#and idk maybe ive just seen night of the living dead one too many times
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fucked up that they don’t put radios in boomboxes anymore
#years and years ago i had this really nice hello kitty one that played cds casettes and it had radio#now u just get cd and aux. if ur lucky#and like u used to be able to get radio on ur ipod too#now? u gotta download a radio app and u can only play stations that stream online too#like dont get me wrong i love radiogarden#but from a more practical pov#what if theres a disaster#what if theres no wifi#isn't it in everyones best interest to have a radio around to keep up to date on whats going on??#i hate to go all ''kids these days'' but i KNOW they arent going out and buying radios#and idk maybe ive just seen night of the living dead one too many times#but disasters do happen in real life too!!#sorry bout all that its bc i was in the car earlier#and i flipped to preset seven which usually doesnt come in#but it did and it was playing the kim possible theme song#and i was like. WHAT station is this??#and it wasn't coming in real good so i couldnt understand what the dj was saying#but i made sure to remember the call number to look it up when i got home#well. no such station??#so i figure its probably close to the number i had saved#but i can't check rn bc i don't have a radio in my room :/
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hey. hey you. I’m way too nervous to leave an actual comment on it but the rain world fic you posted recently. Fucking slaps. It’s so good. Idk how to put it into words but it’s like you make the characters so clear and and…idk but I think your fic is so cool and good. AND I DONT EVEN RAIN WORLD IS SUPPOSED TO BE. I came in through PAFL but I’ve been curious about rw for a while now, and this has made me want to check it out even more. Also, take your time on the swap au!! Stay healthy(physically AND mentally. They both matter) and don’t burn yourself out! Always remember that you are priority #1, and that your needs should always come first. Alright that’s it bye :D
AWAWA!!!! wawawwaaa!!!! explodes and diessssss ..n"!!! thanke you!!! thank you:3!!!!! your kind words are always so!!! nice and cool!!! and a pleasure to receive!!! <3333 rain world my good friend rain world... its a game for sure!!! ive been engaging less w the fandom lately, but, i still rlly like the game:3 ive been into it for. checks steam achivements. like two years now (i got into pafl not long after i think) !! rain world has these thangs tho - slugcats! :) the link leads to my rw pafl au... i have. SO Many pafl aus. you dont even Know. i havent even posted half of them. you dont know about my wandersong pafl au. you dont know about my buddy sim pafl crossover. you dont know about my pathologic pafl au (yet) (>:3). and thats because i never draw anything for them ❤️might write smth tho... ..
mm . youre rlly cool. thank you again!!! for your support!!! as a thank you, heres what ive got so far for the next chapter of swap! its not much, and mostly just first draft, but! just for you ❤️the '*' signal words/sentences im gonna italise
It’s another day. Just like always.
Half-asleep, Yura glances at the door, halfway through his breakfast. His mother’s standing there. She’s already fully dressed, while her son is still in last night’s clothes. He hasn’t had much energy as of late. It’s not like he ever has any energy, even more as of late, with the trip to the zone coming up... Not to mention everything that’s happened with Dmitry.
Yura grunts at the thought of that… *monster.
Why didn’t he stick around? Maybe he’d have been able to convince Sergei to let him stay, or at the very least, not report him. Maybe he could have helped Dima escape. Maybe he could have seen the police coming and warned him. Maybe if he had used his brain, he’d have told Sanya to let Dima stay at his place and avoided all of this. But, no amount of *maybes is going to change the fact that he’s gone. Dead, maybe, for all they know.
The door clicks shut. He’s alone now. Anya is either at school (Is there school today? What day is it?) or, more likely, at Olya’s right now. She probably won’t be back for some time. Yura will be all by himself until then, getting swallowed up by unnecessary feelings.
… Whatever. He only knew him for a week. He shouldn’t care. His eyes shouldn’t sting at the memory of the guy. It doesn’t matter that Yura wasted so much time and money helping him out. Feeding him, giving him a place to stay, hanging out with him even though he was *such a pain in the ass.. But none of that matters now. Never will matter, because he’s gone. The only thing that matters is that he- *it, Yura corrects himself - killed a few people in Sergei’s flat.
… Well, not really people. Not ones that matter, anyway. Three or so cops. Blew up their heads, Sanya said, that it looked like that’s what happened. Yura got the feeling she didn’t tell him more than she had to during their phone call. It was clear that she wasn’t pleased with how things turned out. Maybe she was hoping Sergei could help Dima. Let him live with them. Find some place for him to stay, at least.
Yura can’t find the strength to not blame her for this. The rational side of him argued that she was the *least to blame, actually, she didn’t know this would happen. Most likely, she didn’t even know that Dima’s a mutant. Still. Though the final nail in his (hopefully only metaphorical) coffin was decided by Sergei, *she took Dima to him. She should have known.. but, how could she have? There was no way for her to know.
A frustrated groan escapes the teen. There’s really no need to be thinking that much about him. About *it.
He groans again, frustrated by his inability to call Dmitry what he is. It’s not like he didn’t know the truth all along, either. Again, he internally reprimands himself for getting attached. Sanya isn’t to blame here- no, she’s not the one responsible for all of this. Maybe for getting him reported so quickly, but that was always going to happen, one way or another. Better soon than later, the teen thinks. Before he let that not entirely uncomfortable feeling grow more than it already has.
Before he can ponder this any further, his phone buzzes. With one hand, he rubs his eyes, with the other he picks up his phone.
*We need to talk, a message from none other than Mr Kazarin himself. The tone of the message makes him sound like he wants to break up, Yura thinks to himself. Funny. Maybe it is one. Yura runs a hand through his hair, staring at the message. His stalker times are over before they even started, his only hope at making it in this godforsaken world, all because of that.. *thing. Nothing he can say could fix this.
Luckily, before he can ruin Sergei’s view of him any further, another message. An invitation, if one can call it that, to meet up at an unimportant location. It’s not like he has much choice in this - so, he sends back an *ok, gets dressed in his unitidy clothes and heads out.
—
something something sergei angst
“You know what this is about.” Sergei proclaims. Yura doesn’t need to reply for him to know he’s right, but he still does, accompanied by a dry chuckle. “‘Course I do. It’s about Dimochka.”
“*Don’t call it that.”
The air is thick with tension. Despite this, Yura nonchalantly holds a cigarette out to him. Like nothing’s happened- like this is just a regular training session. With a sigh, he takes the cigarette, and with one quick motion, he takes out his lighter. Yura is fiddling with his own.
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On Love
So as you know I made this uquiz with an open-ended question at the end, tell me something about love, and I’ve gotten the most wonderful responses! They range from descriptions of wonderful partners:
Lauren: oh, how long I went without being myself until I met him and he showed me who I truly was and that my worth was higher than I ever thought was possible
Levi: I love who we are with each other. I love who I am with you. In your company I am me. In your company I am the best of me. The best with the best, I've told you. I wouldn't give you up for anything
Daniel: i fell in love for the first time when i was 17... at the time, i didn’t realize it was the first time, i thought i’d been in love before, a couple times actually, but falling in love at 17 was such a fulfilling experience, it felt so forceful yet so right. it’s when i first truly understood what love was. never before had i felt so understood and so cared for as i did when i was in love with her, and she was in love with me. it’s been nearly 4 years since then, and nearly 3 years since we broke up and stopped talking, and still, i think about her almost every day. i’ve never known anyone like her; to me, she was love itself.
El: oh i’m in love with everyone that i know op!!! especially my girlfriend, of course ,but also my friends and my family and random people on the street and uh
Grace: i’ve met my soulmate and we plan on getting an apartment and marrying after college
A: I’m going to ask the woman I love to marry me and I just wanted to tell someone because I am so excited
Jeremy: you ever have that feeling where basically after years of denying that someone couldnt understand you in a way or love you and then the next thing you know you happen to find that person and its just great from then on out? idk how to explain it anyways I love my boyfriend so much he means the world to me
Lucy: i am so happy i have found the one i love
to descriptions of best friends and favorite people:
Nightbyrd: Love is a hug from an alzheimer's patient who hasn't the foggiest idea who you are, but they know you're worth hugging.
H: I have been doing so much yoga with my roommate recently!! It's a great way to center my mind for an hour
Riv: [platonic] i’ve literally never met anyone who understands me in the way that my best friends do. they’re literally the best people in the whole world and i genuinely don’t know what i’d do without them. i love them with my whole heart
Cillian: when i talk about how much i love my best friend i get so teary eyed because i cant believe that such a genuinely wonderful person wants to speak to me every day - i care for her more than anyone else on this planet
O: my two besties are my sources of happiness and they’re so pretty i would die for them :D
to beautiful quotes:
Kai: "you have bewitched me, body and soul, and I love, I love, I love you. I never wish to be parted from you from this day on." DARCYYYY PLS MY HEART CANT HANDLW THIS PAIN
Dorian: When the plane went down in San Francisco, I thought of my friend M. He’s obsessed with plane crashes. He memorizes the wrecked metal details, ____the clear cool skies cut by black scars of smoke. Once, while driving, he told me about all the crashes: The one in blue Kentucky, in yellow Iowa. How people go on, and how people don’t. It was almost a year before I learned that his brother was a pilot. I can’t help it, I love the way men love. (accident report in the tall, tall weeds- ada limon, bright dead things)
Adam: every day I think about lemony snicket I will love you if I never see you again I will love you if I see you every Tuesday or however it goes. and it KILLS ME. love only fits in small things
Hero: “Your heart beats in my ribs and mine in yours, and both in God’s… The divine magnet is in you, and my magnet responds.” - Herman Melville to Nathaniel Hawthorne
Mary: "Love is watching someone die."
Alex: "meet me at blue diner, i'll take coffee and talk about nothing baby"
Sparrow: "How dare you love me like you've never known fear?" and "For you, the world," and "Darling, I was born to press my head between your shoulder blades," and "Will you start where I end?"
V: " You want to die for love. You always have. " and "someone will remember us, I say, even in another time" are living rent free in my mind 24/7 and I'm shaking. When will I finally be not the only one falling ?
Sahar K: To love another person is to see the face of god!!!
Miriam: all the love in the world is useless when there is total lack of understanding- kafka
Juls: Don’t you think they are maybe the same? Love and attention
to practices of love:
Leo; i love feeling happy bc somebody that i love is happy and comfortable....like its not about me i just love seeing you smile. we are safe together...idk i just feel it bro
A: I like to think love is leaning on each other during the light or dark days. Its a personal mission of mine to find out who I am and what I want. Yet I never seem to find my place in this world and as I look and look , I realise the only place I can be myself even with or without the efforts to find myself was done on that day or not, I am always tired so shall I lean on you? And you can lean on me as well. I shall be your fig tree and you shall be my favourite willow tree.
L: It's too late at night to be soul searching, but it's a journey we all seem to find ourselves on these days.
Anthi: feeling safe and at home, I guess (also I love frogs)
Julia: ive found that loving someone is like becoming your own thesaurus. you have to find or come up with infinite ways to say, you’re beautiful, or, i love you. it’s a gift
Galexies: ive been writing letters to the person i'd love one day since i was 14. i write them in a little journal usually, but i've been digitizing them into emails and sending them to one account that i'll give to them someday. i'd like to put pictures, but i haven't been outside much recently so theres that. i wonder if they'd like the sunsets i have on file, or if they'd find my cat cute in a bowtie.
Caeles: Love is sharing fruit slices and making someone tea at random
Dundy: Love is sending your friends cursed shit and watching them react in horror
to crushes and potential loves:
Jess: I have a crush on my roommate. It sucks, but it's also wonderful. I get to be around him all the time when we're at school. we share a life together; it's rather domestic. I think a lot about marrying him and being domestic with him forever. It won't happen, and I'll move on eventually, but I'll be happy with him for as long as I can. I hope you feel loved tonight, because you are. Sleep well.
Aki: I so desperately want to believe that love is fake because I’ve seen what happens when loved ones leave but whenever I start to convince myself that I’ll never love anyone my best friend messages me telling me she loves me. She’s the only person I’ve ever pictured having a future with but love scares me and I don’t really know what to do but I think as long as she’s with me in some way, I’ll be fine
Hi: her her i keep thinking abt her.... gonna see her in 8 days or so i really miss her. its ok if shes never gonna love me like i want her to really being her friend spending time with her makes me the happiest girl on earth.... outsold antidepressants
Kit: this guy i have a crush on has hypnotically dark brown eyes and he's wonderful and shows me kindness like no one else
Juno: my crush has all the stars in his eyes
Mads: When I have the courage to meet my eyes with hers, the world stands still
Be Nice To Me: Look bro I never do these but I am yearning to hold them SO badly right now and someone needs to know it besides me
to the trials of love:
Pppppp: I just wanna love like from the movies and what I read about.. but everyone tells me that that’s fictional and rare to find in the real world and it sucks bc it seems like all the guys I’ve met are terrible and the norms of society are all about not respecting women and uthdjdjdk
Manny: I have been in love before and I will be again but I’m not now and I miss it
Ok: I don't think I've ever been in love, though I love many people. I am waiting for the day I look at someone and can say, YES. IT'S YOU.
Chloe: idk rn i'm like okay with my love and i'm happy so we'll see i'm just a little cautious rn bc my last partner told me i didn't know how to love
L: love is so fucking complicated I don't even know where to start
Corrin: He’s not real and it worried me that I will never allow myself to live or be loved because I will always be waiting for him
Sean: Good luck it dont exist
Serena: i want 2 b in love :(( </3
13: I don’t know anymore
M: I just really don’t like dealing with it lol
to beloved characters:
Janaya: I’m madly in love with my comfort and kin character and I hope maybe in the afterlife I can relive a life with him in some sort of dimension
Jhgjdf: when i was a kid i had a crush on ash ketchum from pokemon and id always daydream about being a female pkmn trainer and meeting him and we fall in love
to advice and prose:
Mikolai: Love is earth, gentle and soft at first flight but upon being broken, drowns you in the dry choking wastes of its consequences...
Thex: Your hands will not go cold without someone to hold them. I am here. I will be here.
Kat: it is the nearest proof to god that i find myself surrounded by people who love in a way that complements so wonderfully the way i love
H: believe in love out of spite believe in love to prove everyone wrong believe in love because you were told not to and we will not do what we’re told anymore believe in love because it’s the strongest act of teenage rebellion we have left believe in love because it’s easier not to and when is easy worth doing? believe in love because everything says otherwise but you are untouchable, you are your own, you are not made by their design believe in love because, perhaps, you are love
Ali: I used to want a kind of love that feels like coming home and now I want nothing more than to be away from home on many different adventures
Em: you dont need to love yourself to accept it from others
to the small, the simple, and the sweet:
Ireal: Poems
O: Flowers
Fay: ah im sorry that i’m feeling unmotivated but you are very kind.
Ad: we love LOVE
A: <3
Isak: small things
H: intense
Hey: Listening to a clock ticking away
S: her
E: <3
Hania: Amorous, I adore that word ^^
Catboy: wholesome
J: i love love so much it hurts
Emmy: hi i love the song darkest of discos!! try and give it a listen!! <3
Nora: Love is painful, but most of the time love is great
Ariel: i like the comfort it can bring
M: i love love
to food!
Cool Whip: Matzoh ball soup!!
Woop: I love sausages.... I hope that's ok with you?
and animals too <3
Nee: hmm i have pet geckos and i love them very much!
96: raccoons ????
DJ Big Penis: cats
:3: I Love frogs,,, love is stored in the frog,,,
I hope that this serves as a sweet compilation of what love means! Love to all of you, it warms my heart so much to hear about your people and your geckos and your characters and soup and all the songs and quotes you love. <3 Strength to all of you who are figuring out to do about your feelings for your crush, and congratulations to you who are proposing or moving in with your person! Your words are a source of light to me, truly.
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recounting the entire avengers: endgame movie, which i only saw once when it came out, from memory
because i just took the SAT and i want to do anything except think about that so get ready for a fun ride full of holes and my reenactments of scenes and quotes that i remember from however many years it’s been now since endgame came out. buckle the fuckle up
movie opens, clint’s whole ass family fucking dies. cue killing spree fueled by grief and anger. HashTag Relatable
tony is floating through space with nebula and teaching her how to play paper football
holy shit is this how tony dies
“pep” ouc h
oh hey he’s home, dope
The Gang (tm) learns where thanos’s farm is somehow i can’t really remember
“perhaps i judged you too harshly”
“???? thor????” “what? i went for the head”
“five” five what?? days?? weeks??? months???? oh boy i can’t wait to find ou- “years later” HUH???????
steve looks the exact same, so i guess he kept up that workout schedule even through the snap. i mean good for him honestly
and is also running a talk therapy group like sam did
a single smidgen of gay representation but it’s a good start ig
i don’t really remember what everyone else was doing, i just know that tony and pep have morgan now but idk if that gets revealed now or later
the only reason we had a movie is because of a rat. everyone say thank you to Rat for releasing scott lang, please. round of applause
scott’s daughter is all grown up and catch me sobbing over the fact that he wasn’t there to see it
somewhere in here nat is crying and eating a sandwich and honestly girl same
“hey!!! it’s me!!!! scott lang!!! ant man???? also what the hell happened???? lemme IN”
cue scott lang having a single brain cell and bringing up time travel. i think it was him that proposed the idea. maybe not. but imma give him credit
oh yeah bruce and hulk are besties now and bruce is just permanently Like That
and cue everyone being shook at the idea of time travel
time to go see Science Man at his house on the lake
“i wish you had come for anything else.” ouch
gang leaves dejectedly
peter. that’s it. and suddenly tony is all hands on deck
cue science mumbo jumbo in the middle of the night while he eats something out of a bag that i can’t remember
“shit!!” “sHiT!!!” “NO”
“i love you 3000″
Science Man reveals that he has, indeed cracked the code to literal time travel
cue nat, the only person with an umbrella, going to find clint who is busy with murder, as he does
“don’t do that. don’t give me home” stfu budapest man and get in the car.
thor has. enlargened. and is now playing fortnight with korg as a means to cope with what happened plus losing loki, as i think we all would
The Gang is back together and working (surprisingly) coordinately and throwing ideas around and it’s actually very cute. and it makes my heart very happy. and i want to cry every time i think about it because we all know what comes next
scott’s taco gets blown away. bruce gives him another. all is well in the world
and in this exhibit we see the only brain cell in the whole group, which is being used by rhodey at all times
“why don’t we just,,,, (choking motion)” “to a BABY???”
during the time tests someone gets reverted to a baby but i don’t remember who and it’s highkey disturbing
“i consider this an absolute win!!”
cue slo mo walk with the cool white time suits that everyone looks so good in
“see you in a minute” that smile. she looks so happy. sobbing
i think it’s in here that all the color go through steve’s eyes, so let’s just take a minute to acknowledge how pretty he is
“just for the record, that suit did nothing for your ass.” “i don’t remember asking you to look”
“that’s america’s ass.” yes it is scott you’re absolutely right
“i cOuLd dO tHiS aLL dAy” “yeah i knoOoOW”
time for tony to give tony a heart attack and then just stare in what i can only assume is amusement. i’m pretty sure that comes after america’s ass but maybe not
somewhere in here steve is just staring at peggy through blinds and it’s sad when you see it but when you think about it afterwards, it’s so funny for no reason
time to get whacked by a very angry hulk who was not allowed to use the elevator
“NO STAIRS”
tony goes flying. so does the tesseract. loki, in handcuffs, is like “oh bet this is mine now” and. Leaves.
i’m pretty sure it’s bruce who goes and gets schooled by The Ancient One on the multiverse, and i say it’s bruce because i think he’s the only one out of The Gang who could ever actually wrap his head around it
i don’t remember exactly how they get the tesseract but they do
thor and rocket are in asgard and thor has a panic attack, as I think we all would if we had to talk to our dead mother and pretend like we don't know what's going to happen
and remember kids, slapping someone is not the way to handle a panic attack. anyways
a mother always knows
"i'm still worthy!!!!" you always were, thor. you never stopped being worthy
and we have our hammer back
cue sobbing on vormir
“clint. it’s ok. it’s ok.” that smile.
nat’s fucking dead and i’m fucking dead inside let’s keep this party goin
other stones are recovered and i don’t really remember how but hey we got all six
“where’s nat?” cue more sobbing from me and from clint as you can see each and every team member’s heart drop to the fucking floor. especially steve
yeah maybe we’re doing this for half the universe and all the people we lost, but mostly for nat now
tony’s makeshift infinity gauntlet has entered the chat
Green Man is the only one who can physically take the power of the stones, so the fate of literally everything they have ever done up to this point is on him
snap rest in peace bruce’s arm
cue every single person in the theater holding their breath
“guys. it worked.”
cue explosion as their facility gets bombed and i am terrified that it has killed the entire gang
but it obviously has not and i am once again a Class A Idiot
i can't remember if it’s steve or tony who wakes up first but one shakes the other awake and is like “get the fuck up bitch idk what just happened but we got a problem”
everyone is mostly fine. but they’re all alive and that’s what matters
and now we have the setting for the entire rest of the movie basically
oh hey thanos. that’s uh. that’s a big army you got there
i don’t really remember everything that happened with The Past thanos, gamora, and nebula but i remember that gamora once again sees what a twat her adoptive father is and is like “oh hell na”
cue the gang fighting for their lives against Past thanos. literally
oh shit thor’s about to be killed????
OH MY GOD HE HAS THE HAMMER
cue the theater screaming as they should
hell yeah. bonk that giant space grape with the god of thunder’s hammer. you go steve. and look like a badass doing it as you should
shit’s still fucked and they eventually get their asses handed to them one by one
somewhere in here the shield breaks just like we saw in age of ultron. and like damn bro i liked that thing
steve stands up by himself because bitch. you cant kill him unless he says so. he dies on his own terms. he didn’t live for over a fucking century to die like this
our mans is standing up against a whole ass army knowing full well that he can’t win but damn if he aint ready to try
“ok listen strange. you have to open the portal to his left. his LEFT. you hear me???”
“steve. STEVE. on your left.”
cue the most goosebump-inducing scene that i have ever seen and probably will ever see. i would do anything to see that scene for the first time again. that feeling was like nothing i’ve ever experienced
the amazing symphonics are NOT helping my already-about-to-explode-from-excitement heart
now the gang’s ALL here. and we all cry because all of our peeps are back from the dead and we all missed them and highkey grieved for them after infinity war
i can’t remember if steve actually sees bucky yet but i think he does and i wanted to cry on the spot because not only did i miss bucky but man did i just want them to see each other again
cue sick pan of the whole ass marvel roster like smash ultimate, including howard duck somewhere in there
PETER OUR BOY SWINGIN ON IN
“AVENGERS. assemble.” “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA”
but we all know damn well that not a single person could hear him whisper that shit. like steve bro speak up a little
and the battle for the ages commences
we get to see all our favorite boys are girls fuck shit up and it’s absolutely incredible. wow it really feels like someone’s missing who could that be.
this is now a very elaborate game of keepaway
“catch” “Catch” “CATCH “CATCH”
“hey queens” he remembered. catch me cryin
“hey peter. got somethin for me?” god i love her. flew through a whole ass spaceship. no stoppin her
t'challa remembers clint's name. he did care
oh yeah scott is fucking humongous again, but third time’s the charm ig. maybe he won't pass the fuck out this time
somewhere in here, strange starts holding like. an entire ocean back and i dont really remember where it came from
we get a whole segment of marvel women kicking ass and taking names and i think i just need to take a minute. WE collectively need to take a minute
carol flies straight through a spaceship and everyone is like ???? hello????? where have you been?????????
carol gets literally headbutted by thanos and doesnt move a fucking inch. and that look of murder in her eyes. she could tell me to walk into a pit of lava and i would not question it. the power
“launch the missiles!!!” “but sir, our army-” “DO IT”
damn thanos our expectations for you were low but holy fuck
somewhere in here i think petter quill sees Past gamora and is like gamora???? and she like kicks him in the balls or somethin and is like “this is the ones i picked?????”
the fight continues and honestly a lot of it’s a blur but damn was it not the coolest thing i’ve ever seen.
cue strange knowing exactly how this was gonna go down, and holding up a single finger
i dont think ive ever seen that look on tony's face before
oh shit thanos has the gauntlet and all the stones. fuck.
wait holdup that gauntlet looks a little funky
WAIT HOLDUP
“i am inevitable”
“and i. am iron man.”
the theater, once again holds its breath
all is lowkey calm and everyone is shook
thanos’s entire army slowly fades away. including one of those big worm things that almost eats (i think it was) rocket but like. dusts right as it hits the ground and is a really cool shot
and thanos sits down on a rock. and finally is gone. and it's so cathartic
oh joyous day!! they’ve won!! they’ve done it!!! wait holdup where’s tony. i remember what happened to bruce where the fuck is tony
wait
wait hold on
wait hold on a minute
“we did it. we won, mr stark. we won. please, mr stark”
“pep.”
“it’s ok. you can rest. you can rest.”
i have officially passed away and am a sobbing mess. you can’t do this to me. he’s gonna come back. there’s no way. tony stark doesn’t die. no.
this is a fucking funeral. i am going to combust into tears
“proof that tony stark has a heart”
i just wanted him to be able to see morgan grow up.
but him and nat are eating shawarma together in the sky now.
“i’m recording this in case something goes wrong, which it won’t.”
“i love you 3000.”
oh we’re still rolling. oh we don’t even get a minute to process
steve is leaving??? wait holdup we cant lose both. no
“are you sure about this?” “i have to”
“i’m with you til the end of the line” so that was a fucking lie
but steve deserves to do what makes him happy. so i can’t be too mad. actually, nah i aint even mad i’m just sad
bucky looks so dejected. so sad. someone please give him a hug. he desperately needs it
oh hey steve. but you’re old now. hey then, grandpa. how did you. get there
buck and sam go talk to him as they should
“you wanna talk about her?” “no, i don’t think i will”
“how does it feel?” “like it belongs to someone else”
sam has officially inhered the shield, and by extension, his very own bucky barnes. it’s a packaged deal
clint’s got his family back. and they can finally finish their picnic or whatever they were doing at the beginning of the movies
and steve finally got that dance. finally. and he looks so happy. so content.
and that’s about all i remember
i have not watched endgame since i saw it in theaters when it came out because i absolutely do not have the emotional stability to do it again. but damn the disney plus shows have been bangin
i hope you enjoyed the ride, thank you for joining me in my. whatever the fuck this is
#marvel#avengers#mcu#mcu quotes#endgame#avengers endgame#steve rogers#tony stark#thor#natasha romanov#natasha romanoff#clint barton#bruce banner#sam wilson#bucky barns#this took me a whole ass hour#an hour well spent#i know i missed things#but it was like 3 years ago ok#marvel's avengers
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Analysis of The Real Jake (SPOILERS)
I can't decide whether to make this post a stream-of-consciousness style or group it into evidence for x... but since it's easier, I'll just write my thoughts as I go. Although a lot of this is factual ties to, say, FNAF 4, things like relating Margie to Henry are just my own headcanon and you can do with that what you will AKA don't take this all too seriously, but have fun with it. There’s also specific notes about Michael Afton, for those that just want to know what was said regarding him (presumably).
Before I start, please note I've had three hours of sleep in the last... 28 hours? IDK I can't math, especially not on this little sleep. So, there may be errors. I tried to make a note on things I was unsure about, too.
Note: I wrote this before the Evan=CC theory was all but confirmed. Although I believe this theory from the logbook, I think a lot of these notes are still valid.
Read my notes under the cut:
Margie shares similar physical appearance to Henry: Pg 84 “The window fan blew a lock of her shoulder-length brown hair across her upper lip so it looked like she had a mustache.”
“Mrs. Afton” stand in is mentioned: Pg 86 “...it had been four years since his Mom had died...” (Jake is 9 in the story)
I notice when Scott mentions plaid. Pg 87 “...a green-and-blue plaid plush chair...” I mostly wanted to note this since canonically, Henry had a green plaid shirt.
“William” stand in is mentioned. Pg 89 “And you know he thinks about you [Jake] all the time?” “So, he has to concentrate on what he's doing... ...I don't want him thinking about me and end up shooting himself in the foot or something.” Pg 102 “Yeah, I did. [I spilled some chocolate ice cream] Right on my shirt!” Pg 122 “I did that today! [While playing a DDR like game, breaking a shoelace.]” (Admittedly, I only counted these because I headcanon William is much more of a bumbling fool than he appears. It comes up very often as you can see... although you could write it off as Evan just trying to relate to his kid.)
“William” stand in is mentioned. Pg 92 “...Margie was pretty sure Evan couldn't afford to replace a washer and dryer” and “...Evan, at his rank, could barely afford her” Pg 110 “Gillian's house shared stlying with Evan's, but hers was probably four times bigger.” (Again, I headcanon William and his family is on the low end of middle class, if not lower, in terms of income. Particularly, the house is cramped.)
“Mrs. Afton” stand in is mentioned. Pg 93 “First, Jake's Mom was killed.” Pg 139 “The mom's dead.” (You could infer that she died via something akin to a car crash in the context of the story, however if you reflect it to the games given the commonalities, I like to think of this as confirmation that William murdered her, given the word 'killed' is used.)
Margie records herself on her cell phone. Pg 93 (and on other pages) (Again referencing my headcanon for Henry, in which he records ideas/diaries often. At minimum, Henry is referred to as “Cassette Man” in PizzaSim so... I just thought it could make for an interesting comparison.)
Jake mentions his “friends”. Pg 99 “Patty and Davey... Vic... and the twins... Ellie and Evie... Kyle, Clay, and Garrett” (Also, he isn't mentioned until later, but there's his best friend Brandon, too. I noted these in reference to CC talking about his 'friends', either IRL or the plushies. I assume his IRL friends are the MCI victims. The number doesn't add up though. I really, really wanted to make a connection about the twins, considering Charlie and Sammy are twins, but there wasn't enough evidence to write it off as anything other than a coincidence. Also... Clay, really? We need another double name in this series? Ugh.)
What's your favorite flavor? Chocolate Pg. 102 “What flavor did you get?” “Chocolate. Duh.” (This is a stretch, but it did remind me of Help Wanted's final level in the main game, where you're asked to choose your favorite cake flavor. Although, they're discussing ice cream here.)
Maybe some insight into William's personality? Pg. 103 “You ever do that, Evan?” “What?” “Let off steam.” “Me? No. Steam is pretty much what keeps me going.” (Just more evidence that William is obsessed with his work. You could imply “steam” implies he runs like a machine, but that's stretching a bit.)
Pg. 113 -118 (Jake climbs out of his window to run off to play at the arcade with his friend. Obvious parallel to the child in Midnight Motorist, although it's daytime and no animatronics/fursuits luring him.) There is this, on Pg 121 also. Jake says, “We played all the racing games. I love racing games.”
PURPLE Pg 121 “...did you get a slushie at the arcade? I got one. I got grape. It turned my tongue purple.” “My tongue's purple, too!” “Purple power!” (Uh, do I really need to explain this? I should note that Evan is the one mentioning “grape”. I guess William likes grape flavor and purple.)
'Michael' is mentioned. Sort of a stand in for Michael Afton, but it should be noted that Michael and Evan are brothers in this universe. Pg 126, 127 “Michael...lived in Europe for a few years...” “Michael's a serious dude. He's, well, a little different. He's intense about making money...the way he is about it... can make him seem like he's not human.” “So, he's like a cyborg with bad programming?” Michael has some dialogue: “You must excersize caution. You could get chocolate on my suit, and that would be bad. Very, very bad.” (The very very bad thing is a running joke in the family, which is why this comes up. I don't have a lot to say about it, though. I think Michael [Afton] being obsessed with money seems a bit counter intuitive to how we know him, but who knows? I also want to note that Evan doesn't seem antagonistic towards Michael; in fact, he “hate[s] to ask him for favors”.)
Also, Pg 141 “His [Michael's] flat, gruff voice was unmistakable.” Michael is also the first one to hear his father is dead and informs Margie about it. “I have been notified that Evan's dead.” Pg 142 “She had only met Michael the one time, and she knew the way he processed the world was very different from what was “normal”” Michael also states to Margie: “I've got Evan's will... you're Jake's guardian and he left you the house and some savings. I'm the executor.” Margie also says: “He[Michael]'s a numbers genius, manages money for the wealthy people and has made a killing doing it.” “He's not a bad guy. He just doesn't know how to connect. He doesn't feel the way we do.” (Just more Michael characterization.)
Direct FNAF 4 easter egg references: Pg 128 “...the IV stand lurking in the corner of the room” Pg 129 “...and the line of perscription medication bottles marching across the top of the chest of drawers”
Margie is more than a nanny and possibly in love with Evan: Pg. 139 “She'd come to love Evan, too... like a brother.” Pg 140 “...she was included in the outings, movie nights, game nights, and storytelling time...” Pg 149 “...she wanted Evan to be more than just a boss, and being in his room when he was gone made her feel like a lovelorn stalker.” “Love him like a brother... She snorted. Boy, had she been lying to herself.” Pg 158 “What she was feeling called for a screaming fit or a total mental breakdown.” (Yeah, this is just me reading too much into this for Willry content, haha... But still. I am determined that Margie is a Henry stand-in.)
'I will put you back together' Pg 140 “I'm trying to bring you home whole.” (Evan is discussing “no man left behind” with his son, Jake. I think this is obvious.)
William's home office? Pg. 149 “When he was home, she'd go in and vacuum or put away laundry... ...when he was gone...coming in here felt like an invasion of privacy.” “Evan's room would be her room.” “...I'd feel like I was sleeping in your bed, she thought.” “...the room felt discretely masculine.” “The walls were covered in family photos.” “The shelves were stuffed with fiction... mysteries to classics, nonfiction... how-to books...from rebuilding a car engine to planting a garden.”
FNAF 4 reference. Pg 152 “Outside, a dog barked.” (You can hear a dog barking as ambient noise during nights when playing FNAF 4.)
Other notes:
It happens a lot, but one of the main things in the book is the doll Simon and how Jake talks to it. This is very blatantly a reference to the Golden Freddy Plush (“Psychic Friend Fredbear”). The story confirms it's Jake's father, Evan, talking through it. Although it makes the one scene in FNAF 4 a little wonky (the only scene where we see Purple Guy), I think it's pretty much confirmed that it's William talking to CC now. Obviously, we already suspected this due to Sister Location's “Secret Room”. In this story, Evan says he did it because he wanted to give Jake some hope he would live. Combined with both the IV/medicine bottle easter eggs (in the story and FNAF 4) I think it's plausible to assume that CC was taken home after the Bite of '83 for a period of time before he passed away. I will admit, also, that Evan definetly comes off as a very caring father (in comparison to how we presume William is based on what we've seen of him as a person; although I argued this before on this blog, I don't think William hates his kids. I think he's neglectful, moreso as the story goes on. I think he resents Michael for many reasons but I won't go into that here. I just don't think he's the abusive monster the fanbase interprets him to be—at least not early on.)
The cabinet reminds me a lot of the closets in the novel series. A built in shelf with a doll in it. A doll that represents a child. Considering Margie tends to this doll (see Pg. 130-135), I have to draw more parallels between her and Henry.
The fan is mentioned A LOT. I don't really know why, but I guess we can't help but think of every single FNAF office when it's brought up. Specifically, on Pg. 106, Margie mentions the fan in her room is as loud as a jet engine and the sound made her nervous. Once again, I'm reminded of PizzaSim. Seriously, screw you fan.
The heat is mentioned a lot, too. I know the story takes place in summer, but this did remind me of Pizza Sim.
Pg. 93 “Margie sat down in the faded blue webbed lawn chair that was set up, for reasons she never understood, in front of the shelves by the stairs.” (I noted this because it's specifically called out and I don't know why.)
Margie talks about why she's working for Evan: Pg. 95 “I didn't get the internship I applied for.” I like to think her and Mia (from 1280) were after the same internship. (I may be misremembering, but I'm pretty sure Mia mentioned an internship at the hospital.)
Jake is mentioned to have brown hair, green eyes. His favorite color is green. He also wears green often. I couldn't find anything really interesting about it. It would make more sense as a Puppet reference, tbh (because of the green bracelet (and eyes? I may be remembering wrong) I guess it's also worth noting that Elizabeth has green eyes.
Pg 135 “Are you afraid people will think you're murdering me?” “...I could end you so quickly you'd never make a sound.” (Just an odd conversation between Jake and Margie. Margie is joking here, obviously.) Also, Pg. 136 “I just figured your [Jake's] wires got crossed or your circuits were frying.” (Admittedly, I don't know what to make of this. Could be a reference to Robot-CC, if you believe that or MikeBot [I don't], but more likely just ironic dialogue. It could also reference Jake's future in the Stichwraith?)
Pg 139 “Sometimes, Margie wished she was like one of the robots Jake liked so much.” (Although I can't really compare this to Henry, I did write William with this mindset and thought it was worth mentioning.)
Pg 141+ So, Evan dies overseas (he's a soldier). (I think this could be hinting that William has been springlocked around the time CC passes away. Jake has been home for some time after his diagnosis so we can infer based on that and the easter eggs that CC was brought home to die in peace. At the very least, William's probably very absent during this time. Possibly brought in for questioning but not arrested. I don't know. I feel like there's something to this.)
Pg 154 “Dave's at work.” (Why? Can we not use established names? Aghhh)
Pg 155 “The ambulance arrived at 11:32.” (I don't know why this is stated so outright. I couldn't find a reason, except that a few paragraphs earlier they say it will arrive by noon. I don't know why it's so specific, but I felt like noting it anyway.)
Pg 159 “Five people. Five sets of eyes. And none of them noticed...” (Yeah. We all know how important 5 is in FNAF.)
Three medical personel are mentioned. One at the end is named Nancy [No Last Name Given], but I like to think its a reference to Man in 1280 and we're dealing with Heracles Hospital once more, although it's never said in this story. Speaking of, the only thing that really stood out to me in 1280's story was that a billionare funded the restoration of the hospital. I like to headcanon that was Henry's doing—I imagine him obscessing over overcompensating for his mistakes by giving back in every way possible, even if it isn't directly related to him.
So, this post only took two hours of my life. I hope someone gets some use out of it, be it for my intended Willry purposes or maybe those Michael fans that are curious about it. If you enjoyed this post, let me know. I'd love to write up more of these if I have the time.
I have other write-ups on this blog, too. Just search fnaf theories on my blog page!
#fazbear frights#spoilers#blackbird#the real jake#michael afton#william afton#henry emily#crying child#willry#helliam#fnaf 4#five nights at freddy's#fnaf#fan theory#fnaf theories#fnaf theory
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ive seen ur posts mentioning u have thoughts on queer perspective towards death and how mcr fit into it so. if u ever decide to share other ideas on the topic id love to read it! (i think ur really good at getting your thoughts accross) (u dont have to answer btw i just wasnt sure abt shooting a dm abt this)
it’s been so long i’m so sorry um i have a lot of thoughts idk if u still want them here’s an attempt at a short version...
edit: changing this to under a cut cuz it’s insanely long. if u don’t feel like reading almost 1.5k words probably don’t read it.
basically i think that mortality and death are very common things for all humans to think about and make art about because we’re kinda... obsessed with and extremely afraid of death. which (i think) stems from how death is one of the few things we know is going to happen to us, and yet we can’t understand it really. we know it is the end but we cannot know anything about it because it is the end. so that intrigues us (and makes us afraid) and then u can add in how we see other people in our life die before we do... basically it all adds up to us being obsessed with understanding and defying our own mortality somehow.
we can see this theme in mcr a lot, the interplay between mortality and defiance and hope... i call it hope vs inevitability and i think it’s especially noticeable in bullets and danger days, because in the other two they’re not really fighting so much as existing side by side... i wrote in notes once that in those albums, the hope is in the inevitable...
in black parade it’s pretty much totally like this; after you die you join the black parade, and your memory will carry on. there is fear going into it, but it very much feels like an album accepting and even embracing the end, not fighting it. accepting it and embracing it with this crazy tone... come one come all to this tragic affair. wipe off that makeup, what’s in is despair... (note: i used to think that line was what sin is despair and i still wonder if that was on purpose). revenge is a bit more complex but i have always thought that beyond the hope of getting the girl back, of bringing her back to life (against the end, against death and mortality) there must also be some relief in death for the guy demo lover... if you would kill a thousand men to get your lover back from the dead, would you die to meet them there? <- maybe i’m wrong; there is still hope vs inevitability here.
in danger days and bullets, though, is where i feel like we see those things ultimately fight; in bullets we have this desperate desire to be immortal and mean something, coupled with the strong feeling that you will die with nothing. that you will die. (i have a post on this theme in the song demolition lovers). then, in danger days we see this theme come with this absolute denial of mortality (killjoys never die) coupled with this intense fear of death and being remembered wrong or not at all. and of course this culminates in them dying. (here is my post on this theme in danger days it’s kinda a mess but so is this post so whatever).
right so we’ve established mcr (and humanity in general) is obsessed with mortality we already knew that though. what does it have to do with queerness.
basically there’s a couple things.
1. the connection of both otherness and love with death (note: this also applies to a lot of minorities but queerness is what’s really applicable to mcr specifically). the extent to which mcr intertwines narratives of love and otherness with death and violence is.... a lot. we see it in every album, i believe; it’s most noticeable in bullets in drowning lessons and demo lovers, in revenge in so many songs i’m not going to try to list them, in black parade in cancer, wttbp and my way home is through you, and in danger days in save yourself, only hope for me, and scarecrow. this was just off the top of my head; there’s probably more songs with examples of this.
this is very queer (at least when done by mcr; as most of mcr is white the issues that come with things like the history of interracial marriage, etc. don’t really apply) because of how for queer people our identities and love can be deadly to us... the history of queer love and identity is obviously marked with violence against the people displaying that love and identity.
straight cis white guys don’t usually talk about death with the connection with love at the forefront, at least not that i’ve seen. every once in awhile they do, i guess, if they’re talking about grief, but otherwise, no. demo lovers is my favorite example of the connection of love with death; especially in the first couple verses, the two seem so linked. the first 2 mentions of death or the end in the song are immediately followed by “with you”... “i’d end my days with you in a hail of bullets,” and “i would drive on to the end with you.”
in the whole demo lovers arc, through bullets and revenge, the themes of death and love are so intertwined it’s impossible to untangle them. if i tried to make a post of all the times in revenge death and love are talked about in the same lyric, as if one thing, i would be screenshotting lyrics all night. of course, if we bring in gwgt theory, and start thinking about how the girl and guy demo lovers are a metaphor for gerard’s relationship with his gender, we can go way further with this too. the simultaneous love story involving these parts of himself, and intertwined violence and death. the fear present... the lyrics that talk at the same time about hurting yourself and being hurt by others... but that’s a different post, really. i’m gonna try to stay more surface level. no speculating on metaphors (today).
in black parade i think we see the connection of otherness with death a lot more than the connection with love, although they’re both still present... in danger days the concept of otherness when associated with death is super clear: killjoys defy the city and become something “other,” which is scorned and hated by BLI/nd, and they get killed for it. love is also a pretty common theme in danger days songs, often intertwined with death, though less obviously than in revenge.
2. just... the extent to which this idea of mortality and death and immortality and memory is talked about is interesting in itself i think. this obsession with our legacy and our mortality is present in a lot of stuff, not just queer stuff, but it’s just everywhere in mcr’s discography (and a lot of the subsequent groups of music related to/associated with mcr, which are also often known for being queer). they constantly talk about how they’ll die, and how they’ll die sooner rather than later, and can they live forever anyway, what does immortality mean after all, will they be remembered, what will their legacy be... etc.
memory and legacy is something i haven’t really talked about, but i think it’s also essential to the conversation. for obvious reasons queer people (and people of a lot of other minorities but i’m only talking about the queer part cuz it’s the most/the only applicable thing here) have a more complicated relationship with how we’ll be remembered and whether we’ll be remembered than cishet people do. how mcr talks about this reminds me a lot of the sappho fragment tumblr passes around ever so often... “someone will remember us / i say / even in another time.” (comparison/parallels post of mcr lyrics and that quote by @milfygerard (and added onto by me) here.)
and that brings us back around to the theme of hope vs inevitability... as i mentioned earlier, this theme isn’t necessarily totally queer on it’s own, but as with talking about memory and legacy the way mcr does, if you talk about it so much that it becomes a core theme in all of your albums it ends up feeling a lot more queer than before. hope vs inevitability in mcr’s work connects to love and death and both at once and is just everywhere. and it ends up connecting to the way a lot of queer people think about our death and our mortality and our hope. and how the future and the past are thought about in connection to these themes i think is kind of queer too — when your history is barely spoken and your present is in hiding, of course you look to the future. despite that that means looking towards the ending. and maybe you embrace that ending, because what else is there to do?
i’m very sorry. this was not short. if you have questions, or want to tell me how i’m wrong, or have your own thoughts, do not be afraid to dm me or send me asks please... fascinating topic.
#long post#nonsense#love and death#mcr thoughts file#gender hours once again#asks#hangernhigh#i like ur profile picture!!#death mention#violence mention#ask to tag ???#natasha writes#q slur
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Yuletide letter
I am laughingpineapple on AO3
Hello dear author! I hope you’ll have fun with our match. Feel free to draw from general or fandom-specific likes, past letters, and/or follow your heart.
Likes: worldbuilding, slice of life (especially if the event the fic focuses on is made up but canon-specific), missing moments, 5+1 and similar formats, bonding and emotional support/intimacy, physical intimacy, lingering touches, loyalty, casefic, surrealism, magical realism, established relationships, future fic (when in doubt, tell me what’s happening to them five, ten, twenty years in the future!), hurt/comfort, throwing characters into non-canon environments, banter, functional relationships between dysfunctional individuals, unexplained mysteries, bittersweet moods, journal/epistolary fic, dreams and memories and identities, tropey plots that are already close enough to characters/canon, outsider POV, UST, resolved UST, exploring the ~deep lore, leaning on the uniqueness of the canon setting/mood, found families, characters reuniting after a long and/or harrowing time, friends-to-lovers, road trips, maps, mutual pining, cuddling, wintry moods, the feeling of flannel and other fabrics, ridiculous concepts played entirely straight, sensory details, places being haunted, people being haunted, the mystery of the woods, small hopes in bleak worlds, electricity, places that don’t quite add up, mismatched memories, caves and deep places, distant city lights at night, emphasis on non-human traits of non-human characters (gen-wise, but also a hearty yes xeno for applicable ships), emphasis on inhuman traits of characters who were human once and have sort of shed it all behind
Cool with: any tense, any pov, any rating, plotty, not plotty, IF, unrequested characters popping up.
DNW: non-canonical rape, non-canonical children, focus on children, unrequested ships (background established canon couples are okay, mentions of parents are okay!), canon retellings, consent issues, actual covid (fantasy plagues are okay)
Les Cités Obscures: any
This is a very general “please, anything in the style of canon, just maybe with less thoughtless sexism” request. I want to lose myself in these cities again, and in the strange lands that connect them. I’d be happy to follow any of the known characters and/or OCs, or eschew characters altogether and write about the cities themselves. What caught your imagination in Brüsel, Xhystos, Taxandria, Alaxis...? The history of some cool building that was only marginally featured in one of the stories? Or an OC city! If you’ve got a favourite European city that doesn’t already have its obscure counterpart, please tell me all about it! Go big, go wild! What strange and classically surrealist happenings take place within its walls? Or even... outside Europe... Nerding out about architecture is of course very welcome. I would also love to read a story based on any Schuiten illustration, contextualizing it as if it were part of this ‘verse. Here’s a bunch of them, for example!
Ghost Trick: Cabanela
You know.. him. Dazzlingly OTT, untiring, rock-solid self-esteem, loyal to a fault, following a rhythm of his own, flawless intuition until it fails and it all burns down… him. I just want to see more of him doing stuff! The way he’s chill and open toward new people (like Sissel and Missile in ch15) makes him perfect to throw at most other characters and see how they react to the sparkles… I’d love some focus on how ridiculous his aesthetic is, half Saturday Night Fever half hardboiled detective half bubbly preteen (for a total of 150%) and yet he makes it work. Or how ruthless he can be, possibly for the sake of the people he cares for. The quote “The intimacy of big parties”. Him and Alma in the new timeline bonding over knowing (once Jowd has spilled the beans) but not remembering that terrible timeline. Some tropey scenario on the job. Snark-offs with Pigeon Man, by which I mean PM snarks and it bounces off him like water off a spotless white goose’s back.
Ship-wise it’s only Cabanela/Jowd whenever it’s not infidelity, Cabanela/Alma in what-ifs also if it’s not infidelity and Cabanela/Alma/Jowd for me (and Lynne/Memry and Yomiel/fianSissel on the side). There are a bunch of shippy prompts in all my past letters - I would however reiterate here that Jowd. is. the worst tease. always. Like, just saying, but assume he’s pining big time and Jowd and Alma figure it out - they’d make a national sport out of excruciatingly protracted teasing.
Conversely, Cabanela/Lynne and Cabanela/Yomiel are NOTPs especially from Cabanela’s side. So while I appreciate the thick tension of a good Yomiel VS Cabanela confrontation like everyone and their cat, and also really appreciate a roughed-up Cabanela, and I do love Yomiel in his own right… I don’t want Cabanela being into it. Adrenaline junkie he may be but this hurts and his coat’s a mess and there’s no perfect winning scenario so he hates every second of it. (JOWD being super into Cabanela being roughed up is another matter altogether and he should probably mind his own business. ...incompatible kinks, truly tragic. they’ll have to find some other common ground. they’re smart, resourceful, playful fellows, I’m sure they’ll manage)
Kentucky Route Zero: Donald kentuckyroutezero
I love everyone in the cast, all acts and interludes, and I am extremely into all the themes this incredible work of art ended up exploring. Agreeing with the overall doom and gloom up to Act IV, I was blown away by Act V’s strong affirmation of the importance of the arts and of the bonds we make and of carving up spaces for ourselves in capitalism’s wake. Donald was, indeed, not a part of any of that. Even the final interlude updates us on Lula and mentions Joseph, but the big guy is nowhere to be seen. So, you know, there’s fanfiction! He’s so static, defeated. I am fascinated by the chain of metaphysical spaces that goes surface -> Zero -> Echo -> Dogwood and even within that framework, the hall of the mountain king is like a hopeless dead end. Dude’s terminally stuck. So - once again, in the spirit of transformative works, how could he get... you know... unstuck? Did Lula’s momentous appearance in Act III shake him? Having a functioning Xanadu again, perhaps? How could he interrogate that oracle, what recursive wonders would it show him? If he decides to leave, what does it feel to be on the surface again after so long, or on the river perhaps? Maybe he is forced to leave by the flood, if not this one, the next... Having him meet any other character would be amazing. Past or future time spent with Weaver... seeing Conway again, changed... programmer guy chatting up musician androids... did he know Carrington from his college days or was Carrington only a friend of Lula’s?
As for Lula herself and Joseph too: “Flipping through the pages, Conway is able to gather that it’s a story about three characters: Joseph, Donald, and Lula. It’s something like a tragic love triangle, but much more complex. Some kind of tangled, painfully concave love polygon.” 😔 I ship them as a full triad, if you can nudge them in that direction, good. But I’m very open to non-romantic resolutions as well, going past their messy feelings to find each other as friends after so many years maybe. Or... a start. idk.
I’d be interested in fic that leans on the game’s adjacent genres: wanna go full-on American Gothic? Dip into surrealism? Take a leaf from Twin Peaks with tulpa / split narratives to explore the characters’ issues? I’m also open to AUs, real or through Xanadu. This also feels like a good place to stress that I really, really like caves.
And now for something completely different: FAQ: The “Snake Fight” Portion of Your Thesis Defense is in the tagset this year. I’d say that the crossover with the snake portion of Here and there along the Echo writes itself, but it would not be correct, as in fact I would like you to write it for me. Feel free to not feature Donald if you focus on this crossover instead!
Uru would be a fun crossover too, for Donald specifically. He’s very DRC-shaped in how he tilts at doomed projects which just so happen to be deep underground.
Pyre: Volfred Sandalwood
This is a Volfred solo, Volfred&literally anyone or Volfred/Tariq, /Oralech or /Tariq/Oralech request. I adore everyone in that Blackwagon+Dalbert+Celeste, so if you want to add a Nightwing or two to any prompt, please do! I also love all the Scribes and find Erisa a compelling tragic figure, while out of the other triumvirates, I’m “love to hate them” for Manley, Brighton, Udmildhe and Deluge and would not like to see them featured in sympathetic roles. fwiw I also enjoy Jodi/Celeste and Bertrude/Pamitha a lot!
I feel deeply for all of Pyre’s main themes - literacy, degrees of freedom, the fragile time that is the end of a historical cycle, nobodies rising up to the occasion, building a better society, and of course found family, “distance cannot separate our spirits” and all that jazz, and Volfred is squarely rooted at the center of all of them. I really really love everything he stands for, even if he’s overbearingly smug in standing for it. Just please tell me things about my fave. His relationship to the Scribes (as a historian, a some kind of vision, via *ae or once he’s a star himself)? A ‘forced vacay’ Downside ending where he looks at the Union from afar and keeps living in this strange transformational place? Life in a cramped Blackwagon that was meant for like 5 people tops and is currently eight Nightwings, a herald and an orb? Since he picked him for the job to begin with, does he respect and cherish Hedwyn as he dang well should? What does it feel like to try and Read a herald? Was he ever in danger, in the Commonwealth or in the Downside? What daring act of resistance did he and Bertrude pull off at some point in their past? It’d be cool if one of his old pamphlets came up at some point. Does he puff up as prime minister because he’s nervous, and who can see past his hyper-professionalism and lend a hand? Please roast him big time about the votes he assigns to the various Nightwings in his planner? What’s his attitude toward the flame’s purification (what with being a tree but mostly like, as a general concept. He did nothing wrong!) (well he definitely said some things wrong and sometimes oftentimes the ego jumps out, but his intentions did nothing wrong)? When did his calculating approach fail him? Something with Pamitha along the lines of that edit that goes “Can we talk, one ten to another?“/"I am an eleven, my girl, but continue”? Dude could easily be voted sexiest voice in the Downside - how much is he aware of it? Does he sing? I love how he bears his ‘reader’ brand proudly. And speaking of scars, I have to wonder, looking at Manley for comparison, if the shape of his head, with that massive crack, isn’t also due to injuries.
As a refrain from my general likes: emphatically yes xeno to both shippy interactions at all ratings and to gen explorations of what a Sap is like… I’d love to read all your headcanons.
Ship-wise, I enjoy him with Tariq as this kind of esoteric connection of minds, guarded words full of secret meanings, long contemplative walks together (is any external pov watching...?), Volfred’s Reader powers brushing against Tariq’s mind and getting weak in the knees at the starlit expanse he finds there, so unlike mortal thoughts. Tariq finds his individuality learning from him; Volfred presumably gets a transcendent glimpse of the Scribes. And I enjoy him with Oralech as pretty much the opposite of that, Oralech is so very mortal compared to him, such a precious, fleeting, burning life especially after his fall. Oralech’s idealism is very dear to me, it was their plan, their shared revolutionary spirit, I find it deeply moving. And I am very interested in seeing them rebuild their connection now that Oralech is back, changed, and in some ways he can learn to let go of his misconceptions and slowly open himself to Volfred’s love again, but in other ways that’s who he is now, with this deep-set anger, and what does it even feel to realize that you’re the symbol of the end of an era (the end of the Rites, the fading of the Scribes). I’m interested in both topside and downside endings for all of them, as long as they end up on the same side, the revolution was peaceful and they don’t angst too much about the side they ended in. Tariq can ‘find his way home’ in the near post-canon somehow or even be summoned again, as a different aspect of the same ‘moonlit vision’ that once inspired Soliam Murr.
Strandbeest: any
https://www.strandbeest.com/
I would just like words to go with these, please and thank you so very much. Worldbuild to your heart’s content! Specifically: I’m fascinated by the premise that the strandbeest are living creatures that evolve and adapt to their ecosystem. A world where life is just wind stomachs and sandy joints, and the tide that can catch you unaware. I would like a story that feels distinctly inorganic. The wonder that is the existence of these creatures. Their unique struggles. Weird and experimental if you like. With a mechanical focus, maybe?
I nominated four critters as a selection of the different cool things they can do - Percipiere Excelsus is huge and has the hammer mechanism, Suspendisse’s tail senses the hardness of the sand, Uminami is my fave caterpillar and the caterpillars overall feel like a new paradigm after a mass extinction event, Ader straight-up flies... but they’re all wonderful. If you want to focus on different strandbeest, please do!
Twin Peaks: Lucy Moran
Case fic but they don’t find out jack shit, someone disappears, David Bowie was there, it’s complicated. Fragmented, shifted, mirrored identities. New Lodge spaces. The risks of staring into the void for too long. Gentle illusions. Transcendence. The moon. Static buzzing. Any title from the s3 ethereal whooshing compilation used as a prompt, actually. Whatever goes on on Blue Pine mountain or the even more mysterious things that go on on White Tail mountain where exactly zero canon locations are found. Twin Peaks is all about the mystery to me, the awe of mystery and unknowability and the human drive to look beyond and the risks of getting a peek, and about shared consciousness and trauma taking physical form in an uncaring world. Go wild with the ethereal whooshing! But I also love the human warmth at the heart of it all, and sometimes it’s enough to anchor these characters and let them have a nice day. A fic entirely focused on some instance of coziness against the cold chaotic background of canon would be great too.
For Lucy specifically, a big draw for me is how canon (...s2 need not apply) empathizes with her way of processing the world. Not just Peaks, but On the Air’s protag who is basically a Lucy expy also gets the narrative completely on her side and that’s great. And I love how in s3, her focus on the small things around her is always echoed by bigger, climactic events beyond her horizon (bunnies / Jack Rabbit’s palace, chair order / Garland’s chair, her first scene talking about the two sheriffs / doubles everywhere...). It feels to me like some kind of off-kilter mindfulness and I love it. She’s also got a loving husband and an amazing son, which, in this economy and also this canon? Damn. The one functional family, imagine that. I am not interested in focus on family dynamics, but singularly, either Lucy/Andy or Lucy&Wally are great - in particular, I’m interested in how strange they are and yet they make it work. With the ruthless critique of traditional family structure that’s all over canon, maybe they make it work specifically because they’re not doing any of that. A bit like the Addams family... but... not goth...? Anyway. I’d love to see Lucy interact with and maybe strike a friendship with any character she’s never shared a scene with in canon! In the tagset, there’s Diane for some secretaries bonding, Audrey because??? why not?, Albert because it’d be an epic enemies to friends slowburn, some version of Laura in the future, if we’re feeling really daring maybe even some version of Coop in the future, still fragmented... or anyone you want! Outside the tagset I’d be curious about Hawk, Margaret and maybe Doris in particular, I think, and Phil, and Nadine and the Invitation to Love fandom in general (Frost says it still airs - did it get as weird as TP s3 did?), but if you have an idea with someone else, absolutely go for it!
Canon-specific DNWs: any singular Dreamer being the ‘source’ of canon, BOB (let alone Judy) being forever defeated in the finale, Judy being an active malevolent presence in the characters’ lives, clear explanations for canonical ambiguities, ‘Odessaverse’ being the reality layer, the Fireman’s House by the Sea being the White Lodge, whatever Twin Perfect’s on about, Cooper/Audrey, Cooper/Laura
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does she make you feel as good as i do? | r.t.
a/n: just a quick one parter (part 2 here) that i wrote while avoiding other responsibilities. i was listening to she by pale waves when writing this and it’s kinda based on that so listen along. yeah idk where this came from, guess i was just in a sad mood. sorry in advance. also i feel like this writing style(?) is kinda weird so let me know what you think.
words: 1.8k
warnings: swearing, depression, angst, mentions of smut
~
i looked blankly at myself in the mirror. i looked like shit, eyes darkened with endless sleepless nights, hair disheveled from not showering or brushing it. a large hoodie drowned out my body. this was my current state of living or at least it has been for the past few weeks.
a loud ringing cut me out of my fixation on myself. my legs were weak as they carried me towards the phone.
“hello?” my voice was rough from not actually speaking for days.
a familiar voice was on the other side. “y/n? god are you okay?!” a concerned john was on the line.
“yeah i-“
“where have you been? i’ve not seen you in weeks!” he was becoming more concerned the more he thought about how long it had actually been since anyone had see me. john was my brother, older by about 2 years but we have always been close.
“i’ve just been busy with...stuff?” it sounded more like a question than i meant. i twirled the phone cord round my finger nervously.
he sighed loudly. he probably knew what was happening, he knew the tendencies i had of isolating myself for weeks on end. “i’m coming over.”
before i had time to protest the phone line went dead. i looked around my small apartment. it was an image of depression. the sofa was covered in blankets which i would cocoon myself in while watching endless hours of tv. glasses covered the small table in front of the sofa. dirty clothes were strayed across the floor from when i changed my clothes. i sighed, there was no point trying to hide this from john, and quite frankly i was too weak to try and clean it before he arrived. instead, i wrapped a blanket around my shoulders and slumped onto the sofa until the doorbell rang. i jumped slightly, mostly because the lack of sleep made me more jumpy than usual.
i pulled the heavy door open and instantly avoided eye contact. john on the other hand looked intently at my frail image. his hand reached out to touch my shoulder softly. “y/n?” his voice broke slightly as he spoke.
“come in.” was all i could say without bursting into tears. he walked inside the dark apartment and he fought back tears himself. when he looked at his sister she looked visible wrecked. something bad must have happened. he instantly pulled me into a hug, wrapping his arms around me and gently rubbing my back, i hugged him back. god, i had missed him.
“what happened?” he questioned as we sat on the sofa together, concern was written all across his face.
i had never told john about my... relations with his band mate roger. it’s not that i didn’t want to tell him it just all happened so quick.
it had been a friday night, i was in a bar on the corner of a street i don’t remember. i was alone, my friends were all bores and never went out, so i made the fateful decision to go out myself. a young girl in a bar alone was bound to get some male attention, whether wanted or not. i didn’t expect it to be from a familiar face though. roger had been wearing a white button up with the top buttons undone as usual. classic roger right?
“y/n?” his voice was surprised but obviously slurred from one too many drinks. i tucked my hair behind my ear nervously. like every other girl in the uk, i may have had a tiny crush on roger. despite what you may think, just because i was john’s sister didn’t mean i saw the band more. they weren’t really my friends, they were all a few years older and had left college while i was still there. i saw them occasionally if john rang me asking to bring him some papers he had left at home or if i was supporting john at their gigs or if i went round to johns and they all happened to be there. but me and roger had never really had a conversation that entailed more than just casual small talk.
“yeah?” i tried to be as confident as i could with the little amount of alcohol in my system.
“imagine meeting you here!” he took the barstool next to me.
“hmmm it’s a bar?” i had no clue where this conversation was heading, except a dead end.
“what are you doing here?!” he looked genuinely interested in such a mundane topic.
i raised my drink and smiled. “the same reason everyone else is. to get shitfaced!” i laughed lightly. he chuckled too.
“now that is something i am good at!”
i was confused as to why he was being so friendly to me. surely i was just deaky’s silly little sister to him and all the other boys. i’m just that girl who brings deaky’s papers to him with a coffee and a donut.
one thing lead to another that night, we kept drinking and chatting until the bartender kicked us out on the cold london streets at some ungodly hour in the morning. my apartment was on the outskirts of town and taxi runs had stopped hours ago. as if fate was trying to get us together my naive mind thought. ever the gentleman, roger offered for me to stay at his. “can’t leave deaky’s sister in the freezing streets at 4am, can i now?” he joked lighting a cigarette.
his apartment was a short walk away, he had offered me his jacket and it was draped over my shoulders to keep me warm. he continued his conversation about some new car he had bought and despite knowing nothing about cars, i was still somehow captivated.
entering his apartment made my throat tighten and my stomach instantly filled with butterflies. i slipped his jacket off and handed it to him meekly. i felt an intense awkwardness, as if he didn’t know how to act when bringing a girl home who he no intentions of shagging. should i kiss him? is that why he brought me here? questions flew around in my mind and i was trapped in my thoughts.
“y/n?” his voice was loud and it snapped me out my thoughts. he smiled at me. god he was fucking hot.
i tried to speak, i swear i did. maybe the alcohol had really gotten to my head. i don’t remember how it happened. i just remember his lips on mine, kissing me with such passion and desire. against the wall. he picked me up, taking me into the kitchen. i was on the table and his hands were all over my body like fire. kissing my neck, i swear i couldn’t think.
the memory was so vivid, i could still feel his hands on my body, everywhere.
i scratched the back on my head, snapping out off my inappropriate vision whilst being in the room with my brother. “i don’t know” i answered his question after the long time in my thoughts. my voice broke as i spoke. john just pulled me into a hug again as i cried quietly. i knew he would get mad as soon as i told him it was roger.
the next morning after staying at roger’s, i awoke in a panic, grabbing my things quickly and quietly, being sure not to wake him. i left. i regretted it instantly because i knew that i was just another shag to him.
but it wasn’t, he started coming round to my apartment. at first it was to apologise, it ended with him in my bed. the visits became more frequent, he would come up with random yet adorable excuses to see me. it evolved into a few dates and more sex.
but that came crashing down two weeks ago. queen were playing a gig at a bar as usual, i went along to support john firstly, of course, but now i was there for roger too. the thing between us had only been going on for about two months and we were nothing official, we never would be. they performed brilliantly as usual. i stayed at the table i was saving for everyone when they finished. their set ended, they bowed, i cheered louder than ever. i was met by john first, he ran up to the table and hugged me tightly, then brian and freddie came over, roger was missing.
“how were we love?” freddie’s voice was filled with happiness but my chest hurt and my mind began filling with thoughts of roger’s absence.
“brilliant as usual boys!” i faked happiness. “where’s roger?” i tried not to sound to desperate or obvious.
brian laughed slightly, “probably entertaining that blonde hanging around backstage. i’d give him 10 minutes love. you don’t want to see more of him than you should.” him and the other boys laughed in agreement. obviously they didn’t know that me and roger had something going on. my chest felt like someone punched right through it.
“i’m going to the toilet” i mumbled. i all but sprinted to the toilet, i pushed the door open. i could feel a panic attack started, the walls felt like they were closing in, i could hear my heart beat loudly in my ears and i was having trouble breathing. it felt like everything stopped when i saw him. standing in the middle of the bathroom between a blonde girls legs. my heart stopped, the shock on my face was very visible.
“y/n!” he called but i turned on my heels and ran.
since that night i hadn’t spoke to roger, i didn’t want to hear what he had to say. that we weren’t official so it wasnt cheating. i didn’t want to see him again. that was two weeks ago, since then ive locked myself away from everyone.
i tried to explain it to john, i left out certain details about sex but i got the point across. his softness and caring side fizzled away quickly and was replaced with anger.
“i’ll kill him” he muttered through clenched teeth.
“john, please. there’s no need for that. it’s best just to act like nothing happened.” i tried to stop the tears as i pleaded with him.
“he fucking hurt you and didn’t even check if you were okay.” johns voice was breaking again.
“it’ll be okay. john please, we’re both adults and we can deal with this ourselves.” i tried pleading with him again.
he sighed in defeat. “fine, but i’m not leaving you until you’ve showered and eaten. come on.”
john cared for me, making me feel a bit better. having told someone about all the emotions which had been trapped inside me for the past weeks made me feel the most emotionally relieved. i wasn’t hiding anything anymore but my chest still ached, for i knew that one day i’d have to look roger taylor in the eyes again.
tag list: @writingfortoomanyfandoms @xgoingdownx
#roger taylor x reader#roger taylor writing#roger taylor fanfic#roger taylor#john deacon x reader#john deacon#freddie mercury#brain may#queen#70s#80s#bohrap#ben hardy#bohemian rhapsody#becki writes
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1. Do you bite or lick ice cream? Lick
2. What is home to you? Alabama:/
3. What was the last lie you told? I couldnt tell you
4. Does everyone deserve the truth? Maybe not?
6. Describe a moment in which you did something unacceptable in a bad situation. Walk away, move states..
7. List two things that are more easily done than said. (No, I didn't mix them up.) Being alone & fuck irdk
8. When was the last time you worked really hard to achieve something? Mhm 4 years ago.
9. How many all nighters have you pulled? A lotttt haha
10. If humans didn't evolve to laugh or smile, how would we express our happiness instead? Woah people express that? no but humans would probably bone all the time.
11. How many romantic "things" or "flings" have you had? Only 2 (technically 3) serious relationships. Many flings.
12. What is your paradise? I dont have one :(
13. What is your favorite background noise? (Ex. Water dripping, people talking.) Music
14. How many hearts do you think you have broken? Only 1... maybe 2 soon. (not you hehe.)
15. What is the most important thing about electronics? What does this say about you? Finding friendships through social media or other platforms. And mhm probably that im a lonely pos
16. Why do people care about celebrities? Do you care about celebrities? Because they're pretty. Not really.
17. What is the most annoying thing someone can do to you? Chew loud.
18. Do you overexaggerate? What are the pros and cons of this? Eh, yeah. And I cant think of any pros.
19. Have you played any instruments before? Which instruments? Piano, saxophone
20. Do you like taking selfies? Why or why not? No. I stare at it until i hate it.
21. List 3 things you like about yourself?
22. What is the best advice someone has ever given you? To not give up. As simple as that sounds.
23. Do you have what it takes to raise a child? Why or why not? No. Dont you need to be mentally stable- i would hope so..
24. How do you cheer yourself up after a bad day? Play games for hours.
25. When was the last time you felt awkward? Ha. Literally 5 minutes ago.
26. Are you introverted or extroverted? Or a mixture of both? Introverted x100000
27. What constitutes a good friend? Someone who doesnt give up on you amd atleast tries to understand.
28. Would you rather have a lot of friends to hang out with or just one best friend? One best friend.
29. In a regular day, what do you not want to hear? 'Hey hows your day going'
30. What is your dream job? Fuck, is this still a question.. to be a homicide detective in the biggest city i can think of.
31. Is it better to be lazy but smart or hardworking but unintelligent? Lazy and smart DUH
32. What is a truth about yourself that others find hard to believe?
33. What have you always wondered about the other gender? What it feels like to GET OFF. DUH.
34. Which fantasy world would you like to visit the most? Um my own dreams i guess.
35. Describe the worst friend you have ever befriended. Im not wasting my time describing that.
36. Imagine that you have switched bodies with someone you don't know. You can't switch back. What do you do? Live it up. I think id feel happy honestly.
37. If you found the recipe for immortality, would you sell it or would you burn it? Mh. Sell it, their problem now and im rich.
38. What is the most important, applicable class you have ever taken? Current events.
39. Name the last book you read. Dammed- chuck palahniuk
40. Imagine that you are unable to express emotion. How would this affect your world? No change
41. When was the last time you made the first move? Um never..
42. What is your opinion on electronic music such as dubstep or trap? Trash
43. What was the last tv show youve watched? Rick and Morty.
44. Do you like and appreciate your life? I appreciate what i am trying to do.
45. Do you like and appreciate yourself?
46. When was the last time you cried? Yesterday
47. What are you scared of? Heights.
48. What is the most embarrassing, cringe-worthy thing you have ever done? Um live my life everyday probably.
49. What are some of your hobbies? .... literally WORSE question. I smoke cigs. Is that a hobby?
50. What is a superficial yet annoying mistake you constantly make?
51. Are you a good friend? What makes you a good friend? If not, what makes you a bad friend? I feel like i am both. I try to be there for them. But also, im so hard to get so i feel like i might come off the wrong way a lot.
52. Do you honestly learn from your mistakes? Honestly; nope.
53. What have you learned the hard way? Not to care what people think. After wasting my whole life. Im starting to realize it doesnt matter.
54. What is the most important thing to have in order to attain happiness? Follow your heart
56. Are you a creative or a logical thinker? Both but probably logical.
57. What is the smartest thing you have ever done?
58. What is your ideal meal? Fuckk probably so good ass chicken with some gooooood asssssss mac and cheese. As lame as that sounds hahaha.
59. What is the worst thing someone could do on a date? 1. Go on date with me
60. Do you like animals? Which kind is your favorite? Yeah and dogs are cute but i love elephants.
61. If you could turn one legal thing illegal, what would it be? Christmas.
62. Do you have any guilty pleasures? Of courseeeee (;
63. What is the best thing that the internet has ever created? Video games.
64. Do you like playing video games? Which video games? Woah you read my mind of sum? Shooter games.
65. What is your opinion on beauty in today's society? Bullshit
66. Are you a morning person? When do you usually wake up? No not really and like 5pm nowadays.
67. Do you have a favorite Disney movie? Character? No
68. Would you rather live in the city or in the countryside? City but i love the countryside
69. Would you rather live near the ocean or in the mountains? Mountains
70. What are the best things about winter? Cold. Even though i hate it. Snow. Even if i dont see it. Trees dying.
71. What scares you most about the future? Literally everything.
72. What makes you feel old? Doing nothing.
73. How many hours do you spend on the computer or phone on average? Idk like 5.
74. What are some of your New Year's resolutions? Be a better me.
75. What is your life story in 6 words?
76. Describe yourself in one word. Awkward.
77. What bad habits do you do? Smoking
78. What genre of music do you listen to? everything
79. Most prominent childhood memory? I would say, but its embarrassing that that's the memory.
80. Imagine if you had an older brother. If you already have one, what is it like? If you don't, how would this change your life? My life would be so different. Maybe i would have someone to talk to.
81. Spirit animal?
82. Do you believe in horoscopes? Yes
83. What is the worst advice you've ever been given?
84. List the 3 most important people in your life right now. 1. Fox 2. Fox 3. Fox
85. Favorite memory of your family. :/
86. What do you look for in a relationship? Happiness
87. Do you have a role model? Why or why not? No. I dont need it. But now that i think about it i have one role model.
88. What is your opinion on social media? Dumb
89. Are you a pessimist or an optimist? Pessimest
90. List some things that you think are overpriced? Food
91. What is your worst memory or creepiest experience? ..
92. What superpower would ruin the world? Any of them
93. What is something you swore you would never do when you grew up, but you did anyway? Exactly what im doing now. Nothing. Giving up. Dropping out
94. What lessons have you learned from movies and which movies were they? Dont trust yourself when you know you arent okay. Fight club
95. If you could travel anywhere, where would you go? Europe
96. How do you approach people? I dont but i guess a smile.
97. What is your opinion on first impressions? I think theyre okay. Only if you dont judge.
98. What are some things you did as a child that you no longer do? Lol play with imaginary friends
99. What languages can you speak? English
100. What do you think society will be like in 30 years? Lol hopefully ill be dead bc that shit sounds terrible
101. What do you do on your lazy days? Play games.
102. What ended your last relationship? I had enough.
103. Favorite food? Soul food
104. What is the most terrifying dream you've ever had? Fuck im not saying.
105. When was the last time you got seriously angry? Last night
106. What was the last friendship you broke? My friend Ashley:(
107. Do you have any pet peeves? Close minded people
108. Who was the last person you gave a hug to? Zack
109. When was the last time you got seriously stressed? Last night
110. What part of your personality do you want to change? I dont have one.
111. Who is the most positively influential person in your life right now? My sister Grace.
112. What is your biggest motivation? My siblings. Faith & Grace.
113. What did you want to be when you were little? Honestly i never knew.
114. What are some things that you are good at? Smokin weed
115. What is one thing you want to be good at? Social skills
116. What distracts you the most, especially when you're trying to work? My mind
117. How important is privacy to you? Eh pretty significant i guess.
118. If you could create one social norm, what would it be? Be friends with everybody.
119. What's the craziest lie you've ever told? Um.. i told my 2nd grade teacher my family died in a car crash.
120. What story do you like to tell about yourself at parties? I dont go to parties haaha
121. What is the lamest thing that you have seen someone do? have friends and socialize too much like woah calm down you know youre still alone.. right. Like its only you. Hahah jk. But irdk.
122. What is the stupidest thing you've done to impress someone? a guy invited me over and ive never done anything sexual before so i pretended like i knew and i hurt his dick like bad. (We didnt have sex)
123. What is your morning routine? Wake up, wash face, brush teeth, get dressed, and then boom feel sad
124. What's the last thing you did that is worth remembering?
125. If karma was coming back to you, would it help or hurt you? Help
126. What is your opinion on playing "hard to get?" Being sort of isolated like not opening up. Which is okay bc if they want you they'll wait.
127. What are the pros and cons of straightforward? Cons, you may hurt feelings. Pro, you know yourself and what you want to say congratulations
128. What do you consider "leading" someone on? Being fake happy.
129. Are you the friendzoner or the friendzoned? Friendzoner
130. What do you admire most about your friends? How beautiful he is. Inside & out.
131. What do you admire most about your family? They're still here.
132. What is your opinion on "going with the flow?" You may forget where you are trying to go. Or who you are.
133. Do you enjoy talking or listening? Listening.
134. When is it time to end a friendship? Idk
135. What is the worst excuse you've ever come up with? Lol too many.
136. If GPA didn't matter, what courses would you have taken? Doesnt matter.
137. What are your favorite baby names? Ive always liked Riley for a girl name and idk havent thought Bout a boys name.
138. When was the last time you had a deep conversation with someone? Maybe a week or so ago. Or a few days ago.
139. What instantly ruins a conversation? Lack of excitement
140. Biggest turn ons and turn on offs. Affection. And idk
143. When did you last do something outside of your comfort zone? God every day.
147. What do you like about the 21st century? ???
141. Biggest disappointment. Myself
142. Do you have any self-restraint? A little.
144. Prized possession(s)? little things
145. What is your opinion on second chances? They might seem okay but idk.... depends i guess
146. Text or call? Both, depends on whom im texting or callin
148. What advice would you give to yourself 5 years ago? Life is hard and stupid but choices you make will stay with you forever so what are you gonna do, follow your heart or head? (head is better hope)
149. How organized are you? Eh not really anymore.
150. Favorite mode of transportation. My car
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Y’all need to know something that’s going on with me right now. I’m making this post in your best interest because I feel like it’s important that other writers and bloggers who follow me should know. If you follow or contact the user ironfurycollector, they are not an honest person and faked their own death to me.
Okay so I started talking to her in September and it was great. both Shawn fans and she loved my fics. we exchanged a few pics, and we talked about our lives a little bit from time to time. but i started to wonder why she never posted anything on her blog, only liked everything. no big deal. some people just dont reblog a lot.
then there was some outtake pics she bought that she was gonna email to me and when she sent them they were from her ‘brother’s email. she said something about hers being hacked a while back. now the question is, why not just make a new one? it takes ten seconds. (this email fiasco can be backed up by another trusted friend, more to come on this.)
it was a red flag but i ignored it and moved on. we talked more and more about shawn and my fics. (side note: some time in December she sent me a pic that her friend recently took but she was in a hoodie and a puffy coat, it’s dead ass summer in AUS rn. NOT coat weather. i mentioned this in the chat but she just moved on to another topic) but then i started getting really suspicious after she entered this relationship with her brother’s best friend. see, it was too perfect, too ‘fic’ like but i just went with it cuz it was interesting and maybe he was this good and i was a sucker for it.
but then it just got over the top. the stories, the details, it just was too much for a first time relationship and the guy/her being only 18-19 years old.
so at one point he supposedly left a little scavenger hunt of notes around her place when she fell asleep and he had to leave. this was only a week or two into their relationship. pretty unbelievable. so then shes sending me pics of the little riddle notes for her scavenger hunt and the handwriting changed half way thru. also, one of the pics there was a guy’s leg in the pic. and she lied to me and said it was a fake one her brother pranked her with on Halloween. well. i called her on that, asking for a pic of it and she fessed up to lying saying ‘she was embarrassed cuz she couldn't figure out the clues and she had her friend Bradley come over to help her’. which, honestly sure i’d buy but why lie? and how fast did he get there? smells fishy.
moving on. i was confused cuz she said her friend was named Bradley. well. that was also the name on the ‘brother’s email’ she was using. i called her on this. she said they are both Bradley and she calls her brother B. I was iffy. What are the chances. Honestly.
At this time i called her out and told her i thought she was cat fishing me. and asked to see a pic of her with the notes from the scavenger hunt. which she took forever to send a pic, making up the excuse of being in the bathroom, and they getting dressed but finally did. it appeared she was holding the notes but idk tbh. (in all her pics shes sent it’s clearly the same girl)
Fast forward and she has this wild weekend with her now boyfriend/ brother’s best friend. like so much sex. it’s literally impossible how long they supposedly went and how many times her boyfriend supposedly came. it was just too wild and for her claiming to be a virgin, it was too much and he, being a supposedly 18yr old was way too experienced sounding. seriously. it was like a fic.
so like i asked for a pic of her boyfriend cuz supposedly he’s so shawn like and shit and all i’ve seen was this one generic pic of him (god knows where that came from) and she can’t get any on facebook and blah blah. now i asked several times for pics of this boy (shes with him all the time) but she always had an excuse. always.
at this point im just so suspicious she’s lying about everything. now her boyfriend is going off for a sports camp thing for a month in the US. shes sad. okay. but then about two days later she says she has some family drama and won’t be available for a few days. im like okay. shit happens.sure.
she tells her best friend ‘Bradley’ to message me on tumblr so i wouldn’t be lonely. so he had to make a tumblr cuz ‘he just used hers to read your fic’. so im like okay sure. well. while i talked to him i noticed he speaks, types, has the same exact quirks as her. i mean so specifically the same. i use lmao a lot, too much perhaps. and she started using it too cuz we talked all the time, you pick things up from people. but for this guy, whom ive never spoken with and i assume would have their own quirks and way of speaking, to be the exact same is super fishy to me.
so a few days later she texts me (i have her cell # and have since just after the boyfriend thing started) and shes like saying that she’s not in AUS anymore and that her boyfriend just COULDNT be with out her and paid for a flight to come stay with him for a week in the US while he’s doing his sport thing. Not sure where an 18 year old boy gets money like that let alone how she was staying with him, specially if he was on an exchange program for a school function. red flag. im suspicious.
so then she says ‘oh its so boring here all day with out him cuz hes at camp for sports” and im like thinking well....you could text me all day or message me on tumblr but you don’t? doesn't make sense. so when i get a chance to talk to her, she says shes heading home soon. and i ask what the family drama was and she says something about her aunt. and i dont remember how it came up but i asked about her living situation back home. cuz previously she’d sent me stuff about living with a roommate but now she was saying she lived with her brother. so i asked. and she said she lives at home but her parents have been away for a while but they just came back and then there was drama with her aunt. like, what? that just didn’t make sense to me at all. she never mentioned moving or anything and always said she lived with her brother (never mentioned parents ever before and also where the fuck would they be for so long??). (also side note, when we first started talking she said she had a horse/pony and his name was Waffles i think and she loved him so much and was always out there with him. never ever heard about this again. ever.)
so here’s the point where i am just done with this and i have a bad feeling and i can’t ignore it anymore. she tells me her boyfriend will be back soon and i should go talk to Bradley about my concept i wanted to tell her about. i told her im not as comfortable talking to him about it cuz it’s not the same. she insists. and then...she calls him Larry. and im like what? who? and she tells me this story how that’s his nickname cuz her mom would call them that when she got mad when they were kids. (that makes no sense) and she called him that since he beat up some guy for her in high school (still makes no sense and now im absolutely done with this not adding up shit) also this whole time ‘Bradley’ hasn’t been on for a day or two. and suddenly as soon as i say goodbye to her. he’s suddenly online. Fishy.
I decide not to talk and i block him to see what happens. nothing happens. so now i decide to take this story to a friend on here who i trust a lot. she tells me to block her and see what happens. see if she notices. a day later and she’s supposed to be home from the US and back in AUS. i get a text, something about a car accident on the way home from the airport. I don’t respond.
at this point my trusted friend mentions a user randomly contacting her and sending her outtakes in exchange for writing a oneshot a while back. and that the email was weird and ‘fishy’ and ‘from her brothers email.’ low and behold. it’s the same person i’ve been talking to. and she told my trusted friend that she got the pics ‘from her friend’ when she told me should bought them (with what money idk cuz they were expensive $80-$100 per sets and yet she was complaining about bring broke??)
I go on with my blogging and writing. next day. she doesn't text me. another day and she sends something along the lines of “hope you’re okay i noticed you haven’t been active.” I don’t respond because I want to see if she notices I've blocked her and asks me about it.
another day passes.
I don’t get any messages about being blocked, or asking what’s going on or why can’t she see my tumblr, etc. Things that an actual person and normal friend would probably be sending texts about far more frequently than just one or two texts.
so then i get a text today from her cell that says this
which i don’t believe for one second. so i take it to my trusted friend. and she tells me that she has liked a few of her posts since last night. oh. really. blogging from the grave huh? So i ask my trusted friend to message her. to see if she replies. and low and behold:
I’m honestly pissed off and hurt. I called this person my friend. I grew to trust this person and share my days/stories/ideas with them. I have no idea how much is true of what she’s ever told me. I have no idea if she is a real person or another person pretending. But even if all the other stuff that I was iffy on and sent up red flags for me were somehow bizarre truths, this text is a lie. She faked her own death and I am calling her out on this. Because I won’t be friend with a person like this. And I highly suggest no one is because this is wrong and sick.
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i watched the dont lie svt mafia game (the first two links u sent) and it was so fun!!! i love how you dont know who the mafia is until the end so it’s like youre playing along too :) also seungkwan was so smart!!! gradually building everyones trust and gathering allies around him!! i was so sad when he was killed off tho, he literally was abt to catch the mafia 😭 and hoshi REVEALING HIMSELF AS THE MAFIA was the funniest thing ever but also really smart like he turned everyone against mingyu (who honestly i thought was the mafia too), and in the last round hoshi was just openly like “who should we kill today” IM DEAD 😂 also can i just say that jeonghan looked so GOOD in that game...he’s such a sexy mafia 😏 i cant wait to watch their second dont lie mafia game!
u already know for 127 jaehyun was my first bias and now mark is my ult <3 and for dreamies if u dont count mark (since i knew him from 127 first so kinda unfair) i think jaemin was prob also my first and current bias?? he was my first bias and i just never stopped 😂 for wayv i think my bias is yangyang hehe :) im trying to think abt what similarities in my biases are - it might just be the smiley happy funny ones with the best laughs as we talked about before (this is weird but i think when i first meet someone i notice their laugh?? like i love ppl who have laughs that you can tell are just truly from their heart if that makes sense) i might also have a slight bias for rap lines but i think that is not as concrete as the smiley/funny thing!
omg thats so cool that you know so many languages!! youre so cool hehe :) i always have so much respect for ppl who learned languages (idk i dont count me knowing canto as learning a language bc i kinda passively learned it thanks to my parents hahaha) i took french and spanish for a bit in school but i didnt continue and have thus forgotten most of it D: (which i kinda regret, i want to try learning french again someday) also i totally get that about chinese and japanese being intimidating...ive always thought it'd be so cool to learn another asian language (and one that is more widely used than canto) but they are quite hard, esp for chinese/japanese where the writing system is a lot harder to learn!! i learned korean hangul so i can sound out words veryyyy slowly but i dont know what they mean 99% of the time 😂 i havent seriously applied myself to actively learning a third language but i've always wanted to! i can understand basic korean phrases tho since i watch so much korean content ahahaha
hmm as for weird phobias, i really hate cockroaches?? or bugs in general...and i also hate when circles are bunched together rly closely lol (i think it’s called tryptophobia but i wouldnt recommend googling that cuz it grosses me out so much omg 😰😰)
ok now to close this out on a happier note lol i THINK i can name all the svt members now??? like with maybe 85% accuracy 😂 and i think my first biases are joshua, jeonghan, & kinda dino and vernon :)) but i feel myself slowly falling for all of them i love how chaotic they are and ive laughed so much watching their videos already 😊😊
AAAH i'm so glad you loved it 🥺 ikr it was so good??? i especially loved the part when hoshi just blamed mingyu!!!!! and manipulated everyone into thinking that he was one of the mafia!!! what a smart move but also fun? hoshi the god of variety shows!! tbh i kinda knew minghao was the mafia since the beginning... he was just too quiet... i mean he is a quiet person yk but he was more suspicious than usual 👀 and i guess bc in the beginning they gave us the preview of their reactions and he laughed and knowing he's a scorpio i only assumed... so i didn't 100% buy hoshi's lie bc i was still sure that hao was one of the mafia 🤷🏻♀️ still tho it was legendary!!!! but i guess mingyu played it stupid and he was sus to begin with so 🤷🏻♀️ yeah.... YOU CAN SAY THAT JEONGHAN LOOKS GOOD BC damn right he does 😍 he is a beautiful man what can i say 🤷🏻♀️ he is also very confident in himself (the other day i watched one gose ep from 2019 it's called debate night i think and basically they're having a debate about the stupidest, most pointless things in the world (like is it better to live AS a pigeon or live WITH a pigeon for a year, or is it better to have 3 eyes or 3 arms 😅) and jeonghan always had a counter argument, ALWAYS, but he would say it so confidently looking handsome as hell he could make me believe that grass was blue..) btw gose always has dumb content like this but still i think it's the best idol content out there only bc svt are crazy funny and chaotic and those 13 boys share a total of 2 braincells shared by wonwoo and jun each; like there is one ep i think it's called the8 and the 12 shadows ans basically they all move in a row and all 12 of them have to repeat what the first member is doing, it might sound smart when i explain it but if you'd watch it you'd see that it's so dumb and pointless but it's funny and 1hour long and carats watch it bc 🤷🏻♀️ anyways what i'm trying to do is show you what you're getting yourself into😌
ohhhh i think jaehyun, mark, nana and yangyang all have beautiful smiles and they’re all very smiley and bright people 🥺 so that's definitely the one thing your biases have in common 🥺 that's so cute 🥺 oh you think you're attracted more to the rap line? 🤔 all of your nct biases are indeed rappers (jaehyun is a i can do it all i'm 97 line he is excluded) so maybe??? but yeah you biasing bright idols is 🥺 adorable!!!
ahh thank you 🥺 i try!! yeah most people forget languages if they don't use them regularly </3 kinda scared i'll forget french bc i never use it nowadays, i used to know a woman who only spoke french and i would have to translate to her what my family tells her and vice versa, it was a great french exercise 💪 but i don't see her anymore so </3 the fact that you speak canto and chinese(mandarin i guess?) intimidates you really adds fuel to the fire<3 it's great that you know how to read hangul!!! me too!! you'll get better at reading with practise! but compared to chinese characters i don't think it's that hard, i mean, how do chinese people even memorize all the characters?? or WORSE how do foreigners memorize them??! writing in chinese must be so hard do you have to pay attention to all the tiny lines?? that's a lot of work 😨 i am terrified 😨 do you also know basic japanese phrases from anime?? bc personally i do but i know a lot more korean than japanese i mean thank god, i'm learning korean religiously tho 😂 still tho can't watch idol content without titles</3 (except with chinese wayv members who struggle OMG MAYBE I LOVE CHINA LINE BC THEY MAKE KOREAN A BIT EASIER? anyways i completely relate to them bc korean grammar is so hard, so strange and so different from grammar i'm used to in 'western' languages)
cockroaches? 😨 i too hate insects of every kind<3 so i understand <3 oh i know about tryptophobia(?)!!! one of my friends is scared of the same thing too, have to admit it does look disgusting 😬 i'm also afraid of heights and water!!! (but like the sea and the ocean sjsgsjaha i can't swim!! and i never want to!!!) 😨😅
AHHHH I'M SO PROUD OF YOU 🤧 what a bias combo thooooo 👀 jeonghan? i approve! he is so fun!!! so beautiful!! sexc 👀 jeonghan is so interesting i love him and also joshua is so pretty too?? i mean obvs they're both visuals sjgssj but it's different with shua bc i can look at him all day it's soooo calming to just look at him?? ahh angelic! it's kinda interesting to me bc you bias jeonghan and joshua and jihan (their ship name) is kind of a big deal™ did you know that????? i assume it was unintetional and you had no idea about it jsgsja i also approve of vernon and dino as well but i mean i would approve of anyone and everyone at this point 🤷🏻♀️ have you seen pics of jeonghan with long hair??? i feel lowkey bad for saying this but he is so beautiful i deadass thought he was a woman 😧
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Never enough
I always find myself here again, in this dark hole. I can honestly say I've probably never lived a week in my life where I didn't think about suicide. Don't get me wrong, I've been pretty happy for majority of my life but that doesn't mean the idea of suicide doesn't cross your head. I can have the greatest week ever but I'll still think about it at the end of the night when I slump down in my bed. Some days it's worse than others. Especially when it just feels like nothing is going right. Like, my current motto in life is that when one door opens, two more close. Doors I didn't even know were open. Doors I never thought I would might want to go through. I hate being by myself. That's when I get wierd in my head. Have you ever thought and asked yourself, who'd be at your funeral? Or even worse, who would cry? Who would actually miss you? Who will do your eulogy and what will be said? I'm 22. And I want a life. But everything I've tried these past few years hasn't worked for me. I have conditions on conditions, all things I didn't ask for or want to develop or anything like that but it prevents me from living my life the way I want to. Ever hear somebody say "it's okay man, God has a plan for you." I'm waiting and I want to know already. But. It hurts to wait. I've always had these self-worth issues where no matter what I feel like I'm not enough. Shit, I've gotten so bad I hated myself. Like I really think I need a psychiatrist at times. I still do. But I can't afford that LOL. You see, no matter what I feel like I'm a waste of space. Like I'm a burden. I don't care what you say or what anybody says, I just can't help but believe I am a burden. I've always seen myself just weighing down the world. There aren't many times I felt of importance. There aren't many times I felt anything positive at all about myself. I guess that why I always wanted to know more about people, to know their pains and their history because I wanted to help. Ive never wanted anybody to be in my shoes. I do not ever want anybody to feel like a waste of blood, skin and organs that could be helping in prolonging somebody else's life. Sometimes I just don't want to feel. I really want to die sometimes. Funny thing is, I'm a coward. I hate blades. I would probably jump off a building or swallow a million Tylenols or even hang myself. I could never cut myself. Funny thing about jumping off a building, I used to be afraid of heights but now at the edge, I try to imagine how long of a fall it may be. If it'd be instadeath or not. I don't like thinking of these things but it just happens sometimes.
I hate me.
You ever ask yourself if you're enough? For anything? I dont think I'm enough. For anything. Anyone. My parents and former teachers always said that I was a smart kid. But I never saw it. I mean I could understand shit pretty quickly but you just gotta listen man. Ask questions where you don't understand. That's all.
I sometimes just want to default to the void. Just poof. Gone. Vanish. Especially on nights like this where I'm fighting with her. But I feel like dying too. Sometimes I really wonder what it's like to die. Like I really wanted to watch flatliners. Just to see what some author or writer might think happens when you're dead. Is that not fascinating. To not know something you will only ever know once but never get to share? Like imagine if your heart just stops. Or what a suicide bomber feels. Or even a bullet. But I hate bombs and bullets man. Like just cause I wanna die, doesn't mean I want everyone to die.
Will I ever be enough? For anything? Will my parents ever be proud of me. Will I ever feel like my family cares. Will I ever be enough to my girlfriend. Will I ever be enough anywhere? Can I be enough? Maybe for myself?
Idk.
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82 Truths
rules: once you’ve been tagged you’re supposed to write a post with eighty-two truths and then tag twenty-five people.
tagged by @hoseokjinns bruh this has been sitting in my drafts for how many eons????
name: Dawn blood type: b nickname(s): Celeste (cousins mainly) and then anything else is adding an e or i sound to the end of my name (tho i have noticed dawners is a frequent name) r/s: dead inside zodiac sign: libruh pronouns: she\her favorite tv shows: dude, i havent seen any tv shows since i was 8, that was well over a decade ago. i collect the dvd/blurays of tv shows but not often. my mother and i are really into futurama but other than that its usually animes that i collect long or short hair: literally lopped my hair off myself like 3 days ago height: 5′5″ do you have a crush on someone: if fictional characters count then yes, the husband list keeps growing and i need another closet to shove them in but real life im fighting a “battle” what do you like about yourself: i have yet to be called annoying or that im an ass to those i love and i support them with all i can, so ive got that going for me right or left handed: right, tho i am ambidextrous over weird ass shit. like gymnastics im left dominate in??? idfk either man list of three favourite colors: literally any color associated with fall/autumn and ill be a happy camper
right now: eating: just ate a cracker that had peanut butter on it cause im munchin hard drinking: sweet h2o man i’m about to: probably go to bed or i might work on my drafts for my writing blog, havent decided yet listening to: a mix about cats, love, breakfast and being tired by in love with a ghost (on youtube) kids: hell no, unless i know i can support the damn thing with all i can while living comfortably along with someone i KNOW wont leave both me and the kid and help me then maybe, but its still a really strong no. pets are fam tho, so technically i have like 5 kids already get married: down for that, annoying someone all the time as a “job” sounds fun, especially if we get late night adventures and do weird ass cooking class shit for fun. ITS IN THE CONTRACT YA KNOW career: i really want to travel the world and get paid to do so, but at my own pace
most recent: drink: water????? idk what you want from me man im a thirsty hoe for livin phone call: been on discord all day today with 2 of my best friends and listening to music with my bot the other half on it song you listened to: lauv reforget (literally just came on)
have you ever: dated someone twice: no been cheated on: nope, and im not the type to let them get away with it if they ever did kissed someone and regretted it: no lost someone special: yes been depressed: yes, began at a very young age due to the death of my father. literally had a midlife crisis when i was 4 cause of his death been drunk and thrown up: hell no kissed a stranger: no had glasses or contacts: glasses had sex on the first date: no, not really my thing broken someone’s heart: i think so, never really ask how they felt about it afterwards turned someone down: yuuuup cried when someone died: yes fallen for a friend: mmmmm, not really??? i usually crush on an acquaintance and my friends drag them in and somehow become friends later???
in the last year have you: made a new friend: uuuuuh, maybe 3??? i dont like leaving my house nor do i like wasting my time on strangers, especially if theyre rude fallen out of love: yeah laughed until you cried: many times, MANY FUCKING TIMES met someone who changed you: uh, i think so??? idk, i kinda find my own flow in life and people either respect it and enjoy the ride with me or fight it, and i dont have the energy to deal with pointless shit found out who your true friends were: ooooh yeah found out someone was talking about you: humans talk, its natural. i dont really do anything but i can see why someone WOULD talk shit if thats what this is asking about kissed someone on your fb list: ew no
which is better: lips or eyes: eyes hugs or kisses: hugs, i like being warm shorter or taller: both have pros and cons romantic or spontaneous: both? both sensitive or loud: idk what the fuck this is asking about but if its about being around people who are loud or sensitive then neither, im sensitive to headaches so loud people irritate me and trigger the pain and ive had bad experiences in person with sensitive people where they dont leave me alone and wind up stalking me???? i love being alone so neither hookup or relationship: relationship troublemaker or hesitant: one can be kinda fun but also a pain in the ass if they get you into trouble a lot and the other might not be as constantly fun per say but at least you shouldnt be in trouble as often
first: best friend: Samantha surgery: thankfully nothing yet sport i joined: badminton vacation: everything my parents did was while i was literally an infant soooooo yeah, greaaaaat memories
do you believe in: yourself: not all the time, but i rely on myself more than anyone else. i dont trust anyone for shit when i know damn well i can do it myself and know that if something goes wrong i myself fucked it up and can probably fix my mistake miracles: yes and no, i believe theres a reason for things to happen the way they do, and there are times i see it as miracles love at first sight: i believe in attraction at first sight, not immediately seeing someone soul or some shit heaven: im more for reincarnation and spiritual aspects in life and death
extras: how many people from your fb list do you know irl: 90% of them do you have any pets: im not counting my outside pets because there are too many to even keep track of to count so my children are 5 cats, toto my conure, oz my dog, tubby my gecko, and a beta fish and a catfish do you want to change your name: if i ever did, which i dont want to do, it’d be either Celeste or Aurora (my mom actually debated on calling me aurora after like the disney princess if you will and funny enough shes always been my favorite princess) what did you do for your last birthday: 2 of my friends kidnapped me and took me to dinner and we drove around and looked at interesting things. this years its during ren faire and im so damn happy what time did you wake up today: 9 pm. im sick atm and its really fucking up my sleep schedule what were you doing last night at midnight: just got out of a call with one of my best friends and sat on my own server for a bit chillin with my music bot before my other best friend joined my after like SIX HOURS, DAMN YOU SIMON something you can’t wait for: ren faire, getting married cause then i get to sweater slap someone and get away with it, and being comfortably happy in life last time you saw your mom: a few hours ago? i went to the kitchen to get my cat to love on her and saw her then what is one thing you wish you could change about your life: i wish i had more determination to see things through and not be scared to take the leaps to see it through have you ever talked to a person named tom: i worked in retail, so probably what’s getting on your nerves: a lot of things, mainly petty things. kinda wanna cut a toxic person out of my life but we all know thats easier said than done especially seeing how he talks to literally all of the people i talk with on a daily basis save one soul and he treated her like shit when he talked to her sooo yeah, dunno wtf is his problem but im tired of being the object of his frustration and anger, idk how the rest of my friends deal with his shit but im just so damn DONE
man im not taggin 25 people. if youd like to tag me as a “i found it from so and so” then go for it man, let youre dreams run free friend. im just a lazy sack of shit and am tired and im amazed im still up and that its TAKEN ME A MILLION DAMN YEARS TO DO THIS IM SO SORRY LEANNE
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answer all of them
answers under the cut! only doing this cause im that bored
200: My crush’s name is: no one 199: I was born in: 1996198: I am really: bored197: My cellphone company is: wtf who cares?? 196: My eye color is: green/blue 195: My shoe size is: 6.5194: My ring size is: idk small 193: My height is: smol 192: I am allergic to: cats and all of nature in the spring and summer 191: My 1st car was: an hhr or as i liked to call it a poor mans hearse190: My 1st job was: an in home care taker aka i cleaned elderly peoples homes189: Last book you read: god i dont read188: My bed is: my best friend 187: My pet: is the loml 186: My best friend: she lives too far away tbh 185: My favorite shampoo is: i use old spice 2-in-1 like the basic bitch i am184: Xbox or ps3: ps3??? what year is it the switch is where its mfkin at 183: Piggy banks are: dope af 182: In my pockets: nothing cause im a broke bitch 181: On my calendar: nothing cause im a boring bitch 180: Marriage is: cool good on everyone who is married to their best friends 179: Spongebob can: new spongebob can die cause its garbage 178: My mom: is the best 177: The last three songs I bought were? who buys songs? 176: Last YouTube video watched: air crash investigations (dont ask) 175: How many cousins do you have? idk 174: Do you have any siblings? one sister 173: Are your parents divorced? nah 172: Are you taller than your mom? nah 171: Do you play an instrument? i used to play the violin and guitar but not anymore 170: What did you do yesterday? tried not to die [ I Believe In ]169: Love at first sight: idk maybe? 168: Luck: sure 167: Fate: yeah sure 166: Yourself: hahahahahahahahahahahahaha no 165: Aliens: fuck yeah 164: Heaven: ehhh no 163: Hell: no 162: God: not really 161: Horoscopes: lowkey160: Soul mates: every one has one 159: Ghosts: kind of 158: Gay Marriage: nah why would gays want to get married 157: War: war is p stupid 156: Orbs: wtf is an orb??155: Magic: no [ This or That ]154: Hugs or Kisses: kisses 153: Drunk or High: drunk 152: Phone or Online: online 151: Red heads or Black haired: black 150: Blondes or Brunettes: brunettes 149: Hot or cold: cold 148: Summer or winter: winter 147: Autumn or Spring: autumn 146: Chocolate or vanilla: vanilla 145: Night or Day: night 144: Oranges or Apples: apples 143: Curly or Straight hair: curly 142: McDonalds or Burger King: mcdonalds 141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: this is dark chocolate erasure and i will not stand for it 140: Mac or PC: mac 139: Flip flops or high heals: neither both are garbage for the feet 138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: im already sweet and poor sooooo137: Coke or Pepsi: where is my dr. pepper representation 136: Hillary or Obama: obama 135: Burried or cremated: cremated id like to go out in a burnin glory even if im already dead 134: Singing or Dancing: singing 133: Coach or Chanel: neither 132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: who are you people 131: Small town or Big city: big city 130: Wal-Mart or Target: im a lesbian so target obviously 129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: neither 128: Manicure or Pedicure: pedicure only cause they message my feet and legs 127: East Coast or West Coast: west coast 126: Your Birthday or Christmas: xmas cause snow 125: Chocolate or Flowers: chocolate 124: Disney or Six Flags: disney 123: Yankees or Red Sox: neither who cares about baseball [ Here’s What I Think About ]122: War: men bein garbage 121: George Bush: why? 120: Gay Marriage: hell yeah we got it 119: The presidential election: we might as well have elected a crackhead 118: Abortion: let women get them safely so they dont fucking die its that simple117: MySpace: jesus is it 2006 again 116: Reality TV: its trashy but ill watch it cause im trash 115: Parents: love your parents kids (unless they are abusive) 114: Back stabbers: are awful just like maybe dont stab people in the back literally and metaphorically 113: Ebay: ive literally never used ebay in my life 112: Facebook: its p garbage i barely ever use it 111: Work: capitalism has killed workers and quality work 110: My Neighbors: they are there 109: Gas Prices: i havent gotten gas in like 2 months so like idk 108: Designer Clothes: why are they all like so ugly??107: College: stressful and only vaguely worth something 106: Sports: fun to play but boring to watch. i only go to sporting events for the alcohol 105: My family: is v dope and i love them 104: The future: stressful and i hate thinking about it [ Last time I ]103: Hugged someone: last night it was my dad 102: Last time you ate: last night lol 101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: probably back in december with my best friend 100: Cried in front of someone: oooof all the time 99: Went to a movie theater: like 2 wks ago 98: Took a vacation: january i went on a cruise 97: Swam in a pool: last summer i think 96: Changed a diaper: uhhh never…. 95: Got my nails done: god way back in high school when i thought i was straight 94: Went to a wedding: last friday! 93: Broke a bone: 3 wks ago haha 92: Got a peircing: i havent gotten a piercing since i was like 6 91: Broke the law: uhhh i plead the fifth 90: Texted: i texted my mom like 40 mins ago [ MISC ]89: Who makes you laugh the most: myself 88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: my dog shes so cute 87: The last movie I saw: spiderman into the spiderverse 86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: a vacation to see my aunt in indiana 85: The thing im not looking forward to: going back to school 84: People call me: uhhh my name? 83: The most difficult thing to do is: rn? pretty much everything 82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: never 81: My zodiac sign is: im a leo 80: The first person i talked to today was: my mom 79: First time you had a crush: first time i remember was freshman yr of college 78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: my mom 77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: i dont remember 76: Right now I am talking to: nobody im a lonely bitch 75: What are you going to do when you grow up: hopefully something to do with neuropsychology 74: I have/will get a job: 73: Tomorrow: wtf does this even mean 72: Today: or this one 71: Next Summer: and this one 70: Next Weekend: and even this one 69: I have these pets: a golden retriever mix 68: The worst sound in the world: 67: The person that makes me cry the most is: hahaha myself 66: People that make you happy: my family and friends 65: Last time I cried: yesterday 64: My friends are: amazing wonderful people that i love 63: My computer is: my lifeline 62: My School: is small but good 61: My Car: is a lesbian wagon that looks like i live in it 60: I lose all respect for people who: cheat on their s/o 59: The movie I cried at was: i dont usually cry during movies 58: Your hair color is: confusing kind of blonde also kind of brown 57: TV shows you watch: she ra, killing eve, grey anatomy too many others to list 56: Favorite web site: youtube 55: Your dream vacation: to go to germany 54: The worst pain I was ever in was: idk maybe my post surgery foot pain 53: How do you like your steak cooked: medium rare the only way a steak should be eaten 52: My room is: always a disaster 51: My favorite celebrity is: taylor swift 50: Where would you like to be: idk 49: Do you want children: noooo 48: Ever been in love: yes i have 47: Who’s your best friend: we aint naming names on here 46: More guy friends or girl friends: girl friends45: One thing that makes you feel great is: playing with my dog 44: One person that you wish you could see right now: A43: Do you have a 5 year plan: god no i dont even have a 5 hour plan 42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: nah 41: Have you pre-named your children: nope40: Last person I got mad at: myself39: I would like to move to: somewhere other than where i am now 38: I wish I was a professional: at being not depressed [ My Favorites ]37: Candy: bottle caps or ritter sports 36: Vehicle: subaru wrx hatchbacks with a wide body kit are b nice 35: President: who tf has a favorite president 34: State visited: oregon or washington 33: Cellphone provider: who has a fave cell provider???32: Athlete: none31: Actor: idk like chris pratt or something 30: Actress: rn jodie comer 29: Singer: hayley williams 28: Band: paramore 27: Clothing store: h&m 26: Grocery store: target 25: TV show: law and order svu 24: Movie: princess mononoke 23: Website: youtube 22: Animal: red panda 21: Theme park: disneyland 20: Holiday: halloween 19: Sport to watch: none they are all hella boring 18: Sport to play: softball 17: Magazine: none i dont read 16: Book: i dont read books cant concentrate for that long 15: Day of the week: idk saturday 14: Beach: ive been to a beach like 3 times and i barely remember them 13: Concert attended: paramore after laughter concert last summer 12: Thing to cook: cooking stresses me the fuck out so i dont have a favorite thing to cook 11: Food: pasta!! 10: Restaurant: uhhh i dont really have one 9: Radio station: its 2019 who listens to the radio 8: Yankee candle scent: i dont really use candles 7: Perfume: i dont wear perfume 6: Flower: peach roses probably 5: Color: red 4: Talk show host: i dont watch talk shows they are all boring 3: Comedian: john mulaney or iliza schlesinger 2: Dog breed: corgi 1: Did you answer all these truthfully? hahahahaha
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all pf them
under a read more it goes
we are bulletproof: if you could be any superhero, who would you be and why?
spiderman! walking on walls seems cool
no more dream: if you woke up tomorrow to be incredibly famous, how would you react?
“yeah this is how it’s meant to be” (do I 100% expect to be famous in the future? yes)
i like it: if you could reverse any moment in your life, what would that moment be?
throwback to middle school when my best friend confessed to me and I told her I’d date her if i were a boy
n.o: biggest pet peeve?
i don’t really have any big pet peeves but I hate the sound of nails draggin on the weird ceiling material in cars
we on: how do you deal with people who don’t like you?
avoid them like the plague bc i have Anxiety
if i ruled the world: what would you do if you found out that you were an heir to a wealthy kingdom?
possibly have a panic attack but like money
coffee: what’s your coffee order?
green tea frappe with a shot of espresso bc i’m living that college student life of no sleep and only caffeine
cypher pt. 1: if you had to be part of a kpop group, what position would you want to be (i.e. leader, visual, lead vocal, dancer, rapper, maknae, etc.)
i’d WANT to be dancer, but realistically id probably be a singer
rise of bangtan: when and how did you get into the king and legends, also known as bangtan sonyeondan?
uh i remember i listened to fire a while ago and it wasn’t exactly my style and i thought bts was kind of overhyped so i didn’t really listen to them much until like a month are blood sweat and tears came out and i finally decided to watch and mv bank with them and i thought they were funny and it was really just a downward spiral from there
satoori rap: what does home mean to you?
home has no meaning to me bc it’s always been riddled with fear
boy in luv: when you are interested in someone (romantically, sexually, etc.), does your behavior change?
i mean i flirt more but that’s just cause im a libra :/
just one day: who would you want to spend the last day of your life with?
i think i’d want time alone
tomorrow: goal that you would like to achieve within the next year?
finish learning korean
cypher pt. 2: one thing about yourself you wish people would appreciate more?
there’s nothing to appreciate about me lol
spine breaker: what is your weakness when it comes to spending money?
i love stationary
jump: favorite childhood memory?
once in kindergarten we were painting pots for mother’s day. I was the kind of kid that liked to work ahead so i just started painting, but the pot was upside down so when i turned it over it just said “wow” instead of “mom”
miss right: what is your ideal ‘type’?
kim taehyung, park jimin, or xu minghao
i like it pt. 2: dream date?
I love amusement park dates
danger: have you ever had a near-death experience?
i nearly died of alcohol poisoning once. that’s a story.
war of hormone: most embarrassing moment?
when i was like in 8th grade i thought weed and pot were two different things and I’ve never lived that down
hip hop lover: three songs that are meaningful to you?
Should i just do BTS songs?
Move, Love is Not Over, Hold Me Tight
let me know: are you good at keeping secrets?
i like to think i am
rain: most spontaneous thing you’ve ever done?
i took a day trip to Houston without telling my dad while my mom was in China
cypher pt. 3: favorite outfit to wear?
i got a new Fila hoodie in japan that’s bomb af and i look great in it plus my white hat with the long tail and my adidas samoas
blanket kick: longest time you’ve spent lying in bed (sleeping or not)?
idk how long i spent in bed but once i had a depressive episode so bad that my phone only marked 19 steps on that day
24/7 = heaven: what are you most looking forward to?
SEVENTEEN CONCERT AND MEETING SEVENTEEN
look here: do you have any hidden talents?
I can hum and beatbox at the same time
second grade: proudest accomplishment?
I finished 12 years of music theory, got put in the TMEA pamphlet and got some money from it too
i need u: are you in love?
i need u girl
hold me tight: does physical contact comfort you?
no
love is not over: ever had your heart broken?
:)
dead leaves: how loyal are you?
very
move: last time you cried?
I nearly cried at the airport leaving Japan because my best friend is staying there for college and I won’t be able to drive a street down to see her anymore, but I don’t cry much so I didn’t actually shed a tear.
I did however shed a single tear because of some gifs of jimin this morning
butterfly: most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen?
answered
run: do you like traveling? if so, where? what’s your dream vacation?
i love travelling and i actually just experienced my dream vacation in japan. I guess my next one would be korea
ma city: if you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?
seoul. I want to be an MV producer for idols
baepsae: do you vote and/or keep up with politics?
not especially, but I should bc i used to be a journalist
dope: what did you want to be when you were younger? how does it compare to what you want to be now?
i wanted to be a vet and now i’m going into film so there’s a pretty big gap
fire: are you a spontaneous person?
I’m an istp so yes
save me: your favorite place on earth?
im bad at choosing favorites, i’d like to think that i’m not tied down
young forever: what is one movie from your childhood that you will always treasure?
mulan
boys with fun: you’re going on a roadtrip with seven other people– dead, alive, fictional, real, famous, or not. who are they, and why?
sam, sarah, sara, kim taehyung, park jimin, xu minghao, and mark tuan
converse high: how many pairs of shoes do you own?
jesus wait lemme count
at least 14
whalien 52: weirdest thing that has ever happened to you? alternatively, weirdest dream you’ve ever had?
once after a 4th of july fireworks show my friend and i stopped at a gas station for drinks and this very obviously high dude in the car next to me said to me from his seat “yo dude u okay? u like… saw the paranoia i felt” and i had to reassure him that i was fine and i was going home soon
and i don’t like to think about my dreams bc theyre usually nightmares
house of cards: when was the last time you felt sexy?
like 2 years ago when i took the best selfies of my life
boy meets evil: have you ever committed a crime? if so, what was it? alternatively, what is the worst thing you have ever done?
i mean ive smoked weed
i snorted xanax once but after that night i decided to never do that again
blood, sweat, & tears: kinkiest kink you have?
i…. am not sure yall are ready for this information
begin: who are you most grateful for in your life?
i dont think i have an answer for this
lie: biggest fear?
abandonment. which lead to my fear of commitment and attachment
stigma: would you rather know the date of your death or the cause of your death?
cause
first love: do you believe in soulmates?
i’d like to
reflection: if you could tell your past self one thing, what would it be?
don’t go to the counselor
mama: are you good at giving advice?
not even a little bit
awake: if you had to be a flower, which flower would you be?
i’m not sure which I’d actually be but i love peonies
lost: how good are you with directions? do you get lost easily?
i’m pretty god with directions. I don’t usually get lost
cypher pt. 4: what do you do to treat yourself or relax?
i clean the shit out of my face
am i wrong: you wake up one morning in the hospital, knowing only your name and a single memory from your life. what is that memory?
damn well i wish i just lost all my memories
21st century girls: do you prefer texting, calling, or video chatting?
texting
2!3!: your favorite thing about bangtan?
how fucking weird and unapologetic they are
spring day: who do you miss right now?
my bed
not today: what are your procrastinating right now?
i need to pay rent and my class fees but i’m not
wings: on airplanes, do you prefer the window seat, the middle seat, or the aisle seat?
i like aisle seats for long flights and window seats for short flights
you never walk alone: how many people do you trust with your life?
maybe 2 ?
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Texts Between Strangers
Note: female/woman ‘reader’
---
Hey, it was really nice meeting you last night. Maybe we can grab lunch tomorrow? This is Cisco btw.
The text pops up on your phone screen as you're scrolling through social media. You've been lounging in bed on this rainy Saturday morning planning on doing absolutely nothing for the rest of the day but binge watch The Walking Dead and order thai take out later. You just stare at the text for a minute, blinking.
You definitely didn't give your number to anyone last night because all you did yesterday was pull a double shift at Jitters because they've been short staffed lately. A long day at work usually left you looking a bit wrecked so you're damn sure there wasn't anyone slipping their digits your way either.
This person has the wrong number.
You frown a little bit for them because you wonder if the wrong number was intentional. You've had to give a creepy dude the wrong number on purpose before just so he'd leave you alone. You finally reply after another minute.
Hi I didn't give my number to anyone. Sorry dude, they gave you a wrong number.
You figure that will be the end of that and roll out of bed only to shuffle your way to your comfy couch for some TV time. The notification on your cell pings again and you glance at it, brows raising when you see it's wrong number guy.
For real? This isn't [Girl's Name]? And you weren't at Stanley's Bar last night?
You've actually been to Stanley's a lot over the past couple years since you moved to Central City but last night was not one of them.
My name is definitely not [Girl's Name] and even though I love Stanley's for the sole fact drunk me can make peanut shell confetti rain everywhere during karaoke and not get in trouble, I for real wasn't there last night.
You felt like you were a tad on the sassy side with that text but he was a stranger who apparently one girl had already blown off so you figured he must not be worth much niceties anyways. You were always for girl power so even though you had no idea who [Girl's Name] was, you were going to go with her assessment of wrong number guy, what'd he say his name was? You scrolled up in the message feed, ah—Cisco.
Best peanuts in CC, read his next text which came with a peanut and praise hands emojis.
You laughed and said aloud “Agreed.” as you typed the same reply.
You're flicking through saved episodes of Walking Dead on your DVR, trying to find where you left off when another text comes through. You already have a suspicion its him again before even looking.
I must have heard her say the wrong numbers, it was so loud in there last night :(
Your brow furrows at this one. You remember why you avoid Stanley's on Friday nights. It's usually two for ones and they aways try to get local rock bands to come play. It tends to get too crowded, too hot and yes—too noisy, in there. You read over the text again and find yourself frowning along with his sad emoji.
Next time, you gotta just hand her your phone. No mistakes can be made then. Unless you have an embarassing wallpaper.
His reply is immediate, Pfft no way. It's followed by a screenshot of his actual phone background and a typed No shame along with it.
You're not sure if its a Harry Potter lightning bolt or a reference to Central City's local hero, The Flash. Either way, you're impressed. Wizards or Superheros, a cute guy could totally score your number if you peeped that wallpaper on his phone. Well, the jury is still out on if this guy is cute, you think.
You're right, that is legit. Maybe you did just hear the numbers wrong.
Of course I did. You make it sound like something else. You can't tell if his text was meant to sound cocky or confused.
You bite your lip and reply. Well...
??? is shot back instantly and you sigh.
You decide to just keep it real with him. Guys tend to be overbearing when picking up women. You sure you weren't reading her wrong?
I happen to read people's vibes quite accuratley. She totally was feelin all of this. There's even a smirking emoji.
Alight, cocky it is. You laugh and decide to challenge it. All of what? You send the eyes emoji along with it and wait patiently for him to chicken out.
That's when he sends a picture. Your phone drops into your lap and your mouth hangs open.
It's him.
It's the Jitters customer you've been crushing on for the past year. And that's his name? Cisco?Everytime he places an order to go he always thinks it's hilarious to use the name of a famous fictional character. You've been trying to psych yourself up for months just to work up the courage to ask him for his name and maybe out on a date.
Your mind races with all the daydreams and fantasies you've had starring him. They range from adorable ones where you accidentally bump into him, coffee spilling all over him and you both blushing profusely while you attempt to clean him up; to downright explicit ones where you're the only one on closing shift and he's the last customer so you lock the doors and ravish him right there in one of the plush accent chairs.
You take a smooth five minutes to freak the hell out.
What finally pulls you away from your panic is the muffled sound of your cellphone. You hurridely dig it out from the depths of the couch.
You pass out from all the hotness huh? Lol
You just stare at the message. All language escaping you in that moment. You hadn't attempted flirting since coming to live in Central City. You left a pretty toxic relationship behind and wanted a fresh start. You had spent the past couple years focusing on finishing your MA but now that graduation was right around the corner, you suppose you could actually start dabbling in that real life stuff again. How many hours had you spent making unrequeited heart eyes at a stranger in a coffee shop? You weren't too sure about the mechanics of fate and destiny or whatever.
“Of all the wrong numbers in all the towns in all the world he texts mine,” You blink, “Err, or something like that.” You say to your phone.
You're startled out of your dramatic monologue by another text from Cisco. My self confidence is increasingly deflating :|
Crap. You realize you haven't sent anything back to him in fifteen minutes. You just type fast and without much thought because you're scared if you think too hard on it you'll back out. Being behind a screen is supposed to make people a little more fearless, right?
Haha no it shouldn't. Its just that I've actually seen that handsome face before. :)
“That's only mildy creepy.” You say to yourself upon rereading your message.
That's... not creepy at all. Is his response, follwed by a How?
Well, we do live in the same city and I work at a popular hang out. You decide to tease him.
Oh, are you that redhead from Big Belly Burger? I told you the offer was flattering but I don't date high schoolers.
You have a good laugh at that before replying, Um, not a BBB employee or a high schooler. I assure you, you're texting a grown woman.
Oh yeah? A grown woman who can do whatever she wants? ;)
You think there's a Beyonce reference in there. Yes is your simple reply.
Idk. I could be getting catfished rn.
You scoff at that. If anyone could be getting catfished, it's me. You texted first.
True, but I genuinely did think you were someone else.
It's followed by another text. Hold up. On reinspection, I've actually have been incredibly generous. Ive given you my name, wallpaper AND my picture. The only thing I know is one place you don't work and that you're karaoke friendly. I think you have to pay some dues miss.
You scoff for a second but then realize you have withheld more than what he's given up in this conversation. You're nervous as you type back, What do you want?
Simple. Even trade. Name, wallpaper, and picture. Gimme.
Another text bubble appears, Please :D
You text him your name and hold your breath wondering if it will spark any memory. You have taken his order countless times at Jitters.
:D One down, two to go!
You sigh and nervously smile to yourself. You snap a screenshot of your phone background, which is just a quote thats partially obscured by your apps. You picked it to ground yourself, to make you never forget your self worth again. You haven't changed it since you moved to Central City. It simply reads 'I am too full of life to be half loved.' You send it on it's way and then go scrolling through your recent selfies to find a picture of yourself looking somewhat decent.
That's some sage advice. You should send me the actual pic so I can pin that to my quotes board on pinterest :)
You smile while sending over the original for him.
Thanks! Now last but not least...
You've picked a picture you took right before going out to a show a couple of weeks ago. You felt confident that night because of your new show stopping outfit and the fact that your hair did absolutely what you wanted it to do. You held your breath as you sent the picture, knowing that for sure he'd have to know who you were. The awkward, babbling barrista that often times tripped over her own two feet.
A minute went by without a reponse. Your nerves were catapulting all over the place while you just sat there and stared at your phone.
Finally a new message notification pinged and you swallowed hard as you opened it. Then, your heart stopped for a second.
Its you. The text simply reads.
What's that supposed to mean? You think. Before you can form a reply, he's sent another text.
I mean, you work at Jitters. I've definitely seen that beautiful face before. :) He mimics your reply to him earlier.
You feel a blush blooming across your face along with what your sure is a goofy smile. Yeah, surprise haha
Would it be weird to say my original question still stands?
You blink in confusion. Excuse me?
It's just that, I've always thought you were cute and you laugh at all my made up names when I order. It's a beautiful laugh btw. You're mouth has dropped open and you just reread the message a few times and then reply.
Hold up. Why haven't you asked me out before?
I've um... had some bad luck in the past with Jitters barristas. Figured I'd steer clear for a while.
And now?
Well now fate has given me your number so I figure I should just go with it :D
You bite your lip to try and control the goofy smile that's forming. Lunch sounds great.
Your phone slips free of your graps and you look up to stare out the window. The sky is clear and bright.
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