#and i will probably regret it but who cares

[miaoua3]

Be My Sin.

Pairing: priest!joshua x stripper!f!reader

Genre: smut (MDNI), piv sex, oral sex (f! receiving), religious trauma/inner conflict, slight angst from joshua’s side (thoughts about regret, religion and such), stripper x priest, virgin! joshua

Warnings: mentions of r@pe and p€dophilia as the reason why joshua’s faith in god is wavering, and once again, smut (MDNI)

Description: after years of being a priest, joshua starts questioning his faith in god after receiving some upsetting news. what was supposed to be a walk to clear his mind ends up being a walk straight to his most delicious sin-you.

Note: THIS IS FOR MY POOKS EAT UP HOE (also keep in mind that a lot of thoughts on religion may or may not reflect my own thoughts about it lol). another note: i really said porn WITH plot lmao this one is looong boys, buckle up.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

it must’ve been two hours already since the bartender slid a whiskey neat across the counter and towards joshua. and for the past two hours, joshua has just been staring at the glass and how the low light of the bar has been reflecting in the dark liquor, thinking if he should give into the temptation and break his promise that he made to god, or if he should just get up and leave.

in the 12 years of his life as a priest, joshua has never been more confused, angry and scared like he has been since he heard the news this morning.

joshua takes ahold of the glass and spins it around, and just….thinks.

should he or should he not?

at this point, the whiskey has gone warm, probably not even in the drinkable state anymore, but he wouldn’t care about it.

as long as it makes him forget this whole day today, he’s willing to down even poison.

being betrayed by a friend always hurt him the most. it’s sad, really, feeling pity and disappointment towards the people you once felt nothing but love and affection for.

but this…this is much more than just betrayal.

this is his friend going against everything they have been taught while on their path to become priests.

his friend since childhood, who inspired him to do better and devote his life to spirituality, who guided him towards being a better person.

he was charged with sexual assault of a young girl.

she is only 7 years old.

a bile starts rising up joshua’s throat the more he thinks about it, how he trusted him and saw him as some form of a hero. and so, before he can even think about it, in hopes that it will stop him from indecency that is puking in the bar, joshua picks up the glass and downs the whiskey in one, breaking his sobriety of almost 15 years.

the liquor burns his throat, the aftertaste on his tongue not all that pleasant, it actually makes him scrunch his face in disgust.

joshua then raises a hand and orders another one.

and another one.

and another one.

he stops counting how many he orders after that.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

joshua is stumbling over his feet as he drunkenly walks on the side walk, observing the pretty city lights and cars as they pass him by. he isn’t sure where he’s headed, letting his absent mind take him wherever it wants.

after the bartender called the last call, he thought that a walk would help him clear his mind. so, after paying for all his drinks, he just…started walking. and he hasn’t stopped for an hour now.

he stumbles as he tries to stop and look at the window of a shop that sells mostly technology, a bunch of tv’s on display behind the window.

he stops to look at whatever ads are being shown on the screen, vision blurry and hazy due to the insane amount of alcohol that is in his blood right now.

his eyebrows immediately scrunch in pain at the pictures that are being shown to him, his hand unconsciously coming up to rub his chest right where his heart is over his black shirt.

bunch of children just running around in slow motion, happy smiles and missing teeth the only things joshua’s mind can focus on.

this is what children should look like, happy and carefree. how could anyone even think about doing things so atrocious and vile to them, like he did? how can anyone harm the ones who least deserve it, who are nothing but pure and innocent?

there’s nothing joshua loved more than when children would come up to him after the sermons and talk to him, seeing children being so curious and mildly confused about the complex that is a religion. it always made him so happy to explain them the things they would ask about in the most simplistic way possible, sometimes even struggling to find the right words to explain things as to not make them even more confused.

seeing the good in people, especially in the young ones, always made his heart swell up with hope and love towards them.

now he isn’t even sure if there’s any hope left in his heart, only rage and hurt floating on the surface of it.

he watches the tv’s for another minute or so, overcome by the thoughts of the terrible day that he it has been today, from the moment he got the news this morning, him struggling to get through the morning sermon, turning away people that wanted to go to the confessionals to him and get the heavy stuff off their hearts, all the way to him downing the alcohol as if it were water.

finally turning away from the window of the shop, joshua attempts to start walking again, stumbling only minimally, only to come to a stop yet again as a wave of nausea hits him.

his hand shots out automatically to grab onto the street light, closing his eyes as he tries to focus on not spilling out his guts right on the middle of the sidewalk.

he’s taking deep breaths in and out when he hears some loud voices from across the street, drunken laughter mixed with it. he opens his eyes to look at what it might be.

a tall old building stares back at him, the bottom part littered with glaring neon signs, one in particular catching his attention. a silhouette of a woman in a martini glass, one leg kicked up to show off her high heel, hands thrown in the air as to signify that she’s having a good time.

huh. a strip club.

normal and sober joshua would never admit this out loud-or while alive for that matter, considering his profession- but he was always a bit curious about strip clubs. naturally, he has met his fair share of sex workers, he even helped a few of them get from troublesome situations where they were being threatened or abused, always ready to help anyone in need regardless of their background and/or profession.

he has never been in one though, as he had no reason to go.

his bloody eyes watch as a white convertible rolls up to the club, parks and turns the lights off. and then, like some sort of angel, steps out what he can only describe as the most beautiful woman he has ever laid his eyes on, all short skirts and tops, hair swishing around as she turns her head while she locks the doors of her car, before she proceeds to walk up the stairs and inside the building, disappearing as easily as she appeared.

joshua swallows harshly, unsure if his throat is dry due to the hot summer night that he finds himself in or because of the woman that just made him realise that heaven was more than just a place that he will officially never see.

before he can rationalise his thoughts, his legs start moving all on their own, walking across the street (and almost getting hit by a car that he didn’t see in the process) and through the door of the strip club.

he never had a reason to go inside a place like this, right?

well, one reason was just found.

he struggles as he walks through that type of curtain that is made out of beedy tussles, almost choking himself with one as he tries to get it out of his face.

the scene in front of him makes him freeze in his place, gulping heavily due to unfamiliarity of it all.

in the centre laid a stage in a shape of a martini glass, just like in the front. on both sides of the stage there were many leather chairs, the kind that you can just hear squeaking under your ass simply by looking at it. a part of the stage was covered by red curtains, the type that you can just tell are heavy and velvety to the touch. above that, on the wall, hung another neon sign.

angel’s heaven.

how ironic.

joshua walks to the left, where a bar with a few busy bartenders can be seen, patiently waiting on his turn to order.

before you ask- only water for him from now on.

he wants to remember everything he’s about to see.

as he waits, he can feel the people judgementally looking at him because of the uniform that he has yet to give a fuck about, the roman collar poking at his neck even after years of wearing it, the black shirt and pants making him look at least a bit presentable.

when his turn finally comes, he orders himself a water, drowning it in one go before he shyly asks for another glass.

as he pushes through the mass of people, he finally comes to where the leather chairs are. he decides to stay standing as it gives him a much better view of the stage.

just as he was turning his head left and right to look around, joshua notices the lights dimming around him and shining brighter on the stage, making it the main point of the room.

suddenly, some sexy jazz music starts playing, the kind where you find yourself imitating the sound of the trumpets. the red curtains get pulled to the sides harshly, revealing 4 figures behind it.

only then is the setup shown to the audience, the neon sign outside making much more sense now that joshua can see two gigantic martini glasses with a stepping stool on sides of it. in between them there are two tall poles.

joshua watches as two women on the ends carefully yet sexily climb the stepping stools so they can get into the martini glasses, making the liquid inside it splash on the sides. while they are trying their best to make it as sexy as possible to get into gigantic glasses, another two women present themselves to the public, wearing lacy and ever so sexily red lingerie.

men around him start to whistle and cheer, the one closest to the stage already throwing dollar bills at them, but joshua can only focus on one of the women that is on one of the poles, swaying her body, hips and hair to the jazzy rhythm.

you. the woman from earlier.

the reason for his sin.

he watches carefully as you wrap one leg around the pole, spinning gently and artistically, your hair swishing behind you. he gulps when you stop spinning, only to get down on your knees and let yourself to sort of dive into the floor, your chest touching the floor, your position giving the audience a beautiful view of your ass cladded in the red lacy panties.

joshua isn't sure if the other woman next to you is doing the same moves as you because his eyes, mind and desires are solely focused on you, but by the cheers of the men, he can only guess that she is.

he continues to watch with a weird feeling climbing up his stomach as you pull yourself back up, staying on your knees as you tilt your head back and play with your hair, your tits moving up and down as you intentionally inhale and exhale extra hard, slowly bouncing on your knees.

you then get back up to your feet-still as sexily as possible-your smile blinding the men in the chairs, and joshua too. you turn around to give men an even better view of your ass as you sway it to the music.

joshua has to remind himself to breathe again, air trapped inside his throat, only noticing it due to getting a bit lightheaded.

but that just might be the alcohol.

or you.

the cheers continue as you and your partner spin on the poles, throwing money and words like ''yeah baby, spin that ass! take that bra off!'', making joshua only mildly uneasy and annoyed, maybe even a bit jealous.

the show continues for half an hour, closer to 40 minutes, and joshua watches you and only you the entire time. at the end, you and the other stripper do the last spins before you slowly come to the stop, slowly stepping on your feet as the music cuts off.

the cheerful screams suddenly turn into those of slight disappointment as the two women (who joshua hasn't even looked at once) step out of the big martini glasses, to join you and your partner for the final bow. while you wait, you scan the crowd for the potential customers for one-on-one sessions, smiling and waving a bit to the ends who scream for you, when you suddenly notice in the far back, watching you with mouth agape, the most beautiful face you have ever seen illuminated under the neon lights of the club, his cheeks noticeably rosy even from a distance.

and then you notice his attire.

huh. a priest.

how ironic.

as you smile at him, both with certain gentleness and sinisterness, joshua's heart drops to his feet.

oh how much fun are you going to have with him.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

joshua never walked faster in his life, tripping tipsily over his legs as he reaches the bar he ordered his water from.

the second he’s in front of a bartender, he’s slamming his hand against the bar to balance himself up, and with desperate eyes asking the bartender “how do i get into the vip? are there private sessions with the dancers? private rooms maybe? how much would something like that cost? actually never mind, i’d pay however much it costs-“.

the bartender just looks at him with a raised eyebrow, waiting for joshua to realise that his rambling is a bit distasteful as well as embarrassing.

as it registers in his brain just how judgementally the bartender is looking at him, making him blush a little in embarrassment, shyly whispering “I apologise”.

seeing that he’s finished with the rambling, the bartender explains “there is vip section but that is for groups of 4 or more, so i’m guessing you are not interested in that.”

joshua just nods along, waiting for him to get to the part that he wants to hear about.

the bartender then continues “we also have private rooms for one-on-one sessions. you can pick the dancer, but if they’re busy with another customer or with the vip section, you can either wait for them to be done or request another dancer.-“

having heard enough, joshua interrupts him “is the pretty dancer-the-the one on the right pole-is she free? nobody booked her already, right?"

the bartender yet again gives joshua an are you serious right now? look, prompting joshua to look down bashfully, mumbling yet another "i apologise", scratching the back of his neck due to the awkwardness that has ensued.

seeing that he can speak freely again, the bartender continues "yes she is free, would you like me to book you a session with her?"

joshua nods enthusiastically, eyes shining brightly both due to the alcohol and excitement.

after paying for a double session, joshua follows the instructions given by the bartender and walks straight ahead until he reaches a hallway, where he turns right and enters the third door on the left side.

the room is isolated from top to bottom in some sort of leather material, probably as a way to sound proof the room of...everything and anything that might go on in it. in the centre of the room, there is a black, circular table with a pole going right through it. right in front of it stood a noticeably low black leather chair, intended for the customers, joshua assumes.

with unsure steps, joshua walks over to the chair before he takes a seat, looking around and observing the very weird room.

suddenly, the door that he has just walked through open, revealing your beautiful self wrapped in a silky white robe. joshua's breath catches in his throat upon seeing the sight in front of him, how beautiful you look so up close, how you radiate absolute confidence and effortless sexiness.

you look down at the chair only to see joshua in it, a smirk immediately appearing on your face.

"well aren't you a fast one, father. or should i say...", you pause for a moment to take a few more steps and grab the chair, leaning across the chair until your lips are right by his ear, the smirk spreading by every passing second.

"...daddy?", you finish, barely containing your cackling.

joshua just makes a face of disgust, if you were to look up the definition of the word "ew", you'd see his face right next to it instead of a complicated sentence.

expressing as much, joshua ushers out "ew, no, don't call me that, that's just- yeah no.", finishing his rant with a full body shiver.

cackling at his reaction, you proceed to walk over to the table. before sitting down on it, you quickly take off your robe and throw it somewhere to the side, beyond caring about it this far in your career.

joshua gulps as he sees you sitting on the table right in front of him, your red heel grazing his pants as you go to cross it. he tries really reaaally hard not to look at your exposed skin and how the lingerie clings to your skin. force of habit maybe? or maybe he's clinging onto the little hope he had left in himsef.

chuckling at his behaviour, how skittish he was, wiggling around his chair and looking away, all while redness greeted his cute cheeks, you start questioning him.

"so, father, what brings you here?", you tilt your head as you look at him, waiting for an answer.

joshua finally looks back at you, making it very evident that he's focusing on your face only. gulping yet again, he answers "just...thought i'd come and see what a-a place like thi-this would look like-", but before he can finish the sentence, you interrupt him.

"that's not what i meant."

joshua looks startled and confused, looking at you questioningly.

smiling a little at him, you stand up before him and come closer, your legs parting his own. joshua's eyes bulge out of its sockets so much that they look like they're about to fall out any second. his eyes follow the silhouette of your body-starting at the legs, and how glowy and shiny they looked under the blue light of the room. next were the hips that were right in front of his face. joshua had to swallow harshly as he eyed the red underwear hugging your lower body-the lacy material, how see-through it was. unintentionally he paid extra attention to your tummy and how cute it looked to him-somehow it made you look more human.

finally, his eyes skim over your tits, just briefly however, before he finally comes to look you in the eyes again.

you smile at his flustered expression, tucking a bit of hair behind your ear. using the free space between his legs, you place on of your knees there, his half hard crotch already pressing against it. grabbing the chair right by where joshua's head is, ever so slowly you lean in until your noses are almost touching.

with your eyes locked now, you whisper in the little space between you two.

"what are you doing here, in my room?"

it takes joshua a bit to find his words due to being absolutely and incandescently in awe of you. his eyes are flying all over your face, taking in your beauty. if somebody were to watch the scene unfold from the sidelines, they would think that joshua might be in love.

with earnestness swimming in his eyes, he looks you directly in the eyes as he stutters out "because you are the most beautiful woman i have ever seen in my life. i just...i had to."

his response evidently stunts you, because the gentle smile from your lips slowly fades away, something between amazement and dumbstruck appearing in your eyes instead.

nobody has ever said something so...nice to me.

and you look. you look and you search in his eyes. for doubt. for earnestness. for honesty.

placing a hand on his cheek, you whisper ever so quietly.

"i'm going to kiss you now."

not giving him the time to overthink it, you lean in and gently kiss his lips. joshua, in return, starts feeling like he's having a heart attack, but doesn't pull away.

only a fool would pull away from the most beautiful women's kiss.

once you let your kiss naturally fall apart, joshua just blinks at you, his whole face red and his eyes as big as saucers.

you place the other hand on his other cheek as well, leaning your forehead against his. rubbing his cheeks to calm him down, you whisper "touch me, don't be shy" before you kiss his pouty lips again.

the man in question responds to your kisses but makes it evident that he's a bit unsure, a bit scared, and that he's letting you take control and lead the pace of the kiss.

after a minute or so of your kissing, of your tongue invading his mouth, of gently biting his lower lip to tease him and so that you can hear that little noise of surprise leaving his mouth, joshua finally places his hands on the back of your thighs-gently, of course. instead of grabbing them and using his hold to pull you onto his lap like you want him to, he just...hold them there, kind of like he's supporting them in case they might give out beneath you.

not liking this, you bite his lip again, this time a bit harder, sort of as a warning, before you pull away to look him in the eyes as you say one word only. one word that will unravel the true beast within him.

"harder."

just like a light switch, something changes in his eyes, before he grabs the back of your thighs harshly and leaning back in to kiss you like a starved man would.

his kiss is bruising, and it hurts you so good-the way his lips perfectly wrap around your own, the way his tongue dances and battles for dominance against your own, the way his hand squeeze and release your thighs periodically.

everything he does hurts you so good and deliciously.

sensing that you leaning down like this might be a bit uncomfortable for you, he uses his hold on your legs to pull you towards him, making you straddle him.

getting his cue, you oblige happily, sitting yourself on his lap, maybe but just maybe wiggling a bit on his lap to tease him, which seems to go exactly according to your plan. his hands immediately grab onto your bare ass, squeezing so hard, like he's trying to ground himself, to anchor himself, all while moaning directly in your mouth.

being naturally moved by his hands on your body, you unconsciously start rocking your hips back and forth, making joshua squeeze your ass cheeks even harder, to an almost bruising degree.

suddenly, a thought strikes you like a lighting making you part your lips with the man beneath you.

joshua just looks at you, somewhat scared, somewhat questioningly. but before he can start puking out all of his questions, you tilt your head to the side as you ask him.

"i never asked for your name, and i imagine you wouldn't like me calling you father the entire time, so. what is it?"

joshua just blinks for a few seconds before he answers "joshua, my name is joshua."

you smile at his words before you grab the back of his hair, making the man drop his mouth open as he moans at your action.

smirking directly against his lips, you compliment him "good boy", before you are kissing him to the degree of insanity.

using the newfound knowledge that pulling his hair does it for him, you use the hold on his hair to push and pull his head in directions that you want him to so you can kiss him under all the possible degrees there are. tilting his head to the left, you let your tongue battle against his own. he tries to put up a fight, but inevitably loses the moment you pull his hair even more.

somewhere between the minutes of being lost in your kisses, joshua starts rocking his own hips upwards, right into your barely covered crotch. just as he realises what he's doing and is about to pull away and apologise, you moan needily in his mouth, pressing your hips stronger against his own.

finally having had enough of his gentlemen-ess, you grab one of his hands from your ass only to push it in your own underwear.

joshua gasps at the action, blushing like crazy. looking you directly in the eyes, you just respond to his visible doubt.

"stop being a gentlemen and fuck me already."

....well.

still holding back a bit, joshua starts off slowly, rubbing his fingers over....something. considering that he has never done any of this, joshua is proud of himself for even being in this position in general. he always thought that...sex will always remain an unexplored territory, considering that he's a priest and all.

having sensed that joshua has never fingered a woman ever, you pull back, using his knees to balance your hands on.

looking him directly in the eyes, you order him with all seriousness.

"take my panties off."

joshua looks at you like a deer caught in the headlights for a second, before he looks down at your underwear just as confused, wondering how he's supposed to take them off while you are still sitting on his lap.

rolling eyes a bit at this, you help the poor man by adding "rip them off."

cue more startled looking at you.

gently taking the sides of your underwear, joshua exhales before he harshly pulls on the red fabric. it ends up ripping much easier than he thought it would.

huh. maybe he was stronger than he previously thought. or maybe the underwear was just that flimsy.

having been freed of the panties, you come to crowd his personal space again, taking his hand in yours again, making sure to keep the eye contact with him.

"okay, welcome to 'how to finger a woman 101' class. it's not hard math, you just have to know that every woman is different and likes different things, as well as that there are things all women like."

joshua furrows his eyebrows, if this were a cartoon, a question mark would start flying around his head just about now.

instead of explaining what all those things could be, you just bring his hand back to your pussy. you make his fingers spread you open, showing him where the magic happens.

hoarsely, you say against his lips "now i'll teach you what i like."

joshua, ever the good boy, just nods his head, his eyes wide and mouth agape as he exhales shakily.

taking over his fingers and keeping yourself open for him, you nod downwards, to your glossy and wet pussy.

"see the little bundle of top?", joshua looks down and nods when he notices the bundle in question, gulping at the sight beneath him, fingers and mouth itching to get them on you.

"rub it. gently."

joshua's eyes search for permission in your own for a second, only starting once you nod.

he uses his point and middle finger to gently and slowly rub circles on your clit, watching out for your reactions. you exhale slowly, eyes automatically closing the longer he goes on,

"put more pressure. and a bit faster."

as if he were your servant, joshua obliges immediately.

your moans are all the validation he needs, enjoying how it rings in the shell of his ear, how pretty they sound. like a tune that he himself is making.

gradually and mindlessly, joshua applies even more pressure and starts going faster, getting lost in your pretty noises and lust-filled air. he doesn't even know when he starts, but suddenly he notices that his lips are on your neck, licking, kissing and sucking on the skin there.

your moans get louder, which is exactly what joshua wanted. you're getting so lost in the pleasure that you feel the need to grab onto something, or else you fear you might fly away. you search for something to hold on, only finding his hair in return.

pulling on it harshly makes joshua moan loudly against the skin of your neck, his fingers rubbing your clit even harsher, even faster.

"don't stop."

you pull his head even closer, moaning away in his ear, curses and his name mixed with it the faster you approach your end. joshua, in return, doesn't stop what he's doing, just like you tell him. his lips bite your neck harshly, some sort of animalistic urge to mark you, to make you his taking over his mind.

legs squeezing around his, spasming and shaking as you're reaching your orgasm, you almost scream in his ear "fuck! don't sto-ah, i'm cumming, i'm cumm-"

you never get to finish that sentence as your finish interrupts you. throwing your head back, you pull on joshua's hair so harshly he fears he might lose the hair you are pulling on like a maniac.

riding through your orgasm, joshua finally starts slowing down when he notices you running away from his touch. figuring you have came, he finally stops, eyes immediately looking for your approval and review.

forehead coated in sweat, skin glistening, eyes still shut in pleasure-joshua thinks this might be the most beautiful sight he has ever witnessed.

opening your eyes, you smile at his cute expression, with red cheeks and sparkly eyes.

ready to give him a response, you pull his face towards your own, kissing him passionately, relaxing in his hold the moment his arms wrap themselves around your waist.

parting your lips, your hand gently grabs his cheek, rubbing your thumb over his cheek.

looking him directly in the eyes, so he know you mean every word you're about to say, you praise him.

"good boy."

your words setting him off, he immediately goes back in to kiss you, to eat you alive. grabbing your thighs, joshua then stands up while holding you, making you gasp in his mouth.

he lays you not-so gently on the table in front of him (not that you are complainig, you are loving this rough and wild joshua), his mouth biting your lower lip harshly. your nails imbed themselves in his back, pulling on his shirt, trying to pull it off him.

being sick of his own shirt, joshua pulls away to quickly take it off, revealing a surprisingly ripped and muscular build of his.

your breath catches in your throat, mouth salivating to get your hands on him.

grabbing the front of his pants, you pull him harshly towards you. taken aback by this move, joshua falls over you, luckily reflexes coming in handy and using his hands to catch himself and not squish you beneath his weight.

you immediately grab his face and pull him back for a wild kiss, his tongue responding enthusiastically to your own entering his mouth. and his hands? oh they have a mind of their own. grabbing your thighs and hiking them up against his hips, before they shamelessly grab your tits, squeezing them over the red material of your bra.

wanting- no, needing to feel them bare, joshua pulls away for a second in favour of ripping your bra from your body, snapping the front of before he pushes it aside.

his mouth immediately wrap themselves around your right nipple, sucking on them like an animal.

you arch your back at the contact, hands grabbing onto his hair harshly as you moan loudly.

letting the boy have his fun for about a minute, enjoying the way he's sucking on your tit, how he lets himself go and bite the skin of it, marking it with the imprint of his teeth. you let him have his fun for about two minutes before you are pulling his hair harshly until his face is in front of your own.

exhaling against his lips, you utter.

"fuck me. now."

normally joshua would kill to do as you say. normally. but the urge to get his lips on your sweet little pussy wins over that.

without answering you, he lowers himself until he is face to face with your lower body, eyes trained to focus on you.

his breath that leaves his mouth grazes the skin of your pussy, goosebumps appearing on your skin as it does.

eyes filled with desire, he says the words that will come to haunt your dreams for years to come.

"teach me how you want it. how you like it."

and then his mouth is on you, starving as ever. his lips-it's like he's trying to make out with your pussy, not afraid of getting messy, his spit dripping down. sucking on the clit, his eyes focus on your face for a reaction. your back arch the longer he keeps sucking and kissing you down there.

hands grabbing onto his hair, you pull onto his hair, almost as if you are trying to get more of him, to get him deeper inside of you.

getting your cue, he lets his tongue prod and explore your entrance for a bit, before he let it fully enter your hole, swirling it around, gathering your taste on it so he can taste you as he swallows.

seeing by your moans that you like it, he replaces his tongue with one finger, slowly pushing it inside of you.

throwing your head back at the feeling of fullness, you moan at the way he pushes the finger in and out of you, slowly twisting it each time. while he fingers you, joshua focuses his lips back again on sucking on your clit, using his tongue to flick it before he wraps his lips around it and suck it.

distinctly joshua registers you moaning "more", which he immediately responds with pushing another finger inside of you.

he keeps on going in a relentless pace, fingers pushing inside of you faster than they pull outside of you. while his fingers are working you, his mouth focuses more on his own pleasure, drinking your juices as if they were honey.

you let him eat you out for a few minutes, let him work out another orgasm out of you. but not only that-you let yourself enjoy, actually enjoy being with a man. a man who, presumingly, has never touched a woman this way before yet does a better job in satisfying you than all those fuck ass, try-hard man in power who only care about themselves.

a man who makes you feel like a woman.

feeling yourself reaching the finish faster than before, you forcefully pull his head, ignoring his hissing in pain, until his mouth are kissing your lips this time.

although his mouth aren't on you anymore, his fingers certainly are, still pushing inside of you at the relentless pace. you basically have to moan out "you had your fun, now fuck me", because joshua certainly wasn't stopping.

seeing as he was almost in a trance, eyes glossy and hazy, you take the situation in your own hands. literally.

grabbing the hem of his pants, you feel his front up in order to find the zipper, feeling up joshua's bulge in the process. finally feeling it, you pull it down to your best abilities, considering that joshua is distracting you with his kisses.

you pull harshly on his pants, just wanting them off of his sexy ass (that you felt up in the process of getting rid of his pants-nice and juicy, you must admit). with his pants you also pull down his black underwear, his dick jumping out freely.

you push joshua's chest a bit so you can actually look down and see his dick.

to say that you are very pleasantly surprised is an understatement. his cock is so...beautiful. with a pinkish tip, it slightly curves to the right. although not the thickest one you have seen, he's still definitely up there, with his size as well.

you take him and you pump him a few times, smiling widely the way joshua's pretty moans fly out of his mouth involuntarily.

guiding his cock to where you need him the most, you hear joshua exhale shakily. in excitement or fear, is the only question.

you put your hand on his cheek, making him focus back on you. looking at him with gentle eyes, you try to reassure him a bit.

"it's okay, if you don't want to, you can still walk away, baby. it'd be a shame, considering i don't see a face this pretty in here that often, never mind between my legs."

joshua weighs his options for a few seconds, but deep deep down, in his soul, he knows what the right answer it.

he has sinned plenty already today, what's one more?

and with that thought, he grabs the base of his cock and starts pushing inside.

after a minute or so, you both moan in unison as he finally bottoms out, his hips flush against your own. joshua has to take a moment to recollect himself and pray to god that he doesn't cum right there right that second with how much you are squeezing him.

your long nails claw at his naked back, sure to leave scratches for tomorrow to be seen. the way he fills you up, the way he makes you feel full and good. it's a little too much for you, it makes you want him even more, and you want him now.

pushing your heels against his ass, you signal to him to start moving which he does.

he starts off slow, taking his time, like he wants to remember it all, to remember you. he rocks his hips against your own so deliciously, you can't help but let the moans escape you.

gradually, he fastens his pace until he catches a rhythm that suits you both, skin slapping the only sound in the room besides your panting and moans.

he masters the moves pretty quickly, his moves rolling more so than hammering, just like how you like it.

his tip keeps on hitting your sweet spot over and over again, the tension in your tummy starting to slowly build again because of it after a few minutes of him going at it.

joshua notices how you start to squeeze more tightly around his cock, how you are trying to milk him dry-and succeeding, by the looks of it.

naturally, he starts going faster, until he's just chasing his high. his hips slam against your asscheeks, leaving the skin red and tender to each following contact of his hips.

the entire time he's fucking you, joshua is either attempting to kiss you, tongue invading your mouth and all, or he's just keeping them there, touching your own as he's moaning and groaning.

his sounds make you go insane, from him moaning while saying "pussy so good" to groaning out a "god, fuck" every now and then.

it all messes with your head.

it all makes you want him to cum. now.

you hug his shoulders and brace your heels against his back, trying everything to keep him as close as possible. your mouth end up right by his ear, moaning one thing over and over again.

"cum for me."

joshua chases both your and his high, holding back from giving you what you want until you cum first.

your pleasure first, then his.

he wants you to milk him dry as he's cumming, not a second earlier or later.

he keeps on fucking you, repeatedly hitting your spot until you scream "i'm cumming!" right into his ear. you squeeze around him so tightly that it triggers his own orgasm, spilling inside of you, coating your walls white in his cum.

he groans as he finishes inside of you, riding out both your orgasms, his hands clawing at your thighs, pulling you closer until his balls are right against your ass.

once he feels that he's overstimulating both himself and you, he stops, but he makes no move to pull out, letting himself fall on top of you instead.

for a minute or so, you two just breathe as you hold each other, his face buried in your neck with his eyes closed, blissfully basking in the glory of the post-orgasm.

once you regain your breath, you post a question that only a fool would say no to.

"wanna go again?"

[kisssukuna33]

Can i request a sukunaxreader fic about the reader flinching during an argument with sukuna. Let’s make it a lil angsty but super comforting and reassuring.

"I told you it was not like that!" You said as you stormed into the house nearly slamming the door to Sukuna who was just behind you.

Sukuna let out a huff as he closed the door and followed behind you. "Oh yeah? Tell me what the fuck it was then?" he growled as he searched an answer through your face.

"He was being friendly Sukuna! Friendly!" You said clearly feeling upset about how Sukuna just made a scene at the the restaurant by threatening a random guy.

"Friendly yeah?" He said as he let out a chuckle to hide his darken expression, "Being Friendly while eye fucking you from the top to bottom? You call that being buddy- buddy princess?"

"He apologized for asking my number after you told him to knock it off, He probably didn't know Sukuna" you said taking off your shoes as you ignore Sukuna who's still lingering behind you.

"Bullshit! Who the fuck approaches a girl to hit on her when there's a man sitting right next to her?"

"Sukuna he's a highschool friend! We used to joke around all the time. Don't take it to heart-"

"So I'm supposed to tuck my tail in and watch some fucker flirt with my girl?" Sukuna said grabbing by your shoulders turning you around. You can see it in his eyes, Oh he's pissed

"That's not what I said! You could have handle it way better than threatening to beat him up in front of a whole restaurant!! You said trying to break free from his grip and eventually Sukuna let you go.

"Oh yeah guess I'm the bad guy for wanting to fucking protect my girlfriend, yeah?" A bitter scoff escaped from Sukuna as he said that. "Are you embarrassed of me? Cuz I'm not the perfect guy from your fairytales?"

"You're not listening to me!!"

"AND YOU ARE BEING FUCKING ANNOYING!!"

His sudden change of the tone sent a shock wave through your body, unintentionally making you flinch as you took a step back from him.

It took only few seconds for Sukuna to realize what he did, seeing your watery eyes was more than enough for Sukuna to snap out of that damn mood in an instant.

"shit. I'm so sorry princess-"

"Go away!" You said wiping your tears trying to hide your face from Sukuna's gaze.

Suddenly you feel a big pair of strong arms wrapping around your waist. The moment you try to tell him off you feel Sukuna's face nuzzle into the crook of your neck.

"I would never hurt you doll, you know that right? You're my fucking life" The regret in his voice already making your anger soothe away, little by little.

" it still surprised me" you said finally controlling your sobs.

"Fuck I know, I'm so sorry princess" he said as pressed a soft kiss to your cheek, too soft like it will break you if he kissed you too hard.

Next thing you know is Sukuna picking you up with one of his arms as he sat you down on the bed. Taking your clothes off as he changed you into comfortable clothes while also changing into something casual himself.

He picked you up again as he carried you into to the middle of the bed to settle you down, so slow. Like if he wasn't careful enough you will break like a rain drop.

Next thing you feel is his arms wrapping up around you as he pull you closer into his embrace, you hesitated at first but eventually melted into the cuddles.

"Asshole" you murmured into his chest.

"I know, I'm the worst" he said rubbing your back softly.

"Idiot! Fool! Stupid! Moron!"

"mhm yes I am" he cooed as he continued to leave warm kisses all over your face.

"Are you done princess? Finally let that anger out? If u didn't you can punch me-"

"no it's fine now" you said cutting off his sentence as you finally hugged him back, making Sukuna let out a big sigh in relief.

"If I ever do that again you have the right to slap the shit out of me"

You giggled into his chest. Teasingly hitting his chest. "No make sure there won't be a second time dummy"

"Promise princess" he said kissing your temple and then finally leaning down to capture your lips.

That day Sukuna became a man of his words.

[adhdduckie]

candy grams. g.w. x reader

my masterlist

music choice; dandelions by ruth b

word count: 2.7 k

pt 2 soon

synopsis;

you've been in love with george for almost as long as you've known him.

that makes 6 years. and for the last 5, you've been in love with him.

valentines' day is around the corner. and you think it's a great idea to send him a candy gram anonymously. a/n - no valentines this year so i thought id finally lock in and give some of yall a treat! hope u enjoy + pls interact!

George Weasley is one of your favourite people ever. He's sweet, funny and kind when he wants to be. So, many girls you know have a crush on him. So do you. It's kind of a pain, most of the time. He's your best friend, you're so integrated into his family, the burrow is your second home. Molly loves you, and so does the rest of the family.

George and Fred are both large parts of your daily life. You're one of the only people who are able to tell them apart. They look exactly the same, but you're able to tell a difference. You're not even entirely sure how you know, but you just know.

Classes with the two are entertaining, you sitting between the two on a bench, stifled giggles can be heard throughout the classroom, and are a constant in every class you have with the twins. You're closest with George, having become friends in first year when you were placed next to him in potions after snape had enough of the twins sitting together.

Although it wasn't till second year before you realised you cared about george beyond a friend should. A constant figure in your mind, and a constant figure in your life, he invaded every moment of your life.

it wasn't like he did it on purpose. he was just everywhere you turned. In the hallways, laughing with fred while they made fun of Ron, next to you in classes, sitting across from you in the great hall at feeding times, and during the holidays when he'd send you constant letters on updates of things he and his brother made in their room. You were invited over a lot, but obviously you had to spend some time with your family before you went over to the burrow.

You had lived with these feelings for years, not many knew. Fred didn't, so George didn't. Hermione seemed to be the only one that knew, and it was only because of her intelligence was she able to figure out. 5th year was honestly the worst. Your O.W.Ls were coming around, and you had the stupid pink toad umbridge for a teacher. she was a pain in the ass, constantly punishing students for practically no reason.

Because McGonagall understood how everyone was in low spirits, she introduced the muggle idea of candy grams. There were some students who found them stupid since they derived from muggles, but you wanted to try it. So, on the fourteenth of february, you bought one. Sent it to George. left it anonymous, because you just wanted him to know someone out there liked him.

you regretted sending that damn candy gram not even 20 minutes later, the moment he came bounding into the common room with a pesky grin on his face, yelling out your name.

"what?" you said as you looked up from your book.

he shoved the paper under your nose, effectively poking you in the eyes with the corner of the paper. "look! someone sent me a candy gram." he grinned at you.

"congrats?" you say, trying to keep your cool, hoping that he couldn't tell that you were the one that wrote it. You didn't want to lose his friendship. It really meant too much to you, and you'd probably rather die than lose him.

"do you not get the significance of this moment?" he clutched his chest dramatically.

"i refuse to believe someone actually has a crush on you. You're such a menace to society." you tell him, rolling your eyes, trying to keep yourself together and not end up screaming and running away.

There's a knowing glint in his eyes that you don't seem to notice, but he doesn't respond or comment on anything. He shoves the note under your nose again, forcing you to read it.

"Dearest George,

I hope this note finds you well. I couldn't keep these feelings hidden any longer, but I must remain anonymous for now. Over the years, I've cherished our friendship more than words can express. But it's evolved into something deeper, something I can't deny.

You've become the light of my life, and I can't help but feel a love that goes beyond friendship. If one day, you discover who I am and feel the same way, I'll be waiting, ready to take a chance for us.

Until then, I remain in secrecy.

sincerely and with love,

a secret admirer"

he reads out by heart, as if he's memorised the entire thing already. you gape at him, not knowing what you're actually supposed to say right now. nothing has prepared you for this moment.

"well?" he demands, plopping his weight down on the cushion next to you.

"well what?" you ask him, slightly flushed from having a love note you've written read out to you by the person you like.

"what do you think? who do you think it is?" he questions you, bombarding you with several questions when you're still trying to process what possessed you to send him the candy gram in the first place.

"man, i don't know." you tell him, shrugging, turning back to your book, trying to move the topic on.

"oh come on y/n! help me out here! I'm your best friend..." he whines, dropping his head in your lap. It's a common habit of his, invading your personal space, but let's be honest, you don't mind in the slightest.

"what do you want me to do?" you sigh. He always has a way of making you crumble. He beams instantly, Sitting upright again, almost head butting you and giving you a lovely little concussion.

"help me find out who it is!" he responds with a cheeky grin.

"why, george? are you going to make fun of them or something?" you sigh tiredly, really wanting him to give up on this, but you know how he is. once he starts, it's hard to get him to stop.

"because, what if she's hot?" he wiggles his eyebrows at you, and you can't help but crack a smile at his simplicity.

"just because she might be hot? What if she's super ugly? What will you do then?" You tease him, but you do want to know what he's going to do when he finds out it was you, and crushes his hopes of it being Angelina Johnson.

"I know she's pretty." he responds in retaliation.

"how do you know?" you challenge, raising your eyebrow at him as you question your own sanity for liking someone like him.

"It's a gut feeling." he shrugs his shoulders, before standing up from the couch, offering you his hand to pull you up. you set your book down with a sad sigh, accepting his hand as he pulls you up. His hand envelops yours easily, as if they fit together, and his hands are a nice kind of warm, warm enough to make you feel happy, but not warm enough to make you clammy and sweaty. the perfect balance.

he's a lot stronger than you give him credit for, and he pulls you up easily, till you're standing almost chest to chest, well more like head to chest, since he's so much taller than you. If you looked up at him, you would be close enough to kiss. His smell envelopes you, a rich smell of freshly upturned grass and the smell of smoke and a Christmas fire.

you clear your throat abruptly, and the pair of you spring apart. you're avoiding eye contact with george, but if you looked at him you would see how the tips of his ears are red enough to match the colour of his hair.

You get a strange look from the other people in the common room, and fred, who's been close enough to hear the entire conversation, grins at what he's just realised.

He lets out a light chuckle, and you turn to look at him, raising your eyebrow. He shrugs and grins. George's deliberately avoiding eye contact, looking everywhere but you. Fred laughs louder, to the point where he needs to lean on the edge of a couch to prevent himself from falling over.

George pauses, looks at you, before he grins. "You can start helping me tomorrow." He says, before bouncing away, out of the portrait hole. Fred laughs even louder. You turn to him again, before frowning.

"what?" you ask him. It sets him off again, he only stops laughing when he starts coughing.

Fred holds up his finger, and you wait till he regains his composure. He takes another look at you before it sets him off again. You groan.

"I think i know who sent my dear brother the candy gram." He says, wiping a tear away from his eye with his index.

"oh yeah? who?" you ask. Your heart's thumping in your ears, but you're trying your best to seem calm and collected.

a smile stretches across his face, and he looks like he's planning something. "oh, my dear y/n. I do indeed. It seems the girl and i are quite close." he purrs, pulling you close into a hug. You sigh, wrapping your arms around fred.

"please don't tell him." you whisper, hiding your face into his chest. he smiles. He's viewed you as a little sister since the beginning, and he's glad you feel the same way for his brother as his brother does for you.

"i wouldn't dream of it. Unless.....?" he starts, but drifts off, not finishing the sentence.

"fred!" you whine, irritated.

"okay, okay." he laughs, pulling back from the hug, resting his hands on your shoulder, staring deep into your eyes. suddenly he goes serious, the smile dropping off his face quick.

"but seriously. If you never tell him, i'll do it eventually. You can't stay secret admirer forever, and i'm most likely going to die of frustration just watching you two." He finishes. Stepping back, plopping down onto the couch

"i shouldn't have done it fred! i don't know what i was thinking." you groan, hiding your face in his shoulder, plopping down next to him.

"well i think it was a good idea." fred says, throwing an arm carelessly across your shoulder. you groan in response, closing your eyes with a sigh.

the next couple of days are strange, to say the least. George actively seeks you out more than usual, the only topic he speaks of is his secret admirer. It's quite strange, having the object of your affections constantly speak of a romantic gesture you made toward them without them knowing. It's nice, but quite scary, to say the least.

there's the constant fear of being discovered, and when discovered, you're afraid that george is going to be disappointed that you were the one that sent it to him and not Angelina Johnson.

but whatever, you need to act as inconspicuous as possible, right? fred certainly isn't helping, constantly giggling to himself whenever the topic is brought up, while george flashes him a questioning side eye.

one day after potions lesson during lunch, you and george remain behind in the classrooms, cleaning up as a form of punishment from professor snape.

you're kneeling on the floor, cleaning up a spill from some third years. without magic. if it wasn't obvious that snape hated you beforehand, it is now.

you don't even remember what exactly it was that you did, but here you are anyway. george, who somehow got the easier task, is just sitting on a chair as he scrubs at some of the tables in the room.

"this is all your fault, george." you blame, rubbing at the persistent stain on the floor.

"how? you were the one giggling too loudly." george throws back at you. very maturely, you throw the rag you're using at his face. he blocks it, instead of hitting his face, it hits his arm with a wet 'thwump'.

'hey!" he complains at you, throwing it back at you. you duck out of the way, and it hits the wall behind you with another wet sound.

you turn to stare at where it went, and you look back at him, before you burst out into giggles together.

suddenly, you hear the sounds of footsteps, and knowing snape, you stumble to get the rag and go back the stain, rubbing at it with the best of your ability.

you hear the sound of the door groaning on its hinges as it slams open, revealing a disgruntled and angry prof snape.

“i thought. i heard laughter.” he drawls in his cold and distatched tone, the corner of his mouth turning down in distaste.

“no, professor. we wouldn’t dare. Perhaps it was Peeves running through.” you answer, in your best imitation of a innocent student, and professor turns his eyes onto you, glaring at you with distaste.

“i’d hope not. if i hear another peep out of you both, it’s 50 points from gryffindor. each.” he teels you, before swishing around in his ridiculous cape and exiting through the door.

you both turn to each other slowly, before doubling over in silent laughter, clutching your stomach insanely.

once you’ve both managed to contain yourselves, you get back to the work you’re supposed to doing, letting the silence pass between you comfortably.

you hear a little sigh leave george’s mouth, and you turn to look at him, noticing that he’s already looking at you.

“what?” you ask him, raising your brow at him.

he flushes a red that makes his freckles stand out, and you wish so desperately to count them all at some point.

you will manage to do that at some point if you’re lucky..you’ll probably have to disguise it as some kind of friendly activity…

he avoids your eye contact and he sighs, before looking back up at you for a second, before he asks, “are you sure you don’t know who wrote the candy gram?”

your heart stutters in your chest, a little part of you feeling an intense need to run as fast and as far as possible.

“yeah. sorry, george. I promise I asked around.” you so blatantly lie, and he just kind of stares at you, and he doesn’t look impressed at all. you swear his left eye twitches a little.

after a beat of you avoiding as much eye contact with him as possible, by looking somewhere else, anywhere else from him, because he honestly scares you a little and honestly any thing to do with your emotions so obviously displayed is quite terrifying.

another moment passes by you, and you try to turn your attention back to the stain you’re scrubbing at. you begin to stand up, about to go get some more soap to make sure the stain really does get out, when you hear george call your name.

‘….you do realise I can recognise your handwriting, right? we’ve been friends for ages.” he tells you, and your head whips to him so fast, you get whiplash.

“what?” you respond, ever the poet.

“your handwriting. I know you sent me the candy gram.” he mutters, standing up to match you, stalking forwards with his eyes set on you. “why are you lying?” he asks you, stopping right in front of you.

you can’t respond. you’re frozen, mouth wide open as you gape at him. he’s very close to you now, and you feel your heart thumping in your chest. “i don’t know what you’re talking about.” you lie, walking sideways as he follows you, while you try to face the door to escape.

“i know, for sure, that it was you who sent it to me.” He asserts again, following you, not to closely as to make you uncomfortable, as he is ever the kindest soul you will ever know.

you know that you are not ready to have this conversation right now, so you feign that someone is calling your name, and make a run for it. “oh. is that someone calling me? oh yes it is. Yes I’m coming!”

george tries to stop you, by putting an arm out to block you, but you duck under, sprinting out the door as quick as you can.

you’re swearing as you run, and you hear him call out your name, once, twice and then silence.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

a/n -> this has been in my drafts for much more than a year so im glad i finally got it out... pt 2 soon!!!

pls pls pls pls interact and comment i love reading comments

[avengerrs]

and i think the best thing about brave new world is sam’s authenticity. he’s always been such a down to earth character and someone who strives to be a genuinely good person, but that is shown so heavily throughout this entire film. he wants to do his best, not for him, but in order to give hope to everyone else. he sees the good in people even when he probably shouldn’t. he cares about the ones that are close to him. he makes stupid jokes and is sarcastic around literally everyone because he just wants to build connections and make others comfortable. sam is always having these internal struggles of not living up to steve’s legacy and regretting not taking the serum for himself, but that’s why he’s the perfect person for this job. he’s literally just some guy. he’s just a person, like every other person, and he fights for the good that he sees in others. he gives his all in order to build hope for all. steve knew that. bucky knows that. and the world should see that. sam wilson will always be my cap <33

[nmhdreamscape]

stumbling hearts ✧ n.jm (valentine's gift series)

pairing | friend!jaemin x fem!reader

content | friends to lovers, fluff, jealousy, suggestive

word count | 647

request | jaemin + 13

notes | struggled a little with this one, hope it's okay!

you stumbled into your apartment with a laugh, stumbling over your heels as you entered your hallway. the alcohol had long worn, and you were now left with a terrible the pain in your feet, instant relief coming as you shucked them off. jaemin stepped into your apartment after you, shutting the door behind you. he had demanded he walk you home after your night out, wanting to make sure you got home safe in your inebriated state.

jaemin had opted to stay sober, he wasn’t really feeling it. that feeling only got worse as the night progressed, being subjected to watching you go off with every guy who had approached you. wishing it was him who had the courage to come up and ask you for a dance. wishing that he could get the chance to hold you like that. it all left a sour taste in his mouth that he knew would only be made worse with alcohol.

you had picked up on jaemin’s mood on the walk home, not greeting you with the same warmth and kindness he usually did. he was ignoring you, something that was very out of character for him. that resulted in most of the journey being spent in silence, that continuing as you entered your apartment. when you looked over at him, you saw how his gaze rested on you. at this point you were done, sick of his attitude. you needed to know why he was acting this way.

“you’ve been acting weird all night, are you okay?” you asked with your eyebrow raised. he didn’t even bother to respond, simply moving to put your shoes on the shoe rack next to the door. you let out a scoff, that catching his attention. he finally turned to face you, but still no response. you stormed over to him.

“you can’t just keep ignoring me!” you yelled, staring straight into his eyes. jaemin’s eyes fell to your lips before looking up into your eyes again. he was about to do something he would probably regret in the morning, but at least he could say he tried. gripping you by the waist, he pulled you into a kiss, lips pressing harshly against yours as he took you all in. 

you simply stood there in shock. had you hit your head on the way home? there was no way this was real? months of subtle touches, flirtatious comments and shameless pining had done little to get his attention. you had all but given up on the prospect of him being interested in you. and yet here you were. by the time your brain had caught up to your body, jaemin was already pulling away, much to your disappointment.

“watching you with all those other guys tonight, it was torture. it made me realise i just need to let it all out and tell you. i just... i want you, all of you. and that might be selfish, but i don’t care.” jaemin whispered, staring into your eyes as he cupped your cheek. your face lit up with a bright smile at this, hand coming to rest on top of his.

“you have me.” you reassured, squeezing his hand. “plus, they meant nothing. the guy i like wouldn’t dance with me, so somebody had to” you joked, rolling your eyes. jaemin looked down at you with his signature bright smile, still somewhat in disbelief at how things were turning out. 

“well, let me make it up to you then.” jaemin smirked, lifting you up off of the ground and into his arms. you let out a squeal, legs instinctively coming to wrap around his waist. he once again joined your lips in a kiss, whisking you off to your bedroom. he had thought of many different ways to make it up to you, and he couldn’t wait to show you them all. 

valentine's gift masterlist

[burningembers91]

Fatherly Disdain - Nam-Gyu x Fem!Reader

Follow up piece to:

Outside Looking In In the Bleak Midwinter Without You Looking Up

Synopsis: Desperate to reconnect with his family, Nam-Gyu agrees to attend dinner with his estranged father, who drops a bombshell on you, threatening everything you've worked so hard for

It was the strong, bold smell of the coffee that awoke you. The rich, dark aroma floated sensually from the cup to your nose, entwining itself around your senses and pulling you from your deep sleep. Nam-Gyu had placed the large cup on your bedside table, complete with his usual sticky note he left each morning, reminding you how much he loved you.

He left so early for work these days, up before the sun rose to go for a run through the neighbourhood, before heading to the office. He was a completely different man these days, so far removed from the one you’d met outside of your old club. These days, Nam-Gyu valued exercise and early mornings, he cooked for you, cleaned the apartment, and did all the grocery shopping. With him around, you never had to lift a finger. You felt guilty sometimes, feeling that you weren’t doing enough around the house, but Nam-Gyu assured you that he liked taking care of you.

He’d always wanted someone like you, someone that he was excited to wake up next to, someone he could spend every day with. He no longer desired the fickle popularity that came with club promoting, finding peace in the cozy existence he shared with you. He relished slow, lazy mornings on your days off, trips to the supermarket and local coffee shop. He would take a night with you on the sofa, with a movie and takeout over a night out drinking with people who couldn’t even be bothered to learn his name. Nam-Gyu would cringe when he thought about the person he used to be, so desperate for the validation of strangers. Now all he needed was you, his friends, and his family.

His job as a Junior Finance Assistant was going well, the people in his small office feeling more like family than colleagues. For the first time, he had a real group of friends, ones that he ate lunch with, went out for drinks and dinner with; he knew these people had his back. His relationships with his brothers had improved, and you were regular visitors to their homes for dinner a few times a month. Nam-Gyu had even reconnected with his mother, filling her in on the past few months and telling her all about the woman who had changed her son so drastically. Everyone was so proud of Nam-Gyu, everyone except his father.

No matter how many times his family sang his praises, Nam-Gyu’s dad wasn’t interested in seeing for himself how much his son had changed. As far he was concerned, Nam-Gyu had been given enough chances to change, and he hadn’t bothered to do so until it was too late.

“He’ll come around,” you told him one day, but you didn’t know his father. Growing up, his home had been a dictatorship, and if you didn’t follow the rules, you were cast out. As much as it hurt Nam-Gyu that he no longer had a relationship with his dad, he chose to focus on the relationships he did have.

He met his mum for coffee once a week during his lunch break, catching her up on his life. ��I’d like for you to come for dinner,” she said to him to one day, “It’s been so long since you’ve been home.” “Mum,” Nam-Gyu sighed, tired of having the same conversation again and again. “You know dad doesn’t want me there. He said so himself.” “But I want you there,” she smiled, “you’re my son, and I never should have let you leave.” Nam-Gyu understood his mother’s regret over making him leave, but if he hadn’t left, he probably wouldn’t be with you. He would probably still be standing out in the cold, loving you from afar. “Please,” his mum begged, “this Thursday, come for dinner. You don’t have to stay long, but I miss you.”

You could tell he was nervous about seeing his father again, could see how jittery he was the night before. He’d left extra early this morning, choosing a longer running route to try and dispel some of the anxiety that coursed through his veins. After you finished your coffee, you made sure to tidy the apartment, giving Nam-Gyu one less thing to worry about when he got home.

“It’s going to be ok,” you soothed as you watched him retie his tie for the third time. “It’s just dinner.” You took the silky fabric from his shaking hands, assembling a basic knot for him. You’d never seen Nam-Gyu so dressed up before, not even for work. “Does this shirt look ok with these pants?” He asked, angrily stripping them off. Everything needed to be perfect, and he looked anything but. “Nam-Gyu,” you soothed, “they look really good. Put the pants back on, take a breath and let’s get going, or we’ll miss our bus.”

You waited patiently for him to redress, before pulling him in for one last kiss. You could feel him shaking against you, could see the sweat beading on his brow. “If you feel uncomfortable, we’ll leave,” you said, your stomach twisting into uncomfortable knots as you saw how anxious he was. Nam-Gyu simply nodded, taking a deep intake of breath as he slicked back his hair. He so badly wanted tonight to go well, but he knew his father, and he knew that this dinner would not be an easy one.

You arrived at Nam-Gyu’s parents house at 7pm on the dot. His father detested lateness, something that his son had frequently been during his time living under his roof. He clutched the bouquet of flowers that you’d picked out for his mother, his palms sweaty against the cellophane wrapping. You gave his shoulder a reassuring squeeze, pressing a quick kiss to his cheek before the front door swung open.

Nam-Gyu’s father stood before you, his face stony. “On time for once I see,” he sneered, “first time for everything I suppose.” He stepped aside to let you in, eyeing his son with disdain. His shirt was ill-fitting, his tie too much for a casual dinner and his pants were entirely unsuitable. As for you, his father had no words. “It’s nice to meet you,” you smiled, bowing low, ensuring you treated the man with the utmost respect. You could see why Nam-Gyu had been so nervous about coming tonight; his dad had put the fear of God into you.

You didn’t get a response to your greeting, his father leaving the two of you standing in the entryway. You both looked at each other, Nam-Gyu shrugging sadly. As you made your way through, the most incredible smells hit you. There was enough food to feed an entire army, and Nam-Gyu’s mother had evidently been cooking for most of the day. she greeted you with love and warmth, ushering you to the table. You tried hard to make conversation, but Nam-Gyu father wasn’t interested. He answered every question with silence, instead choosing to stare directly at the wall behind you. You couldn’t believe this was how Nam-Gyu spent his childhood, living in the shadow of such a cruel man.

What his father lacked in social graces, his mum more than made up for. She was so excited to hear about your life and your jobs, what you did for fun and who your friends were. You almost forgot his father was sat opposite you as you laughed and joked with Nam-Gyu and his mum. You could see how much love she had for her son, and how much love he had for her in return.

It wasn’t until his father loudly cleared his throat, that you remembered he was still there. Reaching across the table, he handed Nam-Gyu an envelope. “Je-Mun,” his mum whispered, “don’t do this.” You noticed she didn’t make eye contact when she spoke to her husband, and you saw the way the smile quickly faded from your boyfriend’s face.

“What is this?” he asked, looking back and forth between his parents. “My invoice,” his father simply said. Opening the envelope, Nam-Gyu found an itemised invoice for overdue rent, bills, money loaned and food eaten from 2012 – 2024. “What is this?” he asked again, his face pale.

“It’s what you owe me,” his father stated, “that is what your upkeep cost for the twelve years you were leeching off me. Now that you have a job, you can finally pay me back.” The table was stunned into silence, no one quite knowing what to say. The invoice was meticulously detailed, down to the brand of soap Nam-Gyu had used. Had his father really been keeping this kind of record? “This isn’t fair,” you snapped, “you can’t do that.” “I think you’ll find I can do what I like,” Je-Mun grunted back, barely acknowledging you as he spoke. “I will be happy to accept monthly instalments, but I do expect the amount to be paid back in full.” You noticed with sickening disgust that your dinner tonight had also been added to the bill.

Nam-Gyu couldn’t take this, the utter humiliation was beyond suffocating. You made your excuses and left shortly after; his father’s invoice clutched tightly in his hand. you didn’t speak on the way home, his face ghostly white as he tried to figure out how he would pay back such an extortionate sum. He was sure his father had never charged his brothers for their medical degree, so why was he so different?

“You can’t seriously be thinking about paying that back,” you cried when you finally made it back home. “That’s insanity! Who does that kind of thing?” “I’m going to have to,” he whispered, slumping down on the sofa. Just this morning, he’d been so happy and now his world was once again crumbling away. His father would not accept non-payment, but Nam-Gyu had no idea how he’d pay him back. “Can you talk to your brothers?” you asked, “can they make him see sense?” “I really don’t know,” he muttered, “I just… I need some air.”

Nam-Gyu threw on his running gear, heading out of the door and into the night. He ran for miles, his mind whirring as he weighed up his options. He’d been putting money aside each month for a bigger place for the both of you, hoping you’d one day be able to move somewhere with enough space to start a family. Now, he wasn’t even sure how he’d afford to pay the bills on your current place. He’d always known his father was a bastard, but he didn’t think he was that cruel. It was a ploy to humiliate him, to make Nam-Gyu feel worthless.

By the time he arrived back at the apartment, Nam-Gyu had made up his mind. He would no longer allow his father to intimidate him, to make him feel small. He wouldn’t allow himself to be bullied by the man who was supposed to love him. If his father was so desperate for his money, he would have to come and take it by force.  

[kindaasrikal]

Canonically speaking Kai very willingly cares for Lloyd. And he also isn’t the only one who does so. I know with fan content and with the rgb scenes in dragons rising it seems as if its JUST rgb who are sibling like but thats just not the case. The writers mainly do that because of how popular rgb is, but canonically all of them view each other as siblings (except nya and jay for obvious reasons) and they all have collectively taken care of Lloyd when he was younger as well as when he got older.

And Lloyd, whilst not in the same ‘older sibling’ way the others have, has also cared for them equally so.

I don’t think Kai regrets having to take care of Nya in anyway, and it was of the responsibility and the need to survive that traumatised him rather than the fact that he had to do it in general if you get what i mean. Not to mention the fact that Kai has taken on the burden of protecting people like a second skin for everyone, not just Lloyd.

They tend to be painted as siblings, but that doesn’t remove the fact that they’re also friends, as well as family when they legit didn’t have any other. I’d actually even say that having Nya around when he was younger actually saved Kai from becoming a huge ass. I’ve kinda talked about it before but i believe that if Kai didn’t have Nya around his character would’ve been widely different and more negative. To put it simply that mf LIKES taking care of people. They’re both also very capable people, who are equal in strengths, so i don’t think Lloyd has ever actually been a ‘burden’ for a long time now.

I'm so conflicted bout rg/rbg siblings because on one hand I think the fanart is nice and kai and lloyds dynamic is one of my favorites in the show but on the other hand I don't like what it does for kai's character.

Like kai has been through a lot even from a young age having to raise nya when he was a kid and be her protector. So him feeling obligated to take care of lloyd (for misako) just feels like it's dragging kai back to that old turama.

Where he's stuck taking care of a teen when he himself is a teen and needs to be his protector when that's the thing that caused him to loose his childhood doing it with nya.

Kai grew up fast and so did lloyd in different ways. As much as I want to say that kai giving lloyd a chance to be a kid when he couldn't be one by taking care of him is just sad in my opinion and frustrating

Cause lloyd already lost that childhood with tommows tea! There isn't a childhood to protect if it's already been ruined. Then theirs him trying to protect lloyd but that doesn't touch me cause lloyds the super powerful chosen one, he doesn't need protection and if he does it shouldn't all fall on kai.

Like I get kai protecting lloyd cause he's important and him thinking he should protect the green ninja but it's when they start saying that it's something more personal that I'm backing out of.

Tldr: lloyd feels like a burden kai has to carry that just forces him to relive his bad childhood and put himself in harms way for no reason just in the sake of protecting the savior of ninjago of all people. Like everyone is putting lloyd on kai's shoulders and it makes me feel bad to see art of him big brothering lloyd cause of it.

[galaxymagitech]

Guide to Jaybin: The Origin Story

Pre-Crisis — Batman #357 to Detective Comics #526

Featuring Pre-Crisis weirdness, adorable Jason, and analysis of Bruce and Dick's arguments.

I am reading all of Robin!Jason Todd's comics in order, starting with his pre-crisis origin. Here are thoughts, mostly characterization and relationship focused, on this set of comics. (In the future, I might break stuff like this into multiple posts, because this ended up being pretty long).

Not-So-Serious Summary: Killer Croc, a new mobster in town, teams up with a disgruntled spy with a speech impediment (Squid), who he eventually kills. Croc tries to take over Gotham's crime scene and kill the Batman. Joker takes issue with this, and tries to play Croc and the other Gotham Rogues against each other. A family of circus acrobats, the Todds, get in the middle and end up fed to crocodiles. Meanwhile, Jason Todd is taken to Wayne Manor for his safety, where he finds the Batcave and stows away to help. Batman, Robin, and a vengeful Jason defeat Killer Croc.

Most Unhinged/Funny Moments

Batman breaks into a shooting range, beats people up, kidnaps a man, ties him up in the Batcave, and tells him that no one knows he's there and he has no rights. Meanwhile, Robin's sitting there, grinning and talking ominously.

I'm sorry, but this sounds very gay.

Characterization

Bruce — Refers to criminals as “creeps,” “thugs,” and “scum." Throws himself into danger and displays cartoonish righteousness. All fairly typical for 1980s Batman, unfortunately, and he still seems pretty human and warm in this arc. Although he believes that Squid maybe "deserved to die," because he's "scum," he doesn't allow that in Gotham. Oh, and he makes puns, complete with a "get it? I think he got it."

Dick — He's kind and compassionate, and prone to guilt. He's also very involved in Gotham's social sphere, and is able to competently host a reception.

Jason — Fairly generic. He's friendly and polite, but is way too willing to pick up an old Robin costume to help. When his parents die, he's vengeful and has to be restrained, but he quickly devolves into shaking and crying.

Relationships

Bruce & Dick

Bruce is naturally paranoid and wants Dick to be more cautious as well, which is a point of contention between them.

He knows he and Dick are drifting apart and is afraid of this.

For most of the arc, they're warm and friendly with each other.

However, near the end of the arc, Bruce randomly blows up at Dick and starts yelling at him, before pushing Alfred’s tray to the ground. Real mature, Bruce. Dick angrily says Bruce is “getting to be a stranger” to Alfred.

To Bruce's credit, he immediately regrets his actions.

I am tempted to make an analysis about this panel, but this read is supposed to be about Jason. So just briefly...

Bruce is partially to blame for the Todds' deaths.

Yelling "to hell with you!" is pretty nasty but okay.

Alfred, telling Dick "I'm sure he didn't mean it, Master Dick" is really unnecessary.

Dick was really not doing anything wrong, from his perspective Bruce just blew up unpredictably out of nowhere.

Bruce is really resentful about Gotham's citizens.

Bruce uses "Richard" instead of "Dick" to display his anger.

Mitigating Circumstances: The dramatic comics poses probably make the argument seem worse than it is. Also, Bruce is having a crisis right now over how Killer Croc saved his life and he subconsciously let Croc go in return.

Dick & Jason

Dick becomes friendly with Jason's parents and Jason, partially because Trina Todd reminds him of his mother.

Gordon blames Dick for the Todds' deaths because he had them investigate (despite him stating that them following Croc wasn't ever the plan, and him trying to convince Bruce to stop using the Todds for the plan and getting yelled at in response).

Dick feels responsible for the Todds' deaths and has grown to care about Jason, so he wants to adopt Jason. Bruce offers to adopt Jason instead, because "if it's anyone's fault it's mine".

Dick is happy about this and voluntarily tells Alfred to put Jason in his old room.

Notes/Trivia

Jason-Related

Jason comes from the Flying Todds at the Sloan Circus, (run by a guy named—you guessed it—Sloan) and Dick is friends with one of their clowns, Waldo.

His parents are Joseph and Trina Todd. Their uniforms are red or pink, depending on the panel.

The Todds are the finest trapeze troupe in America or Europe, according to Dick.

Upon meeting Robin…Jason immediately asks about Wonder Girl. Dick’s response? “You’ve got taste.”

Other

Commissioner Gordon is 60 and has a high blood pressure

Waldo calls Dick “Dickie Boy,” so that’s a known nickname for Dick

Croc is displaying fairly reasonable planning skills? He’s certainly not a brainless brute in this.

Bruce and Dick wear their costumes upstairs in the Manor. Alfred brings them refreshments without questioning their costumes, so this is a normal occurrence.

Killer Croc is fixated on the sanctity of his home. When Batman breaks into, he decides it’s “ruined” and has to start over.

Talia says Bruce is “the one man [she’ll] never go against—never!”

Alfred does indeed give comforting hot cocoa.

Characters sometimes call the Joker "Harlequin."

[deadpan-writing]

Coffee: A Thangyu Oneshot

——————

Pairing: Thanos x Nam-gyu

Warnings: None!

Summary: Nam-gyu is a barista; Thanos is a regular customer. Flirting induces. Normal coffee shop AU.

Word Count: 611

——————

The aroma of freshly brewed coffee filled the air strongly as Nam-gyu wiped down the counter of the small cafe, which was tucked away in a quiet corner of Seoul. It wasn't the busiest coffee shop, which is what drew him to working here- there were just enough customers that kept them in business, which kept him a job and kept boredom out of the picture, but it was never truly overwhelming. 

��  The door chimed while his back was turned, so he looked up at the clock. It was a few minutes after 11 am, so he knew who it was.

   Thanos showed up here nearly every day, like clockwork, maybe missing a Friday or two every now and then. The purple-haired man always ordered an espresso, no sugar or milk. He was a regular, although he and Nam-gyu had never had any extensive conversations. However, his mere presence was enough to unsettle a few of the other customers that were there at any given moment, usually to leach off of the free wi-fi. He was broad-shoulder with sharp, manic eyes, with a strong aura around him, causing Nam-gyu to wonder about him more and more. Who was this man? 

   "Your usual?" Nam-gyu asked, reaching for the cup before the other could respond. 

   Thanos gave a short nod. "Yeah," he said. His voice was a bit raspy, like gravel shifting under boots. It was deep and smooth, also, despite the raspiness. Nam-gyu really liked hearing this man's voice. 

   Nam-gyu took his time preparing the espresso, watching Thanos out of the corner of his eye. He looked more exhausted than usual, with dark circles under his eyes. His shoulders slumped as well. Nam-gyu rose an eyebrow. Maybe he could cheer him up?

   So, instead of immediately placing the cup in front of him, he hesitated. "Do you ever think about trying something different?"

   Thanos looked a bit surprised by the sudden question. He arched an eyebrow and crossed his arms tightly in front of his chest. "Like what?"

   Nam-gyu smirked. "I don't know. Maybe something sweet for a change?" He listed off a couple options, maintaining eye contact. "A caramel macchiato? A vanilla latte?" 

   Thanos chuckled a bit. The sound caused Nam-gyu to feel his face start burning, although it was a low heat; probably not even noticeable. He had never heard the other laugh before."I don't do sweets."

   "Figures." Nam-gyu slid the espresso across the counter to the other man with an easy grin on his lips. "Bitter suits you."

   Thanos picked up the cup, hesitating a little before he finally took a sip. He grinned back at Nam-gyu. "Then what suits you?"

   Nam-gyu leaned forward, hands made up in fists underneath his chin, elbows on the counter. "Me?" He fake thought about it for a moment. "I like to switch it up every time. It's a small thing, but it keeps life a little more interesting." 

   For a moment, Thanos just looked at the other. The sharp eyes that Nam-gyu grew more fond of every time he saw him scanned his face. He hummed quietly, intrigued. "Okay, fine," he pointed at him with his free hand. Nam-gyu noticed his fingernails were painted a variety of different colors. "Next time, you pick for me then."

   Nam-gyu smiled. "Careful," he teased, "You may regret it."

   Thanos shook his head, a small smile playing at his lips. "I doubt it."

   Just like that, the cafe felt a little warmer. Thanos walked out, waving a little to the other man. Nam-gyu excitedly turned to the menu, scanning it over and over any time he got the chance. 

   He was ready to make this good. 

[ugly-cactus]

i think canon evidence points to the fact that remus had loving parents despite probably having a complicated relationship

remus is proficient in DADA, especially in magical creatures, which was his father's specialty. that suggests that lyall spent a lot of time teaching remus 1-on-1, which usually makes for a pretty strong bond – especially for remus, who seems to love finding and sharing knowledge

extracanon/pottermore explicitly says lyall really really regretted his anti-werewolf streak. and that he loved remus plenty, but that feels like cheating to cite so i'm compiling more thoughts eventually

as @dufferpuffer says, snape "conspicuously lacks" an air of being well-cared for in his clothing and hair – signs of neglect, not just poverty; in contrast, remus is poor (at least in adulthood) but his stuff is mended, personalized, stuff that suggests love and attention to detail in his vibe (or idk "characterization")

remus assumes that the dursleys are decent guardians ("write a note to your aunt and uncle, they might worry") and when harry is telling remus about the dursleys, remus just smiles. while remus does threaten the shit out of vernon later, his initial reaction is a bit disbelieving. which makes me think his parents were significantly. (not definitive though. for example, snape also assumes that harry is "pampered" though mostly because he hates james)

although lyall did have anti-werewolf sentiment, it think remus's internalized prejudice / self-hatred is something that could have easily formed without negative familial influences. basically all of wizarding society is wary of werewolves (the curriculum teaches how to HUNT them) and lupin is very conscious of the risk he poses to other people. also he has this negative self-perception despite dumbledore, james, sirius, peter, harry, tonks telling him otherwise – these are all people he respects and loves like the sun – so his prejudice is more a result of his personality (low self-esteem, hates burdening other people) and the societal marginalization of werewolves than individual influence

[silvasreblogs]

ok it probably lacks explanation so i'll explain for the characters i think it's needed

For Diz's(OC) backstory, to say it quickly he got his AU destroyed by Nightmare's gang and later erased by Error, so that explain the hate. he also hate the Star Sanses for not intervening and stopping Nightmare's gang. He hates and fears Death (so Reaper).

Revenge used to be part of the Nightmare's gang. He's pretty neutral about the MTT, not really close or anything, not really hating them neither. However when it comes to Nightmare he absolutely hates him because of the abuse and everything. He's pretty neutral or doesn't know everyone else.

For Dream and Nightmare's relationship, it's a mix of hate/anger for the incident, still a bit of fraternal genuine care (that he would never admit), spite and regret from Nightmare's side, and genuine care, guilt about the apple incident and anger about what Nightmare's doing from Dream's side.

The Star Sanses are found family because i said so (because i need something soft and fluff to balance the angst).

The Chromatic Crew is also found family, it's really like what if you could with your friend group altogether as roommates just like a family. Cross and Epic best meme bros ever.

Error and Lust are like :

Error : You, you are the most disgusting anomaly to have ever existed and I hate you from the bottom of my heart, you are on the top of my "AUs to erase" list. Lust : BITCH WHO ARE YOU IDK YOU ??! 😐

Error and Geno are like brothers who can't bear eachother to me.

Almost everyone hates Nightmare, what a surprise.

Ccino is viewed as a source of negativity by Nightmare and he hates Nightmare because of the abuse he's put through and how he threatens his AU and his brother. And Ccino appreciates Color and admires him and how he's always ready to help others.

MTT are frenemies, don't really like eachother, they all think they are better than the two others, but there's still some kind of bond somehow.

Dance and Lust seem to be paired a lot as a ship in the UTMV fandom so now to my eyes they're buddies.

Same for Reaper and Geno.

Classic and Geno are canonically brothers in the Aftertale comic so yey, found family at its core.

Ink and Error are so frenemies to me, no romantic explanation, two aroace neurodivergent guys who likes beating the shit out of eachother.

Dream has mixed feelings about Reaper, doesn't know if he likes him or fears him - probably both.

Killer and Color are probably in a QPR and Color + Chromatic Crew are Killer's found family.

Can u make the qpp thing a little bigger for our own ocs to fit in? Just 2 or so blank spaces if that’s okay? Please

Here you go

For all the OCs, reader insert, and F/Os enthusiasts out there :)

[tree-of-growth]

FINALLY - THE LONG AWAITED “FRUIT CULT: WHERE ARE THEY NOW?” POST HAS HIT THE PRESSES!

It’s only been like. 3, 4 months since the saga ended so this is right on time fuck you! - It took a LONG time setting up interviews to record all this information ESPECIALLY since the majority of the ex fruit cult members hate me and I had to go undercover to procure them.

So, at long last - here it is!

The Tree of Growth / Fruit Cult: Where Are They Now?!

Apple is living their best life (for the most part) under the care of Allison in their shared home in Illinois. They have come out as nonbinary and aroace (and cut their hair!!) and spends plenty of time in therapy and at their local community garden, munching on apples and garlic bread. They also enjoy coloring. Oh wait- oh shit :/ the drywall got them. Oops. Nevermind. Rip.

Fig has joined an incredibly shady secret government organization and is working on an extremely top secret mission as we speak (probably has something to do with hunting down Mulberry though.) She and Cherry remain happily married and are making it work long distance.

Shrimp Man / Cherry Tomato has broken out of jail, hopped the border, and bought a beautiful cabin by the seaside where he will spend the rest of her days in (moderate) peace!

Lemon / Sadie is finishing her agriculture degree and renting a lovely house in the New York countryside with Polaris and their foster daughter Charlotte. They are in therapy and using gardening and animal husbandry to cope. She’s planning on proposing to and marrying Polaris for real once they graduate and settle down a bit more.

Lychee / Polaris is finishing up her astrophysics degree at Cornell with Sadie and Charlotte. She’s developed a particular interest in radio astronomy and has scored an especially exclusive summer internship that will almost certainly lend her to a fantastic career after graduation. They regret their time with the cult but can’t help but miss it, maybe - just a bit.

Date / Allison is currently fulfilling their prison sentence in community service as Apple’s caretaker! They reside in a small bungalow in Illinois. They’re desperately homesick and missing their family (and Percy) but is doing their best to take genuine care of Apple (but maybe not top notch. Who can blame them.) They regret everything :)

Cherry / Aura was deported to Canada and has returned to the Children of the Sun (very fun hippie commune). Technically they are jailed there but the hippies aren’t too fond of the prison industrial complex so I’m sure they’re vibing. Fig brings them “cool stuff that THEY CANNOT TELL the government about” from time to time.

Mulberry / Vrispeta is not dead!! After Area 51 they’re just trying to figure out what to do with her life. You can follow her adventures at @muppetjokernum8ereightfan ! I think she’s on the moon right now or some shit?!

Peach is in physical recovery after being turned into a quadparalegic thanks to Apple and is currently staying with his boyfriend while waiting for their prosthetics to come in. He is in a lot of debt.

Custard Apple has just woken up after a very long nap and is extremely confused.

Acai / Percy died of lead poisoning :( they’re out there rotting in the ocean, somewhere… - their ghost is likely haunting the shit out of Allison :) (Affectionate haunting, of course, nothing crazy.)

Starfruit has gone back to their normal life - but is still very dedicated to the Fruit God! He is also still posting at @squireofthegrove

Orange went home with her mom and is currently working on finishing her One Piece binge an hour at a time.

—————————

If YOU are an ex member of the fruit cult and have something you’d like to share about your life after that is not listed here, feel free to reach out and I’ll edit you in <3

But enough of those losers - What about me?! The infamous mysterious tog blog… Who am I?! Was I really just Lemon pulling a fast one on the rest of the group? Or was that only a facade ?? Am I an angel?! A crazy super fan?! The Fruit God Herself?!?

Heh. Wouldn’t you like to know.

I’ll continue posting here on occasion. Its members may have moved on but the Tree is eternal.., And I have many… many unfinished plans….

[queenkinqs]

people love to talk about invincible for it's over the top gore and violence, but i really do think the show's writing is at it's best when it's just two people have a conversation

[buddiesmutslut]

I’m genuinely so fucking sick of the “you all would have loved it if it was Eddie who made that comment” take.

First of all, Eddie wouldn’t have made comment then, bc he knows how hard it is for Buck to talk about his emotions, & is REALLY good at giving him the space to talk about them, even if he does make jokes, they’re not out of pocket (the coming out scene, anyone? Breaking the tension with a joke & still being supportive without making a joke of his feelings.)

Secondly, even if Eddie DID make that comment, I’d probably still roll my eyes, but I’d be more willing to accept it. Do you wanna know why???

Who was the person that knew the details of what Buck was talking to his therapist about during their emergency session before the Buckley’s visit? Who is the first one they show at Buck’s side when he gets stuck in the warehouse trying to pull Saleh out after learning about Daniel?? Who is the one who was pacing downstairs in the station & making sure Buck was okay after the warehouse, and the one who warned him about his visitors??

Who was the one praying at Bobby’s bedside, right next to Buck in the hospital?

(I’ll give you a hint, it’s not the dude that’s had 10 minutes of fucking screen time that everyone forgot about post s1.)

It wouldn’t have been the same bc TOMMY AND EDDIE ARE NOT THE SAME. They are not on the same level of knowing Buck & understanding when to make jokes & what jokes to make. Your best friend, partner & co-parent of 6 years and the man that you haven’t even called your boyfriend yet are not on the same level of familiarity.

I get that you’re pissed that Tommy is being compared to Buck’s previous love interests (which would be the case, even if he wasn’t just as shitty & uninterested in Buck as a person as they all were) but if you genuinely think that he’s anywhere near Eddie’s level, EVEN PLATONICALLY, then I fear that you have been watching another show entirely, & I encourage you to watch more than just s7, bc that’s the only explanation I can come up with for why this fuck ass take exists.

[fracturedodr]

"...If you're sure." Is his eventual response. Bell certainly wasn't about to fight him on it, as he got the idea that Hogni, even now, valued Bell's own well being well over his own. Which, while flattering, worried him a little. "You matter too, though." For all that Hogni probably didn't think that right now.

All the more reason to say it though, right? Hogni would believe it more coming from him. ...Hopefully.

Speaking of hope - Bell found he hoped that noone had opted to wait up for them, that noone in Hestia Familia had caught on to Hogni preferring nighttime activity over daytime, that they'd more likely show back up at night rather than mid-day. So - he paused, at the door.

"He... probably wouldn't think to stay up." Bell replies. "He wouldn't s-see a reason to, if he thought everything would go well. If he knew where we were going. That we were going." And why would he think otherwise, with a level 5 and 6 going into the dungeon? If Hogni could go down so much deeper, why would Hedin think there'd be a reason to worry? "I don't think he'd mind being woken up if it was you though, if you're..." Married. Important to each other. "And if-" He continued, after a pause, "if someone's awake, and they start to yell, I'll... I'll tell them off. So you don't have to." Bell was tired enough (and hollow enough) he found he didn't really care what expressions they might make - it was not a good time for yelling.

He knew himself well enough to know he'd deeply regret any short-tempered-ness later, but right now he was just too mentally and emotionally wrung out for it. He wanted to sleep. He wanted to decompress.

He wanted somebody to hold him like Freya used to before he'd realized she was lying

"...Okay..." Bell breathed, "time to... see who's mad." Lili, he guessed. Maybe Hestia. Possibly both, if he was really unlucky.

Another moment to gather himself - and to let Hogni perhaps also try to gather himself - and Bell pulled open the door, trying to be as quiet as possible on the off chance there was noone waiting for them to finally reappear.

"...I can manage...a few hours..." Hogni answered, clearly still averse to talking at the moment, but he didn't know how else he was going to communicate with Bell.

They entered through the front gate, but went around back still, as to not draw too much attention to themselves. That went relatively well, even though Hogni expected to see Hedin waiting for him immediately. Perhaps he was still sleeping? No...he was an early riser. Not seeing him right away was...odd.

"...Hedin might be sleeping," he didn't want to check. He rubbed his arm nervously. He didn't want to be questioned why he looked the way he did...

He was so drained, sleep would probably come easily.

[kairithemang0]

it's so damn sad that i have 500+ of you and no one gives a shit that i am curled up on the floor crying holding my old stuffed cat because it's the only thing that hasn't left me and trying not to have a full on break down and jump out a window, but you will just at the chances to correct my shitty behaviors the moment i even momentarily fuck up. suck my dick/not a threat. jesus christ

i am tired. take what i say tonight with a grain of salt. i can't type due to the fact every ounce of liquid in my body is pouring out through my eyes while i try to convince myself life is worth living.