#and if i did.. I couldn't adjust lol
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edited some lingerie options for blades f!mcs for @bladesrc
(not my mcs!)
#actually orc mc should have a pair of shorts imo but i didn't get any sprite of it without the bulge#and if i did.. I couldn't adjust lol#playchoices#blades of light and shadow#blades mc#bladesrc#bladesredesignchallenge#t edit tag#choices edits#btw this is a fun challenge 🙌🏽
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edens!
requested from @emissary-of-dog
#pokemon rejuvenation#pokemon desolation#art#i know the request was most likely just rejuv eden but i figured both wouldn't hurt! if thats ok. if it does hurt ill adjust the post lmk#i feel like its obv here but the ref for eden rejuv here is the etto... bleh! meme. i couldn't think of anything else.#eden rejuv was hard to nail down in terms of personality. the only real ref i could rlly conjur was zumi's ych auction i found while search#searching for refs. it was kinda funny. the fingerless gloves are just a hc of mine. i think being able control emotions is awesome.#to control vulnerability is to be vulnerable themselves (not. lol) so i thought the hc could have a lil weight.#also i did notice that all of the androids notably have gloves on. in different manners. thats fun.#eden deso is here! i forgot her name until i had to remember who eden was in the rebornverse games and she popped up#and then i thought initially the requester meant her till i realized. oh. its probably rejuv.#i thought it would be fun! i hope i did her justice. she's with garrett here :]#funny enough these characters are both currently out of the narrative but carry a pretty notable role. i thought that was funny.#hauled myself to color these cause i badly need to practice that.
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Anat Inbal
#Tav#bg3#baldur's gate 3#baldur's gate iii#gale of waterdeep#gale dekarios#I included a 'human au' pic with more natural coloring for comparison#I fucked up my first run super hard lmao so when I decided to start over I did some design adjustments#I had a ton of glitches with the marid skin and couldn't get the lips the color I wanted#So adjusted to try and keep the vibe of ocean + wet sand + stars#Eldritch horrors from the depths of the sea and also space lol
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#bro why is everyone growing up and away and trying to figure out their lives and careers and loves#and im just sitting here missing them?#like sure im trying to figure out mine too we're all that age so I don't resent them for it#but why don't they miss me? why don't they feel empty when they haven't talked to me in a long time?#like. didn't they feel very light and happy after talking to me like i did with them don't they have a bad day and think that oh ill#talk to me and it will all feel okay even if it isn't just for a minute?#oh ny god i feel so pathetic asking this but like why am i suddenly crying now???#like my bestf. she's so busy in her new internship in mumbai that she can't be bothered to text me back#a simple yes no question for days. like i understand you have cool new office and work and friends and your stupid fucking ex#that you couldn't stop crying about to me living in that city with you but what about me? what about us?? what about you saying#that you're my first bestfriend i haven't told this to anyone else this is forever everyone else judges me but you're the best#like i just feel like if you're going to leave me then don't fucking say shit like that to me??#okay oh my god this is so irrational but i literally can't stop crying and it's definitely pms like i checked#she's not even leaving she's just suddenly busy and adjusting it's only been like a month#but i hate this stupid fucking knife like fear that as soon as someone is a little busy or seems like they're pulling away a little my#brain is like okay they hate me they're going to leave me so pack your bags we're leaving first#like i know a better solution would be to just tell her that hey dude i fucking miss you and i saw this show and remember how you used to#love peter kavinsky because he was adorable and i want to sit and watch it with you and just why aren't we back in school#where we are basically forced to hang out for like 7 hours because im so sick of only seeing you like once in 2 months for a few hours#like i know it's not your fault and we're just growing up and in different directions but just please like five more minutes can you stay#i don't even have the confidence to say anything to her lol she's my only friend like if even she gets mad and leaves#but i know that's not how healthy relationships work. and ugh my sister is so fucking far away i can feel it everyday#in the 5 and a half hour time difference. i hate this i hate everyone everyone has to go so far away#i hate living in this empty fucking house and being responsible for my own emotions fuck this isse accha toh living with dad hi hai#atleast when im there there are only 2 emotions anxiety and boredom. now i have a whole house to myself to cry whenever I need#for however long i need in a locked room. really looking forward to adulting haha i can see just see myself succeeding so well🙄#man this is crazy im gonna go do jumping jacks or something so this comes and goes faster#umm#dni
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my therapist is so concerned for me jdhdjf im such a special boy
#i'm literally fine except for the bit where i'm doing so awfully anyway lol#i'm so well adjusted and mindful and for what#at one point they were like 'now i'm not saying you have DID or anything but if we just look at this like there's a dissociated part of you#asking for help' etc etc and then i couldn't focus on the next 5 minutes bc i was thinking about siffrin <3#silverstarschat
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youtube
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No one asked or wanted this but here's voice samples of Seiji's and Hazuki's old and new VA's if anyone was curious!
#I couldn't get a directed comparison of lines with Hazuki like with Seiji but the intent comes across I think#hey if we ever get NG dlc like death mark did we should adjust to the new voices lol#spirit hunter ng#Youtube
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decided to draw it out. seemed fitting for halloween hehe pls forgive me for any inaccuracies, i've never done a Bayonetta before Timmy seems to be pleased with the result 😉
"Who else? Tifa Lockhart?"
"Tootie, have mercy, please..."
Got hit with nostalgia and drew my old blorbos lol. In which Timmy has a silly Teenage Boy moment™. This was so fun to draw, especially the expressions hehe~
Please do not repost
#self reblog#it's still halloween where i am; so it counts!#my old blorbos. my cutiepies#and i did adjust some parts of the costume because my babies don't need to be doing all that at this age thank you#other parts were because omfg too many details and i couldn't find many good references 😭#babbles in the tags lol
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don't let them hear — choi subong
synopsis: lights off meant something a little different between you and the famous choi subong, also known as thanos.
genre: smut and fluff bc theyre js exes who want eo bad LOL. green flag choi subong... say WHAT 💜
warnings: afab reader, tease, fingering, nothing else honestly
author's note: this is the first time i have ever written on this account + since my social media detox so pls bear w me if this isnt exactly up to your standards ha ha ha... ily anyway not proofread! i wrote this when it was 3am leave me be.
"lights will be turned off in ten seconds."
in a moment, the lights will dim and the only thing shedding light in the room would be the giant pig dangling from the ceiling and choi subong's pale skin that's attached to yours. ever since he told you he would be joining you in bed tonight, you couldn't deny the fact you were thrilled. your drug-addict ex boyfriend shouldn't have excited you this much. let alone the fact you were waiting for him.
"five, four, three, two, one." now, it was fully dark.
you sighed in disappointment. you turned away from the side subong was and decided to sleep on your own. you knew you shouldn't have trusted him at all, yet you were gullible enough to believe he'd keep his promise. and he didn't. cause if he did, he would be beside you with his arms wrapped around your waist pulling you closer to him so that you could warm one another up.
"y/n?," your eyes abruptly opened, "are you still awake?" he actually did it. he actually kept his promise.
he actually came.
you decided to play the stubborn game and not answer. but you knew that he was aware you were definitely up. "don't want me here? okay señorita. i'll leave." his footsteps began to get quieter as he 'left'. you felt guilty and decided to let him explain himself. after all, it hasn't been long since that robot woman announced it was time for bed.
"fuck you." you turned toward him, expecting him to be halfway gone already. yet you met a choi subong sitting down with his arms trapping his knees while replicating footsteps that were leaving. "wow. double fuck you.'
"please, i know you want me here. so move over." he stood up and laid down beside you as his head automatically dug itself into your chest. "i don't give a fuck if you're going to go on some lecture about how i should have been here sooner, so don't waste your time." he pecked your collarbone before adjusting his position. "i'm here with you and that's what matters. okay?"
speechless is an understatement. you couldn't even be mad. you couldn't feel the slightest anger in you because he's right there. you could see his purple hair laying on your neck.
wait. something's wrong. something's missing.
"wait. choi subong. where's the necklace?" you used two fingers to tilt his head up so you could see his eyes. they're still as pretty as ever. fuck him for having such charming eyes.
"gone. i threw it away when i saw you rave about how you were so much happier when you quit." he stared at you. waiting for you to say something. "what? do you want me to dig my hands into the toilet to retrieve it?"
"did you seriously… get rid of it? for me?" you sat up. tucking a strand of hair behind your ear before holding his hands. you noticed the tattoo he dedicated to you. the little heart with a sun next to it because he said that you were his ray of sunshine.
"of course i did. i meant it when i told you i'd fix myself as long as we crossed paths again, you know. i don't just make promises for the sake of—" shutting him up with your lips was probably your favourite thing to do. you missed this. you missed him. you missed feeling his lips perfectly match yours everytime you leaned in to him.
"then i meant it when i told you i'd let you fuck me whenever, wherever. hopefully you take that damn opportunity now." he analysed your face before realising you were serious. he didn't even need to say anything. he just held your face by your jaw, kissing you rougher than earlier while gently laying you down on your bed.
he took off your pants and placed it just beside the bed, sliding your panties right after it. "fuck. how long have you been this wet, hm?" his middle finger glided itself from your cunt to your clit, using your slick as lubricant to teasingly insert his finger in your hole. "was it when i told you i quit? or when you kissed me? or better yet, since you saw me?"
"fuck, subong–" his free hand covered your mouth, preventing you from letting a noise out.
"can you be quiet for me, baby? wouldn't want to let these jackasses know i'm fucking the prettiest girl here, would you?" you shook your head, agreeing that you should be dead silent.
you didn't even notice that he snuck a second finger, fucking you with his fingers repeatedly until your were squirming and arching your back from the bed. "that's it, baby. do just that." his thumb flicked your clit, causing you to buck your hips on his hand.
you don't know how he understood, but you mumbled against his hand that you were going to cum. his smirk was evident in the dark room which caused you to be pushed to the edge even more. "are you going to cum? hmm? is my baby finally going to cum for the love of her life?"
all you could do was nod. it was cute to him.
when you finally reached your release, he made sure to lick off all of your juice from his fingers. you watched him slowly suck on his ring finger while intensely staring at you. "i love you. don't leave ever again. i better be the only one you do this to."
"only for you, baby. just you and me. choi subong and future choi y/n. okay?
#🍀 cali’s works . . .#💬 bigbang . . .#bigbang smut#choi seunghyun smut#thanos smut#choi subong smut#choi seunghyun#choi subong#squid game#seunghyun x reader#t.o.p x reader#top x reader#thanos x reader#squid game thanos#squid game s2#player 230
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— big boy ! | k.mg
⋆ pairings; mingyu x fem! reader ⋆ genre; smut ⋆ w.c; 1.2k+ ⋆ warnings; dom! reader, sub! mingyu, jealousy, slight toxicity from both of them, possessiveness, oral (f. receiving), reader is mentioned to be smaller than mingyu, size kink, reverse size kink, mingyu is a slut ⋆ a/n; yes, and is this reverse (?) size kink. no clue lol
now, this goes two ways...
either him getting so turned on by the size difference. his cock twitching in need when he sees how deep his huge cock would be buried in your cunt. and, him casually using his strength to pick you up and continue rutting his hips into you. or,
mingyu's breath hitches with each step you take towards him, and he swallows thickly, having been cornered. he looks down at you, getting lost in your lust-swollen eyes.
his cock twitches inside his pants when you press your body against his. you’re comparatively smaller than him, but you have so much fucking power over him. so much that he forgets this is a company party, and he could probably get fired if someone caught you both in the restroom like this.
“had fun? hmm?” you poke your cheek with your tongue, progressively getting annoyed as he continues to stay silent.
“of course, you did. I mean all those girls were practically throwing themselves at you. liked the attention?”
you can only adjust for so long. and, you couldn't care less if someone would label you as toxic. ever since he stepped in, his so-called coworkers had been flirting with and touching him. you were right there beside him. if it's this bad with you around, how bad is it without you?
your blood boils, and your dress feels too tight, rendering you breathless. your patience runs thin with every passing second. but to mingyu, this whole situation is hot.
who knew you were this possessive? and that fucking dress hugging your body isn't doing him any good. his back presses against the cold tile of the basin, and you place your hands on either side of his body, looking up at him.
he could easily overpower you, pin you to the wall, and have his way with you. but he can't even move his fingers for the life of him, and there's a voice inside his head, screaming at him to submit to you.
and he does. you pull him down by grabbing his collars and trace his jaw with your nose. the faint flowery perfume you don't use taints his scent, and your nose scrunches up in distaste.
“tch,”
you roughly pull yourself away from him. mingyu whines at the loss of contact, his hands itching to grab your waist. but you stop him by pinning his hands together at the front.
a pout forms on his pretty lips, and he stares at you with wide “innocent” eyes. if you lacked some self-control, you would've roughly kissed him and fucked him for everyone else to hear.
pressing a small kiss to his lips, you roughly grab his hard cock. his hip bucks into your hand, dick twitching beneath the layer of clothes. whines echo in the restroom, but you shoot him a warning glare, and he promptly shuts up.
after a few gropes and squeezes, you remove your hand, satisfied with how riled up he is now. he doesn't move but simply whimpers and whines. again, he knows he can overpower you. but there's a difference between knowing and wanting. mingyu wants you to ruin him.
“ugh, i want to fuck you so bad.” he whimpers, pulling you flush against him. with a roll to your eyes, you pull away from him and sit on the sink tile.
mingyu doesn't need to be told twice when you spread your legs, inviting him. he kneels on the floor and bunches up your skirt to your waist. his hands rest on the side of your thighs, squeezing the flesh.
a curse falls from his lips, observing the wet patch on your panty. you sigh and relax as he kisses your cunt through the cotton material. carding your finger through his hair, you tug on it, promptly receiving a groan from him.
he removes the cloth, and you shiver as the cold air licks your sensitive skin. he pockets the panty and quickly nestles himself between your legs again.
he leans forward, wrapping your clit between his soft lips. he sucks on the bundle of nerves, tongue flicking at the bud softly. then, he lays his tongue flat against your cunt, licking up your arousal. he hums, savoring the taste of you in his mouth.
you try your best to control all the filthy noises you want to let out. just the sound of mingyu's mouth on your cunt is enough to drive you insane and breathless. wet noises fill the restroom, along with your muffled moans and sighs.
he slurps and sucks on your hole, tongue prodding inside now and then. his soft lips molds with your pussy, and his hair tickles your inner thigh. he whines against your cunt, whispering praises in between.
you close your legs around his head and tangle your fingers with his locks, pushing him further. his nose brushing against your clit sends shivers down your spine, and you struggle to contain your moans. your hips buck up into his face, and you lock your legs around his face.
he doesn't stop despite the lack of oxygen. he slurps and sucks on your hole like a starved man. you can imagine his boner pressing against the fabric of his boxers and slacks. his twitching cock, leaking with precum, is painfully restricted, but mingyu doesn't do anything about it. he neglects himself to please you.
and he doesn't even mind being denied orgasms. as much as you'd like to ruin him tonight, you won't. payback for flirting with all those girls right in front of you. (you know he intended to make you jealous… and well, two can play the game.)
you gasp for breath as the warmth pools in your stomach. mingyu senses the shift in your breathing and laps his tongue on your cunt faster. an unbridled moan escapes your lips as he pushes you off your edge.
you cum on his tongue, still holding his head in place with your thighs. your legs tremble as you loosen your lock around him. he pulls back, gasping for breath and looking dazed.
you think he looks prettier like this, kneeling between your thighs with sweat glistening on his face and lips coated with your arousal. a little out of breath and his eyes practically begging you to fuck him.
but you won't.
your breathing turns even after a few minutes, and you slip off the sink. mingyu follows you and stands up from the floor. you fix your dress and makeup while mingyu watches, dumbfoundedly.
his cock presses painfully against his slacks. you're tempted to take him into your mouth, but you resist it. you don't even offer him a glance as you refix your makeup.
mingyu doesn't protest. he stands with a painful erection, watching you get dolled up again. he doesn't try to touch himself and get you to touch him. he waits. though his eyes scream a different story, he contains himself.
you cast him a smile when you're done, and he mirrors it. he leans down, slotting his lips against yours, and whispers a praise. he melts into the kiss. into you. though he's the taller, bigger one, you never fail to make him feel so small. not in a bad way. in a good way. in this way, mingyu isn't afraid to be himself with you.
yes, even as you are actively denying him any sort of pleasure.
you strut away from him, towards the party. and he follows suit, happily (and with a painful boner). he trembles with excitement, knowing what's about to unfold when you both reach home.
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Bruh. Self... Analyzing and reflecting on past relationships is.... Rough
#miranda talking shit#I mean i can see what i did wrong easily i have since early after but... Only recently really thought#Hard about the other party... And im like.... Oh thats.... There was quite a bit huh :')#I mean i hate talking ill of others and i know no one ever does something to me on purpose but man....#My ex's insecurities really ... Have effected me a lot lol. Not like she was the only one who have made me feel some of the things#I felt. But it was worse bc it was... Her... My partner... Ya know? And now im like ah... That... Yeah#I never thought about how probably jealous she was? Of my bestfriend. She have done many small comments#About how much i talked about her and how much time i spent with her etc... I wasnt out partying or anything such for me i just spent time#With my best friend. And i remember how my ex had said at one point something like 'you really spend a lot of time with her'#I mean... I did. She was my bestfriend? But not until recently i think my ex was probably jealous... And its... I tried to adjust to her?#Like at the time i didnt see i did. But i did distance myself after she said such things bc i felt like i needed to appease her?#Meanwhile i mean. She was out at more social gatherings and parties. I cant remember me saying much else than#Have fun and be safe! Whenever she went. I was never worried that she would get with someone else or something?#I.... Trusted her in that way. I never saw that as an problem. But now i see she uh...probably didnt trust me in that way?#I cant say she was jealous like actually thought i was being unfaithful or something. But like yeah.#A lot of things werent great in our relationship but that thing i think impacted me the most. Bc it made me feel i was being...#Idk if i didnt give all my time to her she couldn't believe in me or feel safe with me? Yeah something like that#I mean i felt envy in the form of 'i wish i could spend time with her irl like others' so rather 'god wish that was me' but i never thought#Her being out with others and having fun was... Bad. I never sat and imagined things happening. I just hoped she had fun and that she was#Safe. I have my own insecurities. Had way more back then but for me it was not... I couldn't trust her to be faithful?#Or that i felt uneasy that she wasnt spending time with me... But i think that she felt that way and its... Sad. Not that she was controlin#Or super bad but like... She could make comments that were hinting at me talking or spending too much time with my bestfriend#I mean she did indirectly also pressure me in the intimate department by saying things that made me feel guilty#Glad i didn't just 'give in' in the end just bc she wanted to. That would be on brand for me but no i didnt#She made me realize how much trust is important to me. In intimate matters and overall. I probably didn't feel like she trusted me like i
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lover — joe burrow
summary — joe’s only clingy when you’re around
warnings — fem!reader, so much sweetness you’ll get a cavity, joe being clingy, not proofread + rushed writing lol
tags — @wickedfun9 @starsinthesky5 @blairsworld22 @softburrow @joeyfranchise @willowsnook @iosivb9 @ebsmind @joeburrowshaircurl (comment/send an ask if you wanna be added!)
note — whipped this up in like two hours because we need some fluff in this tag. it’s getting absolutely ridiculous. mind y’all’s business. ANYWAYS enjoy!
JOE LOVED WHENEVER you worked from home. It meant that you were there when he left, and there when he came back. Joe wasn't the type of person — or boyfriend for that matter — to tell you you couldn't work. But whenever you worked from home, it was like a little treat for him.
The two of you were sat on the couch, friends softly playing on the tv in the background. Joe sat next to you, iPad in hand, reviewing film. He wore a loose t-shirt and sweats, funky spongebob socks adorning his feet. He was snuggled right up next to you, his shoulder squished against yours. He was leaning on you, and of course you didn't mind, not until he started to push you over.
“Babe, you're pushing me over,” you giggled, shoving him back a little with your shoulder.
“No, I’m not,” he argued with a pout, letting up anyways. You rolled your eyes, returning your attention to your laptop screen. You sent a few emails, while also replying to a few. It wasn't long before Joe had his body weight against you again.
“Joey, baby, I can't use my arm when you're putting all 200 pounds against it,” you laughed, and he only shrugged. That was Joe’s plan; he wanted you all to himself.
“Maybe that's the plan,” he gave you a cheesy grin, making you give him a look.
“You are such a distraction,”
“Oh I can be a distraction,” he wiggled his eyebrows at you. You knew what he meant even without the wiggling of the eyebrows. Even though you were working from home, you still had work to do. You couldn't just go wherever whenever. That part Joe didn't seem to understand, or maybe he did, he just liked being annoying.
“I’m well aware,” you agreed. Some other things were done, and the warmth of the atmosphere covering you like a blanket. Joe adjusted, laying his back against your shoulder, spreading his legs across the length of the couch.
“You're annoying, you know that?”
“You love me,” he smugly replied, his eyes trained on his film. He usually watched it on his laptop in the seclusion of his office, but today was one of those days. He clung to you like velcro, never wanting to leave your side. It wasn't every day that he was like velcro, but Joe found peace in your presence. You weren't always demanding something of him, applying pressure to him, or criticizing his every move. You provided a safe space for him, and he never wanted to leave it.
“Yes, yes I do,” you hummed, kissing the top of his head. Your hand left your laptop, snaking over Joe’s shoulder and landing on his chest. You patted his chest, running your hand up and down. Your hand went up to his face, grabbing his chin and wiggling his head around. You smirked, wiping your hand all over his face, causing a giggle to erupt out of Joe.
“What’re you doing?” he asked, moving your hand from his face back to his chest.
“Two can play at being annoying,” you hummed, kissing the top of his head again. You caught a whiff of his shampoo, well, your shampoo.
“You're using my shampoo,” you stated, causing Joe to flip around and face you. He flipped his bottom lip and shrugged.
“It smells better than mine,” he argued, placing his iPad on the coffee table. He rested his head on your shoulder, wrapping his arms around your middle. No one ever saw him this way. No one ever saw the soft side of Joe Burrow. They always saw the cool, hard exterior. The man who is always ready to destroy. Joe-cool. He let that wall down around you, showing his soft and clingy side. If his friends ever saw him like this, he would never hear the end of it.
“Of course it does,” you laughed. Your arm wrapped around Joe, running up and down his arm. Your nails grazed his tan skin, sending warm prickles down his body. You still read something for work, but your hand absently moved across Joe’s body. Up his arm, to his hair, down his neck. There was nothing sexual about it, and he didn't feel that vibe, he just melted further into you and squeezed you a little tighter.
His face was buried into the sleeve of your sweatshirt, his eyes watching you work. He watched the computer screen, how you read articles and emails, responded to said emails, set up events. He watched you work, keeping in your element.
“What’re you doing?” He asked, his words muffled by the fabric of your sweatshirt.
“I’m setting up an event for some of the higher-ups. They wanted me to make sure they had the things they needed,” you explained, peering down at him. He looked so cozy, his hair soft and clean, his body completely relaxed against yours. He looked comfortable and at peace, which were feelings that were hard to come by nowadays.
“But you're not a secretary,”
“No, but they're still my bosses,” you reminded him, only to earn a slight eye roll from him. He watched you until the clock ran to 5, which marked the end of your workday. Joe was the one who closed your laptop, making you laugh.
“Impatient, are we?” you laughed, making Joe smile up at you and shrug.
“Your laptop gets more attention than I do,” he mumbled, making you laugh.
“Guess I should make it up then, huh,” you hummed in his ear, which made him sit up and look at you with anticipation.
“Yes, yes you should,” he smiled and he immediately kissed you, hard and fast, making you smile. Threading your hands through his hair, you moved your lips effortlessly against his. He pulled away, resting his forehead against yours.
“Very eager, I see,” you teased, making Joe blush and attack your neck with kisses. You giggled, kicking your feet as you attempted to thwart his tickling. You loved working from home, and Joe loved it too.
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Finally decided to play around with my old lineless style again! Also figured out a way to draw Reimu that I actually really like!
Artist's Notes;
I've mentioned in a few earlier posts that I've been wanting to draw in my lineless style again for a while as a way to test what I've learnt from my previous style in regards to lighting. I did the face first and then for a while was thinking about doing a full body illustration of Reimu just to draw her outfit again. I'll talk about the face first since that's the first drawing I did in this batch.
For the longest time I really couldn't find a way to translate Reimu's face into my style. I was able to make her clothes work out well, just not really her face. I did like elements of how I drew her face a few other times, namely the tiny eyebrows and her pupils, but they didn't really feel like Reimu to me, or at least how I imagined her in my head. I then realized that it was less of a problem with the entire face and moreso the eyes, and it took me quite a bit of trial and error to make something that I was happy with. Also, as much as I thought the tiny eyebrows were cute, it didn't really make sense with her character. Like, from what I know about Japanese history, plucking your eyebrows was something that nobles (rich people) would do, and since Reimu is...neither of those things, I decided to just give her some thicker eyebrows instead (I will be saving the plucked eyebrows for another character though, so they will return). After I got to a face I was happy with, my next challenge was the hair. I did the front part first and liked that enough to continue, and then after more trial and error I realized that deep down I was a short-hair-Reimu-is-best-Reimu-truther this whole time because once I gave up on the long hair and gave her shorter hair something just clicked in my brain. And so, after drawing her outfit in again (this time without the yellow tie which is kinda sad but I'll find a way to incorperate it into future designs because it just was not making sense to me in context with the rest of the outfit) and finnicking around with the bow, I came to a version of Reimu's face that I actually liked. I thought that it made more sense for her character to have her cut it short, mainly because she's doing a bunch of Youkai extermination and she has to keep her hair out of her face somehow. I still wanted to make it kinda messy though, as Reimu is probably too lazy to clean it up herself. I think another reason I like it so much is because in Forbidden Scrollery, Moe Harukawa gave Reimu short hair and that really suited her, so I guess that was just a subconcious reason as to why I liked it so much. I also think that the shorter hair helps to separate her a lot from Marisa, as I think Marisa looks really good with longer hair. Speaking of, now I wanna do a drawing of her and Reimu together to really solidify how I draw them (unlike the previous version where it was just them standing). As much as I do like the face, I am concerned if she looks too much like how I drew Keiki now, but that might just be a product of the stylistic choices I made with her eyes and I might just be overthinking it. I am hyperaware of same face syndrome so that's probably the reason I'm so concerned about it lol.
Now for the fully body drawing. I was struggling to think of a good pose for her, so I just took a picture of myself and used that as a reference while still making slight adjustments for readability's sake. This is another case of, "I've looked at this too long and can spot every single issue with it" but this time I'm still happy with the final product mainly because this was a test drive for how I want to develop my lineless style in the future and for what it is I am more than pleased with the result. The main reason I deviated away from my lineless style was mainly because I was having a hard time with the lighting and making it interesting, and I am so glad that I've finally found a way to make it work! I'm especially happy with the clothes, as I think clothing folds are really fun to draw. I was somewhat inspired by the works of J.C. Lyendecker and the way he draws clothes, though admittedly it is not a one to one, since I mainly wanted to try implying the shading of the clothing folds with shapes (I do really want to do a study of his style one day as his art is incredible). So for the sleeves, I drew in a bunch of triangles where I wanted there to be a strong highlight, roughly coloured in the inside, and then blended them all so it looks like a more subtle. On both of these drawings, I also added in a noise filter to give it some texture (as that's what I used to often do with my drawings) and while I do like it, I might want to experiment with making it more subtle in the future, as it's pretty noticeable in both these drawings. Overall, I'm really happy with the lighting and colours of this drawing, and while I could nitpick several aspects of it (her hand holding the gohei looks too tense, I tried making her look like she was standing on the balls of her feet but the positioning of her Gohei's trail of papers ends up making it look weird, and I could've put more effort into the hair and bow and so many more things), this is more of a piece for me to experiment with my style again, and I'm excited for when I get a new idea for a piece, as I really wanna try some more stuff out with this style!
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𝕤𝕥𝕠𝕠𝕕 𝕦𝕡 - post!d&w!logan howlett x reader
complete masterlist | logan howlett - coming soon!
words || 𝟚.𝟡𝕜
summary || in which the reader gets stood up, and logan consoles her - in more than one way
a/n || self indulgent :)) guess what happened to me guys !!
➵ i know i've been literally dead but i may be back! not sure fully yet lol but i've missed writing. shocker, college is in fact hard and i've spent a whileeee adjusting. that also means my writing is prob a bit shit here but i just wanted to get this out
➵ first time writing logan - i watched deadpool & wolverine and oh my godddd this man can fucking get it. haven't watched the x-men movies so i kinda had to guess his accent, sorry if it's inconsistent. this is set after the events of deadpool & wolverine
➵ shall i revamp the blog theme guys? i don't have any ideas but idk if you guys are bored by it haha
➵ send me requests if you have ‘em. enjoy!
warnings || fluff/smut/a wee bit of angst
➵ fingering
➵ age gap (not a plot point)
(tell me if i miss anything)
having 2 people in a one bedroom apartment was already cramped. 3 is insane. as much as wade tried, he felt bad for poor hugh's - *cough* logan's back for constantly swapping between the dingy couch and the mattress on the floor to sleep.
and the wolverine was never the type to ask for help, it pissed him off. they had been nearly atomized together for christ's sake!
another room on the floor had opened up, and as much as wade wanted to kick blind al off to that room instead, he knew the old lady wouldn't be able to pay the whole rent herself, and he had to make sure she didn't use too much fun-time sugar under fox's watchful eye. luckily, neither did logan have to live alone, as wade was quick to find a down-on-her-luck college girl who needed cheap rent.
so, now wade's stuck with an ornery old woman, and pretty-boy - well, man - logan got to have a cute girl as his roommate. just his luck. he checked in on his fellow invincible often, and as much as logan didn't talk, wade knew he didn't mind her one bit.
she tried to be a good roommate - cook breakfast for the both of them, pick up a sweet treat for him too if she was getting one for herself, and trying to keep to herself with the studying. but she couldn't help the little crush that she had on her roommate. like, come on.
older, mature, mysterious, downright yummy? what's a girl to do? she kept it to herself, but seeing him smirk or chuckle when she realizes she's accidentally been staring at him in that leather jacket or shirtless going to bed. at least she doesn't make him uncomfortable, but it feels pretty dismissive - how he sees her as such a fucking kid that he can't even take her attraction seriously.
logan took it very fucking seriously.
every day was a mental challenge - truly, god gives his worst temptations to his strongest soldiers. the liquor on his breath was still strong, not now because his life was ruined, but rather because his mind was.
this cute, young girl who looked at him like he was the solution to all her relationship issues, like his old-man body was good enough to fucking eat? it was a miracle that he hadn't taken her. and she just looked so beautiful as she got ready for bed, or as she bobbed her head to music while she studied, or as she buzzed around the small kitchen to cook her third cheap pasta for the week.
it didn't help how she'd always ask how he is, buy him little things to keep his mood up, and always offered to take the couch. he'd rather eat glass than let her sleep on the couch, but nonetheless, she offered every day.
fuck. it was impossible to sleep when she was just behind the wall, in her fucking shorts and tank. unbelievable. he needed a fucking drink.
some nights, he'll come home in the evenings to an empty house. it's rare - she doesn't have too much money to go out, but when she does, she'll usually warn him she'll be home late. he always makes sure to stay awake until she gets home, and even had the privilege of going into downtown to pick her up after the friends she was with had managed to lose her. she had hiccuped, tearing up in embarrassment as she watched him approach her drunk form leaning on a tree outside. she had thought the stern arch of his brow was because of her calling him so late, when really, he was just angry that her friends had the audacity to put her in such a dangerous situation.
"it's windy." he grunts, and she looks down at her short, strappy dress, ashamed.
"s-sorry. we drove here." she tries to explain, and logan relents, brow going from angry to grumpy.
"yeah." he finally sighs, walking with her back to their place. seeing her hands go to cradle her elbows, he places his leather jacket over her shoulders, and she swallows thickly.
"you don't have to-" but he's lighting a cigar as she speaks, in just his wifebeater he'd been lounging in. she decides to shut up, silent until they reach the house.
he helps her in and then waits outside to finish the cigar, and after she gets in, she sighs softly, carefully placing the jacket down. she starts trying to make logan some dinner as a thank-you, but passes out at the dinner table half-way through. luckily, she hadn't had the stove on, and logan's heart melts as he sees her, halfway through mixing a few eggs, head lolling off the chair as she drools a little.
cutie, he thinks, separating her fingers from the fork and bowl, and carrying her into the bed. as he tries to set her down, her fingers clutch his arm, and a small, sleepy whine leaves her.
logan's not a man to blush, but hearing that little beg for him to stay makes him fucking burn. he looks down at her, a hand running through his hair, and he gently tries to let her down again. she just holds on tighter, groaning, "warm..." a little mumble escapes her, and logan huffs. of course it's not that she wants him, she's just cold. he sighs, sitting down and letting her cuddle into his arm.
he had planned to leave once she'd passed out, but it was late, and he was old, so he had ended up just sleeping next to her anyways. the sun's rays the next morning pierce his eyes, and he sighs softly, waking up next to her. he swallows thickly, watching the way the sun hits her form, bathing her exposed skin in orange and amber.
the moment is broken by her startling awake. for a moment, she sighs happily, thinking that this was just a continuation of her dream about logan, where she wakes up next to him after a night of great sex, and they both live happily ever after. then she blinks.
his bicep feels bigger than in the dream, his face looks a little more real, he's- real?!
she squeaks, immediately sitting up.
"logan?"
"don't go getting any ideas in your head." he immediately defends, sighing. "you called me last night."
she bites her lip.
"you took me home?"
"put you in bed too. then ya fucking kept me on ya like a boa." he's joking, but she still struggles to tell between his grumpy voice and his joking grumpy voice.
"fuck, i'm really sorry, must have ruined your night-" she starts, and he gets up, ruffling her hair.
"it's okay. better knowing you were safe." it leaves her a little star struck, especially when he then goes to continue making the omelette she had tried to make last night.
he's cooking for her for once and she gets such a nice view of his broad back in that wife-beater. maybe things aren't that bad.
knowing how she always texts if she's out late, he's a bit confused to come home to an empty room. he huffs, trying not to panic, but he can't help how much he care for the girl. he leans back, lounging on the couch.
as an hour passes with no texts, he's about to get up and ... do something. look for her, call her - something.
just then, she walks through the door, purse dropping on the floor with a thud.
that's an attitude he hadn't seen before. she looks like a deer in headlights when she notices that he is in fact home.
"o-oh." she blinks, quickly picking up the purse, as if to console it. "wade said you weren't home." logan raises a brow, a little curious why the other man would say that.
"long day?" he finally comments, and she breathes out.
"shit day." she corrects. logan's brow furrows.
"hmm." he murmurs, stretching his arm out over the back of the couch. an open invitation. she hesitates but... he looks warm.
conservatively, she sits beside him, hands in her lap. she's not even paying attention to whatever channel logan has on as background noise.
theres maybe 5 solid minutes of silence.
finally, she sighs.
"i'm gonna go to bed." she murmurs softly, getting up. logan wraps his fingers around her palm.
"talk to me." he mumbles gruffly, and she knows that's a pretty big first step for him. she bites her lip, sitting back down, and takes a deep breath.
"got stood up." it's little more than a whisper, and she feels a pout forming on her lips, which she tries to reverse, to little avail. it's silent again, and she wonders if logan heard her.
of course, he did - spending a moment processing who the hell would stand her up.
"i'm sorry." his rough fingers press over hers, comforting, and she can't help but sink more into him than the couch cushions.
it feels nice, more right than the kisses she'd shared with the guy she'd been seeing.
"whatever." she tries to mumble, trying not to show her hurt.
"he's an idiot." his hand slips around her shoulders, and he can feel her pulse quicken.
"i'm an idiot."
"he's an idiot." he repeats sternly. "who was he?" she bites her lip.
"some... guy." logan suppresses a scoffing bark.
"not if he's got you like this." he looks down at her. she's ashamed to look up at him.
"i don't know... i just really liked him. i thought he liked me too." she feels a tear slip out, and logan's fist squeezes in anger as he sees her quickly wipe it away.
"he should be singin' his prayers that he even got your attention." that makes her giggle - strained, but there. he prefers the sound to her defeated mumbles. "look at me." he murmurs, taking her chin and angling it to face him. his eyes travel down to the cute dress she'd put on for her date - low cut, perfectly form fitting, "he's a fucking idiot." he whispers, hand slipping down to her waist.
"yeah?" she whispers, significantly less focused on aforementioned 'fucking idiot' now.
"yeah, princess." he murmurs, hand gently running up and down her side. he knows he shouldn't, but he can practically feel the jump of her heart at the endearment. "you like that? princess?" his voice almost has a teasing lilt, and her lids flutter at the difference in tension from 2 minutes ago.
"a little." her face looks so bashful, so unsure. after that depressing feeling of not being wanted - god, he wants to pull her out of that so bad.
"should be treated like a princess." she shifts imperceptibly closer.
"got a guy who'll do that for me?" she teases, and logan scoffs softly.
"you know i do." his voice carries that gruffness even with how quiet he is, speaking into the small space between their lips. "you know, princess."
she breathes out shakily, leaning forward, when logan pulls her chin, pressing his lips to hers. she whimpers softly, finding her hands and placing them at his nape, not wanting to let go. it's not rough, but needy, his other hand slipping to the hem of her dress on her thigh. she hums into his lips, as he pulls away, a little breathless.
"don't - we shouldn't." he whispers, and a pout graces her lips - a proper one.
"why?"
"yer upset." he sighs, but doesn't move away.
"about?" she says playfully, having fully forgotten about her evening; she'd been waiting for this for so long. he lets out a gruff bark of a laugh, pulling her closer, and she adjusts, getting on his lap.
"come on, bub." he scolds again, and she hums, leaning down to kiss him.
"please?" she whispers, against his lips. he groans.
"jesus, what're y'doin' to me?" his head tilts back, and she giggles, exhilarated that she's got him like this. her hands trail down his arms - god, his arms - tracing the veins, somehow always bulging, as she gently leans forward again, kissing him. this time, theres a bit more tongue, and he pulls her closer roughly, gnashing their teeth together. she moans softly into his mouth, fingers finding his rough palm. he grips them tight - not enough to hurt, but just enough to show that he's holding back.
"i'm not made of glass." she teases, and he scoffs softly.
"i could snap ya'n half." his mumble finds his way back into her lips, and she has to control herself to not showhow much the little quip affected her.
"maybe i want you to."
"jesus." he flips her over, onto her back, "got this pretty little dress on, fuck, that guy's an idiot." his hands travel down her thighs, and she bites her lip, a massive grin on her face.
"you like it?" she murmurs softly, playing with the strap of her dress.
"whadya think?" he huffs, and she giggles.
"and if i told you i got it for you?" logan presses a hot kiss to the side of her thigh.
"i'd tell ya to get a dozen more." his lips move up her thigh slowly, and she lets out a shaky breath.
"god, logan." her whispers of his name are like music to his ear, and he leaves a small bite by the hem of her dress.
"gotta tell me if i hurt you." he mutters, more seriously, and she smiles.
"only fun if it hurts."
"i'm serious, princess." she relents.
"i'll tell you." he sighs in content, gently riding her dress off.
"this okay?"
"more than okay." she helps him, pulling the dress over her hips, her lacy panties peeking under the fabric. when he spends just a bit too long staring, she giggles, "you can touch." she affirms, and he barks out a gruff lap.
"could'a guessed that much." his fingers trace the hem of them, travelling down her inner thighs. her breath hitches, and she gently rolls her hips, desperate for more.
"please, logan." she whispers, breathing a bit labored. though he'd love to tease, he's getting desperate too.
"gotta tell me what ya want, princess." he murmurs, and she bites her lip, almost shy again. it's cute.
"touch me?" she murmurs, almost like it's a favor she's asking. he kisses her thigh again, before gently peeling the panties off. he lets out a soft groan at how slick she is, fingers catching her arousal as they travel down her slit. she lets out a shocked gasp - practically a moan - and he fucking loves it.
`'need them, princess?" he smirks at her, and she nods, almost pathetically.
"god, i do." he obliges, gently prodding her entrance with his middle finger. he slips in with little resistance, but jesus, he can feel how tight she is.
"fuck, yer gonna be the death of me, princess." he groans softly, and she lets out a breathy giggle.
"thought that doesn't happen to you?"
"well, never had a girl as pretty as you." he murmurs, slipping another finger in. she flushes, back arching as his fingers do, body warm as she rocks her hips in time with his ministrations.
"faster?" she begs softly, and he could never say no to those big doe eyes. he starts moving faster, her slick absolutely coating his fingers, and she moans louder, hips moving in a more stuttered rhythm.
"like that?" that teasing lilt is in his voice, and she nods furiously.
"j-just like that-" she stammers, mind already foggy, "god, i'm close, please don't stop."
"not in a million years, princess." she lets out a loud moan as she can feel herself unraveling, the orgasm so powerful that her thighs shake around him as she cums. she pants as he helps her ride through it.
"good girl, just like that, princess," he consoles, "so fuckin' pretty for me, ain't cha?" he grins, as she starts to come down. as her breathing slows, so too do his fingers, before slowly sliding them out of her. he gently rubs her clit, just to see her jolt at the stimulation, before chuckling, and placing his soaked fingers onto his tongue.
she lets out another moan as she watches him, with lidded eyes.
"i'll cum again." she warns, playfully, and he's gleeful. she tastes like fruit.
"i plan on it, princess." she feels her cheeks warm.
"that's the hardest i've cum in a while." she admits shyly.
"sounded like it." he teases, but before they can get anything else out, there's banging on the wall that connected them to wade and blind al.
"these walls are paper thin!" al's screech sounds a little traumatized, and her scolding make both her and logan whip around, embarrassed.
"for once in my life, i agree with her! shut up, lovebirds, i wanna fucking sleep!" wade's voice is equally exasperated.
there's silence, until she calls back a bashful, "sorry!" she turns to logan, almost laughing, but still flushed with shame. "maybe we should stop. he scoffs.
"nah, just means i gotta teach ya to be quiet."
safe to say, she's not thinking at all about her date tonight.
#mcu imagine#marvel#logan howlett#logan howlett oneshot#logan howlett imagine#logan howlett x reader#mcu#wolverine#wolverine x reader#deadpool and wolverine#logan howlett fluff#logan howlett smut#hugh jackman#stood up
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i missed u - myg x reader
ex boyfriend yoongi...
lately @desertsunflower00 and i have not been able to shut up about an ex boyfriend!yoongi au so here i am trying to bring it to life :')
please be nice! i haven't written (for fun!) in about a year, but it's been encouraged by my therapist so here we are!
not proofread!
pairings: yoongi x y/n
warnings: feelings + avoiding feelings, exes, angst, smut (sex, making out, dry humping, hickies, unprotected sex, light exhibitionism (sorta?)
word count: 3,000
(also noteworthy: when I started this I didn't think it would be angsty, but it got away from me lol. definitely have an alternate ending in my drafts w a not as happy ending lol but I did my best to give these idiots hope in this one)
Yoongi noticed the goosebumps on your arm caused by the cool air blowing from his car. Without a second thought he adjusted the temperature to make it more comfortable for you.
He also noticed the way your eyes glanced from his face, to the hands gripping the steering wheel, and the back up to his face. With that he couldn't help the smirk that spread across his face.
That was the thing about Yoongi. He noticed everything about you. Even after breaking up with him he wasn't able to erase the way he responded to you - or the way he knew you.
You sighed, forcing your eyes off of him and back on the road ahead of you. The pink sky was slowly deepening into dark shades of indigo and violet. Your heart squeezed in your chest thinking of the way things had happened with Yoongi.
"I thought I was supposed to be the quiet one," he looked over at you, soft smile on his face. Your leg continued to bounce in nervousness.
"I'm just thinking," you hope that would satisfy him enough, but just as well of Yoongi knew you - you knew him.
You knew Yoongi probably better than you knew anyone else. Yourself included some may argue.
"Hm," he hummed unimpressed with your response. "Do you want me to take you back home? If you don't want to -"
"No!" you cut him off, looking back over at him. "I want this. I missed you," you admitted. You felt your face warm and you hoped Yoongi didn't notice the nervousness coming from you.
But of course he did.
His eyes met yours for what felt like an entire minute. A million things unsaid in his gaze.
A million things you weren't sure if you were ready to hear.
But he knew that.
Instead of saying all the things he wished he could, he let out a breath he had been holding and steered the car in a different direction.
You knew the way to his house - which is where you thought you were headed - but this wasn't it.
"Where are we going?" you question, watching the tall trees as you pass by.
"We need to talk - really talk," he looked at you when he emphasized the words, "and I can't do that if I'm driving so," he points his chin forward, showing you were approaching the lake nearby. "We're making a pit stop," he smiled your favorite smile. The smile that made his eyes crinkle and his gums show proudly.
He stopped the car after parking it to perfectly face the waterfront. The remaining sun shimmered off the water. Families at the playground were packing up their things and loading their kids in minivans.
"Really talk?" you shift in your seat to face him. "What does that mean?"
"Well," he slowly reached forward and used the knuckle of his index to lift your chin to meet his deep gaze. "When you texted me earlier and said you missed me and wanted to see me..." he let the question hang in the air for a moment, taking in every detail of your face.
"What did that mean?" he finished his sentence.
Was he regretting this? You shouldn't have reached out. Maybe you should have listened to the little voice in your head - he didn't want the same thing you did.
"I do miss you and I wanted to see you." you scanned his face for any sign that he didn't actually want this as much as you.
"Right," he nodded, "But since you got in my car you've acted like I'm some stranger," he chuckled, "It's just me, Y/N."
"Did you miss me?" the question leaves your lips before you can even think to stop it.
"I don't think I'll ever stop." he spoke the words with such reverent force it makes your heart still for a second.
It's your turn to nod - agreeing with all the unspoken words between you.
With as small as the interior of his car is, you still feel him too far away. He's less than a foot away and yet the small distance feels miles long.
"I don't think much has changed," you admit - your mind racing at all the possibilities if you were to try again with Yoongi. Would it even work? Why was your mind already there? You were here with him now. Just... catching up.
"Well, my hairs gotten longer," he joked trying to ease you. He tugs at his new length. His dark looked so inviting at this length. You fought the urge to reach across and card your fingers through it.
Thick dark hair, slightly curing inward at the nape of his neck. It was probably long enough to pull up into a little bun if he wanted.
"I like it," and the urge won - your hand reaches over and caress his locks.
Yoongi halts - letting you touch him. It was the first time you've touched him since you walked away from him over a month ago.
Had it only been a month? Being without him for that long had felt so much longer.
Yoongi grabbed your wrist before you can pull your hand away from him and brings it up to his lips, softly kissing your knuckles.
"You know we don't have to have any answers right now..." he slowly lowered your hand, but continued to hold it - intertwining his fingers with yours. That brought back so many memories.
Locking hands under blankets during movie nights. Secret hand holding under dinner tables. His hand firmly guiding you through crowded streets.
His hands intertwined with yours while his face was buried between your legs.
"I just mean..." his thumb rubbed over the back of your hand in the most soothing pattern, "Let's take it one step at a time okay. This doesn't have to mean anything you don't want it to mean."
"Okay," you sigh trying to relax against his leather seat. It was what you wanted to hear, right? It didn't have to mean anything. It could just be.
It could just be you and him.
No expectations. No promises. Just now.
You let out a deep breath again, looking down at his hand holding yours.
"Does that mean we can go to your place now. To do something other than talk..."
That makes him fill the car with the sweet sound of his laughter. Low, raspy, laughter that sends a message right to your core.
You can't help but adoringly roll your eyes at his response. That eye roll made him know you felt more comfortable than when he picked you up. He could almost feel the bleak tension dissolve and be replaced with a different type of tension.
The type of tension that made him stir in his seat.
Yoongi reaches over to cup your face, pulling you in closer. Gently closing the space between you both. Seconds before he presses his lips to yours, his eyes look into yours again wanting to give you all the answers you wanted.
And with that, his pink lips pressed against yours. Gently at first. Testing the waters, kissing you so softly it almost pained you.
And then he does it again, but this time with so much more force. His kiss makes you gasp against his mouth - his lips taking claim over yours. His silky tongue traced your lips until your tongue met his.
All too soon he pulled away. His cheeks were stained pink and his lips were puffy from the force of your kiss. Yoongi's eyes held a devilish glint in them as he pulled back - knowing he left you wanting more.
"I don't think I can make it all the way back home now," he glanced down at the hardening bulge in his black jeans. You could barely make it out now that the sun had set.
The street lamp beside Yoongi's car set a soft glow to everything. The deep waters now a deep shade of black, reflected back the moons radiance.
You glanced around the lake and take in the stillness of it all. The quiet chirp of crickets somewhere in the grassy sedges. The low hum of Yoongi's engine. His soft breath fanning your face. His fingertips tenderly brushing over your lips.
You placed your hand on his crotch feeling him hardening under his jeans.
"Yoongi," your voice came out whiner than you expected. It was also the first time he heard you call his name since things ended. That did something to him he didn't quite know how to describe. But he swore he felt his heart (and his cock) grow three times in size.
"I want you so bad." The soft lighting pouring into the car made his smooth skin appear even clearer and glassier. You wanted to press your lips all over his face. Cover him in berry stained lipstick marks.
He nodded his head slightly pulling away from you to be able to shift the car into reverse. Before he could place his hand on the gear, you wrapped yours around his wrist, shaking your head 'no.'
"Here," you bit your lower lip, glancing out at the empty lake. "No one's here. No one's gonna see us," you urge, bringing his hand to your thigh.
Before he can say another word, you press your lips to his, mumbling an almost incoherent, "I can't wait," against his mouth.
"Fuck," Yoongi groaned into the kiss. "Want you too, baby."
Yoongi doesn't mean for the word to slip out, but it does.
It is messy and a little clumsy - much like how your relationship had been. But it's also what makes you and Yoongi so special to each other. There was no need for pretenses of perfection.
He scooted his seat back giving you enough room to climb over the console and into the safety of his lap. His large hands found their home along your lower back; they slipped themselves into your shirt, feeling your smooth skin all the way up to your bra strap and then back down, gripping your hips. "Y/N," he sighed, into your mouth as you grind your hips down on him.
"Let's get these off." he reached into your skirt to find your soaked panties. His long fingers traced along the wet patch you've left on them from grinding on his lap. "So wet," he mumbled almost to himself.
Lifting your hips to help him, he expertly slid them down your legs, helping you get them off. He tossed them aside before placing you back down on his lap, the steering wheel pressing into your back while he slid his hand up your thigh. Dragging each finger over the smooth surface until he was met with your wet folds. "I need to fuck you," he choked out and smashed your lips with an urgent kiss.
You let him fumble with his pants until he is able to free his leaking cock. You wished there were more light in the dim car to be able to indulge in seeing it again. The thick veins along the flushed pink shaft, the prominent head, now leaking with precum. You wanted to take it all in.
Yoongi grabbed his length in his hand guiding you as you align yourself with him. He stroke his cock along your pussy, teasingly tapping it against your clit a couple of times.
"Yoongi, please," you whined at the sudden contact, "I need you,"
"I know, baby," he shushed you, pulling you in for another kiss. He caught your lower lip between his teeth, tugging on it gently before slipping his tongue in your mouth. He grabbed your hips and pulled you in closer and you slowly sank down on his aching cock.
You winced at the stretch of his head pushing inside of you. Your arms grabbed on to the headrest behind his head and gripped it tightly as his cock stretched you open.
"Fuck," the word slipped out of your lips against his hot mouth as you felt the fullness of having his cock inside you again.
"You okay?" Yoongi pulled back and scanned your face.
"Mhm," you nodded your head. "It's just so... big," you let out a weak chuckle.
He rubbed circles along your back until his hands found their way to grip your ass.
You began to lift your hips and rocked your body on him. His large hands caught your movements as you ground yourself down on his length. Slowly at first, but quickly picking up momentum you started to ride him.
Completely feeling lost in the bliss of having so close - a part of you wished the skin of your chest could touch his. Everywhere he touched you felt like a familiar flame licking away at the time spent apart.
Like he wanted his hands to erase every minute he spent away from you.
He found his way further into your shirt, cupping your breasts in his hold. His thumbs finding your erect nipples as you bounced up and down his shaft.
The sounds of the chirping crickets and low hum of his engine - sounds that felt so loud in the stillness of the evening were now drowned out by something much more titillating.
Your breathy moans and his low groans were creating a symphony of pleasure - in that moment he swore he'd write a song someday about just how good it felt to have you in his embrace.
"Yoongi," you choked out, your legs trembled beneath you.
"Let me hear you, baby," he said into your ear, peppering sweet, wet kisses along your neck. "Who's making you feel this good?"
"You..." you tilted your head back providing more access to your neck. He sank his teeth into your skin, making you hiss in pleasure.
"You... you're making me feel so good. No one else..." you babbled as he sucked on the most delicate part of your neck.
The spot on your neck that made your thighs squeeze together - but he knew that. He knew every spot that made your heart race.
"No one else, hm?" that smug smile spread across his face again. You wanted nothing more than to kiss it off of him.
He noticed your hands gripping the back of his headrest and frowned. He grabbed your wrist and placed your hands in his hair. His eyes silently begged and you complied.
You tangled your fingers in his dark locks and tugged at the root of his long hair as you chased your orgasm.
Yoongi's moan mixed with yours as you pulled on his hair the closer you got to cumming on his cock.
"Keep going, you're doing so well..." his eyes rolled back and his hands gripped on to your hips tightly. You sensed the bruise of his fingertips engraving into your skin.
Just another way Yoongi left his mark on you.
But bruises and hickies fade over time - you weren't sure if the mark he made in your heart would ever really go away.
Not when he looked at you like you hung the stars for him. And you would. You'd give him the stars and moon and everything he asked for if he wanted.
"Gonna cum," he groaned, hiding his face in your neck peppering the skin with little kisses, moaning against your collarbone.
He felt your nails dig into his shoulders as you came undone along with him. Your fluids mixed as he filled your cunt with his cum. You collapsed forward onto him, resting your head on his shoulder as he held you. Your legs twitched as your orgasm hit.
Yoongi held you until your breathing returned to normal. He idly rubbed up and down your back, softly kissing your temples every now and then whispering sweet praises to you.
"I don't wanna move," you mumbled, your eyes closed just listening to Yoongi's soft, even breaths.
"Then don't move," he brushed his hands over your cheek. "Just stay like this with me."
You let out a tired laugh - could it really be that easy? To stay with him?
You knew there was so much that was still left unsaid.
"I should go home," you sat up straighter on his lap to take a good look at him. You hated how it felt like another goodbye.
"Y/N."
You shook your head and started to lift yourself off of him. you both winced at the feeling of his cock leaving your pussy. Yoongi did his best to help get you clean, wiping up your thighs, silently cleaning you up before you crawled back to your seat.
"Are you regretting it?" his lips were set in a straight line and his tone shot an arrow to your chest. The last thing you wanted was to hurt him.
"What?" you met his fixed look, trying to read behind the hardness in his eyes.
He lifted an eyebrow waiting for your answer. He didn't bother repeating the question he knew you heard.
"No," you reached for his hand, using both of yours to cup one of his. "Just... not knowing what happens next makes it feel like goodbye again and... I don't think I'm ready for that," you admit.
His eyes soften hearing you admit you don't want to say goodbye to him again.
You didn't know if a relationship with Yoongi would work out or not at this time. Really, what growth could have happened in the month apart to make him ready?
"One step at a time, okay?" he reminded you gently.
You nodded your head, allowing him to pull you back into another kiss.
"I wanna be someone you deserve," he whispered against your mouth.
Every part of you wanted to ignore the ways he had fucked up in the past and tell him it was all okay - but you couldn't lie to yourself or him. You both needed time.
"One step at a time," you repeated those words to him before kissing him back again.
--
THANK YOU FOR READING! was vry nervous to post bc I haven't done it in so long, but this was really fun to write! I didn't realize how much I missed it and ofc I feel so rusty so I hope you enjoyed <3
tagging some of my fav creators on here: @gimmethatagustd @raplinesmoon @wonhosmistress
(also pls lmk if you don't wanna be tagged! last time I posted I was in a writing network and it was shut down so now idk what the etiquette for sharing/tagging is im sorry fdkgjd ily I haven't been on here in a while but can't wait to catch up/re-read some of my fav fics too)
#min yoongi#yoongi x reader#yoongi smut#yoongi angst#yoongi fanfic#bts fanfic#bts fanfction#bangtan#suga smut#suga angst#bts smut#bts angst#bts fluff#yoongi fluff#suga x reader#yoongi x y/n#suga x y/n#yoongi#suga#bts#bangtan sonyeondan#exes to lovers#sorta
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relax (hwang hyunjin x fem!reader)
nerd!hyunjin x cheerleader!reader, secret relationship, heavy make out, suggestive at the end; 1.8k words
author’s note: alrighty so it may not be my best work, but i love love love the idea and i hope you’ll at least like it a little bit lol anyway enjoy and remember that feedback and reblogs are highly appreciated🫶🏽
06:47 PM
you: meet me in the locker room after the match
you: don’t be late~
hyunjin’s phone buzzed as he sat uncomfortably between other students in the stands, praying that the match wouldn't take too long. it was hot and crowded and hyunjin was wondering how people could go to matches every week or so and actually enjoy it. he didn’t want to be there, wishing to disappear or teleport to his room, but he knew he had to endure in order to see you. he missed you - not that he hadn’t seen you the same day in the hallway, but what good is it for him to see you if he couldn't even talk to you?
the loud sound of the whistle snapped him out of his reverie. the other students started cheering loudly, whistling and shouting when the match started and hyunjin didn’t know what to do - was he supposed to cheer as well? or maybe boo the opposing team? he was completely lost. in this whole confusion, hyunjin tried to find you on the pitch. he noticed a few other cheerleaders before the match, but there was no trace of you. what if you weren’t even performing that day and he was sitting there for nothing?
the cheerleaders started their chant as the first point was scored and it was only then when hyunjin stood up and finally noticed you. you looked ethereal - your hair bounced with every movement and the cheerleader outfit you were wearing made his head spin. he sighed dreamily - you were absolutely beautiful and he couldn’t get over how it was him who could kiss you and hold your hand and call you his. well, not entirely.
it was hyunjin’s idea to keep your relationship a secret. as he watched you in the hallway, always surrounded by handsome jocks and plenty of your cheerleader friends, he felt small, almost nonexistent. was he even worth being near you? he felt sick at the mere thought of people seeing you together and he didn’t want to embarrass you in front of your friends. did he feel good about the whole secret relationship thing though? absolutely not, but you assured him plenty of times that you’re willing to wait as long as he needed to finally reveal yourselves. he trusted you, so he just let himself enjoy the moment.
hyunjin adjusted his glasses as another point was scored. he was bouncing his leg nervously, waiting impatiently for the referee to announce the end of the match. it was getting late and hyunjin wasn’t satisfied with only looking at you from a distance - he needed to be closer.
── ࣪˖ ࣪ ⊹ ࣪ ˖ ──
you breathed a sigh of relief when the match was over, smiling at the team and congratulating them.
“great job, boys,” you let out, trying to quickly head to the locker room. however, one of the players had a different plan and wrapped his arm around your waist. you stopped in your tracks, freezing uncomfortably.
“i’m hosting a party tonight, wanna come?” he asked, his lips too close to your ear for your liking. you smiled faintly, trying to break free from his grip.
“i’d love to, but i can’t tonight, sorry,” you said in an apologetic tone, but he didn’t seem to buy your lame excuse. he removed his hand anyway and ran to the rest of his team, leaving you alone without a word. the rest of your cheerleader team went with the boys as well, laughing at their jokes and drooling over their athletic bodies. you scoffed, but paid no further attention to it as you sprinted to the locker room to get there on time.
the room was dark when you entered it, a shiver going down your spine as you closed the door behind you. you hoped hyunjin didn’t forget or worse - didn’t change his mind.
from the very beginning you were completely infatuated by hyunjin, his talent for drawing and loser-like personality. he may have been clumsy and a bit scatterbrained, but it was exactly what made him, well, him. you tried to persuade him to let go and be open about your relationship, but he was adamant on keeping it secret. it made you a little sad, of course, but you accepted his decision regardless. in fact, if you thought about it, you kind of liked hiding in closets and stealing kisses when no one was looking.
a sudden tug on the doorknob brought you out of your thoughts. you opened the door and saw breathless hyunjin barely standing. you grabbed his shirt and dragged him inside, smiling sheepishly.
“what took you so long?” you whispered loudly, locking the door and scanning his figure. he raised his finger, taking a moment to regulate his breathing.
“i tried to avoid the crowd and, um… got lost,” hyunjin mumbled with rosy cheeks, nervously scratching the back of his neck. you giggled, taking a step in his direction and adjusting the crooked glasses on his nose. he brought his arms to your hips - a habit you taught him. he was staring at you with wide eyes and suddenly the air in the room thickened.
“why are you looking at me like that?”
“you looked really pretty today. i kinda wanted to paint you,” he whispered with rosy cheeks, his gaze wandering back and forth between your eyes and your lips. you smiled at his words, feeling as your face got warmer. you were sure he was so gonna paint you after today.
“go on,” you said, your voice barely above the whisper. “i know you wanna kiss me.” hyunjin blinked a few times, his brain going haywire. although he had kissed you plenty of times before, usually it was you who initiated it, not him.
he leaned a bit closer, his breath speeding up as you placed your hand on his cheek. he hesitated when he felt your hot breath on his face, but one look from you dispelled his worries and he placed a sloppy kiss on your lips. his moves were uncoordinated, almost random, and you quickly started to get impatient, but decided to let him take control for now. he has to learn, you thought to yourself.
your hands wandered all over his chest and face as he slowly but gradually deepened the kiss, making your head spin a little. his grip on your hips tightened and you were going feral.
“hyune,” you breathed out, pointing to the shelf standing against the wall. even in his state he managed to drag you there and awkwardly helped you to sit on it. you brought your hand to his hair, tugging at it slightly and earning a quiet groan from him.
“shit,” hyunjin muttered as his glasses tilted on his nose again. he tried to fix them, but you grabbed his hand, bringing it to your neck instead.
“leave them be,” you said, parting your legs so hyunjin could stand closer to you. he yelped as you dragged him between them, the feeling of your thighs trapping him made his brain malfunction.
after what felt like eternity you broke the kiss to catch your breath. hyunjin’s cheeks were as red as a tomato and you laughed at his state. he looked drunk, his tilted glasses only added to the impression.
“what?” he asked dumbfounded, looking around.
“nothing, just-” you reached out to adjust his glasses. “there. you looked funny.” hyunjin pouted at your words and you smiled. you felt giddy when you looked at him and you never wanted the feeling to go away.
“but you told me to leave them like that…” you giggled at his reaction, a pleasant warmth spreading in your chest.
the comfortable silence settled between you two as hyunjin intently scanned your face, taking in every detail for the millionth time. your gaze wandered after his, his brown eyes observing your features like a curious child taking in the wonders of the world.
“who was that guy you talked to after the match?” he suddenly blurted out and it took you off guard. your face twisted in confusion as you tried to recall the situation. oh.
“it was one of the teammates. he hosted a party tonight and tried to persuade me to go,” you explained, wrapping your arms around his neck.
“oh,” he let out. “okay. do you… do you like him?”
“hyune, are you jealous?” he dropped his head - suddenly your shoes were way more interesting than your face. “hey, look at me,” you ordered him softly but firmly, placing a finger under his chin.
“sorry.”
you shook your head. “you have nothing to apologise for, okay? i’m sorry that it made you jealous.” hyunjin nodded at your words, a sudden wave of guilt overflowing his senses. “if it makes you feel better, he is a complete asshole. and i don’t like him,” you laughed and he smiled faintly, straightening his back. “now, where were we?”
you leaned forward and captured his lips in a passionate kiss, your tongue asking for entrance, which made hyunjin’s knees buck under him. he grabbed your shoulders, but you only ran your hand over his back in a soothing manner. though scared, hyunjin let your tongue in - it was sloppy and uncoordinated, because even if it was you who led the kiss, he still felt like a lost child in the wilderness.
“relax,” you mumbled into his mouth as you sensed his fear. i’m trying, he wanted to say, but he only let out a small whimper, dropping his arms to rest on your hips. with all his might he forced him to cool off. relax, hyunjin, he repeated in his head over and over again and he didn’t even notice when his tongue started to move with yours in unison.
“i missed you,” you suddenly uttered, breaking the kiss. hyunjin looked at you with wide eyes.
“really?” he asked and you giggled.
“of course, dummy. why are you surprised?” you tilted your head. “aren’t my kisses enough proof?” you teased, placing your hands on his chest. his heart was pounding, all because of you.
hyunjin shrugged his shoulders, his breathing speeding up. “no! no, it’s not that, i just… i dunno, i’m- i’m scared that this-” he moved his hand between your bodies. “-is just a dream. and i don’t wanna wake up.” oh. you looked him straight in the eyes.
“you know i’m serious when i say i like you, right?” you asked hesitantly, taking his hand in yours. it was sweaty from all the tension. you rubbed his palm with your thumb to calm him down.
hyunjin looked at you with a puzzled expression. “y-yeah, i know,” he said with a shaky voice. you placed a feather-like kiss to his cheek, then another one, going down to his jaw and neck, peppering him with soft pecks - a sealing of your words. he melted under your touch, his eyes wide open as he stared into the wall behind you, unable to move. “hey, you know what? i’m kinda hungry,” you said suddenly, bringing hyunjin back to you. he let out a small hm? and you spoke again with a smirk plastered on your face. “wanna eat some ramen with me?”
taglist ! @astraystayyh @laylasbunbunny @l3visbby @like-a-diamondinthesky @hanjsquokka @xichien @xocandyy @minhosbitterriver
#skz#stray kids#stray kids x reader#stray kids headcanons#stray kids imagines#stray kids scenarios#skz au#stray kids fluff#skz hard thoughts#skz hard hours#skz hyunjin#hyunjin x reader#hyunjin scenarios#hyunjin fluff#hyunjin imagines#hyunjin hard thoughts#hyunjin hard hours
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Back To Normalcy
[JJ Maybank x reader]
summary: JJ often caught your unfocused gaze drifting to a random corner, lost inside your head. After Morocco, he noticed that a lot.
pairing: jj maybank x f!reader
w.c: 2.8K
warnings/content: near death experiences (flashbacks); obx4 ending is discussed (as in graphic descriptions of what happened so be aware); jj being the best whipped boyfriend; PTSD is hinted; hurt/comfort (trust me, no one dies); paragraphs in italics are flashbacks.
A/N: this is kind of a fix-it and it is set after the pogues find the blue crown. it will have discrepancies regarding canon cause I didn't watch obx4 part 2. bear with me. I'm editing this in the middle of class lol. merry christmas to those who celebrate and a happy new years!!!
navi
masterpost
obx masterlist
request me something
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“So it's like... We gotta think of everything. Yeah, we found it, but we gotta—”
“... Have a solid plan, yeah, Pope.” John B cut him off, earning a glare which made the edge of his lips quirk up in amusement. If there was one thing the Pogues had fun in doing, that thing was annoying Pope Heyward. It was just too easy. “Sorry, sorry.” The Routledge boy raised his arms, pretending to surrender but the grin in his mouth betrayed him. John B never felt the will to smile more than he did in that moment. He had his friends. His family. With him. Safe and sound. Finally. Everyone in one piece. Barely. . . And back home. What more could he ask for?
What more could any of them ask for, really?
You tuned out the conversation for the tenth time that night. You loved bonfires. Especially the ones where your friends organized, where you felt at home around their stupid jokes and drunk laughter.
But you couldn't focus tonight. Somehow you always ended up right back in the scalding sand of Morocco, blood sipping through your fingers as tried desperately to stop it. Your screams of agony even though you weren't the one stabbed echoed through your brain like you had worked hard to memorize it.
You'd rather it had been you, actually. No doubt about that.
The soft nudge in your leg made you step out of the infusion of bad memories your head had conjured up. As your eyes adjusted to the bonfire's flames, you noticed all your friends staring at you in expectancy.
“What?”
Instead of the nudge, you felt cold fingers come in contact with your thigh and you almost flinched at the coldness — that coldness — before you caught the beer bottle in his hand. With a gentle squeeze to your thigh, JJ brought you back to Earth.
“I was just tellin' them here,” he began, leaving his beer aside to scoot closer. “how I'm gonna kidnap you to South America any moment now.”
“Hey.” You forced your breathing to slow down. He didn't need you freaking out now, he needed you to be on your best sane behavior, that's what JJ needed. He needed you. “Jay? Baby, take a deep breath, it's alright.”
“He, um...” JJ's shaky hands reached yours and you shook your head when his fingers curled around your bloody ones in his stomach. “I can't— You—”
“I'm here. It's okay. It's gonna be okay, yeah? You just, you just have to keep breathing. Slowly, like me? Okay?”
Where was everybody?
“And how are you gonna do that?” You forced out, taking a long sip of your beer in a foolish attempt of drowning the memories in your head.
Sarah let out a snicker and Cleo's thick accent scolded somebody but you couldn't bring yourself to the present moment. No, you were still fucking there.
“Pope!” You bellowed now unable to control the shakiness of your hands as they tried to stop the blood. So much blood. So much blood. Why? “John B! Where is— Kiara! Baby, hey, hey!” You used one of your hands to grab his cheek, tilting his head to look at you, his half-lidded eyes showed you how weak he was. You didn't care that his pretty face was smeared with your bloody hands, you had to make him stay awake. “JJ? JJ!”
He blinked with difficulty, gazing up at you. “Hi...” And he had the decency to smile. He smiled! How can someone who has been stabbed smile and it takes your breath away the same away? You never thought you'd see his last smile and you shouldn't even be thinking of that because you both are young and have a whole life ahead of you so why would you be thinking of your boyfriend's last smile?
“Hey.” You cried out. “J, you gotta stay awake for me, okay? I'm getting help. You just have to—”
“I love you.”
Certainly, your whole body froze right at that second. That hadn't been the first time he said it, no. JJ made sure to let you know he loved you thousands of times ever since he said the three little words for the first time. And every time he said it, you felt the warmth of his arms around you, his sunbathed skin against yours and the softness of his lips curling in his favorite spot on your neck after a long day.
That's what “I love you” means when JJ says it.
Except now there was no warmth because he felt cold. Everything regarding him was cold. The kind of coldness a boy with the sun in his smile shouldn't have. There was no smile, not the same smile, at least. There was no life because your favorite boy was saying goodbye and that's what his words meant this time.
Coming back to the bonfire was almost as if a bucket of cold water had been splashed in your face. Your friends had vanished. Nobody was around but you.
“Hey.”
. . . And JJ.
You should've thought he wouldn't have left you alone.
“Hey,” you offered him a half-assed smile. “Where's everyone?”
“Inside.” He mentioned towards the house with a jerk of his head before turning back to you. His cerulean eyes studied your frame for a bit before he let out a sigh, standing up and outstretching a hand in your direction.
You stared at it and him with a raise of your brow. A question.
There was nothing JJ hated more than waiting. So, he didn't wait. He lowered fully to kiss your lips since you were sitting down, enjoying the way they parted in surprise. Stealthily, he wrapped an arm behind your back and beneath your knees and before you could react he pulled you up as if you weighted a penny.
“Jesse James Maybank!”
Oh, he was well aware he was in deep shit when you say that but hell, he missed having a reaction from you that was something other than forced smiles and blank stares.
JJ often caught your unfocused gaze drifting to a random corner, lost inside your head. After Morocco, he noticed that a lot.
“Not the government name, babe.”
“Dude, put me down.”
A gasp. “And now I've been called dude what has this world become!”
He halted near the water, after walking across the beach for a few long minutes with you in his arms. You just stopped fighting, slapping his butt at every step he took.
“You think it's the drums or somethin'?”
“Could be.”
As he sent a look of disapproval your way once he placed you down on your feet, it pulled a laugh out of you.
His fingers — no longer cold — cupped your cheeks and brought you closer. “Do it again.”
“Do what?”
His eyes carried that glint of pure joy mixed with the ocean blue that would get you hypnotized. You just didn't know why this time.
“Your laugh. Haven't heard it in so long.”
Oh.
“That's not true.” You held his wrists just to feel the warmth of his skin when he began caressing your cheeks.
JJ hummed, the sound a gentle protest against your claim. He's come a long way to know your little tells, so he wasn't not easily fooled. With a glance in your way, he knew the hidden meanings.
“Uh, yeah. It is, babe.”
You pulled your hair behind your ears, burying your toes in the sand as you racked your brain to seek an excuse that would work to get you out of that conversation. Any excuse would do, really. But you feared you used all of them since you came back from Morocco. And he knew that.
“Are you ready to talk about it?”
Your throat bobbed as you swallowed down with difficulty.
“Are you?”
“That's not what I asked.”
You finally glanced up, finding him staring forward at the waves, almost distracted. No, not almost. The look in his eyes, you recognize in yourself when drifted back to two weeks ago and the horror took over your mind. It didn't only happen to the two of you, you remember that every time you caught John B outside in the middle of the night, arms behind his head as he stared at nowhere in particular. Or Sarah, when she would crawl up into your bed saying she missed you but you knew exactly what she meant by that. Or Cleo. Oftentimes you needed to force something out of her given everything she went through otherwise she would shove it all in and then never share. Or Pope, because he lost a lot and yes he would never say he hated the whole chasing gold adventure or Poguelandia but he missed safety and a time when you didn't have to worry about danger at your every corner. He's getting used to peace a little more now. Or Kiara, the girl who was a fighter through and through and would choose her friends over anyone in the world, but she needed reassurance once in a while and you all would coddle her a little when you knew it was time for it.
The look.
They all had it. They all suffered through stuff that made them carry it.
And not talking about it made it worse, you told Cleo that once, but since when did you ever take your own advice?
“Yeah, well, Jayj.” You begin, crossing your arms over your chest as the wind picked up. “It happened to you, not to me. It's you who should be ready to talk about it, not me.”
“I remember the blood in your hands, my blood,” JJ still didn't look at you. He was ready to talk about it, not ready-ready but he could accept what happened. That he almost wasn't here. “I remember your voice asking—pleading for me to not close my eyes—”
“Stop.”
JJ finally turned to you, his lips tugging downwards with sadness. “See? It's you who can't talk about it.”
“You almost died in my arms and you expect me to just accept that as if it was a common occurrence?!” It came out as an accusation but in reality you didn't really blame him. He had no fault whatsoever in being stabbed and almost dying. The fault relayed only on the person who caused this torture on all of you. “I can't...” Your voice cracked with newfound emotion. “I can't imagine living in a world where you're not in it, JJ.”
Before he could speak, you cut him off. The dam had broke and now everything you had been hold it in was going to be unleashed.
“You told me you loved me and then you... You stopped breathing.”
He blinked, brows furrowing in thought. JJ knew there was some things he couldn't entirely recall that day, but he didn't remember that.
“I love you.”
If his heartbeat was faint before, now it was non-existent and if felt like the weight of the world had crumbled down on you.
“Open your eyes,” you begged, grabbing his cheeks as a cry of pain left your lips. He was cold. His eyelids shut as if he was sleeping. He was calm. “JJ, open your eyes!” And that's when you felt something touch your shoulder, different hands and voices beside you. All you could focus was on him. “No, c'mon. Jay. Jay? I didn't—” you held his head to your chest, fully sobbing. It was like your heart was being ripped apart. “I didn't say it back.”
Even if she had told him she loved him as many times before, she hadn't say it one last time in time.
You flinched slightly when you were pulled into a pair of arms, fingers reaching the back of your neck to gently press you against a chest. A beating heart welcomed your ears and you didn't realize you were crying until the sobs must've echoed the entire beach.
“I'm sorry, I don't— I don't remember that.”
Your cries were muffled by his shirt. “It wasn't your fault,” you said, your chest tight. “I wish it hadn't gotten to that point cause it was... Fuck.”
JJ tightened his arms around your shoulders, burying his face into your neck. He was still clearly shaken up by what happened, reasonably so. But seeing you like that... He would've take back every decision he made that took your group to that moment just so you wouldn't have to go through that.
He complained when you pulled back a little, drying your tears to glance up at him. Your lips stretching into a timid smile. A real one.
“I'm glad you're okay.” You said with a nod, exhaling as the fog diminished significantly. “I'm happy. But I'm so deeply sorry that I couldn't do more. That I almost let you—”
“Hey, no, no.” JJ was quick to interrupt your train of thought, grabbing your shoulders. “Do not even go there, alright? Absolutely not. Don't even— babe.” He leaned down to connect your foreheads. “You saved my life. All of you. You really think I'd be fine with going... wherever that I wouldn't be able to annoy the shit out of you? I mean— ow!”
You glared at him after punching his forearm though you weren't upset as soon as he gave you his disarming grin that turned your legs to Jell-O.
“You told me you can't imagine living in a world where I'm not in it, right? Well.” JJ brought your hands to his lips, kissing your knuckles as his blue eyes full of life studied you in a serious manner. “I happen to absolutely not want to live in a world without in it either...” He tugged you closer. “It would be boring as hell and that's why I would probably, I don't know, crawl out of whatever grave I was in to tickle your feet during the night.”
“Fuck off.” You groaned with a laugh and he shut you up with a kiss, his hand crawling up on your back to press your closer.
“I can't live without your sounds,” he kissed the edge of your mouth, then moved towards your jaw. “Any of them. I can't live without your smile or seeing your lashes fluttering before you wake up. Or without seeing you when you're pissed at me and you pout the entire time, it just makes me want to kiss you but I know it would earn me a punch in the neck.”
“Yeah it would.”
He chuckled, lifting you so you could wrap your legs around his middle. He held the back of your thighs, thumbs running through your smooth skin.
“Hey.” He said softly, bumping his nose with yours as the waves crashed a few feet away, butting in on your moment. “I love you. And I'm gonna stay in your life for as long as you let me. There will be no stupid rushed goodbyes or near-death experiences that will stop that, alright?” He smiled when you nodded, pressing your lips to his. “Yeah.” He started kissing your whole face then just to listen to the inevitable sound of your laugh again. He could never get tired of it. JJ would crawl out of hell just to hear that sound for the rest of his life.
“And about that South America trip—”
“I'm in.” You said, resting your chin on his shoulder, fingertips scratching his scalp as you stared at the sea. “You can kidnap me to wherever you want.”
His excited laughter echoed in your ears like your favourite song chiming in during a stormy night.
“Oh we're gonna have so much fun.” JJ started rambling on his way back to the house, you in his arms because he refused to put you down. “I'm finally teaching you how to surf! And we can visit all the beaches in Brazil, 'm gonna show you some pictures, it'll be amazin', baby, you'll see.”
“I can't wait.” You mumbled with a kiss to his temple. “Are you just gonna carry me around or...”
“Yes.” He pecked your lips, hands squeezing your waist lightly which earned a proper curse out of you and his usual untamed laugh that you were crazy about. “Just stay put and look pretty.”
You rolled your eyes, wrapping both arms around his neck and didn't complain. Why would you? You had your favorite boy holding you in his arms, rambling about your future plans to South America on his way to your place. You had nothing to complain about.
You just had to get used to getting back to normalcy.
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taglist: @hoeshissworld
#jj maybank x reader#jj maybank x you#jj maybank x fem!reader#outer banks fanfiction#obx season 4#outer banks imagine#jj maybank one shot#jj maybank fanfiction
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