#and if smth is actually bad or good even if it is a neutral thing

[piplupod]

i made the dire mistake of looking up a term that i saw in someone's DNI and finding. an entire... "community" of people who are ... uh. well there is something deeply deeply not okay with them oh my fucking god, i feel nauseous.

[hirokiyuu]

(ripping my hair out by the handful) Sol Is Not Trapped In The Time Loop Sol Is There Because They Choose To Be

[nomairuins]

we had fun tho the whole family hung out and we did some sporclee and chronophoto and then globle me n lamp nd father did globle bc mein mamma went to sleep. yay :]

[auspicioustidings]

141 fighting each other to be the one whose lap reader sits on during a meeting or smth

CONGRATS ON 1kkkk

Thanks <3 Please find silly nonsense below!

Tomfoolery Senses

Words: 1k

CWs: Slightly spicy but nothing explicit

Honestly you shouldn’t even be on base, not with your knee being how it was. It was annoying as hell that the recovery time meant you were out of the field for the foreseeable, but they still needed you. You may not be able to run around with a gun right now, but tactical was always your strong point anyway so for now you attended meetings and made plans.

You walked into one such meeting and your tomfoolery senses immediately went off. There were too many glinting eyes for them not to have pulled something, and when you went to sit down you nearly laughed out loud at the bloody audacity. No empty seats. Strange since there should be some, almost as if someone had relocated them beforehand specifically for some ridiculous purpose.

“Ye can sit here bonnie!”

It took a moment for your brain to catch up. Soap was very much patting his lap in excitement. The last time you had ended up in that man's lap his hand had wandered during the entire meeting. You recalled being a mess by the end of it and Soap being very much like the cat who got the cream about it because he knew it meant when he followed to your room like a puppy you would let him in.

“Move your arse MacTavish, I’m injured and I need the seat.”

“Wouldnae dream of it! As ye’ll recall, I also have a dodgy knee. Only right for us tae stick together.”

“Surely you’re not asking them to sit on your dodgy knee then Johnny? Come on sweetheart, right here.”

You gave Ghost a bemused look. Soap you expected this from, but him? Actually no, you had very much been overwatch for 141 missions, this is exactly the kind of nonsense you expected of this idiot.

“Now I would love to, but weren’t you just telling me about your bad back? I seem to remember something about needing me to massage it. It would be irresponsible of me to risk making it worse.”

“Your massage fixed it right up actually" he replied, large hand patting thick thigh in further invitation.

You rolled your eyes. Your “massage” had lasted about a minute with you sincerely giving it your best effort before he had pinned you down and given you a very thorough massaging of his own. Only that one had done the opposite of fixing your back, if anything you'd say he had in fact blown it out.

“That so? You were complaining about it right before they walked in” Gaz said, smug as anything even while Ghost glared over at him.

“He's a lying git luv, obviously just looking to get a gorgeous thing in his lap. My lap, however, is neutral.”

You knew for a fact his lap was not neutral, not one bit. His lap was very much the kind of lap that you found yourself bouncing on anytime he got you alone and charmed you right into it. You could be in the middle of a training exercise, fully in the zone, and next thing you knew you were stuffed full of Kyle bloody Garrick in the middle of a safehouse where anyone could wander in at any moment. It wasn't like you were a big risk taker, but he could make you think anything was a good idea.

“A veritable Switzerland I'm sure.”

“Safest place to be really.”

“Look me in the eye and say that with a straight face then.”

Soap and Ghost groaned in tandem as you made the mistake of looking at Gaz. That bloody sunshine smile could sell ice in the Arctic and as such everyone usually avoided eye contact when they knew he wanted something. Charisma score above 20 that boy. Honestly these fuckers were the worst, but oh Gaz's big brown eyes were just smiling so gently at you and surely he would never do anything untoward. How could you look at this man and think he would ever manipulate you?

“Corporal, come ‘ere, that's an order.”

Gaz's sunshine expression turned to one of wry disbelief. He had been so close, you had been about to take a step towards him. It was awfully unsportsmanlike for Price to pull rank, something Gaz would be holding against him.

“So much for honour.”

“Cheeky fucker.”

“Just taking the piss Captain.”

It wasn't completely unfounded for Price to use his rank to get what he wanted when it came to you, it was why usually the others would try to get you away from him. Ghost did it sometimes too if he wasn't there and the Sergeants were. Although he didn't use it quite as thoroughly as Price did once he got you alone. The Captain was always happy to give you orders if only so he could punish you when you bit back, which you did often. Not because you enjoyed the punishment, that certainly wasn't it. You could not supply another reason, but that was besides the point.

“Well I suppose I have to since you're the Captain, unless there was someone that technically had more authority to give me orders” you said with a grin.

“Come on now pet, don't be like that, just come sit and we can start the meeting hm?” he said, using that voice that was right in the middle of soothing dominance and rough command in a last ditch effort.

“Of course Captain, just want to clear it with command first.”

Price sighed, glancing over and seeing that he had lost the fight when he was met with Kate's sly little smile. She was often your saviour when it came to these men. It helped that her and her lovely wife were both sweet on you. They had invited you round for dinner once or twice, and suffice to say the very delicious home cooked meals were not the only thing getting eaten. If there was one thing the men in the 141 hated more than losing to one another, it was losing to Laswell. She was always so annoyingly smug about being your favourite.

As you settled right down in her lap and both the meeting and Kate's hands gently massaging at your waist started, the 141 collectively thought that next time they'd better bring you a damn chair.

[geothefafa]

i hate when i say smth completely neutral like "fashion and style are literally made up. theres no such thing as Incorrect fashion sense" only for ppl who cant shut the fuck up to say "UUMMM ACTUALLY FASHION IS A SCIENCE AND THERE IS SUCH A THING AS BAD TASTE AND GOOD TASTE AND I HAVE IT AND YOU DONT AND YOU COULD WEAR THIS SHIRT IF YOUR HEAD WAS A DIFFERENT SHAPE AND YOUR EYES WERE A DIFFERENT COLOR AND MAYBE IF YOU PUT EFFORT INTO YOUR APPEARANCE YOU COULD BE PRETTY OR HANDSOME INSTEAD OF THE UGLY PERSON YOU ARE BECAUSE YOU DONT TRY HARDER" like i could punt you off a bridge and not even your god sephora would miss you.

[ishuess]

With the whole chaos going on, I have a few things to say here..(a neutral perspective) This might not reach the involved individuals but here we go:

Fans fighting Fans: Do any of us realise that the fans which are arguing and fighting, their idols or whoever they r a fan of, are if not best friends, friends atleast civil with each other. So why don't we also follow their footsteps.

Digging out past: In their personal clash of opinions, they start dragging the celeb's past. Do they forget that those celebs r also human first and they can make past mistakes when just like us. I'm sure most young people have had some bad relationships that didn't work out, or hook ups or whatever. They are allowed to have personal lives. How would u like if someone dug out ur past relationship or your body count and presented in public with a possibility that three quarter of it is false or lie. If you can't understand the meaning of the term 'privacy' then atleast try to look up the term 'empathy'.

PR to make good impression: The term PR means 'public relations.' More than good reputation, it works as a barrier between personal life and professional life. Nobody announces their personal life in their work space to their boss. In case of celebs, the audience and the fans are the boss. They have every right to have a PR. So if someone shames a fan for believing in PR stories then I'm sorry to tell u but that's the whole point of PR to make believe. And if you know smth personal about the celeb you don't have the right to sell it on internet. Again the reason is privacy and empathy.

Fans becoming offended when their idols are questioned: Saying this from a neutral perspective, every celeb is asked what they do. Each one of them faces trolls. Even Ishan did face trolls and some of them were big celebs themselves but there is a saying, "Actions speak louder than words." Every starkid faces questions like, what does he/she do? and that they r there because of their family but do you ever see Ananya Pandey or Babil or Arjun Kapoor act like they owe explanation. They just work to prove themselves. Then why do 'certain' fans get worked up. Relax and understand this is the social world where these celebs will have to face such things. Trolling is smth each and every celeb faces and if you keep defending ur idol, it's waste of time. I would suggest that wait for the day ur idol shuts them by their work.

Homophobia and clash of opinions: Assuming people's sexuality and degrading others opinion is also very wrong. Yeah ok u think they r straight while the other thinks they r gay. None of you know the actual answer, only the person in question knows that. Then why would u both argue to prove your point. Sometimes it's not even about gender, it's about the person and thier nature that one falls in love with. So you're free to assume ur opinion but not free to degrade other's opinion and make them guilty about it.

Respecting the boundaries of being a fan: there's a nice and simple way of being a fan- appreciate and accept. Just appreciate whoever you're a fan of and accept that some might not like them. And before shaming the other celeb, think once of your idol will like it or not.

So a simple summary of the situation is

-have empathy and respect boundaries of the celebs.

-take jokes and accept that there is no point in fighting.

-enjoy ur time as a fan without ruining others experience.

-past is past and people change and grow upm

That was my general perspective. You're still free to form opinions but please do it respectfully and peacefully. This is not a battleground. I hope some people find this as an eye opener and if not realise their mistakes but atleast read it with an open mind and consider your actions. Wishing you a good day ahead.

[riewritten]

what do you think Erwin considers himself that he sucks at but at the same time he enjoys doing it? suddenly i thought of tiktoks that are like "having a hobby you're bad at is okay". do you have any hobbies you consider yourself not good at too?

tbh i think the "bad" and "good" stuffs are all social constructs, but i'm still struggling with crocheting just bc i think i suck but at the same time i know that's something i do for relax. still sometimes i can't afford to think that way??? do you have the same problem and have you overcome it? i have no idea if this is a prompt or just me asking you stuffs.

do you often project what you're thinking into your writing and visual arts and any other form of art?

oh my god this is getting nowhere 🥲🥲 thank you for reading Rie. have a good day!!!

THE BEST BIRTHDAY

ERWIN SMITH X GEN NEUTRAL!READER

TAGS: fluff, slice of life, kissing, comfort, office romance AU, idiots in love, insecurities, and AAAA HAPPEE BIRTHDAY ERWIN (this also goes with my most recent ask)

WORDS: 2.9k

hi @frenchdyer ❤ i know i took this long bc i've been thinking about this. like the otherworldly self-reflectio i only tend to have once in a year or whenever i'm PMS-ing lol. how's your crocheting? were you able to improve somehow months after you had sent me this msg? my sister gifted me a crochet kit, so i've been planning to learn, too!

on a personal note, the hobby i suck at but enjoy doing nonetheless is drawing! perhaps it's a self-esteem issue, but i've been drawing since i was 5. the passion came to me even before i learned how to write! due to the amount of years i've been trying to master it only to have minimal progress, i can say drawing is smth i can never admit i'm good at. but i came to terms to it now (when i was in highschool i was so insecure about it lol) and bc i did, i draw things to enjoy, not bc i'm utterly pressured to improve!

On the surface, even his closest friends would have a different time answering this question. It's Erwin we're talking about, after all! The literal embodiment of academic perfection and charisma!

Erwin also wants to think of something other than an answer. Although he admits his flaws well when someone points them out, he wants to be good at everything as much as possible. For a perfectionist like him, self-admittance would mean giving up!

It is until you said something that made him recnsider. "Sometimes, I don't see you as a human."

In hindsight, the context of your question was, "What do you want to have for your birthday?" but Erwin seems to be the type to already have the things he'd want and need in life, perhaps if one were to speak materially. Every gift he'd receive would only impact him a little, and you want to change that.

He chuckles at the remark, amused as your features remain serious, "Do I feel like an alien?"

"Dunno," you shrug without turning up at him—only at the papers, hiding a frustrated blush. "And if you're actually a slimy organism underneath? It scares me."

You hear the office chair sliding towards you, and as swift as ever, Erwin's hand is on top of yours. He squeezes it gently, and you try to hold your fluster by glaring at him. Luckily. Only the two of you are in the office; what would the others say if they saw this? You and Erwin made it clear to keep your relationship hidden by acting 'decent' in public places.

He lets you feel its warmth first, although unsure of the reason why, then he guides your hand towards his cheeks. He presses your palm on it. 

"W-what?"

Erwin casually leans his cheek to your palms, albeit with a tranquil expression contrary to you, perhaps amusingly watching your reaction. "Mind repeating what you said earlier?"

"I said underneath. Hypothetically. And I don't mean it literally as well."

"Underneath? Well, that's quite a unique way of asking me to—"

You swatted your hand away and lightly hit his chest as you couldn't hold the fluster. "Stop playing with me. I'm not done yet."

"Well, I'm done."

"Please don't make it my problem."

"I'm actually offering to help."

You perk up in glee. If Erwin's to help, then you might as well consider yourself done. You pulled your chair away from your desk so Erwin could look at it.

However, Erwin asks something completely unrelated amidst the heap of your paperwork. "Why do you not see me as a human?"

"You feel like some sort of god."

"Silly, that's a metaphor that would fit you more."

"Oh, you. Stop flustering me." you huff in sarcasm. "You know about the crocheted scarf I was planning to give you before winter ends?"

"Yeah, and it's summer already. I'm still waiting for it, though."

"I threw it away."

"Huh?" Erwin looks at you in surprise, eyebrows twitched in confusion, perhaps in a whine. He knows you've been trying so hard for it. "Why would you?"

"I'm not good at it."

"But you were enjoying it. You told me so."

"Not because I enjoy it means I'm good at it," you then smile in defeat. "Let's just say I'm not as fast at learning as you are, no matter how much the task interests me. Maybe that's why I sometimes can't deem you human, too. Too good for me, I think."

Erwin could only observe you afterward. You don't try to make it a big issue, none but admittance that unpretentiously comes out of your mouth. As much as it is, perhaps, concerning self-esteem, Erwin is the one hit by it. The way you could admit your flaws a bit too easily and go home without pondering on it is something he couldn't easily do even if he tried. It takes one to help overcome an insecurity and another to admit his own.

"That's not true."

"It is. You really excel at everything, Erwin. That's something I also yearn to have for myself. You don't have flaws. Or, well, let's say you have one, but no normal being can see it so easily."

Well, you were able to lay down his flaws then and there. After all, he's having difficulty coming to terms with his flaws—or perhaps, on saying such admittances out loud. You are right. As much as Erwin demands you to open yourself up to him, some facets stay unsaid because he opts to and wants to remain an ideal image, perhaps one who can only admit his inadequacy if someone points it out. You're the complete opposite, though. You could admit your flaws and still end the day happily. The 'incompatibility', or so you might call it, could be giving him a hard time consoling you.

Oh, and when he recently enjoys consoling you the most. He really appreciates having you open up to him, enjoys the privilege of being able to take care of you as you let him, enjoys listening to your blabbers, and offers resolutions just like the strategic man he is. After all, he's one of the few people who sees that.

Only if he doesn't suck doing it.

"Oh no, did I say something that upset you?" you ask worriedly, sensing his silence.

And he's not the one to be given comfort right now, or so he thinks. It's as if you hit a nail, albeit unaware of how and where it hit him.

Just as if closing the distance is the needed nudge, Erwin pulls your figure towards him, holds both cheeks and surrenders to sweet kisses. Erwin's lips are warm, and the pace is languid. Yet, it's overwhelming enough to deprive you of your senses, let alone the urgent question of why he is suddenly acting the way he is. This might be the first time he got intimate with you inside the workplace. You know this type of kiss from him, too—he does it whenever he's dreary or after working on a significant research paper that got him weary.

The worry reverberates, and thus, you withdraw from the kiss, "Is this because of the scarf? I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have thrown it away. Don't worry, I'll make another one and—hmph!"

He cuts you off for another kiss, harsher this time, perhaps classified as a silent sulk for cutting off the lovely exchange, but no—you're wrong. It's not on you at all. Erwin is frustrated with himself. He holds onto your waist until you're seated on his lap and wraps his hand around your neck to press you further to his chest—hoping it would compensate for the distance you two have due to his inadequacies. To be great in giving you solace is to be vulnerable and imperfect; how could he do that?

He withdraws when both of you need air, albeit begrudgingly, "I'm sorry, Erwin. I know you waited for that scarf."

"No, it's not about that."

"Then what?"

He pretended to ponder for a few seconds, eyes roaming the room to gather his words. He pursed his lips before pointing out, "Don't you think the way you perceive me as a human far beyond you is a flaw I might have? Partners are not supposed to see each other that way."

"I'm merely exaggerating."

"Yes, but still."

"Are you saying you must apologize to me because you're such a perfect being?"

"No, because I'm failing to show you that I'm not."

Oh. 

You finally see where he's coming from. "Are you failing by choice?"

He averts his gaze away, "Yes."

"Then it can really be a flaw," you flash him a sympathetic smile, moving his face so he'd see you in the eyes again, "can you tell me why?"

“I'm not brave enough to show it the way other people do."

"You just did, honey."

"Not because I want to, but because I'm insecure about my inability to console you like a normal partner would. The way you perceive me right now says a lot about our distance. And mind you, doing this isn't even supposed to be this hard."

Both of you stopped. That is by far the most vulnerable thing he had said about himself since you started dating months ago—and it wouldn't even sound vulnerable unless it came out of Erwin's mouth. That's how hard he's been all this time.

He expects you to be annoyed. After all, that might be one of the shallowest reasons he had ever given, too.

But then you smile as if you appreciate him for saying that much—just as if you know it takes a lot for the Erwin Smith to admit something like that, "It's not something you can unlearn overnight. Do not fret."

He lets out a defeated chuckle, "That I know well."

"What's strange is that I'm not your first partner. How come this didn't become a problem with your previous ones?"

"Because people are content to perceive me that way. At some point, I preferred that, too. Honestly—" he leans his head on your shoulder, hands on your waist to keep your balance on his lap, "had it not affected the way I console you, I would prefer things to stay that way."

You pepper him with kisses all over his face, something he accepts as a reward, "Honestly, I would prefer you this way, too. A relationship with a god can be a bit of a struggle, after all."

"Indeed it is. What a struggle I have right now."

You glare at him, "What do you mean by that?"

He shakes his head nothing, hands lurking inside your shirt to feel you more, to shower you with reverence, "Let me finish this now. I miss our bed."

Today is his birthday, and you still need to think of a gift that could be deemed special.

As a last-minute reflection before giving up the gift that has been frustrating you for days, you try to ponder on the previous days since he opened up.

Erwin has become more talkative since then. He's always been chatty towards you since you started the relationship, especially when info dumping. However, this has a stark difference. He's trying too much as if matching an expectation no one but him had set up. Wording it as "forced" would perhaps hurt, but it's not something you could deny, either. Only when afternoon came did you realize how to fix it, with Erwin on a couch and crochet yarns on his lap. He has his phone at the coffee table and the familiar tutor video playing in the background. Eventually he sighs, unties the yarn, and repeats—this time with much precision, and you couldn't help but smile. When Erwin is about to learn something new, he locks himself in his office and spends the whole day studying it alone. Only now did you finally unravel why, and it's apparently part of his mentioned flaw that night.

He might be forcing himself lately, but it's the adjustment that counts.

Erwin perks up in surprise when you sit beside him and hold his hand. You guide his fingers into the correct way of tying the knot. You didn't say anything, and maybe you even tried to act like it's an everyday routine. Erwin pretends to listen and pick up the techniques you're blabbering, but in reality, he's just looking at your face. His lips are flat but twitching as he's trying to hold the urge to steal a kiss. He tries to inhale longer to indulge in the scent of your hair but not too much to call your attention. And as the moment passes, thirty minutes, perhaps because the video's finally done playing in the background, Erwin realizes something.

Just… just what held him back from being like this towards you? This is, in fact, a short step. The bare minimum, even. And even so, it felt genuinely liberating. Indeed, he's been forcing himself to be vulnerable recently, but this is the first time it exuded a positive feeling. 

Your hands gently stop, the instruction's done, and Erwin only realizes when you turn to look him in the eye, "You get it?"

"The what?"

"Huh?"

"Oh," Erwin tries to recall what his blank, sappy head might have digested so far, only to no avail. The only thing coming up in his mind right now is the smell of your shampoo. Perhaps his nerdy brain is trying to guess the unfamiliar flavor mix and earn your praise once his guess is correct. "I—uh—"

"You didn't listen at all."

He smiles, guilty.

You sigh, "I'm quite persistent, you see. We're not eating dinner until we both master this knot."

"Wouldn't this wait? I'm not in the mood anymore."

You shake your head and untie the yarn. But just as you're about to quip at his newfound impatience (and how cute he is trying to get the hang of it like a little kid learning origami), Erwin grasps the tool away from your hands and cups your cheeks.

He first lands a chaste peck on your forehead, then the bridge of your nose, then the tip of it, then the two cheeks, and finally, it deepens when he reaches for your mouth.

And because you are indeed a persistent being, you have no idea how shamelessly grateful Erwin was when you did more than just pull him in. He tried to stop himself, after all, for seconds in case it'd do anything better. Maybe you're not in the mood; perhaps you want to see the side of him not knowing better and learning things together. But when his palm glided on your cheek and your eyes widened in response, the tremor in his nerves overpowered the need to ask. 

Perhaps the tremor was gratitude because here he is, not getting any younger, and yet, this is only his first genuine step to face his vulnerability. 

You kiss him back and wrap your arm around his neck to pull him in, albeit quite sure why he's suddenly kissing you like this.

Unlike the previous one, his kisses are full of gentleness, and not a tinge of frustration can be seen. His hands, although huge and hard, slide inside your shirt so softly to feel your bare skin. You withdraw a bit to ask what might be the matter, but quickly forget the question when you see his face. He's blushing as though it's the first time he has kissed like this. His eyes are pretty lidded, lips a bit open, and you realize that although you had seen this expression before, it was for a very brief moment—not immediately after a chaste kissing session. 

He looks at you, quite disappointed for cutting the kiss short again. He grabs you by the ankle until you're sitting on his lap.

"Did something happen?"

He shakes his head, "Saying it out loud would be sappy."

"If you think I'd forgive you for spacing out while I'm—kyah!"

He starts sucking on your neck, "Shut up and don't ruin the moment."

"The what? Hey, don't mark on it. I'm warning you."

Erwin really wants to explain his thoughts. He's sure you'd be glad if you were to know all of this. Even though he could never perceive this as a significant step beyond, he bet you'd be giggling and jumping once you know.

He looks up and tries to explain but realizes how tired he is holding everything in—it took him decades. Erwin addressed it only after loving someone so ardently that he was willing to give up years-long prideful habits—all to love you more. He is exhausted, and your lips are so soft and so near, offering the sheer comfort he needs. It's parted slightly; if his tongue were to slip inside, it would send him into great bliss. Erwin is exhausted right now; perhaps he’d share his thoughts after this overwhelming, trembling warmth subsides.

For now, he at least tries to give a small context, "This is the best birthday I've ever had."

"Y-you think so?!" What have you done? You've been thinking about it for months! How could it happen without you knowing? "We spent the day indoors. We haven't even done anything special yet."

"You'd get quite full of yourself if you knew."

"You're trying to escape for not listening to my crochet blabbers."

"I don't want to get sappy today. Can't we just continue?"

"Well, uh… I really want to know what I did," you avert your gaze away. "I've been at the edge lately, thinking of ways to make you say you got the best birthday today—with me. Now that you finally say it, however…"

Again, it's as if you hit a nail, albeit unsure where and how you did.

"And there you have it. Your answer."

"Huh?" It took you a while to process that. "Because you're with me?"

He nods, albeit in a teasing manner.

"Eek. The sap shudders me."

"That's why I asked if we could just continue where we left off."

"The crocheting, indeed." you tease, but as you're about to reach the tool again, Erwin carries you up in his arms. He doesn't even need to tell you where he'd bring you. The impatient man would straight up lead you to bed to show what he wants.

Instead of scolding him for cutting the lecture off, you sigh and muffle your head in his neck, "You have to thank god it's your birthday today."

"Oh, yes of course," he kisses the crown of your head. "Thank you, dear."

TAGLIST: sorry for causing inconvenience with your notifs, my dears in taglist TT i wasn't planning to publish this tonight but the birthday request activated my brain neurons and said "what if u unload your WIPS and just publish this thing" so yea. sorry. @frenchdyer @watyousayin @collinnmckinley @aeanya @xiaotopia @cadenza-damour @grimistheangerinmystares @rinamars | STORY SUBSCRIPTION FORM

MORE OF SWEET SUBTLETIES SERIES HERE

[scalproie]

"Why are you mad? Bi-han was always evil"

I think what I'm mad about is the removal of underlying tragedy in his story in mk12. Yes, bi-han was, is, and will always be a villain/an antagonist/the "bad" sub zero to counterpart kuai liang's "good" sub zero/scorpion's tormentor in one way or another/"evil" BUT. previously there was nuance that is missing in his mk12 storyline. Its not a good or bad thing per say, I just lament that bc of that, people wont know even less of that nuance.

In previous timelines, bi-han was what the lin kuei was, he wasnt "evil" on his own, he was just the perfect representation of what his clan was because he was shaped by it. His own ambition wasnt really adressed, if he even had any. He was just a cold professional.

Its even more supported in mk: mythologies, the events happen because he has a job to do, not because he wants to. And when things go south he actually goes and fix his mistakes. He also both kills (hanzo) and spares (sareena) people in this game.

It's also now that I realize BOTH sub zero brothers dont really... start stuff. Things happen to them and they react to it but big events dont really happen because of their actions. They're both pretty passive. (and yes even killing scorpion. It happens bc of the clan rivalry. Not really bc bi-han has personal beef with hanzo)

It's when he's killed and become noob saibot that he becomes fully evil thanks to the corruption of his soul, and the focus on his own ambition is then pushed forward. But that's not an accurate representation of who bi-han was. Here's some confirmation from mk:deception

anyway long story short, in the previous timelines:

Bi-han (alive): neutral

Noob saibot: evil

And outside of mythologies, we have seen very little of neutral bi-han

Now in mk12: bi-han's ambition is THE FIRST THING about his character, its his drive. The lin kuei is also no longer smth he is appart of, HE IS the lin kuei, where he goes the lin kuei follows, and not because of his skills (and that wasnt smth ever implied in mk12) but by birthright, so his path to """evil""" is his own path and not something he was forced into. So in other words, its his own choice, there's not something inherently tragic about his situation from lack of agency like it was before.

And it's not inherently a bad thing like. It works in the story. It's okay if this bi-han is """"""evil"""""" from day 1. Bi-han has to be an antagonistic force (but when put in comparaison to other characters like mileena who's a protagonist and whose defining rivalry with kitana has been erased its mmmmmmh kinda unfair. But im not here for that. Thats my own bias). Before in previous timelines he was part of a small, unrelated to everything else (for the most part) sidestory, he was legit just a guy, but now he is part of a larger interconnected one and we NEED antagonists.

But yeah it's like. Despiste being originally a neutral-aligned character, my man gets an awful rep where this part of him is either unknown or ignored and he gets branded evil without knowing fully why. Plus we havent seen much of "neutral" alive bi-han at all and his relationship with his brother has still never been explored as of late. And now mk12 is going to make it even harder to convince people that bi-han is, while not GOOD or misunderstood or smth like that, not ENTIRELY BAD. He was a victim of circumstances. but now he is the circumstance.

[valiantstarlights]

Your personal trainer Dream is a gift that keeps on giving. And Hob being cutely oblivious and innocent about how Dream wants to break his back like a glowstick (in responsible manner of course). How would Dream react to;

A. Hob working out while wearing the #3 jacket

B. A gymbro, ignoring all survival instincts, and hitting on Hob while he's on the treadmill without Dream around

I love your work lots ❤️ 💕 💖 ♥️ 💜 💗

Thank you for the hearts 🥰 and for making me laugh with responsible back breaking. 😂 I'm glad you like my gym AU. 🙇‍♀️

A. Hob working out (or just being in the Endless Gym) while wearing Dream's 03 letterman jacket

Girl (gender neutral) you know Dream is going to be so smug about this. That's his (future) boyfriend right there, and no one can contest it, because Hob is already wearing his clothes and everyone knows what that means. 😏

He thinks he's super sneaky, and thank goodness Hob is as oblivious as he is, because if he catches wind of it, he'd become even more of a blushing mess, and would try to return Dream's clothes to him because he doesn't want to cause any misunderstandings. And that's the last thing Dream wants.

The staff would definitely start treating Hob differently. Not that they're treating him badly or anything, but they'll start treating him like he's a VIP.

And anyway, he's so sweet and nice and if anyone deserves to be treated like a VIP, it's him.

(IDK if I've mentioned this in the fic yet, but Endless Gym is a ✨️super fancy✨️ gym, and famous people actually go there to work out. The staff are used to treating actual VIPs, but they'll treat Hob like he's a tier above them, maybe just a step below the Endless siblings.)

Hob doesn't know why the staff is suddenly super extra nice to him, but he's happy about it and treats them super extra nicely in return. It's a very wholesome cycle of niceness, and through it all, Dream is so proud of him, internally yelling, 'That's my (future) boyfriend!'

B. A random gymbro hitting on Hob while Dream isn't around

CW: sexual harassment and rapey vibes, but nothing bad actually happens because the gym's staff are amazing and dream is very protective (understatement) of hob 🙏

Now why would Dream be absent? 👀 Meeting Hob is like, the highlight of his week.

Anyway, let's pretend that he's sick or smth and learns about what happened from Lucienne, who always keeps an eye out for potential bullying or sexual harassment cases.

I imagine that Dream would demand to watch the security footage (bc he's insane), so he'll see exactly what happened.

He'll see Hob just minding his own business, running on a treadmill, following the lesson plan even without supervision, just basically being a very good boy for Dream 😏, when this fucknugget man smiles smarmingly at him, hopping on the next treadmill and flirting with him.

Hob just looks confused, but Dream sees him just nod politely and return to his workout. Dream sees the man flirting harder, and Hob just not engaging with any of it, and he eventually leaves when the set time is done.

Dream is breathing fire when he sees the man move to follow Hob to the showers, but thankfully a couple of undercover guards (pretend it's a thing) walk up to the man and very politely tell him to stop it. The man is rude to them, but he doesn't push back and leaves when the guards keep their eye on him and loom menacingly near the showers.

Dream tells Lucienne to commend the two guards and give them a bonus, and focuses on recovering so he could return to work quicker.

When he gets back and sees fucknugget man working out (Hob isn't around because it's a day when he doesn't have a session with Dream), Dream walks up to him and says, "I heard about what happened the other day."

"Yeah," the man grumbles. He looks validated, because oh wow Dream Endless is talking to him. No doubt he'd be on his side. "I was just complimenting someone and some douchebags told me to quit it." He scoffs. "Man wasn't even worth it, to be honest. Just looking for someone to suck my cock, you know how it is, and he looked pathetic enough to want to do it."

Dream inhales, exhales, and smiles like he doesn't want to tear this man's throat out with his teeth.

He is going to ruin this man's life. He has already read through his file when he was still sick, and has contacted one of his private eye connections to investigate the man for anything that would get him in trouble. The bigger the dirt, the more Dream will pay.

"You should be careful," Dream says.

"Ha! Yeah. I'll corner him somewhere quieter next time. Do you think he'll come by later?"

"I mean," Dream says, still neutrally, even if there is a bit of a snarl in his voice, "you should be careful, because everyone has secrets."

(Dream blacklists him on the spot for his words about Hob alone. He then takes his anger out on a punching bag.)

(...He may have destroyed the punching bag.)

(I imagine Dream's private eye connection finds some shady embezzlement stuff on the guy and gets him fired, leaving him next to nothing after his company fired and sued him. The private eye thanks Dream for the tip because the company gave them a reward, but honestly Dream doesn't care about any of that because all he wants is for the man to never bother Hob again.)

[qua-qua-qua]

whats your favorite programming language?

ooh that’s hard mind if i go for a bit of a rant? (also i might use some terms you don’t know you can usually find them by googling “<langauge> <concept>” or smth similar or you can ask me)

tl;dr rust is my favorite

so my first language was javascript(/html/css). and it’s a *horrible* language for tons of reasons (that’s a separate rant). but it’s gotten a bunch of nice features recently and i’ve found myself almost liking it somehow. i’m like half convinced it’s stockholm syndrome but who knows. it’s not really a contender for my favorite per se, but i might be most comfortable in it? it’s certainly my favorite scripting language.

the language with the best syntax imo is swift. i love it bc it feels very well designed and the syntax feels very intuitive and clean coming from javascript (as in it fixes some warts i don’t like about js/many c-family languages). one thing i particularly like (and miss in literally every other language) is the ability to infer the object that a property is being applied to. that’s kinda confusing without an example so basically:

let color: Color // some other stuff color = .green // instead of Color.green

it’s super minor but i love it so much and it’s a shame fewer languages have done something similar. i don’t really have many other thoughts on swift though since i haven’t used it in a while. it gets a bad rep as an “apple language” bc they made it, even though it’s open source, has its own organization, and can run anywhere. but bc of that it doesn’t have an amazing ecosystem for running outside of apple devices, so no one does it. it’s a chicken and egg problem. anyways. i want to use it more to try it but haven’t gotten around to it.

okay haskell i’m not very good at it i learned it recently but i absolutely love the functional style. i miss it in all other languages. especially currying. i love functional programming but i have a hard time when everything is perfectly pure. also monads are super cool and i love finding them in other languages. oh i also miss function composition. a lot. it’s so ridiculously useful. i think i’ll enjoy haskell much much more once i get used to it.

finally, what i would say is generally my favorite: rust. it’s very well designed, and i love the zero-cost abstractions. basically (the rust website explains it much better) they mean that rust is about as fast as c, and much faster than any c i could write (and probably as fast as any c an expert could write). i love having everything be so fast but also not having to worry about a ton of low level details eg memory management. (i can’t write a c program for the life of me without leaking memory, causing undefined behavior, or both 💀). perhaps my favorite part of rust is the ecosystem and tooling. cargo (the package manager and build system) is absolutely wonderful and just works™. like literally always. i have zero problems with dependencies and compiling and running and even cross compiling*. and the ecosystem is equally amazing. there’s a crate for pretty much anything under the sun and they’re all open source!! i love how i can just go and look at the code behind the libraries i use just by clicking on “go to definition” in my IDE. and it’s not uncommon for me to be able to understand it too!! and there we go end of rant rust is fun.

\* with one exception: when the rust code links to c code. which is mostly pretty rare but does happen.

actually i lied about ending the rant. i should probably mention python. not because i like it, but bc you prob know it, or at least of it. i’m neutral on it. i don’t know it very well. i wouldn’t say it’s bad, but it’s also not very good. the biggest thing it has going for it is that almost everyone knows it. and it’s a fine scripting language. i’m just not a huge fan personally. (one of my friends would murder me for saying this lmao they love python).

okay sorry for saying so much but um if you have any questions about any of it feel free to ask!!

[sillyhahasilly]

HC REQQQQQ

cal's date ideas w his girlfriend, or how he would react while being in a fight with her

I will do my best anon 🫡 (also I've used gender neutral language, but I did think of these as him dating a girl.)

dates!!

hate to say it but I don't think cal would be the bestttt at this. he would try, but he would be the type to no show or blow u off to from what u understand to hang w andre (they ARE hanging but also planning mass murder). he would not put u before zd lol.

BUUUTT

I feel like first date would be the movies. prob horror? but if u didn't like horror yall would see smth else, but he would prob be obv abt not liking it much. throughout the relationship he would continue to take u to the movies sometimes, but it's one of those things he is more likely to skip on (esp if it's smth he doesn't like)

u have to remember the mf doesn't drive. I hc him as being unemployed too. you would be picking him and he would be ur passenger princess 💔 he would also do the thing like "ahh shoot. I don't have money on me.. could you??" and you'd be paying. ok enough slander for him in this section.

"I know a spot" and he would take u to the woods but it's nice cause there are "cool rocks" or smth. and it would be nice!!! yall would hang out and talk. cal would have emotionally intimate talks w you, most of it half-truths, but sometimes u would get glimpses into who he really is. (after zd u would think back to some of the shit he said and wish u did more to make sure he was ok.) the stuff u would talk abt would mainly be suicidial ideation. I don't think he would get into homicidal stuff w u, or only under the guard of satire (like saying ugh I want to kill that guy, but u don't actually mean it. cal does.)

yall would smoke weed together all the time. esp at his ik a spots.

you wouldn't go on dates in busy places like theme parks or even museums. there is js so much this man wouldn't do I think. :/

but anyway ur dates mostly consist of going off somewhere by yourselves and chilling.

this depends if u calm hanging at home a date - but yall do that sometimes when cals house isn't busy. if his house is busy w his siblings you guys go to a empty park or woods (in walking distance if u don't drive)

fighting >:(

most of ur fights are abt him being distant or treating u like shit. bc he can rlly treat u like shit sometimes.

when u fight he acts like it's not a big deal, which can make u feel like ur overreacting, and if u voice that he doesn't deny it. not very great.

he doesn't have much of an emotional reaction to ur fights.

doesn't have a problem admitting he is wrong if pressed about it, but he doesn't fix the problem usually.

he tells u to calm down.

he is really good at cheering you up after fights, tho. he can always make u laugh and sometimes is able to change the entire course of the fight by js making u laugh.

he doesn't have a problem saying sorry.

but if u guys leave on a bad note and u decide to stop talking for a bit he will take a awhile to talk to I again if u don't fold first. not cuz of stubbornness he js doesn't do it

[cursezoroark]

OoooOoOooo.....you wanna make an oc x canon ship with Taka sooooo bad.....join meeeeeee/ silly.

But uh. Yeah. Unless Mercury does get hit with sledgehammer I don't. Know if it'll work hgvhvgvgvcg. It's really dependent on what you do with them lol.

- R

SEE ok the thing is. I think Taka does like Mercury romantically. The entire time in the desert as I was playing I was thinking “is he flirting. Is he flirting in a rlly sad way.” And then the train car scene happened and I died. I was charmed. I’m so easily charmed by sad pathetic men. I give him a little kiss. I knew he was getting stabbed later though so rip to him.

But Mercury is like. poison in a bottle that isn’t neutralized yet and they Know they would probably be bad for him. They probably have an idea about it. But they don’t engage w it because 1. They’re in the fucking desert and got electrocuted to hell and back + wow that’s a beheaded person! they need some quiet. And 2. They actually like Taka as a person, and wants them to be on their level. They don’t think they’re good for him in that manner. They like having someone that knows what it’s like to (REDACTED) so. rare scenario where they’re unsure how to approach this.

ah but don’t get me wrong they do find him attractive. But not in the sentimental value (as of me writing this). I don’t know I can’t rlly see Mercury fully going all mushy romance rlly. U have to work rlly hard to charm a charmer. Either have smth severely wrong w u (Flora lmaooo) or be someone painfully earnest. Which Taka is slowly turning to be. But again, Mercury’s a person I slam down who doesn’t “want to be tied down”. Whether or not that changes (and even if it’s w Taka) is up in the air.

[anotherizuwrites]

Friendship Hcs with Atsushi Nakajima & Ranpo Edogawa.

synopsis. have you ever wondered what will it be like if you were the friend of the soft weretiger & the greatest detective of the armed detective agency? maybe close with them? let's see and find out.

possible tw(s). a bit of swearing at ranpo's part, some sad parts here and there during atsushi's part.

character (s) featuring. Atsushi Nakajima, Edogawa Ranpo. (Separately).

masterlists. | Bungou Stray Dogs Masterlist.

- Reader is gender neutral but no pronouns are used.

Atsushi Nakajima.

He's such a good friend to have :]]

Would %1000000 support you on whatever you do and your life choices unless if it's something illegal or bad-

Will try to cheer you up when you're upset, sad, frustrated, & etc. and, ofc, you would do the same for him

If you're older than him, I think he might (would) see you as an older sibling/parental figure or if you're younger, you're the little sibling figure ?? (I have no idea tf I'm doing with my life- 😃👍)

N e ways-

The both of you (mostly him actually) would look out for each other when you're on missions and protect/help each other out when the other is in trouble

You & him would occasionally hang out at a café you always would go to and hang out while talking each other about things you have interest in, things you like, and other stuff when you guys don't have any work to do!

Some people have actually mistaken you two as a couple one or a few times, and it still flusters Atsushi whenever this happens while you were used to it/unfazed-

It's so funny to see Atsushi so flustered like that- lmao-

If you're the teasing type (like Dazai-), then you might've teased him about this just to see his cheeks grow red as a cherry-

Of course, the both of don't have any romantic feelings for each other, you view each other as siblings/family!

If you're taller than him, you probably have carried him a few times before, either on purpose or smth along the lines of that (like you have to carry him cause' he was injured on a mission, the way you carry him is your choice)

You'd pat his head and he might do the same to you

He treasures anything you give him, even if it's a singular plucked flower that's slowly wilting away 'til death, a shiny rock you found, or a keychain that resembles him in some way (example: a tiger keychain, a moon keychain), he'll cherish it forever no matter what it is <3

Atsushi would try to help you in situations if you're seeming to be looking uncomfortable when that person starts hitting on/flirting with you, and he would either try to take care of the situation (by confronting that person and tell them to stop making you uncomfortable) or escort you outta the area/place you're at and if any of the other members of the agency are there, he'll let them know about it and take care of the job

You would help him out by using your ability when going on missions that involve a little violence here and there, protecting him from any harm that's coming your way

You find his tiger form, named Byakko, adorable. You probably give him headpats when you can :]]

He thinks you're kinda intimidating at times, specially during when going against the enemies, since you would have this such sweet and kind expression on your face but the words you were saying to the enemies don't even match the smile you have on-

Since he's such a worry wart most of the time whenever someone gets injured, especially if that person is you, you would try to reassure him everything's going to be fine even if it may not look like it

That one friend who probably makes terrible jokes and being awkward about it and there's always someone who would always laugh at their jokes

Random scent hc : Atsushi smells like vanilla and probably also cinnamon & strawberries joined into the mix

I have no idea why, but he seems like he'll smell like that-

Prone to having nightmares at times, so when he comes to you, may be having tears prickling his eyes, please do comfort him <3

If you were to shower him with platonic affection and compliments, he would get so embarrassed & flustered and start stammering nonsense that you don't even understand the hell's he's saying but you vibe with it- 🤷

Since you spend most of your time spending with him, you might as well spend time with Kyōka too since she hangs out with him mostly

Let's you drag him anywhere you want unless you need to keep track on the mission you're on/get lost along the way

If you're really close with him, he might tell you about his past, like the orphanage he resided in for a while before being kicked out onto the streets with nowhere to go for example and you would comfort him

But all and all, he's a very good & sweet boy to have as a friend though he's a worry wart at times but he means well. 9/10 :]

Ranpo Edogawa.

Kinda chaotic ngl-

This guy likes to be praised alot and it makes you think he probably has a praise kink-

(But of course, we won't get any deeper into that since we're keeping this all sfw and I don't do nsfw at all-)

Back to the main topic; please praise him-

If you do, his ego will go going through the roof-

Besides the president's praises, he mostly craves these compliments from you the most. You always complimented and praised him on his intelligence, skills, his looks, and pretty much everything that he does/have (as it pretty much should be-)

But he really appreciates how you aren't doing it in a way to suck it up to him. You just genuinely mean everything you say positively about him

It's not a secret that he doesn't have an ability like his colleagues but he didn't want any pity from anyone. He doesn't need it, he's one of the most essential members of the armed detective agency. He doesn't doubt himself in the slightest, but though it does something to him knowing that someone has their whole entire faith in him so easily

Even if he doesn't have a flashy, cool, and striking ability like the others, you still encouraged him every time at anywhere you are at

Besides Dazai (and I think also Fukuzawa), you're the very few people who he'll pay attention to for more than five seconds

He's surprisingly soft towards you

If you were to make homemade sweets of any kind (cakes, cupcakes, brownies, lolipops, gummy bears, chocolates, etc.) and give them to him as a gift, he might lose himself-

You're like a parent friend to him cause' you would lightly scold and force him to eat regular, healthy food because eating just sweets and cake is bad for the health of one and a regular human must eat healthy food instead of just eating sweets

Because eating just sWEETS IS NOT HEALTHY FOR YOU AT ALL-

This guy definitely smells entirely like sweets, like,, a strong aroma of sweetness emitts from him which can tell you that it's Ranpo even without looking at him or hearing him at all-

He probably shares some sweets with you, and only you if you're that really close with him

Steals whatever sweets you have but you mostly offer some to him or just give the whole thing (unless if it's a lolipop-)

Has asked you to carry him on your back once cause' his feet were hurting from walking

Even if you may be a very sweet and caring person (beside Atsushi), you tend to call him a 'childish idiot' sometimes and he's pretty dramatic about it

He gets lost so damn easily, and you would become his guide 'dog' whenever you find him and guide him wherever he needs to go, please do not look away from him for one second cause' if you do, the greatest detective might as well just disappear from existence and never be found again by mankind 🤷

Not really though-

He may be childish and annoying at times but you love him /p

He manages to convince (force) you to slack off from work and hang out with him where his desk is, you two talk and talk about whatever (mostly him bragging about the cases he's done before-) and maybe eat some snacks while you're at it

When Fukuzawa walked in on one occasion, he did not even bat an eyes or even talk to you about how you were skipping on doing work in front of his damn eyes-

He only smiled, said a greeting to you both, and went back into his office

"Hey Edogawa-san?"

"Just call me Ranpo."

"Ah, Right. Ranpo, why didn't the president reprimand me for not doing work instead just slacking off?"

"Well, I exempted you from work today by doing all of your work because I was bored."

"Ah, I see. okay- pardon?"

Sometimes, you have to deal with him and his love for candy- meaning that you have to try and prevent him from getting distracted and not going on the mission which you were supposed to do

"Ranpo, please-"

"But [name]!! That shop has that new candy I wanna try!! I've been wanting to try it ever since!"

"oh my gosh- RANPO WE NEED TO COMPLETE THIS FUCKING MISSION FIRST, I PROMISE THAT I'LL BUY YOU THAT CANDY YOU'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO TRY LATER AFTER WE FINISH THIS PLEASE-"

He likes to go to the movies with you, specially murder mysteries type of movies, and then figures out the killer within the first 8 minutes of the movie-

Probably tells you spoilers of some movies you wanted to watch and you would stuff his mouth with a cupcake (or just a sweet of any kind) or just simply slap your hand over his mouth before he could get the words out

Sometimes shares some of his snacks from his sacred snack pile. Everybody in the office was stunned to witness this cause' Ranpo has and will never share his snacks with anyone ever

You might know who Edgar Allan Poe is cause' Ranpo might've mentioned to you about him a few times but you've never met the disastrous ball of anxiety in all your life- (yet-)

He's a great friend but pretty much childish as a first grader. An 8.5/10

© 2023 izu-mikazuki-is-alive. all rights reserved.

[fagsystem]

I have stopped syscoursing so much. But I keep thinking about arguments about neutrality.

'Okay but what if someone was neutral on you being trans?'

That does not work because those who are against people being trans fucking murder us. That is an instance of one side is loving and supportive and the other side Fucking Murders Us.

If you are GOING to compare it to something LGBTQ+, literally aspec discourse is right there. Because that, like syscourse, is discourse about exclusionism.

'Okay but what if someone was neutral on you being aromantic?'

Okay. They can do that. I do not really care that much about them having no opinion on me not experiencing romantic attraction. They do not have to.

'Okay but what if they're neutral on whether or not aspecs are LGBTQ+? If they were friends with people who think aspecs don't belong in the LGBTQ+ community?'

I do not care.

First of all, being neutral does not mean being neutral on people being assholes.

I don't know what it is about discourse that makes you think that those who are not directly in your group think maltreatment of you is fine. I do know, it is in group out group mentalities.

Fun fact, people have morals that exist outside of specific and niche internet discourses. Shocker, I know. People generally think it is bad if others, say, send death threats to or harassment campaigns against others. Yes, even if they are pretty neutral on the debate it comes from.

Like man, I got real issues going on. Someone being neutral on others including or excluding my aromanticism from the LGBTQ+ community is not a real issue. It IS a problem if they are neutral on maltreatment of aspecs, that's shitty, but it's not a discourse thing as much as it is, "Wow, you really think it's okay to treat people like that."

Because yeah I do face bullshit for being aromatic. No, nothing justifies that maltreatment. No, it is not fine that I get treated like that because other minorities face different kinds of bigotry.

But like even the transmed comparsion shit is just. Not a thing you can bring up. Because the minority in question, trans people, cannot access life saving healthcare if the transmeds win and those they do not deam 'trans enough' get excluded from being legally allowed to live as their genders.

Like man I showed up to a t shot appointment in a sports bra and skirt had the realisation that if I lived somewhere else, I would be denied my t shot and probably taken off of t entirely.

Like it's just so baffling to me how you think you can compare these real fucking world problems to internet discourse like this. Sorry but my siblings are dying because of this. And I'm not going to say aphobia isn't a problem because a lot of it is online, like it impacts me and my friends and it's fucking shit. I'm not saying it's not shit. I'm same category of shit that non-cdd plurals face.

You can talk about problems and even compare it to other problems for the sake of communicating your point. Just, yk, if your whole argument rests on comparing it to something that is just so unbelievably fucking different that costs people their lives. Don't. Don't actually do that. There's a really fucking good equivalent for if you NEED to compare it to smth LGBTQ+

[fairycosmos]

sometimes i'm like literally what's stopping me from eating all that and so i do eat it and then i feel bad for a week straight and think that i should starve myself i hate it here

i feel you entirely omg obviously this is a serious issue w probably a bunch of underlying causes that i hope you're able to access some professional support for but speaking from my experience with it like......ok so the first step was recognising the cycle obviously you can do that already and i just kinda did that for years......and then i slowly worked on kind of intercepting those thoughts before they had the chance to grow into a reality like when i thought whats stopping me from eating all that i wouldn't answer myself with something to do about my body or the way i look i would just very honestly be like bc im going to feel really fucking sick and then starve myself for a week to make up for it.....when i had the thought that i need to starve because i binged, i forced myself to eat a normal meal at a normal time despite feeling guilty or full or gross or whatever because it was literally the only way way regulate my physical and mental hunger cues again........i know it's not this simple and honestly it has taken me a lot of fucking work to get to the point where i can do this even 40% of the time. but when i am able to it, when i am able to nourish and feed myself until i feel satisfied on a regular, normal basis - it does work. it does break the horrific fucking nightmare of a pattern. whether it's identifying that you do need to eat or that actually right now you're full and don't - working on seeing both of those feelings as neutral is a good step in the right direction. but i really hope you're able to reach out to your doctor or a hotline or even some online resources to give you the tools to deal with these emotions and thoughts in a healthier way. no matter how much you feel like you can't stand yourself - the cycle doesn't break until you do at least one little thing differently, and i promise you deserve that peace. smth that kinda helped me is trying my very best to practice body neutrality and listening to my stomach as an organ not as like a ......bodily feature. much love. X

[cavernfullofexistentialdread]

Hey anyone remember that show Bunk’D from the early 2010’s or smth?

Well is it just me or did Tiffany and Zuri weirdly have an amazing dynamic?

Like- you don’t have to ship them but their dynamic is…. Actually kinda fun???

I mean the only reason Tiffany isn’t cooped up studying is because of Zuri. She lives a little because she introduces her to candy and video games (even if they do end up being problematic). Zuri is what introduced her to letting go. Not to mention she also is deeply concerned for her. Tiffany is lawful neutral and Zuri is the one to bring her to the chaotic side.

Zuri only sees the error of her ways through consequence. But Tiffany is always there to drag her back to the “what now?” Zone. She the morally good smarts to Zuri’s morally grey smarts. Not to mention she’s a sarcastic dramatic kid with a chaotic and greedy way of thinking. The fact that she most often paired with the girl that has a solid way of doing things compared to her acid liquid is genius.

It’s literally just the “Lawful Good and Chaotic Evil” dynamic! They bring out the little bits of chaos and order out of eachother. And it’s amazing to watch

I WANT A SERIES JUST ABOUT THEM

I AM ETERNALLY PISSED THAT THEY REPLACED HER WITH DESTINY. I mean yes they have every right to do it and I can understand WHY they would do it.

maybe Tiffany’s actor quit her contract

maybe Tiffany as a character could go no where and they were satisfied with what they had set up

maybe they couldn’t have a character like Tiffany replace her because it would be too similar and repetitive

BUT THE FACT

THAT THEY COULD HAVE DONE SOMETHING ELSE WITH DESTINY’S CHARACTER THAT WAS DIFFERENT FROM TIFFANY’S BUT STILL AS GOOD

DIDNT HAPPEN?

IM ETERNALLY PISSED ABOUT IT

But anyways

thank you for coming to my TEDtalk, you prob have no idea what Bunk’D is. It’s really bad laugh track yes but it has its moments. I recommend you check it out. It’s an extension of the series “Jessie” and you can find it on Netflix