#and i think thats why i never really rewatch stranger things

[love-byers]

mike's weird language when he talks about el and their relationship

part of the equation of stranger things relationships is building the relationship through emotional connection, not physical intimacy and outright saying how you feel. it's a trope in st that the couples refuse to admit their feelings for some time before getting together. "we're just friends", "she's not my girlfriend" etc etc. the denial is super endearing. and even when the couples are finally together, this doesn't change. they're literally just the same duo same friends, but they kiss sometimes. they barely even acknowledge that they're together. it's a great trope in my opinion.

so a couple years ago i was rewatching st and made a list of everytime mike said something weird. meaning, every time mike did not adhere to this formula and stood out from the rest of the couples. i made a tiktok about it too so im basically quoting that in this post. something i stressed in that video was that because we have the other couples as source material, clearly the writers are capable of not doing this. they are capable of writing a good serious relationship, but they're choosing not to with mlvn. so keep in mind, the other couples (besides maybe stancy) do not do this and mike is supposedly, according to his own words, is madly and deeply in love with her throughout all of this and knows it.

Season 3

"Romantic time with my girlfriend."

i'll cut this one some slack, it's just that if you were truly madly in love it would be more like "I'm spending time with el". but thats all he views it as, romantic time with his girlfriend. going to his girlfriends house to make out with her. romantic time with his girlfriend. not bonding with the person he loves.

"Did you think we were never gonna get girlfriends?"

mike is hyperfocused on the word girlfriend. she's not el, the person he loves, she's his girlfriend. he doesn't say "did you think we were never gonna fall in love?" and look i get he's only like 14 here but it's the fact that he later claims he was in love with her the entire time and knew it. he literally claims it was love at first sight.

get girlfriends. he got a girlfriend. he didn't fall in love.

"It's not my fault you don't like girls!"

again the hyperfixation on girls, get a girlfriend, liking girls. mike, why are you more focused on the fact that el is a girl and your girlfriend than the fact that she's el?

"You're the most important thing to me in the world."

finn's delivery of this is so.....

and the fact that el just stares at him blankly afterwards, like she did not buy that lmao

Season 4

"That's because she's my girlfriend, Will!"

it's not "that's because i love her and want to talk to her" or something like that, it's "thats because she's my girlfriend and that's what you're supposed to do when you have a girlfriend" not "because she's el and i love her". that plays into mike's whole charade in lenora, he's just doing things he thinks he's supposed to do when you have a girlfriend.

"You're a superhero!"

that has nothing to do with who el is as a person, especially at that moment because at that time, el didn't have her powers. at the time, everyone believed they were gone, she wouldn't be saving the world anymore. but mike is still saying how incredible she is because she's a superhero.

i hate dr brenner so fucking much, but he did say something i really agree with. el kept going back to the concept monsters and heros, and he says those are things of myth and fairytale. not everything is black and white. this is real life, not a made up story with clear good and evil. and ultimately that helps her accept what happened with 001. he was 100% right there.

then here comes mike talking about monsters and superheros again like WRAP IT UP YA'LL ARE TOO GROWN FOR THIS

"You're the most incredible person in the world!"

again, he says that, but doesn't say why. he just expects her to believe him. it's such a broad statement and doesn't connect to anything about el and her personality/interests/ideas.

"Maybe I should've said something, and if I would've said that thing, maybe she'd want me there with her, wherever she is."

he wishes he'd just said it so she'd be satisfied and want him there and he'd know she's okay, he doesn't wish he'd said it so el would know in her heart that he loves her. "i love you" to mike isn't a geniune confession of his feelings, it's a thing. it's a thing that you say. it's something he thinks he has to say because that's what couples do and it's what el wants. if you fell in love with someone at first sight you do not refer to an expression of your love for them as 'that thing'.

"Maybe I was worrying to much about el. . ."

i really don't know what he meant by this. if she is the most important thing to him in the whole world and is deeply in love with her, why in the mother FUCK would he be apologizing TO WILL for worrying too much about her. there wouldn't be too much worrying when you love someone that much.

"You can fly, you can move mountains I believe that."

she literally can't.

"I love you for exactly who you are. You're my superhero."

the first time i saw this i literally thought "oh thats not..."

because it's.....not. one or the other would've been....fine i guess. but the first preceding the other is just not it. i love you for exactly who you are, and that is my superhero. is that all she is to you, mike? el expresses constant worry of being a monster, a bad person. she's afraid that she's a monster with or without her powers. but dr owens said "I'm willing to bet you're one of the good ones." fucking OWENS said something more reassuring than her boyfriend and supposed love of her life, mike wheeler.

THATS NOT ROMANTIC.

[mins-fins]

new years day !

"what do you know about love?" "it can bruise, like a punch.."

synopsis: it's only during the new year that huang renjun learns what love is, and loves comes in the form of a charming, margarita indulging, poetry obsessed man, you. after the clock strikes midnight, you take the once love skeptical man on a journey of discovering feelings, full of polaroids, bottle cleaning, and smudged lipstick. the only real question is, what do you do end up as when new years day is over? is this all going to come to nothing in the end?

pairing: huang renjun x male!reader

genre: modern au, not a uni au they've already graduated from uni 😭, strangers to lovers, they have a fling kinda, new years day..literally, this fic takes place during new years eve and new years day, fluff, light light angst, FAST ASS BURN!!

warnings: swearing, explicit language, sexual jokes, mentions of hookups, implications of sex but no smut, mentions of drinking, mentions of toxic workplace environments, things going from 1 to 100 so soon

word count: 12.6k

notes: one of the strangest pieces of writing i have ever completed.. let me get one thing straight, i 💗 renjun, i miss him and i hope hes doing well and taking care of himself :( this fic took the shortest time to write compared to like orbit of yours or all flights are delayed, literally completed this in less than a week.. thats a new isa record i think 😣 anyway!! i decided to do smth different with this fic, instead of just writing a bunch of scenes the singular scenes alone are all about a good few thousand words long, so it might seem short in terms of scenes cause there are really only eight, but each scene is super long so you'll be praying for it to end!!! is this probably super unrealistic? yes, but it's huang renjun so idc, enjoy :)

AT 11:34 PM, RENJUN FOUND HIMSELF IN a spot he didn't want to be. after the many failures he's had on all the previous years on new years eves, he was ready to stay home, with a heavy sweater on, pop a bag of popcorn, and sit down on his couch to rewatch the last season of bridgerton once again. he did not want to go out at all, he was not planning to go out at all. no drinking, no bar dates, no stupid flings that end up with the guy not calling you in the end, just him, alone, at his place, eating a shitload of popcorn and crying as much as possible even if there was nothing to cry about it.

going out and sitting at a bar was not on the list of things he wanted to do this new years eve. it reminds him too much of past flings which didn't really end well.. god all of those guys who acted like they were sooooo into him just to drop him the moment he wanted anything other than sex.

he wants to snap all of their necks right now.

renjun was not preparing to go out today, yeah it's new years eve and shit but he doesn't care, he doesn't want to drink.

but lee donghyuck, fucking lee donghyuck just had to stick his head in and beg for renjun to go out with the rest of them. his coworkers don't really annoy him, he just wishes they would stop nagging him. all huang renjun wanted to do on his new years eve was sit down and spend his day at home, watching stupid shows about love, love he knows he'll never get to experience because all the men he attracts are assholes who'd rather die before committing to anything.

and yeah, maybe renjun is being harsh, but the world has been so harsh on him already, he deserves to be harsh, the world deserves it!

so when donghyuck showed up to his place with the offering of him to go out with the rest of the group, he was quick to decline because he knew it was going to end up the same way it always did. he'd wake up having had yet another drunken one night stand and the guy would become nothing but a memory until the next new year when he did it all over again.

"but why not!? drinking can help you forget about that asshole jin—"

"don't mention his name" renjun scolded earlier that day, a steady glare in his eyes pointed at the younger. he heard the sigh of defeat escape donghyuck's lips, but he doesn't care, he turns back around to finish washing the dishes he'd left in the sink before. "and no, drinking isn't going to solve that problem, it'll make it worse".

"but you can't be alone on new year's eve!"

renjun turned back to the yelling lee, a deadpanned expression on his face. "yes i can, i literally will".

"ugh! you're so boring! jeno help me plead my case here!"

renjun just rolled his eyes, trying his best to ignore the insult from his 'friend'. it wasn't often that they decided to crowd up in his place, but because of the new year coming up, and his lack of interest in doing their little new years tradition, they all banded together to try and convince him to go out and drink.

"maybe going out will help you forget about your mess of an ex boyfriend".

"it never helps".

"maybe you should stop trying to get into some guys pants every time, then" jaemin judged out loud, and the older snapped his head towards him to glare once again, offended by that idea. "what? don't look at me like that, it's true!"

"it is not! you're acting like i'm some sort of sex obsessed freak!"

"well only on new years—"

"i have a knife here, do you want me to kill your right now?" he threatened, pointing the knife littered with soap at donghyuck, who shrieked and quickly hid behind jeno. he scoffed, dropping the sharp blade into the sink and drying off his hands. "i'm not going out drinking with you guys".

"so what? you're just going to sit around and do nothing?"

"that is the plan" the huang clicked his tongue, and a groan sounded from the rest of his same aged friends, which just resulted in him snickering at their misery. "whine all you want, i don't care".

"come on, renjunie!" jaemin quickly stood up and wrapped his arms around the older, a pout on his face as he stared at him, practically pleading through his eyes. "please! we won't do anything stupid we swear!" he cupped the older's face, squishing his cheeks between his hands.

renjun simply allowed for the action to happen, because jaemin would've continued to whine like a baby if he tried to push him anyway. "it's just today! you don't even have to drink, you can just sit around with us! pleaaseeeeeee?"

"okay okay get off" renjun pushed the younger away from him, lightly caressing his jaw as he tried to recover from his vice grip. "fine, i'll go out if it stops you all from being so annoying".

the gasp from donghyuck and his subsequent yell in victory made renjun roll his eyes again as he quickly dismissed his friends with a waving hand. "stop yelling or i'll change my mind".

jeno quickly nudged donghyuck, who stopped his yelling and just gave a blinding smile. "we'll see you later then, renjunie! chenle will text you the address!"

renjun was not looking forward to this outing they had planned.

so here he is, december 31st, 11:34 pm, sat at a bar as his friends all get up to their own things. when he first did arrive, he thought he'd only be there for a good hour and a half before leaving, but no, it's almost twenty minutes away from midnight and he's still here, sat at the bar, without a drink anywhere near him.

at this point, he's about to order a drink just to make himself less bored.

"excuse me?" he calls out, catching the attention of the bartender in front of him. he gives a small smile, lightly straightening up his seat and sighing. "hi, can i have a kir royale?"

the bartender raises an eyebrow, blinking at the stranger in front of him. "just that?"

"just that" he confirms, smiling when he earns a nod from the stranger before him. "thank you".

"kir royale? you have questionable taste.."

renjun startles when he hears the sound of an unfamiliar voice, while he would've been annoyed if it was one of his friends who decided to keep him company after abandoning him to go on and do stuff with other people, he probably would've preferred them instead of.. well, you.

and that's not in an insulting way, you just make everything so complicated for renjun.

"questionable?" renjun raises an eyebrow, just a little irritated by the words from this stranger who had seemingly come out of nowhere. you blink, snickering lightly as you settle down beside him, you already have a drink of your own, but renjun can't currently focus on that. "what is that supposed to mean?"

"just didn't think it would be someone's first choice.." you mutter, fingers toying with the glass of your cup. "but i can't judge anyone for they're drink choices, i can't really judge anyone for anything" you giggle to yourself, and renjun catches your smile, a smile he decides is pretty.

renjun allows for a small laugh to escape his own lips, probably the first time he ever laughed that night, it wouldn't be the last time, though. "i just want something to drink, at this point, it doesn't matter if it tastes good or bad anymore, my year has been insanely shitty".

"oh? trying to erase the mistakes of the previous twelve months with drinking?"

"you could say that" renjun replies, smiling softly at you then turning back to the bartender in front of him, he let out another small 'thank you' and slid the drink over to him smoothly. "i just don't want to drink too much" he says, beginning to dig through his wallet to pay for this little drink.

"scared of the hangover?"

"not the hangover, just scared of saying something i'll regret" he chuckles again, finally finding his card and paying for his drink. he again smiles at the bartender and places his card back in his wallet, merely glancing at you.

"hm" you respond, taking another sip of your drink. "that's understandable".

"yeah.." he mumbles, immediately looking away from you as he feels his face redden stupidly quickly. what is he even blushing for? he just met you, there is no reason you should be flustering him, you didn't even do anything. "what's your name?" he's quick to ask, and you hum again as a response, picking at your nails.

"y/n".

renjun finally looks at you as you say your name, you aren't looking at him, checking the time on your phone. he looks you up down, examining everything about you, your clothes are nice, the jewelry your wearing is nice, your hair is nice, everything about you is nice.

your lips are especially nice, he would describe them as beautiful even.

but renjun should not be staring at your lips, or even be thinking about them, he didn't agree to go out just to hook up with another guy, he is not going to do that, it'd be idiotic for him to. yeah you're pretty, very pretty, but renjun isn't going to allow for this conversation to escalate into something.. else, he's not going to surrender his pride because of a pretty guy he met at a bar.

"and you?"

renjun's face only burns more when he realizes he's been silent all this time, just marking each of your features in his head, he probably looked so stupid, just staring at you speechless. "oh! me? me! yeah uh— renjun".

"renjun" you snap your fingers as you say his name. "ren-jun, pretty, i like it".

"pretty?"

"yeah, a pretty name for a pretty guy".

renjun immediately wants to rebut with a snappy response, but he gets much more flustered than he wants to admit, because he instead begins trying to sputter out a response with his face now reddening excessively. "i— flirting with me on new year's eve, really?"

"not flirting, just telling you what i observed".

"so you think i'm pretty?"

"i'd be lying if i said i didn't" you reply smoothly, a grin tugging at your lips as you take another sip of your almost finished drink. "is it such a surprise that i think so?"

"well.. no, but it's just, i don't know, i don't want to do something i'll regret".

you raise an eyebrow, clearly puzzled by the seemingly cryptic words. "what does that mean?"

renjun lets out a small sigh, he can't believe he's going to say this, especially to you, a pretty stranger he met at a bar on new year's eve. "i can't start a new thing with another guy on new year's eve because it never ends up well, i should've learned my lesson by now".

you blink, staring at renjun for much longer than he thinks he could ever handle. you're silent for a while, processing his words and tilting your head to the side to get a better look at him. "ah, so all of your new year's eve hookups end terribly?"

"not just my new year's eve hookups, all of my attempts at love have ended terribly, can't believe love is advertised as something so desirable but every single time i try, i fail!"

"that has to do more with the people you entangle yourself with, not love itself".

"love is stupid" renjun's teeth drag against each other as he says those words, harsh words, yes, but he deserves to be harsh, the world deserves his wrath because the only thing that's ever been given to him is heartbreak after heartbreak after heartbreak! you let out a small chuckle at the sight of his gritted teeth, the words amuse you.

"is it? or have you just had horrible experiences with it?"

"okay mr love expert" renjun is quick to rebut, and the statement is enough to get yet another laugh out of you. "what do you know about love?"

you pause for a moment as you think about the words he suddenly spits, the question makes you smile, that pretty smile that renjun loves so much, he wants to punch you in the face for being so pretty.

"it can bruise, like a punch.." your quick to answer, fiddling with your shirt collar. "but it's not all bad, love can be beautiful, entrancing, when you do find someone who really loves you, it can be a magical experience, a whirlwind of joy you never knew you could feel for another human being".

"are you into all that poetic bullshit?"

"i guess you could say that".

renjun giggles, a small shake of his head accompanying the sound which escapes his lips. he won't lie, you're very funny, hilarious even. at least he has you as company on this terrible new year's eve, even with your stupid talks of love, he enjoys having you around. "are you going to try to redeem love for me?"

the words are much more flirtatious than he intends for them to be, but it seems you don't notice, because you just smile at his words. "i can't change something you don't want me to, i can only inform you on how i feel about the topic".

renjun opens his mouth to say something in return, but he doesn't really know how to respond to that. god, how have you managed to leave him so speechless even though this is your first encounter? he's about to collapse onto the floor with how surprised he is.

but somehow, renjun stands his ground, literally. "your pretty well spoken for someone so.. you".

"someone so me?"

"yeah" renjun clears his throat. "you remind me of a friend of mine, you probably have so many people falling at your feet without you even having to do anything".

"you make me sound much more interesting than i actually am" you finally finish your drink, your cheeks are dusted red, and you fiddle with the glass in your hands, tracing each of the cuts carved into it. renjun has no idea why he focuses on your hands, but he does, he intently watches as your fingers move skillfully, and his ears begin burning at just the fact that he's staring at your fingers.

oh you've hit a whole new low, huang renjun.

"so you're not some cool playboy who has seven boyfriends?"

"do i strike you as a whore?"

that made renjun laugh even harder, and he had to cover his mouth with his hand. "you're so.. abrupt".

"i like to think that's one of my best traits" you respond, clasping your hands together before focusing your full attention on renjun, attention which immediately makes all of renjun's senses heighten. "so, any interesting new year's resolutions?"

renjun groans at the question, playfully rolling his eyes. "i have to stop making mistakes when it comes to the men i choose to love".

you hum, finger beginning to circle around a small spot atop the counter. renjun has to use pretty much all of his inner power to prevent his eyes from falling down towards your fingers and staring at them. he really has no idea why he's resisting these very needy urges, he doesn't want to seem easy to you, he doesn't want to seem easy to anyone.

but there's something about you, something that makes him want to stay instead of leave, this is something different, not like the other encounters he's had with cute guys at bars on new year's eve. "and what about you? what is your resolution?"

"probably to quit my shitty job".

renjun snorts, finding the statement amusing. "that's a good one, much better than mine".

"i would disagree, yours seems full of much more ambition".

"well i do pride myself on my ambitious spirit" renjun hums, unabashedly checking you out right in front of you, maybe it's the one drink getting to his head, but he's no longer ashamed anymore, he's doing it in broad daylight. "i think you're pretty too".

renjun has no idea where those words came from, but they definitely have an impact, because a small red hue settles on your cheeks, and renjun smiles in victory, he flustered you, he's so proud of himself for that. "oh really? you think i'm pretty, renjun?"

you lean closer to him as you say those words, allowing for your breath to fan against his face, and getting a close up few of his striking features. your eyes cast down towards his lips, but you quickly look back up to make eye contact, not wanting to distract yourself.

renjun, on the other hand, finds himself frozen in place. you're close, you're so close, and renjun can see each of the pores on your face. he can't move, so he doesn't move, he allows for his eyes to drag around your face and mark each of your very features.

"yeah" he responds, voice frail and barely above a whisper. "arguably the prettiest guy i've ever met at a bar on new year's eve" his response gets a small smile out of you, and you click your tongue as you merely glance away.

"rich of you to say, you're probably the prettiest guy i've ever met point blank".

"don't try to one up me".

you raise an eyebrow, that annoying smile still on your lips. "i just did".

renjun just bites his bottom lip, he can't help but stare directly at yours.

he is unashamed.

AT 11:57 PM, RENJUN FOUND HIMSELF IN an unfamiliar spot, but a familiar situation. his hands tangled in your hair, your fingers caressing his waist under his shirt, nothing against your back but the steel of your sink and the feeling of his lips on yours, renjun found himself amused by his current circumstances. what did he say again earlier? right, he wasn't going out to end up in the same place he always did on new year's eve, but here is, history truly has a way of repeating itself. renjun doesn't care if he comes off as desperate, it felt horrible trying to contain himself out there, he can't believe he actually did end up surrendering his pride to you, the pretty guy he met at a bar.

well, that's not exactly it.

having the sudden need for air, you pull away, chuckling at the way renjun doesn't really move away from you, his fingers in your hair settle for a moment, and they begin gently running through it, as if he's trying to coax you into a slumber or something. "is this how you spend your new year's eve? making out with a guy in a bar bathroom?"

renjun scoffs, registering your red face, he wants to laugh, but his is probably not better off, so he stops himself. "did you want to make out outside?"

"i think you wanted to make out outside, did you think you were slick?"

renjun frowns, it's not a serious frown, it's a playful one, and shoves your shoulder lightly. "i should've never kissed you.."

"aww" you pout, over exaggerating your expression to amuse the man in front of you. it seems to work, because renjun snorts at the way you're looking at him. he simply tightens his hold in your hair and pulls you closer to press your lips against his once more, making you squeak lightly in surprise.

"you're so annoying.." he whispers against your lips, he wants to act on his hearts desire, but instead refrains from kissing you once again, though your lips do look tempting, he already did it enough in the span of a few minutes. "you're lucky your cute".

"thank you" you hum happily, a pretty grin tugging on your lips as you stare at him. "you're cuter, though".

that results in a tch from renjun. "corny".

"cornier".

renjun snickers, preparing a new rebuttal as he continues running his fingers through your hair. you decide you like the feeling, so you don't tell him to let go of your hair, just allow for his fingers to relax and cart through your it. "can't believe i ended up here with you.." he mutters under his breath, and you simply smile as you pretend you didn't hear that.

unconsciously, your fingers again disappear under his shirt to caress his waist. renjun settles into the touch, your full hand isn't exactly wrapped around his waist, but you still manage to cover most of it, even if what your doing is just feeling his skin with the touch of your cold fingers. "where else would you want to be, right now?"

"at home, in my bed, under a mountain of blankets".

you tilt your head, staring at him. you find it funny how casual everything between the two of you seems after having a nonstop make out session where he quite literally pressed you against the sink, his duality is simply admirable. "i can't say that doesn't seem completely alluring right now".

renjun lets a smile come to his face, but a whole new realization suddenly dawns on him. it is new year's eve, the countdown should be starting soon. "what time is it?" he asks you, words rushed and simply spat out in a moment of clear confusion.

you glance down at your watch, narrowing your eyes at the numbers presented on the miniature clock. "a minute till midnight, not sure about how many seconds are left though".

renjun opens his mouth to ask another question, but is quickly cut off by the sound of someone outside shouting about the ten second countdown to new year's day. he looks at you again, and a smile comes to your face. "guess we won't be counting down with the crowd".

you now fully wrap your arms around his waist, easily pulling him closer to you as you hear the crowd of people outside begin counting down. ten, nine, eight; "don't you find this fun, though? spending new year's with a pretty bar boy?"

then seven, then six, renjun can't really focus properly on anything. "eh, it could be better".

he drops his hand from your hair and starts down with his index finger, stopping at your shirt collar that he quickly begins to fiddle with. five; the numbers are practically burning into his head at this point.

you seem to notice him thinking, and you nudge him, squeezing his waist gently. "hey" you call out, a small whisper, you remove one of your hands from his waist to lift his chin with your index finger, making eye contact with you. "don't think so much, just be in the moment".

four, three, two.

renjun allows for a sigh to escape his lips, trying his best to push all of his anxieties away as he looks up at you. he, again, tilts his head and leans closer to you. just at the last shout of one, he barely whispers it, seemingly just a lingering breath on your lips. "happy new year".

and again, renjun initiates the kiss between you two. if anyone saw him right now, they'd think he was dying with how urgent he seemed. it was like he'd die if you didn't put your lips on his, kissing you like a man on death row. he kept himself pressed against you, as if the idea of not feeling every single part of you was unfathomable.

you weren't much better off, though not the one initiating the kiss, you slowly take over the control, transforming it into less of a heated moment and more of a soft one, nothing but a few press of the lips, less rushed and more thought out. your fingers continue to caress his waist, ignoring the growing butterflies in your stomach.

surely this can't be anything serious, this is just a random guy your making out with in a bar bathroom on new year's eve. why would it ever be serious?

you refrain yourself from thinking too much about it.

when renjun finally pulls away, catching his breath in the process, his eyes immediately look down onto the floor, avoiding eye contact with you like you would turn him into stone if he even looked you in the eye. "sorry, i.. i don't know why i did all that".

you chuckle lightly, just smiling at him. "it's fine, i mean— you do know how to handle things your passionate about".

renjun laughs at the joke, still not looking at you. you want to take his jaw in your hands and move him to look at you, to make eye contact with you, but you stop yourself from doing that, the last thing you want to do is make him uncomfortable because you want him to look at you. "happy new year, renjun".

the soft spoken statement makes renjun finally turn to look at you. he has no idea why, but his face heats up upon seeing the small smile painted on your features, your smile is very pretty, he can't stress that enough today.

he doesn't stop himself from moving up his hand and touching your cheek, beginning to caress your soft skin with his thumb. this is strangely intimate, much more intimate than he usually gets with guys he meets at bars on new year's eve, what's with you that's so different? what is it about you that has his stomach flipping in strange ways?

"happy new year, y/n" he finally answers, sharing the same soft smile with you that you shared with him. it's a strange moment, the air isn't thick, it's not suffocating you two, everything feels..just right.

his lipstick has probably gone to shit by now, all smudged and messed up, he can see the marks on your neck, marks that make his stomach squirm in ways he can't explain. he doesn't really know if he wants all of this to end right now, and as his eyes zero in on your lips again, he blurts one of the first things he can think of.

"i don't— i mean.. come home with me?"

the question makes you blink, and even renjun seems confused by the words. why did i ask that? why the fuck did i ask that? he's literally about to die from the second hand embarrassment he feels.

"are you sure you want that?"

"we don't have to do anything!" he immediately shouts defensively, face so red he might collapse from the excessive heat of his cheeks. "we could just talk and stuff, i don't know, i just want your company i guess.."

renjun doesn't look at you as he mutters those words, again way too embarrassed to look you in the eye. how did you even manage to get him like this? he doesn't think he's ever been this flustered by a guy he just met ever.

it's so embarrassing.

"well i can't disagree with such an offer, can i?"

renjun attempts his best unbothered scoff, but he is already so bothered by you, if his red face is anything to go by. "shut up before i change my mind".

and all you do is chuckle.

AT 12:10 AM, RENJUN FOUND HIMSELF ON a walk down the sidewalk with his hands laced together with yours. the streets are much more crowded on this day, and at this time, that's a rare sight. he can see all the people giggling, drunkenly making their way across the streets and down the sidewalks, friends helping other friends support themselves, girls walking while carrying their heels because their feet have begun to cramp, strangers giggling and going on with their lives. renjun allows for himself to observe everyone doing their own thing, stars in the sky shining brightly above him, but even with his focus on the other people around, his attention quickly floats back to you, and he notices that you're too lost in your own world of observation.

though he asked you to come home with him, renjun didn't really think the whole thing through, it was a weirdly impulsive decision that he would usually always overthink before making, but with you.. you just have this unsaid affect on renjun he can't explain, you have this ability to turn his brain into mush.

of course, he couldn't just go home with you without telling his friends he was going home. donghyuck was already passed out by that point, so renjun was spared from his teasing, but that didn't mean jaemin and chenle went easy on him, with their raising eyebrows and tormenting tones of voice.

you charmed those two immediately, impressing them by doing literally anything. they both exchanged enticed glances as they sent renjun a few frivolous looks, looks that he chose to respond with glares as he tried to ignore his quickly reddening face. jaemin made sure to take extra time shaking your hand (a handshake which renjun laser focused on), even squeezing it for extra measure.

so renjun was sort of right, you do easily have people falling at your feet.

renjun pretended to not notice the way you clearly enchanted the two, and he also pretended not to notice the snicker you let out as he quickly dragged you away from his friends, midway through one of his jaemin's pick up lines.

no he wasn't jealous, and even if he was, he was not going to admit that to anyone, not even to any of his friends (the little 'lucky' text he got from chenle was funny, though, he'd admit that).

"the stars are beautiful tonight".

renjun snaps out of his whirlwind of thoughts as he hears the small mutter from you. the two of you are still holding hands, when did you even begin holding hands? renjun has no idea, but for some reasons, it feels right, like your fingers slip together so perfectly, just your hand in his is the perfect feeling, like it was the missing piece of a puzzle.

you're staring up at the sky, eyes practically lit up in interest as you stared at the luminous balls of gas in the night sky. renjun lets out a small laugh at how engrossed you are in the stars shining in the sky, and you notice that small laugh, because you finally stop your stargazing to look over at renjun. "what's so funny?"

"you just look so into the stars" he replies, a small smile coming to his face as he looks into your eyes. "your fascination is admirable" he whispers, saying the words in a low voice like it's a secret he wants to keep only between you two.

you blink, staring at renjun as if you were in love with him or something, a look that makes him feel much more giddy than he'd like to admit. then, though you're clearly flustered, you clear your throat and try your best to not make your red face obvious. "really? i think my interest in stars is nerdy".

"nerdy?"

"that's what everyone else says".

renjun lets his face fall in just the slightest, the words upsetting him lightly. still, he doesn't say anything about it, instead answering something else you mentioned. "your interest in stars is cute, i like seeing people so passionate about things".

you raise an eyebrow, only focusing on one specific word in that sentence. "cute?"

"it was the first word to come to mind".

"hm" you swing your hands back and forth, scooting closer to renjun as you do so.

you're close, you're so close, renjun is unsure of how he's even able to continue breathing with the way your shoulders brush against each other, he squeezes your laced hands, trying to brush off any other thoughts he might be having at the moment. "is stargazing a hobby of yours?"

"it's only really a hobby i do on certain nights, nights when i know certain constellations can be soon, or a shooting star is happening".

"ah" renjun loves that response much more than he can express with words. "you always talk about your hobbies as if you're in love with them".

"well it's just how i get when i'm very into something, i can't really just express things normally when it comes to shit like that".

renjun lets out a laugh at the words, catching view of his tall apartment building and tightening his grip on your hand, making you squeak in surprise as he jolts you forward with a hard tug of your hand. you could easily overpower him, make his life harder by refusing to be dragged, but you allow him to drag you forward towards the doors of his building.

"jeez, don't yank my arm off, huang" you chastise playfully, using his surname to aggravate him, but he only shoots a small glare at you. "what's the rush?" you inquire, frowning lightly as his hand slips from yours, you settle beside him in the elevator, watching him as he presses the five button with his finger.

"there is no rush" he lies, a clear, bold faced lie. he does nothing but smile at you, anxiously swaying back and forth as he stares at the elevator going up one by one. "don't give me that look".

you chuckle at his sudden scolding. "what look?"

"the look where you start reading my inner most thoughts" renjun states, as if he was sure of the kind of look you were giving him. when he sees the puzzled look in your eyes, he sighs. "it's a look i've gotten from many of my friends, feels like you're seeing through my head and know what i'm thinking".

you smile at his explanation, finding the words to be humorous. "well you do think so expressively, i feel like i can hear your thoughts running".

"should i be worried about how you described that?"

"definitely not, what are you thinking so hard about?"

renjun pauses at the question, the dinging of the elevator at floor two, doors opening to welcome in two drunk college students, two drunk college students who press the floor eight button and move to a corner of the elevator to keep themselves wrapped in each other's arms. renjun blinks at the sight of them, unconsciously moving closer to you, bumping into you in the process.

you move your hand down to intertwine your fingers with his, an action that renjun questions, but doesn't rebel against. the students are much too interested in their own conversation to care about you two, so you nudge renjun, who finally looks back at you. "answer my question, what were you thinking so hard about?"

the volume of your voice is much lower, you probably don't want to disturb the also muttering students in the elevator, but it's also because you don't want to expose renjun's answer to these two strangers he probably doesn't want to share his thoughts with. "it's a secret" he responds with a small whisper, leaning closer to you as says those words, the words a whisper against your ear.

his sudden closeness is enough to fluster you.

seemingly glad that he caused your newly reddened face, renjun leans away from your ear and smiles happily, swinging your laced hands back and forth. if you think about it, the two of you kind of look like a couple, the thought is enough to amuse you, because you really just are strangers who enjoy kissing each other, you didn't even know each other two hours ago, and now he's bringing you home with him.

if this is the story you think it is, the ending seems pretty clear.

it seems that the time flies by, because you look up at the counting numbers and the elevator dings, floor five. you barely have time to react before renjun's grip on your hand tightens, and he drags you by your hand once again, this time out of the elevator and towards his unit.

you swear you hear those drunk college kids giggle at the sight of you two.

"this place is nice" you comment absentmindedly, reading off each of the numbers placed on each of the other doors. "better than anything i could afford on my own, what do you do for work?"

"i work for a graphic design company".

"what's your position? do you run the place or something?"

renjun snickers at your surprise, finally stopping the two of you in front of a door which reads the number 'fifteen'. he begins digging through his pocket for his house key, though acknowledging your question as he does so. "i'm just good at my job i guess.. pay has always been good for me".

after finding his key, renjun attempts to open the door, but he struggles a few times to put his key in the key slot, an annoyed groan escaping his lips as he turns his key over again.

you chuckle at his little battle, catching his scrunched nose and furrowed eyebrows. "need some help there?"

renjun sends you a quick glare. "haha, very funny" he says, looking back to his front door and finally, after what seemed like forever, he unlocked the door of his home, gesturing with his head for you to come in.

you blink at him, but as you watch him step forward, you also step forward, letting yourself into his space. you pause as you begin looking around the expanse of an area. it's a nice place, yeah it lives up to the pristine outside of the apartment building, save for a few empty bottles littering the floor. the place is cozy, the air in the room is comforting to you, it isn't thick or anything.

you feel comfortable here.

"you gonna stand there forever?"

you laugh at renjun's inquiry, continuing to look around his complex, picking up on the many art pieces pinned against the wall. "what else am i supposed to do?" you ask back, allowing for renjun's home decor to catch your attention, it's all strangely him, they all describe his personality so well.

"come with me".

"is that an order? or.." you get an answer to that question when you turn to renjun and he stares at you with that pointed look, so you know better than to question his words, and like a lost puppy, you follow behind him to his room.

renjun doesn't say anything more, just takes off his jacket and falls face first onto his bed. you sort of just stand there awkwardly, fidgeting with the zipper on your jacket. renjun turns over, eyes staring up at the ceiling, they then flick over to you, a soft look in them dedicated towards you.

you simply blink at him, chuckling at the display before you. renjun doesn't speak, just gestures you over with his index finger. when you step closer, you simply sigh and sit down on his soft mattress, you were about to fall back and go to sleep yourself, but you stop from doing such things. "what's up with you?"

renjun sighs, and that sigh quickly forms into a soft whine. "i'm so tired y/n" his head rests against his pillow, and his eyes begin drooping shut slowly.

you smile, he's so cute. "then sleep".

renjun seems to want to comply with that, but he thinks about it before answering. "are you still gonna be here when i wake up?"

the question baffles you, it's a question asked with pure exhaustion in his voice, a look in his eye that's so tempting you just want to dive in to kiss him at this very moment, but you stop yourself from acting on such desires, trying to seem not as desperate as you felt. you shrug at the question, which makes renjun frown. "it depends on if you want me here when you wake up".

"if i wake up in the next few hours and i don't see you right there beside me, we are going to have serious issues y/n".

his demanding tone and the serious look in his eye is enough to get another chuckle out of you. renjun then makes himself comfortable, patting the pillow beside his. "lay down with me".

"you're so bossy" you laugh, and renjun is too annoyed to punch your shoulder, so he lets out a tiny irritated grunt in response. you let your jacket fall to the floor, laying your head down onto the soft material of the pillow, almost falling asleep right then and there.

renjun reaches out and begins caressing your cheek with his thumb. again, it's strangely intimate, a satisfying touch against your face which begins to relax you. renjun has no idea why he keeps doing this, but you would tell him if you felt uncomfortable, and you aren't, you like the feeling if you say so yourself.

but just as you were about to doze off, getting coaxed to sleep by the smooth ministrations on your cheek, renjun asks one last question.

"you sure you're still gonna be here when i wake up?"

through your sleepy haze, you nod and let out a tiny chuckle, eyes closing against your own will. "i will, promise".

"promise.." renjun mimics, it's not a question, not a statement or anything, he just whispers the word into the air, continuing to stroke your cheek as he stares at you, slowly slipping into a deep sleep.

sleep quickly takes him away as well, but not before he smiles at the sight of your tired face.

AT 8:03 AM, RENJUN FOUND HIMSELF IN the same spot he fell asleep, which he very much expected. he only rubs his eyes in the slightest, they take a little too long to adjust to the light permeating through the window, though only a small crack of sunlight, it's enough to make his eyes close once again, taking a few more eye openings for them to adjust to the sight of his surrounding room. when they finally to adjust, he's quick to glance over at the spot beside him, and he smiles as he sees you in the same place he left you. you had kept your promise of still being there when he woke up, and though renjun would probably call himself stupid for this on most days, he stops and stares. he keeps his head laid back comfortably onto his pillow and watches you sleep.

that sounds pretty creepy in hindsight, but at the current moment, renjun feels like he has to stare at your snoring figure. your face is half turned into the pillow your laying on, your cheeks dusted red as they press into the soft fabric of the pillow. he giggles softly as he watches your chest rise and fall, the only sound he can hear being the inhales your taking in and the exhales your letting out.

ah, so you're not a snorer, renjun finds the fact to be surprising. it's not that he expected you to have monster snoring habits or something, but he expected at least some sort of loud noises from you while you slept, but no, you sleep so gently.

you sleep like a baby, and you also look like one in the dimly lit room. sun shining on your face, highlighting your features, your pink lips parted as you let out short breaths, your cheeks a rosy red, he can't help but smile at the sight of you sleeping in front of him.

you look so cute, so serene, renjun wants to pinch your cheek and never let go.

but then he's struck with the realization that he has to wake up, a realization that makes him frown as he lets out a small groan.

the sound emanating from his lips seems to be loud enough that you startle out of your slumber, shifting slightly against the mattress. renjun almost jumps back in surprise when he sees you shift again, rubbing your eyes and letting out a small groan. renjun doesn't take his eyes off you, though, just watches you stretch awake, then close your eyes once again.

after what seems like forever, your eyes open and you blink a few times at the male in front of you. when you stop blinking, you smile at him, as he makes no effort to even try to look away from you. "hi" you greet, taking a deep breath as you sigh against the material of the pillow under your head.

"hi" renjun greets back, unable to resist his giggle as he stares at your tired morning face.

you try your best to tilt your head, humming at his greeting. "were you watching me?" you ask immediately, trying your best to tease him even with the rasp of your voice.

"yeah".

"you creep".

renjun does nothing to confirm or deny the claim, simply hums and gently flicks your forehead, making you let out a wince of pain, a wince he's sure you're faking. "you sleep like a baby".

you furrow your eyebrows, seemingly confused by that statement. "what is that supposed to mean?"

"you sleep so peacefully, like you have no responsibilities in life".

the statement makes you snicker, and you turn more into the pillow to hide your quickly reddening face. renjun giggles again, fulfilling his desire of pinching your cheek, an act of affection that you quickly flinch away from, clearly flustered but instead feigning annoyance.

"that's a stupid way to describe it".

"was just describing what i saw".

"okay then responsible adult, go get up and do responsible adult things".

renjun rolls his eyes, shoving your shoulder and rising from his comfortable blanket, stretching his arms above his head. he slaps your thigh, eliciting a small yelp from you. "come on, let's go".

you seem puzzled by that order. "let's go where?"

"to the bathroom, we have to go brush our teeth".

"we?"

"yes we, get up i have an extra toothbrush for you".

so, again like a lost puppy, you rise from your place on renjun's bed and follow behind him to the bathroom.

you find it laughable how easily you fall under his control.

"do you enjoy ordering me around?"

"i think you enjoy being ordered around" renjun is quick to accuse, an accusation that you just chuckle at, which is all he needs as confirmation. he gets into a familiar spot in front of his mirror, picking up his toothbrush and turning on the sink. "you never question my orders, you always follow me around, do you like that in guys?"

you laugh at the words, clearly amused but clearly not offended. he picks up an extra toothbrush and hands it over to you, having to resist the urge to smile at the sight of your messy hair. "you could say something like that".

renjun scoffs softly. "you're gross" he comments, rolling his eyes as he begins brushing his teeth, staring at you through the reflection of the mirror. renjun focuses less on brushing his teeth and more on how pretty you look, even having just rolled out of bed and hair pretty much messed out of proportion, you still look so beautiful in his eye.

you notice his eyes on you, and seeing as he's currently brushing his teeth, you decide to take your chance. "if you like how i look that much you can just say so".

renjun almost bites down on his toothbrush upon hearing the words. clever asshole, he says in his head, irritated by how you took that opportunity to make a witty comment.

you grin in victory, beginning to brush your teeth just as renjun spits out the toothpaste formerly in his mouth. "you think you're sooo smooth, huh?"

he's annoyed, most definitely flustered, though, if his red cheeks are any indicator, but he's not going to give the satisfaction of flustering him (even though you definitely did). you nod at his question, proud of your flirty little comment.

"you're so annoying".

"and cute right?"

the two of you make eye contact through the mirror reflection again, and you use that opportunity to wink at him while he has his eyes on you, only making renjun scrunch his nose again.

"you're not cute".

"i think you'd disagree, seeing as how you were literally devouring me back in that bathroom".

renjun sends you a glare, immediately flipping you off as he sees you wink again in the reflection of the mirror.

"at least be nice to me".

renjun rolls his eyes so much that he's sure they're going to get stuck in the same spot.

oh you're so good at annoying him.

AT 10:48 AM, RENJUN FOUND HIMSELF IN a spot he'd rather not be in. he lets na jaemin get away with things way too often, because there are way too many bottles on the floor and at least half of them were drank by him. still, he can't just leave the mess on the floor, it's not like it'll clean itself up. after eating breakfast, and making sure to insult your favorite cereals, renjun stared at the hefty bottle mess on the floor for what seemed like years. he then rolled his eyes and let out a groan knowing he had to clean it all up. he can't really make an excuse now, so, he starts his picking up the empty bottles off the floor, cursing in his head as he finds himself starting to get annoyed once again.

"renjun! do you see this?"

oh right, you're still here. renjun pauses to look over at you, and he lightly chuckles at what he sees. your standing there (in one of his sweaters by the way holy shit) with a polaroid camera in your hands. it's a camera renjun recognizes, he used to love that thing when he first got it, but he forgot about it after a while. "where'd you find that?"

"in your room".

renjun raises an eyebrow, a grin tugging at his lips. "were you going through my stuff?"

you look baffled by the question, and you quickly stutter through your response. "no! no! i wasn't i was just looking for a sweater because you told me to and i found it in your closet!"

renjun finds it easy to laugh at your display, and the frown on your face is so cute he has to resist the urge to kiss you right then and there. "okay then, what's so interesting about it?"

"well nothing in particular i just really like polaroid cameras!"

you're so.. cute? adorable? precious? all of those adjectives describe you perfectly. you're always so giddy about the things your into, even the hobbies most people would consider "boring" you talk about with such interest, renjun has no idea why he notices you this way, it's never been like this with most of his new years flings. yeah most of them have made it to his home, but it's simply something about you, you make renjun feel a sort of way he never thought he'd feel for a guy he met at a bar on new years eve.

you don't feel like just a fling, you feel like more than that, you sort of feel like home in a way. he would love to go out with you sometime, even if the new years eve bathroom makeout session never happened, he thinks a date with you would be perfect, he can already envision it now.

but wait, why is he doing that? why is he standing here, staring at your pretty face, and thinking about dating you? there's no way he feels anything serious for you, right? it's not like he's in love with you, he can't be! you don't fall in love with someone you've only known for a good eleven hours!

he isn't even sure if he knows what love is, but he knows he can't be in love with you.

renjun snaps out of his thoughts when he hears the click of a camera, he immediately turns to over to you, and he frowns as he sees your fingers on the button of the camera. "y/n".

you blink, catching his frown, any playfulness in your tone immediately disappears. "what? did i do something wrong?"

"why'd you take a picture?"

you again seem baffled by the question, because you let out a small snicker. "you looked very pretty in the moment".

"i don't think that's true".

"it is! you're so photogenic are you kidding me!?"

you stare at the polaroid containing the picture of renjun in your hands, smiling softly at what you see. renjun smiles at the words, feeling his cheeks flare up as you gaze down at the polaroid. "you're so corny".

"and you're still cornier".

renjun snickers, but he doesn't say anymore, turning away from you to focus back on picking up the bottles on the floor. you finally look up, placing the polaroid of him on the counter. "you seem very into that".

you hum, stepping closer to him. "i told you! i really like polaroid cameras!" renjun turns back to you, and he almost falls onto the floor realizing how close you are.

you stare down at the camera, playing with the several buttons. "i don't have a polaroid camera back at my place, but i have a point and shoot camera! maybe i can show it to you sometime".

you smile as you say those words, immediately turning around and going to place the camera on the counter, you miss renjun's reaction to your words. what did you mean by sometime? does that mean you're still going to talk after this? does that mean you're planning to take him to your place at least once? he can't help but overthink the words instantly.

but before he can ask you about it, you gasp. "you've been cleaning on your own the whole time!? let me help you!"

and renjun doesn't exactly know when to bring up his many thoughts, so the two of you begin cleaning the bottles together. you make sure to slip out a few more flirty comments in that time, comments that renjun makes sure to combat with steady glares and muttered curses, even with how red his face becomes.

for some reason, this feels.. right. renjun finds cleaning with you to be fun, he's enjoying even the smallest of moments he can share with you.

it sort of feels like you two are dating.

renjun spends way too much of his time staring at you. staring at you pick up bottles from the floor, staring at you ramble about cereal, staring at you take many more polaroids of him, polaroids you stated you'd "cherish forever".

this is strange, it's strange how he feels. it's strange how you make him feel, he doesn't remember the last time he ever felt this way for any guy, for anyone.

so, as renjun watches you wash the dishes, listening to your ramblings, he wonders if this is what love feels like, if this is what you were talking about back at the bar when you first met. you snicker at something you said in one of your random stories, but you stop as you notice renjun zoning out, clearly not paying attention to you.

"what are you thinking about?" you ask, drying off the plate and placing it back in the rack. renjun again snaps out of his daze, immediately breaking eye contact with you as he feels his face burn. "come on! renjunie~"

your wet finger touches his cheek, making him bite his inner cheek. "just.. something".

"you're not going to tell me about this something?"

renjun shakes his head, uncharacteristically silent. "i don't know if i'm ready to tell you about my stupid thoughts".

you get his words, so you don't press on. "alright, if you ever do want to tell me, you know i'm here".

renjun can only really stare at you, it's then that the realization dawns on him. oh god he likes you, he likes you so much that he might die if he doesn't spit it out instantly.

and when he sees you smile again, he has to use every ounce of energy in his body to not collapse onto the floor.

AT 6:17 PM, RENJUN FOUND HIMSELF IN a little bit of a crisis, a crisis that's begun all because of you. he feels his palms begin getting sweaty, and he can't stare at you for too long or he'll literally melt from how heated his face is becoming. it's literally january, it should be so cold that he's frozen, but he's burning every time he stares at you. he feels so embarrassed just saying something to you, and you can clearly tell you're getting to him because your smiles slowly begin to turn into smirks, smirks that burn into his brain and make his thoughts turn into mush in an instant. now he can't really tell you about his thoughts, because he's afraid of spilling his true feelings if he does.

renjun doesn't feel like any of this is intentional, you're not stringing him along just so you can break his heart and never contact him again.. at least, he hopes you're not. renjun feels like he's been through this exact process so many times, but none of the previous times have ever transpired like this before. you have to be an alien of some sorts, renjun has never met someone like you.

he hears his inner voice laughing in his mind, making fun of him for falling so easily into your hands. you do this each time, renjun, you say it's going to be different this coming new year and it never is, how long until you stop falling for these guys who don't care?

a pit forms in his stomach at the thought, and renjun finds himself upset much more easily than he thought he'd be.

love is weird, love has always been weird. it's never been easy for renjun to ever get love, either he got backstabbed by someone he thought he was on good terms with, or they would ghost him because they weren't interested but couldn't say it with their own fucking words.

why does he assume it'll be any different with you?

why does he assume that you're probably just as into him as he is you? what if he's reading everything wrong and you're really only here for one thing? what if you're just playing the long game?

renjun feels like he has no idea what's real or what's not. he can't read you and it makes him much more anxious than anything, he doesn't want to think that you're just like everyone else but considering his luck with love on new years, you probably are.

he feels like he's about to throw up.

"are you really going to quit your job?"

renjun asks that question out of desperation, out of the need for a conversation. your eyes flick over to him, and a smile comes to your face as you register the question. you look so pretty, the lighting in the room accentuates your features. "with the way it's going there? yeah".

"aren't you afraid of not being able to find more work..?" he bites his inner cheek, he has no idea why he asks that, he doesn't have control over your actions, you could quit whenever you want to, what difference would his opinion make.

"no, i have backup plans for that".

renjun didn't really expect that as an answer, but it's a good answer nonetheless, because he finds himself smiling at your words. "what's with your job that's shitty? is it the people? is it your coworkers?"

"that place is making me feel like garbage under someone's shoe, can't do anything without being yelled at or cussed out by a higher up because i'm being slow, customers lay their hands on me and i can't even do anything because the customer is always right!"

your frustrated, genuinely, probably the first ever time he's seen you frustrated since the clock struck twelve. just seeing you so frustrated is enough to weird him out, so he quickly tries to change the subject. "i hope you succeed at your resolution, that place sounds like hell".

"it is hell, the moment i can escape the confines of that place i'll be free, but anyway, what are you going to do to make your resolution come true?"

renjun blinks at you, mind suddenly blank. "what?"

you shift in your place on the other side of the couch, focusing all of your attention on renjun, who is struggling not to melt under your stare. "your resolution was to stop making mistakes with people you love or whatever, how are you going to fulfill that?"

renjun pauses, silence enveloping the room, he doesn't exactly know how to answer that, yeah he said his resolution with confidence, but that might've just been the alcohol that was in his system at that moment. how was he supposed to stop making the same mistake over and over again if he was currently doing it right now? he's sitting here with you, the cute guy he met at a bar on new years eve that he couldn't resist, it's a repetitive cycle that will never end.

renjun feels like an idiot, a hypocrite, how did he manage to fail at his whole resolution on new years day? he can't believe how easily he surrendered himself to you.

but when renjun glances up at you, catching your eyes in the process, he almost wants to fall into your arms and never leave them, he wants to wrap his arms around you and never let go.

"i think that resolution will take a while to reach, love is complicated and all.. i really just need time, i guess".

"time?"

renjun is afraid his voice is going to sound too quiet if he speaks. you stare at him with those eyes again, you stare at him as if you're in love with him, and renjun thinks that's crazy, because why would you ever be in love with him? the idea is a stupid one, he should cast it aside.

"yeah time, time is precious.. love takes time, i think this year, i'll be willing to wait for it".

the words strike you in a way you don't expect, and renjun picks up on it, because you pause for a moment and stare at him for a while. you stare for so long that renjun swears he's going to melt under your gaze, you then smile, your smile so pretty that renjun swears he's going to fall to the floor.

"how long are you willing to wait?"

"as long as it takes".

your about to respond again, but renjun quickly stands up, changing the subject. "do you like coffee ice cream?" he immediately asks, glancing at his fridge as he tries his best to pretend he's unaffected by your pretty eyes staring at him like that.

your eyes light up, clearly entertained by the idea of an ice cream party happening. "yeah, i like all ice cream flavors".

renjun snorts, clearly amused by your response. "weirdo".

you furrow your eyebrows, feigning offense at the words. renjun smiles at the perturbed look on your face, walking over to his fridge to go get the ice cream he had mentioned. "your calling me weird? you're so mean to me".

renjun doesn't listen to your complaints, he snickers at your tone of voice. you frown as you hear him laugh, crossing your arms stubbornly and turning away from him when he comes back with pints of ice cream. "are you mad at me?"

you don't respond.

renjun scoffs playfully, sitting down across from you. he blinks at you, watching you resist the urge to smile. "y/n~"

"shut up i'm trying to ignore you".

"you can't ignore me! or no ice cream!"

you gasp at the words, immediately giving him all of your attention. "hey! you can't do that if you offered it to me!"

"i can! and i will!"

"come on huang renjun!"

renjun only giggles as your complaints skyrocket in volume.

AT 11:34 PM, RENJUN FOUND HIMSELF ON top of the world. okay, not literally, but he felt like he was at the very moment. you had stayed for much longer than the both of you intended for you to, you kept saying that you would leave whenever, stop making renjun feel uncomfortable (did you really think you were making him feel that way? oh you have no idea), but he continued to deny your claims, he denied it until 11 o'clock rolled around and he found himself back at the time he started, except it was all different now. renjun is on the rooftop of his apartment building, staring up at the sky and the shining stars that create a line of luminosity across the airspace. the only reason renjun is on the roof right now is because you convinced him.

you managed to convinced him so easily, pleading eyes on display and pout enormous.

"renjun?" you asked as you walked into the kitchen, staring outside the open window at the night sky, lightly shivering at the cold air that hit you. "can i ask for a favor?"

renjun turned to you, running a hand through his hair as he stared at you. he's probably do you a million favors, how hasn't he done you one today?

"yeah, ask away".

you paused for a moment, staring at renjun for a what seemed like forever (in renjun's metrics), a seemingly anxious look in your eyes. "are we allowed to go to the rooftop of the building?"

renjun furrowed his eyebrows, puzzled by the question, why would you be curious about that?

"uh.. why?"

you stayed silent for a while, the longest you've ever gone without talking to renjun this day, that's weird, he's used to you running your mouth all the time. your eyes casted to the side, and renjun narrowed his own, noticing your sudden nervousness.

"i wanna go look at the stars.." you muttered, not looking at renjun as you said those words.

renjun let out a small laugh at the realization of what you wanted, but you seemed to think he was making fun of you, because you looked away again, clearly embarrassed by his laughter. "you know what we don't have to just pretend i never asked that i'll go now—"

"no no no! don't take it that way, i think it's cute, i'll go with you".

renjun likes describing your fascination for stars as 'cute', a fact that you made sure to note as you watched him grab his jacket. "what are you waiting for? come on!"

and what do you do when the huang renjun gives you an order? you obey like a mind controlled robot.

so, you allowed for renjun to take your hand (an action that flustered you much more than it should've) and lead you up to roof of his apartment building, the cold january air doing nothing to deter him from his mission, the mission he wanted to complete because of you.

your fingers are still intertwined when you make it up there, but your now less focused on his warm hands and more on the luminous lights in the night sky. your jacket is unzipped, barely protecting you from the freezing temperature of the outside, but the stars are much more appealing to you.

renjun chuckles lightly, feeling you squeeze his hand as another breeze of cold air rushes past you. "you're so into them y/n" he teases, nudging you with his shoulder.

"they're so pretty" you mutter, your eyes practically sparkling with amazement.

renjun watches you for what seems like forever (in his own metrics), distracted by your face. he admires your pure interest, it makes him smile, a smile that you clearly notice, as he catches your glancing eyes.

you then sigh, shivering lightly from the cold air outside. "renjun, i have a question for you".

your tone is much more serious than he expects it to be, and a pit forms in his stomach almost immediately. "you have to answer it with complete honesty though okay?"

renjun almost can't look you in the eye, and you grab both of his hands, facing him as you begin swinging your laced hands back and forth. renjun nods, almost a little too enthusiastically, but he can't exactly worry about that right now.

"do you like me?"

god of course i do, are you stupid?

but renjun bites his tongue, just chuckling and looking to the side. he squeezes your hands, looking back at you with an indescribable expression. "yes".

you look surprised, which surprises renjun himself. "yes? like actually—"

"y/n i don't know what you think has been transpiring today but— i don't know i really do like you, i'm not sure if it's love yet or whatever but i don't want to just let you go, i don't want for this day to end and for us to go back to being strangers again i.. i want to keep you in my life".

you blink, baffled by the words. your face reddens, you hope you can use the cold as an excuse for that. "really?"

renjun lets out a silent laugh, you're so cute. "yes really, was i not obvious?"

"was i not obvious?"

renjun realizes the irony of the situation, and he giggles again, looking down at the floor. "you're so dumb y/n" he pokes your cheek with his index finger. "but yeah, i'd like to go out with you sometime.. like, on a date".

your about to fall to the floor.

"alright, we can start with that.. dates, no labels, no rushing, we can take time with this".

renjun likes the sound of that, and he communicates that thought to you with another squeeze of your hand, smiling prettily at you. "i can get behind that" he leans closer intentionally. "can i still kiss you though?"

you roll your eyes, he's adorable, you lean forward and press a kiss to his lips, your way of answering his question. "yes, you dummy".

renjun scoffs softly, ignoring how quickly his face is heating up. "you're corny".

"and you're still cornier".

renjun would fight with you on it, but he thinks he'll let you have this win tonight.

RENJUN IS EATING HIS LUNCH WHEN JAEMIN brings it up, he wasn't really listening to his friends converse all this time, distracted by something else, or someone else.. he supposes. his head finally shoots up after a good twenty minutes of him ignoring his friends conversation about if mark could beat jeno in a fight, and he's met with a smug smiling na jaemin, a look he's quick to furrow his eyebrows at. jaemin snickers as he sees renjun's confusion, ready to ask a completely idiotic question. "renjunie? how did you and your little fling turned out?" the question is one jaemin probably should've asked a week ago, but he's asking it now that january is coming to a close? how amusing.

renjun blinks, chuckling immediately at the question. "what do you mean?"

jaemin scowls, slapping his arm lightly. "that cute guy you took home on new years eve! what happened between you two?"

"oh the cute guy?" chenle is quick to inquire as he turns to the older, jaemin nods in response. "yeah him! what was his name again..? y/n?"

"oh right! he was cute! did he let you hit?"

"excuse me?"

"i can't believe i passed out!" donghyuck whines in frustration, earning a small pat on the back from jeno, who was trying his best to stifle his giggles. "i wanted to meet renjun's cute guy" he pouts, sinking into his seat with crossed arms.

"oh he was so cute, hyuck, renjun got lucky with him".

"and funny too! funnier than the asshole from our last new years eve outing!"

renjun simply watches as jaemin and chenle go on to rave about you to donghyuck, who seems impressed even though you aren't even there, he laughs in his head at the fact, you're so charming you don't even have to be present to impress his friends.

"he sounds better than the other guys".

"he is!"

jaemin then turns back to renjun, forgetting about his first mission entirely. "soooo renjunie? how'd it go with your guy? did you sleep with him?"

renjun's face flushes at the question, he is very much embarrassed. he rolls his eyes, face practically on fire. "..yes".

"was he good?"

"don't ask that!"

jaemin yelps at the slap he gets from renjun, pouting as he stares at him. "asshole" he's quick to say, sticking his tongue out at the older, who just rolls his eyes again.

"so what happened after that?"

"what?"

chenle is clearly very invested in this. "did he just leave after that? did you get his number? are you two still in touch?"

"and if you aren't can you give me his socials?"

renjun gives jaemin a side glare, answering the question with almost a minute of silence. he hesitates before saying anything, earning weird looks from his friends. "well.."

"come on! spit it out!"

"don't rush me" renjun grits his teeth, fidgeting with the collar of his shirt as he thinks about you, a small smile coming to his face as he does. "were going on a date later today.."

chenle gasps, jaemin yells, donghyuck slams his hand onto the table, and jeno begins silently clapping. "real shit!?"

"yeah.."

"oh my god!" jaemin squeals, shaking renjun out of pure excitement. "congrats renjunie!"

renjun just lets him at this point, laughing at his energy. "don't get so up, it's not official yet were just going out".

"still! progress is being made!"

renjun can't resist his smile, and he looks down to avoid eye contact with his friends.

"renjun!"

renjun snaps his head towards the voice, seeing the front desk clerk walking up to him with a bouquet of peonies in his hands. "hi, do you need something?"

the clerk smiles, extending the bouquet towards him. "a guy came here and dropped these off, he told me to give them to you".

renjun blinks, slowly taking the bouquet of flowers as he pieces the puzzle together. "thank you" he whispers, staring at the flowers in his hands as his face heats up quickly.

as he examines the bouquet, ignoring the teasing of his friends, he finds a note, a note that he immediately smiles at upon reading.

a little birdie told me these were your favorite flowers? i can see why :) anyway, eat well, i'll see you tonight pretty!!

love, y/n ♡

oh you're so sweet.

jaemin gasps as he reads from the older's shoulder. "i can't believe it! you hit the jackpot with this guy renjunie!" but renjun can't even find it in himself to get mad at jaemin for being nosy, he's too busy trying to not cry at this gesture.

renjun can't believe he has you, he feels so lucky, like the happiest guy in the world.

"why can't i get flowers from a cute guy? when is it my turn?!"

renjun only chuckles at chenle's complaints, much too distracted thinking about you.

[wuntrum]

Oooh I just started rewatching Twin Peaks yesterday! The last time I saw it was around 4 or 5 years ago. Just putting on the first episode again made me realize how much like home this weird little show feels like to me. It’s been nice to see your enthusiasm for it on my dash :)

may I ask what you enjoy most about the show, or why it appeals to you, if anything comes to mind? I find it’s a bit of an odd one to try recommending to people - I love it, of course, but my taste is a little strange, and I don’t find other fans out in the wild that often.

oooh, that's an interesting question! i think theres a lot of aspects that appeal to me about twin peaks...on a very surface level i love the aesthetics of the show, as someone who lives in new england (pacific northwest and new england are connected pacman-map-style in my mind), the settings and fashion are all excellent. i also love its absurdity, i love the fact that no one talks like a real person and theres people with such weird and distinct archetypes and over the top emotions all colliding with each other---that, and the way it approaches the sort of worldbuilding going on, plus the importance of dreams in the narrative contribute to such an interesting and dreamy atmosphere. i think what makes twin peaks special compared to things that were made after it and were inspired by parts of it is that even when its confusing and strange on a literal level, its always emotionally resonant--you don't need to understand it, because you feel it. the way they're able to set up all the people and relationships in this town so quickly, you really feel like you're a fly on the wall in this living and breathing place, even when its strange. you rarely see how buildings and places connect, but you don't need to because its all so convincing as a woven together location (and of course thats for like logistical/filming purposes, but it creates an interesting effect lol). it uses the familiarity of americana tropes (and even television tropes) and distorts them to create meaning, while still keeping parts of their signifiers intact. even watching it for the first time in 2021 was shocking throughout, so i genuinely can't imagine how it felt catching it live when it was airing, like there was nothing else like it! the fact that david lynch helped to make a prime time television show is something that like logically should never have happened, but i'm so glad it did. i also think on a production/creative level, its so interesting to see how it sort of morphed and developed as the original run and fire walk with me and the return unfolded, like what themes were dropped versus what (at first) insignificant details were given meaning and expanded upon.

i do think it can be a hard sell to convince people to give it a chance--i've had a friend or two try to watch it and say its too slow for them, or it just wasn't clicking. but i've also had more friends really get into it, probably because i have a lot of weirdo artsy friends (i say that with love of course). but i think it's a great gateway into other weird and absurd stuff, or at least it was for me. i also enjoy a good ol "weird thing happening in small town" story, and so it was interesting watching twin peaks and then revisiting stuff that was clearly inspired by it, or at least partially (welcome to night vale, s1 of stranger things...s1 of riverdale. but also i think the return has its own sort of inspiration fuel, like season 4 of barry and beau is afraid struck me in the same way that the return did)

[bellisima-writes]

10 Questions for Fic Writers

Thanks so much for the tag @katiefrog217!!

Absolutely NO pressure tagging, but these folks have written some lovely pieces on AO3 and if they want to participate and talk about their art, they deserve to: @di-42, @addledmongoose, @notalostcausejustyet, @hikarry

1. How many works do you have on AO3? |

Two (one completed and one WIP about 40-50% done)

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

*shifts uncomfortably in chair*

According to the stats page I just discovered (seriously how long has THAT thing been there?), I've published 185,536 words on AO3 (WHATTTTTTT in the what?!?).

3. What Fandoms do You Write For?

I've only ever written for Good Omens.

If we want to discuss what other Fandoms I have hyperfixated on and created elaborate stories only to not ever write them down? Then we can also include BBC Sherlock, The X Files, Stranger Things, and my OG from when I was a kid, Star Trek TNG. But I've only ever put pen to paper for Good Omens.

4. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Every. Single. One. If someone cares enough about what I write to make a comment, I am absolutely responding. The only time I don't respond to each is if there are multiple on a single chapter or I respond to one from a later chapter before the earlier one. Otherwise, I really do try to respond and thank every reader who's ever left me a note. It means the world to me.

5. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Nope.

6. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, but I've discussed it briefly with some people and would honestly love to.

7. What's your all-time favorite ship?

Aziraphale/Crowley. Though when I was a kid I was also obsessed with Niles and Daphne from Fraiser and every time I rewatch that show I am right back there (yes...old I know but it was good soup back in the Must See TV Thursday era).

8. What are your Writing Strengths?

Ummm...I think I build good plot, tension and (somewhat) unexpected twists into stories well. I have an inability to not try to figure out puzzles, which makes me annoying to watch movies with but turns out is a good skill for actually building twisty stories.

I also personally think my characterization and dialogue are strong, but that could be up for debate.

9. What are your Writing Weaknesses?

One completed fic and one WIP at 185k words is pretty self explanatory, I think. I spend a lot of time in set up and making sure the plot points I write are earned and while I do lean on the source material, I also feel a compulsive need to build out the motivations of my versions of these characters.

I can't write something thats out of character, my brain literally won't let me. It will get painfully stuck until I admit, this would not happen this way and abandon the scene and start over. I have an entirely written alternate version of the Last Angel that I completely scrapped at one point because it just wasn't right...

I also struggle with descriptive language. It's why I never, ever thought to write before entering this fandom last fall. Fanfiction is such a gift because everyone already has a picture of the world you're writing, of the people who are speaking, of their tone of voice, and so you don't have to spend time describing the landscape or physical qualities. So that huge gap in my skillset doesn't affect the story as much.

And humor. I want to be funny, so badly. And lighthearted. But my stuff tends to lean into the difficult themes in the universes the stories take place in. People who write humor well are unicorns and I worship them. Part of the reason I scrapped that alternate version of the Last Angel was because I was leaning into the funny a lot more and it just ended up not feeling realistic to the situation.

And grammar. My grammar could always grammar better.

10. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

My initial Good Omens fic was the first story I ever wrote.

[weirdcat1213]

volume 12 already? damn that went fast. just yesterday we were crying about vash drinking in a church

anyway :D volume 12 thoughts time

chap 1:

-chronicaaaaaaaaa :3

-AW NO MY BABY

-these quiet panels are the fucking best/worst thing that have ever happened to me

-too many memories :c

-YES LINA IS THERE THANK GOD (at the same time this is heartbreaking as fuck)

-all the enemies after all the people he has ever loved/helped

-HIS MOM AND HIS BF

-THATS IT THATS THE ONE THATS THE PANEL OH GOD WE ARE *HERE*

-im gonna go cry now

-i wonder what "anti plant" entails...is it a special material?

-ok fine, chronica can call knives a terrorist. she gets a pass

-oh sweet geesus

-eh?

-oohhhhhh.....ok fuck

-nothing can stop the hatred of this man. kinda admirable but as the song says "your misery and hate will kill us all"

chap 2:

-"corrosive thunder", love the title

-OH SHIT DOMINA NO, pls dont let him get to you

-DOMINA NOOOOOO

-the plants kinda look in pain there....

-MY GIRLSSSSSSSSSS

-for pain purposes, i choose to believe that when they resonate they hum like vash did in stampede

-aaand shes gone

-oh god, the end of evangelion flashbacks

-OH NIGHTOW YOU SON OF A BISCUIT- THOSE EYES IN THE BACKGROUND-

-tbh everything in your ship just being consumed by someone else so quickly must be scary af. nothing belongs to them anymore and soon, chronica could even loose herself

chap 3:

-oh shit oh fuck oh shit

-oh shit not thors hammer

-omg look! the laws of physics!

-noooo :c we dont get to know domina too much but its still sad

-OH?

-MAGIC BULLETS TIME BABYYYYYYYYYYY

-ohhhhhhh okok i get it

chap 4:

-THATS MY BOIIIIIIIIIII

-AH SHIT IVE JUST NOTICED THE HAIR

-ALSO PLS DONT SMILE LIKE THAT-

-childish is a good word for it cuz knives just doesnt want to accept hes wrong and scared

-THE POWER OF LOVE AND PEACE BITCH

-is vash pausing cuz even though his plan was to kill knives hes kinda sad that knives wants to kill him? i may never know

-let him use his fucking gun ok? hes an expert. also i like to think he uses it to stay grounded. like to stay with the people hes fighting with. hes not superior or anything

-TO YOUR KNEES BITCH TO YOUR FUCKING KNEES

-THATS MY FUCKING GUNMAN THATS MY SON RIGHT THERE

chap 5:

-FLASHBACK TIME LETS GO

-omg right it hated this. hes just a baby :c

-so vash left with a stranger? i forgot about that

-honey just be glad YOU ARE ALIVE

-BECAUSE HES VASH THE STAMPEDE- i should rewatch that episode huh

-GEESUS BRO

-tbh vash, you should have. then and now

-YEAH TELL HIM VASH >:D YOU ARENT NAIVE

-tbh i would also think thats enough to break the chain. hmm

-"stay with me" vash pls i cant jump into the void rn

-GEESUS CHRIST, the cleanest cut in the west

-also you think vash made that face cuz the last time he made someone bleed was rem-

-THE CLOSEUP TO THE MOUTHS AHHHHHHHHHHH

-"we dont belong in the future of this planet" dont fucking say that

chap 6:

-actually wanting to humans to talk with plants is a great step for improving their relationship but sure knives, whatever

-THATS SO TRUE VASH LETS GO, LET THE PLANTS HAVE A SAY IN IT

-ive said this before but as someone who was mocked by wanting context before judging people, vash is so...reassuring. like it wasnt wrong of me to want to know all the sides of one story. im glad

-also i completely forgot about that town and radiation. how tf radiation happens in that planet, what am i missing

-oh nvm, thanks nightow

-HES NOT EXCUSING, HES EXPLAINING OMFG YOU IDIOT

-YEAH FUCKING TELL HIM >:D POP OFF VASH >:D

-WHY IS IT THEN? HUH KNIVES?- oh shit what

-yknow what, ill give knives the fact that humans are ignorant and we are repeating history etc etc, but im done. finish him vash

-for some reason this reminds me to that scene with the soldiers in ep 12. my man really cant catch a break

-YEAH THE GIRLSSSSSSSSSSSS :D

-"you've been abandoned" maybe by some but not by everyone. and thats the whole point

-YEAH YOU ARENT BABY ILY

-HOLD UP IS THAT HER FACE?????

-awww :c

chap 7:

-IS IT LIVIO TIME????

-YO WTF, WHO SHOT MY GIRL

-ofc the military would be like this

-i literally cant say whos bleeding

-ah fuck ok

-ugh no...pls dont tell me hes fucking bleeding through his eyes...pls dont (if i see stampede vash bleeding like that i will eat my pc piece by piece)

-chronica :c

-LIVIOOOOOOOOO :0

-OMG YES, YES, IM SO HAPPY. quoting 98 "and i know in my heart he would have done the same"

-MR. VASH, MR. LIVIO AWWW :3

-OH HES SPINNING THOSE FUCKERS :D

-oh well thats not fair, hes too cool

-wait why is knives not wanting to kill vash bad?

chap 8:

-considering the blockers chronica has, entering a fused entity must be scary but also exciting

-ngl i dont get the spikes on the screen thing

-geesus

-WTF YOU DID TO HIM???

-wait no i want to see whats happening with vash- and its livio time

-oh hes alive thank god (this is my 2nd read why am i surprised)

-OH NO ITS THAT MOMENT OH NNONONONO STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME

-i hate seeing his eyes like that if im being honest, its scary

-ESO MAMONAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA GET UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP

-LIVIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

-OH SHIT its my wife

-OH WAIT MY OTHER WIFE IS HERE TOO

-VASH WHY ARE YOU MAKING THAT FACE

-OH GOD NOT LEGATO AND THE RUSSIAN DOLL

-CAN SHIT STOP HAPPENING FOR A MINUTE

-THERES TOO MANY PEOPLE HERE CAN YALL CALM THE FUCK DOWN

chap 9:

-omg its the legato episode

-what is happening, what am i looking at

-oh oh shit

-RIGHT IN HIS MF EYE

-what is happening?

-ok flashback time

-yeap. its that time. shit

-geesus fucking christ. tbh ofc legato would think knives is right. there was nothing to prove him wrong

-yeap. i would do the same actually. stomp on his head

-oh honey...honey thats gay-

-is that why he has short hair...cuz knives gave him a name AND A HAIR STYLE??

-damn son

-also i may be wrong but where do people get the idea he inserted metal in his own brain to have those powers?/gen

[depresseddepot]

actually i don't want a second season. i want to be full of questions that never get answered and i want the directing team's credibility to stay intact and not get beaten away by rabid fans who are upset the experience is over

[redxblueihateloveyou]

Hiiii!!! 💫💕🌸🥳

Can I bother with a question... I was (re)watching that zhang qiling edit (not today) - 'cause it's so cool, btw- and I wondered if Reboot Xiaoge’s your favourite one...? And if you're up to answering, what do you think about the other adaptations? Especially (our small bean) xiao yuliang's interpretation of xiaoge?

🤗🌺💐🐰💕

Hey, my precious patootie hehe ILY it always makes me very happy knowing that you rewatch my vids <3

lol dang it, I was kinda hoping to avoid this question, just because I feel like I'd find it hella hard to explain some things, but I'll try my best and hopefully it'll make some sense xD

I'll start from afar bc I wanna try to explain my reasonings, since I don't want to go without arguments into such highly debated question lolz. I talked about this a bit in my previous asks somewhere, but not broadly as to why that one guy hit all the right spots.

So throughout the books Wu Xie always does this wonderful thing, where he very tangibly describes the feeling he gets when Xiaoge is near, I mean like the aura around him. And he always somehow does it so colorful, that this mix of safety, assurance, calmness, composure and some things I can't quite put into one noun, that he brings to him, I think everyone who've read the books can recognize as this almost magical "Xiaoge feeling". It's not just the way he acts in some dangerous situations or smth like that. It's just everything. You either have it or you don't. And here goes my first argument... to me none of them, except for Huang Junjie and Yuliang have it.

I mean it's not even the obvious stuff, it's like the way they move during the action scenes, the way they even stand and hold themselves, the way they touch Wu Xie, the tone of their voices (both of which are like soothing as fuck), little things you'd think wouldn't matter, but when you watch it and all the puzzle pieces are together, you're like... fuck yeah, thats him.

Also not really that weighty of a point, but to me there's always a joy to see that the actor who plays the character not only gets what's he's playing, but also loves it, bc it's always seen on screen. Usually when some asked about the character they play and what they have in common for example they answer with obvious things like if some character is introverted they're like "well I also don't talk very much" or smth like that, you know what I mean. When I was watching interviews of Yuliang and Huang Junjie I was just smiling so much, bc they've said such things that made me go "yeah, Qiling is safe in their hands".

In Reboot case working in such close proximity with the author definitely also played a huge role here. Bc it kinda gets complicated in some aspects since the books are written from Wu Xie's point of view and you can't only base your picture on his perspective, just bc it's coming from a person who after being basically told "you're my whole world" goes "I'm just a person he randomly passes by in his long life" in his thoughts. Not only he's utterly clueless and dumb when it comes to all this, that he wouldn't notice the way Qiling looks at him and other things, its also not that kind of book, that would go "I suddenly caught poker face looking at me like I'm his whole existence" (and I honestly don't want it to be that book lmao). So you have to take into the account here stuff like what author says to get the whole picture, bc if you look at that from the point of Qiling's view for example, this shit takes a whole wild turn. So I really loved that in UN and Reboot ways of showing Qiling's feelings were well thought out and fit the timeline.

Bc it also works both ways, when it comes to other adaptations. Like Qiling is very and I mean ETREMELY hard to win over. We all know that it was a very long process of gaining his trust and even longer for him to fall for Wu Xie to the point of him being his everything. So what I want in those interpretations is for them to get at which point of their relationships what Xiaoge's behavior makes sense. I do not need any fanservice if it ruins the character, I'll just hate it. The thing that their feelings didn't come out of nowhere is what I LOVE about this ship, bc I'm not the kind of person who believes in "we love for nothing" thing and love at first sight thing (only "got hots for each other" at first sight), bc thats bull. Wu Xie became his everything after a long LONG process of getting to know each other. At the beginning tho he was the same stranger to him as everyone else. So what Reboot Qiling feels for Wu Xie is not what UN's Qiling feels for Wu Xie yet and what UN's Qiling feels for Wu Xie is not what Lost Tomb's Qiling feels for Wu Xie (which at that point was nothing). And I feel like not everyone gets the fact that you can totally wreck the character if you make him behave not the way he behaved in that particular time. Like for example, if someone would make a MDZS adaptation where at the very beginning of their relationships LZ treats WWX the way he treated him after the reincarnation just because "who cares, it's still LZ", that would be dumb af, see what I mean. So Xiaoge having a weakness for Wu Xie in part one is automatically not a Xiaoge to me, bc a huge part of his character and the thing NPSS speaks a lot about is just how IMPOSSIBLE it is for someone to catch his attention and how long it took Wu Xie to get there. So let's just say to me UN and Reboot Qilings for the first time didn't feel like some mashup or character summary/parody, they were Qilings the way they are supposed to be in that part of the story, bc it was the only times someone actually bothered to coordinate it.

Now as to why I prefer one to another. Xiaoge has this thing... the way he holds himself with other people, that is sometimes intentionally and sometimes unintentionally suppressing.

Like everyone knows that if you're a passerby, Qiling genuinely doesn't fucking care and would in fact be pretty harsh about it in terms of treating people like they do not deserve their attention. He won't be like "please, don't bother me", he simply ignored them like an empty space. He is also like that with acquaintances who in his opinion do not deserve his respect like that girl who went hysterical, bc she was upset that he was the only one who wasn't drooling on her like all other men on the crew, Chen Wenjin, Wu Xie's uncles and etc. He's not openly disrespectful unless they trigger him in some way (usually by trying to act superior or later on for not treating Wu Xie right), but if they do, he will in fact remind them their place in sometimes a very rude way, at times humiliating them in front of ppl bc he looks younger than them and talking starts.

He's always doing things on his own terms and hates being told what to do. Like he legit scared Chen Wenjin just with a look and the tone of his voice when he said "let go", when she tried to command him on the mission and grabbed him trying to lecture him about what he should or shouldn't do. That's why Wu Erbai didn't even try anything like this and let him do whatever he needed to do and equally lead the mission in Reboot. And why the scene where Wu Xie 'commands' "Xiaoge, come back" and he immediately listens holds another special place in my heart. Bc he NEVER and I mean NEVER allows such things to ANYONE.

So here I came to a point of why despite loving them both dearly, my favorite Xiaoge is Huang Junjie.

I have this dissonance with Yuliang's version when to me in many scenes it felt like he and Wu Xie are the same age. Like if he was Xiaoge, but in his 20s. In his interactions with Chen Wenjin the dynamics was turned upside down, with him being okay with her telling him what to do and just in general the way she behaved with him. Same as like I didn't always quite believe him to be on par with older generation or even Pangzi, it just felt like he was truly younger than them. Some scenes that I do find extremely cute just don't fit book Xiaoge at all, I'm talking about some moments like his face when Wu Xie gave him food, or him pouting and many things he's done, when you were going "uwu he's a baby". He just never gives me this feeling in the books ever, not just bc he's 100 years old, but sad fact here.. bc he's simply unable to behave that way. Like in the books you'll desperately want to shower him with love, but he's just... I can't quite explain, it's very sad.

I guess it's just you know these characters, who are like hundreds years old, but look like they're 18? I think you have to be very careful with how you write those, so you could deliver that. And in UN because of some changed dynamics and scenes I straight up forgot about it, until Wu Xie threw some joke like "he's an old man" in front of a restaurant.

In Reboot Xiaoge could make Wu Erbai stutter with one move, put Yuliang's version in the same scene, I just don't think it would've worked. Like I'm trying to imagine him telling UN's Wu Erbai what to do and having troubles already haha. Same as I don't think he's capable to be genuinely mad at Wu Xie, and HJJ nailed it esp in one of my fav when Wu Xie was laughing at Pangzi's joke about him catching cold. The look he gave him and how ZYL just retreated was priceless xD. And boy could Qiling get angry with him in the books!

Otherwise I didn't have any drastic fall outs there, like with Joseph's Wu Xie and Ah Ning's death, because that was just too much of a difference, but there were still moments where it was once again this the same scene completely different emotion thing. He was more tolerable to ppl in general here, more pliable. And 50% of the time he gave me the cute lost kitten type, which I just cannot connect with the feeling he gave me in the books. His personality is a cat type 100%, but like seriously "cute baby" is the last word combination I would ever apply to book Xiaoge, but with Yuliang's version it's easily applied. So small bean he is indeed. With Joseph and in UN it works incredibly perfect to me, but the way he is in UN is at times too gentle. And there are lots of scenes where Joseph himself looked at him in a way "you're too cute, let me pinch your cheeks" kind of way, or the way he like sat down next to him on the coast, he was a bit babying him at times. I can't imagine book pingxie doing that. It's just a whole different vibe, the way he takes care of him, the way he lets him take care of him... it's...uuuuuuuuu another vibe (see, I'm so good at explaining lmao).

It's also kinda funny to me, bc HJJ who's the smallest and who irl truly a kitten never once gave me that feeling on screen for some reason. The one babied and loved by every crew and old ppl, who was cutely hiding behind ZYL's back on set, who won't sue an ex who almost ruined his career bc of how stupid she is, bc he "didn't want to hurt her", who according to staff can't even step on a fly, whom CMH was petting for several minutes after he had to hit him with a prop brick bc he didn't wanna do it lmao. I was just like.. ok, this is hilarious, bc I in fact didn't expect him to be a small bean, so watching all the bts made me go LOOOOL. Probably ZYL acting like a 3 year old helped him transform and the age difference problem got lost lmao

As for other adaptations. You know I can't watch seriously "Lost Tomb", I think some ppl probably have some nostalgic feeling about it, but I'm sorry, to me it's fucking hilarious. Like I've already said it looks like some type of twilight parody thing or smth. Soft damselle Wu Xie esp killed me, bc 1st when he ever was that, 2nd in the first book he's salty af, I don't even know this dude in this interpretation, I was like who's this. YangYang I know him from other things, I really don't think it's his role. I know the script and everything is bad. I know the costume and hair are horrendously funny, but it's just I was watching him in those action scenes and was like no... just I'm sorry but I'm not feeling it. I simply just don't know what to say about the whole thing seriously, bc I don't even know where to start. 10 episodes of some salad finished with one mutilated scene from book 6 for no reason the fact that characters are weird themselves also I can't quite tell, did they really just meet or they imply smth else lmao.. I'm sorry, but I do not get it.

I've given LT2 another try after finishing all the books and I've dropped it half way through, Cheng Yi wasn't even close to how I pictured Xiaoge in any aspect. He in fact didn't do anything OOC or off the book or anything, I just was like "not my Qiling". Happens sometimes.

Explore with the note you already know how I feel about this lol let's just forget.

P.S. To be fair here also maybe we should take into account the fact that some got luckier than other with "at which point" Xiaoge they're playing. Like for example, "Wrath of the Sea" and "Qingling Tree" books which is LT2 is not exactly you can say much about Qiling there, he trolls them there in the beginning (in a brilliant way that was totally lost in the adaptation) and he is there in "Wrath of Sea", but it's not the part that can make his character shine in any way, there's not much things happening there that would make you fall for him or get to know him; Yuliang grabbed the fattest piece bc it's middle several books, when they're always together and his character shines the most in terms of clues about past, opening up to Wu Xie and Pangzi, and there are many many events where you can get the picture of what kind of man he is; Huang Junjie grabbed my fav piece of utter devotion, where he's already fully and wholeheartedly belongs to Wu Xie, that I'm just weak for. So like... there's also that I guess xD.

[xhellodollyx]

The timeline of this chiffany back story in the show is very confusing. I find it hard to believe they were in Chicago less than a year before chucky was coined the lakeshore stranger and eventually caught. I seriously would've thought they loved there together for at least a few years before that, and he was killing people. Also, where's the voodoo paintings on the wall in his apartment we saw in the first movie? These continuity errors are making me crazy lol. Also tiffany always said that chucky was protective/possessive of her and I ain't seen any of that lol. & she said they lived together for a few years. Less than a year is a few years now? Don please watch what you make for the love of God, or at least reference a Wikipedia page or cliff notes for fucks sake. These things just seem so basic & simple to me. Jfc! I'm grateful for what we have and don't mean to be a bitch but lord.

Literally though!! I 10000% agree with everything you said. I worry that don is backtracking on Chucky and Tiffany's relationship so that way its easier in canon to have them end up separating for good (with chucky killing tiffany again for some reason and then she stays away from him for good). Its just so weird for him to backtrack on their relationship when, like you pointed out, they lived together for years and how he was so possessive. They so clearly loved each other in Bride and Seed, even with all their problems aside, and even at the end of Cult, so why would Don want to completely change that? Its like... everyone has been wanting flashbacks of them for years and we have seen no real development between them at all in those flashbacks, just them killing together and tiffany being upset he stopped killing with her, like thats it? 🤨 i think my whole problem with it is like... yes, we've established they both like killing and thats their thing and they both love doing it, but is that all they really have going for each other? Just their love of killing? Nothing more? It just seems so one-sided and, dare i say, one dimensional. Chucky when he was human seemed to be a killer on the side but also a thief in order to make money without ever having to work, because lets be real, that would never work out for him, lol. With how much killing he's been doing and with Tiffany too, you would think they both would have been caught and WAY sooner. And instead he was caught for kidnapping sarah?? Like what?

And from interviews I've seen with Brad and Jen, they definitely seem to have a better idea on what Chucky and Tiffany's relationship should be. I'd have to go back and rewatch the interviews they've done over the years, but apparently, the recent one I've seen for the show, both Brad and Jennifer were surprised by the changes made to the characters in the show. Which to me is not a good sign. Retconning the voodoo aspect in Bride (with the Heart of Damballah) i could totally get passed, and throwing Jennifer into the series was probably the best thing Don could have added, and that's why Bride and Seed will always be in my top 3 favorites of the series for that reason. The show has done an amazing job with representation, with the character development of each of the main human characters, and basically on every other front except for Chucky and Tiffany. I dont think im alone in thinking that. I love the show for all those other aspects but i just wish the backstories were done better and the relationship was done better, and their characters overall.

[topsytervy]

New Years with Rafe

Just a little post about Rafe and you on New Years that I whipped up cause my lonely ass will be sat on the couch with a pizza next to my dog as I rewatch JackSepticEyes Little Nightmares playthrough instead of cuddled on the couch with a gentlemen non-canon Rafe.

Warnings: mentions of drinking, swearing, poorly edited so probably spelling errors, if you haven't watched All Dogs Go To Heaven small spoiler for it but not big enough to spoil the entire movie I think, and I think thats it.

Word Count: 1,089

Blurb: you spend New Years Eve with Rafe instead of going out and partying cause you two want to keep people safe. No shade. Just facts.

~~~~~

You and Rafe Cameron had been best friends for as long as you could remember. You were only a year younger than him and just graduated high school, heading off to college a couple months later before COVID and Rafe ended up moving with you.

"I don't know, Y/N. You living in an apartment alone or in a dorm with a stranger just doesn't sit right with me." He told you honestly as you packed your things.

"What? You wanna move with me and away from all your loyal subjects?" You joked, adding a little bow to it. 

"Yeah. Why not? Besides New Years will be boring if you're not here to almost flash everyone at a party and I stop you just in time." He grinned.

You smacked him. "It was once and it was windy, Cameron." He laughed, grabbing a pillow to act as a shield. "But if you're so worried about me, I wouldn't mind a familiar face around 24/7 even if it's an annoying one." 

Rafe stood up and clapped his hands. "Then it's settled."

However, New Years parties were on hold (well, supposed to be on hold but you know how some people are) due to COVID. 

"You were right about New Years being boring." You mustered through a yawn as you sat on the couch, curled up under a blanket as you and Rafe watched TV. A wine cooler sat between you two and you reached for the bottle, refilling your glass before refilling Rafes. "I think I'm going to turn in early. 2020 doesn't deserve a nice send off. It deserves a fuck you, get out, and never come back or I'll get a restraining order against you." You went to stand up but Rafe grabbed your hand.

Rafe checked the watch on his wrist. "Five more minutes. Just five. You made it this far, Y/N/N. What's five more?"

You blinked at him and he stuck out his bottom lip, pouting at you.

You rested your head on his shoulder and sighed. "Fine. But if I fall asleep, you have to carry me to bed." 

"Fine by me. Wouldn't be the first or the last time I do."

It was so much easier to stay awake when you were away from your bed and surrounded by strangers and loud music.  You and Rafe decided on a childhood movie marathon to help keep you two awake but it wasn't really helping. Rafe wanted to watch All Dogs Go To Heaven despite it always making you cry. And crying would only fuel the sleepiness.

"I really don't wanna go into the New Year crying." You mumbled as he put the disc in. 

"I have so much confidence that this is the time that you won't let tears fall." Rafe reassured you.

"Yeah. Wait until we get towards the end then my heart will crack and the tears will fall."

Now here you were watching Anne-Marie hearing everything Charlie was saying that would lead to her running out and getting kidnapped. 

"The tears are coming." You whispered, feeling your throat tighten as you held back sobs.

Rafe wrapped and arm around you. "She just got taken and they're about to tell everyone. This isn't even the saddest bit."

"It's just the sense of all the dogs, even Itchie who was pretty cold to Anne-Marie, are all spreading the word and willing to do anything to protect this little girl that half of them didn't even meet." The tears began to fall as you spoke.

"Okay, okay. I see your point. Maybe this was a bad movie to watch." Rafe rubbed your arm. 

"It hurts so much worse when you lose a pet cause it's like 'wow, my pet was exactly like that with me. Willing to do anything to protect me', ya know. It just fucking hurts man." You blubbered.

"Want me to turn it off?"

"No."

"Alright. I'll pause it when we hit 15 seconds to midnight. Sound good?"

You nodded, sniffling as you tried to calm yourself down. Rafe reached for the box of tissues on the end table and grabbed some for you.

"Thank you, bub."

"You're welcome, Y/N/N."

The time came a couple of minutes later to pause the movie and begin the countdown, you had composed yourself for the countdown and Rafe nodded.

"10...9...8…"

You brought the blanket closer around yourself as you two counted down.

"3...2...1… Happy New Year!" You two cheered. Rafe reached onto the floor and grabbed the bottle of champagne he had purchased, opening it and pouring some for you both.

You two linked your arms and brought the glasses to your mouth, chugging the beverage before unlinking your arms from each other. 

"To getting through 2020 together." You grinned.

"And to going into 2021 together but in a different way." Rafe added before grabbing your face and bringing his lips to yours.

You paused for a second before wrapping your arms around his neck and kissing back, pulling him impossibly closer.

Rafe pulled away first, grabbing the champagne and refilling your glasses. You kept an arm around his neck, a hand playing with his hair as you held your glass in the other.

"How'd you know, Cameron? I thought I was pretty good at keeping my crush on you secret." You asked, taking a sip from your glass.

"Oh yeah. If I wouldn't have found your journal and read it while I was waiting for you to get home one day after you graduated, I wouldn't have known at all about your little crush. You really don't flirt much, huh?"

You smacked him, mouth agape. "You read my journal?"

"Okay, underneath random books on your desk is a shit hiding place for a journal. Hide it in your underwear drawer or something. Literally anywhere else is a better hiding place than where you had it." He laughed.

You rolled your eyes. "Just unpause the movie so we can finish it and go to sleep, Rafe."

"As long as I get to sleep with you in your room tonight."

"Your room is warmer. I wanna sleep in there."

"Then we'll sleep in my room." Rafe grinned as he kissed the top of your head and resuming the movie.

"Now I have an excuse to crawl into your bed at 2 AM when I can't sleep and want your body heat."

"You never needed an excuse to come cuddle with me, sunshine. You just didn’t know it." 

~~~~~~~

[chat-noir-always-here]

I rewatch Miraculous—The Bubbler

Okay here we go time to dive back into French Sailor Moon aww hell yeee

(J.K. I’ve never sat through a single episode of SM in ma life)

•Tikki’s face when Mari is trying to kiss the Adrien collage wallpaper is low-key funny

•plagg lacks toe beans

•how do you “accidentally” come across your childs emails when cleaning their room? Mari’s mama is devious.

•Adrien is that a cookie keeping your breakfast crescents company? Just like Adrien to have cookies for breakfast.

•Adrien’s pained expression after Nathalie tells him happy birthday😭😭😭poor cinammon roll child

•nino: “You’d think he at least remembers to be young and wanna party a little!”

Adrien: “No Im pretty sure he was a downer back then too.”

LOL roast him, Adrien. Here Gabriel have some ice for that burn.

•Why does Nino’s shirt remind me of Goofy’s Monsters inc. appearance from Kingdom Hearts 3?

• “Am i seeing what I think I’m seeing? Dont tell me its Adriens birthday!” Girl you been his friend since childhood you cant remember it on your own?

• “Dont be a pushover! Literally!” Yeah that goes for Sabrina and Adrien too. You two let Chloe do whatever she wants with you? Yeesh.

• “Ring the doorbell.” Yeah for real ring the doorbell thats what its there for. 🙄🙄🙄

•Mari been forgetting to sign notes since episode one

Facepalms

•Bitch please you cant buy your own son a birthday present instead of bullying Nathalie into stealing Mari’s???

•that fucking painting hanging on the wall right where the staircase in Agreste Mansion forks. Can we just... Can we just burn that painting? Reduce it to fucking ashes. Seriously how can people look at it and not call the French CPS that piece of “art” is the most distubring piece of possessive B.S. i have ever had the displeasure of seeing. My brain hates my eyes for seeing it every time its visible in the show

•Im sorry Nino. Im sorry this dumbass bitch said that to you. (For real tho were you expecting anything different?)

•”Adults ruin everything all the time.” Kiddo your about four-five years from being an adult maybe check yourself

•for real check yourself cuz Gabriel is an ass and said that to you just so he could akumatize you

WORST.

PARENT.

EVER!!!

•i havent played with bubble wands since i was like ten. Are tbey more popular in Paris or is it just Nino’s thing?

•Nino’s akumatized form is so ridiculous, still. First time around it nearly drove me away from this show.

•something else i found ridiculous first time around is bubbling the adults. Its a bit more frightening though when you think about how they only have so much air in their bubble. If LB and CN failed to free them they would have all suffocated to death and Paris would be populated solely by orphans.

•LB you seriously just gonna entrust a couple of kiddos to a stranger? I know you dont really have a lot of options but still. If this were a crime drama or a D.C. movie those kids might not have faired as well.

•”Wow. That was a birthday lunch break to remember. Yaaay.” Kiddo you sound so sarcastic i love it. 🤣🤣🤣

•that little pompom or whatever the hell on top of akumatized Nino’s head jiggles a little every time his head moves and im just. Ugh. Cmon couldnt they have given him a better outfit or at least something less uncomfortable????

•Plagg is literally that little devil Kronk from “The Emperors New Groove” that sits on Kronk’s shoulder and tells him to do bad things. Or in this case, sits on Adrien’s shoulder and tells him to do bad things. “Its fiiiiine shirk your responsibilities for a hot minute and dance with your buddies. Its not like theyre here under suspicious circumstances or anything.”

•Adrien, honey, if you dont want her to kiss you you should say something. I mean i get cheek kisses mean something different in France but Adrien looks really uncomfortable.

•MAAAARRRIIII you just wasted a good deal of transformation time in a fit of jealousy for what i wish i could say was the first and last time 😩😩😩

•Tikki being a good guide and scolding Mari 🙏🙏🙏

•ugh are those storebought cookies? I can practically taste those things. I hope for Tikki’s sake they’re homemade or at least warmed up.

•”You were right Tikki i never should have waited this long.” In other words you shouldve fixed the problem the first time around not wasted your transformation in a fit of jealousy like you did? Correct.

•upon hearing the truth from LB, Adrien immediatley runs off to transform. Good boi didnt know how serious the situation was, is all.

•that look LB gives CN after her yoyo bounces off his head. Giirrrrrl he boyfriend material you knoooowww itttt admit itttt~~~~

• “Kids need adults!” The way Mari says this makes her sound like such a goody two shoes, i really cant stand it for some reason. Oof am i channeling Lila?

wipes my hand on a towel then throws towel away

• LB: “Adults keep children safe and protected! They care for their kids, they love them!”

CN: “Most adults do anyhow.”

Behold the difference between their respective households summed up in two seconds. Poor Kitty boi....😿😿😿😿

•Aww the way LB is hugging her kitty as he tries to kick at it ❤️❤️❤️

• “couldnt you have said that 500 feet ago?” Sarcastic chat noir is wonderful

• LB: “we cant stay stuck in this bubble together forever!”

CN: flirty looks

In other words theres something they could do together in their bubble.

asdfghjkl🤣🤣🤣

•the kids’ bubbles look smaller than the adults bubbles. So they are more cramped and have less air. Unfair much?

• “pound it!” Theres a joke in there but i wont. F.Y.I. In French they say something like “good job” so the joke is lost in that version teehee

•”did my son like his gift?” Again bitch PICK IT OUT YOURSELF

• “hey nice scarf Adrien! Off the chain!” Alya honey where DO you get your phrasing from? The late nineties?

• “can you believe my dad got this for me? Its so awesome he’s given me the same lame pen for three years in a row.” What the hell kinda parent gives their child a flipping pen for his birthday??? F.Y.I. In French Adrien says that his father forgets his birthday every year and gives him nothing.

Annnnnnd that wraps up episode one. Ill do episode two some other time.

[bucksbisexual]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAA OKAY LAST ONE OF MY OPINION POSTS HERE GOES EP12:

[breathes in]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

i’m so fucking happy with this ending

it’s such a good happy ending this is truly what the gays deserve i’m just happiness in physical form rn

i don’t even know where to start but i’ll try to make this as chronological as my brain allows me because my memory do be sucking

i’m gonna put a keep reading because this shit will get loooooong kjshfkf okay let’s do this

so.. we start with PETE EXPOSING NON(T)’S BRAT ASS!!!!!!!!!! FUCK YES THATS MY BABY THATS MY BOY!!!!!!!!!!

kao’s mom being a fucking badass and telling her BOSS how to do shit. i love her yall I LOVE HERRRRRRRR

also kao’s mom telling kao that she wasn’t the most amazing person ever was so cute because you can see kao’s light bulb turning on sjfkhsgsh please i love them

yes i will say i love x after every single one of these u can’t stop me

from the teaser i thought kao would dashi run run run to pete’s house but thankfully he took a taxi lmao

at least he didn’t run there because he had to run from pete’s house (or may i say, mansion) to the POOL my man is a whole athlete oh my god

KAO YELLING HE LOVES PETE!!!!!!!!!!! IN THE MIDDLE OF A CLOSED SPACE WITH PEOPLE IN IT!!!!!!!!!!!! AND HE DOESN’T GIVE A FUCK IF THEY HEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THATS CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT BABYYYYYYYY

also a beautiful parallel to the scene from ep1 (i noticed there’s a lot of parallels in this episode we stan character development and repeating things just so the viewers can see how consistent the couples are)

the kiss from that scene............... beautiful amazing gorgeous idk many words in english to describe how i felt while watching and how i feel about it

to that i think we cut to sunmork but i don’t remember what happened because of the kiss KJHFKSL SORRY

anygays i rlly like how this whole episode is sun being a clingy bih and mork gay panicking while trying to act like a confident gay when he knows that sun outconfidentgays him i love them lmao

okay after that i think it’s petekao having food with their parents all together and god i looooooove this scene

pete’s dad being the lgbt ally dad all of us lgbt fellas with homo/transphobic dads wish we had will never fail to make me soft i love that man pls be my dad too

also kao’s mom :-(( i love her she respected her son’s decision on not coming out until he was ready even though she already smelled it (reminds me of my mom lmao) and was always there for him even when kao didn’t say anything :-(((((((((((

petekao bickering will never get old i swear i love every time they do because that’s so..... men it makes their characters more real

i know there’s a lot (not that much because i admit this episode was kinda short?? idk maybe it’s just me) between that scene and this one but THE SQUAD EATING ALL TOGETHER AGAIN!!!!!!!! AND THEM TEASING PETEKAO!!!!!! PLEASE I LOVE THEM

pete literally not knowing how to stop the audio and broadcasting live TO THE WHOLE COUNTRY that time when he told kao he loved him through the teddy bear...... peak pete culture

the fact that ppl love them and they have a whole hashtag on twitter makes me soft because usually when someone is famous in bls the fans hate the other part of the couple but in this one??? oh no honey we stan petekao in this household hate is not allowed it’s actually prohibited illegal

okay let me backtrack a bit skjfhsjf

OH YES I FORGOT!!!! manow wanting to talk with mork was so weird when i saw the teaser for the episode but after seeing them talk i was like oooooh okay i understand

sun saying “what’s your girl saying to my boy” is probably one of my favourite lines of this drama KLHSJFLF

rain reading their lips fskjfjsf and when mork said “fuck you rain” HIS FACE SKJFHKSJSLFJ HE WAS SCARED SHITLESS but also the end of this scene was so cute i love these three

i just did a bit of skipping through the episode to try and actual make an order out of this mess and the petekao+parents thing comes now,,,,,, anygaYS

then it’s more teasing between sunmork blah blah

then MORK SPEAKING THE MF TRUTH!!!!!!!!!!!!! quoting the actual dialogue “it’s my choice to tell or not tell anyone. i should get to decide”

OUTING SOMEONE ISN’T COOL!!!!!!! IT’S NOT OKAY!!!!!!!!!!! NO LGBT PERSON WILL EVER WANT TO BE OUTED!!!!!!!!!!!!! DON’T DO THAT SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

rain had good intentions but it doesn’t mean that it was right of him to do so

okay this got serious,, sun going to rain’s bed with not one but Two pillows when barely two people fit in that bed.... oh to be that iconic and carelessly gay

back to petekao because we will never get enough of these two (which is why i’ll probably watch the our skyy episode tomorrow just to cry over these fools)

it’s so weird to see tay being like this after watching him being himself in other things like the live lunch and taynew meal date and other things i’ve randomly watched during this week to retain myself from finishing this series in a night ksfjhsfkshlks

also kao helping pete shave and pete being like do u like my moustache or should i shave it for u my lord SFHKFJ the domesticity and just the feeling of two idiots being in love i love them with my whole heart

kao staying at pete’s house because it’s both of their first days as interns and kao!!!!! he works for pete’s dad!!!!!!! pete’s dad accepted him into his company!!!!!! i love them

also the bickering between those three sjfkhs “hello im pete im from thailand” “that’s all you’ll say today” THAT WAS SO FUNNNY SKJFHSKFHSFJSFL

THE MESSAGE IN THE TEDDY BEAR !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! KAO CALLING PETE LOVE PLEASE IM GONNA CRYYYYYYYYYYYY I LOVE THESE FOOLS

okay so the squad eating together is right after this but i already talked about it ksjfhsfh next!!

idk if it’s a big time skip or a small one but guess what!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MANOW AND RAIN ARE DATING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MY STRAIGHT BABIES YES I LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUU AAAAAAAAAAAAA

manow is so pretty and rain is so cute they’re both so lucky my bisexual ass is crying

pete being “angry” at kao being so handsome,,, a mood

but also.. pete being possessive was h*t

there i said it and i don’t regret it

random but i will miss kao’s annoying ass saying “about aboyz” sjfkhsfh

pete being like “i will have to give u more love bites (ffs gmmtv just say hickies we are all at an age where we know what love bites are) so no one flirts with u” and kao being like “bitch try me” sjfhksfj i’m loving bratty kao

also that scene turned into furry kao real quick KJHDKJFSHJF

okay now it’s: mork’s birthday party time!!

rain and manow arrive first and are the cutest couple around because the two main gays haven’t arrived yet (being gay AND punctual? not possible)

sun and rain fighting in the kitchen was peak siblings culture skfhksjf

mork being ready to leave his own birthday party with a stranger who also plays pokemon go just to have a battle................ dumbass bisexual energy

said stranger is eARN FROM 2GETHER!!!!!! FILM IS IN THIS TOO!!!!!!!! first the girl who plays yuri in yyy and now film who plays earn in 2gether is here too??? damn wlw keep winning (also headcanon: theyre dating/seeing each other because LESBIANS periodt)

okay petekao arrive and wont u guess whats their present for mork,,,,,, the mf TEDDY BEAR and kao rlly says that they should use it since theyre so lip sealed lmao

rain and manow literally gave mork a present not for him but for sun im- i love these two

MORK FINALLY SAID YES TO BEING BOYFRIENDS OH MY GOD DUDE U ACTUALLY HAD ME WORRIED THERE FOR A SEC

also sun being a whole koala and being a horny bitch is so funny sfhskfjskl my man has his priorities set

their last scene is so cute :-(( poor rain will have to live with this until he moves out sjfhksjf

oh boi the ending is near hhhhhhh

kao teaching his class an equation that ends up in i < 3 u is the most kao thing i’ve ever seen

also kAO IS BOOKED AND BUSY BABYYYYYYYYYY GET THOSE COINS HONEY

pete being like “u haven’t spent enough time with me lately >:-(” was cute jhkfjs my man is needy of kao and i understand that because have u seen kao? exactly

kao teasing him with not having forgotten the cup this time and pete being his possessive self was.. splendid

every reference to something that happened with non(t) hurts but also i love how they just tease each other because they know that now their relationship is stronger than it’s ever been and that nothing and no one will come between them

the scenes they show during the last last scenes :-((( BOYFIES!!!!!!

and i love how they decided to end the show with them holding hands in public

i would explain why i do but it’s 6:26 am and i’ve been writing this for at least half an hour already and my laptop is heating up a lot and im sweating because it’s hot in here so get down on the floor pipiipipipipipipi

kdjhkdfhs sorry im not sleepy this is just my brain without a filter it’s just gay shit and a big repertoire of songs

god okay that was my opinion on the last episode of dark blue kiss...........

needless to say that i will eat every bit of content related to petekao after this because writing this i already miss them and i can’t wait to watch our skyy tomorrow idk where but i will

i really really REALLY liked this drama and it’s one of the two bl dramas (not counting the untamed) i’ve given a full 10/10 rating on mdl because it’s THAT good

everything about this drama is just.. chef’s kiss i love it i will probably rewatch it when my plan to watch is empty but it’s a pretty long list so.. hopefully i’ll ignore that and just rewatch sjkfhslf

i’ll of course watch kiss and kiss me again just for the petekao, the squad and rain scrumbs because i’m sure that the petekao compilations don’t show everything

but yeah im just.. i love this show it’s been a rlly long time since i started writing this but i’m still happy because it’s so good and truly gave us a good happy ending and i swear i cannot emphasise enough how important good happy endings in lgbt media are!!!!!!!!!!

anygays im hungry and ready to submerge myself in the dbk tags, see u all tomorrow for my our skyy petekao episode version of this,,,,,

till then, stay safe ! bYE

[maplestreetsims]

So ik your a sims blog but you've mentioned you like stranger things and I recently started writing a Steve fic and I'm like 20k words and I just really wanted to tell someone but none of my friends really care about stranger things (I'm proud of myself because I've never written this much before but Steve harrington just does that to me I guess)

Thats so cool!! i could never write anything even close to 20k rip, i love stranger things dsjskds im so hyped for the new season im really thinking about rewatching the first two bc why tf not alsO i used to read so many 1d fics when i was younger lmao, they shaped me into the attempt of a person that i am today

[dylanobrienisbatman]

Rewatch: Episode 1x10, I Am Become Death

Some of our best commentary from our rewatch!

Episode 1x10: AKA Raven Reyes is the most badass character ever in the history of time.

During the “previously on” it had Clarke banishing Murphy, and like... remind us again why anyone thought Murphy would be on Clarke’s side in s6??

Also a pre-episode ‘we hate Finn’ because it’s just too easy. 

Bellamy being constantly annoyed with Finn is a whole mood

THIS IS THE EPISODE WHERE MURPHY COMES BACK!! 

ALSO first ever Harper McIntyre appearance!!!! 

Jasper is a major dickhead in this episode wow 

Murphy, sweet asshole garbage son. 

Bri forgot Harper was dead for a minute, making us all sad. 

Finn saves Murphy from Bellamy... his one good moment this episode.... Well he has another later in the episode but whatever 

Bellamy is like “he claims to have been with the grounders” like... Bellamy... Baby. Do you SEE him? 

Clarke is like “he was tortured” babe... YOU banished him. 

Elyse had to google if fingernails grow back... what a weird show we watch y’all 

Clarke: “We get info out of him, and then we can kill him” Y’all: “John Murphy Clarke Griffin #1 Fan!!” 

The first ever Marper scene, where Jasper is a dick to Harper, and Monty is under a blanket the whole time.... true love 

Monty is the best, he has no problem calling Jasper out 

Jasper is an UBER dick

This is one of the best episodes of s1 honestly 

Bellamy is such a dick, we all love him. Our rude son. 

Bell is such a stressed out big bro when he finds out Octavia might be sick 

And then he’s a douche to Octavia, because our boy is nothing if not consistent 

Someone needs to hug Bellamy for like 4 straight days (we all volunteered, we’re gonna do it in shifts) 

A brief discussion of how s1/s2 are the only seasons where we liked Octavia 

Lincoln deserved better, boy shoulda just ran off to the sea, found Luna, and gotten away from his Garbage Fire Girlfriend 

BELLARKE DUMB FLIRTING WHY IS S1 GIVING US BELLARKE FEELS AGAIN 

Bellamy is such a grump, he just pops that dude in the face with the butt of that gun 

Clarke is such a badass in s1 

Raven should just punch Finn and leave him tbh, he’s such an ass 

Zeke needs to show up already, Raven needs love 

Clarke and Finn talk about how she knows him... you lied and cheated.. bruh she doesn’t know you that well. Thats sort of the point. 

Harper’s cute little headband, i love her. A little badass. 

Raven is such a badass, best character ever created hands down. 

We were all saying we wanted to be Raven when we grow up, but then Elyse mentioned she might be too in love with her to want to be here... which is a good point. 

Bellamy is such a NERD 

Blood dripping from the nose makes everyone think of Stranger Things. Bellamy is the new 011. 

Murphy is like “oh byegones bruh we good” you LIAR. YOU ARE DEF GONNA SUFFOCATE THAT KID LATER. 

Bellamy is sick, and wants no one to touch him... boy you need a hug more than ever rn 

Monty is a fucking SAVAGE. 

Raven is the most badass bitch in the whole fucking world. She sees Finn hesitate and is just like “Fuck it, ill do it myself” and then she gets sick and is like “welp, im gonna die, might as well make sure the job gets done lets do this im gonna trek through the woods bleeding from MY LITERAL EYEBALLS to get this done” LIKE HOLY FUCK. A MORE BADASS CHARACTER HAS NEVER EXISTED IN THE HISTORY OF TIME. 

Bellamy is a petty bitch, and as petty bitches ourselves, we love him 

The war drums make the whole scene where Raven is carrying the bomb to the bridge and setting it up even more intense 

Girl was ready to just BLOW UP to save everyone god what an ICON 

She really thought no one was gonna come for her baby girl you ARE THE MOST IMPORTANT CHARACTER I PROMISE 

Monty showing up to save the day and support Jasper even after he was a dick is the DEFINITION of a good friend moment

SO much nerd flirting, s1 Bellarke is prime. 

Bellamy is like “oh WAIT shes a NERD?!” 

Ohhh another mention of Mountain Men!!

RUN AWAY LINCOLN. RUN AWAY. 

Okay but Luna/Lincoln could have easily been a great couple 

Okay Clarke looks super jealous when Finn is carrying Raven into the camp, like... girl... dont be shitty. 

This love triangle is fucking stupid though. 

When will Finn just DIE though

Raven breaking up with Finn is such an iconic moment. 

WHERE IS ZEKE THOUGH WHERE 

Murphy pauses for just a SECOND when he’s about to kill Connor, like he doesn’t want to be a killer, but he does it anyway 

That moment on the original watch was EPIC. Like I believed him, and we were all just... proven so wrong

I mean... they did try to hang him. 

Sick Bellarke Flirting is so cute augh. S1 and S4 had the best bellarke content 

Kills: Grounders - 1 Murphy - 1 Attempts: 0

“How many times did we talk about hating Finn” Tally: 7 

Countdown to Finn’s Death: 17 days, 11 Episodes

How many times did we talk about Raven being the best character ever: 16

Countdown till Raven meets Zeke: 6 years 6 months and 5 days, 54 episodes.

@raven-reyes-of-sunshine @granger–danger

[jewelsunrays]

Its been a while since I posted in my diary. I’ve been quite busy, and been doing quite poorly the last few days. Even though the sole intention of a diary was to write in it whenever I felt downcast for some reason I haven’t been succeeding. It just seems like a chore to write lots of paragraphs on my phone; I wish I had a keyboard.

Dad’s pension came in though, a few days back, so mum says I can get a laptop soon for school with some of the money he left. I would prefer to buy myself a Macbook, I told mum this myself, but she never listens so we’ll see how that works out. I told her about wanting to get rid of my TV yet she proceeded to buy another one with the money dad left? In my opinion it was a fucking waste. What the hell am I supposed to do now. Why does nobody in this house have a sense of priority or just generally not listen to me?

I went to see Mitski (and Harry Styles) in concert a few days after my last entry. The heat was excruciating, and everyone there had such nice outfits that I felt really insecure about the way I looked. When Mitski came on it took everything in me to not cry too loudly, but at the beginning of every song I was sobbing. Embarrassing considering I felt like I was the only person there listening to the opening act, bar these two girls I saw in the crowd that were dancing their hearts out (I loved them, I hope in another life I was friends with them). When Harry Styles came on obviously I wasn’t as interested but he was funny and a few of his songs were good so despite my complaining and typical stoic exterior I was having a good time those two days.

Concerts stress me out because I always feel obligated to be screaming and laughing and crying and just openly showing my enjoyment by being loud. Thats really not me. I don’t tend to show my emotions that way, even when I’m screaming with excitement on the inside I will be sat still and straight-faced on the outside and I’m afraid people will perceive it as me being bored or annoyed, when in reality I’m just not a very exuberant person.

Umbrella Academy season3 and Stranger Things V2 dropped. I have liked a great many shows more than I like Stranger Things, its not very high up on my list of favourites despite me being a fan. But I swear I’ve never reacted to any death the way I reacted to Eddie’s/Max’s. At movies and other shows I will have sat there shocked and sad obviously, maybe crying gently if its really heartbreaking, but I’ve never really openly bawled and screeched the way I did at that. I dunno, I think the anticipation of it, and watching it live, and seeing it at the same time as everyone else in the world and not having it spoiled made it so much sadder as opposed to everything else I watch where its already been out for years and I know whats happened. Sole exception to this is Doctor Who. But Christ almighty every time I see a clip or screenshot of Eddie laying there I feel sick to my stomach and have to scroll quickly, that’s never happened even with characters I cared more about. I assume this is how my mother feels about Eleven’s regeneration. I don’t think I could rewatch this if I tried to.

28th June was my interview as I believe I’ve mentioned a great many times. I wore my smartest clothes, fretted for ages while frantically googling what questions I’ll be asked and rehearsing my answers, only for it to be a five minute interview with one teacher, many other people in the same room being ‘interviewed’ at the same time, just to go over exam stuff. All they needed to know was if I’ve already done my GCSE’s, if I had extra time, whether I studied at another sixth form before, my exam scores, stuff like that. I think it would’ve been more complicated had I not already done my GCSE’s. Alas all that happened that mattered was the man taking a glance at my scores and saying, ‘oh you should be fine to get in to the lessons you want with those scores, just bring that to enrolment in August, you’ll receive an email’ which by the way, I haven’t yet. So yeah, I have to go back again, jesus christ.

The last few days have been completely terrible. I feel so hopelessly lonely despite having friends. I’ve realised that the people who feel comfortable coming to me with their problems will often do so without asking if I’m even emotionally stable for that. Worse, I can’t even go to them for the same thing, you know? Like I’ve realised whenever I talk to them the way they talk to me, I don’t receive the same energy back, they wouldn’t listen or try help the same way I would try to do with them - it just gets brushed aside, dismissed with a ‘damn’ or ‘same’ or some other shit like that. I dunno. It never really affected me before but now I’m just realising that I feel like I have absolutely no true friends. Everything in me wants to leave the friends I’ve got when they haven’t even done anything wrong, they’re technically nice to me, but talking to them makes me feel miserable and I don’t even know why. I dunno. I want a therapist or something.

I will try to write in here more consistently. The whole intention was to vent here as nobody else was listening but alas somehow I forgot that

[artisticdagger]

All

CrACKS KNUCKLES

Alright boys. Time to feel some Halloween finally tonight.

Boogeyman: what’s your weirdest/most irrational fear?

I. am so fucking terrified of Balloons. I love them but i never want one near me or within my field of view. Party Stores are so much fun but i spend the whole time thinking about the balloon blowing station in them

Candy Corn: what’s the best Halloween candy? the worst?

The best are those fucking Jolly Rancher Sticks hands down, the fact you get a plank of hard candy gets me, but I wont say no to any of those small packaged sour patch kids either. Something about them being in small doses that just. Warms my soul. Worst? Tie between Licorice and pretzels for sure. Thats just radiating I Hate Fun. 

Crow: do you believe in omens? which ones?

Yes but more obvious ones. Like a black cat ain’t scaring me off or nothing. But for example. I was driving home from a late night class. My windows were fogged up no matter how much i tried to get them cleared up, meaning it was hazy as hell. It had been pouring rain, so the streets were flooded up, Vultures cover my campus. Merging onto a highway with foggy smeared windshield, reflecting puddles all over the place trying to determine what was headlights and what was reflecting, my fav radio station, which only EVER plays hard alternative music, suddenly started playing this slow, soft, sad song about someone dying in memory of the radio host’s dead dog? And all i could think was that this is how tragic backstories start where the movie flashbacks to how this important person died. Needless to say. I took it real slow going home. 

Exorcist: do you believe in demons?

Oh fuck yeah. Maybe less in a biblical sense, although still stemming from a place of that for sure of like. Evil Entities probably from Darker Dimensions. Probably get confused as Evil Ghosts which i think dont really exist honestly, i think most Evil Ghosts are probably demons here to fuck your shit up. Souless lil fuckers here to be piss babies. 

Ghost: have you ever encountered a spirit or haunted place?

BUDDY. MY OLD HOUSE WAS HAUNTED AS FUCK. And im sure everyone says that but Do I Have Some Stories that include me asking my parents if “The Man Is Gonna Follow Us” when told i was going to go to Disney when i was like five or six. Freaked the shit out of my parents but they kinda already knew the house was haunted cause a lot of just. Freaky shit happened. It was a very old house. 

Haunted: do you like haunted houses (or corn mazes, hayrides, etc.)?  if so, what’s the scariest one you’ve participated in?

UHhhhhh no? I’m. I dont like jumpscares i have Anxiety. and most of those are people you pay to just jumpscare you. I did enjoy a few Haunted Hayrides back when i was Very Little but only the parts where people didnt come out of the forest to chase the ride with chainsaws. 

Mothman: do you know of any local urban legends, or is there an urban legend that really freaks you out?

I am not really freaked out by them but i think it’s cause the only Urban Legend that is local is the Jersey Devil? And I dont know why people are scared of him? Because he only attacks people who have a Blackened Heart? So he’s like… a good guy? The only reason you have to be scared of him is if YOU are a bad guy?

Mystery: what’s the strangest unsolved mystery that you’ve heard of?

oh shit uhhh. Strangest? God I dunno. Roswell. Maybe not the strangest but i think it’s just fucking WILD that like…. FBI people themselves have come forward to say shit about it. 

Scream: favourite horror film?

HM. horror films don’t really do it for me. I’ve watched so goddamn many. I once watched the entirety of the Saw Franchise, all like, what, 8 movies? In three days? My favorites have to be The Strangers films. Hits close to home of my weird fear of being broken into. Also my younger mind remembers watching Girl ON The Train and loving it but i’d have to rewatch it again tbh. It’s got some dark ass themes though, i do remember, so be careful if you ever check it out. 

Spell: do you believe in magic, or any sort of otherworldly powers?

Mmmmm. I dunno. Yes? I think? I believe there are people out there with them for sure but i also believe in the power of human brains and belief to just be that fuckin weird sometimes. 

Trick or Treat: do you have any plans for Halloween this year?

It fell on a wednesday when i dont have classes so i couldnt dress up to go to class. Im Too Old to go out trick or treating. I have no friends and therefore No Parties. I went out to brunch and had a therapy sessions today. Press F.

UFO: do you believe in aliens, and do you think they visit Earth?

YES. YES I DO. ONE HUNDRED AND TEN PERCENT. 

Werewolf: what cryptid or monster do you think could actually exist?

Yes.

Witches: are you going to dress up this year? if yes, as what?

I went to a lil costume party this past Sunday! I dressed up as a Warlock! Kinda? I dunno! You got discounts for wearing a witch hat at this lil town event thing so i went too ham. I’d post pics but I took None of myself. and all the others have friends who dont want their face Out There. 

[agentdammers]

Grand Torchwood Rewatch 1x11

FIRST RULE OF WEEVIL FIGHT CLUB IS NO FUCKIN HETS ALLOWED IN WEEVIL FIGHT CLUB. It’s “Combat” my dudes!!!

content warn: pisstaking, fun having, everyone is terrible, owen harper call me its been 3 weeks and you still havent called me i’ve been home every day

- god, “anti weevil spray” is such a terrible and immensely fucking funny concept. IT’S ALIEN REPELLENT JACK. you’ve acquired Alien Repellent. do they sell that on the aisle next to the ant killer, or,

- i hate how gwen abandoning rhys at the restaurant is still kind of framed as though he’s in the wrong!!! He raises his voice because he’s such a HORRIBLE UNREASONABLE boyfriend, obviously!! “Don’t ever speak to me like that.” what do you want him to do gwen, jump for fucking joy? All you’ve done is run out on him, be totally fucking absent when you Did grace him with your presence bc you’d rather not be there, and LIE to him including bringing a total stranger into your home and claiming to him that she was a relative. And that’s only the stuff he KNOWS about, that doesn’t include fucking uhhhh Cheating On Him with your obnoxious twink coworker? Get a grip!!!!!

- continuing on the topic of gwen, she’s now obviously lost to that Torchwood Stockholm Syndrome that manages to afflict every member of the team and makes them Dumb as all Shit. once you become part of torchwood, your life becomes torchwood, and you forget how to be a reasonable fucking person outside of it and not do stupid shit like keep secret alien technology to fuck around with and seemingly forget that other people have feelings and that your actions can have damaging consequences. ....but thats just my 2p.

- angry bar dude calls owen a dickhead me: ah? i see you’ve met before?

- “That’s none of my business...” TOSHIKO DOIN WHAT LITERALLY EVERYONE DOES AFTER THEY’VE ALREADY STARTED DISHING THE GOSS ON SOMEONE

- now, listen, this has been on my mind since 1x01, but who dresses the weevils? and why do they all wear overalls!!! is this ever addressed? in any of the books, or anything? do they ever explain who puts clothes on these animalistic creatures bc they dont seem like it would be something that they would do of their own volition???

- THE WAY JACK YELLS AT A MAN LAYING FACE DOWN IN A WAREHOUSE AS THOUGH HE’S JUST THERE FOR LAUGHS AND HE’S GONNA GO “AW SHUCKS, SURE BUDDY! I’LL ANSWER YOUR QUESTIONS!” IS SO FUCKING FUNNY I CANT COPE

- “If you ask me these guys are using weevils to carry out the perfect murder. No fingerprints, no traces of recognisable dna...” jack they fucking beat the dude up before they set a weevil on him. if it was a “”perfect murder”” why do some stupid bullshit like that first that would potentially cover someone in your fucking dna im shitting this Fucking Show, i tell ya

- speaking of Fucking Show: ah ! owen looks absolutely fucking plastered in foundation in the following scene in the van when gwen breaks it off with him

- WAIT ALL IS FORGIVEN, OWEN IS WEARING THAT TIGER SHIRT I LIKE

- Mark Lynch Wants Owen’s Butt Whole and THAT is what the kids call......... relatable content

- the “harper’s jellied eels” website bit is genuinely really good and funny it fuckin owns

- “Teeth like a shark.” jack harkness confirmed to have never seen a fucking shark in his life apparently if he thinks weevils teeth are owt like them

- anyone else fucked up that jack just let a weevil loose??? like how could you know that it wouldn’t run into some poor random person walking the streets and bite their face off.... but then again, tbqh, this is an extremely minor thing when you think of the scale of torchwood’s irresponsibility wrt Fucking Everything.

- Weevil tyler durden/mark emits horniness in fucking WAVES guys holy shit!! you could bottle it. sell this dudes aura as a humane alternative to rhino horn. Dude has now got owen home on the first date and immediately whips his shirt off, your boy is UNSTOPPABLE!!!!

- drinking game fans, TAKE A SHOT for another reference to something in the darkness

- though i will always Love jack being called out on terrible behaviour, there’s something about tosh saying “we would never deliberately put a human being through that!” to a weevil being beaten up thats like....... mmmmm i’m pretty sure yall have done Worse to people before though babe.... like, Pretty Sure...

- i can’t decide if the scene where gwen drugs & confesses to rhys is consciously showing that gwen is so fucking corrupted by Torchwood Stockholm Syndrome that she’ll go right ahead and do stupid immoral shit??? tbh i’ve grown so fond of rhys just bc i feel so bad for him, being lied to, cheated on and now, fucking roofied.

- O??? Baby Boy??? Baby???

- side note: makeup artists Know burn gorman looks good with a split lip, and so they run wth it (see also: pacific rim uprising)

- Ah? Did mark touch owen’s dick before they went to weevil fight club? I Think So !!!

- To be honest the funniest aspect of weevil fight club for me, apart from all of it, is that some dudes found an alien in cardiff and their immediate thought was “woah, wicked. lets punch it”

- another side note but about mark: something about his features are very...... david zayas, like a combination of him and rufus sewell but younger and buffer. h e l l o

- MARK & OWEN HAVE BOTH NOW CALLED EACHOTHER “GOOD BOY” AND HONESTLY!!!!!!!! HOLLERIN!!!!!! OH, HORNY!!!!

- owen and ianto confirmed to form their own club for Nihilistic Sad Boys Ready To Embrace Death

- LMAO WHY DOES JACK LEAVE MARK TO GET MAULED TO DEATH??? HE COULD’VE PULLED HIM OUT? HE COULD’VE SHOT THE WEEVIL AGAIN AND INCAPACITATED IT? HE COULD’VE DONE LITERALLY ANYTHING BUT HE DIDN’T, HE JUST PUT HIS GUN DOWN? god, why is he fucking l i k e  t h a t, u know??? he’s so willing to let other people outside of his own team die.

- owen sexy update: hospital owen............... sexy

- and on a final note, i do like how this episode sets up the bizarre relationship owen will have with the weevils that comes into play in s2. like its not strictly necessary i suppose because it would be explained by them perceiving owen’s unnatural living death state but also, its just kind of cool to think that it was a thing that actually existed anyway even before that.

next rewatch post with probably be a double season finale, and apart from there being time travel & the Real Jack Harkness i don’t remember a fuckin thing about how this series ended so i’m going in blind!!! wish me luck!