#and i was so normal about it btw that's not even me making a joke i had such good normal guy slay back then
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hey kai!
can you please write a fanfic about dae ho comforting us after a game. (with a one bed trope 👉👈)
btw love ur writing smm!!🎀
EEEE I LOVE THIS REQUEST!!! dae ho is my shayla😭 (TW: Blood, gunshots, talk of death. let me know if there's more i should've added!) This is also for my favourite kang dae-ho stan @lanadelreyworshipperr
Kang Dae-Ho x reader ────୨ৎ──── The gunshots rang from the distance as you covered your ears, your palms pressed tightly against the shell, till all you could hear was a faint ringing. You whimpered quietly as you look at the blood pooled on the floor. How quickly had they cleaned up the bodies? The smell of blood made you gag as you choked out desperate sobs. "I wanna go home..." Your teammates Gi-Hun and Dae-Ho picked you up from the floor as you took in shallow breaths. You couldn't hear anything, not their words, not the other players talking and rushing out to go back to the bunks. No. The only thing you could still hear were bodies thudding the floor and the harsh sounds of the bullets leaving their guns to pierce through the heads of the innocent people. You couldn't breathe. Everything looked blurry for some reason, getting darker and faded. If you hadn't died from losing the game, you'd surely die from this panic attack. You saw Gi-Hun run to go to Jung-Bae and Young-Il, but Dae-Ho stayed with you. You sniffled and tried to recognise the world around you, trying to ground yourself in this terrifying situation but nothing worked. It wasn't until a certain former marine picked you up from the ground, hugging you close and carrying you bridal style back to the beds through the obnoxious amount of stairs. You curled against his chest and sniffled, hearing his heartbeat and coming back to reality just enough to croak out his name to tell him you were fine and awake, "Dae-Ho..." You moved you hand to your face, wiping the remaining tears. Dae-Ho looked at you with kindness shining in his eyes. A kindness people here seemed to have forgotten, "Ah, you're coming back to us. I know it's scary but I'll protect you, ok?" His voice was so soft as he put you down to your bunk. You hadn't even realised you both had reached the bedroom already. You hand was still grasping at the sleeve of his jumpsuit like your life depended on it, and quite frankly, you felt like it did depend on it. You felt yourself slip away when he started to go back. Nobody was really paying and attention at you both and thanks to Gi-Hun, your mattresses were in a perfectly hidden spot. "Dae-Ho, stay with me?" You asked, feeling tears prickle your eyes again, you weren't sleeping yet you could feel the nightmare that would haunt you for multiple nights on end. You also felt pathetic. Everyone here was so strong, even Jun-Hee who was pregnant and here you were. You couldn't go a single game without crying. Dae-Ho's eyes softened and you could swear you saw a fondness in his eyes. Though he quickly hid it. "Of course I will. I promise that no matter what happens in these games, I'll never leave you." He said it with such surety that you two would stick together, it couldn't help but make you optimistic as well. Dae-Ho settled on your mattress besides you and took this opportunity to curl up into him even more, "I feel so dumb." His hands found their way into your hair and gently massaged your scalp. "You're not dumb. Panicking in a scene like this is... normal. I'd be surprised if you weren't. I know I am as well." He joked and you couldn't help but smile as you buried your head in his chest. "It doesn't look like it. You're so brave." You muttered and looked up at Dae-Ho's face, it was rigid for a second before turning back to the soft, smiling face she liked. "Yeah, well, you're my sunshine and you're crying. That doesn't seem right either, does it?" Dae-Ho wiped another tear that had fallen from your eyes and gently pressed his lips against your forehead. You close your eyes, feeling the exhaustion from the day finally bring you down. You fought against your sleep and also blushed at the kiss he had just given you. "Dae-Ho..." "Go to sleep, sunshine." He said and cupped your cheek, his thumb brushing against the soft round skin of your face. You gulped in fear and held him closer. "Only if you stay..." You said and pressed your forehead against Dae-Ho's, breathing in and out, slowly, following the pattern of his breathing.
He smirked and leaned closer, the tip of his nose brushing against the tip of yours, "I'll always stay." He whispered to you like a promise and before you knew, you were drifting to sleep in his arms. ────୨ৎ────
#kai's coffee order 🧸ྀི#squid game#squid game s2#squid game x reader#squid game x you#dae ho x reader#dae ho#player 388#player 388 x reader#kang dae ho#kang dae ho x reader#kang dae ho x y/n
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Wow, what an interesting premise, I can't wait to see where this fic/comic/etc goes-
*Lilith character assassination*
#guys I was so normal about fandom before Hazbin i promise#now i'm holding Lucifer behind me like 'Ah AH no you don't get to play with this until you give thought to Lilith's character and situation#I don't even need her to be good I just want her interesting#make her the fucking butt of the joke if you have to just do something#they were married for 10 000 years how can you be so taken by Lu and so uninterested in that giant piece of him#this is also how I feel Adam btw#You're not allowed to do anything new with him until you've establish Eve and her effect on him#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel lucifer#hellaverse#hazbin hotel lilith#hazbin hotel adam
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guys hear me out would painis cupcake pay taxes? Because he’s not like mega insane like ass pancakes I think he’d pay his taxes in my professional opinion.
#I also had a conversation with my friend about if he had to wear a suit why would he#We discussed for a very long while(6 minutes) and the discussion was very enlightening#Slowly turning painis into a functional human in society…#Except you know he eats people that isn’t really stuff normal people do#this is a joke btw#I think he would pay his taxes but if the tax people are rude to him he wouldn’t#I think it really depends#Does he even have any taxes to pay? Because he doesn’t have a job I assume so he doesn’t have any money#But theoretically if he’s like working for another freak and he’s getting paid or something#Idk guys I might be going a little bit bonkers… he’s helping me get out of art block at least#Oh I hope all these tags don’t accidentally show up in another tag that would be bad I’ve seen that happen#I’ve already typed so much though#It’d be funny if there was painis angst because I wouldn’t be able to take it seriously because his name is penis basically#Why am I only saying painis I’m going to tag him anyway#Painis cupcake#there#alright anyways painis cupcake angst would be fucking hilarious imo#My professional opinion#Mmhmmm I’m a professional in being stupid#My friends will call me spedpool on hallowen#I took 2 yardsticks in stem and I pretended to be said guy in the red suit I don’t want to tag him because I don’t want someone to#Find this unhinged rant about painis cupcake that got way off track woah#Ok continuing on the painis rant#I can’t draw him with pencil for some reason he looks so weird#I can draw soldeir just fine with pencil probably even better than online but whenever I try to draw painis he looks like a pile of dog shi#A moist pile the kind that would make steam if it’s cold outside#I feel like it he tried painis cupcake would really be a great functional citizen#Oh wow I wrote a lot my bad
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@thehelplessmortals shared this with me and...Penelope coded.
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She definitely tried to gross out Odysseus in a dumb "You think you can handle me, idiot? >:) " way. (She's stubborn and in denial at first. When she realizes she actually likes him, she's a mess.) And while eating raw fish is normal for naiad-born in Sparta, when she learned Odysseus wasn't used to naiads in daily life, she just really went wild with it.
He's just staring at her kind of expressionless and she thinks "Ha, see? You don't really like me."
But he's just like
"You like carp? Cuz if you do, we got plenty on Ithaca! Many more fish too! And if we don't, I'll get you some!"
And she's annoyed because her plan didn't work. Girlie is self-sabotaging even though she thinks he's neat.
#this is normal for naiads but she also doesn't have impulse control. She'll jump in mid-convo.#...part of the joke is that basically no one eats carp because they're fucking disgusting :D same with catfish...at least where I live#Helen: “uh...I could just shock the water and then you could get them.”#Penelope: “Where's the sport in that?! >:( ”#It's not like a “playing hard to get” she just genuinely doesn't believe he could possibly like her and being a shit about it.#“Helen's supposed to get the happy ending. not me” (which Helen even is like “you're an idiot”) she eventually gets#her act together :D she's overwhelmed right now. especially since he's just head over heels and just... a LOT as he doesn't know#what to do with these feelings either and she gets mad at him for constantly talking about marriage “The more you say it. the less I wanna"#especially with his reputation to bully and fuck with people. and the fact that he lied to her so much when they first met. she doesn't#trust him. He's overwhelming her and then she's finally like. “if you're so interested. we're doing things at my pace.” then things get chi#they're both so used to putting up their guard that they can't genuinely believe this could be something wonderful#she actually is kind of afraid of the fact that “...Do you just have a thing for Naiads?? since you're not used to them?” are you weird?#but he interacts fine with other naiads. and isn't affected by Helen.#shot by odysseus#Mad rambles#my headcanons#odypen#btw. she chew through bone technically :D fish bone but bone#kind of want to make a “moodboard for the Water Wife”#penelope#Water Wife
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yesterday i spent 45 minutes of my life watching a video essay criticising the use of cheap shock values and crossing of taboos for a video game and i went from "he has a point even if he's explaining it in a really inflammatory way" to "oh umm... i can see how he thinks that way even if i don't agree" to "oh this guy's just straight up using people on tumblr as material for an audience to get mad at like other outdated people on the internet. nvm he's just an asshole"
#yuu rambles#it was about the coffin of andey and leyley btw - i agreed w him on the first half of the video about how it felt rather noncommittal to it#concepts and themes but i recognise its not really *trying* to be serious which means its not a reasonable#framework to judge the intention and execution of its work - an apple pie does use butter in it but just bc it does#doesnt mean you get to compare it to steak; a dish that also uses butter. this is intuitively easy to understand for me#but nonetheless it was like 3 am i had stuff to do so i just put it on my background to listen#he makes a diss at “people on tumblr” early on that i just raised my eyebrow at but shrugged it off bc its such an old joke#its lost its zinger; and im p sure its just confirmation bias from going into the tags of the thing you dont like lol if you use tumblr#normally you wouldn't come across things you dont like bc you'd have blocked them. But Anyways#then at the end he got sooo self righteous about how people on tumblr are insane and weird and showed screencaps about how twisted everyone#who likes the game are. there were some screenshots of people's post that were like “incest is bad and shouldn't be explored in media.#paragraph break‚ me who is an incest survivor and finds it helpful for working through my trauma: lol”#those types of post. but then lmfao he started going out of pocket and just mentioned the lists of other people he doesnt like which are#a screenie of a video essay about how kink is important at pride#and then some other stuff i dont remember anymore w the tumblr screenies#it was very mockingly written and said and at the end of it i felt sad i couldnt#block people on youtube lmao. like its not i dont want this guy to comment on my videos. i dont want to see his channel involuntarily#recommended to me ever again. just resorted to the most base sort of trolling behaviour he accused and judge other game devs for in his#video essay. good fucking god. the psychological projection is unreal#i dont have any strong feelings towards the game at the end of it even though i thought i would be like Eugh at first#but my bleh for any cheap gimmicks is overshadowed by my disdain for this guy's reliance on self righteous rhetoric#i discovered another new channel i really like tho after that vid!! bc i had to watch smth else to cleanse my palate lmao#they're jacob geller and freddydude! ive only seen one vid from freddydude about his essay on#detention‚ the horror game set in taiwan during the era of white terror under new cn leadership after ww2#im personally quite jumpy so his humour and the way he edits his videos to make it silly even though its Scary#made me like it a lot!! im going through jacob geller's other vids but ive watched three specific types of terror#and the one about pinocchio which made me go :00 wow his scripts are super good!#again everything at your own discretion esp w the whole james somerton shit�� but i enjoyed what I've seen so far#i just wanted to end this in a somewhat positive note JSHDKSJDJD the ramblings Continue...#theres a pedantic error in one of ky tags but im gonna update it when im on comp bc mobile sucks smh my head
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anyway back to thinking about fionna and cake for the night because simon compels me
#random thoughts#adventure time#petribell compels me...#honestly the idea of this fifty sixty something man busting it down with a thirty something and THAT being what fixes him???#like the opposite of what usually happens#usually this would be a midlife crisis but his life is already so goddamn weird#this would be like the most normal thing he could do#it's so fucking funny like hold on#like i appreciate the jokes ive seen about simon being like a fucking horndog??? have yall seen those#just like elizabethian levels of 'this man has not fucked in centuries'#i do think that if simon and fionna got together it would very much be a 'rpg hero and his besotted wife keeping the home' dynamic#simon IS a house husband. he fucking gardens. knits.#no wait hold on how fucking funny if in the new season they address how simon is so fucking old he's gonna die like sooner rather than later#how advanced is their medical technology regarding old world humans and would simon use it#cuz like simon is human classique. his medical needs are likely very different from other future humans. even finn!#how long do humans live. are they gonna give simon a bonkers robot body#anyway how funny would it be if simon somehow got deaged and THEN he and fionna get together#marceline's just like 'you boyified my dad???'#btw if simon and fionna arent physically in the same room in the next season like at all ill be so mad#like at least have them message each other once per episode i live for their fucked dynamic#anways simon has like ten twenty years tops#will they address it or will they just like casually stay in the timeline where they don't have to think about it#DID WE SEE SIMON IN THE DEATH WORLD IN TOGETHER AGAIN#like full on i think they'll somehow make simon immortal#he will somehow deage it'll be weird#they'll do a too young it'll be great#fionna being into simon is in character for her btw as far as finns go#they're into older people like as a species#boing
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I’m making this post for me for my brain for my sorting little thinker
The Ideal Polycule is of course made up of three different Self Ships, of which have their own separate S/Is with different dynamics and personalities. I, the real human person who smooches the full polycule, am sort of the combination of the three of them.
This is just a quick summery post of them as separate S/Is and their story as it currently is in their own Universe. I don’t know how to summarize things so forgive me I’m long winded.
Does any of that make sense? No? Cool keep scrolling. If you somehow understood that and want to know more, keep reading. Uh also Spoilers for Assassination Classroom and Danganronpa
Doctor Emile Hides - Assassination Classroom
Age: 20-21
Gender: Agender - He/Him
Sexuality: Panromantic, Asexual
Self Shipped with: Koro-Sensei
Other Affiliations: Karasuma + Irina (Friends), All of class 3-E (Students)
Most Prominent Traits:
Klutzy
Comically Bad at Cooking
Still learning Japanese
Arrives Late to most everything
Classic “boy genius” trope levels of Smart
Emile came to be the stand in Nurse for class 3-E soon after their return from Okinawa, where his medical knowledge would have surely been useful during the poisoning incident. It was a decision made by Karasuma, and urged by Koro-Sensei. The kids do some dangerous stuff, they could use an on sight professional.
He is not an assassin, nor does he plan to try his hand at killing Koro-Sensei, he’s just a collage student studying abroad who was picked up by Asano as a “good enough” for E Class.
Immediately he was fascinated by Koro-Sensei, or “Koro-San” as he calls him, and began doing his best to study the unkillable teacher in between bandaging students. Emile’s focus was Biology, and he eventually filled an entire notebook with questions and drawings about Koro-Sensei and, without much thought, presented it too the teacher, asking if he’d be willing to answer them.
Koro-Sensei agreed, filling out most of the questions in the notebook.. in Kanji. Which Emile couldn’t read. He also swore the Doctor not to show the book to anyone else, which Emile had agreed too. This was Koro-Sensei’s way of helping Emile learn Japanese.
The two spent a lot of time together after that, Koro-Sensei offering to tutor Emile in Japanese after class, which eventually lead to Koro-Sensei flying Emile home most nights, as they’d study so long in the faculty room Emile would miss the last train home.
Emile eventually confesses his romantic feelings for Koro-Sensei after soon after Reaper Time, and while Koro-Sensei is hesitant for multiple reasons, the two end up an official couple, which Koro-Sensei then cannot keep to himself and blabs about to the entire class.
During Winter Break Emile stays with Koro-Sensei in the empty Class E building, and studying possible ways to keep him from self destructing. This becomes his obsession until mid February on his birthday when Koro-Sensei finally convinces him to put it down and spend what time they have left together.
Emile wasn’t on the mountain during Koro-Sensei’s final moments, he’s not an assassin, he couldn’t evade the military like the students. Instead he called Nakamura to his apartment the night the students where infiltrating the mountain and asked her to deliver to Koro-Sensei his Birthday Cake, the first successful thing Emile had ever cooked.
Post timeskip Emile has settled into being a school nurse, specifically at the High school Nagisa has come to teach at. He joins class 3-E in cleaning up the mountain every year on Koro-Sensei’s birthday, and brings homemade sweets for them every year.
The Ultimate Collector V2 - Danganronpa 3 (Despair Arc)
Age: 16-18 (unclear)
Gender: Trans Man - He/Him
Sexuality: Frayromantic, Asexual
Self Shipped with: Teruteru Hanamura
Other Affiliations: The Ultimate Collector V1 (twin brother), Hifumi + Celeste Chihiro + Kazuichi + Sonia + Gundham + Chiaki (Friends)
Most Prominent Traits:
Socially Anxious to the point of occasional Mutism
Picky Eater
Comically bad sense of direction
Has everything one could ever need in his bag at all times
Very OCD and protective of his things
Emile is a very quiet, shy, introverted person who, upon being separated from his twin brother, tended to keep to himself as much as possible and blend into the background. Being an Ultimate at Hope’s Peak didn’t really matter to him, he’d preferred to stay in his room with all his things nearby.
Moving to the dorms on campus was extra hard for Emile. Despite his title as the Ultimate collector the school didn’t allow him to bring his entire collection with him. Being so far away from all his favorite things was just too much stress for Emile, causing him to shut down even more than he would have already.
Teruteru Hanamura was the only one in the class to notice Emile didn’t eat lunch and took the responsibility to keep his classmate fed into his own hands. Despite Emile’s blatant refusal to speak, he didn’t mind being spoken to, leading to Teruteru to slowly, through questions and trials and errors, to learn what things Emile could and couldn’t eat as he shared his lunch with his fellow student every day.
Teruteru got use to one sided conversations. He took pleasure in cracking a smile on Emile’s face with his jokes, or when he’d say something so awful the quiet student couldn’t stop himself from unfurling to give him a slap on the shoulder. The first time Emile had the courage to speak to Teruteru sent him over the moon.
Emile only got better through Teruteru’s friendship. Despite being easily everyone’s least favorite classmate, Teruteru was still able to worm himself and Emile into group activities, forcing the collector into social situations that slowly opened him up to the rest of the class.
The next year, when Emile’s brother joined the 78th class as The Ultimate Collector Again, Emile found himself opening up even more, mingling between both classes along with Teruteru. Even joining an anime club his brother, Hifumi, and Celeste had started.
When the biggest most awful most tragic event in human history struck, Emile fell into Despair along side the rest of his class, but instead of becoming an ultimate despair like them, folded in on himself again, shutting down into himself, becoming an immobile shell of a person.
Teruteru ended up taking Emile with him as he caused destruction and despair throughout the world, taking care of the other like a doll. At some point, due to his new cannibalistic habits, Teruteru safely removed and ate one of Emile’s legs.
Because of this, during the hope Program, Emile was considered more of a victim than an Ultimate Despair, and was not put into the simulation with the other students, but acted as more of a beta test to see if the system could work to recover the rest of his class from despair. During the events of the game Emile watches along side Future Foundation, waiting for his friends to come back to him.
Home-Run Hero; Gumball - My Hero Academia
Age: 29
Gender: Agender - He/She
Sexuality: Panromantic, Asexual, Polyamourus
Self Shipped with: Taishiro Toyomitsu (Fatgum)
Other Affiliations: Tamaki Amajiki + Eijiro Kirishima + Tetsutetsu Tetsutetsu + Momo Yoayorozu + Nirengeki Shoda (Adopted kids), Kendo Rappa (Taishi’s Stalker/Eventual addition to the polycule)
Quirk: Bubblegum - Gumball’s saliva has all the properties of Bubblegum. Upon being blown into a bubble, the gum will harden into a hard plastic ball, typically around the size of a baseball.
Most Prominent Traits:
Affectionately a Bully
Extremely Agile
Will eat almost anything without question
Avid PDA offender on both Taishiro and their kids
Weak to Heat
Emile and Taishiro were classmates at Shiketsu High, their relationship started on one of annoyance, as Emile was far too touchy and nosy for Taishiro at the time. Emile sat in front of Taishiro, and took every spare moment to spin around and pester him with questions about himself, class, his quirk, the other students, and so on.
During their first sparring session, Taishiro was rather excited to have teacher’s permission to beat on the annoying kid who sat in front of him. However, due to his poor quirk management back in the day, Taishiro didn’t have near as much fat built up as he does now, and ended up on his ass at Emile’s hand multiple times.
After that, Emile was constantly offering Taishiro things to eat. Every time he turned around to talk to him in class, he’d come with something tasty and some tips on preserving fat cells. It took a while, but Taishiro eventually realized this was Emile’s attempts at being nice, in his own, slightly annoying ways, and slowly the two became real friends. Though Emile thought they were already besties.
Shiketsu is a very strict school, the students are to focus on their Hero Studies; No dating, no extra curriculars, strict curfews, ridged dorm expectations. Breaking the rules could risk immediate expulsion. But despite it all Emile ran free, broke curfew and snuck in and out whenever he pleased, typically dragging Taishiro along with him. He joined a local Baseball team without the school’s permission, and invited Taishiro to all his games. He had sleep over’s in his classmate’s rooms, and slept in the common area, and his contraband all throughout the dorms. The only rule he hadn’t actively broken was no dating.
Taishiro, slowly, found himself being thankful for that, because if that rule wasn’t in place, he’d asked Emile out right then and there. And if he’d found out his friend was dating someone, or asked someone out, Taishiro wasn’t sure his heart would ever recover.
Upon becoming Pro Heroes, Emile and Taishiro went their separate ways for a while. Emile falling more into the “Idol Hero” roll, as he joined a professional Quick Baseball League, where as Taishiro kept their high school streak of rule breaking alive and became an Undercover Hero breaking up fight clubs and chasing drug dealers under the radar. This is where most of their 20′s were spent.
They kept well in touch, back and forth whenever their schedules lined up, which was rare and always brief. Taishiro got better at saving up fat for his quirk, Emile became more and more of a heavy hitter, they grew older and wiser from their high school days of breaking out of the dorms at night, and eventually Emile confessed to Taishiro.
Soon after he joined the Fatgum agency, still playing Clean Up hitter for his own Baseball League, but mostly slowing down steadily into Hero Work, and apparently parenting as the Fatgum agency gains more and more interns every year.
#Emile's Arts#Self Insert#Self Ship#Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaugh this took me all day it wasn't supposed to take all day it was just going to be a summer thing sdklfjsdkjgkds#I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm so annoying I KNOW#I just dsfkjsdfkjkds My BRAIN#Look their singular plot synopsis posts are super bad and out dated#And for SOME REASON instead of sorting by Fandom like I normally do I chose to do THIS#It's the poll I made a which S/I is best poll but none of you know anything about these three#Well now you do#The answer is Gumball btw Gumball is the best he's cool and a Dad#And I'm realizing now he and Taishiro are probably not legally married but they certainly call eachother their husbands#NO ONE QUESTION ME ABOUT MOMO AND SHODA BEING IN THE INTERNS I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT#THEY BELONG HERE#I never know how to deal with Despair Teruteru because I KNOW how he works and what he does and all that#And it happens to be one of my triggers but no like I'll fall apart if it's too close to me more like#I just don't. Like it. And hearing about it makes me want to vomit#But it's COOL as a narrative thing!!!#I didn't write the collector into DR2 because Teru and Imposter die in trial 1 and they were my favorites right out the gate so#More just some normal highschool fluff for me#My AssClass S/I has changed the least out of all my S/Is and probably has the most concrete timeline#But that's just because out of these three Assassination Classroom is the most well written by like a mile#Watch Assassination Classroom this is no longer a request#It's almost March now is the BEST time to watch AssClass actually#I remember being super emotional about Teruteru for a very long time because he's played as such a joke#That he ends up hard isolated from the rest of his class#and the anime didn't even give him a school uniform!! Or at least a DIFFERENT OUTFIT like Kazuichi got#so he feels even MORE isolated like!!! He has no friends the hell!!!!!!#So I am forcing him to make friends by forcing him to force me to make friends#AssClass me is so much Just some guy like that's his whole thing he's just a guy
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miss having a huge crush on my close friend when I was sixteen that was so good bad good bad evil good for me
#like it was BAD. but it was good. it passed the time#it's the only real real crush i ever had tbh 🤔#and i was so normal about it btw that's not even me making a joke i had such good normal guy slay back then#well. comparatively...#tbh the crush itself was great because we were incredibly close and i never had delusions of is actually getting together#i knew it wouldn't happen so i just was happy to spend time w them#and we're still friends now <3 they r my riverdale irl 😁🫶#the evil stuff was all of our friends who looking back were so insanely jealous of our friendship for no reason#we'd talk about or agree on or do anything and they'd make fun of us saying we were gfs or in love or whatever#and as someone who was closeted and did have a crush it was. so stressful.#anyway. I'm not friends with any of those guys anymore they were so horrible i had to make a graceful exit in yr 12. yikes!#hope you enjoyed that little piece of my lore <3#.txt
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refused to get my teeth pulled today bc the dr was an asshate PhD in mansplaining. he wouldn't even look me in the eye. every time he should've looked me in the eye he straight up closed his eyes and would talk to me with his eyes closed.
anytime i would bring up a concern or a complication i was worried about developing he'd be like 'yep so that's a complication that's possible.'
like yeah thats doing nothing for me bud i knew it was possible. it's why im fucking asking about it and asking if you think im personally more likely to experience it.
#bro was soo annoying#became so much more friendly when i said 'yeah im not going to get any teeth pulled today. it isnt necessary and it's not worth the risk'#suddenly it was all hey lets make jokes (((about my medical conditions))) and let me adopt a completely different tone thats singificantly#less stern and 'talking down on you' and more 'im just a normal person'#it was reassuring to actually be able to see my xrays#every single dentist ive had before refused to let me see them#refused.#including my current one who was oh so desperate to get money from his tooth removal referral#who regularly does not do fillings when youre there for fillings and instead does cleanings.#who every single time without fail intentionally fucks up the filling so you have to go back in a week later (ive gotten over 12 fillings#with him. every single one had at least one complication)#but no all of my wisdom teeth are straight in#not rubbing on any other teeth#theyre fine.#they cause no issues either.#im not gonna give two asshole dudes a paycheck and almost certainly cause nerve damage#one of my roots runs right through my nerve. one of the teeth thats completely emerged btw so theres no need to remove.#and thats my biggest cocern. like literally idc abut anything else but if i get nerve damage it's over#if i had permanent nerve damage i would kill myself. no joke.#and i told him thats my biggest concern and he just wrote me off entirely#noppppe not trusting you with my literal life when youre so blasé about my biggest concern#bad enough i sat in that office for over an hour just waiting for them and then waiting even longer bc they#made me watch a completely unrelated video about dental implant surgery for ten whole minutes#when i was getting wisdom tooth removal.
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actually i hate when people take ace attorney out of the context it was made in. like im just as clueless about the details as anyone else, and its true its heavily fictionalised and mostly not a really serious representation of anything, but at least akcnowledge that that context exists when you talk about it. cause otherwise its just stupid, like everything youre saying is just random words and nothing actually to do with the series
#i mostly mean when people actually discuss stuff in it for a proper answer not just jokes and fanfics but ill admit that annoys me as well#stupid and petty as that is#i do think its legit though when youre actually trying to analyse it i mean come on#like why bother if youre just going to completely misinterpret everything like how do so many people not even know what country it is#cause guess what#funnily enough everything about america is completely and absolutely irrelevant#and yes obviously its clear what my meaning is and im not talking about the irrelevent exceptions#as interesting as i personally find the american influences on japanese society considering not just the american global hegemony#but also the post ww2 occupation and political system that was established then not that i know anything about it really#but i am a bit curious how much influence america has actually had on a country that everyone always sees as totally seperate to the west#and obviously in the modern world everywheres influenced by outside cultures and western countries (dont know what people in japan think)#way of seeing japan as particularly different to everywhere elseis definitely at least partly total rubbish#it actually seems like a very 'normal' country even if youve never been out of europe otherwise#perhaps to me the reason american influence stands out is cause im not used to main english language ans western cultural influence#being america it definitrly makes it stand out as odd like how much of this is america and how much is japan when you dont know either#anyway japan doesnt have more american influence (culturally) it just stands out more obviously#what have i got to going on about#anyway this was actually about ace attorney#well i can say they got the gavel from america anyway apparently thats a pop culture thing no other real life coursts have it#japan didnt get its legal system from america anyway or at least not partly#its civil law system which is something most aa fans dont seem to understand#funnily enough cause civil vs common law systems is literally school level stuff#i mean there literally seems to be a decent amount of aa fans that dont even realise that yes the law stuff is based off japans system#i mean ??? like yeah its not realistic but do people not realise that not every legal system is identical#and it being based off a different country is just as much of a reason for differences as video game seriously#this is coming from someone who doesnt care about law in the slightest btw its still utterly aggravating#like obviously most people realise it was a lot influenced by stuff about actual japanese law even though its not serious or realistic#its still relevent when youre talking about it but its still annoying how many people try to analyse it ignoring this
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NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! THIS ISNT FAAAAIIIRRRR !!!!!!!!!!! LIFE. ISNT. FAAAAAAAAIIIIIRRRRRR !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
These are all so beautiful. Looks like some prototypes that never got past this point.
Sobbing at the only full Milly figure I've ever seen.
#WHYYYYYY BROOOOO !!!!????!!#WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE MEEE DEATH AND DESPAIR FOR BOBO#there are never any actual Knives figures....duhhddouhhDUHHHOUHHHH. He has so much potential for good figures i dont understand its#and this bro...bro dont even eith me roght now#with the PLANTS !??? GRWAAUAGHH !!!! AAAUABHHHH !!!!!! ID GO BROKE IMMEDIATELY ARE YOU FUCJING JOKING#no more prototypes.....make them...NOOOOWWWW !!!!! ill be in debt buying them all if i have to#KNIVES PLANT FIGURE PLAAASEEE BE REAAAAALLLL#im probably going to have dreams about this again Knives figures keep showing up in my dreams#that Milly is so fucking cute too...life isnt fair....#if Knives gets nothing wow Milly gets NOTHING. im so sorry girl i love you 😢💖#also im referencing the bill cipher so sad video....btw....#im not going to be normal about this for awhile#his stupid ass big shoulders omfg death and despair for bobo#if Knives plant fighre inst real than what else am i going to throw at the wall. society these days.
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i just feel like if you cant debate someone w/o insulting them then you're kinda just using it as an outlet for all of your asshole-ness
#you shouldnt have assholeness inside you anyways but. if you do you probably grew up thinking its just like. socially normal#instead of idk. trying to get along?? theres no reason you gotta insult ppl esp for things they cant change#it also makes you look lazy in the way u argue#yes yes ik i call ppl dipshits a lot but to me its more of a 'im worried about u/ur wellbeing/ppl around u for u not knowing better'#rather than a:#'hah u idiot loser ur so dumb and im so so much smarter and cooler and faster than you heh' kinda thing that some ppl do 😒😒😒#ig that can be a bit patronizing but id prefer that over someone whos just an immature full-of-themselves asshole tbh#not tryna say its ok bc ppl dont necessarily know i mean it in that way when i say it but yeah. i dont think im the worst about this ill sa#that much and thats not the reason im posting about it. a looooooot of yall on here are waaaaaaaaay worse about it lmao.#i think we should all try to stop doing it. and that doesnt mean me trying harder than yall if anything yall need to try harder than me#oh and uh me telling you What It Is isnt the same as me insulting you. btw. at worst its patronizing when you Do know better#but otherwise im literally just trying to be helpful. even if it is snappy and said pettily sometimes 💁#at least i can rest easy knowing i tried being helpful rather than feeling like a self-proclaimed 'morally superior' egotistical jackass#💁💁💁💁💁#i dont know better! i know what i know and i work off of what i know and help people from where i come from and my own experience#i dont claim to know everything i dont stand on this rock claiming to conquer all that is to be known about it like some of yall do#i dont get on my high horse trying to preach to people abt How They Should Be Or Else They're Irredeemable (And Also I'm Perfect btw)#and if i ever do its for the least serious thing possible and im probably fuckin joking#and ig rn i am kinda doing a 'i do this better than you' thing but again its a#'i do this better than you. you should be able to do it as well as i do too or better. challenge urself to be better' thing rather#than 'haha look at me im so much smarter than you and better than you and more deserving! everybody praise me!!!' thing
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So, there's a lot I want to say about the paralypics, but every time I try I just... can't articulate what I want to say without it turning into a monster of a post that puts my writing advice posts to shame lol. This includes in response to the anonymous asks I got on the topic btw. So I'm going to try and summarise my thoughts here.
As someone who was working towards the Rio paralympics - who was basically one of the people they were actively training to be the next paralympians and who got to go if their choice first athletes had to drop out, the Olympics and paralympics are a... touchy subject for me. I loved playing. I loved my sport. I loved the people I played with. I loved the people I played against. But the way the public and people in power treats disabled athletes sucks. It Really really sucks. and it hurts to talk about.
The vast, vast majority of us aren't paid. We are expected to train at the same intensity as the Olympians with none of the breaks and none of the support to do so, resulting in injuries that are disabling in and of themselves, while juggling normal jobs. many of the paralympians are also in school or at university as well. both schools and jobs see these elite athletes as dedicated hobbiests at best.
I had a friend who were fired from their job because they were denied time off to compete at the paralypics and well, if i had to choose between the paralympics or stay at a shit job paying minimum wage, I know which one I'd pick, and so she didnt have a job when she came back. I have friends who are still in the closet because their sponsors would drop them if they came out as gay, who ended years-long relationships to keep the funding that allowed them and their teams to compete - funding that just covered the costs of travel by the way. They never saw a cent of it themselves, but it was the difference between us having to pay $50 each for our plane tickets and accommodation and having to pay $2,000Aud + for every away game. I have friends who were supposed to go to Tokeyo but were kicked off the teams weeks before the games because of a rule change that decided they weren't disabled enough anymore, wasting years of work with absolutely no warning. They weren't even given the decency of an appology from the people who made the call. Several went through terrifying mental health spirals over it. It was their life's work, gone. I saw so many friends just give up because their disabilities were "too hard to classify" into the International Paralympic Commity's boxes and who were made to feel they weren't welcome by the system spouting off about its diversity and inclusion and empowerment of disabled people.
And then with all that, the best we can hope for is for the social media teams to turn us into a joke for ableds to laugh at or into inspiration porn to make them feel good about themselves - because at least theyre not us. Because obviously, there are no other options in how to show us/sarcasm.
My phone doesn't even have "paralympics" as a recognised word. I have a Samsung. The company that is currently at the paralympics using them as a marketing opertunity. We aren't even recognised as a word in the phones made by the company that is currently using the paralympics as a marketing opportunity. The phones they're giving the athletes won't even recognise the name of the event that they got it at. If I've spelt it wrong, it's because it autocorrects it every time I try to spell it right, and im dyslexic and can't see the difference until I stare at it for a minute or so.
I just... this isn't even scratching the surface of my thoughts. But I wanted to say at least some of it. It will be the last I'm going to talk about it, at least until the event is over.
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SYSTEM! SHEN YUAN AU
Okay, look, I've head a System SY idea for a while now (in fact, some of the ideas for this were used when I was first planning out Locked & Loaded), but after seeing @/artsarasp's System!SQQ AU, the brainworms have been once again come alive and I just need to get this out into the world. This is a very bare bones idea that I (probably) won't actually write, so walk with me for a second! Also this is going to be a very, very long post.
In this idea, the System actually is an interdimensional organization that deal with creating new worlds based on stories and making sure these worlds continue working as intended and (eventually), sending transmigrators to worlds that need 'improvement' (this improvement being very subjectice depending on which worker is assigned which story).
In SY's case, he's just someone who usually works behing a screen, in the most exciting cases he gets to guide transmigrators around but most of the time he just makes sure the stories 'code' is running normally and nothing world-breaking is going on in the stories (like someone managing to find a hack to skip defining plot points, or activating God-Mode somehow). He's very happy with this arrangement, btw! He was never one to run around and his boss has warned him once or twice for apparently being 'way too harsh' on the few transmigrators he got to be a System for.
Unfortunately, one day he is assigned to 'manually inspect' a world because a certain co-worker of his (Shang Qinghua) had been sent down there to handle a glitch but had gone missing instead. When SY asks why was he being the one asked to do this (not that he doesn't care for his friend, but he REALLY isnt made for running around), his boss says SY is the only other one who is familiar enough with the world to not get lost.
So that's how he find out SQH had managed to get himself stuck on the world he created (as a joke even, he hadn't even expected that when he was messing around with the company's program he would actually be able to create a new world based on the shitty novel he'd written as a human). And of course, SQH only having one friend, subjected SY to the story.
SY grumbles and denies ever seeing anything about SQH's story (or liking it, even if his boss kindly points out they never mentioned SY liked it) but eventually he agrees; and that's how he finds himself being teletransported onto the world of PIDW, carrying a pair of Debugging Sheers he'd never thought he would have to hold (he calls them Big Scissors), with the mission of finding SQH and dealing with the glitch that was still somewhere in the world.
Though, when he goes to message his supervisor about the specifics (where he should go or what was the last known location of SQH), he finds out that his Personal System has apparently already been affected by the glitch ("ALREADY??") that he was realizing worked more like a virus. Fortunately some messages were still going through, and his supervisor notified him they couldn't send him directly to the location he needed to be, specially because the virus seemed to have fragmented and spread to various parts of the stories timeline. SY now has to jump around through time a few times and slowly cut doen the glitches caused by the virus.
Thus begins Shen Yuan's Great Narrative Haunting (in real time.).
Luckily, for him, the place he first appeared was already one of the spots the virus has infected the world, and it seems to be in a town not too far away from him, so with a quick activation of the 'Ghost Mode' function (avaiable for all System staff to make it easier when they have to manually fix something, making them invisible and untouchable), SY heads to the town.
The glitch actually doesnt take too long to find (it was a buggy tree clipping onto a nearby river, which only needs a snip of the Big Scissors to disappear from reality), but when SY and passing through the town to find some better signal for his Personal System so he can jump forward to the next stop, he sees a group of snickering kids leaving an alleyway. A bit curious, he passes by the alley and barely manages to see through the pouring rain and spot a trembling figure on the floor. Of course, PIDW was never meant to be a happy or forgiving world, so SY is not surprised at the idea that some kids were bullying a smaller kid, though it still makes him upset.
He kneels close to the child and turns off 'Ghost Mode', pulling out an umbrella from his inventory (yes, System staff ALSO get an inventory, no one wants to have to carry aroung those big ass scissors), covering him from the rain. The boy is shaking from the cold, and even if SY can't check the boy's identity (since his system is still buggy), he reasons the probability of him coming into contact with an important character is very small, and even if System staff aren't supposed to interact with characters, he limits himself to at least getting the boy out of the rain.
Luo Binghe later wakes in a bench underneath a small shop's roof, covered in a thick cloth, having no idea how he'd gotten there besides the vague dream (or memory?) of a strangely dressed person patting his hair and taking him into their arms. He notices the rain has stopped and he's perfectly dry. Shen Yuan, seeing the kid seems to be doing well, finally jumps to his next location.
It doesn't take long for SY to figure out where he is when he loads onto the next mission location, in fact, he's almost certain he'd recognize the bamboo forest and calm, almost dream-like atmosphere of Qing Jing Peak anywhere. Seeing there that Qing Jing even exists in the first place, he deduces Binghe is still not emperor, so this time he makes sure to not be seen by any characters. It also doesn't take for SY to find his next target, as a commotion behind him catches his attention.
And oh, if he isn't familiar with the scene. A few older looking disciples push around a smaller looking boy, while a girl insistently shouts for the leader of the older disciples to stop. SY barely managed to appreaciate how Luo Binghe looks so cute as a child before (who he assumes is) Ming Fan snatches rips an amulet out of Binghe's neck. It's quite the heartbreaking scene to watch live, poor Binghe fighting for the only remaining piece of his adoptive mother without even knowing he's destined to never see it again. SY's Personal System may be buggy but it's still functional enough to detect if SY has a direct impact on the main storyline, so SY is basically forced to stand still and watch.
Though, since he had a clear view of the whole scene, when Ming Fan throws the jade pendant into the forest, SY can perfectly follow the arch of the necklace and sees where it landed, which is when an idea pops into his head. Distantly hearing Luo Binghe and NYY frantically searching for a necklace they'll never find, SY spots where the fake jade glimmers high up on a tree brench, though it's glimmer is distorted by the distinct sight of a glitch corrupting it's form. If SY were to follow standard procedure, he'd just have to bring out his Sheers and snip the necklace out of existence, but looking at it... Would it be so bad if he debugged the necklace the longer way?
Besides, if Binghe has the necklace or not, it's not like this one item is going to interfere with the major story anyways. SY isn't stopping Binghe from falling into the Abyss, he's just... Returning a lost item to it's intended owner.
Later, after an exhausting afternoon of what seemed to be searching through every nook and cranny of Qing Jing Peak's surrounding forest, Luo Binghe goes back to the shed he sleeps in utterly defeat and feeling strangely hollow; that is, until he opens the door and finds a new, thick blanket neatly folded in the middle of the shed, way too clean to be anything he had previously owned, and atop of it, his precious jade pendent, sitting there as if it never even dissapeared. Luo Binghe distantly notices that nobody that visits the shed ever lets the door closed after they visit.
The third location SY goes to leaves him no time to acclimatize, as he's immediately attacked by a beast, and only after (struggling to) kill it, does SY notice the unfortunate situation he was placed into: the Immortal Alliance Conference. By this point, he's already figured out his Personal System is most likely using Binghe's energy as Protagonist to make up for the energy it can't use due to it being partially corrupted, and the energy it needs to save up so SY can go back to the System's head quarters, so it really wasn't a surprise that he would be sent to this specific plot point, but dammit can't he avoid having to be near the place where his favorite character is thrown into hell??
And, well, there's also the problem that a beast attacked him, which meant it saw him, which meant his Ghost Mode was also glitching out, and after fiddling around which a half functioning System interface, it seems that the presence of the virus here is stronger than the other places, though still not the biggest chunk. Truly, just the cherry on top of his situation that he'd have to scurry around and somehow manage to not bump into anyone.
As is his luck, as SY tries to head closer to where his System is signaling the glitch's presence, other monsters continue attacking him, which besides slowing him down a considerable amount, it also causes the risk of him being picked up by the people watching the Conference through the Spirit Eagles circling the area, which is the last thing he needs.
Eventually he goes to the closest spot he can to the glitch, but a snapping sound behind him sends him into full panic. A person stands behind him, which leaves SY wondering how he managed to miss someone sneaking up on him like this. "You seem to have dropped something." the person says, and SY eyes immediately fall to his body, scanning himself to what he might have lost, and his hand basically flies to his throat when he notices the tassle that is usually nestled there is missing. He quickly turns around, only to come face to face to the golden protagonist, mister Luo Binghe himself.
Binghe tries interrogating SY as to what he's doing, sneaking around the supposedly sealed off Conference grounds, and SY, in his panicked state (slightly fuelled by a fanboy-induced craze) tries to fumble for excuses, but only when Binghe finally understands that the feeling he gets when looking at this strange person is an undeniable sense of deja-vu and tries asking SY if they'd met before, a loud rumblind shakes the ground: the Abyss has opened.
SY feels even more panicked, cause what this means is eventually, not only will he be discovered by Luo Binghe (his supervisor is going to kill him), but he could possibly be discovered by Shen Qingqiu, of all people! He doesn't get too much time to think about his grand escape however, as a piercing shriek comes from the Abyss rift. Right, how could he forget about the Black Moon Rhinoceros Python? And-- Oh, of course! Of course the damn thing would be virus-infected object!
After teaming-up with Binghe, the both of them manage to subdue the monster long enough that SY managed to snip it, though while they both catch their breath, SY belatedly realizes he just helped Binghe fight with the monster he was supposed to fight. Alone! The monster who was supposed to break his demonic seal! And, like clockwork, he can distantly hear what can only be SQQ's hurried steps through the forest! FUCK!!
With no other option, and Binghe now wanting to continue his interrogation, SY hurriedly start to walk towards the Abyss rift, frantically giving Binghe tips about what he could do in the Abyss to have an easier time, though when he catches a glimpse of green robes between the trees, SY types something on a floating screen and jumps backwards, Binghe letting out a shocked scream. Unfortunately, the protagonist won't be able to do nothing about the seemingly insane and way too familiar man who just jumped into the Abyss, as a rustling sounds behind him, and he's met with a newly regenrated Black Moon Rhino.
SY feels horrible about spawning a new one after Binghe just finished fighting one, but the story must continue, and with his Personal System finally free from most of the virus corruption, SY leaves one last gift as an apology and warping away before hitting the Abyss' ground. Later, when Binghe wakes up at the bottom of the rift after being pushed by SQQ, the first thing he sees is a qiakun pouch, full of useful items and tiny note at the bottom that reads 'Sorry!'
Pt.2
Pt.3
#sorry for any typos its literally 1am#this became to huge doe omg#im so sorry i thought i would manage to keep it simple#who am i kidding#when have i ever managed to keep an AU simple#svsss#drabble#fanfic#shen yuan#shen qingqiu#luo binghe#luo bingge#bingqiu#bingyuan#binggeyuan#this is binggeyuan btw#digital art#komm's system au
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american wedding l ln4
summary: lando dating zak brown's daughter leads to a lot of pr disasters, like getting married in vegas
notes: can be read as a part two to boss' daughter or a stand alone
masterlist
yourusername
liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri and 38,329 others
yourusername wasnt gonna drink tonight but i miss my bf like a mf.
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user real tbh
user i miss u like a mf. show ur face at a race already queen.
user no cause it's been forever since she went to one and i miss the chaotic content with her and lando
user you know damn well you were gonna drink regardless liked by yourusername
landonorris i miss u more😓 just drop out of uni and come to all my races
zbrownceo excuse me?
landonorris JUST A JOKE! ha ha ha.
user LANDO😭😭
landonorris but i just booked a flight to nyc because of this post btw. see you this weekend😈
yourusername i was about to start crying until i realized what emoji you used😐
oscarpiastri dont we have be at the mtc this weekened??
yourusername SHHHH OSCAH
landonorris yeah oscar shhh
user poor oscar is always getting tag teammed by those two
user lando getting that in-law privilege by skipping important meetings to see his boss' daughter😭
user i love this relationship's dynamic theyre so perfect for each other
f1gossip
23,432 likes
f1gossip Lando and Y/n's Brown's weekend in New York City! It seems Lando skipped his trip to the MTC to be with his girlfriend where they were pictured clubbing and walking around the city multiple times.
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user IN THE CLURB WE ALL FAM
user he finally met his match lol
user lando is a clingy drunk confirmed✅
user i really want to know what their drunk conversations sound like
user hot take but if she wasnt zaks daughter most of you guys would hate her
user shes making him blow off important meetings so he could be with her? she sounds like a distraction from racing
user girl what- her dad is literally the ceo? if there was an issue im sure he wouldve let them know bffr
user zak brown is probably tired of these two😭
user is partying all they do together?
user no cause she lowkey seems like a bad influence
user i agree🫣 shes always posting herself partying and drinking, thats not wag material
user she might be a pr nightmare but i stand with my canceled wife💜
landonorris
liked by yourusername, oscarpiastri and 820,429 others
landonorris nyc to vegas🛩 aaaand i brought the bad influence with
tagged yourusername
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user the caption IM-
user nah hes lowkey dissing y/n haters😭
user how did he bag someone 10x cooler than him
user the bottle of alcohol and the vape, she really is ready for vegas
user Y/N'S BACK!!!
yourusername vegas aint ready for us
landonorris no they arent😈
yourusername enough.
user no hate to the other wags but y/n is truly the realest one out of all of them
user fr she truly is just a normal girl in her twenties
oscarpiastri 🙂
yourusername what is that suppose that mean OSCAH!!! my father will hear of this
oscarpiastri ok calm down draco malfoy
user why is there lowkey beef between y/n and oscar LMFAO
yourusername he hates my swag!!!
oscarpiastri she brings a lotttt of energy to the garage when shes here🙂
user im crying at oscars response😭😭😭 hes had enough of yn and lando
user idk if her holding a bottle of alcohol is appropriate to post!
user pls grow up omg
yourusername
liked by carlossainz55, danielricciardo and 59,329 others
yourusername postt race partoes >>>>>> the avtual race
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user THEE party girl
user i need to party with them so bad
user lando.jpg when???
user the typos😭 shes already drunk
user yup theres already videos of her and lando drunkly dancing together all over twitter
user yeah and oscar was in the background of those videos looking miserable LMFAOO
user oh to be a wag partying in vegas with lando
yourusername posted a story
user i voted fall to my knees and cry btw…if you even care
user um this is a random question to ask at 3am…
user what stores are even open rn😭😭
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oscarpiastri Y/N??? IVE BEEN LOOKING FOR YOU AND LANDO FOR LIKE A HALF AN HOUR AT THE CLUB AND YOURE NOT EVEN HERE??
oscarpiastri if you guys dont pick up your phones i swear to god…
oscarpiastri of course i get stuck as babysitter to the two most drunk people at the party
yourusername heY oscah😊😊 sendingg u my lpcation now cuz we need a witness so come ASAPPPPPP
oscarpiastri WITNESS FOR WHAT?
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danielricciardo if this means what i think it means, youre both so dead🤣
user babes didnt u just post at the club like an hour ago
yourusername
liked by danielricciardo, landonorris and 1,392,321 others
yourusername do u guys thonk my dad will be mad thaT oscar walked me down the aislee?
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user OH MY GOD??
user mclarens pr team are going to have a rude awakening in the morning😭
user shes never beating the bad influence allegations i fear
user crazy to think that this time last year he was flirting with her through her instagram comments😭
user and now theyre married omg i remember everyone was teasing lando but he truly got the last laugh
carlossainz55 i dont know if i should congralute you guys or be concerned?
user mind you, its almost four in the morning in vegas
danielricciardo getting married is crazy, you should be at the club
yourusername u mak a grrat point! otw now
mclaren we cannot congratulate until the boss says its okay sorry😕
zbrownceo answer your phone.
oscarpiastri sir, i would like it to be known that she blackmailed to be there
yourusername okay snitch!
zbrownceo im not kidding y/n
danielricciardo ouuu youre in trouble
user its so over for them
user zak finally putting his foot down with these two LMFAO
f1gossip
25,532 likes
f1gossip Wedding celebrations at the club! Seems like the newlyweds are back partying after their wedding announcement was made just a few minutes ago. Congrats to them?
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user everyone is freaking out and theyre literally at the club im cryingg
user "congrats to them?" is literally all of us rn😭
user they are not real omg
user zak is probably blowing up their phones and they do not care at all lmfaooo
user truly winning the idgaf war
user real question is are they getting an annulment once they sober up???
user i really wanna know what zak will make them do
f1gossip
20,329 likes
f1gossip Newly weds update! The two were seen this afternoon leaving Las Vegas with Zak Brown himself. Neither were seen wearing wedding rings, possible divorce?
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user well that was fun while it lasted
user damn they beat kim kardashians record of the shortest marriage
user at least theyre still dating😭
user they definitely got yelled at lmfaoo
user cant tell if zak is happy or angry that his daughter married norris considering how much he loves him
user oh hes def happy about it but not happy they posted it LOL
user good for him for getting an annulment. shes a mess
user and hes not? bye theyre both messy
landonorris 📍qatar
liked by carlossainz55, yourusername and 2,424,232 others
landonorris annulment? we're in our honeymoon
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user oh so theyre fr about this marriage😭
user does bro know theres a race on sunday
user they look so in love im honestly really happy for them
yourusername we beat the fraud marriage allegations💜
mclaren now thats its been approved by the boss, congratulations to the best papaya couple theres ever been🧡
user wow so zak approves! im shocked tbh
user i wish i couldve seen their reactions the morning after the wedding
yourusername ohhh we didnt remember any of it tbh but were happy now!
user LMFAO OMG....
user she finally got her ring!! and here you guys were thinking they got a divorce bc she didnt have one
danielricciardo never thought id see the day
yourusername me neither tbh
landonorris excuse me WHAT
landoupdates
50,242 likes
landoupdates Lando was questioned on his Vegas wedding in new interview.
"We decided not to get any annulment or anything and just keep this Vegas marriage as sort of like a promise for a real one in the future." 🧡
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user omg😭😭they are too cute
user not to be dramatic but i would honestly cried if they broke up
user no literally they mean everything to me
user "i really do think y/n is the one" DO YOU HEAR ME SOBBING
user he gets so smiley when y/n is brought up ughhh me and WHO
user and to think y/n has haters is crazyyy this man is so in love with her
user if oscar isnt the best man ill riot for him, he was there for the og wedding
user imagining them trying to convince zak to not get a divorce is the cutest but funniest thing ever
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more notes: has anyone seen anora?? it inspired this haha A FRAUD MARRIAGE!!!
#lando norris x reader#f1 x reader#lando norris#lando norris fanfic#lando norris imagine#lando norris smau#lando norris x y/n#lando norris x you#ln4#f1 fanfic
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— how to get a girl’s attention
luke castellan x fem!daughter of demeter!reader
warnings: near-drowning experience…
summary: as the daughter of demeter, you’re the first person that everyone turns to when injuries need to be tended too, questions need to be asked, and any type of advice is required, however what’s going to happen when you’re the one in need?
a/n: this one’s quite lengthy guys! i really just got derailed like ten times and love adding details and the ending is kind of basic but whatever; don’t mind me making up random camper names btw lol 👼👼
waking up to the sound of constant bickering was just a normal tuesday morning as your younger half-siblings were already at each other’s throats about some stupid thing. yesterday it was borrowing boots and the day before it was who had to take the trash out.
you groaned, wishing that you could still sleep in peace and quiet but your cabin clearly suggested otherwise. so you gradually got up and put on your little slippers, approaching the main fighters who continued to argue with each other.
“hey hey hey, what’s going on now.” you had to physically get between the two children, separating them with your arms.
“he slipped paint all over my skirt and now it’s ruined!” the young girl cried, holding up her stained skirt to prove it. you took the clothing in your hands and knelt down to face her.
“why don’t i go to the river later today and try to get the stain out myself. it seems washable to me, what do you think?”
with a slight frown, she nodded her head to comply. you were relieved to say the least before turning to the boy, “how about you apologize and come with me to the river after breakfast?”
the boy stayed silent with his arms crossed, trying to avoid your insisting stare. but intimidated enough, he looked to the floor and whispered a small “fine, i’m sorry” with a glare.
you smiled as the situation was deescalated and told the rest of the kids surrounding the pair to hurry and make their beds in order to head to breakfast.
holding hands with the now puffy-faced girl, you tried to tell her about all the fun activities she could do today to forget about the unfortunate morning incident.
before reaching mess hall, the child already had a a bright smile just thinking about the bracelet making and embroidery you promised for the later evening. pleased with your peace-making skills, you sat with the rest of your campers and half-siblings that you were in charge of.
as the eldest sibling and one of the camp counselors, you took on the responsibility of looking after the young ones and caring for almost everyone at camp.
thus, when most of the camp half-blood children had troubles or dilemmas of any sort, they would disregard their own counselors and go straight to you. your kindhearted, yet sociable personality rooted from your mother: demeter.
you were often found laying around in the fruit fields or by the river listening to the water flow through the ground and hit the rocks. like your mother, nature was where you felt at peace, especially with the lack of quiet in your own cabin.
but you still loved your fellow campers and half-siblings, except for one boy who would not leave you alone.
luke castellan.
he liked to push your buttons and see how far he could take you until you’d explode. of course, you always kept your calm until either you just left the conversation or it would be interrupted by a camper in need who was like a knight in shining armor.
it wasn’t that you didn’t like the guy. you liked everyone at camp, including mr. d for gods sake! but something about luke was different. you occasionally saw him with his campers or his friends, he would joke around but never act like he does with you.
when you least expect it, he sneaks up behind you and gets close enough to whisper something in your ear. it could be just a random comment or sentence started but in an alluring voice as if you were friends or even more.
he knows what he’s doing. the moment he finishes, you flinch and get flustered, cheeks heating up and instantly standing up to avoid making eye contact. as you walk away, luke only watches and smiles to himself.
he knows how much power he holds over you, as with just a few words he can make you nervous.
“okay so once everyone’s done, we’ll first go to the archery range and you’ll stay there with counselor clarisse while damien and i go to the river to get that nasty stain out.” you explained and first looked at the boy who begrudgingly agreed to helping you earlier and then winked at the little girl you promised to help.
“counselor clarisse…!” one of the boys exclaimed.
“oh no she’s the mean one!” “yeah, she’s a bully!” your campers all started to agree and mutter remarks about their fear in staying with clarisse.
you couldn’t help but chuckle at their scared little faces, “clarisse? oh gods no! clarisse is not scary, she loves you guys and she’ll take good care of you.”
the children stared at you in disbelief while chowing down their eggs and bacon. “why can’t we just come with you to the river?!” one of the girls begged and began to pout alongside the other ten kids beside her.
you sighed and pursed your lips into a thin line, trying to come up with a compromise but you couldn’t.
“please it’s only for a couple of hours and then i’ll be back for the rock wall and some capture the flag!” you persuaded, trying to lighten up the mood.
but the kids still looked dissatisfied, now poking their breakfast around with their utensils in objection.
“well—” before you could plead another case why clarisse is a perfectly reasonable and responsible counselor and guardian, you were cut off by the one and only.
“aw don’t worry guys, you should listen to your counselor. plus i’ll be there too so if counselor clarisse gets even just a little too scary, you can come and hang with awesome counselor luke!” a voice announced from behind you.
you nearly choked on your food, startled in the surprise voice cutting you off. but the campers were overjoyed to see their second favorite counselor appear. there were an overwhelming amount of comments from the once so silent children, mostly regarding “luke!” and “yay!”
you whipped your head around to face the boy, standing right behind you with nothing but a smug grin on his face. then he leaned in just as he always does and whispered a quick, “you’re welcome” and turned to leave just as fast as he came.
“can we please hang out with counselor luke instead of clarisse?!” all the campers plead with their hands put together and lower lip puckered. left with no other choice by that damn castellan again, you inhaled deeply and slightly nodded which was shortly followed by an array of cheers and excitement.
after dropping off all of the campers in the hands of luke, you put a hand on damien’s back and led him to the river. but before leaving, you had to make sure luke would actually clock in as a responsible counselor.
“so i can count on you to keep them safe for the next couple of hours?”
“wow you sound like you doubt me!” luke said and took a step back with his hands up in fake surrender.
“enough with the games, castellan. are you going to make sure they don’t kill each other and stay unharmed until i return?” you asked again, ignoring his previous comment.
luke tried to hold back his smile after you called him by his last name. most of the time, his sparring partners or other counselors would use his last name rather his first. however, when the way you let the ‘n’ slightly my drag after saying it sent chills throughout his entire body.
to hide his delight, he lightly scoffed and crossed his arms at your hesitation. “i assure you that i will protect them with my life. i mean i am the best swordsman at camp,” he added as the corners of his lips just couldn’t help themselves to lift a little.
you rolled your eyes at his self-confidence and how he kept complimenting himself. luke only did it to impress you though, something that hasn’t been very successful.
“okay well alissa has a nut allergy, georgie has a bee allergy, and please keep thomas and will away from the poison ivy. i do not want to spend another summer knee deep in tomato juice.”
luke could only watch and admire as you kept expressing your deep concern for all the kids. he loved how much you cared. but a few more seconds and you would be driving yourself crazy over all the possibilities of something going wrong.
that’s when luke stepped in and softly grabbed your right arm.
“hey, it’s fine. go do whatever you have to do and i’ll come running down to the river if anything goes wrong but i doubt it, i’m pretty responsible y’know.” he reassured and stared straight into your eyes, indicating his sincerity. his smile wasn’t conceited or to drive his ego but rather held a tender emotion.
you looked up into his hazel eyes and suddenly the worries stopped and your nerves were calmed, other than the ones beginning to stir in your stomach. but this was far from the regard about the kids.
this feeling was something else. something new.
“are we going to go already?” the young boy you almost forgot about, whined and rugged on your orange camp t-shirt.
snapping out of your trance and back to reality you answered, “o-oh yeah, i think counselor luke’s got it from here.”
with that you turned away from luke and immediately headed for the river alongside damien but the paint-stained skirt was farthest from your mind now. you tried to shake the new feelings and thoughts out of your body and replace them with your past ones of the kids.
until, “is that guy your boyfriend?”
you quickly looked down to the boy asking the question, with such seriousness in his eyes.
“counselor luke? gods no! i wouldn’t even call him a friend!” you answered swiftly, picking up your pace and hurrying damien in front of you.
“geez…i was just asking!”
as soon as you two got to the river, settling on a few rocks by the edge, you started rubbing the blue-stained skirt with the clear water. damien sat next to you, fiddling his thumbs and staring at the water’s constant movement.
“so are you going to tell me why you did this or not?” you began, keeping your eyes on the skirt.
“i just wanted to.”
“damien.” you urged and this time, you stared directly at him with your eyebrows raised.
he sighed in defeat and gave up on lying to you.
“okay…well i just didn’t know how else to get clara’s attention,” the boy admitted and refused to look at you.
his response warned your heart and prompted your to smile to yourself.
“so you did this, just to get clara’s attention?”
you held up the now drenched skirt and demanded damien to look at you. for a moment, he did and nodded quickly before instantly going back to staring at the rock he was sitting on.
you stifled your laughter at how adorable the young boy you were with was being.
“damien…there are a lot of different and more efficient ways to get clara’s attention. may a suggest one that doesn’t destroy her belongings and ends up with her being angry?” you insisted and squeezed the excess water out of the skirt.
he looked up and nodded again but this time he continued.
“what should i do?”
“why don’t you make her a bracelet when we go back and sincerely apologize.” you suggested while laying out the wet skirt on the rock to dry.
he smiled at your suggestion as you went to sit closer by him. before speaking again, he pulled out a small daisy from his pant pocket and presented it to you.
your eyes focused on the blooming flower that lost a few of its petals due to being stuck in the boy’s pocket for a while now. but the remaining petals still standing were enough to maintain the flower’s beauty.
“when did you become such a gentlemen?” you nudged his shoulder and took the flower from his hands.
“oh, i’ve been giving him some lessons.”
alarmed, you turned to see the familiar face that had been surprising you all day.
“what are you doing here?! how about the kids—who’s watching them?!” you immediately stood up and marched towards the too calm figure standing amongst the trees. but he caught you with both arms, preventing you with ease.
“woah woah, take a breather, they’re with clarisse.” he said and stopped you before you ran back to the mess hall.
reading your expression, luke could tell you were not convinced nor pleased so he had to fix his answer.
“—and annabeth and chris.”
with that you stopped fighting against his grasp and stepped back, finally exhaling.
“you haven’t answered my first question.”
“oh! i just uh wanted to um come and tell you that they’re asking for damien back at camp. they were practically begging me to come over here and get him!”
you narrowed your eyes after he finished, easily indicating the lie.
“okay…you can go damien but remember what i said,” you smiled and patted his shoulder before sending him off back to camp.
the young boy ran off without a care and ready to make that bracelet with a formal apology. luke stood there, quite surprised that his lie that chris helped him think of in fact worked.
“soooo do you need help with whatever that is?” luke pointed at the skirt laid out on the rock.
“no.” you shortly responded and walked back to your rock but luke followed like a lost puppy.
“are you sure? i mean as head counselor for cabin 11, i can cook up a mean batch of laundry,” he insisted and trailed behind you.
unbeknownst to him, you rolled your eyes and cringed at his wording.
“your words don’t even make sense.”
caught in a lie, luke decided actions spoke louder than words and walked past you to the skirt. you furrowed your eyebrows in confusion as he picked it up and crouched down near the water before dunking it back into the water.
shocked and a little annoyed, you hurriedly ran to him.
“what the hell are you doing?! i just washed that! i’m waiting for it to dry dumbass!”
“oh she curses!” he exclaimed, finally getting a real response from you.
you reached for it until luke raised it a little higher, just out of your reach. using his height as an advantage, he held out the clothing as far as he could and to the river.
fed up and exhausted, you went on your tippy-toes and lunged for the skirt. swiftly, luke pulled it close to his body just as you reached leading you to accidentally lean too far.
with a splash, you fell straight into the freezing cold water, unknown to how deep the river was. luke’s eyes widened, he thought you falling in would be funny but once you hadn’t resurfaced within a few seconds he became worried.
without a second thought, he dropped the skirt, pulled off his camp shirt, and dove into the biting waves. as soon as he saw your bright orange t-shirt in contrast to the clear water, he put his arm around your waist and swim towards the surface.
pulling you out to the rocks and laying your body on the ground, he waited for you to gain consciousness. luckily, you started to gasp for air and spit out gulps of water as you sat up.
luke sighed in relief at once. you wiped your face of water and blinked repeatedly until your sight returned to normal. then your eyes were fixated on something else, rather someone. his bare chest stood directly in front of your face, it wasn’t like you were trying to stare!
“i’m sorry, y/n. I’m so sorry, i didn’t mean to do that and i’m really sorry.” luke recited.
“i-it’s okay.” you stuttered, the cold water chilling your body.
“here take off the wet one and take mine.”
luke grabbed his discarded camp shirt and handed it to you. if you weren’t on the verge of frostbite you would’ve refused, but without another word you agreed and luke turned to face the trees as you pulled the wet shirt over your head and put on luke’s.
“thanks. for saving me and the shirt.”
luke turned back to face you and smiled, “i mean i was the one to make you fall into the water in the first place, it’s the least i can do.”
“aren’t you cold?” you signaled to his bare chest.
“no, i’m okay don’t worry. but your jeans are still wet so let’s head back to camp.” he reassured and helped you get up.
you nodded and let him take the lead. with your wet shirt and skirt in one hand and the other grabbing onto luke’s arm, you two finally made it back to camp. before dropping you off at your cabin, you had to ask.
“why did you come to the river anyway?”
luke awkwardly put his hand on the back of his neck and looked away.
“oh. i just uh wanted to spend time with you.” he admitted, ultimately facing you.
you stopped attending to your dripping pants and looked up at him. he had a genuine smile, now with both hands shoved into his pockets.
how was it that you had never noticed the golden flecks in his deep brown eyes? or the way the orange hues of the sunset highlighted the amber shade his eyes would turn?
“y’know, there are a lot of other ways to get my attention in the first place, that doesn’t involve us falling into freezing cold water.”
luke laughed at your comment which eased the awkward air.
“i had this almost exact same conversation with a little boy of about seven years, and gave him some valuable advice.”
“what was the advice..?” he carefully asked.
“to make her a bracelet and apologize, one of…you’ve already done profusely.” you raised your eyebrow to imply his previous attempt in apologizing nonstop.
“ah, a bracelet you say, okay got it,” luke said and nodded his head.
with that, he bid you a good day and you asked to meet him later at the campfire to return his shirt.
“alright you two sit there, i don’t want to see anymore fighting over the dinosaurs, you can sit here with him, and you three over there—” guiding the campers for the campfire that was just about to begin, you made your way to an empty bench.
smiling to yourself, you watched as your campers finally calmed down and enjoyed the music, giving up on fighting and arguing with one another. someone jumped over the bench and leaned back to sit right next to you, and you had a feeling who it may be.
“luke?”
“yes ma’am.” he replied with a tilt towards you and two fingers from his head.
the campfire lit up his face and highlighted his sharp features that you had somehow missed until this moment. his charming smile urging his dimples alongside his dark curls freshly washed with a new scented shampoo was enough to make you realize you were hooked. damn.
“oh i have a little something for you, give me your arm and close your eyes,” he spoke up and put his hand in his pocket.
raised eyebrow, you reluctantly closed your eyes and gave him your right arm. suddenly in fear of some bug or scary animal on your hand, you slowly retracted it back to yourself until he gently got a hold of it.
he pulled your arm towards him slightly and slipped something on around your wrist. waiting for his approval, you sat questioning what the mystery item could be.
“okay, open.” luke did a little ‘ta-da’ motion once you flickered your eyes open, adjusting to the dark yet orangish lit surrounding.
you looked down at the intricate, handsome bracelet that appeared on your wrist. it was similar to the camp necklaces but the beads were translucent with flowers imbedded into them. except for one bead that was painted a heavenly green, your favorite color.
astonished and at a loss for words, you observed the bracelet, moving around the small beads on the string.
“i’m sorry.”
snapping out of your trance, you instantly stared up at luke after his words in confusion.
“what?”
“you said earlier, ‘there are a lot of other ways to spend time with you that don’t involve us falling into freezing cold water, for starters make a bracelet and apologize.’” he repeated your words from back by your cabin. he remembered.
“so you made me a bracelet and apologize just like i said?” double-checking, you glanced once at the bracelet and back to the dashing boy who looked as if he had stars in his eyes, waiting for your reaction.
“not only for you, i also helped damien make one for that girl he’s got a crush on,” he continued and looked over to the little boy doing the exact same hold-out-your-arm-and-close-your-eyes trick on the girl sobbing about her stained skirt earlier.
she opened her eyes to a freshly washed skirt and matching bracelet, along with a smiling boy who was apologizing and waiting for her reaction. she leapt into his arms with a bunch of ‘thank yous.’ the boy then briefly peered at luke who proceeded to wink and give an approving nod.
happily surprised, you sat gaping at the boy you thought was so infuriating just a couple of hours before. luke knew exactly what he was doing. he knew how much you cared for the campers and your half-siblings, how you would always chose their safety and happiness at the expense of your very own.
it was one of the traits he admired the most about you. even when in a bad mood or not feeling your best, you would put on a brave face and make sure to put their needs in front of you own.
he witnessed it first-hand last week when your campers wanted to go rock climbing but there were dozens of poison ivy already there. thus, to not disappoint the kids, you stayed up all night removing the dangerous plant and relocating them to another area deep in the forest for them to grow.
even with your plant manipulation abilities, with the large amount of the poisonous plant, it took you quite a while. afterwards, you went as far to replace them with lovely daisies you summoned from the gardens in front of your cabin.
during the move from the rock climbing course to the forest, luke had spotted you while some late-night sword practicing because he couldn’t sleep due to apollo cabin next door.
he debated approaching you and settled on only admiring you from afar after you almost finished anyway. he didn’t want to disturb you or aggravate you further than you already were. but leaving you here in the forest during midnight would be wrong.
what if a monster were to come? how were you to defend yourself if you were distracted! therefore, it was just common sense that luke had to keep watch, i mean he even had his sword with him after all.
but once the sun peeped from the tall mountains, he came to a realization that he had just sat and watched you for more than a couple hours. so in order to not get caught, he ran off back to his cabin before anyone would wake up.
only a little after luke headed to bed, morning arrived and you were the first one to break the happy news to your campers that today would be the day for rock climbing. greatly proud and feeling accomplished, you even invited other cabins to join and have a spin at it. including luke’s.
now he was the one to show you how much he cared for the campers as well, focusing on a feature you had great respects for. your shocked expression softened and now leapt into his arms.
“thank you, castellan. really.”
blood rushed to his cheeks and he tried to hide his excitement, but you felt his genuine smile on your shoulder. before pulling away, he stopped by your ear and whispered.
“do i have permission to kiss you, counselor?”
you could’ve giggled at his words and how close his lips were to your ear. without wasting another breath, you pulled his face closer to you and put your lips on his.
feeling the warmth of his breath, you could taste the sweet taste of strawberries he must’ve eaten earlier. only centimeters away, your bodies were attracted to each other almost pressing. the kiss wasn’t long but not short either, somewhat leaving a lasting impression on the other.
yet again you felt a small grin of his lips during the kiss, making you pull away for air. but your eyes were still glued to his, moments away from repeating the act but you both realized where you were and how irresponsible it would look as counselors. so instead he grabbed your hand, now giving you the absolute cutest puppy dog eyes before asking.
“do i have your attention now?”
#luke castellan x y/n#luke castellan x you#luke castellan x reader#luke castellan#pjo x reader#pjo tv show#pjo series#percy jackson#lc#castellan
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