#and i'm still not over him
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Kim Kitsuragi is a fascinating character because there's not that much fun or interesting or compelling about him. And yet somehow over the course of playing Disco Elysium the game rewires your fucking brain around him. He's the middest man you've ever seen in both appearance and personality but at some point he says something kind to you or something critical of you and you feel like you just got hit by a truck and you need his approval like you need oxygen and like how tf did this happen. what are you
#disco elysium#de#kim kitsuragi#i have an interdisciplinary degree in game design and psychology and i'm still unsure how they pulled this off#my best guess is that the early game beats you over the head with how much you suck and everyone hates you#and this allows for any genuine praise from another character to feel massive#the fact that he doesn't take pity on you ever contributes to praise from him feeling earned. like you CAN get better#whereas pity from lena or judit#while comforting#doesn't do anything to alleviate how pathetic you feel
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senshi fans: learning how to make nutritious meals for themselves
laios fans: down bad
marcille fans: lesbianism
chilchuck fans: putting that man in situations
#this is what I've observed over the past few weeks#it's great#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#senshi#laois touden#marcille donato#chilchuck#2000+ notes later and I'm starting to think i read y'all to filth#with exception to senshi fans also being down for him#update at 9000 notes: you can like laois for autism reasons and still be down bad#some of y'all in the tags and fics are down bad for laois in mental way#like you want him to be real so you can do brain crazy with him do you understand
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I think one of the funniest things about the Sabzeruz event is that the devs choose to go with Candace, Traveler, and Paimon having a whole "Ooh, two mysterious men are going into an alley to have a 'private' conversation; they must be bad guys!" only to then go "Oh just kidding, it was only Alhaitham and Kaveh doing typical Alhaitham and Kaveh things."
Except the "Alhaitham and Kaveh" thing in question this time was talking about Mehrak, a sentient robot that Kaveh built using absolutely forbidden technology, and which he then whole-heartedly willed would develop a consciousness of its own, violating one of the central taboos of his nation's governing agency, committing what amounts to an inherent and extreme felony punishable by law.
Alhaitham and Kaveh: Listen, we're not bad guys discussing illegal activity here. We're just two men having a private, personal conversation. Happens all the time.
Paimon, Candace, and Traveler: Oh cool, they're not doing a crime; they're just gay.
But they were, in fact, doing a crime.
#genshin impact#alhaitham#kaveh#haikaveh#kavetham#mehrak#I still can't get over how Kaveh is friends with the chief of police#and living with the former Acting Grand Sage#and Tighnari had to completely hide Karkata's existence with ARSON to get rid of the evidence#but everyone in the entirety of Sumeru just said#ya know#let's let Kaveh have this one#and no one blinks an eye at Mehrak#who is obviously capable of reasoning and rational thought at this point#Light of Kshahrewar is truly the favorite#everyone in Sumeru has one exception#and that exception is Kaveh#let's be real#the reason no one is saying shit about Mehrak#is no one wants to deal with Scribe “I overthrow the government when people displease me” Alhaitham#bro really said “Upset Kaveh at your own peril”#“Only I'M allowed to upset him”#the last people who made Kaveh sad have been sentenced to living in caves and subsisting off mushrooms for the rest of their lives#and this was seen as mercy on Alhaitham and Cyno's part
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was this anyone else's first thought, or
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#anglerfish#YES hiking jade let's GO#send him up the mountain to look at some funky mushrooms#love how delicately he's holding his lantern with his little pinky out#ooh la la monsieur mastermind#now what are the odds we're getting gargoyle-club malleus next#probably not good but LOOK let me DREAM#i also very much want the equestrian club. GIVE ME HORSE BOYS#actually just give me everyone i want to see everyone#man though the june schedule looking pretty light over here in jp#which always makes me think something big is coming up...#whenever they pull a training camp on us it instantly sends my brain into overthinking mode#chances are good it's more main story though!#we've been averaging every-other-month story updates for a while now and the consistency is nice#i'm still not over the eight months between the end of episode 5 and the start of episode 6...#(IT'S FINE i want them to take all the time they need! i am just impatient)#(i will happily wait but i will be rolling around on the ground the entire time)
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Learning that fans hated Applejack and called her "boring" is crazyyy to me because I genuinely, unironically believe AJ's the most complex character in the main six.
Backstory-wise, she was born into a family of famers/blue collar workers who helped found the town she lives in. She grew up a habitual liar until she had the bad habit traumatized outta her. She lost both her parents and was orphaned at a young age, having to step up as her baby sister's mother figure. She's the only person in the main gang who's experienced this level of loss and grief (A Royal Problem reveals that AJ dreams about memories of being held by her parents as a baby). She moved to Manhattan to live with her wealthy family members, only to realize she'll never fit in or be accepted, even amongst her own family. The earlier seasons imply she and her family had money problems too (In The Ticket Master, AJ wants to go to the gala to earn money to buy new farm equipment and afford hip surgery for her grandma).
Personality-wise, she's a total people-pleaser/steamroller (with an occasional savior complex) who places her self worth on her independence and usefulness for other people, causing her to become a complete workaholic. In Applebuck Season, AJ stops taking care of herself because of her obsessive responsibilities for others and becomes completely dysfunctional. In Apple Family Reunion, AJ has a tearful breakdown because in she thinks she dishonored her family and tarnished her reputation as a potential leader –– an expectation and anxiety that's directly tied to her deceased parents, as shown in the episode's ending scene. In The Last Roundup, AJ abandons her family and friends out of shame because believes she failed them by not earning 1st place in a rodeo competition. She completely spirals emotionally when she isn't able to fulfill her duties toward others. Her need to be the best manifests in intense pride and competitiveness when others challenge her. And when her pride's broken, she cowers and physically hides herself.
Moreover, it's strongly implied that AJ has a deep-seated anger. The comics explore her ranting outbursts more. EQG also obviously has AJ yelling at and insulting Rarity in a jealous fit just to hurt her feelings (with a line that I could write a whole dissection on). And I'm certain I read in a post somewhere that in a Gameloft event, AJ's negative traits are listed as anger.
Subtextually, a lot of these flaws and anxieties can be (retroactively) linked to her parents' death, forcing her to grow up too quickly to become the adult/caregiver of the family (especially after her big brother becomes semiverbal). Notice how throughout the series, she's constantly acting as the "mom friend" of the group (despite everything, she manages to be the most emotionally mature of the bunch). Notice how AJ'll switch to a quieter, calmer tone when her friends are panicking and use soothing prompts and questions to talk them through their emotions/problems; something she'd definitely pick up while raising a child. Same with her stoicism and reluctance at crying or releasing emotions (something Pinkie explicitly points out). She also had a childhood relationship with Rara (which, if you were to give a queer reading, could easy be interpreted as her first 'aha' crush), who eventually left her life. (Interestingly enough, AJ also has an angry outburst with Rara for the same exact reasons as with EQG Rarity; jealous, upset that someone else is using and changing her). It's not hard to imagine an AJ with separation anxiety stemming from her mother and childhood friend/crush leaving. I'm also not above reading into AJ's relationship with her little sister (Y'all ever think about how AB never got to know her parents, even though she shares her father's colors and her mother's curly hair?).
AJ's stubbornness is a symptom of growing up too quickly as well. Who else to play with your baby sister when your brother goes nonverbal (not to discount Big Mac's role in raising AB)? Who else to wake up in the middle of the night to care for your crying baby sister when your grandma needs her rest? When you need to be 100% all the time for your family, you tend to become hard-stuck with a sense of moral superiority. You know what's best because you have to be your best because if you're aren't your best, then everything'll inevitably fall apart and it'll be your fault. And if you don't know what's best –– if you've been wrong the whole time –– that means you haven't been your best, which means you've failed the people who rely on you, which means you can't fulfill your role in the family/society, which makes you worthless . We've seen time and time again how this compulsive need to be right for the sake of others becomes self-destructive (Apple Family Reunion, Sound of Silence, all competitions against RD). We've seen in The Last Roundup how, when no longer at her best, AJ would rather remove herself from her community than confront them because she no longer feels of use to them.
But I guess it is kinda weird that AJ has "masculine" traits and isn't interested in men at all. It's totally justified that an aggressively straight, misogynistic male fandom would characterize her as a "boring background character." /s
At the time of writing this, it's 4:46AM.
#mlp#yeah i wrote this last night during insomnia.#yeah i know an embarrassing amount of crap about this kids show#but whatever it's my hyperfixation i'll store as much useless information as i want!!!#i'm gay and neurodivergent i have an excuse#in case you needed more proof that aj's my favorite character#personal#delete later#unless you like this analysis stuff#i get why they didn't reveal aj's parent's death until way later and why they didn't do much with it but i wish they did#cuz narratively there could've been so much material with aj's grief. like. i feel like we gloss over the fact that she lost her#mother and father as a teenager#i tried keeping my personal hcs out of this to keep it unbiased#but i'll put some in the tags#involving rarijack –– i think aj can be (but not always) very self-conscious about her relationship with rarity#anxieties that she's not the right fit or that rarity will move away and leave her some day or that another woman will take her attention#(like in rollercoaster of friendship?? nudge nudge??). basic seperation anxiety stuff#long post#regarding applebloom whenever i think about her and her parents i think about that scene in steven universe where steven looks up at#a portrait of his mother and openly wonders what kind of sack lunches she would've made for him. that episode still fucks me up
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mourning black and the death of ideals
#i haven't moved on from this yet. btw. i'm still here#finally decided to draw the thought i've been ruminating over for days on end bc it's like a parasite eating away my brain#stated this on the initial post i made days ago but there's just smt so gut wrenching and sickening#about how dazai will have worn black exactly twice in his life: once as a member of the mafia and now at kunikida's funeral#a color that initially signified devotion to the mafia and his demon prodigy alias now signifies his grief#him having to wear black again at the funeral of another doomed fatalist who chose his heart over his survival. his own partner.#kunikida's death being so reminiscent of the tragedy that initially caused him to defect and flee#and everything tying together full circle and effectively breaking him#asagiri rly said fuck knkdz it's doppover we lost gang 😭😭😭#why did bro leave that fucking notebook behind#fool. do you know that angst potential you have left me to work with?#love never won in bsd. it lay dead and festering#i don't know how much longer i can keep saying i miss them. i'm going to kill myself if he doesn't come back#i've never wanted something to be death bait so desperately#bungou stray dogs#bungo stray dogs#bsd#dazai osamu#osamu dazai#kunikidazai#knkdz#kunizai#(??? technically. its implied anyway)#lotus draws
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merlin magic reveal fic where arthur asks “why didn’t you tell me?” and merlin says, mirthless smile and haunted eyes “all my dreams end in fire. fire and burning and dying”
#I just need a fic where merlin has an actual honest to god fear of fire#and the thought of burning in a pyre haunts him#it’s always a very passing remark in fics so I want to see how it’d be explored#and how horrified arthur would be over it#i'm talking graphic depictions of merlin burning in the middle of the square#i'm talking merlin waking up with a scream lodged in his throat because he can still smell the smoke and his own burning flesh#i'm talking merlin's biggest fear being arthur picking up a torch and lighting his pyre#looking as merlin screams and burns and screams and dies with nothing but hate in his eyes#i'm talking merlin being honestly fucking terrified of dying by fire#anyways#merlin#bbc merlin#merlin angst#arthur pendragon#merthur#merlin x arthur
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A major change to the past
#bill cipher#gravity falls#the book of bill#time baby#baby bill cipher#stanford pines#stanley pines#gravity falls fanart#sony sketch#twptwp#I wanted draw baby bil#my friend send him to me and said “this is you”#correct#Please no major book of bill spoilers I'm still waiting it to arrive#I ordered over a week ago and have to wait untill the end of the month because Europe#billford
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Long-Haired Obito Art Request for @lucynda ! Your ask was a bit too long for me to post so i'm answering it in this way ;D This version of Obito is like...one of the most vicious and brutal renditions of him ._.
#uchiha obito#obito uchiha#obito#uchiha#zetsu#guruguru#akatsuki#naruto#naruto shippuden#my art#fan art#long hair#tobi#i'm referring to the way Obito murked the Uchiha Clan along with Itachi that police station scene stays in my head rent-free#and how he ended Kid Itachi's teammate right in front of Itachi's eyes as described in the Novel..#like the anime didn't show the full intensity of that scene as described within the Itachi Novel Obito was literally oozing with blood lust#It definitely seems like this is one of Obito's more angrier unhinged phases to me#personally i still prefer short-hair Obito over Long-Hair 'bito because Long-Hair bito looks too much like Madara :')) and less like obito#but i still really like this version of him too!#anywhos i hope you like it!!#Thank you for the interesting Art Request~
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I'm only asking this because you said you want to draw some Billford and now I'm thinking about it. It seems to me that Bill would bring Ford extremely upsetting presents (like a cat) and Ford (like a cat owner) would be disgusting/horrified, but charmed despite himself. Am I correct? Also, would the same thing happen in reverse
Yeah that's basically where they're at in canon lol. Buuut my goal's to write them struggling & clawing past their toxic history to reach a place where they work.
And when they work, I think usually Bill gives Ford gifts that should horrify him, but that he only finds charming, because these two freaks are on the same wavelength. And same goes in reverse.
(there's another five pages under the cut)
In billford as "toxic exes who get under each other's skin because they know each other so well," having them constantly bickering and getting on each other's nerves works just fine. But when they're actually a couple, I like to see them like each other. Enjoy each other's company and do things for each other that they appreciate.
Even if it's batshit by outsiders' standards, it needs to work for them. Bill knows when Ford would love to be cursed and Ford sees weird gross body parts and knows "Bill would want this."
#billford#grunkle ford#ford pines#bill cipher#human bill cipher#(we're still a million chapters from moments like this in my fic... but that's why I'm drawing them)#(bc I wanna get there lol)#gravity falls#gravity falls fanart#gravity falls comic#fanart#my art#(my favorite bit is the two pages where Bill leans all over Ford and Ford just lets him)#(plz reblog this I've been working on it for a month)#anonymous#ask
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Why do I keep seeing transmascs and trans men insisting or implying that all trans men are "female socialized," or "understand the female experience," or "navigated the world as a woman." Because yeah, sure, that can be true for some people. especially if you weren't gnc at all as a kid and didn't crack your egg until well into adulthood, it makes sense.
But they don't stop at saying they had that experience. It always comes with an addendum that trans men, as a group, all can relate to this experience. I don't know about the entirety of my demographic, but I never got even a little bit of what some of them talk about. I didn't even believe that women were scared of going out at night until I kept consistently seeing them say it, online or wherever, for years. I never realized catcalling was a thing until I saw some women complaining about it on reddit.
But they posit it as some sort of, you're safer than cis men, right? You know what it's like? Which, on top of being patently, demonstrably false in the case of myself and many other trans men, holds some unpleasant and often outright hostile implications about trans women. And they always deny it, but if you can't even conceptualize someone like me who grew up gnc, and never got the bulk (or any?) of whatever we consider to be 'female socialization,' what does that say about what you think trans girls went through, growing up? I don't want to speak for them, as I've never experienced that firsthand, but I can guarantee that (if you're even a little bit obviously trans) people don't treat you like a cis kid of the opposite gender. By and large, they don't get treated like cis boys.
It just makes me mad that we're taking this inaccurate framework that (ever so conveniently) puts trans people into the box of our assumed birth gender, and trying to fancy it up and use it with a faux-progressive veneer; never mind the way that transphobes use it to bar trans women from being athletes, or using the bathroom, or having access to any gendered resources they need. It would be bad enough to try and dust it off and use it even if it were largely accurate, due to the aforementioned connections to outright transphobia, but it literally is patently false. Not in all cases, obviously, but why are we trying to revamp this untrue, inaccurate generalization and pretend that we can make it 'trans-inclusive?'
#o.#trans#transphobia#transmisogyny#I may or may not be talking about a specific post I saw that made me irritated but I didnt wanna get in an argument with internet strangers#sorry guys I'm still heated over freaking collin allred capitulating to ted cruz and throwing trans girls under the bus bc he didnt have the#guts to stick to his morals#and called them ''this idiotic business with boys in girls sports'' or some crap#as if trans girls don't deserve to play the sports they love. like I imagine if they blocked trans men from being physicists or something#and I just wasn't able to pursue the career I want? that would destroy me#and I still had to vote for him because the other options were ted cruz and some freaking libertarian.#sorry thats all tangential but can we not use the same rhetoric that all these politicians do as an excuse to kick trans women out of public#life PLEASE 🙏#...also I really hate the Popular Transmasc Ideology that says that we all experience life as basically the same as a cis woman & never have#to navigate having male privilege & being an ally to women#and all have some sort of Innate Connection to femaleness or womanhood or whatever bc 'obviously' we all grew up just like girls do#ugh#this one's going out there sans editing so dont yell at me if I worded smth weird please 🙏
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Good morning, Sleepyhead.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#'WWX was asleep for 4 days' is an incorrect factoid.#The average WWX sleeps for 8 hours. The PD-MDZS WWX who was asleep for 40 comics and 4 months is an outlier.#We are back to present day! I have missed drawing them!#Ah...the contrast between how the flashback ended (cold and distrustful) to how wwx wakes up (warm and watched over)...#The gap between the past and present is very important. Not just in this story but in our lives too.#The past can still hurt and it doesn't just go away with time as some say. It is the power of realizing that things have changed.#We can't get the good back. The bad memories have concluded. Those live somewhere else now.#It is hard to realize that you have to live for today and tomorrow. The past is so loud.#For WWX it is realizing that despite the mistrust in the past - He really does have faith that LWJ will be there for him.#It is the reflection of knowing that you changed and will keep changing and that change is good and kind sometimes.#But more importantly...and this I really do mean with all my heart:#It will all end up okay in the end. Even after the worst day. The most painful losses. You will get through it.#What feels like a breaking point is truthfully just another step you have to take. You'll get through it even though it feels like the end.#There are wonderful things you have yet to see. Friends you have yet to meet.#Even if it hurts so badly...one day it just aches. Someday you'll go a few weeks not remembering that it ever hurt.#Oh and because my izutsumi comic revealed many people were in need of hearing this:#You are loved. Right now. You are so loved right now. We just forget to tell each other that.#Go tell the people you love that they matter to you. I'm assigning you homework!!! You are graded on completion.
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in the tub with austinshow (ft. ludwig) 3/29/24
#ludwig#ludwig ahgren#mine: gifs#mine: ludwig#sorry for making (more than) 6 gifs of a man half naked in a bathtub do u still think i'm hot#i also giffed him and austin feeling each other's biceps but they turned out super scuffed for some reason?? gonna try to remake them#plus i have another two i'm gonna make#GIF DROUGHT IS OVER !!!!!!
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i love your riddle design so much, he's so pointy and british. so gracious. do you think he would enjoy a brazilian goiabada
thank you! ❤️🖤❤️ it's just. important to me on a level I can't explain that Riddle have an extremely pointy nose that he can stick into everyone else's business.
also goiabada is sweet and fruity and red, I think he would like it very much indeed!
not me stealth-editing because I forgot his antenna whoops
#art#twisted wonderland#me: riddle's nose is important to me (draws him without a nose)#a study in contrasts?#regardless it is my power as a fanartist to let riddle eat sweets and by god i'm going to use it#i also love british riddle. briddle. it's just RIGHT.#i think about how someday the anime will come out and get dubbed and riddle is going to have Generic Anime Boy Voice#instead of the most over-the-top prim little benedict cumberbatch accent like he does in my HEART#and the world shall be poorer for it. alas.#i also think it would be VERY funny if malleus had a super exaggerated french accent because something something french fairytale#i am probably alone in this however#(sorry still trying to catch up on everything!)#(all of my focus has been going towards Deadlines so hopefully i will have space to think...eventually :')#(i still have some main story things cookin' and i JUST finished tsumsted 3: the squeakquel so uhhh)#(there may be a bit of a flood at some point. you've been warned.)
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yes, yes, boba fett finds it strange and uncomfortable when people can see his face and this is one of the major reasons he almost never removes his helmet (in the expanded universe anyway), but another factor that i think isn't explored nearly enough is just how much his helmet shapes how he sees the world. it grants him 360° vision, lets him interface with his weapon systems and slave I, and automatically dampens loud noises and dims bright lights. imagine going through the vast majority of your life seeing the world through that lens and then suddenly taking it away. removing his helmet for any significant length of time likely isn't just uncomfortable for him but downright disorienting.
#boba fett#boba fett meta#so much is made of how mandalorian helmets have all these powerful‚ often perception-altering features#and how many mandalorians spend the majority of their lives wearing them#i'm surprised there aren't more references to the difficulties such mandos might have adjusting to NOT wearing them#not just socially but like on a sensory level#there's one description in the boba fett junior novels that i really love#where bitty!boba gets his helmet knocked off his head by another bounty hunter#and the barrage of light and sound is compared to water being poured over his face#like it's that jarring to him#and that's when he was still a kid and hadn't yet experienced literal years of wearing his helmet every day!#so imagine what it's like for him when he's an adult making that transition#star wars#mandalorians
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yeah sure therapy is nice but teen soukoku is faster and a lot cheaper
#LITERALLY STILL IN SHAMBLES OVER 109 THIS IS HOW IM COPING#thinking abt how much harder teen skk hits bc that's when chuuya started using corruption and they had to learn to trust each other#like with their lives.#not ''hey dazai i'm lending you five bucks so you can get me a coke from the vending machine i trust you'll give me the change''#although i'm sure that's happened and dazai runs off with the change despite being explicitly told not to bc he's an ass#anyway despite not having mutual understanding or even sympathy for the other person they entrusted their lives to each other#also the fact that chuuya isn't likely human but so desperately wants to be and dazai is the tether to his humanity#likewise how dazai was so traumatized to the point where he couldn't feel human#but meeting chuuya made him think living was worth a shot#the parallels are paralleling#bungou stray dogs#bungo stray dogs#nakahara chuuya#chuuya nakahara#soukoku#skk#lotus draws
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