something he's really good at

"and like i always say... it can only get better from here, right?"

"sure feels like an all time low, so... yeah?" you say.

"every time i think i'm at an all time low, life throws another one at me"

you laugh at that- he's relatable like this

"well... it can't get worse than this, maybe, yeah?"

"and even if something bad happens," mingi addresses the anxiety in your heart. "even if things don't go as planned and you have to give up something important, you should remember that you're a strong person who can get through this."

you nod, letting his words sink in

"i'm here for you, yes," he says, "but i'm only a guide and emotional support, yeah? whatever you do, it's all you. and you're incredible and amazing. you will get through this. i'm proud of every decision you will make moving forwards. i believe in you, love."

it's all you need to hear and a few tears spill again, but you smile through them as you look at mingi, the dark strands falling over his forehead, his eyes warm

mingi, the person who makes you stand on your own two feet time and time again

mingi, who makes you realise that you can face anything in this world on your own

and mingi, who'll be there when you return from your battles. who'll patch you up, kiss your head and hug you

just like he hugs you now, all warmth and love

he brings you outside so you can eat dinner and it gets better

you don't feel like you're drowning anymore

you're not out of that surface, no, but it's a whole lot better for sure

he talks to you and you address other things in between jokes and kisses exchanged

and when it's time for bed, he holds you, preparing you for tomorrow

it will be okay

you will be okay.

[missrosiesworld]

Heartfelt Connections

Here are some sweet headcanons for NakedToaster when they are in a relationship:

Soft and Gentle: Despite their sarcastic exterior, Toasty is incredibly gentle and caring. They love to give soft, comforting hugs and often stroke their partner's hair while they cuddle.

Toasty, pulling their partner closer, softly stroking their hair: "You know, I could stay like this forever."

Partner, snuggling deeper into their embrace: "Your touch is so soothing. It's like all the stress melts away."

Toasty, smiling softly: "I'm glad. I just want you to feel safe and loved."

Creative Surprises: Toasty enjoys creating thoughtful surprises, like coding a special app or game just for their partner, filled with inside jokes and sweet messages.

Toasty, excitedly showing their phone: "I made something special for you."

Partner, intrigued, takes the phone and sees a custom app: "Is this... a game? With our inside jokes?"

Toasty, grinning: "Yep! It’s filled with little things that remind me of you. I hope you like it."

Supportive Listener: They are always there to listen, offering thoughtful advice and support. Toasty values deep conversations and is genuinely interested in their partner's thoughts and feelings.

Toasty, attentively listening, holding their hand: "Tell me about your day, I want to know everything."

Partner, sighing, sharing their thoughts: "It's been rough, but talking to you helps."

Toasty, squeezing their hand gently: "I'm always here for you. Let’s figure it out together."

Flustered but Affectionate: Toasty gets easily flustered by their partner's playful teasing and flirting, often turning red and stumbling over their words. However, they never fail to express their love, often through small gestures like leaving cute notes or preparing their favorite snacks.

Partner, teasingly: "You’re blushing again. It’s adorable."

Toasty, turning red, fumbling with a note: "I-I am not! I just... wanted to leave this for you."

Partner, finding the note with a sweet message: "This is so thoughtful. You always find a way to make me smile."

Toasty, smiling shyly: "I just want you to know how much you mean to me, even if I get flustered saying it."

Protective but Respectful: Despite being protective of their partner, they respect their independence and support their decisions. They love seeing them shine and encourage them to pursue their passions.

Toasty, serious but caring: "I want you to be happy, and I’ll support whatever you decide."

Partner, smiling gratefully: "Thank you. It means a lot knowing you have my back."

Toasty, nodding firmly: "Always. I believe in you and your choices."

Tech Savvy Romantic: Toasty uses their tech skills to enhance their relationship, like setting up virtual dates when they're apart or creating a digital scrapbook of their memories together.

Toasty, pulling up a shared screen: "I set up a virtual date night for us. Look, it’s our favorite movie and snacks."

Partner, surprised and delighted: "You really went all out. This is perfect, even if we’re miles apart."

Toasty, smiling: "Distance doesn’t matter when we can still share these moments."

Playful Banter: Their relationship is filled with playful banter and inside jokes. Toasty loves making their partner laugh and often uses their wit to keep the mood light and fun.

Partner, laughing: "Is that your way of challenging me?"

Toasty, smirking: "You know it. I’m just saying, I’d win in a trivia match."

Partner, playfully rolling their eyes: "We’ll see about that, mister trivia master."

Nervous Romantic: Despite being in a relationship, Toasty still gets nervous and giddy when planning romantic gestures. They always want everything to be perfect for their partner.

Toasty, fidgeting slightly, presenting a homemade meal: "I tried cooking your favorite dish. It might not be perfect, but..."

Partner, touched, tasting the food: "This is amazing! You put so much effort into it."

Toasty, relieved and smiling: "I just wanted to do something special for you."

tags: @camistheone

[look-at-the-soul]

The Grandma’s series

Tommy Shelby x reader (plus the most important guest; grandma) 👵🏻🤭

Hello again my darlings,

As I continue to figure out this thing they call life, you may have noticed I took a step back after losing my grandma. This event hit me like the strongest earthquake and the pain is only explained as if losing a part of myself in the process. Even tho she’ll be by my side in my heart from now on, it’s not the same.

I’m incredibly touched/thankful with the kindest souls in here that reached out to have a kind word with a completely stranger, your words and virtual hugs mean more than you can even imagine ❤️‍🩹

@lyarr24 @zablife @raincoffeeandfandoms @ironpen @elenavampire21 @runnning-outof-time @holacia3 @winchestergirl22 @shelbydelrey @cillmequick @ange-thoughts @cljordan-imperium @thesoldiersminute @emotionalcadaver @lau219 @kmc1989 in no particular order, you can’t even imagine the impact your kindness has. To feel having someone who doesn’t even know me personally send their best wishes it’s a balm to my broken heart.

I know I can’t change anything and I can’t bring her back (I’d give it all tho), but writing and reading for me has always be an outlet, a refugee, a safe place, lots of my stories were written at her house because every time I visited her, I got inspiration to write. She never knew (although now it’s more probable that she knows my little secret 🤭)… so I want to give her some kind of tribute.

And all of you (not just the people tagged) are more than welcome to join of course! 🤍🕊️ I know there probably loads of Christmas challenges so I don’t want you to feel pressured at all, take your time, all stories are welcomed any time (holiday inspired or not)…

If you feel up to create something, I’m adding a couple of Prompts/ ideas, but feel free to add your own!! The only request I’d ask is adding something related to grandmas 🤍 (it can be any character from the Peaky world or any Cillian character). And I’ll make an exception and open requests for this little celebration as well.

*Wearing grandma’s jewelry to an important event

*Cooking with grandma

*Listening to grandma’s love story

*Spending the holidays with grandma

*Staring at a photograph of grandma

*A stranger coming up to y/n to say she looks just like her grandma

*Dancing with grandma

*Visiting grandma’s grave during her anniversary

Once again, thank you for all the love you’ve shared with me 🤍🕊️❤️‍🩹 it means more than words can express!

[estrellami-1]

Okay my love I’m sending you a sad and pathetic prompt and then a cutesy fluff prompt (I thought about just sending you the cute one, I feel like all I’m doing these last few days is feeling awful and not being very productive or fun to be around and I think I was just wallowing when I wrote that comment so absolutely feel free disregard this one if you want) this is the sad one, I was thinking more hurt/comfort vibes:

This is just basically self insert except it’s not me I’m inserting it’s my situation lol, one of their relatives passes away (not Wayne) and on top of that they have to find homes for their loved ones pets that they loved the most of anything in the world when everyone is just telling them to euthanize or that everywhere is full and they’re four states and 16 hours away from the pets so it’s not like they can go pick them up easily if at all, which causes them to get sick/throw up a ton from the sadness and anxiety about the situation - enter the other who takes care of them to make sure they don’t worry themselves to death (if anyone wants to come take care of me and maybe just give me about 3000 hugs a day we could make this a live action roleplay situation lol🥺)

(Sorry this is just me complaining pretty much, the other prompt will be cuter)

Oh my love, you’re allowed to feel bad and wallow. I’m so sorry this happened/is happening!! I can’t give you any real hugs but I’ll give you ALL the virtual hugs I can ❤️

When the World Ends - Part 1

Steve’s voice is trembling when he finally makes the call to Eddie. “Hey,” he manages, letting out a pathetic, airy laugh at how badly his voice shakes on that one word. “Um. Can. Can you come over?”

Eddie’s amazing, so he says, “I’ll be there in ten,” and he is. As soon as Steve opens the door, he murmurs, “What’s wrong?”

Steve bites his lip, invites Eddie in. “Y’know how I never mention my parents?” Eddie hums. “But I always leave in the spring for a couple weeks?”

Eddie nods. “Your grandparents, right?”

Steve nods. Bites his lip again, looks up at the ceiling, trying not to cry. “Um.” He sniffs. “My grandpa passed today.”

“Oh, Stevie,” Eddie murmurs, reaching for him until Steve shakes his head sharply. “What can I do?”

Steve huffs. “What can anyone do?” He wipes his face and begins to pace. “My grandma’s too old to stay on her own now, let alone with all the animals they’ve got, and of course it’s not like her own son would help, not when he could be in Cabo instead, finding new ways to cheat on my mom with his secretary or assistant or her secretary or who the fuck knows. And I want to help but I can’t leave Hawkins, not when everyone else is still here, and there’s still a chance, but it feels so selfish not to go when she needs me-”

“Steve,” Eddie interrupts softly, hands up between them. “Take a breath, man, it’ll be okay. I know you love your grandparents but this isn’t all on you, okay?”

Steve slumps back into the couch like a puppet whose strings have been cut. Says, barely above a whisper, “I’ve got animals out there.”

Eddie hums softly. “What did you say?”

“Animals. Pets. I can’t have them here so my grandparents have ‘em. I’ve got a dog and chickens and a horse and what ‘m I gonna do with them?”

“We’ll figure it out,” Eddie promises him.

Steve groans and stands up again, beginning to pace again. “They’re four states away, Eddie! I don’t have a horse trailer, I dunno anyone in Hawkins who has chickens so I dunno if that’s even allowed, and I can’t bring my dog here!” He runs a hand through his hair, grimacing. “I guess the horse could go back to the neighbor, but they gave her to me for a reason, and I dunno what’s gonna happen to the chickens, and imma have to give the dog away, too, and get my grandma somewhere she can be taken care of, and fuck, there’s still the house-” he chokes on an inhale and a sob, standing still for a moment before he dashes through the house.

Eddie watches, wide-eyed, and follows when the sound of retching reaches his ears. “Oh, Stevie,” he murmurs, dropping to his knees beside him, hand hovering over his back. “Can I touch you? Rub your back?” Between gasping breaths, Steve nods, so Eddie puts a gentle hand on his back, rubbing up and down. “You’re gonna be okay,” he murmurs. “I know how scary this all seems right now, but you’re the strongest person I know, ‘sides Wayne, and you’ve got people who care about you and who’re gonna be here for you very step of the way, okay?”

The puppeteer cuts the strings once again, and Steve sags sideways into Eddie, trying to regulate his breathing, still quietly choking on his sobs. “Want me to call Birdie?” Eddie asks quietly, moving his hand to wrap his arm around Steve’s shoulders.

Steve shakes his head. Says, between breaths, “She’d panic.”

Eddie hums. “And you wanna be okay for her when she panics.” Steve nods. “Okay, I get that. I’m glad you called me.”

Steve sniffles. Eddie hands him some toilet paper. Says, after he’s blown his nose, “Feels like the world’s ending.”

Eddie thrown back into a memory from months ago. “If the world ends again, you know where I am,” he’d said. He hadn’t been sure, at the time, if Steve would call him. But they stayed friends, to the point where Steve calling him wasn’t quite the rarity it used to be, and Eddie doesn’t think he’s ever felt so honored.

“And you called me,” he murmurs, back in the present day, knees sore from the bathroom tile. He knows they’re going to pop like an old man’s when he stands. He decides not to worry about that right now.

Steve nods. “Knew you’d come.”

“And I did,” Eddie nods. Rubs his hand up and down Steve’s arm. “How’re you feeling?”

Steve sniffs again. “Like shit.”

Eddie lets out a soft chuckle. “I probably should’ve guessed. Ready to get up? Or wanna stay here for a minute?”

“Wanna stay here forever,” he says, but shifts to get up.

He stumbles a little when he stands, hissing. Eddie steadies him. “Legs’re asleep.”

“That’s okay, Stevie, I’ve gotcha. Come rinse your mouth out, m’kay? We’re going back to bed. I’m gonna make a few calls, okay?”

Steve won’t look at him in the mirror. “Gonna leave?”

“Not unless you want me to,” Eddie swears. Steve meets his eyes for a brief second. Shakes his head. “Then I’ll stay until you get sick of me.”

Steve manages a shaky smile. “Not possible.”

Eddie sighs contentedly. “Rinse your mouth out,” he gently reminds him. “Let’s get you up to bed.”

When Steve’s in bed, Eddie turns to leave, then turns back just as quickly when Steve grabs his hand. “You’re not leaving?”

Eddie squeezes his hand. “Not leaving. Just gonna make a quick call.”

“Okay,” Steve whispers, but his breathing picks up again, and Eddie changes his mind.

He bullies his way under the covers next to Steve, pulling him in until his face is tucked into Eddie’s neck and Eddie can rub his back. The call can wait until Steve’s asleep, so he can get back before Steve wakes up.

Steve’s world is ending. That’s every bit as important as the world itself ending. So Eddie resigns himself to stand guard over Steve’s dreams, keeping them happy as best he can.

I hope y’all liked this! The fic tag is the name (“#whentheworldends”) and my writing tag is “#starambles”. Remember I’m NOT doing a taglist for these, so subscribe to either to see where this goes next! Send me an ask with the next thing you want to happen in this fic!

[sc0tters]

New Year Memories ☆ Teammates in Action

summary: after a disappointing performance in the final group game, Gabe checks up on Jamie

authors note: this was a blurb because someone asked for some cute gabe and jamie content but then this got to over 1k and that aint a blurb no more.

Jamie had been hit in their final group stage game. It was sore as she was pushed against the board at full speed and after the refs swore there was nothing the other player could do as they were already at full speed by the time Jamie was close to the board making it virtually impossible to slow down.

It frustrated her how the coaches agreed it was best to have her sit for the rest of the game as it seemed that she was being targeted by the other team more than her teammates. Thankfully for her she didn’t have any injuries and was going to be ready for the QF game. But still that didn’t make her feel any better about what had happened.

Nobody was surprised when she got back to the hotel and just straight to her room. It was a normal thing to do when she wasn’t happy with her performance as she would shut everyone out. But this time Gabe wasn’t having it “I’ll be back.” He announced as he made his way over to the elevator “you want us to be here with an ice pack for when she kicks your ass out?” Jamie never listened to anyone when she got in this mood so all of the guys from BC knew to leave her alone.

Gabe flipped the boys off as he pressed the number for the floor the team was on. He practically sped to her and he couldn’t help but laugh as he could hear the soft sounds of the Lion King playing “J!” Gabe knocked on her door as he was itching to see her.

There was silence for a few moments until the door opened “if you’re here to yell at me you can fuck off.” Jamie warned as she opened the door letting him see her “wanted to check on you.” He shook his head as he made his way into her room “you know I know you’re lying.” Gabe mumbled grabbing her hands so that he could finally force her to look at him.

It took her a moment but she couldn’t help it as she sniffled “why was I punished for them being rough?” Jamie sniffled as the guys usually handled themselves really well when they got hit “coaches just care about you.” Gabe had to admit that he was also struggling to keep his cool as Jamie went down every few minutes as the hits only got harder “I handle it myself!” At this point tears were rolling down her cheeks as she felt like an idiot for caring.

Gabe didn’t know what made him do it but he wrapped his arms around her not giving her a second more to think as he hugged her. Jamie at first frozen because she hadn’t been like this before with Gabe like ever. But as his hand rubbed her back she did loosen her poster as she grew more comfortable with him “you shouldn’t have to handle it alone.” Now as she grew calmer Gabe knew he could talk to her.

Jamie looked up at him as she smiled “this is stupid.” She admitted as she shook her head “no it wasn’t.” He sat on her bed as he motioned her to join him “what can I do for you?” Gabe didn’t know if it was the fact that he knew Gavin wasn’t with her or what but he was glad that he was the one with her.

The girl chewed at the inside of her cheek “want to finish the movie with me?” Gabe was quiet as he smiled not being used to seeing her in a vulnerable state like this “just figured it could be nice to have some company.” Jamie rambled as her cheeks turned red making him laugh “c’mere.” Gabe shifted up her bed making her follow his lead.

Gabe patted his chest as he allowed her to lay there as her laptop sat on his lower torso “didn’t know you could be nice Perreault.” Jamie teased as she rested her head on his chest making him scoff.

He poked her rib cage making Jamie squeal as she squirmed against him “shush the movie is on.” His words made her laugh as she nodded going quiet as she listened to him.

Hours had passed and Gabe didn’t realise that he had fallen asleep when it was dark outside. His phone vibrated against his pocket making him groan. It was Lillian’s contact that illuminated his screen “where is my best friend?” Lillian was unimpressed as Jamie hadn’t responded to any of her texts “Cutter said you were with her so don’t try to lie to me.” She warned not giving Gabe the chance to lie.

It made him soft laugh as he saw Jamie nuzzle her head against his chest “she is just sleeping.” Gabe explained as he looked down to where Jamie was “well wake her up!” Ava was heard from behind her as the new year was minutes away and the girls were downstairs with their boyfriends ready for the fireworks show.

Gabe nodded as he sighed “I’ll bring her down in a second.” He nodded trying to slide out of her grip as he hung up “J?” His voice was soft as he brushed her hair out of her face “no.” Jamie complained as she was fast asleep and was comfortable against him “the girls want you downstairs for the fireworks.” Gabe forgot how much Jamie truly hated being woken up, which was why it was his favourite thing to do when she was sleeping on the bus.

Gabe groaned as he couldn’t stop “please?” He continued hitting her shoulder until she finally woke up “what?” Jamie pouted as she sent him a glare still not impressed “the girls want to celebrate the new year with you.” Gabe explained as he watched her yawn “wait I’ve got to get ready for it.” Jamie grumbled as she got up.

He knew he was in a losing battle when she ran into the bathroom trying to fix her hair. Out of the five minutes that she had available to her, Jamie used four of them “hurry up J!” Gabe complained as he opened the door to her balcony realising that the countdown had begun “I’m here.” Jamie’s eyes lit up as she saw the lights below them as she smiled seeing the group “we won’t make it down there in time.” The boy pointed out as he was planning on just watching the countdown but as they got to “one.” Jamie tilted his head towards her as she smiled “Happy New Year Gabe.” Her voice was soft as she kissed him.

For the first time in their lives that kiss was soft and delicate as though they were struggling to not get enough of each other "Happy New Year to you too Jaime." Gabe dragged his thumb over her chin as he smiled pecking her lips once more as neither one of them realised just how much time had gone by "you better not have killed her Gabe I want my friend back!" Ava's groan came from the door making the duo pull away.

Gabe frowned as he looked at Jamie "back to hating me?" He asked as they had the agreement that none of their friends were allowed to learn about this "maybe I'll be nice this year and go easy on ya."

[jackalopesao3]

Hi, I'm so sorry that you have to go through so much. I too wish covid ending soon because it's make everyone life miserable! But please do stay strong, stay healthy & stay healthy!!! Give you lots of virtual hugs! On the other end, can I please request a reaction/hc where the OM brothers found out that MC is a half demon half angel? Like they happen to see MC spread her wings which her wings are like black colour one side and white color another side? Do let me know if this is complicated to write! Thank you!

I know this has been sitting here for a while and I’m so sorry! I’m actually writing a very long Obey Me fic with some OCs that are half demon and half angel. 🤫 I hope you’re doing okay, dearie!

I am going to add some of my personal HCs about half angels / half demons.

I have been doing a lot of research on this subject and the best name I have found for a half demon / half angel would be a “Nephalem”. This is not to be confused with a half angel / half human called a “Nephilim”.

More info and the HC below the cut!

Nephalem (Half Angel/Half Demon MC)

General HC’s for the OM!world and MC:

In the OM! world it is forbidden for demons and humans to marry so it is safe to assume that demons and angels fall under those same restrictions. Perhaps MC’s parents wed in secret or maybe MC never met their parents? MC might not even know they’re a Nephalem, in fact, I suspect they would not.

I think that most half-breeds are taboo, albeit likely more powerful than the average angel or demon. The nephilim were ordered to be wiped out in certain religions. I would assume the same would go for nephalem. They’d have no place in the Celestial Realm and be killed immediately. As far as the human world goes, if they can remain hidden they might be okay but that doesn’t mean if an angel does happen to come across one while on earth, that they won’t kill them.

The only exception I could see would be the Devildom, the place that embraces freedom and chaos. Since Diavolo is working on peace between the realms, he’d likely allow half-breeds to stay and ban killing of any half-breed. That doesn’t mean that they may not be treated with discrimination.

The Reactions

“Mammon, look out!” You yell, as you throw yourself around your first.

The stray spell hurtles towards the two of you but suddenly two beautiful wings sprout out from your back, one is pure white and feathery while the other is pitch black also feathery. The spell bounces off of your wings and dissipates while you spin around, completely bewildered at the feeling and at your torn clothes, clutching your shirt to your chest.

Seven sets of eyes look upon you in the living room of the House of Lamentation. The seven brothers are just as shocked as you are.

Asmodeus is immediately at your side, gushing over how beautiful your wings are. He will be the one to help you groom your wings when you’re in your Nephalem form. He does his best not to make you feel weird and helps you to feel comfortable with the new you.

Lucifer is immediately concerned, a hand on your shoulder. He asks his brothers to give you some space as he tries to figure out what is going on. Once Barbatos and Diavolo confirm you’re a Nephalem, he makes sure you’re allowed to stay in the Devildom and that your identity is kept secret from the angels. Lucifer is your protector.

Mammon is also your protector. You do find yourself growing tired of him saying, “If any angel dare tries to hurt ya, I’ll kill ‘em!” The boy does mean the best but he gets a bit overprotective. He also uses this as an excuse to stay close to you and camp out in your room as much as you allow him too.

Beelzebub is also concerned for your safety but shows it in a different way. He starts taking you to the gym with him and also starts training you how to defend yourself. Beel will help you use your newly developing nephalem abilities in combat drills. With all the training, comes extra food. He’s making sure you’re eating more because of all the physical work you’re doing.

Belphegor is going to make sure that you’re not wearing yourself out with all this new training and makes sure that you’re getting enough rest. He sneaks you off to the attic for a nap during the day when he knows you need it most. He feels relieved that you’re learning to fight as he worries if other demons find out that they might try something. Of course, he will defend you too but he knows respect is earned best through your own self-defense.

Leviathan is gushing over how cool you looked deflecting that wayward spell Satan was testing out. He compares you to a favorite anime protagonist. You can guarantee that Levi is going to introduce you to any and all media with nephalem characters. He also makes you some clothing that’s versatile should your wings pop out unexpectedly.

Satan is so full of questions. He hasn’t meant many, if any, nephalem before. He will politely ask to study your form. He already adores your company so he is thrilled to have another excuse to get to know you even more. He gets a notebook, writing down details of your abilities and sketches your wings from various angles. He gives you a portrait of yourself with your wings out that he sketched himself as a present.

Diavolo is also quite curious and will invite you over for tea with him and Barbatos. They keep your newly discovered identity a secret from Solomon and the angels as they don’t want any of that information being told to the Celestial Realm for right now. The future king feels even more of a drive to unite the realms now so that all half-breeds can live without fear of persecution.

Barbatos shares with his experiences of the few times he encountered other nephalem and gives you any advice he picked up from those encounters. Barbatos will tutor you on any history in regards to the nephalem too. He’s glad to see there are more half-breeds alive out there than initially thought as it will help strengthen unity within the realms for Diavolo.

With the seven brothers, Diavolo, and Barbatos, you have a great support system as you discover this new side of yourself.

[ladylooch]

Letters in Your Last Name - Chapter 25

A/N: I will finish blurbs from last week at some point... but I'm in a very mehhh place and it's hard for me to be creative when I'm there. So... in the meantime, here is more Sam and Kev.

Word Count: 4.1k

“Babe.” Kevin whispers to me. I can feel the weight of him lightly pressing into my body from above. His elbows prop his weight mostly over me and his minty breath dances over my face. “Wake up.”

“Kev. I’m trying to sleep.” I groan, keeping my eyes closed. I reach my right hand up, feeling for his face so I can push him away from me. He dodges my hand and places insistent kisses vertically down my face, starting at my forehead and ending on my chin. I pop one eye open to look at him, drinking in his sexy face. Damn, maybe I will get up. He wiggles his thick eyebrows at me.

“I have planned out the perfect day. But for it to start, you need to get up.” I look over at the clock, scowling because it’s barely past 8:00 in the morning.

“This is grounds for divorce.” I snip, throwing my pillow at him. He shoves it to the side and grabs my hands, pulling me into a sitting position.

“Too late. We already submitted my green card application.” He jokes, a charming grin stretching his lips apart.

“Oh, well in that case.” I roll my eyes at him. “Does this day involve coffee?”

“Yep! We are starting our date with Iced Caramel Lattes from In the Loop. I hear they have chocolate croissants today too.” I bolt up, throwing the comforter to the side.

“Don’t need to tell me anything else.” I bounce to our bathroom, throwing the shower on.

Kevin’s laughter follows me into the shower. I scrub at my body, making it quick because the breakfast he has planned for us is that good. Afterwards, I dust my face with a little bit of make up, just enough to feel presentable. I head to our closet to change. Kevin has long since disappeared into the living room. I pull on a pair of light wash, denim shorts and a plain, mauve-ish pink shirt. I shove my feet into my gray and pastel pink Nikes. I figure this is versatile enough for anything he has planned. I finish the look with my diamond studs, then rush to the other side of the bed to replace my wedding rings on my finger.

I go to the full length mirror in our closet, double checking that I’m satisfied with how I look. I nod and grab my black, cross-body Kate Spade purse, tossing it carelessly over my shoulders. When I step out into the main area of our apartment, I immediately sense Matt Boldy’s presence. As I get closer, I can see him and Kevin playing FIFA on his Xbox. My steps slow, wondering how this impacts how quickly I’ll be getting my coffee.

“Fuck!” Kevin yells as Matt scores. The younger Wild star makes his virtual player run around the field like an airplane to celebrate.

“Gotta be faster than that, Kev.” Matt snickers, glancing over his shoulder at me. “Sam!” He shouts in excitement, getting up and wrapping me into a tight squeeze.

“Matty! Thought you were in Boston?” I question him, giving his back a quick rub during our hug.

“I was. I came back to sign my lease here and move my stuff out of Greener’s place.”

Matt had been living with Jordan Greenway for the last half of the season, but Jordan has a serious girlfriend now and has started kicking out all of his roommates. Plus, Matt is in a secure enough position with the team that he can afford to find his own place. When he asked Kevin what we thought of our building, Kevin encouraged him to come see for himself. He stayed with us for a few days at the end of the season then flew home to Boston. By the time he left, the on-ice chemistry created a tight off-ice bond between the three of us. Matt couldn’t attend our wedding in Switzerland, but we have been FaceTiming with him at least once a week this summer.

“Oh great! What floor are you on?”

“Twelve.” He grins at me.

“Fitting.” I nod my head. “Do you need help moving?”

“Nah, I hired some guys. They are just finishing up so I better get back to them. Thanks for the confidence boost, Kev.” Matt walks over to bump fists with him as Kevin shakes his head.

“That fucking kid.” He mutters to me once Matt has exited the apartment, but not before one last squeeze for me. “Ready?”

“You betchya!” I say in my most intense Minnesotan accent. He laughs at me, placing his hand on the small of my back.

“You look sexy. I love your ass in these shorts.”

“Um, bedroom?” I turn immediately, shoving at his chest to push him back towards our room.

“Okay, but quick.” He grabs at my hips. He pulls me flush with him and I feel his erection growing against my stomach. “I’ve got a lot of fun planned for us today.”

“Great. I think you fucking me speechless sounds like a pretty fun start.” _ _ _

The theme for the day is all our favorite things in Minnesota.

Earlier this month, Kevin and I returned to Minnesota after a brief honeymoon in Italy. Kevin’s contract negotiations with the Wild are still ongoing and seemingly picking up speed, but nothing has been solidified. After our honeymoon of bliss, our first order of business was securing Kevin permanent residency status in the Unites States. Kevin’s visa has always depended on being under an existing NHL contract, but now that he is married to an American, we can be done with the yearly applications. In order to get the paperwork and interviews completed, we decided to spend a majority of the summer in Minnesota rather than Europe. We are hoping to be returning to Sweden before the season begins, but only if we can get everything finished in a reasonable timeframe.

We start in the North Loop neighborhood of Minneapolis with a breakfast full of decadent coffee and chocolate croissants. Once we are full, we move on to a stroll around Lake Harriet. We walk casually hand in hand, enjoying the warm summer sun. Several people stop Kevin along the way, asking for autographs and pictures. Each time he gives me an apologetic look, but I love watching him interact with fans. The genuine joy they have seeing him for a moment fills my heart.

From there, we find ourselves at Wakame in the Uptown neighborhood, devouring sushi rolls until we almost have to be rolled out of there. Pun completely intended. After that, we drive back to our apartment to drop off Kevin’s car. We spend a good chunk of the afternoon wandering the area by the Stone Arch bridge, taking in the scenes of Minneapolis on a crystal, clear day.

After that, we get tired, heading back to our apartment to take a break, lazily running our hands over each other until we drifted to sleep. When we awaken, we change and freshen up for a fancy night in our city. We head to the Prohibition Bar to take in higher views of Minneapolis. We each enjoy two drinks then find ourselves at Manny’s Steakhouse for a decadent dinner.

“I think I gained five pounds today.” I say to Kevin as I push the rest of the chocolate cake completely to his side of the table. His eyes sparkle excitedly.

“More for me to hold onto when we fuck.” He shrugs, sliding the fork through his lips. “This cake is so good. It might beat Princess Cake.” I gasp.

“No!"

“Yes.” He is dead serious as he looks me in the eye.

“I won’t tell.” I swipe a finger across my lips then lean back into the cushion of the booth. I exhale heavily, feeling happy and full after our day of fun. “Thank you for a fun day.” I say as he devours the last bite of cake.

“We aren’t done yet.”

“What?” I raise my eyebrows surprised. “Babe, I cannot eat or drink one more thing.” I place my hand on my stomach for emphasis. “It’s a good thing I changed into a dress. The button on my shorts would have popped off already.”

“It doesn’t involve anything else to eat.” He assures me. “But it is a bit of a drive, so we should get going.” He tosses his credit card onto the table.

Ten minutes later, we are in the car heading east towards St. Paul from Minneapolis. Kevin reaches for my hand as we pass the Xcel Energy Center on our right, continuing on to the Eastern suburbs. Our car ride is mostly silent, but comfortable. I resist the urge to ask what is next, knowing he’s planned this much fun, whatever he has left will likely be too.

A few more twists and turns off the highway lead us to an empty lot in the city of Woodbury. My eyes scan the area, taking in the relatively private space. Large trees hide the lot from the road and the driveway is dirt. The closest houses are well in the distance and the land looks leveled, ready for whatever is planned to sit atop of it. Kevin unbuckles his seatbelt and turns to me, taking in my reaction. I think I know why we are here, but I turn, waiting for him to speak.

“This past month of marriage has been the best month of my life. I love you. And I’ve loved living in the city with you the last few years. But… I think it’s time for us to put some roots down.” I nod my head in agreement. “So, I reached out to a relator a few of the guys have used and he sent me this listing. I haven’t seen it yet, but he was willing to keep it off the market for me until we could come by.”

“Okay.” I nod, unbuckling my seatbelt and opening the door.

“He has a contractor who has helped build a few other athlete’s houses out here over the years. They have tons of different layouts and styles we can pick from along with a staff of designers to help with the smaller details. Basically, we can build anything that we want here.”

We walk around the car, meeting in the middle to lace our fingers together. Slowly, we walk along the land. Because it’s mid-summer, the sun is still up and it highlights the features of the lot well. It’s sizable, but unlike most new builds, it has older trees lining the area, providing much needed privacy.

“There were some other spaces west of the cities, but this is close to TRIA and the X along with your family.” I nod, continuing to take it in.

“I like this area.” I confirm, stopping to stand in the middle. “If we built facing this way, we would get a great view of the sunset and sunrise. The home would be bright and sunny.”

“It would make up for leaving our balcony.” He muses as me. “But, you could have your own coffee bar and the built ins you’re always looking at on Pinterest.”

A huge grin breaks out on my face and I shiver excitedly. A home of our own, that we get to build exactly how we want. It’s an opportunity I’m grateful to have presented to me right now.

“Picture this: a big kitchen, with one of those obnoxiously large islands, and five bedrooms so our three babies can have their own rooms. I don’t know how many, but a reasonable amount of bathrooms.” His arms are spread wide, gesturing to the whole lot.

“Yeah?” I laugh, looking around at the empty lot. “Oh! We need a big, bonfire pit and a deck. And! We could line the yard with those outdoor string lights too.”

“Deal. Anything you can dream up, we’ll make it happen.”

“Yay!” I bounce excitedly, spinning around in the dirt. A realization washes over me and the smile slowly falls off my face. If we build the house of our dreams here, how much harder does that make it to leave Minnesota? Plus, we might not even be here anymore when it’s done being built. “Except, maybe we should wait.” I say, turning back to him. His hands are stuffed into the pockets of his shorts and the grin on his lips is obviously hiding something from me.

“Why?” He wonders, tilting his head to the side. His eyes are beginning to sparkle and I lower my eyebrows in confusion.

“You know something.” I narrow my green eyes at him accusingly.

“Why shouldn’t we do this?” He reiterates, swaying from foot to foot like he can barely contain what he wants to tell me. The excitement is building in me and I start laughing, which causes Kevin to start laughing. Then I’m bouncing up and down.

“Tell me!!!” I yell at him, bending over with my hands on my knees.

“We’re staying in Minnesota!” He rushes towards me, gathering me into his arms by my waist and twirling us around. I tilt my head back to the sky and scream in happiness. I can feel myself losing my balance, so I throw my arms around his head to secure myself to him.

“Are you serious!? When did you sign!?”

“I am signing tomorrow, but it’s a done deal.”

“Oh my god!!” I squeeze myself to his chest in a tight hug that steals my breath. I vibrate against him, tears building in my eyes. “How long? How much?”

“7 years, 7.8 million per year.”

“Baby! I’m so proud of you.” I cover his lips with mine in a desperate, sloppy kiss. “Look at you! All your dreams are coming true.” I pull back to look into his eyes becoming very aware of his hands on my ass.

“It’s been an above average summer.” He confirms to me with a light chuckle. “Getting you forever is still the best part though.” I shimmy in his arms then look back out across the lot.

“Oh… Matty.” I pout at Kevin. “You going to break the news to him that we are moving?”

“Not yet. We have some time. If he’s devastated, he can just move in with us.”

“Okay.” I nod my head with a laugh. Kevin loosens his grip on me, letting me slide down his body. His hands stay firmly gripping my ass. I turn back to his face. He presses our lips together, tongue sliding against my bottom lip. I open my mouth for him, sighing into the depths of our kiss.

“Let’s do this.” I whisper to him. He nods in agreement.

“That gives us time to build it, move in, get settled, then I’m putting a baby in you. Fast.”

We both agreed we wanted some time together being married before we added to our family. We also agreed we didn’t want to wait too long. A year felt right when we talked. Starting to build the house soon would keep us on that path.

“We should probably practice before you do that.” I murmur to him.

“Mmm. I think we are done here then.”

“Yeah. Let’s go.”

After one last, confirming look around the lot, we head back to Kevin’s Audi. As per usual, the black SUV races down the highway to our apartment. The car is barely off before our hands are on each other. We are like teenagers rushing into the elevator and up to the 15th floor. The door to our apartment bursts open from our force and we crash into our unit.

“I can’t get you naked fast enough.” I insist to him, hooking one of my legs around his waist. He lifts me into his arms, laughing as his breath dances against my mouth. I close the minuscule gap between our lips. My spine tingles at the connection and I feel the instant heat pulse within me. Our tongues connect and my hands thread through his hair, holding him close to me. His hands grip my thighs tighter and he lets out a low growl from deep in his chest.

Kevin turns and lays me gently onto the couch without our lips disconnecting. We kiss at each other fiercely and our hands move in the same frenzy as we pull each others clothes off.

“I have champagne in the fridge.” He tells me between kisses as our shirts come over our heads.

“Later.” I insist, reaching for him again. “This is the only way I want to celebrate right now.”

I slide my fingers into the waistband of his shorts and wrap my hand around his hard penis. My thumb brushes against the plump head and he melts further into me in response. I ease his shoulders back until he is laying against the couch so that I’m in control. I kiss my way down his chest and abs. I reach the trail of hair circling his belly button before leading me south and I let my tongue take over. Kevin releases a sexy sigh as I adjust him in my hand and place my lips against the head of his dick. My tongue leisurely circles him and his hand comes to the back of my head, encouraging me down further. He lets out a moan that makes my heart pound harder in my chest.

I work him over with my mouth and hand until I know he can’t stand it anymore. His hands are on my head and his hips are jerking himself deeper into my mouth. As much as I want him to come, I want it on my terms tonight. I wiggle out of my panties and then I straddle him, holding his strong shoulders for leverage as I slide down his shaft. There is a brief stitch of discomfort. I wait it out by kissing along his neck. I pull back and Kevin watches me with hungry eyes as I slide up then immediately back down. When he moves his hips to help, I shake my head at him.

“No. You’ll get your turn. This one is mine.” I insist. He lays his head back into the cushions, dropping his arms from me and letting me fuck him like the superstar that he is.

Being in control and watching his face soften in ecstasy pushes me further and further to the brink. I reach for my heavy breasts and hold them in my hands before stroking my nipples. They tighten and Kevin lets out a strangled moan that might actually be a cry. I close my eyes and drop my head back towards my shoulders in delight. “Baby, you look so good fucking me like that.” He encourages me and I know he’s close because he’s starting to help again. His hands come back to my hips and he works me into him in a faster rhythm that has us both crying out in pure, primal need.

“Oh my god.” Kevin whispers as I slide down him one last time, keeping him in me as we both begin to descend back to reality.

“That didn’t suck.” I whisper to him as I pull fresh breath into my lungs.

Kevin wraps his arms tightly around me and rocks me against him one last time before pulling out completely.

“I know you said next one is my turn, but I’m gonna need that again in about 20 minutes.” I laugh at him and run my fingers through the sides of his wild, brown locks. He definitely has just fucked hair.

“Go get me that champagne and we have a deal.” I respond, tilting my head before placing our swollen lips together again.

“Gladly.” He taps my butt, encouraging me to move off of him. I fall to the other cushion and watch with heavy eyes as he walks naked, with a half salute, around the couch. I bite my lip and his eyes meet mine in a knowing look. He stops behind me and tilts my head back so he can Spiderman kiss me. “Love you.” He tells me so earnestly that I literally swoon in my seat. He kisses me one more time and then continues into the kitchen. He returns a minute later with two glasses along with the champagne bottle. He pours them out lazily before handing mine to me.

“To staying.” He toasts to me and I grin.

“To staying.” I respond.

Our glasses clink, we take a few sips, and in another couple of minutes, we are off to the races again.

- - -

I sit patiently next to Kevin watching him scan the last couple pages before he presses the black pen on the line. The back of my knees stick to the leather chair after coming in slightly damp from the humid, July air. I’m wearing a teal and purple, flowery sundress with my hair in a high pony to keep it off my neck. I twirl my wedding rings around my fingers, trying to settle my excitement for a few more moments. Bill Guerin and Kevin’s agent, Craig, are in the room with us. Kevin flips the page, signing the next few spots before pushing the paper over to Craig to review. Relief floods my body at it all being officially official.

“Looks great. Congratulations, Kevin.” Craig extends his hand to him and they share a firm shake. Bill and Kevin shake hands as well.

“We are thrilled to be keeping you in Minnesota.” Bill confirms to him. “Big summer for you two. A wedding and a new contract.” Bill extends his arms out to me.

“And we are building a house!” I cheer, accepting Bill’s hug. “We are happy to be staying here.”

“Us too. Have a great rest of your summer. We will see you in a few months.” Bill waves goodbye as he exits the room, accepting a phone call on his way out.

“I’m off to the airport. Busy month. Congratulations again to you both.” Craig waves and heads out of the room.

When we are alone, Kevin and I dash into each others arms. He squeezes me tight to him and I close my eyes, savoring every detail of this moment.

“I’m so proud of you.” I tell him, breaking our silence. “You earned every piece of this. I can’t wait to watch you keep growing here, where you want to be, with Matty and with an organization that values what you bring to the table.”

“Thank you.” He kisses my temple. “All of my dreams came true because of you. You changed my life, Sam.” I furrow my brows.

“You did the work.”

“Yeah but I didn’t give a shit about the work until I met you. You made me want to be better. I wanted to work on the parts of me that were holding me back from being great. You deserved someone like that.”

“That’s always been you, babe.” I assure him. “You give me too much credit.” He shakes his head no.

“Kev, media in about ten.” Aaron Sickman, PR Director, pops his head in. “Hey Sam.” He waves before he is gone again.

“Okay, I’m going to do this press conference, then I’m yours for the rest of the day.”

“Good deal. Can I come watch?” I ask him. He chuckles.

“Yeah. You want to sit up there with me?”

“No way.” I shake my head quickly. “Just want to hover in the background and watch as you lick your lips after each question, imagining your tongue on me instead.”

“Hey, now.” He warns, eyes dancing along the top of my breasts. “Don’t get me going before I have to do a press conference.”

Mine and Kevin’s phones begin to vibrate incessantly with text messages almost simultaneously. We share a knowing look; the news must be out.

“Another new chapter is beginning,” I say to him as we exit the room, heading down to the press room.

“And just like the rest of them, I think this will be the best one yet.”

With seven more years of security, I agree wholeheartedly with my husband.

[clockworkbibliophile]

As a fellow overwhelmed soul, I get it. Albeit from a different perspective of course , because each of us has their own stuff, just know you’re not alone. I’m a strong believer that It’s going to be ok and things will work out. There are going to be rough times but they will pass and better times will come.

The way I deal with all this is trying to get through day by day. I try to focus on the little things that bring me joy: like drinking my morning coffee in a mug I love, enjoying a shower after a long day and finding a small low effort activity that can give me even a small tiny daily win. For me that activity is playing on Duolingo or a short workout. The first takes 5 mins out of my day and gives me an easy win, the second takes about 15-25 mins of my day and resets my brain and gets some of that cortisol sweated out and gives me the satisfaction of having managed to do at least that. Other than that, given personal experience and from close friend’s’ experiences If I was experiencing focus issues that serious, I’d perhaps talk to a professional about the whole thing as well as about burnout and ADHD, especially if therapy for other mental health issues doesn’t seem to be helping the situation.

Either way, you’re doing your best and it’s ok to feel lost, it’s part of life. You will find your way, or the way will find you. Each of us has their own timeline and process of development and it doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s nor is there a blueprint to follow. You’re going to figure it out. You got this !

I sincerely hope things turn out for the best for you soon, and I send a strong supportive and comforting virtual hug your way! Take care!

thank you so much for this. you are so kind. <3 it’s just… I know i’m not doing my best, yknow? i’ve been so burned out and depressed for years now, since the end of high school, i’ve been barely scraping by in college and at my first corporate job… even a year after being let go and unemployed, I spent most of it barely able to get out of bed. i’ve just finally gotten a job acceptance, which i’m beyond grateful for, but so far it is the exact same work I did a year ago that I barely scraped by in, I was so burned out…. I don’t know why i still haven’t been able to muster the energy to be able to focus or dedicate myself to anything…. i’m doing it to survive but I don’t even have confidence i’ll be able to keep this job. even getting out of bed is an enormous feat for me. i’m petrified my own will to survive is not enough to keep me dedicated to this job. i’m afraid of being unemployed but i’m terrified of not being able to do ok at a job to keep it, and happiness or any sort of direction is so far away it feels impossible. I don’t even know what I would consider for a career change or life change bc everything feels so gray and bleak, I don’t see any direction where things would be ok.

[captainaikus]

Also I loved reading The Alchemist but I seriously need to get my own copy for a reread. Have you heard of No Longer Human by Dazai Osamu? It’s Japanese classic literature and I was very emotional by the end of it because at that point in my life I could really relate with so many things the author wrote abt. I need to reread it eventually with a new set of eyes and now that I’m in a much better place in life. I actually first got into it because of Bungo Steay Dogs LEAVE ME ALONE I FOUND SOME VERY GOOD BOOKS THROUGH THAT ANIME ASHKHFFGCC. I’m currently in the long process of making my way through H.P. Lovecrafts stories and I need to start Crime and Punishment at some point but we’re not ready for that level of commitment and annotating yet 💀. Do you annotate books? I only recently got into it and sometimes I hate it but other times I love it. Like I hate it when it starts to feel like another homework assignment but I love it when it helps me collect my thoughts and I can take my time to actually digest what I’m reading. So it’s a 50/50 experience. From my birthday book spree, I got the omnibus (joint) volumes 10-11-12 of One Piece (I’m collecting all the omnibus volume sets where it’s like 3 volumes in one manga cause collecting the box sets is really expensive and I’m a very impatient person sometimes lol), the omnibus volume 1-2 and 3-4 of Tokyo Revengers (when I found out that they had finally released physical English versions of the manga I walked into Barnes and Noble with the mission to get that volume first and foremost and I was so excited and surprised and happy that they had also released the second omnibus volume too so I got both at the same time rereading Tokyo Revengers from the beginning is so nostalgic and makes me cry so much but in a good way because at this point in the story everything’s still almost great and happy), I also got volume 2 of Blue Lock and ordered volumes 1 and 3 (I figured I might as well start collecting the manga now so I can start binge reading immediately after the first season ends). I also got actual book books too. One was a new buy (not from my tbr list) and it’s called Belladonna by Adalyn Grace (one of the store people recommended it to me last time I was there and it sounded fun and interesting so I got it, it’s also hardcover since it’s new, and oh man I haven’t purchased a hardcover in such a long time lol), Kingdom of the Wicked by Kerri Maniscalco (it’s was all over my fyp for a while but that’s not the reason I got it, I got it because a lot of my favorite booktokkers recommended it and it’s not mainstream, made that mistake with The Poppy War already, so I got it), and the paperback copy of The Hawthorne Legacy by Jennifer Lynn Barnes (idk why this book got so much hate but I liked the first one so we shall see). Oh and I’m also rereading PJO in honor of the show coming out soon. Do you like Percy Jackson? The trailer for the show was asvjgdffff amazing it was like seeing my childhood come to life I have high hopes for the show. And I’m also reading Chainsaw Man rn because I had gotten volumes 1-5 already before the anime started cause I heard it was great and I wanted to be ahead if the show you know but I finished volume 3 before life happened so I wanna start reading it again. Anyways how are you? Doing good I hope? Have you eaten and drank water today? *sends virtual hugs*

- ✨ anon

The moment I read 'no longer human by Dazai Osamu' I knew it had to be BSD 💀 and reading further I turned out to be right; I’ll have to give it a try though. With Japanese books, I have the memoirs of a geisha and another autobiography of a geisha and ikigai. Murakami’s works have been complimented a lot so I’m contemplating if I should read that or not… maybe once I’m done with this book.

I tried reading Brida and Valkyrie by Paulo coelho but I was too young and didn’t understand it 😮‍💨

I do annotate books! It’s kinda a necessity atp being a uni student; but otherwise I annotate books as well cause life lessons to use later amirite?

I have a bleach Omnibus, a black edition of death note but otherwise I read manga online cause it’s easier in a way but for book books, I prefer the physical copy when I use travel or something along with music playing. Music makes the experience of reading good and even when I’m working or writing something. Most of the recs I get are from friends and family or something I pick up when I’m out shopping for books. I’ve heard of Lovecraft’s books but I’ve never had the chance of reading them… I read mostly non fiction works but I do enjoy a good horror.

Funny thing, I started getting into Percy Jackson in eighth grade cause my peers were reading it but in five pages of lightening thief I just stopped reading for some reason? But. I managed to finish twilight in two days and proceeded to buy the entire collection. Then I sold it off cause I realized I was being cringe and it was a phase (I’m so embarrassed of even telling this story 😭) and then I read Harry Potter as well… managed to finish the goblet of fire and I had other books in the series as well like the order of the phoenix but I decided to give those away and finally found my place in mangas and anime and works of non fiction… the only fiction I read recently was Verity by colleen Hoover ; and that inspired me to write ruined Rome (which is currently on hold and will continue once I edit the new changes into it)

As for chainsawman , that manga provided me comfort in a way cause i had to travel at that time since a member of my family had passed away. And while I was at the funeral, I wasn’t in a good shape cause we were pretty close so I decided to read chainsawman and the story of Pochita and Denji gave me an odd sense of comfort I would say? Cause it’s like ‘I’ll always be a part of you.’

Switching onto the lighter side of things, people are going crazy over Makima and I’m just waiting for mappa to animate that part 😶‍🌫️

I’m doing good bb <3 worked out this morning, got through two bottles of water, had brekky and my roommate is planning to cut my hair this week and I’m also working on an art of me and Aiku (yes I am that obsessed, but hey selfship is the best ship) uni goes on; and I’m doing work in advance so that I can relax later (I’m so sleepy but caffeine isn’t good for my system as much so I stick to just milk), writing a lot more and studying as well. How about you? I hope you’re doing well and taking care of yourself?

*sending hugs*

[mightbelola]

In a Perfect World This Would All Be Good

Everything now is easy for me. Get up early, be there for coffee. Prepare breakfast, and two other meals, then the dishes. Remember to shower and drink water. Get some steps in if the weather’s good. Always clean the house but don’t touch the wires. The computers must always be working, the firewall can never drop, the servers must always be running and I know this because I’ve done this many times before, it’s getting boring.

Except last night, I kind of enjoyed it.

Joe and I were in the living room. We’ve been staring at these lifeless computers with wires tangled up around, screws scattered on the floor, and the guide book opened to page 64. I know I said the house must be clean at all times, but nobody moves when the wires are around. He’s doing his tech thing. I was standing near him this time to watch him closely. It’s almost like I’m back at work when I was a teacher, looking down at a student trying to write one simple sentence. Back in Medalla, he had a special room for all the tech toys, and I got mine for books and fantasies and cats. But we moved to a smaller house now, so okay, “Where are the lights? Thought you said it would work this time.”

It’s been five times, it’s been four days. For some reason, he couldn’t get the home lab thing working. It is important for our home lab to be up and running so he can back up his job, we need the security. I also need the internet at home.

“I don’t know. I’ve tried everything.” Then he went again talking about all the steps he’s taken, making sure he didn’t miss anything. He’s such a trooper, it’s so cute to look at.

“This one goes here, I’ll move this network card over here, another card is coming over, this cable will connect this….to this.”

“Still no lights.” He sounded like he’s about to give up.

“Maybe it’s the power button, the power supply?” I sometimes throw words I think he’s said before, hoping that it would make any sense, because I don’t know how else I can help. But to my surprise he said, “you could be right, I can test the power supply.”

The power supply was the first of many other parts that we tested. He still couldn’t figure it out. I checked the time and it’s been three hours. I realized that I’ve never done this before. I’ve never listened to him talk about tech this long. I also realized I’ve never understood it this much before. Back in Medalla, he would tell me things about Linux, and I didn’t focus. Instead, I went to this secret garden in my mind where he’s cute with his cap backward, and we’re back in Iceland, or somewhere nice when we were happy.

He’s on the floor now, devastated. “I’m sorry, I failed.”

“No, you didn’t. You just need a little break.” I joined him on the floor, making sure I wasn’t touching the screws or the wires, or anything.

“In a perfect world, this would all be good.” He continued, “In a perfect world, we would only need three things for this to work. We don’t need all these big PCs, we don’t have to walk around all these wires. Everything would be so easy. Three things, that’s it. But they’re so expensive.”

“The cheap PCs worked before, you’ll figure it out.” That’s what I usually say, because again, I don’t know how else I can help.

He was quiet for a while. A moment later, he raised his arms up, drawing mind maps in the air, mumbling solutions, still trying. We locked eyes, he’s still mumbling things, and I nodded along pretending like I understood what he was saying.

“I got it,” so excited like a child, he got up and got back to his toys.

I sat there and just looked at him the whole time. I sometimes threw tech words here and there, and hoped for the best.

I don’t know if that was any help because not long after that he jumped, hugged me, and screamed, “It’s back on, baby!”

Surprised me that I didn't have to go to my secret garden. Surprised me that I even know what a Proxmox is. It’s a virtual machine, which you can create by talking to computers. I also know what a hypervisor is. It’s the host for all the virtual machines he’s been creating over the course of six years for our home lab to be running. I understand a lot now, just from listening to him obsessively explain the whole thing that whole night.

And I actually enjoyed it.

I mean, in a perfect world, we would have twin babies right around us instead of computers and wires.

But he said, “Thanks for listening to me,” and I smiled because this isn’t so bad. It isn’t so bad at all.

[nostalgiaispeace]

2334.

1. What is something in your life that you feel hopeful about right now? i’m hopeful that i’ll get the career i’ve always wanted.

2. What was the last thing you worried about that turned out better than expected? literally everything i worry about turns out better than expected

3. Name somewhere you are planning on visiting in the near future? no idea.

4. How often do you go grocery shopping and how much food do you usually get in one go? every 2 weeks and enough to last me 2 weeks.

5. What is a meal you eat extremely often? Or do your meals & food choices vary a lot? usually Mexican food or pasta dishes

6. When was the last time you felt unable or unwilling to speak your mind to someone? never

7. What was the last thing you changed your mind about? i don’t remember.

8. Who was the last friend you saw, and what did you do together? jennifer and emily. we went to the park and lunch with riley.

9. Who tends to show up in your dreams? Do you ever wonder if you appear in anyone else’s dreams? people i work with; no

10. What is something you wish you could say to someone who is no longer in your life, or something you wish they could know? “you were so so wrong.”

11. Instead of flat earth, what do you think of the simulated earth theory, that we’re basically all just a giant computer program or virtual reality? lame

12. What worries you most about your future? uncertainty.

13. What is something you do to feel better when you’re scared? getting a hug.

14. Who do you feel you can count on the most in life? Is there anyone you wish you could count on more? my mom; yes

15. What makes you trust someone? When was the last time someone broke your trust? If I feel comfortable with them; in 2020

16. When was the last time you shared a secret with someone, and how did they react? I don’t remember

17. Are you more likely to give advice or to ask for it? give.

18. When was the last time you felt totally lost, figuratively speaking? How about literally? i’m not sure

19. In what ways are you emotionally strong? In what ways are you emotionally weak? In every way i am

20. What is the strangest book you have ever read? How did you find out about it? i don’t know. probably something written by stephen king.

21. Do you prefer to watch movies or tv alone or with other people? Is there anything you refuse to watch alone? doesn’t matter.

22. What was the last thing you broke? How about fixed? i don’t remember

23. Is there a sign or symbol that means a lot to you for whatever reason (eg. seeing certain animals or birds, 11:11 or other repeating numbers, syncs, butterflies, hearts in nature, etc)? nothing really.

24. Do you have any personal ghost stories or paranormal experiences? yes

25. What do you get complimented on the most? I’m not sure

26. What is something unusual that you find attractive? i’m not sure

27. What time do you tend to eat your first meal of the day? And your last? 1pm and 630pm

28. What was the subject of the last video you watched? i’m not sure

29. When was the last time you traveled out of town, and where to? Indiana and it was for easter

30. How would you describe your overall aesthetic? i don’t really have one

[musings-of-a-rose]

Meet the Millers - Chapter 8

Pairing: Joel Miller x Benny Miller x Will Miller x f!reader

Word Count: 4100+

Rating: Mature - 18+ ONLY!

Warnings: Bear in mind the pairing of this fic along with the fact it’s set in a post-apocalyptic setting, so there will be themes and elements fitting the setting. Just like ao3, “creator chooses not to use warnings.” If you click Keep Reading, that means you agree that you’re the age to handle mature themes. Also by clicking Keep Reading, you understand warnings may not be complete in order to avoid spoilers for the story.

Notes: I hit 200 followers and wanted to give y’all a little something so I did a poll and let you pick what one shot I write next. This is what y’all picked! I hope I can deliver. I started this out as a one shot and it MAJORLY got away from me, so now it’s a mini series. Thank you so much for following me and reading my ramblings! Also a shoutout to @astoryisaloveaffair for helping me figure out how things work and being an amazing sounding board, @icanbeyourjedi for helping me to settle on a filter for this moodboard, and @theewokingdead for being delightfully appalled at how many words this one shot has turned into and cheering me on with memes and gifs.

This is set loosely in The Last of Us universe. I’ve only played a bit of the game and watched others play (and the show isn’t out yet), so please forgive any inaccuracies. Also it’s a post-apocalyptic world so I’m taking a bunch of liberties here. Because fan fiction.

Ages at the time of this story (so you don’t have to do math):

Reader: 28

Benny: 35

Will: 38

Joel: 50

*Reader is ethnicity inclusive despite stock photo bias

**If you want to be added to the taglist, join here or let me know!

<<Chapter 7

Santi’s daughter, Leila, makes a full recovery, her fever breaking just after the second cup of tea. His wife hadn’t left Leila’s side since she got sick, but as Leila gained her strength back, his wife pulled you into a big hug, tears running down her face as she thanked you for everything.

“Joel was right - you are an angel.”

A couple of days later, you’re lacing up your boots to head home, your heart desperately needing your boys. All…3? You’re not sure what’s happening with Joel, but you want to see them anyway. Santi walks you to the door as his wife reads Leila a book in her bedroom.

“Ghost, I- I can’t thank you enough for this. I tried everything I could and she…she could’ve…” you see tears starting to slowly fall from his eyes and you pull him in, hugging him tightly as he cries into your shoulder.

“You’re a great dad, Santi. I can see it.”

He pulls back from you, wiping his eyes on his sleeve. “Thank you, hermosa. I- thank you. You’ll be ok walking home? Weren’t you supposed to wait for Joel?”

“I’ll be fine.”

Santi opens the door and you hear a southern drawl meet you.

“I thought I told you I was goin’ to escort you.” Joel was standing with one hip cocked, both hands on his hips.

“Well I couldn’t wait around for you all day. The Garcia’s need their home back.”

“You’re welcome back any time, hermosa. We mean it. Anything you need, we’re here.”

“Thanks, Santi.” You give him one last quick hug before turning to follow Joel. He leads you to your home and you groan as you push the key in the lock to open the door.

“Everythin’ alright?” Joel follows you in as you shut the door behind you.

“Yeah I just…I’m just gonna grab some clothes real quick and shower at your place. My hot water is virtually non-existent here and will take forever to heat up.”

Joel nods and walks around your living space, looking at everything you have out. You’re not sure why you’re nervous, something about the man seeing your things feels…personal. Like you would be judged. You shrug it off and head to your room, gathering up some clothes and such that you’ll need. You’re about to tell Joel it’s time to go when you yell.

“Shit!”

Slapping your forehead, you rush to your kitchen and Joel joins you, concern deep on his face.

“What is it, angel?”

“I forgot to leave out food for Pockets!” You grab up any food you can find and stuff it in another bag, seeing the questioning look on Joel’s face.

“It’s for the raccoon in the alley. I…named him Pockets.”

He simply nods, as if he wasn’t surprised, and you walk past him, grabbing your backpack and bow as you both head out the front door. Stopping in the alley briefly to leave the food in Pocket’s normal spot, you follow Joel back to the Miller home. He explains that Will is off in another sector overseeing some backend reports and Benny has another day of training.

Entering their home, you feel all of the tension of the last week leave your body. You audibly sigh, setting down your bow and your bag, looking around for a moment as if you’d forgotten what the place looked like.

“I’m going to shower,” you tell Joel as you grab your backpack, heading down the hallway to the guest bathroom.

“When you get out, I’ll make us some lunch.”

“Sounds good!”

Closing the door behind you, you quickly shed the clothes that you’d been wearing since you left, tossing them in a pile to wash later. The shower springs to life and warms up within a minute, and you get in, audibly moaning as the hot water hits your bare skin. Taking your time to wash, you watch as the dirt from your skin and hair mixes with the water, swirling down the drain in quick circles. Once you’re clean, you stand there for a few more minutes, enjoying the way your muscles relax under the heat and water. Once you start to feel the water get slightly cooler, you know it’s time to get out. You want the hot water to heat back up in time for Will and Benny to shower later.

Stepping out, you towel yourself off, brushing your teeth just to get the stale taste out. You pull on a tank top and shorts, knowing you’ll probably get cold later tonight but not really caring at the moment. Making your hair presentable, you leave the bathroom and head into the kitchen, moving around to make some lunch.

“I thought I said I’d make lunch.” Joel is leaning against the door frame, his arms crossed as you continue to make some sandwiches.

“I don’t mind. Really. Gives me something to do.”

He doesn’t move but instead gives in to your idle chatter, telling him all about Pockets and when you first got to Boston. Both of you stand in the kitchen, eating your lunch and chatting, making the whole thing seem very domestic. Joel cracks a joke at something just as you were taking a drink and you sputter, coughing as you half choke half laugh at what he said. You grab a rag and dry yourself off as best you can, turning to look at Joel.

“You missed a spot, angel.”

You swipe the rag across your chest and raise your eyebrows at him.

“No, it's higher.”

You swipe the rag higher up, but Joel shakes his head chuckling.

“Nope.”

“Come on, Joel! Is there something even there?” You furiously try to dab at your skin.

In 2 steps Joel is in front of you, lightly grabbing your chin and tilting your head up to expose your neck. He swipes his thumb across the underside of your chin, down the side of your neck, gathering up the water you missed. His thumb crosses over the mostly faded bruise marks around your neck from where the man had tried to choke the life out of you. He gently grazes the skin there, turning your head to the other side to check on the bruising there. Both of his hands are on your neck now, fingers wrapped around the back of your head, and his thumbs have moved to the underside of your jaw, gently tracing the line of it. Your heart races as he caresses your skin, every touch leaving a burning sensation that spreads over your body. When his eyes finally find yours, you recognize that look from before - dark and full of desire. He moves his head down and you close your eyes, but his lips don’t find yours. Instead, he rests his forehead on yours.

“I’m so much older than you, angel.” You can feel his warm breath on your face, feeling how they have become deeper, as if trying to contain himself.

“I don’t care.”

“22 years.”

“That just means you have more…experience..s…”

“Don’t tempt me.”

“Don’t tempt you? When you t-touch me l-like this? I feel like-” you let out a breath as Joel moves to the side of your neck, his Romanesque nose gently tracing a path down and you hear him inhaling your scent. Your hands come up and slowly cup his face, pulling him up to meet your gaze, pouring all of your desire for him into your eyes. He moves his head down slowly, his lips just barely touching yours in the softest kiss you’ve ever received. He pulls back and takes a few breaths, staring into your eyes.

And then the restraint snaps.

He surges forward, pulling you to him and licking at your lips, begging for entry. You part your lips and he pushes in, your tongues dancing around each other as he glides his across your bottom teeth. Your hands slide around to the back of his head, winding into the curls that you’ve been dying to touch since you met him, and you give a small tug. Joel moans into your mouth and grabs your hips, pushing you into the counter as he squeezes your skin. His hands start to travel up and down your body, tracing your curves and lines before he finds the bottom of your shirt and tugs it up. You break the kiss to toss it off and Joel moves to undo your bra in one swift motion and you toss it in the same general direction as your shirt. He looks down at your chest and his tongue darts across his bottom lip as he bends down, lifting a boob and running his nose along it. He finally takes one into his mouth and sucks gently, swiping his tongue over your nipple as he takes the other boob in his hand, slowly and gently rolling that nipple between his fingers.

“Oh fuck,” you whine out at his touch.

Your hands grip his biceps, trying to find purchase as he continues to suck and bite at your boobs, switching from one to the other. He slowly kisses up your chest and neck, his lips finding yours again and you throw your arms around his neck, pulling him to you as you toss your leg over his hip as you deepen the kiss. After a few moments, your arms trace down his body, feeling just how broad his shoulders are as you finally find the bottom of his shirt. You grip it and start to inch it up but a firm grasp on your wrist stops you as Joel pulls back from the kiss.

“I’m not as..fit as my brothers, angel.”

“I couldn’t give any less fucks, Joel. I want to feel your skin on mine.” You try and lift it again but he squeezes your wrist.

“Angel, I-” and you see the embarrassment in his features. “-I’m just so much older.”

You push him back slightly and for a moment, he looks hurt. Until you drop to your knees, gently pulling the bottom of his shirt out. You look up at him with big doe eyes as you move closer, making sure to use his shirt to cover your eyes as your lips find the bare skin of his stomach. You place a few kisses and hear his breathing hitch as you swirl your tongue around his happy trail. You slide your hands inside his shirt, gently caressing his sides as you continue to kiss and lick his lower stomach.

“I feel nothing that I don’t want to see Joel.” You drop his shirt and stand back up, his eyes nearly black with lust.

“I like you, Joel. I want all of you. But if you’re not ready, that’s ok too. I-” you’re cut off by the sudden motion of Joel all but ripping the shirt from his body, throwing it aside and watching your face as you scan down his exposed chest.

“You’re beautiful, Joel.”

His tanned skin stretches across broad shoulders and down to a slimmer waistline. He has some chest hair that picks back up under his bellybutton, curling down into his pants. Your eyes roam over his skin, noticing all of the scars and marks from his hard life and over the swell of a tiny tummy. You reach out and drag your nails across his chest, feeling him growl under your hands as he kisses you hard, pulling you to him so your skin makes contact. He’s warm and soft, your nipples hardening as his skin grazes them. He grips your hips and starts to walk you backwards towards his room, pausing once to scan your face for consent, which you give him by pulling on his pants towards the room.

Joel’s room is the biggest in the home - king sized bed with an en suite bathroom. It’s not heavily decorated, a picture of him with his brothers on the dresser in a basic frame and a painting of a farm hanging on the wall. Joel closes the door and walks back over to you, pulling your face to him to kiss you. His hands roam down to find your shorts and he slides them down and they drop to the floor with your panties and you kick them off across the room. Your hands find his pants and you undo the button and zipper, sliding them down his legs as he kicks them off along with his boxers. Both of you step back to take the other in.

“You really are an angel.” Joel says in awe.

You roll your eyes playfully as you hop onto the bed, scooting back and curling your finger to beckon him over. He obliges, climbing onto the bed and hovering over you as you lay down, kissing you deeply before continuing down your neck. He pays some more attention to your boobs, loving the way you shift beneath him as you whine. He continues his path down your body and just before he reaches your core, he pushes your legs open wide. His face hovers over your apex as he stares down at you hungrily. He turns his face, kissing along your inner thigh and sucking a hickey there. He moves towards your core when you find your voice.

“Wha- what are you doing?”

“I’m gonna taste you, angel.”

“What..do you mean?”

Joel’s head pops up as he stares at you, looking for any indication of a joke. Finding none, he looks shocked.

“Has no one ever tasted you before?”

“What does that mean? Tasted?”

“Oh angel. You just lay back and let me show you. I promise I’ll take care of you. Do you trust me?”

You swallow hard but nod. “Of course.”

“Lay back, angel. I’ve got you.”

You lay back on the pillows, feeling very self conscious of Joel’s face between your legs. He starts kissing your inner thighs again, moving around your pubic area. You feel heat rising in your core as he runs his nose through your curls. He continues this for a little bit and you feel the tension inside you building. You’re not sure what he means by “taste” because all he’s done so far is-

Oh.

Joel flattens his tongue and licks up you from entrance to clit, swirling his tongue around your bundle of nerves.

“Oh shit!” you cry out, your body slamming your legs together and knocking into Joel’s head. He chuckles and you feel it vibrating through you, crying out again as he grabs both of your legs and pushes you wide open. He shoves his broad shoulders a little further between your legs, using them to hold you open. Propping yourself up just enough to look between your legs, Joel looks at you, his eyes nearly black with lust as he gives you a wink and a smirk, lowering his head back down.

He starts slow, alternating using the tip of his tongue and flattening it as he licks you up and down, surprising you when he randomly circles your clit. He traces your entrance and you moan as he glides away from it, moving back up to tap at your bundle of nerves. He slides back down but this time, his tongue pushes inside you as he fucks you with it.

“Fucking hell, Joel,” you whine out, you hands moving to grip the back of his head.

You tug the hair you find and he growls, vibrating your entire center and you gasp at the sensations. He pulls his tongue out and slides his nose up your seam, following it with his tongue. He arrives at your clit and caresses it with his tongue, bringing his hand up to swirl a finger around your entrance. He gathers up enough of your arousal to gently and easily slide into you and your head flies back, mouth open in a silent O as he pulls out and adds a second finger.

He slowly slides his fingers in and out as he circles your bundle of nerves with his tongue, caressing it now and again with his nose. Sliding them in once more, he curls his fingers and taps on a soft spot inside you that has you crying out, pulling his hair tighter.

“I got you, angel. Just feel me.”

Joel starts to scissor his fingers, tapping that spot repeatedly while paying extra attention to your sensitive clit, and you get lost in the feeling of it all - simultaneously not enough and way too much stimulation, you feel the heat in your belly raging, shoving you towards the edge. A few more gentle taps from Joel has you seeing stars, screaming his name while you tense with the power of your orgasm, holding him to you as he continues, guiding you through your release. Once the waves of pleasure start to subside, you loosen your grip on Joel and he pushes up to crawl over you, watching your face as his own glistens with your arousal.

“How you feelin’, angel?” His fingers brush some hair aside from your face as he stares down at you.

You don’t answer right away, savoring the lingering effects of your orgasm. Joel chuckles knowingly and leans down to kiss you gently. You find your voice when he breaks the kiss.

“How did…what…how do you know how to do…that?”

“Well angel, like I said - I’m so much older than you. Got some experiences that others wouldn’t.”

“That’s for fuck sure. That was…I’ve never…fuck.”

You feel his erection press against your opening, but he makes no move to thrust into you, choosing to study your face instead.

“We don’t have to do anythin’ else if you don’t want to, angel.”

Your face gets serious at this. “I want to…do you?”

“No man can resist the desire of a beautiful woman, especially one he cares about. But I don’t want you to feel like you owe me anythin’.”

Thinking that he sounds exactly like his brother, but opting to keep that to yourself, you place your hands on either side of his face, making sure he’s looking at you when you speak.

“You care for me?”

Joel takes a deep breath. “I haven’t been familiar with this feeling in quite some time, but..you’ve dug your way into my head. I can see why they didn’t want to let you go.”

You rub your thumbs over his cheeks and smile. “I care for you too, Joel.”

Smiling at each other, you trace his patchy facial hair with your thumbs.

“Not to sound overly dramatic, Joel. But if you don’t fuck me I will literally die.”

A deep laugh erupts from Joel and you’re joining in, both laughing until tears come out the corners of your eyes.

“Not to sound overly dramatic, huh?” The laughter starts to fade and he leans forward to kiss you, stopping to speak against your lips.

“How can I say no?”

He pushes in as he kisses against your open mouth, now stuck in an O shape as you feel him stretch you. He’s bigger than his brothers and you feel every ridge, every vein, every inch as he makes his way inside you fully. When he finally bottoms out, he moans into your mouth, both of you breathing heavily as he gives you a moment to adjust.

“Shit, angel. You feel..ngh… fuckin’ amazin’.”

Chest heaving, you manage to choke out “You…stretch me so…good.”

Joel groans and pulls out of you to slowly inch back in, moaning the entire way, just feeling you and letting you feel him.

“Please…please..” You need him to move or not move, something, anything. All you know is you want him.

“I don’t want to…ugh…hurt you, angel. Givin’ you a..ngh..moment to….shit…adjust.”

Joel leans down to kiss your neck, lightly sucking and something in you breaks. Shifting your head so you speak into his ear, your voice quiet and filled with desire.

“Rail me, daddy.”

Joel snaps and he bites your shoulder, pulling his hips back to slam into you, the sound of skin slapping against skin filling the room. Little whines escape your throat with every thrust as Joel moves you up the bed. He lets go of your shoulder and moves to your neck, latching on, loving the way your arms wrap around him, nails scraping down his back as you pant out incoherently.

He releases your neck and slides his hand down, gripping your thigh and hooking it above his hip changing the angle, each thrust now causing stars to sprint across your vision. He grabs your wrists next and pins them above your head, moving down to take a nipple in his mouth.

“Fuking hell! Shit!” Your brain turns to mush as all you can feel is Joel, his scent mixing with the smell of sex filling your nose as you hear him whimper and grunt above you. He picks up the pace, thrusting a little harder when he’s fully inside so he hits that spot in the back of you.

“Joel, I’m gonna..” that’s all the warning you have as your orgasm comes crashing into you, wave after wave of pleasure pulsing over you as you chant his name, unable to move as your entire body was pinned by him. Feeling his hips start to sputter as you come down, you know he’s close.

“I can’t wait to feel you fill me up.” You say it with all the lustful innocence you can muster and it works.

Joel cries out, thrusting hard once into you as he comes, spilling himself inside you as he grips your wrists tighter, pushing them deeper into the bed. His hips thrust into you a few more times, each one less intense than the last as he comes down, breathing heavily and collapsing on top of you, releasing your wrists finally. You shake them a little to wake them and then bring them to his head, massaging his scalp as your other hand trails across his back. He shutters once before he fully relaxes into you, groaning at your touch. As you gently scratch his head, you push the hair back from behind his ears and see a tiny M tattoo there, matching his brothers.

You stay like that for several minutes before Joel picks his head up to look at you and you move your hand to trace the bald patches in his beard.

“I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

Smiling, you shake your head. “No way. I loved every minute.”

He nods, looking away from you for a moment. “I haven’t…not in a long time.”

“Really? That was your out of practice? Fuck,” you whisper the last word but you still see a small smile appearing on his face.

“I’m honored you’d choose me, Joel.”

“Choose you? Angel, I was yours the moment you held up that knife to my throat.”

Chuckling, you replay the memory in your mind. “That was an interesting first meet.”

Joel pulls out of you and cleans you up, moving to lay next to you so you can cuddle up against him, hand on his chest and leg tossed over his. A couple minutes pass in silence, caressing each other’s skin.

“So..does this mean I have 3 boyfriends now?”

You feel the rumble from Joel’s chest. “You think you’d be ok with an old man like me?”

“An old man who’s sexy as fuck, has those silver hairs that drive me wild, a patchy beard I adore, who has my back, cares for me, AND fucks me like that? I’d be the dumbest person in creation to turn that down. And Joel?” you turn your head up to meet his eyes. “I’ve always had a thing for older men.”

He pulls you up to give you a kiss as you both fall asleep in each other’s arms, thoroughly spent.

—----

You wake a couple hours later, watching Joel move about the room getting dressed.

“Going somewhere?”

“I was tryin’ not to wake you, angel. Yeah, I got a meetin’ with some people to help them move some stuff.”

You nod, knowing he can’t tell you everything and you weren’t going to ask. Sitting up, you find your shorts and shirt, pulling them on as Joel sits on the edge of the bed, sliding on his socks. You watch him concentrating on his socks and a wave of some emotion overtakes you. Walking to stand in front of him, he looks up at you as you push hair out of his face. Leaning down to kiss him, you bend and toss your legs over either side of him, straddling him as you throw your arms around his neck and feel his wrap around you. Making out for a few moments, Joel pulls away reluctantly.

“I…have to go, angel.”

“I know. Just…please be safe.”

He meets your eyes and kisses your nose once.

“Always am.”

—-

Chapter 9>>

General Taglist:

@frankie-catfish-morales @chaoticgeminate @janebby @astoryisaloveaffair @balekanemohafe @softpedropascal @greeneyedblondie44 @hoeforthefictional @marvelousmermaid @hauntedmama @giuliarogers-blog @icanbeyourjedi @diaryofkali @sunnshineeexoxo @livingmydreams13 @adventures-of-a-noodle @sara-alonso @theewokingdead @punkerthanpascal @giggly-otter @f0rever15elf @phandoz @dirtytissuebox @jadore-andor @gallowsjoker @lovesbiggerthanpride @sarahmilesbendrix @booksarekindaneat @mrsudontknowme @swol-bear @charlispersonallyhell @xoxabs88xox @amneris21@gooddaykate @alindeluce @avengers-fixation @paintballkid711

Joel Miller Taglist:

@spanishmossmagnolia @xowlan @rosechvnel @maievdenoir

Meet the Millers Taglist:

@miraclesabound @coco-pebbles @evergreenriver @wildmoonflower

[thehopelessromanticclub]

That's How You Start a War

Pairing: Jimin x Reader

Genre: Fluff, A bucket full of it. established relationship, non-idol au.

Word count: 1.5k

Summary: you can sneeze at your girlfriend but don't ever eye roll at her. yup! that's the summary and the moral.

Warning: this can give you cavities. (it's sweet😉)

A/N: I wrote this for my best friend aka my partner in crime, but decided to post it. I hope you guys enjoy it. [sending virtual hugs...]

“Okay, that’s it for today. Be sure to submit your thesis by the end of this week.” The professor said before making her way out of the class.

“So, Y/N, the usual?” your best friend asked appearing out of nowhere, shoving her hands on your shoulder watching your figure hurriedly packing all your supplies into your bag or more like shoving them into your bag. Before she knew it, she witnessed your figure running out of the class so fast that even light would become jealous.

You were in your 1st year studying medicine, while your lovely boyfriend of 2 years was in the IT department. You never got to see him owing to the busy schedule and the different departments but you still made sure to have lunch with him during the break.

Your eyes couldn’t spot his petite figure among the countless number of students gathered for their lunchtime which was very unusual. He was the kind of guy who would just run to you to give you a bone-crushing hug as soon as you entered the mess(canteen) before whispering tons of I love you’s and I miss you’s. a tap on your shoulder interrupted your train of thoughts.

“Being sneaky today huh, Mr. Park?” you asked before turning 180° expecting it to be Jimin, but you were welcomed by his best friend aka soulmate, Taehyung.

“Jimin didn’t come today. He called in sick. I wasn’t supposed to tell you this as Jimin had strictly prohibited me from doing so but I couldn’t help, Afterall you’re his girlfriend and you have every right to know. Something, that dumbo won’t understand.” He recited the whole scenario.

“Ahh…okay. Thanks, Tae, for informing me, or Mr. Jiminiepabo would’ve never told me.” He laughed at the nickname you just gave to your beloved boyfriend.

“I’ll take my leave now. Bye Y/n.” he said before going over to his group of friends.

Now, knowing that your boyfriend was sick, all you wanted to do was bunk school and take care of him until he felt better but all you could do at the moment was wait for the school to get over before you could rush towards him.

Time skip

Standing in front of his apartment inhabited by him and probably some rats, you took out the spare keys he once gave you to use in case of emergencies. On opening the door, you were welcomed by nothing but silence. The living room was a mess with books, clothes thrown here and there as if they owned the territory.

You quickly mounted your way up the stairs to his bedroom ready to scold him for not telling you but the sight before your eyes made you forget all that was on your mind. There he was sleeping wrapped in a pile of blankets like a burrito.

Softly parting his hair that fell on his forehead blocking your vision of his face, you analyzed his temperature. You could tell he at least had a 105 F fever, yet this man didn’t want to share the fact with his girlfriend.

Somewhere deep inside you regretted the decision that you took medicine instead of its comparatively easier counterparts. but it was moments like this that you felt proud for choosing the medical stream. Or who would treat your poor baby!!!

“Y/N?” Jimin called out your name removing you from your thoughts.

“Did you wake up? I’m sorry I didn’t mean to wake you up.”

“When and why did you come here?”

“And what is that question of yours supposed to mean? Of course, I came here to treat and look after you.” You said stating the obvious.

“But I’m fine, after I take my meds, I will be fit as a fiddle.”

“Says the one, who still hasn’t taken any meds.”

“Ahh, you got me there.” He said dramatically placing his hand on his heart (on the wrong side) as if he got shot.

“For your kind information Mr. Park, your heart is on the other side.” You said while he scratched the back of his neck due to embarrassment.

“Do you even know how worried I was when I got to know that you were sick? I swear Park Jimin if you were not sick, you would’ve been lying on your deathbed already because I would’ve killed you. Why do you even date a doctor when you don’t want to get yourself treated by her. Just think about it, you neither have to pay for the consultation fees nor the medicines. I want to beat you so bad right now, I swear Jimin if you keep anything hidden from me now, I won’t talk to you.” You kept on with your babbling, non-stop complaints oozing from your mouth, while you picked out his medicines. All the while Jimin kept staring at you looking ever so cute complaining with a pout.

Jimin kept on wondering how did he get so lucky to have you by his side.

“Here, take your meds.” You gave him his medicine which he took in no time without complaining which took you by surprise because the Park Jimin you knew, could go hours and hours on his hatred for pills.

“I’ll go and make soup for you.” You turned to make your way to the kitchen when he said,

“I love you.” Time seemed to stop at that moment. Just like in the movies, everything was going in slow motion. A soft smile playing on his lips, his eyes twinkling, the sunlight from the windows kissing his skin ever so gently, everything was so ethereal. Yup! this man right here is your boyfriend and there’s no denying it. It’s not the first time he said nor was it like he never said it, but every time he did it immediately teleported you to cloud 9. The feeling of euphoria and the butterflies in your stomach overtake you every time those words hit your eardrum. 

“Woah, that was so random.” You managed to decipher without stuttering despite the utter chaos inside of you, to which he just smiled and dismissed you. “Now go.”

Time skip

A loud crash echoed in the apartment when you accidentally nudged the tall glass of water from the counter. Pieces of the broken glassware were scattered all over the wooden floor and for a few seconds, you only stared at them mindlessly with a wince on your face clueless about what to do. 

“Y/N?” soon after, there’s a voice calling for you. The voice of your beloved boyfriend. The voice wanting to ask you millions of questions, are you ok? are you hurt somewhere? What was that sound?

 “Don’t worry Jimin-ah, I’m not hurt, and don’t you dare come downstairs unless you’d want me to whoop your ass.” You answered all his questions even before they were thrown at you.

You collected all the shards of broken glass and got back to your cooking, making sure your clumsy ass did not act up again.

Time skip

With the soup ready and served, you placed it carefully on the tray before making your way upstairs.

“Yah! I told you to rest up, why are you on your phone? It can strain your eyes.” You snatched away his phone, placing the bowl of soup carefully on his lap.

“I’m sorry mom.” He apologized holding his ears making you chuckle. Damn, if being cute was a crime, Park Jimin would be guilty as charged. Oh, how you wanted to always keep him in your pocket, away from this cruel world.

“Now eat it before it gets cold.”

As he was about to take up his first spoon, he pulled it away gently, scrunching his nose as if about to sneeze.

“What happened?”

“I was about to sneeze.” He said, his sneeze now long gone. “Aaaa.” He opened his mouth wide, curious to taste the soup which you made so lovingly for him, just for him. You forwarded the spoon in order to feed him but… “Achoo.” There goes the sneeze. Great!

Y/N’s POV

Jimin opened his eyes, finally relieved now that the tickling sensation in his nose was gone, only for the reality to hit him. He sneezed right on your face. Oh wait, did I tell you, he’s got a clumsy ass?

“OMG. I’m so sorry Y/N. I didn’t mean it.” he apologized, panic visible on his face while he grabbed the towel lying by his side, quickly patting my face with it. Aww, how adorable he looked. Are you sure he’s a human?

AUTHOR’s POV

Oh, how scared he was, not knowing how you would react. You were here helping him, while he just sneezed right on your face. The perfect plot to upset your girlfriend. Or maybe not.

You broke into hysterical laughter finding the whole situation funny, while Jimin was confused all along. Why were you laughing when he sneezed right on your face?

“Really Jimin? On my face?”

“I’m sorry, it was just so sudden.” The pout on his lips, can I kiss him already.

“But still…” you managed to let out in between your laughter.

“Don’t make me feel worse than I already am.” He complained.

“Ok ok, am sorry. But you should’ve looked at your face. You looked as if you committed a crime.”

“Yeah yeah, whatever.” He rolled his eyes, not liking your continuous teasing.

“Did you just roll your eyes at me? PARK JIMIN YOU ARE SO DEAD.”

And that’s how you start a war.

[bay-did-nothing-wrong]

Tell All (Donatello x Reader)

Synopsis: Don and the Reader had been hiding their relationship from his family but they decide its finally time to come clean.

Genre: Fluff mostly, some crack, literally one sex pun

Word count: 1946

Soft.

So soft.

Wasn't his skin supposed to be rougher all together? How were his lips so soft and smooth then? Just another mystery.

Your mouths split with a tiny wet sound, but neither of you was in a rush to go anywhere.

But you should have been.

"Dinner's ready!" came Mikey's energetic shout from somewhere withing the lair. Probably the kitchen.

A soft longing sigh left your lips, and you felt a warm current of air hit your face - Don felt the same.

"We should go." you state, convincing yourself as much as him.

"Do we have to?" he whined breathlessly.

Yes, yes, you did. And he knew that. You both did. Otherwise his brothers and his very observant father will notice you're acting suspicious. They'll probably figure out he wasn't just helping you study for that AP Statistics exam. That is, if they hadn't already.

Your hands slid down his shoulders in an attempt to separate you two but instead they fell onto the top of his plastron, thumbs running softly over the last uncovered skin there, where you knew he was sensitive.

"Hmmm..." it came out as a low growl and it surrounded you on all sides. "You're not helping."

"Am I ever?"

"DONNIE! (Y/N)! DINNER!" at least Mikey stuck to the strict "No entering during study-sessions" rules. That's good to know that he can be intimidated into compliance. Or blackmailed... Point is, it worked.

Donnie's head falls in defeat, forehead leaning on yours for support.

So glad he took those goggles off. You can see more of him this way.

He sighed again, defeated - he was too smart to not figure out that at some point your behavior will raise suspicion. His head lifted back, and turned to the door.

"Coming!"

And your cheeky ass giggled at that.

"Oh, Donnie." you teased, "I haven't even started."

"Pfft. " chuckle, and a snort.

He really did like your dirty puns.

The man took your hand into his cool giant one, somehow providing comfort like no other, as he pulled you to the lab entrance. But once at the door you had to split. It's part of the arrangement.

His family shouldn't know about you.

You two decided at the early stage of your budding romance that keeping the whole thing on the down-low for a while was the smartest choice. It would prevent his brother's jealousy, it won't incite any fights, it won't change their relationship with you and you'll get to feel things out at your own pace - no pressure or prying eyes.

Just you.

But there was a list of downsides too. For one, neither of you was a great actor, Don was even shit at lying, so you'd had to take extra steps to remain as friendly-looking as possible. Then there was the trying-to-set-you-up-with-Vern thing that April was doing and every time the topic came up you could act regular-disgusted but not in-a-happy-relationship disgusted, and so would your favourite turtle. And then there was the hiding, coveting each other in the lab or in small stolen moments in the lair, and the lying about going topside to do recon or install something somewhere, the covering up - no, of course Donnie wasn't with you at your place, he must have gone somewhere else.

You were quite honestly sick of it. You were ready to tell his brothers. You were ready to tell the world.

"We should tell them." his voice was once again low, quiet as if to preserve the last few moments of the secret to yourselves.

Once again you were entirely in sync despite being vastly different.

He was a genius, you, decidedly, weren't.

He was really into sports, you weren't.

He was a 6'8 ninja turtle raised underground by a rat dad, and you obviously were not.

And yet somehow, you clicked.

"I agree."

At that point you knew that your approval would kick into gear the most destructive process in Donnie's mind - overthinking.

Your hand immediately darted out and grabbed one of his pulling it up to your lips and kissing the knuckles in reassurance.

"We'll figure it out."

But still, you had to split. Even if you did plan to tell them, there would be a time and a place for that.

"What took you so long? The lasagna got cold." Mikey was positively outraged - as much as he could be - by your lack of interest in his usually excellent cooking.

"Sorry, Mikey." you butted in, trying to save the day, "There's just something about Inferential Statistical Analysis that I can't wrap my head around." Bullshit, you knew exactly what it was and how it worked - it's part of the basics but he didn't need to know that.

"Still smells great though!" Don sounds cheerful enough even though you'd just agreed to break the fragile peace in your relationship just a minute prior. He was getting really good at the lying part. Too bad it won't be needed for much longer.

Dinner was as uneventful as it can be around five mutant ninjas. Master Splinter asked about your day, you told him about the nearing finals season and he offered some comforting words after which the conversation bounced around the rest of the family in a natural progression.

Once you were full, and once all of Mikey's delicious food had been virtually inhaled by the four giant men around you, you got up to get the dishes to the kitchen and help clean up. It was only fair, after all.

Apparently it was Ralph's turn to wash dishes and there was no wiggling out of that because Splinter said so. Well, at least you can dry them.

And dry them you did, meanwhile casual conversation about whatever kept flowing and you figured you won't be able to go back to the lab and do some more 'Statistics'.

You were just drying and putting away the last plate when a thiqq arm stretched over your head to reach a cupboard you couldn't even get to in your dreams.

Your head whipped back, eyes landing straight on some hard looking chest plates under a pair of suspenders. And then you looked up and saw Donatello, the cheeky shit, with a pop tart in his mouth and a shit-eating grin around it.

"Oops, sorry, (Y/N), didn't see you there."

Oh, I'll give you Oops, didn't see me, my ass. You'll see.

He was being unusually open about his closeness to you and that was less then an hour after you'd decided to come clean.

He was ready then.

"I was planning on checking out the meatpacking District tomorrow." Leo was going on about that idea he had to check out some building or another, Mikey was wiping down the table, and Raph was finishing up the dishes, and for once Don was just there chilling.

His treat was gone, meaning he ate it all, he seemed relaxed, his shoulders loose and shell leaning on the wall.

No time like the present.

"You guys, I'm gonna head out. I've got work tomorrow and after that I've got a study group to attend so, I should head to bed."

"You need us to walk you home?" Leo asked more out of courtesy, he knew you lived close and would usually decline.

"No, no, that's okay." you replied, looking for your bag and jacket where you'd left them near the kitchen table.

"Aaaw, you're leaving already? Well, at least you ate." Mikey quickly swept you into a hug goodbye and turned back to sorting his ingredients in the cupboards.

"Thanks to you, Mikey Steward." to which he giggled in response.

"See you tomorrow, shorty." Raph waved as he turned to get a beer from the fridge.

"Stay safe out there, okay?" Leo always the guardian, warned you for the hundredth time, again just out of courtesy.

And then you walked to where Don was leaning on the wall, took his chin in your hand and pulled him down.

Oh, shit, am I actually gonna do this!?

Your lips met, your heart pounded, the room became super hot and that wasn't just because of the brilliant piece of man-candy in your hands. You could feel their eyes but then again that was the whole point.

A loud dramatic intake of air was heard, a drop of something metallic and then silence.

Your face pulled away from him, eyes opening slightly to look at him, as your weight fell back onto your heels from standing on your tiptoes. His face had that same dazed, satisfied-yet-hungry look that he usually had whenever you'd had to break apart.

He tasted so sweet, you just had to lick your lips at the memory.

"I'll see you tomorrow." you whispered, that was all you could force out in that moment.

"See you tomorrow." his voice was as soft as yours even though his brothers could probably hear.

You fully pulled away from your man, now certain that there'd be no secrets between you and the ninja clan.

You were not an actor, you quickly got embarrassed with your performance, however brilliant it may have been, and speedily scammed to pick up your belongings and jogged outta there.

You turned one last time, because something in you said you should and what you saw was truly a sight.

All three of Don's bothers with their mouths hanging open and Splinter peeking out of the door to the dojo with his eyes like saucers and then there's Donnie - the image of peace, hands in his pockets, a soft smile on his lips, now shiny from your lip gloss, and looking you straight in the eye as you retreated.

"Bye." you shout to no one in particular and scramble for the exit.

-_-_-_-_-

Phone - charging

Alarm - set

Pajamas - on

What's missing then?

Ding!

Your phone notified you that someone was requesting your attention and you were more than happy to find out it was your man.

'Hey, Laika' Oh lord it so got you giggling like a schoolgirl when he called you that.

'Hey, Tyson' and then he told you that he loved to be compared with the biggest name in astrophysics today.

'How did it go?' you felt super bad for bailing on him but at the same time there was this relief that came with the cat being out of the bag.

'Surprisingly well. No one was mad that we kept it a secret.' well, that's good. You won't have to jeopardize your relationship with the boys. 'Dad still wants to talk to you tho'

Ah, well, that's to be expected. Even though Donnie is an adult, the were still a very tightly knit family unit so, you supposed that something like that would be a pretty big deal.

'That's fine, I'd do whatever'

'I wish I could kiss you rn'

It honestly shocked you how chill about it he was. Probably because he wasn't being grilled for information anymore, neither of you would have to lie anymore, and because he could now tell Vern to fuck right off, with no worry about how it would look.

You were so looking forward to being solely and entirely his.

'Tomorrow we start anew'

He had a point, things would change. But hopefully not between you.

'Can't wait to meet you for the first time again lol' you didn't know if you were being funny or just cheesy but it felt right.

Despite your smile, your eyes started drooping, your breaths slowing and you felt the exhaustion of the day slowly hug you like a blanket.

'Goodnight'

'Goodnight, (Y/N)'

[legolasbadass]

Office Hours, Part 9

Summary: Lorelei Browning has just secured a job as an assistant professor at Exeter College in Oxford. Naturally, she is eager to prove herself and meet every challenge sent her way, but what she does not expect is the tall, handsome stranger who will quickly become much more than a colleague…

Relationship: Richard Armitage x OC (Professor AU)

Word Count: 3k

Rating: T (some chapters E)

A/N: Sorry for the long wait, life has been a bit hectic lately! Special thanks to @linasofia for helping me out with this one and always being there to send me inspiring photos or to send virtual hugs when I struggle with my writing. Love you wifey 💙

Read on AO3

In the following weeks, Richard and I grow even closer as we settle into the new rhythm of our shared life. At the college, we act as though we are nothing but colleagues, though we often can’t help but share lingering glances and soft smiles during meetings or across hallways. Then the night comes. Some evenings, we are both too busy with research or correcting, but usually, we work side by side, either at his house or my flat. We cook for each other, exchange advice over our papers or discuss books we are reading, and make love as often as we can. In other words, I have never been happier.

Fortunately, my worries about dating a colleague don’t seem to have had any real founding. Not only is it relatively easy to keep our relationship a secret—although it is hard not being able to go to the restaurant or the movies together, or even just for a walk outside—but it only fuels the passion between us. When no one is looking, Richard sometimes sends me the most intense gazes, or he will brush my hips imperceptibly as he passes by me. The notion that each glance, each touch between us is forbidden is incredibly arousing, and when we are finally alone, all the pent-up desire of the day comes crashing down and brings us to new heights of pleasure I would never have imagined could be possible. Just last night, I was cooking dinner at my flat and the moment he came in, this overwhelming need for him rose inside me, and we ended up making love on the kitchen counter, half-naked as we couldn’t even wait to be fully undressed. Heat rises up my cheeks at the memory, but I force myself not to think about it. Not here, in a classroom, while I’m packing up my things after a lecture.

“Professor Browning?”

“Yes?” I look up as I pull my bag over my shoulder and find one of my students, Jane, smiling at me.

“I was wondering if you had some time to discuss my paper topic quickly?” she asks.

“Of course! I’m going up to my office right now, but we can talk on the way,” I say as we head out into the packed hallway.

“I found both the prompt on ecocriticism and the one about literary influences really interesting and I wondered if it might be possible to combine them?

“Absolutely! I’m guessing you had something specific in mind?”

Smiling, she nods and says, “I’m interested in analyzing the significance of trees in Shakespeare and Tolkien.”

“That’s a great idea!” I say, smiling knowingly as we climb the large staircase leading to the offices. “Do you know what texts you’ll be focusing on?”

“I was thinking Lord of the Rings and Leaf by Niggle. For Shakespeare—definitely The Tempest, but Macbeth seems too obvious, so I still need to figure that out.”

As we reach my office, I place the keys in the lock and glance toward Richard’s office, trying to discern if he’s still here. “Oh,” I say in sudden realization, “do you know Professor Armitage?”

Jane’s eyes light up at the mention of his name and I have to bite my cheek to stop myself from smiling. “Yes, I know him! I’ve taken all his classes in the past two years—he’s great!”

“Yes, well, you could go to him and discuss your idea with him. I know he’d be more than happy to give you some suggestions.”

“Alright, I’ll do that!” she replies, her smile growing wider. “Thank you so much, professor. Have a great weekend!”

“You too, Jane!”

As she turns and heads toward the stairs, I step into my office, chuckling to myself and wondering if Richard knows how many of his students have a crush on him. Then a familiar hand stops me from closing the door.

“I was just thinking about you,” I remark as we step inside and he closes the door before anyone can see us.

He raises his eyebrows and smiles. “You were?”

Richard leans against the old wooden door, the soft umber of his tweed jacket the colour of the bookshelves that fill the walls of my office. The dark waves of his hair glow in the light of the setting sun which fills the room, and I can’t help but think how perfect he looks—as if he had been made to stand in these ancient rooms and all the knowledge they hold belonged to him.

“Yes, you see, I was just with one of your groupies.” I cross the room to set my books on my desk then turn to face him, smiling at the expression of utter confusion on his handsome face as he walks toward me, his arms now crossed over his chest so that his hands rest over the elbow patches on his jacket.

“My … what?”

“You groupies!” He continues to stare at me. “You really don’t know do you?”

“I know you’re not making any sense right now.”

Chuckling, I move toward him to wrap my arms around his chest. “I was just talking with Jane Taylor—apparently she’s taken all your classes in the last two years.”

Richard nods. “So?”

“Well, she’s in my Tolkien class and she just told me about a brilliant idea for her paper, but she wants to make a comparative argument with Shakespeare as well, so I told her she should go to you and ask for some advice. I tell you, the way her eyes lit up when I mentioned you … it’s true love.”

“Lorelei.”

“What?” I chuckle. “She’s not the only one, you know. You walk past them in the hallways and they just …” I press my hand over my chest and let out an overly dramatic sigh.

“Stop that,” he groans. “Jane Taylor asked me if I wanted to be her supervisor for her thesis. Why would you tell me that?”

I press my lips together and caress his back, feeling slightly guilty, but I love teasing him too much and I know he doesn’t really mind it. “Seriously, I can’t believe you didn’t notice.”

The frown on his face recedes and he offers me a tender smile, gazing deeply into my eyes. “Well, my mind was rather preoccupied with a certain groupie all these months.” Then, he leans in to kiss me, his lips soft against mine while his beard scratches my cheeks in that familiar, deeply intoxicating way.

When he pulls away, I smile and raise a hand to caress his hair. “You might want to pay attention to your students, Professor Armitage. It wouldn’t do for them to notice how distracted you are.”

“Hm, well maybe you should stop wearing low-cut blouses to work,” he replies teasingly, an enticing smirk floating to his lips.

I chuckle and shake my head, then ask, “Did you want something?” because I know that if there was a reason for his visit he’s on the verge of forgetting all about it.

Richard wraps his arms around my waist and pulls me tightly against him. “Do I need a reason to come see my girlfriend?” he says in a low, rumbling voice before pressing his lips against mine, and without thinking, I let my hands slide down to the hem of his shirt, then slip beneath it to skim his warm skin. His responding groan sends a familiar, pleasant wave of heat through me, and I have to force myself to pull away. “But as a matter of fact,” he goes on, squeezing me tight against him, “I did want to ask you something.”

“Oh?”

“What are you doing next weekend?”

“Hm, finals aren’t until the week after so I won’t be overwhelmed with correcting yet,” I ponder. “So, nothing, I think. Why?”

“Well, I told you about the British Shakespeare Association conference, right?” he asks and I nod. “I was wondering if you maybe wanted to come with me?”

A smile floats to my lips as I note the shyness in his voice. “To the conference?”

“It’s in Bath this year. The papers are only a few hours each day, so I was thinking I can go for a little while, present my paper, and then we’d have the rest of the weekend to ourselves. It would be nice to be able to go out in public for a change.…”

My smile widens. “I would love that!”

“Yeah?” Hope flashes in his eyes as though he had been worried I would reject his offer, so I hug him tightly.

“Yeah,” I repeat, then rise up on my tiptoes to press my lips against him. “And I’d love to listen to your paper—if you don’t mind.”

Richard looks away, shaking his head. “Oh, you don’t have to—”

“Richard, please, I want to,” I say, reaching out to force him to look back at me.

“You do?”

“Yes, I do,” I repeat emphatically. “I love hearing you talk about your research. You’re an amazing scholar and an even more amazing speaker. You’re so knowledgeable and passionate, it’s—it’s beautiful to watch.” A blush creeps onto his cheeks beneath his beard, and I smile softly.

“Alright,” he says after a moment, clearing his throat. “You can come for my paper.”

“Thank you,” I reply before welcoming his lips against mine once more.

The sound of approaching footsteps against the old wooden floor in the hallway makes us pull apart, but soon they fade away, leaving our secret safe.

“So, what time do you get home tomorrow?” Richard asks as he moves away to lean against the backrest of the armchair behind him.

“Er, the seminar goes until five so I should be home by 7,” I tell him, the fear of being discovered lingering inside me, tightening my chest.

“How about I come by and cook you dinner?”

“You’re perfect,” I say with a sigh, causing him to chuckle. “My knight in shining armour.”

“At your service, princess,” he replies with a wink.

My heart flutters in my chest, but I say, “Oh, I am not a princess. I am a badass warrior queen, thank you very much.”

Richard’s responding laugh is warm like the golden sun that pours in through the diamond grid window, and I melt as it caresses me, all worries gone from my mind.

“Alright then, see you tomorrow, my badass warrior queen.”

***

The following evening, I get home with a head even more full of ideas than my messy notebook. Richard called me an hour ago to let me know he would be here around 7:30, which leaves me with enough time to change into something more comfortable and do some work before he gets here. Unfortunately, my phone rings as soon as I sit at my desk and open my laptop, and I can’t hold back my sigh when I see that it’s my mum.

“Hi, mum,” I say, leaning back in my chair.

“Hi, darling, are you busy?”

“Uh, no, it’s fine,” I reply somewhat reluctantly. “How are you?”

“I’m great! What about you—how is everything? We haven’t talked in a while.”

“Yeah, sorry about that—I’ve been really busy. But I’m good. Really good. And work is just as amazing as it was the first day,” I say, smiling to myself while I glance over my emails.

“Oh, that’s good! I’m really glad to hear that,” she says. “Listen, your father and I would love for you to visit soon. You could come for dinner or—”

At that moment, the front door opens and Richard walks in. When his eyes fall upon me, he lifts up a bag of groceries and says, “I bring gifts for my queen—”

I immediately wave my free hand to silence him, but it’s too late.

“What was that?” my mum asks on the other end of the line. “Was that a man?”

“What?” I say while continuing to wave my hand as Richard looks at me with a puzzled frown.

“That was a man!” my mum exclaims. “Lorelei, are you seeing someone?”

“Mum, you don’t even know where I am—for all you know I could be on the street! And, I’m obviously not dating all the men out on the street that you might happen to overhear on the phone.”

“Are you on the street?” she asks pointedly.

A pause.

“No.”

“So are you?”

With a sigh, I turn to watch as Richard sets the groceries on the kitchen island, still eyeing me curiously. “Yes, I am.”

“Really?” I can almost see her surprised, but pleased smile as she speaks, and despite everything, I find myself smiling with her. “Oh, that’s wonderful! Since when? Why haven’t you told me about this?”

“Sorry, I’ve been so busy with work. …”

Guilt creeps up my neck at the excuse, and I know I won’t be able to evade the subject forever, but the last thing I want right now is for her to pass judgment on my relationship.

“Well I must meet this mystery man! You should both come over for dinner soon—”

“Oh, I don’t know—we’re both really busy lately,” I reply quickly, biting my lower lip.

She ignores me and says, “How does next weekend sound?”

“We can’t—he has work stuff.” I smile to myself once more at the thought of a whole weekend in Bath with Richard, free to go out in public without the fear of bumping into someone from work.

“How about the weekend after that? The 6th of November.”

“Uhhhh, I don’t know—”

“Wonderful!” she interjects, completely ignoring me once more. “We’ll see you then. Have a good evening, Lorelei.”

And with that, she hangs up and I let out a deep groan.

“What’s wrong?” Richard asks.

“That was my mum,” I begin as I walk over to the kitchen and accept the glass of wine he offers me with a grateful smile. “She wants to meet you and have dinner with us.”

Richard wraps an arm around my shoulders to pull me toward him. “Is that so terrible?”

“What—no, it’s not terrible. It’s just—I don’t know, I’m a bit nervous….”

“Why?” he asks, but he’s not insistent, only concerned. “I thought you and your parents got along really well.”

“We do, I’m just a bit worried about how they’ll react … to you,” I stammer, avoiding his eyes. A moment of silence follows, his hand moving to trace a soothing circle against my back, giving me the courage to go on. “I mean, you’re older than me and you’re my colleague. And while that doesn’t matter to me, not anymore,” I hastily add, “it will matter to them.”

“So that’s why you hadn’t told her yet.” When I look up at him, he says, “I figured that from your conversation on the phone. See, I’m a regular Sherlock, too.”

With a chuckle, I wrap my free arm around him and squeeze him tight. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell them earlier. It doesn’t mean anything—I hope you know that.”

“I know, don’t worry.” He leans in to press a soft kiss onto my lips, and the tightness in my chest recedes. After a moment, he pulls away and steps out of my embrace. “I’m going to start dinner now.”

“Alright, I just need to finish something quickly and then I can help you. Is that ok?”

“Of course,” he replies with a smile that makes my heart melt. “Do you mind if I put some music on?”

“Not at all,” I answer as I move back to my desk. “You can connect your phone to the speakers or you can browse through my records.”

With that, I turn my attention back to the Word document on my laptop, in which I started to write down some ideas for a new paper. Using the notes I took today, I write a few sentences and possible sources—but then the music starts. I let out a surprised chuckle as I recognize the first notes of ABBA’s Dancing Queen. The sight that greets me when I turn around is even more surprising. Richard is dancing in the kitchen, swaying his hips to the rhythm of the drums. Then, when the vocals kick in, he starts to sing along, using a wooden spoon as a microphone and causing me to burst out laughing.

“You’re crazy,” I giggle as I stand up and walk toward him with my glass of wine in hand, all thoughts of research gone from my mind. “I never would have guessed you were an ABBA fan.”

Richard smiles brightly, still dancing to the music. “If a person doesn’t like ABBA there’s something seriously wrong with them.”

“I’ve always said so,” I concur, smiling up at him. Then, with a small laugh, I say, “Thank God there’s nothing wrong with you.”

Richard laughs as he closes the space between us and kisses me deeply, our lips moving in a sensual dance that is becoming so familiar but never less intoxicating. His arms circle my waist, pressing me against his solid chest, and he starts to sway us from side to side. For a long while, the two of us dance and sing in the kitchen, giggling and sharing soft kisses, as the city outside fades into the night.

Later that evening, as we are reading together in bed, Richard sets the open book on his chest and looks down at me, his lips curling into a tired smile.

“I don’t know if I made that clear earlier, but I really don’t mind meeting your parents. In fact, I would love to meet them.”

“Really?” I ask in surprise, stifling a yawn.

“Of course. They’re an important part of your life—and I want to share every part of your life, Lorelei,” he says, unfaltering, and the tingles in my heart spread through my whole body.

I am so shocked by the honesty and ease with which he speaks these words that it takes me a long while to answer. “I do too, you know?”

We have not known each other very long, yet the words come easy to me. And I mean them. I mean them with my whole heart.

Richard smiles in response before moving to press a soft kiss onto my forehead as he places the book onto his nightstand.

“Goodnight, sweetheart.”

“Goodnight,” I reply, smiling as I cuddle against his broad chest.

—

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