#and i'm part of three college clubs

[bakingrecipe]

Hi aaj kal bahut kam dash mein dikh rahe ho

life is so good at keeping me busy

[hoshigray]

𝐇𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐋𝐢𝐤𝐞, 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐇𝐨𝐥𝐝 | satoru gojō

𝐒𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: Is it possible to wish to be in the embrace of someone who makes you want to throw them off a cliff? You seem to think so, and the same goes for Gojo. But alas, good things always come to an end, even when not meant to be...

𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬: Gojo x fem/afab! reader - explicit content; minors DNI - modern + college AU - frenemies to lovers + mutual pining - Gojo and reader are at least age 20 - implied fwb relationship - catching/awakening feelings - oral (m! receiving) - ball massaging + sucking - sex in a shared room; college dorms (alone) - cowgirl position on a chair - breast fondling + sucking + nipple play - protected sex (psa: wrap it up, or get tf up) - pet names (baby, cutie, pretty, princess) - heavy depiction of a blowjob - cameos: Haibara and Ijichi - fluff + angst; misunderstandings - humor bc i'm [not] funny.

𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 7.6k

𝐀𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐍𝐨𝐭𝐞: second part, let's goooo!! i loved ur support and comments from the first story, so hope y'all are excited for this part :DDD and ty so so so MUCH for 5.5k like??? i kiss you on cheek, every single on of you, hehehe~

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“If you’re not gonna help, then leave my dorm!”

“Ehhhh, hell no! It’s cold as fuck outside; you want me to freeze to death?”

“They’re…still going at it.”

“Yeah…give it a minute, and we’ll just go to the library without them?”

It’s coming down to the last week of January; university students are finally settling in with their new schedules and getting used to the groove of the spring semester. Or some run around trying to keep up with the new semesters and the change of weather already getting on people’s nerves, wanting nothing more than spring to come quickly.

Three weeks in, and you already have stuff to do, one of them being an argumentative presentation assigned by Professor Yaga in your Contemporary Issues class. You and three other people are tasked to find sources for a topic issue you find interesting and then present a discussion-based presentation on two sides of the topic (two people in favor and two people against).

Unfortunately, the groups were to be randomly assigned. Luckily, two friends you knew in the class, Haibara and Ijichi, were picked to work alongside you! However, the bad part was that another person you knew was assigned to work with you, and he happens to be the guy getting on your last nerves right now, sitting on your couch while clicking through the television channels with the remote. 

Your roommates weren’t home today. The club fair was occurring at the quad, so Mei Mei and Utahime had to go out and represent their clubs for the afternoon. Shoko is having an intense study session with Geto for an exam on the first of February, so they’re at the library now. 

That leaves you alone at your dorm, using this as a perfect opportunity to invite your group over to work on the project. 

“You can freeze your nuts off and become the next Jack Frost for all I care; if you’re not going to do your part of the work, get out!”

Well, minus you yelling at your partner, who clicks his teeth before turning to you. His round sunglasses shone from the light reflected from the living room windows.

Satoru Gojo was your number one nemesis within these campus grounds; this was a known fact to everyone, especially the other group members who nervously examined you two bicker. Being in the same space as him is enough to make you wish you could pull your hair out or put him in the nastiest headlock you could do. Worse, being assigned to the same group as him for your project almost made you want to rip your ears off. 

But you had to suck it up; at least you were the first group to start a presentation. Better now than worry about it later, right? 

“Pssh, fine, I’ll get up and—Oh! Wait, you guys have Digimon on Hulu? Ahhh, sick!” 

Nevertheless, you can’t say that when your supposed partner acts like a child glued to your TV screen instead of doing the work he promised to do. You grit your teeth with a twitching brow, “Why you…”

Across from the common area was the kitchen, where Haibara and Ijichi sat at the dining table. The two sophomores could do nothing but feel the tension between you and Gojo grow with every passing second, suffocating the younger duo. Haibara eyes Ijichi from across the table and whispers, “Wanna make a run for it now?”

The black-haired second-year didn’t reply, only a hurried nod before the two grabbed their coats and stuffed their laptops back into their backpacks. The sound of their zippers alerts your ears, turning to them to question, “Huh? Where are you two going?” 

Haibara takes it upon himself to deliver a half-lie as he zips up his jacket. “On second thought, Ijichi and I are thinking of taking the shuttle to the library to work instead.”

Huh? The library? Were they leaving because of the belligerence between you and Gojo? God, you hoped not. “Wait, you guys don’t have to do that. I already made you guys walk all this way here; it’d be rough to have you leave for somewhere else…”

Ijichi comes with the assist after putting the sling of his messenger bag around his shoulder. “It’s okay, Y/n. We found material from the library we could use as sources, so we’re heading up there to take some notes while they’re there.” 

“Yup!” Haibara exclaims in agreement, and the two walk past you to put on their shoes by the front door. “Maybe you guys can find sources of your own while we’re gone, and then we can converse and share what we found when we come back. Sounds good?” 

“I suppose so…” you couldn’t shake the feeling that they were leaving to avoid being in the same room as you and Gojo. The guilt is hard to endure since you didn’t mean to make the younger boys uncomfortable. “See you guys, then.”

“Cya!” And with that, the door closes on their way out, leaving you and Gojo alone in your apartment. 

Well, this is just great; you’ve driven your group members and friends away and are now stuck with the nuisance of a partner who still keeps his attention on the television. It takes everything in your power not to pop a vein. But with one calm breath, you steady yourself and stand tall. 

You walk in front of the TV, blocking it from Gojo’s view. The white-haired boy throws his hands up in exasperation, but you couldn’t care less. “What’s the big idea?” He questions you as if he has a right to at this moment. 

You cross your arms across your chest with narrow eyes. “Haibara and Ijichi just left.”

“Uhh, yeah, I heard the door,” he maneuvers his body to try and see the children’s show blocked by your figure. “Doesn’t have to do with me—“

“It does have to do with you.” You interrupt him, taking two steps and bending to stare him down. Your face is a foot away from his. “You’re supposed to be here to work with Haibara on the ’no’ part of the argument while me and Ijichi do our part. You’ve only been here for thirty minutes, and the only thing you’ve done successfully is take off your shoes at the door and read your manga books on the couch. 

Gojo chuckles – oh, how you hated his laugh – as he puts his hands behind his head, spreading his long legs from their crossed form. “You heard them, no? They’re going to research on their own and then come back. Besides, you know I’m not one to start stuff right away. I’m a procrastinator, remember?”

“You’re annoying; that’s what you are.” You straighten up with a heavy sigh.  God, I wish Utahime and Shoko were here. They’d help me out with this white garbage…

“Ahhh, lighten up, Y/n. It’s not like the presentation is on Monday; we got until Friday to come up with everything.”

“Yeah, I’m aware of that, smartass. And you’re right: I do know you. And I know you tend to do things at the last fucking minute. But not this time!” You watch him try to put his feet up on the coffee table, and you quickly intervene by kicking them off. 

“Tch. Look, you knew what you were getting into being partnered with me. And relax; those two said they’ll be back to discuss the material later. They already left – nothing I can do about it.”

Your hands rest at your hips, tapping your foot with visible frustration. “Oh? And I wonder why they left in the first place, Gojo. Mind telling me how?”

He quirks up a brow with a smug grin — a telling sign that you’d get ticked off with whatever he’s about to say. “I don’t know, Y/n. Why not ask the nagging control freak talking to me right now, huh? Maybe their short height and angry temper are affecting the mood of those around them to be miserable like them.” 

You almost did it — your hands nearly gave into your intrusive thoughts and were about to lunge at the snow-haired guy’s neck to wring around like a rag doll. But you played it off with a clap, rubbing the palms together to distract your temporary violent thoughts.

You sucked your teeth and turned on your heel. “Forget it. I’m gonna go take a nap.”

He scoffs, “Good, maybe your tiny brain needs it to calm down.”

“Choke and die, Gojo!” You say down the hall, already at the door of your shared bedroom. Before slamming the door shut, Gojo’s patronizing laughter can be heard to your dismay. With gritted teeth, you march to your bed to throw yourself on the mattress. 

“Ughhh. That Satoru Gojo,” you curse his name under your breath as if he’d hear you through the walls. “So unserious…”

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

To be quite honest with himself, Gojo doesn’t necessarily hate you.

The white-haired boy lies on his side on Utahime’s bed, watching you nap. He did knock on the door – believe him, he did. He even gave you the good old ten-second rule, waiting for your response. But then you didn’t, which gave him the initiative to waltz in and see you in your slumber.

You slept so peacefully; your face at peace, and your faint snores were the only things his ears picked up on. It was as if your little nagging show from earlier was hard to comprehend when seeing your tranquil state in front of him. It used to be rare to see you like this. Keywords: used to be.

For the past two to three weeks, your relationship with Gojo has become more…intimate. Ever since he took your first kiss and drew your virgin curtains, the two of you have gotten a little closer than before — both platonically and physically. Something that Gojo never thought he’d experience with you, his tiny, cute frenemy. 

Gojo has known you since freshman year; you were two in the same enrichment group to prepare you to transition into college life. Personally, he wasn’t much for the program; he found it a waste of time, a mandatory prerequisite that he felt he didn’t need. He’s all about experience, wanting nothing more than to get on with his day, go to classes, hang with friends, and repeat. 

“Hello, my name is Y/n. It’s nice to meet you all!”

And then came you, the person sitting across from him at the round table your group would always meet at. He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t enamored by you the second he saw you. Gojo rarely finds someone who could easily pull his eyes to them — not saying the girls who’d usually crowd and admire him weren’t pretty. There was something about you that kept him wanting to know more – to engage more – about you. 

One thing he knew from you was that you carried your character with pride. Your achievements, your personality, your kindness, and your mannerisms — all of which were displayed elegantly and were a breath of fresh air to look at. You stood out to him more than all the other kids in the group, his eyes always finding a way to steer from the professor’s advice to your alluring, listening face. 

Another thing Gojo liked about you was that you weren’t afraid to stand your ground, especially when discussing with your peers or him. Sure, you were always respectful and would respect other people’s arguments. But, God, the way you said things so constructed and nuanced, it had the tall other glued to you whenever you spoke.

He’s not going to lie; he’ll admit that he’d try to tick you off and get you to get a little angry with him when it came to arguing. He couldn’t help it. He just liked the thought of you layering out of your poised appearance to the point you’d glare at him whenever you saw him in the halls. And it had him giddy knowing he’s the one that made you angry because you looked cute. 

And that was the other thing he really liked about you. The more you two interacted, argued, hung out with his friends, or attended classes together, the more Gojo’s fascination for you turned into that of a school-boy crush. He wouldn’t admit to anyone of this (minus Geto and Shoko if his life depended on it) because it certainly wasn’t something to be known. He was okay with what you two had right now, being the friend who loves to push your buttons to see you nag at him. 

That was until you two started sleeping together. Because holy fuck, the past weeks you two have been sneaking time to have each other’s bodies close made Gojo’s mind go crazy. So fucking crazy like the feeling of you on him is borderline addicting. Your whiny cries calling out to him when he scrapes your sweet spots, your nails scrape on his chest, your half-lidded eyes when you look at him, or how you whisper his name only for him to hear.

This was the kind of relationship you two brewed, a secret thing only between you two. And Gojo was satisfied keeping it like this because it was what you wanted. No need to flaunt it around; it was no one’s business. Besides, he likes having you to himself, seeing a side of you that only he could imagine and experience.

The sensations of your body under his touch, the various tunes of your voice, and the beauty exhibited in your gaze. It was all addicting. You were addicting.

“Who told you to lie on my roommate’s bed? You know she’ll kill you if she ever saw you.” 

It was so addicting that he didn’t even notice you awake until you spoke to him, the erotic memories of you clouding his brain dissipating at the indication of your voice. He smirks, “Oh, I’ll be fine; not like she can hurt me with her tiny self.”

You’re too groggy to roll your eyes, sighing as you turn to your side to face him from across the room. “How long was I out for?”

“Almost an hour,” he replies, switching to sit criss-cross on Utahime’s bed. “I got bored watching TV and knocked.”

“How long have you been in here?”

“Maybe twenty minutes?”

“Just watching me sleep?”

“Yeah.”

You let out a scoff, shaking your head. “Weirdo.”

He snickers at you for recognizing his silliness. “Whaaat? There’s not much to do aside from looking at you. I got bored of the TV.”

“What about your manga?”

“Got bored of that, too.”

“Anyone on your socials that you’d wanna talk to? Girls? Friends? Your teammates?”

“Mmm, nah, none I’d wanna talk to right now.”

Your brows furrowed. “What do you mean?”

“Hmm?”

“What do you mean ‘right now’? You make it seem like I’m keeping you from interacting with your outside life. If you’re bored, talk with whoever you want. Maybe bother Geto…No, nevermind, he’d probably be annoyed since he’s studying.”

Gojo examines you, silently removing himself from your roommate’s bed and treading towards yours. He takes off his sunglasses and places them on top of your dresser before sitting on his knees on the floor. He rests his hands and chin on the edge of your bed, his sky-blue eyes locked in with yours. God, you were so beautiful to look at. 

“I meant that I don’t want to talk to anybody.” Now that he’s closer to you, his voice dials to a whisper. “Not when I got you here to myself.”

He notices your brows drawing upward at the sentence. “To yourself?”

“Mhmm,” he hums, bringing a forefinger to trace your brow. A sensual touch not to startle you. “Just you and me.”

You give him a look as if you think he’s trying to pull something. “Don’t tell me you were making me mad at you earlier just so Haibara and Ijichi could leave, and I’d be stuck with you.”

His smile broadens with every word, his dimples out to see. “No, although I hate that I didn’t think of that myself.” His hand goes to your cheek for his thumb to stroke gently. “Would it have been a bad thing if I did?”

You don’t reply, only placing your hand on his. Your eyes are still on his blue orbs, and – you don’t know this because Gojo has the perfect view of you – the light from the window made them shine charmingly as it highlighted your face. 

“No…I don’t think so,” you murmur, gaze gradually venturing down to his lips. “I like being around you…Satoru.”

He heard his name leave your lips, an invitation to what he wants to do, his eyes fixated on your lips before closing them and drawing in closer. “Me too…”

The kiss was soft and gentle like he always starts with, waiting for you to give him the okay to kiss you again. And when you meekly lick his bottom lip, he gives in to your request and claims your lips again. 

Your moans were so sweet to his ears — his favorite thing to hear — especially when he becomes a little devilish and sucks on your tongue to make you whimper a little louder, turning him on even more. It serves as the perfect distraction for him to snake a hand into your shirt, his hand already making itself home and cupping your breast in your bra. 

You break the kiss with a gasp, and massages to your mound make your breath shaky. “Mmmah…you sneaky pervert,” you name-call him sweetly. 

“Can’t blame me; I just know that you like to have your tits played with.” Gojo sneers, tweaking your nipple to hear you gasp again. “Hey, remember you said you’d suck me off next time?”

“Huh?” The question threw you off before you could fall deeper into a euphoric haze. 

“Don’t ‘huh’ me, you promised!” He whines to you like a hurt puppy. “After I ate you out for twenty minutes straight last time, can I just have your mouth on my dick once?”

“I never told you to eat me out for twenty minutes!”

“You crying and telling me not to stop said otherwise!” He stands his argument, even if you warn him with a glare. “Just suck it, please. I haven’t felt your mouth in a while.”

Oh, for fuck’s sake. You didn’t expect to deal with his childish tendencies, but it is Gojo we’re talking about. You sigh, “…Fine, Satoru.” And then the white-headed boy beamed at the confirmation, immediately standing up and heading to your desk. It was an abrupt change of pace for a second until he brought your desk chair out. 

With glee, Gojo flings his jeans and boxers with ease, his half-hard cock out for you to see. He sits on your chair with spread legs, “I’m ready~.”

You roll your eyes, yet the smile on your face sneaks without you knowing while leaving your bed and crouching between his legs. “You’re such a big baby sometimes…”

Your hand finds its way to the body of his dick, gliding it up and down to feel the veins under your palm and fingertips. Gojo hums to your cold fingers, hitching his breath when you tease him with a blow of air. 

Your free hand comes to his balls, massaging his testicles in a way that has his leg jerk. He tries to fight it, but the squirm on his legs says otherwise. “Hahhh, fuck…quit it…”

“Hmm? What, you don’t like it when I tease you?” You peer up at him with a smug grin before using your tongue to lick on the glans slowly, and he covers his mouth before a gasp comes out after lapping on his frenulum. “But when you do it to me, it’s not a problem, huh?”

“Mmmph, shiit, Y/n—Ohhh…!” Another jolt of the hips after you lick and kiss one of his balls, teasing the skin with a kiss and tiny chews that would have him choke on his breath. “Jesus, fuck! Y/n, baby, you’re driving me crazy….Aishhh!!

“Oh, really?” God, you were such a fucking tease. But he fucking loved that so much. “What should I do?” You ask him before sucking on his balls again, and a hand comes to your shoulder to grip. 

“Mmmm…Blow me off, princess,” shivers crawl up his spine as you place kisses from the base of his cock towards the tip. “Please, I wanna feel you…” 

You giggle at his reply, finally taking in his cockhead to your pretty lips and sighing through your nose as you hollow your cheeks to take in more of him. 

Gojo sighs at your licks and sucks on his girth, his erection becoming accommodated to your oral cavity wonderfully. You unhurriedly prompt yourself to take in more of him until your lips reach his pubes, your throat now full of him, and the warmness of your gummy walls makes him squirm more. 

Bobbing your head at a moderate pace, you suck him off to that of a pleasurable cadence. You still use your hands to stroke him, Gojo melting to your touch even more. He throws his head back when you attack his tip again with the onslaught of licks and laps, the hand on his balls roughly kneading them jerks him to moan aloud. 

Fuck, it feels so fucking good having you suck him off like this. How your tongue moved up and down on him was so dangerous, prompting him to place a hand on your head for support. As if that would help, you don’t show him mercy when you suck him harder and faster. The noises coming from your mouth sounded so erotic and pornographic, the heat on his face brewing out more. 

“—Khhmm, fuck, man, I can’t…Ahhh! Y/n, I’m gonna cum if you keep licking it like that. Stop, st—Ahhaaa!!” 

But like he said before – you’re a tease (if not worse than him). You remove Gojo’s dick from your mouth and throat at once, the groan he exerts fueling the fire in your body. You stand to withdraw your shirt, bra, and panties to the ground, knowing Gojo’s watching every move. “Don’t get mad at me; I know how much you wanna cum inside.” 

You pull out the condom from the pocket of your skirt, placing the rubber on his cock after removing it from the wrapper. He couldn’t help but laugh, “Seems like you’re more of a pervert than me if you had that ready while those two were here earlier.” 

“Shut up,” you playfully kiss him with a sneaky bite to his bottom lip. Then, you mount and align your cunt on his dick, the glans kissing your wet labia. “Hmmm, fuck…”

“Relax, cutie,” he kisses you on the cheek while his hands fondle your breasts. 

You slowly descend your slit onto him, the tip of his cock pushing into the entrance of your vagina. A couple of exhales and inhales keep you steady when inserting him into you, not letting the pain distract you from the task at hand. And the both of you moan in unison when it makes it in, your hips leisurely coming down on him until your ass rests on his thighs. 

You grind on him with the roll of your hips, evoking choked intakes of air from him as a hand goes to your ass with vigor. His face to your chest while the other hand plays with one mound. His lips found a nipple to pop into his mouth to suck on. 

With a slow pace, you rock your hips onto him. Your legs bent for your feet to be on his knees, the chair solid enough to withstand you bouncing on Gojo’s dick with repetition.  

“Hoohhh, ohhhh, mmmm,” your hums are expressed in tunes. The curve of his cock is so fucking good, scraping your insides with precision. You couldn’t help but increase the speed just a little bit. 

Gojo keeps sucking on your nipple; the grazes of his teeth and pushing the bud up to the roof of his mouth only fuels more quivers to travel down your bouncing figure. Both of his hands now under your skirt to feel the flesh of your ass under his hungry grasp. He kneads your asscheeks with every thrust to your chasm, and your shrieks get louder by the second. 

“—Mmmph! Shit, shit, you feel so good, pretty,” he finally lets go of your hardened nipple, burying his face to your chest. “So fucking good for me…fuhuuuucck!

You could feel your cunt contract around him; every graze to your sensitive spots prompted your walls to grip around him. He hisses, looking up to see your expression as you ride him out. Fuck, you looked so good on top of him like this. He’ll add this position to the list of things to do again with you.

You peer down to see that Gojo is staring at you, and you quickly bring a hand to cover his eyes. “—Ahhahhn, d-don’t look at me like that! Yer soo embarrassing…!” 

He only chuckles at your shy demeanor, especially during this. But he humors you, not fighting your makeshift blind for him to see you wholly. He’s seen it all already — felt it all, too. And he could never get enough. 

“Ooooh, Satoruuu—Nnaaahh!” He loves how you say his name, your hand traveling to his hair to grab in tuffs. “Oh, fuck, ‘toruuu, I’m gonna cummm…!”

“—Hnngh! Yeah, baby?” Oh, he knows. The way you’re grinding to and fro on his pelvis tells him so. “Go ahead, princess. Clench on me and ride it out.”

And with that, your hips go to an erratic pace that has the both of you holding for dear life. The squeeze of your inner walls clenching on him almost makes him choke on his spit, the nails of his fingertips forming crescents on your skin. And you scream at it, slamming your ass onto him as you both climb up to orgasm. 

Within seconds, it hits the both of you like a train. This had to be Gojo’s favorite part of the entire thing, experiencing having your folds clamp and flutter around him as you cry for him. It took everything in his power not to come with you because he wants to have you on him a little longer. You just felt too good to let go — too addicted to your body to be done with one round.

When the contractions subside while your slurred howls get quieter, Gojo gives you a few minutes to let your body be free from the aftershocks. He knows your body is extra sensitive now, rubbing circles on your back and placing chaste kisses on your clavicle. You hum under his lips, letting the wave of your crescendo exude out from you quietly. 

However, since you wanted to be such a tease, why not be a tease back? At least, that’s what Gojo thought before he threw your cunt another snap of the hips, his cock jabbing into your delicate walls that haven’t recovered yet. A sharp cry comes from your puffy lips, the hand covering Gojo’s eyes finally freeing him to see you. 

He grins with hooded azure eyes, “Sorry, cutie, but I didn’t get to finish. Wouldn’t be fair if I didn’t get to have fun of my own, right?” 

You chew on your lip with trenched brows before bringing your face to his. “Don’t you get carried away like last time, Satoru.”

“No promises, princess~” he sings to your ear before humming into your lips. 

As mentioned before, Gojo doesn’t hate you — he just hates that he can’t fully express liking you. 

But having you on top of him like this, in his embrace, is a nice change of pace he’ll happily get used to.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

“Okay, everyone, class dismissed! Thank you for your time, and see you all on Friday.”

Professor Naga closes up the last class for today, and the students all get up from the seats of their elevated rows to pack up and leave. The clock is ten minutes before seven o’clock, the winter darkness already claiming the sky with a sheet of night. Students are either famished and heading to the dining hall for food, going straight to their dorms or homes, or staying behind for last-minute conversations.

Gojo was one of the latter, deciding to stay behind to chat with the group for a bit. After packing his backpack and putting on his coat, he slings from the table to jump to the row below him, where you were talking with Haibara and Ijichi. 

You watch his stunt, ready to lecture, “Jesus, Gojo, what’s all that for? You could’ve just walked around.”

“Ehhhh, why would I do that? That’s so lame.” He comes and bends close to you enough to slang his arm around your shoulders. 

But you click your teeth and try to maneuver away from his tall figure. “You’re lame,” you mutter under your breath.

However, Gojo’s ears perked with furrowed brows. “What did you say?”

“You heard me, you lame white furby!” You repeat yourself with a huff and the snow-haired student gawks at your brazenness. 

The two of you argue again; students passing by silently exit the class, others stand and watch, and Professor Yaga can only sigh at yet another altercation between you two. 

However, it quickly dissipates when Haibara laughs from his seat. “You two, there’s never a dull moment.”

You and Gojo blink at the dark brunette before removing Gojo’s hand from your shoulders. “Hmph, it’s not like it’s my fault; he’s the one who starts it.”

“Oh, what could I possibly do to make Y/n so upset with me this time?” He pushes up his sunglasses, snickering at the scowl you send him. 

Ichiji, being the passive second-year he is, meekly changes the topic from the row below you three. “On some brighter news, at least we did well on the presentation.” 

“That’s right!” Haibara happily agrees with the statement, leaning against the chair with his hands behind his head. “Professor Yaga seemed really pleased with our arguments; I don’t think he intervened even once. Plus, he said many good things about how we handled the topic. Nice one, team!” 

The raven-haired one hums at the other’s exclamation. “I think most of it goes to how Y/n and Gojo bounced off each other’s arguments. How you two pulled up examples from the articles yet remained dignified with your viewpoints was cool to witness. I even saw some students be engaged with the conversation, many amazed with how Y/n refuted Gojo’s arguments elegantly and respectfully.”

But most of all, what the two sophomores wanted to mention was that there was no yelling. To them, the professor, and all the students of this class, you and Gojo presented your presentation without a single tone of malice, no pointless teasing, no name-calling, nothing! It was a civil conversation between two opposing sides. To everyone’s surprise — and thankful stars — today was a success.

You chuckle nervously at the praise. “Oh, come on, you two, don’t let me and Gojo take all the credit. You guys did your part. Especially you, Ichiji; you were an exceptional help for my side and finding sources I could build off from.”

Gojo, on the other hand, rolls his eyes. “Psssh, don’t butter them up like that; without us, they would’ve failed this presentation big time. No offense.” He was forced to say that when you called him by his last name and hit him with your elbow.

None taken, the two younger friends say to themselves unbeknownst to each other. 

The tall one continues, “Besides, you were the one who did most of the work. I slacked off until the last minute when you whipped me into shape.” Gojo brings his hand on top of your head for a pat. The action surprised you enough to flinch a bit. “Nice work like always, Y/n.”

Were the stars aligned differently, or did Gojo just compliment you? It certainly took you aback, especially the two others who silently kept their observation to themselves. 

You could only look at his complacent look for a few seconds before you realized the warmth of your cheeks became stronger. Averting your eyes, you remove his hand from your head. “Thanks, Gojo…” you express gratitude. “You weren’t so bad yourself.”

A cheeky smile, his dimples prominent to blind you. “Awww, would you two look at that? They’re complimenting me, too~” Another bump to the chest has him cackling like a child, and you shake your head with rolled eyes.

The two younger students observe the scene before Haibara forcibly stretches and yawns to catch the two’s attention. “Man, I’m so hungry; I skipped lunch to prepare for this presentation. Me and Ijichi are gonna meet up with Nanami at the dining hall. You guys wanna come?”

You instantly beam at the proposal; who are you to refuse a dinner with your friends? “Sure! I’d love to…Oh! Wait, let me use the restroom and fill my water bottle.”

You rummage through your backpack for your water bottle before exiting the classroom. The boys watch you descend from row after row, and Gojo says, “Don’t take too long; I’ll convince them to leave without you.”

“Hmph, go ahead and try! They invited me; I don’t know who told you to invite yourself.” You stick your tongue out at him before opening and closing the door behind you. 

Gojo watches you with a smile still plastered on his face for a few seconds before Ijichi makes a tiny cough to catch his attention, the sunglasses-wearing junior turning to look back down to the other two. He notes the albeit cheesy-smiling faces they harbor, and he lifts a brow. “The hell are you two smiling for?”

The raven-haired sophomore squeaks at the sudden firm tone, “N–Nothing!”

“Pfft, oh come on, Kiyo; let’s not act like we didn’t see what we just saw.”

Gojo catches the nuance of Haibara’s comment. “Saw what?”

“You’re over here talking about our faces, but you’re the one who’s smiling at Y/n as they leave the door?” The brunette sophomore sends a wink to his junior, whose face doesn’t change at the comment.

“And your point is?”

“Well, it seems — to me, at least —  there might be something going on with you and Y/n?” 

Gojo was prepared for that, opening his mouth to interject quickly. However, the dark-haired other beat him to the punch. “Now that you mention it, Gojo and Y/n have been kind of…stable? There's still the usual arguments, but those haven't happened as much since last week…”

“Right!?” Haibara points at Ijichi with exclamation, making the other second-year flinch. “For some reason, things seem to be a little quieter with the two of them now, not to mention them hanging out way more often. Everyone’s been talking about it; even Geto and Shoko asked if Gojo had done anything that made Y/n passive?”

“I asked Nanami about it on Monday; he thinks maybe Y/n finally knocked some sense into Gojo’s childish brain to have him be so civil to engage without yelling their head off.”

“Pffthaha, I wouldn’t go that far. Y/n did just kick him in the shin yesterday for scaring them from behind.”

“Ahh, yes, well, that was deserved.”

“You two realize I’m still standing right the fuck here, right?” No, they hadn’t because the two discerned the twitch of Gojo’s brow after conversing about the tall, white-haired boy. 

“But it’s true!”

Another voice enters the set, making Gojo raise his head, and the other two turn to their left. It was some girl and her friend. Gojo knew of her; she sat next to him during class. Again, he knew of her, meaning she had no significance to his knowledge.

And yet, she speaks to the three boys. “You and Y/n have gotten a lot more close these past weeks compared to previous semesters—“

“Real close, too!” Their friend adds on from behind. “It’s as if you two are like a couple.”

“So…Are you two….a thing?”

Gojo could tell from a mile away what this was. Obviously, the first girl has a thing for him — he can see the anxiousness from the twiddle of her thumbs and avoidant eye contact. Although he wasn’t interested, he couldn’t even answer the question the way he wanted. What the hell could he say: that you two are in a secret relationship? He knows you’d have his grave ready before he could finish that confession.

And he can’t say the two of you are in any relationship either; it’s not what you would’ve told them. To everyone else, you and Gojo are friends who would preferably be caught dead rather than lying in bed together. So, might as well keep that facade up.

“Not that it’s any of your business,” he starts with the push of his sunglasses. “Y/n is a pretty good friend, and I’d like to keep it at that.”

Haibara and Ijichi turn from Gojo to look at each other and shrug. Before turning back, something caught their eye that caused the two sophomores’ skin to turn white.

Ijichi tries to prevent Gojo from speaking further. “G-Gojo—“

However, the tall one doesn’t listen. “I mean, sure, they got a nice personality and are independent…Kinda pretty, too, not gonna lie. But they’re not really my type. I mean, have you seen them? Just a little person who likes to find trivial stuff to yell at me over. Angry at the world around them, I’d say.“

“Go. Jo.” Haibara says the junior’s name through gritted teeth, bringing his hand up by his neck and drawing an imaginary horizontal line back and forth — a gesture for Gojo to not say anymore. But unfortunately, the sign wasn’t seen, and the words kept pouring out.  

“And to be honest, can you imagine? Me and Y/n, a couple? Jesus Christ, that would be fucking exhausting to deal with, especially with someone so boring and too uncute like them. I’ve seen prettier, been with better. I feel sorry for the poor bastard who does end up with them—“

“SATORU GOJO!”

Now — that sudden burst of yell from a loud, masculine voice — that was what got Gojo’s attention. It’s what got the attention of everyone else in the room. The snow-haired student jerks to look at the professor standing at the front, the older man with a deep frown. “What?

The professor doesn’t answer him. Instead, he points to the left of him with his chin with a huff. With common sense, Gojo turns behind him to see where the older man points. And at that moment, he felt his very being drop to the soles of his feet. Haibara and Ijichi took a slow breath in unison at the immediate tension.

Behind him stood you, a lone figure holding their water bottle within three arm’s length away from the group. But that was sufficient enough for you to have heard everything said. 

Breathing suddenly felt impossible for Gojo; his entire body was stiff under your gaze. His shades could hide his eyes, but he wasn’t sure it could shield the instant shame that slapped him across the face from you. 

And that was another thing: the look you harbored was indecipherable — the true definition of disengagement. There were no widened eyes, quivering lips, or shaky hands. You stood plainly and looked as though you were detached from the entire situation. And that was what scared him the most.

This was strike one.

He dared not move when you began walking up, and your eyes then shifted to ignore his presence. “Hey, Yu,” the brunette straightened his posture at the use of the first name. “I think I’ll have to decline on that dinner offer. I’m a little tired and have a paper I need to work on…Maybe next time?”

“Uhh, yeah, sure, no problem.” He answers with a sweat.

Wait a second. Gojo tries to call for you, “Y/n—“

“Ijichi,” but you immediately shut him down and directed your attention to the other sophomore friend as you put on your coat and stuffed your water bottle back into your bag. “Be sure to submit the presentation template and sources to the course site before the end of the day, please.”

“U–Uhh, already done, Y/n.” He squeaks while reassuring.

Wait, please. The tall one tries again, “Wait, Y/n—“

“Good.” You sling your backpack on, refusing to look at the person trying to talk to you. “Well, I’ll be seeing you, then.” And with that, you turn on your heel and head down the row to leave.

No, wait, stop— “Y/n, wait!” This was strike two. 

Gojo doesn’t hesitate to call out to you. At that moment, he follows you to the class steps where you were a row down left from the door. He grabs your hand without thinking, the size of your palm captured by his slender fingers. He knew it was a risky move, but he had to — he had to get you to talk with him right now, if not ever. Because the latter is something he isn’t ready for, something he didn’t think would be a possibility.

And yet, he will learn this lesson of being prepared for the impossible when you rapidly turn to him. Strike three.

SLAP!

Have you ever seen someone get smacked in the face so hard that their sunglasses come off? The remaining two girls who witnessed it know for sure now. Haibara and Ijichi won’t admit to it as they immediately turn to the other side of the room when they saw your hand move. But please believe they winced at the sound of the impact. The same goes for Professor Yaga, who was too stunned to speak, yet it was a valid outcome. 

Gojo didn’t move a single limb, allowing the stinging feeling on his cheek to course through his facial muscles. His eyes were glued to the carpeted ground; he knew that’s where they were supposed to be. And you snatched your hand away from his grasp, leaving his fingers to suffer in forced loneliness.

“You…you think it’s all fun and games to say stuff like that when I turn my back for a few minutes, huh?” He can see your hand palpitate from his peripheral; the anger depicted alone was enough to interpret. And the tremble in your voice? It felt like an arrow to his being. “…Look at me.”

He’d be a fool to have you repeat yourself; he has lost that right to toy with you now. With a slow inhale, Gojo rotates his head at you, azure eyes tracking up your figure to your face. And when it lands at that destination, his heart is shot down.

Tears stream down vexed, watery eyes. Your brows furrowed, and your bottom lip chewed in a terrible attempt to stop it from quivering. The rise and fall of your shoulders as you moderate your breathing, trying so hard not to let your temper dwell into a deeper phase of ugly. It was bad enough you’re crying in public, in front of your peers, your teacher — and it was because of him. 

“From this day forward,” you fight your sniffles to say your statement as clearly as possible. “Don’t you ever talk to me, Satoru Gojo. Enjoy your life without something as boring as me.”

And with that, you dismiss yourself from him and the class altogether, the room silent even after the slam of the door closed. No one says anything, too shocked from the event to utter a letter. 

The silence aids the ringing in Gojo’s ears, his breathing still having trouble maintaining a balanced front. The cheek you slapped burned with pain; he’s sure the skin is as red as a cherry. 

Oh, fuck.

He brings a hand to his face, his body fighting the trembling. The ringing in his ears worsens, along with the pounding in his head that beats like a drum. His eyes stuck to the ground below him, choosing to focus on something inanimate and not living. 

Fuck, fuck, fuck—

All he could think of in this time and place was you. Memories flashing right before him, of you and only you. He can hear the way you say his name, both in vexation and in sweet tunes. Your smiles, your frowns, your huffs, your whispers. When your eyebrows scrunch whenever you express worry for him, how you’re never afraid to stand up against him when making a point, the smile that’s been blinding him for many days and nights — the smile he wouldn’t mind seeing for eternity.

All those memories were one stab to his heart after another. And every time a recollection ended, a flash of your crying face would return to haunt him. Tears that weren’t meant to be there but were, and warm feelings you expressed with him were gone the moment he saw your eyes void of feelings for him. At least, that’s what he saw.

He hurt you. That was the only revelation that haunted him where he stood, making his voice falter from confidence. It was a revelation he never meant to bring about. And now that it exists and he sees the damage, nothing would be better for him now than the ground beneath him swallowing him whole.

“What…the fuck…”

© 𝐇𝐨𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐲2024 ❤︎ reblogs + comments are appreciated wholeheartedly ☆ dividers by @/cafekitsune & @/animatedglittergraphics-n-more.

[caelesjjk]

𝕖𝕟𝕥𝕒𝕟𝕘𝕝𝕖𝕕 - 𝕛𝕛𝕜&𝕜𝕥𝕙

⟶ title: entangled ⟶pairing: spidey!jungkook x fem reader, venom!taehyung x fem reader ⟶au: marvel au ⟶ rating: 18+ ⟶ genre: romance, smut, love triangle ⟶ wc: 7.6k ⟶ warnings: Mnetions of blood and a wound, drinking, Jungkook calls you Data and Taehyung calls you Pigeon, infidelity-ish?? (you'll see), two smut scenes: oral (female and male receiving) mutiple orgasms, overstim, unprotected sex (thats a no, wrap it up) few different positions, making out, sweet kisses, nipple stuff ⟶ summary: Jeon Jungkook is Spider-Man.

He saved your life twice. But he’s also been your sweet lab partner in college for the past two years and now someone who is more than just a friend.

You care about him…maybe even love him. But something tells you that you aren’t quite sure what love even is. How could you when you have feelings for someone else as well?

Kim Taehyung is the handsome stranger you’ve seen around campus and somehow ended up dancing with at Club Onyx. You were upset that Jungkook had stood you up once again and Taehyung made you feel like you were on top of the world.

What you didn’t know that night, is the dark secret Taehyung is trying desperately to hide, but the closer the two of you get the more difficult that becomes.

⟶ authors note: hello darklings, its been such a long time. I apologize this took so long but it's finally here! I can't wait to see what everyone thinks of spidey!kook and venom!tae, they're truly my babies and I have loved writing them. This is only part one, I make no guarantees how quickly part two comes out, but I'll do my best I promise. I'm thinking probably four parts for this. enjoy! tell me all ur thots! Shoutout to M (@here2bbtstrash), Sav (@jeonjcngkook) and Kay (@tea4sykes) for looking this over and correcting my insanity and also assuring me that it's not terrible lol. Thank you all so much for your patience and help.

“So where is he?” your friend Penny says from across the table.

“He said he was coming.” You sigh, stirring your drink with the straw.

“He said that the last two times we were all supposed to study together.” Hoseok gives you a look that’s part sympathy and part annoyance.

“He’s working three part-time jobs. Not all of us have our parents paying for our apartments, Hobi.” You give him a playful glare and he returns it, followed by a poke of his tongue from between his lips.

Part of you wished you didn’t know Jungkook’s secret. That you could go back to the days where you were blissfully unaware of who he was. But back then, being stood up hurt even more because you didn’t know why.

Now you know. You know that Jungkook is Spider-Man. The infamous superhero  with powers he acquired from being bitten by a lab altered arachnid a few years ago.

He saved your life. Twice in fact. Both times it was because you were curious, too curious for your own good, and you had been suspecting something was going on with Jungkook. 

You followed him one night and watched in awe as he changed into his Spider-Man suit in an alleyway. And not just because he was Spider-Man, but because he was insanely gorgeous. You were hypnotized by the man who had been sitting next to you as your lab partner for most of the year. Who constantly hid his body beneath baggy clothes and bucket hats. 

You had always liked him a little more than you cared to admit. And after you found out the truth about him, your friendship grew into something more.

There weren’t any labels; you didn’t call each other boyfriend and girlfriend, much to your dismay. But Jungkook always told you that if the wrong person found out about the two of you, they could use you to get to him. And he needed to be able to focus on his whole saving the world gig, and not constantly worry about your safety. 

You understood. But that didn’t mean it didn’t sting a little.

You manage to study a bit longer with your friends before deciding you were far too distracted. You call Jungkook on your walk back to your apartment, but of course he doesn't  answer. 

So now you wait. And you worry.

No matter how hot the shower water is as it hits your back, it doesn’t stop the worry. You just want him to be safe, even if he pissed you off by not showing up again. 

You wrap yourself in your favorite silky robe and get comfortable on your bed with some of your homework you didn’t finish with your friends, slowly getting immersed in all of the calculations and formulas that you love so much. They were a great distraction.

Not sure how long you’ve been studying, you get up to stretch and make your way to your apartment balcony, opening the doors and stepping outside for a breath of fresh air. 

The city is always loud, but up here it isn’t so bad. The traffic sounds far away and the lights are just flickers across the skyline. You might even think it was beautiful if it wasn’t for the constant bad lurking around every corner. Or maybe you had just heard too many scary things from Jungkook.

Sighing when he pops into your head again, you turn around to head back inside only to come face to face with the superhero in question. Seeing him hanging there upside down from your doorway startles you just enough to send you stumbling backwards towards your balcony.

Before you can get too far, or even fully scream, Jungkook is shooting a web at your torso, pulling you back and into his arms as he flips down onto his feet. Your head swims from how quickly it happens.

“Data, look at me.” Jungkook’s voice is slightly muffled through his mask. “It’s just me.”

“You scared me.” You look up at him as he removes his mask and shakes out his hair, eyes finally meeting yours. 

“I’m sorry, I should’ve been…noisier.” Jungkook smiles and you almost forget that you’re angry with him. Almost.

“What are you doing here anyways?” You shove against his broad chest and feel his arm release your waist. He sighs, following you inside your apartment.

“I know you’re upset I missed the study session…” Jungkook starts to explain, but you twist back around to face him.

“If my friends hadn’t seen you around campus now and then, they would think I made you up, Jungkook. You never show. It makes me look pathetic.” You cross your arms over your chest and wait for the next excuse.

“You aren’t pathetic, Data. I’m just…” Jungkook winces when he reaches for you, a hand moving down to his ribs in pain. “Sorry, it’s healing, it's  just slow.”

“What’s healing? What happened to you?” You let the fight go for a moment, closing the space between the two of you and moving his hand out of the way.

Beneath his fingers is a large cut, bloody but half-hidden by his suit. It looks angry and inflamed. What could’ve made a cut like this?

“It’s nothing. I’ll heal up in a couple hours.” He pulls your hand away, blood stained on the tips of your fingers. 

“It won’t matter how quick you heal if it gets infected. Come in here.” Your hand wraps around his and you pull him into your small bathroom. You steady him against your vanity and move to grab your first aid kit from the cabinet above your toilet. “Take that off.” You gesture to his Spider-Man suit.

“Yes, ma’am.” Jungkook teases, gingerly working his top half out of the suit. He hisses through his teeth as he peels the suit away from his ribs and lets it hang at his hips.

You are not the universe's strongest soldier.

Your eyes drift over all the dips and curves of muscle. A perfectly sculpted chest and abs you could literally eat off of are right in front of you, scrambling every sense you have in your head. You need to focus. Stay focused on the task at hand and not his ridiculously toned body.

“You okay, Data?” he asks, humor in his voice. That horrid nickname he had given you in your first year as lab partners is feeling more endearing these days. You clear your throat.

“I’m fine. Why wouldn’t I be fine? Just tending to Spider-Man’s wounds in my extremely tiny bathroom.” You try to laugh but it doesn’t sound genuine.

You take out some bandages and gauze and get to work cleaning him up. But even as you tape down the gauze, you can visibly see the wound getting smaller. Super powers really are something else.

“Data.” Jungkook’s voice brings you back to reality. 

“What?” You sigh.

“Please come here.” His hands reach for your hips and you give in, letting him pull you until you’re flush against him, suddenly nose to nose. “That’s better.”

“I’m angry with you,” you whisper, heart pumping a bit faster in the close proximity.

“I know that you are. I’m really sorry…I swear I wanted to be there.” You look down to see him slip his gloves off and sit them on the countertop before his hands come up to cup your face.

“Then what happened? You need to tell me.” Your hands wrap around his wrists.

“There’s something out there, Data. A…monster that we can’t figure out. It’s strong…and fast. Nothing I’ve ever seen before.” His thumbs brush the corners of your mouth. 

“What does it want?” 

“It keeps breaking into the Lab across the River. It’s looking for something. No one at the lab is being very forthcoming with information.” His forehead presses to yours. “But Mr. Kim is working on that part.”

Kim Seokjin, more famously known as Ironman. He was a mentor and a good friend to Jungkook. He was helping Jungkook navigate the new world of being a superhero and also gave him a job to help him pay for school. 

“Hasn’t Mr. Kim told you to call him Jin over and over?” you tease, hands coming up to rest against his chest. Jungkook laughs quietly, pulling you closer.

“He has. Guess it just slipped out.” His hands move down to palm your ass.

“What exactly do you think you’re doing?” You raise an eyebrow in question of his actions.

“Just feels like I haven’t touched you in so long.” His warm mouth finds your throat and he presses kisses to the skin.

“Two days is a long time?” 

“It is when it comes to you. Thinking about how much I want you gets so distracting.” He nuzzles into the crook of your neck, making you giggle.

“So what I did for you two days ago wasn’t enough?” You let your hands slither down from his chest and over the planes of his stomach.

“Never enough.” His nose skims over your jaw until you’re back face to face and his lips are devouring yours. “I’d like to pay you back.” 

“How?” You moan when you’re cut off by his tongue sliding into your mouth.

“Let me show you?” Jungkook pulls away from the kiss, taking your hand and leading you out of the bathroom.

Thinking he means to lead you to your bed, you start to pull him towards it, but he seems to have other ideas, walking you back out onto the balcony. He releases your hand momentarily to slide his suit back up over his shoulders.

“What are you going to show me out here, Jungkook?” You start to feel suspicious.

“Do you trust me?” He jumps up onto your railing with ease, still holding your hand in his.

“Not if it involves you swinging me around off the side of buildings.” You start to pull back, but his other wrist shoots a web at your torso; using his inhuman strength, he pulls you up onto the railing into his arms.

“I would never let you fall. Never. Just close your eyes for a few minutes. I promise it’ll be worth it, Data.” He touches your cheek gently, and even though you want to throw up every time he does this, you close your eyes and wrap your arms as tightly as possible around his neck and your legs around his waist. “Ready?” He whispers in your ear, one strong arm wrapping around your back.

You don’t verbally answer, just nod once before burying your face into his neck.

And then the solid feeling of being on the ground disappears and the sickening feeling of free falling is very apparent. You try to breathe, squeezing yourself around Jungkook as you listen to the whooshing sound of his web shooters discharge as he swings you between the tallest buildings in the city.

“You’re doing amazing.” Jungkook kisses your cheek. “Just another minute.”

You keep your eyes clamped shut until the curiosity becomes too overwhelming, making you dare to peek just the slightest bit. You see the sun setting on the horizon, orange and purple hues slowly disappearing beneath the river. As long as you don’t think about how high up you are, it really is beautiful up here.

You soak in the feeling of Jungkook holding you so tightly because you never know when the next time may be. You hate to sound so dramatic in thinking that way, but it really is a guessing game sometimes . Your hands loosen and slide up into his hair, making him look down into your eyes and smile when he sees how fondly you’re looking back at him.

“Kiss me,” you whisper, even though there isn’t a single soul that could hear you up here.

Jungkook kisses the corner of your mouth and then the other before the softness of his lips has your eyes fluttering closed. This kiss is only gentle brushes of lips, noses grazing in the sweetest way you can imagine, all the while Jungkook is still effortlessly swinging you between buildings.

He shoots a web straight up into the air, letting it connect to the side of one of the tallest buildings, slowly pulling the two of you up until he’s reached the highest ledge, tapping your thighs so you know it’s safe to put your feet down. You kiss him once more before you open your eyes and look out at the nearly complete sunset…a thousand feet in the air.

“Why are we up here, Jungkook? You know the heights..” He kisses you again before you can finish the sentence.

“Can we try something?” He smiles, and it’s infuriating. You’re too weak for this spidey boy. You sigh with exasperation.

“I’m already very wary of saying yes.” You look away from the ledge towards the top of the building, taking note of all the intricate filigree and gargoyle statues.

“Let me make you feel good…up here.” His cheeks heat a little when he asks.

“Is this some kind of weird adrenaline thing? Why would you want that?” Your voice cracks and you sputter, disbelief heavy in your tone.

“I think it’ll be intense…feel so good.” His lips move down and his teeth nip at your jaw.

“It’s insane…” You melt into his touch and the way his mouth sucks at your neck.

“If you don’t like it, I’ll take you home. And I’ll get you naked in your bed instead.” He pulls your shirt over your head, fully knowing you’re about to give in.

“Bed sounds so good right now…”

“Please, Data…just try it.” He tosses your shirt to the side, cupping your breasts and kissing the tops of them.

“What do I have to do?” You feel too good to let the fear ruin the way he’s making you feel.

“Lie back on the ledge, with your arms above your head and your wrists crossed.” 

You let him lead you down onto the ledge, every nerve in your body hot and on edge. Jungkook makes sure that you’re settled before he stands back up straight, looking down at you while you slowly move your arms above your head the way he asked.

“You’re perfect, Data.” Jungkook stares at you a moment longer before he aims his web shooter and traps your wrists together against the concrete ledge beneath you.

Your chest heaves at the idea of being completely helpless. He’s taken away your control and your ability to touch him as you please. 

He makes quick work of the sleep pants you had been wearing, tossing them away to join the gargoyles on the rooftop. 

“Jungkook…” you whimper when he lowers himself between your legs and lies down on his stomach so he can be face to face with your heat.

“Relax, okay? I’m gonna make it up to you.” He kisses a path down your thigh, sucking gently and caressing with his tongue.

You arch your back from the ledge when he pushes your panties to the side and his mouth finally makes contact with your pussy. Just a sweet kiss at first, then a deep, swirling lick to your clit. You pull against the webbing trapping you in place, fingers begging to be in his hair.

If only the citizens of his precious city could see him right now. Face buried and tongue lapping just for you. All of it for you and not for them.

You can feel tears start to form in your eyes from the way your orgasm is already so close to crashing over you. Jungkook has spent quite a bit of time getting to know your body and memorizing the things he knows that you like.

“Come on my tongue, baby. I’ve got you.” Jungkook soothes before his mouth is back to devouring you.

One particularly harsh suck to your clit while his fingers finally join in on the fun is what sends you over the edge, clenching around his digits in spasms.

You’re lucky that no one could possibly hear you all the way up here. The moans and groans that you both make while Jungkook licks up every bit of your arousal are beyond obscene.

“Please get this web off of me,” you huff between breaths. Jungkook slowly raises his head and with a smile on his shiny face, reaches up and effortlessly rips the webbing from your wrists. 

You jolt upwards, wrapping your arms around his neck and digging your hands into his soft hair. Your mouths mold together automatically, your tongue tasting yourself from his lips.

“Did you like it?” Jungkook finally asks, pulling you into his lap.

“As long as I continue to pretend we aren’t thousands of feet in the air, I enjoyed it very much.” You both smile and you lean in to kiss the corner of his pierced lip. “You can’t always distract me with your extremely talented mouth though. I just…want you to try and be in my life.” You push some hair off of his forehead before he kisses your lips once more.

“It won’t always be this crazy, Data. I promise. I just want to make sure I help Jin as much as I can with this monster.” 

“I know.” You want to tell him that you wish you came first. That there’s always going to be another monster keeping you apart. But that’s the price you pay for loving a superhero. 

“Let me take you home?” He stands up, still holding you in his arms.

“Maybe let me put my pants back on first?” You laugh as he sets you down to retrieve your pants from a gargoyle statue. 

And then you’re back in his arms and swinging back to reality.

The sun is still warm even though fall is almost in full swing. Leaves are starting to change colors and slowly drop off the trees. You love the smell of them as they dance by you on the breeze.

Something you don’t love is the damn pigeons that have made their home in the nooks and crannies of all the old buildings on campus. They fly down from their nests and make nuisances of themselves with the students, trying to get pieces of food.

You’ve been continuously shooing them away as you attempt to do your homework. 

Sitting in the courtyard on top of a patchwork blanket, you’re lost in the numbers and formulas that keep you best distracted these days. So much so that you almost don’t see Jungkook before his head is in your lap and his smiling face is looking up at you, pigeons scattering about from his sudden movements.

“Good afternoon, Data,” he says cutely. You set down your notebook and pen, leaning down to kiss him.

“How nice to see you at school for once,” you tease, pulling his bottom lip gently between your teeth.

“Mm, things have been quiet for a couple of days. I got some sleep…and I missed you.” Jungkook wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you to lay down with him across the blanket.

“What are you doing?” You laugh and push against his chest.

“Making sure everyone sees me kissing you.” 

“Isn’t that dangerous?” You comb your nails through the hair at the nape of his neck. “If the wrong person sees?” 

Jungkook freezes for a moment, his eyes not meeting yours as his face scrunches in concentration. He abruptly sits up on his knees and you follow, looking around the courtyard.

“Something isn’t right.” Jungkook’s voice is low and quiet.

“What is it?” You continue to look around, seeing students walking to class or enjoying the sun in the courtyard like the two of you were.

Your eyes stop when you notice someone by the fountain taking photos with a professional type camera. His head of black messy hair is covered by a backwards black baseball hat. Long legs covered by snugly fit black jeans and his top half in a white button up, sleeves rolled halfway up in the most maddening way.

He must feel your eyes on him, because he’s suddenly looking right at you and you’re able to recognize who it is you’ve been drooling over. You feel embarrassment flood your face and body as you quickly look away, your heart racing in your chest.

Kim Taehyung. A photography student at your university. The best photography student if you remember correctly. You remember having a basic class with him your first year and he had seemed very nice. His smile was sweet, but the two of you didn’t talk to each other much at all. 

You did think he was absolutely stunning though, sometimes wishing you weren’t too shy to have spoken to him back then.

Your classes must have all been different after that, but you still see him around campus from time to time. Always taking pictures, but always alone. And last year he seemed to disappear altogether before reappearing when the new semester started.

When you get brave enough to look back up at him, you see he has his camera pointed at you, snapping pictures. You look away again so as not to alert Jungkook of what’s going on. Taehyung smiles when you look up out of the corner of your eye, before moving on to take pictures of something else. Why is your heart beating so fast?

“Everything okay?” Jungkook asks, making you jump.

“I should be asking you that,” you manage to croak out.

“That weird sense of something being off is happening… I should go.” He starts to stand up and you grab his hand.

“What about this weekend? You’re still coming out with us right?”

He bends down and captures your lips in a quick but sweet kiss. “I promise I won’t miss it.” He gently nudges your forehead with his, making you roll your eyes with a smile as you watch him jog across the courtyard.

“Was that Jungkook?” Hoseok asks, sitting down across from you on the blanket.

“Um…yeah. He had to get to class,” you lie. Again. “Hey Hobi?”

“Yeah?” He stops grabbing books from his bag and looks up at you.

“What do you know about Kim Taehyung?” You nod towards the man with the camera, still taking pictures of some angel statues on the far side of the courtyard.

“He’s supposedly the best photography major at this school. He’s also…strange.” Hobi pretends to get a chill.

“Strange? Strange how?” You’re interest even more peaked than before.

“I don’t know, ____. I just heard some shit about him talking to himself all the time, and sometimes he comes to class all beat up.” Hobi brushes it off like it’s no big deal.

You don’t pester him any further, instead watching Taehyung as he takes a seat on a bench and starts scrolling through the pictures he’s taken on his camera. 

Maybe people are making things up about him because he’s different. People don’t like different for some reason. But you…you tend to be pulled towards the different. Or it tends to find you when you least expect it.

Saturday night has come and almost gone, and you’re still waiting for Jungkook to show up at Club Onyx to meet up with you and your friends. You’ve been waiting for hours and downing drinks the longer you go unanswered.

You’ve called and texted him over and over with no answer and are finally ready to just give up. Hobi gives you that pitiful look as you slam your phone face down onto the table.

“Fuck this, I’m getting another drink.” You don’t say it to anyone in particular and you don’t wait for anyone to answer before slipping into the crowd towards the bar.

“Can I get a Long Island please?” you ask the bartender when she approaches. You slouch down onto a barstool and see a familiar face on the other side of the bar.

Taehyung. Sitting with a glass of whiskey in one hand and his phone in the other. The hat you usually see him wear is nowhere to be seen. Instead, his curly black hair has been somewhat styled over his forehead. He’s still wearing a white button up, but he’s left the top buttons undone this time, revealing the smooth skin of his chest.

“Here you go.” The bartender hands you your drink just in time for Taehyung to look up from his phone and see you already looking at him.

“Shit,” you whisper to yourself, taking your drink and making a break for the dance floor as quickly as you can. 

The song playing isn’t one that you know, but as you chug down your drink you start to care less and less about knowing the song and just let yourself go. You want to have a good time and not mope about Jungkook standing you up once again.

You let strangers grind against you as you move across the dance floor, arms raised above your head and your hips swaying to the beat of the song. You’re a little tipsy as you place your glass down on the nearest table, but not enough to not know what’s going on. 

A slower song starts to play with more of an r&b feeling. You watch as people start to pair off, the movements of their bodies making heat rush through you and settle on your cheeks and  neck. You start to turn back to find your friends when you feel an arm slide around your waist, making you jump from the suddenness of being touched.

“Easy there, Pigeon,” a voice as deep as the ocean and smoother than satin says against the shell of your ear.

You twist your neck almost too quickly, eyes landing on the face of Taehyung. Your breath nearly disappears completely seeing him this closely.

“What are you doing?” you ask, but you don’t try to move away from him. God, you should move away but you can’t.

“You need someone to dance with.” He smiles and says the words with a matter of fact tone.

“I should find my friends…” Your brain finally starts to catch up and you move from his hold.

“One dance, Pigeon. Would be a pity to waste such a good song.” 

“Why are you calling me Pigeon? I have a name.” You fold your arms over your chest.

“I know your name. But the pigeons at school seem to have really taken a liking to you, I couldn’t resist.” His boxy smile widens.

“You’re not being very convincing about this dance.” You try not to smile.

Taehyung puts his hand out asking silently one more time for you to dance with him. There’s that nagging feeling that you shouldn’t, but there’s a bigger part that says Jungkook isn’t your boyfriend, and he stood you up after he promised not to miss this night.

You take his hand.

Taehyung pulls his bottom lip between his teeth and gently pulls you towards him, spinning you around at the last second to press your back against his front. You gasp when you immediately feel him lean over you and press his face into your neck, his nose skimming your skin.

His big but delicate hands find your stomach, slithering down until they reach your hips, slightly bunching your dress in his fingers.

He gently moves his hips and grinds against your ass in the most tantalizing way, reminding you that you did in fact agree to dance. Taehyung groans quietly in your ear when the pace of your hips becomes quicker with more added pressure from your ass into his crotch.

You let yourself relax against him, head falling back against his shoulder and exposing more of your neck to him. His impatient mouth finds the juncture of your neck and shoulder and he kisses a soft line across your skin.

“Can’t believe your boyfriend would leave you all alone out here where the monsters can find you.” Taehyung's deep voice vibrates through your body and settles into your core.

“I don’t have a boyfriend…or monsters.” The words come out sounding breathless as he continues to press your body closer to his.

“We think you do.” His long tongue traces the shell of your ear. 

We? You let it go because your brain is too foggy with lust to wonder what that could even mean right now.

“I don’t,” you repeat, pushing thoughts of Jungkook away for just a night. Taehyung laughs quietly, pulling your lobe between his teeth as his hands move up your chest to cup your breasts.

You don’t even care who sees the way he’s touching you right now. You’re becoming so turned on that you know your panties have to be absolutely ruined at this point.

“Come home with me.” He spins you around to face him just as the song ends, your eyes fluttering open as he cups your face in his hands.

“That…I can’t.” Your eyes search his, hoping it will make you realize that you need to walk away. Instead, there’s something that tells you you’re safe, but that you’re also in for a world of trouble. You don’t know how you know, you just do.

“I’ll make you feel so good, Pigeon.” His mouth is almost on yours, lips just brushing as he whispers. This man is fucking undeniable.

“Okay,.” you cave. You just want to feel wanted. You want to matter more than a stranger on the street. You want Taehyung to make you forget how much it hurts when Jungkook lets you down over and over again.

“Good girl.” His warm mouth slots with yours as he kisses you feverishly. Like he’s been starving for years and your mouth is his only source of sustenance. It’s hot, fiery, and all-consuming.

Not even sure when his lips leave yours, you’re suddenly being pulled by your hand towards the club exit. Your brain clears and you look around for Hobi or any of your other friends but you don’t see them. And honestly, you hope that they don’t. You hope they didn’t see what happened on the dance floor and you hope they don’t see you leaving with someone who isn’t Jungkook. That would be far too messy to have to explain.

“Did you drive here?” You squeeze Taehyung’s hand and he pulls you closer to him.

“I did. I didn’t even finish my drink, I promise I’m safe to drive.” He eases your mind as the two of you push out of the door and turn towards the parking lot.

But your mind is only at ease for a mere minute before you realize that Taehyung is leading you towards what appears to be a very, very fast motorcycle. Everything on it is jet black and ridiculously sexy. You wish you weren’t absolutely terrified.

“I’m not getting on that.” You stop in your tracks.

“Why not?” Taehyung grabs the helmet off the back and offers it to you. “I’ll even give you the helmet.”

“I just…that looks dangerous.” 

“It is.”

“Glad you’re honest,” you half-laugh.

“The bike is dangerous, but I would never let anything happen to you, Pigeon.” Taehyung swings one of his long legs over the motorcycle, straddling it as he waits for you to make a decision.

“We hardly know each other, Taehyung.”

“That doesn’t mean I can’t keep you safe on my motorcycle, or that we have to know everything about each other to feel something.” He holds the helmet out again and you feel your mouth go dry at his words.

The danger aside, there is no going back if you get on that motorcycle with him. There is no way you would have an untainted conscience ever again. Every time you were with Jungkook from this day on, you would have to think about the fact that at this moment, you also wanted Kim Taehyung to fuck you.

That should terrify you more than it does.

You grab your phone and quickly open it to see no messages or missed calls from Jungkook. Your answer gets a little clearer as you reach out and take the helmet from his hand.

“Carefully,” Taehyung says, taking one of your hands and guiding you to straddle the motorcycle behind him. You settle the helmet onto your head, and Taehyung smiles widely when he looks over his shoulder to make sure you’re ready. 

When he starts the motorcycle, the vibrations from the engine immediately flood your body. Your arms instinctively wrap around his torso as tightly as possible, and you wait once again for the world to go past you far too quickly. The same way it always does when Jungkook is swinging you between buildings.

When he pulls out of the parking lot, he doesn’t go too fast like you thought he would. He takes his time weaving between the cars and taxis, making his way through the busy streets and closer to the docks. 

You don’t entirely hate the motorcycle ride. Nor do you hate the way Taehyung laces his fingers through yours and holds them against his chest, or the way he brings your knuckles to his lips to brush a kiss against each one while he steers with the other hand. You don’t hate the way he sometimes moves that hand down to tap your thigh to let you know he’s about to make a sharp turn. You wish you hated the motorcycle ride.

Taehyung presses a button on his phone and a door on one of the warehouses starts to lift up. He pulls through it, parking the bike once inside. Your legs feel like jello when you take his hand to try and stand up, stumbling a bit in his hold.

“Okay there, Pigeon?” Taehyung grasps the sides of the helmet and helps you take it off. He sits it on the back of the bike before coming back to help you straighten out your helmet hair.

“It wasn’t terrible.” You smile and so does he, fire moving through your veins the longer your eyes stay locked with his. You quickly clear your throat. “So, you live in a warehouse?”

“I used to live in the city. It was just too…busy. I needed space.” He takes your hand and leads you towards some metal stairs. But before he does, you notice several more motorcycles parked inside the open part of the warehouse. Who is Kim Taehyung?

At the top of the stairs, it opens into a large open loft area that has a surprising feeling of comfort to it. There’s a kitchenette off to the right with just the necessities: a fridge, small table, stove and microwave.

The left side of the room appears to be the bedroom. A big messy bed sits against a headboard with intricate black vines carved into the wood. Soft pillows are haphazardly lying in all directions, some on the floor with their feathers scattered across the room. Taehyung visibly stiffens when he sees you notice them.

“Sorry about those…I think I might have a raccoon stuck in here somewhere.” He laughs and moves to kick the busted pillows under his bed.

Strange. He’s a little strange.

“Do you need something to drink?” he asks.

“Should I be worried about being here, Taehyung?” 

“What? No. No, I promise you’re safe.” He crosses the room and comes to stand in front of you, concern evident on his perfect face.

“I just…I don’t do things like this. I’ve never even had a one night stand.” You card a hand through your hair and Taehyung tips your chin up to look at him.

“Why does it need to be just one night?” His face softens and his thumb brushes over your bottom lip.

“Taehyung…I don’t know what I’m doing.” It’s barely a whisper.

His head tilts slightly to the side before it spasms slightly, an uncomfortable look painting his face as he shakes his head and gets the spasm under control. 

“Stop it.” Taehyung grits between his clenched teeth, mostly to himself.

“Are…are you okay?” Your worry grows by the second.

“Sorry…I’m sorry.” He cups your face in his hands and kisses you sweetly, catching you off guard. “I’m sorry if I scared you,” he whispers against your lips.

“I’m not scared of you.” It isn’t a lie. You aren’t scared, but something is off. And you’re too stupid to leave. “Should I be scared?”

“Not of me.” He speaks as if someone else is in the room. 

His mouth finds yours again and lust takes the place of worry and concern. Taehyung easily grabs your thighs and lifts you off the ground as if you weigh nothing at all.

The next moments are a blur of clothing being stripped and bare skin coming in contact with hands and lips. Teeth scrape over nipples and long fingers drown themselves inside your dripping pussy. The warehouse echos with the sounds of your moans and his deep groans.

After your first thigh shaking orgasm, Taehyung sits on the edge of his bed and you kneel in front of him between his knees, taking his far too perfect cock into your mouth. You worship him with your tongue and make him come down your throat, his hands tightly gripping your hair.

Chills run through your sweaty body as he bends you over his bed and eases his cock inside you. Stars explode behind your eyelids while your fingers grip the bed sheets.

“He doesn’t fuck you enough, does he Pigeon? You’re so fucking tight.” Taehyung’s fingers dig harshly into your hips as he mercilessly pounds you from behind.

You can only moan in response, the coil in your stomach tightening and threatening to burst again. Tears slip from the corners of your eyes and stain the sheets you’re so desperately clinging to.

His fingers suddenly start to feel sharper, like they could pierce your skin at any moment, past the point of hurting in a good way.

“Stop,” Taehyung growls and the piercing feeling of his fingers starts to let up. If your brain wasn’t so fogged by your oncoming orgasm you may have questioned who the hell he was talking to.

“I’m so close,” you whine, feeling Taehyung press himself closer to you, one of his hands coming to the back of your head and pushing you deeper into the mattress. The new angle  makes you feel him so deeply that even your stomach clenches and the dam finally breaks; you’re falling off the edge of the most shattering orgasm you’ve ever experienced.

Taehyung’s hips stutter as you clench around him, making him moan deep in his chest. When you can no longer hold up your body, he grabs your shoulder and flips you onto your back, then immediately slides his cock back inside your overly sensitive pussy.

You’re so blissfully fucked that it takes you a moment to focus your eyesight on his face. Sweaty black curls sticking to his forehead as you lift your heavy arms and dig your fingers into his hair so you can pull his mouth down onto yours.

“I almost…I almost lost control. You feel so good.” His tongue swipes into your mouth as he angles himself to hit your g-spot with every hard thrust of his hips.

“Please come, Taehyung.” Your nails dig into his back and leave scratch marks across his skin.

“Never wanted anyone as much as I want you…fuck we want you so badly.” He buries his face into your neck as he thrusts once, twice more before you feel him spill inside of you. Hips bruisingly tight against yours as his cock twitches each time more cum fills you up.

“Holy shit.” You move your hands back to his hair and gently lift up to see his face. You swear when he looks at you that all the color has drained from his eyes. They’re solid white.

You gasp and blink once, seeing Taehyung’s pretty brown eyes looking back at you in less than a second.

“Wh-what was that?” You’re still panting.

“What was what, Pigeon?” He smiles and presses a kiss to your cheek before he slowly pulls out and walks to his bathroom, giving you a chance to ogle his perfect little ass and the muscles of his back.

“I just…thought I saw something,” you say when he returns to the bed with a cloth for you to clean up with. You really need to get more sleep if you’re starting to see things.

“Did I hurt you?” Taehyung’s face is suddenly a lot more serious when he reaches out to run his fingers over the apple of your cheek.

You remember the way his hands felt on your hips. How they could’ve been on the verge of piercing through your skin. At least, that’s what you thought when it was happening.

Looking down at your hips, there’s obvious red marks from fingertips, but also scratch marks that just don’t seem like they could’ve come from Taehyung’s short cut nails. What the hell?

“I um…I think I’m okay.” You pull the covers up over your hips a little, hoping he won’t see.

“You should sleep here. I can take you home in the morning, I’m just too sleepy right now.” He pouts his mouth a little and wraps his arms around you, pulling you into his side.

“Okay.” You’re admittedly too spent to call an Uber or argue with him about taking you home tonight. You just need to sleep. Sleep will fix everything. Tomorrow you will wake up and not feel like you’re losing your entire mind.

“…don’t ever fucking do that again…” You hear part of a conversation in your half asleep state. “I swear if you would have hurt her…”

Who the hell is Taehyung talking to in the middle of the night?

“She’s with the spider….liability.” A deep inhuman voice fills the empty air. Your eyes shoot open wide and every nerve is suddenly completely wired.

Are they…are they talking about Jungkook?

“She’s not. She said she’s not,” Taehyung’s voice answers, stress evident in his words.

“We should eat her now…” 

“No! You’ll have to kill me if you think you’re ever touching her. And we both know you can’t do that,” Taehyung yells.

You wrap the thin sheet around your naked body and slowly move towards the railing that overlooks the open part of the warehouse downstairs. You stay back far enough so not to alert anyone of your presence.

Looking down, you see Taehyung sitting at a table with his back towards you, wearing his black jeans slung low on his hips and nothing else. He runs a hand through his hair in frustration.

And that’s when it seems like the shadows around him start to move and your heart threatens to burst from your chest. Because not only do they move, but they have a face. A terrifying face that is seeping from the back of Taehyung’s neck and moving around him …as it talks.

“You’re weak for her,” the monster growls deeply, its huge teeth and unnaturally long tongue becoming more apparent as it moves into the light.

“We had a deal.” Taehyung seethes. “I’m literally the only person you haven’t killed when you bonded with them. You need me to get your symbiote friends home and I need you to take down that fucking lab.”

You can barely believe what you’re seeing or hearing. Is this the monster Jungkook was talking about? The one breaking into the lab across the river?

“Aren’t we friends?” The monster asks in a condescending way.

“Not if you hurt ____. She has no idea what she’s in the middle of and it should stay that way.” Taehyung holds his arms out straight and the monster starts to wrap its moving pitch black skin around him…its skin becoming his.

You’re so startled by the sight in front of you that you stumble back, knocking over an end table full of magazines and books. Fuck.

“Shit,” you hear Taehyung say before the monster has completely consumed him. What stands in his place is something you will never forget for the rest of your life.

The monster must be at least 8 feet tall, huge bulking muscles made of that inhuman black skin that constantly appears to be moving. Its  huge white eyes land right on you immediately, its  mouth and teeth pulling into a wicked smile as it jumps into the air and clears the railing in a single leap. You scream as the ground crunches beneath its feet when it lands in front of you.

The monster looms over you and all the breath in your lungs disappears.

“What…what are you?” you croak, fear freezing you in place.

“We…are Venom.”

taglist: @hanversace @chaelvrx @moonchild1 @rkivewritersblog @ungodlyjoon @ricecakeslove @jeonsweetpea @screamertannie @tearyjjeon @kookrecs @bintificreads @minisugakoobies

series masterlist | main masterlist | Part Two

[whytheylosttheirminds]

june gloom - part 2: is this gonna end ever?

(Rafe Cameron x pogue!reader, 6.9k words)

part 1

summary: Six months after Rafe walked out of your life, you're finally picking up the shattered pieces he left in his wake. When you accidentally find yourself working at his wedding, your thrown right back into the chaos you thought you were free from.

content: angst/smut, 18+ minors do not interact!, mentions of alcohol abuse and drugs, mentions of cheating, what could be considered infiedelity

a/n: as a fair warning, the angst only gets worse in this one. however, I promise the third and final part will see a satisfying and happy ending for these two if you stick with me. also, this one got wordy, but after struggling with it for a while i'm very happy with how it turned out. thank you to this anon for inspo and for everyone's support on pt. 1.

₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ *˚˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ *˚˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊

Crickets chirped a chorus around you as you laid back on the flannel blanket, the grass beneath making a soft pillow for your head. Your lips wrapped around the blunt, lungs expanding to welcome the smoke. You hummed in pleasure as the high-end strain went down way smoother than any of the trash you would usually get on The Cut.

“God, this is good shit,” you said with a lazy smile.

“Only the best for you,” Rafe smirked, leaning over on the blanket to pull the joint from your lips so he could join in your revelry.

He took a long drag and let it go in a smoke ring that rose above you and disappeared into the starry sky. You tried and failed to stifle your laugh.

“What’s funny?” He asked, eyes glazed over with his high.

“Nothing,” you chuckled. “Just…what frat house did you learn that in?”

“Shut up,” he teased back, making you laugh harder.

“No, I’m sure the sorority girls found that very sexy,” you continued.

“They did actually, thank you,” he joked. “You would’ve too.”

“Yeah right, I’d make a great Phi Beta Whateverthefuck,” you huffed sarcastically.

“Did you go to college?” He asked.

You’d known Rafe for about three months, spending nearly every night together since you first met at that club. You had talked about just about everything under the sun except yourselves, you were caught off-guard by this excavation into your history.

“Um, no,” you answered, taking the blunt back from him.

“Why not?”

You shrugged, taking another hit, “didn’t wanna.”

“Do you regret it?” He continued.

You sat up and pulled your knees to your chest, looking down at him with a frown.

“What?” He questioned.

“Why the sudden interest?” You said, harsher and less playful than you’d intended to.

Rafe sat up next to you, pulling his knees towards himself to mirror you. His eyes were intense on your face as he mumbled, “you don’t want me to get to know you?”

Truthfully, you wanted that and so much more, but you couldn’t tell him that. You knew this was just a way for him to pass the time until he could get you in bed again, and maybe you were okay with that. You decided you’d entertain the line of questioning, just this once, not knowing then that this was just the first of many deep, meaningful conversations you’d share with him.

You took a deep breath and said, “what do you want to know?”

He looked up at the stars as he considered the answer to that question. You took the opportunity to admire the way the moonlight reflected off of the sharp angle of his jaw.

He decided on “what’s your biggest dream?”

You bit your lip and looked down at your bare feet, digging them into the blanket, not used to this kind of conversation and yet feeling curiously comfortable opening up to him.

“I want to go to India,” you answered honestly. “I read a book when I was a kid about a little girl who grew up in India and I’ve wanted to go ever since.”

Rafe nodded in approval, “that’s a good one. You should go.”

“Yeah, as soon as I win the lottery, it’ll be my first stop,” you joked bitterly.

“Or I could just take you,” he shrugged.

You smiled at him, incredulous. 

“What?” He asked, genuinely unsure of the meaning behind the look you were giving him. You realized he might actually be serious, even though you knew it would never really happen.

“Nothing. That’s sweet,” you smiled. “But I want to get there on my own. I wanna earn it.”

“I can respect that,” he conceded. 

“Anytime you wanna lend me that private jet, though, just hit me up,” you teased.

Rafe chuckled, eyebrows raised, “oh I see…you’re using me.”

“I thought that was obvious,” you smiled coyly. 

“Uh-huh,” Rafe said, playfully shoving your shoulders so you fell back onto the blanket. 

You giggled as he climbed over you, caging you in between his arms as he held himself up, looking down at you, tucked perfectly beneath him.

“I think I’m okay with that.”

He leaned down and kissed you, his tongue sweeping over your bottom lip tenderly, lowering himself down until you were chest to chest…

“Are you listening to me?”

Your friend waved her hand in front of your face, trying to get your attention.

“Sorry, what?” You were pulled from your thoughts.

“I said they want us there at four this friday,” she showed you an email on her phone.

“Oh,” you blinked, coming back to the moment. “Where is it?”

“Some mansion on Figure 8. It’s a wedding, but they're doing like a whole weekend thing, so it’s Friday through Sunday. Last time I worked one of these I made over five hundred.”

When she first told you about the catering gig this weekend, you turned her down. You’d been carefully avoiding the north part of the island for the last six months, and a whole weekend would be a high-risk endeavor. However, you didn’t have to check your bank account to know you were near broke, and Figure 8 was where the real money was made. You agreed and ironed your white button down and black slacks, your go-to outfit for catering gigs.

As you pulled up to the address your friend had sent you, you cursed under your breath. The estate was huge, the old house immaculately kept and towering proudly under a crystal blue sky. You turned down the radio as your beat up car sputtered its way up the long, grand drive.

“We’re definitely not on the south side anymore,” you joked to yourself. 

You pulled around back to the service entrance as directed by your friend’s text and tracked her down in the crowd of other blue collar workers. Everyone was moving quickly, arranging the massive party space according to the wishes of some unseen bride and groom. 

You were put to work right away, polishing silverware and arranging it as instructed by the very specific, color-coded diagram you had been given. Tonight was only the rehearsal dinner, and there were two-hundred names on the guestlist. You chatted with your friend as you did various other chores, speculating about who could possibly be the owner of this massive property.

“Maybe it’s a crime lord,” your friend joked. “Like some mafia type shit.”

“Maybe it’s a celebrity,” you guessed. 

You didn’t have to wonder for long. 

“Hey! A little help here!” A delivery driver called to you as he struggled to lift something large and rectangular out of his truck, the mystery item protected with a large, black sheet.

You ran over to give him a hand, and he directed you to a big easel he had set out, “picture of the happy couple,” he explained. You called your friend over, informing her you were about to have all your questions answered.

Once you had set the canvas down, you asked the delivery driver if you could remove the sheet. “I don’t give a fuck, my job’s done,” he said, hopping back in his truck and driving off. You and your friend giggled as you did a little countdown and drumroll routine. You pulled the sheet away and her mouth fell open

“Of fucking course,” she immediately took out her phone to take a picture.

You stepped back to look at the giant, blown up portrait. Every muscle in your body tensed and the blood drained from your face, you grabbed the back of a nearby chair for support. 

There on the oversized canvas, smiling that perfect, crooked, arrogant, beautiful smile, was Rafe Cameron.

He had his arm around the woman you recognized to be the one he’d left you for, calling off your whirlwind love affair in pursuit of something more optically appealing to his family. He’d found it; they were gorgeous together.

Six months had passed since you’d last seen him. The first few months were the hardest you’d ever faced. At first, you went out almost every night, needing to stay shitfaced to keep your mind from wandering to him or your fingers from dialing his number. Eventually, you had to delete him from your phone, not trusting yourself in those late night moments when you missed him so much you thought you might die. No amount of booze or weed could make you forget the feeling of his hands on your body, the sound of his voice, the look in his eyes when he fucked you that last time. Your friends started getting worried. You blacked out so often, you couldn’t keep a job. After three or four months of your reckless behavior, they called a sort of intervention and convinced you to calm down. 

You decided if you were going to be alone, you’d make yourself good company. 

You stopped drinking, and even gave up cigarettes. It took several false starts, but the patch got you through it. You picked up good habits, too, starting your mornings with yoga and meditation. You were planning to go back to school, tired of career-hopping through dead-end minimum wage jobs. You stopped eating take out so much, started grocery shopping and saving every spare cent you had for a travel fund. You even cut and dyed your hair, finding freedom in the ability to change whenever you wanted, in the fluidity of answering to no one but yourself. You were still untamed, but for the first time in your life, you felt a semblance of control. You decided you’d build a beautiful life even if you had to scratch and claw your way to it. And you’d do it all by yourself.

Slowly, and with the most effort you’d given anything ever, you were finally starting to get over Rafe Cameron.

Or so you thought. Now, standing in his backyard, decorating for his wedding, you felt like you were right back where you were that night in June, lying naked on your bed while he walked out of your life forever.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” A high-pitched, angry voice startled you, pulling your eyes away from the picture.

You whipped your head around to see her, even more stunning than she was in pictures, her wide Disney-princess eyes shooting daggers at you. Your first and most irrational thought was that she somehow knew who you were. The delusion of that concept was quickly made apparent.

“The picture was supposed to stay covered until tonight,” she barked at you and your friend, who looked at you with wide-eyed panic. “Aren’t you the fucking caterers? Why are you even out here?”

“S-sorry,” you stammered out, your mind reeling as it tried to connect to your reality. You picked up the sheet off the ground. “We’ll cover it back up.”

“No, don’t touch it! Where’s your manager?” She demanded, her hands on her hips. “They need to know about this. What are your names?”

Your friend looked at you with wide eyes, you knew she needed this job even more desperately than you did. Plus, she’d stuck her neck out to get you hired and now she’d lose the money and her credibility.

“It was me,” you blurted out. “Not her. Don’t worry, you don’t need to get anyone fired, I’ll just leave.”

It wasn’t a big sacrifice, considering you were already thinking if you stayed another minute you might have a full blown panic attack. At least if you threw yourself under the bus and got fired, your friend would have no reason to question why you ran from the property crying.

“Fine, whatever,” she dismissed your act of loyalty with a wave of her manicured hand while your friend looked at you with grateful eyes. “What’s your name then?”

“Don’t worry about it,” you handed her the sheet, which she snatched from your hands irritably. “I’ll just go.”

You tried to keep your composure as you walked back toward the house, praying you’d remember your way back to your car. Your heart was pounding, your anxiety and shock threatening to bubble over, you could feel tears springing up and your hands shaking.

You rounded one of the many corners of the massive house, finally out of her line of vision, and broke into a sprint. You passed through another courtyard, where more preparations were underway. There were far too many eyes on you. If you remembered correctly, there was only one more turn before the part of the property you were parked on.

Dirt crunching under your feet, you slid around the corner and straight into something hard and large. You let out a sharp “ouch” as your face burned with the force of the collision. To your horror, you realized you’d run into a person. You kept your eyes low, looking at the man’s feet as you held a hand over your face, wondering for a moment if you’d broken your nose. Then, a familiar scent flooded your senses, and you felt a large hand rest on your shoulder. 

“Woah, I’m sorry, are you okay?” Rafe’s voice asked, clearly unaware of who he was talking to, you looked so different than you did six months ago.

You raised your wide eyes to look at him, hand still cradling your throbbing nose. You took him in through rapidly blinking lashes, begging yourself not to cry. His face shifted slowly from concern for a stranger to recognition of someone all too familiar.

He pulled his hand from you in shock, his mouth opening and closing and opening again, trying to form words that just weren’t coming. You knew you needed to get out of there before they did.

“I’m fine,” you said firmly, hoping he understood you were talking about more than just your injured face.

You sidestepped him and kept running, leaving him standing wide eyed and ashen faced as he watched you get into your car and peel away from his home, and away from him. 

₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ *˚˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ *˚˚₊ ˚ ‧₊

The key rattled against the lock, your hands shaking as you tried to get into your apartment. When you finally got the door opened, you peeled off your clothes quickly, as if they were covered in something radioactive. You pulled on a tank and some sleep shorts, fully ready to get in bed and stay there for days. Everything in you was unraveling. The sight and sound of him undoing the steel backbone you had built for yourself. You climbed under the covers, curled into a ball, and sobbed.

You cried so hard, it knocked you out. Without trying to, your body fell into a hazy, uneasy kind of sleep, haunted by images of Rafe. When you woke, blinking confusedly at the fuzzy outline of the time on your alarm clock, it was dark outside. The clock read 11:03pm. You pulled yourself from your bed with a groan, craving something to comfort you in your post-meltdown emptiness.

As you stood at the sink, filling the kettle for some tea, your mind replayed the events of the day. He’s getting married tomorrow. The rehearsal dinner that you helped set up for was probably over by now. You pictured him saying goodnight to her with a kiss, hanging his tux for the morning, making sure he had the rings ready. You already knew you’d lost him, but the permanence of tomorrow’s events felt like a boot on the neck of the small part of you that still wondered what if.

Your phone rang out loudly on the kitchen table, making you jump, so startled you almost dropped the tea kettle, the water now overflowing. You set the kettle down on the stove and turned on the burner before looking at your phone screen, which read “unknown number.” You hit decline and let it go to voicemail. After a minute, you poured your tea and sat at the table, watching as your phone lit up again with notification of a new voicemail. You unlocked it and pressed play.

You knew the voice immediately, though it was coming out slurred and strained. You clutched the phone to your ear with both hands to hear better.

“Heyyyy baby. It’s me. I’m sorry for calling so many times, blowin’ up your phone and you’re probably out somewhere, looking fuckin’ gorgeous like always. Shit there’s probably guys lined up to take you home. Do you remember when we met? Fuck you looked so hot. I thought if you said no to going home with me I might literally die. But you said yes! You said yes and you took me home and we, fuck…god…it was so good, you’re so good. Not just the sex. I mean, yes your pussy is so perfect, but…shit it’s raining…but you were- you are…jesus Rafe get it together. I can’t remember what I was saying. I’m so drunk, I- ouch, fuck!- I miss you, baby. It's cold out here but I don’t care, I couldn’t be there anymore. I couldn’t listen to them talk about this fucking wedding. Fucking flowers and table settings and shit I don’t care about any of that…just, please…baby…I need-”

Your phone beeped loudly, the voicemail cut off for length. You replayed it, twice. Outside your kitchen window, you could see the rain getting heavy. The low was in the 30s tonight, and it was supposed to keep raining for hours. You couldn’t hear much in the background behind Rafe’s drunken rambling, but you could tell he was outside. You pictured him stumbling into a ditch somewhere. He had hurt himself on the voicemail, did he fall? You couldn’t stand the thought of him alone, out in the cold rain, hurt.

Despite every instinct, you pulled up the number he called from and texted him.

Today 11:14pm

Where are you?

Today 11:16pm

‘Unknown’ shared their location with you.

You grabbed your coat and keys and ran out the door before you had time to second guess yourself. You found him lying on the beach, his clothes soaked through from the rain that was still falling heavily. He’d clearly thrown up, just a few feet from where he was laying now. You ran to his side and quickly checked that he was breathing.

“Jesus, Rafe,” you recoiled at the overwhelming aroma of booze radiating off of him.

His eyes flew open at the sound of your voice. 

“Baby?” he groaned.

“We gotta get out of here, Rafe,” you struggled to help him up.

With an enormous amount of effort, you got him into your car. He leaned his head against the cold window as you drove, his breath fogging up the glass with each exhale. You looked over at him every few seconds to make sure he was still conscious. 

Once in your apartment, stumbling through the door with his arm over your shoulder, you led him into the bathroom, guiding him to sit on the edge of the tub while you ran the shower, water heating slowly.

You tapped his arms. 

“Up,” you instructed. He lifted his arms obediently and looked up at you through half-lidded eyes as you peeled off his wet polo, doing everything you could to avoid staring at his bare torso.

“Think you can do the rest yourself?” You motioned to his lower half.

“No,” he said with a smirk.

“Rafe,” you warned, not playing around.

“I can do the rest myself,” he said with his hands up in defense. 

You left him in the bathroom fumbling with his belt. While he showered, you brewed a pot of coffee and poured two steaming mugs, sitting uneasily at the table when he finally emerged from the bathroom. He was in only his boxers and you blushed aggressively, as if you hadn’t seen him naked a hundred times before. He caught the redness in your cheeks as you looked down at your hands, swallowing hard.

“Sorry,” he said earnestly. “My clothes are still wet.”

You pushed back your chair and walked to your bedroom, returning with folded clothes in your hands. He looked suspiciously at the men’s t-shirt and basketball shorts you gave him, cocking his eyebrow at you. You just glared back at him, tilting your head slightly as if to say I dare you to give me shit about where I got them. He didn’t push it, pulling them on wordlessly.

“Coffee?” You offered once he was dressed.

“Please,” he slumped into the chair across from you, sipping the coffee with a sigh.

“Feeling better?” You asked.

“Much better, thanks,” he said. “Never mix rum and redbull.”

You snorted, “I could’ve told you that.”

“Well you weren’t there were you?” The sentence started playfully but ended with a bite.

You sipped your coffee, wondering who would be first to acknowledge the elephant in the room. You sat in silence for a few minutes, both drinking your coffee and letting the air grow thick between you.

Finally, he caved and spoke first, “why’d you leave?”

“Why would I stay?” You responded, voice dripping with spite.

“I- I guess I don’t know.” Now it was Rafe avoiding your eyes.

“Does she know…about me?” You asked timidly.

“No,” he mumbled, before sipping up the last drop of his coffee.

“And where does she think you are right now?” 

“My bachelor party.”

“We should get you back there, then.” You stood and collected both mugs, bringing them to the sink.

Rafe scoffed, “you’re kicking me out again?”

“I never kicked you out, Rafe. You left,” you said, clutching the edge of the sink, bracing for an argument.

But he didn’t argue, he just let the silence settle between you for a long moment before finally saying, “I wish I hadn’t. I miss you.”

You turned, expecting to find him still slumped over the table, but he had stood and was now startlingly close. You jolted, squaring your shoulders in defense as he got closer to you.

“Don’t say that,” you pleaded. “I can’t do this with you.”

“Then why’d you come get me?” He asked, his eyelids low as he looked down at you. “Why’d you bring me here?

“Why’d you call me?” You asked back.

“I asked you first,” he said, no playful smile to match his childish words.

“Why does it matter?” You sighed.

“‘Cause it does, it matters to me, please just give me a reason,” his voice grew more desperate as he stepped even closer to you, his looming body caging you against the sink. He searched your face as he waited for you to respond, needing an answer you couldn’t give him.

“Are you gonna marry her?” Your words tightened the tension already growing between you, causing Rafe to close his eyes in frustration.

“I don’t want to talk about her,” he shook his head. 

Rafe lifted his hand slowly, placing it on your waist. He squeezed gently at the soft skin of your side. You leaned into his touch for just a second before coming to your senses.

“Are you? Going to marry her?” You repeated stubbornly.

“Yes,” He said, eyes falling from your face to his hand on your side.

“Then you shouldn’t be touching me,” you grabbed Rafe’s hand and lowered it from you. “I won’t be a mistress. I won’t be that dirty pogue who fucks a married guy, I wanna be something better than that.” 

You slipped out from between him and the sink, pacing to the other side of the room, but his body turned aggressively to follow you.

“You are. You’re so much better,” his voice cracked with urgency as he rushed to reassure you.

You shook your head in anger, raising your voice as you snapped, “then why are you marrying someone else?”

“Because I have to!” He matched your heated tone, as if he was the one to have something to be mad about.

“We’re going in circles, Rafe! We are in the exact same spot we were six months ago! Except I’m a different person now. It changed me, losing you. I got better, I got healthy, I got sober. I got over you!” You were yelling now, searching for the words to make him understand that he wasn’t the only one who had something to lose now.

“Well I didn’t get over you,” he stated simply.

“No, you got engaged,” you pointed out.

“Fuck that, fuck her, you know I don’t love her!” He scoffed. “You saw her today, you know she’s a bitch.”

“That’s really nice, Rafe, you should put that in your vows,” you huffed sarcastically.

“Oh c’mon, she doesn’t love me either,” he rolled his eyes. “She still fucks around, everyone knows it.”

He said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world, but it took you by surprise. You searched his face for a sign as to whether it was true or just something he made up to make you sympathize with him. The way his eyes fell to the ground and the apples of his cheeks blushed slightly told you it was true, she cheated on him, and he was ashamed of it. It made you sick, the thought of someone having him so close and caring so little. The only thing worse than the thought of her treating him like that was the thought of him accepting it as if it was what he deserved. You should’ve felt sad for him, but it just made you angrier.

“Then why, Rafe? Why?” You knew you were becoming a broken record but you just could not wrap your head around his choice. “Why are you still with her?” You hated the way it made you sound like you were blaming him for her actions, but you needed to understand.

“Because I’m going to have to end up with someone like her anyway, I may as well just get it over with,” he said with a resigned shake of his head.

“That’s fucked up, Rafe,” you said, even though you knew he already knew it.

“It is what it is,” he shrugged, defeated.

Your eyes caught the clock on your stove. It was almost 1am. Rafe was supposed to be saying his vows in twelve hours, and you knew if he stood here in your apartment for another minute, looking at you so helplessly, you’d crumble for him.

“I think you should go home,” you said, trying and failing to mean it.

“Not yet,” Rafe said, his tone implying there was something more he was waiting for.

And even though you wanted to, you just couldn’t give it to him. 

Mustering the last of your pride, you took a deep breath and said, “If you’re waiting for me to ask you not to marry her, we’re both gonna be disappointed. I’ve been doing good, Rafe. I got my life together, and I won’t be responsible for ruining someone else’s. It’s not on me, you have to decide. If you don’t want to marry her, then don’t marry her. But do it for you, because I’ve got me covered.”

Rafe considered your words, standing completely still as they washed over him. He had to choose. He could either ruin his reputation and potentially lose his family to be happy with you or keep the lifestyle he’d grown so accustomed to and be miserable with her. He looked so sad, and you desperately wanted to ask him what he was thinking, but you stayed silent, wanting him to say what he was feeling all on his own for once. You needed a simple answer.

But Rafe Cameron never did anything the simple way.

He didn’t say anything,  he just started walking toward you. Once he was close enough to touch you, and your back was against the wall, he reached up to touch your face gently with one finger, silently asking if you were still in pain from your collision earlier. When you didn’t wince or push him away, he leaned down, bringing his lips dangerously close to yours.

“Just one more time, please. Don’t kick me out, be with me one more time,” he whispered against your skin.

You shook your head slowly, whispering back, “I won’t kick you out, but I also won’t let you touch me and then marry her.”

“Fine, I won’t touch you.” 

Rafe leaned back, only slightly, pulling his face away so you were level with his chest. He folded his hands behind his back to show you he meant it. You could smell his familiar musk, his chest so close to your face you could hear his heartbeat as you looked up at the pulsing veins in his neck. His hair, still wet from the shower, flopped messily over his forehead. A single drop fell from his bangs and landed on your collarbone. Rafe’s eyes darkened as he tracked the droplet rolling across your exposed skin, down your chest, over the curve of your tits and finally disappearing into your tank top.

Eyes locked to Rafe’s, you lifted your hand slowly, placing it over the spot the water had fallen, sliding your fingers delicately down the drop’s path. When you reached the neckline of your tank top, Rafe’s eyes consuming every movement, you reached up with your other hand and lowered one of the straps of your top slowly. You dragged your hand down further, cupping your breast through your lacy bralette and biting your lip at the pressure.

Rafe’s jaw clenched. He put one hand on the wall next to your head to steady himself, bringing his body impossibly closer while still not touching you. His other hand fell to his side, moving dangerously close to his dick.

“You better not touch yourself either, or I swear to god I’ll stop,” you warned him.

“Don’t stop,” He brought the drifting hand up to the wall on the other side of your head. “Please, baby.”

Butterflies erupted in your stomach at his voice, raspy and strained with need. With two hands on the hem of your shirt, you pulled it slowly over your head, leaving you in just the see-through undergarment. 

“Take that off too,” Rafe tried to sound dominant, but his voice cracked, betraying him.

“You’re not in any position to make demands,” you scolded with a shake of your head. “And you’re not going to see me naked. You have a fianceé for that.”

Rafe was pained by this, his nostrils flailing as he clenched his jaw in frustration. You ignored him and put your hands back on your body, palming both of your tits again before trailing lower over your stomach. Rafe’s tongue darted out of his mouth and licked his lips as he watched the way your stomach flexed with anticipation, hands finally landing on the waistband of your sleep shorts. One hand pulled the elastic back while the other slid beneath it slowly. When your fingers ran over the fabric of your panties, teasing your clothed clit, your head fell back against the wall and your jaw fell slack. Rafe ran one of his hands through his hair as he watched pleasure flood your face, desperate to touch something, anything. The hand still on the wall closed into a fist. You started rubbing circles over your clit through your panties, the fabric already soaked through, wet since the sight of him in his boxers. Your breath hitched when you found the perfect rhythm and you closed your eyes tight, a melodic moan rising from your throat.

“Fuck baby, you’re so fucking sexy,” Rafe growled through gritted teeth.

Your eyes flew open and you pulled your hand from your shorts, suddenly very aware of the lack of space between you and the vulgarity of what you were doing. You slid under his arm and hurried to the other side of the kitchen.

“You should go,” you whispered, wrapping your arms around yourself and shivering at the sudden loss of his warmth.

Rafe stayed still, trying not to spook you. His head dipped low, looking down at his ringing hands.

“I missed you,” he mumbled helplessly.

“You mean you missed fucking me?” You asked spitefully.

One agonizingly slow step at a time, Rafe crossed the room. You turned from him as if to push him away, literally giving him the cold shoulder. But he wasn’t deterred, he just got closer and closer until he was right behind you, close enough for his breath to sweep across your shoulder as he said, “yeah, what if I do? I miss it so much. There’s not a day that passes without me wishing I was here, fucking you so good you scream my name.”

His arrogant words made you so fucking angry, and so fucking wet.

What little resistance you had mustered disappeared. Breathless, you whispered, “what else do you miss?”

“I miss your little moans,” he continued, the corner of his lips raising slightly at the sight of the goosebumps that shot up your arms. “I bet you still cry out for me when you make yourself come, don’t you? I want you to show me.”

“We can’t do this,” you shook your head.

“No, I can’t do this,” he corrected you. “You can do whatever you want.”

No fight left, you took his suggestion, and soon you were laying back on your bed, your shorts thrown on the floor, your hand moving feverishly under your panties. Rafe laid next to you, his body drawn in as close as it could possibly get while keeping his promise not to touch you. You’d made no such promise, the hand you weren’t rubbing over your slick folds gripping his arm for purchase as you moaned at your own touch.

“Talk to me,” you begged.

“Yeah?” He said excitedly, as if he had been waiting for permission. 

You nodded desperately, bringing your eyes to his as one of your fingers dropped down to enter yourself.

“You remember the first time we fucked?” He began. “Right here on this bed. I took you from behind. You were so tight around my cock, like you were fucking made for me.”

You added a second finger, driven by his filthy words. His jaw clenched, restraining himself with more effort than he’d ever given anything as he watched you writhe.

“Keep going,” you whined, eyes squeezed shut.

“I had to turn you around, I had to see that pretty face when you came for me for the first time,” he recalled. “God, I bet you wish it was me stretching you out right now, don’t you? You wish it was my cock pounding you into the mattress until you can’t breathe, huh?”

“Mhm,” you nodded, lips pouting, overwhelmed by the memories and your need to feel him.

“Best pussy I’ve ever had,” he groaned, feeling himself twitching in his pants, desperate for his own release but committed to yours. “I need to see you come, baby, one more time. Please come for me?”

You cried out as you clenched around your own fingers, their size so inadequate with him so close, knowing what he could be doing to you. But you meant what you said, you couldn’t let him touch you, not while his bride was sleeping just across town, no idea her groom was in some pogue’s bed, begging her to come for him. Maybe it was sick, but the thought of him being so desperate for you that he was risking everything with her made your thighs clench around your hand, nearing the edge.

“Tell me about the first time you saw me,” you pleaded, the rasp in your voice warning him you were close. 

“Holy shit, baby, you were so fucking sexy,” he said, rising up from the bed and propping himself on his arm to hover over you, the proximity throwing you into even more of a frenzy. “Dancing in that club, the way you move, shit, I wanted to lay you down on that dancefloor and fuck you right there. So did every other guy in there. But they didn’t get to have you, I did. And I’ve never been the same since I first touched you.”

It was all too much, his words, the memory, the sensation of your fingers sliding in and out so easily, the way he was talking making you so wet. Your high crashed into you like a truck, your back arching off the bed, your chest bumping into his as you came with his name on your lips.

“There she is, that’s my girl,” Rafe exhaled as you rode out your high. Eventually, your muscles gave out from the pleasure and you slumped back into the bed.

He watched you in rapture as your chest rose and fell with labored breaths, struggling to recover. Neither of you knew what to do next, the shock of what just happened washing over you. Your body was so exhausted from the chaos of the day and the aftershocks of your orgasm, all you wanted was him, and you were too tired to fight it.

“Rafe?” You whispered into the darkness of your bedroom, the light of the moon the only thing illuminating the small space.

“Yeah?” He whispered back.

“Can you hold me?” Your voice sounded so small, and you hated the vulnerability of your request, but at this moment the only thing you wanted in the world was to feel his arms around you.

“I thought you didn’t want me to touch you?” He teased gently.

“I said I’m getting better, not that I’m perfect,” you smiled, turning your body towards him. “And I want to know what it feels like to fall asleep in your arms. Just once.”

“Is it gonna be an issue?” He asked. You knew what he really meant was, “are you going to regret sleeping with an engaged man?”

The answer was yes, but you didn’t care.

“Just let me be a little selfish,” you said, turning around so your back was against his chest, pulling his arm around you. “I had you first.”

“You still have me,” he whispered against your neck, pulling your body into his.

“Shhh,” you said, lifting your fingers gently to his lips. “Go to sleep, Rafe.”

He smiled and did as he was told.

₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ *˚˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ *˚˚₊ ˚ ‧₊

The sunlight landing on your face is what woke you from the deepest and sweetest sleep you’d had in six months. Your first instinct was to smile, humming in satisfaction as you stretched your well rested muscles.

Your second instinct was to reach for him. 

You shouldn’t be surprised, shouldn’t pull your knees to your chest, shouldn’t be crying alone in your cold bed. Of course he left. He was always going to leave.

Some small, pathetic voice in the back of your mind said, “maybe he just went to break things off with her.”

Even though it made you feel like the most pitiful girl in the world, you checked his location, still available from the night before. He was on Figure 8, the address you had gone to yesterday. He was at his wedding. 

He had wanted you to ask him not to marry her. He never would’ve said it, but you could see it on his face. He had too much to lose, too many people depending on him, too much weight on his shoulders. But maybe he would’ve given it all up, if only you’d asked.

You threw your phone across the room in frustration. Maybe you should’ve just asked him to stay with you, maybe you should’ve put your pride aside this one time, maybe this was all your fault. 

You were up and out of bed before you had time to talk yourself out of it. You pulled on your catering clothes from the night before. Surely, they wouldn’t let you in the gate if you looked like some wedding crashing pogue, but maybe you could slip in undetected if it seemed like you still worked there.

You don’t even remember driving there, your stomach on fire with nerves and something that might even be excitement, as you raced across the island. The clock in your car read 1:03pm, and you prayed to whatever god was listening that the ceremony had started late.

As you planned, they let you right in the gate when you said you were with the caterer. You didn’t even bother to park at the service entrance, your tires squealing as you came to a stop right in front of the house, leaving the engine running as you ran towards the ceremony site. You could hear music playing in the distance, hoping it was the processional. 

But when you turned the corner, you heard a large crowd break into applause. You came to a halt, backing up to hide under the cover of a tree a few yards from the end of the aisle. You watched as Rafe appeared, his beaming bride on his arm. He dipped her low, giving her a kiss as the crowd cheered again, the gold ring on his left hand glinting in the sunlight.

You were too late.

₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ *˚˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ *˚˚₊ ˚ ‧₊ .:･˚₊ ˚ ‧₊

pt. 3 coming soon

[reiderwriter]

♡ Girls Just Wanna Have Fun ♡

Week 5 of my Playlist Series ♡

Summary: Spencer isn't used to clubs, but when duty calls, he's made to feel a little bit more welcome by a girl who seems to know him better than a stranger should.

Warnings: Smut 18+ Minors DNI!! Hotchner!Reader (Reader is Hotch's sister), semi-public sex (x2 oops), oral sex (m receiving), fingering, dry humping, hand job, cum play, dirty talk, degradation and name calling (slut only), use of daddy/sir even though this is like solidly season 1 Spencer lmao, corruption kink, loss of virginity (surprisingly the readers)

A/N: Every single intrusive thought I've ever had about s1 Reid tied up in a nice little bow masquerading as a song fic. It is finished, and now I feel flushed. Please expect only fluff from me until my next intrusive thought (maybe half an hour, probably no longer).

Masterlist || Spotify Playlist

Flashing lights and the scent of dried up alcohol stains weren't usually signs of Spencer Reid's presence. He'd managed to get through college - two degrees and three PhDs - without stepping foot into a nightclub. But now that he'd joined the BAU, it seemed to be an unavoidable occurrence. 

“The unsub hunts at this nightclub, I get that, I do. But why am I the one going in? He's targeting women,” he panicked as his older team member helped adjust his clothes to conceal the weapon he carried. 

“Because, pretty boy, it's student night, and you're the only one here who can pass for a 21 year old. I guess late puberty has some benefits.” Derek smacked his arm playfully, leaving the younger man wincing slightly. 

“But I'm not a woman.” 

“Yes, but you'll be able to walk around and note any suspicious behaviour, and then we can tail suspects you flag,” Hotch explained to him again. 

“Just act natural, kid, it's not like it's your first time in a club.” 

“It is.” His warnings fell on deaf ears though, as they pushed him out of the van and into the crowd of students queueing to enter. 

It didn't take you long to notice him after you arrived at the club.

The sweater vest was enough to make him stand apart slightly, as much as he was trying his best to blend in. A slight tingle of familiarity raced up your spine as his eyes awkwardly met yours, his scan of the room stopping short as he flushed and turned his eyes down. 

Pushing slightly to the crowd, you leaned over the counter next to him and tried to get the bartenders attention. It was loud and busy, but catching attention and keeping it was a skill you'd mastered early, a skill that you were thankful for as you realised the man's eyes were guiltily flicking between your ass and the crowd once again. 

“Are you going to stare, or are you going to introduce yourself,” you giggled, sliding closer to his perch at the bar, as he panicked, standing straighter. 

“I wasn't, um… your dress, there's a rip at the edge of your skirt, I was trying to figure out if it was part of the design because I know some clothes these days have damage built into the design, or if it was in need of some emergency… sewing.” His hands gesticulating awkwardly throughout his explanation, as if anxious to show you the jumble in his brain was entirely pure and innocent, even as the flush on his face said otherwise. 

“And your name is?” 

“I-.... Spencer. My name is Spencer.” 

You stood a little straighter hearing the name, that familiarity warming you more. Spencer. Spencer. Spencer. You turned the name over in your head but took another step closer as the crowd shifted in a wave, feeling the heat coming off his body. 

“Well, Spencer,” your tongue made the decision to act for your brain, the words coming out before you could stop them. “What conclusion did you draw? Do you think the rip was intentional or not?” 

Gently, you grabbed his hand and led it to the fabric. The skirt wasn't scandalously short, but short enough to suit the dark heated atmosphere of the club at least, but as his fingers grazed the back of your thighs, still hesitant in his actions, you found yourself wishing it were just that bit higher, so his hands would have to reach further up. 

With a gaze over your shoulder at the crowd, Spencer found himself at an impass. He'd already noted a few people of interest, loiterers, men getting a bit rough and aggressive in the club, people on the outskirts (like him, he supposed) that could possibly be their unsub. 

He'd been given the all clear to disengage and leave the club as effortlessly as he could  bit something in your initial gaze had pinned him to place at the bar, and refused still to let him see reason. 

“I think it's a design feature. To draw attention to…” he swallowed hard, but you weren't sure if he was just being delicate about his words or if he was reacting to the hand that was now on him, dragging nails up from his abdomen to his chest. 

“Good observation, Spencer.” 

“Your name. You didn't tell me what your name was.” He said, grabbing your hand to stop its progress and breathing deeply as if to clear his head. 

“Y/N. We should dance.” Without giving him time to react, you abandoned your drink on the counter and pulled his arm around your waist, dragging him out to the crush of people in the middle of the dance floor. 

His protests were lost in the pulse of the music, as you kept your back to him and began grinding and swaying against him. His hands tightened on your hips as he gently started moving with you, and you threw your head back to catch his eye again. 

Spencer didn't know what he'd gotten himself into. He knew that very little actually dancing actually went on at a club, that this was just a more polite socially acceptable form of foreplay, but he didn't know that it would have such an effect on him. 

A mess of sweaty, intoxicated people spilling drinks and other fluids, and he thought he'd stay there forever if it kept your hips torturing his cock like that. 

When you glanced up at him, he was a man lost to his senses, lust clouding his eyes, mouth slightly open in a pant, you reached up to his neck and pulled his lips down to meet yours. 

You were surprised when it was his to guess to reach out first, his hand that trailed under your shirt without tours guiding it. You'd picked up a fairly innocent man at the bar and turned him into a pervert in the space of one dance. It felt like the club was watching you, how his hands grazed the skin under your breasts and caused the shiver up your spine, how your back arched to press deeper against his election. 

You may have tempted him into taking this risk, but he was the one gleefully nosediving into his fall from grace. 

“Spencer,” you whispered as he came up for air, lips resting at your ear. “I think we should get some fresh air.” 

Something in that seemed logical. It was colder outside. Maybe it would cool off whatever had lit him up like a pyre on the dance floor. Maybe the fresh air would clear his head. Or maybe just the open space would help him detangle his hands from you, would lead his thoughts away from burying himself deep in you. 

He would gladly take you outside, bid you farewell, and return to his job and his life. It was a solid exit for his first cover - who was going to question the young lovers leaving together. 

You had a feeling that the idea of outside would have Spencer pulling away from you, but you hadn't had your fill of fun just yet. 

So just as you led him onto the dancefloor, you kept a hand over his, around your waist, and you guided him out of the club, down the street a few paces, and into a darkened alleyway. 

“Y/N, we shouldn't be-” he tried to stutter out as you pulled him in for another kiss. His brain was trying to protest, but his hands were already back on your ass, pulling you up and closer to him. 

“What was that?” You said between kisses, his mouth launching an assault against each inch of your skin. 

He gasped for breath and pulled back, realising that he'd lifted and pinned you to the cold brick wall of the alley in his haste to feel you pressed against him. 

“Y/N… I don't want to take advantage of you, I'm not-” 

“I'm taking advantage of you, Spencer,” you said, nipping at his neck slowly raking your hands into his shoulders. “Am I allowed to do that? Can I take all of you, Spencer?” 

His eyes rolled back in his head as he let put a groan of pleasure, your lips sucking at the tender flesh of his nape. 

“I-I'm not a student, and-” 

“I know, but you are such a pretty boy that I decided I wanted to have some fun with you.” 

His resolve broke in half as you uttered your compliments, and his lips met yours in a moan as his hands pushed your skirt up around your waist. 

His finger trailed between your hips and his, using the wall to balance you as he pushed aside your panties and began slowly stroking your sex. 

Your hips pitched forward to press more of his slender fingers against you,  desperate to feel him stretch your cunt open first with one, then two, then however many he decided was good enough for you. 

Leaving one hand on his shoulder, you let one trail down his pants, stepping one foot down to allow you access to his zipper. 

He pauses Again for a second as you manage to get his pants open, your hand pulling his cock free from the constraint of his clothing. Spitting on your hand, you wrap around it firmly and slowly pump up and down, looking him directly in the eye as you watch the pleasure pour over him. 

His forehead rests against yours as he melts into your touch, so desperate, needing to cum so badly that he's willing to let it happen in this dark dirty alley. 

“Spencer, I want to have a lot of fun with you. Will you let me?” 

“Yes, fuck Y/N.” He nods, his hips rocking into your hand with each slow stroke you give him. 

“Spencer,” you say, rocking your hips forward and pushing your panties further to the side once again. “Spencer, please fuck me. Take my virginity, Spencer, please.” 

His mind whirled at the sentence, the pleas dropping from your lips. Virginity. You were a virgin. 

You'd had him cock stiff after three minutes of conversation  had pulled him into an alleyway and lost him in a fog of pleasure, and you were still innocent. Untouched. 

You wanted to have your fun with him. You'd chosen him. 

He couldn't articulate the lust that coated his tongue, so he simply pushed it into your mouth  grabbed his cock from your hands, lined himself up with your drippy cunt and pushed in with a single thrust. 

You gasped and let out a moan, not quite fully pleasurable. Your hands again found his shouldend, his back, but your nails were sharper this time, digging in further, almost piercing skin. 

“Fuck, Spencer, yes,” you said, breathing shakily as you slowly started moving around his cock. 

“Did it hurt?” 

“It doesn't hurt anymore. Now, please Spencer, fuck me and don't hold back. It's more fun that way.” 

He pulled your hips closer, moaning as you tightened around him. Pressing one hand against the wall and keeping another hand gripped so hard around your hip you knew it'd bruise, he began moving. 

He began slow, trying not to lose himself in the feel of your unused, tight hole. But with each small moan, each scratch against his back, he lost a little bit more of that control he was begging for. 

With his hands engaged, his brows furrowed I'm frustration that he couldn't stroke your bundle of nerves, he couldn't force you to cum on his cock as quickly as he wanted to. 

“Y/N, look at me.” You opened your eyes at the words, unaware that they'd closed tight as you emptied all other senses to just feel him. 

“Touch yourself. Right there, that's it,” he watched your fingers rub delicately against your skin, spoke little words of encouragement, and told you to increase your speed and pleasure. 

“That's it. That's it, now it's time for you to cum, Y/N. Cum on my cock, rub your little clit for me and cum around my big cock, Y/N.” 

“Shit… shit, shit, shit, Spencer, oh my god.” Your hands shook, and your hips twitched, and with a cry, you reached that high you'd been craving since you met his eyes earlier. 

He pulled out of you, slowly pulling you off the wall, as he held you up, letting your legs regain their strength. His cock was still hard, still coated in your arousal as he took care of you. 

You caught your breath fast, regained tour strength quicker as you noticed he didn't plan on getting himself off anymore. He let you have your fun with him and was happy to end it all there. 

You weren't. 

“Spencer,” you sang again, wrapping a hand once again around his erection as he tried to straighten out your now slightly more ripped skirt. “Spencer, it's more fun of we both cum. I want you to make a mess of my hand, can you do that for me?” 

You stroked his cock with a firmer grip than before, your arousal lubricating each stroke, his pre-cum mingling with it to aid you further. You suddenly wondered what he would taste like, but knew your legs would be too weak to do everything your heart desired today. 

There was always tomorrow. 

He leaned his weight back on the wall behind you, forcing you back as well as you pumped him quickly so desperate to hear him moan your name as he spilt his seed. 

“Y/N,” he moaned, and you were triumphant. His hips jerked once, then twice, then a third time, and he stilled, heaving breaths as he buried his head in your shoulder. 

He swallowed and regained his breath, and as he pulled away, you pulled your fingers to your lips and lapped up the final drops of cum that he left there. 

Most of it had his the wall, dripped to the floor, but you enjoyed these few drops and smiled brightly at him, pulling a handkerchief that you knew would be in his pocket out and cleaning the two of you up. 

He flushed again as he came back to his senses, especially as you attempted to put his clothed to rights, stepping back to replace his softening cock in his pants.

“Well,” you said after setting yourself to rights, “Thank you for the fun night, Spencer. See you tomorrow.” 

You skipped off quickly before he had a second to even process your words. 

The next day at the local precinct was a blur for Spencer as he tried to drag himself from the drug induced haze of meeting you. He'd stroked himself to completion two more times in bed after he returned to his motel room, reliving the sound of you begging him to take you, the words ‘pretty boy’ on your lips as you spread your legs. 

It'd taken his entire brain, or what was left of it, to not jump out of his skin every time Morgan had teased him with the words that morning.

“Now how did you like your first club experience, pretty boy? Did any college cuties throw themselves at you?” 

He spat up his coffee, choosing that moment to choke, and begging god for this to just be the end of Spencer Reid entirely. 

Because there was no way Morgan would actually believe that that was exactly what had happened. 

“Morgan, Gideon wants you in the interrogation room, and- wow, Spencer, you should change your shirt. What are you, 5? You can't drink coffee properly?” Elle said, chuckling slightly.

“I choked,” he frowned, but it fell on deaf ears as his teammates walked away quickly to get back to their jobs. 

He wished he could recover so quickly, even now the image of you having your fun with him the night before playing like a movie in his head. 

Looking down, he realised Elle was right, and he really did need to change his shirt. Hotch always had a few spare on hand, even for cases out of the office. He grabbed some tissues, dabbing against the mess of coffee on his shirt, suddenly thankful for lukewarm police precinct coffee, and started making his way towards Hotch. 

“Hey, Hotch-” he made it three steps before your voice cried out. 

“Ronnie!!” You shouted, throwing your hands around your elder brother as he caught you in a hug. 

“Y/N, we're at a police station. If you're going to come see me, you have to at least call me Aaron.” 

“And not take the chance to embarrass you in front of your peers and coworkers? Not a chance, Ronnie. Not a chance.” He chuckled fondly, brushing away his complaints quickly as he turned to introduce you to JJ first, then Elle and then the frozen statue that had replaced Spencer. 

“And, Y/N, this is Dr. Spencer Reid. Spencer, this is my sister, Y/N. She's a student at the university.” 

You held out your hand with a triumphant grin as Spencer stared in wide-eyed horror at the apparition in front of him. 

“Hello, Spencer. It's very nice to finally meet you. My brother has told me a lot about you, and I'm very excited to pick your brains.” 

The air seemed to explode around Spencer as each breath became deliriously hot, filling his lungs with fire. It was moments before he realised that he wasn't actually breathing at all, and the air was actually quite normal. 

Your hand remained out, ready to greet him, and to the surprise of his coworkers, he took it in his for a short shake. 

“Y/N. Hotch's sister, Y/N. Nice to meet you, Y/N Hotchner, Hotch's sister.” 

He could practically hear the audible sound of Elle and JJ smacking a hand against their faces in horror at his stupidly obvious reaction to the woman in front of him. If he wasn't careful, he'd be spouting confessions of desire soon, and knowing that Aaron Hotchner carried two guns on his person even now did nothing to calm his thoughts. 

“Okay, well, Y/N, I'm busy with some interrogations now, but I can drive you back to your apartment in half an hour if you're okay to wait with JJ?” 

“Are you busy, Spencer?” You asked instead, keeping her eyes locked on the man who still weakly shook her hand, unaware of when the right time to stop would be. 

“I was serious when I said I wanted to pick your brain, my brother said you had a PhD in Engineering and I'm struggling through a class right now that I need some guidance in if you can spare five minutes?” 

Spencer stared between Hotch and you, looking for the right answer to please present itself before he imploded right there. 

“Yes. PhD, I have a PhD. Three actually, but whose counting? Me. I just counted them. One of them is in mathematics, actually, so I guess I'm always counting.” He finally dropped your hand, and you gave him a wider smile that dropped his heart to his stomach. “I am free, unless you needed me for something else, Hotch?” 

His gaze was pleading, though he wasn't sure if he was begging for his life, five more minutes alone with you or the power to extricate himself from this situation entirely, but Hotch nodded his acceptance quickly and let you lead Spencer off to the small, empty visitors room at the opposite side of the precinct. 

You shut the door behind you when you walked in, leaning over to close the blinds as well before you turned back to Spencer. 

“Your shirt is wet. You should probably take it off,” you giggled as you trailed a hand up his arm once again. 

His hand grabbed yours before you could do any more damage to his tender nerves than you'd already managed that morning. 

“You knew the entire time? Who I was?” 

“I walked over because you seemed familiar, but I only figured it out when you said your name. My brother does talk about you a lot.”

“Hotch is going to kill me,” he said, slumping down into the chair behind him. “Y/N, your brother was outside the club. He could've seen us leave.” 

You climbed into his lap, and his eyes finally met yours again, his tongue stopping its hopeless tirade as you relaxed into his chest. 

“I have two older brothers, Spencer. Do you know how often they've been able to tell me what to do?” Your hands started down his shirt, making quick work of the buttons as he stared up, enthralled. 

“Not once have they been able to stop me from doing something I wanted.” 

He scoffed quickly, unable to help himself. Your hands gripped either side of his face and lifted his head to meet your gaze again. 

“And right now, Spencer, I really want you.” A roll of your hips was enough to have him hissing and grabbing your hips. You started steadily rocking into him, eyes still locked with his. 

“Y/N, please let's be sensible.” 

“I don't want to be sensible, I want to have fun. I want to suck your dick right here, and let you cum in my mouth. I want to scream your name and let everyone know who is giving me pleasure. Can't I do that, Spencer?” 

“No,” he groaned, his eyes screwed shut as you dry humped him, trying to get yourself off on his lap, his.cock rising with each of your quiet moans. 

“Spencer, please. I want your big, hard cock back inside me. Please, please, please. I'll be a good girl, I promise.” 

His eyes shot open in incredulity as he watched you use his body as you saw fit. 

“Good girls don't lose their virginities in alleyways, Y/N. Good girls don't throw themselves at their brothers' coworkers. Good girls listen when they're told no, and don't try to suck cock in public, like little sluts.” He spat each word at you, bit you enjoyed each insult he hurled your way, enjoyed the way his body recoiled as he finally called you a slut. 

He seemed slightly shocked by his anger himself, but you didn't seem to care. It took you only seconds after to push your lips against his again and have your hands on his cock once again, pulling him out of his pants as his hands explored you just as eagerly. 

“Yeah, Spencer, your little slut. I'm such a little slut for you, please fuck me.” 

He buried a hand in your hair, tipping your head back so his tongue could probe deeper, his other hand already under your shirt and teasing one nipple. You lifted your hips and sunk down onto his cock, neither of you stopping to think again about your actions as you began to rode him. 

“30 minutes, Y/N, by now we have 24 minutes and 17 seconds. Can you manage that, Y/N?” 

“Yes, sir.” You said, feeling his dick twitch as you rode him. “Oh did you like that? You liked me calling you, sir?” His hips pressed up again, his body answering more honestly than his tongue. 

“What else can I call you? Spencer… sir….daddy?” 

He broke away from his place buried in your neck to push the two of you down to the floor, the new angle had you gasping as a hand covered your mouth stifling any screams you could make before you made them. 

“Be quiet and cum on my cock, Y/N,” he whispered and picked up his pace, one hand gagging you while the other pulled painfully at your nipple, pinching it between two hands and using it to lift your entire chest so your body was arched toward him, letting him go deeper. 

“Yes, Daddy,” you whispered again, against his fingers, tempted to wrap your lips around one and suck it into your mouth. 

“Fuck, just call me Spencer, Y/N.” 

But you couldn't respond, suddenly overcome with the numbness of you orgasm washing over you as you bit back a choked cry. 

“That's it, good job, Y/N. You listen so well, good job.” He rubbed soothing circles into your chest as his hips slowed, working you through your orgasm as he withdrew once again. 

This time though, he didn't try to pull away and leave himself hard, but sat himself up, and lifted you once again too, putting slight pressure at the back of your head until you were on your knees and letting your head fall down, down, down as your lips wrapped around his wet cock. 

You took him in your mouth, and tasted the bitter, salty flavor of your illicit activities, lapping every last bit of your joint pleasure up as he pushed your hair up and down his cock. 

It didn't take long for his hips to press up into your mouth slightly harder than before, his hands holding you steady as he came down your throat. He held your head there for a minute two, as you tried your best to breathe and stay there, taking as much of his cum down your throat as you could. He pulled your head off him and you swallowed the rest, smiling brightly at him as you did so. 

“Thank you for the fun, Spencer,” You said again, grabbing your phone and checking the time. 

Standing up, you pulled your clothes back in place, pulling your skirt down and your panties up, smoothing out the tangles in your hair. 

“Let me go get you that spare shirt, Doctor Reid,” you said, opening the door. “I'm very grateful for your help with my class load, sir.” 

His head fell back into his hands as you closed the door, leaving him to wonder just what the hell he'd got himself in for. 

[peterm4rker]

¿dónde está la biblioteca? || z.cl

In which SMU’s star basketball player zhong chenle is threatened to be benched for the season because of his failing spanish grade, marking the end of his life as he knows it.

or

In which SMU’s resident spanish tutor y/n l/n is suddenly being harassed by a random dance major, begging her to tutor his best friend before he spirals further into depression (or finishes the third tub of cookie dough ice cream he did not buy.)

★ pairing ;; basketballcaptain!chenle x spanishtutor!reader

★ genres ;; social media au, written parts, college au, slowburn, fluff, strangers to friends to lovers.

★ featuring ;; ph1, aespa, bnd, riize, other nct units.

★ warnings ;; profanity, sexual jokes and innuendos, death jokes, alcohol use, maybe weed consumption, let me know if theres more!

★ status ;; completed!

★playlist ;; here

★ taglist ;; closed!

★ blue's corner ;; so, i can't say im not absolutely terrified to post this, but im also sooo excited to share it! i think the lack of chenle content in this app is criminal, so i wanted to put my own little grain of salt to change that. i do want to say that this is totally self indulgent since i'm a native spanish speaker and because of that i ask you to be patient with me if you notice a lot of spelling mistakes or a sentence doenst really make sense, but i appreciate if you'd let me know if that happens!

★ please do not copy, adapt or steal any of the content !!!

YANGYANG HATE CLUB || markhyuk fanclub😍😍|| pro ballers

zero. I DO NOT??

one. 𝖎 𝖜𝖎𝖑𝖑 𝖕𝖗𝖔𝖙𝖊𝖈𝖙 𝖞𝖔𝖚

two. LOW BLOW

three. oh !

four. ha... haha... ha

five. matate

six. what the fuck was that (written)

seven. debby downer

eight. what does my asthma have anything to do with this

nine. sorry pookie🙏

ten. chat am i cooked?

elven. WHOS THAT GIRLLL

twelve. oh?

thirteen. i think i fucked up

fourteen. missing ludovica hours

fifteen. critical thinking skills

sisxteen. where the fuck did alberto come from? (half written)

seventeen. cry about it

eighteen. not the despair slide...

nineteen. are you jelly?

twenty. seek help

twenty one. i need to leave (written)

twenty two. word

twenty three. good kitten

twenty four. are you shitting me? (written)

twenty five. oh hey

twenty six. VOLDEMORT DOESNT LIKE YOU

twenty seven. girl…

twenty eight. were you silent or silenced

twenty nine. PRETTY IS BACK

thirty. the og friend group combiners

thirty one. lowkey......

thirty two. hola linda, (written)

thirty three. this psycho

thirty four. just for me

EXTRAS

who is jisung reading fanfiction about?

© peterm4rker, 2024

[miabebe]

Reverse Trope Series - Accidently Kidnpping A Mafia Boss (Teaser)

Kidnapping the Yoon Jeonghan was not on your 2024 bingo but sometimes, shit happens right?

Pairing - Yoon Jeonghan x afab!reader

Word Count - Teaser is 1.3K, I'm not gonna promise a number for the full fic just yet

Genre - Strangers to something more than that I guess? Crack because there’s ‘dumb’, ‘dumber’, ‘dumbest’, and ‘dumbest of them all’ so you can imagine and also angst, just a small splash and smut. Loads of it (not here but in the full fic)

Warnings - none for the teaser, mentions of kidnapping and mafia. (But just to be clear, this is not like your usual mafia fics - it’s not dark, there’s no violence and things of that sort)

Estimated posting date - I have a shit ton on my plate right now so I don’t want to stress myself out with a deadline! If you want to be in the loop, please follow me or join the taglist by commenting, sending a message or an ask, thank you!

Thank you @taechwita613 for bearing my annoying self yet again 💕

"You're being a real pain in my ass right now." 

"I don't see how it’s an issue since that’s not much of an ass." 

Seokmin glared at Seungkwan.

"Just because some stupid college club awarded you a silly superlative-"

"-best bakery in town is not a ‘silly’ superlative-"

"-like once-"

"-twice. In a row-" 

"-doesn't mean-" 

"-absolutely does-" 

"Will you two shut up?" You hissed under your breath looking around. "Are you trying to get us all caught?" 

Seungkwan clicked his tongue annoyed. "You're acting like we're in the middle of a crime." 

Your eyes flickered from Seokmin to Seungkwan before landing on the third guy between them, the one who was unconscious and being held up with his arms thrown over the shoulders of your friends. 

"Last I checked, kidnapping is a crime." You pointed out.

Seokmin rolled his eyes. "Pranking your friend isn't."

"That is if Soonyoung decides he wants to save your sorry ass."

"Again, not much of an ass-" 

"I swear to god Kwan-" 

Groaning you covered your ears to shut out all the bickering. 

That night when drunk Soonyoung had pushed your buttons, consequently leading to the events of tonight, you did not think it would be this hard. 

The plan was simple - on Mondays Soonyoung was in charge of closing the BBQ shop where all 3 of your closest friends worked part time. His routine was fairly straightforward - first he clears and cleans all the tables, then he closes the kitchen, then changes out of his uniform and finally wraps it up by locking the main door. 

That's where you would get him, right as he closed the doors. You were to take him by surprise from the back, cover his face with a black cloth bag then bring him to your apartment and tie him up leaving him immobile, blinded and helpless. 

One might wonder why such cruelty when you called him a friend but you would argue that Soonyoung deserved it. After all that night, he hadn't stopped mentioning how you were boring and your life was so uninteresting and you didn't have a single exciting adventure while he had a shit ton of them. Well, today you were about to give yourself, and him, a story to tell.

Now things did go according to plan, for the most part. Seokmin and Seungkwan were first reluctant to be a part of this madness but that was until you brought up the prospect of Soonyoung being scared enough to hopefully piss in his pants. Intrigued by the idea, they joined and all three of you waited in the bushes, watching your friend's silhouette moving around the shop, putting things away, cleaning up. Just as he reappeared after changing, hurriedly trying to leave the shop, the three of you got to action, approaching him silently from the back, swiftly holding him by the hands and putting the bag over his face. 

What you didn't take into account in this plan was just how much resistance Soonyoung would show, God knows why you didn't consider his adrenaline driven reaction, but man did he put up a fight. It was only natural you retaliate and so instinctively, you landed a smack on his head with the torch in your hand knocking him out, making him buckle into the pavement as the two other boys caught him, looking at you bewildered.

That was perhaps just the beginning of your problems because now you had to very unsuspiciously drag a very unconscious man to your apartment in the dead of the night. It would have helped if this neighbourhood was even a little sketchy but being a quiet, painfully uneventful suburb meant even the smallest of things was seen with high scrutiny. 

So far, the three of you had somehow managed to make it from the restaurant to your building undetected but it was getting from the first floor to your house that was the real task since the building's resident old woman decided she wanted to feed the stray cats at 2 am. 

"How much longer are we gonna have to do this?" Seungkwan groaned. "He's surprisingly not that heavy but my arm is starting to sleep."

"Yeah, this joke isn't as funny anymore-" 

"Will you two just keep quiet?" You turned to them annoyed. "She'll be gone in a few minutes and then we can move. Didn't you guys say you wanted Soonyoung to shut up for a few days?” 

Seokmin mumbled a yes under his breath while Seungkwan nodded hesitating. Hoping for some silence after this, you turned to watch the old woman stroking the cat softly as it slowly nibbled its food. Although your patience was really being tested, something told you if you didn't go through this plan, in another 40 years, you'd be exactly like that old lady - lonely, boring and feeding stray cats. Terrified by that thought, you held it together even though it took a whole 15 minutes for the scene to clear. As the three, no four of you, proceeded towards your apartment, the stray cat watched, licking its paw. 

Seungkwan and Seokmin groaned in relief as they half threw Soonyoung onto the chair you pulled to the middle, rubbing their aching shoulders. Scouring the drawers, you pulled out a rope with a soft “aha” making them turn towards your unnaturally happy self. Soonyoung stirred in his chair.

“You're a little too excited about this-” 

“Shhh!” You covered Seokmin's mouth with your hand, whispering. “If you talk, he'll know it's us, then it's not scary anymore.”

“Frankly, I think the kidnapping and knocking him out cold must have been scary enough already.”

“Not enough” You glared as Soonyoung let out a soft groan, letting you know he was coming around. “Quick, take my phone and open that AI app. We'll type what we want to say and use the bot voice - that way he'll have no idea.” 

All three of you huddled, glancing at the phone as Seungkwan typed something quickly, pressing play to let the low toned automated voice echo through the room. 

“I cannot wait to see Soonyoung shit his pants.”

Seokmin giggled as your lips curled into a pleased smile. Oh, he was surely going to shit his pants. 

“And why would I do that?” Soonyoung's voice sounded confused.

“Because we-” 

Seokmin looked up, freezing mid-sentence, noticing the voice did not come from the person before him. 

All three of you exchanged looks realising the same before slowly turning around. Soonyoung  was standing at the entrance like he just walked in, looking bewildered. 

Before any of you could process the situation, he pointed over your shoulders, frowning.

“And who's that?”

Oh. 

“And why is he wearing my clothes?” 

Oh no.

You turned back to see the man in question, slowly pull the black bag from over his head, shaking his golden tresses away from his face. Oh lord was he gorgeous. 

As he blinked his eyes open, wondering where the hell he was, you were busy running your eyes all over his pretty features and suddenly, in that short span of 20 seconds, you had memorised where every single mole on his face was. 

Seokmin and Seungkwan held your arms on either side half hiding behind you which was stupid considering you were the biggest coward in the room. 

But somehow, as the man before you looked at all of you with narrowed, accusing eyes and tried to stand up, you swung your arm and smacked him right on the head with the torch again. All three boys gawked at you as the man fell back into the chair again, head rolling to the side, unconscious. 

“What the hell mate-”

“I'm sorry I panicked!”

“Will someone tell me what's happening? Why is he wearing my clothes-”

“Shut up Soonyoung.” Seungkwan turned to you looking terrified. “Do you have any idea what you've done?” 

“Hey, this can't be just on me, we all thought it was Soonyoung-” 

“Me???” 

“-how is this my only fault-” 

“Because!” Seungkwan raised his voice pointing a shaking finger. “The man you just knocked out again, that's…that's….”

“That's…” Seokmin's eyes widened in realisation. “That's the city’s most wanted criminal, Yoon Jeonghan.” 

A/n -I have tagged all those on the current taglist in the comments, if you wanna be added to the taglist for the fic or for the series, please let me know by leaving a comment/sending an ask or a message!

[i-am-creacheur]

making one of these because the world sucks and I need outside motivation to get better. I'm not popular enough to get any traction but I need help so I guess spamming welcome.

1 note: I start my Latin game project which is due like three days from now- complete!!!!

5 notes: I will text my crush along the lines of "hey we have a lot of teams and clubs in common but I don't anything about you. What are somethings you like" except less creepy- working up the courage.

10 notes: I will try to write more on my fics.- busy atm but will work on them when I can

20 notes: I will ask my parents for a birthday cake, because my birthday was two weeks ago and we were out of the country so I didn't really get anything (they said the trip was my gift but I think it was a joke) and I always get the same cake and my internal calender is now screaming in agony- they bought a lot of sweet stuff i like earlier today so I'm considering not asking. Or just asking for a cupcake with buttercream icing or sm

30 notes: do so much laundry- doing a load of shirts and stuff atm

40 notes: try to get better at taking care of myself (eating breakfast, showering more often, drinking more water)- put a water bottle on my desk and am working on this

50 notes: organize my mcyt folder in my photo gallery (has over 3k pictures)- I'll do this while procrastinating later today

100 notes: properly clean my room- laundry is a major part of this but yall swarmed the notes so it will take me a bit to reach. I mean I did say spamming was fine so I dug my own grave

200 notes: buy magnets from a fandom I really like

300 notes: buy more jeans. I only like certain kinds of pants and I haven't gotten new ones in like two years so I really need some that haven't been beaten to hell

500 notes: ask my parents for an adhd coach

700 notes: start properly planning my eagle project

1k notes: ask my crush out/tell my parents I think I like girls

2k: make three cosplays of my favorite characters

3k: start researching colleges (this is very stressful to think about for me hence why it is so high up)

Likely to add more 👍

[cowboyellies]

- Bad Habit | e.w.

were you not not too good for me, my dear?

funny you comeback to me my dear

PART TWO OF "You're Not Good enough"

pairing: college player!ellie x fem college!reader

warnings/themes: angst!!!, ellie is v emotionally unavailable (my type <3), she's a teensy bit manipulative, reader mentions past toxic relationship, slight mention of ellie's past trauma, lots of jealousy, small amount of abby x reader (sorry abby), reader is kind of stupid (just like me fr), slight mentions of violence, small amount of smut (just a heavy make out)

word count: 3.8k

synopsis: you finally end things with ellie and months later you couldn't feel any better. ellie on the other hand is losing her mind without you. when she sees you at a club one night on a date with another girl, she's determined to get you back no matter what cost.

a/n: I didn't originally plan on making a part two but a few people asked so here it is! I hope you enjoy (below I'm tagging everyone who asked for a part 2)

 🏷 🏷 🏷: @shortcake22341 @harrysslutsstuff @robinismywifee @gizzzi

you and ellie hooked up three more times before you finally called it quits. for real this time. seriously. you blocked her on all platforms and even started avoiding spaces you knew you would see her at. 

the final straw this time for you was the fact that the third time you were hooking up she got a text from another girl during, and she answered it. once she finished sending her text back she rolled over to resume eating you out but you were already grabbing your shit and bolting for the door. that wasn’t the first time ellie williams had humiliated you but you made a promise to yourself that it would be the last. 

now it was two months later, the longest you’d gone without seeing her in about a year. you no longer thought of her, for the most part. there were times where you longed to unblock her number and go crawling back. but you didn’t. you finally felt actually single for the first time in forever and it was exhilarating. you now could do whatever you wanted, hook up with whoever you wanted without feeling the weird guilt and shame ellie left you with every time you’d walk out of her apartment. and now that your spring term had ended you were most certainly using this freedom to your advantage. 

ellie on the other hand was losing her shit. the night she fucked up again was actually a misunderstanding this time. yes, she did receive a text to hook up while you were fucking each other. and yes she did answer it. but it was only to tell the girl to fuck off. she tried to explain that to you but you had already slammed the door in her face before she could get the words out. 

she had tried everything she could think of how to get you to talk to her, even stooping so low as to show up at your door, begging for you to open up. this actually might have worked on you if she hadn’t gotten your apartment number wrong. you two spent most of your time together at her place so she ended up scaring the living shit out of your elderly neighbor mrs. flenderson when she showed up knocking on her door at one a.m. drunk.

now all she could do was sit alone with her feelings which she hated. she hated knowing she cared about you and all this time apart was just giving her more time to think about it, so much so she even began fantasizing how she would confess her feelings for you. she drafted long speeches in her head for different ways she’d make you hear her out. 

when the opportunity to actually confess arrives, things don’t go as smoothly as they do in her imagined scenarios. 

the night you two finally see each other again you happen to be on a second date. the first second date you’ve been on since you started seeing people again. you had become accustomed to your one night stands but something about this girl drew you in. abby and you had met through a mutual friend and you actually got along really well. she’s funny, kind, doesn’t seem to share the same emotional incapabilities as your exes, and she’s pretty fucking hot. 

your night starts out amazing, she brings you to a club where she happens to know the owner, getting you past the entrance right away and straight to the bar, where she showers you in free drinks and many, many compliments. you flirt and laugh and blush like you haven’t in a while and you realize what you really want to do is dance. as you’re on your way to the floor, that's when you see her.

ellie’s at the entrance of the club with her two friends you vaguely know, dina and jesse. you stare at her for a few moments, taking in the features you had tried so desperately to brush from your memory. her auburn hair is shorter and you can tell from the rolled up sleeves of her black button up that she got more detailing done on her tattoo. her head starts to turn towards your direction so you suddenly switch positions with abby, moving so if ellie looks your way she’d only see your back. 

“is everything okay?” abby asks, leaning down towards your ear so you could hear her over the loud music. you nod and try to continue dancing as if nothing is bothering you, which is hard to do considering that you suddenly feel the urge to vomit. abby doesn’t seem convinced so she pulls you off to the side of the dance floor, luckily away from where ellie had gone to sit with her friends. “are you sure you’re alright, you look a little green,”

“yeah I’m fine!!” you insist, trying not to give ellie the power to ruin your night like you’d done many times before. “I think I’m just a little lightheaded,” you say, hoping it’ll make her drop it.

“oh shit, let's go to the bar and get you some water,” she replies, frowning in concern, grabbing your hand to lead you back there.

“no!” you suddenly shout, knowing that’s where ellie’s sitting. “no um- I just really like this part of the club! do you think you could just bring some for me over here?” you ask, even though the “area of the club” you’re referencing is just a dark corner near the bathroom next to a trashcan. 

abby looks at you questionably but eventually turns and does what you ask, probably figuring you definitely need it now. once she’s gone you start plotting how you can make your escape from here without ellie seeing, hopefully not further ruining your date. you know you’re being immature and that grown ups don’t hide in corners from their exes, but you’re pretty tipsy and you never claimed to be a grown up. 

a minute after abby leaves you see dina and jesse make their way to the dance floor. before you can even think to conceal yourself, dina makes eye contact with you and you notice her eyes widen in recognition, which makes you realize ellie had definitely told her something about your breakup. while that made you go into further panic it also made you pause. when you first met dina it was when you and ellie had run into her at a coffee shop the morning after one of your sleepovers. ellie had introduced you to her as “a friend” even though you’d been hooking up for four months at that point. if ellie had gone from that to now confiding in dina about your messy break, it made you think about how much your split had actually affected her. 

as you see dina move to go and tell ellie about you lurking in the shadows, abby starts to walk back in your direction, glass of water in hand. now you’re screwed. there’s no way you can convince abby to leave before ellie comes to find you.

while you’re being overcome with sudden doom, ellie from the other side of the room feels her heartbeat pick up in a way it hasn’t in months. as soon as dina had muttered your name she jolted out of her seat. now as she makes her way over to you, confident to win you back, she notices something dina hadn’t mentioned, her.

abby stands next to you brushing a hair behind your ear, gently stroking your shoulder as you down the glass of water she brought you. ellie feels a sudden rage flow through her whole body. just when she thinks she’s getting you back she sees you with another girl. this is different than with the couch girl from the party who was just gonna be a random fuck, she can tell from your body language you’re already getting comfortable with her beyond that. she stops suddenly a few feet in front of you, causing you to choke a little on your water. 

as you’re now standing face to face with ellie you notice that familiar jealousy plastered all over her face. as much as you know you have nothing to be guilty about, you can’t help but start to sweat a little as she resembles the look of a rageful girlfriend. you realize that’s exactly what abby might think she is as you look up to see her shocked expression. just as you’re about to explain, ellie beats you to it. 

“can I talk to you?” she asks, more of a command than an actual question. 

“no!” you shout back over the music, hoping that will send her away but knowing from past experience it won’t. 

“who is thi-” abby starts before she’s cut off 

“I’m ellie. who the fuck are you?” she yells, turning her direct attention to abby for the first time.

“her date, who the fuck are you? are you two-”

“NO!” you yell, wishing you had opted for the dinner and a movie date you previously discussed. “let’s just go!” you yell, at this point you weren’t even focused on salvaging your date but instead on getting the fuck out of there. 

“I need to fucking talk to you please,” ellie begs stepping in front of you, this is different than the last time at the party, you’ve never heard her voice sound so desperate. 

“she said no, back the fuck up,” abby shouts, pushing ellie a little on her shoulder. before you can say anything, that small little push turns into ellie flinging her fist into abby’s jaw. you knew she had a temper but have never seen her actually fight someone until now. the two of them begin full on fighting and instead of doing the honorable thing and trying to pull them off of each other, you simply leave. you know doing this pretty much guarantees no third date with abby but you can’t really find it in yourself to care. you’re so over with this night and the constant shit show that is your love life so you find yourself just exiting the club. 

they don’t notice you’re gone until a few minutes after, around the same time the security begins showing up to pull the two of them apart. before they can restrain ellie she makes a break for it, bolting after you towards the door. 

she finds you a few blocks away sitting on the curb waiting for an uber. you notice her shadow looming over you and you turn your head up to face her, groaning once you see her bruised face.

“ellie you’ve done enough, can you just please leave me alone,” you plead, the weight of the night’s events finally starting to hit you, making you feel exhausted.

“i’m sorry, I can’t,” she replies, lowering her body to the curb next to you. you look at her confused for a few moments, realizing that’s the first time you’ve ever heard her use the words “I’m sorry”

“why?” your voice cracks and your eyes starting to brim with tears on impulse. you aren’t sure exactly why you’re crying but it’s making you feel small and stupid. 

“you know why,” she replies, unable to give anymore. after all this time she spent building speeches, she still found herself scared to say the actual words.

“no, I don’t ellie. I have no idea why you treat me like this,” you reply, the tears beginning to spill on your cheeks. “I don’t know why you act as if you don’t give a shit about me but still can’t let me go, you never fucking tell me why,”

her heart is racing now. she knows if she doesn’t say the right thing she’ll lose you for real. this is the last moment she can avoid her feelings or she’ll crush yours once and for all. 

“It’s because I-” she starts at barely a whisper, her eyes beginning to water. “its because I fucking care about you!” now she’s almost yelling, the words escaping her mouth like a sob. “and I haven’t felt this way in a long time and it fucking terrifies me,” you look down at her hands and notice they’re shaking. you want so badly to hold her but a part of you stays restrained, knowing after everything she’s put you through you can’t just grant her forgiveness that easily.

“you don’t think I’m terrified too? ellie it took me a long time to get over my ex and you know that. but I didn’t dump you on your fucking ass the second I started to get feelings for you. and I certainly didn’t text another girl in the middle of us fucking!” the memory of that night starts to overcome your sympathy for her, replacing it with anger instead

“I texted her back to tell her not to message me again, and I tried to explain that to you and you wouldn’t let me. I know i fucked up and had shitty timing but you have to believe that I would never hurt you like that,” she was fully pleading now. you had never seen her so much as shed a tear and now here she is baring her soul. 

“ellie, you know I want to trust that but why should I? you’ve done nothing but give me reasons to believe otherwise,” you’re sobbing now too, your face turned towards the pavement in front of you watching your tears drip on the floor. you feel her fingers gently pull your chin upwards to look at her again, you notice a complete sense of somberness in her eyes now, this could possibly be the last thing she’d ever say to you.

“I know you don’t have any reason to believe me but you have to know that I…” she pauses for a moment to collect herself. the three words on the tip of her tongue were something she hadn’t said out loud in over five years. “I love you. okay? and I know I have a shitty way of showing it but I do,” 

out of everything she could have said to you that was the last thing you were expecting. you had known for a while that ellie had rejected that feeling because of something that had happened in her childhood which she never could fully tell you about, and you weren’t sure if she was even capable of it anymore. it’s at that moment where you know for certain she’s not just saying all this to get you in her bed. 

you’re truly looking at her now, the two of you facing each other with tearfilled eyes not able to say anything. this is when ellie finally breaks out the material in her fantasy speeches. “I love how you look when you’re sleeping, you get this cute half smile on your face when you’re having a good dream. and I love how obsessed you are with pickles, even though you refuse to eat a cucumber which I have explained to you many times is what pickles are made out of-”

“they’re not the same and you know it,” you interrupt through your tears. you had always wanted a big love confession like the one she was giving you, filled with specific facts and details, you said so while watching when harry met sally after one of your first hookups, you were shocked she remembered.

“I love how you never let me finish my sentences,” she replies with a smirk, her cockiness beginning to return after the intense few minutes of vulnerability. “I love how you do that thing with your lips when you’re cum-”

“okay you’re done now,” you stop her, a blush beginning to take over your face. you were starting to forget that at the beginning of the night you hated her guts and were likely going home with another woman.

“are you sure? I have a lot more,” she teases, you know the rest are all sexual. you realize after a moment of silence you never told her you love her back, and you realize you aren’t sure if you even do. obviously you still have strong feelings for her, otherwise you’d have already stormed away from her by now. 

as you’re about to say something to break the silence the uber you’d ordered earlier appears in front of you. you look up at her and contemplate what it’ll mean to invite her in with you. is it still stupid to fuck her after one night of seeing her again? does the fact that she loves you make a difference in that? 

you aren’t really sure and you don’t care. you pull her yourself up from the curb, dragging her along with you towards the backseat of the car.

–

after a tense fifteen minute uber ride which consisted of the two of you trying your absolute best to keep your hands to yourself and spare the sweet little old man driver, you finally arrive at your apartment. you’re now the one dragging her towards the elevator, recreating the same passionate makeout against the metal walls as the time after she cornered you at the party. the only difference being the fact that now you were no longer shoving down feelings of regret and shame. 

after you exit the elevator and you’re opening your apartment door you hear her laugh at the unit behind you, mrs. flenderson’s apartment. 

“oh my god ellie, stop,” you whisper shout at her, remembering the fear in the little old lady's voice as she told you about ellie’s drunken escapade. “she has heart problems, you could have killed her!” 

you feel her arms reach over your sides, gently resting on your stomach as she begins to lean into your neck “are you jealous thinking about me confessing my feelings for another woman?” she teases, the embrace making it harder for you to open your door.

“no ellie, the thought of you trying to seduce my 78 year old neighbor does not make me jealous,” you reply with an eye roll, finally managing to open the lock. as soon as the two of you are inside she’s pushing you up against the door, her lips trailing all over your body, desperate to show you how much she meant what she said earlier. 

“you have no idea-” she says in between kisses. “how hard it was-” she’s gripping gently at your hair now, her eyes traveling up and down your body, taking you in fully for the first time in months. “to see you dancing like that with someone else,” you think about what she’s saying for a moment, the memory of abby making you trail your fingers down a bruise she had left on ellie’s cheekbone. you realize then that you could find it in yourself to forgive ellie for using you, because that’s exactly what you inadvertently had done to abby.

you pull her towards you by the jaw, her ear just centimeters away from your lips as you whisper “good.” you figured if you had accidentally used someone to make her jealous there's no harm in using that to your advantage now. you see ellie’s jaw tighten a little and her lips are back on yours in seconds, this time harsher than before.

you make your way to your bedroom, her hands on you the entire time as you’re leading her there. when you reach the bottom of your bed you begin to sit but you feel her pull you up, her hungry hands clinging to the fabric of your dress around your thighs. 

“look at this pretty little dress,” she mumbles while running her hands up towards your breasts, the skin tight fabric clinging to you in all the right places. “you got all dressed up just for her,”

you roll your eyes at her jealousy but deep down the pool of heat in your core was growing stronger. she responds to your eye roll by yanking the dress down your arms. she then makes her way to the clasps on your bra, unhooking it and throwing it to your floor. she begins kissing you again, starting at your neck and trailing down towards your breasts, a moan escaping you as her mouth met your nipples. instinctively your hand grasp onto her hair, clinging to the roots as she laps at your skin. your grip on her hair tightens as your pleasure increases when she stops suddenly.  “could abby’s tongue make you feel that good baby?”

you’re about to reply when she breaks away from your skin, now firmly pushing you towards your mattress. as you lie back she begins to take off your dress completely, staring down at you cravingly. unable to stand the lack of her lips on you, you’re suddenly sitting up and pulling her down towards you, gripping at the fabric of her shirt as her lips are crashing down on yours. 

“somebody’s eager,” she teases, smiling in between kisses. as you’re making out you begin to feel her remove your hands from her neck and pinning them to the bed above you. you lean up towards her to continue your kissing when she pulls back, the sudden lack of contact causing you to let out a small pathetic whimper. she laughs at you and begins to take you in. her eyes linger over your mussed hair and pink lips that are wet from her kisses. “you’re so fucking beautiful,”

this comment catches you off guard. ellie had never said anything like that to you before. yes, she complimented frequently while you were together calling hot and gorgeous especially when you were on top of her, but this was different. this was more intimate. you smile brightly beneath her and use all your strength to lift yourself by your elbows to deliver one frenzied kiss onto her lips, plopping your head back down on the bed afterwards.

you realize then that the hot jealousy filled sex you two were headed towards had begun to change. all thoughts of abby, of any of your collective exes, or anyone else in the world for that matter have disappeared. this is about you and her. 

she resumes kissing you, this time gentler, and you think back to the last time you had slept together. after your breakup every time you fucked was more feverish than the last. that sex was a dirty little mistake you couldn’t stop making, and you made sure to make it as quick and emotionless as possible. now as she’s on top of you, slowly stroking your hair as she moves her lips across your neck you are overcome with a sense of closeness for her that you had been trying to repress since the night she broke your heart on her dingy old couch. 

“ellie,” you whisper, her mouth slowly detaching from your skin as she adjusts herself to look at you. 

“yeah?” she asks, moving a chunk of hair near your face behind your ear. 

“I love you too”

[neptuneiris]

sparks (01/04)

My heart is yours It's you that I hold on to

pairing: business-boyfriend!aemond x fem!reader

summary: at the beginning your relationship with aemond is perfect and there were no worries. until he becomes the Heir of his father's company, the most important in the whole country and certain events and certain people start to interfere in the relationship.

word count: 8.6k

next part • series masterlist

AHHH here is another story!

I'm really excited for this one especially since it's angst but in a modern world, which I haven't done since cardigan and gosh what I have prepared for this, you're going to like it a lot or that's what I hope haha.

I look forward to your comments excited, I love responding to each one of them, thank you for your support and for reading, you are amazing beautiful people, enjoy!

warnings: pure angst

You're losing him.

You say to yourself as you read the messages from your boyfriend, Aemond.

You stare emotionlessly at your phone screen for a few more moments as you bite the inside of your cheek, beginning to feel a sharp pain in your chest and disappointment coursing through your body.

With a defeated gesture, you turn off the screen and head to your room, starting to take off your makeup, hairstyle and also the beautiful black dress that you were so excited for Aemond to see you wearing.

You resist the urge to cry at all times, especially when you remove your makeup and look at yourself in the mirror, biting your lips and telling yourself that this is no big deal, that you shouldn't cry.

You know it's not his fault, you know he has work and that keeps him very busy, but it's not the first time this has happened.

Days before he proposes the idea of going to dinner, just you and him, to one of those fine restaurants downtown, telling you he wants to enjoy a luxurious dinner with you, making you get excited and start planning what you will wear and how you will do your makeup and hair.

And when the day comes… his work prevents him from leaving the company building and consumes more of his time.

You understand the great responsibility he carries on his back being the heir to his father's important company, preparing at twenty-three years old to become the next big head and boss by the time comes, but you never thought you would have to spend less time with him every day.

Aemond a year ago graduated with a degree in business management and as soon as he received his college degree, he started working with his father.

You met him because you both have friends in common at the same university even though you study marketing and are a year younger, yet your friends would ask you out to clubs or for drinks and Aemond would join in.

That's when the two of you started talking and getting to know each other better. And as a result of that, eventually he and you started hanging out together until you formalized everything by being in a relationship.

Not too long after that, the two of you decided to live together in an apartment near the university, which you could afford because Aemond has always belonged to a rich family and also because of your half-time job at a coffee shop.

But when Aemond graduated and started working with his father, the whole relationship slowly began to change.

You only talk when he comes home late, asking you how was your day, what did you do and you also ask the same to him, realizing that there is no day where Aemond does not go through stress.

Now you see him less time, in the evening he comes back and you don't even talk much as he feels exhausted, so he takes a shower and goes to sleep.

There are no more times where you go out to the movies, to a fast food restaurant, bowling, for drinks with friends, not even watching movies at home or eating together, be it breakfast, lunch, dinner, nothing.

Even in his days off, he is working in his home office, taking calls and so on, while you miraculously wait for him to have a little break and talk to you, but again... nothing.

That's why right now you don't want to get angry with him, because you know it's not his fault, but still... you can't resist it anymore and the first tears fall down your cheeks and low sobs escape from your throat.

You want to reassure yourself, thinking that you shouldn't cry over this, that it's not that big of a deal, but you can't stop, the tears keep coming and your sobs are the only thing that can be heard all over the room, crying louder at the thought of how much you miss him.

You continue to remove everything from your face in tears, even the hairstyle that took you hours, and then you calm down and put on your sleeping clothes.

You leave your beautiful dress on your comfortable sofa next to the window, deciding to put it properly back in your closet tomorrow, not having any more courage for this day, wanting to lie down on your bed, sleep and nothing else.

You feel sleep take you and you sink into deep darkness, resting. Then you don't know exactly how much time has passed, but a sound makes you slowly open your eyes.

You hear him start to walk softly around the room, trying not to make too much noise, feeling his gaze on you for a few moments.

You hear perfectly the sound of the door to the room and then footsteps entering.

"Love? Are you asleep?"

You hear him ask you in his low but audible and attentive enough tone, but you don't say or do anything to him.

Aemond lets out a long breath as he sees that you are asleep, feeling very tired and just as disappointed as you are, to start taking off his clothes and heading to take a shower.

You continue to lie still, turning your back to him, still pretending to sleep when you know you shouldn't but... you don't want to talk to him about what happened tonight, you don't feel in the mood.

You're tired, disappointed and don't want to get upset with him when it's not his fault, but you won't be able to help it.

And when he returns to the room already with his sleeping clothes on, about to lie down next to you, he briefly inspects the room and feels a pain in his chest when he sees two of your makeup removal towels on your vanity full of it, causing him pity.

It doesn't really take him long even though all the time he thinks about you and how disappointed you must have been, also how sad you must have felt.

But you never bother with him and that's what makes him more frustrated as he fails you once again because you understand him, you always do.

Also when he sees the black dress on the couch, he feels terrible.

Finally he turns his attention to you in bed, turning off the bathroom light and lying down next to you, instantly hugging you gently from behind so as not to wake you up and leaves a soft, tender kiss on your shoulder and others in your hair.

You still continue to pretend, enjoying his touch for a moment, but you again hold back the urge to cry all the time, feeling so good but not enough, as before.

Then Aemond drops his head on the pillow, covers himself with the sheets and finally he is carried away by the sleep, still hugging you.

You bite the inside of your cheek throughout, trying to control yourself so as not to get his attention when you've been doing so well and you close your eyes, wanting to go back to sleep

Yet there in the dark, in the place of you and Aemond, with his arm around you and holding you against him, feeling his soft breath at the base of your neck, you can't help but wonder: what if he's losing me?

You let out a long breath as you finally dare to walk through the huge doors of the big and tall building where Aemond works.

You have been here many times before, this is nothing new to you, however you feel anxious and a bit nervous as you have decided to come here without telling him before.

So you don't know if he is busy in the middle of a meeting or if he is in his office with a pile of papers around.

You are allowed free passage as most of the people here know you for being his girlfriend, so you don't really have any problems and say hello to all the receptionists, secretaries and security guards.

You have decided to come here to bring him his coffee of choice and also food, knowing that his break time starts in exactly ten minutes.

The thing is that he seems to be still working after all so you don't know what he must be doing now.

Once the elevator drops you on the floor where his office is, you instantly greet Eleonor, his assistant.

"It's been a while since I've seen you last, Y/N!"

She says with a loving smile, hugging you tightly and you smile hugging her back, taking care not to let the food and coffee fall out of your hands.

"Oh yeah, I'll tell you," she says pointing to all the paperwork on her desk with an exhausted look, "That man doesn't rest and you should put a limit on him," she says seriously.

"Yeah, I know," you both pull apart and you look at her without wiping your smile, "I've been really busy with college and also Aemond lately has had a lot of work so.... each one is on his own."

"You know how stubborn he is," you tell her as you shake your head in disappointment, "But anyway, I came to bring him food, is he in his office?" you point to his door.

"Oh no, he went to his father's office for some papers, but he should be on his way back by no—

The sound of the elevator makes you both turn your gazes to it, interrupting Eleonor and when the doors open Aemond appears, quickly walking out of there with his gaze fixed on the screen of his phone while in his other hand he holds a folder.

"There he is," Eleonor tells you with a small smile.

You smile back at her and turn your attention to Aemond, who looks so handsome in his office suits, so masculine and powerful, drawing everyone's attention everywhere he goes, adding to that his beautiful long silver hair.

But not only that, his sapphire eye also attracts attention.

He lost his eye in an accident as a child, however, by filling his empty socket with that precious stone, he feels even more powerful, signifying respect and endurance to him, also a form of intimidation as he will become the boss one day.

He also has a prosthetic eye, but that one he wears more when he is with his family or also when he was going to college, although already being at home, he doesn't wear anything.

You see the frustration all over his face at whatever he must be looking at on his phone screen, but when he looks up, everything softens the moment he sees you, a small smile appears on his lips, but also the slight confusion, speeding up his pace towards you a little more.

"Hey baby."

"Hi," you smile softly at him, closing the distance between the two of you.

"What are you doing here?"

He asks you without wiping away his small smile, reaching towards you and instantly leaning down to leave a soft kiss on your lips which you reciprocate, smiling.

"I came to bring you your black coffee and food too," you point to everything in your hands, proudly.

"But don't you have classes?" he asks you confused, watching everything and also you, attentive.

"In two hours"

"Oh thank you, my sweet girl," he leaves another soft kiss on your lips, taking the coffee first as he sets the papers down on Eleonor's desk to take a sip, "Uff, I needed that."

"Yeah," you let out a small laugh, "It's your lunch hour, isn't it?"

"It's supposed to be," he tells you as the frustration returns to his face and so does his bad mood, "I have an important meeting in five minutes, I just got word," he points to the boardroom with his gaze, taking another sip of his coffee.

"Oh," disappointment again washes over you, as you had hoped this wouldn't happen, "I was hoping to spend some time with you," you tell him trying not to sound as sad as you really are.

And he lets out a long breath, turning his expression of pity and concern.

"I know love," he tells you as he rests his forehead with yours, looking at you sadly and as if asking for forgiveness, "You know if I could do anything—

"No, no, I know, it's okay babe," you assure him, interrupting him, "Then I won't stop you anymore if you have to work."

You smile softly at him, though it doesn't quite reach your eyes and then take the topper where his food is, as Aemond watches you intently and even sadly.

"I'll leave this in your office until you can eat, then I'll leave."

"Wait," he stops you in a soft voice, pulling you back towards him as he takes your arm, "Y/N, about last night—

"Mr. Targaryen!"

Suddenly a female voice interrupts him and also the moment, making you both focus behind him, where a tall woman with long black hair, red dress and black high heels approaches with a rather elegant and calculated way of walking, with a huge smile on her lips.

Aemond watches you back and stands next to you as he intertwines his fingers with yours and clears his throat, turning back to watch her.

"Miss Rivers," he nods politely towards her.

"It is a pleasure to see you on this day, Mr. Targaryen," she nods her head towards him as well, placing herself in front of you both.

"It is also a pleasure."

You watch Aemond for a second and then turn your gaze to her, watching as she also watches you at about the same time and that's when he reacts.

"Love, this is Alys Rivers, co-owner of the Riverlands company," he tells you and points to you with his hand, "And Miss Rivers, this is Y/N Y/L/N, my girlfriend."

You usually meet a lot of people who are also involved in all this business management stuff because of Aemond, especially when he takes you with him to important events and dinners as his companion, so this isn't new either.

What is new is this woman... Alys Rivers.

Normally she would have been just another woman who owns a company and is doing business with Aemond for her father's company, but the way she subtly inspects you up and down, and you notice the way she looks at your joined hand with Aemond.... you don't like it.

She looks at you superiorly and as if you're no big deal, almost expectantly, her bright smile from before disappearing for a second, but then she holds out her hand to you.

"Oh sure, it is a pleasure to meet you," she says to you with the brighter smile from before, but completely fake.

You bite the inside of your cheek and since you shouldn't be rude, much less to what you think is Aemond's new partner and company, you take her hand and shake it briefly.

"A pleasure," you nod in her direction.

"We're discussing a contract," Aemond then tells you, leaning his body toward you.

"Oh really? That sounds—

"Actually, speaking of discussions," she interrupts you, catching both of your attention, "I'm sorry but could I steal your boyfriend for a moment?"

She asks you suddenly, her tone too high and mellow, completely fake, without erasing her smile, revealing her perfect, aligned teeth.

"I really don't mean to intrude," she says with a sorrow look, but you don't believe her at all, "It's just that I'm afraid your grandfather and also my uncle are already expecting us Mr. Targaryen," she turns to Aemond to focus on you again, "I'm sure you'll understand, business stuff."

Of course you understand, you know Aemond's job perfectly well and in fact you wouldn't have taken any more notice of this woman despite the fake way she acts towards you and also because of the way she looked at you before.

But... you care very much the moment she places her hand on Aemond's shoulder, exposing her perfect red painted nails.

"Shall we?" she asks him as she watches him with a certain gleam in her eyes and gaze, completely attentive and in his disposition.

Of course Aemond notices this too, who almost instantly watches as she touches him, not understanding what has happened to her to casually make such a gesture or rather what has she thought to take such a liberty, then subtly walking away from her, trying not to look annoyed.

"I'll be there in a moment," he tells her just as polite and serious as before.

But she is insistent.

"I'm sorry Mr. Targaryen but we must leave now."

"Don't worry, I'm sure my grandfather can speak in my absence."

The smile fades from her lips, but you see how she quickly pulls herself together, although you've had enough of this and you don't want to delay Aemond any longer even though you don't like this woman at all, but at least they won't be alone and there are more people involved in the meeting.

And before she speaks, you do, addressing him.

"Don't worry love, I'll be on my way," you smile at him, "I don't want to delay you any longer. But I'll see you tonight, okay?"

And this immediately gets his attention.

"Do you need someone to drive you? I can tell Cole."

"No, no need, it's fine," you assure him, "You eat this, okay?"

You point to the food then extend it to Eleonor, as he smiles softly.

"Okay."

"Have a good day, love you."

"You too, love you."

You leave a soft kiss on his lips and finally head to the elevator, feeling the piercing gaze of Alys Rivers, but you don't mind, since at least you weren't the fake one the whole time.

After you leave the building and head to the university, your day goes by slow, stressful and with a lot to do, until finally your class ends at almost nine o'clock at night and you head home completely exhausted.

Normally Aemond comes home at ten o'clock at night, however, you don't know why you were hoping that maybe he had come home earlier, however, when you get to the apartment everything is dark.

You let out a long breath and turn on the lights, wishing and hoping that Aemond was already here and that just for one night, he would be the one to welcome you home.

You've thought about bringing up the subject of how you should spend more time with him, how he could maybe organize his work schedule better, how you've been feeling lately and how you misses him, telling him that nothing feels like it used to.

So the days and weeks go by, nothing has changed, you are still working half days, you are still going to classes, doing projects, research and so on.

While Aemond is still working very hard at the company, both of you seeing each other until late at night when he finishes another long and stressful day at work.

However, the words get stuck in your throat as you see him coming home from work very tired, deciding it's best to let him rest and sleep.

But more and more you feel the disappointment and sadness envelop you, having to deal with it yourself because you don't want to upset him.

Then one day, everything starts to go wrong.

In the middle of your Sales and Negotiation class, suddenly your phone vibrates and while listening attentively to your professor, you briefly glance at the screen for a second, seeing that it's a message from Floris, a friend you and Aemond have in common.

She apparently sends you a link to a magazine article that you can't really read unless you open the chat, and then you see two more messages from her.

[Floris B]: you saw this??

[Floris B]: ????

This definitely gets your attention, but before you can do anything, your professor draws more attention from everyone in the class and you go back to being attentive, hoping none of it was a bad thing.

However, an hour after class ends, you finally leave the classroom and start walking down the hallway in the direction of your next class with your phone in hand, opening the curious magazine link and what pops up... it's definitely bad.

With your thumb you read more of the whole news, where yes there are pictures of Aemond with that woman in a restaurant, just the two of them, him in his office clothes and her in an elegant dress.

You feel your breathing getting heavier as you see more pictures, where there is one in particular where you see how she has her hand on top of his, they are both obviously talking but there are also papers and folders on the table.

Again you feel that sharp pain in your chest, not wanting to jump to conclusions so fast, you trust Aemond with your life but clearly you don't trust her.

What you don't understand is why they went to a restaurant together. If they have talked business, which in fact there is no other reason why the two of them would be together, why not take care of it at the office?

You enter Safari and as you google Aemond, you see the same magazine article everywhere, instantly more magazines and newspapers advertising the same thing, all about a possible relationship between him and Alys Rivers.

You let out a long breath and finally head to your class, trying not to think about it anymore, but as the minutes tick by... you can't.

In all your remaining classes you find it hard to concentrate, you feel an uncertainty and anxiety all the time, you feel really bad and you have no idea what will happen when Aemond and you see each other tonight.

Not only Floris messages you, but also other friends that you and Aemond have in common, but you don't respond to them, only making you feel more anxious that the news is spreading fast.

Until finally you can go home and having no other choice, you wait for Aemond to arrive.

You pour yourself a glass of wine, unable to help it and wait for Aemond at the kitchen island, drinking and having the hope that this, that woman, is no threat and that what happened just happened inside the business and will not happen anymore.

Or at least it won't happen anymore in the sense that Aemond won't show up with her publicly anymore to avoid the press making speculations like this, that whether you want it to or not, they affect you and a lot.

You really don't know what is going on with Aemond in the company, you don't know what he talks about with his grandfather, his father, his mother and this woman, you don't know about his negotiations, his work and that's why it affects you, because you don't know what is happening.

Everything would be simpler if he and you had the time to talk, to share what you do, what you should do, as before.

However... you have the suspicion that this is not only in Aemond's hands, but that it is something beyond, something this woman is in control of and you don't like it at all, not since you met her and she gave you a bad feeling.

And you finally let out all the air you're holding in when you hear the sound of the door.

You continue sitting still on the stool, with the glass of wine in your hands, waiting. When again you hear the sound of the door closing and the figure of Aemond appearing, instantly he sees you.

He lets out a long breath as it finally becomes clear to him that you saw the news, he knew it before when he too saw the article in his office and officially started his stressful and frustrating day, but he didn't think it would affect you so much.

He leaves his keys on the island and then takes off his jacket with a silence enveloping you both, where he watches you attentively but you don't look back at him, still deep in thought, taking another sip of your wine.

He sees your dull look, the anxiety all over your body, the uncertainty, the sadness, the stress and he bets that your treacherous thoughts are making you believe things that are not.

He also notices how bad you must feel and how tense and distant you are from him now, and that worries him more than anything else.

"Nothing happened between me and this woman, Y/N."

Then he decides to speak, not bearing this anymore, your silence, your attitude, your distance. He just wants to hold you, hug you and kiss you, which is all he wants every time he finishes another horrible day at work.

He tells you tactfully, his voice soft and honest, firm with what he's saying, taking a couple of steps toward you, to which you continue without looking at him.

"I just want to know why you went to that restaurant together," you tell him in your voice just as soft as his, almost even sounding tired.

And he knows you too well, however, because this news is practically everywhere, being the first time you both face something like this, you remain calm and willing to talk.

And this strangely confuses and surprises him.

Although it shouldn't since he knows that you never get angry with him, at least not in this kind of situations since from the beginning of the relationship, communication has always been paramount before jumping to your own conclusions, avoiding fights.

And this gives him a bit of confidence to move closer to you.

"I just thought it would be better to take care of some business in public," he tells you honestly, "I know you didn't like her when you met her, neither did I. I also know she started to cross physical boundaries and I didn't like the idea of being with her alone in my office, that's why I decided on a public place out of respect for you," he explains, "I should have known this would happen though," he says bitterly,

Nothing.

You say nothing. You just listen and think.

You still don't like that he's having encounters with this woman, but if he has to do it for company business, you're not going to have an argument with him when it's just work.

And your silence begins to unsettle and frustrate him.

"You believe me, don't you?" he asks you insistently, concerned.

"Of course I do," you tell him in a murmur, without much emotion, though honestly, watching him out of the corner of your eye.

You almost snort in disbelief, of course you believe him.

Only you know when Aemond is being honest or not and you are relieved that he is always thinking of you, but he is not the problem, it's his job and this woman, that's what doesn't leave you alone.

But Aemond doesn't feel reassured just hearing that from you.

You take the last sip of your wine glass and get up from the stool to head to the dishwasher, saying nothing more, then start heading for the bedroom, causing Aemond to become more concerned and insistent.

"Where are you going?"

"I want to sleep."

He lets out a sigh as he averts his gaze for a second.

"Come on Y/N, don't be like that," he looks at you sadly.

"I'm not doing anything," you tell him, walking past him.

"You haven't even looked me in the eye since I arrived," he insists, stopping you.

"Aemond..." you finally give him a look, "I'm tired."

"Me too but I want to fix this," he says immediately.

"No, I'm tired... of everything," you clarify, serious and also sad.

He looks at you without understanding.

"What do you mean? I already explained to you—

"No, it's not just her, it's... your work and us."

You say more specifically, causing more confusion from Aemond, who watches you with furrowed brows and parted lips, attentive.

"I've wished for just one, one day where we can spend time together," you confess to him, "I don't mean fifteen, twenty minutes, I mean the whole afternoon or evening, or a day where on your days off you're not cooped up in your office."

"Y/N, I-I—

"I know you have a lot of work, I understand that," you clarify, "I don't want to harass you with this too when you have more important things to take care of, truly—

"Do you think you're not important?" he asks instantly confused, bewildered.

And you... don't really answer him.

You stay completely silent, just watching him back and nothing else with an equally sad look, to which Aemond's face becomes more worried and confused than before.

"Y/N, you are one of my priorities," he tells you hurt, "How come you don't believe that now?"

"Yes I do," you clarify sadly, "What I'm saying is that you barely have time for me and I know it's not your fault because I know your job, but..." you let out a long breath, "Not even a single day have we been able to spend together, not a single one."

He instantly tries to speak, opening his mouth to say something, but immediately closes it and struggles to be able to find the right words he wants to say, getting frustrated with himself.

He really doesn't want to tell you again what you've heard before, but he can't find another explanation because that's the only truth.

He shakes his head, letting his sentence hang in the air, watching you with sorrow, sadness and worry, failing to say anything else, as you feel tears begin to form in your eyes, your vision blurring.

"Y/N, I-I...," he looks sad, "I swear to you, if I could do anything, I would, but...

You press your lips together as you don't want to start crying in front of him, you really don't want him to see you like this, but you can't control it and in an instant the tears fall freely down your cheeks as you avert your defeated gaze from Aemond.

"No, no, please don't cry, my love."

He tells you instantly more concerned than before and you quickly bring your hands up to cover your face, completely embarrassed and trying to control yourself.

But you can't as he quickly encloses you in his arms and pulls you into his body in a protective, comforting way, while at the same time leaving soft kisses in your hair, stroking your back gently with one of his large, firm hands.

"Shh, my sweet girl," he says softly and warmly above your head, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

You instantly hug him back too and sink your face deeper into his chest, sniffling your nose and controlling your sobs, really not wanting to cry anymore.

You missed this, completely. You just wish this wasn't happening under these circumstances.

"It's just that I miss you so much," you confess, clinging tighter to him.

And Aemond's heart breaks into pieces, instantly pulling you tighter against him, hating to see you in this state, hating to see you crying and even worse.... that you're crying for him.

"I miss you too baby, all the time," he says softly, "I miss you so much it fucking hurts."

He instantly leaves more soft kisses in your hair, also on your cheek, holding you tighter against him, while you let yourself be held in his arms and continue to cling against him, not wanting to let go and feeling that if you pull away, he will disappear at any moment right in front of you.

But it's only because you're vulnerable.

You don't know how long you both last like that, it must have only been a minute, but it feels like an eternity for both of you, especially for you, finally starting to calm down.

"I'm sorry," you say in a whisper and try to pull away from him a little, lifting one of your hands to wipe away your tears, "I didn't mean to get like this," you confess sadly, "I shouldn't be selfish."

"Hey, no, look at me."

He says in soft tone, placing one of his hands on your chin to lift your face towards him and you do so, watching him with sadness and embarrassment at the same time, as he gently shakes his head in your direction.

"No, it's not like that, you've just been busy having to attend to your wor—

"You're not selfish love," he makes it clear to you, "You're absolutely right. I've been neglecting you and that's not right of me."

"It's still not right," he insists, concerned, "And to be honest, if I were you I'd feel the same way," he confesses, "But I promise I'll do everything in my power to spend time with you, baby."

You shake your head in his direction.

"There are some things you can't control, Aemond."

"No matter, I miss you too, I want to spend time with you and I'll make sure of that."

You close your eyes and bring your forehead to his, both of you sinking into a comforting silence and a moment you haven't had in a long time, where it's just him and you.

He assures you softly and the two of you say nothing more, just stare into each other's eyes for a few moments.

Then he begins to gently trace your cheek with his thumb, attentively and delicately, watching you lovingly, as if he wants to memorize every detail of your face in his mind.

"My beautiful girl," Aemond murmurs fondly, in a low, soft tone.

You smile slightly and lean your face down to kiss his lips, he instantly reciprocates, holding your waist tighter against him as you place your arms around his neck and take complete refuge in him, needing this.

Aemond holds his hand more firmly on your cheek and deepens the kiss, working his way across your lips with his tongue, beginning to explore your mouth and you respond in kind in a slow, deep kiss.

Then you both part with a wet sound of your lips, you again embracing him and sinking your face into his neck, inhaling his cologne that drives you completely crazy and the fresh scent of detergent on his clothes that at the same time comforts you.

And finally everything feels right.

You there in Aemond's arms, this being exactly what you needed along with communication.

However, as the seconds pass with Aemond still holding you and both of you in that comfortable silence, he can't help but begin to feel guilty and remorseful.

At first he thought about not talking to you about this subject, solely so that you wouldn't worry and feel bad because of him, but now that you both have spoken... he can't keep something like this from you and he knows it's the ideal time.

"Love?"

He calls you softly, catching your attention, still both of you clinging in the embrace and the feel of each other's body with each other close.

"Hm?" you murmur, sending a vibration through his chest.

He presses his lips together for a moment, nervous, but no longer able to bear that another minute passes and you still don't know about this.

"There's something... I haven't told you."

And this definitely gets your attention more.

You slowly turn away from his body, instantly Aemond hating the feeling, then raise your gaze to him, watching him intently and all at once realizing that it's not something you'd like to hear.

You know it by the nervous, worried look he's giving you as you both again look at each other.

"What is it?"

He lets out a long breath, looking away from you for a moment, again having this difficulty being able to say the words he wants to say, wanting to explain everything to you gently, thoughtfully and clearly.

"Y/N... I-I... none of this has really been my decision," he tells you honestly, "But... I'm afraid you'll keep seeing me around this woman."

And it's definitely something you didn't like to hear.

Aemond waits attentively for your reaction, while you continue to watch him intently, your lips parted, a little confused, but neutral, this really not bothering you... yet.

"It's all for work Y/N, I know you know that but I don't want you to think otherwise if another news like this happens again," he tells you cautiously and attentively.

"So you'll go out with her again?"

He lets out a long breath.

"The company needs to associate with hers for our investment in an extra capital, since the attempted association with the Martells didn't work out and my grandfather...he asked me to take it over."

You lower your gaze for a moment, pursing your lips, processing the information, understanding perfectly well that this is solely for work and nothing else, but still... you don't like this woman at all.

"But I can keep Eleonor or Criston around if it's not to your liking," he tells you instantly, turning your gaze back to him, "I've even already taken care with our publicists to deny the rumor by saying it's all work between her and me, also we'll already be prepared in case this happens again."

"Aemond, I understand all of this perfectly," you clarify, assuring him with your tone and look, "I totally trust you but... it's her I don't trust and I don't like the way she behaves when she's around you."

He swallows hard, lowering his gaze for a moment, thinking very carefully about the words he will tactfully say to you next, not wanting to upset you.

"Also... my grandfather has suggested that perhaps it would be good and more efficient for us to partner with Riverlands sooner if I will begin to have an... intimate... relationship with her."

You feel a huge sharp pain in your chest, watching in mild surprise at Aemond, definitely not expecting that.

The silence surrounding you both only increases the pain inside you more, the sadness clinging to your heart, as you lower your gaze and part your lips, having your gaze wander to an invisible spot on the ground.

Tears begin to want to flow from your eyes, again, unable to control your overwhelming emotions any longer. As he instantly sees the sadness all over your face, the disbelief as well, beginning to worry you more.

"Of course I told him no, Y/N."

He tells you instantly, anguished and worried, taking your hands in his, but you don't react, at least not yet.

"He wants the media to start making publicity about the two of us, he thinks it will make the whole process easier and faster, that Rivers will be pleased along with her uncle. Even she...she's come on to me before but, but believe me Y/N, I have stopped her and been very clear with her about you and that I'm not the least bit interested."

"But she is interested in you," you tell her in your low, sad tone of voice, "And you won't be able to do much about it if you have to get yourself associated with her company. You'll have to keep seeing her, be in her company and be accessible to her if you want to make it."

"This shouldn't take me too long, love, I promise," he continues to tell you worriedly, wanting to make you understand, "Yes, you will see me with her but I also promise you that everything for me means work."

"But for her and your grandfather it's not only work, Aemond," you tell him a little more serious, just as sad, "She also wants to have you the other way, that's why she behaved with me the way she behaved when she met me."

You know that, totally.

"I know baby, I know," he tells you softly, "But I will never let her disrespect you, in any way."

He assures you firmly, determined.

"I don't care what my grandfather or her wants, neither what the press says about her and me, all I care about is that you understand that everything for me is work and that I would never do anything to hurt you and end everything between us, believe me that's the last thing I want," he tells you honestly, "And I also want you to keep in mind that I only want you."

You know that Aemond wants you, just the same way you want him and he loves you too, you both love each other, you love him with every fiber of your heart.

But it is all this that does not leave you calm, this is what you have never had to go through before and the insecurity along with the uncertainty consumes you as your mind is spinning non-stop, not even having the idea of what to think, with a knot forming in your stomach.

It all becomes more overwhelming and you don't know if you can get through this together, fearing for the future of the perfect relationship you had with him, the man you love.

And Aemond seeing this, just as worried, anxious and sad as you, not liking this at all either, knowing that he is asking too much of you seeing that you are thinking too fast, all the anxiety and stress through your body, instantly comes back to hug you to comfort you.

But he also does it to comfort himself.

His warm embrace feels like a safe haven in the midst of the moment you are going through, his arms wrapping around you gently but with a strength that makes you feel protected and loved, where you find comfort and his familiar fragrance makes you feel at home.

You experience the love and that connection of the two of you that seem to erase any worry or sadness you feel at that moment, also him, finding that primordial emotional support.

"I promise I will do everything in my power to make this all end soon, I promise love."

He assures you along with his gentle caresses on your back, his soothing words whispered in your ear making the outside world disappear and only the two of you exist, united in a loving embrace that makes you feel complete and loved.

And they also make you feel a sense of calm and hope that with your boyfriend's love and support, everything will be okay.

But neither of you knew what awaited you next.

After your conversation with Aemond, there really isn't much change in the relationship.

You tried your best not to think about him and that woman, you tried not to think about the fact that she was probably in the building at a certain time and that the two of them were together, being a thing almost every day that Aemond had to be in her company.

Your job at the coffe shop helped you not to overthink and focus almost one hundred percent on your classes, although in some free hours you had your boyfriend was in your thoughts.

What fortunately changed was that when your classes were over and you got home, he was already there waiting for you, the first night surprising you and making you feel completely happy.

You both were able to enjoy sharing an extended night together, having dinner, talking about everything and finally going to bed, you have also resumed some movie nights and also the nights of intimacy have been more constant.

But other than that... everything remains the same.

You and he haven't really talked about Rivers, you don't bring it up every time the magazines announce that he and she have been seen together again, clearly because the subject has already been discussed, but still, it makes you feel weird and you really don't like seeing those articles.

But you find it exhaustive that you have to talk it over with him again, so exhaustive for both him and you, that you don't want the two of you to end up having a fight afterwards.

So until now... you can just deal with it.

Until one day in a free hour before your last two-hour class starts, when you have your phone in your hand you get a new message and when you read it, it's from Aemond's sister, Helaena.

Hel🦋: hello beautiful!

Hel🦋: omg it has been ages

Hel🦋: I'm sure the event will be less boring with you🤭

Hel🦋: I am so excited to finally see you again on Saturday

Hel🦋: see you soon!

The messages make you smile and make you start to feel a warmth run through your chest, you too have been missing Hel for a while now as she works at Highgarden as well in a company expansion on her father's.

You haven't seen her for months and clearly communication by message doesn't happen much as both of you, especially her, are just as busy as Aemond.

But the smile doesn't last long on your face as you had no idea about this event, since you know what event it is, only that Aemond hasn't told you about it.

They are one of the typical important events where all the relevant businessmen attend, where they announce new innovations, where they make partners and where basically everyone allies with everyone.

When you get home, this time you are the one who arrives first and although you tried to control yourself by not asking him anything right away, you can't hold back anymore and that's what you do after he gets home from work.

Since you and Aemond started your relationship, you have always accompanied him to these events.

And especially at this one, since it's organized by his family, but you didn't know it would certainly happen because he didn't tell you anything.

And honestly he looks surprised when you ask him why he hadn't told you about the event, not expecting that, this getting your attention and instantly you know the reason isn't good and you're not going to like hearing it.

"I did wanted to tell you because I know we always go together, love" he says to you with some regret, "But now Rivers will be there an—

"You're going with her?"

You just ask him, all starting to form in your mind, while he doesn't say anything back right away and just stares at you uncertainly for a few moments and the realization starts to become more apparent to you.

"Your grandfather told you to take her as your companion?" you ask him more specifically now, watching him intently, waiting for his answer.

And you begin to see perfectly well how he starts to get frustrated.

"Yes but I told him I wouldn't do that," he clarifies instantly, looking at you worried and honest, "That's why I decided better to go on my own if everyone will be there."

You frown slightly at him.

"And what's wrong with me going with you?"

He doesn't answer, watches you for a few moments still with sorrow in his gaze, then lowers his head, staring at the ground as he lets out a long breath and runs a hand over his face.

Then you answer your own question, understanding him.

"You don't want to take me because everyone will be there and your grandfather won't be pleased to see me with you when you should have taken her with you?"

"Love, listen," he tells you immediately, walking towards you, "It's more than that, okay?" he says attentively and distressed, "I just thought that it wouldn't be comfortable for you to go with me to that place if she will be there—

"Everyone is talking about her and you," you tell him with your most serious tone, interrupting him, "Everyone will expect her and you to go together and of course your grandfather won't be happy to see me coming with you, why don't you tell me that?"

"Okay, yes, you are right, but I don't want to go with her, I want to go with you, I have always gone with you," he says in clarification, "But on this occasion I don't think it will be necessary, besides it won't be comfortable for you."

You let out a snort.

"Do you think I won't be able to handle it?"

"No, I mean, of course you can," he tells you instantly, "But you know her, she's very reckless and I don't want us to have a fight after that."

"Then do we put a limit on her, like you have done all this time with her or not?" you ask expectantly.

"Yes, of course I have put limits on her, but in that place..." he pauses, frustrated, "There will be a lot of people, our partners, my family and the press will always be watching, everything will be three times too much. Besides I'll have to attend an announcement along with her and all eyes will be on her and me and I don't want you to feel bad."

You let out a breath, turning your gaze away from him, feeling discomfort in your body, starting to walk away from him to go to your room.

"Okay, I get it, you don't want me to go with you, just say so."

And he reacts instantly.

"Hey, no, no, no, I didn't say that," he says worriedly, stopping you and placing himself in front of you, looking at you pleadingly, "Baby, please."

You let out a long breath, closing your eyes for a moment.

"It's just that you're treating me like I don't know this... your whole world, like I haven't gone to these events with you before," you tell him sadly, "Your grandfather knows we're together and yet he's asking you for this kind of thing... like as if I were a nuisance and at the same time like if I don't exist. And it's been like that ever since she—

You stop, not wanting to say anything else, feeling the lump in your throat and how tears begin to form in your eyes, bringing your hands instantly to your face, not wanting to cry now and feel bad, telling yourself that you're overreacting.

But all of this is really how you feel and you can't help it. And mostly you don't want to show your true feelings or speak your thoughts so as not to overwhelm him.

But just as you understand him, he understands you too.

"Fuck no, please don't cry baby, I hate to see you cry."

He tells you to then wrap you in a warm, firm embrace, holding you tight against his chest where he instantly feels all the tension through your body and pulls you tighter against him, wanting to protect you from everything that hurts you at that moment.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, love."

He tells you in low murmurs as he gently strokes your hair and you let out more of your tears, clinging completely to him.

"No, it's not your fault," you tell him sadly, sobbing softly against his chest.

He lets out a sigh.

"Yes it is," he says softly, "You don't deserve any of this."

He leaves a soft kiss in your hair, still hugging you and having no intention of letting you go, while you let yourself be carried away by the comforting warmth of his body, wanting to keep feeling that familiarity and security that only he can give you, in spite of everything.

"I know things have been hard lately and I'm so sorry, but... I love you and I care about you, you mean the whole world to me."

"I know babe," you murmur back, "I love you too and I'm sorry, I didn't mean to get like this."

"No, no, it's okay love," he assures you, "We're going to get through this, just like we always have, remember?"

You nod your head even though you have it resting against his chest, then sniffle your nose and raise one of your hands to wipe away your tears, as he pulls away from you a little so he can look into your eyes and leave a soft kiss on your lips which you instantly reciprocate, again taking refuge in his arms.

Both of you at that moment feel vulnerable and lost for a moment in the uncertainty of the situation, but you knew you had to face whatever it was together.

Aemond feels in control of the relationship, but you feel more at a crossroads because of the uncertain future of the relationship itself.

[bellaxgiornata]

You Are My Sunshine [2]

Pairing: Jax Teller x Fem!Reader Word count: 4.8k [Series Masterlist] [Jax Teller Masterlist]

Warnings/tags: 18+; sunshine!Reader/grumpy!Jax (somewhat), fluff, angst, friends to lovers, eventual smut, canon divergent, canon typical violence (more tags to possibly come)

a/n: May have been on a roll with writing, so enjoy part two sooner than anticipated! I greatly appreciated all the comments on the last part, too! Y'all are the reason I've already started on part three. I've also found that I'm enjoying the Jax POV's so there's more in this one and the next! Feedback and reblogs are always appreciated!

tag list: @mariamadison6-blog @moongirlgodness

The rush of customers in the coffee shop had finally dwindled down after opening, leaving you with the usual mid-morning lull with which you’d grown accustomed. The elderly couple that came in almost every single morning around the same time to have a coffee was sitting at the exact same table in the far corner where they always sat, sipping their coffees and chatting quietly with each other. A college-aged young woman currently sat posted up at the front counter with her laptop and a notebook, her attention focused on an assignment. The sight of them brought a smile to your face as you filled up your small watering can at the underbar sink behind the counter.

You’d opened this coffee shop with the intention of it becoming a place for people around Charming to feel welcome. Whether that meant Honest Coffee was a spot to come and enjoy a cup of coffee for a first date or with a spouse of thirty years, or a place for students to focus on homework or others to come in and work. Whatever it was that brought repeat customers in here and allowed you the opportunity to meet the members of your town, it gave you joy seeing your shop growing into exactly what you’d hoped it could become. 

Mia, one of the baristas you’d hired when the shop had first opened months ago, stood beside you as she cleaned down the machines and wiped down the counters. You’d noticed she wasn’t quite as chatty, working in an unusually thoughtful silence this morning, but just as you’d been about to ask if something was on her mind, the approaching rumble of motorcycles had caused her to stiffen and stop working. The noise grabbed your own attention as it drowned out the sound of the music playing over the speakers. You gave Mia a curious sidelong glance before the line of bikes pulling into the lot across the street drew your attention over to the front windows of your coffee shop. 

Standing there holding the full watering can in your hands, you watched with Mia as the handful of men rolled into the lot across the street in the bright morning sunshine. The group of men backed up in the parking lot, lining their bikes beside each other in front of the clubhouse. The difference was almost immediate once they all began to cut their engines, the shop becoming noticeably quieter than it had been a second ago. It was something else you’d also just grown accustomed to with having a coffee shop located across the street from the Sons of Anarchy. 

It didn’t skip your notice how the few people in the shop were all reacting to the motorcycle club, either. Besides the way Mia had gone completely still beside you, the young woman working on her laptop was agitatedly clicking her nails on the countertop. Across the shop, the elderly couple was staring out of the window beside them with matching guarded expressions on their faces before you caught them exchanging a look with each other. The elderly woman rolled her eyes at her husband and you frowned at the sight.

It wasn't that you were oblivious about what was said around town about the Sons, because you definitely weren't. You'd heard the rumors–everything from them selling guns to making crack to being killers for hire. You knew most of the things people said about them were embellished, false assumptions, but you also were aware that some things probably held some truth. 

But that didn't matter to you. You were a firm believer in everyone deserving a fair chance. Equal treatment. You'd met Gemma, the supposed matriarch of the Sons, a few times now. She had come in often after you had first opened the shop. And while she'd absolutely come across completely different than the usual citizens of Charming, you'd found her to be a very sweet woman–in her own special way. And you'd had a strong inkling that her visits to your shop for coffee as she chatted with you about your plants or how business was coming along had just been a way for her to ease the pain of missing her son while he was doing time in Stockton.

A few nights ago when you had finally met that son of hers, you'd gotten a feel for the Sons’ President. You weren't entirely sure what had brought him in after you had closed that night–because you were certain it wasn't the coffee–but you had caught the hint of pain hidden deep in the depths of his blue eyes despite all of his charming smiles and pet names. In all honesty, he had seemed lonely and lost beneath all that playboy persona you'd heard about. You hadn't minded letting him stay to chat because he seemed like he needed a friend or some kind words, even if he didn't realize it himself. And you had been content to be that for a short time.

“It's unfortunate your coffee shop is across the street from that,” Mia muttered.

Snapping out of your thoughts at the sound of her voice, you looked over at where she'd resumed cleaning down the counter. You could feel the frustration building in your gut, but you did your best to tamp it down and keep it at bay. Not everyone in Charming was as determined to be as open-minded as you were. It was a small town, after all. And it wasn't like the Sons hadn't caused their own fair share of trouble over the years.

“Why do you say that?” you asked.

Setting the filled watering can down on the counter, you turned and focused on your employee. Mia pulled a face at the question before she dropped the towel she was cleaning with onto the countertop and fixed her full attention on you.

“Really?” she asked before gesturing a hand at the front shop window. “Your coffee shop is across the street from a whole criminal operation. A very loud, very crude one. It's not exactly the most ideal location.”

Shrugging a shoulder, your eyes darted across the street. A bunch of men in kuttes, as Jax had taught you they were called the other night, were congregating in front of their bikes. You could easily make out Jax amongst the group from his blonde hair even from this distance. He looked angry about something as he spoke, one of his arms gesturing in wide, sharp movements. Briefly you wondered what had made him quite so furious before your attention returned to Mia and the topic of conversation.

“The rent was vastly more affordable for this building,” you told her, knowing exactly why it was. “And while it can occasionally get a little noisy with the motorcycles, and some people aren't the biggest fan of our neighbors, I don't really feel bothered by their presence.”

Mia sent you a flat look, one of her brows arching upwards in disbelief. “They don't bother you? Are you completely insane?”

“They're really not that bad,” you disagreed.

Both of Mia's brows shot up onto her forehead at that, her jaw partially dropping. You playfully rolled your eyes at her in return, an amused smile curving the corners of your lips. She was always so dramatic.

“Are you serious?” Mia asked. “Have you forgotten Gemma already since her last visit?”

You shook your head at the question. Of course you hadn't forgotten the woman. You didn’t think it was possible for anyone to forget her.

“Gemma is just blunt. She speaks her mind,” you replied. “Maybe it's a bit much for most people, but she's really not all that bad.”

“Well the guys over there–” Mia continued, gesturing back out the front window with a hand again while remaining focused on you, “–definitely aren't good.”

You shook your head, picking the full watering can up from its place on the counter. “That is entirely a matter of opinion. You can’t paint people in black and white, Mia. What one person considers “good” is arguably “bad” to someone else, and vice versa. It's objective. A social construct. It isn't like they haven't participated in charity work around Charming. Done things to arguably help the town on occasion, either.”

“Well, you can't argue that they don't break laws. And I think killing people is pretty black and white, boss,” Mia called after you as you began watering the plants in the shop. “That’s about as sharp of a contrast as you can get between the two.”

“Maybe in some cases,” you agreed, watering one of your pothos plants that had been growing like crazy in a hanging basket nearby. “But to some extent, I think there's more factors to be considered before passing judgement. Like the why behind it all. Something no one in this town probably really knows when it comes to each one of them.”

Mia exhaled sharply at your words, the sound almost like she was deflating at your response. A moment later she began laughing a little, the noise catching your attention as you moved to water the next plant.

“Okay, I didn't sign up for one of your lectures on morality this morning,” Mia teased you.

You grinned as you focused back on watering the plant before you. “All I'm saying is that humans are complex, you can't just–”

“Lectures on morality?” Gemma's distinct voice cut through the conversation, causing both you and Mia to glance over at the shop’s entrance. “I thought you just sold coffee here, now you're lecturing on morality, sweetheart?”

Mia grew tense behind the counter instantly, her mouth closing as she forced a professional smile onto her face that clearly looked forced when she greeted Gemma. But you genuinely smiled over at the dark-haired woman, and that smile only grew wider when you saw who she had brought with her–Abel. His blonde head came to just about knee-height beside her as he held onto her hand, but the moment the almost one-and-a-half year old little boy saw you, the biggest smile spread across his own face. 

During Jax’s time away in Stockton, Gemma had spent a lot of time watching Abel when he wasn't with his nanny. Which meant sometimes she had brought him with her when she came in for coffee, so you had gotten to know him along with Gemma over the past few months. And Abel had gotten used to the free cookie you'd given him every time–anything from chocolate chips to snickerdoodles to monster cookies. He'd taken to calling you ‘cookie’ because of it, something you personally adored hearing in his little voice every time.

“I didn't know my favorite customer was coming in today!” you exclaimed.

Turning in a hurry, you set the watering can down on the counter behind you before rushing across your shop, not having seen the little boy for over a week. The moment he began hopping in place next to Gemma, his small hand still wrapped around hers, you felt your heart melt. He was the sweetest little boy.

“You're more chipper than usual today,” Gemma observed.

You caught the teasing smile on her face before you knelt down in front of Abel, your smile widening when he waved at you and called you 'cookie’ once again. You'd been about to open your mouth to ask him if he was ready to pick out a cookie today, but a now familiar voice behind Gemma caught your attention.

“What about cookies, little man?” 

Looking up from your place on the floor of the shop, you saw Jax stepping inside just behind his mother, the door falling shut behind him. The moment his attention left Abel and focused on you, you went still. Judging by the look of confusion on his face, you guessed he hadn't known about Abel's visits with Gemma to your shop. But behind that outward confusion written on his face, you could still see the remnants of something like anger left over from when you'd seen him yelling about something across the street a short time ago. You were half tempted to ask how he was doing today, but you had a feeling the question would be met with either a lie or hostility. So you left it alone this time. 

“Been bringing Abel here with me since you boys were in Stockton,” Gemma explained, turning on the spot and studying her own son closely as he stepped further inside. “He calls the owner ‘cookie’ cause she always gives him one when he visits.”

Jax's expression shifted to something harder when his mother mentioned Stockton Prison, a muscle jumping in his cheek. You quietly watched as some sort of silent exchange occurred between them while you remained kneeling in front of Abel.

“The hell are you doing here, anyway, Jackson?” Gemma asked after a moment of silence, still eyeing him suspiciously. “Don't you have a...thing to go deal with?”

Jax’s eyes narrowed at his mother before he answered. “A few of the guys are handling it right now,” he replied, voice tense. “Thought I'd see what you and Abel were up to. Figured I could use a coffee myself.”

Gemma’s head tilted to the side, one dark brow arching up at his comment as if she didn’t quite believe him. Not wanting to get in the middle of whatever was going on between them, you stood back up, eyes shifting between the pair.

“So…is it alright if I let Abel pick out a cookie this morning?” you asked cautiously.

Both Gemma and Jax turned their attention to you at the sound of your voice. Almost simultaneously they both responded to the question, the sight causing you to bite back a grin.

“Of course, sweetheart.”

“Sure thing, sunshine.”

Gemma's head immediately snapped in Jax’s direction as she pulled a face at him. “Sunshine?” she questioned sharply.

Fighting down a laugh at the briefly sheepish expression you caught on Jax’s face before he recovered, you grabbed Abel's hand and led him over towards the front counter. You noticed the firm look Jax sent his mother before you walked away–the one clearly telling her to not say anything further.

As you helped Abel pick out one of the freshly baked cookies you had made–peanut butter brownie swirl–you could hear Mia awkwardly taking Gemma and Jax’s drink order behind the register. She began fumbling behind the counter shortly afterwards as she started on Gemma's latte, clearly more thrown off by the presence of Jax with her this time. The only time he'd come into the coffee shop was the other night after closing when it had just been you here. Besides that night and Gemma's visits, no other Son or affiliate of the Sons had ever actually come into your shop. 

You could tell Jax’s presence wasn't just affecting Mia as Abel happily ran back to his father's side with his cookie in hand. The young woman at the counter doing her schoolwork kept shooting Jax nervous sideways glances. She had almost imperceptibly inched away from them where she sat at the counter, as if wanting to put some distance between herself and the pair. Across the room, the elderly couple was scowling at Gemma and Jax, whispering amongst themselves at the table. 

Oddly enough, neither Jax nor Gemma seemed to notice or react to the negative attention. They were too busy leaning against the counter waiting for their drinks as Abel contentedly munched on his cookie, both mother and son talking in hushed tones. Your smile faltered a little at the wary look you once more caught on the young woman's face before you saw Mia growing flustered behind the counter. Deciding to rescue her, you joined her behind the counter and started on Jax’s coffee–the same order as what you'd made him the other night.

Mia shot you a grateful look as she filled the frothing pitcher with milk. “Thank you,” she whispered.

Smiling as you started on Jax’s coffee, you shook your head at her. “You're making this into something more than it needs to be,” you whispered back. “They're just here for coffee like anyone else.”

Mia leaned over towards you, pausing as she set the frothing wand of the espresso machine into the pitcher. “Usually my customers aren't armed though,” she countered quietly. “That makes a difference.”

“He's not going to shoot you for messing up a coffee order,” you told her as you grabbed a to-go cup for Jax’s coffee.

“You have no proof of that. Just look at his face today, he looks like he'd shoot someone for less,” she murmured.

The loud sound of the milk frothing abruptly ended the conversation as Mia focused back on Gemma's order. As Jax’s coffee began extracting into the pitcher, you couldn’t resist looking over your shoulder to where he and his mother were still leaning against the counter. 

He did look upset, Mia wasn't wrong about that. Both of his brows were pulled marginally together, a slight crease visible between them. His mouth was drawn into a straight line as he listened to whatever Gemma was saying, the corners of his lips occasionally shifting downwards. There was even a noticeable stiffness in the way he was just leaning against the countertop that hadn't been there when you'd met him the other night. But behind all that rigidness that made him look tightly wound, there was an exhaustion in his eyes that seemed like it went further than just a bad night of sleep.

Chewing the inside of your cheek, you focused back on the coffee you were making, but a second later an idea struck you. Reaching over beside the stack of to-go cups, you grabbed the black marker used for writing names on orders and began writing something small on the outside of his cup, a faint smile on your lips as you did. Afterwards, you placed the cap on the marker and set it back before you began filling Jax’s cup with the coffee that had finished brewing. As you finished up, you heard Mia turn around and nervously give Gemma her drink. 

Grabbing a lid, you fastened it onto Jax’s cup before also turning around. He was already focused on you, his blue eyes watching as you stepped over to where the pair stood on the other side of the counter. You set Jax's drink down in front of him, a warm and friendly smile on your face. He looked like he could use one–and probably a hug, too, but you figured that would certainly be a weird offer. 

“Thanks, sunshine,” Jax said.

There was the ghost of a smile on his lips for the briefest of moments before it disappeared as his hand reached out, grabbing the cup without looking at it. He looked as if he'd been about to say something more, but the amused huff from Gemma had his expression quickly growing further irritated than it had been a moment ago. 

“Won't bother you today,” Jax told you, pushing off the counter with his ringed hand. “Gotta deal with some shit. But thanks for the coffee.”

A small pang of disappointment hit you when you realized he wasn't going to even chat for a minute, but you figured you should just count it as a win that he had come back into the shop at all. Maybe that meant there’d be a third visit. With a smile still on your lips, you nodded back at him.

“Of course,” you replied. “I'm always happy to fuel a caffeine addiction.”

Gemma laughed a little, shaking her head at what you’d said. It was a line you'd used a few times now and she knew that. 

“You should lay off on snorting those coffee beans, sweetie. You're already plenty perky,” she teased as she grabbed Abel's hand.

“Or maybe that's my secret,” you jokingly countered, enjoying the way Jax seemed to be fighting back a grin as he sauntered over to the counter by the exit to add sweetener into his coffee. “A few lines of freshly ground beans first thing in the morning. Wakes you right up.”

Gemma laughed, the sound loud and genuine. A flood of pride hit you, especially when Jax began securing the lid back on his coffee, his attention on you as an almost cocky, amused grin tugged at his lips. Maybe it was only for a moment, but you’d briefly brightened both of their mornings. 

“You take care, sunshine,” Gemma teased.

She turned and led Abel out of the door, Jax following behind her now with a surly look on his face at the way she’d used his nickname for you. Mia stepped over beside you as they left, watching the three of them cross the street back towards the clubhouse and Teller-Morrow. 

“It’s insanely weird how well you can get along with absolutely anyone,” Mia said after a moment, turning to look over at you standing beside her. “You realize that, right?”

Your smile only grew wider at her words as your eyes remained fixed on the retreating form of Jax. You’d gotten a bit more of a genuine smile out of him today even if you hadn’t gotten much conversation. That was something, at least. Eyes shifting over to Mia, you shrugged a shoulder.

“I like people,” you answered simply.

“The hell you think you’re doing with that girl over there?” Gemma asked sharply.

Her eyes fell on Jax as they passed the line of bikes in front of the clubhouse, Abel’s hand still wrapped around hers as he finished eating his cookie. Jax immediately rolled his eyes at his mother’s tone, not interested in being scolded like he was a teenager all over again.

“I’m not doing anything,” he responded firmly. 

Gemma shot him a pointed look, clearly not buying what he was saying. He huffed in annoyance, stuffing his free hand into his jeans pocket as he brought his coffee cup up to his lips for another drink. Christ, it was still as good as the other night when you’d made him one.

“Bullshit,” Gemma continued. “Sunshine? Really? I’ve never once in my life heard you call a woman that, Jax. And I’ve heard you call them plenty of shit.”

He swallowed down the coffee, his irritation rising with where he felt she was trying to take this conversation. “So what? It’s a goddamn nickname, Gem. You got a problem with a nickname now?” he snapped at her.

Her lips drew into a thin line across her face as she came to an abrupt halt which in turn had Jax stopping just behind her and Abel. The way her eyes narrowed at him meant trouble and he knew it.

“That sweet, nice coffee shop owner back there is not club pussy, Jackson,” she began sternly. “Just because her shop happens to be as close as it is to the clubhouse does not mean–”

“Jesus Christ, relax!” he shouted, cutting her clean off. “You don’t think I know that? I’m not interested in her like that, alright? I just stopped over there the other night because…” 

His voice trailed off for a minute, unable to even try to think of a reason as to why he had, especially with the way Gemma was staring at him right now. Truthfully, he still hadn’t known why he’d gone into your shop the other night in the first place, but he’d be lying if he said he hadn’t thought about you on and off since then. And he certainly had still been watching you through your shop’s windows.

Jax ran a hand across his mouth in agitation before he continued, trying to keep his tone more level. “Look, I stopped in there the other night ‘cause I saw her closing up. She always just looks so goddamn happy and…I dunno. Just made me curious what the hell was up with someone like that, okay? I’m not trying to get her in my bed or anything, Gem. I promise.”

“Better not be,” Gemma warned, her eyes still narrowed at him. “Because that girl is not meant for our world and you know it. She’s far too kind and sweet, she’d probably have a heart attack spending one night around the guys at the clubhouse. And I don’t need you charming your way into her bed and breaking her tender little heart and having her spitting into my coffee whenever I stop in because I birthed a little shit.”

Jax scoffed, pulling a face at her over-dramatic words. “I’m not going to sleep with her. You can calm the hell down already. And I highly doubt she’d ever spit into a coffee, she seems far too nice for that.”

“Not the point,” Gemma countered. 

Jax watched as his mother led his son by the hand back towards TM’s office, a scowl on his face as the noise from the garage rang out around him. Anger flared within Jax from the conversation he’d just had with her. He didn’t know why her warning to stay away from you had him bristling and itching to hit something because she’d been completely right on all fronts. You were a good person and absolutely nothing like the club whores he was used to. Not that he’d had any intention of it, but sleeping with you would certainly end with your heart getting broken because Jax was not a relationship kind of guy–even less so after the bullshit with Tara that made him hate the idea of one even more. And the thought of you knowing any little bit about the things he’d done for the club had his hand tightening around the paper cup of coffee you’d given him. 

Gemma was entirely right. You weren’t someone who belonged in his world. Without a doubt, Jax knew the only thing he’d ever be capable of doing to you would be snuffing out that bright, warm light he found himself strangely drawn to, and that wasn’t something he’d ever want to do to you–even if he barely knew you. 

Teeth gritting together, Jax knew that you’d be better off if he stopped visiting your damn coffee shop. He glanced over at the nearby trash can just outside of the garage. He exhaled a sharp breath and made his way over towards it, reaching his hand out with the mostly full cup of coffee. As it hovered over the open bin, Jax about to drop it into the garbage, black ink hidden behind his hand caught his eye.

Frowning, he pulled the cup back and shifted his hold on it to get a better look. In small, delicate handwriting he saw the words ‘maybe this is the cup.’ Jax’s eyes narrowed in confusion as he reread the line over again, wondering what the hell you’d meant by writing that on his cup. And then he remembered the other night when he’d stopped into your shop and you’d told him you believed a good cup of coffee could make a bad day better or some bullshit along those lines. When he’d disagreed, he remembered your words exactly, hearing your own voice in his head for a moment. 

“You never know, maybe you just haven't had the right cup of coffee yet.”

An amused breath fell out of Jax as he shook his head at the fucking cup of coffee in his hand, reading what you’d written again–“maybe this is the cup.” You were so goddamn persistent and optimistic, weren’t you? You really thought one of these days that a stupid cup of coffee was going to somehow change his day, didn’t you?

“You’re something else, sunshine,” Jax muttered to the cup in his hand.

He stared at it for a moment longer, his eyes tracing along the lines of black ink before a voice behind him cut through his thoughts. Jax’s head darted over his shoulder, spotting Chibs making his way towards him.

“There ya are, Jackie,” he began. “Was lookin’ for ya. We got an update on that problem, might wanna head to the chapel so we can fill ya in.”

Jax sighed softly, nodding his head at Chibs. “Right,” he agreed. “Let’s go.”

He turned around, following Chibs back across the lot to the clubhouse. As he walked, he drew the cup of coffee up to his lips for another drink. When he swallowed the warm liquid down, his gaze inevitably returned to your neat, delicate script beside his fingers. The corner of his lips twitched.

[deliciousangelfestival]

Let Me Love You | 1 - B. Barnes

Character: college!Bucky x Female!Reader

Summary: On a mysterious, rainy night, Bucky witnesses a distressing encounter involving his crush.

Main Masterlist || support: Ko-fi

Chapter 1, Chapter 2 , Chapter 3 , Chapter 4 , Chapter 5 , Chapter 6 , Chapter 7 , Chapter 8.

Thank you to anyone who gave a like, reblog, and left a comment. It motivated me to write more. 

Fast-food restaurants are always the quick choice for exhausted students after learning a lesson.

Today, WHAM Burger near St. Louis University is bustling with customers, mostly college students from the university. The aroma of sizzling burgers and the familiar hum of conversations fill the air.

Inside the restaurant, everyone stands in line at the cashier or fiddles with the self-order machine. Even the drive-thru is buzzing with activity. Most cars have to wait, but for Bucky, who is behind the wheel, the wait is inconsequential. However, his friends, Steve and Sam, seem less patient.

“Their double cheeseburgers are delicious. But eating them three times a week? I'm going to hate my favorite food, Bucky,” Steve remarks from the back seat.

Bucky rolls his eyes. “There are other choices, like salads.”

Sam laughs, fingers dancing on his phone screen. “You'd have to put a gun to Steve's head if you want him to eat a salad.”

Bucky chuckles, his eyes focused on the road. Sam and Steve sigh, observing their friend who has become a love fool. Almost every week, they find themselves at this fast-food haven. There's a particular reason Bucky insists on coming here.

Finally, their car inches forward to the cashier's window. Bucky rolls down the window and is greeted by a familiar face.

“Welcome to WHAM Burger. Oh, hi, guys!” Your bright voice cuts through the air, and the trio of friends can't help but smile.

“Hi, Y/N,” Sam and Steve chime in, well aware that Bucky becomes speechless when he sees you.

You flash them a genuine smile, recognizing the familiar faces. Your fingers swiftly input their usual order. “You guys just got back from the chess club?”

Bucky nods, attempting to say more but finding his words stuck. He never anticipated becoming a lovefool, but he fell for you the first time he laid eyes on you.

It was on a snowy day when Bucky first saw you. A girl, squatting down to rescue a stray cat. That quiet moment led to him forgetting his chess tournament appointment, instead accompanying you to the nearby shelter.

You, a stranger in the area, had just landed a part-time job at the fast-food joint. Bucky admired your selflessness and love for animals. Even though you couldn't adopt the cat, he assured you someone would. In gratitude, you treated him to hot chocolate, and in that instant, Bucky fell in love.

However, his friends later shattered his newfound joy, revealing that you had a boyfriend, the quarterback, Lloyd Hansen, and that you were childhood sweethearts.

Back in the present, your cheerful voice snaps Bucky out of his reminiscence. “Thank you so much. Please come again.”

“Yes, yes, I will,” Bucky mumbles, grabbing the card from your hand. The slight touch sends a jolt through him, and he can't help feeling like a creep.

As Bucky drives away from the drive-thru, Sam and Steve enjoy their fries, teasing Bucky about moving on.

“Dude, you need to move on. If not, both of us are going to gain weight,” Steve says, munching on his cheeseburger.

Bucky rolls his eyes. "I didn't invite you." Despite not being explicitly invited, the three always go home together since they live in the same apartment building, and WHAM Burger is conveniently on the way.

Bucky huffs, but he can't stay mad at them. After all, they've been his closest friends since high school. Despite their advice, he can't fathom why his feelings for you continue to grow. If there's a love cupid, Bucky can't help but blame it, as the cupid seems to have misfired its arrow onto the wrong target.

In the rearview mirror, Sam and Steve exchange knowing glances, silently hoping their friend will soon find a way to move on from his unrequited love.

Reader P.O.V

“Shit… shit.” You blame yourself for not bringing an umbrella with you, even though since the morning, you noticed the clouds had a dark color.

You protect the food bag to make sure it doesn't get wet. You had just finished your shift when your boyfriend, Lloyd, texted you to bring food to his practice.

Lloyd and you have been together since childhood, crowned as king and queen at prom night. Everyone says that both of you are a sweet couple.

Lloyd got a full scholarship for his athletics and is studying law. Meanwhile, you received half a scholarship. St. Louis is a prestigious university with famous alumni.

It has been your dream to study here, and you also want to stay with Lloyd. However, growing up, you learned to be responsible on your own, managing your own money and working.

Between studies, clubs, and part-time jobs, you and Lloyd used to be close, but now, it's getting difficult to meet. Lloyd has become busy with practices and interviews since he brought a championship to the university.

But you want to make this relationship work.

When the bus stops in front of the university, you have to run to the university gym.

You sprint as fast as you can despite the heavy rain.

Lloyd is lifting weights when he sees you soaking wet. He grabs a towel and dries your hair. “Thanks, babe. You came all the way here.”

You reply, “It's alright.”

“Has the food arrived?” A female voice is heard from behind you.

You turn around and see a girl with perfect hair, wearing a training outfit that accentuates her body curves.

You glance down at yourself still wearing your work uniform and a jacket.

Lloyd says, “Yup. Here you go,” as he hands the food bag to Nicky. She's the daughter of the university football sponsor. Lloyd have mentioned her name a few times. But everytime you hear her name, you don't feel secure.

You clench your fist, watching their interaction. Lloyd gives Nicky the food you brought with effort through this heavy rain, and Nicky shows a shy smile towards him.

Your heart sinks as you catch the subtle exchange of glances between them. The smile that Lloyd reserves for you is now being shared with someone else. It feels like a stab in the chest, a betrayal you didn't see coming.

Lloyd looks at you. “Could you wait for a while? We will go back together.”

You put on a fake smile that you've mastered at work. “No, it's alright. I came here with an Uber car. The driver is waiting for me.” You lied; your phone battery had already died.

Lloyd nods. “Alright, text me when you've arrived.”

“Okay.”

You turn and walk faster to avoid the eyes of the bystanders. You don’t want your effort to be judged.

When you get out from the building, the rain is still pouring heavily. You grit your teeth. Is this your unluckiest day?

You run faster to the bus stop while crying.

“Y/N.”

You think your ears have mistaken you. With this heavy rain, you hear someone call your name.

It's impossible.

“Y/N!”

The voice becomes clearer. You turn around and see the silhouette getting closer. He comes running while holding an umbrella.

“Bucky?”

Bucky was just walking out from the library. He was in the chess club when he saw you running from the university gym. He wonders what the heck you are doing alone in this heavy rain.

When he sees your eyes red and your nose, it seems like you've just cried. The same happened when he found out you had a boyfriend; his eyes and nose were red too.

And he sees you coming out of the gym; that means the cause is related to Lloyd.

But now he can't let you be like this. He gives you his umbrella and runs back to the library.

You are stunned while holding the umbrella. Bucky suddenly appears, giving you the umbrella, and runs away.

You try to catch up with him, but he runs too fast. You can only shout, “Bucky, thank you!”

Tomorrow, you have to say thank you to Bucky. At least today, someone cared for you. You feel gratitude and confusion at the rain-soaked bus stop. Bucky's unexpected act of kindness adds another layer to your swirling emotions.

The next day, when you went to find Bucky, he wasn't in class. Both of you studied business.

Steve told you, "Bucky got a fever, so he stayed at home." You felt guilty when you heard that because the reason why he got sick is because of last night; he gave you his umbrella.

You asked Steve, "Can I visit him?" Steve couldn't believe what he just heard, but if you came to visit Bucky, perhaps his fever would be gone in a second. "Sure, I'll give you the address," he said, raising an eyebrow in surprise.

You nodded appreciatively, saying, "Thank you," with a sincere smile.

‘Cough, cough.’

Bucky poured water into a glass. He had a fever and a sore throat because of the rain last night. The relentless downpour seemed to echo the storm within him, a storm fueled by the regret of not bringing you home with his car. He couldn't shake the thought that if he had, perhaps he wouldn't be in this sickly state.

‘Knock. Knock.’

He opened the door, never expecting to find you standing there. You held a steaming bowl of hot soup in your hands. “Bucky, I’m sorry. Because of me, you got sick.”

Bucky shyly answered, the lines of worry etched on his face. It wouldn't matter if he had to cross a sea of fire; he would do it for you. “No, it’s not because of you.” He grabbed the food you brought, appreciating the warmth it brought, both physically and emotionally. “Thank you. You didn’t have to do this.”

You shook your head, a genuine smile gracing your face. “You really helped me last night. Thank you.”

Feeling restless and vulnerable in his weakened state, Bucky looked at you nervously and said, “I have something to tell you.”

Author Note:

Hey friends,

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[lamoobsessions]

To Guild A Lily

Synopsis: You and Hazel have been together for six months now and things have been going really great. That is, until you stupidly invite her to meet your family over spring break -your family, who does not know your gay.

Warnings: Homophobia, very little use of y/n, things get a twinge spicy but its not smutty, kinda cheesy but it's cute.

Word Count: 6k

A/N: Hey 😏 It's been a while, and i'm sorry. But I'm back AND with a new story. This one will be a short mini series -probably three chapters tbh. Originally, I didn't think I was going to post it, because it lwk feels too personal. But what the heck, I like it, so here it is!! Christmas break is here, so i'll defiantly get some writing in for anyone who cares, lol. Anyway, I hope you enjoy! (And also apologies in advanced)

───────── ౨ৎ ─────────

The decision to attend a university outside of your home town was the best decision you’ve ever made. It’s been everything you hoped it to be. You made friends, you have your freedom, you have your independence, and, the best part of all, you have a different social demographic. Which may be a weird detail to others, but to you, it’s a blessing. No longer do you have to live behind the social constraints provided by the community you grew up in.

Though, that isn’t to say college is fantastic. The workload is insane, your apartment is depressing as hell, living expenses are through the roof, and making a healthy consistent meal plan for yourself feels near impossible. College can be awful at times, but it fulfills your small box of expectations. 

Truly, you’re quite happy with where you are in life. Everything has a certain glow to it, a certain beauty. With this new-found freedom and privacy, you joined new social cliques, attended parties, joined clubs, and took all the classes that attune your interest. Which is how you met Hazel.

She sat next to you in a gender studies class in the second semester of your freshman year, which you later found out she only took the class with her friend PJ to meet the ladies of the campus. Which, to her credit and your pleasure, she accomplished. 

The two of you hit it off almost instantly; from quipped, sly whispered jokes in the lecture halls, to not-so productive study dates, the two of you eventually fell into place with each other. She introduced you to her friends, both of whom you found very intimidating at first, since they make a very chaotic duo. Even so, they grew on you, and it wasn’t long til you became a part of their group. It also wasn’t long til your feelings for Hazel began to sprout. 

It happened at the library -of all places. She made the first move and the two of you have been together for almost six months now. Things have been great. 

It takes a lot for you to open up to people, but when it came to Hazel, things felt easier. Suddenly, you felt more bold, more electric with your personality. Those around you could sense the shift, even your family, who lived hours away.

In your eyes, this is a good thing. The relationship you have with your family is complicated. You love each of them to death. Your mother, your father, your sister, all of them you’d take a bullet for. Unconditional love, as many may call it. But they were… different when it came to values. More on the old-fashioned side than you typically prefer. But the thing with college is, you get to break away from home, and that’s exactly what you did -well somewhat. Your mom still calls every day to check up, mostly asking if you've met anyone yet, and by anyone, she means a boy. 

It’s isolating at times, knowing your family doesn’t know this integral part of who you are. But, in your eyes, it was for the better.  

Though, after six months of being with Hazel, a certain consensus within yourself was breached. It felt unfair to your family, since they were always asking if you’ve made any friends or found a boyfriend yet. And secondly, it’s unfair to Hazel. You met her mom three months after dating, it wasn’t planned, but it happened, and now you feel an insatiable obligation to introduce her to your family. 

But the kicker is, Hazel doesn’t know that your family is oblivious to her existence. They’re even oblivious to the fact that you like girls. So, you’ve avoided bringing it up. 

You don’t want to ruin a good thing. Things are so easy, why mess it up? 

“So, when are you leaving?” Hazel asks from the foot of your bed, watching as you shove ungodly amounts of clothes into your small suitcase on the floor. 

You shrug, placing another chunky sweater that surely will not fit into the luggage. The thing isn’t going to close, but you’ll be damned if you weren’t going to try. “I think maybe early tomorrow morning? What about you?”

“Oh, I’m not going home,” she casually reveals. “I think I’ll just stay here.”

You stop your pushing and look up at her questioningly. “What? Why not?”

“My mom will be out of town the whole week, so there’s basically no point in me going back home.”

“She’s going out of town the week of your spring break?”

Hazel nods with a slightly solemn expression, to which you purse your lips, knowing her complicated relationship with her mother. 

“What about PJ and Josie, they’ll be going home too, right? Why don’t you go with them?”

She sighs, leaning into the mattress. “Josie is going on vacation with Isabel and her family, and PJ said she’s going on some ‘pussy’ retreat -whatever that means.”

You frown at this. The college campus was nice, but there wasn’t much to do. Without any friends around, it gets boring and depressing fast. You would know. You spent the first semester of your freshman year losing your goddamn mind, rotting in your dorm room binging the entirety of ‘Orange is the New Black’.

“Well, you can come home with me,” You offer, wanting to bite your tongue the second the suggestion leaves your lips. 

“Really?” Hazel perks up excitingly. 

“Yeah, why not? It’s only a five-hour drive, it will be like a fun little road trip or something.” For you, it wouldn’t be a fun little road trip. It would be a nightmare of spiraling thoughts and contemplative re-routes to the nearest cliff. But you can’t stand the thought of leaving Hazel, knowing she would be left alone on campus for a whole two weeks. 

“You sure your family won’t mind?”

As you stop packing and grab your phone off the nightstand, a nest of anxiety burrows behind your ribcage. You’re a good liar, or, to put it more lightly, you’re good at masking your true emotions. “I’m sure they won’t. I can text them and ask if that will make you feel more comfortable with it.”

“Can you?” She questions with a look of sincerity. “I don’t want to just show up unannounced.”

“Yeah, of course,” You plant yourself next to her on the bed, subtly hiding the phone screen. Now, with the phone in your hands and your mother's contact photo glowing on the screen, you begin to wonder what you’re even supposed to say.

 ‘Hey mom, I know I haven’t told you this yet, but I’m gay, and I have a girlfriend, and she’s coming over. Hope that’s cool. Cool? Cool. Alright bye bye now.’

Immediately, you regret offering to text her. Yet, even with your discretion, you begin to type. 

YOU: ‘Hey, just want to let you know I’ll be heading home tomorrow. Probably around early morning.’

YOU:  ‘But Is it okay if I bring a friend down with me?” 

You curse yourself as soon as the word floats into the chat. Friend. 

Shutting off your phone, and tossing it out of your hands, you nod with a not-so reassuring smile. “There.” 

Thankfully, Hazel misses the uncertainty in your expressions and returns an optimistic smile.  “This is exciting, I finally get to meet these parents I've heard so much about.”

You shake your head bemusedly. “Look, there’s a reason I don’t talk about them. I mean, they aren’t exactly the most agreeable people.”

“I’m sure I can handle it.”

“I know you can,” you brush off, as you allow yourself to fall onto the satin sheets. “I’m just not sure I can.” 

“You can. Everything will turn out fine.” She joins you, lying next to your side and taking your hand hers. “Besides, I’m great with parents.”

You smile softly, nuzzling your head into her shoulder. Internally, your heart sinks. How could you not tell your parents about her? Since the second semester of freshman year, she’s been this symbol of comfort in your life. Yet in that same sense, she’s also your girlfriend. So, how could you tell your parents about her? 

You exhale a long, pent-up breath -unaware that, through this spiral, you’ve briefly forgotten to breathe. “I guess I can’t keep you from them forever.”

Hazel lifts her head and leans over you with a smug look. “Forever, you say?”

You laugh upon realizing the implications of your words, and turn away to avoid her demanding stare. “Shut up.” 

“Forever is a long time to be together. Even longer time to go without meeting one’s parents.” 

You shrug, “I think we could get away with it if we tried.”

She perks up, as if having an epiphany of her own. “Oh, maybe we’ll do one of those lavender marriages,” She encourages. “You know, we’ll pretend you're straight, and I’m just some estranged sister-in-law that you inevitably fall in love with -because how could you not? And then, you’ll get divorced, and we’ll run away together, and that way, I’ll never have to officially meet your parents, and they’ll just know me in passing. ”

You pause a moment, mouth set slightly agape at her nonsensical ridicule. “Are you done?”

“I mean, I could keep going, but that’s just a quick summary.”

Pursing your lips, you bite back a broad smile, and bring a hand to her cheek to pull her closer. Leaving a quick peck on her lips, before pressing your forehead to hers, “You’re the worst.”

A giggle reverberates off her chest, and you could swear that sound can kill. “We’ll be fine, I promise. Worst-case scenario, they end up hating me, we elope, move to Barbados, and live happily ever after.”

“Not a bad worst-case scenario.”

“Mhm.” she purrs, placing a hand on your waist and pressing her lips to yours, as you bring a hold to her cheek. The minimal space between your bodies lingers before it begins to diminish; her figure hovering over yours, effectively stabling herself by pressing a leg between your thighs. 

You melt under the touch, allowing the heat to rise to your cheeks and your stomach to do an insurmountable amount of flips. A smile curves against her lips, one that you cannot help but to reciprocate amidst her near suffocating rapture. 

Slicing through the once sensual atmosphere, your phone dings. Breaking away from her embrace, you turn towards your phone on the other side of the bed. “Shit, it’s probably my mom.”

Hazel hums. Though understanding, you can sense a slight disappointment in the way she relaxes next to you onto the bed. 

Swiping open your phone, the message reads:

MOM <3: That’s perfectly fine, hun. Can’t wait to me this friend of yours 😉 

MOM <3: Text me when you leave, love you!

You bite the inside of your cheek, knowing, even through text, she’s aware this friend isn’t like every other. She read you like a book, immediately picking up on the lack of assurance behind your words. She knows if it was just any other friend, you wouldn’t have asked. 

Your mother knows you well, but not well enough to know it isn't a boy you’re bringing home. 

YOU: I will, love you too <3

Shutting off your phone once again, you turn back to Hazel and put on a more heartening expression. “We’re good to go.”

“Really?” she questions. “You didn’t look too sure for a second?”

“Yeah, it’s just- some other stuff she was saying. It’s all good.” 

Hazel quirks her brow, not buying your reasoning.

“Seriously,” You add, wanting to end this questioning as soon as possible. “It’s fine,” You lean in and plant a quipped kiss on her cheek before catapulting yourself off the bed. “I should get packing, though.”

A hand grips your wrist before you can get any further. “No, stay,” she whines. “We were just starting to have fun.”

You gently take your other hand and guide yourself free of her grasp. “As much as I’d love to continue having more fun, you should probably start packing, too.”

Hazel groans, falling onto her back with an exaggeration you found to be quite endearing. 

You feel bad for deceiving her. She should know about the issue surrounding your parents, at least before you arrive at their house mid-afternoon tomorrow. You just didn’t know how to tell her, not that she wouldn’t understand, cause she would. The problem is how it would make her feel. 

Yet, in an undeniably selfish way, you hope that by finally introducing Hazel to your family, this unrelenting guilt entangled in the back of your mind will finally resolve. Maybe, just maybe, telling your parents about your girlfriend would make this thing you have with Hazel feel all the more better. Maybe, just maybe, telling them would allow this already perfect thing to blossom into something better. Maybe, you’ll finally sleep well at night and dream again once more. 

…

Come late morning, around 11 a.m., you and Hazel have already packed your bags and stuffed them in the trunk of your car. Having taken this route home on numerous occasions already, you didn’t bother typing your address into the GPS before setting off. 

Before leaving town and into the interminable country roads, you stopped by a small family owned convenience store for breakfast. You grabbed a pre-packaged blueberry muffin and a small coffee, while Hazel wandered aimlessly around the store with an indecisive contemplation -which is per usual. Ultimately, she meets you at the counter with an energy drink and a ‘freshly made’ breakfast sandwich -also her usual.

You grin teasingly upon seeing her choice. “You spent all that time deciding, just to get what you always do?”

She shrugs defensively, “I was wondering if I should try something new.”

You huff shaking your head, watching as she hands the cashier her card. 

Hopping back into the car, quiet conversation fills the air. Hazel grabs the aux cord and puts on the road-trip playlist she made just the night before. It’s full of songs and bands the two of you share a liking to, most of which you can scream every word to. 

The drive home is beautiful. It’s full of curvy and long countryside roads, and old historical district villages. Although, your favorite part is around the halfway mark of the drive, where the bundles of farmland are located. Here you pass numerous herds of cattle and their calves, all tucked safely behind mesh wire fences. 

Making this drive with Hazel is something you never thought would be so exciting. You felt like a tour guide of sorts, telling her miniscule stories about random experiences you’ve had in the area. Like how you stopped at one particular gas station on the way home once, and swore to never go back again after you had a near scrap fight with a group of opossums. Or how you once got a flat tire on the side of the road, and the only person who stopped to help you was someone fully dressed in drag. .  

“Sometimes I forget you’re from the middle of nowhere.” Hazel comments. 

“It’s not really in the middle of nowhere.”

“Really?” She retorts, giving you an unimpressed look, “Cause I haven’t seen a proper grocery store for miles.”

“What? We passed like fifty Dollar Generals, which around here is like the equivalent of a Whole Foods.”

She laughs lightly. “That’s exactly my point.”

“Don’t worry,” you chaff. “When we get closer to home, things will start looking a little more developed.”

She smiles with a shake of her head, as she looks back out the window. “You know, you never talk much about where you're from, better yet your family.”

You tense, gripping the steering wheel slightly, unsure of what to say.

“Yeah?” 

“Yeah,” Hazel confirms, looking back your way. “How come?”

Her question sounds so innocent, as if she doesn’t know the true extent of where a conversation like this could lead. The two of you have been living in this comfortable bubble for the entirety of its existence. It’s safe here, it’s content. It’s a place where your family can’t come in and hurt you, or even worse, hurt her. 

You’re used to their overtly derogatory teasing, but Hazel isn’t. What if your family steers her away from you, what if she projects their behavior onto you, or starts to perceive you as one of them -they are family after all.  

You finally broke free, went off on your own, and got to choose the people you surround yourself with. Things finally felt like they were in your control. You could keep your family life separate from the one you live away at college. You could keep this perfect balance of family and friends. You could finally separate yourself from your upbringing. But the thought that your family could drive something so perfect out of your life, stressed you out beyond comprehension. 

“Hey,” Hazel interjects, bringing you out of your spiraling thoughts. “You alright?”

“Yeah-uh, sorry.” You reply, anxiously tapping your fingers on the steering wheel. 

“It’s okay” She reassures with kind eyes. “You just kind of spaced out there when I asked about your family. Is everything okay?”

You exhale a long breath. Even feeling the motions of it all and knowing this trip could make or break everything with Hazel, you’re aware that she deserves to know. 

“They don’t know, Haze.” you finally blurt. 

She hesitates a moment. Her expression is evidently confused, as she turns down the music. “Who doesn’t know what?”

“My parents. They don’t know. They don’t know I’m…” For some reason, it’s hard to say. You’ve always been comfortable in your sexuality, so why is it so hard to say it now? 

“Gay?” She finishes for you.”They don’t know you like girls?”

You bite your lip, shaking your head. “I’m so sorry, I should’ve told them sooner -long before I even thought of bringing you to them. Which also should’ve been way sooner. I just didn’t know what to say or how to tell them or-”

“So they’re homophobic?” She interrupts.

You stutter on your words, struggling to form a proper response, before letting out a defeated breath. “Kind of?”

“Kind of?”

“Well, they’re not like homophobic in a way where they think gay people shouldn’t have the right to marry or exist. To them it’s more like, ‘i dont care if you’re gay just don’t do that stuff around me’ kind of way. So they are homophobic, but it’s like…it’s just…” You hesitate, glancing at Hazel’s expression carefully. 

For a moment, she stares at you in bafflement. What she could be thinking appears unreadable -that is, until a small laugh escapes her. 

She’s laughing?

“Hazel,” you sigh. ”It’s not funny. I’m serious.”

“I know, I know. I’m sorry for laughing,” She apologizes with a waving of her hand. “It’s just… I’ve never heard someone describe it that way.”

“Hazel,” You complain, desperately trying to keep your focus on her and the road. 

She purses her lips as she tries to bite back an amused smile. After a deep exhale, she finally regains her composure and meets your weary expression. “Look, it’s fine they don’t know. I get it, it’s hard coming out, especially to people like that. I don’t expect you to tell them right as we walk through the door. Although, I’d love to see such a dramatic proclamation of your love for me, I understand not telling them. So, you don’t have to… for now.”

She pauses for a moment, placing a comforting hand on your forearm. “But I do wish you would’ve told me about them before bringing me all the way out here. I need to like, be more prepared for a situation like this.”

“I know, and I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you before,” you apologize, wishing you would’ve swallowed your transgressions and told her sooner. “You don’t have to do this anymore. If you’re too uncomfortable-”

“No, I want to.” she interjects. “Things will just be a little more awkward, is all. Nothing I can’t handle.”

“No Hazel, you don’t-... this was a bad idea. I should’ve told you-”

“Hey, it’s fine. I’m okay with it, really.” 

You flatten your lips, dissatisfied with how you’ve made things. Her circumstances are unfair, yet she’s still willing to meet them. 

“Are you sure? I can text my mom, cancel the whole thing, and I can just stay with you on campus for spring break. I’ll make it up to you-”

Hazel interrupts with a stern call of your name. “Seriously, it’s fine”

You switch your worried gaze from the dark roadway to Hazel’s pitying stare. You didn’t think it would be possible, but you begin to think you might want to turn around more than Hazel. You’ve finally built up enough courage to offer for them to meet, and a part of you wonders if it’s for the best, if the timing is even right. 

“It’s just…my relationship with my family is complicated. They’re not… easy people to get along with. I don’t want them to make you feel uncomfortable. I don’t want them to say some dumb shit and hurt you. I don’t want them to ruin things between us. And I’m scared that after this, things between us will change. That you’ll see me differently, like I’m one of them, and want to leave. And, honestly, Hazel, these past few months with you have been really really amazing and I don’t want to lose that …I don’t want to lose you.”

Hazel is silent for a long moment, seemingly mulling something over in her head. And with each passing moment, you get more nervous that she had changed her mind and did, in fact, want to turn around and leave you with your family troubles.

“Pull over,” She suddenly demands.

“What?” 

“Pull over, I want to give you a hug.” She implores with a strange sophistication in her words. “And because you’re crying and probably shouldn’t be driving.”

You hadn’t even realized it before, but tears were streaming down your cheeks, your voice was hoarse, and your vision was far too blurry to be driving in the dark. 

You wipe your tears abashedly with a weak laugh, and pull over onto the side of the empty highway. Shifting the vehicle into park, Hazel’s arms immediately wrap around your shoulders -the unwarranted comfort making you fall apart at the seams. All in one fell swoop, everything comes crashing down. 

You tuck your head between her shoulder and neck, desperately attempting to suppress the lump in your throat. Her affection is warm and safe. To you, her embrace isn’t a new feeling, yet, it’s still somehow refreshing. Like a much-needed breath of fresh air, or a sip of ice water on a hot day. 

“You’re not going to lose me because of them. Nothing they say or do will ever change how I feel about you, alright?” she whispers over your shoulder. 

You nod, unsure if you can trust your own voice. 

She let's go, placing a small peck on your cheek. Her palms cradle your face as she stares into your eyes. “Everything is going to work out just fine. And if it doesn’t, we’ll leave. Simple as that.”

You nod once more, hating how speechless you feel. Here she was, sacrificing her spring break to meet your homophobic parents, yet she’s the one comforting you. 

“Alright. Now, switch seats with me. I’m driving now.”

Not even bothering to argue, you unbuckle your seatbelt and open the driver door. 

You type in your address into the GPS, and allow Hazel to take the wheel. 

…

Pulling into the rocky driveway, your heart’s in your ears and there’s a knot in your stomach. If the prolonged carsickness from the car ride didn’t make you throw up, walking through that front door surely will. 

Hazel puts the car in park and turns the ignition off. “You okay?”

You stare at the dash, eyes glued straight ahead and you nod slowly. 

A hand grabs yours, squeezing it three times over, a gesture you have yet to understand but never fails to ease your racing heart. Glancing at this impossibly calm and collected girl next to you, you wonder how you ever got so lucky to be a part of her world. It seems nearly inconceivable. She’s too good to be true, too good for you. 

Flashing a weak smile, you open the passenger door and step out into the cold air. 

The sun has set into darkness, as the crickets chirp in a harmonious choir. One thing you did miss about home were the quiet nights. Compared to the college town, where police sirens were an atmospheric staple and the oxygen is thick with pollution, your hometown was silent. Everything could be heard throughout the still nights, including your favorite calls of the mourning dove. 

You ultimately decide to leave your bags in the car, figuring you’ll grab them after dinner, which is supposedly ready according to the text your mom sent ten minutes prior to your arrival. So, not wanting them to wait another moment to eat, the two of you walk to the front door. 

Typically, when you visit home, you barge through the door, not bothering to announce yourself. It’s your home after all. But this time, being so filled with nerves, you knock. 

“Come in,” your mother's voice beckons from inside, followed by the excited barking of the family dog. 

The moment you open the door, two paws meet your abdomen. “Hey, buddy,” You shakily greet, ruffling the dog's head, as his tail wags excitedly. 

“Hazel, this is Ru,” You introduce sliding off your shoes. 

Ru is the name everyone decided on, and the one you came up with. Though you never had the heart to tell your family you named him after Rupaul. But it’s funnier if they don’t know. 

“Hi Ru,” Hazel coos, squatting to the pups level, allowing him to sniff her hand, to which he immediately accepts. Originally, your family wanted a guard dog. Instead they got Ru, who wouldn't hurt a fly.

“Aren’t you just the sweetest?” Hazel laughs, flopping his ears. Already you could tell the dog loved her. Seeing her with Ru, both of them lighting up at the interaction, made things feel slightly better, like everything might turn out alright.

“Hey, hun!” Your mom greets, rounding the entrance corner, her arms open wide. 

“Hi,” You put on your best smile while wrapping your arms around her, using every last piece of willpower to suppress the nerves. 

“Missed you,” she reminds, pulling away before her gaze quickly drifts to the girl behind you. 

“Mom, this is Hazel.”

Something falters behind your mother's stare, and in an instant you notice her subtle surprise. Indeed, not a boy.

“Hi, nice to meet you,” Hazel stands, offering her hand.

“Nice to meet you,” She shakes her hand briefly with a smile, then turns back to you. “Where are your bags?”

“Oh, we left them in the car. Didn’t want to hold up dinner any longer, you know?”

“You didn’t have to do that,” she brushes off, as she saunters back to the kitchen, “But after dinner, I’ll send your father out there to help you unload all your stuff.”

“Speaking of which, where is he?” You ask, gesturing for Hazel to follow you further into the home. 

Your mother scoffs, grabbing the plates from the pantry. “Bathroom, you know how he is.”

“Gross, I’m eating.” A voice calls from the dining table. 

You peek your head around the corner to find your sister, who not surprisingly didn’t wait for your arrival to eat. “Good to see you too.” You tease.

She nods, her mouth full of food. 

Looking at the stove, you find fresh cooked salmon, cubed baked sweet potatoes, and charred asparagus. If there is a second thing you missed about home, it’s the home-cooked meals. 

“Dinner looks good, mom.” You smile, grabbing a plate for both you and Hazel. 

“Thank you,” She chirps, filling her plate and looking at Hazel who has been shadowing your side. “Please, help yourselves to whatever.”

“Thank you so much,” Hazel lightly mutters, joining your side to fill her plate. “And thank you for having me. I know it’s last minute.” 

“No worries. It’s always nice to have a new guest.” 

Finally taking a seat at the table, Hazel sits by your side. You could tell she was being overly conscious of how close she sat next to you. Despite knowing she only wanted to avoid unwanted attention, you couldn’t help but feel disappointed. Her comforting presence is an inescapable desire, one that you cannot have -not here. 

“You know, when you said a friend, they thought you were finally bringing home a boy.” your sister ridicules from the seat across from you. 

A distaste for your sister settles on your tongue. Of course that was the first thing she’s said since you arrived. It didn’t matter that it was a diss towards you. What mattered was how Hazel glanced in your direction -a mix of dejection and pity- it killed you. 

“Well…” you begin, unsure of how to respond to such a remark. “It's best not to assume things, is it?”

Her eyes flare with amusement, indicating she wasn’t expecting a defensive remark. It wasn’t like you to respond in such a way, but these are different circumstances.

Without introduction, your father walks in with his plate in hand. On his way to his seat, he plants a small pat on your shoulder. “Good to see you home for once.”

You smile flatly. Every time you visited home, the subject of your frequent absence was always brought up. Even with the easy drive home, Christmas and Spring break were the only times of year that you ever visited home. 

“Um,” You clear your throat, “Dad, this is Hazel.”

Directing his attention to the girl, he offers a curt nod. “So, what are you majoring in Hazel?”

Mentally, you roll your eyes, because of course that’s his first question. 

“Uh, engineering, sir.”

His expression lightens, “Really? That’s a pretty good one, make a lot of money in that field.”

“Yeah, definitely. But it’s very competitive, so we’ll see how it goes.” 

“I’m sure you’ll do great.” Your mom chimes in, as she takes a seat next to your sister. 

Hazel smiles warmly, “Thank you.” 

“Hazel actually got a perfect score last semester on her Calculus three final,” You bud in, trying desperately to keep a conversation floating.  

“Wow, calculus, huh?” your dad replies, evidently impressed. “How’d you pull that off?”

“Well, I’m pretty accustomed to the formulas by now. I’ve been working with this sort of thing ever since I joined the fight club in high school and made…” She pauses, reconsidering her story. “I just helped everyone with their calculus homework, really.”

“Wait, did you say fight club?” Your sister adds. “Like the Brad Pitt movie?”

“Yeah -um, it wasn’t necessarily a fight club, more like a self-defense club. You know, for female solidarity and stuff.” 

“Oh, well that’s very cool,” Your mom comments. “You know, we made y/n take a self-defense class before going to college.”

“Really?” Hazel questions, eyes lightening with surprise as she turns to you.

“Mhm,” your mother grins proudly. “best of her class.”

“What? Why did I never know this?” 

You shrug with the first genuine smile you’ve mustered since the night began. “I don’t know, I never thought to mention it.”

She lightly laughs, making your nerves ease ever so slightly. 

The night goes on as the conversation picks up. Hazel and your family exchange  stories, jokes, and current happenings in their lives. Things are looking up, you think. Dinner has long been eaten, and no one has even bothered to move from the table. The earlier tension has finally dissolved into an air of comfortability, and your nerves have finally settled into an ease. As far as you could tell, your family has found a liking for Hazel.

You made a deal with yourself.  Before spring break ends, you’d indefinitely tell them. The only question is, how would you find the proper timing? Things are going so well now, what if telling them ruins it? 

Eventually, Hazel excuses herself, discreetly asking you for directions to the bathroom. You stood, grabbing both your plates and pointing her in the general direction down the hall. 

 Discarding the plates into the dishwasher, you return to your seat on the table, hazel now absent from your side. Without her comforting presence, the energy seems to shift in the room. There is a thick silence among your family. For a moment, you can’t tell if it’s all in your head. Although, almost in an instant, your earlier hopes for a peaceful spring break dispel into thin air.  

“So, your friend Hazel.” Your sister begins. 

You look up expectantly, awaiting some derogatory remark with deep trepidation. 

“She’s got a personality, doesn’t she?”

You narrow your eyes, “What does that mean?” 

“She’s just different is all.” 

“Yeah but what does that mean?” You ask once more with impatience, eyes darting between each of your family members, looking for some unknown answer. 

“She just means,” Your mother adds, “She’s a lot more different from your other friends. She’s…”

“Funny,” Your dad finishes, though it’s not a compliment. It’s a passive tone, one you know all too well. 

“Funny?”

Your sister shrugs. “Yeah. I mean, the way she dresses, her hair, her humor. It’s all just different from what we’re used to.” 

“So…You don’t like her?” you question with a twinge of hurt. Wherever this is going, you dread it. That same tangled ball of nerves in your stomach have finally resurfaced, and all it took was for Hazel to leave the room. 

Your dad scoffs, “You know that's not what we’re saying, y/n. “ 

“Yeah we like her she’s just-”

“Different, yeah I got it. You don’t have to say it a million times.”

“You don’t have to get so defensive about it. It’s not that big of a deal,” Your sister remarks with a condescending laugh, “I mean, what? Are we not allowed to talk about her?”

“Not the moment she leaves the room, no. That’s fucking weird and condescending.”

“Hey!” Your dad warns. “Watch your mouth.”

You feel at a loss for words. Everything is escalating so fast. From what you observed, everyone was having a good time. Why do they have to go and ruin it? How could they be so insolent? 

“I don’t see why you’re getting so defensive about her though?” Your sister adds. “It’s not like we’re saying anything bad.”

“No, but you’re making passive comments, and I can tell what you’re actually thinking, and it hurts my feelings that you think that way.”

“Oh god forbid we hurt your feelings,” Your father claims. 

The hurt is soon replaced with anger, as your father’s remark seeps into your skin. After all these years of growing up with them by your side, you’ve never seen them so… ugly. You knew they weren’t the most agreeable people, but this was a whole new side.  “Why would you-”

“We’re sorry, honey,“ Your mom interrupts. “We don’t mean to upset you. You’re right, it’s rude to talk about someone when they're out of the room.”

You give her a disbelieving look. “It doesn’t matter if she’s here or not! The stuff you're saying still sucks, and it’s weird, and all of you are being rude.”

“Oh my god, we aren’t even saying anything bad! We just said she’s different from your other friends.” Your sister complains. 

You groan, “Yeah and you keep saying different and not actually elaborating on what you mean.” 

“Y/n, honey, calm down.”

“No! I wanna know what does ‘different’ mean? What does that mean to you?”

A subtle silence envelopes the air, a heavy, understanding silence. You aren’t mad because you don’t understand what they’re saying; You're mad because you do. You want to hear them say it. You need to hear them say it. 

“You know what we mean,” Your sister finally confides. 

It takes everything in you to not burst at the seams. Can they not even say it? Was it that hard for them? 

“Why can’t all of you just be… supportive, unconditionally.”

Your dad shakes his head, “Why does it matter what we think anyway?” 

“Because, she’s my girlfriend!” You cry. The moment the words finally reveal themselves, a weight is lifted off your chest.

The room falls silent, their faces painted with complete bewilderment.

“We’ve been together for five months now. And I didn’t want to tell you guys because I knew you would react this way, and I knew you wouldn’t understand, or in the very least, even try to. But it turns out, I don’t even need to tell you she’s my girlfriend for all of you to absolutely lose your shit! I mean, you’re my family for Christ's sake! I just wish you’d be a little more supportive, or at least have a heart when I tell you i’m…I-” The rest of your words fail to fall from your mouth, as they bubble up behind the lump forming in your throat. 

They give no response, not even one from your father to correct your language. They simply stare, and it’s an unbearable silence, one that fills you with an impending dread. One that holds the weight of all that is unspoken. One that says absolutely nothing, yet everything all at once. 

Maybe it’s disgust or maybe it’s shock, yet the uncertainty of their expressions remains. All that can be certain is the very fact that you can’t be here anymore.  

Though, all you can manage to do is study their contemplative stares. You study them with a pained glare til your eyes drift to the hall, where Hazel stands in the entrance. You don’t know how long she’s been there, but with her sympathetic yet ultimately, disappointed expression, you presume she's been there long enough. Now, only one thought floats through your mind: Hazel shouldn’t have to be here.

You abruptly stand from the table and pace out the door.  “Thank you for dinner,” You mutter, as you grab your keys and wallet off the counter. You take Hazel’s hand without meeting her eyes, and usher her out the door. 

Faintly, you hear your mother call out from the kitchen, though her voice only mumbles under the rumbling thoughts in your head. 

It’s funny, you thought the worst response would be one of disapproval. But it turns out, no response is worse. With no words spoken, you don’t know what they’re thinking. Sure, the silence is enough to make you want to curl up inside yourself and disappear, but you can’t tell if it was shock or dismay. 

Before you can open the driver door, Hazel cuts in front of you, giving a knowing look. She was going to drive, no questions asked. And you had no energy left to argue, so without another word, you hop in the passenger seat and tuck your knees to your chest, holding back the fountain of tears that threaten to spill. 

As the car leaves the neighborhood, Hazels sits behind the wheel with the same face as before. You don’t know if the disappointment in her eyes is for you or your family. Or maybe it’s both, being of the same blood and all. You are them, and they are you; they are you, and you are them. It doesn’t matter either way, because they’re family. And when you needed their approval most, they chewed it up and spit it out.

They’re the people that are supposed to support you most, they’re supposed to love you unconditionally. But when it comes to a love that is unconventional to them, all that goes out the window. Maybe simply being their daughter wasn’t enough.

All these interminable, chastising thoughts suddenly come to a halt, when the hand that’s been anxiously gripping your shin, is pulled away.  Your eyes drift upward to find Hazel’s hand intertwined in yours. Her eyes are glued to the road in such a steadfast way, you begin to wonder if she’s even paying attention to her driving. She seemed out of it, lost in her own world. Til, she flips on the blinker and makes the turn out of your hometown.

[dragonmama76]

Working on part 2 of Beginnings, but until then here’s a small interlude. You can read the first bit here Part One

“Are you excited to start high school?” Steve feels like every lame adult he’s ever known, but he’s been wanting to have this conversation for a while now, preferably before his gang of nerds walk unprepared into his alma mater.

“I mean, sure.” Dustin says. “They have an amazing media lab and the AP science teachers are supposed to be really good. It’s never too early to think about college! Uh, sorry Steve.”

“Alright, shut it. If I had a brain like yours maybe I’d be in college now.” Steve rolls his eyes affectionately.

“And I heard Nancy say there’s an after-school club for D&D, so that might be okay. I mean, it won’t be as good without Will there but…” Mike trails off, a frown settling on his face.

“Yeah, okay I guess your demons and dingbats thing could be good.” Steve feels vaguely uneasy. Something to do with that club...it probably doesn't matter.

“Well, I’m also trying out for the basketball team.” Lucas adds softly.

“My man!!” Steve grins and holds his hand up for a high five. “I’m around if you want to get some practice in before tryouts. And I've got an in with the coach if you want me to put in a good word for you.”

“Nice! I'm always up for more practice!" Lucas grins back matching Steve's enthusiasm.

"And nepotism," retorts Dustin.

"Okay, brain boy. I don't know what that is, but it sounds gross and we don't have it." Steve smirks and cocks his head before remembering this was supposed to be a serious conversation.

"Anyway...I just wanted to talk to you guys about sticking together and always having each-other's backs." Steve starts and Dustin, of course interrupts, "Obviously, Steve. Who do you think we are?"

"No, man, I know. It's just that it can be pretty intimidating and the bullying can be...more intense than what you're used to in Middle School." Steve conceeds.

"Like you'd know anything about being bullied!" snorts Mike, "You were the bully."

"Uh...well." Steve doesn't want to scare the kids, but he does want them to be prepared. "I was kind of an asshole for a while..."

"Ya think?" Dustin chimes in.

"Shut up and let me talk!" Steve says in his best mom voice. "I had to learn to be harder in school. My freshman year this older kid made me his target and it was pretty awful. It got so bad I didn't even want to go to school half the time."

"That really sucks, man." Lucas gives Steve a supportive look.

"Aw, what, did he call you names? Make fun of your hair?" Mike sneers. He can't help but run his mouth sometimes. He likes Steve well enough, but not like Dustin and Lucas do and he can't stand how they worship him sometimes. Steve isn't that great.

"Dude. He pulled a knife on me for like, no reason. I was fourteen."

"Woah" Dustin just exhales. "So like, is high school....dangerous?" All three boys are seriously paying attention now, eyes wide.

"Nah, not normally. Anyway, it got better once I was deep in with the guys on the basketball team. So I'm just saying. Find a group that has your back. And you guys look out for other kids too, all right? And tell ME if anyone bothers you. I've got a bat that can sort them out."

"Dude....you can't just nailbat a teenager." Dustin snorts.

"I dunno, squirt," Steve ruffles Dustin's hair and he yelps ducking away, "If I find out anyone is messing with you guys....well, maybe not the nail bat, but just...promise to tell me okay? I don't want anyone of you going through what I did."

"We promise." They all chime dutifully.

"Hellfire!" Mike shouts as they all turn to look at him like he's got three heads. "What?" he says, "That's the name of the club."

"Hellfire." Steve mutters. Why does that name make his stomach hurt? He'll probably remember later. Meanwhile he's glad his twerps are going to have a good support system when they start school.

Read Part One, Part Two, Part Three

Tag list (ask if you want to be tagged for the full part 2) @swimmingbirdrunningrock @phirex22 @lilpomelito @thaliaisalesbian

[twstfanblog]

*~Murder Movie Madness~* PT 1

A/N: YO! Super excited to finally share this fic with you guys!!!! You get two parts in quick succession and another two tomorrow before the final part on Halloween! Enjoy the fic! Word Count: 2K Pairings: First-year poly minus Ortho and Yuu Warnings: Swearing, Me typing out a country accent

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5

A dear server friend, @transguydeuce was able to draw art for this! It'll be at the ending of this part and I'm so excited for everyone to see how amazing their art is!!!

Yuu hadn't realized they didn't know of any of the horror movies of Twisted Wonderland, not until their second Halloween was coming up.  A choice of movie for reviewing that week during the Film Research club was vetoed. Every other member saying the movie was ‘too scary’.

While the easiest and most obvious answer would be to ask Vil or even Idia for recommendations. They instead went the fun route and invited their Firstie group to a movie madness marathon. Each freshman was tasked with bringing a copy of their favorite horror movie for judgment. By the end of the marathon, they'd all vote on who's movie was scariest. A contest that Yuu wasn't shy on already claiming victory over. Something that had Epel already seething and stating he was going to find a movie so scary that Yuu was going to actually cry during it.

Soon their movie night approached, Ramshackle's lounge area was decked out with spooky and kooky Halloween decoractions. The large square-shaped coffee table filled to the brim with snacks and drinks for the coming marathon. Grim was pacified from wrecking the area in a tantrum, allowed to eat a bit of each snack before making his way to Ignihyde to play whatever games he could whine Idia into letting him try. Yuu always found it funny that the dire beast loved hearing stories and playing video games, but he couldn't stand to sit still for a movie.

Epel, Deuce, and Ace had been first to arrive, bringing more snacks and carrying disks of movies. They all sat around the lounge, waiting for the other three of their group to arrive. Deuce had sat at the disk player, Ace leaned over his back and nitpicking at every little adjustment the other card soldier made to the screen display. Epel placed himself on a floor cushion, already dipping into the bowl of melted marshmallows and chocolate with a graham cracker cookie the Heartslabyul duo had brought as a gift from Trey.

The Pomefiore student threw a smug little smirk over his shoulder at Yuu taking up an entire couch for herself, “The movie ah brought is gonna scare yur pants off. Picked from a list of recommendations from Vil and everythin’. He even gave me money to spring for the best versions an' cuts.”

Yuu smiled from their place, raising an eyebrow and reaching over his head to grab a handful of colorful caramel popcorn, “Says the fucker who made me turn off Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory-”

“That tunnel scene was fucked and ya know it…”

“Still don't know what you're talking about.” Yuu smiled, rolling their eyes and turning away from a fuming Epel laughing under their breath, “I don't know what you're talking about, there wasn't a tunnel in that movie.”

“Stop gaslighting me-” Epel took a breath, calming himself and eating his cookie before it dripped any more of the sticky mixture down his hand. Chewing thoughtfully, Epel pointed at Yuu and spoke when his mouth was clear, “Shut ya whore mouth. Ah asked Vil specifically what were the scariest movies he knew of to make ya eat ya words.”

He shoved the disk container into Yuu's face, explaining the movie plot while she looked at the cover. It was, painfully basic in Yuu's opinion, though they could find little details that made it interesting. The title of ‘Haunting Grounds’ was across the top in a stylized font, a group of stereotypical teens or college kids were all squished onto a couch with various expressions of fear and terror holding bright red party cups. A weird scene but the more Yuu looked at the cover the more they found had been snuck in to show it was a horror film. Blood leaking from under the couch, the slash marks along the back walls, How roughed up the people looked, the ominous figure silhouetted in the center behind the group seen from the illuminated bay window.

Epel tapped at the case, black painted nails tapping at an out-of-place red dot in the corner of the cover, “With the extra funds Vil gave me, Ah was even able to get the immersive copy. We gotta watch it first and really get the scene set for the rest of them.”

“Gotta set dress for a shit show, huh?”

Sebek, Jack, and Ortho arrived to the scene of Epel and Yuu rolling around on the floor fighting, the two smaller freshmen spitting insults at each other. Soon, everyone was seated and picking at the spread of snacks while Deuce gave the disk player a final check as he prepared each movie to play back to back so that no one would have to get up.

Ortho held out his hand, smiling with his eyes toward Epel, “Epel Felimer, may I see the disk case you brought? I wish to look at the reviews for the movies tonight!”

With the case in hand, Ortho had only just loaded the movie overview before his eyes caught the red dot at the corner of the case. His eyes widen, stuttering slightly, “O-oh! Epel Felimer, I don't have an issue with it but have the others agreed to engage in such an experience?”

“Huh?” Seeing Ortho hold up the case and point to the dot he smirked once again. “Oh yeah. Don't worry. Ah got the green light from Vil on how good this movie is. The immersion feature is just to scare us a bit more.”

“...” Ortho's brows furrowed down, an air of seriousness so deadly it made everyone around the couch pause, “Epel Feilmer, a pink dot is immersive, a red dot means interactive.”

“...Fuck.” Epel whipped back around, a knee braced against the coffee table as he tried to pull Deuce back, “DEUCE, WAIT-”

“Huh-”  Deuce had turned around, his questioning tone cut short as his finger pressed the play button and the room went dark.

As their eyes suddenly snapped open, Yuu was painfully aware that the sun fucking hurt to look at, “Oh God, the fuck? It's like 8pm, why is the sun out-where am I? Hello!?”

They looked around in disbelief, Sage Island was just dipping into Fall, leaves turning crunchy and temperatures dropping by the day. Instead, they found themselves in lush summer grasses, tall and leafy trees in almost nauseatingly hot air. They look down, seeing their comfortable fall loungewear replaced by a simple V-neck tucked into denim capri pants and sneakers. Feeling something against their skin, they pulled a necklace tucked under their shirt out to find a heart-shaped locket with a photo of a completely different woman with an older man.

“What the fuck…?”

“YUU!? CAN YOU HEAR ME!?”

“Ace!?”

The woods weren't as big as they had seemed. Only a few steps and they found Ace and Sebek standing in a clearing, the other freshmen looking just as confused and in different clothes as well.

Ace was dressed sensibly, minus the open-toed sandals and layered top of a plain t-shirt and a comedically printed unbuttoned shirt. A baseball cap with several pins on it was a few feet away, no doubt supposed to be Ace’s.

Sebek…was in a sweater vest. The argyle top seemed to be too small yet fit him perfectly, he even had a little bowtie. Paired with pressed khaki shorts, matching knee socks and hiking boots, Yuu had to physically stop themselves from giving the half-fae a wedgie and demanding whatever money he had on his person.

The half-fae was awkward, standing as though he knew if he moved too fast the clothing would rip apart at its seams, “...This feels tight. I can tell it's not but it feels tight.”

Yuu placed a hand over their mouth but removed it to speak, “I wanna beat you up so bad right now.”

“I think I'd let you…”

Ace was looking around the treeline, hoping to spot another one of their group, “Juice!? Epel!? Jack!? You guys ok!?”

A familiar hulking figure comes from the bush. Jack was in a striped tank top, cargo shorts, hiking boots, and a varsity jacket tied around his waist. The closer he got, Yuu was able to see he had leather bracelets on each wrist and big gaudy ring on his right hand.

Ace looked at his boyfriend confused, pointing to something in his hands, “Where the fuck did you get a football?”

Jack looked down, only now seeming to realize he had a football in hand, “I…I don't…know…” He turned and threw the ball away, opening his mouth to speak only for everyone to jolt at the sound of Epel yelling in pain.

Sebek was already halfway through the trees, Jack hot on his heels with Yuu and Ace close behind, “Epel! Remain where you are! We are coming to you!”

The country boy was on the ground, the football beside him as he groaned and held his hands over his face. Sebek reached him first but stood back, a faint blush on his cheeks.

Jack stopped short too, looking at Epel's outfit with confused eyes, “O-oh…”

Epel glared at his boyfriends, standing up of his own accord as Ace and Yuu arrived to the other clearing, “Yeah, no, Ah'm fine. Ah'll get my own damn self up. Just got hit in the damn eyes with a ball and-...”

Yuu covered their mouth again, trying to fight the laughter struggling to escape them. Epel was basically in a bikini of an outfit. A small, brightly colored halter top that showed off his midriff, stark white booty shorts that had a rhinestone decal of a butterfly, and slightly heeled strappy sandals. Yuu also couldn't help but notice he even had a few thick metal bangles on.

“...” Epel gestured to himself, his voice coming out so loudly and angry that it was almost impossible to tell what he had just screamed, “WHO CHANGED ME INTO THIS!?”

Ace shrugged, looking Epel up and down with a slight smile, “I mean, it’s not bad.” “My damn ass is hanging out!” Epel tried to pull the shorts down, growing more frustrated as the shorts either showed more of the top bands of a thong he was wearing or pulling them up to have the bottom of his asschecks exposed

Jack tilted his head a bit, his ears pivoting around before he turned his head away, “I mean- Wait, I hear Deuce.”

“Where is he?”

“Guys!?” A rustle from bushes pulls their attention, the spade soldier walking out of the brush and into the clearing while pulling leaves out of his hair.

Deuce was in loose jean shorts, the edges frayed and a nearly see-through white button-up that was opened enough to show off his collarbones and top of his pecs. As he walked closer, Yuu noted that his skin was glistening and he had on a shark tooth necklace.

He was wiping at his exposed forearms and legs, a look of disgust on his face at the feeling on his skin, “I’m…I’m like oiled up. Is anyone else covered in oil? Why am I covered in oil?”

Sebek huffed lightly, gesturing to everyone else’s clothing before pointing at his own, “Why am I dressed this way but you all have decent wear for the environment?”

Epel scowled toward the taller boy, “Decent?”

Jack’s ears folded back, turning back to the group with a look of worry on his face, “I can’t hear Ortho.”

… The group descended back into a momentary panic, each of them breaking off into the woods screaming out for their last lost member.

They were on an island. At the very least it was in the middle of a lake and not an ocean like Ace had feared before Jack and Sebek were able to point out faint buildings in the distance. Epel had pointed out a boat speeding away from the island at a different shore. Running over (Epel annoyingly managing to nearly trip over every exposed root) they all shouted and tried to wave down an old man scowling at them to turn back around. He yelled back at them, shaking his hook hand at them, “I WARNED YA! I WARNED YA! I HOPE YUR CURSED JUST LIKE HE WAS!”

“COME BACK !?” Yuu sighed, holding their hands up to the sky as if to question the heavens, “Why the fuck are we here if this place is cursed!? Epel, your movie sucks!”

“Don't ya fucking blame this shit on me, ya COW-”

Jack’s ears were pressed to his head, dread starting to fill the other firsties while Epel and Yuu fought in the sand beside them, “Oh Seven, we’re in the movie…”

LOOK AT THIS! I love how they draw so much and Im so happy I got them to draw the firstie's outfits. Just imagine them in these the whole time honestly.

[lagataprrr]

Blame it on the Club's Playlist| Chapter 2 Hey Baby (Drop it to the Floor)

S. Gojo x plus!size fem reader

Warnings: slight dry humping, heavy makeout session, heavy petting, fingering, multiple orgasms mentioned, car sex, Gojo being completely obsessed with reader, readers insecurities maybe getting the best of her

Blame it on the Club's Playlist | Masterlist

Credits to @super-marvel-dc for the gojo divider!!! They have more on their profile🥹

a/n: PART 2!!! thank you to the sweet messages and comments about wanting to be added to the taglist. This one is a little longer and you'll see that the song isn't made too much of like a deal as the previous but that was on purpose swearrrr. ANYways, I hope y'all love it, part three is already in the works as well.

Also! Y/F/D = Your favorite drink just in case anyone was wondering.

Strong hands gripping your thigh, your back arching as you let out a high pitched moan. The euphoric feeling of his warm tongue going in and out of your gushing hole making tingles run through your entire body, your toes curling and the knot in your lower belly tightening. You were about to cum, the feeling making you tremble, your thighs threatening to close.

"Gonna cum for me, pretty girl?" His words vibrating against your clit. Moving his lips to suck on that sensitive bundle of nerves.

"O-Oh ngh, fuck-"

BEEP BEEP BEEP

You jolted awake, your old college sweatshirt sticking to your skin from the sweat that had broken out on your body. The feeling of your underwear so moist and sticking to you made you cringe.

You had another wet fucking dream about him. It's only been about six days since you had gone to the club with your friends. Six days since you had gotten head from that really hot man in the VIP area. Six days since you practically ran away from what could have been the best fuck of your life. Letting out a sigh, you pushed the duvet off you. Your feet touching the cold hardwood floors of your room, as you walked into the bathroom. Stripping off your clothes and turning on the shower faucet, waiting for the water to be as cold as can be. The ice cold water brought a sort of relief to you scalding skin.

It's like ever since Satoru ate you out he left your skin on fire. You can't even forget the way his fingers dragged over your thighs. His mouth on you branding its way into your very core.

Your cunt practically throbbed at the thought of him, a pulsating sensation on your clit making you bite your lower lip. Shaking your head and lathering your body in your coconut soap. The rest of your shower spent on thinking of Satoru.

♡

"Oh come on, you have to come with us tomorrow!" Your friend whined, her grip on your hand tight.

"You have to go and get your man." Your other friend pointed out.

"Absolutely not. I've already embarrassed myself enough." You mutter, your eyes reading over the homework instructions on your laptop screen. Slipping your hand out of your friends grasp to quickly type something in your blank google doc.

Your friends roll their eyes. "He ate you out, he was clearly into you." your eyes widened, looking around the library, to see if anyone had heard your very loud friend.

"For christ sake. Do not keep saying that shit, we're in public."

"Well you were in public too, you know." Your friend pouts and you slap her shoulder. "I'm just saying, you didn't really care."

You shook your head at her antics, typing away. Your other friend giggled, scrolling away on social media. "Just leave her, if she doesn't want to hang out with us its her decision."

You gasp. "It is not because I don't want to hang out."

Your other friend lets out a pout. "You're right, she doesn't wanna hang out with us."

You slumped your shoulders. Knowing they were teasing, and the little voice in the back of your head begging for you to just take a chance. Go with them. Maybe finish what was started. But the other voice, the opposite of this one, denied it. Saying that you shouldn't. You would just embarrass yourself.

But then again, maybe just try? It's not like he's going to be there again right? You can just go, dance, have a few shots again and just have fun with your friends. You're not going because of Satoru. You're going because you just want to hang out with your friends.

Chewing on your bottom lip, pondering, your friends exchanged looks. Already knowing that they would come with you back to your apartment to get ready.

After a few quiet minutes, you turned back to the both of them. "Fine. I'll come with."

Your friends immediately squeal in delight, only for the librarian to come around the corner and shush them loudly. Closing your laptop and stuffing it into your bag. "Okay, I am leaving before the librarian kicks me out because of you two." Your friends laughing as you walked out. Heading down the campus square to the small cafe shop you've accustomed yourself to go too whenever you wanted to be alone. The little bell on the glass door chiming, and immediately your met with the buzzing of students talking amongst themselves, and the smell of freshly brewed coffee and sweet pastries baked in the early morning. Getting in line, you pull out your phone, scrolling through social media and answering a couple of messages you've missed when your ears perk up at a table that was a few feet away.

"You're so lame Suguru, we could be doing anything right now. But you just want to be doing this stupid project." Glancing up to see a mop of familiar white hair and wide back. The tall body fit into the small chair of the cafe table. You felt your stomach drop as you recognized him.

"If we get this over with, we'll have the entire weekend to be free, Satoru." His friend with dark locks sat across from him reminded, crossing his arms over his chest as he leaned back on his own chair. The white-haired man in front of him groaning and throwing his head back, making you panic, turning your head to look elsewhere.

Would he recognize you? No, no he wouldn't. You're not dolled up like you were that night. You're wearing a pair of comfy leggings and a way oversized hoodie, that sort of makes you look a little bigger than you normally are, and your comfy socks covered by your tan colored crocs. Your hair pinned up in a sort of bun, that you were sure your hair was probably falling out of.

"I can take your order now ma'am." Your attention was ripped away to the smiling cashier, which you recognized was a classmate from a class from your last semester. You stepped towards the counter and gave her a small smile. "Hey Y/N, good to see you!"

Forgetting the white haired man sitting a few feet away, you nodded at the cashier in acknowledgement. "Good to see you too. I hope your semester is going well."

"It is. What can I get for you today?"

"Can I have Y/F/D and a cheese danish, please?" The cashier nods, inputting your order into the register. Tapping your student id against the reader, and grabbing the pastry you stepped to the side awaiting for your drink to be prepared.

Engrossed in your phone for a few minutes till your name was called. "Y/N, your drinks is ready." You smiled and thanked the cashier, grabbing the drink and heading out of the cafe.

Completely unaware of a pair of striking blue eyes that would not leave you not even as you walked out of the building, following your figure till you disappeared.

"So I'm going to assume that's her." Suguru says, staring at his best friends dumbfounded face.

Turning his head back at the raven haired man. "Huh?"

"Y/N. The girl you met last Friday that you will not shut up about." He says, taking a sip of his oi cha green tea. "The one you met last Friday? You know the one that ran away from you-"

"Yes, yes thats her. No need to rehash her running away from me." Satoru groans, slumping in the chair with a pout.

"She saw you when she came in."

Satoru sat up at this, his eyes widening. "She did?" A grin forming on his lips.

"Yeah. Saw your dumbass, and turned away. Thought she was gonna run again." Suguru teased and Satoru pouted. "I'm just kidding, man. Look, for all you know maybe she's just shy."

Satoru groaned, laying his head on his open notebook. His cheek squished against the page, creasing the paper making Suguru roll his eyes. Tapping his pen on Satoru's head. "Your creasing your pages."

"Why do you think she ran out on me?"

"Maybe you gave her bad head."

Satoru was quick to lift his head and glare at him. "Excuse you, she came twice, in a row. So no. It can't be." Suguru laughed, shaking his head. Satoru glaring at him as he closed his notebook and stuffing it carelessly in his bag, Suguru doing the opposite.

"Anyways, I don't know man. Maybe she is shy, or she freaked out."

"About what? I was clearly into her, I mean fuck. She was perfect."

Suguru could practically see heart eyes on his best friends face. An uncommon look for him, since usually he's a one and done kind of guy. "What you in love or something?"

"What? No. I'm just saying she was just so pretty. Well, is."

Suguru hums, walking beside his tall friend. The sun illuminating the square nicely across campus, students moving to the dorms and others to their cars.

"You going to the club again tomorrow?" Suguru asks, and Satoru shrugs.

"I don't know. My new Digimon game I ordered arrives tomorrow." He grins and receives a smack to the back of his head.

"Stop being such a idiot, and go to the club. I'll go with you if you want. We can go after practice." Suguru offers and Satoru hums, putting a finger under his chin dramatically thinking. "Offer disappearing in three... two... one-"

"Fine. Fine."

And now here he was. Satoru tapped his fingers against his steering wheel of his blue BMW M8. The rich leather of the steering wheel feeling comforting against the pads of his fingers.

What the fuck? You're Satoru Gojo. Get a grip. Satoru thought to himself, as he shook his head. Putting on his glasses and killing the engine, stepping out of the car and tossing the keys to the nearest valet worker.

"Yo' Gojo." Turning his head, he's met with the familiar sly grin of Toji Zenin, right behind him Suguru and Nanami Kento.

"What the hell are you doing here?"

"Came to see your pussy ass. Heard all about your Friday night when you were telling Geto."

"Or more like his nosy ass, was eavesdropping when you called." Suguru mutters, and Satoru groans.

"Ever the nuisance." Nanami says and Toji rolls his eyes.

"Whatever, point is, came to get some game too. Since I'm tired of the campus girls."

"Or they could be tired of you and your broke self." Nanami says and Satoru and Suguru snort, walking past security into the loud club. The voice of Toji cussing at Nanami being drowned out by the booming base of the current song playing. Women's and men's heads turned at the group, making Toji grin at the attention.

"Well I don't know about you bums, but I'm gonna go get a piece tonight." Toji says and immediately disappears in the crowd.

"I'm gonna go get a drink." Nanami mutters, and Suguru nods.

"Yeah me too, you want something?" Suguru asks, and Satoru shakes his head.

"I'm heading to the bathroom." and the raven haired man nods, following the blonde head towards the bar.

Satoru walked through the crowd, not really feeling the sweaty bodies that kept bumping into him. Just a few feet of the bathroom until someone else collided into his chest.

"Oh shit, I'm so sorry-"

"No, it's fine- Oh! It's you." His eyes focusing on your pretty face. The look of realization falling on your features, as soon as you recognize just the person you bumped into.

"Umm, I think you might be confusing me with someone." You rush, and were about to turn when his hand grabs your forearm.

Your head turns to him, surprise on your eyes and Satoru reluctantly let go of your arm. "My bad."

You nod and head off back to your friends. Leaving a Satoru to once again stare at your ass as you walk away. Wearing another pretty dress that made you look so so good. Even if it was walking away from him.

Before he could even react, Suguru's arm went over his shoulders, passing him a glass of some sugary liquor.

"You might need this tonight, you know, so you can grow some balls again."

♡

"He's here?!" Your friends squeal over the loud music. "What did he say?!"

"Nothing he just recognized me, and I just came back to you guys."

One of your friend groans while the other facepalms. "Seriously?"

"Y/N come on! He clearly came tonight in hopes of seeing you!"

You shook your head, running a hand through your hair. Suddenly feeling out of place, and uncomfortable.

Let her go, la-la-la-la

If your girl wanna play, let her go (ah-ha)

Said let her go, la-la-la-la

The song blared through the speakers, the bass feeling like its directly in your chest. Shaking your head, you grabbed the shot of tequila from your friends hand and throwing your head back. "I'm gonna go dance." Wanting to get away from your friends questions and advice. Getting through the crowd of people and finding a spot the corner of the dance floor, where there were barely people and the colorful lights barely shined on. Swaying your hips to the beat, and trying to drown out the rest of the people.

If your girl wanna play, let her go (ah-ha)

Said let her go, la-la-la-la (ah-ha)

If your girl wanna play, let her go (ah-ha)

Said let her go, la-la-la-la

From afar, blue eyes were on you again, you could feel the gaze. Your eyes looking through the crowd to meet them, and feeling a knot on your lower belly once you did. It felt like last Friday all over again. You became entranced, your body warming up from his gaze all over you. Once again the alcohol in your veins served as a motivator to move your hips to the music. Closing your eyes and letting yourself get lost to the rhythm, entrapped in the beat and the loud pounding of the bass.

Satoru watched you, and he was fully enraptured by you. Unbeknownst to him, he had started moving your way. Making his way through the people, until he reached your little corner. Bringing the sweet drink in his hand and taking a sip. The sweet liquor nursing his nerves, and making the warmth in his skin to start to overheat.

Even with your eyes closed you knew he was right there, the nerves in you beginning to pick up but also your heart beat pounding. Or maybe that was just the loud ass bass from the music? Letting out a shaky breath, and opening your eyes, lifting your hand to him. "Wanna dance?"

Satoru lets out a grin taking your hand, and you pulled him behind you. Your back meeting his front immediately, and Satoru this time was a bit more mindful. Not wanting you to run away again, he kept his hand in yours. In your mind you questioned it.

You ran out on him, you idiot. You thought. Shaking away your doubts, you brought his hand to your hip, placing it there and keeping your hand over his, as a motion for him to hold you. Following your indication, he did, digging his fingers in the fabric that covered your hip, though even with the dress you could feel the burning touch of his fingers.

Hey, baby girl, what you doin' tonight?

I wanna see what you got in store (hey, hey baby)

You're giving it your all when you're dancin' on me

I wanna see if you can gimme some more (hey, hey baby)

"I haven't stopped thinking of you, since that night." He admits into your ear. Your ass grinds against him, and he was already semi-hard, letting out a low groan against you.

"I haven't stopped thinking of you either." You respond, turning your head slightly to look at him. More like, look at his mouth. His pink lips that had a little glaze from the drink he had been drinking. His breath smelled like sugar, and a teeny bit of liquor. Satoru moved his hips in rhythm with yours, pushing his hard on against your ass making you hum.

"You looked good yesterday, you know." His words make you widen your eyes, looking up into his own. He grins, moving his head closer to your cheek at the corner of your mouth. "Too bad you avoided me, wanted to talk to you." He pouts, placing a kiss on the spot. Your lips itching for him to kiss you.

"You saw me?"

"At the cafe, on campus."

Your breath hitches and you felt your throat run dry. He grins, and brings his drink up to his lip, your eyes watching his every move, the Adams apple on his throat bopping as he swallows. And suddenly you're so fucking thirsty.

You can be my girl, I can be your man

And we can pump this jam however you want (hey, hey baby)

Pump it from the side, pump it upside down

Or we can pump it from the back and the front (hey, hey baby)

"Y/N." Your name sounds so good on his tongue, and it sounded so good to your ears. Making a pulse run through your cunt, and you could already feel yourself become more slick in your juices. "That's your name right, pretty girl?" You nod, Satoru placing another soft kiss on the corner of your mouth and you slowly turned your head, kissing him and moaning at the sweet taste on him. Your lips moving in sync, as he licked your bottom lip and playfully biting it, pulling it until letting go. "Couldn't forget you at all, pretty girl. Even when you ran out on me."

"I didn't mean too." You confess into his lips, grazing the softness of them as you spoke. "Got nervous." You mutter and he nods, grinning. His grip on your hip tightened and pulled you back so deliciously, now practically pushing his hard on up and down your ass.

Ooh, baby, baby la-la-la-la-la-la-la (ah-ha)

Ooh, baby, baby la-la-la-la-la-la-la (ah-ha)

Ooh, baby, baby la-la-la-la-la-la-la (ah-ha)

Ooh, baby, baby la-la-la-la-la-la-la (hey, hey, baby)

"It's okay, baby."

"Satoru," You whimpered, the vibrations on your body and the heat overwhelming. And Satoru could almost bust a nut at the mention of his name in such a sinful way.

"Say it again." Pressing kisses on your jaw, you let out a low moan.

You grind against him, your hips moving up and down, the song in the background only working as a motivation to continue moving.

Ooh, drop it to the floor

Make me wanna say hey, baby (you can have whatever you want)

Yeah, you can shake some more

Make me wanna say hey baby (you can have whatever you like)

Ooh, you got it, 'cause you make me wanna say hey baby (you know what I want)

Yeah, don't stop it 

(I want you tonight)

"Fuck." Satoru curses, your ass felt so fucking good. And suddenly he's starting to feel like a 15 year old again, feeling like he could cum in his pants any second now.

In a second you've turned around, sliding your arms around his neck and bringing him down to kiss him. His hand still on your hip, and the other holding on tightly to his drink. Your fingers lightly pulled on the short hairs of his undercut, making him groan. Giving you the chance to run your tongue on his, spit mingling with his.

Don't hate the game that won't solve it

I want to get with you, mami

Now let me see where the Lord split you (dále)

Pulling away, a string of saliva connecting the two of you. You shook your head, still not believing the words coming out of your mouth. "I want more, Satoru."

Like music to his ears, and he's quick to set his drink on a nearby surface and grabbing your hand. Placing a soft kiss on your lips before motioning for you to walk ahead. Though this time, he's guiding you out of the doors. Shooting a quick text to your friends you let him guide you, Satoru grabs his keys from the valet and walks you to where his car was parked. He even had VIP parking, and your mouth dropped at the sight of his car.

He opens the driver side door and settles himself before patting his lap. Realizing the car is a two door, making a feeling of dread for on the pit of your stomach.

"What? No. I'll crush you." It slips out before you could even think what you were saying. Satoru was quick to shake his head, two strong hands gripping your thighs and pulls you forward. Settling you to straddle him as he closes the door and turns on the car, the air conditioner blasting and making goosebumps rise on your skin.

"You could suffocate me with your thighs and I'd thank you, baby." Were his words before he's swallowing your mouth again. You moaned into the kiss, and now that you were on his lap, his rock hard print of his cock was settles right against your underwear. Rocking your hips slowly, Satoru lets go, letting out a groan. Your eyes on him as your mouth a was a bit agape, breathy gasps falling out of it as you grinned your cunt on him. You knew you were wet enough that he probably had a damp spot on his pants but you didn't care. It just felt so fucking good.

His fingers pushed your dress up to the same spot you had told him last time, and he lightly pulled the lacy material of your panties, letting it snap against your hips making you jolt. Taking the opportunities to push his hips up and grind himself on you, "Satoru" You moan.

"Say my name again, baby." He says into your mouth, hands pulling your panties to the and his fingers finding your bundle of nerves with ease. The feeling making you jerk forward, your forehead pressing on his. Practically sharing the same breath as he worked on you. Maneuvering his fingers down and easing them into your cunt, a high pitched whine coming out of you as a shiver ran down your spine. His thumb working on your clit as his fingers curled inside you, pressing on the spongy spot that made you see stars.

"Jesus, Y/N, this pussy is practically crying for me." His words making your thighs tremble. His eyes on your cunt, juices gushing onto his palm as he continued working you open for him. "Look at her, she's crying out to me." You looked down, his hand working wonders on you, and you could see your juices gown down his wrist.

"F-Fuck Satoru-ah- you're gonna make me cum too fast." Pressing a kiss to your jaw, and letting out a chuckle.

"That's the whole point, pretty girl. Gotta work you up, so I can fit."

His words made your mind run with a million thoughts.

Was he being cocky or is he really that big?

Your hips jerked forward from the stimulation and the knot on your belly was impossibly tight. Your brows were pinched and your mouth wide open, filthy moans falling off your tongue and Satoru swore you were the prettiest girl in the entire world as you came on his hand.

He continued to work you through your orgasm, not letting up the pressure of the circles he was drawing with his thumb on your clit making you cry out.

Your arms hugged around his neck, practically smothering him in your tits as you rode his hand. Satoru bit your cleavage, savoring the taste of your skin and you let out a moan. "Pull the top of your dress down for me baby." You did it without even thinking, your tits spilling out and you were so thankful you didn't wear a bra today. Latching his lips on your left niple, Satoru moaned against the bud.

Satoru curled his fingers once more and put more pressure on that delicious spot inside your cunt, your vision going momentarily white as you came again. Your hair sticking to your forehead as you threw your head back. Satoru's eyes watching, drinking in the entire scene in front of him, thanking God for this a million times.

Slowly pulling his fingers out, Satoru grins up at you and brings them to his mouth. Moaning around his fingers at your taste. You felt heat come up to your cheeks at his lewd expression. "So sweet, pretty girl." You shake your head with a shy giggle, and he's quick to lean up and kiss you. Hands working under him to unbutton his pants and pull his hard cock out. Slowly running his hand up and down his girth, groaning.

You look down and your eyes widen.

He's not cocky, he is fucking huge. And it's looks so good, the first thought on your mind is that you want him in your mouth. You don't care if you can't breathe, if you gag, or cry, you just want his cock in your mouth.

You're snapped out of your gaze when Satoru is ripping open a condom packet, and your fingers take hold it. Satoru watching with an open mouth as your hands rolled the condom on him, purposely squeezing your hand around him making him rest his forehead on your tits. Lifitng yourself up a bit, and guiding him between your fold you hiss as his tip bumps into your clit. The sensation making you jolt and Satoru guides your wrist to your entrance, his mushroom tip gliding through the first ring of resistance, hugging it tightly.

"Fuck baby, pussy is just squeezing me in." He's biting all over your chest, holding himself back from just pushing himself to the hilt in one go. "So happy you didn't run away from me this time."

You're a moaning and babbling mess, the stretch of him making tears gather in the corner of your eyes and your pussy practically crying for him to just keep going. Lowering your hips little by little, you could feel him everywhere and soon enough your fully sat on his lap. His cock kissing your cervix and you felt so fucking full.

"S-So big, Satoru." You cry out, nails digging into his shoulders. Satoru eases on his assault on your tits, who are now decorated in purple marks all over.

"Too big, baby?" He cooes, kissing along your jawline.

"Move," you whine and he does, lifting his hips up into you making you whine. One hand of his already working your clit as hes fucking up into you. At a certain angle that he shifted his hips his tip bumping that spot again making you let your mouth open with an 'oh'.

Taking mental note, Satoru started fucking into that spot. Your arms now wrapped around his neck, sucking on his tongue to quiet your moans. The knot on your belly already forming quickly, from the stimulation and the feeling of him.

Satoru grunted as he felt the familiar tightness in his balls. You were squeezing him so tight, the warmth of your cunt engulfing his cock even with the condom, making him so close.

"Fuck baby, not gonna last long." He moans into your mouth. "Need you to cum for me, pretty girl."

He's mean as he fucks you, the skin of your thighs practically slamming on his lap as he thrust up to you while one of his hands pulls you down by the hip to meet his thrusts. Your tits bouncing as you moved. He was all over you, his smell, his touch, his taste and his sounds were everywhere and it was riveting.

"Sa- oh fuck- 'toru." The nickname made him clench his jaw, finally pressing a mean circle on your clit making your eyes roll back into your head. The sound of juices gushing out of you making Satoru's ears perk up, and glance down. You were squirting all over him, and holy shit that did it. Satoru's letting out a guttural moan, filling the condom up to the brim. Fucking you through his and your orgasm. Your body trembling and jolting at the overstimulating, he was practically drawing out your orgasm to be longer.

Once he started softening, he slowed down until he finally let you rest on his lap. Your vision had dark spots, your mind buzzing in euphoria. Satoru places soft wet kisses around your neck until he met your lips.

"You still with me, baby?"

You meekly nod, trying to catch your breath. He slowly pulling you up, his cock slipping out of you and setting you back. Reaching over the middle condile he pulls out some tissues and cleans you up and him in the process. Your face in the crook of his neck, still reeling from your orgasm. Once you felt a pat on your cunt from him positioning your panties back into place, your mind finally realized everything.

You're pulling yourself back to look at Satoru. You squirted on him, in his car?!

You've reached a new low Y/N. Your mind practically screams at you.

"Hi." He grins and you bite your lip, looking out of his tinted windows. There were a few people from the club walking to their cars.

"You planning on running out on me again?"

"Maybe." You tease and he rolls his eyes. Pulling your dress up over your tits and down to cover your panties, the action making you realize just how exposed you had been.

"So..." Satoru starts. "Can I get your number?"

Your brows furrowed and avoided his gaze. "Why?"

"So I can take you out on a date?"

You shook your head. That mean voice in the back of your head ridiculing you.

This is just a joke. It kept saying.

"I don't think that's a good idea." You mumbled and Satoru tilted his head in confusion. Grabbing your phone from the middle console where it had been forgotten at the start of the rendezvous, he managed to face it towards you. The device betraying you as it unlocked with your surprised face, and satoru was quick to go into the phone app. His fingers typing rather quick on the screen.

Your eyes stayed on his fingers, they looked so long. The fact that they were stuffed inside you just a while ago making your body heat up.

A text message tone rung out and you glanced at his own phone that lit up. Recognizing your number on his screen.

The look of conflict on your face made Satoru's grin drop, clearing his throat and quickly setting a cocky grin. "Or you know, If you ever wanna..." He wiggles his eyebrows up and down suggestively making you let out a soft laugh. "Call me." You nod and open the car door, slowly getting out, while Satoru watched you.

"Can I at least take you home?"

You glanced back at the club, then down at your phone 2:34 am.

"I should actually find my friends. Just to make sure they're not too drunk to drive home." He nods in understanding, getting out of his car and locking it behind him. The loss of warmth making goosebumps rise on your skin as you walked back into the club. Your body on auto-pilot as you scurried through the crowd.

Running away from Satoru, once again.

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