#and i'm just being unreasonably upset about it | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

morose-melodies · 3 months ago

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hello!

First,i have something to say to the fatuis in the pregnant reader fic...JOKES ON YOU İ HAVE A HİGH CHANCE OF MİSSCARRİAGE AND PROBABLY NEVER HAVE KİDS(we can act like this part doesnt exists)

anyway,onto the point.Can i request capitano,dottore,Childe and pantalone with a reader who acts really REALLY cold towards them and refuses to ask any favor from them?like- even if they are thirsty in the middle of the night,they would just sleep,wait until the morning and then ask one of the maids for a cup of water.if anything here makes you uncomfortable you are free to ignore it!

cold as snezhnaya | various! yandere! fatui harbinger x reader

a/n: I got a little bit lazy sorry!!

CAPITANO

capitano would bend over back for you, he'd do whatever you pleased... if only you'd ask.

initially, the captain hadn't noticed your cold demeanor, or... he simply didn't pay mind to it. perhaps you were having a bad day? well, he'd do everything in his power to make you feel better.

but, it never seemed to work.

no matter how many times he'd come home to you after a long grueling mission, you were still the same.

he had tried approaching you differently, giving you space, and even coming home with gifts. nothing worked.

perhaps you were afraid of him? he would remove his mask and armor before approaching you, and he would try to smile more for you - once again, nothing worked.

he wouldn't give up on you, ever. you were worth fighting for.

"(y/n)," he approached you one early morning, watching from a distance as you poured yourself, "how have you been? is there anything you'd like?"

he could hear you sigh once he started speaking.

"no."

he, too, sighed. you were complex - confusing but capitano wanted to figure you out. he wanted to suit you and be whatever pleased you.

but, he had tried everything. if he were being honest with himself, he was getting frustrated - not with you but himself.

he placed a hand on the counter, and watched you. he wanted to plead with you, to understand how you were feeling, to understand why.

"is there something upsetting you? you could tell me and we would-"

"no. no, I'm fine."

you took your tea and turned to leave.

the captain prided himself on his self-control. he would never lash out at you, so, why did he take a large step towards you and grab your arm?

if you weren't afraid of him before, surely you were now.

"(y/n), please. tell me what I could do for you, anything, ask anything of me. do you not understand how much I care for you?"

when you tried to pull away, a shocked look on your face, his grip tightened, "(y/n), answer me. do it or I swear to the archons-"

"let go-!" tugging once again, you tried to free your arm from his painful grip, "let me go! that's what i want."

he released you immediately.

if you asked, he'd never show his face to you again.

"(y/n), forgive me," he started, looking at you, at the way you looked at him and couldn't finish - he stood there, his heart pounding hard against his chest.

he was the worst, was he not?

he would spend the rest of his life working for your forgiveness, and wouldn't regret a second of it.

DOTTORE

dottore had been considering something immoral as of late.

you've been acting differently, rude even and that was him putting it nicely. sure, he had been selfish by taking you from your home to be with him.

but, he was a selfish man.

your behavior was looked down upon, oh, how dottore hated it. it was unreasonable and immature.

he wished you'd grow up and talk to him about it instead of sulking and dragging your feet around the manor.

after a few attempts, dottore had given up on tending to your needs; he stopped trying to make you feel at home.

it didn't exactly matter how you felt, did it? you were here to make him happy, no? so, why were you making him feel so frustrated?

the sound of shattering glass caught dottore's attention - looking down at his bloodied hand, he saw that he had squeezed the small vial just a bit too hard.

you were becoming a distraction, a very bad problem.

now, as for what he was considering. well, he wanted you to change, to be the lovable angel you once were, it seemed impossible, oh, but it wasn't. not for him anyway.

and, it only took him five months to perfect it. in the form of a small pill was a life-changing drug.

"go get (y/n) for me," dottore asked of an assistant, pocketing the pill with his bloodied hand, oops. dottore looked at his hand, grimacing, he'd need to patch it up sooner than later.

a few minutes had passed when the assistant came back, peeking into the officer nervously, "come in - don't just stand there," dottore shook his head at the man.

"she's asleep, sir."

oh yes, it was nearly four in the morning. dottore nodded and waved the man off, he pocketed the pill and bandaged his hand.

...

while you were idly staring out a window, dottore dropped the pillow into your tea as he passed you by.

he'd be lying if he said he wasn't feeling even a little bit excited.

soon enough, you'd be the same (y/n) he met years ago, he mused as he made his way to his bedroom. oh, he needed rest badly and his back was killing him.

you took the mug and sipped the drink.

you pressed your cheek against the cold glass once more, your warm breath fogging up the glass. in the next few hours, you would idly sip your drink until it was gone.

dottore slept soundly, having forgotten about everything he'd done in the past few months. he was exhausted.

so, when you opened his bedroom door, peeking in at him.

he was confused.

"dottore, could I sleep beside you?"

"... of course," nonetheless, he agreed, how could he deny you?

CHILDE

childe had randomly, at some point, anticipated that you might hate him and never return the love he feels for you.

it was a passing thought, though. he'd never sat down and thought of how he'd react, or how he'd convince you to love him.

but, now that he's in that exact situation, he's been thinking nonstop about it.

he didn't want you to hate him - he didn't want you to feel out of place in snezhnaya, he wanted you to be loved, and feel safe - he wanted you to feel at home.

seeing that you didn't enjoy being here or anywhere near him, his mind was fuzzy - he hadn't thought a straight thought in a while, especially when you were near. he wanted to hug you, or drop to his knees and beg you to love him back - if it would work, then he'd do it.

he was getting a bit desperate.

it was getting increasingly uncomfortable to sit in silence while eating by your side - shouldn't the two of you be talking to one another; enjoying each other's presence like normal couples?

clearing his throat, ajax asked, "how's the food, (y/n)? my... my mom used to make it all the time when i was little. huh, it's probably not giving her justice... her's had a distinct taste."

he was met with silence.

uncomfortable silence.

"... she would make it for my birthday... uh, it was my favorite."

you glanced at him, before looking back down at your food.

childe sighed, resting his chin into his palm as he looked at you. he was super frustrated "you're upsetting me, (y/n)... as much as i hate to admit it."

you lifted your head to look at him, your eyebrow raised, your fork hanging in your hand, "why's that?"

it was that! that exact attitude, that's why he was so upset! without much of a second thought, childe tugged you out of your chair, holding onto your arm tightly.

"gosh, (y/n), what's with you!? I love you, i love you so much! s-so why are you acting like this!? just tell me! tell me so i can make it better!"

squeezing your arms, his hands trembled. he was at his wits end with you; he just wanted your love, was that too much to ask for?

pulling you against his chest, he hugged you tightly, "(y/n), what did I do so wrong?" he pressed his lips to the top of your head, kissing you. "let me make it better, please let me fix this."

PANTALONE

pantalone only ever gave you his best.

in appearance and attitude. you'd never catch him being angry, or having his hair disheveled - that was below him.

so, he couldn't understand why you were appreciative of all the effort he put into you - he would buy you nice clothing, hire maids to do your hair, have large breakfasts made for you, and even allow you to roam the garden freely.

he does all of that and yet you won't even speak to him willingly - it was disheartening, least to say.

but, he was understanding. you were scared, that had to be it, right? this was a very sudden change for you, of course, you were afraid.

or so, he thought.

as time passed, and he gave you time and space, he realized you were just cold to him and now, he simply couldn't understand why.

he treated you very well; he gave you affection and nice things, and he even gave you space when it seemed you needed it.

but, no matter what he did, he had never gotten a single 'thank you' from you. you had no manners and that upset him more than anything.

admittedly, he had gotten too angry.

watching you roam the snowy garden without as much as a coat frustrated him, but it mattered not; he'd give you his coat, and you would thank him if that was the last thing you did.

"(y/n), are you enjoying the garden?"

"I am."

"are you not cold?" as he walked nearer to you, he noticed you shifted away from him. once again, it did not matter! he would form you into a respectable person.

"no."

"you and I both know that's not true, here," slipping off his coat, he placed it over your shoulders and manually slipped your arms through the sleeves, "there - I'm sure you feel much better now, no?"

you stared down at the flowers, your lips pressed into a thin line.

oh, so you were upset now? "it was very gentlemanly of me to offer you my coat, a thank you would be kind."

he was simply suggesting it, or that's what his tone suggested anyway.

"I didn't ask for your coat, here you can have it back," you sighed, attempting to remove the coat to give back to him, "I'll go back in soon. it doesn't matter."

"no, no," he shook his head, placing a hand on your shoulder to keep the coat on, "it wouldn't kill you to thank me. have some manners, (y/n)."

he could see it in your expression, you were agitated. well, too bad.

"... (y/n), you're kidding me," he was surprised you'd be so stubborn, "can you not thank me? when have i ever asked this of you? not once. so, humble you-"

"thank you, pantalone, for the coat," you cut him off, glaring as you walked past him to go back inside.

it was a start! pantalone would take it. so, smiling to himself, he looked down at the flowers before him.

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fitzhastoomanysideblogs · 2 years ago

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I swear to God I am so tired of being like a punching bag for my sister (and everyone else but mostly her)

#vent #just now she decided to yell at me for not liking the smell of something #and then she gets everyone else to yell at and make fun of me #and then I' expected to just be immediately okay like nothing just happened #she does this to me all the time #she yells at me for the littlest things and treats me like garbage #and then tries to gaslight me into thinking I'm over dramatic and unreasonably upset #and tbh it's kinda working #because now i'm sitting her wondering what if I dod do something eorngand I can't remember??#anyway i'm so sick andt tired of her treating me like garbage and expecting me to not try to defend myself #and then she convinces everyonethat me standing up for myself is me being unreasonable #and then everyone starts yelling at me #she's abusive towards me but won't admit it #anf the thing is she's younger than me (like 5 years younger I think??)#so there's nothing i can really do about it

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mischievouslittlecreature · 1 month ago

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I told her I was gonna cancel my haircut appointment I have for this week because I don't wanna be an asshole and expose other people when I might be sick/contagious since it's pretty much a given that I'm gonna get whatever she's got. And she acted like I was being the most unreasonable, selfish monster in the world 🙄

As if I wasn't already teetering on the edge of a nervous breakdown because my abusive nightmare of a grandmother is coming to visit over the weekend, my mom is fucking sick because OF COURSE SHE IS.

#excuse me for thinking of other people #and how i would hope someone else would behave if they were sick or had been exposed to someone who was #guess that makes me a monster then #she can be such a fucking bitch sometimes GOD #she loves to act all understanding of my mental health issues #and yet when something actual triggers/upsets me she acts like i'm being the most inconvenient unreasonable person alive #even though i haven't even fucking done or said anything i just went to hide out in my room #the most i've done is post these two posts ranting about it #lily babbles

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nyaagolor · 11 months ago

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Ranking the Ace Attorney main cast on whether or not I think they'd be a narc

I was making a more coherent, serious post about the different approaches to justice each of the characters have and how that is shaped by their backstory... and then I realized a funnier question is what they would do if they saw you eating a weed brownie so I made this post instead

Phoenix: In the trilogy era, yes. He trusts people, but believes that trust has to be built on pursuing justice and always accepting the harsh reality. He'd be sad about it, but a narc nonetheless. In his Beanix era he's making his money through "totally legal gambling" and on the hunt for questionably legal evidence so I have no doubt in my mind there's a pot farm under the WAA for supplemental income. He gives up his narc ways and for that I salute him

Apollo: If I were to pick a single member of this cast who is NOT invited to the rotation it would be him. He had zero hesitation throwing Kristoph to the wolves after working for him for years so I know he has absolutely zero qualms about ratting out his friends or coworkers. Loyalty means nothing in the eyes of justice and it means nothing to him. He's a narc.

Athena: She's gonna lecture you and look all sad about it, but she's no snitch. She's been through the rounds with Simon so she gets it. Having to know you hurt her feelings is enough of a punishment in her eyes

Edgeworth: He's not a narc but he IS obsessed with being right, so if you don't immediately fess up with exactly what you're doing he's going to send your stoned ass to the chess dimension and honestly I think that's worse

Franziska: Unfortunately she is a cop. Narc.

Godot: Diego-era yeah he's a narc, but after the coma? I feel like he has better things to worry about, he would just ignore you. He has some soul searching to do and some grief complexes to unlearn he doesn't have the time to be a lil snitch. Post prison I think he's stoned somewhere in Kurain and chillaxing, as is his right

Klavier: Don't let his rockstar attitude fool you he's a narc and extremely annoying about it. The gavinners tour bus is dry as hell and it's all Klavier's fault. Daryan offers him a line and he gets all uppity and says "the only LINE i want you doing is the third line in the prechorus, you keep messing up the syncopation" and that's the end of that discussion

Simon: He's been in prison so he knows what's up. Not a narc. Might glare at you until you share though

Nahyuta: He's a narc and will lecture you so long about it you're tempted to turn yourself in to get out of earshot. He also never forgets and never forgives. Datz is trying to reform him but it isn't going well

Sebastian: Yes, but I think the idea of him having to turn in someone for it would make him cry so they end up comforting him instead. Kay thinks he needs to try a weed brownie

Maya: I want you to look at me and tell me she doesn't smoke weed. Not a narc

Pearl: I think if she found out that her big sister figure smoked weed she would have a heart attack. Def a narc

Trucy: I can say with absolute certainty that if you really wanted weed she could find you a dealer faster than anyone in the cast. Trucy is a magician and has grown up around a variety of people involved with some seedier institutions, she knows better than to snitch. Has not been and will never be a narc

Kay: Will help you shoplift. Not a narc

Gumshoe: A narc on principle, but would feel really bad about it and would probably let you off with a warning if you started crying or acting upset because I think he's a softie. He's not unreasonable

Ema: If you think she has even the tiniest sliver of respect for cops you're lying to yourself. Not a narc and will actively help you evade police out of principle. A homie, honestly

Fulbright: Not only is he a narc but he definitely runs the DARE program at the local highschool and is printed on half the posters they put up in the precinct. I'm also like 80% sure he doesn't actually know how weed works

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pyrodolls · 2 months ago

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can you write sounding with one of the yan boys or ignoring them because of something?

GIVING SUPERFAN! AND STALKER! YANDERE BOYS THE COLD SHOULDER

warnings: obsessiveness, sfw, some slight su!c!de references, bayani is basically a servant and victor needs a therapist, just overall unhealthy behavior cuz they're yanderes. (i do not condone yanderes irl and this is for writing purposes) gender neutral reader, no use of y/n.

a/n: hey guys i just found out my best friend might be dating my ex bf (that made me hide in my house for a year) which is funny bc he told me "not to worry about her" while we were dating. and my birthday is in 2 hours so it's quite an unfortunate time to find out that they've apparently been dating for a few months. if it's true, then whatever LMFAOOO now she's gotta deal with him and it ain't my problem. also thanks for 1k followers, you guys are awesome!! sorry for not updating much, i just don't have a lot of motivation these days

———————————————————

if you ignored bayani...

bro do you *want* him to jump off a cliff???

he is panicking. he is having a CRISIS

bayani lives to please you. if he's talking to you and you just ignored him for whatever reason, he would be heartbroken. absolutely crushed.

he would attempt to ask what's wrong, and fix it as soon as possible. as much as he enjoys being mistreated by you, he'd hate for you to be upset with him for an extended period of time.

his first instinct is to fix whatever he did wrong. he would automatically blame himself, even if it wasn't actually his fault.

he always seeks your love and validation. if you were to ignore him, he would literally sink into the floor and die.

if you forgive him and stop ignoring him, he would be overjoyed. and he'd be less clingy, and a lot more careful around you. he wouldn't want you to get mad at him ever again. that would be his worst nightmare. if you want him to return to his old self, let him know he can be clingy again. if you don't, he'll remain cautious around you for the rest of his life. he just wants you to be happy with him. he can hold himself back from showing too much affection if it means you'll approve of him.

if you ignored victor...

yeah no he's not having it lmao

he'd be so butthurt. and unlike bayani, victor would be very annoying and start hanging around you more. usually he lets you do the talking, or follows you around from a far distance. but if you started ignoring him, he'd become more talkative just to piss you off.

he hates being ordered around, so he's not gonna let you stop him from interacting with you. he's gonna keep talking to you and hanging around you no matter what.

it'd take about a week for him to get agitated. he'd wonder what he did wrong, and try to ignore his insecurities by pushing them on you. instead of drowning in his sorrow, he'd turn it into anger and blame you. you're the one being unreasonable, he did nothing wrong. of course he doesn't believe that, but that's what he would convince himself. he would rather take his anger out on you, the love of his life, rather than admit how unhappy he is with himself and how he treats others.

he'd find ways to punish you for your behavior. as much as he loves you, he won't accept any disrespect. he takes it as a huge blow to his (very fragile) ego.

BUT if you gave up and started talking to him again, he'd get a huge ego boost. of course you'd talk to him again, he's just irresistible! this was totally expected... even though he was crying in his bedroom every night wondering why you weren't talking to him and got very insecure, wondering what he did to make you mad at him. would he ever confess this, though? nope.

he's too prideful to admit that he missed your voice and attention, but he'd show how sorry he is by helping you with chores and work. if you bring it up, he'll say something along the lines of: "i'm not doing this because i'm sorry... i just think you weren't doing it right. i know how to do it better."

this insecure and bratty ass man child would rather sit naked on a hot grill than verbally say sorry lmao

#yandere x reader #yandere imagines #yandere #yandere boys x popstar reader #male yandere x reader #soft yandere #sub yandere #yandere headcanons #yandere oc #male yandere #oc x reader #yandere boy #yandere oc x reader #yandere oneshot #yandere bf #obsessive yandere #my ocs #masochist yandere

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pixiesholloworld · 3 months ago

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✭୨୧˚LIKE SHAY SHAY!˚୨୧✭

synopsis⟿ after a heated argument with your boyfriend sukuna, he tries to smooth things out by treating you to something special…

not proofread and kinda shitty

sukuna was really passionate about being with you.. like over the top passionate he fell for you almost instantly when he saw you for the first time at the grocery store, his eyes tracing your curves taking note on how they hugged up on your tube top and tiny little shorts. He tried to play it cool, not saying too much of anything, you thought he was kind of corny because of it but it was cute. so of course when you gave this mysterious beefcake a chance he wouldn't spare a single second not doting after you.

you heard the way he talked to others- how he spoke to them like they were below him, you knew how he pushed his way to the top of his job, selling drugs, guns, and many many other "services". he knew how to get his way with others whether it was by force or reason, more importantly how he wasn't ever up for being the bigger person— all that matters to him is being able to prove a point. sukuna wasn't one for high roads when it came to other people.. but you?

oh you had him whipped, its honestly a shock to anyone how a crybaby like you ended up with such a brute man. though anytime he did happen to upset you he immediately apologizes in his own aggressive yet gentle way, willing to go above and beyond just to get in your good graces again. its so out of character for him to care about a person this much, so much so that his friends are convinced you did some type of voodoo on him, forcing him to act right or else. so when you left to work in the midst of a heated argument you weren't surprised to see that he had — yet again — sent a bouquet of your favorite flowers with a note:

"take off and i’ll make it up to you doll

i pinky promise"

you scoff at his appealing message, moving the flowers to the backroom of your job. who does he think he is? sending you flowers when you're clearly upset with him, does ignoring his first 50 calls mean nothing? with his perfect handwriting and perfect attention to detail. i guess dating a jailbird had its perks..

"trouble in paradise again?" your coworker snickers.

you roll your eyes and stuff the note in your pocket, you had another 7 hours here and you weren't going to let sukuna seduce you out of a well earned paycheck.. even IF he would've paid you double the amount to go home to him. but if sukuna had to admit it that same level of pettiness is exactly why he's with a woman like you

—

later that night you drove home, exhausted, hungry and still angry, you turn the keys to your apartment to see sukuna pulling pizza out the oven, its almost as if he read your mind. you drag yourself over to your shared room plopping on the bed, trying to relax and push your angry thoughts down but it all washes away when a familiar warmth creeps upon your back "hey sweet lady" his husky voice cutting though the tension and shooting right through your heart. you hated being mad at him but you couldn't help it how could he forget about the ONE thing that upsets you the most?! you pull away from his touch curling up into a ball

"awh don't be like that doll"

"you yelled at me.." you mumble through a choked up throat. he curls up against you, his thumb circling your temple. You loved how warm he felt on your back and it was nice that he remembers your love language even if you are being a bit unreasonable. anytime sukuna raises his voice just a smidge you get all teary eyed "so that's what this is all about?" he hums, pulling you closer to him by your waist, "i'm sorry sweetie-"

you cut him off, just wanting to say what you didn't have the words to say earlier, "i just don't understand why you have to work so late," you pull his large hand off of your head and hold it in front of your face, tracing along the lines and calloses that scar his skin, "i just miss you s'all" he heard you loud and clear, "hey," he gently called, grabbing your face and turning it towards him so you can look him in the eyes while he says this, "i don't really like workin' that late either but money doesn't make itself". He pushes the strands of braids out our face so he can get a good look at you, grabbing your chin and rubbing his thumb against it, "i miss you when i'm gone too baby but we can make the most of our time right now"

you let out a relaxed sigh feeling a sense of relief now that you both know what you were trying to say, you look him in his crimson eyes and crack a soft smile. "so.. are we friends again?" he playfully asks, you shake your head yes and pull him in for a kiss. he returns the favor 10 fold of course. locking you in his arms as he peppers kisses in the crook of your neck and on your face until suddenly your eyes lock and for what feels like an eternity, the world stops. without a second thought the two of you started taking your clothes off exchanging kisses in between rushed breaths.

this wasn’t a normal thing for you two, you were never one to initiate makeup sex you’d rather cuddle and watch a movie. though sukuna admittedly has been dreaming of this moment, where he finally gets to show you how sorry he really is. he doesn’t spare a moment yanking your work clothes off of you, crashing his lips into yours he steals the taste he craved right out of your mouth. your lust filled whimpers were oh so sweet to him, you were practically begging him for more and he was gonna give you every. single. inch.

he pulls his mouth from yours watching how your your pleading eyes gloss over, you move a hand up to the nape of his neck before pulling his ear close to your mouth

"let me ride it"

though you were known as a crybaby to everyone sukuna knew the dirty girl that hid deep inside you, it was a side of you that only he could access and he loved every bit of that. due to this fact a wide smile creeps up on his face when you double down, "you heard me?"

"you didn't have to say nuthin' but a word princess"

he rolls over on his back pulling you right over him, your leaking entrance hanging right over his angry, pink tip begging to let it explore your insides. your eyes trail from sukuna's happy trail all the way up to his hungry eyes, he's not one to rush but you can tell he's growing impatient as his thumbs massage the sides of your plush hips

"enjoying the view?"

you suck your teeth and steady his head over your slit slowwwly pushing down until every inch of him fits snugly into your wet crevasse, you wince at the sudden stretching it's not something you're sure you'll ever get use to. you start slowly at first dragging yourself ever so slowly trying to get him all worked up, you can tell its working because of how intense his stare is.

his hands worked over to your tits squeezing and cupping them ever so gingerly,, he was trying to be patient,, his breath hitches a bit as you press your small hands on his chest. "been thinking of that pussy all day" he admits, one of his hands move under your ass squeezing the fat and lightly spanking it demanding a yelp out of you, "you get my gift?"

"mmhm~" you answer, picking up your pace just a bit more, he smiles at this and sneakily moves his other hand under your ass, spanking it again just so he can hear you yelp

"you like it?" he asks, eyes switching between watching your pussy swallow him whole and your cute little face. if your blush could be seen you're sure you'd look as red as a tomato by now, seeing him look at you so intently like this made you feel so dizzy. you move your head down to his ear once more

"i loved it"

unbeknownst to you this would be the final straw to push sukuna over the edge, he loves to be praised and he was gonna show you exactly what your words do to him. using the hands underneath your ass he tilts you towards his chest and immediately starts drilling into you, you can feel yourself clutching around his girth, deep groans escape his mouth as he fucks tiny whimpers and slutty squelches out of yours

you can feel sukuna's body temperature raise almost the instant your breasts are pressed against him, he thrusts faster, the sound of your bodies along with your desperate cries filled his ears, pap, pap, pap! he grew harder at the the thought that you could be heard in the surrounding rooms of your apartment though his main motivation was how loud he could make you scream his name. oh how he loved to make you scream, he’d feel you clawing at him as your broken up mewls fueled his boner it was almost like a reward and he knew exactly how to get more of what he was chasing after

he quickly pops his dick out and flips you on your back, "there's my pretty girl," he coos, "need to see that cock drunk face before i finish" he slams his lips into yours once more slipping his dick inside in the process. he places a hand on your stomach feeling how your soft pretty skin heats up to his touch he places another behind your head and starts up again. deep, drawn out thrusts just how his lady likes it, he felt how your gummy walls squeezed at the sudden change in tempo, making his stomach tense up and drill into you even deeper

"fuuckk, keep goin' woman," he buries his head into the crook of your neck, his thrusts becoming quicker and sloppier the more you called out his name, he looked down to see the concupiscent amounts of cream on his cock— so lewd, the sight of it made a muted whimper escape his lips. he was gonna blow soon and you could tell, "you feel so good mama" he breathes out, his voice so low yet wispy, it sent electric bolts straight to your clit. he doesn’t let up though, thrusting deeper as if he was trying to break through your cervix "'k-kuna~, 'kuna~" you manage to gasp out, you lock him in your gasp with your legs, "don't stop- god please don't stop!~" you felt breathless yet hot, your soft hands felt around his hardened body looking for something, anything to keep you grounded

"m'here baby, shit- m'gonna cum" he groans, lifting himself up to stare in your eyes before you both come to your inevitable finish. a hand reaches up to his face and another on his heartbeat, you felt how hard it was thumping, how hard his body was working in this moment. you could feel him working himself through your pussy until he hits that one spot, causing your mouth to drop right open. you start tearing up you and let out a loud scream, squirt uncontrollably splashes all over his pelvis making him give a loud, guttural groan

“i-i love you ‘kuna— fuuckk!~ iloveyou!” these were the last intelligible words spoken by you before the rest turned into a slurry mess, you babbled on and on repeating iterations of ‘i love you’. normally sukuna would stop and tease you for it but he was already about to blow

the best he can do is he let you ride out your orgasm, he moved his thumb down to your clit and started rubbing sensual circles over it, "give it all t'me" he commands still rolling his hips into your tight, swollen cunt. he watches as your facial expressions change. he loved how you’d squeeze your eyes so tightly and leave your mouth open nice and wide, "that's it,” he purrs “what a sweet girl", he bends down to kiss your forehead feeling how your body shakes beneath him, “you love me?”

“yes! yes!~”

“you’re not just sayin that ‘cause i fuck you good?”

“i love you ‘kuna” you breathe out between sobs, he wipes the tears from your eyes and shushes you, planting kisses on your face which to his surprise makes your pussy sieze up squirt a little again.

as he tries to drag himself out he finds that he can’t, he places his hands on the side of your head, feeling his legs begin to shake, he lets out a low, desperate grunt throwing his head back while thrusting until he fills you up to the brim with hot, thick spurts of cum. he watches how it combines with your juices, letting the feeling totally control him until finally his muscles relax and his body gives out

“i love you too woman” he breathes out

your legs fully give out at this point, tired from the sudden boost of serotonin, taking note of this he pulls out and lays next to you holding your hand and kissing on it

you both lie there speechless for a moment before he breaks the silence

“you like cold pizza?”

#jjk #jjk smut #jjk x reader #smut #black reader #x reader #y/n #sukuna #ryomen sukuna #sukuna x reader #sukuna x y/n #sukuna x you #jjk x y/n #jjk sukuna #jujustsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu sukuna #jujutsu kaisen #mdni #divider by cafekitsune

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lxvsiick · 2 months ago

Text

THE STARS ARE ALL ASLEEP | HAN TAESAN X READER

PAIRING: idol! han taesan x non!idol! fem! reader

SUMMARY: The loss and regret Taesan feels, trying to hold on to the memories of Y/n despite the pain

GENRE: angst, breakup, taesan is kinda an ass, imagine, short story

WORDCOUNT: 5.9k

A/N: ngl, did i procrastinate during my lecture to write this? yes . . . i wrote this after listening to 星星都睡了 by PPlin x Zhen Li -- I'm basically giving you guys song reccs to listen to -- the song is really good!... enjoy the story!

★🎸🎧⋆｡ °⋆

I can take care of myself, you don’t need to keep worrying about me.

I don’t smile anymore.

The clock on the wall ticked away the late hours of the evening as Y/n sat curled up on the couch, her legs tucked beneath her, staring blankly at the TV. She wasn’t really watching, her mind too preoccupied with the events of the day. Work had been a disaster. Her boss had been harsher than usual, throwing out unreasonable demands and critiques that left her feeling drained and upset.

She sighed, glancing at her phone. No messages from Taesan. It wasn’t unusual—he was busy, always on the go with rehearsals, interviews, and performances. Being a famous idol meant long hours and even longer nights. Still, they shared this apartment, and she always tried to stay awake to talk to him when he came home.

Her heart lifted slightly when she heard the soft jingle of keys at the door. The lock clicked, and Taesan stepped inside, his hood pulled low over his face, slumping with exhaustion as he kicked off his shoes. He barely glanced in her direction as he made his way into the living room.

She straightened up on the couch, hoping for just a moment of his attention. “Hey, you’re home,” she greeted softly, forcing a small smile. “How was your day?”

“Long,” he muttered, not meeting her eyes as he walked past, heading straight for the kitchen to grab a drink. His tone was flat, his movements sluggish.

Y/n watched him, her heart sinking. “I had the worst day today,” she said, trying again to start a conversation. “My boss was being such a—”

“Not now,” he interrupted, his voice edged with weariness as he leaned against the counter, rubbing his temples. “I’m tired. I don’t want to talk.”

She froze, the words hanging in the air between them, heavier than she expected. She had been waiting all day to tell him about what happened, hoping he would listen, hoping she could find some comfort in his presence. But his dismissal felt like a slap to the face.

Her throat tightened as she swallowed her emotions. “Oh,” she whispered, her voice barely audible. “Okay.”

The silence stretched out uncomfortably as Taesan took a sip of his drink, still not looking at her. She tried to keep her disappointment from showing, but it was too late. The lump in her throat made it hard to speak, and the weight of the day, combined with his coldness, felt suffocating.

She stood up quietly, wrapping her arms around herself as if to shield against the sudden chill between them. “I’ll... leave you alone, then,” she murmured, backing away toward the bedroom. She didn’t wait for his response. He didn’t offer one.

As she turned, her steps slow and deliberate, her heart ached. This wasn’t how she imagined the night going. She had wanted to vent, to share her frustrations with the one person who mattered most to her. But now, she felt more alone than she had all day.

When she closed the bedroom door behind her, the click sounded louder than usual in the quiet apartment. She sat on the edge of the bed, staring at her hands, wondering if he even noticed how much she needed him right now.

Back in the living room, Taesan let out a deep sigh, closing his eyes as the weight of the day pressed down on him. He hadn’t meant to be so cold, but he was just too tired. Too tired to think, to listen, to be anything but worn out.

But in the silence that followed, something gnawed at him—a faint sense of guilt that he couldn’t quite shake, knowing she had wanted to talk, knowing she had needed him.

And he hadn’t been there.

☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★

I don’t want to think about you all the time.

We tried our hardest to hurt everything between us, and now it’s impossible to repair.

The sun was beginning to set, casting a warm, orange glow over the city streets. Y/n sat on the bench at the bus stop, nervously checking her phone for what felt like the hundredth time. Her heart was filled with a mixture of excitement and impatience—today was supposed to be special. Their anniversary.

Taesan had promised to take her on a date after his interview, a rare moment in their hectic lives where they could celebrate together. She’d dressed up, her heart racing with anticipation, hoping for some time alone with him. But now, as the minutes dragged on, she couldn’t help but feel the growing sense of unease.

She scrolled through her phone again, the unanswered messages staring back at her: "Hey, interview over yet?" "Are you still coming?" "Let me know if you're running late."

No response. No calls. Nothing.

She sighed, biting her lip and glancing down the empty street. The buses came and went, passengers getting on and off, but there was still no sign of him. Her excitement slowly deflated into something more like dread.

A cold breeze picked up, and she pulled her jacket tighter around her. She couldn’t shake the feeling of being stood up, but that couldn’t be true, right? He wouldn’t just forget their anniversary. He wouldn’t break his promise to her.

In an attempt to distract herself, she opened her social media, scrolling absentmindedly through the feed. That’s when she saw it—a post from a fan page featuring Taesan and his group at some event. There he was, smiling and laughing with his bandmates, dressed in an outfit far too formal for just an interview.

Her heart sank. The caption beneath the photo read, "Surprise appearance at the event! BOYNEXTDOOR looking dashing as always."

She stared at the screen, the image of him so happy, so carefree. She felt a knot twist in her chest, anger and sadness mixing together. He wasn’t just late—he had gone somewhere else entirely, without even telling her. He had time for an event but not for their anniversary.

Her fingers hovered over the phone, wanting to call him again, but she knew it wouldn’t change anything. He wasn’t coming.

With a heavy sigh, she stood up, her heart feeling heavier than her feet as she trudged back toward their apartment. Her phone buzzed in her pocket, but she ignored it, knowing it wasn’t from him.

The walk back felt longer than usual, her mind replaying the excitement she’d felt that morning—how she’d looked forward to tonight, how she’d thought this anniversary would be a rare moment where they could be like any other couple. But instead, she was left alone, walking home in the dim light, her hands stuffed in her pockets to keep warm.

Finally, she reached the front door of their apartment building. Pausing for a moment, she glanced back at the empty street, a small part of her still hoping to see him running toward her, apologizing for being late. But the street remained empty, quiet, just like the unanswered messages on her phone.

With a deep breath, she entered the building and climbed the stairs to their apartment. As she unlocked the door and stepped inside, the stillness of the apartment felt colder than the air outside. No flowers, no candles, no sign that today was any different from any other day.

She sank onto the couch, staring blankly at the wall, the weight of disappointment settling in her chest like a stone. All she wanted was to be with him, to feel like she mattered, like they mattered. But tonight, she felt more alone than ever.

☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★

You never cared about trying to get my forgiveness.

Don’t let us be covered in scars.

The apartment was quiet, save for the soft hum of the city outside. Y/n sat on the couch, her knees pulled to her chest, hugging a small black cat stuffed animal that Taesan had won for her on one of their early dates. Her eyes were red-rimmed, tears brimming but not falling. She stared blankly at her phone, an article open on the screen, the words blurring in front of her.

The jingle of keys at the door signaled his arrival. The door creaked open, and Taesan stepped in, exhaustion heavy in his posture. He looked worn from the day, his hair disheveled, still in his stage clothes. He let out a deep sigh as he kicked off his shoes, glancing toward her, not immediately noticing the tension in the air.

"Hey," he mumbled, running a hand through his hair. "I'm home."

Y/n didn’t respond, her gaze locked on him, her lips pressed into a thin line as she clutched the stuffed animal tighter. Her chest ached with the weight of everything unsaid.

He finally noticed her silence, his eyes narrowing in concern. "What’s wrong?" he asked, his voice more annoyed than gentle. He was too tired for this—whatever this was.

She didn’t speak at first, just held out her phone toward him, the screen illuminating her tear-filled eyes. He frowned, walking over to take it from her hand. When he looked at the screen, his expression immediately shifted.

It was a news article—another baseless rumor. His name splashed across the headline alongside another female idol, the two of them speculated to be in a relationship. There were photos from a backstage event, carefully cropped and captioned to imply intimacy where none existed.

He groaned, already dreading the conversation. "You’ve got to be kidding me," he muttered under his breath, tossing the phone onto the coffee table.

"Is this why you’re never around anymore?" Y/n finally spoke, her voice small but laced with hurt. Her eyes, shining with unshed tears, held a mixture of frustration, sadness, and fear. "Because of her?"

His jaw clenched, frustration quickly overtaking his fatigue. "What? No. It’s just a rumor," he snapped, throwing his hands up. "You really believe that crap? I told you not to pay attention to those things."

"But you’re never here anymore!" Her voice cracked as she stood up, still hugging the stuffed cat to her chest. "You’re always too busy, too tired, or too... distant. And then I see this and—" She broke off, shaking her head, tears spilling over now. "How am I supposed to feel? Am I supposed to just ignore it when you’re gone all the time?"

"I’m working!" he fired back, the anger rising in his chest. "I’m busting my ass for this career, for us—but you’re here, worried about some stupid tabloid story? Where’s the trust?"

"Trust?" she repeated, incredulous. "How can I trust you when you don’t even talk to me anymore? When you don’t make time for me at all? Do you even care about this relationship?"

Her words cut deep, but his frustration was too overwhelming to process the hurt beneath them. "Of course I care! But you’re suffocating me with all these doubts. Every time I come home, it’s something like this. You worry too much."

"I worry because I care!" Her voice broke, raw with emotion. "Because I love you, and I feel like I’m losing you—like you’re slipping away and I can’t do anything about it."

The silence that followed was deafening. They stood there, staring at each other, both breathing heavily from the intensity of the argument.

Taesan rubbed his temples, his voice lowering but still tense. "This is ridiculous. It’s just a rumor. I’m tired, and I don’t want to do this right now."

"You never want to do this," she whispered, her voice barely audible. She wiped her tears with the back of her hand, her chest heaving as she tried to control the sobs threatening to spill over. "Fine."

With a quiet, bitter laugh, she turned and walked toward their bedroom. "I’m done with this conversation. Go sleep at your dorm or wherever it is you’d rather be."

His eyes followed her as she disappeared down the hallway, her door closing softly behind her, though the emotional slam still reverberated through him.

He stood there for a long moment, his anger simmering down into guilt, exhaustion pulling at him from all sides. He didn’t want to fight, but it always seemed to end up this way. They always ended up like this—torn apart by his career, by misunderstandings, by everything he didn’t have time to fix.

With a heavy sigh, Taesan grabbed his jacket and keys, heading back toward the door. The silence of the apartment felt unbearable now.

As he stepped out into the cold night air, he shoved his hands into his pockets and walked toward his group’s dorm, his mind filled with everything left unsaid, wondering how they had come to this.

☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★

When the stars in the sky all sleep, I feel so dark, my body feels inexplicably cold

The night air was heavy, thick with a silence that seemed to press down on everything. The small park near their apartment was a place once filled with memories—their late-night walks, quiet conversations, stolen moments—but now it felt distant, like something from another lifetime.

Taesan stood at the edge of the path, hands shoved deep into his pockets, his breath visible in the cool air. He hadn’t been back here in weeks, not since he’d started staying at his group’s dorm. It felt strange now, almost foreign.

His eyes shifted as he saw Y/n approaching slowly from the other side of the park. His heart clenched at the sight of her, though he couldn’t quite place why. She looked…different. Her face was pale, her eyes hollow, the dark bags beneath them evident even in the dim light. The spark, the warmth he always loved in her eyes, was gone. She looked like someone who had been carrying the weight of the world for too long.

She stopped a few steps away from him, the space between them feeling like a chasm.

“What did you want to talk about?” he asked, his voice quiet but carrying an edge of tension. He already had a sinking feeling in his chest, but he wasn’t ready to confront it.

Y/n looked at him for a long moment, her lips parting as if to speak, but no words came out at first. She shifted her weight, wrapping her arms around herself like she was trying to hold herself together.

"I’m tired," she finally said, her voice flat, void of emotion. "I’m tired of waiting for you. Of waiting for us to feel like it used to." Her eyes met his, and the emptiness in them hit him like a punch to the gut. "I can’t keep doing this."

His heart stuttered in his chest, but he didn’t say anything. He just stared at her, trying to process her words, hoping this wasn’t what he thought it was.

“I’m done,” she continued, her voice firmer this time, as if she had rehearsed these words over and over in her head before finally saying them. “I don’t want to have to keep waiting on you, waiting for something to change. I feel like I’m always waiting.”

The silence between them was unbearable now, but he couldn’t find the right words to say. His throat felt tight, like any response he tried to form would only come out broken.

She wasn’t crying—there were no tears. She wasn’t angry. Just…done. It made it worse somehow. He would’ve preferred her to scream at him, to be angry, to throw something, but this quiet resignation was shattering him in a way he hadn’t expected.

“You’re not the same,” she whispered, her voice barely audible but sharp enough to cut through the air between them. "I don’t recognize you anymore. And I know you’re tired too. Tired of me, of this... You don’t need to say it. I can see it every time you walk out the door and don’t come back until late or not at all."

He wanted to protest, to tell her she was wrong, that things could be different, but the words wouldn’t come. Maybe because a part of him knew she was right. He hadn’t been present—not really. His career had consumed him, and in the process, he had let her slip away. He let them slip away.

She let out a shaky breath, her eyes momentarily glancing down at the ground before meeting his gaze again. "I loved you," she said softly. "I still do, but I can’t keep holding onto something that’s already gone."

His chest tightened painfully, and he took a small step forward, as if to reach for her, but stopped himself. He didn’t know how to fix this. He didn’t even know if he could.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered, though it was unclear if she was apologizing to him or to herself.

And then, she turned around, her figure illuminated only by the faint glow of the park’s streetlights. She didn’t run. She didn’t storm off. She just walked away, her back to him, her shoulders slightly hunched as if the weight of everything was too much to bear.

He stood there, frozen in place, his heart breaking with every step she took. His mouth opened, but no words came out. He could only watch as she walked further and further away, her silhouette fading into the distance until she was nothing more than a distant memory in the night.

The cold settled into his bones, but he didn’t move. He couldn’t. He felt numb, like everything inside him had shattered and there was nothing left but the aching emptiness where she used to be. The night stretched on, and the only sound that filled the silence was the faint rustling of leaves in the wind, as the world around him continued on, unaware that his had just fallen apart.

☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★

I don’t need the hottest and best car.

I don’t need to be the best pop star.

I want to express myself, but I messed up.

What’s there to lose! My heart’s already half empty.

The studio’s lights were harsh, reflecting off the mirrors that lined the walls. The steady beat of the music thumped through the room, filling the space with energy, but Taesan’s movements felt sluggish, disconnected from the rhythm. He was usually so precise, so in sync with the choreography, but today he couldn’t seem to get it right.

"Again," the instructor called out, clapping their hands sharply, frustration seeping into their voice. "You’re off, Taesan. Focus."

He nodded, wiping the sweat from his brow, though it felt like the sweat wasn’t the problem—it was the weight pressing on his chest. They started the routine again, but halfway through, his steps faltered. His foot missed the mark, his body off-beat. He felt his group members glance at him in concern, but he kept his head down, trying to push through.

"Stop!" the instructor barked, cutting the music abruptly. "Take five. Taesan, get it together."

He didn’t respond, just stood there, panting, his hands on his knees. The others slowly moved to the sides of the room to grab water or stretch. Taesan didn’t move. His mind was spinning, but not about the dance. His thoughts kept drifting to her—Y/n. The look on her face when she walked away, the sound of her voice when she said she was done, the quiet resignation in her eyes. It haunted him.

It was all he could think about.

He pressed his palms against his eyes, trying to clear his head, but it was no use. The more he tried to shake it off, the more the memories flooded back. The last argument, the tension that had been building for months, how he had shrugged her off when she needed him most.

“Hey, man. You good?” Jaehyun asked, cautiously approaching him with a bottle of water in hand.

Taesan shook his head slightly, forcing a deep breath. “I’m fine,” he muttered, though the tightness in his voice said otherwise.

“You’re not,” Leehan said bluntly, walking over with the rest of the group. "You’ve been off all day. What’s going on?"

He opened his mouth to respond with something dismissive, something to brush them off like he always did when things got too personal, but this time, he couldn’t. His chest ached too much. The guilt, the regret—it was all bubbling up inside him, and he couldn’t keep it down any longer.

“I—” His voice cracked, and he quickly looked away, swallowing hard. He hated this. Hated feeling this vulnerable, especially in front of them.

His group members exchanged glances, clearly worried.

“I miss her,” he finally whispered, barely audible.

“What?” Riwoo leaned in closer, frowning.

“I miss her,” he repeated, louder this time, though his voice wavered. “I miss Y/n… so much.”

The room fell into a heavy silence, the usual energy drained as his words settled in.

“I screwed up,” he said, his hands trembling slightly as he raked them through his hair. “I didn’t realize what I had until she was gone. And now—” He paused, his throat tightening, the memories of their breakup flashing in his mind. “Now it’s too late. I hurt her, I wasn’t there when she needed me, and she left. I don’t blame her.”

His eyes burned, but he refused to let the tears fall. Not here. Not in front of them.

“I regret everything,” he admitted, his voice strained, raw. “Everything that led to us falling apart. I pushed her away, I was so wrapped up in my own life that I didn’t see how much I was losing her.” His hand clenched into a fist. "I thought I could balance everything, but… I couldn’t. I failed her.”

His group members stood in stunned silence. Taesan was always the one who kept things together, the one who didn’t let his emotions get the better of him. Seeing him like this, so vulnerable, so broken, was a shock.

“I don’t know how to fix it,” he continued, his voice barely above a whisper now. “I don’t think I can. She’s done with me, and I can’t blame her. I’ve been a terrible boyfriend… and a terrible person.”

Sungho stepped closer, resting a hand on his shoulder. “Hey, man, don’t say that.”

“It’s the truth,” he said bitterly, looking down at the floor. “I still love her. I never stopped. But she’s gone, and it’s all my fault.”

“You’re human, Taesan hyung,” Woonhak said, his tone gentle. “People make mistakes.”

“Not like this,” Taesan muttered, shaking his head. “She waited for me. She was patient, and I took her for granted. I should’ve been there for her.”

His group members shared worried glances, unsure of what to say. They had never seen him like this—so lost, so regretful.

“It’s not too late,” Jaehyun offered hesitantly. “You can still reach out to her, talk to her—”

“She’s done with me,” Taesan interrupted, his voice flat. “She said she’s tired of waiting, and I can’t blame her. I would’ve left me too.”

He slumped down onto the floor, leaning against the mirrored wall, his head in his hands. The silence stretched on for what felt like forever, the only sound being the faint hum of the air conditioning in the studio.

His group members sat down around him, unsure of how to help, but unwilling to leave him alone. They could see how much pain he was in, and it hurt to see their usually composed, confident friend in pieces like this.

“I’m sorry,” Taesan whispered again, more to himself than anyone else. "I’m so sorry, Y/n."

And for the first time in a long time, he let the tears fall.

☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★

Through the whole night, you’re no longer in my sight.

Maybe everyone feels the same, but time goes by too fast.

The air backstage was charged with excitement, a low hum of activity as the staff rushed around making final preparations. Taesan sat quietly in a corner, his hands resting on his lap, staring at the floor as the muffled cheers of the crowd reached his ears. The energy of the arena was palpable, but inside, he felt a familiar weight pressing down on his chest.

It had been a few months since the breakup. Since the day she’d said she was done. He hadn’t realized how hard it would hit him—how much he’d miss her. Even now, the thought of her still tugged at his heart, the hurt still raw even though time had passed.

"Taesan, you good?" Sungho asked, breaking through his thoughts as they finished a huddle nearby.

He glanced up, forcing a small smile. "Yeah, I’m fine."

They’d asked him that a lot lately, and every time he said the same thing. He had to be fine. He had no other choice. Being an idol meant putting on a perfect face, no matter what was going on behind the scenes. It was all part of the job, and he owed it to his fans to give them everything he had. But the truth was, no matter how much time passed, she never really left his mind.

A staff member approached, headset in place, clipboard in hand. "Five minutes until showtime."

His group gave a collective nod, standing up to stretch and prepare. Taesan rose to his feet, brushing off his outfit, and took a deep breath. He could feel the adrenaline starting to build, the anticipation of the stage waiting for him. This was his world now—his stage, his music, his fans. He had to focus on that.

But as his mind drifted back to her—her smile, the sound of her laugh, the way she used to wait up for him—his chest tightened again. The ache that hadn’t fully healed throbbed beneath the surface, a constant reminder of what he’d lost.

"Focus," he whispered to himself, closing his eyes for a moment. He couldn’t let this affect him now. Not here. Not when the world was watching.

The fans were already screaming, chanting their names, and he knew the second he stepped onto that stage, he had to be the idol they all adored—the one who smiled for them, who gave them his all, no matter what was happening in his personal life.

A deep breath. He opened his eyes as the staff gave the signal.

“It’s time,” one of his group members said, nudging him gently. "Let’s go."

He nodded, shaking off the last traces of his wandering thoughts. Putting on his best smile—the smile that had charmed millions—he stepped in line with his group as they prepared to walk onto the stage.

The music swelled through the speakers, and the moment the curtains parted, a wave of sound crashed over them. The roar of the crowd, the flashing lights, the sea of fans waving lightsticks—it was everything he’d worked for, everything he loved.

He couldn’t let them down.

As they walked out, the fans’ cheers grew louder, the energy electric. He felt it surge through him, pushing the heaviness of his emotions to the back of his mind. The stage was where he belonged, and for now, that had to be enough.

But even as he smiled, danced, and sang, giving his all to the performance, a part of him still carried her with him—her memory, her absence. He knew he had to move on, but it wasn’t that simple. She had been a part of him for so long, and the love he had for her didn’t just disappear. He was still learning how to live with that ache.

As the music thumped in his ears and the fans sang along to every word, he forced himself to be present, to let the performance carry him. But every now and then, between the beats, he could feel her shadow lingering in the back of his mind.

And when the concert was over, and the adrenaline faded, he knew she’d be there waiting in the back of his mind—just as she always had been.

☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★

Finally, the wounds have scabbed over, but am I still thinking about it?

The room was dimly lit by the slivers of moonlight that slipped through the half-drawn blinds. The quiet hum of the air conditioner was the only sound breaking the silence of the night. Taesan lay in bed, staring up at the ceiling with a contemplative expression. The shadows cast by the moonlight danced across the walls, but his focus remained on the blank expanse above him.

He was in his shared dorm room with Woonhak, who was already fast asleep, snoring softly. Taesan had been lying awake for hours, his mind racing through thoughts he couldn’t seem to quiet.

It had been five months since the breakup. He had made significant progress—he wasn’t as heartbroken as he once was, and his days were filled with the busyness of his idol life. But despite all that, thoughts of Y/n still occupied a corner of his mind.

He wondered about her often. What was she doing now? Was she happier without him? Was she moving on with her life, creating new memories, and finding joy in things that didn’t include him? The questions lingered, and even though he tried to push them away, they always seemed to return.

He remembered their last conversation, the look in her eyes when she had ended things. It wasn’t anger or resentment but a calm, resolute sadness. He had always wished he could go back and fix things, do better, be the person she deserved.

Turning his head slightly, he glanced over at the small bedside clock—it was well past midnight. He sighed, running a hand through his hair as he shifted uncomfortably. The ache of missing her wasn’t as sharp as it once was, but it was still there, a gentle, persistent throb that reminded him of the love they had shared.

He recalled the little moments they had—walking in the park, sharing secrets, the way she used to laugh at his jokes, the sparkle in her eyes when she listened to his songs. Those memories were bittersweet now, tinged with the sadness of knowing that those times were in the past.

He wondered if she ever thought about him. Did she ever look back and remember the good times? Did she ever miss him, even just a little? The curiosity gnawed at him, but he didn’t have any answers. He had made the decision to give her space, to let her heal and move on, but it didn’t make the longing any easier.

He closed his eyes, imagining what it would be like to see her again, to talk to her, to hear her voice. He hoped that wherever she was, she was happy. He hoped she had found the peace and joy that they both deserved.

As he lay there, the weight of his thoughts became a little heavier. He had learned to live with the separation, to accept it as part of his journey, but that didn’t mean it was easy. The nights like these were the hardest—when the world was quiet, and the only thing he had was the memory of what once was.

Eventually, he forced himself to turn away from the ceiling, pulling the covers closer as he tried to settle into a more comfortable position. It was a futile attempt to silence his racing mind, but he knew that some things would take time to fully resolve.

For now, he would focus on his work, on the present, and try to hold onto the hope that things would get better. And maybe, just maybe, someday he would get the closure he needed. Until then, he would carry on, living his life while cherishing the memories of what they once had.

He finally drifted off to sleep, the thoughts of her slowly fading into the background, though never completely out of reach.

☆⋆｡𖦹°‧★

I realize I can live without you, but I once decided to grow old with you.

How much loneliness and struggle remain pierced in my heart.

The crisp autumn air was cool against his skin as Taesan and his group members strolled down the street. Their faces were concealed behind masks and sunglasses, a necessary precaution to avoid being recognized. Despite their disguises, the atmosphere was relaxed, and they enjoyed the rare chance to go out incognito.

They chatted casually, their conversation punctuated by laughter as they approached a quaint café they had heard good things about. The cozy little place had a warm glow that contrasted with the chilly evening air.

As they reached the entrance, Taesan was the last to go inside. Just as he was about to cross the threshold, the door swung open and someone bumped into him.

Startled, he looked down, his heart skipping a beat when he saw who it was.

It was her. Y/n.

She looked different—brighter, happier. Her hair was shorter, framing her face in a way that seemed to enhance her natural beauty. And her eyes—those eyes that used to be so full of sadness—were now sparkling with a joy he hadn’t seen in a long time.

They locked eyes for a split second, and he felt a pang of something he couldn’t quite place—hope, regret, longing. He stood frozen, caught between the urge to speak and the overwhelming surge of emotions.

“Oh, I’m so sorry!” she exclaimed, her voice warm and apologetic as she quickly stepped back. She didn’t seem to recognize him, her focus more on the minor collision than on the person she bumped into.

“No problem,” he managed to say, his voice barely above a whisper.

She flashed him a quick, polite smile before turning and walking away, her figure gradually diminishing as she moved down the street.

Taesan stood there, watching her retreat, his heart pounding. The moment felt surreal—seeing her like this, so changed, so content. It was as if the universe had given him one more chance to make things right, and he wasn’t sure if he should let it slip away.

“Hey, what’s taking you so long?” Riwoo called out from inside the café. “Let’s go!”

Still reeling from the encounter, Taesan snapped back to reality. He turned towards the café, where his friends waited, but something inside him urged him to follow her—to find out if this new version of her was truly as happy as she seemed.

Without a word, he pulled his mask and glasses off and turned on his heel, rushing out of the café. His group members called after him, confusion evident in their voices, but he ignored them, his focus entirely on the woman who had just walked away.

He sprinted down the street, glancing around, his heart racing as he searched for any sign of her. The sight of her figure, walking away with a spring in her step, seemed to guide him forward, pushing him to bridge the gap that had grown between them.

Every step felt heavy with anticipation, each breath a mix of excitement and anxiety. He didn’t know what he’d say or what he hoped to find, but he couldn’t shake the feeling that this was a chance he couldn’t let slip by.

Finally, he spotted her again, standing on the corner, waiting for a bus. With a deep breath, he approached, trying to steady his racing heart.

“Y/n!” he called out, trying to keep his voice calm and steady.

She turned, a look of surprise crossing her face as she recognized the urgency in his voice. Her eyes widened as they met his, and for a moment, time seemed to stand still. Everything around them seemed to disappear and it was only them there. Y/n’s look of surprise turns into a smile, her sparkling eyes meeting him.

“Hi.”

★🎸🎧⋆｡ °⋆

PART TWO VER.1 -- VER.2 | MASTERLIST

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