#and i saw one bad review out of curiosity and it made me so annoyed

[hoesamo]

How I imagine the tumblr housamo fandom whenever we’re analyzing and discussing the writing and how it ties back to the og myths, stories, and history.

[therentyoupay]

Jelsa + office/workplace AU for 3 sentence fic please?

♡ image ♡♡ askbox meme ♡♡♡ on ao3 (uninvited)

The early morning fog made Elsa's corner office feel oddly reminiscent of just last week when she'd sat atop the Austrian Alps, sipping fresh dark coffee from her balcony, wondering if Anna truly needed her back in the office by Monday... and knowing all the while that she'd be back, according to schedule, no matter what.

You have no choice.

She stamped down the tiny whisperings of resentment and bitterness and curiosity, and you don't want to be here, you've never wanted to be here, as she meticulously arranged her notes for the morning meeting. Elsa cleared her mind as she sat in her cold, crisp office on the 118th floor, sipping homemade decaf coffee from her familiar thermos, unable to keep from wondering what the look on Anna's face might be, if she—in all her leadership, all her efficiency, all her planning and honesty and meticulous preparations—ever actually found the nerve to step down, step back, step away, and let Anna rise up in her stead, to take control of the company that Elsa had always been too efficient not to lead but had never truly wanted.

"Oh," a voice cut through Elsa's useless daydreaming so quickly she actually started—and was therefore all the more annoyed for it when she saw a young man—James? John? Jacob? she should really know Anna's new temp by now, but she was slipping so quickly, so distracted these days—"My bad, I thought you'd probably want one but it looks like you already got yours."

Elsa glanced to his arms—full of three carriers, honestly, who had sent him out for so many coffees at once, and who did she need to have a word with about the way this company treated their temporary staff?—and then her gaze landed on the compostable to-go cup of black iced coffee labeled decaf and, to her mild horror and amusement, scary boss.

"Uh," he—Jason? Jameson?—was blushing, when he, too, saw the label. Good, she thought, ruthlessly. "Um. They weren't supposed to write that down."

Elsa raised a single brow.

"But!" he was grinning, clearly caught out and not anxious about it in the slightest, and suddenly Elsa had many questions about Anna's newest addition to her staff. (Elsa deliberated—cold and stern? gracious and merciful?—and settled for something in between.) He was starting to back away, anyhow, toward the door, "I didn't realize you bring your coffee from home, and you already have one, so, I won't bother you—"

"If not to me, then to whom might you deliver it?" He froze. She held her thermos aloft, looking him carefully in the eye, so that he could see the gentle curve of her smirk—she saw the edge of tension in his shoulders lessen, watched the glow of his face in early morning skyscraper fog slide into something easier, something more playful.

Interesting.

Disrespect? No, she would have smelled that a mile away.

Unprofessional? A little, certainly, but Elsa—look at what you're doing this very moment?

She watched his eyes flip through possible answers like a gameshow contestant, and he tentatively offered, "... Anna?"

Elsa grinned in spite of herself, at the clear lie within; Anna had many worthy leadership qualities, but she'd always been more approachable than Elsa, no matter the day. Intimidating? When Anna wanted to be, sure. Scary? Hardly.

"A worthy answer," she praised, which had the most interesting result of him lighting up—and blushing again. He was clearly harmless.

Oh, what the hell.

Elsa carefully moved a stack of paperwork—crisp, tidy, ready to be ignored for review—to the side, and pulled a second coaster from its stack, then gently laid the coaster on the corner of her desk. And waited.

"Oh. You don't have to—I mean—"

"Jack," she commanded, as his name flooded back to her in a sudden sweep of memory; Anna had mentioned something about being very excited to hire him on for the next month or two, something about helping a friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend who was down on his luck. "Leave the coffee."

He grinned, clearly pleased with himself. Perhaps a bit too pleased with himself... She stamped down the sudden self-doubt and alarm; it was good for employee morale to keep spirits high and to show some of her humanity whenever she could—snow queen, ice queen, they whispered, when they were too careless to recognize that she had eyes and ears everywhere in this kingdom of hers—but this. Was this too much? What have I done?

He did not immediately provide any relief on that front as he walked up to her desk with a truly shit-eating grin that was already grating along her spine. He carefully balanced all three carriers and delivered her iced coffee to her coaster with an alarmingly apt degree of coordination. Elsa blinked.

"Black, decaf, light ice," he grinned, righting himself and his coffee carriers. "What should I ask them to write on your cup, next time?"

My name? she thought dryly, then paused. For reasons she could not quite pin down, she gave him a level stare and said, "Surprise me."

She'd assumed he couldn't light up any further, but clearly, she was wrong.

With an aye, aye, madam! and an exaggeratedly playful wink—which completely caught her off-guard—he easily and gracefully backed out of the ajar door to her office, which he gently nudged open with his foot—his foot!! like it were a barn door or something!—with 11 more cups of coffee deftly balanced in his capable hands, and was gone.

Elsa suddenly eyed the drink on her desk with a mixture of shock, alarm, and curiosity, knowing deep in her bones that her well-established routine was thoroughly and utterly disrupted. She reminded herself again that he would be gone in only a matter of weeks, anyway; Elsa remembered something now from Anna about how Jack was moving between jobs, between states, floating from place to place, so all of this would be over before it started—before what started, Elsa?! So, really, there was no cause for alarm.

Elsa sipped her unnecessary, uninvited, decaf, black, light-ice, iced coffee, and gazed into the morning New York City fog, and wondered.

[sleepymarmot]

Ocean's Eleven (2001) & Ocean's Twelve (2004)

Ocean's Eleven

This is basically the gold standard of modern masculine coolness, right?

I definitely saw this at some point, but that was so long ago that I remembered nothing of the specifics. I do remember Ocean’s Eight well enough to compare, though, and what I found out today is that Debbie wasn’t the only Ocean sibling to have a surprising amount of gay chemistry with their blond(e) right hand (wo)man. Good for all of them!

Danny/Tess made a valiant effort to keep up, but unfortunately, Tess’s entire character is the weakest part of the film. The story is male-centric to the extreme, and the only woman is a trophy for the protagonist to steal from the antagonist.

None of these people measure up in hotness to Cate Blanchett in Ocean’s Eight, but they did look nice. A special shout out to the bad guy, who suddenly acquired a dark brooding gothic demeanor when he realized his defeat.

Every review describes Ocean’s Eleven with adjectives such as “smooth”, “fun”, and “charming”, which is true, but in addition to that, an essential factor that makes it work as a “feel-good movie” for me is how non-violent it is, despite the hypermasculinity. The target of robbery is utterly unsympathetic, there’s little to no collateral damage, guns only enter the picture as a two second long fakeout. The viewers don’t have the reason to feel bad for anyone and can just bask in the good vibes. (Though personally, I still managed to get nervous a few times during the heist, even though I knew perfectly well that the job would end in success. I’m really not built for any kind of suspense, huh.) It’s extremely shallow, but instead of the common and annoying “pretends to be deep but fails” way, it’s shallow in the “our only goal is to make this as fun as possible” way, and that gets no objections from me.

Ocean's Twelve

I genuinely can’t tell if I’ve watched Ocean’s Twelve before in full or not. I remember the laser dancing sequence, and the Bruce Willis-Julia Roberts stuff feels familiar, but everything else feels totally new to my present self.

They Garak’d Brad Pitt so hard! Literally the first scene of the movie grabs the viewer by the shoulders and shouts “Oh you thought he seemed kinda gay? Here, look, he’s definitely attracted to women!” Also, God, Hollywood kissing close-ups are so obnoxious.

The thief/cop romance is not bad in theory, but felt forced in practice; now that Danny and Tess are back together, we need another obligatory white heterosexual will they/won’t they (that doubles as a no homo, see above). The “reveal” that the legendary thief who might or might not be dead, and the thief father who allegedly died around the same time, are in fact the same person, can be seen from miles away; the real surprise is that Isabel herself didn’t figure it out somehow.

Linus was only slightly annoying in the first one, but here he’s given prolonged scenes that are painfully awkward to watch. What was the point of making him the “immature SJW” if that didn’t even go anywhere?

Vincent Cassel is not as good of an antagonist as Andy García. Watching Terry Benedict threaten the crew at the beginning of the film was actually pretty fun, and the Night Fox just doesn’t have anything to be a worthy successor to that classic villain charisma.

Overall I have to say I was pretty bored. Perhaps it’s my fault for watching the second movie the day after the first, motivated more by curiosity than “I’m really missing the heist movie vibe right now”. Several times I thought “this can’t possibly be the real heist, it’s not good enough”. The final twist was decent if a bit predictable, but it wasn’t enough to justify the whole thing.

I considered completing the marathon with Ocean’s Thirteen (which I have no memory of, either), but perhaps it would be wise to leave it for later. I suspect movies like these work better as palate cleansers or light entertainment, and trying to be completionist with them like with typical series would be counterproductive. For now, it might be better to take a break from action movies starring white American men — I feel testosterone-poisoned already!

[bakugosbratx]

NSFW 18+ The Assistant— AU Levi Ackerman x Fem! Reader

Warning: 18+ Content. Smut, degrading, cursing, punishment, dom levi, sub reader, bondage, bdsm, some angst, toxic relationship, spanking, cheating, etc.

Words: 3, 673

Check out my other works here

A/N: Me and my irl moot @idfkwtfgof came up with this idea so I decided to write it out. Enjoy this fifty shades of gray moment. I’ve been working on this for over a month 🙃 I’m sorry it took me forever.

Tags: @idfkwtfgof @awilddreamerwrites @peachsenpie

You take a deep breath as you approached the double doors in front of you. Your heart pounded against your rib cage. The silent hallways seemed to be echoing the thumps. Anyone in your position would be nervous too if they had to meet with the CEO of the Ackerman Industries. He was not one to enjoy much company nor request it. His gaze alone could intimidate the strongest of people and you are no different.

Fist resting on the wooden door in front of you, you hesitate, but close your eyes and knock anyway. You did not hear a response as you patiently wait. Instead, the door swings open to be met with the CEO himself, Levi Ackerman. Not a word was spoken, but he ushered you inside his huge office.

Scurrying, you slightly jump as you heard the huge door slam. You are in Levi’s office. Only businessmen and women are allowed in here. You feel not even worthy to be stepping on the same floor these successful people walk on. It could also be the fact that the office seemed spotless. For someone as busy as the CEO, he sure did know how to make a stack of papers seem neat in a stack.

“Sit.” Levi instructed as he strolled over to his desk chair and doing the said action. You looked around the room. Behind Levi is a wall of windows to overlook the city of New York. His desk his a beautiful dark brown that was so clean that you could see your reflection. Along with seeing your reflection, you can see —and feel— Levi starring at you. Meeting his silver orbs, you gulp.

“Do you know why I called you in here, Y/N?” Levi questioned, his tone remaining calm as always. Somehow, this intimidated you even more.

“No, sir, I don’t.” You admit. In all honesty, you are not sure why Levi called you into his office. He waited until almost everyone has gone home for the evening to set up this meeting. You have felt nauseous all day about it. Receiving an email from the CEO was enough to make anyone’s breath hitch, but to have a meeting — alone — with him is enough to make one soil themselves.

“I want to offer you a promotion,” Levi explained, his gaze hardening. “That is, if you want it?”

This is way better news than you expected. Levi has employees for a reason. He always calls the shots since it is his million dollar company, but why get his hands dirty when he can pay people to do it for him? Since no one is allowed in his office without special permission, this seemed a bit off.

“What does the job intel?”

“Well, my company is expanding even larger than anticipated this year. I need a personal assistant. Examining the work you have put in over the years, I decided you are cut out for the job. What do you say?”

You take a moment to contemplate his words. The offer is amazing and would definitely look great on your resume, but working so close to the CEO of the company is quite intimidating. Any bad habits you have developed better end swiftly or else it’s your job on the line. Levi is not afraid to terminate anyone not fit for the job.

“I’ll take it.” You smile, the words flowing out before you could even think any further.

“You start tomorrow. I expect you in my office 8am sharp. Do I make myself clear?”

“Yes, sir.”

“You’re dismissed.”

Standing up, you straighten out your black pencil skirt and head your way towards the door. Levi’s eyes did not once leave your figure. The way you naturally sway your hips as you walk and the way the skirt hugged your hips just right. His eyes are enjoying the desires most men have yet when you turned to look over your shoulder, his eyes where focused on his paperwork.

You went home that night, excited to tell your significant other about your promotion. He did not even blink an eye in your direction. Instead, he is pissed that you are home later than normal.

“Babe—“

“Where the hell have you been?” He hissed.

“I-I was called into the CEO’s office. I got a promotion!” You stammered, nervous under your boyfriend’s glare. He always made you feel small and his anger tends to send you over the edge. This is one of those many times.

“Why would he have you in there this late? Do you think I’m really that fucking stupid?” He scoffed, shaking his head.

“Babe, I’m being serious. I would never lie to you.” You argued.

“And how do I know that?” He countered. “How am I certain that you aren’t cheating on me? Or even hurt? Are your damn thumbs broken, Y/N? Can’t keep me updated ‘bout what’s going on? I was worried sick about you.”

You let out a heavy sigh. “I’m sorry, babe. I’ll do better.”

Your boyfriend walked over to you, embracing your body into a tight hug. You had so much more to say, but to prevent any further escalation of an argument, you apologized and kept your mouth shut.

The next morning arrived. You woke up extra early to have time to do your hair and makeup, dressed in your nicest attire, and wear the most expensive of jewelry. Since you are going to be around the CEO for now on, you cannot show up to work appearing sluggish. You gave yourself one last look in the mirror, your boyfriend leaning against the doorframe.

“Dressed quite nicely, huh?” He spoke, meeting your eyes through the mirror. You swallowed the lump that formed in your throat.

“I have to be.”

He stayed silent for a moment, his orbs tracing your figure. He hated when you showed confidence. It killed him inside and knowing that other men saw your beauty as well made his blood boil. He just has to ruin it.

“For the circus? Your makeup looks awful and your hair is tremendous.” He scoffed.

You bit your bottom lip. Tears welled in your eyes, but you prevented them from falling. You refuse to let him ruin your confidence. You are a strong woman and his insecurities shouldn’t be placed upon you. It is not your baggage to carry.

You meet his eyes again through the mirror. You feel your confidence crumble beneath you, but you remain strong. Turning around, you brush past him as you stroll out of the bathroom. You ignored him calling your name and demanding you to return. All he could do is watch as you left without even saying goodbye.

You arrived to the business earlier than expected. You have checked your hair and makeup more than once in the car review mirror. You are not necessarily even wanting Levi’s approval, — though he is quite handsome — you just want to look presentable. He is your boss, after all. He is not afraid to fire anyone on the spot. You are no exception.

Inhaling a sharp breath, you knock on Levi’s office door. You hear his approval to come inside and welcome yourself inside. You were not even receive a glance as you closed the door behind you. Levi’s gray orbs never left his monitor screen. You gulp nervously as you proceed towards his desk.

“I stopped to get some coffee. I brought you a tea,” you lay his cup on his desk, “just how you like it.”

He nods, still typing away. This did not help your anxiety at all. Is he regretting his decision making you his assistant? Are you disturbing him? Is he contemplating firing you? Your stomach turned at the thought.

The sound of the printer disturbed your nuisance thoughts. Levi grabbed the piece of paper and placed it on top of a neat stack. He stands up, finally looking at you.

“I have a meeting to attend to in an hour. I need these documents assorted in alphabetical order before then.”

Your eyes fall to the tall stack of papers. You definitely need more than an hour to get through them all. By Levi’s facial expression, you knew he was serious. Levi always looked serious.

“Yes, sir,” you grab the stack and meet his a gaze again, “I’ll get it done swiftly.”

“Good. I’m counting on you. Sit over there.” He orders, glancing at the couches and coffee table in the middle of his office. Maybe it is just your nerves, but his workspace seems bigger than remembered. This did not help your anxiety.

You began getting to work. You thought you are doing well on time, but time seemed to have passed you by. Levi is now towering over you, his unsatisfied silver orbs glaring down at you. You hesitate, but force yourself to meet them.

“Thought you said you would have this done?” Levi recalls.

“I-I’m really sorry, s-sir.” You stammered, expecting the worse.

“Sorry doesn’t sort the papers, Y/N.” He scolds, his silver eyes only being shown through slits.

“I—“

“We will discuss this after my meeting. Until then, I want my office spotless.” Levi continues, cutting you off. He begins walking towards the door and pauses once he reaches for the handle. “Oh and Y/N?”

You look up, meeting the CEO’s annoyed orbs. “Yes, sir?”

“You’re on strike one.” Levi warns. You did not even have a chance to ask questions as his office door slams shut behind him, leaving you alone to sulk in your thoughts.

You tidied up Levi’s office like he requested of you. Every paper went into its appropriate home, cushions are straightened out, rug is vacuumed, and you are currently dusting. This man is a clean freak by nature so there was not much to do. Still, your nerves were pulsating. This is only day one and you are not on Levi’s good side. You are becoming worrisome as your job is now potentially on the line.

The door opening made you jump. You can feel Levi’s silver orbs on you as you dust his bookshelf. He did not disturb you, though, as he proceeded towards his desk and went to work like nothing happened. Curiosity is begging you to speak, but you remain silent and complete your task.

You gather the cleaning supplies and place them back into the small closet. Returning on the guest side of Levi’s desk, he does not even look up from his monitor.

“I’m finished cleaning, sir.”

Levi did not say anything. Instead, he stood up and went to the window. His fingers grazed along the exterior which collected dust on the tips. He studied it for a moment. Your heart stopped as your breath hitched. You did not mean to forget the windows, but they look so clean already. They truly do not need much more cleaning.

“Seems like you missed a spot.” He remarks, turning to face you.

“I-I’m so sorry, sir. I thought—“

“Your cleaning is lamentable. Back to dusting. Now.” He demands, cleaning the dust off of his fingers with his handkerchief.

“Yes, sir.” You reply, gathering the cleaning supplies once again. You sprayed the windows and clean every inch of them until lunch time. Levi was sure to inspect your work before releasing you to go get something to eat.

“You’re dismissed.” He finally speaks. You are quick to collect your belongings leave his office. You stroll the long hallway to the elevator. You are finally alone with your thoughts and honestly, they were overwhelming. This job is very nerve racking and it’s only your first day. You are not making the best of impressions on your boss.

Digging in your purse, you check your cellphone. You have several missed calls and texts from your significant other. A pit in your stomach began to drown your appetite. You know this is going to cause a major fight between you two. A fight you did not want to participate in.

Reluctantly, you call your boyfriend back. He picks up on the second ring.

“Where the fuck have you been?” He hissed, sending chills down your spine. The elevator doors open and you head towards the cafeteria.

“Working. I can’t be on my phone while I’m—“

“So work is more important than me?” He interrupts.

“What? No. That’s not it at all.” You argued, picking up a bag of chips and a drink from the dispensers before checking out.

“Then answer my damn calls, Y/N!”

“I can’t when I’m at work!” You exclaimed. You hand the cashier money before mouthing the words ‘thank you.’ She gave you a worried look, but you disregarded it. This is not the first time that have heard a heated conversation between you and your boyfriend.

You go find an empty table to eat by yourself. The bickering between your boyfriend did not end on a good note as the other line went dead. You slammed your phone back into your purse and forced yourself to eat your chips. You did not even want them. Your relationship is falling through the cracks, you are failing at your job, and you are on the verge of losing what is left of your sanity.

Time really slipped away while you fumed in anger because you are now late to returning to Levi’s office. Tears prickled in your eyes. This is not good at all. Levi is going to be furious. Even possibly firing you.

You raced to his office. You did not even take the elevator as it will take far too long to get to his office. You are panting by the time you arrive and sweat droplets formed at the top of your forehead. Your hands began to shake as your hand rested on the handle. You need to go in there, but your body did not want to move. Your boyfriend is already pissed. You did not want to deal with your furious boss.

Sighing, you forced yourself to go inside. “I am so sorry.” You blurt out as you enter inside. Levi is giving you a disapproving look.

“Take a seat, Y/N. We need to have a talk.”

Following your boss’ orders, you sit in the chair parallel to his. You begin to tremble as you expect the worse. Levi’s glare does not help you feel any less uneasy either. His silver orbs are staring deep into your soul and making you feel small.

“You know you’re on strike three.” Levi begins. You gulp.

“I know, sir. I’m very sorry. I’ll accept any punishment you have in mind for me.” You sigh, trying to remain brave. Levi can see right through it, though. His gaze hardens and he makes his way around to your side of the desk. He folds his arms but does not remove his gaze from you once.

“What punishment do you think you deserve?” Levi ask, hoping you have the same answer in mind as him.

“I-I’m not sure. I’ll take anything. It’s what I deserve.” You admit, a flustered feeling coming across you. Levi studied your features, clicking his tongue.

“Bend over the desk.”

“What?” You whispered, not sure if you heard your boss correctly. He grabbed your chin, forcing you to look at him. His intimidating glare pierced through you.

“Talking to that lame ass boyfriend of yours must have you goin deaf. I said bend over my desk.” Levi instructs, letting go of your chin once you catch his drift. You do as your told, bending over his desk. You are uncertain what he is planning to do, but the removal of your skirt gave you a pretty good idea. Your cheeks felt hot as your bare ass is now exposed to Levi’s viewing.

“Lace panties, huh? You planned on being put in this position later?” Levi chuckles, his digits playing with the strap of your thong. You bit your bottom lip, not knowing what to say. A hard smack to your bare ass caused you to release a moan.

“I asked you a question. It’s only polite to answer, brat.”

“Yes. It was for my boyfriend.” You confess in embarrassment for more reasons than one.

“Oh, I see. Your toxic little relationship is in need of fixing, but the only thing you have to offer is your pretty little pussy.” Levi analyzes, rubbing his hand on your ass before delivering another slap. You wince in pain, but you mentally screamed for more. You wanted Levi to continue spanking you.

“That’s not it, sir.” You mumbled. His hand landed down on your sore ass once more while the other hand finds refuge in your hair. He pulls it, tightly, bending your head back.

“What really gets me is this mouth of yours. I suggest you use it to tell the truth before I stuff it.” Levi growls lowly in your ear, letting go of your hair to return behind you.

Another slap was delivered. Little melodies of moans escaped your lips that you attempted to conceal. Levi did not comment on it as he proceed with the punishment. Your cunt dripped with your slick. It is begging to be touched, fucked, anything Levi desires really.

A few slaps and a very red ass later, Levi’s digits founder their way inside your soaked cunt. “Someone enjoyed themselves, hm?” He teased, curling his fingers in you. You shuffle a bit, enjoying the sensation he is giving you. The removal of his fingers made you whine in a needy tone.

“I did, Levi. Please fuck me.” You cry, wanting his cock already. He chuckled at your begging, his hand rubbing your red ass then hitting it again.

“On your knees. Now.” Levi demands. You happily oblige before him. He pats your head in approval. “Good girl. You do know how to listen.”

Levi begins unbuckling his black belt. You are practically foaming at the mouth as he slides the leather out of each loop. He sets it on the desk before proceeding to unbuckle his pants, releasing his hard cock for you to pleasure. Your eyes light up at the sight. The tip of his erection is at your lips, ready for you to move forward. Your tongue teases his sensitive head before you let each inch slide in-and-out of your saliva filled mouth.

“Yeah, like that, baby.” Levi praises as you deep throat his length. You choke some, but continue taking all of his cock. Your tongue spends time playing with the veins in his cock while his head relaxes in your throat.

“The cock hungry slut having a hard time deep throating all my cock?” Levi mocks as you pull it out to catch your breath. A string of saliva connected your lips and his cock together as your lust filled orbs met his.

“Not a chance.” You grin, placing his dick back in your mouth. Levi groans in delight as you repeat the same patterns as before. His cock twitches inside your mouth as pre-cum leaks from the tip and down your throat. You gladly swallow it as his cock becomes overwhelmed, releasing his semen onto your tongue. Not a drop was spilled as you milked his cock for all he had to offer.

Pulling away, Levi praises you again. “Such a good little slut you are. Time we give your pussy some attention, huh?”

“Yes, please, sir.” You beg, eagerly. He taps his desk.

“Bend over my desk.” He commands. Following orders, you bend over his desk like before. You arched your back so your ass and pussy is more accessible for Levi. He spreads your legs out more so your weeping cunt is fully exposed. The cold air sent chills down your spine. Levi is already hard again as he stares at your pussy.

Aligning himself, the tip of his cock enters your dripping hole, sliding in perfectly. You moan as he thrust a rough rhythm. His hips slap against your ass and his hands cling onto your hips. You tightly hang onto his desk as he pick up the pace. You sob out pleas for more.

“Better quiet down. Don’t want your coworkers hearing me fuck you like the whore you are now do we?”

You did not even care. You wanted Levi and you wanted him bad. Groans and profanities filled the room from you two as Levi hits all the right spots. You babble incoherent sentences as you start to climax again on Levi’s girth. Your walls clenched on his size and released when he re-enters himself. This does not stop Levi, though, as he chases after his own high.

“Already cumming again, slut?” Levi teases as he is slowly losing himself inside you. He hit your ass again while his dick twitches. “Ask permission next time.”

“I’m sorry, sir.” You cry out, not wanting him to stop. He pulls on your hair again, bending down to whisper in your ear.

“I’m going to fill you up so much that you have to hide it from your boyfriend.”

“Please Levi.” You beg, not even caring anymore. You wanted Levi. You have wanted him for a long time and the feeling is mutual on his end. That is why he hired you, after all.

Levi’s cock could not withstand the pressure anymore. Releasing into the depths of your cunt, he huffs profanities as every drop enters inside of you. You gladly take it as you breathe heavily. He finally pulls out, leaving you a cum filled mess. Giving your ass a gentle tap so you will get up.

“You are dismissed for the day.” Levi grumbled as he situated himself and you did the same. You straightened out your outfit and fixed your hair. You will fix your makeup in the restroom. You proceeded to exit your boss’ office when he called out to you. “Oh, and Y/N?”

“Yes?” You purred, looking over your shoulder.

“Let your boyfriend know you’re my slut now.”

©bakugosbratx

All Rights Reserved

[tomtenadia]

A Little Braver - ch. 5

So, here is ch. 5 for you all.

We finally get to meet the mysterious man that Aelin was kissing.

Also, the firehouse gets a great news

Enjoy it!

Ten days had passed. Aelin had been discharged from the hospital and allowed to move around in crutches providing she took it easy, a concept totally alien to her. She had gone back to the station as soon as she could do it.

The deadline for the performance review was fast approaching and she had spent the last few days at the station. They only got a week extension so she had offered to help but all she could do was sit and direct the show. Also, working kept her mind off… things… and as in things she meant a certain arsehole who had gone completely awol. She had texted him and never got a reply. Lately every time she tried to phone him she was told that the phone was not available. So she had stopped. He clearly was offended by what she had said. She just wished he had spoken to her, explained why her confession had terrified him so much. Just as she had finally found the resolve to try again after losing Sam, he had gone and ruined everything.

A glove hit her face “planet Earth calls Aelin.”

She refocused for a second and noticed Ansel’s red mane of hair in front of her.

“Dorian is looking for you. He is in your office and Aedion is there already.”

Aelin groaned “can they come to the couch? I am so comfy here.”

“Apparently not.”

“Fine.” She dropped the documents she was revising and grabbed her crutches and pulled herself up.

At snail pace she made her way to her office and once she got there she saw Aedion standing in front of her desk while Dorian had his feet up on it and was sitting relaxed on her comfortable chair.

“I don’t care if you are the chief. First, feet off my desk, second, arse off my chair.”

Dorian moved away and let her sit down and grabbed her crutches.

“So, what is so important that I had to leave my spot on the couch?”

Dorian passed her the documents he was holding, with a grin. He was positive this was going to cheer her up.

“No fucking way. You did it.”

He smiled at her smugly “Not entirely my merit.” He confessed “As you remember, the community protested in front of the government in the aftermath of the embankment accident. They did it just before the budget review was due. The government could not ignore them and what you all did that night. And I guess that the statement from your cheerleader had helped a lot as well.”

“Who?”

“Someone I am not allowed to mention in your presence.”

Aelin stare darkened all of a sudden.

“We are getting a second engine, but that engine needs staff.” She pointed out, her excitement taking a hit “I was just getting to that” added Dorian quite quickly, “Thomas has offered to give you a few men to help staff the second engine. It will have a mixed crew of newbies and experienced staff for a while. Aedion and I thought it was the best way to go.”

Aelin nodded “I want to help interview the candidates. Aedion is busy with drills. I, on the other hand, I have plenty of time.”

“As if I can sideline you. You are the captain after all.” Added Dorian knowing full well that if Aelin had her mind set on a task it was almost impossible to dissuade her.

“I want a bigger female presence. I can’t believe that from all the candidates that graduate from the academy there are no good female firefighters.”

“I can spread the news at the academy and see who applies and go from there.”

“Good.” Aelin relaxed on the chair.

“We have also have been invited to a party thrown by the mayor.”

“You are joking.” Aelin hated that kind of party. She had been to a few and it had been a nightmare.

“There is no escaping it. We have all the be present and dress mess is required.”

“My leg is in a protective support, if I wear dress mess I need to wear the skirt which means heels and can you see where I am going with this?” Aelin protested.

“I guess we can do an exception for you. Wear your regular blue trousers, make sure your boots are shining and wear your uniform shirt with the tie, not the t-shirt. And don’t forget the hat.”

“I can live with that.”

“When is the dreadful event?” Asked Aedion who hated those ceremonies just as much as Aelin.

“This Saturday.”

“We are on night shift, you genius.”

Dorian smiled dangerously “Not anymore. Second team is taking the night shift. Let me remind you that attendance is compulsory and pass the info to the team.”

“Yes, Chief.” And Aelin was very tempted to flip him off, but he was still her boss.

“Lys and Elide are to come as well. They are part of the team.”

“Oh so, no one is immune to this horrible shenanigans. Lovely.” Aelin sat back, still annoyed at the invitation.

“No darling, if I have to suffer, you will all go down with me.” And with that Dorian disappeared behind the door.

“Come on Aedion, let’s go and ruin the team’s day.”

Slowly the two made their way back in the common area where the squad was relaxing. Aedion had put them through a gruelling session of drills in the morning and now they needed time to unwind. No one had taken nicely the fact that the review has been postponed only by a week, but at least they hadn’t asked Aelin to attend as well with a destroyed knee. She would be there of course but on the sidelines.

“Ok, people,” Aelin shouted as she slowly made her way to her team “Brullo, switch off the tv for a minute.”

“That doesn’t sound promising,” complained Ren.

“Where are Lys and Elide?”

“In the ambulance doing inventory.” Replied Nox.

“Ok, can you please go and get them?” She asked him.

He nodded and ran away and got back a few moments later with the two ladies in tow.

“Ladies, sit.”

“Uh oh.” Said Lysandra, sitting on Aedion’s lap.

“Now that everyone is here, I have an announcement.” She smiled wickedly and the team shivered. That was her scary smile “Our esteemed mayor has decided to throw a party this Saturday. Bad news is… we are all invited so that he can show us how he appreciates what we do for the community.”

“Fuck no,” shouted Ansel, while finishing the bowl of cereals she was eating.

“We are on night shift.” Added Brullo.

“No we are not. Dorian gave the shift to second team. We are all free.”

A chorus of very rude words erupted from the team. Yeah, everyone hated those parties.

“Oh and by the way… it has to be dress mess.”

The protests grew louder. Aelin let them vent for a moment before putting an end to it.

“Guys!” She shouted, and the room went quiet “I know none of us like those parties, but my hands are tied. Dorian made it pretty clear that this is mandatory. So, protest how you want but there is no getting out of it.”

The team went back to their protest when Aelin raised her voice again “Did I say I was done?”

The group went silent again.

“The second piece of information is hopefully a bit more welcome.” And she really hoped so “we are getting our second engine.”

The cheers that erupted from the team were of pure joy.

“How did you do it?”

“You have to thank Dorian. He is the one who pulled the trick.” And Rowan apparently. No, she was not going there.

“He really is better than his old man. We have been pleading the old bastard for ages and nothing. A few months in charge and Dorian gives us the second engine. If it wasn’t that I am I straight I’d kiss the guy.” Said Ren happily and everyone laughed. 

Good, Aelin thought, they needed the good spirits.

“How will we do for crew?” Asked Ansel.

“Thomas is willing to give us some of his experienced men from one of his engines and take a few newbies. We’ll man the engine with a hybrid crew. Half experienced and half newbies. I need everyone to help with training. Aedion and I will do the main stuff but you guys are involved in this as well. I am out of commission for a while so I can only do classroom training.”

“We’ll help you, cap.” Chimed Nox happily.

Aelin turned to Ansel “I have asked to have a few more ladies in the team.”

“Thanks for that. Far too much testosterone in here.”

Aelin sat back down on the sofa, her knee started to get sore again “We are going to have other women hopefully, just don’t break their hearts.” She told Ansel.

Two of the guys sprayed what they were drinking, Aelin laughed “Oh come on, don’t tell me you had no idea Ansel was swinging on both sides.” Joked Aelin smiling at the woman.

“Both…” asked Brullo still quite shocked.

Ansel drank her coffee very calmly “Men, women, on a few occasion both at the same time.”

Aelin laughed at the expression of the guys.

“Ansel, I think you broke our boys.”

Aelin mobile went off and for a moment she hoped. But that hope had been short lived.

“Give me two minutes,” she said at the person at the phone. She stood and very slowly she made her way back to her office.

Once she got off the phone she stayed in her office to work. Then the dispatch siren went off and she heard the team depart and staying behind broke her heart.

She worked a bit longer but her mind could never fully concentrate. So she decided to do something stupid while the team was out on a call. She booked a taxi and not long after she was in front of the station waiting for her ride.

The driver got her at the airbase pretty quickly. She took out her pass and she hoped it worked even without him about. The man at the main gate let her through after checking her badge. So apparently he had told people she was allowed on the premises. That was a start. Painfully she reached the second check point and a guard approached her. Ok, her luck had already ran out.

“Can I help you, miss?”

“Yes, I am here to see captain Whitethorn.”

The man looked at her with curiosity for a second.

Did she got to the right airbase? As far as she knew there was only one and the first guy let her in.

“I am sorry miss but the captain and his team left a week ago.”

“Left?” Her voice trembled.

“Yes ma’am. They have been recalled and deployed a week ago.”

“Oh.” Was all Aelin managed “Th— thank you.” She turned and made her way back to the exit. Her heart slowly breaking. She sat down on a cement wall and let the sobs come. She took the phone and dialled his number and it went to voicemail “You could have told me. Instead you left. You just left me. Do you really hate me that much?” She sobbed and brushed her hand against her eyes “I hate you and I wish I never met you. Don’t ever bother look for me when you come back… I don’t want to see your face anywhere near my station. I am done with you, captain.” She hung up the phone and lowered her head and kept crying. She was done with men. She was done with pain and a broken heart. It was not worth it.

Eventually she pulled herself upright again and started walking. She had no idea to where, which she then realised that with crutches was a really bad idea. She had to stop a few times, exhaustion taking root. But the pain in her leg was keeping away the pain in her soul. It was much later when she realised she ended up in the west of Orynth and decided to go to west station, perhaps she could bribe the guys to give her a lift back to her firehouse.

Once outside the station, Thomas was the first one who noticed her. He ran to her and Aelin collapsed in his arm.

“Aelin, what are you doing here?’

“I need to sit” was all she managed. He lifted her in his arms and carried her to the section with all the bunk beds. He placed the crutches on the floor and sat on the bed at her side.

“What happened?” He asked when he noticed her puffy eyes “Why are you over here? On your own?”

“I was at the airbase.”

Thomas looked at her in shock “are you telling me that you walked in your condition from the airbase to here?”

Aelin nodded. “Can you give me a lift back?”

“Of course,” he patted her leg “let me go and tell the guys.”

He came back not long after, and lifted her in his arms “Let’s go.”

Once in the car Aelin relaxed and leaned her head against the window.

“Excited about the big night with the Mayor?”

Aelin groaned and Thomas laughed.

“Exactly the reaction my whole team had as well.”

She sighed “Dorian said it’s mandatory and I think for the very first time I have been this close to hit him. But he still is my superior.”

Thomas chuckled “If there is someone who can hit the chief without repercussions is you.”

Aelin turned and looked at him with a questioning stare.

“I mean because you are close. It’s not news that the man is madly in love with you. He might let you off if you beat him. Actually he might even like it.”

This time it was Aelin’s turn to laugh “Dorian and I… nothing ever happened. We are just really good friends. Not even a kiss.”

“So now the news is that you have your eyes set on a certain airforce captain.”

Aelin tensed at those words “You all are a bunch of crazy gossiper, you know that?”

Thomas shrugged “What did he do?”

“I don’t want to talk about him.” Her tone hard and the man at her side realised it was time to shut up. They were at her station anyway.

Aelin noticed the engine was back and she knew she was in trouble. They clearly had noticed her absence. When she decided to look at her phone again she saw a lot of message and missed phone calls from Aedion. Damn, she was screwed.

“Here you are, my lady.”

Aelin leaned over and kissed him on the cheek “thank you so much for the ride.”

“Anytime.” He opened his mouth as if to speak, then stopped and tried again “if you need to talk, I am here. I know you have your friends, but if you prefer to talk with someone who is not around you all day, I am here.”

“You are wonderful.”

He helped her get out of the car, they said goodbye and he drove away again.

Aedion came marching on as soon as he noticed she was back “where the hell have you been? Why don’t you answer your bloody phone? We came back and you were not here, where you were supposed to be.” She felt bad for making them all worry but she did not feel like explaining herself so she just moved past him and in silence she dragged herself to her office and slammed the door shut.

She sat down at her desk and plopped her leg on the spare chair the guys had placed at her side so she could stretch her injured leg, hoping for the pain to subside. She took a few minutes for herself, then texted Lysandra telling her she needed her and Elide.

The two women arrived a few minutes later. They sat on the chair in front of her desk and Aelin knew that Lys was just as mad as Aedion had been.

“Where were you? We came back and you were gone.”

“I went to the airbase.” She confessed, looking outside the window, the sky looked heavy grey and she was positive snow was coming.

“As in the airbase. His airbase.”

Aelin nodded “I needed answers. I needed to know why he left that way. I had to ask him why all this hate.”

“And?”

Aelin felt tears sting her eyes again “he was gone.” She paused “the whole team has been recalled and left for a mission a week ago. No goodbyes. Nothing. He just took off.”

Lysandra stood and ran to hug her friend “what an arsehole.”

Aelin started sobbing again “all I could do was leave him an angry voicemail telling to get away from me forever.”

“I am seriously going to kick his arse.”

Aelin pulled back from the hug “Not worth it remember?”

“We all go to that stupid party and we’ll find you a man there. Perhaps a hot wealthy man.”

Aelin chuckled “You know what, screw it. I’ll remain single all my life and if I want a good time I might ask Ansel.”

The two women laughed “she might take you up on that, you know, right?” Added Lysandra.

“Can we just stop talking about it? Fine he is hot but is he not a nice man. I want to forget that I even contemplated the fact that I had feelings for the bastard.”

“Copy that. I will pass the message along.”

“Have you considered that he might not be able to reply to you because of where he is? Perhaps he is on an aircraft carrier in the middle of the sea.”

Lysandra and Aelin stared at Elide.

“What?” She said shrugging “Lorcan gave me his number, he told me to text him. But he added as well that in the case he was going to leave for a mission not to worry if he did not reply because sometimes their phones don’t work.”

“So you knew they were away?”

“No,” replied the woman lifting her hands “I haven’t heard from him in a while. He is not the greatest of texter and I haven’t spoken to him in a while. I had no idea he was away until now when you told us.”

“Basically airforce boys do not know how to communicate. Got it.” Sarcasm dripping from Aelin’s voice.

Aelin shifted uncomfortably in her chair and Lysandra noticed that.

“Are you okay.”

“Just my leg, bothering me like hell today.”

“Sure, if you only just didn’t walk from the airbase to west station…”

Dispatch alarm went off and the two ladies ran out as the ambulance was needed.

Aelin tried going back to work but her brain was not there.

Out of boredom and curiosity and probably a deep desire for punishment she looked up the captain online. The search engine brought up a page about him. He was only two years older than her. Native of Wendlyn but moved to Terrasen when he was quite young for his father’s job. According to the article he climbed the ranks quite quickly and was thought to be one of the most promising captain in the TAF in a very long time.

“Nerd.” She joked.

Then she scrolled down to personal life and she got even more curious but froze when she read the paragraph.

Fuck.

The man had been married. His pregnant wife had died in a car accident over a year and a half before. She opened the link to the newspaper article about the accident and noticed the picture of the accident site. Her eyes fell on one detail of the image and swore.

She stood and wobbling she went to the file cabinet where she kept the reports for the old cases. She found the one she needed and sat back down. Lyria Whitethorn, that was the name of the woman. She had a look through the case file. She did remember it. It had snowed heavily and the road and had been icy and pretty bad in some areas of town. That accident had been horrendous and it had involved quite a few cars. Lyria’s car had been stuck under a lorry. According to the police it seemed like it had lost control and smashed under the lorry that had crashed against the barriers at the side of the road. She died on impact. It had been an horrendous night. They spent hours working under the snow and only one person had come out alive from that disaster.

She leaned back and felt tears running down her face. They had one big thing in common. They both had lost someone they loved. And all of a sudden it hit her. His reaction. His fear. And for a moment contemplated that he was just as scared as her to get involved again. She closed the file and  grabbed her head in her hands. How badly had she fucked up? 

She took her phone and dialled his number. The number was not available and she left him a voicemail message again “Hey it’s me again. I know you are away and probably can’t get this message. If you listen to the old one as well, just ignore it. I was mad. I did not mean it. I… just… let’s just talk when you get back. Please. Be safe, okay?”

She leaned back in her chair, closed her eyes and cried for both of them, for what they had lost and for the fear of committing again. 

Saturday eventually arrived and Aelin was at home getting ready for the party. Lysandra and Elide had joined her since Lys was going to drive them all.

Aelin had been in a bad mood since her discovery about Rowan but had not told anyone about it. To do so would mean reveal his secret and she could not to do that. It was far too personal.

“You’d think that being barely able to walk would excuse me from such horrible events.” She growled while tying her tie.

“You have been in a funk for a few days. Are you okay?” Lysandra had noticed her bad mood.

“Fine.” She snapped. “I am sorry…”

“Just don’t piss off any politicians, okay? We need them.”

Aelin sighed “I will behave.”

They arrived at the venue not long after and they noticed the already high number of cars present.

“Are we too late to bail?” Asked Elide who had been uncomfortable as well at the idea.

“Unless you want Dorian to rip you a new one, I would leave aside that plan for now.”

The three women made their way to the main entrance where someone checked their names against a list. Aelin for a moment hoped that someone had messed up and forgot to add them.

But that hope died quickly when the man greeted them a bit too happily.

“Ok, are we ready?” Said Aelin gathering the courage she needed to face such a horrible night.

They entered the venue and the notes of classical music hit them.

“At least they have great taste in music.” Commented Aelin staring at the great hall.

Dorian spotted them from the distance and walked to them with a brisk pace “Ladies, you made it. wonderful. Go, mingle, have fun. There’s plenty of food.” He grabbed Aelin’s hand “You come with me. The mayor wants to meet you.”

“What?” Blurted Aelin, sweating cold all of a sudden.

“The mayor would like to speak with you. He met Thomas already. Now it’s your turn.”

“I am not speaking to the mayor.”

“Aelin… this is an order from your superior.”

The woman growled back “Oh, so pulling rank, now?”

“Come,” he repeated.

Aelin turned to Lysandra and Elide “if I don’t come back soon, please come and get me. I love you both.”

Dorian rolled his eyes and he started walking and Aelin followed behind.

Eventually they arrived where the mayor was entertaining some guest and Aelin wanted to turn away, but Dorian sensed her intentions and placed a hand on her lower back in warning.

“Ah, Dorian, I see you have captain Galathynius with you. Wonderful.”

Aelin leaned on one crutch and extended her hand to the man “please to meet you sir.”

“The honour is mine captain. And thank you for coming even in your conditions.”

As if I had a choice and she looked at Dorian glaring at him.

“I just wanted to offer my thank you in person for what you do in the community and what you did the night of the embankment accident.”

“The community comes first.” She commented and Dorian gently nudged her sides at her comment.

“You are absolutely correct, captain. I am aware that you will be getting a second engine at east station, I hope this is a welcomed news.”

Aelin smiled “Very much sir. It has been a long time coming and we are very excited.”

“This is my email,” he gave her a business card “email me. Any idea, concerns or anything else related to your job. I will do my best to make it happen.”

Aelin took the card and was speechless. 

“Now unfortunately being the host forces me to go around and be pleasant with all these strangers. I don’t think there is alcohol enough to survive such an evening.”

He gave her a huge grin, waved at Dorian and walked away.

“Are we sure that was the mayor?”

Dorian nodded dumbfounded.

“Do you think he was drunk?”

Dorian shrugged, just as confused as her “Just don’t loose that card.” The man then left her and she had a moment alone to look around and enjoy the music. She hadn’t been at a classical concert in a lifetime and missed it. Or at the opera. She wanted to go to the opera again.

She had her eyes closed when she perceived a figure at her side. She opened her eyes again and noticed it was Thomas, looking at her in a curious way “Hey you.”

She looked at him and froze. The man in front of her was gorgeous. She was used to see him in his everyday uniform or the fire gear, and his hair tied and under an helmet. She almost did not recognise him. He had his dress mess uniform on, and his hair was free and she discovered it reached his shoulders. 

“I almost did not recognise you there.”

He grinned “I know, without soot and dirt on me it must be a challenge.”

She smiled back at him.

“How is your night going?” He asked, moving closer to her.

“Counting the minutes until Dorian tells me it’s okay to go home.”

She shuffled in her position and he placed a hand on her back “you should sit down.”

“Does this place have a balcony?”

Thomas grinned “Follow me, m’lady.”

“Did you meet the mayor?” She asked as they started walking.

“I did.”

“And?”

“He gave me his business card and told me to tell me if there was anything we needed.” He made his way through the crowd.

“Me too. I am going to email him and ask a bucket load of expensive equipment.”

“I have my wish-list ready.” Thomas commented smiling wickedly.

They arrived at the balcony and once there Aelin leaned heavily against the wall.

“Are you okay?” Suddenly Aelin noticed their proximity. Thomas was right in front of her.

“I am fine.”

“Want something to drink?”

“Please. Wine if they have it.”

He smiled and she noticed his dimples appear “I’ll be right back.” And she felt her face flush hot.

What was happening to her? Why all of a sudden she was attracted to him?

She saw Lys walking by and waved at her.

“What are doing here?”

“Hiding.” She said hurriedly “I have a problem.”

“What did you do?”

“I want to do something stupid.”

“As in?”

“Thomas.” She explained.

Lysandra looked at her friend with a puzzled face.

“As in he is the one one I want to … do”

“Holy fuck,” she exclaimed almost spilling all her wine on her uniform.

“How?”

Aelin looked up “I don’t know. He was here, he was nice, he smiled and I just… have you seen him tonight?”

“No I was with Aedion and the guys.”

“I don’t know what to do.”

“Don’t do… anything.” Then she moved away “he is coming back.”

Thomas came back with the drinks and placed them on the ledge beside them.

She had known and worked with the other captain for a very long time. They had gone through the academy together. And never, not once she had ever felt a smidge of attraction for him.

He leaned against the wall just beside her, shoulders brushing gently “is your team ready for the performance review?”

Aelin nodded “Yes, Aedion and I are going through as many different scenarios as possible. They are ready. But I hate that I will have to stare from the sidelines.” She told him “How did yours go?”

Thomas drank some wine “We had a few bad moments. My newbie fucked up a couple of things and threw the whole team off track for a moment but they did recover splendidly. Manon was the best in our individual challenge.”

“Ohh I like her. Can I please get her and Asterin for my new engine?”

“We’ll see.” The man gave her a wide smile that made his dimples come back.

She pinched his side and he grabbed her hands to block her. She stopped and stared at him for a moment and then they both moved at the same time. Their lips met and he pushed her against the wall and she left her crutches fall on the ground. His hand behind her back to hold her up. The kiss deepened and Aelin opened for him and a small moan escaped her.

“Oh shit.” Said a voice at her side and Aelin recognised Lysandra and Aedion at her side.

She and Thomas broke apart quickly. Thomas coughed embarrassed, looked at Aelin and excused himself.

“What the fuck was that?”

Aelin’s hand went to her mouth, her lips still swollen by the kiss.

Aedion kneeled to pick up her crutches and passed them to her.

In that instant the rest of the team arrived.

“Why is everyone out here? It’s cold.”

“Aedion and I just discovered Aelin making out with Thomas.”

“Do you mean captain Hamilton?” Asked Brullo.

“I thought you liked the silver haired fox.” Added Ansel.

“Are you and Thomas a thing now?” This time it was Ren.

“I don’t know okay?” Aelin shouted, frustration rising “It happened.”

“You… happened to trip on his lips?” Nox gave her a smug smile and Aelin would have stormed out if she hadn’t been on crutches.

Aelin placed the glass back on the ledge and started to walk away. Lysandra caught up with her “I am sorry. It just came out.”

“Lys, I don’t care.”

The woman grabbed her arm “Aelin, please…”

“What? I don’t know what I was doing okay? We kissed. And I don’t understand my feelings anymore.” She leaned against the wall, her knee throbbing with pain “I haven’t known my feelings since Sam died.” She sniffled “I work. I throw myself into work because that it’s when I do not think that he is gone from my life.” She closed her eyes and tried to put all her pain back “it just felt nice for a moment to have that again. And I know I am sounding like a pathetic mess… I don’t know why I did it.” Aelin sobbed “I am so tired of hurting.” A tear appeared at the corner of her eyes “you have Aedion. I don’t have anyone.”

Lysandra hugged her friend “I am so sorry.”

Aelin leaned into her friend “we are fine.” She pulled back “but I am going home. I am in a ton of pain and I really want to lie down.”

“I’ll tell Dorian if he starts looking for you.”

“We are off tomorrow. Fancy a girls day? We can invite Elide and Ansel.”

“Yeah. Yeah, please.”

“Good,” Lys patted her shoulder “now go home and relax.”

She was outside ready to call a taxi when she heard a voice calling her. She turned and saw Thomas running to her.

“Aelin,” he stopped in front of her “I am sorry. I have no idea what got into me. I was there and all of a sudden I wanted to kiss you.”

She turned to him and moved closer enough to kiss him. His hand slipped to her waist and pulled her closer. She melted in his arms and felt his hand caressing her back.

“I was going home.” She said against his lips.

“I can’t let you piss off Havilliard on your own.”

She kissed him again and then detached so he could call a taxi.

Their ride home arrived not long after and the journey to Aelin’s flat was not too long. 

They made it to her flat and he lifted her in his arms and walked to the bedroom. He dropped her on the bed and leaned on top of her and kissed her deeply, his hands trailing on the sides of her body and Aelin leaned into the touch. Her hand trailed up to his face and then fisted into his golden hair and pulled him down for another kiss. Maybe it was a mistake but she could not care.

Slowly he started to unbutton her shirt and Aelin did the same for him and not long after they were both naked and Aelin stared at his body and realised the man was so incredibly well built. 

“You will have to lead the dances, captain.” He lowered himself again over her and kissed her in a way that made her forget all the pain and hurt.

It was later, after their adventure in bed. 

Aelin smiled at him satisfied. The man had skills and for a while he made her forget the real reason why that night she had searched for comfort in him.

They were now sitting in bed, their back against the headboard and the blanket covering them up.

“Did we just mess up our friendship?” He asked turning to her “I am not complaining I just…”

She sighed at his side “I think we did it for the wrong reasons.”

He agreed “Epically awesome rebound sex?”

Aelin nodded and Thomas turned to her “you are stunning though, and if the captain can’t see it, well, it’s his loss.”

“You are a sweet man” and she caressed his face “and your ex is a bitch.” She grabbed his arm and pulled him down, “fancy watching stupid movies? We can also order in. There’s a place round the corner that stays open till late. I had no food at that stupid party.”

“I’ll get the beers.” He said getting off the bed and putting his briefs back on. 

Aelin grabbed a discarded t-shirt “I’ll order the food.”

He came back with the beers and offered one to her “to our own party.”

They clinked the bottles and went to camp on the sofa.

TAGs: 

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@swankii-art-teacher​

@courtofjurdan

[wesimpforxiao]

Inception: Chapter 3

You were busy humming away and cleaning the dishes when Childe eyed your bed again.  He couldn't shake the feeling that this was where you'd hide evidence if there was any to begin with.  He glanced in your direction and shifted off of the couch, careful not to make the couch squeak from his movements.

No sooner did he crouch at your bedside that he could see the glint of something with a distinct shade of red.  He pulled what looked to be a large laundry bag out from under the bed, his hand rummaging around to find one of the domestic Fatui masks that only covered the eyes.  

From the looks of it, these are all the stolen masks, he scanned beneath the bed once more, but found nothing but dust bunnies.  So Zhongli was right about you.  What have you been up to, girlie?  The sound of the facet turning off warned Childe that it would be seconds before you turn around and see what he was doing.  

"You've been awfully quiet over there, Aj-" You spun on your heel and noticed him kneeling at your bed with widening eyes.  "-Hey, what're you doing?!"

Childe doesn't do deception--well, besides lying to you and Teucer, that is.  Then there was the time with Aether...Okay, maybe he does a bit of deception, but...He kept his ground and didn't answer.

Panicked, you ran over to him.  "Whatever you're doing, put it back! You don't go snooping around for ladies' panties when they invite you over, do you?!"  You came to a halt when you saw him holding one of your prizes, expecting him to do something, anything than what he did next.

Childe peered over with a sly grin and lifted the mask high in the air for you to see.  "What's this, Reed? Don't tell me this is for some sort of roleplay...?"

"Eh?!"  He watched you turn beet red in a heartbeat with amusement--and suspicion.  "N-No! Not at all!"

The ball was in his court now, and he spiked it back.  "What's wrong ojou-chan?  I was only asking if you do it for performances like the opera.  Don't tell me you were thinking something dirty-"

"Shut it! Shut up!" You reached for the mask, but the man got to his feet and towered over you so you couldn't grab it.  "Give it back and stop going through my stuff! That's not the definition of 'make yourself at home,' you know!"

"So, what do you use these for?" A slight tilt of the head gestured to the bag of masks on the floor.  "They're Fatui masks.  Are you the one responsible for their disappearances after all?"

"Give me that-" You grabbed his forearm and heated the skin enough to make him lose his grip from surprise, but not enough to burn him.  Satisfied with regaining your prize, you shoved it back into the bag with a huff and kicked the whole thing back under the bed, ignoring the pain in your toe from hitting it too hard.  "Mind your own business."

"As much as I'd like to," Childe followed you back into the kitchen area while your mind was set on drying the dishes, "you've peaked my curiosity.  What're they for?"

"If you weren't snooping, I would've eventually told you," you grabbed one of the plates and a towel that sat to your left.  "But since you decided to peek I think its within my right not to tell you anything."

"Oh-ho?" Hot breath brushed past the top of your ear and his chest pressed against your back so you were practically cornered against the counter.  "Then I guess it's within my right to believe whatever I want about you then? No matter how obscene or dirty?"

"Quit playing games with me, Ajax!"  He could see how red your ears were, and your flustered state was more than apparent since heat was practically radiating off your back.  It seems he's learned something new about you; your pyro vision amplifies your flustered reactions...this information should be useful in determining any lies you might come up with.  "And back up, will you?  I c-can't move--"

"Tell me then," he teased.

"Ugh, I don't remember you being this annoying."  He heard you let out an agitated sigh before you slammed your towel down on the counter and replaced the dishes back to their normal spots in a cupboard.  "Can you keep a secret?"

Delighted to hear your cooperation, Childe nodded and allowed you to move freely again.  "I know a thing or two in keeping secrets."

"I suppose it couldn't hurt to tell you...but what I tell you stays between you and me.  And you can't tell the Millelith--"

"I swear it."

"Okay, good.  You already know how much I hate the Fatui," you took the liberty to throw yourself onto the couch and roll over so there was enough space for him to sit next to you.  "I may or may not be getting some much-needed revenge on them for all the crap they've done."

"Oh?  How so?"

"Let's just say I play some pranks on them."  Childe scrunched his nose up as he discerned what exactly you meant by that.  "Oh, don't bring up that missing Fatui stuff with me.  I've only heard about it from you; my involvement with the Fatui usually ends in them getting bruises or occasionally a broke bone."

"You've said you don't like to fight, but you sound like quite the troublemaker."

"I only fight if absolutely necessary.  Sooner or later the harbinger that tried to drown us all will turn up again, and when he does, he won't be excluded from my list."

"You have a list?"  The awkward laugh that left him sounded more nervous than intended.

"Er...not really.  Anyone that's Fatui is my target.  There's not a single good person in that organization."

"Is that so?"  Childe turned to your fireplace and thought to himself.  For a brief moment the friendly façade he put on faltered to reveal lifeless eyes.  But just as quickly as the mask cracked, it melded back together to form a smile.  "You may be right about that, ojou-chan!"

.........................

It appears she truly has no involvement with the missing persons reports, Childe reviewed all the information he gathered on you as he left your apartment and entered the bustling nightlife of Liyue's streets.  He had no intention of reprimanding you for your attacks against his men; you posed as little of a threat as a fly.  Of course, that determination of your abilities didn't stop him from wanting to spar with you; you may have a chance to surprise him, especially if you were fated to discover his real identity...Was it bad that the idea of you finding out excited him?  To face you head-on while you're in a fit of rage--that would be oh-so thrilling.

Oh!  For a split second he glanced back at your distant apartment window.  'Fire isn't something I want to play with.'  And she even neglected to summon a flame...The attacked don't even have a burn on them.  It was true that those wielding the same element would have a certain resistance to injuries made by that element, but to not have a single blister on them?  Either you were incredibly weak, or you've never used it on the agents.

To rely on your own physical strength in a world of elemental beings...you're a brave one aren't you, Reed?  Perhaps after all these years apart there was some part of you like him--one that was fearless against foes, one that charges into battle rather than run from it.  You were cautious--a trait he did not possess--and smart, too.  Whatever role you play now is sure to be an interesting one regardless of the outcome.

As for that small part of you that's like him...well, he'll have to drag it out.

"Master Childe!"  The harbinger visibly tensed and whipped his head in the direction of your apartment to ensure he was far away enough not to be seen by you.  "Sir!"

"Shh!"  A harsh glare shut the agent up, but realizing his actions, Childe played it off with a laugh.  "Aha...apologies!  Why don't we walk--"  He guided the agent away from your window's view.

"Master Childe," the man spoke in a hushed tone that made it obvious the shushing had intimidated him, "we seem to be having trouble contacting another one of our agents..."

Childe's face fell.  "It's late.  Are you sure it's not possible they're attending a dinner party, or perhaps an opera?"

"No, no.  We've been trying to get in touch with him all day, but he never answered his door.  He never asked for leave, either--"

"--Give me the address."

The housing setup for the Fatui in the Liyue Division was quite similar to that of Mond's--that is, agents were located in a single hotel during their deployment.  These living quarters overlooked most of the city and were located on the opposite side of town from your apartment.  It was quite the walk, so you often ended up hiding in the funeral parlor while furious agents scoured the streets in search of the vigilante during the early morning hours.  Perhaps an even greater advantage is that the hotel and the Northland Bank were about ten minutes apart from one another, giving you just enough time to escape the chaos before the agents could call for reinforcements.

Childe entered the missing agent's room alone.  He had sent the messenger back to wherever he came from; working alone would be much less distracting.  The room was dark and the only light source came from the open window to the right.  He didn't miss a beat to light the nearest candle and explore the room more.  

The place was neat--too neat for a bachelor agent in his twenties.  Everything was in its rightful spot, from the books strewn about to the weapons displayed along the walls.  Even the clothes were neatly folded in their drawers and the uniforms neatly hung in the closet.  On a second look, this was an abnormality.

You see, agents are given three of each uniform component to ensure consistency in case something were to happen to the clothing in battle.  To put it simply there were three coats, three pairs of gloves, three pairs of shirts and trousers alike, three pairs of boots, and three masks.  Each one was resting in the closet.

So he abandons his post without informing his lead officer, leaves his uniforms...Childe returned to the dresser and yanked the drawers out once more.  Everything that should be there, was.  And the clothes hamper next to the dresser was empty.  "He left with the clothes on his back?"  No, it's too soon to draw conclusions.  Still...this is how every missing agent would disappear.  No dirty dishes, untouched clothes, and their uniforms neatly put away.  It wouldn't raise any red flags if this hadn't happened before.

Childe scanned the room for the last time before he pinched the candle nub.  Every agent that disappears does so without a trace or clue of where they could've went.  Perhaps they're taken at night, after their shifts end or when they're enjoying Liyue's nightlife?  Reed couldn't have done this.  It's too elaborate even for her antics.  This is the work of something big...but what?

As he walked back to his apartment, he was unable to come up with the answers.

.........

"What festival is this again?"  Childe was glued to your side as the two of you strolled through the main street of the city.  It was lit up with lanterns that cast a warm glow upon his red hair.  Despite both of your busy schedules, your childhood friend still had the audacity to ask you to show him around the festivities since he had only recently moved his work to Liyue.  You were a bit reluctant at first, but this would be a great opportunity to get closer to him since your previous meetings were short.  And with the streets crowded with tourists and locals, it made Childe all the more difficult to be spotted by his subordinates.

"It's called the Lantern Rite," you answer with your gaze preoccupied by the fires lit beneath the stoves of the local restaurants.  "It's meant to celebrate the lives and sacrifices of the adepti."

"I see.  This is certainly different than Snezhnaya, isn't it?"

"Uh-huh."

Childe's eyes flicked down to you.  Why were you so disinterested?  Was he boring you? Or perhaps you weren't into festivities anymore?  His nose crinkled as he thought, then his nostrils picked up on a delicious aroma.  Seafood!  "How about I buy us something to eat?"

"Hm?  Like what?"  Your question was answered once you followed his stare, and your heart dropped.  The stall he was eyeing just happened to be next to some sort of stunt show.  That's new, you grumbled inwardly as you watched visionless people spin fire without a smidge of hesitation in their movements.  Since when were their performers during the Lantern Rite?

"How about something reminiscent of our homeland? I've been feeling a bit homesick these past few weeks."  He stepped forward, but your feet were planted firmly on the ground.  "Reed?"  

"...I'll wait here.  Go ahead."

The harbinger's shoulders slouched in disappointment.  Maybe you weren't in the mood to hang out with him after all.  Still, he wasn't the kind of guy to be dissuaded so easily; he picked himself back up and walked over to the vendor.  While he waited to be served, Childe admired the street performers that danced in the middle of the walkway.  They didn't have visions, yet they exuded themselves with such poise that most vision wielders lacked.  Their elegance inspired him, and he had a difficult time refraining from joining in.

The look of pure awe didn't go unnoticed by you, where you now stood in the shadows as far from the performers as possible.  He was definitely enjoying the show--a little more than you'd like.  Your gaze returned to the poi and staffs that were lit ablaze and twirling through the air.  And just like Childe's look of awe was noticed, your cynic stare was noticed by him as well when he was back with food.  

You hadn't even realized he returned.

"Your crab roe tofu, ojou-chan," he held the tray out for you to take.

"...thanks..."

A second glance to the fire wielders, and Childe confirmed his suspicions.  "Well this is certainly a surprise."  His chuckle yanked you back to the present.  "Ironic, too."  You snatched the tray away without saying anything and stuffed tofu into your mouth.  "What's a girl with pyrophobia doing with a pyro vision?  That seems a bit cruel even for the God of War and Flame."

"I-I'm not afraid of it."  Your skin flushed a faint pink at the words while you glared at him.

"You're not?  Then please explain why your stove and furnace have never been touched.  If you ask me, it's pretty obvious."  Your silence caught him off guard.  You always bantered back, but this time you couldn't even look in his direction.  

It was difficult to blink the tears away as the memory of a burning house flashed through your mind--the thick smoke that coated your lungs, the sticky heat that threatened to burn you alive, the screams of your mother...And when Ajax disappeared the next day too, only for you to think the Fatui had got him too--Or the memory of his return, and when you tell him the news of your father he didn't even care.

Does he even remember his response?

You weren't hungry anymore.  "I have a better way to spend the night.  How about we spar?"

[wolpertinger-prince]

Tagged by @queenevac

Who are my top 5 comfort characters?

I mean, they interchange depending on my current hyperfixation, but...

1) Ratchet (Transformers, particularly Bayverse): I love the grumpy old medibot that’s allowed to be Not Nice while still clearly being a good guy. But I love him in Bayverse the most for how while that could still be present, it’s not the main focus of his character; he’s implied to be a lot more kindly or at least polite than other incarnations. Sure, the actual films don’t really go into his character much, but I’ve fallen in love with what we’ve got of him nonetheless. Just this worn-torn and tired old man mech that remains kind in spite of everything, values life, and makes the most out of his new home on Earth by enjoying its beauty. And also he’s handsome. I mean that unironically. Not only is he physically handsome, but god his voice...

2) Gordon (Catscratch): Gordon has been with me since I was probably 9 years old. I always adored him for his courage, his sense of justice, and his kindness. Also, much like him, I love to eat. I kinda connected to him since I saw the promos for the show before the first episode debuted. So much so that getting inside the house and down the basement on time to catch the premiere was an event for me. But anyway, of all the hyperfixations on cartoons I had as a kid, Catscratch is the one that stuck with me. Probably because it came out during a weird time in my life, when I kinda started to notice that I wasn’t like my peers. So, during that confusing time, I had Gordon; I’ll always cherish him for that.

3) Stranger (Oddworld: Stranger’s Wrath): Stranger is me. From his being sort of socially inept despite his intimidating demeanor to his isolation to the fact that he’s constantly disguising himself both for his own safety and because he doesn’t think he deserves to present as what he really is to him being mostly self-serving... Yep. Stranger is me. His story resonates with me the way so few main characters in any media do. Like yeah, I relate to Abe from the same franchise, too, but Stranger is like Oddworld Inhabitants made an allegory for my life, made it into a video game, and made me a cool cowboy centaur creature. But the question remains: do I relate to Stranger’s journey of self-acceptance as an autistic person, as an nonbinary person, or as a person that’s both aspec and arospec? The answer is yes.

4) Cookie (Rayman: The Animated Series): Cookie is both me and what I wish I could allow myself to be. Simply put: Cookie sucks. He’s cranky, complains constantly, and is full of anxiety that holds him back from truly embracing his freedom after escaping captivity at the circus. It’s not that he sucks: it’s that he’s allowed to suck. And that sounds like a weird reason to like a character, especially since that’s the exact reason why many other people that have viewed this obscure little cartoon find him really annoying. However, as an autistic person that didn’t get diagnosed until later in life and therefore feels the need to mask constantly, it’s kind of important for me to see that and analyze what it means to me. Cookie isn’t adventurous like the rest of the main crew are, and that’s something he and the others have to deal with. His friends may get upset with him for his constant complaining, but he still says what’s on his mind and allows himself to feel, all while still clearly being a competent adult with a skillset that his friends are heavily reliant on.

5) Hunch (Rock-A-Doodle): Possibly being an even stranger choice for a comfort character than Cookie, Hunch came at a point in my life where I knew I was probably mentally ill, but didn’t bother bringing it up with my parents because I knew they weren’t going to do anything about it. I was about to turn 15 when curiosity got the better of me one quiet morning and made me sit through Rock-A-Doodle in like 15 parts on YouTube (yes, really). I had watched the Nostalgia Critic review of it, but the critic never mentioned this manic little dude. So I got attached to him right away because it was like I discovered him myself. And I’m not sure if I liked him at the time because he made for a good projection of my own anxiety, depression, and god knows what else, or just because he was a funny little owl that sucked at being evil. Either way, he’s the reason why I have a soft spot for obscure-ish, non-threatening evil henchmen today, like the weasel guardsmen from Conker’s Bad Fur Day or Killer from All Dogs Go to Heaven. Either of those characters could be in this same spot, but something about Hunch’s cackling, manic nature puts him above the rest for me. Or it could be the fact that he suffers abuse at the hands of a family member that he spends the duration of the film trying to impress, and then at the end gets to chase that same abusive family member away into the sunrise and presumably eats him. Aaaah, karma.

Tagging: @tragischehagelslag @kid-mera @the-little-animals @x-de-con-struct-ed-x @groovy-rat-man

[onlysarah235678]

A Little Bit Part 8

Pairing: Billie Dean Howard x female reader

A/N: So here is a break from the death. Just a little dog fluff, annoying people, and flowers and lube as promised.  Thanks for reading 😊. Also special thank you to illuminated-blue for helping me figure out what gifs I wanted and then making them for me again (and for listening to me rant today). You’re the best ❤

Warnings: annoying people, brief mention of blood/wound cleaning, and slight dog aggression/distress. 

The next day at work you feel like you’re floating you’re so happy. Everything is going well so far with appointments, and you’ve seen at least three happy, healthy puppies today. Not even the reporter waiting for you outside your building this morning could bring your mood down. You and Milo had just waltzed right by them to your car because you were determined to make it through this day unscathed. At least up until you went to Billie’s house.

The two of you had decided that you should come over because then Billie wouldn’t have to worry about the cats being left with the sitter. You felt bad for Heather who always seemed to be watching them, and Billie most likely wouldn’t be able to see you until after dinner time. The teen probably had better things to do than watch kittens all night. Even though they were adorable.

Speaking of cats, you look to your schedule and see that it’s changed a little. You take a minute to review the new client’s information before running up to your desk to finish up some notes while you had the chance. They should be here soon if they were in fact on time.

Claire smiles as she arrives at the clinic with her cat. She shuts the door behind her after grabbing the meowing cat in the back seat. She had specifically taken the day off so she could get her cat’s vaccines updated. Fridays were ideal because they were usually the busiest at the pet store. That’s why she’d picked today. She didn’t want to work. She also had wanted to make sure you’d be here, and that she could schedule an appointment with you. That was the real reason why Claire had taken today off of work.

She hadn’t seen you since running into you and Milo at that bar and that was too long for her liking. That meeting hadn’t gone the way she’d wanted so she was going to try again. She also had never gotten the chance to see you in your element, and she was way too excited for this opportunity today.

As Claire walked in through the front door, she immediately looked around for you, but came up empty. She turned to the blonde at the front desk with a half-smile.

“Hi, I’m here with Jonesy. I have an appointment with Dr. Y/L/N.”

You had never bothered to learn Claire’s last name. However, after being harassed by the brunette numerous times, you’d think that you’d want to have that sort of information. Unfortunately, you realize your mistake too late, and you walk into the exam room with Claire and her cat only to be completely blindsided. Dammit.

You barely hold back the urge to groan as you allow your professional persona to take over. You stomp down your personal feelings toward the brunette for probably the umpteenth time since you’d met her.

“Hi, Claire. Good to see you.”

For fuck’s sake. You had to stop saying that to her.

The exam went pretty well. Claire’s cat was a little shit for some of it, but he wasn’t the worst you’ve had to deal with. You’re at the point where you just need to get samples on him, but you have a feeling that you’ll need a little help. At the end of the exam, Jonesy got a little feisty and not too keen with being poked. For this reason, you asked the assistant helping you, Maria to go get another person to lend a hand, but Claire spoke up before she could leave. They exchange an uncomfortable look before you manage to cut the tension by smiling and effectively shutting Claire down.

“Don’t think you can handle little old Jonesy, Dr. Y/L/N?”

Maria’s jaw drops and you remind yourself to be a professional as you just laugh slightly instead of rolling your eyes.

“Not at all. I just want to make sure that no one gets hurt and that Jonesy is as least stressed as possible.”

Jonesy was very stressed. He hadn’t wanted any of the baby food that was offered and it took two holders wrapping him in a towel to keep him still. You pulled his blood easily enough, despite him having old cat veins that were practically non-existent, but there was no way in hell you were going to be able to get pee on him with how he was squirming.

As you did your job, you pretended not to notice Claire’s eyes on you. It was unsettling to say the least, but you weren’t going to call her out on it and let your assistants know that you’re tense. Well, you were all tense because Jonesy was getting pissed off.

You finish up quickly and pull out the needle from Jonesy’s leg, but you have to hold it for a moment to make sure his blood clots. That’s when he claws you with the nails you hadn’t gotten around to trimming yet. Maria had lifted her hand off of his leg like she was supposed to, and Jonesy took that opportunity to claw the shit out of your hand.

“Oww, okay! Let. Go.”

You pull Jonesy’s nail out of the back of your hand as carefully as possible before dropping his foot back onto the table. You used the towel wrapped around him to wipe up the blood that was already pooling before you go to grab the nail trimmers.

“Are you okay?”

You nod before grabbing the first paw with dagger-like nails. Jonesy of course hates it, but you finish quickly enough and manage to get out of there before Claire says anything too inappropriate. First thing you do is go to treatment and grab some gauze and disinfectant to put on your cut. It was still bleeding and you hiss in pain as you scrub it clean. This one is going to hurt like a bitch for a while.

Once done you wave your hand to dry it off before returning to pharmacy. You are about to start writing up Jonesy’s note when Maria comes out of the room you’d just been in with an uncertain look.

“Dr. Y/L/N.  She has another question for you.”

You hold in your sigh before you nod and head back into the exam room. Hopefully this goes quickly.

Billie Dean was on lunch when you texted her about Claire. She had been working non-stop since she arrived to the studio at 6 this morning. She was ready for a break long enough to finish a cigarette because she was long overdue for one. She was grateful that Michelle had gotten her lunch and had it waiting for her once she finished her most recent episode. She only had one left to get to, and she was excited to be done. Even though it would definitely take the rest of the day.

After re-recording was done for the season, she was going back on television and radio to promote it. The thought made Billie exhausted, but she had to admit it would be nice to leave this studio for the next one. She had a television interview scheduled for next week, and she had already decided to talk to you about it beforehand.

There was no doubt in Billie Dean’s mind that the interviewer would ask her about her relationship with Y/N. She couldn’t just sit there and dodge it, well she could, but it would be too obvious. She needed to figure out where you both stood with your relationship. It was something she’d have to mention tonight when you came over.

Billie had to stop herself from smiling at the thought of what tonight would bring. You had agreed to come over, and you had even offered to cook. Billie wasn’t very good in the kitchen despite learning a couple of your favorite dishes, but she knew how much you loved cooking. You had practically begged her to let you make her dinner, and of course she’d said yes. How could she have said no to that?

She was eager to see what you made and was certain that the image of you cooking in her kitchen would be enough to get her through the rest of the day.

Billie sighed as she put out her cigarette before grabbing her phone out of her purse. She ignored the emails and immediately looked to your messages. Her brow furrowed in confusion as she reread the texts a couple of times.

Even after doing that, she still had no idea what you were talking about.

You were angrily texting Billie in your office when Erin came upstairs to give you your stethoscope.  You’d left it downstairs in your hurry to go vent to Billie and you hadn’t even realized it. You didn’t hear her because you were muttering darkly under your breath, and you nearly fell out of your chair when she spoke up.

“Damn, annoying persistent little--.”

“Uh…Dr. Y/L/N?”

Your feet hit the ground fast as you spun around in your chair to see Erin standing in your doorway with your stethoscope in hand. You smile before laughing awkwardly and reaching out for it. You see Erin look to your phone before shooting you a concerned look.

“Oh, thank you!”

“Everything okay, doc?”

You nod despite the fact that you’re lying. You are annoyed at Claire for reasons you can’t really work out, but it’s enough to tick you off. You were having such a good day, and then she had to come in here and trap you in a room with her. She didn’t really have any questions for you, at least ones related to Jonesy. You try not to think about those same annoying questions before you shrug and decide to tell a little bit of the truth.

“Yeah, I just saw a client who I’ve had not so fun encounters with before.”

This piques Erin’s curiosity and she can’t help but ask who you just saw. You mention her name and how she works at a pet store you go to, and Erin practically jumps at this.

“Wait, is she brunette and kind of lanky?”

You open your mouth to reply, but don’t want to be unnecessarily mean so you just shrug noncommittally.

“Possibly?”

Erin groans as she moves a little closer so she can whisper and not be overheard. You are a little surprised by what the brunette says but you figure you shouldn’t be. She has pets too after all, and she is the one who told you about the store in the first place.

“Oh my god. She is the worst. She’s always there when I go get something for Dex and she-.”

Erin trails off as she looks to you uncertainly before deciding that you should probably know. She was really hoping that what she had to tell you didn’t surprise you. If you were annoyed with her it was very likely that you were well aware of Claire’s creepy tendencies.

“She always asks about you, but I promise I don’t tell her anything!”

Despite the chill you feel travel up your spine at the thought of Claire being that creepy, you smile at Erin. You’re grateful that she can tell when someone’s being a creep, and that she’s smart enough to not give them anything they could use against her. It’s also nice to know that she has your back when it matters.

“Thank you for that. She’s always just a little too pushy.”

Erin frowns a this before nodding to herself and you. She decides that she was going to have to run interference if this Claire showed up again. She leaves you alone after that to go back to work, and you almost forgot that you’d texted Billie when your phone beeps. You jump slightly in surprise before looking to what she wrote.

Who is it that’s bothering you? One of your coworkers?

You look back to the messages you sent to her as if you’d forgotten and cringe at how you let Claire rile you up this much.

This bitch won’t leave me alone.

Her cat’s a little shit too.

Okay, so maybe this had been a little unnecessary. Sure Claire was kind of a bitch and annoying, but you probably shouldn’t have said this. She just wouldn’t leave you alone no matter what you did, and now she was showing up at your work? Next thing you knew she’d be showing up at your damn front door.

The part about her cat was true though. He was a little shit.

You type a response before returning to your records. You write up the last details for Claire’s cat, you’d been waiting until everything else was done before doing that, before heading downstairs. It’s almost 1:30, so you only have about half an hour until your next appointment. You take the steps two at a time going down on your way to the kennels. You see Milo sleeping and smile as he jumps up at the sound of the door opening.

“Hey, Milo. Want to go out?”

He nearly knocks you over in his excitement to get out. You curse before grabbing onto Milo’s harness to lead him outside. As soon as you reach the yard and make sure it is empty, you release Milo and watch him run away. He pees here and there before coming back to jump on the bench that you were sitting on. You sighed before standing up and grabbing a frisbee and holding it up with a smile.

“Ready?”

Milo runs after the frisbee until he’s exhausted and panting ten minutes later. He’s lying in the grass with the frisbee near his mouth because he still had to hold onto it so you wouldn’t take it from him. You walk over to him because you figure he needs to go inside for some water, but Milo grabs the frisbee when he sees you coming. He runs away despite still panting and you sigh as you watch your dog run around with his frisbee. You decide it’s a lost cause and leave him to play with it for a minute as you run inside really quickly to grab something.

You nearly run into Erin on your way inside, but you stop just in time before shooting her an apologetic look.

“Sorry, Erin.”

She waves you off before glancing outside. “Milo out there?”

You just nod and she asks if she can take the twins out there. The ‘twins’ are two golden retrievers that are boarding for about a month while their home is under construction. They’re super sweet like most goldens and Milo loves them. You smile before nodding and continuing on your way into the clinic. You don’t make it very far before you’re stopped again.

“Dr. Y/L/N!”

You turn at the sound of someone calling your name. One of the receptionists is holding a large arrangement of flowers that almost completely hides their face. You smile about to ask who they were for before she hands them to you.

“For you. Do you want me to put them in your office?”

You shoot her a confused look and it takes you a second to respond. You eventually shake you head before reaching out to take them from her. You thank her before watching as she heads back up front before you look to the flowers again.

They’re beautiful and bright and they smell wonderful. The arrangement is a mix of roses, lilies and a couple other flowers you didn’t know the name of. You were halfway up the stairs before you attempted to look for a card. It was hidden and you couldn’t pull it from the flowers easily. You set the vase down on your desk before freeing the card from the petals and flipping it over to read what was written.

Can’t wait to see you tonight.

Billie Dean.

You smile at the note before tucking it away somewhere safe. You were touched that Billie would surprise you like this and you couldn’t wait for tonight either.

It was going to be different from any of your previous dates. You were going to cook because you had been wanting to since you found out how much take-out Billie ate, and it was going to be at her house so you could see the kittens. You were only a little nervous about going over to Billie’s house again, but you were determined not to make it a big deal.

It had only been a few weeks since you met, but you hadn’t felt like how you did with Billie, with anyone else. Certainly not with your horrible exes. Billie Dean made you feel comfortable in a way that no one else ever had. She was different. Obviously because she was a medium, but honestly that wasn’t the difference that mattered to you. You hadn’t been lucky enough to be with someone that was as considerate and understanding as Billie. She never faulted you for your awkward and depressing past, and she was busier than you were so the sporadic texts and the even more sporadic dates didn’t upset her like you feared it would.

You’re pulled from your thoughts by the sound of yet someone else calling your name. This time however it was more frantic than you were expecting and you hurried out of your office. You’re met at the stairs by a slightly panicked Lindsey who must have been on lunch because she still had half of it in her hand.

“What’s is it? Is something wrong?”

Lindsey just hurries back down the stairs and opens the door to treatment. You follow her without question as she nods and fills you in on what’s going on.

“Milo was playing with the twins and he got stuck in the fence chasing the frisbee.”

You have to hold in your groan of disbelief because of course your overzealous and slightly impulsive dog would do this. You just mutter an okay under your breath before heading back out into the yard where you see Erin and Mina standing beside your screaming dog. He’s thrashing and trying to pull himself out, but he’s pretty stuck and really must have been running full speed.

You run over to the trio to try and calm Milo down because it seems like he really is stuck. You crouch down next to him on his right before reaching out for the panicked shepherd.

“Hey! Milo, hey, hi. It’s me, you’re okay. Shh, it’s okay, buddy.”

You reach through the bars of fence to pet Milo’s head and he calms enough for you not to be worried about him injuring himself further. You look him over quickly and don’t see any blood immediately, but then you reach his head and you see some dripping from his nose. You sigh in frustration as you try to figure out what the best thing to do is.

“Could you run inside and get a couple of towels and some lube?”

You figure that’s the best thing to get him out of this jam and you watch as both Erin and Mina leave, the latter leading the twins inside so they don’t get in the way. You turn back to your dog who is still panting in either exertion or stress, you’re not sure, and you do your best to keep him calm while you wait for your supplies.

“It’s okay Milo. You’re alright. We’re going to get you out, okay?”

Milo just whines before he turns to lick your hand that had been scratching his neck. You realize that you should probably take off his harness if you hope to slide him back through the fence, but you only get it halfway off before it becomes stuck.

“Dammit.”

Erin returns first and she stands back a little not sure if you want help before she speaks up.

“Anything I can do?”

You nod before motioning for the brunette to come closer so you can show her what you’re trying to do. If you pull on his harness while Erin pushes him away from the fence post a bit you might be able to get it off. You explain this and Erin just nods before moving to put her hands on Milo.

“Sorry buddy.”

It works but Milo yelps as you do it, so you decide to leave the other side be. Maybe you can slide him forward enough on the other side and figure it out from there. He was trapped from just behind his shoulders with most of his body still inside the yard, so maybe you could just pull him back in. When Mina arrives with the towels and what looks like all of the lube in the hospital, you relay the plan and put on the gloves that Mina luckily had the foresight to bring.

“Okay, Milo. We’re going to put this on you and try to slide you out alright?”

You know that he’s not going to respond or even really comprehend what you’re saying, but you know that hearing your voice will calm him down. He’s always been anxious when having things done to him and this was going to be worse due to the fact that he’s already highly stressed before anything has even begun.

You start to rub some of the lube on his right shoulder through the fence while Mina and Erin take his left side. Milo turns as they talk to him too, but is unable to see and growls as they touch him.

“Hey, Milo, stop that. They’re just trying to help you, okay?”

You try to keep going, you even move one of your hands to his left side but it doesn’t help. Milo just gets antsier and he’s growling louder before you realize it’s not working. You can’t be mad at him for being scared. He doesn’t know what’s going on and he can’t see them so he’s distrustful.

You make the decision to switch sides with them so he can see them and just hear you on his blind side. You berate yourself for not doing this initially because Milo immediately calms down and his tail starts to wag as you scratch him between his shoulder blades.

“Good boy, Milo. Almost done okay?”

Now that Mio is sufficiently lubed, you try and slide him back through the bars. You manipulate one of his legs forward to try and slide him backwards but he’s still too wide. You instruct Erin and Mina to do the same and Milo’s legs are stretched out as far forward as they can go before you try again. You have to readjust as Erin moves to pull him from behind, and you breathe a sigh of relief as Milo finally slides back into the yard. You hold onto him as his head whips around to see who’s at his rear end, and you look at his nose carefully before taking his harness off completely. You try to wipe off some of the lube with the towels, but it’s no use. Milo’s too excited about being freed and he’s already shaking it everywhere anyway.

“Look at you Milo. You’re a mess, huh? You need a bath.”

He just licks your face and you groan in annoyance before thanking both of your helpers. You scratch your dog behind his ears for another few seconds before you stand up and motion for him to follow you.

“No more frisbee for a while, okay?”

It turns out that Milo’s a little sorer than anticipated and after his bath he yelps when you reach underneath him to pick him up. You try again more carefully before just letting him jump up on you. You regret this immediately once all 70+ lbs of him is in your arms, but you put him down quickly as he shakes all of the water off of him. You groan in disgust before covering him with a towel and attempting to dry him off.

He whines when you put him in the kennel with the blow dryer, but you have to get to your appointment. You’ll check on him afterwards, but for now you have to go see a dog about some skin issues.

“I’ll be back Milo. Be good.”

It’s 4 before you are able to take the time to examine Milo again. You are in between appointments when you pull him out of his kennel and bring him into treatment. You brush him out because he looks like a mess and as you’re doing that you notice he’s a little sensitive along his ribs. Not that you’re shocked. He’d forced himself through a damn hole he shouldn’t have been able to fit through.

You listened to him and didn’t find anything else wrong and decided to just give him a little something for the pain that would be worse tomorrow. Your next appointment arrives as you are finishing up with him but it’s taking you a minute to get Milo to take his pill. He’s always been horrible about taking medication.

“Dr. Y/L/N. Billy’s here.”

You’re a little confused by this and you turn to Erin with a frown. You’re currently holding open Milo’s mouth to try and shove this pill down his throat when you realize what she means. Billy. The cat with arthritis.

“Right okay, what’s going on with him?”

Billie Dean checks her phone again once she’s done with work. She hasn’t heard from you yet which makes her think you’re still working. It’s nearly 6:30 which is a little late for you, but she decides to just head home and get things ready.

Other than taking care of the kittens and making sure there were clean dishes for you two to use, she didn’t have much she could do. You had refused to tell her what you were cooking and had insisted on shopping yourself. Billie was already in the car when her phone rang. She answers it without looking to see who it is because she’s driving, but she doesn’t have to wonder long.

“Hello?”

“Hi! Billie I’m so sorry for not calling you sooner! Things got crazy here. Milo got stuck in a fence, a dog came in after getting hit by a car, but thank you so much! The flowers are beautiful!”

Billie chuckles under her breath at your flustered state, but then she registers everything that you said and she frowns in concern.

“I’m glad you liked them, Y/N. Did you say that Milo got stuck in a fence? Is he okay?”

You turned around to glance in the back seat briefly to see him fast asleep. He was exhausted from his exciting day and probably would sleep the rest of the night.

“Yeah, he was having too much fun with some friends and a frisbee and ended up halfway through an iron fence.”

Billie shakes her head at the image this conjures up and she sighs as she turns into her driveway.

“Aw poor baby.”

You laugh at this before pulling up to your apartment building. You still had to go shopping to get groceries, but you had to make sure that Milo was situated first. You weren’t sure how long you would be gone and were a little stressed by this, but you would figure it out.

“Yeah, he had a rough day.”

You both were silent as you turn off your cars and consider what to say next. You were trying to figure out how much time you needed to take care of Milo and shop before you could head over to Billie’s. Billie was trying to figure out things for Milo as well, but you hadn’t even considered what she suggested.

“How was your day?”

“Do you want to bring him?”

You both speak at the same time and it takes you a second to realize what she’s said. You shake your head as you turn around to see Milo still out cold. You hoped you wouldn’t have to carry him. Again.

“No, it’s okay. I’ll just get him set up here before heading to the store.”

Billie’s already out of her car by the time she responds. She doesn’t mind either way, but she has a feeling she knows what you want to do. Not to mention, she supposes that the kittens need to be socialized and Bit possibly scared obedient. As if that would ever work.

“Would you feel better if you brought him?”                            

You don’t answer immediately which is honestly the only answer that Billie needs. You’re thinking about how you would love to bring him along because you’d be able to watch him and you could see how Milo would act around the kittens. You had always wanted a cat, and you supposed now was as good a time as any to see how it might work. Or not. As long as Billie didn’t mind.

Eventually you answer and Billie has to force herself not to smile smugly at how well she knew you already.

“I guess. I don’t want you to feel obligated though. I can’t exactly promise that he won’t get hair everywhere!”

You jump out of your car quickly before opening the back door startling Milo awake. He sits up quickly and you reach into the back seat and unbuckle him before grabbing his leash. He jumps to the ground a little more carefully than he usually would before you hear Billie reply.

“I want you to do whatever you need, Y/N. I’m fine either way. You know I adore Milo.”

You smile at this as you look to your dog who is yawning as you walk to the elevator. You suppose that you can take him with you. He might actually enjoy it. You just had to make sure he behaved and didn’t hurt any of the kittens. Billie said this before you got a chance to and you laugh as you nod in agreement.

“We’ll just have to see how he plays along with the kittens.”

You follow Milo into the elevator before leaning against the wall with a sigh. You suppose it’s decided then. You feel your excitement for tonight increasing again, now that you know Milo won’t be home alone. You just smile as the doors close and you take a deep breath.

“We will. I’ll feed him and then be over in about an hour. Does that work?”

Billie’s nodding before she greets Heather who is with Mickey in the living room.

“I’ll see you both then.”

Part 9

[sanchosammy]

It wasn’t a mistake.

Description: You and Frankie have been best friends for years, which is why you’re shocked to wake up in his bed after a night of drinking together. Too scared he’ll push you away after this, you push him out first. Too bad the two of you are forced to deal with your feelings on a camping trip with the guys.

Warnings: Cursing, talks of sex, drinking, I think that’s all?

NOTE: This isn’t my best work, I am not going to lie. but it is a fun read if you’re interested. Enjoy babes!

Word Count: 5,038.

“Fuck,” You moaned out. The pain from your splitting headache made for a rude awakening from your slumber. A familiar smell of cologne surrounded you as you breathed in, and a coolness lingered over your exposed skin causing you to stir further.

Your eyes slowly lifted open as you looked around your surroundings. Frankie’s bedroom... 

Oh God, Frankie’s bedroom. You noticed his arm loosely hugging your waist as he slept. The alcohol filled memories started to flood your brain and the night came back to you.

You found out about your promotion yesterday, which was kind of a big deal to you. It was something you worked your ass off for and to be recognized with a raise was everything you wanted. The boys wanted to celebrate with you truly, but it all fell through. Everyone had something come up last minute.

It wasn’t something taken personally by you, you didn’t know about the promotion until the last minute yourself. However, that did not stop Francisco Morales from wanting to celebrate this moment with you. The two of you were the closest out of everyone, a friendship that was filled with so many stupid stories and wonderful memories.

With the pictures to prove it.

Frankie was there no matter the situation. The man simply had balance to him, he would be there when you needed some to wrap their arms around you for comfort but he would also spend his weekend helping you with house projects. He does it all. The problem was he was too good of a man. Which left you madly in love with him. It started off throughout your time in the army together. You had only grown closer as time went on. Him and you spending more time together than anyone else within the last three years. 

You thought over the night before to remember how you found yourself in Frankie’s bed. The two of you had never even kissed before, how did it escalate into sex so fast? 

You carefully sat up trying not to disturb Frankie’s sleeping figure. The side of his face was pushed against his pillow as his arm hung around you. He looked so peaceful when he slept. A small smile formed as you noticed his bedhead, you loved his shaggy hair.

You looked around the room as you once again thought over the memories. Frankie wanted to celebrate the promotion no matter how much you told him it wasn’t a big deal. He knew you wanted to acknowledge your hard work deep down so he pushed on anyway. It started off with a small cheers with a couple of beers, and that turned into full blown drinking after Frankie decided to teach you an old drinking game he played as a teenager.

Truthfully, it was a simple game. You needed a shot glass and a bottle cap. The both of you had to take turns attempting to get the bottle cap into the shot glass from a distance, and if you missed then you had to drink. And if one of you actually managed to get the cap into the glass, the other person had to chug their drink.

The both of you knew you were too old to be drinking like this, but the game became a friendly competition between the two of you. The small example round turning into a full blown game and after a while the both of you were equally fucked up.

You don’t know why the mood shifted. At some point Frankie’s touch seemed to light a fire on your skin, and he must’ve felt it too because he was the first one to lean in for the kiss. Which somehow turned into the two of you having sex in his bedroom. You could remember it and you knew Frankie would too. The both of you knew how to handle your alcohol, but the judgement of sleeping with your best friend seemed to slip away with a little help from liquid courage.

Your cheeks burned at the details flashing through your mind. You had fantasized about the idea of sleeping with Frankie countless times, seeming you’ve been in love with him so long, but the real thing was so much better than you could’ve expected. He was focused on you the entire time and dammit… Francisco was a giving lover. 

The picture of him between your legs was now burned in your mind. A shame lingered behind though. You slept with your best friend. How could you do something so stupid? You managed to not openly flirt with the man for over several years and it all came crashing down after the both of you knocked back a few drinks? 

The realization of how this changed everything creeped in. The two of you probably wouldn’t be the same after this. From the silence of the house you could hear your heart shatter if you listened hard enough. All of your time together stripped away from you within a night. 

Your eyes burned at the sudden presence of hot tears. You just wanted to leave at this point, it was overwhelming. How could something feel so right, and somehow end up being so wrong? 

You shifted from the bed removing his arm as gentle as you could. Finding your clothes scattered on the floor and you hurriedly put them on. You were for sure a little hungover, but you’d have to pick something up on the way home because you didn’t have the balls to face him and have the ‘This was a mistake’ talk. You just couldn’t, it would absolutely crush you.

You closed his door and made sure to lock it behind you. The sun was too bright today as you forced yourself into the car faster than usual. The light from the sky and your sudden sky rocket of emotion causing the headache to feel so much worse.

As you backed out of his driveway, you found tears streaming down your face silently. You weren’t one to just burst into tears but this felt like a death suddenly. A death in friendship and a passing of the best part of your life so far. You looked at his house once more before pulling off and heading home.

+

The phone beeped again. You looked at it across the room before turning the TV louder. At this point you simply ignored your phone at all costs. It had been a week since you last saw Frankie, and to be honest you’ve been purposefully ignoring the man. When he did finally wake up after you left, there was no hesitation on his end to call you but you didn’t answer. And then there were several texts throughout the week. 

You tried not to read them. A few you happened to catch a glimpse of because out of a sickened curiosity you wondered if he hated you after what happened. The few that you caught said ‘(Y/N), call me please.’, ‘Can we talk about what happened?’, ‘Please talk to me.’. 

In your mind, all Frankie wanted to talk about was how this wouldn’t happen again. That it was a mistake, or maybe that drunken mistakes happen and he didn’t see you in that way. No matter what he had to say, it was somehow going to hurt you and you couldn’t bring yourself to face it. You were brave in the direct aim of live bullets shooting straight at you on operations, and somehow you found yourself being such a coward at the idea of emotional pain.

The phone rang out again and you found yourself annoyed at this point. Not at the fact Frankie was attempting to reach you all week, but that you were being forced to face emotional baggage of your failed love life. You pulled yourself off the couch and snatched the phone off the counter to silence it, that was until you saw the caller ID. 

You swiped to accept and put the phone to your ear. A part of you was nervous Frankie had told him, but you knew he wasn’t that kind of guy. He didn’t kiss and tell, or so you hoped so. 

“Hey Santiago!” 

“Hey, where you been cariño? You’re usually blowing up my phone more.” He teased you, but he was serious somewhat about the question.

You talked to all of the guys throughout your week, some more than others but that was kind of your thing nonetheless. All of you left the army with a brotherhood, and though they weren’t saps about it. Those boys were emotionally attached to you, and somewhat even adored you.

You sighed out a huff pulling some excuse out your ass about work and the promotion. He brushed the topic forward to what he really called for, “This isn’t going to be a problem for the trip, right?

You paused in your spot as you reviewed his words in your mind… Fuck, the camping trip. Your silence wasn’t the answer Pope wanted to hear. 

All of you planned out this camping trip so everyone could meet up somewhere that wasn’t a bar. It was some idea you had thrown out carelessly one night, and you were actually excited when everyone came around to the idea pretty fast. Even old grumpy ass Tom was willing to join in after a little persuading of drinking beers in the woods away from all his stress and worries. Needless to say, that sold him pretty easy.

However, this was before you drunkenly hooked up with your best friend. You ignored Frankie all week and the trip was in less than three days. You couldn’t possibly face him for several days in the literal woods without any escape from your embarrassment. No, absolutely not.

“I don’t think I can, Santi… I’m going to be pretty piled up with work now.” You lied. You felt awful doing so, but you lied your ass off.

“Listen, you’re not getting out of this trip unless you’re dead or kidnapped.” Yeah, that sounded like Santiago. You tried to cut in with a but before he continued, he brushed off your plea to escape this. “You’re not cancelling on us, (Y/L/N). I don’t care if I have to pull you out of bed Saturday morning, you’re coming with us.”

Fuck me. You have to be kidding me. You internally groaned.  “Alright, alright! No need to threaten me, sheesh. I’ll be ready.”

In much Santiago style, he teased you with a “Don’t pretend like you don’t like it,” which pulled a chuckle out of you in response as you rolled your eyes.

You said your goodbyes before hanging up the phone. The home screen goes back to reveal the five missed text messages and two missed calls from Frankie from this week. You guiltily put your phone back down to once again pretend you didn’t see the unopened messages from him.

You had no idea how you were going to get through this trip without wanting to throw yourself off a cliff. This was about to be torture.

+

You pulled into Frankie’s driveway noticing several men gathered around a van, all of them filled with laughter about something. All of you pitched in to rent a travel van instead of driving two separate cars. Unsure on who decided that bright idea because six of you in a van sounded like possibly the best and worst experience all in one.

The group turned towards you as you shut the car door behind you. “Finally, the pretty one has arrived.” You chirped in as a joke. Will replied before anyone else had a chance to, “Oh please, you know that’s Pope’s title.”

You would’ve smacked him on the arm jokingly, but Will picked you up in a bear hug before you could. You hadn’t seen him in nearly two months, and so the hug was extra special this time. You laughed in his tight hold before he released you back on your feet.  You made sure to hug the rest of the guys as you always did.

The comfort of their hugs is something money couldn’t buy.. After you hugged Tom you noticed Frankie wasn’t around. As awful as it sounded, a part of you hoped he would cancel out on the trip because of the awkwardness between the both of you.

“Catfish is inside, he’ll be out in a second.” Will commented as he noticed your wandering eyes. You just nodded before going back to your car to pull out the cooler. Benny followed behind to help without being asked. 

You purchased half of the food for the trip. Everyone had agreed to pitch money in for different parts of the trip. Food, supplies, gas, and so forth. You pulled your backpack from the backseat before locking the doors, fully ready to start your little adventure.

“Hey,” Frankie’s voice came from behind you causing you to jump. You turned to look at him before mumbling a quiet hey back. You noticed how he looked at you in a way that seemed like he was studying your face rather than simply looking at it. His brown eyes scanning over your features.

You knew he wanted to say something about your disappearance the past week. You could see it on his face. He was fully ready to confront the situation, and he would’ve if your mutual friends weren’t standing behind him.

You looked at each other silently for a moment. Frankie was looking at you like a kicked animal, and he felt like one too. The emotional and physical distance you placed confused and hurt him more than you knew.

You shifted your stare past him to break the uncomfortable eye contact only to find Santiago watching the moment unfold. You pushed past Frankie without a word before heading to the van.

Normally, in any situation, you had unspoken rights to sit beside Frankie. It was just an unofficial rule that everyone naturally followed by now, and that’s probably why Tom and Santiago stared at you suspiciously as you crammed yourself in the back seat with Will instead.

The hurt in Frankie’s face wasn’t something you were blind to. He sat down with a huff coming from his chest as he found a spot in front of you beside Ben. The whole situation was becoming ridiculous and you knew that, but you couldn’t find the strength to talk it out with him. You found it so much easier to avoid the situation completely as selfish as it was.

Will wrapped his arm around you and snickered, “Looks like I stole your girl, fish.”

You cringed in response to his words. Frankie crossed his arms as he adjusted in his seat. If someone didn’t know Frankie well, it seemed like he just ignored the statement completely. A joke that he didn’t find funny possibly. However, you could read his body language. His shoulders remained tight as they often did when he was stressed out.

You wanted to shrink under the vision of Tom who looked at you from the sun visor mirror. It was only a small moment of eye contact before he lifted the visor back up. This was going to be a long three days… 

+

The rest of the car ride wasn’t terrible. The conversation moved to different topics like Benny’s upcoming fight, which you promised to go to. Sunset was already in motion once you arrived at the location and so the six of you carried stuff down the trail as a team.  It kind of reminded you of the past and it was a little heart warming of a thought.

You all agreed on a spot that was far out from the other campers. It could have been the bitterness of a grumpy old man but none of you wanted to deal with people on this trip. It was meant to be total isolation with friends.

“Wait a minute, what’s this?” You asked as you picked up the box. A tent labeled for four to six people. No, he did not. “Will, you seriously expect everyone to sleep in the same tent for three days?”

All eyes shifted to Will. Tom letting out a dramatic huff with a ‘isn’t that fucking great.’ and everyone else let out some sort of complaint at the thought of being squished together for several days.

“What?” Will shrugged as he pulled the box from your hands. He walked back over to where the tent was supposed to go  soon as he snickered out. “You guys scared I’m gonna cuddle you or some shit?”

You rolled your eyes. “No, I’m more scared you’ll get the wrong idea. I don’t think you’re our type, sorry Ironhead.”

The joke earned a few chuckles from the rest of the guys. Will hardly looked over at you as he replied, his focus remained too busy on pulling out the tent materials. “Apparently nobody’s your type. I mean, seriously, when was the last time we’ve seen Ghost date somebody?”

Your face felt warm from embarrassment. He wasn’t wrong though, it had been nearly two years since you’ve been on an actual date. Tom chuckled as he looked up from the little travel grill he was setting up for dinner “He’s got you there. You batting for the other team or something, (Y/N)?”

Everyone pretended to continue their tasks but you could feel their attention on you. You handed him the supplies for dinner as you mumbled out, clearly unhappy by the question “No, I just… haven’t found someone is all.”  

A certain pair of eyes were burning in the back of your head. A pain in Frankie’s heart as he heard the words. It was not only a confirmation that you regretted the week before, but that you weren’t interested in him at all. He wanted to go home already, this was a stupid idea.

There was a weird shift in the air before Will returned to the original topic at hand. “There’s another tent over there. Walmart only had two left in the camping section,” 

And sure enough there was. The second tent was much smaller and by the time you helped finish setting them both up, you realized one of them would only fit two people inside. You fell back into the chair looking at the work you accomplished in the thirty minutes. 

“So, who is sleeping in the peasant tent?” You joked.

“You and Frankie.” Santi commented casually as he helped Tom. The both of them focused on the burger’s he attempted to cook on the small travel grill. Frankie watched you to see your reaction.

“What? Why us?” You mumbled popping the top off your beer. 

Santi continued “Why not? The two of you have already shared a bed before at the rental house. That is unless you’re trying to sneak me into your tent, (Y/N).” He winked before looking back at the food. He flirted mindlessly but it was never serious with Pope, he saw you as a sister at the end of the day.

 “Frankie it is then.” You laughed but inside you wanted to die. You had to sleep next to Frankie for three nights after the awkward tension of sleeping together. What did you do so wrong in the world, you wondered.

Time had passed by pretty quick. Everyone was full from dinner and sitting around the fire with a beer. You found yourself next to Will once again. At this point it was simply to avoid putting your chair next to Frankie to put some distance between the two of you. 

Benny was talking about some girl he was seeing for the last two months. “Yeah, I don’t know. I don’t think it’s going to work out.” He sipped his beer as he stared into the fire.

“What, why?” You asked.

“I think she’s more into the idea of hooking up more than anything.” He shrugged. 

You hummed in acknowledgment before Tom chuckled. “I can’t believe you’re complaining about having sex with someone.”

“Leave him alone, Benny is a teddy bear. He needs a little more care with his lovin’” You mumbled with a teasing smile as you pulled your jacket tighter around you. Benny let out a small ‘whatever’ while laughing, not caring to explain himself further.

“Hey Fish, whatever happened to that girl you were seeing?” Tom looked over at him and everyone followed the action to watch Frankie now.

He looked a little surprised at the sudden attention. When the conversation wasn’t on him, he liked to sit back and listen in silence for the most part. He tended to be a quiet person like that, not wanting to put forth too much.

He shook his head as he looked back down at the fire. His words coming out nonchalant and not interested in the topic, “Tina? That was over two years ago.” 

“No, not that one.” Tom said without much thought. Frankie stiffened as the realization washed over him. He never thought the situation would be brought to light. Tom continued on, “That one hookup a couple of months ago. You two didn’t have anything going on?”

Frankie found himself frozen under your sudden stare on him. His eyes caught yours, and he wanted to die in his seat.

It was a mindless one night stand… That happened twice, funny enough. It was the one thing he never mentioned to you in fear it would ruin his future chance. The whole thing happened seven months ago. Someone close to him passed suddenly and he wanted to forget it for a moment, and a woman he knew from high school happened to be in the bar two weekends in a row. 

“You never told me about that.” You tried to sound uninterested, but the look in your eyes spoke loudly. 

He cleared his throat. The ability to say anything helpful in this situation left him, and he just looked at the bottle in his hand. “It was a mistake anyway.” He said before pressing his lips to the top of the bottle and swallowing a mouthful.

You didn’t know why you were this upset. You sat miserable watching Frankie avoid your stare. 

Your jaw tight from anger building up inside. Not only were you hurt by him keeping secrets, but that wasn’t the part that hurt the most. Jealousy had washed over like some sort of fire. A painful and filled with an unstoppable burning inside. 

“Whatever, I’m going to go piss.” You muttered under your breath as you walked away from the men. You just wanted to be alone and away from him.

Santi shook his head as he stood up from his chair, “You’ve really done it now, Fish.” 

“What is that supposed to mean?” Frankie muttered as he crossed his arms and leaned into his chair hoping to sink into the ground.

Santiago ignored him as he followed you into the woods. He knew this was just some lame excuse to walk away from the situation. If sexual tension was ever in the air, the first person to find it would be Pope. He knew what was going on with the two of you, he figured it out after spending the day watching the both of you interact.

“So, when did you and Frankie sleep together?” 

You jumped at the sound of his voice. Santi matched with your now slowing steps as the both of you stopped completely. Far enough out of view from the boys. You recovered from the small scare before rolling your eyes, “What are you talking about Pope?” 

He chuckled with a small smirk on his face. The moon was the only reason you could see his face considering you forgot your flashlight in your hurry. “Oh, come on. You don’t think I know?”

You considered not answering because you didn’t want to admit out loud. The situation is humiliating enough already. A small sigh left your lips before you nodded in confirmation, your tone sounding defeated. “Alright, yeah. We slept together last week, but we were pretty drunk… It was a mistake.”

“I don’t think it was.” Pope commented as he found a tree to lean against. He watched you for a moment before continuing. “I know this isn’t my place to say this, but… Somebody needs to because Frankie won’t grow a pair. You know the real reason him and Tina broke up?”

You shrugged, “Something about not liking me around.”

He chuckled, “Yeah, that was a part of it.” You watched as he chewed on his lip for a moment. He wasn’t nervous by any means, but deep in thought about what he was about to reveal. “They were in some argument one night, she asked him if he loved you… And he couldn’t say no.”

“What?” You were left stunned. Your mouth felt dry as you processed the information. 

Santi walked over laying a hand on your shoulder, “I’m telling you, (Y/N). It wasn’t a mistake.” He patted your shoulder as he walked past you and continued back to the campsite.

The talk was short and sweet, but it left you more confused than before. Did Frankie actually love you? He mentioned she didn’t like you in the past, but you didn’t know that was the reason. What if Frankie really stayed single this long because he was trying to find a chance with you?

You walked back in silence to the spot you came from. Frankie focusing on you as you walked into view before sitting down again. Nobody mentioned the situation with Santi, or how long you had been gone. It wasn’t worth ruining the conversation over. 

You found yourself leaning on Will’s shoulder sleepily. The chatter of friends filling your ears as you sat there quietly. You didn’t know if it was the emotions draining you or the day of travel. The longer the night went on you found yourself more and more tired.

You closed your eyes to rest them. It was supposed to be a second, but it must’ve been much longer because you opened them again and you were safely in the tent now.  You could tell Frankie was in the tent, his body as far away from you as possible as he slept. When did you fall asleep? When did everyone call it a night? You wondered silently.

You shivered in the drop of temperature. You didn’t think it would be this cold tonight, the weather throughout the day was so warm on your skin and now you had goosebumps. 

“Are you cold?” Frankie’s quiet voice scared you. He shifted from his side onto his back as he looked over at you.

“Shit, you scared me.” You let out a quiet laugh before clearing your throat awkwardly, your voice thick with sleep. “Yeah, I’m sorry. Go back to sleep.”

He paid no attention to your comment as he moved his extra blanket on you instead. You attempted to make out his features as he moved to lay back down in his spot away from you, the darkness of the tent made it impossible though. A moment passed as you listened to the sound of his quiet breathing.

You swallowed hard trying to settle your nerves before speaking up in a whisper. “I’m sorry by the way.”

“For what?” He asked, turning his face towards yours. He wished he could see your beautiful face.

“Everything… I shouldn’t have avoided you, you know?” 

He heard you, but he didn’t reply. The soft sound of crickets outside filled your ears instead. You decided to continue even if it wasn’t the ideal location to do so. “Do you regret sleeping with me?” 

“No…” His voice croaked from whispering. He cleared his throat after a bit before asking “Do you?”

“No,” You admit and although you couldn’t see it, a small smile formed on his face. A chance of hope flashing through his eyes. 

“Can I tell you something?” You breathed out.

“Yeah, of course.” 

Frankie stiffened when he felt your hand brush against his. When he realized you were reaching out to hold it, his fingers automatically linked between yours and he squeezed your hand softly.

“Don’t laugh at me, okay?” Your voice broke with emotion before you let out a breathy chuckle. His thumb subconsciously began to stroke your hand in an attempt to soothe you. “I’m in love with you. I’ve been in love with you since the first time we went on a helicopter ride.”

He stopped to recall the memory. Both of you were still in the army together when Frankie wanted to take you on your first flight. You were so nervous in the beginning, he had spent half the flight talking to keep you distracted. “That was over five years ago.” Frankie commented, the shock was noticeable in his voice. 

“Yeah, I know.” You laughed.

Frankie moved closer to you. His movements slow and careful in case you asked him to stop. He was leaning above you now, you didn’t realize how close he was until you could feel the warmth of his breath. Your fingers moved to run through his hair similar to the way they did the night you slept together. He was hesitant to move in as if he wasn’t sure if he should kiss you, so you leaned in pressing your lips to his. 

The kiss was slow and drawn out this time as if Frankie was soaking in the moment. Unlike the night before when the two of you were nearly falling over each other. He pulled away pressing his forehead against yours “I’ve known since the time you made me a cake for my birthday.”

“Frankie, that was our first year in the Army?” 

He chuckles as he pecks your lips, repeating the same line you used, “Yeah, I know.”

“Why did we wait this long?” You asked out loud. Your arms wrapped around him before he pulled you down to lay on his chest instead. His body heat warming you up within seconds.

He shook his head. He should’ve done this so long ago. A smile settled on his face as the realization settled in he finally got his girl.

[six-of-ravens]

mid-year book freakout

tagged by @bigcats-birds-and-books, thank you!!!!!

Best Book You’ve Read So Far in 2021? Tough choice but I think it’s A Dark and Hollow Star by Ashley Shuttleworth! Or The Scapegracers by Hannah Abgail Clarke... it’s a good year for YA urban fantasy!

Best Sequel You’ve Read So Far in 2021? A tie between A Closed and Common Orbit and Record of a Spaceborn Few by Becky Chambers! I feel like I didn’t really “get” her writing when I read The Long Way to a Small Angry Planet, but now that I do I love every Wayfarers book more than the last.

New Release You Haven’t Read Yet, But Want To? Aaaahhhhh so many! Mister Impossible by Maggie Stiefvater is the first to come to mind, but there are a TON of June releases on my library holds that just haven’t come up yet.

Most Anticipated Release For Second Half of 2021? VERY excited for A Lesson in Vengeance by Victoria Lee!!

Biggest Disappointment? Plain Bad Heroines by Emily M. Danforth. It just didn’t click with me, and I found the writing style annoying (how many times can one say “dear reader,” seriously? also footnotes annoy me if an author doesn’t use them very carefully, either for necessary information or actual funny jokes. using the to point out your own clever wordplay is *eyeroll*). The whole movie thing could have gone MUCH harder into horror, it felt just kinda gimmicky and half-assed. We get the super intense historical plot with the headmistress/teacher slowly going mad, but with the modern-day stuff it was like “haha this is totally just the film crew playing tricks!! OR IS IT??? Lol no it totally is don’t worry.”

Biggest Surprise? I think The Best Science Fiction and Fantasy of the Year (Volume Ten). Rented it from the library just to read Tamsyn Muir’s story, but figured I’d skim the rest to see if there was anything I liked since I thought it’d be all “serious hard SFF” stuff that doesn’t interest me, but I actually loved all but one of the stories (and that one was good, it just had some fucked up alien sex lmao).

Favorite New Author? Cannot possibly pick just one cause I’ve read some GOOD BOOKS lately. I’ll say Ashley Shuttleworth, Krystal Sutherland, Hannah Abigail Clarke, and Robin McKinley.

Newest Fiction Crush? Alecto/Nausicaa from A Dark and Hollow Star OTL

Newest Favorite Character? again, Alecto/Nausicaa from A Dark and Hollow Star. I love a fast-talking asshole who’s good with knives...

Book That Made You Cry? Didn’t expect Record of a Spaceborn Few to punch me in the feels like that. Also, Radio Silence by Alice Oseman didn’t have to go that hard...

Book That Made You Happy? Spindle’s End by Robin McKinley was thoroughly delightful

Favorite Book Adaption You Saw This Year? Shadow and Bone! They did SUCH a good job with the show!! 

Favorite Review You’ve Written This Year? Oh boy I don’t think I’ve written any actual reviews? I made a half-coherent late-night post on the book blog about how The Scapegracers was everything I’ve ever wanted in a piece of teen witch media, like all the tropes were So Right, and I think that still stands, at least. 

Most Beautiful Book You Bought So Far This Year? I haven’t received it yet, but the cover for Persephone Station by Stina Leicht is gorgeous!

What Books Do You Need To Read By The End of The Year? For my new year’s goals: The Riddle, The Crow, and The Signing by Alison Croggon; The Fall of the Kings by Ellen Kushner; Souless and Changeless by Gail Carriger; The Lies of Locke Lamora by Scott Lynch; and The Anatomy of Curiosity by Maggie Stiefvater, Tessa Gratton, and Brenna Yovanoff. For my personal sanity though, I’d like to finish/catch up on some of the half-read series lurking on my shelves, ie.: The Illuminae Files, the Strange the Dreamer duology, The Book of Dust series, and the Lady Helen trilogy. And then there’s the endless stream of library holds...

Not sure who’s done this or not, so tagging anyone who wants to! 

[talkingbl]

The Good and Bad of Make It Right (MIR)

SPOILER WARNING. TW: rape, dubious consent, minors

I wasn't going to do this one for a number of reasons but honestly, my thoughts are so overwhelming that the review just wrote itself so...enjoy I guess

The Good:

FrameBook. If you've watched MIR, you had to know this would be king. Ohm is so incredibly gifted that even 15 year-old him had us all thinking Frame had genuine feelings for Book. Their intimacy just seems so natural at moments that it covers up some of the more amateurish aspects of Ohm's acting. But aside from the incredible chemistry Ohm is able to manufacture as Frame and the vulnerability Toey exuded as Book, it was the unconventional progression of their relationship from competitors (at least in matters of the heart) to lovers that made them so iconic.

Lukmo's character arc. As the series progresses, Lukmo becomes increasingly more sympathetic and is shown to be a loyal, loving friend. By the end of Season/Series 1, you're starting to get all the good parts of him and less of his obnoxious teen-boy "humor."

The first few episodes of TeeFuse. Tee is one of the better characters in this series and much of the charm of the series comes down to Boom's charismatic disposition, Tee's genuine and unquestioning interest in Fuse, and the way Fuse struggles with his feelings for Tee. Because MIR was made in a time before Thai BL tropes were really a thing, Fuse's struggles with accepting his feelings for Tee seem novel and are explored in a much more raw and almost childish way. This inner struggle is different from, for example, that of Pick in Puppy Honey because instead of becoming homophobic, Fuse's mulling over and ultimate acceptance is largely portrayed as more of general indecision and curiosity on his part. Specifically, indecisiveness about whether to break up with his girlfriend. Of course the internalized homophobia is part of why he doesn't accept his feelings for Tee, but not only does he not constantly vocalize it (and no, being in denial about being gay isn't *necessarily always* synonymous with homophobia), but his rejection of Tee also comes largely as a consequence of his already having been in a relationship with Jean.

Most of the actors are the same age as their characters. This roots the world the story takes place in and, by (most likely unintentional) extension, serves as an escape from all of the toxic standards set by shows that cast ripped 28 year-olds to play high school seniors.

The communication between all the couples at one point or another is some of the best in BL. With the notable exception of late series TeeFuse, all the couples have moments of brilliance where communication errors in a typical Romance show would completely ruin the relationships between couples. In MIR, the process of solving communication-related problems is either given realistic development or doesn't need development in the first place due to characters immediately solving any issues that could stem from miscommunication.

Yok as a concept. The fact that he is a main character and is more on the femme side (and has a best friend who is also quite femme) feels like a revolutionary step forward in Thai BL (until you realize it never really happens again 🙃).

The Bad:

FrameBook. This relationship literally should not exist. Its beginning is worse than even TharnType. And it's not really that you can't have characters experience trauma like rape in stories at all, it's just that you shouldn't then downplay it dramatically and then make the rapist a sympathetic character...

Lukmo. I fucking hated this guy at the beginning lmao. He's homophobic, colorist, gross, annoying, and just an all-around asshole. He had 0 redeemable qualities until he saw TeeFuse kiss

TeeFuse. Ch- I just- So Tee rapes a drunken Fuse and its effects are played for laughs, and then they spend the better part of the season not actually being together with Fuse just being completely indecisive about what he wants and Tee just?? doing whatever the hell with discount Saint Suppapong for a couple of eps to, I guess, move on from Fuse? I don't know girl the whole thing was just weird to me.

Most of the actors are the same age as their characters. So let's just address the elephant in the room that all of these kids behaved like adults at some point in the story...ESPECIALLY Frame, Tee and Fuse. This is quite controversial because while it's not out of the ordinary for teen shows to showcase its characters grappling with the complexities of sexual relationships, it is if the actors playing those characters are themselves teenagers. Peak would've been no older than 16 when he began filming for MIR, Ohm no older than 15, and Boom 14-15. And they were not just hinting at sex scenes but actually showcasing foreplay in their scenes.. I understand that it is normal/natural and am not necessarily saying teens can't portray teen issues, I'm just saying that some of it can be seen as a bit much given these guys' ages. Not to mention the fact that the entire approach to sex was very unrealistic. Like, the idea that Book and Fuse would basically be in severe pain for days after having sex just shows a lack of basic knowledge on how average human bodies work and the safe/enjoyable ways to engage in penetrative sex. But beyond the general unsafeness of the sex are some of the ideas that the show portrays as normal in teen relationships that are completely unrealistic--though I find that the most egregious levels of unrealism come in Make It Right 2.

The toilet humor reached new levels of gross with this one.

The casual colorism is just all over the place and is, in fact, one of the main character's primary motivations for befriending another main character (thinking of Rodtang and Fuse here). In fact, I stopped watching MIR 3 times mere minutes into the first episode after Fuse talks about his sister's line of whitening serums. The incessant worship of white skin (and consequent down-putting of dark skin) from multiple characters at several points throughout the show is not only extremely problematic but actually annoying.

The concept of "to get over a girl date a guy" is not even actually the joke it seems to be in this series and is, in fact, played as a legitimate coping strategy. The main problem I have with this is that none of the guys who use this strategy are ever actually interested in men before they try this out. They are painted as straight boys who can magically turn gay at the drop of a hat and, seeing as how it is never refuted, this is dangerous messaging.

I have like a thousand very complicated thoughts on this show but this is a good gist I think. So....yeah.

[tenglows]

Xiaojun, enemies to lovers with 27 + 32 pleasee 💛 im the anon who request the college au with xiaojun and i just wanna say i loved it 🥺 thank you sm for writing it!!

[ 27: isn’t that dangerous? ] + [ 32: i guess i was wrong about you ] hi again!!! thank you so much i’m glad you liked it <3

the prompts

to think you were so excited to live on your own, and now, a few weeks later, you were actually reviewing new apartments. but you had no luck, being impossible to move again so short in time, plus you had already paid the rent, and had no enough money to spend on a whole new one.

the first day of moving was great. tiring, but great. you had arranged all your belongings in the empty space, and when you finally collapsed into your bed, you smiled and thought about how much you had dreamed about being independent. you fantasized about waking up, cooking, taking a long shower, and just go on about your day in the way that only you wished. no rules to follow, no one to please.

the bliss lasted for a couple more hours. but not for long, since the sound of loud music pounding against the walls decided to become a character in your romanticized story. but what harm can one night’s party do? you thought to yourself. the thing is, it wasn’t a one night’s party. you started to believe they weren’t even parties at all, just the most annoying neighbor who couldn’t listen to music at a normal volume.

you had bumped into him one day, when both of you left your respective places at the same time. you had already learnt his name was xiaojun, the older lady next door who was much nicer and specially, more silent, had told you he had always been that noisy. that was why no one wanted to live there and the price was accessible.

he greeted you and he seemed nice, but you really weren’t having it, him being the cause of your lack of sleep and peace these days. deceived by his apparent kind self, you asked him if there was any chance he would lower the music that night, using the excuse of you having an early morning tomorrow. and that’s when it happened. the start of your tremendous loathing.

he laughed. he literally, let out a cocky laugh and left, shaking his head. and of course, he even increased his music volume that night. you ended up punching the wall.

one morning, you groaned when you saw you had ran out of milk. and eggs, and fruit, and possibly anything you would need to make a proper meal. still half asleep, -even though that phrase wasn’t pertaining since there was barely any sleep in you- you put some clothes on and grabbed the shopping bags, figuring you would just go to the grocery store across the street now to get it done with.

inside the elevator, xiaojun muttered a “good morning” you couldn’t bring yourself to return. you stood in silence, as you bit the inside of your cheek.

all of the sudden you heard a bang, your body and the elevator queking. you couldn’t see, but your eyes were wide open. it took you a moment to register that you had stopped moving, and the darkness resulted from the lights going out.

you let out a cuss and started kicking the doors, screaming in desperation for someone to come to your rescue.

“isn’t that dangerous?” the boy spoke calmly, and almost mockily, referring to your smacks.

“oh shut the fuck up” left your mouth without you even having time of processing it.

“jeez, did you get up on the wrong side of the bed?”

“no, actually. because i never fell asleep in the first place. you are to blame for that”

“me?”

“yeah you, and your stupid music”

“hey, my taste in music is good” you didn’t know what to reply, since you had never bothered to properly listen to what he heard. for your ears, it was just noise.

you sat down on the floor, accepting the fact that help would come at some point, but you couldn’t do anything to speed up the process.

you whined when your stomach growled. you still hadn’t eaten anything. xiaojun, standing at your side, shuffled through his jacket pockets until he put a chocolate bar in front of your face.

“here, it’s not the best breakfast but it is something”

you hesitated, not wanting to accept anything from him, but the rumbling in your stomach told you it was either hunger of your pride.

you took the bar and hummed at him, as if that was enough gratitude.

“do you really not like my music taste?”

“i haven’t paid attention to it”

“i’m going to show you a song” he sat down next to you and pulled out his phone, pressing the music icon. you would protest, but there was nothing better to do.

the song was slow and tender, and you liked how it automatically made your head move to the rhythm. xiaojun sang a bit of it under his breath too. you couldn’t fully hear him, but his voice complemented the melody.

“that is nice” you said, when it ended. “it would be nice if you could hear it at a sound level that doesn’t make your neighbor’s life a misery, though”

“that bad?”

“come on, you must notice how loud it is”

he shrugged.

“sometimes i feel alone, mostly at night, so the noise helps with that. and i guess i don’t realize”

his reply was sadder than you expected, and you weren’t sure what you could say to that. you knew the feeling, in fact, that was your main fear when moving. the lonesomeness.

“i never felt lonely ever since i moved, which i thought i would. your music doesn’t even let me feel the solitude. so thanks for that” he laughed, and you let yourself smile as well. “you could try to be with someone when you feel lonely, instead of permanently damaging your ears”

“can i show up at your door then?” he softly nudged your shoulder, and you wondered when he had gotten so comfortable. if this had been any other day, you would probably had yeeted him across the room. but today, you just repeated the same gesture.

“if that means i can sleep, then sure”

“i guess i was wrong about you” he spoke again, you perking in curiosity. “you can be nice when you don’t want to kill me” you rolled your eyes, a chuckle leaving his mouth.

“you’re not so bad yourself”.

[nekoannie-chan]

I’m better

Pairing: Steve Rogers X Reader.

Word count: 1090 words.

Summary: For Y/N being part of the STRIKE team wasn't the best, they underestimated her, but Steve would be in charge of brightening Y/N's day.

Warnings: Underestimation, some bad words.

A/N: This is my entry to the @itsunclebucky ‘s 300 Writing Challenge with the dialogue prompt #10:

“When did you become so smart?”

“When I stopped listening to you”

Also is my entry to the @littlecrazyfangirl-98 ‘s Mi’s 650 Follower Writing Challenge with the dialogue prompt #7:

“Why are you so shocked? I told you I could do anything for you and I meant it”

My native language is Spanish so I wanna improve my writing skills in English if you notice any mistake please let me know and I will correct it.

I don’t give any kind of permission that my fics be posted in other platforms or languages (I translate myself my work) or the use of my graphics (my dividers are included in this), I did them exclusively for my fics, please respect my work and don’t steal it. There are some people here who make dividers that anyone can use, mine is not this type, please look for the other’s people. The only exception is the ones I gifted ‘cuz now belong to someone else. If you find any of my works on a different platform and is not one of my accounts, please let me know. Reblogs and comments are always welcome.

DISCLAIMER: I don’t own Marvel’s characters (unfortunately), except for the original characters and the story.

My other media where I publish: Wattpad, Ao3, ffnet.

If you like it please vote, comment, and give me feedback to improve my skills and reblog.

You hated when they underestimated you, sometimes she is the only girl on the team she was not the best in the world and much less if it was STRIKE, several times you had asked to change your team, but the request had been denied. Your only salvation or at least the one that made missions and training more passable and bearable was your boyfriend Steve.

On the last mission, you had ended up very angry after the incident, it hadn't even been your fault those things had not gone as they should, but the other team members had not followed the instructions making everything chaos, the worst, they had blamed you.

Rumlow had yelled at you while scolding you, the rest of the team insisted that it was your fault instead of taking responsibility until Steve managed to put everything in order and reassure them.

"Calm down, next time I'll ask that it's just a mission where you and I go," Steve promised.

You were in your office typing furiously to be able to write the mission report, you had to make it very clear what had happened because you imagined what the others were going to put, you didn't even notice when Steve came in with a cup with coffee.

"Are you angry?" He asked.

You looked up and with a smile thanked him for the coffee.

"No, I just thought people think I'm not capable of doing things, you saw it doubt what I can do," you answered by drinking the cup.

“You are very smart.”

"But that doesn't seem enough for those idiots, I already asked, I don't know how many times the change of team and they always deny it to me," you said annoyed.

“Who?”

“I have not the slightest idea, it seems that it is not Fury, but it is before the negative.”

"Need help?" Steve offered.

"I'm almost done with this, thanks."

“Do you want to go to dinner later?”

"Sure, it sounds good," you agreed.

You printed the document, you had to deliver it the next day, you left everything to be the first, so it would be more likely that they believed your version to that of your colleagues.

"Why are you with me?" You asked suddenly.

"Because I love you," he replied.

“Why?”

“You are cute, funny, and intelligent, I like how your nose wrinkles when you don't like something, you have the patience for me when I don't understand or don't know something from this time…

You kissed him, he had told you enough reasons.

"I would be able to do anything for you to make you happy," you said.

As Steve had promised you on the next mission, only the two of you were going.

The mission went well until you found that the door had a code, no one had informed them of that and obviously, you did not carry the necessary equipment, although perhaps it would not be useful since it looked old.

"Ughh maybe we should just blow it up or shoot it or something," you suggested exasperated after reviewing it for a long time.

You had not the slightest idea how to open it, at the Academy you had never been taught something like that, at least not with something so old.

"I don't think it's a good idea," Steve replied.

"Then what do we do?"

“Wait.”

Steve recognized it, it was like the one in the chest where his mother used to keep the money, and it took him a couple of minutes to open it.

"Ready, we can continue," he reported.

“When did you become so smart?”

“When I stopped listening to you.”

"It's not funny," you replied, pretending to be offended.

"Come on honey, I was kidding," he said and gave you a few small kisses as an apology.

You took the contents of the box to leave, Steve went ahead to verify that there was no danger and they could leave.

He had not noticed that an enemy appeared behind you, you immediately noticed him and attacked him quickly to prevent him from going backward, upon hearing the shot, Steve turned around alarmed, he was speechless when he saw how quickly you had acted.

“Why are you so shocked? I told you I could do anything for you, and I meant it.”

"Yes, you did," Steve said, remembering it.

"Well I think we should go," you said.

For that mission, they had received congratulations from the superiors.

You were walking slowly to the gym, you didn't feel like going to train with the team, it was exhausting, but not only physically but also mentally, you kept thinking that they were idiots, you were just trying to take a little more time to win More patience, of course, you would appreciate that there was an emergency mission or that the Earth exploded or something happened that prevented the training from taking place.

"Y/N!" Steve called reaching you.

"Steve."

You stopped when you heard him, he stopped in front of you with a smile.

"I have a surprise for you," he said.

He stretched out his arm offending you a folder, you took it and opened it with curiosity, and you smiled when you saw that it was the approval of your change of equipment.

"I wanted you to find out as soon as possible," said Steve.

You rushed him completely happy.

"Is this real?" You asked.

You wanted to check that it was not a dream or hallucination or that you had not read correctly.

"That's right, your request to change teams has been approved," he confirmed.

"Will I no longer have STRIKE training?"

“No, it will not be necessary, the training will only be you and me from now on; By the way you have to think of a name for our new team “, Steve informed you.

"STRIKE and all its members can get screwed then!" You exclaimed with joy.

"I don't think it's a good idea for you to say those things doll, they could hear you," Steve "scolded" you.

"I don't care if they find out, I'll finally get rid of them," you replied.

It was true you did not care if they found out or not, you just wanted everyone to know how happy you were now, miraculously your day had improved and by far.

Steve hugged you.

"I love you, you are the best," he said trying to reassure you.

"I love you too, Stevie."

You kissed him, you didn't care if someone else saw them.

[tomtenadia]

Island Dreams - Chapter 10

Hello everyone! Chapter 10 is finally here and is a good 5k words. I hope you will enjoy. we finally get to know a bit more about Rowan and Lyria and yes, we get to meet her... have your rotten veggies at the ready.

Things are still a slow burn but our lovely are taking one step at a time... they have still too much to deal with. But we almost there. I promise.

Happy reading!

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A couple of days had elapsed and Aelin was on her way to the bookshop with a box in her hands and a smug grin. Once inside the she noticed it was empty. “Rowan?” She called but no reply came. Where the heck was he? “Rowan?” She shouted louder “The shop is open and there is no one around.” With a thus, she dumped the box on the desk and the backpack behind it and went looking for him and found him five minutes later in the back of the shop, deep in conversation with the delivery man. He noticed her arrival and turned “What?” He asked at her annoyed expression. “The shop is unmanned.” Aelin explained, pointing at it with her extended arm. “It was just for five minutes.” Was his excuse. She stormed away and went back to the front of the shop getting ready for another day. Quietly she walked around the shop and took great care in fixing some of the display that looked a bit sad, then she took note of what needed replenishing and restocked some of the most popular titles. They had a few busy days and hoped for a repeat because she was enjoying herself immensely.

“I am back.” Rowan had finally reappeared. “We have been quite busy yesterday, I was just replenishing some shelves.” With a big grin painted on his face he took her hand and dragged Aelin to her history display showing her that her book was now sold out thanks to her display. “I won the bet?” She jumped in excitement, clapping her hands in front of her. “You definitely did and I have to treat you to a massive lunch.” “Told you.” She folded her arms and he smiled back. “I admit my defeat.” Rowan’s hands went up in a yielding gesture. “Good, because I have a present for you.” She walked to the counter and grabbed the box for him while he joined her at her side with a curious expression painted on his face. “Open.” Aelin gave him the box. Rowan opened the box and froze when he noticed it contained a mobile phone. “I don’t understand.” He looked at her. “It’s for you.” Slowly he opened the box and took the mobile phone out “Aelin, this is an expensive gift. I would have bought one if it really meant a lot to you.” Aelin shook her head “No, this is a present from me.” Then searched his eyes “And there might be a little bit of a selfish reason in it.” His expression was puzzled. “The night of the storm, I woke up and I was terrified I wanted to call you and realised I couldn’t. Sometimes I am reading a book and I want to share my reactions with you in the moment and I can’t.” Rowan held the mobile in his hands not sure what to do with it, but Aelin went in his help. She began showing him all the buttons, then switched it on and set it up for him. “Enter you code.” Rowan looked at her, again as if she was speaking a secret language he did not know. “It’s a four digits code that you use to access the phone. You can also set up your fingerprint recognition, but we can do that later.” “When is your birthday?” He asked with curiosity. “September 15th.” “So, 1509 it is” Aelin laughed and entered the code for him. After that she spent half an hour going through all the functions of the basic apps and how to download more. Then she went to the contact list and added her phone humber. “This is my number. Now you can call me and text me whenever you want.” She turned to him and his smile had her toes curl. A moment later she was beside him and pulled him closer and instructed him to put his arms around her neck. Rowan complied and in addition placed a kiss on her temple and in that moment Aelin took a picture of them. That picture became Rowan’s home screen “Perfect,” she muttered, pleased by her job then she turned and gave the phone to him. “You are all set up. You will have to select a ringtone.” “I need to decide which song. Can I add any song I want?” Aelin nodded “Once you have chosen, let me know and I will do it for you.” Rowan played a bit with the piece of technology in his hands that still felt alien to him. “I also have another idea.” She said timidly “Facebook and Instagram,” and again Rowan’s face was one big puzzle and she thought there was something incredibly fascinating in the fact that he didn’t have a mobile until half an hour before and had no clue about the whole world of social media. He was a rare human being. “They are platforms where people share things. Facebook you share things about you and Instagram is for photos.” Rowan flinched. He was not keen on sharing his life on the internet. “But not for you. I have a feeling you would not like that. I was thinking about the bookshop.” She explained “We can create a Facebook page for the shop, on there you can share book recommendations, you can write reviews and talk about new books you get in. You can promote the shop. Instagram you can use it to share photos of the shop and also promote books.” She continued and saw interest dawn on his features “You can advertise your shop on the visit Outer Hebrides website, so if you have tourist browsing for things in Stornoway you will appear in the list.” Rowan was staring at her in amazement “I love the idea very much.” Aelin smiled and launched herself to his computer “Good, now go and deal withe the customers while I work my magic.” “As you wish…”

When Rowan came back from dealing with the customers he noticed that Aelin was very busy at work on his computer. “You know that I will need that soon?” “Paperwork can wait.” She replied not even lifting her head to look at him and Rowan used the moment to admire her a bit more. Everyday since they had started talking, she had surprised him. In every possible way. And now she had gone and transformed into his marketing agent “Why do you care so much?” He was curious. This was not her business but she seemed to have decided to help him in every possible way. “Because independent bookshops are something precious. You are the only one on the entire island. Or at least the only one this big.” Rowan smiled at her and her eyes seemed to turn even more blue. “Speaking of which… orders… You know you could have someone create a website for you and people could place orders online?” Rowan cringed a bit. He was so old fashioned it was pitiful “I don’t know…” his hand scratched the back of his neck. “Ro,” she said, coming away from behind the counter and stopping in front of him. He realised that he actually liked when she called him Ro. “Think about it. You could extend your business from Lewis all the way down to Barra. Other islanders could buy your books online and you’d post them. Of course the postage is at their expenses, but even large bookstore chains do that.” He could kiss her. She was brilliant and he could just kiss her. “I have a friend in London who can help you with the website. You can speak of the phone, he can send you ideas via email…” he noticed she stopped. “Please tell me you have an email.” Rowan rolled his eyes “I might not be evolved enough to have a mobile phone, but I do have an email address and I can use the internet and I buy things online. I am not that much of an underdeveloped oaf.” And he noticed that Aelin began laughing and her laughter was music to his ears. “Sure. Now stop talking. You got customers.” “Yes, ma’am.” and he flashed her a military salute. Once he was done he walked behind her and stared at what she was doing at the pc. “This is you Facebook page.’ And she showed him what to do. How to create posts and update pictures. “So, do I just… talk about books?” Aelin nodded and Rowan took a step closer to her. His chest was not hard against her back. He thought for a moment she would react badly but she surprised him when he felt her leaning into him. His right hand clenched and unclenched at his side resisting the urge to run his hand against her arm, to tuck her rebel strand of hair behind her ear. He restrained himself and just leaned his chin on her head and chuckled. “What? Making fun that I am shorter than you?” “No.” He chuckled again “Just loving that you are the perfect size to fit under my chin. Sooo comfy.” Aelin turned and slapped him gently on his shoulder “Stop mocking my less developed height. Not everyone can be a giant.” “Yes, Fireheart.” And he placed a kiss on the top of her head. “What did you call me?” “Fireheart, you know, like the Queen from Cursed Kingdom.” Aelin looked at him with an expression that he could not decipher. “You remind me a lot of her.” “Because I am hot like her?” Rowan did not reply “You have fire in you. Like her. You are both these amazing women, strong-willed and intelligent…” She was staring at him and he finally removed that lock of hair from her face and his hand lingered a bit longer on her cheek. How could he have fallen so badly for her in such a short time? His head bowed slightly, while his stare was fixed on her lips, imagining how she would taste. She looked up at him, they were so close he could feel her breath. He was about to close the last remnant of space, when someone came into the shop. The two of them jumped apart and Rowan cursed the bad timing. He wanted to kick out the customer and claim the kiss he was robbed of. He stared at her while helping the customer and could not believe that she was leaning into the kiss. She wanted it too. Did it mean she had made her choice? What about Elias? She was still seeing him and could not ignore the sting of thinking of her in the other man’s arms. He was jealous. That was crystal clear. While she was busy he went back to the computer and had a look at her project and he was impressed. She had posted some photos and wrote a lovely blurb about the shop. “What do you think?” She asked, sneaking under his arm so it then was around her shoulder. “I love it.” He said softly. I love you.

A few hours had passed and around lunchtime Aelin had begged Rowan to close and go to Maeve’s to claim her victory meal. Rowan yielded. It had started to slow down a bit so they could afford to close for lunch. “Come on greedy guts. Let’s go and feed you, before you take it out on me.” In response, she gave him a massive toothy grin and grabbed his hand.

By the time they arrived a Maeve’s they were much closer and Rowan had an arm around her shoulder and Aelin was snuggling against him. Her excuse was that she loved his smell and she was trying to cover her clothes in it. “Well, if that’s not a surprise. So I guess you two have finally finished to kill each other.” Said the woman walking them to a table in a corner. “Yeah, I decided that I can keep him alive a bit longer.” “Gee, thanks Fireheart, I am so honoured by your goodwill. I am thy humble servant.” Aelin smiled “Now, stop talking, Buzzard. It’s food time.” She grabbed the menu and began reading. “Buzzard?” Aelin lowered her menu and glared at him “Yeah, when you are mad you have this predatory expression. You look like a bird of prey.” He took the menu from her and hid it behind his back. “Give me my menu.” “The magic word…” “Buzzard…” she stared in his green eyes. “Fireheart…” he returned the menu to her. “I am starving.” And at that Rowan scoffed and Aelin pinched his arm. “What?’ He squealed at the gesture “You are always hungry.” “Now shush.” She told him placing a finger on his mouth. Rowan gave her a few minutes. She was hunched over the menu and her blonde hair had spilled freely in front of her. With his hands he pulled her hair away from her face “How can you read with this wild mane of hair covering your eyes?” Then he pulled all her hair on one side and started braiding it in a nice neat braid and aelin was impressed at his skills. “Hairband?” Aelin removed the hairband from her wrist and Rowan tied her braid. He had lost control. He was aware of that. But he could not stop touching her. He needed the contact with her. After a while Aelin finally made up her mind and placed her order and Rowan did the same, albeit a more normal quantity of food. Once Maeve brought the plates Aelin was ready to dig in as her stomach had started to growl in protest. They were chatting and eating happily when Rowan froze when the door of the cafe opened and noticed who had entered. Aelin recognised the woman as well and under the table Aelin grabbed his hand showing him support. She had noticed his reaction and she wanted him to know she was there for him. Aelin noticed that it was another one of Maeve’s colleagues who served the brunette and not Maeve herself. She had a suspicion that was his aunt’s way to express her displeasure at the woman without being overtly rude. “Rowan.” Said the woman walking toward them and sitting down at the empty chair at their table. Aelin wanted to bite her head off and kick her away for thinking she had the right to sit down with them. In challenge she brought the hand that was on Rowan’s on the table, right in front of the woman’s eyes. It was petty but she did not care. “Lyria…” he finally managed to say something. Lyria looked at Rowan for a second but then her gaze shifted to Aelin and in particular on the had she was holding. His hand. “So, who is your friend, Rowan? Aren’t you going to introduce me to her?” She leaned back on the chair almost in challenge. “I am his girlfriend.” And Aelin put an arm around Rowan’s shoulder and kissed his cheek to prove her point. Rowan in the meantime was stone-faced and silent and she knew she had to fight the woman alone. Well, bring it on. She squeezed his hand almost in apology and her heart ached at his expression. One moment they were having fun, a moment later he looked like a broken man. “What do you want?” He finally managed a sentence but his tone dripped hate. “So you did manage to forget me in the end.” She whispered, but luckily for them the place was quiet “Although I think your tastes have declined a bit.” Aelin was about to punch her. Who was this woman? How could she judge someone she had never met? “I thought you liked women with… more meat.” Lyria grabbed a couple of fries from Aelin’s plate in plain challenge and gave her a smirk that brought rage through her. “I am glad I finally found a real man.” She continued, not caring about the pain she was inflicting on Rowan “One who does not spend his time reading fairytales.” Eventually Lyria stood and went to collect her order, say goodbye to Rowan and leaned toward Aelin “Bye stick.” Aelin jumped up, ready to inflict a beating, but Rowan grabbed her hand. “Leave her.” His tone was strained and that’s all she needed to sit back down and swallow her pride. “She just called me a stick.” Aelin growled “I have curves and boobs.” She sighed and crossed her arms at her chest “What a bitch.” She grabbed one of her fries and dipped it in ketchup “And how dares she touch my food?” Rowan chuckled and finally looked at her. And what she saw in his eyes hurt her. He stood “I just… I need to get out.” He was about to leave but Aelin stopped him ‘I am coming with you.” Rowan shook his head “I need a bit of time alone. Please.” His green eyes were sad again and she just wanted to go to An Lanntair and slap the woman. How dared she treat him like that?” “Okay.” She touched his face and leaned in the touch and Aelin thought it was progress. At least he was not pushing her away. “I’ll call you later.” He kissed her cheek “I am sorry…” “Go. I’ll be fine.” Rowan nodded and left.

Aelin finished her lunch, paid Maeve and left the cafe with renewed purpose. She marched to An Lanntair. She entered the venue and walked to Lyria trying to fight the urge to punch the woman. “Out.” She ordered. Lyria looked at her confused. “Follow me. Outside. Now.” Her voice was a command. Once the two women were outside Aelin finally let go of her anger. “How dare you?” Her voice was full of rage “How dare you treat him like that? Do you have a heart? That man loved you. You were engaged to him. How can you be so mean?” “You are definitely not his type.” Lyria said with a bored expression. Aelin growled “What I am does not matter. What matter is how you treated him and I cannot stand that.” Lyria laughed “Gods, you are in love with him. You just fell for the most boring man alive.” Aelin’s hand clenched “he is not boring. He is a very interesting person, and he is funny.” Lyria’s mocking laughter reverberated in the street “Funny? Rowan funny?” “Maybe he was not funny because of you. Maybe you are the boring one.” Aelin spread her arms and challenged her “Maybe you are the one who is not his type. He likes them with a brain, by the way.” And this time she noticed a reaction in Lyria. “Well, if you love him so much he is all yours. I haven’t had any need of him in a long time.” Aelin was second away from inflicting some form of physical pain on the woman, but then she noticed Lyria’s expression change and a veil of softness appeared in the lines of her face “He was a good man before his injury, and I believe he still is. But after his injury he had to stop competing and something broke in him.” She looked at Aelin “I still loved him deeply at the time. The shop became his new dream. I followed and supported him for a while. He proposed and I said yes, the realised that I was in love with an old version of Rowan and I just left him.” Lyria sat on the bench in front of the community centre “He is a good man. He is sweet and caring. He is perfect for someone.” She finally confessed and Aelin could note a spark of the love she once had for him “But not for me. He became this man obsessed with family and after he proposed he started talking about the future. Our future. He wants the whole romantic deal. I didn’t and I still don’t care for all of it. He deserves to be with someone who can give him that.” Her brown eyes now bore into Aelin’s “And if you can’t give him that, don’t even start this relationship. I hurt him enough. He does not need more pain.” And with that she left and Aelin was stunned at the woman’s words. She felt like crying. She had to talk to Rowan but she had no idea where he went. A text could get her that answer but she doubted he would answer. He clearly needed time alone. So her steps took her down to the marina, she watched the morning ferry dock and people disembark, then with new resolution walked back to the bookshop and opened again without him. The afternoon felt wrong. Not having Rowan in the shop left her with a sense of emptiness. Later in the evening, Aelin was about to switch off the pc and close for the day when she noticed his screensaver. Recognition dawned on her. It was a picture of Butt of Lewis and, if her mind was not playing tricks, she had heard him once mention the fact that he loved that place. She had her answer. Quickly she closed up the shop, locked the door behind her and swiftly ran home. A gut feeling told her that Rowan was at the lighthouse.

It was half an hour later when she arrived at her destination, and when she spotted his car she knew she had been correct. But now doubt settled in her. He had clearly come to this place to stay alone and think and she did not want to intrude. But she could not remove from her mind the hurt expression she saw on him at the cafe. She had to do something. Try at least. And if he’d end shouting at her… well. She’d take that. She got off the car and slowly walked to him. His back to her he was sitting at the edge of the cliff and he was staring at the sea crashing against the cliffs. She was behind him when she heard his voice “I am okay.” He said gruffly. Aelin’s chest tightened. That was not the voice of a person who was okay. Quietly she sat beside him in silence. And for a while they sat side by side staring at the sea. He would talk when he was ready. She was not going to push him. “So, I opened the shop all by myself for the afternoon.” His head whipped to her side and she could spot a weak hint of a smile. “And we had a successful day. I placed a few orders for you and I think I got Miss McKinnon obsessed on a couple of series.” Rowan did not say anything, he just grabbed her hand and pulled her to him “Come here.” A moment later, Aelin was sitting between his legs, his arms wrapped around her and his chin on her shoulder. “I am sorry.” He whispered “It’s just…” Her hands were on his on her abdomen “Shh… no, it’s okay. You don’t have to explain yourself.” His arms were tighter around her and she leaned into his chest. “I had a chat with the bitch.” She felt him stiffen at her admission “I gave her a piece of my mind.” “I have no doubt about it.” “Ro, what happened to you? She said you changed after the injury.” Rowan sighed behind her. For a moment she thought he was not going to answer. That was a far too personal question but she needed to know more in order to understand this wonderful complicated man. “I was good. I loved swimming.” He told her “There had been talks as well for me to compete in the qualifiers for the Olympics. I was living the dream. I was still in Glasgow and had to balance uni and a professional sport but everything was perfect.” The pain in his voice was now clear and deep “Then I got back here and I did manage to continue to train. Lyria became my girlfriend and she loved the spotlight.” He sighed again “What I told you the other day was not the complete story.” She squeezed his hand, she hadn’t told him her whole story either “I kept competing for a while and I did manage to get into the qualifiers for the Olympics. Then one day my life just crashed and all went to hell. During training in the gym I was doing weights. An idiot bumped into me. I dropped the weights suddenly and ripped muscles and tendons. I needed surgery and in a matter of days my dream of the Olympics was gone. Recovery took a very long time.” Aelin gasped “that bad?” Rowan nodded “Butterfly stroke was my specialty. It’s a complicated one and after surgery it became impossible to do it again.” “I tried it once. I looked like a demented whale. It was embarrassing.” And finally she heard Rowan chuckle. “I took it badly and for a while I was… cathartic. But Lyria still was beside me. Then the idea for the bookshop came. I had always loved books and I thought that was the way for me to follow a new dream. And you know the rest.” Aelin twined her fingers in his “It’s a nice dream.” “It is.” “I think Lyria always resented me for my injury. I was famous in town and she loved being stopped and having other girl jealous at her for being with me.” “So I assume her current boyfriend is a Hollywood star.” Rowan squeezed the hand back. “I doubt it, but definitely someone with money and a big job. She… likes to be spoiled, and me being a professional swimmer paid a bit more than being a lousy bookshop owner.” “You are not lousy.” Her head turned and searched for his eyes, to tell him how much she believed him. “She sounds very shallow.” Rowan sighed again and Aelin felt a pang of guilt for making him talk about a part of his past life that clearly still did hurt “She wasn’t always like that. She changed a while ago. Her company of friends had changed and they became a sort of bad influence.” The wind had started to pick up a bit but Aelin had no intention of going back home and she decided it was time to tell Rowan her complete story. Her full reasons for moving in the middle of nowhere. He had opened up to her, she owed him at least that. “My story is not complete either. I told you about my failed marriage, but there is another reason while I escaped.” Rowan kissed the top of her head “You don’t have to.” “Yes, I do. You told me yours and I need to tell you mine. I want us to be honest to each other.” He gave her a squeeze in response. “I told you I was a doctor. I was working in St. Mary’s Hospital which is one of the major trauma centres in London. I slaved to be able to work there. They had a limited numbers for interns and I did manage to get in. Once I was officially a doctor I started to slave to make my way up the ranks I kept working like a madwoman and did all I could to become one of the best. Then a few months ago our head of department announced he was going to retire. And I knew I was going to fight to get that job. I wanted to be the head of the cardio thoracic department. It was my dream, my goal. At the interview I thought I had the job. Two days later I get a phone call telling me that unfortunately the position had been given to another candidate.” Aelin breathed out to calm the rage. “I would have accepted it if they had chosen a candidate better than me. But they didn’t” “Let me guess. Daddy’s little boy or girl got it.” Aelin nodded “The son got it. This idiot who barely made it through med school got it because his dad pushed for it.” Aelin stood and began pacing feeling the need of release all the anger that surged in her every time she talked about that “I was in the middle on the divorce with Chaol. This was the last nail in the coffin. I kept going back to work but I hated it. So much.” With a swift movement Rowan stood and stopped her, placing his hands on her shoulders making sure she was facing him. “Then one day I saw a picture of a Scottish island and I decided that I was out of there. I took a sabbatical. Two week later I was on a plane to Glasgow. A week later I was here.” And the tears came back in full force. Rowan’s arms went around her and she sagged against him and wept until she was spent. “I am glad you came.” That was as much as Rowan could manage to tell her that he was madly in love with her. Baby steps, he kept telling himself. They clearly were far too hung-up on whatever happened before and they both needed time to heal, but he felt like they were finally getting there. Having Aelin in his arms was wonderful enough. He was happy to take anything that she was willing to give him just now. Even if it was just embraces, caressed or holding hands. He would wait for her. “Ro, when I said girlfriend before…” “I know, it’s fine.” And he squeezed her tighter then kissed her head. “I have an idea that will cheer you up hopefully.” She looked up at him and gave him a big smile “I am all ears.” “Tomorrow is Sunday and you know everything is closed on the islands and so is my shop. So, how about an adventure?” Her arms were around his neck in an instant “Yes!” “Let’s go back in the car, it’s getting cold and I’ll tell you my plan.” Aelin ran and Rowan laughed. And a few minutes later they were on their way back. “So, we are leaving the islands tomorrow. We are taking the ferry back to Ullapool. There are a couple of amazing spot that I want to show you. We need to take the ferry at 8am which means check in will be from 6am. Will you manage?” “Are you kidding me? I’ll be up and ready whenever you need me to.” Rowan’s hand went on hers and smiled her back “Good.” Once back in town Rowan drove Aelin home, feeling overprotective and all. She got off the car and he followed her in front of the house. “I’ll come and pick you up at six, is it okay?” “Perfect.” “Wear something comfortable but also layers and a windproof jacket. The forecast for tomorrow is really good, but it’s Scotland.” Aelin nodded. He brushed his hand gently against hers “I’ll se you tomorrow.” Aelin kissed his cheek “Tomorrow then.”

Once she was in the house she squealed in delight and texted Lysandra with an update. She was giddy. And finally happy.

[rosaline-kei]

Under My Wing - Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own Boruto/Naruto nor the characters.

Fandom: Boruto: Naruto Next Generation.

Parts: 「1」 ,「2」, 「3」

Chapter 2′s Title: It Rises.

Synopsis: After her father had taken up Boruto as his student, Sarada began to feel a little... at a loss. Sure, Sasuke still teaches her some things, like how he taught her that Fireball Jutsu. But unlike to Boruto, he isn't her fulltime mentor. And now, she doesn't know who to turn for guidance in mastering her Sharingan. That is, until the Sixth Hokage came along. (Might contain Manga Spoilers)

Rated: T

Pairings (To note: Romance isn’t the main focus, though. But there will be pairing moments, just not a huge lot): Boruto Uzumaki/Sarada Uchiha , Sakura Haruno/Sasuke Uchiha , Naruto Uzumaki/Hinata Hyuga

Read it also on / Leave a Review at:

Ao3 or FF net

Author’s Note (READ AFTER READING CHAPTER): The original Author’s notes is damn long, so if you want, read the full thing on my ao3/ffnet accounts. A summary of it is that i found it hard to write, and i hope i don’t mess up lol.

Please Leave A Review (either here or the above stated fanfic sites!)! Constructive Criticism would be Appreciated :)

Also if any of y'all are wondering about the Chapter's title (it rises), it can be seen as Sarada's past curiosity rising or the rise (start) of the relationship between Kakashi and Sarada, the rise of troubles, the rise of the resolve in regards to Sarada's dissatisfaction etc etc 

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It was a few days ago when Sarada had confided in her mother about some of the things that had been bothering her. Although, upon Sasuke's return from another one of his investigation related missions, that conversation regarding her troubles was discontinued as of now. Instead, a new conversation took place at their dining table as they ate dinner together. It was a normal family talk involving catching up with recent events. But it didn't touch on Sarada's present troubles. And whenever the young Uchiha felt like the topic was about to shift anywhere near to her personal emotions, she'd swiftly find a way to change it.

Soon enough with the day coming to an end, Sarada went to bed albeit earlier than usual. Her excuse was because she felt exhausted after running some errands that day (even though, in reality that wasn't the case). The real reason however, was because she wanted to avoid continuing the earlier conversation she had with her mother should she bring it up again. And now that Sasuke was back at home, she especially didn't want to talk about it anymore since it did involve him.

She… just didn't want to be a bother to both her dear parents.

…

"Did something happen with Sarada?" was the first thing Sasuke had asked when he was sure that Sarada was asleep and when he was alone with Sakura, sitting next to her on their bed.

So he had noticed. Sakura thought. "What makes you say that?" She asked back.

"When I came back home and took a glance at her while she was still sitting on the couch, she looked a little… sad." Sasuke didn't know how else to put it. "But then she changed her expression into something more… cheerful when she then went forward to welcome me home. And she's just… acting a bit different. Did she get into trouble…?"

"No, she didn't get into trouble." Sakura assured. "She's just… feeling a little left behind."

"'Left behind'?" Sasuke tilted his head slightly. In his eyes, Sarada was a strong and intelligent girl who possessed many talents. So he didn't really understand what she meant by 'left behind'.

That's when Sakura began to elaborate further. She told him the things Sarada had told her. She told him about the dissatisfaction she had of the fact that despite all her hard work in the two years ever since she awakened her Sharingan, there was still only one tomoe in both her eyes. She also told him the things that Sarada didn't say out loud. It was just as Sarada had expected—that even if she didn't convey all her worries verbally, her mother could almost always read her and see through her.

"I think she just envies the fact that you're Boruto's sensei, and that he is your pupil." Sakura said, "I don't know when this envy started. It didn't always seem to be like that. She was genuinely happy for Boruto in the beginning when you did take him in as your pupil after all. But maybe when her Sharingan wasn't evolving as fast as she had anticipated, she must have felt left behind when she saw her other teammates' progress. And then, envious that the only experienced and skilled Sharingan user known to her took in a non-Sharingan user as his pupil and disciple. I understand that you still do teach her new Jutsus from time to time, but there is a big difference, you know, between training someone occasionally, and taking in someone as your personal pupil."

Sasuke bit his lip slightly as he felt a familiar feeling rising within him as Sakura explained Sarada's troubles. Guilt. "So, I'm the one who made her have that look earlier…" He muttered to himself.

Sakura sighed softly, before her hand reached out for his, gripping it reassuringly. "Don't worry. I don't think she resents you for it. She could never truly resent you." She soothed, as if seeing through his own worries. "But, you have a reason for taking in Boruto, and not her, right?"

Sasuke's eyes trailed towards her hand which gripped his, before shifting it to entwine it with hers as he nodded. "Yeah."

He had told Sakura the reason before, but decided to reiterate it anyway. "Sarada's already strong. I am certain if she trains under Konohamaru for a while more, her Sharingan is bound to develop soon enough. Moreover, I have no doubt that Sarada is a smart girl. She already has a proper goal in mind, she is quick-witted, rational and more than anything, unlike that Boruto, she is mature."

Sasuke definitely had faith in his daughter. "She's already on the right path… I don't know how else I can guide her aside from teaching her some Jutsus every now and then…" Although, now that he thought of it, he realised that recently she hadn't really asked him to teach her any new Jutsus whenever he was around in the village. It had also been a while since he last taught her something new. At first, he assumed it was because she had been focusing on honing other skills that were taught by Konohamaru instead. But now that Sakura brought this up, he didn't think that that was the case anymore. After all, there must have been a reason why Sarada hadn't consulted him about this—about her Sharingan at all, right? There must have been a reason why she hadn't ask him to teach her anything new for quite a while now, right? Was it because she didn't want to be a bother? Because she didn't want to be annoying?

Sasuke could only wonder how long she had been feeling this way.

"Then there's that loser's son," He continued, sighing quietly, "He first asked for my mentorship because he wanted to find out Naruto's weakness. That isn't a goal nor the mind-set a Ninja should have. Boruto has the potential to be a great Ninja if I manage to change that immature thinking of his and his immature ways. Gradually, he's realising the path he should take as a Ninja, the one that involves not finding out Naruto's weakness for the sake of pummelling him. He's also beginning to see the other sides of Naruto and not just the one that he used to want to really pummel."

Sakura listened to him intently. When he finished speaking, she gave her response. "Mm… I can agree with you to a certain extent." She spoke, "But, you know, try to see a little from Sarada's perspective. Two years of training and going on missions, and her Sharingan is still yet to develop a second tomoe in both her eyes. Whereas in that span of two years, her two other teammates are showing clear development of their respective gifted abilities. For example, from what I heard, there's Mitsuki's getting better at handling his Senjutsu—his Sage Mode, and aside from Boruto's improvement with his Rasengan, there's also the recent discovery of his Jougan which is bound to boost his strength once there is more knowledge garnered about it."

When Sakura was done talking, Sasuke undeniably had a lot of things to say, and had felt a lot of things as well— all of which, he was unable to articulate and describe. He wasn't good with words.

After a short pause, he managed to ask, "What should I do?" His eyes then shifted its gaze to Sakura's green hues. He looked troubled and was at a loss of what to do now after discovering his daughter's worries. There were still many things he wanted to say and ask for her advice, but he found it difficult to convey it to proper words. And when he finally managed to voice out one of those thoughts, he found it to sound harsh and terrible.

"I can't be her sensei."

He didn't mean for it to be harsh and terrible, though. He had his reasons and Sakura knew that. So she didn't ask him why. He had said enough and she had understood enough, even if he didn't say all the other things in his mind out loud. She could tell what he wanted to say and what he meant just from the way he had spoken, the expressions he made as he did, and the way he'd look at her as he talked. "If that is what you think, then there is no helping it." She said, and she didn't sound upset nor disappointed with his choice which did catch him a little off guard. He sometimes wondered if he deserved someone like her, someone who was able to understand what he really meant, even if he couldn't word it out properly.

"I have a suggestion." She offered softly, with a gentle and assuring smile. "I could ask Kakashi to be her sensei instead."

His eyes widened as he heard her suggestion, he didn't expect that. Kakashi?

It didn't seem like a bad suggestion and idea, though.

Back in the present, Sarada—who had just found out that Kakashi was going to be her personal mentor, her sensei—was still undergoing the stages of denial.

"Did… I hear you wrongly? What do you mean by sensei? And why me?"

"No, you didn't hear anything wrongly, starting from today, I'm going to be your personal mentor." Kakashi reiterated, finding her denial quite amusing.

"But why me?" She repeated, still in disbelief. "Moreover, you're the Sixth Hokage… I don't want to unnecessarily make your schedule busier than it probably already is."

Truly, Sarada was a considerate girl. Sakura wasn't wrong about that. "I heard from someone that you're having issues with mastering your Sharingan," Kakashi started. And already, Sarada knew who that someonewas—her mother. Of course she would be able to read her worries and troubles like an open book. There was no running away from Sakura's discerning eyes when it came to her beloved daughter. Though now, she wondered if she had told her father about her unspoken thoughts and troubles. She'd rather have him not know about her own dissatisfaction about her abilities, her eyes… herself.

After all, Sasuke was already busy with his responsibilities as the Shadow Hokage for The Hidden Leaf Village—Konoha—not to mention, he was also Boruto's mentor. And in addition all that, he still had the duties of a father and husband. The last thing she wanted was to be a bother to him, or worse, be a pest to him so she kept her mouth shut. He already had enough on his shoulders.

"Also, I'm not the current Hokage anymore. Fortunately enough, unlike Naruto who's the Seventh, I don't have to deal with mountains and mountains of paperwork so often anymore." Kakashi spoke, a light-hearted laugh following after. "And although as the Sixth Hokage, I still have responsibilities from time to time, I'm not as busy as before. So rest assured, Sarada. As for your other question of 'why me', Well…" He trailed off, thinking of the best way to say out his reasoning. Although, in the end he only shrugged and said, "I just want to."

Sarada blinked her eyes in response. Eh?

The white haired male then turned away, beginning to walk off to another direction as he signalled for Sarada to follow. "Let's go to a more open space. I'd like to get a closer view of your current strengths and weaknesses."

"W-Wait!" The young Uchiha called out, she still had too many unanswered questions about the entire situation. Though there was one in particular that bothered her a bit more than the others. "Why you?"

In that instant, Kakashi turned back, causing Sarada to instantly flinch despite the fact he wasn't exactly glaring at her even after she had asked something seemingly rude. Her hands immediately went up, waving in defence. "I-It's not that I'm underestimating you or anything like that! It's just…if I want to improve my Sharingan… then shouldn't—"

"I was a Sharingan user." He said, cutting her off. And from his sudden serious tone that had risen and overtaken his earlier light-hearted one, the raven knew that he wasn't joking or lying to make her more accepting of him as her new sensei.

Kakashi took note of the shock and surprise that Sarada expressed once those words left his lips. It seemed like after the previous war, his famed nickname of 'Kakashi of the Sharingan' had died out overtime since he no longer had the Sharingan. So it wasn't a surprise to him when someone of the new generation, that being Sarada, found this fact to be something new. Moreover, there was also some history about the previous war and other sort of things that had been censored and kept hidden to the new generation and pretty much the public eye. For example, the full history of the Uchiha Clan was limited to the public.

They had their reasons for hiding certain bits of history, one of them being that they didn't want to incite anymore hatred. Admittedly, as time went by and as Sasuke atoned for his sins, most people no longer despised him for the deeds he had done in his corrupted past. But there was still a minority of people who didn't think that way, though they didn't lash out nor cause chaos due to the respect they had for Naruto who only wished for and wanted peace.

There were times where Kakashi wondered if keeping such things away from the new generation was an overall good decision, though.

Shrugging those thoughts away, he resumed his walk, expecting her to follow and expecting to receive an infinite bombardment of questions from her soon enough.

It had been an hour since Kakashi revealed to Sarada that he was an ex-Sharingan user, and her questions were still yet to be answered.

"I will answer your questions after you demonstrate your current skills." That was his first answer to her several questions that she had listed out and bombarded him with during their walk to a more spacious training ground.

So within that hour, she had showcased her abilities in all the Jutsus she had learned and copied from. And by the time she had to display her skills in Kunai throwing, her lack of concentration was becoming more apparent to Kakashi when she missed the bullseye by a long-shot on her first throw.

It wasn't like Sarada to show a lack of concentration. But after she had found out that Kakashi used to have a Sharingan, too many thoughts began to cloud her mind. She was distracted and it was clear to Kakashi that whatever she was currently displaying to him most likely wasn't her at her best.

Maybe I should have told her that after I had assessed her. He thought with a sigh as he watched her miss another target. Regardless, as a Ninja she shouldn't lose concentration over any news, whether it be shocking or not… I can't blame her too much, though. But if this had been in a battlefield…

"Sarada." Kakashi called out to her before she could throw another Kunai (and maybe even missing the target again), though in a stern way which was enough to make her flinch. "Focus. In a real battle, you can't lose concentration when your opponent tells you something shocking or disturbing. You will lose if you do."

"Y-Yes… sorry." She muttered. She felt frustrated with herself, she really did. Here she was, having the honour to be the Sixth Hokage's personal pupil and yet she was making a fool of herself in front of him right now.

She knew she should put aside the questions and other things that were currently pestering her after Kakashi said that he used to have the Sharingan. But she couldn't.

There was so little she really knew about the Uchiha Clan. Her knowledge of the Uchiha Clan was as limited as the book she read about it in the library a long time back. And now, today, she found out that a non-Uchiha had the Sharingan.

She was confused. And some thoughts of the past came barging in, distracting her.

There was a time when her curiosity about the Uchiha Clan had surfaced again. But when she asked her parents, her father especially, they always seemed to avoid the subject.

"That's something your Papa should tell you, Sarada." Her mother would say.

"I'll tell you another time, when you're older." Her Papa would say.

She tried to be understanding about it. But as time went by, she grew impatient. And in the end, she realised she didn't understand at all.

Alongside Team 7, she had saved several lives, she faced and fought threats to Konoha and she had survived deathly fights with those threats. And yet, she wasn't old enough to know the history of her own clan?

She didn't get it. Was there something to hide? What was so bad about her clan's history to the extent that not only the book at the library was restricted from telling her, but even her own parents were just as restricted as that book in telling her anything?

And as time went by, the only thing she found out was that her father in particular, didn't seem like he really wanted to touch on that subject. At least not now. He was always… hesitant.

She didn't want to start an argument with him. So in the end, she stopped asking. But now with the new knowledge of the fact Kakashi had the Sharingan, she wondered if those questions would now be answered. If he was willing to share that he once had the Sharingan then maybe he'd also be willing to share the other things pertaining to the Sharingan and maybe some information about her clan… right?

But then again, deep down she already knew that was… unlikely. After all…

"Stop thinking." She uttered to herself, cutting her own thoughts off as she tightly gripped onto her Kunai. "Now isn't the time to falter."

Taking a deep breath, she closed her eyes as she tried to calm herself. "Focus… focus…" She whispered quietly to herself before she opened her eyes, proceeding to throw her Kunai towards the target with great force and as much precision she could muster—but alas, it missed the bullseye… by only a millimetre.

Damn it. She cursed in her mind, her fist clenching. Even something this simple, I…

"Sarada." Kakashi called out to her again, making her flinch again. She turned towards him, expecting to see a disappointed or stern expression which would be followed up by him saying he didn't want to mentor her anymore. She expected the worst, but that wasn't what she met with.

"Come here." He said in a calm tone as he signalled her over. And as instructed she walked over, albeit nervously. "Sit." He added as he took a seat down on one of the large logs lying about. "You're not in trouble, don't worry." And it seemed like he noticed her nervousness.

How could she not be nervous? She was in the presence of the Sixth Hokage, who she just so happened to have messed up in front in the simplest form of training. Granted, she had met and spent time with Kakashi before when she was younger—but that was only as an Uncle. His presence as an Uncle was… light-hearted, there was nothing to be scared of from his aura. However, ever since after the announcement of him becoming her sensei and during the assessment of her abilities… she felt something different from him.

No longer was she in the presence of Uncle Kakashi, but instead she was in the presence of not only the Sixth Hokage, but also a highly-trained Ninja who was well-respected in the Ninja world. And the current aura of his that she felt was anything but light-hearted. She didn't know how to describe it other than the fact it was overwhelming. The last time she ever felt this overwhelming aura and even strength from him was probably back at the Academy, when he was the overseer for one of their exams.

She took a seat next to him. "I'm sorry I got distracted." She muttered, already recognizing her mistake. Kakashi took a brief glimpse at her, noticing the disappointment written all over her face. "As long as you correct it, it's fine." He replied.

A small gust of wind blew by as silence slowly diffused into the air. Though before it had the chance to make the atmosphere any more tense and nerve-racking, Kakashi broke the silence. "An old friend of mine gave me his Sharingan." He started as he looked up to the sky while Sarada turned her attention towards him. "He was an Uchiha, of course. And my teammate back during my younger days. Some things happened during one of our missions which had resulted in what I thought was his early death, and then before he 'passed', he entrusted his Sharingan to me."

Even though Kakashi's tone had the same calm in it as he spoke about his past, Sarada could feel the sorrow and grief he had as he talked about his old friend. "But as you know I don't have the Sharingan anymore." Kakashi continued when she didn't respond. "It's a long story. But in short, I returned it back to him after everything. He's no longer around anymore."

"Oh… I… I'm sorry for your loss." Sarada muttered, in a sympathetic way. "I didn't think—"

"It's fine." He assured.

His words had answered some questions of hers, but it had also left her with more. Like, if that friend of his didn't pass away in the beginning, why didn't he take back his Sharingan sooner? What did Kakashi mean by 'long story'? What did he mean by 'after everything'? What was 'everything'? Did it have something to do with the previous war or… was it something more?

What happened? Sarada pondered.

And as if he read her mind, he continued. "That's all I can say right now." Kakashi said, internally reminding himself not to speak too much of the past—not to expose too much of the Uchiha clan. It wasn't his story to tell, right?

"In time, you'll understand everything." He added on, and he had hoped that'd be the case. She shouldn't be kept in the dark for too long, after all.

I'll tell you another time, when you're older.

In time, you'll understand everything.

Those words were practically the same, and it annoyed her. From something sympathetic, her expression shifted to something troubled. How much longer would she have to wait?

"What's with that expression of yours?" Kakashi asked, noticing her sudden change in emotion.

"It's nothing." She lied. It's everything—that was the real truth.

"Really now?" Kakashi offered a light-hearted laugh. He didn't believe her a single bit. He had enough experience in his life to know that that wasn't the truth. But at the same time, he also didn't expect her to open up to him immediately. He had only just become her sensei after all. But as her sensei now, he had to reach out if he wanted to build trust and form a connection with his new student. "You don't have to open up to me immediately, Sarada. But if you do, I won't tell your parents if that's what you wish." And Kakashi wasn't lying when he said that. He didn't mind keeping some secrets. He wanted to build trust. Although, if one of the secrets Sarada told him for some reason was something as extreme as her wanting to start some war, he would have to go back on his word about not telling her parents. But that was unlikely. The slightest thought of that just happening seemed like a badly written joke.

Sarada briefly debated if she should tell him some of her troubles—troubles that she hadn't even told her parents directly, because she didn't want to burden them. She could sense Kakashi's genuineness and was certain he wasn't lying when he said he wouldn't tell her parents. And apart from the overwhelming presence and aura she had felt from him as the Sixth Hokage and skilled Ninja, there was also something comforting about him—reassuring, even. It wouldn't hurt to tell him some things, right? She thought to herself. I… don't know who else I can talk to about these things.

"I just wish that my father would tell me about the Uchiha clan, and his past. He doesn't seem very open to telling it, and I don't know why. I want to know why. He's… always hesitant. And at that time, I didn't want to start an argument with him over something like that. So I eventually ignored and tried to bury away any remaining curiosity I had left. But now after what you just told me about the Sharingan, it reopened that curiosity… just a little. And I know I'm getting my hopes up unreasonably high when I think you'd tell me more about my clan…" Sarada started, letting the vulnerable side overtake her in that moment as she decided to give him some of her trust. "Because in the end, as much as you've already opened up a little about yourself in regards to the Sharingan you once had, I already know that you won't answer too many of my questions about my father or the Uchiha Clan explicitly and directly. It's… because you respect him and you believe that it is something he should tell me, right?"

Kakashi was impressed by how sharp she was to already know the reason why he wouldn't tell her too much about the Uchiha Clan's history. He made a mental note to himself to be a little more cautious around her. "I'm surprised you'd already be aware of that much." His words were meant as a small compliment towards her sharpness, but she only shook her head in response. It wasn't because of her sharpness that she knew that much. "It's nothing worth a compliment." She sighed softly and offered a weak laugh, "I only know this because my mother is the same."

That's something your Papa should tell you, Sarada. Those words began to echo in her head.

There was a brief pause between the two's conversation. Sarada was reflecting on certain things while Kakashi thought back about his conversation with Sakura before.

"I can't believe you're making me come out from my retirement as a sensei, Sakura." He had groaned. "But you do realise," He continued, his tone gone solemn, "If I become her sensei, her finding out about Sasuke's past as well as the tragedies of the Uchiha Clan might inadvertently happen sooner than planned." Kakashi had said, knowing that Sarada for the most part, was still kept in the dark.

Of course Sakura had been aware of this. Sarada had to know that Kakashi was a Sharingan user if she was to fully accept him as her personal mentor and let him help her with her Sharingan. It was inevitable for her to know that much. And because she'll know he was a Sharingan user, her curiosity that she had buried in the past, would arise again. "I know." Sakura sighed.

"… I don't mean to pry," Kakashi spoke, "But among this generation's Ninja, Sarada is one of the most mature. It wouldn't hurt to let her know some things, if not, she might end up finding out about it the hard way."

Sakura's eyes only softened in a sorrowful way. "That is true." She agreed quietly, "But we're all afraid of something, aren't we?"

Kakashi knew she wasn't solely referring to herself, but Sasuke too. It didn't take a genius to understand what Sakura meant and what he was afraid of.

If a daughter found out that her father was once the most wanted criminal in Konoha, how would she feel? And what would be the worst that can happen after the reveal?

Admittedly, times have changed, so has Sasuke who now acted as the Shadow Hokage, protecting the village when Naruto couldn't. But again, there will always be that minority who thought otherwise.

On a different note, whatever the case might be, he knew that at the end of the day it wasn't his story to tell. He was just her sensei. He was just supposed to help guide her, improve her strengths, diminish her weaknesses, shape her into a better Shinobi and maybe even provide some assistance to her walk towards the path of becoming the Hokage. He wasn't supposed to be a ladle and stir up drama and chaos within the Uchiha Household.

"Kakashi-sensei." Sarada called out, snapping him out of his thoughts. It was the first time she had addressed him as her sensei, and yet she sounded unsure and maybe even still a little in disbelief. She turned towards him as she asked again, "Why did you decide to become my sensei?"

Before Kakashi had the chance to respond, Sarada continued to elaborate. "You could've said no. You had no obligation whatsoever even if you were a Sharingan user. I don't understand why you'd come out of your retirement for the sake of helping me with my own Sharingan."

Her disbelief and denial was truly amusing. Was it so hard to believe an old man like himself would come out of retirement?

"Well, I don't think I would've been able to say 'no' either way." He replied without thinking all too much. "You want to improve. You make an effort to improve. What kind of Hokage, Ninja, Uncle or even person would I be if I didn't help someone as earnest as you? Especially when I know I have the experience and knowledge to help you grow your strengths, and perhaps grow as a Ninja. Moreover, I'd rather not see an immense amount of potential go to waste for someone as earnest as you. In short, I just want to."

Sarada was at a loss for words by the time Kakashi finished explaining himself. She felt touched. And in that moment, she felt the troubles that had been weighing on her mind disappear for a fleeting moment. It was just nice to hear compliments as genuine as his in regards to her abilities, especially when she had been feeling left behind recently.

"Now then." Kakashi said as he stood up, stretching his arms as he walked towards the spacious training ground. "It's still early. And there's one last thing I want to assess you on now that I know your mind has been cleared a bit."

Sarada quickly stood up after. "S-Sure…" She stuttered, "What is it…?"

"It's nothing too difficult. It's to help me get a closer assessment of your current skills." He had said, and as he got into a fighting stance, Sarada could've guessed what it was, but she didn't think for it to be true until he told her. "It's combat. Treat me as the enemy, and don't hold back."

[crasherfly]

What I’m Up To

Taking a brief pause from my fantasy screenplay to talk a bit about what I’m playing/reading/listening to these days.

VIDYA GAMES

Cities: Skylines- Still working on my shithole city in all its glory. San Cruz has expanded to over 100k residents and in the past week I’ve built a level 3 park, extensive monorail system, and even extensive helicopter pickup lines. It’s still a terrible place to live, but it’s also fun to grapple with the challenges of a desert map. 

Yakuza 0- I’m gonna post this take here, since we’re not on twitter and I’m safe from the mobs- Yakuza 0 is the experience everyone promised me Witcher 3 would be. Thrilling combat, a fascinating game world, and lovely, meaningful side quests. If this sounds like I’m digging at Witcher 3, I promise I’m not. I personally didn’t enjoy that game. But obviously, many, many people did and would disagree with my critiques. That’s totally fine! I’m just saying I’m enjoying Yakuza 0 for merits similar to what I’ve heard in connection with the Witcher franchise- and I could also see people having similar gripes, too! I’ve been on a well documented single player drought over the past couple months. Yakuza 0 finally broke me out of that, and it’s been a thrill. Getting out of the COD grind cycle has been a joy. This is a lovely experience that rewards curiosity by sparking yet more curiosity. I can’t wait to see how it continues to open up. Expect my Twitter account to go on about this for a while.

Mario 64- I have 8 stars! I’m told I have like, 113 more to go, a number which makes me groan.  So far, Mario 64 has felt like an obligation that is occasionally fun. It’s very dated, but it has the DNA that would go on to make later games like Odyssey an absolute joy.  Games like these feel more like an exercise in filling in my gamer history gaps than they do labors of love. Like most retro games, I have a hard time getting into Mario 64 for longer than 20 minutes at a time. So this will likely be a long-running project.

Star Wars: Squadrons- I probably should have known better, but I picked this game up ‘cuz the reviews were decent and the price felt right. Good news is that in the couple of hours I’ve spent with it, the gameplay is mostly solid and the graphics are beautifully rendered. It feels like both Rogue Squadron AND X-Wing, which is a hell of an accomplishment. Bad news is several of the missions appear to be badly broken, requiring numerous restarts. The game is generous with checkpoints, so it’s not a huge deal, but it is annoying. Hopefully they patch that stuff. I also haven’t tried multiplayer yet. None of my friends have bit on picking this up, so I’m not sure when or if it will happen. Assuming I can power through the hammy story, I’ll at least finish the campaign sometime down the line, even if I can’t be bothered to care how any of this fits into the larger world of Star Wars.

Warzone- Still doing that Season 6 thing! Subways have been mostly a disappointment for me so far, and the new marksman rifle has made the current meta a veritable hell for anyone with underdeveloped quick scoping skills, but I still get a couple matches in every day.

ANIME

God of High School- To say God of High School moves fast is an understatement. True to form, it sprinted its way through the finale. It’s got some lovely sequences, and I can’t wait to get my hands on the OST, but beyond a couple of choice battles, it didn’t leave a strong impression on me. I’m glad I saw it, but I’m not thirsting for a new season.

Dragon Ball- I switched over to the English dub of this show. I don’t usually do that, but I was struggling to keep my attention. I think in a way it helped? The English dub actors are far more cartoonish and silly, which really plays to the absurd animation and story turns. I’m on S1E13, and the first summoning of the dragon just happened. I won’t spoil except to say...this show has a deeply specific sense of humor, and I’m starting to dig it?

Fire Force- Season 2 is finally taking off for me. I’m on ep 14, and the focus has shifted over to the mysterious Joker. The battles have been compelling, as have been the mysteries placed by his storyline. I was struggling with feeling invested in S2 thus far, but the past few ep’s have reminded me of why I found this show special in the first place- when it gets serious and stays focused, it’s one of the tightest active shonen stories.

Manga

I’ve been on a bit of a manga break lately. Today I did take time with another chapter of Fruits Basket, which continues to be a lovely delight. I also recently received Master Edition copies of both Fairy Tail and Berserk. This week, my goal is to finish both Fruits Basket and my latest volumes of One Piece so I can dive into my new Master Editions.

Music

I haven’t had much change in my music tastes lately. I’ve been listening to a lot of Kompany and other dubstep artists, mostly ‘cuz I find the deep bass and variety of sounds soothing to me while I’m writing and zoning out during sessions of Cities: Skylines. I also enjoy its tempo while I’m running. Anything that helps the time pass, really.

Tabletop Games

I played 6 hours of DND this weekend. It was mostly a free-form improv session where I let the players do basically anything they wanted to within the gameworld we established during The Lost Mines of Phandelver. It was very heavy on roleplay, without a single instance of combat. While I was personally exhausted after the session, the players expressed that they had a very good time. We’ll be looking to finish up what they started in a bonus session for October!

Wrastlin!

My WWF Discord group just finished 1999 King of the Ring. Mr. Ass won! One of our folks actually got her bracket right. I had predicted Kane winning, so I was obviously out of luck on that. In the last RAW, Stone Cold Steve Austin just won the Heavy Weight Title from the Undertaker in an unlikely win! We’ll see how long that stint lasts...

Streams

I tried streaming from my personal Twitch using a schedule last week!

It...had mixed results.

My Warzone streams were my most popular, which is funny, ‘cuz I’m not that good at Warzone. My least popular were my Dungeon of the Endless and Yakuza 0 streams, which is not a big surprise. Those games aren’t that fun to watch.

I wanted to do the schedule as a an attempt to see if I could get a small audience or find some new meaning in games I was working through by presenting them as content.

I found the answer to both was more or less “not really”.

And that’s okay!

I also learned streaming, even just for an hour a night, is hard work. We should all be kinder to our content creators and in awe of the friends we have who do it even when on one is watching. Content creation is so unforgiving. Maybe if I stuck with it longer I’d have found my niche, but honestly, I just enjoy games for the games, and turning them into content just isn’t my speed. 

I’ve been doing the whole SpriteClub thing per usual. I’m a paid subscriber now! And I even am on a greeting basis with some folks. That’s been really cool. We had debuts this weekend too, where creators submit new fighters. The system matches them with other fighters to determine ratings. It’s a lot of fun, and the event always has this festival atmosphere to it. 

I’ve also been watching a lot of streams from the gals over at hololive-EN. Specifically, I’ve been watching Gawr Gura, Amelia Watson and Mori Calliope. It’s become nightly viewing in my household. I’ll save the debate on V-Tubers for a different place, suffice to say I have enjoyed the games they’ve presented and the personalities they’ve developed, and I think the success they’ve found is well earned. There are some talented folks behind these projects, and I find the streams to be relaxing, enjoyable, and at hours I can actually tune in for.

Personal News

Lately, I’ve been feeling pretty down. This can be easily correlated with the shift in temperature, for sure. I know a lot of people really dig fall, and I used to be a SPOOKY SEASON guy myself, but as I get older, fall has shifted into this period of mourning as I recognize the shortening days and the coming winter, which has always played hell with my body.

I’ve been struggling with a number of phantom symptoms that seem to pop up this time of year- bad digestion, terrible sleep (likely resulting from mild apnea), fatigue and heart palpitations. In turn, my mental health has been seriously flagging. 

At the suggestion of my therapist, I’ve started up a new vitamin regimen including a multivitamin and magnesium. I’ve also focused on finding potassium enriched foods and have cut back significantly on my drinking and caffeine. So far, this has actually resulted in me gaining weight ‘cuz I’ve been indulging in a lot of sugar as a coping mechanism, but I’m working through getting back to a healthy place where I can both track my intake but also be content with where I’m at. Right now I’m doing my best to try and fight the urge to become a Nap Guy. 

Last week I took several naps, even on my off days, and I’ve had a hard time sustaining my energy throughout the day, so I’m doing a better job of getting the sleep my body asks for while also structuring my day with more purpose so I’m left with less time just lying around wondering what to do.

Last week I broke my personal best for a 5K, breaking 24 minutes. For today’s run, I plan to try and break my 7:30 time on my mile run to the gym. 

For weights, I’ve gotten into a rhythm of 3 times a week, with Mondays and Fridays focusing on my core exercises- presses and curls, with Wednesdays focusing on pulls that are centered on working out my back, as well as bodyweight exercises such as dips and pull ups. This variation has given my limbs more time to heal up, which is welcome. Now if only I could be kinder to my body AFTER the gym, I might see some actual progress!

Work continues to be what it is. I’m at 30 hours now, which continues to be a huge positive. I don’t think I could keep at it with 40 hours. Change is a constant, and they seem to find new ways to make our jobs more convoluted every day. I have a quarterly review coming up with my new supervisor, but I have a feeling it won’t be nearly so traumatic as the last one, as I’ve done a good job of straightening up and flying right.

As I get more distance from August, I’m starting to recognize it- the events of my workplace disasters, my unplanned vacation, my off the rails spending and drinking- for what it was- it was a breakdown. And I’m still recovering from it. I was deeply unwell, and I took on some trauma- some of it wasn’t stuff I was looking for, some of it was stuff I brought on myself. I’m working through it. I wish I could say things like therapy have made a huge difference, but frankly, most of the work comes from stuff like this, where I’m just writing and being transparent with myself. That’s where I find the most healing work happens.

I still have a lot of my social media muted. When I need news, it typically filters through into my Discord, or Yahoo dings my phone or I see it on my Facebook feed. It’s fair to say that lately it’s felt like everything just Happens So Much.

I feel for my friends who are directly impacted- by the election, by the supreme court, by...just, everything. It all makes my own personal journey and endeavors feel...deeply small. At the same time, I just don’t have the emotional capacity required to house this perpetual crowd of events or constantly process everything in real time. I’m not sure when, if ever, I will have that again. I struggle to read ANYTHING- even friendly sites like Defector or The Discourse, without feeling an immense downswing.

I don’t know what the answer is. I wish I could just gut up and stay constantly plugged in for the sake of pals who might need to openly hash this out or draw attention to their causes or needs, but based on the past few months, I’m not sure I can take care of myself, let alone others. As I often tell close friends, my priorities these days are this small and in this order- Stay Healthy, Stay Kind, Stay Employed, Stay Productive- anything that goes right beyond that feels like a bonus in 2020.

At any rate, thanks for reading the update, y’all!

I’ll try and post these more regularly. I just wanted to check in with everyone and let y’all know how everything is going these days. Stuff like this helps me keep honest, as lately I’ve had a hard time sussing out what my direction is these days. Stay safe and well, and hit me up with what you’re up to, when you find a moment!