#and idk what to fucking do about that
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okay is she being actually immature or is it just a woman over 30 expressing a human experience you find to be immature.
like yeah. at certain ages... let shit go. im not defending the real immature shit. im not defending the karen you're picturing. i worked in retail i hate those people too. (once somebody got mad at me because she didn't like how our winter window decor was a snowman smoking a pipe. i wish i was joking).
but men at 57 will write books about how 17 year old girls are soooo sexy. they will invent worlds where women have to be naked for "armor reasons." they will write songs that treat women as objects. people rush to defend them. meanwhile a woman at 35 will be like "heartbreak is hard, actually" or "i feel betrayed by a friend" or "i am struggling with something emotionally." immediately people will say stuff like this woman is 35 by the way. by the way this woman is SO OLD to be experiencing this. BY THE WAY.
im 31, almost 32. the other day a poet was blasted online because at her "big age", she had written a poem about feeling unloved. top comment was "this woman is 29 by the way." this woman is too old to still be useful, by the way. she has to behave better . maybe if she was a good wife and mother she could stop existing loudly, and the story could continue on without her. this woman has served her purpose, by the way. she's so cringe, by the way. at 29 - so old! - she still hasn't figured out that her existence should be one of shame.
#what the fuck.#unfortunately by the time i'd switched accounts (from personal to my poetry one)#i couldn't find it :(#this is why u SEND URSELF THE POST. WHICH I KNOW TO DO BUT!!!#i was so mad i just was like “i'm about to tear this commenter in twain” and . lost da post#if u urself are the 29 and got recently flamed by instagram#i love u. come here. write with me. i was about to pick up a sword for u.#i mean a BIGASS sword.#like we all know im a wlw girlie but the way ppl will be like ''id NEVER write sad poetry about a MAN not LOVING me!!!"#..... wowwwww ur so cool. anyway. people often experience emotions regardless of what u consider cringe.#& if ur gonna shame straight/bi women for feeling a certain way. hope u never write about the#weird relationship between u and ur father. or feeling different from ur brother.#or how ur male best friend fucked u over. since it's SO CRINGE. to have ANY feelings caused by a MAN#like be so for real. beloved. nobody is fucking saying this when men do it.#''oh it's cringe to like a woman or feel heartbroken by her.''#controlling women's feelings and actions???? it's more likely than u think.#btw op is nonbinary do NOT be gender essential on this post i'll kill u with my teeth#edit: btw for the person who dm'd me ''when is it misogyny and when is it actually valid''#pretty easy. if a man had done it#would it be cringe? . like if a man sang a sad song about ''she broke my damn heart''?#if he said ''i want to have kids with her'' or something sexually explicit?? like would u even LIKE IT if a male poet had said it?#& if it's like. nah a 35 yr old man being upset about this is cringe too. yeah it's just cringe. that exists. we both know it does.#but .... often i see this ONLY about women. and i can't help but hear like. how back in middle school#we were fed the lie ''girls mature faster.'' ... why do i have to be emotionally regulated? but if a man wrote about the same things?#..... idk . im pretty anti cringe culture to begin with. but this one feels so bad to me . ur still a person past 33.
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Was looking at refs and since Viktor has two different leg braces I was wondering, do we think he wears them simultaneously?? The refs don't perfectly line up perspective-wise so it's hard to tell but parts of the one he wears during the Hexcore scenes look like they could maybe line up with the brace that he wears over his clothes, but also some parts really don't and look like they'd be super uncomfy. Also HOW does he take these on and off. Experts weigh in
#viktor#arcane#ig my assumption would be that he wears both simultaneously cause in the scene where he injects the shimmer#it seems implied that he just threw off his clothes and kept experimenting#so one might assume he was already wearing the smaller one underneath#tho it is a funny image to think of him just being like 'one sec i gotta go all the way home and grab my other brace to do this'#he can take off the back brace too cause hes not wearing it in the scene where he's in the hospital bed and you can see his shoulder#where the strap would be#but that one seems to make even less sense functionality wise#everything looks like its screwed together#or screwed INTO him#but only the top bolts on his spine are i think#in the close ups of his back brace model it looks like theres cushioning underneath the parts of it that cover the rest of his spine#so he can take it off. but HOW#what parts of it unscrew/detatch to pull open and off#does it not do that at all and he just has to shimmy it off his shoulder and all the way down his legs to get it off like a romper#the shape language of the designs are cool but like. tell me how it wooorrkkksss#forgive me if im just dumb and dont know at all how braces work and theres a very simple practical explanation for all this#any king who wants to infodump about mobility aids at me....the floor is yours#something to be said i suppose about the fact that zaunites have crazy prosthetics with wild augmentations that work flawlessly#and piltover's like. idk heres some fucking uncomfortable ass metal. salo gets wheelchair in non ada compliant place#they havent ever needed to adapt to accommodate disabilities etc etc#or maybe artists were just like 'heres a design' and everybody clapped and didnt give it a second thought#and then they just turned off the visibility on the mesh when they didnt need it knowing thered not be a scene where its taken off#dont even wanna THINK about what that rig would look like#like 40 different controllers#soft body and rigid hard surfaces needing to move together....#a cold chill just shot up my spine#<- guy who is only an animator and doesnt know how to rig#forgive the magic wand tool with zero cleanup. i am lazy
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Hot take and not to be a killjoy or the shipping police but people treating Viktor or Jinx's aroace headcanons as if they were canon is not the revolutionary take people think it is.
Headcanons are always all right but we have to acknowledge that they are somehow damaging when they apply to stereotypes. It might not be the case for everyone but most of the time people unconsciously assume that disability/mental illness=asexuality. These headcanons erase the freedom of attraction from people who are already seen as unable to have sexual/romantic experiences/desires, when it's completely untrue and harmful.
You can headcanon Viktor and Jinx as aroace, but I have seen people changing their minds once Viktor is no longer disabled (s2 with all of his other forms) and Jinx is no longer as mentally ill (alternate universe Powder). And it speaks wonders of how people see these characters.
"I never thought about Jinx being able to feel romantic/sexual attraction until s2!" To believe she's actually only capable of that when she's not "damaged" is incredibly disturbing. Especially since Jinx has always had a bit of a flirty personality too.
"I've always seen Viktor as asexual, I don't know why!" That's fine. You can headcanon him as ace. But I believe there is a reason behind it, most of the time, if for some inexplicable reason the "vibes" of the disabled character are making you think he's ace.
I say all of this being aroaspec myself, by the way. Headcanon all you want but going to people's posts commenting how "it's weird for you that they have romantic/sexual plots when they're clearly aroace" is not a win at all. It's a headcanon, after all, and it should be treated as such, and that's fine. But it also is damaging to spread stereotypes like these.
Of course the disabled character is asexual. Of course the mentally ill character is aromantic. It's not as revolutionary as you might think, tbh.
Fandom is not activism and it's all right to have any headcanons you want BUT some of them are filled with damaging stuff and perhaps we should look into ourselves more before treating these assumptions as something canon.
#i hope i didn't sound rude btw i am saying this respectfully and this is directed to the ones who push these hcs as canon#if you have your own theories and know abt aroace stereotypes but are respectful abt it this is not for you keep scrolling#i actually think showing jinx (who has been dehumanized by the fandom A LOT) in a romantic relationship is good for her character#and viktor letting himself be free and loving what he considered imperfections thanks to jayce at the end c'monnn they need to make love#tired of disabled characters being treated as babies and always hc them as aroace let them fuck#this being said i am aware there are more terms inside aroace etc etc etc and there are more ways of considering them aroace etc etc etc#this is NOT about that it's about being aware of how 'mmm it's the vibes!' argument does NOT work when it's stereotypes#it's like saying 'wow this robotic character is giving me autistic vibes idk why' LIKE CMON NOW WEFNEWLFNL YOU KNOW WHY#please don't cancel me i am giving my humble opinion as someone aroaspec#at the end of the day you can do whatever the fuck you want tbh#i'm not the shipping police here#arcane#viktor arcane#jinx arcane#jayvik#timebomb
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something something luigi doesn't remember the final events of spm or dimentio at all after he's defeated (but mario remembers everything)
#super mario bros#super paper mario#smb#spm#dreamyart#i have a lot of thoughts about luigi having amnesia afterward and mario knowing and remembering vividly exactly what happened#like he has vague memories of bleck's crew but just as he knew them as Luigi and not as he knew them as L y'know? plus they're still around#but dimentio is Gone gone and idk maybe his floro sprout sapped his memory of him entirely something like that#i also just think bc dimentio is a weird little interdimensional being he definitely still exists Somewhere#and just wants to torment luigi with visions lol#AND i just think weege has weird vivid dreams anyway thanks dream team can we take this guy to a sleep study#this all severely fucks mario up right like i saw you turn into the antichrist and what do you mean you have no idea what i'm talking about#i saw this little freak brainwash you and force me to fight you. and luigi's just like. Huh. What. No way that happened ur pullin my leg#i dunno i have many thoughts okay byee
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She’s the most like me
#dungeon meshi#aj art#chilchuck#meijack#chilchuck backstory stuff#dungeon meshi spoilers#Sort of ?? Is it?#AHA. Ahah sh shsh sl#sjchdjjfv#THIS TOOK ME SO FUCKING LONNGGGG#I was thinking. About how Chilchuck would feel about Mei doing lockpick work#Since he mentions that and even recommends her to Laios in case he dies#So I was like. Idk I thought that was really interesting#Bc I can’t imagine that his initial response to her career goals was positive#Given his own experiences as an adventurer being so very Bad#Like his ass aged a decade in two years#So I wanted to draw what I thought that initial reaction would’ve been#anywayy
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a redraw of the first drawing i posted here to celebrate the fact that ive been in tumblr for more than a whole year posting my shit and havent deleted my blog in panic yippee \:D/ (mushy rant in tags)
#i realised too late that it has been more than a fuking year (august 9)#and for context: ive had 3 different intagram art accounts and i deleted all 3 of them a few months before creating them. anxiety amiright#here it has been so different bc people are so nice??? it has been a pretty plesant experience here w all of u really#im so glad to have found myself in such a wonderful part of the fandom and amazing mutuals that i never talk to bc im shit w texting#the atention has been overwhelming ngl. i have over 2000 followers which. holy fuck???#it doesnt feel like a real number and for my own sake im nnot gonna treat it as one#like i apreciate the support and ppl liking what i do but im not here to make number go big yk? im here to connect w other humans#and yall have been amazing humans ^^ thank u for all the wonderful tags and comments and the support overall#it has been so cool sharing my art and finding other artist whom i respect oh so very much. some of them even follow me back wtf#i hope to continue being here for as long as i can and keep growing as an artist and sharing that process with other without fear#also my amy redesign actually goes so hard idk why i forgot about it nxnfbcncb#sth#sonic fanart#sonic#amy rose#nov.aart#nov.junk
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Hey. Shakes you by the shoulders. DCxDP where Eobard Thawne is Danny’s cool distant “uncle” that he never sees but always sends in the coolest gifts for the holidays.
~
Danny had grown used to seeing people injured at a surprisingly young age.
He wasn’t injured on the regular, or witness to some sort of extraordinary amount of violence; his parents’ lab was just… very volatile, and they were unprofessionally lax on safety measures on the best of days.
As such, when he saw an unconscious, incredibly injured man wearing some sort of superhero suit in their backyard in the early hours of the morning (he had gotten up to get a glass of water when he heard a thump outside), he didn’t panic, as any young child should have in his situation.
No. Instead, Danny dragged the man inside (with considerable difficulty; despite how thin he was, he was heavy), treated his wounds as best he could (it’s difficult for a child younger than 10 to do stitches, you understand), put a blanket over the man, and went back to bed.
After losing a fight to the Flash and passing out in a random suburban lawn, the last thing Eobard was expecting to wake up to was a small child sitting on the floor in front of him, noisily eating a bowl of cereal.
(He had thought, maybe he would have been found by the Flash and brought to some Justice League holding cell. Or, found by a civilian, and brought to the police. Perhaps, in his feverish state, he had remembered the prison he ended up in from his time, with their brands and chemicals and torturous therapies.)
For some unknown reason, this child had found him, not recognized him as the monster he is (perhaps due to the boy’s age), and helped him—even if his healing factor would have fixed him eventually, having all his parts in the right order certainly sped up the process.
Usually he wouldn’t care for civilians. He’d killed enough that he’d lost count what felt like an eternity ago—and yet, somehow, he felt indebted to this boy. This boy, who had helped him so selflessly, who was so entirely clueless to the evil right in front of him.
This boy, who was all alone in an empty house, whose sister was away, whose parents had gone on a trip and left him behind.
(It didn’t matter the explanation the boy gave for it, Eobard’s mind whispered to itself regardless. Kin. Like calling to like.)
And so, he worked hard to free himself from this debt he had incurred.
He traveled through time, working his way into the family whilst posing as a distant relative. It was remarkably easy; the Fentons didn’t have an incredible memory of their relatives; all he had to do was forge a few papers and mention a few people and he was now “Uncle Eo”.
It was, however, taxing on the mind. These people were absurdly friendly, not to mention talkative. The effort had become a multi-year operation, popping in every now and then for large family gatherings and home visits.
It felt… nice, to be wanted for once. To be noticed in his absence for more than just his status.
To be liked.
He made sure to send the boy a gift on the right holidays, as well as on his birthdays. With his skillset, it wasn’t too difficult to follow him around and see what he liked and wanted. It also wasn’t difficult to spy in when he opened them, to ensure that he had done an acceptable job.
Of course, he couldn’t let this sort of thing cut into his time spent fighting the Flash, so he wasn’t too present. The last thing he wanted was to drag trouble into the boy’s life from his presence.
But then, it happened.
He found out that this boy, and the one known in his time as Phantom, were one and the same.
It was, as a historian, thrilling.
It was, as a villain, horrifying.
In all his travels, he had never intended to involve himself with that mysterious being which shadowed the Justice League. That ghost with the power, in some timelines, to bring about the end of all things.
Of course, he was also capable of doing that, but it isn’t exactly fun to meet someone who’s powers are a match for your own.
Especially if you couldn’t find it in yourself to end him, should he make himself your enemy.
Still, he had a debt to repay, and a boy to look after.
He delivered things to the boy’s room to help him; tactical gloves, a lightweight protective suit, weapons and equipment. All uncredited, since the boy seemed to value the idea of a secret identity.
He took it upon himself to shift the odds in his favor a few times, even; making faster-than-light adjustments to the boy and his combatants during fights to shift the odds in his favor.
Somewhere along the years, he had formed some sort of odd affection for the boy, if he was capable of doing so at all.
And so, when that ghost-boy sought his Uncle Eo out all the way in Central City, carved open and scarred, a distant look in his eyes, he took him in without a second thought.
He would protect this boy, who once had protected him.
#dcxdp#dpxdc#dcxdp crossover#yeah I know Eo probably comes off as creepy and that’s because he is. sorry#he does genuinely care! he’s just actually unwell and has an unnerving way of showing it#this is what affection looks like to him. extreme stalking followed up by kindness related to said stalking#the flash finding out eo has essentially domesticated himself by caring for a child: hey. what#‘very happy you’re doing this! but. um. what’#I think eobard would find out about Dani and take it very normally#and not be insane about the genetically altered child who was cast aside for being imperfect#I think he would take that situation very well#flash and eo fighting before an alarm goes off on Eo’s suit and he just goes ‘hey I have to pick up the kid from school.’#‘we can finish this later’ and speeds off while flash malfunctions because HUH WHUH#WHAT FUCKING KID. YOU HAVE A KID?? ITS YOURS???? DID YOU STEAL IT#anyways dani and eobard duo should be called planned obsolescence#idk what danny and eobard duo would be called sorry
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idk, i just feel like if your primary argument against transandrophobia/antitransmasculinity theory is that you think it's transmisogynistic you're not being intellectually honest. who does it hurt when trans men and mascs coin a term to describe the intersection of transphobia and sexism as it most frequently affects them? because it does hurt trans men when they're told that they're not entitled to speak on the discrimination they themselves face.
what I'm hearing from people who oppose the antitransmasculinity movement is that transmisogyny is when trans men talk about their problems 👍, but obviously that's not true. i know that's not true. you know that's not true. so then what is the issue? genuinely, enlighten me. you want trans men to shut up and listen? I'm listening.
#transandrophobia#anti transmasculinity#trans#transgender#maybe whacking a hornets nest but I'm really frustrated#it just makes no sense#how one can in the same breath be upset by tmascs “derailing” discussions about tmisogyny to discuss their own issues#and then also condemn tmascs for creating their own space specifically to discuss their issues#so as not to step on the toes of the (minority group of) transfems who insist our very existence is owed to them#as though we have not literally existed just as long#pedestalizing an already hypervisible group#vs shutting down a historically hypovisible group#effectively doing the terfs' work for them by dividing us when we should be one another's strongest allies#how is that fair to either of us#this does not help trans women#if you think it is you're lying to yourself idk !#antitransmasculinity#transemasculation#<- fucking hate that term btw#miss me with that shit#that's not what this is at all#transphobia#transmisandry#transandromisia#transandrodorks#transandrobro#tmra#<- tagging these because i do in fact want the people who use these terms derogatorily to see this post#i will not be debating anyone i just want to see what people have to say i guess
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good morning sifloop nation
#loop is so fucking hard to draw bc I can never tell how I can center the face on their cookie cutter as head#its literally just a pair of eyes and yet it fucks with me every time 😭#idk what came over me bc suddenly im imagining these two freaks in the funniest scenarios for my own pleasure#im not even halfway thru the game yet im still on act 2 bc I havent been able to play it in a while#genuinely though I am curious as to how ppl would go about describing how u would kiss loop. this isnt even a jab at anyone#in fact I admire whoever pushed their imagination to the limits to find a way to make loop kissable in ways science cannot explain#and other fun activities#I think itd be funny for them to do 7 minutes in heaven bc normally 2 ppl go in to smooch or whatever in the closet#in their case two of them go in but only one of them comes out alive. bc theyre like that#are they fighting or are they fucking. the answer is up to you#sifloop#myart#my art#in stars and time#isat#isat fanart#isat loop#isat Siffrin#Siffrin#loop#doodles#shitpost
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thinking about not only the specific people lucanis pulls in to represent the 'locks' in his psyche, but the storytelling that happens in the structure/order of them. the underlying ideas are presented something like:
the lucanis who went into the ossuary never came back out again; he died down there (the boy caterina raised is gone forever) -> you're putting yourself in danger doing this (by being close to me), you should leave because I can't bear it if you get hurt because of me -> it doesn't matter even if we do try this, it won't work anyway (again because of me) ('you know what he's like, you can open the door but he won't walk through it' :'( oofie doofie) -> what if the real secret is that there was never anything but the monster in here from the beginning. you should leave, there was never anything here worth saving in the first place. (implicitly: what if I deserved what happened, all along.)
it runs pretty cleanly from outward-oriented attachment anxiety ('caterina won't even want me back like this, she won't recognize me (the same way I no longer recognize myself)) and gradually deeper inwards until we reach self-image and self worth. or you know, the harrowing basic lack of it lol.
"careful -- they'll know we're not right," spite says in one of their first scenes... but clearly, some very deep part of lucanis has feared or suspected for much longer than that that there's something inherently not right at the core of him, way before any demon entered the picture. and the voice he gives those lines to is the person who should know him better than anyone in the world, who he has loved more than anyone in the world -- and who deliberately chose to hurt him so horrifically anyway. 'It's better if I'm just a monster and deserved what happened than it is to allow for the idea that the brother I love doesn't really exist and maybe never did'. it's better if he's fundamentally flawed in some way that needed fixing to help him survive, and that's why caterina chose to hurt him again and again -- out of love. (this one I think he might have a very sad wakeup call on one day if he ever ends up with the responsibility and care of a child of his own in some way and realizes just how alien the idea of ever intentionally hurting them for any reason is to him. oh buddy. also interesting that he keeps caterina as the outermost lock -- there IS a distance he keeps there that he hasn't with illario. he doesn't resent her 'anymore' he says, but he also keeps her carefully further away from his deepest self.)
as far as I could tell the only note in the mind prison that's fully hidden and needs to be uncovered is the sad painful helpless stupid little truth that even after all this, even knowing what happened... he still loves his brother. is there anything illario could ever do that would make lucanis completely stop loving him, do you think? sometimes the trouble with unconditional love is that it is, well. unconditional, even when some terms and conditions probably would have been in order haha.
that's the pattern you see there again and again; he would rather destroy and abandon and imprison himself at every turn than let go of love, even when it's just scraps, even when there's only ever enough of it to hurt him. it's only when rook shows up and as it were takes his hand and walks along with him that he can entertain the idea of changing the story of what walking out the door might mean in the end.
#tl;dr the demon is a metaphor about dissociation and trauma and it's doing its job thematically fucking pitch perfectly that way the end#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#lucanis dellamorte#dragon age meta#this mission is like ds9 the wire in terms of episodes you really can examine from a thousand different angles#and find something new and soulcrushingly sad every time. exactly my kind of episode in other words#whenever people say there's nothing to him but coffee and spite jokes some small part of me goes 'oh I'm so incredibly sorry!#it must be really hard and so impractical to go through life without being able to read :'( get better soon'#is that very nice of me. perhaps not. is the writing here *perfect*? of course not. but some people are also dedicated to being#wilfully blind (presumably b/c they would have preferred to see something else?? idk man)#lucanis' reaction to taash going 'I'm sorry I'm such a bad crow :'('... he could NEVER do what caterina did with him no matter what#you just can't use him like that. he needs the clean family/enemy/contract distinction or you just break him!!!#caterina literally what are you thinking. every day I ask myself this. (probably 'the only other option that keeps the seat in the family#is illario. so that's right out of course' lmao)#god forbid it happen anytime soon if it should happen b/c there's Stuff that needs working through first lol but he'd be such a soft dad
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the whole "jason rules crime alley and none of the other bats are allowed there!!1!" thing is so funny like. tim LITERALLY lives in the theater where bruce's parents died,
#rimi talks#sorry. thought about tim doing that again. what is WRONG with him kfjshakjdshfkjd#WITHOUT EVEN TELLING BRUCE UNTIL AFTER HED ALREADY DONE IT TOO.#TIMOTHY. WHY.#this is the other thing abt why i just dont like seeing jtodd in fanwork#whenever he appears like 99% of the time its in a way that is directly contradictory to actual comics#the 1% of people who actually read the comics and write him in such a way? fine great awesome!!#however i still am filtering that bitch out because hes kind of a catch-all for the most annoying batfanon tropes.#because. yknow. theres no other tags to filter out bc they dont Fucking tag it#alas. oh well. anyways can we go back to going hey tim what is wrong with you#because for real i think he got off way too easy for this one.#forget identity reveals i want the core four sleepover where tim's apartment gets its lore reveal#give me cassie doing such a dramatic spit take that she gets ice cream on the ceiling. picks up tim like a weasel. and goes WHY???#and hes just like. idk seemed like the right thing to do :)#tim
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I was lied to. I thought that the cup bros were twins but it turns out they AREN’T, so the entire reason I even drew these sketches in the first place has now been rendered SUPERFLUOUS.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/0749325dfb228cddc1b74a3395b8f4ff/e51c1e64c4c4d33d-53/s540x810/ba16ae3d50ce0c918c27fa1ce6855c0fd380cf6c.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/114b3aee0f1b7cdb1f0d65ee492759b1/e51c1e64c4c4d33d-27/s540x810/38b73a5edf1fd838b8a54fde13c676ee37fe02af.jpg)
#my art#gravity falls#gravity falls ford#gravity falls stanley#stan pines#ford pines#stanley pines#stanford pines#cuphead#mugman#crossover#ALSO#I recently learned that the cup brothers are canonically 18 and I am in denial about it#THOSE CHICKPEAS LOOK LIKE THEY BELONG IN ELEMENTARY SCHOOL#WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN THEY ARE LEGALLY ADULTS#I THOUGH THEY WERE LIKE 8?? OR 10 OR SMTH IDK
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Listen I’m not saying that *I* have the balls to buy a reflective vest and go off on a roadside or retention pond somewhere and start fucking around guerrilla gardening
But I am saying that the past week I’ve driven past many MANY people in reflective vests either doing roadwork or maintaining roadside shrubbery or whatever and the amount of times I considered questioning what the fuck they were doing is zero and the amount of times I would’ve even had the TIME to question what the fuck they were doing is zero
I saw groups of people I saw someone solo I didn’t question it I just figured ‘eh they’re doing SOMETHING and carried on. Depending on the location you pick, anyone who WOULD Karen up and interrogate you won’t even have the time space or ability to
#out of queue#ani rambles#guerrilla gardening#the only thing I could see being a problem is if someone who actually is like a coordinator for city management stuff seea you and goes#‘wait what the fuck no ones supposed to be doing shit around here today’#and even then like. idk. what are they gonna do.#i would feel like a hypocrite telling people ‘oh 100% go do this right now’#because as previously stated not even i have the balls to do it#but it is something im thinking about lately#like. how much can a reflective vest/jacket really cost.#you could probably find em wholesale. or on amazon
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while teen while goblin while aroace while injured while doing your best
#fantasy high junior year#fhjy#riz gukgak#figueroth faeth#sklonda gukgak#dimension 20#this. mmmmhhh this is so. I did Not know how to draw this really.#I am very normal about riz (<- lying)#it's a brennan-dm d20 campaign the bad guy is always capitalism (I am saying this with clenched teeth)#riz out of all of them being aroace fucks with me SO bad. bc its also established that elmsville specifically and probably the#majority of solace is not. made for goblins. and that becomes sklonda being worked to the bone and pok dying on the job#and riz spending all his time trying to keep his friends together. maybe to the point of it being injurous#like. do u get what I mean. its an economy of time it takes your time it eats up your time#not just the gukgaks but everyone you have to spend time to get to live and you don't have a lot of time left in a day#and you have to spend it carefully. you have to prioritize#you're somewhere without an established community and companionship is bought with your time spent working#this place doesn't take care of you. at the end of the day who do you have who'd prioritize you. do you understand me#the evolved aroace loathing where if your friends and family are granted more time nobody would have to choose. we live in a society#holds ur hand we live in a society. idk if Im making any sense#anyway . uhhh riz is my favourite that's my statement thank you for listening. au revoir
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Curly's little blurb on his steam trading card just keeps reminding me he is a much more miserable person than people realize.
We don't get a lot of his thoughts, inner confliction that aren't bogged down by what Jimmy says or does. Even in the The Last One and Then Another, his dialogue is reflective, not the Curly before the crash but the result of everything. Parts of the him he was are there of course, but also disfigured and warped beyond recognition just like he is physically.
Curly really doesn't think much of himself and desires. He clearly chases fleeting moments of happiness. He doesn't really have prospects for himself, assumes in a similar way to Swansea, that if it should make it happy then he is happy. Though, he hasn't reached the point Swansea did to admit it doesn't. He neither sees the glass half full or empty, it's just water, something he needs and he'll take it from any perspective.
He wasn't running from anything but he's never really been going towards something either. He's listless. I've been using the term complacent to describe how he feels about his life and the closest people (really just Jimmy) in it, but now that word feels too neutral, too nice. Happier than Curly really was. There isn't just one word for it, he's unfulfilled, uncertain, uninspired. There are no active problems he faces and that's the issue, why should he be upset?
I believe he really is a person who doesn't know who he is or wants to be. He follows a structure. I don't think he's suicidal, but he clearly doesn't think about what makes him happy. He's numb. I suppose that is a better word than complacent, used to the feeling even if he hates it. It doesn't hurt so why stop it?
#like curly is very much does his job goes home takes care of self repeat i dont think hes like an asocial person but he doesn't take the tim#time to indulge in himself the way he thinks hes a bigger picture guy so as long as nothing is disrupted hes relatively okay even if its#slowly chipping away at him and making him feel hollow like he thought space was endless that he could never reach a point of feeling finis#he never had to predict what to do after the end and suddently he realizes there was no end to it because there cant be an end to nothing#hes accomplished so much objectively but hes done nothing with his life outside of his work like he mentions no hobbies other friends or an#thing of the sort he doesn't even feel like he can vent it cause what? hes complaining about how hard it is to get promoted to have securit#in a job you hate and a position that keeps weighing you down like I feel like if he explained himself at the party and didn't let Jimmy t#talk for him hed actually have made points the others would get cause even if they envied his position he still is justified in being unhap#not everything that you think would bring you happiness does or fulfills even a small part of that desire#idk hes a lot more fucked in the head but like towards himself than people realize like how he lets Jimmy treat him is indicitive of that i#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#captain curly#curly mouthwashing
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kitamoto does make me so emotional. natsume says some embarrassingly earnest shit that reveals how undersocialized he is and kitamoto's reaction is to spend more time with him and introduce him to friendship. when someone who appears to be a girl his age tells him she's never read a book before, he's like oh okay, and then the next day he gives her a book with easy-to-read stories in a genre she said sounded interesting. he not only doesn't judge people but he also actively meets them where they're at...i love this sweet teenager so much i could cry.
#he's like huh. what a weirdo. i'm going to respect the shit out of them#he and nishimura taught natsume how to ride a bike. remember that? because i do.#natsume is like will i ever be able to tell him about the youkai? and idk if he means youkai in general or specifically kaeda#but either way. kitamoto would be the absolute chillest person to tell. he's so accepting. even if he thought it was natsume's delusions#he would just like. be so fucking supportive ah goddammit i'm gonna cry again#natsume's book of friends#natsume yuujinchou#kitamoto atsushi#my posts#f
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