#and i think back fondly to the times i spent just walking around hand in hand with her

[astarsor]

oji-san!!

[below the cut] timelapse + sketch vs. rendered

[jellybonbons]

What You Need

Kenji Sato x fem!reader

CW: 18+ (mdni), sub!ken, dom!reader, established relationship, lots of pet names, pure filth, possessive behaviour, praise kink, handjob, fingering, strap-on blowjob, deep-throat, slight breath play, pegging, anal sex.

Words: 2.7k

AN: first ken fic and yes I spent my time making it visually pleasing cus why not

The Weeknd - What you need

Ken Sato radiates confidence and cockiness on screen, captivating audiences with his bold persona. However, behind closed doors, he reveals a much different side, far from the confident image people envision. Away from the spotlight, he’s just Kenji– an emotional, compassionate, and gentle guy.

After the exhausting press conference, Kenji finally retreats to his sanctuary. As he steps into his sleek, modern bedroom, the weight of the day settles on his shoulders. The room embraces a woody aesthetic, blending minimalist design with warm tones, natural textures, and soft ambient lighting that envelopes him in a calming atmosphere. Floor-to-ceiling windows frame a view of the night sky, allowing the stars to cast a serene glow inside, further enhancing the tranquil mood.

In the dimly lit room, you wait for him, lounging on his king-sized bed, dressed in a matching silk robe and nightgown, softly scrolling through your tablet. With your presence, Kenji’s facade melts away, revealing the vulnerability hidden beneath his public identity. Crossing the room, his tired eyes soften when they meet yours.

"Long day?" you ask softly, putting the tablet away on the nightstand.

Kenji nods, sinking onto the bed and resting his head on your lap. “You have no idea,” he murmurs against your thighs.

You gently run your fingers through his hair, the soft strands slipping between your fingertips. “Is there anything I can do to help?” you inquire, your voice fills with concern.

Kenji looks up at you with pleading eyes. “Just one thing,” he whispers, his voice barely audible.

“What is it?” you utter, leaning closer to hear him better.

“A kiss, please,” his lips pouting slightly.

Smiling fondly, you cup his face in your hands and press a soft, lingering kiss on his lips. “Better?”

Kenji chuckles softly, his eyes twinkling with mischief. “Actually, no,” he admits with a playful grin. “I think I need more.”

“You’re insatiable,” you tease, leaning in to give him another kiss, this time with passion.

Kenji sits up, pulling you closer into his arms. His hands gently caress your back as he whispers between kisses, “You spoil me, that’s why.” The intensity between you grows, turning into a full-blown make-out session, passion igniting between you both.

As the kiss deepens, Kenji pulls away slightly, his gaze locking with yours. His voice is filled with neediness and a hint of vulnerability as he murmurs, “Baby, I need you,” his words are a plea tinged with longing. You stroke his cheek tenderly, meeting his gaze with concern and affection.

“What do you need, darling?” your fingers tracing soothing circles on his cheek.

Kenji’s eyes soften, his hold tightening around you. “I want you to take care of me,” he whispers. He leans in, pressing his forehead against yours, seeking solace and closeness in your embrace.

From the way he holds you and the tremble in his voice, you understand exactly what he needs.

You stroke his cheek gently and grinning. “Let’s get you comfortable,” you murmur, planting a tender kiss on his forehead.

He nods silently, watching you with affectionate eyes as you rise from the bed. You walk over to his walk-in closet, your steps quiet in the dimly lit room. Opening the closet door, you glance back at him over your shoulder.

“Take your clothes off, Ken,” you say softly yet commandingly. “I’ll be there in a minute.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

Kenji's gaze lingers on you for a moment longer, filled with a mix of desire and anticipation. He begins by shrugging off his jacket, letting it slide off his shoulders and onto the floor with a soft thud. Next, he unclasps his watch and carefully sets it aside on the nightstand, the metal band cool against his skin. 

He peels off his T-shirt, revealing the strong lines of his chest and the subtle definition of his muscles. Each article of clothing he sheds seems to heighten the tension in the room; the air thick with longing. He unbuttons his jeans and steps out of them, standing in just his boxers briefs.

Inside the small room, you quickly secure the leather harness over your underwear, not bothering to undress further because you don’t want to waste any more time — Kenji needs you. Your nightgown is short enough that it won’t hinder any movement, allowing you to move freely. With practised efficiency, you adjust the straps to ensure they aren’t too tight. Finally, you attach the pink dildo to the harness, making sure everything is in place before stepping out to rejoin him.

As you step out of the closet, Kenji's eyes widen with a mix of surprise and arousal. His breath catches in his throat, and you can see the desire intensifying in his gaze. The sight of you, still wearing your nightgown with the harness and dildo securely in place, ignites a fire within him. He shifts slightly, unable to hide his growing excitement.

His vulnerability melts into raw need, and he reaches out for you, his hands trembling with anticipation. "You look incredible," Kenji breathes, his voice husky with desire. "Can’t believe you’re my woman.”

"I know, darling," you reply softly as you approach him. "And I’m all yours.”

Kenji nods eagerly, his eyes never leaving yours. "Please," he whispers, his voice filled with longing. "I’m so tired from today.”

You cup his face in your hands, leaning in to press a gentle kiss to his lips. "I've got you," you murmur reassuringly. "Just relax and I’ll take care of everything."

With a gentle but firm touch, you push him down onto the bed, guiding him until his back rests against the headboard. You climb onto the bed, straddling his lap, your eyes locking onto his with a mix of desire and tenderness. Leaning in, you capture his lips in a deep kiss. The kiss quickly intensifies, hands gripping his shoulders as you bite his lower lip, silently asking for entrance. 

Kenji parts his lips willingly, a soft gasp escaping him. Your tongue slips into his mouth with a blend of dominance and passion. His hands grip your waist, holding you close as you both lose yourselves in the kiss.

Breaking the kiss, you trail your lips along his jawline, nipping and planting soft kisses down to his neck. You can feel his pulse quicken under your touch. Kenji’s breath hitches, and his voice comes out in a needy whisper, “Hurry up and put it in already.”

You pause, looking into his eyes with a knowing grin. "Impatient, are we?" you tease gently, continuing to place kisses along his neck.

“Yes, been thinking ‘bout you,” he breathes, his eyes half-lidded with desire as he looks up at you. 

You chuckle softly, your manicured fingers tracing gentle patterns on his chest. "We can't rush things, Kenny," you murmur, your voice both soothing and commanding. "I haven’t prepped you yet."

Kenji lets out a frustrated, yet needy sigh, his hands gripping your waist tighter. With a tender smile, you press another kiss to his lips. "I promise, it will be worth the wait," you reassure him as your fingers trail lower.

Slowly, you pull his boxer briefs down. His aching cock springs free, standing proudly, the sight of it sending a thrill through you. You lick your lips at the sight, feeling the heat radiating from him.

You lean over to the nightstand, opening the drawer and searching for the lube. Your fingers brush against the nearly empty tube, and with a sigh of mild frustration, you pull it out. Determined to make it work, you squeeze out the remaining lube onto your fingers, carefully gathering every last drop.

Gently, you spread his legs, positioning yourself between them. You begin to massage the cold gel into his anus with careful strokes, your other hand slowly working up and down his length. The combination of sensations makes him gasp, his body shuddering under your touch.

You slide one finger inside him, feeling him tense momentarily before he relaxes into the intrusion. His breath comes in ragged gasps as you work a second finger in, stretching and preparing him. Leaning in, you capture his lips in a kiss, silencing his moans with your mouth. 

As you press a third finger inside, he groans into the kiss, the sound vibrating against your lips. He grips your silk robe tightly, his hands clutching the fabric with a mix of urgency and need. His body arches into yours as you take him to the brink of ecstasy.

Knowing his body so well, you sense he’s about to come, so you pull your hands away, eliciting a whine from him at the sudden absence of your touch. You glance at his hole and realise the gel isn’t quite enough for him to take you yet. A smirk curls your lips as you caress his jaw, an idea forming.

“Suck my dildo, baby.”

Kenji’s eyes widen with a mix of surprise and excitement. He nods eagerly, his breath coming in shallow pants as he anticipates what’s to come.

He pushes you to make space for him, his hands gripping your thighs as he leans forward, taking the pink dildo into his mouth. His lips and tongue work eagerly, coating it with saliva as you watch, your own arousal building with each movement.

“That’s it,” you coo, combing your fingers through his hair. “Make sure it’s nice and wet for you.”

Kenji fervently responds to your praise, his eyes shining with desire and appreciation. He gets off on your approval, each encouraging word making him suck harder, his mouth working expertly over the dildo. He moans around it, the vibrations adding to the growing heat between you both.

“You’re doing so well, Kenji. So eager to please me,” you purr, your fingers tightening in his hair. 

His eyes flicker up to meet yours as he redoubles his efforts, his tongue swirling around the tip,  lips sliding up and down the silicon shaft. The sight of him – the Ken Sato, so submissive and devoted – sends a wave of possessiveness through you.

You’re suddenly reminded of the press conference earlier, where one of the journalists had been flirting with him openly. The memory ignites a flicker of jealousy and anger within you, fueling your possessiveness. Without thinking, you push his head down onto the dildo, gripping his hair tightly.

"That's right," you say breathlessly, your voice edged with a mix of authority and jealousy. "No one else gets to have or see you like this."

Kenji's eyes widen slightly, but he doesn't resist. Instead, he works harder, his mouth moving more eagerly over the dildo, saliva dribbling onto the bedsheets.

"You’re my good boy," you murmur again, a possessive glint in your eye. "Only I can give you what you need.”

You push the dildo deeper into his mouth, watching as his nose brushes against the leather of your harness. Tears well up in his eyes, but he doesn't pull away, his hands gripping your thighs for support. You hold him there for a moment, savouring the power you have over him.

One…two…three…four…five…six…seven. 

Kenji's eyes look up at you, wide and glassy. His tears spill over as he struggles to breathe, but his desire to please you keeps him in place. You finally ease up after seven seconds, allowing him to take a gasping breath.

You wipe the saliva from his chin with a gentle touch. "You did great, Kenny. Proud of you.”

Kenji's breath hitches, his chest rising and falling with emotion. "Thank you," he manages with a hoarse voice. 

“You're welcome, sweetheart," you whisper, your voice firm yet tender. "Now, lay down on your back for me."

Kenji obeys without hesitation, shifting to lie back on the bed, his eyes never leaving yours. You grab a pillow and slide it under his hips, positioning him perfectly. You watch as he settles, his body displaying eagerness. You position yourself over him, eyes scanning his body, admiring his form as you prepare to continue.

You angle the dildo at his entrance, teasing the tip in first, watching his reaction. His eyes almost roll back, and a low groan escapes his lips. Slowly, you push yourself in, feeling the resistance give way as his body accepts the intrusion. The mixture of his saliva and the lube allows for a smooth glide.

He moans loudly as you fill him, the sound echoing in the dimly lit room. His hands grip the sheets, knuckles turning white as he adjusts to the sensation.

“You’re taking me so well, baby.”

His moans deepen, his body arching towards yours, seeking more of your touch. You lean down, your lips brushing against his ear. "Do you like that?" you whisper, your breath hot against his skin. "Tell me how it feels."

"Feels...so good," he pants. “Can you move, please?”

Without hesitation, you begin to thrust into him, your movements slow and deliberate at first. The friction builds as you move your hips against his, each thrust eliciting a gasp or moan from his parted lips. His hands find your hips, trying to pull you closer, deeper, as his need grows more urgent.

The room fills with the sounds of your bodies moving together, the soft creak of the bed, and his breathless whispers of encouragement. "More," he pleads, his voice thick with desire. "Please, more."

You quicken your pace, each thrust becoming more powerful and precise, hitting just the right spots to drive him wild. The look of pure ecstasy on his face fuels your own arousal, and you lean down to capture his lips in a searing kiss, muffling his cries of pleasure as you take him to the edge.

"Harder," he murmurs against your lips, his voice a desperate plea. The silk robe clings to your skin, becoming an annoyance in the heat of the moment. With a frustrated growl, you almost rip the delicate fabric off, tossing it aside without a second thought.

Now free of the robe, you feel the cool air against your heated skin, heightening your senses. You grip his hips firmly, your nails digging into his flesh as you increase the intensity of your thrusts. Each movement sends waves of pleasure coursing through both of you.

His hands clutch at your back, sliding the nightgown off your shoulders until it pools around your hips. His nails leave faint trails on your skin as he tries to ground himself in the overwhelming sensations. You lean down again, your breath hot against his ear, "Who’s making you feel good, hm?"

"Just you ma’am…please, don’t stop," his voice shaky with desire. 

Your movements become even more frenzied, driven by the sight of his pleasure and the sound of his desperate pleas. The nightgown, now bunched around your waist, adds tantalising friction as you thrust into him. His head tilts back, exposing his neck to your kisses and nips, each contact sending shivers through his body. 

You admire the marks blooming on his skin, every bite and hickey, a visible claim that he belongs to you. His eyes flutter shut at every thrust you make. “Eyes on me, pretty boy,” you command.

He struggles to comply, his eyes wide and glassy as they lock onto yours. He can feel himself getting closer, so you move your hand to his aching cock, helping him with his release. The combination of your touch on his cock and the way your dildo hits the right spot sends him into overdrive. 

Kenji's breathing becomes erratic, his body trembling under the intensity. With a final, powerful thrust, he comes hard, his release coating his torso in thick spurts. The room is filled with the sound of his cries of pleasure mingling with your heavy breaths.

As the waves of his climax subside, exhaustion quickly takes over. His eyes close, and he falls into a deep, satiated sleep. You chuckle softly, pressing a tender kiss to his forehead. Carefully, you pull out, eliciting an unconscious whimper from him, and begin to clean him up. You wipe away the sweat and arousal with wet wipes, ensuring he's comfortable and clean before pulling the covers over his body.

Watching him for a moment, a sense of satisfaction washes over you. You brush a few strands of hair from his forehead, “Rest well, darling,” you whisper then quietly leave the bed to deal with your own...problem.

[quack-quack-snacks]

Floating Above Those Dark Skies

My Navigation and Masterlist

My Sweet Home Masterlist

My Cha Hyun-su Masterlist

Pairing(s): Cha Hyun-su x Fem!Reader Summary: Living with the love of your life and the girl you love like a daughter is perfect. Except for all the bad parts. Warnings: Season 2 spoilers! Follows the dialogue of the episodes relatively strictly (I know some people like that but some people don't so it's a warning), Reader being like a second mother to Ah-yi, Hyun-su being a great big brother/father figure, slight talk of previous suicide attempts (The National Suicide and Crisis Hotline is 988. There are so many people who care about you and would love to help you. You are not alone), injuries, underage drinking (but they're in the apocalypse so who cares), canonical death, hurt with comfort, the appearance of (soft and kinda ooc) monster!Hyun-su, no use of (y/n), reader has the nickname "Lucky". Word Count: 17,132 (wow, what a doozy)

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Hyun-su led the way as you all walked to his home. Halfway there, Ah-yi complained about her feet hurting and it was then you noticed she had been barefoot this entire time. 

‘We definitely need to fix that,’ you thought. 

Before Hyun-su could even open his mouth, you crouched down and extended your hands out to her. She rushed forward to jump into your arms with a tired smile. When you straightened back up, she rested her head against your shoulder and was out like a light within a few minutes. 

“She seems to like you a lot,” Hyun-su whispered fondly as a gentle smile laid itself on his lips. After making sure she was secure in your arms, you smiled back at him and dropped one hand from holding her to hold his hand. 

“I guess I’m just a toddler whisperer. I think she likes me better than you,” you joked and he let out a scoff while squeezing your hand.

“Yeah, sure. Whatever,” he told you in an offended tone you could tell was fake by the smile threatening to break his facade. 

After a few minutes of comfortable silence as you walked, you asked the question that had been burning in your mind since you saw him again with the girl in your arms. “So… who is she?” 

He let out a heavy sigh before pushing a tree branch out of the way for you to walk through since your hands were full. 

Always the gentleman.

“She’s Seo Yi-kyung’s baby.”

You let out a quiet gasp. “What? But she hadn’t even been pregnant for half a year? And this is at least a 4-year-old child!” You whisper shouted at him, completely shocked by the information. 

“I don’t fully understand it either, but I do know she’s hers,” he assured you and you let out a sigh, your eyes wide as you tried to process the information. 

“So, is she a monster-human mix as well? Is she like you?” You asked. You hadn’t noticed the way Hyun-su snapped his head towards you because you were too focused on the girl in your arm, letting out small breaths that tickled your neck. The way you said the sentence was so unlike anything he had heard before - especially relating to talking about monsters and neohumans. You sounded so soft, not an ounce of judgment or resentment in your voice. You sounded like no matter what the answer was you wouldn’t treat her any differently. You would adore her just as much as you were in that moment with your face buried in her hair as she let out quiet snores in her sleep. He gave a soft smile at the thought. 

“I think so. She's grown so much since I first met her. Her actual age is around 5 or 6 months.”

“Wow,” you breathed and he couldn’t help but marvel at the way your voice embodied adoration and your smile was so bright it set the sky on fire despite the sun falling over the horizon. “That’s… wow.”

The rest of the walk was spent in silence. At some point, Hyun-su’s hand moved from holding yours to circling your waist as you hugged Ah-yi to your chest protectively. Eventually, the three of you arrived at a dock where a large boat was parked. 

 You weren’t all too surprised to find he had lived on a boat for the past half-year but you couldn’t help the small part that didn’t believe him when he told you. 

He hopped up onto the boat first before helping you, careful not to wake Ah-yi. After the two of you were safely atop the boat, he led you to the captain’s quarters and helped you lay the girl in your arms down onto the nest of blankets and sweaters assembled to make a bed. Her dress had dried surprisingly quickly on the way to the boat, the only thing left to be damp was her hair.

 You weren’t so lucky.

Your clothes stuck to your skin uncomfortably but you refused to complain, giving a - hopefully convincing - smile to Hyun-su when he saw you detach your shirt from your chest with a grimace. He walked away for a few moments and you sat down at the entrance to the captain’s quarters, resting your head against the door frame until his soft footsteps brought your attention back to him. He stood in front of you with a pair of folded clothes in his hands. 

“I have these if you want to change into some fresh clothes. I don’t have any towels but this might help.”

The hesitant and shy look on his face made a smile break out on your own. You gave him a nod and took the clothes from his hands. You didn’t comment on how they were exactly your size but it made your heart flutter. 

“Thank you,” you told him genuinely.

He nodded back at you before pointing to a door inside the quarters. “In there is a bathroom for whenever you want to change. I’ll wait for you out here.”

You nodded and turned before the smitten smile overcame your face stupidly at the thought. He just said he would wait for you and you could feel your heartbeat quickening alarmingly while heat rose to your cheeks. You walked into the bathroom and looked at yourself in the mirror. It was kind of scary. You hadn’t seen your reflection in a few months, never venturing into any areas with cars and rarely going near water. All the mirrors in the women's locker room back at the stadium had been broken after a monster outbreak and the monster breaking all of them because she was ‘too ugly.’ 

You honestly almost forgot what you looked like, but you were beautiful. You had always thought of yourself as a relatively attractive person but never the kind that would make someone turn their head. Now, you found yourself unable to look away. Your skin was glowing, whether that be from the sweat collecting from the walk or the water, you didn’t know. Any blood that had collected on you over the past few weeks had been rinsed off in the lake and you relished in the feeling of being clean of it for once, despite how the stickiness of the wet clothes you were still wearing still made you feel a bit dirty.

Snapping out of your amazement, you quickly took your old clothes off, replacing them with the ones Hyun-su had given you. It was a simple pair of dark gray sweatpants and a maroon short-sleeved shirt. You took off your unbearably uncomfortable socks and replaced them with the soft wool socks he provided as well. Now dry, you exited the bathroom to see Hyun-su had stuck to his word and was waiting for you as he leaned against the door frame of the room, though this time in a different, dryer outfit. 

“Hey,” you said softly to get his attention. He looked over at you and smiled when he saw you all dressed and dryer than before. 

“Hey,” he whispered back. He held his hands out for you to give him your wet clothes and you did reluctantly. He walked over to the edge of the boat and laid them over the edge so they could dry before returning to you. “Well, you should get some sleep.”

As if his words were magic, you suddenly felt the events of the day hit you like a truck and you yawned, nodding your agreement. “I think that’s a good idea.”

You gave a quick look around the room before deciding to sleep next to Ah-yi with your head using a part of her ‘bed’ as a pillow.

Hyun-su winced as he saw you settle against the hard floor of the boat and walked forward without thinking. He gently grabbed your shoulders, lifting you and then settling you against his chest while you sat in between his legs. 

You blushed but said nothing as you settled with your cheek pressed against his chest, his heartbeat echoing against your ear and calming your nerves.

“Sleep,” he told you and tightened his grip around you. “I’ll keep watch.”

Your tongue felt heavy with sleep as you spoke your next words with a slight slur. “But what about you?”

He let out a soft laugh as he heard your breathing even out almost immediately after your sentence ended. He let his head rest against the wall behind him as he kept his gaze on the door.

“I’ll be okay,” he whispered as he briefly looked down at your peaceful sleeping face. “As long as you’re here with me…”

“Lucky.”

~A Week Into The Apocalypse, In Green Home~

It had been a week since the apocalypse started, and you had barely seen Hyun-su. The way the other residents and survivors treated him caused you to be so angry. You were thankful that at least one person - Eun-yu - didn’t treat him like a monster. 

She wasn’t much different though, considering she still avoided him most of the time. 

It was after the reappearance of Yi-kyung and the failed mission to retrieve medicine for Ji-su and her surgery that you got the chance to talk to him for more than just a quick goodbye or hello. 

“All alone?” You asked him as you approached the staircase. The candle in your hands burned a bright yellow and smelled of cinnamon sugar. His head looked up at where you were approaching and nodded as you settled yourself on the stairs with him. Although he appreciated you trying to give him space and sitting a short distance away, he couldn’t help but wish you were closer. You smiled at him and smoothed your hands along your pants when you were seated. 

“Are you scared?” 

The question through you off guard. Giving a quick look around the room, you didn’t see anything that you would consider to be a threat so you weren’t really sure what he was talking about. 

“Of what?” You asked, tilting your head in confusion at the boy. 

He mirrored your head tilt with a confused look of his own. Inwardly you laughed at how the two of you must look like confused dogs when their owners told them a command they didn’t understand. 

“Of… me?” He questioned again and a small laugh left you when you finally realized. 

“Oh, Hyun-su,” you reached over to gently grab his hand as you looked him deeply in the eyes. “I promise you I could never be scared of you.”

He looked down with a small smile at that and you could see the small hints of red on his ears and cheeks. 

“So, I’ve been meaning to ask you,” you started and gently released his hand. He immediately felt cold at the lack of your added warmth. “I never tried because I wasn’t sure if you even wanted to talk to me, but is there a reason why you never came by? Even after you were given a choice to leave the quarantining room?”

He paused as he thought for a moment. “I thought you didn’t want to see me. You were the only person not put on guard duty so I figured it was because you asked not to.”

You let out a sad sigh. “Shit, I’m sorry. I promise that’s not what happened.”

He looked up at you with sad, confused little puppy eyes. “It’s not?” 

You shook your head. “The first, and only, time I was put on guard duty, I tried breaking the lock on the door,” you told him and looked away sheepishly. 

“Really?” He asked after a moment of stunned silence. 

You nodded in assurance. “After that, Eun-hyuk tried to do whatever he could to keep me as far away from you as possible. I was hoping that would change since you got out but now I know why it didn’t,” you smiled at him sweetly and he felt the heat rise to his cheeks so he looked away. “You know,” you continued. “I always saw you stop by my door right before you would leave, but you never said anything. Was that also because you thought I didn’t want to talk to you?”

“Partially. It was mainly so I could just see you before I left. Every time I thought I was going to die I thought about returning so I could at least try to fix whatever was happening,” he told you. Now he was the one who looked sheepish as he scratched the back of his neck. “I always backed out at the last minute though.”

You smiled and scooted closer to him on the stairs, moving down so you were on the same level and making it so only half a foot of space separated you. “I guess I was like your lucky charm then, wasn’t I?” You teased and lightly bumped your shoulder against his. 

“Yeah, I guess you were.”

~Back To The Present~

It had been about a month since you reunited with Hyun-su. You’d grown closer to Ah-yi in no time. She looked up to you and it seemed she just needed another girl in her life to have around. Your favorite part about growing closer to her was she had upgraded your honorific from ‘Miss’ to ‘Unni’ which made your heart clench adoringly every time.

The first time Hyun-su decided to make a trip into the city to collect some supplies, he was so hesitant to leave the two of you alone. You promised you would protect Ah-yi and yourself with whatever it takes; that seemed to be enough for him to be comfortable enough to leave. He never lost his hesitancy to leave the two of you alone despite each time he came back the two of you would be fine.

The most recent time was no different. You sat on top of a large, red, metal shipping container with Ah-yi as the two of you drew using the chalk you were fortunate enough to find a few days ago.

“That looks beautiful, Ah-yi! You are such a good artist,” you praised her on her drawing and she visibly beamed. It was a simple drawing of some flowers and her, you, and Hyun-su. It was clear it was made by a child but it was so beautiful in your eyes. 

“Thank you, Unni!” You ruffled her hair which she squealed at until you noticed Hyun-su walking towards the two of you with a smile on his face and a hand hiding behind his back while the other supported a red bag over his shoulder. “Oppa!” Ah-yi exclaimed and you smiled at her excitement. 

He rounded the corner of the large container and brought the hand hiding behind his back out to place a pair of pink shoes on the top. Ah-yi gasped while you had a big smile on your face. 

“Come on!” You urged her and she sat on the edge of the box so Hyun-su could slip the shoes onto her feet with the cutest smile ever on his face. Once the shoes were on, he held his hands out for her and she eagerly jumped down, having full faith that he wouldn’t drop her. Once he set her down, he reached his hands out for you to take and you gave him a funny look. 

“What’s wrong, Lucky?” He voiced his thoughts with a confused tilt of his head. You rolled your eyes at him while smiling. Your heart fluttered at the nickname. He’d started calling you it more often since the two of you reunited and yet it still gave you butterflies.  

“I’m okay, I can get down by myself,” you reassured him and turned around while you slowly lowered yourself from the canister, your front facing the metal. 

You heard Hyun-su softly breathe out a laugh from behind you before a hand grabbed onto the back of your shirt and pulled. You let out a yelp as you felt yourself falling only to land bridal style in Hyun-su’s arms. You clicked your tongue in faux annoyance and crossed your arms while he tried to hide the smug smile on his lips. 

“Going full ‘knight in shining armor’ mode, are we now?” You teased him and he blushed, pointedly avoiding your gaze. Suddenly, your stomach dipped as you felt him pretend to drop you and your arms wrapped themselves around his neck while he looked at you with another self-satisfied smirk.

“Well, it looks like my ‘princess’ needs her ‘knight in shining armor,’” he said softly as he looked away from you and you slapped his chest. He kneeled down when Ah-yi ran up to him. Knowing exactly what he was offering, she used one of his extended hands along with yours to help prop herself onto his shoulders. Hyun-su regained his grip on you as he grabbed the red bag he had set down and stood back up to his full height before starting the walk in the direction of the boat. You rolled your eyes, knowing any protests about him carrying you would be brushed off. Instead, you just snatched the red bag from his hand, placing it on your lap and holding it tightly to your body as you gave him a challenging glare. He just rolled his eyes with a fond smile and continued walking. 

The three of you made small talk as he carried you. Ah-yi explained what you and her had done while Hyun-su was venturing off and you chimed in every now and then with a comment. Hyun-su explained how he saw a peculiar monster today.

“It was like a mermaid with wings.”

Then, you both went on to explain what a mermaid was to the child. 

When you arrived at the boat, Hyun-su set the both of you down and Ah-yi started pulling you to the edge of the boat. You laughed as you walked up to the contraption. It was during your first week that you made the efficient self-fishing machine. It was a relatively simple mechanism that was made of a bunch of fishing poles and a homemade weight sensor. Whenever one of the poles was tugged on by something in the water, the device yanked it up and whatever was attached to the hook was left dangling in the air. 7 times out of 10, the hook was caught on litter in the ocean or a monster that was able to detach itself but there were the 3 times where you would catch a fish or two and the three of you would share it for dinner. 

It became a bit of a game for Ah-yi and yourself, guessing if the day would end with a fresh meal or a degrading empty can with barnacles growing on the side. 

As Hyun-su smiled at the two of you, he walked over to the stairs leading to the roof of the captain’s quarters and sat on the top, watching the sunset. No matter how many times you invited him to join the two of you, he always refused. It was nice you had a special activity to bond with Ah-yi over and he used that as his excuse every time.

It wasn’t even 10 minutes later as you were skinning the rare fish you’d caught with Ah-yi watching attentively as you explained the different anatomy parts to her that Hyun-su noticed a familiar face climbing the steps of the boat. He climbed down and started walking over to her while the two of you stayed distracted. You only looked over and noticed the two when you heard their footsteps. You carefully set down the knife and fish, wiping your hands on a stray towel beside you, and stood up to walk over beside Hyun-su. Ah-yi followed up behind you, grabbing onto the back of your shirt shyly. 

“I came too late, didn’t I?” Yi-kyung asked from in front of you as she looked at the girl shyly standing behind you. You decided not to answer considering you still weren’t sure how you felt about the whole situation of her leaving her child. Instead, Hyun-su answered her question.

“Not at all. You’re here now, right?”

She looked down and you could see the guilt and regret on her face. Slowly, you turned around to face Ah-yi. “That’s your mommy,” you told her and she looked at her hands shyly. “Why don’t you say hi.”

You lightly pushed her in the direction of Yi-kyung and the woman kneeled so she was face to face with her.

“Hi there,” you heard her whisper to the girl while you stood up to your full height. You wrapped your arms around Hyun-su’s waist and leaned into him while you watched them interact. Yi-kyung brought her into a hug and you smiled at the relief that settled on her face. 

Over the next few months, you and Hyun-su traveled through the city together, occasionally going back to visit Yi-kyung and Ah-yi but mainly wanting to give them the privacy a mother and daughter should have. It was adorable to come back and see the markings on the wall increase where Yi-kyung marked her daughter’s growth every day. Everything seemed to be going perfectly for the family of two.

Up until that day.

You had an awful feeling in the pit of your stomach for the entire day, feeling as if something bad was going to happen and you needed to get back to the two girls on the boat. When you shared your feelings with Hyun-su, he didn’t question it for a second, immediately going with you to rush back. 

When you arrived at the boat, you found a teenage girl covered in blood wearing the same dress as the little girl you’d grown to love while sitting on the bed blankets and jackets. You walked slowly towards her and she snapped her head up when she saw your feet enter her vision from where she had her head hung low. You kneeled in front of her, tentatively reaching a hand out to hold her cheek and she leaned into it.

Just like Ah-yi always did.

You let out a shaky breath as you finally voiced the question. 

“Ah-yi?”

She nodded, her eyes filled with fear.

Fear of resentment.

Fear of abandonment.

Fear of your fear. 

You just let out a sigh, whether it was from relief or surprise, you didn’t know. What you did know was that this was your Ah-yi and you would love her no matter what form she would take. You wrapped your arms around her and brought her in for a hug which she returned immediately. Relief coursed through her body so evidently that you could practically hear it. 

“It’s okay. Everything’s okay,” you dispelled her fears, bringing her closer and rocking her as she cried into your shoulder and told you what happened. You smoothed down her bloodied hair, not caring about how she was staining your clothes with the blood coating her. 

Once she calmed down a bit more, you gathered a rag from the bathroom.

“I’ll be right back, okay?” You promised her and she nodded. You turned and left, closing the door behind you and giving her a playful wink through the window which she giggled quietly at. Hyun-su followed you as you walked down the stairs of the boat and to the edge of the water. As you kneeled down to dip the rag into the lake's water, you started asking the questions on your mind about what Ah-yi told you happened.

“How did they even find this place? How did they find out about her being mixed?” You asked Hyun-su. His lips twitched into a small smile when he heard you refer to her as ‘mixed.’ He remembers you telling him the reasoning behind it like it was yesterday.

“I don’t like the word ‘monster.’ I always associated the word ‘monster’ with someone who acts evilly and neither of you are like that. I know you’re not entirely human anymore but I refuse to call you monsters. Human or not, you are still a good person.”

It was the moment he had set it in stone that you were the one he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. 

“I don’t know,” he answered your questions. “But I have a bad feeling about the whole thing,” he paused momentarily before continuing. “What do you think we should do about the whole… touch thing she has?” He asked you and you frowned in thought.

“Well, I don’t think we should do anything. It’s a part of who she is and she shouldn’t feel the need to be ashamed of it. I don’t necessarily think she should use it on people, least of all those undeserving of it, but she can learn to control it. She doesn’t have to live in fear of herself.”

Just as Hyun-su was about to reply to your heartwarming statement, the two of you were interrupted by Ah-yi screaming and crying from the boat. You both ran in the direction of the scream and when you got there you saw Yi-kyung with her head down as blood dripped from her eye while Ah-yi was rubbing at a wound on her forearm. 

“What’s going on?” Hyun-su questioned in a panic. Seeing the bloody knife on the ground as well as a bloody pencil, you pieced together what happened. It seemed Hyun-su did too, if his sigh was any way to tell. “Why did you have to do this?”

Yi-kyung let out a few heavy breaths as she breathed through the pain coursing through her eye. “I’m her mother. No matter how she changes, or what form she takes… I need to recognize my little girl. I won’t ever lose her.”

It was then you realized the wound Yi-kyung inflicted on Ah-yi was black. You let out another sigh, anger, and understanding fighting for control of your emotions as you realized the purpose of her actions. She may have had better intentions behind the action, but how she carried it out was not the way to go. 

As Yi-kyung rose and left the scene, you sat down in front of Ah-yi, carefully reaching for her left arm where the wound had already healed. You gently used the rag to wipe down her arm, then her other arm, and then her face. You wiped down all the blood that tainted her smooth skin while she sat there silently, most likely in shock by what just happened. The domestic act, despite the violent acts that brought it about, brought a wave of emotion over Hyun-su as he watched the two of you. 

It made him realize how much he wanted a family with you one day. 

After Ah-yi was all clean, you gave her a pair of clothes to change into while you and Hyun-su went to the opposite side of the boat to talk while you waited for her. When she came out, you walked over to give her a hug which she gladly accepted. She squeezed you just as tightly as you squeezed her. You wished you could engrave it into her brain that you would never, could never, be afraid of her. 

Afterward, she went to sit on a barrel, swinging her legs back and forth while you watched her and leaned against Hyun-su’s embrace. It was all so calm until Yi-kyung appeared from the boat’s stairs and walked towards Ah-yi with purpose. Ah-yi, still angry at her mother for what she did, hopped off the barrel and started walking away but was stopped when Yi-kyung’s hand wrapped around her bicep and aggressively pulled her back. The woman shoved her daughter’s hands into a pair of pink gloves connected by a rope that she placed behind the girl’s neck. 

“Don’t take those off no matter what. Understand?” Yi-kyung told her daughter. You rushed forward, feeling anger simmer beneath your blood at the sudden display of aggression she started showing toward her daughter. 

“Hey, don’t you think this is a bit extreme?” You told her, standing in between the two girls. You felt Ah-yi grip your shirt from behind you. You could tell even if her body had grown more, she was still used to her childhood ways of having you protect her. 

“She’s my daughter, I will do as I see fit,” Yi-kyung told you sternly before swiftly turning around and walking back down the stairs of the boat, leaving the three of you alone. 

You turned around to face the girl and sighed when you saw her speed-walking to her sleeping space in the captain’s quarters and locking the door behind her. You and Hyun-su decided to just set up camp outside the door, leaving her alone for the time being so she could sort out her thoughts. 

The next morning, you woke up to the sound of Yi-kyung panicking. You instinctively looked around, looking to protect Ah-yi until you realized she wasn’t there. You rushed to stand up and ran to where her mother was breathing heavily and pacing back and forth.

“What’s going on? Where’s Ah-yi?” You questioned and she turned to face you.

“I don’t know! I was looking for her this morning and I can’t find her anywhere!”

“Shit,” you muttered to yourself. Your thoughts were racing, trying to think of any place she could possibly be. When you finally landed on an answer, you started walking off.

“Where are you going?” Yi-kyung called out to you and you scoffed, not bothering to face her as you continued walking. 

“To find your daughter.”

When you got to the garden dome, the rusting doors were firmly closed unlike the previous times you were here with Ah-yi. Not deterred in any way, you rammed into the doors, successfully sending them flying open. You winced at the loud noise and walked in. 

“Ah-yi!” You yelled out, praying your instinct was right and she was here.

“Go away, Unni,” you heard her soft voice tell you from further into the garden. 

Sighing, you walked closer until you saw her sitting on the grass flooring while playing with a flower. 

“Ah-yi, why don’t you come home?” You tried but she just shook her head. When you realized she wasn’t going to say anything else, you walked closer.

Imagine your surprise when she scrambled away from you, desperate to keep the space between you two. 

“Ah-yi, what’s wrong?” You asked gently, stopping in your tracks to give her the space she desired. 

“Don’t touch me! I might hurt you!” She exclaimed fearfully through a sob and you cursed her mother for putting that image in her head. Taking another slow and gentle step toward her, you internally cheered when she didn’t move away. You took more steps toward her until you were sitting right in front of her and your hand reached for hers. 

When she pulled back, you gave her the best reassuring smile you could muster. “Sweetie, I know that you won’t hurt me. I promise.”

She hesitated but when you reached for her hands again she let you take them. You gave her a smile and squeezed her hand before pulling her into your chest. Your arms wrapped around her shoulders and held her tightly while she started crying more, her body wracking with the violent sobs she let out. 

“I just don’t understand why she hates me so much! Those men hurt me first!” She sobbed into the crook of your neck and you softly caressed her hair, brushing the loose leaves and grass strands out. 

“I know, I’m so sorry she did that to you. You definitely didn’t deserve that,” you reassured her and lifted your chin to rest your head on top of hers when you saw Hyun-su leaning against a wall while watching the two of you with a frown. You used a hand to wave him over and he slowly walked over so he was sitting about a foot away from the two of you. You looked back down at her and kissed her forehead lovingly. “I don’t want you to be afraid of yourself. You did what you had to do in that situation and no one is blaming you for it. Your mom is just…” you hesitated, looking to Hyun-su for support on how to explain the girl’s mother’s actions in a way that wouldn’t drag her name through the mud any more than it already was.

“Your mom was just worried,” Hyun-su intervened when he noticed your pleading gaze, bringing a hand to rest against Ah-yi’s back comfortingly. Ah-yi jumped a bit, startled, but otherwise didn’t do anything. “It was a shock to her to not only see you grow 10 years older in a few seconds but also to see how you dealt with those men. She didn’t want to lose you.”

“You mean she was scared. Scared of me,” she argued.

The both of you stayed quiet for a minute before you spoke again. “I know it doesn’t seem like it now because of what happened yesterday, but I promise you she loves you,” she started crying again and you just hugged her tighter to you. “And if you don’t believe me, at least know that I love you.”

It was the first time you’d expressed that to her in words and she looked up at you in surprise. 

“Really?”

The pure innocence and surprise in her tone were enough for a genuine smile to break out on your face. 

“Of course,” you told her sincerely and brushed her overgrown bangs to the side of her face. 

‘I guess I should trim those soon,’ you thought to yourself. 

“How could I not love you? You’re amazing!” You teased her lightly and she grinned at you. “You’re like a daughter to me, Ah-yi. I can’t see a life in which I wouldn’t love you.”

She dug her head into the crook of your neck again at your words. 

“I just stopped crying,” she complained with a whine that made you laugh. “Don’t make me start again!”

“Okay! Okay,” you caved and leaned back to look at her again. “Why don’t we go home now?” She hesitated for a moment before nodding decisively. 

The three of you stood up and you offered your hand to Ah-yi without a second of hesitation, something you could see in her eyes she appreciated. 

“Ah-yi,” Hyun-su said as the boat came into view in front of you all. You’d stopped by the lake where you saved her all those months ago on the way back and spent a few hours there. Both of you could tell she didn’t really want to go home yet so you extended the day as long as you could. 

She hummed and looked over at him from where you had her propped up on your back in a piggyback ride. She had stepped on a rock and dramatically complained about it until one of you just decided to pick her up and bring her along. 

That someone being you. 

“I…” he hesitated and you freed up a hand to reach over and give his hand a reassuring squeeze. “I need you to do me a favor. When we get back, I need you to go easy on your mom.”

You could feel her body tensing on your back, not expecting his words to be that. You quickly intervened. “We don’t expect you to forgive her anytime soon. Hell, I don’t really expect you to ever forgive her, but I think we both agree that you should give her another chance,” you told her. She huffed and rested her chin on your head childishly. “We’ll talk to her whenever we get back and tell her what she did was wrong, but she was only trying to keep you with her.”

There were a few moments where Ah-yi stayed silent as you walked and you got nervous about what her reaction would be until she sighed. 

“Fine.”

You sighed in relief and smiled. What you wouldn’t tell her is that the ‘talk’ you would be having would most likely be a screaming match between the two of you while Hyun-su tried to be the mediator. 

It had been about a month since that day and you’d stayed with Ah-yi and Yi-kyung for about half of it. The rest of the time, you and Hyun-su traveled through the city together, enjoying the feeling of being free with each other and occasionally spying on the soldiers of the stadium when they went out on their supply runs. 

“I have a bad feeling,” Hyun-su told you one day while the two of you were washing a muddied shirt in the river. 

“Let’s go check it out then,” you told him, standing up and wiping your hands on your trousers but he held his hand up. 

“I… I don’t think you should come with me.”

You looked at him, feeling shocked and slightly hurt but masking it under a calm exterior. “O-oh. Oka-”

“I just mean it feels dangerous. I don’t really know how to explain it,” he interrupted you quickly, hesitantly taking one of your hands and squeezing it reassuringly. 

You gave him a small frown. “But I don’t want you to be in any danger either.”

He smiled confidently at you and stared deeply into your eyes. “I promise I will be okay. Just stay in the shed until I get back. I’ll be back in a few hours at most.”

After a moment of hesitation, your eyes flicking between the broken down shed behind you and Hyun-su’s dark mocha brown eyes, you nodded in agreement. He smiled at you before turning in the opposite direction and starting to walk away. Just as he started to get out of arm's length, you tightened the grip you had around his hand. He turned back to you, tilting his head in question but your head was down, your eyes focused on his hand where you gently played with his fingers. 

“Please return to me,” you whispered, barely audible to him and he sighed. Taking a step forward, he wrapped his arms around you, one resting on the back of your head and the other around your waist. 

“I will, Lucky. I always will.”

Eun-yu walked down the empty street of the city, darkness clouding every corner and making her jump at every noise. She wasn’t nearly as experienced as you when it came to venturing off alone and outside of the stadium so it was all new to her. This was her first time out of the stadium, let alone all by herself, and she had barely any idea of what to do or where to go. It all started when she was waiting for you at the exit you used to go through when you went on your personal expeditions. 

She wasn’t dumb. She knew you were leaving every day and trying to hurt yourself, yet every day you came back safe. Maybe a little broken and bruised at times, but alive nonetheless. Despite the two of you not being close, she still cared about you more than anything. You were the closest thing to a friend that she had. She was positive you didn’t remember this, but she had helped comfort you one night as you cried after another - but also thankfully your last - attempt to leave this world. You told her about the force that kept you alive, protecting you from monsters and from yourself. You told her about how you blame yourself for Hyun-su’s disappearance and how he was most likely dead. You told her everything. Afterward, you ended up passing out in her embrace and sleeping the entirety of the next day away while she stayed by your side to ward off anyone wanting to wake you. 

Once you woke up, you seemed normal. The same expressionless look on your face as you went on with your day. It stayed that way for a long time. Eun-yu tried her best to do subtle things to help you; to make you feel more wanted and make you blame yourself less.

Until one day, you never came back. 

You leaving and never returning is what led her to be standing at the exit not even a week ago, feeding some of her rations to a small stray kitten. It’s what led her to stay there even when Chan-young approached her and asked her what she was doing. It’s what made her stay even after a young girl she hadn’t recognized revealed herself. It’s what made her stay despite the pleas to go back inside from Chan-young and allowed her to see the woman she thought had died show up and take the girl with her. 

It is also what led her here, all alone looking for you or the girl or Yi-kyung. Whilst finding you was her main goal, she would be satisfied with any of the three. 

She lost Chan-young somewhere along the way after he was poisoned by the girl accompanying that old man but she didn’t let that deter her. 

Now, in the dark shadows looming over the alleyways she walked through, a long metal pipe clutched in one of her hands, she searched the abandoned city with the need to find you forcing down any fear she was feeling. The unoccupied hand had an old piece of clothing wrapped around it, protecting any dirt from getting into the wound where she protected Yeong-su from that soldier.

She often wondered if you knew how much you inspired her to be brave and protect those around her.

After some time, she found herself standing in front of a large greenhouse. Most of the windows were broken and she could see the plants inside had overgrown their once pristinely gardened form, but it was gorgeous regardless. The moonlight shone through the broken glass and cast spotlights of glimmering luminescence across the vegetation. She took a moment to admire everything, noting how you would’ve loved a space like this until she heard a growling sound from behind her and her guard immediately went back up. Moving the pipe so it was tightly grasped in her hands like a baseball bat, she held it defensively and slowly crept closer to the source of the growling. The large crater in the ground made her sick, reminding her of the tragedy that happened less than a year ago when the government tried to kill as many people as possible in order to ‘save humanity from itself.’ 

As she got closer, she raised the pipe over her head, ready to strike at any moment. The growling of the monster got louder as she approached and she prepared herself to swing until-

“He won’t attack you.”

Eun-yu turned around, facing the new voice and seeing the same girl from before. She lowered the pipe, letting it hang loosely at her side as the girl took slow steps toward her. Since she was almost positive this girl would have nothing to do with you, she instead asked about Yi-kyung. “I’m looking for Yi-kyung. You know where she is, right?” The girl stayed silent, gradually getting closer as she continued with her measured footsteps. “I have to meet with her.”

The two girls stared at each other as the younger girl approached. Silence stilled the air until it was broken.

“Mom… the people… they’re all bad.”

“Did you say ‘Mom’?” Eun-yu questioned, her face portraying her confusion and shock.

‘She couldn’t mean Yi-’

“You’re no different,” the girl concluded, taking her last few steps forward more quickly and launching Eun-yu down into the hole behind her. Feeling the ground disappear from below her feet and the wind rush through her hair, she screamed. 

A scream.

A scream was what stopped you from continuing your washing of Hyun-su and your clothes. You snapped your head in the direction of the noise so fast you were worried you got whiplash. Unconsciously clutching the current piece of clothing you’d been washing in your hands, you started sprinting in the direction of the noise. As you got closer, the area around you got brighter and you noticed it becoming increasingly more familiar to you. It was when you saw the familiar metal canisters that you realized you were near the boat.

It was also when you realized the boat was on fire. 

You gasped as you saw the flames licking away at the deck in the distance, pushing your body past its limits as you forced yourself to go faster, faster, faster. You were beyond terrified at the implications the fire had.

‘Was this the bad feeling Hyun-su had?’ You asked yourself. You tried your best to stay as positive as possible until you got there but it was difficult with all the possibilities swirling in your mind. However, there was one possibility you clung to: while the boat burning was bad in itself, maybe nobody was on it.

Maybe.

When you got to the stairs of the boat, you climbed them as quickly as you could, ignoring the pain in your foot when you slipped down one and ended up stepping on it wrong.

‘That’s a problem for later.’

You got to the top, not seeing anybody in the burning embers surrounding you. Quickly covering your mouth with the still-damp piece of fabric in your hands and thanking yourself for unconsciously holding onto it, you ran around the top of the deck, looking for any signs of life while simultaneously praying for none. Seeing nothing, your mind ran at a hundred miles per hour as you tried to decide if that was a good or bad thing. 

“Cha Hyun-su!” You screamed out, the use of his last name representing your evident panic. “Seo Ah-yi!” It was when you circled the captain’s quarters that you saw a familiar lean body. “Seo Yi-kyung!” 

You rushed forward, sliding down to your knees as you reached her and turning her onto her back. You winced as you saw the burn marks and ash littering across the side of her face. You brought the wet clothing down from where it covered your mouth and nose, quickly replacing it with the cuff of your jacket as you used the wet fabric to cover Yi-kyung’s nose. The fire caught onto your pants and you scrambled to put it out, letting out muffled screams into your sleeve as it burned your skin. 

You watched as the small baby monster you knew to be Ah-yi’s friend approached you and Yi-kyung. You were mainly confused about why it showed up here willingly, usually, monsters were terrified of fire and would avoid it at all costs but that didn’t seem to be the case. 

“Go away! Get out of here!” You screamed at the baby but it just babbled at you, running up to you and setting out the fire on your pants. Then, it began to circle around the two of you, using its body to roll out any fire that got too close. You quietly sobbed, your tears feeling like ice against your flaming skin. “Thank you,” you whispered to the small creature, feeling so grateful yet guilty for the way it was putting itself in danger for you. 

Suddenly, as you felt yourself fading out of consciousness, the exhaustion from the run over, and the pain in your foot getting to you, you heard a familiar voice call out for you.

“Lucky!”

Hyun-su...

Eun-yu screamed out as she fell until she quieted, accepting her death to be by falling down a large hole while not knowing if her only friend was dead or alive. Just as she lost all hope, the sound of something whipping through the wind above caught her attention along with a familiar large wing made of bone and muscle only. It was only for a moment that she caught a glimpse of the boy’s face before his arm wrapped around her body and they shot up. 

Reaching the top, Hyun-su swung around so his body would take the brunt of the fall and they crashed. Sliding across the concrete, he used his wing to slow them down as much as possible and keep her as unharmed as he could. Barely taking a minute to breathe when they came to a stop, Hyun-su opened his arm and rolled Eun-yu off before standing back up. 

“Cha Hyun-su,” the girl tried, struggling to lift herself from the ground. Receiving no response as he continued walking toward Ah-yi, who was watching curiously from the other side of the crater, she tried again. “Cha Hyun-su!” She finally made it to her feet as she screamed.

Hyun-su let out a breath. He took a moment to force his eyes to return to their natural state instead of the endless void that would consume him when in his monster state before slowly turning around to face her.

“Are you really just gonna leave like that?” She asked him, more quietly this time as he faced her. His wing flapped lightly at his side, whistling through the wind in an ethereally beautiful way. 

At least, that’s how you would often describe it.

“Were you expecting a hug or something?” He asked her in a blank tone and she looked at him with exasperated annoyance. 

“Yeah, I was. I expected at least a ‘Glad to see you. How’ve you been?’” She retorted back at him, getting angrier by the moment at the completely blank look on his face. 

“But I’m not glad to see you,” he told her and she couldn’t help but expect it. She knew they weren’t close. Nowhere near as close as you were with Hyun-su. You always tried so hard to make him feel included, to fight for his rights even when Eun-hyuk kept you as far away from him as possible. After you tried to break the lock of the door that one time, he gave strict instructions to everyone who had a guard duty that they were not to allow you near the room. You would always leave Eun-hyuk with the same phrase after each failed attempt to see the boy.

“You’re a coward. You won’t go up the stairs to retrieve the residents’ items yourself and then you treat the man who does do it like scum. I can’t believe you.”

It was what made her like you in the first place. While she knew you and Hyun-su had known each other for a brief period before the apocalypse, she couldn’t help but admire how you stood up for the boy without a second thought. She was pretty sure she realized your feelings for him before even you did. 

“You weren’t supposed to know how to leave the stadium. You should’ve just stayed away,” Hyun-su’s voice broke her out of her brief flash of memories. 

“It was you all along…” she started, taking a stuttering step toward him. “That night with the rope… all the times she tried to kill herself… it was you who saved her, wasn’t it?”

By the lack of surprise or questioning on his face, she knew her answer. They stayed silent for a few more seconds, Eun-yu waiting for an answer and Hyun-su trying to provide one. Though his face remained monotonous, he was trying to come up with an answer that wouldn’t give her too much information but would satisfy her concern and need to know. 

“We crossed paths. I figured since we weren’t strangers I might as well help her out. I know what it’s like. She doesn’t deserve that kind of a death. That’s it. Nothing more,” he looked at her, making sure his words weren’t just floating in one ear and out the other. “You understand?” 

Without waiting for her to respond, he turned around again, rolling his eyes.

‘I have to get back to-’ 

“That’s bullshit and we both know it!” Eun-yu yelled from behind him, interrupting his thoughts. She took fast purposeful steps toward him as she continued to speak. “You’re in love with her, she was your everythin-!”

Hyun-su brought his wing down and scraped the concrete behind him, only a few feet away from where Eun-yu was standing. She held her breath, waiting for his next move and cursing herself for the shiver of fear that ran up her spine at his actions.

‘You would never fear him like this.’

Seeing him not make any more moves, she tried again. Prying her feet off the floor from where the strange acid was kicked up by the large appendage, she started walking again only for Hyun-su to slam his wing down again. This time, the toe of her front boot had melted off and she could see the black socks she wore underneath peeking through. She mentally slapped herself for how the breath she let out was shaky. Forcing herself to peel her boots off the ground again, she tried to take another step when suddenly a hand latched onto her bicep and pulled her back, sending her tumbling to the ground. 

“Are you trying to get yourself killed?” The large man, Ho-sang+ asked. His shoulders were draped with a homemade camouflage outfit made of grass and hay. The man raised his shotgun, aiming it toward Hyun-su who had still yet to turn around. “You monster piece of shit, what are you doing here?” The boy turned to look over his shoulder at the new voice. “Get gone!”

Right as Hyun-su turned back around to keep walking, Eun-yu spoke up again.

“Wait!” She scrambled to her feet, intending on running over to Hyun-su but the older man grabbed her shoulders and held her back. “Cha Hyun-su. Cha Hyun-su!” He came to a halt again and it was enough of a tell he was waiting for her to continue. “She…” she began, hesitating to tell him this in case her gut feeling was wrong. “She’s been missing for months. Do you know… I mean… is she…” She couldn't force herself to get her words out, only able to speak in between shaky breaths as she started to think of the worst possible outcomes. If her gut feeling was wrong and you weren’t really with Hyun-su, she didn’t know what she would do.  

Hyun-su turned back around to look at her over his shoulder. Keeping eye contact with her for a few moments as he debated whether to tell her or not, he relented.

“She’s alive.”

Turning back around, he could hear the breaths of relief Eun-yu and the older man both released, albeit for different reasons. 

Following Ah-yi, they both walked away from the two humans. He waited until they got to the edge of the river to start talking.

“Why did you do that?”

“I don't like her,” Ah-yi responded.

“So why don't you like her?” He pushed, 

“Every human is the same. She’s no different,” she yelled angrily before her voice dropped to a mumble he was just barely able to hear. “The only human to be an exception is Unni.”

Hyun-su looked at her when she stopped, the anger being shown clearly on her face and he was confused about why she was so riled up. The quiet atmosphere was only interrupted by the hooting of the owls in the nearby trees. 

“I was curious about humans at first… because both Mom and Unni are human. So I said ‘hi’ and they…” She took a shaky breath in before continuing. “They hurt me. They yelled and they pushed and... and they hurt me too. And they killed all my friends and monsters!” She screamed out, her voice heavy with raw emotion. “Leaving just me.”

“They were just scared,” Hyun-su tried to soothe her anger and pain as her eyes filled with tears. “Afraid of losing someone.”

“Then I'll give them a reason. Show them how scary it was,” her heavy breathing slowly evened out and Hyun-su sighed. He knew you would be able to help her with a situation like this better than he would. From the very first day, you always seemed to have a way of calming her down and helping her through the more difficult times.

“Let's get out of here. Yeah?” He suggested as tears began to fall down her cheeks, hitting the pavement below with an imperceptible plop. 

“There's no place for me. My house is gone,” she told him. 

“What… do you mean?” He asked after a few silent beats. 

“I… no longer need you. Not you, or Mom…” she paused to calm herself but couldn’t stop the sob that came with her next words. “Or Unni. Not anymore.”

Hyun-su let out a slight gasp before sprinting in the direction of the boat. He hoped his suspicions were wrong. He hoped Ah-yi wouldn’t do that to her mother.

But he knew she would.

He’d heard the countless nights you spent with her in your arms as you consoled her and reassured her about her mother’s love when she was positive it no longer existed. He knew how much she hated the woman who gave birth to her, hated her for the love she once had but lost on that fateful day. 

Hyun-su ignored the sharp pain in his lungs as he sprinted toward the boat, cursing lightly when he saw the fire engulfing it from afar. Finally reaching it, he ran around looking desperately for Yi-kyung and screaming her name. 

It wasn’t until he found both her and you lying on the ground that his panic started to take over. 

“Lucky!” He screamed, running towards you and dropping to his knees. He quickly picked both of you up, the weight not a struggle for him but the positioning of your bodies being a bit awkward. He ended up with Yi-kyung on his back piggyback style and you being held in his arms like his bride. Seeing the small creature passed out only a few feet away, he picked it up too and put it on your lap as he walked off the boat, letting the home full of memories burn itself to the ground forevermore. 

Hyun-su walked towards the swan boat about a quarter mile away from the boat. Gently setting Yi-kyung down first, he placed you down with your head in his lap. He cursed himself. He couldn’t believe he had just left you alone. He couldn’t believe you would go into such a dangerous place willingly. 

But then again, he couldn’t be surprised. You were like that, so selfless and kind. If you saw the boat on fire you would never allow yourself to stay behind while there was a potential of the people you loved being on that boat. 

He was thankful you at least were smart enough to cover your nose and mouth when you were there. The ripped and slightly scorched shirt covering Yi-kyung’s mouth was one he recognized to be yours. And although it wasn’t a great replacement, he saw how the cuff of your jacket sleeve was loosely placed over your own mouth, slipping once you’d fallen unconscious. 

As he was picking the bits of seared wood and singed fabric from your hair, a small whisper of his name drew his attention behind him to Yi-kyung.

“Hyun-su…”

He turned around, making sure not to jostle you around too much as he looked at her. Her face was burned, fresh wounds scarring the flesh of her cheeks that would forever alter her appearance. 

“Are you okay, Yi-kyung?”

“It’s all my fault it’s like this,” she started. Hyun-su stayed silent as she continued. “I just wanted her to be safe like you were,” she whimpered, it was unclear whether it was from the pain on her skin or the pain in her heart. “All I wanted was for her to…” she sobbed but no tears came out yet. She was dehydrated and wounded and it was clear she wouldn’t make it without medical help they no longer had. 

“It wasn’t your fault,” Hyun-su refuted.

Yi-kyung groaned as she sat up, leaning heavily against the edge of the swan boat. “I should’ve killed her.”

Hyun-su’s eyes widened at her words. While he knew that was what she had wanted when her baby was first born, he didn’t know it was still something she thought about. 

“In the back of my mind, I always had that thought. I know she must’ve felt it when I had those thoughts,” she breathed heavily, her breaths sounding gritty and labored. She looked at the girl lying in Hyun-su’s lap, feeling angry, regretful, and jealous, but mostly grateful. Grateful she had at least you to look up to and show her the way when she couldn’t. “I know she would always tell her about how she hated me,” she pointed at you weakly. “I know she always saw her as more of a mother than she did me.” 

“You’re wrong,” Hyun-su protested. “While Ah-yi loves Lucky, she needs you as her mother. I know because I was there too through all those days,” he looked down at you, eyes still shut and sweat clinging to your skin. “So was she,” he breathed out a sigh and looked back at Yi-kyung. “You said you were a bad mother, but you know that’s just not true.”

“The fault is all mine,” tears fell down her cheeks as she spoke, a soothing touch to her wounded face. “I was the one who made her like this,” she blamed herself, Hyun-su’s reassuring words either not registering in her brain or being completely ignored. “No, this is good,” she accepted. She knew her end would be soon. “It turning out like this is for the best. This way, I… I don’t have to kill my daughter.,” she sobbed.

“Were you really going to kill her?” He asked incredulously. At her lack of response, he continued. “Why? You’re her mother! So why?” 

“I don’t deserve to be,” she cut him off. “I could never be worthy of her, not when I treated her so differently than you did. Than she did,” she explained. She couldn’t fathom saying your name, feeling unworthy of being near you when she always had those terrible thoughts of hurting her own flesh and blood. You had always treated her so much better than she had, treating her like your own daughter, whether it was by blood or not. “I had the same thought hundreds of times. ‘Why is she cursed like this?’ Why?” She started sobbing again, the guilt and blame she put on herself for the past year torturing her soul. “It’s all my fault. My awful thoughts and desires turned her… into a… monster.”

Hyun-su scoffed. “Yeah, so what?” He looked at her and the surprise of his words stopped her crying. “Are monsters really all bad?”

Yi-kyung sighed and just as Hyun-su was going to continue talking, the soft babbling of the baby monster sounded out again, drawing both their attention to the mini creature. He gently picked it up, holding it in his arms as he spoke again. “This one saved you. Saved both of you. Saved you because you’re family…” his eyes filled with tears but he refused to let his voice break. “You see, monsters feel and recognize people. Because they were human once too.”

He hugged the monster to his chest, and the conversation ended when Yi-kyung faded out of consciousness. 

The group sat around the campfire, Ha-ni snuggled up against Chan-young’s side while the other two sat alone.

“So, which is it?” Eun-yu asked. “A brother? A boss? A dad? What are you to each other?”

“Why the hell does it matter? Just eat and get lost,” the older man evaded the question. 

“Um… why don’t you come back with us? You’ll be safer there,” Park Chan-young offered and Ha-ni’s head perked up in excitement. 

“Are we getting married then?” She asked, moving closer to his side and resting her head against his shoulder.

“Uh, that’s… that’s not what I’m saying,” he repudiated. 

“Safe? You guys have just been lucky,” the older man rolled his eyes at the suggestion. “That, or you don’t know better.”

“I think you might be underestimating some of us.”

“I don’t trust humans, okay?” He concluded.

“I’m not surprised. But you don’t trust monsters either?” Eun-yu integrated herself into the conversation once more. “And what about her?” She asked, tilting her head at Ha-ni. “You trust her?” He didn’t respond and it was silent for a minute. “Sure seems like it.”

Ha-ni, noticing how the atmosphere was turning strange and uncomfortable, interrupted. “Let’s go with them. Let’s go together, teacher, hmm?” She insisted, leaning forward in her seat to emphasize her wants. “Hey, let’s go!”

The older man looked thoughtful for a moment, considering his companion’s words before noticing something in the distance. 

“What are you doing here?” He screamed accusingly, raising his shotgun threateningly toward the figure approaching. 

Hyun-su walked forward. Yi-kyung was tied against his back using the long-sleeved shirt you used to cover your mouth in the fire meanwhile you were held in his arms, cradled against his chest protectively. 

He raised his head slightly to look at them, continuing his stride forward despite the threat of the gun in front of him. 

In the blink of an eye, Ha-ni appeared next to Ho-sang as he held the gun and moved his arms, forcing it to face the ground just as he pulled the trigger. It hit the rocks harmlessly and she looked at Hyun-su curiously. 

Taking a deep breath, he slowly lowered himself to his knees and placed Yi-kyung on the ground after untying her. Keeping you in his arms as he rose again, he held you close as Eun-yu rushed forward. Stopping just a foot in front of him, she looked down at you in shock. She reached her hand out to caress your cheek but stopped herself at the last second. 

“Please help,” Hyun-su begged and Eun-yu lifted her chin to look at him. “This was the only place I could turn to.”

Both Chan-young and Ha-ni walked over to where Yi-kyung was lying on the ground, kneeling down to properly assess the damage on her body. 

“How did she get like this? And the kid? The girl who left with you?” Eun-yu asked before looking down at you still in Hyun-su’s arms and finally allowing her fingers to skim along the feverish skin of your cheek as she whispered your name, stunned. “And what about her? Is she okay? Why isn’t she awake?”

“First, let’s get them both inside,” Chan-young stopped her questioning before Hyun-su could respond. Ha-ni helped him prop the woman on her back, fully intending to bring her into the trailer until a gunshot sounded. 

Eun-yu froze in shock, paralyzed by seeing Hyun-su stumble back with a gunshot to the shoulder. He fell to his knees once more, his grip on you loosening but refusing to let go. He gently set your lower body down onto his lap, his now free hand going to hold his wounded shoulder while the other held your upper body to his chest. He ignored the anger that stirred in his chest when he saw how close the shot came to your face, just missing by a few inches. Clenching his eyes closed tightly and blocking out the sound of everyone talking and screaming around him, he forced the familiar feeling of his monster down. When he finally looked up and opened his eyes he saw Eun-yu holding Ha-ni against her chest with blade centimeters from her neck. 

“- and I’ll cut her fucking head off.”

Ha-ni scoffed at her words with an annoyed smile but didn’t try to fight back or move away. 

“Way to prove my point about humans,” Ho-sang told her, not lowering his gun. “Pulling this shit after I saved your life is rich.”

“I said I’ll take him with me. I said I’ll take them so just… what's your problem?” Eun-yu begged the man, tears forming along her waterline as the situation continued to go downhill. 

“You’re with monsters,” Ho-sang explained, glaring at her from his spot. “That makes you a threat. And you call yourself human? Jesus.”

“You call yourself human when you just almost shot a girl in the face? He might not be human but she is!” She screamed at him and continued when she saw the flicker of guilt in his eyes. “And what makes you special? How can you be sure you’re gonna stay immune?” She questioned but he stayed silent. “What if you were to start showing symptoms? Seems a bullet is your only option. Since monsters have to die.”

Hyun-su groaned in pain before trying to stop her from baiting the man. “Stop it,” his words were spoken weakly as more blood spilled from his wound. He covered it with the fabric of his shirt, trying to avoid getting as much blood on you as possible but the splatters of blood across your forehead and cheeks told him it was already a bit too late for that. 

“And her?” Eun-yu continued, ignoring the boy’s warnings and protests as she started to speak about Ha-ni. “Could you put a bullet in her?” Her words were spoken softly but Ho-sang heard it loud and clear. He stayed quiet again, not willing to speak of the situation he feared the most. “How about I save you the trouble?” She offered.

“Oh, yeah. So this is who you are,” he finally spoke, nodding in disdain at her actions. 

“Stop it,” Hyun-su tried again but again was ignored. “Don’t do this Eun-yu,” he begged. 

Suddenly, Ha-ni grabbed the wrist holding the knife to her throat, and twisted it away from herself, spinning around so the knife was now in her possession and the tip was pointing directly at Eun-yu’s neck. There was a collective gasp from everyone watching and Ho-sang lowered his guns in shock. “Ha-ni!” He yelled at her as she stuck the point of the blade in Eun-yu’s neck, causing a trail of blood to leak out. 

After a moment of tense silence, she pulled the knife away and dropped it to the floor where it clattered against the rocks loudly. Pushing her forward, she walked over and entered her car, entering it and called for Ho-sang to join her. 

“In this life, we weren’t meant to be,” she started, talking to Chan-young as her companion got into the car and started it up. “Maybe the next one. Get rid of the girl though.”

The group watched as the two drove off before Chan-young turned to Hyun-su. “Are you okay to move? How’s your shoulder?”

Hyun-su pulled his hand away, the wound already having closed and the blood surrounding it was the only reminder that it was ever there in the first place. He nodded. “It’s okay.”

Chan-young took a few steps closer to him before kneeling beside him and looking at where you rested in his arms. The pain from your ankle and slight burns showed on your leg but you luckily didn’t seem to have any difficulty breathing or major damage. “And her? Are you still okay to carry her?” 

Hyun-su nodded once again while he moved his empty hand to once again rest under your knees and stood up. “Yes, I’m okay.”

“I think we’d better go. Monsters may have heard the gunfire,” Chan-young concluded and walked behind Hyun-su as he started the path to his chosen destination, whatever that place may be.

Eun-yu kneeled down to grab her bag and knife before looking back at Hyun-su. “Let’s go.”

He sighed as she started to walk behind him, taking a moment to look at you and make sure you were alright before he followed. He would have to wipe his shoulder down and clean the blood from your face before you woke up. He didn’t feel like worrying you about his injury just yet. 

Sighing once more, he turned around and started to follow the two. 

They arrived at the destination Chan-young had brought them to. It was a hospital, or at least it used to be. As they got inside, there was broken glass everywhere and scratches from an unnatural creature lining the floor. It was clear it was no longer the medical place it used to be. 

Setting Yi-kyung down on the hospital bed they found, Chan-young turned to Hyun-su and asked, “What happened to her?”

“A fire started where she was staying,” he started to explain, still holding you since all the other hospital beds they could find were not exactly clean. At least the one Yi-kyung was lying on didn’t have any blood stains on it. He didn’t mind though. “I think there was no way out. She was already unconscious by the time I made it in.”

“It’s carbon monoxide poisoning,” Chan-young concluded from the evidence provided before standing up urgently and turning to Eun-yu. “Something like a small gas tank should be lying around. Go look for some,” he then turned to Hyun-su who was getting ready to stand and help them. “You should probably stay here,” he told him and Hyun-su stayed silent for a moment as he looked at you in his arms before nodding in agreement. He moved to lean against the wall as the other two went off in different directions to search for the gas tank. 

After a while, there was the faint sound of someone yelling, “I found one!” Soon after, both Eun-yu and Chan-young returned to the bed, the boy carrying a gas tank in his hands which he set up next to it. Expertly, he plugged the tube into the tank and turned the air on, testing the pressure and how much oxygen was left in the tank. 

“Does it work?” Eun-yu asked just as the arrow pointed to ‘REFILL’ and Chan-young sighed. “What? What is it?”

“It’s out of oxygen,” he explained.

“So what happens now?”

“Her organs will start to fail without… without a steady supply of oxygen,” he told them before his head fell forward. “Fuck me.”

“Enough of that crap. Is there any other way?” Eun-yu begged, unwillingly to give up so soon. 

“It’s already too late.”

“Don’t say that unless you’ve tried everything,” she told him seriously, she then moved over to start picking Yi-kyung up by her arms. “Park Chan-young, help me carry her. Let’s get her to the stadium. We have to leave now,” she ordered but he didn’t move and Hyun-su just buried his head in your hair emotionally. “I said help me carry her!” She sobbed, setting her back down when he still didn’t try to help her and covering her face with her hands. 

The group just finished moving both you and Yi-kyung to another room, this one finally having another bed that wasn’t stained with blood and smelling of a rotting corpse. Chan-young helped Eun-yu carry Yi-kyung to the room while Hyun-su held you close, only letting you go when they found the bed for you to lie on. 

Despite how his monster body protested, he allowed Eun-yu to have a moment alone with you and Yi-kyung in the room, choosing instead to wait on the bench outside. He saw through the crack in the door how she held your hand gently and spoke words he couldn’t hear. He watched as she set your hand down across your stomach and retreated from the room to sit on the bench with him, leaving an empty seat between them. 

“Are you feeling better?” Hyun-su asked her once she sat down. She sighed quietly and he took that as her response. “We did the best we could.”

“Are you comfortable with this?” She asked him, not understanding how he could be so calm in a moment like this. “Is leaving her to die like that really the right thing to do?”

“Now that I think about it… I think it’s what she wanted,” he construed and she turned her head to look at him. 

“What?”

“Her boat was deliberately burned, but she chose to stay aboard.”

“Why, though?” Eun-yu whispered. “Why would Yi-kyung do that?”

“I wanna ask you something,” Hyun-su told her and she stayed quiet as she waited for him to speak. “How’s everyone doing? I’ve tried asking Lucky but she always gets really quiet when I do.”

Eun-yu’s lips quirked up minutely at the familiar term of endearment but the memory of her grief overwhelmed it. She took a few deep breaths to compose herself before answering him. “Hye-in and Su-yeong are dead. And Yoon Ji-su, too.”

Now Hyun-su knew why you would never talk about it, why you would always get quiet and have that far-away look in your eyes when he asked. He always figured you just didn’t know, that maybe you got separated at some point, but somewhere deep down he knew that was just wishful thinking. While he hated that you didn’t confide in him, he understood where you were coming from. Even a year isn’t always enough time to heal enough to talk about something so tragic. 

“Just like that, they’re all gone,” she continued in a whisper. He turned his head away from her as a tear fell down his cheek before she spoke up more loudly this time, masking the emotion in her voice with false confidence. “Now let me ask you a question,” she said. He turned to look at her but she was looking in the direction of where you lay on the hospital bed, head tilted to the side as you breathed easily. “How is she doing, really? Is she better?” Her voice almost broke as she unwillingly thought back to how you were feeling during your time in the stadium but she was able to mask it with a cough. While she was hoping you were doing better now that you were with Hyun-su and hopefully didn’t blame yourself for his disappearance anymore, she had to be sure.

“She’s doing good. She still has her bad days but overall she’s doing better.”

She breathed a sigh of relief, a single tear falling down her cheek. “Thank you.”

He turned his head to look back at her and saw she was now staring at him. “Hm?”

“You brought her back to me. I don’t know what I would do if I didn’t at least see her one more time. If I didn’t make sure she was still alive. So thank you.” 

He nodded. “Of course.”

“I also,” she continued. “Want to thank you for returning to her,” she shot him a watery smile as her eyes brimmed with tears. “God knows she deserves it.”

When you woke up, the first things you saw were the blaring lights of the white lighting fixture above you. Groaning, you brought a hand up to cover your eyes and turned your head only to gasp when you saw the burned face of Yi-kyung on the bed next to yours. Quickly throwing your legs over the side of the bed and standing up to check on her, you let out a yelp of pain as you stepped on your wounded ankle and crumpled to the floor. 

Breathing heavily, you cursed yourself before hearing the sound of fast-paced footsteps entering the room you were in. You leaned up on one hand and saw a face you’d longed to see for weeks. 

“Eun-yu?”

The girl snapped her head to where you sat and gasped out your name, running toward you and crouching down. She grabbed your arms and helped you stand up, making you sit on the edge of the bed so she could check out your foot. 

“How are you feeling?” She asked, concerned but all you could think about was the woman breathing unevenly on the bed behind her. 

“Fine, fine,” you said dismissively, only half listening to her concerns. “How is Yi-kyung? Is she okay?”

Eun-yu slapped your arm lightly. “You were passed out for half a day, let me worry about you.”

You gave a small chuckle at her words, reaching your arms out to wrap around her shoulders. “It’s good to see you, Eun-yu. I’ve missed you.”

She exhaled slowly, wrapping her own arms around you and letting herself relax in your embrace. 

“Wait, what am I doing here?” You asked as you softly pushed her away from you. “What are you doing here? Why aren’t you at the stadium? Are you okay?” You gasped, firing questions at her like a machine gun prior to grabbing the sides of her puffy jacket sleeves and pulling her a few inches closer as you looked her over for any injuries. Other than the small wound on her neck, she seemed to be relatively unharmed.

“That doesn’t matter right now,” she scolded lightly and lifted your wounded and swollen ankle up. “First, we should fix this up. I’m sure there’s some tape or something around here,” she started to walk away but turned back to look at you. “Don’t move,” she scolded with a finger pointed at you accusingly. You held your hands up in a surrender motion and laughed. 

After a while of looking around the room, she walked back with a wad of medical tape in her hand. You watched in awe as she started to expertly wrap your foot with the medical tape in a way that would help keep it in place. Noticing your stare, she explained. “I used to do ballet. I sprained my ankle and had to do this every day.”

“Well lucky me then,” you told her with a smile that she returned once she finished. She then cut the ripped pant leg off at the knee and cut the singed parts off. Using the burned-free part of the fabric, she gave you her hand to squeeze as she poured the clear liquid inside a bottle of vodka on your burns. You screamed and stuffed your sleeve into your mouth, both stopping yourself from breaking your teeth and muffling your pained noises. After finishing disinfecting the wound, she got to work on wrapping the cut fabric around your burns to prevent any further dirt from entering it.

Breathing heavily through your pain, you grabbed the nearly empty bottle of vodka after she set it down and lifted it to your nose. 

It looked like vodka.

It smelled like vodka.

Taking a sip, your face scrunched up in displeasure. 

Definitely vodka, although something was off. 

“Why is it so watery?” You asked her. Eun-yu’s head snapped up to see you bring the bottle to your lips again to take another sip. 

Grabbing the bottle away from you, she smirked and brought the bottle to her lips, drinking the last of the liquid while you whined. After sighing overexaggeratedly, she smiled at you and handed the bottle back to you. You shot her a glare “For one, when are you ever going to find a steal like that again? Had to make sure it lasted!” You laughed. “And second, regular vodka is too potent to use as a disinfectant by itself, you have to water it down so you don’t burn away your nerves.”

She secured the fabric with the medical tape and tapped your knee to signal she was finished. She helped you down from the table and let you wrap an arm around her shoulder as you limped over to the bench outside of the room. You thanked her just as you saw another familiar face appear around the corner. “Park Chan-young? What are you doing here?”

“Ah, you’re awake! How are you feeling?” He asked instead of answering your question. 

“I’m feeling okay, my ankle hurts a little but not too bad,” you told him with a smile before it faded and your head turned to look at Yi-kyung through the still-opened door. “She’s not going to make it, she?”

You heard the two of them sigh behind you and you let out a shaky breath. Tilting your head up, you tried to stop the tears from falling. 

It was silent for a while, the only sounds were the ragged breathing from Yi-kyung in the next room until Chan-young spoke. 

“Cha Hyun-su, was it?” He asked and your head snapped up to look at him while Eun-yu who was sitting beside you didn’t even flinch. “That’s the monster that killed Mr. Kim, right?”

You opened your mouth to ask what he meant when Eun-yu spoke before you could.

“It gets on my nerves when you use the word ‘kill’.”

He sat down next to her and leaned forward in his chair with his elbows resting on his knees. “Well, nonetheless, that’s how it went down.”

“Your curiosity will cost you someday,” at his silence to her words, she sighed and continued. “Mr. Kim was displaying symptoms.”

The news of this story was no surprise to you. While you weren’t there when it happened, you do remember how Eun-yu had relayed the story to you only a few nights after the incident. You didn’t know she knew it was Hyun-su though, and to be honest you felt slightly betrayed. 

“I don’t know when it’d begun.”

“Wait,” Chan-young started, gasping at the new information. “But why didn’t you say anything? You were branded as a murderer.”

“The Chief and I have had… a long-standing grudge. Yet we all lived because she opened the stadium to us. I can’t deny that. I just couldn’t screw her over like that.”

You quietly gasped. Despite the information not being new to you, you hadn’t known the reason she never spoke up was because of that. 

“Lee Eun-yu,” Chan-young said softly.

“Eun-yu, you shouldn’t have done that to yourself,” you scolded her quietly. 

“Don’t get me wrong. That wasn’t the only reason,” she continued, leaning back in her seat. “I didn’t know it was Hyun-su, but… either way, I didn’t want to tell Crow Platoon.”

Oh. So Eun-yu didn’t know it was Hyun-su. That definitely made you feel better than the idea of her knowing this entire time and just not telling you. 

When a sudden gasp was heard from the room Yi-kyung was in, all of your heads snapped up and Chan-young and Eun-yu rushed into the room. You stood up, hopping over to lean against the entrance when you slipped. 

Just as your hand missed grabbing the frame of the door, you felt an arm wrap around your waist and pull you back up. Turning your head to look at your savior, you were surprised to see Hyun-su with his arm supporting you and Ah-yi standing beside him, looking at you with just as surprised eyes as you were at her. The boy moved you so you were propped up against the door frame before he stepped into the room. 

“Could you step outside for a moment?” He asked the two as they stood beside Yi-kyung’s bed. They hesitated but eventually made their way out of the room. As Hyun-su walked up to the woman, leaning over her as she breathed raggedly, you wrapped your arms around Ah-yi and brought her into a hug. 

“Oh sweetie, I’m so sorry,” you expressed your condolences before pushing her away just enough so you could see her face. “How are you doing?” You asked her as you caressed her cheek and brushed a strand of hair behind her ear. 

She shrugged her shoulders, looking away unconvincingly. “I’m fine. She hated me anyway. I only came for Oppa.”

You tsked and brought her back into your embrace. “You and I both know that’s not true.”

She didn’t respond and Hyun-su turned back to look at the two of you, motioning for Ah-yi to walk in. As she passed by you, you smoothed down the back of her hair and squeezed her shoulder reassuringly. 

Hyun-su walked past her, letting her have her final moment alone with her mother on her deathbed. Instead, he walked over to you, wrapping his arm around your waist to help you walk as you all moved further down the hall to give the girl some space. Once he decided it was far away enough, he moved you over to the wall so you could lean against it and stood beside you. You leaned your head against his shoulder, wanting to give and gain comfort from the action. You all stayed there, silently, for a few minutes until Ah-yi walked down the hall. 

Hyun-su popped off the wall and she turned to face the two of you, mainly Hyun-su as he started to speak. “Why are you out here already?”

You leaned forward, grabbing onto his arm to support you as you looked at her. “You should stay with her a while longer,” you insisted softly. Her eyes fluttered down to where the medical tape peeked out above your shoe and the pant leg was taped in place around your calf before she fluttered her eyes back up to yours. 

“Mom’s not going to die. So stop crying, please.”

The way she said it gave you a bad feeling and the clattering that came from the direction of the room didn’t help to ease it. Hyun-su turned, making sure you were balanced before rushing over to the room. You glanced at Ah-yi before heading that direction as well, having Eun-yu and Chan-young help you.

“Yi-kyung!” You heard Hyun-su exclaim just as you all got to the doorway. When you looked into the room, you saw Hyun-su on the ground with Yi-kyung held in his arms while tears fell down his cheeks. 

You covered your mouth in horror as your own tears started to form. You stayed there, supported only by the door as you all cried over the loss of your friend. 

Your eyes shot open when you heard the sound of bones cracking. Her head was thrown backward and her back arched to the point where you were sure that was the bone-breaking sound you heard. The skin on the left side of her body started to turn black, almost as if ash had been painted across it. She started thrashing around, her body contorting inhumanely and her skin releasing a dark, unnatural smoke. As she rolled onto her stomach the bones in her back crunched loudly and she shot up. 

You barely had enough time to move out of the way before she ran into the door you were leaning on. Disoriented and dizzy, you couldn’t bring yourself to focus on what was happening around you until you heard the ringing of a gunshot and Yi-kyung’s half-monsterized body fell backward at the waist. 

“No, don’t do that!” Hyun-su screamed, rushing forward and moving Chan-young’s hands away while he held fast to the gun. 

“It’s too late for her. She’s already gone!” Chan-young yelled at him. 

You looked back at the woman to see the gunshot wound already gone, now covered with the same black markings that covered one half of her body. “H-Hyun-su,” you whimpered weakly and both men turned to look back at Yi-kyung. You let out a soft sob as you saw the tear slide down her face. 

“Yi-kyung,” Hyun-su whispered and she raised a hand toward him. Reaching for him, she started to walk forward before her other arm, the remaining human arm, reached out to grab her own hand, almost as if to pull her back. “You guys should go back,” he whispered to you all. “Take Lucky with you, she can’t walk on her own.”

“No! Not without you!” You protested but Hyun-su didn’t turn to face you. Eun-yu looked at you hesitantly before turning back to him. 

“What about Yi-kyung?” She let out through a sob. “How could she turn so suddenly? She wasn’t showing any symptoms.”

“Her daughter did this to her,” he explained hurriedly.

“Ah-yi…” you whispered in realization. 

“She turns people to monsters?” Chan-young questioned, still aiming the gun at Yi-kyung. “Monsterization is uncontrollable by humans.”

“She’s not a human,” you said lowly. 

“What the hell are you talking about?” Eun-yu screamed at you just as Yi-kyung rushed forward to jump out the window of the room behind you. 

“Leave! Now!” He yelled at them before jumping out the window after her. 

“Hyun-su, no!” You cried out, trying to lift yourself to your feet to no avail. Eun-yu and Chan-young, ran to the broken window, looking out as you continued to struggle. “Eun-yu!” You screamed at her and she turned around to face you with widened eyes. “Please! You have to help him! Don’t let him get hurt, please,” you begged her.

She nodded, determined. Turning to Chan-young, he nodded at her and they set off in the direction of the stairs to the bottom floor. 

You sat against the glass doors of the room Hyun-su was resting in. For the first hour, you were in there with him, holding him while he cried. After he fell asleep, though, you decided to give him some space. You waited outside, leaning your head back against the cool surface of the glass with your uninjured leg bent and held to your chest while the other was extended outward. 

Down the hall, you could see Eun-yu watching you until Chan-young approached her. You looked away as you saw them staring at you. Both had sympathy lacing their gazes that you couldn’t stand to see. Sympathy meant you had something they felt sympathetic towards. You didn’t want to think of what that thing was. All you wanted was to be back at your shed, doing laundry with Hyun-su while Ah-yi sat down on the edge of the river bank with her feet dipping into the water. 

But those days were over, at least for the time being.

“What are you gonna do now?” Park Chan-young asked Eun-yu, her gaze still locked onto your form curled up across the hallway. 

“I don’t know,” she admitted. “I found her, and she’s alright. That’s good enough for me. I know she’s in good hands with Cha Hyun-su. I don’t want her to come back to the stadium with us. Not when she was so miserable there,” she told him, thinking for a moment before giving a conclusive answer. “I’m gonna wait for Hyun-su to wake up. I’ll wait with her until then. Then I’ll say my goodbyes and return to the stadium. You?”

“I should get back there,” he decided. “I’ve been gone for too long.”

She nodded in agreement. “Yeah.”

Chan-young gave a final look back at where you sat now with both your knees bent and your face buried in your arms. “Send them my regards, both of them,” he told her and she nodded up at him. “I’ll see you at camp.”

With a moment of hesitation, he turned in the direction of the stairs and started walking toward them. 

It had been a couple of hours since Hyun-su fell asleep. Eun-yu had dozed off about an hour ago but you couldn’t bring yourself to shut your eyes for too long. So you sat there, your eyes staring off into the distance, unfocused and blurred. It wasn’t until the sun started to set, the light shining through the blinds of the windows and casting a golden orange glow onto the tile floor that you snapped out of your daze. Carefully bringing yourself to a standing position, you turned around, opened the door, and walked through. Your eyes immediately went to where Hyun-su was previously lying down, but when you didn’t find him there, you panicked. Raising your eyes, you let out a breath of relief when you saw him sitting on the bed next to the windows, leaning back on his right arm and swaying slightly. 

“Hyun-su?” You asked softly but received no response. Walking closer, you saw his eyes were closed as he continued to sway. It seemed like he was barely conscious and his body kept falling right before he caught it, over and over again. Reaching the point that you were standing right in front of him, you reached up to place your hand on his right cheek, a feeling he immediately leaned into. “Oh, lovely,” you whispered. “Let’s get you back to bed.”

About to pull your hand away from his cheek to clear the pillows and blankets piled on the bed behind him, you stopped when his left hand shot up and grabbed onto your wrist, keeping you in place. Confused and concerned, you brought your other hand up to hold his other cheek. “Hyun-su?” You asked. “Are you okay?”

He slowly opened his eyes and you gasped once you saw them. 

You’d only seen him like this once before and it was after he protected you from a particularly strong monster. Halfway through the battle, all of his mannerisms changed and he moved completely differently. It wasn’t until the monster ran away, Hyun-su covered in its blood yet not a scratch on him, that you saw his eyes. 

You weren’t scared. You could never be scared. 

Not of him. 

Never of him. 

But it did surprise you. 

After he returned to his normal self, he told you about how he tried to never go into that state of being because he wasn’t in full control. Despite the honest way you told him he would never hurt you and that you trusted him, he still kept the monster side of him tucked away as much as possible. 

It seemed that wasn’t the case right now, though. 

“Why are you here?” You whispered to him, your voice not at all accusing or scared, not even a little bit tentative. 

“You don’t want me here?” He questioned. It was so strange to see Hyun-su’s body and hear Hyun-su’s voice but know it wasn’t him, at least not completely. 

“I didn’t say that,” you told him, your eyes lightly scolding him in a way that made his lips quirk. “I just asked why you were here. Is he…” you hesitated, still unsure of how to fully phrase questions when he was in this state. “Are you okay?”

“He’s hurt. Let him rest for a bit,” he explained as he leaned more into your palm. His grip on your wrist hadn’t been all too tight to begin with but it still softened to a loose hold as he kept eye contact with you. 

You nodded at his words, brushing your thumb along his cheekbone and your lips curving into a subtle smile when his eyes closed contently. “Is that why you’re here?” You whispered, not wanting to break the calm atmosphere. His eyes opened again and he stared at you. “To help him with the pain?” He nodded and you sighed. It wasn’t the physical pain on his body either of you meant, and you both knew that. The pain of losing Yi-kyung, and then losing her again at his own hands was too much for him. It most certainly would have been too much for you, so you couldn’t blame him. Not that you would have anyway.

He tightened the grip he had on your wrist and gently brought it away from his cheek before releasing it completely. He turned his head to look forward in the mirror in front of him and used the hand once holding your wrist to move the collar of his shredded jacket away from his shoulder. You winced as you saw the wounded skin there, bringing a hand up to do something but hesitating. Instead, you looked around the room before your eyes lit up as you found what you were looking for. You released his face from the hand still holding his cheek and turned around, taking a step forward with your good foot. He leaned forward, leaning off his right hand and using it to grab ahold of your wrist. You looked back at him. 

“Stay,” he said simply and you smiled.

“I’m not going far.”

He held onto your wrist for a while longer before softly sliding it down to the tips of your fingers and slowly releasing you, all the while keeping eye contact. You felt the heat rising to your cheeks and turned before he could tell how flustered you were at the simple action. Taking another step, you tried to hide the limp in your walk and mask the pain on your face as you grabbed the materials and returned to where he was seated. Setting the medical supplies down next to him, you reached for the pillow behind him and took off the pillowcase surrounding it. Grabbing the mostly empty bottle of rubbing alcohol, you poured some onto the pillowcase before using one hand to pull the collar away to reveal the dirty wound underneath. 

You raised your gaze to his eyes only to find them already looking back at you. “This’ll probably sting,” you told him sorrowfully. You waited a moment for him to acknowledge your words but he just continued to stare at you with a blank, yet almost soft, look. You used your other hand to hold the alcohol-soaked pillowcase and bring it up to his wound where you carefully started dabbing away the blood and dirt. Looking over at him every few seconds to see if he was in pain, you found none each time whilst he didn’t take his eyes off you. Once the blood was cleared away and the pillowcase was thoroughly stained, it was clear to see the wound was much smaller and less serious than it originally seemed. A fact that made you sigh in relief.  

Before you could reach for the bandages to cover his wound with, Hyun-su grabbed your waist and pulled you to stand in between his legs. 

“Wha-?” You started to question but stopped when his arms wrapped around your waist in a hug. His head turned to the side and he rested it against your stomach. It didn’t take long for you to return the hug, albeit a little confused and startled. 

“You know I love you, right?”

The sentence sounded slightly muffled, and you weren’t sure which version of Hyun-su was speaking, but regardless, you answered, “I know.”

His arms tightened around you, a comforting and promising squeeze. “And you know I’m never letting you go again,” he paused, turning to look up at you. It was both a surprise and yet not when you saw one of his eyes was still the bright blue he had in his monster form, but the other had returned to his natural brown. “Right?”

You placed your hands on his cheeks, leaning down to leave a tender kiss on his forehead. 

“I know.”

[sugawhaaa]

HYUNJIN ONE-SHOT

⭐️ •[ Bold Colour ]• ⭐️

Warnings//genre:: SMUT, one-night stand, squirting, fingering

Pairing:: ex-idol!dom!hyunjin x sub!fem!reader

A/N:: this is such a long fanfic but...I hate it. I hate it so much 😭 but I spent too many hours on this to not post it...

Skz masterlist::🎨

🎧::

You had seen this man in the museum at least three times a week and he often had security guards near him, not deliberately surrounding him to avoid drawing attention, but they were always cautious when he's in the building. You do have to admit that he is a very attractive young man, probably a model or something. All the girls you work with swoon over him and can hardly speak around him...

It was very late at night, only a few minutes before closing, when you saw him come in again. You held back a groan and greeted him. "Welcome, how can I help you," you lean over the desk slightly and the man smiles before handing you a card.

He had a V.I.P. pass for the museum aka he can waltz in any time of the day, take a stroll, and leave. That wasn't the only perk of the card but that's what he seemed to use it for. You take the card, enter it in the system and hand it back.

"Thank you," he smiles fondly before making his way. You notice he has a bag on his back and you quickly call out.

"Sir, can I check your bag?" You call out and he freezes.

"Almost forgot!" He smiles before handing you the bag. You only did a brief search because you didn't have any reason to believe he was up to trouble. He's been here over a thousand times. You noticed he had a sketchbook tucked in there which undoubtedly interested you but you didn't pry, only handing him the bag back.

"Thank you, enjoy your time," you nod and he smiles before carrying on. Since the museum closes in a few minutes you decided to do some cleaning around the museum, sweeping, and mandatory upkeep. It was five minutes after closing time and you noticed the man staring at a statue and scribbling down some notes or something in his sketchbook, his pencil between his teeth as he used pen. How strange.

You then went up to him, politely asking him to leave and he nodded.

"Yes, I'll be leaving," he closes his book, tucks the pencil behind his ear, and begins to walk away. You sigh in relief before heading back to the front desk. As you do some more closing you notice the same man in the corner of your eye. It was like 15 minutes past closing! You groan and hurry over to the area you saw him in but he turns the corner sharply, bumping right into you.

His body was sturdy and surprisingly strong and knocked you right over. He quickly reached to catch you, tossing his sketchbook down to grab your wrist. "Sorry about that," he apologizes quickly as he assists you up but your attention is more drawn by the photos on the floor. Some were roses and very artistic charcoal drawings but a few were more...erotic.

"My bad," you say as you help him pick up the drawings but also get a closer look at the sketches. Most were women that seemed to be in a lot of pleasure...it stirred something inside you but you brush it aside.

"No, no, it's my fault," he kneels down to pick up the drawings. "Sorry you have to see all this," he blushes with an innocent smile. "Do you draw?" He asks as he scoops up the drawings.

"Uhm I drabble here and there," you hand him back the drawings as the two of you stand. Hyunjin steps back and looks you up and down. You blush, feeling a little embarrassed by his gaze.

"Modeling?" He tilts his head and you shake yours.

"Nope, just desk worker," you laugh softly and the man laughs.

"Surprising. I'm shocked no one has offered you a job before..." he thinks for a moment. "This may be a little bold of me but," he tucks his hand into the pocket of his dress pants and hands you a business card. "Perhaps you'd be interested in being a muse for me. Just an offer," he shrugs before quickly making a leave.

Hwang hyunjin.

That's his name. How nice, rolls off the tongue nicely. Over the next few days, you consider his offer, but he was right, it was a very bold move on his part.

What he wanted was a nude muse or at least little clothing so you really wanted to be careful but...what's the worst that could happen right?

"Hey, it's the girl from the museum you bumped into last week and you gave me your card," you say into the phone and you heard Hyunjin shifting on the other line.

"Oh, hey," you can hear the smile in his voice. "I'm guessing you've...considered my offer?" His voice is laced with some mysterious intent that you can't read through speech alone.

"Yes. I'll model for you," you smile and Hyunjin cheers softly.

"Great! Are you thinking about going nude or just a little exposed?" He asks purely for data. He doesn't mean to pressure you at all.

"I'm not sure yet,"

"That's perfectly fine, whatever makes you most comfortable darling," he chimes and you blush at the way he calls you darling...the two of you then work out the details of your meeting and before you know it you're at his house, totally gagged. His house was huge and a little modern but still classic and it looked fresh. Must've been built at least 5 years ago. You ring the doorbell and Hyunjin quickly opens the door.

He's wearing a tight-fitted dress shirt, slightly unbuttoned, with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows and tight dress pants that flare out at the end. His hair is tied back in a ponytail with a pencil tucked behind his ear. "Ah, there she is," he smiles and invites you inside.

He does all the basic things like show you around just a bit and offer you some water and some snacks before getting started. "Okay, so have you decided what you'll be wearing?" He asks softly and you think for a moment.

"Will you...judge me?" You ask abruptly and Hyunjin laughs.

"Judge what? I'm doing this for art, to learn about the female body, I don't mind anything. Body hair, stretch marks, scars, etc let it shine," he smiles sincerely at you and you consider his words.

"Alright then...I won't wear anything," you nod and Hyunjin fights to hide his smile at your words.

"Sounds good," he nods and pretends not to watch you undress by adjusting his canvas and preparing materials. He bites his lip as he watches you unclip your bra and slide it off your shoulders, setting it on the designated stool. His eyes follow carefully as you hook your fingers around your panties and slowly pull them down.

You can't deny that you see the lust in his eyes but he hides it well. "Okay, can you raise your left arm and now tuck your hand behind your head," he instructs you how to pose before smiling. "Perfect," he nods and you stay posing for a while as Hyunjin quickly sketches out the basis of your body. "You have a stunning body," he smiles as he looks between you and his canvas. He licks his lips discreetly, more of a focused wipe than sensual, but it strikes something in you.

"You think?"

"I know," he replies quickly and you blush. "You cold?" He looks up worriedly and you shake your head.

"Nah, it's comfortable in here," you keep your pose and Hyunjin nods.

"Good, you're doing good," he quickly finishes up the sketch before pulling out his watercolor and painting his masterpiece carefully. His consistent praise makes your heart race, and your face flush but you try to hide it.

Before you knew it the painting was finished and he was proud to show you. He flipped the canvas around and you smile.

"Wow it looks incredible! Art is your gift hyunjin," you smile and he blushes.

"Thank you but I only recreate what I see," he glances your body up and down quickly before offering you a robe. "And here's your payment," he reaches into his pocket and starts counting out bills before handing them to you. 70 bucks...not bad.

"Wow that's a lot more than I thought," you blush and Hyunjin shrugs.

"Tip," he smirks before wrapping up his materials but you didn't want to leave just yet...

"Can I see some of your other live paintings?" You sway on your feet and Hyunjin smiles, excited that someone wants to see his work. He pats the bench he's sitting on, inviting you. He pulls out a stack of canvases and papers in a protective sleeve.

There were lots more paintings of women in pleasure but it somewhat confused you. If it was a live painting did the women make that expression the whole time? "How'd you make these ones?" You point to three paintings of the same woman, as the paintings of her go on they get more erotic. It looked almost like snippets from a night of pleasure.

"Well, this was uhm...a girl I knew. We had a weird relationship," he blushes softly. "She liked when I filmed her during our nights together and so I asked her if I could paint some screenshots from the videos," he invitingly shows you the drawings and the story somehow makes the drawings more lewd. You then stumble upon a photo of that girl giving a blow job.

Your heart skips a beat as you take in the sight, your mouth watering and Hyunjin panics, flustered that you found that photo. He quickly takes the stack from your hands. "I uh...that one is not supposed to be in there,"

"Would you...make a painting of me like this?" You tilt your head to him and he quickly turns to meet your eyes. He crosses his arms and arches a brow

"What are you getting at here darling?"

"You know what I'm implying," you smirk and he chuckles lowly.

"Your friends would kill you. They all fawn over me no?" He chuckles and you shrug.

"Beats me," you lean closer and Hyunjin sighs.

"How am I supposed to resist such a hot girl," he sighs and unties his hair. "You sure about this?" He looks up at you and you nod. Before you knew it his lips were melting against yours, your tongues dancing for dominance as his hands roamed over your nude body. You hesitantly raised your hands to his chest as well. He pulls back from the kiss to breathe. "You're so fucking beautiful," he admits before leaning down to kiss your neck.

You toss your head back, allowing him more room as he eagerly nibbles at your neck. He brings his hands down to your ass, gently lifting you onto his lap, his boner painfully present against your crotch. He tears off your robe and sucks a nipple into his mouth.

He wasn't just moving fast, he was moving urgently. He craved you. He was desperate for you. He needed you.

"Ah, Hyunjin," you put your hands to his head as he sucks on your tits, making you moan and shiver in pleasure. You grab his long hair between your fingers and he moans softly as his tongue flicks against your nipple.

"Grind on me baby," he encourages as he supports your back with his hands. Per his instruction, you begin to grind back and forth on his bulge. Broken moans fill the room as his cock twitches against your clit but is unable to enter. He pulls back from your chest but continues to rub the hardened nub with his thumb. "Can I eat you out?" He looks up at you, his breathing heavy either from lack of oxygen or raw desire.

"Yeah," you pant out and he scoops you up into his arms effortlessly. He was very strong for a painter. He kisses you as he takes you into his bedroom before setting you on his bed.

He steps back, standing at the foot of the bed, and begins to unbutton his shirt, putting on a lovely show for you. The way his fingers skillfully slip each button through the little slit, his fingers long and sculpted his torso nice and tapered. He flings his shirt off his shoulders before tossing it somewhere in the room. He crawls up on the bed before grabbing your thighs.

"You're so wet," he breathes out, his breath hitting your folds in a sharp tingle. He runs his middle finger up your folds tenderly making you gasp. "So beautiful," he admires every aspect of your body as his fingers tease around your hole. He then puts his lips around your clit making you jump.

You grab a fistful of his hair as he slowly eats you out, licking up every ounce of arousal your body produces. He brings his finger down to wriggle into your pussy. "Good girl," he grins as he rests his head against your inner thigh, flicking his tongue out to attack your clit. His hair tickled your thigh and his body weight against your thigh added to the sensations. "You're doing so good for me darling," he kisses your clit as you feel his finger begin to thrust deeper and faster. "Have you ever squirted before?" He asks abruptly and you blush.

"N-No...I haven't," you admit shyly, already assuming his bold intent.

"How interesting," Hyunjin squeezes another finger inside you and you squirm slightly from the intrusion. He curls his fingers right against that sweet spot that has your gut tied in knots. You moan softly, growing louder and louder by the minute, and Hyunjin smirks. "That's it, feel the pleasure darling," his encouragement was much appreciated and in a way helped you draw closer to your impending release.

Before you knew it a rush of heat coursed through your body and it honestly startles you. The pleasure was overwhelmingly intense, so warm and tingly.

"H-Hyunjin," you warn him, your breathing heavy.

"Don't worry, let it out," he sucks on your clit and you let out a cry as you feel fluid gushing from your cunt. It spurts out onto Hyunjins face and chest and it takes you a moment to realize what had happened.

"I-Im so sorry I-" you got to sit up but Hyunjin quickly rests you back down.

"Relax darling," he pets your thigh softly. "After such an intense high you should relax," he smiles warmly and you pause before nodding, laying back again. "How did it feel to squirt for the first time?" He asks as he dries himself off with a nearby towel, conveniently placed by his bedside.

"I-oh yeah...um it was..." you think of how to describe it for a moment.

"Overwhelming?" He tilts his head and you laugh softly.

"Yeah, definitely that but also...beautiful," you smile blissfully, basking in the afterglow.

"That's good, I'm glad darling," he kisses your forehead. "Are you feeling tired or do you want to continue? Either way I'm as happy as a clam," he smiles sincerely...

Please reply or drop a comment in my inbox if you'd like part 2 🙏

[daycourtofficial]

Capture the Mate

Summary: Azriel has to leave on a mission for a few days, but he asks Cassian to help look after his pregnant mate while he’s gone. Someone ambushes you and Cassian, taking you as prisoner.

Author’s note: this was requested by this lovely anon!!

“You look massive today.”

You snort at Cassian as you walked in, your giant belly making sitting down a bit difficult.

“And you look extra stupid today,” you retort, “guess we’re both glowing.”

Cassian laughs, going back to his cereal. You were in the last few months of your pregnancy and you were ready to meet your baby. You loved being pregnant, you loved how hot sex with your mate was because of it, you loved cradling your bump and the way your mates hands always find your bump.

But you didn’t love Cassian’s comments comparing you to a whale, the back pain, the inability to get comfortable, and your mate’s overprotectiveness being dialed up by a factor of a thousand.

Azriel was going on fewer missions these days due to your pregnancy, opting to delegate most of them to his most trusted spies. There are occasionally some missions he has to do himself, not happy about leaving you, practically throwing temper tantrums in the lead up to being gone. When he comes home it’s as if he’s been off at war for decades, checking every inch of you, asking you about every detail of your time in his absence (even down to what you ate exactly - he thinks you don’t eat enough vegetables in his absence).

This is the fifth mission during your pregnancy he’s gone on, and each time he can’t bear to leave you without someone who can protect you. Whenever Azriel has to go, he ensures one of his brothers or Feyre will be present with you at all times. Whenever he’s gone, you just stay in your old room at the House of Wind or at Feyre and Rhys’s new house.

At first it sounded a bit like needing a babysitter, but now it’s more like just staying at someone’s house for a sleepover. Feyre and Nesta always tried to help you have fun, spending the days you’re with them doing the things you love. Cassian loves you being there because he likes to have eating competitions with you, and Rhys likes it because he spoils you rotten.

Before Azriel left, he spent probably an hour saying goodbye to you and the babe. He’d kiss you, then move down to talk to the babe. “Stay in there until I return,” he’ll whisper. “Be nice to your mom while I’m gone, okay? Let her sleep, I won’t be here to rub her back when you kick her in the kidneys.”

This time he actually tears up a bit at leaving the two of you. He looks at you, grabbing your face in his hands, “I shouldn’t be too long, sweetheart. Be safe, I love you.”

-

“Any plans for the day, Cass?”

“Mmm not really, I already had training, so my day is free to be spent with you, my favorite sister.”

You smile. “You say that to both me and Feyre,” you reply, rolling your eyes fondly.

Cassian lifts his spoon to finish off the last of his cereal. “It changes day by day - today you’re the favorite.”

-

You had asked Cassian if you two could go back to your home with Azriel, you had some chores to do and you also wanted to work on setting up the nursery.

Looking around the nursery you take in what needs to be done. A month out from the baby’s arrival and your mate still hasn’t set up the crib. But if you set it up without him he’d give you a big lecture about how he was going to do it and how you could get yourself hurt doing it, so you’ll just leave it be.

You have a dresser set up and a wardrobe that practically rivals your own, so you decide to spend the day folding and putting away baby clothes.

Cassian graciously offered to clean the dishes that were in the sink, along with sweeping and mopping your downstairs floors.

After telling him he didn’t have to do that, he responded, “well I don’t want dirty floors for Cassian Jr. here when he starts crawling, and I don’t want you mopping because if you slip you might hurt Cassian Jr.” He finished his statement by reaching out to rub your belly.

You rolled your eyes at him, as he smiles at your belly. “Cassian, aren’t Jr’s supposed to be named after their father or mother? Last I checked, this wasn’t your baby.”

He strokes his thumb over your bump, hoping to feel a kick from within, “we could convince Az it’s mine. I think it’d be hilarious.”

You snort, “he’d kill you in a heartbeat.”

Cassian sighs, “I suppose. Maybe the next one can be Cassian Jr.” He wiggles his eyebrows as he tries to look at you suggestively.

You fling your arms, bringing on of your hands to your forehead dramatically, “Oh Cassian your powers of seduction are too strong, I’m irresistibly drawn to you! I must flee, to keep myself from pouncing on you.”

Laughter from the both of you echoing through the house as you attempt to scuttle away but it becomes more of a waddle as you climb the stairs to your nursery.

-

An hour or two had passed and you made a remarkable dent in the amount of clothing your baby had. The vast amount of clothes are mostly Rhys’s fault, no one alive loves buying clothes more than that male, but your mate was also quite fond of picking up clothes on the rare occasions he left your side.

He loved watching how happy you got, realizing just how much he was thinking of you and the babe while gone.

You decide to go check on Cassian, not having heard much of anything from downstairs since you’ve been in the nursery. You waddle down the stairs, holding the railing for support. You get to the last step, and you see Cassian in your living room, face down, wings splayed out, blood gushing from his head onto your rug.

You yell for him as you run to him, sitting next to him, checking for a pulse. He’s still alive, but he has a considerable amount of blood.

You press on his head wound, trying to cradle his head in your lap to apply pressure to the wound. He’s starting to wake a little, you can feel his hands squeezing on your thighs.

A hand wraps around your neck from behind, and a cool metal graces the skin of your neck.

“Here’s the pretty little thing we were looking for.”

-

When Cassian came to, his head was pounding. He sat up on the floor of your living room, trying to assess the situation. He was mopping the floor of your kitchen when something struck the back of his head.

He never got a good look at the assailant, the blow leaving him stuck on the floor. He was, however, able to crawl into your living room in an effort to reach you.

You.

You had cradled his head, you had come down here.

Cassian bolts up, causing him to go a little dizzy from the blood loss. He gets up, darting up your stairs.

“Sunshine? Are you here?”

He ran into the nursery, checking all the spots you could be hiding in there - the wardrobe, the closet, amongst the bags and boxes littering the floor.

His panic was starting to rise. “Sunshine, are you here? It’s me, Cassian.” The desperation was leaking through his voice, “please be here, it’s okay to come out.”

He combed through your shared bedroom with Azriel, checked every bathroom, Azriel’s study, your spare room, your library, the kitchen.

He combed through his memories, knowing Azriel kept hidden nooks everywhere. When the two of you moved in together, he remembered Azriel made several small pockets in this house so you could hide if anything were to happen.

You came to training, but you were no warrior. You couldn’t hurt anyone, and Azriel knew you’d have a hard time attacking anyone. He knew that Azriel drilled into you if anything were to happen to hide immediately.

The library.

It’s Cassian’s last hope. Of course Azriel had stuck a hidden panic room in the library. Cassian bound into the room, trying to remember what book it was that opened the secret entrance.

Combing the spines, he’s trying to remember. It was green, something that stands out a little, but not too much. Something someone who knew Azriel would know that this is off.

A book of Prythian maps. Azriel, Rhys, and Cassian had all of Prythian memorized, there was no need for it.

He slides the book from its spot, watching the case move, exposing the empty tiny room.

-

Cassian wasted no time jumping off your balcony, flying like a bat of hell to Rhys and Feyre’s house, screaming mentally, hoping Rhys would pick up on it.

He lands on their balcony, bursting into Rhys’s study, interrupting the intimate moment between them. Feyre was perched on his lap, feeding him grapes, Cassian’s entrance causing her to drop the bowl, the ceramic shattering on the ground, a dozen or so grapes spilling across the floor.

“Cassian!” Feyre yells in shock. She didn’t even know anyone else could burst into Rhys’s office.

Rhys stands up, immediately knowing something was wrong. “Where is she, Cass?”

Cassian points to his head, allowing Rhys to see everything. Your rug he stared at after the blow to his head, hearing your distress, him going in and out, feeling your hands press against his wound, him waking up alone, his frantic search of your house.

Feyre gasps, having also seen all of it.

“Bring Azriel home now.”

-

Your captors had thrown a bag over your head, not allowing you to see anything as they took you away from your home, away from Cassian bleeding on your rug.

They left Cassian, probably as a message that they could take him down if they wanted, but that he wasn’t who they wanted.

Your only hope is that Cassian wakes up soon enough and alerts Rhys and Feyre about what happened, and they could get into contact with your mate.

You were filled with a mix of emotions, between fear, concern, and anger. Afraid for your life, what your captors will do to you, concern for your unborn baby, and anger for Azriel.

Azriel closes off the bond between you two during missions, a decision you both agreed to. However, the second he is available, he opens it, letting you know how he is. Your biggest hope now is just sending him how you’re feeling, hoping he’ll feel that you’re alive whenever he reopens the connection.

They had picked you up and flown you somewhere, so they’re most likely Illyrian.

They land, not nearly as gracefully as your mate or his brothers, emitting a soft ‘oof’ from your lips.

They carry you for at least ten minutes, through what you assume is decently packed area.

Are you in one of the camps?

You knew relations between Rhys and the Illyrians were bad, but would they really kidnap the spymaster’s mate?

Your thoughts are interrupted when you realize they’ve brought you into a building and have set you down in a chair, shackling you to it.

You haven’t spoken a word, barely eliciting a sound, just like your mate would do. You’re not sure if it’s what you should do, but the thought of what he would do holds you together.

You have to be strong, for yourself, for Azriel, for the baby.

They pull the bag off your head, your pupils dilating due to the sudden change in light. Four Illyrian warriors stood before you, 11 siphons glowing throughout the room.

“Hello, beautiful.”

The one who had been carrying you and taken you from your home approached you, caressing your face. You kept a stoic, neutral expression, not letting anything slip.

Just like Azriel would.

Your only response is the eye contact you refuse to break with him.

“That piece of shit struck gold when the cauldron bonded you to him,” practically spitting out the last word.

“Your little shadowsinger won’t stop snooping around our camps, won’t stop telling his precious little high lord everything he sees. They’ve been meddling in the way we deal with our women, the way we govern ourselves. We thought it was time to uh explain to them why they should just stay in their precious little city and leave us alone.”

-

The second the words left Cassian’s lips, Rhys was trying to reach Azriel telepathically. Within seconds of Cassian’s words, darkness was clouding the room, creating an impenetrable black, the only light shining being several blue siphons glowing with rage.

Cassian recounted the whole thing to the darkness, knowing his brother was somewhere in there. Once he got to the part of the story where you were gone, the room exploded even further, making Azriel’s siphons impossible to see now.

A few shadows whiz by Cassian, he’s assuming to double check you aren’t in their home. The rage Azriel feels is coming off in waves, when he remembers the bond is still closed.

He closes his eyes, sending a silent prayer to the mother. Please, please, please.

The bond opens, your warmth filling his chest. He can feel the initial fear you felt at being taken, but he can also feel your constant reassurance that you and the baby are okay.

Azriel feels his eyes prickle with tears as he chokes out, “they’re alive.” His brothers reach out to hug him or soothe him, but he steps back, his male instincts kicking in.

“I can feel it,” he says, holding a hand up, “the protectiveness is ramping up. I want to kill any male in sight.”

Rhys and Cassian start protesting, telling Azriel they want to come with him, but he stops them again.

“Give me a five minute head start. Then I’ll give you my location.”

-

Your silence was an interesting strategy, one your captors did not like one bit, their irritation with you growing by the minute.

“Maybe we should rough her up then drop her back on their door step. Pretty loud and clear message, don’t you think?” He circles around your chair, sizing you up like prey.

“We could show her how women are supposed to be treated by us,” one in the corner shouts.

The one circling you spits at your feet before he says, “those half-breed bastards have gone soft, they forget what it means to be Illyrian.”

In a flash he steps forward, his hand slapping you across the face.

-

Azriel used the bond to find you. He kept tugging, the bond offering him a direction to go. He kept winnowing into the direction of the tug, when he began realizing where the bond was likely taking him. He growled with anger, unable to believe they could be so stupid as to take his mate.

He disappeared into his shadows, sending a few to find out exactly where you were. Once they returned, sans the two that wanted to stay with you, they whisked him away to the room you were being kept in.

The big one who had struck you earlier was mid-strike when the shadowsinger materialized out of the shadows in front of you, his hand catching the brute’s wrist.

“Lay another hand on my mate and your hands will become trophies I hang on the wall.”

You can feel his shadows enveloping you in a soothing wave, checking you head to toe for injuries, but only finding the stinging cheek and the pain from the shackles.

The twirl through your hair, eventually skating over your swollen belly, where they settle and stay.

Your mate’s shadows were very attentive of the baby in your belly, as if your unborn babe were calling to them, too. They reacted to everything the babe did, every kick, every movement, as if telling your babe, “we are here, little master.”

The anger radiating off of Azriel was palpable, but his demeanor was terrifying. A feralness to him you’ve never seen before.

“Whose idea was this?”

Nobody in the room speaks, the assailants just gaping at your mate.

“Speak.”

One of them points to the leader, the one whose wrist was still in Azriel’s hand.

Azriel looks into the male’s eyes, piercing through his soul, as he flicks his arm, breaking the male’s arm.

He screams, shocked at the swiftness of the break. Azriel takes the moment of surprise to pull the first assailant’s head into his knee, bashing his head into his kneecap, throwing him on the ground.

He looks to the next closest one, tilting his head, deciding how he wants to play this. He decides to leave truth-teller sheathed at his side, opting instead to use his bare hands.

“I wanted to savor this, however I don’t want to keep my mate waiting,” he states, coming up to the next closest one and swiftly wrapping his hands around his head, twisting until a sickening crack echoes through the room.

One of them lunges for Azriel, fists raised to fight him. Azriel moves to the side, causing the running assailant to run into the wall behind the shadowsinger. Azriel grabs him by the back of his neck, pulling his arm back, and with all of his force, pushing his head into the wall. Over. And over. And over. His blood splattering the wall, an actual crack in the wall forming from where his head kept hitting it.

He releases his hold, allowing his body to fall to the floor. Azriel turns and looks at the last one, the one that had pointed to whose idea this was, as some of his shadows finally break free from you. “Now,” he says, as they begin pooling at the last captor’s feet, “I’ll deal with you later.”

The shadows at his feet begin pulling the male into the pool of darkness, assumingly to be questioned further about their failed plans.

Azriel undoes the shackles keeping you in place, hoisting you into his arms, the belly making it a bit more difficult.

The second he reopened the bond to find you, he began sending you a constant stream of love down it, trying to convey to you that he was on his way to you.

Being gathered in his arms, the bond was humming a sweet melody, a soft duet that can only be heard when you’re together.

He pulls back, grabbing your face in his hands. “I have never felt fear quite like I did when Rhys made me come back. I knew something was wrong, I was hoping that the babe had just come early.”

He puts his left hand on your belly, the babe inside kicking the exact spot his hand is in. Your mate laughs.

You look at him, seeing the fear and adrenaline in his eyes as he continues, “but when I got back and Cassian said they left him behind and took you, I thought ‘okay, if they’re gone, I have nothing left to live for.’”

“But then, I opened the bond, and I felt you, and I-“ he chokes up a bit, continuing, “I almost started crying. You were alive, and you were okay.”

He pulls your head in, kissing the top of your head several times.

“You’re both okay.”

You reached up, stroking his cheek, “we’re okay.”

He smiles, and you laugh, “I guess this means you’re never leaving my side again, huh?”

He laughs, a tear falling down his face as he does so. “Oh no, sweetheart. You thought I was overbearing before, just wait. You won’t remember what personal space was soon enough.”

You laugh, “at least tell me you aren’t upset with Cassian. He’s a sweet guard dog.”

He smiles at you, rubbing his thumb across your cheek. “They ambushed him, I could never be upset with him over that. Now come on, let’s go see my brother before he gives himself a heart attack with worry over you.”

“He is quite fond of me, isn’t he?” You ask, his arm going around you, preparing to embark through the shadows to go back home.

“He told me he prayed every night that we would be mates,” he says, the shadows beginning to engulf the two of you.

“Why?” You ask, wrapping your arms around him.

Azriel looks into your eyes as he says, “he told me he never thought anyone was good enough for me until he met you.”

[daydreaming-nerd]

The Angel of Music (Azriel x Reader)

AN: guys this is always one of my emotional support movies/plays I’ve seen it a million times so it only seemed fair that I give it the ACOTAR collab it deserves. 

Summary: It was the inner circles first time at the theater and from the way the Shadowsinger was blushing they all had a feeling it wouldn’t be the last. (the reader plays Christine Daae in Velaris’ adaptation of The Phantom Of The Opera and Azriel falls in love with her, but he’s afraid that she won’t like him because of his scars because she choose Raoul in the play) Set between ACOWAR and AOFAS

Warnings: Angst because of Azriel’s scars, shy az, but so much fluff, (just a little Az brain rot, didn't take this too seriously)

Word Count: 3,070

It wasn’t the shadowsinger's usual scene. Bustling people dressed to the nines, plush red chairs, gold sconces, orchestras. But Cassian had been tirelessly trying to make Nesta smile, and Ferye wanted to try and get her sisters together, so here he sat in the box that Rhysand had purchased for the night. 

Nesta loved the music and dancing, Elain loved the romance, and Feyre loved the costumes and color palettes of scenes. Cassian wanted to see Nesta smile, and Rhysand would do just about anything Feyre asked of him. 

In all his 500 years of life, Azriel had never thought to go to the theater. When he was a child he heard of his parents going but of course, he never got to go. As he grew the idea of going to see a show simply never crossed his mind.

When the lights went down and the orchestra came to life he spent most of his time watching Cassian, who was watching a very intrigued Nesta. He stayed that way until a clap and a spark echoed throughout the room. At first, he thought there was danger, but as soon as he turned his attention towards the stage he saw the large chandelier raise itself to life bringing the dilapidated stage with it. Golds, reds, and vibrant colors filled the room. 

Still, Azriel had trouble following the plot. But as he watched Nesta and her sisters become entranced by the music and dancing. The loud organ had stirred something in him, but he didn’t truly feel moved until her. 

Think of me, think of me fondly when we’ve said goodbye…

Azriel was sitting in a box at the edge of the theater, but even from this distance, he could tell that she was the most beautiful female he had ever seen.  He scooted to the edge of his seat a tad just to be that much closer to her. Her voice was that of a siren, no not a siren, an angel. His shadows danced around his ears and his wings at the sound of her ballad. Even the rest of the inner circle seemed to be entranced by her spell. 

As the play went on he found himself becoming irrationally jealous of Raoul. The pretty Viscount had not given her a second look at the beginning of the play. It wasn’t until the organ sounded again that the sound of her voice graced Azriel’s ears. The woman walked through a mirror towards a masked man. 

Who was this masked man? Where was he taking her? It wasn’t until Mor rested her hand to where he was gripping his chair with white knuckles that he remembered it was just a play. He sat back in his seat more, trying to tell his shadows to calm down. But as her voice climbed and climbed that beautiful crescendo they twisted and turned around him. 

Azriel spent the rest of the play being utterly entranced by the beautiful singer’s relationship with the Phantom. The masked man was dark and radical, staying in the shadows where no one could see him. He observed her from afar. Much like the shadowsinger did himself in every aspect of his life. 

It was clear to him that the Phantom was in love with Christine. So when Raoul and Christine kissed he nearly felt his heart shatter. The way the Phantom mourned, and cried, it felt all too personal to Azriel. 

I  gave you my music, made your way. And now how you’ve repaid me, denied me and betrayed me…

  From there on out Azriel found himself rooting for the Phantom, the man he saw so much of himself in. He nearly shed a tear when he found out why the man wore a mask. A scared child in a cage made to perform. 

He looked down at his mangled hands sitting on the arms of his chair. He had known a similar childhood and had suddenly wished he had something like a mask to cover such torn flesh. Maybe then the beautiful woman on stage might look at him with that same lovesick gaze, she wore now for Raoul, but he knew that could never be.

For a moment he felt joy, seeing her kiss the Phantom with such passion, such love. Only for that joy to be extinguished like a candle when she walks out with the Viscount. Of course, she would choose him, life does imitate art after all. It wasn’t until the curtain went down and the crowd erupted in thunderous applause that Azriel broke from his trance, standing to applause with them. 

“Well that was wonderful,” Feyre beamed, linking her arm with Rhysand’s. 

“I’ll say, that girl sang like an angel,” Mor gushed, fanning herself with her program as we all made our way out of the box. “Even Azriel seemed to enjoy it,” the female smirked, bumping Azriel with her shoulder. She had seen the lovesick gaze in his eyes. 

“It was so romantic the way Raoul came to rescue her,” Elain swooned, grabbing her sister's other arm. 

“Oh please, the Phantom was the obvious choice!” Nesta huffed at her sister's comment. 

“Nesta, would you like to meet the cast? Maybe talk to some of the dancers?” Feyre asked, changing the subject quickly before conflict arose. 

Nesta thought for a moment and spoke again, “Yes I would.” all she said. 

Of course, it was an easy task for Rhys to sweet-talk his way backstage, the inner circle sticking out like a sore thumb as they weaved past props, costumes, and the ensemble. Azriel’s eyes stayed ever vigilant, unable to let go of years of training as they walked down a dark hall. A cast member opened a door at the end of the hall to reveal mirrors with glimmering faelights around them. Vanities with every manor of makeup and costume jewelry. Two men he recognized as the actors who played the Viscount and the Phantom. 

The Phantom had washed off the makeup that made his face look scarred. Once again Azriel wished he too had that ability. Rhys and Feyre shook both their hands introducing them to the whole inner circle, but Azriel paid no mind. His hazel eyes were searching for a hint of her.

“Oh y/n there’s someone who wants to meet you!” called out one of the actors. 

“Oh, really who?” called a voice so melodic Azriel just knew that she had to be an angel. 

His shadows wisped around him frantically, calling out her name in his ear, like they were excited to finally know it. Rhys and Feyre’s eyes looked to their friend and smiled at one another. 

She walked around from a changing screen, tying the strings of the robe she was wearing that looked similar to the one she had worn on stage. She nearly stopped in her tracks as she saw her High Lord and Lady staring at her. 

“My Lord, My Lady,” she bows. “It is an honor.”

“No, no, please don’t bow,” Feyre rushes over, bringing the singer upright. “If anything we should be bowing to you. You sang like a goddess out there, you are truly talented.”

“Why thank you, my Lady, I’m truly happy you enjoyed the show,” she smiled and Azriel’s heart all but glowed. 

“Please call me Feyre,” the High Lady smiles, extending her hand. 

“Y/n,” the singer replied, taking her hand and shaking it. 

Azriel kept to the sidelines as the inner circle conversed with the cast and crew. Feyre and Rhys praised the play director and claimed they would be purchasing their box for the rest of the season. Nesta picked the brains of the dancers and their instructor, Cassian listening dutifully behind her. Elain chatted up the Phantom and Raoul, both actors seemingly falling for her, once again showing how life imitates art. 

Mor talked to y/n, about what? Azriel didn’t know. But the second Mor caught Az gazing at y/n she held out a hand to him. 

“Y/n I’d like you to meet Azriel, spymaster for the night court,” Mor said, beckoning Azriel over. 

Azriel quickly put his hands behind his back, not wanting to scare her with his scars. He could’ve sworn he saw her cheeks tint a shade pinker as he approached, looming over her in size. 

“How do you do?” y/n asks.

It takes a second for Azriel to realize that her angelic voice is speaking to him.

“Oh um, very well thanks.” he stutters, already feeling like a fool. Gods she was even more beautiful up close, he found himself suddenly longing for the box that offered him sanctuary, or a mask like the Phantom had. 

“Did you um, enjoy the show?” she probed and Azriel realized that Mor had conveniently dismissed herself. 

“I did,” he said quickly. “You have a beautiful voice, I could’ve listened all night.” 

Once again he swore he saw y/n blush as she looked down at her feet, “Thank you, though I think I fell flat a little in the first song. Opening night and all,” she laughed nervously and oh Cauldron, the sound of her laughter was enough to make Az take one step towards her. 

“No it was perfect, all of it.” he spat out, not standing to hear her say one more bad thing about herself. 

“Well thank you Azriel,” she said and by the fucking Cauldron she smiled at him. His name fell off her perfect lips and she smiled at him. He must’ve been dead and somehow gotten to heaven, there was no other explanation. 

The rest of the inner circle watched the pair intently. Feyre sank further into Rhysand’s side as they both realized they were watching Azriel fall in love in real-time. The yin and yang of the pair was near poetic and Feyre told herself she would pain this exact moment tomorrow morning. 

“Y/n why don’t you come to dinner with us? We would love to hear more about you,” Rhysand smiled.

His words broke the trance y/n was in, “Oh my Lord I truly wish I could, but I have an early day tomorrow and my apartment is clear across town.” She apologized. 

“No worries, it sounds like we will all be back for tomorrow night's show as well. Though I would hate for you to walk home alone,” Rhys smirked trying to get Azriel to bite at the bait.

“Not to worry I make the trek all the time,” she smiled, picking up the many vases of flowers people had left for her on her vanity. 

“Azriel could walk you home, couldn’t you Az?” Mor chimed in and Azriel shot her a look. 

“Uh, yeah I could if you’d like,” Azriel mentioned stuttering over his words as he scratched the back of his neck. 

“Oh no I wouldn’t want to take you from dinner with your family,” she assured him, picking up two large vases of flowers. 

“Not at all, I would be honored to walk you home,” the shadowsinger said a little too quickly. Feyre tried to stifle her laugh in Rhys’ side, she had never seen her spymaster so flustered. 

“Okay then,” the girl smiled and soon enough they were off down the cobblestone street, their way lit by dim faelight. 

y/n’s pov:

“Your shadows are incredible,” I smile watching as the dark wisps carry the various vases of flowers down the road. 

I had been more than happy to have the High Lord’s shadowsinger walk me home. In all honesty, I was captivated by the male the moment I set eyes on him. Sure he was hard, dressed in black, and over a foot taller than me. 

A sane woman might’ve kept her distance from the male, he was dangerous after all. But I knew the moment he spoke that he wasn’t a threat. There was a quiet and gentle calm underneath all that darkness.

“Thank you,” he says and I swear I see him blush. “They seem to really like you.” 

“They do? How can you tell?” I laugh as one of the little fellas brush against my cheek like a cat brushing against an ankle. 

“They went wild when you were singing tonight,” he chuckles, seemingly remembering how they danced. 

“Really?” I ask balking a bit. 

“I’m serious, give it a try,” he smiles, motioning for me to sing again. 

I shrug and clear my throat before singing a line from the play, “Angel of Music, hide no longer. Come to me, strange angel,” I sang softly and sure enough the little shadows danced and swirled around me. Threading themselves through my hair and around my arms where they held my vases of flowers. 

“That’s amazing,” I breathe finally watching the small wisps die down, hiding behind their master like they were shy. 

“You’re amazing,” their master spits out and then blushes. ‘

I can’t help but feel myself blush too, shying away from the hulking Illyrian. He didn’t look so tough as his shadows carried dozens of flowers behind him. He had walked down the street with his hands behind his back the whole time, not needing to lift a finger. 

The little purple door I’m so used to seeing comes into view. Outside the cottage are dozens and dozens of roses and the light inside is out. 

“I leave these here,” I say gesturing to the flowers I’m holding as I set them on the front porch. 

“Why not take them home? Were they not gifted to you?” Azriel cocks an eyebrow as his shadows place the flowers neatly next to the ones I set down. 

I laugh starting back down the path towards my place, “I get so many, I can’t possibly keep them all. Marla is an elderly woman who lost her husband years ago. It brings her joy to have them, so I leave them for her. Besides it’s not like they’re from anyone special,” I shrug, subtly dropping the hint to Azriel that I’m not otherwise engaged. 

Azriel pauses beside me and approaches a rose bush blooming near one of the cottages. Drawing his dagger, he carefully slices off a vibrant red rose. Before offering it to me, he painstakingly removes every thorn with the same blade, as if to protect my hands from even the slightest prick.

“You deserve to have at least one flower,” he says offering me the rose. 

I blush and go to reach for it when I catch sight of his hand. The mangled and marred flesh. I can’t help but feel my breath hitch as I wonder who could’ve done such a thing to such a gentle soul. The scarred hand pulls back a bit as if realizing my staring. 

“I guess I’m more Phantom than dashing Viscount,” he utters sadly, referring to my play and my role in it. My heart shatters as I see his broken expression. 

“You know,” I smile, taking the rose from his scarred hands. “I always thought that Christine should end up with The Phantom, he was clearly the better choice.” 

His head whips up as if I’ve uttered an inconceivable phrase. “Even though he had ugly scars?” Azriel inquires, his face tight like he might not want to hear whatever answer I provide.

“Who said he was ugly?” I laugh, did this beautiful specimen of a male truly believe he was ugly because his hands bore scars? 

“So you would choose the Phantom?” he cocks an eyebrow as if trying to read if I was telling the truth.

“In a heartbeat,” I affirm confidently and honestly.

He takes a step towards me, his form getting even bigger, “and what about scarred hands? Is that a deal breaker?” he probes, holding out his hands so I can see that they both harbor similar markings.  

I shake my head taking another step towards him, appreciating the beauty that is him. From the white scars that ran up his hands, to the shadows that danced around him like they they were whispering to him.

“So if I asked you to dinner after your show tomorrow?” he queries taking a step towards me as well.

“I would ask you where we are going?” I reply feeling my cheeks heat up. Was he asking me out? I tried to push the butterflies down in my stomach.

“Rita’s ?” he shrugs, stepping forward. 

“Sounds like a plan,” I smile moving towards him more, like I was compelled to.

“I’ll swing backstage after the curtain closes,” he smiles, seemingly becoming more confident in himself as we step closer together just a few feet apart.

“I’ll put your name on the list,” I say, feeling his presence pull me in. 

“And if I were to send you flowers? What kind would you like?” he interrogates further. 

I think for a moment, no one had ever asked me what flowers I might like to receive. My eyes look around as if searching for inspiration until they land on a blue siphon adorning his chest that’s right in front of me. 

“Something blue,” I blush knowing that when I see the cobalt flowers on my vanity I will know they are from him. 

“Consider it done,” he smiles and I suddenly realize that we’re mere inches apart now. 

I turn to my right where the blue door to my house beckons to be opened. Pulling out my keys I unlock it and use my shoulder to shove it open as it always gets stuck. 

“Well,” I say shyly. “Thank you for walking me home,” 

“Anytime,” he smiles looking down at his feet. 

The sight of the bashful warrior on my front doorstep has me melting. His face is so beautiful and perfectly carved I can't help but lean up on my toes and kiss his cheek. I almost regret it when it’s over but the violent red of his cheeks makes me smile again.

“Well goodnight,” I say, trying not to let my words shake in the process. 

“Goodnight,” he smiles, brushing a hand against his freshly kissed cheek.

I close the door and place the single, thornless, rose he cut for me in a vase. It isn’t until I turn on a light that I hear him take off into the night and I swear I hear him let out a grand whoop from way up in those clouds.

Permanent Taglist: @fides25, @dissociated-always @crystalferret202 , @kennedy-brooke , @sunshineangel-reads , @lilah-asteria , @evergreenlark , @cheneyq

[daemour]

Pairing: poly! WooSan x gn! Reader

Word Count: 4587

Warnings: cursing, implied sexual activity, arguing

Genre: Angst, fluff, hurt/comfort, established relationship, T for teen

Summary: In a relationship with Wooyoung and San, you feel left out of their activities. One evening, it all blows up.

this is my baby :') (yes i keep saying that about my fics) but i spent a lot of time on this and i think its one of my best works lol,,,,i hope u enjoy! i do have a second, shorter, part with the aftermath if you'd be interested

thank you to @hobeemin for betaing <3

You’re sitting on the couch with two pairs of legs in your lap. To anyone else, it would look like a sweet scene. Your boyfriends cuddling while you watch them fondly. But you’ve never felt so alone before.

You knew you were the addition to the relationship—San and Wooyoung had been dating for a long while before they met you, and it took another few years for them to ask you to join their relationship. After crushing on the two of them for so long, you had leapt at the chance to.

At first, you were just happy to be there—to have them smile at you sweetly, hold your hand, and press you into the sheets so well. But as time passed, it felt like being there was all you had to be happy about.

Sometimes, you wonder if you had just misconstrued the whole thing. Maybe they just wanted a roommate they could fool around with. Or you’re just reading too much into it. It’s only been six months since you were invited into the relationship.

As you’re contemplating your relationship with the two, your boyfriends stand. You only notice because of the weight leaving your body. “Hey, babe, Sannie and I are going to the bedroom, okay?”

“Oh– is there anything I can do too?” The desperation in your voice is evident, and you hate that it is. San’s eyes soften but both he and Wooyoung chuckle. Not meanly, but not kindly.

“Not today. Enjoy the movie.”

They each drop a kiss on the top of your head, and just like that, you watch them slip right through your fingers again.

You do your best to sit there and not feel upset; you try, but the pinch in your heart doesn’t go away. They’ve never been so outwardly…dismissive of you, and you’ve had quite enough of it. After a long five minutes of unhappy thoughts swirling around your head, you stand. You’re not sitting around and letting yourself feel like the second (or third) fiddle.

You blink back the angry tears threatening to fall as you pull on your sweatshirt and search for your phone, only to remember you left it on the bedside table. You’re not about to barge in on and grab it so you settle with your keys. You won’t be out for too long anyway.

As you leave the apartment, you do your best to close the door behind you as quietly as possible. The crisp fall air clears your mind, and you can think properly about your relationship. You just cannot allow yourself to continue to hurt like this. They’re a package deal to you and will come hand-in-hand with you in your life. You may love them, and they may be fond of you, but in the end, you’re just a plus one. 

The realisation hits you like a ton of bricks, and you clap a hand over your mouth to muffle the sob that escapes. It hurts you deeply, and you don’t want it to be true. You want to believe they need you just as much as you need them, although you know the thought is futile.

You shudder as you finally let your sobs calm down, and your heart returns to a normal pace. You can’t stay there much longer if you don’t want to lose yourself. As you head back to the apartment, you hurriedly wipe your eyes and clear your throat, unwilling for San and Wooyoung to see the state you’re in.

But that proves unnecessary—when you walk back in, San is sitting on the couch, a new movie is on the screen, and Wooyoung is prepping dinner. A quick glance at the clock tells you that you’ve been gone for about an hour and a half. Your blood boils as you realise they hardly noticed your disappearance, but you force it back to your gut. Blowing up now would be counter-productive.

Your phone is right where you left it, but as you try to escape, San calls out for you, “Oh, YN. Woo and I wanted to ask…” Your breath catches in your throat, hoping for something. “Do you want to join us next time?”

It takes all of your willpower not to laugh. “No, I don’t think I will.” Such a tone of mockery had never left your mouth directed at them before, and you snap your mouth shut before you say something else. San’s eyebrow rises high into his hairline.

You hear Wooyoung chuckle from the kitchen. “That’s fine. We have more fun without you anyway.”

And you know, deep down, he didn’t mean it maliciously. Wooyoung doesn’t have a mean bone in his body. He was just trying to be funny and lighten the mood from the tension he had heard in your voice. But he didn’t know he (and San) was the cause of the stress, and all he does is relight the anger in your gut.

“Oh, so I’ve realised,” you mutter, and this time, San’s other brow raises, and he interrupts.

“What do you mean by that?” He moves to cross his arms, and you scoff.

“I’m sure you know damn well what I mean, Choi San. I get it. You guys have been dating for…longer than you’ve known me. It’s understandable you guys sometimes just want to be together without me.” You pause to take a breath, and San looks just about constipated. “But…I genuinely cannot remember the last time the three of us went on a date or included me in anything other than just sex. And even that, once in a while. What is the point of me being here?”

“Why didn’t you just talk to us?” Wooyoung asks, having moved from the kitchen to stand in the doorway. His brows are furrowed, and he looks so confused that you almost want to forget your argument. But it’s gone too far already, and words won’t stop pouring out of your mouth.

“You would rethink your already comfortable relationship for me? Don’t be silly.” You cut off Wooyoung’s attempted argument. “Maybe you would’ve thought about it, but come on. I’m me. I’ve known you guys for four years; you’ve been dating for seven. I asked to join you guys all the damn time, but all I got was getting brushed off. Forgive me for not having the confidence to confront you two.”

You run your hand through your hair, blinking back your tears. “I can’t imagine this relationship without you guys, but to you two? I’m just an afterthought,” you state, shaking your head.

Before your soft heart gets the better of you and you fall to your knees and take it all back, you turn right back out the door, your phone clutched in your hands this time. Wooyoung and San make no move to go after you, and it hurts more than it should.

You’re not in the mood to walk and wallow, so you sit in the parking garage, ordering a taxi. As you wait for your ride, you hear footsteps thundering up to you, and you know what’s coming.

“Are you actually leaving?” San’s voice comes from behind you, a tightness to it you haven’t heard before.

You keep your eyes forward and nod. “Yes. I need some time to myself. I…I won’t leave forever, at least not for now. I don’t want to give us up, but I need time to rest my heart. And you guys need time to process, I’m sure.”

The taxi you called is pulling up now, and you stand. After hesitating, you turn around and wrap your arms around San’s waist. There’s no wait on his side; his warm and strong arms come around your shoulders to squeeze you gently. Your eyes are shut tightly, knowing that if you open them, you’ll want to go right back up to the apartment.

“Tell Wooyoung I said ‘sorry’,” you manage to choke out, and you can practically hear San’s melancholic smile.

“You have nothing to apologise for, but I will if it makes you feel better. The only reason he didn’t come down is because he didn’t want to overwhelm you.” San sighs, running a hand through his hair. “For whatever it’s worth, I’m sorry we’ve made you feel so alone. It was never our intention, but that doesn’t excuse the fact that it happened.”

You sometimes wish San wasn’t so sweet and lovely and perfect. And you sure wish Wooyoung didn’t feel as strongly as he did. If they cared less, it would’ve made your hurt and betrayal less sharp in your chest. But you don’t want them to be guilty, and you don’t want Wooyoung to cry.

“I…won’t be gone for long,” is all you have left to say to San before you cram yourself into the taxi, and will your tears to not fall until you get into the safety of your apartment that doesn’t even feel like home.

As soon as you reach your apartment, you collapse to your knees and cry. With every sob, your chest heaves and your throat aches. But you’re finally able to let out all your hurt, and after an hour or so, you feel as refreshed as you can be. You hope it will work out in the end for your sake and theirs.

—

You sink into the familiar comfort of your couch, a sigh escaping your lips as the silence of your apartment envelops you. It's been two weeks since the tearful confrontation with San and Wooyoung, two weeks since you've allowed yourself to feel the full weight of your emotions. The initial relief of expressing your pent-up frustrations has given way to a dull ache of longing and uncertainty.

Days turn into nights, and the silence stretches, punctuated only by the occasional text message from San and Wooyoung, their words a mix of apologies, reassurance, and pleas for you to come back. You read and reread their messages, your heart torn between the desire to run back into their arms and the fear of being hurt again.

Yeosang, your closest friend, becomes your lifeline during this time, his presence a comforting anchor amidst the storm of your emotions. He listens patiently as you pour out your doubts and fears, offering his unwavering support and gentle guidance. "They miss you, you know," he often reminds you softly, his eyes reflecting a deep understanding of your inner turmoil.

"I miss them too," you admit, your voice barely a whisper. "But what if it's not enough? What if we can't bridge the gap that's grown between us?"

Yeosang squeezes your hand reassuringly. "You won't know until you try. They're willing to work on things, YN. Don't let your fear rob you of a chance at happiness."

His words echo in your mind, a constant reminder that you can't stay hidden forever. You need to confront your fears, to have that difficult conversation, and to decide whether the love you share is strong enough to overcome the challenges you face.

As the days pass, you find yourself slowly emerging from the cocoon of your self-imposed isolation. You start venturing out, meeting friends for coffee, taking walks in the park, trying to rediscover a sense of normalcy amidst the chaos of your emotions.

But the longing for San and Wooyoung never truly fades. It lingers in the quiet moments, in the empty spaces beside you on the couch, in the memories that flood your mind when you least expect them.

Finally, after what feels like an eternity, you call Yeosang, asking him to meet up with you for coffee so that you can figure out how to approach your relationship with San and Wooyoung. He agrees readily, and promises to set aside some time at lunch tomorrow to hear you out.

“You miss them, too.” You blink at Yeosang’s statement, before heaving a sigh and taking a sip of your drink. As usual, he doesn’t waste time with small talk and just starts with the point of the meet-up. “You’re putting off this discussion for far too long, YN.”

And he’s right, as he usually is. It’s been about two weeks since the breakdown, and you’ve managed to avoid most attempts at reaching you, placating them with a ‘soon’ whenever they text you to ask. But you’re a little too scared to reopen the conversation. What if they hate you and don’t want you anymore?

“They don’t hate you,” Yeosang interrupts your spiralling with an all-knowing look. You swear he can read your mind, and he swears you’re just easy to read. “You both just need to have a long conversation. Of course, it may not work out properly, but if not, they need to know it for future reference.”

You bite your lip, sighing like the weight of the world rests upon your shoulders. “Stop being so smart, okay? I know I should. I’m just…I don’t know how to start.”

Yeosang raises an eyebrow. “First, you should set up a date to talk. I recommend calling them.” He easily dodges your slap. “Seriously, YN. I can’t tell you what to say. Just go talk to them properly. They’re not gonna be unreasonable. They like you.”

If you sighed anymore, Yeosang would probably smack you himself. “Fine. I’ll call them tomorrow.” Yeosang narrows his eyes, and you know he’s seen right through your lie.

“Call them now. I won’t bother you or be loud.”

You start to whine, but Yeosang fixes you with such a glare that you pull out your phone begrudgingly. Your hands tremble as you dial Wooyoung's number, knowing San would probably be at work right now. The phone rings once, twice, and your heart squeezes in hope and disappointment that he hasn’t picked up yet.

You’re just about to hang up when the phone picks up, and Wooyoung’s breathy voice crackles over the receiver. “Hello? YN?” He sounds like he just ran a marathon, and you can’t help but smile. The sound of his voice on the other end of the line sends a wave of warmth through you, a bittersweet reminder of the love you've been missing.

“Hey, Wooyoung. Sorry for never getting back to you guys.” You can already feel the awkwardness and tension through the phone call. “Uh…when are you guys free to talk?”

You can hear the eagerness in Wooyoung’s voice as he responds almost immediately. “Don’t apologise, YN, okay? San and I are free tonight after five. Would you like to come round to have dinner? I’m making spicy pork belly soup. If not, tomorrow evening also works at the same time. If you need more time.”

He’s one word away from practically begging on his knees, and you feel your heartstrings tug. “Yeah, tonight works if that’s okay. Is six-thirty okay?”

“Yes!” Wooyoung has no hesitation when he answers you. “Just come up whenever—you know the door code.”

“Okay, thank you again,” you say, seconds from hanging up when his voice cuts through the phone.

“YN. For what it’s worth, I’m sorry. And I’ll see you tonight.”

He ends the call before you can say anything else, and you’re left staring at the phone longingly. Yeosang’s chuckle brings you out of your thoughts. “Told you they don’t hate you,” he hums, a small smile on his lips, and you roll your eyes at him even though your heart warms.

“Should I bring a gift? Like wine or something? I don’t know…they’re feeding me. And it could be a peace offering.”

Yeosang laughs again, amused by your dilemma. “If you want to, it could be a nice gesture. But really, I think they just want to see you again.” He reaches over to you to squeeze your hand. “You guys will be just fine, okay?”

You nod, offering him your own crooked smile. “Thanks for sitting and talking, Sang. I appreciate it.” Your eyes dart to the side. “I should probably go see if I can find a proper bottle of wine, though.”

-

The bottle of wine in your hands is clutched so tightly you fear it may shatter in your sweaty grasp. You’re almost too scared to knock, but your longing to see your boyfriends (were they still your boyfriends?) overrides your fear, and you tap on the door lightly. It might be presumptuous to just walk in, even though Wooyoung told you they didn’t change the door code. You’ve done it many times before, but these circumstances are different.

Before you can chicken out and call it off, the door swings open, and San stands before you, his hair messy like it always ends when he tries to style it without help. Your fingers twitch as you keep yourself from reaching up to smooth it over. “...Hi,” you greet him instead, eyes flitting down to your hands. “I brought wine.”

“Thanks. Come on in. Wooyoung’s finishing up now.”

He steps aside, and you pass him, trying not to flinch as his comforting scent fills your brain. Oh, how you missed him and Wooyoung. The apartment is unchanged, and a picture of the three of you is still hung on the wall. “I hope you’ve been well?”

“Yea. I’ve been keeping busy.” San closes the door behind you, running a hand through his messy hair, which only serves to worsen it. “How about you?”

You shrug as casually as you can. “I’m doing well. Just been working…” There’s a long pause where neither of you knows what to do. “Do you need help with anything? Where do you want me to put the wine?”

San shrugs. “There’s not much to do. The table has already been set. Do you want to wash up or anything? I can pour the wine.”

You nod, handing over the bottle, being careful to avoid San’s touch before excusing yourself to the bathroom. You can practically hear the disappointed sigh leaving San’s mouth and you feel a sharp stab in your heart at how upset he seems to be but you remind yourself this is important. As Yeosang said, they have to be aware of what issues you’re having.

You glance at your weary face in the mirror, wiping at some smudged makeup and fixing your hair, taking any moment you can get to calm yourself down. When you can hear low murmurs in the kitchen of San and Wooyoung talking you know it’s about time for you to get out of the bathroom.

When you turn the corner into the kitchen, Wooyoung greets you with a tentative smile and a wake of his spatula. “Hey, YN. Hope you’re doing well. Are…are you hungry? It’s almost done.” Wooyoung speaks carefully like he’s triple-checking the words he wants to say before they come out of his mouth.

“Of course,” you laugh awkwardly. “Your food is always good. I hope you’re doing well too.”

It’s almost painful how tense the atmosphere is, and both you and Wooyoung cast a glance at San as if pleading silently for him to resolve it for you two. Before any of you guys can speak, the rice cooker beeps, slicing the thick stress in half and all three of you laugh. “Let’s eat,” San cheers, his eyes crinkling in the smile you missed.

The three of you move towards the seats, where three glasses of wine sit and side dishes are scattered around. Wooyoung holds the stew in his hands, setting it down in the middle of the table as you and San take your seats.

The dinner is mostly silent, aside from a couple of hums in delight at the taste of Wooyoung’s cooking. As much as you would deny it, you missed this. You missed being near them, being able to share the same space with them. As the three of you eat, you sneak glances at both San and Wooyoung. Aside from the tousled hair, San seems pretty put-together, with an easygoing smile on his face and dimples still prominent. But the dullness in his eyes is clear and he smiles and giggles way less than usual. Wooyoung’s face is lined with worry, hints of stubble peeking out, and you’re embarrassed to admit you find it attractive. His hands fiddle with his silverware as he eats, and the guilt returns to eat at your stomach.

“So…” you try and break the silence carefully, and both men’s eyes quickly focus on you. “...my brother’s boyfriend adopted a cat secretly and Hongjoong is livid, but I caught him cuddling with the cat just two days ago.”

San chuckles. “Sounds about right. Seonghwa definitely seems the type to. What, did he find the cat on the side of the road and ‘just couldn’t let it starve out there’?” You snort at San’s imitation of your brother.

“Almost spot on. It’s like Seonghwa is sitting right here, really.”

And with that, the conversation continues almost completely normally, like nothing had happened two weeks prior. Wooyoung prods at San’s cooking like always and you defend San but can’t help but throw in a jab of your own, one that San reaches over and pushes gently at your shoulder for.

At the touch, you freeze and Wooyoung’s eyes dart between the two of you. A long moment passes until you finally laugh stiffly and push him back. “What can I say? It’s true.”

Wooyoung smiles at the both of you, the corner of his lips crooked. “Good to see you take his side as always when it comes to cooking,” he teases. “Maybe I’ll make him cook next time.”

Next time. Your breath catches at those words and both San and Wooyoung take note of your hopeful reaction. “I’ll hold you to that.”

-

After dinner, all of you shuffle into the living room slowly, knowing exactly what must come. None of you want to start the conversation, but it must happen. You sit first, hands wringing in your lap. San and Wooyoung sit right next to each other, but not far from you.

“We could draw straws?” Wooyoung speaks up, his hands gripping the couch beside him. “To see who goes first.”

You don’t quite know how to react, but unlike the last time Wooyoung tried to be silly, you understand it isn’t coming from a place of malice. “I think that’s a great idea, Wooyoung,” both you and San agree, and although Wooyoung’s body tenses a tad more, his eyes soften.

“Thanks.”

With shaking hands, you hold out the straws Wooyoung had given you. Both San and Wooyoung draw, keeping their pick hidden until you pick yours. Long. San uncurls his hand and reveals his. Long.

Your gaze shifts to Wooyoung who looks just about ready to throw up at the prospect of going first. “Of course it’s me,” he laughs soullessly. “I suggested it, so I end up being first.”

“If you’re not comfortable–”

Wooyoung stops San with a quick squeeze of his hand. “No, it’s okay. I have a lot to say.” Without further ado, he turns to face you, his eyes pleading and his brows furrowed. “YN, I’m sorry. I was inconsiderate of you in the relationship, and although I meant no harm, I hurt you when I commented on ‘having more fun without you’. Although I tried to keep tension low, it only served to hurt you and I apologise for that. I should’ve been more attentive to you and considered how you may have felt when San and I went off to do our own thing without you.”

You feel a wave of relief wash over you, your heart warming at his heartfelt apology. “I really appreciate that, Wooyoung,” you hum. “I missed you a lot, and after a couple days of cooling down, I realised you meant no harm, and I could’ve told you how I felt about that with more maturity. I…I hope you don’t mind if I go next.”

San waves his hand, gesturing for you to go on. “Of course,” he agrees readily, squeezing Wooyoung’s hand gently.

“I’m sure my…complaints…about our dynamic were pretty clear. I felt left out, excluded, and separated from the two of you. And what I was feeling was valid, but my reaction wasn’t. I am sorry about how I went about talking to you guys. I assumed you wouldn’t care, and so I kept it to myself and let it boil over. And just running out on you guys was unfair of me. I didn’t explain, nor give you guys a chance to explain.”

San nods empathetically. “I was indeed hurt by your immediate assumption that we wouldn’t care. I thought it was clear we care about you—I mean, we did watch that show together and we asked if you wanted to join us next time. If you were really feeling hurt, I do wish you brought it up sooner.”

You sigh, looking down at your twisting hands, bringing one of them up to your mouth to chew lightly on the nail. “Like I said way back, I was insecure about the two of you changing your relationship dynamic just because I wanted it. Maybe it was stupid, I don’t know, but the hurt I felt wasn’t stupid. Sure, we watched the show, and sure, you asked me if I wanted to join next time. But that was it! I was an afterthought. You dismissed me when I said I wanted to join, and yet you asked me why I didn’t bring it up before?”

Before you can sink your teeth any further into your nail, Wooyoung leans forward, gently pulling your hand away from your mouth and bringing it to his lap. “Don’t bite your nails, YN. I’m sure San didn’t mean to be dismissive,” he pleads, elbowing San lightly in the ribs, who winces and nods sincerely. “I’m sure you understand, we were just hurt you didn’t trust us enough, although your reasons are understandable. We want to make things right, though, and we want you to be comfortable to talk to us about your insecurities and worries.”

“Yeah, I didn’t mean to be so defensive,” San concedes. “I got too caught up in wanting everyone to get along, I got ahead of myself. I pride myself on being the calm one, but I was too passive and that quickly turned into self-righteousness.” His hand moves to rest atop yours and Wooyoung’s, his thumb gently rubbing circles into the soft skin.

“We still want you with us, YN,” Wooyoung cuts in, “and we want to change for you. We talked about this when you were gone, and we’ll respect your decision to leave if you so wish, but we really would like to try and work this through.”

You pause for a moment. You could walk away right now, minimizing any potential hurt that could follow. But as your eyes land on your conjoined hands, any minute wish to leave is immediately squashed and you smile up at the two of them. “I want to stay too.”

San matches your smile and Wooyoung’s grip on your hand tightens almost imperceptibly. Before anything else happens, he pulls you forward, wrapping his other arm around your shoulders as he engulfs you in a warm hug. Without hesitation, San quickly joins, pressing a kiss to the top of both your and Wooyoung’s head.

As they murmur promises of how they can include you more, as well as soft ‘I love you’s  in your ear, you can’t help but relax at their showcase of love. Things will turn out all right.

[faeprincess777]

Authors note: This is my first time writing anything, so please be nice! ❣️

Summary: The boys find out you have been talking poorly about yourself.

Ot8x reader 🫠

TW: sexual content (MDNI), afab reader, established relationship, insecurities, use of the color system, choking, use of pet names (babygirl, princess, baby, bunny, kitten, angel, sunshine, good girl, I think that's it), daddy kink, fingering, oral (f receiving), squirting, reader gets thighs slapped.

Let me know if I missed anything!

It had been a normal day. Hanging out with the boys in the living room, just chatting and joking. Chan had been fairly quiet all evening. He was reminiscing about a conversation he had with his sister, Hannah. You had spent the evening shopping and going to lunch with Hannah as she was visiting from Australia.

According to Hannah, you had been back to your self-deprecating jokes. It concerned her how you viewed yourself and she relayed those concerns to her brother. Chan had become quite annoyed. This was an ongoing battle between you and the boys. They thought they had made it clear how much they loved you and how beautiful they found you. It's no secret to the boys that you have self esteem issues. You all had discussed on multiple occasions that if you were having self doubt that you would be honest and open with them. But you hadn’t.

“Baby? Can you come here?” Chan calls you. You walk over, settling between his spread legs as he places his hands on your hips. He looks up at you. "You know we love you right?"

"Yes?" You say laughing.

“And you know we think you're beautiful?" Chan asks.

Your smile softens and you nod your head. Chan smiles, "I don't know if I believe that." There's a short pause before he continues.

"A little bird told me you've been talking poorly about yourself. I thought we talked about this, did we not?"

"Yes." You answer, shyly. By now the other boys are heavily invested in your conversation, growing just as frustrated as Chan.

"We had an agreement babygirl. What did I say would happen if I found you talking about yourself like that?" Chan asks, his voice carrying a darker tone. You gulp nervously. "I would be punished," you whisper.

Chan sighs sadly. "Turn around," he orders. You do as you're told, turning to face the row of mirrors across from the couch.

"Take a seat baby." Chan says, wanting you to sit in his lap. Again you don't protest. Chans slowing snakes one hand around your throat, just holding you in place and forcing you to look at your reflection. His other hand takes up residence on your waist.

"Here's what we're going to do," Chan whispers in your ear, tilting your head to face the mirrors. "You're not going to look away from yourself. You're going to tell us each thing that makes you insecure and we're going to show you how you're wrong, do you understand?" Chan asks.

You know there is no point in fighting them, so you shyly nod your head. "I need words, babygirl. What's your color?" Chan asks you, staring sternly at your reflection. Somehow, you muster the ability to speak again. "Yes, I'm green."

Chan smiles fondly and gently kisses the side of your head. "Good girl. Go ahead baby." You take a moment to gather your thoughts, you knew better than to lie as that would just make things worse. You try to gather the courage to tell them the truth.

“My eyes, they’re too big for my face. It makes me look weird," you say shyly. Felix is quick to object from his place on your left. “No, baby. I love your eyes. The way they shine when you laugh brings me so much joy. It's my favorite.” He leaves a gentle kiss on your cheek.

You take a moment to process what Felix had said, turning to look him in the eye. The raw emotion in his statement flusters you for a moment. His eyes hold so much love when he looks at you.

“Good job, baby. Keep going.” Chan says, turning your head back towards the mirror.

You sigh, taking a minute to compose yourself before continuing. “My stomach. It’s just not very… attractive.” Jisung gasped loudly from his place on the floor in front of you. “Who told you that?!? I love your cute little belly! I love to lay my head on it when we cuddle.” He says, crawling and kneeling at your feet. “It's perfect.” Jisung continues as he leans up to lead a series of kisses down your chest and abdomen.

It feels so good. You close your eyes and lean your head back on Chan’s shoulder, whimpering.

There's a sharp slap on your thigh. You quickly open your eyes, focusing back on your reflection. Chan is staring back at you intensely as he soothes the sting. “Eyes on me, princess.” Nodding, you continue.

“M-my thighs. I think they’re too big.” You say quickly, taking your lip between your teeth. It was Seungmin’s turn to pipe in. “Your thigh are fucking heaven.” He says, gliding his hand across your right thigh. “The way they hold my marks so well…” Suddenly, Seungmin lands a harsh slap on your thigh, appreciating how the skin turns such a pretty shade of red. “Fucking perfect.” He reiterates.

You’re a whimpering mess, and they know it. They love it. The effect they have on you is obvious, as is your effect on them. Jeongin is desperate to get his hands on you. To show you just how perfect you really are. He joins Jisung on the floor in front of you, gently tracing your calf.

“Anything else, babygirl?” Chan whispers in your ear. You take a deep breath, unaware of the storm you were about to start.

“I don’t really believe that I please you well enough.”

The room goes quiet. Chan takes a deep breath before snaking his hand around your throat. You’re breath hitches. “Y/N. That is the craziest and most disrespectful thing you’ve said.” Chan says through gritted teeth. “Do you really think we would lie to you?” Chan continued, very clearly agitated. You quickly shake your head only for Chan to tighten his grip.

“I want words princess.” He whispers harshly.

“No!” You quickly answer. Chan just lets out another long sigh.

“Let me show you, baby” Chan says as his hand snakes down under your skirt, pushing your now very damp panties to the side to play your clit. You whimper and writhe, “Shh, let daddy play.” Chan says seductively. You attempt to cover yourself, but they simply couldn’t allow that.

“Let's take this off sunshine.” Felix says as he assists in removing your shirt. Seungmin sounds from your right with a satisfied hum. “Mmmm, no bra? It's like you were waiting for this.”

It isn’t long before Felix is holding your left thigh open with one hand while the other hand pins yours to the couch, Seungmin, mirroring the same position on your right. Both leaned over, taking a nipple their mouths.

You let out an embarrassing loud moan, bucking your hips to gain more friction. Before long, Jisung and Jeongin are taking over for Chan, sliding your skirt and panties down your legs in one fluid motion, working you towards your high. Jisung is quick to bury his face in your sopping heat, moaning out at your taste. He is sure to leave room for Jeongin to work. Jeongin watches your face as he slides two long fingers inside you. “So tight, baby.” Jeongin says, taking his lip between his teeth.

It isn’t long before they work up to a punishing rhythm. They assist by spreading you wider with their hands on your calves, massaging occasionally. Jisung's spare hand snakes down to pump his now erect cock as he whines into your pussy.

Chan's free hand moves to slightly grope the breast Seungmin is working on. The hand on your throat slightly tightens again. Minho approaches from your left. One hand massages the breast Felix is working on. He rests his other hand on Felix's head, petting softly, making Felix let you a deep moan.

Changbin takes a seat next to Seungmin and assists in massaging your right calf as Jisung gets lost in pleasure. He takes turns with Chan and Minho, whispering soft praises; calling you a good girl, telling you how well you're doing for them, how pretty and perfect you are.

All insecurities are forgotten. The only thing going you are able to focus on is the mind-numbing, euphoric pleasure coursing through your body. You can feel your high quickly approaching. You're so close to reaching that peak.

Hyunjin approaches from your right, taking his place behind you. One hand resting in his pocket, and the other grabs your chin, tilting your head back. Looking deeply into your eyes. "Hello there, angel." Hyunjin says, leaning closer. You let out a soft moan. Hyunjin chuckles, "Do you want something? Or are you too fucked out to use your words like daddy told you to?"

You look pleading into his eyes. "K-Kisses p-please", you manage to get out. He lets out a chuckle. He loved hearing you beg, but he wanted to reward you. Hyunjin wastes no time giving you exactly what you wanted. His lips smash on to yours. You immediately part your lips for him and he takes full advantage as he snakes his tongue into your mouth, making you moan lewdly. You break free from Hyunjin’s kiss as you start whimpering.

“P-p-please! Please can I cum?” You beg. Hearing a dark chuckle, you know it's Chan.

“Have you learned your lesson baby? Do you realize how perfect you are for us? How much we love and adore you?” Chan asks, sucking at the sweet spot behind your ear.

“Yes! Yes, please. Please.” You moan out, barely holding your orgasm back.

“Go ahead, baby. Cum for us.” Chan grunts out.

That was all the permission you needed. Seconds later you cum hard with a scream Your juices squirt out of you, soaking the boys at your feet (though they don’t mind one bit). Jeongin and Jisung kept going, working you through your high.

“Fuck bunny, you’re so good to us.” Changbin says. Hyunjin sounds from behind you, “So perfect.” There is a short pause and only your panting can be heard.

Minho leans in near your ear, “but we aren’t done with you yet, kitten.”

[wileys-russo]

small intimate interactions II l.williamson x reader

this one might just be up there with some of my fave fics i've written so far small intimate interactions II l.williamson x reader

"can i help you with anything cheffy?" you turned to the voice of your best friend, meeting her beaming smile with one of amusement. "i don't know, can you?" you teased the older girl at her lack of culinary skills making her scoff and hold a hand to her chest in offence.

"i come in here offering myself and my services to you and you mock me, you know now i think you can do it all alone!" leah scoffed, crossing her arms over her chest and looking dramatically off into the distance, though she still made no move to leave the kitchen.

"and yet, here you still are." you grinned tossing a tea towel at the blonde which landed on her head. "ow! leah." you squealed as she flicked you with it, sending a sharp crack around the room and a mischievous smile in your direction.

"take the tray of chicken out of the oven please, if you can manage that." you teased her, turning back to what you had going on the stove. "yes chef!" leah saluted with a serious nod, grabbing the oven mits from beside you and doing as you'd asked, careful not to burn herself or drop what you'd spent the last couple of hours preparing.

"need a hand?" steph appeared next closely followed by jen, both girls looking at you with raised eyebrows as you flittered around the kitchen.

"if you could start taking everything out to the table and get the girls to take a seat would be great, thank you!" you smiled appreciatively, starting to dish everything else up and chuckling as you heard a strong scottish accent scream that dinner was ready from the table.

"i could have done that jen!" you laughed as the woman only grinned with a shrug, helping steph to carry everything out. "it all looks delicious, as always you've gone above and beyond. our little hostess with the mostess!" leah kissed at your cheek fondly causing them to heat up as you turned away from her, attempting to hide your blush.

the english skipper been your best friend for a few years now, having gravitated toward you from the very moment you moved from australia and signed with her beloved arsenal.

seeing your obvious nerves at joining the team and the lingering homesickness of moving so far away from everything you'd ever known she'd offered to help you get settled and given you your very first tour of london.

and once you got to know one another properly you followed each other like a shadow, one very rarely ever seen without the other much to the teasings of all of your friends about codependency issues.

the two of you had always had quite an affectionate friendship but it wasn't anything that raised any sort of red flag for you, after all you'd always been a touchy person with your close friends back home.

so you never thought anything of it when leahs hand would intertwine with yours as you'd walk somewhere together, or gently brush your thigh as you sat beside one another in the locker room, or even how closely the two of you would sit pressed together and practically on top of one another on the bus to games, avidly chattering away.

it didn't seem out of sorts when you'd cuddle up together when watching a movie or would have regular sleepovers and share the bed at one anothers homes, or when her long arms would wrap around your waist from behind and she'd cling to you tiredly after a particularly brutal training session.

the two of you would regularly mess around with one another, play fighting and pushing, poking and wrestling like hyperactive school children.

you'd often spend your sleepovers not even sleeping, instead laying down backwards on the bed, legs draped against the headboard and heads hanging off the edge of the mattress as you spoke about anything and everything, suffocated by your laughter at how utterly absurd your topics of conversation would become as time gradually ticked into the early hours of the morning.

it wasn't out of sorts for her warm lips to press fondly against your cheek or forehead, or for her slender fingers to tuck a loose strand of hair behind your ear as you rambled on about something. in fact the english girl could read you like a book, always knowing exactly what you needed sometimes before you even knew yourself.

none of that felt weird for you, or at least it didn't until you'd gone out for a nice meal with a small handful of the girls after training one evening, though you were minus leah who was unwell and had headed right home to sleep.

it was then that steph had casually asked when you and the english skipper had started dating, sending you into a flustered spiral. you'd of course denied it right away and asked why the older girl had even thought that, your national teammate rapidly back peddling at her mistake and apologizing profusely at her assumption.

caitlin however had taken a much less apologetic approach, stating that it was obvious to absolutely everyone but you and leah that the two of you were clearly and hopelessly in love with one another.

katie and beth backing her up right away it sent your cheeks bright red and you'd left the restaurant early, needing some fresh air and to go home and sort out the immense wave of emotions which washed over you at the thought of loving your best friend as anything more than just that.

that was around a month ago and you'd tried your very best to push it to the back of your mind and carry on as you always had with the blonde.

though now things that once seemed like a comfortable second nature for you raised alarms that hadn't been there previously, leahs slender fingers tracing shapes on your bare legs as you watched a movie and they sat stretched across her lap. or her arm draped across the back of your shoulders as you curled into her side on the lounge, even just the lingering hugs you two shared at every greeting or goodbye that maybe lasted a minute or two too long to just be friendly.

each and every small intimate interaction left you reeling and your mind a disgustingly complicated mess of overthinking. you had no idea what you were going to do about it, especially given that you couldn't even work out within yourself how you felt about the blonde.

you'd always loved her, but the thought of being in love with her was a foreign and terrifying one, and something you avoided dwelling on at any and all costs.

it seemed easier that way, to just be in sheer denial of anything at all changing or shifting, to just carry on as you always had which was of course an impossible task.

it left you clouded with doubt and plagued with the ever prominent and growing fear that acknowledging any of this could mean losing leah all together, in every capacity.

"oh there's another tray in here, do you want me to take it out?" the taller girl realized as she went to close and turn off the oven. "oh those are yours! i almost forget, yeah if you could please." you nodded, flicking off the stove and quickly running the now empty pots under some cold water, leaving them by the sink to be dealt with later.

with eight hungry footballers in your home that you were about to feed and entertain you were sure you could whip them into an assembly line to help you clean up later.

a lot of you not having had the chance to spend any sort of quality time together since the season had commenced you'd invited a few of the girls around for a dinner party. you'd always adored hosting and cooking for those you treasured, it was one of the main ways you showcased your love, and your team mates were always the most grateful of guests.

after all as they often said the way to someones heart, was through their stomach.

"you made me smileys?" leah grinned in disbelief as she grabbed out the tray and her crystal blue eyes lit up at the sight of the much cultivated childhood food.

"yeah, i know you don't like most of this so i wanted to make sure you'd actually get something to eat." you glanced over your shoulder with a sincere smile, not an ounce of teasing in your tone as leahs cheeks now flushed bright red at the sweet gesture.

"i'd have eaten. i always love your cooking!" she defended, quickly turning around to move them onto a plate to hide her flushed cheeks.

"that's because i only cook things that i know you eat whenever you come over lee, your palette is like my four year old niece. though even she can handle some mayo." you teased, bumping your shoulder into leahs as you appeared beside her, moving the chicken onto a serving platter with some tongs.

"oh i miss her! can we facetime her again soon?" the blonde asked hopefully and you nodded, the young girl just as much a fan of leah as leah was of her, even though she'd only briefly met her when she was in australia for the world cup it seemed to be an instant connection.

"my mum keeps asking when you're going to actually come to australia for a proper visit and not just for something football related." you chuckled with a small shake of your head, the woman forever on your case about not having met half of the people you held dear in your second home, much as you tried to remind most of them had their own lives and families scattered across the world to spend their minimal time off with.

"i'm just waiting on an invitation." the older girl smiled teasingly as you smacked her on the shoulder. "please like you don't know you'd always be welcome, i'd love to show you round properly. sometimes i swear you know me better than i know myself, plus my family already adores you and they've only technically actually met you like twice that wasn't over the phone!" the words slipped casually off your tongue and in the moment you thought nothing of it, but the thought of your family accepting her and you showing her around what she knew was your favorite place in the whole world had sent leah spiraling.

"i do apologise for the lack of ham sandwiches tonight though, tesco was all out." you grinned, nodding for her to join you as you grabbed the last of the food and headed for the table where the rest of the girls were sat and ready, leah shaking it off as she followed you out.

"you guys seriously couldn't wait?" you laughed at how most of them had already dished themselves up a plate, placing down the chicken in the middle of the table as forks clashed to grab at it. "some of us did!" steph rolled her eyes gesturing to herself and viv who indeed had empty plates.

"your loss, it is delicious!" laura grinned among a mouthful of pasta, viv sternly telling her not to talk with food in her mouth before she and steph dished up for themselves and you took your seat in between leah and beth.

"oi why's leah get her own special food!" katie realised the small mountain of smileys on leahs plate in leus of any of the other sides with a scowl.

"cause she doesn't eat most of this." you answered for her with a shrug, smiling gratefully at jen who handed you back your plate piled high with food from the other end of the table. "so she gets special treatment cause she eats like a weeun?" katie rolled her eyes and tried to snatch one, your hand reaching out to swat the irishwoman away on leahs behalf.

"smileys! i've not had those in years." beth gasped as the table errupted over leahs seemingly controversial meal, the blonde covering her food protectively as multiple hands tried to snatch at it.

"did i not cook enough food for the rest of you that you all feel the need to complain about one tiny thing?" you called out loudly over the top of them with a raised eyebrow, the complaining ceasing and immediately replaced with a shower of compliments sent your way.

"much better." you grinned, shoveling a forkful of pasta into your mouth as everyone settled, normal chatter resuming as you all enjoyed one another's company.

"thank you, you're the best." leah murmured quietly, her hand landing on your thigh and squeezing gently, pressing a grateful kiss to your cheek before turning back to her conversation with laura.

the blush coating your cheeks didn't go unnoticed by your australian teammates, both sending you a knowingly smug smile as you glared back at them from across the table, kicking caitlin harshly in the shin as she began to make kissy faces at you.

"ow, fuck you!" the older girl hissed quietly, trying to kick back at you as you tucked your legs under your chair, her feet instead finding poor beths ankle who cursed her out for it.

the rest of dinner passed through rather uneventfully, and sure enough it didn't take much convincing to have them all band together to help you clean up afterwards, the group of you now gathered in your living room piled on top of one another.

"-please don't be in love with someone else! please don't have somebody waiting on you!" you and beth belted out, twirling one another around as you sang the rest of the chorus.

all of you far too wound up after dinner for a movie you'd opted to bust out the karaoke machine some the girls had bought you for your birthday earlier this year instead.

"I was enchanted to meet youu!' you sang loudly, handing the mic to steph and collapsing basically on top of leah as beth finished off the final two lines, the blonde serenading a very rosy and loved up looking viv.

"what a natural, you're really wasting your life away as a footballer my girl." leah teasingly fanned you as you posed, head dropping onto her shoulder. "god its exhausting being hot, funny and talented." you sighed dramatically as steph and katie were next up and started to sing cruel summer.

"at least we can tick humble off the list then." leah grinned down at you as you smacked her chest halfheartedly. "hey can i stay tonight? i don't think i can be bothered driving home and i've hardly seen you this week with my rehab amping up." leah asked quietly and you nodded without a moments hesitation, moving around so your head was in her lap and your legs draped over laura who sat wedged on the other side of you avidly chattering away to jen.

"you missss me!" you sung out with a grin, wiggling happily as the blonde rolled her eyes and forced a sigh. "i mostly miss your king size bed and massive tv, don't flatter yourself." the older girl pinched at your cheeks as you pulled faces up at her.

"you missed me too though, just a little." you held up your thumb and pointer finger leaving a decent gap in between. "more like-" leah pushed them closer together so there was hardly a gap as you gasped and leah tangled a hand in your hair with a soft smile.

"you wound me lee, and after i made you smileys and invited you oh so graciously into my home!" "i have a key so really i'd just let myself in if there was no invitation, plus you always eat all the snacks at my house so consider us even." "i do not! i'd like to contest that accusation." "i, the honourable judge williamson, hear your case and find you....guilty." "wow i don't even get a lawyer?" "you don't even get a phone call kid, lock her up boys!" "i would like to once again point out that i am only exactly eleven months younger than you leah catherine." "the key word here being....younger." "you're truly insufferable sometimes you know that?" "oo that was a big word, where'd we learn that one from?" "your mum actually, when we were speaking about you." "i'd love to argue that but really i'm quite certain she likes you more than me sometimes." leah sighed with a shake of her head, covering your smug looking face with her hand and shaking your head to and fro for a second before you pushed her off with a grin and a teasing wiggle of your eyebrows. "oh speaking of she wants you to come round for dinner soon, something about missing you? i can't relate though, she's not yet been around you enough to know how positively irritating you really are." "fighting words for someone who just asked to sleepover because she missed me." "i don't remember the words 'i miss you' ever actually leaving my mouth?" "crazy, i just heard them?"

"excuse me lovebirds, we're gonna head off!" your cheeky smiles both dropped at beth's words and leah frowned as you picked your head up out of her lap and quickly shuffled away as if burnt by her touch.

most of the girls all agreeing to head off after checking the time you were yanked out of the small bubble you'd previously occupied with leah, standing up and walking most of them out, leah hugging her friends goodbye before sitting back down on the lounge.

"you not leavin?" katie frowned, lingering behind as leah looked up from her phone and shook her head. "nah gonna crash here, i'm tired." the blonde shrugged, eyebrows furrowing at the look on the irishwomans face at her word.

"what? i stay here all the time." "i know...exactly my point." "and what is your point?" leah asked the brunette with a sigh.

"why don't you just tell that poor girl you love her? the two of you do this little dance around your feelings every day and surely thats exhausting?" katie crossed her arms over her chest as leahs face flushed with embrassment.

"i don't feel that way about her. i wish you'd all drop this you're making it weird between us and its not appreciated, she's my best mate!" leah denied with a firm shake of her head, though she knew the words leaving her lips was a filthy lie, and katie did too.

"yeah leah, she's your best mate so just talk to her. whats the harm in that? i see the way you look at one another, i really don't think you'll be left disappointed." the older girl smiled sincerely, squeezing her shoulder supportively and striding out of the room.

which left leah to sink back into the sofa with a deep and troubled sigh, alone with her thoughts as she dragged her hands down her face and tossed her phone beside her, her head swimming.

unbeknownst to the defender you'd been cornered in the kitchen and given a similar talking to by your national team mates, both girls like older sisters they'd known you for years and made an avid point of stating they'd never seen you look at someone the way you looked at leah.

and similar to katie they pushed you to just talk to her about it, affirming they saw the way you both interacted and it was obvious to everyone that neither of you were being honest with one another, and over time things would eventually boil over if that continued to be the case.

though shortly after you'd waved everyone off and shut your front door for the final time, dead bolting it and flicking off the lights one by one as you made your way back to the living room.

not even needing to ask leah was already on her feet and following you to your bedroom as the rest of the house was engulfed into darkness. "oh hello gorgeous." leah breathed out as she belly flopped into your bed, sighing as the memory foam melded perfectly to her body.

rolling your eyes at her you disappeared into your wardrobe, grabbing out some of leahs clothes from your drawers, the two of you having spent so much time at one anothers homes you had clothes and belongings littered everywhere at each place.

"oi!" leah yelled out as the bundle of material hit her in the face where she lay down on your bed, peeling the hoodie off her face and sending you a look of disdain as you only grinned and dipped into the bathroom to change and wash your face, leaving her to do the same.

both of you now changed you settled into your bed where leah had already loaded the wizard of oz on the tv, the movie a favourite of both of yours making you clap happily as leah clicked play.

after around a half hour you found yourselves already tangled with one another, not an uncommon occurrence as you'd grown to be incredibly comfortable around one another over the years.

leahs head resting on your sternum the older girl was entranced by the consistent rising and falling of your chest beneath her, one hand tucked under her head as the other sat dormant on your hip, pointer finger lightly stroking the slit of tanned skin where your shirt had ridden up slightly.

your left arm had slipped up the back of her hoodie, nails scratching gently at the bare skin of her back, your right hand lay tangled in her hair which she'd pulled up into a messy bun, absentmindedly tracing circles on the back of her neck with your thumb.

as much as leah was relaxed and would normally be humming along to each song as she could hear you doing, internally she was a flustered mess, shocking herself with how still she kept her body despite how freaked out she was by her conversation with katie.

it lead her to overthink every little interaction she'd had with you, worrying if she'd ever made you uncomfortable with the small intimacies you shared almost daily.

which then just lead her to stumble blindly down the path of how she felt at all the silent ways you showed one another how much you cared.

like the way you'd lean in and fix her collar when it was crooked on nights out, or how she would always grab your boots for you when you inevitably left them behind after training or games.

how you'd hold your hair up and ask leah to put on your most prized necklace for you after you'd had to take it off for a game, or the way you'd mess about with her fingers and twist her rings sometimes when she knew you were overwhelmed.

or how leah knew you would always underestimate how suddenly british weather could change, never bringing a jacket when you needed to so she made sure to always drape hers over you instead.

or how occasionally you'd demand leah stay still as you ever so gently collected a stray eyelash off her cheek, holding it out on your pinky and ordering her to make a wish before you'd blow it away with a soft smile.

so caught up in her thoughts leah hadn't even realised the movie had finished, only yanked back down into reality as you nudged her and called out her name. "you okay?" you asked her with a concerned frown, noticing she was clearly out of it as leah wordlessly nodded.

pulling her head off your chest you quickly withdrew your hands from her body, shuffling backwards a little as the two of you settled in your new positions, laid on your sides and looking right at one another.

"have i got something on my face?" you teased quietly at her staring, leahs lips curling into a smile. "no its ugly as ever don't worry." the blonde quipped with a smirk, flicking at your ear as you gasped and kicked her.

which suddenly jolted the pair of you from your previously calm and settled state, leahs cold hands tickling at your sides as your laughter echoed around the room making her grin. yanking them away you pinched at her hips, the two of you smacking and slapping one another around giggling manically like naughty kids, hushing one another as if worried you might be caught out and told off at a moments notice.

"no!" you grunted out with a laugh as leah tried to sit on top of you, her slender fingers digging into your ribs mercilessly with an evil smile. wiggling your body furiously beneath her you shoved her off, quickly straddling her hips right as the blondes back hit the mattress.

attempting to pin her hands down was a pointless task as the stronger girl interlinked your fingers and pressed your hands together, trying to throw you off of her as her knee pushed into your side, causing you to collapse back into the bed with a loud pelt of laughter.

both of you now struggling to breathe among your giggles you called a truce, chests heaving and faces flushed bright red from the rumble, leahs head turning to admire your side profile momentarily.

feeling her gaze on your cheek your eyes flickered sideways, meeting her curious look as your laughter slowly ceased and you found yourself lost in one anothers wondering orbs.

for once her mind finally quiet leah ever so slowly began to lean in, her eyes flittering between you and your lips.

your heart hammering in your chest you made no move to stop her as the two of you edged closer and closer into one anothers personal space.

your lips now just milimetres from one another you turned your head ever so slighty, your nose brushing against leahs as the blondes tongue ran across her lips somewhat apprehensively, eyes seeking out any sort of green light from you before she made her next move.

before you could withdraw your mind from its scattered places leahs arms were around you, her hold familiar and comforting. though at the close proximity of your nervous bodies you felt again the rush of helplessness, the sinking yielding, the surging tide of worry that what happened next could make or break the two of you.

"can i kiss you?" "please."

consent gained leah closed the tiny gap between you, rosy pink lips soft and alluring as they pressed against your own. leahs head spun at the dizzying sensation of her mouth molding perfectly with yours, ravishing in the feeling of kissing you.

her hand moved to rest on your cheek, palm rough and callous but her touch tender as you lent into it, tilting your head slightly as leahs breath caught at the new angle.

her tongue traced along your bottom lip, dipping in the small cracks and grooves, your lips slightly chapped but still so plump and inviting as they moved in rhythm against her own.

her insistent mouth was parting your shaking lips, sending wild tremors along the tips of your nerves, evoking from you sensations you had never known to be capable of feeling from the simple action as her tongue swirled around your mouth sending you into a silent frenzy.

you'd kissed people before obviously, but never ever had one plunged you into such a swimming giddiness that spun your head round and round, almost drowned in the overwhelming pleasure of the small but intimate act with someone you trusted so dearly.

then suddenly, lungs screaming and vision foggy you both surfaced for air, lips parting from one another with a slight pop as your chests heaved and your eyes scanned one another features for the first sign of any kind of reaction.

"we should talk about that." you were the first to speak, voice cracking slightly as leahs eyes dropped back down to your lips which seemed to be calling to her like a siren from the very moment they departed her own.

"yeah...we should."

though it seemed that was all that needed to be said as now much more feverishly your lips smashed into one anothers, your hands tangling in leahs hair as hers traced down the curvature of your back, drawing your body closer into her own as your bare legs tangled, kicking down the sheets exposing your bodies more to the chill of the brisk autumn evening.

and it seemed that without really needing to talk about it, the two of you had finally unlocked what would become the much more apparent act of intimacy between the two of you.

that wasn't to say future conversations wouldn't happen, but right now as your bodies began to greet one another in an entirely new fashion you'd both got the confirmation you'd been struggling for oh so desperately that the internal battle wasn't one sided.

and one day you'd lay down together and laugh that all it took was some stupid smiley face potatoes.

[piftamere]

left unsaid - gojo satoru

synopsis : you tell him you love him for the first time and he freezes completely.

wc : 1k

tags : hurt/mild comfort, bittersweet ending, some miscommunication?

dividers by cafekitsune

a/n: i was in a weird mood and wrote this in class, so enjoy this little angsty fic :P idk if this has been done before but 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️, gojo is so First love/Late spring coded to me

Satoru was sitting on the pavement in front of your house.

How long had he been there, waiting for you to come back out ?

Going over everything you said, everything he didn’t, everything he wished he did.

Replaying the "what ifs" over and over, his head in his hands, fingers entangled in the white strands of his hair.

You told him you loved him for the first time and he froze completely.

You must hate him now, he’s sure of it, how could you not when you bared yourself in front of him and he froze. He hates himself too. Maybe it’s for the best, you walking away now, before he can hurt you any more, before you hurt him.

It’s raining hard, he notices, he’s not sure when it started though, it must have been a while ago, because he’s soaked to the bones. But it’s far down the list of his priorities at the moment.

Satoru doesn’t hear the door opening, or the footsteps getting closer, doesn’t hear you call out his name. Everything drowned by the sound of the rain, by his own thoughts. He flinches when you place your hand on his shoulder.

“Satoru? What are you still doing here? You’re drenched…”

He’s staring at the ground, barely acknowledging your presence.

“Come on, let’s go inside.” You reach for his hand to pull him inside, but he won’t budge. His skin is ice cold. He turns to look at you, eyes filled with tears, and your heart sinks into your chest. He opens his mouth to speak but the words refuse to come out. He looks down, defeated, as he gets up to follow you inside.

He makes a few steps before stopping, his hold on your hand tightening.

“I’m sorry,” he mutters, “I’m sorry I couldn’t say I l-” he chokes up, still unable say it.

You don’t turn around, not sure if you can stop yourself from crying if you look at him right now.

“I know, I’m sorry too.”

The sky is darkening, tiny droplets are starting to fall, you’re both laughing as you run hand in hand to your house. You spent the day together at an amusement park, stuffing your faces with sweets.

He stops a few feet from your door, circling his arms around your waist.

“Toru, what are you doing? We’re gonna be wet” you don’t try to get out of his grasp, instead walking closer to him as you chuckle, and he smiles fondly at you.

“It’s just a little water.”

“True...” you reply, wrapping your arms around his neck and tiptoeing to give him a peck on the lips.

He shakes his head no, grinning, “Not good enough, try again”

So you do, who are you to refuse your boyfriend a proper kiss?

As you pull away, you decide you’re ready to tell him what’s been on your mind for weeks. You take a deep breath.

“Toru?” he hums to let you know he’s listening, “I love you”

You wait for him to say something, anything, not necessarily to say it back, but at least to acknowledge it. Instead he freezes, like a deer caught in headlights.

Your arms drop by your side. “Toru?”

“I just...” he starts rambling, “I’m sorry, I don’t-”

You cut him off, you don’t mean too but you’re raising your voice now. “You don’t? Fine, forget I said anything Satoru.” You walk away, almost running, trying your best to hide the tears forming in your eyes, but the cracks in your voice betrayed you already. All he can do is watch you leave.

You’re both inside, in silence. You try not to think about what just happened, so you make him a cup of tea to warm him up, and give him a towel.

“I put sugar in it, just how you like it.” You're uncomfortable, not knowing how to act around him anymore.

The air is thick, you’re having trouble breathing so close to him.

“Listen I-”

“You don’t have to say anything Satoru, it’s ok-”

“Please let me speak”, he cuts you off as he looks up from his cup, his eyes are pleading, still red and puffy from crying. Caught off guard, you simply nod and sit down as far away from him as possible.

“Earlier when you told me… that, I wasn’t expecting it, it left me speechless. But I didn’t mean that I don’t care about you, because I do, you’re the most important person to me, I need you to know that.” His voice is hoarse, he looks so desperate, a tear rolling down his cheek. You want to wipe it, to comfort him more than anything, but you stop yourself.

“You can’t even say it out loud?” You can guess why it’s so hard for him, the last time he loved someone it ended terribly, still your heart aches, and you find yourself wishing he would just leave.

“I’m sorry, I wish I could... but the words get stuck.”

“Do you think you’ll ever be able to say it?” Your voice shakes.

“I don’t know. I think so?” He offers you a timid, hesitant smile.

He reaches out towards your hand, holding it like it’s made of porcelain, “I’m so scared of losing you.”

Satoru is your only weakness. You can’t stand seeing him so vulnerable. It’s impossible not to cave in.

So you do. You let him hold you, caging you in his arms, his face hidden in the crook of your neck.

He takes a deep breath in. “Did you just sniff me?” You chuckled.

You feel him smile against your skin, relieved to hear you stopped crying.

“Maybe.”

“Weirdo.” you whisper.

The topic is still hanging over your heads. You’ll most likely have this conversation again, soon, when you’re both strong enough to stomach it. But in this instant, you can feel each other’s heartbeats, your tears are drying and as the rain stops, everything is fine.

[hockeyluvrr]

Can I request Luke Hughes him telling his gf goodnight I love you and her replying with thank you?(like the TikTok trend going around)

of course! I think I got the right trend, sorry for it being a bit short! thanks so much for requesting, hope you like it! 🫶🏻

MASTERLIST

Unexpected Responses || lh43

word count: 544

gif not mine!

It was already quite late as Luke walked you to your car, his hands buried in his sweatpants pockets to combat the cold air outside his apartment. The both of you had just spent the evening together, watching movies and eating takeout while cuddling on the couch.

When you both reached your car, you turned to face him and leaned against the driver’s door, looking at Luke with a warm smile. Luke mirrored your smile as he stepped forward and wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you close as a familiar warm feeling spread through his chest. Even though you both had been together for a while, he still always got that warm feeling every time he looked at you.

“I’m really glad you came over tonight,” Luke spoke softly, his hands massaging your hips gently.

“Me too. I had fun,” you reply, your smile widening slightly.

You both had a moment where you just looked at each other, enjoying the calmness and closeness. Luke, with soft eyes, reached his hand up to tuck a bit of hair behind your ear, “You drive safe, yeah?”

You nod in response, “Yeah, I will.”

“Goodnight, baby…I love you,” Luke spoke softly, with such ease.

You smile before replying, a little bit playful, “Thank you.”

Luke slowly blinked, trying to process your words. His brows are scrunched in confusion as he opens his mouth to say something. His mouth closes a second later, lost for words. “Wait…what?” He finally spits out, his voice cracking as he speaks.

“Thank you,” you repeat with a joking glint in your eye, making Luke’s brain short circuit at your words.

“No, no, no,” he shakes his head, a confused smile on his face. “That’s not how that works, baby. I tell you ‘I love you’ and then you say it back. Then we both feel all warm and fuzzy inside. That’s what’s supposed to happen, you’re supposed to say it back.”

“Oh, I am?” You tease lightly. “Where’s that written rule?”

“Right here!” Luke says, tapping over his heart. “It’s a rule, you can’t just say ‘thank you’ after I tell you ‘I love you’.”

You laugh softly before leaning in to kiss his cheek, “I know, I know,” you murmur softly. “I’m just messing with you, baby. I love you too.”

“Oh, thank god. You almost gave me a heart attack,” he says dramatically, pressing a hand to his chest.

“Drama queen,” you mutter fondly with an eye roll.

“Your drama queen,” he shoots back before giving you one last sweet kiss.

“Yeah, yeah,” you mutter after you both pull away.

“Now, seriously, drive safe, okay? Call me when you get home.”

“I will,” you nod before opening your car door, “Goodnight, Luke. I love you.”

“Goodnight, baby,” he grins, “I love you too.”

With that, you get in your car and drive away. Luke stands there for a few moments, smiling as he watches your car drive down the street. As Luke turned to walk back into his apartment, he thought about how you’d probably tease him about this for the next week, but he didn’t mind. Because to Luke, it was moments like these that made him fall more and more in love with you.

[ddejavvu]

please send me requests for the outsiders!

pairing: the outsiders x fem!reader, darrel curtis x fem!reader (ambiguous), sodapop curtis x fem!reader (ambiguous)

summary: you offer darry some help around the house

a/n: i just want to help him, those bum ass boys never did shit around the house i KNOW IT. i'll help you with dusting darry baby </333

You're trying to tamp down the silly pride in your chest that you've been invited to one of Sodapop's 'Bum Around at Home' days. You're casual friends with a few of the guys from their circle of friends, but Sodapop was one you hadn't thought you were too close with; not until he'd offered to bring you along to hang out at his house with the group. Plenty of his and Steve's stories have started out with, 'while we were bummin' 'round the house' and now you're eager to be included in the larger group dynamic.

You know the outside of the house from the times you'd walked Ponyboy home from school, a few years older than him but still friendly through outside studies. You'd also stopped by once to drop something off for Johnny, but that's only because his own house was not a fit place for guests. You've never actually been inside until now, and the soft, warm lighting makes up for what Sodapop had affectionately referred to as their 'lack of housekeeping'. He's not wrong, there's chores undone, dishes in the sink and laundry draped over the table, but it's homey, somewhere you can tell people live in. It's nice.

"Take a seat on the couch there," Soda gestures to it when he opens the door, "Two-Bit, move your ass, Y/N needs to sit."

"Woah, a lady guest today. Should've worn my fancy sneakers, "Two-Bit snickers, "Only got three holes in 'em instead of four. How's it goin', Y/N?"

You know Keith from school, he'd spent an equal amount of time doing his classwork as he did tugging on your hair from where it drapes over the back of your seat. But still you remember laughing with him at his immature humor, and you settle down beside him with a smile.

"Not bad. Are those all yours?"

An impressive smattering of empty beer bottles sits beside the couch by Two-Bit's feet, and he kicks one over with a shoe that does, in fact, have four holes in it.

"Some are from last night."

"He's been here for two days," Soda scoffs, taking the seat on your other side, "Surprised he hasn't started collecting dust yet."

"Hey, I move!" Two-Bit insists, "Gotta take a piss after all the beers I've been drinking."

Ponyboy looks displeased that he'd chosen that moment to walk out of the kitchen, a glass of water in hand. His nose wrinkles and you can't help but laugh, waving politely at him where he stands in the doorway.

"Hey Pony," You call, "How's school?"

"It's alright." The younger boy shrugs, settling tentatively across from the couch, leaning against the side of the television, "Walking home isn't as much fun without you, though."

You smile fondly at the kid, glad that you no longer had to deal with the perils of high school but missing his company all the same.

"I'm sure you get along okay with Johnny. Where is he, by the way? 'Thought you said everyone'd be here."

"He and Dallas went to get more cigarettes, I think." Pony hums, leaning his head against the TV, "Only one missing is Steve. I don't know where he is."

"He's working today." Soda sighs longingly, "Wish he'd gotten off, but there ain't enough of us to cover. We're almost the only employees."

"And your other brother," You hum softly, "Uh- Darrel?"

"He's heading to work soon." Soda props a leg up on the sofa, shoe still on and surely dirtying the fabric, "He works every day. He's just getting ready now, you can say hi before he leaves if you want."

You hum noncommittally, turning your attention to the grainy cartoon Two-Bit is enraptured in. It's white noise, but you itch to do something- perhaps you're not made for bumming around.

The screen door rattles with the entrance of Johnny and Dallas, and you share a less-familiar nod and smile with the latter than you do with Johnny. He's never bothered you- never crossed your path, really, but you've heard rumors and you're not keen to be messed with now. It seems your plan works: He stays a respectable distance from you, equally uncaring.

"Didn't know you were comin'." Johnny smiles, settling at your feet with his back to the couch, "Would've offered to grab you something from the store if we knew."

"I'm okay for now." You assure him, nudging his side with your calf where he sits beside your legs, "Thanks, Johnny. You doing okay?"

"Not bad." He shrugs, "Not worse than usual."

You nod, silent and understanding.

"Alright boys," Darrel makes his appearance from one of the back rooms, but when his eyes catch yours, he starts slightly, "Oh- uh. Sorry. Don't think we've met."

"I'm Y/N," You supply, reaching for the hand that he extends to shake, "I went to school with everyone for a bit, but I graduated last year."

Darry nods but Soda cuts in, "Yeah, and her car's a hunk of junk. She's been into the DX for repairs so much lately I know her serial number by heart."

"Hey! It's not junk," You elbow him, but a good-natured smile spreads over your face despite your offense; he's right - "It's got personality."

"The kind'a personality that won't let you brake while the windows are down."

You take the resulting unanimous snort from the men around you with grace, because admittedly, your car is ridiculous. But it's all you can afford, so you'll take their teasing in stride.

"Well it's nice to meet you." Darry sends you a smile, but it fades quicker than you'd have liked, "Maybe you can make sure none of these knuckleheads smoke more than a pack today. And maybe wash the dishes for once." Darry swats Ponyboy on the back of the head, and the boy's face twists into a scowl.

"We'll take care of it, Darry." Soda assures him, but stays firmly seated on the couch, and Darrel seems to know that it's a white lie by the way his face hardens again, exhaustion creased into his far-too-young face.

"Right. Well I'll be back after dark. And I'll take care of the laundry. And the vacuuming, just please- please, do the dishes, boys. That's all I ask."

Even Two-Bit hums noncommittally at the order, and you marvel at how Darry has 3 extra people in the house and somehow no hands for chores.

"I'll wrangle them," You tease, even if you don't plan on barking orders at anyone, if only to see Darry's brow smooth for just a second.

He chuckles at your tough persona, fitting a blue button-up over his white undershirt, "I appreciate it. Aside from the dishes all I want is for y'all not to burn the house down."

"No guarantees." Dallas sneers, a cigarette fittingly in his hand, "Pony smokes like a fuckin' factory. You'll be lucky if one'a his doesn't go up in flames."

You're sure if Darrel could get away with smacking Dallas upside the head, too, he would.

"Be careful." Darry warns, and you watch as he grabs a wallet off of the table, tucking it into his pocket, "I'll be back late. Don't wait up. Do the dishes."

"Bye, Dar." Soda calls, leaning his head sideways onto your shoulder as he props his feet up on the edge of the coffee table, "Don't pull a muscle."

Darry's only answer is the slamming of the door, and no one gets up to do the dishes.

You glance at the clock and see that Darry won't be home for several hours- probably more than ten. That's ample time, sure, but your hands itch to scrub food stains from the way Darry had emphasized the necessity of the chore. You know about the Curtis' situation; Darry had to take on the mangled role of brother and father, but you're realizing now that you hadn't understood how much of a workload he'd taken on.

You settle into your spot on the couch, fiddling with the loose strings on your jeans, trying to assure yourself that the dishes will be done.

--

"Turn it up, Two, if you're gonna talk through the whole damn thing," Steve chucks a bottle cap at Two-Bit where he's snickering in Johnny's ear. Steve had turned up not even an hour ago, and he's already spread out over the armchair in the corner, straight off of a shift at work so slow that he'd been sent home early. He'd shoved the clean laundry off of the chair to sit down, and it had only made it into a basket because the basket was sitting beside the chair.

No one has done the dishes.

Your legs are beginning to ache from not moving and in a sudden fit of energy you nudge Soda's arm away from where he'd been resting it comfortably against your thigh, chaste but comfortable. He's touchy, and it's typically nice, but you feel itchy sitting in someone else's home and not helping out with things that clearly need to be helped with.

"I'm gonna go wash those dishes." You announce, and Two-Bit snickers at your statement.

"Don't worry about that, Y/N."

"Yeah, sit down. I'll do 'em later." Soda waves a nonchalant hand towards the kitchen, "Darry don't get home until way after midnight, we have time."

"They don't have to sit there, though. I could just do them now." You bargain, "And then no one has to worry about them."

"You're a guest! Just sit and watch TV," Soda insists, "Really, Darry just loves talkin' about chores. It'll get done, don't sweat it."

You're sweating it.

You trust that Soda will do them, you know he doesn't mean to inconvenience his brother, you just wish they'd put 'bumming around' after helping out.

"Fine. But I'm tired of sitting. I'm gonna take a walk."

"Careful. Stay in the neighborhood, and if you see a car that's too nice to be one of us, beeline back for the house." Steve narrows his eyes at you, "Want someone to walk with you?"

"I'm fine." You insist, "I'll be careful. I'll be back soon."

No one notices when you snag the laundry basket from beside the chair; they're all too busy watching TV.

There's a worn-out picnic table in the tiny backyard that the Curtis' house offers, and it's the perfect place to set the basket. There's a decent amount of laundry inside- which you're sure Darry washed himself, and you mull over the constant tiredness in his eyes while you smooth and fold their laundry.

You can't imagine what he's going through- you can't imagine what any of them are going through. You're sure everyone is struggling in their own ways, but you wonder if the boys help him more than they've let on so far. You can't assume anything- you've only spent a few hours in their house, but Darry seems to be desperate for extra help. And you can't imagine working an entire day away only to return to a house full of undone laundry, so your fingers carefully tuck each undershirt into a neat square, and you brush away lint from the blue jeans that fill the basket.

It's a nice day outside, a little breezy, which makes it easy to get through the basket of laundry. You replace it with a freshly folded stack, and you're glad for the back entrance to the Curtis' house that lets you pass two bedrooms, one of which is clearly Sodapop's and Ponyboy's from the posters on the wall.

You duck into the other one and it seems about right for Darrel. It's sparse on decor, but it's got a secondary pair of work boots by the closet and it's the neatest of the bedrooms. The bed is made and you set the laundry basket on the comforter, venturing into Soda and Pony's room only to grab a pen and paper.

No one thinks anything of it when you slip back into the house, retaking your seat on the couch that, miraculously, no one has lounged into yet.

"Short walk." Dallas notes, scrutinizing you from his spot in the corner.

You shrug, "It was hot outside. Just needed to stretch my legs."

You slip back into the mind-numbing routine of watching cartoons and snacking on whatever someone offers you, and you let yourself enjoy hours slipping away like minutes as you finally relax.

Sodapop does do the dishes, far too late for your liking but still respectably before his brother returns. Darry is grateful for the empty sink when he gets home to the quiet house, and he beelines for his bedroom to shuck his work shirt before starting on the laundry he's sure got shoved unceremoniously somewhere.

It's late, and his tired muscles ache for respite especially considering he has to do it all over again tomorrow. But these things must be done, and he steels himself against the mundane chores he has to do to keep the house running. Somehow, keeping up the house is harder than his blue collar labor.

He's impressed that the laundry basket made it carefully onto his bed, but he's even more surprised when he peers inside and finds it full of folded clothes. There's a note on the top, and Darry squints in the low light of his bedroom at the unfamiliar handwriting.

Darry,

I hope you don't feel like I've invaded your privacy. That's the last thing I want. I just thought that you seemed a little overwhelmed this morning, and I'd hate for you to have to deal with something silly like laundry after a long day at work. If I've crossed a line, let me know and it won't happen again. I just hope I could help out a little. Anytime you need an extra hand, I can pitch in.

P.S - I made Soda do the dishes.

Y/N

Darry realizes he's been chewing on his tongue only after he's finished reading your name off of the page, and he lets up where his incisors had been gnawing into muscle.

It's- heartfelt. Casually so, but it's still hit the mark. 'Overwhelmed' doesn't begin to cover the way he feels, and even if his brothers do notice it, they've never outright said it. He glances down once more at the impeccably folded laundry and feels something in his chest simultaneously loosen and tighten, something relaxed and something tensed.

Setting the laundry basket aside reveals his bed, inviting after a long day of back-breaking labor. He mindlessly makes it all the way into bed- still in his day clothes, too tired to change, before he realizes he's still clutching the note you'd left him, and he lays it carefully on his nightstand. His exhausted body melts into the mattress as he settles, and he turns on his side to face the window instead of his typical stance towards the wall.

He drifts to sleep staring at the phrase 'Anytime you need an extra hand', taking solace in the fact that someone's finally brushing the fingertips of the hand he'd been extending, begging for help as his head sinks below water. He feels a lot like he's drowning, but tonight he can breathe.

[preciouslittle-bhaalbabe]

"Little Dove"

As Astarion makes love to Esme once again after weeks of bonding, she says something that stops his simple plan in its tracks.

Smut, angst, feelings, guilt, fingering, PiV, soft domming, nice simple plans falling apart. ~2k words.

It had been a while since he drank from her last. Since before the intimate night they spent together. The scars were beginning to fade. He kisses her neck softly for a while. Lightly grazing it with his fangs, then biting into her tender flesh as gently as possible. He wraps his other arm back around her, reaching his hand up under her nightshirt, and resting it against her chest to feel her heartbeat. Esme stops painting and humming her tune, sets her brush down and relaxes into him, running her hand along his right leg at her side. Feeding sessions were never really sexual with them before. But he can't ignore the tightness he feels in his trousers with her warm body pressed up against his like this, and her soft hands running up and down his leg, sending chills down his spine. Soft moans escape from his throat against his will as he feeds. It had been a few weeks since that night in the woods. Neither of them had really spoke of it since. There was just a comfortable silence about it. An unspoken bond shared between stolen kisses when nobody was looking, and sleeping in the same tent most nights after everyone else went to bed. He craved her once again, and that was something he didn't plan for.

Esme was sitting cross-legged on the floor of her little tent with her easel lowered to the ground; painting the night sky by candlelight. A half empty glass of wine set on a wooden crate next to her. She hums softly to herself, as she does often. The sounds of the summer night; the crickets chirping, the water of the nearby lake lapping softly against the rocky shore, the crackle of the fire burning low outside, the sounds of her companions sleeping soundly in their tents, it was peaceful. She loved the night and the time she gets to spend under its celestial canvas.

She hears some rustling coming from Astarions tent across the way, and notices he seems to be blowing out the candles in his own little nook. The small flap seperating his space from the rest of the camp opens and he makes his way towards Esme's tent, holding the book he was reading. She smiles to herself then pretends not to notice him coming. Carrying on with her painting and continuing to hum her little tune. Astarion lightly taps on the tent wall and pokes his head in.

"Good evening, little dove" Astarion purrs. "Can't sleep either?"

"Oh! Hello Astarion. Was I being too loud?"

"Not at all, in fact I think your little melodies have lulled everyone else to sleep" he says fondly. He invites himself into her tent and closes the flap behind him.

"I hope you don't mind if I join you?"

"Of course not. You know I always relish your company" Esme says with a sweet smile. Astarion sets his book down on the nearby table next to the half empty glass of wine, walks over to where she's sat on the floor and sits directly behind her. He spreads his legs to either side of her and wraps his arms around her, nuzzling his head into her neck.

"What are you painting?"

"The view of the night sky from atop that temple of Selûne we encountered. The one that's now a goblin camp." Esme says sadly. Seeing the temple dedicated to her goddess defiled like that was a somber sight, and Shadowheart wasn't exactly comforting.

"You're making it look so beautiful. Like how it did during its prime." Astarion says.

"Mhm...Darling, are you hungry? Is that why you came here?" Esme asks.

"I came here because I missed you. But yes, a little. That might just be because I'm sitting behind such a decadent creature though." Astarion says, clearly smiling into her neck.

"You can feed on me tonight, if you'd like" Esme says, continuing her painting. She starts humming absent mindedly once more.

"Thank you darling." Astarion sits there for a few moments, holding her. Listening to her hum that sweet melody and feeling the vibrations from her voice radiate into his body. He adores how soft she is. How safe she feels. How she is the ultimate comfort of his racing mind and yet somehow the very cause of it as well.

Astarion gently moves her silver hair to the side with one hand while keeping his other arm wrapped around her waist. Exposing her pale, slender neck. She was ethereal, with pure white skin and light blue freckles peppered across her soft and kind face, making their way down her body like little stars. Pearlescent white scales lined her cheekbones up to her temples. Indicating her ancestry isn't purely elven. Cold pale blue eyes; curtained by soft, long white lashes, were focused intently on the canvas before her. She looked unlike anything he had seen before. Like she was sculpted from the moon itself.

Astarion focuses on her neck. Flawless for all except the two small puncture scars that indicated past feedings.

He tentatively moves his hand from her heart to her right breast, massaging it. Esme reaches behind her to run her hands through his hair. Breathing slowly. After a few moments like this, she lightly taps his arm to indicate that's enough. He unlatches his fangs from her neck. Licking and kissing the wound gently.

"You alright?" Astarion asks in between placing soft kisses on her left shoulder and tracing against her skin with his hands.

"Mm, mhm" Esme says.

"Oh, already speechless are we?" Astarion purrs.

"No it's just- your hands against my skin. It feels nice. Relaxing even."

"Mhm" Astarion hums, his mouth pressed against her shoulder still. He continues to trace his fingertips against her soft skin, exploring every curve he can reach. Esme seems in almost trance. Her heartbeat slowed and her breathing deep and low. Resting fully with her back against his chest. He moves both hands to her breasts now, tracing around her nipples as he watches them pebble under her nightshirt. His nightshirt actually. But he has let her keep it and he hasn't seen her sleep in anything else since.

"Darling, how would you feel about a little death with me?"

Esme opens her eyes and sits up to turn and look at him. The sudden loss of her warm skin on his makes him almost whimper. Without her, the night feels cold. Esme looks at him with an intense look of lust and desire in her eyes.

"I was wondering if you wanted to do that again" Esme says.

"Of course I do, that time was very special to me" His voice sounds almost desperate. He needed to feel close to her again. He craved it.

"And you, you were lovely". He takes her hand and starts kissing each fingertip. Then he guides her hand to his face to bring her closer. She understands and cups his face with both of her hands and presses her forehead against his. Closing the gap between them once more. Astarion crosses his legs and Esme climbs onto his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck. He places his hands on her hips and starts kissing her softly. Astarions trousers now showing a large and obvious bulge. He moves his hands down to her bottom and grips her flesh. Causing her to move her hips against him. She gasps and grabs the back of his head with a newfound intensity that he hasn't seen from her yet. He wonders how long she had been waiting for this. Not wanting to keep her waiting any longer, he pushes against her, signaling her to stand up with him. Once standing he removes his shirt and trousers. Tossing them to the side.

"Hm" Esme chuckles, eyes full of fondness. "You're a work of art, Astarion".

"I was just going to say the same thing about you, my little dove". Astarion approaches her once again and lifts his nightshirt from her frame. Revealing that she was wearing absolutely nothing underneath. No undies whatsoever.

"Well now, is this a regular habit of yours?" Astarion purrs.

"What can I say? I don't like wearing undergarments" Esme laughs.

Astarion walks over to the small bed Esme has in her tent, climbs onto it and sits down, legs spread.

"Sit in front of me, love. Just like before".

Esme walks over and does as he asks. Sitting cross-legged between his legs on the bed. Astarion begins with placing his hands on her breasts like he was before. Massaging them gently and squeezing her nipples between his fingers. Then, with his left hand he slides down to her sex, already aching with arousal. His cock pressing against her back needily.

"Lean back against me and lift your hips, please".

She adjusts herself accordingly and Astarion slowly slides his fingers down to her clit, rubbing it gently. She's sopping wet already. So he wastes no time in inserting his fingers into her enterance, causing a soft moan to escape Esmes lips.

"That's it, sing for me, little dove"

Esme lets herself go and comes undone as Astarion teases her nipple and fucks her with his fingers. Her voice soft and gentle. He times his breaths with hers with his mouth pressed against her ear. The cold air sending shivers down her spine. He wishes she would scream his name loud, let the entire camp know she was his. But that's not like her. Everything about her is soft and quiet. Docile as a lamb. Her legs shake and her hips buckle as she rides over the edge of bliss. Astarion holds her against him tightly and bites into her shoulder, causing a slightly louder moan to come out from her. He didn't bite her to feed, he wanted to mark her. This sudden possessiveness coming out of seemingly nowhere. Esme collapses against his chest, breathing heavily. Astarion then adjusts positions so she is on her back on the bed and he is on top. He presses himself against her and kisses her deeply with a new hunger he can't quite place. He cradles her head in his hand and spreads her legs open with his knees. Propping himself up with his knees and elbow. Their tongues dancing together in unison. He then sits up for a moment, taking her in. Her eyes wide and wanting, her lips parted slightly and her chest rising and falling with every breath. A faint purply-red flush fills her face and the tips of her ears. She looked just as hungry as he was.

"You are absolutely beautiful" He says, breathless. Esme smiles wide and gestures him to come back to her. He returns to the position he was in and lines his hips up so that his cock is just coaxing her enterance. He moves the head of his cock back and forth along her slit to get the surface as slick as he can. Then pushes himself in. Esmes head reels and her back arches. Astarion runs his free hand along her spine and nuzzles himself into her neck once more. Only he gets to see her like this. His little moon maiden. His quiet and reserved angel. Only he gets to watch as she comes undone by his touch. He feels her walls clench then relax around his newly inserted length. Then he starts rocking his hips slowly. Relishing in every moment inside her. He has made love to countless people but even that first time with her, it has been different. All the time they've spent together. The late nights talking, the random gifts and gestures of affection, the stolen kisses and holding hands when they're alone. All of it was different. These past weeks with her have been nothing but pleasant. She is lovely and treats him with such kindness and care. Even though he lied to her and snapped at her and caused her pain. She has never once stopped being caring and kind. It's driving him mad. He just wanted safety and now he can't imagine life without her.

His thrusts become deeper and more passionate. Causing Esme to moan with that sweet voice he adores so much.

"Mmph, Astarion I-"

Oh gods no. Don't say it. He thinks.

"I love you"

Shit. Astarion whimpers and moans into her neck as those three little words send him into a frenzy. He thrusts into her with all the feelings he has. Anger, lust, guilt, grief, adoration. He pours it all into her. Before he knows it they're both reaching the edge together, and he's cumming harder than he can remember ever before. He falls into her and she wraps her arms around him. Lightly stroking his back with her fingers.

"You don't have to say it back. I just wanted you to know" Esme says sweetly. He can do nothing but hold her. No words come to him. He wants to tell her everything, that he had a plan, that she fell for it, but now things are getting complicated and he doesn't know what to do. He doesn't know what else he can be for her. But none of that matters right now. He can only think about how nice it feels to be held after sex. To not have someone ripped away from him never to be seen again. To have sex because he wanted to. He feels truly loved and cared for. And has no idea what to do about it.

[garagepaperback]

absolutely love your fic recs omg! do you have any recs for authors who are currently still active? i'll read anything but i'm a big fan of stories that take their time and have a slow slow slow burn.

aww thank you for the ask! here are some of my top-tier favorites from ~active~ authors, varying degrees of slow burn:

probationary action - @toomuchplor

this fic is like being in a carnival funhouse where the walls are writhing, panting, dumb-hot, rigorously perfect smut and then slowly, slowly, you recognize all the mirrors and the warped floor are actually soft, glancing sentiment and crisp prose and then you make it back outside to a big, real, aching world. in the parking lot you will have also important thoughts about the punitive justice system.

Harry breathes out a sigh, dropping his face into the open palms of his hands. “Thank Merlin for you, Neville,” Harry says, looking up again. “You really are the best of all of us.” “I’m not,” says Neville, “but I do want to see you happy, Harry.” Harry reaches out and squeezes Neville’s shoulder fondly. “It must be very interesting, dating Malfoy,” says Neville, standing up. “He uses a lot of sex spells, doesn’t he.”

la, who am i to love you? - @epitomereally

a masterpiece! i'm actually getting sun-soaked dazed eyes just thinking about it. perfect, heat-scoured (the riddled-with-light skies! the la fires! the radiant blooming gardens! the fucking pool!) lush location, one of the most interesting takes, and still true-to-the-marrow depictions of harry, draco, pansy, luna - the list is endless. also so hot, and so dear. even the traffic feels dreamy.

“Maybe you could list the pros and cons of moving to LA for me, Harry,” Dr Goldstein prods. Uncomfortably, all Harry can think is Draco, Draco, Draco.

the july tree - @oknowkiss

:,) this is so sweet, fun, hot and adoring from another masterful prose-maker. everything that is glanced at feels so naturally done, the vividness creeps in before you're liable to fully realize you're in fact reading and not truly looking. explorative and understanding. 10/10, wonderful, a hundred gold stars.

His neck was in shambles from where it had been bent over to one side. He tried to move but there was a heavy weight on his shoulder. He looked down and saw Potter had fallen asleep on him. Potter’s hand had slipped between Draco’s legs, just above his knees, and then the train came to a stop and Potter woke up as well, lifting his head, his glasses slightly crooked. Draco wanted to go back an hour and keep himself awake, so that he could feel Potter on him, warm and heavy and unguarded. Instead he’d had only a few seconds before Potter sat up straight, stretching his arms overhead. He smiled at Draco before standing, resting his hand on top of Draco’s head as he walked by. It was lovely, and intimate, but all Draco could think of was the hour he’d slept through, an hour of time spent with Potter he wouldn’t ever get back, his brain repeating over and over, I missed it.

cut from the sky - @mallstars

so much of what i'm desperate to say about this fic is [redacted] for spoiler reasons! such a raw romance wound around an incredible, engaging, heart-stuttering plot. i'm jutting my lip out and there's a vacant ache in my ribs where my heart's supposed to be over this one. lovely, queer, splendid, just perfect. god.

"Please," Harry heard himself say, though he didn't quite know what he was asking. Draco kissed his forehead. "Of course," he replied. "What would you like?" Harry shivered, watching the runnels of water against Draco's flushed cheek. "Please," Harry said again, dropping his head against Draco's leather-clad shoulder, thinking of his hotel room, of stumbling into Draco's store tomorrow, calling him Malfoy and pretending his days didn't revolve entirely around him, "Please don't leave. Please don't leave just yet."

gallows-bird - @jtimu

i want to describe this one with eight knife emoji's and nothing more. four chapters in and every single one individually has ruined my day. it's wonderful, dreary, just enough gray that you'll wonder if the glint you thought you saw was hope or just a trick of the light. highly recommend, misery loves company, come on through.

There hadn’t ever been anyone to soothe Harry’s hurts. To fuss over his skinned knees or brush his hair back from his temples with tender thumbs, too coo softly over a scrape. Comfort was something he’d learned secondhand, dear and hard-bought, and so sat there with his fingers twisted together, knuckles like knotgrass, and tried to wrench the words out. He wanted to touch, instinct told him that much, but he lacked the framework for how and where, and so he didn’t, and they sat there together in a thorny silence.

from love, obviously - @starsworth

counting even though bizarrestars is writing mostly (lovely! gender-explorative! wonderful! wolfstar and also black familial fic currently) not drarry because just god damn. an essential read for me. weirdo, phenomenal draco and the best teddy in the game, easily. hilarious but in that way where your breath snags after laughing really hard and the moment sort of echoes.

"You were kissing," Teddy says. "I saw it."  Harry's eyes sink shut for a moment, and he drags a hand through his hair, which Draco may have accidentally made a mess of, then he blows out a deep breath and opens his eyes. "That's—well, that did happen, yes. That was…something we did."  Teddy's eyes narrow. "I thought you were mortal enemies."  "Mortal enemies kiss…sometimes," Harry says weakly, clearly out of his depth here. He grimaces almost immediately after he says this, then seems to remember he's the adult out of the two of them and coughs, standing up taller. "Nevermind that, you'll understand when you're older."

close behind - @oflights

oh my whole fucking heart. destroyed! adrift! she died how she lived. reading this feels like listening to music, something sleek and melodic, and when i actually consider the masterfully-rendered level of complexity in the plot, it feels like trying to peer into the belly of an actively-playing grand piano. certainly does not hurt to be an enormous fan of eternal sunshine of the spotless mind, orpheus and eurydice myth, and general suffering <3

“It’ll be all right,” Draco said again, and Harry swallowed the rest of his words. He couldn’t let them out here, in their bed, in their home; not yet. And his body didn’t know how to say what he wanted it to, not with Draco this close. Harry didn’t know how to tell Draco that they wouldn’t be all right, not in any language. Not yet.

[sanjisboyfie]

draken would be the best boyfriend. without a doubt. in all aspects.

the way he very fondly calls you "his" in public, as well as anything like that, "my boy," "my boyfriend," etc etc....its so endearing to see this absolute tower of a man just smile in the most innocent way and proudly saying, "oh, can't hang out tonight, my man's keeping me home to watch some shitty movies."

draken's casual dominance is something that really shines through. how many times he's pulled you in closer in crowded rooms by your waist. how many times he's guided you through said crowded rooms by the small of your back. but if it gets really hard to maneuver out of those places, he allows you to either hold onto his hand or his pant's belt loops as he guides you through - with the size of him, the crowd usually disperses in a straight line for him to walk through, thus making it easy for you to follow after him.

or, how he leans down however far he needs to in order for him to clearly hear you if you're in a noisy enviornment. and he goads you into repeating what you said with a smirk and, "no, no, c'mon, babe, i'm listening,"

he is so fucking annoying when it comes to kissing or public affection. not that he shys away from it or even minds, it's the way he purposely uses his height to taunt you. makes you really get on your tippy toes for a kiss, a smirk plastered on his face the entire time you're struggling. or, if he really wants to aggravate you, just completely engulfs your body with his. he hugs you from the back, cages you in his arms, and leaves you almost completely immobile and makes you only be able to move if he does. childish and taunting shit he does that's - kind of really cute and endearing, but draken won't let you walk down the street freely without his 6'1 self completely restricting your bodily movements.

has the most smitten look in his eyes when you do anything. bro is your no.1 fan and isn't ashamed to make it obvious. you could be just ordering your coffee at the counter and he puts his arm around your shoulder and leans into you while saying with a cheesy smile, "my boyfriend's just the cutest, isn't he?" and of course the barista has to agree because, "what do you mean you don't think my boyfriend's the cutest? you wanna explain that to me before i really send your ass flying, bastard?"

really treasures alone time with you. his life is hectic and he just wants to soak in any time he gets with you, just being with you. will hold you close in private moments, his head buried in your neck and shoulder, murmuring about, "i missed my boy all day," with a tired sigh and steady breaths, trying to take in all of your scent.

it's in those moments draken looks undeniably so much smaller than he really is. the way he looks as if he wants your entire presence to swallow him whole - at least, if that happened, he could just stay with you forever. it's the way he is completely buried in your arms, torso, and neck that makes him look so fragile. he's probably spent the whole day catering to other people's needs and following others orders that when he gets home, he just needs you to recharge and really calm down from his hectic schedule.

[dokries]

my boo

pairing: boo seungkwan x gender neutral reader

genre: fluff, established relationship

word count: ~1.1k (with bonus)

warnings: seungkwan being embarrassing in public, going to the beach/sea, mentions of food in the bonus

author note: hi i know it’s may but. here’s a first snow seungkwan fic? i wrote this and originally posted it in early december so…basically, i don’t want to keep this in the drafts until then HAHA once again, this is a repost! if you think you’ve seen it, you probably have :D (it is still my work though of course)

masterlist

“IT’S SNOWING!” you hear seungkwan’s voice right before you get tackled by him on the couch, his limbs trapping you underneath him.

you giggle at his excited expression before looking over his shoulder, seeing the white flakes fall outside through the window. “you’re right, it is. the weather report said there was a 80% chance of snow today.”

he gets up, untangling your bodies before pouting at your cool demeanour. “you’re not excited. why are you not excited?”

you shrug before getting up, groaning from the use of your legs after the time you had spent sitting down. “i mean, it’s not like it doesn’t snow every winter.”

seungkwan gasps before putting a hand to his chest, offended. “are you telling me that your first winter with me isn’t important? we haven’t even had a date in the snow yet! or—or literally anything wintery! i can’t believe this. why do i even love you?” he finishes ranting with a huff, turning his body away from you.

you roll your eyes fondly at your tangerine boy before pulling his hand towards you, urging him to look at your face.

“it’s nothing like that kwannie, i promise,” you say before grinning widely. “and you love me because of my amazing sense of humour and just because i’m great, of course.”

he sighs and gives you a fake annoyed expression before smiling mischievously. “so this means you’ll let me take you to the beach so we can have a photoshoot right? yeah,” he says, pulling your arm to the entryway, giving you no choice but to put up with his antics. (you would anyway; it’s him after all.)

“wait…in this?” you look down at your silly moose pyjamas, and at seungkwan’s matching ones before shaking your head. you knew seungkwan didn’t care—he loved to be open about your relationship, and these pyjamas definitely helped that. besides, it’s winter! you would be wearing a jacket on top anyway.

you let seungkwan put your coat on you (not without a little peck on your forehead to let you know he wasn’t actually mad; you knew he never was when he acted like this) and your socks when you struggle before putting on his own winter gear and opening the door. he lets out a low breath before taking your hand and putting it in his pocket, both your hand—and hearts—warm together.

…

in the car, you clap every time after seungkwan finishes belting out a christmas song from a playlist you had found (how he managed to focus on driving while doing this, you had no idea) and when he parks in the small lot the beach has, you grin, fully excited for your little date.

after your hands reunite in his coat pocket, he takes you to your favourite spot whenever you both went to the beach; a place not too close to the water where you had to worry about getting wet, but also one where you could still see the serene beauty of the ocean clearly.

as you take your phone out of your pocket to take pictures of the icy sea, you hear the sounds of seungkwan’s phone clicking in your direction. when you turn to look at him with a question on your face, he shrugs before saying, “just making sure i take pictures of the best view around here.”

soon enough, your photo taking session comes to an end, and you walk back to your parked car, laughing at a silly picture you took of seungkwan. he takes a look around before running over to a small field nearby covered in fresh snow, before slipping and falling.

“seungkwan?? you okay, honey?” you ask as you run over to his side before your worried expression turns into a deadpan, seeing his pose. he was on his side with his elbow propping up his head, and before you can say anything about how silly he looks, he wiggles his eyebrows. “that was a perfect reenactment of how i fell for you, my pookie dookie snookie pookums.”

before you can shush him and remind him that you’re in public, you hear a loud gasp and a little girl’s voice say, “mommy, look! they’re flirting!” from behind you.

you turn your eyes back to the trail you were walking on with your boyfriend just a few minutes ago, and see a mother cover her young daughter’s eyes from seungkwan’s antics before hurriedly walking away from the scene you two were making.

thankfully, as soon as they leave, there’s no one to see the way you crouch down and smack seungkwan’s shoulder. “what was that for, kwannie?!”

he pouts before sticking out his tongue at you and pulling you down onto the snow beside him. “i was just showing my love for you, my sweetheart plum sugar with two eggs five cups of flour—”

you shut him up with a small peck to his cheek before shooting his lovestruck face a dirty look. “that’s enough out of you now. i’m telling your mother that you embarrass me in public,” you huff, fully knowing that seungkwan’s mother simply adored you.

you giggle when seungkwan makes a sound of indignation and instead peck his cheek again. “fine, fine, i won’t. but…you have to stop using those corny pet names.”

he huffs before sighing dramatically.

“fine. i’ll stop, my five large egg yolks, one and one third cups water…okay i’ll stop,” he finishes off, seeing your face before leaning in to peck your cheek, making you giggle and him smile. “there’s my boo.”

bonus!

in the car, you remember to ask seungkwan something. “what were you even saying? my 2 cups of sugar…was that even an actual recipe?”

he looks at you while fixing his rearview mirror. “yeah, it’s from a recipe for lemon meringue pie.” his neck flushes a bit as he continues, “i was planning to make it for you one day…so it was the first thing i thought of.”

the next day, you wake up to the smell of something burning. you quickly get up and sprint to the kitchen, only to see seungkwan putting something in the trash sheepishly. “…i burnt the pie.”

though it takes a while to get the smell out of your home, and the window needs to be open in the cold weather, you have an excuse to cuddle up with seungkwan in your warmest blanket. (he would anytime you asked anyway; no need for burnt baked goods).